#you may notice this is the exact same way i characterize my very own evil middle aged woman Oas but it makes sense . amen.

[possessable]

additional headcanon for the memories in her soulscape being blacked out because I Like Her

[arahul-abyssia]

Looks like it's September again (already, somehow), so that means that it's Nintember again, which means I'll be writing again! Same dealio as last time, one story per five prompts, up to six writings total. (And I'll be putting most of each under a cut, because mobile users can't skip posts)

And for my first entry for @starprincesshlc and @jklantern 's wonderful little event, I shall once again be attempting to twist some modicum of continuity, characterization, and canon-compliance out of a world that clearly cares scarcely for all three.

The Great Act

~~ Art, Green, Dizzy, Fire, Strength ~~

It was the loud buzzing of his phone’s alarm clock that dragged him from his slumber. He awoke to find himself sprawled across the couch, which was in no way long enough for his lanky body and spindly legs. As he blearily reached out and slapped at the coffee table, hoping to find the rude device by pure luck, he also blearily reached out and slapped at his memories, trying to figure out what series of events had led him there. For a moment, they floated just out of reach, and then suddenly flooded back to him all at once.

Oh. Right. It’s all over.

Another sporting event had come and gone, and as usual, in spite of all the effort he put into training and practice, he had ultimately lost to the same people he always did. No matter the sport, no matter the plan, no matter the time, they always won. And why shouldn’t they? The heroes always win in the end, always securing victory against the villains.

And he was one of them: the purple-clad counterpart, mirror, and supposed rival to one of the land’s most revered figures. Meant to oppose, and meant to lose.

He was Waluigi.

The name still sounded absurd to him. He had no idea how two men whose names were ‘Mario’ and ‘Wario’ and who naturally served as near-perfect foils of each other, had managed to meet and form such a publicizable rivalry without any deliberate effort, but such was the case. However, the notion that the brother of one had his own doppelganger in the brother of the other (or cousin, they never did manage to keep that story straight), with the same dichotomies of name, body, and personality? That was simply and utterly ridiculous, far beyond even the realm of ‘too good to be true’. And yet, if anyone had caught on, they hadn’t made it known to him.

Lost in thought and routine, he realized he had reached and opened his wardrobe, where numerous sets of that purple hat, shirt, and overalls were staring him in the face. In a sickening sense, they were the centerpiece of a great work of art, the fabrication that was his entire public existence, the character that he and Wario had constructed so that he might further be the ‘evil counterpart’ to everyone’s favorite red-clothed fire-throwing hero. Mario was stout and a bit fat, Wario was stouter and fatter; Luigi was tall and a bit thin, so Waluigi was taller and thinner. Mario had an M as his emblem, Wario had an inverted M; Luigi had an L, so Waluigi had an inverted L. To any casual outside observer, it was perfect.

But unlike Mario and Wario, whose rivalry had been formed in their youth, Waluigi had never even met Luigi until Wario had made him his sporting partner. The most he had known of the legendary Mario Brothers was just that: they were legends, for the countless adventures and quests they went on. In truth, despite how much he played it up during each and every game, he bore no true grudge against the man he was supposed to hate; Wario had, for a time, convinced him that Luigi’s presence in the public eye was somehow detracting from his own, but he had long since realized that that wasn’t the case; in fact, it often seemed like Luigi himself was being snubbed by the public, with the vast majority of the glory placed upon Mario, no matter how much Luigi contributed.

And yet, despite his existence being little more than a convenient story, despite the stress that constantly acting like a jerk brought, and despite always losing at the games no matter what, none of it brought him any sadness: for all its ups and downs, he felt himself to be rather good at keeping up the act, and the sports were, at the end of the day, still fun.

So why do I still feel so… bad?

Routine and thought had once more brought Waluigi elsewhere, and he found himself once more on his couch, now dressed in his usual outfit, with some sort of drink in his hands, probably coffee or tea; he didn’t care to determine which at that moment. His eyes casually wandered around the room as he brought the mug to his lips.

Then, just as the liquid touched his tongue--apparently he had managed to make tea out of coffee beans--the answer came to him. All across the room’s walls and shelves was sporting equipment of every sort--tennis racquets, shin-guards, helmets, golf clubs, old kart wheels, giant dice blocks, a probably excessive number of deflated balls--and absolutely no other sort of decoration. He leaned forward to place the mug on the table, and in doing so noticed his gloved hands and violet sleeves. Who wore the outfit of a character that they supposedly were not, every single day? Apparently, him.

He didn’t do anything else. He had let the character that was Waluigi consume his life to the point that had no idea who he was outside of it. He had nothing that he did when sports weren’t involved. Wario didn’t dedicate all his time to his rivalry; he owned an entire video game company--an unstable and poorly-run one, certainly, but it was nevertheless another use of his time. Mario and Luigi had their own grand adventures, of course, which is also what Peach, the Yoshis, Bowser, and his horde of minions were all typically involved in.

They all had lives outside of the games, and what did he do during the interim times? He either tried to practice, on his own, in the few suitable locations that he could find when the world was arranged for adventure, in a vain attempt to not lose as bad when the next game came around, or he wallowed in his home, doing absolutely nothing of any import.

But what could he do? Waluigi was never anything beyond a fabricated counterpart to both Wario and Luigi, but he could not remember, even slightly, what or who he was before he embraced that role. That nearly all of his memories prior to his first meeting with his partner were lost to him, was, he shuddered to admit, rather unsettling. Not even his old name--if he even had had one, he could not recall anymore--would reveal itself to him, and it was not as though he could simply find out through some external means: he was never the best at record-keeping, and to really sell their act, he had had his name legally changed to “Waluigi” and all references to his previous identity erased.

He shook his head, attempting to clear his mind of thoughts. There was little sense in worrying and fretting over who he was in that moment--the chance of any sort of useful epiphany emerging from it was even slimmer than he was.

Ugh… better just try to distract myself…

The first suitable option to catch his eye was the TV remote lying on the table. He quickly grabbed it and flicked on the set, and was immediately assaulted by the cheery enunciation of the Lakitu news anchors on the aptly-named Lakitu News Channel. He recalled that that was the channel he had left the set on last night, after he had gotten quite fed up with the incessant and inane blathering about the events of that day’s final matches, and it took only about five seconds to figure out that they were still on that topic. Scowling, he began flipping through the various channels available, hoping to find something interesting enough to block out the melancholic thoughts that were biting at his mind, like a hundred tiny Muncher and Nipper Plants.

After a painfully long series of more newsrooms--all talking about the exact same thing, of course--and unappealing shows--Half of these are for children and other half would just make me feel even worse!--he stumbled across some sort of advice segment hosted by a Birdo (was it the Birdo? He couldn’t tell). With absolutely no better options, he resigned himself to sit back and listen halfheartedly to whatever trite tips she tried to provide; maybe they’d be amusing enough to at least give him a small chuckle.

“I hope you all enjoyed our lovely guest! Now, before we move on to the submissions from all you wonderful viewers, I’d like to reiterate some old, but tried and true, advice, which I hold very close to my heart.”

Oh, here we go…

“Something which you probably hear very often is to always be yourself, or to always be true to yourself…”

Feh, I can think of several people who definitely shouldn’t do that…

“But it may be that you don’t like who ‘yourself’ is, or perhaps you don’t know what self you even have to be true to…”

Hah! As if… uh…

“And to that end, I’d like to say that there is always room for change. There’s always a way to make something new of yourself, to alter the parts of you that you want to, to become a different, better person. ‘Yourself’ can be whoever you want it to be; never are you locked along one unending bleak path. Try new things! Experiment! Don’t let yourself be trapped in an endless cycle.

“Believe me when I say I have personal experience with this: I’ve done so many different things over a rather short period of time, trying to find what I wanted to do with myself, who I wanted to be. Even now, I’m still not entirely sure if this is my supposed ‘calling’…! But I never got anywhere by doing nothing: it was on me to break out of my shell and search for myself, and now it’s on you to do the same.

“You don’t have to begin drastically, with a flying leap of faith--I think we’ve all walked over enough cliffs by now to know that!--but, if this is the sort of mindset you find yourself in, why not try taking some small steps today? It could be as simple as wearing a new outfit, or talking to someone new, or partaking in a new pastime.”

Birdo continued to elaborate on her point, but Waluigi--or, whoever he was beneath that--had stopped listening. He wanted to make some snark about what she said; he wanted to rationalize how what she described couldn’t ever apply to him; but, he found that he couldn’t. He had attempted to follow similar advice long in the past, and failed, but something about the way she phrased it, managed to affect him more deeply than he had thought possible. It was as though her words had dug beneath his shields and layers and pierced something somewhere in his core; pulled a lever, turned a handle, flipped a switch.

A strange sensation washed over him, one he could only describe as a blazing fire--nay, an inferno--igniting within him. He had felt the touch of flame countless times over the years, but not even the innumerable rage-fueled volleys he had endured, all combined into a single force, could compare to what now burned in his soul.

He leapt up from the sofa and ran to his bathroom. Staring at him from within the mirror was a character, a costume, a facade. It was not who he was. He grabbed a towel, dampened it, and proceeded to scrub away the pink paint on his nose; Wario and Waluigi’s noses were defined by that bright rosy color, but his was not. He then tore open a cabinet and grabbed his bottle of mustache product; normally, it was used to create the signature angular mustache of Waluigi, but today, it would shape the hairs into something softer and curlier. Whether that was what he would ultimately like did not matter: he was experimenting! He was changing himself!

Though the man that stared back at him from the glass now bore a much different visage, it was still framed by the purple cap and shirt, yellow emblem, and dark indigo overalls. He tore them off, then opened his wardrobe once more and threw all the copies of that same outfit to the ground. Hidden behind them were old clothes that he hadn’t worn for many, many years. He grabbed the first garments he saw--a casual dress shirt and gaudy neon-yellow shorts. Did those go well together? It didn’t matter. Without hesitating, he put them on.

He quickly glanced in the mirror again: the ensemble was nearly complete, but just missing one last touch. He thought on it for a moment, then stricken with brilliance, hurried to his modest backyard, where the roses he performed with in the games grew. He plucked one from its bush and affixed it to his hair, then ran back to the mirror to observe himself one more time.

His mismatched get-up would likely garner many stares from others, though he wouldn’t mind them at all; if he had anything in common with Waluigi, it was that they both loved being the center of attention. Even still, that’s not what mattered. A whole new day lay before him, a whole new day to be someone new, someone different; to move on from the cycle he had been stuck in, to take a whole new step forward.

He returned to the sitting room and turned off the television, then went to the front door. Taking a deep breath, he turned the handle, threw it open, and marched into the daylight, the daylight which felt far fresher and warmer than it had in a long time, though even it held no candle to the flame that continued to blaze within him.

Ready or not, world; here I come!!

[thepoppypress]

The Battleline Between Good and Evil (Runs Through the Heart of Every Man)

Chapter 7: 

There wasn’t much of a rush at first. Peter liked to think it was more shock than anything, but a part of him knew that this had happened far too often for him to really be in shock. It wasn’t until about ten to fifteen minutes after Commissioner Gordon had been taken into the manor did the flames of his rage finally burst.

Piper, ever the observant puppy, came up to him with her tail between her legs, noticing and responding to her master’s distress. Peter’s eyes softened as he ran a hand through her soft fur. Titus lumbered up to him not long after, resting his large snout onto Peter’s lap. He let out a strained chuckle.

“Thanks, Titus,” he said and received a lick on his hand from his large tongue. A presence approached from behind him.

“Parker,” a stiff voice said. Peter hummed, not really interested in turning around to face Damian. Peter could tell Damian was a little nervous, as his heart rate had elevated a bit. “Are-” a pause came, “are you alright?” There was a note of reluctance in Damian’s tone as if he wasn’t sure he should be there. Peter let his lips twitch up slightly.

“Fine.” Damian came to stand in front of Peter. “Well, as fine as I can be.” They were silent for a while, before Peter heard heavy footsteps lumbering towards the room they were in.

“Hey Bruce,” he called out noncommittally. The footsteps stopped before the door.

“How are you holding up, Peter?” The deep voice of the head of house asked. Peter shrugged, not really caring if Bruce could see or not. He probably noticed though.

“Like I told Damian, as good as I can be.” Bruce entered the room, coming to stand next to Damian, both men looming over Peter like it was their job to do so.

“Is there anything we can do?”

“Can you tell me where Harley is?” A regretful look came upon the man’s handsome face, though his son’s expression was as ambiguous as ever.

“If I could, Pete, I would. But I don’t.” Peter scoffed, running a hand through chestnut curls with agitation.

“So there is something the great Batman doesn’t know,” he mumbled to himself, though he could tell that Bruce and Damian heard it. Both men froze, and while their faces remained unreadable, he could see the surprise coursing through their eyes.

Bruce’s voice was quiet, though Peter could hear the strain.

“How did you know?” Peter levelled them with a cool look, and despite not planning to reveal that he knew at that exact moment, he didn't think to feel bad about it.

“I know I’m not a detective, Bruce, but give me some credit. I can figure things out on my own, even if you didn’t make it so blatantly obvious.” Father and son straightened up, from shock, wariness, or pride, Peter doesn’t know. Peter just knew that they had many things to talk about so both stalked out of the room, footfalls heavy and rushed as the door banged closed on their way out. It was another five minutes before Peter retired to his own room, Piper and Titus following from behind.

-----

“Knock knock,” Dick’s voice called out, breaking Peter’s train of thought. Peter pushed himself into a sitting position, giving the handsome man a forced grin.

“Hey Dick,” he greeted softly. “What’s up?” The light seemed to bend around him in the doorway, making him seem like some sort of angel. In reality, Peter knew he was far from that.

“I heard you knew.” Peter gave a one shouldered shrug.

“I figured it out pretty early on.” Dick leaned on the doorway.

“When?” Peter thought for a moment, calculating.

“I knew you weren’t normal when I met you. I didn’t really realize that Bruce, Batman I mean, was mafia until I came here.” Silence commenced and Dick seemed to hesitate before entering the room, dark and warm.

“You-” The eldest Wayne paused, “you won’t do anything will you?”

The unspoken ‘you won’t tell?’ was quite obvious.

“Not unless you do anything in front of me. Otherwise, I won’t have proof.” Dick’s shoulders slumped before he came forward to sit on the bed.

“You realize now, that we can’t let you go, right?” Peter didn’t react to that statement.

“Would you have let me go even when I didn’t know you guys were mafia?” A tense moment passed before Dick’s shoulder came out of their slumped position, shaking with silent laughter. Peter already knew the answer before he even asked the question.

“No,” Dick admitted, and while it wasn’t a surprise to Peter, he had no idea why he was so gutted upon hearing the admission. Maybe it was his conscience kicking in. “No, I suppose not. You know, gorgeous, it’s so weird.”

“What is?”

“I’ve killed more than my fair share of people,” Peter’s chest ached but he didn’t otherwise react, “but I’ve never had anyone make me feel the way you do.” Peter leaned back onto his hands, his arms bearing the weight of his torso and his heavy heart.

“You realize that makes you like a psychopath, right Dick?” At that, the look on the other man’s face became pensive.

“More like a sociopath. That’s what I would characterize me as. I saw my parent’s murder, you know.” The sudden change in subject gave Peter a bit of whiplash and he did not know this. Peter knew that Bruce Wayne had acquired Dick Grayson when his parents died from a nasty fall. He also knew that Dick Grayson watched them fall off that platform.

He always thought it was hard on him, considering circumstances and all, but then he remembered that this was not the same Dick Grayson from the comics, but darker, a shadow version of the light that Dick was supposed to be. “I saw those men sabotage the ropes. I could’ve stopped it,” the look in Dick’s blue eyes was intense, as if testing Peter, “but I was so damn curious.” Peter licked his lips, suddenly dry. His hands started to sweat and his heart thudded with a ferocious force in his ribcage.

This is not where he saw this conversation going and he didn’t like it one bit.

“Curious? About what would happen?” The blue eyes bore into him a little while longer before looking away and Peter felt like collapsing against the mattress, the weight gone from his body, no longer paralysing him.

“Yeah, that sounds about right. I was young and I didn’t always know how things worked so I was curious about what would happen if those men cut the ropes and my parents still used them. I felt bad afterwards. They were genuinely good people, Pete. That’s why I exacted my revenge on the people who did that to them.” Their gazes met as Peter stared incredulously at the other man. The intention of his stare didn’t need to be said.

“They were still my parents, Peter. It felt right.” Peter scoffed, turning away from Dick completely, though the feel of those blue eyes burning into him didn’t fade away.

“Felt right after you used them in some sort of sick experiment like they were lab rats.”

“Well-” Dick started to justify it, but Peter knew that even if it seemed like the most logical explanation, it would still be wrong.

“Well nothing, Dick. They were people.”

“So?” Peter’s head snapped over his shoulder to meet Dick’s glowing eyes. At least, they seemed to be glowing.

“So?! That’s all you have to say?!” The full gravity of Peter’s situation dawned on him. The person he was sitting with, while not completely dark and vicious, was morally grey and would not hesitate to do whatever would benefit him and all that he cared about.

“People are expendable,” the casualty with which Dick said that was like a knife to the gut, “they come and go and it’s natural. Our history precedes us and our kind, from the slums and the impoverished, are known to be those who either kill for survival or for fun, but killers nonetheless. Times may change, Peter, and so will civilizations,” Dick stood up from the bed, the springs beneath him creaking as they righted themselves, “but humans will always stay the same. Till the very end.”

Peter let go of the sheets, his grip starting to rip through the seams. Instead, he clenched his fists hard, back towards the door and Dick, his face shadowed in the darkness.

“This is the world that you’ll be living in from now on, Pete. Harley was already living in it before you came along. She got used to it. She survived. Now, it’s your turn. And I hate to do this, bambi, but behave,” Peter flinched at the warning note in his tone, similar to Tony’s when Peter did something in the lab but with a much more vicious intent, “before my family and I are forced to do anything drastic.”

“You’d kill me?” There was a pause before Dick answered. It made Peter sick to know that Dick had to hesitate. It meant that he could if he wanted to. At least, he could if Peter didn’t have his powers. Dick stood up and headed to the door as he responded.

“No, we don’t kill anyone unless we really have to. You’re close with a lot of our family and our associates so that gives you rapport, but don’t think for a second that we won’t do something if you force our hand.” The older man paused for a second, hand on the knob.

“On another note, it would probably be best if you didn’t leave the house for a few days. Just for, you know. Safety purposes.”

‘Mine or yours?’ The vigilante thought silently before asking,

“So you’re locking me in here?” The golden halo of light that bent around Dick made it seem as if his eyes were glowing as he looked back at his guest-turned-prisoner.

“If you want to call it that. You still have free reign of the manor, bambi, and all of its features, but for now, leaving is out of the question. At least until my family and I get this situation figured out.”

‘What’s there to figure out?’ It wasn’t as if he was someone important. They already have the police under their control, and it was a lengthy process getting other government factors into play, like the FBI. If he were to do that, he’d have to play the long game and Peter truthfully didn’t know how much time he had left.

In his thoughts, the younger man didn’t see the way Dick’s hand tightened on the knob of the door or how his shoulders tensed slightly; didn’t see the way the blues of Dick’s eyes glinted guiltily before he turned away. Peter was silent as Dick left, closing the door until only a slight crack revealed a sliver of light into the room.

Of all the Wayne family, he didn’t think Dick would be the one to deliver the threat. He thought Jason or Damian would be much better at it. However, he is aware of how he looks and they probably thought it would be best to have someone closer with him, and known to be softer than his brothers.

‘Yeah,’ Peter thought, ‘Dick was definitely the best person to send in.’

And now he was left with a dilemma. On one hand, Peter, who had entered this kind of life when he donned that red and blue suit, was on intimate terms with this lifestyle. He knew what it was like and was familiar with it.

On the other hand, he was on the opposite side of the Wayne family (at least, in this universe). He could not condone what they have done, are doing, and will do, even in the name of fighting against crime. So to sit idly by while they wreak this kind of havoc on streets like Gotham’s, which are already very heavily shrouded in crime and darkness, weighs heavily on his heart and on his mind.

“But I’m already so deep in,” he sighed to himself, his brows furrowing together before he perked up in realization.

‘Of course!’ Peter remembered the lesson that the Black Widow herself, Natasha Romanoff taught him a couple of years back.

“Make the best of your situation,” she said sternly just as they were about to be deployed on a mission, “and survive to the best of your ability. This life is messy, spiderling, and horrible. Roll with the punches. And remember,” her eyes were unreadable, Peter remembered, and very serious, “there is always opportunity in chaos.”

“There is always opportunity in chaos!” All Peter needed to do was to resolve this situation as best he could. That would mean going in himself and dismantling the Joker and his goons before the Wayne family ever have to get involved. Easier said but Peter’s done more difficult things. Then, he would need to speed the process of getting home. No more sitting on his ass and waiting for Dr. Strange to find him. He needed his own solution. Again, easier said than done but he would deal with his problems one at a time.

For now, he would deal with the one most prominent. Peter marched over to his bag, sitting by the desk and reached in, pulling out a small phone, frequently referred to as a burner. Typing in a number that he knew could be reached by, he sent a little text and waited for a reply.

It was time for preparations.

-----

Tony was hyperventilating.

“What the fuck is this?” He asked with terror in his tone, horror displayed plainly on his face. The boy er- man he had come to think of as a son was stuck in what was supposed to be a fictional world and had multiple men, all of whom looked like they could crush Peter, are chasing him because they like him.

‘What has the world come to?’ Stephen wrapped a supportive arm around his husband, who leaned into the touch, still as horrified as ever. It was about five minutes before Tony had had enough.

“Alright.” He stepped away from Stephen’s embrace. Stephen looked confused.

“Alright?”

“Alright,” Tony repeated. “I am getting my son back, if it’s the last thing I do. How do we do that?” The doctor was quiet for a moment.

“Alright,” he agreed (though it was a total overuse of the word ‘alright,’). “Let’s do this.”

-----

Peter scaled the wall, making sure that no one was looking. He had hacked into any street cameras nearby through a deployed gauntlet earlier and made sure that they were unable to spot him. Just in case someone had come looking. It was never a bad idea to make sure.

Not long after Dick had left his room, Peter locked it behind him and deployed his whole suit, putting it on stealth mode. After grabbing his backpack, he left through the lone window, making sure to be as quiet as he could be. It wasn’t hard considering his bone density lowered after the bite.

He crawled his way down to the ground and enabled cloaking, knowing that the Waynes were paranoid bastards. They probably had multiple contingency plans in place in case of an invader or many other things. From there, he ran towards the city at full speed, thankful for all the training he had gone through with the Avengers and Mr. Stark’s idea of having used the blueprints of Shuri’s Sneakers design and implementing them into the suit.

Everything was a blur as Peter ran at full speed (at his full speed, he can keep up with Bucky and Steve, and with time, probably pass them) and by the time he reached the edge of the city, he started swinging with his webs.

It was exhilarating to be doing this again. Peter found himself with a genuine grin on his face, a rarity since becoming stranded in Gotham. The familiarity of flying through the air at breakneck speeds, his backpack bouncing behind him as he grips onto the webs that he manufactured himself. The wind passed him by and it was like he was back in New York, saving people from the crimes of the night. Oh, how he missed it. He missed everything about it. New York was home, after all. Home.

‘I want to go home,’ he thinks morosely, severely lonely and depressed. The smile slid right off his face. His thoughts were silent the rest of the trip. It was about ten minutes before he landed on the roof of the Captain’s. No one was on the roof, as far as he could sense.

‘Good,’ he thought as he dropped down and retracted the suit around him. Walking towards the edge of the building, Peter crouched down and set his backpack onto the ground, bringing out a notebook and a pencil while waiting for his soon-to-be partner in crime. He dangled his feet over the side of the building as he wrote down what he was thinking.

About five minutes later, Peter could hear the strong heartbeat of Slade, and to the untrained (read: un-superpowered) ear, silent footsteps.

“I’m here, sweetheart,” Slade said quietly. Peter turned at the sound of his voice and gave him a small smile. Slade looked at him with a curious and attentive eye.

“Hey,” Peter’s voice came out slightly hoarse. Slade’s eye narrowed minutely, his leather jacket squeaking as he crossed his arms (they bulged out and holy shit, this is not the place, Peter!).

“What happened?” Peter let out a small laugh. He must’ve noticed my red rimmed eyes.

“Always straight to the point.”

“Did someone hurt you?” Slade’s tone was dangerous. The smile was off his face in an instant and he started to shake his head vigorously.

“No! Not at all!” The mercenary didn’t look convinced. Peter pursed his lips and in an effort to be sincere, he stood up and walked over to Slade, reaching and grasping his gloved hand in Peter’s own. The difference was rather stark. Slade was huge, afterall.

‘Not just in that one way,’ Peter’s inner thoughts seemed to smirk. Peter shook his head of that thought before a blush could spread over his cheeks.

“Slade,” he says, “I promise you that no one hurt me. However,” a blue eye sharpened at that, “someone did hurt one of my friends and kidnapped the other.”

“The clown girl?” Peter scowled and slapped Slade’s arm (as gently as he could).

“She is not a clown,” Slade raised an eyebrow (over the eye not in the patch). “But, yes, Harley. They kidnapped her and put Babs into the hospital.” The other eyebrow shot up, making a look of surprise.

“The Commissioner’s daughter? Betting the Waynes loved that.”

“Oh yeah, they’re over the moon,” Peter deadpanned. “The problem is I need help tracking Harley down.” Slade was silent for a moment.

“The Waynes wouldn’t help?” Peter shook his head, chestnut curls bouncing with the motions.

“It’s not that. They don’t need to be involved in this.”

“They’re going to be involved anyways. Aren’t you living at their house? Your friend was even there.” Peter let go of Slade’s hand, which seemed to twitch and hesitate, sighing.

“This will be faster. They’re in the limelight constantly. While I don’t doubt their investigative prowess, it’ll be harder for them versus, say, you. Also, they found out that I know. You know, about them?” The mercenary nodded in understanding.

“Okay.” Peter paused, hoping it meant what he wanted.

“Okay?”

“Okay,” Slade voiced his assent. “What do you need me to do?” Peter thought for a moment. He is pretty sure he can trust Slade. At the very least, if things truly go to shit, he has another home (world) to go to (though that really defeats the purpose of Uncle Ben’s words). Despite being a mercenary, Slade has yet to do anything that would make Peter deem him untrustworthy. It was also a gut feeling. Slade wouldn’t betray Peter.

“Slade,” Peter called, looking up at the taller man through long and dark eyelashes, “I can trust you, right?” Slade eyed the really innocent yet somehow sultry look.

‘Damn kid really knows how to work me,' he thinks.

“Yeah,” Slade nodded. “Yeah, you can, sweetheart.” The younger man was silent for a moment before he finally decided.

“Good. Because what I’m about to show you is on a need to know basis. I’m counting on literally no one believing you unless I let them know too.” At this, Slade cocked his head.

“Let me know what?” Peter didn’t answer the question. Instead, he started packing up his stuff, putting his laptop and notebook back into his backpack.

“First, let’s go see a certain someone.”

-----

While Slade drove to the hospital, Peter had checked the security cameras around the area before going in. Commissioner Gordon had gone home for the night as visiting hours were over. The father was obviously very distraught at being separated from his injured child but not even Bruce Wayne could tell sleep-deprived nurses and hospital staff what to do.

“Okay, pull off here,” Peter directed Slade onto a road that was a little ways away from the side of the hospital. This was where the least amount of security cameras were and the cameras that were there, he had made fabricated footage to insert into the tapes, made easy by Mr. Stark’s suit and Ned’s hard and software that they integrated.

“Where’d you even learn how to do that?” Slade asked as he side-eyed Peter hacking into the cameras. Peter shrugged, a small smirk curving his lips. He was finally able to show that he is more capable than he seems. Slade had snorted at his lack of an answer, apparently amused.

They exited the car, making sure to grab their things. Slade tried to grab all the equipment in the back but Peter managed to convince him to leave it; that it’d be heavier than they needed.

“Hey, I said I trusted you. You said I could, right?” Slade seemed to know what Peter was going to say but indulged him anyway (very much so exasperatedly, but still).

“Yes, I said you could, sweetheart.”

“Then I want you to trust me.”

“I do,” Slade said without hesitation. Peter felt a rush of warmth through his chest before brushing it aside.

‘It’s not the time for this right now,’ he scolded himself.

“Then please trust me when I say that we do not need all that shit in the back.” The mercenary scowled.

“That’s my equipment, sweetheart. I regularly need and use that ‘shit in the back,’” he said with air quotes. Peter snickered at him.

“Well, don’t worry, okay? I know what I’m doing.” Slade had a dubious look on his face, though his expression barely changed since he met Peter on the rooftop. Finally, the taller man’s shoulders slumped in defeat.

“Fine,” there was a heavy and exasperated note in his tone, “but if we end up dying, I’m going to blame you.” Peter’s doe brown eyes scrunched up into crescents as he smiled. A slight dimple showed and Slade suddenly forgot what he was thinking about.

“Don’t worry, Slade. I’ll protect you.” Peter was pretty sure even the cameras could pick up the loud snort that came from Slade, even though they were audio silent.

-----

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Slade whisper-shouted as they approached the side wall of the hospital. Peter glanced behind him before looking back up at the wall of the hospital. Nearest the top floor is where Peter knows where Barbara’s room is. They’ll need to climb to the top. Peter smirked.

“I’m getting ready to climb.” Slade blinked.

“With what?! We left all the equipment in the car!” Peter shrugged with a look on his face that said ‘and?’ Suddenly, the younger man’s face got serious. “Alright Slade. What I’m about to show you is a secret. Harley doesn’t even know. For now, I want to keep it that way.” Peter waited until Slade nodded in agreement before rolling up his sleeve and rotating the wheel on his watch. The top screen popped upwards and he pressed down on it, activating his suit.

Peter felt the nanobots climb all over him, covering him from head to toe. It still retained the new car smell that Peter remembered telling Mr. Stark. He spread and clenched his hands, revelling in the feel of the suit back on his skin and the knowledge that he could now use his powers again without holding back. He looked towards Slade, ignoring the wide eye that was directed at him and held out a hand. “Let’s go.”

It was a few moments before Slade physically shook himself out of the little funk he was in and took Peter’s hand without a word, though his stance was wary. While holding Slade’s hand, Peter turned around and placed his large hand onto his shoulder.

“Alright,” he said with utter seriousness in his voice, “get on.” Slade was silent again.

“What?!” Peter rolled his eyes and faced the mercenary. He stepped forward and took both his hands, turned back around and let them fall onto his shoulders.

The spider themed superhero reached back and grabbed Deathstroke by the unders of his knees and surged upwards, lifting the mercenary onto his back. Slade’s torso fell over Peter’s head and for a moment, Peter was sure that the man on his back fell through the sheer shock of someone Peter’s height and weight (literally half of Slade’s) lift someone like him.

“Okey dokey. Hold on,” he sang and jumped about 20 feet into the air and onto the building, revelling in the catch in Slade’s breath as he clung onto Peter with a tight grip as Peter stuck to the wall with his feet alone.

“What the actual fuck.” The shock in his partner’s statement made Peter laugh.

“I’ll explain later, okay? Right now, we have a job.”

“You’d better,” he’d heard Slade grumble. It only made him laugh more.

-----

“What happened?” Bruce asked his first son as he descended the stairs. Dick had that steely look in his eyes, the one he had when he was forced to do something drastic, and it made Bruce antsy. There wasn’t much that could faze his eldest but it would’ve been bad if he had that certain glint in the blues of his eyes.

“I told him.” While the Wayne head had an inkling about what Dick told the little object of all his son’s affections (and the platonic affections of his unofficial daughter), he preferred if Dick told him straight.

“What exactly did you tell him?”

“I told him about my parents and that he should get used to this life because he’s in it now.” Dick looked directly at his adoptive father.

“Does he have to be though? I don’t want him to be.” Bruce sighed.

“It can’t be helped, Dick. He knows.” Bruce noticed something. “What else did you tell him?” His son was silent for a moment, realizing he was caught. Of course, Bruce and everyone else in his family know him better than anyone else in the world. No one else could get close enough anyway.

“I said that he shouldn’t leave the manor for a while. At least until we figure this out.” Bruce smirked at his son, eyes full of knowing.

“There isn’t anything to talk over, Dick. He can walk free if he doesn’t have any proof. You’re just trying to keep him here longer.” The eldest Wayne child stiffened before slumping.

“Before he inevitably leaves us.”

“Is that what’s going to happen?” Damian came from nowhere, signature scowl on his face. His other brothers followed him as they, too, showed similar expressions of displeasure.

“He has no proof of anything and he'll be staying for a few days. What more can we ask for?” Jason crossed his arms over his massive chest, though looking impossibly small next to his youngest brother.

“His forgiveness is too much. He won’t forgive us and we don’t expect him to, Dick.” Tim was right, however Dick couldn’t help but fight back.

“He knew the entire time, guys. He knew we were shady and the way we are.” Damian snorted.

“Anyone with eyes and half a brain can, Grayson. It’s not that impressive.” Damian gestured to each of them. “We don’t exactly hide it.”

‘Though people can be oh so dumb,’ the youngest thinks derisively. Bruce hummed, effectively silencing all other voices in the room.

“Though,” he said, tone thoughtful, “he could be useful. He’s helped Tim with countless things and Dick has a point. If he knew we were dangerous, why didn’t he stay away?” Everything was still silent. “I think it’s worth a shot to convince him to stay.” Damian scoffed.

“That may be, father, but his one reason to stay is now gone. How do you propose we convince him then? Save her, and then extort his good will into staying because we saved his best friend?” The head of the Wayne household smirked. His sons never failed him.

“It’s not a bad idea,” Tim mused, a pondering expression on his face. Jason grinned with a feral ferocity.

“I’m down.” The bass in his voice was rumbling. He really liked the idea. Dick smiled.

“It also involves tracking down the asshole who did this to Babs, so hell yes. You know, Buce, Commissioner Gordon is going to want to get in on this too right?” Bruce nodded, hair flopping as he does so.

“Of course he is welcome to join. He’s like family. So,” he made eye contact with each of his sons and Alfred, who had snuck himself in a while ago, “why don’t we get to work?”

It was phrased as a question but everyone in the room knew it wasn’t one. The ravenous and vengeful looks in their eyes were enough to make even Lex Luthor anxious.

-----

The beep of the EKG machine broke Peter’s heart as he and Slade silently entered the dark hospital room. Through his suit’s lenses, he could see the basic outlines of things with their heat signatures. People on the night shift were passing by their door but other than that, no one but him, Slade, and an unconscious Babs were in the hospital room. Peter carefully let Slade slide off his back, taking care not to make noise.

“Stay there,” Peter whispered and headed forward, evading the efforts of his partner to grab him and pull him back to his hulking figure. He had identified a lamp and crept up on it, pulling on the little metal string, illuminating the room.

Something sailed towards his head and his Spidey Sense went crazy. He caught it in mid-air, instincts quick and precise. He turned around and observed the object thrown. A knife lay in his hand, bright against the light of the lamp. Barbara Gordon lay in bed, eyes open with caution and determination, switching between looking at him and Slade, hand in the air.

“Who-” she wheezed, coughing heavily, “who the fuck are you?” Peter, in a sign of goodwill, placed the knife gently onto the ground and held up his hands in a surrender.

“It’s okay, Babs, it’s just me.” The helmet retracted to show his face, much to the red head’s surprise. “It’s Peter.” The shock in her blue eyes made him chuckle a bit. It almost made him want to see Slade’s face when he had found out earlier.

“What the fuck Peter. I could’ve killed you!” Peter smiled knowingly.

“No,” he said softly, “you wouldn’t have.” She looked on in shock while Slade stood by silently. Peter approached the bed, the suit retracting completely as the nanobots slid smoothly back into his watch. “How are you?”

Babs scoffed.

“I’ve been better,” she said sardonically, though her eyes were alight with pain. Peter’s face softened at her obvious hurt.

“Yeah. But hey,” a charming smile stretched across his face, “at the very least, you’re as beautiful as ever.” Tears gathered at the corners of her eyes (a few of them trailed down her face), and she let out a wet laugh.

“I’m never going to walk again,” came a whisper but the words were no less devastating. Peter felt like he was punched in the gut and reached out to grab her hand, which squeezed his back with a ferocity that belied her devastation.

“That’s what the doctors said?” She nodded, obviously choked up. Peter clenched his teeth and looked over at Slade, only to find him staring at the scene in front of him with an observing eye. “Well, don’t worry. Slade and I are going to get to the bottom of this.”

“But, I thought Dick and Bruce were going to do that?” Was it okay to lie? He’s gotten better at it. Natasha is a really good teacher.

“We’re helping,” he lied straight through his teeth, aware of Slade stiffening on the other side of the room. Babs scoffed again.

“If that was the case, then why are you sneaking in when you can literally just walk in through the doors?” Damn Babs for being so smart. He quickly came up with an excuse.

“Because visiting hours are over and I’d rather not have my name on the visitor logs?” Barbara shrugged, wincing at the pain that the movement brought.

“Fair enough.”

“I just want to know what happened and anything that can help us figure out where Harley is.” A pained look took over Babs’ expression.

“I’m so sorry, Peter. If only we didn’t go out.”

“That’s not your fault Babs. You don’t have to feel guilty. However, I would appreciate it if you could tell us what you two were doing that night.” Barbara sighed, tucking stray strands of ginger hair behind an ear.

“She was contacted by her ex about a week ago and said he had wanted to apologize. He sent an address and told her to come and meet him. She didn’t want to go alone and she didn’t want you in danger so she asked me to come.” Tears sprang to Babs’ eyes. It was jarring to see someone usually so put together break down. “It was obviously a trap but we thought we could handle it between us two. We were wrong.”

Peter was quiet for a while. While he could be mad at Barbara and Harley for not telling him, he was also mad at himself.

‘Why didn’t I tell them about my powers right away? Maybe if I did, this all could’ve been avoided.’ Harley was yet another person on the growing list that Peter could not save. Guilt weighed heavily on his chest and it was likely that it weighed the same on his redheaded friend’s as well. He reached out and clasped her shoulder with a bare hand.

“It’s not your fault, Babs. Slade and I will get her back, so don’t worry,” he said softly. Blue eyes swiveled to meet his doe brown.

“How can you be so forgiving, Pete?” It came out as a whisper but her heartbreak was easily identified. Peter smiled sadly.

“Despite what you all think, I am familiar with situations like these. Now,” he came closer to the bed, “was there anything at all that could hint about where the Joker took Harley?” Her eyebrows pulled together and her expression became pinched. It was about a minute before she spoke again.

“I-I don’t remember much. A lot of pain, but,” she swallowed thickly, “as I was passing out, I heard someone say something about the sewers. It’s all pretty blurry after that but I definitely remember it.” Peter’s brows furrowed and he looked back at Slade who shrugged. The chestnut haired boy rolled his eyes.

‘So he’s no help.’ He sighed. ‘Looks like it’s come down to this.’ He pushed his sleeve back to reveal his watch. Peter tapped on the screen and let it go into unlock mode.

“Karen,” he said, and it was only a second before the AI that Mr. Stark had created for him, the AI that he hasn’t talked to in a month responded.

“Hello Peter,” her odd voice answered, and while it could be surprising to others, it only served to give him comfort. “What can I do for you?”

“Can you remotely hack into the Gotham City Hall’s record system?” Peter made eye contact with Babs’ wide eyes and he then looked over to his partner, and saw his narrowed eye. He had a lot of explaining to do.

“Alright, I’m in. What do you want me to look for?”

“Look for the most updated, recent plans and blueprints for the Gotham sewer system.” Another minute before a hologram popped from his watch, the wide prints of the sewers showcased obviously.

“Here. Is there something you would like me to look for specifically?”

“Yeah. Any spaces that can be used as a base of operations, where about 50 people can work?” The hologram zoomed into a spot on the blueprints.

“After analyzing the data, I believe the place you’re looking for is right here. It is directly underneath the Gotham Harbor.” Peter looked towards Barbara.

“You think she can be there?” The woman sputtered before answering.

“Uh- Yeah. Yeah, that can definitely be it. Um, Pete?”

“Yeah?”

“What was that?” Peter gave a small smile.

“This is my AI, Karen. Karen, this is Barbara Gordon and Slade Wilson. They’re friends of mine.”

“Nice to meet you,” was her cordial answer.

“Awesome,” Barbara breathed.

-----

“I’ll come visit you after this is over okay?”

“Wait, you’re not going to do this yourselves, are you?” Peter paused, briefly looking down at Slade who had made it to the ground safely.

“We’re working with-”

“Peter.” Her interruption shut him up quickly. She knew.

“I know that you’re not working with them.” A pause.

“Is it that obvious?”

“What happened?” Another pause of silence lapsed.

“I found out. About them. And their jobs. The one not known.” To Peter’s superhuman ears, he heard her breath being caught in her throat.

“And then what?”

“I told him that I have no proof. He told me that I should stay in the manor for now.”

“Dick did?” Peter nodded. “And you didn’t listen?” He smirked over his shoulder, getting ready to drop. There was only so much time. Who knew what the Joker would do to Harley if he didn’t stop him.

“Have I ever really been one to listen?” She gave a small chuckle.

“I guess not.” Peter’s eyes softened.

“Don’t worry about me. I’m more capable than you know.” The smile on her face matched his.

“Good luck.”

On the way back to the truck, Slade was quiet. Peter could tell he was also brooding. It wasn’t until they were safely back in the vehicle that he broke the silence.

“Slade, I know that was a shock, but you have to understand, I couldn’t tell any-” The mercenary held up a large hand. Peter quickly quieted.

“Look, sweetheart. You don’t owe me anything. Don’t get so caught up. Plus, we can talk about this later, when this is all over. For right now, focus on the mission.” Peter nodded, a contemplative look on his face as Slade started the engine and pulled out of the area. The superhero pulled up the camera feed and began rolling it again, wiping any evidence that they were ever there. Then, a thought occurred to him.

“Hey, Slade?” The mercenary hummed in reply.

“What if we don’t make it?” His answer was instantaneous.

“We’ll make it.”

“But-”

“We’ll make it!” His voice was rough and the statement came out in a growl. Peter clenched his teeth.

“You never know,” he said quietly. Slade shook his head.

“I won’t let anything happen to you.” He turned his head to look Peter in the eyes. His one eye was dead serious and assured. “I promise.”

It wasn’t for another few minutes that Peter responded.

“Alright,” he nodded, “I believe you. Now. Let’s go beat some clown ass.”

Slade’s laugh could be heard a mile away.

-----

Tim paged everyone in the family, who all rushed down to the Cave, save for Dick, who had gone to talk to Peter.

“I found where they are.” Damian crossed his arms, sneering.

“And how exactly did you do that, Drake?” Tim rolled his eyes.

“I highly doubted that the Joker would be above ground, since we have influence over a majority of Gotham. Joker lost his territory to Cobblepot earlier last year, after his encounter with Jason and they hate each other. So I was stumped as to where I could find him. Then, I remembered the underground of Gotham, consisting mostly of sewage systems. However, within those systems, I can only count a handful of places where he could hide. I’m betting he’s there.” Damian scoffed, green eyes hard.

“All conjecture.” His older brother shrugged, hair flopping.

“Maybe, but we don’t have much time. Besides, my instincts are almost never wrong. You know this, Demon Spawn.” Jason snorted.

“Alfred’s kitchen would seem to disagree.” Semblances of smiles appeared on everyone’s face, except for Tim’s, who sported a pout.

“How was I supposed to know that the spoon was in the bowl?!”

“Alfred told you, like, five times, Timmers.”

“It was 7 in the morning! I hadn’t had my coffee! It’s not my fault.” A huff.

“Sure. Whatever you say.”

“UGH!”

-----

“Peter?” Dick knocked on the door, voice and eyes soft. “Peter, are you there?” Silence met his questions. “We think we’ve made headway on where Harley is.” Still no reply. “Alright, well, I just wanted you to know.” Hurt was mirrored in his tone and Dick hesitated at the door, wanting to just burst in but he knew he couldn’t. He had already been cruel (any act of aggression against Peter was already labelled cruelty) to him earlier and didn’t want to fan the flames. “Call us if you need us.” The ‘call me if you need me specifically,’ was unsaid but understood.

Too bad he was talking to an empty room.

“Did Peter say anything?” Bruce asked as he watched his son descend the stairs once more. Dick shook his head and Bruce clapped his shoulder. “Head up, chum. Peter will forgive you. I know it. Besides, you could use Harley as leverage. Save her but for the price of staying with us. I’m not entirely sure I like the thought of him leaving either.” Dick raised an eyebrow. It was rare for Bruce to admit something so emotional (emotional for this family. We all know they literally have the emotional capacity of a fucking packing peanut. Like, collectively.).

“Maybe. We’ll see. Is everyone ready to go?” The head of the household smirked.

“Yup. We have several locations saved and we’ll need to split up when we get there.” Dick nodded, a similar grin on his face.

“Alright then. Let’s go put an end to this joke once and for all.”

-----

“Did we really need to contact him though?!” Tony whined at his husband, completely disregarding the man clad in black, green, and gold standing in front of them.

“I appreciate the love, Stark. And might I remind you that I am the one who volunteered to help you retrieve your son?” Tony scowled at the God of Mischief.

“You’re only helping because you like Peter.” Loki shrugged, a smug smile on his face.

“Yes, I suppose I am. You’re lucky I like the little spider.” The genius rolled his eyes, aware of his husband rolling his own eyes at him.

“Whatever. What do we do?” Loki smirked.

“You tell me what you know and we get to work.”

Tony grumbled.

“Better be quick.”

He just wanted his son back.

Previous: Part 6

Next: Part 8

[chibimyumi]

Hello Chibimyumi, In a recent post about @akumadeshitsumon, you mentioned that you enjoyed their portrayal of Sebastian as someone who "has seen everything of humans but understands nothing." That's a fascinating characterization of our favorite trash-demon; if you have the time, would you mind expounding a bit more on what you mean by this, or if there are any particularly illustrative instances of this aspect of his character from the manga or musicals?

【Referred post: My favourite Kuro-fics】

Dear Anon,

First of all, I hope this post finds you (and anybody else) in good health! And secondly, my apologies for my super late reply. I think I left your ask hanging for about two weeks?

Now coming back to your ask; what did I mean by describing @akumadeshitsumon​’s characterisation of “has seen everything of humans but understand nothing.” Most concretely, I meant that Sebastian has seen more sides of humans than any of us can imagine, and although he accepts everything at face value, he does not understand ‘why’ people continue these behaviours even though many are even aware that these behaviours are utterly foolish.

There are plenty examples of how this is the case, but allow me to make a short list of small analyses of representative examples.

Strangest human traditions - Marriage.

This is the most blatant example. In this reply Sebastian shares that he does not understand how humans have - in most if not all cultures - come to ascribe sacredness to ‘marriage’. This is not presented as a ‘super extreme feminist hot take’. Instead, Sebastian looks at the mechanism of marriage, and describes it as: “a ceremony in which they trade away members of their own species for a set price […] It seems to me that this is a rather nonsensical tradition, and though I understand the mechanisms of it, I fail to understand how humans have tricked themselves into believing the utterly unconvincing story that a financial trade that treats humans and their associated properties as commodities is in any way motivated by ‘love’, or how it may inspire a sense of virtue in those partaking in it.” (19/07/19)

Indeed, if we unpack marriage, it is trade. Humans love trade as attested by us being very money-centered creatures. Then how come people deny that the ‘biggest trade in a human’s life’ is ‘trade’ at all cost? Why must humans ‘bind each other to reproduce’, if reproducing in a ‘free market’ would ensure a wider genetic pool, benefiting humans as a species?

A miracle that humans still exist as a species - Hot Water

A second concrete example is this reply wherein Sebastian explains why he poured hot water directly onto O!Ciel, by simply admitting he did not know humans are so painfully fragile. He has probably seen humans being boiled to death, and also humans being frozen to death. But he must also have seen humans enjoying damn scorching onsens, or things akin to the ice-bucket challenge… But without actually testing the exact temperature of the water, there was no way for him to know just how ‘hot’ is ‘too hot’.

In this post I touched upon how Sebastian never had the opportunity to learn about the ‘preservation of humans’ before his contract with O!Ciel. Before his current contract, all he knew was to exert enough power to destroy; and as there is no upper limit to destroying humans, he never had to learn to ration his powers.

Good and Evil Binaries

In this answer Sebastian shares the story of him having come to see the human need of “an external focus to project all their fears upon, not to mention a scapegoat for all the evil in the world. […] If humans were to stop believing in creatures like me, they would be forced to recognise that the evil that occurs on earth is not the work of some external force, but rather the result of human actions.” (04/03/2019)

Obviously most humans in real world history have not seen any evidence of demons existing, but humanity has a long history of believing in demons. In Kuro-universe however, it is nevertheless interesting that Sebastian who does know that demons exist (duh) would use the word “believe” rather than “acknowledge”. Here he reveals that it is baffling that humans have ‘chosen to believe in something they have no proof of’, rather than acknowledging the evil of humans that is just right in front of us. This is probably part of the reason behind Sebastian calling all humans he has met ‘arrogant’.

In this post I wrote: “Sebastian has probably observed how humans will always believe they are in some kind of advantage over or are superiour to someone when the chance is given.” If humans were to put aside our pride and acknowledge how ‘evil’ is the product of human actions, we would - as a society - be much more efficient in tackling evil. Self-reflection, to begin with. What good is endlessly shoving responsibility away and ‘blaming the other’? All it does is preserving our own ego, but never bettering human behaviour.It is really baffling that human ‘arrogance’ has not been bred out of us, even though it is highly destructive. Just like in the example of ‘hot water’, it really is a miracle that we as a species still exist.

Musical

As for musical examples of Sebastian “having seen anything but understands nothing,” in Noah’s Ark Circus the doctor was slowly building his story to using human bones for making prostheses.

O!Ciel had not put two and two together yet during the doctor’s story, but Sebastyun already had. In the musical, Sebastian realised what the doctor had been up to even before his manga counterpart did (chapter 34).

In the musical Sebas turned to face the altar in the dark while the doctor was still talking. In theatre-language, the altar being in the darkness means that it is something people should not notice or pay attention to. Sebastyun however, already noticed the thing nobody else ‘should have’, and pulled a face that was an odd mixture between fascination and disgust.

The fact that Sebastyun noticed this “before anybody else did” is an indication that he has seen this type of debauchery in humans before. Something you have seen before is more noticeable, after all. Does he understand why humans have committed this type of debauchery though? No.

This weird mix between fascination and disgust is very interesting. This face reminded me very much of how humans see and “study” ginormous ZITS. We have seen plenty of zits in our lives, they never fail to disgust us, but they also never fail to fascinate us. ‘Fascination’ only happens when there is a certain level of mystery involved. To Sebastian who does not understand humans, human debauchery is a mystery.

Another example is in the same musical wherein Agni lectured Sebastian on him not even understanding the principle of taking care of the health of his master. It truly was like Sebastian saw water burn. He has seen humans for many centuries, but has so little understanding of humans and how humans function, that Agni needed to tell him the obvious.

Agni having to tell Sebastian THIS obvious thing is the flip-side of the coin that is the example from above. In the example with the doctor, Sebastian noticed the doctor’s “hobby” very early on because he has seen such evils before. But in this example with Agni, he noticed something ‘last’ because he does not ‘understand’.

Sebastian has seen enough examples of service from servant to master in his long life to be able to imitate the flashiness and gaudiness of service. But at the same time he understands so little of humans that he had no idea how to act when ‘initiative’ and ‘care’ were needed besides first-class service.

Yet again, Sebastian shows us just how little of humans he truly understands. He is like ancient Greek sculptors who studied bodies and could sculpt anatomically perfect statues, but understood nothing of how the human body truly worked.

[crusherthedoctor]

The Lutrudis Hadeer Characterization Masterpost

A while back, I made a big post about the thought process that went into the design for Lutrudis, as well as her name, species, and choice of weapons. In the midst of doing a bunch of other stuff (like the Eggman Sweet or Shite review, which is definitely still coming guys I swear, please don't leave me D':), I recently figured I could do the same for the character's... well, character, and provide some further insight into how her personality was shaped together. Cause why not, right?

Obviously, we won't be covering literally every single personality trait that Trudy has, like her hobbies and whatnot. If we went over all of that, we'd be so far into the future that Tumblr's search system might actually start working again. No, we'll just be keeping it to the central ingredients that make up the overall package.

1. A cool head? In my Sonic OC?

The recurring cast in the Sonic universe is filled with fiery, hot-blooded sorts in one way or another. Sonic might as well be the love child of Mentos and Diet Coke with how full of energy he is, Knuckles and Amy are both prone to letting their temper do the talking, Eggman... is Eggman, and the list goes on. And while there are a number of characters who are more low-key or even outright introverted by comparison, they still tend to exhibit a trait or two that makes them more in-line with the rest of the crowd, be it youthful excitement (Tails, Cream), a fiery temper (Blaze), or the odd bit of cockiness (Shadow).

So what better way to help make Trudy stand out... than by not really having anything like that at all? Contrary to most of the hot-blooded cast, it takes a lot to truly enrage her, and even then, you'll be lucky to get anything past tranquil fury. She's not particularly hammy either - flowery with her language at times, certainly, but not hammy - nor is she a cocky type, even against the weakest or most ridiculous of opponents, and although she does grow as a person over the course of the story she's involved in, all of this remains fairly consistent.

That's not to say that Trudy is not a passionate person. Far from it, in fact. She has a lot of passion. She just shows it in a different way than the average Sonic character.

2. Lutrudis? More like Unsureofdis.

Uncertain characters are also somewhat rare in Sonic's recurring cast (at least in the game universe), and just like with the previous point, even when they're there, they'll usually have something to counter it. Blaze may have been a bit insecure before meeting and befriending Sonic and Co, but as mentioned, she’s got a fierce temper, and even when she started off on her own, she felt that only she could take care of the threat of Eggman and Inferior Eggman Nega. Likewise, while Silver may have doubted himself about Leslie the Crack Dealer’s Iblis Trigger ruse cruise, he still got cocky when he had Sonic on the ropes, and he could be quite full of himself in the Rivals duology as well.

The point being, they still tend to show some semblance of the same “yep, I'm the one for the job, no questions asked” confidence and swagger that nearly everyone else has, no matter the flavor. Trudy, suffice to say, does not have this mentality. Trudy accepting Sonic and Co's help in dealing with sinister affairs in Viridonia without any haughty protest on her part isn't just because she knows they can handle it, or because they're Sonic Heroes and they'll show 'em the real superpower of teamwork... it's also because she's genuinely not sure if she would be able to take care of the matter on her own.

When she saved Cream from the wrath of the Wraith for example, she wasn't thinking “This looks like a job for Miss Hadeer!”

She was thinking “This could very well get me killed, but I have to help the poor bunny somehow...”

In other words, Trudy doesn't consider herself to be some sort of destined protector who has to do this herself. She constantly second guesses herself, and frequently believes her friends are more qualified and competent than she is. Her only reason for doing her best and helping out regardless is simply because she wants to.

3. A light at the end of the tunnel.

For the sake of tact, it's not shoved in your face relentlessly, but reading between the lines, it can be easy to get a sense of melancholy from Trudy. Particularly due to past experiences, she does indeed have an element of depression within her, and this can occasionally show in her body language and facial expressions, even if she's currently feeling positive emotions.

And yet, notice how she continues being a friendly pony. Notice how regardless of her experiences, and her thoughts on said experiences, her actual behaviour is (mostly) free of bitterness or cynicism, and that she doesn't hide the joy that her new friends make her feel. She's not outright ignoring her experiences or pretending they don’t affect her, because they clearly have affected her, and she's never ignored her scars (metaphorically and literally, the latter being a permanent side-effect of her condition), but she knows better than to let it consume her, so she tries her best to look at the bright side of life even during the darkest days.

It's Sonic's opinion that Trudy's inner spirit is a lot stronger than she thinks, with or without his help. Her refusal to give into misery and lash out at the world foreshadows that he's not unjustified in that belief. That, and it ties into the franchise’s usual taste for optimism and idealism against the odds.

4. Hadeer? More like Hadork.

So, everything thus far helps set Trudy up as a mellow, down-to-earth sort of personality. So far, so good. However, it's still the Sonic the Hedgehog universe we're talking about, filled with many colorful characters of all shapes, sizes, and eccentricities. When a franchise has a larger than life cast in a larger than life world, the characters who are meant to be grounded often risk coming off as boring and could end up easily overshadowed, because the creators or writers often neglect to give them any quirks of their own, usually out of fear that it'll disgrace the character's gracefulness. In fact, I personally feel this was a common problem with Sally, in both SatAM and Archie (mostly pre-reboot admittedly).

IMO, these writers are just being plain old silly. Just because a character is quirky doesn't mean they forfeit all their dignity altogether. Like a lot of things in life, you just have to balance it out, and that's what I did (or tried to do...) with the green equine.

So yes, Trudy is elegant, but she's also a really goofy dancer. Yes, she's gentle and motherly, but she also goes back and forth between being a heavy sleeper and being an insomniac. Yes, she serves as a warmhearted auntie figure for Cream (and a big sister figure for Amy), but she also spends a quarter of her time looking like a ninja with the way her bandana covers her face (whether it be due to cold weather, strong scents triggering her sensitive nose, or doing it in the presence of villains as a mildly theatrical way of visually conveying her disdain for them).

And of course, in the right situation, she can be just as much of a dork as the titular blue hedgehog is.

Which leads me to my next point...

5. “You might know everything I'm going to do...”

Trudy was created with the intention of having a character who is actually like Sonic himself in a lot of ways, but it's not apparent initially.

This sort of yin-yang contrasting routine has been done before a few times in the series, with Knuckles, Shadow and Blaze being the most obvious examples. But with them, their similarities are easier to spot from a distance. Knuckles is more earth than wind, but you can tell he's as stubborn as Sonic is. Shadow's methods and outlook differ, but you can tell he's still a mirror of Sonic (cause you know, he looks like him). Blaze is more distant, but you can tell how she can easily be just as worked up and angered as Sonic.

With Trudy however, if you take her at face value, you would think she's the exact opposite of Sonic. She's an introvert, he's an extrovert. She's got a calm temperament, he can get impatient even at the best of times. She's quite fancy, he's more rough and tumble. She takes things slowly, he leaps ahead without a care in the world... You would think that, outside of them both fighting for good, they would have nothing in common, and that their dynamic would be more akin to Sonic's relationship with Sally, which although they were friends, their relationship could often be somewhat rocky due to their differences in... basically every area and opinion imaginable.

But then you get to know Trudy, and the unfolding of the adventure reveals the rest of what she has to offer. The aforementioned soldiering on in spite of any depressed moments is in itself a small hint that Trudy shares Sonic's philosophy of never giving up. She believes that most people are good at their core, and while she won't excuse especially evil people or actions and will punish them appropriately (albeit with regret that it had to come to that), she's willing to give a chance to those who are willing to take it, just like with the Blue Blur. Not only does she NOT find Sonic's jokes and hijinks annoying, she actually has a similar sense of humor herself. And while reasonable people generally tend to loathe injustice and oppression, Trudy shares Sonic's uniquely intense contempt for it, and believes in one's own personal freedom just as much as the hedgehog does, let alone freedom in general.

In short, Trudy is what you get when you take Sonic's deeper qualities and general outlook on life, and apply them to a more introverted and taciturn personality. The exact same beliefs, but from a different perspective, so to speak.

6. A different kind of intelligence.

Tails and Eggman are the resident kings of scientific prowess in Sonic's world, and it goes without saying that I wouldn't want to do them a disservice by having Trudy one-up them in that department. But that doesn't mean your character can’t be talented in other areas, right? Contrary to what all those Mary Sue tests dictate, your character can in fact have a high IQ without intruding on an official character’s territory.

Therefore, Trudy is pretty good at innovation and craftsmanship in her own right, but whereas Tails and Eggman do it through technology, her field of expertise is more to do with arts and crafts, and to a lesser extent geology. For example, both her bow and her whip were crafted by the lady herself, using nothing but her decorative knowledge and flair.

Outside of that, she tends to know a fair bit about a lot of things in the world, largely attributed to her photographic memory, meaning she's bound to have a few answers no matter the subject of discussion. Granted, she's unlikely to be the absolute number one expert on any of those things, but she's at least a useful jack of all trades in that regard.

7. Feeling a little horse.

I very much approve and flat out adore the idea of Sonic characters having characteristics that remind the audience of what species they're supposed to be, so I made sure that Trudy had a wide selection of little mannerisms that would reveal her for the little horsie that she is. These include, but aren't limited to...

- When she’s fascinated or concerned by something, she’ll lean a little forward with her hands close to her chest, which subtly mimics the act of prancing.

- When she wakes up, she briefly stretches her arms and legs (albeit not too recklessly so as to risk straining her sensitive limbs).

- Her tail has a number of quirks. If she's happy, it might slowly swish to and fro. If she's REALLY happy, it might flick...

- And if she doesn't approve of someone or something, it might stiffen and raise a little bit, as if to helpfully inform the bad guys where they can kiss, if ya know what I'm saying.

- When she's being affectionate with her friends, she might give them the ol' nuzzle.

- When she's in a playful mood, there might be a little skip in her walk, the anthro equivalent of trotting.

- When she's annoyed, she might humorously let out a snort that sounds identical to a real life horse snort. And while she certainly doesn't neigh in the traditional sense, when she finds something hilarious or Sonic's making her laugh with his antics, her laughter can't help but take on a neigh-like touch to it. (The latter was actually a headcanon suggested by @darklightheart​, and I immediately agreed with it because it's cute and funny in equal measures.)

Naturally, she gets all shy and embarrassed when the neigh-laugh comes out, thinking it sounds silly. At least Sonic finds it endearing.

Note that I'm well aware that some of this differs from how real life horses react to certain things. (Eg: tail swishing tends to happen when a horse is agitated rather than happy.) But I freely admit that it's more for the sake of giving the character that extra bit of soul than it is for utmost accuracy. That's the way it goes with fiction sometimes. :P

Interestingly, Trudy tends to get Sonic indulging in a funny hedgehog characteristic of his own. That being, he might curl into a ball if Trudy's being particularly... ~complimentary~ towards him.

And there we are! These are the core elements that make up Trudy’s characterization. If you ever wanted a general list of what makes her tick, then hopefully this post will help in scratching that itch. And if it doesn’t, then hopefully it still proves that more thought was put into her than Scourge. :]

[icyxmischief]

Very old Loki headcanons from 2012!

It’s come to my attention that my blog has a whole link to headcanons that are ooooooold.  Most of them are still exactly what I think of Loki so I’m going to post them again here but remove the link, as my headcanons and meta tags are far more comprehensive! 

Please read however! :3 

Loki Headcanons, Character Motives, DiscussionThis list is BY NO MEANS EXHAUSTIVE. PLEASE REFER TO MY TAG “headcanons"

AND MY TAG “meta” FOR ALL DISCUSSIONS OF THIS CHARACTER.1.

Loki wears high-collared clothing even irrespective of battle armor (that is, all the time) because he knows that there is a place on each side of his neck that acts almost like a zen pressure point. If someone clasps his neck it has an odd quelling effect. As an inborn logistician, Loki does not want adversaries or even friends to have that kind of control over him, so he tries to shield access to his vulnerable spot. However, Thor frequently gains access anyway. There are in fact four separate “neck scruff” moments between them (one in “Thor,” in a deleted scene, and three in “Avengers”) and in each Loki is noticeably tranquillized, even, in some cases, dazed. Can you spot them?

2.

Loki’s D&D alliance has changed in the duration between “Thor” and “The Avengers” from Chaotic Good with his family and Lawful Neutral with his country/society, to Lawful Evil against both. He is a salvageable/redeemable character, though, who may revert to a state of “goodness” given enough time and compassionate acceptance. Loki is the epitome of the well-meaning but deeply misguided anti-hero.

3.

Loki’s Meyers-Brigg Personality is some bizarre mixture of Artisan, Rational, and Idealist. He is, at intervals a Composer and a Mastermind (INTJ), with a few notable emotional traits of the Healer (INFP). The only thing he is NOT is a Guardian. In the Harry Potter world, Loki would be a Slytherin with traces of Ravenclaw (he is, when lucid, very curious and cerebral).

4.

Loki is bisexual or perhaps pansexual. Or technically, assigning him a sexual orientation is pointless since he can change genders at will. In sexual relations, whether with a man or with a woman, Loki likes to be “on top” at the onset of the relationship. But with time and painstakingly gained trust, he prefers to be the vulnerable partner. He is capable of being a kind and caring lover, but his partner should be a deeply patient person who can expect a number of arguments based on his evasiveness, egotism, and sensitivity.

5.

Loki claims to be a trickster, to have no concrete ethical convictions, and to be playfully sadistic, but underneath this carefully crafted façade of whimsically cruel nonchalance—and it IS a conscious façade of “who gives a shit what you think, I’m wonderful!”—is a basically serious, somber, rigidly principled, and insecure being who forms ferociously loyal alliances to the people whom he loves. This odd mix of viciousness and sweetness makes Loki a frequently tragic being, as it opens him up for rejection on some level almost constantly. Loki is permanently and severely wounded when he perceives he has been wronged or betrayed (and Loki has very recently developed a bit of a persecution complex, so sometimes those wrongdoings are entirely imagined). He can be completely incapacitated by the belief that someone has been UNFAIR to him, getting emotionally and psychologically stuck on fanatically reliving the unfairness and plotting a way to exact justice. To compensate for a basically weak and insecure constitution, Loki adheres to forced, fanatical beliefs that don’t actually seem to reflect who he is. Doing so gives him psychological armor, however false, to hide behind, and buffers him against the fact that he is completely alone. For instance, his claimed conviction that “freedom is a lie” and “people are happiest when they have someone to bow down to” clashes deeply with his intrinsic role as a mischief-maker and free spirit and, despite his obviously genius-level I.Q., is bizarrely anti-intellectual. In short, Loki lies to himself to feel less terrified of his solitude and personal rejection by others. Engaging in a kind of double-think, he even fully believes his own lies and acts on them with sometimes atrocious results.

6.

Loki probably has a “godly” equivalent of one or more of the “Dissociative” disorders. This means that he has more than one discrete “personality.” Each personality (there are at least two) comes out erratically with little known trigger and sometimes is indistinguishable from the other except based on a tone of voice, type of laugh, or type of smile. Loki himself seems to be unaware of this shift of personalities and even slightly confused whenever a shift takes place. He then covers up the confusion with some bombastic display or arrogant declaration, but clearly is disturbed by the feeling of lost control. While this tendency is innate, and probably has a lot to do with being a Frost Giant made to masquerade as an Asgardian all his life, it was drastically exacerbated when Odin confessed Loki’s true heritage and insinuated that he kidnapped Loki from his real parents because Loki would one day prove a convenient political tool. At that point Loki realized he was entirely uncertain of his identity at all, and previously dormant personality traits awoke and vied for control. This confused selfhood is easily mistaken for some form of Bipolar Disorder, since Loki’s moods are volatile and change often. But it is not a true mood disorder because these emotional upheavals all directly derive from his confused sense of self and his uncertainty over how to deal with it. It is also confused with some rough equivalent of Paranoid Schizophrenia, but Loki is often too high-functioning and lucid to totally qualify for a Schizophreniform Disorder (although there are times that I honestly wonder). While in his childhood and youth he was calm, gentle, and reticent, Loki now exhibits pathologically narcissistic and histrionic traits, and he definitely has Borderline Personality Disorder: which is characterized by unstable personal relationships, an unstable sense of self, a tendency to “split” (lionize and demonize at sudden intervals in black and white terms) other people, and a need to deliberately test the patience of others in order to see how much he can “get away with” before he pushes them away and is abandoned.

All this has become instead a discussion of PTSD. 

7. (the big one)

Family for Loki is obviously a complicated issue, probably the most sensitive of all issues. It is in fact the issue from which all his pathological traits derive. Loki, or at least one of the “Lokis plural,” still loves his adoptive brother Thor dearly. But in the mess of everything that has happened (“it’s too late!”), in getting in far over his head with increasingly misguided efforts to be accepted and approved of, Loki no longer knows how to act around or relate to Thor. He also genuinely resents Thor for naturally being everything Loki tries, and fails, to be. He is deeply conflicted about his brother—hence actually talking to him without skewering him, then laughing as Tony Stark beats the shit out of him; hence gazing at him tenderly and crying, then dropping him out a steel trap or stabbing him. Despite all this, Thor is probably Loki’s best (perhaps only) hope for a normal relationship with another living person. Loki perennially seems to rediscover this fact and feel remorse about it. In his innermost self, Loki doesn’t want Thor to be hurt and he is grateful that Thor frets for and puts up with him. Loki probably loves Thor the most of his entire adopted family, since he was shown to defend Thor to their formidable-tempered father, and to counsel Thor against being injured by the Frost Giants (again, Loki USED to be the level-headed of the two brothers!). At the same time, a lifetime of living in Thor’s shadow had made Loki resentful enough by the middle of the film “Thor” to passively, and then quite actively, resist restoring his brother to Asgard. Loki also loves and misses his adoptive mother Frigg/Frigga and would be hard pressed to ever do her physical harm. The only person he completely hates in his adoptive family is his father Odin, though even that hatred is the inverse of having once devotedly adored the “All-Father.” In fact, Loki’s first great act of betrayal—to let the Frost Giants into Asgard and then set up a dimensional portal to commit genocide on his entire native race—was a desperate attempt to prove his love and loyalty to Odin, and to finally feel he had earned Odin’s love—genuine, not with practical perks— in return. He was unwilling to let anyone kill Odin, even though to do so would win him the throne of Asgard, and he proudly proclaimed himself a “son of Odin,” before Odin reiterated his relentless disappointment in Loki (“I could have done it, father, for you! For all of us!” “No, Loki.”). It was only at that point, suspended over a black hole between the dimensions, that Loki completely lost hope in earning Odin’s love. It was then, erroneously, that Loki decided love could not be earned, and had to be TAKEN. This is probably the root of his obsessive preoccupation with subjugating others. Significantly, that was the moment when Loki attempted to commit suicide, and when he survived, it was when he became a great deal more malicious.

8.

Loki is a very obstinate person once he gets into “the zone.” He will sacrifice devastating collateral as well as his own wellbeing in order to “win the game” or obtain what he craves. He is also a brilliant tactician, logistician, and strategist. He works in contingencies and despite being violently stubborn about his ultimate goal, will change courses dozens of times to reach it: chameleons change colors based on their environment and easily shed their skins, after all. As everything else, this ultimately goes back to his basic insecurity and personal confusion, and even a sense of self-loathing.

9.

Loki has several types of laughter that inform the observant person of when he is “lucid” or dangerous. His “real” and innocuous laugh is either a quiet, closed-lipped “HM!” or a calmly clucked series of “eh heh heh heh’”s. His “crazy” laugh is a loud, booming, arrogant, frantic, and abrupt guffaw often accompanied by tossing his head to and fro. Loki’s smiles also determine his mental states. A toothy grin is actually a sign that he is genuinely tickled. He is not aware of these tics, which is ironic, since he is such a fastidious student of other people’s giveaway habits and traits.

10.

Loki is a control freak and has a Napoleon Complex. Again, it comes from a combination of family issues and innate pathology. He hates to feel like he has lost control or had to give too much of himself unfairly to others because he spent his entire childhood and youth doing so to a dysfunctional extent in the vain hope of fitting in and being approved of by Asgardian society. For this reason, something as trivial as losing a chess game causes him to lash out in a resentful rage at the person to whom he has lost. It is not just losing a chess game to Loki; it is literally more evidence of his insufficiency and his unlucky destiny as a being who is constantly used and discarded. Other people frequently misinterpret this as evidence that Loki is greedy, and spoiled, and some crazy hormonal “Drama Queen.” In reality, Loki has no sense of self-preservation at all; he is reckless (whereas he once was very prudent) and sometimes the opposite of self-indulgent, and his violent tantrum-like response to loss of control has a much more tragic source.

11.

Loki hates the sensation of being cold and the sensation of being wet, but this is not because he cannot withstand these sensations; on the contrary the cold is his natural element, and the revulsion is entirely psychological. Both trigger recollections of his actual heritage as a Frost Giant, of which he is ashamed and disgusted. It doesn’t help that he is literally also a runt of his race. He in fact gets embarrassed showing strangers his blue skin and red eyes—unless of course he is in one of his more megalomaniacal states.

12.

Loki is a shape shifter and can change both genders and species, and frequently does so for shits and giggles. When he and Thor were children and Loki began to study sorcery to compensate for his physical smallness, he put on “changing shows” to make his brother laugh, especially when Thor was sad about something.

13.

Loki respects and is strangely fascinated by Tony Stark. In many ways he can relate to Tony, who is like a far saner, far less fanatical, version of him. Of all the “Avengers,” aside Thor, Tony is the individual who Loki can most tolerate. But Tony also makes him the angriest the fastest because Tony is so brilliant, insightful, and unflappable.  

14.

When Loki is very tired or dozes off lightly, and is not properly in bed, objects and living things randomly transform and shape shift under his half-conscious powers.

Loki also has difficulty waking up once he has fallen into a deep sleep.  It takes him forever to trust his environment enough to fall unconscious, and he hates that feeling of “total surrender,” but once he is asleep, he sleeps like a rock.  It is in fact directly after awakening, when still achieving a state of consciousness, that Loki is the most like his childhood self: quiet and gentle. He is also unusually impressionable in that state. When they were boys, Thor recognized this and was very protective of his little brother until Loki had fully awakened. This has not changed, but Loki is careful to be alone most of the time when he expects to rouse from slumber so that nobody witnesses it.

15.

We become what we are told we are, if we are told enough times. Loki, treated with almost a racist bigotry throughout his childhood, and suddenly exposed to the fact that he belongs to a race of hated monsters, believes himself to be an agent of chaos, pain, and subjugation. He believes he must be the equal and opposite foil to his brother. For life to continue, death must exist; for the earth to be fertilized and yield new life, bacterial agents must exact decay. What is tragic about this, and probably the reason for Loki’s obviously forced self-exultation, is the fact that more than anything, he wanted to be one of the agents of good, light, and order until it became clear to him that nobody would ever allow this—and now Loki embraces his role as the doer of dirty work, as the negative inverse in the eternal counter-balance of light and dark, gods and devils, and indeed, on some level, he plays a necessary role in the universe. But this was not what he originally wanted himself to be, and it is still not what he wants to be even now. This is a core reason for why he is jealous of and resentful toward Thor. Thor literally lives the life Loki wishes he could live.

16.

Loki actually enjoys taking the long route to victory. He foregoes easier and more certain methods to achieving his goals solely for the pure enjoyment of fabricating highly circuitous plots and watching them come to fruition with often delightfully surprising side developments that force him to use his wits and ingenuity in order to wriggle out on top. He is a thrillseeker, as most sociopaths are. It’s almost like tinkering with a motherboard to him—one that is plugged into an electrical outlet and could shock him at any moment if he makes the wrong move. He loves that sensation. In another life, he would actually make an excellent vigilante hero.

17.

When Loki was a child and ashamed of something, he would cast a spell that made him physically disappear and sit in dejected silence for hours. Only Thor could find him and convince him to become visible again. This is almost like a literal internalization of disempowerment, of the fact that he is constantly told to “shut up” or “know his place” by elders; even Thor snapped this at Loki once, in the “Thor” film, when Loki was only trying to convince Heimdall to let the group through the Bifrost, and when Loki was trying to keep Thor from being killed by Frost Giants.

18.

I am not sure whether or not I agree with this theory, but I will put it as a headcanon for now since it is well-thought-out: Loki originally formed an alliance with Thanos of the Titans thinking “cakewalk!” He was quickly proven wrong and got in over his head with the most dangerous being in the universe while making his bid for the chitauri. The plan, which Loki was now forced to carry out, was to cause the Avengers to assemble and to LOSE TO THEM PURPOSEFULLY (Loki never wanted to rule the “worthless” Midgardians anyway) to have an excuse for Thor to take him home to Asgard (which he still wants to conquer and refashion in his own image). Once in Asgard, Loki will fetch Thanos his payment for the use of the chitauri and the restoration to Asgard’s throne—by handing over the Infinity Glove/Gauntlet that is pictured as part of Odin’s treasury in the “Thor” film. At this point Loki’s feelings about ruling Asgard and harming his adoptive family are mixed, but he absolutely has NO CHOICE but to follow through (the Chitauri said “if you betray us there is no corner of any universe in which he [Thanos] cannot find you” and “you think you know pain? He [Thanos] will make you long for something so sweet as pain”). In the aftermath of this, what Loki will do remains to be seen or even guessed at. Many speculate that this is where his “redemption arc” will take place. In the duration, if “Thor 2” rumors are true, Loki will be either advising Thor against or machinating alongside an Asgardian sorceress and her allies. Probably the latter, as a way to execute his plans to get on the Throne of Asgard and get to the gauntlet that he owes Thanos.

19.

Sometime in the span of the Avengers franchise, possibly in Avengers 2 but probably not as early as Thor 2, Loki will in some way recant his crimes and redeem himself. I have not a clue how but too much effort was put into making him deeply sympathetic in the beginning for this to not take place. It will just be after he stirs up A LOT more shit (since he is technically a Marvel “big bad”). The person who will get through to him will be Thor. No doubt.

I personally am expecting one of the films to end with a teaser to the Journey Into Mystery comics arc, with a reborn child Loki.  

Well this happened, yay! lol. 

20.

Loki coveted his current wife Sigyn of the Vanir (the Norse Goddess of Fidelity) with his usual possessive and jealous nature, but he also killed and impersonated her fiance Theoric of the Crimson Hawks because Theoric was a controlling brute and Loki, who had taken time and effort to get to know Sigyn quite well, was moved by her bookish and intellectual temperament and her feelings of hopelessness and disempowerment (to which he could closely relate).  They are, as spouses, surprisingly gentle and tender, and they baby each other a lot.  Sigyn is no pushover, though her nature is quiet and introspective. Loki is a devoted father to his twin sons Vali and Narvi, which makes their ultimate fate in Norse mythology all the more tragic.

Headcanon directly derived from Tumblr user Asgardian-Spook.  <3 :)

21.

Loki is a quintessential Scorpio. His moon is in Cancer and his ascendant is Gemini.  

His birthday was November 14.  He is at least eight-nine hundred years old (the “Thor” film puts his infancy at around 965 A.D.).

22.

Pathological liar? Yes and no.

Loki is capable of sincerity unwaveringly in one form: when he cries. He cannot feign tears and crying is how constantly brewing intense emotions that he cannot quantify or qualify in his typically over-intellectual manner simply broil to the surface.  

No other form of deceit is beyond him to execute successfully, however. There is a reason why the God of Mischief is also sometimes called the God of Lies. He did not invent lying, but lying is closely tied to illusive endeavors and so he became proficient at it. It is also important to note that lying is not always a cruel or destructive force. It can be put to kind uses, in the form of sparing someone’s feelings by concealing hurtful truths, and when he was younger, Loki was known to do so.  Ironically, if he recognized that Odin, in his own destructively rigid way, was trying to do just that with respect to Loki’s Jotun heritage, it would have spared Loki himself a lot of heartache.

23. (how did Loki get from “Thor” to “Avengers”?)

As confirmed by Tom Hiddleston, the immensely skilled actor who portrays Loki in the Marvel films, when Hiddleston referred to a conversation with “Avengers” director Joss Whedon:

In the end of “Thor,” when Loki essentially attempted suicide and fell into a dimensional wormhole between the realms, a kind of liminal “seventh circle of hell” (Hiddleston’s words), the temporal flow was different than it is in the “real” world, and he spent years there in total solitude staring at stars and supernovas and black holes and reliving over and over how terribly awry his life had gone before becoming lost.  In this period Loki’s memories were severely distorted and he began to remember the last moments before he let go of Mjolnir’s handle in a warped way (for instance, he remembered Thor “throwing him” into the abyss rather than letting go himself while Thor frantically screamed his name, as he states in “Avengers”).

This was followed by being discovered by the Chitauri, who scried his most intimate thoughts and tortured him for sport and sent him to witness suffering and evil in every conceivable reality, realm, and universe (including earth, where he made contact with Eric Selvig and saw the Tesseract), and told him he was right in believing there was no value in freedom or love.  

At this point Loki completely snapped. He bargained retrieval of the Tesseract for release onto Midgard, which the Chitauri were to, in turn, help him conquer.  After contacting Thanos, the Chitauri agreed to this. Loki decided this was a win-win. Either he would rule Midgard and finally be a rightful king just like his brother and force his way into Asgard to get the Infinity Gauntlet for Thanos, OR he would fail, and be taken back to Asgard as a prisoner, and stillget the Infinity Gauntlet for Thanos.

This explains many things about Loki. It explains why he was so sickly and gaunt when he returned to earth, as well as so much more markedly insane and cruel.  It explains his belief in himself as some savior-pariah: “Freedom is life’s greatest lie” because the freedom to aspire as an individual is also the freedom to fail, to be found wanting, to be thought inferior: just as Loki himself was found inferior by his family and society.  So essentially, Loki’s raison d’etre is a kind of warped and twisted megalomaniacal “philanthropy.” As Hiddleston put it, “Every villain is a hero in his own mind.”

Addendum: Because of this purgatorial experience in outer space, twilight and evening, and the appearance of a clear starry night sky in general, cause Loki to become nervous and depressed, though almost no one is aware of this.

24.

Loki finds rain and thunderstorms relaxing and uplifting, even in spite of himself.

The reasons are obvious even to him. <3

25.

When Loki is extremely emotionally agitated, to calm himself, he either cups his own neck with his hands, or he jiggles his left hand at his side frantically.

26. Everything Loki and Sigyn can be found in this post: http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/32629880715/logyn-headcanons-master-post-mostly-sweetdreamr-for

27. Everything Loki and Tony (not a pairing, but a character comparison) can be found in these posts, which I will add to as time permits:

http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/33117237448/tony-and-loki-are-alike-and-different-1

http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/33125946272/tony-and-loki-are-alike-and-different-2

http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/33129217327/tony-and-loki-are-alike-and-different-3

http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/33130071948/tony-and-loki-are-alike-and-different-4

28. The following post is a proposed list of Loki’s internal monologue during the film “Thor,” since we all know how labyrinthine his mind is, and how often he changes his course: http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/35072821755/strategy-shift-ok-im-actually-curious-and-i-think

29. I was asked by a follower to compare Loki to Magneto and this post is what I came up with: http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/35374292652/loki-vs-magneto

30: Loki and the Body Politic (an essay by another writer that encapsulates many of my beliefs) : http://pleasantvilles.tumblr.com/post/54144354420/chaos-theory-on-lokis-experience-of-embodiment

31: MY THEORY OF THOR 2: http://icy-mischief.tumblr.com/post/55192114069/so-what-do-i-think-will-happen-in-thor-2-you-ask

[iris-sistibly]

4R’s: Encantadia Season 2 (April 10, 2017 episode review)

Iris-message: As announced by GMA Encantadia on Twitter, we’re only going to have three episodes this week, so the week-ender episode will definitely be on Wednesday, as you all know it’s lenten, and Holy Thursday, Good Friday and Black Saturday will be our time to reflect and re-connect with our own Emre, our beloved God. Fam bam and I are prolly gonna do the usual stuff, Visita Iglesia, Station of the cross, the usual stuff, and I would most probably re-watch the Ten Commandments because I love that movie so much or the Prince of Egypt maybe. So in advance, may our long weekend be a meaningful one!

Episode 191

Recap:

How to fake it

Ybrahim started to throw a shade at Avria, Hagorn and Asval, but before this turns into a nasty, deadly match, Alena “humbled” herself and apologized on Ybrahim’s behalf. The peace talk continued, with Danaya trying to convince Avria that they have really come for peace. To be able to do that, Avria demanded to surrender all of the gems in their possession to her. Danaya assured that they aren’t going to use the gems against them, but Avria did not believe, she is fully aware that the diwatas do not trust her and vice versa. Avria ended the talk and told them to meet her in the battle field but Danaya stopped her and finally gave her what she wanted—the brilyante ng lupa. Ybrahim strongly opposed but Danaya stood firm on her decision and handed the gem over to Avria, but the latter also demanded for the remaining gems, Alena was ready to surrender hers if Avria vows not to hurt any encantado, and stop their evil schemes against Lireo in general, Avria told her she will think it over and did not get the water gem, at this point, Avria was convinced that Danaya was “sincere” of her desire for peace, the talk ended successfully.

Hearing the news about Alena, Danaya and Ybrahim going to Etheria to bargain made Pao Pao, Muyak and Ariana worried. Pao Pao knew Avria won’t settle for peace unless the sang’gres hand over the gems to her. The monarchs returned to Lireo, everyone was waiting for Danaya to spread the news. Rehav Manik assured that the Punjabwes are going to fight on their side, but Danaya told everyone that no war is going to take place, for she has surrendered the earth gem to Avria and this made the Etherian queen agree for a ceasefire. Though the talk was a success, Ybrahim was still worried, everyone knows that Etherians will never keep their promise and feared for that day when they will all be mercilessly killed. This had everyone worried as well, Alena shut Ybrahim and everyone up and asked the rest except the monarchs to leave them for awhile. Now that only Danaya, Alena, Imaw and Ybrahim were left, it was now time to tell the truth, Alena made a shield out of her water gem to make sure no one else will hear, Danaya revealed that she created an exact replica of her earth gem and the fake one was handed over to Avria, she also made sure that the replica works just like the real earth gem to make Avria believe that it is really Danaya’s brilyante. Ybrahim apologized and commended Danaya for coming up with that scheme, but he knew Avria is going to discover the truth eventually, Danaya could only hope by the time it happens, Emre and Cassiopeia has already succeeded with their mission.

To make him smile again

Ybrahim was studying the map of Encantadia, apparently he still wanted to seek revenge on Etheria, Ariana found him and told him how relieved she was that he made it back safely, Ybrahim asked her why, Ariana bluffed and told him that she doesn’t want him to get hurt but it only made Ybrahim ask more questions, Ariana and Ybrahim would have been placed in another awkward moment if Alena didn’t come, Ybrahim excused himself and told Ariana to call it a night. Alena had the chance to talk to Ariana, she had been listening to her conversation with Ybrahim and decided to confront the Punjabwe-a, Alena asked Ariana if she was in-love with Ybrahim, and although Ariana gave her an indirect answer, Alena knew she harbors feelings for the king. Alena is the most sensitive and observant among the sisters thus she knew that Ariana feels something for Ybrahim from the way she looks at him, to the way she acts towards him. Ariana apologized and made it clear that she doesn’t have any plans on stealing him from Alena, but Alena told her that everything between her and Ybrahim has long been ended, and all she ever wants is for him to be happy, thus Alena asked Ariana to make him fall in-love with her, Ybrahim has been through so much pain and Alena wants to see the man she once loved smile again, and the key she believes is Ariana.

The golden hourglass

Amarro and Lila Sari did not hesitate to reveal where Avria got her powers from, but Pirena already knew that and wanted to know where her army came from instead. Amarro and Lila Sari told her about the golden hourglass that Avria used along with the gems to help Etherians travel to the present time. The hourglass is a powerful tool that makes anyone travel from one timeline to another (or turn back time), Pirena became interested at this in hopes to turn back to the time when Mira needed her help the most, unfortunately, only Avria knows where it is. Pirena immediately came up with a plan but before leaving, she told Lila Sari and Amarro that Deshna is in Adjantao, a place Hagorn chose to hide the child. It was a lie, and Pirena had to do it because she’s still going to use her sister against Hagorn.

Meanwhile in Etheria, Hagorn suspected something about Danaya surrendering the earth gem wasn’t right, Asval set those thoughts aside but Hagorn has a point, the sang’gres aren’t stupid to hand over the gems without coming up with a plan. Asval’s suspicions rose, a Hathor came and whispered something to Hagorn, he left Asval who was still pondering over Hagorn’s words. Asval went to Avria and told her his doubts, to be able to confirm, Avria tested the gem out, it unleashed power, something that fake ones can’t. Avria was very certain she has the real earth gem.

The former king of Hathoria found out that Pirena was outside the Etherian palace, Pirena immediately asked Hagorn a favor to help her, Pirena wanted to enter the palace without anyone noticing. At first, Hagorn did not want to but Pirena threatened to tell Lila Sari where Deshna is which forced Hagorn to grant her request. Pirena made it inside, Hagorn warned her that he will be the one to punish her in case she gets caught. Pirena thanked her father and proceeded with her plan.

Rave/s:

💚 YES ALENA! Out of everything she has done, I think that one thing that makes me really proud of her character is that she has finally moved on (take note of the word, “MINSAN”) she has been through a lot of pain, she made mistakes in the past but in the end, she did not let her anger take control of her, she has grown so much from being a pabebe sang’gre, to a vengeful mother, to a confidently beautiful woman with a heart, and I couldn’t be more proud as an encantadik, I think she has the most beautiful character transition out of all other characters, her heart was once her Achilles’ heel, but look at her now! And I love how Gabbi is portraying the character these past few weeks, although it took a really long time, but I really have to say that she succeeded on merging her own personality with Alena’s. She has finally connected with her character, she herself witnessed everything Alena went through and this led her to finally understand and dig deeper into the character, and for that I am truly, genuinely proud of Gabbi. If I could hug Alena right now I swear I will do it and I’ll tell her how she makes me proud every single day, I hope everyone feels the same, every Alena fan, every AleBarro/YbraLena fan, every GabRu fan, let Alena be, because nothing is more satisfying than knowing your self-worth. Nothing is more awesome than to finally tell yourself that, “Finally, it’s over.” She chose to be free and she got it, now all I want is for her to find that true happiness and get that one precious thing she always wanted, someone who can give her the love she has been searching. Kebs na kung beauty and the Beast ang peg, let’s give AleMemfes a chance. Let’s give Gabbi a chance to prove that she is the next ultimate leading lady! Wish you luck Gab and Lance!

💛 DAYUM DANAYA YOU DA QUEEN! I love how this show redeemed itself from their “unacceptable” episodes for the past two weeks, the battle of who’s smarter, who’s better is definitely on! Love you queen, this show is finally telling everyone that it is not only Pirena who knows how to think.

🌷 Because I love this week-starter in general, I’m not gonna rant about anything. Y’all probably know that I’m still gonna shoot fires at Arra’s performance, BUT, I decided not to do that because I don’t wanna break my own bubble and lash out at Arra [again], I felt like I’m already getting used to her shitty performance, or maybe I’m not in the mood? Whatever!  Acting-wise I am still uncertain and unconvinced that Arra deserves the role, but narrative-wise this is how it should be. Set aside all of your anger towards Ariana and focus on the story itself, remember Amihan’s sarkosi is inside Ariana’s body so technically Ariana is still Amihan, although her characterization is inconsistent as fuck, I would still go for this route but I do NOT agree with the making Ybrahim fall for Ariana part, I mean sure they feel some sort of connection with each other, but I would rather let them discover and realize their feelings for each other in a slow-burn kind of way than “forcing themselves to each other,” god! Amihan will never do such thing even if she loves her man so much. Duh. So you know, I’ve been really, really ranting about Arra and Ariana lately, and it’s no surprise to you guys, but you see, I’m already fed up at making the same old comments all over again, I feel like it’s pathetic how I’m stressing myself over an actress whom I’m not sure if she can really act. I had the chance to go over my previous reviews from last week and last, last week, and I just realized that rooting for Arra is just…pointless, and me ranting endlessly about her wouldn’t change the fact that they chose her to play the character, I mean they already chose her so they gotta stand up on their decision, panindigan nila ‘yan. Now before you react, let me just make myself clear, I’M TIRED AT HATING ON ARIANA, I’m sick at blabbing shits about Arra, and I’m so done at lambasting her story, telling everyone her story should be like this and that. I’VE HAD ENOUGH OKAY? I wanna stop because I have to, I hate being stressed, and Arra is my source of stress, so I have to get her out of my nerves dude, it’s bad for my health! I have come to this point where I am already starting to “accept” that Ruru’s going to do all the hard work for the rest of this whole Ybriana “romance”, and the only thing that’s gonna save Arra’s face in the show is the Amihan/Kylie flash backs, okay, noted. I’m just going to give all the hopeless chances on her, and take note, I repeat, those are “HOPELESS chances,” that means I no longer care, let her do her thing, I’m not expecting anything, period. If she does impress, good, I’ll rave about her, and if not, then I guess I’m just gonna sarcastically thank her forever for annihilating what would have been Amihan’s second shot at life, and until Arra proves me wrong, I am not going to see Ariana and Amihan as one character.

Rant/s:

No rants so far.

I’m really happy at Alena and Danaya’s progresses and I’m not gonna let a few minutes of crap ruin it! Nuh-uh.

Best performer/s for this episode: Gabbi Garcia 🌊

Rating: 9 out of 10💎s

Photo credits: From Twitter: @GMAEncantadia (Encantadia 2016-2017 official twitter acct) @gmanetwork (GMA Network); official website: gmanetwork.com @GMADrama (GMA Drama)

From Facebook: Encantadia 2016; official website: encantadia.com.ph

Video credits: GMA Network via YouTube & dailymotion

[ciathyzareposts]

Challenge of the Five Realms: Summary and Rating

Notice how the box has little scenes from each of the five realms.

             Challenge of the Five Realms: Spellbound in the World of Nhagardia

United States MicroProse (developer and publisher, under its Microplay label)

Released 1992 for DOS

Date Started: 2 November 2019

Date Ended: 31 December 2019

Total Hours: 35

Difficulty: Easy-Moderate (2.5/5)

Final Rating: (to come later)

Ranking at time of posting: (to come later)

Summary:

Challenge of the Five Realms is a plot-heavy axonometric title set on the flat world of Nhagardia. A prince must race against a creeping darkness to retrieve the five crowns of Nhagardia’s five kingdoms (human, gnome, elf, fish-man, and effete flying man), whose leaders have been killed by the mysterious, demonic Grimnoth. The game is as full-featured as anything in 1992, with animated cut scenes and voiced digital dialogue at the beginning and end. There are hundreds of NPCs, dozens of side quests, and a book’s worth of dialogue. Many of the NPCs may join the party, which maxes at 10. The tactical combat system works relatively well. But the game lacks in other key role-playing areas, particularly character development. *****

Challenge of the Five Realms is easily the best game from the team that previously created the Paragon Software adaptations of Games Designers’ Workshop (GDW) titles, including the two MegaTraveller games, Space 1889, and Twilight: 2000. This suggests that either the GDW games were fertile practice ground or the development team did better without GDW fetters, or perhaps both.

However, Challenge is far from a perfect title, and at least one of its weaknesses was seen likewise in the GDW adaptations: almost no character development. Characters enter the party as full adults with long careers behind them. You may choose, keep, or reject them because of their attributes and skills, but you don’t expect those attributes and skills to get better during the game–at least not in any consistent, understandable way. Some skills increase not at all, a few increase by 3 or 4 points, and a couple increase by 50 points. That’s a Paragon game if I ever heard one.

It’s too bad because the game is quite strong on other RPG mechanics, including combat and side quests, but Challenge really drives home how an RPG player like me only cares about those things in the context of character development. Take away the reward, and I don’t really care if the old woman gets her wedding ring back or not. The economy and inventory systems are likewise a bit of a mess, meaning that not even they compensate for a lack of intrinsic character development.

There are a few other flaws that don’t entirely cripple the game but come close. The time limit is employed badly. The limit itself is fairly generous, and it’s hard to imagine a moderately conscientious player running afoul of it. The problem is that the “creeping darkness” slowly eats the map from the bottom up, so that your time constraints are a lot more urgent for the locations in the south The various towns and castles in Nhagardia are all interesting in appearance and character, and it’s a shame to have to rush through them. It’s equally a shame to reduce replayability by forcing the player to prioritize the southern locations; without the “creeping darkness,” the game would be satisfyingly non-linear.            

What happens if you miss the time limit.

            I have a feeling that this is going to GIMLET in the extremes, with several high scores and several low scores.

1. Game World. The setting, backstory, and plot are all strong. I like the way that each kingdom has its own character, and the people have their own values. In the human kingdom, each town and castle has its own story to impart. I love the slow reveal of the depth of Clesodor’s evil. The twists at the end didn’t do as much for me, but at least they brought the whole thing to a proper conclusion. Someone really wrote this one. Score: 7.                 

Grimnoth lays out the charges against my father. All of this was unknown at the beginning of the game.

             2. Character Creation and Development. If the old Paragon develops should have kept anything from their GDW experience, it was the Traveller-style character creation process that puts the character through a wringer of training and experience before shoving him out the door and into your party. Instead, the authors opted for an Ultima IV-style process of answering role-playing questions to determine the main character’s starting skills and attributes. Other characters come as they are.

Unfortunately, where the creators’ GDW experience comes through the most is in the lack of character development. No explanation is given for why some skills (“Learn Spells,” “Bargaining”) increase steadily with use while others (including all the combat skills) don’t increase at all. It is a depressing oversight that nearly strips the game of its RPG credentials entirely. Score: 2.             

Chesotor ended the game hardly better than where he started.

          3. NPCs. Challenge undoubtedly offers more NPC speech than any previous game. It isn’t quite “dialogue,” though. Except for a small number of yes/no responses, the game speaks for the characters, and thus the NPCs’ speeches are more like information dumps than anything approaching “role-playing.” Beyond that, the attention to NPC characterization is excellent, as is the general quality of the text.

Even more fun is the sheer number of NPCs who will join your quest. You have a generous party size (10) and at least three times that number of potential members, including the novel idea of “grouped” party members. For the first time that I remember in RPG history, your NPC companion have bits of banter as you enter areas, talk to other NPCs, and solve quests. My only complaint is that dismissed companions utterly disappear from the game instead of going back to where you acquired them (or to a central location). Score: 6.          

The NPCs in this game were interesting, but man did they have a lot to say.

         4. Encounters and Foes. Weak again. Almost all of the combat foes are people, with very little to distinguish them or to change player tactics. There are no puzzles beyond simple inventory puzzles. However, the game does excel in what I call “contextual encounters.” Nhagardia is not a land swarming with monsters that you must mindlessly kill; every combat is set in a context, usually with some preceding dialogue, so you always know who you’re fighting and why. Score: 3.

5. Magic and Combat. Ironically, the old Paragon team finally fielded a decent combat system in a game that only has about a dozen battles. It’s hard to characterize the exact nature of the system. It looks somewhat like “real-time with pause” except that it only appears “real-time” and there are actually turns at fixed intervals behind the scenes. Either way, whether the player micromanages the combat by issuing new orders every round or just relies on “quick combat,” the mechanics and tactics are generally satisfying.

Spells are another matter. The spell system is primarily used for puzzle-solving (woe is the character who lacks “Truth,” in particular) and travel. Combat spells are a bit under-developed. There are no area-effect spells and only a couple of buffing spells. Magic depletes so quickly that you can only cast a few spells in any given combat anyway, which makes it jarring to have so many endgame enemies that don’t respond to physical weapons. Again, the developers’ lack of experience (none of the GDW properties were fantasy RPGs) shows here. Score: 4.            

Fighting some peregrines.

         6. Equipment. Another weak area. The game has slots for a lot of different equipment types, but I only ever found a few rings, one item of headwear, and a couple of pairs of boots. There are maybe three magic items to find during your adventures, but beyond that the roster of weapons and armor is no different than the starting store in a typical D&D-derived game. Score: 2.

7. Economy. The economy is so favorable to the player that I think it might be bugged. From the moment the game began, I spent blithely whenever anyone asked for money, and I never seemed to lack any. Of course, there isn’t a lot to spend money on. All shops of the same type sell the same things, and you can get most of your equipment in the starting castle. Score: 2.

8. Quests. If you can say one thing for the Paragon team, they’re one of the only groups of developers in this period that truly understands “side quests.” Every map area has a bunch of Joe Commoners with their own problems that they’re hoping that the characters will solve. These side quests are rewarded with gold, spell reagents, equipment, and the availability of new NPCs. Some of the quests even have multiple options for ending them, usually favoring one town faction over another.

Meanwhile, the main quest and its various stages are equally compelling. An open question is whether it would be possible to complete the game by murdering each king for his crown. Score: 6.

9. Graphics, Sound, and Interface. The graphics are very good for the era, and I particularly like the title cards that precede each map. Sound effects, on the other hand, are a bit too sparse. There are no background sounds, and only the occasional effect during combat.

The interface is horrid. Keyboard backups for the most common commands don’t help much when you have to move exclusively with the mouse. The process of hailing and talking to NPCs is needlessly complex and inconsistent. After 35 hours, I still can’t give a good account of it. Sometimes, you have to both “Hail” and “Speak” and other times you just seem to have to walk near an NPC to get him to start talking. Sometimes, the speech cursor remains active and you can keep clicking on other NPCs, and sometimes you have to start over. Sometimes dialogue exits on its own and sometimes there seems to be no way to exit. Once or twice, I literally had to reload the game.           

The multiple inventory screens added needless complexity to what should have been a simple process.

          The inventory interface is also needlessly cumbersome. The idea of a single chest shared by all characters is great. Beyond that, each character simply needed an individual “wearable” inventory. Instead, each character has his own pouch, backpack, and non-specific “inventory” space in addition to the wearable inventory and collective chest. Also, the process of removing and replacing things in the chest could have been quicker. The interface issues were so consistently annoying that they weaken the entire category score despite the good graphics. Score: 2.

10. Gameplay. As previously discussed, the game would be wonderfully non-linear if the team hadn’t forced the player to prioritize the southern locations. Even with that weakness, there’s still a lot of non-linearity to the game, which enhances its replayability. The length and challenge are about right. We thus finish on a strong category with only minor complaints. Score: 7.

The final score thus adds up to 41, well above the “recommended” threshold. I thought it would out-perform all of the Paragon games, but it turns out I gave the same score to MegaTraveller 2, which had many of the same strengths and weaknesses.

I don’t know what was happening at Computer Gaming World in the fall of 1993, but the lukewarm review (by Gordon Goble, who I’ve never seen before) is the worst one that I’ve seen in the magazine since its first few issues. It’s like it didn’t even pass the eyes of an editor. (Among other things, Goble makes reference to “Darth Vadar.”) It’s full of pretentiousness, non-sequiturs, dumb jokes, senseless allusions, and tired cliches. He spends several paragraphs complaining that he attacked some random NPC, and that NPC turned out to be harder to defeat than would make sense. His concluding paragraph references “inadequate beta testing” and “a certain awkwardness to gameplay” that aren’t justified by any of his previous text. Gods know what editor was asleep at the wheel for this one, but I certainly hope this is the last we’ll see of this writer.

There must have been something in the water that month, because Dragon magazine’s three-star pan is equally baffling in different ways. The author’s enjoyment is far too influenced by what he or she sees as plot holes (“Why the evil fellow simply can’t take the crown after he kills the king makes no sense”), as if any fantasy RPG of the period holds up to the most cursory plot scrutiny.

As we previously covered, Challenge was the first RPG from the old Paragon Software team after the company was acquired my MicroProse. The team included Marc Miller, F. J. Lennon, Paul M. Conklin, and Quinno Martin. For some members, this was their last RPG. Others contributed to MicroProse’s BloodNet (1993), which uses a similar interface, before leaving MicroProse for Take-Two Interactive. BloodNet will be our last MicroProse title and the last of the Paragon legacy. Hopefully, by then I’ll have been able to get in touch with one of the team’s principal developers and get some insight as to why this series, though innovative, always slightly missed the mark.

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