synagri-blog-blog

[kingdomsaurushearts]

Heavy debate on just deleting everything and Peace-ing Out.

[logansdoll]

heat

part two of "cottontail"

CW: SMUT, SMUT, SMUT, heavily suggestive, profanity, bunny mutation + spring = fun times, girl imma do my best, this took forever, might be a little long, etc.

As much as he hated to admit it, Logan was worried about you.

In his two-hundred years of living, he had never met someone as hot-headed and brash as you—and that was saying something. But as your you-appointed new best pal, he resigned himself to making sure you didn't piss off the wrong people.

Though it was a nice change of role, seeing as he wasn't the loose canon for once, he couldn't help but begin to grow significantly concerned for your safety.

It wasn't that you were a bad person, far from it, in fact.

Always greeting him with a sweet mornin', Logan!

Always checking up on him after missions.

Always inviting him to "sparring sessions", which would inevitably turn into you two striking up conversation about anything and everything under the sun.

Not to mention you were a humongous flirt—Jean called it being "overly friendly".

She noted that you didn't flirt with any other guys like you did him.

You always gave him those cheeky smiles that seemed to irk him to no end, and put that flirty lilt in your voice when you spoke. Not to mention the constant compliments, which would stick with him for days, sometimes weeks.

But that all stopped about a week ago.

After a day of you acting incredibly off—no jokes, no laughter, little talking—Ororo said you suddenly came down with a "spring cold", but that you'd be up and at 'em soon.

Well, soon hadn't come yet, and Logan hadn't heard anything from you in days.

A spring cold couldn't last this long...

Was it the flu? Was it something else?

And why did everyone else seem so unbothered by it?

These thoughts swam in his head every time he passed your locked door.

Until he finally had enough.

The night everyone went out for a field trip to the county fair, Logan stayed back, opting to visit your quarters with a few choice words, and a container of chicken noodle soup.

When he reached your door, he gave it a soft rap.

Nothing happened.

He tried again.

Still nothing.

Only after a third—more aggressive—knock, did you finally answer.

"Yeah?" you called, your voice low and croaky.

He'd never heard you sound so defeated, and almost... pained.

It made something pang in his chest.

"That must be some cold," he quipped, attempting to play off the feeling with humor.

"Logan?" you asked, sounding shocked. "What are you... What do you want?"

"I just came to give you some soup. Jean told me it's good," he answered, glancing down at the bag in his hand. "S'been a while since I've heard from you."

He waited for a response, but when you never gave one, he began to feel stupid.

This was a mistake.

"Look, I can just leave it outside the door if you don't wanna—"

"No," you interrupted, still sounding strained. "You can come in. Just leave it on my dresser."

A little confused by your tone, he entered nonetheless, boots clicking against the hardwood.

And what he found was concerning.

Your room was a mess—furniture askew, clothes and empty water bottles discarded on the floor, a rumpled mess of sheets on the bed.

The smell in the air was thick with sweat and something else. He looked toward the king-sized bed where a heap sat hunched underneath the sheets

"(y/n)?" Logan called, brows furrowed with confusion and worry as he placed the bag on the dresser.

"Don't come over here!"

You sounded so distressed, in such discomfort.

What's going on?

Why did you sound like you were in trouble?

Ignoring your warning, he slowly stalked closer to the bed, taking slow, tentative steps—now able to hear your soft whimpers and grunts of pain.

"(y/n)?" he questioned, firmly.

You stirred, reacting to his voice, breathing raggedly as if you couldn't get any air in your lungs.

"(y/n), what the hell is going on?" he demanded. "Whatever it is, I can help."

But you turned away, the sheets shifting with you.

"You can't," you whined, "You can't."

Patience running thin, Logan stormed over and snatched the sheets off of you. And there, under the covers, he saw you with his own two eyes.

You were curled into yourself, tail significantly fluffier than he remembered, and ears droopier than he'd ever seen.

Through your thin tank top, he could see your nipples were hard and perky, the shorts you were wearing barely covering your ass cheeks.

'Goddamn...'

When you looked at him, your face flushed red, pupils dilated beyond belief as you covered your face with embarrassment.

You trembled in your skin, tail twitching with discomfort and unease.

"I told you not to come over here," you panted, curling further into yourself. "Didn't want you to see me like this..."

You winced, squeezing your thighs together tight, looking to be in complete agony.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"I'm in heat," you sighed, the cat pretty much out of the bag. "S'cause of my mutation. I can do everything a rabbit can, and go through everything a rabbit goes through. No matter how fucking stupid."

You wiped the sweat off your forehead, your curly hair soaked in it.

"S'why I've been hiding," you explained. "I've been tryna get through this, but I just... can't!"

Now he understood.

Your absence, your uneasiness, the smell of something in the air.

You were horny.

"How long's it last?" Logan curiously asked.

"Depends. Could be a week, could be a month..."

"A month?" he stated, surprised. "Are you in pain?"

Your face screwed tight, triggering something in his core.

"Yes," you groaned, hugging yourself closer.

You looked away from him, appearing so utterly humiliated and ashamed that it pained him.

He had to help.

"What can I do?" he suggested.

You turned to him, eyes widening. "What?" you asked. "What do you—"

"I wanna help you, cottontail," he cut in, already kicking off his boots and taking off his leather jacket to reveal his sexy, white wife-beater. "So tell me what I gotta do."

You watched him, looking completely stunned and mortified, but your pussy throbbed at the sight of his outfit.

"No, no, Logan," you protested. "Y-You can't... you don't need to do this."

But he stood firm in his decision, refusing to leave you.

"I know I don't need to," he firmly responded. "I can't let you go on like this."

"It's okay..." you assured. "It'll probably be done by the end of the week. You don't—"

Before you could even finish, his hand grabbed your face, pulling you close and squeezing your cheeks, his tone demanding.

"Don't protest. Don't argue. Don't push me away... Just let me take care of you, alright?"

His gorgeous brown eyes, filled with the promises of safety and acceptance, bore into yours.

How could you deny him?

"Okay," you caved, leaning into his touch.

"Good girl," he cracked a smile, lips suddenly swooping yours up in a firm kiss.

You let out a soft, eager moan as he scooped you up in his arms, the man letting out a quiet chuckle when you squeaked, your feet dangling off the ground.

While still kissing you, he sat himself down on the bed and plopped you in his lap. His soft lips and tongue made you squirm in his lap, brushing yourself against his quickly hardening cock in his jeans.

"Can I touch your ears?" he whispered, breathless. "'N' your tail?"

Gently, his hand moved down to your ass, caressing your cotton tail. Your toes curled, your body tingling from the sensation.

"Y-Yes," you shakily replied. "Go ahead."

And when his fingers began to lightly brush and stroke your bunny ear from base to tip, you nearly had a full body orgasm, your pussy growing wetter with each pass.

"Fuck..." you gasped. "Yes, just like that..."

Logan smirked as he watched your face contort in pleasure, his ego growing with each whimper.

"Like that?" he asked, teasingly, his cock throbbing at the sound of your pitiful whine in response.

Over these past few months, he'd had countless dreams about having you just like this. And now that he was, he could say with certainty that it was far better than any fantasy.

Gently, one of his big hands slid down between your thighs to pet your pussy through your panties, while the other continued to stroke your ears.

Your mouth fell agape, pleasure coursing through you.

"Oh, fuck," you moaned, tilting your head back as his fingers ghosted over your clit.

You began to shamelessly grind your pussy into his fingers, turning Logan on even more.

"Needy little thing..." he chuckled, amused. "Adorable."

Under his firm gaze and insistent fingers, you nearly came apart at the seams. But before you could, he pulled away, scooping you up with one arm, much to your surprise and arousal, and sliding himself further down the bed.

With a grin, he dropped his head into the pillows, shifting and forcing you to hover over his face.

"M'gonna taste you, now," he stated, as if it was a fact.

You whined in response, moving to grab the headboard as he pulled your panties to the side, giving your pussy a quick peck before completely dropping you on top of him.

"Logan!" you half-moaned, half-screamed, eyes blown wide with pleasure.

You tried to brace yourself, but it wasn't long before he made you a writhing, whimpering, whining mess.

"Ah, Lo, yes!" you cried. "Oh, fuck! Right fuckin' there! Right fuckin' there!"

You were loud and vocal, much to his enjoyment.

He was having the time of his life, massaging your ass and sucking your wet pussy, your juices dripping down his chin.

He even groaned and grunted into your pussy about how good you tasted, only making you wetter at seeing such a stoic man lose his shit over you.

"You want a finger, baby?" he growled, voice slightly muffled. "Talk to me. Tell me what chu want."

"Please," you whimpered. "Fuck me, Logan! Make me come!"

Logan smiled, slowly inserting one of his thick fingers into your hole while his lips gently sucked on your clit.

You nearly screamed, bawling at the pleasure.

"Oh, my God!" you sobbed. "Shit, Logan, I'm gonna... I'm gonna.."

Your orgasm slammed into you without a second thought, drawing a string of slutty moans out as you came all over Logan's tongue.

"That's my good girl," he smirked into your pussy. "So fuckin' good f'me."

Your orgasm was so strong that you began to tremble, the aftershocks taking over your body.

The release helped with the pain... but it still wasn't enough.

You needed more.

Suddenly, he took hold of your chin, staring into your eyes as if he could peer right into your head.

"Do you want more?" he asked, cockily.

Slowly, you nodded, tears pricking your eyes at how much to needed this.

"Yes, Logan," you pleaded, your arousal making you bold and unashamed in your need to be fucked. "Please give it to me. I don't care how you take me. Just please..."

That was all he needed to hear.

He gave you exactly what you wanted and more. The man fucked you, and he fucked you good. He gave your little body everything it needed to knock out those horny thoughts and relieve you of your heat.

In almost every position, too.

He fucked you in missionary while standing up, his hips pistoning into yours while your feet dangled in the air, his hands pinning your thighs apart and making you take each deep, long, slow stroke that had you seeing stars and frantically rubbing your clit watching his handsome face contort in pleasure. 

He fucked you while standing up, your little body bouncing in his arms as you fucked you up and down on his cock, your arms wrapped tight around his neck, your tits pressed flush against his pecs, and your lips locked with his in a passionate, sloppy, wet kiss. 

He fucked you on your side, his big body curled around yours and his cock nestled between your ass cheeks before sliding inside you again, your leg hiked up to get deeper. 

He fucked you on all fours, using your ears to pull you back on his cock, your back arched and ass stinging from random spanks while he pounded into the deep, wet heat of your pussy that squeezed and griped him for dear life. When you tried to rub your clit, he smacked it away and rubbed your pussy for you.

“Uh-uh,” he growled. “No touching what’s mine. All you need to do is cum. Can my little bunny do that?” 

You didn't even answer—you couldn't. But your loud moans and sobs bouncing off of your walls are all the answers Logan needs as he fucked you faster, harder, making your clit sing and pleasure zip through you.

When you felt your last orgasm of the night zip through you, you let out a broken whimper and came all over Logan's cock. 

Triggered by your orgasm and sweet little sounds, Logan gripped you tighter and pounded into you without mercy, until he finally released, too.

“Oh, fuck!” he gasped, his loud groans and grunts echoing throughout the room, triggering another mini-orgasm that made your pussy quiver and drip down your thighs. 

Logan came deep inside of you, filling you to the brim. He even had enough to give you on your ass, pulling out to spray your perfect cheeks with more of his seed, pumping his cock furiously behind you.

A smile stretched across your face as the aftershocks began, practically melting into the sheets. 

You were sweaty, winded, soaked, tired, and covered in cum...but you’d never been more satisfied or happier in your life.

Logan finally settled down beside you, turning you over to face him. He gave you a small smile, his face hot with stray hairs sticking to his forehead. 

“Better now?” he murmured, gently stroking down your back.

You wordlessly nodded, a small, tired hum leaving your lips.��

“Good,” he nodded, pressing a kiss into your hair. “Get some rest.”

And just like that, you were out like a light, softly snoring into his chest, your body curled into his side.

You couldn't wait for next spring...

[cevansbrat0007]

Hello, Duchess

Summary: Your first encounter with Bounty Hunter, Ari Levinson, goes worse than you ever could've imagined. Takes place directly after the events in New in Town.

Warnings: Mature Themes, Ari Being A Menace, Bickering, Implied Jealousy, Threats of Violence, Cursing, Minors DNI

A/N: Special thanks to my creative consultant, @curls-and-eyeliner. Part my Sweet Renegade Series. Semi-proofread, not beta'd. All mistakes are my own. Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated. Thanks for reading!

Ari’s P.O.V.

“Can’t believe this town actually has a real live bookstore.” Ari muses as he pulls up in front of the tiny, quaint-looking bookstore. “Fuckin’ wild.” Throwing his truck in park he takes a moment to survey the area, making note of the empty lot.

‘Must not do much business.’ He thinks before climbing out of his vehicle and confidently striding toward the door. Hopefully, the lack of an audience would make things flow a hell of a lot faster. Hell, if you were anything like some of the other women in this town, he’d probably just have to smile and flash his baby blues to convince you to spill your guts.

In fact, he was practically banking on it. Because this wasn’t Ari’s first rodeo – not by a long shot. He’d spent a lot of his life in and out of small towns like Bell’s Creek, which was part of the reason he couldn’t wait to bag his latest bounty and put this place, and its people, in his rearview mirror. Ari reaches for the handle on the door, only to frown when he gets a look at the sign hanging in the window that reads: “sorry, we’re closed”. 

Well, that couldn’t be right. 

He could’ve sworn that when he’d pressed Mrs. Turner, the First Lady of Calvary Baptist Church, about your whereabouts she’d said he’d be able to find you at your shop. Something about your preferring to work instead of resting and rejoicing on the Lord’s day. 

While the bounty hunter supposed he could always try back tomorrow, he was keen to check you off his list. Refusing to admit defeat, he decides to try his luck anyway, only to be surprised when the door opens with a tinkling chime of a bail. 

Confused but also now on high alert, Ari takes a tentative step inside as he looks for any sign of life. “Hello?” He calls out, finally allowing the door to swing shut behind him. Instinct has him reaching for his back pocket, checking to make sure he had brought along his firearm.

Just in case.

“Is anybody here?” He tries again, moving further into the shop. The place is clean and well lit, and boasts rack after rack of books. But what’s most impressive is that there doesn’t appear to be a speck of dust anywhere. “Look, I just came by to–”

“We’re closed!” A disembodied voice sounds from the back of the store. 

“Yeah, I saw the sign, ma’am…” He clears his throat. “But I think you forgot to lock the door, so I –”

“That means get out!”

“So much for southern hospitality.” Ari grumbles under his breath as he continues on his mission to track down the owner of the voice. “Ma’am, I just wanna talk. And maybe–ahh shit!” He curses when his hip accidentally connects with a half-full rolling cart, sending several of the heavier books crashing to the ground. “Sorry!” 

“Did you just break something?!” The voice suddenly screeches. “Don’t make me get my taser.”

“There’s no need for that.” Instead of picking them up, the bounty hunter hastily nudges them aside with his foot. “My name is Ari Levinson, and I’m just here to ask you a couple of questions.”

While this isn’t how the man had expected any of this to go, he’s relieved when he sees a familiar face peek at him from around the corner. A face that happened to be even more beautiful than he initially remembered. Even though it had only been a couple of hours since he’d seen you last. 

Damn! It was as if the image of you in that dress taking up space at the other end of the pew was now permanently imprinted into his brain. He'd have to tread lightly here.

Otherwise things could get complicated. Fast.

Your P.O.V

“Pretty sure this is what law enforcement calls trespassing.” You sniff, craning your head around the corner to stare at the man who was taking up entirely too much space in the narrow hallway. Sure said man was easy on the eyes, but you’d be lying if you said you weren’t at least a little concerned about his apparent inability to read. 

“I can assure you that’s not what this is.” The lawman holds up his palms in an effort to placate you. 

And although you try not to stare, it’s impossible to miss just how big they are – how rough they seemed – with just the right amount of callus. You can’t help but wonder what those hands would feel like on your bare flesh. 

“Then what is it?” You ask, struggling to keep your tone short and clipped as you emerge from your hiding place. The last thing you needed was to have this man thinking you were actually attracted to him. 

If anything, you considered yourself to be curious. No harm there, right? 

“As I said, my name is Ari Levinson. I’m a bounty hunter from just outside Rosewell, New Mexico who also occasionally moonlights as a private investigator.” He tells you, jamming his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I just stopped by to ask you a couple of questions. And while I didn’t necessarily mean to intrude, I figured you might appreciate me taking a more delicate approach on account of your relationship with my person of interest.”

Fucking Martin Westbrook. He’d been the bane of your existence ever since you’d first crossed paths back in high school. 

“I know you’re looking for Martin.” Annoyed by the very nature of the conversation, you pick up a box, hefting it onto your hip so that you can carry it out to the sales floor. “But I’m not quite sure how much help I can be.”

You brush past him, inwardly smiling when he scrambles to get out of your way. It was a subtle reminder that this was your shop. And you absolutely refused to be intimidated by him or anyone else. 

“I’m sure whatever you have to say will be plenty helpful.” He’s quick to reassure you as he turns to follow the path you set. “Provided you’re honest, that is.”

“Did you really just waltz into my shop and call me a liar, Mr. Levinson?” 

“I meant no offense.” Ari coughs, scrubbing a weary hand over his bearded jaw. If you were the overly presumptuous type, you might think you’d just managed to fluster the poor man.

Now feeling extra prickly, you drop the box onto the far counter of your cashwrap before turning to face your unwelcome guest. “As you can see, I have a busy day’s work ahead of me. And I was really keen on doing it by myself.” You gesture at the array of other boxes and racks placed around the store. “So if we could get a move on, I would greatly appreciate it.”  

“Gladly.” He gives a brief look around. “Is there some place maybe where you and I can sit and chat?”

“I’d say here is about as good a place as any.” You tell him as you step behind the counter. Bending down, you snag a bottle of cleaner, along with a couple of rags. If this man insisted on being here, then he would just have to deal with you taking care of your business. “I’m pretty confident in my ability to multitask.”  

Nodding along, Ari pulls out a small notepad and pen from his back pocket. “When was the last time you saw Mr. Westbrook?”

You let out a sigh as you begin to spray down your countertops with your all-purpose cleaner. While you supposed you could’ve gone with something a little more industrial, you were partial to the way this particular brand’s products always smelled. 

“I don’t know.” You shrug as you bask in the scent of rose and cedar. “Maybe three, four weeks ago.” 

“Do you happen to recall the day and time?”

“No. Not really. If I had to ballpark it, I’d guess sometime around the 5th of last month.” You move to the next flat surface, spraying it down just like the last.

“You sure about that?” You try not to let it irk you when you see him take a seat on a nearby step stool out of the corner of your eye. 

“As much as I can be.” 

“And did Mr. Westbrook happen to give you any indication of where he might be headed?”

“Nope.”

He’d been nervous though. That much you did recall. By the time he’d come to you that night, your old friend had been well beyond spooked. 

“Did he give you his reason for leaving?”

“We didn’t…” You trail off, taking a moment to scrub at a particularly stubborn sticky spot that’s marring the wood. “There wasn’t really much time for talking.” You’re so concerned with scrubbing that you miss the way the county hunter’s eyes narrow as he studies you. “He just stopped over to say goodbye.”

And to borrow all the cash you happened to have on hand – to the tune of $500. Enough for a bus ticket and a couple nights in a dirt cheap motel.

“Right.” Ari scoffs, admittedly with a bit more heat than he intends. “Not a lot of time for talking.” He pauses briefly to drag a hand through his shaggy brown locks. “Not sure why I didn’t wanna believe them.” 

“Am I sensing a problem, Mr. Levinson?” You hum, tossing your rag to the side in favor of focusing on the rugs. 

“I guess I’m just having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that he kept you in the dark about his plans.” He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “In my experience, most men like Martin tend to have loose lips around the women they’re fuckin’.”

In that moment, it’s almost as if you can feel the air go out of the room. Just who the fuck did this knuckle-dragging, mouth-breather think he was?

“Excuse me?” Those two little words are spoken through clenched teeth. You’re so taken aback by his brazen accusation that you can scarcely breathe, let alone think.    

Ari simply quirks a tawny brow at you, seemingly unaware of the danger he’s just placed himself in. Did he not see how close your hand was to that damned stapler? While it was clear that folks in this town had been running their mouths, they’d apparently neglected to mention that you’d also been the star pitcher for your high school softball team.   

“Apologies if I offended your delicate sensibilities, Duchess. But I’ve never been the type to beat around the bush. Besides…” The smug bastard tucks his pen behind his ear. “You have to know that people in this town like to talk.”

Fire simmers hot in your belly, as you come out from behind the register. It takes less than ten  seconds for you to bridge the distance between yourself and the cocky lawman. While you might’ve been taught never to raise a hand against anyone, this man was sorely testing every last bit of your patience.

“I want to make one thing very, very clear.” You hiss once you’re finally standing toe-to-toe with the handsome interloper who, of course, makes no room to get up himself. “I have never – not even once – slept with Martin Westbrook. He’s a friend, you backwoods jackass. Something you clearly know nothing about.” 

“I get the feeling I struck a nerve.” 

And, judging by the newfound tick in his jaw, so had you. Except you had no way of knowing it was because he’d lost a buddy of his own a little while back. 

“And I think it’s about time you got the hell out of my shop.” His piercing blue eyes fly to yours, letting you know that you’d managed to surprise him with your heated dismissal. 

Good. Because this Ari Levinson fella had officially overstayed his welcome.

“Look, Duchess. I apolo –”

“That’s the second time you’ve called me out of my name, Mr. Levinson. And I’m not sure I appreciate it.” You spit as you take a step backwards with the intention of giving him enough space to stand. “Now, I’ve been nothing but amenable to your rather…invasive questions. But we’re done. So, I’m gonna have to insist that you leave.”

Before you decided he’d make a deserving candidate for death by a thousand paper cuts. 

Your pulse continues to thrum in your ears as you watch him rise to his full height – an impressive 6’4 – so that he now towers over you. Perhaps if you weren’t so angry you’d be a little more tempted to allow your mind to wander a little farther into the realm of fantasy. 

But not now. 

Right now, in this moment, all you wanted was to watch Ari Levinson’s sculpted ass walk right out your front door.  

Nodding, the now quiet bounty hunter begins moving in the direction of the entrance. Neither of you say a word as you make that quick walk. In fact, you don’t speak again until Ari’s hand is on the handle. 

“For what it's worth…” He blows out a weary breath. “This wasn’t how I meant for this to go.” His eyes find yours, as if imploring you to see the truth in them. 

However, instead of responding all you can do is offer up a shrug. Which he, of course, takes as an opportunity to keep going. 

“It’s just…the idea of someone like you getting caught up with a piece of slime like Westbrook…” He pauses long enough to open the door and take a tentative step outside. “I guess it bothered me more than I realized.”

His reluctant admission has your stomach tied up in knots, which prompts you to ask the one question you were almost certain you’d regret later: 

“And just what do you mean by that?” You do your best to seem unruffled as you awkwardly brace yourself against the doorframe.

“All I’m saying is that you’re out of his league.” Feeling even more confused, you watch as Ari’s lips curve in a faint smile. “And if you didn’t know that before, well, now you do.” His head dips politely as he turns to head towards his truck. 

“Guess I’ll see you around, Duchess.” You don’t have to see his face to know that he’s grinning. “Oh, and don’t forget to lock up. Might help with all those unwanted visitors you’ve been havin.”

Ari doesn't need to turn his head to know that you're currently giving him the finger. He can feel it. And all it does it make him smile harder.

END 

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[siriuslylu]

constellation - wolfstar microfic - word count: 2055

Remus entered the room looking down, deep in thought.

“Moony! What’s with the face?” asked James, he got to the room a little bit before him and was heading to his bed.

Remus looked at him, really looked, James, one of his best friends, gigantic heart, patient like no one else, he was always on the front line for his friends, always a kind word, a soft look, a good ear. Figured if he could talk to anyone, it’d be him, and found out he was actually itching to get it out of his system.

So, he sighed and walked his way.

“Prongs, actually, can I talk to you for a minute? Where you going somewhere?”

“Oh, sure Moons! I was looking for my gloves before heading to the Quidditch field, but it’s only me practicing so I got time, what’s up?”

He took a moment, he was actually gonna do it, it seemed easier in his head, but right now, he felt suddenly nervous. James encouraged him to sit on the bed with him.

“Well? What’s on your mind?”

“Prongs, I-“, he licked his lips.

His friend frowned, “Remus, should I worr-“

“IlikeSirius”

A moment of silence.

“What?”

He took a deep breath again, closing his eyes and sighed heavily while opening them

“I… I like Sirius”

“O…kay? Me too?”

“No, Prongs… I… like him. As in… I’m a little bit in… love with him”

“You… WHAT?!”

He panicked, has it been a mistake? Should he backtrack and say it was a joke?

Seeing Remus’ face, James hurried to clarify

“Wait, no, I, sorry Moons, I didn’t mean to be rude, it just… took me by surprise I guess, umm, wanna tell me a bit more?”

Okay, maybe it wasn’t all lost, he could do it.

“I don’t really know when… I just…” he couldn’t find the words, hasn’t thought this far through honestly, and what exactly did he feel for his friend? How could he explain? “I really don’t know when it changed, one day he was just my friend, the next day I realised I was somehow upset? whenever I saw him with girls or whatever, figured it was because I didn’t want him to spend less time with us, and then, suddenly one day, I saw hip applying lip balm and thought ‘huh, how would it feel to kiss the strawberry off his lips?’ And stilled, because you just don’t think things like that about your friends; after that it all went down, I saw him everywhere all the time, and it… it wouldn’t stop, every normal thing he did was suddenly huge, I couldn’t stop staring at him, watching his hands gesticulate when he talked, his cheeky smile when he thought of a prank, the length of his bloody eyelashes, it was so frustrating, I started to blush whenever I heard him laugh, I think I’m going insane” he looked up to find his friend gaping at him with wide eyes “oh, sorry, I guess it was too much?”

James got out of his trance and looked at him softly smiling that warm James Potter smile “no Moons, not too much, just surprised you… felt that way, I can see you really need to get it out”

“I feel like vomiting, both literally and figuratively, are you… weirded out?”

He saw his friend think for a moment before shaking his head

“No, not really” he frowned a bit and relaxed “it actually makes sense, you two are very close, I know how people usually feel about umm queerness, but you’re my friend Moony” he grabbed his hand and squeezed it “you’re my best friend, how could I be weirded out by you? I know you, it’s not typical, yeah, but who am I to tell someone who should or shouldn’t fancy or love?”

Remus sighed again, he felt a huge backpack off his shoulders “thanks Prongs, you’re an amazing friend, you knew that?”

He saw him shrug confidently “so I’ve been told” and looked at him again in that soft way he had reserved for his friends “Moony, are you going to tell him?”

And there it was, his biggest fear, she shook his head sadly

“No, I don’t think so, how would you feel if suddenly your guy best friend confessed?”

“I don’t know, but I wouldn’t want him suffering in silence, I mean, I’d prefer to know I guess”

“Is not that easy, I don’t wanna ruin our friendship”

“You don’t think he can feel the same way?”

He snorted, yeah sure, as if Sirius Black could like him

“No way, first of all, have you seen how many girlfriends he’s had? And second of all, have you seen me?”

That put a deep defensive frown in his friend’s face

“What do you mean have I seen you? What’s wrong with you?”

“How much time do you have” he said rolling his eyes

“Moony, you’re amazing, and handsome, even I can admit that, don’t think so low of you”

“Well, still, I don’t think he likes blokes so…”

“Have you asked him?”

“Of course not”

“Then?”

He sighed “it’s… complicates Prongs, I’d rather keep his friendship intact, I really don’t know how could he react or what he could think of me”

“Give him more credit, he wouldn’t push you off”

“It’s easy to say when the feelings are not towards you”

A moment of silence, then James broke it looking at him

“Okay Moons, tell me then”

“What?”

“Whatever you want to, everything, take it off your chest, tell me everything you feel about him, what would you tell him if you could”

“That might really freak you out”

“It won’t, I promise, you need to let it out”

A moment

“Okay, I-“ he felt suddenly a bit shy, but he stared at his hands, it’d be just like talking to his journal, he thought, James was giving him the space he needed and maybe it’d help him, maybe if he wasn’t full of it he could actually look at Sirius and not feel like a ticking bomb. “You know summer evenings? When you’re just laying on the grass watching the water in the lake as still as it can get, feeling the warm breeze caress your hair, the last rays of sunshine in your face? Right in that golden hour when everything’s at peace, when the world stops for a minute and you feel the happiest you’ve ever been and will ever be, that nothing can go wrong and life is wonderful?”

“Yeah”

“That’s how I feel when I look at him, he feels like a summer evening every time I see him smile, I feel like I could do everything in life if say or do something that makes him laugh, like I’d trade everything I own for him to throw his head back and explode in laughter without other care in the world, he feels… safe, like home, like I could sleep in the curves of his curls. Watching his eyes go from blue to gray in cold days is like getting to know the best kept secret, I could trace by memory every mole, I could chart all his freckles and create the most beautiful constellations, I could listen to him talk about anything and everything like he’s my favourite record, I- as you can see I can become the sappiest idiot, I swear, the girls wouldn’t rival me” he chuckled.

A minute and he looked up to find James looking at him with the saddest smile.

“Moons…” he said in a whisper “that’s… you’re… that was beautiful. Are you absolutely sure he wouldn’t feel the same way?”

He opened his mouth to refute again, when the wardrobe door beat him, opening slowly. Everything stilled, the world paused, he was pretty damn sure even time stopped, because there, inside, was Sirius Black himself, looking fragile, face unreadable full of feelings, Remus thought he was going to die right then and there, he could barely speak

“Si-Sirius, I-“

A hand on halt and he closed his mouth instantly, next to him James held his breath

“Padfoot? What were you doing there?”

“Did you… mean all that?” Said ignoring James and holding Remus’ gaze

“I-“

“Did you?” Said hurriedly

There was no point in lying now, cards where on the table apparently, and if he was lucky, at least he might even instead of losing

“I- Yes Sirius I- I meant all of it” said closing his eyes “but you don’t- please I can’t-“ he opened them up again and grew wide when he saw tears in the corner of his friends eyes “Siriu-“

“I would…”

Silence

“I would feel the same way… just so you know”

“You… what?”

A chuckle

“I didn’t think you could feel the same way I did”

“You…?!”

“Padfoot you like Moony back?” Asked James excitedly, both friends looked at him then and he felt out of place “oh I umm, sorry, got carried away, of course you can talk about it without me here, I’ll just, uh, go” he went for the door when he heard Sirius calling

“Prongs”, as he turned, a pair of gloves flew to him, caught them just in time, “I was actually hiding to scare you the moment you came looking for them, I was about to jump when moony came in.

“Oh” he snorted, “well, thanks, I’ll be on the field if you guys need me, yeah?”

“Sure pal”

James left the room and suddenly, the air thickened

“Remus, look at me?”

He did, and oh he was doomed, those eyes held the entire universe in them

“Moony, my Moony” Sirius approached carefully and sit on the spot James left “how… how long?”

Remus took a breath “I really don’t know… Way too bloody much though” he chuckled “you… you really…?”

“Yes”, no hesitation

“How? When? How? I mean…”

Sirius shrugged, “I don’t know, I guess since the beginning but I didn’t notice until we grew up a bit more, I always found you handsome but… liking you? A while ago, I wanted to be with you all the time, and you’re the first one I wanna show a new song, or talk about my day, I think of you every time there’s chocolate cauldron and save one up in case you get late for lunch, it’s happened since forever. I just didn’t think you….”

“Yes”, his turn to be firm about it

A minute

“Could you really map a constellation from my freckles?”, Sirius joked, because of course he could

“I can”

“Show me”

“Well”, he started drawing lines in his face, slowly, softly, actually enjoying the fact that he could touch him this intimately “it starts with this one here, under your eye, right to this one on the top of your nose, up to the bigger one on your cheekbone, and back to the centre of your lower lip”

He stopped there for a second, and when he was about to move away, Sirius kissed his finger softly, Remus’ breath hitched as he looked at him, then Sirius grabbed his hand, opening it fully and kissing it

“Moony”

And that was it, he wasn’t about to wait any longer, Remus cradled his face, got closer but stopped an inch away, looking into Sirius eyes for something that’d stop him, he couldn’t find anything, just saw him closing his eyes and a second later the distance there was left.

Kissing Sirius Black felt like nothing he’s ever experienced before, his lips were soft and moved carefully around his, felt him open his mouth, and the moment he tasted his tongue knew there was no going back, he’d never feel this again with anyone, it was as if a supernova exploded in his chest, he felt like crying, and laughing, and breathing, and dying and living all at the same time, actually, he was probably doing all of it.

They separated a little bit, Sirius moved forward again and pecked him, and pecked him, and pecked him again, as if making sure it was real, Remus giggled and pecked him back, just because he could, and when their eyes met, they smiled

“If I’m your summer evenings, to me, you’re the rest of the days and nights”

And oh, he loved summer

———

English is not my first language, so please forgive grammar mistakes, also idk if 2000 words count as “microfic” lol but thanks for reading 🌻

[silverstar70]

Fandom: NCIS Character: Alden Parker x fem!reader

Author’s note: English is not my first language so I apologise for any mistakes.

Warnings: 🔞‼️smut, vaginal sex, established relationship, oral sex, edging, fingering, roleplay doctor/patient, kitchen sex, praise kink, beard kink

Summary: Inspired by episode 21x8. Alden came back home still wearing the scrubs and Y/N is turned on.

Words: 4,604k

Dr. Parker

Y/N was making some dinner when she heard the front door opening. She knew it was Alden and immediately stopped what she was doing to welcome him. She was overjoyed that he was back home since they hadn’t been able to see each other for over a week due to both their jobs.

As she saw him, Y/N threw herself into his arms coughing him off guard. He embraced her straightway,

“Hi. I missed you so much.” She whispered in his ear, holding him tighter.

“I missed you too, baby.” He replied as they parted. At that moment she realized he had a stiff neck and suddenly feared that she might have hugged him too tight.

“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry, I forgot about your neck. Did I hurt you?” she rambled worried but noticed no sign of discomfort on him.

His features softened at the way she was worrying. Alden wasn’t used to people looking after him or being worried about him. Yeah, the team got worried about him just a few hours prior, but that was different. So, whenever Y/N showed some interest in his work, asked him about his day, or showed worries, it always surprised him.

“Honey, I’m fine. Torres gave me a back-crack and it worked magic.”

“That’s great.” She gave him a peck on his lips “Take off your coat. I made dinner.”

Y/N walked back to the kitchen, leaving Alden behind as he did what she said. Entering the kitchen he saw her focused on cooking while a good smell filled the room.

“What are you making?” he asked curiously.

“Pasta with—” she began to reply but stopped mid-sentence when she saw that he wasn’t wearing his usual clothes. “Why are you wearing a scrub?”

Alden hesitated for a second before answering, not wanting to make her worry. “I went undercover and forgot to change.”

Y/N watched him from head to toe a few times. He saw the changes in her eyes as they seemed to turn into two black holes, he knew that look all too well. She unconsciously bit her lower lips, still focused on the way he looked while she felt the desire starting to fill her body.

“Don’t give me that look.” He warned.

“What look?”

“The ‘I wanna fuck you right here, right now’ look.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She replied innocently as she walked slowly towards him, pushed him closer to her and kissed him passionately. He wrapped her into his arms and leaned into the kiss, groaning.

It quickly became hot and desperate. Their wandering hands traveled along each other’s bodies, making clear what they wanted. He backed her off to the kitchen counter, kissing her more avidly and making her moan. Her fingers threaded through his hair, anchoring him to her as their kisses grew more urgent, more desperate.

“Someone is turned on,” Alden said smirking.

She nodded eagerly “You look so hot dress like this.”

He smirked at the effect he had on her. His lips began trailing down her neck nipping and kissing the sensitive skin. She gasped, her breath hitching as he found a particularly sensitive spot. He smiled against her skin, loving the way she responded to his touch.

"Alden," she moaned softly, her voice filled with need.

He lifted his head, his eyes locking with hers, dark with desire. "I need you,” he said, his voice low and husky.

She nodded, her eyes mirroring his desire. "Then don't stop," she whispered.

Alden didn't need any more encouragement. He kissed her again, his hands exploring her body with a renewed intensity. He slid his hands down her back, feeling the warmth of her skin through the thin fabric of her shirt. His fingers found the hem, slipping underneath to touch her bare skin. She shivered at his touch, her body arching into his.

His lips traveled back up to her jaw, then captured her mouth in a searing kiss. She tasted like home, familiar and intoxicating. He couldn't get enough. He needed more of her, needed to feel her against him without any barriers.

She seemed to sense his urgency. Her hands left his hair and moved to the hem of his shirt. He chuckled softly against her lips, helping her by pulling the shirt over his head in one swift motion. She ran her hands over his chest, her touch setting his skin on fire.

Alden's hands roamed lower, finding the waistband of her shorts and panties. He hooked his fingers into them and slowly, teasingly, pulled them down. She stepped out of them, kicking them aside, her eyes never leaving his. He could see the desire in her gaze, mirrored in his own.

He lifted her onto the counter, stepping between her legs. She wrapped them around his waist, pulling him closer. The feel of his body pressed against hers was almost too much to bear. She could feel how much he wanted her and bit her lower lips at the thought. He kissed her again, hard and demanding, his hands gripping her hips.

Their kisses grew more frenzied, more desperate. Alden's hands slid under her shirt, pushing it up and over her head. She wore a simple bra, and he took a moment to appreciate the sight of her. She was beautiful, every inch of her. He kissed her collarbone, moving lower, trailing kisses down to the swell of her breasts.

She arched into him, her breath coming in short, sharp gasps, as the feeling of his beard was tickling against her skin. "Alden," she whispered, her voice a plea.

“You’re beautiful.” He whispered against her skin. Looking up at her and placing another kiss on her lips, Y/N wrapped her arm around his neck, deepening the kiss, and pulling his hair a little.

He reached behind her, unhooking her bra and tossing it aside. He cupped her breasts, his thumbs brushing over her nipples, drawing a moan from her lips. He took one in his mouth, swirling his tongue around the sensitive peak, while his hand teased the other. She writhed against him, her hands gripping his shoulders for support.

Alden kissed his way back up to her mouth, his hands never ceasing their exploration. She was soft and warm and perfect, and he couldn't get enough of her. He pressed closer, feeling the heat of her body against his.

"I love you," she whispered against his lips, her voice rough with emotion.

"I love you too," he replied, with a radiant smile.

In that moment, everything felt right. The days apart were a distant memory, overshadowed by the intensity of their reunion. They stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, savoring the closeness and the love that bound them together.

Alden reached down, discarding his pants and boxers. He paused, looking into her eyes, seeking her permission. She nodded, her eyes dark with desire and love. He positioned himself at her entrance, taking a moment to savor the feeling of being so close to her. He pushed inside her slowly, both of them gasping at the sensation.

“Oh God,” she whispered gripping at his shoulder.

He held still for a moment, letting them both adjust to the feeling. She tightened her legs around him, urging him deeper. He began to move, slow and gentle at first, then faster, harder, as their need for each other grew.

Their movements became more frantic, their breaths coming in short, sharp gasps. The kitchen was filled with the sounds of their lovemaking, the slap of skin against skin, the whispered words of love and longing. It wasn’t about quantity in that moment, they just wanted to feel the other closer.

His hand found its way between their bodies, reaching her clit. As his fingers began to draw small circles, she felt a pleasant feeling grew in her stomach. Her hips arched against his hands wanting to feel more. His beard brushing over her chest sent shivers through her spine, adding sensations.

His thrusts were more deliberate and precise, hitting her in the right spot he knew would send her over the edge. With her legs wrapped around his waist, she pulled him deeper as her arms were around his neck and her hands tangled in his hair. Alden felt himself closer to the edge, and he could tell she was close too.

“Don’t stop, honey.” She moaned.

His hands moved faster on her wet clit, his pounding was deeper and harder. The kitchen was filled by the sound of their low grows and moans. With a final, deep thrust, they both found their release, crying out each other’s names. Alden held her close, their bodies trembling with the aftershocks of their lovemaking.

“Fuck, Y/N.” He kissed her softly, tenderly, on her forehead, his heart swelling with love for her. “I missed you so much,” he whispered, his voice filled with emotion.

“I missed you too,” she replied, her voice equally soft.

They stayed like that for a while, holding each other, savoring the feeling of being together. Her forehead rested against his, wrapped in each other’s arms, knowing that no matter how much time passed, they would always find their way back to each other. Eventually, Alden helped her down from the counter, both of them still breathless and flushed.

“I think you need a little more care,” Alden murmured against her ear, his voice playful yet thick with desire.

She looked up at him, her eyebrow arched in question. “Oh? What kind of care do you have in mind, Doctor Parker?”

He grinned, loving the playful spark in her eyes. “Well, it seems you might need a thorough examination. After all, I’ve been away for a few days. Can’t have you suffering from withdrawal, can we?”

Her smile widened as she caught onto his game. “Withdrawal, you say? And what would you prescribe for that, Doctor?”

“Why don’t we take this to the bedroom, and I’ll show you?” His voice was smooth, with a hint of mischief, making her heart race with excitement.

“Lead the way, Doctor.” She giggled, her fingers trailing down his chest as he took her hand and guided her out of the kitchen.

They moved through the dimly lit hallway, the anticipation between them building with each step. By the time they reached the bedroom, the air was thick with tension, the kind that made every touch electric. Alden pushed open the door and led her inside, the familiar surroundings instantly comforting.

Once inside, Alden turned to face her, his expression serious yet playful. “I think it’s time for your examination,” he said, his voice dropping to a deep, authoritative tone that sent a thrill through her.

She bit her lip, enjoying the way he took control. “Yes, Doctor,” she replied, her voice soft and obedient, playing along with the role he was setting.

“Good,” he murmured, stepping closer. He gently pushed her to sit on the edge of the bed, his hands running up her arms in a soothing, almost clinical manner. “Let’s start with the basics.”

Once she was completely bare before him, Alden took a moment to admire her, his eyes roaming over her body with a look of appreciation and hunger. “You’re perfect,” he murmured, his voice filled with sincerity and adoration.

“Thank you, Doctor,” she whispered, feeling her heart swell at his words.

He stepped back slightly, adopting a more clinical demeanor as he continued the game. “Now that you're comfortable, I’ll need to assess your overall well-being,” Alden said, his tone a mix of playful seriousness and genuine desire. He knelt before her, his hands lightly resting on her knees as he gazed up at her. “Let’s begin with a basic check-up, shall we?”

She nodded, her breath catching in her throat as she anticipated his next move. The intensity of his gaze made her feel vulnerable, yet deeply desired, and she couldn’t help but tremble slightly under his touch.

Alden slowly ran his hands up her legs, his fingers brushing lightly over her skin, sending shivers through her body. He paused at her thighs, his hands resting there as he leaned in closer. “You seem tense,” he observed, his voice soft and soothing. “We can’t have that, now can we?”

“No, Doctor,” she replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

“I’ll need to check your pulse,” he said, a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he brought his hand to the side of her neck, his fingers pressing gently against her pulse point. His touch was firm yet tender, his eyes never leaving hers as he counted the beats, feeling the rapid thrum beneath her skin.

“Your heart is racing,” he murmured, his voice low. "Have you been experiencing any... excitement lately?"

She bit her lip, trying to maintain her composure under his intense gaze. "Only since you arrived, Doctor,"

He smiled, proudly. "I see. Perhaps a more thorough examination is in order."

His hand trailed down from her neck to her collarbone, then lower, brushing lightly over her breasts. Her breath hitched again as his fingers traced the curve of her body, his touch sending sparks of pleasure through her.

“Lie back,” he instructed, his voice firm but gentle.

She did as he asked, lying back on the bed, her heart pounding in her chest. Alden leaned over her, his hands roaming her body with a practiced ease that made her feel both cherished and thoroughly examined. He ran his hands over her arms, her sides, her stomach, pausing occasionally as if to make a mental note of her reactions.

“You’re responding well to the treatment,” he remarked, his voice filled with satisfaction. “But I think we need to be thorough. Can’t leave any stone unturned.”

“Yes, Doctor,” she whispered, her voice trembling with anticipation.

Alden moved lower, his hands sliding down to her hips, then to her thighs, spreading them gently apart. She gasped at the intimate contact, her body instinctively responding to his touch. He looked up at her, his eyes dark with desire, yet maintaining the playful pretense of his role.

“Now, let’s check your reflexes,” he said, his voice husky. He ran his hands up and down her inner thighs, his fingers grazing her most sensitive areas but never quite touching where she needed him most. It was a deliberate tease, and she felt her body grow more desperate for him with each passing second.

She moaned softly, her hips involuntarily lifting toward him, seeking more of his touch. Alden smirked at her reaction, clearly enjoying the effect he was having on her. “Sensitive, I see. That’s good. Very good.”

“Please, Doctor,” she whispered, her voice edged with desperation.

He raised an eyebrow, feigning surprise. “Please what, Miss? You’ll have to be more specific if you want me to administer the correct treatment.”

“Touch me,” she pleaded, her voice trembling with need. “I need you to touch me.”

Alden’s expression softened, the playful dominance giving way to something deeper. “As you wish,” he murmured, his voice filled with tenderness and desire.

He positioned himself between her legs, his eyes locked on hers as he lowered his head. The anticipation built within her, her entire body trembled with expectation. He started by kissing the inside of her thigh, his lips soft and warm, but it was the feel of his beard that had her writhing beneath him. The rough texture against her sensitive skin sent waves of pleasure coursing through her, making her moan softly.

“You’re already so wet,” he observed, his voice thick with desire. “Do you need this that badly?”

“Yes,” she breathed, her voice barely audible. “I need you, Alden.”

He paused for a moment, savoring the sound of her saying his name in such a vulnerable, needy tone. It made his heart swell with affection, and his own desire grew stronger. Without another word, he slipped a finger inside her, drawing a deep moan from her lips as her body arched off the bed.

“Is this what you needed?” he asked, his tone a mix of tenderness and authority as he began to move his finger inside her, slow and deliberate.

“Yes, Doctor,” she replied, her voice shaking with pleasure. “It feels so good…”

Alden smiled, adding a second finger, curling them inside her to find that perfect spot.

“God, Alden!” She cried out, her hands gripping the sheets as he continued to work her with practiced precision. He watched her face, drinking in every expression, every gasp, every shudder of pleasure.

“You’re doing so well,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing. “I think we’re making great progress.”

She could only moan in response, her body trembling with each wave of pleasure that washed over her. “Please don’t stop.” she gasped, her body already teetering on the edge.

Alden increased the pace of his fingers, his thumb finding her clit and applying just the right amount of pressure. The combination was too much, and she felt closer to the edge when suddenly, he stopped moving and withdrew his fingers

“Fuck!” she moaned loudly in frustration.

He couldn’t help but smile at her reaction, “Patient, Miss. Let the doctor do his work,” he teased, his voice thick with amusement and desire.

Her annoyance quickly faded as he pressed his lips against her most sensitive spot. He kissed her there softly at first, his beard brushing against her with every movement, each sensation heightened by the roughness of his facial hair. It was an exquisite kind of torture, the combination of softness and roughness.

Alden seemed to know exactly what he was doing to her, and he reveled in her reactions. His tongue flicked out, teasing her gently, while his beard provided an entirely different kind of stimulation. She moaned, her hands gripping the sheets as she tried to control the overwhelming sensations building within her.

“Good girl,” he murmured against her, the praise sending a fresh wave of arousal through her. “You’re doing so well. But I’m not done with you yet.”

His tongue began to move with more purpose, lapping at her with a rhythm that was both relentless and gentle. The combination of his skilled mouth and the delicious friction of his beard was too much. She felt herself spiraling, the pleasure mounting with every passing second.

“Alden, please…” she gasped, her body trembling as she teetered on the brink.

“Not yet,” he said, pulling back slightly to look up at her, his eyes dark and intense. “I want to hear you beg for it.”

The command in his voice sent a shiver down her spine. She wanted to protest, to tell him she was already so close, but the way he was looking at her made her want to submit, to give him what he wanted.

“Please, Doctor,” she begged, her voice trembling with need. “I need you… please…”

“Good girl,” he murmured, clearly satisfied with her submission. “Now, let’s finish this examination.”

He returned to his task with renewed intensity, his mouth and beard working in tandem to drive her over the edge. This time, he didn’t hold back, his tongue moving faster, his beard rubbing against her with every movement.

She felt the pleasure build and build until it became unbearable. “Fuck, Alden!”

Her body convulsed as waves of ecstasy crashed over her, her breath coming in ragged gasps as she rode out the intense pleasure. Alden didn’t stop, his mouth and beard continuing their assault until she was completely spent, her body limp and trembling.

Finally, he pulled back, a satisfied smile on his lips as he looked up at her. “I think that’s one successful treatment,” he said, his voice laced with satisfaction.

She could only nod, her breath still coming in short gasps as she tried to recover. He climbed up onto the bed beside her, pulling her into his arms and holding her close as her breathing gradually returned to normal.

He kissed her forehead, his touch tender and loving as he whispered, “You did so well, my love. I’m so proud of you.”

She smiled, nuzzling against his chest, feeling a deep sense of contentment wash over her. “Thank you, Alden… I mean, Doctor,” she added with a playful grin.

Alden chuckled, his arms tightening around her. “You’re very welcome, Miss. I’m always here to take care of you.”

They lay there together for a while, the warmth of their connection lingering in the air. But Alden wasn’t done yet. He had more in mind, and he could tell by the way she was looking at him that she was ready for whatever came next.

“I think there’s still some follow-up treatment we need to take care of,” Alden murmured, his voice once again taking on that authoritative tone that sent shivers down her spine.

“Oh?” she replied, her eyes lighting up with anticipation. “And what kind of treatment might that be, Doctor?”

Alden smirked, moving so that he was hovering over her, his body pressing her gently into the mattress. “Something a little more intensive,” he whispered, his lips brushing against hers. “Something to make sure you’re fully recovered.”

She moaned softly as his hands began to roam her body again, his touch confident and possessive. “I think I might need that, Doctor,” she whispered back, her voice filled with desire.

Alden kissed her deeply, his hands exploring every inch of her body as he prepared to give her exactly what she needed. He pulled back slightly, his eyes locking onto hers as he positioned himself at her entrance.

“I want you to tell me how it feels,” he murmured, his voice low and commanding. “I want to hear every sound you make, every word that slips from your lips.”

She nodded, her breath hitching as she felt him begin to push inside her, filling her completely. She gasped at the sensation, her body stretching to accommodate him, the feeling of him inside her both intense and deeply satisfying.

“Oh, Alden,” she moaned, her voice trembling with pleasure. “It feels… it feels so good.”

“Good,” he replied, his voice rough with emotion as he began to move, slow and deliberate, each thrust drawing soft cries of pleasure from her lips.

He watched her closely, every little reaction making his desire burn hotter. He loved the way she responded to him, the way her body moved with his, the way she called out his name with such raw need.

“Does it feel good, darling?” he asked, his voice low and intimate.

“Yes, so good,” she breathed, her hands gripping his shoulders as he moved within her, the pleasure building once again with each deep, deliberate thrust.

Alden increased his pace, his thrusts becoming more forceful, more desperate as he felt his own need rising. He wanted to lose himself in her, to feel every part of her, to give her everything he had.

“Come for me again,” he whispered, his voice thick with desire. “I want to feel you come around me.”

Her breath caught in her throat at his words, her body already teetering on the edge of another orgasm. She moaned loudly, her nails digging into his back as she let herself go, her body shuddering with pleasure as she came, hard and intense.

Alden groaned, the sensation of her tightening around him pushing him over the edge. He thrust deeply into her one final time, feeling her muscles clench around him as he reached his own climax. His release was powerful, his body trembling as he emptied himself inside her, a deep groan escaping his lips. The intensity of the moment was overwhelming, the connection between them stronger than ever as they rode the waves of pleasure together.

Alden held her close, their bodies still entwined as they came down from the high of their lovemaking. He could feel her heart pounding against his chest, her breaths coming in short, ragged gasps as she tried to regain her composure. He pressed gentle kisses to her forehead, her cheeks, her lips, whispering words of love and affection as they lay there, basking in the afterglow.

She smiled up at him, her eyes filled with contentment and adoration. “That was… incredible,” she whispered, her voice soft and filled with awe.

“You’re incredible,” Alden replied, his voice tender and sincere. He brushed a strand of hair away from her face, his fingers lingering on her skin as he gazed down at her. “I’m so lucky to have you.”

Her heart swelled at his words, and she reached up to cup his face in her hands, pulling him down for a slow, lingering kiss. “I’m the lucky one,” she murmured against his lips, her eyes shining with love.

They lay there together, wrapped in each other’s arms, the world outside fading away as they savored the closeness of the moment. It was as if time had stopped, leaving them in their own little bubble of happiness and contentment.

After a while, Alden shifted slightly, rolling onto his side and pulling her with him so they were lying face to face. He ran his fingers lightly over her arm, his touch gentle and soothing. “How are you feeling, my love?” he asked, his voice soft and caring.

She smiled, feeling a warmth spread through her at the concern in his voice. “I feel wonderful,” she replied, her tone filled with contentment.

He grinned, his heart swelling with pride at her words. “I’m glad,” he said, leaning in to press a soft kiss to her lips. "You know," he said, a playful tone creeping into his voice, "I think we might need to schedule regular follow-up appointments."

She giggled, her fingers dancing over his chest. "Oh? And how often would you recommend, Doctor?"

"Daily, at least," he replied, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Perhaps even more frequently, depending on how well you respond to treatment."

"Daily?" she teased, arching an eyebrow. "Are you sure you can handle that, Doctor? That’s quite a demanding schedule."

He grinned, his hand sliding down to rest on her hip. "For you? I’d happily clear my calendar."

She laughed softly, the sound like music to his ears. "Well, in that case, I think I’ll have to take full advantage of your services."

"Anytime, anywhere," he murmured, his voice dropping to a more serious tone as he gazed into her eyes.

Alden’s heart swelled with emotion, his love for her feeling almost too big to contain. He kissed her again, slow and sweet, pouring everything he felt into that one gesture. When they finally pulled apart, he rested his forehead against hers, their breaths mingling in the small space between them.

"You should get some rest," he murmured, his voice filled with concern and affection.

She nodded sleepily, her body finally succumbing to the exhaustion that had been kept at bay by the intensity of their night together. "Hold me?" she asked softly, her voice barely a whisper.

"Always," he replied, his arms tightening around her as he settled them both under the covers.

With a contented sigh, she closed her eyes, a small smile playing on her lips as she drifted off to sleep, safe and warm in his embrace. Alden watched her for a while, his heart swelling with love and gratitude for the woman in his arms.

Eventually, he allowed his own eyes to close, the rhythm of her breathing lulling him into a deep, peaceful sleep. And as they slept, wrapped in the warmth of their love, the world outside faded away, leaving only the two of them, together and complete.

[aliahm]

“When I’m not with you, think of you always”

Crowley x Gender Neutral Reader

Summary: You wind up talking to Crowley about the unexpected reason you bought your new sunglasses.

Warnings: Mentions of crying and being overwhelmed

If there are any content warnings I left out, or I made any mistakes writing for a gender neutral reader, please let me know.

(Credit for the beautiful dividers used in this post goes to each of the creators here on tumblr. The images were found on google, and credit for each of them goes to the owners. The title is a lyric from, of course, “Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy” by Queen <3).

“Hey, love?”

You looked up from your laptop, towards the sound of Crowley’s voice, and saw him standing in the living room doorway.

“Hm?”

“Where’d you get these?”

Dangling from his fingers was a pair of sunglasses that somewhat resembled his own.

“Oh,” you responded, a bit reluctantly, “I bought them a few days ago. They’re for uh, going out”.

He turned the sunglasses over in his hands, observing them more closely. “We went to lunch yesterday and you didn’t wear them”.

You nodded, “Yeah, they’re only for when I’m not with you”.

“Well,” he scoffed, caught off guard by your response, “I suppose if we walked around wearing the same thing it’d get old soon enough”.

You smiled amusedly, and before you could stop yourself, you replied: “True, but that’s not the reason”.

“Then what’s the reason?”

“Damnit” you mentally cursed yourself for letting that slip.

Your eyes zeroed in on your sunglasses in his hands, and then started bouncing back and forth from yours to his, which were hanging from the neckline of his shirt.

“It’s not important.” you answered hesitantly.

“Honey-”

“You don’t believe me, right?”

“Not for a second”.

He walked over to the couch you were sitting on, and knelt behind it, as you turned around in your seat to fully face him.

“What’s going on?”

“It might sound kind of strange”.

“That’s alright,” he reassured you. “you know you can talk to me”.

You nodded, and told him:

“I bought them for when I’m not with you, because I don’t need them then”.

“Why’s that?” he asked.

“Cause you help me through it when I’m overwhelmed, but when you’re not there, all I can do is cry”.

“and you bought the sunglasses because you don’t want anybody to see you?”

You nodded again. “People don’t usually react well when I cry, but it happens so much. Even when I don’t want to cry, it happens, and I hate it”.

“Tears are nothing to be ashamed of,” he reminded you, “especially when you’re overwhelmed, and you have to put yourself first when that happens. It doesn’t matter what anyone else might think about you crying”.

“I know that,” you agreed, “but still, you’re the only person who’s ever made me feel like it’s okay to cry at all. When you’re not around, I go back to trying to hide it, cause it’s all I know how to do”.

“Sometimes I wish I could be there all the time.” He told you, a thoughtful frown crossing his face. “Makes me feel better to know I’m right there if you need me”.

“I know,” you replied, squeezing his hand, “but I won’t ask that of you. We both know I can handle myself, I’m just trying to figure out how to do that”.

“You’re not some problem to be “handled”, baby. You’re a person with feelings, and you already do a damn good job at handling those feelings every day, even when it’s difficult”.

A grateful smile tugged at the corners of your lips, and he continued:

“Even so, neither of us can control peoples’ reactions to what we do, and we both know I wouldn’t react well if anyone decided to judge you for crying”.

He nodded towards your sunglasses.

“If these help you when I’m not around, then good, but if ever they’re not enough, then you come to me, or just say the word and I’ll come to you, no matter where or when”.

“I promise I will”.

“Good”.

He smiled and pressed his lips to your forehead, and you smiled along with him, an idea suddenly entering your mind.

“Wanna see me try the sunglasses on?”

Crowley laughed, and gently ran his fingers through your hair. “Go for it, sweetheart”.

[lindslindseyy]

Dancing in the rain with the Chief Justice (Neuvillette x female reader)

This scenario is about about dancing in the rain with Neuvillette and it has been getting in my head lately so I decided to write a fanfic about it.

This is my first time posting a fanfic help, Also expect grammar mistakes :,))

It's another normal day in Fontaine, people going into the court as the sun shines brightly then after they are now greeted with cloudy skies as the rain pours. As usual you stayed in the audience during court trials watching just like the other people. 

By this time, after the court trial has finished, all the people from the audience should have gone their separate ways, even you too. However, this time It’s mostly you that is left behind looking at the rain with fascination. Your right hand grips on the umbrella as you stick out your left hand to feel the rain. ‘Huh.. the rain is much stronger today.. I mean I don't blame the hydro dragon, the topic is kinda on the deep side’ you internally told yourself.

You suddenly heard a deep voice approaching you, one that is so familiar, “everyone is now gone, I am curious as to why you are still here?” You turn your back to see the chief justice approaching you getting drenched in the rain at the same time, you immediately run towards him to share your umbrella “Monsieur Neuvillette! well.. I just wanted to look at the rain as it calms me down heh..” suddenly the ground is more interesting to look at.

“Calms you down?” Neuvillette asks curiously. A smile formed on your face “yeah, the sound of the rain makes me feel at ease” Silence now falls between you too. It wasn't awkward unlike the first few times when you two talked before the court trial started. It became comforting and you hope he felt the same way.

“Monsieur Neuvillette-” “Neuvillette” He cuts you off. You looked at him seeking for an explanation “Just call me Neuvillette, We are not inside of the court so honorifics are not much needed” 'Lie' that is such a big lie, even outside the courtroom people still call him Monsieur Neuvillette. But for you he can let that aside just for you. 

“Fine, you can just call me by my given name instead of Mademoiselle but yeah anyways what was I about to say?” you tapped your foot as you started thinking what you were about to say and Neuvillette remembers that tiny gesture you do when you think and he wonders how does he remember them and why?

You stop tapping your feet when you remember what to say. You look at him in the eyes as you ask, “Neuvillette, Do you wanna dance in the rain with me?” Neuvillette was taken aback from the question and hearing you saying his name without honorifics sounds much better to him for some reason. “Well y/n, I am drenched from the rain-” you suddenly dropped your umbrella to cut him off from continuing his reasoning then grabbed his hand and did a twirl. You then whispered in his ear "Both of us are gonna get drenched from the rain anyways”.

While you two danced, the strong rain had suddenly stopped and as for some of the people that passed by and saw you and the cold chief justice dancing in the rain. Neuvillette couldn't care less. He is just happy to be with you at this moment.

[unique-high]

Keep Wanting You | RIIZE ANTON X BLK FEM READER.

summary: why you gotta make me keep wanting you?

theme: ex-lovers in a small town.

loosely based on the song Why Ya Wanna by Jana Kramer. Lyrics are sort of written into the fic.

a/n: I do take requests for RIIZE so yeah. 😭 this is just a little drabble I did it late in the morning because I really love this song and I really wanted to write something for Anton. 🥺 sorry for any mistakes.

You didn't expect for your ex Anton to walk through those diner doors that late August afternoon. So all the gossip around town was true that he was back in town. He's the only person from high school who left this little hometown to chase his big dreams in a big city. He's chatting with some older people who watched him grow up as a kid. You were hoping he didn't notice you, but he does, that little glimpse he gives you while he's talking with someone makes your heart sink to your stomach.

Why did he have to come here, of all places?

Anton walks up to your table. He's smiling and your heart is breaking like the night he left you behind in this town. You want to hide your face, your eyes sting as you try to fight back the tears with a fake smile.

He's wearing an old shirt that you love. A cotton white tee with a black heart sewn into the front pocket. You were never sure why you loved that shirt on him, but you did. Anton sat across from you, his eyes taking you in.

“You're looking good,” he said.

His words felt like a punch to the gut. No hello. No, how you have been. Just you're looking good. It was kind of his way to draw you in a bit to make you trust him again and to get you to think he's leaving was never a big deal.

“Thanks...?” you said softly.

He reached across the table, his index finger tapping three times on the back of your hand. Three little taps coded for ‘I love you’, something you and Anton came up with back in high school.

You slowly drew your hand away.

“It's been a while,” he said.

“Yeah...it has...”

“You never left this place.” There's a bit of regret stuck in his throat.

“Why would I?” Your words are icy. “This place is all I know.”

“Don't you want to see something else outside of our hometown?”

“No... Not really.”

Seeing anything else didn't feel right. That safety of where home would always be kept you nestled in this town. And you never saw why Anton would want to leave a place that felt like a comforting hug after a long day. Or just suddenly leave you for some dream right after graduation. God, you were glad he wasn't here to see those first couple of months when you were a mess behind him.

So seeing him now, just having him sit across from you like everything was fine, slowly opened those wounds that didn't quite heal up enough.

“Is it wrong of me to say I've missed you?” he said.

You look down at your coffee mug. Your reflection staring back at you in the black coffee with a few cubes of sugar in it.

“Do you really?” Your voice creaks on the way up your throat.

Anton doesn't say anything for a moment. Maybe because it was selfish of him to say something like that. Like what right did he have to you now?

“Yeah. Mainly you're one reason I'm back here,” he said.

Him saying that caused you physical pain.

Was I really? Your red nails tapped at the side of the coffee mug. It would be a lie if you said you didn't miss him. If you didn't think about him all these years later. If you hadn't checked his Instagram a billion times to see if he had moved on. Just flings here and there, but nothing serious. The girls in the city could never compare to the one small-town girl that he still loved.

So he fucked up by leaving you.

“Anton, don't say something you don't mean.” You pleaded. “Don't okay?”

You look up from your coffee.

“I mean it though.” He said. “I mean it with every heartbeat.”

The corners of your mouth pull down and your eyes water. You grabbed a napkin from the middle of the table and dabbed at your eyes, trying not to ruin your makeup.

“I need to go.” You said.

Because things were getting too real. If he said anything else, you would have maybe done the one thing you said you'd never do, which was forgive him.

You slid out of the booth and so did Anton. You placed a couple of dollars on the table for your coffee. Anton follows you out of the diner. You stopped walking.

“Don't follow me–” It's the way he moved in for a hug that caught you off guard.

What was he thinking? You let it happen. You deep down you wanted it though. It's a shame almost you craved his hug. How you melt against his body, how his arms tighten around your shoulders, your face in his chest smelling him. You were coming unglued.

It's sad how you wanted him again to go back to the familiarities of his love like he never broke your heart when he said goodbye. And God, how you wished he had been cold towards you like any ex would. But that wasn't him.

You needed to push him away. You needed to yell at him that this wasn't fair—that he doesn't get to do this to you. Hell, you can't bring yourself to do any of it. It felt so right with him right now.

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

i want to respond to a lot of them because theres so many good points on my Peter posts that I wanna expand on

but some of the replies are deadass just people saying 'No Peter is an idiot. He's a doofus, his watch going off was an accident. He's a dummy'

and I'm like

If you think that Peter giving Miles away was an accident, and Peter is just an idiot-

Being an idiot is not a very good trait to be defending. Especially if you're implying he's so incompetent he endangered Miles' life.

[I wrote here why I think this scene is completely intentional and Peter ratted Miles out on purpose - based on his behavior with MayDay, Lyla, and Miles

But that's not what I'm talking about right now. But maybe read that first.]

I've gotten many a response saying 'No, this scene is just an accident. Peter didn't mean to give him up. Peter is a dummy/idiot.'

Completely valid interpretation and conclusion based on the information shown on screen. I don't agree with it, but it's an assumption that's easy to make

That being said -

....what?! LIKE WHAT? Do you hear yourself?

You're like "Yeah this grown ass man is a complete idiot and gave Miles away which led to Miguel whooping Miles' ass. Peter, a man who has been Spider-man for years, is so dumb that he wouldn't think to turn off his tracking bracelet. Opps, must've slipped his mind the multiverse tracking bracelet did that tracking thing."

that's not???? that's not oKAY????

that's not any better!! That's your mans? The dum-dum who got Miles beat up because he didn't think about the tracking bracelet on his arm?? To either turn it off or take it off???

In this situation -

Peter is either playing dumb or he actually IS DUMB.

And we need to start holding the white man accountable for how his stupidity endangers others.

Like he could have helped Miles escape from the get go instead of trying to talk to him and make jokes about him holding Mayday. Even though he knows that Miles is in danger, suddenly he's joking and laughing with him?

Okay. Bizarre behavior but okay.

But by saying 'his watch went off on accident (and Lyla, an AI not subjected to human mistakes, just decided to rat herself out - out loud - okay)' you're admitting that Peter is basically incompetent.

So much so that he's an active danger around Miles.

By suggesting he DIDN'T rat on Miles, you're implying that he either

Didn't know his watch could track him - UNLIKELY or

He knew it could track him but he didn't think to turn it off when talking to Miles - NEGLIGENT OR

The watch could only track him if it was triggered it and he accidentally hit it - STILL IMCOMPETENT. OR

The tracking cannot be turned off - TAKE OFF THE BRACELET FOR LIKE TWO MINUTES.

All of these options make Peter look bad.

We have to assume that Peter knows that Lyla can track him.

If he really didn't want Miles to be found out, any person with any kinda sense and competence would turn off their watch or location.

Excusing this as 'Peter is dumb', you're admitting that a grown man who has been Spider-man for years didn't think to disable the tracking bracelet that can obviously track him anywhere in the multiverse.

Especially for those that think he hit it by accident and didn't notice until the last moment??

Despite the fact that he's had a watch longer than most - if not all of -the other Spider people besides Miguel???????????

Like, That means he didn't think at all during their entire interaction - 'Wait, Hold up. If I don't want Miles to get caught, I should turn off my watch.'

You think Peter B. Parker is that damn dumb? And that sits right with you??

Or...There's my theory.

He wanted Miles to get caught so he left his watch on and triggered it. Simple as that.

He knew the watch could track him.

He knew this and didn't turn it off. When he realized Miles couldn't be reasoned with, he triggered Lyla and asked her to track him. He stalled Miles, and then Lyla responded to him, not knowing doing so would rat him out.

(Remember, Lyla has no reason to rat herself or Peter out. And for Lyla it's a lot harder to argue it was a mistake or an intentional thing to mess with the Society. Because she's an AI. She wouldn't make a human mistake like that, as far as we can see, she's strictly bound by logical code and protocol. And she doesn't really have the agency to just turn on Miguel and the society to rat PETER out intentionally. She's an AI. Not a person. Lyla wouldn't speak suddenly if she knew that Peter didn't know he was being tracked. It's more likely he spoke to her first, and she responded out loud because of that.)

But my theory isn't law.

It's really just an assumption and analysis based on these things here, the scenes we're shown, what we know about Peter, and what we know about The Society/Lyla.

You don't have to go with my theory.

But if your argument is that Lyla getting his location is an accident and Peter was just too dumb to turn off the watch before he spoke to Miles-

That's still not a justification.

Also, Peter is acting BIZARRE here.

You're admitting Peter is an idiot. He got Miles caught because of his stupidity.

But by saying this was all an accident - you're also implying THIS joke was completely sincere.

Why would a grown man be joking at a time like this?

Any body would know to not start laughing and joking at a time like this - when Miles needs to get out of there as soon as possible.

Either he cannot read the situation - which..he knows Miles is in like active physical danger so - or he's acting abnormally and joking because he's actively stalling Miles.

Either he's PLAYING dumb or he IS dumb.

L's ALL ACROSS THE BOARDDDDD.

Either option is horrible for Peter.

Maybe he didn't think to turn off his tracking bracelet. Maybe he did trigger it by accident and didn't notice.

That's a completely valid interpretation - just know that in arguing so you're implying the person you're defending is just dumb as all hell.

So dumb he's a danger to the people around him.

You can take this stance, but in my eyes the stance is still very damning upon Peter.

A grown man who has been in The Society for months, should know to turn his watch off. He should KNOW not to be joking at a time like this.

Maybe he did it with ulterior motives, like intentionally ratting Miles out.

Maybe the man that was fine with physically restraining Miles with webs on-screen in ITSV IS fine with cornering Miles in a small space.

Or maybe he IS just an idiot. Which is..... not good. It's actually pretty sad and it still makes me think that Peter B. should not be around these kids if he can't think to NOT endanger them MORE on accident.

But HEY.

If you think Peter B. is an idiot, I will not argue. We agree on that, TRUST.

But I'm still gonna treat him like an adult who can stop and think for one second about the tracker on his arm, and just assumes not THAT dumb, and instead he did it on purpose.

Cause that man cannot be than damn dumb, come on.

Still. Fuck Peter B. ALL MY HOBIES HATE PETER B. (not a typo)

In this house we will hold him accountable. Whether for his betrayal OR his stupidity. At the end of the day, it got Miles hurt.

But yeah that's my take on the stance.

Bye.

[hope-to-hell]

Winter’s bite. Helmut Zemo x Reader. Smut, bondage, s/m dynamics, brief wounds/broken bones, post-unsnapping. This is a conversation, a persuasion, an attack on dignity and a breaking-open of the hollows left inside those who were gone-then-not. Zemo has some trouble dealing with loss.

—-

Hey, yeah, listen. I know it’s been a while, and I guess maybe you’re not so thrilled to see me but here we are and you said talk, so I’m gonna talk and you’re gonna listen; maybe you’ll find those little tells you’re hoping for. There’s been all this running and hiding and yeah, sure, a little bit of dying— but don’t hold it against me. It’s like this: here one minute and gone the next, which doesn’t matter much because if you’re nothing then you’ve got nothing to worry about, ya dig?

Well. Until everyone and their dog gets unsnapped and suddenly you’re looking at your own shinbones all wet and sticky because you were thirty feet up the side of a building that doesn’t exist anymore. Listen, I didn’t want to see my own marrow and I know you don’t want to hear about it either, but I’m one of the lucky ones. Lot of people were falling out of the sky, you know. They came back but their airplanes didn’t. And there’s others, too: so many of us were in the wrong place all of a sudden, part of the miraculous rebirth for less than a heartbeat before dying in some stupid way or other.

Maybe we just should’ve stayed gone. Maybe then there’d be at least an ending even if there was never any closure, but like. Coming back has been this weird no-man’s-land where I’m legally dead, physically alive, and mentally still five years in the past. So yeah. Maybe bringing us back was a mistake. Z doesn’t agree, but then again he’s real close with loss; he wears it on his chest in bloody ribbons and he’ll tell you no no, nothing personal, don’t take it so hard when he’s stepping on your neck. ‘Course it’s personal, though. It always is with him: he’ll take your eye for a slight, and for losing a loved one? Christ, he’ll burn the world. Don’t make him angry, and for fucksake don’t take from him, because he’s got a long memory and a hell of a lot of imagination in the whole pain-and-suffering department.

So anyway. I’m laying there with pins in my legs and my ears all full of beep beep beep every time my vitals go a little wacky, and this motherfucker comes strolling in with a face like he’s filing taxes— you know, that neutral if I must with just a tinge of murder underneath— and all he says is hmm. No hi how are you, no thank the stars you’re safe, just that look. He’s gonna take whatever’s in his head and let it eat at him until it all comes pouring out, and when it does— oh, it’s really gonna be something.

Like now.

Do you know why you’re here? he’s asking, but it’s not a question, not really. It’s a trap. Not like there’s anything to do but see this through; he’s real fucking good with rope and he’s made sure to get the knots right over the most painful pressure points. And it’s cold; everything he says hangs solid in the air, like he could grab hold of his you were gone, you left and drive it deep, past bone and meat right down to where my heart’s beating hard enough to crack ribs, and listen. Listen. Fuck. I know maybe this part makes you feel all icky but you’re gonna hear it anyway. And hell, maybe it’ll get you feeling all antsy. Maybe you’ll be jerking off to this in the middle of the night. I don’t mind.

I just wanna make sure you know he waited til all my bones were knitted together, all those strands of shredded muscle repaired and revitalized— and I don’t want to see another treadmill as long as I live; I walked backwards on that fucking thing for hours— he waited with the patience of a thousand fallen saints so he could wake me up one midnight with his gloved hand heavy over my mouth and and his breath carrying ice into my ear. You are well, he said, like he was talking about the weather, but you know it’s always winter wherever he goes. You are well, you are whole, but through all those years there was a rift in the world in the shape of your flesh.

So, anyway. Buckle up, big guy; I know you’re desperate to know where he’s gone, and I know it’s more than anger, more than vengeance; you think I can’t see it but it’s all over your face. You’re not as good a liar as you ought to be after— well. Don’t let me get off track here, not when I’m about to get to the juicy part. Now, where was I? Right.

So there I am buck-ass naked— ha— with my knees going all pitted from kneeling on concrete, tied up tighter than anything, and he’s even got mirrors all around because you know how Z is. You know he wants you to see exactly what he’s doing to you from every angle but it’s more than that: this way he can see the effect of every little thing he does, every tiny detail he adds to make sure he’s got you exactly where he wants you to be. If I could move enough to look down, I bet I’d see rice all over the floor, though I wouldn’t be surprised if it was thousands of tiny garnets. Like I said, details. If he’s gonna make it hurt, you can bet he’ll do it beautifully.

Have you ever been fingered by a man in leather gloves? Listen. It’s— it’s a lot, especially when he’s crouched down right there with me, one hand wrapped around the ropes at my back and the other one two fingers deep and thrusting hard. No warmup, no preamble, just the sound of his boots, then that nasty spit-slicked do you understand grief? Have you felt the bile that chokes, or the bruises that bloom across your ribcage from the inside?

Five years. Maybe I can’t fathom it, but fuck can I ever feel it; the next time he moves that hand there’s another finger and he’s got to be spreading them wide as he can because between that and the leather I’m gonna split apart. Five years. Can you picture it? God, I hope you can. I hope you think about it later, when you’re alone and needing to get off so bad. Maybe I’ll think about you thinking about me and him, touching myself and feeling your eyes on me even from another room. Would you like that? Or would you like it better if I was bound, squirming and helpless, desperate for what I can’t have?

Either way, I want this right at the front of your mind: Zemo with his punishing hands, composure in shreds, pulling me apart from the inside and neither of us has any words left, just these snarls and whimpers all mixed together til it doesn’t matter who they’re coming from anymore. He made me come, of course he did; he ripped it right out of me with a twist and shove, every bruise tied together with this bright-burning silver thread.

You know I couldn’t help leaving; we’re alike in that regard, but has anyone ever given you what you’ve needed so badly since you came back? No. I can see it: you’re so full of guilt you haven’t earned, and sorrows you haven’t let yourself begin to feel. But you can take that rawness and put it to work; you’re a good man who got a bad deal and you have to know that. I see it; he sees it.

He’s on his way; any minute now those doors will open and he’ll be there with that half-smile, the one that says I’ve got a little secret; for all your efforts, you can’t find him until he wants to be found. You’ll see him dressed for the cold, rubbing his thumb over the knuckles of his left hand. It’ll look artless, casual, but you know what it’ll mean. He’ll make you an offer— and you really, really oughta take it. After all, I wouldn’t have come here if it wasn’t worthwhile. And yeah, I know you were expecting to have to pry it out of me, maybe reach down deep for those parts of you that you wish you’d burned away, the parts of you that get answers out of tight lips, but here we are. Everything is on the table— well, not everything; there’s got to be something left for later, but I think you’ll find it in your favor— and everything I’ve said tonight is true.

It still aches, even now. I can still feel the stitching along the sides of his fingers, not to mention all those tiny pocked bruises on my knees, all those knots pressed deep, his coat buttons imprinted on my spine from where he fell against my back and let his words fall wetly on me. I will move heaven and earth to keep you here. You mustn’t doubt that. And I believe him, James. I really do.

[the1975attheirverybest]

Date Night

A/N: second installment of Fwb Matty. Based on this and included a few different things we talked about yesterday. Let me know what you think!

Warnings: smut, very mild angst. Some sub-ish Matty? Do we like him? Prefer dom!Matty? Both? Neither? Thoughts?

———

“You’re late.” Her eyes sized him up, hand on her hip, heel tapping against the floor.

Matty knew he’d fucked up, but it was an honest mistake. He’d genuinely lost track of time. After a long week of getting nowhere with producing his new record, just as he was about to leave, a lightbulb went off in his head and he had to see it through. He had no idea the restaurant would have closed by the time that he remembered to look up from his desk.

“I- I know. Sorry-“ he moved to walk through her doorway but her body didn’t budge. She wouldn’t let him in.

Matty’s face betrayed him. His remorse, and the surprise at her reaction, written all over his features. “You gonna let me in?” He asked a bit hesitant.

“Why should I?” She sighed, not giving him a chance to answer before she spoke again. “Do you remember WHY you set up this dinner in the first place?”

“Look, I said I’m sorry-“

“I asked you a question.”

“I- I do remember. Your date blew you off and…I said I’d take you out. Show you how you’re meant to be treated.”

“Yeah, you really fuckin’ nailed it, didn’t you?” She looked away from him at the passersby, suddenly aware the people on the street were subjected to their fight.

“I’m sorry, okay? Now let me in so I can explain.”

“Matty it’s almost midnight. Just go home. I don’t wanna hear it.” She spoke softer. Her arms wrapping around her torso defensively.

“ just- let me in and we can talk. Hmm?” Matty stepped forward, she turned around and walked in, finally giving him the space to slide through the door and shut it behind him.

“You know what? I’m not doing this. I’m going to bed. Stay, leave, it’s really up to you.”

He rushed behind her, grabbing her arm. “I was in the studio okay?! I had work to do! I couldn’t just drop it and leave! It’s not the kind of thing that I can just pick back up the next day. I had to see this through. And maybe if you weren’t so keen on being angry, you’d understand. My job- it’s different.”

“Oh, yeah, sorry. Forgot. You’re a genius. the rules don’t apply to you!”

She was pushing his buttons. He absolutely hated when anyone compared his personal tendencies to the self-important musician types who glorified their own “genius.”

“The fuck is the matter with you? I didn’t say that. I don’t care!”

“Yes, you don’t care. You’ve made that very clear. How little you care about my time and my feelings. You had to work? Fine. I get that. Couldn’t even spare me a text? Postpone? Let me know you’re not fucking coming so I don’t spend my whole fucking night waiting around for you like a fool in this stupid outfit and- just- you don’t get it. You never will.” She pried her arm out of his hold and walked down the hall.

Matty ran his fingers through his hair, huffing in frustration. “Your ego’s just bruised cuz of that dickhead who pied you off. ‘S the only reason we’re even havin’ this conversation right now.”He shot back, saying exactly the right words to get a rise of her.

“Get the fuck out. Out! Now!” She shoved him with all the strength she could muster and he almost tripped backwards.

“Fine. Don’t have to tell me twice.”

Before Matty made it to her front door, he heard her slam the bedroom door shut, and begin to cry.

“Fuck me.” He whispered under his breath, his hand on the apartment doorknob.

***

Matty had been standing in front of her bedroom door for ages. Listening to her sniffle and cry in there. All alone. And kicking himself for how insensitive he’d been. He wanted to go in there and apologize immediately, but he was afraid that if he opened his mouth again, he’d only make things worse. He took a deep breath, steadying himself, and knocked on her door.

“Go away, Matty!”

“No! I mean- respectfully, I- I’m not going anywhere. May I come in?”

He took her silence as a yes and opened the door hesitantly, peaking his head through the small crack. The sight that his eyes landed on made his stomach turn.

In the dim light of the bedside lamp, he saw her sitting at the edge of the bed, makeup colored tear stains running down her face. “Oh, darlin’ I’m so sorry.”

She covered her face with her hands, sobbing into her palms and dreading having to talk to him.

Matty moved towards her slowly and delicately, whispering apologies and hoping she’d look at him. He crouched down on the floor, sitting on his knees and reached for her hands.

“Please, look at me. Please?” He pulled at her wrists, prying her hands away from her face and wiping her tears gently with the back of his hand. “I’m sorry. Yeah? Sorry. Really. What I did- no excuses. And what I said to you was awful.”

She made several failed attempts to stop her crying. Mumbling incoherently. “I- I’m- don’t- it’s no big deal.” She sighed, letting her tears fall onto his hands.

“Yes it is.”

“N-no. You are not the first or last person on the planet to forget about a dinner plan with a friend. Don’t know why I’m being so dramatic.”

“You’re not being dramatic. I gave you my word. Told you I’d show you how you ought to expect guys to treat you, and then I went and- and fuckin abandoned you! What kind of friend does that?”

Her eyes finally met his. She could see the regret all over his face. Matty was good at arguing his way out of anything. He had a smart mouth on him, and that charming smile that would bring anyone to their knees. But, this, right now, was different. It was him who was on his knees. And she believed every word that he said.

“I- I really did want to spend the evening with you. I promise. Time just- got away from me.”

She smiled softly. “Yeah,” nodding. “I know how you get when you’re in the zone.”

His face relaxed. “Yeah, but that’s no excuse. I- could’ve at least texted. Just didn’t realize how much time had gone by. Came over as soon as I noticed. Please forgive me?”

Matty rested his head in her lap. “Gosh. Look at the dress you’re wearing. You made an effort. Went to all this trouble.”

She nodded, righteous indignation suddenly hitting her again. “I did. Actually tried to look nice. Thought you would too. I mean, I know it was a little little friend date, but, with my tragic dating history…I don’t know. I was excited not to have to be nervous or pretend to be someone I’m not. Cuz it’d be just us. Just you and me.”

Every word she spoke shot daggers into Matty’s heart. He’d all but crushed her sprit. “I’m such a fuckin’ idiot. Oh, gosh. Please lemme make it up to you. Tonight! Like, right now! I’ll get us dinner. Or, if it’s too late, I’ll cook for you.” He looked up at her, his eyes silently begging.

She paused for a moment, thinking, and taking in his compromised position, when an idea popped into her head. “I have a better idea.” A devilish smile crept on her face.

***

“Ahh! Ahh- hurts. Baby, it hurtsss” Matty cried out, fighting the tears that formed in the corners of his eyes. She’s been touching him for what felt like hours. Waiting for him to get right to the edge, and then stopping just as he starts to feel good. He was now beyond sensitive. Every inch on his skin feeling hot as fire. He was certain his sweat had drenched the bedsheets, and, more than anything, he was feeling a bit light-headed.

“Do you wanna stop?” She asked, her hand hovering dangerously close, but not quite touching him.

Matty stared at her mutely, trying to think through his answer, but his head was scrambled, his eyes glassy. He wasn’t entirely sure she was present. If they stop, the torture goes away. But, he knew she was having fun. And this was about her, not him. “W-wanna- make you happy. Wanna be good. For you.”

That was all she needed to hear. She went back to pumping him, mercilessly.

“Ah! Fuck! That’s - in-intense! Can I cum now? Please? Can I?”

“Not yet. Matty, don’t you dare.”

“I won’t, I won’t, I promise!” He repeated over and over.

Once again, just as he felt a hot wave of pleasure rush over him, she took her touch away, leaving him writhing. “Fuckkkk- that hurts!!” He yelled out. Tears finally streaming down his face. She stared at him for a long while, seemingly hypnotized by the sight of him so uncontrolled. His chest rising and falling, flushed and red all over, sweat dropping down his body, curving at his muscles; his hair splayed over the pillow, his eyes red and watering, his lips red and bitten over. He was perfect.

She placed a gentle hand on his cheek and he titled his head slightly to kiss it.

“You doing okay, Matty?”

“Dizzy.” He mumbled. He loved when she said his name.

“We should stop then.” She tore herself away from him to pull his boxers back over his legs. For a brief moment, she saw a look flash over his eyes and thought she’d hear a flood of complaints. That she’s put him through all this for nothing. That he had to cum at the end. That this wasn’t fair. But, Matty said nothing.

“Can I get you anything? Some water? You look out of it. You feeling alright?”

It took him a moment to muster some strength, but he eventually smiled softly. “D-did you, umm, have fun?”

“Yeah, plenty of fun.”

“Then- uh, yeah. I’m okay.” Matty sighed, closing his eyes for a second, before opening them again to look up at her. “Can I- could I stay the night? Please?”

“Of course, Matty. Always.” She placed a quick peck on his lips before scrambling to her feet to grab him some water and a change of clothes. “Think I’ve got some of your clothes around here somewhere.”

“Uh, hey, are you still mad at me? I mean- forgive me?” Matty mumbled into the duvet as she pulled it over his body.

“Oh, Matty, I forgave you before we even started.”

“Yeah?”

“Would’ve forgiven you, either way. That’s the wild thing about you, mate. Can never stay mad at you.”

[onlythebravest]

okay, so, me and @hard4softthings had a very brief discussion about insecure trevor and, well, inspiration struck? so here are 870 words of insecure trevor. enjoy!

psst, look over here, it’s also on ao3 now if you want to show it some love over there

this is so not edited and written in under two hours so please feel free to ignore any and all mistakes, thank you

Trevor and Jamie are sitting outside one of their usual post-training smoothie shops, sipping on a smoothie each. Trevor is splayed over his chair, leaning back with his legs spread wide, talking about something Jamie has to admit he lost track of. Honestly, he’s just waiting for an opening to ask the question he had invited Trevor out to ask.

There is a short break when Trevor is taking a few sips of his smoothie and Jamie jumps on it, “Do you have a place to live yet?”

“No, dude,” Trevor replies, head thrown back as he groans loud enough for the people at the table next to them to look over. He looks up at Jamie again. “You?”

Jamie shakes his head. “Wanna look for a place together?”

“Wanna be roomies again, Jimmy Dimmy?” Trevor waggles his brows and Jamie shakes his head both at how stupid he looks but also at the equally stupid nickname. It’s a new one, though, so he gets points for creativity.

“Yeah.” Jamie shrugs. “I liked living with you the first year. We fit well, don’t you think? And I know you hate being alone, so I was thinking, why not?”

The response he gets isn’t one he expects, because Trevor suddenly folds himself in, making himself a bit smaller. Not hunching his shoulders smaller, just taking up less space smaller.

“I’d love to be roommates again,” Trevor begins. Jamie senses a but coming and waits. “It’s just that.” Trevor puts his smoothie down and adjusts his hat, pulling at a loose strand of his hair. “I’m different. At home, I mean. If we’re gonna live together.”

“I know that,” Jamie says, confused. “We’ve already lived together, remember?”

“Yeah, but that was different. I’m gonna be more different.” Trevor rolls his drink between his hands as he talks. “I wasn’t, I didn’t, it’s just.” He shakes his head. “I’m gonna act different. More different. I won’t be like this, and like, I’ll talk less.”

Jamie chuckles. “You mean I’ll get the chance to talk sometimes? I won’t complain about that.”

Trevor lets put a frustrated sigh, pulls his hat off and runs a hand through his hair before pulling it back on. “No, it’s, I.” Another sigh. “I’ll be —”

Trevor grimaces. He takes a sip from his smoothie, chews a bit on the straw before taking another one.

Jamie breaks the silence Trevor is dragging out between them, “You know, if you don’t want to live together you can just say so. I won’t be offended or anything.”

“I do!” Trevor looks at him earnestly as he repeats, “I do want to live with you. It’s not that.”

“What is it then?”

“I guess I’m just scared you won’t like me anymore,” Trevor finally mumbles. He talks around his straw, so it takes Jamie a second to decipher what he said, and then another two to process what he said.

“What?” He exclaims when he realizes what Trevor said. “Where —” he shakes his head in confusion “— where is this coming from? Of course, I’ll still like you, Trevor.”

“But it’s gonna be different from the first year. I feel safer around you now, I’m gonna relax in a different way. You’ll see, I’m gonna.” He purses his lips and seems to force the next sentence out, “You’re gonna see some really ugly sides because I’ll feel so comfortable with you that I’ll be too relaxed to hide them.”

Jamie blinks. Blinks again. “Have you been changing how you act around me?” he asks, horrified.

“Not much! I’ve just… hidden some things, I guess you can call it

“But why?”

“Well, at first it was because I was nervous. Around the team but also, you were so good, Jim, I really wanted you to like me. And when I felt more comfortable and started to relax, everyone already had these expectations of how I should act, so I just continued.”

“My god, Trevor.” Jamie took his hat off and shook his hair, letting the light breezes of wind run through his hair. “You don’t have to keep up some kind of act. The boys don’t want you to be someone you’re not, they want you to be you.”

“It’s not like that, I’m still me. I’m just not always this loud and hyper and whatever.”

“You don’t have to be ‘on’ all the time.”

Trevor shrugs. “They’ll just be confused if I suddenly stop talking now.”

Jamie rolls his eyes. “I doubt you’ll turn into some shy rookie who says one word an hour, I think you’ll be fine.”

Trevor is quiet for a little moment, then he leans back and spreads himself out against the chair again and says in his usual loud voice, “And you’ll have my back if they don’t, won’t you Jimmy boy?”

Jamie huffs a laugh, shaking his head at how quickly Trevor reverted to his, apparently exaggerated, loud self.

“That enough feelings for you, bud?”

Trevor dramatically throws himself forward at the table. “For a lifetime, babe, a lifetime!”

Jamie decides not to call him out on the act and just asks, “So? Living together?”

“As long as you promise to love me to the end of days.”

[euroquision]

EuroQuision is no longer active (...sort of)

Hello friends! It has been only 5 days since I've had to peace the f*ck out of Twitterland, the odorous theme park with more bots than Disney has animatronics. After making the mistake of trying to speak critically of all presidential options and instead emphasizing the relevance of local and state elections, my once-reliable and loveably problematic community turned full Blue Conservative and came to the following conclusions about me in a span of 48 hours:

I'm a Russia-sympathizer / trying to spread pro-Russia propaganda

I do not care about the rights of any woman, non-white person, or queer/trans citizen of the US

I want Tr*mp to win the election

And all in all ppl agreeing that I was at one time bearable, but now am just annoying and braindead

How did we come to those four conclusions? Well, points 2, 3, and 4 all came from the very act of stating I won't vote for Kamala or any presidential candidate and will only instead focus my online discussion on politics about local and state elections. Point number 1 was because I also had the *audacity* to suggest Jill Stein as a 3rd party candidate after so many Liberal followers of mine kept complaining for "another option if you hate Kamala so much." Little did I know that Jill Stein has said and done some pretty Russia-sympathetic things in the past. But even though I did not know this whatsoever until July 23rd, people took that and ran, saying I'm a Russia supporter or propagating for them. Now, the very fact that people who have followed me for YEARS could think that's suddenly true really tells me what kind of "crowd" we're dealing with on Twitter. Despite the fact the twitter eurofan community has on-record been wonderful, welcoming, proactive, and geopolitically aware, I'm reminded that no community is going to be perfect, and the kind of political discussions I have with people in the world is not the convo Twitter eurofans want to have. So even though my feelings were deeply hurt and I legitimately mourned the loss of what I wanted to continue being a growing thing now being lost. But a few very smart, emotionally mature people in my life reached out to me and helped reassure me that despite the chaos, things said about me for the intention of just being awful aren't true.

Anyway, that's the only time I wanna waste talking about twitter, because I'm someone who talks my shit and stands on it too. Yeah, sometimes my shit will stink, and I can admit that when it does. I am not immune to the behavior I just faced; I've been there too dunking on people who deserve it -- like Adam or Shawn from EuroTikTok hopping the pond to tell everyone on twitter they suck and then getting mad when ppl don't like that and dunk on them back. However, on a topic like this and with so much deliberate misunderstanding fueling the snide indignation from people who would've called me "bestie" a day earlier feels *different.* So different to the point where I legitimately considered wiping EuroQuision from the internet. But I chose not to, and here's why!

First, I think there needs to be as much tangible, shareable evidence of public scrutiny of systems of power that are corrupt, and that goes for the ridiculous circus that is Eurovision. Ppl will be so quick to call it "unserious" while ignoring countries put millions of dollars into this every year. Last I checked, gov'ts don't pour money like that into something "unserious." There's a reason Eurovision is as big as it is and how the inclusion of "Israel" is so monumentally complicated. So I want the internet, for as long as possible, to be something that can contain the evidence of people saying "I disagree with the EBU's decisions about these world events. I disagree with their treatment of colonized populations and prioritizing of safeguarding European/White optics and feelings throughout its entire history." And even though good things have genuinely come from ESC's existence (globalization, musical/cultural expression, Ukraine's 2016 win, etc), we can see ESC 2024 itself as an example how in the bubble of ESC, the show itself will only let you remember the good parts. No live show will E V E R dare to show the footage of HATARI in the 2019 televote, and we know the EBU will deplatform their own Eric Saade for *gasp!* having a scarf on his wrist. ESC history is *revisionist* history, and the crowd on twitter only seems to be temporarily concerned about that.

So yeah, inevitably I came to the conclusion that every human must come to: Twitter ain't it, like goddamn. But I'm only here to say that once and move on with my life because despite my final tweet and deactivation of my Patreon, EuroQuision is NOT gone and will not actually be stopping. Consider this a shift in scope and purpose, along with reprioritizing my real life responsibilities. Firstly, about the Patreon: I deactivated it and more than likely will not make another in the future purely because I know that in the future, EQ cannot keep up the production schedule needed to make what I wanted to make and promise to deliver to people like I want. Most importantly, I want to create things for EQ without the additional pressure of trying to cultivate, retain, and reward a growing audience when I know I won't be able to maintain that long term. This way there's less pressure on myself, and I will develop a better relationship with it all.

So, what's EuroQuision gonna be now? Well, it's not really gonna be a "fan" account, mostly considering I have no reason to be a "fan" or Eurovision from here on out/until some drastic changes are made. Instead, I wanna continue being a wide variety of things: musical analyst, historian, fun-fact-provider, overall nerd, and most of all: Protester. To put it into context: I currently have two YouTube video essays; one about the boycott, and one about nightcore. Even though I deeply love both videos and am proud of the effort I put into them, I can easily say which one was worth the time and effort. No shame to my Nightcore roots, but I think the more "important" topics are going to be what I dedicate my YouTube real estate to in the future. On that note, I'll also be on tumblr and reddit much more! I truly love writing and discussing Eurovision at length, and not over quips and punches in the form of 200-ish character tweets. I have too much to say and we can also see the ways communication is truncated by-design thanks to Twitter, and therefore incidents like the one we went through up above are likely to happen.

I wanna end this VERY long post off with a very specific declaration of a couple things that will never change from the EQ name: Free Palestine now and forever. Free Ukraine, Sudan, Congo, EVERY country and person put in harm's way because of the American empire. I do not enable fascism to remedy fascism, and my practiced ethics will always prioritize my community, my family, and the people around the world my elected leaders tell me I should hate. I will continue to donate 100% of my TikTok revenue and possible YouTube revenue to Palestinian relief funds. I do not support the financial or social support/apologism of the EBU.

Anyway, I think I covered all my bases, and if you're someone who disagrees with any stance or belief I've stated in this thesis (lol), kindly just allow yourself to unfollow/not engage with me. Tumblr and Reddit will be around for my ramblings and theories. As for YouTube, I can tell you now that I have a LARGE video essay in the works right now. Literally NO idea when it'll be done/released, but it exists! Thank you for being here, if you still choose to do so!

[caus34concern]

okay so i found the i love play rehearsal demo and i just wanna go over the changes because i'm very normal about christine canigula

"And on the stage when I'm bearing praise of(?) soul / I feel hella in control, but it's not me it's just the role"

this is basically christine saying how all the praise she gets when she's acting makes her feel like she's in control, but in reality, she's basically just acting out someone else's life. this also kinda connects to her line in agtikbi "I don't always relate to other people my age / Except when I'm on the stage". the only time people praise her, the only time she feels connected to others is when she's acting as someone else. not to mention the fact she is filled with a ton of self-doubt and lacks a proper sense of self ("I was trying to be someone else for someone else. And that is not who I wanna be." / "I don't think I should go out with anyone until I figure out who I am...") and only feels confident in herself when acting because when she has a role to act she knows who she's supposed to be.

"If my words were not pre-written for me I'll sometimes fumble awkwardly / Like when I went to fail to ski- There goes my ADD where was I? Ugh!"

this line ties in with the verse before this which was the "Life is easy in rehearsal / You follow a script so you know what comes next" one. she uses theater as a form of escapism because she doesn't have to worry about messing up or making mistakes. everything is planned, there are no surprises. she won't have to worry about suddenly going off-topic into a random tangent because of her adhd if she has a script. christine probably views her life as a mess because of her adhd and while a play is also messy in some ways, it always comes together neatly in the end, unlike her life. which is why she enjoys it. she uses it to get away from her messy life. (also a squip is basically just a script that's in your brain sooo)

there are also a few other minor changes which i think are feel are pretty unimportant but interesting.

"Like the only time I get to be the center of attention" was originally "Like the only time I tend to get attention from the boy" yeah, she does specifically say boy not boys and i'm not entirely sure whether she means jake or jeremy but she seems to have a specific guy she liked at this point. (i'm assuming it's jake and that this song replaces agtikbi meaning it comes after touching my hand where she mentions that jake is a "pretty boy cliche from what i can see, but why is he so interesting to me?")

she also suddenly breaks out into the puck dialogue that jeremy originally says before agtikbi (probably because she originally played puck in the book). which is another reason i feel like this song replaced agtikbi. well, aside from the fact the whole "I guess a part of me likes to, who knew?" part is in this demo.

the ending was also originally "Back to play rehearsal / I know that it's lame, but it's totally true / The reason I love play rehearsal / Is I get to sit and hang and talk / With friends"

[matrixxsystem]

Luck Runs Out Part 4

Leo pulled back the curtain to Donnie's lab with April following behind him and was immediately met with Casey's uh, interesting, music playlist. It was no wonder him and Donnie got along so well, they both liked the kind of mechanical dubstep Donnie always played when he was working on something. Casey was sitting at Donnie's work bench with a pair of goggles on as small sparks flew. He was doing something with the tech inside the mask it seemed.. Leo gave April a look like he wasn't sure if he should bug him or try and wait till he was done. 

"Hey guys. What's up?" Casey called from his seat, causing both April and Leo to look a bit surprised. He turned the music off and lifted the goggles off his head, swiveling in the chair to see them with an awkward smile. "Okay-" Leo started as he took a step forward, "How in the would did you hear us over that?? You were across the room with loud ass music and you were fiddling with your mask thing-"

"I think you forget I grew up in a bunker during the apocalypse Leo-"

"....Fair 'nough- Anyway, we're all going out to get lunch and I'm dragging you with us cause we need more humans to make it look less weird"

"Less weird..? Please tell me you aren't going into town for lunch.. I don't- I mean I just- Y'know-? I'm the last guy you want in your group to make you look normal-" Leo rolled his eyes and threw his arm over Casey's shoulder, "Yes we're going into the city, and you are coming cause we can all use some fresh air. And me and Usagi kinda have this idea.. We want to use the cloaking pins Donnie made and we know my brothers have been kinda weird about using them.. And since you haven't disappeared yet like in those Back from the Future movies we can only assume you're just, here now.. So you have to learn how to be a human in the 2020s" 

"Well, I guess" Casey sighed a little, "I mean Donnie feels pretty bad about sending you alone and then.. You kinda snapped in the government facility and... y'know, killed two people, and wont talk to them about it- And you lost your arm and almost died, like, I helped stich you up after the.. Invasion, and I mean I've seen blood before but that.. It was just a lot for everyone." 

"But I feel bad too-! Like it sucks and I get that, I really do, I'm literally forced to look at my mistakes in the mirror everyday- But those pins don't represent what happened to me and I mean.. If anything, shouldn't the pins represent that I made it out alive, and that we did it? I guess.. I dunno... I just don't want them to feel stuck in the lair like we failed when we didn't. Donnie wanted to go to school and he still hasn't even applied to places around here! Mikey was looking at art schools. It's just.. It's not fair." Casey gave Leos hand a sympathetic pat and pulled away, starting to clean up his space, "I get it, I really do.. It's hard watching the people you care about struggle, or hold themselves back because they don't want to hurt you. Sensei was like that a lot when I was young, I think cause I was really little he kind of, held back when he was around me for some reason, I think he didn't wanna scare me or he thought I was fragile or something? I don't really remember the reason, and I guess it doesn't really matter now.. But the only real things that fixed it between us was time and communication."

"...I don't like how smart you are sometimes haha, but yeah I'm sure part of it is my fault too, maybe that's something we can talk about before we leave, cause I'm sure by now they're onto my plan-" Casey nodded, setting his mask aside, "Yeah, that might be good, I am kind of excited to try some more food from around here, even if that means having to deal with people I guess.. Where are we going again?"

_____

"So.. Where are we going exactly?" Donnie asked, tilting his head at Usagi. "It's a surprise, but you will need your cloaking pins." The air was suddenly a lot more tense when he mentioned the pins, Mikey hesitantly glanced down to the pouch on his hip where his pin was kept. "I uh... Well uh..." Usagi went over at sat on Leos beanbag chair, "It was Leo's idea" He said with a little shrug, "He said he felt bad you guys never use the pins you all worked so hard to get. So we were gonna go have lunch in the city, our treat."

"..He does?" Raph asked, giving his brothers a little glance before sitting in his own beanbag chair, "What... Did he say exactly?" Usagi sat up more and thought for a moment, "Just that, since his little accident and the near invasion where he got hurt again, it feels like you guys tip toe around the pins and he feels bad that you feel like you can't use them, he mentioned that Mikey was looking at studios for various hobbies and Donnie was looking at colleges, even that you Raph might've wanted to get out of the house too but that no ones really done it. And it makes him feel a little sad, since he uses his pin to hang out with me and it doesn't bother him so much." Raph sighed a little, "I-I mean... Yeah we've looked around- Of course it'd be nice to y'know, go do stuff and make friends outside of the hidden city.. But it's dangerous, even if.. I just mean like... Oh- Have you ever seen the Spider-Man movies? Peter Parker is the main character and he has these powers to stop bad things and bad people, so he starts wearing a mask and fighting crime. But because he's always off saving the day he never has time for a normal life, his family, his girlfriend, his school, his job.. He's always ditching without an excuse and messing up his normal life because he's trying to do the right thing and protect everyone.. We can't have both normal lives and ninja lives. We know that.." 

"Did this Peter Parker also have three brothers and a sister and one of their siblings partners able to support him?" 

"Well no.. He was always kind of alone, that's part of what made it so hard. He did have a friend helping him eventually and like being on the computer for him while he was out so the friend could hack stuff and find things for him. But besides that one person no one else knew"

"-Till the second Spider-Man Miles came into the story! Then they fought together for a while!" Mikey chimed in. Raph nodded. "Right. But even then Miles was always avoiding his family and making them worry and Peter didn't have much family left after his uncle was killed-" Mikey pouted a little, "I mean yeah I guess, but in the newest installment Miles finally comes clean to his family after this big battle with the other spider people who disagree with him and they all accept him and he gets the girl and his friends who understand him! It's not about pretending to be normal, it's about finding people who accept you for you! And there's no weirder place than New York, I mean April is a human raised by humans, and she's super chill and is even dating a mutant, there's no way she's the only one" Usagi nodded a little, "All things take time, but just as April understands you, others can too. This is merely a step towards that, you all deserve lives outside of this, and no matter what happens, or where you go, you'll always be family and you'll always be there for each other. You can worry about being Spider-Man when the time comes, but today it's just lunch. And I think a big tough guy like you can handle that without too much overthinking right? If anything, do it for Leo. He's been putting a lot of thought into asking you all to wear the pins more often. He wants to see you all being happy and doing the things you talked about wanting to do before all this happened.."

"I know you're right but.. Raph just has a bad feeling- I don't want to stop anyone or myself from doing stuff, and I don't want them to feel bad either. I just, I can't stop seeing it when I think about the pins." Usagi reached over gently patting his shoulder, "Well, lets face it together then. Okay? I've known you for what, three years now? There's nothing that you, or this family, can't do. What do you see?" Raph let out a small defeated sigh and rubbed the back of his neck, "Yeah.. I've heard that before.. But you're right. I can't over think things that haven't even happened yet." He paused for a moment giving another glance to his brothers before talking again, "When you brought Leo home. His arm had been torn apart, there was so much blood and.." He paused again, thinking back to Usagi stepping into the room with Leo in his arms, tear streaks staining Leos face that was masked with blood.. His arm broken to nothing and bleeding out the whole way into the medbay. There was bits of.. someone, stuck in his teeth and he couldn't stop throwing up till Donnie gave him a sedative.. Usagi gave him another sympathetic pat on his shoulder, Breaking Raph out of his thoughts, "It was hard." Usagi spoke quietly, "I understand, really. I know we don't always see eye to eye but Leo is... He's my everything. I have never cared for someone so deeply, he makes me want to be more than I am, and makes me feel so.. Seen. I wanna protect him with everything I have as long as he'll have me, probably as much as you do. And seeing him there in that hallway, bloody and weak.. And all scared and beaten up. It was jarring to see, and I can only imagine how you felt when I brought him back and you had to clean him up. And even now, two years later, it's hard not to get a little panicked when he insists he can go off alone somewhere. But the one thing I've learned about Leo is that he's so much more capable than anyone realizes, and sometimes even when you're unsure you just have to trust him, even when he doesn't have a plan, or doesn't know if he can win, even when he gets caught. You just have to trust him." 

"I do-" Raph said as he stood up, "And.. I don't hate you or nothin' y'know, I could never. You're a good guy, and I know Leo would've been in real trouble without you around to help him out with all the stuff he had goin' on. And we're real lucky he has you. " He paused a little and took his pin out, "Alright, I think we've had enough mushy stuff for the week, let's go have lunch" 

-_-_-_-

Leo, April and Casey walked into the room a moment later, seeing Usagi help fasten Mikey's pin on his hoodie. Casey gently pushed past the two to get a good look at how they all looked. "Oh wow, you guys look so.."

"Different?" Raph asked, tilting his head with a little smile. "I'm really not used to having hair-" Leo said as he put his pin on, "No no, I mean you look.. Like you. Its not bad, its just so weird to see you guys as human." Leo nodded a little, "Yeah I didn't think Donnie's hair would be in locs- It suits him though, less day to day maintenance and all." Donnie rolled his eyes and pointed back to Leo, "And you having those long bleached dead end dreads certainly fits your aesthetic dear brother." Leo rolled his eyes and decided just this once he'd let Donnie's comments slide, they didn't have time to wrestle right now. "You're just jealous I'm the hotter twin~" He said with a little laugh, "Are we all ready then?" 

Everyone nodded and followed Leo and Usagi outside, everyone looked a bit nervous, which was to be expected. No one wanted to get caught, or mess up on any first impressions on their first group outing topside since they all almost died. Usagi took Leo's hand with a little smile, "We aren't going far. Just up the block, figured a pizza place might suit you guys" 

"Pizza?!" Mikey repeated, pushing past April and Donnie to look at Usagi with stars in his eyes, "Ohmigosh you read my mind!!" Usagi chuckled a little as they walked, "Well you have said before how much you all love pizza, and I think a place with options might be good for Casey who doesn't have a lot of experience with the food of our time." Casey nodded a little, "Heheh.. Yeah, we didn't have very much there, and definitely not this kind of variety. I recently got to try something called ramen though- It was amazing!! Michelangelo was always a pretty good cook, even when we didn't have much he always found a way to make it enjoyable, or at the least, easy to get down." Raph tilted his head a little, wondering what kind of food they had in the future. He knew it was hard for stuff to grow, but was it really that bad? "No wonder you're so thin," Raph said with a little chuckle, Donnie raised his hand to pull the attention towards himself, "We should have a night where we all make our favorite foods and share them. I'm kind of interested now to try some of the food Casey was subject to- I mean, grew up with." April and Mikey both nodded, "Yes yes yes! I wanna try the pasta April's mom always makes for holidays! It sounds sooooo gooooood!!" Usagi slowed down for a second turning to Donnie, "Everyone's favorite..?" He asked in a quiet but serious tone. Leo stopped too, looking between the two. "Because, I wouldn't want to be invited to something like that only to make you all uncomfortable. Or well, most of you at least." Donnie hesitated for a moment but then nodded, "It's been about three years, I'm sure well be fine- And I mean, even if we don't eat it I know Leo and Casey will." Casey nodded, "I'm all for it" He said with a little shrug, "I don't know how well you're gonna like my cooking though-" 

"What's the main stuff you guys had to eat?" Mikey asked, ready with his phone to look up what sort of meals they could've made with whatever ingredients they had available. "Well.. When we had the mass greenhouse in the abandoned buildings we had a lot of vegetables, mostly tomato's, potatoes, and carrots I think. So we had a lot of soups, things that were easy to take with us in any container and could be had hot or cold. That kinda stuff. Oh but, we did have these crunchy like, candied flowers that Draxx always brought when he came to visit. But he never let just anyone eat them, it was special, he brought them when someone died, or when someone was born. But on a normal day we had cold soup left overs and Autolyse, which is kinda like bread?"

"I'm sorry, auto what?" April asked, more confused than ever. Donnie raised a finger, "It's flower and water, it's the most basic and bland version of bread, commonly made when people are lacking supplies. But as a side to other foods or when packed with things like protein it can be a pretty good survival food." Casey nodded, "I wouldn't call it my favorite food but if you really wanna know what food was like that's a pretty good start."

"So we're really gonna do Donnie's idea?" Leo asked, "Cause I mean, I'm all for it I just.." Raph gently patted Leo's back as a reassuring gesture, "I'm down, how bad could it be? Look Leo, I know you've been trying really hard lately to keep your side of things out of the house in trying not to freak us out and we've been really weird about all this but we're all grown ups here, I think it'd be good to do something fun like this. I mean Usagi's like family now, and I wanna get to know that side of him." Leo blushed a little as he looked back to Usagi, then smiled more and nodded, "Heh, since when did you get mature huh- Fair enough. Think tomorrow would be too soon? The new JJ movie is hitting the internet and Donnie said he could put it up on the projector for us to watch, might be a good activity to warrant having so much food."

"That's a great idea, I don't know how easily it'll be to get pops out of his chair though.."

"Eh, we can burn that bridge when we come to it."

"...Uh, Leo? Don't you mean.. Cross that bridge when we get to it?"

"Hm? Oh- No, no I did not."

"...I-"

"Oh look-" Usagi chimed in, pointing across the street to a fairly decent looking restaurant. "We're here." And now look, when I say decent, I really just mean decent by New York's standards, which in this case really just means there's no bugs in or on the food, there's still people inside who haven't choked or ran out screaming, and all of their lights work. You can't really ask for a better place in this of corner of the town when you're looking for cheap food and a table of 7.to just be ready when you walk in.  LRO Part 1 Part 5

[blobbyboiblob]

Hello again yes I am active so suddenly and stuff but I jus gotta let everyone hear my minds thoughts and let them make speculations of their own 😭

Also, fair warning canon 😨! And opinions and inlook 😭!

So my friend kept talking about this and I realized smth..

1. Some ship kids in Undertale fandom need justice(I think y’all know who I am talkin about cuz I mentioned them before-

These are mainly my own opinions as well as speculations from canon!!

Alr so: Lurik is cute to people but you have realized that Lotus only has some drawings and words said by Nekophy for their entire person.. so does Goth shshshsh-

And Rurik actually has more stuff on them as well as development and a personality. Lotus and Rurik were cute while it lasted.. kinda- but it ultimately was toxic and a really bad relationship for Rurik and Lotus’s mental health.

If I would have assumed Lotus to date anyone I’d say Ray(friends made the speculations and idea of the two and it’s so adorable!)

Rurik and Dante were infact adorable as they lasted, even if in some points it could be written as toxic or a very obsessive relationship Dante had character and actual funny things to him! And I am saying canonically I have heard some people say Dante and Due had no development yet they have so much more than Lotus and Goth.. Goths entire personality was, and from everything I read and know, to love Palette and keep it one sided while having a cringe romance that Palette never actually reciprocated.

For Lotus and Rurik it was for Lotus to just be a fell version of Goth that was the same but ultimately Lotus was exactly like Goth just harsh and in the end made Rurik feel untrusted and disliked, which was mutual, and caused him to go to Dante.

Remember: Fell versions aren’t perfect and never come from good lives. It takes time and canonically Lotus never genuinely grew while Rurik soared and grew up- even PHYSICALLY

Which I’ma poke at- canonically every art of Goth and Lotus show them small and that’s their forever height to physically look like kids.. imagine them all grown up and you see Rurik or Palette with the physically small Lotus and Goth 😭.

Not hating, headcanons and fanon exist but until I see Nekophy finally put a blessed hand onto Goth and Lotus their characters will never grow older than who they were no matter how much you wanna wish.

And no matter how much some of you wish Dante and Due are so much better than Goth and Lotus. I know some people ship Palette, Goth and Due which that’s super cool and inclusive! Who knows maybe Due can charm Goth into actually being open and no longer secretive and keeping Palette’s innocence? It could work!

Doubt for Lotus, Rurik and Dante though- I’d need to see a long history of growth with them as they are fell variants..

But yeah. I know that some people showed hate to Keko, the creator of Due and Dante and it’s just horrible and wrong! Even people showed a hate towards Ange with Palette and Rurik. They are allowed to develop and grow their characters and the creators have made mistakes it’s life you can grow from them and the creators DID grow and they are still growing. Their human. And yet I never saw people ever go to Nekophy and yes. Nekophy has made a lot of mistakes yet basically never grew or tried apologizing for them just changed their everything.. I am not hating. Honesty hurts and if you hurt and attack people who genuinely wanna change or because they created characters you like and never adapted to what you wanted than who really is the bad guy?

Do think hard because I love every creator and ship kid- well, kinda all creators- and I wanna see more growth and development for our beloved ship kids! Their creators hold the pencil, pen or stylus to make the characters good and I am happy to watch and learn about them! Their flaws, backstories and all!

It’s sad that Goth and Lotus don’t genuinely have a stable one or any reference sheet made. But it’s fine! I am just glad I don’t call headcanons or my ideas canon for them because sometimes you gotta accept what your given ☺️!