#you know the whole thing about the women being very strong but somehow so weak that they need boas title as shichibukai does not sit right

[hauntingblue]

I was gonna complain about the outfits at Amazon lily but the pirate that has just like an open jacket and a miniskirt on is such a slay...

[walks-the-ages]

let's play a game.

Biological Essentialism/Determinism can be summed up as, in the most simplified way, "what you are born as intrinsically determines your behavior and destiny".

"Gender Essentialism" uses the exact same framework but with a thin veneer of "trans inclusivity" slapped on top, to say that while your biology does not determine who you are, your gender identity does. Even before you realize you are trans or come out of the closet.

Under the framework of "Gender Essentialism" you're viewed as being X gender and somehow getting all of those 'benefits' from society even before you realize or come out as X gender.

So, some examples:

W is a member of a sentient Fantasy Race who is created to be Ontologically Evil. W being born into this Fantasy Race means that W is destined to be Evil and cruel no matter what and W and the rest of W's race will never ever be able to change their Evil ways.

X is assigned Female at birth. X is expected to be subservient, loyal to a single husband, and want to have children. X is expected to want these things from an early age and can and will be ostracized if X expressed any disinterest in these things or opposite behavior to the things expected of X's gender. (not wanting kids, not being interested in men, etc)

Y is assigned Male at birth. Y is expected to be fierce, strong, and to father many strong sons. Y is expected to want these things from an early age and can and will be ostracized if Y expresses any disinterest in these things or opposite behavior to the things expected of Y's gender. (being physically weak, not minding having daughters instead of sons, not being interested in women, etc)

Z is born into a strict caste system, and is born in the lowest caste. Z is expected to spend Z's whole life serving those 'better' than Z without recompense or complaint, with *no* possible avenue to advance in society due to the caste system.

This is inspired both by the wave of trans inclusive radical feminists who say that

"because trans men are of course men, that means they are inherently evil and oppressive and part of the patriarchy that seeks to tear trans women down."

and also because I've seen too many fantasy and scifi series way too comfortable with making Ontologically Evil Species and strictly enforced Caste Systems where everything is fine and dandy and everyone's happy with their lot in life as long as the ones with a caste system are the

"Beautiful, Pure and Good Elves, because as we all know, Happy Slaves aren't really Slaves, right? And if the Ruler has the Divine Right of Kings and all the little people think that's good, that makes it good, right?" (sarcasm).

If you've ever considering giving your fantasy or scifi race as 'caste' system that determins who does what based on their lineage or their body type and its apparently 'good and natural and everyone loves being their caste and wouldn't have it any other way'

....have you considered that Caste Systems have always been used as tools of oppression and discrimination and this is something real people face, and that we should not be writing "good caste systems" from the comfort of Western Society and perhaps consider the harm in romanticing these very real frameworks of systemic oppression?

Anyways, both in literature and real life:

do you agree that Biological Essentialism, Biological Determinism, and yes, "Trans-Inslusive Gender Essentialism" are ever correct and a good framework for viewing other people?

Or do you agree that this is an absolutely bullshit way to view individuals and that all it does is uphold systems of oppression, especially when it comes to queer people, people of color, disabled people, intersex people and more?

anyways just gonna leave you with this gif.

[ID: a gif from Pokemon the Movie 2000, showing Mew and Mewtwo floating over a battlefield, with Mewtwo having the realization "I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are." End ID]

[youremyheaven]

they dooo notice everything, I love it sometimes because they can surprise you with lowkey deep insights

okay my childhood friend who was a Bharani guy wrote this about me for primary school graduation lmao

'you have a face like the mona lisa and you make beautiful art' loll it was cheesy but so sweet for a 12 year old like awww- too bad that guy got too into drugs and recklessness. Plus he had major daddy issues-

wait that reminds me, I'd been meaning to mention.. I know we shouldn't take Freud too literally/seriously, but every Venus men I've met seems to have what looks like the 'opedius complex', like unconsciously they are always competing with their fathers and feel emasculated by him somehow, which is part of what drives their strong pursuit but also self-machoism when it comes to women

OMG UR A GENIUSSSS

I've noticed the daddy issues with literally every single Venusian man I know 🤣🤣🤣 and yk what's even more funny??? They all adore/borderline worship their moms 😭😭

In many instances their dads were kind of losers that their moms had to settle for and thus from early childhood they wanted to "be the man" of the household to make life easier for her and this developed into a need to do the same in relationships because they saw their own dad's as being very beta and not provider-y and try to overcompensate with their heightened masculinity. They're softies on the inside but they put on suchhhh a tough guy exterior because they despise such weakness and very much wants to be perceived as "a real man" 👀

The number of times a Venus man has told me something along the lines of "a real man would never let the..." or "real men don't depend on their women to run the house" or whatever is insane 💀💀💀 they saw their moms struggle and it left a deep impression on their psyche, so they spend their whole lives trying to make things easier for her and for "their" women. These men seem disgusted as hell by their fathers 🤡 it's 🤧🤧🤧

But yk as you said, trying to be the "man" who takes care of your mom and competing with your dad from childhood kinda puts you in a strange headspace when it comes to women 😣😣😣 because in this dynamic, he can never be her man. No matter how big of a loser the dad is, he's still the dad 😖😖

This means they endure a lot of humiliation and perceived betrayal throughout childhood bc their moms can't leave their incompetent husbands etc or no matter what the Venus boy does, he can't be the father 😔 as adults in love, they're already preconditioned to give love one way endlessly and get nothing in return.

The humiliation and rejection does not bother them because they've already spent their whole childhood enduring it at home 😔😔so they'll just obsess over you and project on to you even if you're not dating them or interested in them. They can be doormats this way 😔😔 it reminds me of Jane (I think that was her name?) from Forrest Gump who never reciprocates Forrest's love for her but uses him time and again. Forrest, like a Venusian man, loves her blindly and goes back to her again and again.

Forrest Gump is played by Tom Hanks who has Venus in Mrigashira atmakaraka (also in retrograde) and Sun in Punarvasu (his character is supperrrr Punarvasu coded) (Jupiter men are also endlessly giving in nature)

Blindness is actually a theme with Bharani & Purvaphalguni naks 👀

[deafknell]

You know what's a scenario I need? Priscilla introducing Anastasia as her girlfriend to Vincent and Arakiya. The sibling-in-law dynamics would be great.

Hear me out.

I think Vincent would be quick to accept Ana into the family. He can see Ana is a skilled woman, so he'd respect her. Maybe there'd be a bit of wariness from him, because that's how he is, but even so, he knows Priscilla is smart, and if his little sister chose Ana, then surely he can trust her. Ana could take a liking to him as well; she'd definitely have fun teasing him. Plus, Ana calling Vincent "our brother" when talking to Priscilla would be cute.

As for Arakiya, perhaps she'd initially be a bit jealous of Ana. I think Ana would make attempts to approach Arakiya nonetheless, and even though Arakiya isn't very talkative, Ana, thanks to her natural skill with words, could find a way to interact with Arakiya that doesn't make the latter uncomfortable. And, feeling validated by this and also impressed by Ana's finesse overall, Arakiya could warm up to her.

(Sending this to you because I've proclaimed you CEO of PriAna)

you have no idea how much I squealed reading this AAAAAA (ily <3 prisana my beloveds)

Pris is almost definitely the type to brag about having a partner, if not to goad others and observe their reaction. I can see her using her relationship with Ana to torment an emotionally repressed Vincent whos still trying to beat all the thoughts of Chisha. Like “you couldnt kill me and you couldnt even beat me at getting into a relationship. and youre the emperor? lol. Lmao even.”

And 10000% I think you hit the nail on the head with Vincent in that he’d be wary, probably coming up with a bunch of escape plans for Pris if she somehow gets on the wrong side of the Iron Fang (or if he knew about Ana’s connection to Halibel), but would eventually warm up as she’s got that easygoing, business mentality that he can respect. I think he’d find it just as entertaining as Pris does when Ana backtalks them and slyly insults them.

Ana calling Vincent “our brother”,,,, thats so precious omg. Pris mocking her habits of collecting people and being a conniving fox while Ana’s like “I’m a greedy gal, course I’d monopolise my future wife’s family too. I aint exactly got one of my own.” and one hit KOing Pris.

god speaking of foxes I gotta wonder just how funny it’d be to Ana that Pris’ mother is a fox demihuman. Like theyre both fox women in a certain sense, even if Pris dismisses her whenever its brought up.

Arakiya is a difficult one because (at least current canon anya) shes very, very obsessed with Pris. That whole line of her being willing to dismember Pris just to keep her on the throne haunts me. So I imagine if she found out about Ana, she’d be furious at first. Pris has picked someone weak who cant protect her (abandoned Arakiya when she couldnt do the same, one of her biggest regrets) and Pris has actively picked someone as far removed from Vollachia as they come.

But I do think with time and character development, Arakiya would soften up a lot. Ana can’t protect her directly in the way Arakiya wants, but she has dozens of people capable of doing so for her. She’s good at negotiating, and eventually I imagine Arakiya will have to contend with the fact Pris is strong enough on her own. It’d take a long time for Arakiya to acknowledge Ana as worthy for the Princess, but I like to imagine her and Cecilus going to Kararagi for (his) clothes shopping and Ana tagging along to get to know Anya better.

Oh, oh and I cant forget how juicy the whole “Ana is on borrowed time” thing would be as a reveal to her inlaws. Pre them getting along I can see it be a huge reason for Vincent and Arakiya to oppose the relationship on account of their protectiveness of Pris. But after theyve got positive opinions of Ana? It’d be devastating. Poor Vincent reliving what happened with Chisha, expecting the reveal to crush Pris, while Pris insists on her world working in her favour mindset. Arakiya remembering Prisca’s reaction years back would cause her to really, really panic. She’s just gotten the princess back—would her partners untimely death break her worldview once more, or is there anything Arakiya can do to finally make it up to her?

THIS IS SUPER LONG IM SO SORRY to non prisana people but. I have so many thoughts about these two,,,

[jokerfic]

Oh!!! Okay :D so there are a lot of aspects of No Man’s Land I like, but one thing I haaaated was how Tabby got nerfed — actually basically all the women got nerfed, which makes sense cuz it was such a short season that there had to have been Shenanigans. Which sucks. But so like. When we’re first introduced to the Galavans, they seem to have fighting skills beyond normal people? Jim has a military background and during the cage match episode he fought off a bunch of people trying to kill him,

psst I'm putting the rest of this ask's content beneath a readmore because of spoilers ;)

And he held his own against VICTOR after Mario died, but then when Theo captured him he was like “ah, let him loose, this’ll be fun” and then just. Wiped the floor with Jim without breaking a sweat. Just for shits and giggles. Meanwhile Alfred ALSO had military experience and fought this criminal dude WHILE giving Bruce tips on how to fight!! But then Tabby beat him up and hunted him down and he had to hide in a dumpster. And like. Okay, idc if it’s implausible, I totally buy that the Galavans just have special training that makes them way above even military dudes in terms of badassery. But then!!! I know Tabby HAS to die because it’s either her or Ozzie and the narrative would never kill Ozzie, BUT all I ask is a single teeny tiny scrap of realism 😭 she faced Oswald in a 1v1 fight, no tricks, just straight fighting, and somehow… she *lost*???? *I* could’ve beaten Oswald in that scene!!! (In fact I’d love a chance to try) Meanwhile Oswald is actually vicious and fast and has exp fighting no matter how much I call him a pathetic wet cat soyboy, but he’s definitely no match for any of the heavy hitters. This includes Tabitha!! I can actually buy Tabby being weaker than before cuz of losing her hand; she definitely doesn’t show up as well against Victor or Ra’s as she did in S2, but she still should’ve had no problem with OSWALD!!! Like at the very least I can buy her trying to shoot him, the gun doesn’t work, she doesn’t realize Ozzie has a knife and then he stabs her in the gut and gets SUPER lucky and hits something vital. But the chest?? And from that angle? And WHILE SHE WAS HOLDING HIS WRIST??? There is 0% chance that blow was fatal. She would’ve kicked his ass. *I* would’ve kicked his ass ten years ago. Also, then he goes on to Barbara! And I get that Barbara was a rich socialite with no training who only later turned to crime. It’s unrealistic that she got so physically badass. But she did! We accept this!! She trains with Ra’s people and kills him. Cool. We’re expected to believe Oswald took HER down????? Ridiculous. Then they had Babs call Tabs her “best friend”. You mean your GIRLFRIEND?????? Don’t no-homo that; y’all were a V with Butch. Grudgingly accept the baby as an excuse for her not killing Peng ever, and Lee yelling at them for upsetting her patient was VERY good, but.. ugh, they both get wifed, and Bane kills all the lady assassins so they don’t show up in later media >.> I fully agree Jim deserves neither of them, they are too good Idk, it just gives me Emma/Harley vibes, you know?

okay so first of all you're super valid, all of this is super valid, ESPECIALLY and SPECIFICALLY the rage about Tabitha suddenly and against-character being too weak to hold Oswald fucking Cobblepot's knife away from a killing blow. Like her whole deal is being a trained fighter, she was always her brother's enforcer-- meanwhile Oswald is the guy who hires enforcers, muscle isn't his strong suit!! there is no acceptable way it would have gone down the way it canonically went down.

all that said, asking for even a scrap of realism from Gotham might be asking too much, I fear 😭😭 ESPECIALLY in season 5. the writing was never the most consistent-- I get the feeling they changed their minds and changed direction several times over the course of the show, leading to baffling character choices and random plot threads that never went anywhere (Jerome clone that never showed up again, anyone??)-- but season 5 was a car crash. I say that with love. I'm happy it was so bad because that means I can dismantle it and keep what I like (territory city-states under different rogues) and toss out what I don't (Barbara pregnancy) without feeling a tiny bit bad about it.

And of all the baffling character choices, the no-homofication of Barbara and Tabs is the most baffling?? like who was that for? I really don't think anyone who'd be mad about those two being girlfriends is watching Gotham to begin with. I mean I guess Barbara's bisexuality is convenient until they need her to get back with Jim and then it's ERASE TIME. (the whole Tabitha/Butch thing too always seemed a little wedged-in to try and hand-wave her relationship with Barbara? like don't get me wrong, I like Butch, but I never bought him with Tabitha. for that matter I never really bought Tabitha as anything but a strict lesbian but I guess that's just meeeeee)

but yes as far as Lee/Barbara goes, they deserved to run away together and leave Jim Gordon in the dust xoxo WITHOUT a pregnancy in the picture. but honestly in my vision, Tabitha never dies (because that was stupid), Barbara and Tabitha are still together, and Lee is navigating clumsy invites from Jerome and Isabel to be their third (that's a joke)(mostly) so they've both got their hands full in No Man's Land 😭

[blondrichclosetwitch]

The truth will set you free, but first, it'll piss you off

But you know what they say, you can't help who you fall for

I bet you think about me when you say "Oh my god, she's insane, she wrote a book about me"

You'll never wait so long

Venus

Maybe the riddle of this accident goes back to your gossip with a ferocious strategy you play wounded in his cockpit

but I think that you forgot my days of teenage hustling

It's going to save me, save me, save me, save me, save me, save me from your dirty dealings

My time coming, voices saying they tell me where to go

California, a prophet on the burning shore

Standin' on the beach, the sea will part before me

I know where to go

Those women got them evil loving ways make a man go crazy don’t know what they’ve done

A man can do anything they wanted to

one thing that I asked my baby: bring yourself up

All I wanna do is jump in your saddle and ride. You’re my sweet little mare, I’ll ride you everywhere. Let me ride.

Little girl, 17

I could fly that night. Shotgun. And a sheriff behind. Keep on running.

I know when there’s some cookies baking, I can smell ‘em a mile away

Mama, turn your oven around.

You want some entertainment?

Go on, shove it up me - if you must.

Jarvis' comments: “I've always been fascinated by plants growing in places where they shouldn't really be - like weeds growing in cracks in the paving stones. For some reason I thought: "That's a bit like humans in a city - you're a natural thing but you're growing in this slightly hostile, crappy environment but somehow managing to survive." I started thinking about how most good music comes from people who are in shitty circumstances and then the Svengali comes along and makes all the money and the artist gets fucked off. Then there was the drugs connotation. There's a slumming-it mentality in our society which is going back to a Common People theme - people getting a buzz from scoring drugs off a council estate: "It's so authentic, I was in a real council house, and these people had tattoos and everything." It's like they've got real contempt for these people and they'll spit on them, but when they want some drugs or they wanna shag a prostitute they're OK. And then there was the whole thing about weeds being considered to be weak things. You get called a weed in England in a school if you're supposed to be a weak person, and yet weeds, as far as i can see, are the most tenacious plants 'cos they grow in very hostile [places] - they'll grow in a little tiny bit of soil. I always like it when you're going down a street and you see a roof and there's this big bush growing off the top of it...”

I know I keep you amused, but I feel I'm being used

Oh, Maggie, I couldn't have tried any more

Five to one; one to five

No one here gets out alive

Why do you come so far?

" Trying to get to you”

Used to be that my head was haunted

I feel strong, I feel lucky

Said I'm going to get to you

I've gone and quit my worshipping of the false gods and golden sins

Cause we've made love in the Tower of Babel and it fell down

It'll take a lifetime to clear your name

Betcha if you had ur way you’d turn back the hourglass

Somebody call 911 and leave his name

Oh, still running game, y’all

I dare you to stay with me

One way to find out if it ever gets better than right now

Maggie. Do you want to hear a story? It goes like this:

Every morning, I do a Latin clearing prayer on my shoes and the kids “spirit tools”, so I won’t fall and they’ll be clear. And there’s a thing I say three times.

The first time I see Bubbles. The second, the Tarot Reader. And the third, you. And every time I envision you, I hear either “I’m sorry” or the word “sad”. And you def look sad in my mind. End of story. Could be worse; when I see the TR, I hear the word “evil”.

And then Chloe in the Afternoon is your three of swords song today. The day I died for a sec.

Girl, I feel ya.

You analyze me, tend to despise me, you laugh when I stumble and fall

There may come a day when I'll dance on your grave

“And I yearn for the truth that you know of the years, years ago.”

Put a little music in my day

She's a real good friend right to the end

(Ain't no woman like the one I love, people)

I don't know why it is but I have to laugh when she reveals me

Tough on the teeth, but what the hell?

How long before the judgement day? Before we cut the fat ones down to size?*

“Did you hear what I just heard?”

You know this space is getting hot

I've been on the other side; then you call me, call me in

You think I am your possession

So maybe I let your big wheel turn my fantasy…I've been drinking down your pain.

White Ferrari. I know the car was white and sporty, I’m a glutton for detail.

(Sweet 16, how was I supposed to know anything?)

“Mind over matter is magic; I do magic.”

Que sera, sera

But I never got over the secrets I kept

The woman that you once dated: Who were you then, and who is she now?

I've heard lies that could curdle your heartstrings

(Drunk girls)

Rih

It’s such a long journey, children

You guys know I’m going to leave this blog, right

And then what will you do

[mypoisonedvine]

𝗹𝗶𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 || (very dark) 70s!Bucky x reader

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: he tried to be sympathetic to your cause, he really did, but he couldn’t just let you get away with disrespecting him like that.  

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 2.4k

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: smut (noncon, plus breeding kink and tons of degradation, like very heavy degradation, and multiple orgasms/overstimulation), misogyny, a bit of dumbification, housewife kink, ‘sir’ kink (brief), choking, implied anal, spitting (not on the reader, unfortunately lmao), quite a bit more than period-typical sexism, awful awful awful this fic is absolutely awful

                            Brooklyn, 1970.

Bucky’s mornings were sacred.  He had his rituals: showering, cooking breakfast, reading the paper and having his first drink and cigarette of the day, all before he left for work.

But throughout this entire week, his mornings had been ruined by the stupid fucking protest in the park just outside his window.  And to think he’d actually paid more for an apartment with a view of the park— he hadn’t realized then that the “view” was gonna be a bunch of hippies creating awful music and an unbearable smell that left his whole apartment reeking of reefer if he dared to open his window.

Attempting to ignore it for a week only made him more resentful with each passing day.  Each time he figured the crowd would surely leave soon or at least be quiet for the night, they seemed to somehow get louder just to spite him.

He probably should've waited until he was a bit less agitated to go down and try to bargain with you, but he stormed down there instead and tapped you on the shoulder when his presence alone wasn't enough to distract you from your incessant chanting.

“Would you consider being quiet?" he asked firmly.  "I have to work in the morning and—”

“We won’t be quiet until women have equal treatment under the eyes of society and the law,” you interrupted to explain condescendingly, shocking him with your icy tone.  He could hardly believe your attitude, in fact he couldn’t remember any woman speaking to him that way in his life: so far, he wasn’t enjoying it.

“I just thought you could be a little more respectful,” Bucky shot back, even more stern.  “You’re not making anyone wanna support your movement by acting entitled and inconveniencing everyone.”

“I’m sorry the revolution is inconvenient for you,” you replied, but it didn’t sound much like an apology. 

He wanted to say more but you blew him off and disappeared into the crowd, leaving him confused and irritated and livid.  Up until now he had been quietly skeptical about all this talk of liberation but now he saw it for the poison it really was.  A girl like you— who could've been a real looker with some willingness to try and a better attitude— talking to a man like him with so much hate and over what, a polite request?

This could not be tolerated; he couldn't let you get away with acting like that.  And lucky for you, he was exactly the guy you needed to teach you your lesson.

The good thing about hippies high on shrooms is they aren’t the most observant.  When he returned to the demonstration area the next night, he was able to grab you roughly and pull you back from the crowd with almost no trouble at all, dragging you into an empty alley and clamping his hand down over your mouth as your eyes went wide and your throat vibrated with silent screams.

“Shh, shh,” he soothed against your ear, “whatcha fightin’ for?”

He liked the way it felt to have you squirming against his grasp, using all your strength and not even getting close to escaping.  

“How does it feel to know I can do anything I want to you?” he growled against your ear.  “C’mon, sweetheart, can’t you put up a better fight than that?  I thought you believed in equality… you should be able to get away if you’re as strong as I am.”

He felt your warm tears trailing down around his fingers which held your face tightly, the struggle of your limbs slowing and weakening slightly.  His cock was already getting hard as he imagined the moment you would finally give in.

“You remember me, don’t you?  You didn’t need to be so rude, darlin’.  You could’ve just been nice and none of this would be happening.”

Your elbow shot back into his ribs and he exhaled sharply but didn't let go, grabbing your wrists and holding your arms to your chest as he pinned you to the wall.

"Oh, that's not gonna work, babydoll.  I'm so much stronger and bigger than you, all you're gonna do is make me angrier.  Is that what you want, sweetheart?  To make me angry?" he asked mockingly, leaning in to lick the shell of your ear as you tried to turn away.  “Pretty girl like you would make a great wife, why would you want anything else?”

Ignoring your struggle, he reached into your shirt and purred as he groped your chest, your nipples hardening when he pinched them.  “Maybe I can get behind this bra-burning thing if it means having easier access to your tits all the time,” he grinned.  “How am I supposed to keep my hands to myself when I can see them through your shirt?  Shouldn’t be showing ‘em off if you don’t want any attention.”

As fun as it was to play with your tits, he had bigger plans, so he reached lower to start tugging down your jeans, your legs uselessly kicking as he exposed your ass and thighs.

His cock was already rock hard as he hastily opened his fly and pulled it out with one hand, leaning back to spit on it quickly.  He spread the fluid with a few strokes over his length, figuring it would be enough to get inside you even if he didn’t really care if he hurt you.  

Your eyes went wide and your head bucked wildly as he poked the head of it against your opening, your body fighting a little harder once again.  The irony of that, though, was that you were already plenty wet in spite of what he had expected; it was so much funnier to watch you struggle now that he knew you were not-so-secretly enjoying it.

“Don’t be so dramatic," he chuckled darkly, "I bet you can take a cock real easy since you believe in all this ‘free love’ bullshit.”

He groaned as he pushed into you, impressed by how tight you were— so tight that it made his cock throb right away, your walls pulsing and rippling around him as he filled you to the brim.

“Oh fuck, there you go…” he hissed, smiling as you sobbed harder and struggled a bit more before finally relaxing into his tight embrace.  "You're gonna take it all, baby, every fuckin' inch of me."

A hard sob choked out of you every time he slammed himself to the end of you; he could feel the hatred radiating from you, the way you would kill him in a moment if only you weren't so weak.  But he could feel your reluctant acceptance, too, and the way it was slowly turning into euphoria— you were finally starting to like how it felt to be helpless to him, it was obvious with the way your pussy gave him such a warm and willing welcome while your pretty tits got even harder.

You clearly wanted to hate him, but your body knew better.

"You think I'm a sexist pig, I'm sure," he chuckled, "but I'm really not— I love women!  And you know what I love most?  Huh?"

He felt you nervously shake your head behind his hand and he laughed.

"I love the way you get so dumb when you get a cock in you.  All those useless little thoughts leaving your head when you're finally getting fucked right."

Your cries got louder even though they were still muffled by his hand, your sweet little pussy giving him a squeeze of encouragement.

"It's okay to like it, babydoll, it's what you were meant for.  Made to be my brainless fucktoy… born to serve me," he growled.  “You really should learn to appreciate," he grunted between brutal thrusts, "that your only purpose is to keep my dinner hot and my cock warm.”

Your eyes rolled back in your head and he felt your walls bear down on him tightly, wetness seeping down around him.

"Oh fuck, are you coming?  Shit," he moaned.  "Looks like you really needed to be put in your place, just needed to be used... god, you made a fuckin' mess, too, you soaked my cock…"

Your little hands tightened into fists, pushing against where his arm held them back, but he stayed steady as he pumped into you, letting himself get a bit lost in the feeling of you while he buried his face in the crook of your neck.

It felt so damn good to have a cunt coming around him, but it was even better knowing that you were fighting it and still couldn’t stop it, completely helpless to how good he was making you feel.

You almost screamed under his hand when he reached down to quickly rub your clit, your back arching to try to run away from his touch; poor thing, you were so sensitive it probably hurt you, but he was having too much fun watching you realize you were going to come again.

"Yeah, gimme another one, slut," he grinned, your legs quivering as waves of slick coated him and started to even drip down your legs.  "Can't stop coming like the dirty whore you are, huh?  Bet nobody's made you come like this before— cause nobody's given it to you right.  Nobody's shown ya what it's supposed to be like when a man takes you and makes you his."

From the way you moaned softly, teary eyes fluttering shut, he knew you liked the sound of that.

"Yeah, wanna be mine, baby?  Wanna be my little slut?  Or do you want me to pump this pussy full and leave you here on the ground for any other man that comes by to use you if he needs?"

You groaned softly, a weak little noise, and he felt his cock flex; as much as he wanted this to last as long as possible, he couldn’t hold back anymore.

“M’close, honey,” he breathed.  “I’m gonna come.”

He laughed breathlessly when you shut your eyes, like you were trying to go somewhere else in your mind, trying to pretend this wasn’t real.  But it was real, and he wasn’t going to let you forget that.  He was elated to make your nightmares come true.

"I sure wouldn't mind pulling out and covering that pretty face you've got,” he hissed.  “It'd be funny to see you go back to your little march and show them how owned you are.  But not today, babydoll, I think there's only one way you're gonna learn your lesson."

Another muffled gurgle from you, and this time it didn’t even sound like protest.  Maybe you were just too tired for that at this point, but it gave him hope that you could finally behave.

"I'm gonna take my hand away from your mouth and you're gonna beg me to come inside you, is that clear?" he grunted, feeling you nod vigorously.  "You're not gonna scream are you?"

You shook your head, and he slowly pulled his hand from your mouth as you gasped for air.  "Please— come in me," you panted.

"Address me as 'sir'," he instructed.

"Please, sir, I— I want you to come," you whined.

He chuckled right against your ear, feeling you shiver in his grasp.  "Honey, I don't give a fuck what you want."

To think you ever resisted your natural desire for submission was absurd now, considering the way that statement made you openly moan, your walls fluttering around him.

“Gonna fill you so fuckin’ deep you’ll never get it outta you, sweetheart.”

One more orgasm washed over you, making him laugh darkly while he watched you bite your lip to attempt to stay quiet; but that was impossible once he fucked you harder just to spite you, having to hold you tight to make sure he got as deep in you as possible.  Your whole body shook as he slammed into you, and he laughed at how dumb and helpless you looked.

"Bet you're on those new birth control pills," he grimaced.  They really weren’t that new, but he still hadn’t gotten used to them.  "Makes me sick to think you're letting a perfectly good womb go to waste.  Betcha want me to breed you nice and deep, yeah?  Wanna get knocked up?  You don't even care that I'm a stranger, you wanna get your pussy filled by any random man's come so you can have any random man's baby, ain't that right?"

At first he had worried that you would scream or cry for help, but now his concern was more that your moans would be too loud and somebody would catch the two of you in this alley.  Even if it was obvious now that you wanted it, public indecency was still a crime.

Good thing he had a new way to shut you up: his hand tight around your throat, silencing your sobs to blessed silence.  It was so hot to have you entirely at his mercy like that, to feel your pulse beneath his fingers, that he couldn’t stop himself from speeding up his thrusts suddenly.

"Fuck, I’m gonna come,” he gasped, “fuck, y-you… little whore…”

He had a habit of running his mouth when he was right on the edge, and the way your pussy was milking him for all he was worth made him spit out whatever filth he could think of.  

“Stupid fuckin' bitch," he mumbled under his breath as he fucked you as fast and rough as he could, chasing his high with no regard for your pleasure or your pain.  "Dumb whore, fuck, you stupid— ah, shit— stupid fucking cunt!"

He cried out as he filled you, groaning loudly with every pump of his seed into your waiting body.  Only when he was sure every drop was inside you did he release his grip on your neck, a loud gasp coming first before a few coughs and chokes that only made his cock harder despite having just filled you.

You started to struggle again, and he couldn’t believe it— after everything, did you still not know your place?

There wasn’t much time to relax and enjoy the afterglow when you were already trying to get away, and so he had to hold you tight again while he smiled exhaustedly.

“N-no,” you stammered, and he covered your mouth again as he pulled your head back to rest on his shoulder.  Clearly he hadn’t done enough yet to fuck that word out of you.

“Where ya goin’, sweetheart?” he panted against your ear, still catching his breath, his chest covered in a thin layer of sweat where it was exposed by his shirt.  “You’ve still got another hole to fill.”

[justatalkingface]

i really like how you analyze things you know how hard it is to find people who can criticize things properly? Very lol but I guess I'm guilty of that myself but I really like the analysis you've given about MHA. I kind of have a question even though it might be a lame one? But what's your take on the female characters of MHA? I'm personally disappointed by them because... I don't know they have potential yet haven't shown any sort of real depth that makes me really root for them. Does that make sense?

It makes perfect sense, actually. In the simplest, most brutal way possible, there's nothing actually there to root for, though I hasten to mention that's not actually their fault; they have potential, like you said, plenty of it. Hori's female characters have just, broadly, been abandoned on the side of road, like he has so many others (Class B, literally the entire school of Shiketsu, who has a nigh Todoroki level character, to name a few), but it's just that much worse because it's all of them.

Seriously, off the top of my head, the last time a female who isn't Toga or Mirko did anything really relevant was... when Uraraka talked down the crowd? If I'm being honest, (and minor manga spoilers here, if you're not up to date) Hori's about to have all the female characters involved in a fight in the manga, so maybe something will happen there, but to be even more honest, there's something about that whole scenario when the main members of the fights are all female that screams 'catfight' in the worst kind of way. I know they just joined a bunch of others, but how much do you bet that it'll end up being Toga, Uraraka, and maybe Tsu again somehow?

Also, I'm going to note Toga and Miruko for later in that they have special issues, but I'm on a roll here.

The potential is there. The way that the ones in 1A alone could be more relevant are broad; Mina's acid could be used in ways like water attacks are in Naruto, for example. Give me an acid dragon, Hori, that sounds awesome. Kyoka's sounds are strong enough to shatter the ground, with some support tech, yet she can't get something to focus them, make them hit harder? You know, how Bakugou somehow does with his explosions, and, like, his fingers, somehow, yet you have all this support gear right there. Concentrate all that noise down to foot of area and it'd hit like a truck. Momo is literally the poster child for wasted potential here, along with how Hori just left all the women behind: she's a recommended student, which comes with this built in hype of 'this one, this one is going to be good'. And... she never is. Out of the all the stuff we've seen her make, has a gas grenade of some kind never came to her? One with sleeping gas maybe? Or how about a tranq gun? And don't tell me about Japan and their gun laws; Snipe exists. (On a personal note, do you know what I yearn to see? A little cartoon or comic or something of Momo going, "I'm going to beat you with the power of friendship. And this gun I found!" Can you imagine? She's so serious, so refined, then she says that, dead ass serious, while pulling out one out of her arm??? I laugh every time I think about it. I really do.) Momo is scary in a way lot of the characters aren't, and it's not for her raw power, but her flexibility, and how she can target weaknesses with it. Weaknesses like breathing. The thing is that she's just not allowed to use it. Seriously, they struggle so much to try and put Gigantomachia to sleep, yet a few arc later she pulls out this giant ass machine to drug up Izuku, and it's just so... overcomplicated, how many steps they're taking to make her less useful. The tools are there. The potential is right the fuck there. These two things I've mentioned alone are simpler than some of the things she's made before, and the narration has made it clear that she's more than smart enough to think of these basic ass solutions. She's just not allowed to be, well, that useful. And Asui, honestly, is an interesting case. On the face of it, Frog is kind of a weak Quirk, but Mirko exists. In all brutal honesty, Asui has the same kind of Quirk as Mirko, it's just the less sex appealing version. And if Mirko could be a top hero on Rabbit, why can't Asui with Frog?

And that's the other thing. Out of all the female cast, we have a small handful of relevant people, like Mirko and Toga, and all of them seem to embody some sort of sex appeal. Midnight, before she was killed off off screen, was a joke character that got more development in a spin off in her entire run, and was literally a walking bondage costume. Toga is the token female for the League, but the reason she has so much focus is that she's popular, and she's popular because she's, as I've heard someone put it, some kind of Yandere otome character. Uraraka is the Hinata to Izuku's Naruto, and so has some One True Waifu energy. Nana's built like a brick house. Mirko is literally a bunny girl. These things? These things that people find attractive, and judging by his sketches, I'd expect that Hori is one of those people. Moreover, almost all of them have their characters defined by this one attractive quality, if only because they aren't allowed to show literally anything else.

It gets worse when you realize how many things happen just for that, for the sex appeal: Toga needs to be naked for her Quirk. Actually, this is an oddly common 'flaw': Toru has no clothes for her hero costume. She is literally running around naked. Momo's descriptions all talk about how she exposes skin to use her Quirk better. Mirio exists. Mirio literally phases out his clothes, but because he's a man, and thus not attractive, his costume is made of his hairs, somehow, and so phases with him and he never accidently flashes anyone. Hmm, UA. I wonder who else could use something like that. This is so mysterious.

That's not even mention how Mirko keeps getting brutalized like a toy owned by a particularly careless child, and by the way it keeps happening, the way it focuses on her pain, it seems Hori is into that? The worst part of that, I think, is if he had just done that once, he probably could have gotten away with it, and no one would have noticed. But it keeps happening. Mirko has no limbs now, Hori what the fuck?

So, yeah, Anon. I'm disappointed in the female characters too. I'm disappointed that Hori never gave them a chance.

[thekatebridgerton]

I think the concept of Cinderella has been butchered through the years, I mean, we went from strong woman survives her abusive family to girlboss who needs anyone or else you are weak, it was a very extreme concept, besides the media has also extremely changed how female character are suposse to be, I don't say women who kick ass are bad because they are not but we went to far from one concept to other without allowing femelar characters TO BE ABLE TO DO BOTH!!

I think that the Cinderella trope has been so girlbossified because people don't want to take a look at where the fairytale comes from: the dream of a person within an abusive situation of getting helped out of it 'by magic' and finding their happy ending.

We want to ignore this crucial detail about Cinderella because it makes society uncomfortable but the truth is this: Cinderella NEEDDED HELP. A magic tree, a fairy godmother or simply the kind assistance of the local seamstress lending her a dress her size and enough money for a taxi to the ball.

People in abusive situations do need help dear reader. And any little type of kindness could be the catalyst that empowers them to come out of their drugery and into a better future. But we don't know that.

When I was a kid my favorite Cinderella character was the fairy godmother. Because to me, more than being the protagonist of the fairytale, the most interesting character was the one helping Cinderella go to the ball. Not every day does one get a chance to help someone in an abusive situation. Not every day we can, but when we have a little power to make the situation better. We do. That's the most a normal person can do. And hope for.

Note that in every version of the story, the fairy godmother / magical assistance tree, couldn't get Cinderella out of her stepmother's household or give her a better life instantly. But the magic could give a moment of happiness to the girl. A dress and hopefully she would have a night to remember. The magic provided A momentary opportunity for Cinderella. That she could take advantage of. It couldn't give more. But that was enough.

We may fool ourselves into thinking that women in abusive family situations don't need help and they can girlboss their way out of it. Like how modern media portrays it. But the original storyline always points to the fact that Cinderella didn't need much help and that she could do the rest as long as she got a head start with a dress and a carriage and someone telling the prince that her step sister shoes didn't look like they fit right. But that she did indeed have help.

This is where the whole modern Cinderella trope goes off to the rails insisting that people in abusive situations can handle things on their own and that if they can't it's somehow their fault. Without putting the blame on the abuser where it belongs. Ignoring that a little help went a long way for the original Cinderella.

Women can have help with their problems and still be badass and hyper competent. Those terms are not mutually exclusive and we should as a society stop acting like they are. Needing a little assistance on the road to success doesn't make people weak it makes them human.

Cinderella was still a girlboss when the fairy godmother showed up. Admitting that she needed one every once in a while doesn't take away from Cinderella's strength and kindness or her bravery

And that's the tea dear reader

[sukirichi]

earned it [05]

Gojo Satoru is a firm believer that if you work hard for it then you shall earn it. But on the other side, he’s not unfamiliar with his own sins. He also believes that there is punishment due for his sins as he’s earned it.

cw. domestic abuse, car accident, slight angst, sexism, suggestive scenes, unedited and my naoya simping is obvious with this one, 

notes. TEAM NAOYA LET’S GOOOO *sighs* finally got this out from my drafts. anyways, here’s an earned it update while i recover from migraines because my schedule was so hectic last week and i’m so tired, might be sleeping a lot these days hence the hiatus :( also ik i keep saying this but future chapters will finally be more...UH SPICY AND MORE DRAMATIC, I guess? this is mostly an angst fic btw so please don’t expect too much fluff of heartwarming romance. there WILL be romance,,,it just takes some time hehe, anways ENJOY...or not :)

series masterlist

Women were weak. Trained to be voiceless, compliant, and unable to fight – Naoya found them weak.

His own mother was the perfect epitome of that. For years, he’d watched her leave his father’s room with dried tears, wiping them away with the back of her sleeves. When she saw a little Naoya standing at the edge of the hallway, she’d immediately usher him back to his room, her tears replaced with a smile so convincing Naoya wouldn’t have believed she’d been crying if he hadn’t seen it for himself.

Naoya wasn’t stupid. How could he be when day and night, he’s surrounded by tutors, expected to take over his clan and lead them all to a brighter future?

How could he be stupid when he can’t sleep at night, for the screams and cries of his mother, the sound of palm hitting cheek resonating just from the other room, accompanied with the insults directed her way by his own father?

How could he be so stupid when he looked up to his mother – who he believed was the only source of light in the rather desolate walls of their manor – only to see that her beauty faded with each passing day, the brightness of her eyes now filled agony, with pain, with fear? She no longer smiled; not even for him. She no longer came around his room to read him bedtime stories no matter how much Naoya pleaded because he’d gotten tired of reciting scriptures and poetry. She no longer kissed him on the forehead as a morning greeting, opting to stay in the sidelines with her head bowed, acting as if she was a servant and not his mother.

Naoya wasn’t stupid. As the future leader of the Zen’in Clan, it was his duty to hear and see everything, to be wary of everyone around him and to observe. He knew his father abused her. He knew his father hated her, looked down on her, stepped on her at each moment he could. And as if that wasn’t enough, Naoya found out they weren’t married in the first place.

She had been nothing but a mere concubine whose role was to birth an heir. Now that Naoya had come to life, her purpose to live ceased to exist. And people who had no role in the Zen’in estate had no reason to stay any further.

“Mother,” Naoya cried out, tugging at his mother’s sleeve. “Mother, please don’t go, don’t leave me!”

She was crying again; he wished she’d stop doing that, that she’d stop being so weak. He wanted his mother to be strong and fight back, but she’s not even attempting to wipe her tears away this time, displaying her vulnerability and meek self to him. Had his father been there, she’d be scolded again, claiming that Naoya shouldn’t be exposed to behaviors of surrender and weakness.

His mother cupped his face, trying her best to keep the younger version of himself from dangling onto her robes; the expensive, silk material the last evidence she’d ever been a part of them.

“Naoya, baby, it’s okay. You need to grow up strong and be the clan leader, okay?”

“But why do you have to leave? Why do you never fight back?”

“I’m sorry, dear...” was all she said, finally kissing him on the forehead like she’d failed to do so for the past months. Somehow, it didn’t make him feel any better. Instead, Naoya’s cries grows louder with each minute, loud enough that he caught the attention of his manservants who paled at the Young Master’s wails that was sure to displease his father locked inside his study. His mother sent a glance their way that expressed messages he couldn’t yet understand due to his innocence. Strong arms wrapped around his smaller frame until they dragged Naoya away from his mother, the sight of a luggage behind her turning him weak in the knees.

“Remember, Mother always loves you.”

“No!” he fought against their hold. His servants did all they could to not harm the Young Master’s skin, but Naoya was too strong, too desperate that they were unable to hold him back.

Naoya kept running and running, uncaring of the fact his loose robes hindered him from going at full speed. He didn’t stop, even as his servants had trailed after him, desperate pleas for the Young Master to come back falling into deaf ears. His mother had arrived on a nearby bus from the open roads that led outside the Zen’in Estate’s outer gates, her hand frozen on the doors with her head slightly tilted to the side.

That slight moment of hesitance – to look behind or leave everything behind – was what made Naoya stop in his tracks. He breathed hard, sweaty palms on his knees as he silently prayed to the divine beings to bring his mother back, for her to look at him one last time.

But she didn’t.

And Naoya was frozen in his tracks, everything colliding into one crash and burn that he failed to make sense of everything. He stood there and watched his mother hop into the bus, her decision to leave him behind final and irrevocable. What had rung louder then? The way his heart shattered into pieces, or the loud honking of an incoming car that not even his skilled team of guards could protect him from?

Naoya figured it must’ve been the muffled cries of his mother behind the windows that rung the loudest even if he hadn’t heard it.

Until now, he carried the mark his mother left behind; a gnarly scar running inches from his kneecaps that throbs until now. It reminds him every day what could happen to someone once they’re weak, once they’re vulnerable, the horrifying consequence of not being strong enough to face in this world like a huge slap in his face. In a way, he felt grateful for the scar; at least it was proof he’d done his best to run after his mother, and this injury just taught him it was best to face things head on instead of running away.

This scar would always tell him that running away was never the option, and that was why Naoya felt so strong, so disappointed when he met you. Naoya saw much potential in you – the wrath firing in your eyes and the will to fight back is what pulled him in on the first place – and yet you were already trembling on the ground, your sweat dripping on the floor.

“Stand up!” he demanded, tapping his cane on the ground as he wobbled to his feet. “Do you really think being weak will make you survive in this world?”

“I’m trying!”

“You’re not trying hard enough,” he spat out, matching the intensity of your glare. Had you been any lesser of a woman, a servant, he’d have your eyes gouged out. But to him, you were a vessel of hope, an embodiment of strength he could help you hone that he let you off. Still, he felt extremely let down that he expected so much from you, and you’ve been pathetic so far.

Naoya shook his head as he left. “You’re going to die the moment you step out of here. And to think I actually had high hopes for you. As expected, you women are weak and pathetic. Each one of you is useless.”

He didn’t get very far when his injury throbbed again. Naoya fell to his knees and immediately bit down on his lip to conceal his groans, but it was too late. You’ve rushed to him in an instant, already pulling his slacks upwards to get a good look at his knee. Worry is painted all over your features still drenched in sweat and exhaustion, and he pried your hand away, a frown deep on his lips.

“Get away from me. I don’t need a woman’s help.”

“You’re so uptight, you know that?” you rebutted with a roll of your eyes. Naoya watched as you skipped to the nearest medical kit he always kept in his training grounds (which he rarely used) and popping out painkillers to hand to him. “Just shut up and let me take care of you. Unlike you, I don’t walk around calling people weak, and you having this injury never made you weak in my eyes, but you’re not impotent either,” scoffing at him, you pushed the bottle of water to a very annoyed looking Naoya. “At least let me take care of you every once in a while.”

His whole life, Naoya knew nothing but the familiar bitter cold. Being served tea, scaring his servants with his mere presence, the toxic view that everyone was below them drilled into his own head – that had been his life, and his feelings about it were neither hot nor cold.

To him, it was just the way he’s supposed to be.

But the warmth of your hands, the tenderness of your touch to his scars not because you found him weak but rather you cared for him…it tugged at his heartstrings. That had been at least five years ago and Naoya still remembered that moment very clearly.

He couldn’t understand whether he hated his inability to run away or not, because to be around you confused him to no end. One moment, he saw you as nothing but his one way ticket to fortune, but when he was alone with you, he was beginning to see you more as a woman rather than a pawn to his game. Soon, you became more than that, and nothing had terrified him even more that he let someone in his heart just like that.

Did he love you? No, most definitely not. A man like him didn’t know how to love. But with you – every time he saw you – Naoya is confident to admit that he could somehow understand what love meant.

It had been a hellish trip – one he’d never admit it out loud that he wished to never go on again. He was just happy to be home before he laughed, because home? He’d never thought he’d ever say that, yet there he was, beaming at the sight of you pushing your weight off the limousine.

You looked as stunning as usual, running up to him even with your heels before wrapping your arms around his neck. Usually, Naoya didn’t like public displays of affection since it could greatly deter his reputation, but everyone knew both of you weren’t each other’s weaknesses that he didn’t care whether his people could see their leader grinning as his wife welcomed with a kiss. Naoya balanced himself on his cane to encircle a hand to your waist, pulling you closer and burying his face in your hair.

“I missed you,” you mumbled with your head buried in his shoulder.

Naoya’s smile wasn’t any less affectionate. “I missed you more.” And he did – a whole lot. Even as you both made it inside the limousine, the tablet passed to him per the usual to update him on what happened on the few days of his absence, Naoya couldn’t keep his hands to himself. His cane balanced between his knee and the door, while his free hand intertwined with yours, mindlessly caressing the matching rings that symbolized more trust than love.

“How did it go?” he brought your knuckles up to his lips and kissed it, his attention still focused on today’s stock market. “Did you convince him to lend us the lab?”

“Yes, my love, everything is under control. I told you I had it.”

“Cunning little minx,” he smirked at the confidence and triumph dripping from your voice. Naoya shut his tablet off with a click, hauling you until you were resting on his lap. Giggles erupted beautifully from your lips as you pressed your forehead to his, both your smiles equally mischievous. “Did you sleep with him?”

“No. Satoru is still hopelessly in love with me, so it didn’t really take much to push him to the edge with a few tears and white lies,” you smiled at him, soon dropping from your face when Naoya’s eyes darkened with an unreadable – no, unfamiliar hint of worry behind them. “Naoya,” you caressed his leg, “I don’t care about him anymore, you’ve got nothing to worry about. I just want to survive and put everything behind,” you cupped his face and forced him to look you in the eye, making sure he heard every bit of sincerity in your voice. “You know I love you, right? I’ll follow you to the ends of the earth. Him coming back doesn’t change a thing.”

“I know that,” he said, although deep down, in the dark recesses of his heart, something agonizing stirred within.

You were a smart woman – too intelligent that he may have feared you had he been any lesser – who could easily read through him, but Naoya wanted to be a step ahead of you that he caught your lips to stop you from seeking beneath his soul already. He knew that if you looked a little too close, you’d see everything, and that would be the last thing he wanted.

Snaking his tongue past your lips, he greedily swallowed your moans. Naoya’s touch was possessive as he gripped your thigh, seconds away from ripping off the material of your dress. He only stopped once he saw his driver pale in awkwardness, and he chuckled to himself, squeezing your hips to stop you from grinding on his thigh.  

“You’re always so good for me,” he praised, “I might just reward you once we get home.”

Home. Prior to meeting you, home had been nothing but a word in his extensive vocabulary. Home had been nothing but something that carried a meaning but no significance in his living, but now that he’d met you, home felt familiar. Home smelled like rose-scented shampoos, it resonated of bubbly laughter and curious hands finding its way to its belt. Home…you’d just given him something to lose.

As per the plan, you managed to sneak past Satoru’s defenses. Naoya had once said that your secret weapon was not your tempting nature as a woman, but rather your intelligence that sometimes put his to shame. He’d shamelessly announced his plan to use you again with the goal of taking matters into your own hands, looping Satoru into the picture until you have him wrapped around your finger again.

It turned out to be easier than expected. Truthfully, you wanted to refuse. It wasn’t because you were worried you’d beat yourself in your own game and fall for Satoru again, but because it felt so uncomfortable to hold him like that, to kiss him like that.

Each second you spent with him just served as a painful reminder of how he’d mindlessly pushed you to the side from a failed plan of ‘protecting’ you.

However, you couldn’t complain nor deny Naoya’s wishes. He wanted to use your abilities to the fullest of its extent and bring out your potential. Besides, you trusted him wholeheartedly that you’d never question his motives, even if it included seducing Satoru with crocodile tears and a faux broken heart to get him to bend and move at your will. After all, your will was also Naoya’s, and that was what made the both of you so dangerous together.

Standing here now in Satoru’s laboraty, sending him phoney desperate glances as you clutched your husband’s hand, the game had just begun.

He was giving you both a tour of what you could use from his laboratory, and Naoya had kept silent the whole time. The whole drug manufacturing was more your expertise than his. He simply observed everything with watchful eyes, his gaze darting between Satoru’s longing ones and yours. It was a play pretend of push and pull, everyone in the room except for Satoru unaware that soon, you’d bare your fangs to rip his neck apart, and then you’d stand aside and let Naoya finish the business.

You would’ve laughed had Naoya not tightened his grip on your hand. Both you and Satoru paused as Naoya desperately shushed you up, his eyes wide and floating from one corner to another.

Suddenly, a loud explosion came out of nowhere. The blast crushed half of the building to bare rubble and concrete and you saw nothing but black, inhaled so much smoke that your lungs quivered. The ringing in your ears didn’t stop as you wobbled to unsteady legs, waving the smoke away and coughing whatever filled your system. Satoru was right beside you, his long limbs quicker than yours before he hauled you up, checking to see if you had injuries but you were too scared, too desolate to care for his worry.

For your husband laid under a pile of rubble, an arm and his head the only parts of his body saved from the explosion.

“Naoya!” You screamed and pushed Gojo away, taking your heels off before darting straight to where he was. Jumping from broken debris to one another, your feet scraped and burned with each contact, the ringing in your ears growing louder along with the pounding of your heartbeat.

“Naoya, baby, no!” you tried to pick up the heavy slab of concrete that had crushed his body, tears blurring your vision until Naoya’s blond hair swiveled with his dark clothes. “Don’t leave me, don’t leave me, don’t you fucking dare-”

“Gojo,” he choked out blood. You fell to your knees as you cupped his face and grasped his hand all the while, your entire body shaking. His name kept falling from your lips as you asked him to stand up but he pushed your hand away, not sparing you another glance as he glared at the shock still man behind you. “Take her someplace far – somewhere he won’t find the both of you. It’s T-Toji.”

“No, Naoya, please! I’m not leaving without you!” It was too late. Satoru had easily carried you and threw you over his shoulder, running away from the scene because that was what he was best at. You pounded at his back as the smoke enlarged and covered the entirety of the building that had fizzled with chemicals inside, your husband starting to disappear from view. “Satoru, let me go! We can’t just leave him there!”

“Listen to your husband! He knows what he’s doing!”

As the smoke cleared for a split second, your world stilled. Naoya’s face was smothered with dirt and stains, pain evident on his twisted features, and yet – he was smiling. “Go,” he mouthed, hands outstretched far enough for your matching rings to glint under the sparkling lights. “Live.”

You slumped into Satoru’s arms. It was too late.

You couldn’t comprehend the events that happened afterwards. Satoru had pushed you inside his car before taking off to who knows where. All you knew was that you’d left your husband behind, and you stared emptily at the streets that flashed by, unable to feel or understand anything. It wasn’t until Satoru dragged you out by the wrist and a plane whirring before you snapped you back to life, your feet turning heavy as you plant yourself on the ground.

Satoru looked back at you.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you shook your head, “I’m not leaving him behind, Satoru, he’s all I have. I need to save him – even if it means I die.”

“You’re not going to die,” he starts off slowly. Satoru moves to place his hands down on your shoulders as if to brace you, even going as far as to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, but you couldn’t really listen, not when the plane hummed to life and remnants of the explosion still clung to your skin.

“Listen, Naoya is a smart man, okay? You know that yourself. He’ll survive, you just need to trust that he’ll make it. Now we have to go before Toji catches up to us and we end up all dying here!” he shook you back to life when your sobs overpowered his speech that fell on deaf ears, and you cried harder, much less like a little girl who quivered in his arms. Satoru sighed, perhaps just as broken from seeing you this way. “He told you to live. Naoya isn’t asking you to die for him, he’s asking you to live and if you don’t get on the plane, we can’t fulfill his wish,” he convinced, but you only bit your lip, still looking back at the car. You could steal it – one punch to his nose and you could easily get away, get back to Naoya, until he said, “You love him right? So respect his wishes.”

You love him. You love Naoya. He would’ve wanted me to live. He asked me to live.

That was the only consolation you could give yourself as you allowed Satoru to take you inside. His right hand man, Geto or something, quietly closed the cabin doors behind you. He was making sure his boss was situated, who in turn was fretting over you. All it took was one last warning glare sent Satoru’s way before he backed off, raising his hands in surrender and falling back to his seat.

Sooner than you’d like, the plane had took off, leaving your heart right behind with each passing second. The higher you flew up in the air, the number you became.

“Where are we going?”

“I have a base in Italy. We should be safe there for a while. Gather resources, plan our next move, contact friends...we’ll be fine,” Satoru pinched the bridge of his nose. It was hard to believe things would be fine when he too seemed restless; whatever happened between him and Toji must’ve really left a scar; not that you cared. You huffed away from Satoru and stared outside the windows instead, your heart dropping the farther Japan was becoming. “Hey. You should get some rest. You’ve had a long day.”

“Whatever,” you snapped at him. You couldn’t stand his voice, not even if he’s saved you.

The only thing that mattered now was living up to Naoya’s wish, and as much as you hated it, Satoru was right. You had to hope he would survive.

The chances of him making it out were low, but knowing Naoya, low chances weren’t zero. As long as he had a little bit of something, he would keep pushing. You just had to place your trust in him.

Kissing your dusty ring, you wiped away your tears one last time, eyes shut tight as you chanted over and over, live, live, live for me! Live! Naoya couldn’t give up that easily. You both had a long way to go, still so many places to travel, thousand more enemies to conquer and defeat. He promised you the fun was just beginning and that you’d get your revenge soon, and Naoya never broke his promises. So you had to trust, had no other choice but to believe that soon he’d be right beside you. He may not be able to completely walk anymore, though none of that mattered. You just wanted to be with him again.

You didn’t realize you’d fallen asleep until Satoru’s hushed whispers woke you up. Sitting up straight, you saw him scowling to whoever he’s talking to on the phone. He looked grim, long, slender fingers caressing his forehead as he sighed. Whatever he heard, it couldn’t have been good, and curiosity got the best of you before you could help it.

“What is it?” Satoru stilled at the sound of your voice, having not expected you to be awake. He refused to meet your eyes as he shut his phone. It angered you further and you stalked his way, slapping a palm down the table before him. “I said, what is it?”

“It’s Naoya...” he said through clenched teeth, still refusing to look you in the eye. “He didn’t make it.”

notes. team naoya...let’s go...cry 😭 when I said I would write more gojo x reader scenes and that they’re still the pairing, I meant it, I just had to take a dark route anyways DO YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND WHY IT TOOK SO LONG FOR ME TO UPDATE THIS, I DIDN’T WANT TO DO THIS TO NAOYA BAE 😭 but on the bright side, italy arc is gonna be SHEESH

taglist open (lmk if you want to be added/removed): @sixeyesgojo @shingekiyofeels @q-the-rockaholic @whatthefuckisthatthing @rogueofbullshit @kat-su-ki @kellyyween @sebootyforlife @asshxcm @charlie-xo @aoi-turtle @ladywaifuuwrites @savantsoulfinder @my-reality-is-in-my-head @hannya-quinn @90s-belladonna @tinyfrogsinmybrain @kinekyuroo @evesmores @ambiguous-something @lilith412426 @kakashiharusohma @aizawap @yumeneji @dora-the-grownup @jotazinha @themrsgojo @d34r-s4t4n @marai-t @toji-bee @hai-cool @badsadbby @stesphy @peach-buns-unicorns @misslezah @riri-marley @gracefullyfallinglikeanime @iwaplant​ @mikiminaccch​ | bolder users cannot be tagged

[youryanderedaddy]

Love Fuel

Summary: You were Jason’s first love before you broke his heart and rejected him. It’s all your fault that he can’t move on.

Tw: female reader, obsessive behavior, incel behavior, nice guy behavior, self - hatred, threats of non-con, implied non - con, implied masturbation, bullying based on appearance (not reader), deregatory language, kidnapping, misogyny, generalizations, stalking

this is a hot mess but its 1 am and i am tired, ik that incels are bad irl (obviously), but this is fiction and I kinda wanted to explore the dynamic and shit. 

Everyone used to call him JJ or The-Big-Jay back in high school. Well, most of the time his classmates weren’t really calling out to him or even talking to him, the names were whispered behind his back, after he had just passed the hallway, or on bad days - right to his face. The jocks, these dumb motherfuckers, would beat him up, mock him for whatever stupid reasons they had chosen to use as an excuse to torment the smaller and weaker. The popular girls would giggle like brainless bimbos as Kyle or Brad or any other football player stole his glasses or continuously punched him in the guts until he threw up all over the floor. Even the nerds, the kids at the bottom of the school hierarchy, messed with Jason from time to time when they wanted to feel the oh - so desired rush of power they so rarely managed to experience. 

Looking back, Jason could see why his classmates hated him so much - he was everything that society deemed as wrong and unattractive. He was thin, pale, “scrawny” as the others called him, on the shorter side, and on top of that the teen was terribly shy and introverted, never having the guts to stand up to his bullies or even tell someone about the abuse. The male spent most of his free time at home, playing hours upon hours of video games, watching anime and reading books he was simply too young to understand or look critically at. As he grew older, the man began to view the world as it trully was - a dark, miserable place that ate up sore losers like him. Men were primitive and foolish, which somehow managed to soften their faults. Women, on the other hand, were  calculative and manipulative, greedy and sinful. His whole life they had done nothing but reject him when he needed love and support the most. Of course, there were many other reason why the brunette detested the weaker sex. In his eyes women were evil two - faced sluts, showing off their bodies yet acting innocent and hurt once someone finally decided to use them for the only thing they were actually good for.

But you Jason hated the most. You reminded him that no matter how much he hated the outside world, he would always hate himself the most. He had to admit you were pretty, painfully so, with a perfect little body to match your looks and a sweet sugary smile that almost deceived him years ago. As much as the man regretted his weakness, he had fallen right into your trap at the time.

You weren’t the most popular girl, but you had your fair share of friends, all nice and loyal like puppies. You weren’t the smartest either, but unlike the other stupid giggling sluts you always tried to do your best. You were beautiful just like them but you were actually kind to the pathetic bullied kid no one else bothered to acknowledge even existed outside of being a punching bag. You always asked him whether he was alright and often took him to the infirmary when he looked paler and sicker than usual. You talked to him as if he was a normal human being and despite the initial doubt, Jason appreciated it. 

It was the last day of your senior year when the teen finally gained the courage to confess. He was shaking the whole time and by the end of his little speech there were small tears in the corner of his eye. You were the first girl the male cared about, the first one to show him kindness, to offer him friendship without asking for something in return. You were the only one who could make him feel deserving of love, worthy of affection. And then you took it all away in a matter of seconds.

“I am sorry, bud.” You had said that day after giving him a  half - hearted hug and an apologetic smile, that started to seem more and more like a mocking grin the longer the teen started at you. “I already have a boyfriend, but I am really flattered. I am sure that you will find a lovely girl once you start college.” You had added quickly, cheerfully, rubbing the salt all over his wounds, honey dripping from your plump red lips. He had wanted to kiss them, bruise them, bite them until your stupid lying mouth was filled with blood. Obviously you didn’t have a boyfriend or he would have known by now, he stalked your social media religiously after all. Even if you had one, he probably treated you like shit. And how could you even suggest him finding another woman? As if he wanted any of the stupid money - grabbing sluts out there. As if some of them could replace you.

The boy was too furious to form a proper response besides “Fuck you, bitch”. His cheeks turned red and he didn’t realise that the bitter words had escaped his lips before he could stop them, then his legs took him far away from that shithole of a school. He didn’t manage to see your reaction before running away but it didn’t matter anymore. You were just like the others. 

***

That day Jason swore to show you just how small and insignificant you had made him feel. He wanted to see you crumble, cry and beg for forgiveness, desperate for his love but never good enough to get it. The man formed a plan to change himself and come back for you once he had erased each and every trace of his past. The brunette came to terms with his terrible social anxiety and decided that he needed to gain social abilities more than anything. That’s why, as much as he dreamt of working from home as a boring programmer with an even more boring, but flexible working schelude, the male chose to study something that involved a lot more human interactions. The next step was to hit the gym for the first time and get a monthly subscription. It wasn’t hard to see that females nowadays liked brain - dead athletes with defined jawline and cheekbones, toned chests and strong muscled bodies, so if he wanted to impress you, he had to look his best. It wasn’t easy at first - it felt like everyone in the fitness salon had their eyes on his weak frame, laughing and pointing their fingers at his imperfections, but things gradually got better as time went on. The trainings became easier to get through and from time to time they even helped the man forget about his loneliness and nihilism. 

Jason soon returned to his old habbit of spending hours looking through your accounts - Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, he knew all of your usernames, each post, every picture and text. He couldn’t believe how much of a desperate attention whore you had become over the years. The male remembered you in your long brown skirts, cozy sweatshirts and pure-white shirts, all the gray buttons closed to the very top, blushing, laughing, smiling like the adorable Goody-two-shoes you were. Now you were smirking seductively in every photo, overconfident and vibrant, flaunting your tits for every man to see and wearing tight little dresses that barelly covered your ass combined with heels so high and sharp they could be used as a weapon. You were such a stupid slut it was disgusting, and he couldn’t stop himself from jerking off every single time he saw your pretty little face on the screen. He wanted to cum down your throat so badly it was ridiculous, and even after knowing that you had probably already had hundreds of cocks shoved deep inside your pussy, the brunette still wished to see you split open on his, taking his lenght like a good little cocksleeve. 

***

The moment when he could see you again finally came. How many years had passed since graduation - five, ten, fifthteen? It hardly mattered. Jason was successful, at last. The male had his own business that was doing surprisingly well, there were some guys from the gym he could call friends and the best thing, he looked absolutely unrecognizable. There was nothing left of the tiny scrawny kid with quiet voice that everyone stepped over, he was now replaced by a strong capable man, determined to get what was rightfully his and his alone.

It wasn’t hard to find you since the brunette knew everything about you - where your job was, what time you finished, how long it took you to go home and what path you took. You lived alone and worked as a barista in a small local cafe even now that you had finished your studies in your dream faculty. Turns out the princess wasn’t so great and smart after all, having to resort to working a minimal - wage job day and night just to be able to pay her rent. Jason was absolutely delighted though, he loved your stupid dead - end job and your endless struggles to survive in the materialistic world honestly and fairly without selling yourself like a common whore. On one hand the male was happy that you had clung onto your last bit of innocence and on the other your pitiful lifestyle gave him the chance to snatch you away much easier. And that’s exactly what he did.

 ***

You woke up confused just like he had expected, bombarding him with questions, asking him who he was was, begging him to let you go, to at least explain what’s happening. You were so dumb, but God, you were still so pretty, if not prettier than before. You cried so beautifully when Jason told you you belonged to him now and you cried even more when he slammed his cold rough lips over yours in a deep wet kiss. You whimpered and whined while the male sucked on your lower lip and bit down, good, he wanted it to hurt. The stalker couldn’t wait to be inside you, he couldn’t hold back anymore. 

He climbed on top of you and pinned your wrists to the floor before tying them up with delicate red rope and tightening it. It wasn’t like the man was scared of you slipping away and hurting him, you were too weak and tiny to stand a chance against his years of power - lifting and muscle - training anyways, he just wanted you to be as uncomfortable and squirmish as possible. Your tormentor wished for you to be in worse pain than he had been during his youthful years, and he knew exactly what to do. Next thing you knew Jason had ripped your dress apart, leaving you vulnerable and exposed in just your plain old panties and bra. Cold shivers ran down your spine when the chilly air hit your naked flesh and you finally realized there wasn’t getting away from this. You had to stay there, limbs bound together, unable to move or fight back, the stranger’s hands caressing your neck before moving dangerously close to your clothed breasts. You felt so sick you were going to throw up for sure if your abductor didn’t step back so you decided to use your last resort.

“Jason, please stop!” You screamed out of the blue, forcing the brunette to freeze instantly at the use of his birth name. You had already called him a pervert and a psycho which didn’t seem to faze him, but the name clearly caught him off guard. This only seemed to prove your theory further - the man really was your former classmate, despite the only similarity between them being the dark distant look in his eyes. “I beg you, don’t hurt me!” You continued, hoping to at least buy yourself more time before the assault took place. 

He gulped loudly and stared at your quivering form. The impossible had happened, you had recognized him and now together with fear, there was also pity in your gaze, the one emotion your captor absolutely despised. You used to be the only one who pitied him, and even now that he was bigger, better and stronger than before, you still had the guts to pity him. It drove him insane but any attempt to hurt or touch you was fruitless now - your soft skin was suddenly burning his fingers like hellfire. 

“You must be thinking that I am a monster.” Jason started out dryly, chuckling bitterly, humorlessly even. He clenched his fists unconsciously and brought them to the floor in a fit of rage, missing your head by mere inches. Your heart was beating like crazy and you only hoped the mandman couldn’t hear it. “A freak.” The man spat out the word like it was a curse and for a split second his eyes softened before turning into two spinning torches. “Right?” You were sure that if looks could kill, his would have you dead by the end of the night so you quickly nodded your head no.

“You are lying to me again, pretty girl.” The brunette replied feisty, "pretty” rolling off his tongue like an insult. Then he broke into hoarse maniac laugher and lowered his head so his face leveled up with yours, so close you could feel his warm breath on your tear - stained cheek. “When I am done with you, you wouldn’t be so pretty anymore, darling.” Your captor growled and attacked your neck, sinking his teeth deep into the flesh. “You will see exaclty how ugly my love is.”

[softcallofdutyimagines]

Hello!! Can we have an couple of HCs of the safehouse bois (COD: Cold War) loving their curvy fem s/o? (and maybe trying to make her feel happy in her body if she's insecure of feels weird?)

Thankie and sorry for the oddly specific request 😅

Djsjsjsj ok ik you have like two other requests, and they'll be coming!!! But this struck such a mood I had to skip the line lol.

Honestly, like the way I tried to treat myself to some ✨ s p i c e y ✨ lingerie that just arrived and it fits literally everywhere else except that, ofc the cup size is an absolute JOKE, i-

Anyway, I digress lmao. Thank you for the request(s) btw, and enjoy!!!

---

Adler

Personally, he doesn't strike me as the kind of guy to have a particularly strong preference for any one "type"

But in the era where the super tall, super slim, super models reign supreme, he understands that sometimes it's hard to feel pretty if you're built like anything else

After all, I don't think any of the guys know how it feels to see yourself as "unattractive" more then he does

I mean, if he'd been cut a little deeper or on a different angle, he could've needed whole skin grafts, or even physical therapy for his jaw

And who wants a guy as messed up and broken down as that, right?

But you... Oh, you're gorgeous

Adler is very soft and gentle when it comes to his appreciation for you and your body

While he does know how to express himself, he's not really the grand gesture type, like some of the others are

He is the biggest self love hypocrite, always quick to get down on himself and his facial scars, but absolutely cannot STAND to see you upset over you body

You chide him for this now and then, but he usually jokes it away

I know I said Adler doesn't really have a type, but don't think for a second that he'd pass up on a great thing when he gets it

I don't want to say "handsy" but he definitely likes to just... Touch you, when you're alone together

Not even necissarily in a sexual way, he just likes to appreciate the shape of you, you know?

Very into hugs from behind, or really at any angle, as long as he gets to feel his arms around your waist

Also, you can catch him absent mindedly caressing your hips with his knuckles or a lone finger whenever he's standing around with you

Hudson

Oh y'all ain't ready for this one lmao

I am 99% certain that behind that steely facade, is a man who loves nothing more then a THICC juicy Queen™

I'm so serious, like the curvier the better for this dirty dog lmao

The best part is, that the fun isn't in that he just goes feral when you two are alone (although he certainly could, in a rare mood)

He's actually really shy about it, and he doesn't want you to feel like that's the only reason he loves you

And while you do appreciate the respect he has for you, you'd be lying if you said you didn't like to tease him

A favorite of yours is to walk into his home office half or fully naked and watch him, very obviously, struggle to stay focused on his paper work

He knows he's weak, but damn it he can never last long before giving in and handing over whatever kind of attention you're seeking

You know, whatever that may be 😏

When you're feeling insecure however, he can sense it immediately and always seeks to get to the bottom of whatever is causing you to feel that way

Although he's rather direct, he's tactful and tries his best to know the right thing to say

He's a great listener, and will never hesitate to tell you how beautiful and special you are to him

Lazar

Lmao, I don't think there is any universe in which Lazar would not be in full support of being with a curvy woman

Especially as a big guy himself, you two are an absolute power couple

He is both literally and metaphorically your biggest hype man when it comes to your appearance

Also, 10/10 likes to give you gifts of clothes and the like that he thinks you might appreciate/look pretty darn good in

Honestly, it is rare to feel down about your body when in a relationship with him, but everyone gets insecure sometimes, and he gets that

Thankfully, he's a master comforter, and is always at the ready to give you the treatment you need to feel better

Typically you can expect snacks and cuddles if you're just feeling sad, and stuff like a massage or body kisses and so forth if you need a reminder that you're literally the most gorgeous woman on earth

Oh, and he's very protective of you and defensive of your looks

I kind of hate to use this terminology lmao, but Lazar is the Alpha™ everywhere he goes, and he has no problem reminding other guys of it

So if he sees someome else checking you out, he'll be sure to block their view and do something like make direct eye contact until they leave you be

Have you ever had a 6'4, powerlifter looking, tank of a man sneer directly at you before?

Not a good feeling, I assure you

Needless to say, you don't have to put up with much, if any harassment or other stupidity on Lazar's watch

Mason

Alex strikes me as the type who doesn't buy into the paper thin beauty standard that society like to push

Obviously that's great if you're just naturally thin and all! But mostly he's totally down for the curvy, "built like a brick house" type of woman

He appreciates the way that you can keep up with him when he has to do physical things around or outside the house

Alaska is a rather unforgiving place after all, so he finds great comfort in the support and companionship you have to offer him

You're like his little amazonian goddess, and he's always in awe of not only how unbelievably beautiful you are, but also how hardy and tough you can be

In fact, you and your body are so normalized and loved by him in his mind that it genuinely catches him off guard when you say you're feeling insecure about it

But in times like that, he loves to tell you how beautiful your body is, not just for the way it looks but for the things it can do

You're built so strong and tough, but also soft and feminine... he can't even think about being with anyone else

He's very into body worship, like Lazar is, but Alex is a lot more gentle and is extremely conscious of making sure you're alright as he goes along kissing and caressing

If he could only show you how beautiful you are to him, he would in a heartbeat, but for now he just hopes his words and actions are enough

Sims

Oh, you already know Sims loves a thicc, curvy snack of a woman lmao

Skinny guys always love the curvy ladies

He doesn't really go feral when you two are alone, but he's not exactly shy about having this hands all over you either

For sure he always greets you with a compliment, whether it be a look, a whistle, or words... he's prepared

Also, he's very vocal in having you understand that there is not a single outfit you look "bad" or "unflattering" in, even if it's just sweats and a t-shirt

In fact, he is so confident in you, that he loves to show you off when he can and if you're comfortable

Always introduces you as "his girl" and is never afraid to point out your new outfit, hair-do, nails, ect

I feel that Lawrence would be another case where it's quite rare indeed to feel insecure about your body, and so when such times do arise he takes it seriously

He's basically a gentler, more emotional version of Hudson

By that I mean, he's the type to want to talk it out (if you're up to it) and ask what's wrong or if someone said something to you

You'll always have a reliable listener and food advice giver in him, and somehow that seems to always do the trick

Woods

Honestly, Woods is Hudson part 2, except that he has all the vocalized pride of loving curvy women as Sims and Lazar

He's still careful to make sure he doesn't come off as a creep or something, mind you, but complimenting and loving on your body just comes naturally to him

Extremely handsy in private, and you've definitely swatted his hands away from your hips, waist, back, ect more then once

In public, I wouldn't exactly say "handsy" but he's determined to make sure everyone knows you're with him

He usually escorts you places with a hand gently placed either just above your tailbone or protectively wrapped around your waist

As independent as you may be, you must admit, it's nice to feel like a princess everywhere you go, escorted around by your knight in shining flannel

He'll even offer you his arm if he's feeling particularly gentlemanly, because yes, miracles can happen

Unfortunately, Frank is probably the worst wordsmith of all the gang, and is next to clueless on what to say if you're feeling down and insecure

At least to his credit he'll usually start off by admitting to that fact before giving it a try

"Well, you know I'm shit with words, but... I hope you also know that I love you the way you are"

Thankfully what he lacks in words, he makes up for in physical affection

Even if you're really only comfortable with some cuddling, he's gonna cuddle you so good!!! He's determined and will stop at nothing

After all, whatever it takes to make you feel every bit as amazing as he knows you are

[therenlover]

Would The Danny Bunch Survive A Holiday With My Family?

A/n: In the wake of recent life garbage, I have neglected to write a whole fic, and I’m sorry. In the interim, please enjoy this writing exercise I have put together in the hopes of nailing some characters I haven’t written for in the past in time for a larger project I’m working on! Cheers!

Characters: Laszlo Kreizler, Alex Kerner, Niki Lauda, Andrea Marowski, Ernst Schmidt, and Helmut Zemo

Rating: T

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of Mild Misogyny, Mentions of Alcohol/Alcoholism, Mentions of Mental Illness, Non-Graphic Mentions of Death, Minor Spoilers for The Alienist Season One, Minor Spoilers for Goodbye, Lenin!, Spoilers for Rush (2013), Minor Spoilers for The Cloverfield Paradox maybe??? I haven’t actually seen the whole movie, blame Wikipedia if things are wrong. 

Laszlo Kreizler

NO

As the first of all of the Dannys to be put through the ringer, Laszlo Kreizler unfortunately would not survive a holiday with my family.

First of all, this man does not like massive huggy kissy crowds, so he’d already be off his game the second he walked into the packed house. That’s not why he’d die though, surprisingly.  

His downfall would be his status as an Alienist. 

There is simply so much mental illness and childhood trauma present at my family holidays that he would combust within 15 minutes of sitting in a room with all of my relatives.

Even if he were to somehow make it past the introductory phase, my family is nosey as hell, so they’d be grilling him about his arm and his own childhood trauma within the first hour. 

Laszlo, for all of his strength, simply wouldn’t be able to withstand it.

His death wouldn’t come from the initial combustion though. No, it’s not that simple. 

Knowing Laszlo, once he had combusted and entirely lost his composure the first time, he would become extremely intrigued about the interconnected nature of everyones issues with each other and he would start asking questions. 

That’s where the problems would begin. 

Because it’s one thing if my drunk great aunt starts badmouthing her sister at the table for abandoning her 90 year old mother for a lake house with her new boyfriend. That’s fine. 

But when Laszlo hops in and starts picking apart the mommy issues and underlying reasons for their decades long sibling rivalry? 

Oh it would be over for him. 

The yelling would never end. 

And, I have no doubt that Laszlo would start to psychoanalyze whoever started to yell at him, which would only lead to more yelling. 

In the end, someone would throw a probably full and probably fresh out of the oven casserole dish at his head and he’d be unable to defend himself because of his weak arm. 

We’d have to cart him out in a wheelchair and even if he were to technically survive, he’d never come back. 

Therefor, Laszlo Kreizler would fall victim to my family and die before we even got to dessert. 

Alex Kerner

YES

Ah, little baby Alex! A great contender here for holiday survival.

He seems relatively young in comparison to most of the Dannys on this list, though I don’t actually know how old he’s supposed to be. 

Based on his relative youth, he would automatically get points with the fam for not seeming like a creep or sugar daddy. Instead, he could be just about any dude I brought home from college. 

His skillset as a semi-skilled laborer would also earn him some points, seeing as several members of the family are in similar professions.

Alex might get lost in some of the more complex conversations about the local organic scene or the fine details of running a fine art gallery, but he would fit right in with the majority of the younger members of the family, smiling and nodding his way through the conversation. 

His enthusiasm and optimism would brighten the room and leave everyone excited to see him around again. 

There’s also the semi-small detail of him caring for his mother, which would earn sympathy from the older members of the family as they are in charge of caring for my deaf, blind great grandmother. 

Now, all of these aspects have already set Alex up for a successful survival of a holiday dinner with my family, but the real secret weapon he has up his sleeve is what really cements him in place as a survivor. 

What is his secret weapon, you may ask?

Lies.

Alex Kerner is really, really good at lying, and is even better at figuring out increasingly convoluted ways to keep his lies straight. 

If he managed to hide to fuckin’ Berlin Wall coming down from his mother for as long as he did, he could keep a couple of white lies up for appearances if he was asked any potentially embarrassing or weird questions that would make him look bad. 

He could also lie about enjoying my great aunt’s cooking, which is a vital skill for holiday survival in my family. 

Therefor, at the end of the day, Alex Kerner would not only survive a holiday with my family, but he’d probably enjoy it and get invited back for every subsequent holiday he could possibly attend. 

Niki Lauda

NO

Niki is another Danny that falls very firmly into the category of characters that would absolutely not survive a holiday with my family, for many, many reasons. 

First of all, just like Laszlo, Niki is not huge on going to big huggy kissy parties. 

Both adults and children would be all over him the second he walked in the door, which would probably make Niki get very uncomfortable and cagey. 

Little does he know at that point that people aren’t just all over you when you get in the door. 

No, no, no; from the moment you show up to the moment you leave, if you’re at a holiday with my family you are being basically accosted with questions and hugs and conversations that get weirdly personal. 

It doesn’t help that the whole entire house is packed and there are eyes on you at every moment, so he wouldn’t even be able to sneak in a break for air or a cigarette. 

If my own mother can’t sneak out for a smoke when she’s been going to these events her whole life, the new guy who’s still being vetted by the family sure as hell won’t be able to either.

Needless to say, Niki would start to get really, really tired of it all in an hour tops. I’ll give him until dinner at most. 

That’s where things would start getting really sticky.

See, a lovely little fact about the Niki Lauda that lives in my brain, as portrayed by Daniel Bruhl in Rush (2013), is that he’s just a little bit misogynistic. No more than would be period typical, but a little misogynistic.

Another fun little important thing to note is that my family is entirely matriarchal in nature. 

There are only 4 reoccurring male guests at family holidays out of about 20 to 25 guests at each event; My great aunt’s husband of many, many years, the two male siblings my mother has that live in the area, and the young son of one of those siblings. 

Men, specifically boyfriends, simply do not last in my family. They are considered pretty disposable and easily banned from family events after breakups or small mishaps. 

So, not only would Niki not have any other manly men there to chat about sports with over a scotch and a cigarette, he would be surrounded by so much estrogen that he would definitely struggle with his inner asshole even more than usual. 

In fact, we never have sports on, even on Thanksgiving. Poor Niki would be stuck hearing conversations about artisanal candlemakers and how to hand felt a woodland elf puppet.

Back to his downfall, the second he made a slightly sketchy joke about women in the kitchen at the dinner table to my great uncle, his fate would be sealed.

If you thought the yelling at Laszlo would have been bad, this yelling would be ten times worse, because he would be surrounded by like 20 very angry, very defensive, and very strong women waiting to beat the shit out of him and I would not be any help. 

He dug the hole, so he can climb out of it. 

In the end, his death would come when he tried to light a cigarette and calm himself down at the dinner table while trying to rescind his earlier statement, because smoking inside around all the precious textile art? Thats a big no no. 

My great aunt would grab the lighter right out of his hand, light up whatever cocktail she had at the moment, and throw it all directly into Niki’s face.

It would be like crashing his car all over again, only this time he would be surrounded by people who would rather he burn than try to get him out of the situation. 

Moral of the story, Niki would die within the first few hours of a holiday with my family because he made an asshole comment to a room full of women who don’t put up with that shit. Don’t be like Niki, even if you think you won’t get killed for it. 

Andrea Marowski

YES

Andrea is pretty much the polar opposite of Niki here, and I love him for it. 

He is very soft, very kind, very pure, and would never dare to say something rude at the dinner table like a certain racer we all know.

He couldn’t even say something rude if he tried to, because he probably wouldn’t have the English in his vocabulary to say the things he wanted to say even if he intended to say them out loud. 

But let’s be honest here, Andrea would never. 

Even with his limited English, Andrea would appreciate being surrounded by a whole bunch of people who think he’s the sweetest little thing since the invention of cake. 

My great grandmother, despite being almost entirely blind and deaf, would say he looked darling and he would immediately be a member of the family from the moment he stuttered out his thanks. 

Andrea, like Alex, is also relatively young, so he would get points for not being old enough to be my father. 

I feel like, because Andrea was shown living happily in a tiny village by the ocean with two old ladies, he would have an appreciation for craft, so he wouldn’t mind sitting quietly as my great aunt pawns off a handmade blanket from my great grandmother to him. 

He would also happily sit with the younger children and do whatever craft or simple game one of my aunts brought for them that time. 

The cherry on top with Andrea is his skill with the violin. 

My family is one that appreciates fine art a lot, but more than anything we appreciate music. 

I wouldn’t say that any of us are anywhere close to Andrea’s proficiency, but we definitely aren’t terrible, and we all can appreciate the effort, practice, and talent that goes into getting truly good on an instrument like Andrea is on his violin. 

He would be encouraged to play, of course, and he would happily oblige. 

If he felt comfortable enough, I could even see my great uncle grabbing his guitar, my cousin sitting at the piano, and my sister bringing out her own violin to do a little quartet with some simple song they knew as everybody else sang along. 

By the end of the holiday evening, once dinner was served and people were heading to the cars, Andrea would definitely be considered a member of the family. 

Needless to say, he’d survive and pass their tests with better than flying colors, even despite the language barrier. 

Ernst Schmidt

NO

Now, Ernst was probably the most difficult one on this entire list to put into the living or dying category. In the end, though, there were a few things that couldn’t be overlooked that send him into bad territory. 

To be fair, though, he would last the longest out of everyone who would die tragically at one of my family’s holiday gatherings. 

He, like the past two victims, would not be exactly suited for the mushy crowding that’s inevitable when it comes to my family. 

That being said, I think he would deal with it a little bit better than the other two did and would make polite conversation with the family when he could. 

The fact that he was trapped in a packed house filled with drunk people who have several generations worth of beef with each other, though, would start to get him eventually. 

If we consider all of the shit that happened while he was in space to be canonical minus, you know, the earth getting really fucked up, he would probably start to go a little bit nuts while packed together with that many passive aggressive people.

The second someone burst into tears on the way to the bathroom he would start to lose his shit. 

Still, I think Schmidt would probably be fine-ish until dessert was served, because that’s about the time where all the adults are absurdly drunk, so insanity ensues. 

They would start poking at him about his credentials and experiences as a physicist. 

He would answer their questions at first, but, unfortunately for him, the questions would turn more and more personal and uncomfortable as time went on. 

Did he ever still think about what happened up in space? Did he blame himself for not getting things to work correctly? How much did he miss his old world and old life? Did he ever have nightmares about what he saw? How much did it hurt to get shot?

They’d poke and poke and poke in their drunken state until poor Schmidt would snap at them, flying into a slight rage at their insistent probing. 

From there, he would be swiftly asked to leave and then “accidentally” run over while calling an Uber to take him to wherever he’s staying as my drunk great aunt tries to back out of the driveway to drive down the block to her house. 

In the end, Schmidt and his wit would be really close to surviving a holiday with my family , but he would, unfortunately, let his anger get the best of him, and it would be the last thing he ever did. Literally. 

Helmut Zemo

YES, BUT ONLY BARELY

Okay, so my earlier comment about Ernst being the most difficult out of everyone was incorrect. Zemo was, by far, the hardest to put into one category or the other. 

His wit and charm won out in the end, though, and I determined that he would survive one single holiday with my family. 

If he ever came back for a second he definitely wouldn’t make it, but he would succeed in living past the first one. 

Helmut’s problems start, surprisingly, not with the fact that he is a criminal. In fact that doesn’t even cause any problems for him. 

No, instead they start with the fact that he is 43.

I am 99% sure that my mother is 43, and I know for a definite fact that he’s older than one of my uncles who would be present. I, at the time of writing this, am 18. 

Needless to say, literally everyone would be massively suspicious of him and his intentions the second he walked through the door. The amount of money in his bank account definitely wouldn’t help in this situation either. 

The family would warm up to him eventually, though, because if there’s one thing Helmut is good at besides killing people, it’s making people like him even if they absolutely shouldn’t. 

With his expansive knowledge of what feels like literally everything rich and niche, he would slowly win over the older members of the family. Who knew the strange old man Jac brought home was so well versed in the American pottery scene, or that he could name specific jewelry artists from across the world that my family had done business with for years?

My family definitely wouldn’t. At least, not at first. 

Oh how they’d learn, though. 

Another nice thing about Zemo that would allow him to survive is his aggressive politeness.

No matter how many weird glances or dirty looks he got over the course of dinner, he would simply continue to be the best version of himself in the hopes of impressing everyone. 

He would even pretend to enjoy my great aunt’s cooking and get himself seconds, because I’m sure it would be easier to scarf down than whatever he and his EKO Scorpion squad had to eat while serving in the Sokovian special forces. 

On the tail end of reasons he would be accepted, Helmut Zemo drinks alcohol like it’s water, so he would fit right in drinking white wine and cocktails through the night with the rest of the adults. 

((I think he’d totally tease me about not being able to drink with him, but that’s a story for another time. Anyways...))

His slight downfall would come from something entirely uncontrollable by him or anybody else. 

And that something would be my flirty aunt. 

I love my aunt. She’s wonderful in her own special way. 

That being said, I know if a hot Sokovian baron with a nice smile and a fat pocketbook showed up to one of out holidays, even if he was introduced as my partner, she would be going for the kill all night long. 

This would make Helmut more and more uncomfortable as she got more and more drunk, because lets face it, he’s probably not very comfortable with being touched by near-strangers anyways, and being touched by a drunk member of his partners family who is very obviously coming on to him? 

That’s even more difficult to deal with. 

That being said, Helmut is a man who has been shown to be extremely in control of his emotions. 

He would swallow down whatever awkwardness he felt, make it to the end of the night, and, once he had escaped her clutches, he would politely say that he was never going back to another holiday function with my family again, though he would be happy to facilitate me still attending them. 

So, in the end, Helmut Zemo would survive one holiday with his sheer stubborn politeness alone. 

I will say that his patience would absolutely wear thin if he attended a couple more holidays and he would eventually die of a stress induced heart attack after being unable to politely decline my aunt’s advances. 

For now, though, he’s safe.

[cuteykat]

Perhaps some angst/fluff if you're up for it? Maybe Shanks and Luffy who's s/o just wants them to take something seriously for once? But like usual they kinda just let other people walk all over them/insult them and they don't care? So their s/o who is nOT A FIGHTER tries to teach the bastards who insulted them some manners?

But she ends up getting kidnapped or something? Fluffy ending with angry Shanks and Angry Luffy? S/o finally sees them taking something very seriously.

I'd prolly be terrified watching them go from ☺️😘🙂 to 😠😡👿

Warning: mention of stockholm syndrome in luffy’s reading!

Word count: 2.5k words

Luffy:

It was a rainy day on a fall island. You and the rest of your crewmates decided on coming to the island for supplies but for the upcoming storm that was soon to come, they decided to stay here and stay in a hotel. Everyone had their room except you and Luffy to which you shared one. You both decided it would be nice to spend more quality time with each other and this afternoon you both decided to go on a date to a nice small restaurant. Everything was going great till Luffy started bringing up how he wanted to be a pirate king and people started laughing

“ Seriously?! King of the pirates?! What kind of joke is that!!” Laughter could be heard as more people smoke “ Are you that stupid?”

You try to speak up but Luffy stops you and smiles at you. You both get your food but all you could focus on was people laughing at him “ Luffy you aren't going to do anything about it?” You ask having your voice be laced with irritation

“ Why would I?” Your lover ask while shoving food in his face

“ Because it’s not right for being to make fun of you! Your dream is inspirational and is a part of you. Plus” you start to mumble “ all I can hear is people laugh at you and it hurts to know that you're just letting it happen”

“ It doesn’t bother me (name). You shouldn’t let it bother you either, it’s not like they are making fun of you” Luffy finishes up what seems to be his 4th plate before asking for more

The whole date was a disaster and you had it when people started throwing stuff at the man “We're leaving!”

Luffy goes to ask you why till he sees tears forming down your eyes. You both leave the restaurant not noticing how some people were staring at you.

Both of you get to your room and you sign hearing the rainfall and the thunder hit the ground. You put your hands in your face and when Luffy goes to hug you, you deny him “ Luffy I need to go for a walk. I’m not upset at you, well I am but more upset at the others” you walk to the door and give him an air kiss before opening the door and leaving to walk to the lobby

“ I love you Luffy, I just wish you wouldn’t let people walk all over you like that. Maybe I’m just not understanding his view on all this. I should apologize” you go to walk back but you feel someone grab you by the throat and feel a cloth over your mouth before passing out into someone’s arm.

An hour goes by and Luffy starts to get concerned. Usually, when you are upset you take a 30-minute walk at most, and not noticing it’s been an hour he starts to worry and goes to Nami’s door to which she opens looking confused

“ Has (name) come here at all?” Luffy asks to which the women look surprised

“I thought you two were on a date. She hasn’t come here. Did you do something lu-“ she sees Luffy start to worry before seeing women walk to them with an envelope in her hands

“ Monkey D Luffy. Open this when you are alone. It’s an important note for you” the women let out a small smirk before leaving having her skirt drag against the floor

Nami looks worried before seeing Luffy walk off but knows once Luffy has his mindset on something you can’t change it but decides to let everyone know about what’s going on.

Luffy goes back to his and your share room and opens the envelope reading the letter

‘ To the man who wants to become king of the pirates.

We heard of your little dream back at the restaurant and when you didn’t get angry at it we decided if you really could be strong enough to somehow make that idiotic dream of yours reality. So let’s play a game, shall we? You and you alone shall try to find out the base is in town. You have 24 hours before we leave. If you win you can take back your lover. If you lose we keep this adorable girl like ours.

You have 24 hours since the envelope was delivered to you. Have fun and if you try to get any help, the girl gets punished’

Luffy's aura intensifies. He’s filled with rage, he was gonna kill the bastard who kidnapped you if it’s the last thing he does. He storms off out of the hotel into the cold rain.

You were awake now being in a strong caged. Your limbs tied up to a wall with chains and only a small bowl of water like you were some animal. You try to pull on the chains to which you felt a shock of electricity go through your body making you scream. You see two men walk up to you as one goes to hold your chin

“ Such an adorable little pet aren't you? But as a pet we have a few rules you will follow. If you don’t you will be punished. The more you misbehave the worse the punishment is.” He stands up and claps his hand as one of his men now speaks

“ The rules are as listed, no pulling on your chains, no asking where you are, no begging for food, water, or any mundane things like that. No asking for personal information. No going against what the leader says. And rules that may be added to the list” the man leaves before a woman enters being beautifully dressed up and hugs the leader

“ I use to be his hostage but now I can’t get enough of him and I wanted a new plaything too and you seemed too cute to pass up. Don’t worry love, you will grow to love it as I did along with his other lovers. Who could deny such a beauty like him? A real pirate”

“ He’s not a real pirate-“ you start to scream being shocked again but with higher volts and start to cry. Your body goes limp against the chains. Your lips part as your breathing gets heavy. You were in so much pain already. Physically but also emotionally. You felt so weak and so scared. You wanted to fight back but couldn’t. You close your eyes wanting to see Luffy again and your crew. You wanted to be saved and held into your lover's arm and hear his laughter, to see his smile, to feel his heartbeat and feel warm in his arms “ Luffy...” you put your head on the ground having it be near the water bowl

“ Aw, is my new pet thirsty? Go ahead and drink up, I won’t deny you water. And if you behave you will get some yummy food later. And in 24 hours you can get so much more~” he smirks watching your figure. You were so cute, so beautiful. He wanted you to be all his, to make you his pet, his plaything.

Time goes on, hours felt like days to you. You were exhausted, wanted to be free wanting to be with Luffy. You couldn’t cry, Couldn’t scream couldn’t do anything except being a rag doll. You were starting to lose hope until you hear a scream from one of the henchmen. Your body lifted you on your own having your hopes start to be lifted and next you knew it you see him, your lover, Luffy. He was different from his regular cheerful self. His aura was strong, violent. It was pure anger and hatred.

“ Luffy” you call out quietly having your arms tug on the chain not caring if you get shocked.

Luffy looks over to you. He was concerned but he had to deal with the other problem at hand first. He grabs one of the men looking directly at them, daggers in his eyes. “ where’s your leader?!” Once the man answers he puts them down and finds the leader. You see Luffy walk away but the next minute you could hear screaming and crying. You had a feeling Luffy was taking care of the problem. Everything went silent for a minute as the cuff comes undone and the cage opens. You try to stand and go to him but your legs shake being in pain along with your arms and neck. Luffy scoops you up gently and hugs you like he never wanted to leave your side again

“ Let’s get you back to the hotel and have chopper check your wounds. I promise I won’t let those things happen again”

You nod your head and close your eyes falling asleep. You were exhausted. Luffy carries you back to the hotel where he brings you to chopper who looks surprised but starts to work on you carefully not wanting to hurt you. Luffy stays right beside you having his usual smile not come back yet.

After a bit you wake up to see your captain look at you. You notice he isn’t smiling and you move your arms ignoring the pain to grab his mouth and form it into a smile “ I don’t like seeing you this upset. I love you Luffy and I love your smile”

Luffy was still upset but seeing you awake makes him feel better and he starts to smile and put his straw hat on you before getting into bed with you and hugs you slowly going back to his regular self. You both make jokes till you fall asleep again. Your head on his chest and his fingers roaming your hair “ No one will ever hurt you again” He was gonna be the pirate king and make sure no one would ever hurt you again.

Shanks:

Today was a sunny day as you and your crewmates had stopped on an island to stock up on some things. You along with the rest of your crew were now drinking at a bar partying like usual. You sing and drank with everyone until some other people started making fun of shanks and throwing alcohol at him. You couldn’t stand it anymore. This was supposed to be a friendly party. You were getting upset and one-sentence sit your mind to ablaze

“ How are you even a pirate with one arm?!” They laugh and made fun of to which everyone just laughed off like it didn’t bother you, and especially shanks to who smiled and laughed it off

“ How is this not bothering you shanks?! You are the best pirate and you are gonna let them walk all over you? I can’t sit here and watch it!” You usually never yell and lash out but the alcohol you drank changed that “ You are not going to do anything?!”

“ Why would it bother me cutie?” Shanks says holding up his glass to which you pushed away causing the man to be shocked

“ I’m not gonna sit here and watch all this happen! I can’t stand when people make fun of the people I care about! I-I’m heading back to the ship!” You get up and walk to the ship to which shanks wondered why you were so bothered about it.

You walked to the dock until a man grabs you from behind pulling you close from the waist, a knife to your neck “ Do you belong to that red hair pirate? You know we are looking for some beautiful pirates to join us?” The man licks his lips to which you try to get away but the grip on your waist becomes are hard as a vice grip he cuts off part of your hair on digs the knife into your neck having a bit of blood drip “Don’t you dare try to run darling. We wouldn’t want to mess up your beautiful skin now, would we? Men!”

Three-man come up and tie your arms and legs together putting along with a cloth in your mouth and bring you to their ship which wasn’t that far but hard to see in the dark.

45 minutes go by and shanks get concerned. He knew you were drunk but the thought of you being hurt concerned him. He rather takes you being angry than hurt. He goes to stand up when hearing a flare go off and the other people that were there smirk and leave and before they all leave a smirk looking at shanks “ Make sure you have... everything~”

Shanks immediately caught on. You weren’t back and the leader had left and now they are leaving to a signal of a flare. He didn’t like this one bit.

Within a second he next to one of them holding him by the neck “ Where is she?!” His grip gets sharp and his eyes turn into daggers “ If you don’t wish to tell me you may not get your last word” he says with venom laced into his words. To anyone who pissed Shanks off was getting a death wish. The man and his crewmates caught onto this and regretted this decision by their leader.

The man being held by the neck speaks “ The docks on the right side of this island” he chocks out and falls to the ground to which shanks crew tries to follow him but shanks look at them giving them a signal to go to their ship.

Shanks walks to get to you, everyone who saw was immediately scared. Who dared to upset this man and what would happen to said person. People avoided him and when getting to the ship he didn’t dare to hold back the way he felt. She stepped inside having the waves shake and he sees a man holding you by the chin whispering sweet nothings in your ears.

You looked over and try to run to shanks but the chains kept you doing so but before you could say anything the chains were cut off making you run and hold your lover tightly. His arm holding your body to which he saw the man looking scared and backing away

“ One thing you should know. You may laugh at me, make fun of me and do what you think is funny. But the minute you hurt my crew and my lover, your DEAD” shanks picks you up and holds you walking away “ Let’s get you back love. I promise no one will ever lay a hand on you again darling” shanks start to carry you away but looks back at the men glaring at him to which he will never forget “ Your lucky you didn’t hurt her. There would not remain a single piece of you left”

Shanks gets you off the boat and brings you back to their ship where he holds you in his arm and the lap the rest of the night.

I hope you enjoy reading it!!

[jgnico]

i read a comment on twitter i believe saying people who dislike gojohime but ship satosugu are hypocrites because geto betrayed gojo and gojo murdered geto. so no, i don't think they realise utahime dislikes gojo, the reach of that nor the damaging behaviour behind trying to make gojo x utahime a thing. i think they believe their fights are a sign of chemistry, as if utahime is a tsundere. they cannot comprehend that she's an adult and the implications of gojo's behaviour towards her. or even the impacts of his sole existence. it's quite weird because the whole point of jjk seems to jump over their head. gege introduced in jjk the topic of mysoginy, developed it quite a bit and talked about how women are treated in jjk society but they believe that's a sign of romance somehow. i don't understand how that makes sense tbh

Not even gonna touch disputes on shipping, --because that's always a headache to get into-- but Geto presents more as an equal to Gojo.

When they fight in that first chapter of the arc its because Gojo is calling out Geto's logic toward his duty as a sorcerer. Its a difference of opinions toward their jobs, but we know that they're both arguing from the same pedestal as Special Grades. Even with Geto's betrayal and death, they never stopped being equals.

With Utahime, it's just Gojo picking on someone weaker than him, both in terms of raw power and within Jujutsu society. I doubt that its intentionally malicious (because he's a teenager and he likes getting a rise out of people, that's his personality) but Gojo also benefits from the fact that he outranked her from the day he was born.

On top of that, Geto also gets called out (by Mei Mei iirc) for calling Utahime weak, because he may not have a rare clan technique that made him a Special Grade at birth, but he certainly was one by the time we see him in that chapter. So him and Gojo are in the same boat here.

Both of them benefit from being born extraordinarily powerful in a system that rewards strength, but they have the added benefit of being men in a society that will automatically place them above their female counterparts. (Makes you wonder why the only female special-grade is so focused on getting rid of Curses and by exstension, the need for that society to exist in the first place.)

So I can't see Utahime having any kind of affection for a man that has always been placed above her by the people around her despite her own capabilities as a Grade 1 (which is incredibly strong as far as Sorcerers are concerned) and who constantly reminds her of that fact. Even moving into their lives as adults, he still makes it hard for her to keep the respect that she worked hard for.

It's just wild to me that Gege can show us over and over again that Jujutsu society has a very real and prevalent problem with misogyny (including Momo blatantly laying it out for us during the exchange event) and it's just... swept under the rug for "what-ifs."

[therealvinelle]

Vinelle (and muffin since I know they'll see this too~!), I don't know if you guys have made a post ranking the Twilight books and why (including Bree and L&D if applicable) but I'd love to hear your opinions! (also if you could rank the Twi movies from least worst to most worst and why that'd be awesome too! 030 hi key love your rants on the movies and would love to hear y'alls thoughts more on them)-Sw

You’ve caught us out, anon.

And thanks to you, we spent last night watching Breaking Dawn Part 2 so we could rank it. @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin hadn’t seen it at all, while I half-remembered it from years ago. A terrible time was had because that movie was unwatchably bad.

Since this ask was sent jointly, our answer was co-written.

So, without further ado, movies first:

1. Twilight

This is a bad movie, but it’s recognizably a movie. The scenes are connected, there are things it did well, and we could tell you what the plot is. The awkwardness, for instance, is very well done. The weaknesses are glaring, the main one being that the film never sells us on the characters of Bella and Edward, nor on their relationship, relying instead on the audience knowing they’re in love because- well, they’re in love.

Diving deeper into Edward and Bella, there’s an understandable explanation for this. Edward of the books is terrifying, and I don’t think there’s a translation to screen that could have kept the romantic atmosphere surrounding him that we see from Bella’s point of view.

Bella can listen to Edward eating Biology and how he explains that it means how much he loves her and not blink. An actual audience hearing that dialogue will have second thoughts.

Right out of the gate, Twilight has a very difficult task: Salvage Edward Cullen while still producing a somewhat recognizable character who will take the same actions (or near the same actions) that Edward Cullen did in the book.

In the effort to make Edward palatable but save some of his original character he loses his more terrifying lines (as well as his hilarious ego) but becomes weird, awkward, and vaguely creepy. Edward Cullen of the films is that weird, friendless guy in your high school who you feel kind of bad for but don’t want to eat lunch with.

Bella faces a similar transformation. Bella’s insecurity is completely removed (or else the screenwriters somehow failed to notice it). As a result, we get this strange antisocial girl who is too cool for school because she’s a stuck up bitch.

Between Edward, this creepy guy who sits next to her in Biology, and Bella, this girl who enters school too good for everyone else, we see no reason why they would ever be interested in one another.

In an attempt to make these characters likeable they made them both unlikeable and boring. The film series as a whole never recovers from this (indeed, the quest to make Edward look good keeps leading to stranger and stranger places). 

It also forgets to explain why the Cullens live among humans, they’re attending high school… because. It’s a movie that explained to us all those terrible 2010 era memes and “still a better love story than Twilight”. And frankly, those memes were great, better than the movie. Case in point.

Everything is weirdly blue, which is atmospheric but also makes everything and everyone washed out. Everyone is super pale, so you have Mike looking just as vampire-y as Edward. However, it’s recognizably a movie. It introduces the characters, recognizes that the audience needs to be informed of things that are important to the plot, and most scenes are in some way connected to the plot. This is more than can be said for the other films, which is why it lands the top slot.

2. Eclipse

Eclipse earns its second place by process of elimination. The remaining three were worse. Eclipse also features Edward being cuckolded mercilessly, which is hilarious. Oh, and Victoria playing Riley, that was another beautiful scene.

Apart from that it’s just a deeply boring, borderline unwatchable movie.

Special shoutouts go to:

The opening scene of Riley getting turned, a ridiculous and poorly executed scene that served no purpose for the movie whatsoever.

Rosalie dropping her backstory without any context, Bella walks up to her and Rosalie launches into this horrific story for no particular reason. Both her and Jasper’s backstories could have been cut, as they served no purpose to the story and felt really thrown in there.

The many, many redundant scenes. The Victoria chase that ends with the Cullens and Quileutes squabbling could have been cut entirely. So too could the Seattle subplot with the newborns and Bree.

It’s a movie that isn’t about anything in particular, so it throws subplot spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks. It dutifully regurgitates the Jacob/Bella/Edward love triangle while also trying to convey that Bella’s about to lose her mortality, while also trying to introduce suspense and excitement with the newborns. It fails to execute either of these, and it also fails to tie them together.

3. New Moon

The movie that wanted to skip itself.

This movie had two jobs, show that Bella is depressed when Edward leaves and convince the audience of Bella and Jacob’s strong friendship. And apart the rotating shots and the occasional Stewart voiceover, the former becomes one of those “just stay with us on this one, guys” failures, and the second is failed on every level. Jake and Bella are much closer at the beginning of this movie than they were in canon, and a montage of Bella hanging out with her buddy is just that, it’s a montage of Bella hanging out with her buddy. It speaks volumes that Stewart’s voiceover has to remind us she’s depressed and Jacob is helping her heal, because there’s no indicator on screen that this is happening.

This, in turn, makes Bella/Jake as weak and unconvincing as Bella/Edward was in the previous movie. We just have to take on faith that these people are important to each other because that’s what we’re told.

There’s also the wolves, who are completely butchered. In the books, there’s this great mystery with bears in the woods, there’s Bella wondering why Laurent ran off, there’s build-up, then when we find out what’s actually been happening it’s a satisfying explanation, all the pieces come together really nicely. This is not the case in the movie. Meeting the pack is just weird in this context, because we never wondered who they were. Bella is randomly invited to breakfast, we meet Emily with the scarred face who won’t ever have a line again, and that’s it, these characters don’t become important to the movie in any way. It’s a pointless scene that could have been cut, much like so many other scenes in these movies.

Apart from that, the Volturi scene from the books is butchered so I hardly recognize it, and Alice, Carlisle, and Edward’s characters are assassinated to an impressive degree considering they were barely in the movie.

It was hard to watch.

It lands third place because somehow, Breaking Dawn was worse.

4. Breaking Dawn Part Two

I’ll just list the positives: the intro was very pretty and promised a better movie. It was also long, which we appreciated because it took away from the movie’s runtime. (This is not at all an exaggeration, a lot of the time watching all five movies was spent looking at the remaining runtime and groaning.) The Tommy Wiseau sex scene in the sex cabin was uncomfortable, but the fact that it would have fit perfectly in The Room made it funny. The Romanians were genuinely, unironically, great, because of all of Carlisle’s trashy friends, these were the only ones the movie didn’t try to convince us weren’t trashy.

This movie ranks above Breaking Dawn Part One because of the things listed above.

Apart from that, something all of these movies, but especially the last four, suffer from is that they don’t have plots so much as they have a check list of things to put in the movie before they can call it a wrap. This movie is the worst offender of that, and it’s made worse by the film’s expectation that the people are fans who already know what’s happening, and therefore don’t need anything explained. I’ll explain what we mean by that.

We get Bella waking up a vampire, and absolutely nothing is explained. If you don’t know what happened in the last movie then fuck you. Bella then goes hunting, we get the hiker, we get the mountain lion, she goes back to meet Renesmée, finds out Jake imprinted on her daughter, we get the sex cabin, the handwrestling with Emmett. The Charlie problem is introduced (poorly), only to be solved a scene later with emotional payoff that had absolutely no buildup. All of these things, and the rest of the movie as well for that matter, feels like we’re just crossing items off a list.

Since the audience is expected to already know the story, the story only bothers to explain about half of what’s happening, if half. Who’s the lady living with Charlie? If you don’t know, don’t worry because it’s not important anyway. When did Kate and Garrett fall in love? If you don’t care, that's understandable, because they’ve barely interacted in the movie. Who are the Amazonian women? Do they have names? Don’t worry about it. Did Alistair actually leave, if so did that have an impact? Well, Bella stared at a window for a few seconds.

Every so often the characters will start quoting the books, and it’ll be completely out of place because these movies veered off course long ago. Carlisle references his great friendship with Aro, a friendship that was only briefly mentioned at the beginning of the second movie. Aro randomly starts talking about how scary human technology is.

All of these scenes feel like Marcus is telling the story, he’s just listing events waiting for the story to be over, and forgets a lot of pertinent details because he doesn’t care enough to remember them. There’s no effort to tie these scenes together, no effort to build up to anything.

There’s also one significant failure, and this is a failure shared by all five films, but it affects the plot (I use the term “plot” loosely) of this movie which is why it gets a special shoutout here. Vampires in these movies look human. The fact that Bella has to ask Edward is Gianna the secretary is human says it all, because in the books you know instantly, there’s not even a question. This makes the Charlie subplot ridiculous, because Bella looks and acts the same as ever. She had a trashy makeover, maybe, but she’s still Bella. Watching her get human acting classes after we watched her act perfectly human is just silly. Now, we’re all for suspension of belief, but this movie just pencil drew a moustache on her and the audience is supposed to go “My god, Bella, I didn’t recognize you!”

We then get to the atrocious fight scene, which was somehow worse than I remembered. It was also oddly long for a giant fake out. This scene took significant run time and it turns out to have 0 effect on the plot. And when we get back to the real world, the tonal shift is extreme. You can’t go from Jane being choked, dragged across the snow and face eaten by a wolf to her standing around chilling. We could have skipped it entirely, just had Alice touch Aro’s hand, and he goes “Ah, I see, cheerio.”

The end credits were pretty funny, “here are these random characters with bit parts in previous movies, isn’t this nostalgic?”. Nice try, movie. The fact this came after an extended clip show of the great romance of Edward and Bella, through blurry montage images that failed to be convincing in their original films let alone this one, just made it even more hilarious. Hope you didn’t completely ruin the director’s career, though honestly you should a bit.

5. Breaking Dawn Part One

As you can probably tell by the above entries, the fact that this is the worst one is really saying something. All the movies were hard to watch, but this one required pure strength of will to power through.

The big issue is that Breaking Dawn shouldn’t have been split in the first place. However, it was, and that meant that we got a movie that was almost entirely filler. (Followed, somehow, by a movie that was also largely filler.)

We get everybody preparing for the wedding. What do Mike and Jessica think of Bella and Edward getting married? What’s that, you don’t care? Well, now you know anyway. We get the full wedding, as in the whole fucking thing, including the afterparty. We get Bella and Edward traveling to their island, and there’s filler in the filler where they go clubbing in Rio. We then get every minute detail of the wedding night followed by every minute detail of the honeymoon.

There’s fanservice, and then there’s this. This was live action fanfiction.

NOTHING that in any way is relevant to the story happens, the closest we get is Irina looking stoned. Too bad the Denali’ refusal to help out in Eclipse was cut from the last movie, in fact I’m not sure they were mentioned at all previously in these movies (I think maybe Edward had a one-line reference in Twilight?) so this means nothing to people who haven’t read the books.

We then get to the pregnancy arc, which could have been Rosemary’s Baby but is instead as outrageously boring as the first half of the movie was. The director must have realized as much, because he gives us Jacob’s alpha plot that should have been cut from the movie (yes, I know it was in the books, but the thing about adaptations is that things have to go. For the record, I think Meyer should have cut it too). That subplot was straight out of an anime, by the way. Jacob claiming his ancestral rights as alpha while listing off his titles and the soaring music, was… every shounen anime, ever. Complete with the shitty voice acting.

It was a soul-crushingly boring movie.

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Something that screws over the last four movies is that they were made to feed the fangirls, and generate revenue because the producers knew the fans were coming to watch the books they liked come to life, so they just had to throw scenes from the books and into the movies and let the magic happen. This is a terrible way to adapt something.

Special shoutout too to having to watch Taylor Lautner run around shirtless in four out of five movies. That was very uncomfortable and none of us needed that in our lives, Lautner included.

Super special shoutout to the fact that we disagree with nearly all the casting.

And this isn’t the post for that, but all of the characters were butchered. Some more than others, and some more insidiously than others. It’s the big things, like Carlisle’s character being turned on its head since he thinks all vampires are damned, exactly the opposite of what he thinks in the books, and the little things, like Jasper and Bella being buddies who bicker fondly in New Moon. 

Then the books:

1. Midnight Sun

HANDS DOWN. This is easily our favorite thing to come out of the entire Twilight franchise.

Edward is every kind of crazy at the same time, all the time, and it makes every single sentence packed with delirious entertainment. Reading this book is having a stroke, a psychotic episode, and watching five different true crime shows all at once. We adore every letter of it. (That’s no exaggeration, we even laughed about Edward capitalizing “Son” when Carlisle refers to him as “son” in conversation.)

The book was more than we’d dared to hope for, one of those rare books that makes you go “This was written just for me.”

2. Twilight

The one that started it all.

Vampires are wonderfully creepy. Things like Bella staring at Carlisle acting like the mundane town doctor shortly after learning just how old he is, Alice explaining how vampires kill all, and the uncanny valley perfection of the Cullens all add to the otherness of these vampires, and the general atmosphere of the book.

The love story is convincing. Edward seen through the eyes of Bella is wonderful, the red flags are there but if it weren’t for the books that followed we wouldn’t have decried the ship the way we do.

3. Eclipse

Breaking Dawn is the more interesting book, but Eclipse has less things we outright don’t like. We get to know all the characters better, Edward and Bella are their usual beautiful selves, and it’s overall peak Twilight.

4. Breaking Dawn

Would have ranked much higher, we like what it did. Without it we wouldn’t be in this fandom now, as it brought so much amazing content. The baby plot is fine by us, Carlisle’s friends are great, the Volturi confrontation is a beautiful, if bleak culmination of preventable events. There’s a lot of great stuff in this book.

Unfortunately, and there’s just no diplomatic way to put this, so I’ll just come out with it: there’s too much Jacob.

He no longer had a reason to be in the story, given the way Eclipse ended he had every reason not to be in it. In spite of that we get an entire third of the book from his point of view, and then damned if he’s not shoehorned into the last third as well. He added absolutely nothing to the story, he was just there taking up space and being possessive of a toddler. His POV section was tough to get through, and his presence in book three was just painful. He should have been cut.

5. New Moon

This was the book we had to power through. There are some very good things in it, most notably the Volturi scene, but the Muffin and I enjoy Twilight for the vampires, and that makes Laurent and Hallucination!Edward the highlights of the part of the book where Edward is gone.

There’s also the fact that Jacob isn’t a very compelling character. He has to carry the book now that the Cullens aren’t doing it, and he simply isn’t up for it.

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Yes, we’re aware that these books are ranked according to how much Jacob is in them. We don’t even hate him, not at all, it’s just that he’s boring.

(That being said, the books at their worst are better than the movies at their best. Jacob narrating his perfect playdate with Renesmée would still be preferable to… I’m trying to think of a good scene from the movies. Hm, nevermind.)

As for The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner and Life and Death, only I have read Bree Tanner and I don’t remember it well enough to give a proper assessment. I was bored with the OCs, though, bored to tears, throughout that book I was itching for Victoria and the Cullens. We have not read Life and Death, but we’re offended by its existence so it ranks bottom.