#you know how embarrassing it is to have worse trains that indiana?

[sherdnerd]

May have had to pass up an archaeology job because of this city's woefully inadequate public transportation. I hate it here.

[queenofwerewolves]

Future Hope - chapter 1.5 - Practice Makes Perfect

Our heroes didnt get their powers and knew from night to day how to manage them, especially those who had physical changes to their body. Our soon-to-be heroes were all reunited in Maria's house, they had planed to spend the afternoon practing and exploring their new limits and abilities, all helping eitch other.

They decided since Griff had the biggest change, they would focus on him first. At the moment they were out in backyard, eitch one giving suggestions on what to begin first.

"Pick us all up at once with your new muscles!" Said Muffin excitedly. "That's still too light! Pick us all up plus Maria's car" Said Spike, chewing once again on a bubblegum.

"You all leave Hellride out of this!" Maria responded angrily. "That car was expensive as fuck and I refuse to go back to a life of Ubers!" She crossed her arms, indignified.

"You named your car?" Kip answered from high up a tree branch, as cats do. "I name all my belongings, what of it?" Maria answered. "And they're all cool names, too".

"Hellride? Really?" Spiked scoffed. "Because she rides fast as Hell! Look can we get back on track and find something for Griff to test his strenght?!" Maria answered nervously with a touch of embarrassment.

"Unless we find an Indiana Jones boulder for him to spin on his finger like a damn basketball we arent gonna get any damn progress!" Spike shouted back.

Maria sighed and shook her head. "I hate it when you have a point.." Griff nervously scratched the back of his head. "There must be something we can do.." He quietly mumbled out.

"I got it!" Muffin shouted, they all turned to face her. "I forgot Im a fairy! I can just poof something up!" She said excitedly. Everyone stared at her with either a confused or shocked look.

"..How... Do you FORGET that you're a fairy?!" Spike blurted out nervously. "You have fucking wings! How does one forget they have huge pink glittery wings?!"

Muffin just shrugged.

Maria smiled wide. "OK Muffin, give us something huge and heavy for Griff to use!" Muffin nodded and grabbed her wand which had a muffin on the tip. "Wand cook, beat and bake! Give us a big large and tasty cupcake!" She waved her wand and out appeared from a bunch of pink glittery smoke, a nearly two-story house tall chocolate cupcake.

"... Why a cupcake..?" Blink asked as she peeked behind her mask, in slight awe and wanting to secretly a bite out of it. "I can only make sweets!" Muffin said with a shy tone. "Im not a fighter like you guys, I only want to make people happy and eat candy!"

"That is certainly the biggest pastry I've ever seen! So large and beautiful, I bet tasty as well!" "Not to mention DIABETIC AS HELL!!! We could die from a heart attack eating that! Or worse, we could get fat! Even fatter! And become even uglier then we already are! This is too overwealming I need a nap!"

Rooko and Rooki suddenly spoke, almost taking everyone off guard on how their friend Rook is suddenly two split personalities now based on the Youtube character ENA, one is always happy while the other is always sad, and depending on the situation they can go Manic or Miserable.

"OK Griff, show us what you can do!" Maria shouted excitedly. Without missing a second, Griff bent over and gripped the edge of the massive cupcake, after struggling a bit he slowly but surely, lifted the entire thing over his head, smiling proudly.

His friends cheered and applauded proudly. Feeling satisfied, he dropped the cupcake and dusted the chocolate crumbs off his hands and fur. "Yokusei!" He shouted, and with a naruto-like smoke poof, he turned back to his human self. Maria ran and hugged him tightly, which Griff embraced and hugged back with a slight twirl.

"Griff you were amazing!!" Maria said with a proud tone, Griff slightly blushed pink at the small punk girl and her excitement. "Oh shucks, it was nothing.." He said with a shy tone.

"Well, and seems we concluded Griffin's training." Togekiss said as they took a sip of tea. "He jump twice as high as a two-story house, his punches and kicks can knock down brick walls and possibly more if we werent limited on objects to test it with, he can hear twice as much then a dog could with his ears, and his sense of smell is impecable. Truly Griff is a strong asset to our team."

"I can only train my powers at night.." Said Spooks, holding an umbrella to protect her from the sun, now that it injures her. "Muffin's power is only sweet making. Togekiss has exceptional I.Q and can see simulations in the future like Garnet in Steven Universe, along with their strong telekenisis, and Kip simply draws whatever she desires, whether alive or not and it becomes a reality... That means it's Rook's turn to show us what she can do" She finished.

"Wonderful! It's our time to shine!" "I-I-I not ready! Everyone's gonna laugh at us! I-I might piss myself in fear!" "Oh pull yourself together dear! Our friends wont laugh at us!" "How do we know that?! They're just waiting to correct us on a dumb mistake!!!"

Rook's body shook and twitched as her eyes turned to static, suddenly her entire eyes turned black with a blue iris, she turned Miserable.

"They're gonna laugh and point at our foolish selves, we're gonna be so embarrassed that we'll wish that the Earth will swallow us whole and just fucking kill us now!! Go ahead! Laugh at us and our misfortune!!!"

"ooh shit" Maria said. "can someone calm her down?"

Rook's eyes change to regular as her Miserable side went away. "No need my good Queen! We are completly fine! Now prepare to be dazzled as we show you all what we can do!" q

Rook pulled out a harry potter-like wooden wand, waved it around. "Bloom and Blossom and protect who I love! Rise my pretties, rise high and above!" Rooki shot an orange light at the grass, which made dozens of flowers bloom and grow around Spike and Blink.

"This is only one of my tricks! It's a shield that protects them from almost anything! My main weakness is fire, because while plants are beautiful, they are also sadly very, very flammable"

"Cool." Said Spike before using his bat to aggressivly hit the flowers and the vines aside so he and Blink could leave.

"M-M-My turn I guess!" Rook took hold of the wand and waved it in circles. "Razzle Dazzle Shine and Show, make their body move it low!" Rooko shot a blue light at Spooks, which made unwillingly and uncontrolably start dancing and as the spell said, make her go low.

"O-OH GOD SOMEONE MAKE IT STOP I DONT LIKE HOW MY BUTT IS MOVING THIS MUCH!!" She shouted in desperation as she made a split and moved it even lower.

"M-My deal is with music! I-It works as a way of distraction o-or hypnosis and it lasts for 30 minutes un-le-less I say otherwise! I-I know it's a sucky power!"

"OK COOL CAN I STOP DANCING PLEASE IM GETTING A CRAMP!!!" Yelled Spooks, practically begging. Rooko flicked her wand and Spooks fell on the ground, panting. "OH MY POOR HAMSTRINGS THEY ACHE!!" She yelled in utter pain, meanwhile Maria and Spike were absolutely losing it.

"O-OH GOD MY STOMACH HURTS-" Said Spike in between laughter.

"OK you guys cool it" Said Blink. "It's our turn to practice now. We're the only ones who use regular weapons." She said drawing her sword and positioning her mask back in place.

"O-OK! OK!" Maria said getting up, she pulled out a small staff and whipped it, making it stretch out wide into a full, large red and black scythe, with a rose print on the blade. Spike spun his bat and spat his gum out.

"So. Who's ass Im kicking first?" Said Spike. "Wait on second thought this might be unfair." Said Blink. "Me and Maria had blades while Spike has a bat, maybe we should-"

Before she could finish, Spike swung his bat and hit Blink sword, knocking it out of her hand before kicking her back at the ground. Blink fell back hard before she could even process what happen, dumbfounded but angry, she snarled. "Oh it's on now Motherfucker." She extended her hand and the sword flew back to her hand, as she charged towards Spike, who moved out of the way as soon as Blink swung her sword, which if he hadnt been for Maria's scythe, would have sliced her right up.

"Dude! Chill! This is a pratice!" Maria spoke as both of their blades were against eitch other. Blink hopped and flipped over her and landed on a tree branch, croutching like a ninja. She put her hands together and in a small puff of smoke and disappeared. Spike and Maria were back to back, ready to counterattack Blink, what they didnt expect was for her to attack from underground.

Buring up from the dirt, she got both of them off their feet and charged after Spike, who barely managed to regain his balance before his using bat his block Blink's sword. A back and forth of clash-clings-and-clangs between metal begun, one attacking the other but eitch blocking every attack again and again.

Spike ducked a sword slash and roundhouse kick Blink's leg, which was effective since she's practically a ninja. She backflipped back on her feet and kept attacking swiftly. But a sudden scythe blade cut in between them, stopping the fight.

"That's enough!!!" Maria shouted. "You both are gonna end up hurting yourselves or eitch other! im ending it now!!"

"Oh what the hell dude?!" Blink shouted indignified. "I was about to beat him!!" "Oh please." Answered Spike. "Was that the best you could do? Sakura could do a better job kicking my ass" He scoffed. They began to argue loudly, genuinely angry at eitch other.

"THAT"S ENOUGH!!!!" Maria shouted, making them, and everyone else look at her.

"It doesnt matter would win that fight! This was a practice and not a competition!! The point of us being a team and getting powers in the first place was for all of us to make the world a better place, but the only way that can happen is if all of us work together!! As a team!!!"

They stood in silence, listening to her talk and set them straight.

"As cheesy as that sounds, it's true!! We shouldnt fight eitch other like this, you're not just my friends, we're all friends with eitch other! We all go along well and we know that, that's why I got you all together, because no one can bond better in a team then all of us together!!!"

"... She's right." Togekiss added, walking towards them. "We all started as simple individuals with free time on a website, but we all shared common interests, we grew closer.. And suddenly like that, we all became friends.. A family, if you will."

"We take care of eitch other and look out for one another." Said Spooks.

"Just like how you all did for me.. When I almost died. Almost died because of the shit and violent world we live in." Maria said.. With a slight crack in her voice.

"You're bringing in the same violence that almost killed me.. So please.. Please stop fighting.. We're all in this together.. Right..?"

Spike and Blink dropped their weapons and hugged Maria, and everyone else joined in as well.

"You're right, we're sorry Queen." Said Spike. "We got overwhealmed and we didnt mean it. We wont fight again, because you're right." Added Blink.

"We only have eitch other in this world, and if we want to change it we have to stick together, just like you said." Spike said one more time.

"And we wont let you down.. We promise.." Griff finished, with everyone agreeing with what he said.

And so they stayed for a moment, embraced within eitch other in a group hug. A family isnt perfect, there will be disagreements, but a good bond will always overcome those disagreements, and that's what they had, a good bond.

A bond that's practically unbreakable and untaintable. A bond that will soon be ready, and fight together to make the world a better place.

A bond that will the world's Future Hope..

[ko-chan-the-blueberry-donut]

Everyone Loves Hermione Chapter 3

Finally! The chapter with our favorite redhead and the beginning of romione bromance!

Also, I don’t know if the Wizarding World has television or Radio but here they do not. Additionally, headcanon Hermione loves rock and pop music you can’t change my mind.

Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter

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Chapter Three:

Ron hurried along with his large family as they hastily made their way towards Platform 9 3/4 . Fred and George were, as usual, messing with him. Ron felt his temper flare up, but he knew his brothers would find a way to make it so their mom would reprimand him instead if he snapped so he kept quiet.

“Don’t worry Ronnikins! We’ll keep you safe for your first year!” Fred chirped.

“For a fee of course! Let’s say, be our test subject for pranks?” George followed just as cheery. Ron wanted to bite them.

“No thanks.” He mumbled. He felt Scabbers move around in his pocket, squeaking. He felt so embarrassed that he was given a hand-me-down pet while everyone else he was sure would have new animals for their first year. Not to mention, his wand was also a hand-me-down as well. Would people like him? Would he be able to make friends?

He was nervous as hell to say the least.

“Oh come on! Just let us use you for some teeny tricks! It won’t be embarrassing!” George tried to trick him.

“I said no!” Ron snapped loudly. Fred and George grinned, knowing they could get him now.

“Now now, Ronnie! That’s no way to talk to your brothers!” Fred scolded gleefully.

“We’ll be sure to tell Mum!” George warned playfully. The Weasley matriarch wasn’t paying attention—too busy conversing with her other children to hurry along. Ron’s face turned pale. Any smart Weasley knew to be afraid of their mother’s scolding.

However, before the two of them could scamper off, Ron felt someone loop their arm through his. He turned his face and was engulfed by bushy brown hair. He coughed a bit, and moved some of the voluminous hair, showing a girl with a stern glare that could easily rival his mother’s.

“Leave him alone, you bullies!” the girl snarled at his older brothers. They appeared to be shocked that someone so tiny was telling them off. Even at times their mother would not be so harsh these days due to knowing they wouldn’t listen no matter what she said. However, Fred and George composed themselves.

“Don’t worry, little mouse. We’re just having some fun.” George told her, grinning. Fred also grinned.

“He’s our brother after all.” Fred added. The girl’s eyes narrowed even farther, and Ron thought her brown eyes became molten amber with their intensity.

“Well, you’re upsetting him! So guess what? He’s my brother now. I adopted him. Good day!” the girl firmly said, dragging Ron with her as they separated from his family and hurried into the Platform, neither taking note of Fred and George’s stunned looks or Mrs. Weasley chatting with a black-haired boy. Ron just blinked in confusion. What just happened?

The girl huffed angrily, pushing some of her hair out of her face. Ron spit some of her hair out when it got caught in his mouth. She seemed to have realized what she had done and let him go, blushing in awkwardness.

“Sorry, you probably wanted to say goodbye to your mum. It’s just I hate people being bullied…” the girl told him shyly. Ron just continue to blink. This was the first time someone came to his rescue, and he didn’t know how to handle it. Not to mention, she wanted to be his sister. All his siblings often expressed annoyance at being related to him. He wasn’t used to it…

“Erm it’s okay. Are you really going to adopt me?” Ron asked in awe. She seemed nice. He always wanted a nice sibling that openly cared about him. The girl grinned at his question.

“I don’t mind! I’ve never had siblings!” Ron sighed in relief. It would be just the two of them then. He could deal with just one sister. “What do siblings do?”

“They usually annoy each other, but I say since we don’t like bullies, we should be nicer to each other.” Ron answered, giving it some serious thought. The girl beamed.

“Okay! So if we ever get into fights, we have to remember to be nicer than your other siblings are to you.” The girl agreed. It was a simple conversation, as if they weren’t speaking about something huge like adopting and disowning, but Ron and the girl didn’t think of it that way. Ron felt as if he finally had a friend.

“I’m Ron Weasley. What is your name?” Ron introduced himself, beginning to push his cart along. She fell into step with him perfectly.

“I’m Hermione Granger! I promise I’ll be the best sister ever!” Hermione hugged him tightly, and Ron squirmed.

“Not in public! We gotta be the cool siblings!” Ron protested, blushing, and Hermione released him quickly, sheepish.

“Sorry! You’re right! We’ll hug in private!” Hermione agreed. They boarded the train, immediately setting forth on finding a compartment quickly. Luckily, they found one in the back of the train, and settled down quickly. They surveyed each other curiously. “So when is your birthday?” she began.

“March 1st. I was born in 1980.” Ron answered. Hermione gave a squeal of delight, clapping her hands together.

“Mine’s September 19th! I was born in 1979! That means I’m your older sister!” Hermione was thrilled while Ron groaned in dismay.

“Don’t go babying me now, Hermione.” Ron begged. He couldn’t take more older siblings. Hermione laughed.

“Don’t worry. I won’t baby you—much.” She grinned. Ron gave another groan. Hermione patted his shoulder reassuringly. “You can baby me too, okay?”

“Alright. That’s fine I guess…” Ron let it go. Scabbers squirmed in his pocket again and Hermione’s bag gave out a hiss. Hermione paled.

“Errr you don’t happen to have a rat or toad, do you?” she asked tentatively, trying to shush the bag. Ron blinked.

“I have a hand-me-down rat, yeah. Why?” he answered. Hermione looked nervous.

“Can you put him in a cage? It’s just… err… I’ll show you in a sec.” she explained vaguely. Ron listened and put Scabbers in his cage. Hermione sighed in relief and drew the flap off her bag, revealing a huge cat. Ron did a double take.

“What the bloody hell, Hermione?” Ron gaped. Hermione frowned.

“Is this gonna be a problem?” she asked, hoping it wasn’t. Ron was her first friend for Hogwarts and he even agreed to be her brother! Ron shook his head, still eyeing the fluffy cat.

“No, we’ll just have to keep Scabbers and it away from each other.” Ron reassured her. Hermione sighed in relief.

“His name is Crookshanks. Apparently, he’s half Kneazle.” Hermione said as she lifted Crookshanks from her bag and allowed the massive cat to lay on her lap. The cat purred in pleasure.

“Apparently?” Ron parroted.

“Yeah… I didn’t really listen much to the salesperson. He was yelling at him and threatening to hit him.” Hermione explained.

“Oh so you just bought him?” Ron asked. Hermione looked embarrassed.

“Errr more like I stole him…” Hermione murmured. Ron stared for a few moments before bursting out into laughter. Hermione’s face flushed deeply. “Stop laughing! It’s not funny!”

“It is! W-what did you do? Hide him in your bag and hope the shopkeeper wouldn’t notice a small girl carrying a huge lump in her bag?” Ron was laughing hysterically, just imagining small Hermione lugging around a hissing bag. Hermione averted her eyes.

“Errr he hid in someone else’s bag actually. I had to kidnap them to get him back…” she confessed quietly, and Ron laughed harder.

“Oh man! You’re worse than Fred and George! I’m going to have my hands full with you as a sister!” Ron exclaimed in glee.

“I’m not usually one to break the rules…” Hermione argued weakly. Ron just grinned, ruffling her bushy hair. “Hey!” Hermione cried, swatting his hand away. Ron chuckled.

“Don’t worry. I’ll be your accomplice next time, okay? Siblings stick together, right?” Ron smirked. Hermione giggled.

“Yes. Yes they do. Or at least, we will.” Hermione agreed with his statement. The train began to move, and the two of them gasped in excitement. They were really going to Hogwarts, and they really were going to go together. To have someone that had their back was like a dream come true!

The soon began swapping information about their backgrounds, and their lives before each other. Hermione found out Ron was the sixth child in a family of seven children, and that usually caused him to be forgotten about or get stuck with hand-me-downs. Hermione sat right next to him and gave him a giant hug to comfort him, explaining that she was an only child, and often got bullied herself for being very bookish and not a pretty girl like some of her former classmates. Ron told her it was okay because he was her brother now and she didn’t need to be pretty to get friends—she was nice and helped him so he was sure others would see she was nice too. Soon, the conversation turned to their magical backgrounds, both curious about the other’s.

“So you are from a pureblood family?” Hermione asked. Ron nodded.

“Yeah, but don’t worry! We’re not like those other snobby purebloods. My dad loves muggles. He finds them fascinating.”

“So… that means you have never grew up with movies or music?” Hermione asked flabbergasted. Ron pondered that. He never realized that was weird.

“Well, I’ve listened to music, but in the Wizarding World it’s more instrumental. Not really a lot of genres or places to play besides pubs or big parties or weddings. And I don’t even know what movies are…” Ron answered, feeling nervous that Hermione would make fun of him.

“Just don’t tell that to my dad. He’ll make you watch Star Wars, Jaws, E.T.—I could go on really—for hours! I love those movies, but he marathons them like crazy! He’s constantly calling me young padawan!” Hermione groaned, thinking about her nerdy father constantly sneaking up on her singing the Jaws theme.

“Are movies bad?” Ron asked curious.

“Oh no! Movies are wonderful! My favorite is the first Indiana Jones movie! I love adventure movies!” Hermione told him. “They’re moving pictures with stories and characters! It’s like watching a visual book in a sense.”

“Oh! That sounds like wizarding photos! They move too!” Ron responded, glad he had a clue what movies were now.

“Really? Pictures move?” Hermione was ecstatic at the discovery. More knowledge was wonderful in her book any time.

“Yeah. Yours don’t?” Ron blinked. Hermione shook her head.

“No. They’re still pictures.” Hermione replied. Here Ron was amazed.

“Wow, that’s so weird!” he commented. He noticed Hermione digging into her bag. “Whatcha doing, Hermione?”

“I’m kinda curious.” Hermione said, bringing out a strange contraption. “This is a boombox, by the way.” She added, gesturing to the strange, small object.

“What does it do? Does this play movies?” Ron was intrigued. Hermione giggled, shaking her head.

“Oh no, that’s television! This plays music!” she brought out some shiny disks. “Since we’re siblings it’s crucial you too are obsessed with music.” Hermione told him, popping the boombox open and placing a disk in. She pressed some buttons and soon, sounds were playing out of the boombox. Ron was amazed.

“We usually just enchant instruments to play music! Is this enchanted too?” Ron felt his body vibrate gleefully in the music. “What’s this song?”

“It’s powered by batteries. My parents stocked me up with tons so we should be fine for a while.” Hermione explained. Ron didn’t know what batteries were but found he didn’t care, his foot tapping to the catchy beat. Hermione grinned. “This, my dear brother, is the King of Pop, Michael Jackson. Fair warning, my parents love him and so do I. This is his song Thriller.”

“I like it.” Ron was bobbing his head to the beat. He was already enjoying Hermione as his new sister. He had no idea who Michael Jackson was or what pop was, but his song was extremely catchy.

“There’s actually a dance to it too.” Hermione said. Ron continued bobbing his head and tapping his foot.

It wasn’t long before Ron and Hermione were singing together, bobbing their heads to the music. Ron didn’t remember the last time he had so much fun. He could definitely do this for the next seven years, and even the rest of his life. Hermione and him would definitely be the best siblings!

“Ron! What is that racket?” Of course, his family had to come ruin the fun in the form of forever-buzz-killer Percy Weasley. Hermione squeaked, embarrassed at getting caught doing something bad. Ron groaned. ”As a newly appointed prefect, I order you to turn off that infernal music at once!”

“Yessir!” Hermione yelped out, turning off her boombox quickly. Ron glared at his older brother. He wouldn’t let him bully his new sister Hermione, who had showed more consideration to him than his other siblings.

“Lay off, Percy! It’s just music.” Ron retorted. Percy gaped at his brother talking back to him before his face turned red.

“If I hear it again, I’m confiscating the object. Is that clear?” Percy tried to intimidate them, and Hermione nodded. Ron looked like he was about to protest, but Hermione shushed him. Percy left, satisfied he had the last word. Ron glared at Hermione.

“Why did you let him bully you? I could’ve handled it.” Ron asked annoyed. Hermione averted her eyes.

“I saw him with your family earlier, so I didn’t want you to get in trouble with your parents. Confiscating my boombox, fine, but I didn’t want him to get you in trouble at school and at home.” Hermione confessed. Then a flash of anger appeared in her eyes. “Also, I wanted him to leave quickly before I got expelled for kicking him in the nads.”

“Pfft” the thought of tiny Hermione kicking his tall brother in the nads was hilarious, and Ron felt his anger wash away. Knowing she did that to have his back was very comforting. He promised himself to always have her back too.

“Erm hello…” a shy voice said. The two of them turned to see a boy twiddling his fingers. He gulped when he saw he had their attention. “I’ve lost my toad Trevor. Have you guys seen him?” he asked timidly. Ron and Hermione shook their heads. The boy sighed in dismay.

“That’s probably a good thing, mate. Crookshanks likes hunting toads.” Ron told the boy. The boy blinked.

“Crookshanks?” he repeated. Hermione held up the giant fluffy cat, who hissed at the boy. The boy squeaked, flinching backwards. Hermione shushed Crookshanks and pet him to placate him.

“Sorry. He’s very selective. I’m surprised Ron and him are fine.”

“Because I’m a good brother for you.” Ron puffed his chest with pride. The boy blinked.

“Oh, you guys are siblings?” he asked. They didn’t look anything alike, but he was scared they would yell at him if he said that.

“I adopted him today.” Hermione grinned. The boy was even more confused but decided not to comment. “Anyway, you’re looking for a toad, right? We’ll help!”

“Y-You will?” the timid boy asked in disbelief. No one has ever offered to help him. Her words made him feel all warm and fuzzy. Hermione’s smile only served to farther launch him into Cloud 9.

“Yeah! C’mon Ron! Let’s go help…” Hermione trailed off, not knowing the boy’s name.

“N-Neville! I’m Neville Longbottom!” the boy introduced, his cheeks flushing red.

“Neville then. I’m Hermione and this is Ron. Let’s go then.” Hermione said. Crookshanks made to follow his human but Hermione stopped him. “No, Crookshanks! You’ll only eat Trevor. Stay here.” Crookshanks meowed in displeasure before staying in the seat. Satisfied, Hermione, Ron, and Neville left the compartment. Crookshanks watched his human go, not happy. He huffed, deciding to follow and left the compartment in search of her.

However, a familiar scent caught his nose and he made way towards it. Seeing the recognizable bag, Crookshanks shimmied into it smoothly.

Hearing his bag meow, Draco undid the flap and found a familiar whiskered face looking up at him. Crookshanks meowed innocently while Draco sighed annoyed.

“This better not be a regular thing, you cretin.” Draco said without any malice. He rose up from his seat and bid farewell to Crabbe and Goyle. “I’ll be right back. My friend lost her beast of a cat again.” A fond smile bloomed on Draco’s face at the mention of Hermione. At least now he had an excuse to seek her out. Crabbe and Goyle waved him farewell and Draco set off to go find Hermione.

------

“Okay, thank you.” Hermione said to a group of older students, shutting their compartment door with a sigh. She turned to her two comrades and shook her head in disappointment. “They didn’t see him either.”

“I hope he’s okay!” Neville was beginning to panic. “My Gran will kill me if I already lost him! She’s always yelling at me for forgetting things.”

“Don’t worry. He’s around here somewhere.” Hermione patted his shoulder in comfort and the boy stared at her in wonder, blushing brightly. Ron watched Neville suspiciously. He saw how nervous he got around Hermione, and he wondered what was his deal. He was staring at Hermione like she was a princess or something.

“Y-You’re right, Hermione! I just gotta have faith!” Neville was encouraged by her words, and they continued down the line, knocking on another compartment door. Hermione opened it, opening her mouth to apologize for the interruption, before recognizing the familiar boy sitting in the compartment all by himself.

“Harry?”

Harry Potter looked up at the familiar voice and he was face to face with his angel, Hermione Granger. Happiness flooded Harry, and he couldn’t help but give a shout in excitement, springing up from his seat and rushing towards her. Hermione squeaked as Harry embraced her tightly, and Harry took in her faint vanilla scent.

He couldn’t believe he was seeing his angel again! It was a dream come true! He had asked Hagrid to let him go to the zoo she volunteered at to try and find her before he left for Hogwarts, but then he found out she unexpectedly quit. The discovery crushed Harry, and he was saddened when he thought he would never see Hermione again, but fate must have been smiling at him for once because Hermione was here, with him, as she should be.

“It’s nice to see you too, Harry.” Hermione giggled, separating from him. Ron noticed Harry looked like he wanted to snatch her up again, and the redhead boy watched him warily. Like Neville, he too was weird to Ron. “Have you happened to see a toad around? Neville’s lost his.”

Here Harry finally noticed the two boys with his angel and a frown came upon his features. What was his angel doing with unfamiliar boys? He stepped closer to Hermione, scrutinizing them. Ron and Neville gave responding frowns. Neville because he felt Harry was too close to Hermione and Ron because this is the second boy who is being a weirdo.

“No. I haven’t. Sorry.” Harry shook his head, turning his attention back to Hermione. “Do you want to sit here with me, Hermione? We could catch up.” Harry gave her a boyish, shy smile. Ron and Neville noticed Harry only asked Hermione.

“I’m sorry, Harry. We really should be looking for Neville’s toad. Thank you though.” Hermione didn’t notice anything. She remained oblivious as Ron watched Neville give Harry a smirk of victory. Ron blinked. Was this the same mousy boy they were walking around with? He saw Harry narrow his emerald eyes in challenge.

“I’ll go with you, Hermione. Being in here by myself is boring anyway.” Harry said, following them out of the compartment. Hermione gave him a grateful smile.

“Oh, Harry, that’s so sweet of you!” Harry blushed at her praise. Ron continued to wonder if the two boys with him were mental while he watched Neville now frown. He stepped closer to Hermione, having the urge to back away slowly and have them run for cover.

The four of them made their way along the train before a meow sounded and Hermione blinked as a familiar blonde-haired boy held up Crookshanks to her face.

“I believe this is yours, Hermione.” Draco grinned in greeting. Hermione laughed, amused, eyeing Crookshanks. She took him into her arms and the fluff purred happily.

“Oh, you’re so naughty Crookshanks I swear!” Hermione cooed as all the boys watched her. Draco, Neville, and Harry were watching her with adoration and Ron was seriously calculating the odds of their luck encountering three mental boys. He wasn’t good at math, but he was sure the odds shouldn’t have been this great.

“Who are you?” Harry demanded the blonde-haired boy who was talking with Hermione familiarly.

“I’m Draco, Hermione’s friend. Who are you?” Draco glared back. Ron grasped Hermione’s clothes as she was none the wiser, still cooing at Crookshanks.

“I’m Harry. I’m also Hermione’s friend.” Harry retorted. Neville gave them both a glare.

“Well, I’m Hermione’s friend too!”

Ron watched the scene with caution. He tugged Hermione again, and she glanced at him curiously. He gestured for her to leave with him and she beamed, clutching his hand and they retreated away, Ron’s thoughts running wild.

‘Those guys are mental. Why were they all hung up on Hermione?’ Ron wondered. She was an awesome sister, so maybe they wanted her for a sister too? A frown came on his face. Too bad—she was his sister first! ‘No wait, that isn’t right. They were looking at her like Mum and Dad look at each other—oh no.’

Ron’s face paled as realization came to him. He groaned out loud, drawing Hermione’s attention.

“What’s wrong, Ron?” Hermione was curious. Ron turned and placed his hands on her shoulders.

‘Wasn’t boys liking her supposed to come way later?!’ Ron groaned again before speaking.

“Hermione, when we get to Hogwarts, I’m teaching you how to throw a right hook.” Ron said seriously.

“Why’s that?” Hermione blinked.

“Because if any more of our classmates are anything like those three, we’re surrounded by mental people.”

--------------------

Here was chapter three! If only Ron knew how mental everyone will be.

[toldnews-blog]

New Post has been published on https://toldnews.com/technology/entertainment/watch-rebel-wilson-on-why-her-role-in-isnt-it-romantic-is-important-to-her/

WATCH: Rebel Wilson on why her role in 'Isn't It Romantic' is important to her

Transcript for Rebel Wilson on why her role in ‘Isn’t It Romantic’ is important to her

stealer in comedies like “Bridesmaids” and the “Pitch perfect” movies. Now she’s starring in “Isn’t it romantic” as a woman trapped in a romantic comedy who can’t get used to hunky men finding her irresistible. I know how she feels. Take a look. I hit my head really hard and I woke up in this alternate universe. Okay. And things are supposed to be better but it’s actually worse because people are treating me like I’m special. Yeah. And I’m not special. Still waters run deepest, don’t they. What? God, there’s so much more I want to know about you. No, no, see, you’re not understanding. This isn’t the real world. This is like the matrix for lonely women. Please welcome the lovely and talented rebel Wilson. ??? I’m always uncoordinated on these high stools. They’re not that comfortable. Someone told me that you go to a lot of sporting events in la la land. Because I’m still single, joy. There’s a lot of men at those. That’s true. Go where the men are. I find that I embarrass myself a bit though because — oh yeah, here I am. That’s such a good idea. Yeah. But I actually was very sporty as a kid. I played tennis and basketball. So I love going to all the games and it’s really exciting, but then you can definitely tell I’m Australian because I’m not cool like other celebrities. Other actors are like, oh, there’s Lebron, you what’s up? Me, I’m like — I’m joining in the huddle, you know, telling the coach something. I’m just — yeah, very Australian and embarrassing but I can’t help it. It’s exciting. I’m American and embarrassing at sporting events if it makes you feel any better. But your new movie, “Isn’t it romantic,” is clever because it takes every cliche in romantic comedy and turns it on its head. Can you tell us about it? Why I liked it is because it’s a romantic comedy but it’s also an anti-romantic comedy if you’re like, they’re so stupid. Also, if you love those movies like Bridget Jones diary and my best friend’s wedding. It’s like an homage to it. I loved it. I saw it with my husband and we were like, there goes one, there goes one, and you can see pieces of them. There’s like 100 references to them. At least. I used to hate romantic is going to end up with the guy. I had to watch like 65 romantic comedies in a row as research. Then I start crying like, oh, my god, these are the best movies ever. I really got into it. What I loved about it too is you don’t see that many plus-sized leads in these comedies. You see the Sandra Bullocks and all that. You have such confidence and you say actually that being a plus-size lead mes you even more powerful in Hollywood, it’s been an advantage for you. It’s interesting, the average American women is a size 16 to 18 which is my exact size. I’m also the exact height of the average American woman. And 70% of women are considered plus size in America. Yes. Which is the huge majority. Yet, in films, less than 1% star a plus sized lead. Particularly when it comes to romantic roles there’s not a lot that I get to star in the film and this is the first movie I’ve produced as well so I’m proud of the message. Congratulations. You’re on a roll, kid. So two of your co-stars in the movie just got married, Liam Hemsworth — So cute. To Miley Cyrus, priyanka Chopra to Nick Jonas. Love is in the air with this movie. My two lead co-stars tied the knot. Fun fact, Nick and priyanka’s first date was to come and see me perform at the Hollywood bowl. Oh wow. That’s nice. Yeah. So I’m hooking up other people, just not yet myself. Well, you’re currently filming a movie version of the musical “Cats”. Hm-mm. With a-listers like Taylor Swift and Idris Elba, who I love. Everyone knows that. She gushes. Really, it’s embarrassing. In her marriage, she gets a pass. Why wouldn’t you? Why wouldn’t you? But this is what I hear. One of the requirements is that you have to go to cat school. Yes. What exactly is that? Is Idris in cat school with you, and are we going to see cat moves? Because we’re all cats in the movie, it’s based on the Broadway music so we have to learn how to move as cats because it’s all about real bodies in the film. So you walk around like this. There’s a lot of shoulder action and you’ve got to pretend that the ears are on top of your head so you’re doing these moves and going — and like, no joke, you have to kind of sniff other people’s bums sometimes. Kind of like — That’s what cats do and they put us through this full training of how to move and think like a cat. It’s ironic because growing up you were a dog shower. Yes. And a junior dog handler. I love this. Look how cute you are. That’s me. What was it like doing that? I was very dorky. But my mom is a big international dog show judge now. Really? Yeah. She’s progressed from being a do shower. Going with cats is like changing allegiances but I think they’re going to love it. They get along. Yeah. The musical is amazing so I can’t wait to see the movie. I’ve got a big year. I’ve got four movies coming out this year and two of them I’ve produced myself. Good for you. Before we go though, in honor of “Isn’t it romantic” we wanted to do a round of rapid fire questions with you, Valentine’s day edition. Are you ready? Yeah, okay. First kiss? It was with a visiting rugby player from Indiana. Celebrity crush. Idris Elba. Yes! Favorite song to make out to? I’m going to say boyz II men, “I’ll make love to you”. Nice. Ideal date? Going to the movies, definitely. Best thing to do on Valentine’s day. I agree. Biggest turnoff? Smoking. Taking a dip in the lady pond? No. Not officially. I would. Ever ghosted someone? No. I’m not about that. Ever send nudes? No. Do you believe in love at first sight? I do but it hasn’t happened for me yet. I like that. Well, my dear, you are on a roll in your career and we wish you all the best. Thank you. Our thanks to rebel Wilson. “Isn’t it romantic” is in theaters today. We’ll be right back.

This transcript has been automatically generated and may not be 100% accurate.

[hanakospiritofthetoliet]

Dad Reflexes (Soldier 76 x Reader)

Dad Reflexes (Soldier 76 x Reader) Jack was fast, you know that, hell, everyone knew that. Either due to his training, his Indiana farm roots, or the chemicals they managed to pump into him, Jack was quick on his feet with a body that wouldn't quit. Despite this, the poor man was tormented for these skills with the most embarrassing of labels; dad reflexes. Jack would always deny that he was a dad by nature though he let it slip out once in a while around Lúcio or Hana. After all the denial though, you knew Jack really did care for his fellow agents including you, just a simple support. It even got to the point where it seemed he cared about you in a deeper way and you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel those feelings as well. It was these thoughts that were swirling in your mind as you were currently cleaning your utensils, getting ready for your next patient but the slam of the door made you jump. Turning around instantly, you spotted the man on your mind, arm around his middle, getting a bit of blood on the floor.

"Ja-ack?" you stuttered, getting over your spooked moment, "How are you?" "I'm fine," Jack sighed as he took a seat, taking off his visor and relaxing a little as you moved his arm to reveal a big of a big wound on his stomach, "Just a small wound."

"Tsk, tsk," you scolded, knowing it wasn't just a small wound but you've seen this too many times from him that it practically numbed you, "Always getting hurt."

Turning your heal to get some bandages as well as the utensils for stitches, your ditzy mind forgot about the blood on the floor as you stepped in one of the small puddles and lost traction. "SHIIII-"

Anticipating your crash to the floor, you felt yourself stopped before that happened, looking up to see that Jack stopped you in the nick of time. "Jack-k? I'm-m sorry," you start to apologize though you couldn't help but like the moment, your cheeks turning rosy red.

"Don't worry about it, kiddo," Jack hummed, giving you a week smile as a similar shade lined his face before he grunted deeply, his quick action and pressure on his gut agitating his wound, "(y-y/n)?"

"Yes?" you looked blankly before you realized, biting your lip as you got out of his arms, "Oh, sorry!"

Despite the blunder, you managed to fix up the super soldier without any other incident. Jack was quiet during that time, looking lost in thought as he bit his lip for a moment before you snapped him out of it.

"Jack?" you snapped your fingers in front of him.

"Dinner?" Jack asked, looking a little confused before he managed to collect his thoughts, "I'm sorry... would you like to have dinner with me?"

"I- sure," you answered, rather flustered now, "But only after your wound heals."

"Deal," Jack chuckled, willing to endure so he could have a decent time with you that didn't involve him getting hurt... yet.

~~~~~

But you decided to take fate into your own hands, well for the most part. It seemed you got into more accidents with Jack right around the corner, always there to save you like some clumsy protective knight. Yet the man was no fool, seeing that these tri[s and slips seemed more on purpose than accident now. But he guessed that's what falling in love was all about, dad joke intended. And speaking of dad, he was soon going to be one after years of flirting, dating, and finally getting married to you, part of the American dream he was lucky to have and now he was getting another piece to that dream as he was taking a walk with you, well it was more like hovering over you, back to your room, laundry in hand.

"Jack, I'm alright," you mumbled as you bit your lip, a hand on your bulging middle as you tried to calm the bouncing child inside as you carried the basket with your free arm.

"You can't be too careful," Jack mumbled, trying not to sound worried but he totally was, "You're carrying precious cargo."

"I know I am," you sighed, gently smiling at him, "Believe me, I know."

"And a man has to protect his girl," Jack stated proudly, returning the smile. A perfectly placed kick from your unborn child managed to hit the basket, kicking a sock out and with your clumsy curse, you managed to step on it and lose traction.

"AHHH-" You were ready to fall, trying to move onto your back to protect your kid when you stopped suddenly, clothes all over the floor as you looked up, seeing that Jack managed to catch you in the nick of time. He managed to shuffle into a squat, one hand on your upper back, the other on your lower back.

"And I guess he has to protect his child too?" you couldn't help but chuckle, heart racing as you tried to calm it down as not to stress the baby

. "Especially from their klutz of a mother," he mused though his voiced seemed a little strained. "Jaaaaack," you whined, playing the emotionally sensitive card a little too much, especially with his teasing.

"But I still love you," he mused, kissing your cheek as he would always love his girl, no matter what.

"Oh, Jack, that's so-" You were cut short as you noticed Jack whimper a little, furrowing your brow as he was straining to keep you the way you were now, tremors shooting from his tense muscles to your bloated body.

"M-my kn-nee-es," he barely managed to grumble before he laid you down rather quickly, only to fall onto his side and rub the pained area. At least you weren't alone on the floor anymore, giggling as you figured you could enjoy your time here as you pecked his cheek to help ease his pain. Especially since it would take forever to get you back up on your feet again. At least the laundry was warm...

~~~~~

"I've got you in my sights," Jack mumbled in his serious commander voice as he was watching his daughter, (d/n) dancing around in a silly pink tutu, trying to show her dad what she learned in daycare. Despite Jack's hard demeanor, he was proud of his little girl, seeing her grow up was making the old man soft and even giving him some hope in the world, especially when it gave him you and you gave him this little angel. (d/n) had her father's blue eyes though sharper as compared to his weathered eyes and she was rather stubborn as well, especially during naptime. She got her nice (h/c) locks and beautiful looks and you hoped- no you prayed that she didn't get your curse; your clumsiness.

"Oh please, she's just fine," You retorted in a hushed tone, curled up nest to your husband, watching the little show as you bit your lip, worried as you wonder even your curse would strike your child.

"I can't help it," he snickered, sensing your fear as he kissed your lips for a brief moment, "It's my dad sense."

"Well dad sense or not, our kid is gonna be alright," you scoffed, knowing he'd always pull out the dad jokes card whenever he liked. Out of the corner of your eye though, you spotted that (d/n) managed to stumble over her wonky steps and was about to fall, potentially hurting that darling face or head. You knew what you had to do as you prevented her hit to the carpet, swooping her up into you arms with lighting quick reflexes.

"Are you alright, sweetie?" you asked her as you pecked her temple, worry deep in your (e/c) orbs.

"Again! Again!" the tot squealed, smiling wide as she bounced up and down in your arms.

"Only if your dad reflexes can catch up," you chided, looking over your shoulder at him with a wide smirk on your face.

Jack got up, slowly clapping for you as he lightly nuzzled your cheek with his scruff. "You gave her your clumsiness in the first place."

"Hehehe," you laughed before you handed (d/n) off to Jack, mumbling into his ear, "I guess that's not more 'dirty dancing' for the rest of the week."

Jack was a blushing mess now as he looked at his daughter, hoping she didn't hear that but a child's ears are always open and absorb everything. His pulse quickened and blood got cold when his fears came true.

"What's dirty dancing, daddy?" asked (d/n), too innocent and pure for this world questioning about the worse thing she could ask at such an age.

Queue Jack stumbling through an B-Sed answer of seeds and a farmer, red in the face and hoping this quick skills could get him out this situation... hopefully.

[sharkchunks]

The Nuking of the Fridge

13 moments that utterly destroyed franchises, or foretold their doom:

(SPOILERS)

13- The Lost World: Jurassic Park

The Jurassic Park franchise ground to a halt along with the screeching brakes of a subway train. For some reason, Spielberg thought it would be a good idea to cut from a woman screaming at the sight of her daughter being attacked by small dinosaurs to Ian Malcolm yawning with a horrible screeching noise, in front of a poster that made it look briefly like he was present on the island. This inexplicable nonsense was jarring enough to take viewers out of the film and never let them back in.

12- Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones

For many, Jar Jar Binks was the downfall of the franchise. For others, it was the midichlorians. For me, it was all fine until The Force Awakens. But one moment stands out as the low point in the entire franchise and although Star Wars lasted for some time after that with peaks and valleys, there was no valley lower than C3P0′s head being dragged behind R2D2 and saying, “What a drag.” C3P0 had become the Jar Jar of Episode II, if not worse. In the middle of an epic battle sequence that was at the top of Star Wars form, we got the worst pun ever.

11- Star Trek Into Darkness

Like Episode II, Into Darkness ranks lower in the standings that it might for some fans because of the place it takes in the series. For Episode II, it’s low on the list because the series survived for some time after, and had already alienated many. For Into Darkness, there are two factors: First, it’s not part of Star Trek, it’s part of Abrams Trek, a follow up homage to Star Trek, which jumped many sharks but never did fully nuke the fridge before it ended with Star Trek: Insurrection. Similarly, Star Trek Beyond marked an upturn rather than a lingering in the depths. Still, the inverted Khan howl was a very nukely moment.

10- Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Can a series nuke the fridge when it began and continued from the start at fridge nuking quality? If it’s possible, Transformers did it with the addition of two pendulous wrecking balls for one of the large piles of metal it called Transformers. Were it a better franchise this might rank higher, but the vulgarity was at least somewhat mitigated by John Turturro’s commentary. Mileage may vary, for many that’s the worst part.

9- Batman and Robin

This is probably too low for Batman fans, but the nipples themselves were merely the overture at the start of an ongoing insult. The Batman films had already taken a huge step down after Burton’s departure and Schumacher’s finale was surely one of the worst disasters in modern cinema, but it was really the entire film that manifested as the disaster rather than a single fridge nuking moment. Of course, if an entire movie can be such a thing, this would be one of the top contenders.

8- The Legend of Zorro

The Mask of Zorro had such potential. It’s a great movie, one of the best of its kind. Its sequel was a mess in every way, but there was one moment that killed the franchise completely. Zorro rides his horse onto a train and that’s fine. But as the train turns, the horse looks ahead, and its eyes grow like a cartoon. The movie is not a cartoon. But the horse’s eyes are. This is beyond an Austin Powers moment. No more Zorro movies were made.

7- Lady in the Water

M. Night Shyamalan is not exactly a franchise but he was on course with his first two major releases to being the next Hitchcock, or something completely new. With his second set of two, he declined severely but there was still hope. Lady in the Water ended that hope and delivered us into the realm of The Happening and the Last Airbender. It’s finale was an embarrassment that proved Shyamalan was incapable of lightening up. He took it all so seriously it became a joke. He doesn’t seem to show any signs of learning.

6- The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies

Another instance of a slow burn that exploded, The Lord of the Rings films were great. The first two Hobbits were okay. The third Hobbit was pretty bad but once Legolas jumped from falling rock to falling rock in a display that would feel fake in an episode of Scooby-Doo, it was over. What had started as one of the great franchises in film, taken from one of the great franchises in literature, had become the worst imaginable disaster. Or at least the 6th worst.

5- Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice

DC was riding high with Nolan’s Batman series. It had hope with Snyder’s Man of Steel. But in abandoning Nolan’s knight and casting Ben Affleck, DC showed its new face. It was bad. The whole movie was just awful. But it wasn’t until the great promised rivalry between Batman and Superman ended because their mothers happened to have the same name that it became one of the most disgusting cop-outs in cinema, and secured DC’s future in a hell of bad movies.

4- Alien 3

Alien 3 and Resurrection have some neat stuff but they’re nowhere near on par with the first two by any stretch of the imagination. Really, they didn’t have any chance to be, plagued with an uncaring studio and an impossible mission- To follow Aliens. How to follow such an epic is unknown, but we know for certain that killing everyone’s favorite new characters form the last movie is not it. The rest of the movie killed the quality of the franchise by going average ala Jurassic Park 3, but it was the deaths of Newt and Hicks that killed any chance it had of being accepted.

3- Die Another Day

Bond had a great resurgence with Goldeneye and Tomorrow Never Dies. The World is Not Enough wasn’t too bad. But the cartoon that was Brosnan’s 4th film as the character was so bad it killed a 20 film franchise that had to be unplugged and rebooted. The centerpiece to it all was the cartoon glacier surfing scene, which saw many a face meeting many a palm in theaters. There’s not much else to say. 20 films led up to that.

2- Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines

This is where several audience members asked out loud when the real movie would begin. The Terminator was phenomenal. T2 was deuterophenomenal. It was all just phenomenal. And then this happened. The Terminator had become a joke, a cheap gag. Fanfiction and not in the good way. Everything about the film was an insult, from turning “no fate” into “this is our fate” to the novelty glasses above, it wasn’t enough that the series die. It had to die horribly. Salvation failed to save it, and Genisys failed to reboot it, adding insult to injury. The rights are heading back to James Cameron however, and ironically if there’s any franchise that embodies hope for the future, it’s Terminator.

1- Do you have to ask?

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was to have been a dream come true for fans of the greatest action film of all time. Lucas was back, Spielberg was back, Ford and Allen were back. Hopes were high. So high. Then the CG rodent appeared and they were diminished. Then the fridge got nuked and all hope was gone. Then Shia LaBeouf began swinging through the trees and a new era in cinematic shame began. The masters had fallen. The franchises were all finally lost. The incident was so horrible that the film lexicon gained a new term. It had none before to encapsulate how much had gone wrong.

These are the nukings of the 13 fridges of modern moviedom. Each is a disaster, but together, from 1997 to 2017, they represent two decades that changed cinema forever. They were the dawn of the reboot, and the condemnation of the mainstream to playing things safe. Far too safe to do much good, and far too inept to correct its own mistakes:

Recovery is not guaranteed. We can hope, and we can fight for creative, high quality film and try to make something new, but the world is timid now and will not accept anything like that for some time to come.

Short of a miracle, I maintain that change will not come from within, but from somewhere new.

[the-connection]

close

Video

Rep. McCarthy: Terrifying to think of Pelosi becoming loudspeaker

Nancy Pelosi pledges to run for House speaker again if the Democrats win back the majority of members; current House Majority Leader Kevin McCarthy weighs in on 'Sunday Morning Futures.SSSS

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On the roster of experts: The GOP battle for the speakership heightens - I’ll Tell You What: This podcast is confidential - Obama returns to campaign trail with fiery discussion - Kavanaugh eschews Dem bunkers, evidence referendum tower - Seeing quintuple THE GOP BATTLE FOR THE SPEAKERSHIP INTENSIFIES Politico : “To listen to them tell it, Kevin McCarthy and Steve Scalise are buddy-buddy again. Forget about a possible showdown to lead the House Republican Conference: The only stuff the No. 2 and 3 House Republican care about is saving their majority, they insist. But behind the scenes, the struggle between the two men is as intense as ever, as the moment of supposing to ascertain who will supersede Paul Ryan gleans closer -- and the prospect of losing the House in the midterms changes. Scalise has been hectic raising his national sketch in ways that some McCarthy allies feel threatens the California Republican’s bid to lead the conference. In recent months, Scalise, the majority of members whip, has staked out several hard-line situations favored by reactionaries. His moves have put McCarthy in the embarrassing standing of having to follow Scalise or feelings the far-right, whose substantiate McCarthy needs to become speaker. Like McCarthy, Scalise has been barnstorming the two countries fostering money for lawmakers, chits that could be quite irreplaceable if there is an opening to lead the conference. Its term of office regularly brags his fundraising , noting that his totals have overshadowed any previous GOP whip. Scalise’s team doesn’t spell out that McCarthy previously held the number of jobs, but the sense is clear whom they’re likening him to. Scalise, who has backed McCarthy for orator this spring but is considering a offer if McCarthy precipitates short, recently hired a onetime political agent for ex-Speaker John Boehner to coordinate his safarus exertions. The Louisiana Republican will reputation Grant Saunders , Boehner's onetime deputy executive director, as his political conductor this week.” Is the duel even worth it? - Vanity Fair : “Ironically, if Scalise does manage to beat out McCarthy for the number of jobs, he was able to wind up in a worse place: the speakership is a notoriously abominable job--one that burned out both Ryan and his precede. The place has actually degraded under Donald Trump, whose stewardship has permanently polarized Congress, and who seems incapable of working in tandem with anyone in his own locker, much less anyone in Republican leadership. And of course, there’s the very real possible that Democrat will regain control of the House, eliminating Scalise’s dream job wholly. With that possibility looming in the distance, Scalise’s political machinations--which were allegedly disheartened McCarthy supporters--seem potentially mindless to G.O.P. agents, who would have preferred a brand-new Speaker sooner rather than subsequently.' Members won’t follow a lame duck, he’ll have no leveraging to trimmed treats, ’ a Republican groused to Axios back in April,' and the last stuff they need in this environment is six months of palace plot and everyone stabbing everyone else in the back.’ Regrettably for Republicans, it seems that’s exactly what they’ll get.” THE RULEBOOK: STILL TRUE TODAY “There is, perhaps , nothing most likely to disrupt the coolnes of nations than their being bound to reciprocal contributions for any common objective that does not furnish an equal and coincident benefit. For it is an observation, as genuine as it is trite, that there is nothing people differ so quickly about as the payment of money.”- Alexander Hamilton , Federalist No. 7 TIME OUT : b> THE MORE YOU KNOW New Yorker : “Katharine Briggs and Isabel Myers [ developed] the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, or MBTI,[ which] is the most popular personality test in the world. ... Merve Emre ’s' The Personality Brokers’( Doubleday) is the story of how the MBTI precipitated to dirt. It was a long descent. ... Emre’s book follows closely the report of the development of the MBTI given in Annie Murphy Paul ’s' The Cult of Personality Testing, ’ published in 2004( a direct that Emre surprisingly does not declare ). Both records describe Briggs and Myers as intellectually driven women in an era when occupation the possibility for intellectually driven women were slim. Neither one had any training in psychology or in psychiatry--or, for that are important, in testing--and neither ever wielded in a laboratory or an academic institute. A third wife, Mary McCaulley , who came upon the test in 1968, its first year Katharine vanished, was a prof of psychology at the University of Florida. She teamed up with Isabel, and was crucial in turning the MBTI into a professional functioning. But, essentially, the MBTI was home-cooked.” Flag on the play? - Email us at HALFTIMEREPORT @FOXNEWS. COM with your gratuities, commentaries or questions. I’LL TELL YOU WHAT: THIS PODCAST IS CONFIDENTIAL This week Dana Perino and Chris Stirewalt discuss Senator Cory Booker ’s struggled violation of Senate settles, the latest House upset in Massachusetts and find out what prediction Chris nailed this week. Plus, Dana accommodates the mailbag and Chris faces judicial trivia. LISTEN AND SUBSCRIBE HERE SCOREBOARD Trump job performance Average endorsement : b> 39.6 percent Average dissatisfaction : b> 55 percent Net Score: -1 5.4 points Change from one week ago: down 2 points [ Median includes: Grinnell College/ Selzer: 43% approve - 50% disapprove; Gallup: 41% approve - 53% veto; IBD: 36% approve - 56% veto; ABC News/ WaPo: 38% approve - 60% disapprove; USA Today/ Suffolk: 40% approve - 56% disapprove . i >] Control of House Republican average: 40.2 percent Democratic median: 49.4 percent Advantage: Democrat plus 9.2 points Change from one week ago: Democratic advantage up 0.4 points [ Average includes: Grinnell College/ Selzer: 45% Dems - 43% GOP; IBD: 50% Dems - 39% GOP; ABC/ WaPo: 52% Dems - 38% GOP; USA Today/ Suffolk: 50% Dems - 39% GOP; NBC/ WSJ: 50% Dems - 42% GOP .] OBAMA RETURNS TO CAMPAIGN TRAIL WITH FIERY SPEECH Fox News : “Former President Barack Obama propelled his return to the campaign trail Friday with a fiery speech alleging President Trump and the GOP of fueling' split and resentment’ -- but the convening chairman responded with a rhetorical yawn.' I'm sorry, I watched but I fell asleep, ’ Trump taunted, speaking at a political mobilize minutes later for GOP Senate candidate Kevin Cramer in North Dakota . ... The back-and-forth between the sitting and onetime chairmen placeds the stage for a battle of the mega-surrogates honcho into the November midterms. Trump has promised to ramp up his expedition illusions for GOP nominees and, with Obama flexing his political muscle once again, he will have a worthwhile opponent. Obama's campaign season debut launches his midterm effort to revival Democrat to the ballots and dissolve Republicans' grip on power in Congress. The former chairman advised Friday that the stakes are high and the consequences of climate remaining on the sidelines' dire.’ Delivering some of his toughest broadsides against the GOP since leaving office- and referring to Trump by mention, something he used to avoid- Obama said there are certain' strong and privileged’ people who want to' keep us angry.’” Pence goes on defense in three Senate hastens - Politico : “Vice President Mike Pence is going on the breeze in three Senate scoots -- not so much to pump up Republican nominees but to tear down Democratic incumbents. Pence rends Sens. Jon Tester of Montana, Heidi Heitkamp of North Dakota and Joe Donnelly of Indiana over a range of highly charged partisan issues, from opposition to the GOP tax bill and Obamacare repeal to support for sanctuary cities and Contrived Parenthood funding. With Republican facing headwinds going into the November midterms, the party is waging an intensive slash-and-burn expedition aimed at disqualifying Democratic candidates. The TV blots paint Tester, Heitkamp and Donnelly -- all of whom face the burden of flowing for reelection in states that President Donald Trump prevailed by doubled toes -- as greatly out of step with their constituencies.” California Dems Newsom, Feinstein drop to single-digit heads in latest referendum - Fox News : “Two of California's best-known Democrat are stealing in the tallies as the schedule boosts closer to Election Day. In detail, both Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom and U.S. Sen. Dianne Feinstein have just been single-digit causes over their opposings, research results evidence. In the hasten for bos, a Probolsky Research poll, conducted between Aug. 29 -Sept. 2, registers Newsom producing Republican businessman John Cox by a mere 5 points, with 17 percent of respondents undecided, the San Francisco Chronicle reported. Feinstein faces same troubles, with the tally indicating her with simply an 8-point advantage over progressive challenger Kevin de Leon . A one-quarter of the respondents told the pollsters they remain undetermined. Both Cox and de Leon have chipped their opponents' produces since the primaries in June. Newsom made 34 percent of the vote while Cox received 25 percent. In California's' jungle primary’ organisation, the two top finishers face off in the general elections held, regardless of party.” Sen. Carper defeats progressive challenger - CBS News : “A combat between Delaware's elderly senator and an upstart challenger journeying an antiestablishment waving within the Democratic Party spotlit the state's primary elections Thursday. Democratic Sen. Tom Carper , 71, hasn't lost a scoot in more than four decades in politics, including on Thursday. He successfully protected his tush against a primary objection from political stranger and society activist Kerri Evelyn Harris , 38. Carper won with 64 percent of the vote. Carper, who famously says he always campaigns as if he's 20 details behind, made no chances against Harris, an Air Force veteran trying to stage one of the most appalling disturbances in modern Delaware political history.” Poll evidences confined scoot for Georgia minister - AJC : “The hasten for Georgia governor couldn’t be closer simply two months before the election, as an Atlanta Journal-Constitution/ Channel 2 Action News poll demo Democrat Stacey Abrams and Republican Brian Kemp deadlocked at 45 percentage. The referendum of likely November voters registered the two competitives are fighting to win over a flake of the electorate: Simply 8 percent of survey respondents were undecided, and an additional 2 percent support Libertarian Ted Metz. The close mood of the race could be an indicator of the rage attaching behind Democrats trying to flip-flop the state’s top office for the first time since 2002, propelled by Abrams’ adopt of progressive issues such as her entreat to grows the nation’s first pitch-black dame elected governor.” Illinois Rep. Mike Quigley considers run for Chicago mayor - Roll Call : “Democratic Rep. Mike Quigley said he is considering a run for mayor of Chicago after Mayor Rahm Emanuel announced he would not run for re-election.' Who wouldn’t are keen to being mayor of Chicago? ’ he told the Chicago Sun-Times. Quigley said he is considering it despite the fact he' loves’ his hassle in Congress where he baby-sit on the Grant and Intelligence committees. The Democrat baby-sit on the Cook County Board before his elected to Congress and said any candidate for mayor should' focused on one issue or really being anti-Rahm Emanuel.’ ... Quigley said he is not in a rush to make a decision. ... Quigley is expected to easily win re-election in November in a territory that Inside Elections with Nathan L. Gonzales proportions Solid Democratic.” KAVANAUGH AVOIDS DEM TRAPS, CONFIRMATION VOTE LOOMS Fox News : “Democrats have invested the week trying to catch Judge Brett Kavanaugh in a lie and implement age-old emails to give him as a revolutionary republican. But as Kavanaugh’s chaotic approval hearing winds down Friday, Republicans say they conclude Democrat failed to estate the kind of lethal gale who are able to thwart the nomination. The department of Sen. Chuck Grassley , R-Iowa, the chairman of the Judiciary Committee, said in a statement that Democrat fought' to make a legitimate case’ against Kavanaugh after 2 day of questioning . ... After grilling Kavanaugh for 2 day, senators on Friday are sounding to areas outside witnesses both supporting and opposing the campaigner. This will distinguish the conclusion of its hearing process. Among those invited by the Democrats on the committee on conferences is John Dean , the onetime Nixon White House counsel who turned against the administration during Watergate. The committee, in the coming daylights and weeks, is expected to vote on Kavanaugh’s confirmation before the nomination heads to the full Senate for a final vote.” PLAY-BY-PLAY Senators reach consider on bipartisan opioid crisis packet, referendum next week - Politico AUDIBLE: AND OTHER SYMPTOMS INCLUDE ...? b> “It did not start with Donald Trump. He is a symptom , not a cause.”- Former President Barack Obama discussing political tribalism during a speech at the University of Illinois on Friday . i> ANY GIVEN SUNDAY This given Sunday, Chris Wallace will sit down with Vice President Mike Pence and Sen. Chris Coons , D-Del. Watch “Fox News Sunday with Chris Wallace.” Check regional indices for broadcast seasons in your neighbourhood. #mediabuzz - Host Howard Kurtz has the latest take on the week’s media coverage. Watch # mediabuzz Sundays at 11 a.m. ET. Share your hue commentary : b> Email us at HALFTIMEREPORT @FOXNEWS. COM and delight make sure to include your identify and hometown. SEEING QUINTUPLE WDAF : “The curriculum at Rockhurst High School[ in Kansas City, Mo .] isn't what's paying students and staff headaches. The headache comes as they try to tell each primed of the 5 an organization of twinned friends apart.' We leave it up to the imagination to person it out, so we like to give everybody a challenge, ’ said Connor Green , a freshman at Rockhurst. The freshmen class has five provides of twinned brothers: the Greens, the Garretts, the Tootles, the Warns and the Joyces. It's a unique situation that each of the sons said they feel lucky to be part of . ... Nonetheless,[ their] inconsistencies don't keep these twinneds from having fun at the expense of others.' In baseball, for pitching, I’ll pitch a few innings, and they’ll take me out. He’ll go in, and they’ll think it’s the same guy. They don’t look at the numbers so beings will bicker with us about that, so it’s pretty funny to watch, ’ Trevor Warn said.” AND NOW, A WORD FROM CHARLES ... b> “[ The bureaucratization of prescription] is the inevitable and inexorable reaction of the industrialization of everything from cloth clearing to nutrient busines , now extended to health care. ... My argument is simple. If electronic records are such a great boon -- as I believe they eventually will be -- they will be adopted over go as the benefits begin to transcend payments. Cause the market wreak. Tell doctors breathe.”- Charles Krauthammer ( 1950 -2 018) writing in the Washington Post on June 4, 2015.

Chris Stirewalt is the politics editor for Fox News. Brianna McClelland contributed to this report. Miss FOX News Halftime Report in your inbox every day? Sign up here . i>

This article was written by Fox News staff.

Trending in Politics

Obama returns to campaign trail with fiery lecture, Trump bars 'I fell asleep'

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[racingtoaredlight]

The degenerate’s guide to 2017 college football TV watch ‘em ups: week 8

Last week was odd starting with the Friday games and this week features a few more eye-catching matchups so get ready for everything to go chalk.

The thing that’s got me a little perplexed here is that some of the lines seem very high, especially following on the heels of last week’s carnage. I’m a little short on time so I’ll try to run through these quickly. If that disappoints you, good, I’ve always wondered what it’s like to have kids.

Times are eastern, info is ripped from FBSchedules, gambling info is from Vegas Insider and all advice is guaranteed for the full amount of my weekly RTARL earnings and not a penny more.

Saturday, Oct. 21, 2017

Matchup                                                          Time (ET)                  TV

Akron at Toledo                                              Noon            Raycom/ESPN3

I like the way the games were sequenced this week because if you look at this from top to bottom the first games listed are the lowest of the low but they’re actually starting across from some worthwhile watch em ups.

Idaho at Missouri                                           Noon                   SECN

Missouri is favored by 14 but would anybody really be surprised if Idaho wins? Idaho is so bad they’re giving up on 1-A football but that doesn’t mean they’re worse than Missouri.

Iowa at Northwestern                                    Noon                    ESPN2

Oh, Iowa. So close to beating Penn State and being up in the top 10. But here they are just a couple of weeks later scuffling and roughly equal to Northwestern. Josey Jewell deserves better than this (UPDATE! He won't play in this game.) Those kids in the children’s hospital that looks over the Iowa football stadium deserve more. That hospital has been there all along, right? How come I never heard of it until this year?

Iowa State at Texas Tech                              Noon                      FS1

Classic cross-conference matchup of the dregs of the Big 8 taking on the dregs of the SWC.

Louisville at Florida State                            Noon                     ESPN

FSU is gonna run train on Louisville unless Lamar plays the absolute best game of his life. Think of how good of a game he has to have for it to be the best of his life. QB is legitimately the only position where Louisville is anywhere close to even with FSU let alone where they have an edge.

Maryland at (5) Wisconsin                            Noon                    FOX

Hahahaha - Maryland in the B1G is never going to become normal. It’s so stupid it hurts. Maryland isn’t any worse off from a wins-losses perspective, for what it’s worth. The ACC is better than the B1G from top to bottom and Maryland would be trash in the AAC. If Wisconsin doesn’t win by 40 I’ll be heartbroken and I don’t even really care about Wisconsin.

(10) Oklahoma State at Texas                       Noon                    ABC

Texas is still trash. Is it still Charlie Strong’s fault? Because they’ve got talent it just doesn’t go together for some reason. OK St is the best not really great team in the country. Put them up against any other team in the top 10 and they’d lose but against any unranked team? That’s basically a guaranteed blowout.

Purdue at Rutgers                                         Noon                   BTN

Is the Jeff Brohm to (insert big job opening) train slowed down at all? Or is it understood that Purdue hasn’t had a decent player since Drew Brees retired and so Brohm is getting graded on a generous curve.

Temple at Army                                               Noon                CBSSN

This is absolutely terrible and I love it. You don’t want no part of this Dewey Cox! CBS Sports is incredibly addictive but has no harmful side effects.

Tulsa at UConn                                               Noon                ESPNU

UConn is my least favorite team in the country. They’re boring as all hell but they never win but they also don’t get blown out on a reliable basis. What a waste.

Pittsburgh at Duke                                         Noon                 ACCN

I like to think Miami put Duke into a death spiral. I’ve really disliked David Cutcliffe ever since the Corn Elder return game and I wish Duke would lose every week.

Boston College at Virginia                            12:30 pm           RSN

Hey, Boston College found an offense last week! How much you want to bet they lost it during practice this week? UVA is right on the cusp of being horrible but they keep winning. They should get up to 7-1 before the bottom falls out. 

Kent State at Ohio                                          2:00 pm            ESPN3

I hate MAC football for the same reasons I hate Big XII football - there’s no expectation of anybody ever getting stopped so when a game is close it feels like a ripoff when there’s a game-winning drive. Like it shouldn’t count. Anyway, somebody will win this game.

NIU at Bowling Green                                     2:00 pm            ESPN3

Sutton Smith racks up at least a sack every week and I have no idea if he’s any good at all. I may not know much but I can assure you I won’t know any more about Sutton Smith on Sunday than I do right now.

  Troy at Georgia State                                      2:00 pm            ESPN3

The best part of Troy beating LSU is that they aren’t even particularly great within the context of the Sun Belt. They got knocked back by USA last week so seeing them as a 10 point favorite on the road is disconcerting.

Western Michigan at Eastern Michigan       2:00 pm             ESPN3

I’m trying to stay positive about the MAC this week. I bet that LT for Western gets a bunch of pancake blocks this week. He’s very good.

Buffalo at Miami, OH                                       2:30 pm             ESPN3

Miami and Buffalo had a cool rivaly in the 80s and early 90s. That’s not relevant because I’m talking about the NFL but I really loved Bruce Smith and Dan Marino and Thurman Thomas and Jim Kelly and the Marks Brothers.

Central Michigan at Ball State                       3:00 pm             ESPN3

Central Michigan is favored but Ball State hasn’t lost at home so there’s a storyline!

Arizona State at Utah                                       3:30 pm              FS1

What the hell is this clearly Pac-12 After Dark game doing kicking off at 1:30 Mountain Time? Utah is going to beat the hell out of Arizona State. I don’t think anybody on the planet can actually explain what happened last week in Seattle for the Wildcats but it won’t happen again.

Coastal Carolina at Appalachian State           3:30 pm           ESPN3

Coastal Carolina is close to the bottom of 1-A in almost every offensive and defensive category and App State is about on part with a Power 5 also-ran. 24 points or thereabouts is enticing.

Georgia Southern at UMass                            3:30 pm     11 Sports/NESN

This is one of the worst games possible this year. UMass is a 7.5 point favorite because they’ve actually won this year but if you feel confident betting on a game like this you are an alien.

Illinois at Minnesota                                         3:30 pm             BTN

Is Lovie Smith in danger of being fired? He’s really fucking bad and Illinois is only consistent in their inability to ever get better.

Indiana at (18) Michigan State                         3:30 pm            ABC

Indiana is the Big 10′s version of UVA but they didn’t get the schedule luck that the Hoos have had. It wouldn’t be a shock for the Hoosiers to beat Sparty and it wouldn’t be a shock to see them lose by 20. It’s worth mentioning that Sparty is just sort of OK but they did beat Michigan so we all love them.

North Carolina at (14) Virginia Tech                 3:30 pm          ESPN2

VPISU is a 22 point favorite and that seems low to me. UNC is horrid and the Turkey Gobblers are just barely out of the conversation as an elite team. Next year the Hokies should be a top 10 preseason team.

Syracuse at (8) Miami, FL                                  3:30 pm          ESPN

18 points seems crazy high to me even though I think Syracuse beating Clemson last week was even flukier than Iowa State beating Oklahoma the week before. People are falling all over themselves to talk about what a great job Dino Babers has done at Syracuse but that was basically the first good game we’ve seen from this program in about 13 years. So let’s not get crazy here. Miami’s big problem so far has been that Malik Rosier sucks in the first half. I’m interested to see what they can do if he’s good before halftime for once.

Tennessee at (1) Alabama                                 3:30 pm           CBS

Speaking of crazy lines - holy hell does Tennessee suck right now. Butch Jones is fired, he probably knows it by now. The only reason he’s still walking around on the sidelines is Tennessee doesn’t feel like paying his buyout. I still find it hard to believe that Bama will play hard enough to win by 34 (or even 37 depending on where you go.)

(20) UCF at Navy                                                  3:30 pm        CBSSN

UCF has been destroying people all year but Navy is the worst matchup for basically everybody in the country except Army (and Geogia Tech if they ever played each other.) At some point Nebraska or Texas or somebody is going to throw a ridiculous amount of money at Ken Niumatalolo to get back to 10 wins per season the quick and dirty way.

Kentucky at Mississippi State                            4:00 pm         SECN

SEC! SEC! SEC! No joke, this is probably going to be pretty entertaining as far as these things go. Both teams are just good enough to trick you into thinking they’re really good.

(9) Oklahoma at Kansas State                             4:00 pm           FOX

This would be such a perfect Bill Snyder game for K State to win. There really isn’t a good reason to think they can even compete with Oklahoma but Snyder has figured out even worse matchups before.

Oregon at UCLA                                                    4:00 pm         Pac-12N

I do not trust anything about UCLA. Josh Rosen is a threat to throw 10 interceptions against an Oregon defense that has loads of talent but no real cohesion. Oregon’s offense looked very bad last week without Justin Herbert (broken collarbone) so the Ducks might struggle but I have faith in JMJ to put together a defensive gameplan that still gives up 30+ points.

SMU at Cincinnati                                                 4:00 pm           ESPNU

The ms621s should be able to do whatever they want on offense. The 7.5 point spread seems low to me but I’m not sure it’s so odd as to make me feel good making a strong recommendation one way or the other.

North Texas at Florida Atlantic                            5:00 pm          ESPN3

Lane Kiffin still hasn’t done anything publicly embarrassing and I’m starting to get impatient. How long can this last?

ULM at South Alabama                                          5:00 pm            ESPN3

Maybe USA is out of their stupor now and can play like I thought they would back in early September? Maybe.

Utah State at UNLV                                                 6:00 pm         ATTSNRM

This is an ugly matchup in an ugly setting with no clear buildup. Good luck.

UAB at Charlotte                                                     6:30 pm      beIN SPORTS

UAB is 4-2 and creeping up on bowl eligibility in their first year back as a college football program. That’s one of the coolest low key stories in the sport this year. They have a decent shot to be 8-2 going into Gainesville on November 18th. Florida will be favored but UAB getting to that point with a better record than the Gators would be hilarious.

BYU at East Carolina                                              7:00 pm          CBSSN

No idea what’s going on with this time slot for this game. Both teams are pretty bad with random flashes of good. Who knows what to expect here.

Rice at UTSA                                                            7:00 pm    KMYS/Stadium

This should be a pretty easy win for UTSA. I’m just practicing that being an actual expectation that exists in the world.

Southern Miss at Louisiana Tech                         7:00 pm          Stadium

La. Tech does some cool stuff with their gameplans but I haven’t watched them play this year and they’ve been wildly inconsistent. I’d actually like to see Josh Allen go to Lousiana Tech next year if he does the grad transfer thing instead of declaring for the NFL draft. I think he’ll go somewhere with a higher profile but I’d still love to see him Ruston, LA.

(16) USF at Tulane                                                  7:00 pm            ESPN2

Tulane keeps getting better but so does USF and USF started out much better than Tulane. This should be bad in a fun way.

(24) LSU at University of Mississippi, Oxford      7:15 pm              ESPN

LSU lost three first rounders last year who are all among the NFL’s best rookies this year and they got their coach fired because they sucked so bad. This year is not much different for LSU. 

Wake Forest at Georgia Tech                                7:30 pm            ESPNU

The Wreck should be back to Ramblin’ after Miami shut down the option in the second half last week. There are a lot of things Miami’s players are capable of that Wake Forest’s players are not capable of.

(21) Auburn at Arkansas                                         7:30 pm             SECN

Bert isn’t dead yet! Maybe professionally but he looks like he might literally die at any second and I’m not joking to say I’m a little bit worried for him.

(19) Michigan at (2) Penn State                              7:30 pm              ABC

Michigan is going to make this ugly and James Franklin will do what he always does and try to challenge them on their level and it’s going to end up biting Penn State in the ass and I will never in my life feel happier about Michigan beating somebody.

(11) USC at (13) Notre Dame                                   7:30 pm             NBC

This is oddly important in the larger scheme of things. One of these teams will leave as a 1-loss playoff contender and the other will be playing spoiler from here on out. USC’s defensive front is banged up which is a little frightening with Notre Dame’s offensive line and running game. Here’s to Sam Darnold not playing like a fucking idiot for a full 4 quarters for the first time this year.

Arizona at California                                                8:00 pm          Pac-12N

Arizona’s offensive strengths are not going against the strengths of the Antifa Bears defense so this could get a little wild. Too bad nobody gets Pac-12 Network.

Kansas at (4) TCU                                                     8:00 pm            FOX

TCU is barely favored over Kansas by more than Alabama is favored over Tennessee. I find that hilarious. TCU is at the point in the season where they have to turn it on for style to make sure they stay relevant in the national conversation. That’s very bad for our plucky JVhawks.

(23) West Virginia at Baylor                                     8:00 pm             FS2

Will Grier is on pace to become the big enigma of the 2018 NFL Draft. Get ready for the conversations where he goes from first round sleeper to top 10 possibility to punchline when he gets drafted #3 overall. His gun is real and he’s got just enough size and athleticism to spark the yearly gumflapping about whether the offense he plays in will hinder him from transitioning to the pro game. Can you feel the excitement? As far as this week goes he shouldn’t have much difficulty notching his 7th 300-yard game.

Wyoming at Boise State                                           10:15 pm         ESPN2

The Josh Allen Sucks tour continues with a Boise State team that has maybe just decided not to be terrible all year. He only threw one interception last week so maybe he’s turning things around?

Fresno State at San Diego State                             10:30 pm        CBSSN

SDSU was looking like a New Year’s Six option with a Heisman Trophy contending running back but things are looking different this week after the wheels fell off at home against Boise last week. When they aren’t playing national championship contenders Fresno doesn’t look half bad. This is a big game for the MWC but only has national importance in SDSU wins.

Colorado at (15) Washington State                         10:45 pm          ESPN

Luke Falk did his level best to make Pac-12 football look as fraudulent as possible last week. The Antifa Bears are trying to duplicate the program methodology of Colorado so let’s see if Falk can put up another 5 interceptions against the O.G.

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[t-baba]

4 Signs Your Employer Will Ruin Your Career

"No one will hire me."

Jim Walters was blacklisted. His former boss tried to ruin his career. When prospective employers contacted Jim, they asked for references.

So he sent them.

Inevitably, these employers decided they didn't want to hire Jim. 12 employers made an offer. They all backed out after contacting his references.

His former boss was attempting to ruin his career.

Maybe Your Boss is Terrible

Maybe they're a tyrant, focused on dominating you. Or maybe they're clueless micromanagers harassing you about your work. The real question, though, is this:

Will your boss ruin your career?

It doesn't seem like a legitimate question at first glance.

Who cares? It's not like they can ruin my career. What are they gonna do, tell on me?

A terrible boss will ruin your career. Spend enough time with them and the damage becomes inevitable.

But how?

Aren't there laws to protect employees?

Sort of.

Laws, for the most part, are limited to eavesdropping on private oral communication, anti-discrimination, equal opportunity, etc. But aside from that?

Employers, your boss, can pretty much do what they want, when they want.

Don't believe me? Let's look at a few examples.

Lynne Gobbell was fired because her boss didn't like the bumper sticker on her car. When her boss saw her sticker he said, "either work for John Kerry or work for me." She refused to remove the sticker, and was immediately fired.

Best Lock Company in Indiana fired employees for social drinking at their home. The reason? Their president believes drinking alcohol is a sin. They even go so far as to deny unemployment.

Johnson County Community College installed hidden cameras in their bathrooms and locker rooms. They stated workers had no right to privacy. What's worse, they got away with it.

Glen Hillier was fired from his job at an ad agency. During the 2004 presidential race, he asked President Bush some embarrassing questions. One of his company's customers felt offended and reported it to Hillier's boss. One day later, Hillier was out of a job.

Lewis Maltby, in his book Can They Do That? discloses the abuse workers face in detail.

And there's the problem.

Your employers know they can do what they want. The vast majority of employees know it too, which is why so many people work in fear.

Dysfunctional Employers Feed on Your Fear

They use sadistic and dysfunctional behavior to extract the results they want from their employees. Then, once you're burned out and used up, they toss you aside.

When that happens, you're treated as damaged goods.

Future employers are suddenly nervous about hiring you. You're blacklisted by your dysfunctional employer directly or implicitly. It's suddenly difficult to get a new job.

That's the thing about a ruined career.

It creeps up on you slowly, gradually. Ignore the signs, wait too long and the damage may be irreversible.

Here's the worst part.

The vast majority of developers reject these signals automatically. "It won't happen to me," they tell themselves. Their rejection is based on a wide variety of reasons.

Most believe the solution is beneath them somehow.

Some are afraid they'll dig up unpleasant things.

My company isn't like that, they tell themselves.

Others think "working hard" or doing a "good job" is enough. (It's not.)

Things are good, so why bother with that now?

As developers, we create rationalizations to avoid facing stupid or unpleasant things. But the signs of a bad employer are there, screaming for us to pay attention. You can protect and save your career … if you know how to read the signals. Here are four signals, numbered from 4 to 1 …

Signal #4: Chronic Emotional Invalidation

Invalidation is an attempt by others to control how you feel about something and how long you feel that way.

It's accomplished by rejecting, mocking, judging or minimizing someone else's thoughts, values or feelings. It's a devastating part of work that most developers have come to accept as a normal, everyday part of work.

What does that look like?

Procrastinators are made. A fear of failure, perfectionism, or a lack of focus is all that's needed to induce procrastination. The sad part? All three of these causes are really part of the same problem. Make a mistake and you'll probably lose your job.

Silent and disengaged. Co-workers who couldn't care less about their jobs and are eagerly looking forward to the weekend/holidays/vacation, etc. Thanks to interpersonal dynamics, the idea of doing a job at work has completely lost its appeal for them.

Distracted co-workers are fixated on all the wrong things. They're not working on exciting projects, aren't being trained to do more or simply aren't in the environment of their choice. So these developers focus their time and attention on doing as little as they can.

Fearful. Your manager or boss asks for an "honest opinion" or "feedback" in a meeting. Everyone looks down. They stare at the table or their hands. Everyone in that meeting knows feedback or honest opinion is code for tell me what I want to hear. Mess it up and you're out of a job.

An organization struggling with these dysfunctions runs into a predictable problem. A-player developers quickly leave, while B- and C-players do their best to survive.

Those who stay absorb these bad habits like a sponge, taking them wherever they go, ruining their careers in the process.

Most developers will allow their boss, their employer to hurt their careers --- even after learning about these details.

Why?

They believe that feelings/emotions don't matter. "I'm a logical thinker, I'm clear-headed. These things just don't get to me." Here's why that's a problem.

It's a lie.

That's because logical decision making is a myth.

Antonio Damasio, Professor at the University of Southern California, made the surprising discovery. His research focused on patients who were normal in every way, except one. They all had a damaged limbic system.

They couldn't feel emotions at all. This led to a surprising but unusual problem.

None of Damasio's patients could make decisions.

They were able to logically describe what they should do, but without emotion, they found it incredibly difficult to make the simplest decisions. These people couldn't decide what to eat, when to eat it or even how they should eat.

Damasio found that emotions are absolutely vital for decision making.

It gets worse.

Negative emotions, fear, stress and anxiety, kills your performance. Whether we like it or not, these emotions are slowly chipping away at our ability to perform, giving dysfunctional employers the ammunition they need to hurt our careers.

Signal #3: Codependency and the Drama Triangle

It's a silent epidemic, codependency in the workplace. It's something that makes developers (and employees), in general, miserable. But, what is it?

Here's a simple definition.

When I work on your desires, goals, fears and frustrations more than you do. It's a behavioral problem that masks itself in lots of different ways.

The micromanaging boss

Abandoning your work routine to bail out a co-worker

Allowing someone else to take the credit for your work

Feeling compelled --- almost forced --- to help an irresponsible co-worker solve the problem they created

Offering unasked for advice

Controlling others with guilt, helplessness, threats, shame, advice-giving, manipulation, domination, etc.

Pretending a problem isn't happening or isn't as bad as it really is.

This isn't a comprehensive list. It's meant to show the types of behaviors present in a dysfunctional workplace.

Why does this matter?

The Drama Triangle is a social model of unhealthy human interaction. In an unhealthy environment, developers and employers play a dysfunctional role where everyone fights for control.

Here's how it works.

This dynamic is at play in our personal and professional relationships. Here's an example of what that looks like.

An employer decides to become a rescuer, choosing an employee they feel will help them but also finding one they feel needs a leg up.

Their employee realizes they're making less than their friends and feels victimized, cheated by the employer because they're not being paid enough.

The employee asks for a raise. Employer, feeling taken advantage of (victim state), says No, becomes a persecutor telling their employee they need to see a performance improvement first.

The employee becomes enraged and swears revenge. They make the move to persecutor doing everything they can to punish their employer and their co-workers.

The employee takes revenge, completes the cycle of persecution and destroys the company.

Sounds a bit extreme, doesn't it? I mean, who'd go to the trouble of doing something malicious like this? Ask JournalSpace. JournalSpace was a blogging platform. The keyword is was, because their IT guy (the same guy who was caught stealing from the company), maliciously wiped out the main database (for which there was no backup). JournalSpace shut down immediately.

Here's how his employer described the whole affair.

It was the guy handling the IT (and, yes, the same guy who I caught stealing from the company, and who did a slash-and-burn on some servers on his way out) who made the choice to rely on RAID as the only backup mechanism for the SQL server. He had set up automated backups for the HTTP server which contains the PHP code, but, inscrutably, had no backup system in place for the SQL data. The ironic thing here is that one of his hobbies was telling everybody how smart he was.

Notice how both employer and employee decided to persecute each other. They both had a role to play but neither wanted to accept any responsibility for their role in the situation.

That's the destructive power of codependency and the drama triangle at work.

Continue reading %4 Signs Your Employer Will Ruin Your Career%

by Andrew McDermott via SitePoint http://ift.tt/2xj9HiK

[towardperihelion]

saying hello to “what’s now?”

There is something ironic in writing New Years’ goals in the midst of a major life change. 

Yes, goals, not resolutions. Call it a byproduct of holding two graduate degrees - one in sport and exercise psychology, one in Type A personality - but I have never been one to embrace the idea of New Years’ “resolutions.” They have always been goals, or objectives, if I even bothered with them at all. The idea of a resolution always seemed to resonate to me as the idea of something that I want to change about my old self — I want to be fitter, better, smarter, more worldly, less lazy. These intangible “-ers” never seemed to hold the same promise as setting out in a new year with the mindset that I was laying out things that I wanted to achieve in the following 365 days.

That was the basis of the certain irony to this year’s penning of my annual goals. That’s what happens, I supposed, when you write them at the back end of a process that has made you realize that a lot of the goals that you had held and pursued most recently are no longer realistic or objectives that you are striving to achieve. The last two months of 2016 constituted a massive reset in my life. And in many ways, they spelled out “failure to achieve objectives” in a way that I had never had to confront before in my life.

Let me be clear. In many respects, 2016 was a banner year for me. I coached a team to a second-place finish in the state in my first year of coaching, graduated with my master’s degree and numerous accolades, had my first first-author publication printed, have three others in the works, landed a job at one of the top Boys and Girls Club organizations in the country in a city that I have wanted to live in since childhood, and started a relationship that has been more fulfilling and hopeful than anything that I could ever have imagined. Really, I spent the early months of the year ticking off boxes next to goals that I hadn’t realized that I had held until I achieved them.

And yet, with the change of seasons in October, came two interwoven obstacles that I had never had to deal with while chasing goals and dreams. Their names are anxiety and depression. It started almost literally overnight — my long-distance boyfriend had just come for his first visit to Boston, and the day after he left, it felt like a bag of rocks had been dumped into my stomach… except these rocks had legs and arms and wanted to kick their way everywhere, into my torso, into my brain, and out of my stomach.

The first couple of days, I tried to convince myself that there were any number of explanations: my hormones were out of whack from my boyfriend’s visit, I just missed him, my responsibilities at work were ramping up now that I had settled into the daily flow, it was just PMS, it was some stuff at home, it was anything and everything that wasn’t serious. I was working at a job that had fit almost every tenet of my “ideal” job coming out of my master’s, in a city that I loved and had dreamed of living in for my entire life. But as the days wore on and things got worse, not better, I had to slowly come to confront the fact that I was facing a real problem — and it wasn’t going to go away.

If the weeks of crying almost daily weren’t enough to get my attention, a four-hour breakdown in my boyfriend’s bedroom on Halloween after a panic attack were enough to finally shed some light on the reality of the situation.

I was miserable and too embarrassed — stubborn? — ashamed? — sad? — to admit it.

In some ways, the next two months followed a process that was a little bit more natural for me. It was a big logic problem to solve. Start with a question: Why am I so unhappy? Ignore first instinct: You aren’t. After coming up with a more honest answer, develop another question: What can I do about it? Treating my approach to battling mental health problems in this way, a string of questions that had to have an answer if I looked enough, helped it feel a little bit less like my world was collapsing around me.

Fast-forward two months. Early January. I sit on my new bed, writing out my New Years’ resolutions for 2017.

In two months, I had gone through a series of difficult and cyclical decisions. They culminated in most difficult of all. With the help of an exceptionally supportive set of family, friends, and coworkers, I came to the understanding that I could not help others (which, ultimately, was how I viewed my position as a youth sports and fitness program leader) if I could not help myself first — and so I walked away from Boston and a job I loved because it wasn’t a place where I could be mentally and emotionally healthy right now.

And that’s where I started with my resolutions. Tracing the path of 2016, from the beginning when I was writing my master’s thesis and applying for jobs until the end, when I was packing up my life for the second time in six months to move back to a place I had never expected to return to in Indiana, I came to a realization. The novelty of this realization wasn’t in the fact that I had been grossly unhappy at the end of the year. It was in why.

It wasn’t that I had been disappointed by the job or by Boston. It was that the unfortunate requirements of my job, with evening and weekend hours dictated by the reality of working in youth service, after having relocated a thousand miles from my boyfriend and many friends, had cut out too much of the other things that made me happy. There were other factors, of course — there always are, and factors other than my own health drove me to move closer to family and friends again. But ultimately, I had lost sight of many of the things in life that make me happiest.

My days in Boston consisted of a pattern that rarely deviated. I woke up in the morning, went to the gym or for a run, did a bit of work for my role with my dad’s company or to wrap up some of the loose academic threads that are a reality of publishing papers, went to work, commuted home, and went to bed. (Okay, there were more than a few Dunkin’ stops sprinkled in there — a girl’s got to work somewhere, right?) Many of the things that make me happiest had little or no place in that daily routine. Reading, cooking, diversified physical activity, writing, learning. All of these things were absent from my life by the end of the last year. I was too tired when I got home to do them and my depression leached me of the desire or will to do them in the morning.

And thus were born my New Years resolutions for 2017. Some of them still fall under the old umbrella of strict “goals,” like starting a long-term retirement account and drinking 64 ounces of water every day. But I wrote most of them with the conscious idea (I had to erase the word “goal” there) that meeting these targets would make me happier because they would bring more of the things that I loved back into my life — whether or not I met the ultimate “goal” that I set out. Some of them are related to fitness: run 1,000 miles over the year, try one new exercise regime or workout and one new meal every other week, eat meatless once per week. Some are related to rediscovering my love of academics and new knowledge after graduation and moving away from that world over the summer: complete a reading challenge (that you’ll undoubtedly hear too much about soon), write 20,000 words every month (I used to write daily, but had stopped almost completely by the end of the year), learn something new every day (whether through “auditing” a big class at university, watching a TED talk, taking an online class, whatever it may be). Others are self-care based and designed to hopefully continue to fight the anxiety and depression that still loom in their shades of gray somewhere in my being: do more gratitude exercises, practice accepting compliments, take time for self-care, plan for a big vacation sometime in late 2017 or early 2018.

The list of resolutions is long, but if I make even partial progress towards each of those resolutions/goals, then I will be closer to the things that make me happy than I was on January 1, 2017. I am trying to teach myself the art of realizing that it is okay to “fail” as long as you take something from the experience. That is the most apt way to describe this fall — or so I am training myself to realize. By my past objective standards, this fall amounts to a “failure.” I’m not where I expected to be at the start of 2017. I’m living back in Indiana and working a job outside my desired industry to fill some time until I figure out what direction I want to go next. As I may have been apt to describe it a year ago, I’m in between bullet points on my resume.

But a part of this year’s journey is finding happiness in the things that I have, in many ways, loved and lost. It’s about remember that life exists outside the bullet points of resumes and the constant pursuit of “what’s next?” It’s about focusing on and appreciating the beauty of “what’s now.” For the last several years, I have been too consumed with the first question, without giving enough time and appreciation to the latter. I’d like to blame it on a variety of external factors, but in reality, it’s probably been a combination of personality and circumstance.

I don’t plan on forgetting that first question over the next three hundred some-odd days. But maybe I’ll ask it in different ways, ways that can dip a little bit deeper than the superficial. And the start of 2017 seemed like a good time to reintroduce myself to the second question.

So, what’s up, “What’s now”? I look forward to getting to know you better.