#you just gave me an excuse to talk about drugs and i had to take it

[i-write-hurt-not-comfort]

You made me Like Kou as a addict. I have the song pink cocaine by scene queen in my playlist of Kou now

anon you've made my DAY. in the past i made a long post about this here explaining why i headcanon kou as a drug addict, evidence from the series itself, along with links to my fics where kou is an addict so i'm not going to repeat all that here. in this post however, i did say i could talk more about the specific drugs kou would do so thank you for giving me the perfect opportunity to do that! i could do this for all my favs btw. it's a talent and a curse.

putting it under the cut because it'll be long, and tw for discussions of drug use, comedown, addiction etc. you'll see i know a lot about this.

well the first drug i put kou on has always been cocaine. it's the stereotypical famous, rich person, celebrity party drug. in my laito addict fic, it was kou who first gave laito cocaine. i strongly believe kou could get through 2 bags of coke in a night if he wanted to. personally i've never done coke but i know it makes someone very euphoric and confident and i do feel like kou would absolutely love the feeling of that, especially in a party situation where he's potentially feeling uncomfortable/imposter syndrome.

however, cocaine is quite psychologically addictive. i explained before why i think he'd get addicted and in general, i like to headcanon kou as using uppers. so i'll talk about uppers first. to clarify: "uppers" are drugs which make someone feel very upbeat, energetic etc, whereas "downers" are drugs which make one feel relaxed, calm etc. alcohol is an example of both.

alcoholic kou? yeah, count me the fuck in too! drinking is a great socially acceptable drug to abuse! he could potentially hide drinking from his brothers a bit better until he loses control and doesn't realise how drunk he's getting on a daily basis. drinking is relatively easy to get into a routine of abuse with and again, partying leads to hangovers and that leads to day drinking!

now i've talked a lot about kou using cocaine and drinking in the past, so let's talk about some other drugs! i've written drugs in fanfics for over 5 years now and, well, i have a lil experience myself, ehehe. i am also in my third year of a degree in pharmacology. so, drugs really are my speciality knowledge.

the other main party drug that comes to mind when i think of clubbing and uppers is, of course, ecstasy, aka MDMA. ecstasy itself is a tablet you swallow but you can also get powder MDMA to snort. snorting MDMA tends to make the high come on faster, more intensely, but shorter lasting. in my prison fanfic, kou was an MDMA abuser before going to prison.

MDMA as a drug isn't physically addictive and it has less addictive potential than cocaine but that doesn't mean it's impossible. one of the things that might make kou attracted to MDMA is the fact it makes you feel very connected and affectionate to other people. MDMA is one of the drugs i have done a handful of times, it's my go-to club drug, i much prefer it to alcohol. i often find myself telling people how much i love them etc. it's kinda funny to imagine kou going home, pupils so wide you could land a plane on them, and telling all his brothers how much he loves them.

while 100% MDMA has a slight afterglow and the only negative effect the following day is jaw grinding and tiredness, most MDMA tends to be cut with other substances which can make the comedown unpleasant, and i guess that's where abuse potential comes in. that or kou would use other drugs to avert the comedown. but recreationally, i think kou would like MDMA.

hm, other uppers, i guess we're thinking of amphetamines next - speed, meth, mainly. meth tends to increase alertness, again causes euphoria. i've never used amphetamines of any kind but i know they have a higher addictive potential albeit not physically. it's a bit like coke but lasts longer supposedly. i'm ngl meth is one of the drugs i don't know AS much about. but like cocaine, if kou is chasing that high and feel-good feeling he's been missing his whole life, he's very at-risk once he discovers the meth high.

the other "upper" is nicotine mainly, but nicotine addict kou is a completely different story altogether. i talk about it more here.

so, downers. the first downer i’ll talk about is weed because it’s quick i guess. to be honest i can’t imagine kou using downers as much as uppers because of how he’s probably seeking a more euphoric high - i just think of him as a kid saying how he’s going to fly high in the sky. i have a headcanon where kou, yuma and azusa all smoke weed together, so, yeah. 

next downer to come to mind is ketamine - i guess ketamine is more of a dissociative than a downer. i’ve found a lot of people don’t know what ketamine is; no, it’s not “horse tranquilizer” - it’s used in humans as an anaesthetic more than in veterinary practice, and it’s currently being trialled as a rapid-acting antidepressant! 

that said, when ketamine is used recreationally (and it’s very common over here in the UK) it causes feelings of dissociation. i’ve done ket, i think it’s a bit overrated, it’s just a short-lived out-of-body experience. maybe kou would use it if he’s having sleep issues or is feeling really depressed. some people mix cocaine and ketamine (called “Calvin Klein” or CK) so maybe he’d try that. 

aaaand now we come to opiates or, most probably, heroin. i wrote kou as a heroin addict in my prison fic and i’d say it’s the only downer i can see him using. opiates are just... chill. you feel warm, relaxed, calm. the world is beautiful, it sounds strange but i can imagine kou describing heroin as his blue sky if he got REALLY balls deep in addiction. he used it as stress relief, to feel normal or like himself. just to feel “happy” and escape from any bad feelings. 

problem is, heroin is really addictive and i think he’d fall fast. i think his brothers would notice too, to be honest. he’d be hard to stage an intervention with too, because he’s stubborn. heroin is hard to stop and hard to want to recover from. i can imagine it becoming a major source of conflict in the mukami household if it were to happen. and because of the physical withdrawal, kou isn’t going to want to stop even when it stops being a high and starts just feeling like “normal” 

last category of drugs is psychedelics. psychedelics aren’t really abusable drugs because of how your brain reaches a threshold with their effects and they’re not really party drugs either. i can’t picture kou using them regularly or liking them much. 

to be honest, i would picture kou as having maybe one drug he's using regularly and then using other drugs on top. mixing drugs without thinking, large scale drug abuse i guess. he's got a lot of trauma and he's been wanting to feel good in himself since he was a kid. a very large proportion of drug users do not become addicted but kou? kou's walking a tightrope when it comes to this stuff.

thank you for reading this really stupidly long post. i can and will happily answer any questions about the DL characters and drugs - or drugs in general, if you have any questions about that! doesn't have to be DL related, i'm happy to educate! :)

[bloatedandalone04]

The First Cut is the Deepest

➪the one where you break up then make up. (requested)

Warnings: 18+, angst, smut, fluff, break ups, make ups, swearing, mentions of drugs and alcohol, unprotected sex, make up sex, choking, oral (f receiving), ethan being an ass under the influence, he makes up for it, talks of insecurity, insecure reader (y'all are beautiful, i promise you this), this is a bit of a roller coaster

Word Count: 6.3k

Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine <3

This place was crowded. Way too crowded. 

You were surprised the walls didn’t fall down with how many people were compacted in each room and from how loud the music was, if you could even call it that. 

Someone bumps into you for the third time in the five minutes since you arrived and you had to refrain from yelling at the stranger. He probably wouldn’t have heard you, anyway, so why waste your breath? 

“Y/n! Hi!” Anika says as she wraps her arm around your shoulders. She brought the red cup to her lips and emptied it in one sip, wiping her mouth afterwards. “You’re here!”

“And you’re drunk,” you say back just as Mindy walks up to you. 

“There you are,” she says as she wraps Anika’s other arm around her shoulder. “I told you to stay on the couch. Oh, hey, Y/n.”

You give her a quick smile as she takes her girlfriend from you. “Hey,” you replied. “Have you guys seen Ethan?”

Mindy gave Anika a look before shaking her head. “No, no, I don’t think he’s here,”

Anika gave her a confused smile. “What are you talking about?” She asked before turning to you. “He’s in the living room. He was flirting with a bunch of girls, the last time I checked.”

Your brows furrow while Mindy lets out a sigh. “What?”

“You’re right, she sure is drunk,” Mindy laughed awkwardly. “Can’t trust a word she says.”

At that, you move past them and head towards the living room, ignoring the calls of Mindy. The first person you see is Chad when you enter the living room. He was talking to Tara when you walked up to him, the two of them standing close to one another in the packed room. He greeted you with a smile before he noticed the pissed off look on your face. “Woah, what’s the matter?”

“Have you seen Ethan?” You ask him, ignoring his question.

“Um, yeah, he’s..” he trailed off, turning his head to the right and towards the couch. You do the same and your face heats up when you catch sight of your boyfriend. “Huh.”

Ethan’s appearance wasn’t what caught your attention, no, it was the girl that was sitting a bit too close to him that did. 

Muttering an ‘excuse me’ under your breath, you push past Chad and walk towards Ethan, watching he doesn’t even look up at you when you stand in front of him. “What the hell is this?” You question and cross your arms. 

That got his attention as he finally looked up at you, a grin forming on his lips. “Hey! You made it!” He said and right away you knew he was drunk, no, wasted. “I didn’t think you’d show.”

“You told me to come,” you point out and glare at the way the girl rested her hand on his chest. 

Ethan looked at the floor and opened his mouth in thought. “Oh, yeah,” he said after a few seconds. “I forgot about that.”

“Yeah, no kidding,” you rolled your eyes. “What is this? You ask me to come to this party just so I can see you with some girl all over you?

“What? No, don’t be like that,” he whined and wrapped his arm around the blonde’s shoulder. “This is my new friend, Jaz.”

The way Jaz moved closer to Ethan, and the way he did nothing about it had your blood boiling. “Well, it looks like you’ve got enough company,” you mutter, dropping your arms to your sides as you back away. “I’ll just go home.”

When you turn around and head for the door, you ignore Ethan’s calls of your name, followed by an annoyed grunt as he stood up and went after you. 

You reached the sidewalk when he finally stumbled his way out of the house and caught up to you, nearly tripping over the bush that lined the walkway of the house. He grabbed your arm and stopped you from walking away by turning you to face him. “What was that about?”

At his genuine look of confusion, you glare at him and pull your arm away from him. “What do you mean?”

“That,” he pointed to the house. “In there. What was that all about? Why’d you storm off?”

“There’s no way you just asked me that,” you say and look him up and down, taking in just how drunk he was. “How much have you had to drink?”

He gave you a smile and a shrug. “I don’t know, like, five?”

“Five what?”

“Five cups of everything that was in the kitchen,” he answered as if it were the most obvious thing ever. At your look of shock, he steps away from you. “What’s it matter?”

“It matters because you’re completely wasted and that girl in there was going to take advantage of you,” you say slowly, hoping his drunk mind would process your words.

“Who? Jaz?” At the nod you give him, he waves you off and discreetly rolls his eyes, making your anger rise. “Jaz is a friend, she wouldn’t do that.”

“How do you even know her? Why have I never heard you mention her until now?”

“Because,” he dragged the word out. “She’s in my physics class and invited me tonight. She also gave me some of this powder stuff earlier, but I only had a little bit of it.”

Your eyes widened and you reached over to smack his shoulder. “Ethan! How could you be so stupid?” You ask and his face falls at your words. “Why would you take powder from a stranger? At a party?”

Ethan felt like he was being backed into a corner right now, and even though one part of his brain was screaming at him to ask you to take him home, the other part was telling him that you were his girlfriend, not his mother. “Maybe I thought it would relieve some of the stress you put on me everyday of my life,” he said back.

You furrow your brows and cross your arms again, standing a bit straighter. “Was this before or after you invited me tonight?”

Ethan copied you by crossing his own arms. “Before,” he answered. “But maybe I made a mistake by inviting you since you clearly don’t know how to stop treating me like a fucking child. You’re my girlfriend, not my parent.”

You knew he didn’t mean the harsh words, seeing how drunk he was, but that didn’t stop you from fighting back. It was his decision to get to this point and he’d have to deal with the consequences. “I’m supposed to worry about you, Ethan,” you say, trying to calm the situation down as best as you could. “That’s what people in relationships do.”

Ethan would regret his next words. “Being with you for this long was a mistake,” he muttered, not knowing if you heard him or not. The silence that followed, as well as the tears that gathered in your eyes gave him his answer. His words were harsh and untrue. He knew that, still his drunk self didn’t allow him to give in. “Look, I didn’t mean that. You said it yourself, I’m wasted.”

“And that makes it okay?” You ask as you turn away from him. Ethan sighed from behind you and reached out to grab your arm, retracting his hand when you pulled away from him. “Why don’t you go back to Jaz? Seems like the two of you were having a great time together before I got here.”

“Fine,” he muttered. “We’ll talk later.”

“No, we won’t,” you tell him and he turns back around to face you. “I mean it, we’re over. Don’t text me and don’t call me.”

Your words cut him deeper than you would ever know, and his heart ached at the tears that streamed down your face. But he was angry, and drunk, and a bit embarrassed. And so very drunk. “Fine,” he said again. “You don’t want me to text you? That’s fine by me. Thanks for ruining my night.”

He turned back around and went inside the house. You were left alone on the sidewalk, your eyes stinging as you grabbed your phone. After sending Chad a text about getting Ethan home safely, you began the walk back to your apartment and hoped to anyone that was listening that he didn’t go back to Jaz.

Not that you had a say in what he does, anymore.

-

The spam of texts you woke up to the next morning were unexpected and unwanted. But you still read each and every one of them.

2:34 AM

Ethan <3: we’re not rly broken up are we?

2:35 AM

Ethan <3: I didn’t mean what i said :/

2:56 AM

Ethan <3: pls answer me, I’m sorry

3:23 AM

Ethan <3: I told Jaz to fuck off for you haha

3:26 AM

Ethan <3: she punched me

3:34 AM

Ethan <3: i wish u were here :C

4:43 AM

Ethan <3: goodnight i love you im sorry

10:32 AM

Ethan <3: I don’t remember much of last night, but I do remember how awful I was to you. I’m so sorry, baby, I didn’t mean any of it. 

10:37 AM

Ethan <3: If I could take it all back, I would. I love you and I hope you slept well because I sure as shit didn’t. Can we please meet up and talk about it in person? I miss you.

Your eyes ached from crying last night, and the brightness of your phone screen didn’t help.

After reading every text, you were more upset than you were last night. 

You tried to remember that he was very wasted and wasn’t himself because of that, but he still said what was on his mind; how being with you was a mistake. 

What was that saying? Drunk words are sober thoughts? Maybe it was true. Maybe Ethan had to get himself drunk so he could tell you how he really felt. 

What about the texts? He seemed pretty genuine. 

But how could you tell that over text? Maybe he was just feeling guilty and wanted to end things on a better note. 

Endless thoughts flooded your mind and you felt a headache beginning to set in.

So, unsure of what to say to him, you type a message that would surely get how you were feeling across perfectly.

I thought I told you not to text me.

Seen at 10:56 AM

-

“Y/n,” Ethan said as he stood in front of you. “There you are. I’ve been looking all over for you.”

The sound of his voice made you look up from your sketchbook, your eyes narrowing at your ex. You exhale harshly, looking back down at the page, scribbling in the grass you drew with a green pencil crayon. “I thought I told you not to talk to me,”

“Come on, you were serious?” He asked as he gripped the strap of his bag tighter. 

You looked up at him from your spot against the tree, bringing your knees up to your chest and placing the book against your thighs. “Were you serious?” You ask instead of answering his question. Your eyes linger on the bruise on his cheek, your mind going back to his texts of ‘I told Jaz to fuck off for you’ and ‘she punched me’. 

Your eyes darkened at the thought of her hitting him when she was the one who went and gave him drugs while also hanging off of him right in front of you.

But that was a conversation for another time.

He looked down at you, his brows furrowing as he stepped closer to you. “What do you mean?”

You glare up at him, dreading having to repeat his words from last night as you take a deep breath. “‘Being with you for this long was a mistake’?” You quote him and watch as his eyes squeeze shut and his head tilts back. “Ring any bells?”

Ethan cursed under his breath before opening his eyes again and you could clearly see the regret clouding in them. “Fuck, Y/n,” he muttered and shook his head. “Baby, I didn’t mean that, I swear.”

You wanted to believe him, but you were also far too stubborn for your own good. “Then why did you say it?” You closed the sketchbook and reached for your bag as you held eye contact with him.

“I don’t- fuck, I don’t know,” he said, watching as you began to gather your things. His eyes widened at that, knowing damn well that you were seconds away from getting up and leaving him behind. “I’m an idiot and I promise I will never go near alcohol or drugs ever again.”

“It’s not about the alcohol or drugs, God, Ethan,” you shake your head and shove the book in your bag before standing up. “Do you even know it felt for me to hear you say those things? To hear the one person I trust and love more than- you know what? Forget it.” You begin to walk away from him, slinging your bag over your shoulder as you did so. 

“What? No, please, Y/n, baby, wait, I-” he was cut off when a guy from one of your classes stopped in front of you and blocked your way out of the gated area of the school.

“Hey, it’s Y/n, right?” The boy asked and Ethan glared at him from behind you. 

You give him a forced smile before nodding. “Yes,” you answer, stepping back to create some much needed distance between you two. “Hi, Simon.”

Simon gave you a sly smirk, glancing at the pissed off looking guy behind you. His smirk only grew and he looked you up and down before meeting your eyes once again. “I heard you and that boyfriend of yours are finally done,” he begins, knowing very well that your boyfriend was standing right behind you. 

“Finally?” You question and watch as his smirk widens. 

“I know, right?” He purposely takes your question out of context and steps closer. “So now that you and lover boy are over, what do you say about being with a real man?”

You visibly cringed and opened your mouth to respond when his hand reached out to touch your arm. Before it could, though, a hand wrapped around his wrist and roughly pulled his arm away from you. 

Ethan stood next to you, a protective and dangerous glint in his eyes that you had never seen before. It made you swallow silently as you looked between the two guys, subconsciously moving closer to Ethan. “I think you’re a little bit out of your league there, Simon,” his voice was deep and deadly as he stepped in front of you, shielding you from Simon’s view. 

He didn’t give up easily, however, as Simon stood a bit taller, matching Ethan’s height. “Is that so?” He asks, tilting his head at the boy who covered you from his sight. “What makes you think that?”

“Mainly the confidence,” Ethan answers, watching as Simon squints at him in confusion. “It’s clearly just a cover up for how hopelessly useless you are to any girl who gives you the time of day. How many girls have you talked to within the past two hours? I’m assuming way too many as you had to resort to going after one that’s taken. Let me spare you the rejection we both know is going to happen if you continue to bore her with your awful excuse of a pick up line. She’s not interested.”

Simon remained silent as he glared at Ethan, his shoulders raising with every angry inhale he took. “You’ve got a lot of nerve,” he muttered, most likely wanting to intimidate the smaller, though not by much, boy. 

Ethan held his ground as he let out a sarcastic laugh. “What, that wasn’t clear enough for you?” He asked and dared to move closer to the jock. “Let me make it simple as possible; fuck off.”

While Ethan didn’t look mean or have the face of someone to fear, he became a different version of himself when defending those he cared for and loved. In this case; you. He wasn’t one to give assholes like Simon the time of day, but when it came down to defending you against guys like him? He was a completely different person. 

And Simon must’ve seen this as he scoffed and backed off, raising his hands in defense. His eyes lingered on the bruise Ethan wore and must’ve thought he had gotten it for a completely different reason, like a fist fight or something, as it clearly intimidated him just the smallest bit. “My bad, bro,” he muttered before turning around.

Ethan watched him walk away until he was out of sight, before turning to a stunned and silent you. His heart fell at the shocked look displayed across your face, taking it as a sign that he fucked up again. Would you ever talk to him again after this?

He opened his mouth to apologize, but closed it when he saw your look of surprise morph into one he’s seen you give him many times before. 

-

The walk back to his apartment went by in a blur and before he knew it, he was pushing open the door to his room without disconnecting his lips from yours. He backs you into the room and towards his bed, guiding your body around the various furniture crowding the space. He shrugs off his bag and throws it to the floor, and you do the same, sliding the strap off your shoulder and dropping it beside the bed just seconds before you fall onto it.

Ethan hovers over you, his lips never breaking away from yours as he grabs your waist and pulls your lower half against his. His tongue swipes across your lip and you open your mouth without a second thought, making him smirk into the kiss.

You were still his, and still so responsive. 

His lips broke from yours as he trailed kisses down your neck and shoulders, sucking a sizable mark onto your collar bone. And you allowed him, further proving to him that breaking up for even a second was a mistake, and that, as long as he had a say in it, you’d always be his.

“Did you sleep with Jaz?” You ask out of the blue, making his attack on your neck come to a complete stop.

“What?” He asked against your skin, his voice sounding muffled. 

You swallowed heavily and reached your hands up to grip his shoulders, making him lift his head to look at you. “It’s just…after what happened last night and the fight….” you trial off, looking to the side. “I just want to know if you slept with her, that’s all.”

“That’s all?” He asked in disbelief as he pulled away from your neck to getsure to his cheek. “Does this look like the face of someone who had sex last night?”

You stare at the bruise, your eyes softening as you bite down on your bottom lip. “No, but, the thought was there,” you say quietly, not wanting to ruin the moment but needing to get your feelings out. “She’s really pretty.”

Ethan narrowed his eyes at you, leaning down to brush his nose against yours. “You’re prettier,” 

You force a smile out at that before shaking your head. “I bet all the guys find her hot,”

“All the guys except one,” he said and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips. “What’s this about? We’ve never had any trust issues before.”

“I know, it’s just….I thought, maybe, you liked her more than me,” Ethan’s mouth opens in shock at your words but you continue before he could say anything. “I mean, she invited you to that party for a reason. She likes to have fun, go to parties, get drunk, do drugs and I don’t like to do any of that stuff. I thought that maybe….maybe you realized you made a mistake by being with me when you could instead be with someone like her.”

When Ethan was sure you were finished, he positioned himself so his lower body was laying on yours and his arms were by either side of your head. “Baby,” he said softly, his gaze lingering on your lips. “I already told you, the only mistake I made with you last night was letting you walk home alone and letting you think that you’re not good enough for me. You’re better than every single other person in my life and I don’t deserve you. I love you and I fall in love with you more and more everyday. You’re my person, my best friend and my girl. I don’t care about anyone else. How could I when I have you?”

Your eyes stare into his and the familiar sting of tears forms, but you blink them away and caress the sides of his face. “I love you,”

Ethan leans forward and presses a kiss to your lips, pulling away for just a second to mumble back an “I love you,” before he was closing the gap once more. One of his hands slid up your body to grasp at your chest, his thumb rubbing against the peak of your breast through your shirt. “You’re so beautiful, so perfect. Too perfect for me.”

His words set butterflies loose all over your body and send jolts of want directly to your core. Slowly, you could feel each and every negative thought you had about yourself slip away, and they were replaced with an overwhelming feeling of love for the boy currently on top of you. 

Ethan’s lips moved back down your neck and continued until he reached the hem of your shirt, where his fingers lifted it up enough to expose the skin of your stomach. “My pretty girl, how could I ever even look at someone else when you’re everything I could possibly want?” He pops open the button of your shorts and unzips them before sliding the jean fabric down your legs. “‘M so sorry I made you feel like you weren’t enough.”

You watch him with blown wide eyes as he inches closer and closer to your clothed core, a small smirk gracing his lips when he meets your eyes.

“Let me make up for it,” he murmured against the skin of your thigh. He placed a few kisses to both of your hip bones before tugging on the lace of your underwear with his teeth. “Let me show you how beautiful you are to me.”

The thin fabric was pulled from your body in one swift motion and he was back to hovering over your core.

“Will you let me?” 

You’ve never nodded faster in your life.

That was all Ethan needed before he got to work with one goal in mind; fuck the insecurity out of you.

He licked a flat stripe up your folds before wrapping his lips around your clit. He sucks on it harshly, giving you no warning as he got right into it. Your mouth opened in a quiet moan, your head dropping back on his pillow. 

Your hand reaches down to tug on his hair, your fingers threading through he curls as he swirled his tongue on your bundle of nerves. He moaned against you at the feeling of your hand tugging his hair and you felt another wave of want ripple through you. Your hips buck up involuntarily, making Ethan’s arms wrap under your thighs and his hands grip your waist as he pinned you down on the sheets. 

Ethan was never one to hold back his sounds in bed. If he was feeling good while taking part in bedroom activities, he made it known by the grunts, groans and whines that left him. It made you never question whether or not you were pleasing him as his sounds were proof enough. He even found pleasure when he wasn’t the one being touched, like right now. Just the thought of him being the one to get you off was more than enough to satisfy him. 

“Fuck, Ethan,” you moaned when he continued to circle his tongue around your clit, flicking and sucking and tugging until he felt your thighs press against his wrists, begging to close around his head. “Please.”

Ethan was stronger than you, though, especially in a situation like this, so his hands easily grabbed hold of your thighs and kept them spread apart. “My needy girl,” he mumbled when he pulled away from your swollen clit. “I’ve barely started and you’re already begging me for more.”

You knew you wouldn’t last long, not with the way he was touching you and definitely not with the way he was talking to you. Behind closed doors, he became a different person. It was such a big contrast to how he was in public. He was always seen as the shy, quiet guy who couldn’t possibly have one bone to fear in his body, but it was just an act, really. 

He liked playing up the role as the nice guy, the quiet friend who was always just there, when in reality, the things he did in his alone time were nothing short of sinful. And most of those sinful things happened when he was with you. 

When he was alone with you he became more needy, more desperate for you and he never failed to be overcome with the desire to please you, touch you, fuck you in any way he could. 

You were so beautiful and hot and his, how could he not want to just devour you everytime he got you alone?

Ethan pressed a final kiss to your clit before moving down and licking a line up your folds, hearing the sharp intake of breath from you as you tried to relax your thighs. 

Your other hand joined the one that was tangled in his hair, needing something, anything at this point, to hold onto as the last bit of your self control was slipping away from you as the seconds went on. 

Ethan spread your lips apart with the tip of his tongue before it easily slipped inside and was instantly coated in you. He keeps it there, still and unmoving, and waits for you to lift your head to look at him. When you do, like he knew you would, the corner of his mouth turns upwards and he begins to fuck the set of muscles into you.

Your eyes stare into his as his hands release the tight grip they had on your hips. Your hands leave his hair when he gently tugs at your wrists and he laces your fingers together before resting your joined hands on your stomach. 

Keeping eye contact, Ethan ran his tongue along your walls, feeling how they pulsated around him. You hopelessly clenched around him as a fire burns in the pit of your stomach, urging him to continue as desperate pleads leave your lips. “I love you,” you whispered in between moans. “Fuck, I love you.”

Your words fill in the holes in his heart that had formed last night, when he went to bed without knowing where you two stood, not knowing whether or not you were his anymore. As he let Chad push him onto this very bed a few hours after you broke up with him, he quickly realized that sleep wouldn’t overtake him as quickly as it would when he had the reassurance that you were still together. 

He was tired, but he also never felt more alive and awake than he did right now. It was only a couple of hours ago that he had set out to look for you (after reading your text that broke his heart further) with a sore face that he had yet to do anything about as it wasn’t even close to being a priority at this point. He had to find you, apologize and possibly beg you to take him back. 

Now he had you pinned to the bed, practically dripping for him because it was true. Your heart belonged to him, and his belonged to you. It was as simple as that.

At the feeling of your hands tightening against his, he knew you were close and he was desperate to get you to that point where you couldn’t focus on anything else other than him.

Him, who fucked you so good like he always did. 

“Don’t stop,” you begged, your voice barely a whisper. “Please, please.”

When he lifted his head just a bit higher so his nose brushed against your sensitive clit, you were coming without warning. Your thighs encased his head, and this time he let you, and your body shook at the release flowing through you. 

Ethan continued to fuck his tongue into you until he was sure he swallowed every drop you had to give him, before pulling away with a boyish grin gracing his face. 

Heavy pants leave your lips as he wipes at his mouth with the back of his hand, pulling his shirt off a few seconds later. He drops the fabric to the floor and pops open the button on his jeans but makes no move to push them down as he crawls back on top of you. His lips capture yours again, quickly taking your breath away once more. 

Within seconds his hands are tugging your shirt upwards and off your shoulders, carelessly tossing it aside to join his. Your fingers find themselves on the waistline of his jeans and you make quick work of unzipping them and pushing them down his legs, all while keeping your lips locked on his. 

Tugging down his boxers as well, you break away from the kiss and instantly his lips are on your neck, sucking his mark on you. Your hands hold his waist, pulling him even closer to you as you shift your hips upwards, creating the tiniest bit of much needed friction. 

Ethan got the hint pretty quickly, sensing that you had recovered enough and weren’t as sensitive as you were a couple of minutes before. Keeping one hand under your back, he moved his other downwards and lined himself up with you. Before he could allow himself to enter you, he looked deep into your eyes, his hand inching around your shoulders to brush away the stray strands of hair that messily covered your face. He tucked them behind your ear, keeping eye contact as he murmured, “You’re the only girl I could ever want. The only one I love,”

His lips brushed against yours as he slid past your folds, entering you easily. You moaned into the kiss, pressing your lips harder against his as you threw your arms around his neck, your nails lightly scraping against his skin as he began to set a steady pace. 

“‘M sorry,” you whisper as your body moves with his thrusts. “I got jealous and I wasn’t being fair to you.”

Ethan shook his head as his pace slowed a bit, but not enough to the point where you felt the need to complain about the speed. You don’t think you could ever complain when being intimate with him as he never gave you a reason to. 

He leaned down to press his forehead against yours, his nose bumping gently into yours every time he slid back into you. “You have nothing to be sorry for, pretty girl,” he told you, and his words made a small smile form on your lips as you stared at his slightly open mouth. “Nothing to apologize for when I’m the fuck up here.”

Your eyes flickered upwards and you looked into his brown irises, seeing a hint of guilt still present in them. “It doesn’t matter anymore,” you murmur, keeping his face close to yours. “Nothing matters as long as we’re together.”

Ethan grins as that, his hand smoothing down your hair as his hips grind into yours. “My sweet girl,” he mumbled. “You’re too good for me.”

His lips pressed to yours in a gentle kiss. Your hands move up to tug on his hair, your fingers threading through the strands when he resumed his pace from a couple seconds ago. Your moans are lost to his mouth as he kisses you with a desperation you haven’t seen since your very first time together, back when both of you were still virgins in high school. 

It wasn’t all that long ago, maybe just over a year, but it had still been a while since he kissed you, touched you, fucked you with such need, desperation and want. It had you feeling lightheaded and chills appeared all over your body, despite the room getting hotter as the seconds went on. 

The kiss was broken as Ethan tucked his head away against your neck, where he let out throaty groans that sent waves of heat directly to your core. You clenched around him when you heard his breathy grunts, your arms sliding under his to claw at his back.

The sting of your nails sinking into him had Ethan groaning loudly, his pace picking up and his hands gripping your waist tightly. While your fingers were sure to leave crescent shaped indentations on his skin, his were undoubtedly going to leave bruises on yours. 

He was actually surprised he hadn’t broken you yet with how rough his thrusts were and how tight his hands were holding you. You took everything he gave you and more and the thought had him holding himself back from an early release, one of his hands sliding down to wrap your leg around his waist. 

The new angle caused him to reach deeper into you, his tip brushing against the sensitive spot deep in your core. Your eyes rolled back and your chest arched up into his. Once your legs were locked around his hips, he used his free hand to tug down one strap of your bra. 

It fell off your shoulder easily and he reached around you to unclasp the black material. You helped him by sliding the other strap off and removing it from your body completely, dropping it into the growing pile of clothing beside his bed. 

With your chest now fully exposed to him, Ethan had no control over his movements as he leaned down and wrapped his lips around your nipple. He tugged on the bud, making breathy moans leave your lips and your eyes close. 

The sensation from both his hitting yours and his mouth on you was beginning to be too much. It didn’t help that every time he fucked into you, his skin would brush against your swollen and sensitive clit. 

Moans were freely leaving your mouth at this point and you no longer had any control over them. Your heels pressed against his lower back, effectively making him inch even deeper into your greedy heat. Your walls hugged his length in a tight grip that could only be described as a vice, your previous release allowing him to slip in and out of you with no resistance.

You tugged his head closer to yours, your teeth tugging on the skin below his ear. “I’m close,” you mumbled, the fire in your stomach growing with each thrust of his hips. 

“Yeah?” He asked, one hand reaching up to wrap around your throat. Your eyes widen at the sudden pressure and your moans become more breathless as you lean into his touch. It wasn’t a tight hold he had on you, but it wasn’t a gentle one either. It was just enough to have you seeing stars in the best way possible. “You’re going to come for me again?”

The words he said in bed never failed to turn you on and have you unraveling beneath him. “Fuck, yes,” you whimpered, both from nearing the edge and from his grip on your neck. “Please, please, Eth.”

“Let me feel you,” he said through a clenched jaw, refraining from finishing before you did as his tip continued to graze against your sweet spot. “All over me.”

His words, that were borderline filthy, send you over the edge and you clench around him again, arching your back and pressing your head against the soft pillows. Your moans are music to his ears and he would happily have your sounds play on repeat in his head over and over again for the rest of his life.

Your eyes close as you let him use you in chase of his own release. The sensitivity makes your hands grip his shoulders tightly, your legs shaking around his waist as he reaches his climax as well. 

His warmth fills you up entirely, and you thread your fingers through his hair as he rides out his high, his whimpers and whines being lost to the skin of your neck.

Minutes go by with him still buried in your warmth, both your chests beginning to rise and fall at a regular pace. Ethan grins as he lifts his head, making your lips turn upwards as well as he leans in and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips. “I really am sorry,” he mumbles when he pulls away, his eyes fixated on your kiss swollen lips. “Again.”

You just shake your head and pull him back onto you as you turn on your side and cuddle into his chest. “It’s okay,” you say back, running your fingers over his chest. “Next time, instead of inviting me through text, just take me with you.”

Ethan nods in agreement, wrapping his arms around you as you tangle your legs together. “Deal,”

[ja3hwa]

♡ 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐌𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐅𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐃𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 | 𝐊.𝐇𝐉 ♡

【Synopsis】 : Hongjoong wanted your first time to be special and romantic. Soft.....this is not what he had in mind. Whoops.

『Word count』 :  5.17k

-> Genre: So Much Smut. Fluffy. Romantic.

Pairing: Dilf!Hongjoong x Park!Reader

[Warnings] : I want to make this a realistic first time. It's funny, there's jokes and mistakes. It's loving. The reader is scared but not of Hongjoong. Insecurities. Oral. Fingering. Squirting. Making out. Praise kink. Bratty sub reader. Soft dom Hongjoong. Lots of lovey-dovey shit. Cute little kisses. Confessions. Daddy kink. Pet names. Unprotected sex cause these two forgot about it until after. Whoops. There is so much dirty talk and slight degrading. This is so filthy and soft and all over the place. Listen man I’m so hooked on sappy romance. And to the bitch that hated angels outfit cause it ‘not 10pm dinner date worth’, theres a part I wrote in here just for you.

Masterlist | Navigation | Part Five | Mini Series Masterlist.

 “If you don’t get back in my car right now, I’ll drag you into it.” His words were dark, tainting on your lips. It was like a drug you’d never get enough of. Quickly, without slipping, you got back into his expensive car, your hand never leaving his thigh as he drove and your lips suckling on his neck. Hongjoong was glad it was almost two in the morning and no one was on the road otherwise he would of most likely hit someone with how fast he was going. He made it back to his apartment in no time and without another moment to spear, he dragged you towards the elevator by your hand. Fingers entangled with yours.. he pinned you against the wall in a feverish kiss, holding the back of your neck, guiding your mouth with his. This was not what he wanted your first time to be like. But god, did he need every second of it.

The way his hand crept up your dress, crawling at your hips. Feeling your frilly panties along his fingertips. His tongue raked down your hot skin, suckling a bright red mark on your neck. He was going to litter you with his marks, every part of your beautiful untouched body. Taint it like you were made for him. He was going to fuck you like it was the last thing he was ever going to do. Because you deserved every treatment he gave you.

-

You didn’t get time to take in your surroundings as you kept your lips flushed against Hongjoong’s. It was only when it was proving difficult to get your docs off when you both ended up laughing and grinning like idiots. Hongjoong was the first to pull away, pushing you slightly to lean against the hallway table so he could kneel down in front of you. You’ve never felt such a feeling like you had right now…This powerful older man, on his knees in front of you, slowly and carefully taking your shoes off. If he wanted you to feel like royalty, he was doing a bang-up job. 

“You like me on my knees, hmm? Angel?” He seemed to notice the way your mind had wandered off. Blush erupted over your face, feeling embarrassed of being caught bluntly staring. 

“I..Uh..” You looked around the hall, trying to find something to distract yourself as Hongjoong placed your right foot back carefully on the floor, having finished removing your shoes. Your sight caught the most amazing thing you’ve ever laid eyes on. “Holy shit…”

“Excuse you?” Hongjoong laughed at your potty mouth, but you walked down the hall, entering the large, dining, kitchen, and lounge room area. It was all opened with floor-to-ceiling windows. You could see almost the whole city. You’ve never been this high up before either, so it made the view even more grand. You watched in awe as the city light captivated you. You were so distracted you almost didn’t notice Hongjoong’s hands snaking around your waist, tugging at the strings on your corset, ever so slightly loosening it with every pull. his eyes never leaving the side profile of your stunning face. “It’s beautiful isn’t it.”

But he was not talking about the city view…

"It is..." You whisper. His lips inched against your neck, kissing down until he got to your left shoulder. Your shall had been forgotten long ago, most likely still in the car. And as you stood frozen watching the scenery beyond the thick glass so intensely, you felt Hongjoong finally slip off the belt around your plump hips, chucking it somewhere in the room. His fingers played with the fabric of your dress while you tilted your head to the side to give him better access. He could smell the sweet perfume on your skin. Feel the way he created goosebumps on your soft skin from the hot breath from his nose. His fingers would tangle, tug, and pull any part of your delicious outfit. The outfit he swooned over at dinner. The outfit he couldn’t help but smile at, thinking how sweet you looked, just like those strawberries that were embroidered on it. The outfit he was going to take great pleasure in taking it off you. Or maybe he’d fuck you in it first, watch how your nipples would peak through the layers of cotton. Feeling the roughness of the frills on his thighs as he thrusted in you hard. He’d keep those pretty little white socks you still have on as well. You’d be the most perfect little treat for him. “Hongjoong…”

He took a step back as you called for him. Standing so still, you didn’t dare to turn around. You could hear him move, the sound of fabric shifting, leather rubbed against jeans until… The clank of something metal hit the carpeted ground. 

“You wanna turn around Angel.” His voice was smooth, deep. Hypnotic. His words made every nerve burn in anticipation. This was really happening, he really wanted to have sex with you. Your heartbeats were hard, like a low base bashing on your chest. Thump, thump, thump. You could feel yourself become high head. Dizzy. Like your mind was slipping into a subspace of your mind you’ve never been before. “Baby.”

He called again but this time he was back right behind you, his hands on your hips made you take in a sharp breath. And without a second thought, you reached behind your body, pulling at the string that held the waist hem of your dress taught to your frame. Hongjoong didn’t dare take his eyes off your delicate fingers playing with the string, not until it was completely loose and the dress started to sag. Only having your shoulders keep the fabric up. Neither of you spoke, it was like you were both holding your breath. Waiting for the other to do something. You finally turned around.

His shirt was gone, the top button of his jeans was undone and his belt by your feet. You would never get enough of this man. The way he was built. The scars and tattoos decorated him like a human canvas. Everything was perfect. He was perfect. “H-Help me…”

He didn’t know he could move so fast, his fingers lacing under the cotton resting on your shoulders, slowly... go slowly god damn it. He screamed to himself as he pushed the fabric off you. The dress fell quickly, pooling by your feet. But he did not dare look down. No. His eyes stared into yours so desperately. he felt like he was in a dream and if he looked at your body he feared his cruel brain would wake him up. You took the ranes this time. Unclasping your bra without breaking eye contact with him. He could see the swell of your breasts out the corner of his eyes but he refused to look. The thump from the article of clothing falling to the floor made his heartbeat fall into his throat. And then his eyes widened, audibly gulping as you reached for his left, tatted hand. He felt your soft skin against his, and then he felt your hot plump chest in his rough palm. You hitched in a breath, feeling your overly sensitive nipples scrape along his hands. 

Hongjoong finally looked.

Taking in a big shaky breath, he saw you. He saw your soft curves, your juicy breasts. The way the balls of flesh rose and fell with each sharp breath. He made a mental note to kiss every stretch mark, scar, and blemish on your body. You are perfect. His other hand gripped your free breast, fondling your flesh. Your eyes fluttered close, tilting your head back slightly. Little pants would slip from your parted lips, as Hongjoong would start to leave light feverish kisses on your jaw, neck and collarbone. He would lower himself slightly, before slowly, pushing you backwards. you’d gasp loudly when your bare back would hit the ice-cold glass of the window. Hongjoong quickly knelt in front of you. Kissing between your breasts before latching his mouth on one of your nipples, while his free hand gripped your right thigh slowly, softly… parting your legs. You looked down at the older man, seeing his intense stare as he watched your every move closely. “Yes, I do….”

He looked confused for a moment, curious as to what you might be answering… and then you spoke out again. “You on your knees…I like it.” You felt like crawling out of your skin, feeling embarrassed at your words. But Hongjoong had a different expression. He growled, kissing down your pretty tummy, finding your stretch marks on the side of your hip, before kissing each and every one. He could do this for hours if he so wished, but for now, he just quickly pepper kisses a few before stopping just above the hem of your panties. He glanced back up at you one more time, slowly without breaking eye contact his fingers hooked under the soft cotton fabric before slipping them off down your legs. You were now completely bare in front of him.

“Fuck, angel. Aren't you the most gorgeous thing I’ve ever seen. So soft.” he kisses your thigh. “So plump.” And gripped the flesh of your legs to move apart until he could see your dripping pussy. “So wet and ready for me.”

“F-fuck Joong!!” His name slipped off your tongue like it was your favourite thing to say. Fingers dug into his fluffy hair as he pressed his nose against your already sensitive clit and inhaled. You were the most delectable thing he’s ever had, and your taste was all he was craving. So he dived right in, his tongue flatting against your hole before licking all the way up, swiping over your nub. He did the same motion a couple of times before he shoved his tongue inside. He needed to prep you well. Get you nice and wet, and he was loving every minute of it. The way your head was thrown back against the glass, moans spilling from you, becoming his new favourite melody. 

He could feel you were close by the way your body started to shake, struggling to keep yourself up. He, without a second thought, pulled away, nearly knocking the wind out of your lungs at the sudden loss of pleasure. But before you could say anything, he was tugging you down to the soft carpeted floor with him. He wasn’t expecting to fuck you on the floor. God no. Not today anyway. But he wanted to make you cum a few times first before pounding you into his mattress. 

“There, there angel. I’ve got you.” His soft voice made your head spin as you laid on your back with your legs spread as far as they could go. You needed him in every way as he latched back onto your soaked cunt, sliding in a finger. You knew you were already falling over the edge. You’ve never climaxed so hard before, seeing white and hearing a light buzz in your ears. Those romance novels had seemly been correct when it was the right man, he would be able to give you everything. Including the most mind-blowing orgasms.

“Fuck, J-joongie I f-feel weird.” You needed to come again, rolling your hips against his now two scissoring fingers his tongue didn’t stop its desperate antics and then Hongjoong sucked harshly against your clit. You swore over and over as your legs began to shake, you cried a silent scream in the next breath as you felt Hongjoong sit up.

“Holy shit…” His deep chuckle caught your attention, opening your eyes you see in horror… Hongjoong was covered in a wet liquid. His chin, cheeks and chest dripping… d-did I just squirt? “That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

You felt your face heat up, wiggling a bit so you could sit up. The floor was a mess, and so were your inner thighs. But Hongjoong couldn’t care less, all he was thinking about was if he could get you to do that again. “Come on baby. Let’s move to somewhere more comfortable before I fuck you on this floor.”

He spoke so casually, but you could hear the lust dripping from his tongue. He was holding himself back, wanting to restrain himself and your little bratty attitude caught onto it quickly. Smiling, you pushed yourself up on your knees, while he watched intensely. You crawled over to him before resting your hands on his shoulders, his face so close to yours. “You gonna take me to bed Hongjoong? You’re best friend's daughter?” You whispered, inching closer. “What would he think? Hmm? Tainting my innocence.”

“I’ll do more than taint your innocence baby…” He knew what game you were playing, grabbing your hair, and tugging it back, making you forcibly look up to the roof. His nose glided across your neck before he suck a harsh red mark on your soft skin. “I’m going to fuck you until your head is filled with nothing but me. My cock. The way I fuck you. The way I’d make love to you… I’ll ruin you for any other man.” He bit down hard on your collarbone surely leaving indents of his teeth. “Cause you’re mine now princess. Mine alone.”

Him saying he’d love you causes a different feeling to grow in the pit of your stomach. A feeling you know you’d have to discuss tomorrow. But for now, as he led you to his bedroom. Your wobbly legs found themselves perched at the entrance of Hongjoong’s lavish room. It was not as you were expecting. He looked like such a minimalistic man, with a simple, sleek style. But yet his room... was filled with unique forms of art, house plants—some fake and some real—an abundance of vinyls, CD’s and a beautiful vintage record player, sitting in the corner of the room. The dark brown wooden stand the record player laid on matched his spruce bed frame well, and his dark near black bed sheets screamed the mystery man you knew him to be.

There was only one thing out of place. On his desk, besides two custom-made motorbike helmets that he most certainly painted himself, was nail polish. Rows of bottles of nail polish. All different colours and brands. Who knew a big tough tattoed, ex-military businessman wore colourful nail polish. “Sorry about the mess.”

He spoke so casually as he picked up some clothes off the floor and threw them in the direction of an ensuite. His cute simple smile was so innocent as if he hadn't just made you squirt all over his floor just minutes before. “No, No…it’s perfect.”

Your smile eased his racing mind as he kicked himself for not cleaning up before. But yet again, you being here wasn’t planned. It was supposed to go so differently. But such as life goes, nothing goes the way it’s planned every time. He chuckled lightly, walking over to your figure that stood still in the middle of the room. You weren’t standing awkwardly by any means but more so like you were admiring everything. Taking in as much detail, fearing you’d never see the inside of his mind like this ever again. His hands found their place on your hips once more, tugging you lightly towards the bed. You giggle, grabbing his face with both hands, you squished his cheeks as you kiss him messily. His smile grew against your own and as the back of your knees hit the end of the bed, you fell with him causing you both to laugh. 

“God, I could get used to this.” He murmured against your lips, crawling with you until your head hit the nice soft pillows. You just hummed in approval, letting him deepen the kiss by sliding his tongue into your mouth. You couldn’t see what he was doing, but you could feel him shifting around as if he was looking for something. You had to break away from the kiss, so he could finally see what he was doing. You tilted your head back, seeing him grab a pillow, rolling it long ways until it was like a little cinnamon roll. He lifted up your hips slightly, making you eye him in confusion as he placed the pillow under your lower back.

“w-what is that for?” You help him by planting your feet on the bed before wiggling your hips into a comfy position on the pillow. 

"It's to help me fuck you better." He said with such cheek it almost knocked the air out of your lungs. He laughed at your wide-eyed expression with a slightly parted lip. "Hah, it's so you don't feel any discomfort when I penetrate you, darling. Don't worry. I just don't want to hurt you for your first time."

"Oh god." You moaned, covering your eyes with your arm. You knew he knew you weren't experienced, but him explaining the pillow made you feel like you were having an awkward sex ed class with your much older teacher. 

"Hey, It's okay. You don't know these things, Angel." He pulled your arm away from your face lightly kissing your wrist, then forearm before kissing your cheek and the corner of your mouth. "I know you're not as experienced as me. But I want you to know, baby." He gave you a peck on the lips. "I don't care. In fact, I'm honoured you want me compared to someone younger, less...me"

You knew he was gesturing to his scars. His battle wounds and how he carries a lot of trauma and PTSD from the military. You remember your father had spoken about healing and struggling with society after being in wars. But you knew Hongjoong was on the battlefield a hell of a lot longer than your father. "Hongjoong."

You grabbed his face again, gently rubbing your thumb along his rough skin. "What you went through, what you've done. It doesn't define you now. You're such a caring, sweet, sexy, and kind man. I couldn't ask for a better person to be my first."

You've never confessed such a thing a loud before. Sure you have a big crush on the older man, but you've never actually said it to him. You were falling in love with him and you wanted him to know that. He smiled, kissing you again. It was slow, passionate, and soft. You could feel his love spilling from his heart to yours, and then he pulled away. "So you think I'm sexy."

"That's what you got out of it!!" You whacked his bare chest, making him huff out a breathy 'hey'. You went to hit him again, but he grabbed your wrist this time, pinning your arms above your head. Everything fell silent after that, his lips find your cheeks once again, littering your face with kisses. 

"I want to take you out. I want to spoil you." He kissed down your neck. "I want to call you mine and be with you without the thought of anyone judging." His kisses trail down to your collarbone, than the valley of your chest, kissing every part of skin he could. "I don't care about your father. If he doesn't approve then fuck him. I want to call you mine. If you'll let me."

He gave your nipples a suck each before kissing back up to your face, locking his lips with yours. You could feel him shuffling around, using his free hand that wasn’t holding your wrists to fondle your breast. You were becoming lost in your feelings. Mind spinning as you felt Hongjoong’s tongue dance around your own. Teeth clashing against teeth as the kisses become hotter… messier. Everything was perfect, letting you slip into complete bliss until Hongjoong panted against your swollen lips “Take a deep breath for me.”

You didn’t understand but followed his order obediently anyway. that’s when you felt his warm, wet tip slip against your hole. You quivered, whimpering at the feeling. You needed him so badly, that your mind was short-circuiting. “S-sir, please. Please. Put it in me.” 

“Fuck baby, you can't say those types of things.” He moaned, resting his head on your shoulder, his hand that was needing your breasts was now stroking his cock. He had pulled his jeans down to his thighs, making you pull your leg up to help push them further down until they started slipping off his thighs and pooling at his knees. He kissed your shoulder before sitting up fully. 

"Hong—fuck...." You gritted your teeth as you saw his cock resting against his leg. He wasn't huge, but his girth made you swallow a harsh ball of saliva. How on earth was that thing going to fit inside you? You couldn’t help but take him all in, eying his whole figure. This man was built like a god if you’d ever seen one.

“You like what you see angel?” he laughs, finally throwing his jeans somewhere in the room. you sat up, spreading your legs wider so he could get a full view of your soaked cunt. Your smile was devious and dangerous. Just like the one you put on the first night, you were both together. The brat in you was showing. He had to chuckle watching you intensely with a bitten lip as you touched yourself. Your hand inching slowly towards where you needed him most.

“I don’t know. Do you like what you see, Daddy?” 

He was back on top of you with a growl in his throat. His face inches from yours and his cock rubbing against your clit. Your eyebrows knotted together as he breached your hole, tip sitting tightly inside you. You gulp, trying your best to take a deep shaky breath. His eyes never left yours as he watched you come undone. Your mouth fell open as each inch slipped into your abused cunt. Your moans were weak, breaking into a cry as he finally bottomed out completely. “Fuck, your cunt is so tight baby. So warm. You are doing such a good girl. My best girl.”

“H-Hongjoong t-too big.” Your whimpers were high-pitched and whiny. Your bratty nature out of sight. Your fingers dug into his shoulders as you pushed against him slightly. It wasn’t that you wanted him off you by any means but your mind was racing. From feeling so full, pleasure surging through your whole body mixing with a sharp pain coming from being stretched out by his cock. And then there was the overwhelming feeling of having failed your father, letting his best friend fuck you…. But as Hongjoong kissed your tears that ran from your eyes. He whispered back to you lovingly, tenderly.

“It’s okay princess. You are doing so well. Keep taking deep breaths for me. Relax.” What he really wanted to say was how fucking tight you were. How good you felt around him. How he wanted to bust a nut right then and there. “C-can I move..fuck…” His pants became more frantic as you nodded your head with a little ‘please’. his hands that rested on either side of your head, now one rested on your hip and the other behind your neck, holding you in place. Your legs wrapped themselves tightly around his waist, letting him thrust slowly and deeply into your wet pussy.

His nose rubbed against yours, while his mouth left agape mere inches from your own. Your breath mixed with his with each pant and battered breath. Your eyes had snapped shut, focusing solely on his cock inside you alone. Hongjoong felt like he was on cloud nine, the way you moaned his name. Hugged him tightly. The way your body needed him just as he needed yours. Everything was just as he imagined if not more. His little angel. His sweet best friend's daughter. “Fuck, angel. You feel so good. My dirty little girl.”

“D-dirty?!” You gasped as his hand left your hip to push the pillow up more so he could fuck you deeper. His chuckle felt cold, chilling and oh-so-pleasurable. 

“Hmmm yes, my dirty...” He tilted against your ear grunting with each thrust. “little cocksleeve. So tight and warm for me, fuck.” You whimpered at his filthy words, digging your nails into his skin, fearing to draw some blood as his thrusts got sharper. Hongjoong didn’t mean to slip up with his rambles but he couldn’t help it. It just felt so right. And you felt the same.

“Yes, daddy. Please. H-Harder please.” You gasped throwing your head back. Hongjoong sat up this time, hooking your right leg over his shoulder, chuckling darkly. Your smile grew feeling his cock sink deeper inside you. He held onto your plump thigh for deal life as he humps his cock into your pussy, grunting at the feeling of your walls spasming around him. He swallowed in a sharp breath, snapping his eyes shut with a loud hiss going blind by the tight feeling of your squeezing cunt. 

“Fuck, baby. How did I wait this long to fuck this tight cunt? I should have fucked you the night we screwed around.” He lent down bending your body at an odd angle but the burn made your head spin in the best way possible. He cupped your chin, pulling your focus back to him, staring into his hot, lust-filled eyes. “You would have liked that huh darling? Me fucking you while your father is in the next room.”

“Jesus fucking christ.” You snapped, yelling at you felt the tingle in your gut grow quicker. “Yes, Joong. I wanted you to fuck me then and there so so badly.”

“Ha, See you are a dirty girl. I should punish you. Maybe I’ll wake you up tomorrow to eating this deilous pussy until your screaming me to stop.”

“Yes, Yes Yes. Please.” You babbled, squeezing tightly around him. You were so close to the edge, and Hongjoong could tell. By the way your face scrunched and how your legs started to shake. He knew you just needed a little push.

“You gonna cum baby? Come on, let go. I wanna feel you cum around my cock darling.” He growled in your ear, moving your leg back around his waist so he could move closer to you. Your lips found his against in a heated moment. Passion spilling out with each thrust as he swallowed your moans.

“Joongie please come with me. Come inside me. I wanna feel you.” You mumbled against his mouth, making him let out a groan. His stomach tightened as he tried to hold on just for a little longer. He needed to feel you come first. He needed to feel you as you tightened around him. As your eyes rolled back and you finally let go. You swore over and over again as felt him empty his load deep inside you. Your scent mixing with his as his groans harmonized with yours. 

“God, I love you.” His hips stuttered before stopping entirely. Your heart was thumping so hard against your chest that you could hear it in your ears. Hongjoong was the same, panting like he had just run a marathon. He kissed your cheeks, then your jaw and lips, littering your face in soft pecks. The silence that consumed the room suddenly felt comforting, like a blanket you’d wrap around yourself on a cold day.

You could feel Hongjoong slowly soften inside you, but didn’t pull out. Your fingers raked through his hair, scratching his scalp. You couldn’t have sworn he was purring for a second. “H-Hongjoong.”

“Yes, dear?” He hummed so casually like this was just a normal night shared with a lover.

“I-I think I love you too.” You whispered unsure if it was the right thing to say. He had blurted out the words of devotion in the heat of the moment and it worried you that he might not have meant it. But it was in fact the opposite. He had to constantly bite his tongue so he wouldn’t say it. And in the moment it felt right. His smile grew, sitting on his elbows so he could see your sweaty, beautiful face, dancing in afterglow.

“I’m glad. Cause I mean it. I’m foolishly in love with you.” He tried to act dramatic which caused you to hit his chest lightly. He sat up with that action finally pulling out of you. You shivered as he did it, feeling his cum slowly slip out of you. “Sorry about…that. I should have put a condom on.” 

He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling embarrassed that he, a supposably mature man, couldn’t control himself. You sat up slowly, reaching for his bicep before rubbing him lovingly “Hey, it's okay. I asked for it. And I’m on birth control so it's fine.”

“Well in that case.” He smirked pulling you onto his lap. You hissed slightly at your sore limbs and overly sensitive sex. His arms wrapped around your waist, letting your chest rest flushed against his.

“Now now soldier. I think definitely cannot go another round without some rest.” You laughed peppering his cheek slowly. He hummed knowing you needed rest and a part of you knew he was half joking about going another round…

“shower and sleep.” He mumbled against the crook of your neck, feeling his fingers draw shapes into your back. You sighed feeling so much contentment. Safe in his arms. You both knew that what had now happened was something forbidden, and you both were going to have to confront your father at some point.

But as Hongjoong helped you to the bathroom and slowly lathered you with body wash that smelt like him with giggles and laughter echoing in the spacious shower room. Neither of you cared for the outside world. Not when Hongjoong's lips brushed against you every so often as you rinse the soap off your body. Not when he put you in one of his shirts and dragged you back to bed with his fingers tangled with yours. 

And not when he held you tightly, whispering how beautiful you are. How lucky he is and now he was never going to ever let you go.

-♡

[merrybloomwrites]

Been Here for Days

Summary: You never thought about the dangers of dating a celebrity. But when you get taken by a man who's after Harry's money you're faced with the jarring reality that you're not as safe as you thought.

Word Count: 3.7K

CW: kidnapping, drugs, violence, attempted sa, hospitals

AN: I've read a few mafia AU stories where reader gets kidnapped because of Harry's dark world. So it gave me the idea for a non-AU story in which the reader gets kidnapped, simply for being the partner of a famous and wealthy popstar. I've had this partially written for a while but it seemed fitting to include in Whumptober so I finally finished it up.

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Dating Harry Styles came with a certain level of attention. This wasn’t a surprise to you, and you learned how to deal with it fairly quickly. Harry also did a lot to protect you and try to keep you out of the public eye as much as possible. 

Whenever he did get overprotective you’d remind him that it’s okay, you knew what you signed up for. But he always reiterated that his personal life should be private, and he didn’t want people trying to get more information about the two of you than he chooses to share.

One thing that’s obvious is that no one really cares about you. Not as an individual. They care that you’re Harry’s girlfriend. There’s not a doubt in your mind that if the two of you ever broke up, you’d never have photos posted of you again. 

And you’re fine with that too. It doesn’t bother you that you’re just seen as the girlfriend, mainly because it means people don’t care to go digging and finding facts about your life. Your family has been left alone for the most part, and you can still go out alone without being bothered.

Occasionally an individual will show deep interest in you, and you’ll find a social media account dedicated to you. Sometimes it’s a fan page, sometimes it’s a hate page. You let them be, since they’re still only posting things that are already released to the public. Even these ‘more enthusiastic’ people aren’t really crossing boundaries, since they’re not trying to find private photos or follow you to get photos of their own. 

Or so you thought.

Since spring began, and the weather turned nice, you’ve been making sure to walk to work each day. Ironically, you’d gotten a job in a local bakery. You wanted a steady job of your own while Harry isn’t touring, and this seemed like a perfect choice. You love getting up early to bake and decorate what’s needed for the day. It’s calm, and therapeutic. You mostly work in the back, doing the actual baking, but occasionally you fill in up front at the register. 

Each morning you walk to work as the sun is just rising, and you get home by early afternoon. This gives you time to run errands, do some chores around the house, or just take some time to relax before Harry gets home. He’s been working more in the studio recently, but still makes it a point to get back by 5PM in order to spend a couple of hours with you every day.

You cook a meal together, talk about your days, and often put on a movie and cuddle. It’s the simple things that bring the two of you joy, just getting to end your days together. 

You wake up on Monday morning, and it starts just like the rest. You get dressed, kiss the cheek of a still sleeping Harry, and begin your walk. You have an odd feeling, but you can’t quite pinpoint what it is. You were up a bit later than usual the night before, enjoying some adult activities with Harry, so maybe you’re just a bit tired.

The same feeling is there on the way home. But you’d had a tough day at work with someone calling out, leaving you to try and continue baking while also working the register. 

This feeling continues the whole week, and you continue to make excuses as to why you’re so anxious during your commute each day. But when the next week is the same, you begin to grow wary. Finally, on Thursday of the second week you realize that it feels as though you’re being followed. This thought does freak you out, and you plan to talk to Harry that night at home.

But you don’t make it home.

The weather on your walk back to the house is perfect, if not even a little warm. But you don’t feel it. You feel chilled, and nervous, and you’re glancing over your shoulder every two seconds. You’re mad at yourself, berating yourself for not calling Harry to have him pick you up. You’d convinced yourself it would be fine, and you didn’t want to bother him. But now as you walk alone, sensing another person might be following you, that logic seems incredibly stupid. 

As you’re pulling out your phone to call Harry you hear a noise in the bush next to you. Instinctively, you turn towards the sound. Everything happens so quickly, yet as though it’s in slow motion. A man rushes at you, covering your mouth so you can’t scream and using his other arm to keep you still. 

You try to fight back, but he’s bigger, stronger. Despite your best efforts, he still manages to get a needle into you. At first you feel the pinch of the needle, and then you feel nothing at all, and your world goes black. 

When you wake up, you’re disoriented. You’re in a bed, and while it’s comfy, it’s not your own. The bedroom you’re in is completely unrecognizable. Slowly, your memories come back. There was a man. Who’d probably been following you for weeks, tracking your schedule, and he’s now taken you. 

And not to some basement, or a warehouse or something creepy that you’d see in movies. No, he took you to his home. To a bed. And that feels even worse. You quickly assess your body, and are relieved to find that you’re still in your same clothes, and all you can feel are a couple minor scrapes and bruises, likely from trying to fight the man. 

There’s a window in the room so you get up and peek out. It’s dark, indicating a lot of time has passed. You can’t see anything outside, no other houses, and hope it’s just because of how dark it is. Because the idea that there’s nothing nearby is causing you to panic even more than you already are. 

You check the door, but of course it’s locked from the outside. The window won’t open either. You’re trapped. 

There is a bathroom attached to the bedroom, but no way to escape from there either. It does mean you can take a sip of water and splash some water on your face which helps calm you briefly. 

Taking deep breaths you begin to pace. Your mind spins, trying to come up with escape scenarios, and hoping that someone is figuring out where you are so they can come get you. The sky turns pink outside and you check your surroundings again. 

There’s nothing but a large open field. No biggie. Maybe there’s civilization out the front of the house. There’s no way you’re locked in a house with a crazy person out in the middle of nowhere. 

Tears spring to your eyes but you refuse to let them fall. There’s got to be a way out of here. A way back home. A way to Harry. 

You’re left alone for what feels like hours. You’re a little hungry, but that’s the least of your concerns at the moment. 

Finally, the door opens. You stand your ground in the middle of the room, not wanting to back yourself into a corner for whatever is about to happen. 

Taking a deep breath, you stand up straight, not showing any weakness to the person who took you. 

“Well good morning sweetheart,” he says. The pleasantries, the nickname, it’s all nauseating to you, but you keep your expression unreadable. 

“My name is Roy. I’ve been watching you and your boyfriend. You make a very cute little couple.”

“What do you want with me?” You ask, ignoring how violated you feel at the confirmation that this strange man has been following you. 

“Isn’t it obvious? Money. I want money. Harry seems to be quite devoted to you. I bet he’ll pay anything to get you back.” 

And it is obvious, really. It shouldn’t come as a surprise at all that people would want Harry’s money. But you never expected anyone to literally kidnap you for it. 

“Don’t worry though, I’ll make sure you have food and water and a safe place to stay. Might rough you up a bit, maybe have some fun,” he says as he steps forward and runs a finger along your cheek, causing you to recoil and bump into the bed behind you. 

He laughs at that, seeming to enjoy your discomfort, and then adds, “Of course that may be some good incentive for your boyfriend. I’m sure he’d hate to see anything bad happen to you.”

Your fear amps up a notch hearing this but you keep your emotions off of your face. You’re determined to stay strong throughout this whole ordeal. This man does not get to overpower you, doesn’t get to see you break like you’re sure he wants. 

He steps back a moment later and says, “Just need a quick picture, you know proof of life, proof I have you, all that.” Before you can register what he’s saying he takes out an old camera and takes your picture, the flash stunning you. 

“I brought you a sandwich and some water. It’s all sealed so you know I haven’t done anything to it. Wouldn’t want you starving yourself or dehydrating,” he says as he hands you the items. You take them, confirming they are in fact unopened. 

“Eat. I’ll be back later,” he says before stepping out of the room. You hear the definitive click of the lock but you still double check, just in case it’s open. 

Of course it isn’t, but you had to try. After examining the food to confirm it hasn’t been tampered with you take a tentative bite. It’s good, and that first bite kick starts your appetite so you quickly eat the rest. 

Roy comes back hours later to drop off dinner. He again leaves you alone to eat, and you’re starting to get lulled into a false sense of security. You think that maybe it won’t be so bad. If he’s just after money, then he might just leave you alone and then he’ll get paid and you’ll be home. 

But of course it can’t be that simple. 

Later that evening he comes back in.

“I’m bored,” he says. Just two words shouldn’t be so bone chilling, but you understand the implication. He’s bored and you’re at his mercy. He’s already drugged and kidnapped you. There’s not telling what else he’s capable of. 

By the time he leaves again you're bruised, and there’s blood running from your split lip. He’d thrown you around, hit you hard enough to send you to the ground where he kicked you repeatedly. It was terrifying and painful. 

But you admit to yourself that it could’ve been worse. You somehow convince yourself that it wasn’t so bad, that you’ll recover quickly once you get home.

After another day and a half with Roy, you’re doubting that will happen. You’re doubting you’ll recover. You’re doubting that you’ll get home. The situation has turned from terrible to terrifying. 

You’ve spent three nights in this room, including the one you were mostly unconscious for. Roy’s violence has grown, and now he seems to be changing plans again. 

“These bruises look lovely on you,” he says. It’s creepy as fuck, and indicates that whatever happens next will be awful. 

“While the violence has been fun, there are other ways to bruise your skin. I think I’ll do that today instead.”

After days of beatings you’re too tired to fight back. You lay there crying as he climbs on top of you and pins you down. His mouth goes to your neck and he begins to suck a mark there. Bile rises in your throat and it takes everything in you not to vomit at the feeling of him so close to you, touching you in this way. 

You’re wondering how you’re going to survive what’s sure to come next when there’s a noise. Suddenly the door slams open and nearly a dozen people enter the room. At first you’re terrified that they’re here to hurt you as well, but then Roy is pulled off of you and handcuffed and you realize that they’re police officers there to save you. 

One comes and talks to you, reassures you that everything is going to be okay, but still, you’re scared. It’s too much. Too much noise, and commotion, and people. You’re overwhelmed.

And then one more person enters the room. He looks different, more frazzled with a longer beard than you’ve ever seen. But as he crouches beside the bed and holds your hand between his, there’s no denying that Harry is here. 

There’s a darkness that’s been pulling at you for a while, and now that Harry’s here and you’re safe, you finally let it pull you under. 

You wake up in an uncomfortable bed wearing an itchy gown. There are bandages wrapped on various parts of your body and tubes and wires attached to you. Everything is still hazy, but you know there’s a hand holding yours. 

You quickly and clumsily pull away, not wanting anyone to touch you right now. 

Slowly the world around you refocuses, and you realize the person next to you is Harry. As much as you want his comfort, you can’t bear to have anyone’s skin touching yours. Not when it only makes you think of Roy and what he did. And what he was planning to do. 

Over the next few hours people come and go from your room. Nurses, doctors, detectives, all sharing information and asking you questions. 

But you say nothing. You don’t respond. You lay there, watching with a blank expression. Someone brings in food for dinner, and you eat just enough to make them happy before pushing away the tray and curling further into your blankets. 

The next day is much the same. They bring in a trauma counselor and though she’s a kind woman, you still say nothing. 

And it’s not that you’re upset with, or mad at these people. They’ve done nothing to you. But there’s this block in your mind right now. You’re so exhausted from the whole ordeal that it’s taking everything in you just to eat food and drink water and get yourself to and from the bathroom. 

Another two days pass and your doctor is in the room talking to Harry. He tried speaking to you but still you’re unable to find your voice. 

“Medically, she’s well enough to go home,” the doctor says. “Her injuries are healing well enough that I’m ready to discharge her.” 

You perk up a bit at this news. You miss home, miss the big comfy bed with the big windows. You miss your garden, and how peaceful it is. Hearing that you might be able to go back to your house with Harry has you more alert than you’ve been in days.

But then the doctor adds, “However, I’m concerned by her mental state. She still hasn’t said anything, and she barely lets anyone touch her. It’s important that her bandages get changed regularly and I’m worried that she won’t allow you to help with that. So until that changes she’ll have to stay here.”

Your heart drops at that. The despair you feel has you finally breaking through and suddenly you say, “No. Home.”

They both look at you and Harry quickly moves to the side of your bed. 

“What was that, baby?” he asks. He looks hopeful and you know that he’s just happy to hear you speak again.

“Home. Please,” you state. It’s hard to talk, full sentences being something you can’t do yet. But you get your point across and Harry looks at the doctor to see what he has to say about this advancement. 

Your doctor comes closer as well and asks, “Will you be okay with Harry helping you at home? He’ll have to touch you to properly clean and bandage your wounds.”

You nod, but you know that alone won’t convince them. Even though it takes a lot of courage to do this, you reach out your hand and grab Harry’s. He gasps at the contact and quickly laces your fingers with his. It feels foreign, and you hate that you no longer feel comfortable holding hands with the person who used to be your safe place. 

Apparently that was the right move, though, because you’re discharged by the end of the day. You get wheeled out, and Harry helps you get from the chair into the car that’s there for you. There’s still an overwhelming part of you that wants to flinch away from his touch, but you tell yourself that he needs this. He needs to be able to help you. 

On the drive, Harry informs you of the updated security the two of you will have. It’s weird to know that there will be people watching the house at all times, but you admit to yourself that it makes you feel better. 

Once you’re finally home you breathe a sigh of relief. And then you get to your room and the exhaustion hits again. 

You sit down on the bed and Harry moves through the house, doing all kinds of things that he thinks will help you. His nervousness is obvious, and you want to tell him you’re okay, that he should relax.

When he focuses on you again he asks, “What can I get for you? What do you need?”

“Bed.” 

“You’re tired? You want to get ready for bed?”

“Yes.” 

“Okay, we can do that. Let me get you some clothes and then we can go brush our teeth together. And I’ll bring up some water and maybe some food in case you wake up hungry since you didn’t eat too much dinner before we left the hospital,” he rambles. It seems that he’s trying to make up for your lack of words by speaking more than usual. 

Harry grabs the clothes and walks over to you. It’s clear that he’s about to help you up and so you quickly stand and walk to the bathroom before he has the chance to touch you. You hate seeing the pain in his eyes at your rejection, but you’re just not ready yet. 

After getting ready you climb into bed. It’s so soft, so comfortable, and so familiar that you quickly fall asleep. 

You wake up with a jolt, your heart racing as the images of your dream race through your mind. The worst part is that it’s not just a made up nightmare, but the memories of the nightmare you actually lived. 

“What’s wrong?” Harry asks and he reaches out a hand to comfort you. He quickly pulls it back when he sees the way you eye it with fear and trepidation. 

“I can go,” he says. “If you’re uncomfortable with me in the bed I can stay in the next room.”

Immediately you panic at the thought of him going anywhere. “No. Stay. Please. Just, don’t touch,” you reply.

He nods and the two of you sit there in bed next to each other. You begin to cry and Harry fights back tears of his own. 

After a few minutes Harry says, “They wouldn’t let me pay the ransom.”

You turn to him, confused for a moment. And then you realize that he’s explaining why it took so long to get you out. 

“When I got the message from…him. I showed it to the detectives who were here and told them I’d pay immediately so I could get you back. But they wouldn’t let me. Said it would set a precedent and put you in even more danger. Make you a target. That if I listened to this crazy person’s demands and gave him what he wanted, more people might try to take you to get money as well. I hated knowing that they were right. That I couldn’t do the one thing in my power to help you without making life riskier for you. And I hated that you being with me put you in that position in the first place. Y/N, I am so sorry that this happened to you, that it happened because of me.” 

His voice breaks and you sit for another moment absorbing what he’d just said. You didn’t realize before, but now you know that you were mad at him. You were mad that it took so long for them to get you. But everything he said makes sense to you.

And as horrible as the experience was for you, it was awful for him as well. He looks just as exhausted as you are, and though he didn’t deal with the pain and terror that you did, he spent days filled with anxiety and fear and guilt. 

You lay down on your back, looking up and trying to silently send him a message. Once he understands he lays down as well. Slowly, one inch at a time, you shift closer to him. Finally, you turn and lay your hand on his chest. He brings up his hand and places it gently on top of yours.

The touch no longer feels foreign to you. It finally feels comforting again. Building up courage, you move again, lifting your head until you can place it on his chest. This time he doesn’t hesitate, but quickly wraps his free arm around your shoulders, holding you close to him.

For a moment you panic, feeling trapped by him. But then you take a deep breath, inhaling Harry’s distinct smell, and you relax into his hold. 

“I forgive you,” you say quietly. Harry lets out a sob and you squeeze his hand reassuringly. After a moment he controls his tears and regulates his breathing. 

“I love you. So much,” he says.

“I love you too,” you reply.

You know that this isn’t the end. There’s a long road of recovery ahead of you. But being able to lean on Harry, to trust him fully again, you know that you’re going to be okay. He’s going to be there, he’ll help you on the bad days and celebrate the good. 

He begins to quietly sing, filling the room with his familiar and comforting voice. He lulls you back to sleep, but stays up for a while just watching you, reveling in the feeling of having you back in his arms, home where you belong. Safe and sound once again.

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AN: Thank you for reading!

[drewsprincessy]

loving you was hard.

warnings: angst, anxiety, anger, comfort, arguing, crying, lmk if i missed any

summary: rafe and reader are in love, but rafe struggles to accept it, he doesnt believe in love.

part one

rafe cameron x female reader.

you had fallen for rafe, hard. it started off with stealing glances at each other every so often, then it escalated to him asking for your number. you two talked every night, dusk til dawn until you couldn't keep your eyes open anymore. you were the only person he was gentle with, the only one he would give affection to, and even crack a smile with.

he caught himself re-reading your texts and smiling at them, going through your insta posts, checking your following, checking your location, and checking when you were last online.

he thought he just needed a quick hookup, and that was all. but no. the way you smile at him and your dimple pokes through your cheek, or maybe its the way your eyes light up when your excited about something.

he doesnt know what it is, but he cant fall in love. your not important, its just all in his head.

he was sitting on the edge of his bed, his head in his hands as he thinks, he regains his composure, shaking his head to try and get rid of the thought. he lets out a long breath, and he stands up. he goes to smoke some weed.

he stops answering your calls, and even stops responding all together. he cant fall in love, he's not fit for a relationship. right?

your a mess. you'd be lying if you said it didn't hurt the way that he ghosted you out of nowhere. but i mean you cant be mad, because your still just a hookup for him. right?

i mean you thought it'd be different because hes never met up with a girl more than once, you guys have even been on real dates. not just the ones where you have sex and not talk for another 2 weeks. you two had gotten to really know each other.

you were just confused, and hurt. you decided you were gonna try to let it go. try and move on, because theres always other men out there.

~

2 weeks pass

you were at home laying in your bed, you just had on a comfy tee shirt, and some yoga shorts.

you had been scrolling thru your phone, giggling at a video you seen on tiktok. you clicked on the comments and scrolled thru them, and you were giggling until a message popped up at the top of your screen. from rafe; your smile faintly drops as you click on the message

-

imessage:

rafe: been thinking about you. um, im really sorry for ditchin you n' shit. i just been going thru stuff and didnt wanna take it out on you. im sorry alright?

y/n: its okay rafe, i understand. call if you need anything. okay?

you were so understanding, and forgiving. even with the half ass apology he gave you, you still forgave him.

-

over the next few weeks, you and rafe start going out again, he fell more and more in love with you, and you felt the same about him. he had enough of it. he couldnt be falling for you.

he was high off drugs, and his breath reeked of alcohol. he was stumbling and could barely walk. there were crowds of people around him at the party he attended to.

you had also been there with rafe, but went off somewhere with kiara and sarah. you decided the topic of conversation was boring, and excused yourself with a "ill be right back." and went to find him.

he had went off into a room with some random chick, they were making out and her clothes were half off. you had almost stumbled on your feet when you walked in, your eyes had immediately began brimming with tears. to save yourself the embarrassment you walk off, quickly as possible. trying to get the hell out of there.

rafe comes outside to where you had walked off to, he immediately catches up to you since his legs were longer, and grabs your arm "whats your problem..why are you crying?" he says, trying not to slur his words

you decide, fuck it. he doesnt care anyway. "your my problem rafe. i fucking love you, i have for a long time. and you lead me on and act like you love me the same way, but then i find you about to hookup with some random girl, that you dont even know! like i dont even exist rafe, and im gonna be honest. that shit HURTS! im so sick of this, im sick of you, and your bullshit excuses, your half ass apologies. FUCK YOU!"

rafe feels a pang of guilt in his chest, even thru the alcohol and drugs. he still manages to muster up some excuse, hes trying to hide the way he feels. "i mean..y/n. what did you expect? i told you what the hell u were gettin into. i dont gain.. feelings. so quit being a damn crybaby"

it starts to rain, and you storm off, even when he yells your name, telling u to come back you dont listen. you kick your heels off, and walk all the way home in the pouring rain.

once u get home, you delete his number, and cry yourself to sleep.

he tries to act as if he doesnt care, he drinks until he passes out.

~

𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓮𝓷𝓭

[lovecla]

TAKE YOUR PAIN AWAY | quinn hughes.

chapter eleven:

<last chapter> <next chapter>

➴ chapter warnings: mentions of losing weight, mentions of drug use, mentions of toxic family and sad thoughts, hurt/comfort.

➴ word count: 3.1k

💌 from me to you: and, somehow, the world starts spinning again for our little madison. thank u all for reading and i promise, no more tears from now on!

౨ৎ

2024, JUNE.

“MADISON, RELAX your shoulders and give me a soft smile. Let your eyes do the talking, imagine you're sharing a secret.”

You do as the photographer— you didn’t bother to learn his name— says, posting for what felt like the hundredth time that evening.

Going to work now felt more like a chore than something you actually enjoyed doing, and you hated every second. People constantly looking at your body and talking about it made you feel terrible, your mom’s harsh words still wandering around your head like one would do at a park.

The medicine bottle sitting heavy inside your purse, just the thought of it making its purpose work: all your hunger vanished, leaving you with a pounding headache and tears in your eyes.

Your semi-fight with your mom happened exactly three weeks ago, basically when you’d just arrived from Newark, and everyday for three weeks straight you have been swallowing these pills, once a day like clockwork.

No one beside your mom knew, and you would like to keep it that way. It was already enough to have the tabloids talking about your body all the time, and you’d much rather keep all of this to yourself than to share it with the whole world.

People would know about how shitty your life actually is, and then it’d be over.

Quinn would know the truth about you.

The last time you saw Quinn was also three weeks ago, and God knows how much it hurts you to say this. You wanted nothing more than to be near him, kissing his lips and drowning in his hugs. You are now sure that Quinn Hughes is the love of your life and no one would ever be like him.

And it hurt whenever you had to turn down one of his invites, or when he called you and you gave him excuse after excuse for not picking up.

But you didn’t want to drag him into this mess that you called life. You didn’t want your mom to see you together and end up doing something to him or his family, because your dad’s still a powerful man inside the NHL, and you knew your mom had her way of getting things done.

And you would never do something like that to him. Or his brothers, for that matter. You loved them way too much and sometimes, loving also means letting go.

“That’s perfect, Mads. I think we’re good to go,” the man smiles, raising his camera for the last time before nodding at you, releasing you from posing, like you’d been doing for the past four hours straight.

“Thank you,” you breathe, leaving the room so you could change into something more comfortable and go home quickly, because you missed Bella a lot and wanted nothing more than to cuddle with her.

As you put on some sweatpants and a sweatshirt, you thought about how much your life changed in such a small amount of time. It was summer now, the days were getting longer, and what was supposed to be your favorite season, turned into your least favorite one. You watched as people walked around the city with smiles on their faces, hands intertwined with their significant others, laughing at everything, and you couldn’t help but feel jealous of them.

Jealous of people and their normal lives and normal relationships. Jealous of the daughters who have loving parents, and of the sisters who have real brothers. Jealous of people who have never looked at a mirror and hated what they saw.

And feeling like that, all day, everyday, was tiring. Exhausting, even. You felt like the worst person to ever exist, because you had everything a girl could want, yet still, at the end of the day, you’d always end up crying alone in your bedroom, silently so Bella wouldn’t notice.

“Bye, guys, have a nice weekend,” you wish to the workers, receiving a bunch of smiles and “you too” as you walk past them. You were so glad Victoria was away for Buenos Aires’ fashion week, because that way you didn’t have to explain to her why you never ate lunch anymore.

You walked towards the front of the building, waiting for the driver to come pick you up, since you didn’t bother getting a car.

“Thought I’d never see you again,” Quinn’s cologne reaches your nose before his voice reaches your ear, making you freeze in place, not daring to turn around. “Madison.”

You could hear his steps getting closer, and you mentally curse the driver for not being punctual, ever.

“Madison.” He calls you again, making you finally look at him, losing all your breath in the process.

Quinn looked unreal. He had a faint summer tan on his cheeks, his blue eyes so blue that they reminded you of the ocean. His white, dress shirt had the sleeves rolled up and the first two buttons open, and he wore a silver chain around his neck. His hair looking fluffy and long, the curls finally making their comeback after an entire season hidden behind his helmet.

“Quinn,” you hear yourself say, licking your dry lips afterwards. Saying his name out loud after weeks felt weird, and it reminded you of the seven years you spent without even thinking of saying it out loud. “What… what are you doing here?”

“I came to check on you, since you don’t reply to my texts or calls anymore, and the only thing I got from your apartment was Bella’s howls.” He puts his hands inside his pockets.

“You went to my house?” You ask, shaking your head. “What if someone saw you? Or worse, what if someone saw you and snapped a picture of you there? What were you going to do?”

He frowns, the sight of it making your heart hurt. “What do you mean? People have seen us together before and it didn’t bother you. Why are you bringing this up now?”

You were about to answer, when Christian, your driver who looked old enough to be your grandad, beeped, parking in front of La Vie en Rose’s building.

“I have to go—”

“You’re not running away again, Madison,” he hisses, walking towards the expensive vehicle. “She’s coming home with me. You can go now.”

“Quinn—”

“Yeah, she’ll be fine, promise. Have a nice weekend.” He smiles at the driver, and you watch as Christian nods at you and drives away, leaving you alone on the sidewalk with Quinn. “You should probably ask for a new driver, this one would watch you get kidnapped and not do anything.”

“You’re crazy,” you whisper, stepping back. “I’m not going anywhere with you, Quinn, people will—”

Quinn interrupts you, stepping closer and standing toe to toe with you. He looks down, staring at you with dark eyes. “I don’t care about them, and you already know it. I care about you. So you either tell me the reason for all of this, or I swear, baby, I’m not leaving you alone ever again.”

I don’t want you to, you yell at him inside your head, fighting back the stupid, stubborn tears who fell down more and more lately. I don’t want you to ever leave me alone. I want you to stay with me until our time is up, and then some more after that.

“I’m not having this conversation with you on the sidewalk,” you give in, knowing it was better this way. Rip off the bandage at once.

“It’s alright. I know the way to your house.” He smirks before turning around, waiting for you to be by his side so he could walk you both to his car.

The drive had been silent, the only sounds coming from Quinn’s expensive radio, some playful, pop song playing in the background. You stare at the view in front of you, realising that Vancouver’s traffic is always the worst at night; but at least it gave you extra time to think about how you were going to tell him that you couldn’t see him again.

You made up at least thirty scenarios in your head, and all of them ended entirely wrong. It was like you were reliving that day in September, seven years ago, when you saw Quinn for the last time before he moved.

You opened the door for him, watching as Bella jumped on Quinn like he was her Lord and Savior, licking his hands and barking at him, asking for nose boops as she always did whenever she saw him.

“Hey, cutie, I missed you too,” he whispered to her, as you placed your purse on the coffee table and watched the two of them together.

As Quinn pats Bella’s tummy, you feel your heart shrinking inside your chest, so small it could be compared to a pea.

I’m going to lose all of this forever, you remind yourself, feeling sick to your stomach.

Lost in thoughts, you didn’t notice that Quinn had stopped caressing Bella’s fur and was now standing in front of you, leaning against your wall.

“You lost weight.”

His statement takes you by surprise, making you arch your brows. “Yeah, I did.”

“Are you eating enough?”

“I— why are you asking me this?” you frown. “You never asked questions about my body before.”

“Because I didn’t feel the need to. But it’s clear that you have lost a decent amount of weight in a short period of time.”

“Three weeks isn’t a short period of time, Quinn,” you roll your eyes.

He crosses his arms in front of his chest. “You can’t be serious, Maddie.”

You sigh, choosing to remove the band-aid at once. It was better to hurt him once, than continue to hurt him again and again with your actions. “Quinn, we can’t— we can’t keep seeing each other like this.”

It was like he lost all of his emotions in a second.

“What do you mean?”

“It won’t do us any good. I’m leaving Vancouver in three months and it’s better if we stop seeing each other now than later.” You try getting away from him, only to feel his hand gently grab your arm over your sweatshirt. “Quinn—”

“No, Madison, you won’t say shit like that and then run away. You’re going to explain what happened to me, now.”

“I can’t—”

“Was it Luke? Was it someone at Jack’s party?” He asks, blue eyes making you regret all of your life choices. “Did someone, anyone, tell you anything? Maddie, talk to me, for God’s sake!”

“What difference would it make, Quinn, tell me?” you laugh, not finding anything funny at all. “We can’t be together. I’m leaving, which part of that didn’t you understand—”

“I’m not fucking losing you again, Madison,” he says through his teeth, tightening his hold on your arm. “You’ll have to say to my face that you don’t want me anymore to make me leave.”

“Don’t make this harder than it already is,” you plead, trying to free yourself from his hold. Unsuccessful. “Quinn, please.”

“It doesn’t have to be hard, baby, just tell me what’s wrong, and I’ll try to make it right,” he says, voice so soft you almost felt like he was telling the truth.

“You can’t do anything about the problem if the problem’s me.”

Your eyes were stinging, and you finally got yourself out of his hold. Quinn’s face portrayed the most beautiful shade of pain, and you wanted nothing more than to yank it out of his face.

“Maddie—”

“I don’t know how it took you so long to realize this, but it’s the truth,” you sob, covering your eyes with your hands. “I’m not the kind, good person you think I am, and I don’t think I’ve ever been one.”

He shakes his head, ready to interrupt, only for you to start talking again.

“I only hurt the ones I–” you swallowed dry, once again confirming that Luke was right. “I only hurt the people I love, and I won’t do that with you or your brothers too.”

“Baby, what are you talking about?” He steps closer to you, knocking your purse on his way to you.

And you watch it all unfold in front of you, everything happening in slow motion— your things scattered on the floor, the pill bottle comically rolling around until it stopped at Quinn’s feet. You watch as he bends down, grabbing the half empty bottle carefully before reading its label. The realization on his face when he connected the dots.

And you’re sure that, as long as you live, you’ll never forget the devastated way he looked at you. You’ll never forget how his eyes, so shiny earlier that night, turned into a shade of blue so dark it was almost black.

“Madison,” he whispers, holding the little orange bottle tightly between his fingers. “What… what are you… why do you have this?”

“I– I need it,” you stutter, fidgeting with your fingers, the turmoil inside you growing like waves did during a storm. “Quinn—”

“This is how you lost all that weight so fast,” he mumbles, looking at the bottle again. “Are you taking these?”

“Quinn, it wasn’t my first choice, I swear—“

“What are you doing to yourself, Madison?” He looks at you again, and you can see that his eyes are starting to get wet, just like yours. And you hated yourself for making him cry. “What have you been doing to yourself all these years?”

You once asked yourself the same thing, but when you couldn’t find an answer, you just gave up. It wasn’t that serious anyway.

But it seems like that for Quinn, it was.

“This isn’t okay, Madison, why the hell would you do this?”

You looked at the floor, feeling a new wave of tears forming in your eyes.

You were so tired.

“I don’t have to explain it to you,” you chuckle, not bothering to wipe your tears. It’d be pointless. “Someone like you would never understand why I did this.”

“Someone like me? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” He spats, throwing the bottle on the floor, the sound of it making you flinch.

“Someone who always had people who loved you for what you are!” You yell, finally giving Quinn what he wanted: an answer. “Someone who grew up with parents who loved each other, someone who has two brothers who would die and kill for you without asking for anything back!”

“Madison—”

“No, Quinn, now you’ll have to listen to me. Isn’t that what you wanted?” You scoff, pacing around the room. “My family hates me. My brother hasn’t spoken to me in ages, my dad doesn’t even care if I’m alive or not and my mom—” you gasp, trying to even your breathing. “My mom was the one who gave me those pills. She said I’d make her so happy and proud if I took those things and I did, because I wanted her to finally feel something for me that isn’t just disgust!”

Your head was pounding and your body reminded you that the last time you had eaten something had been more than twelve hours ago.

“I wanted her to finally love me, I wanted someone to see that I’m fucking trying, but I’m so tired, Quinn,” you lowered your voice, hiding your face between your hands. “I’m so tired of feeling tired all the time, I’m tired of feeling like what I do isn’t enough, and I’m tired of starving myself just to have people to look at me the way they do,” you sniff, hating yourself for breaking out like this in front of him. But what else could you do? “I’m tired of those fucking pills. I can’t stand them anymore. I promised my mom that I’d go to her gala next week, and that I’d be perfect for her but I’m so. Fucking. Tired.”

You could hear Quinn’s steps around the living room and you felt yourself panicking, your mind tricking you, like it often did, making you think that he was going to leave. But as soon as you felt his strong, warm arms around you, hugging you tight, you were reminded of why you loved him so much.

You cried in his arms, hugging him back like your life depended on it. Because, at the moment, it felt like it did.

“Shh, sh, it’s okay, baby,” he softly says, placing your head on his chest, gently brushing your hair with his fingers. “My sweet girl. I’m so sorry.”

You sniff, holding him tighter before opening your mouth again. “W–Why are you sorry?” Your voice sounds hoarse and confused.

“Because I didn’t do anything sooner,” he whispers, kissing your head. “I saw all the signs and I still stood there without moving a finger, and I’m so, so sorry, my love.”

“Quinn—”

“You mean so much to me, baby. I’ve been looking for someone like you my entire life and when I finally found you, I let you go away, and I’m not making the same mistake twice,” he slowly separated you from his body, but still kept you close. He lifts your chin, wiping your cheeks with his thumb. “Let me take care of you, Maddie. Let me show you how perfect you are, let me make you stop treating yourself like this.”

“This is the only life I know,” you tell him, losing yourself in his cologne. He smelled like home. “They’re the only family I have. It’s not that simple—”

“You know that’s not true, baby,” he kisses your cheek, lips touching your skin carefully. “You have my family. My parents love you, and so do my brothers. And I do too. I love you so fucking much, Maddie. You’re it for me.”

It’s like the broken pieces of your heart finally find their way back together. It’s like you came home after months sailing in the ocean, lost between the waves and your helpless thoughts.

“I may not be what you want.”

You feel his chest moving at the same time you hear his chuckle. “Can’t you see, baby? You’re the only thing I want. So if you’ll have me, I’m yours to keep.”

You look up at his eyes, softening your features, the tiniest smile to ever exist adorning your face. You finally kiss his lips, the saltiness of your tears mixing with the taste of his minty toothpaste, and you could swear you almost melted.

“I want to keep you,” you mumble against his lips. “I want you all to myself. I don’t care if I sound selfish or not but I’m tired of not doing what I want. I’ve been in love with you for eight years now and I can’t— I don’t want to hold back anymore. I’m not perfect, I have tons of flaws and I’m not easy but I swear, baby, I’ll never love anyone as much as I love you.”

He kisses you again, pillowy lips briefly touching yours.

“I love you, Maddie. So much. Thank you for coming back to me.”

Thank you for getting me back again.

taglist: @hischierswhore @ru-kru @alwaysclassyeagle @he6rtshaker @nope-i-am-done @nngkay 🤎

[katakaluptastrophy]

Continuing to think about the horror of what happens to John, and the horrors of love...

When Alecto has first been created, she says to him "I picked you to change, and this is how you repay me?" and "What have you done to me?"

They're heartbreaking questions she has every right to ask, but there's something awful and ironic about them too. Because John also might have asked "what have you done to me?"

It's easy to get distracted by the cartoonish awfulness of John's own narration: "talk about police abuse", "come on, love. Guys as careful as me don't have accidents," "love a working tram system." But all of these comments come after moments where John has unwittingly come into proximity with violent death, an experience he repeatedly likens to having drugs forcibly injected into him; an omniscient, dream-like, out of body experience that seems to propel him forward through his basest impulses. The first time this happens, he's brought back from "the verge of something insane" by being shaken violently by P-. Lines like these aren't revealing John's diabolical plotting. They're a man who would rather own atrocities as premeditated than admit that he was losing his grip.

The second is when he encounters the soul of the earth. His human mind makes contact with the incoherent, furious soul of a planet. In any other context, this would be straightforwardly Lovecraftian. And everything he describes after that is full of elipses, jumbled, and detached. His friends are shot by gun-toting cultists and he says it was like a dream.

Hearing the earth screaming, feeling his friends' deaths under his skin like a drug, he might well have asked "what have you done to me?"

Alecto said to him, "I picked you to change, and this is how you repay me?" But as everything collapses, John says:

"I thought you were going to take me, somehow. Purge me. Use me as an instrument. But you didn't say anything...I was babbling, Show me. Come on. I'm ready. You kept screaming and screaming..."

John has spent months becoming something terrifying, an entity with yellow eyes and uncanny powers. He's discovered that death has an overwhelming impact on him that he cannot fully control. Everyone was relying on him to do something. And he did so many things: well-meaning things and stupid things and things that were lashing out in rage and frustration. Hundreds of people have died because of him. His friends have died because of him. Surely, surely there was a point to this. Surely there was meaning. Surely whatever did this to him, made him into this, had a greater plan.

But there is no plan. There is no great revelation. He tries to hurt the earth, to provoke some kind of answer, but the screaming continues. And when P dies, the person who snapped him out of it the last time, John lets go and the whole world dies.

John is kneeling on the grass vomiting up dirt and tearing out his own ribs, saying "there was still too much of me that was just a human being...", trying to swallow the soul of the earth. And by the end, the one shred he has to hold onto is a memory of playing with a doll as a child. That, and his anger...

The earth tried to reach out in the only way it could, amidst its incoherent suffering. And John tried to use the abilities it gave him, but he was only human. Fallible and proud and angry.

She said, "I still love you." And the horror; the horror of love, the horror of this story, is that to begin with they did this to each other.

To be clear: I don't mean to diminish the awfulness or the very specific forms that John's violence against Alecto takes, and continues to take across the story. I don't mean to excuse his own self-mythologisation. I certainly don't think he's blameless for the decisions he made and the agenda he pursued. But if there's one thing that happens over and over again in TLT, it's that the horror of love is not a one-way street.

And I wonder, in light of what we now know about the permeability of the soul, quite where John ends and Alecto begins. And when that blurring began...

[hopelessrromantix]

kinktober day 10 boot riding

daddy kink, amab reader yes ill post the missing days i swear sjdkf

cis women dni

The longer you stayed at a party, the more boring it got.

Sure, getting drunk and high and fucking around with your classmates was a good time. But after hours of huddling together with sweaty drugged up teenagers and having generic music blasted into your ears, it got a bit boring.

But Billy always found a way to make it more entertaining. Normally by pulling off a rather impressive keg stand. For once, he’d offered to be the designated driver (mostly because you’d done it for the past four parties and refused to do it again), so you were downing your second drink, talking to some junior you barely knew. The buzz of a high was clouding your head, though it wasn’t enough to impair your judgment.

But apparently your boyfriend felt like pissing you off tonight.

Eventually the junior wandered off, probably to flirt with someone interested. Billy, on the other hand, was chatting up some girl from your math class. You didn’t remember her name, but you most certainly remembered the way she talked to Billy.

She gave a fake laugh, making sure to lean forward and give him a decent view of her cleavage. Not that you blamed her for trying to sleep with your boyfriend. Billy was pretty, and it’s not like she knew he had a boyfriend. So no, you didn’t hold any resentment toward the girl.

Billy, on the other hand, was in a world of hurt.

He had every chance to turn her down. Every chance to make up some half-assed excuse or just plain tell her he wasn’t into it. But no. He joked and gave her some cheesy pick-up line. The brat even had the nerve to look your way while he was doing so, giving you a wink.

You watched for a minute longer, waiting for him to make some excuse to leave. But when it was obvious he had no plans of doing so, you decided to step in for him.

“C’mon Hargrove, you’re my ride home.” Luckily your head was clear enough to make walking out easy.

Billy frowned, trying to look as disappointed as possible. “Already? But I was having fun!” The girl next to him looked sad as well, as if begging you to let him stay longer.

“Sorry, I gotta get up early tomorrow,” You said, shrugging. Tomorrow was Saturday, neither you nor Billy had anything to do. But she didn’t need to know that.

“Fine, buzzkill.”

Billy, tap dancing on your last nerve, gave the girl a wink, causing her to let out an airy giggle. You rolled your eyes, stomping out of the house. You could hear Billy mumble what was most certainly a sarcastic comment under his breath.

You sat in the passenger seat the second he opened the door, waiting as he slid into the driver’s seat a second later.

After a second of him realizing you weren’t going to speak, he started driving, the music from the party fading into the background as he did so.

“Your mom and that bastard home?” You knew the answer was no. He’d made quite a big deal about getting the house to himself while Neil dragged his step-mom and Max on a ‘family outing’. Even with Max asking, Billy was left home alone.

“No, why?” He asked, glancing over to you before his eyes returned to the road. He was perfectly aware of ‘why’, you knew that much.

“Gonna let me stay over, pretty boy?” You asked, your tone low. He nodded, quickly taking a turn to head toward his house.

The trip was short and Billy got out of the car almost immediately after you arrived. You chuckled at how eager he was, fumbling with his keys in an attempt to get in quicker.

You followed closely, heading to Billy’s room without much hesitation.

The second you got in, you closed the door, pressing Billy up against a wall.

“You got some fuckin’ nerve, Hargrove,” you spoke quietly and quickly, though you knew he heard you from how he shivered. “You tryna get my attention, or just tryna whore around with some poor girl, hm?”

He shook his head rapidly, gulping down a breath.

Billy tried his hand at being a brat often. Always teasing you, getting your attention in public. But the second you were behind closed doors, he practically melted.

“Words, baby boy.”

“No, Daddy.”

God he knew what buttons to press.

“Then why were you flirting?” You spoke softly, loving how his eyes glazed over with lust when you did so. “Giving her hope for no reason. That just seems mean, baby.”

He made a noise of disagreement, shaking his head again. “Didn’t mean to, just wanted your attention.”

You chuckled. “No, you knew exactly what you were doing.”

He opened his mouth to protest, but you slammed your lips into his before he could. You took over the kiss quickly. His arms twined around your neck, one of yours on his hip and the other gripping his hair. You gave a soft tug to his hair, forcing a loud moan out of his throat.

You slotted one thigh between his legs, giving him the chance to messily rut against you. Both your pants were tight, his jeans no doubt uncomfortable at this point.

“Pleeease just fuck me.” He was practically begging, arms tightening around you. “Please, I’m sorry for flirting with her, I won’t do it again.”

You both knew damn well he’d do it again.

“I don’t think I feel like forgiving you yet, baby.” He huffed at your words, hips still moving against your clothed thigh.

“How about this,” You suggested. You placed your hands on his shoulders, lowering him to his knees and placing your boot between his legs. “You cum in under two minutes, and I’ll fuck you so hard you won’t remember your damn name.”

He nodded rapidly, head collapsing into your leg.

He moved his hands towards his jeans, only stopping when you firmly questioned what he was doing.

"I can't use my hands?" He asked, looking slightly hopeful. As if he'd get off that easy.

“If you really want me to fuck you, you can cum like this.”

He paused for a moment. “Like ‘this’?”

You smirked, tilting his head up slightly with one finger. “You think you can cum in your jeans for me?”

He shivered, nodding fervently.

"Good boy."

He started off slow, moving his hips against the firm leather of your boot. It was just enough stimulation for his sensitive cock. He was burying his face into your jeans, mouthing at your dick over the fabric. You just let him, watching as he desperately tried to get you to force your cock down his throat.

"One minute left." He whimpered.

His thrusts sped up, messily humping your boot in an attempt to get off. Barely decipherable mumbles of "please" "Daddy" and "more" tumbled out his lips, the words jumbled together and high pitched.

"You gonna cum, whore?" You asked, spitting out the term as if it was his name. He moaned, nodding.

"Please can I? Please Daddy? Wanna cum for you so you'll fuck me, please?"

You'd barely said yes before he buried his face into your thigh, hips stuttering and slowing. Cum slowly seeped through the fabric of his boxers, and suddenly he was thankful you'd waited until he was home to ruin him.

"Good job handsome," you said, leaving down and placing a surprisingly soft kiss on his forehead. "You get your reward now."

He was practically buzzing already.

[appleblueberry-pie]

MORE YANDRE MILES PLSS I LOVE THEM

im just gonna put whatever comes to mind. trying to be as unhinged as you guys let me be. tell me if you want worse/weirder. fem reader.

Miles stopped caring about how fucked up he became when it comes to you. It doesn't matter when you're his only form of bliss he can find anymore. he kills every night. he can't sleep. he drains his mind and body every day. he has school grades to worry about and how he's gonna get the next 5 thousand from that one gang he made an agreement with two weeks ago. and, yet with the drugs he sees being slipped into people's hands on the way to school, and the syringes he feels cracking under his clean J's, the only thing that's pure enough to cleanse his mind, body, and soul is you. everyone wears the same shit to school every day, but you make it fit your personality and looks perfectly.

cut to the chase, he can't help but imagine being skin to skin with you every night. he wants you to rake your fingers into his scalp. fuck the fresh braids, he needs your nails on his skin. scratch his back, scalp, arms, anything. he wants marks of you on him any way possible. too young for certain activities, but when it comes to you, he'll fucking murder anyone. drug anyone, kill anyone for you. he hates when you pass him and he catches a whiff of your perfume, or even better, your natural musk. because he'll just stay in his head for the next few days. you're his high. he needs you.

he wants you to talk into his ears all damn day and never stop. he wants to hear you whisper, talk, laugh, cry, yell. everything. he never sees you crack a single smile in the science class you guys take together. But when he sees you howling your fucking ass off with your close friends, pushing, grabbing your friends, giggling, squealing with them, it just sets his whole body on fire. he's so fucking jealous of them, he just breaks anything in his vicinity at the thought of not having what you're giving them. he then began to wonder how he could have you for himself. he just wants you to give him all of you, and he'd obviously give you himself. why can't he have that?

when you pair up with him for a project in that science class you both share, he never thanked god so so so much in 15 seconds like he did when you began walking over to where he sat.

it gave him an excuse to stare at you and drink in every square inch of your body like he'd see an angel once and never see it again until he died. he greedily drinks in your scent while you speak. being able to see, hear, smell, and feel you if he tries hard enough, is almost overstimulating for him. he's great at hiding his emotions, but on the inside he wonders if this is what it feels like to take heroine. when you ask him a question about possible presentation ideas, he almost asks you to sit on his lap so he can hear you better.

Miles has been having maladaptive daydreams about you for the past year or so. so it was very difficult in that moment for him to separate his dreams from reality when he finally got a chance to communicate with you. before you left the class to get to your next period, you had already typed your number in his phone. he had already formed in his mind a way to locate your exact living apartment number. that way he can sneak in when you aren't there. miles needs you in his arms as soon as possible.

[the0doreslover]

Hi do you still do requests if so i have an odd one for you.

Ravenclaw reader has a headache and asks for a remedy from one of the Gryffindors, Fred gives her a Potion in a bottle that she drinks all of it. It's not until her second lesson that she starts feeling funny, she realized it's a combo of LSD and water so she trippin. She normally quite shy and reserved. Realising she cant concentrate she skips her lessons and stays at the tower where's she meets Theodore Nott and is giggling like a child. He finds it amusing and she confesses he situation.

chemical romance

it may of been the fact that you hadn’t been sleeping very well for the past couple of nights but you woke up with a splitting headache, causing you to wince in pain at every slight movement you made.

You had just about made it out of bed and into the great hall when you took a seat at whatever table was closest.

you ended up on the gryfindor table surrounded by some of your friends

“you look like shit” ron laughed

“thank you ron, always so sweet”

“what’s going on with you?” hermione asked genuinely curious for her friend

“my head is killing me” you explained

“freddy don’t we have something for that?” george asked his brother with a smile

“are you talking about our new and improved headache remedy” fred replied a bit to animatedly

“i’ll honestly take anything”

“anything?” they asked at the same time making you regret your statement

“don’t do it y/n you can’t trust them” harry piped in

“thanks for your concern harry but i’d literally take slugs if that got rid of this headache”

“if you want we can give you slugs as well” george smiled

“don’t test me”

after breakfast you followed the twins to their dorm and sat quietly on george’s bed while you waited for them to cure you

a few minutes later they came out with a bottle, after pouring it into a cup you were shooed out of their dorm

“so i just drink this?”

“yeah, drink you won’t know what hit you”

you were about to ask what they meant by that before you saw the door being shut in your face

“well, thank you” you shouted at the door hoping they could hear.

wasting no time you quickly gulped back the liquid and started walking to your class.

Potions, one of the most long lessons in your timetable.

you were currently trying to brew a sleeping draught with seamus finnigan while also waiting for your medicine to take effect.

once snape assessed your potion you sat back down and closed your eyes for a second

“hey y/n what are you doing after classes?” you heard seamus ask you

opening your eyes you froze at the change in scene, your vision started going fuzzy, you blinked a few times to try and fix it but instead it made it worse. Now things were breathing?

you couldn’t focus on what seamus was asking you, and instead were just trying to understand what was happening to you.

“i was wondering if you would like to hang out?” his voice echoed like a loud microphone

you looked down at your hand and watched as it left a trail as you waved it. Looking back up remembered a book you read last year on muggle-

those ginger twits gave you drugs.

luckily for you it wasn’t that high of a dose but despite that you still were finding it hard to concentrate on anything.

“so what do you say?” seamus asked again while that question rung in your mind sounding quite odd

you laughed, not on purpose, you swear

“you don’t have to? no need to laugh at me” he grumbled

you quickly shot up attracting some eyes of other students

“sir i need to leave” you said with a smile looking at a random student who looked a lot like snape.

“i’m over here miss L/n, what is the reason?”

you tried your best to locate where he said that from and quickly thought of an excuse

“i’m not feeling well!” you laugh and accidentally said to loud before giving up and quickly grabbing your things ready to shoot out the door.

snape had just about excused you, not believing your situation as you laughed in his face, once you had been allowed to go you wandered the hallways shouting insults aloud

“stupid weasleys, that’s illegal!”

“how dare they give me drugs”

“i’m going to kill them”

despite your anger you couldn’t stop yourself laughing

you shortly found yourself at the entrance of the astronomy tower.

finding no point in going to your next lesson you went up the stairs.

you found looking at the floor quite interesting to be honest, the way the tiles were moving was quite calming to you

you were still grumbling insults towards the twins when you got to the tower

“you alright?”

you jumped at the voice and quickly looked up, despite your vision being a bit off you could make out the face of the slytherin, Theodore nott.

“yeah” you laughed

“alright”

you both started at each other in awkward silence before you burst into laughter yet again

“did i say something funny?” he looked amused

“not you” you smiled

“this is the most i’ve heard you say in all the years i’ve shared classes with you”

“haha very funny” you said trying to be sarcastic but ending up laughing your ass off “i’m sorry, i really am sorry”

“no way” he said, his eyebrows raising and mouth turning up into a grin

you of course could barely make out the objects around you

“what?” you asked

“you’re on drugs!” he said and this time it was his turn to laugh

“no no no” you said trying to keep a straight face but failing miserably starting a chain of laughter between the two of you

“i cannot believe this! Y/n L/n is on dr-”

you quickly shot forward and tried to put your hand on his mouth, but ended up covering his eyes

“no one can ever know this” you whispered while he nodded

“what did you take?” he asked

“i…. don’t know?” you grinned

“you’re funny” he replied

“trust me, i’m not i’m only interesting right now because i’m on drugs… wait am i going to become a drugaholic? shit i’m a drug addict!” you panicked suddenly not finding the situation funny

he sat down leaning against the railing while you followed.

“you’re definitely in the panicking stage but don’t worry i think you have to drugs everyday to be a drug addict” he smiled “you’re fine”

you smiled back and almost forgot, you were actually talking to a slytherin!

almost forgot

“i shouldn’t be talking to you” you said turning away from him

“oh yeah? why’s that”

“you don’t like my friends” you answered

“can’t i not like you’re friends and like you?”

“it doesn’t work like that” you said looking back at him now

“why can’t we make it work?” he said softly

“you know i have barely been able to see your face this whole time” you laughed changing the subject

“why’s that?” he asked

“your blurry”

you both bursted into laughter again

“we should go somewhere else, there’s a class in here next”

“we? no i’m going to sleep this off, have fun going somewhere else” you said beginning to walk away. You felt him grab your hand, turning to face him he smiled

“for the record i always found you interesting”

he let go then walked right past you

you watched his figure go down the stairs and stood frozen for a minute

“wait theodore! i can’t go down these stairs, i could just about go up them, i’ll fall and die!”

[aemondapologistfrfr]

Your Favorite Flavor - pt3

modern!aemond x fem!dealer!reader

Part 1 Part 2

Summary: Aemond and you have been talking nonstop and he makes the trip to come visit you. By the end of his visit you two are closer than he ever thought possible. 

Warnings: 18+ swearing, smoking, drugs(weed), face riding, fingering, spanking, oral(f+m), p in v, unprotected

Authors Note: idk when i’m ever gonna get over this man and it’s a touch concerning ! n e ways this is cute and filthy again x

Word Count: 5.6k

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The semester is still a couple weeks out and Aemond has never been more excited for exams so he can go home and see you again. He texts you when he has any moment of spare time and everytime he sees the three little dots his heart races. On late nights when his roommate is out he FaceTimes you for hours and listens to you whine that he’s not next to you. 

“And you say I’m the one who pouts.” Aemond chuckles as you groan and roll over on your bed. 

“Shut up, almond.” you glare at the screen filled with his face. “I think you should come visit me.” you mumble and he grins. 

“Why?” he smirks and you scoff. 

“Do you need an excuse to come see me? You’re the one who begged me last time.” you purse your lips and he relaxes back into his bed. 

“Mm, I think I’d like to hear you beg for me.” he watches your cheeks flush. 

“I’m sure you would.” your voice doesn’t hold the steadiness you’d like it to. 

“I’ll wait.” he chews on his lip with a smile. 

“Aemond,” he hums at you saying his actual name for once. “Please Aem,” you push your bottom lip out. His heart races as your tone “You don’t even have to stay the whole weekend. I just want you to make me come and smoke with me.” you bat your eyelashes at him. “Please,” you whine and he groans and he’s already mentally packing his bag. 

“What will I get out of it?” he raises his brow, enjoying that he’s teasing you for once. 

“Anything.” the word spills from your mouth quickly. “Kisses, head, you can keep me in bed the whole time if you want.” his eyes darken watching you get worked up. “I won’t call you almond all weekend.” he throws his head back and laughs. 

“I don’t believe that for one second.” he purses his lips. 

“Are you coming or not?” you pout. 

“Ask me nicely one more time.” he watches as you move from the bed and prop the phone up and you get on your knees putting your hands in front of you. His breath catches watching you stare at him from the ground. 

“Aemond please,” your whine has his cock starting to harden. “Please come take care of me. I want your- 

“Hey Aemond.” his roommate walks into the room and Aemond turns the volume down. 

“Let me call you later.” he looks down at the phone with flushed cheeks.

“Wait wait, is that your little girlfriend?” Aemonds eyes widen at his words and is about to hang up the phone. 

“You can properly say goodbye to me. Do not hang up on me.” you purse your lips as he looks down at the screen and back to his roommate.

“That weed you gave me was some of the best shit I’ve had. I don’t mind being displaced if you leave more baggies.” he chuckles before walking into the bathroom and shutting the door with a snap. 

“You told him I’m your girlfriend?” you smile nibbling your lip. He groans, throwing his head back. 

“No, I,” he shakes his head. “I just,” his brows scrunch not knowing what to say and he feels his face heat. 

“Oh baby almond.” you coo much to his horror. 

“You said you wouldn’t call me almond.” he whines and you chuckle. 

“Then come make me stop.” you challenge. “Almond.” you watch his nostrils flare and you giggle. 

“I’ll pack a bag and be on my way within the hour.” he gets up and grabs an empty bag. 

“What about your Friday class?” you raise your eyebrow. 

“I haven’t used any of my absences yet, I’ll be good. I’ll text you when I’m on my way.” you nod quickly with a smile. 

“Okay. Drive safe, almond.” he rolls his eyes and hangs up the call. 

Aemond tosses his phone to the end of his bed and gets up throwing clothes into the bag. He goes to the fridge and grabs some of your soda to bring to you. His roommate comes out of the bathroom and looks at him packing his bag. 

“You good?” he falls back onto his bed. 

“I’m gonna be gone for the weekend.” Aemonds tone slightly clipped, remembering his words of his ‘little girlfriend’.

“Can you pick up for me from your girl? I can send you money.” Aemond sighs and nods his head zipping up his bag. 

“Yeah just send me the money and I’ll grab it.” he stands and offers him a smile. 

Aemond gets to his car quickly and tosses his bag in and starts it up. He sends you a text and starts his drive. He drums his fingers on the wheel with a ridiculous smile on face. He doesn’t care that it’s the middle of the night and he can’t wait to have you in his arms again. Time flies as he drives and soon he’s back in town. He calls you once he’s five minutes away and you answer with a sleep thick voice. 

“Aem?” you hum and he bites his lip. 

“I’m about to pull up.” he hears the blankets shuffle. 

“I’ll meet you outside.” you mumble and hang up the phone. He pulls into your driveway and sees you open the front door and wait for him on the porch. He grabs his bag and walks up to you and you wrap your arms around him. 

“You look so sleepy.” he hums, pulling back and cupping your cheeks. 

“I am.” you pout up at him and tug him into the house. You shut the door and lock it before pulling him upstairs. He follows you into your room and you grab his bag and toss it to the floor. 

“Get back into bed. I’ll be there soon.” he scoots you to your bed and starts to kick off his shoes. You watch him from under the blankets as he pulls his shirt off and pushes down his pants. You lift the blankets and he crawls into bed next to you and you curl against him and his arms wrap around you.

“I missed you.” you mumble and his arms tighten. 

“I missed you too.” he presses his lips to the top of your head. He looks down at you and sees your eyes shut and smiles as he closes his holding you closer. 

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Aemond stretches out as he feels a soft tickling at his neck. He smiles and wraps his arms around your waist as you start to kiss at his neck with more fervor. His hands slip under your shirt as you kiss up his jaw. You press your lips to his and squeak as his hands travel down and squeeze your ass. His hands trail between your thighs, smiling that you're bare and he starts to pull you up his body. 

“Aem,” you giggle as he keeps scooting you up. “What are you doing?” you bat at his hands. 

“Trying to get you to sit on my face.” he smirks as you flush on his chest. He rubs circles into your thighs trying to coax you a little higher. His fingers slip under your thighs and lift you quickly and you gasp as he sets you on his mouth. “Just like this.” he kisses each of your thighs before pressing his lips against your bud. 

His hands travel under your shirt and travel up to your breasts and begin to tweak your nipples. His tongue softly licks at you and you whimper softly above him. His lips encase your bud and you tremble holding onto his arms under your shirt. Your hips start to softly rock against his mouth and he starts lapping at you faster. 

“Please yes,” your pleas are breathy and he pinches your nipples and you mewl above him. His hands sliding down to your hips and he starts to grind you against his mouth. He watches your stomach flex and tighten and his tongue flicks even faster. He hears your quick gasps and pulls you closer against his mouth. “Aemond,” your nails dig into his arms as you come across his face. He lifts you off of his face and takes in your flushed face. 

You lean down and smash your lips to his. You kiss him desperately holding him tightly as he rolls over to hover above you. He can feel the absolute need pouring off of you as you whine into his mouth. He lifts up and chuckles as you pull him back down against you. He goes to lift up again and you wrap your legs around him holding him tightly. “Please,” you whine arching up into him. 

“Gods you’re so needy today.” he chuckles watching you squirm beneath him. He laughs as a pout forms on your face and he kisses it away. You sigh, burying your fingers in his hair. “What do you wanna do today?” he hums against your lips. 

“You.” you reach up and press your lips to his. 

“I was thinking I could take you out somewhere.” he pulls back and looks down at you. 

“Almond, are you trying to take me on a date?” you smirk up at him and watch his cheeks flush. 

“You said you wouldn’t call me that all weekend.” he purses his lips as you continue to giggle. “Get up and get dressed.” he untangles from you and watches you pout in the pile of blankets. 

“Where are you dragging me?” you throw your shirt at him and he turns to you with dark eyes. 

“I want to surprise my little girlfriend and take her somewhere. So get up and get dressed.” your breath catches at his tone causing your cheeks to heat. You nod and walk over to your closet grabbing out clothes. He watches you get dressed and smiles to himself that you actually listened and looked flushed. He pulls his pants on and grabs the bag with your soda. “I brought you these.” he hums and you turn to him tilting your head. 

“Almond.” you coo grabbing the bag. He’s had enough of the nickname for the weekend and stalks over to you grabbing your chin making you look up at him. “Hm?” you blink up at him. 

“I’ve had enough of you calling me almond.” he glares at you as you smirk. “I mean it.” he flares his nostrils. 

“Mm do you almond?” he dips his head down to yours. 

“If you say it again I won’t let you come for the rest of the weekend.” he watches your eyes widen in shock. 

“That’s no way to treat your ‘little girlfriend’.” you purse your lips squinting your eyes at him. 

“It's no way to treat your boyfriend calling him ‘baby almond’.” he waits for your response as he watches your cheeks flush. 

“If you wanna date me you need to ask me out.” you tilt your chin up higher. 

“If you wanna date me you need to stop calling me baby almond.” he raises his eyebrow to you. 

“So is little almond okay? Or what about my little almond joy?” he exhales deeply looking up at the ceiling. 

“Your little almond joy is getting ready to put you over his knees.” you smile getting excited seeing this side of him. “I don’t want to hear anything else. Finish getting dressed so I can take you on a date.” he purses his lips as he grabs his bag to find a shirt. 

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Aemond stares at you from across the table unbelieving that he’s in a staring contest with you at a cafe. You rest your head in your hands and stare at him unblinking and he mirrors your movements. The waitress drops off the drinks and you mumble a thanks still staring ahead at Aemond. You know this will make him terribly mad but you have no plans on losing. You kick his leg under the table and he blinks at you, baffled as you start to giggle. 

“You lose.” you say triumphant before grabbing your glass and sipping your coffee. 

“You cheated.” he shakes his head, grabbing his drink. 

“The only rule you said was no blinking. Don’t be such a sore loser, little almond.” he chuckles, raising his eyebrows at you. 

“Baby brother?” Gods that’s a voice he wasn’t expecting to hear. He watches your face soften as Helaena approaches your table. “What are you two doing?” she nibbles her lip with a knowing smile. 

“He begged to take me on a date.” you look up at his sister with a grin. “How could I say no to sweet baby almond?” you slide your eyes to Aemond and see him clench his jaw. 

“Moms gonna be mad you didn’t tell her you’re in town.” Helaena looks at him and he groans. 

“Don’t tell her.” he looks up at her with pleading eyes. 

“I won’t if you tell me how long this has been going on.” she gestures between us, chewing her lip to hide her smile. 

“A couple weeks. He’s terribly obsessed with me.” his eyes snap to you as you joke with his sister. 

“How could he not be?” she laughs. “Don’t fuck this up.” Helaena hisses at Aemond. “Okay well enjoy and I’ll text you somewhere nice to take her.” she tosses over her shoulder as she makes her way up to the counter to order her drink. 

“What did I say about ‘baby almond’?” he watches you try and fail to stifle your laughter. 

“I mean technically I said ‘sweet baby almond’.” he starts to tap his rings against the glass as he stares at you. You recline back into your chair as you look at him pouting.

“Aemond if you want to woo her you need to speak and not just stare at her like that.” Helaena approaches our table once more. He slides his eyes up to her, pursing his lips. 

“Everytime I try to talk to her she teases me.” he offers me a pointed look and Helaena and I giggle at the same time. 

“That means she likes you, loser.” Helaena whispers in his ear and pats his back. “Ugh you two are cute.” she sticks her finger in her mouth jokingly before she leaves the cafe. His phone dings and he pulls it out looking at what Helaena’s suggestion is. 

helaena: *sent directions* 

Aemond clicks it and groans at her stupidity. You  snatch the phone from him and bark out a laugh and he takes his phone back with red cheeks. You pull out your phone to message Helaena. 

you: Gods you should see him blushing at ‘Poundtown’ i literally have tears in my eyes buuut tmi? we’ve already been there 🫣🤭 

hel: i figured 😭 he was far too happy when he came back from picking up from you 🙄 

You look up and see Aemond frowning at you with red cheeks. He doesn’t want you to see him as just Helaena’s little brother that you occasionally fuck. You put your phone back in your pocket and reach for his hand across the table. He places his hand in yours and you wrap your other hand around it too. 

“I’m sorry.” you say softly and he scrunches his brows. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” he shakes his head feeling embarrassed for showing his feelings on his face so openly. 

“I am enjoying my time with you today.” his eyes search yours. “As much as I love you between my thighs, it’s nice to go out.” your words are so soft and the way you’re holding his hands has his heart beating faster.

“Any amount of time you spend with me I enjoy. No matter what we do.” its your turn to flush at his words.

“Careful baby almond. Your massive crush is showing.” he rolls his eyes, squeezing your hands tightly.

“You think you’re hiding yours any better?” he raises a brow. “You were the one begging last night and whining about how much you missed me.” he loves watching your cheeks redden at his words.

“You’re the one who drove to me in the middle of the night.” you watch his smile grow.

“You still haven’t thanked me. I come all the way down here just to hold you and make you come and what do I get? Relentless teasing.” you chew the inside of your cheek as you chuckle.

“Thank you for always being so desperate to get between my thighs.” you watch him flare his nostrils.

“Gods you’re being a brat today.” he shakes his head at you. 

“I am not.” you glare at him across the table.

“Oh, but you are.” he smiles watching your cheeks flush. You huff and rise from the table and start towards the door, smiling as you hear his chair scrape on the ground. You push open the door and start to walk down the sidewalk until he pulls you back against him. You look up at him with that pout that drives him crazy and he buries his fingers in your hair tilting your head up for him. He doesn’t know what’s gotten into you today. He’s ready to pull you down an alley and take you against the bricks. 

“I thought I was getting my sweet baby almond today, not pouting Aemond.” he watches your lips turn up and he tilts your head further up. 

“Yet all you’ve done today is tease me.” you bite your lip at his tone. 

“No.” you try to shake your head but his fingers won’t give. You look up at him waiting for him to do something. You want to see if that authoritative tone earlier was just a show or if he would back it up. You figured teasing him relentlessly was the best route, you’ll either be on your knees apologizing with your mouth or over his knees like he said. “Baby almond.” you coo.

“Let’s go.” his hand leaves your hair and wraps around your wrist pulling you. You pull him back and he turns with a glare. “Walk to the car or I’ll drag you.” his voice low. 

“I don’t believe you.” you purse your lips and he chuckles. His grip tightens and he starts to pull you to the car. You see his jaw flex as he starts to pull you faster. He pulls the door open for you and looks at you expectantly. 

“Get in the car.” you take your seat and he has the door clicked shut a second later. 

“Where are you taking me now, almond?” you turn to him with a smile. 

“Home.” his tone excites you. 

“Why?” you whine and he slides his eyes to you turning on the car. 

He shakes his head and pulls the car onto the road. You take his hand and he can’t stop the small smile on his face as you twist his rings. A low groan comes from his lips as you take one of his fingers into your mouth. You brush your tongue against the digit and Aemonds breathing deepens. He pulls his finger from your mouth and pats his hand on your thigh leaving it there. The rest of the ride is silent building promises of what’s to come. 

“Is anyone home?” he turns to you when he pulls in the driveway. 

You shake your head and he gets out of the car and is pulling you out of your side quickly. You unlock the door and he ushers you inside and is dragging you up the stairs. Once in your room he tugs you over the bed and your heart races in anticipation. He sits down and looks up at you with a smirk. 

“Take off your clothes.” your breath catches at his words. He nods at you, raising an eyebrow. You slowly peel off each layer and he leans back and watches you. He can not wait to absolutely ruin you once you're in his arms. He holds his hand out for you to come to him and you slowly walk to stand in front of him. “Gods look at you.” he hums, sliding his hands from your waist down to your hips. He brings one of his hands down hard on your ass and watches you bite your lip and scoot closer to him. He repeats the action with his other hand and you let out a small whimper. 

“Please,” his eyes darken and he guides you over his knees. You squeeze your legs shut and he chuckles trailing a finger up your slit. He smiles as his finger slides through your dripping center while you squirm beneath him. His other hand comes down on your cheek as he slips his finger into your core. “Aemond,” you whine as he starts to pump his finger. 

“Hm?” he brings his hand down again on your cheek as he slips a second finger in. He watches your legs curl up as he starts to slam his fingers into you. He spanks each of your cheeks again and the sweetest sounds he’s ever heard fall from your lips. Aemond listens to the sounds you make to be sure you’re still enjoying yourself even though he can feel your squeezing his fingers tightly. The sounds of your pleas and wetness cause his cock to throb and he pulls his fingers out needing to have you right now. 

“No, please,” you grab for his arm and he chuckles at your desperation. “I’ll be good.” you whine and he groans at your words before lifting you up. 

“I know you will.” he pushes you onto the bed and you lift your ass into the air for him. 

He pulls his clothes off and he watches you spread your legs wider for him. He brings your hips to him and he swirls his tip around your wetness. He pushes in slowly clenching his teeth at the feel of you wrapping around him. You grip the sheets as he starts to snap his hips into yours. When his hand lands on your cheek you fall apart around him moaning loudly. 

“Fuck.” Aemonds fingers dig into your hips continuing to push into you. 

His pleasure builds at your small whimpers and gasps that fill the room along with the sounds of your wetness. You push your hips back into his and he lands his hands onto your ass again. His hips falter as you pulse around him whining his name. His fingers dig into you as his high washes through him. He collapses on the bed next to you and you move to lay against his chest. 

“So you’re done pouting now?” your taunt comes out breathy. He flips you over and you look up at him nibbling your lip as he hovers above you with dark eyes. 

“You’re not done with your attitude.” you squeak when his fingers slip back into you. When his thumb swipes across your bud you tremble. You arch up into him and he chuckles leaning down above your lips. You reach up and he pulls his head back watching you pout. He curls his fingers watching your face scrunch with pleasure the faster he moves.

“Aemond, please,” you gasp, holding onto his arm. “Please,” the word goes straight to his cock once more. He chuckles as your pleasure coats his fingers and pours out of you while you cling against him. He pulls his fingers out and slams into you and your breath catches in your throat. “Yes, Aem,” your eyes roll back as he hammers into you. 

“Fucking perfect.” he grunts and you claw into his back when his fingers circle your sensitive bud. A loud cry falls from your lips as your pleasure explodes through you. Your toes curl as he slams into you while spilling his pleasure into you. He rests his forehead on yours as you both pant. “Anything more to say?” you shake your head clinging against him. 

“Please,” you pull him down to your lips. He slowly presses his lips to yours and when his tongue slips into your mouth you sigh. He rolls you both over and has you rest against his chest as his fingers caress your skin. You whimper into his mouth at his soft touch and he kisses down your neck. 

“I’m gonna take you dinner tomorrow. You’ll be nice and you won’t call me almond.” he sucks softly on your neck and you nod holding onto him tightly.

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Today Aemond has seen how much you’ll allow him to get away with. Everytime you nod your head at a suggestion his heart races. You didn’t even protest when he picked out your shortest, flirest dress for you to wear. You simply smiled and paired it with long socks that made his eyes darken. Not even when he pushed his fingers into your panties on the way to the restaurant, you just put them in your mouth after you came all over them. 

“Fuck your like a perfect little doll today.” he groans watching you clean his fingers as you both sit parked outside of the restaurant. 

“After the way you fucked me yesterday you can have anything, Aem.” you bat your lashes at him and he groans. He gets out of the car and goes to your door and offers you his hand. He leads you into the dim restaurant and you lean against him as you wait to be led to the table. 

“Are your cheeks still sore?” he dips down and whispers in your ear. 

You gasp as his hand squeezes against your ass before wrapping around your waist. You look up at him with pleading eyes and he leans down to press his lips to yours. He chuckles at your pout as he pulls back. You’re both led to a table and he pulls out your chair for you. He sits across from you and you smile looking at his relaxed features. 

“You are so handsome, Aemond.” you reach your hand out for his. You haven’t called him almond all day and he refuses to admit he misses it the smallest amount. “So cute when you blush.” he grabs your hand and brings it to his mouth. “I wish you didn’t have to leave in the morning.” your soft words surprise him. 

“I don’t want to leave either.” he rubs his thumb across your hand. “I’ll be home in a couple weeks.” your frown causes his chest to tighten. 

“I know. I’m just going to miss you.” you don’t care how needy you sound. “I know we’ll call and stuff but,” your frown deepens. 

“I mean there’s no reason we can just switch driving to each other every weekend.” he nibbles on his lip. “It’s not that far. Unless that’s too much and- 

“I would like that.” you nod your head quickly. “A lot.” you can’t help the smile that spreads across your face. 

“So you’ll come up next weekend?” he searches your eyes. 

“I’ll be there on Friday when you get out of class.” you squeeze his hand. 

“As my girlfriend?” he knows there’s a flush on his face as he waits for your answer. 

“Or your perfect doll.” you offer him a playful smile. 

“Both?” his eyes darken. 

“I suppose I could do that for my boyfriend.” you watch a smile spread across his face. 

The waitress takes your orders and you spend the next couple of hours in a sweet bliss enjoying each other's company. When you get home you push him back onto your bed and roll at your desk. He watches you walk back to him and he just wants to lay you out in the bed and devour you. 

“Here.” you crawl into bed with him and lean against him. He lights the blunt and passes it to you. Your eyes become lidded as you both smoke and you start to look at him with such intense need. “Finish it.” you hum and slide down his body to settle between his legs. He looks at you with flushed cheeks as you start to unbutton his pants. 

He groans as you wrap your fingers around him and free him from his pants. You suck his tip into his mouth and watch his chest heave. He brings the blunt to his mouth and watches you lower your mouth. He sighs feeling your soft lips wrap around him and he curses as you hollow your cheeks. You look up at him and he groans, putting the blunt in the ashtray. 

“You’re fucking perfect.” Aemond rasps down to you.  You start to bob your head faster and he tosses his head back. His hips jerk and you follow his movements and his fingers tangle in your hair. With the way you’re looking at him his stomach starts to tighten as you bob faster. You bring him to the back of your throat and he groans, pulling your hair as his pleasure flows into your mouth. You hum around him swallowing his pleasure as soft moans fall from his mouth. You slowly pull your mouth off of him watching his face twist with pleasure. 

“Come up here.” you slowly crawl back up the bed and he smashes his lips to yours. He pulls your dress up and rubs his fingers across your soaked panties. ���Lay back on the bed.” he smiles against your lips. He pushes the sleeves down your arms and tugs the dress down to expose your chest. His lips attach to one of your nipples and he quickly flicks his tongue across it. He takes the peak between his teeth and chuckles as you squirm beneath him. His other hand is between your thighs teasing you above your panties. 

“Aemond please,” your hips chase his hand. He listens to your soft pleases as he licks across your chest to your other nipple before swirling around it with his tongue. He smiles feeling your panties getting wetter as he teases you. He harshly sucks your peak into his mouth and you whimper above him. He rises and leaves your chest glistening before he slides down your body. He presses his lips against your panties watching your thighs shake beside his head. 

He flicks his tongue against your covered bud and your chest heaves. You grind against his face and he chuckles and slides his tongue down to your core. He pulls back and looks down at you. Your pouted lips are parted and your cheeks are flushed. His eyes slide to your chest and your hardened nipples that he wants to put between his teeth again just so he can hear those soft cries. He then looks at your panties that are soaked just for him. 

“Touch me, please.” his eyes snap up to yours at your plea. “Please, Aem,” you’re begging for him. You, his girlfriend. His head spins and he pulls off your panties. He throws your legs over his shoulders as his mouth attaches to your core. He groans being greeted by your dripping center. “Yes,” you cry arching off the bed. His hands push your dress up more to dig into your waist. You fall apart as his tongue lashes against you. He slowly pulls back watching the pleasure still course through your body. 

He brings his lips to yours and you hold him against you. He pulls back to tug his clothes off and helps you do the same. He lays back into bed and pulls the blankets over you both as you cling to him. He smiles to himself that you didn’t call him almond all day and now you’re officially his girlfriend who’s curled against him. 

                                         ᓚᘏᗢ

You sit in bed with a frown as you watch Aemond pack his bag. He walks over to you with a shirt and slips it over your head before bending down and pressing his lips to yours. You try to pull him back into bed but he pulls you out of it. You purse your lips walking over to your dresser to grab a pair of sweats. 

“My roommate wants to pick up.” Aemond hums walking over to you. You hand him a couple baggies and he sends you the money. You hand him an extra baggie for himself regardless of his protests. “You don’t have to.” he stuffs them into his bag. 

“I want to, almond.” his head snaps to you and sees your smirk. 

“Don’t start this right as I’m about to leave.” he flares his nostrils as he slings his bag over his shoulder. 

“Start what?” you tilt your head. He shakes his head and your hand slips into his as you lead him downstairs and out to his car. He pulls you against him and presses his lips to yours. 

“I will see you on Friday.” he murmurs against your mouth. 

“Please drive safe and text me when you get there.” you press your lips to his once more. He gets in his car and you watch him as he backs out of the driveway. 

ততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততততত

masterlist 🔌 

me vs saying two more parts again bc i already started pt4 and it won’t be the last chap that’s fs

ur fav flav taglist: @echos-muses @sinistersnakey @uwuuness

taglist ✍️ 

@clarityisnofun @gabriella-aesthetic @callsignwidow @llynx7 @violetiss3lfish @ka1afbr @akiko-oo @papichulo120627 @lizzylovebooks280501 @thatgirl101blog @1-fuzzy-squirrels @arya-brooke @ashovertheriver @zanygot7straykidsbonk @moonymoo1 @malfoycassimalfoy @april-notthemonth69 @anaviieiraaa @p45510n4f4shi0n @neocockthotology @thereaderwitch @hardkiddonut @faenyra @hiimava11 @daintylittlesunflower @primroseluna @fiction-fanfic-reader @povofjustme @multilover19 @alexxavicry @cedstars @fuckalrighty @mrsmunson-harrington @misspendragonsworld @nz2004 @ninihrtss

[planetwaynez]

FLOWERS AND GOLDEN STRINGS

CHAPTER TWO

Jason Todd x Fem!Reader

Soulmate AU!

Chapter Synopsis: Jason can't stop thinking about the flower shop girl, and beacuse of that he takes matters into his own hands. Y/N feels like she is being watched.

WARNINGS: stalking, mentions of crimes and drugs, mental health talk. If there is more let me know.

WORDS: 1,5k

TAGLIST: @27drunkdeer @solarrexplosion @mariam12344 @nyxisnotok

NOTES: This one is a shorter one but it's a important one!!! hope u all enjoy <3 take a look at the tags! every chapther will have a different type of flower in the tags, representing the feelings of Jason and Y/N!

Jason takes a deep breath after he finishes telling Roy about the encounter with the flower shop girl, and how that gave him an uneasy feeling. He is sitting on the couch and Roy is standing in front of him, arms crossed, hair tied up in a man bun and furrowed eyebrows, deep in thought. 

“Just a weird feeling?” he asks, now looking Jason in the eye. To Roy there is only one explanation to Jason’s uneasiness: He found his soulmate, but they didn’t touch, therefore, they are not properly linked to each other. However, Roy also knows his best friend and if he says his theory, Jason is going to close himself off. So he keeps it neutral. 

“Yes” the brunette answers, not quite looking at his friend, thinking that he is probably just with another crush, like it happened before. To Jason, the idea of finding his soulmate is impossible. To him, after he died, there is no more link, after all, he was gone. There is no way.

Roy disagreed. But he kept to himself, after all, every time they had this conversation, they ended up not talking for several months. 

“Ok, it could be a crush, you know?” Once again the redhead tries the safe line of conversation, not pushing Jason’s limits. 

“Yes” but his answer doesn't sound genuine, not even to him. Roy arches an eyebrow, looking at Jason as if he's full of bullshit. And he is, and they both know it.

“What? You think that the flower shop girl is some type of rogue?” Roy jokes but he sees it in his friends eyes when Jason finds an excuse.

Since he came back, Jason is always finding an excuse to do things, especially to his feelings, so it’s not a surprise that he is trying to associate a normal, kind flower shop girl to some crime scheme. 

“She could be” he gets up, as if he just got a revelation and Roy is shocked with his friend, even though he expected it. “That’s probably why I got this weird feeling towards her, it’s my gut telling me she is a rogue”

Jason is looking at Roy with arms open and a sort of crazy look in his eyes, but the redhead doesn’t say anything too out of the line, after all, he knows that Jason already made up his mind. This is Jason’s excuse to watch over the store and find out more about the girl that picked up his interest. 

“You are unbelievable” 

Roy leaves to his bedroom, not wanting to continue the talk or he would end up telling Jason to go to therapy, again, and that’s always a complicated subject. So he leaves his friend alone and, in his loneliness, Jason can’t stop thinking about her, a tight feeling settling in his chest, like a rope ready to snap any moment. It’s uncomfortable and weird and makes his breath uneven. She is just too adorable and kind and so not deserving of having a crazy crime lord vigilante on her back.

However, Jason is too curious.

He is going to find out more about her. 

….

Y/N always loved the idea of soulmates. Someone destined to be with you, someone that will always understand you and support and love no matter what, this gravitational force that is so strong and out of this world that makes two people in love, their souls linked in this life and many others. To her, soulmates exist to bring some type of comfort to people and she feels comforted by the idea. Since she was a little girl, she has dreamed of the day she will meet hers, and deep down she already loves them, because she can feel it. The string moving and adapting, looking for its other half. 

As another client leaves the shop, she moves her shoulders, trying to break the tension. As much as she loves love and seeing people in love, after some time it gets tiring hearing all those beautiful stories while selling flowers, while waiting for her turn to be gifted. She can feel the tension leaving a bit, but not enough, as if her body kept alert because of something lurking in the dark.

It's been weeks since she started feeling this way, as if she is being watched. Rationally, Y/N knows she works in a considerably dangerous zone, but the Sunshine Flower Shop, owned by Mrs.Sullivan was never a target, after all, it's been open for years and Mrs.Sullivan knows everyone and since the Red Hood took over the most fragile parts of the city he made sure two rules stuck. 1. Never swelling drugs to minors and 2. Never taking from theirs; The second rule basically tells minor criminals that they can’t take away from their own people, from their one neighborhood. So she knows that they wouldn't risk it. At least that’s what she likes to think. 

“You seem a bit off, dear, what's wrong?” coming from the back of the shop, Mrs.Sullivan asks, her kind brown eyes looking at her with worry.

Y/N smiles, once again trying to get rid of that tension settling on her shoulders. “Nothing, I am fine, Mr.Sullivan” 

The older woman doesn’t believe her, and Y/N knows it, but they don’t talk more about it. Mrs.Sullivan let the subject go with an arched eyebrow and worry filled eyes and Y/N pretends to not see it. 

After that a few other clients come and go and they keep their harmony in the shop, making beautiful bouquets and giving free smiles to everyone. When the time comes, they close up and once again she feels it. That unsettling feeling, the one to be watched.

But, at the same time, she can feel in her chest the way her string dances, the way it seems it’s looking for someone. It almost takes her breath away, especially because she doesn’t understand this. How can she feel so scared and so safe at the same time? 

She walks home, her hands closed in tight fists and her eyes roaming around but she can’t find the source of her weird feelings, not in the dark alleys and in the full moon shining in the sky. When she gets to her building and gets inside, it’s like everything fades away. There is no more fear and no more string dancing in her chest, it’s an emptiness, it’s an almost numbing feeling and it hits her like a punch to the face. 

It’s unexpected and cold. Y/N hates to feel scared, hates the way the fear makes her legs weak and the way her veins feel like steel and adrenaline is pumping all over her body but she can’t ignore the fact that the fear this time came along that thing in her chest. The string dancing, almost as if it was calling it’s equal. That feeling she didn't hate, she just hated that she had to feel afraid to feel the string again. 

After so long, she felt it again and she can’t quite believe it or understand but it's there. It's alive and it’s dancing and singing and looking for its other half. 

When she is inside her apartment, she sits on her couch and takes a deep breath. She needs a shower, and to think and to sleep.

….

With fascination, Jason watched the girl from the flower shop go home. She seems so scared but so pretty at the same time. He knows it's not healthy to think like that but it’s almost as if a stronger thing inside him was controlling his thoughts that night. 

He made a deep dive into the girl's life. He knows her full name, her parents names, knows her address, her blood type, where she studied and where she is currently studying at. What she likes and what she doesn’t like. He couldn’t help himself, he went on a spiral; Jason promised to himself it was going to be only the basics but when he realized, he was too deep into her life. 

He feels guilty about it but in all honesty, he doesn’t regret it.

She is fascinating.

She is everything he is not and everything he wishes to have. It’s a pearl walking around, being danglend on his face. 

He tells himself it’s just a crush and a little bit of paranoia but Jason knows it's none of that, he knows it's something deeper. There is this thing on his chest, moving like a bear after hibernation, with caution but with a strange ferocity. He can’t ignore it but to his sake he will. 

The last thing Jason saw of her that night was her face in the moonlight, looking over her shoulder. The knit brows, the half open lips that seem so soft and the pink cheeks. He had to almost physically restrain himself as he watched her get inside the building and when she did, he immediately left.

Jason knows that he shouldn’t keep this, but he won’t listen to his logical mind for once. He will follow his wants. And he wants more of Y/N.

[thezombieprostitute]

I know we may not know him too well but how about Dream Come True- Steve and 29 from the kiss prompts 😏

Hummingbird 

Word Count: ~1300

A/N: This takes place a couple of years before Dream Come True. Ask is based on this post.

Warnings: Drugging of a character

Part 2

Series Masterlist

Steve had his best fake smile plastered on. He was hosting a party, he had to appear approachable and friendly, even if he didn’t feel like it. The conversations could be so boring and draining. His one reprieve for the night was that he was hosting the party at an art gallery. The last night of the display of one of his favorite artists. Every chance he got he was appreciating the art.

At least until he saw you. Steve knew everyone at the party, they’d been vetted by his team, but he didn’t know you. There was no recognition, no faint memory of ever seeing you before and Steve’s memory was better than most. Your dress was just shy of the quality he’d expect from his guests, indicating you weren’t in the higher echelons of the city’s social circles. You were definitely a party crasher who shouldn’t be here. 

He should call security, have them discreetly take you away, but as he watches you he realizes that, unlike other party crashers, you’re not here for the people. You never take a glass of the expensive champagne offered to guests. You barely talk to anyone and excuse yourself from conversation quickly. You’re looking at the art. You’re flitting from piece to piece like a hummingbird and smiling at each one. You might be a party crasher, but you’ve clearly got good taste and good manners. He decides he’ll let you stay but keep an eye on you.

Pretty soon he realizes he can’t stop watching you. Your genuine joy with each new piece of art you look at is endearing. Especially as he keeps having to deal with fake smiles and false promises. It also makes your frown stand out even more. 

You walked over to a man who appeared to be taking away a woman who’d drunk too much. While you hadn’t had any of the champagne, you couldn’t imagine it would get someone so drunk they could barely move. You approach, ignoring the glares the man gave you, and ask, “what happened?”

“It’s nothing,” the man replies. “She just had a little too much to drink. I’m just getting her home.”

“She doesn’t look drunk,” you retort. “She looks like she needs to go to a hospital.”

“She’s just a lightweight is all,” he sneers. “I’ll take good care of her. Now get lost.”

“Let me take a look at her, please. I really think she needs a doctor.”

“No,” he barks. “She just needs to get home and get some rest.”

“Walker,” a deep, stern voice behind you started. “Do you need some help?”

“Rogers,” Walker stammers. “Seriously, I just need to get the lady home. That’s all.”

“Walker, if I get security over here and search your pockets, are they going to find some pills?”

Walker stammers a bit before dropping the girl and trying to run for it. He only makes a couple steps before Rogers has him slammed against a wall, signaling security to come in. You’re already picking up the young woman from the floor, checking her pupils for dilation, getting her into a more comfortable position. 

Rogers is talking to a few people as security quietly takes Walker out of the gallery, “Sam, go get Strange or Badr. She probably needs a doctor. Bucky, go get Danvers and Rambeau to come help their daughter.” They head in separate directions and he turns to see you checking the girl. He bends down and turns her face towards him, “Monica, we’re getting your mothers. You’re going to be okay.” She seems to relax at that. 

Before long a few people come over and you step back so they can take care of the girl. You figure you should leave before your status as party crasher gets found out but Rogers gently grabs your arm, making you stay in place as he gets the situation sorted. You try to squirm out of his grip a few times before he pulls you to him and whispers, “settle down, Hummingbird. You’re not in trouble but we need to talk.” You’re unsure where the nickname came from but you take comfort in his words and stop trying to escape. 

They’re getting Monica to an ambulance but a tall blonde woman turns to Rogers, fury in her eyes. He points to the door where security took Walker and she storms in that direction.

Once you’re alone you try, one more time, to pull away, “I guess you should get back to your party, Sir.” The look he gives you makes you freeze.

“I’m not generally one for repeating myself, Hummingbird,” he begins. “But I understand you might be out of your depth tonight. You are not in trouble but we still need to have a chat.”

“Yes, Sir,” you lower your head. 

He chuckles and lifts your chin, “call me Steve.”

“Yes, St…Steve.” 

He smiles at you before turning and leading you to a separate wing of the gallery that had been closed off for the party. You know you should pay attention to him, but your eyes keep looking at the beautiful art around you. When you finally do turn back to Steve his smile has grown.

“So, what brings you to my party?”

“I…I just wanted to look at the art.”

“Why not look during normal gallery hours?”

“Work,” you confess. “I got so swamped I didn’t have time to come see the show. Jack Russell is such an amazing artist and I was desperate for a chance to see his art in person. I put on my nicest dress and slipped in with a small group. I’m very sorry.” You hang your head in apology, waiting for some kind of punishment or consequence for your actions. He said you weren’t in trouble but there had to be some kind of repercussion. 

“I believe you,” he states. “I was watching you almost all night.” You lift your eyes at his words, confusion written all over your face. “You weren’t invited, it’s true, but you weren’t drinking any champagne. You didn’t annoy any guests. You were just flitting from piece to piece, actually enjoying the show. I figured as long as you weren’t causing trouble, I’d let you be. And I’m very glad for that.”

“I wasn’t planning on staying long,” you sighed. “Didn’t want to get caught so I moved quickly between the pieces.”

“Flitting like a hummingbird,” he chuckled. “But in coming here, breaking into my party, you saved a young woman. In doing so you also saved my party and, quite frankly, my reputation. I can’t be known as someone whose parties are unsafe or cater to creeps like Walker turned out to be. As such, I would like to reward you.”

“Um..wh..what?”

Steve’s bright blue eyes seemed to shine with your response. “And I think I know the perfect reward. I’m friends with the curator here. I’ll give you her information and any time there’s a show you really want to see, but can’t get to, call her and she’ll make sure you get in at a time that’s convenient for you.”

“What?!” Your eyes grow wide at his words, “that’s far too generous, Sir! I can’t accept that!”

“It’s ‘Steve’ little Hummingbird,” he lowers his face to your level, his voice lowering with it, “and you will accept the reward. I’ll also make sure you get invited to every party I host at this place. Watching your genuine enjoyment was the highlight of the party tonight. I’d love to see more of it.”

“Are…are you sure about this, Steve?”

Eyes never leaving yours, he gently grabs your hand and kisses it, “I promise, I want nothing more than for you to accept.”

Many thanks @yenzys-lucky-charm for the ask! It really helped push the scales towards making a full mob/mafia AU. 😆

Part 2

Series Masterlist

[minniesmutt]

⭐︎ ━━━ GRANITE

⭐︎ ━━━ SS + WC: 2 + 0.6K

⭐︎ ━━━ CW: drugs, arguing, crying

     “Fuck,” Hyunjin groaned from the kitchen

     “What’s wrong?” Y/n asked from the couch, not looking away from her computer screen. 

     She was eternally grateful to Felix for getting her website up and running. Now she didn’t have to worry and could just work. 

     “Nothing. Just remembered something I was supposed to do earlier.” 

     “Okay.” 

     Y/n kept on working. Believing her boyfriend. It’d been a couple weeks since she found the molly he left out and they hadn’t talked much about it since. Nor did she think much when he walked down the hallway and into the bathroom. However, she did get concerned after about fifteen minutes of him being there. 

     “Hyun!” Y/n yelled 

     No response. 

     She set her laptop to the side and walked down the hallway. She knocked on the door, “Hyunjin.”

     Nothing. 

     She gave it another couple of seconds before grabbing the handle, then she heard the flush of the toilet and then the sink. She still opened the door and looked at her boyfriend. “You okay?”

     “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I?” Hyunjin said and walked past her

     “Because you were in there for almost twenty minutes…” Y/n followed her boyfriend into the living room. 

     “Lunch didn’t settle well with me. I’m fine.”

     Y/n nodded and just sat back down to work. Hyunjin sat with her, turning on the TV and watching an anime they had started while she worked. Work she could barely focus on because her boyfriend was fidgeting. 

     “What’s wrong?” Y/n asked him as she set her laptop to the side. 

     “Nothing,” the singer said

     “You’re fidgeting like you’re hiding something.”

     “Just drop it.”

     Y/n stood up and walked to his bathroom, Hyunjin on her tail. “Y/n.”

     “Either you tell me what’s wrong or I'll find out what’s wrong.”

     The latter seemed to be what happened. Pulling out a hidden baggie of pills and looking at him. Hyunjin avoided her gaze. 

     “You didn't toss the drugs.”

     “Be a waste of money.”

     “So you decided to say fuck your sobriety? After how many freakouts you’ve had about using again?”

     “Why are you mad about this?”

     “I’m more concerned than anything.”

     “Well, take the concern elsewhere,” Hyunjin scoffed and walked back to his living room, Y/n following behind him

     “Excuse me? What happened to the guy who was so worried about what I would think?”

     “Y/n, just leave.”

     ”No. We’re talking this out.”

     “I don’t want to talk this out.”

     “What do you want then?”

     “I want you to get out of my apartment and not come back!”

     Y/n looked at the man in front of her, blankly, “What the fuck is wrong with you.”

     “Nothing wrong with me Y/n! It’s you and everyone else that thinks something’s wrong with me!”

     “Because you’ve been thinking of it and now have relapsed! We’re fucking worried!”

     “I’m a fucking grown man! I don’t need people to worry about me!”

     “We worry because we care!”

     “Well stop! I’m fucking done with all this! With us!”

     “Hyun—“

     “Get out!”

     Y/n grabbed her things as quickly as she could and walked out of his apartment, slamming the door behind her. The tears started to roll down her cheeks. She practically ran to her car and got inside. 

     She sat back and took a breath before it hit. All the heartbreak settled as she fumbled for her phone. Needing someone to ground her. “Lix…”

     “Are you okay? You sound like you’re crying.”

     “Are you home?”

     “Yeah… Y/n, what —“

     “Hyunjin and I got in a fight.”

     “Wait what?” Jisung’s voice came.

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[angelwings-crossbowstrings]

I Get My Lovin’ on the Run

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Setting: The Kingdom

Warnings: Drug and alcohol use

Summary: You and Daryl party a little too hard after a long day.

A/N: This has been sitting in my drafts for a hot minute. It didn’t take much to finish it. It’s just pure idiocy, really. Something funny and exaggerated to maybe help me feel like writing again.

*gif by @heartdrift

It had been a bad day. A long, exhausting, terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. More walkers than you could count. You had stared down the business end of a handgun, not once but twice. You and Daryl had taken a beating, not once but twice. The supplies you had secured on your run had been jacked, leaving the two of you sprawled out on the pavement while the truck disappeared into the distance. The long walk back to Daryl’s bike was filled with alternating tense silence and heated arguments. 

You had parted ways when arriving at the Kingdom, opting to stay in different apartments rather than the shared one that had been set aside for you. You truly had no intention of following through, so you had made certain Daryl had left toward the designated housing. There was something special you had found on the run, small enough to fit in your jacket pocket. The one item you had been able to bring back. 

You weren’t sure of Daryl’s stance on your peace offering but hell, you’d lie on a bed of hot coals if it would cool the animosity between the two of you. You gave him a few hours to calm down before showing up at the door. He opened up after the second knock, giving you a once over before leaning against the frame with his arms crossed over his chest. Your hands came up immediately, palms out. 

“I come in peace.”

“Thought ya was stayin’ somewhere else?” Maybe you hadn’t waited long enough. 

“Come on, Dixon. You know you’d miss me.” He raised an eyebrow in challenge, your bottom lip jutting out. “Don’t be that way. Look! I brought a peace offering!” The little bag dangled between the two of you, two slender white joints inside. Daryl’s expression didn’t change. 

“You’re jokin’.” The archer shook his head and turned to walk away. He didn’t shut the door so you took that as an invitation to follow. The heel of your boot caught the door’s edge to kick it closed before jogging after him. 

“It’ll be fun!” You offered, making yourself at home on the couch. Daryl eyed the bag while you removed one of the joints. “Probably old as fuck, but beggars can’t be choosers, right?”

“Don’t be stupid, Y/N.”

“You, sir, can continue to entertain your attitude of majestic stick in the mudness or,” you waved the offering again, “you can smoke with me so all these bruises don’t hurt as badly and we can forget about this shitty day.” His eyes narrowed while he quite obviously chewed the inside of his cheek. “What’ll it be? Mud?” You gestured vaguely toward where he stood. “Or epic?” You placed the joint between your lips. 

Arms still crossed, the fingers of one hand drummed against the forearm of the other. Just when you thought he might turn you down, his shoulders dropped and he reached inside his vest to pull out his lighter and toss it to you. 

You snatched it out of the air with ease. “Hells yeah!”

Carol had seen you heading toward the apartment earlier after already talking with Daryl about the day’s events. When you didn’t return, she decided that maybe bringing some dinner wouldn't be a terrible idea. You were both pretty banged up and she knew Daryl, at the very least, was in quite the foul mood. She excused herself from her conversation with Ezekiel and Jerry to put together two plates. When she headed over, the two men quickly followed along. 

“I’m sure they’re fine. If nothing else, they’ll enjoy something to eat.” She pacified, knowing full well that she at least wanted to make sure that you two weren’t in the process of murdering one another. Your tempers were equally matched, only rivaled by your stubbornness. 

The three climbed the stairs and were several doors down when the smell assaulted their senses. 

“Alright!” Jerry whooped. “Someone’s having a good time.”

“Ugh, smells like a dispensary up here.” Carol’s lip curled. She glanced at the other apartment doors after knocking, waiting for one of you to call out or answer.

“Enter!” Your voice sing-songed from somewhere inside. 

The moment the door swung inward, Carol put her hand over her nose. “Oh my god.” The entire apartment was fuzzy with a thin veil of smoke. “Daryl? Y/N?” 

“Livin’ room!” Daryl’s voice was as gravelly as ever but something about his tone had Carol’s jaw already dropping. 

“Oh my god, she didn’t.” She quickly placed the plates on the kitchen counter, next to an empty ziplock bag and open bottle of whiskey, and all but ran to the living room with the two men on her heels. The sight had her choking back a cackle, hiding her smile behind her hand. 

You were on one side of the couch, hanging upside down off the cushion with your ass against the back and your feet up against the wall. Daryl, bless him, was lying across the coffee table, one foot propped up on the arm of the couch while the other was settled on a nearby chair. 

“Right on.” Jerry chuckled, smile fading when Ezekiel cast him a stern look. 

“Sup, Jer-bear?” Daryl drawled, twisting around to see the newcomers without lifting himself up in the slightest. You made what you thought resembled bear claws at the man but really just looked like you were trying to tickle someone. 

“Y/N, you I get but,” Carol almost snorted and had to cover her mouth again, “Daryl Dixon, are you high?”

“As a goddamn kite.” He answered after a moment of just smiling widely up at her. She wasn’t sure she had ever seen all of his teeth, but there they were. “Drunk too!”

“He’s not mud!” You chirped, trying and failing to pat his chest when you couldn’t quite reach. Ezekiel wasn’t even aware he had started to smile while Jerry was about to absolutely combust trying to hold in his laughter. Carol, tears in her eyes from the strain of controlling herself, looked from you back down to Daryl. 

“Not mud, huh? What are you then?”

With a slow sideways glance at you that lingered somewhere between mischievous and proud, he shoved a fist in the air. “Epic!” He hollered, his right foot sliding out of the chair. 

“Epic!” You echoed, pushing your feet against the wall so you could stretch your arms and drum both hands on Daryl’s stomach. The motions all seemed so fast to you and Daryl, but to the other three occupants in the room, you were moving in slow motion. 

“Should we, uh, get lost then?” Jerry asked, turning toward the hall that led to the door. 

“Absolutely not.” Carol, still somehow managing to keep her composure, crossed the room to sit on the chair previously occupied by Daryl’s boot. “I brought you two some dinner.”

Your eyes lit up as you let yourself tumble to the floor, followed equally as gracelessly by Daryl. “Food!” You crawled across the archer, who seemed to find it hilarious. “Daryl. Daryl!” Finally sitting beside his head, you were shaking him forcefully. “She brought food.”

“I want pie.” He replied with an expression that was entirely too serious. “Didja bring pie?” The archer reached over to grasp Carol’s pant leg and tug repeatedly. 

“I didn’t, but I’ll make you one tomorrow, Pookie.”

Daryl’s brow furrowed deeply while you lost your mind at the nickname. “Make me what?”

“Pie.” Carol chuckled. This was just too good. 

“I want pie!” He repeated, appearing just as excited as the first time he got the idea. 

“But Pookie,” you placed a hand on either side of his face and squished. “She brought food. Do you know what this means?”

“What?” 

“I don’t remember, but there’s food! I’ll race ya!” 

“Ya win.”

You pouted. “You didn’t even start your engine!”

“Ain’t a car, woman.” He made a show of slapping away your hands. 

“You’re a motorcycle!” You threw up your arms and twisted to fall backwards across his torso while he nodded from his spot on the floor. 

“M’a goddamn motorcycle.” 

Carol cleared her throat, earning two sets of bloodshot eyes to focus on her. “Should we bring your food in here for you?” 

“Ya brought food?”

“She brought food!”

Jerry was barely keeping it together, finally laughing when Ezekiel failed at withholding his own giggles. 

“I would give anything for a video camera.” Carol told the two men while she got to her feet. Reaching down, she pulled on your shoulders and helped you to stand.

“Whoa.” Your wide eyes blinked. “You shrank, Carol.”

“What?” She chuckled, reaching for Daryl, who apparently thought it was hilarious to start wiggling from side to side in order to avoid her. “Daryl! Stop!” She laughed, finally just latching onto one of his belt loops to keep him from sliding across the floor again. 

“Hey! Them’s my pants! Get your own!”

“Yeah, get your own!” You swatted Carol’s hands away from Daryl until she threw them in the air and stepped back to stand beside the two men. “C’mon, Dixon!” Your fingers latched onto the front of his shirt and you pulled, not budging the man an inch. The effort you put into backfired and you lost your balance, tumbling face-first into his chest. 

“You’re clumsy.” He laughed. 

“And you’re standing between me and food.”

“Technically, m’layin’, short stuff.”

“Don’t call me names, douche canoe.”

“This may be the best thing I’ve seen in my entire life.” Carol snorted, wiping the tears from the corner of her eyes. 

“I agree that it is indeed entertaining.” Ezekiel met her eyes with a smile and a nod. 

“Uh, guys.” Jerry cleared his throat and jerked his chin toward the floor. The other two granted him matching quizzical expressions before following his gesture. 

“Oh.” They breathed in unison. 

You were now thoroughly straddling the archer, lips sealed over his and fingers wound tightly in his shirt while his twisted into your messy hair. When clothes started being pulled at, the trio scrambled out of the room in a manner that would have otherwise been comical. 

“Should we stop them?” Jerry whispered after the front door was pulled closed behind Carol. 

“Are you kidding?” Carol admonished with a grin. “I was wondering what it would take to get those two to finally start figuring things out. I just didn’t think it would be a little liquor and weed.”

“I sense there will be a lot to discuss between them come morning.” The King noted with a raise of his brows. 

“Yes there will.” Carol smiled, looking back toward the door before they began to descend the stairs. “I am personally looking forward to it.”

[grxmreaperx]

omg omg loved your NSFW alphabet , pls write something based on T & U !! 🫣😭

i'm so glad you liked the alphabet!! i've gotten a couple requests for this, so i've combined them into this!

Pairing: Mark Hoffman x (f!) reader

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: 18+!! Smut!! Porn with a little plot. Use of toys, fingering (f! receiving), lots of dirty talk as usual

Summary: After a couple weeks of Mark working long nights, you decide to take matters into your hands. It doesn’t turn out exactly as you were planning.

“You better behave or you’re not going to like what happens when we get home,” you heard, your boyfriend leaning in close.

You smiled. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m not doing anything.”

Before he could respond, Rigg made his way over to you, pulling Mark away to say hi to his wife. Mark had brought you to a work event the head of the department had set up at the precinct. You were more than happy to attend with him; he had been so busy at work lately that you had hardly had any time together the past few weeks. You were becoming frustrated after so many nights spent without him by your side. And this was the perfect opportunity to do something about it.

You had purposefully worn the dress you knew was his favorite, knew would get him worked up. He had frozen when he walked into your shared bedroom as you were putting your shoes on.

“That’s what you’re wearing?” he asked, eyes fixed on you.

“Yeah. Why, is that a problem?” You gave him an innocent smile.

“No, no problem.” He cleared his throat. “You just, you look really nice.”

You snapped out of your haze as you heard Eric’s voice calling for you. You smiled at him. You had been to a couple of these events with Mark before, and every time he tensed when Matthews paid a bit too much attention to you.

Perfect.

“Hi, Eric,” you said sweetly.

He let out a low whistle. “You look amazing! Hoffman better watch, one slip up and he’s gonna have some competition.”

You chuckled, taking notice of Mark’s gaze on you from across the room.

You put up with Eric’s flirting for a bit, laughing harder than you normally would have at his lines. You spotted Mark making his way over to you, excusing himself from Rigg and a few other officers, when you lightly laid a hand on Eric’s arm.

You felt his arm wrap around your waist as he gave Eric a stiff smile. “Sorry for interrupting, but we’d better get going, don’t you think, sweetheart?” he asked, shifting his eyes to you. You could tell from his grip on your waist and the look in his eye that it wasn’t a request.

“What? Already? But I’m having such a good time, we haven’t even been here that long.”

He smiled at you. “Yeah, but don’t you have an early shift in the morning?” He began gently pulling you towards the exit, not bothering to say another word to his coworker. He leaned in close, lips against your ear, as you two moved towards the door. “Get in the fucking car. You’re in big trouble.”

--

As soon as you two walked through the front door, he was on you, pinning you against the wall. He lightly drug his lips across your neck. “You think you’re clever, don’t you? Flirting with that asshole just to get a rise out of me?” He shook his head. “You should know better than that, sweetheart.”

He placed a hand around your throat, forcing you to look at him. “I want to go in there, get this pretty dress off, and spread yourself out on the bed for me. I’ll be in in a minute.”

“And what if I don’t?”

He chuckled. “You don’t want to play that game, sweetheart.” He pulled away, and you quickly made your way to your room, following his orders.

You stripped and laid down, waiting eagerly for him. This was exactly what you had been hoping for. You had his full attention, and you loved when he got jealous.

A few minutes later, he sauntered through the door, smirked as he saw how well you had listened. “Oh good, you finally decided not to act like a brat.” He made his way over the nightstand, pulling open the bottom drawer and removing the linen ropes he had bought for you both. You watched intently as he pulled your ankles to the foot of the bed, slowly tying one to each bed post. After he was finished, he removed his belt, pining your arms above your head and wrapping your wrists together. He took a moment to admire his work, examining every inch of you, before moving back towards the nightstand.

This time, he pulled open the top drawer, pulling out your vibrator. Your brows furrowed. He knew you had it, hell, he had bought for you for nights when he couldn’t be there to take care of you, but he had never used it on you.

He saw the look on your face and grinned, tilting his head slightly. “What, you thought you’d get what you want by being a brat? No, no, baby. You want to tease me, make me jealous? Now you’ll have to be patient.”

He climbed onto the bed, settling himself between your legs as he pulled his tie from around his neck. He switched the device on, watching you intently as he roughly pressed it against you. A chuckle escaped his throat as he watched your body jolt slightly, surprised at the sudden sensation.

You let out a moan, grinding your hips, trying to get more friction. He pressed harder, making small circles with the toy around your clit. “Is this what you wanted, baby?”

You shook your head. “Want you…” you groaned.

“Well, you should’ve thought of that before playing your little game tonight, hmm? Bad girls don’t get everything they want.”

You let out a whine, already feeling yourself approaching the edge. Suddenly, he pulled the vibrator away from you.

“What the hell?” you cried.

A smirk spread across his face. “What did I just say? Bad girls don’t get what they want. You want to cum, sweetheart? You gotta work for it.”

You threw your head back, the ache between your legs growing worse and worse. “That’s not fair!”

“You know what’s not fair?” he asked mockingly, pressing the toy back against you. “What’s not fair is that this toy has gotten to touch you more in the past few weeks then I have. And what’s not fair, sweetheart, is that I was planning on treating you so well tonight when we got home. But no, you had to be a brat.”

You felt tears welling in your eyes, wanting nothing more than for him to fill you up, to reach your high with him buried inside you.

He pressed the button again, the vibrations speeding up against your clit. You pulled against your restraints, trying to squeeze your legs together.

“You wanna cum for me, baby?” he asked.

You frantically nodded your head, letting out a stream of yeses. You ground your hips against the machine, feeling yourself getting closer.

The tears fell down your cheeks as he once again pulled the toy away.

“Goddamn it! You’re such an asshole!”

He chuckled. “And you’re such a tease. If you want to cum for me, you have to earn it.”

After a few moments, he turned the toy up to it’s fastest setting and pressed it against you. You writhed on the sheets, tears streaming down your face, desperately trying to find your orgasm before he could pull it away again.

“Please, I’m sorry, sir. I’m sorry for teasing you, please just let me cum!”

“Poor baby,” he mocked. “Now you’re sorry. Tell me what you want. You can do better than that.”

You cried out, begging him not to stop, to touch you. You threw your head back, eyes screwed shut, begging for any sort of relief.

You suddenly felt two fingers press into you, roughly pumping in and out. Your cries grew louder, grinding against his hand, toy still working your clit.

“Go on baby, cum all over my fingers.”

You whimpered, the tension finally snapping, nails digging into your palm as you finally got what you had been aching for.

Your eyes fluttered open, looking up at him. “You’re such a bastard.”

He smiled. “I’d be careful if I were you, sweetheart. I’m not done with you yet.”

tag list: @bee-who-isnt-french, @enigmatic-blues, @aliengutzstuff, @slut4hoffman, @schrodingersjigsaw, @hoffmansnightmare, @karmaswitch, @mrs-hotforhoffman, @returntodustsblog, @kujofam, @du1nyurmum