#you guys alr know jelly

[dio-the-thot-exterminator]

YAYAYYYAYA YOU GUYS IT IS A GLORIOUS DAY!!!!!!!

after years and years of waiting for my coauthor to give me a design we finally have.

PeanutButter and Jelly 🤗

[touyas-multi-purpose-saline]

DAY XIX. — FACE-SITTING

cw: Face-Sitting, Teasing, Attempt at Humor, Fem! Reader. 18+ Only!

author's note: This is for a good friend of mine! I hope you guys enjoy. I think Rappa's very funny.

word count: Approximately 1.2k words.

The door nearly slams off of its hinges, creaking and swaying haphazardly, before a large figure trudges in and closes it—albeit not gently at all. You would have nearly jumped out of your skin, but you’re used to this by now. An aggravated sigh rings around the room before the lumbering figure starts stalking closer. You swivel around on your office chair, hands steepled and brows raised. 

“Everything okay, Kendou?” 

Another sigh of frustration. 

“No. Of course not.” 

Kendou’s answer is curt, and it translates into his movements. He’s quick to tear his mask off and toss it towards a bedside table, and his gloves are clicking and following immediately after. You rise out of your seat carefully, sure not to make too much noise because Kendou becomes a little mean and cold whenever he gets agitated and pissed off. You would tease him usually, but he seems unusually mad. Whenever he notices that you’re approaching him, Kendou’s shoulders sag a little and he meets you halfway. He exhales, but there’s no emotion behind it, and he clasps his hands. 

“Sorry. It’s nothing that you did. I was just tryna do what Overhaul said, but I got duped.” 

You tilt your head, reaching out and placing a gentle hand on Kendou’s forehead. 

“What happened?” 

Finally, Kendou sweeps his hands out in a grand gesture before he flings his body backwards, groaning the entire way down. His back connects to the bed that oh-so thankfully happened to be behind him, and the springs scream out in protest before his body bounces heavily a few times. He’s like jelly, and the sight of it makes your eyes bulge out of your head. Your mouth is open, ready to question him until— 

“It’s that damn new Overhaul’s girl. Everybody thinks she’s Quirkless, but I know the truth! It’s unbelievable the things I’ve seen.” 

Oh, this again. Kendou has ranted about Overhaul’s new sweet thing multiple times now. You’ve not had the pleasure to meet her personally, but you’re not really sure you want to. Apparently she’s managed to convince everyone pretty well… or perhaps Kendou’s just hallucinating. 

“Yes, you’ve mentioned her quite a bit lately. What did she do this time?” 

A strange mix between a strangle laugh and a choked sob reverberates in the back of his throat before he wails his answer out boisterously. 

“Those three blond boys again! She keeps summoning them! And she’s using them to slip past me to escape. The bathtub. The bathtub!” 

You blink. 

“Right, yeah. How could I forget the bathtub?” 

You shift your eyes because you’re not sure what response to supply, but Kendou just emits another strange sound and waves his hands around. 

“Forget the dame! I need some stress relief, babe.” 

Immediately you face him again. 

“Oh?” 

Kendou’s hands flop back down. 

“Yeah. Sit on my face right now.” 

The way Kendou doesn’t ask lets you know that he’s serious, so you don’t even attempt to refute him. He’s impatient, so you’re not even going to have a chance to hop in the shower or anything, so you just wince slightly before you start to peel your clothes off. Kendou tilts his head up a little so that he can watch, and you make sure to wipe the wince off and give him a coy little smile before you teasingly remove your top. Your bra easily catches along, and both articles of clothing are on the floor before your thumbs hook underneath the band of your bottoms and you start to sashay your hips while you lower them down your thighs. They fall the rest of the way to your ankles, but you don’t stop twirling your hips the entire way. Your hands are trailing up your belly whenever you casually step out of your bottoms and stalk towards him. 

Kendou’s already hard—you can see his erection straining against his baggy jeans the closer you approach. Seeing his cock already pulsing to life has electricity tingling underneath your nerves, so you pick up the pace. Your hands are on Kendou’s knees before you tap your fingertips against their curves, and then you start to fondle up his thighs while you crawl up and over him. Kendou loosely lets his hands splay across you, feeling and caressing whatever flesh he can while you cross him. It makes you bite your lip, one incisor poking out and the other rubbing against your mouth. His calloused hands feel terrific on you, the way they hiss, the way they feel so heavy and real against you, the way he grabs you. Kendou’s got your blood boiling, and your coy smile turns a little predatory. You chuckle. 

“You’re so eager, big boy. Have you been thinking about this?” 

Kendou grunts.

“All damn day. I hate being assigned to her. You’re an angel compared to that.” 

His comment sends more thunderstorms crackling down your body, and you moan quietly before you start to shimmy up. You straighten, attempting to fluidly lock your legs around his shoulders and neck without looking awkward. Kendou watches you, those golden hues on his face brilliant and shining. You can see emotions brimming to life in those pools of honey, and you can’t help the heat that blooms in your heart and blossoms out to your groin. Another moan, and your palms are sensually rolling down your breasts, thumbs flicking pert jewels, and then down your abdomen before they reach Kendou’s jawline. He leans into your touch, chest heaving and breath speeding, and your smile returns to its kindness whenever you coo and start to cradle his face. 

“I’ve been daydreaming about having you all day, too, Kendou. Can’t believe we both get what we want.” 

You wink, and Kendou releases a genuine chuckle and he smiles. He looks so handsome, broad and chiseled, whenever he does, and you flutter. Your cunt clenches, and you can already feel glaze smearing along your cunt’s lips. 

“Like a dream come true, doll. Now c’mon, I hate waiting.” 

Impatient like always, but you don’t mind indulging him after such a rough and arduous day. Your toes curl in delight, so you lift up on your knees and slowly ease your way down onto the lower half of Kendou’s face. He soon disappears, lidded eyes open and glossy with excitement. Kendou’s gaze never leaves yours, and the intimacy has you gasping—especially whenever he kisses your cunt. He fondles your lips, pulling and tugging, letting his tongue slip out of his mouth to swipe a few loose licks. Gasps keep slipping out of you, so you bite the inner wall of your bottom lips and groan into sealed teeth. 

He’s fluid like always, kissing you in ways that you would have never thought possible until you met him. That eager tongue doesn’t waste any time cleaning you before his mouth shifts, catching your now throbbing clit into his maw. It’s too much, and you cry out. Both of your eyes squint in ecstasy, but you don’t miss the mirth and twinkle that sparks alive in Kendou’s gaze. You moan.

“Kendou, don’t you mess with me or I’ll—” 

He slurps, cutting you off, and you soon regret your words—

After all, he’s quite the hungry man. 

[webslingingslasher]

hiii it's sleepover anon again :’) another long update ahahah. i was able to talk to them the day after my bday thru vid call!

they basically said that they were talking abt me bc it was just randomly brought up when they were tgt waiting for me to arrive to bff1's house on the day of the sleepover/dinner party, and they thought that me being delusional over the guy was funny.. i mean, sure yeah it is pretty funny but 1) someone *must* have brought it up bc how else would that convo even happen while they were waiting for me 😭 i don't believe it was "random".. 2) they were still laughing abt me behind my back ? i mean, yk we could've done that together lol bc i rly was silly ngl. but i said that i'm not ashamed about it even if they think i was being too much bc first of all that guy actually showed interest and he implied lots of times that he did like me sooooo it's only natural to feel that way ? 🙁 i wasn't going to not let myself not feel anything abt it bc i just wanted to have fun 😭 and even if he was sus, which we all thought at first b4 i got close to him, i stuck around w him bc he was the only person i knew in one of my classes cuz we were also classmates in the previous term.. then we got close bc we helped each other n yk stuff happened but it was also for the sake of common decency. and i rly was just fucking around to find out bc i wanted to know even tho he was sus.. and now i know and there's actual proof that he's just not it. i wasn't going to cut him off or smth without reason or proof lol i'd end up being the bad guy despite what we all thought ab him at first :// but now i do have a good enough reason that i can back up n thats why i stopped talking to him. simple as that

also bff2 alr felt bad enough bc she realized that drunk her isn't a good person so i didn't feel the need to crush her abt the stuff she said abt our other friend lmaooo.. i could've but nah she was alr depressed enough i'm just glad she's aware now. i did mention it tho and i said it was just plain mean..

but it's also quite funny to think they were making fun of me for being so head over heels when they don't even have experience 😭 they don't even know what it's like to have someone interested in them at least.. like one time when i was talking to him for like 2 whole days, bff2 once told me she was jelly of me and him bc she's never gotten to talking stage w anyone.. n then after all that they were laughing abt me like lol ok :\\

anw i just told them that i don't appreciate how they talked abt me without my presence bc whatever they said to each other was smth they could actually say to my face.. it's smth i'd laugh abt too yknow.. but they apologized tho which is good but honestly i don't rly trust them now after all that.. their insecurities spilled onto their perception of me + our other friend like yikes i don't rly want insecure friends who laugh abt me behind my back i want supportive and non-judgmental ones!! it's not even hard to be kind 😭 glad i went to that sleepover n that i went thru him tho even tho it was just bs bc i found out the truth abt my friends.. bottom line is i don't have trustworthy friends so i'm just going to keep my distance.. we r still 'friends' i don't want to cut them off but i'm just not telling them anything anymore and i'm not talking to them unless they msg to talk to me first or if i need them for smth lol

anw thats it for this whole drama thank you sm for listening omg HAHAH 😭😭💗💗 also jsyk i am one of the emoji anons haha i just didn't rly want to associate the drama w it but yes. tysm for the safe space u created on here<33 and thank you for taking ur time to always talk to us even if it's a lot to go thru one by one🥹🫶🫂❤️‍🩹

WAIT UR AN EMPJI ANON?????? NAH CAUSE NOW IM TRYA FIGURE IT OUT

also!!! let’s go boundary queen!!! nice to know it was all bc they’re jealous.

[luvrblythe]

grumpy, but still beautiful || gilbert blythe x f!reader

this was more jealous reader instead of jealous gilbert, but oh well, what did i expect, really

warningss : more cussing (from me again), that's all i think

— i decided to write a real jealous gilbert x reader bc i got side tracked last time

— lets hope i actually stay on topic this time

— sooo

— i feel like gilbert wouldn’t actually do anything if he’s jealous

— if he even gets jealous that is

— like he’s very confident in your relationship and he knows that you would never ever look at another guy the way you look at him

— maybe in different circumstances he’d get a little jelly

— maybe like if you’re having problems and you’re falling apart or smth like that

— and it's rlly bad like y’all barely talk anymore

— and he sees you laughing with another guy

— actually i feel like he’d be more hurt than jealous

— noo:((

— so in conclusion, gilbert blythe is a confident boy

— HOWEVER

— if you got jealous

— HAHHAHAHAH

— smuggest little bitch in all of avonlea

— he wouldn’t let you live it down for weeeeks

— and even after that he’d bring it up at the most random times

— like this one time

— “andd done!” he cheered as he finally finished his essay for school

— “now you can stop with your whining.” he said moving closer to where you were seated

— you ignored him lmao bc he was working for hours and neglecting you

— but you weren’t rlly upset you just wanted to tease him

— “come onnn, no need to be all pouty. since when did you become all fussy?”

— “‘m not being fussy,” you huffed facing him 

— “maybe i just prefer having you all to myself.” you mumbled, shrugging one shoulder upwards as you slightly turned your face away from him

— “oh, darling, i know you do..” he smirked

— “gilbert blythe i swear—”

— you knew where this was going

— “remember that time when you—”

— “gilbert that was three months ago!”

— yeah

— he gets all cocky about it and all

— but he knows you well

— he reassures you when he knows you need it

— and for some reason he always knows when you need it

— its like his sixth sense or smth

— if you’re being all pouty again and being silent

— furrowed brows and the lot

— and you’re fiddling with the ruffles on your sleeves

— and you didn’t wanna make a fuss

— but he also didn’t wanna be all straight forward with it so

— he pulled out his classic blythe charm

— and hugged you from behind

— slowly bc he wanted to be romantic

— pressing a kiss to your temple

— let's say you were standing in front of a bush

— he reached a hand forward

— and plucked a flower from the bush

— then tucked the flower behind your ear STOP OMFGGHHFGF

— then he loosened his hold on you

— and turned you so you were facing him

— and the second you looked up at his face you finally let out the smile you’ve been suppressing

— its alr babe me too

— he started smiling as well bc omfg he made his darling happy 

— he will never get tired of seeing you smile

— “there she is, my beautiful girl.”

— you hit his chest and scoffed

— playfully ofc

— he groaned and held the part of his chest that you smacked

— it didn’t hurt he just wanted to be dramatic

— “grumpy, but still beautiful.”

[thekitschdiet]

the kitsch diet part II

part one alr posted!! this chunk is about 3,000~ words long... let me know what u think :-) thank u all for all the luv already!!! looks like I really will hit 31 followers by easter!!!!!!!!

  Who is the Kitsch Girl? 

 I think this is more loosely defined, but The Chic Diet did a truly admirable way of reducing a girl to her YSL bag and her really skinny legs. Now, that implies an archetype, or a population in a specific location. I think kitschness is kind of the niche you fill when you’re not really much of anything else, sort of your own conglomerate of mainstream-specific. One major requirement, though, is being a little too into something somewhat uncool. And the whole illusion falls apart if you have any sort of outward insecurity. See, the Kitsch Girl is somewhat undefinable because she is so much of everything. She exists in multitudes, in a way that is also quite simple to understand; think of a list of axioms, or principles to live by. And now add a section to each one that says “but…” to make a collection of verified exceptions. Say, the kitsch girl will never wear jeans. But she thrifted this pair of vintage flares she just loves. She doesn’t reply to texts efficiently, but sometimes she will within a couple seconds. No mascara, no dinner forks, candles are to be collected not burned; but that was a gift, or something. It’s not personal, of course, those are just the contradictions she exists in. Don’t try to understand it, the enigma is essential to the facade. Or maybe she just lives like this, and her character is so homogenous with her inner world there’s no sense in trying to separate it. You have to have a little bit of an individuality complex about the whole ordeal, which is normally so eugh, but if you’re kitschy enough it works on you. Trust!The Kitsch girl is not someone unlikeable, but amiable and well heeled. I double checked that last one, assuming it meant liked by most, but apparently means affluent. I suppose that is an aspect of the kitsch girl too, having seemingly endless frivolous expenses with no real strain, but that’s not important right now. People that don’t like her think so out of jealousy, or something. Envious that her clothes are all kind of shake-it-up-esque and her highlights desperately need touching up, but she still seems so enthralled with the whole of life… How does she enjoy her own company so much when other people want to know her better? Doesn’t she feel weird about blowing people off to make a joke about reading Kafka in the bath? Why would she document her cluttered, unexciting life on Instagram so delicately, so vibrantly? Of course, no one would say this to her face because they are really baseless claims. She’s nice, generous, and valuable to have as a friend. Trade-offs exist, as they do with anyone. But I like thinking it’s easier to overlook a forgotten birthday when your kitschy best friend gave you a multi strand pearl necklace to celebrate the welcome breeze of June. Or some other made-up holiday. She is so unassuming if you’re not really looking. Girls want in on her inner circle. Or they just don’t care. Nothing wrong with being liked or thought of naught, for the most part. Boys are either enthralled or repulsed by her. Her doctor knows her as something of a hypochondriac, but only minorly. It’s just carpal tunnel, don’t worry… The sales staff at CVS turn a blind eye when she slips an eyeliner pencil into her tote bag. She shoplifts on occasion, just to see if she still knows how. But she is not a shoplifter. $9 here and $6.45 there doesn’t really add up to much. Everywhere she goes, she makes a tertiary friend or two. The term of friend is loosely used here, of course. But it is nice to tell a stranger you like her earrings. Or her phone case is so fun, is it Wildflower? The kitsch girl has an eye for this kind of detail. Simply put, she is sort of unspectacular. But in a way that makes you sort of wish you knew her better.

Phone cases

The phone case is, like, religious for the kitsch girl. Sorry, but there’s just no other accessory as flippant and expensive and single-purpose as a trendy little iPhone case with some semitacky stickers plastered over the design. I used to have an iPhone XS- extrasmall-  with like, 18 phone cases. It was kind of a sordid affair. I jest, but really… owning that many phone cases was kind of sick. We get it, you are frivolous and spontaneous and sooo stylish! Stop posting mirror selfies on your Instagram story, your crush isn’t going to see it. Kidding again. Having an extensive collection of phone cases is just so fun because while attainable, most people just simply do not partake in it. That makes you kitschy and unique. I really thought I had more to say about the IDEA of the phone case, but I guess in practice it is all very, very simple. You can slide your driver’s license in the back of a clear case. At what point does it stop being cool to have legal operational control of a vehicle? I don’t display mine because I don’t really like the photo. I look round. In the eyes but also just in general, swollen, unglamorous. Whatever. Not like I drive a Nissan or anything. I drive my *Mom’s* Nissan. Playing Bladee in the car seems sacrilegious. She would hate it.Back to phone cases. Sonix ones are cute but kind of overpriced retail- unless you have like, an iPhone 12 Pro Max or whatever the fuck is new this year, just go to Winner’s. They always have Xs and 11 cases. I had a cherry one for my previous phone, like the exact one Lana Del Rey had? Thank god I sold it before she got outed as a copfucker or whatever. Casetify is for an inadvertent flex. Flexing your lame, lame taste. Sorry, I know you bought it because you liked it, but what you failed to consider is just how un-Kitsch they are. SO common, and they advertise on Instagram. Sorry, I just can’t get into it! Kind of how I just never liked the Brandy Amara tanks. Or lowtop converse. Otterbox is just distressing. Like, if my boyfriend gave me an otterbox phone case I would probably break up with him because somebody clearly isn’t paying attention- one of my favorite, potentially overused joke is how Otterbox cases are the equivalent of orthopedic insoles. Sorry but if you have poor arch support or whatever, but no pain is worth giving up a good pair of Margiela slingback tabi heels. Obviously I couldn’t afford that right now because all loose income goes directly to Wildflower and my cig boy. But like, one day. I hope you want to punch me in the face a little bit after reading that.  If Wildflower isn’t your thing, at least have the decency to get a beaded phone strap. But not from String Ting. Pray tell you aren’t keeping score, but they are one of my several parasocial enemies. That should have been ME collaborating with Wildflower! Should have been ME mailing shit to Caroline Calloway (more on her later, but she is the only blue check I follow. I adore her! I was on her patreon for a bit I thinkl!!) …. Side note. Phone cases are cute but there is no way to properly protect your laptop without looking just absurd or colossally lame. The foam sleeves… ick.

Having the shittiest music taste ever

So like, here’s the thing. I’m an Apple Music user, which sort of reinstates my status as an unironic My Bloody Valentine Hyperpop Death Grips kinda gal. Read; volcel. My most recent conquest ended up being a huge L on my part, but also… I totally dodged a bullet. The guy had an iPhone 11 (female trait) and didn’t know who Rei Brown was, which just seemed suspicious given his Niche. I just know he had a “making out playlist” comprising entirely of like, Joji. Which isn’t a bad thing I guess but so unembarrassing it horseshoes back to being humiliating.Like I said. Having the worst music taste. It’s nice how subjective and deeply personal your music taste can be; no one really Needs to know you’re a die hard drainer. But there’s also no point in being a die-hard drainer and Not capitalizing off it somehow. I added it up and I have well over 150 hours of just Bladee and Yung Lean. Which is so yass? The more I write, using myself as a case study, I realize just how desperately jobless I am. And Yogenfruz isn’t even hiring! UGH!I think there is something very kitschy about liking hyperpop in the least ironic, least obnoxious way. Sort of feeds into a “I’m not like other girls” thing, but I mean… That’s kind of the idea of kitsch, isn’t it? Be a little different but also the very same as your lipgloss brethren?!Side note. If you make monthly playlists I am genuinely kind of afraid of you. That is just so organized!! I just make playlists with esoteric titles and then make a new one when I’m sick of the stuff on the last. I have exhausted most genres but I think my favorite is the “I’m wearing f****ng air forces and my teeth are SO white”. Guess what genre it is. Or don’t, but it’s probably what you think is. Okay, moving on….

Curating a scent

I like thinking I smell like mango and peach, Glossier you, whatever citrus is in that Lush shower jelly and mint 5Gum. But of course it is probably less distinct and just kind of generally fruit-floral-mint. Anyway. I think Glossier You is the perfect scent for anyone with a rather elementary understanding of the whole.. Perfume business. Every bottle of intentional fragrance I own was made via aesthetic choices… it really helps that Glossier You is so cute And so universal. Now, Glossier is kind of interesting to me because it really is at the intersection of cheugy and kitsch. Kind of basic, overplayed, unspectacular. But also…. Often popular things are popular because they are good. Glossier has excellent customer suurv, they ship SO fast (and no import duties! W!) and their stuff is just so sweet and nice if not unoriginal, in kind of the same way strawberry ice cream is. Which is still my favorite, of course, especially if there’s a vegan option. I was talking about Glossier. What the hell! It’s really worth trying out. A huge principle of kitsch is just… having as many possible layers and appendages to your composure as possible. And adding a signature scent just really completes that! When curating your own, I say this as a complete amateur, know-nothing; make it something that comes kind of naturally to Your Character. Like, I’m just not a Chanel No 5 kind of girl. Odds are you aren’t either. My bottle (before she asked for it back when I told her I didn’t use it, in exchange for a Nordstrom’s gift card) was from my grandmother. Ummm.. Yeah, I really have no expertise in curating a scent. But it is nice to have a signature. And having a bottle displayed on your dresser next to your aughties McDonald milkshake themed beanie baby and a handful of lip products is just way too fun! This is the kind of girl I am, everyone! Cluttered, but prioritizing pretty-delicate things!

Cheugyism

Cheugy is a relatively new word that has unfortunately wormed into my vocabulary to replace “uncouth”. Which I use to mean graceless or tacky, but if that isn’t what it means…. Don’t tell me. That would hurt more than weighing myself after a “feast” slash pastry binge at my dear Grandmothe’s house. Like I was saying. Cheugy. It’s sort of a fucked up concept to me because it is a critique on consumption, but not the pace or volume or magnitude of it. But rather… the idea of not being “good” enough at engaging in microtrends, or involvement in the fast paced fashion cycle. Don’t get me started on TikTok, or do, but… yeah,. No. That will require a cigarette because I’m so sorry, but writing a thinkpiece on social media is so lowbrow I would need to find about six ways to aesthetically counteract it…. Moving on.  I think the idea of cheugy is good, we really do need a word to simply and efficiently define “out of date/uninspired/lame”. But the way it is used to shame others for not liking the same trends or whatever is kind of gross. If you use cheugyism to put other people down and not as a neutral identifier umm… you will become what you fear. Sorry, that’s what happens. Some things that I think are cheugy or embarrassing, or just not part of my stylistic lexicon are… 1. Hooded or zip up clothing, or things with a large graphic on the back. Bingo if it's all three! I just can’t get behind it. Side note, my summer home outfit is brandy sweats and a tube top (Urban Outfitters tank I ripped the straps off) and a large cardigan that should have belonged to a stoner, but probably didn’t. I can dunk on bulky, uninspired clothes because I would honest to God NEVER be caught DEAD out of the house wearing any of it. I’m so serious. Next segment should be about the kitsch girl’s inadvertent affinity for diuretics. Remind me….. One of the ports of my laptop is dead. Not really sure what to do about that.

Eye makeup and what it means to me….

Personally, I am one of those people who never wears foundation and kind of has a complex about it. The kitsch girl wears fluffy eyelashes and owns a plethora of sparkly eyeliner. Or maybe she doesn’t, but she has something distinct and a little ritzy, if not haphazard. We all saw Euphoria and it like, totally imprinted on us. The way glitter sits on your face after a long day is so resplendent. When it’s shining and a little bit melted off from your long, semi-productive day… ugh! Just made for film. Pictures on film. But not the Prequel app. I keep getting fucking ads for it. But it’s so embarrassing. Like, isn’t the whole point of film the authenticity of the moment? The texture of the afternoon? Why would you fabricate that? Prequel is just so cheugy. More on that later. But anyhow. Wearing a ton of eye makeup kind of fits with the idea of film too I think. Like, look at you, in the moment. With your strip lash falling off! It’s all so tres-chic. Plus, for whatever reason, it’s kind of unique or notably dedicated to ~Pull up to the function~ with more eye makeup on than everyone else. Sorry, but it really doesn’t take that long! But yes I will gracefully accept your praise… it’s kind of like the dropshipping of complements if you think about it. Easy to source with little to no effort in the curating. Side note, lashes are like $20 for 40 weeks if you cut them in half and use each pair about 5 times. You could probably do more but I lose track. How the fuck is it almost June? I was trudging through the snow to check the mail for my Online Ceramics shirt just last week, I swear. The trick to cutting your lashes (the way I do it anyway) is pretty simple. Get out two lashes that are symmetrical. Find the middle and cut one slightly to the left and one slightly to the right. This means you have two sets (one set is a little more dramatic than the other but at least they are symmetrical) with longer outer edges. Glue this to the outer corner of your eye and you will look so Composed… obsessed with how this layers with three eyeliner tails (one traditional one pointing up and one pointing down directly below it, sort of like the tail light on a 2019 Lexus UX) and one below your eye, like a clown. Fun, irrelevant fact, is the first time I added this third tail to my eye makeup, my dad had just gotten home from the hospital because he was sure he had like appendicitis or something and it was actually.. Not that. Typical indie hypochondriac. He made me bring him cottage cheese on a plate with a teaspoon that evening. I put black pepper on it for flair, which he hated. Walking up and down stairs with a plate of cottage cheese is much more imprinting than most of the multiplication tables. Don’t forget to use a bright shimmer eyeshadow in your inner corner. It really opens up your eyes. I recommend Too Faced.  One time I got a little bit too high and tried to film an “editorial” makeup tutorial. You will never, ever, ever see that video. But I essentially covered my whole eyelid in the ABH shadow “palermo” and smudged out the edges with a tan Tartelette Toasted shade, coupled with my long-expired Milk Makeup holographic stick. Lopsided lashes and near-blinding eyeliner experience aside, it was kind of cool. My point is, you really cannot go wrong with an arsenal of shimmers, taupey mattes and a good eyeliner pen.

[xllxxrbxg]

so ayon nga hehe

so ayon nga mga marecakes hehe narrate ko na lang nangyari today.

so i was like chilling today right im all set for school because i did my homeworks naman days before it was needed so i was like, "aight lets get this shit today". tapos karlo message me he wanted cuddles eh i was like hMMM... we just made out the other day eh and its like tuesday palang today !! i told him nalang na make it happen, not rlly thinking he would make it happen. but this mf took it as a challenge and actually made it happen.

before all that tho i was badtrip because ha made a very uncalled for rape joke and it fucked me up in the head, plus the fact na im being taken to someplace unfamiliar. i was very tensed the whole ride there. anw he didnt get the hint na it was THAT awful to me, but its aight we resolvedt it already. i'll keep a tab on this tho. for me that was a red flag.

anyways we made out in this tambayan place their family owns. basically it has a large parking lot and across that space was this little studio type housie house. the place had a large ass gate, wasnt really paying attention to what he was saying about the place because i was still tensed with the bad joke he made. anyways we went in and it was a very nice place. outside the house, it wasnt that obvious, but when you go in, it legit looked like one of those sala sets in malls with the note "thank you for not sitting" typa shit. so yeah it was nice it had same vibes with vista mall maybe because of the ceiling yellow scattered lights and of the fresh ass furniture and the whole place itself. it was a pretty decent size, not too big not too small for at least two people to share in the long run. it also had this aircon i always wanted the expensive ones u see in 5 stars. anyways it was quickly cold. there was also the bathroom that had a shower, then theres this chair where you pull a button and a foot rest will pop up lmfao. there were also two other sofa charis by the window. the window was the type then you push back up, not much windows tbh. but thats aight and reasonable since it has an aircon. i was tensed at first when the room was opened. it was obviously recently used idk maybe by his relative. WAS TENSED BRO same feeling when you enter an empty room newly unlocked by your teacher. THAT. that typa anxiety. anyways eventually joined him to sit by the small bed. was pretty much good for one big ass person to comfortably lie on, but fitted both of us nicely. didn't really bottom at that sesh so i don't really remember if the bed was uratex when weight is applied on me but it probably is AHSHDHASHDHSAHDSAHAH ok mej funny yun goiz liek- HAHA ok serious na nga hmpz. we cuddled first before doing nasty stuff. it was nice. i'd exchange all those laplapan just to wholesomely cuddle in peace and probably have a great nap together. i like the feeling the warm feeling. it was nice. yes. anyways,, yeah it was nice. cant stop talking about how nice it was because it was nice. heck... it was so nice. it was so heart heart. idc about my coochie getting rubbed, CUDDLE ME BITCH. anyways we started kissing and the rest is historyYYYYYY. jk. basically the make out routine starts with cuddling then kissing then he touches me until it reacher the forbidden softie softie, main bec he likes hearing my sexy ass moan. even before in tinder when i vm my boytoys for the first time the first thing they say my voice is smexy. cant blame them i agree. even when im alone and i randomly fake moan gat dam bro i get turned on too LMFAO. so yeah i moaned bec it was music to his ears and turned him on big time. was ngl kinda steamy when we breathe in each others mouth thats one of my favorite parts of it and also when i suck on his tongue. or also when i moan into his mouth. yep. also when he cusses it means im doing a great job. hehe. nice stuff ryt there. we pause sometimes to rest, then go aead again. i got many rounds that day. we did same stuff on the bed several times. then he pulled me so i'd be on top. im such a great top bro he aint know hoe to topppp. then was cuddling on top of him and then accidentally (wink wink) grinded on his rock solid stuff. he was turned on sabi nya shit anuyon sabi ka ah ayaw mo ok BUT THEN he was like gusto ko. tnagina pabebe yarn. anw i started kissing then grinding and he was cussing bec im so good at it. later my pants were off and later his shorts too. so we were underwear-away from grinding on directly. was nice got me tiredt. THEN HAHAH i saw this 5 peso coin by the bed and i was like eto yung token sa rides AHSDHASHDASHDHA WOF YAN TEH? tangina tawang tawa sya gago ang funny ko tlg san ka makakakuha ng kallapan na funny. tas nilagay ko sa gilid nya singko started grinding again. bet u he was grinding too. AND IT WAS SO HARD IT LOWKEY HURT TO GRIND ON. GEEZAS. so basically the whole bed was shaking. and i did my deed as a good girl to keep the music on (aka moaning) because there was no music. felt like

asmr. boring af. unlike when we make out sa car, theres always music. i like making out on the white chev instead of the fortuner BECAUSE THE FORTUNERS WINDOWS AIN TINTED what in the world was i thinking making out inside an untinted car INSIDE A PARK WHERE THERE ARE LOTSA PPL PASSING BY. anyways back to the bed, we paused, cuddled. then i was badtrip again for some reason so i got up to get dressed but we eventually made out again on the sofa hehe. legs spread again bec he liked touching there so i let him. then eventually was begging me to allow him to eat me out but i was like BROOOO NOOOO you gon taste it and it be not groomed yet in anyway but he was alr there begging looool he looked so adorbs but NOOO. i asked wala ka man benefit jan, sabi nya ikaw meron. tas sabi ko why do u wanna do it, he said he wasnted to satify me liek HNGGGGGG ok i would let you but it really not be groomed oakay NEXT TIME for sure. AND HECK the lights were on. it was daylight and the lights were on like hasdhahsdhashdas it feels liek im being eaten out at the home decor station at vista mall U GUYZ. anyways ayon. after non i think he tried carrying me for some reason. and i knew he found me heavy lols. but yeah i was a cute little moment he carried me around the room pretending its a mall and he's touring me and shit, "to your left, is the sala set, to your right is the flat screen tv..." things like that HAHAHA funny cute moment. anw later on we found ourselves sitting on the little bed again i was on top of him. he didnt want to lay down bec he alrady made the bed lol so we started grinding again sitting, me on top doing my best !! giving my all !! bec he also had a finger down there as i grinded on his stuff so it basically felt like a direct grind lols. anyways was nice. then later on we made out standing up. was kinda hard because he was 7 inches taller. OH AKALA NYO TITE SIZE YUNG 7 INCHES NOH. hinde. so ayon we were making out and he was shy to ask for a deep throat HAHSDHAHDHAS HECK NAW BITCH U TOLD ME A RAPE JOKE. so this is the part where i get revenge. he was standing there, and i was teasing him. was acting clueless, but he hinted he wanted his belt off so i took it off. was honestly confused with the belt. lol. anw i got to remove it and said, so ano next? playfully hhehhehehe. anyways ayon nga eventually me teased him everrr soooo slowly his dick went from solid-jelly-solid-jelly. LMFAO omfg will i cause him illness? omg. anwwww ayon. later on i removed his shorts as he asked. then i stepped aaway from him across the room because he was doing the shy type hands while hsis shorts was by his foot. and i LOL'd at him for a good few minutes just clapping my hands out of entertainment HAHSDHAHSDAS. then he asked me to put my hands inside, did it slowly and i told him to smile ka nga muna. AND HA THE MF WAS SHAKING. LOL. my fucking powerrrrrrr. anyways later on i was teasing out the underwear, then later i got my hands in again and then touchedt the dick *YAY* finally we got there!! anw it was only for a few secs and i told him its over HAHAHA. then i put his shorts back up again, but subtly teasing that i would suck. bec the shorts were by his ankles so i had to kneel. did i suck? no. did i make sure he thought i was? YES BITCH. and then he lay down fretting because i didnt suck his dick and then while was laying down i opened his shorts again to pretend that his dick was a computer mouse and told him "lets play solitaire, o kaya counterstrike or maybe purble place. gawa ng cake hehe" lmfao mfer be cry laughing because he dont know what to do bec he was teased. so ayon we ended that way and i thought he was bad trip bec of what i did. but he assured me na di naman like dapat lang duh. anyways ayon hehe.

uwi na kami after nakauwi ako 1. andon kami 10. hehe. hinatid nya man me pauwi. tho yung byahe pauwi di pa kami nakakalayo sa place he pulled over so i was confused bec there were no big vehicles incoming but to my surpris he started kissimg me again lol bro deins ka ba nasasawa. anw yon. was nice naman. making out with a guy from a rich fam is nice bec yall dont need to pay to rent in motels lol but still has pressure, bec if we end on a bad note, i swear most of the blgs here are engineered by his relatives. thats how prominent they are. the place we went to is owned by his uncle, who works at legazpi rn thats why the place was vacant. theyre making a mall i think idk. so thats why his uncle is making another like that na place dun. so he has somewhere to stay. like what in the wealth... its crazy how people have money. and for sure even if the place we stayed in was small, it costs millions fr. anyways ayun yung promised detailed chika ko. hehe ciao. mej pokpok nga me pero look at me suffering the consequences, may sipon na ako aside sa ubo because he had mild sipon. now my sipon is malala compared to his, and he alr is recoveredt tangina unfair. but yesterday he insisted to see me to drop off some meds and he hugeed me and cried. because i asked for a time out the night before. bec i was having a hard time. he allowed it but over thinkedt it so yeah he cried while hugging me tight in the car. and kept on saying sorry mainly bec of the sipon thing. but it was, i felt, directed to the other stuff he had disappointed me with. anyways before that sabi nya ok lang ba sayo mag punta munang emall may bibilhin lang, sabi ko naur im sick. it was bec he wanted to buy me gummy worms lol. cute. u shoulda bought them before going to me, mofo. jk. loveee u penggg.

[shijiujun]

2020 Because of You: Episode 3

Overall feel of the episode: Mehhh didn’t really like the pacing although it was quite cute to see CP2 and CP3 interacting with each other, I mean, no depth but what is depth in this drama right, but we’ve got stalker YJC hanging around LX and gotta say the Yuan brothers are all quite quirky

YJC big bro: YJC confuses me a little bit because he’s kind of like I guess he’s interested in LX (altho hopefully not romantically now cuz there’s the POSSIBILITY OF LX BEING HIS BROTHER, we know that’s not the case but he doesn’t) and he’s... seeing him as some sort of like social experiment which is kind of hilarious, and in tmr’s episode we see YJC stepping on LX’s BUN like DONT TREAT FOOD LIKE THAT YOU BIJ and manhandling LX but i guess this is how YJC treats his brothers - He ignores the kidnapped one, then tries to fight the potential 4th one

YJD 2nd bro: OKAY THIS BOY IS AMAZING OK THE SHAPE OF HIS FACE IS AMAZING!!!! WILL IS AMAZING like he is so handsome?!!! Honestly when the cameraman does an updown shot on the stairs I’m like OOOOOF FACE AND JAW but okay not cool that he’s jelly and possessive but I guess he’s always been like this to Xiang Shi, and omg I didn’t think Yu Chen (who plays Xiang Shi) was handsome in the beginning but he’s quite cute in this ep too th way he apologises to YJD ALTHO BRO U GOT NOTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR YOU AREN’T A PRISONER IN THE HOUSE HAHA but okay i guess compromise

YJP 3rd bro: Wow, dumb and dumber. Dumb to the point of cute, I LOVE IT. Honestly, this boy BREAKS INTO SOMEONE ELSE’S HOUSE AND RUMMAGES THROUGH THE HOUSE AND STEALS THE PERSON���S FRUITS LIKE?!!! and he mothers Yue Rong too I’M LIKE BRO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF FIRST!!!!

The 4th son saga: DO WE MOVE ON?!!! NO WE DO NOT. YJP is still is disbelief that LX could be his brother, YJD straight up kidnaps him, YJD DOESN’T CARE ALL HE WANTS IS XIANG SHI’S ATTENTION and i gotta say that YJD has got his priorities right like who cares about another brother and another woman my dad is the king of been there done that in this aspect, not much YJC and LX interaction in this ep tho

What happens in Ep 3:

LX has begun talking to himself to cope, and he still remembers to be kind to the beggar crouching outside his house (okay in terms of best spots to beg at, this isn’t a good spot, you usually go to spots with greater foot traffic?) and gives him all of his change

And YJC WHO IS LURKING LIKE A CREEPER sees that and goes like ERROR 404 CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHY LX WOULD GIVE HIM MONEY and then LX laments his lack of lunch money at his bike, and says to his mom ‘i’ll live well mom, i’ll go earn lots of money etc.’ (and well he does live p well and earn a lot of money i guess at the end of this - just marry a rich chaebol, check both boxes)

Then YJC GIVES THE GUY MONEY TOO BUT LIKE A LOT OF MONEY HAHAHAHAHA 

then we have CP3 being dumb and cute in the library as Yue Rong gathers like this info pack on LX

WE ALSO FIND OUT LX IS VERY GOOD AT STUDYING LIKE SUPER SMART

and Yue Rong has a habit of biting at his nails, so Jun Ping hits at his hand every time he does that altho in the first instance in the beginning of the episode, JP actually bites at YR’s fingers and says it’s tasty and im like IT ISN’TTTT BROOOOO

they break into LX’s house and Jun Ping makes himself at home and finds a pack of fruits and unceremoniously starts eating amen this boy i mean like SAME HERE but you’re so damn rich go get your own damn fruits!!

Yue Rong goes through LX mom’s diary and they find out she’s their dad’s childhood friend, and they spend like one-third of the episode rationalizing that Dad really didn’t know about LX and that LX really could be the 4th son and YR bites at his fingers again LMAO

And Jun Ping is like damn it so from Yuan No. 3 I’m now Yuan No. 4?!!! Yue Rong is like PRIORITIES?!!! 

On the CP2 side: We’ve got Xiang Shi fixing up the computer or something for Yue Rong’s sister, and they’re all cousins or something, and she wants to thank him by idk, flirting with him, and Xiang Shi is like you crazy woman?!!! Anw Xiang Shi tries to go home, but the sister sprays like perfume on him and says that she’s curious as to how Jun Dao will react when he smells perfume on Xiang Shi omg do you rich people NOT HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO

And anw Jun Dao is panicking and all because it’s so late and Xiang Shi isn’t home, and he called a few times but he didn’t pick up (AND I HAVE ONLY JUST REALIZED THAT THIS BEAUTIFUL HUGE ASS HOUSE HOUSES ONLY XIANG SHI AND JUN DAO but also where are all the servants you’d think there’ll be help to just kind of push the ‘we are rich’ image in our faces) - Jun Dao of course jumps immediately to ‘hey dont tell me he’s been kidnapped?!!’

XIang Shi turns up at home and they kind of get into an argument of where he’s been and JD does smell the perfume and he gets a bit jelly that XS went on a date, and when XS tries to go upstairs, JD grabs at him and pulls, and XS idk sprains his ankle or smth LMAOOOOO

and OMGGGGG JUN DAO IS SO CUTE SITTING OUTSIDE THE BATHROOM waiting for XS to finish showering, like wrapped like a burrito in a blanket, and anw when XS comes out he ices his ankle, and XS apologises cutely, saying that he should have told JD that he was coming home late, and JD is like, ‘it’s fine, we’re childhood friends so there’s no need to say all these’ but dude you kind of hurt him

and then we have YJC BIG BRO waiting for LX to turn up back in the parking lot AND OMG BIG BRO FINGER GUNS ARE SO LAST GENERATION!!! HAHAHAHA lmao this is hilarious like lee si kang is very handsome doing that but...

Next ep: We’ve got CP3 trying to do things but they’re dumb and dumber so i doubt they’ll succeed and anyway BIG BRO YJC is alr like stepping on LX’s bun and draggin him into his car amen

[shijiujun]

history3 ep 9 summary - AKA SHAO FEI IS JEALOUS FOR 26 WHOLE MINUTES

GUYS YOU GONNA DIE OF LAUGHTER THIS EP OMFGGG WTF JUST HAPPENED?!!! although the jealousy was a bit much man

WE START OFF WHERE WE LEFT OFF LAST WEEK - OFFICE + ANDY

we start off with the massage scene again and oooh seductive andy’s tone as he tells tang yi to relax - nice hands and totally hypnotising YOU GO ANDY

bodydumb and shao fei teaming up is hilarious AND OMG so andy bends down to the floor like we all saw last week, and that’s when both bodydumb and shao fei literally gasp like HORRIFIED and just barge into the room to grab andy up and shao fei is all “what the fuck are you doing why are you crouching down what position is this?!”

CUE SLY ANDY JUMPING UP, POUTING AND THEN HIDING BEHIND TANG YI: “ah yi, this person is so fierce i’m so scared”

shao fei: “i’m now tang yi’s bodyguard and i feel that you’re dangerous and problematic so leave right now”

bodydumb at shao fei: “hey why are you snatching my job?!”

“WHAT’S WRONG WITH THE BOTH OF YOU, AM I BACTERIA?!” - ANDY at shao fei and bodydumb WTF HAHAHAHAHA

omg andy is squatting down on purpose to fuck with them I LOVE HIM

THE NEXT SCENE - they move to the restaurant and geez where is andy GIVE ME MY ANDY but anyway SHAO FEI IS TOTES ANGRY AT TANG YI AND THEY’RE AT THE RESTAURANT AND OMG BODYDUMB YOU HAVE BEEN UPGRADED TO BODYGUARD HE TOTALLY SAW THE ATMOSPHERE AND WAS LIKE ALRIGHT TIME TO FUCKING EXIT instead of sitting around and watch th both of them

omgggggg shao fei is so jealous he’s eating so damn hard and noisily and tang yi is just laughing at him and he CHOKES HE FUCKING CHOKES because he’s eating so damn hard and angrily and tang yi just laughs at him he can’t take it anymore

tang yi insists that they’re friends - shao fei is like: “what kind of friends? there are the ones that go for karaoke, the friends that you exercise with.... and then then kind that do the OTHER kind of exercise, which kind are you guys?!” and after a while of him just talking tang yi interrupts him and goes: “are you trying to understand or are you jealous?”

SHAO FEI, WITHOUT HESITATION: “BOTH!!!!”

and then he denies it as he mutters to himself, and just look at how gleeful and happy tang yi is wtaf and then shao fei goes on and on about how andy has a boyfriend and what if his boyfriend came to find trouble with you? you already have so many enemies, now you want to add on another love-enemy?”

tang yi: “you’re thinking too much”

shao fei goes on as if he didn’t hear him: “you never know, things are crazy nowadays, did you see the news?!!!! etc. etc. especially because you’re so charismatic?!”

and tang yi just takes the praise in stride it’s amazing - and then because shao fei is so damn angry tang yi i think purposely picks up shao fei’s coke and drinks it with the spicy dish they’re having, and as expected, shao fei pauses in his tirade and goes: “hey, you’re drinking coke now?”

and tang yi NODS

OMFGGGGG CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT - TANG YI IS SWEET!!! and shao fei spoils the moment (or makes it better, it’s up to interpretation): “you’re drinking my saliva (from the coke)”

OMGGGGG THE LADDER BODYGUARD DUDE IS QUITE HANDSOME TOO NO?!!!!

JACK is totally jealous that zhao zi is touching some other dude’s pecs and man-boobs, so he’s totally like come touch mine zhao zi don’t touch that old man’s!!!!

jack: “if you want, you can come check mine (muscles)”

he’s totally flirting, but zhao zi is like: “okay! you promised, no take backs, you can’t be shy on me later” 

jack: “me? i think you’re the one who will be scared” (BECAUSE THEY ARE THINKING OF DIFFERENT THINGS)

zhao zi: “this is nothing, back in the academy, i’ve even seen guys butt naked etc. etc.” - dear lord zhao zi you’ve got no idea, you’ve got NO IDEA HOW MUCH jack is thirsting over ur ass

more zhao zi and grandma backstory: SNIFFLES grandma died in his second year of police academy and paid for his education, but didn’t live to see him graduate, and i SWEAR IF JACK DIDN’T ALR LOVE HIM HE DOES NOW?! 

OMG ZHAO ZI CAN U BE MORE STEADY THAT WASN’T LIKE A FLIMSY LADDER?! anw they fall into the pool like in the trailer and omg i love them, and because jack is wearing a white see-through shirt which is totes translucent when he stands up from the pool and zhao zi is totally drooling at his man-boobs and then jack goes: “you’re kidding, you want to check now?!”

HONG YE walks past with Dao Yi, she’s here to discuss smth with Tang yi and waiting for him to come back and then she sees Jack and Zhao Zi in the pool and is like WTF - zhao zi recognises her face from interviews and tv that she’s done (probably for the company etc.) and intros himself as a police and then she ‘s like HMPH WTF and then stomps into the house

LOL - “HONG YE LOOKS LIKE MY GRANDMA” - ZHAO ZI QUOTE OF THE YEAR he’s damn lucky hong ye wasn’t in earshot when he said that she would have DESTROYED HIM

i wanna explain more about hong ye and glasses guy dao yi but i’ll do that after i get this out in full - in any case, she wants him, he obviously likes her, but refuses to be her boyfriend because he is having a dilemma, considering that he’s watched her grow up and also protected her since she was younger in a sense, he’s finding it hard to decide whether to treat her as his charge or a woman that can be his girlfriend

LOLOLOLOL

OMGGGG HOT DOCTOR?!!!!!!!! 

tang yi: “we’re here because i need to repay a debt”

shao fei: “what debt? why must you do it here?”

HOT DOCTOR POPS UP: “because there’s a bed~” - wow hot doctor way to go way to make shao fei go even more mad and jealous

OMFG - SHAO FEI’S EYES WHEN TANG YI STRIPS OFF CLOSE YOUR DAMN MOUTH FLIES ARE GONNA GO IN

OMFGGGGGGGGGG SHAO FEI PLSSSS

you guys can imagine what happens inside and what shao fei hears before barging in, things like “oh this is my first time, am i using too much force? etc. etc.” - of course, of course 

after shao fei barges in, gapes at tang yi, tang yi shooing him off cutely like he would his husband or lover, and then shao fei stomping out-

doctor dude at shao fei: “wow, wasn’t he a bit too angry?” - YEAH DOC YOU DON’T SAY

HE’S STILL ANGRY OMG SHAO FEI - “is your body meant for other people to touch?!!!!”

OH JESUS BASICALLY TANG YI SHRUGS OFF HIS JACKET AND PUFFS UP HIS CHEST AND GOES: “here you go, you wanna touch?!!!”

good on you shao fei, you didn’t take the bait like zhao zi did - he stomps into the house, goes to the fridge, grabs a drink, and then while pouting and obviously jelly still, he presses the drink to tang yi, and tang yi SMILES omgggg he’s killing me with his smiles

omg poooooor bodyguard - he thinks tang yi doesn’t know that shao fei likes him, so he’s trying to tell tang yi that shao fei has other motivations against him aka shao fei is lusting over him, but tang yi already knows?!!! tang yi tells bodyguard that if he cannot control himself, he’ll transfer him out of the house

OH SHIT: bodyguard goes outside, idk who the hell he is talking to but he says over the phone - “hey, it’s me, do you have time to meet?” - he’s definitely meeting a bad person, it could be hong ye but at this point it doesn’t look like it but it could be anyone’s guess

scene at tang yi’s office - he feels the tension between hong ye and dao yi, and basically she wants to make dao yi jealous and mad, so when dao yi suggests a project for tang yi to do, she steps in and goes: “i don’t think we should spend so much money on the project, can you loan me some people and i’ll do a site visit myself to check?”

and then she sees shao fei buddying up with the guy outside - LOL SHAO FEI LEGIT IS GANGSTERBAIT?!!!! EVERYONE ELSE LOVES HIM AND HE’S FRIENDLY W EVERYONE I HOPE

she sees him and she’s like: “i’ve been really good haven’t i? then i wanna go shopping, i want officer meng to guard me while i shop”

and dao yi is like GASPS: “no, miss, i’ll-”

hong ye: “it’s such a waste for a policeman like him to just stay in here doing nothing, he might as well protect me”

shao fei in the end, even though he protests a bit, but - omggggg the way shao fei listens to tang yi without much argument i love it, tang yi says that protecting hong ye is like protecting her, so shao fei smiles, nods, and goes, but not before saying to hong ye: “what is the worst that could happen (on the trip)?” - WOW FORESHADOWING, GOOD JOB SCRIPTWRITERS FINALLY ON THIS PART

i kind of liked this scene because it shows us the hong ye-shao fei sibling rivalry dynamic - challenging, but healthy challenging rather than heated, harsh barbs aimed to murder each other

okay at this point: we can CONFIRM more or less that the person on the photo isn’t glasses guy Dao Yi, because right after hong ye and shao fei leaves, tang yi is very friendly and warm towards dao yi: “if you won’t promise her, you can’t blame her for treating you like this”

dao yi: “it’s not that i won’t, it’s that i can’t”

tang yi: “if you think too much, you’ll just hurt each other”

it ends there - so GUYS we know we have the shooting tmr and hong ye’s shady scene, i really don’t think hong ye is evil at this point, but she could be doing something she thinks is in tang yi’s and the organization’s best interests, but is doing more harm than good - during the earlier scene in the ep w her and dao yi, dao yi mentions that she shouldnt be so concerned with how other ppl will view Xing Tian Meng and whether they would wanna do business with them because their company and the organization is all legal and clean now, so there’s no matter - but then hong ye replies: “that’s only when we’re FULLY legal and clean, not now” - it’s strange that she would make such a distinction, so i guess she is doing something shady but not totally evil, and my take is that when shao fei gets hurt for it, she feels guilty 

or she could be the person bodyguard is meeting?!!!

OR MAYBE I’M THINKING TOO MUCH INTO THIS GUYS

[shijiujun]

history3 ep 6 - i’m sorry

HAHAHA gosh okay so there’s this thing - i get a deathly case of secondhand embarrassment and WOW this ep’s restaurant scene is the epitome of that and i couldn’t make myself go through it and had to quickly press press press the fast forward button to get to the end because obviously shao fei has no idea what he’s doing and tang yi is totally like regretting his decision to come out and eat with shao fei so I’M SORRY GUYS I REALLY CAN’T TELL U WHAT HAPPENS IN THE SCENE OTHER THAN SHAO FEI AND TANG YI ORDERING FOOD

but i did make myself sit through the part where shao fei moves over to sit on tang yi’s side of the table and tries to feed him. i can see the total regret on his face.

LOL okay i think one of the touching parts of this episode is when shao fei returns to the team and he’s obviously scared of police chief, so he asks the girl junior who obviously has a crush on him where the police chief is, and if he’s in a good mood today - police chief appears right behind him and yells “not good!”, and shao fei tries to get out of it by 1. reminding police chief that he should concentrate on his daughter’s (i think, pls correct me if im wrong) wedding rather than his SMALL little mistake 2. he’s still sick, running a bit of a fever and his arm hasn’t healed BUT obviously police chief doesn’t give two shits and hits him where it hurts

police chief: “the previous time you wrote 3000 words (for his apology/reflection letter) and you obviously haven’t learnt anything, this time you wanna write 5000?”

shao fei: “oh come on, you can’t just increase the word count from 3000 to 5000 at a go!”

and then police chief drags him to interpol and the head/chief there to apologize for jeopardising the operation they were on, and obviously the chief ain’t happy with shao fei, calling him impulsive and unthinking of his actions as he not only jeopardised the previous mission for thailand, but this one as well - police chief, awwww he’s a softie and obviously cares about shao fei a lot despite how much he yells at him, says, “sir, shao fei is actually very hardworking and serious about his job”

to which the interpol chief threatens police chief, that if he doesn’t control shao fei, he’ll go to their bosses and tell them that they aren’t working together anymore and replace the investigative team with another one, so police chief has no choice but to promise that this is the last time that shao fei will do smth like this again

and awww outside, police chief smiles and praises shao fei for not talking back to the interpol chief, and shao fei admits that he was at fault, and then cheekily says that, well the interpol chief isn’t police chief - police chief scoffs and goes: “so you’ll be obedient in front of him but because it’s me you always talk back and argue with me?”

cue the light hitting again, and shao fei says that’s not the case, it’s because he knows police chief is the best, and thanks him for having his back inside, and police chief obviously is happy but pretends to be irked - awwwww they obviously care about each other a lot and police chief has a soft spot for shao fei despite everything - of course, because with the way shao fei works i’m not sure if i was boss i wouldn’t have like gone out of my mind

they return to the cafe/restaurant the previous mission was at, before shao fei and tang yi were kidnapped, to see if there are any clues as to who abducted them both and just as shao fei is talking to zhao zi, he turns around and catches sight of chen wen hao - and okay he’s cute but srsly what would him yeling at chen wen hao and catching up to him do at this point? of course chen wen hao leaves before they can catch up to him

whoooo cool mob boss tang yi - i’ve got to admit that chris wu in this role is damn excellent and he’s got the mob boss vibe in this case - he asks jack if he’s found out who abducted/attacked him, and jack says he needs a bit more time, and tang yi goes: “i hope i won’t be waiting too long.” 

they get to the store and LOL as expected shao fei is there waiting for him with a GAUDY AS HECK SUIT OMG FLOWER PRINTS SHAO FEI FLOWER PRINTS AND TANG YI IS LIKE “it’s not suitable” and okay fine shao fei you win with that cute pout

so shao fei puts the suit back on the racks and thank god, and you can see that tang yi, consciously or unconsciously, is super amused by him. at this point i don’t think tang yi likes him that way yet, but he definitely has a soft spot for him whether he knows it or not - anw tang yi smiles and sits down and asks: “so what is it today? did you pick up something else of mine? or are you going to bring me for ‘coke + add spicy’ (referring to the earlier scene where they’re eating and shao fei is feeding him right, basically while i was avoiding the scene as much as i could, shao fei was showing tang yi (against the man’s will LOL) how to eat spicy food and then washing it down/adding to the effect with coke)?”

anw gosh shao fei always asks the same questions, so he asked if tang yi really had nothing to do with wang kun cheng’s death, and then to catch tang yi’s attention he says that he’s figured out who abducted/attacked them that day - that it’s chen wen hao and shao fei (correctly) guesses that tang yi was there that day to catch a glimpse of him after getting word that chen wen hao might turn up

tang yi, as always, neither confirms nor denies, just asks: “why are you saying all these?”

shao fei bb basically points out that tang yi more or less challenged and fucked with chen wen hao directly, and shao fei doesn’t want tang yi to be defeated by the man so early in the game, and tang yi is like “i’m not worried”

shao fei goes to sit next to him and i like that they’re really quite comfortable to the extent that tang yi aint like about to throw him off the couch and shao fei just does it without thinking of the distance between them - and omgahhhhh he stares at him for so long, and when tang yi asks what he wants to ask for real, shao fei simply sighs and says, “these past 4 years, no matter what i asked you, you always have this (poker) expression and i’ve resigned myself to the fact. i’d rather do my own investigation and find out, or.... wait for you to want to tell me.”

OH MY GOD THAT’S KIND OF... THAT’S TRUST MAN. THAT’S TRUST. and okay i may be reading too much into it but i think tang yi seems a bit surprised and touched in a sense, maybe that shao fei actually does know him q well or that shao fei actually left it at that instead of persisting in asking him questions, either way MY HEART-

shao fei goes back to the station and the team is having a meeting - they’re doing another undercover stakeout thing at a bar and police chief singles shao fei out and reminds him that he better do his job properly this time - and his cover is gg to the club with the junior as couples and LOL the club scene - i think wearing the couple pink shirts are like the girl’s idea, and shao fei is like: “isn’t wearing this a little bit ridiculous” YES SHAO FEI IT IS pink shirt and striped long sleeved underneath?!!!!! gosh

and whooooooo wow i gotta say, tang yi has got fine taste in friends - the FWB guy he’s with, he looks pretty good in that top and lol shao fei’s face when he sees tang yi come in with the dude - okay so the guy right, aside from being tang yi’s FWB, i think he also occasionally helps tang yi with his requests for e.g. in this case, tang yi says to him while playing darts that he wants him to find out who attacked him, and the guy goes, “you’ve only just come to see me and you want me to work :(((, didn’t you miss me?”

and tang yi is like, “you sure you want me to drop by often?”

pretty guy rolls his eyes and goes. “whatever. everytime you’re here trouble occurs”

and okay i think tang yi sees shao fei, and anw the junior leans real close to shao fei and drops the information that tang yi is very popular, and he sleeps with both women and men and look at shao fei’s JEALOUS FACE THERE’S NO MORE ESCAPE FOR YOU

AND OMFGGGGGG TANG YI - UNEXPECTEDLY HE SAYS SMTH NICE ABOUT SHAO FEI - okay so while tang yi and pretty guy are dancing together, pretty guy also mentions that chen wen hao met someone at the cafe/restaurant place, and tang yi smiles and says that he knows already, and pretty guy who i’m pretty sure is tang yi’s occasional informant for information, he’s like, “you already know? who told you?”

and tang yi just smiles, and pretty guys KNOWS he’s like “you’re such a player, did you find another guy? that guy is better than me?”

ANOTHER GUY REFERRING TO SHAO FEI, AND TANG YI SMILES HE’S ALR IN QUITE DEEP BUT HE DON’T KNOW IT YET, BUT HE SAYS, “that person, he’s impulsive, stubborn, troublesome and childish, but...”

“...he’s pretty okay.”

HE’S FOND OF SHAO FEI LOOK AT HIM YOU CAN’T TELL ME THAT HE AIN’T FOND OF SHAO FEI OKAY and pretty guy hears it too, he says, “well it sounds like the both of you get along pretty well.” AND TANG YI DOESN’T FUCKING DENY IT WHICH MEANS HE AGREES!

anw they catch sight of each other and tang yi idk what he wants to do but he deliberately like caresses pretty guy’s waist and then shao fei COME ON YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT KINDERGARTEN NURSERY SCHOOL STUDENT HUG and of course tang yi is like hah, lemme just kiss the dude

and woohoooo the bad guys turn up and the entire team is on alert including shao fei - i think tang yi didn’t know that he was there for an assignment until he saw people moving around and okay MAY I MAKE A COMMENT ABOUT HOW DAMN OBVIOUS THEY ALL ARE ISN’T THIS A COVERT OPERATION AND THE CLUB IS SO DAMN SMALL ANY ONE WITH EYES WOULD’VE SEEN THE COPS FROM A MILE AWAY

soooooo... hope you guys have seen the previews for next week’s episodes 7 and 8 and FARKKKK i can’t wait - shao fei is jelly that tang yi is chummy with pretty guy and i guess hong ye as well, and he’s going to be even more embarrassing at least for the next two episodes, but the good news is the plot has moved and next week shao fei is moving into tang yi’s place OMGGGG and we get more jack x zhao zi!!!