#you dont forgive someone who steals from your family and kills them. you fucking kill them back

[ear-motif]

how does one cope with knowing that every moment of their happiness can only exist with the continued exploitation of colonized nations. like even if i kill myself it wont be enough and even if i devote my life to change it wont be enough because all forms of my happiness are predicated on theft and destruction.

[bigtittydemonwife]

Yandere creeps? 👀

Of course! since you didn’t specify who you wanted I decided to do Toby, Masky, Hoodie, Liu, EJ, LJ, Jeff and Jane

Ticci Toby

Honestly it wouldn’t take much for this man to go yandere honestly. Just show him kindness. He’s been shown cruelty his whole life so someone treating him with basic decency and not expecting anything out of it? Yeah he’s in love.

While he will treat you like a queen, if you fight back you will be punished. He doesn’t want to physically hurt his S/O, but he’s not below anything mentally. He will murder your loved ones right in front of you. All while saying things like “It’s you’re fault, I’m the only one who is allowed to love you”

But if your completely fine with being with him? (Don’t @ me I know there are some of you out there) He’s so happy! Expect cuddles everyday, they’re mandatory. He’s still possessive as all hell though. While he trusts you not to run away he does NOT trust others to not steal you away. No matter what you’re leaving the house for he’s coming with you. Taking out the trash? Wait for him. Getting grocery’s? Let him get his shoes. This leads to quote unquote dates a lot.

He needs you with them so don’t ever try to leave, love him and you should be fine. But don’t think it’s all happiness. He’s a PTSD ridden Schizophreniac with most likely trust issues and intimacy issues. There are days where you can tell him you love him a thousand times and he’s yelling about how you’re lying. But in a hour he’ll be back crying and begging for forgiveness.

He struggles with emotions so remember, he was major trouble showing love. The way he does it headpats, cuddles and not murdering you.

Eyeless Jack

Now this man is a mystery rapped in a enigma rapped in a riddle. For him, its tougher to figure out why he’s obsessed with you. But I’d say its how you are psychologically and what you’re life’s like.

Maybe its because of how generally kind you are despite knowing how shit life and people can be. Maybe he wants to protect the innocence he used to have?

Who knows. But as with Toby, Mans Possessive. Not in a lock you up kinda way (That would come later). But stalkerish. You may think you’re alone but you never are. Man knows you’re whole shecdual. And while he won’t KILL anyone who hurts you, that would draw way to much attention. But what he does is much worse.

He probably takes the longest out of all the creeps to show himself to you. And not even in person. He’d start with notes. If you return his feelings your safe and now have a cannibalistic stalker protector. If you don’t......well...We’ll unpack that someother time.

Masky

Again, Show him kindness, But its still a little different from Toby. If you fully understand what he’s done, the person he is. But still think he deserves kindness. He thinks you’re naive. Yeah, He starts off thinking your fucking stupid. Starting.

But as it goes on, and you continue to show him kindness. Even when you know what he’s done, He starts to warm up to your kindness. But if you witness him cold blooded murdering someone. He’s ready for you to leave. But if you dont. You still treat him kindly. He wants to save this nativity. Being naive in this world is a death wish. So he’ll barely let you leave the house. And he’s always with you. Unlike EJ. He will murder anyone who fucks with you. And leave no evidence behind. As far as anyones concerned they’ve dissapeared from the earth.

Once again if you love this man. You have to put up with this. No negotiations. He loves you and thats how he shows it. But if you do put up with it. And show this man all the love. Maybe it will be alright.

But like EJ, Never try and leave him, Unlike some creeps he will hurt his S/O physically, but then will cry into their arms begging them to forgive him. Or a different punishment might go an NSFW way if you know what I mean.....

Hoodie

Again, Complicated. His obsession probably comes very quickly. Someone whose creative like him, Who questions the bigger things in life. Someone he could have a intelligent conversation with.

He’s a stalker. He watches his S/O all day. Nothing they do could bore him. But he gets jealous very easy. Why else do you think the cute person in the library that gave you their number hasn’t come back? Or hasn’t texted you?

He’s probably take a while to show himself to his S/O. And once he finally gets the courage. He’ll send them a letter. You two’ll become penpals. He’s kept every single one of your letters and keeps them in a folder.

He does have trouble showing his emotions though, Showing his S/O He loves them would be returning letters, Giving them small trinkets (like a magpie) and not murdering them.

Prefurs not to hurt his S/O, If they try to run away he’ll just psychologically torture them. Following them and disappearing when the call the police. Making them think they’re the only one who can see him. Anyone who they care about disappears. But this only happends if you run away and don’t love him back.

So love him and you’ll be good....you’ll just have to deal with Possessiveness, Paranoia, Obssession, and Jealousy.

Jane The Killer

With most of the creeps. Be kind to her, But not just her. If your a generally kind person who shows others respect but refuses to to bow down to bullies. Shes in love

Shes quite quick to talk to her S/O, She’ll ask for they’re number, and because of how normal she looks (And how pretty she is) you say yes.

Late night texts about random things, if you rant to her about your interests she could listen all day.

(To quote The Killers) Jealousy

Its her life quest to keep creepers who remind her of Jeff away from you, Speaking of Jeff is he ever went near you shes starting a riot.

She loves cuddles, intamacy is a must. She needs you to stay near her. Once again won’t hurt her S/O but if they try to run away they’re getting locked in a room alone untill they’re begging for her to come back so they can hear someone’s voice that isnt their own and touch them. She’s not above depriving her S/O of intimacy should the moment call for it.

Possessive. You need her and only her. Everyone else doesnt matter. Show her love and no one else.

Jeff The Killer

He’s most likely to become obsessed with someone whose nice to people. But will fight a bitch. If your sassy and don’t take shit he’s in love. But remember hes a twisted psychopath who murdered his family and his neighbours. His love isnt what you’d call socially acceptable. He’d kill for you in a flash. Anyone, people you love or hate. They’re dissapearing.

Unlike the others, he won’t show himself to you quickly BUT he will not hide his love. Scribbled love notes written in blood. Dead animals on your porch. He’s kinda like a dog.

He will hurt his S/O if they don’t love him, Mentally or Physically he doesnt mind, He see’s it as a necessary step.

He needs physically affection.

Isnt a soft relationship to be honest. Cuddles and kisses yes. But no soft words. Just sass, violent outbursts, Hate sex, Angry sex, Makeup sex. Yeah lots of sex.

He’s a horndog what can I say?

But maybe, just mayyybeee once In a blue moon, you’ll be cuddling and he’ll think your asleep, and whisper he loves you in his ear. Pretend your asleep though.

Laughing Jack

He needs someone he can laugh with, Someone with a sort of wonder to them. He likes those type of people.

Since he’s a childs imaginary friend(?) He doesn’t really understand love, But obsession? Yes.

He’s not gonna show himself to his S/O for ages. I mean, Hes like a seven foot tall clown. Total boyfriend material.

He’ll leave candy on your doorstep, Or cute little trinkets, Like music boxes.

Gives the best hugs honestly. He’ll lift you right up off the ground and spin you around. Honestly he carries you everywhere like a princess.

CARNIVIAL DATES.

Anyone, literally anyone makes you feel sad or makes the wonder in your eyes leave. They’re loved ones are getting turned into candy, then they’re forced to eat them. Then they get murdered gruesomely. He’s all you need and he’ll protect you.

He loves to slow dance with you. He’ll play some old classical music.

(I headcanon he has a British accent)

He’ll cut you off from all your friends, or make them disappear, He’s all you need.

Homicidial Liu/Sully

(Its so hard to find good gifs for these boys)

This boy needs a hug, Him and Sully.

Stalkers. They need affection. They’ll follow they’re S/O wherever they go. No mater what they do.

They’re S/O has a partner? Not for much longer.

Liu gives cute gifs and notes like Flowers, or shiny trinkets, Sully gives weirder stuff, Like random stones or shiny things. And his notes are scrubbed much more.

Nickname them Magpie they’ll love it.

While Liu is defiantly the more sweeter one, He’ll never hurt his S/O, but he will score them if he must. Sully on the other hand, all for scaring them. Despite what others think he loves them, and he doesn’t want to hurt them to much because he wants them to be his. And they can’t be his if they’re dead.

You know all the jealousy I said Jeff had? Imagine that but doubled.

Thats your realtionship. While Liu will be more defensive if someone’s hurting or flirting with you. Sully aggressive. Back away from whats his.

[faithinthefuture28]

Larry songs timeline & what it tells us about the evolution of their relationship

**These are all just my interpretations but the more I listen to the music they wrote, the more it all fits together. ESPECIALLY BECAUSE THROUGHOUT THE YEARS THEY’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT WRITING “AUTOBIOGRAPHICALLY” AND “FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE”

I deffo missed some songs but these stood out to me:

2013

L-Strong: Love isn’t easy (waves trying to break it) but what we have means something and it’s worth fighting for. read: love is only for the brave (Think of how much love that’s been wasted...there’s nothing i’m running from...i don’t care, I’m not scared of love) And we bring out the best in each other so lets not throw this away (i’d do anything to save it...when i’m not with you i’m weaker). 

H-Happily: I want to fight for us too bc we’re on fire and our love is powerful af. ik we have to do stunts and stuff (and if (s)he feels my traces in your hair, sorry love but I don’t really care) but what we have is insane and fuck everyone else bc you’re MINE and i’m YOURS at the end of the day (i wanna be the one who holds you when you sleep). Together, we’re magic so just be with me so happily

H-Something Great: ****this song is very straightforward so i won’t explain it much***** (i want you here with me like how i pictured it so i dont have to keep imagining... We’re better off together here tonight). Written as a longing for what could be if they dont have to suppress the relationship. (script was written...want to rip it all to shreds) Louis’ response (you’re all I want so much it’s hurting) basically says “it’s not too much to ask babe, i want it too.” This has the kind of longing that ‘wouldn’t it be nice- beach boys’ which Harry has admitted is kind of a theme song. 

L-Through the Dark: I know all this bs we’re going through is taking a toll on you and hurts you and i hate seeing you upset (you tell me that your sad...you tell me that you’re hurt and youre in pain and i can see your head is held in shame...i just wanna see you smile again) but I will do everything physically possible to protect you from any pain bb (i’d never let you fall and break your heart, if u wanna cry or fall apart, i’ll be there to hold ya). We’re going through this together and I will take on any responsibility needed to keep you happy.  I’M WILLING TO GO THROUGH HELL TO FIGHT FOR US HARRY LOVE (entire chorus basically).

L-Better than Words: holy fuck our love is amazing can’t even describe it can i just sing to you foreva love u babycakes

L-Why don’t we go there: what if...we just forgot about the world and escaped and enjoyed each others love and rode the high??? Also sex

2014

L-Ready to Run: *******Followup to Why Don’t We Go There*********** But this time let’s escape for real bc (there’s me inside a sinking boat running out of time). Like i’m ready to get out of here and it could just be us living happily ever after (this time i’m ready to run). Honestly nothing else makes sense (without you i’ll never make it out alive...wherever you are is the place i belong). I know what i want out of life and IT’S YOU HARREH (i want to be free and i wanna be yours, i will never look back). 

L-Steal My Girl: all u thirsty hoes find someone else bc Harry is MY pretty princess. Srsly ask his family. But you can still admire how he looks in those jeans. We all do. You know the ones

L-No Control: boy u fine, let’s do what lovers do IN THE MORNING. bc we can. also you own me and i am urs

L-Clouds: WE KNEW THIS WAS GONNA BE HARD SO WHY ARE YOU BEING A LITTLE BITCH (you dont like it complicated...but love is never ever simple...you are tired of all the changes, but love is always always changing). We could be great yo, just keep fighting (if we’re never coming back down, we’ll looking down on the clouds...we go and we go and we dont stop)

H-Where do Broken Hearts Go: IM SORRY LOU BABY YOURE EVERYTHING (rest of my crimes dont come close the look on your face when i let you go... the taste of your lips...is at the top of the list of things i want). H&L’s call and  response at the end is basically forgiveness and acknowledgment (come on baby come and get me out, come on baby cuz i need you now)

H-Two Ghosts: *****was written around this time according to Harry******. This is fucking hard yo. We’re drained and exhausted and idk how much more we can fight for this... (it’s not you and it’s not me...sounds like something that i used to feel). That infatuation and electricity and hope that fueled our younger selves isn’t really there anymore and i’m just tired man (we’re just two ghosts swimming in a glass half empty, trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat, we’re not who we used to be...this was all we used to need). We’re empty vessels going through the motions (same eyes blue, couple more tattoos). AND WE AREN’T FUCKING COMMUNICATING (we dont say what we really mean). 

2015

H&L-Perfect: so what if... we get rid of the pressure of forever? What if we just have fun doing the stupid shit we love and makes us feel alive (trouble up in hotel rooms, secret little rendezvous, things you know that we shouldn’t do). Like we won’t be out of each others’ lives, I’m still around and we can find comfort in each other and even mess around here and there (I can be the one you love from time to time). Remember how we used to be young and EXCITED (when i first saw you from across the room, i could tell that you were curious) let’s get that energy back without the responsiblity of an adult relationship. And we can keep making art lmao (if youre looking for someone to write your breakup songs about). 

L-Long Way Down *****this song fkn hurts man. It’s overlooked a lot but shows so much insight**** We were...everything. And maybe that’s the problem? We’ve been through so fucking much, more than anyone our age should have to endure. (We've been in fire, Went down in the flames. We sailed the ocean And drowned in the waves. Built a cathedral But we never prayed) We didn’t know what we had. We were damn kids man. We weren’t prepared for all this. We didn’t know how powerful this would be. We didn’t know what it required of us. (We had a mountain But took it for granted. We had it all yeah. Who could’ve planned it). We didn’t know what to do with it, how to deal with it, so here we are. (We had a spaceship But we couldn't land it) We’re each other’s everything, but we can’t keep going on like this babe. (We found an island But we got stranded). I don’t want to leave you but being together is breaking us down. (Point of no return and now It's just too late to turn around) We thought we were untouchable. That love conquers all. Maybe, we were wrong. This is gonna hurt like a bitch (We built it up so high and now I'm fallin', it’s a long way down)

H-Olivia: I LIVE FOR YOU, I LONG FOR YOU, I LOVE YA. And i think i’ll always love ya. And I’m scared...of life without you (i get the feeling you’re walking out, time is irrelevant when i’ve not been seeing you, the consequences are falling now, there’s something i’m having nightmares about...dont let me go). But maybe just maybe thats okay, because you’re AIMH (you live in my imagination...i love you, it’s all i do). 

L-Love you Goodbye: I fucking love you and I’ll always fucking love you but i think this is the right thing to do even though it feels so wrong (i know there’s nothing i can do to change it, but is there something that can be negotiated?) We made some goddamn fireworks together though (unforgettable together held the whole world in our hands) and do ya maybe think...we can make them just once more? (if tomorrow you wont be mine, let me give it to you one last time, baby let me love you goodbye...one more taste of your lips just to bring me back to the places we’ve been and the nights we’ve had because if this is it, then at least we could end it riiiiight). ********in the interview with our FAVE Gwen Garcia, she asked if it’s better to say goodbye and end a relationship that’s not feeling right or keep trying even if your heart’s not in it. Harry responds with “I think it’s better to say goodbye...but sometimes if youre trying to protect..” Then Louis cuts him off and says “you’re going deep aren’t you”, brushing the question off as a joke but imho i think there was pain in that answer. Then Harry continues “if you’re not 100% in it, I think it’s better for both parties if you say goodbye”. And Louis adds a “yeah” at the end.********

H-Walking in the Wind: I know this is scary but i think we can do it, (you said to me do you believe i’ll be too far? if youre lost just look for me you’ll find me) I think because youre AIMH and i’m always in yours, it’ll be good for us. And look at us being mature, we’re killing it babe. We can live our separate lives and grow on our own. We dont need to make it messy and hurtful. We’re on the same page. (the fact that we can sit right here and say goodbye means we’ve already won. A necessity for apologies between you and me, baby there is none). At this point, we’re kinda part of each other right? So it’s healthy for us to be apart for a bit. (it’s not the end, i’ll see your face again... i know we’ll be alright...just close your eyes and see i’ll be by your side any time you need me). And you’ve helped me grow into the person I am, and I you, so that’s cool as hell, right? (you will find me in places that we’ve never been). We had a TON of fun (we had some good times didnt we) so i feel okay that we’re doing this (goodbyes are bittersweet) and starting the next adventure in our lives. 

H-If I could fly: I. am. yours. Louis. William. Tomlinson. (for your eyes only, i’ll show you my heart). Maybe this growth thing isn’t worth it, let me prove to you how much you mean to me (i think i might give up everything just ask me to). This is gonna be hard as shit because i’m so dependent on you (i’m missing half of me when we’re apart). I’m being honest and I’m being scared and I’m being vulnerable because I can’t lie to you and pretend I’m strong (i let my guard down, right now i’m completely defenseless). But we’re part of each other, right? (i could feel your heart inside of mine). I’ll always be here for you Lou (for when you’re lonely and forget who you are) even if for now we can’t physically be together. 

L-Home: I’ve tried, Harry. I’ve tried to play pretend (told myself i kind of like her but there was something missin in her eyes). But i was lost (i was stumblin, lookin in the dark with an empty heart) because none of it was enough, none of it was YOU (it was there i sawr it in your eyes). And then i met you and you felt the same and we’re both lost souls playing pretend who found magic in each other (but you say you feel the same, could we ever be enough?) Is our love enough to overcome everything? Maybe we can be enough. Maybe I can make this enough, let me try to make it enough for you. And if we go our separate ways, know that I’m here for you no matter what. I won’t let you be lost again. (When you’re lost I’ll find a way and I’ll be your light, you will never feel like you’re alone, I’ll make this feel like home). So go. wander. find yourself. Then when you’re ready, come home. 

 2016-2017

H- Sweet Creature: ***Harry admit that this was the first song he wrote for the album**** We aren’t in the best place rn. We’ve been fighting (had another talk about where it’s going wrong...it’s hard when we argue, we’re both stubborn). But it’s you Louis. It can’t be anyone else. (don’t know where we’re going but we know where we belong... wherever I go, you bring me home). That’s not even a question. I’m still trying to figure out who I am, but the one thing I know is that a large part of who I am is you (we started 2 hearts in one home). And aint no way I’m losing that part of myself (when i run out of road, you bring me home). It was always you. 

H-MMITH: Whenever you’re ready, I’m ready (just let me know i’ll be at the door,  hoping you’ll come around). I know I need to work on myself a little more (i gotta get better, and maybe we’ll work it out) but honestly i’m getting impatient and i want things to go back to how they were and i want to be yours again (once you go without it, nothing else would do). But I can’t communicate this to you clearly so let me just put this in a song and hope you get it (we dont talk about it, it’s something we dont do) ****Harry mentioned in an interview that he expresses himself through songwriting when he can’t say the words directly to a person because it’s easier to just write it in a song than have difficult conversations*****

H-ESNY: ****honestly no idea what this song is about but it’s something to do with them fighting and not communicating and being in a weird place before their relationship is rekindled******* edit: this could be about his stepdad

H-FTDT: I MISS YOU AND I’M TOO FULL OF PRIDE TO TELL YOU DIRECTLY JUST COME BACK INTO LIFE LOU I’M LONELY AND SAD AND EMPTY AND IM NOT FUCKING FINDING MYSELF LIKE YOU SAID I WOULD (woke up alone, played with myself where were you...we havent spoke since you went away, why wont you ever say what you wanna say) So until then I sit and wait for your sorry ass to make the first move (maybe one day you’ll call me and tell me that you’re sorry too...but you never do). Also like i have to hear from other people how you are?? (i saw your friend that you know from work, he said that you feel just fine) ANd you’re sharing OUR clothes with people?? wtf just swallow your pride and call me 

L-Miss You: OKAY BUT I CANT JUST CALL YOU BECAUSE I HAVE PRIDE TOO also my mates are trying to make me get over you (now i’m asking my friends how to say I’m sorry, they say lad give it ttime there’s no need to worry, and we can’t even be on the phone now). So i’m just numbing your absence with partying and drinks but CLEARLY ITS NOT WORKING (should be laughing but there’s something wrong...shit maybe i miss you...when i feel it coming up i just throw it all away, get another few shots cuz it doesn’t matter anyway...such a good time, i’ll believe it this time). This is weird bc like you were my everything but im trying to get used to this and it fucking sux (oh how shit changes, we were in love, now we’re strangers). And tbh, its scary af bc what if this is it (i’m asking myself, is it over?). BUT ALSO LIKE WTF U COULD REACH OUT FIRST YA KNOW (i’ve been checking my phone all evening).

H-Anna: wtf Louis how do you not see how much this is killing me. I miss you so much and seeing you on tv or in pics drives me wild bc you’re not mine. (I don’t want your sympathy but you don’t know what you do to me...everytime I see your face there’s only so much I can take...I guess it would be nice if I can touch your body). And idk if you’re replacing me (don’t know where you’re laying, just know it’s not with me) and we’re in SUCH a weird place rn how do I tell u you’re the loml (don’t know what I’d say if I passed you on the street...don’t know what I’d tell you if you asked me for the truth) so I refuse to put this song on the album and let you know this and give you satisfaction from knowing how gone I still am for you bc I have 0 idea how you feel (hope you never see this and know that it’s for you)

L-Always You: SO THIS IS ME SWALLOWING MY PRIDE STANDING IN FRONT OF YOU SAYING IM SORRY FOR THAT NIGHT... ok but fr i miss u i miss u i miss u i miss u and nothing else compares like i can travel the whole world and all i think about is how much more fun it was with you and the memories we shared and i wish i could just say thx fr th mmrs and move on but actually no thx actually fuck you for making me not able to enjoy my life without you. So like...come home? and wrap your legs around me? also lmao i took El to a gay bar in amsterdam for her bday lmao i miss u come cuddle me and i’ll tell you all about it

L-We Made It: looks like we made it, look how far we’ve come my baby. They saidd I bett they’ll never make it, but just look at us holding onn, we’re still togetherr, still going stronggg. Also to the fans, miss our single bed and the nights we talked about our dreams :-* also Andrew my man luv u

2018-2019

L-KMM: our love was youthful and exhilarating and fucking electric and i think it still can be. dont know what i’d do without you now H 

L-DLIBYH: We’re strong babe and we’ve grown and we aren’t gonna let life drag us down. I’m doing better, you’re doing better, this is what we wanted. And now any shit we go through, we’ll go through TOGETHER 

L-Too Young: Okay but looking back, that was a lot of shit we went through and we were just babies and i’m sorry for not fighting harder (i cant believe i gave in to the pressure when they said a love like this would never last so i cut you off cuz i didnt know no better) baby i tried, i tried to protect you but like it was just so much and i hate that you got hurt and i wont ever let that happen again. ALso go us for being mature and COMMUNICATING (face to face at the kitchen table, we can finally have a conversation that I wish we could’ve had before). ANd i know you’re an arrogant son of a bitch who can’t admit when he’s sorry so here let ME say i’m sorry that i hurt you darling. Like we were too young to know we had everything BUT now we’re old(er) and can realize that when we’re together, we DO have everything now and omg is this our happily ever after and we can have a daughter and name her Darcy 

L-Habit: do i need to spell it out for you iiiiii aaaaaaaaammmmmmm sssssssoooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyy. But tbh i let you go because it felt right because mentally you were already out the door and i needed to give you room to grow babe. And i needed the space too (you gave me the time and the space i was out of control and i’m sorry i let you down). but like also i’ve learned i can’t escape you Styles. You’re always in my fucking heart and my fucking mind and in every essence of my being and somehow I knew that 9 years ago and it took me this long to realize how powerful this really is (guess that that i know what i already knew, i was better with you and i miss you now). Ooooh also my favorite line i wrote (took some time cuz i ran out of energy of playing someone I heard I’m supposed to be and honestly i dont have to choose anymore) like who am i kidding, im done pretending i just wanna be yoursss now

L-Defenseless: I can’t help it okay theres something about you that doesn’t let me stay away. I need you and I know that rekindling this relationship isn’t going to be easy even though it feels so so right. It’s going to be hard work (sleeping on our problems but we’ll solved them in our dreams, wake up early morning and it’s still under the sheets) and we need to communicate and solve our problems but here I am, raw and unfiltered and emotionally naked in front of you ready to lay it all on the table (not sure how to say this right, got so much to lose. NEver been so defenseless). So like this branch I’m reach out to you and you be honest with me too babe (you dont have to keep on being strong for me and you. Acting like you feel no pain, you know i know you do...I can’t get inside, when you’re lost in your pride but you don’t have a thing to prove). Be open with me. Lets talk. Let’s solve problems. Lets have an adult relationship. I’m asking for a little vulnerabiltiy babe. It’s just me. Theres nothing to be scared of

L-Walls: And here you have me in my purest form. No lies, no secrets, no insecurities to hide behind. Losing you was fucking painful but i got through it. I’ve been through hell and back and I’ve fought. And without you, I grew into the person I am. And any further growing i’m doing is gonna be with you. bc it was all for you babe. and honestly i can take anything life throws at me now. I’m strong baby. I’m fucking strong and fucking brave and fucking resilient and...fucking yours. ***** wtf is the I just hope i see you one day and you’ll say to me oh oh********

H-Golden: You are the literal sun and I’m not ready. YOU’RE SUCH A GOOD PERSON (you were way too bright for me, i’m hopeless, broken, so you wait for me in the sky). I’m scared to go through this alone, I need your comfort and your guidance (i can feel you take control of who i am and all i’ve ever known). But you’re scared to go through this with me bc you dont wanna get hurt and i’m too open so where tf does that leave us. ******this could be about coming out especially with the London AND NY secret shows where Harry added the lyric I’m hoping someday you’ll open*******

H-Adore You: You dont have to say you love me, you dont have to say nothing, you dont have to say you’re mine. I’d walk through fire for you. Just let me adore Lou. Like its the only thing I’ll ever do. read: Louis is a great person to just admire what he’s like. ALso I dont need anything back. I just dont want to hide my love for you anymore. I don’t need answers or promises. Just let me adore you. ********the music video is also basically a Louis appreciation post. He was the boy with the smile that the world took away from him. He found Harry lost and loved him and nurtured him and made him confident and allowed him to be who he wanted to be. But in doing so, Harry became big and unsatisfied and wanted to explore the world and was clearly interested in Hollywood and Rockstardom especially evident in his behavior 2014-2015. And Louis wasn’t about that life and didn’t want to hold him back. So he let him free. But they realized that they don’t work apart. Wherever they’re going, they’re going together, as the boy sails into the unknown following the fish. I see it as Harry’s version of “this one is a thank you for what you did for me” ************* I see it, I appreciate it, and I love you for it

H-Lights Up: ****fight with Louis. (What do you mean I’m sorry by the way) About coming out? About fame? (Step into the light, so bright sometimes) Either way, L is the guy driving the motorcycle in the video who makes H feel comfortable and safe until they get pulled over because SOMEONE wont let them love*******

H-Falling: What if i’m out, what if i’m someone you won’t talk about? Okay maybe I lied I do want you to claim me. Would me coming out of the closet make that hard for you? I CAN’T GO THROUGH AN IDENTITY CRISIS WITHOUT YOU LOU. I picked someone supportive and now I’m spoiled and I dont know how to be with myself. You want back in my life but what if I dont deserve it? (you said you cared and you missed me too...what i’m someone i dont want around). What if you’re better off without me? (i get the feeling that you’ll never need me again). I know youve been through so much shit because of me, things you’ve never even told me about and im afraid...that I wasn’t worth it. Am I being selfish? because either way, i want YOU (what if you’re someone i just want around). Does that make me a bad person? 

H-TBSL: ****Probably when they starting talking again but it was v casual and they didn’t really discuss their relationship yet*****. I MISS U BUT I WONT TELL U THAT and its nice to talk to u again i missed your voice but if u call me baby i will kill u bc that word has weight OKAY. Like i know you just call everyone babe and darling and sweetheart but baby is FOR ME and only for me when you wake up with me and cuddle me and if you think you have any right calling me baby without giving the luxury of being in a relationship with you then piss off because that shit hurts dude. (i know that you’re trying to be friends, know that you mean it...it’s hard for me to go home to be so lonely). ALso it’s not my fault i’m like this, you literally captured my heart when i was 16 like wtf do u expect (dont blame me for falling, i was just a little boy)

H-Sunflower Vol. 6: we were babies and i was so enamored by you and you’re so bright and beautiful and i want to watch you all day and make you smile and i want you to touch my hair and call me curly and i hope im not making you uncomfortable with my heart eyes but like how are you so perfect. I hope you think i’m cool, i’m really trying but like you’re SO FUNNY and charming and everyone loves you i hope im not embarassing myself. And now it’s like 8 years later and i think i can have you again and i want you so bad but i dont wanna seem too eager and im trying to have dignity and not text you first but like also i want nothing more than to talk to you. Do you think i’m cool now? did you like my new hairstyle? Do you think i’m funny on tour? I want everything i want to be domestic again and kiss in the kitchen and i want to cook for you and as;ldfa;sdhaf i want to buy you flowers everyday and shower ur cute face with kiss. boopx28 

H-Canyon Moon: Hell yea i got ma man back and i have a girlfriend named Jennifer ;) and we are domestic and even though I HATE being away from him for work (so hard to leave it) we have the 2 week rule yall then i can wrap my legs around him and after so so so long I’ll be h.o.m.e. Also did i tell you his eyes are so so blue like sky who i dont know her

H-TPWK: So we’re really doing this. We don’t need to have it all figured out. We can just be us. and happy. and dance. The world loves us babe. (Giving second chances, I don’t need all the answers and if we’re here long enough we’ll see it’s all for us and we’ll belong)

H-Fine Line: You’ve got my devotion but man I can hate you sometimes....We’ll be a fine line. Between what? love and hate? public and private? out and in the closet? each others’ and ourselves? Idk. But i’m going to swallow my pride (my hands at risk I fold) because no matter what, the worst possible outcome is not having you. And I never wanna go through that again. I know we have work to do on our relationship (spreading you open is the only way I know you). And there’s lot of unknown here (there’s things that we’ll never know) but what i do know is that i cant resist you (you sunshine you temptress) and i cant be without you ever again. I think it’ll be hard as hell. But when have we known love as anything but hard? And when have we known our love as anything but worth it? We’ll be a fine line baby. But i know, i knowww with every part of me that we’ll be alright. Because these past 10 years, we’ve been through A LOT. ANd it could have ruined us and made us cynical and cold and closed off. And I think at one point it did. But you know what we did? We fought it. We fought it together. Then we fought it individually. And we became BRAVE. And a brilliant man once said, “love is only for the brave”. 

[looongcat]

Ozmafia Thoughts

I posted a whole thing on my main but now that I’m using this blog for all things otome, I figured I would try to organize my thoughts because i have so many thoughts.

This is not spoiler free! But I try to label some of the major spoilers.

Caramia

Caramia is the don of the oz family, and it’s his duty to protect his territory, the people who live in his territory, and to sign papers for stuff? Man’s is always signing papers for mafia reasons :) I knew from the start that he would be my favourite. I just love a guy who’s nice. Call me basic, but I just love a man who wants me to be happy and takes cares of me? I love feeling like someone cares about me! He’s also a great cook, and who doesn’t love delicious food? Idk how to explain how I feel about caramia, I liked his personality but I didn’t love his story? I really felt like there was some distance between Caramia and Fuka, like he was in a whole nother world from her. Which you do get to chose whether she’s happy he’s in charge or like she feels lonely. I did however really liked his transfer routes. I did the axel to caramia transfer first, and I felt like it wasnt clear that they slept together, but after I did caramia to axel and I got hit with that axel CG! Anyways, I liked the transfer routes.

Kyrie

I knew I would hate this guy so much. I’m just not interested in a guy who’s a fucking tease. Like he openly admits that he likes it when you’re upset. Like I do not want that TYVM. I found him kinda tolerable in his transfer routes however, probably because he does have to try and make Fuka happy in order to get Fuka to break up with her boyfriend. He really said break up with your bf i’m bored! Also I felt it was kinda weird that he was paying for Fuka’s br*th*l visits. I think its kinda weird that he introduced her to it, and was like encouraging it. ESPECIALLY*** (major super duper spoiler here what will be censored lol) if he thought she was *****

I saw some people argue that he might not actually love fuka, but I think that one transfer route ending, kinda shows that he really does love her IYKYK. but i’m so sus about that ending where he becomes a dumbass, i really think this bitch is faking it! I do not believe him for a second!

Axel

I quite like Axel. I personally don’t mind when a guy is at this level of over protectiveness. Plus as I have mentioned, i just love it when a cold guy is soft for you. I absolutely adore that shit (like when he ask Fuka to treat him as an equal and drop the honorifics? that shit gets me T_T)  He also gets extremely jealous very easily, which becomes an area of conflict for him and Fuka and it is up to you whether you wanna forgive him or move onto another guy. Personally, I would forgive him. I would talk to him about it! But I could understand being in your first relationship and not being able to handle your emotions. I think Axel is quite sweet, and he just wants the best for fuka, which is cute.

Scarlet 

IDK how I feel about Scarlet, specifically the part where he straight up states he’s a minor! Like what’s up with that? Why couldn’t he be older? However, I did really enjoy his route. It’s super cute and slow burn-y and nothing romantic actually happens probably because he is a minor. Scarlet is kind, resourceful, caring lol. We always love a guy who’s trying his best to keep the peace among everyone, while still providing for his family.

His route also has a bit of plot. It shows what hamelin was like prior to a specific event that you learn about in robin hood. I dont have a specific order that I think this game should be played but it might be interesting to maybe play scarlet’s route after robin hood.

Caesar

As I’ve said before, I don’t mind a man who’s trynna kill me. Idk what’s up with that LOL. Well maybe I like how you can see them change from wanting to kill you to not...wanting to kill you. One thing I remember liking about Caesar was that he usually called you a woman, as opposed to a girl. Which made me feel a lot better, will elaborate more on that later. I think even though he stayed harsh to her the whole time, I liked how you could see he was slowly falling/becoming whipped for fuka. Like the comedy of him wearing that dumb cloak so y’all could watch the stars together. Or like him working at Soh’s restaurant because he had to earn the money, and not just take Soh’s money. Like I loved that! Plus the ending where he isn’t accepted but he keeps pulling dumb stunts just to see you is v cute lol.

Soh

Idk how to talk about Soh without major spoilers. Soh is so sweet. I like how he’s always striking up conversations with Fuka in all the routes, which is probably good for her, considering almost everyone else is pretty wary of her existence. I honestly liked his route and I guess that's all I can say.

*big spoilers* I know most people don’t like Soh, cause he’s the reason for all things bad LOL. Yes he’s using/deceiving Fuka the whole time, but its not like he drugged Fuka or kept Fuka captive lol. Like most of the time he’s trying to keep her safe, and trynna make her happy, even if its probably so he could gain her trust or something. I also feel like his route was kinda him giving up his grand plan, and wanting to run away and be happy with Fuka, which obviously doesnt happen. Idk i liked that he ultimately treated her right.

Pashet

What’s up with otome games giving you a girl option but not the option to actually romance the girl? Her route was fine, and the friendship that builds between Fuka and her is fine. Sorry that’s a little salty lol. I actually thought this route was really cute. I have my reservations about Fuka being in romantic relationships, so it actually was kinda nice to see her make an actual friend without catching feels. Female friendships are absolutely underrated and I’m glad Fuka was actually able to make a friend who is looking out for her best interest.

Hamelin

I usually try not to use kiss cgs but this is the only couple cg and I like using couple cgs. So sorry if this is spoiler-y to you. But how do I feel about Hamelin... you know what I very much liked him. His route is so short and it’s kinda a secret ending. In that sense his route is a little unsatisfying. It’s kinda unclear how Fuka could love him in that short amount of time... but she does. Hamelin is hard to describe because he’s so different in all the other routes. He’s kinda the main villain in most of the routes, aside from his own. You get to see a little bit more of his personality in Scarlet’s route. I genuinely think he is a good guy, and was trying his best! That’s all you can really ask of anyone right?

*slight spoiler* I’m so sad he didn’t get a redemption? You find out why he did the things that he did, and he just... doesn’t get anything? He like doesn't even appear? Just gone into the abyss. I wish Fuka and him could have gotten a happier ending, since their ending isn’t really... happy

Dr Crow

I do not like Robin Hood. Isn’t Robin Hood about stealing from the rich? Like... why is this man treating everyone the same? Why is this man even apart of the upper class? Okay to keep this brief and spoiler free lol. Dr. Crow here is the town’s doctor. He treats everyone the same regardless of what family they are from. In his eyes you are his patient and his goal is to heal you. He’s quite elegant and seems really dependable and then he hits you with some REDACTED

*spoiler & TW for drugging* Fuck this guy. I think what’s worse is that he did not have to drug fuka, she would have gone along with whatever he wanted probably. I’m guessing he did it so she would be in deep sleep. But still, ew gross. How you gonna love your wife and do that. This man is out for revenge and I dont like it.

Manboy/Dorian/Alfani

I barely like Manboy. Honestly I never heard of Dorian Gray before playing this so I was v confused (and if you heard of it then you probably will be more prepared than I was). I actually played this route really early on because i thought it might be funny. It is in fact not at all funny and I was not okay after finishing it. I am a little glad I got it out of the way though, if I left this for like last I would have been v upset and it probably would have ruined the game for me lol. I do kinda wanna replay the route now that I know about Dorian but idk.. i still hate this route so idk if I really will.

If you don’t know anything like me, this is the br*thel route. Manboy works there more as like a receptionist? Dorian Gray is the ringleader, and there’s Alfani who’s the male escort. Feel free to wikipedia Dorian Gray before trying this route. Not to spoil the story but TW you also get drugged in this route too.

Overall Thoughts

I feel lukewarm about ozmafia. In one aspect I like how each route was different and how the different endings actually like split off. I also enjoyed how there wasn’t necessarily a good ending and a bad ending, they were just different endings. Obviously in some routes, one ending is better than the other, and also in others neither endings are great lol. I also quite enjoyed the transfer routes, it felt different, innovative, like ozmafia really tried something there! And the replay ability, the game adds extra scenes that provide more insight towards what the love interest is thinking, which makes replaying to get the other endings very enjoyable. There also an extra scene before each ending, so you could also replay the same ending too. I really went into ozmafia with like zero expectations, and i was both surprised and underwhelmed? I dont think thats the right word.

*MAJOR SPOILERS* There’s this really great video essay called born sexy yesterday, that really explains why I felt slightly uneasy about the whole story. If you think about it Fuka has amnesia, she’s mentally a child but here she in engaging in adult activities with grown ass men ._. and I know I said I liked the transfer routes, but that was before I found out that Fuka is literally a 10 year old in an “adult” body. LIKE WHEN I SAW DOROTHY I WAS LIKE WHO TF LET THIS INFANT READ DORIAN GRAY? Anyways the fact that dorothy is literally like 10 years old, did not sit well with me. Yknow this story is about wizard of oz, so I did have a feeling Fuka was dorthy, BUT WHEN ISAW HER SPRITE, girl i had to look up dorthy’s age and apparently shes somewhere between 8 and 12. So, throughout the game it was a bit uncomfortable because I did feel like Fuka was mentally a child but I kinda justified it as well she lost her memories, so she’s a blank slate like a child, maybe she’ll mature up with memories but uhhh, that’s just not going to happen.

So there are my thoughts. I thought Ozmafia was really different from other otome games because of how each character got their own story, and the transfer routes felt so innovative, as well as adding the extra scenes in the second playthrough! But there’s some bad born sexy yesterday vibes that make me not okay with it. I would recommend the game though. There’s so much content, it took me like a week to finish it all. Plus the art is quite nice.

[withallthingslove]

avengers endgame spoiler-filled review

below the cut bc spoilers obviously

even after two viewings this movie is super overwhelming so I’m just gonna jump right in

- clint’s family disappearing was so haunting and traumatic omg

- i didn’t like the music choice over the marvel opening crawl

- nebula was so adorably intense when tony playing footbal with her

- carol is such a bad bitch she just carried an entire fucking ship through space

- steve running up to tony and holding on to him... that was content I didn’t know I needed

- the pepperony hug ughhh I’m not a huge gwenyth paltrow fan but she was so good as pepper in this

- honestly I get tony has been through a lot but he was such a dick back at the avengers compound. I’ve always preferred steve to tony and that scene really displayed why. Yes tony was right something bigger was coming, but his way of going about preventing it was proven wrong both times. I don’t consider ultron to be super canon because joss whedon sucks but tony’s first idea to try and solve it failed, and then the accords also failed and even rhodey regretted it. Infinity war was basically “hey yeah the accords was dumb af and steve was right and now the avengers are scattered.” Both tony and steve were selfish and made mistakes in civil war but the fact that it had been over three years and tony was still soooo angry with steve and holding a grudge just rubbed me the wrong way.

- I really felt for thor when they went to get thanos. Chris hemsworth’s acting in that scene was so good when he realized they had failed

- again who on earth put steve in charge of a support group. And while yes its nice to have some lgbtq representation marvel is way behind on that so to me it did not feel like enough

- paul rudd did so well in this movie and scott is such a good dad ugh

- 10/10 would die for morgan stark. She is soooo cute and it was hilarious when she was like “mom told me to come rescue you”

- i know a lot of people are mad at tony dying bc he could have “retired” but that scene with his daughter before steve, nat, and scott show up shows he could not. He still had a garage where he built iron man suits and suits for pepper. That’s not what someone does when they are out of a fight. That’s why he fell back into it so fast because he never left it. He was still tinkering and preparing and even when he retired he was still fully ready to go back

- i like professor hulk but at the same time i miss bruce

- tony and steve love each other so much it made me so happy when tony showed up at the compound. they’ve had their differences but there is real love there

- speaking of real love I will still never forgive joss whedon for taking clintasha away from us like yes their platonic friendship is great but UGH. They love each other SOOOOOOO much 

- tom hiddleston as loki always steals the show and i miss him so much. I was convinced he wasnt dead so I’m sad that he was still dead in the current timeline. But maybe since there is now an alternate dimension with loki and the tesseract he will show up again

- him impersonating steve, his side eye, just... *chefs kiss*

- the america’s ass comment... amazing, iconic, beautiful. And then steve’s “yeah I know” comment to his 2012 self. I’m so glad the russos let steve be funny

- I love how much winter soldier played into this one especially since it was the russo’s first mcu movie. The elevator scene... steve outsmarting the hydra agents. Secretary pierce showing up... and then steve fighting his past self was just *chefs kiss* again. The fact that he knows his own weakness is bucky and uses it against himself 

- not excited to see tilda swinton’s character because its just a reminder of marvel’s whitewashing but I appreciated it trying to explain the timeline/dimension stuff

- i also loved that at the army compound tony was able to get closure with his dad, something he deserved for a long time. I think that was another hint he was going to die because his arc was completing while steve’s.... the look on steve’s face when he saw peggy just broke me. absolutely broke me. Steggy was my first ship in the mcu and so steve and peggy hold a special place in my heart. The fact she still keeps the picture of tiny steve after all these years (a reference to agent carter)... they both moved on enough to enjoy life but never truly moved on enough to leave the other behind. And so while tony was getting closure, steve was being reminded of what he wanted most and couldn’t have. I also loved the tie in with agent carter and showing Jarvis this movie was truly a fan service to us all

- okay so rhodey/nebula: so ive never been a huge nebula person but i really liked her in this movie. I loved rhodey’s line about “you work with what you got” as far as their disabilities. I felt so bad for new nebula because old nebula SUCKKSSS and I hate she had to face her. I loved that in this movie thanos was wearing his armor because 2014 thanos was not as strong or secure with himself. His energy was SO different compared to the thanos we saw in infinity war so props to josh brolin

- natasha/clint: Well go ahead and rip my heart out. The audience knows only one of them is coming back but they have no idea. And they love each other SO FUCKING MUCH they both tried to sacrifice themselves to save the other person. That is true love. Jeremy renner is such an underrated actor and his reaction to natasha dying just killed me. But so did scarlett johansson’s acting as much as I hate to admit it because I’ve really stopped liking her as much due to her recent acting choices but she played that scene so well. And I will miss natasha romanoff forever. She deserved so much more and paved the way for all the other female superheroes in the mcu

- everyone crying over nat and especially steve broke me. They had such a special friendship, almost as strong as her and clint and I feel so many people forget that because of how natural they were together. And her last words to him were that she would see him in a minute and then she didn’t come back..

- i just realized i havent talked about thor and thats honestly because my brain blocked it out. I like that they explored his depression but dont like that he was made the joke of the avengers and I don’t think it was handled well. I did enjoy his conversation with frigga and by that I mean it made me cry. (also loki deserves a conversation like that too don’t @ me)

- STEVE WIELDS MJOLNIR!!! IT WAS SO BADASS AND MY DREAM COME TRUE I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE EXCITED IN A MOVIE. To me that was the absolute highlight of the movie

- And then sam says “on your left” and all the characters come and the music... poetic cinema

- thanos is a weak little bitch and as soon as wanda was beating him he was fine with his own troops dying just so he could get away

- TONY AND PETER REUNITING CURED MY DEPRESSION AND THEN GAVE IT RIGHT BACK

- CAROL IS SO POWERFUL MY LESBIAN QUEEN

- sebastian stan has no business looking this good my god

- I forgot how much I missed peter parker

- I didn’t notice mbaku until my second viewing and honestly the wakandan characters were shafted like poor shuri we didn’t even know she was dusted until a few weeks before the movie

- I know everyone loves the scene of all the women characters carrying the gauntlet but honestly marvel has a long way to go before they reach equality and it honestly wasn’t enough for me

- side note pepper fighting back to back with tony was awesome

- ugh tony’s face when he realizes what he has to do and he looks at strange for confirmation... give rdj an oscar like my god. He knows that the past few years have led up to this moment and he is absolutely terrified and determined and I am tearing up while writing this because I am remembering it so vividly

- peter parkers goodbye had me crying why is tom holland such a good actor

- pepper’s goodbye BROKE ME... “you can rest now” I think that is the epitome of tony’s arc. For his entire storyline he has been trying to right his wrongs and save his friends and the world and that is so much for one man to carry on his shoulders and everyone knew it would be the death of him. I know tony stans are pissed off that he died, but I don’t see him just being able to retire. Obviously I didn’t want him to die, but his whole storyline has been leading up to this. He truly got a hero’s sendoff and was solidified as THE hero of the mcu. This era started with him and it ended with him. It was a beautiful sendoff for the character that started it all. And I don’t think rdj would go along with it if he didn’t approve

- Steve’s ending.... so I knew from spoilers what would happen and while it was something I wanted in theory I was pissed when I first found out. But it somehow worked. If you look at steve’s arc, he has always been a man out of time. For everyone getting mad he was hung up on a girl he kissed once, it’s pretty much confirmed in agent carter that he and peggy were on the DL for 3 years. she wasnt just a crush he knew for a few months. They loved each other and fought side by side for three years and time took him too soon. In age of ultron the only part I liked was steve’s vision where he gets a dance with peggy. As much as he moved on in the present, the possibility he missed with her always haunted him. You can tell in peggy’s video in the winter solider that even though she married and had kids, the thought of steve still gets her choked up. When she sees him as an old woman she immediately crumbles. They both have referred to each other as the loves of their lives. 

- So with that said, I don’t think it’s weird or out of the blue that he would suddenly decide to try and go back to peggy. They won, bucky is back and safe, sam is back and safe, he can finally rest, and he has the tools to go back in time. The way I interpreted it, Bucky 100% knew what he was going to do. The look on his face, the tone of his voice. He knew Steve was not coming back, and he also knew he deserved to have that happy ending. So while sam and bruce thought it would only be 5 seconds, bucky turned away from the machine, knowing steve wouldn’t show up there. I ship stucky too because I just want steve happy so while at first I was like “how could he leave bucky??” watching it on screen it made sense. Bucky approved of his choice, and while he was saddened by it, he understood it. 

- In my interpretation, I don’t think steve stayed in the main timeline. I think him going back created an alternate timeline where he married peggy, dissolved hydra earlier, and freed bucky earlier. At some point, those two timelines merged, and he wandered over to where he knew they would be. OR after peggy died, he used the technology to travel back to that timeline when he was old. Or my friend suggested he could have met tony stark in his alternate timeline and asked for his help. Who knows. He literally came back with a shield, meaning he was at one point captain america again in that timeline. I don’t think there is anyway he could just stay quiet for 70 years about bucky being tortured and peggy running shield that was secretly hydra. I refuse to believe that. If the russos come out and say that’s what he did, then I’ll backtrack and say I don’t approve of steve’s ending. But as of right now I’m okay with it. 

[fragmentedink-archived]

All for Ash and Nik for the 7 sins

THANK!!!

🦚 Pride: Arrogance and hubris. Egocentricity. These are all the things that represent pride.

What is an action an OC of yours once took based on pride that caused more trouble than it’s worth?

Ash: OK SEE, IN ONE OF MY STORIES, ASH MAKES A COMPLETE ASS OUT OF HIMSELF BEC OF PRIDE. He finds out Things and Nate straight up decks him- and Bay lets him

Nik: hmm,,, Niks probably gotten his ass handed to him bec he wouldn’t stay down in a fight until they forced him down

Whom is the most prideful out of all your OCs?

Between Nik and Ash,,, I gotta say that Ash is more prideful, but not by much

How do your OCs react to prideful people? Do they tolerate them? Can’t stand them? Believe all their self compliments and hail them as a hero?

Lmao prideful people piss both ash and nik off. Probably hits too close to home ahahaha

Does the idea or theme of pride shape your WIP in any shape or form, or is its pretense minor or non existent?

Pride absolutely takes shape in my wip. I don’t think its a Big Part, but pride is a p big character flaw in both Nik and Ash, and will probably affect their decision making skills

🍕Gluttony: Overindulgence and selfishness mark the face of a true glutton

What food would your OCs absolutely kill for? What’s their favorite, and who would they fight for stealing their food?

Nik: Can i say cock or pussyMe: NO YOU MAY NOT

Ash really really likes mango smoothies and fruit. Nik i think would really like sour gummy worms. mmmm im not sure that eitehr would fight anyone for taking their food. Ash might snap his teeth at Nate for trying to take an apple tbh

Has your OCs ever been in a situation where anyone has purposely withheld food from them? How did they deal with this?

I don’t think anyone’s withheld food from Ash, but I think Nik’s parents have withheld dinner from Nik when Nik failed in training

Which OCs don’t like food and only eat because it’s a necessary function?

neither

What’s the worst thing any OC has done for food?

I don’t think either has done anything really terrible for food

Is the theme or idea of gluttony a part of your WIP in any way?

oh,,, i think there could absolutely be a theme or idea of gluttony in the wip, but in not sure that it has to do with either of them

💎Greed: There’s never enough, why stop here when you can get more? Greed, the insatiable hunger for power and materials.

What makes your OCs keep wanting for more, what do they keep taking and taking even though the have a lot of if?

You know, Ash isnt really all that greedy of a person, he doesn’t want much at all. But Nik, he wants more Life. He just,,, wants. Everything

How far would your OCs go to gain power? Which one is the most likely to climb the social ladder with ease?

I don’t think either would go far to gain power. Neither really want it, per se. They both could climb social latters easily, i think, depends on the social latter. Ash would do well with higher society while Nik would be able to climb the social latter of the underworld easily

Who is ashamed of their greed? Who thinks they don’t deserve anything and shun away their wants and needs convincing themselves that they’re just being selfish and greedy?

neither of them

How does the idea of greed shape your WIP? Does Greed come up as an major or minor theme?

im,,, not all too sure that there really is an idea of greed in the story

💄Lust: The extreme longing for something whether it sex, power, or revenge, marks the pricinples of lust.

What do your OCs lust for the most? What is that one thing they just want and can’t stop thinking about?

I think that Ash def has a lust for revenge, for the ones that killed his family, and its really interesting to see a vengeful Ash bec hes usally so easy going

Nik is lusting after,,, well,, anything that makes him feel good tbh. He doesnt lust after power or revenge, just after feeling something

Who gets distracted from the situation at hand due to their lust for something or someone?

I think Nik’s feelings about wanting to feel something and lusting after life in general, is one of the reasons for Nik’s whole arc in the story. I,,, think that Ash has a hard time seeing things clearly at all when he’s in the headspace to get Revenge

How far would your OCs go to get what they most long far? Who ignores their desires?

Nik would go through a lot of people to get what he wanted. Ash, i mean, to get what he wants, he pretneds to be human, he befriends Bay, he gives his family’s army and gold to continue on the war bec he thinks that it was demons that killed his family

Does Lust shape the theme of your WIP? How does it let you explore your characters and plot if so?

oh, there is Absoluty a shaping of the wip with lust, on both of their parts. Between Ash working to avenge his family, and then Nik being 95% lust ridden, i meAN

😴Sloth: Sloth is marked by laziness and lack of motivation, and is probably the reason so many things go wrong.

Which OC is the laziest? Who procrastinates the most, and who just really needs to stop taking so many naps??

oooof between the two of them, Nik’s probably the most lazy. He is the King of procrastination, but also would love naps

Who’s the one that is labeled unfairly as lazy when really they work harder than anyone else? Maybe they have health issues or other more important things, maybe they help in the little way? Doesn’t matter because people keep judging them.

hm,, i think this could also apply to Nik. He has anxiety so doing things the way he does could probably be construed as laziness. Could also explain his procrastination

Who decided to half ass something and royally fucked everything up for everyone else?

How does sloth play into your WIP? Is it more character focused or does it play a bigger part in the plot?

💣Wrath: Explosive anger and refusal for forgiveness makes wrath a rather powerful problem

Which of your OCs is the most vengeful? The most angry and unforgiving? Who will hunt you down to the ends of the earth just because you ate the last pudding cup.

oh, they’re both vengeful. They both are angry people, its just more noticeable in Nik bec Ash turns it on himself. Neither of them are really the forgiving type, but with Ash, there are a few people that he has a blind spot too (alhglsdgh no pun intended) like Bay

Which Of your OCs is on a quest for revenge? Is that their main goal or are there other more important things

Ash!! WELL,,, not like,,, actively. He’s participating via Maikel’s plans. But its not his Main Goal

How well do your OCs handle forgiveness? Who is able to let go of their anger, smile politely and walk away?

Ash?? NIk??? letting go of anger?? Forviving peopel??? They don’t know her. Unrealistic

How does the Sin of Wrath play into your WIP? Is it important to your theme?

Oh, i think its a p big theme, but it revolves more around Bay than it does either Ash or Nik

🐍Envy: Jealousy is what makes the world go round, everyone wants what the other has after all.

Any conflicts between characters that drives a wedge into their relationship whether it be platonic or romantic due to jealousy?

I think that Nate and Ash’s relationship gets a bit strained when Nate gets ivolved with Bay, but im not sure what kind of jealousy that is??? The Arwaine Brothers relationship with each other is often strained bec of their parents pitting them against each other

Which OCs envy make them feel guilty and wrecks them? Makes them feel like they’re a selfish person for being jealous?

Ash, I think

Which OCs try to to communicate their Jealousy and solve it in an healthy manner and who just lets it fester and grow?

oooof. I think that Ash would handle it best. Nik doesn’t know how to do anything healthily LOL

Any major plot points sparked by jealousy?

i dont,,, think so?

How does jelousy fit into your wip and affect the themes and plot?

im not sure tbh

[uchihashisuii]

SOMETIMES SELFCARE IS WRITING YOUR OC TALKING TO A FATHER FIGURE ABOUT RELIGION IN A WAY YOU WISH YOU COULD

another character study for my V. with lots of religious talk and a crisis of faith. again.

-----

V steps into the church, almost warily. Her heart is heavy and her steps feel as though they drag; it has been far too long since she last confessed. V stops at the threshold to dip her fingers in the basin of holy water, crossing herself before gripping the rosary in her pocket in a tight fist.

Padre is sitting in one of the pews at the front, his back to her as he stares up at the pulpit. She spots the Valentinos stationed nearby, hands on gilded guns. Some watch her with glares hot enough to burn, but most know her by sight alone. She keeps her head high as she walks down the aisle, trying not to visibly shake. The man standing at the end of Padre's pew nods as she approaches, stepping away to offer her privacy.

"Something tells me your heart is as heavy as your footsteps, niña," Padre says before he sees her, sounding amused. V blinks, before letting out a breathless chuckle. She sits next to him, running a hand back through her hair.

"Almost forgot how well you know me, abuelo."

Padre hums at her words, leaning back in the pew and looking at her patiently. Never any bullshit with him, she thinks with a smile. Always straight to the point.

"Can I - I need to talk to someone," she admits in a quiet voice.

"You know I am always available, Marina. Especially for you."

They sit in silence for a time, V trying to gather her thoughts with a heavy heart.

"I -" She swallows thickly, the burn of tears stinging her eyes, "I've always told myself that what I do is necessary. The streets are dangerous, it's kill or be killed. I found comfort in the fact that what I do is to protect my home, my family, and myself. But, lately, I -" Her throat tightens as she wipes away errant tears, taking a deep breath. Padre waits patiently, looking at her with that serious look of his.

"The lives I take; the repercussions of everything I do. I kill one man, and someone out there just lost a son, a father, a brother, a husband, a friend. I tell myself this man must die so that others may live. But the ripples of my actions are endless. What allowed me to play God and decide who will live and who will die? Will God Himself allow me to His side when my time comes, after all the blood I've spilled on these streets?" Her chest is heaving, now; she can barely see through the tears that fall. But she cant make herself stop, she's been holding this weight in her chest for too long, agonizing over the sins she has committed. The dam has broken and she cant stop -

"I dont like hurting people, I dont enjoy killing like some people do. There is no thrill, it is necessity. Does that give me some - some moral high ground? Why do I deserve benediction and forgiveness but other killers dont? You've always taught me to do what I must to protect home and family but I am enacting the exact same sins as those whose lives I take. Why should God love me, when I kill His children? Why should God forgive me, when I just keep on fucking hurting people?"

Her sob echoes around them. V curls in on herself, face in her palms as she cries. Padre places a hand on her back, running slowly up and down her spine.

"I may tell myself I'm different from the psychopaths and degenerates out there, who commit atrocities every day. But a sin is a sin, in the eyes of God. I murder and steal and lie, all to keep myself alive. What makes me different? It doesnt. God wont forgive me, not with these hands drenched in blood."

Padre is quiet for a time, still rubbing her back and allowing her the time to cry. It's only when her sobs turn into sniffles that he pulls his hand back and pushes a lock of hair behind her ear, seeing in front of him the little girl always dressed in blue.

"If there was a sinner beside you right now," Padre says softly, "bearing their doubts and their soul at your feet; and they asked you with tears in their eyes if God could still love them; what would you say? If they asked you if the Lord would forgive their sins, what would you say?"

"That God loves all," she responds automatically, wiping her face on her sleeve. "and that forgiveness comes to all who ask for it."

"So why, then," Padre is smiling now, "would you tell yourself anything different, child of God?"

Her breath leaves her in a gust, feeling as though someone had punched her in the stomach. She looks at Padre with wide eyes, her heart lodged somewhere in her throat. The old man simply chuckles warmly, patting her hand.

"You do not need me to offer you salvation, niña. You do not need to agonize over the scriptures or prostrate yourself before God. He knows your heart, your soul; He has weighed your sins and forgiven them. That is what He does."

"How can you know for sure?" V asks in a whisper.

"Because Christ died for our sins, out of love for all mankind. Forgiveness for sin is given to those who ask and repent. You do these things to keep yourself alive, to protect what you love. You repent by showing up here, showing the depth of your faith and your heart. Of course God will forgive you, child. He already has."

[cleohn]

﹤𝚂𝙾𝙽 𝙽𝙰𝙴𝚄𝙽, 𝚂𝙷𝙴 / 𝙷𝙴𝚁, 𝙲𝙸𝚂 𝙵𝙴𝙼𝙰𝙻𝙴﹥; * - hello CLEO AHN. long time no see. i know a lot about you. like how you're TWENTY THREE, how you're a DANCE major,  and in fact.. how you BURNED DOWN YOUR FAMILY ESTATE FOR THE INSURANCE MONEY, ACCIDENTALLY KILLING A TV REPAIR MAN THAT WAS INSIDE. would be a shame if it got out, wouldn't it ? so let's play a game. 𝚃𝚁𝚄𝚃𝙷 𝙾𝚁 𝙳𝙰𝚁𝙴 ?

ahhh shit here we go again ... clown town ...... 

BACKSTORY

old money baby !! for those of u who have seen gossip girl …. u know nates grandpa …. the vanderbuilts…. thats her mom’s side of the family JSBDJWBJWD those of u who havent all u gotta know is that her grandpa (mom’s dad) is this super rich very old fashioned family oriented man -__-  he had 4 sons and 1 daughter (cleo’s mom) and very obviously favored his sons 

anyway he was always super hard on cleo’s mom !! very controlling of her life, very judgmental abt her choices, even though cleo’s mom was super desperate for his approval so she …. kinda revolved her life around what he wanted for her but it was never good enough </3 her mom literally married a doctor just to make this dumb old man happy and he was like ok hes not a surgeon though so … 

anyway cleo watched all this as she grew up and she was .. come se dice NOT happy abt it !! she was always super close and protective of her mom (not really close to her dad that much considering her mom really only married him for approval and safety) and she was always trying to get her mom to be like fuck the family !!! but her mom never did

and cleo’s grandpa never lightened up even as he got older … which was starting to give cleo some anxiety bc he was bound to die sooner or later and she was super nervous he was gonna be stingy abt his money and divide it unfairly giving more to his sons and very little to his daughter even though his daughter did everything this man wanted !!

so cleo started scheming….bc shes always been the type to be self sufficient like when she wants things to get done ? shes gonna do it herself ! she doesnt wait around for stuff to just fall into place also shes kinda impatient aha so she wasnt abt to just WAIT for her grandpa to die and see what his will said….

her first plan was just to steal the will. but then she was like ok not thinking big enough…..how can i make sure we get our money……then it all clicked. their family estate ….this old ass mansion…..where the whole family gathers for thanksgiving and christmas and her grandpa’s bday….she was gonna stage a little accident x

she was eighteen when she burned that baby to the ground ! she was methodical abt it like she did her research on their insurance plan, on how that money would be divided equally among the family automatically bc they were all listed as owners, she even looked up how to set the fire and where so it would look like an accident and not like an intentional burning….

cleo did all that and yet she failed to realize that their was a tv repair guy coming over to fix a problem with the wifi that day /: the worst part is she didnt even find out she accidentally killed someone bc there were no reports abt it like all the headlines mentioned was how this family estate that had stood for generations had tragically burned down </3

so cleo went off to college, majored in dance despite her grandpa pushing for all his grandchildren to have practical majors bc she refuses to bend to his will the way her mom did, and all was well…..for the first two years.

then comes christmas of her junior year of college where her grandpa gets too drunk and lets it slip he’d covered up a DEATH the day of the fire. cleo was like im sorry can u repeat that…and he lets the family know that there was a repair guy inside the house when it went up in flames and that he paid off the police in order to avoid being sued by the dead man’s family since all the reports were saying the estate had outdated electrical and thats why it caught fire

thats when cleo realized she fucked up <3 not only did she burn down their estate she also KILLED A MAN and it’s her fault it got covered up and that his family will never get closure bc she made it look like the estate had fucked up electrical when she set the fire in order to be able to get the insurance money 

so that was really fun for her junior and senior year have been so great for her <3 shes great <3 JSDBWBDJWBDJW

ok now moving to personality..

PERSONALITY AND TIDBITS 

cleo’s super protective over the ppl she loves (like her mom) and can be loyal to a fault !! will go to extremes to protect those she really cares about (like burning the estate down aha) but the second u cross her shes not quick to forgive and she will hold a grudge til the day she dies /: 

shes stubborn like super stubborn….the type of person that u cant force to do anything or change their opinion abt anything like if its not her choice ? shes not gonna do it JSBDWBDWBDJ has a tendency to not want to admit when she fucks up bc she’s a high key perfectionist so when she does fuck up shes like ok cool i’ll just die do not even look at me dont even talk about it

kinda over caring about what kind of an impression she gives off. like there are probably lots of people who when they first met her thought she was a bitch bc she likes to mind her business and can act kinda dry when she doesnt know you but cleo would just let them keep thinking that forever shes not here to change ppls minds 

if u do take the time to get to know her though ur gonna realize shes a lot nicer than she looks JSDBWBDBWJ and a lot less stuck up than u would think someone who comes from so much money would be. she never got the chance to develop into a spoiled brat since she was the black sheep of all her cousins <3 thank u grandpa 

speaking of being the black sheep. JDBWJBDJWBD she will take….any opportunity these days to piss her grandfather off. has a tendency to pull of crazy stunts like get herself arrested on a public nudity charge or order cases of dom perignon and have them delivered to the dining hall just bc she can. most of the time when ppl hear abt the things she does they dont believe cleo would have actually done something like that bc she really does not have a wild child vibe about her …. at all 

and shes not one JSBDWBDWJ like she parties a normal amount. if u ever see her doing something crazy 99% of the time she’s doing it to make someone mad or doing it because someone told her not to, and then the other 1% of the time shes doing it to cope with the fact that shes a murderer JSBDJWBJDWD

pretty liberal when it comes to sex but shes also not the type to always put her business out there. if u ask she’ll let u know but thats that ! also not a fan of drama of any sort if she has a problem she’ll let u know & expects others to do the same 

she loves to dance hehe she’s been a ballerina since she was 4 (it was the one hobby her mom made her do that actually stuck) and thats really like…..her true source of joy shes never happier than she is when shes dancing <3 literally does not care when ppl ask her wtf shes gonna do with that bc shes having fun babey and shes got money she doesnt need a real degree….. JSBDWBDWJDWJ

she looooves to dress nice. if ur chara dresses sloppy or ugly shes gonna buy them a designer fit and ask that they wear it just so things can look aesthetically pleasing JSBDJWBDBWJDBJWBDJWBJ she loves her aesthetics….probably a bitch that has a bullet journal and actually keeps up with it 

loves to karaoke but she only ever sings 80′s songs and shes gotta be wasted first … a cat person !! but tries to make exceptions for the sake of everyone else… allergic to peanuts like deadly allergic she will die…coffee addict but she pretends to be a tea person just so she can post those cute pics on insta but then every time she makes tea shes like this shits nasty…loves rom coms she will defend rom coms and claim they are the superior movie genre til the day she dies if u even mention tarantino she will kill u on sight…..idk what else to say im running out of juice this is the end x pls plot x

[iobunny]

My Abuse Story - I Survived

(Let me know what to tag cuz i’m out of it right now.)

I'm going to write this post like I'm writing a diary entry, or typing it to someone who would read it. I don't mind if people read it or not, I just want to get this out there while I'm in the mood to talk about what happened to me. I've kept this bottled up for a long time from people, and, I think it's starting to take a toll on me. I just want to get this out there before I decide against it, and, maybe delete it afterwards. (Forgive me for any spelling/grammatical errors, and I'm sorry if it's too long and boring. ) (Some things will be left out because I refuse to even acknowledge them. I only feel comfortable of certain things I want to talk about... I'm sorry.)

Okay, cracks knuckles here we go...

I'm 21 years old. I'm 4'11, 76 lbs, and I suffer from OCD, anxiety, and depression. I like to draw and write, and being with my friends and my sister means everything to me. Someday, I want to be a forensic investigator or a paralegal. Psychology and crime really interest me, and still do to this day. I was in college, and I was just like any other college student. Worked, studied, being lazy and not studying or doing work when I was supposed to be, all of that good stuff. Then I met him...

He was 6'0, around 270 – 280 lbs. He was popular and had a lot of friends, and a lot of girls who admired him. He did a lot of sports, and exercised on his free time. He was attractive, and to top it off he had a good heart and an interesting sense of humour. I felt some sort of attraction toward him, and I remember staying up till 5am to talk to him about our opinions of the world, talking about random nerdy things like League of Legends, we would talk about almost everything! ...

The very next day, at 10pm while we were on Skype, I asked him out... and I remember the surprised, happy-puppy look on his face when he said yes...

… and that was when my life turned into some sort of sick horror movie...

I remember always wanting to interview a sociopath... and I got too much what I bargained for. I didn't realize I was dating one!

I remembered he threatened suicide a lot, and said how horrible he was, and I did my best to make him feel better and be there for him. I remember running away from home (wasn't 21 at the time) just to comfort him.

What I didn't realize at the time was, this was all just a ploy to see how far I would go to care for him. His brother, who is closer to him than anybody else was at the time, told me he likes to do things for a reaction. To see what they would do and how would they react to something unexpected, whether it was positive news or not.

I'm gonna cut to the chase because I'm getting bad thoughts.

He bullied me. He degraded me, and tore every inch of self-esteem I had. Every little spirit, every little smile, all of it gone. It felt like a hungry demonic wolf just ripped through my body and ate everything I had, and left nothing but a pathetic skeleton to piss on.

I remember him saying to me, “___ you're useless. You're nothing but a dirty fucking skank, I'm only doing YOU a favour by dating you because nobody wants to be with some anorexic fucking rat like you. You're not good at anything and you're a college dropout. I deserve so much better than to be with you, but I feel so much pity for you that I have to be with you. Plus, it's too late to break up with you at this point, because I don't want my time to be wasted.”

“You're only good for having sex, and you're not even good at that.”

“You're so fucking retarded holy shit, how did I end up with you?”

“If I knew you were going to be this way, I would have never even thought about dating you.”

“You're so fucking ugly, but you have a tight vagina and that's all I care about at this point.”

“You think anybody is gonna believe what I say to you? Everyone thinks you're a cheating whore, they would never believe you.”

“There's so many prettier and better girls out there, you're lucky I'm a faithful man and wouldn't cheat on you even though you would cheat on me in a heartbeat.” (Then he proceeded to show me the girls and their text messages towards him.)

I remember him beating me with a some weird, thick stick thing during the wintertime outside, because he wanted me to talk about my past relationship, and he covered my mouth when somebody walked by (this happened at nighttime, we were sitting on the hill from where his house was and his brother's girlfriend came home from work) and if he told me if I said any word to her, he would snap my neck right then and there. I pissed myself I was so scared. (I'm sorry for being gross, I was just so scared.)

I remember he drugged me and raped me. I remember waking up the next day feeling nothing like a used up toy. I felt like I wasn't good enough to be anything but just a personal fucktoy, and not even a good one at that.

He smothered me with a pillow, and I couldn't breathe and it was one of the scariest moments in my life. All I could think of was my family and friends, and how I would never see them again... and they would never know what happened to me. I was so scared to tell anyone because I was afraid he would find out and kill my family and friends.

I remember he told me, “If you ever tell anyone, I would kill all of your family members, kill your pets, kill you, then myself.”

He admitted to me he used to be a gang member with his “dad” (his father is a scumbag loser), he personally had to do awful shit to prove his worth, and I truly believe he killed someone before. He had some scars to prove it, both physically and mentally.

I remember feeling his big ass hands around my neck and just squeezing the life out of me. My throat still hurts sometimes, but I don't think it's because of that. I think it's because I get really nervous and I just can't breathe. I still have anxiety, but not because of that. I was born with it. I mean, it could be? But I have no clue. My rib cage still hurts when he sat on top of me, I still can't lay in certain positions because it would really hurt my breathing!

He told me several times how he would kill me. He would take me to one of the big forests his city had that no one really goes to unless you want to explore shit or do drugs, and he would first rape me, then strangle me, then rape my dead body and just leave me. I told him my mother would start to worry but he said she won't be able to do shit because he'll just have his friends “quiet” her. I told him the cops would find out but he lied saying he did it before and they don't give a shit because it happens all the time in the city. (I realize now it's just a lie because people WOULD suspect something, but I didn't believe it at the time. I was stupid. I'm still pretty stupid, but not that stupid.)

We had unprotected sex, he wanted to have kids with me, to prove to me that I was faithful and I would never cheat on him. I was completely brainwashed at this point. I was literally his slave and I would do anything for him, even steal or kill myself if he wanted me to.

I stole alcohol for him (was under-aged at the time) just so he won't be upset at me... I did anything I can to keep him happy. I was constantly stepping around eggshells to have him happy and not have him upset because I was scared we would fight, he would threaten to break up with me, and hurt me.

(Holy shit I don't even realize how shaky I feel typing all of this.... I feel like I'm gonan cry)

I was alone at the time, bcause he didnt want me to have any friends or wear makeup or any type of “showy” clothing. I was controlled, he sniffed me to make sure I dont smell like a guy either.

While plagying league, I happened to meet some people who would eventually be my lifesavers. They lived in virginia, and they were all college kids having fun in life. They were so successful, so talented, and I thought to myself, Man, I want to be like them someday.

Long story short (I feel to worke dup at this point to keep typing), they saved my life. I moved down to virginia and I'm currently living with one of my friends, who I really look up to. She's like my mom, because she cares more about me and my wellbeing than my own mother! (Don't get me wrong, I love my biological mother to death and she loves me so much to, however, she's kind of selfihs... and wants me to stay up in NY where all of this shit happened. She drove me to my ex's place and would rather have me there than in VA where i'm far away from her. She treats me nicely to and would do anything to provide for me, so she's not a bad mother. But she's just... yea... hard to explain.(

I love each and every one of my friends, they saved me and made me feel happy again!

I'm currently awaiting my schedule from my burger king manager so I can start working, i'm looking for other jobs in the meantime too. I'm basically starting all over again in another state, where I feel safe and cared about.

I still have paranoid thoughts that nobody cares about me and everyone hates me, but I try not to believe them and my friens will tell me they care about me to disprove of that. I still feel worthless, I'm still a slut (but I embaraced it! No slut shaming) and I'm still stupid. I'm a hopeless romantic, I still love crime and psychology, and I really hope to go back to school one day and maybe help other people to get out of abusive situations ASAP.

I didn't save ME. My friends saved me. I just wanted to die, I still do, but not as much. I don't really cut myself anymore, I still drink to cope with everything, but hopefully I'll end that. I'm taking anti-depressants, sometimes I hope the alcohol and meds mix up and I end up getitng sick or somehing, but, whatever. I hate myself, but I have friends who care about me and I look at them like they're family, and that's all that really matters. I would do anything for them, and I hope I'll get enough money and pay them for everything they've done for me. They taught me so many things, and we shared so many laughs and jokes and I really want the best for them. I can be obnixous, annoying, stupid, and just annoy the living shit out of them, and I hope I stop that soon. I weird them out when I thank them so much, but im just so grateful they saved me and I have people that care about me y'know? Its weird

even after all of this nonsense, I hope my  ex gets the help he needs because I dont want him hurting anyone else anymore. I dont want him to kill someone, or someone dealing with the shit I dealt with or even worse.

I remember he told me he was gonna lock me in his godmother's basement and force-feed me nails until my stomach pops with nails poking thru them. Then rape me and have me shit myself and rats come and eat me.

so... thats my story. Thats it. I feel like shit now and Im gonna drink. Thanks to those that read, sorry about this. Bye.

[alizrak]

Finished watching Season 3 with my niece! (with bonus Rogue One!)

Hey! I finally finished watching Season 3 with my niece, and just like the previous two seasons, I made a compilation of most of her comments and impressions. As we had to wait for the Latin Spanish dubbed episodes to come out, we had the chance to also watch Rogue One, TPM, AtoC and the TCW movie. She had a meltdown with the S2 finale a couple of months ago so everything was still fresh for her. My own comments to her are in double brackets.

STEPS INTO SHADOW

“Where is Kanan? Why is Kanan not there? He’s always on the mission with them. Oh god, he’s dead, is he?”, ((The episode is just starting, watch)), “He’s dead in life…!! [wails]”

“WHAT? IS THAT EZRA!? How many years have passed?? I hate his new haircut, but… but he looks so grown up! And thin. Very thin. He’s a grown up noodle” (( HAHAHAHAHA)))

“Hey, I remember him! The pirate guy!”

“Woah. Ezra got a new gun”, ((blaster)), “Yes! He’s getting good! WOW! LOOK AT THOSE MOVES! Acrobatic fighting! He’s amazing now!”

“Great! He also got better with the Force. He’s going to-… [the walker scene plays out]… Oh no… Oh no! HE’S TURNING TO THE DARKSIDE! Kanan definitely didn’t teach him that! Who taught him that?? MAUL?”

“Ezra needs to chill, he’s too angry. The darkside will-… [holocron glows inside the helmet]. No. No. NO. Don’t touch the helmet. Put it down! NO. THE SITH HOLOCRON!?? NO! So dumb!! Haven’t you learn anything!?? Kanan needs to scold him! Set him straight!”

“Kanan is not there in the meeting either… ARRGH! Why wont they show him! That’s what we all want to know! They are making us suffer! [squirms on her seat]”

“FINALLY!”

“Kanan also changed, got older”, ((Just the beard))

“Is that a real voice? Is the sith holocron speaking to Kanan too? Nooo”

“Oh, ♫ here comes the scolding~! ♪”

“See? Only someone who uses the darkside can open it. Ezra’s going to use both! Light and dark”, (([poker face]))

“Yeah, take it from him. Make sure he doesn’t have it. It’s for your own good!… -[GASP] Talking back to Kanan! The nerve! He should ground him”

“Who is talking to Kanan? Is it a bad guy? He should be careful, it could be a trap”

[Bendu appears] “What is THAT!?”

“[eyes widen] Ashla? Bogan? He’s the one in the MIDDLE? THE BENDU!?? [starts going hype on her seat] SEE! THAT’S EZRA! EZRA IS LIKE HIM! Light and dark! He’s BENDU too!”

“He’s going to teach him how to see better with the Force? Neat”

“Who’s that scary blue guy”, ((His name is Grand Admiral Thrawn. He’s very intelligent and dangerous)), “I can tell”

“He can see the spiders now! And yes, yes, Ezra needs you right about now! Go!”

“Hahaha recovery operation”

“The phantom fell! D: Hera is going to be angry”

“Don’t worry Ezra. I’m so glad I know Hera and Kanan are on the way”

“Kanan should tell Ezra with the Force that he’s here to rescue him. He can do that, right?”

“He better catch him”

“Aww… they made up. Good!”

THE HOLOCRONS OF FATE

“Ezra still wants to use the holocron? Doesn’t he learn anything?”

“Oh. OH NO. MAUL. [RAGES]”

“Awesome! Bendu is going to be Ezra’s new teacher? To use the Light and the Dark?”

“I hate the spiders”

“Yeah, Sabine and Zeb are good, but they are no match against MAUL”

“Well, Kanan might have forgive him, but I still think THIS IS YOUR FAULT EZRA! HE WILL NEVER SEE HERA’S FACE! Ugh! I want to punch him!… and maybe hug him later, but slap him for sure!”

“Loook awaaaaay. LISTEN TO YOUR DAD”

((Who do you think Maul’s talking about? )) “Well, of course… [roll eyes] Obi Wan”

ANTILLES EXTRACTION

“Uuuh Sabine is going into the academy! Sneaky!”

“It’s nice that Ezra is worried about her”

[Kallus finds them] “Oh no, Agent Kallus is going to sto-…” [stares at me in disbelief] D: “Did he just… became a good guy?” ((Well, he still owed Zeb, remember)) “Yeah… you might be right”

HERAS’S HEROES

“Why are they risking going inside? Just for… that thing?”

“That blue guy will figure out she was a spy. He’s good.”

“See, he did.”

THE LAST BATTLE

“Those are the same droids we fight on Disney Infinity! This is awesome!” Note: She hasn’t seen clone wars or PT at this point.

“They have Zeb as a prize? Hahahaha”

“How was Rex programmed? Is he a also half robot?”

“Uhm… Ezra is good making friends”

“Yay! They got a new ship!”

IMPERIAL SUPERCOMMANDOS

“Who’s that again?” ((Fenn Rau)) “….who?”

“Why are the Mandalorians attacking them?”

“Her mom is BAD?”

“Hahahahaha, Ezra’s worried about his personal space! Look at his face!”

“They should just beat another mandalorian and steal his jetpack so Ezra can fly away with her”

“NO! THE JETPACK WAS SHOT!”

“She’s going to fix it, right?”

IRON SQUADRON

“They are going to regret not following Hera’s orders”

“Woah, Ezra, you are all mature now…. IS STILL YOUR FAULT KANAN LOST HIS EYES THO!”

“I think I can understand what Chopper says now”

“Now THAT is a Star Destroyer”

“Ezra and the others should just have left them” ((HAHAHAHAHA))

The Wynkahthu Job

“Yeah… Ezra trusts the wrong people easily. Like Maul. THANKS EZRA”

AN INSIDE MAN

“Who is that guy again?”, ((Ryder. From Season 2. The man who told Ezra his parents were dead)) “Uhmm….:|”

“Wait… is Thrawn going to make him ride the bike?… uh-oh… is he injured or…?” ((He’s gone)) “HE EXPLODED?”

“I LOVE WHEN THEY STEAL THE UNIFORMS. They just look at each other and it’s like they know what the other is thinking!” ((That’s kind of an ability with the Force too…)) “It’s awesome”

“Oh… there he is. Agent Kallus again. Ugh. Heh, at least he doesn’t know-… NOPE. HE KNOWS! HE KNOWS! …wait WHAT? He’s HELPING THEM? HE IS FULCRUM!? WHAT!? WHAAAAAAAAAT? He’s been a guy good all along?? BUT HE HURT THEM BEFORE!” ((It’s been only recently… maybe since that episode with Zeb. He helped Sabine, right?)) “YEAH BUT-… why does he stays with the Empire then!?” ((He’s a spy. He needs to keep face!)) “Is he going to come along with them?”

“WHAT? How… How does Thrawn knows what are they going to do?? He’s TOO SMART! D:”

“Ah, Ezra is smart by using the other walker as cover… small cover but its something”

“Oh, was that woman the wife of the guy who exploded? His… young wife? She does look young.”

“Thrawn knows it’s Kallus. He KNOWS it’s him. Thrawn is too smart! D:”

VISIONS AND VOICES

“That was a voice. Someone is calling Ezra. uh-oh… Ezra is going crazy”

“Oh no, no, no, no… it’s Maul, right? It has to be Maul”

“TELL THEM EZRA! SO MOM AND DAD CAN HELP YOU!”

“NO! IT’s RIGHT BEHIND-… WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM! IS EZRA DEAD!? He just fainted right? RIGHT? Oh, look at them…! They are all worried about him! EVERYONE IS WORRIED ABOUT EZRA! THEY ALL LOVE HIM” [starts sobbing] ((hahahahah, yeah, they all worry about-…wait… are you actually crying??)) “YES. They have become a real family! I’m so proud of them! They care about each other! It’s so beautiful!” (( [comforts/hugs her] o___________o [POTENTIAL DEAD OF KANAN AND EZRA STARTS MAKING ME FUCKING SWEAT] ))

“Look at them! They are waiting by his bedside! [dries tears]” (( .____. -OMFG- ))

“He is REALLY going crazy”

“Bendu is going to help them right?”

“Don’t turn around, don’t turn around, don’t- WAAAAAAAH!”

“He’s not your apprentice! Go Kanan! KILL HIM!”

“Well, Maul is right. They do need to defeat the sith. Uhmm… ok”

“He’s not going to hurt Ezra, is he?” ((No, remember when he said he was only loyal to him?)) “Yeah, but I thought he was lying… and because he keeps hurting his friends”

“oh, nonononono… Maul’s starting to talking about himself. I hate when he does that because it makes me care for him. His past is so sad” ((shitshitshitshitshit))

“They killed everyone… all his people”

“What is that place?”

“Is that a lightsaber?” ((Yep… you have seen it. Remember the fight we saw? Of Maul vs Lord Sidious?)) “Uh… yeah, where he kills his brother” (( Maul also had another lightsaber. A black one)) “Oh, that’s right, who made that one? A sith?” ((No… keep watching ;) ))

“Sabine would surely know”

“wait… is he… IS HE GOING TO MAKE EZRA DRINK ALCOHOL!?” ((uh… no, that’s like a dark magic potion)) “IT IS ALCOHOL. EZRA CANT DRINK THAT! He’s not 18 yet!!” ((… yeah, he’s 17 but that still not alcohol)) “It is! LOOK! Maul just toasted with him!” ((No, it is not)) “Ezra is coughing. It is totally alcohol…” ((….I…. ok… ))

“What did they just see? I don’t understand” (( A desert planet with two suns… Tatooine)) “oooohhh… that’s right. Obi Wan.”

“What’s that-! GHOSTS! GET AWAY! DONT LET THEM TOUCH YOU!”

“NOOO THEY TOOK KANAN AND SABINE! NOOO! ITS YOUR FAULT, EZRA! AGAIN!”

“Master versus Student. Nope. NOPE. NOPE”

“FIGHT IT, KANAN! You are the best! You can shake their control!”

“Ezra needs to bring the others outside the cave. Lure them”

“…. like brothers? He misses his family. But is he going to hurt Ezra now??… uh? HE LEFT?” ((Yep. He’s not going to hurt him.)) “Woah… maybe he is loyal to him after all. Evil loyal”

“How is it possible that Sabine is using that lightsaber?? SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW!”

“Ezra, you are a genius!”

“Sabine is going to take the lightsaber with her, right? Just like the jetpack. AWESOME”

( BONUS COMMENTS FROM ROGUE ONE!!)

I wasn’t able to take my niece to Rogue One when it came out because she was off on vacation during the holidays, so I was waiting for the blu-ray to come out. To start, my niece understands this is “3.5” on the timeline. Rebels’ placement is still a little confusing for her. These were her comments and impressions.

Who’s that? why are they looking for them?“

Woah… those troopers… they don’t look the same. ((Death troopers)) Uh-oh.

What… what’s going on? I don’t understand. Why are they leaving the girl? ALONE?

Is that the bad guy from Rebels? ((You mean Tarkin? No. His name is Krennic)) what a weird name…

Trust the Force? Is she a Jedi like Ezra and Kanan?

Where is Darth Vader? Is Darth Vader in this movie?

And now she’s an orphan. Great. They should have just ran.

Why is she in prison? What did she do!?

WHERE ARE WE NOW? What’s going on!?? Why aren’t they explaining anything!??

Why did he shot that guy!? Is he really a good guy? Why-? What-?

WHAT

Ok, so… there’s a message… and that guy brought it and… it’s important for someone called Saw Guerrera? Who send it again?

So her father is with the Empire and made the Death Star? He was forced to do so, I guess.

They want to KILL HER DAD? Are these really the Rebels we know?? ((They think he’s making more weapons, they want to stop him))

K2 is really funny.

That guy looks Mexican. ((He is)) HE IS!? OH! GREAT! Did he have problems with his accent? ((They kept his accent… there are many accents in Star Wars)) Oh, that’s good! :D [NOTE: We are Mexican]

What are they going to do to the pilot?? ((read his mind with that monster)) But he is not lying and he could lose his mind! ((Well, Saw Guerrera is an extremist, right?)) Overkill.

[Chirrut appears] Oh no… no. NO! HE REMINDS ME OF KANAN! HIS EYES! NOOO!

Kyber Crystals? ((Jedi use that for their lightsabers. Like Ezra, remember? It makes the laser.)) Oh… OOOOH, that’s right!

Is he a Jedi? ((Nope. A guard. He feels the Force but can’t use it like Ezra and Kanan))

Jyn can fight!

The blind guy is going to kick everyone’s butt…. THERE.

Hahahaha he’s blind. It won’t matter if they cover his face.

Why does Saw sound like that? ((There is something wrong with his lungs.)) The actor’s or the character’s? ((The Character))

He left her! He raised and left her! But why? He seems to like her enough.

[Galen’s message plays] oh… he did all of this… for her… [sniffles] …this is the first time I cry with a movie.

They are not shooting the Death Star right at them, right? RIGHT? OH NO. RUN! RUN!

He still wants to kill her dad?? He can’t do that! He wants to save them!

Chirrut is going to feel his bad intentions with the Force.

Does he look like a killer? xD Hahahaha.

Yay, the Rebels are sending help. ((Not, really, they are going to bomb the lab)) WHAT!? NO!!

Why won’t she start shooting!? Kill Krennic! He’s right there!

Grab your dad and get out of there!… oh, he’s not going to make it? It didn’t look that bad… :(

What planet is this? (( "Where Jedi go to die?”)) oh. OOOOH.

Hahaha Krennic is scared. Darth Vader is so intimidating.

Ohhhh, hahahaha, that was a great joke. He’s good! xD

They don’t believe her? bah… I would believe her.

((Did you hear that?)) Huh? ((They are calling for General Syndulla)) Yeah. (( Hera Syndulla)) Yeah, so? ….. [beat] …. [eyes widen] HERA? HERA SYNDULLA!? IS SHE IN THE MOVIE!? WHERE!? WHERE!? ((It was just a mention)) For the fans?

Sorry, I’m trying to see if I can spot anyone from Rebels in the background. ((Not yet. I’ll tell you when))

Will the others come too? Are they volunteering? That’s good. But they are so few…

[Jyn gives the speech] You know… I want you to know… I love how the main character is a woman in the new movies. It’s just so cool. Like with Rey. I love it. (( I know))

Why is Hera not helping them? (( I don’t know, maybe she had another mission?))

What a pretty planet. Was all that made with the computer? ((Most of that place is real… the bigger buildings are not)) With like… all the little islands and stuff? ((Yep! Is a beautiful place! Maldives, I believe)) Woah.

Hahaha they stole the uniforms. Classic.

You know, I like how Star Wars doesn’t show much blood everywhere. They get shot but is not like BLEARGH IM BLEEDING OUT. I rather watch it like this.

[I pause it just in time] ((DO YOU SEE HIM??)) CHOPPER! THERE’S CHOPPER!! I LOVE HIM!

Wooo! Here they come helping! YEAH!

WALKERS! RUN! RUNRUNRUNRUN!

They closed the barrier! They need to send the files through WiFi? ((Uhm…Yeah, kinda? lol ))

THERE’S THE GHOST! [several times through the battle]

Oh No, they are shooting K2. No. No, no, no. Please… not him… oh no.

Chirrut… the Force is with him…

Throw the granade away Bhodi-!…too late…

They are all dying.

She’s very strong to be able to climb like that. Crossfit?

I can imagine Hera flying through all of that and like Kanan and Zeb on the turrets shooting at all those TIE. ((We don’t know if Kanan and Ezra are around at this time. Yoda says Luke is the last Jedi on the other movies)) [looks at me dead serious] I don’t care what Yoda says. I don’t care if Luke is not the last Jedi. All I care is that Ezra and Kanan are alive. That’s it! They already took his eyes! THAT’S ENOUGH!“

Send the files through the wifi! NOW!

Who’s there in the hallway? As long as is not-… yeah, it’s him. They are dead.

Oh, OH, RUN. NOW! GO GO GO! Hahahaha [CHEERS] THEY DID IT! IT WAS A CLOSE CALL!

[GASPS] PRINCES LEIA! How did they make her look so young!?? AMAZING!

GHOSTS OF GEONOSIS

"SAW GUERRERA!”

“Where is Jyn? Is she going to show up here?”

“Kanan can sense him with the force”

“Woah Kanan is amazing! So cool! He’s the best!”

“hahaha, not a Skywalker”

“Those droids are too much for Zeb and Sabine”

“I think the alien bug is scared”

“Saw is really extreme”

“Ezra is good at making friends”

“When will Saw get his funny voice?”

“NOOOO, he only wants to protect the egg! Saw is being just MEAN!”

“Poor Klic-Klac! STOP HIM EZRA! SLASH HIS HAND OFF!… ok, you can tackle him too, fine”

“Sabine got her jetpack fixed! YAY! She’s going to kick their butts!!”

WARHEAD

“Well, AP5 is not wrong. Zeb is kinda like the muscle of the group. He’s not that smart”

“Woah, that robot is scary”

[The droid returns to the Star Destroyer] “They are screwed” ((because the droid is going to explode?)) “No, because Thrawn will know at least one his droids did found the Rebels.” ((…. O______O…. ))

“See? He now knows they are in one of those planets the droids visited. He’s too smart!”

TRIALS OF THE DARKSABER

“Uh… so this Mandalorian Jedi must have been, like, super cool”

“SABINE’S ROOM IS AWESOME! [SQUEAL]”

“Why is Sabine’s family angry with her? THEY ARE FAMILY”

“She doesn’t want the responsibility…. Heraaaa don’t push her”

“You know… [a little embarrassed] I kinda wish Sabine and Ezra had a thing together.” ((I don’t know if Sabine cares for Ezra like that. They don’t have time for dating anyway)) “There’s nothing wrong if she does… I mean… when she’s older and she wants kids” (( …even after the war, that might be complicated)) “But if she does…” ((…maybe… but so far they are like siblings)) “But they aren’t. They can end up happy together like Kanan and Hera” (( [stares ahead] Yes… end up happy like Kanan and Hera… o_____o [♪ HELLO DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND ]))

“She needs to be careful with the darksaber or she will get hurt- AAAAAAAAAH! DID SHE LOSE HER HAND!?” ((no, she just signed it)) “She’s going to get angry”

[Sabine opens up] “….woah….”

“They will fight for her. They are family”

LEGACY OF MANDALORE

“Uh, I don’t understand what she’s saying. What is she speaking?” ((Mandalorian))

“I bet one of those Mandalorians is a sibling of hers. That one must be her brother” (( O_O ok…)) “SEE!”

“She’s in trouble with her mom!”

“Ezra is so silly and cute at the same time. Just shut up, hahahaha”

“So sad. Her dad is a prisoner… Maybe Ezra and Kanan can help her rescue him. That would make everyone happy and they would join”

“[GASP] Her mom is a traitor! She will betray Sabine! HOW DARE SHE!?”

“Ezra is such a gentleman, giving Sabine his lightsaber to defend herself” ((xD))

“Is no one really going to help her!? REALLY??”

“She can fix her jetpack, right?”

“She’s not a normal Mandalorian. Maybe she- [GASP] SHE GOT SHOT!? OH GOD, NOO!! HE SHOT HER!… ah, ok, it was her mom. GOOD JOB MOM!”

“Wa-wait… she’s staying!? WHAT!…. [sigh] Ok, ok, she’s right. She needs to save her dad and her people… [beat]… IS SHE NOT GOING TO GIVE EZRA A GOODBYE HUG!??”

THROUGH IMPERIAL EYES

[GASP] “What is Ezra doing here!?”

“He knows Fulcrum is Kallus, right??”

“YEAH! This is really dangerous Ezra! What were you thinking!?…Oh. They might know of Kallus? ok, then that’s fine then. They will need to flee quickly”

“What are those lizard things in Thrawn’s office?”

“Thrawn knows is Kallus. He knows. He’s just waiting for him to slip”

“Hahaha stop doing that… good old times”

“Not even Thrawn’s stormtroopers can resist the mind trick”

“Ezra! Push the rock on top of Thrawn! USE THE FORCE NOW! SQUISH HIM!”

“They think Ezra is Lyste. So funny!”

“‘You want to fill me in?’… :( … I keep forgeting Kanan can’t see… uuugh, WAAAAaaah! Why!? WHYYY!… [sigh]… seems like I’ll have to resign myself that he will stay like this forever…”

“W-what? Is Kallus staying!? AFTER ALL THEY WENT THROUGH!? IS HE STUPID? Thrawn knows it’s him! SO DUMB!”

“See? SEEE!? THRAWN KNOWS! UUUUUGH! [throws arms up] Great! GOOD JOB KALLUS!”

SECRET CARGO

“That droid again!”

“Uh-oh, these Rebel groups don’t like each other”

“Ezra knows how to fly those ships! Thanks Hera! He will make you proud!”

“That’s… that woman from the news” ((Do you remember her from Rogue One? The one that told Jyn they couldn’t do anything in the meeting)) “oh, right… so she joins the Rebels now”

“THE GHOST IS BURNING! NO HERA! NO! STOP! NOT THE GHOST. ITS YOUR BABY”

“Well, those ships really got there fast… like… too fast. She stopped talking and 'Hey! We are here!’. Weird.”

DOUBLE AGENT DROID

“Hahahah AP5 and Chopper are so funny”

“They are going to hack Chopper!? FIGHT IT CHOPPER!”

“AP5’s going to realize something is wrong. He’s being too nice”

“Careful with the codes! and with the base location!”

“No!… AP5 is lost in space! They can go back for him, right?”

“Yeah! Don’t mess with her droid!”

“YEAAAH EXPLOSIONS! Sabine would love this! Too bad she’s not here.”

“HAHAHAHAHAHA, He’s singing! HAHAHAHAHA”

TWIN SUNS

“Who’s that… Maul…”

“Easy Maul. I know a way to bring Kenobi out. Just use a kid. A young one preferably. That should work. It’s what I would do if I was evil… see? He’s going to use Ezra” (( [nervous laugh] ))

“I still don’t get it” ((What?)) “Why does Maul want to kill Obi Wan? What does he expect to happen?” ((Maybe feel better?)) “But Maul already made him suffer before and did nothing for him… now he wants to kill him again?” ((He doesn’t know any other way to fix the way he feels)) “Uhmmm… [unconvinced]”

“That’s Kanan’s room… but where is Kanan??” (( [holding back a 'ON HERAS ROOM! YEAH’]))

“Why won’t they let him go? Hera… don’t be so strict. He’s a grown teenager now. Kanan can go with him and it would be quick”

“He’s going… ALONE?… ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? Ezra! He’s Maul! MAUL! You can’t beat MAUL alone! He’s way more experienced than you! Even if you got better, you don’t have a chance against him! Leave that to the grown ups!”

“It’s amazing what the Holocrons can do”

“Of course it was a trap”

“[worried look on her face] You know… When Ezra hears Maul’s voice and makes him go a little crazy… I fear he will end up evil like Anakin”

“He should have stayed home”

“OBI WAN! HE CAME TO RESCUE HIM”

“OH MY GOD! THERE HE IS! Is he going to teach Ezra too??”

“Aw… ok, he needs to leave. Yep, he was manipulated. Kenobi will deal with that. Ezra has no business here”

“Does Maul want to get slashed through the middle, AGAIN?”

“He’s protecting… OH THAT’S RIGHT! LUKE!”

[Maul and Obi Wan prepare to fight] ((That’s Qui-Gon’s pose… the one he used when Maul killed him)) “oooooh”

“Bye bye lightsaber and… wait… Obi Wan got him too!?”, ((Yep, on the chest))

“THE CHOSEN ONE! Obi Wan must feel awful because he believed Anakin was the Chosen before and loved him, but at least he has Luke now”

“Is Maul bipolar or what. First he wants to kill Obi Wan, then he gets all emotional being held by him like he loves him… He can’t make up his mind. Oh well, at least the Chosen One will avenge him, that’s what mattered to him”

“Is… is Ezra keeping that ship!? Woah!”

“The family is back together! As it should be!”

ZERO HOUR

“Thrawn knows about the attack. Well… Kallus better tell the others.”

“Wait… WAIT. THAT’S EZRA’S ROOM! From the begining!” ((Kallus is sending his messages from that tower)) “SO COOL!”

“…what… THRAWN! Oh no…”

“Thrawn is going to win this fight… I don’t even know why Kallus thinks he can win. Just flee!”, ((He needs the message to reach them, he can’t leave before that))

“Those are the black troopers! From Rogue One! The really good ones!” ((Yep! Death Troopers))

“Heh, they had erased the planet from the maps… just like what happened with Kamino in the movies… but they couldn’t fool Thrawn either” ((Yeah, exactly, good catch. -Note: We saw TPM, AotC and TCW movies at this point… still need to watch RotS))

“Kanan still needs to teach him more things like a father… see? Ezra is right. Teach him more about life!”

“Wait, they even have a code signal to evacuate the whole base?” ((Well, yes, they need codes to know what to do, they are in war after all!))

“Heh, Kanan needs to go for Bendu”

“They can’t enter hyperspace… they can’t escape!”

“Mmmh… I don’t think Bendu is going to help them”

“What is Sato going to do? He rather die with a few…? Ok then”

“Oh… he rammed into the other ship-…WAIT! WHERE IS KALLUS!? He’s not in that one right? Oh! Phew! He was on the other ship with Thrawn. That was close”

“Well, now Hera is officially in charge of the whole base… not surprising”

“Kanan is making him angry. I think Bendu will end up attacking both sides”

“I still wonder if Ezra will end up in the Middle, like Bendu…”

“Why is he asking Mon Mothma for help?” ((She kinda became one of the leaders of the Rebellion, remember? When all the other ships showed up in the previous episodes)) “They won’t help… how ungrateful. Now what is Ezra going to do?” [“SABINE”] “What… WHAT? SABINE?? He can’t bring her into this! She has her own problems at home! He shouldn’t put her in more danger and there’s little they both can do!” ((He means her family, the Mandalorian)) “SNORTS HA! THEM? Please! The Mandalorians only care for their own people and their wars. You saw that. They are not going to help the Rebels just like that” (( [speechless] ))

“What is Thrawn’s plan now?” ((Attack them on ground and capture the higher ranks)) “What…? Why?” ((If he captures Hera and Dodona, he might be able to extract more information about the Rebellion and make an example of them by executing them later)) “Bah, Hera would die before revealing anything” ((They do have torture droids but they haven’t shown them in the show because this is for kids… they are very effective)) “Nah, Hera wouldn’t talk even then, they would have to kill her”

“How do shields work?” (( Sorry, I don’t know. Technology in Star Wars is sometimes a little fantastic… it just works)) “[unconvinced]”

“Oh no…. KANAN. KANAN FIND COVER NOW. NO. NO. NO! HE’S BLIND! STOP SHOOTING AT HIM!”

“That’s just funny because you are live! hahahahaha… yeah”

“I hate that they make Kanan 'look’ by turning his head around like he can still see. It confuses me…”

“I told you… the Mandalorians aren’t going to help Ezra”

“Ok, it won’t be an army… but I hope that’s enough to help them escape”

“Yeah, Kallus is not like Thrawn. He’s not blue! hahahahaha”

“Zeb and Rex are really good friends… I love how they fight together”

“They even brought those walkers! D:”

“The death troopers! They better run!”

“This is cliché… there’s a storm comming because OF COURSE it is [rolls eyes]” ((Isn’t it strange? This is a desert planet after all)) “Yeah, they have to get a storm in the story to make it feel more dramatic” ((well, you are not wrong but…))

“Ezra is here! Everybody run-!… HAHAHHAHA look how AP5 runs! HAHAHAHAH!”

“oh… is that… IS THAT BENDU?…”

“Ezra has a space suit!! HOW COOL!”

“Bendu is really going to attack both sides… Kanan better run. He’s reaaally angry at him”

“He’s the light, the dark, the one in the middle… it would be better if he was the one in charge of everything, instead of the Emperor. There wouldn’t be any fights” (( I’m… not sure about that))

“HAH! Thrawn thinks he can kill Bendu!… He-…what…he shot him down? WHAT!??? HE CAN’T DO THAT!”

“Is Pryce really going to throw him out to space??” ((did you catch Kallus’ smile there?)) “Yes! Maybe those two troopers are also spies of the Rebellion and they are going to help him escape!?” ((Erh… keep watching)) “Oh, well, that’s ok too… he’s very good fighting after all… only Thrawn has defeated him that badly”

“Is time to flee!”

“Do you see that Pryce!?? HUH! IN YOUR FACE! THEY ARE ESCAPING IN YOUR FACE! UUHH!! WOOOOOH!! [dances in front of the tv]”

[Bendu dissapears] “Heh…surprised, Thrawn?”

“Aaaaw… I don’t think I ever heard someone praising Kallus for a job well done like that… this is great, they are so accepting”

“They will make it happen!”

EXTRA:

Reaction to the Season 4 trailer: “Wait- wait… ’End like this’? Does- does she mean like 'in a good way’ or 'a bad way’?” ((…we don’t know…)) “Woah, this is very fast paced, very epic! Looks great!”

When told Season 4 is the last one: “WHAT!? WHY? Rebels is so good! What are they thinking? I still want more! They can’t do this!” [excruciating sounds]

When shown Forces of Destiny announcement and dolls: “They look amazing! I want to watch that series too and I want the dolls for Sabine, Ahsoka and Hera… there IS a Hera doll, right??” ((I sure hope so kiddo))

In general, I’m really freaking nervous with Season 4 because Kanan is pretty much her favorite character, and in her eyes Hera and Kanan are definitely together, being Ezra’s adoptive mom and dad. Her crying when Ezra fainted in Visions and Voices caught me completely off guard. He had just fainted. Dear lord, I don’t want think the problem I’m going to have in my hands with her mom if she returns home an emotional mess if they die. I don’t know about other target audience, but she made it clear to me during Rogue One that they MUST be alive. And I’m just here, praying and hoping she’s right.

Submitted May 10, 2017 at 01:00PM via reddit http://ift.tt/2q3ZzsQ

[dreamlordmorpheus]

1, 2, 3, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, and 22 for Ary. 1, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 20, 21, 25 for Saiorse and Siobhan. Yes, this is a long list. I thought I'd give you something to keep you occupied :P

(😍😍😍 ur the bestttt)

1: Origins! How did you come up with the concept for your OC? Ary was a bit of a mishmash to be honest. Mostly I really wanted to wear a Phantom of the Opera mask to blackwatch, so I came up with a whole spiraling backstory to justify it. i also wanted to get to know other people’s characters, so I decided to play someone who was outgoing and humorous, but a bit rough around the edges. 

2: Were they originally well received by the fandom? Or if they’re fandomless, did the RP community take to them right away or was it hard to get attention? no fandom, but most of my LARP friends noticed Ary right away. (they’re pretty chatty so it’s hard to miss them) their personality developed from session to session based on what i thought worked and by the end of their arc they were pretty well-liked. 

3: Has your OC gone through different incarnations during their stay on Tumblr? Were they reimagined or have they stayed the same all this time? originally ary was supposed to be a lot less vocal cause I was pretty shy, but i soon found out that they weren’t having that at all. 

9: What is your OC like when at work? Are they diligent? Slacker? Do they get along with their co-workers? Ary works hard, but also jokes around a lot. if they don’t like the job they won’t devote a lot of effort to it, but no matter what they always try to befriend their co-workers. 

10: How do they deal with strangers? Ary is pretty distrustful of strangers at first, but it doesn’t take much to get them to befriend them. although truly earning their trust takes time, they tend to see the best in people and will readily give anyone a chance. 

11: Is there a place they go to in order to escape the world, the stresses of life? What’s their favourite place? Ary’s hometown is a dream-city called Skerry, so they like to visit it in their sleep. the alleys of Skerry are filled with all sorts of different characters and people, and they consider it to be home. 

12: What scent calms them? Reminds them of home or something soothing? their favorite smell is a type of flower that doesn’t actually exist in the waking world, but was a popular perfume for sex workers in Skerry and worn by their caretaker (mother or sister? its unclear). 

13: Do they have any favourite foods? Would they eat it all the time if they had the chance? What do they hate to eat? cinnamon cookies! anything cinnamon and sweet, really. they’ve actually tried to survive off cookies alone. it didn’t work. they hate anything minty. 

14: Pet peeves. Tell us what would really tick them off. Do they have a Berserk Button? pretty basic, mostly just people hurting their friends. although ary is pretty easy-going, once you get them truly angry then you’re kinda fucked. 

15: Does your OC have any awful fears? Do they get paralyzed with fear or can they work through their fears? Ary is terrified of water, to the point where baths have been a problem. they’ve been able to work through this a little bit thanks to a lovely magical hot tub, but still refuse to submerge. 

16: What are concepts they value? Virtues? What do they look down upon? Ary values honesty and hard work! if you lie to them they’ll pretty much never forgive you. ironically enough, they’re also a bit of a thief and scoff at people’s concepts of traditional virtue. (”how can you be honest if you’re a thief?” people may ask. “m8 i dont lie about stealing shit, its just that nobody really asks.” “have you stolen stuff from me????” “haha totally”) 

17: Do they have any guilty pleasures? They embarrassed about them? Do they flaunt them? pretty girls. they’re completely unashamed about it and full of innuendo. 

18: Do they have a guilty conscience? Why? Did they ever do something they totally regretted? massive survivor’s guilt for pretty much everything. their instinctive reaction to a tragedy is to blame themselves. they have a lot of regrets, but are doing their best to move past them. 

20: What are Tropes you associate with your muse? they’re somewhat of a Jerk With a Heart of Gold and also someone who Really Gets Around. also Have I Mentioned I Am Gay. 

21: Name an embarrassing situation that your muse has been in. they tried to nab a vampire’s hair ribbon and almost started an all-out fight. it was bad. 

22: If given a million dollars, what would your OC do? hire a hot female cook to bake them cookies all day every day. and then hoard some it and spend the rest on lavish gifts for their friends. 

wow, i haven’t talked a lot about ary in a while! i miss them and this was super fun. now, onto the twins! 

1: Origins! How did you come up with the concept for your OC? I basically took some basic character archetypes and designed characters around them. Siobhan’s original moniker was “woodland witch”, while Saoirse’s was “monster hunter”. the focus on both of them was initially how they would interact with campers, and then they sort of ran away from me. 

6: What is your OC’s family situation? Do they get along? Do they fight? Or are they alone? both parents are dead (passed peacefully a while ago) and they’re not at all on speaking terms. Siobhan considers her animal and creature friends to be family, while Saoirse is closest to her “sisters” at the all-female monster hunting group she used to be a part of. 

7: What does your OC look for in a friend? Do they value friendship a lot? Siobhan values kindness and caring, and has many many friends. Saoirse looks for honesty and loyalty, and only has a few people she’s super close to. 

8: What does your OC look for in a significant other? Are they looking at all? Siobhan isn’t looking, and probably won’t ever be (aro ace). Saoirse isn’t currently looking either, but her past string of lovers tended to be hardened fighters like herself (mostly female but a few men thrown in there as well). 

9: What is your OC like when at work? Are they diligent? Slacker? Do they get along with their co-workers? already answered for Siobhan, but Saoirse is very diligent. she gets along with her co-workers as much as is needed to survive, but doesn’t really make friends on the job. (considering that the job is killing things, this makes sense)

10: How do they deal with strangers? Siobhan loves strangers! Saoirse does not. this is the biggest fundamental difference between them - their reaction to the unknown. 

11: Is there a place they go to in order to escape the world, the stresses of life? What’s their favourite place? Siobhan loves the woods, in particular a little brook that runs by her home. if she’s feeling overwhelmed, she’ll go and swim in one of the deep pools there. Saoirse doesn’t currently have a physical place to go to, but she likes to sit in a quiet place and think about her childhood home. her safe place is more mental. 

12: What scent calms them? Reminds them of home or something soothing? Siobhan likes the smell of wet leaves on the ground. Saoirse loves the smell of woodsmoke on a cold day. 

13: Do they have any favourite foods? Would they eat it all the time if they had the chance? What do they hate to eat? Siobhan really likes rare meat and candied flowers. its a fae thing. she won’t eat anything that’s been boiled, as she says boiling “kills the flavor”. in contrast, Saoirse’s favorite food is stew/soup of any kind. she doesnt like anything overly sweet. 

14: Pet peeves. Tell us what would really tick them off. Do they have a Berserk Button? already answered Siobhan’s. Saoirse is actually like her sister in this regard, she doesn’t get angry very often. mostly she gets mad as a defense mechanism when something surprises her. given her cynical nature, this rarely happens. 

15: Does your OC have any awful fears? Do they get paralyzed with fear or can they work through their fears? Siobhan is terrified of people finding out her true nature and hating her for it. she has nightmares of mobs hunting her down and setting her home on fire. she generally doesn’t like to acknowledge this fear and therefore doesn’t attempt to work through it. Saoirse is scared of monsters. her coping mechanism involves killing them, which isn’t healthy, but it does work. 

16: What are concepts they value? Virtues? What do they look down upon? Siobhan values kindness above all else. she’s very Neutral Good. Saoirse values physical strength and proficiency. she’s pretty Lawful Good. (it took me a while to figure out her alignment, but i eventually got it down. Saoirse likes to set rules for herself and follow them, and sees the world in very black and white terms. in her eyes, there is Good and there is Evil and there is nothing in between.)

17: Do they have any guilty pleasures? They embarrassed about them? Do they flaunt them? already answered for Siobhan - honey! Saoirse’s is music. she’s pretty shy about it, but she loves listening to people singing and play instruments. she learned how to play piano when she was young, but won’t perform in front of people. 

18: Do they have a guilty conscience? Why? Did they ever do something they totally regretted? Siobhan blames herself for her sister’s injury. Saoirse regrets blaming her sister for her injury. 

19: Have they ever been injured? Sick? How do they deal with it? Siobhan doesn’t really get sick. her response to injury is usually confusion. she takes care of it and functions the best she can. Saoirse would get terrible migraines as a child and doesn’t deal well with injury. she tries to push through the pain, which usually leaves her in worse condition. 

20: What are Tropes you associate with your muse? oh man i’m not super familiar with tropes let’s leave that for another day. 

21: Name an embarrassing situation that your muse has been in. Siobhan once got stuck in a tree trying to rescue a squirrel. she didn’t know that squirrels can climb trees. Saoirse once got startled by a giant cockroach and proceeded to lightning bolt it. that section of the house had to be rebuilt. 

25: What are your plans for your muse in the future? if all goes well, Siobhan is going to work with the Woodland Realm and teach them about earthworms and decomposition! fingers crossed. Saoirse is going to teach skills to various houses and probably hang around with the Blackwatch. if all does not go well, they’ll probably do the same thing but in a diminished capacity. 

(thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!)