#you don't understand i love Cynthia so much guys

[thespianwordnerd]

Just watched the play episode of Rise of the Pink Ladies and I am feeling so so normal about the pilgrim's hands scene again. So so normal.

[smytherines]

☠ agent curt mega pretty pleaseeee

Ooooohhh angry/violent headcanon for Curt. This is an interesting one. I wrote waaaay too much here and I'm probably gonna end up in fandom jail for this one, but...

I mean we've talked about this before, but I genuinely do not see the horrible toxic manipulative Owen/little innocent cinnamon roll Curt dynamic that a lot of people seem to get from A1P1. It just doesn't track for me with what actually happens in that scene. Interpretation is an art, and everyone's art style is different, I just personally can't see anything to support it.

For me, pre-fall curtwen is a relationship of equals. Equals who often irritated each other because they were very different people (but also because they were very similar people), equals who didn't have any real concept of how to have a healthy relationship (especially with another man), equals who individually had a lot of flaws and messed up coping mechanisms and (in my headcanon at least) neurodevelopmental disabilities that made them uniquely suited for espionage, but also gave them all sorts of weird problems that they had no way of understanding or fixing. For me, they each gave as good as they got. For better or worse.

So keeping that in mind, I think about that part of A1P1 where Cynthia is insulting Curt while trying to recruit Owen to A.S.S., because that interaction, and what comes after it, is very important for my understanding of who pre-fall Curt was as a person.

Even though Owen doesn't entertain the idea of working for A.S.S. for even a second, Curt gets jealous, and pissed off, and hangs up on Cynthia. I think Owen's line is "What are you, jealous? You know I'd never work for the Americans," and its incredulous, like its a silly thing for Curt to get upset about because Owen would never even consider it. Curt pulls his flask out as soon as the call is over, and he responds to Owen pretty sharply by saying "Oh I do know that you couldn't handle it." He responds as if Owen has threatened his status at A.S.S.

We see this dynamic again when Owen chastises him for drinking, and Curt mocks his accent while saying "not until the jobs done." We see it again when Owen gestures to the banana peel like "what are you doing," and Curt responds fairly harshly with (I think, I'm doing this off memory) "this whole place is about to be garbage anyways, who gives a shit."

Those moments, for me, imply that Curt gets embarrassed easily, he gets jealous easily, and that he reacts very defensively when he is criticized, which is just Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria 101. It couldn't get more typical RSD than that. And each criticism, even though they're individually pretty mild, just seems to make him act more recklessly during A1P1, like he's trying to show that actually he's a badass and Owen just worries too much. Again, very RSD.

The thing about RSD is that- especially when you don't know you have it- sometimes your first impulse is to get furious. Not annoyed. Not irritated. But like blood pulsing in your ears, seeing red kind of furious. Your heart rate elevates. It's like your body goes into fight or flight, and more often than not your body is going to pick fight. And because ADHD is a lifelong thing, unless you're getting treatment or at least a diagnosis and information, you literally have no concept that this is not how other people react emotionally, so you justify your own behavior because you truly do not understand that this isn't normal (ask me how I know hahahaaa)

As much as we love them, and as much as I truly believe they loved each other, they probably got into a fair few fistfights over the years. These are two men who are accustomed to violence. Who are very good at violence. Who have a flirty torture scene and then tell the guy whose knees Owen just shot out that "you've just been used for sport" (Owen), and "I hope you had fun- I know we sure did" (Curt).

To me, pre-fall Curt seems like the type to put Owen down a lot with relatively minor digs "as a joke" (aka he is bad with feelings), and to some degree it doesn't bother Owen that much because that's just how they are. They banter. But sometimes, maybe when Owen is tired or feeling particularly sensitive that day, he'll go straight for the jugular- zero in on the thing Curt is most sensitive about. With Curt its death by a thousand cuts, with Owen its a laser guided missle.

I've talked about this before too, but I think that by the time we get to A1P1 Curt probably already has a bit of a drinking problem. After the fall, drinking is just how he manages to survive his grief. But I think before the fall he could get miserable and sour and petty while drunk, take out his insecurities on the people around him, and probably on occasion just start fights because he's bored and will take any stimulation he can get.

I don't think this is just a thing he does with Owen either, I think this has probably been a problem for him his whole life. He feels things very close to the surface. He is very emotional, which is a thing you're not allowed to be as a man, as a boy/teen/man in the 30s, 40s, and 50s, and a thing that is very dangerous if you are a gay man during this time period.

He also has a big fucking ego. During the 54 Below concert spoken intros they describe what happens in A1P1 as "when these two spies are together they are gay and unstoppable- until Curt's ego gets in the way." And I think a big part of that ego is wrapped up in his performance of his gender. That if he's the very best at this extremely hypermasculine profession then nobody will notice any of the stereotypically feminine traits he has, no one will think he is actually sensitive and tender-hearted and more vulnerable than he appears. He thinks that performing stereotypical 1950s masculinity will insulate him from anyone ever finding out his secret- that he likes men, that he's in love with a man.

Also, ADHD can make you very impatient, easily bored, and Jesus let me tell you I know from experience that when an ADHDer gets too bored for too long, they get irritated. At everything, at nothing. So the combination of these factors makes me think that he probably was the kind of kid to get into scraps (especially at any suggestion that he was not masculine enough), the kind of adult who felt too much and got it out with aggression. He was a brawler. Spying helped focus his aggression. He got to still have it, but he got to feel like it was serving a noble purpose.

I do also think that, even if he gave Owen a lot of shit (particularly for the crime of not being American), if someone insulted Owen in front of him, or if one of their enemies hurt Owen, I fully believe Curt would go full-on berserker mode to defend Owen. So it isn't entirely a negative thing. He can utilize his anger and violence to protect people he loves too.

[rhapsodynew]

#On this day

Awarding The Beatles with The Order of The British Empire

George: "Brian was not invited to the palace. In my opinion, we were only allowed to invite someone from our family. He must have been annoyed in his heart. But he didn't show it."

Cynthia: "One thing was disappointing: the Beatle families were not invited to the palace for the ceremony. However, the guys didn't want that either: they were so nervous themselves that they didn't have enough to worry about their loved ones. We, their wives and girlfriends, really wanted to go with them, but the guys decided that it was better without us, since a real pandemonium of hysterical fans was expected at the palace. We watched everything on TV and were incredibly proud of them."

Tony Barrow: "The Beatles went to Buckingham Palace in John's shiny Rolls Royce Phantom 5 ("exactly the same as Elvis, but my windows are tinted")."

Barry Miles: "The group arrived at Buckingham Palace at 11 a.m. for the award ceremony in the Great Throne Room. Outside, about four thousand fans chanted "yee-yee-yee" and pressed the police, who tried to restrain them, and therefore could not prevent them from climbing the gates and lampposts at the palace.

John: "We were instructed in advance by some big guy, a guardsman."

Paul: "He took us aside and explained what we should do: "Approach Her Majesty like this, do not take your eyes off her, and do not speak to her until she speaks to you." And all that. It was pretty funny."

Barry Miles: "On this day, 189 more people were awarded, including six who were knighted."

George: "We were standing in a long queue. There must have been hundreds of people there."

Paul: "We were the only band there. Everyone was friendly to us."

John: "We signed autographs for everyone who was waiting with us to receive their medals."

Paul: "None of them said, "This is for my daughter, even though I don't understand what she sees in you!"

Barry Miles: "The Lord Chamberlain of the Royal Household, Lord Cobbold, read out the names of the members of The Beatles."

Paul: "This dude shouted, "George Harrison, John Lennon, Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr."

John: "When the names were read out and we got to Ringo Starr, we almost burst out laughing."

Paul: "The word "Starr" was a signal for us to step forward with our left foot, as instructed. It was like some kind of performance."

Ringo: "Then we bowed our heads and went to the Queen."

Barry Miles: "The Queen shook their hands, talked to each of them and attached an award."

John: "I really wanted to laugh. We were giggling like crazy all the time because we had just smoked a joint in the toilet at Buckingham Palace. We were very nervous."

George: "No, we didn't smoke marijuana before the ceremony. Just regular cigarettes. I have no doubt that years later John turned those cigarettes of ours into joints. What could be more terrible before meeting the Queen? Get high! But no, we didn't do that."

Ringo: "I was so worried that I won't remember anything anymore."

Tony Barrow: "After the ceremony, they were inspired, but nothing in their eyes, voices or other signs suggested that they were under the grass. I doubt they even took her to the palace, which was swarming with security forces of all levels."

John: "Although we didn't attach much importance to the royal family, you can't help but be impressed when you're in the palace, when you realize that you're standing in front of the queen. It was like a dream. Fine.

The music was playing, I looked at the ceiling – and it's not a bad ceiling. It was a historic moment. It's like you're in a museum."

Ringo: "The Queen was great. Of course, I'm a big fan of hers now. Obviously, she tried her best to make everyone feel calm and not nervous. When she handed me the order, she said: "I'm glad to give it to you," and I said, "Thank you."

John: "She was much more beautiful than in the photos."

Paul: "A charming woman. Cool! She was very friendly. She was like a mom to us."

John: "Just like Mom. She was so warm and sweet. She really calmed us down. I think the Queen really believes in all these things. I've always hated all these social events. All these wild events, all kinds of awards that we had to attend. It's all for show. You can see through everyone. I despise them. Maybe it's a class feeling? However, no. In fact, these people are fake."

Barry Miles: "The Beatles were awarded the Order of the British Empire, the lowest of the five categories of the order. His title ranks 120th out of 126 in the ranking system."

Ringo: "I was wondering if Brian was upset that he wasn't awarded this order. But he was always really happy for us. I think if he wanted to, he would even be knighted.

Barry Miles: "Immediately after the award ceremony, a press conference was organized in the bar of the Saville Theater, where the band members discussed their award and made comments about the protesting statements of the award recipients addressed to them."

Tony Barrow: "Brian Epstein was pleased with the Beatles' remarks that he deserved such an order."

George: "I brought the order home and put it in a drawer, and later put it on for shooting for Pepper's envelope, and Paul did the same. The order remained pinned to my Pepper coat for another year, and then I put it back in the box and put it in the closet."

John: "I keep the order in the smallest room of my house–in my office."

And closer to Christmas, John will give his order to Aunt Mimi.

What a pity that it was impossible to take pictures at Buckingham Palace!

[hwabang]

PLS MAKE A PART TWO FOR “when the first love returns” i genuinely loved it sm and cried a bit ngl… part two should be so fluffy and jake possibly proposing 🤔🤔

When the First Love Returns Pt. 2- Sim Jaeyun

Summary: Jake grovels after you almost took a break with him after his ex tried to break you guys up. He realizes just how afraid he is to lose you so moves up the date for his proposal plan

Genre: fluff fluff fluff

Warnings: fem!reader, established relationship, jake is so guilty omg, grovels a LOT, proposal. mention of reader not being Korean (?)

Author’s Note: the amount of people asking for a pt 2 to something i wasn't even confident posting in the first place made me so happy😭 hope this is what y'all wanted!

NOTICE: (the names used for side characters are fake names, with the exception of the enhypen members. the fake names don't represent any real life characters.)

(gif not mine!)

(moodboard is mine, pics off Pinterest)

Today was Minji's last day in Korea. Jake begged you to go to the airport with them but you really had a lot of work to get done, so you said goodbye to her in your apartment and sent her off with Jake.

On the way to the airport they didn't talk too much but they did have one last conversation before she went into the gate.

"Thank you for everything Jake," Minji started. "Sorry if I made you uncomfortable the other day."

Jake sighed. "Minji.. you're a good friend and I don't want this to ruin our whole group. But please, don't think we can ever be anything more than friends.. we dated for a year in high school and that was that. I love Y/N, a lot."

Minji nodded. "Yeah yeah, it was wrong of me to try and win you back.. I understand that now. Cynthia yelled at me a lot yesterday."

Jake let out a hearty laugh. "Yeah, she's had Y/N's back this whole time.. thanks for being so understanding Minji. Again you're a good friend of mine; let's keep it that way."

"Agreed. You're proposing this December in Australia right?"

"Actually... I'm proposing next week."

Minji's eyes widened with excitement. "What, no way! What happened, why the sudden change?!"

Jake rubbed the back of his neck feeling embarrassed. "I.. haven't been the best to her recently.. actually the night you were at your grandma's.. she wanted us to take a break."

Minji gasped. "Jake.. I'm so sorry."

He shook his head. "It's okay. We talked it through, I begged her not to do this, and she agreed. So I've just been, I don't know, scared? That night really shocked me so much.. I don't think I can wait till December. I'm moving all the plans around to next week."

"Jake that'a awesome! You got the hotel and flight tickets and all?"

"Yeah yeah, everything was booked yesterday."

Just then the last announcement for Minji's flight was made. She gave one last goodbye to Jake and headed to the gate as he made his way back to his car.

Jake had never felt so guilty like he did the past two days. It was eating him up; the fact that he gave another woman more attention than he gave you; the woman that you were uncomfortable with him being around. Every time he thought about it he winced and thanked God that you didn't leave him.

You had forgiven him; Jake loved you and you never once doubted that. But he didn't care– he'd make it up to you in the best way possible.

After leaving the airport he went to the ENHYPEN dorm to tell the news about him moving up his proposal plans and assigning them their roles. He then went to the company to talk to them about his decision. They already knew you Jake was proposing in December and were fine with it, but now Jake had to tell them the slight change in plans so they could have the statement ready by next week.

Once all of that was taken care of Jake headed back to the apartment and started cleaning. It wasn't messy; how could it be? You were so good at taking care of the house, taking care of him, taking care of your relationship when he'd mess it up..

Jake sighed as he walked into the empty house. You were just at work, he knew it of course. But he couldn't imagine how distraught he'd be if every single day he came home to an empty house, knowing you would never return.

Jake started by cleaning up the guest room and guest bathroom Minji had used; putting new sheets, changing the trash, wiping down the furniture. He then went on to clean the rest of the bathrooms in the house, then tidying up the kitchen and master bedroom. Once those were taken care of he took a 10 minute break to order food, and continued on cleaning the dining room and living room.

You were exhausted, having a hard day at work yourself. You trudged up to the front door and fumbled with your keys before the door swung open revealing a very happy yet tired Jake.

"Hi baby, you're home!" he exclaimed.

You giggled and pecked his lips as you walked into the house. "Hi my love, how was your day today?" As soon as you walked further into the house you immediately realized it was sparkling; everything was sparkling. You turned to Jake in shock who was standing there expectantly. "Jake.. did you clean the house while I was gone?"

He eagerly nodded. "Did I do a good job? Actually you can't judge just from seeing this.. I cleaned the guest bedroom, our room, the bathrooms and kitchen too!"

Your eyes were still widened in shock and you slowly wrapped your arms around Jake's neck. "Baby, I appreciate it but why'd you do all of that? I would've come home and done it anyways."

He wrapped his arms around you. "It's not fair that you have to do all of it," Jake pouted. "I live here too, this is my house too. I should take on some of the household responsibilities."

"You do honey! You have your own chores and I have mine."

Jake shook his head. "I just take the trash out and pay the bills once a month Y/N. You clean and cook almost everyday.. I come home every single day and appreciate it but I don't think I say it enough so I'm sorry. I genuinely appreciate everything you do, and after doing what you do for a day, I'm fucking exhausted."

You laughed as you pulled him into a hug. "Aww, thank you Jake. Really, I appreciate this a lot."

"Of course baby.. by the way, is it too late for you to put in some vacation days for next week?"

You raised an eyebrow at him. "What are you plotting now Sim Jaeyun?"

"Nah nah nothing.. I was thinking you and I could spend a couple days in the Maldives?"

"Maldives!? Jake, are you serious!?" you squealed.

Jake smiled, relieved you were this happy. The Maldives was a dream destination for you; you had always talked about going there so why not get proposed to there?

"It's a day long flight," Jake explained. "We need two days for the flights, we'll spend 4 days there. What do you think?"

You squealed again and tightly hugged Jake, jumping into his arms. "Thank you thank you thank you!! You're the best boyfriend ever. When do we leave?"

"Friday."

You were so excited for the trip that Friday felt like it was in forever, but finally you were in the Maldives. The first night you guys slept almost immediately after getting there because you were so drained but the next day you guys were up bright and early, enjoying all that the Maldives have to offer.

Today was the last full day in the Maldives, and the two of you were enjoying some down time in your private hotel room pool. Jake glanced to check on you and saw you at the edge of the pool, furrowing your eyebrows while staring at your phone. He swam up to you and grabbed his beverage. "What's wrong baby?"

"My parents," you responded. "They're not responding! I know I have good service so I don't know why they're not answering."

Despite you not looking at Jake, he still looked away from you. He couldn't lie to you, and he knew that if he mad eye contact with you, he'd spoil everything about the proposal. "M-maybe they're just busy."

You shook your head as you tried dialing them again. "No.. it's like just past evening in my country right now, they're definitely home."

Jake knew he had to distract you before you somehow caught on. He just had to hide all of this from you for another couple hours; as tonight was the proposal.

From the minute he woke up this morning he felt like throwing up. Every single second he felt like regurgitating. You wouldn't say no right? Nah nah, you love him.. right?!

"Baby," he called out as he grabbed your phone gently from you. "It's okay, we'll check on your parents later. Maybe they tuned in early? Our parents aren't getting any younger you know."

You hummed. "Yeah yeah you're right... I'll call them first thing tomorrow morning."

Oh you definitely will.

Jake pulled you back into the middle of the pool and you guys spent more time in the pool until you felt your skin pruning. After you had come out of the shower you saw a couple of wrapped gifts laying on the bed. You looked to your boyfriend with a confused look and he just returned a smug smile.

"Open them," Jake commanded. "It's for our date tonight."

You headed to the bed and one by one opened the boxes. The first one had a beautiful pair of pencil heels covered in golden and silver sparkles. Next was a black leather handbag and the one after it had a diamond crystal heart necklace. The last box you opened had your jaw drop slack open. The dress in the box perfectly matched the shoes; it was pretty short in the front but the tulle in the back went all the way down to the floor and without wearing it, you could tell it would snatch your waist in such an alluring way. It was off the shoulder with a straight neckline and the short bit of sleeves there were drooped down to your elbows.

You caressed the sequins on the dress before turning to your boyfriend and jumping to hug him, not caring you were in just a robe. "Jake, I'm gonna cry! You're the best and this whole look is amazing! Thank you so so SO much!"

He rubbed your back as he held back a huge grin. "Anything for the love of my life." He kissed your forehead before letting you go. "Get dressed, I'm almost ready. We should head to the restaurant in an hour."

Jake had booked a reservation for the two of you at "The Cloud"; an Italian-Chinese sit down restaurant that had numerous 5-star reviews for not only the food but the fancy and romantic ambiance as well.

You two enjoyed your extremely romantic dinner; the food was tremendously good and you two just couldn't stop laughing and looking at each other with the utmost love you could hold in your eyes.

After the dinner Jake suggested a walk on the beach and you happily agreed, not wanting the night to end. You were walking hand in hand, you barefoot with your shoes in Jake's empty hands.

"Jake," you called out breaking the comforting silence.

"Yeah baby?"

You looked to him and kissed his cheek softly. "Thank you.. for everything. The last 4 days have felt so magical I just.. I can't even describe it. I really appreciate everything you've done for me, everything you've made me feel."

Jake's eyes softened as he looked at you, returning the kiss on the cheek. "Again, anything and everything for you baby. I'm just glad we're finally getting quality time alone."

You hummed. "Minji and you are good right? I didn't intend to break up a friendship."

Jake snapped his head towards you and gave you crazed look. "Baby, what are you talking about? You did nothing wrong! If my friendship with Minji would've ended it would've been because of her trying to break us up. You went through so much the last couple weeks and held everything in.. I'm so proud of you but I can't help but feel guilty because of it."

You took your free hand and caressed Jake's forearm with it. "Stop feeling guilty; you've done more than enough to make it up," you giggled.

Jake hesitated a little before biting his lip. "Well, does that mean you don't want the last surprise?"

You groaned. "Jake there's more? You've already done so much what could possibly–"

"Shh," he brought a finger up to your lip. "Let me do the talking right now." You both stopped walking and Jake let go of your hand. He placed your shoes on the sand and stood in front of you. "You trust me right Y/N?"

You vigorously nodded. "Of course Jake! With my whole life."

He gently kissed your lips before reaching into his pocket for a blue velvet box and got down on one knee making you gasp.

"Jake! I–"

"Baby," he whined. "I said let me do the talking." He waited for your nod to continue and did so with a sigh. "Okay look, truth be told I had a completely different speech prepared for this because.. actually I was planning to propose this December when we planned to go to Australia. I had this whole yacht lunch date planned and then an orchestra band and an after party.. but then the last couple weeks happened. And when you suggested we take a break, I.. I felt like my entire world collapsed."

Jake had tears threatening to fall out of his eyes as he looked up at you with so much love. "You are my entire world.. I couldn't ever imagine a life without you, and I don't think I could wait 3-4 more months to propose. This moment right here, this calm after the storm, it feels right. I want nothing more than to be with you forever. I– I can't promise that I'll always be a good husband even though I know you'll always be a good wife, and I'll apologize for that every single day that I'm alive, but I'm always going to do my very best to keep you happy. Nothing matters to me more than your happiness. Let me be the only man to make you happy forever Y/N. Please.. will you marry me?"

You didn't trust your voice as you could feel the sobs closing up your throat so you nodded, extending your left hand for Jake to slip the ring on; it fit perfectly.

He finally let the tears slip and came up from his position to hug you tight and you let him, wrapping your own arms around his form as you two sobbed. Jake kissed your head repeatedly. "Thank you baby, thank you for making me the happiest I've ever been."

You pulled back a little for the hug and kissed some of his tears away before kissing his plump lips. "I– I love you so much Jake I– thank you for everything."

Jake kissed you once again, murmuring an 'I love you too' as you two finished crying. He grabbed your shoes again and put his hand out to grab your now bejeweled one. "Shall we head back to our room, my fiancee?"

You couldn't help but break out into a smile at the new name. "Of course fiance... God I wish my mom was picking up my calls so I could tell her we're engaged..."

Jake laughed. "Your mom won't be picking up any calls for abouttt.. another 45 minutes," he reported checking his wristwatch.

You cocked your head at him. "Why? Is she not home?"

"She's on a plane.. to Korea.. your whole family is.. for the celebration party of our engagement. My parents are there by now too I think; Heeseung Hyung should've picked them up by now."

Your eyes widened. "What? You flew my parents out?!"

Jake eagerly nodded. "Yup! That's why we're heading back to Korea so early tomorrow morning; we have an engagement party tomorrow night with both of our families and closest friends. I got the guys to decorate it. They'll do fine right?"

You shook your head in disbelief at how this man could continuously sweep you off your feet. "Sim Jaeyun the man you are.. how many more times are you gonna woo me in this lifetime hmm?"

"Oh you have no idea baby."

[bambi-kinos]

There is something I noticed in this fandom, that's been bothering me for a while and I'd like to hear your opinion as well.

It seems like there is a tendency to gloss over John's streaks of aggression, violence and the obsession with sex. That post about anon asking if John was demisexual especially reminded me of that.

A lot of times I see untruth perpetuated that John only slapped Cynthia once and was so regretful of it, when there are so many accounts of him being violent with other women: hitting Thelma Pickles when she denied him sex, hitting a woman at Paul's birthday party after he grabbed her tit (same party where he hit Wooler), strangling May almost to death.

I think at the core people are trying to re-write John into someone he wasn't, and that's unfair to him and for the other people around him. He did make amends and become a better man, but that was way after Beatles ended. But at the core, John was aggressive and violent, just because he had soft side to him doesn't make him soft. He also knew how to manipulate people really well.

Also, I think his violence/agression is what actually attracted Paul to him because Paul liked danger. He liked when John behaved as a total prick, which made Paul pretty fucked up as well. But that's personally why I like their dynamic so much.

First of all, expecting demi-sexual John anon to take a pitstop in the middle of their fantheory, look at the camera, and say "did you know that John Lennon beat his wife?" like that dude from The Onion is not great.

Secondly, centering John Lennon's abuse of the women he came into contact with is doing a disservice to them. Cynthia, May, and Yoko are more than John's victims and they all have made it clear how they want their relationships with John to be remembered. They have their reasons for loving him and they communicated those. It's not asking much to respect that. They are all more than that and they should be remembered for other things besides "being John Lennon's victim."

Third, fans want to hang out in fan spaces doing fan stuff. Whether that's discussing musical technique or quoting a book or looking at song lyrics. Are we supposed to put legal clauses at the end of our posts and chat messages saying that we don't support John's DV and do not endorse blah blah blah blah blah?

Fourth, it's not an "untruth" that John regretted hitting Cynthia (and he did much worse than hit her, he grabbed her by her skull and slammed her headfirst into a set of exposed pipes) just because he kept being violent afterwards. This is the same guy that cried in public after he beat the shit out of Bob Wooler and kept saying "what have I done" because he thought he had killed someone. Smokers regret being addicted, that doesn't mean it's easy for them to quit smoking right on the spot.

John actively admitting what a massive fuck up he was is pretty much his only saving grace but it's also really important that he said that. Because wifebeaters don't typically do that, they just screech and shit and wail about how "it's my RIGHT as a MAN REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and refuse to accept blame for what they did. The fact that John did accept that blame says a lot about who he was as a person.

Fifth, fans aren't trying to "rewrite" John, we're trying to fit together the pieces of a complicated man who hurt a lot of people but also helped a lot of people.

And the thing is, I get it, I GET IT. I've seen insane shit go down before! I've seen people giggle and laugh about John beating women! I've seen fans say that John's violence is overblown and that fans are taking it too seriously, and every other horrible thing you can think of. All of this, and more, is present in Beatles fandom. So I get it! I understand that it's upsetting sometimes. I don't like it either. I piss on people who do that. I am still angry about that.

But how many fans are doing vs how many fans just aren't talking about the stuff you think is important?

We can fully acknowledge that John did many awful things and treat it seriously. We are also adults capable of nuance which means we can acknowledge and appreciate that softer side of him and be a fan of his art and public personality.

What else are we supposed to do. Genuinely.

(Thanks to @the-world-is-treating-me-bad for talking this out with me last week.)

[kitkatt0430]

hello :)) for the fandom ask game, 2, 4, 23 and 24 for Cisco please

2.) OT3?

Hmmm, for Cisco I've probably got a few OT3s.

There's Hartley/Cisco ~ Lisa and Kamilla/Cisco ~ Lisa, both of which having Lisa part of the relationship as more of a Queer Platonic Partner to both of them while the Cisco/Hartley or Cisco/Kamilla part of the relationship is intended as a romantic relationship.

Then there's Barriscowest. Truly a classic relationship right there, Cisco and Iris have so many parallels in their respective canon relationships with Barry that honestly it'd be weird if i didn't ship it.

Similar to Cisco/Kamilla ~ Lisa, I also like Cisco/Kamilla ~ Caitlin, though I haven't written this one yet. I just... don't like Cisco/Caitlin as a romantic ship because I love their platonic ship so much but as QPPs? Yes, that's lovely. ^_^ And I just want more reasons for Kamilla and Caitlin to spend time together. Cisco's girlfriend and bestie really should spend more time together...

And Barry/Cisco/Hartley - it's got some fun dynamics in there and I want nice things for all three guys so shipping them together? Makes giving them nice things so much easier.

4.) Is there a popular pairing you don't necessarily dislike but aren't too invested in?

Cisco/Cynthia. I thought they were cute in canon but my issues with her job got in the way of truly embracing the ship. The actors had great chemistry and I loved how adorable they were about each other on screen but... i don't think I've ever actually sought out any fics about this ship. I think if the show had actually acknowledged the ethical nightmare that was her job and had her choosing to leave it behind... I'd have one hundred percent loved the ship moving in that direction. Cisco supporting his girlfriend in recognizing the line of work she's in is actually really, really bad and choosing to do the right thing with regards to it? That would have been such an excellent arc for him and would have been a way better reason for him to be distracted throughout season 4 than... Breacher trying to poach him for a job.

It was just one of those ships were the baggage outweighed the cute and... it missed me entirely as a result.

23.) Has your favourite character/ship changed over time?

Well, Cisco's been my favorite character from day one and he still is now, so that part? Nope.

Ship wise... I think Hartmon is still my favorite because of how complex it can get based off their history and the weird friendship they seemed to have post timeline change in S2 and just how similar they are no matter how much they'd deny it. But I do have a lot of shift in which ships I like secondary to that OTP. Barrisco is pretty commonly up at the top though. I do enjoy Harrisco a lot as well, though that's a ship I can totally understand why some people hate it. (Barrisco though... who could hate Barrisco??? that is weird to me when I stumble across someone who doesn't like that ship...)

24.) What's your favourite thing about [character]?

What initially drew me to Cisco was his nerdy references and t-shirts. This was someone who just got me. Whose fandoms clearly overlapped significantly with mine. This was nerdy representation of people like me in a super hero show. I adored him on sight. And then he's just the kindest, most loyal person on the show. It takes a lot to make him truly angry and even then more often than not what is really making him so angry is feeling so let down by someone he loves.

He prioritizes platonic relationships pretty heavily too - much as I enjoy the Barrisco ship as romantic, being aro I love the ship as read as platonic too. There's so much amatonormativity in tv shows - and CW shows, oh wow CW is so awful about this - so for Cisco to be able to be so willing to tell his best friends how much he loves them is something I crave more of on my favorite shows. He's so confident about it too. They're his friends, of course he loves them and why shouldn't he say it?

[harrisongslimited]

George Chapter of the Day

I Saw Her Standing There #12

Chapter 12

Trigger Warnings: adult situations, swearing, drinking, smoking, sexual tension, slow-burn romance, george and joie romance, friendship.

**18+ only**

Chapter 12

When Joie awoke in the coach house, she was warm and comfortable. The sun was actually shining for a change and lit up the bright yellow walls and sunflower wallpaper. She missed daily sunshine. A lot. Sitting up in bed, she noticed a piece of paper pushed underneath the door and went to see what it was.

"Morning. I'm off to town. Make yourself at home for today. I'll talk to you when I get back. Probably sometime in the afternoon. George xx"

Joie folded the note, tucked it in her purse and headed for the main house. She was going to enjoy this day, even if she remained in George's robe.

"Joie?"

She heard the voice through the intercom from the front gate. "It's Cyn. Open up."

Joie met her at the front door. It was early afternoon and Joie had spent the rest of her morning talking to Freda and dozing on the living room sofa. She felt guilty not doing anything, especially when Freda told her how busy it was, but she felt she deserved this little vacation.

"Cyn!" Joie exclaimed when Cyn came through the gaden gate. "So happy to see you! What's going on?"

Cyn was loaded down with shopping bags and lunch. "Bringing you some clothes...and lunch. George told me you were here and all you had was a robe."

Cyn noticed it was George's robe and gave Joie "the look".

"Come on in...." Joie invited, "but don't get the wrong idea. I slept in the coach house."

Cyn walked in and dropped the bags. "Come on Joie...George is daft over you. You trying to stay one step out of his grasp?"

"No. Not at all...I mean not consciously."

Cyn frowned. "What does that mean?"

Joie shook her head and helped Cyn into the house, setting the bags and lunch on the kitchen table. "Don't know really...but what if I'm giving off the wrong signals?"

"Well, what signals do you want to give off?"

Joie smiled but turned shy. "I like him very much. I just don't have any experience...you know? I've had to fight boys off for the most part."

Cyn nodded in understanding. "John was the fist guy I ever dated. I was just so shy. He would tease me about everything and one thing led to another and I got pregnant. We married after that. So don't listen to me, really!"

They laughed together as Joie produced 2 glasses and Cyn filled them with a lovely smooth white wine.

"Be yourself, be open with George about your feelings. I know one thing--George would never hurt you."

Joie, filled with emotion, hugged Cyn. "Thank you, Cyn. You're a wonderful friend."

Cyn smiled. "Well let's have our wine and look through these clothes. We'll have you ready for George by the time he gets home."

Joie wondered what that meant, but just hugged Cyn again instead. "Thank you," she said simply. "Thank you for all you have done for me."

Cyn waved her hand. "Not to worry. My pleasure."

Joie looked in the bags. There were still tags on the clothes. Tags with prices she couldn't afford and Cynthia saw the look on her face.

"Don't worry about that for now. I know what you are thinking. But I had these in my closet. Never wore them. At least they will get some use. I bought them when I was skinnier and now I can't fit into them. Can't take them back either. So you are doing me a favor. I told John I will have more room in my closet!"

"Oh, I couldn't Cyn...." Joie told her, shaking her head.

"Please let me do this for you. I know how good you were to John on tour. He told me there were a couple of nights he'd had too much to drink and you really took care of him. I appreciate that....and I appreciate that I can trust you."

"You can, you know..." A flash of her hypocrisy exploded behind her eyes but Joie did her best to focus just on Cyn and what she needed.

Cynthia nodded and reached out to hold Joie's hand for a moment. "There are very few women I can trust at this point....and you are one of them."

Joie smiled. "Thanks, Cyn..."

"Now c'mon. Let's pick out some clothes."

.........

When George arrived back home, Joie was in the kitchen cooking. She thought she would give him a good home cooked meal and found enough food in the pantry to make a decent dinner. Chicken, rice and carrots. She had no idea if he liked chicken, rice and carrots, but that's what she made.

"Hello?" George called out. He had her suitcase in one hand and a box in the other.

"How....what....?'

"How....what?" George teased her. "I got you some things from Freda's with her help. And the box...well...I just thought this house needed something and I figured out what that was."

George handed her the box. Something inside moved. Joie jumped, then looked inside. There were 2 kittens...one white, one black.

"I didn't know what color to get....," he grinned.

"Oh my...."Joie exclaimed. She took the kittens out and held them to her. Joie looked at George, almost getting teary. "Oh my...." She said again, sweetly looking at him and leaning to kiss him.

It was quiet between them now as the kittens purred in her arms. Joie believed that right at that moment, right then, she'd never been happier in her life. She wanted to hold the moment in time, remembering the sounds, the smells, the feelings.

"You want to name them?" George finally asked her.

"I don't know..." Joie answered. "What do you think?"

"Let's just see what their personalities are like. Then we can decide."

He walked closer to her and she handed him the white kitten.

"One big happy family...." He joked. Those sensual dark eyes focused on her as she cuddled the kitten.

"One big happy family...." She answered.

..........

"So where were you?" John asked Cynthia when she returned home.

"At George's. Joie is there and needed some clothes."

"Needed clothes?" John laughed. "What the hell is wrong with George? What would she need clothes for?"

"He loves her, John..." Cyn told him seriously. "I think the little boy who followed us around has fallen in love."

"With Joie?"

"Yes with Joie" Cyn told him.

"Does she love him?"

Cynthia smiled. "She does. She just doesn't know it yet."

John shook his head. Walking away from her he said, "Birds....American or British. All the same."

..........

"What time are you leaving tomorrow?" Joie asked George as they cleaned dishes after dinner.

"Come here," George extended his hand. "I want to talk to you."

She took his hand as he led her to the living room where the kittens were asleep on a blanket, their little tummies full. George lit a fire, poured them a glass of wine, and sat next to her on the sofa.

"The car is picking me up at 6am," he began.

Joie shook her head. "6?"

George nodded. "And I'll be gone for 3 weeks."

She missed him already. The steadiness of him. The strength. The way he made her feel...like the only woman in the world he wanted next to him.

"What about the kittens?" Joie asked. "I couldn't take them to Freda's. What are we gonna do?"

"Well, I'd like you to stay here. You can take my car into London for now. We'll figure out what to do with your car when I get back. It's at Mal's now. He took it to be....cleaned up."

"Stay here?"

"Yes."

"George...."

"What?"

"I shouldn't."

"Why?" he asked, his eyebrow hiked up to the ceiling. "Because it doesn't look right?"

Joie shrugged slightly. "Well, it sort of ... doesn't."

George sighed. "Joie, I don't care how things 'look'. We know what we are doing and what happens is private. Let people think what they will. You can't stop them. I've learned that the hard way. If you don't want to stay, don't do it on your own terms. Not because of what people will think."

"I know you're right...."

"And if you are worried about your dad, I'll talk to him. I'll tell him you are staying in the coach house and I'm ... well, I'll be gone," he said. "And you can go into the office because Brian will be on the road with us.If you'd rather just stay here, that's fine. We will work the rest out when I get back."

"I quit NEMS, remember?" she asked, leaning closer to him. "Do you always know what to say and do?"

"Yes," he said in a joking way. "You're fine...work in the office if you'd like or stay here and help me. Staying here would help you get some proper time to work on your report. Don't forget that."

"Ok," she answered. "And don't worry...I'll tell my dad I'm here. Don't worry about that. But I'll have to call him long distance. Can I pay you for using the phone?"

"Joie," George began, shaking his head. "I don't care about that."

"But I do. I don't want to take advantage."

"You won't. I'm not worried about that...." he answered again, reinforcing his lack of caring about a phone call. "Let's say we'll figure it out later, ok?"

"Ok," Joie replied as her emotions began to overwhelm her. God, he was handsome. Those dark eyes pulled her in so effortlessly, like it was a walk in the park. She felt warmed by the fire. By the wine. By George. She wanted to crawl next to him and feel his arms around her. She wanted to sleep on his shoulder. When he got up to stoke the fire, she smelled the soapy clean of him.

Joie watched him for a moment. What was happening to her? Why was she feeling these things when she usually just didn't pay attention to such things?

The wine. She told herself. It was the wine talking. She would do no such thing but it did feel overwhelmingly incredible to imagine telling George the truth. Everything felt good.

They talked and shared another bottle of wine. Joie told him several times that he should get some sleep before the car came to get him at 6, but then they would start talking about something else and the time didn't seem to matter.

"Come with me," he said suddenly, standing and extending his hand. "Come with me."

She didn't know what he meant, but she didn't care. She took his hand. They both stood and George began lead her to his bedroom. Joie was nervous. She didn't know what to think.

"George...." she said, hesitantly.

"Keep me company while I pack a bag," he said quickly and Joie knew that George recognized her sudden nervousness.

"Ok..." she answered with a gentle smile.

He suddenly stopped and turned to her. "Nothing is going to happen unless you want it to, Joie. You have my word."

Joie looked at him in the light from the living room fireplace. His hand was wrapped around hers and her heart felt suddenly so light. Nothing else mattered. Nothing. Joie wanted to take him in her arms and kiss him, and feel his body pressed to hers.

She closed her eyes for a moment. "I know. I know that because of who you are."

He smiled and pulled her close to him. He kissed her lightly on the lips and they walked into his bedroom.

George proceeded to pack a bag as Joie laid down on his bed. She struggled to stay awake...to keep him company....but soon, her eyes closed. She wanted to get up so he could at least lay down to get some sleep, but she just couldn't open her eyes. At one point, she felt him lay down beside her but she couldn't move to get up. Within minutes, she was asleep.

Had she been awake, she would have felt him kiss her forehead again and whisper, "Sweet dreams, love."

..........

She awoke with a start and jumped up from the bed. The sun was up. She called out, "George?" but there was no answer. He was gone. Gone for 3 weeks.

Joie missed him already.

The strength of her feelings surprised her. Was this love? She had no idea. But she knew by the shiver that shot up her spine when George was close to her, something was going on. When he kissed her forehead, she felt butterflies in her stomach. This was all new to her. Charlie was the only person she could even relate this to, and he was a nightmare in comparison. He got very angry when she turned him down to have sex. He'd storm off and Joie found she really didn't care. Her first time was going to be with someone she loved, not some sex obsessed teenager. That she knew for sure.

Joie changed into her clothes and spent the day reorganizing the kitchen and running the kittens to the litter box. They were good company especially when they ran under her legs as she was trying to work. The phone rang about 6pm and Joie answered it.

"Hello?"

"Ah, you are still there," George said lightly. "I was afraid you had packed up and left for the States."

"Nah," Joie told him with a laugh. "The kittens need me."

"How are they?"

"Good. I'll get them to the vet before you get back. Is there anything you need me to do here?" Joie asked him.

"I'm having some things delivered day after tomorrow. If you could be there to let them in..."

"Sure. What's coming?"

"Some music equipment."

"Ok," Joie told him. "How was your flight?"

"It was fine. Tired though. Didn't sleep much last night."

"I know..." Joie answered sheepishly. "You must be exhausted."

"I'll be fine," he laughed. "And Joie, if you need me, call."

"I will. You too," she promised him.

And he hung up.

[nerdyvocals]

Far Away (and Breathing Cleaner Air)

Rating: Mature

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: F/F

Fandom: Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies (TV)

Relationship: Lydia/Cynthia Zdunowski

Characters: Cynthia Zdunowski, Lydia (Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies), Edward "Shy Guy" (Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies), Pedrito "Potato" (Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies), Nancy Nakagawa, Summer Stock Girl (Grease: Rise of the Pink Ladies)

Additional Tags: Post-Canon, Living Together, Suggestive Themes, Implied Sexual Content, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Protective Cynthia Zdunowski, Period Typical Attitudes, Internalized Homophobia, Underage Drinking, kinda???, Google says the drinking age in California in '57 was 21, and they're not quite there yet, Domesticity, The inherent homoeroticism of doing your girlfriend's hair, Betaed, featuring the beta reader's obscure drink knowledge, The T-Birds love Lydia, So do the Pink Ladies, La Traviata, Symbolism, so much symbolism, A single use of the fuck word, for Emphasis, if you know you know, Mild Language, Clyde reference Fanwritten season two project my beloved

Language: English

Series: ← Previous Work Part 2 of Like Phantom Limbs

Stats:

Published: 2023-07-31, Words: 16,024, Chapters: 1/1

Summary:

Words don't always mean what you might think. Home can be as simple as four walls where the world can't touch you. A family is a group of friends who love and support you as you are. Sometimes healing involves breaking further apart, even years later. And loving someone means helping them put those pieces back together.

(Title from Icarus by The Crane Wives)

Notes:

Massive, massive thank you to my dear friend who enabled my hubris and betaed this for me, @look-at-those-niceass-rocks on tumblr (if you follow me there, you'll recognize them from the unhinged quotes lists as we watched the series together). Highly recommend getting yourself a friend like them; I said I wanted more Crane Wives lyrics for titles and they went through each song line by line and wrote down what resonated with the themes I was working with. This being over 16k words is entirely their fault.

Enjoy!

Note: this is a direct sequel to Steady, Steady. While it is not strictly necessary to read that one first to understand this, there are some references and symbolism that might go over your head otherwise, specifically in regards to my characterization of Summer Stock Girl.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

The summer of 1957 promised to be a warm one. The sun hung heavy in the sky most days, unobstructed by clouds, casting a hazy heat over central California. Not the best weather to move house in, but honestly? Cynthia didn’t think there was anything that could wipe the smile from her face this week. The house itself was quaint. Much nicer than the apartment she grew up in, that’s for sure, but small for the number of people that would be living there. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms, and, for the most part, six girls. 

The plan had been Jane’s idea, proposed in Olivia’s bedroom at a Pink Ladies sleepover during Christmas break. One semester at Stanford under her belt, and she was already sick of the dorms. Ranting about her nightmare roommate eventually turned into daydreaming about the five of them living together, which over the next few weeks, turned into a solid plan. A little house in between Rydell and Stanford, somewhere they could all get used to independence without sacrificing getting to see their loved ones. A place she, Olivia, and Cynthia could live year-round, and a nest where Hazel and Nancy could land when school breaks brought them back west.

And with an odd number of girls in their group, it was only natural that Cynthia brought up Lydia. To make it even, of course. She endured the teasing and kissy faces with a thrown pillow and a promise to give each of them the same treatment when she inevitably caught their boys sneaking out in the mornings.

For all their teasing, they were all very encouraging about bringing Lydia into their midst. She had never formally joined their gang, but she’d never been excluded, and they had never treated her any different than the other partners, and for that, Cynthia was beyond grateful.

And so, now, six months after that conversation, two weeks after signing the lease, her girlfriend was moving into their shared bedroom, and her face hurt from the grin that had been plastered there since the night before. A tired sigh made her look up from the clothes she was hanging in the closet and she watched Lydia set a box atop a small pile.

“Last one!” she breathed out, exhausted, wiping a hand across her brow as she walked toward the foot of the bed. There, she turned on her heel, arms wide, to fall backward on the mattress.

Cynthia chuckled at the sight. She moved, almost unbidden, from her spot against the wall, crossing the room in quick easy strides to sit on the bed next to her girlfriend. She leaned over the other girl, arm propping her up on her other side as she pressed a kiss to the spot between the girl’s closed eyes. Lydia preened at the affection, and Cynthia felt her arm wrap around her waist, holding her in place.

“Having fun yet?” she asked, and Lydia laughed.

“After eight months of shitty dorm mattresses,” she replied, relaxing further into the plush duvet, “you have no idea how good it feels to lay in a real bed!”

Cynthia trailed the back of her finger along the slope of the other girl’s cheek, tracing a pattern only she could see. Lydia finally pried her eyes open and caught her gaze, a storm meeting the sea, and Cynthia moved her hand to cup the other side of her face.

“Our bed,” she whispered, reverently, as if she couldn’t believe it. Lydia’s smile broadened into a toothy grin.

“Our bed!” she agreed.

(Continue reading on ao3)

[kafus]

a quick roundup of some other stuff i've done in platinum because i stopped liveposting and was focused on playing lol

i defeated the grunts in the eterna city team galactic building and it wasn't difficult or anything but it was interesting to confront this part of the game again since it's been a while and i'm rusty

the galactic grunts obviously don't understand the extent of cyrus' plans to literally destroy and remake the universe, just that by doing all this evil shit they're supposedly going to find a new energy source with the power of pokemon evolution etc and make a better world that way. it's similar ish vibes to team plasma - a lot of them although misguided and stealing pokemon and generally being shitty seem to think that their boss genuinely has a bright vision for the future that they're helping serve... their headquarters literally has a poster on the wall telling them not to question what's happening and to just follow the path laid out for them. it kind of reads similar to real life cults instilling a fear of apocalypse in their followers - not quite that drastic since its pokemon, but who wants to be left out of a new, better world?

anyways team galactic analysis aside, jupiter was easy to defeat because pepper is cracked

it's interesting to me how much clefairy is idolized because it supposedly came from the moon in so many pokemon games? i didn't take pictures but the cycle shop guy here mentions that jupiter wanted the clefairy because the moon or space or whatever, and while that makes even more sense in this game because team galactic... space... matching themes... man clefairy is just everywhere lol there's been romanticism of space in pokemon since the very beginning in kanto (and that's not even mentioning you know, pokemon like deoxys and jirachi and whatever)

after this i backtracked and took care of a few things (like the old chateau which i just posted about)

i got the togepi egg from cynthia and hatched it. i love how in platinum cynthia just kind of appears throughout the story as this mysterious kind woman. i know she's remembered for her tough as nails champion fight and that sure as hell makes her memorable but i think it helps that she's around before that as well

i backtracked and got the captivate TM from this... random creepy woman in the woods?? what the fuck were they thinking putting this here. i forgot this was a thing until i was backtracking to check for cut trees now that i have access to cut post-fighting gardenia. Whyy JDFSKSFD

lastly i checked my honey trees since i've been playing for so long i had a few ready... i decided not to reset for female combee since i'm going to be playing this game a while, might as well try to let it naturally spawn before i SR for it. i also got a wurmple from another tree but i forgot to take a picture lol

anyways i'm probs gonna clear out the trainers on cycling road and catch some guys on the route below and then stop for tonight bc i have a doctor's appointment tomorrow

[antihibikase-archive]

8 (gonna say also headcanons!!), 15 & 16 for the aro ask game ^_^

HI MAIT thank you for the ask! x]

8. what are some of your favorite arospec characters? this can include characters from popular media or OCs.

I'M TRYING TO THINK OF CANON AROSPEC CHARACTERS BECAUSE <- BAD MEMORY SUPREME

But here are some I recall that I like/some that I heavily headcanon to be arospec!;

Judith from Tales of Vesperia

The DQIX protagonist <3

While I'm at it. Mark/Chelsea from Harvest Moon Island of Happiness + Sunshine Islands. If you play your cards right, you can matchmake everyone else in the island except for yourself + your protagonist's counterpart.

Tome Kurata from MP100

Alisa from Harvest Moon Island of Happiness/Sunshine Islands <- her TOTT incarnation is .. different but well. I still consider her aro <3

And speaking of TOTT- Eileen from HM TOTT!

Jughead from the original Archie comics

I think Michaela from Evillious Chronicles is aro, though she holds a deep love for Clarith, as much as she understands love in a human sense!

Snufkin from the Moomin series..

Speed round! Pokemon characters I consider arospec are; Colress, Emmet, Aurea Juniper, Fennel, Fantina, Jupiter, Cynthia, Valerie, Guzma, Plumeria, Raihan, Oleana.

15. what are some things you associate with arospec identities? i.e. frogs, arrows, white rings, anything the color green, etc.

THIS IS A FUN ONE SINCE. I GENUINELY DON'T KNOW. Much like how arospec experiences are varied and they tend to not be similar, thats .. how I see being arospec is KJSHAJKSAK so the thing I associate with them is the difference in experiences ..

Though I do associate them with the flag colors!

16. do you have any arospec OCs, if so tell us about them?

As for my arospec OCs;

Antihistamine/Anti, my little mascot! They're aro, but not ace!

By extension, Radish (my gym leader sona), since Radish and Anti share a spot of "this is literally my self-insert".

Anti's "uncle" Solmux/Sol, and their granpappy Paracetamol/Para!

Almond Starling, Apricot's twin!

Twins Beta Starling and Alpha Starling...

Koushi Yamamoto/Koko! One of the guys I took inspiration from when making Slater. They're the partner of Anti's sibling, Yanna!

Ryuto Katsuna (a pink-haired punk who evolved from an old AU version of a canon character; he also has a qpr!)

The Blur/Blight incarnations of the Pokemon characters mentioned above, particularly Nikolai Colress, Emmet Graystone, Audrea Juniper, and Fennel Dreamer!

I WILL DEFINITELY SHARE MORE ART/PICTURES OF THEIR MII SELVES IN THE COMING DAYS but <3 Here's Anti, Sol and Para, Radish, Almond (ourple girly next to Apricot), Beta, Alpha, Ryuto, and Nikolai!

[waheelawhisperer]

Top 5 designs from your formative years that defined your tastes

Bearing in mind that my formative years include a range that spans from "the moment I was old enough to understand concepts more complex than hunger and crying" to "the moment I started writing this post" and that a lot of designs have influenced my tastes over the years, here you go:

Goku and Vegeta, Dragon Ball Z

As a Latino I am quite literally obligated by law to put Goku and Vegeta on this list, but I was also huge into Dragon Ball Z as a kid and I actually think that show is what awakened the love of martial arts within me that still persists today. Toriyama's aesthetic is incredibly distinctive and had a great deal of influence over my initial forays into art and character design when I was much younger. These guys end up at #1 because DBZ has done so, so much to build my perception of combat and fight scenes and scale and and just sort of how a series should work that, like... I can't imagine myself getting into anime at all if I hadn't watched this show. Given how much of my taste is drawn from anime (although there's quite a bit coming from western media as well), my personal preferences would've taken a much different trajectory in that scenario.

Jotaro Kujo, Jojo's Bizarre Adventure

I don't think any character has influenced my tastes in the modern era more than Jotaro, to be honest. He's one of the reasons many of my characters wear a hat/long coat combo and why the men in particular tend to be tall, buff, and stoic and have deep voices. He also influenced my appreciation of cool poses and characters that just beat the shit out of people with their mighty fists, as well as intelligent and analytical heroes at a time when I was used to seeing heroes just be stronger or grittier or more determined than their foes.

Samus Aran, Metroid/Super Smash Bros.

I'm pretty sure that Zero Suit Samus was the start of my irresistible desire for tall badass blonde ladies with big boobs. I have a type because of her. Let's just leave it at that.

Charizard, Pokemon

I think dragons are super cool and Charizard is a big part of why. Kid me loved Pokemon, a love which extended into adulthood, and Charizard was my favorite for a very long time. I'm pretty sure he's also where my fascination with fire powers came from. Also, the narratives around Ash's Charizard's fights in the anime did a lot to shape my perception of storytelling in combat.

The Good Hunter, Bloodborne

The other reason a lot of my characters have hats and long coats and are very gruff and stoic. Bloodborne is arguably my favorite game I've ever played and had a huge influence on my tastes and aesthetic. I particularly loved the Gothic Horror aspects of it (never been as big on Cosmic Horror tbh) and it really reignited my love for big brutal weapons that just fuck enemies up. It's also the reason the ocean is fucked up and awful in many of my original settings.

Honorable Mentions:

So fucking many not gonna lie but I'll just list a few. Funnily enough, a lot of my western influences actually come from books more so than TV/movies.

Jackie Chan - DBZ started my love for martial arts, but watching a bunch of Jackie Chan movies when I was younger grounded that aspect of my taste in something a bit more realistic than aliens who could fly throwing around energy blasts and leveling mountain ranges.

Godzilla - This is how I learned I love watching giant monsters fight. Monsterverse Godzilla has had a lot of influence on my tastes recently because I love the way he fights and the way the people making the Monsterverse movies drew from real fights between animals to build his fighting style.

I had a huge crush on Cynthia Pokemon as a kid but I had to pick between her and Samus and Samus won by virtue of timing.

Brutaka from Bionicle is cool as shit.

Yang Xiao Long from RWBY and Nearl from Arknights did not build my tastes so much as reinforce them. Hard.

Arknights in general has been one of the big influences on my original work not gonna lie.

MCU's Iron Man, Halo's Master Chief, and the Marines from StarCraft all helped codify my ideas of what powered armor should look like.

Esdeath from Akame ga Kill heavily reinforced my desire to be femdommed despite most of the rest of that series being steaming dogshit

King Arthur - I read so voraciously and from such an early age that my family couldn't keep age-appropriate books stocked faster than I could read them, so at some point my dad said "fuck it" and handed a collection of Arthurian Cycle stories written for adults to an eight-year-old and I have loved chivalric romance and knights in shining armor ever since.

There's so much more but I don't think I can possibly list them all

Thanks for sending me this. Everyone please ask more, I had a lot of fun answering the ones I've gotten so far

[bee0bee]

Game of Chance part 9

11. 10. 1977.

A few days later, Sandra found out where to find this particular Hunter. Cynthia's best friend, Erica, seemed to be the only one who knew about the guy. Se found him in a dormitory that looked quite messy. Like Erica said. The guy was about to go somewhere when Sandra stopped him. - Hunter Sinclair? - Y-yeah. - I'm Sandra. Cynthia's sister. - Sandra introduced herself. -Look, I had nothing to do with what happened to her. - Hunter said immediately and continued his way. - I'm here because…I want to know more. Maybe you could help. Her killer is still at large. - I don't know anything, so…I have to go now. - We could talk over a coffee. I just want to ask a few questions. - Sandra offered. - Look, I don't know what you believe or what you want to know, but I loved her. Her death…also affected me and I want to move on. I think you should do the same. You'll unlikely find the killer if even the police haven't. - I read Cynthia's diary, which raised a lot of questions. It seems my sister had secrets. It would help me to move forward if I knew… Finally, Hunter and Sandra got into a cafe to talk. - What do you want to know? - She tore out a bunch of pages, but all that was left of one of the notes was that you had protected her from someone. Who was that? Was there someone who wanted to hurt her? - Um…there was a guy who molested her. An acquaintance. She didn't tell much about it, but once I witnessed what was happening and intervened. He tried to force Cynthia into his car. - Who was that? Did you see him? - No, not really. It was getting dark and he was wearing a black sweater and a baseball cap. - Cynthia also mentioned that you have a criminal record. It can't be someone from your past… - No, I left the past in Miami. - I understand. Well, thanks, Hunter. Here's my phone number if…something comes to your mind. She returned home with new information. Kazuhiro didn't know what Sandra was up to,he probably wouldn't have been happy, so Sandra tried to keep her action a secret.

[nastasyafilippovnas]

100% everything you said. I don’t hate her with Paul because he does care about her enough to want to protect her, and there is a level on which he understands her which is rare for Georgia. But yeah, no chemistry. The dumbest thing she ever did-not necessarily the worst, but the dumbest-was kill Tom. I understand the thought process. “My hands are already dirty so I might as well help this family.” But damn woman think of yourself once in a while.

I do hate her with Paul lol. No, seriously, I get what you mean about him caring about her, but, idk. I feel like, with Paul, Georgia is always waiting for something that will make him leave, because they are so different and he doesn't really understand everything she had to do. I also feel like she only loves Paul because he is "a good guy" and she hasn't met many of those. I mean, Kenny and Gil are total pieces of trash. Zion is nice, but ultimately he left when she needed him the most. So, in comparision, Paul is her prince charming. But does she love him? Really love him? I don't know.

And, ofc, I know I'm biased because I'm very much Team Joe, but it just feels like they have a more special connection. And imo Georgia never went there besides some flirting because it scares her, hoe good it could be and how she could f-cked it up.

I guess we will see where the show takes us with them on s03 (if there's a s03!). I hope Georgia doesn't spend the whole season in prison. I agree it was a very dumb move. She likes Cynthia, so she kills her dying husband, lol. Please, Georgia, you're not a cat, that's not a acceptable gift!

[scurvgirl]

I posted 646 times in 2022

That's 119 more posts than 2021!

234 posts created (36%)

412 posts reblogged (64%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@background-palindrome

@lillotte17

@first-flower-of-my-house

@fashion-runways

@jackalopedread

I tagged 581 of my posts in 2022

Only 10% of my posts had no tags

#scurvysays - 139 posts

#fan art - 126 posts

#dragon age - 125 posts

#critical role - 118 posts

#solas - 64 posts

#fashion - 60 posts

#gorgeous art - 57 posts

#scurv talks cr - 49 posts

#lavellan - 47 posts

#solavellan - 43 posts

Longest Tag: 125 characters

#you as as an adult have already acquired language and thus your brain has created efficient neueal networks for that language

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Essek: *takes weeks and months to research possible local cat pairs will produce a kitten that will suit Caleb*

Caleb: *walking through Rexxentrum one day* *reaches down to what looks like a mud pile and pulls out a hissy kitten* This one. *tucks the still hissing kitten into his coat*

Essek: But it is filthy.

Caleb: Exactly. No one was paying attention to him, but I saw him.

300 notes - Posted October 16, 2022

#4

[A sending stone vibrates, a hand meaning to deactivate it accidentally activates it instead.]

Beau: Hey, Hey Caleb. Yasha's got this new green bean casserole recipe she wants to try. Can we have some of your green beans?

Caleb, audibly breathing heavily: ah, Beauregard, I'm, uh, a bit busy at the moment. [More heavy breathing]

[A pause]

Beau: IS IT ESSEK?? HEY ESSEK!

Yasha, softer than Beau from present: What if it's not Essek, that would be awkward.

Caleb, still breathing heavily: Ladies, please, now-

Beau: Of course it's Essek, who else could it be?

Yasha: I don't know. Caleb is a handsome guy, maybe...

Beau: Nah, it has to be-

[Essek rises and leans over to the sending stone]

Essek: Caleb and I are currently indisposed, we will message you back later about the green beans.

[A brief cheer is heard before a Silence spell is cast on the stone]

Caleb, reaching for Essek: Now, where were we?

[In Zadash]

Beau: I fuckin' KNEW it!

Yasha: You're so smart, babe.

378 notes - Posted December 3, 2022

#3

I love Ashton and Imogen’s dynamic. Friends who deeply understand the wanting to be around other people but other people hurt so so much. For Ashton the pain is physical, for Imogen it’s mental. 

390 notes - Posted September 24, 2022

#2

Ashton: I’m fuckin’ raging!

Also Ashton:

784 notes - Posted April 23, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I haven’t seen this on my dash so here it is. The U.S. House of Representatives passed a bill codifying same-sex marriage and it is now going to the Senate where there really is an actual chance of it passing. Sure, there are assholes who won’t support it, but there are Republican senators willing to support it and we need their support to get this passed. If you live in a state with a Republican senator, please call the senate office telling them that as a constituent, you support same-sex marriage and the Respect for Marriage Act.

The following senators are reported to be undecided, if one of these senators is yours, CALL!!!

Richard Burr, North Carolina

Roy Blunt, Missouri

Mike Braun, Indiana

Joni Ernst, Iowa

Cynthia Lummis, Wyoming

Rand Paul, Kentucky

Mitch McConnell?, Kentucky (yeah, I’m shocked the evil undead gizzard demon is in the undecided category as well but...might as well pressure the fucker)

Mitt Romney, Utah 

Mike Rounds, South Dakota (specifically Mr. Rounds is quoted as acknowledging difference between a religious marriage and a legal one, go ahead and specify that you support granting couples the legal rights and protections that are given with a legal marriage)

Rick Scott, Florida 

Dan Sullivan, Alaska (notably, Mr. Sullivan is quoted to recognize and respect the existing Supreme Court ruling on same-sex marriage! Pressure this man!!)

John Thune, South Dakota

Patt Toomey, Pennsylvania

Tommy Tuberville, Alabama

Todd Young, Indiana

This information was gathered from CNN on 7/21/22.

For clarification: Same-sex marriage is legal in all 50 states right now based on the 2015 Supreme Court ruling. But, with the court standing as it is and with Roe being taken down, codifying same-sex marriage in law would mean that the Supreme Court would have a much, MUCH harder time stripping away the right. This is important. Marriage as a legal binding is critical to allowing spouses to visit each other in the hospital, make medical decisions, share assets, adopt and form families, and more. We need TEN Republicans to support the bill, so far there are FIVE likely supporters - we need AT LEAST FIVE MORE.

Please reblog this!!!

35,681 notes - Posted July 21, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[william-t-sickofyourshit]

Othello and Isa sat down with everyone in the living room, and listened to how William and Sebastian explained everything. Wow. That was some crazy situation. Othello just said hello and all hell broke loose. He needed to cool down. And it seemed like Albert understood that too, because he quickly brought two cups of hot chocolate with marshmellows for both Isa and her boyfriend. And then... well, in this lovely family atmosphere, they continued this crazy reveal.

Cynthia seemed very shocked and concerned, but Albert was very understanding and calm, which was much needed. But Sebastian still got a little heated about it, telling his mom that they didn't tell the truth because they feared exactly that kind of reaction. William squeezed his hand reassuringly then. He didn't want Sebastian to argue with his parents because of him. "It's okay, love. Your parents are rightfully upset. We need to give them time." William said, then rubbed his boyfriend's knee affectionately.

But gosh, Sebastian then basically panicked and started begging Othello not to say anything. Not to tell anyone. Othello got taken aback by how intense Sebastian was, and it dawned on him that... yeah, he was officially the first and only person in St Michael's to know about the priest's secret. It was quite a big deal. Othello looked around at everyone's faces, then at Isa. It was so obvious to him, that he was surprised Sebastian even had to ask.

"I... guys, it's not my secret to tell. Don't worry." Othello reassured, giving both Sebastian and William a soft smile. "I mean... yeah it's crazy." He added with a chuckle, attempting to make the situation less tense. "But exactly because this is so crazy I know you need to decide when is the right time for you to... deal with this. So... don't worry. I won't tell anyone."

William looked at Othello and it was clear how relieved and grateful he was. Then, he shifted his attention towards Sebastian's parents once more. He felt... guilty, for letting down their trust.

"Mrs and Mr Michaelis... I need you to know that I am serious about your son. I would never lead him on, I would never hurt him. It's just... a little more complicated..."

For I have sinned...

The principal cleared his throat, eyes scanning the notes that he had wrote down before this meeting. It already lasted an hour, and the teachers gathered in the faculty room were becoming restless and bored. But indeed there were some things to discuss, with the concert that the senior class was supposed to perform at the end of the semester, and with recent staff changes. 

William glanced down at his watch, sighing softly. His class was starting in 15 minutes, so at least, whether the meeting will be done soon or not, he will get to excuse himself. He looked out of the window, his mind wandering. Principal’s voice turned into white noise in the background. It was a pleasant day, late summer. But William was looking forward to a slightly cooler weather. Wearing all black could really be bothersome at times. 

“And lastly, I am pleased to announce that we have finally found replacement for the violin teacher. Dear Mr Tanaka, may he rest in peace, was with us for so many years that I’ve been concerned we won’t be able to find someone as good as to fill this position.” the principal spoke. “But Mr… Michaelis, was highly recommended to me, and he indeed has impressive references. He will be starting this week, so please welcome him warmly once he will arrive. Ah yes… about that. He will arrive today at noon, I need someone to pick him up from the train station and bring over for the tour around the school. Any volunteers?” 

William was barely listening, and definitely not paying much attention. He glanced at his watch again, and saw that it was time to leave, as his class was about to start. He raised his hand to excuse himself, and little did he know, he just volunteered.

“Father William! Excellent!” the principal exclaimed. “Just don’t be late, the train arrives at noon.”

“Train…?” William questioned, raising his brow. He had a feeling he was missing something…

***

Right after the meeting, William had to run for the class, so he had little time to clarify what exactly he had volunteered for. He was a piano teacher in this Music Academy, but also he served as a priest in local church. Well respected, and rather liked. So when he later found out it was about the new violin teacher, he didn’t refuse. Who, other than himself, would be a better choice to introduce a newcome to their community?

So even though he raised his hand by accident, he accepted this fate.

After classes, at noon, William took a taxi and drove to the train station, to pick up their new teacher. Wearing black trousers, and a black shirt with a thin tie, was absolutely dreadful in this weather, so William quickly found shelter under the roof of the station platform, that provided some shade.

The train had just arrived. William had no idea how Mr Michaelis looked like, but he figured he will just look for someone carrying a violin case with them. 

He was in for a bit surprise.

@crazyvik97

[1358456]

(More) NG+ Banters

Cynthia: "Jirachi? A Pokemon that can grant wishes? I've never heard of that one." Red: "I'm not surprised. Apparently that thing is asleep for a 1000 years at a time. But it wakes up in a couple of years. In my timeline, me and my friends were turned into stone so our juniors used a wish to save us." Cynthia: "... Wow." Sabrina: "... Still not lying." Red: "I used the wishes in the last timeline, so we're going to do that again this time. But first, we need to go to Hoenn. Find the HQs of Team Aqua and Magma, and find Archie and Maxie so I can stick my foot up their asses. And hopefully that'll prevent a giant water monster from spawning in Hoenn... twice!" Cynthia: "... I won't ask."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Red: "Huh. A wild Salamence? That's pretty uncommon. ... Uh oh. Is this that Salamence incident that I heard about? But surely two 5 year old kids would run and not-" Ruby: "Oh, you want a piece of me?! Bring it on! I'll take you!" Red: "... That is one crazy ass kid. ... Though I did pick a fight with Mew when I was 11, and that's not any better. ... I better go save them..."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Erika: "I must ask, why did you volunteer to accompany that boy on his journey? ... Is it just out of gratitude for how you are valued over in Team Rocket?" Sabrina: "You mean Red? Well... I am grateful. It's certainly better than being shunned by the public and hiding and running all the time. But I want to follow Red around from time to time because of his memories. You wouldn't know from just looking at him or listening to him, but he's hiding a tremendous amount of loneliness and sadness. So I want to accompany him and alleviate some of that." Erika: "I see... I can understand that." Sabrina: "And when the time comes and he goes back to his own timeline... there will be someone who'll need our company far more." Erika: "That is quite kind of you." Sabrina: "Also, you would not believe some of the things he went through or heard about. I would like to see some of those for myself." Erika: "That... is also understandable. It will be quite the interesting journey."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Erika: "Why are you investing so much money on this brand new talent agency?" Red: "Uh..." Erika: "Surely you have no interest in such a thing?" Red: "Sure don't. But I kind of know the president of this company in a different timeline. So I just want to help her out a bit." Erika: "Understandable." Red: "... And maybe now I'll find out just what the hell "BW" stands for..."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Red: 'Huh. This kid looks like Black... oh.' Black: "Oh! You're him!" Red: "Uh... huh?" Black: "You're the guy who steamrolled through the Pokemon League at the age of 11!" Red: "Uh... yeah, I guess." Black: "I want to be just like you! Please, let me train under you!" Red: 'This is probably not fine? I highly doubt he'll get to meet and befriend White if I let him follow me around...' "Sorry, kiddo. But I'm not very good at training other people." Black: "But... you trained the Sinnoh League champion!" Red: "How the hell did you- uh... never mind." 'Sabrina, help!' Sabrina: <You're on your own. Just enjoy this reunion. Give the kid a few tips or something.>

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sabrina: "... You love him, don't you?" Cynthia: "!!!" Sabrina: "Doesn't take a telepath to see that." Cynthia: "..." Erika: "Even I was aware of it. However, given the circumstances..." Cynthia: "... I know. ... It's not going to work. I can only hope that he doesn't know." Sabrina: "He does though. He's just pretending to not have noticed. His heart belongs to another, and has for over 40 years at this point. He's been aware of your feelings for him since the last timeline, which is partly why he feels so guilty inside. Your help is essential for him to return home, but he doesn't want to hurt your feelings when he leaves you behind. And he doesn't know what he can do to change that." Cynthia: "I realize that I can't make him love me back. The only solution would be if I stop loving him, but... I can't control that. I don't want him to go back to his own timeline, but he wants to. He won't love me as I love him, but he's still my childhood friend. If he needs my help, I will help him. Even if it breaks my heart to do so..." Erika: "You are so strong, Cynthia. I know this is very tough for you. But we are here whenever you need assistance." Sabrina: "And you still have time to figure this out. Best of luck." Cynthia: "... Thank you..." 'There's no way... Even if I somehow get myself to stop loving him... he's still my only childhood friend and he will leave me behind. There's only misery waiting for me, regardless of what I do...' Sabrina: "..."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Erika: "We have been through so many regions together, even though Sabrina and I have not accompanied you through your whole journey so far. So I must ask. Why do you not stop the evil organizations that you know about ahead of time?" Red: "I did stop some, but there are simply too many and too spread out. I already beat the crap out of Archie and Maxie. I do have to go to Sinnoh at some point and stick my foot up Cyrus's ass. But then to stop all the evil, I'll have to go to Unova next and stick my foot up the cult leader's ass over there. And then I'll have to go to Kalos and find whatever his name was and kick his ass. And then I'll have to go to Alola and... I don't even know whose ass I have to kick over there. And then there's that mess in Galar or something?" Erika: "... Though crudely stated, I do see your point." Red: "Yeah. Simply put, there are too many asses to kick, and not enough time. So for those, I'll have to let my juniors handle them."