#you don't have to ship them yourself to acknowledge that they're a thing and that matters; and discuss it

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

there are a lot of reasons i'm really, really impressed by how well sdmi portrayed the dynamic of an abusive relationship with pericles and ricky, and one of the big ones is how accurately they show what it looks like when abuse starts to escalate.

the extent of that is yet another thing that'll take a longpost of its own to go into, because it spans like.... the entire arc of their relationship in the show. but one thing that stands out to me in particular is their portrayal of the massive red flag that is a partner trotting out bigoted behavior against a group you're in. especially insults, and especially directed right at you.

this show has a LOT of fatphobia, jesus christ does it ever, and there are certainly some fatphobic tropes going on with ricky; but i've always been surprised and impressed by how many of the nastier ones they avoided, especially considering his role in the story and what his arc is about.

he is a major, nuanced character whose trauma is treated with full weight and sincerity. it's implied that his body type changed the way it did due to the trauma he went through when he was younger, and the ensuing mental illness, which is a pretty realistic experience for a lot of people. the things that happen to him are played for full tragedy and horror, when it would have been so, so easy for them to make light of it because Tee Hee Fat Guy and Tee Hee Male Abuse Victims Funnee. despite how his whole thing involves corporate greed, they don't go the route of portraying him as Gluttonous and Hedonistic; if anything he is very obviously not using all that money for even basic physical self-care, and the only time we ever see him eating anything it's when he's drinking wine grape juice with pericles. which, like, there's issues to be unpacked with that too, but jesus christ it's an improvement over what usually happens with characters like him.

he's a fat queer man who isn't degendered or made feminine in a mocking and/or predatory way. (there's nothing wrong with feminine fat queer men and they need more non-shitty rep, please and thank you god, but there is a lot of nastiness in the tropes they're often used for in mainstream media, and one of those tropes is when people consider 'fat queer man' and 'masc' to be oxymorons.) no one ever once calls him ugly; if anything multiple people in his life think he's attractive and desirable, for better or for worse. no one body-shames him. and no one ever mentions his weight.

except pericles.

'The Horrible Herd' and 'The Devouring' are two halves of a whole here, re: escalation of abuse. 'Devouring' is when the abuser goes full mask off and shit hits the fan; 'Horrible Herd' is the wind-up before the punch. HH is when ricky realizes things are getting Bad and he needs to put a stop to this now, and Devouring shows what happens when he tries, because by the point where it's gotten bad enough to give him a wakeup call it's already too late. it's how abusive relationships tend to go, and it's chillingly accurate.

and what's one of the things pericles says during Horrible Herd when that punch is winding up? something no one's ever said before now, including him? 'you pudding-faced dummkopf.'

he body-shames him. he insults his weight, and that's a major turning point. bigotry is something that's often there to some degree from the start, but not always, because some abusers are good at hiding things like that until they're confident they've got you where they want you. the message with ricky and pericles is loud and clear: when this happens, the walls are dripping blood. get out.

(if you can. and be careful when you try.)

when this show is good, it is really, truly good. god damn.

[elexuscal]

the longer i stay in fandom, the longer i think a huge amount of bad takes and discourse come from an... abundance of identifying with a character

to be clear, i don't think it's bad to identify with a character. far from it! i think that's part of what makes fiction so powerful.

and it's only logical people often attach to a blorbo because they're just like me, for real. a person will see some element of themselves-- their race, their gender, their sexuality, their hobbies, their family life, their specific flavour of neurodivergence-- and something just resonates. it gives them a way to explore and name this important part of themselves, a part they maybe didn't even know existed before it.

and everything is well and good until some split between them and the character shows up

because of course, no character, except an explicit self-insert written by yourself, will ever be a perfect 1:1 for your own experiences. so sooner or later-- maybe in canon, maybe in a fanwork-- your blorbo diverges from your lived experience in a huge way.

I think this is why shipping culture in particular gets so toxic. While it is by no means the only way to indulge with shipping, a significant portion is 'if i was in that character's shoes, i would choose X'. the fight becomes for your own self-identity.

but this gets expanded in other ways. a character who is revealed to be black when the majority of the fandom had just assumed they were white. or revealed to be queer, or maybe the 'wrong' flavour of queer. or fuck, even some more innocuous part of their backstory, one that's nonetheless so meaningful for SOMEONE, but now it feels like the story is saying, fuck you, we're doing something else

i don't know. i just feel acknowledging this perceived-attack-on-identity helps me understand why people react it what seems to be such outsized way to canon and fanworks alike.

at the same time, i think it's a really important thing to check in yourself.

it's nice, to see a character who you identify with. who resonates with for being like you. but it's also nice to acknowledge and appreciate the way characters are not like you at All. how great it is to get insight into this totally different lived experience. and to muse on how wonderful that recognition might be for someone who does have that background.

[spicybylerpolls]

It's a shame how guarded the fandom is regarding sex. First and foremost because sex, and specifically shame around sex, is heavily, heavily tied to Mike and Will's story.

If Lucas can have a 69 sign above his head while he's sleeping, why is it so hard to believe Mike and Will are having sexual dreams about each other? Especially if you ship them and acknowledge the 69 sign was obviously signaling a sexual dream?

If Lucas can have a reference to dirty magazines under his bed, why is it so hard to believe Mike and Will also have dirty magazines hidden around their bedroom?

If Dustin can have a reference to masturbation, why is it so hard to believe Mike and Will are also interested in masturbation as well?

They specifically put these references in the other, ORIGINAL, party members, who are the same age as Mike and Will, while also including references for them too (that people just can't accept), signaling all these boys are starting to think about sex. The difference is, Lucas and Dustin don't have any shame surrounding who they're attracted to.

I don't know about you (however I imagine this is a common experience for many queer people) but before I accepted that I was attracted to the same sex, I'd constantly find myself watching the women in porn and consciously trying to focus on the man. I'd tell myself things like "oh - you're just interested in how your body will look when you're older" or "oh - it's normal when you watch porn" etc - basically anything to reaffirm that I wasn't gay. And this is all between ages 13-16.

This is exactly how I see Mike, specifically. Starting to notice his attraction to men but consciously repressing it, telling himself he's normal and it doesn't mean anything. And I think people forget (or maybe just feel uncomfortable talking about) this part - that the sexual attraction, the shame in the sexual attraction, is a huge, huge part of realizing you're queer and coming-of-age as a queer person.

And that's why Mike doesn't want to hug Will at the airport (or a big part of it). It feels awkward, even if he doesn't know why. It feels awkward because he feels ashamed for liking Will. I mean the first shot we get of Mike setting eyes on Will in Season 4 is of him looking at Will's chest and then quickly averting his eyes. This tells us everything we need to know - Mike is attracted to Will, feels ashamed about it and doesn't want anyone to know (or likely doesn't even fully understand it himself, but at the very least, knows it's not "right").

Point being, his shame surrounding specifically his sexual attraction to men is one of his biggest issues and failing to talk about it is a HUGE DISSERVICE to his character!

It also does a huge disservice to Will's character, too. The repercussions of this shame, a lot of the time, is Will's situation - not having your first kiss, all of your friends growing up before you, hating yourself because you have a crush on your best friend. All because he's romantically AND sexually attracted to men. This is what Will's thinking. If he wasn't such a freak, if he didn't want to kiss boys, if he wasn't starting to feel sexually attracted to men, then everything would be so much easier. He wouldn't feel like such a mistake.

This is why I think they'll absolutely have a sex scene in S5 and also why I think it will be explicit. I previously thought it'd likely be implied and that that'd be enough but I don't see it the same anymore. Now, I don't think this means it has to be racy, obviously, but just that the audience would see some of it. Quite frankly, doing an implied sex scene, while I wouldn't be dissatisfied, is a disservice to the story.

See, with Jancy, the implied sex scene works. The tension between these two characters has been building for a season and a half and we know they want to have sex. We don't have to see it, we just need to know that they do.

But with Mike and Will? That's not the case at all.

First of all, the tension has been building for 5 seasons, which is the entire series. An implied sex scene would ultimately be a tame ending to this storyline.

Second, Mike and Will specifically feel shame about this act, Jonathan and Nancy don't. We don't need to see their reaction but we need to see Mike and Will's reactions because it completes their characters. Because they have felt shame about this specific thing, not showing them feeling comfortable doing this, with each other, would be incomplete.

Third, think about Steve and Nancy's sex scene - we're shown it specifically because Nancy feels uncomfortable.

Ultimately, there's no need to show Jonathan and Nancy having sex because there's nothing left unresolved. That's what the Duffers actually get right - only showing a sex scene when it's important for the narrative and for the characters. Even Hopper and Joyce point to this, despite them being the oldest characters and the most suitable to have an explicit sex scene, opposed to Steve and Nancy. That's because there's nothing else to tell us about Joyce and Hopper through this sex scene - we know they love each other. I don't see why the Duffers would break this pattern now.

And well, even if you don't want the scene, I don't see how you could argue that the moment Mike and Will decide to have sex isn't extremely important for their characters and would tell us A LOT about how they both feel, especially Mike seeing as we don't get his perspective.

You could argue the kiss would suffice but... does it? A kiss isn't really... sexual. And Romantic, sure. But this wouldn't address the shame they specifically feel about sex. Mike starting to cry while having sex with Will tells us so much more about his character than him crying while kissing Will.

Kissing is also a thing children do. Ending a 5 season, 9 year long coming-of-age project, with two characters who have fought inter-dimensional monsters that quite literally represent their shame, simply kissing? Something we've already seen one of these characters do, multiple, multiple times?

Okay, I guess.

Anyway, I know a lot of these points have already been made, and that this was really long, but I just wanted to say them again because it upsets me so much, especially during rewatch when I see all the themes right in front of me. And I know it upsets other people, other young adults, too. Seeing this experience represented so accurately - one that you might even still feel shame about, one that you went through not too long ago - and not even being able to discuss it openly in the fandom, is sad. Being called a freak or a pedophile for simply suggesting that sex is important here and the Duffers are telling us so. Sex... the thing that literally created us all. And that almost everyone starts thinking about between the ages of 13-14.

Sigh. At least we have this blog. Thank you for that. 🫶🏼

[charmac]

just wanna say I agree wholeheartedly with your tags on that fandom post. I have been following sunny on here since 2015 and there is a constant cycle of sensitive, and frankly delusional people, who claim the show, make crazy headcanons and justifications to make it tolerable and acceptable to them before they eventually shun and condemn the show altogether. it was very bad in 2018 and made me withdraw from the fandom lmao. I remember being most annoyed with the endless woobifying of charlie and the absolute condemnation of dee above everyone else. like, they're all bad. that's the point of the show. I just don't understand how they could stomach it in the first place

You are a warrior, dude.

The reason it took me so long to join Sunnyblr in the first place was the fact that ~early 2020 I was rarely seeing anything here that was based in canon, mostly weird headcanons that made no sense to me, and Reddit genuinely seemed like a more based place to exist for this show.

I literally needed a friend to give me specific accounts to follow because the tag was (and, sorry, lowkey still is) a nightmare. (Though to be fair I’ve been in fandoms on Tumblr for over a decade and literally never liked scrolling tags.)

I got into Sunny and I fell in love with Sunny because of canon. Because it’s so fucking weird and fucked up but it’s FUNNY, and there’s genuinely nothing like it. The characters are horrible stupid terrible people but they’re actually deeply complex and rich to study, so much so that you feel extremely compelled in a multitude of ways to dedicate yourself to some part of them, or all parts of them. But.. if you strip them of those core identities, of what the characters stand for, that compulsion is gone, void, irrelevant.

Because it’s the extremely raw, almost purely acting on basic instinct, unfiltered humanity, worst parts of the self, inability to recognise or follow societal norms aspects of these characters that are relatable. It’s relatable in a way that *should* make you uncomfortable, feel unsettled, and maybe a little relieved that these parts of people can be acknowledged... That’s a unique and interesting feeling, something people engage with media like this to explore and expand upon, and it’s often something that genuinely helps or supports people who wrestle with a lot of the heavy concepts Sunny satirises (and sometimes just, shoves at you head on).

When people start to disregard all of this, for whatever reason they do, that’s when you end up with the Fandom using Sunny Characters as an “ability to project” or (much worse) a “near blank canvas to play with” (because, yeah, if you strip them of their literal reason for being created and continued existence, ofc you lose their whole identity!?)

The problem seems to be that either 1) they just don’t understand the show well enough to get that they’re disregarding this aspect of the plots and characters, and so they genuinely don’t recognise that the fandom for Sunny exists because of these terrible compulsions and insane trauma exploration and that’s why we enjoy discussing and playing with these characters or 2) they do understand this but they can’t engage with it without some kind of personal moral conundrum or extreme discomfort, so they have to sanitise or completely alter the characters to enjoy them.

The thing is, if you fall into category 2, you just don’t belong in the depths of it all, and it’s an unfortunate truth you have to face. If you cannot enjoy canon, if the actual show makes you extremely uncomfortable and you’re only here for a gay ship or to project your gender and sexuality onto one character, you need to go stan something else. I say that with the greatest intentions for you. As Anon here has stated, it’s an insane cycle in this fandom over and over, you’re just going to upset yourself and resent the show and the people here, because we like the canon and the fuckery because that’s what the show is for. That is the literal point of the show at the end of the day.

Now if you’re in category 1, I heavily encourage you to actually *talk to people about the show and the characters*, read analysis, watch the episodes with different frames of reference and in alternate states of mind. Do your own analysis or character work, try and just write out the plot of your favourite episode and put to words *why* you like it. Hell, try and write a fanfic or a spec script from the mind of one of the characters, even if you think you can’t write.

Honestly, honestly, honestly, if you genuinely like this show at face value but you’re only engaging with fanon because you feel like you ‘shouldn’t’ openly enjoy the canon because it’s seen as ‘bad,’ the best thing you can do is have a conversation with someone, or multiple people, who get the show.

That being said, I do wanna open this shell Discord I’ve made to people. For people who *enjoy* the canon, who want to discuss actual Sunny (and also have fun with it, of course!) you’re welcome to join.

A lot of you get it. I’ve made some amazing friends in this fandom and regularly have extremely stimulating and insanely throught provoking convos with the people I’ve met here. I love it, it drives my insane passion for this show and I am eternally grateful to have found people who love this show for what it is. I hope, if you’re struggling to figure out why you like this show or struggling to accept that you like media like Sunny, you reach out or join a conversation and learn to love it too. And if you don’t, if you genuinely hate the canon of this show and only like the version of Macdennis you saw in a dozen different Tiktok edits to Taylor Swift songs, I really hope you move on for your own sake.

[syndrossi]

i did in fact read the chapter instead of grading tests during my free period. sue me🤷‍♀️

I LOVE IT BY THE WAY

THE NAMESDAY GIFTS; RHAEGAR GOING INSANE OVER THE VALYRIAN BOOK AND JON THINKING OF SETTING THE SHIPS AFLAME WITH SHADOW

Daemon must be so proud of his boys🥹🥹

extra:

Aemond comin’ in STRONG with the jealousy over Rhaegar (pun not intended)

Jon having to deal with full-on Valyrian in his chambers

Daemon walking in on the boys awake doing their studies and feeling GUILT over the fact that they dont allow themselves to be kids and just play and get up to mischief🥺

i hope Daemon asks the Velaryon boys over to supper, they’re all alone

Jon knowing exactly how insane Rhaegar will get with that book

The twins hugging their dad

i wonder when J & R will call Daemon ‘father’ amongst each other, like it just comes out and from that moment on, he’s never ‘Daemon’ again, he’s their dad🥺🥺😭😭😭

Look, sometimes you need to reward yourself BEFORE you grade tests. Build up that willpower, ya know?

Hey now, at least Aemond acknowledged Jon as eligible to play as Aemon!

Poor Jon's like "what is this fresh hell" with the sudden Valyrian outside of lessons. Daemon's on a mission though, and once he recruits Rhaegar to his cause, it's all over for Jon. 😂

Every time the twins do something that reminds Daemon that they didn't have a happy, carefree childhood, it stabs him in the heart. And they don't even realize it half the time, because "is actually carting around an extra 6-11 years of life experience and trauma" is easily mistaken for Allard being by turns abusive, neglectful, unloving, and a hardass. He assumes they'll just play when they're on their own, and it breaks his heart that they don't. That they need permission or to be prompted. Poor man has no clue that half the time the twins are whispering in their chamber, it has nothing to do with mischief and everything to do with weighty concerns and strategizing and grief.

Too bad Laenor's gone. Daemon was ready to bust down his door and demand to know every single possible toy a boy of eight might like. His gifts leaned a bit heavily on the practical side; you can imagine him panic-scrambling for those wooden boats, at least something that the boys can play with in their apartments. (The other two were very good, mind you! He won 1000 approval from Rhaegar, and the map stuff is something that Jon finds interesting/compelling, as well as touching from a "passed down through generations" sense. Both gifts had a legacy to them, a connection to their family's past. A way of Daemon telling them that they belong.)

We do see Jon referring to Daemon more often as "his/their father" in his head, though still not much aloud. I'm very particular about the frequency of that kind of thing. (You can see it with Raymar becoming "his brother" to Jon, and then "Raymar" becoming "Rhaegar" in his head.) As to when one of them calls Daemon "father" to his face in a non-dreamwine-induced-panic? Sooner than you might think...

[eddiediazismyhusband]

the weponizing of gayness is getting out of hand. you're called a homophobe if you don't ship two people. you're called a homophobe if you don't like a gay character because of their racist and misogynistic past. i genuinely don't believe that a lot of these people have ever been exposed to real bigotry in their entire lives, or they're just straight

Like i’ve said most of the people I’ve seen making these takes are either straight white cis women or white cis gay men who both have an insane amount of privilege in the community to the point that the plights of others aren’t on their radar….

like im not saying they haven’t experienced any kind of discrimination, i am sure they have, but being cisgender white people, there is a level of privilege there that refracts their view of what bigotry actually looks like to a certain degree that they view anything critical of their interests as being violently homophobic.

i myself am a white gay amab person (i’m nonbinary, but I am passing for male) so I definitely have a certain level of privilege that has protected me from being directly discriminated against in ways I’ve seen my non-white queer friends be treated. that being said (and i am by no means perfect) i do my best to check my privilege before blowing something out of proportion just because it inconveniences or annoys me.

i’ve mentioned on here briefly before that i have faced a lot of discrimination from others growing up in church. my mother sent me to a doctor asking him to try and “fix” me when she found out i was gay. i have been called slurs by people who claim to be “god-loving christians” for just existing within that space. i have been harassed and berated by family members over my queerness because they think the jokes don’t sting (and they don’t care if they do). I’m not saying this to ask for sympathy and pity; I have worked through this in therapy, and I have moved on and attempt to rebuild relationships and salvage what I can. But I say this to provide context of my own experiences as s queer person.

A lot of white queer people have experienced this, but a lot haven’t. A lot of them have grown up in far more accepting environments and only know of bigotry towards queer people from reading/seeing it in media. They see these events and in their inability to understand them within the context of their own experience, they equate their own everyday inconveniences to these things because as humans we often have a desire to be coddled and pitied, so when we aren’t the center of attention for pity, we try to force ourselves into it by blowing things out of proportion, or claiming bigotry and homophobia when that is not the case. The “give me sympathy” card is a staple in the white queer person’s wallet.

Unfortunately, for poc queer people, and non-cisgender people who aren’t ‘passing’ they experience a different level of discrimination and violent bigotry that a lot of white queer people have never experienced. Now that is not to say that white cis queer people have never been the victims of violence, they absolutely have and there are plenty of cases out there to prove it. The fact is that for poc queer people, violent bigotry is often the standard for discrimination they experience. And that is something that unless you have experienced it yourself, you will never really understand the affects that has on a person.

so this idea that disliking a queer character is somehow homophobic comes from a place of blatant privilege. it comes from people who want you to look at them and say “ohhh poor ____, they’re being discriminated against because this fictional character is being criticized for his own bigotry within canon” rather than acknowledging that queer people are not inexcusable of bad behavior. they don’t understand that calling other queer people homophobic for having valid criticisms of a character and the way their story has been handled only shows queer people as this melodramatic clump of people who cry wolf over things that are not im fact actually conducive of homophobia.

I’m sorry I kind of turned this into a discussion of the hierarchy of queer privilege and how it negatively affects the entire community when the privileged minority are loudly complaining about things they don’t like by throwing around the word “homophobic” but unfortunately that seems to be where we are at in this fandom. I didn’t touch much on the straight white cis women of it all, but unfortunately straight white cis women are always trying to steamroll queer people when it comes to discussing queer issues so this is just par for the course.

[chobani-flip]

buddie goggles and why you might enjoy wearing them more if you acknowledge them

so yeah, i think the buddie goggles are a real issue. (ive had them too, fellow shippers, no judgment) like, is it possible that buck and eddie will at some point start a deeply fulfilling romantic relationship? yes. is it what's happening on screen right now and what the show is 100% suggesting is imminent? no. sorry, it's just not.

look, the thing with analysing and interpreting any text is that it's very much about finding things that the text is doing, what could be there, looking at it from different angles and choosing to focus on certain aspects: that's why you have feminist readings of X and queer readings of Y, etc

but if you go looking at a text with the intention of looking for authorial intent and secret messages the author is leaving that only you and the fandom can pick up on correctly? that's such a slippery, tricky slope.

consider:

simply communicating ideas face to face to one single other person can often end in misunderstandings

communicating ideas in writing?... well, we live in the pissing on the poor era of the internet, don't we.

like, how many times have you read/written something, looked at the comments and gone: but...that's not what's there? like, interesting that you see it, but also, i don't know where you got that from

see where I'm going with this?

there is so much that goes into the making of a tv show besides the script and actors' delivery that i am absolutely not an expert on: costumes, set dressing, blocking, lighting, editing, soundtrack...

taking any of those aspects and analysing it and looking for connections is my favourite thing to do and read about and...

ngl, watching the show and looking for buddie in all of them is so much fun. i love it, it's what got me into 911 in the first place.

but i promise you, the moment you stop acknowledging that that's what you're doing, that what you're doing is a Buddie reading of 911, and instead proclaim it as the one single truth? that's when you set yourself up for a wild and not always pleasant ride.

and this isn't about having or not having faith in the writers or buddie or the one they call tim, and honestly, it's kind of telling that the word "faith" is used so often.

it's about accepting that while watching a tv show, we're all putting ourselves in a position of observing the shadows of plato's cave with binoculars on a low-visibility day. (ok. that's a really pretentious twatty thing to say, but i'll leave it there because i think the image is funny. ) and no amount of media literacy is going to give you a clear insight into the minds and intentions of all of the people creating the show (can we please stop shouting at people to get "media literacy" if they disagree with our interpretation of a text, even if what they're saying sounds dumb)

now, i don't know if yall were here for the TJLC thing back then, and I am absolutely not saying that what the Sherlock show did and what 911 is doing is in any shape or form similar, however, on tumblr and amongst the fandom, the lead-up to season 4 and then the secret fourth episode fallout felt exactly like what some parts of the 911 fandom are doing now. so... just take care, friends. and don't be dicks to people who disagree with you over a ship.

[jonathan-cranes-mistress-of-fear]

Hey! This is Anon from the "love OC's ask". I just wanted to thank you for defending the OC's from idtiots on internet. Like the post Amor made about Scarecrow's work still being used was such fun thing to read. To have someone call it cringe just because they add something about they OC in regard to the post is upsetting. They even added warning before OC part so people can skip it! I adore Amor headcanons either they are about Jonathan or her OC and relationships with them. But why do you think Scarecrow has such toxic part of fanbase? Like they even don't acknowledge his "canonical" comic partners. Like Sherry Squires was big part of Masters of fear! Jonathan or Linda Friitawa and her relationship with Scarebeast! Jonathan? Why are some people so mad that Jonathan has a partner, be it canonical, OC or self insert?

Misogyny and fetishization is your answer, as mentioned in a previous ask. This isn't just Scarecrow, it's any and all shippable male characters. If given the choice between shipping two males who (more often than not) never interact / absolutely hate each other, or shipping a canon male/female ship, they're gonna ship the gay stuff.

Look, I have absolutely nothing against shipping an lgbtqia+ pair, but don't think you're being sneaky when you very obviously ignore or erase canon in any capacity to make your ship work. Note, this isn't just a problem in the rogues fandom, it's ALL fandoms. (it can also be said that erasing a characters culture or skin tone falls into the same bucket of oh fuck no. Ever see people complain about Damian Wayne being drawn to look white? It's a real issue; and not just in comics)

This is a multifaceted issue. The majority of pop culture is straight and white. Obviously we're getting better. I see more gay ships in popular shows, I see more non-white characters with real stories and lives that aren't used for a racist joke ala family guy

I totally get wanting to explore dynamics of different ships, or shipping what you as a person are attracted to. That is always OKAY. Wanting to see yourself as the hero, for example, is okay. Characters like Tiana did SO MUCH for children who previously didn't see themselves as a disney princess.

Let it be known, your average gay male ship isn't an issue. Nor are most fandoms or people in said fandoms. Most people genuinely just ship for fun. Many are multi shippers. Many have m/f and m/m and that's being really general and not mentioning trans ships!

Its when very loud minority send death threats and tell others to commit suicide because they're shipping a female presenting self insert with a popular male character in a fandom dominated by a certain gay ship.I was once told in an anon ask that I should give up talking about my OC because why would Scarecrow love her when he has Riddler? Riddler is SO MUCH better, nobody cares about my stupid OC!

That's not why I stopped, but it didn't help

Not only that, but men in general greatly dislike popular female characters, not so much for shipping reasons but because they can't imagine a world were men are not in the spotlight. And then there's the problem of straight women blatantly creating fetish content about gay men.

it's a huge can of worms, there's so many strings attached to this issue. I honestly don't know if I am giving the problem justice.

[tangledbea]

Miss Loko but same time its other perfil,i need Tips from one author to another,Currently,I'm having a difficult time with my AO3 profile,especially with the arrival of my most recent fics,I wanted to know how to boost visibility so that other people can read it(Ps:if the question sounded strange,it's because I have a terrible way with words)

Oh, please, call me Bex. 😊

Honestly, I'm not the greatest when it comes to visibility. I have a somewhat large following, but that's been collected over eight years of having this blog, dedicated to a single franchise/fandom. Make sure your fic is tagged well on AO3 with the characters/friendship/romantic ships involved (remember that X Character & Y Character is indicative of a friendship and X Character x Y Character is indicative of a romantic ship), as well as relevant plot points. And then, I post a link to the fic here on Tumblr, using all the fandom tags and the characters involved in the chapter that was just posted. If you're on other social media (I'm not), post links to it there, too.

According to statistical data, the best time to post on AO3 for high visibility is Sunday, Monday and Tuesday between noon and 5:00 PM Pacific Coast Time (PST). As the week goes on, AO3 gets less traffic, so avoid posting on Friday, and don't post midnight PST to early hours of the morning PST. (In other words, @the-writer1988 and I sort of shoot ourselves in the foot by traditionally posting on Fridays. 😅)

But honestly, the best thing you can do for your own mental health in that regard is to not look at the numbers. It doesn't actually matter how many people read it or leave kudos or subscribe to it or anything else. I acknowledge that getting feedback is the lifeblood of authors, and it's emotionally discordant to say, "Write for yourself, it doesn't matter if anyone else reads it," because... yeah, it actually does. People write fanfiction for the community of it. They want to present something to the community and get feedback on it. But try not to look at the numbers.

In order to spread that community, read fics and leave comments on them (which you do! I absolutely know you're commenting on Tangled: Between the Kisses!). Build your circle here, on a Discord server, wherever. Your friends are more likely to read your fics than random strangers are.

Also, remember that not everything you write is going to be everyone's cup of tea, so don't be offended if people don't read your stuff simply because they're not interested. There's nothing wrong with people curating their fic library. Write the stories you're interested in reading, though. Don't cater to what you think people want to read. You aren't making money off of this, and you aren't beholden to the masses or a publisher. Just be true to yourself.

[hephaestiions]

i just read when you unfold me and really loved it, i've been following your work since dinner and diatribes and this felt like it had the same vibe. you write drarry so tenderly... i was wondering where that comes from? your characters aren't very OOC but tenderness isn't something i expect from canon draco or harry at all

thank you for the kind words, anon, i'm glad you enjoyed when you unfold me!

interesting question, and the first thing that came to mind was that— well— i'm so tender towards this ship. i think that bleeds. i really adore these characters, where in life canon leaves them (ignoring the epilogue) and how i feel their dynamic progresses from there.

but, other than that, look— when it comes to writing h/d, you're always working with two people who have never, never, for seven years, been able to fall out of each other's orbit. canon leaves you with the raw, torn edges of a complicated dynamic that never satisfyingly resolves itself, that barely even acknowledges itself as anything to be resolved, and you have all this passion, rage, history, hurt, layered forgiveness and contempt which effectively amounts, within the narrative, to nothing. and that's usually always my starting point in thinking about a fic (even if i'm writing years-later established relationship like with d&d)— you have all this simmering, spilling intensity between them— where does it go? what does it become? every h/d narrative is a different answer to that question.

and i guess, to answer you— all of that, for me, sublimates in a post-war environment, eventually into tenderness. there is too much there to not become, in an environment of encounter, this scorching, massive, terrifying thing— and what, for war-hardened boys, or men, or what-have-you, burns brighter or is bigger or scarier than opening yourself up to touch and trust? i think canon, when taken seriously, gives us a harry & draco who are capable of and have seen untold brutality; i guess my fics try (and wyum most explicitly) to capture the idea that post-war, they're comfortable with and wary of brutality in mirroring ways, they go to seek it out, they expect it in each other and encounter something entirely alien and totally familiar. tenderness is brutal because brutal, ultimately, is a value-neutral word, yes, ravaging, intense, blunt-force transformative, but that doesn't always leave you bleeding on a bathroom floor.

i don't think i necessarily achieve all this commentary in my fics, i'm too caught up in writing porn in the shorter stuff & Other Things in anything longer. but if i think about how i approach tenderness, beyond, say, the surface of i'd really like to see these two taking care of each other, this is what i have.

[l-in-the-light]

New masterpost!

Welcome to my completely normal, not-Law obssessed tumblr! Oh who am I kidding, you're probably peeking here also for more Law, in that case, enjoy!

I usually write One Piece meta, because this is what I enjoy doing the most. So far I have these blasphemies yappings to offer (I keep this list mostly for myself, but it lists all of my analysis posts, answered asks and useful tags to navigate easier towards interesting topics):

Trafalgar Law and his fear of touch and closeness (analysis):

A very scrutinizing look at Law's traumas as a result of his childhood. Seems he has some triggers that kick him into PTSD reactions, especially relating touch:

Law's fear of being touched and touching others - I reccommend starting from this one, this is part 1

Law's closeness with Luffy

Law's closeness with Doflamingo's Family

Law's rare friendships (Kinemon, Heart Pirates, Wolf) - I recommend reading part 2 before reading this one, or right after. They're kinda complementing each other.

Law's reasons of avoiding closeness and friendships (a theory) - only read it after all the previous ones. It involves quite a bit of speculation that might spoiler you future manga developments. I might be wrong with my predictions, but feel warned!

The most embarrassing series of posts about Lawlu you will ever read:

The fish (scrutinizing analysis and interpretation of every Law and Luffy's interaction in the manga, I will prove my point that they're absolutely embarrassing in how much they like each other, you're free to interpret it as romantic or not):

Punk Hazard part 1 / Punk Hazard part 2 / Punk Hazard part 3 / Post-Punk Hazard part 4 / Dressrosa part 5 / Dressrosa part 6 / Dressrosa part 7 / Dressrosa part 8 / Dressrosa part 9 / Zou part 10 / Zou part 11 / Whole Cake Island part 12 / Wano part 13 / Bonus part - Law staring at Luffy

The fishing rod: (the tool theory allowing you to go and fish the treasure by yourself. And do go and fish, because I want to read even more embarrassing posts about Lawlu and other ships!)

About pirates and their treasure (a theory) - everything related to the theory is located in this tag: Love is a hurricane.

(more under cut!)

More character studies about Tragalgar Law:

About Law's rumoured bad manners and rudeness

Luffy and Law's similarities in expressions, behaviour and beliefs

Law didn't know about kids in Punk Hazard

Law's weakness for cute things explained (includes many examples and reasons for this softspot of his)

Law's poor self-esteem (with evidence!) and a bonus: Does Law think of himself as handsome or sexy?

Analysis of Law's quote "pirates doing good things repulse me" (fair warning, it's a long one, I delved deep into his psychology here, because I think it's fun)

Trafalgar Law and his surprising fondness of animals (mini-analysis)

Did Law drink this sake or not?!

Why is Law complaining about being ordered around in Wano? (very scrutinizing analysis of his dynamics with Kid and Luffy, and also small acknowledgment of Doflamingo's influence on Law)

Analysis of Corazon and Law's relationship (answers the question of why and whether Law is more dedicated to Cora-san than to Heart Pirates)

Why is Law so grumpy in Wano, can't he relax for a moment?! (short answer: he can't, he carries the whole raid on his back)

Would Law join the Revolutionary Army? (analysis of Revolutionary Army and how Dragon manages it, comparison between Law's and Dragon's possible goals and way of doing things. Since we don't know much about RA this counts as partial theory)

How would Law celebrate his birthday? (this kinda turned into meta fanfiction, enjoy, haha)

Analysis of Law's relationship with his Heart Pirates (100% Hearts appreciation post, I collected most scenes with them together ❤)

Analysis about other One Piece characters and relationships:

A funny tale (a short retelling of Shanks and Buggy going seperate ways in Logue Town from Shanks POV) - just for fun and feels tbh.

Analysis of Shanks and Buggy's talk about their future from chapter 19

Analysis of Katakuri and Luffy's similarities: part 1 (Luffy vs Katakuri and how they're reflections of each other) / part 2 (includes analysis of relationship between Katakuri and Brulee) / bonus thoughts

My various One Piece theories:

About the Red Line and the All Blue

About pirates and their treasures (probably not what you're expecting)

About Law's future development after Wano (warning for potential spoilers, in case I got it right)

13 Strawhats theory (just sharing hints)

About significance of Inherited Will (based on Japanese concepts of On and Giri)

Theory about future of Stussy after Egghead

Could Corazon be possibly alive? (this probably counts as a crazy theory, but there are some sus hints scattered around in the story and I shared some in this series of reblogs)

Link to my list of One Piece tags

My fanfiction:

Misadventures of Law with the Strawhats (slice of life, slight Lawlu but it's a "blink and you will miss it" category really)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 (the final part)

Feel free to send me asks! ✨

If anyone wants to send me an ask, be it about some serious topic to analyze or something just for fun, please don't hold back! I promise I will do my best to answer thoroughly (it might take a few days tho or even weeks, if I get a lot of asks at once, but I will definitely answer every single one of them!). I reserve myself the right to not answer asks that are rude ofc.

You might want to check the my asks tag and Trafalgar Law's love life tag as well, because I might have answered the thing you want to ask about already (or simply peek there to get inspired what to ask me next :D).

[peachymilkandcream]

Ready or Not|Part 1|Yandere Levi x Evelyn

(A/N: I'm so psyched that we can start the next series! If you all thought it was over we're no where close! While this series is going to be shorter I guarantee it's going to be a freaking blast! Comment to be added to the taglist!)

WARNINGS: noncon, dubcon, manipulation, domestic abuse, yandere themes, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, stockholm syndrome, violence, mind breaking, misogyny, etc

=============================================

Erwin found him two days later, when Levi refused to show for work or any of his responsibilities the Commander was forced to drag himself over there and soothe the child's temper tantrum. Probably had too much liquor and too little sex to keep his erratic personality under control.

He didn't have time for this. If he didn't need Levi so much he would've swept him out years ago. He was a good soldier, but he wasn't reliable. How could he continue to run a government with a soldier sabotaging the carefully made trust he'd established.

The house was empty, he swore if Levi went to a fucking bar again he'd really chew his ass this time. Maybe he'd threaten to take Evelyn and his child away until Levi learned how to juggle his responsibilities like an adult.

He was in the living room, the whole place torn to bits after yet another obvious tantrum. But something was off about this one, this time he didn't even acknowledge Erwin's presence, like he was deeply disturbed about something and didn't give a shit about anything else.

"Levi. What happened."

"She's gone Erwin, she's fucking gone!" He emphasized the last word by throwing his empty bottle against the brick fireplace.

"So she finally left you, didn't she?"

"She escaped, I don't know where the hell she went, but I'm going to find out. I'm going to find whoever helped her, and kill them. My son, that bitch took my son!" Levi wept, the first time Erwin had ever seen him so emotional, usually he stopped at nothing to conceal his emotions and appear weak. Poor bastard.

"I'm sure she hasn't gone far, we'll just have to look for her."

"I'll hunt her down to the ends of the earth!"

"Calm down Levi."

"Calm down, calm down!? How can you expect me to be so calm when my wife and child are missing!? They're all I have and you tell me to calm down!?"

Erwin rolled his eyes, the temper tantrums were almost ridiculous at this point. "I won't help you until you relax."

He wiped at his eyes. "Fine, I'm calm, I'm calm."

"Better. Now pull yourself together, and we'll solve this thing."

"Why the hell do you care?"

"I need you stable Levi, and I need your wife's good reputation to keep on top. If it means starting a nationwide manhunt for one woman and toddler then so be it."

=============================================

The sea breeze suited Evelyn well, it had taken a lot of courage for her to get on that boat. The fear of the unknown had paralyzed her for too long, causing the ship's captain to ask her several times if she was actually coming aboard.

But she had. She'd stepped forward into her new future, a life of freedom. And while it had taken a small chunk of her funds to be taken so secretly across the sea it was worth it for this view. Sparkling blue as far as the eye could see. Her last trip by ship was overshadowed with the fear of the world ending, now she could actually enjoy these moments with her son.

Furlan, in the past years he had grown to look just like his father. And while Levi had always been a shitty husband, he was a stellar father, so much in fact that the boy seemed to already prefer him over his mother. The past few nights he'd taken to sobbing uncontrollably since he missed his dear Papa so fiercely. Hopefully he would grow out of it, she couldn't bear to think about a world where her child only desired to be loved and cared for by his abusive father. Perhaps since she was pregnant under such dire circumstances the child craved violence like his father.

The wind threatened to undo all her hard work of getting her hair to stay, but it seemed out here was the only way to get Furlan to stop crying. He held onto her dress firmly, watching the waves as they bounced up and down. This would be good for him, good for both of them. All three of them. Evelyn and her two children, both born and unborn would be able to find a life of peace and tranquility away from Levi.

A fresh start.

[mrs-luigi-vargas]

Here's the fic I wrote for @paper-mario-zine! You can get it here. Check it out for some more awesome art!

~~~ [AO3 Link] ~~~

We Launch in Five

Mario and Kamek have a chat on the deck of Bowser’s airship.

The last remaining of Bowser’s airships capable of flight bustled with activity as minions scurried around getting it ready for liftoff. Kamek stood among them, watching to make sure preparations were going smoothly; as Bowser had been neatly folded into a square shorter than he was with worse mobility, it was up to him to make sure the minions didn't somehow mess something up.

...even if he would rather be sweeping up that conspicuous dirt pile over there.

...ah, but he should focus; he was hardly a groundskeeper anymore. And he’ll hopefully never be again. He’s got enough titles stuffed in his job description as it is.

He glanced starboard and Mario was leaning against the railing, staring off at the other side of the ship. Just standing there, as hard-working members of Bowser’s Army flowed around him like water.

Kamek marched up to him. “What are you just loafing around for?” he said angrily. “Make yourself useful or get out of our way!”

Mario didn't acknowledge his words, lost in his own little world. Kamek’s eye twitched. Back to being ignored, was he?

“Hey!” Kamek jabbed the end of his broom into Mario’s nose. “Are you listening to me?!”

Mario started, looking cross-eyed at the broom in his face. His gaze slid down it to Kamek, who was scowling fiercely at him. Mario’s face turned apologetic in return. His eyes flicked over to what he’d been looking at once more, then he stood up straight and shook his head as if to clear it.

Kamek looked too, to a small crowd of Bob-ombs milling about the door to the cannons. He considered Mario, who was passing him to leave with a face that looked a bit sad, beneath his usual expression.

“Oh,” Kamek said. It sounded amused. “You got attached to one, didn't you?”

Mario stopped in his tracks. He turned around and blinked at Kamek, who smirked at his surprise.

“Yes,” Kamek mused. “It makes sense for a goody-two-shoes like you to do something like that. You know their lives are meant to be short, right? If you start having feelings about that, you'll just find yourself in more trouble than it's worth.”

Eyes flashing with indignation, Mario balled his fists with an impressive scowl of his own. Kamek scoffed at the display, rolling his eyes.

“Seriously,” he continued, “do you even know how many walk out of the factories every day? There are hundreds, sometimes! They’re all disposable! Take it from me, if you grieve after every single one, you'll burn yourself out in no time. Besides” — Kamek crossed his arms — “they hardly do much these days, aside from being sent out to fight you.”

Mario’s glare froze. It melted into something troubled.

“Oh, for the love of —!” Kamek poked Mario’s chest with his broom. “You heroes always make everything about yourselves. It's not like we expressly tell them to blow themselves up for good; it's hardly anyone’s problem if some of them get overzealous trying to defeat you. They're really not allowed to be that stupid unless it's an emergency, which” — Kamek’s face fell — “I suppose this classifies as.”

Mario frowned. He raised his head, looking up at where Olivia was flying up by the mast with Bowser Junior, and Kamek wondered if the emergency the Bob-omb Mario was thinking about had given it their all for had something to do with her.

“Well, all’s unfair in war, it seems.” Kamek sighed. “The Bob-ombs will be in the cannons,” he told Mario. “It’s doubtful we’ll be allowed to storm Peach’s Castle without resistance. So don't waste time in hesitating for them; they'd rather go out with their impact, as you surely already know. And defending us — you — so you can go do your hero thing certainly is an impact worthy of having.

“Falling out of the sky into the ocean would be a most unfortunate fate in comparison,” Kamek added, leveling Mario with a glare. “So you’d better not screw up!”

Kamek didn't take his eyes off Mario until he received a firm nod in answer, after which he stalked away to yell at a stray Shy Guy for making a mess. Mario fell into step behind him, and it admittedly took a while for Kamek to realize he’d done so, caught up as he was in mentally bemoaning the incompetence that surrounded him.

“...What are you doing?”

Mario shrugged, grinning.

Nearby, a Koopa tripped, the crate they were carrying flying up into the air. Kamek drew his wand to catch it with his magic. “Be careful!” Kamek snapped as Mario helped them back onto their feet. They paid him little attention, busy staring starstruck at Mario. Kamek grumbled about being ignored yet again as they scurried away with a blush on their cheeks. Mario jumped up to grab the crate still floating in the air, and waited patiently for Kamek to get the ire out of his system.

Kamek’s complaints petered out as he noticed Mario with the crate under his arm, watching him expectantly. The confused scrunch of his face shifted to mild irritation fairly quickly, though. “I suppose I did want you to be useful,” he muttered. If only everyone was as eager about receiving orders from him. “Put that over there” — he pointed — “and then go get Olivia and talk to King Bowser; we’re practically ready for liftoff.”

Mario nodded enthusiastically and hurried off to do just that. Kamek watched him go with a huff, then went to go chat with the airship pilot.

Minutes after that, the airship took flight, soaring towards the volcano upon which Princess Peach’s Castle sat. As predicted, there were origami aircraft ready to meet them, to knock them out of the sky. And when Mario had to man the main cannon to defend the airship, Kamek was pleased to note that he didn't miss a single shot. A more than adequate performance, if he did say so himself.

[castlebyersafterdark]

I find the way they both interact with the concept of byler to be very interesting,sometimes eye brow raising, and even complicated in Noah’s case since he said playing Will essentially made him realize/accept (however he framed it) his own sexuality…

Wholeheartedly agree with vinny's response here as the mature and practical way to look at the strange vocation of acting. Its a very strange mix of professional AND personal - and this, i think, is what creates tension in the is RPF morally acceptable? debate. because if we're talking literal speculation about whether two people have the hots for each other... name a less groundbreaking pastime lmao. imagine the saucy gossip that would have been spreading through the roman baths in like... 78 BC lol. human love and connection have ALWAYS interested people.

but for some reason there is disapproval about discussing chemistry and potential attraction when it comes to actors who also portray fictional characters. you don't see frowns when people pair actors together in regular celeb gossip columns; it's only through the lens of 'fandom shipping', where fictional blends with real, that it gets hate. perhapss most see it as an extrapolation with no grounds, a crossing of boundaries? but for me, its a question of your emotional intelligence as an audience member: can you separate fiction from reality in a mature way while also acknowledging that you see something sparkling in the reality? it's not NOT possible. but are you being honest with yourself about the origin of the chemistry? for me, noah and finn have it in spades, and i dont need them to officially start a relationship to prove it, because that, for me, is not the only sign of two people having true feelings for each other.

and even though professionalism should be top priority on a film set - on s5 of ST - let's not discount the fact that actors are human first and foremost, and not only that, but creatives, storytellers, performers, who are most likely more sensitive and emotionally affected than most 'regular' non-creative folk. sure, noah and finn started acting as kids, so perhaps they're not passionate about the craft like someone who chose the career later in life might be. but in a way, that's MORE telling? because their authentic selves would have been spilling out accidentally on red carpets and in interviews as they grew, no matter how much media training they had. there are unique circumstances that mirror their real lives and the show; growing up together, noah's queerness. it's not like two middle aged actors who barely know each other, portraying a totally fictive romance where their chemistry is the only similarity.

anyway, no amount of professionalism is going to prevent real feelings potentially arising. having feelings is not unprofessional; it's about how you deal with those feelings. and their behaviour is very, very interesting.

Noah is very intense, and candid about his intensity, especially re: byler. I think his tweets are certainly marketing in some ways, but you can't deny that he's not exactly, to put it bluntly... cool about it haha! He's not a nerd like finn is a nerd, but he's not cool and collected, you know? He is clearly comfortable having a public image (whether fabricated or not) of being someone who wears his heart on his sleeve. He and his team have clearly chosen to go down the route of: 'this actor is a bubbly young man who has no filter'. Even without the many times he's accidentally spoiled the show (lmao), it seems to me like Noah's passion IS authentic precisely BECAUSE being a young male actor these days often IS about being too cool for school, and Noah exhibits many traits that do not fit our society's idea of a cool young guy.

He's clumsy. He says things that could be seen as cringe. He is passionate and open. He admits to crying a lot. He makes tiktok lives naked shirtless from his bed. He gushes about Harry Styles. He does silly dances on social media. He gushes about byler. None of these things are objectively uncool - that's not a thing - and tiktok dances are popular, sure, but it's the WAY he does them. If he and his team wanted to craft a different persona that might have launched him into higher echelons of the A-List cool list, they could have. But I personally love how authentic noah feels. He is living life for himself, going to college, speaking honestly, being totally real. I respect that a lot.

And I think Finn does too, even though they might have clashed as younger teens, because he speaks highly of noah's coming out especially, and Finn also lives life for himself. My eyebrows have raised many many times seeing how Noah handles byler, and quite honestly, I wonder if Finn was/is more than a little intimidated playing opposite this rambunctious, passionate guy who is most likely going to kiss him within an inch of his life when they finally get to the s5 byler scenes lmao.

Then we have Mr Wolfhard. Finn, Finn, Finn. This year during filming, he seems... calm. Happy, glowing. My instincts tell me that he's, at the very least, enjoying this season and getting artistic satiation from it, whether that's reuniting a final time with the gang, pure nostalgia, gratitude, or enjoying filming byler. Probably all of the above. Viewing his behaviour through the lens of his disgruntlement with mileven in prior seasons' press, however, is hilarious - because whereas at one time it could have seemed like he was a teen boy who was embarrassed to talk romance, it's now looking more and more Mike Wheeler-esque. He was a young guy who was sick to death of hearing 'mileven mileven mileven' non-stop, perhaps without really knowing why. Honestly, if Finn's life ends up echoing Mike's in the way Noah's has with Will's, it'd be so coincidental that it's almost ludicrous, yet so so beautiful; and no wonder they'd both be reeling from it for a very long time. We're only just in the midst of filming - perhaps the most telling events have yet to come?

I will agree that Finn's s4 interviews were very telling re: whether byler will happen - the giggling, as you mentioned, because eyes and smiles don't lie, even on actors when they're off the clock. Finn's responses, if will's romance storyline was going to be tragic, were nonsensical. As for a kiss, I think they have already filmed one. If not, their giggles were certainly anticipatory, and there's definitely a similarity between finn's gigglyness and noah's glee at byler, isn't there? Whether that's thrill at good storytelling, or a hint to Finn's queerness, or both... you decide! Because being passionate about a story is one thing, but being reduced to self-conscious giggles, especially at age 19 or so? When portraying a romance at a younger age did NOT make you giggly during press...??? Very interesting.

For me, it's the other aspects of Finn's personality that prevent people from seeing foah as a possibility. Finn is too cool for school, reserved and private. Half of his press responses to byler HAVE mirrored his one's for mileven - 'why would I ship my own show?' etc. But there's that cheeky other half of the time, where he giggles or looks discreetly right down the camera, as if he's trying to silently tell us something. Even if he just adores byler, I find that very endearing.

And let's not forget that they're both totally adorable. At the very least I expect s5 press where they respond to questions portraying this romance. Noah laughing and saying "I wasn't exactly complaining" on Jimmy Fallon or something. "I mean, look at him" as Finn points to a magazine cover with Noah splashed on the front for s5 promo.

Lastly, noah's storyline/real life convergence is impactful. There's no way that this isn't something that influences the rest of his life. And, seeing as he was a teenager growing up with Will, I can't see how he could have entirely separated finn from mike, will's love from his own feelings, whether they were an actual crush, or simply the love and trust that comes from a genuine transformative friendship. The crazy thing is that noah has admitted in interviews that he looks at finn and sees Mike - so, with regard to what I said about about noah having no filter, take that as you will. If this is what he is saying publicly, what on earth is going on inside that head of his?

They are both endlessly fascinating and for me, this doesn't simply feel like RPF but studying the human condition, love and connection itself. Ha! I have nothing but love and respect for the two of them, so I dont feel like my 'shipping' is a bad thing. I think vinny would agree, being the romantic sap he is <3

Posting this one because this says it all, what a thorough read and reflection on these two. Thank you for sharing, I have very little to add, right on right on. So I'll let this one stand alone as a good read!! ❤️❤️❤️

[verynormalaboutkinnporsche]

E6 Scene 5 - Lost Day 2: Cooperation

Oh shit this one got long.

Having solved the water problem, the boys need food. Also, Kinn needs to fucking unbend a little, but on that note I need to take a moment to admire what is literally a single second of screen time here because Mile is such a gift.

You're in love, you sap, just get used to it.

One theme I keep coming back to in these notes is the need to get on a similar level. They start out from wildly different places. They're attracted to each other, they want a relationship, but outside of that night at Hum Bar, they haven't gotten to see much of each other as their real selves. They need this set-apart time to negotiate an equitable way to relate.

Kinn has spent his entire life in what is essentially a prison, but it's a prison that comes with a lot of money, status, and guns. The purpose of Hum Bar and the purpose of this forest interlude is to remove those weights from the balance, so the two of them are on an equal footing for connection-building moments. Once the connection is in place, it can withstand life in the Panopticon (where the plot happens), but it has to be created outside of it.

Given the damage done to that connection in the previous episode, they need to do some work before they can move forward. They have to be free to bicker, shove, and call each other a moron without risk of consequences, to trust each other when it's just the two of them before they can do it surrounded by enemies.

They manage to catch some fish.

"Why do you keep your smiles to yourself?" (Oh no, my heart.) He's right, though; up to this point we've hardly ever seen Kinn smile. It's a largely teasing exchange, but it acknowledges how deeply unhappy Kinn is with his life, how much of a facade he maintains. Porsche is finally getting to see more of the real Kinn here, and he's clearly liking that.

(Porsche is a much less guarded character than Kinn; to the extent that he maintains a facade of his own, he uses humor. That doesn't mean that he doesn't have things he keeps back, though.)

A bracing stream bath is in order, which rapidly turns into stream cuddling and then stream kissing. They might not have actually invented onscreen chemistry but they do a damn fine job of it. Very interesting how Kinn breaks off then; they've made progress, but there's still a lot that needs to be said.

Really with the dick size thing, you two literally had sex, were you not paying attention? Back to connection-building with personal information.

This exchange is so, so interesting to me. Porsche's dream is all about personal freedom--to do what he wants, when he wants. This makes sense given both his character themes and his actual history, a life spent in the dual constraints of poverty and responsibility. (Plus one of his frequent minor themes, food. You will never convince me that he hasn't skipped a lot of meals so that Chay wouldn't lack something.)

Porsche's dream has sad implications about the material circumstances of his life; Kinn's side of the conversation does the same for his emotional circumstances.

(This scene is where my love-to-hate-him of Korn achieved self-sustaining fusion for the degree of calculation involved. We see this from him long before we see Gun's more obvious kind of abuse. Given the sliding scale of morality employed by the show, I find it interesting that this is underlined as the worst type of evil.)

Love Porsche here, by the way, for not letting Kinn dodge the question. "If you don't tell me yours, it's not fair"; we are back to the need for equity, for balance.

(They have a pattern of doing things wrong, figuring that out and trying over again. Probably why I find them a compelling ship; they're so stubborn about not giving each other up.)

After the lightening musical interlude, the conversation takes a turn for the truly serious, with Kinn talking about Khun, and then Porsche the accident. We are deep in the connection-building zone now, a layer below dreams and into things that neither of them shares with... maybe anyone, ever.

And then:

"If I could, I would want to erase the things I did you wrong."

(Now that I think about it, Kinn does this more than once. They'll have an exchange that's 50/50 teasing/serious, there's a pause, and then he takes it up a level. Kind of astonishing, given his lack of healthy communication models.)

It's not a complete apology, but it's the first essential step, the acknowledgement of harm. Porsche is so not prepared for this; his body language is all over the place, barely any eye contact, wants to just skate past the whole thing for the moment.

Still; a big step forward.

What we learned:

Porsche is marginally better equipped for this situation than Kinn. Marginally.

Porsche is afraid of ghosts.

Sometimes Kinn wonders if Khun is faking his mental instability

Porsche has a period of amnesia around the car accident that killed his parents, and spent months in the hospital (since there was no car accident, we are left to speculate as to what actually caused his memory loss and also who was taking care of baby Chay? Thee? Ugh.)

[pipsqk-art]

i was challenged to write a short ship fic about mistletoe :] so i did :]

(unnamed modern au)

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You don't remember the last time you actually decorated for the holidays, much less celebrated them. People from the temple and coworkers would always give you little things and invite you to parties but you couldn't bring yourself to participate. Too busy drowning in grief and...other things.

Being with Jaq has changed how you see the whole affair. These holidays aren't just for acknowledging important religious history; they're a chance to cherish the people in your life, remember those who have passed, and celebrate living. She's changed a lot of things and you're not quite sure how to be grateful. For now, you're helping her decorate the apartment.

It's been over a decade since you celebrated Winter's Crest so she's guided you towards simple tasks like folding paper snowflakes and placing little deer figurines on every available surface. After tying some bows onto a small plant you noticed her tack a small bunch of leaves and berries to the top of the entryway to the kitchen. You'll have to ask her to remind you of the meaning behind all these traditions.

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