#you can yell at her hate her fight with her over the abandonment all that

[darkfictionjude]

Please Jude I want to hate on Nia to give her and mc relationships development

I never know what you guys are expecting when you tell me you want to hit Nia or verbally assault her…

[timkontheunsure]

"and if he's only here as a prisoner, what kind of monster does that make me?"

Ok think I've finally worked out what was bugging me with them miscommunicating when Blitz yells.

"Would he want me if he were free?" Stolas' starting premise is if Blitz wasn't ok with the deal, and didn't like him; then he's a monster and an abuser.

If it's was only sex to Blitz, then he's just like Stella.

It's why he gives up, saying he has his answer; when Blitz assumes the crystal must be a prop for more of their deal.

"tethered to someone in such an unfair way". Ok this bit had my mind immediately go to the divorce.

The marriage was arranged by someone must more powerful than Stolas, to someone he'd never choose for himself. An "entire life's been written in stone" in fact; he thinks he's done the same thing to the man he loves.

While it is perfectly reasonable for Blitz to get angry, feeling blindsided and dismissed; asking for a "fucking minute", the next bit reads very differently to both of them.

"You spring this feeling bullshit on me. Are you fucking kidding! *Kicks open the door* Can I get a Fucking minute to think after everything you put me through! You pompous rich Asshole! *Stolas' flinches the same way he does when Stella screams at him.*

"Treat me like one of your little butler imps. You can't just Dismiss me like that. I mean you royal Fucks think you can think you can do this every single time. Like you can just play with our feelings, because we're smaller and not as important. Well I'm Not letting you bitch. *Flinches again* Let's Go!".

Blitz is telling Stolas that he doesn't want to be sent away, and that he wants think about it. His abandonment issues are fully kicked in.

He's trying to force Stolas into a fight, to get him to engage with him. Likely a repeated pattern from his last serious relationship with Voroskia.

Trying to pick a fight, to get to make up sex, to get them back to 'normal'. Because that's how he's been dealing with their "complicated" for a while now. If it's about sex he knows how to deal with what they have.

(Blitz is word perfect on the fight with Verosika after all; so they probably got back together a few times after stealing from her).

Blitz immediately goes to "I can do better", and try give it back; when he thinks Stolas doesn't want to see him anymore.

"you royal Fucks think you can think you can do this every single time."

But that's not what Stolas is hearing right now. Stolas hears is 'your all the same. All royal are as bad as eachother'.

It's very close to Striker explaining how the world works during his torture.

And now he thinks that the only man he's ever loved hates him because what he is.

That's what he meant by "think so of low of me".

And he's not exactly wrong. Fizz even calls Blitz on hating that Stolas is a prince.

And Blitz does say "They're all the fuckin' same". (Blitz isn't wrong for calling out Stolas on how he treats his staff either)...

Then there's the bit that seems fairly contentious. Stolas portaling Blitz out.

Stolas is a domestic abuse survivor, only a couple of weeks out of the hospital, because his wife tried to murder him. He's going freak out at loud voices, angry swearing, and doors being kicked in.

He going assume that this is Blitz getting a few kicks in on the way out; not him genuinely trying to talk through their problems just because of the format.

They are both stumbling over eachothers trauma landmines here.

Neither is wrong.

Not Stolas for walking away, or making the shouty person leave.

Not Blitz for getting scared, upset and feeling abandoned. Thinking Stolas isn't giving him a chance to think it through.

Blitz is going to get that time he wants to think it over. It's not an all or none thing.

He now has his business safe and secured in his own hands, and knows that Stolas likes him too. Those are biggys.

It's entirely up to Blitz what he wants to do now.

[carolperkinsexgirlfriend]

can you see the stars in your dreams (and do they have a lot to say about me) - Part 12

Or: a secret Admirer AU

PART 1 || PART 2 || PART 3 || PART 4 || PART 5 || PART 6 || PART 7 || PART 8 || PART 9 || PART 10 || PART 11

He’s got to be heading to the quarry, right? That’s where he goes on Wednesday’s after school to sell his stash, he’d told Steve so umpteen notes back. Steve’s poured over each one enough times to damn-near have the things memorized.

He’s in his car, speeding fast enough that if Hopper catches his ass, he’ll be hauled into a jail cell before he can even make it. Steve pushes his foot down on the pedal harder, trying to eke out any last bit of speed.

When he reaches his destination, Carver’s car is parked sideways across the dirt road that leads off to the quarry, blocking anyone else from entering. Steve slams on his breaks, kicking up dirt all around him, obscuring his view of the windshield.

He steps out into it, dust gritting up his eyes. The only way out is through, so he heads toward the sound of raised voices, stumbling over a raised root as he goes.

He can just barely make out the words now.

“—leave her alone, or you’re dead, do you hear me?” Carver’s not yelling, but when he comes into view, his eyes are hard, and he’s clutching at Eddie’s t-shirt with enough force that he’s holding his knees off the ground.

There’s blood on Eddie’s face, dripping down off it and staining the dirt beneath him.

Steve doesn’t think. “Hey!” he calls, rushing forward to insert himself between them, but before he can, Carver drops Eddie into an ungainly heap on the ground and spins around to face Steve.

Steve lets him; if his eyes are on him, then he’s not looking at Eddie.

“Harrington?” Carver asks, shoulders slumping like Steve’s a friendly, not one wrong move from popping him one in the nose. “What are you—”

“Why don’t you get the hell out of here before the cops show?” Steve asks, using his Team Captain voice.

Steve watches it land. Carver’s shoulder slump, and he looks over Steve’s shoulder at where he’d abandoned his car. But then Eddie spits a glob of blood onto the ground, and Carver’s face shores up into something vicious.

“He was going to ask your girlfriend out, I heard all about it from his little friend!” Carver spits, like the words hurt as they come out of his mouth. “You should thank me on hands and knees!”

“I bet you’d love him on his knees,” Eddie cuts in, words slurring worryingly together.

Carver turns back toward Eddie, face gone almost translucent in the light of the afternoon sun. “Why, you—“

“Shut up, man,” Steve says, finally looking away from Carver to where Eddie’s on his knees, partially obscured by Carver’s body.

Eddie looks up at Steve, defiant as he spits a glob of saliva and blood into the dirt again then wipes his mouth with a shaking hand.

Steve stares down at him, stomach twisting in on itself as Eddie’s glare only intensifies. There hadn’t been much in his eyes when he’d been looking at Carver, but when he’s looking at Steve? That’s rage, barely banked by what must be a killer concussion. Steve turns away from it, unable to bear it a moment longer.

“What’s the point of this?” Steve asks Carver, the exhaustion he’s starting to feel leaking into his voice.

“Chrissy doesn’t need—”

“Chrissy is an adult who doesn’t need either of us fighting her battles for her,” Steve cuts in. “Besides, they’re friends.”

Carver’s mouth curls in on itself. “She would never be friends with this f—”

“She’d kick your ass herself if she heard you talking about Munson like that.”

Carver turns his back on Eddie entirely, glaring at Steve like they’re in some sort of quick-draw stand-off in a stupid Western. Steve’s tired of this guy and all his hate, he’s tired of people he loves being hurt, tired of having to be Chrissy’s shield against the asshole in front of him, and Robin’s shoulder to cry on, and going home to an empty fucking house.

He’s just tired.

It’s a relief when Eddie stands on his own two feet, legs visibly shaking but holding his weight. Because nothing will ever stop Eddie from being Eddie, he claps like Steve and Jason are kindergartners and he’s their beleaguered teacher sent to corral them.

“Well, this has been fun,” Eddie says, grinning around the blood in his teeth. “But there’s only so much jock on jock violence I can take before I break out in hives. So, can I go?”

He throws a taunting thumb over his shoulder where his van’s parked closer to the cliff’s edge, turning to stumble toward it without another word. Carver and Steve both rush to stop him for opposing reasons.

“I’m not done with you,” Carver hisses.

Steve grabs his shoulder, yanking him hard enough to send him stumbling back a few steps. “Leave it, Carver, or I’ll ruin you.”

“What the hell could you even do?” Carver demands.

Steve stares him down, dead-eyed and entirely fed up. “I can tell Chrissy what you did, and she’ll lose what little respect she had for you. Then? I’ll have a meeting with Coach and get you kicked off the team. Then, who knows, maybe I’ll plant drugs in your locker, shave your head while you’re sleeping, vandalize school property in your name. Do you really want to stick around and find out what else I can think of?”

Carver holds his gaze for another, endless second before turning away and slinking back the way he came. Steve watches until Carver starts his own car, swerved recklessly close to Steve’s own parked car, and sped away.

When he turns back, Eddie’s nowhere to be seen. He slinks toward his van, unwilling to spook the guy further if he doesn’t need to.

He’s in the driver’s seat of his van, cursing as his shaking hands fumble with the keys, missing again and again as he tries to jam it into the keyhole.

“You can’t drive,” Steve says quietly.

Eddie still jumps, dropping the keys into the well beneath his feet as he snaps his head up, eyes wide and pupils eating up his face. There’s a bruise already swelling up his eyes, and blood caked beneath his nose. He looks a downright mess.

“Here to finish what your buddy started?” Eddie asks, showing off his bloody teeth again in a grin, as if Steve can’t see him shaking.

Steve shakes his head, throat clogged with too many words to name. What comes out is, “you’re not supposed to drive with a concussion.”

Eddie, tellingly, does not argue the concussion, but his bared teeth are starting to look more like a snarl as he replies, “I’m not leaving my van here.”

Steve stares at him. He’s sweating, with injury or panic, Steve’s not sure. There’s dirt in his hair, like before Steve had arrived, Jason had him on the ground, glossy curls pressed into the dirt. Steve clenches his hands into fists the more he sees. His t-shirt is black, but there’s a rip at its hem that Steve doesn’t think was there before.

He aches to reach through the open window and touch that busted face, find the split in his lip, clear the blood from beneath his nose.

Instead, he opens the driver’s side door, feeling like absolute scum as Eddie shuffles away, eyes wide as he presses himself as far away as possible as Steve climbs in.

“What are you doing?” Eddie asks, voice all wobbly.

Steve bends down to pick up the keys where Eddie had dropped them. He slides the key home and Eddie’s van tick tick ticks itself to life. When Eddie’s music blares, Steve reaches across to turn the dial down, ignoring Eddie’s flinch at his movement.

“Taking you home.”

Eddie’s van is bigger then he’s used to driving, the ride bumpier as he turns around and slides carefully past his own car, his keys probably still abandoned in the driver’s seat somewhere.

Hopefully it’ll still be there when he comes back for it.

*** 

“Did Chrissy put you up to this?” Eddie asks, voice small, small, small.

Harrington’s shoulders slump, clenched fingers loosening on the steering wheel. He sighs, long and loud, perfect hair rustling with the movement.

“Robin, actually,” he replies, lips tucked up into a facsimile of a smile.

Robin, Robin, Robin, does he know a Robin? His brain’s not working, too scrambled up inside. Eddie’s entire face aches as he scrunches it up in thought before cutting that shit out. No thinking for him until some of this heals. Still, he worries against the name, until, “Buckley?” comes out of his mouth.

Harrington smiles, warmer this time. “Yeah, she saw Carver following you.”

“And went to you?” Eddie asks, voice squeaking embarrassingly on the last word.

Harrington doesn’t answer, but his hands clench tight enough against the steering wheel that his knuckles turn white.

Eddie resolves himself to shutting the fuck up for the rest of the drive.

“How do you know where I live?”

“You’re…loud, dude,” Harrington says, pulling into Eddie’s empty driveway. Harrington’s right, he is loud. It still sounds like a lie. “Is your uncle home?”

Eddie squints, busted eye bursting with pain as he asks, “how do you know I live with my uncle?”

Harrington raises his eyebrow, clearly saying “you’re loud, dude,” again without even needing to open his mouth. Eddie kind of hates him for it.

“He’s on a fishing trip,” Eddie sighs.

Without another word, Harrington turns off the engine and slides out of the van, shutting the door gently behind himself. He rounds the front of the van and Eddie sits, stupefied in his seat as Harrington pulls open the passenger side door and holds his hand out like Eddie’s some swooning maiden. Feeling flustered and frustrated in turns, Eddie slaps his hand away and steps out of his van on his own two feet, slamming the door closed behind him.

Harrington doesn’t move out of the way as Eddie storms past, their shoulders banging into each other makes Eddie’s teeth rattle painfully in his bruised skull. He only remembers he doesn’t have his keys when he’s standing in front of his front door, hand empty.

He stares down at it, betrayed.

His house keys jingle in Harrington’s hand as he steps up beside him. Without even a by your leave, he inserts the key into the hole and twists, inexplicably choosing the right key on the first try. Is Steve Harrington a mind reader?

Harrington pushes the door open and holds it open for Eddie, as if it’s not his house they’re walking into.

“What the hell are you doing?” Eddie demands, standing on his own front porch like a loser as Harrington bends down and takes his sneakers off.

He lines them up neatly by the wall like he’s staying in The Ritz or something and doesn’t want to stain the dingy carpet.

“Taking my shoes off?”

“No!” Eddie wails, clutching handfuls of his hair, beyond frustration and into something that feels a lot like hysteria. “What are you doing here?”

Straightening up, Harrington stares down at Eddie where he’s still standing on his own porch. He looks incredulous, as if Eddie’s the one who’d saved him from getting killed by some jock, and Eddie’s the one who followed him home after like a lost puppy.

Like Eddie’s the one that doesn’t quite fit in the trailer park, and not Steve Harrington with his squeaky white shoes and ironed polo, and luscious hair, and skin that’s all sun-kissed even as summer’s barely a memory in a little girl’s eye.

“Your uncle’s not home.”

Eddie stares, gobsmacked. What the fuck are they putting in the water in Loch Nora, Jesus Christ! “So?!”

Harrington squints at him again, his aloof cool-guy shtick finally breaking to show the judgmental mean girl barely hidden beneath. “You’re totally concussed, dude,” Steve replies, a King handing down a decree to his loyal subjects. “Someone’s gotta make sure you don’t like, die.”

Eddie, never one to follow anyone’s decrees but his own, immediately starts bitching. “So, what? You’re playing home invader until someone comes to relieve you?”

He nods, smiling down at Eddie like he’s a puppy who finally learned not to piss on the carpet. Fed up with being a rung lower, Eddie takes that last step up onto the stoop and brushes past Harrington into his own goddamn house.

Harrington shuts and locks the door behind him.

Deciding that discretion is the better part of valor for the first time in his life, Eddie continues further into the trailer without turning around, not stopping until he’s got the bathroom door as a barrier between his vulnerable back and the latest interloper.

The light hurts his eyes as he flicks it on. His face hurts worse, and he can see why, now. One of his eyes is well on its way to swelling shut, a deep red bleeding into purples the farther out it goes. There’s blood beneath his nose, and it’s ballooning out making him look like some old lady’s prized pug. There’s a split going straight through his lip from Carver’s class ring.

He looks like an extra in a horror movie; the guy who’s about to make the sacrifice play because he’s not going to make it. And yeah, maybe there’s a little melodrama in the thought, but Eddie’s pretty sure he deserves it at this point.

God, what a day.

As punctuation to his own thoughts, someone knocks quietly on the door. Eddie’s ribs ache as his shoulders slump, head hanging damn-near into the dirty sink.

“Eddie?” There’s a moment of silence where Eddie’s response is supposed to be. He doesn’t heed it. “Can I come in?”

Eddie groans, loud enough that it’s gotta be audible through the tissue-paper door between them. “Why?” he says–whines pitifully, really.

“I want to check your injuries.”

Eddie, against his better judgment, cracks the door open wide enough to peer through. “What’s it to you, Dr. Harrington?” he asks, that same question wrapped up in a new package. Why are you here, why do you care, what do you want from me?

Harrington just smiles, and pushes at the door with just enough force that Eddie has no choice but to back up and let his unwanted guest in.

He takes Eddie’s face in his hands, rubbing gentle fingers against each wound, murmuring soothing placations. It works enough that Eddie stands still as Harrington sanitizes and bandages each of his wounds.

“You should ice them after this, okay?”

Eddie nods dumbly because Harrington’s moved on from painfully prodding his face to running his fingers through his hair, checking every inch of his skull for bumps and bruises.

“Does it hurt anywhere else?” he asks.

Eddie hums, relaxing against his will, body slumping into the cupboard behind him as those nimble fingers have their way with him.

“My ribs, maybe,” Eddie murmurs, eyes closing as Harrington’s fingernails scrape against his scalp before he withdraws his fingers.

His eyes snap back open a second later when those same fingers yank his shirt up without asking, warm palms chasing away the chill on his skin as they skirt over his ribcage, applying gentle pressure to whatever Harrington finds. Eddie shivers involuntarily as Harrington bends down, breath puffing against his stomach.

“Wh—what are you doing?” Eddie asks, stuttering over every other word.

He’s clenched up tight enough that his whole body aches with it—spine, jaw, wrists. But then Harrington looks up at him, usually impeccable hair softened by the day and flopping gently into his face. Eddie always assumed his eyes were brown, but they look sort of gold in the shitty fluorescent light of the bathroom.

He’s never been this close to Harrington before.

“Checking your ribs,” he replies, breath puffing against Eddie’s uncovered skin with every word. “Does that hurt?”

And then he just dismisses Eddie in favor of palpitating what must be a nasty bruise. Eddie whines, inexplicably, embarrassingly, before squeaking out a tiny, “no,” when Harrington looks back up at him with his big, worried, puppy-dog eyes.

Eddie’s own words to Carver make a reappearance, flashing red in neon lights inside his empty skull—I bet you’d love him on his knees. He’s on them now, between Eddie’s spread thighs, looking at Eddie’s body with an intensity that’s skinning him alive.

His skull’s not empty now; it’s bursting with half-formed thoughts, and panicked wheezing he hopes is just internal, and through it all, the words run rampant—on his knees, on his knees, on his knees.

Steve Harrington stands up, takes a step back, and smiles at Eddie. “I think they’re just bruised,” he says, seeming not to notice Eddie’s ragged breathing. “We should ice them, too.”

And then he just…walks out of the bathroom like Eddie’s not full to bursting with thoughts and feelings he doesn’t understand. Like it wasn’t Harrington that had dropped them at his feet—on his knees.

*** 

Steve sticks his head into Eddie’s freezer and resists the urge to scream. It’s just—Eddie had been blushing when Steve had looked up from checking his ribs for cracks. Steve’s never seen him blush before, and it’s seared into his brain (the way it’d started from his ears and meandered across his cheeks before slowly spreading its splotchy hue down his neck).

For a second, it was almost like Eddie didn’t hate him.

Steve suppresses the thought. Boys shouldn’t have crushes on straight boys who hate their guts, and letting even the tiniest flutter of hope touch his heart would be stupider still. There’s his silly little notes, and there’s his pining little glances.

He doesn’t need anything else.

“Are…you okay?” Eddie’s hesitant voice comes from behind him.

Abruptly remembering his position, Steve pulls his head out of the freezer and grabs the first bag he sees: a half-full package of frozen peas. He turns to Eddie with the best smile he can manage, holding them up as explanation for the unasked What the hell are you doing? hidden beneath the bemused smile on Eddie’s lips.

“Just finding you some ice, dude,” Steve replies breezily, walking over to drop the bag into Eddie’s hand.

“Uh, thanks?” he replies, walking past Steve to close the freezer he’d left open. Steve winces. “You can like, go now.”

It’s a demand hidden beneath a polite question. Steve’s feet start moving toward the door before he remembers the lump he’d felt on the back of Eddie’s head, and the way his eyes had gone all glassy and dazed in the bathroom as Steve had patched him up.

“Unless you want to call someone else, you’re stuck with me until your uncle gets here.” Eddie opens his mouth to protest, but Steve holds up his hands palm out, forestalling his complaints. “Possible concussion, dude.”

Eddie whines, actually stamping his foot squeakily against the linoleum of the kitchen floor. Steve smiles, helplessly endeared, and hates himself for it.

“Why is it your problem if I nod off in my sleep, you don’t even like me.”

The warm feelings flee like they’d never been there at all.

Steve turns his back on Eddie’s petulant frown and stomping feet, unwilling to look him in the eye as the emotions crash through him. Just for a second, he lets his face drop.

“I like you, just fine,” Steve replies, ignoring the little scoff from Eddie in reply.

The trailer’s small and crowded with things on damn-near every surface, but it’s cozy. Steve’s imagined this moment—getting through the Munson’s front door and finally seeing what’s inside. It’s warm, a hot cup of tea, a blanket on a cold night, somewhere to feel safe in.

All Steve feels is cold.

Instead of answering Eddie’s scoff, Steve lets his own little tantrum stomps lead him over to the ratty couch. He sinks down, crossing his legs as he leans back into the cushions, and finally, finally looks at Eddie. He’s still pouting, bottom lip having split open against the pressure of his frown. Steve raises a pointed eyebrow before turning back around to stare at the black of the TV screen.

Eddie groans again, and it takes all his willpower not to turn around, not to let his shoulders curl in as he hears footsteps coming closer. But, all Eddie does is settle onto the other side of the couch and grab the remote.

It’s going to be a long night. 

PART 13

[azrakaban]

Mattheo Riddle Headcanons

Just a few little headcanons I have about my husband, loml, Mattheo Thomas Riddle <3 Sidenote: if you're confused, Tom Riddle is fancasted as the son of Voldemort rather than as voldemort himself, because he is too fit to be a noseless vampire xx

...

- his favourite colour is gray. The reason behind this is he used to know this really sweet smoke coloured cat when he was little and he used to play with her, so isnce then he finds the colour relaxing

- him and Theodore Nott have been friends since they were really young. Like 3 or something.

- when he was younger, he found a copy of peter pan in a bin somewhere, picked it up and read it. He knew his father would kill him if he found out he was keeping a muggle book, so he hid it and it became his favourite book after reading

- when he was really young, Bellatrix (his mother) taught him and Tom occlumency, to be able to hide secrets from their father. She thought it was important for them to have some kind of privacy.

- he would be an arctic monkeys fan (yes I am aware they were not formed at the time he was at Hogwarts, but if he was gen z he'd love them.)

- he's a cat person, due to being bitten by a dog when he was little (no he does not have rabies and no he is not a furry) but he has a soft spot for bernese mountain dogs because Theo Nott has one)

- when I say he has only got eyes for you, I mean it. This man would rather gauge his eyes out than look at any other girl, he is so incredibly loyal.

- He believed Rodolphus Lestrange was his father up until he saw Rodolphus yell at Bellatrix when he was 11 about him not being his son. It broke him, as up until then he had been Mattheo Lestrange. From then on, he went by Mattheo Riddle.

- love language is physical touch, always with an arm around your waist, fiddling with your hair, kissing your cheek, forehead, temple, nose, lips, anywhere he can reach.

- possessive, but not in a controlling way. He has a fear of abandonment, so he likes to know that you're still his. Seeing other guys/girls look at you worries him a little, but he can't blame them because you are literally gorgeous. (and tbh, I don't think he's ever gonna have a problem with you looking at someone else, because he's perfection.)

- would give up anything for you, and gave up smoking immediately after starting to like you.

- absolutely in love with you. I cannot stress this enough, but this man is head over heels, for you, and only you.

- has a soft spot for you. When you first met/saw him, you thought he seemed emotionally unavailable (which he was, besides joking with friends tbh) but that changed for you, he was kind, and even vunerable when he asked you out, although still prefers to keep his emotions to himself.

- just a lil thing, but th Riddle family is RICH RICH so he is always buying you gifts even if you insist he shouldn't spend so much on you.

- when I say this guy would get a dog for you, I must make you understand how HUGE this is. He HATES dogs, so this is a huge thing for him. PLEASE APPRECIATE IT!!!

- would get into fights all the time (check out previous one shot No More Fights pleeeease x) over you, for you, and with you. If you got into a fight he'd be at the sidelines cheering you on like the supportive love he is >>>>

- nicknames. Oh my god, he has so many for you, muggle references are a speciality of his for some reason. Boojiboo, Darling, Angel, Princess, baby, and his person favourite: LOVE. Love this, love that, he uses it more than your actual name.

- he has reading glasses. he absolutely hates them, but you think they make him look cute and kinda smart (which he does, picture it, trust me)

- he reads a lot. Back at his house his room is next to their library so he can have easier access to it.

- he loves astrology. He knows all the constellations, the planets, and takes you on stargazing dates

- he smells like pinewood and fire. Just a really relaxing, wintery scent

- He HATES Summer. absolutely loves winter and autumn, but summer is just horrible to him. he hates the heat and bugs mostly, but he also hates the holidays because he's away from you and his friends

- went to a lot of pureblood balls/dances when he was young and is a very good dancer.

- doesn't have the closest relationship with Tom, who is two years older than him (same year as the Weasley twins), but he can go to Tom if he needs help with anything, whether it be homework to planned Arson :)

- he has a gorgeous morning voice. all gravely but still sounds beautiful

- he loves pretending to be asleep infront of you, and deliberately pretends to say your name in his sleep to see you smile when he "wakes up" and you tell him

- he's an early bird other than when he's really tired. If you wake up before him, you're not getting out of bed for hours, he's keeping you right there with him, hugging you tightly to him to prevent your escape. (not that you'd want to)

- if he sees you're nervous, he gives you his hand to fiddle with and you play with his fingers. if it doesn't help, he takes your hands in his and squeezes them gently.

- makes really good pancakes and waffles. He had them first at Theodore's house, and Theo's mum taught him how to make them.

- he's very good with kids, surprisingly. You once managed to snap a photo of him wearing a plastic tiara and now use it as leverage in arguments ;)

- he has big brother energy, and a lot of it. After the battle of Hogwarts, when Delphini was very little, he helped raise her to the best he could with help from Tom, the other Slytherins and Narcissa Malfoy. If you were comfortable with it, Delphini would be really close with you and see you as a big sister/brother/sibling <3 you guys would look after her and raise her to not carry out the events written in the cursed child.

- continuing with big brother stuff, he helps out the first years with homework and stuff when they need it.

- if people aren't listening when he's talking, he doesn't yell, just stops talking

- he's not agressive while drunk, like ever. Infact, total opposite. It. Is. Hilarious. He loosens up entirely. Trying to get you to ballroom dance with him, tripping over his feet. He'll go full on Shakira until you have to drag him out of the room. One time you gave him a hug while drunk but he didn't recognise you so he said "sorry, I have a girlfriend/boyfriend/partner" 😭 then realised it was you and pulled you back into the hug.

- he loves scary movies, naturally, but he's actually a sucker for a good rom com if it's actually good. I'm not talking boring predictable ones, genuinely good ones.

- if he was gen Z, he would be a huge marvel fan. don't try to convince me otherwise. not collecting merch and stuff, but seeing every movie within the week it comes out.

- before you two started dating he kept listening to Conan Gray (yes I'm a huge Conan fan so may be a little biased and I know conan was not singing then but anywayyyyy) his favourite song was Heather, because he didn't know if you reciprocated his feelings, but when you got together, he gave you his sweater on the third of December. I'm so proud of him.

- he's more of a cooker than a baker to be honest, he'd bake with you, but other than that he'd steer clear of sweet treats.

- he's fluent in French, Spanish and Italian as well as English. He wanted to learn Latin as well when he was younger, but didn't have time so is learning it now.

- he wears converse a lot. don't even argue with me please, I am right. (you can quote me on that to your family if needed guys)

- he loves photography and taking long walks in nature to get photos. If you were comfortable with it, he'd use you as his muse, styling you into his photos and capturing your beauty perfectly.

- DIMPLES

- He can play guitar. Simping.

- loves spicy food, literally obsessed with it.

- his biggest fear is getting the dark mark. he doesn't want anything to do with his father, and only took the name Riddle so as not to be an insult to rodolphus.

- anytime you say "I'm proud of you" he silently pulls you into a hug. he hasn't heard those words enough, so the fact that you have said it just completes him.

- drops anything for you if you need him.

- man child. he needs your attention at least five times a day.

- big spoon. You will never ever be big spoon, it is his role, he has assigned it to himself and is very protective of it.

[bambihrt]

HII HI

I love how you wrote Adam from hazbin hotel so I have a request! It is a little ANGSTY so if you don't want to do it it's okay!

Can you do Adam and his wife going to hell for extermination day and his wife saves him from nifty but also gets hurt by nifty?-

Sorry it's a little complicated I hope you have a good day!

thank you so much! i was listening to some sad music and let this get super angsty, i might come back and do a part 2 or an alternate ending later on

Dying was easy.

Waking up to the pearly gates and realizing you've been rewarded with heaven, made every decision in your life leading up to this moment worth it. You knew as long as you were a good person then good things would come to you. And the best thing you could ever hope for came in the shape of your husband Adam whom you met not long after entering heaven.

The angel was enamored the second he laid his eyes on you. Standing in line at the frozen yogurt shop while biting your lip and scanning the menu. You were the the most beautiful woman he's ever seen and being the first man, he'd seen a lot of women. He abandoned whatever Lute was saying to him and made his way over to you to strike up a conversation.

You two quickly formed a deep and intimate relationship. 'I love you's were all the other residents of heaven could hear when seeing the couple out. Over time you made your way up to being an exorcist as Adam hated parting with you for even a day. He couldn't think on the job properly as he'd count down the time until he got to see you again.

Though you didn't completely agree with extermination, this opinion was never voiced with your husband as you didn't see the conflict necessary. But this upcoming extermination day was worrying you. Of course, your husband being the man he is, had made an enemy of the princess of hell. As powerful as he may be and as nice as the girl was when you met her, you knew when push came to shove she'd have a lot better chance of winning a fight than he did. Your only peace of mind was that angels couldn't be killed. At the back of your mind you couldn't help but wonder 'what if they can be?'

You watched from afar while you were battling a hellborn, your husband fighting Lucifer, king of hell himself. The anxiety and pit in your stomach worsened the moment you saw one of your own go down. The second your husband met the ground, your instincts kicked in. While his back was turned in a rant, you watched a small red-headed girl make her way over. Your ears rang as you flew as fast as you can to push the love of your immortal life out of the way.

Your noble decisions seemed to still be giving you good luck as you had managed to save your Adam. Your presence drew the attention of everyone nearby. Seeing your lover's face look at your own brought you a smile. As you tried to speak to him you started to choke up. Coughing up gold liquid into your hand, you came to the same conclusion as when you had first become immortal. Dying was easy.

Black dots started to close around your vision and you fell to your knees. Your husband's arms caught you before you could fall onto your face. His face was horror-stricken. You tried to reach out to caress his cheek but you were too weak to make it. The wind lulled you to rest as he shot up to heaven's portal with you in his arms. The last thing you saw before your vision went black was Adam's face yelling out to you though you couldn't hear it.

[bones4thecats]

Hii!

I love your work and I was wondering if I could request platonic Baul and Sebek with an oc insert, Alcestris? (oc info x (the second one) & x that is adoptive family (Baul's daughter and Sebek's aunt but it can go in sibling reader)

If not I'll just ask for a simple reader <33

If you need any more info on the oc just tell me ^^

Baul Zigvolt Adopting The Fae! Reader

Characters: Baul and Sebek Zigvolt (separate) Requester: @althea-and-alcestris A/N: I decided to just do a plain reader, also this is most definitely not my best piece, but I tried my best with the info given. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this! ⚠️ Spoilers/Trigger Warnings for: Mentions of abandonment and war ⚠️ (P.S: The Reader is themed after the Tundra Fey from Maleficent: Mistress of Evil)

╔══════════════════════════════════════════╗

╚═════ Baul Zigvolt ════════════════════════════╝

🐊 It was a mere few months after the Human and Fae war had ended, and it was obvious that, despite what the elder had said, Baul was traumatized from the constant bloodshed

🐊 Ever since it ended, he had begun taking small walks in the woods nearby to calm himself down from the memories of losing the young and old. From his childhood friends to even the ones that barely scraped 150 years old

🐊 During one of these late walks, he heard the cracking and squashes of sticks and wet leaves coming from ahead of him. And, in true warrior fashion, he gripped his weapon and stalked his way towards the noise silently

"I'm so sorry, my baby..." A female's voice said through the trees as the Fae came closer.

"Who goes there?!" He yelled, making the woman stand abruptly and begin running away as fast as her speed and legs could take her.

🐊 Baul began to run after her, but stopped when the curiosity of what she left there took over. So, he turned around and sprinted back to where she once kneeled. And when he looked down, he was shocked

🐊 A young Fae was there, wrapped up in a tiny periwinkle-colored blanket, it was fairly faded with your bright colors. Your small white and black horns were a tell-tale sign of your heritage, but what was more of a sore thumb was your high-levels of paleness, you were far brighter toned than other Faes nearby

🐊 You had to be a Tundra Fae, which was odd. That sub-species was very hard to come across, since they were seen to make up a large section of most first-fighting armies, meaning they passed far faster than other kinds

🐊 Baul kneeled down and looked at you with a glossing of despair in his eyes, who in the name of Twisted Wonderland would leave such a vulnerable Fae, nonetheless one that couldn't be that much older than a few years. Perhaps around a few months in human terms

🐊 Instead of leaving the youngling in the woods or leaving it at the nearby orphanage, Baul looked into the tiny (E/C) eyes that faded into black and smiled gently. You reminded him of his daughter when she was a baby, with such innocence in her eyes. Maybe raising another wouldn't be so bad...

╔══════════════════════════════════════════╗

╚═════ Sebek Zigvolt ═══════════════════════════╝

⚡ Sebek has admired you for the 16 years that he has been alive. From the way you defended your family if offended in any way to the way you seemingly got along with everyone that you met, it was all just amazing to witness

⚡ He hates himself for his human half, so having a family member that can sit by his side and speak of how they felt knowing that they were far from related to the people once considered family, it was nice to know that not only he felt like the oddball in the family to his Grandfather

⚡ Speaking of his Grandfather, as his adoptive child, you were held in very high regards by others. From his now-deceased wife, to his biological daughter, her human-husband, and their shared children, you were always beloved. Especially when he had first brought you home all those years ago

⚡ You were also fairly young for Fae, reaching at 170 years old. In human terms, you would be around 17. With such youth, you grew up being babysat by your older sister and father's best friend, Lilia Vanrouge, who adored you to pieces

⚡ Since you were so young, Sebek, whom was your technical nephew, was shocked to see just how close you got to his 'Wakasama'. It was not like he was to yell at you like he did others, you were his family, nonetheless his aunt/uncle, he respected you highly

⚡ But, every time he saw you laugh freely with Malleus, he couldn't help but wonder if you did have some kind of special bone with the future ruler of Briar Valley

⚡ As you grew up and helped raise Sebek well, you understood how he thought far better than other people in your family. You would sit by him almost every night and let him relax alongside you, inviting the others like Malleus, Lilia, Silver, maybe even the new magicless human from time to time for extra companionship

⚡ Sebek also protects you the same way he does Malleus. Anytime he sees/hears someone disrespect you, he yells at full volume about how 'repulsive' and 'self-hating' they must be. One time, he had found a Diasomnia third-year speaking about how you must be using your title to get you through College, and oh boy did he regret saying that

⚡ He had told Lilia about the words, leading the elder Fae to grit his teeth in a smile before telling his son and son-figure to get ready for a small interrogation, War Style

⚡ He also enjoys to see you train against others. You were raised by a former soldier, so fighting was in your 'blood', in a way. The way you gripped a spear and readied yourself whilst kicking away and dodging every upcoming hit coming from your uncle figure just made stars appear in your nephew's eyes

[silassinclair]

It’s my first time requesting, so I’m sorry if you don’t understand my bad english ;-;

May I request a GN readerx Yandere Wild West Outlaw (my brain can’t remember his name) with a reader who sleeps anywhere on anything? There will be one time this man has seen his darling somehow out of the ropes and is sleeping on the roof.

I understand if you don’t wanna do this request, but if you do it thank you from the bottom of my heart! <3

Always take care and take a break when needed~

This request is so silly I have to do it. Also your english is great, don’t sweat it!!

Yandere Wild West Outlaw x Sleepy Reader

CW// Nothing, just wholesomeness

Masterlist

It’s yours and Maddox’s first night together after he took you from your home. You two are camping out in the desert by a cave. There’s a small fire lit and Maddox’s horse Jasper is munching on some carrots.

But it’s been awfully quiet, the outlaw thinks. Why is it so quiet?

He realizes it’s because of you! You’re usually always thrashing and screaming at him and now you aren’t!

He also realizes that you’re no where to be found… It makes him panic slightly. He shoots up from where he’s sat and he looks around the camp. The desert is dangerous, what if you got stung by a scorpion or bit by a rattlesnake!?

“You come out from where you’re hidin’ missy! Or I outta shoot-”

He nearly trips and falls flat on his face. Looking down he sees you taking a dirt nap, quite literally in the dirt. How did you get so far away from camp? Did you sleep walk? Fall asleep while trying to escape? Whatever it is Maddox doesn’t give a damn, he’s glad he found you.

“You’re a dumb little thing. What would you do without me?”

From this moment onward Maddox sees a repeating pattern. You sleep anytime, anywhere. And on occasion you can even “teleport”. He thought about calling a priest to perform an exorcism on you once.

“Sweet Jesus, this ain’t possible… How’d ya get out here!?”

When you fall asleep while on his horse he sits you in front of him so he can act as a back rest. He doesn’t want you falling off now.

Loves it when you fall asleep on him. You’re so vulnerable when you’re asleep like this. He can touch you without getting yelled at or smacked. So he takes advantage of it.

Combs his hands through your pretty locks of hair and caresses your plush cheeks. Sometimes when you squirm in your sleep from a nightmare he shushes you like a baby and rocks you back and forth.

Stays by your side from now on when you’re asleep after… the incident.

The Incident:

After over a week of being on horseback and foot Maddox finds an old house for them to settle in temporarily. It’s a cute house with victorian architecture. It’s definitely abandoned and all the owner’s belongings are still there. They most likely fled due to the Native American tribe near by but Maddox isn’t afraid of them. He actually gets along with the tribesmen better than the whites who hate him for being half American and half Mexican.

“This place is nice. It almost the same size as my old home.” Y/n mutters as she admires the decor. But her eyes feel heavy, she needs to sleep. This past week has been exhausting.

Maddox notices how worn out she is. She’ll be no good to him if she’s a mopey, tired slug. So he brings her upstairs to the main bedroom. The bed is dusty but it’ll have to make do.

“You’ll sleep here sweetheart. But I’m gonna have to tie ya’ down. I don’t need ya’ escaping now.” Maddox ties a rope from the bed post to her ankle.

Y/n doesn’t even bother to yell or fight back from being tied down. She just falls asleep immediately like a hibernating bear. When she’s asleep Maddox unpacks some supplies down in the living room. He also cooks up a can of beans and digs in.

It’s quiet. All his life he’s been alone, but he’ll never admit he feels lonely. He’s never had anyone to trust or rely on. Most nights he’ll sleep under the stars and talk to Jasper. But he’s a horse so talking to him is one sided.

Even though Y/n is sleeping just upstairs he misses her. Misses her snarky comments, creative insults, and the way she smacks his chest when he gets too close.

“What are you doing to me woman..” The outlaw mutters to himself as he trudges himself up the creaky wooden stairs. He’s in front of her door and he opens it slowly, peeking his head in. But then he slams it open when he sees she’s gone.

“Y/n?” He shouts, looking around the room and searching every corner. She’s missing again! Maddox runs like a cat out of water as he searches the whole house. What if she got hurt!? He could never live with himself.

He kicks open the front door and looks around the property. What if the tribe found her and thought she was a threat? Every negative outcome of what could happen to her comes to his mind. Getting eaten by a coyote is a possibility too.

Maddox takes his hat off and grips his black hair.

“FUCK!” He shouts and kicks the dirt on the ground, the cloud of brown blowing with the wind. Maddox walks back to the house in defeat where he tells Jasper that Y/n’s gone, and she is never coming back. But the horse only exhales loudly and shakes his head back and forth.

“She’s gone buddy. I know you liked her but she’s probably dead in a fuckin’ ditch somewhere!” The man snaps.

Jasper slams his front leg down and neighs loudly. His nose is pointed up towards the house.

“What are ya’ on about you?” Jasper never behaved like this before unless he wanted to try and tell him something. He’s a smart horse, so any sound or motion me makes is usually when he tries to convey a message.

Maddox looks up at the house where Jasper is looking and squints his eyes. He puts his hat back on to cover his eyes from the beating sun. Looking closer he sees a familiar head of h/c hair on the roof!

“Y/n!?” Maddox says in disbelief. How the fuck did she get up there!? Does she even know she’s up there? Probably not.

“Shit boy, what do we do?” He turns to his horse. Jasper neighs louder and Maddox looks back up and sees that she’s about to fall off the roof!

“SHIT!”

Y/n turns in her sleep and falls off the roof. Maddox feels his heart drop and he breaks off into a sprint. Just before she hits the ground he catches her, making them both fall to the dirt.

“Y-You?” Y/n wakes up and sees she’s outside and that god forsaken outlaw is beneath her. His head is under her dress making her squeal and scramble away.

“W-What in the hell!? What do you think you’re doing? Why am I outside and why was your ugly mug up my dress!?”

Maddox groans and rubs his head. He turns to her with a glare and grabs her wrist, pulling her up.

“I ain’t ever takin’ my eye off you again! You ought to be a witch or somethin’!”

From that moment onward Maddox sleeps next to Y/n in a bone crushing cuddle. When he feels her move in the slightest he wakes up and tightens his hold. No way in hell will he let something like that happen again.

[swiftieblyth]

Baby Cameron: Da-ah

warnings- warnings- obx stuff, Rafe, WARD (hate him), child abandonment (not from Rafe), single dad Rafe, let me know what else I’m sure there’s more.

“Man, that party was insane!” Topper chuckled as he was out golfing with Rafe, Wovey tucked in his arms as they walked to the tee. “I mean my first thought when I did that line was… ‘Bro, do we have enough?’ It was crazy!”

“I know, right,” Rafe agreed, looking down at the field, then to Wovey who was watching him with big eyes in her uncles arms. “Wish Daddy good luck, baby,” Rafe smiled at the belly laughs Wovey was letting out as he tickled her stomach.

“Hey, you, uh…” Top started, readjusting Wovey in his arms as Rafe got ready to swing. “You didn’t tell Sarah, did you?”

“Are you kidding me, man? The way she runs her mouth? Hell, no. Whoo!” Rafe let out as the ball went flying into the next field.

“Hey!” The old man yelled. “Come on, now!”

“Shut up!” Rafe ordered, looking back to Top. “Shouldn’t be taking so long, anyway.”

“Bleh!” Wovey exclaimed, sticking her cute little tongue out.

“That’s right baby,” Rafe cooed, taking her back into his arms as she clung to him. “You tell the old man. Whoa, whoa, whoa.”

“Hey what?” Top asked, following Rafe’s eyes to find Pope walking up.

“I don’t think he’s a member.”

“It’s fine, just — just let him go. All right, let’s, uh… let’s go get your ball. Come on.”

“They put a gun to your head, bro.”

“That’s fine. It’s fine. Let’s go.” Top started, but Rafe started walking away. “Hey, Rafe. Rafe! Let’s get your ball, man.”

“Stay right here, okay, baby?” Rafe whispered, putting Wovey down on a soft patch of sand, close by, but out of view for her to see him. “Daddy’s gonna be right back. But I’ll be able to see you the whole time.” He explained, then made his way over to Pope. “Hey, what’s up? Hey, how much for one of those beers?”

“They’re not for sale.”

“Oh, wait, wait, wait.” Rafe drug out, putting his club to Pope’s chest. “You can just give us one, then, right?”

“Or you can order one, like everybody else,” Pope explained, looking from Rafe to Topper.

“Listen,” Rafe chuckled, grabbing Pope’s shoulder. “Wait, wait, wait. You’re not listening to me. Um… You’ve got so many, bro, and we’ve got nothing.”

“Nothing’.” Topper agreed.

“Nee!” Wovey cheered, commando crawling over to them. Rafe smiled at her cuteness and went to pick her up. “That’s right baby, but you gotta stay here for now,” Rafe kissed her head then put her back down.

“They’re not mine,” Pope tried to explain. “They’re already paid for.”

“Already paid for?” Rafe asked, bending down and digging into the sack. “What the hell? You probably stole ‘em, right?” Rafe asked, ripping the sack with his club, making everything crash to the ground.

“What the hell? You owe me for that!” Poor yelled.

“Oh,” Rafe let out, storming up to him. “Dude, I don’t owe you crap, Pogue.”

“Buy your own crap!” Pope yelled, pushing Rafe.

“Hey. Come on, man!” Topper cut in, fighting with Pope over the beers. “We just want one of these beers!”

“You guys are freaking crazy!” Pope yelled.

“Give us a beer, man!” Topper managed to yank the beers out of Pope’s grip, making Pope fall and roll on the ground.

Pope got up and tried to punch Topper but Rafe quickly started hitting him with his club.

“Hey! Rafe, Rafe! Come on, man!” Topper yelled.

“Stay down,” Rafe yelled to Pope, who was now laying on the ground, bleeding and gasping for air.

“Hey, let’s go!” Topper ordered. “Let’s go, man!”

“What, man?”

“Knock it off, Rafe! Come on! Seriously. Rafe!” Topper ordered, as Rafe yelled and slammed his club on the ground. And bent down and talked to Pope, then made his way back to Wovey.

“Dah-ah!” Wovey cheered when she saw her daddy coming back.

Rafe felt everything stop at the sound, pride flooding his heart at what he thought he just heard. “Top! Topper, come here!” He yelled, picking her up.

“What? What is it man?” Topper yelled, running up to them.

“Say it again, baby. Say it for Uncle Top!”

“Dah-ah!” Wovey cheered, clapping her hands.

“Did she just?” Topper stuttered, shock filling his mind.

“My baby just said her first word!” Rafe cheered, tossing Wovey in the air a bit and catching her, making her squeal in delight. Her chubby arms clapped as she laughed as Rafe tossed her up again.

“Dah-ah!” Wovey laughed, clinging to his shirt, as Rafe caught her back in his arms.

“That’s right, baby. It’s Da-da.” Rafe smiled, tears forming in his eyes. “I’m so proud of you baby girl. I love you so very much!”

[behidethetrees]

LOVE IS ONLY A FEELING.

IN WHICH… You have a bittersweet reunion.

Pairing: Coriolanus snow x Fem! reader

Content: Ooc! Coryo (he's not evil), Covey! reader, They're definitely a situationship, Possessive! Coriolanus, 1.3k words. Requests

You were greeted with Loud clapping and cheering once you finished your original song at the nightclub. It wasn't often that people would stop dancing to take in someone's beautiful words, But everyone did for you. You thanked everyone and stepped down from the stage to get some water when suddenly a brunette boy walked over to you and asked for a dance. Of course, you agreed.

It had been months since you’d seen Coriolanus snow. He had gotten in a fight with your ex, As he was swinging, he accidentally hit one of the covey members with his backhand. You yelled at Coriolanus so much you were surprised your vocal cords were still intact. He never apologized. He never came back after you kicked him out. He had left you for months with bitterness and anger, But you couldn't hold onto that forever. You were done with Coriolanus snow.

The brunette boy was slightly taller than you and he danced well enough. Though His hands were sweaty and he messed up his foot placement every now and then. As you danced with him, Your long white skirt swaying, A drop of temperature in the room occurred, You knew right away that only one man could make a room feel cold. Coriolanus snow. The man that you were so hopelessly in love with but hated every inch of, Stood in the back of the room with a clenched jaw and eyes that could pierce anyone. All you could do was roll your own pair and abandon the boy you didn't even know the name of. 

The covey band was singing one of your songs And Coriolanus immediately recognized it. It was the one you sang to him the first time you showed him the big wildflower field one summer night. He had thought back to when you held each other under that green and yellow leaf tree. When he finally found you on the side of the stairs leading to the stage, Coriolanus swept you off your feet, Like he always did.

His strong arm gripped your waist tightly but he held your hand gently. You were close enough to smell him, he smelt just like roses. You had started to notice actually how nice he looked. He wore a black suit with a red shirt under and his curly outgrown hair was combed back. Was he dressed up for someone else, Or you?

You looked up at him Through your curled lashes, Your eyes were pure, as snow he thought. His upper lip slightly lifted into a small smirk. As the covey band continued, Coriolanus began to move your body with his slowly. Coriolanus liked you better like this. When you were hidden away in his hold, When you struggled to hate his touch, When he knows he's got you.

“Did you miss me sweetheart?” Coriolanus says with that sickly sweet smile. His tone was arrogant like he had no doubts.

“Not one bit.” You gripe back at him. You had missed him. Sitting by the lake only you two knew as you sang and he’d listen, Late night walks while his muscular arms kept you safe from any harm, The feeling of his hands. How rough and slim they were, You’d wonder who else's blood had fallen on them.

“Well, that's a shame because I missed you.” Coriolanus wasn't lying. He missed a certain girl waltzing around with long dresses and feathers in her hair, Those love songs she’d sing to him as she traced flowers in Coriolanus’s palm with her little finger, the security and comfort her aura provided him. 

“Then why didn't you come back?” You ask him. You can tell that hit a nerve by the way he swung you to the right harshly, then returned to slowly swaying side by side. Coriolanus didn't have a reason nor an excuse. He, who was so defensive, never apologized for anything. He just sighed.

“I waited for you Coriolanus.” You couldn't help the tears starting to form in your eyes. Every night you left your window open and a key under the mat. Waiting, listening, Hoping he would come back. Something about you calling him ‘Coriolanus’ disappointed him to his core. He felt his girl slipping from his grasp. He felt the only thing that had ever belonged to him was disappearing. 

It wasn't just your kindness and easily persuaded mind that Coriolanus liked. It was the way your big, curious eyes looked at his unforgiving blue ones like he was more than a poor capitol boy trying to carry on his family name. Like he had the chance to be someone to somebody.

He slowly stopped the movement of your bodies. “Look at me.”  Coriolanus was now gently cupping the sides of your jaw with both hands, Forcing you to look at him. You searched for something in him. The guilt in his eyebrows, the reassurance in his eyes, and the slight resentment he had towards you in his lips.

“I'm here now. And I'm so, so sorry I hurt you. I will make this right, you just have to let me, please.” Coriolanus Begged. You had Coriolanus Snow, One of the most intimidating boys in the capitol, Begging for a way back into your life. His forehead touched yours while he delicately wiped away your tears with his thumb.

His big arms eventually hugged your waist. He buried his head into your shoulder, taking in the scent of you that he was addicted to. You felt so close to Coriolanus, so vulnerable. You placed your arms around his neck. The warmth of your bodies rose, That feeling you both had been chasing since that night.

A few minutes went by as the covey continued to play. You felt the rise and fall of Coriolanus’s chest, His steady heartbeat thumping against his insides. Coriolanus picked his head up to say something. Coriolanus thought for a minute, His lips drawing together. No, he couldn't say that. he couldn’t tell her why he didn’t want to love her. That she’d be the only thing above him, the only weakness people could dangle over his head. That she would have the power Coriolanus so desperately wanted. But if he told her, He’d have to live with that for the rest of his life. The guilt would hurt him no matter how hard he would try not to feel. The regret would build up in his stomach but Worst of all, his jealousy would seethe through his veins and kill him.

The cold sensation of his hands on your jaw and neck swirled into your skin and down to your heart. He took a moment to look across all your features before he put his lip onto yours. It was passionate and long. He never pulled away because he wanted this so bad. he wanted you so bad. to have all of you to himself. his hands gripped tighter on you. His lips pressed harder onto yours. He hated that others were around while you shared this intimate moment. He hated that others were around you.

Coriolanus’s thoughts started wandering into the darkest parts of his brain. He kept his composure. He didn't want to scare you away with his mind because he didn't think he'd survive if he lost you again.

After you pulled away, he gave you a quick smile and guided your head back to his chest as he wrapped himself around you again. His chin rested on top of your soft hair. The lights glistened as you closed your eyes, Listening to a mix of the covey and his heartbeat. Sweet moments of Coriolanus kissing your hair and whispering sweet words blurred together. Coriolanus’s presence sent you in a state of euphoria.

Coriolanus knew it wasn’t over. He knew you, better than you knew yourself. You’d always come back to him and he’d do the same. You were his. This was a never ending story of you two. Coriolanus smiled. He got his girl back.

A/N: srry ive been gone writers block sucks. Anyways hope u enjoyed :3

Requests

[daddyslilchickenfingers2]

Kinktober (reuploaded)

Jealousy (Chris)

Request: y/n’s been flirting with dudes at a party and chris likes her so gets really possessive and spanks her when she says she loves his big hands on her body and she makes a mess all over his thigh + just a full fic of chris fucking reader doggy style (like i just know that man LOVES doggy) —> or maybe even like times where chris fucked u doggy like the one time u guys did it in front of a mirror, the one time he bend u over the couch etc

Warnings: spanking, doggy style, jealous Chris, slight angst, fighting, daddy kink

Chris’ pov

I really had no right to be jealous, it’s not like Y/n is my girlfriend, she’s my best friend. My kind, beautiful, funny, sexy, and single best friend. Plus it’s a party, all the single people were dancing and grinding on each other, overall having a great time. Well, everyone but me. I stood there in the corner, tightly gripping onto my near-empty Pepsi can as I watched her from across the room. Swaying her hips to the song with some random guy behind her, he was staring at her curves that her dress perfectly showed. I couldn’t take it anymore, I hate seeing her with other guys, especially ones we don’t know. I abandoned my now empty Pepsi can and made my way onto the dance floor to get Y/n. I was going to take her home since were only a few blocks away from her house, we needed to talk. As I approached her and the guy, I noticed his hands were now on her hips, trying to pull her back against him and I got even more angry.

Y/n’s pov

I was at a random influencers house party that was only a couple blocks away from my house just hanging out and dancing when some guy asked if I’d dance with him. He was honestly pretty cute so I obviously said yes, even as the songs got more sexual. I felt his hands on my hips and I was going to start grinding on him because a girls gotta have some fun, but before I could, I felt him get pushed off of me. I turned around to be face-to-face with my best friend. “Chris! What the fuck are you doing!?” I yelled at him over the music. I watched as the guy, whose name I didn’t catch, stumbled back towards Chris, looking ready to fight. He was definitely drunk, but me and Chris were completely sober as we don’t drink or smoke. Instead of causing a scene, Chris just grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the door. He was walking incredibly fast and I could barely keep up with him due to my heels. “Chris, slow down! Where are we going!?” I yelled at him once again, completely unaware of what was happening.

“Shut up we’re going home! C’mon, it’s cold out here you’re going to get sick” he said pulling me faster until I yanked my arm away and stopped. “What the fuck is your problem Chris!? I was having a good time in there!” I yelled again, getting frustrated. “Would you stop fucking yelling! Jesus Christ, let’s go!” he slightly raised his voice, getting irritated. “Not until you tell me what’s going on!” I said sternly. We were only about a block and a half away from my house at this point but I still wanted to know why he pulled me away from the party and why he was so angry. “I’ll tell you when we get to your house! Now are you going to walk like a fucking adult or do I need to carry you?” he asked in a condescending tone, making me feel small. “Fuck you Christopher! Don’t fucking talk to me you asshole!” I yelled, harshly shoving him. After that, I just started walking as fast as I could towards my house, trying not to cry.

I don’t know what’s going on or why he’s acting like this but I don’t like it, this isn’t my Chris. I could hear his footsteps getting increasingly louder from behind me as he ran to catch up with me while I held onto myself, trying to keep warm in the crisp night air. I could hear Chris’ heavy breathing and footsteps right behind me now, as he stood there processing what happened after I shoved him. “Y/n! Y/n, wait! I’m sorry, I’m an asshole, I know! Just let me explain!” he tried pleading with me. We got to my door and I put the code in to unlock it, standing in the doorway and looking at him furiously. “Explain what!? That you’re fucking possessive and can never let me have fucking fun if it involves another guy!? Just fuck off Chris, go home, I’m done with you!” I screamed, letting my anger get the best of me as I slammed the door in his face. I took off my shoes and sat on the couch before I started crying. Thank god I was only really wearing waterproof mascara and some powder on my face, otherwise I’d look like a wreck.

Chris’ pov

I fucked up… I knew that the second she pushed me, I had gone too far. I can’t help it, when it comes to her, I lose the ability to communicate my emotions and just fuck everything up. I just wanted to explain where I was coming from but she slammed the door in my face. She slammed it so hard that her neighbor, an older, gay gentleman in his late 40s, came out to make sure everything was okay. “Christopher? What happened, is Y/n okay?” he asked, relieved to see me outside the door and not some random creep. “I fucked up Rick, I fucked up so bad and I think I might’ve just lost my best friend” I told him before explaining everything that happened. He put his hand on my shoulder and smiled a bit, “Sounds like you’re in love kid. I want you to go in there and make things right, go tell her why you did what you did, and express your feelings. If I know Y/n, she’s in there scared to death of losing you, she loves you more than you know. Go fix the shit you fucked up” he told me.

I was a bit confused as to what he meant by the second to last sentence, but I thanked him anyways. “Thanks Rick, hopefully I can fix this” I said while shaking his hand. “You got this, good luck kid” he replied as he walked back inside. I took a deep breath before putting the code in and opening the door. I immediately felt like shit as Y/n was crying on FaceTime with Madi, who didn’t go to the party. “Y/n/n…” I tried slowly, Madi heard me and said “I’m gonna hang up now, just hear him out and remember what I told you.“ before yelling “You better fucking fix this Chris!” through the phone. Y/n let out a shaky breath, looking at me with tear filled eyes. I move to sit on the couch with her, keeping my distance. “Before you say anything, let me explain. You’re right, I am possessive over you and I don’t like seeing you with other guys, but it’s because I’m fucking in love with you…” I looked up to see no emotion on her face so I let out a shaky breath and continued.

“I fucked up, I know that. I’m not very good at expressing my emotions when I’m jealous, I just know I don’t want you to be with another guy. I-I want you to be with me. It’s stupid, I get it, and I should’ve just talked to you instead of dragging you down the street. I’m really, really sorry. And I’m sorry I’m in love with you” I explained, knowing I probably sound fucking pathetic. I didn’t dare look up at her, scared of rejection and/or causing her more pain. I did, however, look up at her when I heard her quietly say, “I’m not” “What?” I asked confused. She scooted closer to me, “I’m not sorry that you’re in love with me, because it makes it a lot easier to do this” she said before she cupped both sides of my face and kissed me, hard. She kissed me until we were out of breath and forced to pull away. The next thing that came out of her mouth shocked me and sent a shiver down my spine. “I deserve a punishment for not hearing you out and purposely making you jealous, don’t ya think?” she asked seductively, her innocent big y/e/c eyes looking up at me. “W-What?” I asked, wanting to make sure I heard her right, “I think I’ve been bad and deserve to be punished” she teased.

Y/n’s pov

I don’t know why I said what I did, but I was horny and frustrated so it just came out. I looked Chris up and down as he bit his lip, watching his cock slowly grow hard in his pants. I could see the gears in his head turning, trying to figure out if I was fucking with him or not. I was feeling a bit bold and loved the idea of Chris’ big, rough hands on my body, so I leaned it his ear. “Come spank me daddy, I’ve been a bad girl” I whispered before going upstairs to my room. Chris quickly followed behind me, pushing me up against the wall before I got the chance to get on my bed. His hand came up to wrap around my throat, “You’re a little slut aren’t you? Making me jealous on purpose and practically begging me to punish you, how pathetic!” he smirked. I let out a whine after he said that, just wanting to be touched already. “Go get undressed for me baby” he said in a softer tone, pulling away to discard his own shirt and pants.

I quickly got fully naked before shuffling over to Chris, who was sitting on the edge of my bed in his boxers. “So pretty” he muttered as he moved to sit against my headboard. “C’mon, lay across my lap for me” I did as he said and he moved me so my ass was over his lap. “H-How many am I getting daddy?” I asked nervously as Chris rubbed his hands over my ass. “I was gonna do 50, but you’re being a good girl so I’m gonna lower it to 30, and I want you to count. You’re getting 15 each cheek baby” he replied making me whine. Chris started off with soft slaps “One… two… three… four… f-five…” but they quickly grew harder, the sound of each slap getting louder as I felt myself getting wetter. Every time his hand would come in contact with my ass, it would jerk me forward a bit, causing my clit to rub across his hard cock. “nineteen… twe—nty… twenty o-one… tw-twenty two-o…” I managed to count through my moans, however, once I got to twenty-eight, I felt myself unintentionally cum.

I let out an extremely loud moan as I finished counting “t-thirty” I whispered out, my ass now sore and most definitely welted and red. Chris spread my legs a little, rubbing his fingers across my cum covered cunt. “I don’t remember saying you could cum baby” he said seriously, flipping me over so I was now laying with my back against the bed. Chris immediately hovered over me, “You didn’t even ask” he continued, “I didn’t mean to daddy, it was an accident. Never done that before” I squirmed as he stared down at me. “I believe you babe, but if you cum again without permission, daddy’s gonna have to punish you some more” he stated gruffly. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down so we could makeout, Chris quickly won dominance and started to suck on my tongue before softly biting my lip. I honestly didn’t know Chris would be THIS good of a kisser, he ran his tongue across the roof of my mouth. I shuddered and let out a moan as one hand came up to toy with my nipples, whining when he pulled away.

“Remember how you called me possessive earlier? Well I’m gonna be really possessive now and mark you up so everyone knows you belong to me” he growled before harshly biting hickies into my neck, running his tongue across and sucking on them afterwards. I knew these were going to be dark and would take at least a week to go away but I also really liked the thought of everyone seeing how marked up I was from my daddy. Chris pulled away to admire his work and when he did, I asked in a shy voice, “Can I give you some hickies to daddy? Don’t want other girls to look at you” I pouted a bit. Chris nodded and let me suck a few hickies into his neck as he started slowly pumping two fingers into me, quickly adding a third to stretch me out. Once he deemed me loose enough he pulled me away from his neck by my hair, sitting on his knees to take off his boxer. “I want you on your hands and knees, facing the mirror so you can watch yourself getting fucked like a slut” he ordered, I immediately obeyed, loving the thought of watching it through the mirror that was close to my bed.

I watched as Chris spit onto his cock, stroking it a few times before lining it up with my hole. “Ready to get fucked like a cheap whore?” he asked, slightly kneading my ass with one hand. “Please daddy, please fuck me!” I begged before he slammed his full length into me, giving me no time to adjust before he started pounding into me. Chris pulled my hair back so I could see myself being fucked, and it was pretty fucking hot. I was trying my hardest to keep my eyes open but it felt so good and I just couldn’t. “Keep your eyes open slut!” Chris growled, pulling my hair harder, making me whimper and whine from the pain. “C-Can’t! It feels too good, please!” I don’t even know what I was asking for, “Please what baby? You need to use your words for me to know what you want” he said softer. “Need to close my eyes, want my face shoved into the mattress” I pathetically moaned out, causing Chris to let go of my hair and push my head down, making my back arch more.

“You’re doing so good for me, I think your punishment should be over and I should just fuck my pretty girl, don’t you agree?” he asked while moaning. “Wanna be good girl, I’ll do whatever you tell me daddy!” I moaned out as I felt myself getting close, that moan was quickly replaced with a cry when Chris pulled out. “No! No daddy! Was so close!” I said as literal tears welled up in my eyes, but Chris just rolled me onto my back, causing me to wince as my ass hit the bed. “Hey, it’s okay sweetheart. I’m not done fucking you, I just wanted to see that pretty face” he said calmly, stroking my cheek to reassure me. Chris slid back in and went back to his fast pace, moving my legs to wrap around his waist before caging in my head with his arms. “Feel so good daddy! Like this way better, I can see your face” I whined which made Chris smile. “Yeah? Me too, I like seeing the pretty faces you make” he said, making me blush as my nails started to lightly scratch down his back as I got close again. “Can I please cum? You can cum in me!” I whimpered out as I was holding back my orgasm, Chris’ lips came down on mine in a long and deeply passionate kiss.

He only pulled away to speed up his thrusts, “Go ahead princess, cum on my cock, I’m not far behind” he groaned. With his permission, I came, moaning out his name as I did so, “Oh Chris! Shit, feels so good” I moaned loudly. “Fuck! My name sounds so pretty coming out of your mouth like that” he grunted, thrusting in a few more times before cumming inside of me. Chris pulled out but used his fingers to scoop up the cum dripping out of me and bringing them to my mouth. “Suck” he instructed me before grabbing his shirt and wiping off both his dick and my cunt, ridding them of any excess cum. Chris turned off the light while I pulled the blankets back and we crawled under them, I put my hand on Chris’ cheek and turned his face to capture his lips in a feverish kiss. I swear my heart melted a bit when I felt him smile into it before pulling away, “I love you so much, and I’m sorry I acted like a bitch” I said quietly. Chris kissed my forehead, “And I’m sorry for being such an asshole. I love you so much more by the way” he said back, “Cuddles?” I questioned sleepily as I rolled onto my side. “Cuddles” he laughed, doing the same and spooning me, holding me against him tightly as we drifted off to sleep.

All work is subject to copyright

©️ Daddyslilchickenfingers2 2023

Do not steal my work

[eleventhdoctorsangel]

Never wanted you to hate me

I could feel my heart in my throat as I looked around to see that I was back at the big top. I looked down and I was still wearing the outfit that Buggy had me wear. “Luffy! Nami! Zoro!” I yelled. “Their gone sweetheart.” Buggy said as he walked out of the shadows. “They wouldn’t do that. Zoro wouldn’t do that to me.” I said. “Who do you think was the one to suggest leaving you.” Buggy said. “You’re lying.” I said. Buggy came over to me putting a hand on my cheek and started to stork it with his thumb. I slapped it away and made a run for it out of the big top. But as soon as I ran out I was back in. So I tried again but just kept coming back inside of the big top. “You can do that all day sweetheart but you’ll never get anywhere but right here with me.” Buggy said. “I don’t want to be here with you I want to be with my friends.” I said. “Some friends they are they abandoned you. They left you.” Buggy said. “Shut up.” I said. “They’re glad that they left you. How long do you think it would have been before they decided leave you here. Come on sweetheart think about look what rubber boy can do, your so called protector fights with three swords, that girl with the tangerine hair is the navigator. What did you bring to that team sweetheart. You were nothing but a liability to them.” Buggy said. “Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” I yelled as I put my hands over my ears falling to the ground crying.

I felt hands gently remove mine from over my ears. But my eyes were still fixated on the ground. “Sweetheart I want you to look at me.” Buggy said. But I didn’t listen. “Sweetheart please I would like to see those beautiful eyes of yours.” Buggy said. As tears rolled down my face I looked up at Buggy. Buggy put his hands on my face wiping away my tears with his thumbs. “Don’t waste your tears over them sweetheart they don’t deserve them.” Buggy said. “Why wasn’t I enough for them?” I asked. “You were too good for them it was them that wasn’t enough to have someone like you to be a part of their crew. My crew and I will never make you feel like that. We will never make you feel like a liability.” Buggy said. I just collapsed into his chest crying and clinging on to him as if my life depended on it.

I let out a gasp as I shot up. “You okay there?” a voiced asked. I looked to see Nami. “Just a bad dream.” I said. “Do you want to talk about it?” Nami asked as she gave me a concerned look. “Not exactly right now but later.” I said. “Was it at least about that clown? You really went through it with him.” Nami said. “Yeah. Can you not tell Zoro please I know he’s still pissed about all that happened.” I said. “Don’t worry your secret is safe with me.” Nami said. “Thanks Nami.” I said giving her a small smile. “Why don’t you go get some fresh air yeah.” Nami suggested. I nodded as I got up from where I was laying. But as I did I could see some water. “Uh are we taking on water?” I asked. “Zoro said that the toilet so I came to check it out.” Nami said. “But we don’t have a toilet.” I said. “This is why you’re my favorite. You’re smarter than the two idiots out there.” Nami said. I smiled as I walked passed her and went outside.

“Hey Y/n look.” Luffy said showing me a jolly roger flag. Honestly it didn’t look to bad. “It looks really nice Luffy.” I said. “Can you help me convince Nami to let me hang it?” Luffy asked. “If were going to need a new ship it would be kind of pointless to hang it up right now. But I will when we get a new ship.” I said. “You mean it?” Luffy asked. I smiled and laughed a little. Luffy pulled me into a hug and lift me off the ground. “Okay. Okay. Put me down.” I said. Luffy did as I asked and I walked over sitting down next to Zoro. “Did you sleep okay?” Zoro asked. “It was decent.” I said. “You had a bad dream didn’t you.” Zoro said. “I can’t hide anything for you can I.” I said. “No. No you can’t. Did you want to talk about it.” Zoro said. “Nami just asked me the same thing. I told her that I will later just not now.” I said. “You better talk to me first when you do.” Zoro said. “No I think I’ll talk to Nami first.” I said. Zoro gave me a playful glare. “You know that I tell you anything first.” I said.

Then I saw Nami rush back out. “We’re taking in water. What did you do?” Nami asked Zoro. “I didn’t do anything.” Zoro said. “The way you’re clanging those swords around all the time you must have broken something.” Nami said, “If you’re such a good thief maybe you should’ve stolen a better boat.” Zoro said. “Guys. Guys. Guys. Okay crew meeting.” Luffy said. “Not a crew.” Both Nami and Zoro said. “Well I’m all ears.” I said. “We’re going to need a better ship to make it to the grand line. A real pirate ship. Worthy of the straw hat crew.” Luffy said. “Wait. Straw hat crew? Really?” Nami asked. “Yeah I thought it had a nice ring to it.” Luffy said smiling. “Demon has a nice ring to it. Headgear? Not scary.” Zoro said. “Who’s says pirates have to be scary?” Luffy asked. “Uh just about everyone apparently.” I said. “The point is we need a new ship. So where do we get one?” Luffy asked. Nami let out a sigh as she grabbed a near by book and started to look through it. “Our closest bet is the Gecko Islands. We can probably make it there before our ship sinks. Ditch this one and get a better one.” Nami said. “Good. With a working toilet.” Zoro said. “Great job navigator.” Luffy said to Nami. My mind went immediately to the dream I just had. “The girl with the tangerine hair is the navigator. What did you bring to the team sweetheart.” Buggys words echoed in my head. I felt someone nudge me. “I’m sorry what?” I asked. “You okay there?” Zoro asked. I forced a smile and nodded. “I’m fine.” I said.

By some sort of miracle we made it Gecko Island. Nami went ahead of us to start looking for a ship. While Zoro, Luffy and I took care of the old one. We made sure that no trace of us was left incase someone found it. But I notice that Luffy didn’t grab the flag he wanted to hang up. “Um Luffy you made sure to get rid or grabbed that jolly roger flag right?” I asked. “I think I might have left on the ship why?” Luffy asked. “Let’s just hope no one we’ve ran into finds it because it might lead them straight to us. Come on we got to go wait for Nami.” I said as we both went to catch up with Zoro.

We found him in the town square. I started to look at one of the marquee’s when I saw a wanted poster for Buggy. Luffy planted himself on the ground with his legs up on the marquee. I smiled as I looked down at him. “I’m going to laugh when someone steps on you.” I said. “You got to be kidding me. That clown was worth 15 millions berry. I should’ve stuffed his head in a bag and brought it with us.” Zoro said. “What marine would pay you that bounty anyway? You’re kind of a wanted man yourself now.” Luffy said. “Hmm. Didn’t think of that.” Zoro said. Then Luffy flipped himself around and stood up. “All the more reason to get to the grand line. Fresh start!” Luffy said patting Zoro on the shoulder. “Right.” Zoro said. I looked to the side to see Nami coming towards us. “Hey! You got us a ship?” Luffy said. “Working on it. Did you push the sloop out to sea like I told you?” Nami asked. “Yeah. No marines are gonna be following us here.” Luffy said. “Well we’re not gonna be here very long. Turns out syrup village is known for their ship building. Lots of options.” Nami said. “Well what are we waiting for then?” Luffy asked rushing off as Nami and Zoro followed him. I sat back as I took the wanted poster for Buggy down. “Y/n you coming or what.” Zoro said. “Coming.” I said as I quickly folded the poster up hiding it in the waistband my shorts.

I rushed as I caught up to Zoro as we followed Nami and Luffy to the ship yard. “Look at them all.” Luffy said. “How much do these cost?” Zoro asked. “If you have to ask you can’t afford it.” Nami said. “I can show this. I’m sure someone will be scared enough and give us a ship.” I said motioning to where Buggy claimed me. “Absolutely not. I’m going to find a way to get that covered up.” Zoro said. “I was joking Zoro geesh.” I said. “Okay so we need to get one with a very very impressive figurehead. At least two. No No three masts! And a really high crow’s nest.” Luffy said. “We are not gonna be able to sail a ship anywhere near that size. There’s only four of us.” Nami said. “Four of us right now.” Luffy said. “Well unless you can find another weird desperate soul to help us.” Nami said. “Speak for yourself.” Zoro said. “Listen. We are going to need something a little less flashy if we want to sneak out of here.” Nami said making Luffy stop. “You want to steal a ship?” Luffy asked. “How else did you expect us to get one?” Nami asked crossing her arms in front of her. “I don’t know. But we can’t steal one.” Luffy said. “What kind of pirate are you?” Nami asked. “A ship is not just a ship. It’s a part of our crew. We need to find the perfect one. And we’re gonna get it the right way.” Luffy said. “Okay pitch that to the salesman. I’m sure that’ll win him over.” Nami said. “Exactly.” Luffy said. I let out a small groan as I put my face in my hands. “This kid is going to kill us.” I said. “So what are we actually gonna do?” Zoro asked. “Find a ship and see how lax the security is around here.” Nami said. “Got it.” Zoro said. “We should catch up to Luffy before he offends the wrong person on accident.” I said. “That honestly sounds like something he will do.” Nami said.

We found him talking with a boy that seemed to be about his age. “There you are.” Nami said. “Guys! I found it. I found our ship and this guy will sell it to us.” Luffy said as he came back to join us. “Uh wait. What? Uh.” The boy said as he too came to join us. “Yeah! The ship we’ll take it.” Luffy said. “Technically she’s not for sale.” The boy said. “Huh?” Luffy said looking confused. “And technically I’m not a salesman.” The boy said. “Oh this just keeps getting better and better.” I said. “Do you even work here?” Nami asked. “Of course I do. I’m chief technician in charge of encrustation removal and aviary waste eradication.” The boy said. I brought a hand to my mouth holding back laughter. “Encru what?” Luffy asked. “He scrubs barnacles and cleans bird shit.” Zoro said. “He can’t help us.” Nami said. “Wait! Wait! Wait! I can help you. The owner of this ship just happens to be my closest friend in the world.” The boy said. “Your friend owns this ship?” Nami asked. “Not just this one. She owns the whole shipyard. She’s rich rich.” The boy said. “Oh.” Luffy said as he looked at us. “I’m sure you can strike a deal with her.” The boy said. “See.” Luffy said. “Well I guess it couldn’t hurt to say hello.” Nami said.

The boy introduced himself as Usopp as he lead us to where his friend lived. If this girl was even is his friend. Usopp brought us to a very big house. “I’ve never seen a house this big before.” Luffy said. “Impressive right? Kaya’s given me an open invitation to drop by anytime I want.” Usopp said. “Wow. All of this just for one person?” Luffy said. “Well she lives here with her butler and a few other staff.” Usopp said. As Luffy looked down the well that was in front of us. “Money really shows you who people truly really are. Most people only care about themselves and what’s theirs.” Nami said. “Sounds like someone I know.” Zoro said. “And a small staff makes for easy pickings.” Nami said. “Why? Gonna rob the blind?” Zorro asked. “At least a little blurry.” Nami said.

I found it odd that Usopp seemed to be leading us from the back. “So if you have an open invitation why are we going around the back way?” Luffy asked. “Oh I never use the front entrance. This is more of a VIP entrance reserved for special guests.” Usopp said. “This guy’s full of shit.” Zoro said. “Yeah. But as long as he gets us inside the house who cares?” Nami said. Then I could see two people one of which noticed us. “Oops. You know there’s actually a more exclusive entrance this way.” Usopp said turning around. But a knife was thrown landing in between Usopps feet. “The hell are you doing here Usopp?” The male asked as he made his way over to us. “Buchi buddy uh Kaya’s expecting me.” Usopp said. “Another one of your lies.” Buchi said as he grabbed Usopp. I watched this unfold with the others. “You ain’t welcome here and you know it.” Buchi said. “I know nothing of the sort. I’m here to give Kaya an extra special gift.” Usopp said. “Usopp!” A female voice said. I looked to see a girl who honestly looked very sick slowly walking towards us with a butler. But he looked very familiar like I’ve seen him somewhere before. I looked to Zoro who had the same expression as me. “What a wonderful surprise.” She said as she carefully walked down a few steps. “Kaya.” Usopp said as he got out of Buchi grip and walked towards her. So he was telling the truth. “Happy birthday.” Usopp said. “You remembered.” Kaya said. “Of course I did.” Usopp said. The butler cleared his throat pushing up his glasses with the palm of his hand. Which I found to be extremely weird. “Usopp. We’ve had this discussion. You mustn’t show up unannounced.” The butler said. “Nonsense Klahadore. Have you come to tell me another story? I do love hearing about your adventures.” Kaya said. Oh this poor poor girl. “Oh I’ll do you one better. I brought some of my crew.” Usopp said as he motioned to us. “Is he talking about us?” Luffy asked. “Play along Luffy. Look at the girl it’s obvious that she’s really sick. Just please play along.” I whisper. Luffy quickly nodded. “Yes we are part of Usopp’s crew.” Luffy said. “It’s so nice to meet you. You all must stay for dinner.” Kaya said as she smiled sweetly at us. “Miss Kaya it is a bit last minute. I’m afraid the kitchen hasn’t prepared for any extra guests.” Klahadore said. “Please Klahdore. It’s my birthday. Can’t be too much trouble can it?” Kaya asked. “Of course Miss Kaya. Anything for you.” Klahdore said. “All right! When do we eat?” Luffy asked clapping his hands together. “You don’t. Not dressed like that. Sham kindly show Usopp and his friends to the guest suites. You will bathe and change before dinner.” Klahadore said. “A bath does sound nice.” Nami said. “Tell me about it.” I said. “My friend here has a wound that I would like to get cleaned up properly if I can get some supplies I can do it.” Zoro said as he motioned to me. “Oh well I can do that for her. She can just come to me after her bath.” Kaya said. “It’s quite alright you have already done enough for us as it is. I really don’t mind if Zoro does it. Happy birthday by the way.” I said. “Oh okay only if you’re sure and thank you. Klahadore can you make sure her friend gets the supplies to clean her wound?” Kaya said. “Of course.” Klahadore said as we walked passed them.

As we followed behind the others Zoro looked behind us. “Tell me that you don’t think he looks familiar.” Zoro said quietly to me. “Yeah he does but I can’t put it together. But I can’t help but shake this bad feeling. We need to be careful around him and the two others. You saw how sick Kaya’s looks what if they have something to do with it.” I said. “How can you be sure about that she could be just some sick girl.” Zoro said. “I don’t know how to explain it. It just all seems off. You trust me on this right?” I asked. “When have I never trusted you. If I’m being honest you’ve been right on things like this more than you’ve been wrong. It’s kinda scary.” Zoro said. “That can’t be true.” I said smiling a little. “Wait I take that back you’ve actually never been wrong.” Zoro said. I laughed a little.

I was shown to my room and honestly it was a nice room. I took the poster of Buggy out and hid it under one of the pillows then headed to the bathroom that was attached. I started to run the water in the tub getting it to the right temperature. As the tub filled I found the towels and a robe. I set them to the side for after I was done. I took off the clothes I was wearing the top and shorts from the outfit that buggy had me wear still was under them. I pulled the right side of the bra to the side to check on the wound. It wasn’t bleeding anymore so at least that was good. I gently ran my finger tips over it wincing slightly. Oddly enough I actually started to miss him. “Stop it. Stop it. You don’t miss him. You can’t miss him. Look what he did to you. That dream you had meant nothing. They care about you. You are not a liability to them.” I said as I looked at myself in the mirror. I took off the bra and the shorts then slipped into the water. I let out a sigh of relief as I sunk in the water. I let myself relax for a bit before I started to clean off my body. But I made sure to gently clean around where Buggy carved his initial on me. The last thing I did was wash my hair. I heard a knock at the bathroom door. “Hey did you drown in there? Come on I want to find a cute dress for dinner and you’ll the only who would give good advice to what looks good and not good on me.” Nami said. “I’m just about done. But you got to be the one to explain to Zoro why I didn’t wait for him to clean my wound first.” I said standing up ringing the excess water from my hair grabbing one of the towels wrapping it around my body and grabbed another to finish drying my hair. “The stuff is already out here I can do it once you get out here.” Nami said. I finished drying off and put the robe on. I grabbed my clothes and walked out of the bathroom.

I saw that Nami too was wearing a robe. “I don’t know about you but I feel so much better.” Nami said. “I feel better too.” I said setting my clothes to the side. “How’s the wound looking?” Nami said as she started to get the stuff ready. “Well it stopped bleeding so at least that’s a good thing.” I said. “After we clean it we should take what’s left it could come in handy.” Nami said. I nodded. I slightly moved my robe so Nami can clean my wound. “Did you want to find something that will cover this?” Nami asked. “I’m not sure honestly. Might as well get questions out of the way sooner rather than later. If I can’t be comfortable with being able to show it now than I might never be.” I said. “I like that. You might have no problem with showing it but we both know Zoro will because he hates that he wasn’t able to stop it from happening.” Nami said. “I know. But he would have stopped me from protecting the kid.” I said. “You surprise me do you know that.” Nami said. “How so?” I asked. “Well Zoro makes it seem like that you need to be locked away just to keep you safe. But you will put your life on the line to protect others. You’re smart a lot smarter than most people I met. But you can be too sweet for your own good.” Nami said. “Maybe that’s why Buggy called me sweetheart.” I joked. Nami laughed a little. “If you ask me I would have to say that he maybe developed a crush on you. He treated you very differently than he treated us. There finished.” Nami said. “Thanks Nami. Come on let’s go find something to wear.” I said standing up fixing the robe.

We walked into the very large closet. “How much time do we have again?” I joked. “You’re telling me.” Nami said. We started looking through the many dresses. “Here try this.” Nami said handing me a navy blue dress. I took the dress from her going behind one of the curtains and changed into the dress. It was velvet. Which felt a little weird against my skin. It was also off the shoulder with long sleeves and a slit down the side. I walked out from behind the curtain to shown Nami. “Well?” I asked. “It’s cute. It’s tight in the right places.” Nami said. “The velvet feels a bit weird on my skin though.” I said. “So a maybe if you can deal with it for however long this dinner will last. I’m going to try this one.” Nami said showing me a dark purple dress with a shaw. I started to look through other dresses. I found a red dress with straps that look that might cover Buggy initial but it couldn’t tell unless I tried it on. “Well?” Nami asked posing. It honestly looked good on her. “It looks really good. Maybe lose the shaw.” I said. “I really would like to keep my shoulders covered.” Nami said. “Oh okay let me try this one on then I’ll help you find something.” I said showing her the red dress. “Oh that’s cute.” Nami said. I smiled as I went to try it on. The straps actually rested on my arms. But I liked it. I walked out to show Nami. “Wow that looks great on you.” Nami said. “There you two are.” Luffy said as he walked into the room. “What do you think Luffy?” Nami asked motioning to my dress. “It’s a nice color.” Luffy said. “Really that’s all you have to say. You’re not going to say anything about how great it looks on her.” Nami said. “It’s okay Nami I kinda figure that getting opinions on how the dresses look would be easier said than done. Here try this.” I said as I found a dress with short sleeves and handed it to her. “It’s not that bad.” Nami said taking the dress from me and went to try it on. “Luffy try to be of more help to us please. Us girls actually don’t mind hearing that something looks good on us every now and then especially if it’s a dress.” I said. “Got it.” Luffy said as he laid down on a bench and looked up.

I went back to looking through the dresses as I waited on Nami to try on the one I gave her. “Why would anyone even need this many clothes?” Luffy asked. “It’s not about need with these people. It’s about want.” Nami said. “What are we even supposed to wear?” Luffy asked. “Anything you want. When are you going to get the opportunity to wear things this nice? Well. What do you think?” Nami asked as she came out to show us the dress. “I like it way better than the other one.” I said as I went behind the curtain to try on another dress. “You look like Nami.” Luffy said. “Luffy want did I say.” I said as I took the dress off. I heard Nami let out a sigh. “Hey Zoro! What are you going to wear?” Luffy asked. “Something black.” Zoro said. “You know I just might wear a black dress just to be mean.” I said. “I thought I told you to wait on me.” Zoro said walking over to where I was. “Um not the best time Zoro my boobs are out.” I said. I could hear Nami and Luffy laughing. “How edgy you two.” Nami said. I finished putting on the next dress. It was a tight fitting dress that was black and red with a see through part at the bottom that started at my knees. “Hey does that butler seem familiar to you guys?” Zoro asked. “Yeah I think he was at the last dinner party I attended.” Nami said. “I swear Y/n and I seen him somewhere.” Zoro said. “How about this one?” I said walking out to show them. “It’s too tight.” Zoro said. “Zoro’s right it is a little to tight.” Luffy said. “How’s this?” Nami asked coming out in a black dress with a jacket. “Still Nami.” Luffy said. “I said I’m wearing black.” Zoro said. “She’s wearing black too.” Nami said. “She’s not going to wear that one it’s too tight.” Zoro said. “Well I think it looks great on you Y/n.” Nami said. “Thanks Nami at least you’re being helpful.” I said. “I can think of someone else who would have been helpful too.” Nami said smirking at me. I went back to looking for another dress to try on. I found another black dress that look a bit more revealing than the one I was wearing. I smirked as I went to try it on. “I feel kind of bad for Kaya. All this stuff. All this space. It’s gotta make a person feel lonely.” Luffy said. “Rich people don’t have to same emotion we do. This stuff doesn't make her feel lonely. It makes her feel important.” Nami said. “Well Usopp likes her. And she invited us to dinner. I’m sure we can work out a way to get that ship.” Luffy said. I finished putting on the dress and it was more revealing. “How about this one?” I asked walking out to show the others. “Yes. No.” Both Nami and Zoro said. “Come on what’s wrong with this one?” Nami asked. “It’s to revealing.” Zoro said. “Maybe Nami was right Buggy would have been more helpful than you two are being.” I said grabbing a random dress and storming off to try it on. I wiped away tears that started to form in my eyes. “You two need to find something to wear so you can leave us to it.” Nami said. It wasn’t long before I heard Zoro and Luffy leaving the room.

“You okay back there?” Nami asked. “I’m fine.” I said as I finished trying on the next dress which was a sliver color. “Don’t let Mr. Moody get to you. I’m guessing that he’s never seen you get this dressed up. I happened to love that last dress on you.” Nami said. I smiled as I came out to show her the sliver dress. “Thanks Nami. How do this one look.” I asked. “It looks okay. But the last one looked better.” Nami said. “You really got the boys to leave quick.” I said looking through the dresses. “Well I figure if Zoro stayed any longer you would give up and not go to dinner making Luffy and I drag you out when it’s time to leave.” Nami said. “You’re probably right.” I said. I grabbed a Chinese style dress and handed it to Nami. “Here try this one.” I said handing her the dress. “If you try this one.” Nami said handed me a lightish purple one. We both went to try on the dresses. “I actually really like this one.” Nami said. “I’m glad this one isn’t that bad either.” I said. I finished putting on the dress and went out to show Nami who was also done. The dress Nami was wearing did really look good on her. “Nami that looks amazing on you. You have to wear it.” I said. “You really think so?” Nami asked. “Yes I do.” I said. “What about you. Found something you really like yet? Ignore what Zoro said. You’ve looked good in all of them so far.” Nami said. “I really like the red one but maybe I should try on few more before I make a decision.” I said.

Nami helped me find three other blue dresses that were a different shades of dark blue. One of the dark blue dresses had a large slit on one side, another was tied at the side and showed a lot of skin, the last one had sleeves that hung loosely on my arms and also had a slit in it. The last one was a black dress that had an opening on the stomach and a slit in it. I honestly really loved the last blue dress I tried on so I put that one back one. “I was hoping that you pick that one. It really does look beautiful on you.” Nami said. “Thanks Nami.” I said. “Us girls have to stick together.” Nami said.

We finished getting ready together. I let Nami do my hair she put it into a single braid. “There now look at you. Aren’t you beautiful.” Nami said. “Let’s go down stairs before Zoro says something.” I said. “Let’s go.” Nami said as we left my room. We walked down the stairs thankfully Zoro wasn’t down yet but Luffy and Usopp were. “Well don’t you ladies look beautiful.” Usopp said. We both started to laugh a little. “Thanks.” I said. “At least someone is telling her that she looks beautiful.” Nami said. “Oh now that’s a tragedy. Who told her that she didn’t look beautiful.” Usopp said. “Zoro.” Nami said. “Don’t worry I’ll have some words with him.” Usopp said walking away to find Zoro. “Zoro is going to kill him isn’t he.” I said. “Yep.” Nami said.

A few minutes later Usopp was dragging Zoro over to me “Well I’ll let you two talk it out.” Nami said as she walked away. “Nami.” I said. “You two need to talk. I don’t want to have to deal with you two mad at each other.” Nami said. Usopp shoved Zoro to me. It was honestly awkward between us and it was never awkward between us. “You look nice.” Zoro said. “Are you sure it’s not to revealing?” I asked. “I didn’t mean to make you upset. I just never seen you wearing anything like that before. I guess I just didn’t know how to react.” Zoro said. “It’s okay I forgive you.” I said. “Why don’t you take a seat and I’ll get you a drink.” Zoro said. “Acting like a gentleman I see.” I said. “Don’t get use to it.” Zoro said as I took a seat on a couch while he went to go get drinks. Zoro came back handed me a drink as he sat down next to me. Just then Kaya came down with the stairs with the butler. “I think I figure out where I’ve seen him.” Zoro whispered to me. “You hunted him didn’t you?” I asked. “Stay here.” Zoro said. I nodded. Zoro got up and went to talk to Klahadore. It was only a few minutes before he came back. “Well?” I asked. “He swore it wasn’t him.” Zoro said. “You don’t believe him.” I said. “I don’t.” Zoro said. “Shall we all move to the dining room.” Klahadore said. “Yes.” Luffy yelled excitedly. I laughed shaking my head. Zoro got up grabbing his swords with one hand and held out the other to me. I put my hand in his as he helped me up.

Kaya smiled as she walked up to me. “Y/n don’t you look beautiful.” Kaya said. “Thank you. You look beautiful too.” I said. “Thank you. When my mom was your age that was my dad’s favorite dress on her. I’m sure I can say to same about Zoro.” Kaya said. “Oh. We.” I said before Zoro interrupted. “Yes I do. I don’t get to see her wear a dress that often but this has to be my favorite.” Zoro said. “I’m sure that you two will have the same love has my parents once had.” Kaya said has she walked passed us. “What was that?” I asked quietly. “Like you said she’s sick play along. Now come lets go eat.” Zoro said. “Hate you.” I said. “No you don’t.” Zoro said.

I sat on one side of the table with Zoro on my right and Usopp on my left. The female staff member was about to pour me a glass of wine. “Oh no wine for me please.” I said. “Do you not like wine Y/n? I’m sure we can get you something else.” Kaya asked. “I’m just not a big alcohol drinker. I never really like the taste rather it be wine or beer.” I said. “Well there’s nothing wrong with that.” Kaya said. “Besides who else will take care of Zoro when he has too many.” I said laughing a little. Which made Kaya laugh a little.

At first it was nothing but small talk. “I’d love to try the fish tonight.” Kaya said. “I’m sorry Miss Kaya but that is not possible.” Klahadore said. “Maybe just a small piece?” Kaya asked hopefully. “Now you know that certain foods can affect your constitution. Here Buchi has prepared your special soup.” Klahadore said as Buchi placed a bowl infront of Kaya. “Kaya it’s your birthday. You should be able to eat what you want.” Nami said. “Miss Kaya’s medical condition necessitates that I closely monitor her dietary needs.” Klahadore said. “Does it mean you also speak for her?” Nami asked. “But you’re not a doctor. You can grow out of some medical conditions. Kaya will never know unless she tries foods that she hasn’t eaten since she was told about the medical condition.” I said. Klahadore glared at both Nami and I. “I’ll take her fish.” Luffy said raising his hand. “Luffy isn’t there something that you wanted to talk to Kaya about?” Usopp asked. “Oh yes! Usopp told me that you own the whole shipyard.” Luffy said. “Well actually my parents founded the shipyard and Merry’s been running the business since well since they passed. But all of that’s about to change. Tonight at midnight I will become the sole owner.” Kaya said. I happened to look at Klahadore and the two other staff members their expression slightly change. “Ah. Well that’s great because we want to buy a ship from you.” Luffy said taking a drink. “I see. Usopp mentioned that you’re sailors.” Kaya said smiling at Usopp. “Nope not sailors.” Luffy said. “Luffy.” I said motioning for him to stop. “We’re pirates.” Luffy said. I put my head in my hands. I hear Usopp choke on his drink. “This ought to be good.” Zoro said. “I swear this kid is going to put me in an early grave.” I said. “Pirates?” Kaya asked. “Yep. We haven’t sailed together for very long but we have already defeated an evil clown who was strangely fond of Y/n, raided a marine base, and taken down a captain with an axe for a hand.” Luffy said. “These sound a lot like your adventures Usopp.” Kaya said looking to Usopp. “Yeah that’s. That’s crazy.” Usopp said. “Oh yeah. And we’re just getting started.” Luffy said as he stood up getting on top of the table. “Luffy get down now.” I said. “Ohhh you made her get at the mom voice.” Zoro said. I glared over at Zoro. “I do not have a mom voice.” I said. “Yeah you do.” Zoro said. “What are you doing? Get down from there at once!” Klahadore said. “Being a pirate has been my dream for as long as I can remember. And I’m finally making it a reality. We’re heading out to the grand line where even more adventures await us. And at the end of the journey I’m gonna find the ultimate treasure the one piece and become king of the pirates.” Luffy said walking across the table to Kaya. “Monkey D Luffy I swear to god if you don’t get down from this table right now I will take away your hat for a week.” I said. “See mom voice.” Zoro said. “Not. The. Time.” I said. “You’re serious.” Kaya said. Luffy handed Klahadore his drink as he bent down putting his hands on Kaya’s shoulders. “Kaya you have a beautiful ship out there. A caravel with sheep figurehead. It spoke to me. That’s the ship we need to follow our dreams. I promise you we’ll take care of it. Maintain it. Treat it like any other member of our crew because a ship is also a home.” Luffy said. “That will be quite enough! I should’ve known Usopp would bring riffraff to our doorstep.” Klahadore it’s okay. I.” Kaya said as she started to cough. “Now look what you’ve done. You’ve upset Miss Kaya. All of you out of this house at once!” Klahadore yelled. “Actually she was just fine until you started to yell.” I pointed out. Which made Klahadore glare at me more. “No. It’s late. Let them stay the night.” Kaya said. “As you wish Miss Kaya but they are out first thing in the morning.” Klahadore said as he helped Kaya up and out of the dining room.

“That went pretty well. Don’t you think?” Luffy said. “Get down now.” I said. “Alright. Alright.” Luffy said getting down from the table taking off his hat hiding it behind his back. “I won’t take it away this time but you better listen to me next time.” I said. Luffy nodded as he put his hat back on with a smile. “See mom voice told you.” Zoro said. “I don’t have a mom voice.” I said. “Yeah you do.” Everyone agreed. “I hate all of you.” I said getting up and made my way back to my room.

I took off my dress gently setting it to the side as I put my clothes back on. I heard a knock at my door. “Am I good to come in or do you have your boobs out.” Nami said jokily. “You’re good their put away.” I said. Nami opened the door and walked in. I noticed that she had a pillowcase. “I’m going to go find stuff to steal wanna come?” Nami asked. “Sure. Nothing better to do. I’m afraid if I sleep I might have another dream about him.” I said. “Come on then we can talk about the first one or if you’re still not ready we do have to.” Nami said. “Thanks Nami.” I said smiling. I followed Nami out of my room as we made our way around the mansion as Nami picked random things and put them in the pillowcase. Once we heard footsteps getting close we went into the closest room.

The light turned on scaring both Nami and I. “Nami? Y/n?” Kaya asked. Nami hid the pillowcase behind her back. “What are you doing? Is everything all right?” Kaya asked. “Sorry this house is so massive. We were just trying to find the bathroom.” Nami said. “With a pillowcase?” Kaya said. Nami brought the pillowcase out and set it to the side. “So you two are pirates after all.” Kaya said getting up from bed and sitting in a nearby chair. “I hate pirates. But I am who I am. And I won’t apologize for that. Y/n didn’t take anything it was all me. She just wanted to avoid sleeping.” Nami said. “To be honest I find some of the décor to be a bit gaudy. I’d prefer to donate it to charity.” Kaya said. “I’m not charity.” Nami said. “No of course not. I simply meant what’s the point in having so much if you can’t share it with others. Like those in need. Family. Friends.” Kaya said. “So we’re friends now? You don’t even know us?” Nami said. “Usopp does and that’s a start.” Kaya said motioning for us to sit down. Nami sat down on the couch and I sat down on another chair next to the couch. “So what do we do now? Have a sleepover? Do each other’s makeup?” Nami asked. Kaya laughed a little before having another coughing fit. “Kaya are you okay?” Nami asked. Kaya shook her head as she looked at us sadly. “Not you both too.” Kaya said. “What?” Nami asked. “Everyone’s so careful around me. Like one wrong move and I’ll break. I don’t want your pity.” Kaya said. “Well you won’t get it then.” Nami said. Kaya smiled at us.

“Y/n why did Nami said you wanted to avoid sleeping?” Kaya asked. “Oh I guess that the events that went down between me and the clown Luffy mention is still effecting me.” I said. “What happened?” Kaya asked. “To start he held us hostages for a bit. But he treated me very different than he did the others. He and his crew used a smoke cloud that made us passed out. The other three woke up in a wooden box. But I woke up on his lap to him poking me asking me to see my beautiful eyes. Like Luffy said he was fond of me for some reason. He or at least someone in his crew changed me into this revealing jester outfit. He wanted me to become apart of his crew but Zoro is protective of me.” I said. “He was going to kill him where he stood. Zoro was pissed when he saw the clown put his hands all over her.” Nami said. “I can tell. Zoro loves you so much.” Kaya said. “Zoro doesn’t love me in that way but he does love me.” I said. “Oh I’m sorry I just thought that you two were together.” Kaya said. “No it’s okay. I just remind him of a friend that he knew. Something bad happened and he lost her so he thinks protecting me in the way he couldn’t for his friend will make up for it.” I said. “That’s actually a very sweet thing to hear. What else happened with this clown?” Kaya asked. “He was very dead set on keeping me. He tried to get Luffy to tell him where he had hid the map to the grand line. But when Luffy didn’t he was going to hurt someone in the crowd that he was holding hostage. I couldn’t live with myself if that happened so I suggested to him to crave his initial on me if I could handle the pain without making a sound then he wouldn’t hurt anyone.” I said as I move my shirt so Kaya can see it. “That’s awful.” Kaya said. “I don’t see it that way. I would rather it be who got hurt before one of them. The reason I’m avoiding sleep is a had a dream where I was back there with him. He told me that the others left me because I was just a liability to them. That I brought nothing to the team.” I said as I wiped tears from my eyes. “That not true you know that right Y/n.” Nami said. “I don’t even know what I bring to the team Nami. So tell me what I bring to the team.” I said. “You protect people. You protected that kid and the towns people.” Nami said. “It’s not like Zoro would let me do something like that again.” I said. “That might be true for right now but maybe if you prove to him that he doesn’t need to protect you as much. I know that I haven’t known you too for long but I thinks he knows that protecting you has much as he is now won’t do you any good.” Nami said. “It does make me feel trapped but I know he doesn’t mean to do it on purpose.” I said. “Then you should tell him Y/n. Making you feel trap might do more harm than good.” Kaya said. “I will I promise.” I said. “Don’t worry I’ll make sure the two of them talk.” Nami said. “Why do we talk about a different boy now.” I said. “We already talked about all the boys.” Kaya said. “Not all of them theres one that we have talked about yet.” Nami said. “Who haven’t we talked about?” Kaya asked. “Usopp.” Nami and I both said smiling. “Oh.” Kaya said smiling a little. “So are you and Usopp a thing?” I asked. “Oh. Um. Usopp and me? No. No. We’ve know each other for years. Ever since his mother died. He didn’t have anybody so my parents gave him a job at the shipyard. He likes to come around and tell me all about his brave exploits and his grand adventures. And truth is they make me feel better.” Kaya said. “Your parents what happened to them?” Nami asked. “They um. They died at sea. All these years and it still takes my breath away. I couldn’t even go though their belongings. Just locked up the memories in the east wing where their bedroom was.” Kaya said. “I’m sorry.” Nami said. “Have you lost anyone close to you?” Kaya asked. “No.” Nami said. “I’m jealous.” Kaya said. “Said the rich girl.” Nami said. “You’re not very good at this friends thing are you?” Kaya asked. Then all three of us started to laugh. “No I guess I’m not.” Nami said.

The three of us talked of a bit longer. I told them about how I met Zoro and what my life was like before I met Luffy and Nami. I really didn’t talk much about my life before Zoro. “Why don’t you two join me for breakfast tomorrow? Zoro and Luffy too. We can discuss a deal for the caravel.” Kaya asked as the three of us got up. “I’d like that. This may not be my place but don’t let Klahadore or anyone for that matter run life. You’re stronger than you think.” Nami said. “Yeah. I know I don’t know him like you do Kaya but I don’t trust him and I think he’s hiding something. You can even ask Zoro yourself I’m never wrong when it comes to being able to tell a person’s character.” I said. “I appreciate that. Good night Nami. Good night Y/n.” Kaya said. “Good night.” Nami said. “Good night Kaya.” I said. “Don’t forget your pillow Nami.” Kaya said with a small smile. Nami grabbed the pillowcase as we walked out.

“Well I might try to get some sleep what about you?” I asked. “I’m going to put the stuff back.” Nami said. I gave her a small smile and then made my way back to my room. “Hey Y/n.” Nami said making me stop. I turned to look at her. “Yeah Nami.” I said. “I think I know of another thing that you bring to the team.” Nami said. “What is it?” I asked. “You’ll be able to tell if someone be helpful or not. I don’t think I’ve met many people who can tell a persons character like the way you said you can.” Nami said. “I guess I found my own way of being able to tell when you’ve been with a pirate hunter as long as I’ve been with Zoro.” I said. “Yeah. If you want to learn a bit about on how to defend yourself I can teach you.” Nami said. “As long as you’re the one to tell Zoro he’s out of the job I would love that.” I said. Making both of us laugh a little. “Yeah even I don’t think he would stop.” Nami said. “Yeah he won’t. Night Nami.” I said. “Night Y/n.” Nami said. I walked back to my room and went to lay down. I put my hand under the pillows to see if the wanted poster of Buggy was still there. Thankfully it was. I unfolded it as I looked at his face. “Maybe that dream was wrong. Maybe I can prove I’m not a liability. But I. I’m just not ready to admit to the others that I miss you just yet.” I said. Then I frantic knock was at my door. I quickly put the poster back under the pillow and Nami rushed in. “Nami what’s wrong?” I asked as I sat up. “You were right. You were right about Klahadore.” Nami said. “How did you find this out?” I asked. “I went to find Zoro and Luffy. I found Luffy in the kitchen passed out. I tried to wake him but I heard Klahadore and the other two coming so I hid. I overheard that Klahadore and the other two have been poisoning Kaya and they plan to kill her after midnight so they can have her money.” Nami said. I jumped up from bed and rushed to Nami. “We need to get to Kaya first. We need to get her out of here and into somewhere safe.” I said. We both rushed out of my room and ran to Kaya’s room without trying to make much noise to alert Klahadore that we were on to him.

Taglist: @ultimatreality @honey-eyed-munson @bigmilkylove

Taglist is still open!

[blueinkjpeg]

Okay but one thing I really like about Kit’s characterization is that she’s the antithesis to the Disney princess stereotype but also fills the stereotype perfectly?? But also in a way that subverts the troupe??

Like okay, we can guess from her line about how she wishes she were “anyone but a princess” and the general way she acts that Kit has a complex relationship with femininity. I’m mostly just speculating, but it’s probably just because she associates most feminine traits she has or is forced into with her royal title, and so hates it all.

Being a princess political and socially demands a few immovable things. Having the patience and emotional bandwidth to run a nation, present herself in a distinctly feminine and uptight way, and marrying specifically a man her mother chose so that she can give birth to precautionary heirs.

These are all things Kit is incapable, or relatively incapable, of doing. Kit, just base personality wise, isn’t a patient person. She doesn’t think ahead most of the time, and she doesn’t have the interest in learning it. Also, she’s literally a lesbian and if she goes through with the marriage her mom set up, is doomed to a life of misery and unfulfillment, not to mention that the s*x part of the marriage will be traumatic no matter how it happens. And I literally cannot imagine her as a mom, sorry. Forcing Kit into this role is like trying to shove a circle into the square hole of those baby toys.

I can only imagine Sorsha trying to continuously shove Kit into this role that she cannot fufill would leave Kit frustrated with herself for being unable to fit, and hating anything having to do with it. Like— the whole reason Kit was born was to fill this role. Imagine being physically and emotionally incapable of doing the one thing you were born to do? Kit’s never feeling good enough trauma is just apparent in the show as her abandonment issues. Despite knowing she can’t fill this role and clearly not trying to anymore, doesn’t mean she doesn’t hold a lot of frustration with herself for it.

As an obvious butch, I think Kit would end up in her style no matter how her life turned out, but I also think that the more her mom pushed Kit toward femininity where Kit wasn’t able to fit correctly, the more Sorsha ended up actually pushing Kit in the opposite direction. Frustrated she can’t go one way, she’s clearly ended up going the opposite way.

Just like when her mother didn’t want her to learn sword fighting, she sought a way to learn “on her own” with Jade. Kit isn’t really an authority person. She likely sees it as getting farther away from her mother, and closer to her dad, like how she lost her mom’s sword and picked up her dad’s in the show.

But it’s not just fashion, Kit’s shown distain for “feminine traits” (or traditional Disney princess traits wink wink) she has in her personality. The most obvious example is Kit’s feelings for Jade. They’re very deeply ingrained onto who she is as a person. They’re raw and venerable and Kit goes like five whole episodes after kissing Jade to even consider talking about them. Kit goes lengths to avoid talking or confronting her deeper emotions.

But it remains that Kit feels things very deeply. When Sorsha yells at Arik and Kit in episode 1, Kit’s the only one that starts crying. She loves Jade so much, and is so afraid of being rejected, that when she confesses, she also starts crying. When locked in a cage thinking Jade might be in trouble, she freaks out on Elora. On truth strum, she borderline begs Elora for advice. When she finds out her dad might be alive and that he thinks Elora is “what matters most in this world,” she breaks down and yells. She uses the power of love to save Arik’s life.

Girl cannot hold a grudge to save her life, btw. She’s so pissed at her mom episode 1, the next morning she’s crying at her bedside because she’s worried Sorsha might be upset with her. Jade says she’s abandoning her and Kit’s over it and kissing her on the lips in the span of a few hours. Kit apologizes to Graydon for being a bitch at the engagement dinner. She gets pissed at Boorman for potentially leaving her dad to die and then it’s literally never brought up again bc she’s over it. She tries soooo hard to be mad at Elora for mattering to both her parents more than Kit does, and fails miserably after like a week max.

She’s a teeny ball of rage but it’s not in her nature to hate people for whatever reason.

She’s a very sensitive person. So much so, that she has a quiet arc about how she can’t really stand death.

That possum she has to go fetch for Elora? She can’t even look at it. When the jar breaks and she has to go hold it in her hands? She’s pinching it a full arms length away from her body. As Elora’s cutting it up she’s physically gagging. She tries to talk about Ballentine with Jade, but she can’t even say the word “killed.” She tries SO hard to be macho and tough and be the one to kill Graydon, but Jade and Boorman both already knows she’s weak shit. Kit BAILS. It’s the moment of truth and Graydon’s dying and Kit ORDERS Jade not to kill him as she SOBS and BEGS Elora to figure out a way to save his life bc she can’t stand to watch him die. A throwing star hits her in the arm and she SCREAMS ANS PASSES OUT. Jade has to mentally prepare her to rip it out and she SCREAMS AGAIN. She’s the most reluctant person in the world to fight her brother. And when she wins the fight and tries to kill him, her body won’t even let her. When Elora tells her to stand down, Kit collapses into tears like she was praying someone would stop her.

And it’s clear at the beginning of the season, Kit hold a lot of resentment towards herself for having these traits. They’re not inherently feminine traits to have, but she associates them with being a princess and hates them on principle. She’s probably been told her whole life to be nicer, politer, more empathetic. She doesn’t want to be any of those things, she wants to be who she remembers her dad to be; a brave, admired, tough knight. Kit wants to be brave and strong and she thinks she can’t have that if she acts like Sorsha wants her to, since it’s clear Sorsha doesn’t want either of her kids to be like Madmartigan. She wants them to be a certain way, she wants them to be the opposite of the militaristic way she was raised. But the truth is, there’s nothing Kit can do about it. She is a sensitive, loving, empathetic person, that’s it. This is who she is, and her arc in this show is learning to be herself. All parts of herself.

Kit gets to love the venerable, sensitive parts of herself without giving up the masculine badass sword fighter that she’s always wanted to be, the way she assumed she’d have to. She gets to be both!!! She gets the cool ass armor and she can be emotionally available. She can express fear and love and still be brave and strong!!!

Kit emerges from this show at the heart of the questing gang. Y’all have no idea how much I love that.

[rosys-fans-fics]

Emerald Grove Group Timeline

One thing that’s confused me about act 1 is when people have arrived in the emerald grove and left it. We have a lot of moving parts going on so let me list them all out.

Spoilers below for some Emerald Grove quests and secrets

Arriving

The Teiflings - they arrive being chased by a gnoll party as we know many of the Teiflings saw their friends killed by goblins and gnolls before arriving at the grove.

The Gnoll party - this is the group that attacks the Teiflings initially and kills people like Lihala, Alfira’s mentor.

Dissected Drow Goblin party - the drow being dissected by Halsin attacked Halsin and Nettie while they were meditating.

The shadow Druids - the three rats that are getting Kahga to do the rite of thorns.

Aradin’s Crew first arrival - they have to arrive at the grove not being cashed by goblins. This includes Aradin, Remira, Barth, Liam, the three dead adventurers at the bridge, two new dead adventures in the goblin camp (I believe they are new), and Brian the dwarf being roasted.

Wyll- he arrives after the nautiloid shows up because him and Karlach get on it while in the hells.

Findal- the Hafling/Gnome in the underground passage who’s knocked out.

Goblin tunnel party - these are the goblins that are in the tunnel to the grove between the prisons to the left side of the gate.

The Gate goblin party - this is the goblin party we fight outside the grove.

Aradin’s crew second arrival - Aradin arrives outside the grove with only Remira and Barth

Zorru’s scouting party - Zorru and the Teifling who we find being eaten by the Ogrers went scouting and ran into the Githyanki on the risen road near the mountain pass.

Nymessa and Damays - the Teiflings who find Lae’zel in the goblin camp. They get in before the second goblin party attacks.

Leaving

Aradin and Halsin - Halsin joins Aradin’s crew to investigate the abandoned Selûnite temple

Zorru’s scouting party - either left before entering the grove to scout ahead or left right after arriving with main Teifling party

Nymessa and Damays - leave to check out the nautiloid explosion.

Grove Gate Policy

Halsin’s Grove policy - while Halsin is at the grove, anyone can come in. He freely offers shelter to the Teifling refugees and lets Aradin’s crew to set up camp.

Kagha’s and Zevlor’s Grove Policy?

This one is a bit confusing because we know that Kagha wants every non Druid out of the grove but during the ‘open the bloody gate cutscene’ we have Kanon telling us that he was ordered by Zevlor to not let anyone in. If you wait to trigger the dialogue, you can hear Aradin yelling to go get Zevlor and Kanon yelling back that he’s been informed. Once the battle is over and if you avoid triggering the confrontation cutscene, Aradin and Zevlor have dialogue where Aradin says he blames Zevlor for not opening the gate. We also have Remira saying they shouldn’t have trusted the Teiflings.

But we also know that the grove was expecting Halsin to return. Was Zevlor going to keep the gate closed until he could verify it was Halsin? Or was Kagha going to keep Halsin out to preform the right of thorns?

So I believe that when Aradin and Halsin left the grove, they were expecting an easy return but Kagha has Zevlor keeping a tight hold on who comes in and out. This is also why I think Wyll showed up before Halsin left.

Known Grove Activities

What have these people been doing?

We know from the banter between the Teifling couple that the Teiflings were on the road for 3 days before being attacked by gnolls and goblins.

Halsin has to dissect the Drow and realize the tadpoles are different from regular tadpoles.

Zevlor and Aradin get to hate eachother. These two haven’t met before the grove so in that window of time where they meet before Aradin leaves with Halsin, they grow to hate eachother a lot.

Kagha is able to turn the grove mostly against the outsiders. This was probably easy for her as there were multiple stressors on the grove.

Kagha being influenced by the shadow Druids.

Arabella tries to steal the idol and gets caught.

Proposed timeline

Shadow Druids make contact with Kagha and influence her to believe the rite of throne is needed to keep the Grove safe from the absolute cult.

Halsin and Nettie are attacked by the Goblin party led by the male Drow.

Halsin dissects the male Drow and finds out the tadpole is different.

The Teiflings are attacked by the Gnolls and many are killed by goblins as they flee to the grove.

Halsin convinces the other Druids to let the Teiflings stay.

Zorru’s scouting party leaves the grove. (This can happen anywhere between Teiflings arriving to Nymessa and Damays investigating the crash).

Aradin’s crew arrives at the Grove. He most likely didn’t come across any goblins because he didn’t know the temple was filled with goblins.

Aradin and Zevlor have conflict most likely over Aradin being okay with Halsin accompanying him and probably Aradin being confrontational.

Halsin leaves with Aradin putting Nettie in charge of keeping the dissected Drow secure and Kagha leading the grove.

Kagha convinces the other Druids they need to preform the rite of thrones.

Zorru returns from scouting and tells everyone about the githyanki.

Nautiloid crashes at night

Wyll arrives at the grove and endures himself to the Teiflings

Nymessa and Damays leave to investigate the crash and return.

Final is ambushed by goblins while gathering herbs and is knocked out in the underground passage.

Arabella tries to steal the idol and gets caught.

Aradin and his remaining crew return to the grove followed by the Goblin party and the player party.

So yeah, that’s my rough reconstruction of what’s happened at the grove before we arrive. Lots of moving parts so let me know if I miss anything!

[pippytmi]

leah x fatin from this prompt list: "it’s like 3AM and my roommate locked me out of the house and I forgot my keys and I’m really drunk pls take pity on me and let me crash at your place for the night o’ neighbor of mine AU"

_______________________________________

“Dorothy,” Fatin groans, thumping her head against the door for the millionth time. “Please, please, let me in. Are you mad at me? Is it because I called your boyfriend a grade-A hottie? I was just trying to be supportive, I don’t really find him that hot.” She pauses. “Or is it the laundry thing? I swear I’ll stop stealing your T-shirts and actually go to the laundromat more. I’ve never touched your lesbian cargo pants! Doesn't that count for anything? Dorothyyyy.”

Still nothing but continued silence. Fatin takes a sad gulp of her beatbox and debates crying. Maybe then Dot will open the door—she hates it when Fatin cries, calls it gross and ugly. At the very least, Dot won't subject the neighbors to it.

There’s a sudden cough, and Fatin sits up, prepared to fight for her life (or at least her drink), but there’s no danger in sight; it’s just Leah, the reclusive student who lives across the hall, who sometimes comes over when Dot needs help drinking the beer Fatin refuses to touch. “I think your roommate is out,” she tells Fatin slowly. “I saw her leave like three hours ago.”

“Well fuck me,” Fatin says, stunned. “I’ve been groveling to that bitch for like twenty minutes.”

Leah shifts from foot to foot, obviously uncomfortable. “Yeah, I heard you,” she says. “It’s kind of distracting.”

“Distracting?” Fatin repeats, first out loud, and then several more times in her head, not sure what to make of it. Until understanding suddenly dawns, and she sits up with a renewed interest. “Holy shit, do you have company over? Are you getting some?”

“What? No!” Leah’s skin turns a bright shade of red. “I’m trying to write a paper.”

“Ugh, lame,” Fatin says, slumping right back against the floor. “Just when I thought you might be interesting.”

Leah blinks. “Okay, well,” she says after a beat. “I just wanted to let you know.” She cracks open her apartment door, lingering in the doorway only to ask, “Will you be…alright?”

“No, Leah, I will not,” Fatin scoffs. “I’m drunk as shit and I need to pee and Dot has obviously abandoned me when I need her the most. I'm probably going to die in this hallway.” She has to pause for a necessary shiver. “I think this might be the lowest I've ever been. Like, physically and emotionally.”

Two doors down, there is the distinct sound of a bang against the wall. “Shut the fuck up!”

“You shut up!” Fatin yells back at whoever it is. Toni, probably. What an asshole.

Leah doesn't move, still half-shielded by her own door, and she does not comment on Toni’s asshole-ness. “Did you try calling Dot’s phone?”

“Obviously,” Fatin says. “But now my phone’s dead, and Dot didn't answer any of my calls. I called her like fifty times, Leah. At least.”

Another bang. “It's three in the fucking morning!”

“Go to hell, Toni!”

Leah sighs. “I can try to call Dot,” she says, like this is all some big inconvenience to her, which is really very rude considering that Fatin and Dot are stellar neighbors. Plus Dot is almost Leah’s friend, so…Fatin is a friend by association. Or whatever. “Do you have anywhere you can stay in the meantime?”

“No, I live here now,” Fatin says sorrowfully, stretching out onto the horrifyingly sticky carpet floor. “Hey. Wait a second, I can just crash with you!”

“Uh,” Leah casts an uneasy glance over her shoulder. “My roommate is asleep, and the place isn't really fit for…company.”

“Are you really going to make me beg twice?” Fatin says. “Cause you know I can do it. I will cry on your doorstep. That is a threat and a promise.” She sits up, determined, as Leah continues to hesitate. “Come on! Take pity on a poor, drunk, damsel in distress. I have a stupid chem final tomorrow—are you really going to let me suffer out here all night?”

“I guess you can stay until Dot’s back,” Leah says, finally opening her door all the way. “But you have to be really quiet. Rachel will kill both of us if you wake her up.”

“Rachel loves me, don’t even worry,” Fatin says, downing the rest of her beatbox in one go. Or mostly, anyway, because some of it spills out of the corner of her mouth. Whatever, it’s not like the carpet hasn’t seen worse spills.

Leah doesn’t attempt to hide her wince. But she also does not take her invitation back, so Fatin counts it as a win.

“I’ll get you a phone charger,” Leah says. A beat. “And some water.”

“You’re a lifesaver,” Fatin says, sinking onto the couch with a deep, satisfied exhale. “Any chance you have food? I would actually kill for something deep-fried.”

“We probably don’t have much, but you can look,” Leah’s voice fades out as she vanishes into the bedroom, and Fatin doesn’t need to be told twice.

Probably is too kind a word—there is absolutely nothing to eat at all, beside a stack of individual meals in tupperware that are aggressively labeled “Rachel.” Fatin abandons the fridge and rummages through the cupboards instead, finding her saving grace in the one constant of any college diet: instant ramen.

Before Fatin can even tear it open for an attempt at (drunk) cooking, Leah comes back, and she eyes Fatin up and down like she wants to say something but doesn't. Except: “I found a charger.”

Fatin hugs the ramen to her chest and can only stare. “That's not an iPhone charger,” she says. “Oh God, are you an Android girl?”

Leah frowns. “What’s wrong with having an Android?”

“I am so sorry you live in the dinosaur age,” Fatin says, crinkling her nose in disgust. “Forget it, I’ll have to borrow one from Rachel in the morning.”

“So now you’re staying the night?” Leah doesn’t even try to hide her unease at the idea.

Fatin huffs. “Oh relax, I’m not trying to sleep in your bed or anything,” she says. “Just let me crash on your couch, c’mon. Don't be a dick…please.”

“Fine, whatever,” Leah says, obviously affronted at the idea of being called a dick. “You’re not going to throw up, are you?”

“No, I will not throw up on your precious couch. Damn, you’re judgy.” Fatin goes right back to her unopened ramen in a futile attempt to open it with her nails (they’re a new set, and too expensive to break), before Leah finally sighs and takes pity on her.

“If I make you something to eat, will you be quiet?”

“Can you even cook?” Fatin snarks right back, but Leah plucks the bag from Fatin’s hands without taking the bait.

“Bathroom’s the first door down the hallway,” Leah says—an obvious dismissal—and Fatin would be offended if she didn't have to take a piss.

The bathroom mirror has seen better days, cracked right down the middle like something out of a horror movie. Fatin’s mascara-smeared face reflects back at her, and she halfheartedly scrubs at the marks until she looks more alive.

When she’s done, she re-enters the kitchen to find Leah poking the bubbling Ramen with a fork and inspiring zero confidence that this girl can even cook. The fact is only driven home when Leah asks,

“Do you want cheese?”

“Cheese?” Fatin repeats. “Am I a fucking mouse?”

Leah rolls her eyes. “On your noodles.” She waves a Kraft single between two fingers, and Fatin officially loses all respect for this girl.

“Ew, no way,” Fatin says. “That stuff's practically radioactive.”

“Then here.” Leah pours the soup into a bowl, immediately moves off to rinse out the pot and clean up the minimal mess from her efforts.

Suddenly, Fatin feels the tiniest bit guilty. Maybe she's not exactly the best house guest…or whatever. “Wait, don't you want some of this?”

Leah twists to look at Fatin, and she's noticeably perplexed at the offer. “It's three in the morning.”

“And?” Fatin waits for a better answer. Leah doesn't give one.

So that's how they end up splitting instant ramen noodles, Leah with (gross) cheese on hers and Fatin with a generous helping of Sriracha on her own. They put the TV on mute and read the subtitles for a horrible black-and-white movie on Netflix, and a thought suddenly occurs to Fatin.

“Hey, is this a date?”

Leah chokes. “What?”

“We’re having dinner and watching a movie,” Fatin says. “This is more wine and dine action than I’ve seen in years.”

“I’m just keeping you company until Dot comes home or you fall asleep,” Leah says. “God, you’re a lot more self-centered than Dot says.”

Fatin narrows her eyes. “She told you I was self-centered?”

“She said self-involved, actually.” Leah carefully drinks some soup from the rim of her bowl. “And you’re also drunk. I wouldn’t go on a date with a drunk person.”

“So you’re saying you would consider a date with me when I’m sober?” Fatin asks, and Leah turns a bright shade of red.

“No,” Leah says, and continues eating.

“That would be a lot more convincing if you didn’t keep staring at my tits,” Fatin says, unfazed as she waves her chopsticks in the air, and Leah chokes all over again.

(It’s certainly going to be something to revisit in the morning, in any case).

[gretavangroupie]

Vigilance (Chapter 21 Part 2)

Word count: 20.3k

Pairings: Jake x Reader, Jake x OC

Warnings: Alcohol, Cursing, Dramatic Themes. Angst Including: Talks of Infidelity, Toxic Themes, Arguing, Yelling, Extreme Portrayal of Sadness, Crying, Abandonment, Heartbreak, Talks of Illness, Extreme Illness, Fainting, Hospitalization, Hospital Procedures and Protocols, Mentions of IV, Needles, Talks of Death and Dying. Fluff.

This story is a collaboration with my best pal @gretavanmoon.

JAKE POV

A knock at the door caused your eyes to flutter open from the in and out sleep you’d been in all day. The medicine they were giving you, keeping you constantly fighting off sleep. You were breathing better, but still in an incredible amount of pain, and feeling worthless to boot. You turned your head to look at your mom, who was already standing to open the door. 

As it swung open you saw Y/N, standing in the door, like your own personal angel. Your eyes widened as they focused in on her; wavy hair and red eyes, her favorite sweatshirt that always smells like her. She was upset, that much was obvious. Well, to you at least. 

“Oh sweetie! I am so glad they finally called you!” your mom said, pulling her in for a hug. You watched her wrap her arms around your mom, wishing, praying it could be you instead. 

“Jakey, it’s Y/N. Can you sit up?” your mom asks. 

You press the button on the remote and the bed sits you up, and you're positive that in your entire life you’d never felt more pathetic, as she watched you come to eye level with her. As your eyes met hers, you could see them tearing up. You hated for her to see you like this, but seeing her is the only thing you’ve wanted since you got here, and you weren’t giving it up for anything.

You looked over to your mom, who was gathering her things with a knowing grin, “I know, I know, I’ll give you two some time. I’ll be downstairs if you need me honey.” she said, walking out and closing the door behind her. 

You watched as Y/N pulled a few items out of her bag, and placed them on the counter. It looked like a change of clothes, but it was so far away you couldn’t really tell. You hoped that meant you were getting out of here soon.

She walked over to the side of the bed, sitting on the edge near your feet. “Hi…” her voice rang out like music.

“Hey…” you breathed. “I’ve been asking for you…”

“I know, they wouldn’t let me come up until they got my negative test…” she replies quietly. “You scared me Jake.”

“I know, I know. I was so stupid, I just thought it was a little cold, and that it would just go away, but it didn’t. I was fine, and then… I don’t know, it happened so quick, and then I was here and you were gone…” you stammer.

“I was scared and Sam and Danny were scared, Josh was scared. We had no idea what was going on. The doctors didn’t know what was wrong. I thought you were dying or something and I couldn’t even come see you…” she said, as a single tear slipped from her eye. 

“I was scared too. Scared this was it…I think I almost lost a lung last night.” you admit.

“Jake…” she says, another tear falling. 

“Don’t cry, please…” you beg, “I’m okay now, I think…I’m feeling a little better.” 

She puts her hands over her eyes trying to conceal her tears and sniffles.

“Come here. Come closer to me.” you ask, watching her slowly shift her body closer. 

You lay your hand on her thigh, as her eyes meet yours. “I’m sorry you thought you were going to lose me. I promise I’m not going anywhere, okay?”

She nods, and continues to blink away her tears. 

“I missed you. All I could think about was you.” you admit.

“Jake, you don’t mean that… You shouldn’t– you should be mad at me, hate me, just two days ago you told m–”

“I know, I remember what I said. I do, and I am mad. But I’ve been laying here, just staring at the ceiling, thinking… of all the things I’d rather be doing than laying here. Wishing you were here…” you say.

“You have…” she questions.

“Yeah. Remember, the other night, you told me all the things you miss about me? Well, I have a list too. I’ve always had a list. I should have told you that night. I really should have, but you’re here now. So now I’m going to tell you, because if I don’t, I think I might burst.” you answer, a smirk crossing your face. 

Her eyes search yours, “Jake, no… you need to rest, you shouldn’t even be talking. It can wait…wait until you’re thinking clearly.”

“No. It can’t. Just let me tell you, please.” you ask.

She nods her head as you move your hand higher on her leg, letting your weak hand squeeze into her thigh.

“I miss the way your mouth subconsciously sings along to the songs I’m practicing when it’s late and I’ve been in my study playing all night…songs you’ve learned just from hearing me play them over and over without even a single complaint…I miss laying in bed and arguing over what show to watch, and me finally caving and letting you pick, only for you to fall asleep on my chest five minutes later…the fuckin’ best…” you see a small smile form on her lips, as you continue.

“I miss hearing you hum along to literally any Beatles song in existence while you cook or while you’re cleaning. It’s always the Beatles. You love The Beatles white album the best…I miss your pancakes… god I would kill for those right now…and yeah, I know it hasn’t even been that long, but it feels like years. I hate it…I miss walking around town with you when the weather is pretty, watching you furiously dig around in your purse looking for cash to give to the buskers. I can’t think of one time that you haven’t given money to someone playing music. Always smiling at me and reminding me ‘that was you once’. You’re right, it was, and even then I loved you.” you go on, feeling her hand rest on top of yours. 

“I miss how you get road rage so easily, but immediately apologize after you say it. I miss taking you and seeing how you are always so nice to servers at restaurants even if they mess something up, because they ‘might just be having a bad day’…I love how much you love your parents, shit and mine too. I love how much you love the ocean, and that we both find the same tranquility on the water. But I really miss the look on your face when you’re watching us play, and knowing that I wouldn’t even look at you when I played your song the other night....I can’t take that back. But just know, next time it's for you.” 

You watch a tear fall down her cheek, as you reach up to swipe it away, pushing her hair over her ear. 

“I swear to god I don’t deserve you, Jake.” She mumbled out. 

“Shhh, stop with that shit.” You said, your already shaky breath catching in your throat as you notice the glint of the silver necklace around her neck.

You let your hand glide over it, seeing the side of it being held together by a small piece of black tape.

Oh no.

“You found it…” you breathe.

She nods defeatedly. “I know you told me not to wear it anymore, and I know I shouldn’t but… I can’t. I feel naked without it. I have been trying to not wear it around you but I saw it in my bag today and…I don’t know I just needed to.” she admits, too nervous to look at you.

“I shouldn’t have done that.” you confess.

“The chain was broken when I found it on the floor, but when you left for Michigan I tried to fix it. It was so small and I could hardly see what I was doing. I think I cried out of frustration more than anything. I just wanted to fix it. Fix one thing. I eventually found some electrical tape in your desk drawer and decided it would have to make due.” she says.

Oh my god, what did you do?

A new pain had crept into your chest but not from your sickness. She was hurting, you knew that. But you had been cruel. Mean just to be mean. You ripped it off of her neck…

“I’m so sorry.” was all you could manage. 

“I deserve everything you’ve said and done.” she whispered standing up and walking away from you to look out the window. 

“You think you can bust me out of here?” you ask, trying to lighten the dreadful mood.

She smiled a little, and shook her head. “No, I think you need to stay. Get better. I brought you some clean clothes though..” she said pointing to the counter. 

“Thank you, though I am enjoying this hospital gown. Very breathable. Might start wearing them for shows.” you smile.

Finally a genuine smile crossed her lips, the most beautiful thing you’d seen in days.

“Come here.” you asked, reaching your hand toward her.

She sat in the chair next to your bed, and placed her elbows on the edge of the bed.

“Why did you want me to come so bad Jake? Why were you asking for me? We aren’t…I thought…” she asks.

You paused, turning on your side to look at her for just a second before you answered. 

“Because…even after everything…You make me feel safe. You feel like home. You are home.” 

A knock at the door startles you both, ripping you away from the moment.

Carson comes in with her laptop cart, ready to do her check of your vitals.

“Oh my gosh! You must be the girlfriend! He has been talking about you all night!” she says.

Damn Carson, give me up why don’t you…

“Oh. No… we aren’t together…” she says, letting her face fall.

You immediately grab her hand and lace your fingers with hers giving her hand a tight squeeze.

“Well, he gave us quite the scare last night!” she says, as Y/N stares off into space.

“Wait, Y/N? You… you were in Sam’s class right?” she asks, catching Y/N’s attention.

“Yeah! Yes, sorry!” she says, refocusing on her. 

“I know we didn’t talk much but I remember you. You and Sam were best friends! I remember you two watching me kick Jake’s ass on the practice fields.” she laughs, tapping on the monitors to check your levels.

“Oh yeah, I guess I do remember that. It’s nice to see you again.” she smiles, pulling her hand from yours. 

“You’re looking good Jake. You’re looking really good. Drastic improvement since my last round. She must be your lucky charm.” she smiles, “You might even get out of here tomorrow if you keep it up.”

“She is.” you smile, looking over at Y/N, who has blushed a deep red. 

“I’ll be back tonight. Keep resting!” she says, letting the door close behind her.

You recline the bed back a bit, letting out a deep breath as the pressure dissipates from your chest. 

“Maybe you should stay laying down. I want you to rest so you can get out of here like she said.” she says, putting her elbows back on the bed. 

“I will… but, I don’t want you to leave yet.” you admit.

“I know, but Josh is here. Do you want to see him?” she asks.

God, Josh…

“Yeah, I need to. But just stay for a few more minutes…please?” you ask.

She nods her head and settles back into the stiff hospital chair, as you turn to your side to face her. 

“I do think you’re my lucky charm you know…” you say.

“I guess I just don’t feel very lucky.” she says. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You ask. 

She took a breath and rested her chin in her hands. “I don’t know, it feels like I’m more like your bad luck charm. So much has happened since I’ve been around, I’ve caused you a lot of unnecessary pain, Jake. And I take responsibility for that.” 

You thought about that for a minute. It wasn’t completely untrue, she had issued you some heartbreak. But knowing what you know now, about everything that happened in Vegas…your intentions with Elle, you felt pretty shitty. And she didn’t even know the extent of it. It was eating you alive not telling her the truth, especially after everything that just happened. But you couldn’t find the right time, she deserved to learn about that when everyone’s worlds weren’t so hectic from you being in this godforsaken hospital. 

“You deserve the world, Jake. And all I’ve done is rip it out from underneath you time and time again. And I’m feeling really horrible about it. Like a really bad human. I’m…working on it. I’m working on myself. I’ve realized some things lately, and I have you to thank for that. I need to grow up a bit, take responsibility for my actions and make better choices.” 

She reached and grabbed for your hand, squeezing it tightly as you took in her words. “Listen, I want you and me to work. I want us to really work out. Okay? Do you get what I’m saying? I know we’re not together at this point, but. I want to make myself the person you need again. Someone you deserve to be with. And to make that happen, I know I’ve got some shit to work on. I’ve got some baggage to unload. I’ve got to get my shit together, Jake. For you. And for me. I know it’s going to take a while, and I know you’ve been saying all these sweet things, but I’m aware of my faults that you don’t need to patch up. I’ve got to. They’re my burden. And it’s time for me to learn how to take care of you now.” 

Wow, what in the world… who is this woman?

You nodded slowly, unable to form a response. Honestly, how do you respond to that? 

“So, I’ve decided since you’re on the mend now and in better than wonderful hands, I’m gonna head back to Nashville since the next few shows are canceled…I hope that last part isn’t news to you…” she said, standing up from the chair. 

“Nah, I figured as much. Fucking pisses me off, I hate cancelling shows more than anything. But, why are you leaving? Why are you going back? We’re all here..” you said. 

“You don’t need me, Jake. Everyone’s going to go home when you’re better, I don’t need to do my job while you’re home with your family.” She went on. 

“Hey listen, Y/N. I know I’ve been so shitty toward you lately. And…I honestly hate myself for it. But I don’t want you to think you’re just an employee to us…did you not, read my text? You are my family, always will be.” You said, sitting up a bit in the bed. 

“Go stay at my parents house. Stay in Michigan, please? Don’t leave…” you reached your hand out for her to grab. She glanced at it, taking it slowly in hers. “You’re not my bad luck charm. You’ve brought me some of the greatest gifts I’ve ever known. I don’t want to be without you when I finally break out of here…okay? Please?” She nodded again, wiping a tear from her cheek. You didn’t want to bring up the fact that Andy was still on the loose, too, and she needed to be with people who could protect her, if need be. 

“Okay. Okay, I’ll go stay with them, if that’s what you want.” she whispered. 

“I do…” you said, giving her a look that said a million words. 

Just then there were three knocks on the door, and Josh was peeking his head inside. “Hey guys…”

You felt her squeeze your hand and look to you with excitement. She was overjoyed you finally got to see your brother now. 

“I’ll see you later…” she said, pulling away. You squeezed her hand harder. 

“Hey, Y/N…” you muttered. She turned back, eyes questioning. “Take care of our family while I’m in here.” 

She smiled wide with her eyes. “I promise.”

You watched as she passed Josh on her walk out, taking him in her arms into a big bear hug. “So good to see you up and at ‘em, Joshy! You okay?”

He nodded. “Better than yesterday, will be better tomorrow.” He said, rubbing her arms as she made her way to the door. 

“Heyyyyy asshole. How did I end up in here and you didn’t? Not fuckin’ fair…” you said, voice still gravely. 

He walked over and took the seat Y/N had just been in, kicking himself back with his hands behind his head. “Guess it’s because I’m the more powerful twin, obviously.”

The two of you laughed and caught up with each other, you only being attacked with a few coughs along the way. 

“I’m sorry we had to cancel some shows, it’s my most unfavorite thing on earth.” you admitted. 

“I know, mine too. But it’s okay, I know you wouldn’t have made it through. We aren’t mad at you.” He went on before leaning forward on his elbows. “Jake, ahh. You know your road to recovery isn’t gonna be a short one, right? You had a very serious illness, and it’s not just gonna go away overnight.”

“Yeah, I’m aware. What are you getting at?” You answered. 

“Well, we were all talking, me Sam and Dan, and Richard and your doctors and everyone…we think maybe we should take some time. Step back and let you heal like you need to.” He said, voice stern. 

“NO, Josh. I’m fine. We have like, fifty shows this tour, we can’t start canceling them already. I will be fine, I’m already feeling so much better.” You argued. 

“I talked to Jay from Rival Sons, we tried to come up with a solution to even maybe play together, take some of the main effort off of you, but then we all agreed that wouldn’t work either.” He said, grazing his mouth with his hand. 

“No, not ‘that wouldn’t work’. I would never agree to that!  It’s all or nothing for our shows from now on, remember? And I can give it my all, I promise Josh. I can do it. I can’t let everybody down. You guys, the crew, the fans…god. They’ve all already got tickets and planes and hotels–”

“Jake, listen. It’s already done. Sam, Daniel and I had to make an executive decision. I’m sorry. We’re picking back up in Brazil.” 

“Brazil?! That’s in like, over a month! I don’t need that long, Josh! Tell them nevermind. I can be there.”

“Jake, stop. Listen, you’re going to be healing for weeks, you’re going to have debris in your lungs for a long time. You’re still gonna have all these side effects…tiredness, a cough, dizziness, all that. And they said it could come back if you don’t allow yourself time to heal completely. You have to allow yourself that, or else…you could end up worse and we have to cancel the rest of the tour. Okay?” He said. “And I don’t need you worse, I need you better. 100%.”

“I will be, I swear. I’m already getting there. Don’t worry about me…” you spat, feeling aggravated. 

“Don’t worry about you?! Really Jake? All I’ve done for the past three days is worry myself sick about you. Hell, I could hardly breathe myself and I wasn’t even half as bad off as you were! Laying in that damn hotel bed not able to leave or call you, no one had answers and no one knew what was wrong with you. Do you know how that felt for me? Telling me not to worry about you, fuck off. You know I feel all your shit, too.” Josh said, bringing his hands in for animation. 

“You didn’t need to worry about me, Josh, damn. I’m in a hospital in good hands…they–”

“Yeah no shit! And the doctors didn’t know what was wrong with you for a good bit of time! Sam kept us up on your state, and he didn’t tell me, but I think something really bad happened to you. I can just tell he’s not telling us the whole story. Am I right?” He went on. 

You swallowed. Your memory was fuzzy, but yeah…you think something did happen. And Sam was here for it. You stayed quiet, truly unsure how to answer, because you didn’t remember much. So you just nodded. 

“I thought so. I was worried sick, Jake. I was so scared you weren’t gonna…no one was telling me anything cause they didn’t want to upset me, make me feel worse…I thought you might not make it back to me.” He said, completely vulnerable. 

Shit. 

“Brother, you know I wasn’t going anywhere, hell. They were taking good care of me here. You know I’m not going anywhere without you, we’re going out the same way we came in, remember? You shoving me out of the way to get there first…but I’ll be following you close behind.” You said, trying to offer him some solace. 

“I know, I know. But you know how your brain works when you’re helpless and sick, it wanders off to scary places. I was trying to communicate mentally with you, begging you to please stay… I just, started thinking how fuckin’ scary that would be, if you weren’t here with me anymore. In my fever dream state it felt real, and it was shit. Okay?” He rambled. 

You laughed a little. 

“What, asshole?” He barked. 

“You really love me, don’t ya Josh?” You teased. 

“Of course I love you, you idiot.” He smiled. “Just don’t ever fuckin’ scare me like that again, understood? I’m not dealing with Sam’s shit by myself for the rest of my life.” 

You laughed again. “Alright, damn. I promise.”

“Where is Y/N? I figured she’d be back by now…” he asked, looking at the clock on the wall. 

You shook your head. “I don’t think she’s coming back tonight, Josh.”

“What? Why?”

You took as deep a breath as you could. Might as well break the news now. “Things with us are…delicate right now. I fucked up. Well, we both fucked up, actually.”

“You’re kidding me. I knew something felt weird. What happened?” He asked. 

You nodded your head to the bedside table. “Gimmie my phone.” He did, and you unlocked it, scrolling to the text thread with Elle, “Just read this.”

You watched as he silently scrolled, his eyes growing ten times in size every few seconds as he read. “What the…what the fuck?” 

Finally he handed you your phone back. “What the hell, Jake? You were going to sleep with Elle?! When did this happen? Why didn’t I know about this?”

You decided to lay the entire story out for him, beginning to end, detail by detail. He was going to find out the hard way, anyway. What you were left with at the end was his face in utter disbelief. 

“God damnit, Jacob. What kind of fuckery…” 

“I know. It’s a shitshow. But, things are alright, I guess. I just had to get pneumonia before I could really kick Sam’s ass. But Elle doesn’t know they slept together, so please, let Sam deal with that on his own. We’ve all done a lot of soul searching these past few weeks, I can tell you that.” You told him. 

“All this time, you’ve known? And you’ve been okay being around Sam?” He asked. 

“Yep. Y/N and I have been lying to all of you. I had to hang it up, put it away for the sake of the band. It’s been fucking terrible.” You relented, feeling a cough coming on. 

“I’m fucking furious, Jake. At him, at Y/N…all of you. You and Elle? Really?” He seethed. 

You nodded. “I almost did it, Josh. I really did. It almost fucking happened. And Y/N was okay with it. Wild, I know. But then your drunk ass called me to come rescue you.”

“Saved by the bell?” He said. 

“Hah, I guess. Fuckin’ always cockblocking me since we were teenagers...” You clicked your tongue. “I never did that shit to you.”

“You never had to, jackass!” 

You continued your normal conversation, going on about life and what the fuck you were going to do with it. You told Josh that you told him all of that in confidence, and as mad as he was, he agreed to go along with the act until things went back to normal. 

He left, leaving you in your bed to rest a while while he went back down to the lobby. You laid there for a long time, running over everything that had occurred in the past couple of hours. Y/N, telling you she wanted to work on things. Wanted you to work out for real. It gave you a little bit of hope that she didn’t hate you like you thought she would. But still you knew deep down that you both needed time apart. It had to happen, whether you wanted it to or not. 

The canceled tour was ripping you apart. You felt the need to apologize to everyone, tell the fans you were so sorry. You decided that when you got home, you would. And you knew exactly how you’d do it. 

You grabbed the remote from behind your head and turned on the tiny TV across the room, flipping through the channels to find something, anything to take your mind off of being in here. Carson came in a while later, startling you from a sleep you didn’t realize you were in. 

“Hey, hey! Sorry I woke you. Just gonna check some things out. Can you sit up for me?” She said. 

You pushed through every ache and pain your body presented you with while you brought yourself to sit, the weight of your lungs still heavy. 

She pressed her stethoscope to your chest and back and had you breathe deeply a few times. 

“Definitely getting better, you don’t sound nearly as raspy as you did. I’m going to give you your next dose of antibiotics through your IV now. And when you’re all through these next few doses and your levels stay up, we can remove the IV. Sound good?” She said while she recorded your blood pressure. “Then you’ll move to a round of them in pill form.”

“Sounds great. Just lovely.” You said, defeatedly.

“I’m surprised you even found somewhere to put my IV in that hand, busted up as it is.” You said, lifting your right hand and inspecting it. 

“Yeah, you were so dehydrated I couldn’t find a vein in your arms at all. Hand to resort to your hand. I noticed it’s been through some things…” she said, noting all your scars. 

“Yeah, my other arm has scars from both times I broke it, but these…all these little ones…” 

She looked closer, seeing all the little places that shards of glass had ended up that night so long ago at the bar. 

“Geez, there are tons. What did you do?” She asked. 

“Shattered glass beer bottle. Had a rough time fending off some jackass one night.” You said. “Still hurts sometimes.”

“I’d say it does. I hope you won…” she said, flicking her eyes to you. 

“I like to think I did.” You smiled, huffing loudly and readjusting yourself. 

“You hate it in here, don’t you?” She asked. 

“Eh, I’d rather be on my way to our next show right now, that’s for sure. But thank you for taking care of me. You’ve really been a light during my whole stay here.” You relented, feeling thankful that she ended up as your nurse. 

“No problem, Jake. You’ve been an excellent patient. And it was good catching up with an old friend again. I don’t get to do that much.” She said, smiling as she pulled a strand of hair behind her ear. 

“Did I really give you a scare last night?” You asked. 

She nodded. “Yeah, you did. Your vitals started crashing kinda fast. You weren’t knocking on heaven’s door or anything, but. It could have gone south fast if you weren’t here already.” She clicked a few times on her computer. “We had to call in the respiratory team. You tested my training after we left this room, and your brother's sanity, that’s for sure.”

Damn, Sam must have been just as scared as you were…

You smiled at her sudden nervousness. She leaned over you to fluff your pillow behind you. As she pulled away, your hands brushed together on the bed sheets. She decided not to move it. 

Your eyes quickly flitted up to meet hers. “Did you save me, Miss Carson Neely?” 

She giggled, shyly looking away. “No, Mr. Jacob Kiszka, me and my team saved you.” 

You felt a strange wave of something sweet fly through your body, a new, light, buzzing sensation that your brain hadn’t felt in a long time. 

She gathered her things onto the cart and began to walk away. “Just think, only a couple more days in here, and you won’t have to see my face everyday anymore.” She opened the door and began to back out. “And how did you know my Instagram name?” She left, winking secretly as the door clanked shut. 

You were left stunned. You quickly grabbed your phone, opening the app and typing in the search box. 

misscarsonneely

Follow. 

HER POV

As you step out into the lobby you see the family sitting in the same place you left them, although this time they look a lot happier, with smiles on all of their faces. As you approach they wave you over as excitedly as possible.

“Were you up there when they told him?” Karen asks.

“Told him what?” you ask.

“His doctor just came down here and told us that if he continues to improve overnight they will release him tomorrow or the next day!” Karen says. 

“Oh gosh. I hope so. I know he is tired of being here.” you reply. 

“So I was talking to Kelly, I think we are gonna checkout of the hotel and head home in the morning. I want to wash his sheets and clean up the house some. Oh, and go to the grocery store…” she pauses. “Do you want to ride with us, or?” she asks.

“Oh, um, yeah I can ride with you guys in the morning. I just need to pack up our stuff tonight I guess.” you reply.

“We’re going to head back to the hotel now, do you want to come or stay here?” she asks, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“I drove here, so I will follow you guys.” you answer.

“Me and Sammy and Danny are gonna stay here and wait for Josh, then we will probably head back too.” Elle says, trying to reassure you.

“Okay. Just…text me if anything happens, I guess.” you smile.

She winks at you and you wave bye to Sam and Danny as you follow Karen and Kelly out the doors. 

—

Tapping your keycard to the door you step into the hotel room, grateful that you already cleaned up a little bit earlier in the day. You tossed your things onto the dresser and flopped down onto your bed. You grabbed your phone and rolled to your side trying to catch up on all of the calls and texts you’d received in the last few days. 

You click on your thread with Karen, confirming plans to leave in the morning, and realize that you need to finish packing everything up. With a groan you roll off the bed and drag yourself over to your suitcase, setting out fresh clothes for tomorrow and collecting the rest of your things. 

As you zip your suitcase, you make your way over to his, opening it and beginning to refold everything and trying to organize it better than it currently was. Bringing a couple of his shirts to your face you breathe him in, a smell you miss desperately. A tear pricks at your eye as you remember everything he said today. He misses you too. 

Collecting his toiletries you walk them back to his suitcase and place the bag inside. The tiny white bag catches your eye again, and you try to ignore it. Pretend you never saw it. But, you did. You grabbed it, and pulled it out, walking over to the desk and situating yourself in the chair. You slide the ring out of the bag and in an act of pure insanity, slid it onto your finger. 

You held your hand out, admiring how perfect it looked on your finger as a hot tear rolled down your cheek. You stare at it, and again wonder if he really was going to propose. When he would have done it. How he would have done it…where did this ring even come from? 

You pull yourself up from the desk and continue packing his suitcase, the extra weight on your finger feeling like a thousand pounds. When everything was packed away you walked back over to the desk, giving your hand one last look before sliding the ring off and putting it back in the bag. You tuck it away at the bottom of the suitcase, hoping he would think you never even saw it. But you did. And now you’d never forget. 

—

As you slid into bed later that night, you grabbed the TV remote flipping through channels, hoping for something that would take your mind off of him. But instead you found yourself settling on The Food Network, because you know that’s what he would have picked. Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives lights up the screen and you suddenly feel as if you’re back home with Jake.

You grabbed your phone from the nightstand and opened your texts looking for your last message with him. You open the camera and snap a picture of the darkened room, with just the TV as the focus, hoping he will see what you’re watching. You attach the photo to the text and press send.

You

10:44pm: *Attachment*

10:44pm: It’s not the same without you… 

You set your phone down on the nightstand, knowing he is probably asleep, or just wont respond. You wouldn’t blame him. You watch for a few minutes as you learn about a Mexican restaurant in El Paso, silently wondering if you’d ever go to El Paso…

Your phone buzzes on the nightstand and you grab it as quickly as you can, hoping it was him. 

Jake

10:56pm: *Attachment*

10:56pm: I know…

Tears fill your eyes not only because he did reply, but his response, which included a photo of his view from his hospital bed, where he was watching the exact same thing.

You swiped your hand over your eyes as you replied.

You

10:59pm: Do you think we’ll ever go to El Paso?

Jake

11:00pm: I think we have to now...

You snapped another photo, of his suitcase zipped and ready next to his guitar case as they laid on his bed. 

You

11:04pm: *Attachment*

11:04pm: Ready for you to come home.

Jake

11:06pm: Me too baby

Baby? You feel your insides practically melt away reading the simple text again and again. 

You

11:10pm: See you soon…

Jake

11:11pm: Not soon enough.

You fall asleep that night with a warm feeling in your chest. Maybe there was hope. You knew you both needed time, and you’d gladly give him that. It was the least you could do. But you knew you would also give him every drop of love you had, and maybe, just maybe that would be enough to help the two of you weather this storm. 

JAKE POV

It was late when your eyes shot open, still blurry from the sleep filling them and the dim light of the room. You rolled over on the hard plastic-like pillow, the sheets scratching you as you twisted. You glanced at the clock, 2:20am. Blah. Only a few more hours until they come in to check your vitals and give you more antibiotics. You flipped to your side, hugging the extra pillow they’d given you, when something sitting in the chair caught your eye. 

What the hell is that? 

You flipped the overhead light on, illuminating the room with a buzzing fluorescent glow. 

It’s…a guitar?

You sat up, reaching hard to grab the neck of it, noticing a small note tucked between the strings. You unfolded it, turning it toward the light. 

Congratulations on beating bacterial pneumonia!

Thought you’d like to borrow this to get through your last day…

Don’t beat her up too much ;)

-Carson 

Holy shit, this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you. You tucked the note onto the table beside you, and laid back down on the bed. You grasped the old acoustic, feeling its weight in your hands sit just right. You positioned your hands just so, and strummed a light chord. My god, the joy you felt. This was probably the longest you’d gone without holding a guitar in your hands since before you were a teenager. You tilted your head back and let out a tiny howl at the sound of it, before tuning it up just a tad. 

You had no idea how much you missed it, the feeling of your absolute favorite object in the world in your hands. Your means of communication. Your way to make an honest living. Your tool for storytelling. One of the only things that was constant for the entirety of your life so far. She’d never let you down. 

And Carson had given it to you. Well, let you borrow it, at least. You continued playing quietly until the sun was peeking through the curtains, giving the room a dull blue tint. Your fingers were starting to ache from being out of practice for the past few days, but you welcomed the feeling. The true attachment you had with this instrument was unending. 

You grabbed your phone, opening Instagram to your direct messages. You found Carson, sending her a quick message. 

You: Thank you for the loan, I haven’t been this happy in days

To your surprise, she answered. 

Carson: Not a problem at all. How does she play?

You: Perfectly. Could use a new set of strings, though ;)

Carson: Ah, I bet it does. I haven’t picked it up in quite some time. Promise, I’ll get some new ones asap

You: See you soon?

Carson: I’ll be there to sign your discharge papers :)

You locked your phone, letting your mind drift as your fingers grazed the strings again. You closed your eyes, watching as the music floated from your fingertips directly along with the colorful waves behind your eyelids. 

Oh, shit…

You grabbed your phone again, sending Josh a quick text. 

You:

5:48am: Hey, when you come pick me up later, can you have Sam get you a new thing of acoustic strings and bring them with you? Thanks please don’t forget.

Right as the sun began to hit your face, the warmth making your skin tingle, you began to think about Y/N asleep by herself, probably still worried about you. You thought about everything she’d said, how horribly you’d treated her lately…your heart started to ache. The guilt of not telling her about Elle began pulling at your insides. You were tearing yourself up, you’d waited all your life for her, and right when you both were in a perfect spot, twisted fate came in and ripped it away. 

But she had been there all day. All week. By your side. Your fingers began to play a tune you’d never heard before, never played before…light and solemn, but happy at the same time. You memorized it, writing the notes down mentally. This sounds good… You promised yourself that you’d make it work this time. You had to, you didn’t have any other choice. You hoped to god that she intended to stay this time. 

You drifted off to sleep still playing that tune, letting the guitar slip from your hands as you slept, dreaming of finally seeing your girl tomorrow.

HER POV

The ride from Saginaw to Frankemuth was short, only half an hour at most, and you spent most of the drive laughing with Kelly and Karen about the funny things your parents got into with them before you were born. 

You knew all you could do was laugh, otherwise you’d all cry about how scary things were with Jake. You hadn’t received any updates about Jake since yesterday afternoon before you left the hospital. You hoped that no news was good news, but still, another word of reassurance wouldn’t hurt. 

As you pulled into their driveway, Kelly unloaded your bags and brought them up to Jake’s room. You and Karen made a plan for the day of the things you knew you both wanted to get done before you picked up Jake tomorrow, god willing. 

You spent most of the day assisting Karen in cleaning up, doing some of Jake’s laundry, and putting fresh sheets on his bed. You two also made a trip to the grocery store, picking up a few of his favorite things. 

It was weird being in his house without him, let alone his bedroom surrounded by his things. But you embraced it. You loved him, and all you wanted was for him to come home to you. Even if it was in a different way than before.

Around 5:00 Karen got a call that he would be discharged tomorrow, and to pick him up around noon. The house was filled with happiness and joy, but also, a bit of nervousness as none of you knew what to expect with his recovery. 

You helped Karen make a huge batch of chicken noodle soup, and later that night the three of you sat around the table testing the recipe. 

“Perfect as always, my love.” Kelly said, grabbing Karen's hand. 

You felt a shock shoot through your body. Your mind flashing to a memory of Jake saying those exact words, and sounding the exact same. You wondered if you’d ever hear those words again. 

After dinner you excused yourself to bed, ready to take a shower and get a good night's sleep before your long and emotional day tomorrow. You took extra time in the shower, letting the hot water soothe your tired muscles, and relax you enough that you would fall right asleep. 

You pulled on your favorite t-shirt and a pair of his old sweatpants and slid into his bed, wishing so badly he was there next to you. You thought of him, alone at the hospital and sighed. You hadn’t heard a word from him all day, so with the rest of the courage you had, you grabbed your phone and sent him a text. 

You opened your thread with him, and hit the camera button, snapping a picture of you curled up on his pillow, and hit send. 

You

9:47pm: *Attachment*

Jake

9:49pm: My shirt, in my bed? That’s just mean…

You

9:50pm: Clean sheets too. All to myself…

Jake

9:51pm: *Attachment*

9:51pm: This is what they are calling a pillow.

You smile as you open the photo to see Jake, laying on a flattened out piece of cotton wrapped in plastic. 

You

9:52pm: Lol, don’t worry, tomorrow you can have all of these to yourself…

9:52pm: *Attachment*

You laugh, sending him a photo of both of the pillows on his bed, looking fluffy and full.

Jake

9:54pm: Then what will you sleep on?

You

9:55pm: I don’t know, one of the pillows on the basement pull out couch.

Jake

9:56pm: No, I can probably share. Just this once…

Jake

9:57pm: What are you doing?

You

9:58pm: Rifling around your room looking for treasures…

Jake

9:59pm: Hmm, want to go on a scavenger hunt?

You

10:00pm: Okay…

Jake

10:01pm: Alright, get out of my bed and walk over to the desk

You

10:02pm: Okay I’m here…

Jake

10:03pm: Okay, open the second drawer from the bottom.

You

10:04pm: Done

Jake

10:03: Okay in the very bottom of the drawer there should be a little brown cardboard box

You

10:05pm: Yes, I see it.

Jake

10:06pm: Look inside.

Pulling the box from the drawer you open it and see it filled with CD’s. You pull one of the jewel cases out and smile. Their very first CD. You grab the next one, different from the first. Flipping through four of five untitled CD’s before getting to one you recognized, Oh, Live from Detroit, I remember that…I think I was there…

You

10:10pm: Wow, is this every single one?

Jake

10:11pm: Yeah, should be. I’m pretty sure some of those are like, the only copies in existence anymore.

You

10:12pm: Is there a CD player in here? I have to listen to these.

Jake

10:13pm: Nope. Ready to see my most favorite treasure?

You

10:15pm: Yes

Jake

10:16pm: Okay, walk over to my dresser

You

10:17pm: Here

Jake

10:18pm: Ok you see all the photos stacked in the corner?

You

10:19pm: Yes

Jake

10:18pm: Okay, ignore those. Instead, look up.

You look up and are met with your reflection in the mirror. You. You are his treasure. You aren’t even sure what to say. You just stare at the screen of your phone as you feel your heart flutter.

Jake

10:20pm: It’s true. You are my most favorite treasure. 

You swallow back the lump in your throat and walk back over to the bed, sliding in once again and snuggling up to his pillow. 

You

10:22pm: You know you’re mine too, Jake…

He doesn't respond and you figure he probably fell asleep, and you weren’t too far behind him. You place your phone on the nightstand and turn off the lamp, ready to let sleep take you away when you hear it buzz again. 

Jake

11:01pm: Remember when we used to sneak out of my window and sit on the roof and smoke so my parents wouldn’t know?

You

11:03pm: Lol yes and I was always afraid we were going to get too high and fall off.

Jake

11:05pm: You know I’d never let anything happen to you.

You

11:07pm: I know…

Jake

11:09pm: Wish we could go back.

You

11:07pm: There’s a lot of things I wish I could go back and redo.

Jake

11:11pm: All part of the journey babe, good or bad.

You

11:13pm: More bad than good…

Jake

11:14pm: And I’m still here…

You

11:16pm: But it’s not the same.

Jake

11:18pm: Not yet.

You

11:20pm: But maybe?

Jake

11:21pm: Definitely maybe

You

11:23pm: Then maybe I can make you pancakes and sing Sam Cooke with you?

Jake

11:25pm: God I fuckin’ hope so baby.

You

11:27pm: Me too. 

Jake

11:30pm: Enjoy that bed to yourself while you can…

You

11:31pm: Like it better when you’re here.

Jake

11:32pm: Me too. Goodnight babe

You

11:33pm: Night Jake ❤️

You placed your phone on the nightstand, hugging his pillow tightly to your chest, letting out a breath it felt like you'd been holding in for weeks. And as you fell asleep, you let yourself believe that things might actually be okay. 

—

You tapped your fingers nervously on the arm of the couch, you were ready to go, and you had been for nearly two hours. The clock ticking by slower than it ever has. The hospital called again this morning to confirm Jake’s discharge, and Josh was planning to meet you there and ride back with the three of you. 

“You ready to go get your man?” Karen asked jokingly.

You laughed nervously, “Yeah, I think he did his time.” you replied as you followed her out the door. 

The ride to the hospital was nervous but hopeful, you and Karen chatting about the weather and anything else you could think of, but the closer you got the more the nerves set in. Things between you and Jake had taken a drastic turn in the past two days, talking more than you had in the past few weeks. 

As you stepped into the hospital and made your way to the elevator, Josh greeted you with hugs and ‘hellos’.

“Have you been waiting long?” you asked.

“No, not really, had to come up here earlier actually, Jake needed guitar strings? I don’t know. I didn’t ask, came and brought them up and they were getting ready to start his discharge. Checked out of my hotel room and just got here a few minutes ago.” he said.

Guitar strings?

The three of you rode the elevator up to the fourth floor and you took a deep breath as Josh knocked on his door. 

Seconds later the door was opening, and for the first time in days you saw Jake behind it. 

“Wow, honey you are looking better!” Karen said, pulling him in for a hug. As he hugged her back his eyes met yours, looking much more lively than just a day ago. 

“You ready to get the fuck out of here?” Josh joked.

“Hell yes, what took you guys so long?” he laughed.

With Karen and Josh looking to you now, you stepped forward towards him as he reached his arms out to you. He wrapped his arms tightly around you like it was the only thing tethering him to earth. His face buried into your neck breathing you in as he pressed a kiss to your cheek. 

“God, I am so glad to see you.” he said. Part of you wondering if he meant it or if this was part of his act. 

He pulled away quickly as a cough shook through his chest, not nearly as bad as it was, but still not great. 

“Alright alright, let's get you home and back into bed. You’re not healed yet, son.” Karen said playfully.

He nodded and grabbed his few items, before stepping through the door and grabbing your hand in his. 

“Hey, thanks for the serenade all night, that’s a story I’ll be able to tell my grandkids one day.” The guy at the nurses station said, saluting Jake as you left. 

“Tell them you listened to me write a new song in a hospital bed!” he responded. 

“Did you really write something new?” Josh asked, leaning in close. 

“Sure did. It’s pretty sweet…think you’ll like it, too.” he said, looking over to you, his sweet grin filling your stomach with butterflies as he squeezed your hand. 

You were completely unaware that the emotions he came to terms with while laying in that bed inspired something beautiful and brand new. 

The two of you walked hand in hand to the elevator, taking the short ride down to the lobby with Karen and Josh. 

As you loaded into the car Josh joined Karen up front and Jake sat in the back with you. Each of you sat on your respective sides of the car, casting glances at each other every few seconds. You could hardly tear your eyes away from him, dressed in your most favorite item in the world. You wondered if he really meant it all those days ago when he said it wasn't his favorite. That he was going to donate it. You hoped he wouldn’t, and thankfully he didn’t.

He talked to Karen and Josh most of the drive home, but still he would look at you, the color back in his face and a small smile on his lips. 

He stretched his arm over the headrests, letting his hand fall at the nape of your neck. His fingers gently dusting the skin there as he continued to talk. Your mind began swirling with the memory of the last time you felt his touch this way. So soft and gentle. You looked over at him meeting his eyes as his thumb pressed into your skin letting you know he was thinking the same things you were.

Minutes later you were pulling into the driveway and making your way up to the front door. Sam and Elle had arrived while you were gone and were happy to see Jake in better condition. You ushered Jake upstairs, knowing he still needed tons of rest and that it was almost time for his next dose of antibiotics. He agreed, slowly making his way upstairs to his bedroom as you followed behind him. 

JAKE POV

She shuts the door behind her and leans against it as you walk over to your suitcase, laying open on the floor. You pick up a t-shirt noticing its soft texture and folded state. You pull it to your nose breathing in the scent and feeling your body physically relax. 

“Did you wash my clothes?” You ask, looking over to her still leaning against the door. 

Her eyes flick up to yours nervously, “Oh, um yes.”

You bring the shirt to your nose again breathing it in. Smells just like her.

“How does it– it smells just like you?” you question.

“Your mom and I went to the store yesterday. I picked up the laundry soap we use at home, thought it might…I don’t know, make you feel better or something.” she answers.

You stand up from your suitcase, throwing the shirt over your shoulder and walking over to her. You grab her hands and pull her into your arms, wrapping them tightly around her. Her arms snake around your back, her hands gripping into you as the two of you stand there breathing each other in. 

“Thank you.” you whisper. 

“You’re welcome…” she replies. 

You release her, stepping back and just looking at her. Really looking at her. You can tell she is nervous. After the way you’d treated her the last few weeks, you’d be nervous around you too. 

You pull off the flannel and toss it into the suitcase, pulling the black t-shirt over your head and pulling on the one you’d grabbed from your suitcase. You kicked off your jeans and threw your phone onto the bed, as she turned away.

You sat down on the edge of the bed, as you turned your attention back to her. “Hey, c’mere…”

She walked over to you, as her phone buzzed in her back pocket. She pulled it out, and looked at the screen before her eyes flashed to you.

“Time for your meds…” she said.

“Oh, are you my nurse?” you asked playfully.

“For now, though I am probably not as qualified as Carson.” she laughed.

Shit. Did she know?

“Your mom and I made chicken noodle soup for you yesterday. Do you want some? Then you can take your medicine?” she asks.

“You made it?” you ask.

“Well, yeah. Me and your mom. It’s your moms recipe, I just helped.” she admits. 

A smile crosses your face, “Yes. Please.”

“Okay, stay here. I will be back in a few.” she says, disappearing through the door.

Just ask her when she comes back. It’s just Y/N. Why are you so nervous?

A few minutes later as you’re laid back on your pillows your bedroom door opens and you see Y/N and Elle carrying in all kinds of things. 

“Brought you lunch! And snacks! Heard they were starving you in there!” Elle says. 

“I think prison food would have tasted better.” you laugh.

“Well this should be good, especially if Y/N made it.” she smiles.

“I just helped! I swear I didn’t do anything special!” she interjects.

“Sure you did. You made it for Jake right?” she asks.

A puzzled look crosses Y/N’s face, “Yeah?”

“So it was made with love. That makes everything special.” she says, scampering back through the bedroom door, shutting it behind her. 

Y/N places the bowl of soup, crackers, and water for you at your desk, motioning for you to come over. You stand up from the bed and walk over, mouth already watering just from the smell alone. You sit down and turn to her, as she places the two white pills in your hand. 

“I will be downstairs if you…need anything. You can just text me or whoever…” she says, backing up towards the door.

“You’re leaving?” you ask.

“Well, I figur–”

“You figured wrong. Stay…Hang out with me for a little bit?” you ask.

“Are you…sure?” she asks.

“Find a movie for us to watch?” you offer.

A smile slides across her face and she tries to stifle it back. She kicks off her shoes and grabs some clothes from her suitcase, running off to the bathroom to change. Minutes later she is walking back into your room in a t-shirt and a pair of shorts. You swallow nervously as you take her in. Your favorite girl.

She grabs the TV remote, climbing into your bed and nestling herself into the blankets. You have a hard time keeping the smile from your own face, knowing it would be mere minutes until you were there next to her.

—

You were nervous to crawl into bed with her, but you knew once you were there everything would fall into place. It always did. You slid into the bed, pulling the familiar blankets up over your body, as she hit play on the movie. 

You rolled to your side looking up at her, deeply invested in the movie starting on the tiny screen across the room. You had no idea what movie she picked and honestly you didn’t care. The medicine you had to take made it hard for you to keep your eyes open for longer than five minutes at a time. It had been too long since you were able to just relax with her. Not a care in the world, just you and her and that's it. 

“You want this, or do I get to use it?” she smiles, offering you the pillow behind her.

You smiled back, “You can use it, but I have the freedom to change my mind at any moment.” you say playfully. She lays down into it, closing her eyes as she breathes you in. Her eyes reopen and look at you as her hand suddenly comes up towards your face. 

Her fingers gently glide over your top lip, “I kind of like the mustache Jake. It’s…I don’t know…It’s hot.”

“I couldn’t shave in the hospital, been a few days. You like it?” you ask.

Her fingers run over it again, lingering for an extra second, “Yeah. I do. Maybe you should try it out.” she smiles.

“I don’t know, maybe.” you reply, rolling to your back.

A cough rips through your chest as you turn away from her, but you feel her hand press to your chest, warm and soft even through your thin t-shirt.

You roll back with a sigh, wondering how long this cough will stick around. 

“You know, I kind of feel like this is partly my fault.” she said resting her face on her arm. 

“What? No? Why?” you question.

“The other day, in the hotel room, you were kind of out of it, coughing here and there, kept getting headaches…I asked you if you were sick and you said no, but I knew you were. I should have made you go to the doctor sooner.” she says quietly.

You roll towards her, letting your feet graze against hers, “I shouldn’t have pretended that I was okay. Just, with everything that was going on, I couldn’t deal with that too. It caught up with me though. I was stupid for thinking it wouldn’t.”

“Thank you, for taking me to the hospital though… I…am glad you were there, in the room with me. I’m glad I didn’t move you to your own room.” you admit.

Her foot slides against your leg, sending a shiver through your body, “I did. I changed all the rest of our hotel bookings for the rest of the tour. I got my own room so you didn’t have to be near me.”

“Why?” you ask, unsure you even wanted to hear the answer.

“Because you’ve spent the past two weeks showing me that’s exactly what you wanted.” she says, driving a dagger straight through your heart.

You grab her arm pulling her to lay on your chest as you wrap your arms around her. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I know I was mean. I didn’t want to be, I was just…hurting. I shouldn’t have said those things. They aren’t even true.”

“No, I deserved it. I still do.” she says, cheek to your chest.

“Will you just, lay here with me?” you ask, into her hair.

“Am I allowed to touch you?” she whispers.

“Of course you can touch me, baby.” you answer, completely shocked that she thinks she needs to ask. 

Her hand snakes up under your shirt, resting on your chest. You can tell by her urgency that she had probably been thinking about it for a long time. You knew laying with you like this was one of her favorite things in the world. Her fingers rubbed small paths over your skin, almost like she was re-familiarizing herself with your body. You missed the way her skin felt on yours, and if it was up to you, you wouldn’t move from this spot for the next three days.

It was quiet between the two of you for a while, just the gentle rise and fall of your hand on her shoulder as she breathed. The movie continued to play across the room, but neither of you were watching it. You knew that both of you had fallen into a deep spiral of what exactly had happened between the two of you that you’d ended up here, together, but not at all.

—

The two of you later found yourselves seated around the kitchen table as your mom finished cleaning up dinner, finding that the extra long nap earlier had you waking up feeling even better than you had this morning. Part of you wondered if it was because Y/N was wrapped around you, or maybe just the new medicine you’d been given. Either way, you were starting to get into better spirits, even given your current situation.

“Our flight is leaving tomorrow, Daniel’s too.” Sam said, leaning back in the old wooden kitchen chair.

“Sammy do not lean in my chairs, the rules have not changed!” your mom yelled from across the kitchen. 

You lifted your middle finger, flipping him off with a shit eating smile as he rolled his eyes and sat back down. He scoffed and flipped you off with both hands cutting his eyes at you.

“Samuel Francis!” your mom yelled, peeking her head around the corner seeing Sam with two middle fingers in the air.

“No! That was to Jake, not to you!” he said, trying to explain. You let a small laugh leave your chest as you watched him get scolded.

“Don’t let me see that again…” she said pointing at him and returning to the kitchen.

“Fuck you Jake…” he muttered under his breath.

“No, fuck you, Sam.” you replied with a grin.

“Annnnyways….I’m probably gonna stay here with Jake, someone has to drive his ass home, and I’m not making Y/N do it.” Josh says.

“What! I can do it!” she interjects.

“I know you can, but I need you to watch him while I’m driving. I can't be chauffeur and nurse.” he laughs.

“When do you think you’ll be ready to head back?” he asks.

“Probably, like…another day or so? I am feeling way better. I could probably drive, honestly.” you say but are met with a resounding ‘No’ from everyone seated around the table.

“Jake, you can barely keep your eyes open.” she smiles.

“Okay, so tentatively the day after tomorrow…”Josh says.

“Yeah, I think so. Y/N?” you ask.

“Yeah, whatever you guys want.” she answers, as you slide your hand to rest on her leg. You feel her hand grab yours and give it a tight squeeze before she stands up and walks into the kitchen.

Sam and Elle follow after her, leaving you and Josh to sit at the table. 

“I think I would kill a man for a beer.” you say.

He laughs, and pats you on the shoulder, “Damn, you are feeling better, huh?”

You nod and send him a smile.

“I’m glad. Was scared there for a minute.” he admits.

“You can’t get rid of me, fucker…” you laugh.

Y/N walks back in with a glass of water and another handful of pills, handing you both, as she watches you take them. 

“Gonna go take a shower, don’t stay down here too long or I’m starting the next episode without you.” she says, with a smirk.

“I’ll be up in a bit.” you say, squeezing her hand as she walked away and disappeared up the stairs.

“So, are you two like…good now?” he asks.

“I mean, no. I haven’t even told her about Elle yet. Gonna wait until we get home. I just… I spent the last two weeks being a complete dick to her. Hated her, or– what she did to me. Said some really fucked up shit to her, then I found out what happened with me and Elle, and knew I fucked up. Knew I overreacted. That morning I was going to try to start being nice to her again, but then, next thing I knew I was in the fucking hospital. I spent the entire time I was in the hospital thinking about her. I fucking love her man, that shit doesn’t just go away. As much as I wanted to hate her and never talk to her again, when that alert thing started going off and I couldn’t breathe…when I thought I was about to fuckin’ die… It was her. I know it’s always going to be her.” you pause as he nods his head. 

“So I wake up and she's in my hospital room and she’s just… god, I don’t even know. Just so attentive and wants to listen to me, and be there with me. How could I not want to forgive her? I put her through hell, and I know, she’s no angel, but even after all the shit I said to her, she still came. I know I hurt her, but I know she still loves me too.” you finish.

“She does Jake. But what her and Sam did is a far worse offense than what you and Elle did.” he says.

“I know. I know that, but…I feel just as guilty. I was planning to do the same thing. I just…how can I stay mad at her when she all but gave me free reign. The only difference is that I didn’t give her permission.” you say. 

“Would you have given it?” he asks.

“No? I don’t know? Maybe? That whole night is a fucking blur, I barely, barely remember it. It was like a movie, man. Wild shit and bad decisions happening everywhere. Way too much alcohol. We were having fun, we all felt really free, I guess. One of those once in a lifetime nights, ya know? Do you know that I came and slept in your room that night?” you ask.

“What? No.” he replies.

“Yeah, after I told her we were done, I left the room. I didn’t know where to go, so I slept on the couch in your room. Left before you got up. Tried to talk to her again, went pretty fucking poorly, so I went to the bar and drank myself stupid.” you confess.

“I just feel like…I got really lucky that she was in the room with me the other night. I don’t know what would have happened if she wasn’t. I got a second chance, you know? So why shouldn’t I give her one, too?” you finish.

“That’s your call brother. I know she loves you. I know you love her. But sometimes things aren’t that cut and dry. I know you’ll make the right call though. You always do. I’m glad you are feeling better and I’m glad you told me about everything. You know I will help you any way I can.” he says, standing up from the table. 

“I realized while I was in the hospital that I don’t tell you guys that I love you, nearly enough. You know I’m not an emotional kind of guy, but… I do, love you.”

A smile crosses his face at your confession, “I love you too Jakey. And for the record you might be the most emotional guy I know.”

You smile and pat his back as you walk away up the stairs, trying to keep your heart rate down and avoid a coughing fit. You twist the door knob, and as you step inside you see Y/N squatting down in front of her suitcase looking for her pajamas, her towel twisted on top of her head. 

You’d missed seeing her like this. Sure you’ve been with her nearly every night in the hotel room, but something about being here was different. You pulled your shirt over your head and tied your hair up at the base of your neck, letting your sweats fall to the floor before sliding into your bed with a groan. Your body was sore from all the coughing you’d done the past few days, and your muscles were extremely tight as a result. 

Y/N flipped the towel off of her head, dragging her brush through it, and tossing it back into her suitcase. She had on her normal pajamas of an oversized t-shirt and panties, though she’d been opting for shorts as well more recently. You were interested to see what she would choose tonight. 

She looked over her shoulder as you watched her make the decision, and as she shut her suitcase you couldn’t help the smile on your face. She turned off the overhead light, leaving the room lit by the TV, as she crawled over you into the bed. 

“You gonna turn it on?” she asks, positioning herself under the blankets.

“What?” you ask.

“Our show?” she answers, so normally. 

“Do you want me to?” you ask.

“Well yeah. Don’t you want to know what's going to happen to the cigarette smoking man?” she asks.

You turn to her and pull her into your side, letting her cuddle up to you in her favorite spot as you hit play on the remote.

About halfway through the episode you feel your eyes starting to get heavy, thanks to that damn medicine. You have been lazily running your fingers through her still damp hair, and halfway paying attention to the show on the screen as you just enjoy the feeling of her draped over your body.

Your phone buzzes on the nightstand causing both of you to turn your heads. You reach over and grab it, pulling it out in front of you to see who it is. You and Y/N both squint at the brightness of your screen as you quickly turn it down. 

You click on the notification letting it open your Instagram DM’s and seeing Carson's name appear at the top.

Carson:You changed my strings? You didn’t have to do that! You’re a sweetheart. 💕

Your heart starts to race as you quickly lock your screen and place the phone back on your nightstand, hoping she didn’t see. 

“So that’s why you needed strings…” she says, laying her head back down on your chest.

“Just trying to be nice. She practically saved my life you know…” you say, hoping to play it off.

A few minutes pass and it's silent between the two of you. You swallow nervously as you grab the remote and pause the show, before turning off the TV. She turns to look at you, resting her chin on your chest.

You turn onto your side, letting her fall beneath you, as you cup her face in your hand.

“For three days that woman had to listen to me ask for you. Beg, really. Were we good friends in highschool, yeah, sure. But I haven’t talked to her since graduation. She did something nice for me, so I did something nice for her. If anyone knows how I feel about you, it’s her.” you say.

“How do you feel?” she asks.

“I’ll tell you the same thing I told Josh. When I was scared to death, thought I was about to die, your face was all I could see.” you reply.

“Really?” she breathes.

You lay your face onto hers, letting her lips lay against your cheek, as you force yourself not to show her exactly how you feel. “Yeah, baby.” you whisper.

“You wanna go to sleep?” you ask.

“Will you hold me?” she asks, the tone in her voice nervous that you might say no.

You roll her to her side and pull her into your chest, letting your head settle into your pillow as you twist your fingers with hers. It feels so, so good to be with her like this. Your missing piece. 

You breathe in deeply and let it go, finally feeling the weight lift from your chest as you let your eyes close. Suddenly you feel her turning in your arms, her face centimeters from hers.

“Hey Jake?” she whispers. 

You open your eyes and see her looking back at you, “Yeah?”

“It’d be you, too.” she says.

You send her a puzzled look. 

“If I was dying. It would be you, for me. It always has been.” she breathes.

You grab her face with your right hand, cupping her cheek as you press your lips to hers in the kiss that has been dancing between the two of you all day. Her lips are soft and full, and warm, and everything you thought about for the past two weeks without her. Her hand snakes up your bare chest, resting on your neck as she kisses you back; her lips like velvet as they move against your own. 

After a minute you force yourself to pull away from her, just looking into her eyes for a few seconds, before you pull her body back into yours and lay down on your pillow. Though this time you are holding her closer, and holding her tighter, knowing you can’t let her go again. Not ever.

“Goodnight, love.” you whisper softly into her ear.

She rolls her neck to the side, letting you place one soft barely there kiss to her skin as she whispers back to you in her perfectly sleepy voice, “Goodnight, babe.”

HER POV

Evening was drawing near again; you’d spent almost the entire day at your parents’, soaking in the hours you had with them and explaining everything that had been happening the past few days. They were devastated to hear about Jake’s health and the cancellation of the next shows, but they agreed it was in his best interest. 

After dinner and more sweet goodbyes, you told them you were off to play nurse again, and you’d call them when you got back to Nashville. 

You crept back into Jake’s house, the smell of leftover dinner aroma filling your nose. It seemed though mostly everyone had gone to bed, until you heard laughing outside on the back porch. 

You waltzed to the sliding door, peeking through the blinds and found Jake and Josh sitting and talking, bundled up with jackets and scarves. 

You slowly opened the sliding door, and poked your head out. “What are you two doing? It’s freezing out here!”

“No it’s not, Y/N, you’ve just gotten accustomed to the warmth of Tennessee.” Josh laughed. Normally you would find them out here having a beer or sharing a joint, but both of those things weren’t allowed in the house for quite a bit yet. 

“Yeah. Both our doctors told us fresh air would do us some good, so here we are…” Jake said. “I’ll be in in a minute, though.”

“Take your time, get all the fresh air you can! I need you both well.” You closed the door quickly behind you, stopping the brisk air from entering the house. You wondered if Jake had told Josh about anything, and you wondered how he was going to react when he finally did. You weren’t looking forward to that. 

You’d been cuddled up in Jake’s bed reading a book when you heard his door squeak open. You turned sleepily to find him pulling off his scarf, hat, coat, and all the layers he had bundled up in. 

“Hey, whatcha been doing today?” You asked. 

When he was down to his boxers, he climbed in bed beside you, pushing his chilled body against yours. “Missing the hell out of you, that’s what I’ve been doing.”

“God, Jake! You’re so cold, quit!” You laughed and pulled away as he placed his cold hands on your stomach. 

“But I need you to warm me up!” He complained as he grabbed you again, pulling you closer. His freezing cold face was buried in your neck, his hot breath a contrast to the frozen nose pressed into your ear. You felt your whole body tingle, feeling him this close again. Mmm, slow down Jake. But also please don’t…

You let your body roll over against his, sucking up the fact that he was almost frozen solid and giving you chill bumps. “Ahh, that’s better…” he said as he shivered into you, letting out a low growl as he thawed out. Your lips traveled on their own, slipping down the curve of his cold neck, laying tiny kisses as you trailed down to his shoulder, your body begging you to keep taking it further. 

But you couldn’t. You had to go slow, keep your feelings at bay. You weren’t together…but then you saw his deep brown eyes flick up to yours, his eyelids heavy already. His hand grabbed the back of your neck softly, pulling you to meet face to face. Your lips fought to reach out to his, connecting again like they had last night. 

“We shouldn’t be doing this…” he whispered. 

“No, we shouldn’t.” You answered, as he pulled your neck again, letting you stop just millimeters from his lips. You let your tongue sneak out, brushing it into his mouth before pressing your lips to his in a flurry of hitched breaths and grabbing hands. His kiss was hurried and hot, pulling you over on top of him. His hands buried in your hair, and yours cupping his head. It was fast and frantic, like you’d been starved for one another for years upon years. Finally, so perfect. Your Jake…

…but wait. Suddenly you pulled away, disconnecting the two of you as you wiped your lips off with your hand. You shook your head quickly from side to side. “This isn’t right Jake. We can’t…” you laid back down beside him. 

“Fuck you’re right. You’re right you’re right. We can’t. I’m sorry, I just–”

You leaned in and kissed him again, the pull to him overtaking your entire mind, body and soul. He kissed you back, this time slow and sweet, the kind that set your insides on fire. You couldn’t help the whimper that escaped your lips at the overwhelming feeling of passionate want for him swimming through your body. 

“Mmm, gotta stop making those noises baby, driving me crazy already…” he whispered between deep, engulfing kisses. “We can’t be doing these things…breaking our own rules…”

You rolled him so you were on your back, him hovering over you. His hand instinctively reached down and pulled your leg over his, hitching it and burying his hand in your hip. 

“Truly not the best idea…we should really stop while we’re ahead…” you breathed into him, tongues searching into each other’s mouths again. “But we never came up with any rules though, did we?” You stated more than asked. 

“Mm, nope. We should have laid some down.” He said, gritting his teeth together, flexing his jaw and moving his eyes from your lips down to your breasts. “What’s rule number one, baby? Tell me what we can’t do…” he said, kissing you hard again. 

Your mind was swirling, fighting between wanting to say fuck it and sleep with him, and deciding that you needed to stop. Truly stop. And show yourselves that you could do it. It was time to grow up…but god…his hands on you…

“Rule number one is no kissing.” You said as he brushed his hand down your neck, pulling your tit into his hand and squeezing it, the touch alone making you want to moan obscenities. He pulled his mouth away from yours. 

“Okay, no kissing. Got it.” He breathed, chest heaving. 

“Rule number two, no touching, like that…” he firmly gripped your tit again, pulling and twisting your nipple just the way you fuckin liked. 

“Okay, no touching like that. And three?” He asked, body buzzing. 

“Rule three is… I still get to tell you I love you every single day, how much I care for you, and how sorry I am that I hurt you so badly. How much I want to make this work. And how much I want you to be the person I wake up next to every single morning for the rest of my life.” You spit the words out before you could think about them, and they took him by a little bit of surprise. 

He sat back, admiring you. A small smile crept to his lips as he brought his lips to your forehead, kissing it hard. He nodded. “Okay. Okay baby.”

You let yourselves calm down, settling into a state of relaxation again after getting so worked up. 

“So, you never said no sex, though. So we can still do that, right? Just no kissing or touching?” He said after a few minutes. You rolled up and smacked him across the chest. 

“Jacob!” You laughed. 

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding! Lay back down. Go to sleep.”

“Gonna be hard to go to sleep after feeling you like that again…” you said, laughing. 

“No shit, I already wanna break those rules so fuckin’ bad.” He laughed too, both of you realizing how much you turned each other on. 

“Jake, I wanna tell you something.” You sat up on your elbows. “We both know we’ve got to give each other time, right? We owe it to each other.” He nodded.

“I talked to Logan, and he and a couple friends have a big house, and they’re looking for one more roommate. I told him that I’d take the room. I think it would be best for us, right now. So we can truly have our space away from each other.” You went on. You watched his face fall. “Things feel okay right now, but let’s be honest Jake, I hurt the hell out of you. And I still harbor that guilt. I’ve got to have my time, and I have to give you yours.”

He sighed deeply. You could tell by the look on his face that he didn’t like the idea, but he understood where you were coming from. You thought back to how horribly he talked to you just a week ago, how awful things were…you didn’t want to end up there again. 

“Can we talk more about it tomorrow?” He asked. You could tell his meds were kicking into overdrive. 

“Yeah, babe. Tomorrow.”

You both ended up cuddling again, each of you falling asleep with the love of your life. And you promised yourself right there that you’d spend everyday proving it to him. 

——

The next morning you woke up early to head back home, Jake finally having more strength than he had all week. It was good seeing color in his face again and you knew he was anxious to get back to Tennessee. 

You made your home in the backseat while Josh hopped into the drivers seat, and Jake manned the copilot seat. You’d made yourself a little bed in the back, ready to curl up with your book. 

You’d been on the road maybe an hour or so when you got a text from Jake. 

Jake

9:12am: Please don’t move out

You

9:13am: Jake, you know we need our space right now

Jake

9:15am: Yes, we do. So I’ll just go to the guest room. You can have our bedroom again. Just… please stay. Don’t go away.

You looked out the window at the passing trees, knowing in your heart that you truly didn’t want to move out. But could you make it work? Moving away from him seemed like a good idea, but also, what if it wasn’t? What if it drove you even further apart? What if so much time passed, that you never ended up coming back? 

You

9:20am: Okay. One condition. 

Jake

9:21am: Tell me

You

9:22am: The guest room is mine.  

——

A while later, you’d made it to somewhere deep in Kentucky when you felt your stomach rumble. 

“Do you guys wanna stop for food soon? I’m starving.” You said, closing your book. 

“Hell yes I’m starving too.” Josh said, bringing up his GPS. “Jake, you’ve had nothing but jell-o and hard boiled eggs for 4 days, you pick where we go.” 

“Do you guys really wanna know what I want?” Jake went on. “You can’t say no…”

Josh nodded. “Yeah okay I guess…”

“I want fuckin’ Dairy Queen. Chicken strips, and honey mustard, and french fries, and a giant turtle blizzard.” He said, making weird mouth sounds as he talked. “My mouth is literally watering right now. All I could think about in that damn hospital bed was fucking up a blizzard bigger than my face.”

You and Josh erupted with laughter. “Of all the places in the world, and you want Dairy Queen?” He laughed at his twin. 

“What do you have against the Queen of Dairy, Josh?” Jake said blankly, his British accent coming back full force. “Shit’s delicious and that’s where I want to go, got it, damn it?”

You were laughing hard now. “I love Dairy Queen. Sounds good to me babe.” 

Josh raised his eyebrows. “Oooookay then, find the closest one.”

——

Jake was still eating his ice cream on the walk back to the car, a giant smile planted across his face as his red spoon hung from his lips. 

“I’m gonna sit in the back with you. I’m getting tired.” He said, going around to the back door of the car. 

“Meds kicking in already?” You asked. 

“Yep. Big time. Plus I know if I lay down in your lap you’ll play with my hair.” He said, raising his eyebrows in question. 

“I don’t remember making that deal, now.” You answered, knowing that yes, you would play with his hair if he laid in your lap. 

Josh started the car up again and rerouted the GPS. “Josh, I didn’t even see if you needed a break, want me to drive any?” You asked. 

“No no, you coddle him. I’m good to go. Had me my strawberry sundae so I’m ready for the next 200 miles, baby.” He said, placing his sunglasses over his eyes and pulling out of the lot. 

Jake finished his oversized blizzard and put the cup in the door, curling his legs up underneath him as he laid his head onto your lap. He then fished around behind him for your hand that was once again holding your book, grabbed it, and threw it on his own head. “Pleeease?” He whined. 

You giggled, knowing he wanted you to play with his hair. So you obliged, holding your book in your left hand and pulling through his long silky strands with your right. 

You didn’t even notice him on his phone at first, but your eyes inadvertently popped down to his screen below your book. You saw the name Carson, and immediately your stomach fell. They’re still talking? What could they be messaging about? But you couldn’t say a word. It wasn’t your place. 

“Ya know Jake, with your peach fuzz mustache growing in and your hair getting longer by the day, you might actually turn into a pirate by the time we get back home.” You laughed. 

“Mmm, you’d like that wouldn’t you?” He said flirtatiously look up at you. 

“Uggghhhhhh…gross.” Josh said from the front. “Don’t make me turn the music up louder cause I will.”

“I’m thinking about cutting it. I miss how bouncy it was. Now it just sticks to my face when I sweat. I hate pulling it off my neck during shows.” Jake went on, his voice getting sleepier. 

“But that’s what they love, Jake. Haven’t you seen all those crazy people on your TikTac or whatever that things called? Wanting to collect your sweat in fucking vials and shit?” Josh yelled. 

“Oh my God, Josh!” You laughed hard. 

“What? I can’t help it that I’m a super fuckin’ sexbeast on stage! It’s not my fault…” Jake laughed, obviously feeling himself from the medication and overload of sugar.

“My god, you two are insane. And don’t call yourself a ‘sexbeast’ ever again.” You mumbled, going back to your book. You rode on for a little bit, feeling a bit drowsy yourself. Your eyes kept flitting open and closed while the words began to jumble. 

Suddenly you saw a finger flick down onto your page. “Ya like it so far?” Jake asked through a yawn. 

You smiled. “Yeah, I’m really into it. I hope you don’t mind I borrowed it…” you said, realizing you never asked. 

“What’s mine is yours, babe. And that is one of my favorites.” He said, tucking his hand between your thighs, and curling up on your lap again, letting himself drift off into a much needed slumber. You traced the plains and curves of his face with your fingers, letting them drag over his eyebrows and down the slope of his nose. Even in his sleep he would whine at the pleasant feeling, leaning into your touch. You loved him. More now than ever before. The thought of losing him, showing you everything you already knew, in a whole new light.

An hour or so passed and you somehow manage to stay awake, the upbeat lull of Josh’s quirky playlists keeping your mind piqued. 

“Almost home, you wanna drop Jake off at the house then take me to the office to get my car?” Josh asked, turning the music down. 

“Yeah, that sounds good to me.” You said, placing a dog ear on your page and setting the book on the floorboard. 

A bit later you pulled onto your street, the sun beginning to dip low in the sky. You jostled Jake awake as best you could. “Hey Jake, we’re home. You wanna go ahead inside? I’m gonna take Josh back to his car.”

He stretched, rubbed his eyes, and nodded. “Yeah, I’ll get the bags and stuff out.” You all slinked out of the car, stretching your legs after the long ride. 

“Ahh, feels good to be back in the non frigid temperature, eh guys?” Josh said, helping to pull your suitcases from the back of the car. “I’ll get it brother. You don’t need to get winded.” He handed him a small bag, and wheeled his larger one up to the door. 

“I’ll be back in just a bit.” You told Jake as you placed your suitcase inside the front door. 

You switched Josh out to take the driver’s seat, adjusting the chair and mirrors a bit to fit your liking. This was going to be your first time alone with Josh, and you wondered if Jake had mentioned anything. 

You’d been on the road just a few minutes before he spoke up. 

“You know, you guys don’t have to keep the charade up when you’re around me, right?” He asked, breaking the ice. 

Fuck. Of course Jake told him. 

“Ah, Jake had a little conversation with you, didn’t he?” You said, flipping the blinker to turn into traffic. 

“He did. I’m still not very happy with you, Y/N. I hope you know. Sam either.” He said blankly. Ouch. Would you ever stop hurting Josh, too? 

“I know you’re not, Josh. I wouldn’t be happy with us either. Hell, I’m still so mad at myself I can hardly see straight.” You were both quiet for a bit before you decided to keep going. 

“I know there’s nothing I can say to fix it, except that I hope you know that Jake and I have talked through everything, for the most part. He knows and I know that I made a huge mistake. I can’t go back and change anything, so I’m just going to take my mistake and grow from it. I’m really ready to grow up now, Josh. I have to. I have to be the person he needs, and the person that I need. I’m going to start working on myself, fixing my faults and moving toward better days.” You were quiet again. 

“I hope you know how much I love him.” You mumbled, wishing that Josh would say something. Anything. 

“I do. And I know how much he loves you. Even though I can’t believe the shit that went down, with Sam and everything, I know that you guys will figure it out. You have to.” 

You nodded. “Thanks, Josh. Remember you can stay mad at me for as long as you need. But I’m still going to keep being here for him. And for you guys.” 

“I know you are. You’re family, remember?” He muttered. 

You glanced at Josh, a tiny smile on his lips. 

“Yeah, family.” You smiled, holding your hand out to hold his. He grasped it back, squeezing it tightly, and placed a tiny kiss to your knuckles. 

“I have a question, though. Well, a condition, maybe. An option?” Josh said. 

“Ha ha, yes?” 

“Start coming to yoga with me. Take some classes. You said you wanted to work on yourself, what better place to start than right here?” He said, reaching his hand over and touching the spot right below your breastbone. 

“No, Josh, I can’t! I’ve never done yoga…” you went on, surprised at his proposition as you put the car in park in the lot. 

“So? That doesn’t matter. Yoga is an actual journey, and I’m telling you right now, it’ll help you get in touch with yourself quicker than any self-help podcast or whatever. Come with me. I’ll even go back to beginner classes with you.” He said. 

You considered it, biting your cheek into your mouth. “You really think it would help me?”

“I know it will help you. I promise. And, it feels good. Every single time you leave, you’ll wonder why you didn’t start sooner. And you’ll get to hang out with me, and what’s better than that?” He joked. 

You giggled, punching him on the shoulder. “Okay, I guess I could try it out. Yeah, let’s do it.” 

“Perfect! It’s settled then!” He leaned over to kiss your cheek. “I’m still very disappointed in you, but I’m also excited. When we go back on the road, I have some great classes on YouTube I use.”

He climbed out of the car, letting the cool rush of air cut through the blowing heat from the vents. “See you later!”

Hmm, you, a yogi?

JAKE POV

Walking back into your home after the past few weeks felt eerie. The walls felt warm and welcoming, but the darkness is what got you. After lying in a hospital for days, all you really wanted was to be back in your home, with Y/N, a fire going, music playing, and life happening all around you. 

You walked yours and Y/N’s suitcases to your bedroom, switching on all the lights as you did so. You lifted the suitcases, placing them on the bed so you could unpack a little later. A cough rattled through your chest, sending tiny shooting pains into your lungs, but not nearly as bad as it hurt a few days ago. 

You could still feel the lethargy, the exhaustion, and the body aches hanging in your body, and you knew they were right. You needed rest. No way you could go back out on the road right now. 

You walked around the house, ready to pick up the little messes you’d left behind before you left. But there were none. In fact, the place was so clean you could eat off the floor. The floor…had the wood been shined? You walked to the bathroom. Spotless. Shower scrubbed, laundry done, bedsheets changed with folded extras in the closets…what the hell? It almost felt sterile…

You decided you’d talk to Y/N about that when she got home. In the meantime, your fingers were itching to play something, so you decided to go into the study and turn on the fireplace, drifting away playing that new tune you had written in the hospital until Y/N got back. 

You walked into the study, finding that your acoustic wasn’t in its normal place. Oh, you’d taken it upstairs to hide away forever in the closet. Back when things were bad. Back when the guitar held horrible memories. 

You ran up the stairs and pulled it from the closet, also in a different place than you’d left it. 

Fuck. 

You made your way back downstairs, completely winded, and sat down in your leather chair to check the tuning. It felt so perfect in your hands, your old faithful. Always there when you needed it. You glanced to the desk, as something out of place caught your eye. Small and red…

Wait. Your notebook. The one you’d given to Y/N for Christmas. Sitting right here on your desk. And…a flower laid perfectly on top? Dried and wilted and brown, with only one petal. 

——

You aren't sure how long you'd been sitting there staring at the notebook, it had to be at least an hour. Flipping through the pages reminiscing on all the memories it held. Finding it on the desk felt like someone had ripped your heart out of your chest. Why would she leave this? Did she not want it anymore?

You sat back in your chair twirling the flower stem in your hand. One last petal. One last she loves me. Or maybe she loves me not and that's why she left it? 

You hear the front door open slowly, and seconds later she’s stepping into the house. You continue to sit there, twirling the brown stem in your fingers, just waiting for her to find you.

“Jake, what are you doing babe, you need to get in bed.” she says, tossing her things on the table by the door.

She steps into the study, and as she gets closer she spots the notebook on your lap at the flower in your hand. Her face goes white as she makes the realization.

 “You don’t want it anymore?” you ask.

“No…Jake…” she says, fighting off tears.

“You left it…were you not… were you not going to come back?” you ask, your voice shaking.

“When I left here, we weren’t even speaking Jake, I– I didn’t think you wanted me back here. I thought we were done, over, all of it. I couldn’t take it. I could hardly look at it. Just reminded me how badly I betrayed you. What I did to us.” she admits.

“The flower. You left one petal…” you question.

“I just…wanted to tell you I loved you one last time.” she replies quietly.

You run your hand over your face. It’s time. You have to tell her.

You stand up from the chair, and reach your hand out to her, letting her clasp her hand with yours as you lead the two of you to your bedroom.

You lead her to the end of the bed, and she sits as you kick off your shoes and flannel. You join her on the edge of the bed, taking a deep breath. “I need to talk to you. I need to tell you something. I’ve needed to tell you for a few days, but… I just couldn’t find the right time.” you say.

Her face drops, and you wonder what she's thinking. 

“You know that whole night… it’s kind of a blur to me. I really don’t remember much of it. I think I was just so mad initially about you and Sam, that I kind of blocked out everything else. My brain was only focusing on that hurt.” you start.

She nods her head as you continue, grabbing her hands in yours, “I don’t remember much of what happened in that hotel room with them. Part of me tried to just forget the whole thing ever happened, but a few days ago, Elle texted me.” 

Her eyes widened at her name, “Yeah?”

“Yeah. She, apologized for kind of pushing the limits, so to speak. At first I had no idea what she was talking about, so I told her that. And well, she told me what happened.” you say, pulling your phone from your pocket. You scroll to your messages with Elle and hand the phone to her, to let her read for herself.

You watch as she reads the messages, her brow furrowing and relaxing a few times over before she reaches the end. She looks over at you, a confused look on her face. 

“You don’t remember any of that?” she asks.

“No, well, I didn’t but, now I kind of do. Bits and pieces.” you confess. “I’m so sorry. I…I wouldn’t have been such a dick if I had known that… I don’t know… that I was probably going to do it too. How could I be mad at you if I was going to do the same thing? I– I don’t know what to say other than I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“Jake… It’s not the same. I went behind your back. There was no conversation between us where you said it was okay for me to do that... I cheated on you. It’s different because I knew you two were probably going to hook up and I was okay with it. Do you not remember our conversation about it, either?” she asks.

“Not much…” you breathe.

“Jake, I told you right as you got that phone call from Josh. I told you it was okay. I told you I knew things with you and her were looking like they were heading that way. I gave you a free pass, I told you I trusted you both. I’m not mad baby, I gave you permission.” she says, rubbing her hand up your arm. “I thought you knew that…”

“Did I…tell you, you could…?” you ask, hoping she knows what you’re asking.

“No. We never finished the conversation. Your phone rang, and then you left. Part of me thought maybe, you kind of had? We never spoke the words, but we both sort of acted like we were going to…ya know. Switch, I guess. But I don’t know, the second it happened I knew what I was doing was so wrong. The biggest mistake I’ve ever made. I shouldn’t have stayed. I should have left with you. I know that now. But I had to learn the hard way.”

“Y/N…” you say, running your hand over her shoulder. 

“Why aren’t you mad baby? The guilt has been eating me alive for days…I feel like you should be mad at me.” you say.

“Because Jake, I knew that you two were probably going to. I came to terms with it the second the two of you started making out. It hurt a little, but I knew it was just a one time thing. I knew you loved me, and you were coming home to me. You promised me that. What did I have to worry about?” she pauses. “But… the weed, the alcohol… it got to me. I took things past where they should have gone. And I ruined it. I ruined everything we built.”

“You had every right to do what you did that night Jake. I don’t expect you to ever forgive me, but…I hope that maybe one day…” she trails off. 

You twist your fingers with hers as you bite your lips together. “One day.”

“That’s why I feel like we need space from each other. So that you can process and have time to figure out what you want. So maybe you can forgive me. It’s easy for us to fall back into our same pattern if I am here everyday, and around to tempt you. If I’m gone, maybe you’ll realize that this isn’t what you actually want, or maybe we will both realize it is. I don’t know, do you know what I’m trying to say?” she says. “None of this makes sense, it’s like there’s not a correct road to take.”

“Y/N…I completely understand. But, can I ask you a question?” you ask.

“Yeah…” she breathes.

“Do you love me?” you ask.

“Yes, I do.” she replies.

You nod, “Do you want to spend the rest of your life with me?” you ask nervously.

“Every single second.” she replies.

“So why would you walk away from that?” you ask.

“I…I just want to give you space to figure out if that's what you want, Jake…”

“Baby, I have known that since the night you picked those glass shards out of my hands. There’s nothing left to figure out.” you reply.

“So please. Don’t go because you think it’s what I want, or what I need. What I need is you. Always you. I know I need time to forgive you, but that’s something I am willing to work on together. I want you to have your space though, so I am fine with you staying in the guest room, as long as you want. We can follow all your rules, and shit, I don’t even care if you add ten more. I’ll follow them. All of them. I just… I know what I want, and it’s you and it will always be you.” you finish.

She wraps her arms around your neck and pulls you into her. You wrap your arms around her and pull her down to lay back onto the bed. You hold each other there for a few minutes, just feeling each other closely as your bodies melt into one. 

It’s quiet, just the sounds of your breathing filling the air in the dim room. Your room. The room you hoped to share with her again one day. You would. You just knew. 

Her phone alarm began to echo through the house, bouncing off of the walls and into your ears as she pulled away from you. You held her hand as she pulled away walking towards the door to grab her phone. The alarm stopped and you heard her make her way into the kitchen before returning back to the bedroom with a glass of water. 

She came back to the bed, standing between your parted legs, “How about you take a shower, and get in bed, while I find something for you to eat before you take these pills.”

“Is it time already?” you ask.

She grabs your hand and pulls you up from the bed, shooing you off to the shower, as she disappears through the door. 

You had to admit the shower felt good. As much as you hated postponing the first leg of tour, there was nothing quite like being home. You ran your towel through your hair and pulled on a pair of boxers before making your way back to the bed, and pulling back the duvet. Sliding into your own bed felt like heaven. You opened your side table to grab the TV remote and stopped when you saw her photo.

Fuck.

You had forgotten you took it out of your wallet. You pulled it out, tattered around the edges and looked at it. You looked into the drawer again, finding the pick, right where you left it. Thank god. How could you have ever been that mad?

You quickly got up, finding your jeans on the floor, and fishing out your wallet. You hastily put the items back where they belonged, and jumped back into bed before she came back. 

You grabbed the remote and turned on the TV, seeing it still paused on the documentary you started a few weeks ago, but at the end, not the beginning where you left it. Did she finish it?

Seconds later Y/N walked back into the room, carrying a plate.

“Best we had. We need to go to the store.” she laughed. 

“We can go. Do you want to go tomorrow?” you offered.

“I will go. You need to stay in bed and rest.” she says.

“But I want to go do something…I’ve been in bed for days…” you whine.

“Okay, maybe.” she concedes.

“Make sure you take those after you eat, okay? Almost done with them. Two more days I think.” she says, pointing to the pills on the nightstand. 

“I will.”

“Okay…I’ll see–” she says, slowly walking to the door. 

“Wait! Are we…not gonna see what Scully’s solution is?” you ask, hoping she would come back.

“Jake…” she groans, leaning into the door frame.

You nod towards the TV, bringing up the episode you stopped on. 

“Let me change, and then we can watch one episode. But I’m staying on the other side of the bed, then I am going to the guest room when it’s over.” she says.

“Yes Ma’am.” 

—

A few minutes later she is walking back into your room in a blue silky pajama set, your mouth positively watering as she releases her hair from her bun as she walks to the other side of the bed. 

She pulls back the duvet and slides into the bed, sighing as her head hits the pillow, “God, I forgot how comfy this bed is…”

“Mmhm….” you smirk, biting your lips together as you look at her. 

She turns to look at you, you still examining every inch of her body that she was willing to show you.

“What?” she scoffs.

You smile and shake your head, “Nothing. You’re just…gorgeous.”

“Jake…” she warns.

“I’m not breaking any rules.” you quip.

“Just hit play.” she says, turning back to the TV.

You finished your food and took the pills like she said, and within minutes you start to feel drowsy. You turn off the lamp that was lighting the room, and roll toward the center of the bed to keep watching. 

When the episode ends and she doesn't make a sound, you turn to look at her, only to realize she's been asleep the whole time. You just look at her for a minute, taking in the subtle part of her lips and the way her chest is rising in falling in her deeply content sleep. How could you possibly dream of waking her up?

You pull the duvet up over her shoulders and brush the hair from her face before quietly rolling out of the bed and bringing your dishes to the kitchen. As you place the items in the sink you spot her phone on the counter, and decide to bring it to the bedroom for her. You grab the phone charger she keeps in her purse and quietly plug in her phone and place it on the nightstand next to her head. 

You return back to the bed, and let out a sigh, ready to finally sleep in your own bed. As your eyes close you feel her body move closer to yours, cuddling into your side before going still once again. You wrap your arm around her, and gently kiss her forehead, closing your eyes and finally feeling like things might turn out okay after all. Just you and her, right where you should be.

—

Your eyes open slowly, adjusting to the light of the room as you blink away the sleep. You let out a huge yawn, noting that your deep breath isn’t nearly as painful as it has been. You reach your arm to the other side of the bed to feel for her, but all you’re met with is cold sheets.

You sit up on your elbows looking around to see her phone gone and her side of the bed made. What the hell?

You roll over to your side to grab your phone but see a folded note sitting on top of it. You grab it and rub your eyes before opening it and reading it.

Jake,

Went to meet Logan for breakfast. 

Will be back soon and we can go to the store. 

Next dose of medicine is at 9:45, don’t forget.

xo

You fold the note and set it on your night stand, laying back into your pillow. Logan?

You roll out of bed and into the kitchen, seeing the coffee pot still on and half full, your favorite mug waiting by the machine. You smile to yourself, knowing she took extra time to do that for you. You pour some coffee into the mug and make your way back to the bedroom, rummaging around for a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt, finding everything you’re looking for simply because she did all your laundry. While you were a total asshole to her. While you left her here alone. While she thought you hated her.

God, I fucked up.

You pull the clothes on and make your way to the front porch, settling yourself in the wooden rocking chair as you enjoy the sun on your skin. You scroll aimlessly on your phone for a while, wondering what time she left this morning, and how long you slept after. 

After draining your mug you returned back inside, deciding that if you were going to be banished to your house for a few weeks you would at least be productive. You made your way over to your record cabinet and pulled the entire stack. You made piles by letter and began organizing each one into the appropriate pile, by artist name. 

You must have lost track of time, because the next thing you knew your phone was ringing alerting you that it was time to take your pills. You pulled yourself up from the floor and made your way into the kitchen, grabbing the medicine and a glass of water and following the rules laid out for you. 

You returned back to your study and finished putting the last of the albums into the cabinet, very satisfied that you’d completed a project you’d been wanting to do for a long time. 

You drug yourself into the bedroom to start unpacking your suitcase, taking out the clean items and putting them away until it was time to pack again. As you reached the bottom the tiny white bag laid there just staring at you. Shit. You had almost forgotten about it. Where should you put it?

You grabbed the bag, sitting on the bed and dumping it out into your hand. You held the tiny piece of circular gold metal between your fingers letting the small diamond glint in the light. You imagined what it would look like on her finger, tying her to you forever. You wanted it. You wanted it more than anything. You wondered if you would ever get back to that point with her. You hoped and prayed you would, but for now you needed to hide this away. Somewhere she would never ever find it. 

You stood up and walked into the hallway, spotting your guitar case leaning against the wall. Perfect. You bent down and unlatched the locks, opening it up to see your guitar sitting perfectly nestled in the red velvet confines. You opened the tiny pick slot, and slid the white bag inside, shutting the small slot, and reclosing the case. Safe and sound. You knew the crew guarded this case with their lives. No one was getting their hands on it other than you. You walked the case upstairs to the music room, putting it there with the others, just waiting for their time to play.

You made your way back downstairs, positioning yourself on the couch for a while flipping through TV channels as your stomach rumbled. Shit, you hadn’t eaten yet today.

You drug yourself to the kitchen and began pilfering through the pantry, looking for anything you could eat before you went to the store today to restock. Finding a lone granola bar you scarfed it down, hoping she would be home soon so you could go. 

You took a quick shower and shaved for the first time in days, hoping Y/N wouldn’t be too sad to see it go. As you dressed yourself in fresh clothes, you heard your phone chime on the dresser. 

Danny

11:14am: *Attachment* (4)

Danny

11:14am: I know it’s probably nothing, but didn’t want you to randomly see these scrolling through socials. They’re eating her alive in the comments…

What?

You opened the attachments seeing screenshots from social media of photos of Y/N and Logan, from what had to be this morning. Comments about her being with someone else, or speculating on her cheating on you. People wondering who that guy is since she wasn’t with you… Photos showing them walking together with his arm over her shoulder, at what seemed to be a farmers market. Photos of them eating this morning. To be fair, it didn’t look good, but after everything last night, surely it wasn’t what it seemed. You had a nauseous feeling in your stomach, but you pushed it away, knowing that she loves you, and only you. She told you. Right?

You

11:18am: Thanks dude. 

You tossed your phone on the bed, pacing the room for a second as you tried to let the negative thoughts leave your head. In a split second decision you decided to call Josh, grabbing your phone again and hitting call. 

The line rang out until you were met with his voicemail, groaning and throwing it onto the bed once again. You carried yourself to your study, turning on the TV again and starting a documentary knowing she would be home any second. 

Your phone buzzed on the couch next to you, picking it up, you saw her name. 

Y/N

11:27am: Hey, Wanda from next door just called me. She was confused why we were home early since she was going to keep our mail for us until the end of April. Anyways we were talking and I told her you got sick and we came home so she wouldn’t need to get the mail anymore – all that to say she is making you ‘get well soon’ muffins. So check the porch in a little bit. Be home soon!

You

11:29am: Thanks baby

When another hour passed and your stomach continued to growl, you snatched your keys off the counter and drove to Publix, buying any and every item that looked even remotely appetizing. As you walked the aisles you dreamed about the sandwich you were going to make when you got home, piling it so high that it might be physically impossible to eat it. 

Your phone buzzed in your pocket as you perused the wine selection, needing to refill your stash with her favorites. You placed them into the cart as you pulled your phone out, seeing her name on the screen once again. You swiped your thumb across the notification, expecting to see that she was on her way home, but instead you were met with the opposite.

Y/N

1:10pm: Running longer than I thought. I’ll be back soon! ❤️

Right.

You shoved your phone back into your pocket and headed towards the checkout. You swiped your card and made your way back to your car, filling the trunk to the brim. As you pulled up to the house to see that she still wasn’t there, you felt your face grow warm. You spotted the muffins on the porch, smiling and telling yourself to walk over and say ‘thank you’ as soon as you could. You carried all the groceries and the muffins inside and put them away, finally able to make yourself that sandwich and of course have a muffin.

The day continued to tick by and Y/N still hadn’t come home. Part of you started to worry if she was okay. Around 2:45 you took your next dose of pills, retiring to your bedroom for a much needed nap. Even the simplest of tasks were exhausting you. You knew the guys made the right call postponing the shows. There’s no way you could have played a show in a few days. 

You scrolled on your phone for a while, eventually falling asleep as the TV played in the background. 

The chime of the security system woke you up, and you sat up instantly knowing she was probably home. You looked at your phone. 4:03pm. Damn.

You stood up from the bed and walked over to the bedroom door, leaning into the frame as you watched her kick off her shoes and coat, arms full of various paper and plastic bags and a bouquet of flowers. 

You crossed your arms and looked at her as she finally saw you standing there, dropping most of the bags and the flowers as she stared back at you.

“How was your breakfast date…” 

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

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[bucketbender]

So, I’ve seen some criticism of the 5th season of Solar opposites. I would like to propose counter arguments in a disciplined and respectful manner. Don’t yell at me.

Spoilers ahead, of course :

"The dynamic is too different, it looks like a fanfic"

Okay. So, this one first. I see where you’re coming from. There’s cute nicknames all the time, they’re always banging, Tervo is a bit too "always there" in the episodes. I get it, it changes a lot.

But it didn’t just completely change because they got married. It completely changed because the Valentines episode broke everything they thought they knew about each other. At first, Terry and Korvo were friends. Then they became such good friends that they would kiss sometimes on the lips. They tongue kiss in season 4 (not before I think), because that’s how much they feel a connection with the other. But they still think that their species doesn’t have love. It’s just really strong teammate affinity, right ? Yeah. It has to be. What else ?

(Not to mention that they’re both morons AND cartoon characters. Give them a break, they’re as sharp as a declawed kittens.)

And when the Valentines episode happens, they finally learn that they can feel love. And that they love each other. Their stupid minds were blown to ash. If they’re in love, they can do everything they wouldn’t dare to do before, everything that seemed kind of taboo. They can get married, kiss tongue anywhere, give each other romantic nicknames, say they love each other as much as they want.

That’s why I think this season was so… intense with Tervo. The next season will probably calm down and focus more on the family, while still keeping the love and cute nicknames between the two.

"Cherry becomes evil out of nowhere"

It might seem weird, but when it happened in front of my screen, I wasn’t really shocked. I just thought "oh… well, there it is."

As Cherry said herself : she never once tried to take the power. All she ever did was trying to help people, survive and protect her daughter. The wall took literally everything from her and spit her out. The only good thing about it is her child (and Montez).

She did nothing but play the hero over and over and was just really happy when she was away from it all with Pezlie. But that’s not the wall/backyard works. It will always be there, this society full of tiny people led by tiny dictators. And it will always be a menace for her and her child.

So if she can’t run, can’t hide, can’t keep playing hero, what else can she do ? Lead. "What you need is a queen". And you know ? In a way, she’s right. This society needs something or someone that will bring order to it. Real order. Everyone will live in the same place, food will be rationed (for the sick people, for winter, etc), and there will be laws. It’s what this place needs so that there will be no more freaking wars and conspiracies to fight or run from.

And yes, she does look pretty evil when she says that, especially when she orders them to bow. Because she snapped, she’s done. She got thrown into a lego hole, betrayed, stabbed, heartbroken, abandoned, left for dead by this society, and the only thing that matters to her from now one is to protect her kid and makes sure she grows up alright.

Then again… the god status she unlocked when the grass grew back just when she took over might make her actually join the dark side. We’ll see.

"Glenn’s story is so uninteresting and I freaking hate Tomblr"

For this one… I can’t really blame you. I was pretty disappointed that Zy and Glenn didn’t reunite. But I have to admit that I kind of liked Tomblr.

Just like every other planet, his home was ruled and ruined by Silvercops. They abused him and his family his whole life. Yet, he still joined them to change them from the inside, make it better, make it good. He believed in this dream so much he joined the ones who ruined his life to help people.

Even though everyone around him probably said "they’re way too dangerous" or "why join them, because you actually like them ?" or "you won’t even make it through the first training". No one believed in him, everyone bullied him but he persevered. So I get why he didn’t want to listen to Glenn when he told him to give up.

Even though we saw him blow up, I just hope he’s not actually dead yet, because that would be disappointing.