#you can tell how much I worry about tagging whoops

[tj-crochets]

I have a quilting question! That being, I’ve never quilted before but I have a gazillion squares of fabric (thrift store whoops, didn’t realize it was cut) and I need a new quilt. If I’m trying to do a basic “I want a warm blanket” quilt, would I just… sew a checkerboard of the squares together, then get batting and idk, a piece of matching size fabric for the back? I have a sewing machine but nothing specifically quilting I don’t think.

Hi! You've got the basics down, that pretty much is the bare bones of quilting and if you want to start with just that you absolutely can. There are some steps that can make the finished product a little less lumpy and/or a little more durable (ironing, basting, stuff like that) but off the top of my head I don't have specific resources to point you toward? Let me see if any of the quilt youtubers I watch have some videos on it okay this quilter doesn't seem to have a "never made any sort of quilt before" tutorial but once you've made one quilt I recommend Just Get It Done Quilts (or if you want to be particularly ambitious about your skills, before your first quilt? I found a lot of technique advice only made sense to me after I'd made my first quilt, but you might learn differently than I do). She has a lot of pattern videos and a lot of technique videos. This seems like a decent very detailed step-by-step guide to making a quilt from start to finish (I just glanced at it), but I will tell you one thing that most of the guides you will read will disagree with: If you are making a simple patchwork for your first quilt (aka a checkerboard of squares) and you aren't super picky about the exact finished size, you do not need to worry about the 1/4" seam allowance. You can ignore all of that and come back to figuring out how to do it later. For simple patchworks, it's just important that your seam allowance is consistent. So, if you're not super familiar with sewing but are using a machine, just line up the edges of the fabric with the edge of the foot on your sewing machine, and whatever that is will be fine (as long as the seam allowance is large enough to not unravel. It'd work for all the sewing machine feet I have, but I have not seen all the options) also tagging in @creations-by-chaosfay, who has been quilting a lot longer than I have. Do you have a good step-by-step starting guide to making your first quilt?

[boygiwrites]

Harley D. Dixon 33

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📖Chapter List.

Author's Note.

TW: CHARACTER DEATH. OFF-SCREEN SUICIDE.

This chapter is heavy with a bittersweet/happy ending. As for the intensity level of the death, think back to the chapter where Shane died. If you want to know more, look at the first tag of this post. Please be wary of this before you read!

Through the wire circle, down at the bottom of the hill, the tiny prisoners are being kicked out.

Curling my fingers tighter around the fence, I squint against the sun, watching as the gate is closed in their faces. They're left to stand there, without direction or purpose, in a sort of purgatory. They can either stay there and eat gravel until they starve, or they can face the outside world. If Dale can hear me, I'm sorry for thinking this, but, good riddance. There certainly ain't no phones out there no more, or even any food, and I know they'll die, but, good riddance. We'on know them. If we let them into our cell block, we'd be downright fools.

You don't put foxes in a chicken coop. It's just common sense, and we don't have much, but we have that.

As our group walk off to continue their chores, content with the death sentence, T-Dog lingers by the gate, digging into his pocket.

Surprisingly, he passes them what looks like a granola bar.

"They're gonna need more than that," Carl muses from beside me. "They need weapons. Ammo. Water."

The two prisoners are less than enthusiastic to receive the snack, but pocket it with a nod anyway. Rick went back into their cell block and packed up their half of the food for 'em, because a deal's a deal, but every crumb counts. A snack can save yer life same way a gun can. 

As they turn into the field beyond the prison, I shrug. "Rick'll prolly let them back into their cell block if they come back."

"You think they will?"

If they don't die out there first, then the answer is obvious. "S'like when ya put'cher dog outside when they's naughty!"

He giggles, "They always wanna come back in."

"Them two fellers ain't no wild dogs," I agree. "They's a pair of chihuahuas."

Before Carl and I can watch the two prisoners for any longer, the door to our cell block opens behind us.

Turning around, a smile makes its way onto my face as Herschel shakily plods down the steps, a crutch wedged underneath each of his armpits. Beth and Lori are dutifully fussing over him, ready to catch him if he falls, but he's managing just fine on his own.

"Whoo-hoo, Herschel!" Carl whoops as we walk over, earning a grin from his Momma. "You ready to race me, yet?"

"Give me another day. I'll take you on," He chuckles breathlessly as he breaches the last step, noticing Mouse. "Hey, boy."

I ask him hopefully, "Will ya race me, too?"

"Oh, no," He exclaims as he rests against the rusty railing, the white sunlight curving over his face. "Now, you're a different story."

"You're being silly," Lori smiles to him.

"I hope so."

"Don't worry, Herschel," I knock my elbow into his. "I'll go easy on ya!"

"How generous. Perhaps Carl and I will just have to verse you as a team?"

"Then it'll just be twice as embarrassing when she beats us both," Carl snickers.

Everybody down in the field can be heard shouting cheers up to us, as Herschel lifts his hand off the crutch to give them a wave.

"Come on," Lori says, eyeing his free hand until he grips the crutch again. "What do you say we go rest at that table over there?"

"Well, I'd say I've got no choice."

"You're right about that," Beth says as we guide him across the courtyard. "Carl, what do you think of his new pants? Stylish, huh?"

The boy glances down, only just noticing the change. "Hell yeah."

"Beth was telling us she tailored them herself," Lori says, sounding impressed.

"Well, I didn't do it alone," The girl smiles as we reach the picnic table, carefully sitting Herschel down. "Harley helped me."

"I just held the string," I say shyly.

"No job too small," Herschel muses to me with a smile, before gazing out at the scenery around us, sighing contentedly.

As grey and bleak as this place may be, with its dead walkers and concrete walls, it's a nice day out, which is always a consolation no matter where we are in the world. The sky hangs bright and blue like a polished dome over our heads, painted with smeared, fluffy clouds. If I really wanted to, I could pretend it's just another summer's day back on the farm, but I'on think I do. I don't need peaches and cows to be happy.

"Good to see you up and at 'em again, Greene," My Dad smirks as he comes through the gate, taking the man's shoulder.

As he squeezes and pulls away, Herschel exclaims, "It's good to be up. I couldn't stand to be in that bed a moment longer."

"I bet. You could come help me clear the fence if ya wanted," He jokes as he walks off. "My students are on break."

"We're just leaving the grunt work to the grunt," Carl calls after him.

"Sure you are," Dad says over his shoulder, before drawing his knife and downing one of the many walkers at the fence.

As he gets back to work, Mouse runs up to us with his tennis ball between his slobbery teeth, dropping it at my feet.

Picking it up, I hold it out to Herschel. "Wanna throw it for 'im?"

"Absolutely," He says, taking it.

He throws the ball across the courtyard, sending Mouse scrambling after it like it's a little animal he's gotta catch. It's nice watching Herschel play fetch with Mouse like this, spending the morning chatting with each other about useless things like the weather and seasonal crops. 

After about ten minutes, when he gives me the ball to throw, it skips like a stone into a pile of trash near the dumpsters. Whoops!

"Ohhh," Carl exclaims dramatically, watching Mouse nose through the junk. "Foul ball."

Giving him a bit of a shove on the shoulder, I laugh, "Shut up, Carl!"

"She never claimed to be a pitcher," Beth giggles. "She's more of a kicker."

"Yeah, I'm a kicker," I agree, with twinkle-toes Carl dodging me as I try landing a kick to his ankle, "Lemme show ya!"

"She's attacking me!"

"I'm a biter, too!"

"Kids will be kids," Herschel chuckles heartily to the girls, shaking his head. After a short pause, I hear him utter, "What—...?"

It takes me and Carl a moment to settle down, pushing at each other and swallowing down our giggles, before we look in the direction of the dumpsters, where everyone has pinned their attention. The laughter dies in my throat just as quickly as it had come alive. Mouse has completely abandoned his search for the ball — My first clue something's wrong —, staring unflinchingly around the corner.

He starts growling lowly, making my Dad turn around just before a rotten foot steps out into the open.

A face peeks out, melted and dripping.

A walker?

Out here?

Then there's a second, and a third, and a suddenly obvious cacophony of groans that could only come from a mob.

As another walker appears on the opposite side of the courtyard, sandwiching us in, Lori gasps.

I exclaim, "What the Hell?"

Where'd they come from?

"Get inside!" My Dad shouts at us, drawing his crossbow, shooting, killing the closest corpse. "Get inside, quick!"

"Come on," Lori grunts as she and Beth haul Herschel onto his crutches. "Come on, we have to go. We have to go!"

The rest of the group are running up the road, screaming our names and fumbling with keys and guns, ripping the gate to the courtyard open, but it's total and sudden chaos, walkers scattered everywhere. Rick rears his axe back, slamming it into a rotting forehead. The blood spurts. The body falls. We can't take this many on, not like this. Dad was right. We have to run. I unsheathe my knife as Herschel and the girls hobble across the courtyard, my eyes darting from face to face, from yellowed mouth to cloudy eyes to melted skin.

"Mouse?" I call out, feeling almost guilty for wanting to run off and save him. "Oh, my God!"

A body breaks apart from all the others. It reaches out for us, its fingers curved like scythes.

Beth squeals, terrified. "Get away from us!"

There's a disgusting SQUELCH as I drive my knife into its knee, the cold blood splattering my cheek. Twist. Pop. Its knee buckles.

Herschel and Beth scurry up the steps as I pull my knife out — I don't have to kill it. It'll only waste time — shouting coming from all directions as I watch another walker lunge for Herschel and Beth. He raises his crutch, bracing the rubber stub on its chest.

I stand up, ready to help.

As soon as I'm back on my feet, a loud alarm rings out, freezing me to the spot. Who turned those on?

"Harley!" My Dad's voice roars from across the courtyard. "Come here!"

"Let's go, girl!"

T-Dog takes my arm. I'm being dragged toward Dad, tryna spot everybody else. Rick, he's with Lori, Maggie, Carol, and Carl, shoving them all into a big, red cage, closing the door, and fending off more walkers with Glenn. Maggie shoots the lock. They huddle through the door to the prison. They're out. They're safe. Herschel and Beth, they're gone. I think — I hope — they managed to escape, too.

Where did all these walkers come from? We blocked the courtyard off, didn't we?

We reach the back of the courtyard. There's my Dad. He lowers his crossbow, a walker collapsing to the ground in front of him.

"Daddy!"

"Get over here!" He shouts, using his bow to bludgeon walker about to bite into his arm. "We gotta go! Gimme 'er!"

T-Dog shoves me forward.

Dad grabs my hand, his grip turning my skin a pure white, and we're running past walkers again, approaching a big, metal door.

He unholsters his gun and — BANG — shoots the lock off.

"Come on!"

"We can't close this behind us, man!" T worries as we run into the dark corridor, walkers following after us. "What we gonna do?"

Without answering, my Dad leads around a corner, cussing under his breath as he frantically looks around for another door.

After he takes us down what feels like a hundred more corridors, he finds one. "In 'ere! Quick!"

We slip inside. He slams the door shut, taking a step back, staring at it for a moment before it starts to shudder under the weight of the walkers pawing at it on the other side. No more running. God. We've trapped ourselves in here, but at least we're safe, at least we're alive. I wasn't so sure at first, but I can feel the blood pulsing through my muscles now, my breath leaving me in short, panicked bursts.

"Shit," My Dad pants hotly, his sweaty brow glistening even in the dark. "We okay? Baby, you okay?"

"I—I'm fine," I nod shakily, the blaring alarms suddenly cutting out. "W-What happened to everyone else?"

I think I managed to help Herschel and Beth get out safe, but we got separated before I could catch up to them. 

"I'on know," He admits, "I'on know. Seemed like we all scattered, but they'll look after each other. Least we're together."

The walker's shadows twitch and warp in black shapes against the grey of the floor, their fingers curling up underneath the bottom of the door like rotten little shrimps, tickling the metal with their chipped nails. They're wild dogs clawing at a rabbits' burrow, thirsting for blood.

When T-Dog doesn't respond, the only noise in this small, dusty room the snarls from outside, Dad asks, "T, man? You okay?"

I turn to look at him, the lack of sunlight making my eyes hurt.

T-Dog is staring at his feet like there's an interesting bug crawling on his ankle, wordless, looking up at us with wide eyes.

"Oh, my God," I breathe, watching the blood pour out.

There ain't no bug on his ankle.

There's a gaping bite.

"My sister used to babysit our neighbour's dog from time to time," T-Dog chuckles to himself, sat up against the wall opposite us. His legs are kicked out lazily in front of him, his smile plump and warm, like he's relaxing on his porch. The only thing missing is a cigarette between his fingers. I'on think he realizes that me and Dad ain't fully listening, or maybe he doesn't care. "Man, he was an ugly thing."

Already, this room smells like death, and there's nothing we can do except stew in it.

The door shudders violently in the background. 

"A lil' Scottish breed, or sum. One of them dogs with the big moustache and the angry eyes. Anyway," He sighs. It's difficult to look at him, in a way that makes me feel an aching sense of guilt for averting my eyes like this, but I just have to. I can't look at his smile anymore, or at the puddle of blood, or at the bite, or even at the walls, my gaze stuck unwaveringly on my boots. "There was this one weekend. She'd just got done takin' the lil' guy for a walk, and she was on the phone with her friend, talkin' about a party. 'Course, I was eavesdroppin'."

He wheezes a laugh to himself as my Dad continues to stare emptily at him, not entertained in the slightest.

"I thought to myself, 'Girl. Our parents are gonna kill you if they find out.' She was never the bookworm type, or anythin' like that. She was a bit of a bully, mind. Used to invite me to get ice-cream with her and her friends and make fun of me the whole time-type stuff."

Shut up, I wish I could shout in his face without angering the walkers outside, It doesn't matter now. You're bit!

When I thought I'd gotten scratched back at the quarry, I spent all night thinking of things that didn't matter, so maybe I can't blame him.

"I just got so jealous," He whispers, his smile fading, a sad look in his eyes. "I'on even know what pushed me to do it, but I went into the backyard and I opened the gate. Let the dog out. I knew I'd done the wrong thing when I saw the look on 'er face. I even went with her when she was puttin' up missin' posters all over our neighbourhood, shoutin' his name. Pepper, pepper. We ain't never found him."

"Don't you just sound like a pair'a angels," My Dad dares to joke.

He laughs. "That's what Grimes said."

That was back on the farm, when T was tryna make me feel better 'bout my fight with Carl by telling me a story 'bout his sisters stealing from him. He's always had the most ridiculous stories that make us all laugh, and he would let us, even if it was at his expense.

If I were to think about useless things, too, I'd think of him nicknaming me and Carl, little nerds, him sharing his pretzels with me while I was unwell, how he went with Rick and Dad to save me from Shane, those stupid shirts we got him and Glenn for Christmas.

"Well, ya know what they say about great minds," Dad mutters non-committedly, before there's another thud on the door.

"Daddy?"

"Hm?" He grunts, leaning toward me.

Into the shell of his ear, I shyly whisper, knowing he can't do nothin' about it, "I'on wanna be in here, no more. I wanna leave. Please."

"I know, chicken. I know," He soothes, putting his arm around my shoulders, cradling my head against his side. "M'sorry."

T-Dog asks, "What'd she say?"

"She don't like it in 'ere."

"Well, I'm sorry, too. I'm gonna die," He chuckles incredulously, his belly shuddering. "And all I can think about is that damn dog."

"How you feelin', man?"

"Like ten pounds of shit in a five-pound sack," T-Dog slurs, his head lolled onto his shoulder. "Thanks for askin'."

It's been hours since we trapped ourselves in this room. I can tell, not only because of the way my stomach has begun to roil with hunger and my mouth has gone dry like two pieces of sandpaper rubbing against each other, but because of poor T-Dog. His bald head is slathered in sweat, the droplets sliding down his face as if he's sitting under a showerhead, but I know it's the work of the germs inside his body.

Dad, Merle, and I saw this hitch-hiker get bitten back in the beginning, while we were staying with this group of people whose supplies we ended up stealing. They was the types to pick up needy travellers on the side of the road, even if they'd just been bitten.

Merle wanted to kill the guy when he found out, but it only took half a day for the bite on the man's leg to do it for him.

"I think we gotta start thinkin' about—," My Dad cuts himself off, before muttering, "What we gon' do."

"We wait here until somebody finds us," T-Dog insists, repeating the plan they had came up with hours ago. The walkers won't leave us alone with him bleeding all over the floor the way he is, and to go out there would be suicide. "It can't be much longer, now."

"I'm—," Dad sighs. "I ain't talkin' about the walkers, T. You know I ain't."

He nods his head in jerky movements.

"I-I know," He says.

"I'on think they're gonna find us before it matters." His way of saying, Before you turn. "I— I can't have you in here with Harley."

When T-Dog doesn't have anything to say in reply, Dad forces himself to continue. "So... I got a bullet or a bolt. That's where we're at."

"No." He adjusts himself against the wall, lifting his head to look him in the eye. "I don't want you to."

"I know," He placates. "I'm sor—"

"I'mma do it myself," He says matter-of-factly. "I'm a man of God. It might be a sin to take myself out, but I'll be damned if I fought this hard and got this far, only to let another man kill me. Even if he's my brother. So, I'm doin' this on my own terms. It has to be me."

Stomaching his words, my Dad slowly nods to himself, before he sends me a sympathetic look.

T-Dog bides his time for a couple more hours by telling us what must be every story he has, but it's after he throws up into the corner of the room that it becomes obvious to us that we just can't afford to wait any longer for the group to find us.

"We ain't gonna be sappy about this," T-Dog warns us as he sits back down, wiping his mouth.

"C'mon. You're one'a the sappiest bastards I know," Dad deadpans. "And I know a lotta sappy bastards."

"I guess I just always wanted to go out in a blaze of glory, if I had to."

"You don't want yer last moments to be with us?"

Coughing up a laugh, T-Dog jokes, "I didn't say that."

I almost want to ask him to wait just one more minute — That's not a long time. He could do it — and after that minute passes, I'd ask him again. I know it wouldn't save his life if the group found us right now, but I wouldn't be asking for them, or even for him. I'd be asking for myself. Selfishly, I want just one more minute with him. What if—? What if he didn't get any sicker? What if he turns out fine?

It's a question only a fool would ask, and I know all I can do now is appreciate all the thousands of minutes he had before this.

"Okay," He sighs, reaching behind him, pulling out his gun and resting it in his lap, staring down at it. "This is it."

It ain't how my Momma did it, but it's just as awful.

"We could still wait," My Dad suggests, giving him an out I know he won't take. "If they find us, they find us. If they don't—..."

"You heard me, man. Blaze of glory." He looks up at us, his sweaty fingers gently curled around the gun. For the first time since the door closed, he meets my gaze, but he just looks tired, like he could use a long, peaceful sleep. "This is gonna be hard. I'm sorry."

I watched Shane die in front of me, watched him bleed much the same way. At least this time, I'll get the chance to close my eyes.

"You're a tough girl," He gulps. "You been through more shit than most."

"Thought'chu said we wasn't gonna be sappy," I complain, just to get him to stop.

"The first time I saw you, I just knew you were gonna be a lil' terror." He continues, anyway. "Dale, too. Said he knew you'd make it."

Dale always did say the darndest things. The only reason I've made it this far is because of other people. I ain't no clueless airhead can't skin no animal or kill no walker, but my beatin' heart can be accredited to a small group of people, one that includes T-Dog. There's been countless times where I should'a died and didn't, and this is one of them times that somebody else shouldn't be dying, but is.

I ain't special. Just because I ain't died yet don't mean everybody else can't still be alive, too. My Dad says, Ain't no such thing as good or bad luck. Just strong people, but T-Dog ain't weak and there is such a thing as bad luck.

"I thought you would, too," I tell him, hoping it's some sorta comfort.

"C'mere," Dad mumbles, helping me climb into his lap and rubbing his big hand between my shoulder blades as I press my brow to his neck, squeezing my eyes shut. He takes out my hearing aids, and after that, I don't open my eyes for the next few hours.

Like this, I can pretend it didn't happen.

But I can still smell the gunpowder in the air.

"Hush little baby, don't say a word," My Dad's voice rasps quietly in my ear, "Daddy's gonna buy you a mockingbird."

I've never wanted to leave a room more than I want to leave this one in my entire life. If I could, I think I'd claw my way out.

"And if that mockingbird don't sing, Daddy's gonna buy you a diamond ring."

The singing helps. It don't make the smell any more bearable, but it helps.

"And if that diamond ring turns brass, Daddy's gonna buy you a looking glass."

One more minute, I tell myself just like I wanted to tell T-Dog, one more minute, and then another after that. The others have an entire prison to search for us in, with twists and turns every few feet, dust in the air and walkers lining the corridors, and I can't even guarantee they ain't already dealing with the deaths of any of our other people, but I know they'll refuse to stop until they find us.

I keep replaying the scene of the courtyard in my head, remembering everyone who I saw made it out.

"And if that looking glass gets broke," He sings, "Daddy's gonna buy you a billy goat."

Sometime later, I realize I've managed to block out the sound of the incessant groaning because there's suddenly another noise amongst it all — A grunt too pronounced to come from a walker, then a squelch and a dull thud, like a sack of flour dropping to the floor.

Lifting my head from Dad's shoulder, I look at the door as the groaning becomes lesser and lesser until it disappears.

"They're here. They're here," I say in shock, climbing off Dad's lap just as the door is opened.

"Holy shit," Glenn exclaims as Maggie wraps her arms around me, returning my brutal hug. "You're here."

"We drew them away," She says, pressing a kiss to my cheek. "Oh, I can't believe it. We searched everywhere for y'all."

It's when she pulls away that I make the mistake of following her and Glenn's gazes into the corner of the room, where T lay exactly where I last saw him, the only difference being that his brains are now plastered against the wall in the shape of a flower.

"Don't look," Dad gently scolds me, turning me back around so I'm facing the door.

She stares at the carnage, her lips slightly parted without knowing what to say, before she has to look away, too. "What happened?"

"He got bit," Dad mutters. It's impossible to recount what we just went through in any poetic way, and the rest, they can guess.

"Horrible," She croaks.

"We can come back for him later," Glenn struggles to say, urging all of us outta the room. "Let's get you two back to the cell block."

"Is everyone okay?" I ask him desperately.

As the door closes on T-Dog, Glenn gazes down at me, his face just as exhausted-looking as Dad's, but with a slight glint in his eyes.

"Everyone's okay," He manages to smile, glancing at Maggie before he adds, "Even the new baby."

I look up at my Dad, his shock mirroring mine. "Lori had her baby?"

And that right there is good luck.

Glenn steps over a body. "Come on."

Author's Note.

In exchange for T-Dog's especially intense death, Lori lives.

I went over SO many iterations for this chapter after receiving a comment suggesting I consider letting Lori and T-Dog live, and honestly, this version was the most suitable one. I decided the other versions were either just too indulgent or didn't fit with the story, but I liked them, too 😭

Thank you to ermynee, because without them/you, Lori would also be dead right now!

I hated doing that to T-Dog, but I thought it would make for an interesting non-canon scene and wanted to balance out the fact that Lori lives. You'll see also that Carol doesn't get lost, so the whole 'getting stuck and being found' situation was given to these guys instead. RIP T-Dog.

Thank you for reading. Always appreciate you! 💙

@poetoflawed

[scattered-irises]

Part V: Helix of Memories

Another prequel to the Dysonia AU.

More references to the Illusory Paradise...annnnnndd it's all Vocaloid characters. Whoops. Ah, well, you get a small paragraph on Christopher.

Rating: General

Word Count: 1914

Characters: Luka, Miku, Rin

Relationships: Background Luka/Gackpo

Warnings: Talks about human cloning

“Clones…? Count me out of it,” scoffs Rin. 

Luka looks at her sister in surprise. 

“I thought you, out of everyone else, would have been most excited about this proposal,” she remarks. 

Rin puts her hands on her hips. 

“On the contrary, if you actually thought about it,” she mutters. 

She gives Luka a sharp glare. 

“Human cloning is one of the things I would never support as a geneticist.”

“Why?” asks Miku, popping up from their sofa. “Wouldn’t it be nice to have a way to remember someone like that?”

Rin purses her lips and shakes her head. 

“There’s too many environmental factors to ensure a perfect clone. Plus, they won’t even have the original’s memories, so there’s no point,” she adds. 

“What if that was the only way for you to see them again?” ventures Luka. 

Her younger sister stares at the floor while Miku makes a humming sound. Rin’s eyebrows slowly furrow, a frown appearing on her lips. 

“Don’t tell me you’re seriously considering that man’s proposal,” begins Rin. 

A long silence fills the room. Luka feels Miku’s judgemental gaze on her, hot as coals. Many years ago, Rin had worked under Dr. Realist’s supervision alongside Luka. After a long argument on the ethics of experimenting on extracted human brains, Rin had left the lab in a furious storm. Even now, her name tag continues to stare at her from the breakroom’s fridge. 

“It’s impossible!” continues Rin. She takes off her red-rimmed glasses and looks directly at Luka. “They’ll send you off to who-knows-where! Your mind wouldn’t be able to last…!” 

“I agree,” adds Miku. “Being in space for that long…It would be far too isolating.” 

Luka wets her lips and looks at her sisters. Rin had just returned home from work, evidenced by her irritability. Her lab coat hangs from one arm, the bow on her head crooked. Miku meanwhile, seemed to reflect Rin’s inner worries. 

“I…it’s still a few years off,” begins Luka. “That’s why I wanted to ask now, if you were willing to donate some of your DNA samples…”

Making a sound of disgust, Rin turns away from Luka and begins to walk upstairs. 

“Count me out of it,” she snarls. “I’ll have nothing to do with that man.”

In the silence that follows, Luka slowly turns to Miku, who holds her with a stony gaze. 

“You won’t be able to change her mind, you know,” says Miku. 

Luka lets out a sigh and nods. 

“I know.” 

Turning back to her computer, Miku continues typing up song lyrics. For a moment, Luka listens to the pitter pattering of her sister’s keyboard. Out of all of them, only Miku had pursued the arts. It never ceased to amaze Luka how easily lyrics flowed from Miku’s mind. And her voice…! Bright, warm and sweet, just like an angel’s. Their entire family was all good at singing, but Miku had long proven that she was the best. 

It seemed like everyone in her family had their own talents and their own destinies. Their oldest sister Meiko was a skilled manager, boosting Miku’s popularity to the top. Their older brother Kaito was a savvy businessman. Rin was one of the best geneticists in the city. Her twin, Len, was a renowned journalist. And Luka…her destiny was to the stars, far far away from everyone she knew and loved. 

Why did it have to be her?

“That Dr. Realist…How much do you trust him?” Miku asks suddenly. 

Taken aback, Luka runs her eyes across her sister’s screen. 

I gaze up at the stars in the transparent sky

I'm unable to fly, all I can do is cry

I've been wounded up alone, and whenever I feel lonely

"You came here to help me..."

The lyrics are oddly chilling, causing Luka to take a step back. 

Dr. Realist…She had been with him from the very beginning. They had their disagreements, but where it truly mattered, they were in lockstep. His dream was also her dream. In spite of his mercurial nature and carelessly dispensed insults about the human race, they shared a deep desire to save mankind. 

“I trust him with my entire being,” says Luka. “I know he doesn’t seem so, but he’s a true genius. He’ll be the one to save us all.”

Miku makes another humming sound. A pang twists Luka’s heart. On the distant STELLA colony, would there be anyone who would hum the same way Miku did? Surrounded by nothing but stars and the blackness of space, would there be anything remotely familiar? 

“I’m willing to give you the needed samples, but you must promise me something,” proposes Miku. 

“Yes?” 

Miku turns back, green eyes sparkling with amusement. 

“My clones are only allowed off of earth, alright? I don’t want to have to deal with an imposter!” she teases. 

Luka gives her sister an easy grin. 

“Of course. I’ll keep all your samples close to me at all times.”

Miku beams. 

“Good! Gumi’s songs about running into her clones always made me uneasy…”

Luka laughs at the mention of their neighbor. 

“I’ll be sure to ask her if she wants to donate,” she says. 

“You probably won’t have to ask…she’d volunteer!”

The sisters share an easy laugh. Their neighbor was always trying new things, it seemed. One time it was skydiving. Next, it was starting a podcast on kappa hunting. Yes, Luka definitely had to ask if Gumi wanted her clones on STELLA. She would add much-needed joy to the loneliness of space. 

Miku leans her head on the back of the sofa and looks back at Luka. A hint of sadness fills her expression. 

“In all seriousness…please treat my clones well…As you’ve done for me, I want you to watch over them and prevent them from falling into despair. Easy enough, right? ”

A nervous laugh crawls up Luka’s throat. She holds Miku’s gaze.

“That was a given,” says Luka. 

Happiness was so difficult to maintain and keep. 

Miku grins. 

“Does Gackpo know?”

Luka pauses. Her stomach does a small flip upon thinking about her fiancé. She looks down at her garnet ring. He had been so patient, waiting all of those years for her. Would he be able to bear the news that they would never marry, her body shipped off into the depths of space for eternity? 

“...Not yet,” admits Luka. 

Miku quirks an eyebrow. 

“You don’t want a clone of him on your colony?”

Luka looks out the window. A light drizzle has begun, dotting the window with small teardrops. 

“I don’t think so,” says Luka after a few moments. 

“Oh?” 

She thinks of Gackpo’s deep blue eyes and gentle smile. She thinks of running her hands down his chiseled jaw. His soft, purple hair and supple skin. His soothing, deep voice. Her lips tremble. She would have to leave him behind, along with all of her wishes and dreams on earth. 

A happy marriage. A normal family. A normal life. 

Having a clone of him would be a constant reminder of all she had lost. 

“He wouldn’t like the idea,” Luka replies quietly. 

“I see…”

To have a Gackpo that didn’t remember her, who couldn’t touch her, who couldn’t love her, would be merely a cheap copy. 

“What about your coworkers? Like that Christopher?” asks Miku. 

The thought of her coworker makes Luka pause. Whenever she looked at him, she couldn’t help but feel a twinge of pity. He always seemed so sad, his bangs framing his long face with its sunken eyes. Would giving his clone another life on her colony result in a happier Christopher? She doesn’t know what to think of the idea. What would he be if he hadn’t been a scientist? On the colony, would he gaze out at the stars, searching for the dilapidated earth? Would he sing beneath the stars, glad to be rid of the bright moon? 

A small smile fills Luka’s lips when she thinks of Christopher singing. 

“I’ll think about it,” she replies. 

Miku types up a few more lyrics, humming beneath her breath. Luka watches as she writes, the melody filling her with sadness. 

The wish constituting such a desire

was absorbed into the deep, deep, darkness

The words I muttered helplessly

resound aimlessly in this room

It seems like the only one left behind in this world is me

“What’s this song about?” asks Luka. 

Miku doesn’t turn back to look at her, intensely gazing at her screen. 

“The loneliness of a wish granter,” she replies. 

“Interesting…”

“Actually, I think you’d be perfect for the song,” she adds. 

“Me?!”

“Mmhm!” 

Miku turns back, beaming. 

“I’m thinking of naming it The Lone Cell of the Stella Theatre,” she declares. 

“Well…!” 

“Being surrounded by clones of all your loved ones…won’t you be sad that they won’t remember you?” asks Miku.

The faces of Luka’s siblings fill her mind. The countless memories they made of singing and laughing together would have to be enough to carry her into eternity. The things their clones would do without her would be a gentle reminder of those moments. As the STELLA colony’s mind, she would know them, yet they would only see her as a distant god. 

Luka’s throat is dry. As STELLA, she would become an onlooker, forever shut out of the human world. She needed something to remind her that she was once human. 

Luka forces a smile and tilts her head. 

“Only a little bit. It’s enough for me to see all of you smiling,” she replies. 

“You’ll be a benevolent ruler then,” says Miku with a small smile. “How many times do you think you’ll clone me?”

Luka gives a small shrug. 

“Every hundred to two hundred years or so…just enough so that the people there won’t notice I’m cloning my lovely little sister.”

Miku giggles. 

“Maybe in one of my clones’ lives, they’ll be an idol-nun,” she jokes.  

“An idol-nun?!” echoes Luka incredulously.

Her sister shrugs, rolling her shoulders and then humming. 

“That was the first thing that came to mind. She could be a nun by day, idol by night.”

“Life on the colonies isn’t going to be like a manga!” protests Luka. 

“Are you sure? It sounds a lot like one from all you’ve told me,” says Miku, unwrapping a candy bar. 

She breaks it in half and offers it to Luka. Taking the candy, Luka takes a nibble and sighs. To many, Dr. Realist’s proposal sounded like a sci-fi novel or a pipe dream. Only a few were truly willing to believe him. The idea of sending a lone human to control and become a space colony seemed absurd, after all. 

“Laugh at me all you like, but it’ll come true someday,” says Luka resolutely. 

A hint of melancholy fills Miku’s face. She contemplates her candy bar and then bites into it. She chews methodically, with Luka silently counting how many times her sister chews before swallowing. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Swallow. 

Miku looks out the window, where the rain continues to fall. Meiko’s geraniums were starting to bend beneath the intensifying rain. Luka makes a mental note to heat up her sister’s favorite sake before she comes home. Miku was probably thinking the same thing. 

“I know,” sighs Miku after a moment of pondering the rain. “I’ll miss you when you’re gone.”

Placing a hand on Miku’s shoulder, Luka offers her sister a small smile. 

“We still have a few years left. Let’s enjoy them while we can.” 

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

blargh blargh BLARGH. bloom into you rant touko my aro-coded theater queer im suddenly salty for you

the live reaction experience of getting to the last chapters of the Bloom Into You yuri manga as they were being released and thinking with increasing baffled passion that Yuu and Sayaka should've jumped from mutually respectful rivalry over how to best be a friend to Touko, to cozy not dramatic very competitive girlfriends with each other while their tall dark tragic theater girl realizes her one true love was the stage all along

Touko's story arc was so much bigger in scope than a confession of love to someone who's ancillary to all of it could ever satisfyingly wrap up (to ME) (my opinion means nothing except to me sself) she felt like a fully completed character with romance slapped on top last minute like a discount price tag sticker

her whole thing about being the one declaring her love and asking for kisses specifically with a girl who thinks she can't love anyone and then we find out Touko's been an actress this whole time not coping with grief by pretending to be her dead big sister only to find out said sister wasn't so extraordinary actually and Touko's perfect persona is almost nothing like her and Touko's need to do and be everything her sister couldn't is a whole thing

and who better to act out the quintessential highschool love and lust that you think you should be into but just can't bring yourself to try out, than with a partner who'll never be hurt by it not being real. What is more ace or aro than experiencing things you personally don't click with via a fictional character you can inhabit without worrying about long term real life consequences or connections to the real you, and finding out that it CAN be fun in that situation, with that distance

Touko's attracted to someone who says she can't fall in love and Touko makes that a requirement of their relationship that Yuu won't fall in love with her

(i know i know there's a Lot of reasons for her to do this i don't care im lost in the aro vibes)

but then Yuu does fall in love because whoops maybe she was gay this whole time after all and just didn't feel anything for the guy who asked her out

meanwhile Touko's long time bestie confesses HER love for Touko too

and im reading this screaming LET THE ARO-CODED GIRL ESCAPE THIS MADNESS LET THEsE TWO DATE EACH OTHER AND LEAVE HER BE!!!

by the end theater girl is out there moving past her trauma living her best normal girl life as a stage actress who's allowed to be imperfect off stage, and she has no idea her bestie had gotten a girlfriend until Yuu tells her

then a side story comes out and Sayaka the former Touko unrequited romantic suitor ended dating a girl who looks Exactly Like Yuu

in my head there's a sequel when they're in their thirties figuring out Hey Wait A Second with a dash of Maybe The AroAce Who Likes Having Girlfriends Was Touko All Along

(maybe Yuu and Sayaka should date about it) (maybe Touko can kiss her friends sometimes and go on dates with them for fun without it having to be romantic) (maybe Yuu's athletic childhood bestie meets the Yuu look alike and Sayaka finally gets one amicable fully mutual break up under her belt)

maybe my problem is that writers put so much effort into the pre-relationship but then treat the confession as the end, the resulting happiness a boring given, and almost never reward me with actually getting to see what the relationship itself looks like, when it's the whole thing I spent all this time waiting for and cheering on. Which makes the relationship feel empty and hollow (to me) compared to the other connections that DID get shown and established and grown into

maybe that's a silly thing to think about a highschool romance story.

maybe this is why im more and more only reading stories with relationships already established pre-canon so i don't have to worry about burning energy on something that won't make me go !!! by the end of it

maybe there's also stories where, even though the characters aren't officially together yet, they're still together enough for their dynamic to shift and settle into something that FEEELS like what they'll have for the rest of their lives no matter if they've confessed to each other or not

maybe bloom into you was very well made and STILL missed the mark for me so hard i stopped reading the entire genre, because if something THIS GOOD still could fundamentally not work for me, im just probably reading in the entirely wrong section of the romance isle

maybe i need to start sleeping again my brain feels like a gently poked sunny side up egg in a frying pan

[versegm]

Ok actually after a discussion with a friend I decided to run some more statistics re: fanfics and engagement, so here (statistics taken off my own fanfics):

General results:

I did both the median and the average to try to smooth out any statistical outlier, but the results were roughly the same lmao

Roughly, 11,20% of readers drops a kudo after clicking on a fic (which I assume to be a good baseline for "amount of readers who clicked here on purpose and didn't quit midway through")

On average, 2,8% of readers bookmark a fic after reading it (would be curious to know if that's a general thing? Because don't really write shippy fics or the "popular" stuff so that might incurs statistical bias. If anyone else is willing to run some numbers I'd love to know.)

On average, 0,88% of readers drop a comment after the fact.

Hypotheses:

I included the release date (or something close to) of each fandom to see if there was a correlation between ratio of comments vs age of the fanbase. There was none.

There are some fandoms where I actively linked my fics everywhere and got involved with people ect ect. I included that as well to see if there was a correlation between ratio of comments vs how much it was promoted. There was not. (It is possible that people directly dmed me their impressions instead of leaving a comment, in which case sorry guys I hold your compliments close to my heart but they were unfortunately lost to time.)

I wanted to add whether or not the fandom was currently active, but that's... actually really hard to gauge (what metric to use? Amount of fics uploaded on ao3 daily? Amount of new tweets under a given hashtag?) so I didn't.

Conclusion: I couldn't find any specific reasons for these numbers so uh I guess "10% of people bother finishing your fic/3% will like it enough to bookmark it/1% will go the extra step to tell you about it" is the default, and any deviation from that norm is fandom specific.

Fandom-specific observations:

Biggest ratio of comments/hits goes to all my Fate/Stay Night & Fate/Grand Order crossover fics, weirdly enough. Either 1) the fsn fandom is really generous in comments, or 2) the fact that it's a crossover means that it attracts two very different crowds which leads to twice the usual amount of comments.

The dubious award of having the worst ratio of comments/hits goes to the Amphibia fandom with a whooping 0,41%, half as much as any other fandom. Jesus Christ. That being said it is a fandom mostly populated by kids (I think?) which is probably (?) not the case for these other fandoms.

This is a fate blog so I do have to point out that the second worst ratio of comments/hits goes to the Fate/Grand Order fandom, so I can only encourage you guys to actually comment on the fics you like.

AI: The Somnium Files has a nearly 20% of kudos per hit. Though the ao3 tag is also not very active (last I checked it could go weeks without any update) so it might be a case of "we're so starved for new fics we'll read anything at this point."

TL;DR:

It seems like on average, 10% of people drop a kudo, 3% will like it enough to bookmark it, and 1% will go the extra step of leaving a comment. If you're a fic writer and you are despairing over the amount of attention your fic gets, worry not- that is normal.

[xxswagcorexx]

tumblr user xxswagcorexx why do you insist on hiding away half your analyses/ramblings in the tags of your posts speak ur truth!!! anyway talk mythology andor symbolism to me whats the significance behind red's cult eating honey? do either of them get any items of power mixed up sometimes but just go whoops and move on like its no big deal? what would an outsider pov on this mess look like "ah that pair of lunatic gods again" bc this is sooo funny to me to imagine

i am . scared of everyone (and plus i don't wanna make the post too long and tags let me ramble without worrying abt length/mention small things without feeling like i need to format it properly ^_^

and uh abt the honey thing. this is where u can see this is Really inspired by greek mythology but basically in greek mythology, honey was seen as food of the gods and would provide gods immortality and whatnot ^_^ anyways i was like "hmmmmmm reddoons core" but also it just really works well. aesthetically for him

(AND GET READY FOR A LONG RAMBLE UNDER THE CUT)

anyways on the topic of the honey thing, i tend to associate red with gold because 1) money and 2) red and gold are a really classic color combo that i love, so honey (sorta) resembling molten gold is just. really aesthetically pleasing to me

and also iirc red wanted to make the byzantine empire in earthbound season 2? and when i came across a video on how to make byzantine honey fritters by tasting history with max miller i was like "omg reddoons core"--and from the video it seems like honey was a bit of a special dessert? in 6:33 of the video, there's a poem about a monk complaining about how the abbots have it a lot better than the monks and they mention that the abbots had 2nd helping of honey fritters so yeah i think its safe to assume honey was a semi-special thing, even if it was common. so uh. yeah. money and reddoons. thumbs up

and for the longest time i have associated bees and honey by rina sawayama with. swagdoons in general and the entire song is about how much the singer loves money and partying even if they're broke as shit LMAO its such a good bop if you like pop i recommend it . anyways ya that just added to the aesthetic in general

(as u can tell most of it was based off of vibes and plus in biased because i like how. warm milk and honey taste and plus i really like the idea of milk being something nurturing and honey being something sweet that is representative of love bc ur being sweet and easing someone into something so. Yeah. just vibes but how i figure out vibes are so specific that its worth explaining i think <- loves romanticizing the mundane) (and there's a sick ass line from the end poem like that) (like "And the player was a new human, never alive before, made from nothing but milk and love. You are the player. The story. The program. The human. Made from nothing but milk and love." come ON that line fucks so hard how couldn't i love it)

anyways i think with all of that in mind, red's cult would eat honey as a sign of wealth and comfort/nurturing 4 those reasons ^_^ (i am so sorry for all of that for explaining that i just have lots of Reasons to why i feel something sometimes)

WILDLY OFF TOPIC but u also asked abt items of power getting mixed up, i think it would happen most during worship </3 i think they'd just go to each other and be like "REDDOONS one of your cult members sacrificed blood as a loyalty pact to their partner instead of WAR again. u want it" and red would either let ash keep it or take it so uh. insert them sharing their power with each other here even though their values are usually on increasing ur ego and being on top of the world (CONSIDERING THIS FANDOM LOVES THEMES OF LOYALTY IN A GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL WAY) (SEE WHY I DDNT WANT THEM COMING FROM ANOTHER GOD OR MERGING INTO 1 GOD) (THE IMPLICATIONS ARENT GOOD)

anyways i think ash and red (as gods) and their cults are pretty well known (like how swagdoons r the 2nd most popular ls ship) but LORD if their myths got lost to time they'd be a nightmare to study via texts and scripts in the future. like i can imagine for the LONGEST time historians argue if they were gods that changed during the dark ages because red's name predates ash until they Finally find a myth involving them as 2 different characters and its settled that they're 2 separate gods even though they represent similar-ish things LOL anyways yeah i can imagine more myths of them being found and historians going ??? wtd were these gods <3 hope that answers ur questions anon! :D

[void-tiger]

please tell me more about the fic where Ke/th doesnt get to be a paladin again, i keep seeing shit like how the team abandoned/failed Ke/ith and should have apologized to him when it was literally the opposite (i am sorry but the team almost DIED because K/ith fucked off to run off with the Blades, werent for Kuron entering Black they would have actually died, i do not understand how anyone can see this and say the team was in the wrong/Ke1th was in the right, and still be considered a team player let alone a team leader is beyond me. Really really sorry about salt in your askbox)

No worries! (Although, disclaimer: I had to set aside my voltron fics for a bit ‘cause I can’t work on them without getting salty, and too much salt is bad for you. So they’re…curing, I guess. I’ll stop with the bad salt jokes now XD)

But short answer? Keith’s their comfort blorbo, and it’s incredibly easy to have that become “can do no wrong ever it MUST be EVERYONE else!” and…not recognize that kneejerk bias. Ask The Real Fandom Olds TM who’ve participated in fandom culture since the 80s and 90s and that’s a key issue with Current Fandom and especially younger fans (ie, probably our generation and younger.) Add in that a lot of us online trend (in my antidotal experience) towards having untreated anxiety or depressive symptoms and/or undiagnosed neurodivergent brain wiring that an individual might’ve not quite learned how to cope with yet (and many come with emotional regulation symptoms) in addition to…human brains really just Don’t stop developing until mid20s regardless of someone’s birth gender and brain development is particularly chaotic and…well.

That’s a recipe for a volatile fandom, and since the VLD Characters in particular were geared towards Teens or Teen Nostalgia? [Comfort Blorboing Intensifies.]

Now, in one fic series Idea, Keith DOES become the Red Paladin again, but he has to work for it. Really work for it. Like, the Team is still incredibly hurt that he left and never really apologized for ditching them before THAT Scene where Jiro is forced to step in s4. I think I have in my notes somewhere [coughs] prolly a random post or very buried DM to a friend that Red Lion finally outright takes Keith for a joy ride (much like Blue and Black did with Lance and Shiro) and literally has him bouncing around in zero g and gforces until Red’s really willing to accept him back as Paladin. (Also it makes me feel better.)

[tags: blackbox verse, rewrite the stars, blackbox, veeladee fixit. Note that some of the older posts especially I’ve probably discarded. But I do my best worldbuilding thinking aloud, and hey. It’s fanfic. Who gives af about spoilers? Not me.]

But, in Blackbox verse, I wanted Jiro to have his very own Lion…and the Sincline Meteor is right there. Plus, y’know. Fixing-fixing. Making as much work as I felt like since it was intended to be a series, anyway.

Buuut, that’s not the fic idea you asked about.

The one you asked about is actually a Redo of The Black Paladin’s episode following alteanroyals’ prompt of “what if Shiro’s the one who fights the clone, and the clone gets to just come home. Have his own name.” Because, c’mon. The visuals would’ve been incredible, and Josh Keaton and Studio Mir adores Shiro and Jiro even if the EPs and arguably NONE of the writers (even the better ones trying to patch job before bailing out) gave a shit about Jiro as his own character.

So. Back to Keith.

He actually tries flying Black Lion, same as the (egh) canonical episode…and…

WHOOPS. He gets lasers shot at him for his efforts (hA HA~)

Allura steps in, and has a battle of wills against Black Lion, then realizes that what has Black so torqued is Keith tried to dominate the Lion. (Imo? The only reason why Keith could fly with Black in s2-4 was because of the bond they both had with Shiro. “Help me help you.”) And well. Allura’s learned a thing or two: trying to dominate a Lion does NOT work. She learned that for herself with White Lion, she’s now realizing that’s why Black Lion accepted Shiro as it’s Paladin over Zarkon at all. So Allura changes tactics, senses Shiro’s Quintessence still inside Black Lion nearly two years after he vanished, and calls the others in. They do a reverse-balmera ceremony via their voltron bonds and pull Shiro back out—in his OWN body, tyvm.

And well. Remember how it’s technically a “Shiro vs CloneShiro” prompt? Yeah, they fight. (I’ll try not to have them totally wreck the place. All Shiros are Good Shiros.) And when Black Lion comes for them now that the Lion can get a clear shot? Red Lion also comes.

Because Keith isn’t the only character who holds the needed qualities for a Red Paladin. (Reactive instincts, laser focus, loyalty, but often emotionally volatile.) Jiro does too. And unlike Keith, Jiro stayed even when he “no longer” had a Lion to fly from his POV, and he struggled with the rest of the Team to adjust to Lions that no longer suited them in the wake of Shiro’s Absence. So Red chooses Jiro and flies to him. (Black would’ve saved Jiro, too, even though Jiro wasn’t Black’s true paladin. But seeing a Lion accept him, and further proof that he’s not just a poor copy but his own person and even a Paladin in his own right?)

[gemini fic, shiro vs jiro]

Basically, in starting writing and continuing to ruminate on ideas, I realized that Gemini works best as a single fic, so having Firm Consequences make more sense. Other tidying up?

-Allura and the Paladins take the Castle and immediately head out for the Altean Colony while Shiro (and Black Lion at Black’s literal insistence) go after Jiro. (And with Shiro here to lead and analyze + Convenient Recap/Alternate Explanation, Pidge is able to shut down the virus far earlier before it makes the Castle truly dead in the water.) Haggar never gets her claws into them.

-Keith formally leaves the Blades. He had a family, and he turned his back on them. Those relationships won’t be what they were before (ie, symbolic in losing his Red Paladinship), but this time he’s willing to put the work in to repair their trust in him. Meanwhile, the Blades never were going to help him find his mother intentionally no matter how many times he sacrificed his life for them, and his life and the lives of all the other Blades ultimately meant very little to Kolivan and the Blades as an organization. He surrenders the knife to Krolia, and walks away if Team Voltron will let him stay. It not, he can do better good with the Rebels. (Infiltration was Pidge’s thing, anyway. He’s the showy diversion maker.)

-Lotor returns to Orionde. But when he faces the Ancients and White Lion again, he stops attacking and running from his sins. He sacrifices his full life force, and the Drained Alteans revive fully restored. The tragedy his family caused and he ended up perpetuating ends with him. (That does leave…y’know. The Galran Empire without an Emperor. But hey. IF I finish this fic, that’s potential sequel material, baby!)

-

…anyway. Point is, Keith Antis put a bad taste in my mouth, but the point of “Keith loses Red” wasn’t to punish Keith (okay…maybe a little. But that was still mostly Black blasting lasers everywhere. For catharsis.) The point was, “There are consequence, and while some relationships can be repaired or make new ones with the same people after you’ve hurt them, others can’t. You lose them. It’s important to put in the work, but it’s also important to accept loss and endings, especially after you’ve fucked up.”

And well. I felt that Keith Losing Red, Jiro Gaining Red made things narratively tidy.

[loosesodamarble]

Hi Erika! 💙 Thank you again for all of the wonderful discussion about the world’s best grumpy, tsundere spatial mage. You always have such wonderful and thoughtful ideas, and your headcanons are so spot on and delightful! 😊 It’s switching gears a bit, but I wanted to ask you about Demon Slayer (I’ve been on a bit of a KNY kick—lots of excitement for Season 3 I think). I apologise if you’ve already answered this somewhere in a past post, but who are your favourite Demon Slayer characters? Thanks dear! 💕

Hello hello, Acacia~! Sorry for taking forever and a half to answer your question but here's the answer now! (Also gonna tag you @acacia-may to make sure you see this because it's been so long.)

This ask has been sitting in the inbox so long that Season 3 of the anime is currently airing now. Whoops! 😅🤣 I don't think I've answered this exact question regarding my KnY faves, especially since I mostly post Black Clover... So thanks for making me think of Demon Slayer again~! 💖

Now for my favorites, I think I'm gonna go ahead and start with some honorable mentions before listing a Top 5.

I'm gonna talk a lot so the meat of this post will be under the cut.

..........

Honorable mentions

I've talked about how similar Zenitsu and I are to each other and that's why he's an honorable mention. I vibe with the kid. He's so funny with how extra complainy he is about... everything. Poor child. (Side note: the store I work at sells some KnY character pens and the Zenitsu ones don't sell well and I lowkey feel bad about that.)

And Tanjirou is the MC. He's so sweet and kind to his friends. But he's a strong-willed fighter and knows what's right for everyone. Killing demons is how he saves humans threatened by demons and humans who have become demons. I love the way he learns in each arc, whether it be something emotional or in terms of how he fights. His worldview and morality don't really change but I do feel like he experiences growth nonetheless.

Top 5 Faves

5) Sanemi: I like this jerk, okay? I am drawn to jerk older brothers who secretly love and want to protect their siblings (Nacht, Nozel, and Sanemi have a little club in my mind.) He's a little off-putting at first but you know there's depth to his character when we see how he speaks to Kagaya with such respect. He acts rough but he's thoughtful deep down. And his bond with his mother and Genya! Like! This man is soft deep down, let me have it!

4) Nezuko: Before Nacht was my tumblr pfp, it was actually Nezuko. She is the cutest sister character in any series I've read (which actually isn't that many but sssshhhhhh!). I love her anti-demon flames. I love how she's allowed to fight and get bloody (mostly because she has a healing factor and can get absolutely wrecked but come back from it). She doesn't get to say a lot but she still has strong moments. Like how Tanjirou dreams of her telling him not to worry about their family not having nice things and to just try his best. Gosh, when that got animated I cried... I love Nezuko so much... Baby...

3) Mitsuri: Mitsuri is such a sweetheart! She's one of the two KnY characters that I'd date if given the chance. I love how she carries herself. She wears her heart on her sleeve whether she be happy or sad. Like, her second introduction to Tanjirou is crying openly in front of him. In the present, she's not afraid to be vulnerable. Her story in the second light novel is also really nice as it shows how Mitsuri became the open-hearted gal she is in the present. She went from feeling self-conscious about her reason for being in the Corps to learning how she brings cheer to people's lives and that renewing her convictions. She knows the Corps members have hard lives but her attitude doesn't make light of it. It's okay to have cheer after hardship because bogging oneself in pessimism will only hurt. Also, and this might be me bragging a little but I actually used Mitsuri and Obanai's failed romance in a college essay about romance literature in Japan. It was a silly little essay but to be able to cite one of my favorite mangas for a college assignment was fun (and actually my second time doing it. First time was talking about Daki and Gyuutarou in regards to depictions of "geisha"). I just love Mitsuri a lot and would love to be more like her (attitude, appearance, and ability-wise honestly...).

2) Kyoujurou: I love this man so much that I saw the movie in theaters and cried all three times because man does his death really hit hard in the anime. Kyoujurou is bright and warm and inspiring. While he's unable to help Tanjirou regarding the Dance of the Fire God, he still offers to make Tanjirou and the other boys his students. I think it's a mix of genuinely seeing their potential and just wanting the chance to teach the younger generation but it's kinda hilarious how quickly he latches onto the trio. I really like Kyoujurou's philosophy on life, how the fleeting nature of it is what makes it beautiful (mayhaps he read a bit of the Hojoki in his free time?/lh+j). It's a little sad to see people leave or even die but change is what makes life what it is. Kyoujurou also the second KnY characters I'd want to date so there's that.

1) Inosuke: MY BABY BOAR BOY! From the first panel he was in, he had me entertained. Inosuke is loud and chaotic and fun. I'm not usually about chaotic boys but Inosuke learning what kindness and friendship are are what endear me to him. He's so confused by affection is absolutely the cutest thing. And despite acting macho and like he's supposed to be a leader, all of his major victories are a team effort. Working alongside Tanjirou to beat that puppeted demon on Natagumo Mountain, the fight against Daki, and even in his fight of the final arc. I do kinda wish he had more solo moments though because he should get a little more spotlight, but what he does get, I enjoy thoroughly. He's the character that got me to make a KnY oc (Shizuka) because I wanted someone fiery but also sweet to play off him (and be shipped with him). Inosuke is a feral boy but still a sweet guy and I find that really cute for whatever reason. The bonus chapter about his early life is really stinking adorable as well! It's great! Inosuke is very adoptable in my mind. Thus, he is my favorite character.

[mangorb]

the conversion therapy gaslighting (you're just a stupid little girl/you just feel this way because you were actually secretly raped -- extra confusing as someone who HAS been assaulted)

the invisible man syndrome. one of the oddest things I find is that people will always assume you're a trans woman if they find out you're trans. I'm sure it's because trans women get a lot more media coverage (both positive and negative), but it's just like other trans people don't exist? it's weird lol I choose to find it amusing. it does make looking for community really difficult though

a weird insistence even from professed allies that I need to consider how my transition will affect future partners. Which makes NO fucking sense to me? How and why am I supposed to worry about what a hypothetical future person will think? If this imaginary person wants a partner with boobs/fertility/[insert trait here], idk what to tell you dude, they shouldn't be dating me, straight up. it's not that deep. I'm confident in my ability to pull if I wanted to and I'd much rather do it in a body that I'm attached to.

the absolute information DESERT surrounding ftm bottom. I hold no resentment for transfems getting the bottom surgery they deserve, but the comparative absence of R&D going into transmasc bottom makes me really sad :( Allow me to demonstrate: metiodplasty was a technique developed in the 90s. It has basically never been optimised or improved on since. Extended metoidplasty is rn the closest we can get to a fully functional natal penis, but to my knowledge there are 2 whole surgeons who perform this procedure in the US - and possibly in the world as it isn't approved by the greater medical community. If you add STP ability, you can literally count the number of people who recieved it so far on one hand. Feel free to fact check me here bc I'm on shit internet and cba, but good luck because none of this information can be found on professional, easily accessible websites and is mostly moonshining and word of mouth on fuckin. reddit

I could go on about the ways ftm bottom resources is lacking but this post is getting sidetracked as it is. I feel my phantom dick syndrome very strongly I am sorry. (the response to this is generally "but how do you KNOW that's what you're feeling?" -- see point #1)

really rampant degendering/dehumanising that's only more obvious when coupled with racism. I'm asian, and besides the tendency for people to assume asian = white-adjacent (not for me, I'm dark skinned, don't come from a western culture, speak distinctly with an asian mannerism), even cis asian men are consistently degendered and emasculated, so I've fully made peace that no matter how well I could pass, I'll never actually pass in the world because of my ethnicity. I'm proud of my culture so it doesn't bother me but, like yeah it still sucks terribly

this got too long to keep in the tags whoops

❗️❗️ This is asked entirely in good faith. This post is intended to open dialogue and help with solidarity and understanding. ❗️❗️

I would like to hear specifically from trans men and trans mascs how the system of [whatever the fuck you call the intersection of transphobia, misogyny, and specifically your gender- whether transandrophobia, isomisogny, antitransmasculinity, transandromisia, transmisandry, or any that I have missed as there are a lot of words to describe similar concepts] uniquely targets and affects you. Things that you feel other demographics do not experience. Reblogs and replies are very encouraged! If you would prefer, you could dm or send an ask to be added anonymously by me.

This is in the spirit of wanting to understand. I am listening. I encourage all non-trans-mascs to not speak on this topic and let trans mascs and trans men do the talking here. Reblog the post to spread it, but please say nothing.

Any and all people who identify as trans men and/or trans mascs are encouraged to participate.

This is not bait to start a fight. I will block without hesitation anyone who is actively being a shithead on this post. I want to hear and uplift your voices by getting it directly from you.

Click this to access the trans fem and trans women version of this post.

[lesterlatte]

Since @umi-midorii tagged me in two things I’ll do them in one post lol

I don’t know if anyone would be annoyed by me tagging them??? Feel free to completely ignore me if so (tagging people makes me kinda anxious tbh so askldlsd i’m sorry if you don’t like getting tagged in stuff like this) @ramune-ray @up-the-tube @youngbloodthekilljoy and @henry-hart

This gets kinda long so I’m sorry in advance

I. Nickname?

Lou

II. Gender?

Female

III. Star sign?

Saggitarius

IV. Height?

5′6 ish??? Idk man

V. Favourite feature?

My hair

VI. Favourite colour?

Blue

VII. Favourite animal?

I don’t have one but I love Cats, Alpacas and Sloths the most (also Axolotls are adorable)

VIII. Average hours spent sleeping?

On school night I get 7 hours on weekends it can go from 12 hours one night to like 4 the next i’m a mess

IX. Dogs or cats?

Cats 100%

X. Number of blankets you sleep with?

One

XI. What’s your dream trip?

Definitely Japan though I’d love to go to the USA one day! (not sure which state tbh)

XIV. How many followers do you have?

63

XV. How many pets do you have?

I have one cat - his name is Barney and I love him

XVI. Best places to visit in your town or country?

I mean London and Brighton are probably the two best places to go tbh (where I live in the UK doesn't have that much to visit apart from old buildings lmao)

XVII. Favorite ice cream flavor?

Chocolate or Vanilla (I’m so basic lolol)

XVIII. How often do you read?

I’m very much a fanfic reader and I’ll spend ages reading them if they are presented to me but I’m not a massive physical book reader (though the series a court of thorns and roses is the shit and I highly reccomend it!)

XIX. Favourite study locations?

I just study by the family computer or on my bed (this is a callout bc I should be studying German rn shhh)

XX. Favourite book series?

Okay I already answered that (look back up at question XVIII)

Now for the second lot of questions (these are the ones that the people tagged do not have to answer btw if any of you actually decide to answer any lol)

1. Favourite band/music group?

Right now Tsubaki Factory are my #1 (tbh all of Hello Project are my faves so lets go with that lol) but if I had to choose from music in english? I’d say Panic! at the disco are my fave right now!

2. Favourite subject in school?

Art probably (I also like the music course i’m taking too)

3. Fruits or veggies?

I’m down for both tbh I cant choose lol

4. What’s an inside joke you have?

I don’t really have any?? I guess the fact that myself and @zirith call each other m9 (which is super lame and cringy but so are we whoops)

5. Ever been to disney?

Never but I really really want to go though! (the one in Paris would be my best shot but I’d also love to go to the Florida one too at some point!)

6. Do you like rollercoasters?

Nope count me out of that shit

7. Favourite movie?

Ohhh um The Nightmare Before Christmas is one of my all time faves! I can’t think of any others right now

8. What’s your dream job?

I’m really not sure... I’ve never really thought about it so...

9. What’s something you wish you were good at?

Talking to new people. I’m sososo terrible at it (especially in person) so I wish I could do that

10. What do you listen to during long car rides? (podcasts, specific kind of music, etc.)

I normally have a H!P playlist I go through on long journeys. I add all the newest songs just before I leave and just let them play! (I do find myself with the Super Mario Galaxy ost playing sometimes because its beautiful - its even playing right now haha)

11. Favourite warm drink?

I don’t drink any type of warm drinks sorry lol

Now I’m meant to come up with 10 new questions for the second part or smthn apparently? so here we go:

1) Favourite video game? (if you play any)

2) What is one album you’d recommend?

3) What type of weather do you like most?

4) What mood are you currently in?

5) Favourite comfort food?

6) What is one of your main hobbies?

7) Your opinion on the pineapple on pizza discourse (i’m running out of questions as you can quite clearly tell)

8) Someone you really look up to (can be anyone!)

9) A joke that makes you laugh

10) How was / is your day today? 

[kittyymew]

Dating Dad! Toji- Part 3

First Christmas at the Fushiguro residence

Tagging- @laudthingcat @chosos-angel @tequchiha @tojisfangs

I was planning to hold this idea off until December but this was way too cute and I am an impatient and a horney person when it comes to Daddy Toji!

Link to Previous Parts- Part 1. Part 2.

Link to the Next Parts- Part 4. Part 5.

*******

Toji isn't big on festivals or occasions. That is before he had you and Baby 'Gumi in his life. He isn't as excited for Christmas as much as he is to spend it with the only two important people in his life.

"Do we HAVE to? Can't we just... order it online or something?!" He'd complain when you tell him that you have to go out shopping for a Christmas Tree. He already hated shopping as it is, and now to go out and look for... trees? He'd be bored out of his mind just by the thought of it.

"Why can't we buy a plastic tree? Wouldn't it be more... I don't know... economical?" Toji would suggest as you're strolling down the aisles at one of your local dealers.

"ABSOLUTELY NOT!" You whisper scold him, continuing to push the stroller in which Baby 'Gumi is fast asleep.

If you think Toji wouldn't start with his shenanigans while you're out shopping for a Christmas tree, then you're dead wrong. 30 minutes in and he's going to start spewing out lewd comments, occasionally grabbing/ smacking your ass telling you how he cannot wait until you get home and get punished for dragging him through this boring festival task.

Yeah he doesn't care if his behaviour receives a few judgemental glances from other customers. In fact, he enjoys seeing you get all flustered and embarrassed.

Your ass and his imagination are the only things keeping him sane as of now.

A few days later, you have your Christmas tree set in the living room. But, thanks to Toji, he managed to set the tree on fire. No it wasn't Jogo.

You'd come home to see that your Tree has disappeared along with Toji and Baby 'Gumi. You're gonna whoop his ass when he comes home. He has a lot of explaining to do. Yeah to think that this sorcerer assassin is scared of YOU is kinda funny.

Around midnight, he's gonna sneak into the house, thinking that you might be asleep but there you are, on the couch waiting for him to get home.

"OH Babe! I thought you'd be asleep! I just uh... went out because 'Gumi wanted to go out, you know!"

You'll just raise an eyebrow at which point he'd start throwing compliments your way left and right.

"Oh you know, it struck me how amazing you are! And your ability to contain your anger and stay calm is one of your best qualities that I admire! You know I love you right?" well they aren't just empty words though.

You'll cross your arms over your chest, glaring at him. Defeated, he'll tell you the truth about how he saw a cursed spirit in the house hovering near Baby 'Gumi and how he happened to be near the Christmas Tree when he freaked out and tried to get rid of it.

Need I say you went from being mad to being scared and worried in 0.0001 seconds?

"Are you SURE that both of you are O-FUCKING-KAY?" You ask for the millionth time, holding and cuddling Baby 'Gumi close to you. "Oh my god, yes Y/N! Besides, I was the one who went up against it! How is it fair that only 'Gumi is getting all your love and attention?!" Can you believe this man?!

The next day, just when Toji walks out of your shared bedroom in the morning thinking he is out of the woods with having destroyed the Christmas tree, he sees you dressing up Baby 'Gumi in a star costume?

Saying that this man is confused would be an understatement. "Is this supposed to imply that he's the star of our life or some corny shit like that?"

"Toji! Shut up and go get dressed! I'm GETTING a picture of our first Christmas together... WITH a Christmas Tree..."

Yeah he's even more confused now. You shove a bag in his chest and he is DISMAYED by what he finds inside the paper bag.

"I am NOT wearing that Y/N"

Yeah no shit Sherlock. But you're you, you're not taking a NO for an answer this time, and after an hour of persuading and blackmailing and guilt tripping Toji, he finally gets into the stupid thing you bought for him and Baby 'Gumi.

Lord save you when 'Gumi grows up and sees what all shit you've put his baby ass into

So what if you didn't have an actual tree? You now have Toji dressed as a tree!

First Christmas together? Yeah, I think it's a success. Even without an actual Christmas Tree.

"Don't you fucking dare show it to ANYONE Y/N! I am being DEAD-SERIOUS! Or better yet, just delete that picture already!"

Yeah, you're definitely making a card out of it!

*******

Lmfao I don't even know what to say, feels like I'm on meth or something.

Anyhow, I hope you liked it

[bnha-dumpster]

Hear me out

Step-brother Shigaraki shoving a vibe in (male) reader during a dinner and Shigaraki is controlling the vibrator and then after dinner Shigaraki fucks the life out of Reader

i was gonna work on monster stuff but this is just *chef's kiss* i think i'm going down the road of a pseudo-incest kink whoops and laughs at myself as i add plot for no reason (also gives you guys a visual reference of the toy in the fic)

pairing: step-brother shigaraki x male reader content tags/warnings: dub-con, pseudo-incest, mild exhibitionism, choking, sex toys, degradation, mind break word count: 2.1k

Things around the household have changed drastically since your mother remarried. You love your mother and want her to be happy, but you feel that things have changed far too fast and far too much.

You had been told that your step-father wanted you to move in with him for two reasons. One; you don't have a job since you're attending university full-time and two; his house is pretty close to your university. You've seen his house from the outside and you can't deny the thought of living in such a large house is pleasant. It's a good deal. But if you had been told that your step-father has a shut-in son that lives with him before moving in, you might've reconsidered it.

Shigaraki is rude and has zero social skills. While you don't actually mind people that don't have social skills- it's often times not their fault- there's something about your step-brother that just unnerves you. You see him and alarm bells go off in your mind.

He likes to catch you off guard. Coming into your room to watch you, pinning you to surfaces, groping you, watching you shower- there's something really wrong with him.

"Tomu-"

You're trying to walk downstairs to go eat dinner with your mother and step-father. Trying, being the keyword. Shigaraki has you pinned to the wall once again. One of his hands is able to completely hold both your wrists- he's not even that much bigger than you! He's using his free hand to tug your sweatpants down to your knees. The pinning isn't exactly new, but he's never actually pulled your clothes off.

"I bought something for you. It's a little present for having such a cute brother." His voice makes you shudder, but the item he holds up next to your face makes you tense up. It's a brand new, probably expensive, sex toy.

"Tomura- hey- let's not-" You squirm and shake your head.

"Don't cause a fuss. Just let me do this, 'kay?"

The lube on the toy is your only saving grace as he nudges your legs apart with his knee and tries to put it on you. It doesn't work very well, the lubed up toy sliding against your limp cock a few times before Shigaraki growls lowly.

"I'm taking my hand off and I expect you to stay still." True to his word, the hand on your wrists disappears. If this were the first time he tried to do something like this, then you might've run away. But you've unfortunately learned through experience that your step-brother is far stronger than he seems. It's only because of your knowledge do you stay.

His hand is cold and calloused, an uncomfortable feeling against your skin. You grimace as he grabs your cock to slip the ring over it, making sure it’s snug against the base before he pushes the vibrating part of the toy into you. It doesn’t actually seem that bad until he turns the toy on. 

“Shit-” You’re not oblivious to the toy’s function but you didn’t expect it to be so snug against that spot inside you. Shigaraki grabs you before your legs buckle, laughing at your state. 

“Wow, you’re that sensitive?” He’s taunting you, making fun of you. “Is my little brother just a slut in disguise?” 

Your pants are pulled up and a small slap is given to your ass. It brings a small yelp out of you, making you turn around to glare at him. He doesn’t seemed fazed by it. Instead, it spurs him on and you can feel him grind against your ass. Even through the fabric of both of your sweatpants, you can feel how hot and heavy his cock is. You can tell it’s thick and that’s barely hard. 

A sliver of arousal makes itself known with a twitch of your cock. The realization makes you stand up straight and shove your step-brother away, adjusting your clothes to hide the erection beginning to strain underneath your pants. 

It’s difficult to sit down at the dinner table and act normal. You give your mother a small smile as you squirm in your seat for a moment. The toy’s low vibration stimulating every part of you- the base of your cock being teased, vibrations going through your balls and taint, the dildo pressing snugly against your prostate- and it’s difficult to hold your composure. 

“Are you okay, dear?” Your mother is looking at you with concern.

“O-oh, I’m alright, mom.” You force another smile.

“Go lay down after dinner, okay?” 

You give a small nod before you start eating, not waiting for your step-brother to sit down. He’s probably snickering to himself and thinking of what he should do. The sudden increase of vibrations of the toy surprises you and you choke on a piece of food. 

“Honey?” 

“Don’t worry, he’s just a little out of it, right lil bro?” A large hand comes to rest on your shoulder. As you turn to look over your shoulder, Shigaraki stares down at you with a small smirk. You can see the small remote in his hand and you almost want to reach out and grab it. But that’d cause a scene- the last thing you want at the dinner table.

He slides into his seat, not bothering to eat. All he’s doing is staring at you and analyzing your reactions as he plays with the remote in his pocket. 

“Yeah, j-just a little bit out of it.” You try your best to keep yourself together. Eating your dinner as fast as possible is your goal, hoping that this torture is only for the sake of humiliating you in front of your mother. 

The vibrations of the toy change rapidly. It seems like Shigaraki’s just cycling through them for the first time, gauging your reactions as he does so. He’s trying to find the best setting for you right now, surely. The one that does you in is the low and slow pulsing of the toy. 

He’s learning so much about you. You’re smart enough not to fight him physically but still have the guts to snap at him with your words. You prefer to be teased with a lack of stimulation rather than overstimulation. You won’t tell your mother about anything he does so she’ll stay happy. The best part... You’re easy to read.

Now that it’s been a few minutes of dealing with the toy, you’re settling down. It’s still uncomfortable, the low stimulation keeping your cock hard, but you’re able to eat your dinner for the most part. You’re eating quicker than normal just so this can end. 

“Thanks for dinner, mom.” As you stand from the table, Shigaraki cycles through the toy quickly to put the vibrations at its most intense setting. You curl in on yourself and groan, facing contorting. 

“Dear?” 

You give her a reassuring smile despite the heat pooling in your stomach. As much as you want to leave the table, you’re not sure you can do it yourself. It seems to be part of your step-brother’s plan. He puts his arm under yours, holding you up to help you shuffle back upstairs.

“I’ll make sure he’s alright, don’t worry.” 

They can’t see it, but you’re glaring at him as he helps you up. With him being the only reason you’re still standing however, that’s all you can manage to do. You hold onto his torso as he takes you up the stairs and opens the door of your room. 

“You’re close, huh? You were about to cum in front of our parents, weren’t you?” Shigaraki throws you onto the floor of your room with a thud, using his foot to turn you onto your back. He stares down at you and steps on your cock, moving it back and forth. 

“Alright little bro, cum for me.” 

With a particularly large amount of pressure, almost painful, you tense and spurt ropes of cum inside your pants. A stain begins to seep into the fabric and Shigaraki looks down at you with a sneer. You’re squirming under his foot, the toy still vibrating aggressively inside you and around the base of your cock. 

He picks you up by the hair and drags you to your bed, manhandling you so your face is against the comforter and your ass is in the air. He doesn’t even bother turning the toy off as he takes it out of you and slides your cock out of the ring. Your ass clenches around the air pathetically, teasing Shigaraki. Even with something inside you, stretching you out, your ass still looks tight and almost untouched. The only thing eluding to its use is the lube smeared around it. 

You’re given no warning when your step-brother grabs your hips and slams his cock inside you. When did he take it out? You don’t know.

“Shiiiiiit- Do you know how tight you are?” He doesn’t give you a chance to respond. Shigaraki begins to fuck you with abandon, thrusting into you with no care for your comfort. The stretch of his cock, how it reaches almost too deep inside you- it’s horribly uncomfortable. There’s a tinge of pleasure from the stretch of his cock pressing against your prostate almost constantly, but not much else. 

His balls slap against your ass with every heavy thrust and the grip on your hips is bruising. You can feel his nails digging into the skin and you’re sure they’ll leave marks. He’s leaving reminders of this.

A hand leaves your hip to hold your limp cock, pumping it aggressively. The sudden stimulation is painful and you squirm. 

“Now, now, little bro. Be a good slut for me and let me play with you.” Shigaraki sneers at the way you stop squirming at his words. “There... See, you’re a pathetic little slut for your big bro, aren’t you?” 

You refuse to answer, only burying your face into the sheets to hide your humiliated tears. It’s not like it matters. He continues to pump your cock at a fast pace, enjoying the way your walls twitch and tighten because of it. Even if you’re not feeling anything, he is. Your pleasure is more of an afterthought, a bonus. Then your cock begins to twitch back to life. 

“Seriously? You’re feeling good?” Shigaraki leans against you, biting your ear. “Getting off from your step bro treating you like a whore and fucking you? You really must be one if you like this.”

“I’m not!” You protest, turning to look at him. Tears are falling down your face, cheeks red from the embarrassment. “It’s your fault! You’re forcing my body to feel like this!”

Both of you know it’s a lie. You’re definitely enjoying it. As cute as your denial is to your step-brother, he isn’t in the mood for you being like this the whole time. He wants to have to shut you up so your parents won’t hear you begging for his cock. 

With a bit of reluctance, he pulls out of you. You’re allowed a brief moment of confusion as he decides how he wants to position you. Once he decides, he flips you onto your back and hikes your legs over his shoulders. In this position, he rubs your cocks together. His is undeniably thicker than yours, but your length isn’t too drastically different. There’s only a few seconds of rutting them together before he lines his cock up with your ass and slams back in.

Much to his surprise and amusement, you let out a confused moan. The new position must feel good. Your face contorting into pleasure with a mix of self-disgust is beautiful to him.

“Little bro, come on. Just let yourself feel good.” His thrusts slow and he reaches for your neck. The grip on your throat is intense and you can feel yourself becoming lightheaded almost instantly. It’s an intense feeling that mixes with pleasure, clouding your senses. 

Maybe it’s the lack of oxygen or just you giving up, but you begin to buck your hips against Shigaraki’s. Your jaw goes slack and your mouth is open, eyes rolling back into your head. The choking keeps you from making much noise so all you can let out are strangled groans. 

“Finally. Let yourself go. Become my whore, my pathetic cumdump of a little brother. Just be my personal cock sleeve, yeah?” 

The words go in one ear and out the other and you let out a string of agreements. Your back arches, cock twitching and covering your stomach in your own cum. It’s the sudden tightness around him that pushes Shigaraki over the edge. He stills inside you as deep as he can and cums, filling your ass. As he comes down from his high, he lets go of your throat. 

“Good boy.” He smacks your face gently and chuckles at your lack of response. “Gone already? Come on, we’ve barely started.”

[kageyuji]

accidentally grabbing his crush’s ass

⤷ kuroo, bokuto, iwaizumi, akaashi, kageyama ; gn!reader

tags: the title of these hcs lol, vague sexual innuendos(?), kuroo’s is kind of friends to ass-grabbing if you squint

notes: i did hcs like this a while back if these feel familiar, plagiarism isn’t sexy <3 although reblogs are highly appreciated

━━ KUROO

kenma was not a good wingman. at all.

but he tried his best </3

which was why he had invited both you and kuroo to hang out with him, the three of you were friends after all

kenma had planned on “accidentally” locking you two in a room together

what kenma hadn’t planned on was kuroo embarrassing himself before kenma even had the chance to put his plan in action

kuroo was crouched on the floor trying to fix kenma’s gaming system (god knows why it chose today to eat the game card)

he was completely unaware you were standing behind him and, somehow, in his peripheral he had assumed you were kenma’s desk chair

reaching behind himself to grab the chair and pull it over so he could sit in it, his eyes and one hand were still occupied

the other hand was now on your ass

it doesn’t register in his mind at first, he just knows that whatever he’s grabbing it isn’t the chair he thought

he literally turns his head slowly and when he looks at you hes like 😃

“ahah whoops”

“i’m so sorry, i was reaching for the chair”

“kuroo your hand is still on my ass”

he takes his hand away and then apologizes again but there is no hope for him, not when he is red to the tips of his ears

not to mention kenma, who is snickering a few feet away from the cataclysm that just unfolded infront of him

━━ BOKUTO

bokuto koutarou: king of not paying attention to what he is doing

especially not around you, he’s so focused on being perfect to impress you that he often ends up ignoring the minor things — the things that make you realize just how clumsy but sweet he actually is

you’d went to watch him at practice, who were you to turn him down when he said you were welcome to come?

plus, the entire team knew about his crush (it was hard not to with how much he talked about you) and they wanted to meet the person who always made their captain so starstuck and giddy

his eyes were focused on the volleyball court; he couldn’t look at you, he was putting on a serious act in hopes that you’d like him

that’s why when he reached behind himself for a volleyball he accidentally grabbed your ass

immediately realizes what he’s done, turns around and starts apologizing

he gets all pouty as well. he thinks you won’t like him now, even worse he thinks he’s offended you and now you hate him

“i didn’t mean- y/n, i swear i was grabbing a ball, i would never- :(((“

please tell him it’s ok he looks so sad

━━ IWAIZUMI

hajime iwaizumi: king of not paying attention to what he’s doing part 2

it’s not that he’s inherently oblivious to everything, he just. notices what needs to be noticed and passes over everything else

but he hadn’t heard you walk into the gym, hadn’t seen you sit on the bench in front of him when he knelt down beside his gym bag

oikawa knew you were there, so of course he smiled and loudly called “iwa-chan!”

iwaizumi, of course, went to stand up and grabbed at the bench to help himself

the bench he didn’t realize you were sitting on

so when he grabbed your waist, he also was pulling you to him. unintentionally, of course, but he was doing it nonetheless

which ended up with you falling (or rather, being dragged) off the bench and into iwa’s lap

both of you have to take a moment to process what just happened

eventually you both come to the realization that you’re sitting between his legs with his hands still somewhat on your hips and somewhat on your ass

he doesn’t want to push you off of him, but you’re currently still trying to process the situation and not moving

so he takes his hands from under your ass and slips away from behind you

“i uhm... i’m sorry, y/n. i didn’t see you, i thought i was grabbing the bench-”

“it’s alright iwa! accidents happen.”

he’ll never admit that he’s blushing. oikawa, makki, and mattsun laughing does not help the red tint in his cheeks though

━━ AKAASHI

bless his heart omg,,,, anyways SHDBSJDB

bokuto is a good wing man!! or at least he thinks he is 😀

but he had successfully talked you into coming to practice with him and akaashi

there wasn’t much convincing to do though, considering you had had a crush on akaashi for ages and would jump at any opportunity to be around him

but nevertheless, akaashi was setting for bokuto as always. the bin of volleyballs he always had was right beside him

...except it was on the opposite side he was used to, being that bokuto had insisted it be moved so you could stand near akaashi

he reached behind himself for a ball, but accidentally grabbing your ass instead

he realizes his mistake as soon as hes made it

even though he takes his hand back and is already stumbling out an apology, he has to turn and look at you because oh my god he did not just do that,,, oh no he did

eventually he manages to sting enough words together that it sounds something like an apology — he is sorry, he’s just far too embarrassed by what just happened to form a proper sentence

“it’s ok! don’t worry, things happen. i know you didn’t mean it” and suddenly akaashi knows that hes in deep

“uhm- yeah, sorry again. maybe you can just hand me the balls from now on ok?”

━━ KAGEYAMA

either kageyama was going to kill hinata or hinata was going to kill him, he didn’t mind which came first

hinata had invited both of you to a restaurant with him, and then ditched just as soon as you and kageyama had both arrived

of course, to you it was just bad timing. to kageyama however, he knew this was hinata’s attempt to get you to closer

kageyama tobio, who had no clue how to talk to his crush, was going to sit in a restaurant alone with you

much to his surprise though, he found himself enjoying your company. you were much kinder and easier to talk to than he had imagined in his mind, that much was clear

but of course he had to mess up. and of course it was in the most (though unintentional) perverted way

he reached to hold the door open for the people behind you whenever you were leaving but had miscalculated where you were walking

meaning he had his hand rested on your ass instead of the door

he jerks his hand back like a man scalded almost as soon as it happens

he’s stuttering and mumbling out an apology as well. it’s barely coherent, but you were laughing too hard anyways

please stop laughing he wants nothing more than to crawl into a hole and never have to face you again

“kags! it’s ok, seriously. it’s more funny than weird i promise. take me out again and we’ll call it even, alright?”

kageyama.exe has stopped working

© kageyuji 2021. do not copy, modify, or otherwise plagiarize in any way.

[ijustwant2write]

Reconnect-Finn Shelby x Reader

(GIF credit to @peakystitches​)

Masterlist

Tags: @captivatedbycillianmurphy​ @jenepleurepasbaby​ @amirahiddleston​ @bloodorangemoonlight @haphazardhufflepuff​ @mzcrazy2​

Requested by anonymous: ‘Hello! May i request an either tommy or finn shelby x reader? (Whicheverr one u think suits best) for this prompt i found: character A and B have been in a longterm relationship and nothing can get in between, until one day something does and they drift away. But then they reconnect emotionally and everything feels like the first time again (first kiss, first meal together etc) 🙏🏼💜 i love ur writing thank u’

Characters: Finn Shelby x Reader, Polly Gray x Reader (platonic)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

Warnings: Swearing, arguing, finance issues, drinking, fluff

                                    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Finn, is that you?" I called out from our bedroom as I heard the front door open. I tensed up when I didn't hear a reply, only to let out a sigh when I heard him giggling.

He was drunk again, it happened almost every week now. Tommy would have given him something important to do for the gang, and whether or not Finn succeeded with that task, he would go out and celebrate with his mates. I would sometimes tag along if I wasn't tired from the week of working, but after seeing our finances, I realised we needed to stop acting like teenagers and start saving wisely.

"Hello my gorgeous girl." he slurred out as he entered the room.

"Hello Finn." I replied as I received a sloppy kiss to my forehead.

He flopped down beside me in bed, taking the book out of my hands and throwing it to the floor. Finn wrapped his arms around me, snuggling into my lap. I took off his hat, stroking back his hair. He was cold from the brisk walk home, causing me to shiver.

“You should have come out tonight." he said.

"I got off work late."

"He kept you again?"

"No, I decided to stay."

"Why? You always say you're tired."

"I'm tired because I'm picking up extra shifts and hours so that we can start saving up for a house."

"I've told you, we don't need to worry about that. Business is good."

"Finn, we're not going to be given the money. We have to earn it."

"Tommy will help us."

"He might help but he won't give us a lot. And even if he did hand us a house, we've got to have enough money for the bills, furniture-"

"It will be fine."

"Finn, we've not even had our wedding yet!"

We had been engaged for half a year. We were wanting to be married sooner, but problems arose with the Peaky Blinders it distracted us both from it, especially since our lives were in danger. I desperately wanted to have enough money for the wedding and house, though it looked like it was going to be one or the other at this point.

"What's wrong with the flat?" Finn now sat up.

"Did you seriously ask me that question? There's only so much I can do to this dump to make it look somewhat liveable. It just doesn't feel like home."

"We'll get the money. Don't worry. Look, look," he took my hands in his,"we will get a house. I promise. And believe me, I want to marry you as soon as I can, there needs to be another ring on that finger. And I need to see my name at the end of yours."

I stupidly believed him. Those adoring eyes I once trusted had lied to me. Finn kept his promise for a week at max, soon breaking it. I didn't mind him going out with friends, we both needed to socialise, I just disagreed with the amount of times he was out and the amount of drinks he was buying each night. He would always offer to get the next round, and although he was a Shelby, the discounts didn't make much difference at the end of the night. I decided I had to go with him to ensure that our money wasn't being poured away, struggling to stay awake for those long nights, and making work even harder every day. It was impossible to keep an eye on him like that.

Usually Finn would tell me if he was going out that night so I wouldn't worry. That stopped too. My mind was never at ease. How did I know he wasn't lying in a ditch somewhere after a job gone wrong? Or what if he was trapped somewhere by a rival gang? I could only rest when he returned, which he always luckily did. I pretended to be asleep, trying to not push him away as he slipped his arms around me, cuddling me for the rest of the night. My patience began to grow thin. I was too scared to speak up about it, worried that we would just end up having an argument. However, I knew we would have to bring it up soon, because our money was only disappearing instead of increasing.

One morning when I was leaving for work, I noticed that the drawer we locked our savings away in was slightly ajar, meaning someone had unlocked it and stupidly left it open. Of course it had to be Finn, no one had broken in during the night. My eyes widened when I saw how much he had taken, enraged that he would think me so foolish. Why would he take the money without asking? What was he using it for?

As I stormed towards the shop, I heard whooping from men in a car further up the street. My face turned into a deep frown when I recognised the car, managing to catch a glimpse of the people in it. They hadn't seen me, and I had to make sure my eyes were deceiving me.

I didn't care about the looks on me as I burst through into the shop, making a beeline for Polly's office. I harshly knocked on the door, entering when she called me.

"(Y/N)? What's wrong?" she asked, a lit cigarette in hand.

"Where's Finn?"

"Off out with his brothers, why?"

"Where are they going?"

"To the races."

I scoffed, placing a hand on my head in defeat.

"Why? What's wrong with that?"

"He told me he would be in the office all day today."

"So? Things change."

"No, he specifically told me that. I never even asked about it. He made a point meaning he didn't want to risk me waltzing in. That means he's hiding something."

"(Y/N), they're only going to bet on horses today. They're mingling."

"They're betting today?!"

She stood, putting a hand on her hip."What am I missing here?"

"Pol, he's using money that we don't have! I need a car, I need to get to him."

"Look, even if my nephew is being the biggest idiot, it's a bad idea to go there."

"Why?"

Her eyes widened."Don't snap at me young lady."

"I'm sorry, I just, I just know he's going to be stupid with what little money we have at the minute."

Polly was silent for a few seconds, and I didn't know if she was just staring me out, trying to make me leave. Perhaps she didn't think it was anything to worry over. But it was to me. She surprised me when she went into one of her drawers, pulling out a set of keys.

"Come on. I'll get one of the girls to call your work, say you're sick."

I tightly clasped my hands together as Polly drove. I was furious, trying to think of what to say to Finn when I got there. He stole our money. He went behind my back, gambling away the money we worked hard to earn. I had never said it, but Finn had it much easier than I did. For one, he worked with family, and although I liked my job, the boss could sometimes be an arsehole; second, he earned a lot more than me, so he was the bigger breadwinner between us, but I worked longer hours. Yes, he was in a gang meaning he had more days where his life was under threat, but he seemed to be having a jolly good time anyway. Really, it wouldn't have mattered who worked longer or harder, or who earned more, it was still our money to spend on our house.

As soon as Polly parked up, I was straight out of the car. She quickly followed grabbing my arm and warning me to not get lost in the crowds. I couldn't make a scene, especially since there could be potential business partners or enemies about. I refrained from rolling my eyes, knowing she was right but also knowing that I would find it extremely hard to not scream at Finn.

Polly guided me to where the men would be, ignoring the shoving and shouting. I wished for her to walk quicker. We swiftly entered the posher boxes, almost stopped by a doorman until his accomplice shut him up. I even heard him whisper 'That's Polly Gray you idiot.', the one time I was glad we had a reputation. She only paused to scan the room for the boys but I spotted them first. Quickly moving past her, I couldn't stop my fists from clenching, seeing Finn joyfully drinking and laughing with his brothers only added fire to my fury.

"Finn!" I snapped, quickly catching his attention.

"(Y/N)?" he exclaimed, struggling to stand and clattering the plates and glasses on the table."W-what are you doing here?"

"Stopping you from spending our money like a fucking idiot! Where is it?"

"Oh, Finn boy is in the doghouse." John chuckled.

"Shut up!" I fiercely pointed at him.

"Where's what?" Finn brought me back.

"Our money!"

"I told you, you do this outside." Polly warned, shoving Finn in that direction, and I knew I had to follow him.

Luckily, we were left alone. Finn continued on, finding someplace we would be alone. Once we were in the clear, the distant roar of the crowds covering our conversation, I saw him sigh quietly, running a hand down his face when he realised what was coming.

"Where's the money Finn?" I asked, calmer but with a mean tone.

"Let me explain first.”

"Explain how you took our money without asking? How you just waltzed out this morning without consulting me?"

"Tommy said that there was a good chance, a very good chance that this horse would win, and I thought it would help us if we put our money on it. Imagine how much we'll have if it wins!"

"If it wins Finn, if! You're gambling our money, why would you do something like that?"

"Because you went on about not having enough money! And here I am trying to help!"

My mouth dropped open in shock."You really don’t see the problem here."

"No, actually, I don't." he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Finn, you stole money from the drawer! You then go behind my back and bet it away. Have you thought about what we'll do if that horse loses?"

"But it won't, Tommy said."

"And what if Tommy is wrong this time? Also, don't pin this on your brother, I know he hasn't even suggested this idea."

"I'm not-urgh!" Finn groaned."Why don't you trust me?"

"I can't trust a gamble Finn. I don't think you realise how many nights I've spent lying awake, worried that we'll never have enough for our own home, and thinking that you don't even care anymore."

"Of course I care. This is why I've bet the money."

"How is this not getting in your head?"

"(Y/N)," he took my hands in his, but I couldn't even look at him,"in a few minutes we will hear them announce the winner, and we will start jumping for joy when we realise how much money we're going to get back, and we're going to be so much closer to getting our home."

"Finn, I desperately want to believe that. But even if we do win, you're in deep trouble." I took my hands away from him, turning around. I couldn't even look at my own fiance.

On queue, we heard a man come over the intercom, it was muffled to me but I knew Finn was listening intensely. Glancing over my shoulder, I watched for his reaction, turning around fully when I saw his expression. We had lost. We lost all that money.

"How could you be so fucking stupid?!" I screamed at him, throwing slaps onto his chest."Why couldn't you just listen to me? I don't understand why you had to lie to me Finn!"

I broke down crying, shoving him away from me. My sobs were loud but I didn't care. Finn could watch, see how much he upset me. My heart sank at the thought of it all gone, Finn had left scarcely any money in the drawer back at the flat.

"I'm sorry (Y/N)." Finn pathetically said.

"You know how you always go on about your family never trusting you enough for the big jobs? That you never get to go out with them and help? This is why. Because you do things like this, you fuck everything up Finn. Fuck!" I wiped away my tears, even though more spilled out."You know I've always stuck beside you, but this is the last straw Finn. I can't be with someone who doesn't want to put effort into their future."

"What are you saying? (Y/N), I can fix this. I promise I'll get the money back, I'll-"

"How? That took us so long to build that up. And you were spending our money almost every night on useless drinking. I can't Finn, I can't live like that anymore."

He ducked his head, and I almost wanted him to say something. When he didn't, I knew what I had to do.

I took a deep breath before speaking."I'm going home. I suggest you stay at Polly's tonight."

"Let me take you home-"

"No!"

"What's going on?" Tommy suddenly appeared, he, his brothers and Polly approaching.

"Your nephew, your brother, just gave away almost all of our money betting on a horse. Not only that, but he took the money without telling me. That was money for a house." I angrily explained.

"Is that true Finn?"

Finn shamefully nodded.

"We can get you your money back (Y/N)."

"It's not about that Tom. He's lied to me. He promised me he wouldn't spend our money every week, yet he did. And then he takes our money without asking me about it first."

"I'll fix it (Y/N), I promise I will." Finn was begging at this point.

"Another promise that you're bound to break. I've had enough today."

"Let's get you home love." Polly said, putting a stop to this argument as she stepped forward, taking me under her arm.

Finn didn't come home that night. I didn't sleep. I was sat at the tiny dining table, staring at the ring on my finger, wondering what to do. It broke my heart to think about leaving him, but it also broke my heart thinking about how reckless he had been. Did I really want to be marrying someone who acted like this? Would he mature? My heart wanted to believe he would, but my mind kept telling me that today confirmed he wouldn't. That was one of the worst nights of my life.

                                     *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I couldn't stand this job any longer. But it was the only thing keeping me alive. It was crappy work, the pay was just above minimum, enough for me to buy food, pay my rent and have the tiniest amount left over. Saving up money was hard when it was just you. Even after two years, I didn't have enough to consider looking at places of my own, or with less roommates. It was exhausting keeping up with these girls I lived with, there were 6 of us altogether. It was a big change when I moved away from Small Heath.

"You ready (Y/N)?" one of my roommates called out to me as I finished applying my lipstick.

"Just a second!" I replied, checking myself in the mirror.

It was the rare occasion that I was going out with them, the one time we could all go out together at all. I was looking forward to a few drinks, and although that sounded hypocritical, I realised that I had to have a night or two in at least a month to relieve myself of the stress I put upon myself.

We arrived at the small club we always went to, it had the cheapest drinks this side of town. We all shivered in the cold weather, walking as fast as we could to make it to the club. The warmth was very welcome, as well as the loud music that drew us further in. It was the usual routine, a few of us grab a table, the others get the drinks in, then we would all make our way to the dance floor. Hours passed, and I had to get away from the heat coming from the dancing, stepping back towards our table to get a drink. I saw my roommate stumbling in the direction of the bar, rolling my eyes as I went to help her, perhaps getting a drink whilst I was there. However, once I got closer, I stared at the man she was starting to flirt with.

"Isaiah?" I said as I got closer.

"(Y/N)!" he smiled, bringing me in for a hug.

"You two know each other?" my roommate asked, looking disappointed.

"He's an old friend. Just that, nothing else."

Isaiah let me go."How long has it been? Two years?"

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, two years. What are you doing here?"

"Business. Nothing dangerous though, you girls are still in for a good night. Especially you if you're good." he winked to my roommate.

"Is he...is he here?" my voice suddenly went shaky, and I felt almost completely sober.

Isaiah's playful nature dropped."Uh, he is. He's really misses you (Y/N). Hasn't even looked at another girl since you left. He's just not been the same." I wasn't sure how to reply.

"I can't not tell him I saw you. Imagine if he found out, he would be so upset with me."

"I know. I wouldn't want to hurt your friendship."

"Maybe you should see him. It might do you both some good."

"Or the opposite."

"He still loves you. Even if you don't feel the same, it could bring closure. But I know you (Y/N), I can tell what you're thinking."

"You were always annoying like that."

"He's out front, in the corridor. That's all I'm going to say."

I looked at him for a few seconds, trying to make my mind up."Well, this one is a handful, just so you know."

"I think I can handle her." Isaiah smirked.

"I was warning her about you."

I giggled at his reaction, walking away and leaving him in his natural habitat of flirting. But as soon as I turned around, my stomach dropped, nerves filling up my entire body. He was here. I hadn't seen him for two years, though I thought about him everyday. Would he look different? Did I look different? What was he going to say? What was I going to say? My brain didn't want to think of any words, maybe I was about to babble absolute nonsense to him.

Upon seeing him, my throat tightened, the cool air slapping me in the face; oh, now I was sober. He hadn't noticed yet, leaning up against a wall, hands in his pockets. Wow, he had changed. His boyish charm was still there, yet he had matured into a handsome young man. It was like I was seeing him for the first time all over again. I was just happy that he would be seeing me in my finer clothes rather than catching me after work.

Urging my feet to move, I almost sighed at how small my steps were. I really was scared. Isaiah had said reassuring things, yet I couldn't even walk up to him. It was too late to back out now, especially when he finally looked up at me. I froze on the spot, not knowing what to do. Finn seemed the same way.

"(Y/N)." he said, I only just heard it.

"Hello."

Hello? Really, that's all I could come up with?

He pushed himself off the wall, coming to stand in front of me, though not too close."I...I can't believe you're here."

"I could say the same about you."

"This is where you've been living then."

I nodded."It's not too bad. I mean, I'm on a night out."

"Who are you with?"

I knew he was wondering if I was with a man."My roommates, I live with five other girls."

"Oh, that's a lot."

"Yeah, it's the only place I could afford."

"I hope it's nice."

"I shouldn't complain. A lot better than other places."

We both knew we were making an awful attempt at small talk. I was sure he had so much to say like I did, we just didn't want to dump it on each other in case the other ran away. It was like we were teenagers again, awkwardly trying to think of something to fill the dreaded silence.

"I really want to talk about us (Y/N)." Finn said.

"You do?"

"I...I just have so much to say to you. I can't do it now, but what about tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow? Tomorrow, um, yes, yes tomorrow works for me. It's the weekend, so I'm not working."

He smiled slightly."OK, good. I'll come get you. Um, I need your address."

"Oh, here." I dug around in my purse, thankful there was a folded up tissue and a pen, it was good to be prepared. I wrote down my address, handing it to him.

"I'll pick you up at one. I would want it to be earlier, you just never know what time you'll be back with this sort of thing."

"I understand Finn, I did live this with you once."

I barely slept, even when we stumbled in at three in the morning. Luckily I hadn't seen Finn, Isaiah or any other Peaky Blinder that evening, no doubt settling business behind the scenes. Despite the lack of sleep, I was wide awake the next morning, up before everyone else who were nursing their hangovers, trying on multiple outfits in a desperate attempt to look nice, but not as if I put too much effort in. The clock was rolling onto one o'clock, and my heart was beating much faster than usual. I was about to make my way downstairs when something glistened on my small vanity. Should I take it? Yes, I would.

Finn knocked on the door, and I waited a few seconds before opening it. We smiled as we greeted each other, not going in for a hug or kiss on the cheek, something I was worried about. That was the first hurdle jumped over.

"How was your evening?" Finn struck up a conversation as we walked further into town.

"Much better than yours I presume?" I smirked. He chuckled."Yeah, didn't exactly get to enjoy the music. Small fight, nothing we couldn't handle."

It was strange hearing about Blinder business again."Well I'm glad you're all safe."

"I thought we could go out for lunch, saw a nice place round here."

"Oh, that would be lovely."

"We don't have to, if you don't feel comfortable."

"No, no, no, it's not that. It's just a lovely thing for you to do."

We both bashfully smiled, luckily the restaurant was just around the corner. I had expected nothing less when we walked into the fancy place, not because I thought I deserved it, but because Finn wouldn't be seen anywhere else. His clothes were even more tailored now than they had been the last I saw him, indicating that the gang had been doing well, more money was coming in. We both immediately picked up our menus as we sat, hoping someone would speak first. Our eyes glanced over the top of them, it was as if we were on our first date again, only this time in a better establishment.

"You look beautiful." he said, still hiding part of his face.

"Thank you." I blushed.

"I'll never forget what you wore when I picked you up for our first date. That blue dress you just bought, with a matching purse, and those heels that you hadn't practiced walking in. Well, you used that as an excuse to latch into my arm all night."

I smiled, placing down my menu."It was a good plan, wasn't it? And I did struggle in those heels, I just didn't want to embarrass myself."

He copied me."I liked holding your hand all night."

"What a sweet sentiment."

"I mean it. And I mean this date. That didn't sound right, but...what I'm trying to say is that I want to make it all up to you."

"You do?"

"Yes! I really didn't expect you to leave. I mean I did, but I didn't want to believe that. I didn't want to believe that I had been so selfish that I couldn't even see how much I had hurt you." 

“That was the hardest decision I ever made. Most days I battle with myself whether I made the right choice. All night I kept making deals with myself. If you came back, I would hear you out, and if it was good enough for me I would stay. But then you didn’t, so I said to myself ‘Give him another hour.’. An hour went by, and I said the same thing to myself. That went on for the whole evening until I found myself angrily packing my things. Even then, I sat by door on top of my suitcase for another hour or so.”

“I thought you just got up and left. I didn’t realise how long you waited for me.” he sighed into his hands.“I’m such a fucking idiot.”

I could tell he was full of regret. Although it sounded sadistic, I was glad that he was upset when reflecting on our past relationship, it meant he realised his mistake. On the other hand, I hated seeing him sad. I took his hands away from his face, hesitantly reaching into my handbag to pull out the engagement ring I kept.

His eyes widened.“You still have that? I looked everywhere for it when you left, guessed you took it to sell.”

“I won’t lie, that was my intention at first. But it meant too much to me. It was like selling a piece of my soul. I kept it hidden, I didn’t want to risk any of the girls seeing it, they would just ask too many questions.”

I kept my eye on the beautiful ring as I spoke, slowly twirling it around to catch it twinkling in the light.

"I had such a hard time picking that out. I knew what you wanted, but I had to get it right for you. I'm so glad you kept it."

"I did try to sell it. I was stood outside of a shop for ten minutes debating with myself. It would have helped a lot for the deposit on the room, but I couldn't do it."

We were silent, both staring at the ring. We used to do that a lot actually. Finn would take my hand and hold it up as we laid in bed together, both giggling as we watched it glisten like it was in present times, before squealing at the thought of us being married to each other. I constantly fiddled with it when he was off on business, a habit which never wore off, even now; whenever I was nervous or worried, I would automatically do the same action, just without the ring.

A waiter awkwardly interrupted us, and I hurriedly put the ring back in my bag, sharing an embarrassed smile with Finn as we ordered. Once he was gone, I quietly sighed, looking out of the window. We were in such a nice part of town, so many ladies in beautiful dresses and men in smart suits strolling around.

"Are you...are you OK for money?" Finn boldly asked.

I was a little shocked by that.

"I don't mean anything by it. I just want to make sure you're OK, I would hate for you to be struggling, if you were."

"Uh, no, no I'm fine actually. It's not as generous as my old wage but it keeps me alive, I can live with the bare necessities."

I could see him itching to say something else, to keep the conversation going. I wasn't sure if we could go back to the serious topic we had before. However, I also wanted to bring it back up, it felt like we needed to talk about us.

"How's the family?" That's all I could come up with.

"They're fine. Everyone is the same. Well, they're not, they're a bit more serious nowadays."

"They weren't in the first place?"

He smiled."I suppose they were. Tension is the right word, tensions have been rising. Tommy's taking on a lot more, Polly knows all these secrets that no one else does, Ada is rebelling against anything Tommy says, Linda is still annoying, Esme and John have been popping kids out left, right and centre. Arthur is still crazy."

"Sounds like business as usual to me."

"They miss you too."

"Do they?"

"Yeah. Almost as much as me."

I cast my eyes down as butterflies rose in my stomach.

"I heard nothing else for the next few weeks after you left. They all told me what an idiot I was, that I was an extremely reckless, stupid and immature boy, and that I had let the best thing in my life get away from me. And they were right. I knew all of that already."

"I...I don't really know what to say right now."

"You don't have to say anything, let's just enjoy this meal, no more of that talk."

The nerves making my stomach flip built at that. What if we had nothing else to talk about? What if it was too weird to dive into our separate lives? I didn't want to sit across my ex-fiance, painfully and politely smiling through forced conversation.

The spark was still there.

When the waiter had returned with our drinks, we were already deep in talk about what had been happening in our personal everyday life. We were non stop, even as we ate through dinner. The waiters had trouble catching our attention each time they checked on us. I was deep in those eyes again, the ones I always dreamed of seeing. We were laughing hysterically, not at all acting how we should have in that establishment (there were a few eye rolls from other patrons). As if time had gone by in a second, the bill was slipped towards Finn, though I still reached into my purse.

"Are you mad? No, put your money away, I'm not taking it." Finn stated as he carelessly threw down some notes, surprisingly taking my hand in his and guiding me out of the restaurant.

I was tense as we walked, and I saw a flash of realisation in Finn's eyes as we made it outside. Both looking down at our interlocked fingers, Finn broke away, clearing his throat.

"Sorry, force of habit."

Hesitating, I smiled up at him, lacing our hands together again."These are new heels I'm breaking in. Need help walking in them."

He chuckled, pulling me closer as we walked down the street. We were silent, feeling like kids in love again. I couldn't deny that my feelings were still strong for Finn, I missed him dearly. At first, part of me had been wary of all this, wondering if he really had good intentions, or just thought he could get a quick shag in from an ex before he left; but the effort he went through, the things we spoke about, trying to heal old wounds, Finn had matured and he was wanting to fix this. I wanted to fix this, my heart was aching for my old life with him. 

“We’re not done yet, are we?” I timidly asked.

“Not unless you want it to be.”

I instantly shook my head.“No, I’d like to stay out for longer.”

“Even though you’re struggling in your heels?”

I smirked.“I know a nice place we can sit down.”

I took him to the local park, it had a huge lake with benches dotted around, luckily it wasn’t busy, there was somehow a hint of privacy here. We sat down close to each other, hands still entwined. 

“You still hungry?” I asked.

“Hm?”

I dug into my purse, producing a bag of sweets I had bought the previous day. I laughed as his eyes lit up, taking one without even asking. I took one too, reminiscing on how we used to do the same thing as kids. It seemed he was thinking about it too.

“Just like the old days.” Finn said.

“We spent way too much money on sweets back then. It’s a wonder we still have our teeth.”

 “Wish I got out of that spending habit. We could be married and in our new house by now.”

“So you never wanted to move on? You didn’t give in to those girls wanting to be with a Peaky Blinder?”

“Never. I couldn’t. I couldn’t even fathom being with anyone else, it was always you (Y/N). Did you date?”

“No, I felt exactly the same. Which is why I was angry at myself for a long time. I was supposed to be upset with you, not still in love.”

His head whipped round to face me.“You still love me?”

My mouth was still open, unsure how to answer. It seemed I didn’t have to as Finn leaned in, placing on hand on my cheek as we kissed. Instinctively I kissed back, placing my hands on him where I could, hearing the bag of sweets fall to the ground and spill its contents. This kiss was needy, the type of kiss you gave your partner when you had missed them, when they had been away for a long time; and although we had our hands on each other, our touch was still gentle.

“Get the ring.” Finn breathed out, our lips still almost touching.

I carelessly got it for him, heart beating extremely fast. He took it from me, pecking me on the lips one last time before standing up. He straightened out his suit, took a deep breath and got down on one knee. I was just as emotional the first time he did it.

“(Y/N), I know I messed up everything in the past, I was careless when I should have been supportive and helped to build our future. I learnt from those mistakes, and I really, really want to go back to how we were. I need you (Y/N), I love you so much. There aren’t enough words to express how much love I have for you. Will you marry me?”

I didn’t need to think about my answer. I blurted out a yes, waiting for him to slide the ring back on my finger before throwing myself onto him. We stumbled back onto the ground, our arms around each other as we laughed and cried. I believed him this time, I truly believed him. He put in the effort to show me his changes, he wanted to fix everything. I wanted things back to the way they were with my man, and we were back to building our future and living the rest of our lives together.

[llyncooljones]

as we watch planes takeoff - rowaelin month day one.

ao3 || masterlist || rowaelin month '22 masterlist 

prompt: songfic. based on cop car by sam hunt.

word count: 2319

trigger warnings: language, police presence.

tag list: @rowaelinscourt @live-the-fangirl-life  @rowaelinismyotp  @rowanaelin  @fireheartwhitethorn4ever  @elentiyawhitethorn  @autumnbabylon @leiawritesstories

 

on the road, just before dusk.

Aelin Ashryver Galathynius knew one thing. She was immediately obsessed and addicted to the feeling of Rowan Whitehorn’s hand on her bare thigh. She loved the thick fingers, the wide knuckles, and the grip they had on her. She loved the faint green and blue of his veins she could spot through the skin of his hand. She also loved the way those veins twined up and around his forearms.

She just fucking loved his arms, his wrists, his hands, his fingers.

She especially loved all those things he could do with his fingers. To her very own body.

But here they were, his fingers gripping her thigh which was closest to the centre console, the windows down and her hair flicking this way and that in the wind, his sunglasses pulled down over those pretty, pretty eyes of his as they drove toward the sunset.

A giddy giggle escaped her, finger flying up to her face to catch it, simultaneously pulling the strands that have crisscrossed over her face away. She couldn’t believe it, couldn’t quite contain herself. She reigned in the urge to let out a ‘whoop’, whilst tossing her hair around in the wind.

The sun was a blazing ball, cocooned by the tarmac, the trees, and the clouds, and the glow of the just-emerging moon. Her mind jumped from thing to thing, her skin hypersensitive, her senses over-aware of where Rowan was sitting.

Where he was sat, looking far too relaxed, far too cool, driving with one hand on the wheel.

Because, of course, his other arm was bent at an awkward angle to keep his hand on her thigh. A low, thudding base drifted through the car, her fingers tapped against one another in time, whilst Rowan’s did so against the steering wheel.

As they veered left, she slid her sunglasses to the top of her head, twisting her body so she could face Rowan, so she could see where they were turning into. Along barbed-wire-topped, metal chain link fences sat many impossible-to-ignore ‘NO TRESPASSING’ signs, but they navigated past them and into the field without a pause.

“I can feel your excitement from here, Ace. You look gorgeous with that mischief in your eyes.” His voice was deep, washing over her in waves that sent shivers down her spine, and heat through her core.

“Don’t you sweet talk me, Whitehorn. Don’t you dare. I am breaking the law so that we can wish upon planes taking off. I am risking the very foundation of my relationship with my parents to do this, so don’t. You. Dare.” The last few words fell out on a snarl, her eyes narrowed dramatically while her lips twitched playfully.

She jumped, nearly from her fucking skin, when a fingertip slid down her jawline, before dragging down the soft, pliable flesh of her neck. “What’s that crazy head’a yours thinking about now, honey? It better be about how damn good I look in this shirt–it is, after all, the one you love so much.”

A dazzling smile filled her field of vision, all braces-straightened teeth and slightly cracked teenaged lips. A flash of minty breath passed over her before she releases a breathy sigh, followed by a breathless, “Do tell me, kind sir, why is it that you’re wearing the shirt, I simply cannot stop wonderin’?” The southern twang she’d always felt was too strong, was in fact far too weak, when compared to the full-bodied accent Rowan had, complete a vocabulary of phrases no one had heard since cowboys in the ‘50s.

“For all the right reasons, don’t worry that head, miss Galathynius.” She loved the teasing in his voice, loved it so.

The rumble of Rowan’s ancient truck had quietened, only the chirping of crickets, and the bird song to keep them company. Her eyes darted from window to window, trying to take in as much as she could.

Parked in an abandoned field, now owned by the airport next to it, they were alone. The air in the cab of the truck was calm, the two of them sat still, just taking it all in. The views and the sounds; the realities and the risks of what they were doing.

Aelin had always wanted to come here, she had begged and pleaded as a child, as a preteen (she was so desperate that even as an awkward preteen she wanted to be here) to be brought here. But she had always been turned down. Always been denied the absolute pleasure she knew she would find here.

But here she and Rowan were, on their fifteenth date in three months, breaking the law already. She had some inkling that this date would end up being the one to set the precedent for their entire relationship and some. She let her head rock back to lean against the leather, whilst still looking at the joyous person who was her boyfriend.

It felt crazy to say, that she, Aelin Ashryver Galathynius, had a fucking boyfriend. But godsdamn, did she have the best one. The kind of boyfriend who would risk jail time for her, who would risk everything just to fulfil a wish she’s had since she was five.

Dusk had rolled in quickly, the colours of the clouds changing constantly. She relished watching the colours stroll on by, enraptured by the sheer power the sun could capture, the light walking across the impossible expanse of sky she’d looked up at every day.

“Excited?” questioned Rowan, his thumb stroking across her thigh, his eyes drifting from feature to feature as he took in the image of her.

“So. I really can’t express to you how much this means to me, that you’re here with me. I really never thought I’d find someone who would want to wish upon a plane taking off with me.”

With soft lips, he planted a kiss on her cheek. Both their eyes fluttered closed as they basked in the emotions they were feeling, the feelings they didn’t quite understand.

The ambience was broken when Rowan swung his door open, closing it gently so that the locking mechanism barely made a sound. She thanks him for it with a small smile, a subtle one. He knows that slamming doors send panic through her veins, knows that raised voices and smashing glasses put goose bumps on her arms.

He just knows her.

Entirely. Completely.

Her heart beat like the bass of a song she’d dance to at a party, and her head thumped like she was drunk. But it was all eclipsed when her door opened, and she was lifted with–both shocking and apt– ease into the arms of the only man she’s ever trusted.

A hand grasped her own, the connection sending her to another planet, whilst another snuck around her middle to unbuckle her seatbelt in the smoothest show of chivalry she’d ever seen. And Aelin had watched her fair share of movies.

“C’mon,” he whispered, wrapping her legs around his waist, and hoisting her up. He shut her door with a booted foot and made his easy way around to the bed. With her newfound height, she could make out pillows and blankets lining the unforgiving metal and plastic of the bed.

The fire in her heart crackled and spat as she thought back to all the late nights they had spent talking to each other, sharing their hopes and dreams, cuddled together like puzzle pieces. She’d never felt that sort of dedication, that absolute joy and happiness to be with her before.

The thrill of Rowan listening to her and putting effort into making her dreams come true filled her heart more than she could have ever imagined.

Before she could even think another thought beyond the overwhelming gratitude, she was placed on the lowered tailgate and his arms were tensing to pull himself up onto it. An awkward shuffle full of laughter and stomach stitches and collapsing into one another later, they snuggled into the back of the truck bed, heads leaning against pillows, limbs tangled together like messy strings of fate.

Like all the messy strings of fate that have managed to tangle Rowan and Aelin together.

It seemed like hours had passed, as they whispered to one another, lazy pointer fingers gesturing vaguely at the sky as they watched the planes flitting around the world. They shout out the animals they could see in the cotton candy clouds.

And when the planes take off, she mumbles wishes under her breath.

And Rowan was close enough to her that he hears them, but he pretended not to; tries to forget them, because he knows that the blonde beauty in his arms believed vehemently that a wish known by another person, was a wish that does not come true.

It’s her tenth wish of the same thing (and the tenth plane she’s wished on) when they were suddenly bathed in sensation. Blue and red lights splattered across her vision in a cruel show of power, whilst she placed her hands against her ears in a feeble attempt to block out the sirens that threatened to deafen her entirely.

The loud music she listened to when her parents fought had already done half the job for them.

With a spark in his eyes, her boyfriend turned to her, the very second, she turned to him, and mouthed the word ‘run’.

With hurried limbs, and hearts that were beating too fast (not because of the cop cars, obviously because of each other) they scrambled to be free of the height of the truck bed. In her Converse and his tired boots, they swung their arms forward and back, forward, and back, until they were panting and nearing the edge of the field.

With minds only half functioning, they were heading to the far corner of the field. The far corner of the field had no exit point. The bushes were only taller, and the barbed wire was only more menacing when you could see those spikes up close.

“Orynth Police Department, place your hands against the fence. Facing the fence!” An out-of-breath officer shouted, he was portly and yet still the quickest officer on the outdated force.

Aelin had to hand it to the man.

She truly did.

“Now kids, I have to ask, why did you run? My colleagues haven’t found any evidence of crimes beyond the obvious trespassing. I’m not quite understanding why.” The man was still catching his breath, hands grappling with his belt to find his handcuffs.

Aelin was quickly losing whatever admiration she’d had for the officer.

An indifferent shoulder raise moved its way through her body, whilst her mouth couldn’t seem to behave. “Figured running for it would make a good story, get me a little street cred, give me a wild story to tell the grandkids, but whaddya know? All it's gettin’ me is arrested. Mighty crazy, that is.”

the corner of the field, eleven o’clock.

Cool metal met warm flesh as he handcuffed Rowan’s arms behind his back, reading his rights to him as the officer radioed to his fellow officers that he had the situation under control. That the romantic teens were not in fact armed.

“Now, officer, why don’t we discuss this? Is this whole ‘arresting us’ thing really necessary? I mean, can’t you just slap us on the wrist, write a warning, and send us merrily on our way? Wouldn’t that be easier? Less paperwork for you could get home to your wife quicker.”

A chuckle left Rowan, disbelief that this crazy wild child girl was his girlfriend. Trust Aelin to try and sweet-talk an obviously seasoned police officer into letting them go.

With one hand around one arm of each of them, they were marched back to Rowan’s truck, and then further. An officer took Aelin around to the opposite side of the largest police car and pushed her into the backseat. Rowan restrained a growl at the rough handling, but before he could a hand was on top of his head, and he too was shoved into the backseat.

The second they were alone, laughter burst forth, bathing the car in the careless joy of teenage menaces. Despite their clean records, neither he nor Aelin were strangers to breaking the law.

Police officers filled the two front seats, and tried to quieten them down, but ultimately gave up. The innocence of him and Aelin just relishing in each other’s presence in the same backseat of the same cop car was enough to relax them some.

He threw jokes around at her, whilst she made fake passes at the officers and asked them if they had a light. They were light and easy despite the very real ramifications of their actions, and the crimes they could be tried for committing.

But caught in the moment, young and falling in love in the back of a cop car, neither could bring themselves to care.

Rowan wasn’t worried, as he watched Aelin’s nose twitch with an itch she could not scratch (and he laughed too hard at his own jokes he made about the situation). He couldn’t tear his eyes from the blonde of her eyelashes and the way he could pick them out in the dusky lighting. He was never going to be distracted again, as he watched Aelin exist, as she smiled, laughed, frowned, and sweet-talked her way into a telling-off from a middle-aged officer.

He was falling in love with her, deeply and irrevocably, and yet he was pretending this was the first he had heard it. That this was the beginning, when in fact that beginning was far too many years ago for him to remember exactly. Just a feeling of sudden warmth and belonging that he always felt when Aelin was nearby.

He wasn’t worried.

He was falling in love.

[shorkbrian]

Cottgecore

Prelude - This is all @dearestdynamight ‘s fault okay I take no responsibility for the horny..... or do I? aha Sorry I said I’d write a drabble but it turned into a one shot whoops

Pairing - Yandere Bakugou Katsuki X Fem Reader

Warnings - NSFW, noncon, predator/prey dynamics, unsafe sex, 

Music - https://open.spotify.com/track/3R8PKPTPgHApBhCt3NUJ0q?si=uLON1Rw_RHaEpH2WaCfYBA (This music has a great runnin tempo/ it made me think of heartbeats skippin like outta fear so)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Alright-” Bakugou has you by the arm, dragging you past the threshold of the cabin he keeps you in.

You’re scared. Sometimes he lets you outside, to feel the sunshine and the nice breeze, to go for a walk down to the creek, hiding his smile as you gawk at all the pretty flowers.

But he seems... agitated today. Restless.

“-Here’s how this is gonna go.” He shoves you down the front steps, and you barely catch yourself from falling, turning to look at the blonde while he sits himself down on the top step, legs stretching out. “I’ll give you hm, five minutes -  got that? You got five minutes to fuckin’ run, and then I let myself loose.”

“Wh-what?” You’re not understanding, hands anxiously twisting at each other. There’s a predatory look in Bakugou’s eyes.

“We’re gonna play tag. I’m fuckin’ bored and I wanna get a nice little workout in. Chasing your pretty little ass through the forest should be enough to get my blood pumping.” Is his simple explanation.

He’s letting you run?

You don’t dare to hope for a second that you’ll actually be able to get away, escape from the monster of a man that’s lounging on the steps in front of you. 

He’s hurt you, abused you, kept you locked away from society, far enough that no one’s able to hear when you scream every time Bakugou fucks you.  

“I..... I don’t want to play.” Your bottom lip quivers, but you can’t tell if you’re going to cry out of frustration or nervousness. You can’t believe that you’re nothing more than a toy to Bakugou, something he can play with when he’s bored, keep tucked away in the dark when he has better things to do.

Bakugou leans back, rests on an elbow, lets his crimson eyes rake up your form before they reach your gaze. “Yeah? You don’t wanna play? Is that cause you know you’ll fuckin’ lose? I bet you’ll cry like a little bitch when I catch you.”

There’s nothing that you want to say to him. He’s trying to egg you on, but you won’t fall for his mean tricks.

“Fucking fine.” He shifts, smug smile appearing. “Time starts now. I don’t care if you don’t run, but know that I don’t have any qualms about fuckin’ you right here after your five minutes are up.” His gaze his burning into you.

At least if you run, you won’t just be sitting here, waiting as Katsuki counts down the minutes.

You take off, down towards the creek behind the cabin, grateful that Bakugou let you keep your sneakers when he had first dragged you here, all those months ago.

They’re practically falling apart, squishing through the mud by the creek, and you almost lose your footing, scrambling to right yourself, splash across to the other side.

It doesn’t matter that your shoes are all wet now, that the bottom of your dress is dripping. Truthfully, you hate the dresses Katsuki brings home for you to wear. Hate that they’re clothes you’d love under normal circumstances, flowy dresses and cute patterns, fitting in so nicely to a cottage core aesthetic.

Branches snap underfoot as you crash through the brush, panting, focused on one thing and one thing only; getting as far away as you could, as fast as you can.

You don’t want to think about what’s going to happen when if Katsuki catches you, this twisted little game of tag he wants to play. You want to scream, this isn’t even how you play tag, he’s just using it as an excuse to hunt you down, to take pleasure out of your fear.

Moving too close to a tree had you yelping as your shoulder collided, the rough bark scratching up your skin, tearing your dress. No matter, you just needed to keep going, keep running, keep moving.

It was starting to hurt to breathe, lifting your legs was tiring, burning. You’d never been much of a runner, and being kept under lock and key at Bakugou’s cabin hadn’t exactly done wonders for your endurance.

You found yourself cursing that fact as a loud shout rang through the forest, words indiscernible. But you knew it was the blonde, could recognize raspy, manic voice that comprised the shout.

Five minutes was up.

Wheezing now, you pushed on. You briefly considered hiding, but quickly discarded that idea. Bakugou could track you, and you didn’t have enough time. You would have to worry that he’d be even rougher when if he caught you, hiding instead of running like he had wanted.

No time to rest, but you wanted to, lungs burning. You had a stitch in your side, your shoulder hurt from scraping against the tree, and your mouth was dry, throat parched.

It wasn’t long before you began to hear noises behind you, brush crashing, branches snapping, pleased laughter. You knew Bakugou was toying with you, knew that he could track you silently if he so chose. But no, he wanted you to know that he was coming, chasing you down, relentless.

It hurt to push your legs faster, muscles fatigued, cramping. Your left calf seized up, and you held in a shriek, pleading, begging your body to keep moving as you limped on, hurriedly dragging your cramping leg, refusing to stop.

“Keep on runnin’, I’ve almost fucking got you!” Bakugou crowed, and you spared a glance behind you, thankfully seeing nothing but an empty forest behind you. It meant you still had time.

But not enough time.

With a start, you realized the noises behind you had stopped, which meant that Katsuki was beginning to actually hunt, silent and ruthless.

You don’t know where he is now, nothing left to do but urge your body forward still, exhausted and terrified.

Then a weight’s pushing against your back, and you’re hitting the dirt, tackled by Bakugou, pinned down.

“I knew I’d fuckin’ get you.” He whispers to you, breath coming out in proud, ragged pants.

You whimper into the dirt, body already aching, your own breath knocked completely out of your chest because of the way the male had tackled you. You hurt all over, and now you were dirty, and Bakugou wouldn’t get off.

“Goddamn, you gave me a run for my money there. Didn’t think you’d be that fuckin’ fast, Jesus Christ.” You can tell he’s almost proud of you, proud of his ability to choose a partner.

He pushes his weight off of you, rising to his knees, and you quickly try to follow him, not fond of being splayed out on the ground underneath him.

But Bakugou doesn’t let you get far.

You’ve gathered your legs underneath you, pushing up off the ground, but the man curls a hand around your hip, the other gripping at your uninjured shoulder. You don’t even have time to draw in a breath to ask him what he was doing before he’s shoving your face back in the dirt, lifting your hips.

“Bakugou, wait!” You screeched, hands fumbling backwards as you try to grab at him, push him off you.

The man just laughs, loud and rough, shuffles closer so he can push his crotch against your ass, let you feel the sizable bulge he’s sporting. “What’s wrong princess? I won fair n’d square, now let me take my fuckin’ prize.”

A part of you knew, knew that this is how things would end. But you had wanted to believe, had hoped that it’d be different. 

“Please, wait, not here-not out here.” You choked, feeling him shift the fabric of your dress up over your ass, just enough so that he could tug at the fabric of your panties, snap the edges against your skin.

“N’d why the fuck not? ‘S not like anybody’ll hear you when you start screamin’.” The reality behind his words made your stomach curl, legs trembling as Katsuki snickered.

“Look at you, shakin’ like a scared little deer.”

Your panties get tugged down to your knees, and you hear the slight squish of Bakugou gathering his saliva in his mouth seconds before you hear him spit, seconds before you feel the glob of wet land on one of your cheeks.

Fingers swipe through the mess, before trailing down to your pussy, spreading Bakugou’s spit against your folds.

He apparently isn’t satisfied with that though, because you can feel him shifting, right before he grips a cheek in each hand and spreads you wide, pulls your hips backwards at the same time so you’re angled just right.

Just right for his spit to land directly on your cunt this time.

“S-stop it, please-” You shudder, giving up on trying to push him off. It’s never worked for you in the past, and you’re tired from running, sweaty body yearning to go limp.

A finger enters you, too soon, with not enough spit to ease its way. You yelp at the burning stretch, but Bakugou snarls at you too shut up, take what he’s given’ you as he slaps your ass.

You can feel the burn of his gaze as he watches your flesh jiggle from the force of his slap. 

He works fast, doesn’t have enough patience to go slow, to open you up properly for him. The mans riled up from the chase, full of adrenaline that has no where to go, and he wants to hammer away at your little body until you break. Bakugou knows he can build you back up again when you do.

It’s alarming when you feel fingers pull free, feel the hot, spongy head of a dick pressing up against your entrance. You aren’t ready, nowhere near wet enough. “Bakugou-Bakugou wait, wait! Bakug-oh!!” The scream that leaves your mouth is loud enough to startle birds, cause them to rise from their resting places in the trees.

Bakugou laughs a little at that, the sound quickly tapering off into a groan as he works his cock deeper into you, wiggling his hips from side to side so he can fully seat himself into your cunt, balls snug up against your clit.

“Yeah, go ahead and scream princess, lemme hear you.” He encourages, pulling out just an inch or two so he can slam back in, hear you sob, watch your shoulder shake. with each heaving breath.

He’s fucking you into the dirt like an animal, feral and uncontrolled, wild. You barely have the coordination to try and protect your face with your forearms, keep your sensitive skin from being scraped raw on the ground.

You can’t protect your knees though, or the places that Katsuki holds you from, his grip too tight, blunt nails pressing so deep into your flesh that they draw blood, the pressure biting.

It’s impossible to hold back your noises, tearful, fearful screams reverberating into the forest, choked off as you’re rocked back and forth by vicious thrusts.

The man moves easily, fucks you with the strength of a stallion, growling out your name, letting out throaty groans as he chases his release.

And it hurts, so much, your body battered and becoming scratched and bruised; it hurts so much. Until heat pools in your gut, Katsuki hitting a special spot inside you. It makes your toes curl in your sneakers, has the slide of his cock going just a bit easier as you get that much wetter.

“Unh, n-no-ooh, please, ah! Please, ohh, Bak-Bakug-” You can’t even finish your sentence, not with the blonde reaching around, hand creeping across your stomach, down to where his balls keep smacking against your skin so he can rub tight little circles around your clit.

“Fuck-fuck yeah princess, there we go. Feelin’ good now? Shit, you’re squeezing me so goddamn tight.”

You hated his voice, hated how deep and raspy it was, how his gruff moans of pleasure made your stomach jolt with arousal.

“You tryin’ t’ milk my cock or somethin’? You want my cum that fucking bad?” The man pounding you into the dirt laughed, changing his posture so that he was curled over you, chest pressed to your back.

His hips rabbited into you, and you sobbed freely at the sensation, at his horrible fingers that wouldn’t stop drawing shapes on your little clit, making you feel hot and too close to cumming.

“No, no, no-” You whimpered, trying to hold back your orgasm, but it was too little, too late.

Bakugou’s hips stuttered as you gushed around his cock, barely managing three more full thrusts before burying himself deep, cock twitching inside of you, spurting out his warm cum.

Disgusting.

You were too tired, too spent to care how long the two of you spent on the ground, regaining your breath.

When Bakugou peeled himself away from your body, soft cock slipping easily from your warmth, you couldn’t help but cringe at the wetness that spilled against your thigh, no longer plugged in your cunt.

“That was real fucking good.”

Yeah, maybe for him.

Your panties were pulled back up, Bakugou smoothing them down before flipping your dress back into place as he rose to his feet.

He urged you up, supporting most of your weight as he easily tugged you upright. “Knew you’d be too much of a baby to walk back.” He grouched as your knees trembled, almost sending you crashing back to the ground if not for his firm arm around your waist, holding you up.

The next second, you were being lifted into the air, easily swung up into Katsuki’s arms, carried bridal style.

You felt his eyes on you, scanning over your face, your arms, your legs. Cataloging the various scratches and bruises marring your form. “You look like shit.”

You didn’t have a smart retort, just rested your head against his chest, grateful that he wasn’t making you walk, legs weak and jelly-like.

Your throat hurt from screaming.

Bakugou took you home, back to his cabin, to the cottage core life that you’d think was perfect... if only he wasn’t in it.