#you can take my armor and put me in jail but you can't make me be reasonable

[whataboutsimple]

Simple AUs

Or AUs I have idea of, but will never work on. Feel free to use them if you wish to!

1. Villain!Olivia AU or what happens when nerd's idol dies.

Concept is rather simple: after Ellegaard's death Olivia looses it and uses 100% of her brain power to build a "perfect world" where no one will die ever again. Expect for those who won't elaborate of course..

During the WitherStorm she gets into tracker bim for too long and gets withersickennes. Of course she won't tell anyone to not cause any panic. They already have sick Petra, no one should be paying attention to her.

Jesse decides to go and look for Magnus, but why? They need someone smart, someone intelligent, not a walking craze creeper man! Argh, Jesse always took Axel's said.

No- no, no, nonononono- Jesse can't take Ellegaard armor! She finally found someone who understands her passion for redstone, she can't loose her!

What.. what do you mean they lied? What- N-no.. sh-.. no. S-shE coulDn't! SHe diDN't LIE! THAT'S CAN'T BE-

The storm defeated, but her sickness didn't fade away. Ah, might as well make some upgrades for her arm..

Now, now Jesse, don't be so scared- let's work together! Trust me, this.. machine won't let anyone get hurt anymore!

Well, it could've gone better. But, ah, at least now no one can get in my way.

Notes: Olivia got her hand replaced with mechanisms, she got Jesse killed, she uses the same concept as "PAMA" — chiping people to use them.

2. Sky city death AU.

Concept: Instead of landing in the lake, like Jesse normally should, they are too slow to react properly and won't make it in time.

Lukas saw it with his own eyes. He saw Jesse landing to the ground. He saw their inventory laying around like it was a pile of trash.

Even with broken arm Lukas manages to get himself and the Founder back to Sky City. Petra and Ivor are happy until they get the news.

It can't be, right? It's Jesse. They always make it out! Or maybe not this time..

Blaze Rods got arrested and putted in jail until the group will find a way to their home. Lukas won't leave them here. He'll come back and take them to the court back in BeaconTown. He'll do anything to get them pay.

Now the problem is: how will they get back? Without Jesse it's gonna be hard for sure..

Petra and Ivor can't get everyone in the mansion trust them enough, so they make decisions. Lukas almost died from White Pumpkin. They barely made it out alive from the Mansion.

No one made alive from the Mansion expect for them. Cassie Rose got the flint, so now they can only follow her through the portal.

Who can keep Petra sane? She's too irritated and Lukas is no better: he saw his friend's death for fuck sakes! Ivor already saw such tension between Order members.. Old Order members.

They are no match to PAMA. Ivor physically can't do everything alone what Jesse did. Is it the end?

Notes: Lukas arm became useless right after they left Sky City, everyone from the Mansion Episode died expect for the group and Cassie Rose, Cassie Rose managed to escape before main group.

3. Long live the king AU.

Concept: Aiden and Jesse swap places, but keep their original characters. It's hard, but everyone tries their best.

Aiden is noisy and bit of a dumbass.. but they love him, though it's hard sometimes. He doesn't know any limits without them, so it's like controlling an angry pug.

They never understood why he was so rude to Jesse. They were nothing but kind and patient! They even kept Maya and Gill in place. Aiden still didn't like them somewhy.

Okay, this time he got too far. How could he put other people in danger? How could he hurt poor pig? They need to talk and now! Winning ain't worth it!

He promised to apologize. Okay, at least they knew he kept his promises.

Oh, uh, since when Petra and him are friends? Okay, nevermind, she needs help - they will help. Still though last time they checked Petra wasn't a big fan of Aiden's behavior..

What is thing thing?! How are they supposed to defeat it? What are they gonna do? What- wait, Aiden is a good leader actually when it's comes to stress situations.

Okay, maybe they can handle it. If only he could stop throwing those dirty looks at Jesse everytime they do anything..

Notes: Olivia and Axel tries their best to deal with Aiden's behavior, though it can be hard sometimes.. Aiden saved Jesse from tracker bin since they were the closest to him instead of Petra or Gabriel, we will learn through the story how angry gremlin can actually be a good character without erasing his gremlin side.

That's my Top3 for today, guys! Feel free to ask anything you want or use the ideas.

[beeceit]

Leonardo, come down here, and put that back

You ever get too into the short character study you meant to leave in the tags of someone else's post and accidentally write a 1033 word one shot told in the second person about someone else's character meeting yours?

Haha me neither, anyways... here's my take on what I think it would be like for LDC Leo and POB Uncle Nardo to meet <3 Bonus points if you catch all the other peepaws referenced

@nani-nonny teehee

Out of all of the bizarre situations you’ve found yourself in over the course of your life, this ‘peepaw multiverse convention’ was certainly far up there. 

Dozens of alternates of yourself and your former brothers, even some Aprils (though not many) stand around chatting, recounting stories, showing off their little selves.

Most of them seem to get on fairly well, splitting into little groups like a highschool cafeteria.

Well, what you imagine a highschool cafeteria looks like, you’ve never been.

There’s the smart ones, the cool ones, the tired ones. And, inevitably, the class clowns.

Some booty shorts wearing jackass covered in stickers keeps chucking empty waterbottles and paper airplanes at your head. You can't tell if he genuinely doesn’t realize that you could kill him easily if you wanted or if he just doesn't care. 

He's wrapped around his own Mikey now, the weight that constantly dragged on his shoulders, on every Leonardo’s shoulders, almost vanished from that single touch. Lucky bastard.

You had your own Mikey once. You fucked that up, too. Pushed him away. Twisted yourself until you could scarcely be called brothers anymore. And still, after it all, in his desperate final act of life he tried to save you. Not only you, the stupid selfish blueprint that became you.

That useless arrogant child you once had been.

Everything you've been through, everything you've lost, it was all your own fault. It was his fault. You can see the cracks in the armor. The foundational flaws that will lead him down the path to becoming you. Distantly, you think maybe you could still save this world's version of your family if you just get rid of the common denominator.

You can't mistake this as justice, though. As a good deed. You don't want him dead as a precaution, you want him dead for revenge. You're selfish, self-righteous, focused. In him you can see the son you used to be. The part of you that was a brother, a friend, the part that has long since faded in your chest glows so brightly in him. But you must extinguish it. He deserves this. You both deserve this.

The new guy gives you a look that you don't understand. 

Oh, right.

You shake yourself out of the memory. Out of the corner you find your own counterpart engaged in a very one sided conversation with another young Leo, a feral looking one legged creature with the conversational skills of a busted up talking tom. Some part of you is glad he seems to be making friends. 

God, you felt old. And this place didn’t have nearly enough alcohol to even begin to process… that whole situation. You turn back to the new guy. It’s been a while since any of them got this close to you. Most of the other Leonardos herded their littler ones away from what had been deemed ‘naughty gay peepaw jail’, which is the stupidest name they could give your self-imposed little angsting corner, but maybe not inaccurate.

You finally identify the look the new one’s giving you. It’s pity.

Disgusting.

He's young. Too young to be here, you think, as if you could really be the judge of that. He's not even 30 yet, hasn't even reached 6 foot. Still has 2 arms. Ah well, for now, at least.

He's too happy.

Something in his scarf makes a chirping sound. 

The new guy, Nardo you’ve heard him called (And god, you used to be Nardo once upon a time), reaches in and pulls out a small creature, hardly bigger than an oreo. You’d almost have thought it was a strange rock if you hadn’t seen the little tail emerging from under his shell thumping against Nardo’s hand. Nardo chuckles and kisses his head with such tenderness.

“Bitty, buddy, you weren’t supposed to wake up from your nap just yet.” The tiny thing babbles indignantly but is quickly quieted when Nardo rubs a finger against his cheek and under his chin.

It’s disgustingly cute.

And disgustingly familiar.

You’ve seen the family photo album, seen the pictures of your own father (former father) snuggling up against an incomprehensibly small version of yourself the exact same way. You’ve seen a handful of Leonardos with children of their own, amalgamations of turtles and rabbits (why so many rabbits?) and humans and different sorts of turtles. 

That’s not just a Leonardo’s baby, that’s a baby Leonardo.

He was so helpless and small. Precious, fragile, innocent.

But he was still a Leonardo.

You had been like him once, before, you knew you had. How had such a sweet little creature become the murderer that ended the world? Nardo held Bitty out to you, cupping his hand to keep him securely held. You made eye contact with the child for less than an entire second before he chirped, frightened, and nuzzled back into Nardo’s palm, shaking.

Nardo frowned and pulled him back to his chest, stroking his shell with his thumb.

“I’m sorry, he’s never reacted to anyone like that before. I’m sure he’ll warm up to you eventually, he’s just still tired.” He was afraid of you. Terrified. You hadn’t so much as said a word to him and the child saw right through you. Even an infant was able to see the blood on your hands. 

His wet afraid eyes matched your own counterpart’s scarily well. The chirps of fear and your own Leo’s screams overlapped. Would you have done the same thing if your counterpart were so small? You don’t think you would, but then again, at Nardo’s age you wouldn’t have thought you’d do a lot of the things you’ve done.

“Hey, uh, you okay? I gotta get the little guy somewhere a little quieter for a minute, but I can come back. I’m sure I won’t have any trouble finding someone to watch Bitty for me, I’ve already had to fend off at least eight kidnapping attempts this morning.” Nardo looked at you with concern, genuine concern, even after you scared his baby. He really was too young to be here. “Don’t worry about me, just go.”

“Oh, uh, alright. I’ll see you later?”

“Pray that you don’t.”

[the-firebird69]

It's a huge pain he gets hit all the time and he says really stupid stuff he won't leave my son alone and laundry does business it comes in and says stuff well he's bleeding out to bother our son Clinton has been doing it for years but a bunch of other people have been doing it so I figured he should do all of it and he's losing everything and you plan to do it and it's supposed to try and make it look like other people and it's not and there's no deception and we just hammering on him and he's asking for it all the time so it's not even 11:00 and he is lost probably another half of his personal fortune in Florida to people just taking it out of his account because they're tired of hearing him wine and threatening and he's trying to get all sorts of stuff in them to try and heal and he can't and he's bleeding now and someone called the ambulance and he's refusing and they said you can't refuse because you are gunshot and a suspect of being involved in a shootout cuz I heard it and see if it had a weapon and they called the police the police headed down there already and you missed it CAA AKA Zeus because you're busy in the bathroom and Hera is laughing he says this is the top notch agent and he said I'm like the Pink panther or Don Adams but I always be James Bond to you so she's laughing and smiling and all the same girl testing me I don't know who the hell you are. And really he had no clue she says. There's a welcome surprise and it saved his life she says and is true boy I would relief. And she continues and says John remillard is so ridiculous and there's a lot of people who can't figure it out and he's got this big huge massive a****** attitude and routine and nobody is stopping him and he's absolutely the worst person that she has ever met or heard from and Mac is like this normal person now trying to get by and has a decent attitude when this guy comes along it ruins everyone's day so they kind of happy what happened and it was Dan because Trump was trying to attack him and there's a witness too and they're going to testify and he's going to probably be in court today and in jail right now the cops arrived and they're holding him down and confident and they're addressing the bleeding and they're taking him to the prison hospital because he's an escape convict and the Dan is a fugitive and they are seeking him on the APB and he'll be apprehended too and he may not be responsible for the shooting but they have illegal weapons and that's another thing going on they're advertising that but wow what a pain in the ass

We are taking over more companies and they are big companies and they are and hero want to say something

Thor Freya we do thank you for your attention this is a hellish place for a son and our people and he knows it's an example and it's terrifying but that's what it's like

My husband is under severe duress but he is thinking of us and trying to invent things for us and he did he said there's an iron Man suit and there's a system you can use we put one arm in in hand and you and it's a light armor suit for motorcycles and then it was a hinged so it closes and it seals you have to clip all the sides but you can reach it all with the soonest someone flexible it has joints and it's fully armored and it's light armor it's about 1/8 of an inch titanium alloy and it works at 400 mph you can hit a guardrail not head on but you can glance off it without getting hurt at all a special foam in it and you put one arm in and you slide one boot on and the suit closes on a hinge on the rest of it and you snap it together with quick snaps and you're off and it is an awesome system it works very well and you can raise the helmet and face the face shield all the way up on the helmet but the helmet is a fixed and you snap the neck together and you snap the helmet and two places and it's really slick we worked on it for quite a while to get it right it took actually it took a week and we did it a while ago but this is out on the market and it's ours and it's by Bell and people think it's the greatest and people think all sorts of things apparently but it is Bell helmet that is putting it out and it's rated and approved and it is approved for racing and it's a proof the light cycle racing circuit so a ton of people will buy it if they have light cycles it's an intensive suit of armor and it works very very well and there's huge other applications for it too we can use it in construction of and yeah there's going to be some sirens down here apparently you can use in construction and you can use it in all sorts of rescue operations and they do tons of them and they do we do have a cooling system and fire rated system on the inside of many of them and it's much better in a suit believe us but people think it's colder and you're safer but no if you get a blast of fire you're going to cook as as opposed to not cooking it's a big difference and yeah insects can't get in and by the way it does have resistivity to most insects up to about 20 foot they can put you in their mouth or step on you and you won't break get the 34th in there heavy but they're mandibles can't do anything they're up to like 80 ft or 100 ft depending people don't know that.

And such a good time you know people come in with excuses and stuff so we are underway and selling them there's also another issue that we have and it's with the living condition and we want them out they are horrible horrible people and their mess and they bother people come up to you and try and touch things and Men it's gross but it's an advertisement about the clones and the clones are upset about it and they are going after them for it they're going after I'm pretty steadily too.

And see how they behave if they think he's occupied it's really rude and he's a bum this guy and I was going to try and do something so she is back again here we go this is what he has to do everyday is winners and really there's no laundry in here this is sticking your head in there it's a train say that she put stuff in there and is an a****** it's really he but I finally charges

Hera

We're following through and we're putting the charges in now

Thor Freya

And we're going to try to join the Lord and dan right now I'm going to the court and I put it in there. He said they had weapons they didn't but they grab them and tried to go back now they're going to be brought to trial today

Bitol and Goddess Wife

They're also going to be on trial for their shootout downtown is very illegal and they'll probably get convicted but we want to add this to it or a separate trial so there's two the first one lends to the second

It's good work it's excellent work and he's getting impatient because the idiots are still swarming around him and we have to send people in or assigning units and asking for volunteers on top of it and we need much more many more people for permanent duty here we have a big plan

Olympus

[toomuchdickfort]

I'm like 'I'm not gonna be a criminal this time through skyrim' and then steal things the first chance I get

[mypoisonedvine]

can we get more dark batman smut 😮‍💨

yes you can my good sir/madam/gentleperson!

"I said I didn't wanna see you out on the street again," the painfully-familiar deep voice rang out from behind you. You spun on your heel, nearly dropping the bag you'd just been stuffing with bricks of cash.

"Right, I remember that," you chuckled nervously. "Well, I said I didn't wanna pay for my surgery and, whaddaya know, they said I had to, so..."

You shrugged, struggling to act nonchalant as the massive, dark figure loomed before you.

"Can't always get what you want," you finished, but just as you reached for another stack of hundreds, a gloved hand grabbed painfully tight onto your wrist.

"You're not paying for surgery with this," he informed you sternly. "You're cleaning it through half a dozen shell corporations, and feeding it right back into the mob."

You swallowed thickly. "Okay, you know your stuff," you admitted, "guess you're not just muscle..."

"I told you what would happen if I saw you doing this again," he grumbled, "do you remember?"

It was sort of burned into your mind, since he said it while he had you pressed up against a brick wall, blue eyes piercing through you from behind the mask and the makeup. I'll make you regret it, he had told you. All you did was nod at him then, and you nodded again now; and suddenly he was on top of you, bending you over the table and trapping you with his strength. He kicked your legs apart as you struggled, pressing his weight onto your back until you could hardly breathe.

"I told you what I'd do, and you're still here," he explained. "That means you want it."

But you hadn't known he meant this, in fact you hadn't known what he meant at all until that exact moment that he pressed his hips against your ass and you could feel something hard— with a thick armored suit covered in tools and weapons, that could be anything, but your stomach sank and you gasped shallowly because somehow you knew.

"Wait," you pleaded hoarsely, "stop, don't—"

"You want this," he insisted again, grabbing the back of your head to shove your face down against the table. His other hand moved lower and started tearing your pants down as tears gathered in your eyes.

"Please," you whimpered, "I'm sorry— you won't see me again, really, I swear— I'm gonna clean my act up, get on the straight and narrow, you'll see—"

He shut you up with a harsh spank to your bare ass, making you whine from equal parts pain and fear. "Too late for that," he explained, and you heard him messing with his clothes until, apparently, he'd done enough to free his cock. It was hard and hot against the back of your thigh, and he groaned slightly as he rocked his hips to rub it on your skin.

"Fuck," you whimpered, "oh god, this isn't happening..."

"This is what you wanted," he insisted one more time, voice a little softer now, before he shoved himself inside you in one go.

It stung, it felt like he was tearing you open, and you cried helplessly with no one to hear you but him... maybe that was why he waited until you were in the vault to corner you. So no one would hear you scream.

"Tight," he mumbled, partially to himself, as he held you still at your hips and started to fuck you.

You had no choice but to give in now, and yet it was hard to do when pain made your toes curl in your boots. He started to fuck you faster already, a sickening wet sound echoing in the small room; you whimpered pathetically, clenching your fists so tight that your palm would probably bear marks in the shape of your nails.

"You should've listened," he scolded, leaning down to speak right in your ear. "You should've turned yourself in instead of getting right back to stealing from the people of Gotham— jail might be the only place you're safe from me."

You wouldn't be safe from him anywhere anymore, not with this burned into your mind— not with the threat that he could be around any corner, ready to put you in your place again.

"Just be good and this won't take too long," he bargained. "Do what you're told, and I won't hurt you more than I have to."

Shamefully, you nodded. You felt his hot breath against your neck and, ironically, it made you shiver.

He whispered his first of what was sure to be many instructions: "Admit it... admit that you wanted this."

[hangezoeenthusiast]

You failed me

multiple x gn!reader

word count: 2,524

warnings: cursing, yelling, arguing, death, angst, blood, explosion, the egg (it deserves its own warning)

synopis: you guys failed me(us)

(the lyrics go with each person, might not get everyone, and also xd’s part is kinda wonky)

song: rät by penelope scott

I come from scientists and atheists and white men who kill God They make technology, high quality, complex physiological Experiments and sacrilege in the name of public good They taught me everything, just like a daddy should

Quackity, Karl, George, and Sapnap left you. Your mentors, your friends. The ones who taught you everything you knew. They went to build their little “Kinoko Kingdom” while you stayed in the ruins, the dust. “They’ll regret that.” you swore. You built something better, something greater.

It was called “Las Nevadas”. A place where everyone was allowed. They would remember not to fuck with you. They would soon realize that they should watch their back for the rest of their short, stupid lives.

“Watch out, you guys, I'm watching your every move.”

And you were beautiful and vulnerable and power and success God damn, I fell for you, your flamethrowers, your tunnels, and your tech I studied code because I wanted to do something great like you And the real tragеdy is half of it was true

Wilbur majorly fucked up. He was supposed to be with you to the end, your guys’ country, right? No. He left you behind. He went to find peace, find his heaven, while you stayed on earth, wallowing away until your flesh seeped off your rattling bones, rotting away by yourself, with no one to bare witness.

“Why didn’t you bring me with you Wilbur?” you asked his stupid grave on top of the once L’Manburg. “Why did you get the ecstasy, why do I get the remains?”

“I’m coming for you Wilbur, and when I do, we are going to wreck upon justice on everyone who wronged us, wronged you, they will feel our wrath.”

But we've been fuckin' mеan, we're elitist, we're as flawed as any church And this faux-rad West coast dogma has a higher fuckin' net worth I bit the apple 'cause I trusted you, it tastes like Thomas Malthus Your proposal is immodest and insane And I hope someday Selmers rides her fuckin' train

"Y/n!" Technoblade yelled. "I TRUSTED YOU, AND YOU BETRAYED ME, FOR WHAT, TO BLOW UP A STUPID COUNTRY, A COUNTRY THAT WAS DOOMED TO FAIL FROM THE START." He started to battle you, missing every single swing, blinded by fury.

“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE.”

"LOOK AT ME GODDAMN IT."

You looked up at him in the eyes and boldly said, "No, Techno, don’t you see, you’re in the wrong here, you’re the one who betrayed me." You were blinded by friendship, you couldn’t see that Tommy had betrayed Techno, and that what the Butcher Army did to Techno was terrible.

"What do you mean Y/n, you know what they did, they wronged me, they used me, they tortured me, they gave me hell, so I gave it back to them, I destroyed the things they loved, the people they loved, you see Y/n, those who have treated me with kindness I will repay that kindness tenfold, and those who treat me with injustice, that use me, that hunt me down, that hurt my friends, I shall repay that injustice a thousand times over, do you understand?"

"No I don't, Techno, you can't do this.” you begged. He pushed you out of the way, "Get out of my way Y/n." “No, I won’t, I won’t let you destroy everything we worked for.”

“Well, then I have to fight you.”

And thus the battle began, Swords clashing against each other, blood spilling from open wounds, friends digging each other into a whole both of them couldn’t get out of. Techno was letting you off easy, he knew his strength, he knew that he could’ve beaten you in one swipe, but he didn’t want to kill you.

So when you had the opportunity, you swept from under his feet, and knocked him down. You placed your blade onto his neck, pressing down until a little drop of blood appeared, “Stay down Technoblade, or I’ll do something worse than try to put you on trial.”

He watched as you walked away from him, trying to save L’Manberg from a worst fate than death itself.

“One day Y/n, you’ll see, I’m on your side.”

I loved you, I loved you, I loved you, it's true I wanted to be you and do what you do I lived here, I loved here, I bought it, it's true I feel so stupid, and so used I feel so used

"Why would you do that Dream? You didn't have to do that." you interrogated. Dream had stupidly blew up the community house. You both didn't plan that, he had gone behind your back. "I had to Y/n, you wouldn't understand."

"What do you mean I don't understand, you went against my back, we were supposed to-" you cut off yourself, "Dream, don't you understand, you did something stupid, and what did you get, you got stupid jail." "The reason I did that is because I needed to isolate myself from humanity." he said, proudness lacing his words.

"What do you mean?" you questioned. "If anyone knows I can revive people, I'm screwed, so that's why I need to be by myself, yeah it sucks major ass, but at least no one else will know, well, besides you anyways." "I have a task for you Y/n/n, I need you to find a way to bring Tommy and Ghostbur in here."

"Why Dream?"

"I'm going to revive Wilbur."

I was your baby, your firstborn, the hot girl in your comp-sci class And I was Darwin's prep school dream, bred, born and raised to kick your ass I fell for circuit boards, rocket ships, pictures of the stars If you could only be what you pretend you are

"PHILZA MINECRAFT COME BACK HERE." you were chasing Phil, through the woody forest, covered by oak trees. He had information on Technoblade's whereabouts and you needed it. You chased him with your enchanted netherite armor, netherite sword and axe, and a few op potions. Your goal was to capture Philza and interrogate him on where Techno's place was. The thing was, you were his child. His own child trying to kill his own son.

He felt betrayed, his own child turned against him and their brother, their family. "The Butcher Army must've gotten to you somehow." he thought in his head. Surely, his darling Y/n didn't do it on their own will, right?

He was incorrect, you did it because you believed that Techno needed to be brought to justice, by punishment. You believed that your own sibling needed to die, because he was a "liability" to L'Manberg's growth and future. He needed to die because as long as he would live his long life with his little enderman Edward, retired, he would still cause trouble to everything you, Quackity, Tubbo, Fundy, and Ranboo had built.

He pleaded, "Stop Y/n, you don't have to do this." You argued, "I do Philza, as long as he lives, my plans for L'Manberg will forever cease to exist."

He felt like shit, you called him Philza, not Dadza, or Dad, or anything besides his normal name. "Did I screw something up?" he asked himself quietly under his breath. "Yes you did Phil, you took the traitor's side." you had heard Phil mumble.

"HE'S NOT A TRAITOR." Phil yelled at you. "Yes he is, he deserves what he is about to get, I will say it again, where is his base?"

"I'm not saying, Y/n, why are you doing this, Techno is your own sibling." "He's not my sibling anymore, that stopped when he destroyed L'Manberg, you're lucky I forgived you." you declared.

"Y/n/n, please don't do this."

"I have to Dadza, I can't let him roam free."

When I said take me to the moon, I never meant take me alone I thought if mankind toured the sky, it meant that all of us could go But I don't want to see the stars if they're just one more piece of land For us to colonize, for us to turn to sand

Bad had tried to convice you to join the Eggpire. You had no effect while being next to the egg, and he had to take you out. People who had no effect towards the egg had to be eliminated.

He was creepily following you, waiting until you stopped to get a chance to capture you. He had hope that you did have an effect, that you would join the Egg with him. He didn't want to kill you, you were his best friend, besides Skeppy of course.

"Come back here Y/n." he said. "No chance in hell Bad, get the fuck away from me." "HEY, LANGUAGE!" he exclaimed. "No language, get away from me, you're creeping me out."

He threw his trident, spinning in the air, trying to catch up to your frantic steps. You were trying to get to Church Prime, where no one could kill anyone, hopefully Bad would abide to that rule. You were just about to step on Church Prime when you bumped into a hard, armored chest.

You looked up shyly, and saw Punz, with his red eyes reflecting anger. "Where are you going Y/n?" he questioned. "Somewhere." you blankly stated. You were desperate, you didn't want to die, or anything else that Bad was going to do to you. You tried to dodge Punz, but he placed a hand on your shoulder, "Stay right here Y/n."

"No, get away from me, I don't know what's wrong with all of you, but go away, I don't want anything to do with your stupid Eggpire." He raged, and grabbed your wrist heavily, "DON'T TALK ABOUT THE EGG LIKE THAT, IT WILL TAKE CONTROL OF THE SERVER, AND YOU ALL WILL BE ITS SERVANTS." "LET ME THE FUCK GO PUNZ." you screamed. You were wiggling in his grip, trying to escape his lunatic self.

While he was holding you, you saw two other shadows behind you. It was Antfrost and Bad. "What do you guys want from me, I didn't do anything wrong."

"You are against the Egg Y/n, people who are like you and Tommy have to die."

"Well, I'm not dying today." you murmured under your breath. "What was that you said?" Antfrost asked you.

You smirked, "I'm not dying today, I'll tell you one more time, let go of me."

Bad and Antfrost walked closer to you, Punz right behind you, all of them cornering you into a tight spot. "What you going to do about it Y/n, you're cornered."

"You'll know when they get here, but for now, you better run boys."

'Cause we're so fuckin' mean, we're so elitist, we're as fucked as any church And this bullshit West coast dogma has a higher fuckin' net worth I bit the apple 'cause I loved you, and why would you lie? And then I realized that you're just as naïve as I am Oh, you're so traumatized it makes me want to cry

"Tubbo, don't do this." Schlatt had unfortunately found out that you were a spy, that you were on Pogtopia's side. He had ordered Tubbo to kill you with fireworks, to light you on fire, give you blisters all over your body. "Please Tubbs, you're my friend." you pleaded.

"I can't Y/n/n, or something worse will happen." he whispered to you. "What do you mean?" you asked. "He can-" he trailed off, looking somewhere else besides your eyes. "Tubbo, you don't have to do what that stupid bastard tells you to do, you're your own person, with your own thoughts and actions."

"I'm sorry Y/n, I hope you can forgive me."

"TUBBO N-" you was cut off by firewords hitting your skin, making blisters and burn marks all over your body. You lost your second canon life, feeling betrayed by Tubbo. He killed you for what, a stupid father who never cared about him in his entire life, a father who exiled his friends that actually treated him like a person, and not like some random piece of trash.

You respawned in your bed, feeling bruises and bumps mostly on your forearms and your back.

"I'll help you Tubbo, I’ll get rid of him.”

You dumb bitch I loved you, I loved you, I loved you, it's true I wanted to be you and do what you do I lived here, I loved here, I bought it, it's true I'm so embarrassed, I feel abused

“Come on Y/n/n, come with me.” Punz begged of you. He wanted you to visit the Egg. You didn’t want to be controlled by a stupid omelette. "I'm not Punzo, why are you so obsessed with that stupid thing."

"DON'T SPEAK OF THE EGG LIKE THAT."

You put your hands in front of you, accidentally touching Punz's chest, "Ok calm down buddy." He didn't calm down and instead yelled at you on why you had to join the Eggpire.

"If you join, you will be forever happy."

"If you join you'll get whatever you want."

You were tired of the members of the Eggpire to convince you to join them, you didn't like eggs anyway. "Punz, for the last time, I'm not joining you, stop telling me."

“Then you have to die.”

So fuck your tunnels, fuck your cars, fuck your rockets, fuck your cars again You promised you'd be Tesla, but you're just another Edison 'Cause Tesla broke a patent, all you ever broke were hearts I can't believe you tore humanity apart

“XD!” You were pissed at him, he had destroyed your house, made your friends pissed at you, just everything you liked. All because he wanted you for himself.

He wanted you to be dependent on his every word, and he was being a manipulative psychopath. And you didn’t tolerate that, it was like he was his human counterpart, Dream.

He walked to you with confidence, waiting for to get a hug from you, well, he didn’t get that. You slapped him so hard his head swung to the left.

“WHAT THE FUCK.”

“That’s what you get you stupid son of a bitch. You fucking ruined everything.” “Calm down Y/n/n, what is wrong?” He acted concerned, but you knew that he was faking. He would do anything to get someone’s approval.

“DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT’S WRONG, IT’S YOU, YOUR STUPID PRESENCE IN MY LIFE. YOU KEEP ON WALKING AROUND LIKE YOU FUCKING OWN THE PLACE.”

“Calm down darling, just take some netheri-” you interrupted him by slapping the ore out of his hands. “I don’t need jack shit from you XD, you know what, take back the necklace, I don’t want it.” You pulled the shiny, green emerald necklace off your neck, and pulled XD’s palm out.

You placed the necklace filled with memories, and put it on his hand. You closed up his palm, and walked away, leaving XD to his own accord.

“We could’ve had evertything X.”

[ginjointsintheworld]

It’s mostly localized to just Lauren now but people hold Leyren to such high standards none of the other couples and characters have to meet. Like I remember back when the season three finale aired a few people were saying that Lauren having that moment in the closet and not telling Leyla about it meant they weren’t a stable couple and that Lauren didn’t trust her but that was Lauren’s fears getting the better of her and it was a lot, but was she not supposed to feel anything? A lot of people saw that moment as her being entitled instead of vulnerable but I’d argue that telling Leyla and immediately dampening her excitement would’ve actually been entitled and selfish. 1

Of course Lauren should’ve talked to Leyla but that scene was her dealing the best way she knew how to and people aren’t perfect. Everyone’s issues gets written of and their relationships get space to grow but Lauren has to atone forever. I mean Max has asked so much of Helen and she’s repeatedly put herself out for him but it’s brushed off as romantic, somehow. Even the things he does that cause ripple effects for everyone are chalked up to being for the greater good even though he almost always makes things worse when he screws up. 2

if there's one thing my rewatch has reminded me of, it's how much emotional burden max asked helen to carry for him, even at moments when she specifically told him it was too much (ex. when she passed off his cancer treatment care to another doctor and he repeatedly asked her to take him back as a patient). hell lol in 4x02 helen tells max to his face that she doesn't trust him to be a partner who will follow through in their relationship and that she fears he may drag her down. now, of course we see him take steps to assuage her fears but my point is, relationships aren't always sunshine and roses and it's real suspicious that leyren is the one that gets held to the expectation that they must do every single thing right or be labeled toxic/unworthy/unhealthy/etc.

i've just come to accept that among some fans, lauren can never atone for her mistakes in s1 even though i'd argue that she's well beyond paid her price for it within the realms of main character armor (so excluding things like imprisonment, getting fired, losing license, etc). the only way they'll be satisfied is if lauren exists in a perpetual state of suffering and hardship with only occasionally ounces of happiness. take for example, the people who keep insisting that lauren should go to jail for the donation she made. completely disregarding the fact that nottingham's family donated an entire BUILDING for his residency spot and it's not a secret given that floyd knew about it. but they keep harping on this point despite canon showing that it's not illegal. or even lauren bringing in cops for extra security in the ED. cameras and metal detectors weren't going to protect her staff from attacks my patients drunk or high and physically larger. but once casey made it clear that the cops' presence made them feel just as unsafe, she corrected her mistake and threw herself in front of another aggravated patient because it was never about the cops, it was about the ability to protect her staff for anymore harm in any way she can. yet these are two things i see repeatedly held against lauren.

meanwhile you have max who because of his all or nothing approach to every issues, doesn't think about the nuances and that can result in situations like the pain medicine. opioids prescription were down but because of his bull in a china shop approach and hospital wide policy, it caused pain and suffering for hundreds of patients who actually needed the level of medication that physicians were prescribing. but of course that gets brushed off as an, 'aww shucks what an unforseen consequence of max trying to do good.' which, listen, i as a viewer give him the leeway there because frankly that's just the nature of the show but it grinds my gears that lauren can't get an ounce of the same grace.

which, side tangent, i saw someone argue that it's not max's responsibility to fix NA's situation with fuentes before he leaves and that the other core doctors should be finding their own ways to work around fuentes and step up to her. i found that so incredibly frustrating and such a perfect example of how people will bend over backwards to avoid acknowledging max's faults in situations. because think of all the doctors that were resistant to max's changes but had no power to do anything but eventually comply. the opioids scenario is a perfect example. in the episode there was a doctor that vehemently disagreed with max's blanket policy but was forced to go along because max decreed it so or else he'd get fired. he pointedly called out that max's policy was reckless. it's not that easy to go against the medical director who only (theoretically and even so that's debatable bc max's certainly never listened) answers to the board.

anyways, long way to say, fuck the hypocrisy and fuck the lauren bloom haters.

[jangofctts]

(sorry for the format i think but this is loNG WTF IS WRONG W ME ITS INCOHERENT I'M LOCKIN MYSELF UP OFF TO HORNY JAIL I GO) deadass when you nd the boys are days away from being back on coruscant and on shore leave for a minute bc the general got some weird jedi shit to deal with is when u become peak Brat™ like it is so bad even the resident brat fuse can't keep up, the whole squad is screaming, and no one can stop u (yet) like you love teasing the boys but this is next level annoying like lets say max asks u to do something to help him get ready to fuck off for leave and ur just like no💕 i will cause problems on purpose))) he isn't happy and keeps asking while doing other work, realizes he's getting nowhere, and starts w the vague threats “you won’t like what happens if u keep this up” or “you really don't want to do this right now" but u finally do a few things to help before u leave to annoy void bc that man doesn't deal w enough shenanigans apparently...

u help void for a bit but get bored when void is just doing inventory and requisitions asking you how much of this or that nd you start saying "not enough" or "a fuckton" and while he appreciates the honesty it's not helpful but you ask "can't a droid do inventory? they know how to count?" getting a snarky reply of "yeah unlike you" obviously fed up but u continue to annoy him maybe cause mischief w the boys if they're there? maybe get handsy? threaten stupidity? who knows but anything u do is gonna get an exasperated sigh and "i'm gonna tell max about this shit" but what is he gonna do? punish u? [narrator: he, in fact does just that] so this goes on for a while but at some point when you are like 10 hrs out from coruscant max herds u to his quarters but lo and behold it's not bc he needs someone to fix his datapad but bc ur in for the punishment of ur life lol this man must have been planning this since ur first bratty act bc he has a bunch of stuff laid out just for u))) seeing this, u turn on the sad puppy eyes/pouty face and the "but i can be a good girl for u" or "i'm sorry i was just antsy to get back let me make it up to you" but nothing is gonna work now especially when he puts u over his knee.

he's pulling ur pants down over ur ass, revealing ur going commando today and u give him the "whats wrong maxy?" over ur shoulder just before he starts ur punishment isn't he sweet? he only spanks you a few times bc ur real punishment is SO MUCH worse and u realize this when he ties ur hands together over ur head and ties ur ankles together too hmmmmm this was more than u bargained for and u keep pleading with max when he takes his armor and blacks off but he keeps saying "u did this to yourself baby" and that he "can't help now" because "u didn't listen earlier like a good girl" but once he gets situated on the bed u know ur in for it. he grabbed some lube from his drawer and slicked himself up while telling u that "u won't be enjoying this part but i think i will" as he takes a hold of ur legs and lining himself up with not ur entrance but between ur thighs right above ur clit bc surprise! this ass and thigh man is gonna go to town fucking ur thighs while just grazing ur clit every few strokes absolutely working u up but no where near enough to get u off just like he planned. max really does love a good thigh fucking and so do u but he's usually playing with ur clit teasing u until he hits home and fills u up right - this time none of that is happening. u keep whining which just eggs him on more to bully u with "good girls deserve my thick cock but u decided to be a brat hm?" and "brats don't get to cum last time i checked" until he loses his rhythm and shutters as he cums all over ur stomach. he slowly gets out between ur thighs and runs his hands through the mess but ur still whiny so he shushes u with cum slick fingers before he gets up to grab his comlink just leaving the rest to get sticky (so rude)

he calls up void nd hear him say "my hip is acting up could u come look at it later?" with "did ur dumb ass do something again? give me a bit i'll head over" in reply with no idea what is waiting for him when he comes through the door. u have no idea how long it'll b until void comes so u keep trying to plead ur case to max telling him ur "sorry for being annoying and bratty i learned my lesson can i cum now?" but getting a surprising "lets see what void thinks" in return. its at least half an hour until void opens the door to see u tied to max's bed and him hovering over u just taunting and playing with u as he sees fit but honestly at this point nothing can really truly shock void now but this peaked his interest. max tries to explain saying "she was being a br-" "a brat i know i didn't think it would end up like this but" void starts as he takes off his remaining armor and ur begging for SOMETHING since max was so mean not even going near ur pussy (again rude) but thankfully void isn't a sadist (today) and starts teasing u by running his fingers through ur folds, playing with ur clit, and starts opening u up for him.

once he gets u good and wet he starts slowly rocking into u while u keep begging for him to give u permission to cum but he says that "brats don't get to cum they just get used))))" and ur thinkin ur definitely not gonna be cumming anytime soon but this mf just goes straight to pound town w the week/month/whatever he's had and the bratting u've done lol and u start clenching trying to get a rise out of him or get him to say something, ANYTHING but void won't give u the satisfaction of hearing his usual dirty talk, no, this is his version of punishment just letting u hear and feel him fuck u faster as he approaches his orgasm not caring about yours (yet) just feeling u tighten around him until he can't handle it and cums deep inside u just staying there for a minute catching his breath and u think void is done but oh lord no he is very much not lol he unties ur ankles and goes straight for ur pussy eating u out and cleaning up the mess he made inside and out, rutting into the sheets and making u squirm like nothing else maybe max wanders back over to you too and helps him out idk i was just having thots (since everyone is whore knee for wrecker rn i remember sending a wrecker ask a million years ago i can send it again if u want also i have a short fuse thing for u so))))) love being a whore)

ok bye im gonna be checking myself into the fuckin hospital THIS IS PURE GOLD IM

wOw

[baybee45]

A/N: Lieutenant Thire!Reader/"criminal reader"

Anything in italics is your internal dialogue hopefully that is clear but just case it wasn't. Hope you enjoy!

Warnings: PG, unless Star Wars swearing counts, If it does PG-13.

It's pretty fluffy with a a dash of spice.

Our Story

    "Stop right there!" The red and white armored trooper sternly warns. You freeze and slowly turn to face him, his blaster aimed and ready, as you nonchalantly raise your hands. You take the moment to catch your breath and think of a plan.

    "You're very fast sir, ya really must be something under all that armor. Maybe we can settle this with a drink? See where the night takes us?" You coyly ask, edging slowly towards the ledge. The updraft off the building blows strands of your messy hair wildly.

    "Your attempt at flirting isn't going to work with me. I will shoot! Now Stop Moving!"

    You come to a halt partially listening to his warning, but mostly because your heels were already teetering off the ledge of the roof. There was a decent 10 feet between you and jail time. Your mind races through the dwindling option for escape as two other troopers make their way up to the roof. The initial trooper with a pauldron-- that means he is higher rank, a lieutenant or captain maybe, you couldn't remember-- motions to the others and they make their way towards you with binders in hand.

    "I mean I don't even know your name yet sir. And honestly, I've never really been into handcuff but if that's your thing..."

    The troopers blaster waivers slightly and you swear you heard him chuckle as he shakes his helmet nearly imperceptibly. Tilting your own head to the side, you look at him through batting eyelashes and give him a mischievous smile.

    "You know if you shoot me, I'd most likely fall off the side of this building." You sigh. "Not a great ending to our blossoming story."

    "Well, don't move and Our story will continue, uh blossoming on... Lieutenant Thire" He clarifies. You hear a flapping sound, glancing down you see curtains blowing in the funneled wind.

An open window.

"Staying Still? Hmmph, now where's the fun in that Lieutenant!?"

    "Don't you dare! Hurry it along troopers!" He quickly barks. Thire must have seen the the glimmer in your eyes, or maybe the glint of the knife hidden in your sleeve. Giving them all a quick farewell salute, you jump back diving feet first down the side of the apartment.

    "For kriffsake!" You hear Thire yell, as you fly down the side of the building only slowed slightly by your vibroblade slicing into the duracrete. It was truely a beautiful firework display of sparks, flashing this way and that, off the speeding wall. Then with some skill and a lot of luck, you catch the top ledge of the window and swing yourself in.

A slight wobble in the landing, but a solid 9 for the overall execution.

    You try to orient your self in the dark room and then are momentarily blinded when the lights turns on. When your eyes are finally are able to adjust and focus you see a very, very large green Twi'lek. He is blocking you from an easy exit. His tiny human partner cautiously comes up behind him holding a bat.

Great!

    "Good evening folks" you greeted them with the ease of second hand speeder sales man.

    "What in the kriffing hell! What are you doing in here!" yelled the foreboding Twi'lek.

    "What do you mean..." You pretended to be shocked looking to the Twi'lek and then his partner who is still nervervously holding on to the bat.

    "You didn't get a written notice from your land lord?" You questioned and suddenly act as if you just now saw the weapon in her hands. The green giant looked down to his partner and his partner back up at him. Both looked equal and extremely confused.

You can work with this.

    Pulling out your datapad from your bag and start angrily taping the keys, pacing slightly with your back turned to them. "Steve! You son of a bantha! I could throttle you, just kill him!" You fumed to your small audience, trying to quickly put together a holonet site to give the story your weaving some actual weight.

    "I try, You known, to tell him," you said sounding exasperated. "I tell him a partnership takes two people... Two people working as a team." Your two suspicious hosts look to each other and back at you. Still unsure of what to make of this intruder and the verbal diarrhea of new information being spewed at them.

A troubled partnership with someone named Steve. That will be the key out of this situation, the legend that will be Steve and his inability to do his job.

    "When he doesn't do his part I get shafted." You practically wept, still avoiding eye contact with your increasing worried audience. You let out a resigned sigh, rubbing your temples trying collect yourself. Buying enough time for your site to become live. With a relieved but tired inhale you continue your one man show.

    "I'm so sorry, My name is Maree Jakorr" you said thinking of a grade school classmates mother. "And I'm part of a start up security company." You turn your datapad over and show them the holonet site you just put together. Its was barebones but got the job done.

It's Steve for kriffsakes, he can't even call up potential clients, and make sure the tenants are informed. There isn't much hope for his holonet site design abilities.

       You take another deep breathe you were getting a little too deep into lore. "As you can see we do mock break-ins to find weakness and then try implement different measures to increase security and safety. Of course this is supposed to be done with the home owners knowledge and consent." You explain. With a partially exaggerated groan you put away your datapad. "Well this is going to be fun to explain to the CG."

    "The gaurd doesn't have to know" squeaked the human. "I mean we don't need to call them." She said more confidently looking up at her partner. The Twi'lek looked lovely down nodding his head and pulling her in close.

You instantly adore these two, and make a mental note to send them something later for their trouble.

    "Oh you're too sweet hun, but as part of the test we call the CG to see how long it take them to respond to a threat. You know, extra data points for the algorithm, if that makes sense."

"Oh."

    "I'm so sorry for the inconvenience." You say truely apologetic. "Well I guess I should leave you two be, so you can get some resemblence of a normal evening back."

    "Feel free to use the front door... or window if you prefer." Joked the Twi'lek. They both chuckle and she stands on her tip toes giving him a kiss on the cheek.

Gosh these two.

    "I'll try my luck with the front door I think." You laughed. As you hand reaches for the handle, you can hear the sounds of troopers knocking on doors as they sweep the hall. Their footsteps and voices getting louder as they near.

Crap!

    "Do you mind if I use the fresher quickly before I go?"

They both nod their heads and the Twi'lek takes the bat from his partner and puts it away in the closet. "Just that door there at the end of the hallway."

    "Thank you so much, I promise I'll be out of here in no time." You say closing the door behind you, making sure not to lock it. You search the cozy room, looking for an alternative way out. Not to thrilled with the prospect of using window again for escaping. Hopefully it wouldn't be needed, only a options, the last resort, hopefully.

    Depsite the nerf burger, extra fries and large shake you devoured for dinner, you manage to squeeze yourself from the air vent of the apartment and into the slightly larger main vent of the building.

    Without a second to spare you see the troopers through silted grate, knock on the door of the apartment you once occupied. Your tempted to eavsedrop on the conversation, knowing you had given that beautiful couple enough information to give the undoubtedly handsome Lieutenant a headache. You think better of it, and make your long overdue escape.

    Once out of the building you causal walk the back alleyways making your journey home. You send Lieutenant Thire a link and a small message;

"Dear Lieutenant Thire,

I hope this holonet link clears up any misunderstanding between you and the lovely and completely unsuspecting couple in apartment 459.

Sincerely, 'Our story lives on for another day.'

P.S. Please excuse the poorly designed website, Steve did his best. Best regards xox 💋. "

[anne-white-star]

Jon pertwee x reader after the war

Notes: people are in search for jon because he was a spy during the war.

This is based on a dream i had a few nights enjoy 😊

Words: 1087

Warnings : angst  

After the second world war things had finaly calmed down enough to be able to walk over the street savely.

Y/n was making tea when there was frantic knoking at the door, she unlocked it and opend up "hello how can i" but before she could ask her question somone stormt passed her, the person ran up the stairs.

Y/n locked the door and went up in search for the person, y/n went in to her bedroom but she stoped in her tracks when she heard soft crying, she kneeld before the bed and looked under it "jon?"

He stoped crying once he heared his name "Hey y/n..."

"Oh dear whats the matter?"

"They are in search for me"

"Who?"

"Some people who are against us" he snift

"Oh darling why would they be looking for you? "

"Because i worked as a spy remember"

"Hold on i'll be right back ok try to calm a bit down" y/n went down stairs to close all the blinds then she went back up "could you please come from under the bed dear?"

Jon did as he was asked and sat down on the bed

"Lissen jon im not going to let you be taken away from me by them, the have no Idea who i am and what my relation is with you if they come at my door i'll call the police thill then you stay here"

"What did you do down stairs?"

"I closed all the blinds"

"But what if people get suspicious?" He asked afraid

"I'll tell them I got migrains don't worry now" she softly grabed his hand

"Y/n you are an angel" jon huged her close She huged back

"You can stay as long as you need its no problem at al" she stood up and walked to the door and grabed her sunglasses from her dresser "come lets get some tea"

Once down stairs y/n started making tea 

"Tell me jon why are they after you?"

"I betrayed their boss thats why"

"I see, wel i wont let them take you away from me promise, Anyway what do you want for food tonight?"

"Are pancakes alright?"

"Sure why not" she smiled

After tea jon and y/n played some card games, once dinner time had arived they made pancakes together. After dinner y/n and jon went ready for bed

Y/n closed the blinds "Lucky the bed is big enough for two people " she laught softly

"Thanks y/n you are the best " he hugged her and kissed her fourhead 

"Sleep wel jon"

"You to dear"

The next few days werent so special, y/n went out to get food and jon stayed in the house cleaning a bit, one of y/n her nebours went by to ask what was wrong because the blinds had all been closed, y/n Lucky had her sunglasses on to cover it up she replied "I have been suffering from migrains nothig is wrong so her neigbours din't question it anymore

But one morning the door bell rang "jon go hide upstairs" he did as he was told he took the stuf that he had used on the table upstairs, y/n put her sunglasses back on, she opend the door

"Good morning how can I help you?"

"Good morning miss we are looking for somone do you perhaps know him" the one of the 5 men held up a photo of jon

"Oh hmm i have seen him before, Please do come in don't mind the close blinds im suffering from migrains" she led the 5 men to the kitchen "tea anyone?"

"No thank you, but do tell us now have you seen him before"

"Oh yes i went to school with him when i was younger its been about 20 years I think" she rubbed her chin "please do excuse me i need to get my meds from upstairs, she went up quickly

"Jon?" She wispered

"they are here arent they?"

"Yes they are call the police i'll keep them bussy"

"Alright"

Y/n went back down stairs and jon started to call the police "sorry for keeping you all waiting i couldn't find my meds "

"Its alright madam, Do you know where this man lives?"

"I have no idea i said that the last time i saw him was 20 years ago in school"

"Alright" the 5 men stood up "thank you for your time miss"

"Wait are you all sure you don't want something to drink or eat before you leave?"

"No miss thank you"

Then the door bell rang "oh please do excuse me" y/n walked to the door and opend it and was created by 5 police men they went in and arested the other men 

"Whats the meaning of this?!"

You and your friends are under arest for trying to assassinate a person 

"You damn woman it was all your idea wasnt it" the head of the group said angry getting in her face 

"Lissen here you" y/n went up close and looked him straight in the eyes "No one gets between  

Me and my lover because i swear i will hunt you down, you won't be able to hide very far" she smiled but then a dark look came over her face, and then she slapped him acros the face "please be so kind to put them away and i don't ever want to see their face again"

"Of course miss have a Nice day" the men were put in jail and got to serve a long sentence 

"Are they gone?" Jon came down the stairs 

"Yes they are gone nothing to worry about anymore" 

Jon huged y/n "thank you so mutch i just can't thank you enough" he looked her in the eyes and they started to lean in, jon kissed y/n softly on the mouth

"It was nothig" she blushes

"My woman in shining armor" he huged her and then kissed her again 

"Are we a thing now?" She asked softly

"Do you want us to be a thing?"

"Honestly...... god yes"       

He looked down on her "we should open the blinds now that they are gone" 

"Good idea" so they both opend the blinds and sat outside in the garden 

"Im glad this is over i can't thank you enough y/n" 

"It was nothig" they looked at the sky seing the clouds go by   

And then they both knew that everything would be alright for the up coming time and they both had a bright future ahead of them

The end                 

[woozletania]

Sanctuary (RR/GOTG slice of life)

It started one day in the most innocuous way imaginable: nothing more dramatic than an E-mail. "Hey Rock," Quill said, slumped back in the pilot's chair idly scanning the screen as he helped Rocket work on a problem with the Milano. "Got a letter from your doctor friend." "Those're always good," Rocket replied, his head and body down to the armpits inside a panel working on control connections.  "Try the upper right aileron control." Star-Lord obediently pressed a control and Rocket made a happy noise from inside the console, his ringed tail twitching in not-quite-a-wag.  Peter went on. "Weird thing is the subject line is public but the body is locked, or I'd read it to you. All I can see is 'P. Foster' and 'It's happening again'." There was a dull bang from inside the console as Rocket's tail went stiff. Peter watched curiously as a hand appeared, set down a wrench.  Rocket's voice was deadly calm. "Read that again, Pete." "'It's happening again.' That's all I can read, man." "Oh.  Okay then." The hand grabbed the wrench and Rocket worked briefly, then slid back into view.  As usual he was covered with dust and smears of grease but a spot of bloody fur over one eye showed where he'd hit his head.  "That'll hold it.  I gotta hit the can." Gamora came up the stairs just as Rocket went down and the little raccoon pushed past her with even worse manners than usual. The green-skinned assassin took one look at the open panel and discarded tools the raccoon left in his wake and came to the obvious conclusion.  "In the middle of something?  Mantis has lunch ready." "I guess.". Peter fiddled with the controls, watching the indicators as he tried the various control surfaces, thrusters and engines.  "Looks like it's all working. Figure Rocket will want to work on it more though, he doesn't leave his personal tool kit just lying where everyone can get at it unless he's in the middle of something." But Rocket didn't show up at lunch and didn't answer when Mantis knocked on his door.  Weirdly enough he'd even locked Groot out and the tree, a little taller than the raccoon now and going through early teenage crankiness, spent two minutes banging on the door until Rocket finally swore and opened it. "What? I was just doin' some stuff." Groot handed him back his tools, which got a grunt of something like 'thanks' from the raccoon, who then finally emerged and locked the door behind him. Drax happened by just then and the three made their way to the common area for a belated lunch. Peter, Gamora and Mantis were all there around the table and Mantis reached out without thinking to pet Rocket, seeing from the angle of his ears that he was in a bad mood.  Rocket was a lot more likely to let someone pet him these days but this time he flinched away and sat by himself, grabbing one of the sandwiches from the platter without a word. Seeing Rocket in a bad mood was nothing new but he was usually nicer to Mantis than this and Peter spoke up.  "Was that letter bad news, Rock?" "Oh that," Rocket grunted between bites.  "Not really. He did say he met another guy who's up on my model of cybernetics and that I should have him take a quick look next time I'm in the area.  So I wanna swing by Kopleth today, since we're between money runs." "Kopleth?  Dull place, but I guess," Peter said.  There was nothing but the sound of munching and Drax loudly slurping soup after that until Rocket finished eating. The second the door to his room closed, though, the conversation started up again. "You don't believe him, do you?" Said Gamora. "Not for a second," Quill replied. "I am Groot," said the sapling. "Yes," rumbled Drax.  "He had his weapons out and a bag of bombs half packed when I saw into his room for a moment.  Whatever he's going to Kopleth for, it is not to see a doctor." Gamora's smart pad beeped, and she read the message before turning the screen so the others could see.  It was from Nebula. 'Not supposed to tell you this, but he's in your crew.  Rocket just asked me to help him kill some people.  Something going on I should know about?' Rocket should have known that on a ship this small it was impossible to keep secrets.  Perhaps he did, because when they arrived on Kopleth and he made his way down the docking ramp, bag-full-o-guns over his shoulder, it was an expression of resignation more than anything else that crossed his face when he found his friends waiting at the bottom. "Before you say anything," he said.  "This isn't anything you want to be a part of. It's personal business." Gamora held up her smart pad once more.  'If you are reading this I am dead, on the run or in jail. The bounty on me will be huge if it's the middle one, so I'll understand if you come after me. It was something I had to do. No apologies.' Rocket groaned.  "That was supposed to be time locked until tomorrow." "Not when I know to look," Gamora said.  "And I knew something was going on." "Yes," said Nebula as she stepped off her ship.  "What is going on, fox?" "It's happening again," Rocket said a little later in the Milano's common area.  "I can't let it happen again. Never again." "What's going on, buddy?" Rocket sat with his ears down and his little clawed hands between his knees. He counted the grenades on his belt, twice, before continuing.  "Doc Foster got a job offer.  They knew he worked at Halfworld and gave him a virtual tour of the new facility.  Animal Uplift.  Cybernetic implants.  Vivisection. Euthanizing the subjects when they were done.  Somehow they had data files from the Halfworld complex. There must have been a backup elsewhere and now it's all happening again." There were no tears in the raccoon's eyes. Just determination. "If I have to spend the rest of my life in a cell to stop this, I'll do it. Every one of these bastards has to die. But research like this is legal on Kopleth. I'm going, but the rest of you oughta get out of here now. 'Cept maybe the lady who already has a giant bounty on her bald head," he said, nodding to Nebula. "You're not going, buddy," Star-Lord said.  "Not without me." "There will be heavy security, yes?" Drax asked, and Rocket nodded.  "Then I will not be left out of a good fight." "And if my sister goes, I go," said Gamora.  Nebula just smiled. "You don't get it," Rocket said.  "We spent the last year building up a reputation. This could destroy it.  If it's just me you can say I was a rogue. I'm expendable." "No," Gamora said, and everyone (except maybe Nebula) said together, "You aren't." Rocket sighed.  Not surprised, just a little sad.  Peter spoke up next.  "So you got a plan, little buddy?" "'Course I got a plan," Rocket mumbled.  "Always got a plan." "One that involves all of us, not just you?" "Told you," Rocket said with the beginning of a smile.  "I always got a plan." And that's why it was that Drax, armed with a missile launcher of Rocket's own design, Gamora with her plasma rifle and Quill with his pistols stormed the front of the complex to draw attention away from the back, while Rocket, Rocket-sized Groot and Nebula, whose cybernetics made her eerily flexible, entered via the ductwork Rocket had identified from the schematics he'd studied. Some of the vents were too small for even Nebula and so they soon separated with a whispered "Kill only when necessary," for Rocket eventually allowed himself to be reminded that not everyone they encountered would be a monster. Yet the first thing he did was drop out of an air vent onto the shoulders of a Xandarian who was cutting open a black-furred creature, dig his claws into the man's throat and rip it out. "Nod if you understand," he whispered, undoing the furry thing's restraints even as the researcher toppled over. It nodded, and Rocket slapped an emergency medical patch over the hole the "doctor" had put in the long-eared creature and gestured for it to follow him. There was a thump against the wall nearby, probably Nebula shattering some fool's skull, and a black-clad security guard popped through a door only to get a chest full of Rocket's hand-made APX - Armor Piercing Explosive - rounds. The next room had nothing but a few empty cages and bloodstained operating tables, though Rocket reflexively pocketed a handful of servo components from a table. Distant shouts and gunfire meant the other Guardians were fighting their way in and this place clearly wasn't built and staffed to withstand a major assault, which was just what you got when Gamora and Drax led an attack. "I am Groot?" The black-furred test subject jumped when a three-foot-tree man man his appearance but Rocket just smiled.  "Yeah, can you get that door?". He'd been about to blast the armored portal but Groot's strength was all out of proportion to his size and his tendrils ripped the thing from its hinges. "Jackpot!" Cages, test subjects - and a couple of guards.  Rocket got one before they recovered from the sudden disappearance of the armored door and speed and small size gave him the advantage he needed to take out the other. "Get 'em out, get 'em out!" He blew away what he recognized as a cybernetics jammer mounted just outside the row of cages and Groot ripped the door off the nearest just as a white-jacketed researcher appeared.  Rocket hesitated to shoot an unarmed man and thus made a mistake that would make him wake staring at the ceiling and shaking for years afterward. The man didn't need a gun to smash his hand into a panic button and the result was clouds of green poison gas spraying from nozzles on the ceiling. "Shit!  Hurry!" The furthest cages were already out of sight in a cloud of poison, as was the researcher, and Rocket resorted to shooting the locks off the cages he could still see.  Half shaved, cybernetic implant-studded animals of several unfamiliar species  leapt out and ran for the door and Rocket cursed as he shot the lock off a cage that held a shivering yellow-furred creature curled in a ball as far away from the bars as it could get. He had already breathed more of the green gas than he liked and all he could do was grab the thing and yank it out of the cage. Mistake.  He should have known it would panic and with an animalistic shriek the long, flexible yellow creature wrapped around him like a snake and sank sharp fangs into his neck. The spray of red told him he was in real trouble but Rocket was no stranger to pain and he grabbed a gas-added creature from another cage and staggered for the door, weighed down by two of them and passing the handheld one off to Groot as he made it through the doorway and slammed it shut. Everything still alive in that room wouldn't be that way for long and he wasn't doing so good either. The whiskery muzzle was still clamped down on the side of his neck and Groot had to help him run the few dozen yards to daylight. What he saw when he burst into the light astonished him.  Not just the Guardians but hovering Nova fighters, not to mention ground troops who had rounded up a dozen white-coated researchers and were similarly trying to keep track of at least that many research animals.  His keen ears picked up the argument going on between a Nova officer - he recognized Dey - and what must be the head researcher.  "No authority here - research animals, perfectly legal," and something about "Murderous thugs." Rocket ignored the blood running down his chest, got his fingers into the scruff of the yellow thing slowly killing him with its bite and whispered, "Listen - all of you Subjects, listen, say this -" "Rocket!" Quill came running as Rocket's vision began to gray around the edges, blood loss and gas, and Gamora right behind him. No sign of Nebula of course, she'd wisely taken a powder. Just then the yellow thing's fangs came out of his neck and it said, slowly and clearly to the nearest Nova corpsman: "In accordance with the Uniform Sapience Act -" "No!" The head researcher tried to intervene, only for Drax to clothesline him to the ground. "I request sanctuary on the basis of inhumane treatment," the yellow thing said, and the other animals repeated "Sanctuary, sanctuary," and the less Uplifted  or vocal ones spitting out the syllables the way he used to, "sanct-u-ary," And then Rocket was falling over, weighed down by the yellow thing and never so happy in his life to hear one word.  It'd all been worth it.  Live or die, it was so worth it. ***** 'So, not dead,' were Rocket's first thoughts when he woke.  His neck hurt, his chest hurt, and oddly enough his leg hurt too. And the second thing that passed through his mind when he opened his eyes was how familiar the metal ceiling looked. "Why am I not in jail," he mused, and Peter jerked upright in the chair next to the bunk, dropping the Zune headphones he'd been tinkering with. A strange animal chirp came from low down, out of his range of vision, but it hurt to turn his neck so he couldn't see what made it. "Rocket!  Hey, everybody, he's awake!" In an instant the room was crowded with the crew, and even Nebula, and Rocket realized he was in Peter's quarters on board the Milano. The captain's cabin, if you could call it that, was about fifteen percent larger than the space he had before he turned it into a lifeboat and started sleeping in his round padded bed. "I have lots of questions," Rocket said, and then there was another, because a sleek yellow head sporting long, familiar whiskers popped into view as well. He'd never gotten a good look at it but this was indisputably the creature that nearly killed him.  He was too tired and sore to hold that against her.  "I guess they all fall under 'what happened'." "Peter had an idea," Gamora said, and Mantis smiled as she gently scratched Rocket's ears.  "A good one, for a change." "Thanks Gamora," Pete said sourly.  "I called Nova Corps before we went to the compound to see if I could get them to look the other way for a little while as we took off for our new outlaw lives.  When I explained what was going on to Dey he said the following," with that he pointed at Drax. "Animal research is legal in many places," the giant intoned.  "But as far as Nova is concerned, Uplift, or at least the abuse of the resulting sapients is legal nowhere." Peter grinned. "Since Kopleth has no military to speak of they couldn't do much when a Nova troop transport and escorts showed up. Even medics who patched you up, though it was a near thing. You had nerve gas in your system, a nicked artery in your neck and a splinter from a ricochet or something in your calf below the armor." "So we're not outlaws," Rocket said wonderingly.  "What about the research subjects?" "Under Nova supervision," Gamora said.  "To be granted full sapient rights and a share of the penalty fines being assessed against the company.  And we get a share of that too." "Free money!" Pete cheered.  "A reward for just doing good things!" "What about her?" Rocket looked at the whiskery creature, seeing the bolts almost concealed by her fur where the artificial collarbones lay.  He had bolts like that, too. "Her?" Pete looked puzzled.  "You mean 96L02?" "Subject Nine-Six-Lima-Zero-Two reports as ordered, sir," the creature said, and stood up as straight as its long cylindrical body allowed. Rocket winced. "Damn it Pete, you know better than that.  That's not a name and she - yeah, you bald bodies have no noses I know but she is a she - is conditioned to respond to that number.  I don't want to hear one of you say it again. Ever." He reached over to see how she would react, careful not to touch, and webbed hands/forepaws clasped his fingers.  "Rocket," she chirped.  "So so-ree I bit you." "I woulda done the same thing," Rocket said.  "Ask Pete. He got the scars to prove it.  Now we need to get you a name." She stood bolt upright. "Subject Nine-Six-Lima-" "No!" She shrank back, her little low-set ears sinking.  "That was what they called you. You don't belong to them now.  You can have any name you want." "But I don't have a name," she chirped. Do you know the names of the researchers?" "Rocket," Peter said firmly.  "You are not naming her after guys you killed to get her out." "Hey, it worked for me.  And I only killed four anyway." "I am Groot." "That guy killed himself," Rocket said, and that brought back bad memories.  "How many got out?  Test subjects that is." "Thirteen," Gamora said, "But one died from gas exposure. Before you ask, including the one in the operating room there were twenty-six in various stages of Uplift." Rocket swore, but Peter cut him off.  "Subject-" and the yellow creature stood bolt upright, "Er, Lima told us what happened.  Rocket, I was the one who told you not to shoot people who weren't a threat. It's my fault.  And if we'd all gone in the front, which was my plan, they would have gassed them all.  Your plan got some of them out and would have got them all out if you hadn't listened to me. So blame me, not yourself." "It's all right," Rocket grunted.  "I woulda hesitated anyway.  Didn't think a guy would kill himself just to get rid of some Subjects." Lima stood bolt upright at the word. "Why is she doing that, Rock?  You don't do that when people say 89P-" Rocket let out an inarticulate growl and Pete stopped. "Oh yeah, you killed all the people who called you that." "Except Doc Foster," but then Lima was gripping his clawed hand again in her webby ones. "Why are you so angry, Rocket," she chirped, and Pete smothered a laugh. "'Cause I was made to be angry. To be a weapon.  You don't have to be like me, Lima." "I'm not," she said immediately.  "I am for linguistics, and diplomacy, and companionship. I am to be cute." And with her whiskers and ink-dark eyes she certainly was. "No! You don't gotta be what they made you.  You can be whatever you want." "I don't know what I want to be," she chirped, and Rocket smiled sadly. "Welcome to the club, lady." One by one the others wished him goodnight and left for their beds, for it was very late indeed.  He'd apparently been granted Peter's cabin until he recovered, though he protested that he didn't need anywhere near that much space. "You're in no shape to curl up to sleep," Peter said.  "You need a real bed." I've got a real bed, and it's round, Rocket thought but did not say. That brought it to mind when Lima dropped down to all fours and curled up on a wadded-up blanket. "Groot," Rocket mumbled, and then spoke up despite his sore chest. "Groot!" "I am Groot?"  Naturally, the tree had been resting right outside the door.  He wasn't going anywhere until he was sure Rocket was fully recovered. "Get my bed, please." "I am Groot?" "No, it's not for me. Pete will yell at me if he has to sleep on a bunk and I don't use the bed he's lent me. And yeah, I'm too sore to curl up.  But look," Rocket said, and gestured at Lima. "I am Groot." "Thanks, pal." A moment later the tree was back with the round, padded bed, the one embroidered with "Rocket" and the Ravager symbol. Rocket knew perfectly well it was a pet bed Pete picked up on Earth but Pete never lorded that over him (which showed he had an active survival instinct) and the thing was damn comfortable. "Lima."  The yellow creature - Rocket was sure there was a species name for her, but he had no idea what it was except that she was clearly designed for an aquatic life - popped her head up out of the nest of blankets. "Use this.  It's comfy." She slithered out of the blankets on her short web-footed legs and gave it a sniff. "It smells like you, Rocket." "Yeah, I sleep in it, but you need it more than I do right now." "Are you sure?" "Yeah." Rocket smiled as she curled up in a ball in the padded bed, just as he did.  She was long and sinuous compared to his more humanoid build, but she still fit perfectly into the thing. There was a time he and Groot shared the thing every night, but Groot was too big now.  That had taken a lot of getting used to.  For years he'd slept in leafy beds Groot grew each night, then he and mini-Groot shared various beds, and then ultimately it was just Rocket, and now it was just Lima, or whatever her name would eventually be. "Good night, Lima.  Tomorrow we'll talk about your name." And that would have been the end of it, except that later, when the ship lights were turned down to a dim glow, Rocket was woken by a familiar sound.  A nervous chattering, whining, and the sound of claws on fabric. Lima was in the midst of a nightmare.  He'd heard all these sounds before from himself, and heard them described to him. She twitched in the round bed, and whined, and he had all too good an idea of what she was dreaming about. He'd always been the one to wake screaming, or shivering. Peter had the occasional nightmare, and with good reason, but he was stronger than Rocket.  Or maybe his nightmares didn't involve being strapped down and cut open.  Rocket didn't know what Pete had nightmares about.  Ego? The Ravagers?  His mother dying?  Yondu? He did know how Pete had helped him with his own night terrors, though. Rocket winced as he sat up, and using the cabin chair as a stepping stool (not something he'd normally need) finally made it to the floor.  He was tough, he healed fast, but the nerve gas had really done a number on him.  Stapled-up wounds in neck and leg didn't hurt half as much as his chest but he dropped to all fours and padded over to the round bed an its occupant. Peter, much larger than himself, had just petted him or rubbed his back to get him to relax.  Lima was as big as he was, though, and the only way he could see to make her feel safe was to crawl into the round bed and snuggle up next to her. She moved in her sleep and soon her whiskery muzzle rested on his shoulder next to his own. Bit by bit she shifted and he moved with her until they were curled up together.  If it weren't for their dramatically different fur colors and body shapes it'd be hard to tell where one ended and the other began. By the time they were snuggled up together she had relaxed, the shivering tension gone from her muscles and her breathing slow and relaxed. 'What I should do now is wriggle out of here and bed back on the bed,' Rocket thought.  But he was tired, and sore, and there was something about lying here snuggled up with another furry creature. 'Safe,' Rocket thought as he drifted off to sleep.  'I feel safe.  I hope she does too.'

[raphianna]

if big hero 6 had a gag reel, part two

Yama: Prepare your bot, Zero. *makes a loud fart*

Everyone: *stares at him*

Hiro: I'm sure no one was prepared for that, though.

------

Hiro: There's a fight across town; if I bolt, I can still make it!

Tadashi: *tries to pull back Hiro by the hoodie, but ends up tearing away part of his hoodie instead and Hiro trips facefirst forwards*

Hiro: Y-you owe me a new hoodie, you bonehead--

------

Hiro: *in his own jail cell, looks up and waves at Tadashi*

Tadashi: *glares at him from an opposite jail cell, sees Hiro laughing and breaks character* Hold on, what's so funny--

Everyone: *makes stupid faces behind Tadashi and then break out into laughter*

------

Baymax: *tries to cross the street with the microbot but a speeding motorcycle crashes into him; the nursebot then flies off-camera*

-------

Baymax: *after Hiro puts on his first armor* I have some concerns. *bits of his armor then wobble and then fly off, hitting Hiro and then the camera and the rest of the crew*

Director: *gets hit by Baymax's helmet* C-cut...

-------

Baymax and Hiro: *while flying across the bridge in their test flight, Baymax fails to swoop up and ends up hitting a truck*

-------

Yokai: *hurls huge metal container at the team*

Wasabi: *tries to scream but can't because his voice has gotten too hoarse*

Honey: This is what happens when you want to redo your scream fifteen times...

-------

Tadashi: *during the test videos* I-it worked! Oh, this is amazing-- *tries to kiss the screen but gets too eager and instead headbutts Baymax and falls back, hitting his head on a toolbox*

--------

Baymax: My programming prevents me from injuring another human being.

Hiro: Not anymore. *grabs Tadashi's chip and tosses it aside, but instead hits the camera and breaks it*

Callaghan: Umm, Hiro, you were supposed to go after me, not the cameraman.

---------

Tadashi and Hiro: *opens up a bin containing the microbots but gets a huge surprise when Krei pops out, taking them both by surprise*

Krei: Oh my god, you should have seen your faces--*sees the cameras around them* Oh, are we filming right now?

Tadashi: *slams the lid of the bin down on his head* Yes, we are.

----------

Hiro: I'm on a roll, big brother, and there is no stopping me!

Tadashi: H-hold on, I think the brakes on this moped are broken--

Hiro: Wait, what? But we're supposed to slow down right about--

Hiro and Tadashi: *crashes into the police car and is sent flying off-screen*

Tadashi: ...Great, now we're going to be arrested FOR REAL this time.

---------

Hiro: *when confronting Callaghan, who has Krei captured* Let him go!

Callaghan: *narrows eyes* Fine! *tosses Krei off-screen, with Krei screaming like a little girl* Oh, wait, was I supposed to not let him go?

Krei: S-seriously, was that you getting back at me for flooding your trailer, Cal?

Hiro: *facepalms* Unbelievable, these two.

---------

Hiro: *has fallen and is stuck between his bed and his desk*

Baymax: It is all right to cry. *leans forward and tries to grab Hiro out of there, but is struggling*

Hiro: O-oh no, I'm stuck for real this time, aren't I?

Baymax: *stands back up* I'm afraid you can cry all you want this time, Hiro. I can't get you out of there.

--------

Honey: *grabs a chem ball from her purse when she's first trying out her gear; she holds it up and the ball explodes in her face*

Hiro: *doubles back, stunned but then laughing about it* At least your gear works, right, Honey?

---------

Wasabi: *slashing away at microbots when his blades comes loose and flies off, he then stops and instead bumps facefirst into a column of microbots* T-that wasn't so cool, I'm sorry...can we do that again?

----------

Tadashi: *puts duct tape on Hiro's arm*

Hiro: Hate to break it to you, bro, but already been invented.

Tadashi: *tries to pull off the tape, but can't* Oh, we might have a problem*

Hiro: *narrows eyes* What kind of tape was that...?

Tadashi: Oh, don't worry, Hiro, I can fix this... *tries pulling off the tape some more, and when it comes off, he falls back off-camera*

Hiro and Tadashi: O-OUCH!

Baymax: *inflates* Hello, I am Baymax, your personal healthcare companion. Now which patient should I take care of first?

----------

Hiro: *while running from the microbots in the warehouse, he runs into a pipe with a loud clanging sound and falls on his back*

Baymax: *stops*

Microbots: *stops and recoils back*

Hiro: N-now would be a good time to be a nursebot, B-Baymax...

----------

Hiro: But Baymax can handle that guy!

Baymax: *is tossed back by Yokai but hits the windshield of Wasabi's car instead of its roof*

Everyone: *crushed under Baymax's weight* O-oh no...

-----------

Fred: My name is Fred, and it's been thirty days since my last--HOLY MOTHERF--------

Gogo: Dude, you can't swear in a Disney movie. *looks into camera* You should hear him offscreen, it's worse.

------------

Honey: *takes a pic of Yokai, camera flashes*

Yokai: *stops and strikes a pose, laughing*

-------------

Krei: Those setbacks made us stronger, and set us on a path to a bright-- *accidentally splashes himself in the face with champagne*

Callaghan: *offscreen, laughing like a maniac* Are you kidding me, Alistair?

-------------

Cass: Yeah, wiiiiiiiings--*is too enthusiastic with what she's doing and accidentally tosses the bowl of wings towards the camera*

Director: What a waste of good wings, too...

-------------

Fred: The man in the mask who attacked us is none other than--

Fred's TV: *flashes a video of Fred singing in the shower instead*

Everyone else: *breaks out into laughter*

Fred: What? *looks at screen* Oh my f-----!

---------------

Wasabi: Fred, I was laser hand you in the f--*accidentally activates his blades, now pointed so close to Fred*

Fred: OH GOD WASABI I WAS JUST FOOLING AROUND--

Wasabi: Sorry, sorry! Didn't mean to do that--!

----------------

Gogo: THERE ARE NO RED LIGHTS IN A C--*voice breaks*

Wasabi: *holds back laughter*

Gogo: One word out of you, I swear--

-----------------

Callaghan: Was my daughter a set--*stops, tries not to laugh at Krei making funny faces at him* DAMN IT KREI, WE'RE FILMING!

Krei: *stops* Oh, we are?

Hiro and the team: *offscreen, all facepalming*

------------------

Baymax: *in his armor, kicks the warehouse's door down*

Hiro: *pops out behind him* Get him, Baymax--huh?

The rest of the cast and crew: *lights flicker on inside the warehouse* Surprise! Happy birthday, Hiro!

-----------------

Everyone: *throwing a rave party inside the Lucky Cat Cafe when they should be filming the scene after Tadashi's funeral*

Hiro and Tadashi: *on top of the stairs, dancing like idiots*

Tadashi: This is so much better than having me dead for the rest of the film!

XDDDDD 😂😂😂😂

[annmaru]

if big hero 6 had a gag reel, part two

Yama: Prepare your bot, Zero. *makes a loud fart*

Everyone: *stares at him*

Hiro: I'm sure no one was prepared for that, though.

------

Hiro: There's a fight across town; if I bolt, I can still make it!

Tadashi: *tries to pull back Hiro by the hoodie, but ends up tearing away part of his hoodie instead and Hiro trips facefirst forwards*

Hiro: Y-you owe me a new hoodie, you bonehead--

------

Hiro: *in his own jail cell, looks up and waves at Tadashi*

Tadashi: *glares at him from an opposite jail cell, sees Hiro laughing and breaks character* Hold on, what's so funny--

Everyone: *makes stupid faces behind Tadashi and then break out into laughter*

------

Baymax: *tries to cross the street with the microbot but a speeding motorcycle crashes into him; the nursebot then flies off-camera*

-------

Baymax: *after Hiro puts on his first armor* I have some concerns. *bits of his armor then wobble and then fly off, hitting Hiro and then the camera and the rest of the crew*

Director: *gets hit by Baymax's helmet* C-cut...

-------

Baymax and Hiro: *while flying across the bridge in their test flight, Baymax fails to swoop up and ends up hitting a truck*

-------

Yokai: *hurls huge metal container at the team*

Wasabi: *tries to scream but can't because his voice has gotten too hoarse*

Honey: This is what happens when you want to redo your scream fifteen times...

-------

Tadashi: *during the test videos* I-it worked! Oh, this is amazing-- *tries to kiss the screen but gets too eager and instead headbutts Baymax and falls back, hitting his head on a toolbox*

--------

Baymax: My programming prevents me from injuring another human being.

Hiro: Not anymore. *grabs Tadashi's chip and tosses it aside, but instead hits the camera and breaks it*

Callaghan: Umm, Hiro, you were supposed to go after me, not the cameraman.

---------

Tadashi and Hiro: *opens up a bin containing the microbots but gets a huge surprise when Krei pops out, taking them both by surprise*

Krei: Oh my god, you should have seen your faces--*sees the cameras around them* Oh, are we filming right now?

Tadashi: *slams the lid of the bin down on his head* Yes, we are.

----------

Hiro: I'm on a roll, big brother, and there is no stopping me!

Tadashi: H-hold on, I think the brakes on this moped are broken--

Hiro: Wait, what? But we're supposed to slow down right about--

Hiro and Tadashi: *crashes into the police car and is sent flying off-screen*

Tadashi: ...Great, now we're going to be arrested FOR REAL this time.

---------

Hiro: *when confronting Callaghan, who has Krei captured* Let him go!

Callaghan: *narrows eyes* Fine! *tosses Krei off-screen, with Krei screaming like a little girl* Oh, wait, was I supposed to not let him go?

Krei: S-seriously, was that you getting back at me for flooding your trailer, Cal?

Hiro: *facepalms* Unbelievable, these two.

---------

Hiro: *has fallen and is stuck between his bed and his desk*

Baymax: It is all right to cry. *leans forward and tries to grab Hiro out of there, but is struggling*

Hiro: O-oh no, I'm stuck for real this time, aren't I?

Baymax: *stands back up* I'm afraid you can cry all you want this time, Hiro. I can't get you out of there.

--------

Honey: *grabs a chem ball from her purse when she's first trying out her gear; she holds it up and the ball explodes in her face*

Hiro: *doubles back, stunned but then laughing about it* At least your gear works, right, Honey?

---------

Wasabi: *slashing away at microbots when his blades comes loose and flies off, he then stops and instead bumps facefirst into a column of microbots* T-that wasn't so cool, I'm sorry...can we do that again?

----------

Tadashi: *puts duct tape on Hiro's arm*

Hiro: Hate to break it to you, bro, but already been invented.

Tadashi: *tries to pull off the tape, but can't* Oh, we might have a problem*

Hiro: *narrows eyes* What kind of tape was that...?

Tadashi: Oh, don't worry, Hiro, I can fix this... *tries pulling off the tape some more, and when it comes off, he falls back off-camera*

Hiro and Tadashi: O-OUCH!

Baymax: *inflates* Hello, I am Baymax, your personal healthcare companion. Now which patient should I take care of first?

----------

Hiro: *while running from the microbots in the warehouse, he runs into a pipe with a loud clanging sound and falls on his back*

Baymax: *stops*

Microbots: *stops and recoils back*

Hiro: N-now would be a good time to be a nursebot, B-Baymax...

----------

Hiro: But Baymax can handle that guy!

Baymax: *is tossed back by Yokai but hits the windshield of Wasabi's car instead of its roof*

Everyone: *crushed under Baymax's weight* O-oh no...

-----------

Fred: My name is Fred, and it's been thirty days since my last--HOLY MOTHERF--------

Gogo: Dude, you can't swear in a Disney movie. *looks into camera* You should hear him offscreen, it's worse.

------------

Honey: *takes a pic of Yokai, camera flashes*

Yokai: *stops and strikes a pose, laughing*

-------------

Krei: Those setbacks made us stronger, and set us on a path to a bright-- *accidentally splashes himself in the face with champagne*

Callaghan: *offscreen, laughing like a maniac* Are you kidding me, Alistair?

-------------

Cass: Yeah, wiiiiiiiings--*is too enthusiastic with what she's doing and accidentally tosses the bowl of wings towards the camera*

Director: What a waste of good wings, too...

-------------

Fred: The man in the mask who attacked us is none other than--

Fred's TV: *flashes a video of Fred singing in the shower instead*

Everyone else: *breaks out into laughter*

Fred: What? *looks at screen* Oh my f-----!

---------------

Wasabi: Fred, I was laser hand you in the f--*accidentally activates his blades, now pointed so close to Fred*

Fred: OH GOD WASABI I WAS JUST FOOLING AROUND--

Wasabi: Sorry, sorry! Didn't mean to do that--!

----------------

Gogo: THERE ARE NO RED LIGHTS IN A C--*voice breaks*

Wasabi: *holds back laughter*

Gogo: One word out of you, I swear--

-----------------

Callaghan: Was my daughter a set--*stops, tries not to laugh at Krei making funny faces at him* DAMN IT KREI, WE'RE FILMING!

Krei: *stops* Oh, we are?

Hiro and the team: *offscreen, all facepalming*

------------------

Baymax: *in his armor, kicks the warehouse's door down*

Hiro: *pops out behind him* Get him, Baymax--huh?

The rest of the cast and crew: *lights flicker on inside the warehouse* Surprise! Happy birthday, Hiro!

-----------------

Everyone: *throwing a rave party inside the Lucky Cat Cafe when they should be filming the scene after Tadashi's funeral*

Hiro and Tadashi: *on top of the stairs, dancing like idiots*

Tadashi: This is so much better than having me dead for the rest of the film!

[randomcartoonbro]

if big hero 6 had a gag reel, part two

Yama: Prepare your bot, Zero. *makes a loud fart*

Everyone: *stares at him*

Hiro: I'm sure no one was prepared for that, though.

------

Hiro: There's a fight across town; if I bolt, I can still make it!

Tadashi: *tries to pull back Hiro by the hoodie, but ends up tearing away part of his hoodie instead and Hiro trips facefirst forwards*

Hiro: Y-you owe me a new hoodie, you bonehead--

------

Hiro: *in his own jail cell, looks up and waves at Tadashi*

Tadashi: *glares at him from an opposite jail cell, sees Hiro laughing and breaks character* Hold on, what's so funny--

Everyone: *makes stupid faces behind Tadashi and then break out into laughter*

------

Baymax: *tries to cross the street with the microbot but a speeding motorcycle crashes into him; the nursebot then flies off-camera*

-------

Baymax: *after Hiro puts on his first armor* I have some concerns. *bits of his armor then wobble and then fly off, hitting Hiro and then the camera and the rest of the crew*

Director: *gets hit by Baymax's helmet* C-cut...

-------

Baymax and Hiro: *while flying across the bridge in their test flight, Baymax fails to swoop up and ends up hitting a truck*

-------

Yokai: *hurls huge metal container at the team*

Wasabi: *tries to scream but can't because his voice has gotten too hoarse*

Honey: This is what happens when you want to redo your scream fifteen times...

-------

Tadashi: *during the test videos* I-it worked! Oh, this is amazing-- *tries to kiss the screen but gets too eager and instead headbutts Baymax and falls back, hitting his head on a toolbox*

--------

Baymax: My programming prevents me from injuring another human being.

Hiro: Not anymore. *grabs Tadashi's chip and tosses it aside, but instead hits the camera and breaks it*

Callaghan: Umm, Hiro, you were supposed to go after me, not the cameraman.

---------

Tadashi and Hiro: *opens up a bin containing the microbots but gets a huge surprise when Krei pops out, taking them both by surprise*

Krei: Oh my god, you should have seen your faces--*sees the cameras around them* Oh, are we filming right now?

Tadashi: *slams the lid of the bin down on his head* Yes, we are.

----------

Hiro: I'm on a roll, big brother, and there is no stopping me!

Tadashi: H-hold on, I think the brakes on this moped are broken--

Hiro: Wait, what? But we're supposed to slow down right about--

Hiro and Tadashi: *crashes into the police car and is sent flying off-screen*

Tadashi: ...Great, now we're going to be arrested FOR REAL this time.

---------

Hiro: *when confronting Callaghan, who has Krei captured* Let him go!

Callaghan: *narrows eyes* Fine! *tosses Krei off-screen, with Krei screaming like a little girl* Oh, wait, was I supposed to not let him go?

Krei: S-seriously, was that you getting back at me for flooding your trailer, Cal?

Hiro: *facepalms* Unbelievable, these two.

---------

Hiro: *has fallen and is stuck between his bed and his desk*

Baymax: It is all right to cry. *leans forward and tries to grab Hiro out of there, but is struggling*

Hiro: O-oh no, I'm stuck for real this time, aren't I?

Baymax: *stands back up* I'm afraid you can cry all you want this time, Hiro. I can't get you out of there.

--------

Honey: *grabs a chem ball from her purse when she's first trying out her gear; she holds it up and the ball explodes in her face*

Hiro: *doubles back, stunned but then laughing about it* At least your gear works, right, Honey?

---------

Wasabi: *slashing away at microbots when his blades comes loose and flies off, he then stops and instead bumps facefirst into a column of microbots* T-that wasn't so cool, I'm sorry...can we do that again?

----------

Tadashi: *puts duct tape on Hiro's arm*

Hiro: Hate to break it to you, bro, but already been invented.

Tadashi: *tries to pull off the tape, but can't* Oh, we might have a problem*

Hiro: *narrows eyes* What kind of tape was that...?

Tadashi: Oh, don't worry, Hiro, I can fix this... *tries pulling off the tape some more, and when it comes off, he falls back off-camera*

Hiro and Tadashi: O-OUCH!

Baymax: *inflates* Hello, I am Baymax, your personal healthcare companion. Now which patient should I take care of first?

----------

Hiro: *while running from the microbots in the warehouse, he runs into a pipe with a loud clanging sound and falls on his back*

Baymax: *stops*

Microbots: *stops and recoils back*

Hiro: N-now would be a good time to be a nursebot, B-Baymax...

----------

Hiro: But Baymax can handle that guy!

Baymax: *is tossed back by Yokai but hits the windshield of Wasabi's car instead of its roof*

Everyone: *crushed under Baymax's weight* O-oh no...

-----------

Fred: My name is Fred, and it's been thirty days since my last--HOLY MOTHERF--------

Gogo: Dude, you can't swear in a Disney movie. *looks into camera* You should hear him offscreen, it's worse.

------------

Honey: *takes a pic of Yokai, camera flashes*

Yokai: *stops and strikes a pose, laughing*

-------------

Krei: Those setbacks made us stronger, and set us on a path to a bright-- *accidentally splashes himself in the face with champagne*

Callaghan: *offscreen, laughing like a maniac* Are you kidding me, Alistair?

-------------

Cass: Yeah, wiiiiiiiings--*is too enthusiastic with what she's doing and accidentally tosses the bowl of wings towards the camera*

Director: What a waste of good wings, too...

-------------

Fred: The man in the mask who attacked us is none other than--

Fred's TV: *flashes a video of Fred singing in the shower instead*

Everyone else: *breaks out into laughter*

Fred: What? *looks at screen* Oh my f-----!

---------------

Wasabi: Fred, I was laser hand you in the f--*accidentally activates his blades, now pointed so close to Fred*

Fred: OH GOD WASABI I WAS JUST FOOLING AROUND--

Wasabi: Sorry, sorry! Didn't mean to do that--!

----------------

Gogo: THERE ARE NO RED LIGHTS IN A C--*voice breaks*

Wasabi: *holds back laughter*

Gogo: One word out of you, I swear--

-----------------

Callaghan: Was my daughter a set--*stops, tries not to laugh at Krei making funny faces at him* DAMN IT KREI, WE'RE FILMING!

Krei: *stops* Oh, we are?

Hiro and the team: *offscreen, all facepalming*

------------------

Baymax: *in his armor, kicks the warehouse's door down*

Hiro: *pops out behind him* Get him, Baymax--huh?

The rest of the cast and crew: *lights flicker on inside the warehouse* Surprise! Happy birthday, Hiro!

-----------------

Everyone: *throwing a rave party inside the Lucky Cat Cafe when they should be filming the scene after Tadashi's funeral*

Hiro and Tadashi: *on top of the stairs, dancing like idiots*

Tadashi: This is so much better than having me dead for the rest of the film!

[bio-blegh]

if big hero 6 had a gag reel, part two

Yama: Prepare your bot, Zero. *makes a loud fart*

Everyone: *stares at him*

Hiro: I'm sure no one was prepared for that, though.

------

Hiro: There's a fight across town; if I bolt, I can still make it!

Tadashi: *tries to pull back Hiro by the hoodie, but ends up tearing away part of his hoodie instead and Hiro trips facefirst forwards*

Hiro: Y-you owe me a new hoodie, you bonehead--

------

Hiro: *in his own jail cell, looks up and waves at Tadashi*

Tadashi: *glares at him from an opposite jail cell, sees Hiro laughing and breaks character* Hold on, what's so funny--

Everyone: *makes stupid faces behind Tadashi and then break out into laughter*

------

Baymax: *tries to cross the street with the microbot but a speeding motorcycle crashes into him; the nursebot then flies off-camera*

-------

Baymax: *after Hiro puts on his first armor* I have some concerns. *bits of his armor then wobble and then fly off, hitting Hiro and then the camera and the rest of the crew*

Director: *gets hit by Baymax's helmet* C-cut...

-------

Baymax and Hiro: *while flying across the bridge in their test flight, Baymax fails to swoop up and ends up hitting a truck*

-------

Yokai: *hurls huge metal container at the team*

Wasabi: *tries to scream but can't because his voice has gotten too hoarse*

Honey: This is what happens when you want to redo your scream fifteen times...

-------

Tadashi: *during the test videos* I-it worked! Oh, this is amazing-- *tries to kiss the screen but gets too eager and instead headbutts Baymax and falls back, hitting his head on a toolbox*

--------

Baymax: My programming prevents me from injuring another human being.

Hiro: Not anymore. *grabs Tadashi's chip and tosses it aside, but instead hits the camera and breaks it*

Callaghan: Umm, Hiro, you were supposed to go after me, not the cameraman.

---------

Tadashi and Hiro: *opens up a bin containing the microbots but gets a huge surprise when Krei pops out, taking them both by surprise*

Krei: Oh my god, you should have seen your faces--*sees the cameras around them* Oh, are we filming right now?

Tadashi: *slams the lid of the bin down on his head* Yes, we are.

----------

Hiro: I'm on a roll, big brother, and there is no stopping me!

Tadashi: H-hold on, I think the brakes on this moped are broken--

Hiro: Wait, what? But we're supposed to slow down right about--

Hiro and Tadashi: *crashes into the police car and is sent flying off-screen*

Tadashi: ...Great, now we're going to be arrested FOR REAL this time.

---------

Hiro: *when confronting Callaghan, who has Krei captured* Let him go!

Callaghan: *narrows eyes* Fine! *tosses Krei off-screen, with Krei screaming like a little girl* Oh, wait, was I supposed to not let him go?

Krei: S-seriously, was that you getting back at me for flooding your trailer, Cal?

Hiro: *facepalms* Unbelievable, these two.

---------

Hiro: *has fallen and is stuck between his bed and his desk*

Baymax: It is all right to cry. *leans forward and tries to grab Hiro out of there, but is struggling*

Hiro: O-oh no, I'm stuck for real this time, aren't I?

Baymax: *stands back up* I'm afraid you can cry all you want this time, Hiro. I can't get you out of there.

--------

Honey: *grabs a chem ball from her purse when she's first trying out her gear; she holds it up and the ball explodes in her face*

Hiro: *doubles back, stunned but then laughing about it* At least your gear works, right, Honey?

---------

Wasabi: *slashing away at microbots when his blades comes loose and flies off, he then stops and instead bumps facefirst into a column of microbots* T-that wasn't so cool, I'm sorry...can we do that again?

----------

Tadashi: *puts duct tape on Hiro's arm*

Hiro: Hate to break it to you, bro, but already been invented.

Tadashi: *tries to pull off the tape, but can't* Oh, we might have a problem*

Hiro: *narrows eyes* What kind of tape was that...?

Tadashi: Oh, don't worry, Hiro, I can fix this... *tries pulling off the tape some more, and when it comes off, he falls back off-camera*

Hiro and Tadashi: O-OUCH!

Baymax: *inflates* Hello, I am Baymax, your personal healthcare companion. Now which patient should I take care of first?

----------

Hiro: *while running from the microbots in the warehouse, he runs into a pipe with a loud clanging sound and falls on his back*

Baymax: *stops*

Microbots: *stops and recoils back*

Hiro: N-now would be a good time to be a nursebot, B-Baymax...

----------

Hiro: But Baymax can handle that guy!

Baymax: *is tossed back by Yokai but hits the windshield of Wasabi's car instead of its roof*

Everyone: *crushed under Baymax's weight* O-oh no...

-----------

Fred: My name is Fred, and it's been thirty days since my last--HOLY MOTHERF--------

Gogo: Dude, you can't swear in a Disney movie. *looks into camera* You should hear him offscreen, it's worse.

------------

Honey: *takes a pic of Yokai, camera flashes*

Yokai: *stops and strikes a pose, laughing*

-------------

Krei: Those setbacks made us stronger, and set us on a path to a bright-- *accidentally splashes himself in the face with champagne*

Callaghan: *offscreen, laughing like a maniac* Are you kidding me, Alistair?

-------------

Cass: Yeah, wiiiiiiiings--*is too enthusiastic with what she's doing and accidentally tosses the bowl of wings towards the camera*

Director: What a waste of good wings, too...

-------------

Fred: The man in the mask who attacked us is none other than--

Fred's TV: *flashes a video of Fred singing in the shower instead*

Everyone else: *breaks out into laughter*

Fred: What? *looks at screen* Oh my f-----!

---------------

Wasabi: Fred, I was laser hand you in the f--*accidentally activates his blades, now pointed so close to Fred*

Fred: OH GOD WASABI I WAS JUST FOOLING AROUND--

Wasabi: Sorry, sorry! Didn't mean to do that--!

----------------

Gogo: THERE ARE NO RED LIGHTS IN A C--*voice breaks*

Wasabi: *holds back laughter*

Gogo: One word out of you, I swear--

-----------------

Callaghan: Was my daughter a set--*stops, tries not to laugh at Krei making funny faces at him* DAMN IT KREI, WE'RE FILMING!

Krei: *stops* Oh, we are?

Hiro and the team: *offscreen, all facepalming*

------------------

Baymax: *in his armor, kicks the warehouse's door down*

Hiro: *pops out behind him* Get him, Baymax--huh?

The rest of the cast and crew: *lights flicker on inside the warehouse* Surprise! Happy birthday, Hiro!

-----------------

Everyone: *throwing a rave party inside the Lucky Cat Cafe when they should be filming the scene after Tadashi's funeral*

Hiro and Tadashi: *on top of the stairs, dancing like idiots*

Tadashi: This is so much better than having me dead for the rest of the film!