#you better fucking shut tf up
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All these BT stans who harass Buddie stans because Buddie is not canon or Eddie is not canon queer are so fucking stupid. Clearly they have not stepped a foot in the chinese bl/danmei show/movie fandoms (or they're pretending not to) because BITCH NONE OF THEM ARE CANON QUEERS IN THE SHOWS EITHER. You don't know pain until your beloved queer character calls their lover brother in a show to escape censorship.
Or let's talk about anime shall we?? How about Toya and Yukito from Cardcaptor Sakura being bi and gay respectively with an on-screen confession scene (Yukito tells Sakura) which was censored so that noone knew for YEARS that they were supposed to be star-crossed lovers!! (Also Syaoran, a boy, has a crush on Yukito and Tomoyo, a girl, was supposed to have a crush on Sakura. Sakura was confirmed to be pansexual/queer retrospectively by the writer).
How about characters who couldn't be confirmed as lovers/queer due to fear of backlash when the show/movie aired (or for any other reasons) and were retrospectively confirmed by the creators that they were meant to be lovers and/or queer-coded??! Ryan from HSM?? Lando Calrissian?? Mass Effect?? Loki and Lucifer never label themselves on the show but they are not straight.
Get out of here with that "they're not a canon ship and he's not queer" nonsense. Not everything queer is canon. If you truly know and respect the queer culture then you know that part of it IS the fact that a lot of it is not canon.
They're out there talking nonsense about non-canon ships and writing fanfics about their 10 minutes screen time ship when modern fanfiction was popularized by Spirk shippers which btw *checks notes* NOT CANON.
Also funny how BT stans argue till they turn red that Eddie is straight and is not queer so that invalidates our ship. Completely forgetting that Trolldemort was also straight (only queer-coded which btw Eddie is far more queer coded in canon than Tinsel ever was) until he was confirmed to be gay this season. Buck was straight until he was confirmed bisexual this season.
BOTH CHARACTERS OF YOUR FUCKING SHIP WERE NOT CANON QUEERS EITHER YOU FUCKS.
#calling actual queer people homophobic for your stupid ass ship??#when they're far more aware of queer culture than your straight ass??#you better fucking shut tf up#sorry for the rant but i was annoyed#this is all over the place but the point still stands#they don't know jack shit#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buckley#evan buck buckley#911 abc#anti bucktommy#anti tommy kinard#your ship is not invalid because the character is not canon queer#your favourite character can be queer without it being canonly confirmed#Straight people can hate a canon ship without any issues but queer people hate a canon ship and suddenly they're homophobic??#i know you're huffing that good shit that damages your brain
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wAIT
hhh headcanon that kevin is atheist and raised by atheists 💞
because he doesnt know about holy water. AND. thats what i am. and my family. yay for projecting onto fictional characters <<<333
#IDK WHY BELIEVING A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IS ATHEIST MAKES ME HAPPY BUT IT DOES#LIKE I NEVER THOUGHT ATHEIST REP MATTERED UNTIL I FOUND OUT GRUNKLE STAN WAS ATHEIST AND I FELT HAPPY IDK WHY#yk what. if christians get nice pleasant search results so tf can we.#i dont want “atheist” to always yield “haha were better than you fuck religion” NO SHUT UP THATS RUDE ASF#i fw theists 💪#and kevin. he's my boy. i love him#kevin spooky month#spooky month kevin#spooky month 6#hollow sorrows#atheist#atheism#giggles and kicks my legs#idk#atheist rep#reddit type atheists fuck off ♡
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gonna kill the minotaur now wish me luck
#i thought i should update you guys on my game#since i have basically nothing better to do#i'm still jobless#it's been a week & i am losing my mind#but hey at least i have music & games & coffee#and it makes me feel calm it's a nice distraction#(yes murdering enemies in my game is making me feel calm)#(especially when i'm listening to musicals while doing it)#(i just killed the cyclops while listening to mary poppins soundtrack)#(it's time for the minotaur now)#(i'm listening to encanto btw)#(shut tf up poppy nobody cares)#but the truth is i'm writing this post because i'm fucking scared of those creatures & i don't want to fight them#i needed a tumblr break to prepare lol#i say whatever and whatever that i want*
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tw abuse in the tags
#my dad decided that he was going to share his posts on threads where he trauma dumped shit with me and my sister#and it pisses me off so much that he can talk about all the trauma he’s gone through#and all the shitty things he’s gone through#and literally anything and everything that’s happened to him#but won’t acknowledge that he abused me my mom and my sister growing up#i got the worst of it all bc ofc i fucking did my sister was his favorite and i knew from a young age that she was#still is tbh#i’ve only been back in contact with my dad for a little over 5 years and since then there have been 3 separate occasions#where he’s acknowledged what he’s done to me and how it’s affected our relationship#the last one being last year where he actually apologized#but the first was in 2019 when we first started talking again and then again in 2021#and then last year in 2023#and i can’t talk about the shit he put me through bc he shuts down and doesn’t want to talk about it#and it pisses me tf off that he can do literally anything else to better himself#but the minute i want to even throw a passing fancy towards our past he freezes#and i feel like i have to change the subject bc lol dad’s uncomfortable!#i’ll admit i don’t talk about the shit he put me through willingly to anyone not even my therapist#but how the fuck are you going to sit there and trauma dump to the person YOU traumatized? and won’t talk about the trauma with?#fuck all the way off that’s fucking bullshit and we all know it
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My friend playing HFW: so what upset you most about playinh this game?
Me, thinking about Varl and breathing heavily with tears of pure rage in my eyes: just keep playing
#i HAD to shut up#cause i almost went TF OFF but he hasn’t played it yet#and i don’t want to spoil it but OH MY GOD#all my grief and anger came back in an INSTANT#most pointless death in the history of deaths#and imma go to my grave angry about it#varl deserved so much better and i hope whoever wrote that bullshit feels utter shame until they die#god…FUCK YOU guerilla#i need a blunt
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hi sorry I disappeared for like two weeks but I was overwhelmed with the news that there's a significant chance I may be on the autism spectrum (and possibly have a nice side helping of adhd) which if true has a fuckton of implications for how poorly many, many things throughout my life have played out, so needless to say I am not doing very well
(and by that I mean I was mostly crying on and off for days, and then cried some more when I realized it will cost thousands if I want to get a proper assessment done and I'm not confident my insurance would cover all of it, and also depending on how much my hours continue to be cut this month I may not even have said insurance for much longer at all hahahaha)
#i'm so angry#thinking of how many adults complained about me and my behaviour growing up but couldn't help me at all#how long have i suffered for no reason#because i wasn't a completely nonverbal boy who liked trains or some shit#...actually i did really like trains but it didn't matter apparently#but learning about all the signs and symptoms in girls/women has felt like getting punched in the gut over and over#and all the absolute worst of my childhood and teenage years has rushed back to me with new context#and i'm so fucking angry and sad and upset#and now my mom is angry af too because she took me to a psychologist in complete desperation when i was like five#because i couldn't control my emotions for shit once i was home from school#i would just flip tf out and throw stuff around my room and be incapable of saying anything until i had completely calmed down#and this was happening on a regular basis and she didn't know what tf to do#and while at school i couldn't make eye contact or advocate for myself and again i just shut down completely if i was too stressed or upset#and several other things#and the psychologist was basically like lol idk what's wrong with her but you probably just need to be a better mother :)#just slightly more professionally#NO ONE ever mentioned the possibility of autism to her#and i feel like some of these things have...worsened when i'm at work but i couldn't figure out why i was having so much difficulty#and why i felt so drained after even a short shift#but then reading about masking hit me like a fucking freight train#and apparently my brother’s girlfriend-who was officially diagnosed a few years ago-suspected it when she first met me??#but idk what to do now bc i have an doctor's appointment next week#and i feel like i should bring it up because i hate just self-diagnosing#but even if i somehow managed to pay for an assessment (lmao) i don't feel like my doctor's going to take it seriously#considering he's been our family doctor since my birth#and apparently couldn't be bothered to take my mom's concerns that seriously back then either#jfc I’m rambling again don’t look at me
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I stg if I see one more person call the goddamn honeymoon phase of a relationship "love bombing" I'm going to chew through the earth's crust
#love bombing is one of two fucking things#it is either a cult tactic in which members ''feign friendship'' in order to manipulate interested parties into becoming more invested#OR it is an abuse tactic where your partner showers you with affection‚ pressures you quickly towards intense commitment and then gets mad#at you if you pay attention to anything else#love bombing is NOT when your partners behaves highly affectionately towards you at the beginning of a relationship#infatuation exists! people latch strongly onto new things! they've probably idealized you at least a little bit!#it takes time for people to adjust to a new layer of relationship#if it is not part of the abuse pattern of idealization devalue discard then it isnt love bombing#and devalue doesn't mean just losing interest. it means shit like belittling you or otherwise diminishing you in order to control you#ok sorry thats the end of my rant im just. so tired. of the pop pschology pathologization of relationships these days#most people aren't abusive. they're just toxic. they're making mistakes and accidentally hurting people#im not saying you shouldn't feel hurt. it sucks when that shit happens accidentally! your feelings fucking matter!#but understanding intent is important to better protecting yourself in the future#bc the behaviors that protect you from abuse and the behaviors that protect you from accidents are Different. you need both#okay ill shut tf up now
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I love seeing those TikTok’s of plus sized girls speaking about how we get treated differently by men when compared to our smaller friends cuz they honestly speak nothing but facts
#like this shit has had me fucked up since who knows when so my immediate response to male attention irl is to shut it tf down#cuz it’s either a) a joke or his friends bet him to do it for a dare#b) he wants to worm his way in by befriending the ‘unattractive one’ to get to the hot one#or c) maybe the dude is interested but it’ll fizzle out so fast cuz I can’t keep in contact to save my life#like the amount of times I’ve been treated as less then by a guy my friend was trying to get into a relationship is so sad#cuz he’d treat me like a nuisance right at the hello and she’s less then a foot away just watching#especially when the ‘she’s shy and just doesn’t know you card’ when he’s also meeting my other friends I came with for the first time too#I know that dude took one look at me and hoped tf out of trying to even get past hello#he really cemented it by asking for everyone’s socials and purposely didn’t look my way at all when collecting#and yes when I did try and talk his face would just gloss over until I was done and then he’s be fully engaged with my other friend he met#even in my own friend groups that involve some guys I usually get treated as the last resort#I honestly think the best treatment I ever got from a man was actually from a toddler 💀💀#now THAT is sad as fuck to know that a 3 year old be treating me better then the guys around my age
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so much (for) stardust reviewers don't shit on mania/ABAP challenge
#shut up anna#fob#this isn't that serious but also we get it your favorite fall out boy is pre-hiatus maybe stfu#sorry you can't have fun and enjoy mania sucks to be you lmao#like you can (rightfully) sing smfs' praises without being like 'its so much better than whatever tf mania was' like#its pretty obvious they couldn't get over the fact fob sounds different than they did in 2005 and wrote off mania on thise grounfs#rather than approach the album as its own entity#because mania FUCKS its great#like wilson? sunshine riptide? fucking stay frosty royal milk tea? last of the real ones? they all fucking slap#and ill die on that hill#anyway
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thinking about slaughtering bryce by putting jensen in this outfit <3
#specifically pic 1 bryce would not have any coherent thoughts ngl#something about bryce never shutting tf really makes jensen making him speechless That much better huh#some of his work outfits are similar in fit and they kill bryce every time#poor guy is trying to do his job and jensens gotta fuck everything up#im telling you he is a registered workplace distraction#bryce lahela × jensen valentine
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[Image ID/ Tumblr tag that reads: #sorry if you felt the magic or whatever. it's 2023 and trans and jewish people and poc are suffering. get over it. /End ID]
[Image ID/ Tumblr tags that read: #see most of the time #im death of the author #100% and back #even liking problematic media! #cool! find some worth in it #but not with hp #jkr is pretty much a politician now #and she uses her money from hp to fund her political endeavors that harm trans people #and even publicity helps her remain relevant and have social power #and like yeah it stinks #like the movies especially because that wasn't all her #it had lovely actors and artists and beautiful sets #but it still belongsss to her #the actors and crew have moved on #and you can mourn the nostalgia and the whimsical world that helped grow you # and no one will fault you for that #but man #publicly showing how much you love hp #has kind of become a minor guage for trans people to ser who is 'woke' and who is actually out here angry and devastated for trans friends #like hp betrayed you #you shouldn't feel tempted to return to something that tricked you into fueling a monster /End ID]
can people with harry potter urls just not fucking follow me
#i have less than no patience for people who try to excuse their shitty praxis on grounds of nostalgia#d'y'all think the scores of trans and jewish former fans haven't had to mourn that series/world on deeper levels than you'll ever have know#all that's being asked now is to shut up about it. hell ya don't even have to move tf on tho you should; there's way better shit to get int#targets of jkr's vitriol have had to come to terms that that world that masqueraded as a haven of magic and love#that beckoned us in when we were also little kids who saw ourselves in harry when he was lonely and mistreated#all of that was not set aside by honest choice as we grew and learned but was ripped away by bigotry that looked at us and our existence#and said actually fuck you. you don't deserve love and magic. you don't deserve peace or even the dignity of living your own life as you ar#not if jkr has her way with it at least
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imagine being this brainwashed by beauty standards
every time a curly girl chooses the iron an angel dies
#natural hair always looks better on everyone#get fucked if you think differently#society tells you straight is beautiful or what the fuck ever that’s not true#as someone who ended up straightening their hair bc everyone told me it would be prettier if i did#shut tf up#learn to love every part of yourself or take that attitude ELSEWHERE#imagine being this butt hurt over someone telling u ur natural hair is better#please grow up and stop whining#take your self hate somewhere else this not for you
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hey love can i request brothers bff cho and how he's just down bad for you 🤍🤍🤍
𝐚. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: omg wait, i fucks with this baddd
⊹ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: Choso x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - masturbation (m!) - oral (m! receiving) - tit/breast fucking (m! receiving) - cowgirl position - pet names (baby, darling, honey, sweetie) - unprotected sex (psa: wrap it up or get tf up) - implied that reader is big chested - Choso crushing on you hard, lmao - mention of drool/spit.
⊹ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1.4k
Choso knew better than to be attracted to you, the sibling of his best friend ever.
Your brother and Choso have been buddies for a while, meeting during his part-time job at a burger joint as servers and finding out they have so much in common. Being older siblings, lovers of rock music, and relating to so much together, the two often hung out after work and became pretty good friends. Just two people vibing out in each others’ company, and there was nothing to make this relationship complicated!
“Hey, Choso, I’ve told you about my sister before, right?”
You greeted him with a smile. “It’s nice to meet you, Choso!”
Well, that is until you came and absolutely rocked Choso’s world.
You were the younger sibling of two; a college senior comes home biweekly to take care of laundry and then drives back up for your education. By your gorgeous face and alluring figure, Choso was struck by your image from the first time his eyes ever laid on you. You were such a kind spirit, always so sweet to him and others surrounding you — you’d want to hang with the boys whenever you had the chance while you were visiting, which was hellish for the brown-haired man.
You’d laugh along with the jokes, making Choso’s heart skip uncontrollably, and the way you’d lean to him when you’re sleepy watching a movie with them pushed the guy on the verge of shutting down. He could never get tired of how you’d say his name; it came out so dear from your lips as if he could be under your spell at any second. And it didn’t help that you’d walk around the house with shorts on, the lower fringes constantly threatening Choso on whether they’d creep up to see the mere crevice of your ass.
As said before, he knew better than siblings of best friends were off limits. However, you were becoming too much for him. It’s been half a year of seeing you, and there has never been a day or night where you haven’t popped up in his head one way or another, particularly when his mind would think of you in the most…lustful ways.
He throws his head back, reminiscing about you and your outfit from the pub. The way your breasts were tucked in nicely by the window of your bodycon dress, yet the cleavage was too tempting for his eyes not to notice. The dress sculpted your curves dangerously, Choso fighting the urge to put his hand on your hip to feel your clothed skin. And your lipgloss made your lips shine; every time you spoke to him was a test for him not to kiss you right there in front of your brother. It was so cruel how you looked so good for him!
He was spending the night at yours after a night out drinking with you and your brother, using the basement bedroom to sleep. Sleep evades him; however, he uses this space to deal with the erection he’s been dying to indulge in this entire night instead. His teeth pull the bottom of his shirt, dark jeans discarded to the floor, and his hand pumps his shaft that’s freed from his boxer briefs.
He grunts at the memory, teeth grinding while he strokes his long cock. Precum exuding from the urethra slides down to the base and wets his fingers. “Fuuck, Y/n,” your name is said in choked moans, the horny man fisting himself in a faster motion. Brown eyebrows are trenched, and his abdomen begins to flex. Shit, I’m so close, so cl—
“Choso?”
He never in his life froze still in an instant, and his heart goes to a complete stop, too. No way.
“Ca–…May I come in?”
No words are said from either side, so Choso’s heat immediately shifts to icy cold when he hears the door open, and your frame is all he sees. You’re still wearing the beautiful dress, yet your face is molded into an expression of utter anxiousness. Sweat goes down Choso’s forehead, oh fucking shit!
“I came down to see if you were okay and needed anything,” your eyes were downcast to the floor, chewing on your lips during this awkward situation. “But…I heard you say my name and…”
Oh, it was so over for him. All Choso could do was stare at you in dread, entirely shocked that you saw him masturbate at the thought of you! You were fidgeting with your dress, perplexed about how to handle this predicament, too. He was so done for; not only was he thinking of you, the sibling of his best friend, and using said thoughts of you, but now you are aware of how he pictures you in his fucked up head! Yup, he can never walk into this house again. “S–Sorry, Y/n! I’ll just go and—“
“Can I help?”
Again, his body goes rigid mid-stride of getting off the bed after pulling his underwear up. ….What?
“I mean, can I…help you with that?” You meekly walk into the room and close the door behind you. “I am the one who made you like this, so…I’m okay with it if you are…..”
Choso blinks, too alarmed to make any movements. “But, your brother…” You’re quiet for a few seconds before you spook him by taking steps in his direction. He gulps thickly when your figure crawls on the bed, too close for his brain to comprehend. You take his hand with your soft ones and bring his fingers to your lips to kiss, and his breath hitches when you suck and lick his digits. The boner stuffed in his briefs twitches at the sensation of your tongue running against the underside of his middle finger and sucking on it.
You peer at him, “What about him?” That is what you say before lifting your dress to remove your panties. And just when Choso thought his life was about to be thrown in the gutter, you flipped the script on him again.
In his head, Choso knew he shouldn’t be doing this.
“Mmm…Mmahh! Oh, Choso, you taste so good…”
But in his heart, he couldn’t help but give in to this situation.
You were situated between his legs, ripped him off his briefs for you to suck on his glans freely. Your tinge dances around his cockhead to prompt more come to ooze out of his urethra, and your hand slides up and down to stroke his member. Choso whimpers under your touch, and shivers crawl up his spine as you lick from the base to the tip before sucking hard.
“Fuuck, Y/n,” he grips the sheets, barely containing his hips to buck to your lips. “Your mouth, it’s—Hssshh…!”
“Mmm?” You blink before releasing the tip with a sound. “What about my mouth, Choso baby?” Fuck, the nickname made the pink of his ears creep down to his nape. “You feel good?” He nods at your question, and you giggle before sucking one of his balls, resulting in a sharp gasp from the brown-haired man. “I’m so happy you are…”
Hallow cheeks take in his cock, busying your throat with his length that has you humming blissfully. You massage his waist as you bob your face up and down, and shaky breaths leave his lips while his legs jolt with every swish of your tongue.
“—Shhiiit, oh shit, hnnn,” he can’t do it, you were driving him crazy. “Y/n, you’re gonna make me…Mmmm”
You pick up on his cue, withdrawing your lips from him to maneuver and pull down the top of your dress. Caramel eyes widen at the sight of your breast spilling out, forgetting how to breathe when you bring them to wrap around his long dick. You move them around to please him, taking the tip back into your mouth to slurp his leaking essence that trickles down to your chest.
“Mmaahh, go ahead, darling,” you place kisses on the tip, Choso looking at nothing but your mounds swallow him with every stroke. It takes mere seconds for his orgasm to sneak up on him, his jizz coming out to fall and trickle down in between the rifts of your tits. “There you go, let it out for me…” the way you looked at him with half-lidded eyes took his breath away, especially with the spit that connects your gloss-shining lips to his spit-and-come coated shaft.
And when he’s finally inside you? He’s too far gone to even think of being away from you.
“Ohhh, hoooh!! Chosooo, y’u feel soo good!”
Your dress was cast-off entirely, your nude body bouching up and down on Choso, his cock bullying the inside of your cunt. It’s been a solid fifteen minutes shared between the two of you exploring each other’s bodies, and sweaty skin exchanges heat from the constant motions. And come from rounds prior spill from your chasm as you ride on Choso’s dick with a rhythm.
He has his hands on your hips now, using you to keep him steady before he gets too lost in the feeling. Not that it hasn’t happened already; the man moans with every clamp of your walls around him, tightening around him with every graze of your g-spot. You wail for him up top, and your aroused sounds have to be the cutest things he’s ever heard. And the way your tits jump every time you plummet down to the base of him, it’s an image that will haunt him for the rest of his days.
“Tahhh, ughh, Jesus Christ…” He’s too sensitive right now; he just came not too long ago and is now being chased down for another one. “Y/n, sweetie, too fast, slow d—Ahh…!”
You hear him and titter, “Yeah? Want me to slow down, huh…” You bring your hips up excruciatingly slow, listening intently to the shaky sobs from the brunette as you get to the very top. And then you smack yourself down with haste, sharing a yelp at the rushed sensation. You do it again, “Think you’re about to cum again, huh, honey?”
His hands now come to your ass to grope with the flesh, and you twitch around his girth at the hunger. “Yeahhh…”
“You gonna be good and cum for me again, right?” Another snap of your ass crashing down on him.
“Yess, baby,” he throws his head back to the pillows, his head pounding so hard it could kill him. You can feel him pulsating within your slit. “Almost there…Ohh–ooo..!”
You bite your lip, relishing at the sight of him being desperate for release. You lean forward to him, your breasts meshing with his chest as you snake a hand around the back of his head. You place your lips on his, and he doesn’t hesitate to reciprocate.
The kiss gets hotter when you dial up the speed, tongues swirling and exchanging spit as the friction becomes a lot more pleasurable than before. Choso’s ears ring the deeper you bring him in to kiss, humming on his tongue as you suck on it with harsh rocks on his length from scraping places you couldn’t reach. He’s so fucking addicted to you; his composure long deteriorated the moment he first put his cock inside you.
Choso bucks himself to you in sync, his climax coming in just a few ruts. He howls into you, and you wail along as your hips don’t rest until you’re hit with a crescendo of your own. Contracting your vaginal walls milks him, exerting his load into you again to spill and flow down your sticky frames.
You two heave and pant in each other’s mouth before the kiss is broken, and the string of saliva is evidence of you being one with the other. Although the both of you are dazed, you smile at him before kissing his nose. “Glad I helped you out, huh?” He chuckles weakly as you lay kisses on his chin.
KNOCK!! KNOCK!!
And just like that, the two of you are frozen yet again. Wait…
Too late, the bedroom door busts open with a bang, and in comes your brother!
“Yooo, Choso, my guy—hic,” your brother stumbles inside the room, still a bit loopy and drunk. “Wanna go up and hit a quick blunt with— ah…”
The heat shared between you and the man below you switched to silent torture, awkwardness suffocating the three figures staring at each other. And this is the exact reason why Choso should’ve known better than to mingle around with you…
© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs and comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ☆ header edit done by me + dividers by @/benkeibear.
#𝑯𝒐𝒔𝒉𝒊 ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ 𝑾𝒓𝒊𝒕𝒆𝒔: 𝑺𝒄𝒆𝒏𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒐𝒔#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#choso x reader#choso smut#choso kamo x reader#choso kamo smut#choso x you#choso x y/n#kamo choso x reader#choso kamo x you#choso kamo x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk imagines#anime smut#jujustsu kaisen x reader
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The Video (Part 2) (LN4)
Summary: They’ve taken leaked videos to a whole new level.
Warnings: its a sex tape so that, sexual conversations, language, explicit
Note: when i was trying to come up with a part 2 for the video i literally couldnt think of anything until i was half asleep and this came to me and i was like THATS IT 🤓☝🏻(part 1 is here)
TWITTER
mclarensgirly woke up today and saw “lando norris y/n y/l/n sex tape” trending and thought it was a joke so i clicked on it and GOOD GOD IT WAS NOT A JOKE
- ln4andop81 my jaw DROPPED when it surfaced
- mclarenfan22 anybody watch it??
- mclarensgirly yeah ofc who do you think i am
- ln4andop81 YES.
- f1fan2 you bet your ass i grabbed my popcorn and STUDIED that vid
- mclarensgirly i had an idea lando was dirty but BROOOOOOO
- ln4andop81 its even hotter that the camera isnt propped up somewhere its literally being filmed by lando as he goes in from the back
- f1fan2 I LITERALLY STILL CANT WRAP MY HEAD AROUND IT LIKE HIS VOICE WAS SO CLOSE TO THE MICROPHONE AND YOU COULD HEAR ALL HIS MOANS AND THE SHIT HE WAS SAYING TO HER
- mclarenfan22 “you like being fucked from behind baby?” I CEASED TO EXIST.
- ln4andop81 WHEN HE WENT FASTER AND SAID “fuck baby so tight” ��😩😩
- f1fan2 the way he gripped her hips so he could go harder>>>>
- mclarenfan22 this video has literally altered my brain chemistry.
—
y/nnn yeah ofc we have sex… look at him.
Comments:
danielricciardo HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
- landonorris shut tf up
- y/nnn let him laugh its fine im getting good dick
- danielricciardo im no longer laughing.
mclarenfan22 SHES SO REAL OMFG
Landos-lover1 slut behavior
- y/nnn stalker behavior babes, youre not his lover, i am 💋
- mclarensgirly oh how i wish to be as unbothered as her
- f1fan2 SHUT. DOWN.
landonorris this was not the planned statement we talked abt 🥲
- y/nnn planned statement my ass we were having good sex let them wish they were us
- ln4andop81 she understands the lando girlies to a level that makes me believe she once was one of us too
- y/nnn OH HELL YEAH I WAS DONT GET IT TWISTED HE WAS MY CELEB CRUSH FOR YEARS BEFORE WE STARTED DATING
- ln4andop81 BRUHHHHHH YOU MANIFESTED IT I ENVY YOU
- y/nnn THANK YOU THANK YOU I DID MY BEST
- ln4andop81 YEAH AND NOW YOURE HAVING GREAT SEX AND RUBBING IT IN EVERYONES FACES
- y/nnn THAT TRULY WAS THE GOAL.
- landonorris what just happened
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landonorris apparently the statement never mattered anyway so basically i love my girlfriend and that video was supposed to be kept between us but honestly now all yall bitches know im good in bed SO THE NICKNAME NORIZZ BETTER BE PUT. DOWN.
Comments:
carlossainz norizz will never die.
- danielricciardo norizz lives on.
- oscarpiastri norizz forevermore.
- landonorris i hate you
- y/nnn its ok baby they didnt see the tape so they dont understand
- landonorris well now they need to watch it to understand im sick AND TIRED of this
- oscarpiastri ARE YOU STUPID DID YOU JUST ASK ME TO WATCH YOUR SEX TAPE
- danielricciardo lando there is a target on your back.
- carlossainz im gonna pretend like i dont even know who you are
- y/nnn what an overwhelming no!
- landonorris 😒😒
oscarandlando4ever norizz the nickname was forgotten the first time around when the grinding vid surfaced
- f1fan2 yeah they went in for the overkill this time
mclarenfan34 yeah we def KNOW youre good in bed now dw
- mclarenfan22 “do you like it when i make your eyes roll back my love?” PROVED THAT.
- mclarensgirly “ill never get over the feeling of you fuck baby” 🤭🤭🤭
- f1fan2 *she moans his name* “yes y/n say my name baby let everyone know who makes you feel this good” I HAD TO TAKE A BREATHER
- mclarensgirly “good girl” and “youre taking me so well” HAD ME DRY HEAVING.
- ln4andop81 no but the best part of the entire vid was when she came and he moaned “yes baby ill never get tired of the feeling of you cumming around my dick like a good girl”
- y/nnn im a lucky girl ‼️
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TWITTER
mclarensgirly one month since the sex tape leaked and we FINALLY get the info from lando on HOW it got leaked
- mclarensgirly in an interview with lissie he says, “it was actually my fault. There’s a, uh, folder, if you will, on my laptop that has videos and pictures of that category which we have accumulated in the years we’ve been together. Well, anyway, i was emailing with a fan about her transaction with quadrant merch. It’s a long story but her order had been so screwed up that i had to step in and see it out myself, but, nonetheless, i was trying to attach her old receipt and new receipt to the email, but, because it was 2 AM and I was exhausted, I didn’t realize I went into me and y/n’s folder, didn’t realize I clicked and attached that video. By the time I realized what I had done, the email had already been sent. The fan never emailed me back to get her merchandise, but the next morning we [y/n and him] woke up to it being plastered on all platforms.”
- mclarensgirly he later goes on to say, “No, we weren’t that mad. I mean, yes, we were mad the fan had leaked it, but we weren’t upset it was out there. You can see us make jokes about it on our social medias. We’ve made sex jokes before and we had that other video leak a few months back, so it isn’t a shocker or touchy subject with our fans that we have sex. Yeah, the video was a lot and I’m sure made people uncomfortable, I’m sorry for that, but, at the end of the day, it’s a natural, healthy part of a relationship and we didn’t feel the need to try and cover it up.”
- ln4andop81 YOURE FORGETTING MY FAVORITE QUOTE FROM THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW WHEN HE SAYS “we have great sex! We have a great sex life! And if people know that I’m more than capable of satisfying my girlfriend in bed, then so fucking be it. Neither of us are complaining.”
—
TWITTER
landonorris 2 videos leaked, nervous the others will too
- y/nnn put the GODDAMN folder on a flashdrive and give it to me PLZ. i will keep it safe
- landonorris only way ill do that is if you recreate both leaked vids with me
- y/nnn deal.
#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 x reader#mclaren#lando norris x reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris fanfic#lando norris fluff#lando norris imagines#lando norris edit#lando norris x you#lando norris smut#lando norris fanfiction#lando norris
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He is NOT him
#Blud doesn't know what he's talking about#who let him cook#bro is not okay#Bro is NOT himothy#That title belongs to my goat Danny phantom#what is bro yapping about#Bro's a true yappster#you couldn't find a better girl#You just got the ditzy airbag#is he stupid?#Bro's gotta sit his ass down#bleach#“nah I'd win” sounding ass like shut tf up#I shitted in a jar after eating taco bell last night#danny phantom#ghost rider#scott pilgrim#captain underpants#god usopp#FUCK I ran out of tags to put on here#Ok I got one more in me#I like big black oily men
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Roommates’ Trivial Tiff
Pretty standard nerdy asshole to himbo TF, who doesn't love some cosmic justice ! -Occam
“You just don’t understand what it’s like dude. You have no idea how hard all this stuff is for me.” Brock was struggling to get through to his roommate, someone he has time and time again been more than cordial with. In response Harvey scoffs and rolls his eyes refusing to engage and instead doubling down, “I’m sure it’s real difficult with all your paid tutors and your-”
“You’re not even listening bro! You like to think you’re so elevated, like you have all the answers but you don’t even try to understand what anyone else is going through.” Harvey grimaces and briefly tosses about whether or not this is true but stubbornly neglects to internalize the criticism, “Uhh, I do too?” Brock bites his tongue to prevent just blowing up at his roommate and instead he tries a different angle, “Oh yeah? If that’s the case then, bet you know a lot about me huh? Since we’ve been roommates for a year now,” pausing as he narrows his eyes briefly at Harvey, “and ostensibly we’re friends right?”
Harvey struggles not to display his ever present irritation as he retorts, “Of course we are, uh, dude.” Brock does a better job hiding his intentions as he issues a challenge, “so if we were to say, quiz each other you think you’d come up on top lil dude?” With this gauntlet laid there is little recourse in Harvey’s mind but to accept it, there are few times he enjoys showing off so much as in a trivia contest. So what he might have a less than pristine record of respecting oafs like his roommate, he is certainly not to lose in any battle of the wits regardless of topic or stipulations there may be.
Brock puts out his hand and states the stakes, “You can of course bow out whenever, but uh, how about every question the winner takes something from the loser?” Harvey was resolved to win before hearing the terms and is now spitefully even more eager now as he eyes Brock’s side of the room looking for whatever his prize is sure to be.
Without any further clarification Brock promptly launches into the game, “I guess we’ll start real easy yeah? Only fair.” Harvey feels resentment start to brew as he feels he’s being talked down to as Brock goes on, “For starters then, What’s my major?” Harvey audibly gulps and feels his face blanche as he scrambles to find such an incredibly simple answer. This is such an obvious and pressing piece of information it would be impossible not to have it on deck.
Seeing the hesitation Brock laughs incredulously, “God dude are you kidding? How could you not know this, I-” He shifts his jaw waiting for the second shoe to drop as it is suddenly clear he is about to clean house, this asshole is going to learn respect by hook or by crook. Harvey’s eyes that were just hungrily looking through Brock’s possessions now retread their path, searching for the answer, his eyes linger on some sports bandages and protein powder and he kicks himself for forgetting. “Well duh dude, you’re doing a sports medicine or a trainer degree or whatever. Sorry that I forgot what the proper name is, it’s not exactly high in the list of things I need to know.”
Brock stares down at the clueless nerd before him and slowly shakes his head. “Not even close Harv. It’s-” Before he can finish though Harvey stands and shouts, “Don’t fucking call me that! I bet you don’t know mine either!” This leaves Brock aghast, he crosses his arms and narrows his eyes, “Of course I fucking do! You never shut up about it! I’m lucky if my headphones can block out you whining about homework while also constantly talking yourself up! It’s so, fucking, annoying!”
Hurt by this despite his typical apathy to others Harvey starts up once more, “Okay but you didn’t say-” “Computer Engineering.” Harvey blushes in shame, not over his disrespect but of getting the question wrong. Suddenly there’s a hum in the room and the shadows in the corner grow darker and Brock looks around, “Well I suppose that question really tees me up on what to take huh? I’ll take your major.”
“Wha?” caught on the other foot Harvey blinks and sees that his textbooks and assignments are suddenly piled on Brock’s desk. He feels anxiety rise in his chest unsure of what has happened though confident this must be a prank or something. “No no no that can’t be right? What is happening?” He then returns to look at his roommate once more, a scowl plastered on his face as Brock who, despite his impressive stature always aims to present as kind and gentle, cannot help but smirk as he feels he has gotten one over on this jerk.
He stretches, exposing his midriff and flexing his arms behind his head, perhaps to try and allure or intimidate Harvey, he’s not sure, but Harvey is not going to just take this sitting down.Though at the present, he is too uncomfortable to even vocalize his discomfort as he stands there trying not to shake. Instead Brock begins once more, “Urgh kinda see what all that complaining was about now Harv, kinda got a lot on my plate now hah!”
Harvey stares daggers at his roommate, “Brock I don’t know what kind of nonsense is going through your dumbass ox brain. But it’s not funny, I’m sure you’re used to bullying little g-”
“Excuse me? I’m a bully!? I know you’re not saying that, I go out of my way to be kind, even to little chip on their shoulder assholes like you. I just,” Brock takes a deep breath and flexes his jaw before he continues. “It doesn’t matter actually. I trust you have a vested interest in trying again though right? Surely you want your major back?”
At the moment Harvey is caught between the idea that this is some kind of Christmas Carol-ass dream where he’s supposed to learn a lesson or once more that this is just a prank by Brock. Amenable as he’s always been, Harvey's convinced that behind this lunkhead is the vitriol of the typical jerk jock. In this impossible chance that this is reality though, he can’t just give up his major. He needs it to be an, uh? God what was, no what is his major anyway?
Harvey looks around in shock as he suddenly can’t bring his current course schedule to his mind, but he was literally in class this morning right? He feels his coursework draining from his mind as fear and rage begin to rise in his frail body. Images of lecture halls and professors flash through his mind before they just as swiftly dissipate, somewhere within him deeper than memory he feels that he was studying something with numbers. Mathematics, physics, engineering, something he was good at. He is determined to get that back as he speaks up finally, “What is the next question.”
Brock smiles and toys around in his head, confident that he will end up on top. “How about you pick this one, give you a fighting chance.” Harvey purses his lips and struggles to produce a question that he knows the answer to that his roommate will not. Oh duh, he’ll just ask him a math question, easy! Certainly not the aim of the game but Harvey just needed to get his life back. “What’s a derivative.”
“Kinda not in the spirit of the game dude but whatever. I took calc you know. It’s the rate of change in response to a variable. Now since you’re still being an ass how about I lob one back? How about you derivative 𝑓(𝑥)= 2cos(𝑥)−6sec(𝑥)+3?” Harvey is flat stunned, this is some entry level shit but he cannot for the life of him bring the information to mind. He’s just as sharp as he always has been but anything beyond rudimentary trig is continuing to trickle out of his mind. He meekly chuckles out, “uh easy, it’s f(x) equals, uh tan-”
There’s a blaring in his head as both men are aware of his immediate slip up. Energy once more rises in the air as Brock looks down almost pitifully at his roommate this time. “Now I am sorry for this Harvey but, oof that course load! Like you so relish to say, I am just not that bright hm?” Harvey shakes his head as he realizes the horror about to occur. Brock looks a little uncomfortable as he continues, “After failing to pull your little gotcha, I think I’ll just go ahead and have your intelligence.”
Both men are instantly struck with headaches the likes of which neither could endure under normal circumstances. As soon as the pain arrives though it is converted into a deep profane pleasure. Pins and needles fill Brock’s mind as it becomes heavy. Ideas and understanding fill his mind as a euphoric warmth flows through him. Harvey had enjoyed learning without truly lifting a finger, he had flourished and gained knowledge through no effort on his part but simple absorption. Brock is overcome with the ease at which he will now flow through life. Equally is he overcome by the ecstasy within his body as it only continues to heighten.
Opposite him Harvey clutches at his head as now not only do his learned experiences at university vanish, but all of his capabilities as a student and academic. Even the pleading within his mind slows down as he feels his ability to swiftly process information breaks down. Harvey turns from the man across from him as Brock’s hands feel up and down his musculature in rapturous delight, just in time to see whatever books and tomes he had collected as trophies begin to fade into the aether along with his memories of reading them. He looks down at his hands in confusion and horror, even with his unaddled mind at full steam he could not make sense of what has befallen him. He knows this is not right.
He is unable to find any answers, though as he searches his brain he begins to find a pleasant warmth in the vacuum where there once was knowledge. While his mind has been emptied, the bulge in his crotch demands his attention, which shall likely be a constant issue now that his mind shall evermore be less than preoccupied. He feels his mouth start to fill with drool as he looks down at his cock as it almost feels larger than it should be. He almost laughs at the idea that from now on he may fully be thinking with his cock. He opens his mouth allowing drool to spill out which shocks him back to sense and he turns around to demand that Brock return this all to sense immediately.
Brock for his part is reclined in a chair just rubbing his cock over his shorts almost forgetting about what they had been doing not seconds earlier. He laughs as he sees the expression on Harvey’s face, “Woah dude sorry about that, got lost in my own mind for a second there! No wonder you had, or have rather, such an attitude problem. It all just came so easy to you didn’t it? I mean we could keep going if you want, what else do you have to lose yeah?” Harvey wipes the drool from his face and takes stock, he can still read, he is pretty confident he still passed high school, he remembers his life before whatever hell is currently happening as well as whatever this new reality is. He nods his head and pushes his erection down as it continues to rise upon seeing his roommate’s cocky repose. He answers, “let’s keep going. Your question right?”
Harvey can’t help but trace Brock’s traps as he shrugs, “If you insist lil bro. What’s my middle name?” He knows this one for sure, he would bring it out to tease his roommate as needed. Brock slams his arm down in excitement and shouts, “fucking Laurel!” then he recalls this is only half the battle, Brock must also get his wrong, “what’s mine?” Brock smirks once more and laughs as he stretches to scratch his back, his roommate hungrily staring, “you don’t have one dude”
The energy rushing between the two men is drastically different this time. Unlike the pleasurable prickles of knowledge or the soothing burn of loss there is a direct, deeper connection between the two. Brock’s grin grows wider as understands, “Oh I getcha, question’s a tie so we share the spoils Harv. Only fair that since you’ve the mind of a what, meathead? May as well have the body of one.”
Harvey watches as his roommate takes off his shirt, he feels a warmth in his chest as he stares directly at Brock’s pecs. His breath catches as he watches his roommate flex them and he feels a nervous energy begin to surge within his own. He’s never had pecs before but he feels his chest pushing, growing, into his shirt. He sees his nipples harden and grow too large to ever hide as his chest expands. His swallows to stop from drooling once more as he sees Brock pose and flex his massive biceps, forcing a burning delight down the whole of Harvey’s arms. He matches the pose of the powerful man he has spoken nothing but ill of and flexes, sweat immediately staining through his shirt as the energy and strain heats his body beyond reason.
At the same time both men drop into a crunch, there is a loud tear as the pants of both men tear as they reach the lowest point in the crunch as Harvey’s ass bursts larger and his thighs swell with strength well enough to carry his increasingly top heavy torso. Not only is Harvey to gain the muscle of a tight jock, but the masculinity expected. The cock he has been til now proud enough of pulses with his heartbeat, with each pump it gorges larger, veins thick as the ones surging down his biceps force his cock thicker and further down his strained shorts. He tears at his pants to free his bulge as his balls bloat to the size of eggs, they pull tight ass they’re exposed to the air and all the soreness, strain, and pain of his still growing body becomes agonizing delight.
Harvey’s eyes water as he struggles to even stay cogent with the pleasure and power coursing through him. He smells his new musk breaking through his senses. Through the burning bedlam across his body he feels a soothing burn as hair begins to sprout and thicken where every man should make clear his masculinity. His pubes thicken and curl beyond his waistline and his pits grow wild and begin to spread to make it clear they, nor his musk, can ever be contained.
He lies, sits, writhes, flexes, exists in nothing but pleasure for some time, no longer concerned for his lost intelligence, beyond the care of his education. His hands, larger and painted with still thickening hair, press tight against his body as he feels the new contours of his body. Each new valley and mountain is a testament to the ecstasy he shall now prioritize above all. Until his roommate’s voice breaks through the haze, “Fuck bro you’re really feeling yourself huh?” Harvey’s eyes open to see Brock’s arrogant sneer has only grown worse as he has contendly watch Harvey lavish his new corpus.
Harvey meets it with a scowl and Brock tilts his head, “Want to do one last question then, bro?” His smile grows tight as he tries not to laugh as the appellation of bro has become the paramount definition of this once genius. Harvey just nods his head, still understandably disoriented as he lies in a pool of his own sweat and pre that remains dripping directly onto the floor. Brock motions for him to ask whatever the presumably final question is but is met with a grunt and a wave of the hand. Brock grimaces slightly, “if you insist bud,” he grimaces slightly as he looks down at the man. Asshole he may have be, may still be even, surely there’s something Brock could do to fix even that. He leans to whisper the question in Harvey’s ear, “what color are my eyes.”
Between grunts, Harvey strains to look at his roommate only to find them obviously closed. His body contorts with pain and pleasure as he feels the throes of defeat and one final lose begin to seize him. He groans out through clenched teeth as his jaw widens and his brows thicken as changes already begin to work upon his mind, “don’t… know…” Brock nods and sits next to his roommate laying Harvey’s head on his lap. At the point it would be a kindness for the man to forget his life before, and that is exactly what he is to do.
Brock removes the memories and identity of the sour nerd that made life perpetually unpleasant not only for him, but anyone unlucky enough to grace his presence. His breathing speeds up as his body heat rises beyond imagination, sweat turning to steam in the cold dorm room as he shakes his head and clenches his fists. He writhes only briefly, each flex of his body a final protestation of Harvey as Brock erases even his name from his head.
After a minute of this his body goes still before he opens his eyes blearily and groans. Still lying in Brock’s lap he stretches his arms, turning to smell his impossibly rank pits before turning it into a flex as he must do anytime he raises them. Brock watches this with trepidation, unsure of who exactly his roommate is to be now before suddenly a name surges into his mind, Bull. Perfect fodder for the jerk he once was and an apt name for the behemoth lying on his lap. Testing the waters Brock pats his chest to wake him up, “Morning Bull.”
He yawns and scratches at the same stubbled face he has always known and he sits up, “urgh got a massive headache bro, must have gone pretty hard to have a hangover this bad huhuh! Wanna go grab brekkie and hit up the gym?” Brock stifles a smirk and helps his roommate up to standing, slightly surprised to see him standing taller than himself before responding, “You got it big guy, how about you get some clothes on first though right?” Bull guffaws, looking down at his hairy sweat-drenched body as he throws an arm around his roommate, cock bobbing around in the open air, still chubbed up. “What would I do without you bro huhuh!”
Brock looks to see all of Bull’s tops have changed to stringers and tanks. Where Harvey had nothing but pants Bull has piles of unwashed athletic shorts, one of which he promptly throws on, going commando. Seeing Brock watch him, Bull grabs at his crotch and juts at the door, “Come on bro! Faster we get a pump in faster we can get back here and have some fun dude.”
With that Bull again throws his arm around Brock, once more smelling his b.o. as he almost deliberately spreads it on his roommate’s neck, like an animal marking its territory. The two then off to start their day, in Bull’s mind as they always have. Brock feels his crotch grow weightier as the amble down the hall, unsure if he’s made a horrible mistake in all this. Who is he to say what is too far in acts of cosmic retribution. Brock is certain at the end of the day he and Bull are at least to have quite a bit of fun.
#male tf#mental change#masculinization#jockification#himbofication#hair growth#nerd to jock#muscle tf
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