#you are never beating the queer allegations old man

[omorinintendoswitchedition]

i think i should make a collage of hokma’s gayest quotes actually

[sinfulsalutations]

the bad batch irl headcanons: brainrot edition.

hunter

watches the boys, breaking bad, and basically anything with jk simmons in it

his top artist on his spotify wrapped was lana del rey and has been lana for 3 years straight

listens to self help audiobooks and true crime podcasts

stopped posting on tiktok because 30 year old moms kept commenting weird freaky shit

makes capcut template edits of himself

snap score is in the millions; his parents were confused on the questionnaire and instead ordered a thot son

tech

listens to playboi carti, earl sweatshirt, and ken carson. below them is classical music

never beats the “erm, actually” allegations. his friends turned him into a nerd sticker to use in conversations

reddit WARRIOR. his karma score is in the millions. he posts, no matter what, every two hours (schedules the posts if needed to). most active in the subreddits r/techtips and r/javascript

obeys the traffic laws in gta but if a pedestrian says some shit like “hey watch where you’re going asshole” he is CLOCKING that mfer

plays swipe games on tiktok religiously and will change his answers to fit better with the “lore”

watches jujutsu kaisen, has a tiktok collection dedicated entirely to gojo edits. despite that, maki is his favorite character

wrecker

his entire tiktok for you page consists of workout videos and cute animals

did the trend of tying a bow on the bicep and breaking it while he flexes

doesn’t know how to take photos of himself; watches tutorials on every social media he can find but still can’t figure it out

listens to bad bitch music. beyoncé, megan thee stallion, tinashe, doja cat, glorilla, nicki minaj, all that stuff.

comments “looked at my girl and smiled because she’s perfect” on a hot girls post

says “what the dog doin” all the time. all. the. time.

crosshair

serves cunt; serves all of the cunt

a back arching straight man; ur gay tote-bag carrying boyfriend

almost all his friends are lesbians. they take him to the queer/sapphic clubs and the chappel roan concerts

comments “why no one hating” on the most INNOCENT and PURE videos just to start arguments

is a biker boy but hates the whole “biker tok” stereotype and so he doesn’t go out on the bike anymore out of fear of being recorded without his consent

instagram notes is his main form of communication; he is an olympic ghoster

echo

his vocabulary contains “skibidi” “what the sigma” and “gyatt”

his most used “social medias,” in order, are pinterest, whatsapp, and tiktok

worked at a waffle house before he got fired for starting a fight

kpop fan. stans newjeans, tomorrow x together, and le sserrafim

the definition of “female rage”; also, indeed, serves cunt. not as much as crosshair, but serves cunt nonetheless.

has 13 daily hours of screen time. what is he doing for those hours? fuck if i know. fuck if he knows. fuck if his PHONE knows. (in reality, he leaves youtube videos playing all night and doesn’t even realize it)

[just-my-latest-hyperfixation]

HAPPY 1K!!!! That's SO exciting and well deserved!!

Might I humbly request a ficlet with...

Z. "You'll do anything for attention, won't you?"

and ⭐Celebrity AU

Thank you so much, I hope you enjoy! 🍓

I'm celebrating 1k followers, requests are open

Just how much I'll do

Rated: M

Words: 989

Tags: Celebrity AU, modern AU, rockstar Eddie, nepo baby Steve, fake dating, sexual tension, finger sucking, enemies to lovers

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“Ah, there they are,” Eddie says. “Took them long enough.” 

Steve stops chatting with the waitress to follow his gaze. Something is glinting beyond their window, in the tiny space between two cars on the other side of the dark street. A camera. The waitress hurriedly puts down their dessert and scurries off. Steve watches her go with a disappointed frown. Using the moment of distraction, Eddie reaches out across the table and tangles their fingers together. 

The frown melts into a bitchy scowl and Steve flinches like Eddie’s hand is something gross. 

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

Eddie laughs, loud and unashamed in the hushed quiet of the restaurant.

“Aw, sweetheart,” he coos. He flips their entwined hands so they’re facing the window, running his thumb over Steve’s knuckles in a slow, deliberate motion. His smile is wide and teasing as he leans over the table and into Steve’s space. “I must admit I’m a tad bit insulted. I make an effort to look nice for you, take you to the fanciest restaurant in town, and you’ve got nothing better to do than flirt with the waitress all night? Why, Stevie, do you even still love me?” 

“Quit it, Munson,” Steve snaps, trying to yank his hand away, but Eddie holds firm. A few quizzical heads turn in their direction and he’s quick to stop struggling. When he speaks again, his voice is a low hiss. “You know as well as me that this is all a publicity stunt. Don’t forget about the deal.” 

“Sure,” Eddie drawls, snatching a chocolate-coated strawberry from his plate and popping it into his mouth. The chocolate bursts between his teeth and tangy, juicy sweetness explodes all over his taste buds, making him hum in pleasure. The place may be way out of his comfort zone, markedly different from his usual dark and edgy night clubs, but at least the food is excellent. “We go on a few dates together, let our friends out there take their little photos, write their little news stories. After a few months, we break it off amicably - no hard feelings, you’ll always be special to me, yadda yadda. My label gets off my ass about my ‘out of control’ lifestyle, your old man gets to beat those completely unfounded allegations of homophobia just in time for the big election. Look how supportive he is of his queer son, after all. A true champ, a beacon of tolerance and open-mindedness, a shining example for all of us.” 

Steve, who has just taken a sip of his wine, snorts so hard, Eddie’s surprised it doesn’t come shooting out of his nose. He has a nice laugh - pretty like the rest of him, but there’s a bitter little twist to his mouth that never seems to quite disappear. Eddie catches himself wondering what his smile would look like without it. 

“Please,” Steve sneers, putting his glass back down with a bit too much force. A few drops of wine splash over the rim, staining the table cloth red. “My dad’s a bigoted old asshole and we both know it.” 

The hand that’s still tangled with Eddie’s tightens, almost painfully. A small part of Eddie imagines the things Senator Harrington must call his darling son behind closed doors. 

“Makes me wonder, though,” is what he says, “why you agreed to play along in this little farce? Why help him out if he’s such a douchebag?” 

For a second, something pokes through the facade of bored indifference on Steve’s face, something open and vulnerable and honest. Eddie wants to grab a hold of it and pull it all the way to the surface, lay it bare and never let it go again. But it’s gone as quick as it came, slipping through his fingers like mist. 

“Whatever,” Steve mutters, and the bitter curl returns to his lips. “Not like you’d get it.” 

He's right, Eddie thinks. He probably wouldn't. He hasn't seen his own sperm donor in twenty years. He doesn’t know what it's like, growing up in the shadow of an overbearing father, constantly forced to uphold your family's image, to live up to expectations. 

But something in the way Steve says it, all haughty and derisive, like Eddie isn't even worth an explanation, makes something ugly stir low in his belly. 

“Oh, I think I get it,” he says, plucking another strawberry from his plate. Steve watches with a furrowed brow how he lets it dangle between them, waving it idly about as he speaks. “I think it must be hard, constantly begging for daddy's love and acceptance, but only ever being fed the scraps. Always so eager, always so willing, but never quite good enough, you poor boy. You'll do anything for attention, won't you?” 

Steve's eyes go wide, perfect lips parting around a punched-out little sound. Eddie grins triumphantly, lifting the strawberry to his mouth. 

But he never makes it there. 

Steve surges forward, fingers closing around Eddie’s wrist. Eddie watches, heartbeat pounding in his skull, how Steve sucks the fruit into his warm, wet mouth. How pink lips slip over his fingers, all the way down to the first knuckle. Chocolate cracks and a thin rivulet of red juice trickles down Eddie's thumb. Steve darts out his tongue and catches it, never once breaking eye contact. 

“Holy shit,” someone whispers. It takes Eddie a moment to recognize his own voice. He knows it's impossible through the glass and the distance, but he swears he can hear how the camera shutter on the other side of the street goes crazy. 

Steve releases his fingers with a slick sound, tongue licking over plush lips to gather the last traces of strawberry and chocolate and Eddie still clinging to them. When he speaks, his voice is hoarse, breath cool against Eddie’s wet skin. 

“Let's get outta here … and I'll show you just how much I'll do.” 

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And then they went home and had hate sex. The end.

[smokeybrandreviews]

Snips

It looks like Kathleen Kennedy isn't finished with her scorched earth initiative against Star Wars and the fandom. After tanking Gina Carano in the most cowardly way possible, over something that could have legitimately been hashed out in a proper meeting, she and her cronies have set their sights on Rosario Dawson. This sh*t right here? This sh*t makes my booty itch real bad, man. Ahsoka Tano is my second favorite character in the entire franchise, after Vader. She is, quite literally, everything Kennedy wants in a protagonist. Female, dumb powerful, laughably inclusive, and queer coded. Ahsoka Tan absolutely is everything Kennedy wanted to make Rey and that's the problem. She is what Rey Palpatine should have been. Filoni did what Kennedy could not and, just like Favreu's Cara Dune, another stark example of Darth Kennedy's ineptitude and mishandling of the franchise. I've written at length about how the Force has always been female, how strong women are the backbone of the entire goddamn Star Was franchise, but that doesn't matter. It had to be Rey, and it very well could have been, but Kennedy was too focused on politics and not plot. Now that the pressure is on and she's been exposed, Kennedy has decided to take the entire franchise down with her, instead of admitting she was wrong the entire time.

It's wild seeing how transparent her malice is toward the entirety of Star Wars. hay sh*t with Carano didn't need to go that way, especially after hearing Gina's side of the story. All of that petty targeted and antagonism when she just wanted to do her job. It's wild to thin that there is an entire faction within Lucasfilm, focused more on sabotaging Favreu and his vision, that actually creating dope stories true to the mythos on hand. It's f*cking pathetic, especially considering how long it took Kennedy to antagonize Carano into making a fireable mistake, even if that firing wasn't sanctioned by either of the Bobs and communicated over f*cking Twatter. Carano kind of made it easy, though, with the whole Holocaust Jew comparison Getting rid of Dawson is going to be a little harder. I've looked into the allegations that made Dawson's casting so "controversial" and it's literally just a cat whining about how they were treated. By the people around Rosario, never Rosario, herself. And even then, they Dawson considered this person family, a fact i assumed her actually family reciprocated considering they flew this person out and let them into her home.

What this sounds like is a cash grab to me, a way to extort Dawson by leveraging this SJW climate where any accusation can tank your entire f*cking career. Believe all women but don't actually investigate their claims. Everyone is on deck to get Johnny Depp'd because how dare you question a survivor's truth. Yeah, that's stupid. I don't Rosario or her heart but i do know I've never heard a bad thing about this chick until this person decided to cry about being bullied. This adult person who could have just, you know, quit and moved back home to New York. This adult person who Rosario considered family and was probably ribbed as such. I mean, if you haven't seen someone in a few decades and they show up on your doorstep the opposite gender, you're definitely going to say something about that. And, again, according to the "victim" Rosario wasn't even the person antagonizing them, the people around her were. Dawson ,herself, wasn't even home most of the time because she was off filming. Like, what? More than that, Rosario is perfectly cast as Ahsoka Tan, the fan front runner for the role, and she f*cking killed it. There's no way Disney doesn't see that. Dawson, for the most part, aligns with Kennedy's politics outside of this one, easily debunked, episode so she won't be able to bamboozle Dawson into making a mistake like she did with Carano. Plus, Ahsoka, as a character, has way more clout than Cara Dune ever did. She is Darth Vader's only apprentice for chrissake.

Tano is a fan favorite character who has proven to move merch long before Kennedy got her clutches on the franchise. Disney is aware of how much Ahsoka is worth. They're also aware that her episode is the second highest rated among audiences, only outranked by the finale and that was only because f*cking Jedi Knight Luke Sywalker showed up in the last five minutes. Put that into context; The only reason why Ahsoka's Kurosawa inspired, beautifully shot, perfectly cast, absolutely fantastic, spotlight episode, isn't the top ranked among the show so far, is the fact that we finally got to see a version of Luke almost four decades in the making. It took thirty-seven years of raw anticipation to usurp Ahsoka from the top spot. Rosario Dawson has a lot to do with that. She IS Tano. She looks the part and is a fan, herself, so she brought her best to the role. Seeing Rosario in full Togruta makeup felt just as right as seeing Tano in Clone Wars. Sh*t didn't skip a beat.

Let's be real, as popular as Cara Dune was at the time, she was nowhere near as loved as Tano. As dope a character as Dune was and definitely could have been she didn't have the same pedigree as Ahsoka Tano. Cara Dune was vulnerable making Gina Carano expendable. Ahsoka Tano is not which means its going to take a whole lot to get rid of Rosario. Beyond that, Ahsoka Tano reaches across that gender barrier and is loved by both boys and girls, young and old, giving her that rare ability of selling to the entire audience, according to the clueless corporate bunch. And Shareholders love money. Getting rid of Rosario would f*ck up the money WAY more than getting rid of Dune and them same Shareholders are already real upset over that f*ck up. Curious what they have to say about that on the fourth. Good luck sabotaging Favreau after that, Darth Kennedy. Go suck a lemon you bitter b*tch!

[sublimerhymes]

The Oozlum Bird by W.T. Goodge

It was on the Diamantina Where the alligators grow, And the natives’ allegations Ain’t particularly slow. He was old and he was ugly, He was dirty, he was low; He could lie like Ananias, And they called him “Ginger Joe.”

He was wood-and-water joey At the “Jackeroo’s Retreat,” Where the swagmen and the shearers And the bound’ry riders meet; And he’d pitch ’em lots of “fairies,” But the best I ever heard Was McPherson’s trip to Sydney On the famous Oozlum Bird!

“You can talk about yer racehorse And the pace as he can go, But it just amounts to crawlin’, Nothink else!” said Ginger Joe.

“And these cycle blokes with pacers, You can take my bloomin’ word, They’re a funeral procession To the blinded Oozlum Bird!

“Do yez know Marengo station? It’s away beyond the Peak, Over sixty miles from Birdsville As you go to Cooper’s Creek, Which the blacks call Kallokoopah, And they tell you that Lake Eyre Was one time an inland ocean. Well, the Oozlum Bird is there!

“Bet yer boots it ain’t no chicken, It’s as big and wide across As the bird what beats the steamships, What’s it called? The albatross! That’s the bird! And old King Mulga Used to tell the boys and me They were there when Central ‘Stralia Was a roarin’ inland sea!

“I was cook at old Marengo When McTavish had the run, And his missus died and left him With a boy—the only one. Jock McPherson was his nephew, Lately came from Scotland, too, Been sent out to get “experience” As a kind of Jackeroo!

“Well, this kid of old McTavish Was a daisy. Strike me blue! There was nothing, that was mischief, That the kiddy would n’t do! But he was a kindly kinchen And a reg’lar little brick, And we all felt mighty sorry When we heard that he was sick!

But, McTavish! Well, I reckon I am something on the swear, But I never heard sich language As McTavish uttered there; For he cursed the blessed country, And the cattle and the sheep, And the station-hands and shearers Till yer blinded flesh would creep

“It was something like a fever That the little bloke had got, And McTavish he remembered (When he’d cursed and swore a lot), That a chemist down in Sydney Had a special kind of stuff Which would cure the kiddy’s fever In a jiffy, right enough!

“So he sends me into Birdsville On the fastest horse we had, And I has to wire to Sydney For the medsin for the lad. They would send it by the railway, And by special pack from Bourke; It would take a week to do it And be mighty slippery work.

“Well, I gallops into Birdsville And I sends the wire all right; And I looks around the township, Meanin’ stopping for the night. I was waitin’ in the bar-room— This same bar-room—for a drink When a wire comes from McPherson, And from Sydney! Strike me pink!

“I had left him at Marengo On the morning of that day! He was talking to McTavish At the time I came away! And yet here’s a wire from Sydney! And it says: ‘Got here all right. Got the medsin. Am just leaving. Will be home again to-night!’

“Well, I thought I had the jim-jams, Yes, I did; for, spare me days! How in thunder had McPherson Got to Sydney, anyways? But he’d got there, that was certain, For the wire was plain and clear. I could never guess conundrums, So I had another beer.

“In the morning, bright and early, I was out and saddled up, And away to break the record Of old Carbine for the Cup. And I made that cuddy gallop As he’d never done before; And, so-help-me-bob, McPherson Was there waiting at the door!

“And the kid was right as ninepence, Sleepin’ peaceful in his bunk, And McTavish that delighted He’d made everybody drunk! And McPherson says: ‘Well, Ginger, You did pretty well, I heard; But you must admit you’re beaten, Joe—I rode the Oozlum Bird!’

“Said he’d often studied science Long before he’d came out here, And he’d struck a sort of notion, Which you’ll think is mighty queer— That the earth rolls round to eastward And that birds, by rising high, Might just stop and travel westward, While the earth was rolling by!

“So he saddled up the Oozlum, Rose some miles above the plain, Let the Earth turn underneath him Till he spotted the Domain! Then came down, and walked up George-street, Got the stuff and wired to me; Rose again and reached Marengo Just as easy as could be!

“ ‘But,’ says I, ‘if you went westward Just as simple as you say, How did you get back?’ He answered: ‘Oh, I came the other way!’ So in six-and-twenty hours, Take the yarn for what it’s worth, Jock McPherson and the Oozlum Had been all around the earth!

“It’s a curious bird, the Oozlum, And a bird that’s mighty wise, For it always flies tail-first to Keep the dust out of its eyes! And I heard that since McPherson Did that famous record ride, They won’t let a man get near ’em, Could n’t catch one if you tried!

“If you don’t believe the story, And some people don’t, yer know; Why the blinded map’ll prove it, Strike me fat!” said Ginger Joe. “Look along the Queensland border, On the South Australian side, There’s this township! christened Birdsville, ‘Cause of Jock McPherson’s ride!

[noctem-novelle]

This February, celebrate Black History Month with Black authors!

Culture is important, whether it’s your own to celebrate or someone else’s that you can learn about and appreciate. In the last few years, we’ve seen a steady increase in people of colour, LGBT communities, non-Christian religions, and non-European cultures represented in young adult and middle-grade fiction. While this is a great improvement and definitely a step in the right direction, people of colour are still underrepresented. We can do more to make sure that authors of colour are seen and heard. The following list, while by no means exhaustive, is a selection of excellent YA and MG novels written by Black authors*. This month, take some time to explore their stories.

*This list appears in no particular order and is not intended to be read as though any one book is superior to another.

1. The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas (Young Adult)

When sixteen-year-old Starr Carter witnesses the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend, she must decide whether to lie low or to join the protesters who seek justice for Khalil. A touching, timely, and often raw story about a girl who finds herself when she feels most lost, it’s no wonder this book has spent more than 100 weeks on the New York Times Best Sellers list.

2. Riding Chance by Christine Kendall (Young Adult)

Based on Philadelphia’s Work to Ride program, this novel follows a young man who gets into some trouble at school and winds up doing community service at the Chamounix Stables in Fairmount Park. There, he learns to play polo, an intense sport that teaches perseverance and focus. This book really hit home for me, having spent most of my childhood at polo matches with WTR. In real life, Work to Ride provides underprivileged children and teenagers in Philadelphia with constructive extracurricular activities, peer mentorship, and even college enrollment assistance. To learn more about Work to Ride, check our their website or Facebook page!

3. Let’s Talk About Love by Claire Kann (Young Adult/New Adult)

Let’s talk about the amazing QPoC rep in this book! Alice, who is asexual and biromantic, is determined to spend her post-breakup summer on a tv binge. She definitely does not intend to fall for her co-worker, Takumi. Whoops. This book is a mostly-fluffy slow-burn romance, full of nerdy pop-culture references. If you remember tumblr circa 2011, this book is for you.

4. Garvey’s Choice by Nikki Grimes (Middle Grade)

Garvey’s father has always wanted him to be an athlete, but Garvey is just not interested. When his only friend convinces him to join their school chorus, Garvey finds confidence and a new way to communicate to his distant dad. Told in verse, this is a heartfelt novel about one boy’s transformation through music.

5. American Street by Ibi Zoboi (Young Adult)

In her debut novel, Ibi Zoboi draws on her experience as a Haitian immigrant to tell the story of Fabiola, a young woman whose mother is detained by U.S. Immigration when they emigrate from Port-au-Prince to Detroit. This book explores the cost of the “American dream” with a mix of family drama, romance, and a hint of magical realism.

6. The Poet X by Elizabeth Acevedo (Young Adult)

Xiomara feels both invisible and too visible in a world that doesn’t want to hear her but is happy to objectify her. To express herself and to find some relief from her religious mother’s strict expectations, she turns to slam poetry. This novel-in-verse includes romance, wavering faith, and feminism.

7. Piecing Me Together by Renee Watson (Young Adult)

This powerful novel features a young woman who is determined to make it out of her impoverished neighbourhood. Jade’s mother taught her to take every opportunity she’s offered, so every day she takes the bus across town to a private school where there are plenty of opportunities, even if she doesn’t quite fit in. But some opportunities are less welcome than others, like the chance to join a mentorship program for “at-risk” girls. Sick of being singled out as someone who needs help, Jade hopes to find some autonomy and to stay true to herself.

8. Little & Lion by Brandy Colbert (Young Adult)

Suzette is home in Los Angeles for the summer and she isn’t sure she ever wants to go back to boarding school. Between supporting her bipolar brother, Lionel, and trying not to think about her clandestine relationship with her roommate, she’s got a pretty full plate. Unfortunately, she’s also falling for the same girl that Lionel likes. When Lionel’s mental illness sends him spiraling, Suzette must face her past to help him. This family features a blended family, Black Jewish characters, and a queer woman of colour.

9. Courage by Barbara Binns (Middle Grade)

T’Shawn has done his best to help out since his father’s death, but life gets complicated when his brother Lamont comes home from a stint in prison. T’Shawn finds peace on the diving board, and earns a scholarship to join a prestigious team at a local swim club. But when the neighbourhood crime rate starts to rise, T starts to think that he and Lamont may never put their pieces back together.

10. Monster by Walter Dean Myers (Young Adult)

A murdered drugstore clerk, a trial, and a young man in crisis. Monster is the story of Steve Harmon, amateur filmmaker and alleged murderer. To cope with the trial, Steve writes down the proceedings as if it were a film script, but as he tries to tell his own story, the truth starts to feel a little hazy. This one has also been adapted as a graphic novel.

11. All-American Boys by Jason Reynolds (Young Adult)

Rashad wasn’t stealing, but people sure seem to think he was. After he drops a bag of chips and a police officer beats him for it, Rashad is stuck in a hospital bed while the nation debates his character. Meanwhile, Quinn, a white boy who witnessed the beating, comes to learn that racism didn’t end with the Civil Rights Movement.

12. Akata Witch by Nnedi Okorafor (Young Adult)

Sunny is an albino girl living in Nigeria. Her skin tone often makes her an outsider, but she soon finds herself drawn into a community of magic users called Leopard People. Together with her new friends, Sunny is tasked with tracking down a killer known for maiming children.

13. The Red Pencil by Andrea Davis Pinkney (Middle Grade)

Amira is finally twelve and hopes to start school, but her life is turned upside down when the Janjaweed militia attacks her Sudanese village and her family must make the long and difficult journey to a refugee camp. Life at the camp is hard, but when an aid worker gives her a pencil and paper, Amira’s world begins to expand.

14. One Crazy Summer by Rita Williams-Garcia (Middle Grade)

Delphine Gaither and her two younger sisters travel from Brooklyn to Oakland to spend the summer with a mother they barely know. Imagine their surprise when she sends them to a Black Panther summer camp. Set in 1968, this historical fiction novel explores family dynamics and the importance of sisterhood.

15. Brown Girl Dreaming by Jacqueline Woodson (Middle Grade)

In powerfully emotional poetry, Woodson tells the story of her childhood and what it was like to grow up Black in the 1960s and 70s. This novel-in-verse won the National Book Award and the Coretta Scott King Award.

16. Roll of Thunder, Hear My Cry by Mildred D. Taylor (Middle Grade)

Between the depression and threats from the night riders, the Logan family has had a tough year. Cassie doesn’t see why her family’s land is so important, but as she becomes more aware of the way their white neighbours treat them, she soon comes to understand that the family’s strength comes from having their own place in the world. This book tackles the ugly reality of racism in the deep south from the perspective of a precocious nine-year-old. It can be hard to stomach at times, but I think that just makes it more important.

17. Zora and Me by Victoria Bond & T.R. Simon (Middle Grade)

Part historical fiction and part small-town mystery, this fictional imagining of Zora Neale Hurston’s early days sees the author as a young girl, exercising her skills as a storyteller. When one of Zora’s tales seems to come true and a man winds up dead, she and her friend Carrie find that things in their little town are not as peaceful as they appear.

18. Blended by Sharon M. Draper (Middle Grade)

Every since her parents’ divorce, Isabella has felt torn in two. Two houses, two families, two races. Switching between her parents, also means switching between two different identities. How can she ever feel whole when she’s constantly split in half? This book examines the life of a biracial girl, and doesn’t shy away from addressing exoticism and the (PG) fetishisation of mixed-race people.

19. Black Enough: Stories of Being Young and Black in America edited by Ibi Zoboi (Young Adult)

This contemporary anthology delves into the many-faceted lives of Black teens in the United States. Popular authors from a wide variety of backgrounds have contributed their voices to show that being young and Black in America is not just one singular experience, but a constellation.

20. The Parker Inheritance by Varian Johnson (Middle Grade)

A hidden letter and a summer mystery are what await Candace when she pokes through an old box in the attic. With the help of her neighbour, Brandon, she deciphers the letter’s clues in the hopes of discovering a forgotten fortune. This book is perfect for readers who like a good puzzle.

[nightcoremoon]

Callout post: me

lying, manipulative, hold grudges, constantly paranoid, would absolutely 100% check out a teenager if nobody was looking because "it's a harmless crime", liar, cycle through idealization and devaluation, 'sick of fat people trying to be the next civil rights issue and making it that much harder to get civil rights for people who are ACTUALLY oppressed like gee idk poc and muslims and the mentally ill and queer people', frequently fantasizes about committing violent acts against people I rationalize they deserve it including family members, untruthful, attention whore, pedantic AND pretentious, tells lies, doesn't believe in one sister's claim of sexual assault (went to smoke weed with the alleged perpetrator), UNAPOLOGETICALLY AGAINST ASEXUAL EXCLUSIONISM (LITERALLY FUCK YOU DUMBASS FOURTEEN YEAR OLDS WHO SHRIEK THAT QUEER IS A SLUR, SHUT YOUR GODDAM FUCKING WHORE MOUTHS YOU DUMBASSES AND GO THE FUCK OUTSIDE OR READ A BOOK), would absolutely punch a child over an insignificant internet argument, secretly sought out sexual pleasure from two friendly seemingly platonic encounters with two girls I just met within twenty four hours, overreacts to the slightest provocations and has bitches at or vagueposted at several people who did not deserve it, has used mental illness and physical handicap to evade trouble from being late for work because video games and laziness and excessive sleep, has spent maybe a thousand dollars on fast food in 2018 alone, evades bills for medical care from an actually great clinic, lying sack of garbage, gave up on calling out family's bigotry and is now an accessory to prejudice, despises terfs predominantly for their refusal to fuck me because of being trans and yet meanwhile would not engage in sexual relationship with another trans woman or cis man unless reeeeeeeeally drunk, can and will blame being sexually assaulted as a child which probably didn't even happen because I don't think I remember it, unabashed furry, probably as addicted to video games and masturbation AND LIES as I almost was to alcohol, pretended to have almost been an alcoholic just to "win" facebook arguments about addiction, doesn't give a fuck my dad almost died from heroin JUST because he's a *little* homophobic and racist and classist and xenophobic because of a christian upbringing, would literally fucking murder him if he EVER PUTS HIS HANDS ON ME AGAIN, only slightly depressed because of laziness and a lack of drive and ungrateful to my family because hey they didn't kick me out for being trans so HEY THATS SUPPORTIVE ENOUGH FOR SOME OTHER PEOPLE SO WHY CANT I BE HAPPY WITH THAT, legitimately salty about ~the friendzone~ and just makes fun of incels because everybody else does, takes the moral high ground for not being a misogynist even though I don't deserve a pat on the back a lap dance and a blowjob for not hating women, overly sensitive about stupid things, thinking about faking having a trigger warning for more discourse credit, HUUUGE ASSHOLE to men I deem unattractive for no other reason than every single ugly fat guy I've ever met has been an asshole, rationalizes it after the fact because they eventually say something shitty because all men are terrible, probably a little bit of a cisnormative misandrist because trans men tend to be much better people, finds trans men attractive (specifically and significantly more so than cis men) so must clearly be fetishizing them, relatively okay with people referring to me as deadnamed and the wrong pronouns so probably just lying about being trans to everyone including myself, not 100% okay with the hijab for 'no reason other than all organized religion is evil and opposed to its mandate and the shame it forces on many women in many situations the exact same way I'm opposed to no sex before marriage and wives being subservient to their husbands and treating women as property in the torah and quran alike because ITS ALL BRAINWASHING' so is clearly not unlearning islamophobia and doesn't want to let that go, hypocrite because I believe in the basics of judeochristianity

and loathe atheism and atheists entirely because their smugness and smarm literally sets my blood pressure through the roof of what is safe and normal and yet claim to hate all organized religion, mansplains yet gets so pissed off when other people mansplain to me, judgmental of other cultures because they don't have the exact same values that I have, james gunn apologist, talks and talks and talks about anarchosocialism all damn day but would beat the shit out of a coworker for leaving me to do things because they're lazy because "any job worth doing is worth doing well" and other capitalismisms, literally couldn't give less of a fuck that his mother is dying because people die but it's no reason to make my life slightly harder and making me work hard when I work because BOO HOO MY LEGS HURT FROM THE LITERALLY MOST MILD CASE OF MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY I COULD'VE BEEN BORN WITH, hasn't actually performed real suicide attempt ever but still claims to have done so to attain sympathy that may result in physical affection, countless other shitty terrible things that yeah I recognize are bad but CANT SEEM TO CARE BECAUSE I HAVE DEPRESSION... WHICH IS THE WEAKEST FUCKING EXCUSE IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE GODDAMN WORLD

I am not a good person, okay?

I just pretend to be sometimes.

I'm sick of doing it, I'm sick of trying to do well and earn people's approval by doing and saying the right things only to just be ignored which is a step up from receiving many anons that hey, never actually told me to kill myself, but did take my words out of context to paint me as a racist. I am not the kind of racist who would vote for trump and march with the kkk. that is one of very few good things I can say about myself. but I'm an arrogant, violent, and angry opinionated perverted manipulative judgmental lying asshole. I'm not a good person. I have let myself fall so much and I deserve to be alone. my only connections to people were built on personal gain and I swear to myself that I do love them but those feelings fall away in direct correlation to how much they interact with me. I could love you to the point of obsession and stalking and one month later be completely and totally disinterested. I'm a bigot who pretends to not be bigoted and just parrots what other people say not because I believe it but because it's the right thing to say, and I only say what the right thing is to say because whenever I say a good thing something good will happen to me and if I say a bad thing something bad happens to me. it's all just self preservation, nothing else at all. but now I'm at the end of a road of just trying to do good and I'm alone. out of the only two friends that I can really say that I have left, one is far away and trapped in a guilt spiral that I caused by being too clingy, and the other has been behaving in a way my mind has decoded as defensive around me which makes sense as I have been very... the best way to describe it would be the way a dudebro incel interacts with any person who possesses a vagina/breasts but sneakier. in both relationships I've pushed my own wants and desires in extremis... I can't for the life of me recall the last time I have ever offered something in return other than my own company or paying for a meal at a restaurant or I guess transportation. and instead of sex I just want them to express even the slightest bit of intimate platonic physical affection towards me but that's still a lot to offer someone who has clearly expressed the existence of a sexual and maybe something near the realms of romantic in one of the cases physical attraction because for this aspec it's practically the same fucking thing.

and I've manipulated them to attain this goal. at this point my shit brain has considered just fucking going to town on my wrists with a razor blade to draw sympathy so that I'll get a hug or something beyond just a simply hello/goodbye, and finding a way to induce tears to concoct a sob story to reach the same end result, and one time very briefly via threat and intimidation so you can clearly see that I've gone far too into irredeemable territory. I've been playing and replaying cry of fear because it's just too similar to my own issues and the first ending where he just kills everyone he loves and then himself... I see me in that ending. and it scares me so much more than the sprinting screaming twitching one hit kill chainsaw guy ever will. I don't want that to be me, I want to change something, but I just can't get the help that I need. I had hoped to go for a domino effect, where if I could be cuddled for like five minutes or something, I'd have the energy to be more hygienic, which would make me feel capable enough to take on two jobs, which would get me the cash flow I need to pay my bills and take care of my hormones, which would put me in the headspace necessary to effectively use psychological help, which would let me get over my illnesses and actually become a more successful person instead of the pathetic husk I am here in non-fantasy land.

but that won't happen.

I'm just sitting here in the dark angsting about how nobody will touch me in a way that would produce oxytocin, and it's making me so sick, so physically sick, that it's affecting my brain too. I'm in pain, nauseous, vengeful, spiteful, paranoid, judgmental, and lonely. I'm stuck and I can't even kill myself because my mind wants me to stay alive and suffer through all of this because "oh it gets better" people have been saying that for well over half of my life. I was six or seven years old when I asked my mother to kill me, and that same level of desperation and bitterness has only gotten worse as time goes by. when does it get better? I'll tell you when it gets better, after I'm in prison or comatose or forty five years old with a cane and bad eyes and high blood pressure and lung cancer from all the secondhand smoke I've breathed in my life. when my life is over, that's when it gets better. I DONT WANT THAT. I WANT A NORMAL FUCKING LIFE RIGHT NOW. I WANT NORMAL FRIENDSHIPS AND A NORMAL HOME AND A NORMAL EDUCATION AND A NORMAL CAREER AND A NORMAL FAMILY. or at least I want someone to hold me and make me feel like I'm not so horrible and broken that I can't be touched.

but that's too much to ask for.

[smokeybrand]

Snips

It looks like Kathleen Kennedy isn't finished with her scorched earth initiative against Star Wars and the fandom. After tanking Gina Carano in the most cowardly way possible, over something that could have legitimately been hashed out in a proper meeting, she and her cronies have set their sights on Rosario Dawson. This sh*t right here? This sh*t makes my booty itch real bad, man. Ahsoka Tano is my second favorite character in the entire franchise, after Vader. She is, quite literally, everything Kennedy wants in a protagonist. Female, dumb powerful, laughably inclusive, and queer coded. Ahsoka Tan absolutely is everything Kennedy wanted to make Rey and that's the problem. She is what Rey Palpatine should have been. Filoni did what Kennedy could not and, just like Favreu's Cara Dune, another stark example of Darth Kennedy's ineptitude and mishandling of the franchise. I've written at length about how the Force has always been female, how strong women are the backbone of the entire goddamn Star Was franchise, but that doesn't matter. It had to be Rey, and it very well could have been, but Kennedy was too focused on politics and not plot. Now that the pressure is on and she's been exposed, Kennedy has decided to take the entire franchise down with her, instead of admitting she was wrong the entire time.

It's wild seeing how transparent her malice is toward the entirety of Star Wars. hay sh*t with Carano didn't need to go that way, especially after hearing Gina's side of the story. All of that petty targeted and antagonism when she just wanted to do her job. It's wild to thin that there is an entire faction within Lucasfilm, focused more on sabotaging Favreu and his vision, that actually creating dope stories true to the mythos on hand. It's f*cking pathetic, especially considering how long it took Kennedy to antagonize Carano into making a fireable mistake, even if that firing wasn't sanctioned by either of the Bobs and communicated over f*cking Twatter. Carano kind of made it easy, though, with the whole Holocaust Jew comparison Getting rid of Dawson is going to be a little harder. I've looked into the allegations that made Dawson's casting so "controversial" and it's literally just a cat whining about how they were treated. By the people around Rosario, never Rosario, herself. And even then, they Dawson considered this person family, a fact i assumed her actually family reciprocated considering they flew this person out and let them into her home.

What this sounds like is a cash grab to me, a way to extort Dawson by leveraging this SJW climate where any accusation can tank your entire f*cking career. Believe all women but don't actually investigate their claims. Everyone is on deck to get Johnny Depp'd because how dare you question a survivor's truth. Yeah, that's stupid. I don't Rosario or her heart but i do know I've never heard a bad thing about this chick until this person decided to cry about being bullied. This adult person who could have just, you know, quit and moved back home to New York. This adult person who Rosario considered family and was probably ribbed as such. I mean, if you haven't seen someone in a few decades and they show up on your doorstep the opposite gender, you're definitely going to say something about that. And, again, according to the "victim" Rosario wasn't even the person antagonizing them, the people around her were. Dawson ,herself, wasn't even home most of the time because she was off filming. Like, what? More than that, Rosario is perfectly cast as Ahsoka Tan, the fan front runner for the role, and she f*cking killed it. There's no way Disney doesn't see that. Dawson, for the most part, aligns with Kennedy's politics outside of this one, easily debunked, episode so she won't be able to bamboozle Dawson into making a mistake like she did with Carano. Plus, Ahsoka, as a character, has way more clout than Cara Dune ever did. She is Darth Vader's only apprentice for chrissake.

Tano is a fan favorite character who has proven to move merch long before Kennedy got her clutches on the franchise. Disney is aware of how much Ahsoka is worth. They're also aware that her episode is the second highest rated among audiences, only outranked by the finale and that was only because f*cking Jedi Knight Luke Sywalker showed up in the last five minutes. Put that into context; The only reason why Ahsoka's Kurosawa inspired, beautifully shot, perfectly cast, absolutely fantastic, spotlight episode, isn't the top ranked among the show so far, is the fact that we finally got to see a version of Luke almost four decades in the making. It took thirty-seven years of raw anticipation to usurp Ahsoka from the top spot. Rosario Dawson has a lot to do with that. She IS Tano. She looks the part and is a fan, herself, so she brought her best to the role. Seeing Rosario in full Togruta makeup felt just as right as seeing Tano in Clone Wars. Sh*t didn't skip a beat.

Let's be real, as popular as Cara Dune was at the time, she was nowhere near as loved as Tano. As dope a character as Dune was and definitely could have been she didn't have the same pedigree as Ahsoka Tano. Cara Dune was vulnerable making Gina Carano expendable. Ahsoka Tano is not which means its going to take a whole lot to get rid of Rosario. Beyond that, Ahsoka Tano reaches across that gender barrier and is loved by both boys and girls, young and old, giving her that rare ability of selling to the entire audience, according to the clueless corporate bunch. And Shareholders love money. Getting rid of Rosario would f*ck up the money WAY more than getting rid of Dune and them same Shareholders are already real upset over that f*ck up. Curious what they have to say about that on the fourth. Good luck sabotaging Favreau after that, Darth Kennedy. Go suck a lemon you bitter b*tch!