#you are DEFINITELY allowed to blaze thos post for me if you want
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kansasjustgotgayer · 6 days ago
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I need help to pay for my top surgery 🏳️‍⚧️✂️
I am trying to get my top surgery done as soon as possible in order to get ahead of any anti-trans legislation that may keep me from doing so in the coming years.
Unfortunately this means that since my insurance wont cover it, I have to raise and save that money myself. If you can donate any amount or share this to someone who can, it would help me TREMENDOUSLY.
https://gofund.me/e67a04cf
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my-current-obsession · 2 years ago
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I mean, to be fair, FE was never heavy about Romance. I know Awakening and so on changed it to be more heavy on w the pair ups and such, but thats like... 4 out of 17(?) FE games. I think Engage(ironically) was trying to dial back to the older style of FE. If you wants romani, why not play a dating sim game and not FE?(i dont mean that in a rude way, that's a general question. Sorry if it does tho)
No offense taken at all! I'll admit, Awakening was my introduction to the series (and I'd probably still call it my favorite), so I'm definitely more used to supports/endings that are... pretty dang romantic. Even more than finding out who *I* liked most and S-ranking them, I LOVED playing matchmaker with my entire army. And since Fates and 3 Houses very much kept up that trend I kind of expected it to be a mainstay of the series moving forward.
That said I HAVE gone back and played two of the older games - Blazing Sword and Sacred Stones, and while they're definitely not as romance-focused as the newer games... honestly I STILL think they've got more romance than what Engage gave us. It's hard to see a lot of it organically since the older games pretty much force you to pick a small set of units and stick with them, plus you're limited to 5 supports per person per playthrough. With no guarantee of a paired ending if you don't get an A rank, and maybe even then there's either no paired ending or it's platonic. But when you're lucky enough to FIND a pair that was given a romantic support and ending... yeah, the chain or at least the ending is fairly obviously romantic! There's flirting, the ending generally outright states they marry or "stay together" forever.
I came out of those games adoring Eliwood/Ninian, Kent/Lyn (though I won't deny her relationship with Florina is pretty eyebrow raising), Raven/Lucius, Cormag/Tana, Ephraim/L'Arachel, and Forde/Eirika, among others.
I actually care way more about the loss of matchmaking, but IMO if Engage was going to still allow the player to romance someone... they really should have let those scenes and endings be more romantic. Otherwise what's the point? And as someone in the replies of that post noted... yeah, it's a bit unfortunate and weird that they chose the game where you can finally S rank ANYONE regardless of gender to really tone down the romance.
And for the record, I play plenty of romantic visual novels, as well as other series with "dating sim" aspects, such as Persona or Stella Glow (a HIGHLY underrated game). So it's not like I need to get my romance fix from FE specifically; I just was used to it being more romance focused and am a bit disappointed. But I initially checked out Awakening because I was intrigued by the turn-based strategy gameplay and its art style, and I'm still fully onboard the series for that, too! Outside of actual visual novels, any game I play with romance elements I'm primarily into for the plot and/or gameplay, but the romance is ALWAYS a plus for me. And since it was a pretty huge part of my FE experience for Awakening, Fates, and 3 Houses, I miss it here.
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blazethecheeto · 3 years ago
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100 Followers Q & A!! 🎉🎉
Link to Pt. 2: https://blaze5681.tumblr.com/post/682070345418784768/100-followers-q-a-continued
I have officially reached 100 followers!! 🥳🥳🥳 Although I know that isn't a lot compared to people with like 100000 followers or whatever, I'm happy with what I have 🤗
I got lots of questions for my Q & A so thanks to my mutuals and some anons for these questions! I'm excited to answer them and for you to get to know me more.
Alright without further ado, let's get into the first question :D
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This is such a great question!! So for me, I need a fantasy or very cool, interesting plot. I love intricate lore and stories so I need that and maybe some magic too for me to become interested. I also want lots of beautiful and emotional scenes, with characters that have development and are awesome enough for me to get attached to them. If I'm not attached to the characters, I'm probably not going o be interested in the show.
For ships, I just found out I have a pattern in most of my ships- oof. Cute, optimistic side character cinnamon roll who's hopelessly pining for the emo dark, angwy, main character with trauma. Like it's all my ships in a nutshell. Kazper, Scorptra, Entrapdak, Huntdric, Caitvi, and more I can't think of right now haha!
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I ask myself this every day Anon, thank you for that. Well it's not really any of your business but... I identify as an ON FIRE GARBAGE CAN-
I am non binary, I sometimes refer myself to genderfluid bc my gender be switching every day, and I'm a bi aegosexual hooman.
Although it probably isn't permanent, and sexuality is fluid, this isn't permanent. But it's true to me for now, and that's good :D
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THE ENTHUSIASM IS UNCANNY- well 🎶here is a list of my faVoUriTe tHinGs 🎶
Colour: Orange!
Animal: CAT
Outfit: uhh, I don't really pay much attention to my wardrobe, but I guess this really awesome hoodie I got:
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Movie: I'm saving that for another person who asked that question :)
Tv Show: This is so hard bc there are so many amazing ones. For now, it's the Owl House. Truly some of the greatest humor, animation, and characters in a show I've seen.
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...uh-
Well I can answer that to an extent? I guess? I look like what I put in many of my picrews. I'm Vietnamese, and have black, shoulder length hair with an orange streak in the front. I'm pretty short too.
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Finally, a normal anon question. There actually is a story behind it! I always called myself Blaze. It was always my username when I first started playing video games, and when I started making accounts. I don't know, I've always liked fire and the name sounded very cool to me.
Once I have the courage to come out, I would definitely pick Blaze as my new name as well :) It's so cool and many people already call me it so why not?
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Well Anon, I am so glad you like The Price of a Heart but you see, I have this stupid thing called PROCRASTINATION. Lol I'm like over here staring a blank doc sinking in my chair waiting for it to write itself. Um, my schedule has collapsed onto itself and then exploded into flames so now a new chapter could come out in a week or in like 2 weeks, who knows. Thanks for enjoying my fic tho, it means a lot :)
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Okay, you're gonna laugh, but lately, I've actually been discovering and re-listening to Equestria Girls music. I used to love those movies as a kid and I just decided to listen to some songs again then I found myself just jamming out to songs titled 'Rainbow Rocks' like wHAT-
(But seriously, those songs are fire, especially Under Our Spell and Unleash the Magic 🤩)
..And damn it only 10 images are allowed on this post. So I'll continue in another post! Hope you enjoyed Part 1.
I'll tag the people that asked me questions here: @lilisouless @reyraccoon @all the anons lol I don't know who you are
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seb-owns-these-tatas · 5 years ago
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Witcher Of The Night (Chapter 4)
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THIS IS MODERN ERA READER WHO WOKE UP IN THE DIMENSION OF THE WITCHER.
CHAPTER 3
Characters: Geralt of Rivia x small!Naive!Reader
Summary: Ciri wanted chicken and so she gets one. Y/N needed warmth amongst the cold weather in the Forest of Kaedwan and she'd received more than a warmth for her body as it traveled straight to her heart; warming her soul. Even getting some sort of comfort from the witcher himself. Other than that, Geralt had a lead on where the sorceress was. Though, right now he needed her to help you Plus, he also had other options other than that. 
Warnings: FULL OF Y/N AND GERALT FLUFF. ❤ Geralt is an asshole at first because of certain reasons. 😂 Blood and animal killing in this one. Smiling, soft Geralt, tho still having that stoic expression of his of course. Gotta write him completely in character. 😂 Also, a Hirikka is here and will be on the next chapter!
Words: 3,900+
A/N: There's a part 2 for this chapter. It'll be a chapter 4.1 but will be posted after 2-3 days. ^u^ I couldn't put them together because it'll be 8-9k words long. 😅😂 Sorry, if I write long ass chapters and the pace is still slow. I need to develop their characters, relationship and such. The places said here are from the game however it isn’t accurate and I just made my own direction. Like how I try to make my life go in the right path but failing and actually walking on the wrong path. LMAO. Also, I’m making a masterlist for WOTN! 🤗
TAGLIST IS STILL OPEN FOR THIS ONE! Heehee! Don’t forget to REBLOG, COMMENT OR GIVE FEEDBACK IF YOU DID LOVE THIS CHAPTER! IT’LL MAKE ME SMILE! 
Disclaimer: PNG's used in edits are not mine even the GIF's too. However, the edits and oneshots are definitely from moi. Characters, places and said monsters aren't from moi as well.
MY WORKS ARE NOT NOT NOT NOT NOOOOOOT TO BE POSTED ON ANY OTHER WEBSITES. My official username in Wattpad is “TATATHEPOTATO” and that’s the only other site I have for writing aside from Tumblr. Thank you, Tater tots!
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"Do you not...have cars, Geralt? Or motorcycles?"
You've panted like you were having a marathon, palms falling on your knees as you took a breather; seeing a small cottage on the far end of the shallow path in the forest.
It was a smaller house that had a fence with chickens, goats and pigs segregated by kind. The home was a sandy shade of yellow and a slip of brown which was also made just like how Geralt's have been.
No answer was given to you other than how he was hauling Roach back to look at you who were walking along side with him; not bothering to even ask you for a ride. It's not like you were hoping he would. Based on the change of mood he'd gotten, you were sure he won't lend you his horse to lessen your difficulty in traveling bare foot.
You've already asked what his horse's name was. He simply answered with the word 'Roach', allowing you to touch the horse as she neighed. Much to someone's dismay; specifically a bard who happened to saw the whole interaction, left a mutter to himself.
"Why does the midget get to touch Roach in haste and I don't?!" Jaskier muttered rather in disbelief. The Witcher fixing his black, hooded wool cape attached to his shoulders, giving him a subtle hum with the gravel of his voice.
Jaskier huffed for the third time, hands on his hips as he watched the scene before him with incredulity in his baby blue peepers. You happily caressed her crest as Geralt fixed things on the leather bag attached to the horse's hip.
"Geralt---" Jaskier started but was cut off with a insouciant scold from the man himself, "Don't call her midget," he cut him off without even paying him attention. Jaskier gave a nod; a grin molding his face leading to mischief at the chide given.
Jaskier took a step close and planned to give Roach's crest a caress but his stern friend was fast enough to cease his wishes, "Still, don't touch roach," Geralt quickly mumbled as he felt Jaskier's plan on touching his horse. The bard slyly grabbed onto his own hair, brushing them through his locks like he wasn't about to pet Roach. Geralt closed the bag with a soft click, giving him the side-eye; voice firm and full of derision, "I don't want you singing a song about my horse in the near future,"
Which is why you were walking on your own now with Geralt's good will on making you handle the death march rather like a happy child.
It was probably okay, you thought at the back of your mind. Walking, that is. Exercising in the morning was great, except that if it weren't too chilly unlike him who have gotten a full armor and gear out of his closet like he'd gone out of a magazine or animè. The sword on his back even giving you shivers, but a different kind because of how tough looking he had as his exterior.
You shook your head as he just looked back at you. That look of his that was filled of inquiry; asking you what you were saying in the back of your mind. A huff of pure exhaustion was given to The Witcher before you sauntered forward, leaving the man eyeing you with sass and a high raise of his bushy brow.
Geralt followed through along with Roach as he pulled her reins, slowly galloping as he analyzed your form from behind. His buttoned up tunic that reached the ends of your thighs with a weird kind of foot ware that certainly doesn't help with the crispy, brisk temperature of the forest.
Geralt gravelly sighed, watching you struggle with scrubbing your legs together as you pathetically strolled forward and onto the place that he'd pointed. He was too engrossed at seeing you struggle when he has heard a slight twig breaking from afar, catching his senses and making him look to where it came from.
"Midget," The Witcher tried calling you with that deep voice of his in the middle of the woods. Though, to no avail; you never heard him coherently and continued your stroll through the forest; hollering a message without even looking back because of the mere exhaustion.
"You're too slow, Geralt, like an old man! I'm exhausted!"
He breathed out his vexation of your naivety that you weren't strolling in your world. You were walking in theirs and having your own little dimension while you walk by yourself can be pretty dangerous.
Geralt heard the crack of another wood. It was from behind a large hickory tree. He doubtfully grabbed onto the handle of his sword wrapped behind him; halfway unsheathing the sword and contemplating if he needed to jump off his horse when suddenly a medium sized Hirikka came into his view, maybe an inch shorter than you. Those eyes that were doe, just like yours whenever you wanted something and eventually getting it from him.
"You're hungry, aren't you?" Geralt asked the Hirrika. The tone in his voice softer and in awe. He'd rummaged through his bag without taking his Aurum, blazing eyes away from the harmless creature, feeling an apple inside his bag and threw it as the Hirikka caught it with its own two paws.
"Don't get yourself killed out there,"
Thus, he began to follow you as fast as possible before you even get yourself harmed from any monsters. When he'd seen you leaning on the fences of Cuthberth's home, he didn't know he has been holding a breath for as long as he could remember without seeing the sight of you.
You were making him insane for not even waiting for him and thinking what would've attacked you in the forest of Kaedwan.
Cuthbert was feeding the chickens inside their palisades. His friend thought you were lost but you've said that you came for the purpose of buying chickens with a man. He was friendly enough to give you chitter-chatter while waiting for Geralt to follow you from behind. It took minutes before he arrived with a complete set of body parts; so the worry of him being killed off by a monster was thrown in the dumps.
As he rode his horse closer, you've had the chance to admire the beauty edging to be seen. You were in awe as his mere self was enough to get you ogling at the man treading near. Never seeing such a man like that who wore armors in his everyday life except from seeing Cosplayers in certain conventions that seemed so fake rather than Geralt who felt real. Too real that you were pondering if he was just a mere hallucination or a fantasy of yours.
He was definitely eye-candy. Dashing. Ravishing. Beyond gorgeous.
Cuthbert saw them coming and so, his expression turned wild with a grin. His dirty fingers scratching his bald head in excitement as he jogged out of the fences with a giddy self. "Oi! You didn't tell me it's the infamous Geralt of Rivia, elfin!"
Famous. He's famous? you thought to yourself before keeping your eyes away from the witcher who had already jumped down his horse and gave you a look; asking what was wrong because you were staring like there was a problem at hand.
You didn't need to tell him that your heart was actually the problem. It was always skipping a beat whenever he'd pay a glimpse to stare at your eyes.
A soft clear of your throat, your fist covering your mouth as you do and you eyed Cuthbert inquisitively, "Is he famous? Famous for what? Is he an actor? Model? The king of this kingdom or something?"
Cuthbert patted his dirty hands on his soiled apron full of flour, a hand on his hip while the other reaches out for Geralt's powerful looking shoulder in attempt to give him a pat. The animal butcher's forest green eyes coruscant of fervor. Geralt's initial response was to give him a smile back with the man's excitement in seeing him again, "This lad's a something! Kills all types of beasts, vampires, dragons, huge kikimores---"
You coughed out loud, making them snap their heads from where you stood. Cuthbert's words sounded too surprising to be true. As much as you remembered, vampires only existed in the movies and games; not in the real life survival of people. His words caught you off-guard, "Vamp--vampires? There's vampires here, Cuthbert? Even dragons?"
Geralt looked at you, utmost jaded. The way your voice stuttered alerted him that you were scared or probably still unfamiliar--still illiterate of their world since he was doubting to give you all the information ahead if you abruptly disappear out-of-nowhere with the knowledge of the continent; their world. It would be very much dangerous for it to be compromised especially that you had the experience in teleporting to their dimension.
Cuthbert gave a loud laugh, not believing the strangeness of your words, "You're actin' like yer’ never been here before! I thought yer’ were livin' with the Witcher?! You should ask the white wolf, here! He's killed hundreds! Maybe even thousands!"
You've fluttered your eyes closed, trying to calm yourself from running off the forest and getting yourself killed just like the horror movies you've watched. You've called them idiots, now wasn't the time to call yourself one as well.
Though, you were completely unaware of Geralt's gaze which consist an ample amount of worry. You continued your rambles in a hushed whisper, "I'm not just in a freakin' game that have monsters, but even a live-action movie of Twilight. This is great, real great."
The Witcher clenched his teeth, gradually turning his body to you without moving his soles. His forehead creasing as he could feel your heart beat quickening, "Are there also wolves? Big bad wolves here?" your voiced lowering a miniscule, sounding diminutive.
His friend gave off a shrug, his mouth forming a thin line when he did so as he scratched his whitened beard, "We may never know what this world can bring, Elfin! It always brings out the worst of everythin'!"
At the confident mention of that, you've felt your chest tightening with the knowledge of having vampires and dragons around. What if you died in their world? Would you also be dead in earth? Geralt licked his Crimson lips, staring down at you with utmost comfort that he could give. Yet, he failed at that with how stoic his expressions can get. Though, his eyes were exempted because his feelings can be read through those stern, Aurum eyes.
Midway, he'd lift his burly armor-coated arms to plan and give your back a caress to calm you down; but he was immediate enough to drop it down considering that maybe even a touch to the hand would calm you because he'd seen it trembled. If only he was thoroughly direct towards you; he would in a heart beat.
"Don't panic, Midget." The roughness of his voice; that definite amount of timbre. It was the only word you've heard from him. Short but straightforward. Even so, still the only thing that calmed you down through out all your panic attacks back in earth and even in their world.
Cuthbert has seen Geralt's attempt of comfort; even seeing his eyes shift in a way that nobody else could. He had a smirk on his face, scrubbing that beard he was owning, "Who is she, Witcha'? Another one of those clingy harlots of yours?"
Geralt turned his head to see Cuthbert smirking. The way his eyes changed into a lethargic faze meant that the witcher was mantling the emotions he was having or probably having no idea that he was feeling it yet; in denial of the state he was in.
"---Or the trouble and strife?"
The witcher knew what he meant and decided to let those words fall out of his ear to the other. His hands clasping together on his front as he straightened his back, cocking his head to the side as he narrowed his eyes on the latter, "We need...chickens," Cuthbert raised his eyebrows in astonishment, "You cook now, witcher?"
No words were said besides from a satisfied hum as the chickens clucked before the butcher of animals. The panic died down because of Geralt's voice and you've finally had the will to insert yourself in the conversation.
"I do!" you excitedly exclaimed, stepping a foot closer to Geralt and the witcher was aware of it, giving you the side-eye, "---also, do you have any spices please?"
Cuthbert nodded in comprehension, sending a playful wink to The Witcher and scrubbing his hands together as he also gave you a rogouish smile, "Oh, that kind. The little woman, Geralt! Literally because this elfin is quite short but fetching nevertheless!" Geralt gave him an apathetic blink of an eye, sighing from the talkativeness of the man.
But, also worth it if he could see those anticipated beams of yours as you stood beside him.
The latter gave out a loud sigh, seeming to be in his head space as he talked his thoughts out loud, "---I remember how Gisela cooks Flamiche for me whenever I go home from me' hunt! Though, that woman seldom does it anymore considering how Bridgely gets her attention a lots!"
Geralt gave him that daunting smile of his; wanting to tell the man to just butcher the heck out of the chickens already as he wanted to get it over with. You gave Cuthbert a wide smile, oblivious of Geralt's taunting gaze back at the man. He suppressed a laugh and nodded to himself; quickly running off to Geralt's wishes.
As the chicken was being slaughtered across the fence, Geralt was thoroughly unaware that you were already sniffing and crying because it was all out in the open and you could see how it was being killed. He watched you look over the fence and inspect Cuthbert cutting its head off and it made you shriek, warm tears falling on the sides of your face while watching how much pity you've given to the chicken.
Geralt did a double-take, eyeing you and where you were staring at and saw how you were crying over a chicken being slaughtered. He wanted to laugh because of how you were being sad over it. However, he decided against so as to not offend you when you were just pouring your heart out in this one.
"I thought...you wanted chickens?" the witcher pondered, leaning away from the fence and facing you instead with that amused glint in his eyes.
You've sniffed hard, patting your nose with his clothes that you were wearing from; the snot wanting to come out of its cave. You gazed up at him; eyes damp and reddish from the cries. "I did, Geralt! But not for it to be killed like this!" you hiccuped from all the bawling that has happened, "---It was better to be bought in a supermarket!"
The way you cry always made a pinch inside Geralt's heart. A kind where he would try and do everything to make it stop because you were annoying but also irresistible.
His lips lifted in a slight beam, looking around the forest before peering down at your sobbing thyself. "There, there," surprisingly, Geralt cooed before you; stopping your weeps short as you gaped at the tall witcher. His chiseled face warped in clear softness and mirth, "---for a bountiful feast requires death in exchange for us to be sated,"
The amazing color of his eyes gleamed more under the sun. You couldn't help but outstare back at him with that stupefied look of utter adoration. You snapped out of your daydream when he was waiting for a witty retort but you've loudly cleared your throat; the heat travelling to your neck. Before it can even reach your face, you turned your head back to look at Cuthbert who was now grinning back at you; holding the headless chicken up for you to see. Its blood dripping down the ground as he mouthed a 'what do you think?' back at you and Geralt to tell you if the size of the chicken was a-okay.
Your face quickly morphed into a wince, another mourn about to come to light when you've felt a warm hand on your shoulder; shooting lightning to your spine as you jumped from the physical touch. Geralt gently turned your body around; away from the panorama of chicken slaughter. The way his lips lifting in a small, soft smile never leaving yet. "Don't look at it,"
A huff was sent to the latter, "I can't! It's making noise!"
"Then cover your ears," Geralt's brow raised in sarcasm. Though, those playful sparkle never dying down. You narrowed your eyes back at him, an annoyed crease of your forehead as you explained and raised your hands back at him. It looked dull and definitely freezing, "But, my hands are shaking from the cold!"
Geralt studied you from head to foot, noting the lack of clothes you were wearing. The smile you've grown to love fell as he sighed, looking away for a moment before a tiresome gaze of his eyes was sent to you. He held onto the string of his jet black hooded cape, unlatching it around his neck as you stared up at him in utmost curiosity.
The softness of his cape fell around your shoulders like a furnace hugging your body; better yet the soul that needed a hug after all you've experienced since the first time you've been in their world. You could feel your heart warming at the gesture of Geralt giving you his dramatic cape; even growing hotter when he was tethering the tie together; intently staring down at your face and feeling his thick, calloused fingers inches before your neck.
Maybe, an egg was worthy of using your face as a frying pan right now.
You consciously looked away from the heat of his stare. Geralt tightened the tie around your neck as you've felt the heaviness of his cape over your shoulders. He drew he fingers away from your neck, slanting his head as he never cut the gaze he had; rather than you who'd looked away because you were...blushing.
"Better?" His voice graveled, a small beam carving his face. You've reluctantly gawked back at him, giving him a reserved nod. The way you were acting looked entirely stupid, your eyes looking like those googly ones used as stickers back in your desk as you tried avoiding the intensity of his stare. You bit the insides of your cheeks, deciding to leave the exhilaration out in the back as you had the courage to look at him, "Better!---Never better, Ge-Geralt!" Regardless of the brave act, you embarrassingly stammered and cited his name wrongly with a shameful 'J', "I mean, Geralt. Geralt with a G!" you back paddled in an instant, scratching your temples as you avoided his eyes and tried to fan your face.
The witcher looked askance, he could hear your heart beat running miles after miles. Geralt pondered why and what was making it pump fast when you weren't even having your panic attacks.
He crossed his hefty arms, looking at you skeptically but with a stupefying smile on his face, "Are you going to stop being a bairn now?"
You initially stopped fanning your face, narrowing your eyes back at him; completely confused, "What's a bairn?" he sighed and glanced at the sky, shaking his head with a beam that fell as quick as you've seen it when Geralt heard Cuthbert walking to where you were and glanced at the acquaintance.
The dead chicken was tied close to the witcher's bag located on the hip of his horse. You were busy staring at the four pieces of aftershafted chickens dangling on Roach's side with that sympathetic glaze of your eyes but actually talking at the back of your mind that its death would be worth it because you cook well and he'll taste good.
Cuthbert scrutinized your nodding form. A strange expression written on his face that tells that he was seeing the oddity that you were nodding at the chickens like you were talking to them.
The animal butcher was running his blabber mouth about how his chickens were also missing every other day. Sometimes his pigs or goats that made Geralt narrow his eyes from his share of message; his nose slightly scrunching from the admission of Cuthbert with his missing animals.
He didn't need to know that some were kind of caught by Geralt's hands. Maybe at least ten chickens, three pigs and two goats. Even so, slaughtered by the witcher himself.
The sneaky witcher couldn't catch a chicken as of the moment because he always does it at night. Catching a chicken from other people's fence in the morning can be risky and definitely tricky.
"About...the sorceress," Geralt trailed off, grabbing Cuthbert's attention away from you before he could even think you didn't belong to their world and guessed about his stealing escapades. He spun his head to look at Geralt, thoroughly distracted from how he called him out, "---you still hangin' onto that sorceress you had, witcher?"
"No...It's....kind of complicated," the latter speculated with a shake of his head.
Cuthbert nodded in understanding, scratching the nape of his neck as he seem to ponder, "The tittle-tattles around the village says that the sorceress is in a burgh called 'crow's perch' in the east of Vizima," pause. "It's a long journey out there! Lots'a beasts to encounter before it!" he roughly warned.
The Witcher only hummed in response; deep in thought as he calculated how long will it take to get there after a week when he was done with any favors for the villagers of Kaedwan and for some of his options on how to get you home.
His first choice was the Djinn. Now, he just needed to find one. Again. But, not for the sole purpose of asking peace and a long nap but to help you.
Geralt fished out the black pouch he kept on his sides, reaching out to give it to Cuthbert across the fence. The animal butcher shook his head to decline the money, "No, I don't need yer' coins." he simply admitted with a scoff, "You've helped us a lot; for me to be accepting some kind of repayment from the white wolf himself---,"
"----You deserve a thank you for all your help, Witcher." Cuthbert continued with a grateful tone.
Thus, this was the first time that he'd been acknowledged by his help in slaying monsters and terrifying creatures. The man himself didn't know how pleasing it was to hear those words from a mere human and from a person he'd help back in the years. Even so, seeing those smiles you've given him when you were excited to cook the damn chicken didn't seem so satisfying and delightful to look at; until now..
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MORE FLUFF ON CHAPTER 4.1! Heehee! THANK YOU FOR THE LOVE, TATER TOTS! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO LOVES GERALT CALLING Y/N, MIDGET? 
Taglist: @alyxkbrl​ @himarisolace​ @barkingbullfrog​ @ayamenimthiriel​ @hellodevilslittlesister @vania-marie @spookypeachx @grungelovebug​ @fangirl-inthe-us @nympeth @missjenniferb (I couldn’t tag you AGAIN bud! A different blog was popping out of the recommendation and it wasn’t your blog. Though, I’ll try again on the next update! Don’t worry! Tumblr is being DUMBLR RN. I’M MAD) @amirahiddleston @gabethelobster @dreaming-about-starfleet @uncoolcloudyhead @melaninstylezz @psychosupernatural
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genesisrose74 · 4 years ago
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whats this stuff abt dream cheating on his speedrun im so confused
Aight so here’s a basic rundown:
So Dream has had some issues with the speedrun board of mods and stuff who validate runs before, even to the point where he decided to stop streaming speedruns on his Twitch because people throwing shade onto his runs was becoming frustrating.
Apparently today one of the main mods for that board uploaded an analysis of one of his submitted runs done before he stopped speedrunning live. It would have been a 16th place run at the time on the official board of it got approved, so not an overly huge placement.
Apparently the dude was working on this analysis for like two months. It provided some stats that he believed were indicative of some sort of mod that allowed Dream to cheat with certain mob drops, like blaze rods and ender pearl trades. He stated that it was incredibly unlikely these statistics aligned with even the 99th percentile possibility of things and compared some other runners’ probabilities to his own.
Dream made a tweet about it, clearly upset with the way that his 16th place run was being invalidated after two months of it going under suspicion. There’s been an ongoing trend where Dream’s name gets used in a lot of videos for clicks, so he felt as if that was a similar situation here. Mr. Beast, Karl, I believe TapL, and some others commented saying that the situation was definitely fishy and not fair to the work Dream puts in to complete his runs. Enter conflicting arguments in the below comments. You know how it is
Personally I don’t want to make any sort of accusation on either side, although I do agree with Dream here that the timing and everything of the analysis publication is a little...odd. Right before MCC and the Streamys, where Dream’s name would be circling already?? Holding onto the analysis and then posting - I believe without the input of the rest of the speedrunning board people - right now is a bit convenient, but idk. And for a 16th place run? Why would he go through the trouble of trying to find ways around the system if it’s not even a top 10 placement lol? He’s a member of the analysis team tho, so I mean it’s his job to look over stuff which I understand. It was just weird timing.
Should Dream have brought up the specific channel name of the guy who did the vid analysis in his tweet?? Mm, probably not. But then again, he’s had similar situations where people have outright accused him even when he’s been trying different seeds for hours on stream, so I can understand the frustration and I don’t think he meant to send like a hoarde of people over there to just ridicule the analysis.
Don’t worry too much about it tho cause to me it seems pretty minimal of a situation!! Dream still has an official 5th place run spot as well, and it looks as if there’s gonna be a discussion about it (apparently some of the other board mods are kinda thinking about leaving or smth) and a formal response from the blobby man himself, so honestly I think it’ll turn out fine. With all the times I’ve watched Dream’s speedrun streams and stuff, I really do trust that he’s being truthful here, yet then again the analysis creator has a right to counter as it’s kinda his job.
Ta-daa, that was a lot to type lmao — hope this helps with context!!
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gwtwoimpsarewe · 5 years ago
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Welcome to the Family
So, this story won’t make a lot of sense without context; but I’ll save that for another post. I wrote it to enjoy it and it’s my first full OC full prose. Hopefully ya’ll enjoy it too.
A quick helper tho set after the prologue bound by blood. So mild? Spoilers? 
Lorcan Vulthon - Norn, Roughly about 26 (circa 1332),(Ex-)Wolf Shaman,  (Ex-)Auxiliary Iron Legion Engineer, Vigil Initiate. Yes he was raised by wolves. (Not literally) 
Zariah Dào - Human, Roughly about 42 (circa 1332), (My Commander for the game, but operates under Lt. Commander to allow for easier rp), Warmaster of a Vigil Company, Lorcan’s new Boss, Has not tapped out since Claw Island. 
Veeck - my necromancer reaper I haven’t made but am taking from an old DnD character of mine, Asura, age unknown, The Deacon of Pain,  
A jungle stalker, tiger and one other feline mini follow him around that’s the joke. One of the JP’s for the Tiger den Achievement is what sparked this. 
Not sure what to tag it but it starts funny ends feelsy, found family vibes, if descriptions of eyes squick you (no harm just who’s looking at you, sudden eye contact etc) be wary or pass on, fluffy angst I suppose, emotional breakdown,
it ends happily I swear! 
(Don’t panic if things seem to change, I post and edit as I go otherwise I get locked in perfectionism spiral and never post at all.) 
-
“Boss.” 
Eyes shielded from the setting sun, Lorcan peered out over the landscape, comm at the ready. 
“Boooossssss.” 
Dusk crawled toward the horizon. Hazy smoke trails blown over the open fields lazily from the nearby mill, an end of a lovely day, on all accounts. 
“Boss!” 
The receiver came to life in Lorcan’s hand with an exhausted sigh of static as Lt. Commander Zariah sluggishly answered, “Yes, Lorcan. What is it?” 
The smile pulled over Lorcan’s face, unable to resist the urge to tease. “Kinda, an odd time of day to be sleeping sir.” 
It was utterly incredible how he could feel the dry stare-down and complex half lecture on the misuse of communications equipment in a brief pause. 
That was talent right there.  
Another sigh brought his attention back in, “I wasn’t, thank you, did you need something?” 
Brightening, Lorcan sat down in front of the mess of fur and leaves, “Yeah! I found your cat bed!” 
“… What.”  
Lorcan gestures at the pile of leaves at his feet although his officer couldn’t see it. “Yeah! One of your Sylvari, the one with the monotone-” 
“-Ours, and their name is Eir, -” 
“-Said one of your weird tiny death machines-“ 
“-Again, wild animals, and not mine-” 
“-Yeah, yeah, the striped one ran off and went to bed everything-” 
“-Tiger; and has been making beds not bedding, your Common is improving-” 
“I found one!” 
The crackle and whine from a heavy static sigh made Lorcan wince and pull the device from his ear. 
“...… You’ve found a tiger.” 
Something about the suddenly calculating monotone made his insides squirm as he forced the cheerful up another notch. “Well no, but I’ve found its bed, and now we have each other’s scents, and I probably will find it and we’ll form a life-long bond like rangers and shaman-” 
“Lorcan.” His name came gently, cutting off his rambling in a way that had nausea setting in. 
“I’m grateful you found one, does it look fresh?” The genial tone was almost disconcerting after seeing nothing but jaded exhaustion, and it was wrong. 
This was not how this works. 
This was a crank call. Because he’s Lorcan. The rambling loud, obnoxious idiot whose superiors while agitated are fond of. Lorcan, who did not want to do this all over again but here they are, and Zariah! Who’d barely known him three days! 
Who took him in without blinking after getting cut off from his war-band, who trusted him enough for a reconnaissance mission. Who put up with all his antics so far with a droll but benign stare; who—
A rustling came finally, along with the clink and slosh of what Lorcan knew to be the large mug of coffee usually in hand. 
“Lorcan-” 
“Stop that,” his throat felt tight, half leaping to his feet into a defensive stance, “You—Don’t-” The plains suddenly felt suffocatingly small, leaving him on edge and snarling into his comm. 
Burn him, what was he doing. 
“Lorcan.” 
“Stop that!” his ears were burning, eyes stinging against the smoke in the air. It was his name; it was just his name what the tar was his problem? 
The placid silence that followed nearly had him throw the damn thing down onto the rocks. Embarrassment burned viciously under his skin. He was better than this now. He wasn’t- 
“Lo-” 
He turned the comm offline. 
-
It was long past dark by the time he’d calmed down, eyes red and throat raw, hunched at the base of the tree.
Great first impression.
Really sold it this time.
Groaning, he dug his face into his knees to do something other than mope in the dark like a moody cub. Or worse start up again.
A skittering of rocks and not entirely muffled metal had him look up in time to see a silhouette with an obnoxious Asuran light nearly blind him.
“Mind if I come over? You turned your comm off.” Zariah inquired tilting his head to the side just before the last jump. “I can stay over here. Just wanted to-”
Lorcan waved him off with a flippant hand and shoved his face back down. “Make sure I hadn’t broken-”  
“-Your bones. Yes. Or anything else important to your personal self.” Zariah moved over the outburst with both a note of finality and comfort that had Lorcan looking up out of instinct, only to wince again at the mini sun in his Commanders hand.
“… If you're going to jump over, douse the Mouse-Light. Before I lose my eyes.”
 Immediately, the object dimmed down and out before far more familiar sounds came and a torch sparked to life. “Sorry about that, but I’ll ask you to refrain from derogatory names. Veeck is a valued member of our team and cares deeply about our survival.”
“… The Asura.”
“Yes.”
“Who rambles on about some new Entity?”
“Of Pain, yes.”
“… Boss.”
“Not up for debate, Lorcan.”
Heaving to his feet with a sigh, Lorcan reached out to him; “Well, can’t let them upstage me now can I. C’mon I’ll catch you; it won’t give you enough light without the M--……. beacon. From the Deacon.”
Zariah landed with a grunt into his grip. “You’ll have to share that one, they’d love that-what is that an idiom?”
“Not a clue.” Wearily sitting again, Lorcan stopped short as something small and purring wormed its way into his lap. “… Uh…”
“She likes belly rubs, and she can smell tears.” Was all Zariah offered settling next to him and safely anchoring the torch in front of them, while the Stalker wiggled about before she settled solidly into Lorcan’s lap. Big eyes batted up at him, as if pointedly proving Zariah’s point; said belly up and offered.
Slowly, Lorcan answered the demand, a new deeper slew of purrs unleashed in repayment. “I thought you said they’re wild.”
“They are. Or were, a few years ago. They found me in the Maguuma, when Mordremoth was; well you know.” came the easy answer, as Zariah set about digging in his pack and handing over a wrapped meat smelling something to Lorcan who merely blinked at it.
“You haven’t eaten since before you left and I know how Norn eat. Eat your dinner.”
Gingerly, Lorcan accepted the meal; before peering at him. “… Does this get any weirder?”
“Only if you let your guard down long enough for them to steal it.”
“Wh-Hey!”
 -
They sat like that a long while, quietly; with a lap full of warm purring death machines, a belly full with warm food and drink, and tired eyes watching the torch slowly burn down to a smolder.
The lecture never came; the ‘we’re alike you and I’ speech, the wise mentor talk, whatever he’d been expecting. Zariah just sat there, relaxed and was… well, there.
But then it made sense didn’t it. He was a tactician for a military organization, one of the high tier leaders in the Pact, leader of his own company; and Lorcan was an accomplished engineer and a perceptive people's person when he wasn’t being difficult. 
There wasn’t anything to say.
He’d freaked out, he didn’t want to freak out, but he did. He’d reverted to causing a scene and trouble because he was a full inferno of freaking the blazes out. About what any of this meant now. About where home was now. What he would do now. What his purpose was now.
Had another identity crisis in an evening flat because he kept trying to put it in a title. Wolf Shaman, Auxiliary Charr—anything that wasn’t just him. How else could he go back and show that he’d changed after all? Prove he was all grown up out of his awkward paws making a mess of everything.
Except he hadn’t had he-
“pWaCKth!”
Lorcan spat fur out of his mouth, leaning away from the incessantly batting paws from his lap companion.  “Hey! Hey! Hey! C’mon!”
“I told you. She smells monologues.”
“You said tears.”
Stretching out with an innocent hum that edged too close to playful to pass as sincere, Zariah rose a brow at him, “Mm? Did I? I must have misspoken. So terribly sorry.”
The words pulled a snort out of Lorcan at the obvious lie, “So, what, she just slaps you in the face at random? Or she’s just psychic and knows when you're spiraling every time.”
Turning towards him, Zariah rose the brow higher, something of a smirk toying in the corner of his mouth. “Oh, definitely a psychic; when I need it. Constantly. She can tell usually because,” His eyes glanced meaningfully at Lorcan’s lap, “I’ve ceased to pet her.”
Lorcan paused, looking to where his hands had fallen stagnant some time ago on her back, much to the indignant pout on her face. “… Oh.”
“Well.” He chuckled at his own obliviousness and began smoothing hands down her head and spine apologetically, much to her delight, “S’a good trick.”
“She tries.” A yawn dragged out the end of the sentence as Zariah settled down more against Lorcan’s side who moved to accommodate him.
Eyes glanced at the time curiously, “Aw burn me, Boss I’m-”
“Safe.” That firm tone was back again, even as exhausted as it sounded. “And that’s all I care about. We’ll go back when you’re ready.”
“Don’t you have paperwork to do?”
“Great thing about paper, it’ll be there when I get back.”
“What about orders? Don’t you have to know what’s”
“Anything I need to know, I’ll know through my comm, if it’s of immediate importance. As for orders, there are other commanders.”
“… How many hours you running on here?”
“Two and a half, I was in fact sleeping when you called me.”
“Boss-” An incredulous laugh cut short by an overused stubborn excuse.
“I had coffee.”
-
Silence lapsed again, softer as the torch barely glowed embers and Zariah’s breathing began to deepened, and slow against his side.
It wouldn’t have made sense for how lax Zariah was, after seven years of nearly non-stop war and fighting; if the moon wasn’t glinting off four Iron Legion Sharpshooters standing guard nearby that Lorcan could now see.
“Boss?” swallowing around the lump in his throat, Lorcan nudged him again. “Hey, Boss.”
There was a slurred hum, eyes not even opening as Zariah lifted a brow in answer “Mmn—yes Lorcan.”
“… Thanks.”
“S’ what ‘m here for.”
-
Epilogue (aka beeps an giggles)
For the weight of a Pact Commander, Zariah was unnervingly light once you removed the pack, armor, weapons, felines, etc.
Which Lorcan awkwardly got to know firsthand as the pint-sized (seriously how small was this guy) Asura fussed around this way and that muttering too fast to keep up with.
It was a very odd feeling of you break it you buy it, with the Commanders sleep schedule. Which cemented in his mind as no one else seemed bothered by the ranting Asura at his feet. 
“-two months! Two months! Not even! We were so close, on ordered leave, relaxing, vacationing, nearly had it! But no! The evil little box of death opens its evil little mouth and ruin everything! This does not please the Pain!”
Lorcan made the mistake of uttering “Does anything,” before realizing the error as he became the subject of the bespectacled, laser sharp, owlish gaze before off again as they moved in thought. 
Finally, with a decisive nod, they firmly shouted up to him, “…… Milk! Milk and Ink!”
(Seriously did the guy think he was deaf? Though they looked like they’d fit into his boot with room to spare, and he wasn’t exactly short himself.)
A tiny hand lifted into the air, fire in their eyes; “I shall explain!”
“Please don’t.” Lorcan begged.
“Easy Squeak-A-Veak, lets save converting until after we get Boss back to bed for a few hours. We’ve already got orders to meet up with General Soulkeeper in the morning.” Came the beautiful rescue from one of the other officers Lorcan couldn’t put a name to.
Whose hands lifted up immediately in a placating gesture, as the tiny Asura looked ready to implode, “Rephrase, to head over to General Soulkeeper in the morning.”
Small detonation avoided, the medic, nodded with minimal professional sulking, “He’s napping on the way there.”
“As always, you can try small fry, you can try. Eir wanted to see you; I’ll see that Boss gets settled yeah?” Offering a fond amused look, they winked at Lorcan who wasn’t honestly sure what to do with himself at this point of being ‘Boss-shelf’.
Veeck squinted but turned and left with a toddle out of the room. “I know what you’re doing and I don’t appreciate it but yes I will leave and stop scaring our recruit.”
“… Wasn’t scared.” Came late and lamely as the officer chuckled and lead him in to where Zariah was staying for the time being.
Which for the first few moments Lorcan was sure they got the wrong room before he finally spotted a bed past all the paperwork. “Is that a war table?”
“Mini-sized yeah, Rye sleeps in his office, it was the only solution after a long drawn out internal war lemme tell you.”
“How is that a win?”
“He used to do it on a cot armed with a coffee pot, and don’t worry about Veeck. Squeakers is harmless; they get dramatic with displeasure and pain cos it’s like a prayer offering? I think? I’m trying to follow it but I need a few more run throughs. They’re a lot calmer day to day.”
“…….. Oh! Good to know, thanks—ah…”
“You forgot my name already didn’t you.”
“……………………..”
Laughing they helped settle Zariah down and into bed, even tucking them in. Which by this point, Lorcan had one final question.
“…… Sooo, kinda curious. Why he’s not; you know.”
“Twitchy as fleas about being handled like a doll? He usually is, but this is day four of small naps and I made his coffee decaf. He’s out cold for the next three to five hours.”
“Burn me.”
“It’s a good thing, say goodnight if you want; just hit the lights when you're done. I’m catching a few myself before we hit the road.” They offered with a wave before heading out.
Lorcan absentmindedly gave a wave only to perk and try to call out; “Wait! You didn’t--…… tell me your name. Tar’nfeathers.”
Sitting down with a sigh he glanced over at Zariah, and with a crooked grin leaned over. “Night Boss. Still totally going to steal your tiger.”
A brow raised as tired, but amused eyes snapped open, “Still totally not going to let it happen.” Zariah challenged as Lorcan shrieked with a flail and fell off the bed. 
“Burn! Tar! and Feather You!”
Yawning with a final chuckle, Zariah listened to him stalk off and turn out the lights. “Good Night, Lorcan.” 
“Welcome to the family.” 
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the-quitter · 6 years ago
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I’m going to go out of order for a bit because the last character is... oh man, Like, my first oc I think?
This one however is a nice one. I like this one. She’s supposed to have the signature duckbutt hairstyle, and she constantly colors it. She’s featured most prominently sporting the fire-blazing look. A part-time model, not too popular, but well liked by people. She used to have a super dramatic, backstory, I’m talking, murder, sister-killing, really heavy guilting stuff. But she would definitely not turnout as happy as she is today!
I prefer her Model name (Ellena York) to her actual name (Akanotame Hyo).
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Link for the two above --> ads tho
Now her backstory might be undefined, but she has a very interesting present!
The story goes that she and one of the Love Interests (more on him later), went to the beach and found another Love Interest who’s... well, not human at all. Surprisingly in universe, absolutely no one is shocked or surprised about the creature except human Love Interest. Even Ellena doesn’t seem to care. I mean, she is curious about him, and teaches him the human language and reading and what-not. Like she knows he’s different, but sort of treats him like... well, it’s weird. Like you know this thing is an alien, and you do have so many questions, but. None of the questions are pressing ones, they’re just. There.
York houses him in her home, and even her parents don’t blink at it. It’s as if he’s a normal house guest that they know very well.
Her entire story is supposed to be light and whimsical and comedic. With I guess shocking moments of truth, when the non-human Love Interest displays too much aggression and/or animalistic traits.
Non-Human Love Interest is named Kida Tora by Ellena. Not sure if she ever taught him about his own name, usually she just grabs him if she wants his attention. His gender is also imposed onto him by York. But I never thought of him as a full complete male. Perhaps it has a unique gender that isn’t found in the human species? In any case. Here’s some pics.
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Missing Link - I tried my best, I just couldn’t seem to find it...
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Also also, just want to point out the purple lamb there is just Ellena’s favorite plushie. That is her guitar, and yes she does play. Kida does not. In reality I don’t think she’d let him hold the guitar since even his ‘human’ appearance has nails that are too long and sharp (they’re bone instead of skin). However, I can’t see her denying him things or being strict. Chances are she carefully guided him on how to hold and strum, after he sees her play and asks to try it (at this point in time, he probably didn’t know how to speak properly, and just held out his hands in the most child-like grabby motion).
I do not play the guitar. I cannot tell you anything more other than the fact that Ellena is quite good at it. Doesn’t really have an interest in making her own songs, but she does enjoy switching lyrics in other songs to fit her mood. She mostly plays mainstream music, and in very rare cases, she’s played songs for her family and friends. Definitely plays it in her free time when she feels like it, and is more comfortable performing for herself. She does occasionally play in school if it’s required of her to do so. Or if enough people request it.
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Now this character isn’t actually fleshed out fully. My theory is that he was originally human, when something or someone turned him into a non-human creature. (How he went from white to brown we will never know.)
I did have more theories, but as I typed out the previous words, I thought it made more sense for him to originally be human. It would explain why he can take a human-ish appearance when he needs to. Maybe even say that he became brown from years spent at sea (as both sea creature and human).
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another cute one. Aw. My theory is Ellena has a sea of plushies in her room.
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in picture titles I usually write notes. It says here that the hair on Kida is 100% accurate. Huh. I look at it now though, and I don’t like it, simply because it’s covering his eye, and that’s not want I want him to look like now. Perhaps I drew him differently on paper. We’ll find out when I sort through all my art. After sorting through all the dress-up games!
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again, the title implies this is accurate. But I’m thinking I want this design changed big time. Though I suppose the necklace can stay.
And now, On to our other human friend. One of the few male characters that I’ve made, that feels realistic (to me at least).
His name is Wilton West. He’s the obligatory transfer student (again, all made in my anime phase). The whole story takes place in japan I suppose, but I’m changing that right now. Because. It just. In seems like it would fit better in my vampire universe, somewhere far in the future. Perhaps mana will be overshadowed by technology. Avatar style (I’m still not watching Legend of Korra tho, I’m sorry).
He’s a skeptic, a pessimist and maybe sometimes a realist when he’s right. He’s also a gamer. Not a hardcore one, he just likes passing his time with games. I’ve written somewhere that he may or may not have a motorcycle. But chances are it’s his grandfather’s, and he’s definitely not allowed to touch it.
Wilton is also the first character I’ve created that requires glasses. Which is weird. I mean glasses is like, a normal thing. Why is he the first character to need them.
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Now while Wilton and Ellena do spend time together, they have more of a frenemy relationship. Wilton spends too much time finding faults in what Ellena says and does. Like having a constant critic, who will never sing your praises and always look for more of your flaws.
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this is a myth, Wilton rarely smiles.
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listen bro, he’s only smirking cause he’s about to get that Fortnite win.
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The title says, ‘this is how they met’. To be honest, it probably is! Ellena loves swimming, and it seems while on her way to the swim meet after school, she bumped into West and scattered his almost late essay to the wind!
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‘his style’
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dat witty banter(tm) tho!
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OH NO I can’t find the Link! Please help.
maybe he has a dog? But he seems more of a cat person. You know what. screw it. He has a cat. Sorry good doggo. But ya gotta go.
And this last one is a crossover with my other O.C. that I’ll be talking about soon in another post.
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trulyhumblenarcissist · 7 years ago
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Tokyo ghoul:re chapter 131, about Touka and Kaneki
Well… Jokes aside, this chapter was really depressing. I knew from the very start of my experience with Tg that kaneki was probably going to die, but having it pretty much confirmed is disheartening anyways. The general mood is incredibly gloomy, kaneki’s health is so deteriorated that he looks like a ghost (he probably is one, in a sense). I’d really like to spend a few words for Touka. The poor girl is getting so much hatred that’s unfair. First people called her abusive, then accused her of forcing kaneki to have sex because she wanted to trap him or something, last chapter she was a monster for keeping her pregnancy secret, now she’s literally the devil because she chose to put her child’s future before everyone (even Yoriko omg!!). I’m going to write my two cents about all this drama, because I’m bored and insomnia is a bitch. Touka is a woman, but let me put this straight, she’s still very young. She grew up in a world that hated her even before she was born. Touka had a loving family and her heart was filled with kindness and affection, she knew that specific type of warmth, she played with her brother and a little bird. In a blink of an eye she lost everything, even hope. Left behind, betrayed by all that kindness that was her father’s condemn. So Touka put herself together alone, struggling to survive, no one around to guide her, to support and promote her emotional growth. She cried silently, shamefully, hating her innate tenderness. She didn’t want to end up like Arata. Loneliness and rage, power and distance altogether, but… She met Yoriko and her eyes were gentle, too gentle to be ignored. She met kaneki and he was an idiot, a useless, indecisive weakling; his eyes were full of sorrow and Touka let them sink into her own pain. Touka fell in love with someone, a stranger to be honest, and love itself is a difficult matter. She was lookin for an image, a memory, fond and terrible at the same time. Fear of losing as a twisted form of complacency… She doesn’t know how to be completely sane, she’s still craving love without understanding its multiple faces. SHE WAS ALONE, missing that precious piece of herself, always longing, waiting… She doesn’t want to feel isolated anymore. Kaneki… He is not a perfect lover, he has troubles, he aches constantly, but he is… Somehow… Sweet. Touka doesn’t know him, not so much, not as good as she should. Their relationship is tainted by their own warped concept of love. But is this really so terrible? Is this really so incomprehensible for a girl desiring more closeness, more understanding, more REALITY? She wishes for kaneki to become a real person for once, to complete the puzzle of his shattered identity. Someone she can be with, someone she can care for without any fear. I know a lot of readers will not like this statement, but the harsh truth is that, for many people, sex represents a way of bonding. A direct, imperfect, exclusive one, of course. Emotions are not easily manageable, especially when you have spent most of your life fighting to be “just invisible”. Touka wanted her answers, wanted to put a name to her swirling feelings, so she made her move. Kaneki was more than willing to embrace their moment together. Kaneki… He’s a young man. He was hurt a lot by the people he loved the most. He was told to shut up, to be a maggot (small, insignificant), to not upset anyone with his existence. His mother gave him the message he was a nuisance for the world and unfortunately he belived her. Kaneki doesn’t really want to live, to get attached, to feel. He’s good with his books, foreign worlds, inoffensive artificial emotions. Touka is the first ghoul he met after Rize. She is a blazing flame, she lives her personal hell with proudness and a bit of recklessness. She is beautiful and she shakes him from the inside. He fell for her twice, even when he didn’t know who he really was. Kaneki needs to be shaken, he really does. Kaneki enjoyed having sex with her and at the end, he quietly slept on her knees, SMILING. No one of them really thought about the consequences, they just AGREED to freed themselves from every intrusive thought, chasing after that precious thing so mysterious and always far away. Kaneki and Touka are two young adults overwhelmed by a crazy world that has never really protected them (actually they are still learning how to protect themselves). However this crazy world is also unforgiving. They are BOTH responsible of their actions, they had sex TOGHETER and sure as hell none of them wished to become a parent, especially not Touka. Yes, she has been carless, but Kaneki too. How can anyone ignore the torment she’s living? She found herself pregnant and nothing can change the past. So now, even tho she didn’t planned anything, she’s enduring terrible physical pain, even not knowing if her efforts are somehow useful, because she cannot let the creature inside of her die. And at first her greatest concern was still to PROTECT kaneki, sparing him from the responsibility of being a father. Kaneki has already the entire world on his shoulders, so she didn’t want to make him even more anxious. She was ready to live this hell alone, for Kaneki’s sake. I usually don’t like when other people try to impose their decisions on others, but I was still impressed by Touka’s abnegation. I’m happy she chose to tell kaneki everything in this chapter. The baby is also kaneki’s and he has has the right AND the duty to take full responsibility. Now please spare me the comments about Touka mentioning another girl or the childish argument “THEY DON’T SEEM HAPPY! THEY ARE SO FAKE!!”. First of all, Touka is a sarcastic person. We know this from the very beginning of Tg. Touka uses irony every time she feels uncomfortable, embarrassed or scared. Even when she confessed a few chapters ago she tried to appear casual about the matter, even if her thoughts were complex and also tinged with sadness (remember her referring to kaneki’s suicidal tendencies?). Please don’t be ridiculous by giving meaning to Touka’s silly ice breakers. If you want to criticize use more convincing arguments. As for the “ they don’t seem happy! ” thing, well… OF COURSE they are not happy! Kaneki is literally dying, he doesn’t even know if he’ll be lucky enough to see this child’s face, the pregnancy itself has an high risk of failure, Touka and kaneki know this for a fact and it’s frightening. The world is burning, ghouls and humans are at each others’ throats more violently than ever and at the moment ghoulkind is definitely losing. They are starving and are forced to live underground. So… Tell me: what exactly should kaneki and Touka be celebrating? At least kaneki tried to connect more this time. Touka gave him a ring, now he tells her in his typically childish way that he truly cares for her and that he wants them to be together like a real family.
As for Yoriko, I’m sorry for her, but I can totally understand Touka’s decision. Touka wants to protect her family, her child and the father of her child. You can’t help anyone if you don’t choose. It is painful indeed, but there is no other way. I guess Kaneki was really impressed by Touka’s will. His mother didn’t fight for him, so his son is already luckier in my opinion.
Disclaimer: I want to make this crystal clear, I’m not a shipping fangirl, or at least, I don’t have any favourite pairing at all in Tokyo Ghoul. I think none of these freaks should be allowed to experience romance and reproduce (lol). Seriously tho, I really don’t have any particular love for Touka or Touken in general. This post is just my honest feelings spilling together because I can’t sleep at night.
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