#yess i love how all these women are friends

[junkartie]

My mom on her way to lecture me about being racist AND ageist because i dont want my sister talking and flirting with a 26 year old (shes 15)

[norrisainz33]

Secrets || CL16 & LH44

☆ summary: y/n hamilton is headed to the olympics and her secret boyfriend (her brothers future teammate) ends up confirming their relationship at the olympics

☆ pairing: charles leclerc x hamilton!reader

☆ fc & warnings: georgia-mae fenton & none

☆ requested: yes! thanks for the olympic gymnast idea 🫶🏻

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

ynhamilton has made a post

liked by lewishamilton, roscoelovescoco, georgerussell63, mercedesamgf1, charlesleclerc, and 645,238 others

ynhamilton: quick someone tell mini me that she’s going to the olympics 🤭

view all 876 comments

user1: AHHHHHH OMG!!! CONGRATS

roscoelovescoco: prouds of you aunties

ynhamilton: thank you my sweet sweet little baby

user2: the hamiltons are going to take over the world just wait

fernandoalo_oficial: show them how it’s done mi princesa

ynhamilton: will do my best nando 🤍

user3: beautiful , perfect , flawless

lewishamilton: that’s my girl! i can’t wait to see you shine

ynhamilton: love you big bro 🤍

user4: the best sibling duo in existence

user5: y’all see charles hiding in the likes 🫣

user6: y/n prolly giggling and kicking her feet rn

user7: girl says she has a crush on a certain ferrari driver one time and you guys won’t let her live it down 😭

user6: user7 don’t forget that one time they were caught hanging out

user7: user6 she was in the paddock for her brothers race!!

user6: idk the way he was looking at her was anything but casual user7

ynhamilton has posted to her story

view all story replies

user5: YOU MADE IT

user7: style icon y/n is in the building

lewishamilton: 💪🏻 win us a medal sis

ynhamilton: win me a race brother! also give roscoe a kiss for me please - i already miss him :(

lewishamilton: he misses you too

user8: the olympics should be thanking you for participating fr

charlesleclerc: good luck mon amour ❤️

ynhamilton: thank you charlie! i wish you could be here

charlesleclerc: i know darling im sorry i cant be!

user9: brb buying this exact set as we speak

user10: mother has landed

roscoelovescoco has made a post

liked by ynhamilton, lewishamilton, charlesleclerc, landonorris, teamgb, simonebiles, mercedesamgf1, and 436,125 others

roscoelovescoco: we loves aunties y/n! watching froms homes but still so prouds 🇬🇧 p.s my new friend leos watches withs us

view all 345 comments

user11: roscoe’s insta will always be one of my favorite things on the internet

user12: roscoe supporting his favorite auntie is the sweetest

lewishamilton: roscoe would be there if he could! good luck today, y/n/n 🫶🏻🇬🇧

ynhamilton: big big love to you both 🤍

user22: look at grandpa using his emojis

ynhamilton: i love you with my whole heart roscoe

roscoelovescoco: roscoe loves y/ns

user13: hold on is he talking abt leo leclerc

user6: are charles and lewis watching y/n??? together?????? no way

user9: is roscoe hard launching y/ncharles

charlesleclerc: leo is wishing y/n all the best today ❤️

ynhamilton: thank you little leo ❤️

user6: guys i swear they are together

user7: user6 im gonna hold ur hand when i say this

texts between you and charles

ynhamilton has made a post

liked by teamgb, charlesleclerc, fernandoalo_oficial, lewishamilton, patriciooward, and 762,194 others

ynhamilton: i’m headed to the finals! oh what a surreal feeling this is. being an olympian was and always has been a dream of mine since i was a little girl so to step on this mat and to make it this far is the blessing of a life time ✨

view all 887 comments

user12: CONGRATS GORGEOUS

user87: hamilton hamilton hamilton

fernandoalo_oficial: proud is an understatement

ynhamilton: 🤍

lewishamilton: you’re a star

ynhamilton: that’s you mr champion

user13: how does she make everything she does look so beautiful

user14: i love seeing women succeed

charlesleclerc: truly incredible performance

ynhamilton: 🥹 thank you charlie

user6: he’s here

roscoelovescoco: yess yous are the bests in the worlds

teamgb: that’s our girl! making us proud out there y/n 🇬🇧🤍

charlesleclerc has posted on his story

view story replies

user98: and where are we headed mr leclerc? paris perhaps?

ynhamilton: holy moly you look incredible 🤤

charlesleclerc: merci mon coeur ❤️

user65: why you looking at me like that

fernandoalo_oficial: you better bring our girl some luck !

charlesleclerc: working on it 💪🏻

lewishamilton: see you soon mate

user23: ARE YOU GOING TO PARIS YES OR NO

user34: ohhhh you look scrumptious

user44: i already miss seeing your car go round in circles

f1gossip has made a post

liked by user1, user2, user5, user6, yourbff, user8, user7 and 154,354 others

f1gossip: Lewis Hamilton pictured attending the Olympic gymnastics finals to support his sister y/n! the surprise of the evening is that Charles Leclerc is also in attendance and sitting with Lewis and y/n’s friends. there’s been quite a few rumblings that y/n and Charles are a couple - is this confirmation?

view all 304 comments

user44: lewis ages like fine wine istg

user16: CHARLES LECLERC AT THE OLYMPICS?! that twitter user was right

user6: I KNEW IT!!! I KNEWWWWW IT!! Y/NCHARLES FOR LIFE

user8: maybe they’re just bonding before next season

user65: forza ferrari!!!

user10: odd place to choose for a bonding event

user21: idk if i even want mother with that man

user17: out of all the drivers he’s not a bad choice

user18: the english and monegasque royal family’s coming together ,, it’s so beautiful

ynhamilton has made a post

liked by lewishamilton, scuderiaferrari, patriciooward, charlesleclerc, fernandoalo_oficial, nicorosberg, yourbff, and 456,321 others

ynhamilton: regardless of the outcome i’m proud of me, i’m proud of my teammates and i’m proud to represent team gb. obviously a medal would have been nice but when you have competition like THE simone biles just being here is a win. thank you to lewie, yourbff1, charles and yourbff2 for making the trip to paris to cheer me on 🤍🇬🇧

view all 546 comments

user28: you’re still a medalist in my book

yourbff1: my bestie is that girl ✨

user29: the hamilton genes are insane

yourbff2: you are the most incredible, talented, amazing, perfect, gorgeous, slay, demure woman in the whole world

lewishamilton: proud big brother moment! was such an amazing experience to get to cheer you on and experience the atmosphere. i love you sissy ❤️

ynhamilton: wouldn’t be here without the support from the best big brother in the world 🤍

user37: that leo is gorgeous

simonebiles: you have so much to be proud of! great job out there y/n 🤍

ynhamilton: you have no idea how much that means to me!! thank you simone 🥹

charlesleclerc: i think red is your color 😉

charlesleclerc: but for real, félicitations ma belle

ynhamilton: i think it might be my color too 😏

user6: omgomgomgomgokgogm

nicorosberg: congratulations to my favorite hamilton

ynhamilton: thank you nico 🤭

user33: HAHAH NICO BFFR

georgerussell63: you made us proud y/n/n!!

ynhamilton: georgie!!!! i 🤍 u

charlesleclerc has made a post

liked ynhamilton, scuderiaferrari, carlossainz55, lewishamilton, yourbff, teamgb, roscoelovescoco and 876,213 others

charlesleclerc: was lucky enough to take the prettiest girl in all of paris out last night ❤️

view all 876 comments

user19: if charles had to be taken off the market im at least glad it’s y/n

roscoelovescoco: yous betters be goods to my favorites aunties or i’ll bites you ❤️❤️❤️❤️

charlesleclerc: don’t worry roscoe, i’ll treat her like the princess she is 🤍 (leo would also bite me, he likes her more than me so it’s ok)

ynhamilton: you’ll be the first to hear abt it if he doesn’t roscoe 😘

user13: get him roscoe!

user56: the way their outfits match ,, please

ynhamilton: the best date ever 🤍

charlesleclerc: je t'aime mon olympien [i love you my olympian]

user18: the hard launch to end all hard launches

maxverstappen1: oh thank god. now we can finally play padel not in secret

ynhamilton: is that all you care about max

maxverstappen1: ….. no

user6: i hope you know i’ve been ride or die for you two for months now

ynhamilton: i know girly

user6: ok wow idk how to act uhhh hi y/n 😭😭😭

user34: i mean look at them im sick. i cant wait for lewis and y/n to be at ferrari next season

user87: the girlfriend effect already taking hold i see ,, that is a fine suit charles

scuderiaferrari: we’re glad red suits her so well 😉

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

a/n: thank you for reading!! likes and reblogs appreciated! still making my way through my requests, thank you for being patient with me :)

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[sterredem]

Descendants

F1 grid x driver!rookie!reader

Face claim Pinterest girls

Warning Mention if addict (max with RedBull), Not proofread, spelling mistakes, long

Summary the new rookie on the grid is obsessed with descendants and makes it everyone’s problem

A/N bsf/n = best friends name (for anyone that didn’t know)

I like it! I hope y’all also do. It’s pretty long and I made it over here course of a few weeks so there can be parts where it doesn’t fit so if you notice that please say it so I can fix it! I have also had my descendants obsession come back with the new movie. (Still deciding if I like it or not)

Please repost and comments it helps a lot! Feadback is also appropriated!❤️🫶

Instagram

Liked by LewisHamilton and 2.735.567 others

f1 BREAKING: Y/n y/l/n will make the step in 2025, signing a multi-deal with Red Bull! ✍️

View all 8.276 comments

User1 YES!! 💜💙

User2 OMG? Already up to red bull? I would suspect that she would go to rb first!

User3 There are going to be a LOT of GenZ on the grid! It’s gonna be chaos!

User4 wait till everyone finds out how crazy and a PR nightmare she is 💜💙

User5 LETS GOOOO

User6 power duo with her and max

User7 Women in F1 again??

User8 YESS!! 💜💙 I have loved her ever since F3!

User9 Why do so people use the blue and purple heart?

User8 its an inside joke with her and the fans. It’s better if you get to know it through something else (I’m not trying to gatekeep its also just really hard to explain)

User9 alright. I’ll look it up.

User10 not really surprised

User11 she’s so pretty

User12 why do they say multi-year and not the year?! ITS SO ANNOYING!!

|———————————<3—————————————|

Instagram

Liked by RedBullRacing and 926.752 others

Y/n_Racing Ready for 2025 with red bull. Already binge drink wing this drink. Happy to drive the bull for a few year (hopefully a long time)💪

View all 9.968 comments

RedBullRacing Happy to have you on our team next year💪

MaxVerstappen1 2 history makes in the same team… this is gonna be fun. Happy to have you as a team mate

Prema_Team Sad to let you go, but happy to see you in f1. Great job Y/n💪

User1 HISTORY MAKER!!

User2 Why is this such a dry caption? From what I’ve heard she is a PR problem but this doesn’t seem like it

User3 she is… she has a second account that is managed by herself and that is the chaotic and problematic one. PR has tried to take it away but she always finds a way to get it back. So they’ve given up. I think I’m a few minutes she is gonna post on their and cause a problem of post a chaotic post

User4 FINNALY A WOMEN AGAIN!!

User5 she will be the inspiration to Kay many jong girls

User6 Already looking forwards to the next season!

User7 wait… so where is Carlos going?

User8 her and Ollie being on the grid together is just so funny to me. They are going to cause havoc

User9 I already love her and I’ve only seen a PR made post

User10 💜💙

User11 wait till everyone sees her descendants obsession. They won’t think the same about her

User12 she is so pretty

User13 she looks so nice😊

|———————————<3—————————————|

Instagram

Liked by bsfuser and 745.578 others

Y/n_Real Just vid announced as a RedBull driver… I think I need to change the aesthetic to red…… good this the new descendants movie will be with a lot of blue (and Evie will be our saviour!)!! Als the 5th picture is how it feeling rn.

View all 14.852 comments

Bsfuser AAAHHHH IM SO HAPPY!!!!

Y/n_Real YESSSSS

Bfsuser Also the rise of red and Evie our saviour 🙏🙏

Y/n_Real REAL!!🙏🙏

User1 AAAHHH!!! IM SO PROUD

Y/n_Real THANK YOU!!💋💋

User2 OMG I FOUND THE SECOND ACCOUNT!! And user3 was right!

User3 Always eats with her posts

User4 The mal picture is so real

User5 I love how she interacts with her fans in this account

User6 wait why rise of red? Isn’t that Ferrari?

Y/n_Real yes. But CINDERELLA AND HER DAUGHTER! (Sorry for being passive aggressive I am just SO EXITED ABOUT EVERYTHING (but they are both blue so yaya red bull!))

User7 I love her and bsf/n’ relationship!

User8 do you know how they became friends? I’ve seen a lot about them but I’m just wondering

User7 yes I know! They became friends at a comic con event for the 3rd descendents movie where they sat next to each other so they began talking and became friends

User8 That so funny! How do y’all know all this?

User7 sometimes Y/n or bsf/n go live and just talks a lot

User9 The make up looks so good!!

User10 you are so pretty

User11 Post 941 of Y/n putting mal in her post (don’t break this streak sweetie)

Y/n_Real OMG YOUR STILL HERE!! I love you!!

User11 ILY TOO

|———————————<3—————————————|

Instagram

Liked by Kyliecantrall and 626.735 others

Y/n_Real SO PROUD OF YOU KYLIE!!! All that aside… I am soooo proud of you Kyliecantrall and I’m very happy that you have made it this far!

For anyone that’s nee here: this is my VERY talented friend Kylie, and she has made it into a Descendant movie!! I have had the honours to go to the premiere and to have known this lovely lady for quite some time!

Love you Kylie and you did an AMAZING job playing Red!!

(Also 5th picture is how I felt at the premiere)

View all 9.925 comments

Kyliecantrall I LOVE YOUUUU!!!💋❤️💕

Y/n_Real ILYYY 22222!!!! 💋💕❤️

Bsfuser I LOVE U KYLIEE!!!

Kyliecantrall I LOVE YOUT TWOOOO!!!😘😘

User1 I love her friendship with bsf/n and Kylie

User2 OMG SHE WAS AT A DESCENDANT PREMIERE!!!

User3 I WAS SO EXITED WHEN U SAW HER!!

User4 real ones know who Kylie is and her friendship with Y/n and bsf/n

User5 Now the male picture again😂

User6 I’m still so confused at this

|———————————<3—————————————|

Instagram

Liked by Bsfuser and 767.725 others

Y/n_Real New team, new me (Also this wasn’t my plan Bsf/n dragged me into this)

View all 8.726 comments

Bsfuser Don’t say I dragged you into this. It was YOUR plan

Y/n_Real STOP SPREADING LIES!!

User7 It looks so good!

User8 Why does this seem so random?

User9 My new fav brunette and black haired duo

User10 I love you both!!

User11 you both give me dark academia vibes and I’m LOVING it!

User12 So cute!

User13 and there we go with mal… again (not complaining)

|———————————<3—————————————|

Instagram

Liked by Bsfuser and 925.725 others

Y/n_Racing Life as a newly brunette and attending an f1 race as an announced driver for the first time

View all 9.926 comments

Redbullracing Happy to have you and glad we can see more of you next year😊

Maxverstappen1 It was nice seeing you again!

Alex_albon I see you have already taken after my hair dyeing. Welcome me the grid Y/n

Bsfuser Rude that you didn’t invite me🙄

User1 Brown hair looks good on you

User2 she is really living the dream life: going to premiers and f1 races and also going to drive in f1 and being besties with descendants cast members

User3 just wait until she meets dove Cameron or Sophia Carson, she WILL freak out

Y/n_Racing DONT EXPOSE ME!

User4 my favourite celebrity

User5 So happy to see you on the grid next year!

User6 just wait until the grid sees her descendant obsession.

|———————————<3—————————————|

Time skip to 6 races in the season

Twitter

|———————————<3—————————————|

Instagram

Liked by DoveCameron and 1.564.254 others

Y/n_Real A real dream come true! Me and @bsfuser met the people that started our friendship!!! It was an absolute dream meeting @DoveCameron and @SophiaCarson !

(We also got some great advise… you will see it soon)

View all 123.625 comments

DoveCameron I also had a great time meeting you! Liked by author

SophiaCarson It was lovely meeting you and bsf/n (I also hope you can do something with what I said) liked by author

Bsfuser THIS STILL FEELS LIEK A DREAM!!

Y/n_Real FOR REAL

OscarPiastri Weirdo. I noticed you where obsessed with descendants with the music that always comes from your drivers room but this…

Y/n_Real Says the one that is doing a movie marothon from descendants with his girlfriend

User7 AHHHH THEY MET!!!!

User8 What did they tell you?!

Y/n_Real It’s a secret 🤫🤫🤫

User9 Not this being one of the only posts with over a million likes😭😂

User10 I love how the drives are already aware and done with her descendants obsession

User11 I AM SO JEALOUS!!

User12 I love that for y’all!! (Totally not jealous and not sarcastic)

User13 Them also commenting🫠🫠 so cuteee!!!

|———————————<3—————————————|

Liked by Descendants and 1.725.267 others

Y/n_Real Dove, Sophia, Bsfuser, Alex, Kylie and a lot of the drivers + descendants movie cast said I should do it… so I did. New hair era!!!

View all 267.275 comments

DoveCameron It looks so good!!

Y/b_Real Thank you!

SophiaCarson I said it would be a good idea!

Y/n_Real And you were right!

Bsfuser Should I go blue?

Y/n_Real YES!!

Alex_albon Already going for my bit I see

Y/n_Real you’ve never done purple soo…

OscarPiastri This is really beginning to become a problem

Landonorris True

Zhouguanyu24 True

Hulkhulkenberg I also see it

Logansargeant I also do

Yukitsunoda0511 Same with me

Valtteribottas I fear I also see it

Kevinmagnussen I also see this becoming a problem

PierreGasly I also do… and why purple? There are a lot of different… better colours

Lancestroll I have to admit I also see this as a problem…

DanielRiccardo Why doe it kinda look good??

EstebanOcan It doesn’t…

Fernandoalo_Oficial It does, shut up Estie

Carlossainz55 Yeah shut up Esteban

LewisHamilton It looks really good Y/n!

Y/n_Real Thank you Lewis!

LewisHamilton Also I also think Descendants is a great movie series

Y/n_Real YESSS!!

Maxverstappen1 Obsessed

Y/n_Real Says the RedBull addict

Charles_Leclerc should I now also whatch it? I want to but I think I’ve already heard to many spoilers from you

Y/n_Real watch it.

User1 All the drivers in the comments😭😂

User2 I think the grid noticed her obsession

User3 They FINNALY caught up!

User4 The hair looks amazing!

User5 everyone here talking about the hair but has anyone seen the make up?? IT LOOKS AMAZING!!

User6 Y/n had really made it now

|———————————<3—————————————|

[doomhands-jr]

The Devil's Advocate - Chapter 3

Noah Sebastian X Reader

Noah is a delinquent with a lot of anger at the church. You're a pastor's daughter plagued by moral perfectionism, charged with overseeing the community service he's been sentenced to complete. You've never encountered true temptation before. How will you fare up against Noah, who not only isn't bound by the same rules of purity as you, but actively scoffs at them?

Rating: 18+ Minors DNI

Masterlist

Banner by @flowerynerds

Wheeeeeeee!

________

“Heavenly father,” Isaac began. “We ask that you bless this practice session. Allow us to spread your love and light through our music and give us the opportunity to reach the souls that need to hear it. Amen.”

“Amen,” the rest of you repeated.

“Alright, friends. What songs do we want to play this week?”

“I’ve been leaning towards How He Loves Us,” said Darian.

“Okay. I’ll need to refresh myself on the chords,” said Isaac. “Everyone on board?”

You nodded along with the others, but as they talked over the song list, you found yourself losing focus. Your eyes drifted over to the front of the stage, where you and Noah had sat on Saturday.

You were always so sure that if presented with temptation, you would be able to resist. It had never once entered your mind that there would be a situation in which your resolve would be tested.

But there on those steps, with Noah looking down over you, you knew you would have let your body take over and do whatever it wanted. For the first time in your life, you weren’t sure you could trust yourself with someone—and yet, you weren’t convinced it was a bad thing.

Okay, were you ready to lose your virginity to him? No. That was a big step to take, considering you’d only ever had one kiss in your life, but you couldn’t deny that you were eager to explore your sexuality more, and that had never been something you were willing to do outside of marriage.

Noah’s logic had you questioning the rules that had been instilled in you. He seemed to think that the rules, particularly those surrounding sex, were not worth following. He had such a confidence about it that you were dying to question where he got it from and what his reasoning behind it was.

Something tugged in the back of your mind, though. Isaac had cautioned you about spending time with him, and how he could lead you down a bad path. You felt yourself straying from what you had always believed, but were they right? Were you being led into a life of sin?

Or was it more complicated than that?

“Okay, everyone clear on the set list for this week?”

You nodded, even though you weren’t clear, but you’d pick it up easily enough. You could always ask Ava if you needed help.

“Hey, can I talk to you a minute?”

It was Isaac. He was closer than you remembered him being. “Sure, what’s up?”

“I was wondering if I could get your help with something?”

“Okay?” you said, waiting for him to continue.

“So I want to put together a Christmas concert. I could use your voice. And your help with setting it up if you’re down for it.”

“Halloween isn’t even over,” you said.

“These things take time to arrange. It’s better if we get a head start.” He flashed a smile at you and rocked back on his heels, visibly eager for you to agree.

“What all would I need to do?” you asked.

“Really, I just need you to sing the soprano harmonies. And to spread the word about it. Maybe hang some fliers or something. See if any of the women in your dorm want to come. I’m thinking this could be a great outreach project if we maybe add an alter call or something at the end.”

You didn’t want to. You knew you didn’t want to, but you needed something to focus on that wasn’t Noah and the way he had you questioning everything about yourself. 

“I’ll think about it,” you said.

“Yess,” he hissed, already taking it as a begrudging agreement, instead of a consideration. “Promise you won’t regret it.”

“Uh-huh.”

The rest of the session was spent practicing the songs for the upcoming service. You wished you had the ability to stay focused, but all you could think about was the softness behind Noah’s eyes when he looked at you, and how eager you were for Saturday to arrive.

______

“Noah can’t come,” Nick said, walking up the concrete pathway that led to the church ground. “He got roped into working overtime at the factory. Won’t be off until 3.”

“Oh,” you said, trying not to let your disappointment show. “Sucks for him.”

“Not really. At least he’s getting paid,” he said. “Otherwise he’d have to be here, doing work for free.”

“Right,” you agreed. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

“So what’s on the menu for today?” he asked, sounding much more chipper than last week.

“Sorting donations. Our church is holding a drive to help families in need. We’re sorting clothes by size and gender—,”

“Gender is a construct,” he cut in.

“Okay, so by size and masculine vs. feminine then.”

"And what if it's gender-neutral?" he asked.

You sighed. "Use your judgement."

“Got it,” he said and punctuated it with a nod.

“And then if we get done with that, we’ll sort toys by age, and then food by type and expiration date.”

“That sounds like a lot.”

“You shrugged. We’ll just do as much as we have time for.”

You led him down into the basement of the worship center, where all the donation boxes were stored.

“Start with that box. We’ll start sorting it based on gen—er, feminine verses masculine first. Then we’ll do children’s versus adults, and after that, go by size. Feminine clothes go there, masculine over there, you said, pointing to piles on two different tables.

“Sounds good,” he said, picking up a box and getting to work. You got back to work sifting through the box you’d been working on before he had arrived, picking up the clothes, judging which pile they belonged in and whether they were in good enough condition to rehome.

“Make sure you check for things like stains and tears. We don’t want to be sending people damaged things.”

“Got it,” he said.

Nick paused to remove his black hoodie, and you allowed yourself to sneak a glance over at him while he worked. He wore a black shirt with the sleeves cut off, exposing tattoos on his arms, though not nearly as many as Noah. He was more muscular than you realized, biceps flexing and relaxing as he folded the clothes.

“I see you staring,” he said and you looked up at him to find him smirking at you.

“I was looking at your tattoos.”

“Sure you were,” he said. “Go ahead and stare. I don’t mind.”

“I wasn’t staring,” you said, looking away from him and back down to the pile of clothes you were sorting.

“And here I was thinking I’d finally caught the Virgin Mary in an act of lust.”

“Sorry to disappoint you.”

He slid out from behind the table he was working at and stood next to you, picking up a shirt from the pile in front of you and checking the tag.

“What are you doing?” you asked.

“Just thought you looked like you could use some help over here.”

You rolled your eyes. “Fine.”

The pair of you worked together in tense silence. You had to admit, the work did go much faster when he was helping. Nick worked hard and rhythmically, settling into a pace that easily bested yours. Every so often, his arm would brush up against yours, and you couldn’t figure out if it was on purpose.

“My god, who donated this?!” he exclaimed after a while. You looked over and he was holding a pair of bright yellow children’s pants with a brown stain across the back, his face scandalized.

You snorted loudly. Nick caught it and his face lit up with his own laughter, and the two of you devolved into a fit of giggles.

“We should probably toss that one,” you said after regaining your composure and pointed to the trash can in the corner. He agreed, balling the garment up and tossing it into the trash, easily sinking it into the basket even though it was across the room.

“Do you think the rest are contaminated?” he asked.

You shook your head. “The organizers washed all of these in big industrial washers. It’s just a stain. Still gross though.”

“Still gross,” he agreed.

“Alright, since we’re almost done with this box, I’m gonna grab the next one,” you said, but before you could even try to lift it, Nick had stepped in front of you, hoisting it easily up onto the table with no effort. Impressive, considering you’d been struggling to even lift the boxes of clothing yourself.

“Thanks,” you said.

“No problem. Hey, so you know how I always say you could use more fun.”

You paused folding the shirt in your hands and raised an eyebrow. 

“Don’t give me that look. You know it’s true.”

You maintained your cool expression.

“Well, we’re doing a Halloween gig tonight at Jolly’s. You should come.”

You considered it. If the band was playing, that meant Noah would be there, and you’d get to see what he’s like outside of community service. It sounded tempting, but—

“I already committed to handing out candy to trick-or-treaters with the worship team.”

Nick let out a sound of annoyance. “Are you always doing church stuff?”

You laughed. “Kind of.”

“Well, what time does it go until?” he asked.

“I think trick-or-treat ends at 8:30.”

“Perfect,” he said. “The party doesn’t even start until after 9:00.”

You considered for a moment, not sure if it would be a good idea.

“I can practically hear you talking yourself out of it.”

“It’s just…,” you began.

“You’re worried you’ll get pulled into a life of sin?” he finished. “Come on. It’s one party. You don’t even have to drink.”

You thought about it. It could be interesting to see the band perform. Get an idea of the kind of music Noah’s into.

“Can I bring a friend?” you asked.

He chuckled, “sure, if it’ll get you to come.”

“Okay. Where should I go?”

Nick smiled. “Where’s your dorm? I can pick you and your friend up there at 9:00 and we’ll head over together.”

“Sounds good.”

“Oh, and wear a costume.”

_______

“No way! Really?!” Ava half-shouted.

“Don’t go crazy. I’m bringing you to be my accountability partner,” you said. “Make sure I don’t make any bad decisions while I’m there.”

“What bad decisions would you even make?” she said, “You’re the most responsible out of all of us.”

“I don’t know,” you said. “I’ve never been to this kind of party before, so I don’t know what to expect.”

“We’ll be fine,” she said. “Don’t be such a worrier.”

She had a point. You doubted you were going to do anything. But then again, you had experienced your first real temptation only a week ago, and had Nick not walked in, you weren’t one hundred percent positive you would have resisted.

Only time would tell.

_________

Trick-or-treating went smoothly. You and the rest of the worship band got dressed up in your costumes and handed out candy from the steps leading up to the church. Other organizers in your congregation had set up a mini obstacle course for the children, and a table full of apple cider and glazed donuts stood beside it, with many members of the church gathered around it.

These were the kinds of events you loved helping out at. There was such a sense of community that made you feel like you were part of something greater than yourself. Seeing the joy on everyone’s faces made putting up with the more annoying tasks well worth it.

Ava dressed as a medieval princess in a flowing white and pink gown. Isaac went as a pirate. Darian and Josh wore matching “Thing 1” and “Thing 2” costumes. You were dressed as your favorite historical president, but with a twist. The kids loved your costumes, but their own costumes were just as creative.

Part of the event that the church put on involved a costume contest, where the winner would receive a gift certificate for free pizza, soda, and dessert at the local pizza restaurant. It wasn’t much, but the kids had gone all out for it.

You and the worship band were in charge of judging the costumes, and after much deliberation between the robot (your choice) and the wolverine (Isaac’s choice), the robot eventually won out.

“It had blinking LEDs and functioning buttons with sound effects!” you said, when Isaac was salty about the outcome.

“The kid had home-made retractable claws! Do you know how much engineering that takes?”

“Sorry. The results were fair.”

“Whatever. What are you guys doing after this? Want to go bowling?”

“Actually, we already have plans,” Ava said.

“Oh? Where are you going?”

“We were invited to watch a local band.”

“Oh nice. Where is it? I might want to stop by.”

“Oh, uh. I actually don’t know. Our friend is going to pick us up,” you said, growing nervous.

Isaac’s eyes narrowed. “Which friend?”

You shifted, not knowing how to answer him. 

“It’s the delinquents,” said Ava, unconcerned with the tension that had grown. “Calm down, we’ll be fine.”

Isaac looked at you as if you had told him you were going to a strip club. “That sounds like a really bad idea,” he said. “Are you sure about this? Do you want me to escort you?”

“Yes I’m sure. And no, we don’t need a chaperone. It’s just listening to a band.”

“Yeah,” said Isaac. “A secular band.”

“Isaac chill. She asked me to be her accountability partner. She’s covered. Now if you’ll excuse me, we have to get going.”

Ava grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you away. Isaac looked like he wanted to follow, but thought better of it and turned away.

“You’re welcome for that, by the way,” she said when the two of you were out of earshot.

“Thanks. I owe you,” you said. “What’s his problem?”

“He doesn’t like them. He’s been talking to me about it. He believes they’re bad news, but I think he’s just jealous, to be honest. You’re no longer paying attention to him the way you used to and he knows it.”

“What a crybaby,” you said.

“I mean, can you blame him? You spent the last several years at his beck and call, and now suddenly you dip.”

“That’s not exactly fair,” you said. “You were the same way with him.”

“Yeah, well, maybe both of us are to blame.”

“You might be right.”

You and Ava reached your dorm, where Ava stripped off the overskirt of her dress, revealing a much shorter version of her costume, complete with knee socks and heels.

“Whoa!” you exclaimed.

“I told you I wanted to experience life on the other side,” she said. “This is my chance. Don’t judge me.”

“Honestly, I’m more impressed than anything. But I don’t know. Maybe it’s a little much for your first party? Like, should you scope it out first before taking a risk like that?”

Ava shrugged. “I’m tired of the same boring things every day. I could use a little risk-taking.”

You bit back your comments, knowing that you weren’t going to change her mind. She was headstrong, which you loved about her, but it also worried you at times.

“Just don’t get too carried away, okay?” you said.

“I’m going to have at least one drink while I’m there.”

“You’re supposed to be my accountability partner!”

“I can still hold you accountable. It’s just one drink.”

You sighed and rubbed your forehead, acknowledging to yourself that it may have been a mistake to bring her.

“Please just don’t make me babysit you the whole time. I want to enjoy myself.”

“I promise. I’ll keep my wits about me. I’ll have one drink. We’ll listen to the music, maybe do a little dancing. Maybe I’ll have my first kiss, and then we’ll be home by midnight.”

You groaned. “Drinking and kissing? That’s a lot to pack into one night.”

“It’ll be fine,” she insisted. “Don’t worry about me. You just focus on enjoying yourself, okay? This is your first real party. You should be excited for you! Not worried for me.”

As if on cue, there was a knock on your door. You looked at the clock on your phone and it read 8:57.

“He’s early for once.”

You opened the door to reveal Nick’s bare chest with the image of an eagle holding a fish inked onto it. A tiny purple vest barely covered his shoulders.  “Aladdin?” you asked.

“At your service,” he said, lifting the fez he wore up in salute.

“Nice,” you commented. “Nick, this is Ava.”

“Princess Ava,” he said, taking her hand and kissing the back of it. “I like your costume.”

Ava burst into a fit of giggles at the flattery. “Yours too.”

“Don’t get any ideas,” you said to Nick, already knowing what he was thinking. You saw his eyes scan up and down Ava’s legs.

“What are you supposed to be?” he asked. “A sexy founding father?”

“Baberaham Lincoln,” you clarified, fiddling with the fake beard to ensure its placement.

He scanned you up and down. “I guess I see it,” he said slowly. “But to truly pass as a babe-ified version of Lincoln, I think you need to be a little sexier.”

“I wore red lipstick,” you defended.

“You could stand to undo a few buttons on your shirt. Or tie it up to make a crop top,” Ava suggested.

“I’m good,” you said.

Nick shrugged. “Suit yourself. Come on.”

You and Ava followed him out the door and began your walk towards town. Jolly’s house was supposedly a mile or so away from campus. The wind carried a chill, but Ava and Nick seemed to not notice, too enraptured in conversation. They were obviously flirting, and you’d have to remember to warn Ava about him. And threaten Nick.

The walk was quicker than you expected, and you vaguely recognized the part of town Jolly lived in. The house was light blue with black shutters. It spanned two floors, but wasn’t in great shape. Partygoers spilled out onto the front porch and lawn, all dressed in a variety of costumes. You noticed most were homemade, and you appreciated that, but they also showed much more skin than you were used to seeing and you felt overdressed. You unbuttoned one button at the top of your blouse.

“So ladies,” Nick said, gesturing to the crowd. “This is a party. Can I get either of you something to drink?”

“I’m fine,” you said.  “I’ll take a drink,” said Ava.

Nick grinned. “Excellent. What would you like?”

“What do they have?” she asked.

“Follow me to the kitchen and I’ll show you.” Nick and Ava made their way into the crowd, while you hung back a few paces, wanting to get your bearings before immersing yourself into the sea of people. You scanned the strangers, looking for Noah, but came up empty.

So this was a party. It looked like people were having fun. They all seemed to be enjoying themselves, but it was very crowded and noisy. You wondered if alcohol was the key to enjoying this. Or perhaps knowing more people. Maybe you just didn’t know anyone so it was hard for you to keep from feeling out of place.

You walked up the steps and across the porch, weaving in and out among partygoers and noticing the various costumes. Superheroes, characters from popular movies and comic book series. A lot of people dressed as celebrities, and then more generic costumes like firefighter and nurse. Several girls walked around in black bodysuits with cat ears and whiskers painted on their faces. You wondered if they all knew each other.

Stepping into the house, you were met with a big cloud of cigarette smoke. It wafted into the air and permeated throughout the entire house. There was another smell too that you didn’t recognize, but you guessed was marijuana.

The tile floor was sticky, you noticed. Your shoes peeled away from the ground with each step and you could almost feel the film they were collecting. It was also hot and humid inside the house, with all the bodies that were crammed in.

Electric neon lights flashed all around in the living room, where several people gathered. It looked like that was where people went to dance. In the kitchen, Ava and Nick leaned up against the counter while Nick poured some red liquid from a large Hawaiian Punch container labeled “jungle juice.” He handed it to Ava and she smiled up at him. His hand went to rest around her waist and she blushed. You’d have to intervene eventually, but for now, you wanted to let Ava have her fun.

You took a swig of water out of the bottle you’d tucked into the inside pocket of your blazer, which was quickly growing too warm. You couldn’t abandon it though, or else nobody would know what you were dressed as—not that it mattered much. Everyone was focused on their own thing, and nobody was paying attention to you.

You found yourself a corner of the living room to stand in and you leaned against the walls, watching the guests as they danced. Some were dancing on each other. Some were making out, while others danced with abandon, twirling their arms above their heads and jumping up and down. It reminded you of summer camp, when you’d do the same thing. Dance with reckless abandon to the worship music—although the context of this dancing was wildly different.

You missed being a kid and getting to participate in all the different activities in the church. Now that you were an adult, you’d taken on more of an organizer and leadership role, overseeing all of these activities. You liked the work, but had much more fun when you were a kid, before all the responsibility kicked in.

A tall figure coming down the stairs caught your eye and you recognized him immediately. He hadn’t seen you yet, and you were perfectly content to watch him from afar.

Noah was dressed in all black. He had switched out his hoodie for a tank top, which displayed the full scope of his tattoos. He wore his hair tied back, but on his head sat a pair of shiny, dark black horns. He held a glass beer bottle in one hand and sipped casually from it.

As he made his way through the crowd, it soon became clear he was one of the more popular guests. Several people went out of their way to greet him by offering high-fives, fist bumps, or by tapping their drinks to his. A couple women were more affectionate—they greeted him by throwing their arms around his neck and wrapping him in a hug, and it was hard to admit your own jealousy to yourself. Noah could have female friends, and it wasn’t a betrayal of whatever small connection the two of you had established. Even still, it was uncomfortable to watch.

You could see the moment he spotted Nick, as he immediately made his way over to them. You were relieved to see he greeted him with more enthusiasm than anyone else. Nick introduced Ava, who shook Noah’s hand. You could see on her face that while she was just as taken aback by the abundance of tattoos as you were originally, she was visibly interested in learning who this newcomer was.

Ava said something else to Noah, who smiled and laughed, and then Nick chimed in, but you couldn’t hear any specifics. In response, Noah perked up and turned to scan the room. Nick leaned toward his friend to mention something else, pointing in your direction, and when Noah finally spotted you, he nodded and started in your direction.

That was your cue to come out of your little secluded corner. Locking eyes with him, you noticed he wore a pair of contacts that completely blacked out his eyes and made him look like a demon, which you supposed was the intent. Despite that, you were warmed by his smile.

When he reached you, he greeted you with a gentle hand on your shoulder and you found yourself wishing you had worn something sleeveless so you could feel the full effect of his touch.

“Hey! What are you doing here?” Noah asked, curious but pleased. “And what are you supposed to be?”

“I’m Baberaham Lincoln!” you said. “I thought more people would get that.”

Noah paused, scanned you up and down, and then doubled over in laughter.

“Thank you,” he said, and surprised you by wrapping you up in a warm hug and pressing you into his chest. “You made my night.”

Noah was very sweaty, and you could smell the slight sourness of body odor on him beneath the patchouli scent, but that didn’t detract from how much you enjoyed the embrace.  

“Are you dressed as a demon?” you asked when he finally pulled away.

“Something like that. I didn’t put much thought into it. Just wanted to look scary.”

“Well, it did the trick,” you said. “Your eyes are kind of freaking me out.”

He smiled down at you in response and despite the unsettling costume, you felt your affection for him grow.

“You don’t mind if I drink, do you?” he asked.

“I’m not here to stop you from having any fun. I’m on your turf now.” You had to lean towards him to be heard over the sound of the music and the crowd.

“I’m really surprised you came,” he confessed. “It doesn’t seem like your normal scene, but I’m glad you’re here.”

“Me too,” you said. Shrouded in his presence, you began to understand the appeal of these parties.

“Fair warning though,” he said, leaning down next to your face so you could hear him. “You probably aren’t going to like our music. It’s not exactly your style.” You were met with the slight pressure of his palm on your lower back, and you wondered if the alcohol had lowered his inhibitions.

“Yeah, I know,” you said, reaching into your pockets and pulling out two foam pieces. “I brought earplugs just in case.”

He grinned, dark contacts not taking away from his genuine delight. “That’s my girl.” Something erupted in your stomach at the nickname. “Hey, come here. I want to introduce you to the band.” He led you by the hand through the party and back out onto the front porch.

“This is Ruffilo and Jolly,” he said, introducing you to two other heavily-tattooed and long-haired men. “You already met Folio, our drummer. Ruffilo plays bass and Jolly pays guitar. His real name is Joakim, but we all call him Jolly.”

“Nice to meet you,” you said, extending your hand to each of them to shake.

“This is that girl I was talking about who oversees the community service.”

“Virgin Mary!” Jolly exclaimed in recognition.

Your face fell and you looked up at Noah sourly.

“Shit,” he said. “That probably wasn’t cool, was it?” he asked.

“No, not really,” you said, stepping away from him.

“Sorry, okay guys. Just Mary. Not Virgin Mary.”

“Man, come on,” you whined, and Noah giggled to himself at his own joke. You realized you were stuck with the nickname, probably for as long as you and Noah would know each other.

“So people keep requesting we play Dethrone,” said Jolly. “I think we should.”

Noah’s eyes glanced over at you and his demeanor turned to hesitant. “No Dethrone,” he said. “I’m not feeling it tonight.”

“Okay, but you don’t get to make decisions for the whole band,” reasoned Ruffilo.

“I don’t know if my voice is up to it,” Noah said. “It’s a hard one to perform.”

Ruffilo sighed. “They’re not going to be happy about it.”

“Maybe next time,” said Noah. “When I remember to bring the Throat Coat.”

Jolly fixed Noah with a look of displeasure, but sighed and relented. “Fine, but don’t neglect your vocal exercises in the future. It’s our biggest crowd-pleaser.”

“Got it,” said Noah. “I won’t.”

Ruffilo pulled out what looked like a hand-wrapped cigarette which you recognized as a joint and lit it up. He took a deep inhale before passing it to Noah, who accepted and sucked back a long drag.

“You don’t mind if I do this, do you?” he intoned, keeping the air trapped in his lungs as he spoke before exhaling a few moments later.

“Not at all,” you said, though something was telling you it was time to take some space.

“Hey, I’m gonna go find Ava,” you said. “You guys have fun.”

“You good?” asked Noah, looking at you with sincerity.

You nodded. “Promise. I just want to check on her.”

“Okay,” he said, taking another drag. “We go on in a few minutes, but I’ll meet up with you after our set. Wait for me?”

“Of course,” you said, softening despite your discomfort.

You didn’t want to leave his side, but if you stayed, you knew you’d be uncomfortable with the situation and you’d already exposed yourself to enough unfamiliarity that night. 

You made your way back into the kitchen, noting that Nick and Ava had moved. You scanned around the house and finally spotted them on the dance floor. He had his arm wrapped around her waist and they were pressed up close to each other. He whispered something into her ear and she threw her head back in laughter.

It was innocent enough, but you’d step in if you felt like you had to.

Wandering through the house, you searched for a quiet spot and a breath of fresh air. You spotted a back door down a short hallway and made a beeline for it, opening to find it a small back yard with a firepit and only a few people standing around it.

You made your way through the yard, past the fire pit and to the back edge where an old shed sat. You leaned against it, closing your eyes and breathing deep. The cool night air filled your lungs, along with the scent of burning wood from the fire.

You were reminded of nights like these spent at church camp during Vespers. Gathering around the campfire and signing along with whoever played the acoustic guitar. Some of the most transformative times of your life happened around those fires. You felt so connected to God. The Holy Spirit permeated through the air, vibrating with intensity and everyone there could feel it. In that moment, you knew that everyone around that fire, no matter where they came from, felt the exact same way you did.

Now, you felt disconnected from your surroundings in an all-consuming way. It was as if everyone else was riding an energetic frequency you couldn’t seem to find and didn’t know if you wanted to. Even Ava, your best friend, assimilated seamlessly into the party atmosphere.

You breathed deeply in and out through your nose and ran your fingertips along the paint that was flaking off the siding of the shed, which served to ground you in the way you needed. You knew you’d have to rejoin the party soon, but you were grateful for this private moment of solace.

As if on cue, the sound of guitars blasted through the back door, demanding your presence. You took out the ear plugs and stuffed them into your ears, the foam muffling the sound and softening the world around you, which had grown abrasive in the last hour or so. _____

The basement floor was damp and even stickier than the kitchen. It was also much more crowded than the upper floor had been now that the entire party was gathered into a single space.

The crowd looked on eagerly as the band set up and did their sound checks. The excitement was tangible and you had no idea Noah’s band had such a following.

“Check. Check,” Noah shouted into the microphone. “I need more in my monitor.” You looked to the back of the room where a small table was set up and someone was running sound.

The sound check took several minutes, but once all the levels were steady, Noah opened his mouth and let out one of the loudest and most demonic sounds you’d ever heard come from a person. You jumped out of your skin, feeling your arm hair stand on end.

Four clicks from Nick’s drumsticks and the entire band joined in, producing a volume even your ear plugs couldn’t compete with.

“Alright you motherfuckers,” Noah shouted. “We’re Bad Omens and we’ve come to steal your souls on this beautiful Hallow-fucking-ween.”

The crowd cheered. Many began jumping up and down in time with the music. The lights flashed from bright green to a deep red, and Noah began to sing.

“Dead on the inside!” 

You never knew live music could be this loud or a crowd this energetic. You’d gone to a few Christian rock concerts, but they were nothing compared to what was happening in front of you.

As the band played through the first few verses of the opening song, the energy of the crowd steadily grew. By the time they hit the crescendo, it looked like a fight had broken out in the audience.

You were immediately put on guard, not sure why nobody else was reacting to it, including the band, when you overserved a few minutes longer and realized that the audience seemed to be…enjoying themselves. It wasn’t a fist fight, you noted. It looked like a bunch of people pushing each other around and flailing their bodies into each other.

Moshing. They were moshing. You remember hearing about it from Isaac, who was into more of the heavier music like The Devil Wears Prada. He said they headlined a Christian music festival he went to over the summer and mentioned that he’d been in a mosh pit, describing what it had been like in vivid detail.

Looking at the audience now, you couldn’t ever imagine someone like Isaac holding their own in a crowd like this.

The next several songs went on like that. The energy of the crowd never died down, and Noah alternated between screaming and singing. You had no idea how his throat could even handle making those noises without bleeding halfway through the first song. You’d have to ask him about that later.

All-in-all, he was right. It definitely wasn’t your preferred style of music, but you could appreciate the passion behind it. Noah’s singing voice was actually beautiful. He hit high notes you’d never heard a man hit before, and he did it with ease. You wished he would stick to that type of singing, but you supposed there had to be an appeal to the screaming, or else the crowd wouldn’t be so lively.

Despite it not being your style, you had fun watching the band perform. Noah’s passion was obvious. He threw his entire body into his performance, letting the music reverberate from deep inside him, and you were content to watch him in his natural habitat.

The juxtaposition was wild. He was normally so closed off and reserved. Here, he was uninhibited. It was like he belonged on a stage and in front of a microphone, and you found yourself feeling happy that he found this outlet for himself.

When the band played their final note, Noah thanked the crowd for coming out and told them all where they could purchase merch and download music.

“Dethrone!” someone shouted from the audience.

“Not tonight, guys. That one’s hard on my throat,” he said.

“Dethrone!” more people shouted. The crowd began to chant over and over again.

“I mean, it’s Halloween. We kind of have to play it,” the man you’d met earlier—Ruffilo—said into the mic.

“Dethrone! Dethrone! Dethrone!” the crowd chanted, and you wondered what kind of song it must be to cause the crowd to react so strongly.

Noah hesitated, looking very torn. He scanned the crowd for a few moments before locking eyes with you and his face held a look of what you could only describe as apology. He held eye contact with you for several minutes, and then he sighed and turned back to the crowd.

“Alright all you fucking cowards, this one’s called Dethrone, and I want to see you tear this fucking place to the ground.”

The guitar came in with a fast and heavy riff for a few bars before the bass and drum joined them. The lights flashed on and off and Noah let out a deep, guttural growl that lasted several bars.

The crowd went absolutely feral. The entire audience began thrashing around and pushing up against one another. Even at the back of the room, you got shoved left and right.

Throughout the noise of the crowd and the screaming you could only make out bits and pieces of the lyrics.

“…when I was killed and born again.” 

“If he’s home I’ve got a message from below. Fuck you.” 

“…Take me to the pearly gates, so I can look you in the eye when I spit in your face.” 

The moment you realized what the song was about, you reached your breaking point. You had to get out of there. You did your best to navigate your way over to the stairs through the sea of thrashing people. You were almost to the steps when someone slammed an elbow hard into the side of your face.

“Ow!” you shouted, but nobody paid attention. You reached the railing and pulled yourself up from the crowd, rushing up the stairs as fast as you could and outside the back door of the house.

You could still hear the song from the outside, but it was muffled enough for you to take a few deep breaths. Your face stung where it had been hit, and you had to shake your hands vigorously to steady yourself.

It was too much. It was all too much. Not just the party and the drinking and the drug use, but the anger of it all. The violence. The deliberate threats made towards the God you’ve known and loved your entire life. The hatred towards Him. And it felt personal. It felt like an attack on everything you’ve built your life around.

You let out a choked sound, no longer able to hold the tears back. You covered your mouth with your hand, trying hard not to make noises in case anyone was around, and stumbled your way to the back of the shed, where hopefully nobody could witness your state.

Inside, you heard the song come to an end and the crowd give one final cheer for the band.

You knew the crowd would be dispersing soon and there was a chance someone would stumble upon you. The yard was completely fenced in and in order to get out, you’d have to go through the house.

You sank to your knees, clutching at the frigid blades of grass, which helped steady you a little. Tears still pouring down, you tried to steady your breathing as best as you can, when you heard your name being called.

It was Noah. You didn’t want to answer him. Didn’t want him to see you like this. In your head, you prayed a silent prayer he would go back into the house and let you compose yourself in peace.

God, however, had other plans.

“Shit,” Noah said as he turned the corner of the shed and found you. “I’m so sorry you had to see that.” He knelt down in front of you, trying to get a look at your face. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” you choked out.

“Shit,” he said again, noticing your tears. “Come on, let me walk you home.”

You shook your head. “I don’t want to go back through there.” You hid your face, feeling ashamed at your own reaction.

“Come on, let’s talk,” he said, grabbing your hand and trying to pull you to your feet.

“I said I’m fine,” you protested. This time it came out sharper. You didn’t want to take your feelings out on him, but you found it impossible to control your tone in the moment.

“Let’s at least get you into a quiet room. Come on, my studio is in this shed. Nobody will bother you. Promise.”

At the promise of a quiet space with nobody to see you, you relented and allowed him to lead you around the side of the shed. He unclipped a set of keys from a carabiner on his belt loop and used one of them to unlock the door, ushering you inside. He relocked it behind him and plugged in a set of string lights that cast the room in a warm, dim glow.

“Have a seat,” he said and gestured to the couch that lined the wall on one side. You obeyed, sitting on the couch and doubling over, arms crossed over your legs and head buried in them. You continued to work to steady yourself.

Noah set a box of tissues beside you, and then rolled his desk chair in front of where you were sitting. He sat facing you, long legs on either side of your knees. Then he placed his hands firmly on your shoulders.

“Is this okay?” he asked.

You nodded into your arms. 

“Are you okay?” he asked.

You nodded again.

“What happened?” he asked, voice softer now.

“I had a panic attack.” Your voice came out muffled.

“Because of the song?” he said.

You nodded again.

“Shit,” he said for the third time.

“And I got elbowed in the face.”

“Shit.” A fourth. “Can I see?”

You shook your head no.

“Please? I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

Reluctantly, you lifted your head to show him.

He let out a compressed breath. “Oof. Yeah, it looks like you’ve got yourself a bit of a shiner,” he said, cupping your face gently.

You refused to meet his eyes, instead opting for a tissue so you could blow your nose. An embarrassing amount of mucus shot into the tissue. Then you pulled a second one to wipe off any makeup that may have smeared.

“Does it hurt?”

You sniffled and nodded. “Yeah.”

“Shit.”

“Is that your favorite word or something?”

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I should have warned you about the crowd. I’m so used to that stuff now. I forget what it’s like for someone who’s never been to a show like that before.”

“It’s fine,” you said.

“It’s not though. I’d been drinking. I didn’t have my wits about me, and because of that you got hurt.”

You sighed. “It wasn’t the elbow,” you said, finally meeting his eyes. His brows furrowed with concern and he let his hands slide down to rest on your knees, thumbs rubbing gentle circles over them. You could only handle eye contact for a second before you had to look away again. “Is that how you really feel?”

Noah puffed out a breath. “I didn’t want you to have to see that.”

“I knew you had a lot of anger. But not that much.”

He dropped his head, staring at where his hands rested on your knees. “It must have been pretty jarring.”

“Yeah,” you admitted. “I think it was just a lot for me. I was out of my comfort zone all night, and then that happened. I’ve never seen so many people with such…disdain for God.”

Noah dug his thumbnail into your thigh softly and bit his lip.

“I know.”

“Why though? Why all the anger? Why the hate? And why do you hang out with those people?”

“I’m one of them,” he said. “I know it might be hard to digest, especially since you’ve been protected from it for so long, but there are a lot of people out there who feel that way. It doesn’t necessarily make them bad people.”

“But that wasn’t just anger. That was hate.” 

“Yeah,” he said, cupping the backs of your thighs. He still wasn’t explaining anything and you were growing frustrated.

“What am I not getting?” you finally asked.

Noah hesitated, fingers drawing patterns over your pants.

“Not everyone has the best upbringing,” he explained, voice tender. “There are people born into shitty situations and they never receive the help or support they need. Life doesn’t provide opportunities to them the way it does for some others, and after a while, the injustice of it all gets to be too much.”

He gave you an opportunity to respond, but you stayed silent, waiting for him to continue.

“My parents were addicts. I think I already mentioned it. And I was born in a town where half the people don’t make it to 18 without an addiction of some sort. Ruffilo and I were lucky to escape, but I’ve seen friends and families torn apart by drugs and crime. I’ve seen pregnant 14-year-old girls turn to prostitution to afford their drug habits. Do you know how hard that is to watch?”

You shook your head.

“If God exists, how can I not be angry with him for allowing shit like that to happen?”

You were at a loss for words, humbled even in your hurt.

“I don’t know what to say,” you whispered.

“You don’t have to say anything,” he said, squeezing your thighs with his hands. “I don’t judge you for how you feel about God. But I do need you to accept that this part of me exists. And it’s not going anywhere. At least, not for a while.”

A couple more tears dripped from your lashes and landed on Noah’s hands. He didn’t flinch away. Instead, he brought a thumb up to your cheekbones and wiped off the remaining wetness that clung to your lashes.

“Look. I don’t know if I believe in God. But if he does exist, and he’s as loving as you say he is, I have to believe he’ll forgive me for how I act in my anger. I think he’ll understand why that anger is necessary for me to feel, and I don’t think he’d punish me for it. If anything, I think he’d allow me to move through it for as long as I need. Or want me to, even, so that I can process it and eventually move on.”

As Noah spoke, something washed over you like a wave. A tension that had been growing inside of you for as long as you could remember began to release, and with it came a brand new understanding.

“Noah,” you whispered. “Have you ever thought about being a pastor?”

Noah’s face broke into a smile and he huffed out a breath of air that fanned out over your face. He smelled like stale beer and smoke, but there was another layer underneath that smelled vaguely sweet.

“That is the weirdest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

“No, I’m serious,” you said with a sniffle, and wiped away another tear. “You know more about God than any church leader I’ve met.”

“I think sometimes it’s hard to see the bigger picture when you’re too close,” he whispered, face now much closer to yours. “I have the benefit of having stepped away.”

You were silent for a moment, digesting the conversation. You didn’t want to talk about it anymore, but you weren’t ready to go back and rejoin the party.

“Can I show you something I’ve been working on?” asked Noah.

“Sure,” you said.

He kicked his feet into the floor and pushed back from where you were sitting, rolling across the floor and over to his desk. He fiddled with a few wires and switches before opening his laptop and pulling up a program.

“I’ve had this melody in my head for a while,” he said, messing with some of the controls before hitting play. “I don’t have any words yet, but I wanted to show you.”

A soft melody began playing through the speakers. Somber. Completely different from any of the songs you’d heard during their set. 

“How long have you been working on this?” you asked as the music played.

“A couple of weeks,” he said, not offering much more explanation.

He wouldn’t meet your eye. Rather, he fidgeted with an auxiliary cable, twisting it around in his hands while simultaneously bouncing his legs up and down softly in time with the drums on the track.

The slow melody held out through the song, but the music grew in intensity, settling into a low-fi R&B vibe.

Seemingly growing restless, Noah spun back around in his chair to face you. He muttered something but you were unable to decipher it over the music.

“What?” you asked.

“I’ve been experimenting with different styles,” he said, a little louder. “Hoping to expand my skills.”

“I like this,” you said. “Definitely more to my tastes.”

He smiled out of the corner of his mouth. “Metal isn’t for everyone.”

“I see the appeal of it,” you said. “I’m sure it resonates with a lot of people, even if I’m not one of them. Your band has a lot of…uh…passionate fans.”

The smile reached both sides of his mouth and he inched closer to you.

“What made you decide to come tonight?” he asked, and you knew it was important for you to be honest in that moment.

“I wanted to see you.”

Like a magnet to metal, Noah gravitated toward you again. There were no false pretenses for why. He wanted to be near you.

Resuming his position from earlier, he sat across from you, legs stretched out on either side of yours. He leaned back in his fancy office chair, and you mirrored him, sinking deeper into the couch.

You watched him watching you, scanning his features for any signals as to what was going on inside his head at that moment. The music played out through the speakers and neither of you made any efforts to fill space or silence. When the song reached its conclusion, it stopped automatically, and it was a while before anyone spoke.

“Does it have a name?” you asked, breaking the silence.

“Not yet,” he said.

“It’s good. I don’t have much music knowledge to say exactly what it is that I like about it, but I can tell I like it. I’d be interested in seeing how it progresses.”

“Good,” he said, arms folded over his torso. He swiveled slightly from left to right, knees knocking into yours as he did.

You looked from your legs back up to his face and he met your gaze. Normally, you’d be the first one to break a silence like this, finding discomfort in the tension, but that night, you waited, wanting to see what Noah would do.

It took a long time for him to crack, but when he finally did, it was to ask you a question.

“Did you do what we talked about?”

You raised an eyebrow, challenging him to be more direct with his question.

“Masturbate?” The word held a slight choked sound, as if there’d been an obstacle in his throat trying to get it out.

You nodded.

“How was it?”

“It…was.”

And that was the truth. You’d made an attempt, but experienced a few difficulties. While you went into it with the intention of showing love to yourself without shame, getting rid of that shame was easier said than done.

For one, you couldn’t imagine yourself agreeing to have sex without feeling guilty, which forced you to jump through several mental hoops involving being restrained and forced in order to feel like you had any sort of plausible deniability you could use should God choose that moment to judge you.

However, in doing that, you felt extremely guilty for engaging in that fantasy, because any real victim of sexual assault would not be thinking about it that way, and should you really be romanticizing that kind of thing? You ended up heavily judging yourself before God even had a chance to judge you.

“I ran into some…difficulties.”

“Mentally or physically?” he asked, left thigh pressed up against your right.

“I think mental.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” he said. “Do you want to talk about it?”

You sighed. “Yeah, kind of. But don’t judge me, okay?”

“If you pictured Isaac, I’m going to have to judge you.”

You shook your head. “I didn’t picture Isaac.”

“Good. Who did you picture?”

“Nobody,” you lied. “Just some nameless, faceless person.”

Up until that point, the conversation had flowed quickly like a game of table tennis, but the lie threw off the rhythm. Noah wasn’t satisfied. He allowed you to get away with it and didn’t press you on it, but now it was his turn for something.

He leaned forward, hands resuming their place on your knees, and looked at you as if he dared you to protest.

You didn’t.

“What difficulties did you have?”

You hesitated. He dug his thumbnail into your thigh.

“I had to imagine myself being forced.”

“Forced?” His hands stilled.

“Like tied up.”

His eyebrow quirked upward. His gaze dropped to where your hands rested in your lap. Sliding his hands up your legs, he encircled your wrists in his long fingers and turned them so they faced upwards, palms open to the sky as if in praise. He kept a tight hold while his eyes flicked briefly back up to meet yours.

Noah was playing a game of chicken. Seeing how far he could push you until you cracked.

“It’s a common fantasy,” he said, voice low and breathy. “Makes sense.”

“You don’t think it’s messed up?”

Noah rubbed his thumbs along the inside of your wrists, stopping every once in a while to apply pressure to different points. He stared at them while he spoke.

“I try not to judge myself for my fantasies. As long as there’s consent, there’s nothing to be ashamed about.”

“You don’t think that it’s disrespectful to people who have been forced in real life?”

He sucked on the inside of his cheek and released it with a clicking sound before taking a deep breath. “Many survivors actually find healing through engaging in that kink.” 

“It’s hard to imagine myself consenting without the guilt creeping in.”

Noah nodded. “Understandable. You’ll give it when you’re ready.”

You closed your eyes and indulged in the pressure he put on your wrists. Your skin ignited under his touch, the same way it had when his fingers had brushed the back of your neck all those weeks ago. He trailed his fingers along your palms and your hands closed reflexively around them.

“Is that something you think you’d be into in real life?” he asked. You could hear the shuffling of movement, but didn’t open your eyes. Your fingers continued to dance together with his.

“Hard to say,” you said. “I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.”

“What’s this?” he asked, finding the silver ring on your left ring finger.

“Promise ring,” you answered.

“Like an engagement ring?” he asked.

“A symbol of a promise to God to stay pure until marriage.” His hands stilled. “We all got one in school.”

Noah pinched the ring between his two fingers.

“Is that something you’re still committed to?”

“I don’t know,” you said. “I don’t know what I believe anymore.”

You opened your eyes to look at Noah, who had vacated his chair and was now kneeling on the floor in front of you.

Holding eye contact, he began to slide the ring up your finger.

“What are you doing?” you asked.

“Just let me try something.” He removed the ring, sticking it in his back pocket for safe keeping. “How does that feel?”

“Light.”

The ring was soldi metal. It weighed heavy on your hand and the absence of it wasn’t unwelcome. This was the first time you’d taken it off since first receiving it. It was both taboo and invigorating.

“When did you make that promise?”

“When I was thirteen.”

“Before you even knew what sexuality was?”

You nodded.

“How cruel,” he said, dropping his hands back to your knees and prying them open so he could wedge his body between them. “Binding yourself to a promise you made before you even knew what you were promising.”

“That’s a little dramatic, don’t you think?” you said, trying not to blush. Noah’s body between your legs was a brand new sensation that left you feeling like your entire lower half was engulfed flames.

His greedy hands migrated to the backs of your knees and he tugged you forward on the couch so your faces were mere inches apart. His breath ghosted across your neck.

Your composure began to crack, breath speeding up, and you hoped he couldn’t tell. Saliva pooled on your tongue. You found yourself unable to look anywhere but his bottom lip, wondering how it would taste. How it would feel between your teeth.

Noah had grown bolder with every move you let him get away with. Any moment, he’d move in for the kill.

“You don’t owe your body to anyone,” he said. “Not even to God.”

“God gave me this body,” you countered.

“Yeah. He did. It’s yours to take care of. Bodies have needs.”

“And you think you’re the one to meet those needs, Noah?”

His fingers clutched hungrily at your thighs. “I could be.”

His tongue poked out to wet his lips. He’d been building towards this conclusion the whole evening, and now it was time for him to make his move. Noah was going to kiss you.

Two things happened simultaneously. Noah tugged you closer, and in his movement, the shiny black horns on the top of his head caught the light and drew your eye to them.

Your gut clenched.

Not yet. 

“I should—,” you began a second too late. Noah’s mouth collided with your jaw, and as soon as it registered in his mind, he jumped back as if he’d been burned. “I should, um,” you cleared your throat, “go check on Ava. She’s never drank before. Wouldn’t want her doing anything she’d regret.”

He sat back on his heels, hand coming up to wipe at something on the back of his neck. “Yeah,” he said. “Of course.” His dejection was evident in his voice and the way he wouldn’t meet your eyes.

“See you Saturday?” you asked, standing up.

“Sure,” he said, blinking up at the ceiling. The defeated slump of his shoulders was what fully broke you. With one last look of apology, you unlocked the door and slipped out. Halfway across the yard, you heard a banging sound from the shed, as if something had been kicked.

You rushed inside to find Ava.

_________________ Taglist: @sundamariis

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[satoru-is-the-way]

HELLO. i see you're one of the only people who writes for jinshi on this site :') could i request a jinshi x fem or gn reader who is like his personal handmaiden, but also close friends with him ?? just an idea 🤡

Anime Master List

Information Page

A/N: OMG YESS JINSHI!! I love this man!! Your wish is my command !! Always request this man lmao. I am willing to do anything haha.

Pairing: Jinshi x gn reader

Prompt: Could I request a jinshi x fem or gn reader who is like his personal handmaiden, but also close friends with him ?? just an idea 🤡. 

Warning: None

You have been friends with Jinish for a few years now. Despite his over-flirtatious behavior, you managed to push it aside not falling for his seductive technique. Perhaps that is a reason why he took an interest in you. Men and Women both would fawn over Jinshi's every word and are easily seduced by his beauty. There is no denying just how perfect Jinshin is, with exotic eyes, hair, and tongue like silver able to seduce just about anyone

He took a liking to you because you denied any advances. The behavior was intriguing so he had to find out more about you. Once the young male set his eyes on you it was not long before you were promoted to his personal maid. What other young men and women would do to have such a job. You did simple tasks for Jinish, cooking, cleaning, preparing his list of duties, and dressed him accordingly. At times the job was difficult with his endless flirtation, but deep inside, you could catch a glimpse of the act Jinish played. All the drunk nights he would embrace you and cry. This friendship was like none other you have ever experienced. He was not the only one to show a soft side. Jinshi became the man you depended on.

Right now you and Jinshi were in the carriage heading back to his estate in the Outer Court. You both attended the garden party and spoke to many officials. It became apparent that Jinshi was frustrated. His purple eyes narrow at you, his right leg bouncing, as his other hand taps his leg. He then glanced away pouting heavily. A profound sigh left your lips knowing by his complexion Jinshi yearned for you to ask why he was bitter at you.

"Master Jinshi, have I done something to upset you?" You asked rather curiously. He shot you a look those violet eyes shimmering with...jealousy?

"As if you do not know the severity of your betrayal." Jinshi put a hand on his forehead dramatically. This only made you furious. He was your best friend yet Jinshi accused you of betrayal?!

"What are you talking about?! I have done nothing that would have been deemed as betraying you!" You meet his voice with equal if not more aggravation.

"Then why do you have Lihaku's hairpin? I bestowed you mine!" Jinshi reached forward and snatched the hairpin of another mans. You sat there starting at your friend who is like a child over a hairpin. "Do you know what this means?!" He asked and snarled at the hairpin. "Do you think him better than I?"

You chuckled which only riled Jinshi up more. "Why on earth- Look I was not going to deny him. I got more than just his. I know what it means. I am not that stupid Jinshi! So before you get jealous and accuse me of stuff, reevaluate our situation. I have been loyal to you since I became your personal maid. You are my best friend. Why would I ever ruin that?"

Jinshi looked at your eyes shimmer which threaten tears. "(Y/n), I am sorry I-" However the young male couldn't get another word out as the carriage came to a stop and you got up leaving. "(Y/n) Stop! Please! Stop walking." Jinshi pleaded following you desperately no matter his begging you would not stop. Jinshi had to restore to desperate measures. "I order you to stop!" He yelled breathing heavily. That's when you stopped being unable to disobey a direct order.

"I did not mean... please forgive me. I just had the idea of losing my best friend. I couldn't bear to think... You with another man...being so close to another man...You are everything to me." Jinshi turns you around. That look he gave you could make anyone fall to their knees. For the first time you couldn't think. Jinshi blush a rose tent. Those beautiful plump lips quiver begging you not to leave. God he knew how to beg. "Forgive me." He whispers.

"You should know my loyalty is with you. No matter the hairpins I collect or who is calling for me. Master Jinshi I am with you. My one and only friend. I couldn't throw away that" You assured him. The next response you did not expect. Jinshi leaned down and pressed his lips to yours. That's when you knew this friendship was so much more.

"I love you." Jinshi whispers.

[tomssexdoll]

HIII!!! can I request an angst where the reader and the band were at a club and Tom is just flirting with this girl ( like touching her and eyeing her ) and the reader gets so mad and punches the girl and it causes a whole argument between Tom and the reader and it ends with smut 😏😏. HAVE AN AMAZING DAY !!

yess lovely!

Makeup sex

PAIRINGS: Tom 2008 x Female reader CONTENT: ANGST + FLUFF + SMUT + FLUFF SYPNOSIS: The band and Y/N decide to go to the club to celebrate their recent album launch, before leaving Y/N and Tom have a massive fight, causing a lot of tension. He has been jealous of her male friends and won't stop causing problems, y/n then catches him flirting with another girl and she is livid, she starts a fight with the girl, Tom gets pissed and on the way home they have another argument, then Tom makes it up to her with makeup sex, reassuring her and talking things out A/N: WHY DO U GUYS LOVE BEING CHEATED ON DAMN, jk ty for the req ily, sorry if this isn't as you expected I felt like it needed to have makeup sex and apologsing, etc. <33 WARNINGS: dom!tom, sub!reader, p in v (missionary), slight teasing

Me, my boyfriend Tom and the rest of his band went to a club to celebrate their recent album launch. We had a massive fight beforehand, he was getting really posessive and wanted me to stop hanging out with my guy friends, I got mad and started to yell at him, causing us to be 20 minutes late to the club.

I was walking in with Tom, his eyes already fucking darting at all the women in short skirts and tight dresses, I grunted and nudged him "look at me not them, I'm your girlfriend not a fuck toy" I let go of his hand and walked off, super pissed.

He scoffed, rolling his eyes and disappearing in the crowd. I turned to Bill, "i'm so sick of his shit, I am so close to breaking it off with him" I sighed, he frowned and put his hand on my thigh "I know, he can be stubborn huh?" I nodded and hugged Bill "i just want him to realise how I feel, it's always about him" I winced, Bill rubbed my back reassuringly "cmon, let's have fun" Bill grabbed my hand and led me to the bar, ordering some shots and cocktails to loosen ourselves up.

Later in the night I went on the dancefloor and saw Tom eyeing up this blonde bitch, twirling her hair with his fingers and tracing her curves teasingly, my breathing hitched and tears pricked my eyes. "Motherfucker.." I grunted, my chest heaving up and down.

I was filled with rage, storming over and pushing him "what the fuck?" he stumbled back, surprised at my presence "uh..i.." "shut up!" I yelled, the girl nudged me slightly "who the fuck are you?" she narrowed her eyes at me "im his girlfriend you stupid slut!", she gasped, looking offended "well, obviously he wants me more", that comment hit me deep, I screamed and punched her in the face, busting her lip and butchering her nose.

"Woah! Hey hey hey!" Tom yelled and grabbed me, preventing me from hitting her any further, dragging me away. I screamed and kicked, trying to be let free, "get the fuck off me Tom! I fucking hate you!" I cried out, he talked with the guys briefly and shoved me in the car, ignoring my cries.

"What the fuck was that? Why did you punch her?", he grabbed my wrist, I scoffed "why? Tom are you deaf or something? You couldn't even stand up for me, you are a fucking coward!" I yelled at him, pulling my hand away and getting out of the car, walking into the street. I wrapped my arms around my torso, a million emotions fluctuating through out my body.

I heard Toms heavy footsteps behind me, "wait! Come back!" he screamed after me, grabbing me by my waist and turning me around to face him, holding me close to him and forcing me to look at him. "Don't fucking walk off" he growled lowly, I rolled my eyes "fuck you Tom, let me go" I tried to pull away but his grip was too strong, "we are going home, don't fight because you know you won't win" he mumbled, shoving me back into the car and locking the doors, speeding off back home.

We argued heavily as we drove home, still arguing when getting into the house. "I'm so sick of this shit! You make me feel crazy for having valid emotions!" I screamed at him, he crossed his arms "you're so fucking dramatic, I didn't do anything with her" I sighed in frustration and held my head, trying to process what he just said.

"You are the shittiest fucking boyfriend ever, you're pathetic!" I yelled at him, throwing the necklace he gave me for our anniversary at him.

"Whatever.." he mumbled, storming into our bedroom and slamming the door, causing the floor to vibrate heavily. I grabbed my phone and called Bill, ranting to him about Tom.

"I think I have to break up with him, I am so sick of his shitty behaviour" I cried, tears streaming down my cheeks, my body trembling from all the anger.

"Y/N, just have a normal talk with him, you guys always argue" he sighed "I try to Bill trust me, but he always twists my words and makes it like it's my fault and then I get mad and yell at him" "I know..he really needs to step up his game, he is going to lose you any day now."

I cried out a little too loudly "I miss when he was a good boyfriend, I don't know what happened."

Tom stepped out of the room upon hearing this, his heart breaking slightly, realising his shitty actions towards her, "fuck.." he mumbled and walked towards her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned around, Toms soft expression meeting mine, I glared and told Bill I had to go. I hung up and Tom came around, sitting beside me and rubbing my thigh softly.

"I'm sorry baby..I didn't realise how much I was affecting you" he frowned, I scoffed "oh really? the crying, multiple nights not sleeping together and constant arguments didn't give you a fucking hint?" I pushed his hand off me "don't fucking touch me, filthy fucking pig" I mumbled, moving away from him.

"Please baby..I'm really sorry" he cried out, trying to pull me closer to him, I sighed and looked back at him "no..it's too late" I got up and walked off, going into our guest room and deciding to sleep there.

I had to figure out what to do, I couldn't be in such a miserable relationship anymore. I grabbed some clothes I had in there from the other times I had to sleep in here, putting them on and slipping into bed. I heard a faint knock at the door "baby..let me in..I'm so sorry" he winced, I yelled back "fuck off! leave me alone!", he sighed and walked back to our bedroom.

I woke up to the bed dipping slightly and familiar, comforting arms wrapping around my waist. "Baby..i'll do anything to make it up to you, I can't lose you, I love you so much" he kissed my neck lovingly, I caved in and turned around, whispering in his ear "turn the lamp on" he obliged and turned it on, illuminating his face, eyes red and puffy from crying so much.

I sighed "you know I love you, but you need to change or else I have no choice..we always fight and then have rough sex which leads to nothing being solved and the arguments to keep on going, I'm sick of it" he nodded "I know..i'll change i swear.." he pushed my head into his chest softly and stroked my hair.

"How about I make it up to you..i'll be gentle baby..appreciate you" he smiled softly, I looked up and nodded, laying back on the bed. Tom slowly crawled towards me, taking my shirt off gently and kissing my lips, down to my neck, then to my chest, both of my arms and down to my stomach, appreciating every little feature I had. "So beautiful liebe.." he wasn't being rough, passionate or lustful, rather gentle and sweet. Little did he know, I loved this side of him.

He pulled my shorts down softly, kissing me as he did it, "I love you baby, i'm not gonna allow us to fight like we do again, I want to love and hold you forever" he smiled softly, tears pricked my eyes and I nodded, "oh baby..don't cry.." he frowned, wiping a tear away as it fell.

I pushed my lips into his again, softly locking our lips into a sweet embrace. He slid his hand into my panties, softly rubbing my clit. I moaned into his mouth and bucked my hips "please...don't tease.." I whined, he chuckled softly and climbed up more, taking his sweatpants off and taking out his cock.

Before he could do anything I put my hand on his chest, "please be gentle.." looking up at him, he nodded and kissed my cheek "I promise baby", with that he slowly pushed his cock into my heat, bottoming himself out.

I held onto him as he started to thrust in slowly, his tip brushing against my g spot graciously, I moaned softly, his hands brushing small hairs away from my face "so so beautiful" "mein schönes mädchen", he whispered sweet nothings into my ear, making me feel loved.

His cock slid in and out of me so perfectly, like his cock was made for my pussy. He started to pick the pace up a little, thrusting faster. I moaned and bit down onto his shoulder "fuck.." he groaned, holding my hips tightly.

I caught his lips in a kiss again, it deepened, becoming more urgent. He looked down at me, his eyes full of love and desire. I felt so connected to him, like I was melting into him.

He started to move faster, thrusting a little bit harder but not too hard, the perfect pace, his hand coming up and squeezing my breast lightly, "you're perfect..so perfect" he whispered in my ear lovingly.

"G'nna cum.." I whimpered softly, a knot forming in my stomach and trailing down to my core. "Cmon baby..cum f'me" he groaned lowly, sweat beads forming on his forehead. The sight in front of me was so hot, Tom thrusting in and out, sweaty and his toned body, it made me so wet oh my god.

I moaned loudly, my thighs shuddering as I came on his cock, his orgasm followed shortly after, shooting his thick cum into my hole, painting my insides white. He collapsed forward, catching his breath, tucking loose hairs behind my ear.

After a while he finally spoke up, "i'm sorry for treating you so badly schatz, I honestly don't even have an excuse for my behaviour, I was just stupid and a big asshole" he sighed, kissing my chin softly, I smiled softly "yeah you were a big asshole, but I'm happy you're apologising, it means a lot" I continued "I hate when we have rough sex after an argument and it solves nothing, I want to be happy again like we were at the start" he nodded and held my hips, flipping us over so that I was on top of his chest, "I know baby, I'll actually communicate with you this time I swear, I will be a better man for you" he caressed me, tracing my curves just like he did with the other girl "did you actually like the girl you were flirting with" I said quietly, still obviously upset by it.

"No way baby, I just did it to piss you off, I don't know why but I was just being an idiot and you know I'd never actually hook up with her, you are my girl forever" he looked deeply in my eyes, I trusted him, usually when he lied he'd always look away but now this man can't break eye contact.

"I love you so much Tom, please keep to your word, I don't want to lose you" I frowned, he kissed me softly and played with my hair "I'll change for you, don't worry, i'll do anything" I smiled brightly and held onto him tightly.

E/N: HEYYYY GUYS

[weirdo09]

No because i do not get why Gwen stans of all people hate Margo😭I mean i KNOW why(misogynoir)but it makes zero sense because Margo wasn't even mean to Gwen when she pulled that leash shit on Miles and makin' her a bitch is crazy because if anything she's TOO nice.Every day i wish biblically accurate angel Gwen(lightskin biracial afrolatina Gwen)was canon so snowbunnies and picks mes wouldn't stan her and then i could be a Gwen kinnie in peace and see more Ghostbyte/Pink Emulator(/sisterly name i gave them).On a lighter note i have some Margo hcs:She's from bronx,a bookworm,has pink as a special interest,is transmasc genderfluid but so femme she dosen't wanna physically transition and uses she/he/they/sparkle/pix/strawb pronouns,she's fat,know as 'the loser girl' at school and her favorite food is loaded chili fries!!

YESS OMG like I was so mad when people would be sitting there making jokes about Gwen killing Margo cause “she was all up on her man” like yo, get a grip, Margo was just being nice and they was havin a lil cute cute moment then Gwen had to come and make it a problem 😭 like biblically accurate gwen would fix so many problems oml but her and margie would be besties <3

I hate Gwen’s stans so much because they literally want gwen to hurt margo for no reason and act like gwen is a better choice for miles with no evidence like just say you hate black love and move enough cause miles and Margo is more interesting to me than romantic Gwen and miles, they just friends besides how you gonna date somebody you hardly know fr? 🤔

but anyway, those hcs are so cute, I personally hc her to be from my state, virginia cause a lotta haitians move here n yeah besides it’s so beautiful hehe ^_^

she games while watching the go home thingy? and I love this one hc I saw of where they was like she makes copies of herself to avoid meetings, it’s priceless! I hc her gender identity to be genderfluid cause yes yes, I honestly really felt so happy when I saw Margo cause of her tooth gap, everybody wanna talk about gwen’s but margo’s is super !!! I love drawing her gap even though it’s been a good minute since I’ve drawn her, but that’s literally my wife y’all !!!! fat Margo makes the world go around because black women do n like yes >:)

[lollytea]

Re pen featherington, I love (and love to hate) just how messy the whole thing is. Everything she does for good intentions is also tarnished by being just as self serving, it’s sooo not black and white. Like yess, Colin should know what he’s getting into marrying Marina, but to air the whole thing out to the world?? When Pen KNOWS that Colin is the type of guy who’d agree to be a dad to a non-bio kid. And the fact that the breaking point for exposing eloise was eloise saying she’ll pose as lady whistledown? Like girl the final straw was not protecting your friend it was your own reputation??

(I just really love the juxtaposition with her and eloise though. That "at least I did something" really did hit home. Oof!!! But at what cost??)

But genuinely I DO NOT KNOW how she can pull off peacefully entering the bridgerton household with all the scandal and heartache she’s put them through, especially with one of them already knowing her secret. And it’s almost the Marina situation for Colin all over again!!! You can’t stand by your decision to out Marina to protect Colin and then expect Eloise to not out your secret to protect him too. Karma is alive and well in the ton!!!

(I'm sorry you sent this a while ago but I forgot to answer it!!)

I admire how realistically flawed both Eloise and Penelope are. Eloise is self centered and arrogant and judgemental and whiny. Penelope is cowardly yet impulsive. She's scathing and cruel and she has too much power and she uses it flippantly to hurt other people. They're both just teenagers who are in WAY over their head. They kinda suck. But they're still so young and so sheltered, despite being already advertised for marriage. Because of the society they've been placed into, they've both donned such nasty armor to protect themselves. Little girls who are expected to perform as adults. It's made them terrible people. But unfortunately, I don't think the narrative itself views it that way, which makes it frustrating. I'm perfectly okay with the show having its main characters do awful things, but I'd appreciate it if said awful things leave an impact.

I think what Penelope did to Marine was probably the vilest thing she has ever done. I don't really consider the Eloise thing half as terrible. At least it was at least somewhat of a "frying pan or fire" situation that Penelope felt like she had to choose for Eloise. Meanwhile, with Marina, Pen should have just minded her own damn business.

Like. Colin would have been FINE. He's a man. A rich man. Getting married to a woman who lied to him would not be the end of his life. At worst, he would have been a bit unsatisfied. Meanwhile if Marina did NOT marry Colin, she could have been on the street. The girl lied and manipulated for the sake of survival. And I frankly don't care if she did. They're really going to create a society where women are held at the mercy of men and NOT expect the women to start getting all gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss about it? Fuck yourself. Maybe the men should just be smarter.

It's debatable if Penelope really understands the complexity of the situation. Or if she even realizes just what could become of Marina if her secret is revealed. After all, she is only a teenage girl at the time. And a sheltered one, at that. However, Lady Whistledown proves that Penelope, for all her sexual unawareness, is exceptionally intelligent and has an extensive knowledge of social norms. So it's like....iunno? Did she fully understand the consequences of her actions? Did she care? Did she regret it? Or was she just a stupid lovesick girl who only cared about a boy who barely looked at her.

I think I'd really just like Penelope to talk about it. Explain what was going through her head at the time. Allow this action of hers to be held with significant weight by the narrative. What pisses me off is that it was just waved off as irrelevent once Marina was written out of the show. Its like they're scared of delving into it because the show loves shying away from what a messy character Penelope is. At the moment, it feels like they're ignoring it in favour of making her a misunderstood tragic angel.

ALSO YEAH it makes me so sad. I saw a few gifsets of the scene where Colin announces their engagement to the family and Violet and Francesca and Hyancinth are so wholesomely delighted and they swarm Penelope with affection. They love her. They love her so deeply. Meanwhile she has caused this family so much pain. And she did so deliberately. What will they think of her once its revealed? What bothers me is that I fear that THEIR feelings are going to be glossed over as unimportant.

But COLIN'S feelings too!!! How the fuck are you gonna do that?? Like even if he wasn't in love with Marina, she was still an innocent girl in a difficult situation that he had quite a lot of affection for. And then he finds out that his current fiancée ruined her life. How is he supposed to react to that? And his sister too!! His sister who he loves deeply. Colin is supposed to be kind. I really can't imagine him feeling anything but disgust. But I KNOW the show is gonna have him way too heart-eyed over Penelope to really care to the extent that he SHOULD. He MIGHT be angry but it probably won't last long. And there definitely won't be a satisfying reason for his anger to subside. Probably just because Penelope looked at him with her big puppy eyes.

AND YKNOW I wouldn't even care if Penelope and Colin were simply acknowledged as shitty people. But they're not. Penelope is a messy morally grey queen but the show is scared of getting into the thick of it. They've made her do too much awful shit and now they're scared to unpack it. Now she's their special little princess <333

UGGHH. YKNOW???

[mysteria157]

Hello my lovely darling 🩷 Bonnie has visited you once again ☺️

Well, that poem from earlier today has really got me thinking. I will try to keep my cloudy thoughts to a minimum but I feel very comfortable yapping with you. You genuinely make me feel so seen and comfortable enough to share some things.

Anyways, I think that a majority of us (black women) have struggled with our identity. Due to white supremacy, Eurocentric beauty standards and etc, we have been so masculinized and treated so much less in society than we deserve. It’s a sad state of affairs and I think we all know how it feels to be ‘othered’ in this world.

But I also think that at some point in life, we get out ‘aha!’ moment when we realize that the color of our skin is nothing to be ashamed of and that we should celebrate it, embrace it and adore it in every way possible.

I just so happened to have had mine in my final year of high school. I studied Dramatic Arts alongside 7 other subjects and I LOVED it. I am theater kid with my whole soul and my teacher once took us the see ‘For Colored Girls’ by Ntozake Shange on stage.

It was SUCH an experience. I honestly recommend every woman of color to read and witness this masterpiece. This actually opened my eyes to black feminism and womanhood and it genuinely changed my whole life. At such a young age, I felt almost liberated from what I was taught about how a stereotypical black woman is supposed to act.

I realized that the stereotypes for not matter nor should we allow them to dim our light. There’s isn’t a ‘fixed’ image of what a black woman is ‘supposed’ to be. You can be loud, you can be introverted, you can be feminine, you can be tomboyish. You can be ANYTHING you want to be. And I find that so profound and magical, especially amongst us.

I’ll leave it there before I write a whole essay lol- I just wanted to share that. Being a black woman is genuinely the most blessed thing that’s ever been given to me since birth and I believe every woman should feel that way. We deserve it. :)

Fun fact: Shange’s name, ‘Ntozake’, originates from the Zulu language. It’s one of the many languages people speak in South Africa and it directly translates to ‘her things’. So basically, she changed her birth name into that as a way to express that she owned and defined the entirety of her soul, essence, spirit, body and mind. Not anyone else or society will possess and mould who she was as a black woman. So profoundly beautiful 🥺

Love you. May your beauty slay all your enemies and I hope you feel happiness always!

-Bonnie 🩷💕

My beautiful Bonnie, I love it when you drop by!!

Yess I loved that poem so much and I did not think it would resonate with me in such a way. But seeing you and other POC mooties who responded to it really puts it into perspective of how close we all are.

I love that you were a theater girlie (and also learning many more things about you) and I will try to find Ntozake Shante’s work. I’m very interested 💕

You’ve made me think about when my ‘aha’ moment was and I truly don’t think I experienced it until I moved away for college. I’m pretty sure I said it in a previous ask but it took me a long time to be comfortable in my own skin as a black woman. And college was a wonderful experience to meet individuals of different identities, orientation, race, culture, etc.

I made a group of friends who just…made me feel seen. Not only as a black woman, but as someone who could discover herself and not feel bad about it. Taking being upset about how people perceive us and turning it into “nah we’re actually fucking amazing lol”

And that small group of diverse individuals are friends I still have now. I treasure them dearly as they do me 💕 even now that we are all in different places in our lives, I have the confidence to embrace my voice.

Love you my sweet, sweet Bonnie and I hope you continue to make others smile as much as you make me 💕😘

[thehighladywrites]

What's set as your phone's lockscreen?

Cheese or chocolate?

Do you have any nicknames?

Last song you listened to?

Have you ever written fanfiction?

Are you on discord?

Do you have any piercings?

 What do you think says the most about a person?

If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?

Are you more of a dog person or a cat person?

Headphones or earbuds?

What's the last thing you said out loud?

What's a weird fact that you know?

Are you a morning person or a night owl?

Favorite place to nap?

Are you a member of the LGBTQIA+ community?

Describe yourself in three words.

Jeans or sweatpants?

What's your go-to Starbucks order?

A color you can't stand?

What's your most prized possession?

Coffee or tea?

Favorite extinct animal?

How long have you been on tumblr?

Desert island item?

Describe your aesthetic.

What's your dream job?

Relationship status?

Describe your favorite outfit.

Is there a song you know all the lyrics to?

What color is your hair?

Do you talk to yourself?

Do you wear makeup?

Best compliment you ever received?

@ your favorite blog.

ohhh anon ngl this was super fun to answer, thanks for sending it to me 💜

I have a light pink basic wallpaper, nothing fancy

Chocolate, always

My friends and siblings call me Ama, amara or mara, i’m also called aisha, which is my middle name💗

Teacher’s pet bc i’m trying to get into the mood when writing professor Eris pt 3💀🤤

Yess, this is the blog I write fanfics on!!

Nope!!

I have my nips pierced, I have three piercings in each ear and a nose stud. Bro when I tell you I almost passed tf out?? I hate needles but like i love to look cunty🤷🏽‍♀️

I honestly don’t know, maybe my kindness? I’m empathetic and very emotional. The thought of making someone sad or making them feel bad makes me feel physically ill.

An oreo, basic but delicious

Cat person for sureeee, i think dogs are cute but i prefer kitties

Headphones for sure, I never leave my house without them. I really recommend them too, they’re called skullcandy hesh evo and have amazing noise cancellation

I said fuck out loud

Did you know that goats have accents? Yeah, a goat from europe won’t understand a goat from asia. My grandmother owns goats and she let me know. At first I thought she was fucking with me but it’s true.

A night owl through and through, I sleep during the days and im awake during the nights

My bed for sure, it’s so comfortable bc i have the softest blankets and a massive comforter. My mattress is super plushy and it feels like sleeping on a cloud.

I think i’m bi with a preference for women

funny as fuck, introverted, anxious

Sweatpants at home, jeans outside

I don’t drink starbucks

obnoxiously bright and strong colors

Neither, I like super sweet drinks, but gun to my head the probs coffee.

Dinosaurs, love those lil fuckers

I’ve had this blog for almost 3 months but I had my old account for about 1 year.

If i could bring one item to a deserted island, i’d bring a sharp knife.

I think hyperfeminine and dark academia. My room is super cute in my opinion and it’s a mix between pink and dark colors. My outfit inspos are rachel green, monica geller and jasmine tookes.

My dream job is being a housewife and i’m so serious. I’m not made to sit in an office or work long hours. I just wanna stay at home, bake, look cute, make a house into a home and just exist. Is it really that hard 😩

I’m happily married to my hot wife @rowaelinsdaughter i love her SO MUCH🫶🏽

My fav outfit that I repeat is this one huge white sweater paired with my black pants, I pair it with black boots and a black long coat with a scarf from acne studios

anything chase atlantic, the nbhd, ldr, melanie martinez, burna boy ik the lyrics to hella songs but by fav is probably show me how by men i trust or art deco by ldr

My hair is black, jet black

yes, I talk to myself all the time…

Yes, I wear make up all the time I love it!!

That I have a nice vibe and energy. And I was once told by my sister that i’m the one she calls first for everything bc i’m the one she wants hearing good news first. She said she trusts me the most and i nearly cried😭😭😭

Here are my fav blogs -> !!!!

[lqfiles]

heh i finally got to reading everythingggg 😈 i have been busy these past few days with my friend’s baby shower (BRO i went shopping for baby clothes and the checkout lady said congrats… I WAS ABOUT TO CRY bc im at the age where my friends are having babiesss (im 19 but still 😔) and it’s been a blessing to be an aunt ✊🏼), and ive been busy with turning in my fafsa bc college in the u.s. is no joke… had to pay 3k last semester and im scared to see how much I have to pay this time 😭

BUT IM HERE

haechan being so desperate and yearning and foaming at the mouth that y/n is ignoring him UGHHH I LOVE IT

LIKE THAT MAN WOULDVE BEGGED ON HIS KNEES omg

and the small comment about mark when he was doing the little notes 😭 WHICH BTW THE NOTES ARE SO CUTE AND CREATIVE like the communication is kinda there (y/n, i understand your hurt ✊🏼)

but you make me fall in love with them even more by each updateee i love that the “enemies” (from the enemies to lovers) is still there like the fact he said “i like my women a bit foul” OOOH HE WANTS HER SO BAD 🤭

hehe thank you for the update tho!! take care of yourself and everyone else too bc the weather is starting to get worseee

- 🫧

(THE TALENT YOU HAVE 🫶🏼)

I FEEL LIKE PEOPLE ARE STARTING TO GET PREGNANT SO YOUNG NOWADAYS i swear i told you about the friend i had that was pregnant too who is 17.. idk i don’t even feel like 19 is the usual age for people to get pregnant but i can only imagine how weird that must feel for you 😭😭 YOULL BE A GREAT AUNT IM SURE <33 and i’m wishing you luck with your college stuff, american education stuff confuses the helll out of me thank god i’m not american

he probably would’ve fr broken down her door if she didn’t respond anymore 😭 and yess he can’t believe he gotta do all that while mark can just stay being MARK, the little sticky notes stuff was something i thought would be cute because haechan has too much pride too witte a whole new letter so lazy sticky notes would have to suffice 🤦🏽‍♀️ it was cute tho.. they’re so cute i love it

i’m not tryna rush it stuff like she dislikes him but is starting to warm up to him slowly while haechan basically doesn’t despise her much anymore but STILL won’t let her walk over him too much yk? HOPE TOURE DOING GOOD AND TAKING CARE TOO LOVE <333

[not-so-unusual]

Coming out hcs? Like I'm sorry all of them are queer so how did they tell each other. I feel like ocean in particular has some internalized stuff goin on

YESS I LOVE ALL MY GAY CHOIR MEMBERS! I'm gonna go in order of who came out first :)

Noel Gruber

Noel didn't really have to 'come out' as much, everyone could already sort of...sense it in him.

There's even a part in the musical when it says his mum knew from a young age and that he was told to 'dial it back' so we can assume everyone always knew.

Ricky Potts

I feel like Ricky would be very open with his sexuality and wouldn't see it as something to be concerned about people knowing, especially his friends.

"It's just who I am"

I cant see anyone being extremely shocked over Ricky coming out, he was already extremely open regarding his romantic self (when people listen to him).

It was probably when he was around 14-15 when he found the term pansexual and was like "...yeah that's me." And subsequently told everyone the next day.

He was quite calm about it.

"Hey I'm pansexual guys"

Penny Lamb

Penny again is quite the blunt person I like to think. If she thinks something is right she will just downright tell you.

Hers came as more of a shock to the choir (mostly because hey forgot she was behind them)

She started looking into it after Ricly came put to everyone and subsequently found out that gay and straight aren't aren't only ones (so she was probably 15).

After a bit of digging and a bit of time for self-reflection, she blurts out an "I'm bisexual" in the middle of choir warm-up.

Mischa Bachinski

Everything changed when same love dropped for mischa. Suddenly homopobia was no more for him.

Ukraine (and most Eastern European countries) tend to be quite homophobic, so he always sort of hid his feelings regarding men when he was home. After coming to Canada however, he was more able to express and understand himself.

He felt sort of scared when he realised he was bisexual and poly , sure he had Penny but they never really talked.

It took a while for him to finally come out to the choir, but they were all there to support him.

Mischa: "I don't think I just like women, men are cool too...maybe I'm just a really big ally?"

Noel: "Mischa no"

Constance Blackwood

I feel like Constance would have realised when she was younger (I headcannon her as pansexual) but due to the environment of Uranium, she was...hesitant.

She quickly realised that she had a crush on Ocean, and that was terrifying. She saw how Ocean would look away awkwardly when Mischa or Noel would talk about their celebrity crushes.

It made her feel...shitty, and really hesitant.

Eventually, however, It just became too much to keep to herself. So when she got home after a long day of school, she just dropped a quick "I'm pansexual" in the choir group chat, turned her phone on silent and went to go and help her parents un the cafe.

When she got home later in the evening, she looked through her phone anxiously only to see the top message from ocean being.

"I'm happy for you, Connie. I love you 💛💖💙"

And she subsequently cried that night (of joy).

Ocean O'connell Rosenberg

Enternalised homophobia goes hard with this one.

She grew up with an open family, however the need to be like other kids made her become very...conservative to be likeable.

She always knew she was a lesbian, but she was sort of scared..of herself?

Literally scared of being gay because she already felt different and isolated, she just wants to be excepted by everyone.

Everyone already knows when she comes out, she sitts them all down, unfolds her peice of paper and sniffles out a

"I've known this for a long time now, and I'm sorry for treating you all the way I did. I'm a lesbian." And brakes down crying

Immediately hugs from everyone and reassurance that it's okay and that they knew she was gay already so they never took it to heart.

An instant "wait what?"

Noel: 'did you think we didn't know? The closet is glass, Ocean. We all waste how you look at Constance anyways😒"

Ocean:"I DONT LIKE CONSTANCE-well, I mean YEAH I do but not like that!-"

[woolieshubris]

okay so before tumblr rudely interrupted me, i was wanting to ask about your thoughts on atarashii gakko's new album, ichijikikoku! since i know you listen to them too :) i remember you saying a bit ago you thought their single 'the edge' was a bit boring, and i would be inclined to agree. but i think the songs on this album are fun! especially 'otome no bigaku' and 'odoru honno 001', which really feel reminiscent of earlier songs of theirs to me <3 'seishun wo kirisaku hado' also has a really fun and interesting feel to me, i really like it. and of course the addition of 'otonablue' on this album is. yes!!! i really like otonablue, i have for a while. it's one of my favourite songs of theirs overall. 'janaindayo' and 'giri giri' i also really love the sound of, tbh the only song on this album im not super a fan of is suki lie. overall i think it's really solid!! i will say it has a very different overall style than their ep snack time, and songs such as nainainai but i don't think that's necessarily a bad thing? i do miss that style a bit though. ANYWAYS i would love to hear your thoughts ^_^

MAN I LOVE IT SO MUCH. They went more for the ballad/rock stuff which I heavily prefer (mostly because they genuinely are good vocalists). Otonablue is genuinely like top 3 songs of theirs and top 10 songs in general for me, so to see an album drop that features it!!! Incredible. I do really like snack time and nainainai, ("free your mind" being a standout for me), but I was worried that it was going to mark a more permanent change in their artistic output. I hope that their new album performs well (especially overseas, because they were promoting snack time in the US at least), so that they realize that it's not a lost cause.

Janaindayo: it feels like an anime opening to me? (Maybe it is one?) I love it though!!!! This shit slaps. I love the speed of it. It feels like I'm running while listening to it

Seishun wo kirisaku hado: THIS SHIT IS SO GOOD.. it feels just like Splatoon music to me. I love vocal filters in songs. This is so fucking good. I don't really know how to put into words how much I like this track.

Giri Giri: interesting. A more typical pop track for sure! Giri Giri means round and round, (like spinning). I do genuinely like how they just let the vocalist go during the bridges. Not my favorite, but I don't hate it.

Suki lie: Also very typical pop track. I don't hate it (I've been listening to a lot of kpop lately so this just feels like a mediocre kpop track to me...) But yeah def a skip. I love the jazz section in the middle but the stuff around it... :(( It's just so mid LOL. maybe I'd like it more if I knew what the lyrics meant but yeah. A bit too repetitive for me

OTONABLUE: OTONABLUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEE !!! (Incredible song love it so much it's my favorite out of the album. I love how it uses 80's synths. If this song doesn't have a music video I hope it gets one for sure)

Otome no bigaku: YESS let her SING!!!! me when women sing with deep voices and go crazy and go wild and just sing !!!!! I love music !!!! I love women!!!!! I wish we had a music video of this I wanna know which girlie is the one who sings

Odoru honno 01: YEASHDHXHHSAHA. it's not my favorite song out of theirs but I genuinely hope this is the direction they take their music! Imo it suits them really well as a band it seems like they want to do more uplifting and fun tracks for people to blast in a car with their friends and this def feels the most in that wheelhouse out of all of the tracks presented.

IMO everything after otonablue slaps!!! Suki lie def feels like they put it on their because their producers made them, but the rest are incredible. I wish they reserved the more traditional pop tracks for another EP but whatever it's still a great album :))) we love atarashii gakko in this house

[theoculus124]

I'm bored- No one asked but I'mma answer a bunch of questions from an ask game

0: Height - I think I'm 5ft 4

1: Age - 16

2: Shoe size - size 5, but mainly depends on the shoe brand

3: Do you smoke? - nope

4: Do you drink? - nope

5: Do you take drugs? - nope

6: Age you get mistaken for - 17/18

7: Have tattoos? - nope

8: Want any tattoos? - YESS, I have a whole pinterest board of tattoo ideas

9: Got any piercings? - Used to but now I don't

10: Want any piercings? - Kinda, but at the same time I'm terrified cause I have a stupidly low pain tolerance

11: Best friend? - I have many :) Honestly we could interact once on tumblr and I would consider u my bsf lol

12: Relationship status - single

13: Biggest turn ons - Idk if this means like relationship, or sexual way? But I'mma just take it as relationship way and say honestly being nice and I'll be happy forever

14: Biggest turn offs - being mean for no reason :/, or telling me to stop being sensitive or making fun of my weight, or making fun of my neurodivergent habits etc

15: Favorite movie - don't really have 1 movie that's my fave I love the greatest showman, I love the MHA movies, Ready Player One, Last Avatar, Marvel movies, Disney movies (Also I just saw there's a Bo Burnham movie so that'll probably be in the list once I watch it)

16: I’ll love you if… you're nice :)

17: Someone you miss - I moved house some years ago but I have some close friends where I grew up so I'll probably see them during the summer

18: Most traumatic experience - I have no clue, I also don't know if anything I've gone through counts as drama or if I'm being dramatic and catastrophising the situation. I'd say probably catholic camp that was awful

19: A fact about your personality - I'm unfiltered so idc what the topic of convo is about u can talk to me about anything and I won't judge you ever <3

20: What I hate most about myself - Being so sensitive. Ik I can't help it but still it still sucks so much, mixed with my constant need for hugs/physical affection is like the worst combo lmfao

21: What I love most about myself - I will be a massive simp for u platonically or romantically <3

22: What I want to be when I get older - I'll probably be an engineer, but I also want to be a therapist part time

23: My relationship with my sibling(s) - isn't horrendous but we don't talk much :/

24: My relationship with my parent(s) - it's been alr rn but it's very up and down, some things they say is really hurtful and it's hard to decide upon me being the overly sensitive one or not

25: My idea of a perfect date - Hugs and food and a gay show, and then staying up until late hours of the night just talking about ourselves etc

26: My biggest pet peeves - people who get mad at u for crying at how they've treated by saying "just chill" "you're overreacting" I hate it so much

27: A description of the girl/boy I like - Wilhem from Young royals. Not a desc but still I don't think I need to expand on that lol

28: A description of the person I dislike the most - bigots, terfs, racists -- those kinds of people

29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend - I don't remember the last time I've lied to a friend

30: What I hate the most about work/school - overwhelming pressure and work

31: What my last text message says - I love you

32: What words upset me the most - hearing the word fat triggers me, I understand it's used as a descriptor and that it's being reclaimed as something neutral not negative but because growing up I got called fat in a negative way I only have negative connotations with it therefore I just get so upset when people say that even if they don't mean it in a bad way (Idk if that makes sense but yh)

33: What words make me feel the best about myself - I love u, beautiful

34: What I find attractive in women - physically Idc at all, like I don't have a type of person I'll be into Idc what ur hair colour, body type, face structure/feature are I'll be into you if you have a great personality

35: What I find attractive in men - physically Idc at all, like I don't have a type of person I'll be into Idc what ur hair colour, body type, face structure/feature are I'll be into you if you have a great personality

36: Where I would like to live - probably in a city, but also I don't want anywhere too loud

37: One of my insecurities - My body image

38: My childhood career choice - I don't remember I think artist

39: My favorite ice cream flavor - anything chocolate <3

40: Who I wish I could be - Nick Nelson or Torii from heartstopper

41: Where I want to be right now - I'd love to see my friends and I'd also love to meet up with tumblr mutuals

42: The last thing I ate - coffee? If that doesn't count ice cream

43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately - I have no clue so many people are attractive

44: A random fact about anything - Boston marriages used to be a thing where two wealthy women would get married so they wouldn't have to share their finances with men :) Got shut down when people realised lesbians exist

There ya go I answered all the questions unprompted :)

[celiastjamesoscar]

Grace, lately my brain has been very nice to me when it comes to dreams. I had another great one. I met Wanda and Natasha at some sort of dance but we all 3 were unhappy to be there. They asked me to run away with them and obviously I agreed. So we got a house boat and sailed to the Netherlands. My mom, Myrinne from Assassins Creed Odyssey a hot milf, didn't want to let me go, so she followed us. We didn't want to be caught because we 3 wanted to stay together, so Wanda blipped everyone away who tried to take me away from them. In the end Wanda, Nat and I lived happily on the boat.

Yes!!! I really need to find me a tattoo artist girlfriend. That would be so cool, tattoos whenever I want! I could even go on vacation with her and make her tattoo you. A girl can dream 😩

Girl, honestly I don't even know how your Letterboxd is so full if you've never seen any movies 😉

YESS GRACE YESS! Women's football, especially the European one is amazing!! Will you be watching the Olympics next year?? You should absolutely get tickets to see your girl! As much as I dislike the English team, aside from Georgia, Leah is a fantastic player! Are you watching a lot of games? And if so, what kind?

who wouldn’t want to run away with Nat and Wanda? It’s a dream (literally) come true!! Going to the Netherlands is goated, you should have told Vivianne Miedema I said hi! Omg Myrinne is so fine 😻 but I honestly love this dream more than the other ones, because in this one people aren’t trying to kill you

I support you getting a tattoo artist girlfriend, especially if I can get a tattoo out of it as well!

my Letterboxd is a criminal offense, I don’t even know how I have so many movies logged either 😭

I will be watching the Olympics!!! Fingers are crossed that the USA doesn’t win the World Cup, I have beef with the entire American team. England won’t be playing in them, so sadly Leah won’t be in them. Home girl tore her ACL in April so she wasn’t even on the team. OMFG IM A BIG GEORGIA STANWAY GIRL!!! I like the England team, but that’s because my best friend loves them. I have been watching a lot of games! I’m a big Arsenal girl, so those are the games I mainly watch. I mainly support Arsenal because they have Leah, but I also love Vivianne Miedema, Beth Mead, and the GOAT Irish player, Katie McCabe. I also watch some of Barcelona’s games because of Lucy Bronze. What teams do you watch?

[yamiyamiart]

It's mostly other people's Art or works that makes me consider certainly ship since for some reason until than I wouldn't even had put those into a room.

But yeah, I was a bit sad that oda actually canon backed away from Kamabakka Sanji, since he even drew him actually enjoying being there after a while. He clearly started to feel more comfortable in a dress and make up and being spoiled and he started to explore himself more. I honestly loved those moments.

Him just being at peace which himself. Accepting who he truly is and or could be.

But yeah I can also see Crocodile's side. He's probably out as gay since his teens or early adult and he doesn't regret it just being himself since he stopped caring what others could think about him. He just wants to enjoy his life and doesn't want to bend himself to please others.

So coming across Sanji maybe even made him a bit sad. Seeing someone refuse to be themselves so much yet he understands that it's the cause of the past circumstances Sanji had went through so he gives him time and space to understand that Crocodile will be a safe person for him around who he can be who he actually is.

Also please tell me about the horny stuff, I love hearing these kind of things.

Yess that's exactly how I love them !! Sanji deserves to be comfy in a dress an heels as often as he smokes ... And I go insane from how good he looks in pink 💕💕

Ok so! Horny time!

I've already written about and sketched so many scenarios with these two! I have a dear friend that also loves this ship and gives me the best inspiration for new sexy hc's

Like it should be a given that if Crocodile is present in a ship there will be a Daddy kink , that man gives off such a giant sugar daddy vibes and the fact that he's actually rich and dresses in only the finest clothes, high expensive taste is a given

Now imagine how highly possesive and dominant he must be in bed, I have this hc that the only man brave enough to confront his mood and top him is Doflamingo (even if it would end up in non-con most of the times considering how they both are) , so he would expect to be pleased, to be pleasured by his sugar baby and here comes Sanji who canonically would do anything that he's asked even if he complains about it the whole time , who's a people pleaser due to his low self esteem caused by his family's abuse , who would make the perfect submissive partner in bed... He's all loud yelling and curses towards any men outside his bedroom but once he's in the privacy of their shared room? It's like a switch gets flipped in his head 💞

This idea I have of him comes from how he acts around women in the canon story, Sanji is all flirting and declaring his love loudly but everytime a girl flirting back or proceeded to touch his hand he turns into a pathetic blushing mess and that's exactly what I love about him , he's all bark not bite

For me that idiot is a sub bottom through and through, even when he sleeps with women they would wrap him around their fingers in a second ♥️

So the idea of him turning into a pillow princess and letting the other take control of the situation, letting him use his body as he pleases it's just so fitting and hot for me . Crocodile would train his body to only feel good when he's the one fuckin him in a way that if he were to sleep with someone else it would never be enough to let him finish, that something would be missing ...

Now for some more explicit hc's, the most important part to remember is that Sanji canonically is extremely flexible and has all his strength in his legs, I like to imagine he has the muscular build of a male ballet dancer , so this man in bed would be so good at riding his partner... Putting those thunder thighs to good use (and there's the fact that Crocodile is a giant next to him so being under the blond will be more comfortable for both when he wants to take it slow and calmly)

During more firey sessions Sanji would get spanked, his hair pulled, bitten all over, ravaged until he's a crying mess, and at the end when he has a satisfied smile and tears are rolling down his face from the ecstasy he would thank Croco for it , blinded by the pleasure :^)

That's how I like my boys, going full animal instinct until they satiate their thirst and then when they are done , back in public people can tell what they just did by their faces alone

Oh and also Crocodile would spoil him rotten gifting him the most expensive lingerie sets besides clothes and perfumes, too bad they always get destroyed when he gets his hands on his boy :3c