#yes yes yes im very happy with how today went. i was so so anxious like when i first went up to her

[caeunot]

hii first of all i love your writing and im so glad i came across your fics 🖤 i was wondering if you could maybe write a johnnie x fem reader, enemies to lovers fic? or something along the lines of johnnie and fem reader always bullying each other a bit only to realise they've been crushing on each other the whole time?

johnnie guilbert x reader

enemies to lovers 18+

➷ you hated his guts, everything about him irritated you and made your skin crawl. you are friends with jake and you absolutely love him to bits so you spending time with him normally equals to you having to be around johnnie. these feelings aren't without reason though, your not the type of girl to hate on others very easily.

it happened a few years back, when your own youtube career recently jumpstarted and you started spending time with other similar youtubers near you. this is how you originally met johnnie, even before jake. you were first invited to a party hosted by some popular la youtuber at the time and you obviously took the invite since you knew this would not only help you make more friends in the industry but to also promote yourself!

you were greeting everyone and taking many pictures as the night went on, fully using this opportunity to the best of your ability. as it hit 12 you decided to look around and scope out the last person you want to introduce yourself to before you head home. you saw a short-ish guy with deep red emo hair swooped to the side with harsh makeup around his eyes and you were immediately intriged. you preferred a more grunge look yourself so seeing someone with such familiar fashion made you feel at ease.

"hey im y/n!" you say, introducing yourself. "do I know you?" he says coldly as he turns to see who was speaking to him. "no but everyone will soon the way my channel is going" you say with some sass so you can counter his rudeness. "you have way too much confidence" he says with a smirk. "so I've been told".

"what's your name?" you ask, "my names johnnie, johnnie guilbert". "well nice to meet you johnnie" you say with a smile. "what do you do for a living? if I can ask", " I make youtube videos and I also make some music on the side!" he says. you two talk for a little longer before you check the time seeing its quite past what you had planned. "hey it was great meeting you! I don't want to stay too long so I think I should get going!"

as you say goodbye and walk away you feel him grab you by your wrist, you turn around. "wait don't go yet, your the most interesting person I've spoken to today and I don't want to go home just yet" you bite your lip, "fine, how about I just walk you to your car then". he rolls his eyes, "is that all? anyways I don't even have a car, I came with uber"

"wait why did you take an uber?", you say confused, "do I really have to say". "yes", " okay, I can't drive.. happy?" you scrunch up your face, you don't feel comfortable letting him go home with an uber this time of night. "I don't mind giving you a lift! then you can talk to me during the ride all you want"

you walked him to your car and he got in on the passenger seat, let me just say that convincing him to let you take him home was harder than you imagined, but you could see in his face he appreciated it.

"why are you doing this again?" he asks as you start driving. "because I'm a nice person and I don't trust ubers". he nods, "I like your piercings" he says, observing your face in the dim lighting. "thanks!" you say as you stick out your tongue, showing your snake eyes. "oh shit I've never seen that in person before, it looks great". you blush slightly, "it was pretty painful and it's hard to upkeep but I don't regret it at all".

he brushes his hands through his hair, probably anxious from the small talk. "this might sound weird but, do you have a girlfriend" you ask. "I don't, why?", "it's because I figured that if u did she would be the one driving u home from a party, so I was just curious". "haven't had one in years", he says leaning back. "really? your really hot so I'd imagine girls would be all over you".

he laughs, "maybe in the past but not anymore, my sense of fashion and my lack of confidence kinda makes getting a girlfriend hard" he says, opening up to you effortlessly. "I think emo guys are hot" you turn and look at him.

"what are you implying?" he says, giving a lewd grin. "that if I had the choice to either have sex with you or not have sex with you that I would". you notice him squirm slightly in his seat. "if you mean that, pull over" he says

you do as he says and you climb into the back seat. you crawl into his lap and find yourself grabbing and pulling on anything you can find as you feel his tounge slip deep into your mouth, tasting the alcohol he had ingested that night. you wish you could recall the rest but you were much drunker than you thought you were and ended up slightly blacking out.

the moral of the story is that you gave him your number, and he never came back after that. not a call, not even a single text. you never ever hooked up with guys, this was your first time. and you hate how knowing a guy for just one hour could make you feel such strong feelings towards him, for johnnies case those feelings were a mix of lust and disgust.

back to current times, you ended up meeting jake a year later and that's when you saw johnnie again for the first time since that night. but instead of apologizing or at least being honest he instead found himself ignoring you. this frustrated you the most, you despise a man who cannot own up to his actions, let alone not even acknowledging them. every time you found yourself around him you felt your blood boil and you just wanted to give him a peice of your mind, but you can't.

you can't since it's been 5 months since and neither of you have said anything at all, 5 months of pure pretend. jake noticed your dislike towards his roommate but he didn't want to get involved in any issues that didn't require him, which you appreciated greatly.

after a lot of convincing, jake did eventually get the both of you to film a video together with him. it was one of those food rating videos and the goal was to order one type of food for everyone, jake said that I will do the drinks, johnnie the main and jake the desert. you were dreading this.

and you have been dreading this day for the past month since jake started bringing it up. you couldn't even handle being in the same room as him for a few minutes let alone a whole video.

"let's plan what we will order now so that we don't have to think to hard tomorrow!' jake says as you sat down on the couch next to him and opposite from johnnie. "I already know what I'm making you guys eat", "let it be actual food and not just chicken nuggets please" jake says jokingly. "knowing johnnie he will probably poison mine" you say with a scoff. a few minutes later jake started getting a call from someone and had to leave, aka leaving you alone with johnnie.

"why would you say that?" johnnie said to you the moment jake left the room. "say what?", "say that I'd poison your food, it's rude". you laugh from the pure nerve this guy has. "don't fuck with me, don't act like your the victim here". "says the one starting unnecessary shit". " I'm not starting anything, you started and I'm just continuing". the tension in the room was cut as jake walks back in, "sorry guys that was my studio, anyways where were we!" he looks between the two of you and johnnie gets up and leaves, saying he's not feeling well.

that evening you sat down in the passengers seat of jakes car, you breathe in and out meditatively to calm your nerves. "okay everything is orderd we just gotta wait for the food!" jake says climbing into his seat of the car and started prepping for the recording. you fiddle with your rings and move around your hair for a solid 12 minutes before johnnie got in the car with the food in hand.

the video started off fine, you didn't laugh at his jokes and he didn't laugh at yours. you two didn't even make eye contact, that was untill it was jakes turn. "okay guys for johnnie I got him a really massive chocolate chip cookie because hes a basic bitch and I got y/n a gummy lunchable because she's never had one" you laugh since the idea for having gummy pizza seems so obscure. "jake that's so wrong you know I love lunchables". jake turns to you as if implying you should give him a piece.

"I rather not" you say softly, but not soft enough to where johnnie couldn't hear you, "it's literally just a lunchable what's your problem". " I never said I had a problem, it's not my fault you don't have manners and can't ask for something yourself". "I literally just said that I love lunchables, stop starting shit were recording".

jake turns around to face the both of you, "what the fuck guys, what's your problem", you look at johnnie, "ask him". " you guys are acting like fucking toddlers either tell me what happened or just sort your issues alone, like now" he says as he gets out of his car, "there's no point in keeping on filming so let's just go inside okay".

you go inside and sit down and you feel as if your in the third grade getting detention from your angry teacher Mr Webber. "so.. what happend, you two have been like this since the moment you met and I don't understand, y/n, johnnie,I love you both so much but I can't handle this bad energy", you stay quiet and so does johnnie. "okay if you guys are going to be like that I'm going to my room, just please sort something out because I promised our fans we were doing a collab". he says walking off into his room.

you bite the inside of your mouth and look around, not able to handle the awkward silence. "johnnie I just have to ask you one question, why?" he makes an upset face, "what do you mean 'why'", " you know what I mean" you say in almost a defeated tone. you stand up and walk towards where he is sitting, "I mean why didn't you text me back, why did you ghost me" he looks away. "don't be a coward please, im tired of our crap". upon hearing this he stands up.

"fine okay, I'm a fucking coward. I was too scared to message you back because I was drunk and you were drunk and I knew for a fact that nothing would happen between us because I mean look at you, your gorgeous and I know if we somehow started something in the future I would feel so guilty that we hooked up the night we met, I've only ever had sex with two people y/n!! that's you and my ex and I feel guilty for it every day because sleeping with random people is not me!!"

your feel as if your in shock, almost frozen in place. you brush your hand through your hair about to say something but nothing comes out. "I never met to hurt you at all I just, I'm stupid I'm fucking st-" you cut him off by putting your lips on his, he doesn't push you away and instead takes his arms and grabs onto you tight while pushing you against the nearest wall. "I sware I'm not usually like this" he says, breaking the kiss,"you just.. do something to me"

'fuck' you mutter as you grab onto his hair as the kiss becomes more and more passionate. he takes his hands off the wall and starts to remove your baby tee, exposing your lacy black bra. as he did this you hear something behind you and look to see jake, his mouth dropped right to the floor. johnnie immediately stood in front of you to cover your exposed skin and when he heard jake walk away he helped you put your shirt back on. "I'm so sorry" he says with the most guilty look on his face.

"shh don't be it's okay!" you say holding his face and giving him a soft kiss, "I definitely overreacted to everything because of how much I liked you, it hurt me so much that someone I felt so strongly about could shove me aside like you did". " I haven't gone a day without regretting what I did" he says. you felt so relieved that this issue between you two was finally sorted out.

"what now?" you ask, indentifying the elephant in the room. "its my turn to say sorry I shouldnt have kissed you like that it was impulsive and careless of me".

"y/n". " yes?", you ask completely confused. "I've never met someone I've wanted more then you in this moment, I want you and all of you" he says walking towards you and holding your waist, "let's not torture each other as we have, please" you smile "I'm all yours".

❣

[monstrous-flower]

hi doll !!! hihi !!!!

i really wanted to send you a misc ask earlier today . but then i saw that you didn't seem to be all too swell .. :[

pleaze remember that you shouldn't feel guilty about whatz happening – you're trying to deal with an awful situation the best way you can . and having to rezort to thiz iz so incredibly heartbreaking . but i think that you're so strong for not succumbing completely to despair and choozing to still fight ; in my eyez . that makez you even more of an admirable person than i already find you :]

but . in case u were curiouz . i wanted to tell u that i went pin shopping today !!! i didn't find any mizuz or mafuz buuutt ......

I FOUND THEZE GOOFZ !!!!!!!! :D

the moment i laid my eyez on anya i thought of you . and subsequently thought "I NEED HER ....... I NEED SIBLING MEMORABILIA ............... !!!" and i bought her with no hesitation

n also peri cuz she remindz me of someone else . n arctic monkeyz cuz i ... uhm ... heart them <33

im also gonna get some commissioned pinz tomorrow from an irl – hope i can send u photoz of them the MOMENT they fall into my grubby lil pawz . becauze i have the feeling you'll like a certain one of them ..... ;]

you're so incredibly wonderful and great !!! just know that i love u soso much !!! and that i alwayz alwayz think about you and how much you mean to me !!!! <3333

Thank you Spooky <3 I am sorry for disabling inboxes earlier.. I had a feeling I'd have an "episode" of emotions and at that time I was lightly anxious of being judged (No one judged! Not surprising I just assumed,) you're very kind to me. I'm always really thankful how much you are here for me even if it's been hard for you BUT OH MY GOD? THE PINS ARE SO COOL? AND YOU THOUGHT ABOUT ME FOR ANYA? I GOT SO HAPPY READING THAT.. Anya is so me.. I love her with my entire heart agh

I WAS SO SHOCKED TO SEE PERIDOT TOO BUT NO THESE ARE SO COOL YOU HAVE THE BEST TASTE EVER DUDE. I'm shaking you.. Once I'm able to spend some money I'm going to buy something that reminds me of you for sure! Not sure what is out there yet but mark my words. BUT YES YES PLEASE SHOW ME WHEN YOU CAN AAAA THAT WOULD MAKE ME SUPER HAPPY ILYILYILLY /P GIVING YOU SOOO MUCH HUGS AND A BOX OF KITTENS OR SOMETHING SWEET LIKE THAT

[think-it-through]

hello tumblr. here i am w another thit in ur face.

today s topic.

my mental instability, diagnoses, and other such beautiful things. but mostly, me, breaking down.

why is it so goddamn hard to get an evaluation when you need one. i need one because i am in a horrible mental state and have been in a similar state mkst of my life and then IT ALSO. heightened. so much in the past year.

one year ago i was quite happy. happiest ive ever been even. i met my partner, i was doing great at school. i had a good relationship with myself.

also one year ago in a week from now. exactly a week since today. is when my grandpa passed away and then it all went to shit!!! my health (physical) my health (mental) my relationship with myself (quaking) my trust in my ability to perform well professionally (currently invisible and yet still somehow present).

in the process of this horrible fall i found out one of my parents has previously been in a mental health hospital and the other one has a diagnosis. HA! who would've thought!!! NOT ME. because god forbid they taught me how they cope with their mental health nono.

the coping is "don't stress" and "crying won't solve anything" and "you'll grow out of it". WELL. GUESS WHAT MUM. i grew INTO IT.

phew. it feels weird to put all this in a positivity blog but it is my blog and i love it and positivity helps cus YES. LOVE PREVAILS. BUT IT DOES NOT NEGATE THE STRUGGLE AND THE BAD. it can still struggle while loved.

and i really. really. want to be better. so bad. sosososososoosososo bad. however! :( however! it has not been working. a self care shower and cutting my nails does nkt help. crying every day does not help. writing from time to time does not help. it helps. but it doesn't take away the pain in my chest, my urge to randomly do very bad things to myself, my fear of the future and my fear of everything. my fear of what people think of me when i am not mentally healthy. my fear ill be stuck in this. my fear ill be just like my father. my fear that I will end up doing all those bad things to myself. my fear that i wjll be a good for nothing living off of my parents mlney. my exhaustion with every daily task. my sleep issues.

but, most of all. nothing takes away the pain in my chest and my confidence that i am not a good person. that i am not capable. that i am abnormal. that i dont do enough. that i dont try enough. that i am a spoiled brat good for nothing fake nice person.

which? wtf what bad person would be so genuinely preoccupied and eaten the fuck up about being a good person. and not in a "performative activism" way but in a. i need to help make the fucked up world better. i need to. i have to. i want to. but am i doing enough. am i. am i? am i????

-

i.. idk! let me try and be grateful. i love my family. i love my partner. i love my friends. i did so much this year that i really thought I would not be able to do and i did it pretty damn good while also trying to not overwork myself. i. did my best. with my best intentions for myself and everyone. so. yeah. isn't that all i can do? what more do i want from myself?

i just. i think so much. so much. bit ironic since this blog is called think-it-through. but its in a sense of thinking it through when u see bad stuff. weighing in the good stuff. or idk. i didnt think that much when i did choose it.

it's going to be okay. not everything is my responsibility. nothing is in my control actually. i am safe for today no matter what decisions i take and what things i can do. sometimes(always) stuff like being sleepy, depressed anxious and procrastinating is NOT a decision. it is not. i need to give myself a break.

i have literally been growing (typo from going. but truly I've been growing) through the worst of my life in the last 12 months, back to back. whatever way i perform. it is understandable. i need to stop aiming so high. (and yet not actually specifically aiming anywhere because im scared of choosing a career choice) but. yeah. i need to stop pressuring myself to aim high in every micromanaged thing.

as someone told me "everything ure scared of, someone is profiting off of." and fuck off. fuck off. to that i say. i will grow and learn to live acting out of love only. and not fear.

i deserve love. everything deserves love. i am kind and good just because i want to be. i am okay and i am going to be ok until im not and then ill figure it out. im not going through something easy but i have support, resources and motivation to get better.

and you do too. good luck. u can do it.

[fraener]

4/15/23

this week has been hard on me. ive been very anxious and even stayed home from school thursday because i was too scared to leave the house until the evening i went with hans and we worked in the garden. its nice to be touching the dirt again. i cant remember if i wrote in here that i joined the experimental music ensemble or not, but were meeting for the second time tonight. it felt good to do something new and be kind of bad at it. i realized in that moment that i really miss trying things and being bad at them. its been strange, i feel really scared in the mornings and then i feel ok by the evening usually, a little scared again when im going to bed. my anxiety and ocd are evolving in new and interesting ways. it sort of feels like when a zit is surfacing or something, everything feels like its coming to a head and everything thats building up pressure under the surface is going to come flowing out and then ill be ok again. im looking at my healing and hurting cycles like breathing....a big inhale of horrible painful scary events and then i hold my breath for a little bit and then a biiiiiig exhale every few years. my lower and middle back have been hurting, and i think im having some dampness/spleen stagnation thats making it overact on my kindeys. ive definitely been stressing out and have had a really hard time getting out of the cycles and into the ifs lobby/core self. but other than my anxiety things have been really good. i fall a little more in love with hans every day which is really nice, and even though we had some conflict recently we both handled it so reasonably that it didnt even make a bump in the road for more than a couple of hours. its still been hard to eat but no so much because im scared of getting sick as its just hard to find fresh food in the grocery store. the produce is really bad right now and so im really looking forward to the coming weeks where ill be able to eat things that arent canned or bread or dairy anymore. i finally got some eggs so im really happy with that. i kinda think i might have to just move back to seattle after all when school ends. the artist trust is really promising for grants and such and i really really really miss home. im going to be penpals with stefan i think, they said yes so im excited about it. i started crying really hard because it felt like an avenue back into feeling like myself and feeling like home. theres this shimmering warm light like from one of those big windows in the animation room that i keep feeling when i feel like i can return....i get the same feeling from that first spring in this apartment. like the world is so big and warm and bright. like theres something right outside of my little stormcloud i cant seem to get out from underneath. i think i want to travel lots and go to grad school somewhere really interesting but i also really want to come home, germs and loud noises and high prices and all. but today i feel ok. today stefan said yes to being penpals with me, today i stumbled across the blog of someone who loves food and loves to cook beautiful things who lives right across the street in the martin in one of the apartments facing the olympian. today im going to call my grandma and karen and go do some more earth prepping and go to the herb store and go to my choir practice. today i might clean or meditate or go for a walk, i might try and make something out of clay, i might write a letter, i might cry some more. today is full of just as much good possibility as bad possibility. actually i think more good than bad. my outlook has been so damaged and changed in so many ways i just want everything to get flipped right side up again. i think if i could see the world a little different like i used to id feel so much better. i dont need to make a beautiful life up, i need to see how good life is right now and lean into it as hard as possible. what max said about life being a competition for who is having the most fun is right. i should be trying to win.

[sacrificesoflaresistance]

VINEGAR DOPPIO X READER

It was a fine Sunday morning, and Doppio was where he commonly found himself; sat in his favorite cafe with a cup of coffee. It was overloaded with sugar and creamer, just how he liked it. But as he sat there, he couldn’t keep his eyes off the new server. Typically Doppio knew most of the workers by name, as he was a very frequent costumer. But, today, he couldn’t seem to recognize the person standing behind the cash register.

They were average height, but there was something about this server that was still eye catching. Maybe it was their hair, maybe their eyes? Maybe it was simply the way they talked, perhaps it was the way they smiled at Doppio after he ordered. No matter what it was- it was intriguing. Intriguing enough that Vinegar found himself coming to this small cafe more often then he ever expected. His wallet cried, but he refused to stop- Whether he pretended to be working, or just bought a small pastry, he found some excuse to see the face he’s come to love.

About two weeks had passed before Doppio finally said something. It was small, but hey; a “So- How’s your week been..?” from a quiet voice was better than nothing at all. He was greeted with that warm, endearing smile he’s grown to adore. There was a small giggle, “My week? Really?”

“Um.. yes! Your week. How- How was it?” he asked again, his voice starting at a fair volume and slowly turned to a whisper.

“Well, my week was just fine, thank you for asking! How was yours, sweet tooth?”

“Sweet tooth..?”

“Oh! Sorry- You always order such sweet drinks… that’s how i remembered your orders in my head- Sorry if that’s.. weird..”

“Oh! No, no it’s sweet! I… I like it.”

They exchanged smiles; Doppio sat back down at the table in the corner of the cafe. He smiled down into his cup- The sun shining down into the light brown liquid. He bit his lip, holding back a small laugh- Though there was nothing truly funny happening, he was simply so happy to have finally gotten to say a few extra words to the server.

The next Sunday when Doppio went in, he ordered just a coffee- But when his name was called, he found his drink plus a muffin and a… note? When he looked over to the server, they just gave him a small, almost mischief-filled smile. Doppio felt his cheeks grow warmer as he went to his seat. He ate the muffin and began reading the small note- It seemed to be ripped out of a larger notebook. He almost choked on his muffin as he began to wrap his mind around what he was reading

“Hey sweet tooth! I’ve noticed you staring at me a lot- Maybe i’m getting the wrong vibe… but you seem cute!

XXX-XXX-XXXX”

When Vinegar looked up to the counter, he didn’t see anyone. He quickly grabbed his drink and left the building; phone in hand. Doppio was practically shaking as he typed the number in. The pink haired male was excited but also anxious- what if he wasn’t what they were expecting? what if he wasn’t good enough? what if his boss called him while he was trying to talk to them??

Too many thoughts, too many fears- But he had a mission.

“Hi! This is Doppio. Or, Sweet tooth? I hope i put the number in right!”

He turned his phone off and began speed-walking, fear taking over his feet. Soon enough he was back outside his apartment building- The young adult’s phone had vibrated minutes ago, but after walking so fast and with so much on his mind, he didn’t notice in the slightest. But back at home, taking his shoes off, he saw the new text.

“OMG hi! yes!! this is the server hehe :P my name is (Y/N)! sorry if this was weird!!”

“Oh no it’s not weird at all!! i didn’t know u saw me staring, im sorry”

“It’s okay! i dont mind, its kind of sweet! If i was uncomfortable i wouldn’t have given u my number. Doppio huh? that’s a cute name!! i like it!”

He couldn’t help but grin. “Thank you! So- besides working.. what do you like to do? you seem interesting!”

Their conversation seemed to last for years, both ends smiling with pure serotonin. The last text had them both ecstatic- an agreement to a date. They’d meet up at the coffee shop and then walk to a nice restaurant nearby. Doppio and (Y/N) were beyond excited- Vinegar was practically radiating joy.

[buckys-little-belle]

hi belle. its my first time making a request from any writer. i'm a big fan of your work especially on the cafe bignsmall. your blog is such a safe place 🥺🥺 if you don't mind, can i request for bucky's little going to the dentist and she is anxious because she felt helpless during the check up. and daddy bucky is trying his best to soothe and comfort her.

thank you 💕

Blue baby

Bucky x Fem!Little!Reader

Warnings : dentists, talks about what goes on in a dentist office but nothing graphic, sad lil reader, soft!daddy!Bucky, reader sheds a few tears (dentists are scary i don’t blame her!)

A/N : I hate the dentist so this fic hits close to home! - I’m trying to see if maybe my paragraphs wont repeat if i don’t put a “read more” section! Sorry if they still repeat!

SFW - please keep all interactions with this blog and fic SFW

Dear anon : It’s a blurb, I’m sorry, i really wanted to make it longer but i wasn’t sure where to add more! I hope you like it my love and i hope this fic is all you wanted and maybe even more. If not please send me another ask and i will gladly rewrite it for you and change anything you want me too! <3 also im so happy you felt comfy making a fic request on this blog! I love you and your vibes my love! <3 - belle

- - - - - -

Bucky drove y/n to the dentist this morning at 10am, a reasonable time for a dentist appointment he thought. Only y/n woke up grumpy and uncomfortable, already dreading her dentist appointment. When she went in she was “big”, something Bucky wasn’t expecting though he was secretly thankful for. Trying to make sure a little y/n could make it through her dentist appointment was not something he wanted to do today.

At 10:30 he heard the car door open, averting his attention from his book towards a very sad looking y/n who currently stood in the doorway of the passenger seat. From her demeanour he could tell she had regressed, her lips more pouty than ever, her eyes puffy and full of tears, honestly he could tell just from the way she stood, her shoulders curled in making her look and feel small.

“Hi baby, how did it go?” Bucky softly spoke, a reassuring smile present.

“Not good at all” she admitted, handing Bucky a small bag that contained a new toothbrush, dental floss and some gum. Peeking inside he found y/n’s staple green toothbrush, the only colour and brand she would use.

“Why’s that baby?” He cooed, helping y/n get comfortable in her seat, passing her a hoodie from the back seat to help warm her up, her arms covered in goosebumps.

“It was cold” she whispered, a tear falling down her cheek. “and my teef hurt now” y/n said, her voice defeated as she smiled big to show Bucky her irritated gums. “Dey made me jus sit there, it was so loud” y/n sobbed, her emotions now taking over her, her mind was no longer logical and only emotions were felt.

Bucky got out of the drivers seat and walked to the passanger side, the door still open, y/n sitting in the seat slumped over a bit. He crouched down, getting on y/n’s level and placing a hand on her leg, rubbing soothing circles along her upper thigh. “You were very brave baby” Bucky said assuringly “you were so good, so so good”

“I still feel icky doe” y/n mumbled, clearly still uncomfortable with the situation and how her mouth felt.

“I know baby, why don’t we go get a special juice?” Y/n perked up at Bucky’s offer, her tear stained face turned towards Bucky’s, a hopeful look plastered on it. Fancy juice meant a drink from Starbucks, something Bucky hardly ever got because of how expensive the drink were.

“Really?” She whispered in disbelief.

“Yes really” Bucky chuckled, his heart swelling as his baby seemed to glow with excitement. Sure he was going to be out $5 by the end of this little ‘reward’ but it would be worth it.

Bucky quickly buckled y/n in, giving her a kiss on the cheek before closing her door and walking towards his. Sitting in his seat and giving her his right arm to cuddle while he drove.

“Thank you daddy” he heard y/n whisper as she placed a small kiss on his forearm, her arms wrapped around his and her face smooshed against it.

“I love you to baby”

[mamamania]

Can I please get a yandere toby one shot?:) Toby has been sneaking off to visit the object of his affections late at night, of course she found it v odd(who wouldn’t? An obviously not mentally stable man knocking on your balcony door at 11pm demanding to get to know you is sketchy-) They soon grow friendly, mostly because she doesn’t know he stalked her for weeks before reaching out. One night Y/N is paying little attention to Toby, smiling at her phone, all distracted, and he doesn’t like it!🍥

YES YE SYESYEYSYEYSY😌🙌 I really enjoyed writing this one so its gonna be longgggg (´ω｀) I spent so long on this oh my fucking God. For anybody else that enjoys this, my masterlist is here if you wanna request anything :)

"What the fuck...?" You mumbled to yourself as you slowly pulled the bed sheets off of you. The tapping at your bedroom window never seemed to stop, if anything it only got more aggressive. It was what, 11pm almost 12am, who or better yet what the fuck is tapping at your window?

Picking up the first thing you can grab as you stalk towards the window. You look at what you had grabbed...a shoe...well, you hoped whatever it is liked the taste of rubber if it proved to be a threat.

Slowly pulling the curtain to your bedroom window back you took a glance outside to see...a man around your age? 'How the fuck did he get up here, its the second floor?' He gave a giddy wave at when he saw you, fingerless gloves showing off his dirty hands. His fingernails caked in dirt and....blood? 'What the fresh fu-'

Not even able to finish your own thought, his muffled voice came through the window. The mouth guard he was wearing not helping in your ability to hear him.

"Hey uh...whoever the fuck you are, um.. I can't here you very well can you take off your mouth thingy?" You asked the stranger whilst tapping your cheek to mimick his mouth guard.

Not going to lie, this guy gave you creepy hobo vibes. He had unkept slightly curly brown hair that had some leaves stuck in it. The areas of skin you could see looked either scarred or covered in what you hoped was mud. Hell, he was even covering his eye's with some sort of steam punk style goggles. Did this guy live in the woods or something?

He made a sound of realization that was barely registered behind the glass. He lifted the goggles so they rested against the top of his head. Honey colored eyes seemed nervous as they stared at you, watching your reaction as he pulled down his mouth guard. A small gidy and semi-nervous smile on his freckled face.

"Hi!! I was.. um, fuCK,.. wondering if we can be friends......?" His eyes were wide and hopeful as he asked you. And God dammit your tired brain can't say no to those puppy eyes....you were definitely going to regret this in the morning. So reluctantly you let this strange person into your bedroom, shutting the window behind him in the process.

"Alright so here's the deal," you started before he could get a word in. "You woke me up and now I'm going back to bed, you can sleep on the floor. And if you try anything I'll shove this fucking shoe down your throat. Got it?" Your (e/c) eyes not wavering from his.

He nods excitedly and sticks his hand out. "I'm T-Toby by the way!" Speaking as if what you had said went in one ear and out the other.

Huffing you stuck your hand out and grabbed his, shaking it as a greeting. "I'm (Y/n), good night I guess..."

Turning away from him, you reached under your bed to grab a spare blanket, tossing it at him. "Um..I need a pillow too..." He piped up. Not even turning around, you toss him one fo the pillows on your bed.

"Night Toby." A demanding tone in your voice.

"Night (Y/n)!"

><><><><><><

A month has passed since then. The first time you and Toby had met, and boy was he something. He had scary mood changes as you'd notice which would make him either really upset, really attached, or do things impulsively. Like the time he bought and entire bag of just the lucky charm marshmallows off Amazon (your account by the way, and you were quite upset with him) and then bought like 4 squishmallows.

But on most days though, like today, you the two of you just hangout like you are now. Your legs on his, which are up on the coffee table. You're just idly scrolling through your phone when you get a text from a good friend. It's just something silly that made you snort. Not even noticing the way Toby's gaze went sour.

He reaches over and quickly snags your phone from your hands. Looking at your screen with an even more disgruntled expression, tossing it across the room.

"HEy-"! You shout in surprise, frustrated at his actions. "DUDE THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?"

You don't get a response at first though, only a scowl.

"I'm the only person you should be happy with." He says lowly. Holding your legs down to keep you from going anywhere. Fear starts to rise at his actions and tone. This wasn't his usual upset tone. It was more malicious and brooding, like it's been there for a while.

Before you realize he's just inches from your face, hot breath aggressively fanning against your cool and anxious skin.

"IM the ONLY person you should be happy with? Did I stutter? No I f-FuckinG didn't."

His tone continued to make goosebumps rise on your skin. Your eyes going wide at his next words. " Now if I gotta break your fucking legs to keep you with me, and drag you kicking, screaming, and crying through the God damn woods so no one else can be with you then I will."

Not even able to form a response at his truly terrifying words, you're left gaping at him like a fish out of water.

This is the Toby you remember meeting..

[levisgirll]

How about one where levi comforts his s/o on her birthday? She maybe doesn't feel as important or not good enough? My bday is actually coming up and im a bit anxious for it and i tend to cry on my birthdays for no reason, but now im feeling as if i have a reason to cry? idk but i just would like some fluff/comfort with levi bc i love him sm. Thank you!

𝐚 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐚𝐲 (𝐋𝐞𝐯𝐢 𝐀𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫)

text: hello anon!! First of all thank you so much for your lovely request I would gladly write this up for you 🥺💕 and second HAPPY EARLY/LATE BIRTHDAY <3 I hope I am not too late and you get to see this post either on your birthday or before :,) I hope you have a lovely day filled with love and laughter cause everyone deserves that on their birthday 🥰 and also I hope this post somehow helps you go through with your bday and makes u feel perhaps less anxious or sad! I kind of felt like this on my last birthday but I went to read some fanfics and they kind of helped me out and made me smile so I hope that is the same case with you when you read what I wrote for you :,) also i made this modern au ahhhh

synopsis: it’s y/n’s birthday! He tries to make this day special as it is since he wants his s/o to realize that! Later he finds out that his s/o feels on this very day not that important and also tears up. As Levi discovers that, he does and says things only on your birthday that really made you surprised and on this day you felt extremely good and special y/n cries happy tears instead <3

comfort fluff, bit angst, a little bit suggestive (?), modern au ♡ —

Today is the day, and not any day but Levi's s/o birthday! He woke up extremely early for this day. He had already planned out what to do coming from a man who is pretty much organized and ahead of things you weren’t shocked to see him getting up quite early.

“Levi..?” Y/N said in such a soft and tired tone, it really warmed his heart. “Love...Happy birthday.” He would go near your ear and whisper that, then gave you a kiss on your forehead. “I’m sorry I didn't mean to wake you up...Go back to sleep.” He would say as he pushed your hair back gently that was laying on your face. You felt his warm fingertips brush against your cheek and you open your eyes slightly to look at your man, Levi that was up and putting his shirt on. You got up a bit reached out and pulled on the his shirt “Wait...don’t leave.”

He turned around quickly and looked at you, ‘Why does she sound uneasy....?’ He would wonder as he came closer to you and kissed on top of your head. “Silly, I’m not leaving or going anywhere. I’ll be in the kitchen so just rest a bit and I’ll wake you up later on, Hm?” Levi said with a smile, after the war and when you both left Paradise to start a life in the outside world, Levi started to smile more, laugh and be even more affectionate towards you and this warmed your heart. He promised you that he would protect you till the last days even if there was no war anymore and also....promised you to show you more love cause he deiced to spend the rest of his life with you, and he was in progress in doing that!

After a couple of hours, you felt a small rub on your shoulders. “Time to wake up birthday girl” He gave you a warm smile and helped you get out of your shared bed. You felt how gentle, and careful he was for you...he truly did cherish you and loved you a lot, you meant the world to Levi.

As you were brushing your teeth, Levi was brushing your hair and when he was done he would put his arms around your waist and kept kissing your neck until you were done and ready.

Your cheeks were red now and you had a shy look on your face. “Ha, Don't be shy with me Love, it’s just us alone.” He would say and softly rub your arms. “Let’s go then?” and you give him a nod and held on his hand.

When you both went downstairs, you gasped and was taken aback by what you saw. A beautiful breakfast that was set up and prepared for the both of you, a sack of pancakes with fruits that was cut by him, your favorite fruit juice, and there was a vase with a bouquet and you could see a card that was hidden in the beautiful flowers he picked out for you and it was written ‘Happy Birthday my Dearest’

“Wow, you did this for...me?” You would say while giving him a sad expression that almost broke his heart. “Who else?” He said with a sarcastic tone and pulled your hand towards the table. You and Levi enjoyed the breakfast and you both had a good morning filled with laughter.

“Sit down, I’m gonna clean the dishes” you nodded and went to sit on the coach. You then started to feel...a bit anxious? Y/N wondered how the rest of the day would go and you started to think if what Levi did was all worth it?

“Love, what's wrong?” Levi was quick to read your vibe, he approached you from behind, and sensed you were feeling perhaps down. “Nothing...”

“Yea I’m not gonna buy that, tell me....What’s wrong?” Y/N stood up slowly and was looking down, her hair was covering her face and that made Levi quickly go in front of her and held on her shoulders. Tears then started to roll down from your cheeks and Levi pulled you to his chest for a hug. “I-I don’t know why I’m tearing up! But I am feeling as if I have a reason to cry and I usually cry on my birthdays Levi...I’m sorry, it’s probably for nothing.”

“Why are you apologizing?” He hugged you tighter and then proceed to stroke your hair. “These feelings are completely normal, why apologize for it? But it’s okay you don’t need to explain why you are crying love.” Levi waited for y/n to calm down as he caressed her hair, and Y/N pulled her face away from his muscular chest and looked up at him. He gave a small smile to her and wiped her tears “Let’s....make those tears not for ‘nothing’ or for ‘no reason’ to be wasted, but instead let me make those tears a reason for you today. A reason that caused you to smile and laugh today.”

Levi was now looking at you in such a loving way, you could feel all his love, emotions, the way he caressed you, hugged you, touched your hair gently and now holding both of your hands, it warmed your heart. He was indeed a man who was really mature, and has a great deal of empathy towards Y/N. Levi understood your feelings cause of the deep love he had for you. “You are important to me, okay? So, let me make those tears....happy tears instead.”

After a while, Levi told you to get dressed up and ready because he was going to take you somewhere. You both left your apartment that you both shared at the moment and walked down the street, while Levi tightly holding your hand and on the other hand he was carrying a brown paper carrier bag which had something in it. “What’s inside?” “A surprise.”

Later did you know, you both reached a huge garden park and you saw a group of people that you recognized. Your friends! “Everyone!”

As soon as Hanji hear you, Hanji came running towards you and hugged you tightly which was then followed by Jean, Mikasa, Armin and the rest all wishing you a happy birthday!

You then spotted Onyankopn, Falco and Gabi preparing the huge picnic filled with a variety of delicious food and then Levi brought out the cake which he designed and baked just for you.

The whole afternoon was spent with your loved one, friends and you all had such a great time, playing some card games, tennis which Jean and Connie that they brought along with them. You were packed with so many gifts too, and Levi was holding on to your waist and hand the whole time and would sneak in some kisses on your cheek when no one would look. Hanji then talked about how your relationship was going and Levi would suddenly talk really highly of you, and pamper about you then he would mention all of the times you meant a lot to him and he cherished.

The sun started to set and everyone was heading to leave, and Levi held on your hand and you both went to see the sunset while sitting on the bench. You found the sunset really beautiful, but to Levi he thought you were more prettier. He held on your hand and then said while focusing on your eyes “You know...When you are not around, I always crave for your touch. You just make me feel good so I always find myself a chance to hold your hand constantly.” Before you could say anything, he gave you a box that was wrapped with a ribbon. “Open it.” Your eyes widen when you saw the gift, it was Rose Gold Watch and it looked rather expensive but extremely charming. He went closer to you and brought your wrist closer and wore the watch for you. “I knew this would suit you.” Levi smiled again and looked at you, tears were now forming on your eyes but this time...it was happy tears and you gave him a big smile that really warmed his heart. “Thank you Levi, I really love you...” He went closer to you and kissed your cheek which washed away the tears that was rolling down. “I love you more....And didn't I say I would make that happy tears today, Hm? But we aren’t done, your birthday did not end yet”

After you both reached home, you both went to the bedroom and you started to change into your comfy silk nightgown, while Levi took of his shirt and was only...wearing his joggers? ‘Wait...He would only do that if he is in the mood’ You thought as you started to blush slightly.

“Lev-” Your words were taken aback when Levi suddenly embraced you and kept his face in your neck while bring his arms around your waist. “Can...I make you feel good tonight? I want to make your birthday memorable....just for today.”  It was more of a whisper when he said it, and you managed to hear it all even though you could feel his heart beating fast.

Your face was now red, you could feel his back muscle tense up and the detail of it as you caressed his back. You nodded, which Levi sensed and acknowledged, but asked again. “I need to hear your answer love.” He was now looking at you and he held on your shoulders, waiting for a response and he would not let you go until you answered. “Yes Love” You said with certainty and looked back at him which he suddenly blushed with you how you responded. Levi did had a tough and strong personality from the outside, but when it came to moments like these he was really soft and usually shy but tonight he wanted to try his best for you, cause you meant the world to him.

He picked you up and you could feel his biceps around you which you held on as he gently laid you on top of the bed, with Levi being on top of you. He leaned in closer and gave you a kiss on your forehead. “Oi! I can be romantic…So why are you giving me that look?” He said with a smirk and that made you laugh. “Hmm...Prove it then.” You challenged him and that made his ego boost up. He proceeded to kiss all over your face which made you giggle as some of them tickled, and then he stopped and reached the edge of your lips which made both of you open your eyes and gazed into each other, both feeling the affection and attraction. “Shit...it drives me crazy when you look at me that way.” He went and kissed your lips, it was soft, slow and very passionate...you could feel all of his love in that kiss as you held on his biceps while his arms where between you for support.

“Where....else do you want me to kiss you?” He moved closer to you as he whispered near your ear, you felt his hot breathe which made you shiver. “A-Anywhere..” You were a blushing mess right now, but you weren't alone your boyfriend Levi’s face was redder than yours.

“O-Okay....Y/N I’m gonna make sure tonight you feel loved tonight, and I want you to focus right now how good you are and how wonderful you are.” As he said that, your face was burning up, ‘what made Levi say this all?’ you wondered.

He came closer to your neck, and was kissing it...you held on to him and hugged his chest, and he was doing it gently. This then left a small hickey on your neck and he was surprised as it was kind of dark.

“I will leave this mark on you so you can remember my love tonight, and know that you are always in my thoughts Y/N” He brought his hand and caressed your cheek which you held on, “And...when its gone, I’m here to give you another one.”

Perhaps, in the days you cry, there would be sad days, but today was a special day which was your birthday, and that not only gave you any tears but instead happy tears which was cause of Levi giving you the warmest/sweetest comfort and love throughout the whole day and especially the whole evening. You really did love Levi Ackerman.

well i hope you enjoyed this! I tried something new and I really see levi doing this for his s/o especially in days where he wants to make them feel loved and he really tries his best to comfort them <3 I hope you loved this anon and you get to see this and also if anyone else did please leave a like or a reblog! ♡

[flowersbby]

Star Struck | Corpse Husband x Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Swearing (If I’m missing any let me know please! :) )

a/n: You’re a model/ streamer in this one! :D I’m thinking about if I should turn this into a series or not? Lmk what you think. I hope you like it <3

It was a nice morning. The sun was shining through the tall windows that showed you a view of your balcony onto your bed, there was a slight breeze so it wasn’t too hot, and you could hear the birds chirping with the occasional honking due to LA traffic. The only reason you woke up was because the sun was shining right in your face. You groaned and put a pillow over your face. I really don’t want to get up right now. Just a few more minutes.. You thought and right as you were about to take the pillow off your face and turn over onto your other side so you could go back to sleep, your phone started ringing. “Ugh!” You groaned once again and reached for your phone that was on your nightstand. You looked at the caller ID and saw that it was your manager, Chris. You accepted the call and put the phone to your ear. “What do you want?” You asked in an annoyed and tired tone. You were definitely NOT a morning person. You hated mornings.

“Oh my God,” He said in a rushed tone, “Have you literally JUST woken up? You have a photoshoot in 2 hours! Makeup and wardrobe are waiting for you down here!” Your eyes widened. You completely forgot about it.

“I-I’ll be right there!” You told him and hung up. You sprang out of bed and almost ran to your walk in closet, your eyes scanning for a top that would match the black leather skirt you wanted to wear for the day. You decided on a black mesh body suit with a black crop top under it. All black today. like your soul. You quickly put on some black heels and brushed your hair, cringing at how the brush tugged on your hair when it reached a knot. You didn’t bother doing your makeup since your makeup team would take it off anyway. You fast walked to the door of your apartment, grabbed your purse off the hook, and opened your door to leave to your photoshoot.

                                                      🖤🖤🖤

After a lot of yelling from Chris for holding the makeup and wardrobe team up, you did your photoshoot and got to go home. When you got home, you took a mirror picture of your outfit and uploaded it to Instagram, putting the caption as “Fashionably Late 🖤💋”. You smiled at the influx of likes right as it posted. You were truly lucky to have your supporters, but you wanted one person in particular to see it. 

Corpse’s POV

I was casually playing Among Us with my friends while they streamed when I felt my phone vibrate slightly on my lap. I began to feel anxious to check my phone since I only have notifications on for one person but I didn’t want to take my eyes off the screen since I was following Jack, who I was sus of. Right when him and I entered electrical, he broke my neck. I felt relieved though since I got to finally look at (y/n)’s post.

My eyes widened when I saw the picture of her outfit. She looked good. Very good. I double tapped on it and immediately went to the comment section out of curiosity of what other people were saying. I looked at all the comments saying how pretty she was and smiled, but the comments made by creepy people made my blood boil. I wish I could just reply to them and say “That’s my girl. Stop.” but we both agreed to keep our relationship out of the public eye and I was truly fine with that. I just wish I could protect her from the creeps out there. 

I wasn’t even paying attention to the game until I suddenly saw “Victory” appear on my screen. “Let’s goooo!” I said into the mic. Everyone else was celebrating as well.

“Hey!” Rae exclaimed, “Let’s get (y/n) in here, she just got home.” My heart skipped a beat and I smiled.

“Yes!” I said a little too excited. Everyone else didn’t notice it though and agreed with me. I quickly texted her out of excitement.

Your POV

After receiving an invite from Rae and booting up your computer, as well as getting everything prepared to stream, you got a text from Corpse. You quickly grabbed your phone to respond back to whatever he said.

My Love 😊💖💖

im so excited to hear your voice

i’ve missed you

<3

You blushed at his messages. You thought about what to text back for a minute until you figured out what to say.

You

I have so much to tell you from today

I missed you so much bb

ft later?

You set your phone back on your desk and loaded up Among Us, joining the discord call while you wait. You were greeted by everyone as you joined.

“(Y/n)! Good noon!” Greeted Rae. You smiled as everyone in the call erupted in hello’s.

“Hey, (y/n).” Corpse said after everyone else had their chance to greet you.

Your stomach did backflips from him just saying your name. “Hi~” You said in a sing songy voice and started streaming. “How are all you guys doing?” You asked as your picked up your water from your desk and started drinking.

“Good now that you’re here..” Corpse muttered. You choked on your water and erupted in coughing, taken aback from what he said. Good thing your were muted.

“Corpse?!” Yelled Poki.

“What did you say?!” Also yelled Felix. The rest were just erupting in Aw’s.

“U-uh,” Corpse stuttered, “I meant that because (y/n) is such a good imposter and I’ve been a little off my game today so I’m hoping we get imposter together so I have some content for a video.” Good cover up.. You thought as your coughing got under control. I think he forgot to mute himself. 

“Yeah!” You exclaimed, “We got this my dude!” You took a glance at chat and saw everyone going crazy. Half of them were typing in all caps asking for someone to clip that moment, and half were shipping you and corpse.

“I can only play one game anyway,” Corpse said, “I have stuff to do.” You frowned at what he said. You haven’t gotten to talk with him all day because of how rushed you were this morning and now you won’t have time to talk with him now because of how different your schedules are. Even though you two loved each other a lot you have had your arguments about this with him. You hate that he lives two hours from you or else this wouldn’t be an issue. You would be over at his house everyday if he lived in LA. You hated long distance.

You had a great time playing with your friends, but when Corpse left you got a little gloomy. He wasn’t answering your texts either. You sighed and changed into his hoody he left in your closet when he visited last and put on some grey pajama shorts. You tied your hair into a messy bun so it wouldn’t get in your way for the rest of the night even though you were just going to watch Netflix in your bed and eat chips. After grabbing your snacks, you walked to your bedroom and opened the glass door to the balcony in your room, turned your LED lights to (f/c), got comfortable in your bed, and turned on your favorite show on your TV.

You were scrolling through Instagram as you heard a knock at your door. A scared feeling washed over you and you paused what you were doing. It was like you were frozen in time and if you made one sudden movement everything would come crashing down. They knocked again. You were scared that some crazed fan found your address to your apartment. Cautiously, you walked to your door and looked through the peek hole. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach and a wide grin appeared on your face as you saw who it was. You quickly unlocked your door and opened it. You wasted no time and grabbed Corpse’s face and kissed him with so much passion you didn’t want to stop. He lifted you up and held your thighs in his hands, walking into your apartment and shutting the door with his foot. “I’ve missed you so much baby.” He breathed as he kept kissing you.

You pulled away from the heated session and Corpse carefully placed you on your feet. You hugged him. “I missed you too.” You said and didn’t want to let go. Corpse placed a kiss on your head as he hugged you and rubbed your back. You realized something and pulled away from the hug. “Where’s your stuff?” Noticing he didn’t have a suitcase.

He looked at you with a blank expression. “Fuuuckk....” He groaned. “I forgot it.” 

You looked at him confused. “How do you forget your stuff. It’s a two hour drive here!” You laughed.

He scratched the back of his neck embarrassed. “I really missed you and I was excited to surprise you,” He explained. “I didn’t want to get here late and have you asleep so I didn’t even think about packing.”

You smiled. “Well, at least you have a ton of clothes here you’ve left.” 

He smirked, looking at his hoodie on your body. “Yeah, I see that.”

You smirked back at him, turned around, and began to walk back into your bedroom, wanting him to follow you. Corpse quickly swept you off your feet and put you over his shoulder, plopping you on the bed as he got on top of you. He looked into your eyes. “I’m tired.” He muttered.

“Let’s cuddle then, baby.” You smile. He smiles back at you tiredly as he moves off you to be the big spoon, pulling you against him by wrapping his arm around your waist. You felt happy in that moment. You finally got to be with the only man who loves you for you physically, instead of two hours away. You both fell asleep, taking in this moment.

[stardew-saloon]

can I request maru seb bonding momence?

Yes !! Seb and Maru’s relationship is honestly really interesting to me because like. Maru mentions Seb a few times but Sebby rarely talks about her. So it gives me the vibe of Maru trying to reach out but Seb not wanting to talk to her.

Here’s some headcanons for them :) it’s mostly just like. How they started to be more okay with each other and eventually become good siblings.

There’s like . Minor sambastian and Maru/Penny but you can probably ignore it smh. But I will be sad that u ignored sambastian just remember that ok

(Also side note im sosososos sorry i haven’t been active at all, I’ve been so busy with school and Life Stuff and it’s so incredibly hard to get stuff out. Im hyperfixating on something else and it’s just ,, really hard to focus on other things yknow? Anyways thank u for being patient ily mwah)

Seb + Maru Bonding

The first time Maru tries to reach out to Seb, she’s immediately shut down. She had a new invention that required a little bit of coding to make the program work properly, so she went to Sebastian, trying to see if he could help.

Sebastian tells her to figure it out herself. The conversation ends after that, with Maru feeling disheartened and upset.

But she’s determined! She doesn’t want to get Robin or Demetrius involved because then they’ll force him to hang out with her and she doesn’t want that. Maru knows how anxious and out of place Sebastian feels whenever Robin and Demetrius try to bring the family together, so she wants to do this on her own.

The next time she reaches out, it’s a rainy day. There’s thunder and lightning. Normally, Maru would stay inside and tinker with her newest project, but Seb was outside today. She saw it as another opportunity.

Maru puts her coat and rain boots on before she meets Sebastian outside, not minding the smell of cigarettes that followed him. When he sees her, he turns away, like he’s trying to pretend she’s not there.

He turns back immediately when she asks him how to catch frogs. Sebastian’s confused, since he doesn’t get why Maru is talking to him. Maru is the perfect kid, and he’s not. It’s like he’s out of her league.

Regardless, Sebastian shows her how. Maru treasures the small smile on his face when they manage to get a frog. Maru suggests naming it Bedelia, which Sebastian agrees to immediately. They spend more time together in the rain, talking about frogs and how to care for them. Sebastian’s done his research, since he wants a terrarium, but the basement is too stuffy. A frog would stink up the place.

So, Maru offers to get a terrarium in her room. She has multiple windows and good ventilation, so it would be no problem. They run back home, frog in hand, both feeling like the little kids again as they beg Robin to keep the frog and get a terrarium. Normally, she would say no, but..

Sebastian hadn’t ever looked so excited. He lost the spark in his eye after his father died, and now, Robin saw it again. She saw the same kid he was a few years ago.

So she agrees to buy a tank from Wally. It’s in the house that very day with little assembly required. They’re both super excited over it, but Seb tries to hide it. He can’t let Maru know that he doesn’t hate being around her! That would be awful!

They bond over Bedelia the Frog. Robin is happy that he’s not cooped up in his room all day, instead choosing to spend time with Bedelia (and Maru, too, but he gets defensive when she suggests that the siblings were hanging out.)

And the coding that Maru needed before? He teaches her how to do it! Sebastian says it’s so that she doesn’t bother him about it again, but Maru thinks otherwise. He looked so happy when he was talking about how to do it, so she asked tons of questions, even if it was something she already understood.

It was the first time they’d ever spent time together without one getting annoyed with the other. After Bedelia came around, they spent more time together. Maru opened up about her feelings towards her best friend Penny, and Sebastian shared that it must run in the family to crush on best friends. She connects the dots and realizes that he’s talking about Sam!

Maru is happy that she’s not so alone anymore. It’s not like her dad can scare away Sebastian like he did all of her other friends. It’s hard for Seb to open up to her after hating her for so long, but Maru is patient with him and tries to understand where he’s coming from.

Eventually, they’re practically best friends! They take care of Bedelia together, and then they care for her entire froggy family! Robin is ecstatic that they’re so close, especially after being distant for their entire childhood.

Umm y’all know I’m bad at ending things so uh . That’s all ! Once again im sorry for the long delay. I’ve been trying to stay consistent but I’m really struggling man :’) im in the middle of a hyperfixation on Danganronpa so it’s a little hard to write for other things. But I hope this is good !!

Bye bye love y’all :) if today is your birthday then happy birthday!!!!

[citronsblog]

Requesting because Tumblr is a bitch and ate my last one tf.

Teruteru, Ryoma, and Mondo proposing and/or getting married to their male s/o.

If this request makes you uncomfortable please do tell me and I can send in something different!!!

×Vex ∆

Notes: YES YES YES A MONDO REQUEST. I NEED TO WRITE FOR HIM MORE 😍 (also your request don’t make me uncomfortable, Although I do prefer writing for gender neutral readers so everyone can read it I enjoy writing for guys so I can feed all of my male audience and it gives me a small challenge)

Warnings: none

Characters: Mondo Owada, Teruteru Hanamura, Ryoma Hoshi

Mondo Owada

Mondo is normally able to be calm around you, that’s one of the reasons he fell for you in the first place, but right now he was stressing.

He is deeply in love with you, his wonderful boyfriend. You guys have been together for awhile now, through the thick and thin Mondo is so grateful for you.

Back to the reason on why he is stressed. He was planing on proposing to you. He was nervous, he didn’t know how his favorite person in the world, you, would react to all of this and frankly that’s what made him scared.

Mondo got snapped out of his thoughts by the lovely sound of your voice,

“Hey Mondo? You have a second?”

“Yeah? What is it hot stuff?”

Swatting at his hand you let out a sigh and continue.

“You said we have a date tonight, I just wanted to know if I should dress up in my tux or if it’s just a casual date?”

Mondo got flustered in the thought of you in a tuxedo. He’s seen you in them before, but oh man he would be lying if he said you never looked so sexy in them.

“Mmmm- huh?! Oh Y-yeah that works.”

Chuckling at your boyfriend you give him a kiss on the forehead and walk off with a ‘thank you.’”

It was later on that evening that you two had been sat down at your table. It was a beautiful view. The restaurant was an average size, you were seated outside with a view of the town.

“Wow I- Mondo I didn’t expect this. Thank you.”

“Tch, it’s nothing really. I’m just glad you like it.”

You two spend that evening eating your delicious meals and by the time the two of you were done the moon was in the sky. There was a soft breeze and the smell of fresh air blew around you.

“Hey, S/o. One more thing before we go…”

You took your hand in his,

“Yes?”

Taking in a deep breath Mondo mustered in all of his courage and started.

“S/o, the love of my life. You have been with me through just about every bad day I’ve had. You’ve never left me no matter what and I’ve always admired and loved that about you. God, what am I doing just rambling on-? S/o, will you give me the honor of being your husband?”

Pulling out a box, Mondo opened it and revealed a black wedding ring lined with silver on the outside and eight small diamonds in the middle.

Mondo, still on one knee, started to get even more nervous as anxiety bubbled in his stomach.

“You Can say no s/o..-“

“Are you kidding me?! You are the one I want to spend my time with Mondo! I love you.”

Mondo slid the ring one your finger and lifted up your chin to give you a sweet and loving kiss.

“I love you too.”

Teruteru Hanamura

Teruteru Hanamura, the most bold, flirtatious, funny, good looking man you’ve ever met, and possibly right now the most anxious.

He seemed to be walking around while mumbling stuff to himself. He seemed anxious about too many things so you decided to step in.

“Hey, Teruteru. Are you doing ok? You look, well um, stressed.”

“Huh?! Ahh- nononono Im perfectly ok love bug don’t worry about me hun!”

Rolling your eyes at him you Pat the spot right next to you on the bed.

“C’mere.”

He couldn’t bring himself to say no, so he sat down next to you and tried to relax. You could still see how tense he was so you started to massage his back slowly.

“Hey.”

“Hi…”

“Teruteru if you need to talk I’m right here. I love you a lot and I hate to see you taking the burden if something alone.”

“Thank you, sweets. I’m so lucky to have a boyfriend like you.”

Smiling to him you nod and stand up.

“Waitwaitwait! Do you mind if we have dinner later? I’ll make it and there’s this one really beautiful spot to eat it at?”

Chuckling you nod at his slightly jumbled words and walk out the door sending him finger guns.

“I’ll be there.”

Teruteru spent the rest of the afternoon preparing your favorite meals, he even made desert for you!

He went ahead and left before you to set up the spot. He put down the softest blanket he owned. He set out each dish and before he even knew it, it was time for you to show up.

You two had an amazing time. Sharing stories, an occasional kiss on the lips, compliments here and there.

The sun was setting and Teruteru knew he had to say it sooner or later. He stood up and gently placed a kiss on your lips and grabbed your hands.

“S/o, do you mind if I speak from the heart?”

“Of course Teru, I always enjoy it when you do!”

He gave you such a gentle look and smiled.

“S/o, you were my very first boyfriend. You never said anything bad about me, in fact you laughed when I made jokes or small comments. That always made my heart race, you’ve always made my heart race. S/o this is a big question and I want you to give me an honest answer,”

Getting down on one knee he made eye contact with you. Smiling to you he continues with the heartfelt speach

“Will you marry me? You make me so happy and I thought maybe we could take everything a step further.”

“Teruteru- Of course! Are you kidding me?! I love you!”

“Sugar- I love you too. Come here.”

Let’s just say you two had a fun and eventful evening.

Ryoma Hoshi

Ryoma was acting strange today. He seemed to be checking his phone a lot, getting some calls, and even acting a bit jittery around you.

You knew something was up but you didn’t want to make him anxious about everything. Deciding to lightly ask him about the topic you head to your shared room.

“Hey, Ryoma?”

“Gh! Oh, hey. Surprised me. Hey do you mind if we go to this restaurant later on? I know it’s last minute and such but- never mind… is it ok if we can?”

Cupping his cheek you give him a grin and a peck on the cheek.

“Of course we can sweetie. I’ll go ahead and get ready?”

“Yeah… I will as well.”

Ryoma checked his phone one more time. His friends were all texting him, wishing him good luck! He was really lucky to find such a supportive group of people to hold in his life. He was especially lucky to have you. You gave him a purpose again, you helped him to keep pushing through the worst days so he can find the better ones. He absolutely loved you.

“Hey ryoma im done-“

You saw him in the mirror looking at himself with a unreadable expression.

“Hey, if your worried about how you look don’t be. Remember I chose you to be my boyfriend for a reason. I really love you ryoma.”

“I wasn’t worried but thank you I think I needed a pep talk before we leave. I’m glad to have such a strong boyfriend.”

You both arrived on a restaurant that was overlooking the town. You could see just about everything, it was wonderful.

Ryoma and you had a very fun evening basking in each other’s company and just talking about what ever comes to mind.

You saw ryoma fiddling with something so you curiously asked about it.

“Hey, what is that?”

The question clearly caught him off guard. He took in a breath and looked at you with a loving look.

“S/o you’ve given me a purpose. You have helped me through my worst and I’ve never felt…. Happier. I wish to be in your life for a long time so S/o, will you be my husband?”

You couldn’t help the grin that seemed to settle on your face. Standing up you lean in to gently kiss him.

“I would love too.”

You two were happy, Ryoma texted all of his friends about the good news.

“Hmm… S/o Hoshi… has a nice ring to it doesn’t it?”

“Heh, it does.”

Bonus! Here are the wedding rings the guys would give to you!

Mondo’s ring for you

Teruteru’s ring for you

Ryoma’s ring for you

[kieraelieson]

Logic Still Needs Comfort

A fic for @im-a-creepy-cookie as a part of @sanderssidesgiftxchange! I did your touch-starved Logan prompt!

Warnings: detailed sensory issues, joking mention of death

Logan disliked being touched.

It had been known for years. They all knew it. Surprise hugs or claps on the shoulder startled him unpleasantly and even made him upset sometimes. Touching his hand to get his attention made him jump and frown. He himself had compared the experience to having a bug or an animal suddenly landing on him.

And so Roman and Patton learned not to touch him aside from the occasional celebratory high-five. Which was fine. Everyone was fine, and happy.

And then came Virgil. And accepting anxiety as a valuable part of Thomas. Which changed things.

••^*^••

“Hey, um… L?”

Logan turned to see Virgil fidgeting but staring at him with an intent look. “Yes?”

“So, um, well you know I told you how Remus is practically a leech, and there wasn’t any getting away from it, but I’m not saying Patton isn’t great! But just Roman is… Roman, and just, but Patton really is great but I kinda don’t want to get turned into a teddy bear, and you’re all calm, and I’m, well, I’m sort of missing the calm and….” Virgil looked down and huffed out an annoyed sigh. “Oh, this is gonna come out awkward any way I say it. Can I sit next to you? I just wanna play on my phone and maybe stick my legs over your lap or something.”

Logan cocked his head to the side just slightly. “You wish to stick your legs over my lap while sitting next to me? That seems like it would involve terrible posture.”

Virgil gave a little breath of a laugh. “Any way I sit involves bad posture.”

“Actually, occasionally when you sit you replicate what is sometimes called the ‘primal squat’ which is reported to be excellent for your posture.”

Virgil gave him a lopsided grin. “Ok, you got me there. Maybe. But anyway, would you mind? It’s totally fine if you don’t want to, I’ll head back to my room.”

Logan considered it carefully. It was true that he did not enjoy touch. But this seemed as if it would be relatively calm, and would not require much, if any, reciprocation on his part. “I do not ‘mind’,” he said, utilizing Virgil’s turn of phrase.

He was currently standing, reading a book he had taken from the bookshelf he was standing in front of, and had not yet decided whether to stay with this book or choose another. He quickly pulled out the other two he’d been considering, and tucked all three books under his arm before seating himself on a couch.

It was a pleasant place, the memory library. Calm and quiet, with almost a heaviness to the air that Logan found enjoyable in a way. It was also rather dim, however, at least in this area, where the memories were older, and Logan found it necessary to summon a side table with a lamp on it so that he would have suitable light for reading.

He’d momentarily forgotten about Virgil until the couch cushion dipped beside him. Virgil pulled off his shoes and glanced at Logan.

“You really don’t mind? I mean, I know it’s kind of invasive to your space. You don’t have to say yes.”

Logan nodded. “I am not opposed.”

Virgil very tentatively put one foot up on Logan’s lap, leaning back against the arm of the couch. Logan felt again that sudden unpleasant ‘something touching me’ feeling, but it passed surprisingly quickly, and by the time Virgil had fully settled himself, laying on his back with his knees up over Logan’s lap and his feet on the other side of Logan, the feeling was gone entirely.

Logan propped his book against Virgil’s knees and began to read.

He was a little surprised, when Patton called for dinner, to find that they had been there for close to two hours, and that the unpleasant feeling had never returned. Instead he was feeling warm, and comfortable, more than he had in quite a while. He attributed this to the couch. And perhaps the warmth was a slight raising of Thomas’s core temperature, due to stress at having Anxiety so close to the old memories. Perhaps they ought to have sat down somewhere a little further away.

Regardless, he was about to comment, as they got up, at how pleasant the experience had been. Except that as soon as they both stood up, he found he was suddenly and extremely unpleasantly cold. This alarmed him, and he left without discussing anything with Virgil, concerned that the warmth and sudden cold was a sign of sickness, perhaps only his own but perhaps a symptom that Thomas was sick as well.

He went straight to the miniature control center he’d set up in one corner of his room, pulling up all of Thomas’s vital signs as well as a recording of where he’d gone that day. But everything was normal.

The cold seemed to be fading somewhat, though it was leaving a concerning ache behind. And it seemed to be concentrated on his thighs and forearms, of all places.

Logan looked through his list of sicknesses, sensible and nonsensical, that he had somehow contracted over his life, and found nothing similar. Still, this must be a sickness of some kind. Most likely a nonsensical one, as he hadn’t noted similar symptoms before. Perhaps he would discover some absurd idiom Thomas had latched onto that was causing him to experience physical repercussions. Something similar to ‘brain freeze’ perhaps.

A soft knock at his door caught Logan’s attention.

“Yes?”

“Logan?” Patton’s voice asked. “Are you alright? Virgil told me what happened. He didn’t realize how much you don’t like being touched, and I think he’d like to apologize, but he’s really worried that you’re upset with him.”

“What—“ Logan had left rather abruptly, and without expressing to Virgil that he’d enjoyed their encounter. It was very possible, with Virgil’s anxiety, that he had misinterpreted Logan’s abrupt departure. “Ah. I see.” He waved a hand to open his door. “I am not in the least upset at Virgil. There seems to be a misunderstanding.”

“Oh, good.” Patton said, concern all over his face. “But you should probably tell Virgil that, and there’s some dinner saved for you yet.”

Logan nodded, the ache in his forearms and thighs rather distracting. “Thank you, Patton.” And then it hit him. If it really were an odd turn of phrase Thomas had attached to, Patton would certainly know it. “Have you happened to notice any interesting phrases recently?”

Patton frowned in confusion, indicating that Logan had changed the subject too rapidly for Patton to keep up. But then he grinned a little. “So today, I saw a baguette in a cage at the zoo!”

And then it was Logan’s turn to be confused for a moment, before he realized. “Ah, I didn’t mean a joke-“

“It was bread in captivity!” Patton smiled brightly, nearly laughing at his own joke.

“Yes, thank you, Patton,” Logan said, allowing the tiniest bit of an amused smile to show.

Even that slight encouragement made Patton beam. “Well, I told Roman that I would watch Disney with him tonight, so I’ll have to go, but don’t forget to talk with Virgil before you eat, and don’t forget to eat either!”

“I won’t forget,” Logan promised, a softer smile showing.

But as soon as Patton left he clapped a hand over his mouth. Why was he so… easily swayed? He prided himself on keeping a straight face, and yet now he’d smiled at Patton’s pun! What was wrong with him?

And now, with Patton leaving the room, it was as if the heat had been sapped. He was again very uncomfortable, aching and cold and he didn’t understand why. Was he perhaps experiencing some strange and extreme form of separation anxiety? It had set in both times as another side had left, though in different ways. But he didn’t feel anxious.

It was all incredibly strange.

But it seemed that Virgil was under a rather upsetting misconception. It could wait. He would speak with Virgil first and then look into this strange sickness further.

Logan crossed the hallway to knock on Virgil’s door.

The door opened almost immediately, Virgil looking as though he’d been waiting on someone to knock, and that Logan had not been the one he’d been expecting, based on the wide eyes and generally startled appearance.

“L, I’m sorry, I wouldn’t have asked if I’d known, I wouldn’t have wanted to make you uncomfortable—“

“Virgil, I assure you, I was perfectly comfortable. I would have expressed discomfort if I needed to.”

Virgil blinked, and the deep black of his eyeshadow faded somewhat. “You aren’t mad?”

“Not at all. I enjoyed the calm company you provided. I left abruptly upon discovering symptoms that indicate possible sickness.”

“Oh.” Virgil was silent a moment, gaze flickering away from Logan as he processed. “Wait, sick? Who’s sick?”

“I may be, though it is odd, and perhaps not a sickness at all.”

“Well, what is it? What’s going on? Are you ok? Is it contagious?”

“I do not know. I am experiencing a strange cold, and aching.”

Virgil’s eyebrows creased in concern. “That doesn’t sound good.”

Logan nodded seriously. “That is why I left, trying to discover what it could be.”

Virgil nodded in an encouraging, ‘go on’ kind of way.

“I haven’t found anything yet, but Patton informed me of the misunderstanding between us and reminded me to eat dinner. I intend to do more research afterwards.”

Virgil nodded. “I could rubber duck for you, if you want. Maybe I could help a bit.”

Logan stared, trying to remember what the phrase was meant to convey before revealing his confusion. He was certain he had it on a flash card somewhere, but he’d left them in his room.

Virgil rather obviously quashed an amused smile. “You tell me what happened, and then we see if we can figure it out together. Repeating the details can help you connect them better sometimes.”

“Ah. Yes. That does seem useful. Thank you.”

Virgil gave him a lopsided grin, pulling up his hood and closing his door behind himself. “So when did you first notice the symptoms?”

Logan explained his symptoms and research to Virgil as they went downstairs and sat down at the table.

“And I still have very little of an idea of why,” Logan admitted. “I believe it possible that it’s another of those idioms that we sometimes experience physically.”

Virgil nodded very slowly. “I actually… might have an idea. I have an experiment I’d like to try, but if I explain it fully it’ll bias you and it probably won’t work.”

“Go ahead,” Logan said, opening the Tupperware container of spaghetti. “What is your experiment?”

Virgil reached one hand across the table. “While you’re eating, give me one hand.”

Logan considered, reaching out to hold Virgil’s hand. “Does this have something to do with checking pulse? You would be able to do that more easily with my wrist than my hand.”

Virgil shook his head. “Just eat, and when you’re done we’ll see how it goes.”

Logan frowned slightly. “Do you believe this has something to do with how recently I’ve eaten? Or that it could be influenced by the focus needed to do something with only one hand?”

Virgil chuckled. “I’ll explain once you’ve eaten.”

Logan was far too curious to wait patiently, and ate quickly, pushing away a not-quite empty container. “What is it?”

“Are you feeling warm again?”

Logan took a moment to assess, and realized that yes. He was feeling warmer. The ache as well was completely gone. “I am. Is it the food?”

Virgil offered a rather sad smile. “Alright, now let go of my hand and tell me what you feel then.”

Logan let go, and almost immediately the cold rushed back. He frowned. “But why? Why do I suddenly seem to have my physical temperature tied to the proximity of you and the other sides?”

His hand ached, and he held Virgil’s again, relieved, but utterly confused when the unpleasant feelings faded.

“I’ve had something like this,” Virgil said. “But not quite the same as yours, based on what Patton was saying. I think you’re probably touch starved.”

Logan considered this silently.

“But I don’t like being touched.”

Virgil gave his hand a slight squeeze. “You don’t seem to mind this.”

Logan nodded, very slowly. “You’re right. I… I don’t mind this at all.”

“I think we should talk to the others,” Virgil suggested.

Logan nodded slowly. “I suppose so.”

••^*^••

“You’re what?!” Patton practically wailed, throwing himself at Logan in a hug.

Immediately Logan felt like he wanted to crawl out his skin. This was miserable. In no way what he wanted. It didn’t feel right at all. It was like a whole hive of insects were buzzing just below his skin.

He pushed Patton off of him, more roughly than he would have intended. “Get off!”

Patton stopped immediately, staring in confusion and hurt.

Logan couldn’t handle it. He was freezing, and his skin was crawling, and his mind seemed filled with static. It was terrible. He just couldn’t.

He barely understood the words directed at him from the other sides as he sank out.

He locked his door and shuddered, hands repeatedly making and releasing fists. He shuddered again, trying to dislodge the crawling feeling. It didn’t leave.

He’d been right, he didn’t like touch. Not at all.

He got into the shower, running the water hot and scrubbing the disgusting feeling away. It helped warm him up as well, which felt way better. He bundled into his bed, pulling the weighted blanket that had been a gift from Virgil over himself.

A while later, finally calm and comfortable, he conjured a note to stick on the door.

I am not upset, but please leave me alone.

••^*^••

Logan spent the next several days figuratively buried in research. He investigated touch starvation as well as touch aversion, and a host of other possible clues to his situation.

He also gradually became more uncomfortable, holed up in his room.

He came to the conclusion that he did, in fact, have a kind of touch starvation, awakened to a roaring hunger by that pleasant afternoon sitting with Virgil.

But he also certainly had an aversion to being touched in certain ways. And he suspected, looking into it more, that surprise was a large factor, as well as the amount of him that was being touched, and perhaps the way in which he was touched.

He was basing this largely on his own reactions to Virgil’s method of touching, as compared to Patton’s or Roman’s, since he highly doubted that it was something inherent in them that he was averse to.

Finally his findings were all put together into one detailed, though as of yet hypothetical, presentation. Armed with this, and a determination not to touch anyone until he’d presented his findings, he opened the door to his room.

As he’d suspected, there was something attached to his door that made a noise as it was opened, and he was soon nearly mobbed with the other sides. They didn’t touch, or come too near, or say anything, but all came very quickly to stare at him, worry in every gaze.

He raised his folder. “I have a presentation. Please gather in the living room.”

It didn’t take long. Not at all.

Logan opened the folder and set it on top of the tv, so that the images could be seen.

“I believe Virgil was correct in suggesting that I have a degree of touch starvation.” He flipped through a few pages, supporting this statement with both facts and personal experiences.

He paused. This was the part that was likely to hurt feelings. Even he knew it, and he wasn’t usually adept at understanding feelings. But it was necessary.

“However, in satisfying this hunger, I will need to be ‘picky’. I have boundaries outlined in this section, and I need to keep them rigidly. This will mean that I will not be open to surprise touch, and likely not to hugs either. I would like to have support from each of you, support in accordance with what I’m capable of handling.”

“Absolutely, Logan,” Patton said. “I’d really like to be able to help you in the right way.”

Both Roman and Virgil nodded very solemnly and enthusiastically.

Logan smiled, more moved by this expression of support than he’d expected to be. “Thank you, Patton. And thank you two as well. I will be very much in need of your assistance.”

He cleared his throat, more in an attempt to gather himself together than any really obstruction. “I’ve laid out a number of methods of touch that I believe would be helpful to me, and arranged them by likelihood of success, and also divided by which I believe each of you would be more inclined to enjoy yourselves.”

••^*^••

Logan was seated on his bed, organizing and updating his flashcards, when there was a knock at the door.

“Come in.”

“Hey,” Roman said, peeking in rather shyly. “Um, can we try one of those things now? I brought something to do.”

Logan considered, a slight curl of worry in his stomach. “Yes. I believe now would be a good time.”

Roman fully entered the room. “So I can sit behind you, and do my thing, and I won’t bother you while you do yours.”

Logan smiled slightly. “That sounds pleasant.”

Roman grinned, a bit of pride evident in his expression. He sat behind Logan on the bed, facing away from him, and leaned back slightly, so that they were each leaning against the other.

For about thirty seconds, Logan was uncomfortable, but gradually, warmth spread out through his body, and his mind was able to return its focus to his flashcards, and soon he found he was quite comfortable.

“Hey, specs, what do you call a little tiny shovel? Like the ones for kids. Or I guess not for kids, or not all the time.”

“That would be called a trowel, though perhaps a more recognizable, less correct term would be a spade.”

“Thanks!”

Logan could hear the smile in Roman’s voice, and smiled himself. This was genuinely pleasant.

Even after he had finished with his flashcards, Logan didn’t move. He just soaked in the wonderful warmth, answering whatever questions Roman had, and occasionally listening as Roman gushed about a particular sentence or paragraph he was especially proud of writing.

••^*^••

Logan walked beside Patton, enjoying the false nature of the imagination. He was familiar with much of the flora and fauna, even a decent portion of those entirely invented within Thomas’s mind. And Patton seemed to enjoy Logan’s rambling as much as Logan enjoyed the rambling.

A hand bumped gently against his, and Logan hesitated a moment, before linking his pinky finger with Patton’s.

Patton’s smile grew even brighter. “And you were saying the seeds of that tree are special? What kind of special are they?”

Logan smiled proudly, launching into an explanation. Patton swung their hands back and forth gently as they walked, and Logan felt something within him fill up. He felt pleasantly full, as if there was a cup inside him that had been long empty, and was now trickling over the rim, full enough to even spill.

••^*^••

Logan and Virgil laid out on the roof, looking up at the night sky. They were side by side, with Logan’s left leg tangled up with Virgil’s right.

It was calm. And warm. And peaceful.

In a reverse of the usual pattern, Virgil was the one telling the myth, this time of people who had lifted up the sky.

Logan felt himself drifting off, more comfortable than he could remember being in a very long time. He was figuratively floating on soft, warm clouds. Drifting into a summer night. He was safe, and content. Comfortable.

••^*^••

“Patton,” Logan said slowly.

“Hmm?”

“I would like to attempt a hug.”

Patton turned all his attention to Logan. “You sure?”

Logan nodded. “Yes. Just— slowly. And gently.”

Patton nodded solemnly, reaching his arms out.

Logan slowly leaned into the embrace, and Patton gently wrapped his arms around him.

And it wasn’t bad.

Logan hugged Patton, squeezing lightly before letting go. “Thank you.”

Patton’s eyes were all shimmery, and his smile wobbled. “You’re welcome, Logan!”

••^*^••

The door burst open dramatically and Roman ran in, flopping over the arm of the couch and letting out an even more dramatic groan. Then he peeked his eyes open, and moved to just as dramatically flop onto Logan’s lap.

“I fought dragons.” He announced, his voice a whisper as if he were inches away from death.

Logan, for once, was hit with a burst of mischievousness, and patted Roman’s face in an intentionally awkward way. “I will be sure to mention it at your funeral. I’m sure you’ve written an extensive ballad, and I’ll force Virgil to sing it in your honor.”

Roman had a sudden grin before resuming his ‘dying of exhaustion and probably wounds’ act. “Make sure you do,” he croaked out. “And have Patton put flowers in my casket.”

“Of course.”

Roman went limp, closing his eyes and sticking his tongue out.

“Patton!” Logan called. “We’re going to have to put on a funeral.”

“A what?!”

••^*^••

Logan leaned against Virgil’s side, his empty cup of coffee set beside him, as the second movie began to wrap up.

“If they start another movie, you can lay in my lap and go to sleep,” Virgil offered quietly.

Logan, who despite the coffee was beginning to nod, hummed an affirmative.

He was woken up a good deal later by a lack of sound, and found that they’d just finished what might have been the third, but could’ve been the fourth or fifth movie of the night. He was laying on a pillow in Virgil’s lap, and his legs were up in Roman’s lap. And judging by Patton’s smile, pictures had been taken.

“We’re finishing up now,��� Patton whispered. “And setting up to sleep out here. Do you want to stay in here or go to your own room?”

Logan yawned. “It will be far better for my posture to go to my own room… but if you were to turn on a sound machine… I would not be opposed to remaining here.”

Soon, something between white noise and rain lulled him back to sleep.

••^*^••

They all found a marked improvement, both in Logan’s mood and even in Thomas’s clarity of mind, as they continued experimenting with touch.

It was discovered that Roman, while not starved, was also touch-hungry, and was practically a giant dog in that he would accept any and all kinds of petting.

And as Logan regulated, he found he was even more ready to give touch than to receive it. Roman flopping onto him after ‘terrible and glorious battles’ became a regular occurrence, often ending with Roman falling asleep, Logan gently scritching at his scalp.

Walks with Patton became something they both greatly enjoyed and looked forward to. Sometimes they could only link pinkies, sometimes holding hands, sometimes even walking arm in arm.

And Virgil was always ready to do something of his own near Logan, a limb draped over him or pressed up against him.

Logan found himself repeatedly thinking back to that one afternoon in the memory library, incredibly grateful that Virgil had asked, and that he had said yes. He could see so much in his life that was better now.

And he was really, truly happy.

[worldoffanfiction2021]

Eternal Love of Dream - Chapter Next 6

(Image Source: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/601582462717336907/)

Xiaobai's body and spirit had finally recovered fully.  Her wounds had healed and her cultivation had come back. She had started practicing martial arts again and was very happy about it.

With Dijun himself  helping her, she didn’t need to worry. He would  push her just out of her comfort zone, every few days. Only when she got comfortable there he would challenge her further. He was a very good teacher. She was an equally dedicated  student.

Gungun would tag along with them all the time. He loved to watch his mom and dad practice. Dijun had made him a smaller wooden sword and every day his mom or dad would spend some time with him playing with it. He didn’t realize that while he thought they were playing, they were also teaching him many important skills. He was a happy and cheerful child.

Fengjiu had been making great progress on handling her duties as a monarch too. She set aside some time each day to go over various reports and work through them. Her father was delighted to see that for sure. She had also made several decisions to appoint capable citizens of Quinqui to take on more responsibilities around the kingdom. People were appreciative of her efforts. Overall things were settling well.

Dijun undertook several small trips back and forth to Sky Kingdom to handle his work. He was training Ye Quingti on different aspects of administration at Tai Chen palace. Fengjiu and Dijun had found that each time they would leave each other, they would be so anxious to meet again.

Tonight was just one of the nights when he had returned from Sky Kingdom. He had waited (im)patiently for Xiaobai to finish her day, to put Gungun to bed and to get to their room. As soon as she entered, he closed the door behind her and took her in his arms, kissing her all over hungrily. After her initial shyness, she kissed him right back. "Missed me?", he whispered in her ear, teasing her. She buried her face on his chest shyly and nodded. Very pleased with that, he let out a husky laugh, scooped her up in arms and took her to bed.

When Dijun woke up hours later, he realized they had not changed or tidied up the room or closed the windows. He chuckled softly. In the last several millions of years, Dijun had never felt this way about anyone else. He realized he was a completely different man now than before. This soft, frail little woman had melted his heart of rock. For someone who had been devoid of desires for centuries, she had become the one desire he could not give up on.

He waved his hand to fix the room and close windows. Then he pulled the quilt up on both of them and scooted closer to Fengjiu. Spooning her close to him, he closed his eyes.

——

As usual, Fengjiu woke up at the first light of the day. She turned to face Dijun who was still sleeping soundly. She reveled in the moment, shyly admiring her handsome husband. Out of habit she started playing with his silver hair. That woke him up. “You are awake? It’s still early, don’t get up yet”, he murmured groggily and pulled her close. She could hear his steady, rhythmic heartbeat. That was the best sound in the entire universe for her. She closed her eyes and slept some more.

After a while Dijun got up and got ready. He sat at his desk half reading, half watching Xiaobai sleep. Her delicate features looked exquisite while sleeping. He recalled how warm and soft her skin had felt under him last night and was very much tempted to get back in bed with her. "Stop. Let her rest, Dong Hua. She has been working hard lately.", he reprimanded himself.

When Xiaobai finally woke up, the sun was up already.  When she stirred and opened her eyes, Dijun smiled at her. “Good morning, honey.” He teased. She made a face. She was still not comfortable hearing him say that endearment in broad daylight.

“Get ready, honey. I will fetch us breakfast and we can eat together. Would you like that? Honey?”, seeing her face, he continued to torment her. Frowning, she got up and came to him. She put her hand on his mouth to make him stop calling her that. He was only too glad. He grabbed on to her hand and started kissing each finger slowly, unhurriedly. She felt like her knees were about to melt.

“Mom, you are up! Why did you sleep for so long today?”, Gungun ran in bursting with questions. She snatched her hand back blushing all over. “I… Me.. We…”, Fengjiu fumbled for words. Meanwhile Dijun composed himself quickly, turned around and hugged Gungun. “I think you got too tired last night, didn’t you? Honey?” He asked her with a naughty smirk.

“Last night? But you put me to bed on time, why did you get tired? What did you do after?”, asked a confused Gungun. She turned a shade more pink at the mention of last night and was rendered speechless. First of all her brain had not fully woken up, then Dijun had turned it almost to a mush with his lingering finger-kisses and now this. All she could say was, “I don’t know how…”

Dijun, who was taking pleasure in her discomfort, finally decided to relent and came to her rescue. “Your mom has been working hard these past few days. She must have been tired and not realized it. Let’s go bring our breakfast here. Mom can get ready by then and we can all eat together.”, he said extending his hand to the boy. Together they went out.

“Phew”, she shook her head and sighed, watching their retreating figures.

----

While they were eating and chit chatting, Dijun started a topic with all seriousness. “Xiaobai, I think we have lived in Quinqui long enough. Your parents have been kind enough to have us. Do you think we should go somewhere else for the next few months? We can go to Tai Chen palace or Bihai Cangling. I can arrange for messengers to deliver important messages about your work to you every day. What do you think?”

Xiaobai nodded and agreed, “I have been thinking about the same thing. Give me 4 weeks to arrange my current work and make sure there are things in place for Quinqui while we are away. After 4 weeks, let’s go to Bihai Cangling. Gungun hasn’t been there at all. He should know that’s his home too.”

“Sounds like a good plan, hon....”, Dijun smiled and stopped halfway through 'honey' as he saw her expression. Gungun looked up, utterly confused. But both his parents were serving him food and they looked very engrossed in eating.

———

[headheartbellarke]

LIGHT A FIRE IN MY EYES | Owen Patrick Joyner

PAIRING(S): Charlie Gillespie’s sister!Reader x Owen Patrick Joyner

WARNING(S): fluff, angst

WORDS: 3.4k

SUMMARY: where Y/N is charlie gillespie’s sister, and while living with him and owen, unexpected feelings rise up. (im so bad at these)

READER’S POV

    A rhythmic knock on my bedroom door breaks me out of my trance. I push my glasses further up my nose and close my physics textbook, dropping my pencil between the pages to bookmark it. Pushing myself off the chair, I stretch my arms above my head – I’ve been sitting at my desk for about five hours now, trying to revise everything for my exam tomorrow. I walk over to my door, and unlock it, and I’m greeted by my brother, Charlie. He takes in my appearance and frowns.

     “I thought you were still sleeping. When did you get up?”

     “Uhh…” I trail off, looking behind me at the clock mounted on the wall opposite to me. 10:30 AM.  “About 5, yeah.”

    I turn back and notice my brother widening his eyes. “Are you okay, little one?”

    I’m not a morning person, under no circumstances ever. Growing up, I’ve always been the last person to wake up – Charlie being the first. So, I guess it’s awfully unusual for him to hear this.

     “This is college, honey. You wouldn’t know.” I shrug at him and he grins. I’ve always hated the fact that he got a free pass from college, since he’s an actor.

    That is also the reason why he’s here. We grew up in Canada – Charlie, me, my two other older brothers and my twin sister Meghan. Growing up, Charlie, Meghan and I were inseparable – since we’re closer in age – Charlie’s only two years older than Meghan and me. But I had to leave home for college – I got into Caltech, and that was not an opportunity I was about to give up, even though Charlie protested so many times that I’m apparently the baby of the house and I shouldn’t go to another country alone.

    Now, he’s living with me – he is shooting for his show, Julie and The Phantoms (proud sister, here), and they have a couple of scenes and some recording to do in LA, so he’s staying in my apartment for a week, along with his friend, co-star and roommate back in Vancouver, Owen. Previously, they lived with me for more than a month when they had to go through musical bootcamp or something for the sake of the show. (So proud.)

    That was also when I’d developed a massive crush on Owen.

    Charlie was living with me for a good two weeks when, one day, he took me out to meet the rest of the cast. (Who were all lovely, by the way.) On the drive there, he told me that Owen had been living in a hotel since he’s originally from Oklahoma, and that Charlie’s thinking of asking him to come live with us, if I was okay with that. Of course, I had said yes. I had ample space in my duplex apartment and living alone is boring. So, Charlie introduced me to Owen and we immediately hit it off. Of course, I thought that he was incredibly attractive when we met. But I meet a lot of attractive people at university.

    Then, we started living together, and I realized how amazing Owen actually is. He’s an absolute dork – but he’s also funny, very kind, thoughtful, compassionate, altruistic and so, so nice. Both of us have a lot in common, and there’s always been this unsaid, unacknowledged chemistry between us that a lot of the other cast members had picked up on. (Not my brother, though. He would have killed Owen.) We had so much fun when we were together – he turned everything into an adventure. The best part was that I got to be myself, completely, whenever I was around him. I got to talk about whatever I wanted with him – he never, ever judged me.

    Before they went to Vancouver when production for the show began, we had a last night out with the rest of the cast and a bunch of family members – except the kids. We went to this bar near my college. I was so, so drunk and then I suddenly started feeling queasy and Owen offered to take me home since Charlie was in the same position. There was so much traffic and Owen and I kept singing whatever song was on the radio to pass the time – LA traffic – when we were both leaning across our seats and we started kissing. I remember feeling like I would burst from the happiness and the softness, the affection, the admiration that he had in his eyes when he looked at me.

    Of course, I fell asleep pretty soon after the traffic dissipated and woke up next morning to find him packing for his trip. That was when I’d realized that no matter how much I liked him, we could never be together. First of all, long distance relationships almost never work out, and secondly, he’s my brother’s best friend. That was why I chose to just give him a quick hug goodbye and head to college – without even bothering to drop them off at the airport, or even talking to him.

    He texted and called a couple of times after that, too. But I never responded, never even opened any of his texts – because I knew that once I do that, I would definitely call him. That went on for a week, and the only time we spoke was when he’d texted me from Savannah’s phone: why are you ignoring me? I texted back all the reasons why we couldn’t ever be together, and I didn’t hear from him for another week, until Charlie called me the day before yesterday, telling me that they have a couple of scenes to do in LA, along with some recording stuff, and they’ll stay with me for a few days. I had to approve, or else Charlie might figure out everything.

    They arrived yesterday, and I think that I’ve done a pretty good job of ignoring him so far.

    Charlie’s voice breaks me out of my train of thoughts. “You have exams or what?”

    I nod. “Applied physics, tomorrow. Are you going out?” I ask, pointing at his dark blue jeans.

     “Madi and I are writing this song together. You’ll love it.”

    I smile at him. “If I’m not the first one to hear it –”

    He hums, a chuckle escaping him. I lean against the doorframe, as he continues, “Owen just woke up. He doesn’t start his scenes until tomorrow, so I told him to take care of you today, while I’m away.”

    I ignore the way my heart skips a beat at the mere mention of his name and flatten my lips. “I’m 19, Charlie, I can –”

     “Take care of yourself, blah blah blah. I don’t care.”

    I roll my eyes, and playfully shove him forward. He stumbles a few steps backwards and furrows his brows at me. “Ouch!”

     “Are you taking my car?”

    He nods. “Where –”

     “In the magnetic key holder on the fridge.”

     “Okay, sis.” He smiles at me, leaning forward to ruffle my hair – which makes it even messier than it already was. “Go away!” I grumble, trying to pat his hand away. “Never!” He calls out, turning toward the kitchen to grab the keys.

    I shake my head and laugh. “Love you!”

    He shouts back, without looking behind at me. “Love you most!”

****

    The delicious smell of pancakes reminds me of the fact that I haven’t eaten since last night. I drag my feet to the kitchen, mentally preparing myself for the person I’m about to encounter in there.

     “Uh, hi…” I hesitantly call out, entering the kitchen – and notice a very shirtless Owen, with his very shirtless back turned towards me. He turns around at the sound of my voice, and a few strands of golden blonde hair fall across his eyes. I long to reach my hand across and push those away.

    Instead, he himself does that as his eyes flit over me, and a look of pain flashes through his eyes. I hate that I’m the cause of that.

     “I was wondering how you would ignore me when we’re living in the same apartment.”

     “I deserve that.” I walk over to the stove to stand beside him.

    He ignores me and goes back to flipping golden brown pancakes which smell amazing, but all I can focus on is the curve of his back, the hollow space between his collarbones, and the way his hands grip on the pan a little too hard. I feel a warmth course through my body and find myself missing the way he used to wrap his arms around me from behind in the mornings when Charlie was still asleep.

     “Owen,” I whisper, and he inhales sharply at that. “Please. I don’t want things to be like this – I don’t want us to be like this.”

    He uses his spatula to lift the pancake and puts it atop other pancakes on a plate beside the stove and turns it off. He turns around to face me, biting his lip and I think I just had an aneurysm because of the intensity of his gaze.

    He sighs, leaning against the counter. “Y/N. You made it pretty clear that there would never be an ‘us.’”

     “I know. But we can still be friends, right? Like we were before… everything.”

     “See, that’s the thing. I can’t. Y/N, do you have any idea what you’ve put me through for the past two weeks?” He snaps.

     “Do you have any idea what I’ve been through?” I reply, hotly. “Owen, it broke me inside to ask you to stay away. Do you have any idea how much I care about you?”

     “No! I don’t, because you don’t talk to me, Y/N.”

     “I told you, there is no point in doing long distance –”

     “That’s bullshit, Y/N, and you know it, too. I think you’re just too scared to be with me because you think that I’d break your heart, leave you alone or hurt you. But that’s the thing, Y/N – I won’t do any of that to you, because that’s exactly what you’re doing to me.” He crosses his arms across his chest.

    I breathe out shakily, running a hand through my curls. “That’s not true –”

    Owen scoffs. “Please, Y/N. I know you.”

    I lower my eyes from his because I can’t handle the way he’s looking at me.

     “Y/N, do you know how fucking hard the past week’s been for me? I can’t even talk to anyone about it, because the only person I wanna talk to is your brother and we all know what will happen if I do that. He’s my best friend, and I’ve been lying to him for weeks, pretending that I like this hairdresser, when in reality, I’m head over heels for his sister. I can’t tell him that I can’t stop thinking about her, and that she’s the only person that can calm me down when I get anxious on set. I can’t tell him that she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and it’s killing me inside to not talk to her!”

    He finishes, breathing out heavily. I look at his eyes and notice that they’re gleaming.

     “Wait, what hairdresser?”

    He scoffs, annoyed. “Seriously, Y/N?”

    I shrug and breathe deeply, trying to stop myself from taking his hands in my own. “You know, there are so many guys at school that ask me out, but I can’t go out with any of them, because guess what, they’re not you. I like you so much, Owen, so, so much, but I can’t do anything about it – because you’re right. I’m scared. I’m terrified that you’ll leave me, because I haven’t felt this way about anyone in a really long time. I’m so scared that one day you’ll wake up and realize that I’m not who you want anymore. I’m scared that maybe you’ll hurt me or meet someone else in Vancouver. I’m scared about so many things because that’s exactly how much I care about you, Owen!”

    I take a step further and we are standing mere inches apart. I can feel him breathe out raggedly and see the curve of his nose and his darkened eyes flickering to my lips.

     “I would never, ever do that to you, Y/N. You mean a lot to me. Please, please believe me.” He whispers out, and I tell myself to stop, to turn back, to go into my room but instead I just stand there and watch him exhale out, and I know he’s feeling anxious. I lift a hand to his face and cup his cheek in the palm of my hand and he leans his face onto my hand, resting his right hand over mine. The gesture calms the both of us down, and I know, in that moment, that I believe him. That he, us – is a risk worth taking.

     “Your hands are so cold.” He whispers. I nod. “Yours are warm.”

    Both of us stand there, in the kitchen, trying to make sense of what just happened – trying to hold on to this moment. A silence engulfs the both of us, as I sort through my thoughts.

     “Owen,” I whisper. He flicks his eyes to mine. “Promise me you won’t do any of that.”

    He raises his left hand, jutting out his little finger. I raise my other hand too, and he wraps his little finger around mine and whispers back, “Pinkie promise.”

     “Okay.” I whisper, neither of us daring to uncurl our fingers or look anywhere else.

     “Promise me that you wouldn’t leave me for some future tech billionaire.”

    I scrunch my face up at that. “What? No!”

     “Promise me you’d call –”

     “Every single day, Owen. You too.”

    Both of us nod together, and he lifts his other hand to tuck a curl that had previously escaped from my actually-messy-and-not-cute bun. “You’re so beautiful.”

    I smile, and a tear escapes my eyes – Owen rubbing it away with his thumb. I lean forward, standing on my tiptoes and rest my hands against his bare chest for support as I press my lips to his. He smiles against the kiss, and I feel as if a zoo has gone wild in my stomach. I feel warmth and happiness course through my veins as Owen deepens the kiss, the intense longing in the both of us for each other clawing its way out to the surface. It’s almost as if I’m drinking water for the first time in a week. He tastes like banana pancakes, chocolate syrup and everything good in the world. I press myself against him, wrapping my arms around neck while he does the same around my torso. It frightens me a little how well our bodies fit against each other – but it makes me feel strong knowing that I have an amazing person who genuinely cares about me.

****

CHARLIE’S POV

    Charlie unlocked the door to his sister’s apartment, mentally noting to remind her of the fact that her car desperately needs a wash. He enters the foyer, and drops the keys in a bowl, kicking off his shoes.

    Suddenly, he pauses, noticing how incredibly quiet the apartment is – which is unlike Y/N. She always has music blasting or the TV running – she hates the quiet. He quickly walks into the living room and almost screams in surprise.

    His little sister and his best friend are curled up on the sofa, their backs towards him. Y/N is lying on Owen’s chest and she has an arm wrapped around his torso while Owen’s arms are interlocked at the front, holding her against his body. Their tangled legs peek from underneath the quilt that Charlie and Y/N’s mother knit for her youngest daughter last Christmas. She laughs at something that Owen whispers into her ear, and he presses a kiss to her forehead, and they look at each other with so much adoration that Charlie has to look away.

    He sighs, mentally cursing himself for being so, so stupid. How could he have ignored the signs? Charlie remembers Y/N and Owen meeting, both in a daze, both smiling a little too much and Y/N walking with a skip in her steps. He remembers them talking for hours on end, binging Brooklyn 99 on weekends, and always hanging out with each other whenever they went to the same parties. He remembers that morning three weeks ago when he’d woken up late, and gone to the kitchen only to find the duo springing apart from each other, both erupting in a flurry of coughs and laughs, as if he’d just walked on them robbing a bank – Owen had explained that he had apparently broken a glass. He remembers the way Owen would look at her, as if she had just done something miraculous. He remembers the way Y/N would look at his best friend, as if he was made of everything good in the world.

    Most of all, he remembers how Owen sulked whenever he was alone back in Vancouver. He remembers how Owen constantly declined to go out with that cute hairdresser. He remembers how Owen sometimes seemed out of it. He remembers how Owen would sprint whenever Charlie called his sister. He remembers how Owen would keep checking his phone every few minutes in between takes.

    Charlie also remembers his sister asking about how Owen is when they talked on the phone, and how her voice seemed like she was asking something that was forbidden, something that was evil. He remembers how she would always hang up the phone whenever she heard Owen���s voice. He remembers her always declining his invites to go to Vancouver.

    How could he have been so dumb? The signs were right there. He lived with Owen, for god’s sake! Charlie feels an array of emotions. He’s always hated Y/N’s choice in men, despised anyone putting their hands on his baby sister’s body.

    But, to see them like this – to see Y/N look so safe, so comfortable in Owen’s arms, he can’t help but feel relief flood into his system. Because he knows his best friend, and he knows what kind of person he is. And now, he thinks just how much sense they make together. Sure, Owen is kind of stupid, reckless, impulsive, and clumsy – but so is Y/N – well, she’s not stupid, he thinks. She’s the smartest person in their family. But she has a fire within her – and his best friend matches that fire. Charlie thinks of the fact that they complement each other so nicely, both are caring, passionate, and kind-hearted. Of course, they would fall for each other. It just makes so much sense – they make so much sense.

    Still, Charlie feels hurt that neither of them bothered to tell him about it. (even though he won’t admit it, it’s understandable, really – considering the way he’s bugged his sister about her previous relationships.)

    He clears his throat and the duo on the couch jump apart, both flushed and with their eyes widened. Owen stands up, moving away from couch, while Y/N looks at her brother as if he’s a ghost.

    A silence falls over the apartment. Y/N finally says, “How’d you – how’d you get in?”

    He shrugs. “I had a spare key.”

    Owen looks between his girlfriend and his best friend, with widened eyes. “Charlie, I’m so sorry –”

    Suddenly, Charlie laughs, swatting at the air. “Pfft. You think I’m gonna be the weird brother who kills his best friend for dating his sister? Come on, this isn’t a TV show. I’m actually really happy for you guys – I ignored all the signs these past weeks, but I see them now. Of course, it’s really weird for me, but I love the both of you so much. Owen, relax, I’m not gonna kill you. Dude. Just don’t kiss or anything in front of me, cause that’s gross. Ew. You know what, don’t do that at all. And I’ll kill you, Owen, if you ever hurt her, I swear. I’ll put poison in your waffles. I just don’t understand why –”

    Charlie is cut off by his sister tackling him in a hug. He wraps his arms around her body, as she whispers, “I love you, big brother.”

    He murmurs, “Love you most, little one.” He catches Owen’s eye who looks at him with gratefulness and a little smile.

 **** 

READ ON AO3 WITH OC!

drop an ask or a message to be in my jatp taglist!! requests also open <3

[shinysobi]

i came in from the outside, burnt out from the joyride (ii)

this was born out of a conversation with @akinosakiya, so all credits go to her >.<

chapter 1 | chapter 2 | coming soon

ao3

(A/N: so... i am extremely sorry for not updating,,, uni and life has been generally kicking my ass pretty horribly (im in my final semester lol) and while i am not generally very happy with this chapter, it is important because it sets up a lot of things in the future yeeet)

word count: 4955

Attorney Park wishes her good luck as she leaves for the courthouse the next day, and Sol can’t help but feel as though he was laughing at her for some reason, and frantically checks for food stuck in her teeth on the way to the courthouse. There isn’t any, so she’s left to wonder exactly what the hell he meant when he had sent her off with a very cryptic “see you soon, Kang Sol.”

“What did he even mean?” she mutters to herself, calling her sister, “Ah, Byeol, remember to go to your academy today, all right?”

“Okay, eonni,” her sister replies, “you’re at the courthouse, aren’t you?”

“Hmm, I have a case to win,” she replies, and Byeol wishes her good luck before the call goes silent, and she allows herself a rare moment of self-reflection, taking in the image of the Courthouse. It’s imposing, but she curiously feels at home here, in the middle of the city where the noise of the cars is so loud, she can’t hear the person next to her sometimes. There’s something magical about the courthouse, and she isn’t romanticising it, but the idea of fighting for justice, no matter how imperfect, it fills her with pride, even more so when she knows that what she is doing is for good.

Not to say that there aren’t any downsides to it, either. She gets threats almost on the daily, from disgruntled clients and from people who want her to take the case, even though she knows it would be an affront to her dignity. The Dean’s voice floats into her ear, reciting the Attorneys-at-act law that allows her to reject a case if she wants to. Right. It does not feel like an insult to her now like it had done then, the act, because she chose to take this case on, and yet, here she is, standing in front of the courthouse, wearing her nicest clothes (Yeseul had raised an eyebrow, but she was too tired to pay any attention to her) and dreading her turn to go inside.

“Eonni!” a voice calls out, and it’s Yeseul, dressed for a case, “how long do you have before you have to go in?” Sol doesn’t need to check her watch to tell the time that is left, ten minutes on the dot, and she’s waiting for her client to come through, still in police custody, something which she had failed to stop, “are you staring off into space again?”

She recovers quickly, “no, I was just waiting for the defendant to be brought here by the police.” She turns to Yeseul, who’s evidently not had much sleep, “why are you here in my case? Didn’t you wrap one up today?”

“Ah, I did,” Yeseul smiles, taking a hold of Sol’s arm, “but I’m here now, aren’t I? I thought you would need some support, you know, since you—”

She doesn’t complete the sentence. She doesn’t need to. Sol smiles at her, loops their arms together, and says, “do you want to have coffee?”

Yeseul grins, “I’d love to.”

—

No matter how many times she’s walked in here, and no matter how much the courthouse makes her feel at ease, there’s still a part of her that is anxious when she stands in front of it, hoping that she might be able to provide adequate justice to the person she was defending. It throws her off sometimes, the court of law. But she can always find her way back to it, and perhaps this is why she loves it, loves being able to defend people from being betrayed by the same system that they had put so much trust in, betrayed, just like she had been. It’s as though the law is apologising to her, albeit in its own, slightly twisted way.

The defendant, Je Sang-Hee, sits at her designated position, looking at her, and Sol draws herself up to her full height, careful to not catch anyone’s eye on the other side of the courthouse. Its oddly suffocating, the courthouse today, the air thick with a sort of anticipation that she doesn’t really want to address. Yeseul squeezes her arm, whispering, “you’ll do good, eonni,” and all of a sudden, she’s standing there, alone, with only her wits there for help. Shit. I wish I had had gotten drunk last night. At least this would have been hazier.

She approaches the bench, the defendant sitting silently, and tries to reassure her, “don’t worry, we’ll clear your name, all right?” she’s met with silence, as Sang-Hee only nods, her eyes welling with unshed tears. It’s heart-breaking, the way Sang-Hee has accepted her punishment, accepted that she would be going to prison anyway, so, nothing really matters. Sol doesn’t want that for her. She doesn’t want that for anyone, not even the worst of criminals. Sure, she may not be defending them in the court of law, but everyone should benefit from the assumption of innocence. She may not be the one speaking up for them, but she does wish that people have the opportunity to prove themselves innocent.

There aren’t many people in attendance in the courthouse today, which is a blessing, but she also has to deal with pesky reporters stationed outside, who seemed to have taken an interest in the woman accused of attempted murder, despite having really, no evidence against her. It was funny, how people jumped to conclusions, just because of the person’s backgrounds, or due to a particular defamatory article that may have been published about them online. Sang-Hee had had one published about her, filled with lies so vile that Sol couldn’t even read through it once.

“Sang-Hee ssi,” She says, approaching the defendant’s bench, “how are you feeling today?”

Je Sang-Hee looks at her, eyes still shining with tears, and lowers her gaze. She can’t even speak. Sol is angry, of course, but even more than the anger that simmers inside of her, is frustration, for not being able to protect her client, frustration at being unable to be the person there for the victim.

“Eonni,” Yeseul’s voice drags her out of her little reverie, “eonni, I think Joon-hwi oppa is here now.”

Sol squints at the younger girl, “who told you that?”

Yeseul holds up her phone, “Bok-gi is going to be here too, so he texted me. The two of them are going to come along, him and Jiho. Jiho should be here by now, but he hasn’t texted yet.”

Sol just—stares at Yeseul for a moment, trying to understand the volley of information that had just been thrown at her, in a manner not unlike that of Professor Yang, the man who, Sol recollects with regret, had heard about this whole mess from Sol B, but had not once offered to help. She didn’t need his help, though. It’s just that he could have offered to help her, and it would have been nice.

“Eonni,” Yeseul says, warning evident in her voice, “he’s here.”

What she doesn’t say, but Sol knows, is the sentence, don’t worry, I’m here for you. I’ll be here for you. She didn’t need it, per se, but it felt nice to know that at least one person had her back in this courthouse. Bok-gi was of course, on her side too, but she knew he wouldn’t sacrifice Joon-Hwi. Not now, anyway.

“You have your back to the Prosecutor’s bench,” Yeseul elbows her lightly, and she realises that yes, she has indeed been standing with her back towards the Prosecution’s bench all this while, and most importantly, there was someone behind her.

“Attorney Kang,” She knows that voice, has heard it in her head for years now, but Kang Sol finds herself unable to lift her gaze from the linoleum floor as she grasps the warm hand that was now being offered to her, “nice to meet you, finally.”

There’s a teasing lilt to the last word, a certain edge to the syllable that she knows all too well, having been subjected to it for hours on end, in classes, in the copy room, in the café, even in her mind. It’s from a voice she knows all too well, someone she had wronged.

Courage, Kang Sol.

“Hello, Prosecutor Han,” she looks up, extending one hand to the man in front of her, and—

She didn’t have any expectations of how she would meet Han Joon-Hwi after so many years, but in the deeper recesses of her mind, she had a thought; of his eyes widening at seeing her face for the first time in so many years, her falling in love with him all over again. She had thought of looking—no, not just looking, looking at him, for the first time in so many years, after that one fateful day when she ignored the words of her heat and went running far away from him, perhaps falling in love all over again.

Instead—she feels nothing. Perhaps a pang of guilt somewhere in the recesses of her mind, but when she looks into the eyes of Han Joon-Hwi, her best friend, the person she had fallen in love with, Kang Sol doesn’t see anyone but a weathered prosecutor, the boy who had called out her name on graduation day in Hankuk Law school long gone. Even though he looks not a day older, even though his eyes still crinkle in the same way when he smiles, and his hand still holds the same weight when he takes her hand for a handshake, but she can’t find the boy she was in love with anymore.

“Attorney Kang,” he grins, and his voice is the same, teasing when he looks at her, smiles at her, but he is her opponent, she has to defeat him today. This isn’t preparing for mock trials and judicial competitions, where they only played at being lawyers and prosecutors, this is real life. Je Sang-Hee’s life depends upon her, Kang Sol, winning this case. Against him, Han Joon-Hwi.

“Noona, nice to see you again,” Bok-gi pushes forward, giving her a warm hug, which does its job to dissipate all errant thoughts of a boy whose smile had haunted her in her dreams, “I’ll be watching today, my law firm asked me to—”

“Don’t worry about that,” she assures him, “you can take all the notes you want.” He’s still looking at her, she realises when she lets go of Bok-gi, Han Joon-Hwi is still staring at me. Do I have something in my teeth? “Good luck today, Prosecutor Han.”

He grins at her then, dimpled smile making her heart skip a beat, and says, “I don’t need luck, Attorney Kang,” before sauntering off to his seat.

Kang Sol clenches her jaw. Asshole.

--

He wasn’t sure how it would be—their meeting for the first time, but Joon isn’t going to say he’s dissatisfied with it. sure, she’s grown up now—she isn’t Kang Sol A anymore, she goes by just Kang Sol, and he doesn’t have the pesky tag of second-round judicial passer hanging around his neck anymore.

She had stared him down, and to no surprise, he still found her beautiful. Sure, he had always thought that there was a sort of magnetic aura around Sol, something that commanded the attention of an entire room when she walked in. She looked the same as she had looked, five years ago, when he had tried to confess to her, and she had rejected him. Sol hadn’t told him that she was rejecting him, at least not explicitly; Han Joon-Hwi was a man who could take a hint, especially if it ran away from him while he was in the middle of his confession. Really, Kang Sol. You made me chase you all the way to this courtroom.

A hand slams down on his desk, and Seo Jiho’s irritated voice tells him, “If you’re going to stare, at least do it properly.”

He sputters, suddenly thankful that his co-prosecutor was running late, as he stood up to stare at his ex-roommate, who was porting a very uncharacteristic grin, “what do you mean by that? I wasn’t staring.”

“Sure, you weren’t,” Jiho says, and even Bok-gi sniggers at him, “you were just looking in the general direction of Sol noona, so much so that everyone in the room thinks that the two of you are either dating, or that you want to kill her. Personally, I prefer the latter.”

He doesn’t say anything, just grumbles under his breath, and Jiho presses on, “did you prepare well for this case? You do realise that your evidence is weak, do you?”

“Ah, of course, hyung knows it,” Bok-gi steps in to intervene, and Joon-Hwi thinks for a moment that yes, Bok-gi was always one of the better ones, and then he opens his mouth again, “he’s just ignoring all the things he said before entering the courthouse, and proving to all of us how much of a hypocrite he is.”

Joon glares at Bok-gi, who is giggling at him now, and turns to look at the judge’s bench a pout on his face. Sure, he had proclaimed in the car that he would “not be looking at her, nope”, and the fact that it had taken him exactly three minutes to break that promise was bit laughable, but his friends didn’t have to rub it into his face.

“I don’t understand,” Bok-gi asks, “why are you still hung up on her? You basically took this case just so you could meet her again, and even though the two of you haven’t talked in years, you still talk about her, you still ask about her when you get the chance, so what is going on?”

Joon-Hwi doesn’t answer. He knows what is going on, why he has been so intent on meeting Kang Sol, even after so long, but he doesn’t want to—no, he can’t tell Bok-gi that. He feels a pang of guilt whenever he even thinks of telling Bok-gi the actual reason behind him running after Sol, even though she had made it abundantly clear that she didn’t want to have anything to do with him.

He wonders, sometimes.

His co-prosecutor arrives in the courtroom, almost gliding over the floor to take their seat, and he can see Kang Sol shrink back a little, obviously intimidated. He doesn’t hide his smile anymore, not that he needs to either. She didn’t have to get flustered over his co-prosecutor entering the damn courtroom. She’s never done that, at least from what Bok-gi and Yebeom have told him; even Jiho had pitched in with his own comments sometimes, knowing exactly how much it pissed him off, but he still did it. Every time he met Bok-gi or he met Yeseul, he would ask about her, waiting for them to respond with “oh, she’s doing okay, oppa” and “I met her a few weeks ago, she was fine, hyung” and they move on after that, but he can’t.

They don’t possibly expect him to move on from her, do they?

“All rise,” the bailiff announces, and he dutifully stands up, watching out of the corner of his eye as Sol gently helps the defendant to rise up alongside her, before being seated again. She still did that little thing when she looked around the entire courtroom for people watching her, he thinks to herself. She’s still the same Sol. No, she’s different now. We both are. We both are different, but there’s still things about her that remind me of the times we spent in Hankuk.

“Prosecutor Han,” the judge tells him, and he stands up quickly to his feet, “begin.”

“Thank you, Your Honour,” He says, walking out to the defendant’s bench, “defendant Je Sang-Hee, you were indicted on charges of attempted murder, following an attack on your fiancé, Seo Changmin, on the fourteenth of November, two weeks prior to your indictment.”

“Yes, I was,” she begins, “but I didn’t do anything to—”

“I’ll be the one asking questions here,” he cuts her off with a dismissive wave of his hand, and out of the corner of his eye, he can see Sol draw an almost-imperceptible breath, shaking her head at him. She isn’t flustered. He’s very sure she isn’t flustered, because the two of them have been on opposite sides of each other, time and time again, “could you confirm that Seo Changmin suffered injuries because of you?”

She stares at him, defiant, and replies, “he did not suffer injuries because of me, I found him and I called the police, I’ve told you this.”

“Yes, you have,” Joon walks to the front of the witness’ bench, “but your whereabouts were also unknown that night, until that fateful moment when you actually found your fiancé, and proceeded to assault him. Is that right?”

She looks at him, scowling. He’s hit a nerve, apparently. They had been harping on that aspect for far too long than what was necessary, Joon had noticed when he had been preparing. He couldn’t go that way when he questioned her, because he knows Sol has prepared for it.

So, he changes his track of questioning, “Ms Sang-Hee, would I be wrong in assuming that Mr Changmin had visited you five times over the three days prior to the accident?”

She stares at him, “he is my fiancé. Or he was, before the accident happened. It wasn’t unusual for him to visit me multiple times in a single day.”

He stops, “and yet, when the police asked you about the reason of his visits, you chose to remain silent, evading the question—”

“Objection,” Sol says calmly, standing up from her seat, “the prosecution cannot ask leading questions.”

“Sustained,” the judge replies smoothly, even before Joon-Hwi has a chance to respond, “Prosecutor Han, you cannot possibly expect me to accept this in the courthouse.”

He nods his head, slightly irritated, now that she has taken his advantage away, “moving on, Ms. Sang-Hee, when you found Seo Changmin unconscious, why did you not call for an ambulance? You waited ten minutes to call an ambulance, which most people would argue, looks strange, does it not?”

She doesn’t back down an inch. Good. He hadn’t thought she would either. They didn’t have enough evidence to show that she was guilty, her indictment based primarily on circumstantial evidence that even the most punishment-happy of all judges would find difficulty agreeing with. But they had had her indicted, and now they were here, trying to get her a sentence that would be as heavy as possible. Sol had been right. He didn’t have to worry about the defendant, not as a prosecutor. He just had to punish people to the full extent of the law.

“I tried to wake him up multiple times, but he didn’t respond,” Sang-Hee responds, staring at the judge, “I didn’t think it was out of the ordinary, since he had always had a drinking problem, but when he didn’t respond to me calling his name in the morning, that was when I grew worried.”

She looks at him once, then back to her lawyer, Sol, who looked as though she wanted to strangle him. good. This means I’m winning, and turns back to him, “it was like him to come back drunk, so drunk that he could barely remember where he was, and his friends would drop him off at my house, with apologies, but he would repeat his behaviour. I wasn’t too worried when he didn’t respond to my calls at night, but by morning, he would usually be awake and demanding breakfast. That was when I started to get anxious.”

“Anxious? Not worried?” he asks, curiosity spiked by her peculiar choice of words, “were you anxious that he was actually dead? Or were you anxious that your—”

“he’s my fiancé, of course I would be anxious if he was not responding to my calls,” Sang-Hee stares at him, “you must not have dated a lot if you think I wouldn’t have been worried about my fiancé.”

A wave of laughter runs through the court, and he can feel the tips of his ears turn red. Even the judge cracks a smile, and he can see both Bok-gi and Jiho sniggering. They’re never going to let me live this one down, “so, you called the police then, who found your fiancé almost dead from a drug overdose.”

“Yes,” she looks at her hands, fingers intertwined, “they told me he had taken it about four hours before I called them.”

Ah, there it is. He knew it would come to this, he had known there was no way to win this case after all, even if he really did want to win. There were things he couldn’t do after all, despite being what they called a ‘star prosecutor’. “No more questions.”

The smile on Sol’s face is enough to tell him that he’s lost this case. Oddly enough, he doesn’t feel disappointed, even as his partner shoots dirty looks at him, a clear violation of courtroom conduct, but he can’t bring himself to care, fixated on the way she looks while cross-examinating the defendant, the way she turns to the judge and says “no more questions, your Honour.” It’s a far cry from the Sol he remembers at law school, the one who would have him act as prosecutor whenever she went up in a mock trial, even if he had been assigned the role of prosecutor, going up against her. She always asked him to help her practise, and like the fool that he was, he always helped her. Even now, as he stands there, watching her, it’s almost as though he is back at Hankuk; almost, but not quite.

“Court adjourned for the day, and will convene for the next trial on—” Joon can feel himself growing more and more antsy, as the judge announces the date for the next trial, and that Sang-Hee can be released from Judicial custody, especially since her health had been failing due to the stress of the trial and asthma, from which she had suffered since she was young.

He hurries out of the courthouse, only to be cornered by Jiho and Bok-gi at the entrance, Bok-gi with a large grin on his face and Jiho with his trademark expressionless look, although he knows both of them were going to tease him about this, possibly till he died and perhaps even then, they would find a way to sneak it into his eulogy.

Strangely, he didn’t mind it at all.

“Hyung, where are you going?” Bok-gi asks, even as Joon desperately tries to catch a glimpse of Sol through the now-closing courtroom doors, “shouldn’t you be preparing for the next date?”

He looks at Bok-gi for a second, eyes widening, “what are you talking about?”

Bok-Gi’s smile gets wider, if that’s possible, “really? What were you thinking about, hyung? I was talking about the next court date.”

Joon-Hwi huffs, “I was thinking about the same thing, Min Bok-Gi; now, if you will—”

Jiho opens his mouth to say something, but Joon barrels past the two of them, running down the stone steps and to the driveway, where his car was parked, and, presumably, Sol’s too. She’s walking faster now, and he has to run to keep up with her. Her ponytail bobs as she takes quick steps, in a hurry to get away from the courthouse complex. He doesn’t blame her at all.

“Sunbae!” he calls out, loud enough to catch the attention of quite a few people, “Sunbae!”

That catches her attention all right, and she stops in her tracks, turning to him, an irritated expression on her face. It doesn’t stay for long, however, fading just as quickly as it came, “so, you’re still sticking with that name, Han Joon-Hwi?”

He grins, “of course. It wouldn’t be me and you, if I didn’t call you Sunbae, Sunbae.”

She stares at him, with an expression he can’t quite place. “I thought we didn’t have that sort of a relationship anymore, Prosecutor Han.”

And, there it is. He can’t deny it and say that it doesn’t hurt to be treated by Sol this way, but he’s nothing if not tenacious, so he pushes on, “you did good today, in there.”

She doesn’t say anything, simply nods her head, before replying with a curt, “good job today, Prosecutor Han.” Of course, she would say that; he doesn’t want to admit it, but it sort of feels like she had slapped him full across the face. Who am I kidding, if she had done that, it would have perhaps hurt less. He feels like a fool, standing in the middle of the road, calling out her name, and a years-old nickname that she didn’t like, and one that he felt only held significance for him.

What they had not had was closure; or at least for him, it was that, the absence of a final answer to his unasked question, something between them still hanging in the air. She could ignore it, live on with her life, but he cannot. There should have been closure, he’s told himself time and time again, or was I just too unimportant for her to even give a damn. It isn’t true, he knows, Sol wouldn’t do that to him, or to anyone else for that matter, but on some nights, it becomes impossible. He doesn’t blame her either; he blames his own self for the loss of his closest friend. If only he hadn’t been stubborn enough to ask her out on the day of graduation. He should have waited a little bit more.

But then, should he have waited?

“Sol!” he calls out again, jogging lightly to keep up with her steps, “Sol! Wait up for a minute—”

He’s interrupted, Sol turning abruptly to meet him halfway, which results in him having to backtrack, “what do you want now?”

He smiles brightly, “how about Pyongyang naengmyeon? I know a place nearby that’s good.”

She stares at him, like she can’t really figure out his deal. He holds up his hands, “look, all I’m asking for is a meal. No strings attached.”

Surprisingly, she nods once, turning on her heel, “lead the way, Prosecutor Han.”

--

I should not be doing this.

Her phone buzzes, and it’s Yeseul. You should not be doing this, the text reads, and Sol has to gather all her willpower to not scream in the middle of the street, I know, I fucking know, I shouldn’t be doing this with him right now, going for lunch when there’s—no, I just cannot do it.

She thinks it would be good, for her to have one lunch with him, to get him out of her system, Yeseul’s wisdom about not having lunch with someone who is technically her opponent in the court be damned. She just needs to have lunch with him once, and then she can stop feeling this way.

The restaurant is small, but bright light filters in through the large windows as they take a seat at one of the empty tables. There are a lot of them, she thinks, looking around, just after the lunchtime rush, or the restaurant wasn’t a very good one. Either way, she was supposed to be having a meal with Han Joon-Hwi right now, and as Sol takes a seat, she realises she had been vastly unprepared for this meeting.

He doesn’t look like the Joon she knew back in Hankuk, that is certain, but he doesn’t look like what her imagination had unhelpfully supplied her with either. He looks every inch the prosecutor, with dark circles underneath his eyes and that slouching posture she supposes every prosecutor has, as though he had been carrying the weight of the whole world. It’s sad, somehow.

“Are you going to order?”

“Hm?” She turns her gaze, and sure enough, he’s looking at her just like he had done all those years ago, when she had a stupid letter attached to her name like a real-life suffix that followed one around, and he used to lean over tables and grin all up in her face and mock her by saying Sunbae. It’s—uncomfortable. She didn’t think she would revert to her university self so easily, but with him, it feels like second nature, “You said Pyongyang naengmyeon, so we should get Pyongyang naengmyeon.”

“All right,” he teases, but it’s light, the kind of tone one would use with a co-worker, which strikes her as somehow offensive (am I not more important than a co-worker?) and she spots a glint of something else in his eyes, but shakes her head free of the thought, just as he says, “so, how is work?”

She rolls her eyes, “I don’t think you asked me to lunch after all these years just to talk to me about work, Han Joon-Hwi.”

He smiles, “right, I didn’t, two orders of beef bone soup, please.”

She stares at him, “it’s summer,” and turns back to the ahjumma, “two orders of Pyongyang naengmyeon, please.”

He just shakes his head, looking at her in that funny way, and asks, “so, do you remember, or do you not?”

What is he even asking me about? “No, I don’t,” she replies, pouring out water for the both of them, “what are you even talking about?”

He shakes his head at her again, “never mind. Let’s eat.”

She can’t help but feel as though she had just missed something important, at least by the look on his face. Or maybe that’s the naengmyeon talking.

[7wanderingpaws]

He Loves Love (3/3)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: solo singer! AU

Word count: 4K+

Warnings: none! just a playful Baek!

--- Please make sure to read the the notes at the end! ---

Masterlist

tags: @iloveagain​ @buttercupbbh​ @wooya1224​ @baekberrie​ (sorry if I left out someone? its been ages since i updated and I didnt know if its okay to tag those who commented on chap. 2 :( didnt want to be rude ><)

1 <<< 2 <<< 3

It was the day of the release. The release of his magazine cover.

The PR went… mad.

“Listen, sweetie, editor, I don't think we will have enough pieces. The damn thing is literally going to be sold out in a matter of hours.”

You received this call before lunch time. Lunch time was very early on in the day. So why was Baekhyun's magazine cover about to be sold out in the entirety of Korea on the same day of the release date?

“Erm, yeah about that. I am an editor, just like you said. You need to call the-”

“I know, I know,” she interrupted but there wasn't an inch of impatience in her voice. “What I am trying to say is - congratulations! You did a great job!”

It took you a moment to realize what she was saying, because she was right. Your participation in this issue was big; after all you took care of the props and settings and you were looking over his pictures during the photoshoot. Out of nowhere, your heartbeat sped up. “Oh, thank you! That's very kind of you, but I still need to improve a lot-”

In that moment, the happy ding! that never failed to make you all trembly and nervous, sounded on your desk.

Waiter: miss editor am I seeing correctly????? wowow ihavenowords

Waiter: did you just make me sell out your magazine?????? ihavenowords

Waiter: did you save yourself at least one piece??? huhuuhuhuuu ihavenowords ><

Waiter: i think someone just made themselves a good name in the mag industry ^^ congratulations!!!

Waiter: does that mean i will get to see you? hmmm maybe to give a congratulatory bouquet of flowers???? 🤭🤭🤭 🌹💐🌺

Biting your lip quickly to suppress the happy grin, you quickly attended to the phone call, chatting a bit more with the PR lady. Honestly, you didn't like to talk to them much as they were all over the place, too demanding and didn’t have a great understanding of a creative mind. Thankfully, you didn't have to deal with them too often.

It hadn't been that long since your last meeting with Baekhyun. His kisses on your cheek and one kiss on your forehead seemed to be still burning on your skin, sometimes making you drag the pad of your index finger over the mentioned places, needing some sort of closure from him that you had yet to receive. 

Texting now was a full on habit between you, causing you to become sad, disappointed and even anxious if he wouldn’t reply that soon, worried he changed his mind about you, and his feelings towards you. Because even though you admitted to him that you liked him, he was being still very cautious, still very polite with you, as if there was some sort of invisible line between you two that he was scared to cross, for some reason.

Trying to look at it from his point of view, there were many risks of him wanting a relationship with you, and you couldn't not agree. If anything, you were being thankful for his thoughtfulness and carefulness, for if he messed up even the tiniest bit around you and your secret meetings of a blooming start of a relationship, he would not see the end of the hate, and neither would you. Heck, his career was on the line.

You managed to reply to his playful messages that went on and on, before you would have to dive into another cover magazine plan that you had to start thinking through.

Me: I think I should congratulate YOU! the most wanted man in Korea it seems ;)

Me: these days i have some important meetings… an upcoming cover… im definitely doing overtime today :( when is it good for you? I will try to arrange my schedule with yours

Waiter: ohoh the most wanted man you say? i wonder if the one i want wants me just as much…….???

Waiter: i would like to see you more often before my album drops, you know i will get quite busy and not seeing you for too long doesnt seem to work well with me anymore ><

Waiter: sooo… i will come pick you up from work tonight just shoot me a msg *^

Just as his messages could make your heartbeat go into a crazy overdrive, it seemed he could also make it completely stop. Or so you thought. His flirting and now his proposal to pick you up gave you a huge shock. That would be a first for sure.

Me: sure! have your phone with you Mr Korea

Me: I wonder too if that person wants you as much ;)

You decided not to pay him any more attention after that as much as you were tempted. Your belly was levitating along with your body, feeling high on vitamin Baekhyun. Pressing down the urge to tease him, you put your phone away, your hands slightly trembly from the attention you kept receiving from someone like him.

If your predictions were even close to correct, you wanted to tell him: yes, the one that he wanted, wanted him just as much.

…

You were fast to leave your work that day. Excited butterflies were eating your insides away, and the only way to make them calm down was to finally meet the person who always made their wings flutter.

Baekhyun was already parked in the underground parking lot, his car the only one with the motor on - and the only car of his class. You spotted him sitting in his car in his white jersey shirt, his left elbow propped on the windowsill as his index finger was stuck between his teeth, gnawing at it. When he saw you, he took a double-take and quickly changed his posture which made you giggle.

Baekhyun was following you with his eyes, going even to the length of leaning in over the passenger seat so as not to lose sight of you until he reached over and opened the passenger door for you so you could slide in.

“Why, thank you,” you smiled cheerfully as you sat down. You closed the door and put your bag down in between your legs.

“My pleasure,” he said back with a pleasant smile. “Hand me the bag, I'll put it in the backseat.”

You quickly did as he asked and then reached for your seatbelt.

“How was work today? We should celebrate!” he exclaimed as he put the car into drive and made his way out of the parking lot.

You hummed, gnawing on your lip. “That would be wonderful,” you said but hesitated about offering anything further. It was difficult to read the situation; you wouldn't know what you could afford to do with him and what not; what would be stepping over the line and what wouldn't. But Baekhyun said he liked you. In fact, he even told you to look at him like at any other man. That meant you shouldn't doubt all the possible hang-out ideas you had, right?

“I think it is you who deserves a gift,” you murmured and stole a look at his concentrated face. You reached the outside now, the dark evening slowly changing into night, the light of passing cars illuminating your faces.

“Hmm, I think so, too. Something in lines of - I can pick whatever I want, huh?”

Hiding your smile behind your hand, you nodded. “Yes, I can grant something. But don't make it expensive. Even though you sold out our magazine, it doesn't mean I will get a pay rise right away.”

“Oh, it won't include any monetary value,” he promised and turned to look at you when he stopped at the red light, the line in front of you seemingly going on for at least a mile. “It would be something you can and should be able to do freely.”

Despite the darkness of the car, Baekhyun could still spot that gorgeous, astounding blush colouring your cheeks. He really grew to love it; to make you so flustered you couldn't help but grow all red, just for him. “What do you think?” he asked quietly, still observing you with a small lopsided smile.

First you looked at your connected hands in your lap and then looked up at him through your lashes. “Depends what it is, but I owe you, so…” you trailed off.

He chuckled quietly, causing your heart to skip a beat before he started driving again, the line in front slowly moving. “Wonderful.”

Within forty-five minutes, you found yourself seated in a Korean restaurant, both yours and Baekhyun's shoes left at the entrance. Baekhyun, knowing the owner, asked for a separate room where people usually held business dinners, to ensure you would have full privacy and could enjoy each other.

It was a bit mind-blowing how much he could just do. His authority was admirable but at the same time it reminded you how you could hardly compare. If you would have asked the owner to give you a separate room, you might have had to fight for it or give him some money. Baekhyun seemed to walk in like a prince, confidently talking to people as if it was so natural.

“Can you give me a moment?” he asked suddenly, already standing up. “I forgot something in the car. Choose a meal until then.”

You nodded and saw him shuffling towards the door. Quickly going through the menu, you were thankful it was just an ordinary Korean restaurant that specializes in noodle soups and wasn't pricey. Picking the one that seemed the most special, you put the menu away just in time for Baekhyun to return back. His right hand was behind his back, obviously hiding something.

He had a sheepish smile on his face as he stepped towards you and handed you a beautiful bouquet of colourful flowers, the smell of which instantly hit your nose. You felt your mouth stretch into a wide smile as you stood up to your feet.

“Oh my god, what is this for, Baekhyun?” you asked, looking up into his eyes just to find them sparkling with anticipation.

“I know I never asked you out on an official date, so I might not be dressed up to my best potential, but I really wanted to give you something and today, as I said, I wanted to give you a bouquet. Please, accept it,” he added breathily, watching you with bated breath, nudging the flowers out to you.

You giggled and he smiled right away as you took the bouquet in your hand, careful as to not hold his fingers that were still curled around the stems. “Thank you.”

As you wanted to pull back, he leaned in, grabbing your wrist gently that was holding the flowers, bringing you closer. His lips hovered over your cheek and he eventually pressed them there. “Good job on your first cover,” he murmured and leaned away the slightest to watch your surprised reaction. Your eyes were watching his mouth and he had to restrain himself from going any further. He didn't want to cross the line. Not yet.

Unfortunately, you had to separate when the doors opened and the waiter came in. She was taken aback for the slightest of moments when she noticed you and Baekhyun backing away from each other but both of you recovered quickly and sat down, ready to order.

“This Vietnamese noodle soup is my favourite,” mentioned Baekhyun, looking at you. “So that is your gift to me - eating my favorite food with me.”

…

It was late June, the beginning of the most humid weeks of the year with the monsoon season around the corner.

Baekhyun became so busy with the release of his album back in May, that you rarely got to see him afterwards, although he made sure to see you a couple of times per week even if he was on the verge of falling asleep. Besides meeting, you were always chatting on the phone, him updating you about his daily schedules while you would mostly talk and send pictures about the same old stuff - your office, your computer screen or your late lunch. Or a selfie. You were on that basis now, despite a first kiss never happening.

It made you think sometimes if you were the one who was supposed to make the first move. If you grew eager to finally feel him in that way, then he must have also had some similar feelings, right? You had been dying to kiss him since the first time he said he liked you. And it was late June now.

Late June meant that the music awards show was happening just this particular night. Baekhyun had been texting you eager messages to double-check that you would really be attending like you told him you would.

While you quickly looked yourself over in the mirror in your office - you worked even today, a Saturday - you checked your phone's screen, seeing the previews of his messages.

Waiter: finally our schedules overlap ❤️ Waiter: i cant actually believe it  Waiter: huhuhuhu missy are you done with preparing? im curious to see.... Waiter: its just that it would be difficult to do so without it…

Hastily checking your earrings, you read the previews with a large smile. It would be an exciting night.

When you arrived at the event along with your colleagues, you couldn't help feeling clammy from the excitement. The possibility of spotting Baekhyun was making you sick with anticipation. It wasn't even the amount of people attending the event, it was just him; just the idea that he was somewhere there and hopefully he was looking for you just like you were looking for him.

Your colleagues hurried to sit down as the ceremony was about to start. Since you were busy in the office, you ended up leaving the headquarters much later than planned, but there was nothing you could do about it anymore.

The lights dimmed just when you made yourself comfortable, making it too difficult to look around and recognize faces. Deciding to quickly check the messages you didn't have time to look at before, you finally saw what Baekhyun was bombarding you so much about.

Waiter: finally our schedules overlap Waiter: i cant actually believe it Waiter: huhuhuhu missy are you done with preparing? im curious to see how you look so you could send me a selfie and so then i can recognize you at the event hm? without having to stare everywhere and become suspicious Waiter: its just that it would be difficult to do so without it sooooo ????? Waiter: yah!! where did you go?? Waiter: ex...excuse me? ehm ehm!!! Waiter: wow okay… Waiter: Y/N … disappeared... Waiter: i guess you are busy >< im arriving at the venue soon update me so i know where you attttttt okiiii??? ㅎㅅㅎ

You hid your smile behind your hand and quickly typed him a message to update him like he demanded. You couldn't send a selfie anymore because of the silly lights and your superiors being at the same table, you couldn't afford to be on your phone all the time. Hyeri, as much as she was kind, didn't like it when the job was not done properly, so you made sure to pay attention to the performances while you felt your phone vibrate with messages most probably from Baekhyun.

You bit your lip to keep in the smile, your heart fluttering. How was he able to be this… gorgeous even through messages? How was he able to make your heart beat frantically even when he was not around you? Unknowingly, your desire for him grew by tenfold, the sudden urge to meet him almost overtaking your actions, but one strict stare from Hyeri and you stopped squirming in your chair as you realized you did with a horrified look. Wow. You had to do something about this, and it had to be very soon.

To your big misfortune, you never spotted Baekhyun until it was his turn to overtake the stage. As much as you expected something huge, it was anything but that. No props, just a simple mic stand and then, a Baekhyun in a ready-to-go-for-a-date look, plus four dancers and he was able to fill the huge stage to the brim with his presence. That was it. Simple as that.

You inhaled his entire performance, the loud screamings of crazy fans not enough to pull you out of your reverie that consisted of Byun Baekhyun and Byun Baekhyun only. His movements, so sharp yet so smooth, his flirting with the camera, his lip bites, and that crazy happy smile; all of it. He was changing images from lethal sexy, through lazily suggestive, then sweetly gorgeous until becoming cute and ready to pet on the head. Without anything more to add, he had each flavor of a candy to offer and you had never been this addicted to candies in your life.

...

You met him accidentally when you were leaving the toilets that were meant for the VIPs. Closing the door behind you, you felt its cold surface press to your bare back when Baekyun appeared in front of you, freezing momentarily when he recognized you.

He smiled instantly, happy to finally see you, before he let his eyes wander. Finally, he let you know that he was looking. Oh he was. Your dress was revealing on the back, which he had yet to witness, but the front was completely covered, hugging your chest and waist, telling Baekhyun that there was something to look at for sure. The long, wavy skirt that stopped just above the floor was bunched up in your hand, showing sparkly high-heeled shoes that were the cause of the pain in your ankles.

None of you said a word as you took a note of his fancy suit, the simple stage outfit now gone. It was fully black, but once again you couldn't comprehend how broad his shoulders and chest were despite his shirt that was tucked into his pants being black, too.

“Good performance,” you broke the silence finally, meeting his somewhat eager gaze. “I have to admit, I was swooning with the other girls, too.”

That got Baekhyun's attention. His eyebrow rose in question and he stepped closer but not before making sure there were no prying eyes in the small corridor. His body covered yours from anyone, were you to be disturbed. “Oh, were you, really?”

You nodded, your smile teasing. “Yeah.”

He smiled gently, his gaze running over your features that were touched up with make-up. “I'm glad. If I wanted to impress someone, it was you.”

“You did that a long time ago,” you admitted shyly, averting your eyes so he wouldn't catch you shyness.

You heard him letting out a laugh through his nose. “So cute,” he muttered, stepping even closer. “I have to run back but let me drive you home tonight.”

His words made your head snap up though you weren't that much smaller from him anymore thanks to the heels. His words ignited something inside of you. “You came with your car?”

“I asked my friend to bring it over to the venue,” he said. “I am not going back to my company after this. I finally found you here and-” he sighed softly, shaking his head as he looked at you, “I want to spend some time with you. Alone.”

Your breath hitched in your throat, his look making you all itchy and needy. Without much thinking, you found yourself nodding a tad too eagerly which made Baekhyun smile. “Alright,” you whispered, “text me. But I can't leave before my superiors do.”

“Can I just steal you?”

Giggling, you shook your head and suppressed the need to hold his hand. “I'm afraid no. But I will try my best to get out of it quickly.”

His smile was so gentle as he nodded slowly, closing his eyes for a second before stepping even closer, his fingertips running over your clothed forearm in the most feather-like way. “Okay. I'll be waiting for you,” sweetheart.

…

The car came to a complete stop in front of your small apartment building. Audi had quite the silent engine anyway, but now with it being turned off, you felt like silence had a physical form and was growing in on you, making the tension between you and Baekhyun the more difficult to withstand.

Given his silence, you knew that you should say something, and you also knew what you were supposed to do. It was now or never. “Would you maybe… like to come in?”

He glanced over, checking your expression to see if you were serious. He parted his lips but hesitation stole the words away from him. You chuckled when he opened his mouth again and smiled abashedly. “'I’d love to.”

Oh my god, you thought as the both of you made your way towards your apartment. In panic, you tried to quickly think over what state you left your flat in exactly, but it seemed that your mind was clogged up, unable to come up with anything that could possibly explain what was happening in that very moment. Byun Baekhyun, the superstar, was coming inside your apartment. And he seemed to be rather quiet.

Was he overthinking this? Maybe he would realise this was all a mistake and that you weren't good enough for him. Maybe you did something off-putting today?

As you were typing in the code to your house, you felt his strong presence behind you, his gaze on your naked back, and you swore the tension just grew even more when you let him enter your little safety den first. Surely, it was no luxury like he must have been used to by then, given the many years of singing career, but you could only hope it would be enough.

You had been far too gone for him. If he were to dump you, you might end up hurt and heartbroken. 

Letting the door close behind you, you wanted to follow him only to see him standing just a couple of steps ahead of you, looking into the apartment but not moving further inside. “You can enter, Baekyhun.”

“You look so beautiful tonight,” he said softly out of nowhere, catching you off guard with his honest words. Letting them sink in, you bit your lip, feeling your heartbeat accelerate again. It wasn't possible to get a heart attack, right? 

He was standing in front of you while your back was pressed to the front door you just closed behind you. “Thank you,” you whispered, matching his intimate tone and feeling like you were about to combust. “You look really handsome tonight.” And everyday.

He smiled, which you couldn't see as he still had his back on you. Just then, he turned and with that pleasant expression on his face made those separating two steps towards you until he stood right in front of you, causing you to look up. “Thank you.”

You nodded, feeling the terrible blush creeping up into your cheeks. Actually your entire body was suddenly on a heat wave, feeling the prickles of sweat to form under your dress as he stared at you affectionately. God, you wanted him so much it was really becoming unbearable.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“You just asked one,” you replied mischievously, grinning, just to be rewarded with a wide smile from him as he stepped even closer, your heart clenching painfully. Was it the chemistry that was so painful?

“Cheeky,” he whispered, his breath almost hitting your cheek. You kept his eye contact before you nudged him with a go on.

What, do you want to kiss me on the cheek again? you desperately wanted to ask, to tease him. Or would this finally be it? Would he finally just... kiss you? 

“May I kiss you, sweetheart. On the lips.” His intonation was far from that of a question. He was so hot, goodness. And your knees were suddenly jelly-like as you couldn’t stop staring into his eyes when you nodded.

He let out a breathy laugh when he almost pressed his body into yours. Almost. “You don’t like to confirm things out loud with me, do you, beauty?”

“Yes, you may kiss me, Baekhyun. Please, just finally kiss me.”

It was almost as if he wouldn't wait for your approval anyway, as he was leaning in before your words even left your mouth, his hands coming to gently rest against the door; caging you in, yet making you feel even more safe. He was carefully watching your features as he pressed his lips to yours, one hand coming to cradle your face gently before he finally captured your upper lip and you melted. 

Closing your eyes, you sighed as you let your hands slide up his toned chest and around his neck when he pressed himself into you just a little bit closer, a very much satisfied hum coming out of his throat that sent shock waves down your body. That deadly hum. It could really do anything to you, it was that attractive to you.

You dared to run your fingers through his hair that had gel in it, but still felt so cutely soft under your touch. You played with his pillows, prolonging the gentle sucking as you dragged his lower lip towards you, feeling the wetness of his mouth. He leaned in as you separated for the slightest of moments, tilting his head to the other side, unconsciously making one step closer so you felt him on your chest and the surface of the door on your back.

Smooch after smooch, you soon realized he was a loud kisser that liked the licking sounds and the responses from you as you breathed out softly while his thumb caressed your blushed cheek.

Another loud smooch, and this time he was the one who dragged your lower lip towards him with his teeth, as he bumped his nose with yours, tilting his head to the opposite side again while both of his hands cradled your face with utmost care.

Eventually, he kissed you one last time, ending it with him pressing his forehead to yours, not opening his eyes just yet. You didn’t either, relishing in the lingering feeling of him around your mouth as his warm pants pushed in through your parted lips. Slowly, he nuzzled your nose and you giggled softly which prompted him to open his eyes to meet yours already on him.

“That was better than I could ever imagine,” he whispered and smiled handsomely.

You blushed even more, if that was possible. “Ditto.”

His eyes widened and he leaned away a bit. “Don’t tell me you fantasized about kissing me?”

You shrugged but didn’t meet his eye. “How could I not? I’m a human, aren’t I? And you know I like to be straightforward.”

He smirked, knowingly nodding to himself. “Oh yeah, right. The straightforward business.”

You chuckled. “You’re too good of a kisser.”

“Only the best for you,” he winked and those words made you feel things. Before you could reply, he blurted: “Can I be your boyfriend?”

Smiling widely, you nodded, feeling absolutely elated. This was really happening. “Yes, you can be my boyfriend, Baekhyun.”

He sweeped you in his arms, bringing you in for another kiss. “That means,” he murmured between the kisses, “that I can kiss you just like that. And I can finally call you sweetheart,” he breathed the nickname before opening his mouth and devouring you, showing how passionate of a kisser he could be.

You never doubted him, of course, but in situations like these, reality was always better than your poor imagination, for your brain could never produce the exceptional feeling of having Byun Baekhyun’s lips on yours, feeling the moisture and his playful tongue, his creativity of teasing you with it astonishing. No. Nothing could ever compare.

There was only one Byun Baekhyun and he was a superstar. Off-limits to almost everyone. But not to you. Not anymore.

--- --- --- --- ---

A/N: And that is the end! This is the final part, so with this, I am also saying goodbye to this story that made my heart flutter a wee bit... ^^ Thank you to whomever sent me support via comments/reblogs, dms, I was glad this story could bring something enjoyable to the table! ❤   

--- As you know, these 3 chapters were supposed to be about how our characters met and became a couple. So I hope I delivered well! I know I put the M sign in the beginning way back in May, but while plotting, I realized it wasnt suitable for these 3 parts. It would take me more chapters to write to bring it to that point (hint: if you request it as a standalone oneshot later, I am willing to write it but otherwise it would need more relationship building). 

I hope this explains it! 

Thank you again!

Please let me know what you thought, it would mean a lot and its free!

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