#yes with was sent exactly a month ago
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Hey Sarita
☆ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it's time to spread positivity!
thank you <3 <3 <3 🥺
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more than a month after my previous kotor update i am happy to announce that i have finally met jolee and had him join me <3
#el plays kotor#yes im still on kashyyyk dont look at me#i was distracted by other games for a sec lmao but sth made me return to kotor yesterday#and now the party is complete!!!#and i have found 3 star maps and the plot is thickening!!!!#i keep wondering. if i hadn't been spoiled abt the pc's true identity would i have pieced it together by now#bc the foreshadowing isn't exactly subtle#or maybe it just feels unsubtle to me precisely because i know what is being foreshadowed....#but like. from the very beginning carth is like hmm its kinda sus that you happened to be on the endar spire#and then all those conversations with bastila that make u go hmmmm what's that supposed to mean#and then... when getting the star map on kashyyyk the hologram says sth abt you matching the required behavioral patterns or whatev#and that the last time it was used was five years ago And you can reply with 'hey revan was in these parts five years ago right'#like!!! yeah!!!! it was me!!!! i was the last user five years ago thats why i match the pattern i am revannnnnnnn#i have to know. did the first kotor players back in 2003 figure it out by this point hngngngnhng#or like any other players after 2003 who played and managed to avoid spoilers#anyway back to jolee. he is so cool but also so squishy on god#apparently some ppl give him a blaster to keep him out of melee but like you cant give a blaster to a jedi..... so uncivilized.......#i set him to use force powers until he runs out of force points#but the moment he runs out of force points and jumps into the fray he goes down. sigh#maybe im doing something wrong again. maybe i should let go of my jedi pride and just give him a blaster#i should also probably use all those energy shields and battle stimulants i have hoarded. i keep forgetting abt them lmao#also!!! @ the mutual who sent me that kotor related ask also more than a month ago i just wanted to let u kno. i have replied to it#i mean if u missed it or if u didnt get a notif or forgot or anything else that's cool !!#i just get all worried that ppl might think i havent answered and that im ignoring them if they dont indicate they've seen the reply gfhgfh#but that's a me issue. i just wanted to make sure u knew 🫶#anyway!! next stop manaan maybe#but first a detour to tatooine to deal with mission's useless deadbeat brother
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Mob Bucky respects your own financial independence, but he also made sure you have access to his black card and use it when you need it. He doesn't care what you spend the money on, especially since the notification he gets those very rare times that you use his money is to buy something most practical or for your shared apartment.
However, he does not expect to see a notification for the purchase of some sex toys 😏
CHOCOLATE
Collection: DEVOUR Characters/Pairings: Mob Boss!James Buchanan Barnes x Female!Chef!Reader Word Count: 5.6k Timeline: Takes place 1-2 weeks after mint, 2-3 weeks after heat.
Content & Warnings: EXPLICIT SMUT - vaginal fingering, unprotected vaginal intercourse, creampie, food play, breeding kink. Feelings, so many feelings.
Author Notes: Surprise! At some points during the 2200 Followers Celebration poll, Devour Bucky and Chef were actually winning, so here's something I started months and months ago and brought out to finish for them. It's not quite everything from your ask, Eva, but I hope it's a satisfying scenario all the same...
↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
You had known the exact moment your fiancé – mob boss, venture capitalist, or philanthropist depending on who you asked and what they knew – got the notification of your purchase.
James Buchanan Barnes had given you a black card weeks ago, before the engagement, but you hadn’t used it until this week. Bucky had gone to Chicago for business (and you were sure he was there for business as well), and instead of staying home and pining away for him, you decided to treat yourself. The notification must have pinged his phone during a meeting, because exactly 47 minutes later, your own phone lit up with his name.
"What's this Cartier expense I see?" his voice a dangerous mix of amusement and curiosity.
You swallowed hard, fingering the velvet box in your lap. "Just a little shopping therapy while you're away. Nothing to worry about."
"Mmm," he hummed, unconvinced. "And here I thought I was the one who was supposed to shower you with gifts."
"Well," you said, "maybe I wanted to surprise you for once."
There was a pause, and you could almost see him leaning back in his chair, a predatory smile spreading across his face. "I suppose I am a little surprised you finally used the card. But how about a challenge?”
“What do you have in mind?”
“Why don’t you see if you can shock me with a purchase?”
“Challenge accepted. What do I get?”
He chuckled. “You already know I’ll give you the world.”
Butterflies surged in your stomach. This man.
“You’re back Saturday afternoon?” you confirmed.
“Yes,” he growled. “There’s a round of golf I can’t seem to move or negotiate.”
You sighed softly. “It’s only three more days.”
“I like that you miss me.”
You huffed but couldn’t deny it.
“I’m missing you, too,” he said.
“James…” you breathed.
“Did you get the gift I sent?”
“I did.” A stunning, six-foot mirror with an ornate, gold-gilded frame had been delivered that morning to your apartment and placed in your bedroom.
“I was taken with how beautiful it was and you were my first thought.”
Your heart skipped a beat. “I love you,” you said.
“I love you, too. I have to go. We’ll talk later.”
When you woke up Friday morning, you knew exactly how to shock him with the black card.
Or at least tease him.
The high-end, ridiculously expensive lingerie boutique you never thought you would enter in your lifetime - Boudoir.
The response to that expense notification was immediate, and you smirked when you read the text that came through.
JAMES: You have my interest piqued.
You thought for a moment, then typed out a reply.
YOU: Thought maybe I’d see if I can shock you and send some photos of what I got later tonight.
Three dots appeared straight away, and then
JAMES: Forget photos, I’ll fly out tonight straight away after my meeting with Levinson and come straight to you.
Your breath caught in your throat, heart swelling with adoration, anticipation, and maybe just a touch of nerves. You looked up the latest flights out of Chicago, and couldn’t help feeling a little forlorn. Even though the restaurant head chef life meant late nights for work, it would still be an ungodly hour when he landed.
YOU: I’ll try to stay up, but promise to wake me up if I’m asleep?
Again, you didn't have to wait long for his reply.
JAMES: I promise. Nothing could keep me from you tonight.
A shiver ran down your spine at his words. You glanced at the clock - it was barely noon. The hours until his arrival stretched before you, filled with anticipation and nervous energy. You busied yourself with things before work, trying to focus on anything other than the ticking clock and the bag from Boudoir sitting in your closet.
At Devour your mind was engaged fully in your craft and working with your team.
But once you returned home after the Friday night dinner service, you found yourself pacing the apartment, unable to settle. Should you put on the lingerie now? Wait until you heard from him? You compromised by showering and doing your hair and makeup, then slipping into a silky robe.
Just as you were debating whether to pour yourself a glass of wine to calm your nerves, your phone pinged.
JAMES: Landed. On my way to you.
Far earlier than you expected him, but a good thing, too.
Your heart raced as you read his message. You quickly made your way to the bedroom, retrieving the Boudoir bag from the closet with trembling hands. The delicate lace and silk felt cool against your skin as you slipped into the lingerie, adjusting the straps and garters with care. You stood before the new mirror James had sent, admiring how the deep, rich color complemented your skin tone. The set hugged your curves in all the right places. Standing before the mirror James had gifted you, you couldn’t help but feel a surge of confidence.
A text alert broke your reverie.
JAMES: Five minutes.
You took a deep breath, smoothing your hands over the silky fabric once more before draping the robe back over your shoulders. You dimmed the lights in the bedroom and lit a few candles, creating a soft, inviting ambiance.
The sound of a key in the lock made your pulse quicken. You perched on the edge of the bed, listening as Bucky’s footsteps approached.
The bedroom door opened slowly, and he stepped inside, his eyes immediately locking onto yours. His gaze was intense, a mix of hunger and adoration that made your breath catch in your throat. Would you ever get used to the way he looked at you?
"Well," he said, his voice low and gravelly, "this is certainly a welcome home."
You stood, your fingers toying with the tie of your robe. "I thought you might appreciate a little preview of my shopping spree."
He set a golden box on your dresser and then moved closer, his steps deliberate and predatory. He reached out, running his fingers along the edge of your robe. "May I?"
You nodded, your heart racing as he slowly undid the tie and pushed the silky fabric off your shoulders. The robe pooled at your feet, leaving you standing before him in the exquisite lingerie.
Bucky inhaled sharply, his eyes roaming over every inch of you. "Beautiful.” His hands settled on your waist, pulling you flush against him. "Show me how much you missed me," he growled.
You leaned into him, tilting your head up to meet his intense gaze. "I thought you were going to show me how much you missed me," you teased, running your hands up his chest and over his shoulders.
He chuckled, a low, dangerous sound that sent shivers down your spine. "Oh, I intend to," he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear. "But first, I want to savor this moment. You've outdone yourself."
His hands roamed over the delicate lace and silk, tracing the curves of your body with a reverence that made your breath hitch. You could feel the heat of his skin through his shirt, the barely contained power in his muscles as he held you close.
“I thought you wouldn’t be here until much, much later,” you said, breathing in the scent of him, cologne mingled with his natural musk. “The flights I saw had landings after midnight.”
He snorted. “My private jet provides service according to my schedule, not anyone else’s.”
“Oh,” was your soft and surprised reaction, realizing you should not be at all surprised to learn he owned a private jet.
"Turn around, love," he commanded softly. "Let me see all of you."
You complied, slowly spinning to face the mirror. He stood behind you, his eyes meeting yours in the reflection. His hands skimmed down your sides, fingertips tracing the lace edges of your lingerie. You shivered at his touch, watching as his expression darkened with desire.
"Do you see how stunning you are?" he murmured, his lips brushing against your neck. "How every curve, every line of your body is a work of art?"
You leaned back against his chest, feeling the solid warmth of him. "I see how you look at me," you whispered. "That's what makes me feel beautiful."
You watched in the mirror as his lips trailed up your neck, his stubble scratching deliciously against your skin. Your breath quickened as one of his hands splayed across your stomach, pulling you back against him.
He growled low in his throat, his arms tightening around you. "You still have no idea what you do to me," he said, his voice rough with need. His fingers traced the edge of the lace at your hip.
You turned in his arms, reaching up to cup his face. "Then show me," you challenged, your eyes locked on his.
Impossibly, his eyes darkened even more at your words, a predatory smile curving his lips. In one fluid motion, he lifted you, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist. His lips crashed against yours in a searing kiss as he carried you to the bed, laying you down with surprising gentleness.
"You want me to show you?" he growled, hovering over you. His fingers traced the delicate straps of your lingerie, sending shivers across your skin. "I'll show you exactly what you do to me."
He began a torturous exploration of your body, his lips and hands mapping every inch of you. The exquisite lingerie became both a barrier and a tantalizing tease as Bucky lavished attention on the exposed skin while skimming over the lace and silk. You arched into his touch, desperate for more.
"James," you breathed, your fingers threading through his hair. "Please…"
He chuckled against your skin, the vibration sending sparks of pleasure through you. "Patience, love. I've been dreaming of you all week."
His talented fingers deftly unclasped the delicate hooks of your bra, slowly peeling the lace away to reveal your skin beneath. You gasped as the cool air hit your heated flesh, arching into his touch as he palmed your breasts.
"Beautiful," he murmured, lowering his head to trail kisses along your collarbone. "So fucking beautiful."
You tugged at his shirt, suddenly desperate to feel his skin against yours. "Too many clothes," you panted, fumbling with the buttons.
Bucky chuckled, sitting back on his heels to shrug off his jacket and unbutton his shirt. Your eyes roamed hungrily over his sculpted torso as more of his skin was revealed. The dim candlelight cast shadows that accentuated every plane and angle of his muscular form.
"Like what you see?" he teased, a knowing smirk playing on his lips.
"Always," you breathed, reaching up to run your hands over his chest and shoulders.
He caught your wrists gently, pinning them above your head as he leaned down to capture your lips in a searing kiss.
You melted into his kiss, your body arching up to meet his as he pressed you into the mattress. The weight of him, the heat of his skin against yours, was intoxicating. You tugged at his grip on your wrists, desperate to touch him, but he held firm.
"Ah ah," he murmured against your lips. "I'm not done admiring my gift yet."
His free hand skimmed down your side, fingers dancing along the edge of your panties. You whimpered, hips bucking involuntarily as he teased you.
"James, please," you gasped, breaking away from the kiss.
He chuckled, a dark, velvety sound that sent shivers down your spine. "So impatient," he tsked, nipping at your lower lip. "But I suppose I have kept you waiting all week, haven't I?"
In one fluid motion, he released your wrists and moved down your body. His lips and tongue traced a burning path along your skin, pausing to lavish attention on your breasts before continuing lower.
With deft movements, he removed the rest of your lingerie, his eyes dark with hunger as he drank in the sight of you. You reached for his belt, fumbling with the buckle in your eagerness. Bucky chuckled, gently moving your hands aside to finish undressing himself.
Finally skin to skin, you both sighed at the contact. Bucky's weight settled over you, comforting and electrifying all at once. His lips found yours again as he entered you slowly, savoring every inch. You gasped against his mouth, your body arching to take him deeper.
"God, I've missed you," Bucky growled, his forehead pressed against yours as he stilled for a moment.
You wrapped your legs around his waist, urging him closer. "Show me," you breathed, nails raking down his back.
That was all the encouragement he needed. Bucky began to move, setting a rhythm that had you clinging to him, gasping his name. His lips found your neck, kissing and nipping at the sensitive skin there as his hips drove into yours.
You lost yourself in the sensations - the slide of his skin against yours, the delicious friction where your bodies joined, the heat of his breath on your neck. Your hands roamed his broad back, feeling the flex and ripple of his muscles as he moved above you.
"James," you moaned, feeling the familiar tension building low in your belly. "I'm close."
Bucky slowed his movements, a wicked grin spreading across his face. "Not yet," he murmured, his voice husky with desire. "I'm not done with you."
With a low growl, he suddenly withdrew, leaving you gasping at the loss. Before you could protest, his strong hands grasped your hips and flipped you onto your stomach.
His palms glided down your sides, fingertips tracing the curve of your spine. You shivered at his touch, anticipation building as he gently urged your hips upward.
"On your knees for me, beautiful," he commanded softly, his palms smoothing over the swell of your backside.
You complied eagerly, pushing yourself up onto all fours. The cool air of the room kissed your heated skin, making you hyper-aware of every sensation. Bucky's hands continued their journey, kneading the flesh of your thighs and hips with intent appreciation.
You felt the bed shift as he positioned himself behind you, the heat of his body radiating against your back. His fingers tangled in your hair, gently tugging your head back. His lips brushed against your ear as he spoke.
"You're a vision like this," he murmured, his breath hot against your skin. "So perfect for me."
You whimpered, pressing back against him, desperate for more contact. Bucky chuckled, the sound vibrating through your body. Slowly, torturously, he dragged the tip of his length along your folds, teasing your clit with the blunt head of his cock.
You gasped at the sensation, your fingers curling into the sheets. "James, please," you whimpered, pushing back against him.
He groaned, his grip on your hips tightening. "So eager for me," he murmured, positioning himself at your entrance. "Tell me what you want."
"You," you breathed, looking back over your shoulder to meet his intense gaze. "I want you, James. Please."
With a low growl, he pushed into you in one smooth thrust, filling you completely. You both moaned at the sensation, savoring the feeling of being joined once again. Bucky stilled for a moment, his forehead resting against your back as he struggled to maintain control.
"God, you feel amazing," he groaned, pressing a kiss between your shoulder blades. "So tight, so wet, so warm and perfect for me."
He began to move, setting a slow, deep rhythm that had you gasping with each thrust. Your fingers clutched at the sheets, desperate for something to anchor you as waves of pleasure washed over you. Bucky's hands roamed your body, caressing and squeezing, leaving trails of fire in their wake.
"Look,” he said, and turned your head to take in the sight of you two in the mirror.
You locked your eyes on his through the reflection. “Need you to see how gorgeous you are when you come apart for me.”
You keened for him as he pulled you back on his cock with a particularly demanding thrust.
“When I breed you.”
You gasped.
He groaned and curled his body down over your back.
Because you also clenched powerfully around his cock.
“Mmm, you like that,” he murmured right into your ear, then licked the shell of it. “Want to be bred,” he continued, pace unyielding as he split you open with his cock. “Not as much as I want to fill you up with my seed,” another thrust, “until you’re growing with my child,” another thrust, “no question who you belong to,” thrust, “that you’re claimed,” thrust, “that you’re mine.”
You were utterly breathless for a moment, and he registered that, too, just as he registers every movement, every reaction.
He continued to thrust slowly in and out of your leaking cunt, but he noticed you were no longer fluid and pliant, but that you had tensed up. He stopped. “What’s going on in your beautiful head?”
You bit your lip, and your head dropped down, turning away from his direct gaze in the mirror.
He pulled out and laid on his side next to you.
“Talk to me,” he said, and you weren’t sure if this tone was commanding or pleading, but it was certainly serious.
You sat up, folded your hands in your lap and took a deep breath. As steadily as you could, you said, “You knew my measurements and had sent a perfect wardrobe of intimates to me withing twenty-four hours of our first encounter.”
He nodded, his lips quirking up at the corner.
“So, I assume you also know I have an IUD, and that you that knew before you fucked me in the kitchen that first night at the restaurant.”
“Yes,” he confirmed.
“I’m nowhere near ready to think about children.”
He leaned up on one elbow and reached for your hands, smoothing his thumb back and forth over your knuckles. “We have as much time to think about that as you want.”
You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. Your eyes searched his. You could see he wasn’t merely trying to tell you what you wanted to hear - he never had.
“I look forward to children with you one day, but I’m in no rush. When I imagined settling down with a wife,” he continued, “I didn’t think it would be for another five or six years, but once I found you, there was no question that I wanted you.”
"I want that future with you too, just... not quite yet."
Bucky sat up, cupping your face in his hands. His thumbs stroked your cheeks gently as he looked into your eyes. "I'm sorry if I scared you," he said, his voice low and sincere. "Sometimes I get carried away in the moment. You inspire that in me. But I never want you to feel uncomfortable or trapped.”
You felt a wave of relief wash over you, your body relaxing as you processed his words. "I'm sorry," you murmured, leaning into his touch. "I didn't mean to kill the mood."
Bucky shook his head, pulling you closer. "Don't apologize. Communication is important, especially about something like this." His fingers traced soothing patterns on your skin.
You nodded, feeling a surge of warmth and affection for this man who could be so commanding and intense one moment, and so tender and understanding the next. "I love you," you said softly, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to his lips.
Bucky responded eagerly, his arms wrapping around you as he deepened the kiss. When you finally parted, both slightly breathless, he rested his forehead against yours. "I love you too," he murmured. "More than I ever thought possible."
His hands began to roam your body again, easily reigniting the need in both of your for each other.
You broke off the kiss briefly, "Just so we're clearly communicating, breeding kink? Yes. Children yet? No."
"Noted," he laughed, and returned to devouring your lips.
Bucky shifted his position from sitting to kneeling, settling back on his heels, then with one fluid motion he turned you and pulled you into his lap with your thighs falling on either side of his into a wide, kneeling position. He lifted your hips, then lined up his cock with your entrance, and brought you down again on his length. He guided your hips until you were impaled all the way down. The new angle sent sparks of pleasure through your body, drawing a low moan from your lips.
He banded his left arm around your torso, and his right hand smoothed up your sternum, between your breasts, coming to rest in a secure hold on your shoulder. You closed your eyes, focusing on nothing but the feel of him inside you, behind you, right at your back, every inch of your bodies pressed together. Your left hand traced over his forearm, then tangled with his fingers around your waist, your other hand moving back to anchor yourself on his hip. He pressed a hot, open-mouthed kiss to your shoulder, then began thrusting. Each thrust seemed to push a deep moan out of you for him, and you didn’t hold back.
"Open your eyes," he commanded softly, his breath hot against your ear. "Look at us."
You obeyed, your gaze meeting his in the reflection of the mirror. The sight before you was breathtaking. Bucky sat tall and powerful behind you, his muscular thighs flexed as he supported your weight. Your body was on full display, skin flushed and glistening with a fine sheen of sweat. His thick arm across your stomach, holding you close against his chest.
"Do you see how beautiful you are?" he murmured, his lips brushing against your neck. "How perfectly you fit with me?"
You watched in the mirror as one of his hands slowly trailed up your body, cupping your breast and teasing the sensitive peak. Your back arched at his touch, pressing you further onto his cock.
Bucky groaned, his hips bucking upwards involuntarily. "That's it," he breathed, his voice rough with desire. "Feel me inside you."
Entranced by his words and the intoxicating view in the mirror, you began to move. You rolled your hips, grinding down onto him in a slow, sensual rhythm. Bucky's hands guided your movements, his fingers digging into your flesh as he helped you ride him.
You watched in fascination as your bodies moved together, mesmerized by the play of muscles beneath Bucky's skin and the way your own body responded to his touch. The sight of him disappearing inside you with each downward motion was almost too much to bear.
"James," you gasped, your head falling back onto his shoulder as the pleasure built. "Oh god, James..."
“No,” he growled, and his hand went up to your neck, taking you by the throat, not aggressive, but commanding, making it clear that he wanted you to keep looking in the mirror. “I won’t let you fucking miss this.”
It occurred to you then that this handsome, audacious bastard, the fiancé who you’d given your heart to, knew exactly what he wanted when he sent you this mirror and had it placed in the exact spot in front of you now.
He wanted this.
He wanted to see this and have you see this. The debauchery and the devotion while the two of you were intimate together.
Your eyes locked with his in the mirror, the intensity of his gaze pushing you even closer to the brink. You watched as his free hand slid down your body, fingers finding your clit with unerring accuracy. The dual stimulation of his cock inside you and his fingers on your most sensitive area becoming more frantic. Bucky's grip on your hips tightened, guiding you into a faster pace.
"That's it, love," he growled, his voice low and husky in your ear. "Let go for me. I want to see you come undone."
His words, combined with the intense sensations and the erotic sight in the mirror, and touch pushed you over the edge. You cried out, your body tensing and shaking as waves of pleasure washed over you. Bucky held you tightly against him, his hips still moving as he worked you through your orgasm.
"Beautiful," he murmured, pressing kisses along your shoulder and neck. "So fucking beautiful."
As the aftershocks subsided, Bucky gently turned you in his lap so you were facing him. His hands cupped your face, drawing you in for a deep, passionate kiss. You could feel him still hard inside you, and you rocked your hips, drawing a groan from his lips.
"Your turn," you whispered, nipping at his lower lip.
With a growl, Bucky flipped you onto your back, hovering over you with a predatory gleam in his eyes. He hooked one of your legs over his shoulder, changing the angle as he began to thrust into you with renewed vigor.
You gasped at the deeper penetration, your hands clutching at his back as he sunk into you. The room filled with the sounds of your moans, heavy breaths, and the slap of skin on skin.
You reached up, pulling him down for a passionate kiss while he worked up to a relentless pace. He drove into you with powerful thrusts, each one pushing the air from your lungs. Your other leg wrapped around his waist, urging him deeper as you felt another orgasm building.
"James," you panted, your nails raking down his back, "I'm so close again."
He growled, his hips snapping against yours with increased fervor. "My good girl, I’ll always give you what you need."
His hand snaked between your bodies, fingers finding your oversensitive clit. The added stimulation was almost too much, pushing you right to the edge. You cried out, your body arching off the bed as your second orgasm crashed over you.
Bucky's rhythm faltered as your walls clenched around him. With a deep groan, he buried himself to the hilt inside you, his body shuddering as he found his own release. You felt the warmth of his seed spilling inside you, prolonging your own pleasure.
For a moment, you both lay there, panting and trembling in the aftermath. Bucky's weight was comforting on top of you, grounding you as you floated in post-orgasmic bliss. He pressed soft kisses to your neck and shoulder, murmuring words of love and praise against your skin.
Eventually, he rolled to the side, pulling you with him so you were tucked against his chest. His arms wrapped around you, holding you close as your breathing slowly returned to normal. You nuzzled into the crook of his neck, inhaling his scent and feeling utterly content.
"I love you," you murmured, pressing a soft kiss to his collarbone.
Bucky's hand stroked up and down your back, his touch soothing and gentle. "I love you too," he replied, his voice deep and warm. "More than I thought possible."
You hummed in agreement, nuzzling into the crook of his neck. The room was quiet save for the sound of your breathing and the faint flicker of the candles.
After a few moments, Bucky spoke again, his voice soft. "I meant what I said earlier. About children, about our future. We have all the time in the world."
You lifted your head to meet his gaze, seeing nothing but sincerity in his eyes. "I know," you said, leaning in to kiss him gently. "Thank you for understanding."
He smiled, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "Always. We're partners in this, in everything."
You lay in comfortable silence again for a while, basking in the afterglow and each other's presence. Bucky's fingers idly traced patterns on your skin, sending pleasant shivers down your spine.
"I missed this," you said softly, breaking the silence. "Having you here, holding me." Everything with him was still relatively so new, but it felt like this was exactly how it always should be.
He hummed in agreement, tightening his arms around you. "Me too. Those nights in Chicago felt endless without you."
You tilted your head up to look at him, a small smile playing on your lips. "Well, you're home now. And you brought me another present, didn’t you?”
“Oh, you noticed that golden box I brought in with me, did you?”
“Yes, can I have it, please?” you asked sweetly, your curiosity thrumming more with each second now that you had remembered it.
He chuckled at your eagerness, pressing a kiss to your forehead before reluctantly disentangling himself from your embrace. "Alright, love. Your wish is my command."
You watched appreciatively as he padded across the room, admiring the play of muscles beneath his skin. He retrieved the golden box from the dresser and returned to the bed, settling beside you with a mischievous glint in his eye.
"Close your eyes," he instructed softly, and you complied, feeling a thrill of anticipation.
You heard the rustle of paper and the soft click of a box opening. A moment later, an intoxicating aroma filled the air - rich, complex, with notes of cocoa, vanilla, and something tantalizingly exotic.
"Open," Bucky murmured.
Parting your lips, you allowed him to place a morsel of chocolate in your mouth.
The chocolate melted slowly on your tongue, releasing layers of flavor that made you moan softly in delight. Rich, dark cocoa mingled with hints of caramel and a subtle spiciness that lingered pleasantly. As the last of it dissolved, you opened your eyes to find Bucky watching you intently, his gaze dark with renewed desire.
"Good?" he asked, his voice low and husky.
You nodded, licking your lips. "Incredible. What is it?"
He smiled, holding up an elegantly crafted golden box. "Amedei Porcelana. Some of the rarest and most expensive chocolate in the world. I had it flown in from Tuscany."
Your eyes widened. "James, that must have cost a fortune."
He shrugged, a playful smirk tugging at his lips. "What's the point of having money if I can't spoil my beautiful fiancée?" His fingers traced along your jawline. "Besides, watching you enjoy it is worth every penny."
You felt a blush creeping up your cheeks at his words and the intensity of his gaze. Bucky leaned in, capturing your lips in a deep, sensual kiss. The lingering taste of chocolate on your tongue mingled with his unique flavor, creating an intoxicating blend. His hand cupped the back of your head, fingers tangling in your hair as he deepened the kiss.
When you finally parted, both slightly breathless, Bucky rested his forehead against yours. "I think I might enjoy that chocolate even more when I taste it on your lips," he murmured, his voice low and husky.
You smiled, reaching for the box. "Well, we have plenty more to sample. Maybe we should conduct a thorough taste test?"
Bucky's eyes darkened with desire, a wicked grin spreading across his face. "I like the way you think, chef."
He took the box from your hands, selecting another piece of chocolate. This time, instead of feeding it to you, he placed it between his teeth, raising an eyebrow in challenge. You leaned in, capturing the other half of the chocolate with your lips, your mouths meeting in a sweet, decadent kiss.
As the night wore on, you continued your playful exploration, alternating between savoring the exquisite chocolate and indulging in each other. Bucky trailed pieces along your skin, following the path with his lips and tongue. You reciprocated, drawing patterns on his sculpted chest and abs with melted chocolate before licking it clean.
The room filled with soft sighs, quiet laughter, and murmured words of affection as you rediscovered each other's bodies. The flickering candlelight cast a warm glow over your intertwined forms, creating an intimate cocoon that seemed to exist outside of time.
As dawn approached, you lay tangled together, satiated and drowsy. Bucky's fingers traced lazy patterns on your back as you rested your head on his chest, listening to the steady thrum of his heartbeat.
"I could get used to welcomes like this," he murmured, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
You hummed contentedly, nuzzling closer. "Maybe I should send you away more often if this is how you come back to me."
He chuckled, the sound rumbling through his chest. "Don't you dare. I much prefer having you by my side every day."
You smiled, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. "Me too," you admitted softly. "Though I have to say, absence does make the heart grow fonder."
"And apparently inspires some very creative shopping," he teased, his hand skimming down your side to rest on your hip.
You laughed, a warm, carefree sound that filled the room. "Well, I had to make sure you'd remember me while you were away."
"Impossible," Bucky murmured, his voice taking on a more serious tone. His fingers traced the curve of your cheek, his touch feather-light but ardent. "You're etched into every part of me now, love."
The intensity of his gaze made your breath catch in your throat. Even after hours of intimacy, he still had the power to make your heart race with just a look. You leaned in, capturing his lips in a tender kiss that spoke volumes of your shared feelings.
As you parted, you noticed the first rays of dawn peeking in through the curtains of your window. You settled your head against his shoulder, and only just registered the press of his lips in a kiss to your forehead before you dropped off to sleep in his arms in the morning light, thoroughly exhausted and thoroughly in love with this man.
↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest
Read more in the DEVOUR collection...
Some of this was content I cut from the final chapter of the original 4-parts of the series (heat) that once I got to the end of that chapter felt like it didn't fit anymore, but it was stuff I couldn't throw away, so I just kept it, knowing it would have a place at some point in their story later, so I'm glad I finally got to share it with you!
I do not do tag lists, but FOLLOW @buckets-and-stories and TURN ON NOTIFICATIONS to be updated any time I publish a new work!
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x reader#mob au#bucky barnes fanfic#female reader#devour au#aspen wrote something#2200 followers celebration#askpen#kink: breeding#kink: food play
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ive been thinking about stone-faced unamused independent reader and how james and barty would absolutely love to baby her and treat her like a princess and she has none of it..until shes feeling sort of down and like she needs their love and support so she gives in and theyre both so shocked and excited theyre like little dogs wagging their tails spinning around her
hiii....I'm back to apologizing to everyone who sent me in requests 2.5+ months ago for me to hoard them until inspiration struck! hope I did it justice hahaha
poly!darksun x black cat!reader and Sirius who just doesn't Get It
CW: fem!reader, reader is maybe a little mean but obviously James and Barty are into that shit, Sirius' POV so a very unreliable narrator
Sirius Black believed himself to be a pretty open-minded person.
He believed that love was love, he staunchly disagreed with blood status and had a lot of respect for muggle-borns, and believed in the fair treatment of beasts and other magical creatures in the Wizarding World.
But no matter how open-minded Sirius believed himself to be, he could not for the life of him figure out how in the hells James Potter and Barty Crouch Junior found their way to you.
Sirius admittedly had a hard enough time finding out that his best friend was dating his semi-estranged little brother’s maniacal (read: bat-shit crazy) best friend, but this?
This made no sense to him.
At least when it came to the likes of Barty Crouch Junior, James had found someone who could rival him in energy and enthusiasm. James could run for seven hours straight at a gods-honest sprint and Barty was just about crazy enough to try as well. Barty never denied his more intrusive thoughts and James was morbidly curious enough to watch those thoughts play out.
And both of them seemed to love hard; even if Sirius didn’t approve of that love, even if he didn’t like that love, he could admit that it, at the very least, made sense for him.
But where James was all golden retriever energy and Barty was some kind deranged, rabid mutt straight from the depths of hell, you….
Well, Sirius wasn’t sure exactly what you were.
Where James was sweet and Barty was enthusiastic, you were utterly unimpressed.
Where James was excitable and Barty was chaotic, you were completely apathetic.
And where James and Barty could be…slightly codependent, you seemed wholly disinterested in having either of them (or anyone for that matter) near you.
“Sod off; I can carry my own damned books.” You had spat at Barty as he tried to take them from you.
And Sirius had to stand there and watch both Barty and James stare after you with a lovesick look adorning their faces as you stalked away from them.
“Well isn’t she just a ray of sunshine?” Sirius muttered derisively, earning him a threatening glare from Barty and a frustrated stare from James.
“You’re one to talk, Pads; I watched Remus actually growl at a first year who tried to take the last pumpkin pastie at dinner last night.” He grumbled before redirecting Barty away from Sirius’ jugular.
And that seemed to be your response to pretty much anything those two did; you elbowed James in the stomach when he held the door open for you like a ‘poncy chauffeur’, you stomped on Barty’s foot when he offered you his elbow on the moving staircase, and you never seemed particularly pleased should they wind up in your vicinity.
Yet…
Yet you never made any effort to actually remove them from your vicinity, nor did you make any effort to leave theirs.
In fact, if Sirius wasn’t mistaken, he was sure he saw your shoulders relax ever so slightly when you realised the people pulling out the chair across from you in the library were James and Barty.
They tensed right back up when Sirius and Peter accompanied them, but that's besides the point.
No, you didn’t converse with any of them. Yes, you completely ignored any attempts at conversation from James or Barty - save taking the opportunity to correct them in their debate about their potions homework. And just once, Sirius was certain he’d heard you whisper a quiet thank you to Barty when he helped you find the page number for the answer to number 47 of your Herbology homework.
It seemed to Sirius that no matter how staunchly you refused to allow either boy to fawn over you, you weren’t completely averse to their company. And though this amount of dedication didn’t exactly surprise Sirius coming from James, seeing as he spent four and half years of his school life pursuing a completely disinterested witch, he was confused that Barty hadn’t gotten bored yet.
It was all very peculiar, Sirius thought.
Even more peculiar was when Barty and James had been snuggling in James’ bed as James quizzed Moony for the upcoming Alchemy test when there was a tentative knock on the dormitory door.
Peter looked up from his Ancient Runes homework to look at Sirius, James and Barty lifted their heads to look at Sirius, and Remus turned in his desk chair to look at Sirius.
“What?” Sirius asked. “I didn’t knock.”
“You’re the only one not currently doing anything.” Remus countered.
Sirius paused in his throwing and catching of James’ pilfered snitch to look at him incredulously.
“I am too doing something.” He argued, holding the snitch between his thumb and forefinger and waving it at him. “Besides, Junior’s just laying there.”
“I’m a guest, Black. It’d be terribly improper for me to answer your dormitory door.”
“Answer the sodding door, Sirius.” Remus grumbled as he turned back towards James.
“A ray of sunshine.” James sing-songed for Sirius’ benefit, clearly still not over his passing comment of you from days ago.
Sirius let out a dramatically petulant sigh as he stood to open the door.
Your face pinched when you saw who had answered, though Sirius had to hand it to you how quickly you corrected your expression.
Before you had a chance to tell Sirius why you were here, he looked back over his shoulder at James’ bed.
“See, I don’t think I should have to open the door for your bird!”
All that was heard was a painful sounding thump and James muttering “Barty, my glasses�� before Barty materialised at the door.
“Hi Treasure!” He greeted enthusiastically.
Sirius watched your eyes narrow as you seemingly debated whether or not to make a fuss over his nickname before ultimately deciding against it.
“Angel!” James cheered as he, too, rounded the corner and shoved Sirius out of the way. “To what do we owe this pleasure?”
Sirius sat back down on his bed where he could see you consider your options carefully.
Finally, after having the two sods stand there no doubt smothering you in smiles and soft eyes did you look shyly down at your shoes. “Can I…hang out with you guys for the afternoon?” You asked quietly.
Barty and James exchanged a - quite comical, in Sirius’ opinion - excited look before returning their gazes to you. “Of course!” They chorused; the volume startling you into lifting your head to look at them nervously.
James cleared his throat and moved out of the door frame, ushering you in. “Of course you can.” He offered quieter this time, guiding you towards his bed as he looked over his shoulder and mouthed “oh my gods” at Barty who was eagerly following behind you.
“What have you been up to today?” James asked then, clearly wondering what motivated this impromptu and voluntary visit but not wanting to chance whatever spell had been cast to get you here.
You sat down on the edge of the bed, anxiously picking at your nail beds as each boy sat tentatively beside you.
“I was studying in the library…” You offered, sounding horribly robotic and rehearsed in your response before you let out a shuddering sigh. Sirius watched as you visibly deflated and leaned slightly closer into Barty’s side. “I’ve had a bit of a headache all day.” You admit.
James and Barty both coo in unison as James cautiously rubs circles on your back; you let him.
“You have a headache?” Sirius deadpanned from across the room. “And you came here? To these two? Are they not the source?”
“Get out.” Barty spat, braving himself as he tightened his arm around you; once again, you let him.
“You can’t kick me out of my own dorm room, Junior!” Sirius argued. “Why don’t you go to your dorm room?”
“Oh, do you want to know what your baby brother and Rosier were up to before I left? Because I’ll happily scar you with that knowledge, Black.” Barty threatened.
Sirius, who was not ashamed to admit he was perhaps more than slightly immature, simply covered his ears and started singing to drown out the sound of Barty’s voice.
“That’s it, everyone out.” James barked then; tone taking on an air of Gryffindor quidditch captain.
Remus scoffed indignantly at that as Peter - clearly the wisest of the bunch - simply began packing up his homework. “You promised to help me pass this test!”
“Oh for Salazar’s sake, Lupin; the answers are A, D, B, B, A, C, D, A, A, true, true, false, Nicholas Flammel.” Barty barked at him, causing Remus to blink owlishly at him.
“Fine.” Remus finally said as he stood, shocking Sirius into silence at his quick acquiescence to such abhorrent demands. “Let’s go, Sirius.”
Sirius, feeling awfully petulant, hurled the snitch towards James’ head who quickly and calmly caught it before offering it to you as Remus hauled him off the bed by his wrist and all but dragged him towards the door.
“But it’s not fair, Moony!” Sirius pouted as he slammed on the breaks just outside the threshold of their dorm room.
“Sirius.” Remus started solemnly. “How many times did you try to convince me to snuggle with you at night before we started dating?”
“217.” Sirius answered readily, relishing in the soft smile Remus had clearly tried and failed at fighting off.
“Right, 217 times you tried to convince me to snuggle with you; and how many of those times did I deny you?”
“216.”
“Right.” Remus agreed. “And what had James done to ensure that I would relent that one time?”
Sirius let out a pained sigh as he looked to the heavens. “He charmed his, Pete’s, and your bed to the ceiling so there was only one option.”
“Right.” Remus agreed again, softer this time as he rested his hand at the juncture of Sirius’ neck and shoulder and rubbed his thumb along the column of his throat. “So don’t you think the least we could do right now is just let them have the room?”
Sirius looked back into the room in time to see you smiling softly at something James was saying as Barty placed what appeared to be a wet cloth to the back of your neck; your eyes closing and face relaxing in relief, leaning back into Barty as James massaged your calves and carried on in his story.
“What did I do to deserve this?” Sirius whined then, leaning his head into his boyfriend’s chest as he watched you curl up, not unlike a cat who had finally decided to sit on its person’s lap.
“Can you maybe try to remind yourself that James deserves this?” Remus whispered into Sirius’ hair.
“For Godric’s sake, Moony.” Sirius grumbled as he stood and began storming off in the direction of the common room. “Why d’you have to be so bloody reasonable all of the time!?”
#marauders era#marauders au#marauders fanfiction#reader insert#self insert#barty gate#darksun#sunkiller#poly!darksun#poly!darksun x reader#poly!darksun x you#poly!darksun ficlet#poly!darksun fic#poly!darksun blurb#poly!darksun imagine#poly!sunkiller#poly!sunkiller x reader#poly!sunkiller x you#poly!sunkiller fic#poly!sunkiller ficlet#james potter#james potter x reader#james potter x you#barty crouch jr#barty crouch jr x reader#barty crouch jr x you#ellecdc fics
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Part 2 of this!
*After the interview, it was cut short*
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Mal?
Malleus: ...yes?
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: HOW?! how is it that we're even married?
Malleus: Well-
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: We haven't even dated each other?!
Malleus: ...
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Look, it's not that I mind, really but-
Malleus: Really? ☺️
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Not the point Mal! How did this even happen? And for an entire year?!
Mc/Y/N/Yuu, turns to Mal: Mind explaining?
Malleus: Well, you were the one to court me
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: ...Me?
Malleus: Yes, do you remember around a year ago the time you gifted me a new tamagotchi, coupled with a pretty rock with a small card saying "love you"?
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Yes? It was a while ago, but yea
Malleus: Well, I thought that was you courting me, dear
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: ...
Malleus: ...
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: You thought that I was courting because I gave you a rock? A simple rock?
Malleus: Correction, a very pretty rock, but yes
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Please don't tell me this is the way faes court?
Malleus: Well, not exactly. Instead of the, VERY, pretty rock you gave me we usually find or buy an unpolished emerald rock and give it to the person we wish to court.
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: AN EMERALD?! UNPOLISHED EMERALD?! I gave you nothing close to that!
Malleus: Well, I assumed that given your living situation and expenses you sadly had to use a pretty rock you found instead of the emerald
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Mal, you do know that our way of "courting" is very different, right?
Malleus: I am aware, but I assumed you knew
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: ...
Mc/Y/N/Yuu, sighs: Okay, okay- wait- this was when?
Malleus: A month before we got married
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: A MONTH?!
Malleus: Yes, a month, I wished to do it sooner but thought I'd wait to respect your human traditions. Lilla also said patience is key ☺️
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: MAL A MONTH IS TOO SOON?
Malleus: It is? 😔
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: YES BUT-
Mc/Y/N/Yuu, sighing: WHEN?! HOW DID WE EVEN HAVE A WEDDING?
Malleus: Dear, the event I held a year ago in Diasomnia's courtyard was our wedding
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: I thought that was some fae holiday or tradition you guys did?
Malleus: It was not, it was our wedding
Mc/Y/N/Yuu, pacing the room: wait- you need a marriage officiant for a wedding to happen though? What about the vows? The walking down the aisle?
Malleus: The vows we said we're done in private, remember? when I poured my heart out telling you how I could never imagine you not being in my life? The marriage officiant was Lillia and the walk down the aisle I chose not to do as I couldn't wait any longer.
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Okay, so I remember the "vows" but when did I even sign the marriage license?
Malleus: As soon as you walked into the dorm doors
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: I thought that was a paper to see who came?
Malleus, worried tone, happy face: My, dear, you really should read something before you sign it 😊
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: yea, I really should
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: what about the wedding attire? I didn't wear a wedding dress/suit? The ring?
Malleus: The outfit of garments I sent to you the day before our wedding and the ring I'm assuming you thought was a "simple" gift 😞
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: THAT WAS MY WEDDING DRESS/SUIT?! And wedding ring?!
Malleus: Yes, I must say you looked positively gorgeous/beautiful/handsome and I chose the ring very well, it suits you tremendously
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Thank you-
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: okay, okay- No big deal- I'm just married to the prince of Briar Valley, descendant of fae, the most powerful mages in the world.
Malleus: I prefer to be called "Mal", by you
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: ...
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Oh by the Seven, I can't believe we got married all because I gave you a SIMPLE ROCK
Malleus: As I said before, a very pretty rock
Mc/Y/N/Yuu: Mal, we don't even live together
The rock You/Mc/Y/N/Yuu gave to Malleus:
Authors note: (this turned out longer than I thought 😭)
(FINALLY! DONE! No next part... Unless a part 3 where they talk it out better? Nah.... Unless)
Dividers by/from @/cafekitsune
#twisted wonderland#twst#disney twisted wonderland#twst memes#twst game#random-twst-things-incorrect-quotes#twisted wonderland x reader#🌺. random twst things#twst mc#malleus draconia#twst malleus draconia#twst malleus x reader#twst malleus#malleusdraconia#malleus draconia x reader#malleus x reader#twisted wonderland malleus#x reader#gender neutral reader#Part 2#part 3 maybe?
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Breña
Jake Kiszka x reader
18+ only! Minors do not interact!
Warnings: graphic sexual content, unprotected sex, alcohol consumption, mentions of cheating, oral sex (m rec), illusions to oral sex (fem rec), fingering, etc.
Inspired by this delicious ask and blurb that was sent to me ages ago. I promised I’d get to this one, and I did, I’m just sorry it took me so long. Forgive me 💕
Loosely edited, but what else is new?
“Get fucked, Josh.” Jake barks with such venom your head snaps in his direction. He rarely speaks unkindly, even if it is only his twin brother, who will love him anyway, on the receiving end.
For his part in the exchange, Josh merely smooths a nonexistent wrinkle in his shirt with an airy chuckle. “Maybe you should take your own advice, brother. Seems like you need to get laid. Awful testy, darling.”
He means it as a joke. A laugh to lighten the mood. Unfortunately, it doesn’t land and you watch on in shocked silence as Jake slaps his glass of whiskey down on the coffee table before him, and then stalks from the room without a word - his absence solidified by the sharp slam of his bedroom door.
”You shouldn’t have said that,” your admonishment is quiet, issued tepidly while you stare down into your glass of wine. You feel intrusive, yes, but you feel worse for Jake, and that wins out.
”I know,” he agrees with the decency to at least sound repentant, “But I didn’t mean it that way. And besides, it's been months. He just needs to get on with it.”
”He loved her.” Your standpoint certainly doesn’t come from a place of loyalty to Jake’s ex - you loathed her, but instead, for Jake and his clearly wounded heart.
”He didn’t love her,” Josh corrects, and likely rightly so “He loved the idea of her. There’s a big fucking difference.”
Perhaps you shouldn’t insert yourself, but you’ve never been great about biting your tongue. ”Maybe give him some time to figure that out for himself, then.”
Josh rises with a smile that tells you your candor hasn’t ruffled his feathers. It’s so difficult to rile him up that it often feels like some twisted challenge, “Don’t you ever get tired of being right all the time? Seems exhausting to me. You should try being a fuck up…I could give you lessons.”
He drops a kiss upon the crown of your head and trips off to place his glass in the sink. “I seem to have worn out my welcome here at Jacob’s Tavern on the Green. You want a ride? I only had the one.”
”No,” you wave him off and nip at your glass, “I might just crash on the couch. The A/C’s out at my place again.”
”Alright, then,” he shrugs on his jacket and pats at his hair as if he’s prepping for a night out rather than the quick drive home, “Don’t poke the bear though, doll face. I’d like to keep you unscathed. Kinda like you.”
”That’s funny,” you deadpan, “Because I can’t stand you.”
He wrinkles his nose, offers a quick wink, and then out the front door he slips.
The couch remains your lighthouse for a time, but everyone knows Josh gives terrible advice, so if he has warned against poking the bear, that’s obviously exactly what you should do.
That’s what you tell yourself, at least, just before knocking softly on his bedroom door. “Jake?”
Your call is met with silence, but just before you turn to leave, feeling dejected and meddlesome, the door cracks open to reveal him, now barefoot and shirtless…a pair of sweats resting so low on his hips your mind wanders into dangerous territory “What’s up? Bored of my idiot brother already?”
He’s presenting a brave face, but you can see the anguish in his eyes, and also, something else that you can’t quite place.
”He left, actually.” Why do you suddenly feel so stupid? “I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You seem…I don’t know, on edge?”
He reaches out and gives your arm a friendly squeeze, “I’m alright, sweetheart. He just dances on my last nerve, that’s all.”
And while that’s not a total lie, you also know there’s a lot more to it, so you gently push him along. “You sure, Jake? You can talk to me, you know? I’ve been there, I understand how hard it is to miss someone you shouldn’t.”
Searching your face for something you can’t identify, he lets a stretch of quiet carry on a beat too long, before finally shaking his head, holding the door open a little wider in wordless invitation.
Once you’re perched awkwardly at the foot of his bed, hands clasped and ankles crossed, he speaks up “I don’t miss her, necessarily. It’s just hard. Especially the way it ended. I just…”
God, he looks so small and walled off. “You just what?”
Slumping onto the bed beside you, he sighs “I just wish it had ended differently.”
”It never ends well,” you flop down as well, and stare up at the ceiling as though constellations might appear to dazzle you. “Everyone always hates the ending. Doesn’t make it any easier, though.”
”Do you miss her?” He asks, staring up at that bright, blank white just as you are.
What an absurd question. Why should he care? And were you really that great at pretending to like her to spare his feelings?
The moment seems to scream for honesty, so you hand it over. “No, I don’t. I never cared much for her to begin with, and then she…” you falter and search for a kind way to describe it, “and then she did what she did to you, and I— no, I don’t miss her at all.”
”It’s alright to just say it. She cheated on me.” He laughs a little. “Fuck, how pathetic does that sound?”
Rolling to your side to face him, you blink away his self deprecation, “It isn’t pathetic, Jake. Not on your end, anyway.”
“I suppose I just wonder what I did or didn’t do, you know?” He chuckles quietly to mask his vulnerability, “What did he do that I didn’t? Why wasn’t I enough?”
“I don’t think that’s really how it works,” you assure him, turning to stare up at his ceiling once again, but now reaching for his hand. “Besides, I can’t imagine you not being enough.”
He returns your encouraging squeeze and makes a half-whispered joke, a verbal mask to hide behind. “Maybe I just wasn’t good enough in bed. I swear I know where everything is, and where things go…mostly.”
”Shut up,” you laugh softly so as not to disturb the calm that has settled. “I have zero doubts about your abilities, Jake Kiszka, in bed or otherwise.”
Now, he is the one rolling to his side to face you. “And what does that mean?”
”I don’t know,” you shrug, suddenly feeling extremely on display. “It’s just…well, in my experience, men like you don’t often disappoint in that department.”
”Men like me?” You have perked his interest and plucked at that mildly conceited chord that lives within him. “And what type of man am I exactly, sweetheart?”
”I’m not going to stroke your ego, Jacob. Though if you’d like to do it yourself, I’d be happy to leave the room.”
He laughs at that, “If I planned on stroking something you’d leave the room? Another devastating blow to my pride.”
You groan in mock exasperation at his tactless humor, earning another chuckle from him. You love the sound of his laugh, and you love being the one to make him laugh even more.
”It’s not like it would matter anyway.” He sighs, nuzzling against his duvet to get comfortable. “Stroking something, I mean.”
”Jake!” Your head whips to meet his scandalous gaze.
”Oh, grow up.” He grins, eyes flashing with mischief, but still something else that you can’t place.
He’s right. You promised him he could talk to you, so you shake it off and start anew. “What do you mean?”
”I just…can’t…” he pauses, searching for his resolve. “Not since she left.”
You’re shocked, and unfortunately, not hiding it well. “You haven’t had sex since then?”
It doesn’t seem possible. He’s gorgeous and charming, charismatic and dripping sex. Women crawl for him everywhere you go.
“I haven’t done anything since she left.” He corrects, dodging your stare. “I can’t. No matter what I do. I feel like I’m losing my mind. Every time I get anywhere near I—“
He abruptly cuts himself off, “I’m sorry. This isn’t cool. I shouldn’t be telling you this. I don’t know what I was thinking. Let’s just pretend it never happened.”
“No,” the last thing you want him to do is shut down. “It’s okay. Talk to me.”
He closes himself off again with a clipped shake of his head ”You don’t want to hear this shit.”
Alright, that’s it, he can’t have it his way. He can fight you tooth and nail, but you’re going to march on anyway and drag him along, kicking and screaming.
“So you haven't gotten off since the split?” You ask as if it’s no big deal…and maybe it isn’t.
“Jesus, babe…” he teases, “such a mouth on you.”
Interesting choice of words, Jacob.
”It’s just surprising to me, that’s all.” It’s a leading comment, and you damn well know it.
”Why?”
”Because you’re you, Jake.” Now you’ve spun to face him again as well. “You just walk around like living, breathing sex all the time. And you’re also a liar with your ‘mostly’ bullshit. You know where everything goes and then some. I can tell.”
”You sound terribly sure of your analysis, sweetheart.” His voice has grown quiet and it makes you long to squeeze your thighs together.
“Am I wrong?” Oh, you seem to have grown quiet as well. When did that happen? “Because I don’t think I am.”
He ignores your question, “Living, breathing sex, huh?”
”Again, I can leave the room if you’d like to sing your own praises.”
His fingers reach up to smooth an errant lock of hair away from your forehead, “You are the one singing my praises. I’m simply enjoying the attention.”
You’re further hushed at his touch ”You’re a smug little shit, you know that?”
“Yes,” he nods, “I do know that…it’s just been a bit since I could remember why.”
You want this. You want this so badly you might even be inclined to beg for it. Instead, you seize the opportunity with feigned confidence. “I could help you. If you wanted.”
His fingers are still caressing your forehead, lulling you so softly, “Help me how?”
”I don’t know,” you’re toying with the chain around his neck now, avoiding his eyes, “I could…try.”
”Try what?” There’s a smirk ghosting at the corner of his beautiful mouth, and it betrays his intentions. He knows exactly what you mean. He just wants you to say it.
Now or never. “I could get you off. If it would help. I mean, I’d like to…I want to help.”
The strong column of his throat bobs as he swallows hard, and then there is his nose, nuzzling against yours, the closest to his kiss that you have ever been ”You want to make me cum?”
The way he speaks of it, as if you two have been here a thousand times together before, is so sexy your head is suddenly spinning.
You offer a tiny nod and then hurry on before you lose your nerve, “You could just lie here and I could…”
Every ounce of confidence seeps from your bones when his eyes, cinnamon sugar and blown wild with lust, catch your own.
”You could what?” He presses the gentlest kiss against your cheek.
”I could use my mouth…I…” fuck, you can hardly breathe, and the room feels too small, crowded up with tension and long repressed desire.
A needy, hungry groan rumbles out of his chest as he pulls you a little closer. “You would do that for me?”
”Of course I would.”
His eyes are on your lips now, agonized and desperate. “Have you thought about it before, or do you just feel sorry for me?”
He knows the answer. There’s that smugness you spoke of.
”I think about it all the time.” You whisper honestly. “Do you?”
”No.” his hands fist into your hair. “I don’t think about my cock in your mouth,” oh god, the way those words tumble off of his pretty tongue, dripping saccharine but so dark “but I do think about my face between your thighs…how you’d sound. How you would taste. How you might rock your hips against me when I got you close.”
In response, you’re on your knees before him in a breath, fingers curled into the waistband of his sweats, imploring him with your gaze for permission.
He nods with a hitching inhale and that’s all the confirmation you need. Pulling them down, there it is. Stunning and achingly hard, thick and pulsing for you. As breathtaking as an obscene symphony. He looks so ready, leaking opalescent droplets into the soft dusting of hair below his belly button. You doubt you’ve ever wanted anything more.
The flat of your tongue runs warm and wet from base to tip, nudging harder at that special spot just below his velvety head. How did you know? He wonders as he twitches against your kiss.
After such a long stretch of fighting to get off, he’s now frightened he just might embarrass himself and cover your lovely face before you’ve even had a chance to suck him in.
But suck him in you do, without warning, and so deeply he can feel the silken back of your throat. Lurching forward, curling in on himself against the pleasure, he chokes out a humiliating sound and grabs at you…one hand tangled in your hair, the other clutched around the nape of your neck. “Oh my god, baby, please…”
You nod your understanding and swallow around him, sweeping your tongue back and forth. He sounds blissful but pushes you away without warning. “M’gonna cum,” he murmurs through his panting breaths, “just give me a second.”
How has he gotten here so quickly? It’s horribly humbling, but he wants it so badly his heart is resting in his throat, thrumming savagely, pulse-points pounding a fierce and uncontrollable beat.
”That’s the fucking point, Jake,” you fist at his wet cock and drink him back down once before pulling back, “You need it, I can feel it. Cum in my mouth. Please?”
Your please, so sweet and innocent while asking for something so filthy, snatches a growl out of him that flushes you with unbearable heat.
Both of his palms find either side of your head tentatively, “Can I stand?”
You nod eagerly around him, and then gaze up at his face once he is hovered above you like a deity soaked in depravity. There is a pink blush painted across the bridge of his nose and cheeks that makes you feel as soft as warm cotton.
“I want to use your mouth,” he hushes, “Is that alright?”
Again, you merely nod with your mouth stuffed full of him.
”You give me a little shove if you want to stop…” he coddles your cheek, and speaks like a lullaby as you blink up at him in consent.
When he drives inside of you, it is a vicious invasion, but one that you’d plead for over and over again. He is buried so deeply inside your throat you can scarcely breathe, but the threading of his brow and the steady moans dripping from his lips are all you’ve ever wanted.
He’s twitching already against your tongue, slipping deeper into you until you’re fighting a gag that only wrecks him further.
One, two, three, thrusts and he is reduced to whimpers, “Shit, oh god, please, I need it. I need it so bad. I need to—“ a pained grunt, through gritted teeth, interrupts his babbling, “I’m cumming, sweetheart…”
The taste of his release dances across your taste buds as you struggle to swallow him down.
He is shuddering and cursing above you, holding you still as he shakes his head violently in apology, “I’m sorry…” his voice is but a phantom of itself, “It’s too much, I shouldn’t have…not in your mouth…oh fuck, fuck…”
And you’d tell him if you could, that it is a privilege…his offering, a gift. Instead, you allow every drop to roll down your throat as you suckle gently for more until he is shivering in overstimulation.
Finally, you allow his cock to slip from your mouth as his thumbs sweep over your cheekbones. “I— goddamn…thank you, sweetheart. I feel like I can’t breathe.”
”You’re welcome, Jake…” your thumbs find their own place to sweep against - his thighs. “Thank you.”
His lips part to protest, but pull back into a snarling hiss when you wrap your hand around his length “You’re still hard.”
He looks half-bashful, “I’d say it’s been a while, but I think it’s just you.”
”Yeah?” You rise from your knees and nip at his chin, “Have I made you hard before?”
”Does someone have a bit of a praise kink?” His grip sinks into the dips of your hips beneath your shirt, “Do you like knowing you’ve made my dick ache?”
”Maybe,” you shimmy your shoulders nonchalantly, “or maybe I’m just a cock tease.”
”Get on the bed.” He demands, in lieu of an actual retort, while tugging at the button and zipper of your jeans. “Everything off. You may lay however you’d like, but I want that pussy on display for me…let me see her.”
You may? Well…there’s that bit of dominance you had imagined hidden away inside of him more times than you care to admit
Dropping down on the bed, completely bared to him for the first time, you close your eyes against his appreciative scrutiny, “You’re fucking perfect,” his words are nearly vibrating, “Stay just like that and let me look at you.”
Demurely, you do as he says.
”Legs a little wider, babe…lemme see that sugary little cunt,” oh, he’s deliciously dirty.
”Hi, pretty girl,” he coos when your knees press against the sheets.
”Hi.” You murmur back softly.
He ever so gently waves you off, “Not talking to you, sweetheart. Mind your own business.”
Your cheek kisses linen as you nestle your face into the bed, content to allow him to have his private moment with your pussy. If that’s what he wants, that’s what he gets
His fingertips are there now, curling so lightly over your swollen clit, pretending like they just might nudge inside you now and then, until you’re writhing with want. “Please, Jake…” a tremulous, tiny mewl escapes you. A vexing little sound that heats your face and betrays your need.
His eyebrows quirk upward, “Inside?”
”Inside.” You nod earnestly.
Without warning, you’re filled with his middle and ring fingers. They search along your walls as his gaze clocks your expression until you cry out. “Right there, baby?” He pouts, mocking your whine. “Is that the spot?”
”Faster,” the blood in your veins is rushing at a feverish pitch, the taste of his cum still lingering on your tongue has broken you wide open.
“No,” he shushes, the soft pad of his thumb nudging at your clit “Nice and slow, sweetheart. Relax for me.”
You do your best and fill your lungs to the brim with air that smells of sex and him before releasing it slowly.
“Good girl, baby.” He praises, fucking you gingerly with his hand as if this is all either of you will ever do for the rest of your days…no rush. “When you cum, can this pretty princess make a mess?”
”Hmm?” You’re a million miles away, drifting through his sea, you’ve barely registered him speaking to you.
“If I make you cum,” he clarifies, pressing up into that place that makes you whimper and half-squirm away. He holds you down firmly, but with such tenderness. “Stay still, for me. If I make you cum just right will you soak my hand all sweet and warm?”
”I can’t…” you flush with inexplicable shame, “I don’t do that.”
”That’s alright…you just let me take care of you.” He sounds like he’s coddling a wounded bird just before he begins curling and massaging inside you with a tiny smirk on his face that seems to claim he knows something you don’t.
Never before has anyone’s touch dismantled you so perfectly, and you’re soaked and dripping; wet, heavenly sounds filling the room to mark your pleasure.
“No messes for my sweetheart? Just a neat and tidy little baby?” He taunts as your thighs begin to tremble, “I think you’re lying. maybe not with someone else, but I know you’ve worked this pretty, wet cunt just right…ruined your sheets, had to fight to stay quiet so no one would hear—“
With a cry that could be mistaken for agonized, you let go…barely there-tiny bursts of slick sprinkling across his palm like a spring mist. Were he a garden, he would bloom so beautifully under the kiss of your meager shower.
“There we go, sweetheart,” your eyes are locked in on his arm, watching the muscles turn and twist as if you’ve been hypnotized. “C’mon, just a little longer, relax, sweet girl, relax…”
It’s like lying in too-tall grass on a breezy day. Warm and gentle like an embrace, and his voice is ferrying you through it all so sweetly. How could she have ever given this up?
When you begin to tense against his ministrations, he pulls back delicately and pats the inside of your thigh, huffing the softest sigh of a laugh, “And you said no messes.”
“Jake,” your hands are instantly hiding your eyes, face sparking heat with a euphoric fluster.
“You did good, baby.” He whispers, kissing a path along your shoulder. “I’ve been thinking about that for a very long time.”
“Please,” your entire body is still inwardly writhing and you can’t manage much more.
“Please what?” His hand, so gentle and soft, drags yours downward to wrap your fingers around himself. He is thick, throbbing rhythmically, and so hard, “You want that?”
He sounds in control, but it’s all there for you in his eyes, he wants this badly. He needs this. He needs you…and not simply because it’s been months.
Grabbing his free hand from where it is resting beside your head against the mattress, you guide it down until his fingers are stroking delicately across you, wetting his touch, warm and silken, “You want that?”
He visibly falters, face ducking to find solace in the crook of your neck, “I want you,” he whispers so airily you aren’t even sure you’ve heard him, “I want you so fucking badly. Please, baby…”
His voice is hushed, dragging across your skin hot and wet, desperate and hungry, you couldn’t deny him even if you were crazy enough to want to.
“You don’t have to beg,” you promise, hands now petting through his hair. “You take what you need, Jake…it’s all for you.”
”I need to get off again first,” the words sigh warm against the shell of your ear, “I’m too close. You’re so pretty and warm, and you smell so good. My sweetheart.”
”Well, look who gets soft when he’s this hard.” You tease, gently stroking the cashmere tip of his cock against your clit. “You cum as fast as you need to, let me do this for you.”
Again, his beautiful face drops to hide away, mouth sucking chills into your throat.
“I don’t want to be that guy.” He confesses, sounding shy in a way you’ve never heard before. “I want to get you there, too.”
You reach down deep and find your nerve, “Is this a one time thing? It’s okay to say yes.”
At last, his stare finds yours, “I certainly fucking hope not.”
”So, you’ll owe me one.” You shrug with a cheeky smile to soothe his nerves.
”No.” he shocks you with a fervent shake of his head as he lines himself up, nudging in gently with his pillowy soft tip, “I’m gonna get you off, baby…right on my cock.”
Dirty fuck, who would’ve thought?
”Deeper, Jake,” you’re whining already, fingernails sinking into his shoulders to pull him in closer. “Fuck me.”
”Say it again.” He orders, kissing a path along your jaw.
”Fuck me,” you repeat as though you know nothing but how to follow him into the woods, “Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, please…”
His cock is right there teasing at you, barely inside, working your entire body into a frenzy, you want it so badly.
”Please?” His nose Eskimo kisses yours, “You’re begging very sweetly. You sound like an angel.”
“Haven’t I begged enough?” The words pant out of you warm against his lips and that - the taste of your aching need, shoves him over the edge.
Hips rolling, he slides into you like he was made to fit. The stretch is a lovely, stinging heat that claws a blissful cry from deep within your lungs. It's his favorite sound, he decides in an instant, and he wants to listen to it for the rest of his life.
As if the two of your were created simply to share this together, he fits inside of you perfectly, nestling against that sweet, hidden spot over and over until your back has arched away from the sheets and your nails scratch at him for purchase.
”So soft and tight,” his praise is but a breath, “You feel so fucking good.”
”I’m close,” you whisper back, cunt gripping at him violently, “don’t stop.”
”Wait for me, sweetheart…” he sounds filthy and angelic all at once. “I’m almost there, just…fuck, just wait for me.”
”Inside,” have you even made a sound? “Do it inside, Jake.”
”Are you sure?” He slurs, drunk off of you and ready to melt.
”Yes,” you nod frantically against the pillow, knotting your hair, “Do it. Fucking do it.”
Lost for words, he replies with a growl that takes that tightened coil deep in your belly and snaps it into pieces.
”Oh fuck,” his body tenses against you, thrust losing rythym as you flutter and clench around his twitching cock. “Gonna cum, baby, yes…you feel so…fuck…”
You watch in awe as his face twists gorgeously, eyes rolling back before squeezing closed, lip curled into a delicious snarl - and then, with a drawn out groan of your name, he collapses against you, kissing gratitude and love against your throat until the tickle of his hair makes you giggle.
”Get off me,” you laugh, shoving at his shoulders tenderly as he rolls to his side, smiling prettily at you like a kid in a candy store.
”You have magic between those pretty thighs.” He sighs, smoothing your hair. “I’m gonna tear solos up about it. Write the dirtiest riffs and licks all about that perfect pussy.”
”You’re fucking disgusting,” you sigh back, attempting to chase down your breath, “and such a guy.”
He pulls you in close, tucking his body, slick and hot, into your own, “Shh, you love me.”
Maybe he doesn’t mean it that way, and maybe you don’t either, just yet…
…but maybe you will.
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the styles' nanny: part two
Summary: Harry finally realizes his mistake, but is it too late? Featuring a strange encounter with Jamie’s mother, another sad drinking session and an unfiltered conversation that changes everything.
Pairing: plussize-nanny!y/n + older-singledad!harry
Word-count: 10.2k
Warnings: age gap (13 years), mentions of alcohol and drinking, kissing, mentions of sex
here’s part one!
A/N: guys!!! It’s been three months!!! I hope you haven’t completely lost interest in this story :( I’m sorry I’ve kept you waiting for so long, I just didn’t expect so many things to come up (plus somewhere along the way I lost motivation). I also hope you enjoy this second and (at least for now) last part. No smut, but maybe in a blurb/oneshot of some kind? Anyway thanks for waiting and happy reading!
—
I’m resigning. I will stay until we find a replacement but not longer than necessary. I thank you for your generosity during my time working for you, but I’m ready for a fresh start as I think it’s what would be best for me right now.
I’ll see you soon,
Y/N
That was the text Harry had received at 11am, just one hour ago. He’d called profusely, probably ten times in total, and had sent out a pathetic amount of text messages that had all gone ignored and unanswered.
Harry had lashed out— he could see that now; he’d been horribly unfair and he had taken advantage of Y/N’s inability to express herself in situations of distress. Harry’s worst trait was his short-temperedness and while he had gone through years of therapy to work on it, sometimes it took ahold of him in ways he couldn’t realize until after the fact.
Of course the last thing he’d wanted was for her to resign, which was exactly why her message had twisted his stomach a bit more intensely than he would’ve liked; he had no idea how to rectify this situation. Most things in his life went as he wished and if they didn’t, he found it was easy to make it so they did. But not now— no, he had to think about this carefully.
It had turned one when his phone rang; he was typing away in his office, trying to distract himself. Her caller ID flashed on his screen, but it wasn’t her voice that caught his ears— it was a man’s. A man’s whose name was Andrew.
“I’m from the viper,” he said, and Harry could swear he started seeing red, “your friend Y/N got a little too drunk for me to feel comfortable sending her away on her own. Is there any way you could come pick her up?”
Harry couldn’t help the string of curses which left his mouth as he gathered his house key. “Is she okay?” He asked, only to receive a conflicted hum.
“She had too many martinis and she was crying earlier. She said something about a fight.”
“Yeah, okay. Thanks, man. Will you keep an eye out until I get there?”
“Of course.”
As Harry got into his car, he felt the overwhelming urge to chastise her, to keep talking until she finally listened to him when it came to her own safety. Not even one day had passed since he’d had to pick her up the last time— no lesson learned, no regrets.
But then, as he neared the bar, the rational part of his brain advised him against it. Y/N was no child, she was aware of her actions and she knew what was best for her— so for Harry to act high and mighty would be wrong and uncalled for.
He needed to just be there for her. Drop the barrier and be there.
He was ready to offer that to her.
—
Y/N could swear her eyes were playing tricks on her. It wouldn’t be unrealistic, really, her vision had become blurry about an hour ago— but, well, she would probably recognize that silhouette anywhere. He wore jeans and a shirt and his hair was still styled for work; Andrew was pointing at her, and so his green eyes followed. When he spotted her, Y/N felt naked under his gaze.
And before she knew it, he was walking toward her.
“What are you doing here?” She demanded, lower lip jutted out in a pout. Y/N had gone drinking in the hopes of distracting herself— and yes, maybe it wasn’t exactly working, but it definitely wouldn’t start working if he was physically here.
“Andrew called me. Stand up, I’m taking you home.”
Andrew was somebody she‘d met a few hours ago. Originally he‘d flirted with her, asking questions about her as she sat at the bar willing to answer all of them soberly— but once eleven had struck, all she could talk about was Harry. Y/N wasn’t fond of airing out dirty laundry so she‘d left the gory details of their fight out, but Andrew knew of a fight.
She was starting to regret it now that Harry was here.
Instead of doing as he’d asked— or ordered, more like, she leaned into the booth further.
“No.”
His eyebrow raised, “no?”
“I don’t leave or go out with dickheads. You taught me that.”
He looked ticked off and it satisfied something within her that had been needing it all night. When he breathed a sigh, eyes closing momentarily, she knew she had him.
“Y/N, would you please humor me and let me take you home? We can keep talking in the car, but not in front of these people.”
“What if I don’t want to go home, huh? Why are you always telling me what to do like you have the right? You’re not my dad.” Her words were slurred and her expression loose. Then she laughed to herself, giggled actually, ridiculously loud. “That’s funny, of course you’re not my dad cause he’s dead! Dead, six feet underground, you know? Probably lower, cause he definitely didn’t go to heaven! He’s, like, really deep underground.”
Concern warped his features.
“Y/N,” he warned, “please.”
She’d turned heads.
“But you know what you and my dad have in common? Yelling. Just yelling, for no fucking reason— yell yell yell, make it feel like my fault even though it isn’t. Right? That’s what my dad used to do to my mom, you know that? That’s why he’s in hell.”
She was pointing an accusatory finger at him, slurring even more than before.
“And you know what I said to her when she left him? That I would never let a man treat me that way. Never! Promised, hand on my heart and everything, I promised. But you’re different, aren’t you? Cause I like you, cause you’re not like my dad.” Her face fell again into the surfaces of her palms, “you’re not like my dad, but you reminded me of him. And I feel— feel like I’m betraying my mom.” Y/N hiccuped quietly, stumbling over a few words.
The gravity of her words were not lost on him— in fact, he’d never felt as guilty in his life.
“Hey,” he beckoned her to look at him, placing his tentative hand atop her arm, “we’ll talk about it. About everything. But not now. Not here.”
“You’re so confusing, you know that? One second you’re really nice to me and then— and then you aren’t.”
“Sweetheart,” he grasped her face as a last attempt to catch her undivided attention. Harry thumbed at her cheek and stared dutifully into her clouded eyes, “let me take care of you tonight. I’ll make it better.”
In all fairness, she’d lost the fight the second his eyes had met hers. There was something about them, maybe their deep shade of green or how effortlessly she could read them, that could probably persuade her into doing anything.
“Fine,” she mumbled after a minute, letting Harry wrap an arm around her waist as they walked. On their way out Y/N said goodbye to Andrew and stayed quiet otherwise, choosing to give Harry the silent treatment. Harry knew he couldn’t expect her to speak to him, so he didn’t force it.
As they drove, Harry couldn’t help glancing over every once in a while to study her expressions. There was barely a moment she wasn’t staring out the window watching cars drive by; even when his hand instinctively landed on her thigh she didn’t react, only moving it away slightly from his touch.
“Are you driving me to my apartment?”
And although both of them knew he’d really been directed toward his house, Harry still pretended to have chosen to take another route. “Course,” he muttered hoarsely, trying to mask his embarrassment with a quiet cough. Y/N sighed, her eyes pressing shut for a moment as she tried to let the guilt roll off of her back. He doesn’t deserve your sympathy.
“Where’s Jamie?”
He clicked his tongue. “Still at my mother’s.”
“Oh.”
The stubborn thing she was, Y/N refused Harry’s help getting out of the car. Instead she opened the door by herself, almost tripped when she jumped down from her seat and kept a distance anyway. Harry still watched, though, ready to help if needed.
Y/N unlocked the door (failing to find the keyhole several times) and kept it wide open for Harry to follow behind. The first thing she did was toe off her shoes followed by falling into bed.
“Y/N, have some water.”
“Stop telling me what to do,” she uttered, but accepted the glass of water anyway.
He ignored her. “Are you hungry?”
“I’m tired.”
“You can sleep as soon as you’ve changed and washed your face.”
She groaned, pulling a blanket over her head, “Harry…”
“Y/N.”
That stern mention of her name was enough to get her out of bed, limbs pretty much hanging loosely from her body as if she had no control over them— and honestly, it felt like she didn’t. Her eyes closed as Harry wiped a cool cloth over her face, ridding it of a light layer of makeup and sweat, everything that had accumulated at the bar. There were times she leaned into him, forehead falling to his shoulder and arms wrapping instinctively around his waist for support. She could swear that for a moment he’d pressed his lips to her forehead, but the daydream she was in barred her from really registering it.
“Why’d you go out drinking again?”
“Wanted to.”
“Told you not to do that. I meant it.”
“Well people keep hurting my feelings,” she mumbled, “and drinking your pain away is kind of a tradition in my family, so.”
Y/N had never really shared personal details about her family to Harry, but… well, the words were flowing right out of her mouth and the memories reincarnated newly in her head. She was referring to her mother, the former alcoholic in the family. Growing up her mother had drunk so much that she’d almost died from liver failure. As a small child Y/N had promised herself never to end up like her, but she was starting to understand more and more why her mother spent so many years drinking.
Harry‘s thoughts stayed internalized, but he made sure to make her feel heard. Rubbing over the top of her eyebrow, his breath hit her forehead as he spoke, “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. You didn’t deserve it.”
Her eyes peeked open, the previously warm towel no longer warm. Harry ran it under water again. “Deserve what?”
“Everything, especially the way I behaved earlier. I should’ve taken a moment to myself, instead I lashed out on you.”
It wasn’t until now that Y/N noticed the close proximity between her and Harry— obviously she knew he was cleaning her face for her, but it didn’t really click until now, she supposed. She could see everything, but it didn’t really matter; there was nothing about Harry, especially on him, that could deter her from thinking of him as the most beautiful man alive. Imperfections and all.
The towel met her neck this time, the other side held upright by his steady hand. She could feel his thumb tracing shapes on the surface of her skin and although she was trying very hard not to think of him in any inappropriate way, the image of his hand wrapped around her throat awakened something horrible within the confines of her intoxicated mind. It stayed there.
It was self destructive how often she spent thinking about him, really.
“You still there, baby?”
And he was so gentle— whenever he wasn’t yelling at her, of course— and soft, knowing the lines of what she could handle and what she couldn’t. No man had ever been this considerate and while it may just be his nature, it meant everything to Y/N. As the boundaries had begun to blur more and more, it became easier to misinterpret normal gestures for something more, something so much realer than it could ever be.
But he was calling her baby, and nobody had done that before.
“Yeah.”
“You were much more mouthy back in the bar,” he breathed out, an amused smile tugging at his lips. “Don’t wanna yell at me anymore?”
“No, I‘m not like you.”
“Ouch.”
Harry was humoring her and while it was really really nice; this whole thing, the gentle touches and the giggles shared in between a serious conversation, Y/N couldn’t let it get to her head.
“You were really mean to me and I didn’t do anything.”
His eyes searched for hers, but hers were stuck to his chest. “I know. I don’t know how to make it up to you, but I’ll spend a long time trying, I promise. You’re so sweet to me, so nice, I don’t mean to hurt your feelings. You know that, right?”
And although her heart was still furiously bleeding out, she was willing to ignore that for now. Throw bandages on and refuse a trip to the hospital because really she was just fine. There was just something about how he spoke to her that made it feel like she was floating— like she really was fine.
“Yeah.”
“Good, it’s very important to me that you do.”
Y/N’s eyes nearly glazed over when she thought about Harry being like this on the regular. It was a dangerous game they were playing.
“Look at me,” he breathed, beckoning her to do so with the grip he still had on her throat. Her eyes looked so innocent in this moment and although Harry knew Y/N was nothing if not tainted, she looked like she’d never been touched by the realities of life. “So pretty, you know that? So beautiful.”
She felt smaller in his gaze. “You think so?”
Y/N didn’t think anyone had said that to her ever. Nothing of the sort.
“I know so.”
“Thank you.”
“How about we go find you something comfortable to sleep in, yeah?”
“Yeah,” Y/N shook her head, willing to rid herself of this weird tension in her body before allowing Harry to lead her back into the bedroom. She sat on the edge of the bed as Harry retrieved some clothes and looked up at him expectantly when she could barely keep upright.
“You sure?”
“I physically can’t stand up, Harry.”
And though he looked torn, he ended up reaching for her sweater to pull it over her body, revealing the lacy bra she hid underneath. Y/N’s breasts had always been the biggest ones amongst her skinny friends and growing up she often felt ridiculed for it, though she supposed she could count on Harry not to judge. They were just there, so why pretend like they weren’t?
For Harry, taking off Y/N’s sweater was a completely different experience and although he didn’t wish to be a creep, he couldn’t help but letting out an awkward but knowing cough when he accidentally stared right down them. He hastily threw the shirt he’d brought her onto her torso, scared of what would happen if he were to delay it any longer. Harry prided himself on being a respectful man, but being with Y/N had always tested that quality of his.
“What?” She asked, a touch of feigned innocence to her tone, and he rushed to shake his head.
She knew what.
“Nothing.”
“M’kay.”
“Stand up for me?”
Y/N felt less amazing about her thighs, to be frank. She couldn’t really explain it, but they weren’t visually pleasing to her; cellulite littered the back of them and she obviously didn’t have a thigh gap, but that had become less of an issue. Y/N felt like her thighs had no real redeeming quality. It was a destructive way of thinking, she would admit, but… well, she’d carried that around since childhood.
As Harry pulled down her jeans, she felt void of anything. She didn’t exactly feel great, but better than when other guys had taken off her trousers. It was probably his age. She figured maturity increased as age did, and if Harry were to dislike the look of her body, he would be graceful about it.
“Hold onto my shoulders and lift your right leg.”
He got on his knees in front of her, pulling one leg in after the other. After doing so successfully, he allowed her to get under the covers.
“I’m still mad at you,” she mumbled into the covers, eyes fluttering to a close.
He hummed, “I know.”
“But thank you.”
“Don’t have to thank me for taking care of you.”
“Mhm,” she breathed, “it’ll be the last time, I promise.”
Sleep was pulling at her eyelids.
“Last time what?”
He received no answer. Upon a closer look, he saw Y/N completely overtaken by sleep. Her lips were situated in a pout and her foot peeked out of her thick comforter in the way he had already seen last time he’d brought her to bed.
He allowed himself more time to watch over her this time, scared that if he were to leave it would be the last he saw of her. The anxiety settled on his chest in heavy waves and the image of a precious Y/N was slipping further away from his mind. He had been a horrible person, allowing himself to become the type of man he’d always tried not to be… and he couldn’t do that to her. He couldn’t let this be that with her. He couldn’t bare it.
Harry had always thought of himself to be tattooed with imperfections. As he stared down at Y/N’s sleeping body, he couldn’t help the guilt that wrapped around him like a torture blanket. To him, she was perfect. She was kind and beautiful, she carried her heart out on her sleeve and overcame her past to grow in spite of painful trauma.
What he didn’t know, though, was that she thought the same of him. She thought of him as the most capable person, strong and kind. Her heart yearned for him in ways no one could comprehend.
She thought of him as everything but instead of embracing it, he’d pushed her away… and now both of them had to suffer the consequences.
—
Harry had stayed the night, but he hadn‘t slept; he‘d spent the night lying on Y/N‘s uncomfortable couch with various thoughts swirling around in his head. At eight he‘d stood up, started preparing breakfast and wasted time looking through social media to distract himself from the girl sleeping in the next room.
Y/N slipped out thirty minutes later, surprised when she saw Harry moving through her kitchen as though he knew it like the back of his hand. She coughed, not knowing where to put her arms and folding them in instead.
“Hi, sweetheart,” he tried to smile, “I hope you’re hungry, I made you a bagel with eggs if that’s okay.”
“That’s… yeah,” she swallowed a lump in her throat, stepping close to the counter, “thank you. You didn’t have to.”
“My pleasure. You—“ he pointed at the side of her face, “you have something there.”
“Oh, I—“ Harry reached forward to swipe at it, wiping his finger clean on his trousers and stroking her cheek once for good measure. “Thanks. Probably toothpaste.”
“Probably.”
Silence decorated their next few seconds, awkward glances and uncomfortable tension felt down to the bones. Then Harry straightened up and breathed in, simultaneously Y/N opened her mouth.
“I—“
“Are you— oh, sorry.”
“No, you go on,” she urged, waving a dismissive hand at him.
Harry smiled, “are you okay?”
“Uh, yes. Yeah, I am actually. Bit of a headache but that‘s expected. Thanks for…picking me up, I guess. I didn‘t want to be a burden, but I kind of told Andrew about you and he got a hold of my phone…“
Harry’s eyebrows drew together, “no, I’m glad he called. You should always reach out to me when you’re in trouble.”
“Yeah, but last time didn’t go over very well, so…”
Harry cleared his throat. “Right, I’m sorry about that. I was out of line, but that doesn‘t mean I don‘t want you to call when you need help getting home. There’s nothing more important than your safety, Y/N.”
“Yeah, but…” Y/N shook her head, overwhelming thoughts swirling endlessly inside rendering her speechless. There wasn’t anything she could say to efficiently express these concerns to him— Y/N had always been bad at communication and the last thing she wanted was to poke the bear even more.
“No go on, tell me.”
“I just… I don’t know. I felt like shit after last time.”
“I know,” he breathed out lowly, “I know you did, and I’m sorry. I didn‘t mean it.”
“But clearly you did if you felt the need to say it. I mean, it doesn’t just come out of nowhere, those accusations. You felt them. And I was thinking about it all day yesterday and… you were probably right, we are too unprofessional.”
“No, sweetheart. I enjoy our dinner sessions and I appreciate that you feel comfortable to talk to me when something bothers you—“ It didn’t matter, though. There was nothing he could say to change her mind.
The words that left her mouth were mostly involuntary. They were a protective barrier, a reason to say no, back off and a clear indication that she had no capacity for this. And although it hurt somewhere deep within her chest to express them, to become a viscous reminder of last night, especially when Harry’s eyebrows drew together in deep regret, it needed to be said.
“Harry, I meant it when I quit last night.”
A reasonable response was lost on Harry. For a moment he needed to think, to gather his thoughts— not that there were very many. He had to admit, he’d hoped they would gloss over her drunken text and pretend as though it hadn’t been. He’d hoped that Y/N felt a small spark of embarrassment when she thought about it, that she looked back on it with regret. Alas, she didn’t.
“Oh.”
He pulled back, shoulders tensing when the gravity of her statement had pulled him down along with it.
“Yeah. I mean, I love working with Jamie, I do, but I—“ I’m scared that I’ll form an attachment I will never recover from. I’m scared of the proximity we share, of how sometimes you let your fingers brush over my thigh. I’m scared because I don’t know what you mean, scared because psychoanalyzing doesn’t work on you. Or maybe— maybe I’m scared of love. With you. Or with anyone. Maybe I’m not capable of being loved. And maybe I’m not even capable of loving and maybe— just maybe, this will be the end of me. And for what? For you to say that the affection you extend to me is customary? That I have a tainted perception of reality, of love? Because I know I do. I know I do, and yet hearing it from you would hurt much more. And so maybe… maybe in this case, finding out isn’t worth the hassle. You’ll probably find I’m not either.
There was so much to say and such little capacity to say it. All Y/N could think to do was sputter words she didn’t mean and hope he understood because the alternative was ridding herself of every. little string of dignity she still possessed and she simply couldn’t do that. She couldn’t allow herself to unfold in front of the only person who’s perception of her she wanted to nurture most. No one had stayed. Even if he would come to leave, she wanted him to leave with a sound picture of her.
“But you…”
“I can’t.”
“You can’t… because of yesterday?”
“No. I mean, I guess that was a bit of an eye opener, but I—“ Y/N breathed in, “I think I’m getting too attached to you. You and Jamie.”
His eyes widened just a bit and he took a small step toward her. It was so small she hardly felt him entering her space. “I don’t mind that, Y/N, you don’t need to quit—“
“I do though,” she interrupted him, a stern undertone to her voice. She coughed and said again, “I mind.”
“I think you’re still angry about yesterday.”
She had to contain the urge to roll her eyes, “I’m not. This is separate from that.”
“So it’s the attachment that’s the problem?”
“Yes.”
Harry scoffed, “that’s ridiculous. There’s nothing wrong with attachment.”
“It depends on what kind, doesn’t it?”
“Enlighten me then.”
Y/N’s mouth closed. She couldn’t do that.
So she deflected.
“Harry, my contract says that as long as I stay long enough to find a fitting replacement—“
“Fuck the contract, Y/N,” the volume of his voice almost caused Y/N to flinch into herself, “I know what my contract says. What I don’t know is why you’re giving up a job that you love, a job that pays you well, for reasons you can’t even explain to me.”
“Is my resignation not enough for you? Would hearing my reasoning really change anything if I will keep insisting on resigning no matter how often you’ll advise me against it? I doubt it matters. I doubt you would even so much as give a shit, Harry."
Y/N shook her head, tears building in the ducts of her eyes. Her father had been of great emotional abuse, her mother had spent half of her life drinking herself to liver failure and her brother had moved to Madrid as soon as he’d turned eighteen, leaving Y/N to fend for herself in a household that contained not one ounce of love— and yet this felt worse. This felt like her heart was being ripped from her chest, dropped on the floor beating and bleeding.
“You think I don’t give a shit? Really?” Y/N couldn’t help rolling her eyes, huffing when he tapped her on the wrist, muttering with a steady furrow in his brow, “don’t roll your eyes at me.”
“You know why I’m quitting and yet you want to hear it come out of my mouth. I’m not going to do it.”
“I don’t know.”
She almost laughed, “sure”
“Sweetheart—“
“Don’t call me that.” She gave him a sharp glance before heading back to her bedroom, arms falling to the sides of her timid frame. Harry stopped her just short of the door, a steady hand gripping around her wrist. She couldn’t help the gasp that left her mouth, built up tears finally streaming down in heaps— embarrassment brewed in her stomach and she couldn’t bare to look him in the eye anymore. Harry’s touch elicited a spark on her skin, blistering with uncomfortable heat. “What?”
“You’re being rude. I really think you should consider this.”
“There’s nothing to consider, okay?! I… I feel too much for you, there’s too— there’s too much, okay? There’s too fucking mu—“
What would transpire between them next was a kiss. Initiated by Harry.
It was barely a kiss, more of a brushing of the lips— tentative movements, gentle breaths. It was the minimum and yet it was more than enough. There was an electric feeling that dragged through Y/N’s entire body as she closed her eyes and let herself feel. Harry didn’t seem very much like a gentle lover— generous, without doubt, but Y/N had always pictured him as a pin-to-the-wall, bite-to-the-lip type of man and she quickly received confirmation when he began squeezing her hand as if feeling restrained.
Y/N hadn’t kissed many people; less than five, probably, but she could say with certainty that this was already better than all of the other ones combined. She knew why. She knew the reason was that she genuinely liked Harry, that he made her feel things she’d never felt before.
But then again, Harry was her boss. He was off limits, taboo. And he was absolutely out of his mind right now.
“Wait.”
His breath fanned against her chin. “You don’t want me to?”
“No I do, I just—“ she shook her head, thoughts in a disarray like they’d never been before.
“Tell me to stop and I will.”
Her mouth opened but nothing came out, merely staggered breaths as she tried to regain the ability to think. The interruption came when Harry’s phone rang on the counter.
He groaned, took a glance at the screen and broke away when he saw his mother’s name flash as the caller ID.
“Yes?” He called into the speaker, frustration molding his features as he kept on listening. “Yes, okay, tell him I’m on my way. Give me twenty minutes… Love you too, bye.” When he turned to her, phone slipped into his back pocket, she could tell that he yearned to say more, that he yearned for her to say more. She knew he would halt his actions, leave time for her to get her words out before he left for whatever emergency he’d been called in for, that if she only said something he would consider putting her as a second priority after his son. She knew that he would make her feel important. But she said nothing. And nobody, not even the most patient person in the world could work with nothing. “Jamie’s asking for me. I need to go get him.”
She only nodded.
He sighed, running a tired hand down his face. “Alright. I need to go. I’ll see you around, Y/N.”
She stood at exactly the same spot as Harry slammed the door shut, unwavering.
Her heart was still pounding as the words she should’ve expressed minutes ago died on her lips.
—
Résumés had been sent to him, interviews were lined up, and Y/N had received no reply back. She hadn’t received anything, really, just a text on Thursday that he would arrange for another babysitter to come in for Jamie while he left for his late meeting, to which Y/N had typed a dry ‘ok’ and left it to sit in her inbox.
The week had started fresh and Y/N had finally left home again (only to her classes, but still). After days of not working, she was scheduled to pick up Jamie at two thirty and hoped for these last weeks to resume seamlessly. She’d gotten the car from the house, locked the door back up again and made the ten minute drive down— everything was fine.
Until now. Until Y/N set foot on preschool grounds and noticed another woman hugging her arms around Jamie’s shoulders. She seemed unfamiliar at first— glasses tipped back on her long blonde hair, a pencil skirt concealing her toned legs. Y/N had no idea who she was dealing with until she took a closer look and recognized this woman to be Stacie. Y/N had seen a picture of Stacie up in Harry’s study— she seemed to have changed a little, but the structural features she associated with her still remained intact through all these years (big blue eyes, defined cheekbones).
As soon as Jamie’s eyes set on Y/N, though, Stacie’s hands were torn away from his shoulders as he ran for her. She got on her knees, his familiar smile melting away all of the cold spots she’d developed in over a week of not seeing him.
“I miss you!” Jamie pulled away to plant a kiss right on the top of the apple of Y/N’s cheek, something he only started doing recently. She guessed he’d only really learned how to. “Daddy said you pick me up today.”
“I missed you too, buddy. I see somebody else came to see you?”
“Oh, Stacie. She wants to take me home but daddy said you pick me up.”
“Yeah, okay. Do you want to wait a second while I talk to her?”
Jamie nodded, moving to stand next to her (small hand clutched in hers, of course) while Y/N greeted Stacie. Well, greet was a bit of an exaggeration; she didn’t get to before Stacie decided to introduce herself first.
“I’m his mom, I called Harry in the morning telling him I’d come for pick up. I have a packed schedule, so I’d appreciate it if you could let go of my child.”
Y/N almost laughed, the audacity of this woman a damn near mystery to her. “Wait. Don't talk about him like some sort of property. Harry never told me about anyone else coming to pick up Jamie.”
“He must’ve forgotten. He’s a busy man, I’m sure he would confirm—“
“Well then let’s call him, shall we?”
Stacie wanted to interject, she could tell, but Y/N had dialed way too fast for that to happen. The phone only had to ring once before Harry picked up, his voice coming in clear.
“Hey, you‘ve got Jamie?”
“I’m here at preschool but Stacie showed up before me and wants to take him home. You didn’t tell me, so I…” she trailed off, hoping he’d fill in the blanks.
It seemed to take a minute to click. “Stacie? His mother showed up at school?”
“Yes, was this arranged beforehand or…”
“No. No, don’t let her take him home. Shit, we talked about this last week, I don’t—“
“You… you talked about this last week?” The confusion dripped from Y/N’s voice and all she could hear was Harry’s attempt at concealing profanities. “What did you talk about last week?”
“It doesn’t matter. Just get home, tell her to call me to clear this up. I don’t want Jamie knowing Stacie is his mother yet, okay? So just get out of there before she tells him herself.”
A frown settled over Y/N’s features before she continued to end the call, scoop Jamie up into her arms and walk away after quick word. Stacie protested, but both her and Y/N knew she wouldn’t do much more than that in fear of causing a scene.
Y/N failed to pay attention to Jamie as she fastened the belt on his seat, only registering when she looked back into the rearview mirror and noticed the little pout starting to pull at his small lips.
And when he finally asked her, little quips of fear polishing his quiet tone: “is Stacie my mum?”, all Y/N could do was pretend she hadn’t heard and hope he would forget, knowing he wouldn’t.
—
Y/N bombarded Harry with questions the second he‘d unlocked that front door.
“Y/N—“
“No, I’m entitled to know this time. I’m entitled to know when she ambushes us at preschool. Don’t you want me to know what I’m dealing with if it happens again? That woman almost fucking kidnapped him—“
“Calm down, Y/N. Sit down and I’ll explain it to you.”
She huffed in annoyance, listening nonetheless. She set herself down on one of the kitchen stools and tried to take control of her breathing. She watched as he took a seat opposite her.
“Stacie came to visit last week on Wednesday. She’d called beforehand, asking if it would be okay. She came and we had dinner, we talked some things out while Jamie was in bed. She apologized, asked if we could start working things out again. I agreed under the condition that she would approach the idea of Jamie as a friend first. She said that she would respect my wishes and that she wouldn’t come near him unless I gave my permission. That’s it. So far all Jamie knows is that she’s a friend of mine. I didn’t—god,” Y/N felt bad when Harry buried his head in his hands, itching to reach out in comfort. She chose to play it safe, settling a gentle touch over his thigh. “I didn’t think she’d do this.”
Y/N hadn’t seen Harry this distraught over anything. “I’m sorry. That’s heavy.”
“It’s—“ he sighed, “it’s something I keep having to deal with. All she wants is to have him on the weekends, have him pose as her cute son. But she doesn’t actually care about him.”
Y/N couldn’t do much more than nod. She was caught between playing the comforting role and being honest. She wasn’t sure if this was the place, if her opinion would be welcomed or if it would contribute to Harry’s sorrows. “She seemed… uncooperative when I spoke to her at school. Like she was in a rush or something, it scared me.”
“Yeah, she’s hardheaded.”
“Right.” Y/N pulled her hand away when Harry lifted his head, clearing her throat and averting her eyes. The change in her behavior didn’t go unnoticed, though he knew he shouldn’t ask. “So when you talked… when you agreed to working things out, you meant that in a friendly manner? Or were you going to be… a couple again?”
“We… I don’t know. We kissed— well, she kissed me a few days ago when we met up again for a playdate with Jamie. Never discussed it any further.”
“Do you love her?”
Y/N had begun to hold her breath in, but she didn’t notice it.
Harry did. He noticed the suction of a deep breath and he noticed how his own hands got clammy with sweat.
Harry looked skeptical, as though there was something on his tongue ready to peek out tentatively, only it couldn’t because he had to spare her feelings. Because there was little Y/N, intimidated by everything she’d ever had to face in her lifetime— little Y/N who had rejected him and still expected loyalty. Little Y/N who couldn’t have him, but had always wanted to.
“I think a part of me will always love her. I mean, she gave me Jamie and he’s… the best thing to ever happen to me, really. I love him, and I will always love her for giving birth to him. I will always love her for the good parts of our relationship.”
Y/N hated herself for hating his answer. It was a perfectly reasonable answer, truthful as Y/N expected, yet her mind wandered past the barriers, past the barbed wire. She couldn’t fully grasp how he could still love her— and yet she understood perfectly. There was Jamie, of course, but there were many other things. There was her hair, her bright complexion, the beautiful curve of her hips and the effortless look of her makeup. There was the fashion, the business-casual look that seemed to mesh so well with Harry’s. There was this calling when Y/N pictured the two of them standing side by side, almost like they were destined to be together. She could imagine it perfectly, the many years they had spent together. She could see it. And it looked perfect.
Y/N coughed, head nodding along to his words as if she were listening to instructions and not some heartfelt confession. It felt instinctual, though.
When it came time for her to speak, she let a smile mold her lips into a perfect crescent moon. She never thought faking a smile could hurt more than a physical injury, but she’d been proven wrong. Everything looked intact— Y/N was sure she almost seemed unaffected from the outside. She wasn’t, though, and she wondered if Harry would recognize that.
“That’s… yeah. I get that.”
This was the first time Y/N actually felt the age gap between her and Harry. He sat here, ready to air it out. He spoke about his concerns, about the state of his son, and the only thing she could fret about was herself. Her sadness had no weight, it was too insignificant in comparison to his and it made her feel pathetic. It made her feel young and stupid and pathetic.
Harry deserved better than this. He deserved careful consideration, security for his child. He deserved trust and honesty, a sort of transparency Y/N couldn’t afford to offer to him yet.
“That’s not to say that I want to approach her in that way, especially after today, but…” he trailed off, only finding his words when it’d clicked that she wasn’t responding, “I just want you to understand that it’s complicated.”
Y/N nodded. Then she cleared her throat, ready to rid herself of this spotlight. She always messed up in the spotlight. “Um, Jamie asked me if Stacie was his mum today. I didn’t answer, but you might want to think about what you’ll say to say to him next time. I also sent you a few résumés, I’ve talked to a few people and have set up interviews, the first one is scheduled for tomorrow—“ she visibly flinched when his hand came down on her thigh, “please, Harry. I can’t. Please just let me finish this.”
“Okay.”
A deep breath, “it’s scheduled for tomorrow after you come home from work. Do you want me to come on the call, or are you okay interviewing yourself?”
“I’d like you to come.”
“Okay. I’ll stay longer tomorrow.”
“Can we talk about us now? Properly?”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
Harry almost laughed, “there’s a lot to talk about. We just added on a good bit today.”
“I’m quitting. That’s it.”
“You know, I don’t understand why you insist that there’s nothing going on—“
“Because there isn’t,” she snapped. “There isn’t. I’m going to check up on Jamie.”
She was teary-eyed as she slipped from the stool, ready to conceal it all for the ball of sunshine sitting in the next room. She could do it all for Jamie— she would do it all.
Before he could say any more, Y/N disappeared behind the door. Harry could hear the two of them converse in the next room and his heart felt heavy as the gravity of the situation dawned on him. Harry had always known what to do— he was a CEO, for god’s sake. He was trained to find solutions, take control of seemingly unfixable problems, to make life easy. And yet, this girl thoroughly baffled him. He had no idea what the fuck to do anymore.
And yet, he was determined to keep trying.
—
Two people had interviewed over zoom and Harry had hated every one of them. His excuses were vague, something about the lack of experience (even though they both knew that Y/N hadn’t had any when she’d started either) and the supposed ‘wrong vibe’. One time he’d criticized a woman for her ‘ridiculously shrill voice’, at which point Y/N had rolled her eyes and proceeded to walk home in a fury.
The next day Y/N showed up again, ready to interview three more people. She sat beside Harry as he set up the video call and listened as he asked questions. Y/N was mostly in attendance to listen and give her honest feedback by the end (she really did want to find someone spectacular for Jamie), so the difficult part came later. For now she could be quiet.
This woman, aside from qualified, seemed very kind. So far, it’d been the best candidate.
“So how flexible is time for you?”
“Very. I do online classes for uni, so I can very well manage my time how I see fit.”
“That sounds fine. And you’ve had plenty of experience, I see.”
“Yes, I started babysitting when I was fourteen, so for more than ten years now. The last family I worked for just moved out of the country, which is why I’m looking for something new, but I was with them three years.”
This woman had nothing but good evidence she would be the best for the job; no doubt better than Y/N. She had the experience, she seemed mature, she looked kind— she would act in a professional manner, something Y/N had never quite figured out yet.
That didn’t matter to Harry, though, because as soon as she’d gotten off the call, he muttered a ‘no’.
“Why not?” Y/N asked, bewildered by his blunt response, “she was literally perfect for the job.”
Harry lifted his shoulders in a shrug, busying himself with his laptop, “just didn’t feel right.”
“Okay, this is just getting too unreasonable at this point. You didn’t like the lack of experience, fine, that one woman’s shrill voice, fine— but this? She just didn’t feel right?”
“I don’t expect you to understand—“
“No. We’re not doing that.”
“It’s a feeling, Y/N. When I interviewed you, I got the feeling that it’s right, that I’d feel safe leaving Jamie with you. It takes trust.”
“But she’s— she’s so qualified, she—“
“Experience isn’t everything. It’s important, but not everything. You weren’t experienced when you came for your interview but you gave me the right feeling. Thus you were qualified for the job.”
And she understood, really, but it still fucking pissed her off. “That’s fucking— you’re being too picky.”
“For good reason.”
“At least two of the people we interviewed were qualified enough for a test run.”
“We still have about fifteen to go and there’s no rush.”
Y/N found this ridiculous. She muttered under her breath, pushing some hair back with a sweaty palm.
“Why is it that everything I do makes you angry?”
“Because you’re fucking infuriating.”
He breathed a chuckle, “that’s nice,” and closed his laptop. “Are you hungry?”
“No.”
“Don’t lie to me. I’ll make your favorite pasta.”
“I don’t—“ but Harry had already gotten to work, tuning her voice out without much trouble. He smiled at her, almost mocking.
“Do you have another job lined up?“
“Uh,” Y/N didn’t want to admit no, that she hadn’t even begun looking properly (save for that one café down the street from her apartment), knowing the consequences and aware of the tiring reprimanding from Harry ahead. A pitied glance. A pathetic speech. “I’ve applied.”
“Where?”
“A cafe.”
“Where?”
“You wouldn’t know it.”
“Are you hired?”
She huffed, “no.”
“Where else?”
“Um, a… another café. It’s in... near my apartment.”
“Would be bad if it wasn’t,” he quipped, paying her a shortened glance from over his cooking pot. “Do you need help?”
“No.”
“Financial help, maybe?”
Y/N groaned, “no.”
“Because I wouldn’t mind sending you some money—“
“Harry,” she cut him off in an instant, glaring daggers at him, “I’ll just send it back. I’ve saved up enough to get by for a few weeks.“
“That doesn’t exactly ease my—“
“Can we just— can we not?”
And they didn’t. Harry closed his mouth— forced it closed, actually— having to clench his jaw to stop himself from voicing unwanted thoughts. Y/N looked away, pretending this conversation hadn’t happened at all. It was easier that way, to pretend he hadn’t conveyed such an open and honest display of care, to pretend that it hadn’t ripped her heart to shreds.
There was so much he wanted to say, but he couldn't. It was the first time in a while that Y/N stayed (somewhat voluntarily) after her shift, and he couldn't risk pushing her away further.
For now, he had to be okay with this.
—
Y/N couldn‘t keep her eyes off of Harry, images of last night flashing in between conflicting thoughts.
She was in bed. She was clutching her blanket, a wet spot and the outline of her body marked by sweat on the sheets. He‘d looked so real fucking her, he‘d sounded so genuine whispering into her ear as he thrust up into her cunt.
He‘d called her a good girl, and she‘d run with it, afraid to look back.
But it hadn‘t been real, had it?
It‘d been a dream. But god, was it a good one.
Would he do it all the same? Would be hold her close, spreading his fingers over the expanse of her breast as he kissed her neck? Would he glide them up, and wrap them around her throat? Would he— fuck. No. She couldn’t.
But he would. And they‘d look so pretty resting there. And she‘d feel so pretty as he overwhelmed her with his presence, his chest pressing against hers. He‘d look so right as he danced along the fine line of praise and degradation— the line of rough and sweet, cold and warm. Because he would know. He would know exactly what she would need.
Wouldn‘t he?
He would. As she watched him move through the space of his living room, she knew he would. She‘d always known, really.
And Jamie wasn’t here anymore, he’d fled up the stairs. And Y/N really, really shouldn’t be here with him alone.
She was biting on her nails, eyes cast downwards in avoidance as Harry read his book on the other end of the couch. He had an arm stretched along the back of the couch and her legs were tucked to her chest as she scrolled on her phone, trying her hardest not to let her gaze run wild. It proved especially difficult when his arm fell mere inches from her legs. And when he touched her, warm thumb rubbing comforting circles into the cold of her skin, she couldn’t help biting her lip.
“You okay?”
“Hm? Yes. Why?”
A smile stretched his mouth wide, “just seem distracted, is all. Squirmy.”
“What? No, I’m fine.”
God, she was feeling small under his gaze.
“You sure?”
“Yes,” she mumbled. Harry saw her eyes, though, tired dark circles resting where they didn’t belong. He saw how they widened, how desperate they seemed for something she didn’t want to disclose to him and he wanted so badly to satisfy that need for her. “I should go home.”
His grip tightened ever so slightly. “Would you like me to drive you?”
“Um, no. It’s okay. Thank you.”
But she failed to move.
Y/N had shut him out for so long that the effect he’d always had on her multiplied by ten. It was much much worse and the finger on her leg burned through her skin with ease.
“Sweetheart?”
“Hm?”
“Come here,” he demanded softly, watching as a war unfolded on her face. He could read her like a book, sensing the exact moment her heart won and her head gave up. He pulled her to him, fingers dancing up and down her shoulder. “You seem tired.”
Y/N cleared her throat, tips of fingers holding onto the edge of safety and threatening to let her cascade into the depths of danger. “I had three classes in the morning and I’ve been writing this paper, so—“ she allowed him control as he made her face the other way, legs outstretched, her back just inches from his chest and his hands massaging her tense shoulders. Her eyes closed in pleasure at the sensation. “And last night, I—“
“Last night you what?”
“I had… I had this dream and—“
She didn’t want to finish and he didn’t need her to.
“Is this okay?”
His voice felt soft and comfortable against her neck. “Yes, thank you. You’re good at that.”
He hummed.
“I really should go home though,” she mumbled, getting quieter with each word. She knew she wouldn’t dare push him away now, but she supposed it was more about convincing herself that she’d tried. “Cause I have classes early in the morning.”
“It’s only seven.”
“Yeah.”
Harry snickered quietly, her awful try at resistance not surprising him in the least. He had never seen her quite like this though, weak and smitten in his arms, on the verge of purring like a cat. He definitely couldn’t complain when she inched closer and dropped her head back so it could rest comfortably on his shoulder.
“Can you do my arms?”
“Of course, baby.”
She could’ve melted. In fact, she probably had without noticing.
And when she felt his lips pressing to her skin… well, then it was game over.
“Is this okay?”
She nodded promptly, heart racing.
Y/N was tired of rejecting this feeling, tired of pretending as though she didn’t want or need Harry’s affection. Because truly, it was all she wanted, all she’d longed for.
A love like his would feel so great.
“You look really beautiful, you know that?”
“Thank you,” she squeaked, sensing Harry’s chuckle rolling against her back at the response.
“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.”
“Me neither.”
“You’re the one who keeps running.”
“I know.”
“Why?”
Y/N took her time answering, grateful when Harry didn’t rush her. He would sit here waiting for an hour if he needed to, she was confident in that. There was no hurry, just soft hands on scalps and warm kisses on necks— Y/N hadn’t experienced such an overwhelming feeling of comfort in the arms of a man.
“I’m scared to stay.”
He sounded unfazed, giving her a surge of confidence when he asked, “why?”
“Because we’re such different people. You’re a dad, a very accomplished ceo. I’m a student, so much younger—“
“Don’t make me out to be so old, love.”
Her eyes rolled. “A little younger than you. And last week when I saw Stacie, I don’t know… it did something with my brain, I guess. You seemed so right together, you know? I didn’t want you to wake up one day and regret anything, don’t think I could bear that.”
“Look at me,” he muttered, tilting her head so that he could pin her down with a stern stare, “I couldn’t regret you, sweetheart. I regret much in life, but I wouldn’t regret you.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Eh, I’m a pretty good judge of character.”
“Harry,” she warned, “I’m not the most lovable person once you get to know me.”
“I doubt that,” he retorted.
“Past experiences have proven as much.”
He gave gentle strokes to her cheek, a glaze he didn‘t expect overcoming her eyes, pulling him in, “so let me show you.”
Y/N’s breath hitched, his nose mere inches away from hers. “Show me what?”
“How easy it is to love you.”
Time stood still, but it couldn’t not have with a statement of that kind. It seemed so easy for him to brush off concerns as something undeserving of thought, to create an allusion of simplicity where it didn‘t belong. Those words meant everything to her.
“You must know how wonderful that sounds coming from your mouth.”
Harry breathed a chuckle, nose nudging against hers softly. When he asked for permission, Y/N couldn’t deny him of another kiss.
And if it could’ve gotten any better than their first kiss, then it definitely had. There was a newfound sense of freedom and security with this kiss, unspoken thoughts reduced to small details rather than what had been when they’d spent time together last.
When they parted, nothing needed to be said. They already knew it all.
—
A month later.
“Y/N, will you hand me another bowl for the soup, please?”
As Y/N fulfilled Harry’s plea, she couldn’t help but let giddiness dictate her movements. Things were fresh, things were good— but they were also scary. He was scary. Anxious butterflies spread in her lower tummy at the mention of his name and infested it with the low sound of his voice.
She waited by his side as he tidied up, ready to be of assistance. It was pathetic, really, how awfully smitten she’d become for him.
“Thank you, sweetheart.”
She hummed in reply, scared that if she were to speak all that would come out was a squeak. Harry chuckled, smirk molding into his cheekbones as he grasped Y/N by the waist and pushed his lips against hers in a gentle kiss. His hand slid lower, giving her a squeeze.
“Are you nervous?”
“Yeah.”
“It’ll be great, I promise. And whatever he says, we’ll work it out.”
“Okay,” a surge of confidence rode her to sunny dry shores, shoulders sacking in comfort, “yeah, okay. I trust you.”
“You ready then?”
“Yes.”
Things proceeded as they always had; Y/N and Jamie shared funny anecdotes of their day as Harry mostly listened, admiring the two of them with love filling his eyes. It wasn’t until desert had come that the setting changed, unbeknownst to Jamie, and Harry took the lead.
“Jamie, we want to talk to you about something.”
Jamie stared between the two of them, waiting.
“Do you remember when you came home from school and told me about Katie and Josh? That they’re boyfriend girlfriend?”
“Yes, they still are.”
Harry chuckled, “and do you remember what I said when you asked if I had a girlfriend?”
“You said that you don’t.”
“I did. And while that may have been true for that moment, things have changed.”
Her heart melted and sank all the same when his little green eyes lit up, “do you have a girlfriend now?”
“I do,” Harry laughed, “you know her.”
“Who?”
Harry smirked, motioning to Y/N with a nod of his head to draw Jamie’s attention away. Jamie’s gaze landed on Y/N and in the matter of a second it filled with excitement. His mouth dropped open in surprise.
“Are you okay with that?” She asked, timid at first but becoming more confident when a genuine smile imprinted small dimples in his cheeks, a feature he’d been lucky enough to receive from his father.
He nodded, full of movement, and hummed in confirmation.
When Y/N and Harry had put Jamie into bed later that night, and had vacated to the kitchen to enjoy a glass of wine together, things finally fell into place. The thought of happiness within a relationship was no longer a distant one— no, it had become a reality. Harry had kept up with his promise, he had shown her easy, he’d shown her effortless, and while there was no doubt in her mind that hard times were still to come, she was confident that no matter the circumstance, her gratitude for his open portrayal of love could never be put into question.
“I love you,” she shared, eyes glassy, head tilted. “You don’t have to say it back, but I just want you to know. I think I’ve loved you for quite some time, I just didn’t want to realize it.”
The silence was short lived.
He placed his glass back down on the table and smiled, though to her it almost looked awkward. “Wow.”
“I know, you don’t have to… cause I know it’s a big deal, so you don’t have to say anything.”
“I do too,” he then offered, hand traveling to rest on her knee. “I love you.”
“Really?”
“I do.”
This stumped her.
And now it was her turn: “wow.”
Harry’s laughter spread everywhere on Y/N’s skin, engraving itself into her soul and staying there to be kept and remembered forever.
“Good. Now that that’s cleared…”
She couldn’t deny him of a passionate make-out session, hands on thighs and lips everywhere they fit, everywhere they felt right. A moan slipped from her mouth, his smirk molded into her hot skin.
“Move in with me,” he muttered, dirty against her mouth, “we’re finding a new nanny for Jamie and you don’t have a new job planned yet. Just focus on university, move in with me, with us. Let me take care of you.“
“Harry—“ his mouth collided against her neck, her eyes closed shut, “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”
“Why?”
“We’ve only been together—“
“Doesn’t matter, I’ve fought for a long time to have you. I believe in us, I trust this.”
“I…“ Y/N felt torn— on one hand, she really wanted to move in with him. On the other, was that really wise? To move in with a man after a month of dating him? Albeit this was Harry, and she trusted him too. Fully. It was herself she didn’t trust. “Are you sure?”
And when she looked into his eyes, there was no not one ounce of doubt in them. They welcomed her.
“Jamie would love it just as much as me.”
“Would he?”
“Are you kidding me? He loves you so much.”
“I love him too,” she played with a strand of his hair.
“Then move in with us.”
A smile began to pull at her lips. “But I pay for groceries.”
“No,” he mumbled, “you’re too broke for me to let you do that.”
“Harry!”
“It’s true!” He laughed, massaging her thigh. “Baby, I don’t expect you to pay for anything living here. I’m more than capable—“
“I know you’re capable, but I just… I was taught not to burden other people.”
“You’re not burdening me,” he insisted, finger sliding under her chin, “it’s okay to let other people do things for you. It’s okay for others to show their love.”
“I know that.”
“So please don’t worry about it. Focus on your studies and make me proud in that way.”
“I need to make money somehow.”
“No you don’t. I’ll support you.”
“No,” she breathed right away, “I won’t depend on you for money. You’re not my… my sugar daddy.”
“Why not?” He grinned, “you call me daddy either way—“
Y/N’s eyes rolled, “shut up.”
“Told you not to roll your eyes at me.”
“Sorry.”
Harry hummed, “try it for a month. If you want to move in after, you can. If you don’t, I’ll help you find a new place. Or I’ll pay your rent while you’re here so you don’t lose out on money.”
Comfortable silence dictated the next few seconds as Y/N thought about her boyfriend’s offer, and then: “fine. We’ll try it for a month.”
Harry’s smile widened, “yeah?”
“Yes.”
“You won’t regret it."
He'd been right.
--
The end! Would love to hear your feedback :) but also like… don’t be too harsh cause I can’t handle it
tags:
@tpwk-mia @gem1712 @behindmygreyeyes, @sinarainbows @infixinfinity @adkmermaid2399 @daphnesutton @imaginexxharry @bry211 @haliastyles @watarmelon212 @impossibleme @cali-888 @dreamybabbyy @evie-119 @cumuluscranium @c-a-b3002 @buckybarnessimpp @freckles-things @harryedwardstylesluva24 @ihavesimpedovermanyfictionalmen @angelbunny222 @ivegotthecinema @harryscowgirl
I hope I didn’t forget anyone!
#harry styles#harry styles angst#harry styles fan fiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fic#harry styles x you#harry styles one shot#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x reader#harry styles fluff#harry styles series#harry styles materlist#harry styles x plus size reader#harry styles x nanny#harry styles ceo#harry styles fanfic rec
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a/n: this fic really only happened bc @youunravelme sent the pic of mat in the brown suit and said he looks like he could be carrying a diaper bag 😂 and then my mat and squeaks-loving heart ran with that! i’ve been telling their story in bits and pieces and out of order, but this story has more mention of squeaks’ mental state post-partum
word count: 4.2k
tw: mentions of post-partum anxiety, mentions of being on anti-anxiety medication, body image issues,
summary: being a bridesmaid in a wedding out east is the perfect reason for a little family and friends getaway, but you can’t completely let go of your anxieties
You should be having fun, getting ready with the girls and having your hair and makeup done, but your chest feels tight and you’re finding it hard to breathe.
Maybe air. You need air.
Rubbing at your sternum with one hand curled into a fist, you wander over to the French doors of the bridal suite, pushing them open and sticking your head out onto the balcony. The slight breeze off of Sag Harbor Bay is helping, the salty air cool and taking an edge off the mid-July heat.
A cool hand lands on your shoulder and you jump, turning slightly to see Kristy’s concerned face. “Are you okay?” She asks, a furrow between her eyebrows.
“I…yes? No?” You falter, fist still pressed against your chest. You recognize the anxiety symptoms, familiar as they are, but you’re not sure what triggered it. You’d been laughing just a few minutes ago, all the bridesmaids getting the final touches before heading out to line up for the ceremony.
“How about some water?” Kristy’s already uncapping a water bottle and handing it to you as she speaks, a mom multitasking.
You’re sipping at the water, your head spinning a little bit, when there’s a knock on the door to the suite. You can’t see who’s at the door, but you do hear Syd call your name, laughing, “we have an uninvited husband and baby here.”
“Oh!” You don’t have to see Mat and Talia for the knot in your chest to ease and for your breathing to get easier. They’re exactly who you needed and you don’t waste any time in hurrying as fast as your heeled feet will take you towards the door to the suite.
Mat’s hovering at the door, looking handsome and polished in his suit, a far cry from the disheveled, bed-headed mess you’d left behind at the Martins’ Hamptons home this morning. He’s got Talia in his arms, her back against his chest so she can see everything that’s going on. Syd’s squishing her little cheeks, making your fifteen-month-old giggle wildly and wriggle in Mat’s arms. The skirt of her summery floral dress is bunched up under Mat’s forearm, exposing chunky toddler legs.
“Hey!” Mat looks up and grins at you, the delighted expression on his face flickering when he sees whatever expression is on yours.
“Mama!” Talia shrieks and lunges for you, Mat’s arms tightening reflexively around the wiggly toddler.
Syd laughs and gives her a noisy kiss on the cheek. “Aunt Syd doesn’t hold a candle to Mom, I guess,” she shrugs and you offer her a faint smile.
“She’ll change her mind in like twenty minutes,” you joke, reaching out for her and stepping into Mat’s personal space. “Hi, Bug. Having a good morning with Daddy? I’ve missed you.” There’s a wobble to your voice and Mat doesn’t miss it.
“Hey,” he ducks his head closer to yours, his cheek brushing against the side of Talia’s head, “what’s going on? Are you okay?”
It’s the exact same question Kristy asked a few minutes ago, but when Mat asks it, you can’t help the tears that well up in your lash line or the hiccuping sob that escapes your lips even as you try to press them together.
Mat’s face immediately falls and he quickly kisses the side of Talia’s head, murmuring to her, “you’re gonna hang with Aunt Syd for a minute, okay, Bug?”
“No!” You nearly yelp, holding Talia’s fingers tighter. You don’t want her out of your sight. “No,” you repeat, quieter. “Just…just let me hang out with her for a minute.”
Talia chants her few words, mamas and dadas falling happily from her smiling mouth, her hands tucked in yours. You can feel the anxiety seep from your body, your shoulders lowering from your ears.
Mat nods and he secures Talia against his chest with one arm so he can cup your cheek with the other hand. His thumb brushes softly against your cheekbone and you lean into his touch, barely concerned about the layer of makeup coating your skin. “You were okay this morning,” he says, a statement that sounds more like a question.
“Mhm,” you hum a reply, smiling widely at Talia and brushing her dark curls off her face. She scrunches up her face and squeals when you tickle her cheeks. “I…I was okay until a few minutes ago, honestly. I don’t know, Mat.” You lift one shoulder in a shrug, knowing that your anxiety is unpredictable lately, less constant than in the months following Talia’s birth, but no less severe when the attacks hit.
Talia reaches for the chain of your necklace, tangling her little fingers in the fine metal, and you finally take her from Mat’s arms, only slightly concerned about wrinkling the chiffon of your lavender bridesmaid dress. She curls up against your chest, her head fitting perfectly under your chin, and you have to swallow back another wave of emotion.
He leans slightly against the doorframe and studies your face. After a beat, he says, “do you think you’re tapering off the Lexapro too fast?”
It’s been three months since you started tapering off, guided by your doctor’s advice, and it’s been hard. Easier now that it’s summertime and Mat’s around every day.
You shrug, shake your head. “I don’t think so, no? I took it this morning anyway,” you sigh, pressing your cheek against the top of Talia’s head. She’s wiggling in your arms, fighting to get loose and run around. “I’ve never been away from her for this long.”
“It’s only been eight hours,” Mat raises an eyebrow. His hand is on your hip now, stroking gently, and you try not to think about the layers of Spanx under your dress, the way your hips have spread since Talia’s birth, the stubborn ten pounds that won’t go away. You’re back in your pre-pregnancy size, technically, but you just don’t feel right in your skin yet and the bridesmaid dress is only serving to emphasize just how off you feel. The extra padding at your hips and chest feels strange to you, even though Mat’s proven time and time again that he can’t keep his hands off of you, no matter your size.
“Yeah,” you agree. “But she’s always with me, all day.”
Mat sighs your name. There’s a little defensiveness in the slope of his shoulders now. “I have her though,” he says. “I can handle her alone.”
“I know,” the words spill out, “I know you do! You’re the best dad, Mat. I just…feel like…like? It’s not that I didn’t think you were okay, I missed her. It’s scary, not to have her with me.” The hiccuping sob is back, shaking your voice, and you have to hoist Talia higher up on your hip. She’s babbling to herself, wiggling around, and you know you should let her toddle around to get some of her energy out before the ceremony, but you can’t seem to let her go.
You bite down hard on the inside of your cheek, trying not to think of the days she was in the NICU, when Mat was gone. You thought you were over that hump, worked through the trauma with your therapist and with Mat, but for whatever reason, today is really hard.
“Hey,” Mat reaches up and brushes at your cheek, wiping a tear away, “I know. Squeaks, I know. But she’s here and she’s okay and you’re not a bad mom.”
“Maybe I wasn’t ready for this,” you huff, embarrassment starting to settle in your stomach. You’re being dramatic. You’d said yes to being a bridesmaid before you even knew you were pregnant with Talia and even after her birth, since Syd and Kristy were also bridesmaids, you’d figured you would be okay surrounded by your friends.
Mat leans in to kiss the corner of your mouth, mindful of your lipstick. “You’re fine. Just a bad brain moment,” he mumbles, using your therapist’s phrase for your anxiety. “T and I are going to be cool during the ceremony and then the three of us will party it up with everyone else, okay?”
“Okay,” you nod, squeezing Talia one more time - getting an outraged squawk from her in return - before passing her back to Mat. They give you matching scrunch-faced smiles and you return a watery smile.
“Say bye to Mommy,” Mat jiggles Talia a bit and she giggles, waving and chanting a ‘bye bye, Mama’ in her sweet little voice.
“Bye bye, baby,” you wave back, your smile more natural now.
Mat leans in for one more quick kiss, Talia shrieking a giggle as she swoops forward in his arms. “You look beautiful,” he whispers against your cheek. “Lucky me, I get to go home with the hottest bridesmaid.”
Normally you’d roll your eyes at his flirting, but today you really needed the compliment. Your stomach warms and you smile gratefully at him.
He and Talia wave at you and she blows kisses, making you laugh as they head down the hallway and off to the outside patio where the ceremony will take place.
You’re feeling better after seeing them and when Syd and Kristy drag you back into the festivities and photographs, it’s fun again.
Mat’s sitting with Casey, Matt, and the kids towards the back of the crowd - daddy dare care while the moms are busy in the bridal party. You catch sight of Mat’s dark head immediately and your heartbeat kicks a little when you spot Talia’s matching dark hair over his shoulder. She’s standing on his thighs, her hands in his for balance, and when she sees you walking down the aisle, she shouts and waves at you, nearly losing her balance and tipping off of Mat’s lap. Casey’s hands shoot out and steady her before she can really go anywhere and you exhale in relief.
You wave at her behind your bouquet, an easy smile on your face.
The ceremony is a blur, your focus on Mat and Talia in the back. Towards the end, he has to slip out quickly with the diaper bag on his shoulder, but he’s back a few minutes later, shooting you a quick thumbs up.
By the time you get inside after photographs, cocktail hour is winding down. You, Syd, and Kristy find your little group immediately - Jack, Reese, and Winnie in a little dance circle in the corner even though there’s no real music playing. Alice, Cole, and Talia are looking rough, interrupted naps and a long day getting the best of the younger crowd.
“Hi!” You call out, setting your bouquet on the table the guys have commandeered, reaching out immediately for Talia. Mat offers her up easily and she clings to you like a little koala. “Missed you, baby,” you murmur, kissing the top of her head.
She’s got a handful of squished French fries, which you didn’t realize until her fingers loosen and a couple of them fall down the top of your dress.
“Ah,” you wince when the cold potato touches your skin. Mat snorts at the look on your face and stands up with a napkin to wipe off Talia’s hands.
“Am I allowed to stick my hands down your top to clean you up or is that public indecency?” He asks with a cheeky smile. There’s a smudge of red on his jaw - ketchup, most likely, and you smirk a little, amused that neither Matt nor Casey felt like telling him about it.
Before you can answer, all four of your friends chime in together, “public indecency,” earning an eye roll from Mat.
He ignores them and blocks your body with his so no one can see his hand disappear into your bra. He fishes out the fries and tweaks your nipple on the way out. You turn a gasp into a cough and glare at him. His answering smile is all faux-innocence.
“Now that you two are done being gross,” Matt rolls his eyes, even though he’s smiling, “are you ready to head in?”
The group is ushered into the main reception hall, floor to ceiling windows giving a gorgeous view of the water and the sun as it dips towards the horizon. The kids run off, pointed towards their table by Syd, and the adults head to the table right next to it, the toddler group accompanying. Talia slumps on your lap, looking like she’s fading a bit, until Mat pulls a piece of his roll off and hands it to her.
She beams at him and you make an attempt to get her to say ‘thank you’ that mostly ends up being gibberish unless she’s saying ‘Dada.’
“Feeling better?” Mat asks quietly, angled in your direction. You reach out to swipe your thumb over his jaw, cleaning off the ketchup, and he frowns down at your hand before huffing a laugh when he sees the condiment smudge.
You nod. “I’m good,” you reassure him with the truth. “I think I just really needed to see T this morning.”
His hand is warm on your knee and he nods, satisfied after he studies your face.
The bride and groom make their entrance, doing away with the entrances for the bridal party except for the maid of honor and the best man, and when it’s time for the couples to join them on the dance floor for the first dance, Mat takes Talia in his arms and after the distribution of kids to adults has happened, you’re dancing with Jack. He looks adorable in his little suit, seriously trying to spin you when he sees Casey twirl Reese.
“Jack, you’re the best dance partner I’ve ever had,” you laugh, helping him out by squatting and twirling under his arm.
He grins at you, showing off a smile of half baby teeth and half-grown in adult teeth. “Make sure you tell Uncle Mat,” he says. “Cause he said he could beat me in a dance contest, but I don’t think he can.”
“I’ll pass along the message,” you grin back. The music speeds up and you start swinging Jack’s arms in wide arcs, making him laugh. You push him out and pull him back in, wrapping him in a hug and tickling his sides. He breaks away and transitions into a few fairly impressive dance moves, including the Robot, which you’d love to know where he learned.
Mat dances over to you, Talia happy in his arms and wiggling along to the music. You take her and shimmy, making her laugh.
“Sick moves, Jacky,” Mat grins, ruffling his blond hair.
“Aunt Squeaks said they’re better than yours,” the seven-year-old shoots back, making an attempt to moonwalk away.
You burst out laughing and Mat turns a betrayed look on you. “Seriously?” He asks. “My moves are amazing!”
“Oh, look,” you smile, turning your head, “dinner’s being served!” It’s not, but it works to make Mat laugh and grab your hand to spin you and Talia in a circle.
Dinner is served a few minutes later and you and Mat trade off on who gets to hold Talia on their lap so the other can eat. Mat ends up with her for a good chunk of the meal, talking over her head and opening his mouth when she tries to reach up and shove a roasted potato past his teeth.
“Hey, cool it, girl,” you laugh, tugging at her hand when she misses his mouth and nearly shoves the potato up his nose. “Daddy doesn’t want to breathe in potato.”
Casey and Matt share a laugh before Matt chimes in, “his nostrils are big enough he’ll be able to breathe around the potato.”
Mat flips them off behind Talia’s back and you join in with their laughter, not even pretending to hide it when Mat turns a betrayed look on you. “My own wife,” he cries dramatically. “No loyalty even in my own home.”
You shrug and feed Talia a piece of your filet mignon. “I can’t fight the truth, baby,” you tease, leaning out of the way when Mat reaches for you to pinch your side.
The dance floor picks up again and you find yourself spinning with Mat’s arms around you, Talia taken by Syd to dance with her and Alice.
“She’s a little party animal,” you laugh, watching her wiggle while holding hands with Alice.
“Gets it from her mom and aunts,” Mat teases, hands low on your back, pulling you flush against his body. You can feel the gentle press of his cock against your hip, semi-hard behind his zipper. “She’s going to be a handful when she’s older, isn’t she?”
You nod. “Oh yeah, I think we’re going to have fun watching her grow up,” you murmur, emotion tightening your throat.
Casey and Matt swing Reese and Winnie in the air, Kristy shimmying with Jack. The little group is all laughter and smiles.
“I’m so glad we were able to do this,” you say after a few seconds. “The mini-vacation, the wedding. I know I freaked out this morning, but it’s nice to be around everyone.”
“Good,” Mat presses a soft kiss to your temple, swaying with you. “I was a little worried, not gonna lie.”
A little knot of guilt tangles in your stomach and you frown into his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” you whisper into the fabric of his shirt. “I know this past year has been…” you trail off, too many adjectives applicable to describe the past year.
Mat laughs faintly, “I know. You don’t have to apologize, I’m just glad we’re pretty much back to normal.”
Over Mat’s shoulder, you watch Jack spin Talia in a circle to make her laugh. She laughs so hard she nearly falls over and your heart skips a beat when it seems like she might hit the ground. Matt catches her back and holds her until she regains her balance, still giggling.
“My mom mentioned coming down for a visit,” Mat continues. “Maybe we can take her up on that, let her babysit and go away for the night, just the two of us?”
There’s something in Mat’s tone, a little cajoling, a little frustrated, a lot hopeful.
You haven’t been away with just Mat since before Talia was born, haven’t even spent more than a handful of hours away from her before this morning, but still, you find yourself nodding. “That sounds nice,” you reply, meaning it.
Mat’s fingers squeeze your hips and you pull back to see his smile, grinning back at him.
It’s not the old normal, but the new normal is pretty nice too.
The night winds down and you leave the reception early, Mat’s jacket draped over your shoulders and Talia passed out in Mat’s arms. You help lead the older kids out to the cars, making sure Reese doesn’t trip over her feet. Everyone gets buckled into their appropriate car seats for the drive back to the Martins’ and you find your eyes closing while Mat drives.
His hand is warm in yours and the radio is playing quietly.
“You look beautiful,” Mat says into the silence.
You crack a small smile and open one eye to look at him. “You said that earlier,” you remind him.
“I wanted to say it again,” he turns to you at the red light and flashes a grin, making your stomach flip with butterflies.
“Well,” you squeeze his hand, “I like hearing it.”
Talia wakes up when you try taking her out of the car, whining and crying for you. Her little hands reach out and you take her from Mat, cuddling her close and stroking her dark curls, hoping she’ll fall back asleep. She’s overtired though and doesn’t settle until all three of you are in bed, her cheek pillowed on your chest and her hands fisted in your shirt.
“Shh,” you hum, quietly starting to tell her a story. She whines and wiggles and Mat drapes his hand over her back too, a warm, heavy weight that’s worked to soothe her since she was born. He tickles her back lightly and scoots closer to you, head propped up on his hand. Talia’s cocooned in between your bodies, her knees tucked up to her chest, and she slowly falls back asleep, her face going slack. Her grip on her stuffed cat loosens, even though the plush toy is wedged under her chin for comfort.
“Sometimes,” you whisper to Mat, looking at him over Talia’s body, “I can’t get over how perfect she is.”
He yawns and nods, dragging the light comforter higher up over you and Talia. “We’re pretty damn lucky,” he agrees. He closes his eyes and curls his body in a c-shape around you and Talia, breathing evening out before long.
You’re tired, but you stay up for a little bit longer, watching your husband and daughter sleep. Your fingers trace the curve of Talia’s nose lightly and she wrinkles it, snuggling closer to you in her sleep. Mat snores softly, his breaths ruffling the back of Talia’s hair.
It makes you emotional, to have your entire heart curled up next to you like this.
With a faint smile on your face, you close your eyes and drift off.
Mat lets you sleep in the next morning and you wake up around eight, with a still hot mug of coffee on the night table and a few rocks and shells next to the mug - Mat must’ve taken Talia out to the beach early. You take your time getting ready, pulling on jean shorts and a tank top over your bathing suit before padding downstairs. Being back in your regular clothes makes you feel more normal than the shapewear and bridesmaid dress from last night. You can ignore the extra few pounds and new shape to your body when you’re just in shorts.
There are pastries on the counter, crumbs and dirty plates indicating that you’re not the first person to wander down for breakfast. You pull off a piece of an almond croissant and pop it into your mouth as you head outside. As soon as you open the back door, you’re treated to the childish laughter and splashing noises from the pool.
“Morning!” Syd calls, waving from a lounge chair. “Come join us.��
Kristy beams at you from the next chair and then almost immediately frowns when Jack cannonballs into the pool, sending a huge splash of water into the air. “Jack! I thought I said no splashing!” She calls as soon as his head pops back above the water.
“But Tal and Cole laugh when I do it,” he argues, pointing at the two youngest, who, sure enough, are cracking up in Mat and Casey’s arms. Mat winks at you and you smile, waving as you take a seat at the edge of the third lounge chair.
“Talia and Cole also laughed when Dad dropped the egg carton, but we’re not going to keep doing that,” Kristy shakes her head.
Jack pouts, but to his credit, stops doing cannonballs and instead commandeers a dragon shaped pool float with Winnie and Reese hanging off the wings, shrieking.
It’s loud and chaotic and it’s perfect.
Mat swims over to the edge, Talia holding onto his hands while she kicks. “Good sleep?” He asks, splashing a little water onto your feet.
“Mhm,” you hum, “thanks for letting me sleep in.”
“Anytime,” he leans back, dragging Talia through the water. “T and I took a nice walk on the beach, chatted about all the birds we saw, picked up lots of treasures for Mommy.”
“Bird!” Talia pipes up, loudly and happily, looking around.
Mat grins at you, inclining his head as if to say ‘see?’
You smile back, giggling a bit, and then Mat kicks off the wall, swimming around and making boat noises while he navigates Talia through the water and around the obstacles of Matt, Casey, and the other kids.
“I love summer dad camp,” Syd sighs, stretching out in her chair. “It’s a nice little break.”
It’s definitely nice to have this summer experience as opposed to last summer’s insanity. You can finally enjoy watching Mat with Talia in the warm weather.
He tosses her a little into the air, catching her before she hits the water, and despite the way your heart lurches, you smile at the sound of her shrieked laughter mixing with Mat’s.
They swim past Matt and Alice reaches for Talia for a high-five, one of Talia’s favorite tricks. She looks startled when her hand keeps going and splashes down into the water, sending droplets flying onto her and Mat’s faces. Your husband laughs and wipes the water from Talia’s face before blowing raspberries against her cheeks.
It’s the cutest fucking thing you’ve ever seen.
You surprise yourself, thinking about a second baby held in Mat’s arms. Neither of you have really talked about it that seriously and you’ve been sort of holding your breath, waiting for your brain and body to feel normal enough to do it all over again. But now, maybe it’s time to really start thinking and talking about a second baby. You do a little quick math in your head, if you get pregnant right away, easy like it was with Talia when you weren’t even trying, Talia would be just around two when a second baby would be born. That’s a nice age difference, even three years like Mat and Liana would be good too.
You chew at your lower lip, watching Mat and Talia. Smiling when she smushes his cheeks in her hands and bonks her forehead against his.
Yeah, a second mini-Mat wouldn’t be so bad.
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I definitely think it takes Eddie a while to accept that Steve changed. He remembers what he was like in high school.
When Steve asks him out, for whatever reason, Eddie says yes. But he’s determined not to fall in love, because deep down Harrington’s still a dick. But he’s cute, and Eddie can smile and play pretend.
But then! Steve goes full happy relationship mode, he tells Robin (obv), introduces Eddie to the other adults as his bf, and is just generally being sweet.
MY SWEET ANON I HOPE YOU'LL STILL SEE THIS!!!
I'm so sorry it took me ages to answer this one! But I really loved the idea of this (the good ol' steddie + misunderstanding about what they mean to each other with a dash of terrible communication skills my beloved) so i wanted to give it my proper attention, which i didn't have enough time for over the past few months. Buuut the words have finally found their way to my keyboard so here is the first part of what probably will turn into a 3-part ficlet, I hope it's something like what you had in mind when you sent this ask to me <3
---
Eddie has been acting weird all day. Maybe Steve is too much of a romantic, but he can't help it: he wanted to celebrate this day. Exactly a month ago, he asked Eddie out. And it's been good. They've spent a lot of time together. They've been on lots of dates, spent plenty of nights together... But today, things are different, somehow. Eddie is different. He turned Steve down for a dinner date, he didn't stop by Family Video during lunchtime, and when Steve shows up at the trailer to surprise him with flowers, he merely frowns and pulls back from their kiss before it can even properly get started.
'Everything alright?' Steve asks, trying to catch his boyfriend's gaze – which isn't exactly easy with how Eddie is turning away from him to not-so-gently put the flowers down in a corner of the trailer's living room.
'Yeah, sure,' Eddie mumbles, not really looking at him. 'It's just – I didn't really expect to see you today. We didn't have plans.'
Steve chuckles, trying to get the tension out of his chest. 'Didn't know I was expected to schedule an appointment before coming here.' He tries to play it off as a joke, but the tone of his voice doesn't really want to cooperate.
Eddie finally turns back towards him and Steve catches the end of an eye-roll.
'I'm just not feeling too great today, alright?' It sounds a bit stiff and Steve pauses. He wonders if he did something wrong, if he somehow invaded Eddie's space – even though he has showed up at the trailer on countless evenings in the past month.
'What's wrong?'
'Nothing,' Eddie answers, a little bit too fast. 'I told you, I'm not feeling so well.'
And now that he can see his face properly, Steve notices that Eddie is indeed looking paler than usual.
'Hey, don't worry about it,' he says. 'I can stay to take care of you, if you want to. We don't have to do anything. You can go to bed early and I'll keep you company. I can make you some soup, read to you... You could've just told me you're not feeling good, you know. I would've picked up some fruit on my way over here and stopped by the library for you.'
'You don't have to do any of that, Steve.'
Steve tries to ignore the fact that it's been ages since Eddie has last called him by his official first name. He doesn't like the sound of it.
'But I want to,' he says instead. He takes a step towards Eddie, lifts his arms to wrap them around him – but Eddie swats his arms away before he can properly embrace him.
'Don't.' He sounds cold and detached, so different from how he usually sounds. 'Don't act like this is something it isn't.'
'Like this is something –' Steve echoes, completely caught off-guard by this turn of events. 'Like what?'
'Jesus Christ, you really don't know when to stop, do you?'
'What?' He takes a stumbling step backwards, driven away by the force in Eddie's words.
'We're not – like that,' Eddie stutters out. 'We're just fucking around, aren't we? So you don't need to pretend. You don't need to bring me flowers. You don't need to take care of me when I'm sick. You don't owe me anything, alright? You can go home.'
Steve takes another step backwards, until his back collides with the door of the trailer. He blindly grabs the door handle behind him.
'Alright,' he says, trying desperately not to let his voice tremble audibly. 'I hear you, loud and clear. I'll – I'll leave you alone, then.'
Read pt2 here (Edit: it's actually 5 parts now. You can read the whole thing on ao3 here)
#don't mind me rambling about stranger things#anon seriously thank you so much for sending this to me!! it's been a great scenario to explore#and my apologies for the angst lmao#but i promise more will follow soon#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#fruity ficlet
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"but, isn't it a blessing to have someone care about you?" your voice was soft but your words weighed heavy on bakugou's heart.
it was nearly ten o'clock. due to your rampant text messages you sent to bakugou ten minutes ago, he stayed up past his normal bedtime in order to figure out what exactly was your issue tonight.
you were rested on the bench that was outside of u.a while bakugou was reclined on the bench, his legs sprawled out in front of him. there was a mere sprinkle that surrounded the area around them, a slight breeze also forcing you two to sit closer together to bask in each other's warmth.
bakugou was unsure what to reply with. where did your random outburst even come from. what did you really want him to say?
bakugou didn't particularly understand love and he damn sure didn't know how to express it. maybe that's why he was okay with it at first— you deserved to be with someone that could make you happy. he knew that he wouldn't be able to live up to your standards. he lacked all the aspects for a healthy relationship.
but when you got together with that stupid guy you met at a coffee shop eight months ago, he felt like an idiot for not pursing you. he noticed all of your tired eyes, insecure smiles, and passive behavior. it was only then when bakugou realized he could’ve done so much better than he thought.
you took his silence as an opportunity to continue. "someone who worries about your happiness and wants to always be by your side?"
yes. bakugou wanted to scream. yes, you fucking idiot. were the words that burned his throat. why couldn't it come out when he so desperately wanted it to?
did you decide to be blind of his feelings towards you? bakugou had thought he'd shown you that he'd go to hell and back for you, but still, you couldn't discern the fact that he was so infatuated with you? he was so in love with you that he would wait for you at the bottom no matter how long it took.
he hated this feeling. why did it have to be you that caught his eye? the only girl he was drawn to, no matter how many times he tried to escape your aura, the path always lead back to you.
he doesn't know why he would sit with you while you ranted about your relationship problems. maybe it was because he didn't want it to be anyone else other than him or because he cared about your well-being most of all. maybe it was both.
either way, he fucked hated it. why couldn't it be the other way around? why couldn't he be the one on the receiving end of your love? bakugou knew for sure he wouldn't do half of the shitty things that your lover would do. he hated that you stayed with worthless dick-face of a man you call your boyfriend. did you not know that with your personality and beauty that you could find someone that was worth millions?
"you know... i like to think someone cares for me that way." bakugou didn't have to look at you to tell there were tears prickling your eyes. water threatening to spill out. it was a usual thing whenever you'd ask him to lend a ear to your venting sessions. he wanted nothing more than to grab your face and kiss your tears away.
bakugou didn't understand love. not in the slightest. but bakugou understood regret. and his biggest regret came in the form of you. if only bakugou had enough courage to tell he that he loved you years ago when you two first met, then he would be the person on the receiving end. he would be the guy who would always be by your side. to be the guy who truly cares about you.
for however long you stayed with that asshole of a boyfriend, bakugou was aware his chance with you was as close to zero.
and he was fine with that.
because even though it pained him to hear you talk about another guy, bakugou would rather have some of you than none of you. he didn’t mind having to swallow his feelings that tugged at his heart if it meant you were happy.
he dryly laughed. "there is," his eyes suddenly finding comfort in the wet cement below them. "just someone who fuckin' sucks at showing it."
bakugou didn’t just not understand love. he hated it. he despised love because it always fell into the hands of the wrong person.
-
yes the quote is from fruits basket, i couldnt help it.
#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x reader#bakugou smut#bnha#bnha bakugo katsuki#bnha bakugo x reader#bnha bakugou#bnha x reader#my hero academia bakugou#mha bakugou#katsuki bakugo x reader#baku#bakugou x y/n#bakugo katuski#katsuki bakugo mha#bakugou x you#bakugou fluff#bakugou katuski x reader#mha bakugo katsuki#mha x reader#mha#mha bakugo x reader#mha bakugō#mha bakugo smut#bnha smut#bnha bakugō#bnha fanfiction#fanfiction#mha fanfiction#mha angst
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THERE’S ONLY ONE..COUCH ★ CS55
pairing: carlos sainz jr x fem!reader (she/her)
summary: You and Carlos have to sleep at Lando’s place after a party, but the guest room has no furniture, you have to sleep in the living room. So, there’s no ‘only one bed’… there’s only one couch.
warning: teasing, carlos speaking spanish.
word count: 1.5k (it's 1.555 and i love that)
note: this is my first “one shot” ever, i am SCARED. also asking for part two is allowed in this one lmao, tell me if you would like that :)
Three days ago, Lando Norris had won his first race in Formula 1 and because celebrations were never-ending to him, he had to do something with his closest friends two days after the big obnoxious party. That’s how you and Carlos ended up in Lando’s apartment in Monaco.
Now, the thing is, Lando was the one who bought the plane tickets, then sent them to you that morning, he was in a rush since you were his only guests who didn’t reside in Monaco. And you were also in a rush, so no return tickets or hotel. And even if you could afford a night in Monaco, you were still drunk-out-off-your-mind at this point.
So.
"Hey Lando, do you think that um... I stay the night? If it isn’t a bother, obviously.” You said, words collide with each other.
“Oh, of course, mate! I already told Carlos you guys could crash here.” Lando says with a new bottle of wine, you laugh at his drunk mannerisms. "But, the guest room has no furniture yet, so you have the couch or the floor.” the brunette explains.
"The couch is fine," Carlos answers behind you.
Lando raised an eyebrow "For you two?"
You understood the doubt, he was asking if you would be comfortable. The brit didn’t have that teasing tone when he sees couples interact. On that note, you exchanged glances with Carlos and he shrugged before nodding.
"Yes," you both said at the same time.
Charles choked on some wine, laughing. The Monegasque had been talking with Lando when you approached him. “Sorry, mate, I just like that they get along so well.” He clarifies and winks at you.
You rolled your eyes, Charles has been like this for months, insisting you should date Carlos, saying you both are far into each other. You tell him he is just your friend, you’re his engineer, but Charles Leclerc can be very stubborn.
“Yes, well, I think I'm going to the balcony for air, I'll see you later.” You babble and Charles lets out a big laugh. “Thank you again, Lan”
“I'm going with you.” Carlos says.
“What?”
"I'm going to take some air with you," Carlos explains to you and you nod, exiting the scene side by side, leaving behind Charles’ victorious smile and new gossip for Lando.
"I'm going to sleep on the floor," Carlos says as you approach the balcony.
“No, you won’t. You have media duty to attend this week, Carlitos, please.”
“I'll be fine, mujer!” he smiles, surrounding your shoulders with his arm “I've been doing it for a while now.”
“And that’s exactly why you shouldn't” you exclaim “If it bothers you, I'll take the floor.”
Carlos looks at you as if you just committed a crime and shakes his head. You laugh, snuggling a little into the Spaniard's arm, feeling warm and safe around him. Yeah, Carlos made you feel safe.
“Carlos, as part of the Ferrari team, I don't want you sleeping on the floor.” You complain, again.
You have been having this discussion for about three minutes. It was simple, Sainz said that he was used to it and you attacked, saying that there was room for both of you on the couch.
“Cariño, there is no room for both of us on the couch.” He repeats for the thousand time “Just lay down and sleep, I'm fine.”
"Sainz, stop it. There is enough room here, so you come to sleep here, where there is enough space, or I will make sure you can’t seat, rest or sleep in beds and couches for the rest of the season"
At that moment, Carlos turned to look at you with wide eyes, it was a funny statement, but he loved when you went all fearless for him.
Getting lost in his thoughts, Carlos gave you enough time to believe you had won the battle; so when he looked at you again, you already had a satisfied smile on your face, and he knew he had no way out.
Carlos sighed. "Okay, you win, just promise that you won't do that, please”
You looked at him tenderly and smiled. It was a peculiar smile, it was full of yearning and confessions. It wasn’t a smile you gave a lot, at least not to people who weren’t Carlos Sainz Jr. Oh, but Carlos was too blinded in his own fascination to notice.
“It’s okay, for now, I'll leave your furniture alone.”
After that, you shared a couple of laughs with the Spaniard before sitting on the sofa, moving the cushions aside, and putting down the pillows Lando gave you.
You lay down, turning to Carlos —whose eyes haven’t left you— making a small signal for him to lay down next to you.
The Spaniard approached quietly, laying down. And, it turns out, the couch wasn't as big as it looked, a quarter of Carlos's body was outside it, and it was somewhat uncomfortable.
"Hey, do you think you can move a little?" Carlos asked in a soft tone, to which you automatically agreed.
You both started to move and complain, because when you moved, he did, making you uncomfortable. You moved again. It was still messy.
This is how a few minutes passed between complaints and movement, at least before you fell directly on top of Carlos, after that, everything was silence, surprise, and closeness. Bodies so close you felt the other’s skin burn through your clothes.
You wanted to burn.
“I told you there wasn't enough space.” Carlos whispered, mockingly.
“Are you uncomfy?” You asked with annoyance, he shakes his head. "Then you're fine, I'm not uncomfy either."
For a moment, silence rules the room. Quiet enough to hear Carlos’ heart beating against his chest, you breathe deeply, so deeply that he feels it.
"You’re heart is racing, honey," you whisper, pet name slipping right through. You normally use it to joke around, and you think you are, but at some point it feels like you’re supposed to say it.
His eyes dart over your face, looking for something he knows he will find. “So it’s yours.”
You see it then. Gaze drowned in desire, pupils dilated just like yours. There’s also fear—fear of making the wrong move, of dooming something that has barely started.
You bring your fingers to Carlos’ face, caressing his jaw in the most delicate way you know.
“I want... Mi vida, can I kiss-” You don’t let him finish his question, your lips are on his.
Carlos holds you by the neck, bringing you closer. His face tilts slightly, kissing deeper. His tongue asks for permission to play with yours as butterflies find home in your stomach. You can feel Carlos melting from the taste of you, loving the feeling, the intimacy of the moment.
This felt so right yet so wrong. It was strange. One of his engineers and him. If any of the team knew, this could end bad, would bring a thousand problems, attention none of you wanted for each other. But they didn't know.
Carlos felt too good for it to be a bad thing.
He wants to kiss you for as long as you let him. He wants to pour his heart into every single one.
He wants it to last forever and that’s why splitting is the worst part of it. That moment when your body asks you for more, but needs to breathe. When it asks to be pleased, but can’t stop begging for mercy. You want his lips to be mercy. But you find air.
Carlos looks at you in fascination, his hands instinctively falling on your hips. Something stops him.
“Can I touch you?” He asks and you nod.
The Spaniard’s eyes sparkle, surrendering to intimacy. His fingers begin to slide down your curves, slow and fearful, trying to do everything not to disturb you. You who can’t be more eager.
“Your curves are… beautiful” He whispers, looking for the words he wanted, “So perfect.”
“Carlos,”
“Si, mi vida?” He whispers into your ear, biting the lobe gently. This small contact causes your back to arch slightly. Carlos speaks again “So, so, beautiful.”
“Carlos, please,” you beg, it was unnecessary to ask if you wanted to stop or continue.
"Oh, what I would do to you if we weren't at Lando’s place." That little innuendo seems to leave Carlos’ lips by accident, realization making his face burn.
You just smile. Wanting more, wanting his words to be spoken with promise.
“Want to know something, Sainz? We have a two-week break after this race, and I have no plans.” That makes Carlos smile, closing the gap between you once again. You wonder if it would actually happen, if it’s not you making empty promises.
“Then I’ll have to get you to Spain.” Carlos whispers, kissing your neck, finding comfort in it. “Good night, mi vida.”
“Good night, my love.”
translations:
linda pretty cariño sweetheart mi vida my life
# “ ࣭⸰ ★ my writings !#carlos sainz#carlos sainz jr#carlos sainz f1#carlos sainz 55#carlos sainz one shot#carlos sainz imagine#carlos sainz blurb#carlos sainz drabble#carlos sainz smut#carlos sainz x reader#carlos sainz x y/n#carlos sainz x you#formula 1#f1 fic#f1 imagine#formula one#f1#f1 ferrari#mentioned#lando norris#charles leclerc
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Finding Home || Part Eight
Azriel x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 4.1k
Warnings: smut. fingering. blowjob. masterbation.
Summary: Y/N goes out on her date and leaves Azriel alone. When she returns, she admits something to him she wouldn’t have when she was sober.
Finding Home Masterlist
A Court of Thorns and Roses Masterlist
•••
When Y/N left that morning, the smile fell from Azriel’s face. It was the day of her date and all he wanted to do was get on his hands and knees and beg her to go with him instead. To distract himself, Azriel cleaned around Y/N’s apartment.
He cleaned and tidied even if he didn’t need to. Anything to get his mind off of Y/N’s date that night. He had checked in with Feyre when he woke that morning about how the painting was going. Apparently painting takes time and Azriel shouldn't rush her. He huffed out a laugh and continued to fold the blanket he had in his hands.
The more Azriel cleaned dishes, washed down Y/N’s countertops and sorted everything out, he began to feel a slight pain in his chest. This should be the life he should have had years ago. Azriel never considered himself a domestic person, preferring the life of training and working. But the moment his family all found their mates and true love and began to talk to him about what happened the previous night. When Cassian complained about the chores he had to do when the House of Wind sided with Nesta in an argument (which was all the time). When Rhys and Feyre would come into a meeting tired and talked about staying up all night because Nyx wouldn’t settle. When Mor announced that she and Emerie were moving in together.
Azriel had no escape from the happiness around him. He hadn’t had to bring someone to his dungeon in Hewn City in nearly ten months. The missions he was sent on didn’t take up nearly the same amount of time they normally did but sometimes Azriel would find ways to stretch them out.
After constantly craving work and training, Azriel couldn’t believe that he was now sorting out Y/N’s cutlery and finding himself enjoying it. Maybe he was finally maturing at his big age. Maybe it made him feel useful. Azriel knew the real answer but didn’t want to admit it to himself.
He continued to dote around the apartment.
***
When Y/N returned that evening, she was shocked to see Azriel making dinner. He wore her apron and bit his lip in concentration.
“What are you making?” Y/N asked, knocking Azriel out of his concentration.
“Dinner,” Azriel said. “I don’t know exactly what but I remember you mentioning it once.”
“It smells amazing,” Y/N said, walking over to join him at his side.
“I am not just a pretty face,” Azriel teased.
Y/N rolled her eyes. “Who told you that?”
“I know you’ve been thinking it,” Azriel retorted.
Y/N held his gaze for a moment before clearing her throat and looked away. “I need to get ready for my date. Try not to burn the building down.”
As Y/N left the kitchen, Azriel watched her walk away, feeling a tightening in his chest. He ignored it and went back to preparing his dinner.
***
Azriel served up his dinner onto a plate, feeling extremely excited to eat it. Just as he pulled out the chair to sit—
“Az,” Y/N called from her bedroom. “I need help!”
Azriel got to his feet instantly and walked the short distance to her bedroom. He lightly pushed open the door. “Yes?”
“I need you to help me lace the rest of my dress up,” Y/N said, opening the door for him. “I managed to get the bottom part done but I can’t reach any further.”
The moment she was revealed to him, Azriel’s mouth opened in shock. Standing before him was the most beautiful female he had ever seen. Her dress was a deep crimson and flowed around her legs effortlessly. With every movement the dress moved around her like dancing flames.
“Eyes up here, soldier,” Y/N teased.
“I—I…” Azriel said, unable to get any words out.
“I guess I look okay?” Y/N said.
Azriel could only nod as he stepped further into the room as if enchanted by her.
A laugh slipped past Y/N’s lips as she turned her back to Azriel. He simply stepped up and placed his hands on the two ribbons on the back of her dress.
As he began to lace up the dress, he couldn’t help but inhale the scent of Y/N’s perfume. It was intoxicating to him. He began to pull the ribbons tighter, winching in the dress for her. His fingertips brushed her bare back and Azriel savoured the touch.
Once he was done, Flavi turned around with a wide smile. “Thank you,” she said brightly and Azriel thought she couldn’t be more stunning.
“You’re welcome,” Azriel muttered, his voice low and wanting.
“I need your genuine opinion though,” Y/N said, stepping back, her fingers fiddling with her necklace, which Azriel was sure was more pink than it was a second ago. “Do I wear these earrings or other ones? I don’t think these go with the dress.”
The earrings did go with the dress but Azriel pretended to look to have an excuse to admire her for a moment longer.
Azriel suddenly gasped. “Wait here!”
He rushed from Y/N’s bedroom and to his bag in the corner of the living room. He had hidden the small box containing the earrings there after they had returned from the market. He quickly took them and returned to Y/N’s bedroom.
“I know that you will most likely be mad at me,” Azriel began, “but just know that I haggled for them.”
He revealed the box to Y/N and she took it with unsure hands. “This isn’t a trick is it? It’s not going to turn into a large monster and eat me alive.”
Azriel laughed. “Just open it.”
A gasp left Y/N the moment she opened the box. “Azriel you didn’t…”
“I did,” Azriel said sheepishly.
“But I told you not to spend so much money on me,” Y/N said.
“And I didn’t listen,” Azriel replied. He wouldn’t admit to Y/N that he paid even more than the price he offered Y/N.
“But—“ Y/N said, not being able to find the words.
Instead she threw her arms around his shoulders and hugged him tightly. Azriel stiffened for a moment and Y/N began to pull away.
“Sorry,” Y/N said.
Azriel wrapped his arms around her waist and hugged her back tightly, burying his head into the crook of her neck. “Don’t apologise.”
“Thank you so much, Azriel,” Y/N muttered.
“You don’t need to thank me,” Azriel replied.
The hug lingered for a brief moment more before Y/N pulled away first and turned to her mirror to put the earrings on. “There. Perfect.”
Y/N turned around. “How do I look?”
“Beautiful,”
Y/N smiled. “I should get going. The restaurant is about a twenty minute walk. I don’t want to be late.”
Azriel nodded. “Have fun.”
“I will,” Y/N said. “Don’t burn down my apartment.”
Azriel huffed out a laugh. “I’ll try not to.”
With a parting smile, Y/N picked up her small bag and left the room. He heard the front door open and close. Azriel was left alone once more.
He calmed his racing heartbeat and left Y/N’s bedroom and returned to his dinner. It didn’t look so appetising anymore, reminding him too much of the meals he ate on his own when his family was busy.
Azriel reached for the bottle of alcohol and poured it into a glass. He finished it one go. He poured another one immediately. Azriel began to eat his dinner in complete silence.
***
The alcohol had gone to Azriel’s brain. He wasn’t drunk but he was sure that if he finished off the bottle, he would be. Reluctantly Azriel placed the bottle down and slumped against the couch. His dinner was long gone and he was left with nothing to do.
Y/N had been gone for nearly two hours and Azriel’s shadows became restless as if they were looking for her. He didn’t try to stop them.
Y/N wasn’t due back for another couple of hours so the moment she stepped into her apartment, Azriel was shocked.
“You’re early,” Azriel commented.
Y/N laughed humorously. “I would have been earlier if I didn’t stick around the restaurant and had dinner on my own since he never showed up.”
Azriel’s head snapped to face her. “He didn’t show up.”
Y/N kicked off her shoes, stumbling slightly. “No. I stood outside of that restaurant for forty five minutes before I went in to see about the reservation. He didn’t even make it like he told me he would.”
“I’m sorry,” Azriel said sincerely. “I knew you were excited.”
Y/N slumped down on the couch next to him. “Everyone in that restaurant looked at me in pity as I say on my own. It was embarrassing. The restaurant gave me a free bottle of wine too.”
Azriel’s shadows swarmed around Y/N’ lightly caressing her skin. A small smile was brought to her lips.
“I’m sure he wasn’t worth your time,” Azriel said.
“He probably wasn’t,” Y/N said. “But I was hoping to…no it’s embarrassing to admit.”
“What?” Azriel asked.
“No, I can’t,” Y/N said.
“It’s unlike you to get embarrassed around me,” Azriel said.
Y/N rolled her eyes. “No. But this is just embarrassing to admit to anyone.”
“You can tell me,” Azriel said.
Y/N sighed. “I am probably only telling you this because I’ve had a whole bottle of wine to myself.”
Azriel chuckled quietly.
“I didn’t go on this date to find the love of my life,” Y/N said. “I only went because I’ve just been so…pent up recently. And I cannot give myself the satisfaction I need.”
“Oh,” Azriel said.
“See, it’s an embarrassing thing to admit,” Y/N muttered.
“It’s not embarrassing,” Azriel replied. “It’s normal.”
“It’s not embarrassing that I cannot satisfy myself so I turn to the first male in years to ask me on a date to reach that satisfaction,” Y/N said before groaning. “I just feel on edge right now.”
Y/N turned and looked at Az. He could feel the heat in her eyes and the pent up frustration. The burning desire in her eyes.
He wasn’t sure what overcame him.
“I could help with that,” Azriel offered.
“What?” Y/N said.
Azriel shrugged. “I will admit that I have been pent up for a while too. And since we both have been quite…pent up for a while. We could help one another. We trust one another.”
“Is this a serious offer, Az,” Y/N said. “Because if you are just telling a really shitty joke—“
“It’s not a joke,” Azriel replied, his hand inching towards hers.
“So you are being serious?” Y/N asked.
“Yes,” Azriel replied, his voice quiet and breathless.
“I…” Y/N said, her eyes roaming around Azriel’s face.
She didn’t say anything else as she surged forward and pressed her lips against Azriel’s. He could taste the drink on her tongue. Sweet compared to the bitter drink he had consumed. It only made him kiss her harder. His hands tangled in her hair, gripping tight. Y/N groaned into his mouth.
“Fuck, Az,” Y/N gasped, manovering to straddle his hips, her dress bunching around her waist.
Azriel kissed her again and pressed his body against hers, feeling every inch of her. His hands cupped her ass and squeezed tightly. He couldn’t keep his hands off of her body. He craved to touch her.
With haste, Y/N began to unbutton the shirt Azriel wore to expose his warm skin.
“Eager,” Azriel commented, his pupils blown wide with lust.
“Never too eager, my love,” Y/N said breathlessly, ripping the shirt from his body and throwing it to the floor.
The moment Azriel felt Y/N’s hands on his chest, he let out a deep growl. His hands gripped her thighs and felt under the dress until he squeezed her bare hips.
“No underwear?” Azriel asked.
“I was expecting to get lucky tonight,” Y/N said.
“You are,” Azriel said and crashed his lips against hers once more. Teeth clashed, tongues explored each other's mouths and Azriel couldn’t help but think of how right it felt.
The sleeve of Y/N’s dress fell down her shoulder and exposed the top of her breast. The hunger within Azriel only grew. He unlaced Y/N’s dress easily and it grew loose around her upper body. Y/N’s hands instantly pressed against her chest to preserve her modesty.
Azriel’s eyes softened. “It’s just me.”
Y/N nodded before she kissed him and allowed her dress to fall away.
Azriel couldn’t take his eyes away from Y/N’s bare form as he touched what he could, pulling sweet noises from her lips.
“You’re perfect,” Azriel muttered against her skin.
“Look who’s talking,” Y/N said, tracing the tattoos on his chest.
Azriel kissed her again and began to move his hands closer to the inner part of her thighs and higher. Y/N let out a whine. Azriel could already feel the heat coming from her. The wetness gathered between her legs. Azriel could smell it and he needed her now.
“Are you still sure, Y/N?” Azriel asked.
“Yes,” Y/N gasped for air. “Please, Azriel, just touch me.”
This time Azriel pulled her in for a sweet kiss and slowly moved his fingers to gather the wetness between her thighs, feeling along the folds of her pussy and slowly sank in two fingers. Azriel’s eyes rolled to the back of his head the moment he felt her squeeze around him. The warmth, the tightness. It was all he ever imagined.
“Oh, fuck,” Y/N whined.
“Y/N…” Azriel gasped, his hips jerking, wanting friction on his cock desperately.
“Fuck me, Az,” Y/N continued to whine as gasp and Azriel set a slow pace, his thumb hovering over her clit.
Y/N’s hips twitched, seemingly seeking more.
Azriel pressed open mouthed kisses on her chest anc up her neck and sped up his pace. The grip Y/N had on his shoulders tightened and her nails dug in. Azriel craved more.
“More. Give me more, Azriel,” Y/N cried. “Fucking hells, give me more.”
Azriel complied and slipped another finger alongside his other two. Y/N panted against his mouth.
“Ride my fingers,” Azriel said, his voice low and unrestrained.
Y/N moved her hips faster and harder, chasing after the orgasm.
“Good girl,” Azriel panted, rolling her nipple between his fingers causing Y/N to arch her back.
“Feels good,” Y/N whined, trying to get more friction on her clit. Azriel’s thumb barely touched it making Y/N more frustrated by the minute.
“Imagine how it would feel with my cock instead,” Azriel whispered, letting the words roll off his tongue without thinking. “Imagine how it would fill you up, stretch this tight pussy for me.”
“Azriel,” Y/N whimpered. “Please I need more.”
At her sounds of pleasure, Azriel’s cock strained in his trousers. He was sure that he could finish just from the sounds emitting from Y/N.
Azriel pressed his thumb harder against her clit and Y/N cried out, pulling at his hair. Azriel groaned at the feeling.
“Yes, Az, right there,” Y/N panted. “Harder, please…”
Azriel circled her clit as he kissed down her neck, finding each and every sweet spot to pull more of the delicious noises from her mouth.
“I’m close, Az,” Y/N said, pulling his head from her neck to meet her lips. “I need to come. Please…”
Y/N’s breath caressed his lips and she rested her forehead against his as she began to move her hips faster on his fingers, chasing that orgasm she had been desperately craving.
“Come for me, Y/N,” Azriel said, his lips brushing against hers. “I need to feel you coming on my fingers.”
“Oh, Az,” Y/N gasped as she threw her head back and Azfriel could then feel as she came hard over him. Her pussy squeezed his fingers and Azriel could only imagine what it would feel like around his cock which was harder than it had ever been.
“Fuck…” Y/N whined before she crashed her lips against Azriel’s, riding out her high.
As her hips stilled, Y/N pulled away from Azriel’s lips, breathing hard. Azriel was sure he was breathing the same.
He slowly removed his fingers from her and Y/N gasped, her grip tightening on his shoulders. Azriel wished he could see the sight before him tattoos onto his brain.
Azriel wasn’t sure what took over his body as he slowly licked his fingers clean. The moment he had a taste, Azriel craved more. He imagined what it would be like to sink to his knees and bury his face between her thighs. He could only dream of the taste.
“Azriel…” Y/N whined.
Azriel removed his fingers from his mouth and leaned forward, his hands gently squeezing her hips.
“Y/N…” Azriel whispers, resting his forehead against hers. He closed his eyes, revelling in her closeness for a moment longer. He knew that this moment between them would be broken soon enough and all Azriel wanted was to remember the feeling. Remember how Y/N made him feel.
The moment was broken too soon as Y/N pulled away from him. Azriel's hands reached out for her as she got further from him. He missed the warmth she brought.
Y/N shuffled so she kneeled on the floor. She gently touched Azriel’s knees and parted them to allow her to sit between them, never breaking eye contact.
“What are you doing?” Azriel asked.
“Returning the favour,” Y/N replied.
Before Azriel could process anything, Y/N unlaced his trousers and the moment her hand brushed over his clothes cock, his hips jerked, seeking more contact.
She pulled him out of his trousers and Azriel gasped as her warm hands wrapped around him. He gripped the pillow next to him, knuckles turning white.
“Y/N…” Azriel gasped. “Fuck….”
“I didn’t know how much my touch would affect you,” Y/N said, her breath brushing over his cock as she massaged the head.
Azriel didn’t want her to know how much her touch affected him but right now, all of his restraints flew out of the window. Shameless gasps and whines left Azriel as he lightly thrust his hips up, seeking more touch.
The moment Azriel felt the warm heat of Y/N’s mouth made Azriel whine and grip tightly onto her hair, pulling her further onto his cock.
All restraint left Azriel’s body as he succumbed to his pleasure. It had been a while since someone else had brought him such enjoyment. For the past few years it had just been him and his hand. He had never had the desire to seek pleasure elsewhere. He always had a false hope that the next person he let into his bed would be the one he was destined to be with. Azriel could never get over the disappointment when they left the very next morning with no note, vanishing from Azriel’s life.
Azriel came without warning, shooting his load down Y/N’s throat. She made a small noise of surprise and Azriel expected her to pull away and spit. But Y/N did the complete opposite. She pulled her mouth so she sucked on just the tip as Azriel continued to come.
Once she pulled away from his cock, Y/N swallowed and Azriel let out a deep moan and surged forward and kissed her. He didn’t care that he could taste himself. He needed the feeling of her lips on his to ground himself otherwise he was sure he wouldn’t be able to claw his way out of the haze of desire falling over him.
Y/N kissed back eagerly and situated herself on top of his lap, draping her arms across his shoulders. His hands gently caressed her hips. She pulled away first and Azriel only wanted to pull her back and never let her go.
The two sat in silence for a moment and it was in that moment where Azriel realised what they had just done. It was at that moment where Azriel realised that Y/N wasn’t just a friend to him. No, they had just passed the barrier of friendship.
Y/N slowly removed her arms from where they were positioned around his neck. She seemed slightly unsure of herself as she stood to her feet.
“Thank you, Azriel,” Y/N said, her voice strangely distant.
“Anytime,” Azriel said, and Y/N had no clue about how much he meant it.
Y/N collected her dress from the floor and covered herself up with it. Azriel hated how shy she suddenly became. As she turned back to Azriel, he had hope in his heart as she leaned down to kiss his cheek, letting it linger.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” she said before turning around and walking down the hall to her bedroom without another word.
Azriel covered his face with his hand and sighed. He couldn’t believe what had just happened. The scene replayed in his mind and he couldn’t think of anything else. The scent of her perfume lingered in the air. His cock took an interest once more.
Azriel sighed, trying to refrain himself but the moment he remembered Y/N’s blissed out look as her eyes rolled back as she came, the eye contact as she had her lips wrapped around him, she sigh of delight she let out as she swallowed everything he had to offer, Azriel’s hand was steadily pumping himself. He tried to keep his small sounds of pleasure quiet. He placed his other hand over his mouth and he pumped faster conjuring up scenarios in his mind all containing Y/N.
He needed to feel her wrapped around him, the tight heat consuming his very being. He needed it desperately. He needed it more than he needed anything else in his over five hundred years of existence.
It took an embarrassingly short amount of time for Azriel to come once more, spilling over his hand. Azriel panted quietly as his head rested on the back of the couch. Now that he had just a small taste of Y/N, he was sure he would never want another female again. He only ever wanted to hear her sounds of pleasure. He only ever wanted to feel her touch, her kiss.
Her love.
Azriel only wanted to wake up with her in the mornings. He only wanted to hold her close as they both read the same book. He only ever wanted to walk hand in hand with her through Velaris, proudly showing her off to everyone who would look his way. He wanted to take care of her when she was sick. He wanted to sing her to sleep when she awoke from a nightmare. He wanted to listen to her play her violin and allow his shadows to dance around her, caressing her body and soul. He wanted to show his love to her with every action he did.
Azriel only wanted Y/N’s love.
***
Y/N softly closed her bedroom door behind her. She threw the dress to the ground and walked to her bed. She could already feel the wetness between her thighs. It had started happening the moment Azriel caressed her hip with the gentlest touch as she sat down.
Y/N sighed and flopped down on her bed. She vowed that this would only be something to satisfy her needs. But those needs still needed to be met. Slowly, her hand trailed down her body and in between her legs.
As she touched herself she only thought about Azriel’s touch on her body, how he made her feel. The gentle yet assertive feel of his touch. She craved more…and that was dangerous.
Y/N gasped as she came, her hand flying to her mouth to stifle the noise. She rose out her high before relaxing fully into the bed.
Her chest moved up and down in heavy breaths. She was sure she had never felt this good in her life. She could still feel the phantom touch of Azriel’s hands on her skin. Goosebumps covered her body.
Deep down, Y/N knew that the only reason why what happened between them even happened was because they were both intoxicated. She could taste the bitter taste of the alcohol Azriel had consumed on his lips. Neither of them were thinking with their full brain.
Y/N sighed.
In the morning, she would pretend that it didn’t happen.
No matter how much she wished it would happen again.
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#azriel acotar#azriel smut#azriel fluff#azriel fic#azriel fanfic#azriel x reader#azriel shadowsinger#azriel#acotar#acotar x reader#a court of thorns and roses
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At Least Twice a Day (Rooster x Reader)
Part of The What If Collection of blurbs for Roo and Baby Girl. My masterlist. Banner by @mak-32
Warnings: language, mentions of smut, mention of injury
You loved having Goose and Carole stay with you and Bradley. His mom always taught you a new recipe, and you could tell how happy it made Bradley to spend time with them. Especially Goose.
The guys were out walking Tramp after dinner, and you were helping Carole make a cake in your kitchen as you kept pausing to look at your engagement ring which used to be hers.
"He'll take good care of you," Carole mused out loud as she cracked some eggs. "Not that you can't take care of yourself, of course. But he'll give you anything you need or want. That's just the way he loves you."
Her words made you feel gooey. "That's the way I love him, too."
Your future mother-in-law's beaming smile left you wishing Bradley would return from his walk so you could touch him. You just always wanted to be touching him. "Chocolate frosting?" Carole asked, interrupting your thoughts.
"Yes. As long as Goose likes that."
She laughed and tossed her head back. "Goose has never meet a food he won't eat."
"Sounds exactly like Bradley."
Once the pretty cake was cooling and the frosting was ready to go on it, the front door opened, and Tramp bounded in ahead of the guys. "It smells good in here," Bradley murmured as he made a beeline to give you a hug. He kissed the top of your head as you snuggled your cheek against him. "Well this is a warm welcome."
"I missed you a little bit," you whispered. You made sure Carole and Goose looked distracted as you said, "You told me you'd make some more time for me all week. I want it real bad." You sent him a little pout just to reinforce things. It was hard to be as intimate as you liked when his parents were visiting.
His response sounded a little stern. "I know. I've been tired. And a little preoccupied. Don't act like you aren't getting it, Baby Girl." You pressed your lips together, because he'd actually taken the time to go down on you this morning before he got dressed. For almost thirty minutes. And it had been really good. "Now what smells so delicious?"
You patted his belly; he was still trying to get in shape again after his horrific accident during his last deployment a few months ago. "I don't think you should eat too much cake, okay. You told me to make sure you were making healthy food choices."
Bradley sighed and said, "If you make it, I'm going to want to eat it." He sounded a little snippy, and you knew it was because he loved his mom's recipes, but you'd stand firm.
"Just one small piece. I'm going to ice the cake, and we can all eat it tomorrow before your parents fly home to Virginia."
"Fine."
------------------------------
Bradley knew you were probably a tiny bit annoyed with him when you excused yourself early to take a shower and get ready for bed. But the cake looked so good, and he wanted to eat it even though he did tell you not to let him have too many sweets. His parents were on the couch watching a movie together when he changed into his gym clothes as he heard you get into the shower. Since he had his weight bench in the garage now, he should be using it every day.
When he walked into the living room on his way to the kitchen to make a protein shake, he felt two pairs of eyes on him. "What?" he asked, turning toward the couch. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Well..." Carole began, already cluing Bradley in to the fact that this would be an irritating conversation. "We couldn't help but notice that you got a little bit snippy with your fiancée earlier."
"Oh here we go," he muttered in response, running his hand through his hair. "How much did you hear?"
They shared a look before Carole asked, "Are you sure you're pleasing her in the bedroom?"
He froze in place and barked out an annoyed laugh. "We are not having this conversation. Absolutely not."
His dad put a hand on his mom's shoulder, but that didn't stop her. "Oh, yes, we are. We have always been very open about sex, Bradley. It's nothing to be ashamed of!"
Bradley looked at her bright blue eyes before glancing at his dad. It wasn't that he was embarrassed to talk about sex with his parents even though he was well into his thirties, it was more that he wasn't sure how to defend himself right now. "This conversation is not necessary. She was being dramatic."
Carole scoffed in response. "It's not dramatic when you're letting your partner know you need something, Bradley. She's going to be your wife!"
"Yeah," Bradley barked. "And she's already getting it at least twice a day most days!"
Goose choked on his sip of tea.
"Oh," Carole said softly, but she looked a lot calmer now as Bradley shook his head. "Well, that's good."
"Mmhmm," he hummed sarcastically with his hands planted on his hips. "I am fucking my fiancée regularly. She's plenty satisfied. She just likes being a brat. But thank you for your concern." He turned toward the kitchen, nearly forgetting what he was planning on doing in the first place. "Jesus," he grumbled as he grabbed his protein powder. "The fucking audacity."
------------------------
When you woke up the next morning, Bradley was still sound asleep, so you made your way to the kitchen to start breakfast for the four of you. The coffee was brewing, and you were collecting ingredients for some pancake batter when you froze. Half of the cake was gone. "What the fuck?" you gasped, and that's when you saw Bradley walk in. "You ate the cake."
He frowned at you. "No, I didn't."
"You did!" you accused. "It's half eaten! You ate it out of spite!"
Bradley raised one eyebrow and asked, "Are you serious right now?"
You spun when you heard Goose clear his throat, and you turned to see that Carole couldn't even look you in the eye for some reason. "Good morning," she said as she reached for a mug. "Goose has something he needs to tell you."
"I ate the cake," he said. "It was delicious. I had one piece, and then I couldn't stop eating it. And then the next thing I knew, half of it was gone."
"Oh," you replied softly. "Well, that's okay. Why don't we just finish the cake for breakfast?"
"That sounds lovely," Carole replied, barely meeting your eyes.
You took a deep breath and turned toward Bradley. "I'm sorry, Roo. You can have a much cake as you want, I shouldn't have told you not to eat it."
He leaned in closer and whispered, "I'll have a little slice, Sweetheart. And I'm sorry I haven't been as attentive this week as I usually am. If you want me to fuck you nearly constantly, you know I will."
"Shhh," you hissed. "Your mom is already barely looking at me right now!"
Bradley laughed as his parents took the cake and coffee into the dining room. "That's because I told her you're a needy little thing who wants me balls deep inside her all the time."
"You did what?!"
#is it working for you?#roosterforme#b&bg#if you ask emily#bradley bradshaw x reader#bradley rooster bradshaw x reader#rooster imagine#rooster fanfiction#bradley bradshaw imagine
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Clandestine meetings were something Tommy was very familiar with back when he was in the closet. He just never thought he would be having one again–though this time it had nothing to do with a relationship he was trying to hide or sex.
Tommy spotted the person he was meeting the second he walked into the diner, a place out of the way that was known to truckers traveling in and out of LA. He gave the older woman at the counter a brief smile as he walked to the back corner booth. He slid across from the other occupant who slid a cup of coffee across the table. No words were exchanged as he put his normal two creams two sugars in–her gaze on him the whole time.
"What changed your mind?" She asked, not beating around the bush and he was glad for it. This wasn't exactly how Tommy wanted to spend his day off, but it was needed.
"It's become worse," Tommy told her, the anger seeping into his tone.
"I'm curious," She took a drink from her own coffee, "Two weeks ago you called me asking for my help to get Gerrard out of the 118, changed your mind three days later because Buck begged you not to do anything, and now you changed your mind again?"
He shook his head, leaning forward making her eyes narrow in interest, "I dont just want him out of the 118 anymore– I want him fired."
"What happened?"
"Evan happened."
Taylor moved her coffee aside and leaned in herself, arms crossed on the table as worry crossed her face, "Tommy?"
"I knew it was a possibility that Gerrard would risk one of their lives at some point– he has a history of leaving people to die, I should know–" Tommy began, Taylor sucked in a breath at his words, "But a foolish part of me hoped he learned his lesson in that at least."
"But he didn't."
Tommy shook his head, "They had a call at an apartment fire, and Evan was trapped. Gerrard wanted to leave him saying they wouldn't be able to get to him, luckily he wasn't the one in charge of the scene or–" He stopped and pushed back the emotion trying to rise to the surface, or he'd be dead was left unsaid, "I can't sit back and do nothing, if Evan is upset when he finds out then so be it, it's worth it to keep him and everyone I care about at the 118 safe."
"It's going to take a lot more to get him fired then just getting him removed."
"I know, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes. I know you still care about him Taylor, are you in?"
"Yes," She answered, no hesitation, "And I already have an idea of where we can start–"
It took two months to gather everything they needed to get him removed, a lot of it involving both of their connections, and people Tommy helped save who he kept in contact with and were willing to be their eyes when it was safe to at calls the 118 went out on. Video evidence against Gerrard grew, but they had one more plan to go through as a backup in case the videos of his behavior weren't enough. It wasn't something he was looking forward to and it would be the part to upset Evan, but Gerrard was dangerous and Tommy would protect Evan and the 118 even if it resulted in their first fight.
All they had to do was wait for the right moment.
When that time came, Tommy who was on the same scene as the 118, discreetly sent a text to Taylor. No one noticed Taylor Kelly standing with the crowd of on-lookers disguised and hiding her hair in a hat. Tommy clocked her and made sure most of his back was to the video she was recording, that way no one could see or hear what he was saying except Gerrard who stopped in front of him with a sneer. Tommy fixed himself and his body to look as if he was afraid to anyone watching the video, and he began speaking the practiced words. Gerrard’s face changed from disgust to anger.
Gasps came from every direction as the older man's fist came in contact with Tommy's face. Right there for three stations to witness along with multiple civilians.
"Tommy!" He heard Evan shout as the 118 rushed over, Eddie psychically putting himself between Gerrard and Tommy as Evan grabbed for Tommy to gently turn his head checking his soon-to-be bruised face. He was surprised the old man had such a right hook still. Hen stepped in, her eyes worried but Tommy gave her and Evan both a reassuring smile despite the slight jolt at the action.
"That was uncalled for Gerrard!–" Tommy heard Chimney start in on him, but couldn't see him as Evan and Hen were in front of him, and Eddie stood in protective mode making sure he didn't come at Tommy again.
Tommy felt a swirling of love for all of them in his chest and knew this was the right choice even more.
"I'm alright I promise," Tommy told them, his hand squeezing Evan's before pulling away reminding himself that they were still at work–and made a deal when they first started dating to keep it professional.
Tommy's captain and the other stations captain had come over and pulled Gerrard away, their faces furious.
He accepted the ice pack Hen handed him, and moved over to where the crowd was gathered.
"Tommy what–" Evan followed after him confused, the sound of the others boots trailed after.
"You get all that?" Tommy asked Taylor when he was close enough.
"What the hell is going o–" Evan cut off with a noise of surprise, eyes wide as Taylor grinned and took off her hat and glasses.
"Got it all," She waved her phone in the air briefly before smiling at the others with a nod.
"Uh–" Hen gestured at the two with her hands, "What is going on here?"
Tommy sighed and motioned for them to move more to the side, "Taylor and I have been working to get Gerrard fired."
"You were...working with Buck's ex?" Chimney looked back and forth between the three of them.
Tommy shrugged, "I did what had to be done."
"I feel like my head is going to explode," Evan mumbled to himself, rubbing his eyes as if he was seeing things, "You weren't meeting up with co-workers..you were planning with Taylor?"
He nodded, now reaching for Evan's hand and giving it a squeeze.
"Hold on–" Eddie chimed in, "So that punch–"
"Was supposed to happen."
"You purposely got yourself punched?!– I mean I'm glad it looks as if the guy is done for but are you kidding me Tommy?"
All of them backed away at Evan's tone.
"Uh- I love you?"
"Thomas Kinard–"
"Uh oh he brought out the full name," Chimney mumbled as they all backed away more.
Except all Evan did was cup Tommy's good side and pull him in for a kiss.
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hi, <3
I've been working for a week now, so I don't have time to send you ideas, but there are SO MANY in my head.😭😭😭 I do not know what to do!!!I think you've already guessed that I'm in love with Nanami's dad!! He's so cute as the father figure.Imagine that Kento and his wife had their first child (a girl) and when Kento comes home to his daughter and wife, he sees that his daughter is wearing a small bodysuit with the text “I love daddy” and Nanami just looks and is touched. DADNANAMIDADNANAMIDADNANAMI🤤🫦
Okay I cried my eyes out while writing this and the cover sent me over the edge 😭 But THANK YOU SO MUCH for that precious request my love, let me know what you think <3
Nanami's reaction to his daughter wearing a jumper saying "I love daddy"
Pairing: Nanami x wife!reader; Nanami x fem!daughter
Word Count: 1,3k
Synopsis: After the incidents of Shibuya and his wife getting severely injured, Nanami is relieved to know his new family safe and sound. A little suprise from his precious wife seems to be enough to make a grown man cry in joy though...
Warnings: cuteness overload, this had me balling in the best way, might be the comfort you need this is canon
This is like a spin-off to the "Haruta seeking revenge on Nanami's heavy pregnant wife" fic - just click on it to read it first!
To say the last few months were a trip to heaven and hell at the same time would be an understatement. Despite the horror the Shibuya incident caused, even though the attack of Haruta left both you and your precious baby to risk, you somehow made it all out alive. Kento, you and the little angel of daughter you gave birth to exactly one month after Shibuya.
“I’ll leave in five minutes, regardless of what you have to tell me afterwards”, he sends towards the man in front of him who is asking him for the hundredth time about the Shibuya incident.
Finally, this way too long day is over. A day without seeing you the whole time, a day without his little one by his side. Due to the fact that delivering your baby girl was rather difficult after the severe wound wasn’t healed yet, Shoko prescribed strict bed rest for you within the next few months. You are barely able to stand up on your own, let alone go to the toilet. Most of the time you lay on the couch with your daughter by your side, watching your favourite show on TV until you greet him with the brightest of smiles.
But even though every minor step causes you visible pain and it’s hard for you to be on your own, you insisted on him continuing doing his job. After all, somebody has to take care of poor Yuji when you’re not around. And since Gojo is gone, whole Jujutsu High seems to be an endless mess. Yes, somehow you did eventually convince him of leaving you every single morning. Even though he hates letting go of you after what happened not long ago.
“I will leave now”, he announces before grabbing his suitcase and walking away without waiting for an answer.
In the meantime, it’s hard for you to sit still.
“Come on angel, please hold still for a second. We just need leg number one, leg number two, and…There you go!”
Your eyes almost overflow with joy, just staring at the tiny jumper your daughter wears makes you feel emotional all over again. Kento worked so much these last weeks, making sure that especially Yuji feels better after all those things that happened to him during Shibuya. And the fact that you’ve got severely injured…You’ll never forget the look of horror on his face when you collapsed into his arms, Shoko making it just in time before everything went black. For the split of a second you thought everything is over, that this will be the last time you’ve seen your husband. Oh, how you begged Shoko to save the life of your unborn child instead of yours, how you held onto Kento’s hand for dear life.
But seeing that bundle of joy laying in front of you, giggling happily while kicking her tiny feet in her brand-new jumper…You have to read the words all over again, the simple writing that says “I love daddy”. You were mindlessly scrolling through baby stuff when it caught your attention, thinking about how your beloved husband would react to it. There was absolutely no way out of ordering it.
“Daddy will love to see you in this.”
Just the thought of how Kento will react makes you kick your feet too, smiling down at your giggling daughter. Even though every little movement sends a wave of pain through your entire body, you try to stay as positive as possible. The discomfort will go away eventually, but the joy Kento has gifted you with will stay forever.
You can sense him before he put the key into the lock right away, heart pounding so hard that it feels like jumping out of your body.
“This is out time angel”, you whisper into your daughter’s tiny ear before sitting up and staring at the door in sheer excitement.
Nanami’s heart skips a beat when seeing you, looking so adorable dressed in his way too big t-shirt and sweatpants.
“What are you smiling about, sweetheart?”
The second he lays his eyes on your flawless face decorated with that breath-taking smile, he is lost all over again. But by now it’s not only you who awaits him. No, next to you curled up on the couch lays the little bundle of joy that makes his happiness complete.
“I’m just so glad your back! How-ah…”
A minor groan escapes your lips as you try to sit up straight, Kento instantly rushing to your side.
“Hey, think about what Shoko said. No need to rush, we have the whole evening for ourselves, darling”, he gently speaks out, his hands caressing your back moderately.
He hasn’t seen it yet, the blanket on top of your daughter hiding the jumper very well from him. But you can’t contain your excitement any longer. For a moment, you’ll have to put your aching aside.
“Actually, there’s something I wanted to show you…”
Your husband tilts his head to the side, a tender smile creeping up his face before he can stop it. You look so utterly excited that he can’t help but wonder what you mean.
“I wonder what leaves you this excited.”
“Well, there aren’t many things apart from you that get me excited”, you reply with a sly grin.
“But maybe you should take a closer look at your daughter.”
Your heartbeat picks up even more as soon as he looks at your precious little angel, hand gently brushing over her tiny cheek. Slowly, he lifts her off the couch, blanket falling down and revealing her new jumper. You hold your breath, your husband’s eyes locked onto her body.
“I love daddy”, he reads out loud.
His smile widens, eyes turning glossy in pure admiration. Oh, how much he adores you, how much he loves you in every single way. Why does he suddenly turn this emotional? Why does the sheer sight of his daughter with a jumper saying “I love daddy” make him tear up? The last months were so rough on him, it was never granted that he’ll be able to hold his daughter like this while you sit next to him. For a few horrible seconds, he thought he lost you both.
But now you’re here. And you really think that he’s a good dad.
“Words can’t express how much that means to me…”, he mumbles, pressing his daughter against his chest and closing his eyes.
“Oh, I didn’t mean to make you cry love”, you instantly reply while getting up from the couch way too quickly.
Your husband catches you just in time before you fall back onto the couch, his free hand wrapped tightly around your waist while his daughter rests against his shoulder.
“You are the best thing that ever happened to me, (y/n). And to top it all off, you gifted me this beautiful daughter. You are so strong, I am so proud of everything you have done these last few months.”
His words his you in your feelings with full force. Despite the fact that you are a strong and composed woman, tears start to stream down your face like a waterfall while your gaze never leaves his. God, how much you love that man, how thankful you are for the fact that he survived. And for the bundle of joy that rests against his shoulder. You never thought your life would turn out like this, eventually. A snack of a husband holding you tightly in one hand while carrying your daughter with the other.
“I love you, Kento Nanami. That jumper says nothing but the truth”, you hush lightly.
Oh, Kento will definitely make sure of that.
“I love you too, sweetheart. And you, my little angel.”
Tags: @arehzhera @ploylulla @tzubaki @beatrexworld @kenstarsworld @dazaisdick @hellkaiserinphoenix @lauv4chuuya @shadowfoxey @starlightanyaaa @sindela @kayleegomez @sunshine7queen @magalimachete @mokoartpost @gatitam @idontknow1123 @creative1writings @sanicsmut @mynahx3 @sad-darksoul @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @chuyasthighs0 @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @wxwieeee @lovelyluna1 @froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso @gojosrealwife @coffeeluvr96 @mahi-tamashi @weebotaku21 @chaoticwinnercupcake @lees-chaotic-brain @risuola @sugurulefttesticle @wordskeeper @baku2345 @polarbvnny @ruixrei @bam-bam-bam-bame-blog @lavenderdrxp @localhehecat @alicerhr @kayleegomez
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Baby Gojo
Summary: Your friend brought you a baby. Is it possible that this child is your husband? Yes, because he was hit by a curse.
A/n: This is short. All I had to do was see Baby Gojo and I had to write it 🥹
Rolling out of bed, you reached the door as someone was waiting there. And with a hand on your stomach, you looked at the familiar blonde who was holding something in his hands.
"Good morning, sorry for the problem, (y/n)-san." he said, bowing slightly.
"Oh, good morning, Nanami. Will you come in?" you asked, opening the door slightly for him.
"No, thank you, I don't have time. I have to go back soon. I'm just here to give you this." He stepped closer to you, and gently raised his hands, holding the ball in the blanket so that you can take it gently. "I know you're pregnant and it might be hard for you... But you're the only one who can take care of it."
You felt a weight in your arms and looked at it.
You saw a small baby face with white hair.
Your eyes widened.
"This-."
The little child suddenly opened his eyes and you saw crystal blue.
"You're his wife, so–."
"Wait, this is Satoru's?" you asked, fury rising within you.
Does he have another child?!
Did he cheat on you?!
You felt tears prick your eyes just thinking about it. How could he cheat on you, his wife. You've been with him for so long and you're pregnant now!
You have his child under your heart and he does this to you?
And he sent Nanami to give you a baby while he was at work?! What about the mother of this child?!
And you're sure it's Satoru's! This baby looks exactly like him! Even though it's sweet, you felt heartache that it was your husband's child with another woman...
"Nanami, Is he really..." you started.
And as soon as he heard the tone of your voice, he hurried to explain.
"It is not like that! It's not his baby!" he said quickly.
Meanwhile, the white-haired baby held out his hands to you with a smile.
"This child is him."
"What?"
"...I have no idea how to explain this to you... He oversaw the mission of his disciples. Itadori gave it to me like this when they came back. Fushiguro said that he was showing off as usual and was hit by a curse that turned him into a baby for a while.. And according to Ieiri-san, this curse will last for about 9 hours on him. They returned to school about 5 hours ago. Therefore, the remaining 4 hours are for you."
"W-Wait! What should I do?! Is this really Satoru?!"
"I have no idea. This is Gojo Satoru himself." He started to come, but before leaving completely, he turned around. "Gojo-san would never cheated you."
You felt warmth spread through your chest at his words.
Do even people around you think so?
That's nice...
You looked down, feeling light tugs on your shirt.
You smiled slightly when you saw his smile. So sweet and tiny.
Holding him with one hand, you placed the finger of your other hand on his cheek, feeling the softness. He chuckled charmingly, grabbing the tip of your finger.
For that moment, you forgot about the weight of your belly and turned around as you entered the house. Closing the door with your foot to focus on the sweet little man in your arms.
"Who's so sweet, you are!" you said happily, unwrapping him from the blanket.
The bag you also got had all his stuff in it.
Probably his students had to see him naked... You have to experience this sight every day when his body is an adult. The fact that they saw a baby means nothing.
You pulled him out of the blanket to look at him. White fluffy hairs on his head, long white eyelashes and those beautiful blue eyes.
You have to take pictures of him while he looks like this! He's so sweet!
When the blanket fell off him, you saw that he was naked. There was nothing there that scared you. (Maybe because you've seen it in a different form.)
You placed him on the couch and went to get a new bunny diaper that you both already had. It was in your house because even if you were pregnant for a few more months, Satoru really wanted to go buy baby accessories.
And then, as you placed a soft diaper on his little body, you watched his smile. So innocent and cute.
Nothing will ever replace that childish smile. Especially when paired with those cheerful blue eyes.
You would love to see this image longer.
Even though he is your husband, you feel like you are just with your child.
The baby in front of you is the father of your child... How strange...
But this baby in front of you is the most adorable creature in the world! You love him!
You've never seen any photos from when Satoru was little! And now you were given the opportunity to see him as he was. And he was so sweet!
"Who's hungry, honey~?" You hummed as you picked him up. You kissed his little forehead to feel his little hands grab the shirt on your chest. "Oh god, no. I won't breastfeed my husband!"
You said to yourself as your thoughts started to go in the wrong direction. What kind of feeling is it? You'll have to wait a few months to find out. You cannot breastfeed your husband! He's just a baby for the next few hours! You have to give him normal milk or some fruit puree! Yogurt! He always ate it!
Running to the kitchen as fast as your load would allow you, you found a tub of yogurt (because Satoru likes it)
As you handed it to him, your mind paused for a moment.
Can't children eat something straight from the fridge?
But before you could take it from him, his greedy little mouth was eating the sweet strawberry yogurt.
His hands held it as he looked at you with wide eyes.
You love the look of it. You really love how your husband looks as a little kid. Besides, you think he has some awareness of it. There's a reason he knew what you were giving him to eat. And what other baby would grab your breasts? Well... It could have been a coincidence but still...
And also, he was happy to see you.
This makes your husband, even as a baby, self-aware.
Sitting on the couch with him, you thought about what it would look like later. He will remember this.
This is where I show you that your maternal instinct has already come through so much during pregnancy. You've had your baby for a while and you already love him so much.
Maybe it's because he's your husband?
But you definitely love this baby.
You stroked his adorable face as he looked at you, sucking on the yogurt wrapper inside.
He's so adorable!
Burping quietly, he handed you the almost empty bag of food that was delicious for him and he suddenly yawned.
This was even more adorable!!!
He didn't even have teeth! And that adorable sound when he opened his little mouth!
You wanted to hug him and keep hugging him!
This white-haired toddler is a miracle baby!
Even though you miss your husband as a grown man, you love this little one in your arms! He is so wonderful and perfect!
That white fluffy hair that you want to stroke endlessly! Those sparkling eyes!
You easily laid in bed with the baby on your chest, one hand rubbing your belly.
His little legs and arms lay softly on top of you in a folded position. The side of his head pressed against you as he fell asleep very quickly.
You want such a little baby so much now...
Baby Gojo Satoru. Such a sweet and beautiful baby.
When you woke up, the baby was no longer next to you. Your naked husband was lying next to you, caressing your belly with his large hands.
You don't know if you can choose between baby Gojo Satoru or adult Gojo Satoru.
The little one is so cute and innocent.
An adult can also be charming and lovable.
The only difference is their size.
Because your husband is a big baby in your hands whenever he can.
Trying to ignore his unclothed nakedness, you placed your hands on his cheeks, kissing him lightly.
"I want our baby to look just like you."
White fluffy hair, big blue eyes. Soft long eyelashes all around.
You will be happy to have your husband and Baby Satoru at the same time.
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