#yes this was written partly during opq can yall tell?

[miscellaneoussmp]

Writing more Roier angst hurt/comfort because I feel like it. Anyway, here's how Cellbit and Roier deal with emotions through redirection and a nap:

Roier is trying not to cry. He's been trying not to cry for days now. He's failed at the not crying part, actually. He's been trying not to cry in front of people, instead forcing a smile or at least a non-sad expression. Roier is supposed to be the ray of sunshine everyone wants him to be, the sunshine needs him to be, sunshine everyone expects him to be. He's already had his grief. It isn't fair of him to cry now. The breeze keeps his hair out of his face and makes the tears streaking down feel cool. Roier sits on the edge of the garden balcony. It made him feel hidden, even if he really wasn't. High above the ground, it felt safe.

There was suddenly a presence next to him, sitting with him. It's Cellbit, and Roier smiles through the tears. It was nice to have his husband around. Cellbit wrapped his arm around Roier, and Roier leaned his head into his husband's shoulder. He was grateful that Cellbit agreed to love him no matter what because he was pretty sure he looked like absolute shit. His eyeliner is definitely running, his hair is a mess, the dark circles under his eyes are easily noticeable, and a bunch of other things. Cellbit's hair is running through his dirty hair.

They don't talk for a few minutes, and then Cellbit asks if Roier wants to move to their bedroom. Roier nods, and they get up, hand in hand. Cellbit sits down in the middle of their bed, and Roier lays with his head in his lap. Cellbit's hand is back in Roier's hair. Sometimes, it's nice to just relax like this. There's a soft sigh from the brunette's lips as he describes the day he's had. Apparently, the only reason he's here is because he was getting too pissed off to keep working. Roier gives his best assurances, but they're hollow as even he doesn't really believe them.

With the hand in his hair, Roier feels sleepier than before. It's a welcome feeling, as he closed his eyes for just a moment. Cellbit is still talking, but it's just noise for noise sake at this point. He's talking about how he's glad to have Roier and that he's trying to use what he's learned in therapy about redirection and stuff like that. Roier finds it interesting, but he's getting sleepy, so he doesn't really talk back. He's proud, though. He leans up to kiss Cellbit before leaning back to welcome sleep for the first time in a few days.