#yes she's hermes LOL

[t4tdanvis]

Anyways ummmm imagine Mystreet demigods au. Yeah :)))

[triptuckers]

switching teams - percy jackson

Request: yes! "Hi there! Could I request an enemies to lovers! trope, where the reader is part of the ares halfgods." Pairing:  Percy Jackson x ares!reader Summary:  percy should know better than to try and fight an ares kid Warnings:  a lot of swearing lol, fighting, mentions of blood & injuries Word count:  1.9K A/N: can't wait to see more of dior as clarisse in the show she's such a good actress. thanks for your request, enjoy!

ever since percy got to camp a couple of years ago he's had it out for you. you don't know why, but naturally you decided to respond with the same energy.

he wants to test the ares kid's patience? fine by you.

for some reason he's always arguing with you and you're all to happy to argue back. somehow he knew exactly which buttons to press, how to get on your nerves.

there's always tension between the two of you, which reaches a high during war games like capture the flag. this time is no different.

you're part of team red, following clarisse's lead. percy is on the blue team.

not that it matters, your team is unbeatable. you're proud of your cabin for coming up with the best strategies. you and clarisse always draw up new battle plans, surprising the blue team whenever they think they cracked your plan.

and today you're going to win again. you know it.

you've been walking through your part of the forest, getting rid of any kids of the blue team you run into.

after a while, you think they've all said to each other to avoid certain parts of the wood, given that you don't see anyone for a while.

then you hear talking in the distance. smiling, you grip your sword tighter and creep closer to them.

'let's move, c'mon, these are y/n's parts of the woods.' says one of the kids. you recognise him as someone from the hermes cabin.

'right about that.' you say, jumping over a fallen log and blocking their path.

all three kids widen their eyes and you quickly count their weapons and cabins. two from the hermes cabin and one from athena. a combined total of three swords and a spear. you'll need to take out the athena kid first, they might be able to analyse your fighting style if you're not fast enough.

'I told you!' says one of the hermes kids as you charge them.

you were right, you can tell by the way the athena kid's eyes follow your movements they're trying to analyse your moves. but you catch them off guard and give them a hard shove after kicking one of their legs to the ground.

you make quick work of the hermes kids just in time for your team to run past, carrying the blue flag. you grin at sherman when he runs past with the flag.

'you know what to do!' he says with a wink.

you nod and take off. you're the best sprinter and best swordsman of your cabin.

the plan was simple. once your team got the flag, they would run through your favorite parts of the woods. you would hear them, join them and then run ahead of them, getting rid of any blue team kids in your way and clearing the path for your team.

so that's exactly what you do.

you run to the river, getting rid of any blue team kids you see.

when you see the river in the distance you can't help but to feel a sense of pride. you won again.

but before you can reach the river, something hard knocks you on your back.

before you can get up, someone appears above you, pointing his sword at you and smiling. it's percy. this fucking kid.

you lash out with your sword but percy is quick to block your blow.

'got ya!' he says.

'no you don't.' you say.

he may be pointing a sword at you, but you're not defenceless. with one swift motion, you kick percy's legs, sending him to the ground.

you're quicker, rolling over and pinning his hands to his side. there's no room for him to kick you with his legs.

percy's fighting to get his sword but this time you're stronger. this time, you smile.

'you need to be quicker.' you say. 'and you need to understand we will always win capture the flag.'

'we can still win.' percy argues.

'no, you can't.' you say. 'you're the strongest swordsman on your team. and I've got you pinned to the ground.

'so you admit I'm a stronger swordsman than you!' says percy.

'I said on your team.' you say.

you look up when you hear people cheering in the distance. your team has reached the river, with the blue flag.

'looks like we win again.' you say.

percy looks annoyed. 'get off me, the game is over.'

'say please.'

'fuck off.'

'say please and I'll get up.'

percy rolls his eyes and sighs. 'please, y/n, will you get off me?'

'because you asked nicely.' you say, pushing up off the ground, making sure to accidentally put your weight on percy's legs.

without looking at him again, you take off to celebrate the win with your team.

the next time you're playing capture the flag is three weeks later. you're excited to keep your winning streak going.

just as you've finished putting on your armour and checking all of your weapons, you see percy putting on a chest plate with a red mark on it.

'hey!' you say, getting his attention. 'you're not on our team.'

'yes I am.' he says. 'I already talked it over with clarisse.

'no the fuck you didn't.' you say.

'y/n!'

you look over your shoulder and see clarisse looking at you. she's your best friend, you always train together and she's a great team captain. but this?

'he's on our team.' she says.

'why?'

'because you two are the best swordsmen at camp. it's the logical choice for capture the flag. work together.'

'I will not-'

'not up for discussion. he's on our team, deal with it.'

you turn to percy, walking up to him and giving him a look of pure malice. 'just because you're on our team does not mean I won't hesitate to fight you.' you say.

'no maiming. no killing. especially not your own team members. those are the rules.' says percy.

'I don't care.' you say. 'don't get in my way.'

you hear percy mumble 'fucking ares kids' as you walk away to get into position before the game starts.

as soon as the starting signal sounds, you head to your favorite spot in the woods. there were always some blue kids who thought they could get lucky, but they always run into you.

you're waiting there, your eyes on the path, when you suddenly hear footsteps behind you.

you're just in time to turn around and block the other person's blow.

'you!' you say as you recognise the eyes looking into yours.

'me.' says percy.

'I'm on your fucking team you idiot!'

'I recall you saying it didn't matter.'

'piss off!'

'no.'

percy takes on a fighting stance. he better be fucking kidding. he wants to fight? fine. you can give him that.

'I want to teach you how to become better.' he says.

'at what?'

'sword fighting.'

that's it. it's one thing to attack you from behind. another to tell you he wants to teach you how to be better.

percy knows it's bad fucking luck to claim he's better at fighting than an ares kid. but you've got a tell, and it will get you killed some day.

'you have a tell. let me teach you how to avoid it.'

the nerve he has.

with two quick strides you're in front of him, bringing your sword down on him with all of your strength.

percy blocks it, but his arms are straining underneath the weight of your blow. you really are good.

he swings his sword to your left side but you jump aside and aim the next blow at his legs. he jumps over your sword and kicks you out of the way.

you spin around and attempt to drive your sword through the exposed part of his arm. percy gets out of the way, but only barely.

'you're using your father's strength to guide you.' he says, grunting in between blows of your swords hitting each other.

you don't respond, choosing to save your strength and focus on trying to hit him.

'you're faster than me. you could win.' he says.

fuck him. you are going to win. how dare he question you like this? how dare he question your fighting skills?

you take a step forward, ready to end this fight. but percy kicks your leg out of the way and pushes you, sending you backward.

'you step before you strike.' says percy. 'with your right foot.'

what the fuck?

'I have to give it to you, it took me a while to realise it.'

'been watching me, have you?'

you start to circle him, looking for an opening to strike.

'yes. now start avoiding the step before you strike.'

'I don't need a poseidon kid to teach me how to fight. you're doing this to distract me.'

'is it so hard to believe I actually want to help you? clarisse is right, we'd make a good team. you're almost as good as I am.'

'I can never be a team with someone who insults me to my face.'

'right. never claim to be a better fighter than an ares kid. noted.'

you race forward and strike percy, hoping he doesn't expect it.

he does. he easily blocks your attack.

you're furious. no one is better than you. certainly not percy.

you let your rage take over, going in for another attack, subconsciously taking one step before striking. percy kicks your foot.

you're breathing heavily. he wants to teach you? fine. you keep your footing in place as you strike, catching him off guard.

percy is too surprised and is too late to block your blow. you slice through his upper arm. it's not a very deep cut but it still bleeds. you smile as you see the blood start to slowly trickle down his arm.

you strike again, but only nearly hitting him. you can teach him as well. for instance, his weak point is his legs. you sweep them out from under him. percy falls to the ground as you point your sword to him.

'you're beaten.' you say.

'and you listened to me.' he says.

you hate to admit it, but he did have a point. once you focused on not taking a step before striking, you were able to beat him.

you reach out with your other hand.

percy is eyeing your hand suspiciously.

'I'm pulling you up.' you say. 'the fight is over. I won. I'm not striking an unarmed, beaten opponent.'

percy takes your hand and allows you to pull him to his feet.

'thought you didn't like me.' he says.

'I never said that. you annoy me. but ares kids respect good fighters. you're a good swordsman. and you were right. I have a tell.' you say.

'did you just admit to liking me?' says percy, smiling.

'I also said you're annoying.'

'but you like me.'

'doesn't make you less annoying. now come on, we have a flag to capture.'

the two of you take off to rejoin your team. during the fight, something had changed between the two of you. if percy could point out a flaw you didn't know you had, you're curious to see what else he knows about you that you don't know about yourself.

maybe it's a good thing he convinced clarisse to let him join your team.

A/N: If you want to request something, make sure to read my house rulesHere’s the list of characters I write for. Everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist. Please don’t repost my work, as I spend much time and effort on it!! Thank you for reading! Much love, Marit/Max

[ma1dita]

solipsism

a 'partners in crime' installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader

words: 5.1k

summary: (post-TLT) drink responsibly… trouble doesn’t; you punch luke in this lol (novelization spoilers? kinda canon-compliant)

The one where you finally pray to Hestia to keep your home safe, even if he's also trying to destroy it. Luke visits you four times during college, in a timeline opposite to yours (doctor x river song-coded) (lore expansion & explanation here) (Luke Castellan x fem!Dionysus!reader)

a/n: i hurt myself with this one. anyways its canon (to me) that we’re roommates now !!!! more to come like i promised even during my birthday break ! scream at me in the comments and feel free to reblog :)

(post 3/6, edited/betad @hotchfiles )

—

solipsism (the idea that only one’s mind is sure to exist)

You didn’t mean to send a prayer out into the world so strong that it would will an apparition of an Olympian, but burning cookies seems to be your specialty. Arguably, they weren’t the good kind, just the ones you grab in the freezer aisle of Walmart, and still, somehow they set your fire alarm off. Opening a window and waving through the smoke— Hestia, goddess of the hearth and home was standing next to the rickety dining table you bought off Facebook marketplace. 

“Holy shit, you scared me!” 

There’s mirth in her eyes at your reaction, though for all you know it could be annoyance—it’s not often that an immortal could be badgered enough to reveal themselves for an accident like this one.

“Dionysus was right. You’re too much like him for your own good,” she grins, taking a seat at the table like she’s an old friend. There’s a warmth to her unlike anyone you’ve met before—fire crackling in her eyes and an aura of serenity swaddling the air that you’ve never felt before in your student accomodations.

“I’m sorry I just… with all due respect, what’s going on?”

You go to toss the hot tray of cookies in the trash bin, before hesitating and putting them on your nicest plate. A gentle shove slides them over the table to the goddess, and she takes a crunch out of one happily.

“You were praying,” she states, like its common knowledge, “so strongly, in fact, I thought I’d make a visit to one of my most loyal devotees. Though in this case, you’re the object of his devotion, yes?”

Your hands are clasped across your lap and a familiar feeling spreads through you, then she jerks her hand up and points, “There. You’re doing it again. Y’know, it’s about time you start reciprocating the effort. Hermes’ son prays for you with intention.” You were thinking about Luke before she appeared—and hope glimmered like a tiny open flame. It’s still there, in the slow beating of your heart.

“He’s waging war with the gods. I don’t think he prays to them anymore,” you reason. Luke's offerings to the hearth must have been extinguished by the wrath he’s rained on Camp Half-Blood by now. The perfect storm.

“Not when it comes to you. Mortals never fail to surprise me. But it seems you’re a special case, my sweet. He’s made a home of you.”

To love Luke feels like having to keep a secret and never being able to tell anyone, but Hestia reaches for your hands across the table and looks at you knowingly.

“When I gave up my seat on Olympus for your father it wasn’t a sign of weakness, even if I did it so that others could be happy. I think your soul is a lot like mine in that you’ve given up so much of what you want to protect others. In turn, he’s doing the best he can to protect you; I listen to him every day, sweet girl. You are not weak for loving him still. There are generations of strength in your bones.”

“What else am I supposed to do? I search for him in everyone I meet and I’m not sure I’ll ever find that type of love again.”

These are thoughts you’d never told anyone—not Annabeth, not your father, not even yourself and surely never aloud.

“I hope you never do,” the goddess says, and you know it too.

i. no winter lasts forever (a night out after a drive home from virginia)

Flick. Flick.

“Come on, Hestia. Not you too. Don’t fail me now,” you mumble. The frigid metal of your zippo lighter rubs against your thumbs as you cup it in your hands, shielding the tiny flame that fights the harsh winter wind. Trying to focus as you lean against the brick of the Inferno, you take a deep inhale of smoke to warm your bones. Healing was never supposed to be easy.

Breathe in.

It’s somewhat of a routine you’ve made since getting back from visiting Annie. You’re a regular at this pub now—not even acclimated to the ins and outs of your sleepy college town, and though you don’t know the name of the hall your classes are in, you do know there’s a barstool in the corner of the Inferno with your name on it. There’s something funny about using your father’s gift as a form of fake id, and you wonder if he knows how heavily you indulge in your vices. Five vodka redbulls down the hatch have your knees feeling weak under the alley light until a stranger looms over you like a shadow.

“Those things are gonna kill you one day.”

Breathe out.

“Gods willing,” you laugh, stumbling over your boots and Luke catches you like he was never meant to let you go in the first place. The leather of his jacket is musky and his hair is buzzed. 

Either you were wasted or uncaring of who he was (both), you toss him your car keys and climb into the passenger seat. It’s a silent ride to your apartment besides you giving him the directions and Luke wonders how bad he must have hurt you for you to lay out for a stranger and waste away like this. But he’s the farthest thing from a stranger, even in this error in time and you’re still the daughter of the god of wine so after the third time you try to put your key in the lock he helps you because he hopes you’ll let him in.

“Y’know Annie would get a kick out of your haircut. Come inside.”

You’ve always been able to see right through him.

He’s standing in the hallway with his hand around your waist and he’s already broken too many of the titan’s orders by being here, so he scoffs, “You’re not gonna remember this by morning.” But you leave the door open anyway, dragging him by the wrist and your hand still feels the same in his even after all this time. What more is there to resist when there’s not much left of him to lose? 

This is the last time, he reminds Kronos, and there are monstrous hands around his brain, but yours are still gently holding his heart. The little part of his soul that hasn’t been eaten away holds on for a bit longer, tethered to your being by the way your hands are tied.

“I can, if you want me to.” 

He looks ready for war, and he is— yet you have him following you around the tiny living room almost in a trace as your arms loop around his neck. Luke doesn’t answer. He doesn’t know if you’d want to see him sober, especially when his absence is still fresh for you.

“Baby you look different from the last time we met,” you slur, stepping onto his feet as he takes you for a spin around the coffee table, dancing in the quiet. He’s older than you’ve ever seen him, voice deeper and colder. This is not the boy that ran from you in the forest many months ago. This is a man who’s seen horrors you haven’t lived through yet. You can deduce that he’s the cause of them too.

“So do you. Though still as beautiful as I remember,” he whispers like he’ll get struck for saying it. Your eyes are unfocused as he inspects your face, still soft and young with hope. The titan grips his features now, almost burning through his sense of self—though it’s not tangible he wonders if you could see it.

“I see you all the time. I just… usually have to drink enough to make it feel real. I just miss you.”

He looks pained at your words, and for a moment you wonder if he even heard you. Luke pushes you towards your room, an aura of darkness spreading through him like fire but he relents, pushing past the flames. He’s on borrowed time now, but Luke would gladly waste those minutes tucking you into bed.

Lifting your arms up, he pulls an old shirt of his over your shoulders, and his eyes catch onto the fact that you’re still wearing the dragon scale necklace he made you. Luke digs through your medicine cabinet while you sloppily wash your face and his calloused hands rub serums and moisturizer into your cheeks like how you taught him once upon a time. These are the things he won’t forget. Kronos can take it all away, as long as he gets to keep you. You lean against his chest and shut your eyes, scared that if you open them again he won’t be there.

“You’re not supposed to be here, are you? Are you mine?”

“I’m always going to be yours,” he says with no hesitation, “Four years later, and there is still not one living thing worth losing you,” he says, lips chasing after your fingertips as you trace his jaw. Your eyes flutter in exhaustion, and Luke’s eyes survey your room and he finds traces of you that he’s missed as he rubs your back lovingly like he has all the time in the world.

Your hands cup his face, making him look at you, and he surrenders himself to you as you pull him into a kiss. He’s a ticking time bomb about to detonate in your arms. The warnings that Kronos is beating into his head is nothing compared to the pain of knowing he won’t be with you for much longer. And he kisses you like he could save you from his blaze by doing so, lips and tongue and shattered breath saying I’m here, and this is real. Maybe your worst vice is not being able to wean yourself off the taste of him.

“Tell me what I need to hear. Even if it’s not true…Even if you’re not real,” you say between gasps, and your position on his lap makes him wonder why he’d ever give the world up and burn it down when it’s sitting right here and staring at him with violet eyes.

“It’s always going to be you and me. I’ll love you until the end of my days and then some.”

You laugh in the way that drives him crazy—though he already is, for loving you still. Luke lost all sense of himself when he left camp four years ago. All that remains is you, pushing him so that his back hits the bedspread. He lets you consume what’s left of him, and he’s on fire.

You wake up the next morning with a jolt. It’s still winter, and you’re still alone but despite the chill, you feel warm.

ii. autumn years (with a familiar visitor who finally shows up on time)

Knock, knock.

There’s someone at the door, but your date isn’t supposed to be here for another 10 minutes.

“Babe, someone’s here for you!” your roommate Jo calls out, and you tell her it’s fine to let them in.

The pantyhose clings to the lotion on your thighs and you fix the bracelet on your wrist, stepping out from the bathroom hollering, “You’re early, Kit! Don’t tell me you’re skipping to the good part; I’m a lady i–”

“Who’s Kit?”

Luke’s standing in the doorway of your bedroom and his eyes flit to the reflection of your naked back peeking through the undone zipper of your dress. You look stunning, lips painted red and eyes smoky, but you’re also furious. Too bad he’s always thought you looked extra hot when you’re mad.

“None of your business. As you can see, I don’t exactly have the time for this, Castellan.”

He shrugs, closing the door behind him gently and with the raise of his brow, Luke is leering at you like a teenage boy. Respectfully, of course. The glint of celestial bronze against his hip reminds you who he’s become though.

“I’ll make the time if you say the words, Trouble.”

Sighing, you step forward, but then he does that thing again from the last time you saw him out on sea, twisting the crick in his neck like he has to resist your touch.

“You’re still funny. Some old habits die hard I guess,” you scoff, turning and lifting your hair out of the way so that he can zip you up. He opts to not touch you, sliding the dress closed until it fits against your body. You think you can feel his fingers ghost above your skin, and goosebumps rise where he leaves and his breath is warm on the back of your neck.

“Leave your weapons at the door. I run a tight ship, unlike you.” 

Gliding away from him while his hands are still in the air, you turn and sit at the edge of your bed, crossing your legs as you nod at him. Luke picks up the pair of heels next to where he sets the sword against the wall, and like it’s nothing out of the sort, he gets on his knees. You offer a foot to him while he speaks, “I could tell by the taser on your bedside table. You’ve killed monsters before, why a taser?”

There’s freckles on his tanned cheeks and he smells like the sun. You wonder what he’s done to come see you tonight.

“I’ve found out that not all monsters are mythical. When…are you?”

His eyes dart away from yours, securing the buckles on your ankles, and his touch sears through the mesh of your pantyhose.

“A few months ahead.”

There’s an eyelash on his nose, and your finger reaches out to touch it, but he flinches away. Face pulling into a frown, you spit, “You never slow down enough to let me catch up with you, huh?”

You can hear the microwave whirring in the kitchen, your roommate none the wiser of the sound of two hearts breaking. The both of you suddenly realize this is the first time you two have been alone (and the same age) since he left camp. There’s a silent question of if it will ever happen again as he gets up from the floor.

“So you’re seeing other people. Must’ve been easy, h—”

You punch him in the face before he finishes speaking, and all he can do is laugh. You would never let him off so easily.

“Fuck you. What, you think you can just hop in here and act like everything’s okay? What do you want, Castellan? For me to grovel at your feet and beg for you to fix what you broke?”

And you’re right, he supposes. This is the closest to peace that you’ll get in this life you’ve created without him. He won’t be able to take you on nice dinner dates like Kit can, or hold your hand without feeling like fate is going to smite him for existing. You scoff at the lack of his response.

“What happens next?”

Luke watches you chew on your lip, and even if he shouldn’t touch you in fear that you’ll will away his reason for defecting, by the gods does he want to.

“What do you mean?” he mutters. The cord of his necklace is tucked into your dress now that he looks closer.

“If I’m right,” you say (and it’s rare that you’re not), “each version of you that comes to see me knows less, and each time I see you I learn more. You were 23 last time. Why didn’t you see me at 22?” You know he won’t have an answer, but this is the only time you’ll be able to ask the real him. The one that’s yours, just a few steps ahead.

“There’s already been a lot that’s happened since I last saw you.”

“Are you going to hurt me?” you offer him, like he hasn’t already. He can feel the bruise blooming on his cheekbone and he grimaces with what he’s about to say.

“Never intentionally. I’ll try not to.”

It sounds stupid coming out of his mouth and you feel stupid with how empty you feel just watching him. He’s made a home of you, choosing moments in time to visit, but when he inevitably leaves, then what? Luke taught you how to be a home, forgetting you exist until it’s convenient and now there are things about yourself that you can’t unlearn yet don’t know what to do with.

Your roommate knocks on your door asking if you want a shot of vodka before your date starts, and Luke is already walking towards it since he’s overstayed his welcome. He raises his sword to open a portal but you shake your head.

“Go out the way you came,” you swallow, fiddling with the copper pendant around your neck, “and take the purple umbrella in the hall. It’s raining outside.”

When you walk into the kitchen moments later, the front door shuts gently and Jo’s sitting at the table with a mouthful of ramen noodles.

“Is he warming up the car? Your date’s hot as fuck, babe,” she grins, steam coating her glasses.

Knock, knock.

Your phone buzzes and there’s another knock at the door. Kit is 15 minutes late.

iii. auld lang syne (ringing in the new year with an old friend, or more)

Your apartment is filled with friends and acquaintances, but who the fuck cares anyway? There’s 10 minutes to midnight and you’re crossed out of your mind. Holding onto a half-empty bottle of prosecco, your heels clomp over to the window in the living room as you crawl onto the fire escape. 

Clack, clack.

The air is chilly as you hug yourself, and you hear someone step out onto the stairs behind you. 

“What are you doing out here alone?”

You sigh, not even turning to look at him, “What are you doing here, period?”

He takes the bottle of prosecco out of your hands, making you swivel your head to look at him as he takes a big gulp. He’s younger again, and it makes you laugh at how fucked up your luck must be to never be able to see him when you want. It’s always been on Luke’s terms.

“You’re too young to be drinking that,” you drawl, knees bumping against his when he takes a seat next to you. Long Island is quiet at night, and the lack of city lights is nice when you can see the stars so clearly. Music blares through your JBL speaker in the living room, and the sound of cheers gets louder when The Neighborhood starts playing.

“We used to do worse,” he laughs, but something in it sounds hollow. The breeze picks up and you shiver, taking the bottle back from him and swigging it.

“All these visits…you sure do know how to make a girl feel special. But you never come in the summer.” 

He clears his throat, before leaning back on his elbows, “ I haven’t gone a summer without you since we were 14.” This Luke doesn’t know what’s ahead of him yet, but you realize that he’s right. Even now, he keeps up the habit of pissing you off and raising hell on Camp Half-Blood every summer. You notice he’s not wearing his camp beads, and he notices you shiver again in the chill. 

Clack, clack.

Your heels rattle the metal of the fire escape as you readjust your position. He takes off his jacket to sling it around your shoulders and neither of you realize you’ve missed the countdown until fireworks burst in the sky above you. The red and blue reflect off the planes of his face, but what stands out to you is the orange of his shirt, and you comprehend now where he just came from.

“I had to see you. I didn’t get to say goodbye when I left,” he says, and you take another sip before handing him the bottle to finish off. The only new years’ kiss you’re getting is through the lips that hold the last remaining drops of prosecco. 

You nod, remembering it all too well as you both watch the fireworks in silence. He wasn’t able to watch them properly the last time he was with you, Annie, and Percy just a few hours prior.

iv. spring cleaning (only big days are ahead for the both of you) 

It’s quiet in your college apartment this morning. 

The moving boxes are half-packed and stacked against the wall of the entryway and the smell of freshly brewed coffee in the French press on your kitchen counter permeates the air. Perhaps the idea of caffeine is the last thing on your mind, hands twitching as they smooth over the black polyester of your graduation regalia. There’s a few hours still before the ceremony, but you’ve never liked being unprepared. Pollux is driving your dad down the Island because despite the war you’ll inevitably be fighting in once you cross the stage and get your degree, D specifically told Zeus that he’d wage another if he was made to miss your big day.

Parting your hair to fit under the ugly graduation cap, the tassel swings in front of your face as you grab a few bobby pins from the side table. A golden medallion of Castor’s smiling face almost whips into your cornea and you stifle a laugh. D said in his Iris message last night that all three of them would cheer so loud you’d be able to hear it from Elysium (and honestly, jokes aside—he probably has a way of making that happen). A staggered breath leaves your lungs, and you’re filled with anticipation, though you’re not sure what for. 

Time is a thief and you know that too well by now. After all, you’ve spent the past four years running from the truth of your heritage—dodging monsters between study sessions and grief welcoming you every time you come home. Four years later, and who are you trying to fool? While walking across that stage later you might as well take a bow. After all, your ex-boyfriend is the reason why there’s going to be a war of both blood and ichor, mortal and undying and still, you find yourself in the middle of it. You’ve found yourself fielding questions this last semester like dodging celestial bronze, the questions always a little too close to home and the answers you give are too entertaining to be considered the truth.

So, what are your future plans? 

Oh no big deal, just going home and dealing with generations-old family drama. If it drives me crazy enough I might enlist! 

Gods. 

How do you even articulate that these past few years were those future plans? That you didn’t expect to be alive this long, much less have the comfort of feeling secure enough to dream… It’s been years since you’ve had a good dream to work towards with a boy you once knew holding your hand through it all. But the expensive piece of paper you’ll be receiving later feels fake somehow. 

Who does that belong to? Surely not you…surely, someone who dreams without bearing the weight that comes with it. Someone who doesn’t have to look over their shoulder everytime they walk to work in the mornings, who can convince children that monsters aren’t real without having to lie. Psychology was a great field to learn from the mortal side of things—to know the reasons why brain chemistry affects us so deeply instead of just willing it away with the touch of your fingers. You like making people feel better. But who can ever do that for you?

A gust of wind sweeps through your room, the multicolored tassels hanging off your neck swaying from the force and you shut your eyes knowing he’s there again. Citrus and musk, and something that’s just him. He knocks over your hamper, cussing under his breath until his eyes follow your motionless figure in front of the mirror.

“Shit. I can explain, um… I thought you’d still be asleep,” Luke sputters, his converse falling into your laundry pile like quicksand. He bends over, stuffing your pajamas and sweatshirts back into the bin with fidgety hands as his eyes take a quick scan of your room. There are no pictures of you and him on the bedside table. For a moment, he wonders what that means but then his cheeks redden when he picks up a pair of your lacy underwear. He shoves that down too.

“Big day today. You know I can’t sleep when I know something is about to happen,” you smile wistfully, and you keep your eyes shut for longer, because like this, it’s almost like he’s actually there in real time. In a world where things went your way, this would be his apartment too, and his clothes would be scattered around your shared bedroom like how they used to back in cabin 12. You always used to put them on The Chair, as he would call it—but Luke’s known to make a mess of your life regardless of your efforts.

“When isn’t there? Something’s always going on when you’re around, Trouble.”

Click. Scattered memories flicker in your head like images through a view-finder, spinning through your vision as you hear the sound of his laughter, gently tapping away at your heart again. Click. In the ones you pre-selected, he’s draped in sunlight, honey eyes sweet and kind, and his kisses are perpetual instead of an indulgence. Click. He’s always wearing faded orange, worn-out, but most of all well-loved. Click.

You open your eyes and they meet his own in the mirror. Time stops for once, letting you catch your breath.

Right now, he looks just as you like to remember him, as you knew him four years ago. Multicolored camp beads are resting easily against his broad neck instead of weighing him down, and he’s wearing the red converse his dad gave him. He’s too young, and so in love with you that it blinds him, but even then…now, he knows the look on your face and it makes him ask, “It’s not my first time visiting you is it?”

“You’re usually more discreet, the door right behind me wouldn’t have been your first option. But you’ve never failed to surprise me before. Tell me about your day, Luke.”

A hesitant smile crosses his face as he sheathes Backbiter against his hip, adjusting under the weight like he’s not used to it yet, and then he speaks, “We ate strawberries in the fields today, straight off the vine, but I argued that the ones you conjure will always taste sweeter to me. You smushed one against my face and I carried you home. You?”

You nod, turning around to face a ghost of your past, and the both of you meet in the middle only a hairs distance away as you admire each other.

“I graduate today. Annabeth’s driving up with her boyfriend and the rest of my family is coming to celebrate.”

He doesn’t know of Percy yet, of Chris’ insanity, of your brother’s death, and the immense hurt he’s caused everyone. The smile that lights up his face makes you realize he thinks he's still a part of this—with you. And you miss him—even when he’s right here, fuck, you miss all the versions of him that have come to visit, even the ones you don’t know of yet. Tears brim your waterline as you take a deep breath; the last thing you want to do is scare him away.

“This was his promise to me. By showing me something I was sure of—and I always knew you’d graduate and make it big. Wanted to see it for myself, baby,” he grins, tangling his fingers with yours like your strings of fate, and though you know the answer to your next question you still take a chance, just in case.

“If I tell you what’s happened since…you. Would it be too late to change your mind?”

“Trouble, do you want me to? Kronos’ plan is already set in motion. I think…” he swallows, and your vision blurs without your permission as tears start to fall. Through the film over your violet eyes, Luke frowns and pulls your fingertips to his lips, kissing each one. He hasn’t done that in years.

“Did I make a mistake? Do I lose you, in the end?”

“Angelface…” you sniff, leaning your cheek against his hand, “You were so scared of losing me that you didn't even stop to think of what losing you would do to me. I lost you so long ago, Luke. And you’re not mine anymore. I don't think you have been in a long time.” In these heels, your forehead is closer to his lips so he kisses that too, hoping that somehow this time he can will away your pain instead of his. He doesn’t know what to do but hold you until you say something again.

“I’ll tell you something you need to hear. And no matter what you say or think, babe—it’s the truth. Even without all the glory in the world I would still be yours. I still am, even if I can’t bear it.”

Though he’s holding you, it somehow feels like the opposite—a purer version of him in your embrace while he holds the broken pieces of you together with his golden touch. Right now, you look into honey instead of gold. The both of you look at each other in the mirror melded together like kintsugi, something good still shining through the cracks of you two together like this.

The sound of keys jangling in the lock of the front door lifts you from his embrace, and with one look you both know its time for him to go; Luke’s brows furrow as he mutters, “I’m sorry. I’ll fix this, and we’ll be together. I promise.” You nod anyway, hoping at least one of you believe it.

“Go home, Luke. She…I still need you. I’m always gonna.”

He’s already got Backbiter in hand and one foot through time when he looks back at you. Your voice sounds a lot like how it does when you tell him you love him. Luke wonders how long it’s been since you did. Your bedroom door opens with a bang and some laughter.

“Hey troublemaker, you left the dryer on! All your clothes are gonna shrink,” Jo grins, peeking her head through the doorway of your room and she’s looking at you in your graduation gown standing there alone.

“Were you on the phone? Who were you talking to?”

It’s quiet in the apartment again. Your fingernails make indents in your palms, bunching up into fists before you let go. A sad smile crosses your face as you let the settling wind kiss your cheeks, before reality kicks in and everything settles back to how it was before. 

“Just someone I used to know.”

—

“And no one can ever figure out what you want, and you won’t tell them, and you realize the one person in the world who loves you isn’t the one you thought it would be, and you don’t trust him to love you in a way you would enjoy.” -Richard Siken

luke taglist (some won't let me tag, turn on my post notifs?)

1/2 luke taglist: @kissingyourgrl @dorcas4meadowes @lorarri @andrewgarfldsgf @noodlesketchbook @10ava01 @poppysrin @ashisabitgay @timhalamet @liv1104 @leeknows-wife @mxtokko@bugcuti3 @luvvfromme @midmourn @2hiigh2cry @yuminako @niktwazny303  @lukecastellandefender @intergalactic-padawan @iliketopgun @annybah @dangelnleif @thegrinningghost @alyssajunelle @obxstiles @m00ng4z3r@visndcaitswhore @b0ok-lover @elegant-face-tree @this-barbie-is-having-breakdowns @amortencjja @idonevenknow1359 @maliaaaa @targaryenluvs @sakyira @dhdjdjjdhsjdiri

[mer-acle]

2nd Gen Olympian nicknames

(I know we kinda always use nicknames when we write about the sillies, but these are what I think would actually be used by the characters. Obv just headcanon, sorted by age lol)

Athena

Doesn't like nicknames, which makes her siblings use them all the more, particularly when they're younger.

Ath (on occasion, by Artemis, Apollo, or Hephaestus), Thena (that one kinda sticks after God Games), Attie (by Ares when he was a kid without self-preservation instinct, now sometimes by Hermes who has a deathwish), Thea (by Ody and Fam)

Hephaestus

Doesn't mind, doesn't care.

Heph (by everyone, even Athena surprisingly), Phaestus (rarer but it happens), Hephie (by Hermes, naturally)

Aphrodite

Actually loves nicknames, but loves terms of endearment even more. Ares hasn't used her name to her face in centuries, if he didn't call her my love, my darling, or my little dove, she would literally cry bc she would think he was breaking up with her.

Dite (The casual one most of her siblings use), Aph (Apollo, serious), Dovie (Somebody please contain Hermes)

Ares

His name has two syllables. One might argue for ARES (Athena, annoyed). Otherwise just endearment from Aphrodite, and descriptors like The Angry One. Please be nicer to Ares everyone he deserves better.

Artemis

Doesn't mind nicknames per se, but is particular about which ones.

Artie is out of the question (not even Hermes, Artemis is a ranged fighter), Temi or Ari is fine (Apollo, her girls, and on occasion some of the others)

Apollo

Is genuinely sad that Pollo is the only variant of his name that's halfway reasonable. Yes, people call him "Sunshine" (Okay, Hermes does, and his bf/gf do too), Pollo... honestly most of the siblings have used it but it doesn't really stick.

Hermes

Literally nobody shortens his name, but I guarantee every god and goddess has called him "little shit" at least once.

Dionysus

Honestly if the drugs kick in he answers to no variant of his name lol. It's Dio, by pretty much everyone, always (apart from Athena pre-God Games who stubbornly uses his full name)

[keerysfreckles]

omg i just rewatched mamma mia. what about luke as sam and the reader (child of apollo) as donna. like luke doesn’t turn to kronos but him and the reader break up so she disappears off the face of the earth (aka she runs off to greece). thalia’s tree somehow gets poisoned and the oracle sends luke, percy, and annabeth to go look for the camp’s former best healer. they reach a remote greek island and find the reader there, working as the local nurse/healer (and if you want, they also find out she has a little baby girl, sophia aka sophie 🤭 lmao luke and reader as teen parents). so much angst lol

the name of the game — luke castellan

pairing: luke castellan x apollo fem!reader

warnings: use of y/n and she/her pronouns, HEAVILY based on mamma mia (my fav movie ever), angst angst angst!!!!!!

a/n: i literally watched mamma mia here we go again today i love both movies with all my heart ALSO THE PJO SZN FINALE???????? HELLO?????????????

masterlist !

꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱

y/n l/n didn't plan on leaving camp half-blood.

she didn't plan on leaving her siblings and close friends, and her boyfriend. well, now ex boyfriend.

that was too complicated for her to even understand. one moment luke wanted everything to do with her. he wanted to be around her 24/7, and show how much he appreciated her. but recently he got distant, and wouldn't explain why.

y/n hated confrontation, so she decided to just ditch camp all together after the couple officially split less than 24 hours ago. she doubted anyone would go looking for her.

oh how wrong she was.

annabeth chase and percy jackson were on a hunt for luke castellan.

they were given direct orders from chiron to find the child of hermes. neither of them dared to question the centaur, making them search for luke as quick as they could.

annabeth's shoudlers dropped in relief once they came across luke. he was practicing his sword work against a dummy made out of hay and old fabric.

"do you have any idea why chiron would send us looking for you?" annabeth was straight to the point. percy was standing beside her, just as determined to get answers.

luke shrugs, "is there another new camper?"

percy shakes his head, "he seemed pretty urgent about it. you might want to follow us back to the big house."

the trio walked in silence back through the woods and through the cabins until they got to the big house. chiron was waiting for them anxiously at the end of the steps.

"thank you percy, annabeth," chiron thanks them for finding luke. "i'm not sure if you three are aware, the camp may be in danger. thalia's tree has been poisened. we aren't sure how or why, but all we need is the solution. a healer."

chiron looked towards luke when he finished his statement.

"again, i'm not sure if you're aware that y/n of apollo cabin has been missing since late last night."

all three have different expressions of shock on their face. luke however is mostly hurt. he couldn't believe y/n would just run off like that. he wondered if it was from the argument they had.

"i'm sending you three to go find her, and bring her back safely in order for her to save the tree and the camp," chiron instructs.

"we don't even know where she went," luke points out.

"yeah, she could be anywhere in the world," percy adds.

annabeth looks between the two boys, "wasn't she saying how if she could get away for the weekend she'd go to greece?" she ends her observation while looking at luke.

the boy quickly nods, "yes. she always loved the idea of," he pauses and his voice gets quieter, "running away to greece together."

after a moment, chiron speaks again. "so it's settled. you three will go search for y/n, daughter of apollo, and bring her back to camp to heal thalia's tree and save the camp. good luck to you all."

—

"we've been in this boat for hours," percy groans.

annabeth stops steering the large boat as luke stops tying a rope. they both turn to him.

"we've been on the water for maybe twenty minutes seaweed brain," annabeth teases.

"wait," luke walks closer to the younger campers, "if your dad's poseidon, why can't you just push us all under water through like an air bubble?"

"it would look a little suspicious if three teenagers showed up to an island with no boat and dry clothes," annabeth mentions, making luke's idea sink to the bottom of the ocean.

luke speaks up again, "what if y/n doesn't come back to camp with us?"

annabeth and percy don't have an exact answer for luke. that only makes him worried this quest won't work out in their favor.

"we'll cross that bridge when we get there," annabeth responds. "right now we just have to get to greece."

—

after docking their own boat at the port of athens, the trio was quick to buy three tickets for the local ferry. annabeth grabbed a map as luke and percy were trying to figure out the best method for finding y/n.

they agreed to search all the islands as quick as humanly possible. they'd ask locals if they knew of a strong healer, and if any of them were given an answer that resembled the idea of y/n living there, they'd know to check that island.

after searching through three and a half different islands, getting on and off multiple ferries, and still with no luck of finding the apollo girl, the trio was debating on giving up. until annabeth looked at the map again. she mentioned to luke and percy about one more island where y/n might be. it was much smaller so they could search more thoroughly.

it was almost sunset once they reach the island, meaning they had maybe an hour or two to find y/n in the daylight.

the trio split up as soon as they stepped foot onto the dock. percy searched the perimeter near the edges of the water. annabeth searched through the bundles of shops and hotels. while luke searched through abandoned looking buildings.

as all hope was feeling lost, luke noticed a building of to the side of the commotion. there was a dirt path leading up to it, with no shops or houses surrounding it.

he could only hope and pray that y/n would be inside.

the inside of the building did not match its exterior. the outside looked as if it was going to fall apart at any gust of wind. however the inside was much more lively than luke expected it to be. there were people inside rushing to get past one another. it seemed as if they were all rushing to get to the same person.

luke pushed through the small crowd, and all the air left his lungs when he saw y/n. she was helping someone from the island, who seemed to have a deep cut on his leg. luke could finally guess this was the hospital on the island.

"y/n," luke spoke up, making the commotion in the room subside.

y/n and luke's eyes locked. neither of them were sure what to do.

y/n excuses herself and drags luke outside by his wrist.

"what on earth do you think you're doing here?"

"i had to come and find you," luke tried to explain but y/n only cut him off.

"so you just followed me? i seriously don't want to be around you luke. i thought running away from you and camp would've gotten that through your head."

"y/n i didn't chase after you to try and fix this," he gestures between the two of them, "there's a serious problem at camp."

y/n chuckles, "what? did peter fall off the climbing wall and scrape his elbow again? or did sophie run into a tree for the fifth time this week?"

"y/n this is serious," luke tries to tell her.

"you can't be serious. you dragged annabeth and percy with you?" y/n gestures to the pair walking towards them with urge in their steps.

"i didn't drag them here, please you have to come back to camp," luke tries again.

"is he telling the truth?" she asks percy.

he nods, "thalia's tree is in danger, and so is the camp."

"why didn't you start with that idiot," y/n hits luke's arm before running back inside. she was quick to grab her things. she kind of threw everything into one bag that she might need at camp. most of her healing equipment and a change of clothes.

—

the boat ride back to long island was awkward, to say the least. percy and annabeth were both asleep in the downstairs area of the boat, while luke and y/n were dealing with directing the boat back to camp.

luke was steering, while y/n was sitting beside him. an awkward silence filled the air.

"what made you go to greece?" luke asks, not expecting the girl to answer.

"i just needed to get away," she busies herself with her rings on her fingers.

"from me?"

"from all of it. i just needed a break."

silence falls upon the two again. y/n only moves over to lean her head against luke's shoulder, instantly catching him off gaurd.

"i'm sorry i left," y/n admits, her voice as quiet as a mouse.

"you had your reasons. it just caught us off gaurd, that's all."

another beat of silence passes.

"that night, of our argument, i found something out. about us," y/n turns to face luke. he does the same to her, not caring about steering the boat at this very moment.

"i don't even know how to tell you," y/n rubs her hands over her face. luke simply takes her shaking hands into his, and runs his thumbs over her knuckles.

"i'm pregnant."

luke's world stopped. maybe he thought he was just hearing things. the waves probably distorted y/n's words.

after luke still didn't respond, y/n started explaining herself.

"i was worried you wouldn't react too well to it. so i figured not telling you would be the easiest thing to do. and coming here, to greece, was the best bet."

y/n's heart broke as she watched luke stand. he silently put the steering wheel in it's locked position, before going down the stairs where the four twin beds were.

y/n knew she fucked up. she didn't know how to fix it. or if it could even be fixed.

[ofswordsandpens]

what do you think could’ve been done better regarding camp half-blood besides spending more time there/pacing? i’d love to hear your thoughts!

!! okay I know you're specifically asking for things that could have been done better beyond spending more time at CHB, but straight up that one issue is really the crux of everything. -- The time we spend at CHB before the quest in the show is half the time we do in the book. (And for a different frame of reference, the book is aprox. 40% over by the time the trio is leaving camp borders.)

And since the show runners halved the pre-quest chb runtime, as a result we lose quite a bit of content that helped to establish context, tone, foreshadowing, character dynamics etc.

Because we have to prioritize Percy and Luke's relationship in the show, it forces the rest of the relationships that were established in CHB in the book into the background, (or simply makes them none existent):

We have pretty much only ever been told verbally about Luke and Annabeth's bond by this point (episode 5). They have a two second interaction at camp that's not particularly noteworthy and that's that. Imo that's not particularly compelling story telling lol. We'll likely (hopefully) get something from episodes 6-8, but I maintain we still should've gotten something more substantial between Luke and Annabeth at camp. I've said before, at bare minimum the show should have had Luke see them off at Thalia's tree like he did in the book.

I've mentioned this before but Annabeth and Percy's dynamic had a much greater establishment in chb in the book because she's the one that's his guide at camp and she actively seeks him out more. In the show, we have to give this role to Luke and while I can give this change between book to screen more leeway because, yes, we have the entire quest to build Percy and Annabeth's dynamic, I still didn't like that it pretty much forced Annabeth into the periphery in the show. As a result, it made her seem a lot more distant and aloof than she ever was in the book. (Shoutout to Leah's armor strap improv, she's doing more for Annabeth than the show runners are).

2. We don't really get see the effects of Percy being claimed as Big Three Kid at camp:

Yeah, Percy moves into the new cabin in the show but then almost immediately after he's off on his quest. Meanwhile in the book, Percy's claimed as a big three kid... and then we see how it ostracizes him.

He misses being in the Hermes' cabin. Campers avoid him. He sleeps and eats alone now. He has to have solo lessons with Luke because the others are scared. He's miserable! And none of those experiences were translated to screen.

Again, they told us that big three kids are taboo, but have not shown that impact.

Like the difference in reaction during the claiming scene between the book and the show pretty much sums up this discrepancy.

3. General loss of foreshadowing and tone:

Because we don't get as much Annabeth, we lose how in the book, she had been aware that something was wrong with the gods and surmised that something was stolen long before the quest. She shared this with Percy. It was a great showcase of her intelligence. It helped set the tone that something was wrong before the quest even stared. And all of it just, didn't really make the cut.

The hellhound attack also didn't make it and its just another loss of foreshadowing. Luke was straight up trying to kill this kid from day one. Percy was not safe even at camp. Things weren't okay ever.

The weather! Yes the boundary keeps the weather mild at camp but in the book Percy remarks on the huge storms that surround them at one point. Before he leaves there's a storm so bad approaching that the campers are nervous. Even before he got to CHB there were "inexplicable" storms all the time. I wish this had been maintained in the show even beyond the camp. The gods, Zeus, they aren't happy.

Also, I tried rewatching the episodes to find this convo but I couldn't so please let me know if it's there somewhere but I don't think Luke conveyed anywhere in the show that his quest "messed things up" for anyone? Like, sure, they could include this at the end, but I think it's more impactful when we see more hints of his bitterness early on.

4. Minor Nitpicks + More things I miss:

Annabeth should have gotten soaked by Percy's Supreme Lord Bathroom moment like she did in the book. Percy had flooded the entire bathroom and she wasn't speared. In fact, Percy was the only person who wasn't wet.

The self-filling goblets in the book + the blue Coke moment.

I wish the show had Percy like, white knuckling his minotaur horn refusing to let it go. In the book he saw it as the last souvenir of his mother, refused to let anyone else hold, and was afraid it would be taken.

Rip Argus :(

[arrowheadedbitch]

Okay, I've been discussing ideas about a PJO Psych crossover and it is now time to share my findings

Okay, so once upon a time Henry Spencer met a woman who when posing as a mortal went by the name Madeleine but she was actually a goddess, they had a kid, she was a minor goddess, so she was able to stay for a while, but eventually she left.

Yes, of COURSE Shawn thinks it's his Dad's fault

The goddess was Mnemosyne, the Greek goddess of MEMORY and the mother of the muses (works perfectly, right??!??!?!)

And Gus is his Satyr protector!!!

Henry does all the same training with Shawn to be a cop and such

Shawn gets his eidetic memory from his mother, the goddess of memory

I've also decided he gets taskmaster powers (can do anything he sees from memory) because that fucks hard

Shawn gets the record of fastest kid to get claimed as his mother officially claims him before he even leaves for camp

Here's her symbol by the way!

Anyway, when Shawn gets to camp, he's a total little shit

At first, the other campers think he's just not being claimed, depending on how you work the timeline here? Percy is pissed

Then Gus and Shawn explain that he actually got claimed before he even showed up (Percy vows to personally thank his godly parent for being an actually decent person)

So, they ask who it is, and Shawn WILL NOT TELL THEM

Why? Because it's funner that way!

They have an ongoing tally and betting pool of who his godly parent is, no one guesses it

He also keeps sneaking Mr D alcohol because it's funny and no one but Dionysus is happy about that

Gus is still his best friend that he drags into things, obv, they probably end up soul bound just like percy and grover

Juliet is a child of Athena

Lassie is a child of Ares and if your going by the show there's a super funny joke about how he looks exactly like Hephaestus but is the son of the guy he hates most, haha

Shawn KILLS at capture the flag

No one believes him when he says he doesn't have charm speak

Instead of becoming a SB Psychic, he ends up being this crime solving traveling cryptid (he's gotta keep moving bc monsters) (dont worry, he still visits camp pretty often and likes to drop by Santa Barbara to solve crimes and piss off his dad)

There was also a lengthy convo about each gods opinion of him of any of you wanna hear that

Shawn is the muse of doing weird shit

Also art lover shawn 🔛🔝, he's got plenty of muse talent, yall

Instead of pretending to be a psychic, he's pretending to NOT be muse adjacent

And now, a list of Gods people keep guessing for Shawn

Dionysus, Hermes, Athena, Aphrodite, Apollo, Hecate

And finally, gay people real???

As you can see, we mostly talked about Shawn lol

[gotstabbedbyapen]

What are your top ten Greek Mythology headcanons?

Ooooh I have a lot of Greek mythology headcanons, so it took me a while to select the top ten 😅 But I've finally done it!

Here is the final list:

10. There is an Eurotas River "tradition" for all the couples in the Spartan royal family.

I like to think it's "tradition" for all members of the Spartan royal family to find the love of their lives at the Eurotas River (Lacedaemon & Sparta, Amyclas & Diomede, Hyacinthus & Apollo, Helen & Menelaus, etc.)

The idea came to me because of the role and presence of this river in Apollo and Hyacinthus' myth (Ovid's version) and Menelaus and Helen's story (Euripides' play). HyaPollo had frequent river dates and MeLen swore fidelity with one another by the same river, so it's fun to think that the other Spartan couples also meet and spend their time together here.

9. Persephone is everyone's childhood friend.

This is also true in the mythos! Persephone grew up with Athena and Artemis in Sicily, her domains overlapped with her other siblings, the Homeric hymn to Demeter has a list of her nymph friends, and every once in a while someone is said to be Persephone's playmate.

She's a true social butterfly lol

8. The second generation Olympians also share traits with their grandparents.

I love to think that the younger Olympians inherit something from their Titan grandparents, you know? Here are some of the ideas:

Ares is loving and protective over his children like Rhea.

Persephone is intimidating and wield her scythe like Kronos.

Hermes is crafty and cunning like his great-grandfather Iapetus.

Apollo has Coeus' deep, intelligent gaze and Artemis has Phoebe's radiant smile.

Athena is unconsciously attracted to the ocean, the kingdom of Oceanus and Tethys.

7. All of Zeus' children, mortal or immortal, inherit his fury.

They can be calm like Apollo or have anger issues like Heracles, but once a child of Zeus get really pissed off, their act of wrath can be as destructive as their father's.

This explains why Artemis shot down Coronis and her family and Persephone inflicted a plague on Thebes.

6. The second generation Olympians (plus Persephone and Aphrodite) love each other in their own ways.

I really dislike depictions of Olympian siblings always at each other's throat. Yes, their history is complicated and dynamics aren't perfect but that doesn't mean they only have bad tension! Where is the nuance in their relationship???

Artemis and Apollo have seen the worst of one another and ridiculed each other for that. But if someone were to talk crap about their twin, it's on sight.

Ares is torn between following his mother and accepting his illegitimate siblings. He had persecuted the twins before they were born but later joined them in the Trojan war.

Athena might be distant from others at times due to her personality and domains, but there are moments she enjoyed dancing and playing music with her siblings.

And Persephone's case is the worse. She might not be an Olympian and stays in Underworld for half a year, but she had never expressed hatred for her non-chthonic family. Let Persephone have good relationship with her upper world family, too!!!

5. Hyacinthus has purple eyes.

Or, in elaborative words, the eyes ever so gentle like flower petals drifting on a calm lake in early spring, hand-painted by the finest of brushes with a meticulous shade of softly vibrant purple that could not be easily sought out in the tapestry of nature.

Sorry for the sudden poetic wax XDDD

Basically, I want Hyacinthus to have pretty purple eyes as one of his signature traits. It makes him stand out from the crowd due to the "divinity" it brings to him (because of the forth headcanon)

4. Hyacinthus' mother is Clio, the Muse of History.

The second-popular parentage of Hyacinthus in the myths, but I have lots of ideas and interpretations with this mother and son relationship:

- The son of the history Muse dating the god of prophecy. Past and future intertwine!

- Their domain and attribute! We study history to learn from the past mistakes and avoid repeating them. The hyacinth flower represents forgiveness, and I like to think it includes self-forgiveness as well. So Clio being Hyacinthus' mother can symbolize accepting and learning from your mistakes to forgive yourself.

- Family angst! Clio knows every way something can go wrong and result in her son's tragic end. So throughout Hyacinthus' life, she will do her best to prevent all possible demises that can happen to him, only to still end up losing him.

- It will give Aphrodite another reason to aid Hyacinthus' resurrection. Since Aphrodite is the one cursing Clio to fall in love with a mortal man and have Hyacinthus, she might feel guilty later when Clio was grieving her son, so she decided to help the mother and son reunite as repentance.

3. Polyboea becomes a huntress of Artemis.

We actually don't have any clear indication that Polyboea became a huntress of Artemis in the myths, but hey, it's not a bad headcanon! Polyboea died a maiden, and Artemis was fond of her enough to help bring her back from death. So it wouldn't be a stretch of the goddess recruit her into the hunter pack.

I have a lot of ideas for a Polyboea-centric fic after she became a virgin huntress, just her journey in perfecting the art of archery, making friends with the other huntresses, and learning to be her own person than just "the youngest princess of Sparta".

2. Apollo and Hyacinthus raise children together.

This heacanon definitely didn't come to me after reading a certain fanfic series hehehe...

The title said all, I like to thing after Hyacinthus' deification, he and Apollo are happily "married" and raise a bunch of kids together, adopted or from another lover (and they may or may not have a child together). Those kids will have the best childhood!

1. Hyacinthus and Polyboea undergo many trials in the Underworld before being granted resurrection and immortality.

As much as I love Hyacinthus and want him to have a happy ending with his loved ones, he's a potential package for physiological and psychological torture :)

There isn't much that we know of about Hyacinthus' resurrection in the myths other than him and his sister, Polyboea, being taken to the Heavens by a parade of deities. But I don't think the Underworld will allow two of their residents to go easily, so Hades and Persephone must have given Hyacinthus and Polyboea a trial like they did to Orpheus and Eurydice, but it will be 1000x worse because love me some blood-choking angst :D

For what the Underworld trials are and how Hyacinthus and Polyboea overcome them, they are will remain for now as ideas and concepts in the making for my Hyapollo fanfic

[thrashkink-coven]

Funny bullshit my deities have done that I think about constantly

Hermes using the word “cringe”

Hermes: you should say my name before you blow out my candle

Me: oh okay, why? Is it fucked up if I don’t?

Hermes: no it’s not a huge deal it’s just… cringe

me: CRINGE?! DID YOU JUST USE THE WORD CRINGE???

Lucifer frequently interrupting Lilith whenever she gives problematic advice

Lilith: You should curse that guy that keeps bothering you at work so that he gets fired and loses all his money lol

Lucifer: Please don’t pay attention to her right now.

Lord Cerberus getting super excited whenever we work with Hermes together

Me: I’m having trouble finding the right words for this spell I’m gonna call Hermes

Cerberus: THATS A GOOD IDEA!! ILL GO FETCH HIM!

Lord Ra asking for a little nibble of my food whenever I eat near his altar in the least subtle ways

Me: *eating a piece of pizza*

Ra: Ohhh woe is me… if only I had a little piece of pizza 🥺 if only a kind and funny devotee gave little old me a little pepperoni… 🥺🥺Doesn’t anyone ever wonder if Lord Ra likes pizza too? 🥺 No pressure. ☺️

Me: Aren’t you literally the king of the Gods

Inanna referring to herself with terms like “that bitch”

Me: Do you ever get sad that your worship has been abolished so many times?

Inanna: I honestly do not give a fuck 😊 I still come back every time because I’m that bitch and I always have been 😘

Me: Period

Lord Hermes making sure I get permission from Lucifer before working with him and/or other spirits.

Me: Okay I’m ready to start working now

Hermes: Did you ask Lucifer for permission before you invited Azazel and I into your space?

Me: Yes, I always ask dad for permission before I go play outside.

Hermes: Very good.

Lord Cerberus not at all being above the fluffy dog thing

Me: I know you’re a primordial death God with an incredibly important role but do you still like tummy scratches?

Cerberus: … perhaps… is this a hypothetical question… or are you going to do it…?

Me: can I?

Cerberus, already on his back: Do what you must.

Bonus: Lucifer not liking Eminem but being very fond of Hozier

Me, meditating at his altar and listening to music when “without me” starts playing

Lucifer: 😕

Me: what’s wrong? Your vibe just shifted

Lucifer: oh it’s nothing

*Song ends and Hozier’s “In The Woods Somewhere” starts playing

Lucifer: 🙂

Me: IT WAS THE SONG

[moikey-croikey]

one piece half-blood head canons bc i was thinking a lot about percy jackson and i was like “what if i combined two big interests of mine” so yeah :3

luffy: okay so i’m torn between zeus, dionysus, or apollo. zeus bc yk… he’s king of the gods, luffy wants to be king of the pirates, idk. apollo because he’s the god of the sun, then dionysus because i looked it up and he represents freedom (from what i understood). i’m leaning towards apollo (mainly bc i consider myself to be an apollo kid and i love luffy— i mean what who said that!!). but i can see him being a dionysus kid for sure.

zoro: come on now, obviously he’s an ares kid. like there’s nothing that can convince me otherwise.

nami: i’m torn between hermes and poseidon. hermes because she’s known as “cat burglar nami”, and poseidon because she’s a navigator. i’m really leaning towards poseidon.

usopp: okay so, usopp i can’t really pin down. i mainly see him as a child of demeter bc i can see him being her kid, idk probably because of his “green star” attack. i could also see hermes bc yk, god of trickery and usopp lies but meh. i really see him being a demeter kid.

sanji: that guy HAS to be the son of aphrodite. i don’t want to only boil him down to the romantic type, but i can’t see him as anything else personally

chopper: this is when it starts to get easy lmao 😭😭 anyways, chopper is a child of apollo; he’s the greek god of medicine, you see where i’m going with this. i can’t see him under any other cabin

robin: ATHENA IT HAS TO BE ATHENA. she’s so incredibly smart. also i love robin and i love athena and cabin #6 so yeah :)

franky: hephaestus, no way around it.

brook: apollo since he’s the greek god of music. i would say hades because yk, but music is more his thing.

jinbe: poseidon. can’t see him as anything else. and he’s known as the first son of the sea

vivi: i want to say athena. like idk she just seems like such an athena kid

i might do a part 2. i would’ve included ace and sabo bc they’re my boys and i love them, but i’m so undecided when it comes to them. and also i need to figure out law and kid and other characters like that lol, i’ve mainly been thinking about where i would group the straw hats lol (yes, including vivi. she’s a straw hat forever and always but i’ve never seen anyone deny that)

[happyk44]

Okay, despite what the Big Six play it off to be (that Hera, Zeus, Hades, Demeter, or Hestia are stronger/the strongest), each of them intimately know that Poseidon’s the strongest. Without nuance or question. Who’s the strongest? Poseidon. Yes, he’s an asshole and yes, all the others are very strong in their own ways but Poseidon tanks them all and by a huge margin. There’s no question to it. It’s not even close even if you match it to a particular skill, Poseidon has that sheer power to him that he could flatten the earth if he truly wanted to and then completely ignore the Primordials that hate him

(It’s why Zeus side-eyes his children so badly, because Poseidon’s got so much power and strength in him that his children could easily match them in power. It’s not paranoia if it’s a healthy amount of awareness 🤷‍♂️)

So! First and foremost, your opinion is your own! And if you like Poseidon being stronger than his siblings, that’s totally your prerogative!

But for me, I dislike that narrative. Even in PJOverse when people argue that Percy is the strongest, I’m not a fan. I find it unfair and dismissive to the others – mostly Jason since he’s usually the one everyone snarks in favour of Percy.

Nonetheless, back to Poseidon. One way you can write him being seen as the strongest of his siblings in a way that doesn’t weaken them is by pointing out that Poseidon is just more lawless than they are. He doesn't hold back, but the others do. So the full strength of his power is seen more frequently and is feared more.

Zeus is the god of law and order, god of justice. He has rules, he has beliefs. He might limit his power because he’s seen what uncontained power can do through their father’s hand. Additionally he’s the king of gods. He has to lead by example, so he must follow the rules he sets. He won’t go all out unless there’s no other choice.

Hades is busy with the dead and doesn’t get involved in much upper world stuff, so the strength of his power goes unnoticed by the others because, post Titan war, he just doesn’t display it. 

Hestia is a kind soul. She doesn’t have an interest in decimating the world and didn’t enjoy the fighting during the Titan war. So even when she did fistfight their enemies and set fires that burned people to ashes instead of warming them through a hearth, she held back the strength of it. She did the bare minimum to cause harm, the minimal amount to win.

Hera is queen. I also think that she is perfectionist, and like her husband enjoys rules and order (but maybe not to the extent that he does, lol). She has an image to maintain. Being a ruthless violent person capable of destroying the world is not how you maintain order and it demeans her image. It’s not how you keep your followers beholden to you. She is the mother figure – mothers do not wish to be obeyed out of fear, they should be obeyed out of love, out of respect.

I think, compared to the other four, Demeter is most likely to go full out with her power. But she is not goddess of the earth, she is agriculture. Grain. Harvest. Fertility. So her scope of power is a little more limited compared to her younger brother. However!! I would never think of her as weaker than him. Remember, she manifested an entire new season out of her grief and rage. She brought forth winter, famine, and mass death in an agricultural society. She no doubt brought cities and towns to ruin because of that.

The only way it stopped was because Zeus ordered Hermes to collect Persephone since he could not stop his own sister from destroying society in her grief. That’s some serious strength. But! I will say, I think while Demeter’s expression of power fluctuates dependent on her emotion, as Poseidon’s does, she is much more levelheaded than he is. Agriculture, farming, harvesting – it requires structure, understanding, logic. You can’t treat it willy nilly. And so she is similar in nature. Much more structured, focused. 

In summation:

Zeus and Hera are king and queen of Olympus, the ones who maintain order, who dictate the law. They lead by example and so do their best to follow the laws they have implemented. Additionally, since people typically follow the rules they’ve laid down, there’s less need to go all out, and they may prefer to rule out of respect and adoration, rather than fear

Hestia is a kind empathetic soul. Her core nature is fire and full-blown fire is destructive. It harms. So she keeps her self small and limited so the hearth may warm others, and not burn them or their homes

Hades is unseen by the others. Any displays of strength or power go unnoticed because he lives underground and does not get involved as frequently in things as the others do. Not to mention, the underground is his kingdom, so as with Hera and Zeus, there’s less need to go all out because the people who live there follow his rule

Demeter’s powers are based in her emotion, but her scope of power is limited, and her experience of emotion is not as fluid as the ocean. It has stability, like the earth, and as with agriculture, she maintains herself in a healthy manner to be as fruitful and productive as she can be. She is more likely to go full out than the others, but not as much as Poseidon

Poseidon is the ocean. He obeys no one, he follows no rules, he crosses every line. His emotions whiplash left and right and he will express them as viciously as he sees fit whenever he sees fit

So yeah, while Poseidon can appear to be the strongest of the six, I think that’s fully because 1) he displays his power more frequently than they do, and 2) the others contain themselves better than he does.

Regarding their kids in PJOverse, this can be seen as:

Zeus’s children are similar to him in that they do not go out all unless they have to, focusing on orderliness, command, and strategy

Hades is the underworld, the underworld has so many gods beneath its wing, so his kings have a large scope of power and tend to limit themselves to different areas of their father’s domains for sake of ease. In Nico’s case, he is raised and trained by ghosts and gods, people who do not understand that he has mortal limits and don’t train him within those limits

Poseidon’s kids are more emotional, more active, more chaotic. They may be seen as more powerful because they react with their power more than their cousins, but that doesn’t mean they are more powerful. If a full out battle were to occur between them (save for maybe Demeter’s kids) and they were all equally as trained (i.e. all have the same level of experience), then it would be up in the air on who would win

As for Demeter’s kids, we’re never really exposed to them in canon, aside from Katie, and we don’t see her do much of anything. Perhaps they aren't born as often and so they can’t train each other the way other demigods would because they don't overlap, or because they don’t view themselves as strong as their cousins, or they simply would rather focus on growing strawberries than tap into the “hey maybe I can get everyone’s food to rot into ash because I’m upset” side of their mother. They might even be aware of that part of themselves and deeply dislike it because it goes against their core nature

As I said, it’s totally your prerogative to characterize them as you see fit, or however works best for you. I mean I gave Zeus anxiety so, lol, I’d be one to talk if I said otherwise, but, personally, I find it more interesting to view them as all equals in strength, just varying in display.

Besides, mythos wise, we know that Zeus is likely the strongest given, when they tried to betray him, they failed. And there were at least three of them to his one – Poseidon, Apollo, and Hera. Hera was strung up above the stars, dangling in humiliation above chaos, and Poseidon and Apollo were stripped of their immortality and sentenced to servitude in building that wall for whatshisname. If Poseidon were stronger than his little brother, I doubt Zeus would’ve been able to pull that off. Granted, in general, I don’t think Zeus should’ve been able to strip anyone born of godhood of their godliness but like, whatever.

[apollosgiftofprophecy]

Who do you think is Apollo's favourite uncle, and favourite aunt, both in rr!verse and in general?

Ah yes, the long debated question. We know Apollo is everyone’s favorite, but who is his favorite? 👀

Favorite Uncle: Poseidon

I feel like this is true in mythology and the RRverse (unless Eclipse happens. Then it’s Hades. sorry Poseidon lol)

this was especially true during ancient times when the gods were a lot more interactive with each other. Not to mention Apollo and Poseidon had LOTS of myths where they interacted!

we have their time in Troy. Also that one time Poseidon was like “aight I need u to fight me, okay? But u have to start it because I’m supposed to be the responsible one since I’m older”

And Apollo was like “…🤨 no thanks ❤️”

I bet Poseidon chose Apollo because if he has to fight someone, he would like to duke it out with his favorite nephew lmao

And he DID get that fight in the Dionysica. Idk the details of it besides Hermes going “wtf” at Poseidon 😔 but one day I will…I just have a lot of books to get through first lmao

Favorite Aunt: Demeter

“but what about Hestia—”

THAT BE WHERE YOU ARE WRONG! :D

sure, Apollo likes Hestia, but you’re gonna tell me that Apollo, god of light and averted of plague—which includes pests like locusts and mice—wouldn’t adore Demeter, goddess of agriculture???!!!

u are WRONG if u say no ❤️

and like imagine this: baby Apollo arrives on Olympus after his nine-year exile and is OVERWHELMED by it.

are you gonna tell me Demeter didn’t take one look at this wide-eyed lost child and go “I now have joint custody” and proceeded to mother hen him.

this would ALSO open the gateway to Apollo and Persephone becoming friends, because I LOVE to idea of Persephone being the Weird Big Sister :3

There’s Athena, the one who keeps them out of Major trouble. Artemis who provides a feedback loop for Persephone’s more wild side. Persephone who drags them around Greece for something to do. And Apollo, the baby brother who hangs with his sisters and loves them so much 💕💕

and they do each other’s hair because I say so ❤️

Demeter is also there so she also is the aunt who spent to most time with Apollo, further reenforcing the fact she’s the fav aunt :3 she also does their hair and put sunflowers in Apollo’s <3

and I think this ALSO goes for both mythology and RRverse! Seems kinda cool that light’s favorite family members are water and earth, two things combined with light to make…life.

I am so poetic <3

[willowingstar]

will we get more fics for the Pearl ocean AU? If so will it be a continuation of the first one or will we get a timeskip and a different story?

it will be a continuation! currently, i have three "arcs"/"sagas"planned for it (but this will change indifinetely!). first one being calypso saga, judgement(placeholder name lol), scheria.

(DO NOTE THAT ALL OF THIS WILL STILL BE HAPPENING UNDER THE "PEARL OCEAN SAGA" AU NAME!!! think of this as like section or arcs)

calypso saga takes place immediately right after pearl ocean saga, in which telemachus is washed up on calypso's island. this saga talks about his time here and just how much his time there will change him as a person.

judgement saga is basically the wisdom saga of this au. athena basically goes to zeus in hopes that he can release tele from calypso's land but things go to shit as a) athena literally just fought him not even ten years ago and b) "OH YOU WILL NEVER GET MY 658TH WIFE NUH UH" -Zeus so athena gets zapped and is down momentarily (hermes was there watching and said a big fuck you to zeus. ody was also there but judged tele instead. he had also agreed to release tele so when ody basically saw not only ATHENA get hurt but the possibility of tele not being able to be free he CRIED. crode even. so poseidon and zeus basically threw him to his shell and locked him there until he calmed down. P.S. - he did, but he's like half dead on the inside.)

scheria saga takes place after telemachus left calypso's land in "im not sorry for loving you" style (but hermes smuggled him out illegaly instead). this is where, after the guidance of hermes (and athena, yes she is present here even though she has like half of her body fractured), they lead tele to scheria where he can be able to get help and set sail towards to ismarus. during his sail he had an encounter with ZEUS (thanks to hermes and his stupid decision to illegally snatch tele away) and he basically thunderbringers tele and like... uh, lets say half his crew died (NOT EURYLOCHUS THOUGH!!! HE GETS THE PLOT ARMOR HEHEH eurylochus my beloved). Eury and Tele's ship was the one that basically survived along with five others but they're hurt by the encounter. even with this encounter they still set sail in hopes of just being able to go home since ... at this point tele being TEN YEARS AWAY the war at the kingdom they're trying to save already ended but at the very very end of this saga they have, yet again, another encounter with poseidon... in a not so fun way.

so yeah! thats all :3

[caffeinated-chaos-bean]

Update on Izumi's design process!! Plus her incubator lmao.

Its taken me more than a week to get to this point. You have no idea how painstaking it is when you get so involved into a character's design process and want it to look good, especially when you know its mostly because of how much of a perfectionist you are at the end of the day.... Over all? I'm glad I finally have a design I like. I tried SEVERAL different leg and wrist options, skirt options, dresses, etc.

And before aaaaanyone decides to come for me due to giving her a high-low skirt that shows her pelvic area, its on theme not for sex*lization purposes. She's a water themed mahou and in turn I want her design to reflect that, hends a lot of the scalloped edges and the seashells and her being barefoot (although that's also due to her just not liking to wear shoes if she has the choice). Plus it also alludes to frilly swimsuit bottoms that can be seen in both "beach episodes" and in lolita swimwear (yes that exists people). The pearls and shells allude to oceanic themes, and because she's also being given wind undertones, she gets little wings on her ankles. Little Hermes nod lol. And the hip pauldrons? Those allude to Atlantis and how a lot of mermaid royalty tend to have protective armor in more modern scifi.

Tomorrow after work I'll try my hand of what wrist or hand accessories to give her. I know that I want her fingers to be free at least, along with maybe her palms. Outside of that I have no idea.

Also still thinking up names for her incubator. He's gonna be white mostly but instead of pink/red markings and fades on the ears, its probably gonna be teal or something. Also his ear...tail...thingies? They aren't folded in how he's posed. Its actually arounded and bulbous, kinda like how the bottom of an octopus plushie is.

[mer-acle]

Do you have any athena hcs?

Uhhh

How much time do you have lol

I'll try to list the short ones so this post doesn't get too long. Due to writing about her a lot I have a lot of lore lmao

1. Athena is the eldest child (Hephaestus born shortly after her). Nobody who's spoken to her once would expect anything else honestly

2. At the time of the Odyssey she's about 4000 years old (No reason or proof I just decided) Her first 200 years give or take were spent with Triton (read: Pallas)

3. She only got assigned with Warfare as her domain after officially joining Olympus

4. Her emotional distance with her siblings is partly due to Pallas trauma, and partly due to Zeus liking to "keep her to himself" (read: isolated as the favorite). She gets along best with Hermes and Hephaestus (yes, I refuse to accept Erechtonius happened) bc the former is just as chaotic as herself and the latter shares her creativity and both don't ask for a big commitment from her (again. No Erechtonius and no arranged marriages in my plotline let me have this)

5. Dislikes being touched. Her siblings learn to accept it, Zeus does not. She doesn't try to enforce it with him. (Yes in every iteration of her that I will ever write, there will be a touch-starved to hug plotline sue me. I need therapy)

6. Never braids her hair. She used to have braids when with Pallas, but since then she has never worn her hair this way again. She also wears it quite a bit shorter than she used to back then.

7. Her grey eyes are inherited from Métis. They also glow in the dark. She has perfect night vision.

8. Perfect memory. Also she has bird's eye view versions of even her own memories (hc that one of her domains is history so that's why) It's how she found out that Zeus interfered with Pallas's death.

9. Used to have an Oceanic themed armor before joining Olympus (Métis made it for her) She allows Hephaestus to make her a new one, shedding the Ocean symbols in an effort to please Zeus.

10. Connected to her status as a virgin goddess but in contrast to Artemis, Athena dresses pretty covered up, doesn't undress even for bathing (in ancient Greece sometimes you'd keep your chiton on as a sort of bathing suit almost, but being naked was more common) (also this is not 'purity' stuff btw I just get that vibe from her, Artemis, literally go off queen you're doing great)

11. Classic but good, cocks her head like an owl like all the time. Also says "hmm" a lot (intonation may vary)

12. (Remember, my hc, you can do whatever you like) I think all the virgin goddesses are acespec/arospec in some capacity, but Athena is the cut and dry aro/ace/repulsed one. Like... It's a big fat no from her (I'm projecting hard btw)

Anyway twelve seems like a good number I hope you like them :) I picked those that aren't specific to Epic and can be applied to myth!Athena too

[anonymoushouseplantfan]

Steph the Alter Nerd is reading Omid’s new book.

Following the live read:

I joined late so Steph was already reading. She was starting the Sophie section. Seriously, why pick on Sophie who just puts her head down and focuses on work? That’s strikes me as unnecessarily vile.

Omid apparently thinks Charles hasn’t modernized the monarchy. Dude is an environmental icon and we now have a blended family in BP. That may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but you can’t deny that it’s modern.

Apparently Omid writes pages and pages about Charles’ “leaky pen” incident. It’s just a pen, Omid. Omid thinks this means Charles may not be up to the job, lololol. I’m dying. Mind you, Omid worships Harry who stripped in Vegas, wore a Nazi uniform, and called his fellow soldiers names. But yes, the leaky pen is far more significant than all that, somehow.

Really boring part about government stuff. Charles negotiates and reaches compromises with the government and that’s apparently bad? Also, Charles didn’t know what to expect after he became King??? Lolololol.

Charles lost sympathy for the Harkles after the documentary. Well, duh. We all did, Omid. That documentary was a huge own goal.

He blames the Royal Family for the documentary’s melodrama? Seriously? Who was crying on Oprah? Who was crying in a rented Vancouver mansion with her head wrapped in a towel? Who dropped hot, salty tears on her Hermes blanket? That’s the person responsible for the melodrama.

Anne supposedly kicked them out of Frogmore. I suspect this is fanfiction, but I love it. I want it to be true. This is my headcanon now.

And I do thin fanfiction is the right term for this book. The BRF is super popular right now so the book thesis itself (that the BRF is in trouble) is pretty fantastical.

This book seems very, very boring. Omid seems to be desperately trying to argue that Charles’ first year went badly, but that’s just not reality. Omid used to be better at spinning than this.

Make the Royals Great Again? Uh, that was done in 2011. Everything we are seeing now was planted way back then, down to Kate’s leafy crown. There’s a general lack of both self-awareness and historical awareness in this book. Omid writes like someone who first became a “royal reporter” in 2016…which is exactly what he is. Too bad, because I do think there’s an interesting analysis that could be made regarding 2023 and it’s place in royal pr. That’s above Omid’s pay grade though.

Lol, Omid discusses UK politics and it’s every bit as much of a disaster as one would expect. Stick to gossip, Omid.

Ok, Steph’s hydrating, so let’s step back for a minute and recall what this book was supposed to be. This was to be “Finding Freedom 2.0,” a chronicle of the Harkle post-Megxit success story. The publishers clearly didn’t like that and they made Omid write a book about the family as a whole. That’s because there was no Harkle success story and the publisher didn’t think another Harkle book would sell. Unfortunately, Omid is a Harkle specialist. He can’t write a book about the family (let alone successfully argue for its imminent demise). He simply doesn’t know enough.

Back to Steph. We’re now in Harry’s military service? Er, why? We jumped from 2023 to 2016 and now to the Afghanistan War?

I agree with Steph that Omid’s trying to associate the royals with MAGA and I can’t even articulate how stupid that is. Completely different countries, completely different cultures, completely different iconography. Just doesn’t work.

Now we’re at the Coronation Concert? The royals are in trouble because Elton wasn’t at the concert! Lolololol. The Harkle bubble is out of this world. Basically, if their inner circle wasn’t centered (Oprah, Elton, Omid, etc…), it’s because of a MAGA conspiracy that will bring the royals down.

Something, something throne. Charles looked awkward again. Constitutional crisis!

I feel like I’m grading student briefs. There’s a way to argue this and there is evidence you can cite for this argument, but this isn’t it. You shouldn’t write pages and pages about a leaky pen and then minimize the bags of charity money as “perception.” You should start with the bags of charity money then use the leaky pen to bolster the “perception” argument.

Another disagreement with the government. Aargh! That should be lumped together with the other arguments with the government. Or it shouldn’t be mentioned at all. You’re arguing that Charles is and old-fashioned idiot who is not a good king, so why make him look like someone who is aware of current social issues and engaged with his government?

Racism. Finally! No wait, it’s boring.

Charles had an affair with Camilla. Lol, that’s not exactly news, love. The time jumping is driving me nuts.

Took a break to let the dog out and now we’re in Andrew’s interview. Of course we are.

Will exiled Andrew. I hope this is true. Wait, that’s the famous “power struggle”? Andrew??? I don’t think that’s a power struggle. That’s just Charles passing the buck.

Oh, lord. More Andrew. That’s it. I’m going to bed. I’ll tune back tomorrow.