#yes i'm a lazy fuck when it comes to show ages

[bitchimasnake-sss]

"banter, baby!!" ft. the monster trio!

you know sometimes sexual tension turns into petty fights ft. luffy, zoro, sanji x fem!reader set-up: you knows and he knows and everyone on the fucking crew knows what is up between you two but instead of fucking it out (as you should), you both decide that it's banter time! warnings: petty insults, pettier them, pettiest you m.list

luffy:

- was luffy easygoing? yes. was he friends with almost everyone? yes. but was he also a dumbass who started to fight if he felt like it? also yes. - you're not sure how it started to be very honest, maybe you told him off and asked him to leave some food behind for the rest of the crew - that explained how the captain of the ship: strawhat luffy of the strawhat pirates, a man with an immense amount of bounty atop his head sat pouting in front of you with his arms crosses - that also explained why you also sat with your arm crossed, staring him dead in the eye - "luffy." you hiss, "stop being a baby and apologize." he looks appalled, "you stop being a baby and apologize." "you alMOST ATE ENOUGH FOOD FOR LIKE 8 PEOPLE FOR FUCKS SAKE?!" he looks solemn as he whispers, "a growing child has his needs" - what????? - you fold your arms tighter against yourself, causing your cleavage to be more prominent to his keen eyes, "you know somebody who looks at you wouldn't ever realize you're ace's brother." he pouts more, voice whiny now, "what does that mean?" "i mean he's so thoughtful and charming and a sensible human being and look at you, sharp as a butter knife!!" "YOU TAKE THAT BACK. I LIKE BUTTER!" - WHAT???? - "you're impossible." "uh-huh, uh-huh and i'm about to become more impossible now." "wha-" - dragged you to his room and showed you how impossible he can be

zoro:

- yeah, roronoa zoro was your sparring partner. yeah, one can say that you were a little bit mesmerized everytime his muscles rippled against his tight t-shirt. yeah, maybe you were drooling just a little - that shouldn't distract everyone from the fact that he was a smug, cocky asshole when sparring (its like you've been training since the age of eleven, stfu zoro) - "tch, yn. you can do better than that you know?" you hold back obscenities, narrowing your eyes, "shut up, how about that?" - he's sheathing the swords, standing against the deck with his arms crossed over his broad chest. he doesn't seem to have broken a sweat. a light hand runs through his cropped hair and he gives you a lazy smile, "you're quite weak, you know?" - he laughs a bit at your fuming state, finding some amusement in the way your cheeks burned an you held onto the dagger more tightly "you're pissing me off." your experienced hands throw the dagger at him, aiming for his head "am i?" his smile broadens as he catches the blade in his hands. he twists the blade on his palm, eying you leisurely, "maybe you should redirect all that anger into trying to land a blow on me, how about that?" - "you know, zoro." you plaster on a fake smile, "i have often heard a rumor about you" "what kind of rumor?" "ahh, just that you have a fourth sword." your smile drops, "just didn't know that sword was stuck up your ass." - his face fell for a second and then a smug smile crept across his face. his calloused hands found your wrist, leading you upto his room "how about we fact-check your rumor?" - uh lets say he does have a fourth sword. thats all.

sanji:

- honest to god, you had come here to help him prepare food. was he supposed to just be your cooking partner? yes. but were your eyes running over his flexing forearms as he hiked his shirt sleeves and cut something up? also yes. was it getting too hot here and you knew it wasn't even because of the food? also yes. - you were stirring the pot as sanji hovered behind you, his hand reached into the cabinet above you and momentarily, you were stuck between the stove and his body - and it's making you feel things - "sanji" you spoke abruptly, "get away from me, please." "huh?" he backed away, an apology ready on the tip of his tongue - maybe the blush on your cheek was evident because his expression changed from apologetic to smug. - he inched in closer, "oh, im sorry, my love" "stop it, stop getting so close to me" "oh, why? something wrong?" he drawled out "no, you just smell like fish right now. that's why, move it." - now why would you say that - he just chuckles, "you know, i am a cook, so i would smell like food. why? wanna devour me?" "no." you mumble nervously, "if anything, i am allergic to fish." - why would you say that again??? - "trust me, darling, you should give it a shot. maybe you'd like the taste?" he winked at the last statement - that night, you did give it a shot - maybe the cook is as delicious as the food he makes

a/n: listen to me, i just know sanji's banter will be straight-up flirting, i dont make the rules. hope you enjoyed lmao m.list

[locke-esque-monster]

I know nothing about the show 911 other than what I've learned from Tumblr.

But my god, as a Destiel shipper am I rooting on Buddie's behalf to go canon this week. Like the do-over I think we could all use.

Like yes, Destiel is canon. That doesn't mean I'm not a little bitter about what we didn't get to have.

But like an aging sport coach who never quite achieved their dream, I'm rooting for this new kid on the block to go all the way instead.

Let Buddie also go canon 2 days after a presidential election in the exact same goddamn timeslot SPN used to occupy (albeit on the different network).

Let them kiss. Let them fuck. Let them have their first fight. Figure out how to navigate parenting when dad's best bro is now his boyfriend. Have cute, lazy mornings in bed together. Get engaged. Get married.

There's such a mixed bag of emotions that come with the ending of SPN and what we got. And I can't change that. But it could be a stepping stone to do better with M/M ships.

And I just want other fans out there to have the utter joy of their ship going canon without all the complications.

[daytaker]

greetings from clown anon, adored the fic very silly <33

i apologise if i’m filling up your inbox but may i ask for an mc that’s a mortician? that or is just desensitised to death and knows a lot about it, like i imagine whenever the brothers in early season 1 used to do like very specific threats mc would be like “uh actually that’s not how that works” essentially acting like a bit of a smart ass completely glossing over the actual threat

thanksies in advance (´∀｀*)

Clown Anon MCs - [ Clowncore MC | Death-Fixated Science Geek MC | LeVeyan Satanist MC ]

(I'll be real I have no memory of the specific threats and I was too lazy to go look for them but I will follow along the lines of the prompt anyway.)

I'm going to do this one in bullet point form. Hope that's okay.

(CW: a bit gross at times. not quite gore.)

Now I Am Become MC, Destroyer of Worlds: A Death-Fixated Main Character in Obey Me!

Read below the cut.

They're extremely curious about demon anatomy. And not in a kinky way. They want to see how similar the structure and layout of demon organs are to human organs. They want to get full body X-rays when those wings and tails pop up. They want to get it on video when they appear and disappear. Because what the fuck. Yeah, yeah, they get it, magic exists, but still, what the fuck?!

They fully expect Beel to keel over and die one day from overeating. There is no way any single individual can consume the way he does and survive. They're actually hoping that if he does, they'll be able to carry out the post-mortem and see what exactly was going on with that stomach of his. I mean, yes, they'll be very sad he's gone, but at least he'll have died as a martyr to science!

Dead shadow hog? Taxidermied. Dead fire newt? Taxidermied. Dead devil zebra? Brought home, dissected, taxidermied. The brothers don't really like to go to their room because of the constant dizzying stench of formaldehyde that comes from it.

Sometimes they'll just sit and stare at one of the brothers. If asked what they're doing, they'll simply say, "Observing." Reactions to this range from Beel's "Oh, okay," to Levi's "I'M GOING TO MY ROOM AND NEVER LEAVING FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE."

So Solomon's immortal, is he? How immortal, exactly? Is it just that he'll never die from old age? Could he die of a disease? Surely he could die from injuries, right? Has he tested this? Can they test it? Please?

....Please?

Wait, wait, wait. Satan came from where? How? Why? What the hell? Lucifer, take your shirt off, they need to do some investigating. Satan, you too. Lucifer, show them your back. No scars? Not even from ripping your own wings off? Hm. Satan, do you have a bellybutton? ...That's weird, you definitely didn't need an umbilical cord. And you're saying he came out full-sized? Stop telling them it's magic! Magic is just science that people don't understand yet.

Actually, all of you get in here and strip, this has been a long time coming. MC needs to figure out what the hell is happening here.

Why not?

Pleeeease?

Satan, let's talk about one of your murder mysteries! They do this exactly one time, and never again because MC kept interrupting to point out plot holes and inconsistencies. It was so annoying. It kind of ruined the genre for him for a little while.

Leviathan, MC wants to ask you about how you survive underwater. Levi--- Hey, where are you going? Levi?

They write their paper on comparative anatomy of demons, angels, and humans. Diavolo gets a little queasy after the first page and gives them an A. He doesn't want to read the rest, he trusts they did a thorough job.

[in-hav3n]

okay HEAR ME OUT. you're the third blog i send this to because the others didn't repost it and i desperately need people to hear this because i can't stop thinking about it.

i just know that the reason james has always had such hot muscular arms is because he fucks in the air or against the wall.

i'm sure.

(i want him to fuck me like this)

okay, that's it, have a nice day. bye.

PS: in case someone is confused (i doubt it but you never know) my point is that if he fucks someone against the wall or in the air he has to lift her and hold her there for quite some time which means: 💪🏻

𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐔𝐓

WARNINGS : NSFW - rough sex - sex scene - age gap

It's an ordinary day in Colorado. You are lazy on your couch, busy reading a random magazine.You are completely bored by the lack of interesting articles until you heard James coming from the backyard door after working on his cars in his garage all the afternoon. He greets you with a smile and a little hand wave on his way to the kitchen. He needs to clean his greasy hands and finally joins you with a glass of water in his hand. Sat at your feet, you would both chatted for a while about your day and stuffs you've done.

"You're pretty sweat", you comment after a while, noticing how shiny his arms are. James had leaned a bit, resting his back against the couch as he was scratching his head pensively. He turned to see your hand on his skin and chuckled.

"It's pretty hot outside and I worked a lot. Had a lot of heavy things to carry in the garage to fix that old car I bought", he explained as flexing a bit his arm.

"Whatever it was...made you do a bit of work out", you giggle, your hands looking very small compares to his arm's size.

He was wearing a black tank top which was a good outfit that shows perfectly how tough James was. You bite your lower lip and start to squeeze his arms, palpating his muscle with your fingers. James giggles too at your remark and flexes his muscles more to show you how impressively muscular they were.

"But that's not going to the gym or carrying heavy stuffs that gave me those arms you know", he declares with a grin, turning his head in your direction, not leaving your gaze. You raise an eyebrow in a curious way.

"Oh really? What is it then?", you tease him as going on your knees to be closer.

"You wanna know, hum?". James' hand on you naked knee to rub your skin slowly is enough to make you shiver hard. You hum and nod frantically, even more curious.

And this is how you end up on his laps, arms around his neck while his hands were on your thighs, lifting up he edge of your dress over your hips. You were sharing a passionate, hungry and feverish kiss as taking each other's clothes off. His tank top first, in a hurry, before you take care his short with shaking hands. He helps you by removing it completely, kicking off his flip flops to get rid of his clothes.

Meanwhile his hands slips the straps of your dress. James moans of satisfaction when he discovers you're not wearing a bra today and expose your breasts to feast on them. You whine of pleasure and roll your hips on his hard member, showing him what you want. He is already hard beneath you and your cunt is already pulsing at the idea of being fucked so unexpectedly on this lazy afternoon in your living room. Even tough it wasn't the first time that such things happened...

"Take off your panties baby", he commands between two kisses, your tongues moving perfectly together for a sensual dance.

You moan in agreement and roll next to him to quickly take if off, throwing it somewhere else on the couch. You also took off your dress in a hurry. Once done, you straddle him again with a giggle of pleasure, rolling your hips again on his hard member. The physical touch between your soft pussy lips and his hard dick soft skin is enough to drive you both crazy.

"So needy...", James whispers with a grin on his face as caressing your butt, even adding a spank. "You want me to fuck you now?"

"Oh yes baby, do it", you reply as biting his earlobe. He groans low like a beast. You are driving him crazy as well with your touch and gestures.

James hurries himself to glide his hands between your two bodies to grab his member, puts him in a straight position to help you sit on it. You slowly sink on, stretching you out until you arrive at the base with a gasp of pleasure.

"Oh yes...", you moan low, almost in a whisper, eyes closed, leaning against his shoulders for support. You are used to this position and James knows you need to take your own pace first to adjust yourself at his size. So he just leans against the couch, hands on your butt to join your ass movements, helping you to get ready.

"That's it baby", he says low as watching you bouncing slowly on his dick, feeling the enjoyable feeling of it inside your warm and wet pussy's walls. "Get yourself ready...move on my cock...so I can show you my trick".

You frown, keeping the rythm, curious to know what he's talking about. His trick? You simply nod and move until you feel it's time.

"I'm ready James", you tell him in a gasp as you move easier on him, your inner walls being now completely stretched out and you pussy being wetter.

And this is how suddenly James grips you tight, holding your body against his as he carefully gets up from the couch. You quickly wrap your arms around his neck for support, tightening your legs against his chest and crossing your ankles behind his back. He holds you tight with his hands under your butt and you feel his dick popping out of you.

"Oh!", you moan of surprise with a giggle. James chuckles with a smile at your reaction and walks slowly. You have no idea where he's going.

"So...what's this trick, big man ?", you tease him with a grin, your fingers lovingly rub his neck and the short hair there.

James smiles bigger and he only answers you when your back hits the wall of your living room. You let out an other low gasp of surprise when your skin hit the cold material.

"I hope you're ready cause I'm gonna pound into you so hard..."

"So hard uh?", you tease again as biting his lower lip in a sexy way, not leaving his gaze.

"So hard you won't be able to walk tomorrow".

You giggle loud at his comment. "Really ?".

James doesn't give you time to tease him more. He manages to free one of his hands to line up again with your entrance, even adding some saliva to help and in one push, he thrusts in you. You gasp of surprise, closing your eyes to enjoy this new sensation. You feel a hint of pain tough, the angle is really different and quite new,

James knows you well and is able to read your expression. He feels your pussy contracting around him and understands you need some time again to adjust. He stops his moves until he sees you nodding to move again. He moves slowly first, holding you tight against him with his two forearms underneath your knees, your back still on the wall to have a balance. He opened a bit his legs to have some kind of balance too and for more strength to push inside you.

"Oh my god James...", you moaned with a low voice, your head resting against the wall behind you for some seconds before resting on his shoulder.

"Does it hurt baby?", James rested his cheek against yours, whispering into your ear.

"Not anymore...feels good", you pant, still not believing how good this is.

He starts to move a bit faster, his hands enveloping you butt to slowly make you bounce on him.

"Oh yes...feels even better...like this". This was like doing some work out, like lifting some weights. And a smile appears on your lips at this thought. This is how James got his big and tough arms then and you absolutely love this.

"Don't stop baby please...", you beg with moans, your nails digging into his shoulder's flesh now. James groans and moans low, his head swinging back as he enjoyed the feeling of your warm walls tightening around his dick.

"You're gonna make me cum if you keep moving like this", just saying this is enough to stretch you even more and his dick finds his way deeper inside you. You gasp again with a loud whine, gripping his neck stronger to not fall. James feels it too and this helps him to pound deeper, pouding your spot with no mercy. It was good, it was hard, it was obscene the way your body were moving but you didn't care.

"OH YES!", you moan louder again, your head leaving his shoulder to hit the wall behind, as you start to pant harder. Luckily no one could hear your desperate and loud whines of pleasure.

"Gonna...cum...baby?", James asks, also panting as he keeps the pace, making you bounce on his cock as well as moving his pelvis to thrust deeper. He was doing a real work out exercice, using all his body to give you such pleasure.

You simply nod, head still against the wall as your teeth bite strongly your lower lip. You are on the edge of cumming hard, harder than you felt before with other positions. This one is just perfect to make you feel new sensations and James perfect moves are just the cherry on the cake.

"Yes...like this...don't stop, oh my god! I'm gonna cum James...I'm gonna!", you pant harder and harder until you let go this good and powerful sensation that was growing inside your inner belly. You are not able to talk anymore, you're only able to mumble some words and high whines or moans while your eyes roll behind.

James grips your knees tighter to keep his strength until the end. He wants you to ride your orgasm and feels your walls contracting and pulsing around his dick. "Cum on my cock baby, that's it! Enjoy it...feel it", he pants, feeding his own excitement with this sight of you reaching your orgasm.

He stops moving only when he feels you relaxing, when the pleasure invade your senses and spread in all your body. You have a satisfied smile on your lips, some sweat drops between your breasts. Some hair are even stick on your forehead. He smiles and pushes your body against his chest to kiss you tenderly. Then he slowly pushes out his swollen dick before helping you to go back on the floor. His lips never leave yours.

"I understand know why you have big arms baby", you tease him after the kiss, biting his lip in a loving gesture. Your hands touch his arms, still impressed by what just happened.

"I told you, I never did work out...but I practice this a lot", he grins and leans again to kiss your tenderly. You giggle during the kiss before your hand wrap around his swollen and hard cock.

"Now let me show you how I work my mouth's muscles", you tease him with a sexy glance as kneeling in front of him, ready to give him the best blowjob of his life...

A/N : Here's a little reminder of how big and sexy James arms are 🤭 I picture your idea really well in my mind sweet anon. I used HTSD era cause this is one of my fav and I love his tough daddy style but it can be with any era you want ! This is how I imagine this...

[jadewritesficshere]

Painting

Modern!Eddie Munson x Female!Reader

Contains: nudes, mutual masturbation, phone sex

18+ only

Eddie flopped face down onto his mattress with a sigh. After working all day, playing at the Hideout, and then hauling all of the bands' equipment, he was wiped. He wanted nothing more then to smoke and go to sleep. His phone pinged with a notification. A contact under the name "Loser" had messaged him, causing a split second of confusion before a lazy grin spread across his face when he realized it was you (he had forgotten he changed it when high). You had been unable to come see Corroded Coffin play tonight as you had made previous plans.

Loser: How did it go?? Good?? Bad??

Loser: Was that one chick who wants to be a groupie there??

Eddie: went ok. Y u jealous?

Loser: just curious lol

Eddie: sure. Wbu?

Loser: Good! Robin and Nancy came. We had a nice dinner. We did paintings! Robin's looks better then mine. Mine looks like shit 😔 now just taking a bath and relaxing.

Eddie: show me?

Loser: lol no???

Eddie: y not? I'm sure it good

Loser: you sure?

Eddie: yes

Loser: fine

Eddie doubted your painting looked bad. You always tore yourself down, even when you did amazing things. He always wanted to throttle you, but knew he would be a hypocrite if he did. Eddie rolled onto his back and looked at the ceiling. He would convince you one day that you were awesome, but until then he would just have to keep reminding you. His phone dinged with a new message from you. He opened it and saw a picture attached and-

Immediately dropped his phone. His heart picked up speed. His eyes widened and face flushed. Eddie dove for the phone as if it were a life preserver and he was drowning. He couldn't believe his eyes. He licked his lips and stared at his phone.

A picture from your neck down. Bubbles in the bath around you. Water was running down your collarbone towards your tits. Your nipples barely covered by the bubbles. One boob having no bubbles around it at all, but your hand flipping him off blocked him from seeing more. He was greedy. He wanted to see more, and had never imagined you would send him this to begin with. Eddie looked down at the tent that had formed in his boxers.

Loser: ask nicely next time 😤

Eddie groaned and his dick twitched. You had totally misunderstood him, he had wanted to see your painting- of course he was more then glad for this outcome. However, he couldn't quite unsee what you had sent, nor would he want to. Eddie reread your text. Next time means more than just this once. Means maybe he could see more. Means maybe he has a better shot with you then he thought. He already overthought things with you many times, and now his brain had just switched to overdrive.

A million thoughts ran through his head as his hand traveled south. He paused briefly," Oh fuck it." He grabbed his dick over his boxers, causing the outline to be very noticeable. He took a pic before sending it to you. He would have felt bad about not sending a message with it, but he would have sat there for ages trying to think of a response. And he couldn't find it in himself to care as he pressed lightly against his dick.

He dropped his phone on his stomach. All Eddie could think about was you as he pulled his dick out of his boxers. Your soap covered tits. How beautiful they looked.. He licked his hand before slowly grasping his dick and squeezing the base, causing the tip to flush more. The pressure causing him to moan. He slowly stroked up and down his length. He picked up the pace, canting his hips up to meet his hand. Part of him wanted to go slow, but the rest of him wanted to get this over with quick so he could do it again and again and again. His chest heaved and sweat started to form on his brow. A sigh fell from his lips that quickly turned to a moan at the thought of it being your hand wrapped around him. How small your hand would look on his dick. How-

His stomach tensed and he jolted as his phone started vibrating and your ringtone played. The vibrations on his lower stomach felt so good, he was tempted to let it keep playing, but the urge to hear your voice was stronger. With his free hand he grabbed the phone and answered. "H-hello?" Eddie asked, panting into the phone. "Oh fuck, Eddie," your voice higher than normal sounded like music to his ears. Eddie moaned and your response was a whimper. "Fuck babe, see what you do to me?" Eddie's voice felt like sandpaper, he was surprised he could even find words. "Uh-huh." The sound of water splashing caught Eddie's attention," holy shit. Are you touching yourself?" "Wish it were you."

Eddie's mind went fuzzy as he picked up speed. The schlick noise picking up, his mind filtering out everything except your moans. "Sound so good. Wish I was there." Eddie mumbled, feeling his tip leaking generously. He was so close. "Fuuuck Eddie I'm gonna-" your sentence was cut off with a moan and he lost it. His hips bucked without rhythm and cum spurted everywhere. He never understood the phrase of people seeing stars behind their eyes until now, but they were more like fireworks. He had never cum this much in his life, not even when he had first found porn.

He slowly came back down, a euphoric feeling enveloping him. A warmth spread in his chest as it heaved, trying to catch a breath. He looked down and saw his shirt covered with his release. Your chuckle pulled him back to earth. "Uh so that happened...so whatcha gonna do about it Munson?" He hummed," Think i should ask you for a date." "You should."

Eddie had the biggest grin when you finally got off the phone, date planned for Friday night. He looked down at your contact name before changing the s to a v. He was going to find that painting you did and make sure it hung over his bed, so he could remember this night forever.

[slashingdisneypasta]

DadsBestFriend!Foxy Coltrane x Fem!AFAB!Reader || Smexcerpt

Plot: You got him. You got yourself an old man who's hopelessly smitten with you. And you're pretty crazy about having him, too.

Warnings: Smut. Dads best friend. Younger woman (21-25)/older man (50's).

Tagging: @slxsherwriter .

"I'm completely fucken obsessed with you, sweetheart." Foxy tells you, tucking your hair behind your ear almost romantically after you sink down on his cock; a sleazy romantic smile on his rugged features.

"Yeah," You huff, your cunt that's been aching and slick for him since you left your parents house for here stretching and fluttering around his size. "I know."

He gives a slow chuckle, the grin on his mouth turning lazy. "Cocky little bitch, huh?"

"I mean- " Slowly you start to move your hips, taking his cock leisurely in and out of your tight hole. You try not to sigh from the pleasure, so as not to build up his ego unecessarily huge. But no one's ever fit so perfectly in you before you managed to get yourself in your dads friends bed- even if that bed was a single in a tiny dirty apartment in the shady part of town. "Why wouldn't you be obsessed with me? I'm young," grind. "I'm tight," roll. "And I'm hot. You're a lucky old man." You wink, grinning.

"C'mere," Foxy's voice is just a smooth, southern groan as he guides your lips down to his; lifting his head up off his old musky pillow slightly and stretching out his stubbly neck in order to kiss you deep and slow. His tongue slips past your lips and feels along yours with the skill of an experienced kisser and you groan, parting your lips wider for him and grinding your hips deeper against his.

"Ah~ " You finally sigh, making your hips move faster, take him rougher against your sensitive needy clit as he just lays there and enjoys it. Lazy old fuck.

"Come on, dollface, you can do it. Fuck yourself out on my old cock. Cum once, all on your own. Then I'll take you down memory lane, huh?... " Your eyes fall closed listening to his drawl. "Remember a couple nights ago??... the first time you slid onto my cock, babygirl?... "

Hell yes, you do. You can picture it in your head. He had been helping your dad out all day with his guns, showing him how to properly clean them and having a beer or two (or 6) over the course of the day, and eventually your dad left to get you all some dinner (chinese food, for Foxy's preference). You mayyy have changed your outfit, perfectly prepared to say the short shorts and oversized graphic t were your pyjamas, but of course Foxy didn't call you out at all. He was all-too-happy to just enjoy the view.

Then, with just a little bit of harmless flirting, you got him to come up to your room and fuck one into you just before your dad came back with dinner.

... he called you a sneaky little slut at the time, chuckling and shaking his head at you as he buckled up his belt again leaving you in your bed. And he hadn't been wrong. The little snark had you rubbing yourself later on into another orgasm, mouth open and arching off of the bed into your own fingers, in that same bed he took you in.

It was so hot being with him in your bedroom. He'd been on top of you in your little purple childhood bed, his jeans pulled down to his knees, his mouth burning hot against yours and his tongue down your throat as he pounded your cunt. You can remember the squeaking of the bed, the way your cunt sucked him in desperately after all those months of seeing him so domestically and wanting him, the feel of his chest under your little hands-

Now you can feel your orgasm approaching painfully fast, feeling so good. His fat cock ruined you and you knew you would never get enough. A boy your age would never be enough again.

"Fox-... Fox-... Fox-... " You chant, rolling your hips up and down against his pelvis. When a spasm of pleasure rushes through you, you're forced to bow your head and keep going. More- "please please please- "

"You can do it... " Foxy puts his hands on your hips, finally, but still doesn't offer any help. Just watches your cunt sucking him in, soaking him, and your body's mashing together; looking vulgar and impossibly hot. "You're a big girl, Y/N, a big grown-up-girl. Right?"

"Wo- woman." You amend, struggling to keep it together as the pleasure hits an all-time-high.

With a teasing leer on his face, scratchy beard pulled across his face, Foxy gives a sarcastic nod. "Right... "

Finally your orgasm hits you and you come apart on his cock; lips falling open and a sigh slipping out you.

You get one moment of reprieve, glowing in the aftershock, before Foxy's grin turns wicked and he suddenly sits up, gathers your wrists in one hand and flips you over onto your back; getting on top. You give a squeak of surprose, then fall into a mess of giggles; teasing him. "Slow down there, tiger... " Then Foxy thrusts his cock right back into you as deep as he can, and a choked moan disrupts your silly, pretty laughter.

With a roguish smirk, Foxy carefully and slowly rubs his pelvis against yours. It's such a dirty feeling you have to turn your head away and squeeze your eyes shut for a moment. That gives him a chance to nuzzle his nose deep into the crook of your neck and take a deep whiff. He gives a sigh. "Damn, baby...

Do you know what you do to me?"

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

https://www.tumblr.com/longing-for-rain/755847912227028992/ember-island-playersracist-caricatures-or-meta Please read this ABSOLUTE bullshit...

"The show is made by white americans and some of it aged poorly, therefore NOTHING about it says anything about war, racism and propaganda, even though we have multiple episodes in which we see people of the racist nation waging war going as far as changing history books to feed children propaganda from a young age"

Truly briliant criticism. Totally not a load of bullshit from someone who pretends to care about racism yet is buddies with miss "Zuko must marry outside his race to fix his defective genes because he is one of the good ones despite his kind being prone to violence."

Also it's crazy how they keep acting like the show didn't very clearly say "Aang kissing Katara when she just said she didn't know how she felt and if she wanted to date him was wrong." Boy is literally kicking himself for it.

Now, was it a lazy writing choice to make Kataang fans go "Oh no! What if our ship doesn't get together after all?" and then be plesantly surprised by the finale a week later? Yes, and it was a dumb fucking idea because the episode works fine without it. But it's not the show saying "See, boys? If you keep pestering the girl you like, she'll eventually give in!" Katara gets mad and avoids Aang for the rest of the night for getting pushy. He clearly feels like an idiot for it.

...Holy shit, I think I just found out why Zutarians only understand that ZUKO changed - because he literally turned to the camera to say "Hello, Zuko here. I used to be one of the villains, but now I'm sorry for the bad things I did and want to help the heroes."

This entire nonsense could have been avoided if Bryke had known some of the audience members are dumber than 7 year olds and the Ember Island Players episode ended with Aang going "Hi there, everybody! I'm Aang! On today's episode I learned that, no matter how strongly you feel about someone and how frustrating it can be to not know how they feel about you, you just can't rush things. Just tell them you like them then let them come looking for you later if they're interested"

[erumai-maadu]

YOU KNOW WHAT I just read your post about the Kohona 12 hc and one thing I gotta mention: TEAM 10 AND TEAM 8 BEING BUDDIES YES PLZ THIS IS SO IMPORTANTE!!! Not just bc of their senses dating (which is also a factor) but-- Team 10 is an intel-gathering team, Team 8 is tracking and capturing, CAN YOU IMAGINE THE POSSIBILITIES????

These two teams would have been the BEASTS of the spy network. Ibiki is desperately trying to convince everyone to join the Anbu squad. The biggest hurdle is Hinata being a Hyuga (her eyes can get stolen) and Shikamaru (he's just lazy).

Ino makes sure everyone looks polished. They're gonna learn what you had for breakfast 12 years ago, hunt you down and drag you back (dead or alive), looking like models whilst doing it ✨

(i'm so normal about this, I totally don't think about them all the time)

YOUR BRAIN >>>>>>>>>

every day Ibiki goes to Asuma and Kurenai and is like “please make ur kids join ANBU in the future pls i’m begging u” and their kids r all like haha no thanks. hinata is like “maybe” for one second and her uncle is immediately like NOT THE BYAKUGAN. ibiki is so sad. he just wants some good spies. he’s trying his best.

anyway some random side thoughts i have about them.

In the part 1 anime filler Shikamaru does call on Shino and Neji for tracking a lot. I guess because Hinata’s a girl and they can’t let her do anything ever :/ truly bizarre. there’s literally a filler episode where Hinata goes “I can see paper bombs all over the village!” and everyone immediately turns to Neji and doesn’t do anything until Neji confirms it. i hate this show.

doyalist sexism aside, Shikamaru heavily relies on Shino and the Byakugan’s sensory abilities to formulate his plans and so I think he very quickly grows used to having team 8 with him when Tsunade lets him form a squad. It helps that they spend a lot of time together (thank you senseis dating) and I’m sure that aside from his own squad, they’re the ones he relies on most.

Choji and Kiba are probably the front line fighters, with Shino and Ino backing them up and Shikamaru at mid-range advising/strategizing. Hinata probably pulls double duty as their long-range sensor and a close range fighter/flanker when things get hairy.

everyone on both teams gets along well but it’s a struggle to get Kiba and Choji to get along at first. Kiba is a bit of an asshole (understatement) and Choji isn’t a huge fan of how aggressive Kiba is. Kiba, for some fucking reason, just canonically doesn’t like Choji when they’re younger. I’m sure there were a lot of fights and a lot of insults thrown around before Shikamaru and Ino got them to sit down and shut up.

Ino tries her best to keep the squad polished but it doesn’t work so well when they’re younger lmao. When they’re older tho…. most fabulous and on point squad out there. your other faves could never.

kiba the leather jacket wearing hottie, ino ‘every outfit i wear has been on point since age 12’ yamanaka, choji who is canonically referred to as the most handsome chubby guy in the leaf (insane statement but still), shikamaru who somehow serves while wearing the standard chunin uniform, shino’s mysteriousness inherently makes him hot, and hinata with her silky hyuuga hair and flawless skin

their formations are tight, their teamwork is seamless, their communication is solid, and they look good while doing it all. ibiki is in a corner crying. he wants them to come work for him so bad.

[malereadermaniac]

So clean you could eat off-a me ~ Kaito Momota x Male Reader

Your bf has just gotten out of the shower word count: 1.4k Cw: food play and armpits Brief Nsfw / MDNI ~ amab m!reader / FDNI

Lazy Sundays were the best

What made them especially good was the fact that not only was every one of your Sundays lazy, but you got to spend each one with your stupidly hot and cute boyfriend

Kaito and you had lived together for ages now, he improved your daily life by impossible amounts

The purple haired man made you exercise with him, enticing you with the promise of letting you lay under him as he does his push ups

He's quite the cook too - nothing mega fancy, but he's encouraged you to eat healthier food, anythings better than instant noodles constantly

He also looks so sexy cooking for you, he's such a gentleman

Kaito might not seem like a gentleman but he really is one, always making sure you're comfortable and always thinking of you, always putting you before himself

But that didn't mean Kaito wasn't a total idiot, like a fucking goof

Not only was your attractive, lovable boyfriend a little dumb sometimes but he did stupid shit and said stupid shit in the funniest and best possible way

Taking us to the current situation you were in

The hiss of your shared shower could be heard in the background as you laid on your bed playing some random game on your switch

You had already showered, comfortably lying on your bed in some loose, warm clothes - the kind Kaito likes to see you in

You hear the shower stop and listen to the sound of your boyfriend hum some random song

A couple minuets later, your lanky yet muscular boyfriend walks out of the bathroom, steam escaping into your bedroom

He looks fucking Godly, his hair damp and dark, hanging down his forehead

A steaming white towel wrapped around his wide, somehow muscular waist

Yet no matter how thick the towel was, when it came to Kaito, a faint dick-print could always be seen

Kaito was cleanly shaved, his chest and abs, even his arms smoother than butter

The only visible hair on your boyfriend's body was his suggestive happy train - yes, the curtains match the drapes

But when Kaito puts his arms behind his head, he reveals his unshaved pits, a dark purple hue adorning his smooth hair

"Heh- like what you see, sweetcheeks?" Kaito flirts, a smug grin on his face

"Eh I guess so" you tease your hunk of a boyfriend

"Oi!" His face drops into exaggerated upset

You giggle at your boyfriends antics as he lays down next to you, his arms still behind his head

Showing off his gorgeous body, muscular yet lean - his shoulders broad and his pecs plushy

" 'm so clean you could eat off-a me!" He teases, clearly trying to get it on with you in his creative and goofy ways

"Well I'm not going to do that." You firmly say, not even batting an eye to your boyfriend, still focused on your game

In reality, you'd jump on Kaito and eat a 3 course meal off of his body if you could

But you like to seize every possible opportunity of teasing of annoying your lovable boyfriend

"I'm just sayin' ya could!" Kaito continues, leaning his arm on your head, his hairy pit pushing against your face

You decide to indulge your boyfriend, only a little though

You turn off your switch and turn on your stomach to look at Kaito, your head resting on his muscular ribs, his armpit practically in your face

"Well, I'm not going to" you say with a cheeky smile, your hand gently moving to your boyfriend's abs and stroking up and down his torso

"FINE!" Kaito feigns offence, moving his arm down from behind his head

His very muscular arm wrapping around your neck, pushing your head ever so close to his hairy pits, your face plush against your boyfriend's built body

Your hand rests on Kaito's abs as you playfully fight against his grip on you

Kaito moves his hand down to your waist so you take your chance and roll over to sit on his lap

Kaito's eyes widen as he stays lying on your bed while your ass comes into contact with his covered cock

"Fuck baby you're too hot" he mumbles, one of his veiny hands on your fully clothed waist and the other on your ass

Your hands on his naked pecs hold you up, the smile on your face horny yet playful

And as Kaito tries to grind up into you, you hop off of your boyfriend and walk towards the door

"Ah- you're such a tease" Kaito says, a pout on his face as he sulks on the bed

Your chuckle can be heard fading away throughout the house

A little time passes, Kaito doesn't move from the bed, too lazy to change from the now wet towel into real clothes

You walk back into the room to your dumbass boyfriend still sulking on the bed with his arms crossed, unconsciously flexing his crazy muscular arms

His head perks up once he noticed you, and Kaito's face breaks out into a smile once he noticed the can of whipped cream in your hand

He knew immediately what it was for

"Let's test out that theory shall we - if you do say you're soooo clean~" you tease

Cut to now, your almost fully nude body on top of Kaito's, the wet towel still around his waist as you grind your underwear-covered ass against your boyfriend's now fully hard dick

You shake the can of whipped cream in a very sexual manner as Kaito smirks at your actions

You giggle as your boyfriend puts his arms behind his head, laying back and relaxing as he gives you as much surface area as possible to work with

Not even 5 seconds pass before you're squirting the sugary, white cream on your boyfriend

Making a trail up from Kaito's 6-pack, up his pecks, his bushy armpits and finally his collar bone

You toss the can behind you onto the floor and immediately go crazy on your boyfriend

You bend over, still dry humping Kaito's crotch, and start to lap at the cream on your boyfriend's abs

"Hah fuck...!" Kaito sighs in pleasure as you lick up his abs, your hand gently trailing up his waist while your tongue tickles his hard, muscular stomach

Kaito's whole body twitches when you reach his pecs, your mouth licking st your boyfriend's hard nipple while your hand works his other pec

"Jesus fuck (y/n) you're so hot" he groans, slightly grinding up into your covered ass

You giggle and blush at your boyfriend's compliments, moving up to his mouth to steal a short yet passionate kiss before going back down to his chest

You follow the trail of sweet cream up Kaito's left pec to his armpit, lapping at the dollop of white cream, his clean, freshly washed pits actually tasting pleasant for once

You move over to Kaito's other, whipped-cream-free armpit but as you go to lick it a chuckle erupts from Kaito's throat

"Haha! That one has no cream on it, sweetheart. D'you just like my pits that much?" Kaito teases you, showing you a toothy grin

You sit up and look down at your muscular boyfriend

As you slowly grind down on his crotch, you moan softly and whine

"I can't help it, Kaitooo~ I just love you so much, you're soooo hot~" you whine, grinding down on your boyfriend's crotch, looking into his eyes with half-lidded ones

You'd never seen your boyfriend sport a blush so quickly

As Kaito tries to stutter out a witty reply, you bend back down to his clean pit, lapping at his dark purple hair, feeling the ridges of his muscles with your tongue

You finally make it to his collarbone, cleaning the now melted cream off of him with your tongue

Once your boyfriend was all clean, you marked his neck with hickeys, kissing his neck as if it were his lips

"Oi... c'mon give my mouth the same treatment" he mumbles through grunts of pleasure

So you find it within yourself to be charitable, taking pity on your horny boyfriend and crashing your lips against his

Kaito moves his veiny, rough hands from behind his head to your face and wait

He guides your hips against his dick as he gently kisses you, his warm tongue dancing with yours

You whimper into his mouth and Kaito devours your sexy sounds, rubbing his hand up and down your waist

In an attempt to say "good boy, you're so good to me"

Fuck he loved you so much

And you sure did love him too

[cowgurrrl]

Please Come Home for Christmas

Pairing: rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader

Summary: The Christmas season with the Millers [1.4k]

Author’s note: I got a wave of Christmas nostalgia and said fuck it we ball

Warnings: age roll call (Sam: 8, Issac: 6, twins & Lucy : 4, JJ: 1, Sarah: 32, Ellie: 28) mentions of aging animals, pregnancy/babies, Joel not only being a DILF but a GFILF (grandfather I’d like to fuck), reminiscing, NOTE: While Christmas and Christmas themes are prevalent in this fic, readers religious views are not specified and very easily can be added in!!

The house is chaos. Lucia and Tommy are in the kitchen, loudly speaking Spanish to each other over Tejano Christmas music while the kids run around under their feet. Hank warns them about "gettin' in Abuela's way when she's cookin'" and escorts them to the backyard with a quick kiss to his wife's cheek. The tree is sparkling in the corner, cramping the otherwise large living room with the messy handmade ornaments of a well-lived childhood hanging from the branches. You could spot Joel's toothy kindergarten photo from across the room if you tried. Maria opens the back door, wine in one hand and a half-made Christmas garland in the other, to yell at the kids for roughhousing too hard and earning an apologetic wave from Hank. 

You sit on the couch with Maria and work on stringing popcorn and cranberries on a long piece of fishing wire. She sighs when she sits back down, and you struggle to remember what you were talking about when Daisy suddenly steals a piece of popcorn from the bowl and runs away. "Daisy Mae!" You scold, but when her big, droopy eyes meet yours, she knows you're not really mad. The years have flown by, and the sweet puppy who showed up at your door one day now has white on her face and struggles to keep up with the kids when they want to play. She can have as much popcorn as she wants as long as Joel doesn't know about it. 

"God, do babies always smell bad or just mine?" Ellie asks as she walks into the living room with a squirmy JJ. He turned one a few months ago, and now all he wants to do is run around with the big kids. You open your arms, and Ellie hands over said smelly baby without hesitation.

"They smell bad for a little bit, but then it gets better." You say in an obnoxious baby voice as you smile big at the baby. 

"I told you!" Dina announces as she taps Ellie's hip to get by her to throw away a dirty diaper. You can hear her asking Lucia and Tommy if they need help, which they vehemently deny before shoving her out of the kitchen. "They run that kitchen like the goddamn Navy." She says upon reentry, and you laugh.

"Trust me, I've been trying to infiltrate for years now, and they haven't let me."

"Guests don't cook!" Tommy calls from the kitchen, and you roll your eyes. The backdoor slides open again, and you expect one kid or another to be crying from a fall or a bending of the rules, but you find Sarah and Ethan coming back inside. Well, you see Sarah's belly before you really see her. She, like Ellie, is wearing a red sweater, and her curls are half-up in a green bow. She's glowing. 

"I'm ready to be done with this pregnancy. This is bullshit," She breathes as Ethan helps support her into Hank's big Lazy Boy. Her hands rest on her bump, and she looks at you. "I don't know how you did this so many times." 

"I've only been pregnant twice, remember?"

"Oh, right. Twins," her eyes widen as she looks at Ethan. "We are not having twins. We're done."

"Yes, ma'am." He says diligently before kissing her forehead and asking Lucia for entry into the kitchen in Spanish. She greets him with loud kisses on both cheeks and gives him a glass of water for his heavily pregnant wife. You always knew you liked Ethan, but seeing him be such an attentive dad and husband only solidifies it for you.

"I remember how miserable I got at the end with JJ, too. Hopefully, you'll go into labor sooner rather than later." Dina sympathizes, and Sarah pokes at her belly.

"D'you hear that? People other than me want you out, you little terrorist."

"Honey, please don't call our daughter a terrorist."

"When she's the one sitting on your bladder, you can call her whatever you want."

"Daddy's home!" Your eight-year-old sprints through the living room with a posse of children behind him. Issac can keep pace with his long legs, but the girls— Lucy, Sophia, and Violet— struggle with their little, four-year-old strides. Poor JJ is left in the dust and gives you the saddest face ever as his cousins run past. Dina coos and takes JJ to soothe him and give him a chance to get in on the action as Joel trudges over the threshold with a gaggle of children and H-E-B bags slung over both arms.

"Little help?" He calls as he enters the living room. Everyone starts getting up from the couch to help unload the groceries, but Joel lifts a grocery-clad hand before Sarah can move a muscle. "Not you, mama. You rest." 

"Thank you." She says, and he hums, kisses her head, and elbows his way into the kitchen. One by one, you unload the groceries from the bed of Hank's truck and into their respective places around the house. Sam and Issac run away with an impressively large slab of brisket to give to Hank, and all three of the girls get distracted by the large metal tins of Christmas popcorn, complete with images of Santa wearing a cowboy hat on the side. 

It's chaos, but it's perfect chaos. Festive music and sweet smells float around the house as the sun sets on a chilly December Texas day. The lights around the house and on the tree cast the rooms in a comforting red, green, and white glow. You catch the kids laughing and whispering to each other as Tommy and Lucia dance together between stirring, patting, and baking. Dina and Ellie guide JJ around the house, helping him strengthen his wobbly legs and letting him feel involved. Ethan steals snacks from the pantry and brings them to Sarah's throne of a chair. You think he'd bring the world to her if she asked for it in this moment. Hank is in the backyard and bounces between showing the boys how the barbeque works and how to make the cows moo back. 

You're smiling at the insanity when Joel jerks his head toward the front door. "Got one last thing in the truck I need help with," he supplies. You figure it's something from Santa or something he didn't want the kids to see and get excited about. So, you agree and follow him out into the orange dusk and shiver a little at the sudden temperature change. You get all the way to the driver's side of the old pickup when he looks up at the tree he parked under, making you look up, too. You can't stop the laugh from leaving you at what you find. Hung above the truck in a tree older than Joel is a tiny sprig of mistletoe tied with nimble guitarist fingers. 

"When did you even have time to hang that?" You ask, and he shrugs.

"Anythin' is possible with Christmas magic." He snarks. You laugh and step into him, looking between him and the mistletoe as his cologne wraps around you.

"You're cheesy," you say. "And also stupidly romantic." 

"Yeah, yeah." He says as he leans down to kiss you. His beard scratches your face, but he makes up for it in the sweet way he holds you. He's warm and firm and so fucking perfect it makes you wish you could freeze this moment forever. He mumbles a quiet "I love you" and presses kisses all over your face like he's worried the spell will break if his lips leave you. 

Ten years ago, you got married on this same property. Eight years ago, you brought your son here for his first Christmas, and then four years later, your daughters. Your grandchildren have also spent their first holiday seasons here (Lucia was more than willing to buy a menorah and learn about Hannukah for Dina the second she found out she didn't celebrate Christmas). Every Christmas, you've brought Daisy and watched her run in the backyard. Then walk. Then lay down in front of the door, sighing like an old man. You know, perhaps someday soon, you'll have your first Christmas since your twenties without her. Someday, the kids will have their own traditions and families. Someday, Lucia and Hank won't have the energy to host the entire Miller-Hernandez-Caradonna clan for holidays. But that's someday. Right now, you're kissing Joel under an old tree with fairy lights and mistletoe strung throughout its branches, and the air is cold and full of nostalgia, and it's chaos. It's perfect. Until a distant cow moos loud enough for it to reach you all the way in the front yard and makes Joel pull away from you with an astounded look on his face.

"Was that fucking Roger?"

TAGLIST: @abbyhaslongshorts @kiwiharrykiwi @sumsworldz @myloveistoolittle @anavatazes @marantha

[thegreymoon]

The Story of Minglan

LMAO, granny is a queen!

Granny is the smartest person in this house and will not be so easily manipulated 🤣🤣

Molan really screwed herself here in a multitude of ways by setting up her sisters for punishment.

***

Aww, these babies 🤗

***

God, he's cute, but then he also comes out and says things like that and I can't decide whether or not to smack him.

I am on Manniang's side here. Poor woman.

Imagine your husband, for whom you risked your life and bore him two children, having this conversation right in front of you and you having to enthusiastically agree that yes, you don't mind if he marries another woman whom he'll place above you 🙄🙄

Murder. Murder for all of them.

***

So, find someone who is weak and easily manipulated because no self-respecting woman with any choice in the matter will agree to this.

Disgusted by everything going on here.

***

Again. I realize she has no choices here if she wants to live and her kids to eat, but jfc.

Team Manniang here. All men and their enablers can rot.

***

Ha! Three cheers for TGCF and Sanlang too! 😄

***

LMAO, I love him 🤣🤣

He's a dog, but he's cute and has the game down pat!

***

Aww, they are stupid cute, no doubt about it 🤗

***

LMAO, I love that he had to come and beg his first wife for this bs anyway 🤣🤣

Make him squirm, Big Madam! Make him pay!!!!!!!

***

I am cackling 🤣🤣

The biggest punishment for Molan, though, will be the fact that they are pulling her out of the academy. I know she is mean and awful, but she is the definition of wasted potential. If she had been born in another age, she could have been great.

***

LOL, what is her fucking endgame?

THERE IS NO CHANCE THAT SHE WITH ALL HER "EXPERIENCE" DOES NOT KNOW WHAT POLITICS ARE GOING ON BEHIND THE SCENES HERE.

***

Murder, Big Madam!

I keep telling you, you must resort to killing them all! Swallowing your resentment like this for years, you will only end up with an ulcer.

***

The irony of someone illiterate being an authority in education 🙄

Hell society.

***

LMAO, she is so lazy, but it is kicking her two brain cells into gear to figure out how to work less and be pampered more in the future 🤣

***

LMAO, love the aunt 🤣🤣

She's insane, but she has the spirit! Also, considering how many times I've begged people on this show to start resorting to poison, I can see her point!

***

Xiaodie? 💚💚

I'm so glad we get to find our what happened to her!

***

Poisons, lady.

Teach them to brew poisons. Nothing will cultivate their disposition better than getting rid of a shit husband. Or an overbearing mother-in-law. Or the fifth concubine he brings into your house.

***

Oh, shut up.

I am always inclined to be on her side because I love this actress and this entire system is bs, but she's just so unpleasant. She will be her own downfall because she will burn all bridges and have no one in her corner when she needs it.

[astridthevalkyrie]

to add to that last ask, portia featherington is a beloved character despite the fact that she: encouraged marina to trick colin, manipulated her by forging the letter from george (because before that marina was NOT planning on pursuing colin like that), fearmongered her and made sure marina didn't stay unmarried despite her wanting to, slapped her after finding out she was pregnant (marina was a teenage girl!), and is generally emotionally abusive to all her daughters especially penelope and everyone says it's okay because she loves her kids!

so we have our answer, if marina was white, i think everyone would love her. because portia is like 70% of the reason marina did what she did. and sure, she has somewhat of a redemption arc in season 3, but people loved her even before that. and that's not to say i don't find her entertaining. she's funny, she delivers lines well, she's the worst and it makes for enjoyable scenes. but i do give more grace to the pregnant black teenager than to the middle aged white woman for "protecting her kids." in quotes because even if portia did see herself in pen, her treatment of pen is in no way protective or loving and flipping it around once she sees that colin genuinely loves her seems incredibly insincere.

also this isn't unique to bridgerton. you remember when the little mermaid live action came out? even going past the absolute vileness and vitriol that halle bailey faced leading up to the release you remember how when it came out? and everyone and their mothers LOVED vanessa? vanessa who had no lines? vanessa whose singing voice was halle bailey and whose speaking voice was melissa mccarthy? the white actress who just had to spin around for a minute and make a very evil expression? and people said she stole the movie? and you can't say it's racism because people will be like "omg so just liking a white actress/character is racist???" no. and you know that's not it. it's that you would go out of your way to put such heavy praise onto a white actress that did absolutely nothing special aside from being a pretty white girl when it was halle who made the movie and even that scene with her acting and her voice.

remember how in ginny and georgia people are absolutely insane and disgusting when it comes to ginny a young mixed girl but praise abby the mean and edgy white girl and go so far as to call her a victim? and sure some of it just comes from a concerning lack of recalling media but it's also just this unsaid perhaps unconscious dislike people have of black characters (and all characters of color but especially black characters). it's the fact that many writers write them to be disliked. and people fall for it, take the bait, hook line and sinker.

and it's in little doses. god i just. people can think i'm reaching at straws all they want but lucas in stranger things. how in the first season he's MADE to be disliked despite being in the right. kenny in cobra kai who is humiliated again and again in show and we're supposed to dislike him or maybe just laugh at him. whatever the fuck is happening in that shameless scene where fiona fires the only black employee that works for her. i haven't seen shameless but that scene unfortunately comes up on my feed once every few months and each time i hate it more. because people will say "b-b-b-but that lady was a bad employee! she was lazy and coming to work late and then playing the race card!" yes! precisely! why did the writers write a scene like that? why did they play into such a negative stereotype just to give their woe-is-me white woman a #badbitch moment? the sinister thrill that people get from seeing black characters and especially black women "get what's coming to them" is so concerning!

how people talk about jacinda in the last season of once upon a time and say henry had more chemistry with ivy. no the fuck he did NOT. if jacinda was white and ivy was black, that would not be such a popular opinion. and it does get trickier when it comes to shipping because sure, everyone likes different things in fiction. i haven't seen star wars so take the following with a grain of salt but yeah sure people will like rey x kylo more than rey x finn. her dynamic with kylo is probably more interesting. but WHY is it more interesting. why could the writers not make her relationship with finn more engaging if he was supposed to be her love interest? would more people not be calling reylo toxic if kylo was played by a black actor? would more people not be saying that rey is a lesbian if she was played by a black woman? that is to say, i am in no way saying that people who ship reylo are racist. i think there are very few people who actively had the thought "i'm not going to ship rey with finn because finn is black." however i think there is a combination of a, writers not wanting to make black characters outright evil because they'll be called racist so they just sneak in ways to make them either annoying or boring, and b, fandom either ignoring or actively disliking black characters whether the writers do it or not. again, haven't seen star wars, but i can also talk about how lucas and max from stranger things are now more popular post season 4 when they were given better scenes, but how before that everyone shipped max with eleven.

or what about the mess of a movie that is set it up. where the two bad characters are the ceo guy who is portrayed as angry and aggressive and cheating on his girlfriend, and the main character's girlfriend, who is portrayed as vain and selfish.

the only beloved black character from a POPULAR fandom (because there are beloved and well-written black and other poc characters in smaller fandoms) that i can think of off the top of my head is jesper from six of crows. he's a MAIN character, first of all, and he is clearly written to be liked. the show and book make him the charmer, the funny one, gives him an actual plotline and secrets and family and angst and engagement just like all the other characters in the story. perhaps characters like t'challa in marvel could be considered popular. but on ao3, out of 500k marvel fics, 10k have him tagged as a character. whereas in 10k fics for six of crows, jesper is tagged in 6k and him x wylan is the second most popular ship.

idek where i'm going with this. i'm not trying to be mean. it's fine and valid to say that someone wouldn't like a character if they're white. i think it's also valid for me to say that black characters are villainized or ignored by writers and fandoms alike in a way white characters aren't, and that sometimes it's very obvious.

[doodlegirl1998]

No one talked or wants to talk about it is how Tenko had more good stuff than Izu. I'm talking about his two faceless friends when Tenchan was a cute baby. No they aren't important and granted Hori can't bakugoufied them any minute

My point is so far

Compared to Izuku's childhood...Tenko was better. He had a lovely corgi,his big sis loved him and he had friends.

"but Kotaro" yes Hori is a coward to go to the laziest option but even so...Tenko the soon to be Le villain had a better childhood than the mc (not forgetting his pain here but it's not as if he was abused 24/7. Hori went to a coward route but we only see one bad day on Kotaro. To be clear not excuse the abuse just saying Tenko had people on his side even if it wasn't perfect)

Now compared to Izuku's past and ....wow.

Izu doesn't have good friends

Never had a fluffy corgi (bk would have killed I know he would)

His mom is just existing.

And he is stuck with his abuser (in the begin Izu didn't had a good view on bk which hori couldn't let stand)

It's just...Izu had a sad backstory but no one gives a shit. Is it sadder than shig? The point it's not this... The point is how the mc has a bad childhood and his villain had a decent one (again I KNOW IT WASNT PERFECT)

Hi @mikeellee 👋,

You do have a good point here, while Tenko had an abusive father in Kotaro (which Hori went super lazy with making him abusive and failed to expand on his abuse), in his childhood he's shown to have more good things in his life than Izuku has had.

Tenko had in his backstory prior to the accident:

A good pet in Mon-chan

A big sister who loved him (although I am mixed on Hana, her lying to save herself from Kotaro as another part of her main appearance doesn't do her any favours. Although that sits more on Kotaro making his daughter that afraid of him.)

A mum and Grandparents who loved him** (although they too are not without fault, they should have acted sooner to stand up to Kotaro but no one can deny they loved Tenko.)

And his two faceless nameless friends who seemed nice from what little we are told.

Whereas Izu in his backstory;

Has never had any pet to our knowledge.

Has no cool big brother or sister.

His Dad is MIA ( apparently abroad working but he's never shown to call Izuku or come home.)

He has no sweet loving grandparents from his mum or dads side.

His Mum* doesn't stand up for him and cries on him about his being born quirkless.

Izuku is never shown to have any friend prior to U.A.

Izuku is chronically bullied (abused) from the ages of 4 - 14 by Bakugou and his cronies. (I'd argue this is actually still ongoing in UA the tone in the narrative has just shifted to be more in Bkg's favour now than Izu's.) And Izuku is still STUCK with Bakugou as a member of the 'wonder duo'... (that whole concept can fuck right off.)

So Shig, other than Kotaro being an abusive POS, actually had more nice things in his backstory than Izu did whereas Izu's backstory (prior to meeting All Might) is just PAIN.

*- it could be argued that Inko is a good thing in Izuku's backstory and while I'm not denying she loves him I'm saying that in their relationship is not all that great... He has to comfort her a lot of the time she's on screen and Hori never shows Inko confronting Aldera or the Bakugou's about her son's bullying. So she's failing as a parent there.

** - While Nao and her parents are actually shown standing up to Kotaro which is leaps and bounds ahead of anything Inko is shown to do for Izu (sorry it's true.)

[lesbiangummybearmafia]

The Gilded Age, 02x05 Close Enough to Touch, my thoughts...

Omg I'm so happy for Aunt Ada! It was brilliant she didn't allow her fears to stop her marring the Reverend Forte. Their so sweet together. I understand that Aunt Agnes had to marry that man she did and as result had a horrible marriage but I'm glad the Reverend Forte pointed out to her that it was for her own selfish reasons she didn't want Ada to marry him and not because she was trying to protect Ada. I'm also glad Aunt Agnes got her head out of her butt and went to the wedding! Because no matter what she said under the grumpy exterior I want to believe she actually happy for her little sister. Now I want them to find a man for Aunt Agnes, wouldn't that be amazing to see!

Ok I completely annoyed by the whole Peggy and her boss thing. How played out, over done, so predictable and well just lazy is that?! Why can't they make her character smarter than that. Be all like oh hell no fool, you're married. Yes we had a scary fucking moment back there but no we don't need to be kissing or anything else. Because it makes Peggy's character come off as less than she is, less intelligent, less brilliant. It does such a deserves to her character!

But Bertha's staff was so not on our watch mf! I freakin love them. Especially Church making sure the Duke didn't end up with a lap full of hot soup. And Watson for catching on to what was going on in the first place! Bertha needs to give them and Mrs. Bruce a rise!

Oh I loved, loved watching Turner's plan at revenge go up in smoke. Omg Mrs. Fish comments perfectly just hitting Turner's last nerve lmfao!! God their making me truly hate her.

Bertha's dinner party gown was so beautiful. I do like seeing all the lighter colors this season and flower prints. I thought Bertha was rather cute when she kept checking to make sure everything for the dinner was perfect and all her staff kept reassuring her. I would like to see more moments like that where she's well cute. When Gladys tried to walk further down the talk, Bertha all come back here you lol. I so knew one of the main reason Bertha wanted to meet the Duke was because of Gladys. If she gets her way Gladys is going become a Duchess. It was great Bertha and George are not longer fighting omg. I didn't realize how heavy that made the show until the episode. Even with the events with Peggy unfortunately the episode still feel lighter.

Oscar and Maude Beaton are very sweet together but I don't want to see Maude get hurt. If Oscar actually loves her, perhaps like one loves a very dear friend or a best friend than maybe it's alright but if not. He definitely needs to stop acting like any kind of goldigger though! I just really want him to have honest feelings for Maude is all.

Marian if she doesn't want to be with Dashiell Montgomery ok. But her doing cringie face everytime he said something in that direction is getting old and annoying. Could she please grow the same spine for herself she seems to have for everyone else.

It's so awesome they put in about Emily Warren Roebling the first female engineer. That whole thing Larry finds out is completely ture part of history. I really appreciate the show added. It's important that our women's history finally be included.

[artikgato]

Long post about Dragon Ball ahead!

Today I went to an actual movie theater and watched a screening of the first three episodes of the English dub of Daima. It was a lot of fun! And very nostalgic. Spoilers and reminiscing under the cut.

I was around when Dragon Ball Z was airing on Toonami back in the day. I didn't have regular access to cable so I didn't get to see any of it as it actually aired. I didn't watch the Saiyan or Namek stuff at all until much later, borrowing some friends' DVDs. I did, however, catch reruns of the Trunks - Androids - Cell sagas in the summer of 2001. That summer I was staying with relatives who did have cable. I was enthralled; I don't think I missed a single episode. I was actually pretty bummed when I had to go back to not having cable in the fall, because I knew they were going to be airing the Buu arc (it was very heavily advertised, and was probably the reason they were rerunning the Cell stuff in the first place). After that summer, though, I was hooked. I used chore money to buy some of the movies on VHS (Lord Slug and Cooler's Revenge for sure, kinda wish I still had them) and a substantial amount of the Buu saga either on VHS or DVD when VHS got phased out. So, even though it was not nearly as well written or paced as the earlier parts of DBZ, the Buu arc holds a very special place in my heart. It was what I watched through high school. (I was also the same age as Gohan, so that was fun.)

So, Daima taking place shortly(?) after the end of the Buu arc hit me in the nostalgia in a way I wasn't really expecting. I went into this knowing very little other than everybody got turned into little kids for Reasons, and the animation is very pretty. I assumed it was going to take place during or post-Super, because why wouldn't it? So, seeing that familiar cast of characters and hearing those familiar dub performances sent me straight back to my high school days (which was over 20 years ago now, get off my lawn, etc.), spending lazy Saturday afternoons watching any episodes I could get copies of on my old ass, tiny ass CRT TV. (I watched a lot of anime that way.)

Also within the first ten, fifteen minutes of episode 1 I was slapped (metaphorically) with a reminder that I had an embarrassingly big crush on this little nerd back in the day:

(did I choose the least flattering possible picture of Shin? Yes.)

To be fair (or maybe unfair) to me, I was Weird with a capital W back in high school. I had female friends who also watched DBZ. They all had sensible taste in men: Future Trunks (I mean, yeah, of course), Vegeta, high school age Gohan, Goku, even Android 17. I was the one going "okay but Piccolo is kinda hot, right?" to which they replied "the green slug man??" So I'm in high schooI and watching the Buu arc and this purple-skinned, perpetually anxious loser nerd shows up and I go "Oh??? Sign me the fuck up." And then 20 years later (I'll admit, I did not watch Super. I guess I need to fix that) I'm watching this and then I go "oh, right, Shin is hot, I forgot."

This had been, of course, after staring at his younger brother Degesu for like 10 minutes during the intro of episode 1 and going "oh no he's hot oh no he's hot oh no he's hot". And then also his sister Dr. Arinsu (not sure if she's the eldest sibling or younger than Shin) and going "oh no she's hot too oh no she's hot too" and etc. etc. But I mean, come on, can you blame me? (You can. You should, you should judge me for my weird taste. I'm not going to call it poor taste, because you know I'm right.) I mean, look at them:

(High school me would not have been going "oh no she's hot". I've come a long way.)

But, okay, y'all didn't come here for my apparent bias towards characters from the demon realm (oh, right, it turns out that Shin's people are from the demon realm and are actually demons and not gods. And Namekians are also from the demon realm and are not just alien slug men. Actually everybody with pointy ears is from the demon realm or has an ancestor from the demon realm. Go figure.).

Anyway, I've only watched the first three episodes, but so far it is really good! The action sequences were very well choreographed and animated (the fight with the burgers was SO GOOD THOUGH), the dub voice acting was stellar, and seeing all the main cast turned into kids was phenomenally entertaining. This is what GT should have been. I'll never get over realizing I was looking at a like 12 year old Master Roshi, who continued to speak like an old geezer even with the voice of a 12 year old. 10/10. (Also he has to be related to Krillin, the resemblance is uncanny.) Angery little kid Vegeta was amazing. Teenage-ish Piccolo was great, too, because we got to see him as a little kid in Dragon Ball and as an adult in DBZ, but never in this inbetween teenage stage. I wish we'd gotten to see more of the more secondary and tertiary characters, maybe that'll be in later episodes. Normally I would hate this, but it was hilarious. In GT it was just weird and off-putting to only have Goku as a little kid, but with everyone else as kids he just fits right in.

I'm definitely going to track down episodes 4 and up (I think Japan is up to 6 this week?) and keep watching. I don't think I can patiently wait for the dub like I did for the first three, so subbed it is for now. I don't typically watch DBZ in Japanese because I grew up with the dub, but I'm too interested to see where this plot is going. (And if they're going to give Degesu and Arinsu more screen time. Shin's already getting a lot, which I am very happy about.) I'm also very interested to see if anybody else got turned into a kid. Like Gohan. Are we getting Cell Games age Gohan? I hope so. But also, what other characters were included in that wish? Tien and Chaotzu? Launch? Android 17? Yajirobe? Videl? Ox King was kid-ified, but Korin wasn't. I need answers. Also we were robbed, Korin should have been a kitten.

Also also, I think they should have kept the kids who were already kids the same age they already were. Imagine little kid Vegeta being physically the same age as kid Trunks. Imagine it. I fully get why they just turned them into babies, but imagine.

[fictionkinfessions]

Grrr English should not be my native language, I *hate* this. The most undignified language I have ever had as my mother tongue, honestly. Even the ones where source content seems to show me speaking English, that was not the case in far more of them than you'd imagine (would you guess that MCU!Loki, shock horror, didn't actually grow up speaking modern English? Yeah, I'm pretty sure I was at least a thousand years old by the time canon events started and while we kept up-to-date on Midgard languages, English was not the language I learned first! My native tongue doesn't exist in this world because Marvel is fucking lazy, it was influenced by old Norse but they were not the same language), and even when it was, I was bilingual from a young age, something I wasn't given the chance to be here (the court bard practically raised me when I was Jaskier, he'd toss me books he had on the Elven language and tell me to come back to him when I could say some esoteric phrase perfectly and explain what it meant with all the proper nuances in my own words because he had Other Shit To Do and they were useless to him, so I learned Elven pretty young). (And I'm sure some people will be very amused to learn that yes, in fact, at least in one instance, Loki and Jaskier are the same person)

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