#yes i should have cosplayed him from the beginning

[misc-obeyme]

Well okay. One whole person stated they would like to see the pegging version of catboy Satan so here it is.

I see you, @cactusmisslittle. I hope it’s okay that I tagged you, but your tags here are the only reason this version exists lol.

An important note! I've been calling this pegging because that's how I've been thinking about it, but I also wanted to keep things gender neutral if possible. I don't know if I succeeded, but to that end, I've used the word "cock" in place of "strap." So if you're imagining a strap, let's just say you call it your cock, okay? I don't know, I couldn't come up with a better way to go about it.

Oh yeah and one more thing - I didn't talk about the putting on of a strap, either, but it would happen when MC is taking off their clothes. Tantan is being patient and waiting for them lol.

The beginning part is all the same, with Satan dropping hints and MC walking into their room to find him. The only part that's changed is the actual sex. Once again, I apologize for low quality, I'm still getting into the swing of writing again.

GN!MC x Satan

NSFW MDNI

Warnings: soft dom!MC, cat collar with bell & cat ears, praising, use of Tantan as a nickname, still a lil bit of biting, penetration (Satan receiving, could be read as pegging hopefully)

It might be difficult to tell from an outside perspective, but you knew that Satan was soft for you. The way he trusted you entirely with his feelings, even his anger, let you know that he was perhaps more comfortable with you than anyone else.

So it wasn't entirely a surprise when you started to pick up on some little hints of something he didn't seem to have worked up the courage to ask you directly.

You weren't sure what was happening right away. It started one day when he showed you a collection of cat collars that were for sale online. He scrolled through the pictures on his phone, finally stopping on one with a little bell.

"This one is especially cute, don't you think?" he asked.

You smiled indulgently. "Yeah it is. Are you going to get it for one of the strays in the garden?"

Satan blinked as if he was surprised by this suggestion. He looked at you and the confusion in his eyes was clear. Then you watched as a deep blush spread across his face. "R-right," he said. "Yes."

He immediately changed the subject, but you couldn't stop thinking about his reaction. Like maybe the two of you had been talking about different things.

You puzzled over this for a little while, a suspicion starting to form in the back of your mind.

Confirmation came in the form of a cosplay catalog that Levi left in the common room. The cover featured an anime character wearing cat ears and a collar.

Satan picked up the catalog and you could tell that he had known it was there. "Levi must have left this here," he said. He showed it to you. "Wh-what do you think?"

You looked at the cover. "Hmm," you said. "I like the cat ears. The collar should have a bell, though."

You watched in satisfaction as Satan's face flushed so hard and fast you thought steam might come out of his ears.

After that, you knew what you had to do.

You were careful about your purchase. You made sure it was obtained discreetly.

The collar itself was thick and black with a large silver buckle and a round silver bell. You had chosen black cat ears to match. You left them on Satan's bed with a note that said, Is this what you had in mind? MC.

And then you waited.

The next time you saw Satan was at breakfast. He sat across the table from you and met your eyes directly. He held your gaze for a moment too long before looking away. Nobody else seemed to notice and he acted completely normal the rest of the day.

You had no other indication of his reaction to your gift. For days, you waited for him to do something or say something. Was he upset? He wasn't acting angry.

And then one day you walked into your room and nearly died on the spot. As soon as you recovered, you closed the door and made sure it was locked. And that's when you remembered that everyone else was out of the house today. Was that what Satan had been waiting for?

You turned back to your bed to take in the sight of him.

There he sat, on his knees, with his hands pressed onto the bed between them. The collar was clasped perfectly around his neck, the bell and buckle shining. The cat ears were nestled in his hair, their black tufts a nice contrast to his bright blond. He was frowning, his eyes were closed, his face flushed, and he wore absolutely nothing else.

You slowly approached him, watching him as he stayed still. When you got to the edge of the bed, you stopped. You cupped his cheek, tilting his head to look up at you, even though his eyes stayed closed.

"Look at you," you said softly. "What a beautiful boy you are."

Satan's blush deepened, but he opened his eyes. You saw desire and pleasure and nervousness and embarrassment tumbling through the shades of green.

You brought up your other hand and held his face. "Don't be embarrassed. You look amazing."

The frown eased just a little. "I didn't think you would actually want to do this."

Your eyes widened in surprise. "What? Why would you think that?"

Satan looked away from you. "It doesn't… make you uncomfortable?"

You rested your hands on his shoulders and kissed his forehead. "No. It makes me horny as fuck. And I can see what it's doing to you, too."

You looked down deliberately where Satan's cock had been steadily growing as soon as you got close.

Satan buried his face in his hands, causing the bell around his neck to jingle slightly.

"No, no, no," you said softly, pulling his hands away. He opened his mouth like he was going to protest, but you cut him off with a kiss.

Satan responded to you instantly, opening his mouth for you. As your tongues entwined, you let go of one of his wrists to reach up and grab the collar. You used it to pull his head back, giving you easier access to his mouth as his hand now tugged on the edge of your shirt.

You pulled away to kiss the wrist of the hand you still held, trailing your lips down his arm and up his shoulder. He was breathing heavily as you traced your tongue along the edge of skin where the collar stopped, ringing the bell playfully with your fingers.

Satan moaned, his tugs on your shirt feeble but persistent.

You gave in, moving away from him to remove the shirt quickly, along with all the rest of your clothes. He waited patiently, mouth open, skin flushed, cock straining.

You sat beside him on the bed, putting two fingers beneath the collar to pull him toward you. He moved easily with your guidance, the bell tinkling ever so softly as you caught his swollen lips with yours again.

You ran a teasing finger along the shaft of his cock and it came away covered in pre-cum. Satan whined against your lips and the sound of it sent a shiver through your body.

You pulled away just a little bit. "Use your words, Tantan. Or would you rather meow for me?"

Satan shuddered and the bell tinkled. "Please, MC," he said, his voice low and gruff. It seemed he wasn't quite comfortable enough to meow and his eyes were closed again, his face turned slightly away.

"Look at me," you said.

Obediently, Satan opened his eyes and looked at you. He might have been frowning if he wasn't so overcome with lust in that moment. You took in the darkness of his eyes, the heat clearly visible on his skin, the expression that vacillated between need and embarrassment.

You realized you could tease him for hours if you really wanted to. You also knew that he would let you. Something about the way he was looking at you let you know that he was trusting you entirely. That he was putting himself in your hands, letting you do whatever you wanted to with him.

Certainly, part of this had been previously discussed. The two of you had an established routine, after all. But he was entrusting you with more than he normally did and you recognized that extra vulnerability.

The light of your room hit the silver of the bell around his neck. You took in the collar, the ears. Maybe next time, you could get him to meow for you.

For now, though, you wanted nothing more than to hear that bell chime with every thrust.

You leaned forward, running your fingertips down his cheek. "You're such a good boy," you said, loving the way he seemed to melt whenever you praised him.

You took hold of his collar again, this time pulling him with you as you sat back against the pillows of your bed. You had considered other positions, but you wanted to see that bell as it sounded through the room.

Satan moved where you guided him, but when you let go of the collar, he no longer waited for your direction. He put his lips on your neck, straddling your hips, pressing himself against your cock, his hands roaming across your shoulders and chest.

Satan hesitated, pulling back to look into your eyes. It was as though he caught himself being too eager and now he needed your confirmation.

You had already taken a bottle of lube from your nightstand and now you slathered your fingers with it. You smirked at the way Satan reacted when you slipped them inside him, carefully, one by one. He shivered and the bell tinkled.

You took your time with him until he was whining again, his eyes squeezed shut. When you pulled your fingers out, he didn't wait for anything else. He slowly sank down on your cock and you watched his expression change as he took it all in.

Satan arched his back and your eyes fixed on the brightness of the bell around his neck.

To your great satisfaction, that bell did indeed jingle with every thrust, louder than it had from anything else. Satan was almost creating the sound himself, bracing his hands against your shoulders as he moved himself. But your hands were on his hips, guiding him, and you couldn't prevent yourself from thrusting up into him as well.

The way his moans mingled with the chimes, the way he flung back his head - he was beautiful. There was a soft rumble in his chest and it seemed he was okay with purring if not meowing.

Satan was lost in the sensation of you inside him, but you found it was easy to make him react even more by nibbling a little on his flushed skin. He gasped and clenched down on you every time he felt your teeth pierce him.

You could tell it wouldn't take much more. He had been so good for you and you wanted to reward him. So you took hold of his already slick cock and pumped.

Satan's nails dug into your skin, the bell continuing to jingle as he kept up his pace. His eyes flew open and he looked at you with an expression unlike anything you had ever seen - desperate, begging, needing something more from you.

"It's okay," you said softly. "Come for me, Satan."

It was exactly what he needed to hear. You watched as Satan bit his lip, his body arching as his cum spurted across his stomach.

Satan's body relaxed, the bell no longer jingling as he settled in your lap. He looked at you with heavy eyes. The cat ears were still on his head, but they were askew, poking oddly out of his blond hair.

You reached up to fix them. "Promise me you'll wear these again."

Satan let out a huff, frowning. "I couldn't refuse you even if I wanted to."

You smirked. "Good thing you don't want to, then."

Satan pulled himself up off of your lap and proceeded to give you the most amazing head of your life. It was a struggle not to knock off the cat ears while your hands were twisting in his hair.

Perhaps next time, you would bring a little leash, too. You were curious about how he would react to such an addition. Although he seemed unlikely to do this again when his brothers were around, so you might have to wait. You caught yourself kind of hoping one of his brothers would come home just to hear the consistent jingling of the bell on Satan's cat collar.

masterlist | Thank you for reading!

[thewritetofreespeech]

Could I request the Obey Me brothers reacting to their s/o sending them selfies of them in skimpy outfits or completely nude?

Obey me Brothers + spicy pics from MC

Lucifer

Another tedious meeting that should have been an email. But Lucifer remained professional and stalwart as ever, so as to not embarrass Lord Diavolo.

The only exception he made was for his cellphone. Keeping it on silent, but on the table, as Lucifer had learned in the past if he didn’t check it at least regularly during these meetings it might be too late from when his brothers’ hijinks might ensure. Vering into calamity past hijinks.

He noticed he had a text from [Y/N] and was surprised as they usually never texted him when he was in these meetings. Respecting his work. If they were texting him, Lucifer assumed it was important and opened the text in a reserved manner so as not to draw attention.

When he saw what the text was, however, he had to grip his phone tight to the point of cracking to maintain that composure.

“I’m sorry, but you’ll have to excuse me. It seems there is an important matter I must deal with at home. I’ll be back once the matter is taken care of. Thoroughly.”

Mammon

“Mammon-san! Over here!”

“Yes! That’s perfect! Hold that pose!”

“You look amazing Mammon-san!”

The Avatar of Greed grinned roguishly as he was showered with praise. He had to admit, he really was killing this photoshoot.

The photographer took a few more shots before they called for a break and the team moved in to touch him up. Offering him compliments still, along with water. Both of which Mammon drank up. One of the attendants handed him his phone from his dressing room. Giving him a few moments to check it before it was back to work.

He looked at a missed text from [Y/N] and nearly did a spit take of his water. Able to thankfully keep it down, but still coughed in a very un-model like manner at seeing their nearly naked form.

“I uh…I gotta go. We have enough for the magazine right?? Good. Great! Thanks for the opportunity and be sure to call me again!”

Mammon was then out the door fast than anyone could catch him. Including to get his wardrobe outfit off.

“Models….” The photographer muttered as he reset his camera to take shots of the background models in the meantime.

Levi

“On your right! On your right! NO! Your other right!!” Levi shouted into his headset as he tried to lead his team through the maze of undead swarm.

Zombie Zion XX9 had just come out this week and Levi had been grinding non-stop. He barely made time to sleep, much less do anything else, in pursuit of this final battle with the Mother Swarm of zombies (there by defeating the plague and saving the world from the undead at last).

“Guys, we have to get through the door together, otherwise we don’t get the ‘In This Together’ buff! You need to catch up to me! It’s…It’s…ugh! Hold on!” His phone had been buzzing beside him non-stop for the past minute with various texts.

Usually, he would ignore it. But something this persistent typically meant it was important, and what if it was his brothers telling him the house was on fire? He’d have to save his Ruri-chan figures if that was the case.

When he opened the text, Levi’s eyes bugged out and he felt his nose begin to well up with blood as he looked at the picture of [Y/N] in their cosplay panties.

“Levi! Where are you?! We’re getting hammered out here! Levi-!” The connection on his game went dead as the last of his team members died. The screen fading into a black screen of ‘game over’.

“Oh, come on!”

Satan

This anthology that Simeon had recommended to him was thrilling. Truly a masterpiece.

Satan had been absorbed into the new series almost since the first page. Devouring each of the nine books with vigor, much like his little brother did with food. He had forsaken all else, honestly, except reading the past few days. Anxious to find out who the final killer & mastermind behind the protagonist’s plight was, and finally get some answers.

He was nearly at the climax, the big reveal, when his phone started to buzz.

Grumbling that his concentration was broken, Satan picked it up to see who it was. His irksomeness quickly dissolving as he saw [Y/N]’s nearly naked chest in front of him.

He had a choice to make.

Continue reading and get the answers he needed, or put the book down and go to the person clearly in need of him. How was he to choose?

In the end, he put the book down and sprinted off to where [Y/N] was. If the main character could wait 10 years to find out who the killer was, surely Satan could wait a little longer to find out as well.

Asmo

Shopping was one of Asmo’s favorite past times. Going to stores and looking for the perfect item or accessory was like a little treasure hunt to him. Or just perusing the aisles and new merch like one would an art gallery, with the same enthusiasm for beauty. It was a wonderful afternoon. Especially if [Y/N] was with him.

[Y/N] had gone to try on some items that they found while Asmo continued to scan over the racks. His cellphone eventually buzzed, and he fumbled with his iced coffee to get it out of his bag. Seeing a picture of [Y/N] in the dressing room in a super cute bra and panty set with the question :should I get it?:

:OMG yes! 💓🥵🔥🔥: Asmo texted back immediately.

:It looks so good on you! Which dressing room are you in?? I want to see it in person! Should we get matching ones??:

He eventually found [Y/N] and showered them with praise. Insisting that he would buy it for them if they didn’t get it themselves, and offered to buy it in every color as well.

Beel

“98…99…100.”

Beel lifted the weights one final time and put the bar back on the rack. The weights clanking down with a heavy thud with the sheer mass of them. He loved getting a good workout in before he went home.

Heading over to his locker space to get some water and check his phone, Beel saw he had a text from [Y/N]. He opened it and saw the spicy picture they had just sent him. Usually only the 5x Hellfire Spicy noodles were the only spice that could make him drool this much. Clearly he was wrong.

Beel decided to, for once, cut his work out short. He quickly packed his bag and ran home to do some cardio on the way home. Planning to do some more ‘cardio’ when he got there.

He could make up for the missed sets in the morning before school. Since he’d be busy the rest of the night.

Belphie

Belphie yawned and rolled over as he woke up from his nap. His fifth of the day, so it was a pretty short one. Only about an hour this time.

He stretched and rubbed his eyes before reaching for his phone to see what time it was. He was immediately greeted with a text from [Y/N] on the screen. He felt a little bad for missing it while he was a sleep, but by now they had to know that he would get back to them eventually. Belphie opened it and was immediately greeted with something from his dreams.

:Are you still wearing that?: He texted them back.

:Come to my room: He then added. :In the attic. I’m still in bed. So half the work is done😉.:

He waited to hear back from [Y/N] and grinned when he saw them respond with they were on their way.

And his brothers made fun of him for being in bed all the time. With his soft mattress and [Y/N], why would he ever want to leave?

[petitelepus]

Starscream reader part 2! But it’s Muichiro early birthday gift special!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO WONDER TWINS!

A/N: Tanjiro Kamado, Yuichiro Tokito, Muichiro Tokito, Kie Kamado, Fem!Reader, Techo-Organic Reader, Modern!AU

WARNING: KAREN

You had been living with Tanjiro Kamado and his family for a good month already and life was surprisingly good in there. While it did take a moment, you started to slowly heal and finally trust again thanks to the young boy and his lovely nurturing family.

As long as you stayed with them, you had a roof over your head and all the bread you could eat. The least you could do was to help around the bakery.

In the beginning, you were an absolute nightmare in the kitchen and… You still were, but at least you could handle the register very well and knew what kind of bread to recommend to customers since you ate the said delicious treats daily.

You were just done serving a customer with Tanjiro, who smiled at you, "I'm going to check how the cake is doing! Can you watch the register while I'm in the kitchen?"

"Of course, leave it to mighty me!" You nodded proudly and the young man smiled happily, "Thank you!" and just like that, he was gone.

You hummed as you watched after him, but that was when the bell by the door chimed, letting you know that you had a new customer.

"Welcome!" You chirped happily like a little bird as you turned to address the new customer, no, customers!

"Ah, there's someone new here?"

You blinked as you watched these two identical boys, brothers most likely step into the bakery. The only way you could tell them apart was that one was wearing a blue shirt and the other one was wearing a black one.

You smiled and were about to greet them when the one in a black shirt snorted, "Cosplaying in broad daylight? How bold."

You blinked as you registered his words and that smile of yours turned forced. You had been spending enough time on Earth to know what cosplaying was and while it might have been a compliment, these boys made it sound almost like an insult!

"Excuse-!" You were saying when the boys looked past you and smiled, "Tanjiro!"

"Muichiro and Yuichiro!" Tanjiro appeared from the backroom and smiled happily as he made his way to the twins. You watched the young men talk and share smiles with each other and you realized that they must have been Tanjiro's good friends.

"Oh, Muichiro and Yuichiro, this is my new friend and our part-time worker!" The young man smiled as he introduced you to the twins, "She actually comes from another planet!"

"Is that what she has been telling you?" Muichiro asked and Yuichiro smiled, "Is that what she believes in?"

"You little pieces-!" Your smile tightened and you bit your lip so you wouldn't lose your cool. Tanjiro laughed, "No no, she actually does! Look, her wings are the real deal and she can actually fly! I've seen it myself!"

"Yes, I'm the offspring of a mighty race from outer space!" You nodded, chin high up in pride, "There isn't another one like me on this miserable little planet!"

"We believe you." The twins nodded with those damn grins and you felt like you were being made fun of again!

"Your birthday cake should be done any time soon! I'm going to go and see!" Tanjiro smiled as he stepped around the counter and went to the backroom where the kitchen was.

As soon as he was gone, you and the twins were left alone and you turned to look at them, "So it's your birthday, huh?"

"Yes," They both nodded and shot right back at you, "So you can connect spots like that? Pretty impressive."

"Congratulations…! Though…" You smirked, "I didn't know seaweed could grow on knuckleheads also."

"I see nasty bitches come in every size and shape." Yuichiro shot back at you and Muichiro backed up his big brother, "But we knew that already."

"Cheeky little smartasses, huh?" You could almost feel a vein popping on your temple…!

Suddenly the door chimed and a woman stepped into the bakery.

"Ah, welc-!" You turned to greet the woman, but she cut you off, "Yeah yeah, where is the owner!?"

You blinked. Miss Kamado was currently baking the birthday cake in the kitchen, but you got a bad feeling from this woman so you just smiled politely, "Miss Kamado isn't available right now, but I'm here. What is it that you desire?"

"I want to complain!" The woman reached for her shoulder bag and slammed a plastic wrapper on the table before you, "This bread was dry as a desert and it obviously had nuts in it!"

"Oh, and-!"

"I could have died!" The woman shouted as she glared at you, "I demand compensation for all the suffering I've been exposed to!"

You frowned, "I'm sorry Ma'am, of course, but all our breads clearly state what's in them. May I see your receipt-?"

"And I'm telling you idiot that there were nuts in this!"

Okay, this lady was clearly a Karen that you had heard about. You frowned, not really sure how to handle this. If Karen kept shouting like she was doing she would finally alert Tanjiro and his mother and those pure loving people wouldn't be able to handle a Karen! She would eat them alive, so you were on your own!

…Or so you thought.

"Ma'am…" Muichiro grabbed the plastic wrapper and looked at it, "This isn't this bakery's product."

"W- wha-!?" The Karen stuttered angrily, "What, are you calling me a liar!?"

"Well…" The younger twin shrugged and his older brother grabbed the wrapper," This is clearly a supermarket bread. And it states with big letters that there might be traces of nuts in it."

"Can't you read?"

"I-!" The Karen scowled, "How should I have noticed that!?"

"Usually when you're allergic to something, the first thing you do is check the list of the ingredients." Muichiro hummed and his brother snorted, "Are you even allergic to nuts?"

"I could have been!" Karen shouted and Muichiro rolled his eyes, "So you're basically crying wolf?"

"W- What-!?"

"Oh, sorry, let us make it simple so even you lady can understand," Yuichiro smirked, "It means you are exaggerating over nothing."

"I-!" Karen turned to look at you, "Are you going to let your employees talk to me like that!?"

"Ma'am, they are paying customers." You shrugged but you couldn't help but smile smugly, "Unlike you."

"We certainly see some nut in here and it's not in the bread." The twins chuckled and the Karen turned red as a beet as she was humiliated.

"That's it! I'm leaving and never coming back here!" She screamed, quickly turning to leave the bakery.

"Don't let the door hit you on the way out!" You called after her and smiled, "Have a nice life!"

"Bite me!" She snapped and just like that, she was gone. You and the twins glanced at each other and the three of you couldn't help but laugh a little. That's when Tanjiro entered the room.

"I'm sorry, we were whipping cream so we couldn't hear anything!" The young man smiled as he looked around, looking confused to see only you and his friends there, "Did someone shout in here?"

"No one important." You and the twins said exactly the same time and Tanjiro smiled, "I'm happy to see you three get along! Cake should be done soon so please make yourselves comfortable and I'll call you when it's done!"

"Thank you, Tanjiro!" The boys smiled and you nodded as the Kamado returned to the backroom. Once he was gone again, you turned to look at the twins and nodded at them, "Thanks…"

"No worries," Muichiro nodded and so did Yuichiro, "You looked like a fish out of water."

"Yeah… One would think I'm used to shouting idiots and tyrants…" You sighed as you crossed your arms, "Living here has made me soft."

"That's the Kamado effect," The twins smiled, "So don't worry, you aren't the only one."

Speaking of Kamado, when you talk about them one appears!

"Cake is done!" Tanjiro cheered, "Come and get some!"

"Coming!" The twins called as they stepped around the counter and moved to enter the private section of the bakery.

You smiled a little as you watched them go, "Hey?"

"Hm?"

"I know we didn't start with a right foot." You looked away a little stubbornly, "So… Sorry about earlier, and happy birthday to you two."

"Thanks," They both nodded with small smiles as they entered the backroom and you hummed as you returned to the register… Then Tanjiro popped up with a huge smile, "Yuichiro and Muichiro asked if you would like to join us?"

"W-?" You blinked, stunned by the offer, "Really?"

"Yes!" The young man smiled so happily and you found yourself unable to say no to him, "Tch, okay, but I'm not singing any birthday songs…"

[captain-aralias]

giving birth

idk, i'm pretty sure some people wouldn't write a post about going into labour on tumblr, but it's a thing i wanted to write about, so - it's here if you want it! if you'd rather avoid, don't click the read more.

things normal people might want to know outside the cut:

baby is now 11 days old <3 things are generally going well. i sleep between about 11pm and 3am, and then again 8am to 10am

it's been hard to get enough brain together to write a post like this, reply to comments, read fic, etc, as many of my most cogent hours have been visitor hours or hanging out with my partner. the night shift is not a good time to do things that aren't watching TV. i've managed to Read Half a Book (daisy jones and the six - easy going, i like it)

i was going to cosplay him as baby simon snow left at the orphanage, but he looks nothing like simon (much more like baz - currently: grey eyes, reddish-gold skin, dark hair), and also i don't want to write on my baby :o

surprise fourth entry: we think the terrace house next door has been turned into a brothel ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ok - birth stuff after this. not too much gory detail, probs, but some.

the beginning part you already know!

waters broke on thursday 11th, just after i woke up. this was two days after the stitch was removed, and therefore almost certainly related, so hooray for stitch! kept the baby in until 37 weeks.

i'd been worried that i might not realise my waters had broken, as apparently this is totally possible. i am here to tell you - that YES, it is possible. i clocked what it probably was immediately, but also it wasn't a 4 cups of liquid is everywhere sort of deal, it was more like - about half a cup every hour or so. and so i thought - this is probably what is happening, but maybe it's not and i should have done more pelvic floor exercises.

went to hospital. got hooked up to the machine that monitors baby heartbeat and movement. nothing much happening, although heartbeat all ok. the midwife on duty was called 'merlyn' - true story.

she asked me to walk around for a bit and come back, so my partner and i walked to the costa coffee inside the hospital. i ordered one of the new 'bubble' drinks, because i thought - why not? it's sugary and cold, these are things that make babies move. the drink was...... not good. blueberry slushy with cream on top and bubbles that were a) too big to fit through the absolutely normal straw and b) apparently were a cross between blueberries and popping boba. i say apparently as i'd given up by then and my partner ate them.

anyway - this detail included just to show you how surreal and nothingy early labour was. we walked back, hooked back up to the machine. baby now kicking a bit, and merlyn asked me whether i just had a really high pain tolerance and therefore wasn't upset about the contractions. i said, 'i dont know - guess we're about to find out' 🤔

agreed i probably wasn't in labour yet, so i was sent home, but asked to come back at 4.30 for my pre-scheduled scan with the nice doctor who first realised my cervix was open, and who we've seen regularly since (because my partner rang to complain when we had no follow up, and because this doctor was the one who rang us back and then made sure we were seen afterwards. not brilliant work from NHS administrators).

was also told if i didn't go into labour before hand, to come back at 8.30am (24 hours after waters broken) to be induced. given leaflet about induction methods. key take away - could take up to 3 days. sounds terrible.

home for 2 hours, back to hospital for scan.

we were waiting around for about half an hour. shown in - doctor says, 'we've had some difficult patients today, sorry! but you should be easy'. my partner tells her my waters have broken - she's surprised! (but pleased) no one has managed to tell her or put it in any notes, which she just reviewed. again - great job. i do love you NHS, but what is going on? a student midwife is trying to scan me - and has had to deal with all these previous difficult cases. with little amniotic fluid left, her job is basically impossible. sorry :'(

but - waters breaking confirmed! honestly, until that point i was still not sure. doctor says, induction could be offered immediately, but we mostly don't do that as in almost all cases you go into labour before 24 hours. i said thank you again for spotting my cervix being open. weird to think we won't see her again!!

went home. watched the end of 'little dorrit' (overall - it's good. so many famous people. the ending is a bit all over the place, though). about 9pm started feeling period-pain type pain. figured: probably a contraction! definitely did not feel like i expected in that there was no real release. it was just - now you're having a painful period. i called maternity triage again to say there was blood in the water now, and they reminded me that was totally normal (mucus plug, i guess) and to come back when things were serious.

so - i went to sleep.

woke up at about 2am. contractions now serious business, but also still... not as serious as i'd expected. again: basically it felt like period pain, this time crossed with constipation. and then it would go away, and i'd feel totally normal again, which i was not expecting.

we'd been told to come in when the contractions were every 5 minutes for an hour. my contractions were coming about ever 2-3 minutes. after about 20 minutes, i told my partner that i wanted to go to the hospital now, even if we should really wait. this was the RIGHT decision.

i'm the only one who can drive our car. it was obviously not a good idea to drive the car. i called an uber. unfortunately the labour ward is on the other side of the hospital to the main entrance, and doesn't have an address you can give uber..... retrospectively i'd have done better just putting in the street, like i usually did, but i tried to use the labour ward post code. we ended up at the main entrance, which was shut.

erin (my partner) keeps telling people that the uber drive was annoyed i slammed the door of his car, but i honestly do not remember this. the drive was about 10 minutes, during which i alternated between feeling bad and feeling totally fine.

we didn't bother trying to direct the driver to the right part of the hospital, just got out. erin wanted to go and get a wheelchair, but i didn't want to just sit on the ground outside the hospital in the middle of the night while she did that, and i felt completely fine ... except when i didn't.

so we walked to the labour ward. it's about 5 minutes from the entrance. i sat on the floor when the contractions came. then walked again. cool times.

arrived at maternity triage. again, it felt like going there every other time we'd ever been there - my key take away is that most of being in labour was extremely underwhelming. pain was not great, to the extent that i was thinking 'i can see why people don't like labour, maybe this was a terrible idea', but i could still think things like that. they hooked me up to the same machine as they had in the morning, and this time it said - yes, definitely in labour (which i knew, but ho hum - it was doing its best!).

asked to confirm i was a low risk pregnancy. we were like - nope, don't think so. ivf, stitch, isnt that in the notes??

a midwife came over and was like - "WOW, you're 8cm dilated." (of the necessary 10cm) at which point they started to take everything a bit more seriously. but they also described a bunch of pain relief options - and i was like, whatever, give me whatever i can have. and then was told - oh no, you actually can't have pethadine, water birth, or epidural of these as you're too far along. (which i also knew, but then why offer?)

i'd sort of suspected this might be the case, given how my cervix tried to open at 21 weeks. so my birth plan was basically 'whatever'. v glad i hadn't had my heart set on anything in particular.

they wheeled me down the corridor to one of the birthing rooms. they wouldn't let me go to the toilet in case i had the baby in the toilet..... that's how quickly things were happening.

i managed to change into the hospital gown, then got onto the bed. 'this is such a comfortable bed' i told my partner, although later (post birth) i realised that it wasn't... but i appreciated it a lot at the time.

i WAS allowed gas and air, hurrah. i'm extremely keen on doing things that make my life easier, so i accepted, obvs. basically, you breathe in during the contractions, and breathe out of the mask normally when you're not contracting.

THIS made the whole experience very different from just 'intense period pain', in part probably because the pain was ramping up, but also because whenever i wasn't contracting i felt completely off my face from the gas. overall, i thought this was a decent pain relief option. i also liked how breathing in the gas gave me something to focus on while pain was happening and it was a clear signal to everyone else that it was happening.

i probably had about... 5 more before my body was like 'maybe time to push'. (it really did feel different/like an actual urge). midwife told me i couldn't have the gas and air anymore - boo - just focus on pushing when the urge came.

pushed...... but obviously it hurt, so even though they were like 'keep pushing!' i thought, i will just relax because that's less painful. (great job, brain.) but i only faked out twice.

they invited a doctor in, because i was bleeding, and baby's heartrate was dropping. i agreed to the episiotomy because even though i reeeally didn't want that, i obviously would do whatever to get the baby safe.

retrospectively, my partner and i think that probably i was bleeding because i'd just had the stitch out two days before and those wounds had opened. but neither of us thought of it at the time, and no one assisting with the birth had had time to read the notes. (this is a theme of the post, not to be too whingey - but it was a shame). but anyway, the cutting (boo) came with a side of local anaesthetic (HOORAY) so actually it felt like a very good decision at the time, even above baby's safety.

one more contraction, one more push - baby was born in one go.

he's premature-levels of small at 5lb 10oz (5th percentile), even though he's technically full term. this is why erin and i think the bleeding was from the stitch rather than the baby, although one of the midwives suggested perhaps he was holding his arm up next to his face and that made him seem bigger. the scan we got the day before estimated his weight as being more normal, but scans are super unreliable particularly late in pregnancy.

really a very easy birth, as far as i can tell. i had slept through a lot of the early stage. the fear of being at home at not with medical professionals was the worst bit (and we fixed that by just going in even when we weren't sure) and as soon as it was over, i felt immediately fine. the whole thing had taken 2 hours tops. baby born at 4.30am.

i thought i'd cry when they gave me the baby, but actually i was too surprised that he was actually there and alive. (my partner cried.) the umblical cord looks creepy and alien. we'd agreed a medical professional should cut the cord, rather than erin (who wants to do this? they just want dads to feel involved). i got to hold him baby while they gave me the shot to deliver the placenta. barely felt it.

then had to give baby to erin for 30 minutes while a fuck tonne of stitches were put in... the amount of sewing involved was definitely worrying. i'd assumed maybe like... two stitches, but... it was a lot. can't recommend (though could not feel it at the time.)

after that, we just got to hang out in the room. i showered, changed, they brought me (but not erin) some breakfast and lunch. they did tests on the baby, most of which he passed. didn't pass the hearing test but apparently this is normal, as lots of babies have fluid in their ears. we think he can hear as he has startled at loud noises since. all the clothes i'd brought were hilariously too big.

sent home about 12 hours after the birth. could have stayed if we'd wanted to, but definitely did not.

i felt totally fine the entire day of the birth, full of LOTS of adrenalin. second day was also ok. third day was my crash. i got a cold, which was NOT good for my pelvic floor (and which i still have, RIP). my stitches hurt, the sleep debt had kicked in and i was hobbling everywhere, and breastfeeding wasn't going well. before the birth i'd been very much of the opinion that i'd breastfeed if it was easy, but i found it kind of weird and knew the health benefits were exaggerated. (but not completely, obviously). deep in my hormones, i was not able to hold onto this previously rational view. instead, i was thinking - i have no connection to my baby anymore.

i also cried at the song 'making a man' from the musical operation mincemeat (which is NOT an emotional song - but is about someone with the same name as my baby, who i'd just made), the beginning of the movie 'in the heights' (it was just so good!), the ending of the movie 'pride', and i cried again while describing what had happened at the end of 'pride' and how i'd cried.....

bought several breast pumps, fed the baby formula, took a day off from trying to breastfeed, things pretty much fixed for me (except for the crying at movies) by day 5. going to continue with combination feeding (i.e. breastmilk+formula) though, because it just seems insane to have to wake up every time the baby is hungry. what am i, a sadist? and when people are over - how good not to have to get your breasts out... thank you makers of formula.

ANYWAY. we're now on day 11. feels like baby is pretty easy going for a baby, he only cries when he needs something - which i appreciate, as it helps me keep him alive \o/ he will sleep in his basket, but only if he's already asleep. he prefers to be held. he can sleep for 3 hours at a time, but only during the day - at night you're lucky to get 1 hour, and he has been awake for about 2 hours at a time, unlike about 15 minutes average in the day. he smells nice, he wasn't cute-cute when he first came out, but he is getting extremely cute now and i think he looks more like my partner than an unknown donor (although still all to play for, i think). because he's still super small and almost pre-term, his legs and arms are still all curled up like he's in the womb, even though he's been out 11 days. but he's gradually uncurling them and stretching out.

i like holding him. he makes funny faces. he has a LOT of hair - which means the heartburn was right about that one. (n.b. heartburn is linked to hair, this is an old wives tale that is now scientifically proven) think it's going well, overall <3

n.b. i had to pause at this point because baby woke up. what they say about baby boys peeing on you while you change their nappies is 100% accu-rat, but it's quite funny really. we haven't worked out how to stop it because putting a cloth over him makes him hold it in..... and then you remove the cloth....... fine comedy in action.

my bump was very small, so i was able to put my pre-pregnancy jeans back on after only a few days. hooray, i love jeans.

uterine contractions started about day 6 (this is a thing i feel i did not know about before being pregnant myself. 7 days worth of contractions post baby to bring your uterus back in line). wow, it's like MORE PERIOD PAIN. great. there's less blood than i expected, though. i also can't control my temperature well at night - so i'm super hot while asleep, then get out of bed and start shivvering. apparently this is what the menopause will be like. looking forward to that 😅

not much else to add except the brothel stuff. basically 2 nights ago, someone knocked on my front door at 4.30 (same time baby was born!) in the morning as i was sitting up with baby. rang the doorbell, walked round to peer through the window, and then knocked again. i would not have answered - just wanted him to go away, but erin came down and opened the door, which was (it turns out) the right thing to do, but i was not happy about it - as we live in a semi-dodgy neighbourhood, although i've always felt relatively safe as we're off the highstreet and there are often people outside the pub until 1-2am, which is annoying but also feels like they'd see and stop anything bad.

i was running through scenarios like 'and then he breaks in' or 'and then he stabs whoever opened the door' in my mind. instead he just said something like - 'do you know where the whorehouse is?' and erin said 'wtf, it's 3am' and closed the door.

this could have just been a random incident, and indeed i didn't hear him say 'whorehouse' so i thought it was just a drunk guy asking for directions. but once she told me what he'd said, we then realised that the house next door to us... probably is a brothel. it's been renovated by our ex-neighbours and rented out, all the windows are blacked out, including the skylight we can see out of our windows. there's a complex doorbell system, they refuse to take our packages in, they don't have any bins out the front (which is presumably because no one is using the house as a house), and we've definitely heard people having sex through the walls. though erin thinks they've put up sound insulation just in time to not have to hear the baby crying in retaliation.

she's american and leftie and very against cops, so i'm trying not to be a karen about it. i have not reported it to the police, but i have said to erin already that if anything else happens that makes me feel unsafe...... i probably will. the man knocking on the door makes me not want to be awake with the baby in the night, even though nothing happened. (he broke the first rule of secret brothel - you DONT talk about secret brothel). we don't have our ex-neighbours details, so reporting is all we could do. apart from i guess ask them to move.... (won't be doing that, obvs. confrontation? no thanks.)

hopefully it's fine, and they will just move on at some point. VERY weird, though. and not what i need while hopped up on hormones.

glad to have written this post! feels like a good turning point in baby land, being able to write some words even if it's just this stream of consciousness. i also logged back into work Teams to send some pictures. since he was born, have been out with baby to the midwife (in the car), marks and spencers (in the car with pram), boots (in the pram), and today to a hipster coffee shop (in car, baby slept in pram bassinet). might reply to some comments tomorrow. working back up to actually writing some fic or finishing my lego.

also - it's (almost) hitting me that i have 9 months off work. apart from the sleep, i feel like i could go back to work now.... but i WANT the time off. but usually i only take 2 weeks off, and i've done that now... so it's time to go back to work...

i did read a bunch of other messages on Teams/Slack when i was posting the pictures. v hard not to care. even with something much more important to do.

ok - going to eat some food, now. thank you to anyone who read this far! hope it was interesting as well as long.

not tagging this pregnancy as i was doing it so people could block the tag, but people who don't know me literally found my posts and read them. and ... that's not what this is for.

[im-not-a-l0ser]

Here's the beginning of my WIP for this prompt.

@milgram has also written this prompt, which definitely motivated me, since people were actually interested in it-- and you can go read that if you aren't satisfied with my incomplete story-- along with @gomen 's comment. So. Hope you guys enjoy.

Comments, reblogs and any other form of peer pressure on this will be very helpful, so have at it. Even art mayhaps 👀

Max wasn’t a nerd, but he did like Pokemon. Looking at Pokemon shit on TikTok didn’t make him a nerd. 

Everyone liked Pokemon! Everyone grew up with Pokemon and wanted a relationship with their pet like Ash had with Pikachu. And most people liked Pokemon Go, especially Max, since it gave him a nice excuse to not be in the house.

Either way, scrolling through Pokemon stuff and going down a rabbit hole of Pokemon cosplays didn’t make him a nerd. 

The person he was stuck on right now went by the name Rocket or “Rocky”, which he assumed was a reference to their first cosplay: James from Team Rocket. Which was also the first one that Max saw.

The third video on their account was one of him in both a Jesse and a James cosplay, doing the Team Rocket opening. 

(Max might’ve watched that video about seven or eight times, entranced by how amazing the cosplays were)

The most remarkable thing about any of Rocky’s cosplays was the makeup. With white eye-liner making his eyes look bigger and more like an anime character, and contour depeaning their features, and everything accented the colour of his contacts and the shade of his wig. 

Max scrolled through about half their content in two hours, everything ranging from Pokemon to Persona 5 to JuJutsu Kaisen and Bungo Stray Dogs. Max didn’t know what most of those were, but the cosplayer made them look so beautiful and interesting. Despite the fact that Max didn’t know any of the characters, he was always heartbroken through every angst post. 

Ones that really got to him were characters named ‘Atsushi,’ and ‘Akutagawa.’ Admittedly, Akutagawa reminded him of himself, and how much he wanted to please the Dazai that was his father. 

Apparently Rocky liked Dazai, which Max just did not understand; he did not seem like a likeable character. Hell, the character himself did not like himself— from what Max saw, it looked like his whole personality was suicide and killing. 

A video of Rocky dressed like ‘PM Dazai’ essentially flirting with the camera, captioned ‘POV: You’re literally anyone in the Port Mafia,’ made Max blush. He’d never ever admit that, but wow. Who knew a dark wig, brown contacts, a suit, and bandages could be so charming. 

Max liked his ‘Rin Okumura’ cosplay, which looked like he used his natural eyes and hair for. 

Well, not natural hair, but his actual hair. His hair was dyed a dark blue, but Max could tell it wasn’t a wig because of the shaved sides beneath the hair. 

He looked kind of familiar, but he was just… he was kind of just a white guy with blue eyes and short hair. And Max wasn’t great with faces generally, it was probably just another white guy. 

Max laughed loudly when he found Rocky’s Hatsune Miku cosplay, and smiled at the caption that said ‘look… my friends kept harassing me about cosplaying her, and they bought everything for it, so i guess i owed it to them.’

Not that it was the first time seeing Rocky in shorts, but Max did quite like the Hatsune Miku cosplay too. 

Rocky seemed to be most proud of his ‘Sigma’ and ‘Nikolai’ cosplays. Which, when Max looked up pictures of the characters, he decided that yes, Rocky should be proud of them. They were both very personalised, and Rocky did an amazing job of making Nikolai look as deranged as he did in the show— according to a few gifs Max saw. 

Sigma made Max sad, but wow Rocky was so pretty. With shimmery eyeshadow and coloured lashes that matched Sigma’s split hair, and beautiful lavender contacts that exposed just enough of Rocky’s natural blue eyes to compliment them perfectly. 

The first night Max had seen Rocky’s account, he didn’t end up getting to sleep until about 2 am.

From there, he kept up on his account. 

In every video, Rocky was so amazing and beautiful, and Max who wasn’t in any way interested in cosplay and cosplaying but anyone would be able to tell how much passion and dedication was put into every character. 

Just looking at him made him smile. 

He left one comment and a few likes, despite watching dozens of videos. He didn’t want to spam like and get Rocky shadow-banned. 

‘I don’t give a shit about anime, but you look fantastic. Just wow.’

And he finally went to bed.

In the morning, he had a notification; a response from Rocky. 

‘... What? How did you get here??? Wtf??’

Max laughed. 

‘Idk, but I like it here.’

The response came fairly quickly. 

‘Okay I guess?’

___________________

“Hey, so you guys know my online self, Rocky?” Richie asked, stabbing the sub-par cafeteria food with his flimsy plastic fork.

“Sure,” Pete responded. 

“Yeah, still waiting for you to invite me to film with you,” Ruth pouted.

“After you get the headgear off,” Richie dismissed. He swallowed and leaned closer to his friends. “Max Jagerman found my account.”

[ask-de-writer]

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THE FISHERMAN'S LEG (Part 17 of 20)

A sequel to Dee 1/2 Demon

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

21738 words (work in progress)

© 2023 by Glen Ten-Eyck

All rights reserved. This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

TUMBLR EXEMPTION

Blog holding members of Tumblr.com may freely reblog this story provided that the title, author and copyright information remain intact, unaltered, and are displayed at the head of the story.

Fan art, stories, music, cosplay and other fan activity is actively encouraged.

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New to the story? Read from the beginning HERE.

~~ ~~ ~~ ~~

Minami cringed into a lump but raised a finger to speak.

Magistrate Lim nodded his permission. Minami whimpered, “I spoke out of anger and fear, saying what I should not. I would take back those words.”

The Magistrate nodded, “I can easily understand that, however such things, once said, must by Law be investigated. You have said both that you saw Dee san and ALL SIX of her minions commit a murder. Further, you claimed that they had murdered hundreds.

“These claims are deadly serious and you must back up such an accusation against the Healers of Sabo, Dee san, Miko san, Satsuna san and Patsu san. The only place where they had three others was up at the Umayu Summer Castle, when it was being used as the Hospice for the Mortally Wounded.”

Remembering in time to rais his finger, Minami questioned, “Was it not a Hospital for Serious Wounds?”

Bobbing the bow of conversation, the Magistrate replied, “I fear not. EVERY person sent there was expected to die within a span of days to perhaps a week or a little more.” He paused for emphasis, “EVERY person. You included.”

Minami's brows pulled tight together, lips pinched, forehead wrinkled as he thought and questioned, “How could I have been dying?” He held up three fingers of his left hand and drew across them with his right index finger. “I had only a leg cut above the knee no longer than that.”

Doctor Siani held up a finger and bowed to the Magistrate. Upon being recognized, he requested, “May I be permitted to have conversation with Minami? I can explain to him his errors that came so close to killing him.”

Turning to face Minami, he began, “You made several deadly errors.”

Minami interrupted, “Impossible. I got bandages from beside your Healer's Tent fire. I rinsed and washed them most carefully before cleaning the wound and binding it up. I went to sleep. I did not awake until up at the hospit . . . hospice. I had a horrible sore throat that lasted weeks!

“My leg!” He pulled up the right leg of his loose work trowsers. “See that ghastly bungle? You call what those incompetent monsters did to my leg HEALING?” He was displaying above his knee, a deep scar-like hole that clearly showed his hamstring tendon in its depths.

“If you do not interrupt, I will answer. Yes, that leg is an amazing piece of healing. Those bandages that you got by our fire? They were meant to be burned entirely but missed the flames and landed beside it. We tried to stop you when you took them, but you called back that your wound was minor and you would take care of it yourself.

“Taking THOSE bandages was your first deadly error. Let me explain a thing. Among the things that we know of Gangrene is that whatever the principle that causes it, it cannot be washed or cleaned from bandages that have been used on it.

“When you tried to wash them and used them to clean the wound, you spread that deadly principle to every part of it.

“That was your second deadly error.

“When you were carried to us in the morning, the Gangrene that you introduced with those bandages was far advanced and you were flailing in a delirium of wound fever.

“You accuse them of causing you a great sore throat. I and the doctors with me did that. We could not get you still enough to amputate your leg at mid thigh. We put two tubes in your throat, one to let you breathe, the other, to your stomach. We administered a sedative tea through the tube.

“Removing the bandages showed us that you could not be saved by any means known to us. First, a glob of rotted flesh almost the size of my fist fell away with the bandages.

“Cleaning away the gangrene revealed that your hamstring was simply gone. Your knee was involved and severly damaged. Worst of all, the corruption had got inside your thigh bone through the nick made by the naginata.

“In the thousand years of the Nihoni Empire, only one man has recovered from that corruption of the leg bone. Yourself. And it was from the tireless work of those four that you revile so that that you did.”

“Impossible! As horrid looking as my leg is, it is not so severely damaged as you are saying! I have the tendon that you said was eaten away entirely! My knee, though rendered ugly, works! If what you just said is true, none of this should be! How come I have those things that you said were gone? Answer me that!”

Satsuna raised a finger and replied, “I, Dee, Miko and Patsu gave you those things. In retrospect, we should have simply let you die as you were expected to do. If we had, Ichuru san would still live, an outcome that every person in this Tribunal would prefer to having you here blustering your foolish and vile spew of words!”

Dee took up, “As you are well aware, I have the Aspect of Fire, a gift from the Oni who is my true father. You were dying, of that there could be no doubt. I used my Fire Sight to cleanse away the direct corruption. I then led it through your whole body burning away the wound fever and other problems that it causes. It was not easy to do. The extent of the harm required me to do it to you many times.

“After burning away the corruption and gangrene in your knee, Satsuna san had an idea. The body will absorb harmlessly some of the surgical threads that she makes. She wove a sort of bandage of it to cover the open side of your knee. We held it in place with some of the glue that Patsu makes. I removed a small amount of the good ligament and put it as tiny bits in her bandage before we covered it.

“It worked. In about a week, instead of a bandage like thing, new ligament had grown in its place. If we could do something similar to the hamstring tendon, you would have a working knee and no need for an amputation at all.”

To be Continued

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[mlobsters]

supernatural s13e6 tombstone (w. davy perez)

SAM No. You're – you're dead. CASTIEL Yeah, I was. But then I… annoyed an ancient cosmic being so much that he sent me back.

i mean. that's how i described it too. but laughing that we're seriously gonna say that in this moment without the boys reacting, lol okay!

please not this music, it's making me laugh. papa castiel is home! cue the cheesiest fucking emotional music. you know what it reminds me of? the zelda breath of the wild like... those flashback cut scenes, the memories? mushy ones with zelda haha (plinky piano bits around 19:19 if you're curious)

cas hitting the hug jackpot, 3 unsolicted ones! and the one with jack was sweet

whew and now we get cheesy old west music too.

DEAN Yeah, we've done more on less. Besides Dodge City's kind of, uh, kind of awesome. All right, well… two salty hunters, one half-angel kid, and a dude who just came back from the dead. Again. Team Free Will 2.0. Here we go.

no more suicidal dean apparently, get an unexpected resurrection and cowboy shenanigans and he's happy and fired up

one thing i find endlessly amusing/fascinating is how like, all these years we're gonna have silly little logistical questions like. how they clean their suits, are they doing dry cleaning, are they rolling up their suits in their duffels with everything else, etc etc. but we got to see some ironing not long back and now, dry cleaning bags!

cas's face is cracking me up

JACK He really likes cowboys. CASTIEL Yes. Yes, he does.

also my face at the creative team that decided this was part of dean's schtick. i want to let dean enjoy silly things. but they just push so hard

also they're gonna get one room (albeit a suite) for all 4 of them. jack doesn't sleep much, cas doesn't sleep at all. what are those two gonna do while the humans are sleeping? awkward

SAM You're in a good mood, huh? DEAN Yeah. And? SAM Nothing. No, no, I-I-I just, uh… you've been having a rough go, so it's… it's good to see you smile. DEAN Well, I said I needed a big win. We got Cas back. That's a pretty damn big win. SAM Yeah. Fair enough.

what's up with your attitude there, sam. you don't actually seem very happy. worried he's gonna crash and burn? jealous that it's cas? jealous that cas is taking jack from him? (lol)

little bonding for cas and jack while the humans were sleeping talking about his mom was nice

untitled 1 and 2 our old friends!! last seen i think in one episode in 10x10 and not quite some time before that. if my blog search/index wasn't so fucked i could find more details. song remains the same

set designers let the kitsch explode. those silhouettes

CASTIEL I told you. He's an angry sleeper. Like a bear.

cheesy but i laughed. i, too, wake up in a foul mood and should not be talked to

oh sure dean, you're cringing over cas's line but we've all been very generous in accepting your goofy ass shit like that bolo tie and need to cosplay tombstone to begin with

can truly appreciate the sheer awfulness of that hat cas is wearing out in the sunlight. it's so small, it's so translucent. cheapest of straw hats. (not knockin straw hats! my dad was an avid cowboy hat wearer and had a couple nice straw ones for the summer)

i don't pay too much attention to how time flows on this show, i do know sometimes it can be weeks between episodes, sometimes it's the next day (another thing that irked me on teen wolf was how they spent like... 2+ full seasons in one year to keep the kids in high school). but anyway, i just wonder how much show universe time cas was not off on some whatever, and around to do this stuff hanging out with them. them crammed in sam's room on his uncomfortable bed to watch a movie, like they did with charlie? lol. based on the number of times i've seen it in fic, i gather a bunker room with a tv does become a thing at some point, so maybe it was in there?

.... a shootout in the parking lot of the knockoff wells fargo in broad daylight. what planet are we on right now. so jack can accidentally kill a civilian with his powers, great

CASTIEL Jack, I've killed people who didn't deserve it… my friends– I've killed people I loved. I wish I could tell you that it– that it gets easier, that with time, it hurts less, but that would be a lie because it– it never gets easier. And those moments, they never stop hurting. But that doesn't mean that you should stop fighting. Doesn't mean that just because you made a mistake – and that's what this is, Jack. It's a mistake. That doesn't mean that you can't– can't be better, do better. I believe that. I have to believe that.

so the people he killed that he loved, would that be like. angelic siblings? wonder if the wiki keeps track of who killed whom. he killed a bunch of fake deans in that one episode lol

SAM And we still believe in you, Jack. We, uh– JACK Stop. Just… Please stop.

anyway, point being, wasn't this just an accident?? like when eileen accidentally killed the bmol dude? eileen got a hug and commiseration, they're talking about who they murdered and WE STILL BELIEVE YOU'RE NOT EVIL i would tell them to stop too!

why do they do this with him

JACK No, maybe you're right. Maybe I'm just another monster. DEAN No, you're not. I thought you were. I did. But… Like Sam said, we've all done bad. We all have blood on our hands. So if you're a monster, we're all monsters.

dean gets to have his little personal growth acknowledgement

really added dimension to the terror of thinking he's a monster like sam did, with a bunch of unintended injury and now death wrapped up in it. kind of hard to... care about anything except vaguely because we sitll barely know him but if i sit and think about it, sure

and a whole other thing dealing with kid having a meltdown when they can just teleport away.

oh god just considered now dean might feel extra guilty for telling jack he was a monster and he was gonna kill him, now that jack ran away. that could be the crash and burn :p

[mouseymousey]

A Starscream's Character Design Headcanon

Yes, Starscream doesn't usually have a canon reason he's the leader of the Seekers other than he's overly-charismatic and bossy or 'he just is', but I like to think the real reason he got the job was an accident in costume design. For one, he's G1 probably based off of pilots and their uniforms which lines up with the show's creation. (Modern-day, we would think the odd 'rectangles' on his legs were odd, but they used to be on some pilot uniforms.) HOWEVER, the way he wears his uniform and wings is so obviously boasting and dramatic. For one, the colors are too bright not to be seen. Secondly, everything frames his middle and face, and the style draws the eyes upward. Perhaps accidentally, this also means he has a great deal of armor on his back and not exclusively on his front like most Transformers do, needing to run into enemy fire quite often. He just has a lot of material on his back. I imagine Seekers face their enemy at the beginning of their battles, but they also are information-gatherers. This means, of course, they will be running AWAY from danger more than towards. Plus, it could be better for them to be easily seen since they don't make easy targets for ground soldiers anyway, AND it would be better (since they often have information stored on them) to be easily found by Deception forces should they go down). The material is coded anyway, so all the Autobots can't use much of it and would probably just destroy it (which probably would be the protocol anyway if they were captured). I believe Starscream updated his uniform without permission to look taller and frame his face and then took credit for 'being a genius' after he sustained less injury than other Seekers in battle. This would also explain why he has permission to make everyone look exactly like him. If you ever need reference pics for a cosplay, type "key aero military pilot from cold war" into Google or "american jet pilot from 60s salimbeti" and look at all the orange. (This might be the uniform that inspired the bright colors, but it might have also been leftover from Starscream's childhood since he didn't work in the mines like more Decepticons.)

[awesomelyanxiouspanda]

A Fiercely Bleeding Heart (Lucifer/OFC): Chapter 4

Story summary: Emery (Our lovely OFC) owns a thriving coffee shop smack dab in the middle of Monroe City, Mo. She’s well known for her unique coffee drinks and her “coffee charity”. What happens when a woman with too much heart- and not nearly enough common sense- comes across the fallen archangel in his mostly human state? Will Lucifer behave, or will he bite the hand that (quite literally) feeds him?

Warnings for this chapter specifically: THE SMUT IS FINALLY BEGINNING! We don’t have a full smut scene in here, but there’s a sexy little prelude and some background growth between Lucifer and Emery!

Warnings/Tags: Loosely based around S.13 E. 13! Plus size OC, OC is gullible and a big softie, Lucifer in his nearly human form, Soft Lucifer, Dean and Sam cosplaying FBI agents again, Canon typical violence, Non-Canon compliant story line, Soulmate AU-ish?, smut in future chapters, canon typical cursing, NOT a slow burn, not beta’d we die like our king Crowley, smut, mild smut, vaginal fingering,

A/N: It’s been a hot minute since I’ve written smut so I hope this is passable! 

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3

After an absolute overabundance of food was brought to the room, I was left to my own devices. It felt a little silly to just accept my current predicament but I kept trying to rationalize it to myself anyway. It wasn’t like I could just get up and leave, right? Who knew what enemies waited outside the room? Lucifer had said something about still dealing with Asmodeus and his people after all. And how would I even begin to find my way around? It’s quite possible there wasn’t even a direct route out of hell. Not to mention… I really didn’t want to let Lucifer down by disappearing or disobeying him. So, after eating and using the restroom, I simply collapsed back into the giant bed once more. It took no time to start feeling drowsy and, as I dozed off, I couldn’t help but think about asking Lucifer how to buy one of these beds for my own home.

“Rise and shine, princess!”

“Fuck!”

Heart pounding and eyes swimming nauseatingly, I rocketed upright and hastily searched the room in fear. Asmodeus. It had to be him!

“Whoa, whoa there, doll! Easy now,” Lucifer’s words filtered through my panic.

Finally, I spotted the fallen angel as he approached the bed and I couldn’t help the relieved sigh that escaped.

“Jesus, Lucifer, don’t- don’t scare me like that!” I snapped.

Lucifer snorted and lifted his hands in the air, as if in surrender, as he sat beside me.

There was the strangest mixture of warmth and coolness radiating from him as his thigh pressed against mine. It was honestly soothing. As I let go of the fear and irritation of being startled from my sleep, I definitely didn’t sneak a look at the massive difference between our legs, nor imagine how good it would feel to sit on his thigh... A shudder ran up my spine at the mental image. I quickly kicked myself back into reality and shot him a weak smile.

“So, uh, what’s going on?” I asked.

The corners of his mouth curled up into a little smirk and he bumped his shoulder into mine.

“I figured if you were gonna be here for a while, I should at least give you a tour of the place! Unless you wanna be stuck in here alone, of course-”

“No, I mean, yes, please! That would be great,” I sighed happily.

Just the thought of being alone again for god knows how long was enough to make my heart twist. I was so used to being surrounded by the hubbub of the shop that just these last few hours of solitude were enough to last me a lifetime.

Brows knitting in thought, I let my gaze travel around the room in search of some sign of my phone before a groan escaped.

“The shop! How long have I been down here? Fuck, they’re probably sick with worry. I haven’t even been able to do the orders! Everything is going to-”

Cool fingers rested over my mouth and instantly shut me up, my heart leaping into my throat. Eyes darting up to meet his, I gave him a confused look to which he simply grinned.

“Already took care of that. Your little monkeys were sent a text letting them know you were sick and that you’d be closed until you were better. Now, if you promise you’re done with your little freakout, I’ll let you go.”

Part of me wanted to rebel just to keep his hands on me for a while longer, but logic won out in the end and I gave him a little nod.

“So you have my phone?” I asked.

“Yup,” he said, popping the p cutely, “But you’re not getting it back until I’m certain you’re one hundred percent healthy and able to go back. Capiche?”

The look I gave him only earned a bigger grin in response, telling me all I needed to know about arguing with him.

With a sigh, I said, “Fine. You win. Show me… hell?”

“Gladly!”

He stood and offered up an elbow, which I happily took. As my hand slid into his elbow, forcing me to stand all the much closer to him, I couldn’t stop the little smile and butterflies that followed.

“Oh, and a word of advice?” he said as he opened the door, “I wouldn’t run off alone. I’m still trying to get things in order and some of these droogs think they can disobey.”

That sounded just lovely. Thankfully, I knew I was safe at Lucifer’s side, but it did worry me for any time I was alone in the room in the near future. Tightening my grip on his arm, I scooted slightly closer as we passed a pack of people in the hall and attempted to school my features into something other than fear.

“I wasn’t planning on it. I trust you to keep me safe,” I told him honestly.

After what Asmodeus put me through? There was no way in hell- ha- that I would chance getting caught by some of his loyalists.

“Good. Now, do you have anything in particular you’d like to see, or avoid?” he asked.

After thinking for a moment, I replied, “I’d like to avoid anything too… gory. Or anything involving torture with everything that happened.”

I hoped he didn’t think me weak for that but, even if he did, there was no way I’d want to see it even if I hadn’t been through that. Horror movies with fake gore, I could stand. The thought of seeing a person tortured in real life though, made my stomach ache.

He stopped suddenly and my gaze was drawn up to him in confusion, only to find him staring intently down at me.

“I wouldn’t take you there even if you hadn’t said anything. You’re too good for that.”

Somehow, the way he spat out the word good made it sound like an insult. I tried not to let it bother me and instead flashed him a warm smile.

“I appreciate that. Um, maybe we could see the throne room? I got to see some of it before but I’d like to get a better look at it with you there,” I offered.

“Good choice, princess. I’ve got some business to attend to there anyway,” he praised giddily.

My heart swelled with happiness. This was going well so far.

“I have a silly question,” I sighed after a few quiet moments.

“What’s that?” he replied.

Looking up at him, I asked something I’d been dying to ask since last night.

“Tell me about yourself? I mean, whatever you feel comfortable sharing of course. I was never really a religious person. I don’t know much about Christianity, much less what is actually true, because you don’t seem like the evil, fire, and brimstone that the bible made you out to be.” Apparently, I had hit a nerve because he suddenly went stiff and his jaw clenched hard. I almost backpedaled and apologized for asking such a personal question, but then his eyes met mine.

“You really want to know?” he asked quietly.

I nodded and said, “Whatever you want to share with me. I feel you know so much about me and I know nothing about you.”

With a heavy sigh, he began talking. The halls were confusing and tiring to walk, probably because my body was still recovering, but it was easy to ignore with the conversation flowing between us. It was enthralling to hear him talk about it all; heaven, GOD who was apparently a giant dick, the angels, his fall, and his reasoning. I had expected something chaotic but I was slowly coming to understand the sad reality of it all. Unfortunately, we came to a large set of doors before he was finished, and I knew the conversation was put aside for now when he waved the doors open to show the throne room.

“It’s much brighter in here now,” I mumbled in surprise.

“Yeah, Asmodeus was one for theatrics,” he chuckled, “Come, sit while I call the guys down.”

To my surprise, he led me straight to the throne and gestured me forward.

“Wait, you want me to sit here?!” I gasped in disbelief, “But, where are you going to sit?”

“I mean, you could always just sit in my lap but I prefer to stand when addressing the idiots,” he said with a wink.

Face warming, I nodded in understanding before carefully sitting on the chair. It was much easier to see all the intricate carvings up close and I couldn’t help but marvel at the craftsmanship of it all. It was gorgeous.

Lucifer snapped and suddenly there were four being in the center of the room. He walked around behind the throne and leaned against the back as he started talking.

“Updates, people. Where are we on finding the Losechesters?”

The group looked at each other nervously before the only female-presenting one spoke up.

“We haven’t heard anything from them, sir. We tried looking-”

“You’re telling me no one has found them yet?” Lucifer bit out gruffly.

Eyes widening in shock, I watched the group of four demons before us practically cowered to the ground. He hadn’t even threatened them yet and they were kneeling, preparing for the worst.

“How?! There are thousands of you idiots and you can’t find two little hunters?!”

“S-Sir, if- if I may?” the shortest one of the four pled, “They seem to have gone off the grid. Even the other hunters haven’t heard from them, and there is no love lost between them, as you know.”

Lucifer scoffed and my eyes found his tall form as he stalked around to stand as a wall between the demons and me, hand lifted in the air in the form of a snap symbolically.

“How many does it take to pass along a message, princess?” Lucifer asked suddenly.

Caught like a deer in headlights, I stammered out in surprise, “Uh, o-one?”

“Hmm, you heard the lady.”

There was a loud chorus of pleas before he snapped and there was a big billow of black ash across the floor. I tried to peek out around him and found only the shortest of the four left.

Oh.

“Run along now and spread it to the rest of the goon squad that, if progress isn’t made soon, they’re just as replaceable.”

“Y-Yes- Yes sir!” the demon squeaked out.

I couldn’t deny that it was slightly amusing to see a full-grown man, a demon no less, act like a scolded child. My amusement was placated when Lucifer suddenly spun around, leaning down and pinning me into the throne with a hand on either arm. Fuck, he really liked doing that, and he looked damn good doing it.

“Now that that’s done, where would you like to go next, doll?”

…

“Lucifer?” I called out nervously.

I was almost certain I was in the throne room again, except this time it was dark and empty- save for myself and a mysteriously shadowed figure upon the chair. As if on cue, a light blinked on above the throne, and there sat Lucifer in all his glory; One leg propped up on the right arm while he rested his elbow on the left, lounging about as if he had no care in the world.

“I knew you’d find me eventually,” he cooed warmly, “Now, come here.”

Swallowing thickly, I nodded once and walked across the floor. The closer I got, the faster my heart raced. Was this finally happening? Were my dreams finally going to come true?

He snapped, pointing to the floor before him as he spun to sit properly in the chair, and I wasted no time dropping to my knees. A hand in my hair drew me closer until my knees pressed against the cold concrete holding the throne up.

“You are just an obedient little thing, aren’t you?” he mused.

I nodded in answer but my movements were halted as pain shot through my scalp, his fingers gripping tight enough to jerk a choked gasp from my throat.

“Answer when you are spoken to.”

“Y-Yes, Lord Lucifer,” I breathed out.

Despite my best efforts, lust shone through painfully obvious in my tone and my face heated warm at his chuckle.

“You’d do anything I ask you to,” he sighed happily.

Again, I almost nodded but this time I thought better of it, before whispering, “Yes Lord Lucifer, please tell me what you want.”

My eyes snapped open but, rather than the irritation I had begun to expect from being woken up from such a good dream, I felt uncertainty. What had woken me up? I could feel from the gritty burning in my eyes that I hadn’t slept very long, despite being exhausted from the full day of exploring with Lucifer.

“You know, when I heard you praying to me, I expected trouble, maybe some of the lower lifeforms messing with you. But this? This is so much better.”

That voice. Jerking upright, I instantly spotted Lucifer leaning up against the dark wardrobe across the room. He looked a vision. I couldn’t help the way my gaze followed his movements as he crossed his arms over his chest with a smirk. Gone was his tan jacket, leaving him in a simple white t-shirt that exposed his thick muscles delectably, and my thighs clenched traitorously at the sight.

It took a few moments but I finally registered what he had said and shot him a confused look.

“Wait, what?” I asked, “I wasn’t pray-”.

My dream. Realization hit hard and it took everything in me not to sink in on myself. How the fuck did that count as praying?!

His smirk widened as he lifted away from his perch and crossed the room just to stop a mere foot or two in front of me. He had to know what he was doing, and how the current position put my eyes in a very intimate place, not that I was complaining.

A hand ran into my hair before gently tangling in my curls and drawing my head back. I didn’t dare resist. How could I?

“Lucifer, I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

My words were cut off as he suddenly shoved me back onto the bed. I wasn’t given the chance to react before he was over me, elbows on either side of my head and hips dangerously close to the apex of my thighs. It felt like my heart stopped the instant I felt his cool breath across my neck.

“I’ve tried really fucking hard to be good, you know?” he breathed softly again my skin, “I tried to pretend you were just some random hairless ape. Tried to ignore this damn soulmate pull, but it’s useless. You don’t understand how damn hard it’s been to resist you, princess. The way you look at me with those sweet doe eyes, the way you smell, the way you trust me with touching you- Fuck, I just want to destroy you!”

Fear and excitement battled in my heart as I felt his lips and teeth rest against my throat. But rather than bite me, as I had expected, he simply placed a soft kiss before running his nose up toward my ear.

“S-Soulmate?” I asked timidly.

“Mmhmm,” he groaned as he finally rutted his hips against mine, “Even without it, I think it’d be hard to resist you. You’re just so… pure. You’re like the opposite of everything I am and-”

“I’m not a virgin though.”

He snorted out a laugh before pressing another kiss in the hollow spot below my ear, spurring a weak mewl from my throat.

“You know what I mean, Emery,” he said, voice thick with lust, “You’re kind, caring, charitable, trusting. So damn beautiful.”

Gods, the way my name sounded coming off his tongue. It was swoon worthy. I tried to argue but all my words were lost in a sea of bliss as he rolled his hips against my core again. Instinctively my hands bunched up in his t-shirt at his waist and pulled him down again. It felt so fucking good. Too good. Part of me feared I’d end up climaxing before we could even get to the good part, like some kind of loser; The other part of me begged for that, just to take the edge off the heat consuming my veins.

“Lucifer, please,” I begged breathlessly, arching in search of relief that only he could provide, “I need- fuck!”

The burn of his teeth in my neck sent a wave of pleasure from head to toe. One hand came up to curl in his blonde locks, hold him close in hopes of more of the sweet pain, and the other sought flesh under his shirt.

He let out a low grunt and sighed, “What are you doing to me, princess?”

The ripple of his muscles flexing under my palm only increased my desire for more so I did just that. Tugging at his shirt, I drew it up to his shoulders until he finally lifted up and reached behind to tug it off.

“Holy fuck,” I whispered as my eyes greedily took in the sight above me.

I couldn’t resist running my hands up his abdomen when he stretched. The way his muscles flexed taut before relaxing was rewarding beyond measure. He had what could be considered a slight dad bod, stomach soft when relaxed with broad and strong shoulders and firm arms. There was no denying the power in his body, angelic presence or not, and it was beautiful; he was beautiful. As I watched the way his body reacted to my touches, my need began to fall to the back of my mind. I wanted nothing more than to please and worship the angel above me first.

Was that sacrilegious? Fuck, who cared!

My nails left faint red lines down his stomach before my hands found his jeans.

“Uh-uh, not yet.”

Without even touching me, he forced my hands back and above my head, and I found myself unable to move them no matter how hard I tried. When I looked to him for answers, he only smirked before leaning down once more.

“How-”

“I’ve got plenty of tricks up my sleeve, doll,” he purred, “I could do things to you that you couldn’t even imagine in your wildest dreams.”

My eyes fluttered shut and a soft groan left my lips in disbelief. It was too daunting to stare straight into those soul-searching blues when he said such things.

“Tell me what you want,” he demanded softly, “I need to hear it. Consent means everything to us- to me, Emery.”

He was really trying to kill me, wasn’t he? Did he understand how hard it was for me to accept this was even happening, that to say it out loud would make it almost too… real?

“Unless you want this to stop.”

“No!” I snapped, eyes flying open in fear, “Please, don’t stop. Just- Just give me a second to acclimate, okay?”

He said nothing but the fact he didn’t immediately leave was reassuring. Swallowing hard, I pulled against my bonds and was allowed one hand free. I grabbed one of his hands before drawing it over to my lips and the way his eyes darkened when I kissed his thumb sent another roll of heat through my core.

“I want this. I want to touch you and- and you to- touch me,” I stammered out with burning cheeks.

How was I supposed to be okay with asking an angel to touch me? I didn’t deserve it. I was nothing compared to him and yet here he was, indulging my deepest desires.

“Good girl,” he murmured.

A keening moan escaped before I could stop it and my hand was jerked back into position, locked in invisible bonds once more. He snapped his fingers once and I was suddenly aware of the cool temperature of the room against my skin.

Did he just- Sure enough, when I looked down, I found my shirt and bra gone, leaving me just in my skirt and panties. I wasn’t even given the chance to react upon my embarrassment with the way he attacked my neck.

“Fuck!” I gasped out needily.

The burn of his teeth felt almost too much but then the caress of his cool tongue across the wound made it so much better. It was unbearable, having to lay there and let him touch me while being unable to reciprocate. I wanted nothing more than to be able to prove to him how good I could be.

“You need to tell me if something is too much,” he said between gentle bites down my throat to my collarbone, “I don’t want to hurt you. I’ve got a pretty good grasp on the human pain threshold but this is all new to me. Some of Nick’s memories help but, well, that’s not the same as first-hand experience, which I have very little of.”

In the middle of my nod, I froze, brain slowly catching up to what he had said. Did he mean… Was Lucifer a virgin? Forcing my eyes open, I caught his gaze and timidly asked him such.

He smirked and said, “Never felt the need to. Another great thing about being an angel, no sex drive. Had an encounter once but it wasn’t really anything to write home about.”

“But then, why-”

At that, his eyes darkened once more and he leaned in close, lips hovering mere centimeters from mine. I waited impatiently but didn’t dare interrupt.

“You’re different. Maybe it’s because I met you when my grace was so low I was nearly human, or maybe it’s because you’re one of Nick’s possible soulmates. No matter the reason, I’m drawn to you, princess. You make me want to do things- experience things- I’ve never even considered.”

Shivers ran across my being at his admission. I made a mental note to ask more about the Possible? soulmate thing later.

“Which means,” he continued on seamlessly, “I need to know what works, what you like.”

“O-Okay, so far, you’re doing amazing,” I admitted softly.

“Flattery gets you everywhere,” he shot back with a wink.

As he retreated to his previous line of exploration, my eyes clamped shut once more. Maybe I’d be able to handle seeing a literal angel touching me in the future, but for now, my brain couldn’t handle it mixed with the sensations he was evoking.

My brain emptied of everything other than little begs and chants of his name as one hand cupped my breast. His calloused skin felt divine against my sensitive flesh, my back arching into his touch for more. Round and round he circled around my breast, slowly coming closer and closer to where I needed him most. When he finally ran a rough thumb over my hardened nipple, it tore a pathetic whimper from my lips. I would have been mortified if he hadn’t moaned in response.

“Look at you,” he breathed out quietly, “Father help me.”

Before I could respond, his mouth was on my untouched nipple and all words died on my tongue, only his name sounding in the silent room. Waves of pleasure rocked through my core as his teeth grazed my tender flesh, jumping up in intensity when he started sucking hard.

No matter how much I tried to relieve the ache between my thighs against his hips, it wasn’t enough to satiate the need for him. It was hard to be patient when it’d been years since I’d had any kind of sexual release other than my own hand, and even more so when no one had ever taken the time to explore my body like he was.

“Lucifer, please, more!” I practically cried.

He hmmed lowly in his throat and released his hold on my breast, hand skirting down my belly to my skirt. I was suddenly thankful for the high-waisted skirt covering the trouble area of my stomach, but it was gone as soon as I’d thought it, his hand dipping beneath the fabric and caressing the soft curve of my belly. It was hard to focus on that once his fingers continued on to my panties, my body nearly collapsed in on itself.

I wanted to cry when he hesitated, popping off my nipple with a groan.

“This is okay?” he asked.

“Yes, please just-”

Head slamming back against the bed, my throat constricted in a silent scream as his fingers finally pressed between my lips.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck-

My heart lurched in shock when his mouth was suddenly against my jawline, pressing open-mouthed kisses so close yet so far away. The dual sensation created a sinful mixture of want and need.

“You’re so wet,” he gasped, shock evident in his voice, “Is that because of me?”

“F-Fuck, yes,” I whined back.

Hips arching into his hand, I helped guide him until his fingers brushed against my clit and my hands instinctively jerked against the binds.

“Here?” he asked as he cautiously repeated the motion.

I tried to answer but it was too hard to speak, pleasure already growing with leaps and bounds to the point my brain was mush. I managed a nod and a frantic, “yes” before collapsing back against the bed with a whine. It was too much and yet I never wanted anything more. Each circle of his fingers brought about new levels of bliss, edging me closer and closer to that final ledge while my lips spewed unending praises.

My heart felt like it was going to explode when he suddenly licked up the shell of my ear and his hand left its previous pursuit to slip further down. The instant his fingers found my opening, I abandoned all humility and spread my thighs wider, begging him to continue.

“Yes, before you ask, yes,” I rushed out hastily, “Please!”

Lucifer let out a husky chuckle that sent my hairs on end and his teeth found purchase in my earlobe, fingers carefully sliding in at the same time. Whether spurred on by previous memories or instinct alone, his thumb came up to my clit and resumed the gentle circles as his fingers began a slow rhythm.

“Such a quick learner, good girl,” he praised lowly, “Do you want your hands back now?”

I nodded frantically and suddenly my binds were gone. Without a second thought, I grabbed a handful of his hair and drew him into a hungry kiss. There was a moment where he froze as if in shock, but thankfully it passed quickly before he kissed me back eagerly. It was all teeth and tongue and, though messy, I knew never wanted it any other way again.

I could feel myself crying when I drew back for breath. My orgasm was so close I could practically taste it.

“Don’t stop, please,” I whimpered between heavy breaths, “So close.”

The growl he let out was inhuman and devastatingly delicious and then his mouth was on mine once more.

“Do it, let go for me, princess,” he grunted between ravenous kisses.

His motions grew rough, fingers thrusting hard and faster but never losing their rhythm as I bucked into his hand. It was impossible to control my body as I chased that high, and when I finally felt that peak rushing forth, my hands frantically found his shoulders to keep some grip on reality.

“Oh god, oh fuck-”

Lucifer let out a snarl and snapped, “Don’t use his name. It’s not his fingers that are inside you. Are they? Try again! Tell me! Who is touching you? Who is pleasing you? Hmm?!”

“I’m- I’m sor- sorry, Luci-Lucifer!”

“That’s right, princess, you’re MINE!”

That last little barrier snapped and, for just a little moment in time, it felt like the world stopped. And then it all came crashing back down with a scream of his name. I could feel the tears streaming down my face as I jerked him down and buried my face into his neck, sobbing out in relief and ecstasy as he continued to finger fuck me through the torrential bliss. It didn’t take long for his touch to become overstimulating and my thighs instinctively clamped shut to stop him.

“Fuck,” he hissed quietly as he gently extracted his hand, “I think I get it now.”

Though thoroughly exhausted, I managed to open my eyes and give him a questioning look.

“Sex, the urge behind it,” he explained.

I couldn’t help the snort that escaped and the dopey smile that spread across my lips.

“You haven’t even seen the best part,” I told him.

Grabbing his hand, I gently pulled him fully back over me and gathered up all my strength to lean up and kiss him. Thankfully he made it easy by leaning down to meet me. These were much softer, much calmer, but no less passionate. Despite my body demanding rest, I knew we were nowhere near done, if the hardness pressing against my thigh was any indication.

“Give me a second to recover but don’t go anywhere,” I murmured, “I want to repay the favor.”

“Are you sure?” he asked.

If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was nervous. Catching his gaze, I rested my palm over his cheek and traced gentle designs across his scruff.

“I’m certain. I could literally want nothing more in the world right now.”

[zumpietoo]

Oh the Irony....

And perfect timing!!! Cuz I'm SURE you sent similar to the BB with their latest waybackmachinings??? (to say nothing of, WTF do you care what I entitle or post it---tho, I do have nu inspiration--and I posted all kinds of positive Cole stuff just this AM):

Oh and to say nothing of, sure enough, I called EXACTLY what your transparent asses are butthurt about....

Ah yes, we begin with assorted racism, elitism and lookism....umm...she lives an easily drivable distance from NYC AND for all we know Mommeee sent her a ticket (that she grifted for freeeee!!!). Plus who knew A) I was an evvvolll Poor? B) being a Poor was a sin?

At least I know US geography.....even tho Silly is in Georgia, which is also a relatively drivable distance to NYC....so you'd think she'd know that, too....maybe Silly is Amab? She's in 'Bama and was remarkably ignorant about basic US geography....especially since she taught school, in a grade where that would be part of the curriculum.

Ahhh.....I fuckin' knew it! They're pissed that nobody wants to doubledate/be besties with CabanaPee for realsiessss.....

But SweatBoi will react like a pissy little bitch, which, ofc, makes him the awesomest awesome that ever awesomed!!! Perhaps Silly/janASS should look up, "I didn't want to be part of your stupid clubhouse, anywaaayyy!!!"/sour grapes?

Oh yes, bad grammar BB member (Silly foaming at the mouth), PP does indeed gives a MANY shit(s) about everything Cole's doing. BTW, since he and Ari have been together for nearly 3 years, live together and probably will eventually get married....I think it moved past "hooking up" quite some time ago.

That would be Peepster and CB. And FB. And Austyn. And Charli. And whomever she slipped a few extra $$$ to at The Box.

Meanwhile....while Cole HAD already stated he'd be attending many parties for Halloween (versus just one, while beating a very ded, now revealed as fully AN ILLUSION(ary) horse).....considering we had CB yet again cosplaying Cole and PP being with CB entirely because of that....if Cole DID "run away" (no), moar like "from his stalkers".....cuz I most assuredly did NOT notice any "hotties"....

Dude, she posed for group pics with Cabana Pee....maybe she just knows an asshole when she sees one. And to the OG anon----what was that about "almost a month ago"??? You're here still droning on about CB cosplaying Cole the first time. Which is why PP's with him (and the ONLY reason).

MM is ninety billion times prettier than PP, actually a better actress, has been with her BF for way longer, he's a bigger fucking deal than CB could even dream of and she's with him cuz she legit loves him, versus making him pretend to be Walking Tat....

Ummm....it would be two words, "dumb ass", not one....ignorant dullard, however......it's as if FB legit likes Cole better than PP (let alone Sweatboi) even if PP lets him fuck her from time to time.

And not "at", IN....and Fancee Nicola also visited Cole on set, were roomies with him during quaranteen, etc....plus, no, dude....PP doesn't "always support him".....Cole (and MM) were at FB's premiere, Cole made a speshul trip to DC to attend a different premiere of FB's back in 2019.....PP was also in NYC then and didn't bother herself.

And why would he "support PP's nu relationship"? He and PP aren't really friends (they're sidepieces, at best), especially anymoar and CB is a nobody asshole.....and his wife hates PP (and probably Sweatboi)....

However, I do love how y'all are admitting it, even as you attempt to twist it. Plus, again....did the OG anon talk to them about shit in the past?

Why TF would they "feel pity for Cole"? He remains 90 billion times richer and moar famous than all the rest of them combined....

Plus, PP's production company is dick (you really need to stop with that idiocy).....so has Cole (and is legit friends with Alisters), and, again, I don't see PP leading any successful theatricals....she scabbed a student project for her cult for less than scale cuz she needed $$$ that fucking desperately.

Love how they ignore how Cole spent the strike at A list fashion events in all Europe, while PP did a purse party.....and attends other A list events? PP? Does tiktoks with CB's loser friends (who still hate her), now....

And lastly....even if true? Doesn't matter. Cole could easily fade into obscurity and just sit around counting his $$$---PP remains a slutty, dimwitted, talent-free bimbo, up to her eyeballs in debt....and, again, then they wouldn't have tried the sad little threepeat costumey....

[kayla-crazy-stuffs]

Ready you are. You for questions have I!!!!! KAYLA

Now read that backwards :3

Ok ok ok

So was looking at tiny Mer au and found the post about Dream and Foolish. Are they related 👀👀👀

And because I’m fairly certain they are, is Puffy apart of your au and if yes, what is she????

Also it seems you like to paint George as a Villain for a lot of your aus. Just wondering what your reasons are behind that. (I actually think it’s really cool since George isn’t usually utilised as a villian against dream often)

For your Fairy au, do hunters exist in your universe? If so, who would the hunters be and what kind of uses would fairies hold in the eyes of a hunter?

Annnnnddd who and how do the characters come about breaking the language barrier? I know there’s a way to break it but you said it was rare. I wanna know!!!!!!

Surfer dream au, ha suck it George! Serves you right for tormenting Dream. However what changes George’s perspective on humans in the end? And when it does change, what happens with Dream and George’s relationship? I can imagine the tension would be high.

Also, any other characters you want to add to the surfer dream Au that you have yet to add yet? If yes, who and what are they?

Random side questions

Any recommendations for fics you love that you think everyone should read? (I want more reading material lol)

A gt movie you adore

Your favourite Christmas movie and/or Carol

Something you’d like to receive for Christmas

Thank you for answering and here’s many lollipops as thanks for answering 🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭

Woooooo! I received Questions!!! >:D Thank you Becky!!!

Yeah, Foolish and Dream are related in tiny mer au; Foolish is a shark mer that is also a sizeshifter but unlike Bad that he's human sized mer and can grow to 60ft tall mer, Foolish is a 4'5 inches tall mer that can only grow to human size.

Also for Puffy, I have no intention to add her to the au, since I'm not used to draw or write about her :')

I don't know in which more au's did I make George a villain but yeah, I kinda want to see George being a villain against Dream sometimes, since usually the villain is Dream, so I wanted to change that :]

Well, actually Fairy au is like the au that has a bit of angst at the beginning (because injuries at all) but is supposed to be a fluff au so I didn't add hunters to it :)

Well, for the language barrier; Karl likes to read a lot so one day, he finds a book where they talk about the "magic forest" and found a section were it was specifically focused on one mysterious berry that no one know its color; there are a lot of them, they have the same form but different colors; all of them are mortal if they're eaten, so that's why fairies stopped trying to find the actual one that breaks the barrier. But what will happen when Karl founds one of that berries and accidentally eat it, just to be able to understand the fairies not much later? >:]

Quackity probably reluctantly hands George something he really likes, saying it's from Dream, who wanted Quackity to give it to him since he didn't want to get anywhere near George. It would also change when Quackity reveals that Dream is actually only 16 and that he has only been trying to kill a kid...

George and Dream's relationship? Well, George would actually try to get closer to Dream but the human would only panic trying to get away from him, hiding behind Sapnap, Quackity or Punz (yeah, Punz and him are friends when this happens), but time to time Dream starts trusting George (slowly but he starts). Also because probably Sapnap and Quackity told him that George is trying to change and apologize to him.

Well, I'm also going to add Foolish to this au too :]

Recommendations?? Uhh... Right now I can't think of any but I'll tell you when I got some :']

Hmmm, Arrietty and Thumbelina (1994) :D

Christmas movie... I can't remember if I have seen any... And Carol; "25 de Diciembre, fun fun fun" (yeah, Spanish Carol UuU)

Cosplays and anime things, any type of things >:]

Thanks for the lollipops Becky!! :D

Have some cookies 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪

[random-bi-writer]

My Reaction to Thanks To Them

Took me two days to finish my projects first before watching this but it is definetely worth the antagonising wait.

Spoilers for those who haven’t watched it yet.

NO. WHY WOULD YOU START WITH THAT?! FROG DAMMIT, IM ALREADY CRYING AND IT’S ONLY BEEN THREE SECONDS

And once again, Anne made me laugh.

Wait...there are sponges that aren’t yellow?

Get Some Therapy Challenge: Failed.

Nah, that british gay man who dresses like a straight person ain’t human to begin with.

Goddamit, of course he shows up.

I see a picture of what seems to be Luz slapping a cake on her dad’s face.

Child, you need to get out more often.

Why would they freak out- oh. right, Abominations...

I wonder if Disney let a full season, we would have a more in depth scene about Vee meeting the others for the first time instead of this.

Hallway of pictures. There’s the dad throwing baby Luz in the air (that explains a lot about Luz) Chat Noir cosplay, 

Hate that I can see the dad’s full face, but it’s too fucking small for me to stare at.

Nevermind.

Pfft. I’m sorry, I had to rewatch this 5 times to make sure I’m not watching a fanmade amv instead of the episode. Also nice to include Hooty photobombing.

The amount of sadness with the drawings is just...

Designs. Gus, yes. Willow, maybe. Amity, maybe less dark colors and ditch the hat. Hunter, goofy boy.

Mirabel Madrigal.

VEE! MY BABY BOY!

Damn, that explains the haircut. Still miss the ahoge, though.

They’re so cute, especially Amity, I want to pinch her cheeks.

I prefer the non-romance cute. Lumity is so cute and wholesome that it’s disgusting.

Aww, the boys are having fun.

Willow looks like a mom with her hair down.

Is that spanish, I hear? I’m so proud.

I thought you were over that.

So Willow likes photography now.

Aww, Hooty’s there.

Vee is more babey when he speaks spanish.

Lmao. You’re gonna have three more kids once you meet King and the Twins. Maybe four, depending on the Collector. Or five, since Eda is kinda of a child sometimes. Wow, you’re gonna be busy.

Wouldn’t people find it suspicous to see four kids walking around town during school hours? Why aren’t they going to school, then again, it would cost a lot.

Babeys.

Luz, for the love of all things holy, get some therapy.

Pfft. Luz what the heck?

Aww, it’s nice to see other humans liking Luz...that better not be a prank...

Damn, imagine if Luz lost her dad from a car crash, this scene would have been really something.

Ugh, gross.

Dang. Nice, Hunter.

Babey Boy.

The back cover looks gay.

Flashbacks? Nice.

For some reason, I’m thinking of Marcy.

Oh, so it’s a nightmare.

Manny Noceda. Am I getting that right?

I’m gonna be honest, I have no idea what I should say about Camila’s nightmare.

Shit. I know this a serious moment, but look at the picture of Camila and Vee being cute together. Probably the last thing I should focus on.

You know that feeling where you feel like something’s bad is going to happen? I’m getting that from the egg.

Oh, god. That is disgusting and horrifying.

Hunter, no.

LMAO, Amity’s face!

Lmao, the Huntlow shippers are getting fed

Belos is gonna show up when Hunter’s alone, isn’t he?

God dammit, why am I always right? Can’t I be wrong for a change?

Lmao, Willow.

Are they watching Amphibia?

Gus is afraid of firelights. Amity is a mood with the circles.

WOLF! TO BE LIKE KING!

Siblings!

Is the shadow fucking necesarry

Luz looks weird smiling like that.

Wait, that black haired actress looks like Luz.

NO

Lmao, that’s saying it midly.

Huh, both of the siblings eyes glowed blue.

Fucking hell, he’s inside of him.

Damn, they went hard at the animation again.

Oh damn, having a basilisk on your team really is good.

AHH THAT WAS CLOSE. TOO CLOSE!

No...no...No! Hunter and Flapjack deserve to be happy together!

Lumity call back, I don’t remember which episode..

Aww...I thought Vee would be coming.

Lmao, Vee.

So Thanks to Them is just Season 3A jumbled together.

Wait...Thanks to Them....Thanks to Disney...LMAO

[void-botanist]

🖊 for anyone in the fourth android? :0

Oh boy that's so many options. I changed my mind at least five times about who to talk about, because I'm thinking about at least five of them at every moment. But I finally settled on Anni.

As I'm restructuring the beginning of TFA I'm adding in more scenes with her, which I'm happy about, even though I keep second guessing how good I am at writing from her POV. But I enjoy writing about her putting on her headphones (they're cool headphones with light-up stripes) and one of her like twenty curated playlists and getting in the coding zone. Approaching fictional android problems with the same kinds of strategies and frustrations that I have when I code. And having an excellent dynamic with her primary coworker at the bookstore, Urma (they/them), who is a (human) cryptid with a taste for this world's equivalent of any peach-flavored alcohol and the daily newspaper crossword (for solving, not imbibing). Anni spends a lot of time with Zel in this book, obviously, and I'm slowly figuring out how to show what their dynamic is, partly by showing everything around it (family, friends, jobs, etc.). And I am so excited for when I eventually get to the point of writing Anni having "gossip hour" with her older sister Halli (she/her) and younger brother Brandon (he/they) when she goes home for solstice. After a day's happenings they can all pile into someone's bedroom and speak of their dark secrets, such as "do you know where they store the solstice lights the rest of the season???" (Bran knows. He works for the city) and "I think I'm getting serious about Zel. should I be getting serious about Zel? is Zel getting serious about me?? is it too soon to ask??? Halli you're engaged please advise me how to gay correctly????" (Halli is engaged. in a beautiful t4t sapphic romance. and betrothed too I guess).

Also, I remembered that in an earlier draft of TFA it was important to the plot that Anni used to be really into cosplay, because Dez swiped some of her stuff to attempt to pass as human while he ran away. I kinda want to explore that side of her even though I don't think it's super directly relevant to this draft of TFA. Did the cosplay stuff just sort of fade into the background because she got into other stuff? Did she get frustrated with it for some reason? Did Bran do duo costumes with her all the time and were they always extremely cute? (That one is obviously a yes.) I also wonder what kinds of cosplays she would do. It's probably the one area of her life where she dresses in colors that are not primarily blue. Maybe she got into cosplay because of Bran, who got into it because he wanted an excuse to dress up and look cool, and Halli could connect him with her community theatre friends for sharing/making costume pieces. Anni and Bran used to play her favorite MMO together, but while Anni wants to play the game more or less as intended, with all the grinding and gearing and guilds that entails, Bran just wants to take in the world, find some shiny rocks, and do every possible sidequest (thinking about it in Breath of the Wild terms: "yeah it would be tough but I bet I could do a no Beasts speedrun" vs. "the Stone Talus on the Great Plateau is the most breathtaking and terrifying thing I've ever seen in my life. What do you mean there's 29 more"). So it was fun until he started being chronically underleveled and kind of lost interest in the game. So then they started cosplaying to have something related to do together? (I should clearly write more of these character rambles because I'm figuring stuff out.)

Anyway, Anni is fun, and I need to get her talking to Julian more and figure out what she knows about sailboats.

[thedeadestmeme]

**spoilers for BHNA season 6 (from episode 7-13)**

out of context reactions, a summary:

“what the fuck… what.”

“girl, you better be okay— oh, wHAT THE F—?!”

“i agree with the fanfic writers. if someone gave Deku a gun, this shit would’ve been over.”

[incomprehensible screeching]

“THAT’S MY SON! THAT’S MY FUCKING SON! aAAAAA!!!!”

“this is the sickest guy in all eternity. you, on the other hand—.”

[accidentally launches my remote into orbit] “SHOTO FUCKING TODOROKI???”

“suneater, my favorite son, you look so awkward at all times<33”

“they show my favorite boy and i can’t even see him fight?!! …i’m so sad, bois.”

“bRO, WHERE DID YOU—? nah, fuck it. he’s just weird like that.”

“deku,,, this is the worst steven universe cosplay i’ve ever seen. i’m so sorry.”

“i would, in fact, spend forever crying over my other favorite son, Bakugo Katsuki, and his attempts for amends. i think i will, actually.”

“bro, i’M GONNA CRY.”

[wordless screaming]

“mans is going feral.”

“the use of biting in this season— hell, this entire series is insane. honestly? i’m for it. biting is the most feral choice. it really shows their desperation to survive that they’ll revert to their most feral state. in conclusion, i think Deku should start biting off fingers as a power move from now on:))”

“…so like. how’d you lose your nose.”

“yeah, he’s saying a lot of words. but like. i have serious questions. like, how does being evil correlate with a lack of smell??”

“…is it a ‘hear no evil’, ‘see no evil’-type thing. bc he’s sure speaking a lot.”

“if i had a nickel for every noseless villain i’ve seen, i’d have two nickels.“

“…i feel like i’m witnessing two men that see this ragtag crew as a found family and they’re having to accept that their daughter has grown up. and it feels extra awkward bc i think only half the crew thinks like this. but like… maybe this is normal, ya know?”

[nodding] “ah, yes. lesbian culture.”

me, seeing Best Jeanist: bruh, he’s so slay. he’s so SLAY!!!

“bEST GIRL!👏BEST GIRL!👏BEST GIRL—!👏”

“…girl what. i’m. girl, you— i can’t even begin to explain how weird comparing him to being your brother is. like. it can be a valid feeling, but right now, it feels really weird.”

“i think i’m about to start ignoring this part of the plotline and focus on the toxic yuri of it all. i think that’s a valid response.”

“yEAHHH!!! YEAHHH!!!!!”

“[sighs] …i miss my non-toxic bisexuals, Tails.”

“eyyy, it’s mister daddy issues— oH FUCK. WAIT, NO—.”

“bestie, you are sooo Jason Todd/JD-coded, it hurts.”

“…he’s a theater major, ur honor.”

[stage-whispering] “…i don’t think he fact-checked all of his sources”

“i’m crying on the inside. like, really hard. i will be coping via so many fanfics later, it’s not even funny.”

“SLAYYYYYYYYYYY!!!”

“bro, you are so cool. your silly puns are so funny. i hate your hair, but you’re so slay that i’ll forgive it. i love you.”

“all these daddy issues… dude, i feel like i’m watching Demon Slayer all over again.”

“hold up— wHAT THE FUCK.”

“TELL HIM, SHOUTO! KICK HIS ASS!!!”

“mY SON!!!! MY SON MY SON MY SON MY SON!! MYSONMYSONMYSON mY SONNNNN!!!”

“bro i’m literally cryignsh”

“bAKUGOFAIFDHH GAHHH, THAT’S MY FUCKING SON!!!”

“YEAH!!! MIRIO, YOU’RE SO RIGHT!! IT’S A GOOD, SILLY NAME!!”

“…what the fuck. uh,,, tododeku win? [stares at Blackwhip: Froppy Style] ,,,at what cost...”

“girl, i love that Iida respected Bakugo’s entire hero name. he heard it two seconds ago and memorized it bc it felt like the respectful thing to do. he’s the best kid ever.”

“bonding with the crew: murder-style<333”

[sighing louder] “i miss Twice, Tails.”

“this entire crew is so loser-coded. a failed magician, an otaku, a yandere sim oc, Deadpool: Ultra Rare Copy Machine Edition, and Jason Todd — all banding together to work for the ultimate loser, Guy Who Somehow Has Even Worse Daddy Issues. that being said, i’ll always support the LGBTQ+ community<333”

“being so real, i really like Spinner and Compass and their desires for found family.”

“…Compass is so fucking cool, this is not fair.”

“bRO, NO. FUCK YOU. WHY IS HE HOT.”

“and quirk by quirk, Izuku Midoriya is slowly becoming Spiderman /jjj”

“nO. NO, COMPRESS, NO. BRO, YOU WERE SO HOT. NOOOOOO.”

“girl, i am… so sad. i am SO SAD.”

“bRO I JUST SAW ANOTHER GLIMPSE OF SUNEATER, WHY IS IT ONLY GLIMPSES. THIS IS THE FOURTH TIME. I MISS MY SON. I AM SCREAMING.”

if you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading. i am currently sobbing<333. i’ll be watching the rest now, but i figured i could liveblog all these thoughts in one whole post instead of spamming. i had too many thoughts to be able to open new posts shajfkf

[i-am-adlocked]

I was introverted (a coping mechanism) but I am actually an extrovert. Now I’m reverting back

Just a rant.

A timeline of significant moments that made me stop being an extrovert.

January 2021. I planned my 24th birthday two years prior. I made a group chat (gc) to inform everyone what I planned and why it’s important to me. And the gc will be updated if ever lockdown gets lifted.

November 2022. Two months prior to the bday, I informed the bday gc, and each circle’s gcs, to block their calendars. 40 replied they will. I asked those if they will join. They said yes. I booked a place to fit 40 people.

December 2022. 1st week. I started dming each of the 40 and to give me some information so I can send the formal physical invite I custom-made myself a year ago. It includes a stamp system, a letter for why they’re important to me, a map of the venue, a letter showing the details and program setting. The dm was the official RSVP. The letter was the advanced “thanks for celebrating me.”

I dmed them and put the first message as: Please reply in a week for my bday.

So even if they don’t read it, the preview would show when I needed a reply in a week so I can have the invites printed, enveloped, and sealed and mailed in the post office two weeks before my bday so they will receive it a week before my birthday.

Less than 10 replied within a day. Less than 10 informed me they will have to cancel within the week.

December 2022. 2nd week. The rest took this week to reply even though all of them read my message. They all said the same thing. “Give me a week to confirm my schedule.”

December 2022. 3rd week. They said the same thing. I ran out of time. Even if I get them printed in the shop which will last at least a day, then put them in envelopes which I would have sealed with wax, and then have them delivered to the post office myself… Delivery time takes two weeks. No time left.

A day before my birthday. Those 20+ people finally said they were gonna cancel.

January 2023. 1st half. 13 out of 40 came. I told the bar I didn’t need the whole venue anymore (fee was expensive) and thankfully they let me cancel the reservation for the whole venue the night before but we can still keep a reservation for the longest table in the bar. They can let in walk-ins.

So we couldn’t use the lights and speakers the way I planned to, to be considerate of other customers. No crazy party.

One of my high-school-friends wore a striped shirt. When I specifically said to only wear plain black from top to bottom (except for shoes) and he said he couldn’t find one and he was too lazy to buy new clothes. Note that in another birthday a year later he willingly bought a set of clothes for their color theme.

The other high-school-friend wore a cosplay. It was mostly black save for the white button-down, grey vest, and brown details on the hat and sleeves. But he asked permission a month prior if he can do it and I gave him the go signal.

I couldn’t do the funeral picture I wanted. I was gonna lay on one of the bar’s areas and have all of them surround me in all black with the sunglasses I was supposed to give them if they had the invites stamped. No sunglasses. No more reservation to that part of the venue and there were already other customers. No funeral pic.

I said fine. Let’s have a normal bday pic. One of the girls put on a yellow jacket and when I asked if she can take it off for the pic because I’m the only one who should have color (I have a red blazer on). She said it’s too cold.

Regarding the invites. It had to be mailed because the theme was “formal vs informal” wherein everything is formal: the invites, the clothes (there was a color theme which was black), how to enter the venue (stamp system where they have to get the circle with the logo of the bday group chat (which i also edited) stamped so they can get the free sunglasses.

A little minor theme was that it was my “funeral”. The last year of my first quarter. The beginning of my death as a first quarter person.

The informal: it’s actually in a bar (they know it’s a bar since the letter invite would include the venue time and all that crap). And we were gonna get hella wasted and the inside will be like a hella club.

So I was deeply disappointed.

January 2023. 2nd half. I planned my 25th birthday to have a “reminiscing the childhood” theme because even though I really wanted a Spongebob birthday, I was unemployed and had no funds.

So the plan was to go to my house, watch a horror movie in pajamas, and just be kids again. Because I’m finally in my quarter life crisis.

July 2023. Out with my high-school-friends and when I was on my phone, they started talking about what they were gonna do about one of our friend’s birthday next month. The same friend who was my longest friend out of all of them since we met even before high school. We were friends since the first grade. I realized he didn’t invite me because they were talking about the venue. I didn’t do anything wrong. We didn’t fight. He just… didn’t invite me. It was a roadtrip.

August 2023. The whole group was there except me. I found out my girl bff was invited (but that’s cos she became my boy high school bff’s girlfriend after I told them to get together) because of a picture posted as they met up which my other friend posted and I texted my girl bff why I wasn’t invited if she knew. She said she didn’t know I wasn’t. She was quite surprised I wasn’t there. She assumed I was.

December 2023. I made a new gc and only invited 25 people. The same ones plus a few who came last year. Some couldn’t go. But around 18-20 confirmed. I kept asking for confirmation every week of December. They all said yes. I informed them that that’s great because my mom will be cooking us the food.

But most complained about the theme. That I was asking too much that they had to buy clothes just for my birthday.

I snapped.

So I said fine. I’ll change the theme. The theme is there is “nonchalant”. Just come. I don’t care what you wear.

Our only important thing is to watch a movie, eat snacks, and just celebrate me.

January 2024. Only 8 came. The others only informed me they were cancelling on the day itself.

I was pissed for my mom. I told her not to cook for them and that I’ll just buy pizza but she said it’s fine because I rarely bring people in the house anyway except for my boyfriend and it’s good to prepare for 15-20 people once in a while. She even bought specific plastic cups and paper plates. I was so pissed that her effort was so wasteful. We only got to eat less than half. I was so guilty for my parents.

Except those who came to my birthday and the friend who informed she couldn’t go the first time I invited her, no one greeted me on my birthday. Even in my family, the only one who greeted me who wasn’t physically in the house was my sister (she’s in Canada).

That one friend technically didn’t greet me on my birthday… she accidentally dmed me a day before but at exactly midnight. I was like I rly love that you waited for midnight to be the first one to greet but you are 24hrs too early 🤣 she still greeted me on my actual bday but less enthusiastic but it’s ok because the effort the day before already moved me

Anyway I felt like I deserved a greeting at least? Especially those I invited even tho they couldn’t go? Because at least they would have known when my birthday was?

I only received greetings when I posted about my bday and all my acquaintances and not close people in my social media saw it and commented on my post.

February 2024. Started pulling away from my friends. They didn’t notice. I merely just stopped talking about myself. Never let them know what I was doing. I’d still reply in discussions or send memes. But I never talked about what’s going on in my life. Since I’m unemployed, they just thought I probably have nothing to be doing hence the lack of stories.

April 2024. Calling my boyfriend in distress (btw he is included in the counts of people above tho he’s the only one I am 100% sure won’t fail me) because I realized it’s April and I never even bothered to plan for my 26th. I cried that this is the first time I never planned on my birthday a year prior.

July 2024. I told my boyfriend I’m starting to go crazy from lack of social events. I’m an extrovert who likes being around people. Who likes having many people to talk to. I love making people laugh. And the lack of hangouts with friends is making me insane. He tried initiating hangouts for me but the others say they’re busy. I said oh well. More time with my bf then.

August 2024. Found out that one high-school-friend didn’t invite me to his birthday again. He was in my birthday this year. In his birthday, the whole squad was there (as well as my girl bff again) and it was at an out-of-town resort. And our old friends from Singapore were there. We’ve been close since 2014… I haven’t seen them since 2019. I was the first of our group to fly to Singapore to meet them face to face.

We are still friendly. And we are still in contact idk anymore.

My childhood best friend finally came home from Australia after three months. She also couldn’t go to my birthday this year because she was going to Australia for 2 months. But she didn’t greet me either. Anyway, I went to the airport to welcome her back to the country and I dressed up as a limousine driver to make her laugh. Since we also missed her birthday and I’m unemployed, I told her my only gift is picking her up from the airport.

September 2024. I told my bf I don’t wanna celebrate my birthday anymore. I’d rather celebrate it with just us two. He told me he knew what I really wanted was a big party with a theatrical theme. I told him I’m tired of being disappointed and unappreciated. I don’t trust anyone else except him and my family. He understood I both want and don’t want celebrating with just him. But he knew I made a choice.

I finally landed a job. I told no one except my boyfriend. But I had to tell my groups cos I asked for advice on how to email my manager that my trainor is harsh and unprofessional and yelling at me when I do something faster in excel because I wasn’t told to do that so why am I doing that but then not apologizing when I showed all the right results but faster. She told me before she trained me that the work I was about to do can take all eight hours. I did it in 45 minutes.

When I showed her why I was so fast, I explained to her the methods I made. She told me I was NOT ALLOWED FORMULAS ON EXCEL. Told me I was NOT ALLOWED TO COPY PASTE EQUATIONS even if it would have been the same. Kept yelling at me that I was doing things wrong that I have to finish each sheet (the workbook has 31 sheets) by copying the whole sheet first, formatting the appearance of the sheet based on how accounting likes it before moving to the next sheet, and only then can I go back to the first sheet and change the details for some data for each sheet first, then calculating each column every 2 rows manually in each sheet first, and then finally doing the total for each sheet.

Even though it’s more efficient to format everything, and then open the first sheet and change the details, calculate each column every 2 rows with the equations I can’t copy paste (take note it has like 50-100 cells to be filled each sheet), and total them… before moving to the next sheet. Because all the data involved is in a folder per branch. Which is the 31 sheets that represent the 31 branches.

The CEO/President himself hired me because he’s aware the old process is way too slow and outdated. And he’s been frustrated with the other officers. And he wanted an excel proficient employee to make it fast.

I asked the gcs for advice on how to tell my manager that I am being hindered for my objectives assigned to me for this role by the CEO himself.

Most of them said I’m being stupid and reckless and dumb and I shouldn’t say anything. And I’m just doing this as revenge for my co-worker being a pain. And I’m just being a lil btch. And that this is so me, the extroverted girl who keeps confronting people as soon as they make me feel bad. And I’m not being careful because I never really think when I’m being treated unfairly.

This was the only time I talked to them about a serious thing that happened to me this year.

It’s so bad

I didn’t tell them about how utterly depressed I was. Didn’t even telling them I applied for a job and got contacted by the CEO himself. Didn’t tell them I was given a laptop by a friend abroad because she saw a post of mine saying I can’t land a job because most jobs ask that you have your own computer.

And even if I still have it a bit hard, I wouldn’t be able to edit fanvids on YouTube which give me a lil bit from people donating in my ko-fi.

I didn’t even tell them I’m severely underpaid. That I will be working a lot of overtime shifts because of the nature of my job but I won’t receive extra pay for them (however I can “earn” the extra hours and use them to offset days I don’t feel like going to work).

I didn’t tell them my schizophrenia meds were finally removed from my list of meds. I didn’t tell them I spend half a month at my bf’s house every month now. I didn’t tell them my bf and I have talked about our plans for our wedding (like for real and we’re literally doing our best now for our future together). I didn’t tell them ANYTHING.

An example on why I feel entitled to be a little appreciated on my birthday with a greeting.

My college-friend group has a “tradition” to buy a gift for each other’s birthdays. One gift from the whole group. I always plan them because they can’t think of anything. I box them, wrap them, have them delivered, write notes. If they’re handmade gifts (like us writing letters and stuff like that), I tell them to send their words online and I will compile them and have it handwritten with calligraphy, enveloped, sealed with wax, and be delivered via mail post.

The gifts I planned for the people in this group in just the past year:

handwritten letters to a friend who’s love language is words of affirmation

visiting a friend’s house since they usually can’t join us physically because they’re so far away so I planned our travels surprised them and their mom helped me with it so they wouldn’t have plans that day

a mandalorian figurine because they love star wars

a cute well-packed cat goodies and toys and other essentials for cats for our friend who has a cat and had told us over the years how expensive cat treats are

an air mattress because our friend’s been stressing out the past months about saving money to buy an extra mattress

a makeup set that fits our friend’s features better because they keep complaining people treat them like a child so we gave them some more “mature” colors

perfume with a scent made of several flowers in which those flowers represent a specific trait and all three traits fit them perfectly

Their gift for me as a group this year

a cake (ive told them over and over i dont eat anything sweet and we always go back to the “WHY YOURE SO WEIRD” debate over and over, the only sweet thing i consume is soda)

[the-firebird69]

We're supposed to have no vehicles at some point and I don't think that's right our people can't make stuff it's not true but if you don't have vehicles there'll be a war everywhere and we will probably not exist so with that said we should probably stop the **** talk no matter who's doing it .

Howard Stern

We should also check the fax and it says they're not letting us build new cars meaning the parts that let us send whatever is in storage and we do see it and we have to start making parts granted there's gonna be a lot of cars because a lot of people will die but we still will have to make them and much better than they're made now and we're planning on doing it really quickly we have a lot of prototypes we have a lot of stuff ready we have a lot of concept cars that are ready. We have a lot of people who are gonna try and team up and we need that we also have a lot of opposition and it is fierce and we will have to eliminate it and it's gonna be a team effort and they are getting up for it now finally they're getting their comic con stuff together too and their cosplay. It is a big part of it here with these guys it is life and death they are charged up because of Batman falling completely out and saying You'll be consumed like everybody else and he's upset because even the Morlock I'm wondering why and what he thinks he can do and it's ridiculous he can't possibly do what he thinks he can. There's a lot of stuff that we have to do there's a lot of things going on but this is a very productive afternoon thus far we've gotten a lot of stuff done it is wonderful we don't have very much else to do well he's trying to get to the laundry mat and we don't know if it's gonna stop raining we think it will. There

Thereis othre things happening we mention it now quick

-- we are under duress here and by a few groups and the rain is one way and timing and such adn he is the one pressured. trump is heating up his fleet. the stoneships yes and the twenty remains heated and about four percent out. all heated. he adds ten percent. and soon ten more. end of day hesaid all thirty. thusly fifty percent of the fleet will ave heated up once again. this portion is larger well yes the shps are. tons of them yes.

--- We haven't covered and we're watching actually what's in front of us and it's very rude this guy next door is a rude person and a loser and I'll tell you what it's gross it's so bad so we are getting ready to do that and to wage a war and we are going to begin fighting and it's going to be a big deal there's going to be a huge war out here in the rings today right now there are about 300 million pseudo empire and about 700 million mac for lock are on the way. 300 million of them are here and it's continuous non stop and also hostilities have begun between Daniel and Trump and he found out that Daniel has been taking from the stashes and caches and he has a good chunk of it and I use it a war

--- Couple other things guiding store is very obnoxious we want him out and requested it. We have a few other things and there are orders for him to be removed one of them is the Pseudo Empire is being attacked in the Eastern Hemisphere and it is a large scale attack there are huge amounts of Morlock heading towards their bases it's probably three times the largest group well no but it's a third again it's big. They are still at about 38% down so it's 62% operational but they are having a tough time and there's a lot of these guys moving in and they're infiltrating over there at the areas near the Bunkers in their areas and their bases and the bunkers and it's going to be a heavy loss day for the pseudo empire now they're trying to recover still in losing people and they were in about 7.4 percent last year now they're at about 6.2 percent it's not that much of a loss but they are going to suffer more losses shortly

--- There's other things happening we tell them things are happening early but really it's getting disgustingly rude it is a pain in the **** these people suck so bad he's just sitting here with all these lies coming at him it's too much and we need to change it we need to stop these people. We also have Tommy F giving up for another crack at the Turkey nuclear power plant and other power plants in areas like this in this area. We need to get working here big time right now and I'm sending orders

--- In the Eastern Hemisphere they're going after Trump's stashes cashes nuclear bunkers bunkers and areas so far they have hit 15 more medium and they are attacking and they plan to crack open 5 more today they've been hitting. that would be on the West Coast of Africa it's about 30 miles south of Cape Verde parallel. All said and done they still are under 10% breach of the Punkers and if today or even tomorrow morning it's very slow. It leads us to the Tommy F and Everglades back to it

--- There's a lot of rumors going around that he's started doing this and he really has not he's going to start shortly he says and he's going to try and seek the power plant and he figures his radioactive material that they put in the ground and there's radioactive material from the caverns and if they meet it will probably sink the place and sometimes it does. We don't think it will in this case but it will cause the power disruption other areas he's going to try the same thing including Charlotte Harbor. And it's going on probably this week sometime the next day or so or this weekend we're moving into the 23rd shortly and we only have a week until the 31st and he's supposed to pull out by then ships and people so our son and daughter say maybe he pulls out and then he hits the Everglades and other places like it all over the world that makes a lot of sense however different than what was said it does make a big deal and a big difference but he might be pulling out because he could have planted something but people say we don't think so he's gonna probably fire from the ship and he's and he's been firing something it's not not the laser and our son and daughter say I don't know if you really need to use a laser and that might be true if you go ahead at the shore you're using an ipod microwave emitter it's below the water line and you scorch it to the nuclear material do the work itself keep in mind you wanna be low he wants to be below the low tide mark

Thor Freya

no duh lol ahhaahh we cant look at each other no dumm low tide is here hahaahah

tommy f

and shut up it is conservtion

mac daddy

hahhah ma daddy no mac dadyd makes sense. and ok still. an now it is about the glades

mike tew

Olympus