#yes i should be putting my own alarm and waking up by myself but im not allowed to have my phone by me when i go to bed

[aroace-poly-show]

barely fucking woke up and my moms already pissed at me for stuff thats not even my fucking fault this is so awesome

[yunhowifeu]

New Kid

Choi San x FemReader

Word count: 3k+

Warnings: cussing and fighting

About: new kid Choi San and all the drama

__________________________________________

“What time is it?” I say to myself, looking at my clock. “Shoot!” I say as I rush out of bed and get ready. I had woken up at 7:30 and told myself I would only sleep for 10 more minutes but well…

I rush into the school getting a tardy pass and speed walk to my class but I don’t realize and bump into a guy. “I am so sorry, I didn’t see u there” I say as the guy smiles and says “no it’s okay really” he was pretty cute honestly. I’d stare at him all day if I could but I had to get to class. I was about to walk away but before I do he says “I am a new student, would u mind showing me around? I’m kind of lost. “I’m actually heading to my class right now and I’m pretty late already” I say. “Oh ok, I’ll figure it out on my own” he smiles and walks away. I felt bad so I turned around and walked up to him again. “It’s fine I’ll show u around, honestly I don’t even like my first class that much, I just wanted to be earlier to get work done and well the teacher is pretty strict but it won’t hurt to help out a bit and miss a bit” i tell him w a smile.

I show him around the school, we get stopped by an administrator but we told him I was showing the new guy around so he let us keep walking around.

He got cuter by the minute, we made conversation while walking to each section of the school every now and then. He smiled a lot. Such an innocent soul.

I finally walk him to his first class as we face each other and he hands me his phone with his phone number on it. “Just in case I get lost again or something” he says and smiles again. I obviously saved his number. “My name is Choi San by the way” he says. “Im Y/N” We smiled at each other shook hands and then he walked into class. I decided to skip the rest of the class period. I didn’t feel like putting up with the teachers lecture on timing.

I’m not a bad student. I have decent grades. Oh well yes I do sleep in and come to school late every now and then but I mean in my defense, I’m a deep sleeper and sometimes I don’t be hearing my alarm clock. I also be staying up late at night to finish my work and that also doesn’t help the fact I wake up late. I’d also like to mention that I’m quite an extrovert and like partying as-well so sometimes I stay up late at parties…

I don’t have many friends, but that’s my choice because I’ve cut many people because of how fake they were.

Later that day I get a call from San. “Hello?” I answer. “Hey so I remember u showing me where the cafeteria is but I kind of forgot where” he says as I hear him sigh slightly. “Oh I see, I was actually on my way there, where are you right now?” I ask. “Um I can’t tell you exactly because I don’t know” he giggled. “I showed you around though, did you learn nothing?” I laugh teasing. “Sorry, well actually I think this is the science section I’m assuming because there is posters about science” he says. “Well it wouldn’t be gym class if it has science posters around” I laugh. “Ur right” he says laughing too.

I go for him and we walk together to the cafeteria. “I usually don’t eat lunch but if you want to get lunch you can get in that line over there” I point. “You should come with me” he says. “I’m not really hungry” I reply. “Well you have to eat something, eat a fruit only or something” he says. “Alright then” I say as we both get in line.

After getting lunch, I show him the way to the table I usually sit at. We sit down as I greet all my friends w a wave. I introduce him to my friends. “Jasmine, Leo , Ryan , and lili” I say as I point at each of them while I say their names. “This is San guys, he is the new student here” I say. “Nice to meet you all” San says. “Nice to meet you too” jasmine says.

We all talk for a while, getting to know Sam better. The bell rings and I stand up to throw my tray w the orange peel only on it away but San grabs it and smiles. “I’ll throw it away for you” he says while he walks over to the trash and throws mine and his trays away. Lili nudges me “I think he likes you” she whispers. “For real” jasmine agrees. “I just met him guys, calm down” I say. Leo and Ryan waved and walked away. “He is cute though, he is probably gonna become popular in no time, watch, Maddie is gonna be all over him” lili says indicating to Maddie the most popular and so called “prettiest girl in school”. San walks back over. “Shall we go to the next class now?” he asks as he smiles. Lili drags Jasmine away “bye, see guys” she waves. I know what she was doing. I had the same class as lili next and we usually went to class together but she just wanted to leave me alone with San.

I walk San to his next class then realize he has the same class as me and lili so I let him know. “Ouu exciting” he says. We sit down next to where lili was already sitting. I glance at her. She makes a kissing motion with her hands, teasing. I throw a paper ball at her. She just giggled. I look at San again and see him looking back at me smiling. We look at each other for a bit then he speaks. “You have pretty eyes” he says. I looked away shyly. Lili leans over and says “they really are, everything about her is super pretty right?”. I push her w my hand slightly. “Yeah you’re right” San says. Lili smirks as she sits up right again. “U didn’t have to agree with her, she just likes talking nonsense sometimes” I say to San. “I don’t think it was nonsense, I genuinely think you are too” he says. I look away not wanting him to see the slight blush that’s forming on my face. He giggles and says “cute”. I’m pretty sure he noticed me blushing…

After school I get a call from San again. “Well I really appreciated you helping me out today and I’d like to ask if you wanted to hang out?” He asks. “I have study, sorry” I say feeling a bit bad but he says “we can study together then?” He says. “Sure, I’m going to the school library right now, meet me there”I say. “New kid, remember?” I hear him slightly laugh. “Right, I forgot, my bad” I say. “I’ll come for you the we can walk together to the library, where you at?” I ask. “I’m still at my math class, 307” he says. “On my way” I say as I hang up and start walking to his class.

We start walking towards the library but then Maddie gasps loudly making me and San both look, she comes up to us. “Hii!” She says smiling widely at San. “Are you the new guy?” She asks. “Yes” he says and smiles. “Wow you look even better in person” she says. “Huh?” San says. “Oh well some one secretly took a picture of you and they uploaded it online” she says. “Of course” I mumble annoyed. San looks at me confused. Maddie looks at me clearly judging me. “Why are you with…her..” she says to San still looking at me. “She is my close friend now, she showed me around and made me feel welcomed, and we were actually on our way to study together” he replies. “Omg let me come with” she says excitingly. “No” I say. she rolls her eyes. “Is your name san?” She asks him. “Yes” San says. “Sannie tell your friend to not be rude to me, I’m just trying to be your friend” she says trying to act innocently. “Whatever” I say. I continue “anyways, come on San let’s go” I say pulling san’s arm as I walk forward. “Don’t touch him, you didn’t ask for his consent did you.” She says raising her eyebrow as she takes my hand off him. “Can you mind your own damn business” I say. “Sannie-“ I don’t let her continue and cut her off. “Shut up will you” I say. I realize I might be making a bad impression of myself to San acting like this. “Sorry, San I’m usually not like this, i just feel good right now” I say. “So go home and rest, me and San will study, bye!” Maddie says. “You know what, sure whatever, do whatever you want” I say as I roll my eyes and walk out of the school.

The next day at school at the cafeteria I see San sitting with Maddie and laughing and giggling. I sit down annoyed. “Damn she got to him already” jasmine says looking over at them. “Mmm but let me tell you guys that San likes Y/N” lili says putting a spoon full of food in her mouth.

“We don’t wanna keep listening to your boy talks honestly” Ryan says. “He doesn’t like me, you’re making it weird” I say ignoring Ryan. “Yea he does, I’m telling you!” Lili says. “I bet he does” jasmine says. “He literally complimented her yesterday” Lili says looking at jasmine. “Omg period” jasmine says. “It was one compliment, I compliment people too but that don’t mean I have a crush on them” I say. “Whatever, you guys like each other and you know it” Lili says. “Next topic please” Leo says. “Look at Maddie touching his shoulder, ew” Jasmine says. “Go over and save him” Lili says. “If I do, there might be a fight and I don’t feel like it” I say. “Fine I’ll go for you” Lili says standing up. “Don’t” I say. She walks over to their table anyways. I see her talking but can’t hear. She then drags San over to our table. “Here he is guys” Lili says. Leo and Ryan stand up and walk away. “Maddie and her friend Zoe came up to us. “What do you guys think you’re doing?” Maddie says crossing her arms. “Right, he is our friend, so leave him alone” Zoe says grabbing san’s arm. San moves his arm away. “Well actually, Y/N was my first friend and I’d like to stick around with her” San says. “Period so fuck off” Jasmine says. “Jass calm down” I say. “No cuz they think they all that, I’m tired of it” she continues. “Ik me too but just calm down” I say. “Oh no continue talking shit, because we for a fact know we are all that, you guys are the ones that think you’re the main characters trying to steal the new kid from us” zoe says. “Steal? Girl we were the first ones to have met him, the fuck are you on?” Jasmine says pushing zoe slightly. Zoe pushes Jasmine back. “Don’t fucking touch me” she says. “I do whatever the fuck I want hoe” Jasmine says pushing zoe harder making her stumble a bit backwards. I hold Jasmine to try and calm her down but then Maddie gets a hold of jasmine’s hair and pulls it. Jasmine get out of my grasp and punches Maddie. Zoe grabs Jasmine from the back dragging her down with her arm around jasmine’s neck as Maddie start throwing punches. Lili gets involved as I try to separate all of them but the whole cafeteria starts recording and circling around. San tries separating them too. I get hit and San quickly checks up on me. “I’m fine” I say. The vice principal and the guards come up and separates them.

Leo and Ryan come back as they check up on Jasmine and Lili. The vice principal takes them all to the principal’s office as I go to my next class with San.

We stay quiet for a while but then San says “was that fight because of me? Was it my fault? Because clearly I’m wanted in both friend groups” he says. “No it’s just we have never really gotten along and well Jasmine had enough and Lili just wanted to help but it’s not your fault” I say. Lili walks in and sits down next to us not saying anything and just holding an ice pack to her face but after a while she says. “If I catch those bitches outside ima beat their asses”. “Is Jasmine okay?” I ask. “No, in the principal’s office Maddie pushed Jasmine so hard that she fell and hit her head, she started bleeding and I couldn’t even see what happen next cuz they just sent me to the nurse” she says. “Maddie so childish” I say. “Like how you gonna do that even in-front of the principal” I continued. “Maddie and Zoe getting suspended, so is Jasmine but I’m not suspended, they just gave me a warning” she says.

Few months pass and me and San got even closer, we hang out after school often as-well. Maddie hasn’t tried getting close to San again, only because she will get expelled if she gets into one more fight and we already know that if Maddie tried to get close to San again, Jasmine would get pissed all over again. About Jasmine though, she is good now.

“After school I plan on going to the club with Lili, wanna come with us?” I ask San.

“They let you guys in?” San asks. “The owner is lili’s cousin” I say. “Alright, I’ll go” he says. San later that day picks me and Lili up and takes us to the club.

Lili goes to a different part of the club. I stay with San and we dance. A guy comes up to me and asks to dance. I agree because I assume a girl will just go up to San and dance anyways eventually. The guy grabs my waist and I put my arms around his neck. After a while of dancing with him I look over and see San dancing with a girl so I continue. The guy leans in and tries kissing me but I try to push him away. “Come on don’t act hard to get princess” he says while still pulling me close trying to kiss me. I try pushing away but he grasps me tighter. “Let me go” I say already feeling very uncomfortable. He doesn’t let me go. “She said let her go” San says. The guy lets go. “And who are you exactly?” The guy asks San. “Her boyfriend” San says putting his arm around my shoulders. The guy rolls his eyes and walks away. I look at San “thanks” I say. “You’re welcome, maybe stick with dancing with me only next time” he says. “Yeah you’re right” I say. I start not feeling good a little after and we go home as-well as Lili. I did wanna dance but kissing a stranger is too far. It was a bit weird honestly.

Weeks later me and San watch movies on my couch and I grab some beers I have from parties left overs. “You sure we should be drinking?” He asks. “I’ve done it multiple times, we will be fine” I say. We both start drinking and before you know it we both get kind of tipsy.

I see San staring at my lips and well I’ve found him cute for a while now so why not kiss him I thought. I kissed him and he pulled me in close kissing me back. The kiss gets more intense by the second. We make out and it goes on for a while as San grabs my hips and sits me down on top of him. We keep kissing passionately but then I hear a knock at my door. I get off of San and open the door. It was Jasmine. “I need to vent” she says with tears in her eyes. I had to kick San out and even tho I was still tipsy and well kept thinking about San I still let Jasmine vent to me.

The next day at school San and I barely talk at lunch and the class after that, until I broke the silence and said “so we are just gonna act like whatever happen yesterday didn’t happen?” I ask. “I don’t know, I didn’t think you remembered since we were a bit drunk” he says. “Well I do remember” I say looking down at my desk.

We stayed quiet for the rest of the class but after school I invited him over to my house. He agreed and we sit on the couch. “I think at first I was just in denial but now I’m sure that I like you” I say. He smiles and says “I like you too”. We stay quiet for a bit but then he pulls me in for a kiss but then pulls away. “Wanna be my girlfriend?” He asks. “Well you could have asked in a more romantic way you know” I tease. “My apologies, how dare I” he plays along. “I’m just kidding, I’d love to be your girlfriend” I say. He smiles and kisses me again. We kiss for a while then we get a bit carried away, but that’s for a mother story🤫

The next day I told my friends and well…

“I KNEW IT!” Jasmine says, “I literally told you so, I knew you guys liked each other!” Lili says.

They were happy for us and well we were happy to be together as-well. Maddie wasn’t too happy about it but it’s not like we cared.

The end✨

[aenxiome]

Chapter 4: Who do you call when the ghostbuster is on vacation?

When I awake, I find myself tangled up in the bedsheets, half lying on top of Jazz and the other half plastered against the wall. Somehow we ended up looking like a pretzel. When the alarm started to blare, we startled and accidentally crashed into each other. Some part of her hit me in the mouth while my head slammed into her own.

" Oww, Jazz, cant you keep your head to yourself," I whine accusingly while trying to rub away the pain. " ah, that's going to leave a mark," Wincing as I look at her, holding the side of her head rubbing her temple. We carefully separate ourselves from each other, taking in mind our new splitting twin headaches and my own lasting injury from the day before.

I look over at Sam and Tucker, who are also waking up. It seems Sam found a comfortable spot on the floor using a bunch of blankets and a few of my hoodies along with a pillow from who knows where. On the other hand, Tucker fell asleep in my desk chair with his head on his arms lying across the desk. Jazz reaches over and turns off the alarm. She sits up, still half asleep,p and makes her way out of the room. I continue to lay on the bed as Sam and Tucker finish waking up, with Sam going as far as to put away the bedding and hoodies.

"Hey," Tucker says when he sees that I'm awake, " Are you feeling okay? You're not going to pass out again, are you?" Sam turns around at his questioning and exclaimed, "Danny! Your awake!" I smile sheepishly at them, " I'm okay, a little sore, but I'm fine." I attempt to sit up, but a wince accompanies every move. When Sam notices, she comes to sit on the side of the bed and helps me. Once I'm finally up, she engulfs me in a gigantic hug. When she pulls away from the embrace, she puts her hands on her hips and starts yelling, " Do you know how much you scared us!" Finally, she shakes my shoulder with tears brimming in her eyes, " Don't you ever do something like that again!"

" I won't, and I didn't know that would happen." Tucker comes over and joins the conversation. His expression is serious, " Dude, when you fell, it was like we were back in the lab. I thought…" he brakes, choking up, " I don't know what I thought but seeing you like that again." blowing out a shaky breath he finishes, " I thought we lost you this time."

Sam moves out of the way as I reach over and clasp my hand on his shoulder and look him in the eye, " Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere." Then, trying to lose the tension, Sam asks, " Hey, do we still have clothes here or," I cut her off, "Oh, yeah, look in the bottom drawer," I say referencing the dresser, "you both should have clothes left in there." They both go to grab clothes and rush off to go get dressed.

I hate lying to them, but I can't guarantee anything. That feeling, just knowing what to do without having to think about it. Just feels so right. It was almost as if, at that moment, I was complete. While, yeah, doing it in my human form was my bad, though. I didn't expect such a big drawback but ill be ready for that next time. Maybe in my ghost form, it won't be so bad, though? I'll have to test this, but where…. " The bathroom is free," Sam shouts as she goes by the door freeing me of my musing. Tucker leaves the room to get ready, and I attempt to get up.

Every mussel protests as I force my fist into the top of the mattress and gingerly force myself to stand. I fight my tight muscles and straighten myself trying to keep my balance. I force myself to walk around the room and get ready for the day. With every step I take and arm movement, I make pain shoots through me. Up through my legs and into my waist into my joints and up inside my chest, my core, I feel pain. When moving my arms, they feel like a ton of bricks, making them feel heavy. I wince as I change my clothes and then put on a neutral face and make my way to the kitchen.

When I get there, the three of them are around the kitchen table eating cereal, but no Mom or Dad to be seen. Jazz sees me first, immediately getting up and forcing me into a chair, which I am so grateful for despite my neutral deposition. " What are you doing down here?" She hisses, " You should still be in bed." I grab a box of cereal and shove my hand in while replying, "as I told them," gesturing to my friends, " I'm fine." Grabbing me a bowl, she says, " You could barely walk stand hours ago. Let alone walk on your own. I'm not buying it." I avoid looking at her while providing my defense, " Spead healing remember. Im better."

" If your sure, man, but wouldn't you rather stay home? Sam had to help you sit up earlier." Tucker says. Jazz points at me righteously, " See, you need your rest! Go back to bed." She demands. I shake my head in refusal, " I can't afford to miss any more school. I'll be fine, I swear." We all continue arguing about my attendance when eventually Jazz gives up but forces an ultimatum, "fine, you can go, but no ghost fighting! Not until your 100%." I groan in response, " Then what are we going to do if a ghost attacks?" I question.

"We can handle it." Said Sam determined. "But what if-" I start to interject but can cut off by Sam, " We help you all the time. Doing it by ourselves won't be hard, you'll see. After all, three is better than one." I relent and let go of my argument. It doesn't take long for us to finish eating and head to Jazzes car.

The struggle starts as soon as we get out the door. The box ghost has managed to get out again. Before anyone can stop me, I fire off a carefully placed ectoblast and force him down. A second later, I pull out my thermos, and he was immediately sucked up and defeated. Maybe it was a cheap attack, but with the way things are currently beggars, can't be choosers.

"Danny!" Jazz shouts accusingly. " What?" At the angry looks, I sigh and continue, "It was only the Boxxy." Tucker tilts his head in question while sam voices their confusion, "Boxxy?" I nod my head agreeing with the name, "Yeah, Boxxy." Tucker looks as if he has swallowed a lemon, "you're giving the ghost nicknames now?" Great something else for us to argue over, "So? Why does it matter? They give me nicknames, So I can give them ones." They still don't look happy, but we are running out of time. "Can we talk about this later? Were going to be late." Tucker takes a look at his PDA and shows it to the others. The conversation is done.

For now.

They may not like what I did, but in my opinion, it is well worth it. One less ghost for them to worry about.

We all pilled in and traveled in silence to the school, barely making it in time. Before we get out, Jazz stops us to give a lecture, "Danny, no fighting today. Not with the ghosts, not with Dash, not with anyone. Understood?"

"Yeah, Yeah," I reply, sulking, "I know."

Then she turns to Sam and Tucker, " Now you two, keep Danny out of trouble. If anything gets out of hand, let me know, and I will take care of it." They answer simultaneously, " We've got it." Then, she turns back to me once again, " if the pain gets too bad, let me know, and I'll take you home."

" I'll be fine," I reassure her.

"If you say so," she says, not in the mood for an argument.

We enter just as the warning bell rings, making me feel a bit bad. While anymore I'm habitually late for just about everything, that doesn't mean that they are. We rush to homeroom and make it just in time to reach our new assigned seats and get ready for class.

The day is just beginning.

How hard could one Friday be?

A lot harder than expected.

As soon as the class finished, I headed out for my next class when I felt something. I was pulled by the back of my shirt into another hallway, separating me from Sam and Tucker. I get pushed up against the wall making an echoey thump in the hallway. I look around the hall, empty, then look up at my kidnapper. Lo and behold, it's just Dash again. When is this guy going to give me a break? I mean, this is ridiculous. Doesn't he have a life? This whole hallway meet-up is starting to become a cliche at this point. So instead of paying attention to Dashs' pathetic reasonings for his grab and go, I drown him out and internally ask the really important questions like:

Does this count as Kidnapping? While yes, I have been taken without my consent, I haven't left the building. So maybe this would be a forced separation? Abduction? Couldn't this be considered as a criminal ac-.

My thoughts get cut off as his fist lands in my stomach. I blanch from the sucker punch feeling my cereal trying to make its way back up. I manage to swallow it back down just as another punch makes contact. I try to keep my composer, but my body just can't take it. A small dribble of vomit makes its way out of my mouth and onto Dashs' arm. " Ew!" He exclaims, "Did you just spit up on me! Uggh, what's wrong with you, Fenton." With a look of disgust on his face, almost as he can't believe I got sick on him, he turns around and goes back into the main hall while I book it to the nearest trash can.

I manage to spit out what I had come up without losing any more of my breakfast. I lean up against the wall trying to pull myself back together. The punches, while weak, still hurt. The force made my core pulsate as if trying to come forward to protect me. When it pulsated, I could feel how strained it is. Even with its call for me, my core is weak, throbbing for reprieve.

The minute bell starts to ring as I force myself down the hallway, gritting my teeth, trying to stop the pain. It takes longer than usual for me to get there, oh how I wish, scratch that (you never know when you-know-who is listening *cough* Desiree *cough*), would love to be able to float right now. Thankfully I didn't get in any more trouble than a simple tardy on my record when I showed up. Being known for bathroom issues can come with its perks.

Classes so far today have been my saving grace. Especially since we have health instead of P.E this week, if I had to move around much more, it would have become the end of me. Not that the hallways aren't trying to get to me first.

To make it even better, So far, the only ghostly activity has been a couple of blobs. Hopefully, by the end of the day, I will somewhat be back to normal.

Once we are let out for lunch, I slowly make my way to the cafeteria. Once I get there, I spot Sam and Tucker near the back of the room already with their food. Sam, of course, has some kind of green thing. I can't tell what it is, but I know it's the opposite of Tuckers. I can identify his food, a leftover pork chop, and other assorted non-veggies make up his lunchbox.

After the Lunch Lady incident at the beginning of the year, they started to favor meals from at home rather than the schools. Sam for the issue with her not being able to eat what they serve as it is not to her taste, and Tucker for his issue with " stinky ectoplasm messing with beautiful meat." Apparently ecto- contaminated meat is where he draws the line with his obsession.

Me on the other hand, I am more than willing to risk it. A meal that Jazz and I didn't cook with less than a 70% chance of coming to life, sign me up. On the off chance that I do bring something from home, it is always factory-sealed junk food. I don't want to be known as the guy who brought murder hotdogs to lunch.

"Danny!" I hear coming from their spot, calling me over to them. I sit down across from them, letting out a relieved sigh. "There you are," Sam says, relieved, " we were getting ready to come to look for you. We thought Dash cramped you into a locker again." Thankfully not, I can't help but think. Those things are cramped. When I got to class after Dashs' interference, they weren't pleased about what had gone down. Tucker looked almost murderous when he found out what kept me.

" Aren't you going to get any food, dude?" Tucker asks between mouthfuls of food. "Nah," I reply and gesture to the line, " there is no way ill be able to get anything before lunch is over." The lines go down the walls of the cafeteria until right before the door. " I'm not hungry anyway," I say, lying through my teeth. " Are you sure?" Sam asks, quirking her eyebrow at me. " Yeah, I'm sure. If I change my mind, I'll get something." Satisfied, we turn our attention to small talk.

After a while, our conversation heads back to current events. " So, what do you plan to do about the ice thing?" Sam asks. I tilt my head a little in confusion, " What ice thing?" I get two looks of exasperation back before Sam slowly says, " You know the thing from the lot." Oh, that ice thing, " I thought that was all taken care of? It's not there anymore, so what is there to worry about?"

"Yeah, it's gone, but where did it come from? It's not like there are a lot of ghosts that can make ice." Tucker points out. A feeling of understanding rushes through me as I part my lips, " Ohh, did I forget to tell you?" Both of them look at me dumbfounded as I wait for an answer. I slump down farther in my seat as I reveal, " The ice is mine." Eyes wide, Sam questions, " You made a spike of Ice?" I nod my head then she continues angry with my omission, " why didn't you tell us!? We thought there was a new ghost on the loose!"

"I thought you guys knew," I say, throwing my hands up in defense. "I'll admit I've never done something like that before, but I thought you would have realized it came from me. As Tuk said, there aren't many ghosts who can make ice." Tucker comes to their defense, "It's not like we have ever seen you do that before." I sigh in understand then try to create the end of the discussion, " I plan to go to the Farfrozen to see Frostbite anyway. After what happened yesterday, I need to know what's going on with me."

"What do you-" Tucker gets cut off by a scream. The whole room goes dead silent. Then, another scream comes right after echoing through the room. After a second, just about everyone is jumping out of their seats in a panic. Sam and Tucker rush to their bags and start pulling out ecto-weapons. " Sit here," Sam orders, " let us take care of it."

"Yeah, Yeah," I blow them off, "well, at least the line is gone. I'm going to grab a bag of chips or something." Another scream echoes out, and they start running towards the door. "Be careful!" I yell out at their backs, but they are already out the door. I get up and go through an empty line and buy some pre-packaged foods and then make my way back towards my seat.

I take a few minutes to eat what I want then put the rest in my bag. I look towards a clock that's in the room and see that almost ten minutes have gone by. Against their orders, I pick up my things and go towards the chaos. Once I make it to them, I see something that I would never have expected. In the middle of the hallway are Sam, Tucker, and Jazz, tangled up with two Ecto-Octopi.

One of them has Tucker hanging upside down, holding him by his ankle. While another has Sam squashed beneath its tentacles and shaking her like a rag doll. Jazz, on the other hand, is the only one who is armed. She Is hiding behind a trashcan with a lipstick blaster.

I stare at the chaos in front of me and can't help but to say, " what in the zone is going on!?" My yell startles everyone. Even the Octopi.

"Danny!" They all holler simultaneously, the people, not the Octopi. " Getaway, we've got this!" Sam yells back. " This what you call handled?!" I say, hands out, gesturing to the scene in front of me.

I walk over to Jazz and take the lipstick blaster away and start over towards the ghosts. Using the lipstick blaster, I hit the Octopus holding Sam and the eye. The pain startled them, and they quickly released its tentacle from around her. Sam hurried away and rushed over towards me. " Give the blaster to me, let us handle it" I ignore her and push us away from the octopus just as a tentacle comes slamming down onto the tile floor.

" Get back, let me handle it!" I say in a rush, " You too Jazz," looking back towards her. I make my way forward with the blaster and go to the octopus keeping Tucker. I carefully point the blaster at its tentacle with a steady hand and fastly slash downward with it cutting it off. The tentacle and Tucker drop towards the ground. The heat from the blaster cauterizes the wound leaving only the ectoplasm from the cut limb to bleed out.

Tucker rushes over to safety as I use the blasters to hit them in the eye once again. While being temporarily blinded, they flail their limbs around, trying to hit everything around them. I, on the other hand, quickly reach into my bag and look for a Fenton Thermos. As soon as I find one, I quickly pull off the cap and suck the octopi up and seal them in.

Once everything is in the clear, I slump down to the floor, huffing for breath. Letting the adrenaline wear off, I stay sitting on the floor while everyone else comes to me. "What were you thinking!" Jazz exclaimed while slamming into me with a hug, " Are you hurt? You should have stayed away. Your powers are out. Don't you realize how dangerous this was?" Giving her an accusing look, I can't help but point out, " I am better off than you. A lipstick blaster? What happened to the weapons you guys took with you?" I ask turning to, my friends. Tucker, mumbling with a blush plastered on his face, admits, " They ate them."

I stare at them, starting to lose some color. Then, stumbling with my words, I stutter out, "Ate them? They ate the weapons, oh my, that's not good." Jazz and I both look at each other with a look of doom. "What, what is it?" Sam asks, now worried due to our reactions. " Those weapons weren't normal Fenton weapons." Jazz confesses. " What do you mean?" Tucker asks, confused, " Your parents made them, right?"

Jazz looks over to me for approval which I don't give before she answers, " Those weapons were advanced models. They aren't supposed to be available to the public." I interject, " Since the weapons are made of metal and not an organic ectoplasmic substance, the octopi won't be able to digest it. So meaning eventually they are going to spit the weapons back up." Looking at them and seeing that they are listening, I continue worried, " there is no way to tell when they are going to drop them, and whoever picks them up could hurt someone."

Before we get a chance to talk, any more noises start making their way through the hall. Sam, Tucker, and I go back towards the cafeteria, but before we get too far, Jazz calls out to me, "Danny," I stop to look at her, " I think its best if you go home." Then, giving her a betrayed look for her suggestion, she elaborates, "you don't look too good. Your really pale, and your barely moving."

"I don't know what you're talking about." I reply stubbornly. Sighing, she walks over to me and takes my bag, " Come on, I'll drive you home." Before I can get out a protest, she reminds me, " You need to go to the Farfrozen right? What better time to go than when Mom and Dad are going to be on a ghost hunt." With that, I stopped protesting and let her lead me to the car.

[kiefbowl]

Hi, im 23 and my boyfriend is 44. We've been together for just over a year and have been good together, we have open communication and mutual respect. I guess I'm just wondering, in your opinion, because I respect you and value your thought processes, if its still wrong or predatory? I love him very much, he seems to love me too. Am I being naive?

Thank you for the appreciation. I’d like to put a caveat up front that I can’t know what your relationship looks like, and the only one who knows what it’s like and how healthy it is is you. Additionally, a relationship can have healthy qualities and unhealthy qualities, and good people can have a bad relationship. Healthy parts doesn’t mean the whole is good. 

No, I don’t think you’re being naive. I don’t think there’s any value judgement to attach to a 23 year old entering a relationship with a 44 year old. It does make my eyebrows raise. I find it extremely difficult to believe a 44 year old and a 23 year old have a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship. I don’t think it’s impossible for large age gaps to exist in a healthy relationships necessarily, but when it happens with someone in their 20s, that rings alarm bells to me. Your 20s are still formative years, and it can be hard to see that while you’re living them. There’s a lot of growth you’re going to do before you turn 30. Your career probably hasn’t really taken root yet, your earning potential is going to (probably) increase (maybe even very drastically at some point), you probably don’t really own a lot of stuff and the stuff you own is most likely not all that important to you or of good quality, you’re still young enough to be under your parents insurance, your credit is likely not that great (not that it’s bad, but age of credit lines is a big factor in your credit score), among other admin things that might not seem that big of a deal but do help you form an identity. When I was 23, my responsibility as a consumer was nonexistent because I was poor, at points unemployed, at points living at home...it’s only in the past few years I could start challenging myself to live up to my values and a sense of character that’s important to me as a consumer because I can move around the world more freely. It comes with money, but also career position. So that’s one aspect of being 23...

The other aspect of being 23 is you are very, very, very young, and even without a lot of money it can be very fun to be very, very, very young. It can be a lot of fun being older, too. I’m not old, by any means, but from this point in my life looking forward I’m much more excited to get older than I was at 23. At 23 I dreaded it because it felt like I was running out of time to be young. You get older and you learn to accept it and you realize how much in your life can change in a short time and you realize there’s wisdom, position, and status to gain in each decade of your life. Obviously, not every one is fortunate and not everyone is going to have increasing good fortune as they age, but regardless of what you make or do, you learn and grow as you get older, and I think it’s easier to appreciate as your enter your 30s. So don’t worry about getting older, but let me tell you 23 is FUN. 

23 was also the worst year of my life. I couldn’t afford chicken nuggets. But my friends and I were also working a crummy starbucks job that gave me almost no responsibility. I would wake up at 11, smoke weed and eat cereal, watch netflix, walk to work, work 2:30 - 11, then go out to a bar with my friends and eat cheap wings until 2 am, go home and play with my cat and go to bed literally whenever in an apartment with no furniture to take care of. I’d be off on a random weekday and grab another random friend who was off to go on day trip in their shitty car to Milwaukee for the hell of it, or go take a long walk on the beach listening to music all day, or go downtown and go to a museum on a discount day because no one was there, or ride my bike in the summer sun to nowhere in particular in the middle of the day because people were at work, and then come back home and do fuck all. Then I’d do it all again, plus steal croissants from work and drink endless coffee all day. And it didn’t matter, I could wake up the next day energized. Yes, I was stressed out, and I didn’t always appreciate the joy that can be found in that life because of it also sucked ass, but the energy and fortitude you have as a young 20 something is a beautiful thing to live through. I wouldn’t go back to that life now having the space I’ve made myself in the world, but I love thinking back to it and I’m glad it happened. I had to work really really hard to carve my little place in the world (and I’m not done yet!!), but there was a moment right before I hit the pavement to make that happen where my life felt endless, fresh, uninhibited, palpable. 23 has a different freedom than 30 for me. Money allows me to move in the world freely at 30, time allowed me to move in the world freely at 23. At 23, you can do dumb things, party, hang out, be lazy, be reckless, make quick decisions, change your mind...and it’s good, not bad. It’s learning, and it’s fun. It’s celebration, and it gives you hard lessons worth learning.

A relationship is a lot of responsibility, and it can take the place of some of that youthful freedom. That’s not always a bad thing, love can be very fulfilling. When you’re strapped for cash, it can also be financially helpful. Two 20-somethings joining forces can get each other on their feet to be independent at a time it’s a struggle to do it alone. You’re in the same boat, you have the same struggle. But a 44 year old isn’t experiencing life the same way you are. And believe me, 44 year olds know that. A litmus test to to your bf’s intentions might be how he talks about that fact. Does it ever come up? Does he speak about it freely? Does he laud it over you or do you share experiences with each other like companions?

This isn’t the only factor to consider when trying to figure out if your bf is “predatory” in your words. Who your boyfriend may be and his intentions aren’t the only thing to consider when you want to figure out if you should be in a relationship with him. Who YOU are is equally important. I don’t know a 23 year old who wasn’t different the very next year. I don’t know a 24 year old who wasn’t different the very next year. I don’t know a 25 year old who wasn’t different the very next year. Maybe that’s true for every year, but the differences between my life one year to the next between 20 - 26 were striking. I walked out on two jobs when I had nothing in my bank account simply because “fuck this”....this year I was terrified to lose my job because what about my retirement fund. I work for “the man” now when 6 years ago I caused a mass walk out at work. I’m probably not going to have a radically different life next year. That wasn’t true of my early 20s. The switch from “my life is a mess but it can be anything” to “next year I should start a will and keep care of my assets” happens quicker than you think. Is he letting you live that life right now? Is he encouraging it? Believe me, you can be a mess at any age (and it can be a fun mess, too), and you aren’t old at 30 or even 40 or honestly even 50, you’re just not as tided to things in your 20s. Is he clipping your wings to be kept, or is he letting you fly recklessly into the sun just so you can see how far is too far? You just can’t get 23 back. It’s a lot harder to crash and burn and then pop back up without a scratch after your 20s. Does he want to crash and burn with you? Will he even let you without him? Does he know if you go out into the world young and messy you might learn a lesson or two that makes won’t make him appealing to you anymore? Is his love coming from a place where he wants you to thrive by your own mistakes? Is he excited to watch you walk out the door to take on a new day blind but fearless, just so you can come home and tell him the adventure you took and how it changed you? Or does he find that childish, exhausting, unfitting? Does he want to see you grow into “his” adulthood? Does he need you to fit into his established life more than he wants to live and work beside your unestablished life? I couldn’t even date someone younger with your age difference. They would be 8. But would I tell an 8 year old not to learn to ride a bike because I can just give them a ride in my car, or would I tell them it’s worth learning even though I know they’re going to scratch their knees up? If I loved an 8 year old, I know to see them thrive they have to scratch their knees up a little and I can’t get in the way of it, or they might not learn to ride their bike to take long rides in the summer sun. 

[bbaronpiper]

Wake up call

Here’s another collab with @artsaree​. She’s amazing. you should definitely check out her writings.  So basically, we both wrote half of it . 

warnings: smut

Aron x Reader

my part

7:30 am. Your eyes shot open at the sound of your alarm you turned it off quickly but you still heard a low groan coming from the other side of the bed. You felt Arón stir a little but refused to open his eyes. You turn to face him and run a finger on his cheek. Savoring the few moments you have with your boyfriend. You slept last night without him. He was out partying with his friends. Again. You didn’t have a problem with it at first because you swore you’ll never be that type of girlfriend who controls and forbid their man on the things they want to do. Until recently, it became a habit of his.

“Morning, Baby” His voice was low and husky.      

You smiled at him in return, scooting closer. “Slept well?”

“Si” He said while rubbing his eyes. “Partying after spending whole day on set isn’t easy”

You bit the insides of your cheek to stop you from spitting the words. Arón must have noticed this since he then turned to lie on his back and exhales. Leaving your hand that was on his cheek to fall on his shoulder. “Do you have something to say Y/N?”

You leaned on your elbow trying to get him to look at you. Your hands travelled down to his chest “Don’t you think you’ve been partying a lot lately?”

“Mmm Don’t think so..” he shrugged still not looking at you.

“You’re barely home” you almost whispered not sure if you want to push this discussion.

“What do you mean Y/N? I’m always home” he then looked at you.

You were about to open your mouth to spill everything you’ve been feeling lately but then decided not to. He probably too tired for drama anyways.

“Come here” he motioned to you as he opened his arms. You complied and laid on his chest. “Te quiero.” He lifted your chin up and look at you deeply. “Don’t ever think otherwise. Even just for one second” stupid you, let your heart flutter at his words smiling up at him sweetly.

You splash cold water on your face to snap you out of your thoughts. You stare yourself at the mirror and saw your red and puffy eyes. You kept staring blinking rapidly trying to stop the tears from forming. You stood there for what felt like years before wiping your face with a clean towel. You held your breath one last time, tightly shut your eyes only to open them again, exhale and went out of the bathroom and into your shared bedroom.

2:40 am and he’s still not home. Why are you not surprised?

It was so obvious. Looking back now, you felt like a complete idiot blindsided by love. You should’ve seen it coming when he gave you that smile that didn’t reach his eyes anymore, the way your lips touched and moved in sync but the desire to have you was gone.

“Bet you couldn’t last a day without fucking me” you laughed as you teased him. You two just finished fucking and were now watching a movie when his hands travelled up to your thighs again.

“Is that a challenge?” he raised an eyebrow.

“Nahh, just stating facts” you then got this brilliant idea to get back at him for all those times he made you beg and tease you. You straddled him, bury your face onto his neck softly gliding your lips against his skin while your finger trace against his bare chest. You wore nothing but an oversized shirt of his. Nothing underneath so you’re pretty sure he felt how wet you are right now. Normally, this would work. Arón never declined sex.

“Bebe” you whispered to his ear seductively and nibbled on it after.

“Shhh!!! Here comes the best part!” his eyebrows furrowed as he pointed on the screen.

Oh this was gonna be hard. “So, you’re saying, you wouldn’t touch me even if I am naked?” he shrugged, his lips formed an inverted smile with his eyes still glued to the TV. You then took your shirt off. And you swore you heard a soft “damn” coming from him. You just wanted to mess with him, tease him but the feeling of his skin touching yours turned you on as you start grinding him through his boxers moaning close to his ear.

Nada. No emotions.

You sighed in frustration so you decided to take it to another level. You then turned your back at him leaning on his chest, you open your legs wide and draped your legs on his. You smirked as you can already feel his growing bulge against your ass.

“I hate to fuck myself but since my boyfriend’s ignoring me…. Oh well” you announced as your hand gripped his leg and your other hand start to play with your clit. Rubbing small circles and moaning softly at first. You can feel him shifting underneath you. you were surprised when he grabbed your waist and push you off of him and sat you on the side.

“Yo.. you’re b-blocking the view,Y/N” he said uneasy. His hands gripped his thigh and bit his lower lip way too hard for you not to know he’s about to give in.  

You scoffed at him “Oh it’s on!” you then place your left leg again on his right one and start to rub your clit faster than before making you moan so loud saying things like “Ohhh baby…” “Si, Arooonnn, si!” you’re so wet it made it easier to switch from rubbing your clit into inserting two fingers inside you. your other hand then reached for his growing bulge. He refused to touch you but you definitely wouldn’t refuse to touch him. You started palming him as you pleasure yourself earning a low growl from him. “Let me ride you baby”

You then suddenly felt his hand over yours, the one you had on your pussy and jerk it. “You drive me crazy”

  @artsaree​ /Sara’s part

He managed to push you away a little so he could finally flip you both over so he was now on top.

Smirking down at you he pulled down his pants, making his hard dick slap against his lower stomach.

„Open up.“

You bit your lip and jerked your head back to give him easier access to hover over your face. Slowly he slid his dick in your welcoming mouth, making both of you moan out softly.

„Mhm just like that.“ he groaned and held onto the wall for support as you were sucking his tip seductively.

„Take it.“ he suddenly spoke and pushed his length into your mouth. It was always a little hard for you to fit all of him in your little mouth but he still made sure you were okay.

There was still a little space left so you nodded at him to tell him he could push his entire dick in your mouth.

„Dont want you to gag, u know that.“ he just mumbled but did as you told him and he slid his cock deeper.

„Ah fuck.“ he groaned and threw his head back in pleasure.

You could feel tears building up, he seemed to notice too because he pulled out completely. You swallowed and took a deep breath. „You good?“ he spoke but you just replied by bringing his tip back to your lips.

„Mh good girl.“ he moaned out as you kitten licked his tip.

„On your stomach babygirl.“ he groaned after you had sucked on his tip for a bit.

He got off of you and stood up to get a condom from the drawer.

Meanwhile you lied down on your naked stomach and waited for him.

„Open your legs for papi.“ he growled as you felt a harsh smack on your left ass cheek. That made you moan out in pain but it also felt good. It wasnt hardcore pain, but you did know it would leave a spot.

You opened your legs and lifted your hips up a little.

„Yes good.“ you heard his deep voice behind you.

Arón grabbed a pillow and placed it under your hips for support. „Ready for my cock honey?“ he asked.

„Yes papi.“ you moaned as a response before he slowly slid his hard cock into your trembling pussy. „Ah fuck you‘re always so tight.“ he whispered and grabbed your hips roughly.

Without hesitation he started slamming into you as if there was no tomorrow. With harsh thrusts he kept hitting your g-spot, making your eyes roll back and your mouth fall open.

Arón was moaning loudly as you could already feel him getting closer.

He changed his angle a little by aiming higher, laying down on your butt.

„Babe.“ he growled and suddenly grabbed you by your hair.

He he never done that before.

And he knew you didnt like it since your head was sensitive.

But that moment you were so turned on, you didnt even think of stopping his actions.

Arón fucked you roughly and fast while you were moaning out his name or cursed. You could hear him panting against your back.

„Im coming baby.“ he groaned and slammed into you with no mercy. You couldnt keep it any longer either.

Two last thrusts and he had you coming for him. Your body started shaking as your orgasm went through your body like lightening.

„Yes baby come on.“ he smacked your butt once again until he came as well. „Fuck yes.“ he almost screamed and jerked your head up on your hair.

It hurt but you were too concentrated on your own orgasm you didnt realize.

Your back was up against his chest while his cock was twitching in you, spilling his cum into the condom.

„Ah fuck.“ he breathed out as he calmed down from his intense orgasm.

You were pretty exhausted too and just expected him to cuddle you and finish the movie but he suddenly whispered:“On your back.“

You were confused but followed his commands and lied down.

„Put your arms behind your back. No touching until I come back.“

By nodding you agreed and he left the room without saying any more.

You waited patiently for him to come back and it was really hard not to touch yourself. You just came, yes, but your clit hadnt gotten any of his attention yet. And usually he ate you out before sex or at least rubbed your clit while he was fucking you.

It took him about 5 minutes to finally return to the bedroom, he was now wearing jeans, but his upper body was still exposed.

„Did you touch yourself baby?“

You shook your head truthfully and spoke:“No I didnt.“

-„Promise?“ he asked and stood in front of the bed looking at you.

„I promise daddy.“

He nodded and finally climbed inbetween your legs.

„Good girl.“

He spread your legs carefully before finally attaching his lips to your thighs, placing soft kisses everywhere.

This boy could really fuck you rough and tell you you‘re his baby a second later.

Your hands were still behind your back, just as he had told you to, while his tongue was tracing circles on your thighs and lower stomach.

„Arón.“ you moaned out, seeking pleasure.

He loved being called daddy or papi, but hearing you say his name was his biggest turn on. He loved your voice, and when it said his given name he got reminded how much he loves you really.

„You sure you deserve this for being such a bitch to me before?“ he played.

„Arón please.“ you exclaimed and looked down at him.

He was just laying there, looking up at you, no part of his body touching yours anymore.

„You know what. Nah. Maybe tomorrow.“

[heroicvilliansometimes]

First Days

Note: I'm sorry I procrastinated

I wake to smack the alarm off as I stretch the sleep out of my bones

"Y/N GET UP IT'S TIME FOR SCHOOL" Mom shouts from downstairs

"YES MA'AM" I pull the covers off of me as I hop off the bed walking towards my drawers

"What should I wear today" looking around I see some pants and my ice cream hoodie

"Oh yeah I gotta where this." Checking myself out in the mirror as I brush my hair I said

"I'm finna be the coolest ice in the freezer" checking myself out again I get my brush to sing

"Let it go let it go can't-

Hey Y/N have you seen my brush-" as my sister and I held eye contact a blush began to form on my face

"No I haven't-

What in the world are you doing" She says while in a fit of laughter

"Nothing now get out

Are you singing Let it go

"No and didn't I say get out" I huffed as I pushed her out of my room smiling to myself I looked down at my hand as I held her brush

"But I have seen my microphone." Running down the stairs I started to smell eggs

"Oh yeah" I thought, reaching the end I saw my Dad on his computer working as usual and Mom making breakfast

"Y/N go grab some plates"

"Yes ma'am" as I grabbed six plates I giggled when I heard my sister and brother coming down the stairs arguing

"I know you took my brush Kyle so can you please just give it back

Calm down Karen I don't have your brush so stop bothering me"

"Mom Kyle called me a Karen and he won't give me back my brush" my Mother turned around amusement on her face

"Kyle don't call your sister a Karen and please give her back her brush"

"Mom I'm serious I don't have her brush" my sister turned her head towards him in disbelief

"Well if you don't have my brush then who does

I don't know Rebecca" Kyle replied angrily. Putting the plates by mom she started to slide breakfast on to each plate

"Come and get it kids" grabbing a plate and picking a seat my dad moved his laptop so mom could place a plate in front of him

"Now before we eat we have to say grace"

"Yes sir" my siblings and I said in unison grabbing each others hands Rebecca started us off

"Oh lord we thank you for this food-" as she was talking I began to space out

"I wonder if today's going to be a good day" I thought

"I hope today's a good day I hope I meet lots of people who I wish would like me and I hope today I don't get into any trouble and maybe I meet somebody cute" I started to blush at the thought.

“Amen” Rebecca says

“Amen” I quickly reply, while eating my eggs I remembered I have still have Rebecca’s brush so unintentionally I began to giggle

“What’s so funny Y/N” dad asks

“Oh um nothing dad”

“No what’s up Y/N"

"It's just I might know where Becca's brush is." Rebecca lifted her head hope written on her face

"Really where" she said cheerfully

"In my room" the hope on her face quickly switched to anger

"I KNEW YOU HAD MY-

Don't yell at your brother Rebecca" Dad said anger in his voice

"Sorry dad now why didn't you tell me you had my brush"

"Because you laughed at me for singing Let it go"

"Are you serious"

"Yes" Rebecca turned her head to Mom

"Don't look at me Rebecca I didn't laugh at him" Rebecca had an annoyed expression on her face

"I'm sorry I laughed at you may I have my brush back" she reluctantly said

"Thank you" I said. As I finished breakfast I put my plate in the sink

"Uh excuse me" Mom said

"Don't worry Mom I'll wash them when I get back from school"

"Ok now don't forget"

"Yes Ma'am"

"Now I'm heading off to work" she said while grabbing her computer bag

"Oh and today you'll take the bus home"

"Ok love you Mom"

"Love you to sweetie" she kisses my forhead

"Hey what about us" my siblings said

"You guys are to old for forhead kisses or that's what y'all said at your homecoming dance"

"But mom we were just joking right Becca"

"Yeah" she replied hastily

"Fine come here." She kisses their foreheads then walks towards the door

"Bye my gremlins"

"Bye mom" as she closes the door dad checks his watch

"Oh crap you guys are going to be late" rushing to look for his keys Kyle and Rebecca glance at each other then chuckle

"Looking for these Dad" they say in unison as Kyle pulls the keys out his pocket. Sighing Dad sticks his hand out

"One day I'm going to lose my car and instead of calling the police I'm going to call you two" giggling they hand him back his keys

"See you later sport" Dad says

"Yeah I hope you have fun" Kyle interjects

"And if you get bullied call me and I'll give them a word or two" Rebecca says

"Bye and yeah right Becca." I walk to the window and watch them pull out the drive way I pull out my phone to check the time

"Sweet I have time to watch tv" hopping on the couch I turn on the tv and switch it to my favorite show.

"I can't believe he's not the father" I say in shock as time passes I check the time and jump off the couch when seeing that the bus arrives in 5 minutes.

"Crap crap crap how I could time possibly pass that fast" running to the bus stop I see two people standing there and as I got closer their features started to become more defined

"No I'm telling you man there is no way Batman can beat Superman" one said

"Oh shut up George" the other said. Finally reaching them I leaned on the stop sign panting like a dog

"FINALLY" I screamed

"I'M FINALLY HERE"

"Yeah good job to bad your in third place"

"George"

"I'm sorry" looking up I see a two guys a short male brunette and a taller one

"I apologize if I scared you guys" glancing at each other the taller sticks his hand out

"It's ok and my name is George Luz" shaking his hand I reply

"I'm Y/N L/N" turning my eyes towards the shorter male realization grows on his face

"Oh um I'm Frank Perconte" smiling we wait for the bus to show up

"So are you new" George asks

"Yes I am"

"What grade"

"9th grade" jumping at my words George and Frank look at me

"Wow" they say together

"What" I nervously said

"Im sorry it's just your not annoying like usual 9th graders" Offended by his words I glare at him

"No that's not what I meant

Then what do you mean George

I just meant

George

Yeah Frank

Shut up

Ok"

"What he means is that you're very mature for your age"

"Yeah that's what I meant" George mumbles, Frank glares at him shutting him up. As the bus arrives we hop on and not expecting the loud chatter I started to back up

"Hey man start walking" Franks says while pushing me

"Sorry" as I started walking looking side and side for a spot I stop realizing I reached the end of the bus and turning to my left I see a guy with light blond hair and very light blue eyes

"You can sit with me if you want" as a blush formed on my face I said

"Sure." Sitting down I look down at my hands hoping he doesn't acknowledge me

"My names Lynn but people call me Buck" I don't look up

"My names Y/N"

"Cool so are you new here"

"How can you tell"

"Well usually people know that athletes and popular kids sit in the back" looking up and into the aisle I noticed Frank and George are sitting near the front

"My bad"

"It's ok" looking back at my hands I felt Buck leaning on my shoulder

"So like are you shy or you just find me ugly"

"I'm not shy and I don't think your ugly" I mumbled

"Then why do you keep looking down"

"It's just your eyes are so light and um serious I'm afraid to look up." I yelped as I felt his hands on my face pulling me to look at him

"I'm sorry if I intimidate you but I don't bite promise" feeling heat rush to my face I pull my hood over my face and tighten it

"Buck you can't just pull my face like that" I squeaked

"Why did it hurt"

"No it's just....don't do it please"

"I'm sorry." As time passed I had pulled my hood down and was looking at my hands again glancing up so often to check if Buck was angry

"I can see you looking at me" jumping at his words I looked down

"It's fine Y/N"

"Ok." My eyes looked at his arm as it was the only thing keeping him from rubbing against my shoulder so taking a deep breath I put my head on his arm grunting he turned his head to me then smiled

"You're cute"

"Thank you"

"No problem." Moving his arm surprising me he wrapped it around my waist and pulled me close to him

"You know I wouldn't mind if you started sitting in the back only if you sat by me" he says confidently

"Ok"

"Then it's settled you'll only sit by me for the rest of year"

"Hold on what" laughing at my reaction he grabs my hand and squeezes it

"You don't like sitting by me"

"No it's just I appreciate the choice of my own seat"

"Ok where do you want to sit" feeling flustered at my answer I whispered

"You"

"I'm sorry what I can't hear you" he says seriously

"You ok"

"Then it really is settled."

"So what grade"

"9th"

"12th"

"Cool" the bus stops

"Ok kids we're here" getting up I realize Buck still has my hand so trying to let go he smirks

"You know this entire bus ride has been me making you flustered"

"That's not true" I hastily reply

"Whatever you say" he says while getting up. Pulling my hand he leads me down the aisle eyes following us finally reaching the door we walked down the steps

"I see you made a new friend" George says

"Be quiet George" I mumbled

"What it's true" Buck says, glaring at him I yank my hand away from him putting it in my hoodie pocket. Walking away I heard chuckling

"Shut the fuck up both of you"

"Sorry Buck" continuing to walk I hear footsteps getting closer

"I'm sorry"

"It's fine Buck" I felt him pulling my arm so eventually I took my hand out my pocket and grabbed his hand

"So what's your first class"

"Home Ect"

"Awesome me to" whirling my head up I ask

"How"

"They don't separate grades for electives"

"Oh" arriving at Home Ect I take a deep breath

"Relax you'll befine"

"If you say so" I open the door walking in with Buck

"Welcome to Home Ect I'll be your teacher Mrs Stevens."

[robinskalechip]

home - chapter four

robin buckley x reader

a/n: send me hc requests! also i feel like i say that they smile or laugh or chuckle or grin or etc a lot but they’re happy and in love so just go with it

warnings: language

not my gif!

chapter four - wake up call

robin woke up to the sound of her alarm going off, indicating that it was unfortunately the morning and time to go to the hell hole known as hawkins high. she stayed laying in bed for a few moments before sitting up and rubbing her eyes. she got up and walked to the bathroom, eyes practically still shut. turning the water on for the shower, she began to brush her teeth as she let the water warm up.

after a fifteen minute shower, she retrieved the day’s outfit and displayed it on her bed. she put on her jeans and bra and was getting ready to put on a black bon jovi tee shirt until she heard something from her window. she turned to see small masses hitting her window.

she approached the window to investigate and saw her, dressed in jeans, a hawkins pullover sweatshirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows, a pair of minimal round glasses and her hair in a messy updo. and of course she was wearing that smile that made almost everyone melt. robin opened her window that faced the front yard and was met with her new favorite pair of eyes.

“morning sunshine”, sofia was bright, even in the early hours of the day.

“can i ask why your performing a massacre on my window at this early of an hour”

“you forgot your bike in my car, figured you’d need it back”

robin couldn’t believe she had forgotten her bike. it was out of her character to forget something so important.

“actually, do you want a ride to school?” sofia seemed different when she said this and robin took notice, she seemed nervous.

robin smiled at her, “give me like five minutes”

the two held eye contact until robin closed the window and hurriedly got dressed.

after four minutes of finishing up the rest of her daily routine as quickly as possible, robin headed downstairs to meet her mom with an apple ready for robin. she took it and gave her mother a kiss goodbye as she sped to leave the house.

sofia was lost in thought as she read from a plain black and white composition book until her thoughts were disturbed when robin’s presence took over her attention. sofia closed the book and smiled at robin, “ready?”

“ready? yes. willing? no”

sofia laughed as she started the car engine and then reached into the backseat, “did you eat?”

she presented a bag that contained a bagel and a cup of mixed fruit, “i dont eat much in the mornings, makes me feel sick.” she took the bagel out and tore it in half, offering the half to robin who took it without hesitation.

“im the same way, my mom always just gives me a piece of fruit while she makes my dad a whole buffet before they go to work together”

the two talked amongst themselves about films robin had recently seen and the ones sofia was planning to see when they were released movie junkies in love and promising each other to go together to certain movies. they also talked about the kids and how they were doing, ie how max and lucas are the most chaotic of couples and mike still calls el every single day to talk for hours on end

sofia reached into the back seat once again, this time presenting the notebook she had been reading when robin first entered the car, “will wrote to me once a week. he wrote down what was going on so i wouldn’t miss a thing” she smiled fondly as she remembered the young boy who was like her younger brother. “mike said will sent it to him whenever he found out i was back. he gave me the byers’ number too but i don’t know if i could make it through a phone call without crying honestly”

“did he mean a lot to you”

“he was my heart. everything i did was for him. i wanted to set a good example for him. he felt like such an outsider, even with the other boys and i just-“

she took a moment to breathe and collect herself before her emotions could take over, “i saw so much of myself in him”

robin looked down and reached for sofia’s hand, the two then looking up at the same exact time to meet each other’s eyes

“it wasn’t until i got to know him that i understood what my mom used to say to me, ‘ti darei il sole se potessi id give you the sun if i could’”

sofia began to translate, “it means-“

robin cut her off, “id give you the sun if i could”

this was sofia’s moment where her heart went fucking insane and she was ready to kiss robin at the drop of a hat.

“i never understood it until then. you could give someone all of the stars in the galaxies but none of them will shine as bright as the sun. none of them will provide you with as much warmth and support and light as the sun. will was my light”

“maybe you can take a road trip, go see him?”

“will you come with me?”

robin smiled, her heart fluttering faster than ever, “of course, anything to get out of here. i can ask for next weekend off?”

sofia nodded as she began to back out of the driveway of robin’s house

as she drove the short drive to hawkins high she began to ask robin about steve, “he’s different ya know”

robin was confused at first, “who?”

“steve, he’s less...douchey”

robin chuckled, “he’s still a dingus but he’s definitely matured in his own way”

sofia could not believe the words being used to describe steve, HER steve, “growing up he always got so many girls’ attention and it took him so long to actually get some game but somehow i think he’s lost it since graduating”

robin smiled, “are you aware of my important data i keep at the store?”

“important data?”

“swing by later, i’ll show you”

sofia parked in her old spot as robin began to gather her things and then turned to the girl in the driver’s seat who was now leaned back and looking at her with a smile on her face

“what? do i have cream on my lip again?”

a small chuckle escaped from her lips, “no, just thinking, i’ll see you later. i can pick you up if you want. after all i still have your bike in the back”

“i’d like that” as robin was about to leave but she stopped and stared at the girl for a moment. all she wanted to do was kiss her. it felt almost instinctive to part ways with one but she contained herself like she had done since the moment she met her. instead, she flashed her another smile as she got out of the car.

only two seconds after the door closed, sofia noticed robin forgot her apple her mom gave her that she never ended up eating thanks to sofia’s breakfast catering

she open the door in a hurried manner and called out robin’s name and causing her to jump and turn her head back to meet sofia’s eyes as she held up the red fruit, “you might get hungry later”

robin walked back to the driver’s side of the car to retrieve the fruit from sofia, their fingers slightly brushing up against each other as they partook in the exchange and looked up to meet each others eyes; the earth and the sea coming together as robin’s blue and sofia’s green locked

it wasn’t until their moment was cut off with a familiar yelling, “SOFIA”

quickly followed by an ambush of kids running towards the two girls

mike and dustin were smiling at the two girls while max and lucas followed behind them, arguing before sofia could intervene to see what the conflict was

“hey hey what are you two yelling about before first period has even started”

lucas looked at sofia, using his eyes to beg for back up, “tell her that new coke is better, tell her”

sofia looked at mike who mouthed, “its not” which made her giggle

“i’m sorry lucas, i can’t help you there. i don’t drink coke and you know i am an honest woman at all times but im SURE she’s right” she bent down slightly and motioned for lucas to come closer as she began to whisper , “they’re always right, especially one like max who is smarter than all of you combined” she paused for a moment “well dustin is close behind but i still stand by my statement” she winked at max who smiled at her.

max liked sofia, even though she had only just met her. lucas had told her a lot about her and sofia even promised to do a movie night with her

mike was about to walk off until he jumped towards sofia, “hEY do you think you can give us a ride home? my movie night isn’t until next week”

robin and sofia looked at each other, now with the younger ones in between them. they smiled at each other. they have already made it a thing to communicate with their eyes

“how’s this? im taking robin to work already so i will take the four of you with me if you can all squish together in the backseat, and mike” he looked way too excited when she turned her attention to him “we can do our movie night tonight but we have to finish in time for me to get robin after her shift”

mike nodded with such enthusiasm, it made max laugh

“now go all of you before you’re late” sofia said, looking like a proud mother sending her kids off

all four children ran off, yelling their goodbyes and waving their hands, dustin making a heart with his hands and screaming “I LOVE YOU” the purest of children

robin laughed as she stepped back to her original spot close to sofia, still eyeing the children as they ran off, “be honest, which one is your favorite”

sofia made a sarcastic and overdramatized shocked face, “a mother never has favorites..”

robin gave her a “that’s bullshit” look

“but will, its always been will. dustin has his moments”

robin smiled, “i figured”

“you should probably go too though. i’d hate to be the reason you’re late”

robin had the erge to kiss her again. she held back again.

not yet. not now.

next chapter

[disloopy]

the heart is deceiving pt.2

bloo

genre: angst, smut

word count: 1.8k

a/n. firstly i apologize for how long this part is i just rlly wanna add everyth and it’ll all make sense in the end ok. n e ways regarding the whole bloo scandal and stuff idk cuz im not rlly a whole ass bloo stan aight so im gonna kinda stay away from that until he or someone clears stuff up so i dont do the whole “cancelled/uncancelled” thing lol k read

LAST a/n i promise. i changed it to first person pov cuz bitch i wrote the entire thing in first person on accident and i just cant deal w this any more

LIPS. daniel's were dripping with ambrosia. kissing him was like tasting an eternal summer, an immortal hour of golden skies, humid nights, honey kissed skin bronze and glistening as we moved against each other.

in this short span of time, daniel seemed to know everything about me; what i loved, what i hated, what got my heart racing and my breathing heavy, he knew what turned me on and he did it with finesse.

seeing him sit up, red marks on his back as he leaned against the bed frame and lit up a cigarette, felt like a scene taken straight from an angst filled movie. i wanted to admire every aspect of him; the way his damp hair stuck to his forehead, the purple bruises forming dark clouds over the moon tattoo, a cigarette dangling between his swollen pink lips.

i curled under the white sheets, so different from my own patterned ones, feeling immersed in the comforting smell of him. he rolled out of bed to get me my jacket to cover myself with. "this is yours," i told him when he handed it to me.

"what's mine is yours, baby." daniel laid down next to me and i wrapped my fingers around the golden necklace that hung loosely around his neck, pulling his face closer to kiss his lips once more. perhaps the taste of his lips was like the food of the greek gods ― pleasurable and addictive.

when my father called that night, i let another lie escape my dirty lips, telling him i had left the party and decided to stay over with jojo. "i'll see you tomorrow then, baby. love you."

"i love you too, daddy." why was i compelled to do the worst things when it came to daniel? i didn't know, but i liked it.

daniel raised his eyebrows as i hung up the phone. "oh, i thought you were talking to me when you said that." i clicked my tongue and laid my throbbing head on the pillow. it's like my lie came to life.

"do you think anyone heard us?" i asked daniel, looking up at him. the smoke seeping out of his lips enveloped my face for a second, and i indulged in the suffocating feeling.

"who cares? they'll only hear your moans... the real sight is for me to see."

he talked like that usually,  but he was definitely wasted tonight. he tried to put his arms around me but i rolled onto my side, away from him. "what's wrong, baby? you didn't like it?" daniel rested his head on my shoulder and i reached up, running my fingers through his hair.

"will you forget everything in the morning."

daniel scoffed, his breath tickling my skin. "i never forget... but in case i do, then we can do it all over again and it'll feel like the first time." i laughed softly, and then turned to look at him, running my fingers over the birthmark on his cheek and over his lips, just like i had fantasized about doing on more nights than one.

daniel just parted his lips, taking my finger into his mouth, his eyes unwavering as they stared into mine. daniel was everything i wanted to be, everything i needed him to be; fearless, emotional, dominant.

"do you... really like me?"

"you talk too much," daniel groans, lighting up another cigarette. "i do... but if you ever end up in my bed again, don't think about asking me such a question."

i received stares when daniel dropped me off at school the next day, in his black bentley with the roof down and the early morning breeze running through my hair, much like his fingers had done just the previous night.

"see you later, baby?" said daniel, pressing a kiss on my lips that caused everything to somehow fall into place. i would leave the shadow of his lips on mine, getting me through the day.

it didn't take long for jojo to point out the band-aids on placed carefully on my knees caused by the rough work of last night. i didn't expect anything less from daniel.

"was it really like that?"

i nodded, taking a long chug from my water bottle. "it was like that. all fucking night long. he didn't even let me get on the bed until he was done."

"my, my, my, it's always the ones who look innocent that are the most freaky," jojo remarked, shaking her head. "and while you were getting it on with daniel, tattoo face has been blowing up my phone."

"jinyoung?"

"whatever his name is."

sometimes i wish that i could be like jojo - so caught up in her own world, independent, free of need to feel important or appreciated. maybe that's why people were just so drawn to her. i, on the other hand, craved attention and daniel didn't mind giving it to me. we fit each other.

TOGETHER. that's the way we were mostly found. tangled in between daniel's sheets, wrapped in each other's arms, clinging to one other ― where one went, the other followed. his friends soon became mine and my one (1) friend became theirs. just like that we became connected and feeling that connection was something worth risking for in life.

"mm baby wake up... i have to take you to school." the low, gravelly voice stirred me from my sleep but i didn't have enough motivation to open my eyes. last night, i had sneakily set an alarm on daniel's phone titled "wake y/n up for school" ― not that i couldn't have done it myself, i just thought it would be nice to be woken up by daniel this morning.

i stretched out my arms and laid my head atop his. "i don't wanna go to school," i murmured softly with a yawn. daniel grinned and snuggled closer to me, his arms snaking around my waist so that my back was pressed against his bare chest.

"okay."

my eyes fluttered open as i yawned again. "you're supposed to tell me that i have to go."

daniel propped himself up on his elbow, brushing the strands of hair out of my eyes. "why would i do that? i want to lie in bed with you all day long, maybe fuck you back to sleep." it may have been too early in the morning to be affected by daniel's words but they hovered around my body, squeezing my insides right down to my very core.

i reached up, wrapping my arms around his neck and he lowered his head, trailing kisses down my jaw and shoulder. daniel could never waste enough time getting me undressed, hands ghosting along my skin, his lips worshiping me like i was something divine. my fingers running through his hair and his fingers complimenting all my curves and edges.

between us was electricity and friction, silence being broken only by my soft whimpers for i could no longer handle the enticing touch of his body and craved more than just that.

then a sudden interruption came with the opening of the door and nicholas's voice informing us that they were going out to eat breakfast. "what the fuck, nick!" daniel exclaimed, throwing a pillow at his friend before covering me with his body. "do you mind?"

nicholas just yawned, bored. "how am i supposed to know she slept over?"

"as if you couldn't hear us last night."

"ok just get ready, we're leaving now." he shook his head and walked out the door. i wanted daniel to get closer, to bury my face in his tousled hair, his hands to dutifully commend my body. but instead he sat up, checking his phone.

i sighed, wrapping the blanket around my bare chest. "you didn't lock your door?"

daniel smiled sheepishly. "i guess i forgot?"

"or did you want someone to find us?" i asked seriously. "you act like our sex life is to be shared with the entire world."

"shouldn't it be?"

"only if you wanna put a label on it," i murmured quietly so he wouldn't be able to hear me. daniel was so obviously into exhibition and i found it strange how he didn't mind his friends walking in on us, knowing about us, what we chose to do together.

daniel talked about things while we were in the car; things i only cared about because he cared about them. somehow what was special to him meant something to me because it was a side of him i never knew existed, yet loved all the same. and because his bros were a big part of his life, they became a part of mine - like i finally found a proper family.

"hey - um," daniel started when we stopped in front of my school building. i stopped in the process of slipping on my bag to turn and look at him. "i wanted to ask you something."

i became interested. "what is it?"

daniel sighed, looking down at his lip as if he was unsure about something. "i just thought... let's make it official? do you want to be my girlfriend?" i didn't know what to say. i assumed we were already dating with the amount of time we spent with each other, on his bed but i guess he felt differently.

when i didn't reply, daniel continued. "i mean, i've been hooking up with girls but i'm sick of them coming onto me like i've got nothing better to do... it's different with you."

"oh..." i faltered, knowing i should have expected something like that. it was just the most daniel thing to do.

"do you not wanna?"

"no! i mean, yes... yes of course i want to be your girlfriend," i told him, lacing my fingers through his. "but... we haven't even been on a proper date yet."

daniel grinned, pulling me closer just to press his lips against mine, tugging on my bottom lip before i moved away. "then where would you like to go? hm, baby?"

i thought about it for a second. "monet's diner? it's like at the edge of downtown."

"of all the nice places in ventura, you want to go to a diner?"

unlike daniel, i still wasn't familiar with the boujee lifestyle that came like second nature to him. i've never owned anything expensive and never wanted more than what life had to offer me. maybe being with daniel would mean having to change all that.

"the last time i ate there was with my mom," i explained, looking down at my schoolbag, playing with zipper. "i just never had someone else to go there with... until now."

daniel reached up and touched my cheek, probably the most gentle gesture of affection he'd ever shown. "then we'll go there."

[avani008]

For 5 headcanons, could you please write more about Kanta, Durdhara, or Bala with her husband Kumar Verma?

Kanta (previous here)

1. When Kanta returns from the mountains at last, it is her sister-in-law who she goes to see first. “Tread carefully,” the steward who guides her warns; “the Empress...the Empress-that-was is of course displeased. She’s thrown others from her chambers on the flimsiest pretext.”

Kanta frowns. “She’ll see me,” she says with quiet conviction, and the steward, ashamed, falls silent. 

Far from throwing her out, Draupadi throws her arms about Kanta’s neck. “It’s all right,’ Kanta soothes, even though Draupadi does not so much as sniffle into her shoulder. “I’m here.”

2. She visits her brothers next, their faces still so familiar. 

“It is good you came now,” Bhima says with terrible sarcasm. “In a day’s time, you might have missed us together; we are to return to the wood at the King’s command.”

Yudhisthira flinches, but Kanta doesn’t comfort him. 

“Tell me,” she says, “what must be done next.”

3. Mother Kunti blames herself.

“I promised the Princess of Panchal an empire when she wed my sons,” she mourns, “and look what she has now instead: a throne of twigs!”

“I promised myself to protect her as I would you or my brothers,” Kanta replies quietly. Her face betrays nothing, and yet Kunti’s gaze flickers anxiously in her direction.

“If I had been with her, Dushasana would not live to the results of his actions today,” Kanta whispers, guilt lending venom to her voice, and Kunti strokes her hair gently. 

4. “Will you go with them?” Mother--Radha, the first and best mother Kanta has ever known--asks, and Kanta shakes her head. 

“I have shared one exile with my brothers,” she replies. “I do not care to share another.”

“Then--” Mother hesitates “--you will wish to reside your royal mother?”

Kanta looks at her to laugh for what seems like the first time in entirely too long. “Dear one,” she says with real affection, “if I must wait fourteen years for the war that will be my revenge, who else might I do so than with you?”

5. Radha’s house does not put her in contact with the princes of Hastinapur very often, but neither does it protect her from them. At last the encounter Kanta has dreaded for decades is here; Prince Duryodhana stands before her.

“Come back,” he begs, in the same tone he once used to beg, Marry me. “Who are they to you, when we have meant so much to each other? Not enough that you didn’t run from them not a month after they wed, and stay away for fifteen years since.”

(He has not married, after all these years. She wishes she was not so aware of this fact, or that that familiar ache start anew in her chest.)

“And how long has it been since I ran from you?” she retorts, because it is always easier to be cruel. They will meet, sooner or later, or enemies on the battlefield; better that Duryodhana accustom himself to it now.

But he offers none of the sharp counters she remembers so well, and his eyes still follow her as she turns away.

Kanta despairs. 

Durdhara (previous here)

1. At last, Durdhara decides, Bhima is ready. He might never be the sort to pay polished comments or hold his tongue, but Durdhara calculates he might, after all, pass for a prince if one doesn’t look too carefully. 

“Very kind of you,” Bhima drawls when she tells him this, and Durdhara frowns. Sarcasm she hadn’t bothered to instruct him in, but naturally in this he would be a prodigy. With time, she might grow accustomed to it.

2. ...She does not.

But eventually the urge to strangle him for his stupidity ebbs, and Durdhara accepts this as the best she might expect. 

3. “I’ve helped you,” she pronounces, “now you must help me.”

Bhima, to give him his due, doesn’t pretend ignorance. But he does look quite alarmed and announce hurriedly: “I won’t kill anyone for you!”

Durdhara huffs with exasperation. “As though I would ask such a thing!”

(And she wouldn’t. Not really.)

Bhima’s face relaxes and brightens with curiosity. “What, then, did you have in mind?”

4. When Bhima sends her brothers tumbling from the trees, Durdhara hoots with laughter. 

“Serves them right,” Bhima tells her later, “for being so unkind to you--”

His eyes are dark with indignation; poor Bhima, beloved by his own brothers, has never known the cruelty that being her father’s disregarded daughter brings Durdhara daily. 

“So it does,” Durdhara sniffs, and pats his arm in thanks. 

“It doesn’t matter,” he replies gruffly. “You’re not alone now. You’ve me and my brothers instead.”

So she does. Durdhara tries--and fails--not to smile.

5. When she is twelve, her Uncle Shakuni comes to visit them. 

The rest of her siblings don’t know how happy Mother is to see him, come all the way from Gandhara, but Durdhara does; and while all her brothers and Dushala scatter to follow Yuyutsu on his latest escapade, Durdhara stays behind to sit by Mother’s side and listen to his stories. 

She likes Uncle Shakuni, who pays more attention to her than that maid’s son, unlike everyone else. She likes Uncle Shakuni who tells her she is worth a thousand of any other and looks at her with pride glinting in his steely eyes, unlike everyone else. 

He is the one who takes her aside and teaches her the foods most conducive to concealing poison: venison, wine, and sweet kheer. 

“Do you know how to make kheer, my child?” Uncle Shakuni asks, apropros of nothing. “No finer present you might make your father’s bastard to show him your love--with this spice, too, brought directly from Gandhara.”

Durdhara reaches for the vial, knowing exactly what her uncle intends. But it is true, too, that she wonders suddenly what Bhima might think, and what he would say, and how he would never understand after all. 

No harm in only keeping the poison safe for now, she tells herself fiercely; and who knows what tomorrow might bring?

Bala & Kumar Varma (previous here)

1. And then comes the day that the ministers begin to buzz with questions about an heir. 

Mother might wax lyrical about the joys of motherhood, the myriad wonders of pregnancy, but Bala takes no more than an instant to consider swollen ankles and an eternally upset stomach before she knows what her answer will be.

“The Prince Consort and I,” she says sweetly, “will choose an heir worthy of the throne ourselves.”

2. “A pity,” the Chief Minister says, shaking his head, “that the Princess Ambika will likely never bear a child. He should, of course, be the obvious first choice to consider.”

An image swims before Bala’s eyes, of a child cursed with Ambika’s unflagging enthusiasm and energy and Devasena’s reckless stupidity. 

Her heart stops at the very thought; “Yes,” she murmurs when at last she can speak without shuddering, “a pity indeed.” 

3. Every noble family in Mahishmati parades their children before Bala, and none of them meet with her approval. 

One is squint-eyed, the other too prone to swoon at the slightest sight of blood, and the last has a sense of fashion that even Ambika would scorn--she can hardly believe where they all come from. 

“You must choose eventually,” Mother says, and Bala tries her best not to make a face in her direction.

4. The queue of candidates becomes ever longer, but, sadly no more promising. 

Bala decides she’s had enough when she looks up to find: “Sethupathy?”

“I assure you,” he bows low, “that my heart is devoted only to the service of our noble country, and that I should be honored to call you ‘Mother.’” He bows again, and looks up at her with what he must suppose an expression of filial piety.

“Sethupathy,” Bala says, as gently as she can manage, “Sethupathy, you are older than I am.”

“So?”

5. When she comes across her husband in the gardens, Bala’s temper is understandably short. When he begins, “I have been putting great thought towards the problem before us--” her hopes sink.

“Surely, my dear,” she hastens, “there’s no need--”

“No, no, no!” He waves his hands in the air. “I have thought about it all. This is Vaishali,” he indicates the child who toddles in his wake. “She’s the daughter of one of Devasena’s old friends, while she and her husband lived, and has nowhere else to go.”

Bala sniffs. “There is no end of orphanages in the city,” she points out.

Kumar Varma ignores this in his enthusiasm. “But only think! If she is from Kuntala, none of your nobles could object, could they?’

True, Bala thinks, and studies the brat quickly. She’s quiet, which speaks in her favor, and well-dressed, which does just as well, and--

“What,” she asks, very seriously, “are your thoughts about learning to become a warrior worthy of the throne?”

The girl’s face brightens suddenly; she waves her arms about, not unlike Kumar Varma a few moments earlier. 

“SMASH!” she says, and Bala’s heart is full. 

[mwdders]

Hello

Requested: No, but send me requests.

Warnings: swearing, abuse, fighting, toxic behaviour.

Harry Hook x reader

Word Count: 3,084

Plot: This is based off the song Everytime by Ariana Grande. It’s about being in a toxic relationship, and even though they know they’re no good for each other they always go back to each other no matter what.

—

Waiting at the door, it seems like forever, I was suppose to be meeting Harry nearly 2 hours ago. Having the feeling he wasn’t going to show again I storm off and back to my room.

I get tired of your no shows

Unlocking my dorm, I huff and walk over to my bed, Jane my room mate looks up at me.

“Did he not show again?”

“No he didn’t.” I fall back onto my bed. “Am i doing something wrong? That’s 3 times this week he’s not shown.”

“Sweetie you’re not doing anything wrong. Harry’s clearly just not got his priories straight.” She looks at me sympathetically.

“I’m going to find him.” I stand up and quickly change from the clothes I was wearing for our date into a black dress, pink jacket and black heeled ankle boots.

“Is that wise? I mean you’re angry, he might have a good excuse.”

“No, he won’t. I already know what’s happened. I bet I’ll find him in Uma’s office.” Without giving Jane the chance to reply I’m out the door.

Walking down the corridor I walk past people staring at me, I may be an Auradon kid but i am not a princess and certainly do not act like one.

Walking to Uma’s dorm, I knock on the door next to it, which is her office. “Who is it?”

“Y/n. Open up.” The door opens and Uma stands in front of me. “Have you seen Harry?”

“No, sorry. Why?”

“He never showed for our date and I waited 2 hours.” For a second she looks sympathetic but that quickly vanishes. “Huh, maybe he did say something about training?” She puts her fingers to her chin as if she’s thinking.

“No games today Uma. I’m not in the mood.”

“Like I said, try the gym.” She slams the door in my face and I swear I could rip her head off her body.

Sauntering away I make my way towards the gym. Pushing the double doors open probably a little too dramatically, I find Harry training with the rest of the crew but also Jay.

“There you are.”

“Princess.” He smiles at me but keeps training.

“Forget something?” I walk over to him my heels clicking on the tiled floor. “I don’t think so.” “Oh I think you did.” I lean against a pillar and cross my arms. “Nothing comes to mind?” He questions looking at me, I raise my eyebrows, he can’t be serious. “Sweetheart, I’ve been waiting 2 hours for you.” “I’m still confused? I’ve been in the gym, every Thursday 3-5 is my gym time.” “No baby, you were suppose to meet me for our date.” He stops what he’s doing and turns to me. “No that’s tomorrow.” He shakes his head. “Harry, it was today.” Trying not to get angry, I breathe a little deeper, “Y/n it’s tomorrow. I’m certain.” I stand in front of him forcing him to stop.

“No. It was today, and you left me waiting for 2 hours. I told you, that Thursday 3-4 is our weekly date. You’ve not showed up three times now because we keep changing it to suit you.”

“Geez you should calm down, I’m sorry I forgot baby but you don’t control my life.”

You get tired of my control

“Everyone out!” I yell, my patience at breaking point. “What? You can’t just kick us out.” Someone says, I turn to them, it being one of Uma’s pirates. “Get the fuck out now before I pull your tongue out your throat and shove it up your ass.” I yell causing everyone to run out the room.

“Y/n what are ya doing love?” “I’ve had enough of you Harry! You never show up, you except me to revolve my life around you, you never consider my life or plans, it’s like you don’t even care for me!”

“I do! It’s just I’m my own person, you try to control me like I’m some perfect prince and I ain’t. I have duties, to myself and to Uma”

“Here we go again, Uma this Uma that. All ya ever do is talk about that bitch!”

“Don’t you call her that!” Harry grabs my jacket by the collar pulling me into him forcefully. “Get your hands off me.” I shove him away and hit him. “Never ever grab me like that again.” He puts his hand to his cheek where there’s an evident red mark. “You hit me? You actually hit me.” “You grabbed me? All because I called Uma a bitch.” “Yeah and I’d do it again in a heartbeat if you were to say it again.” “Noted. I’m going to go now.” “Wait y/n,” he grabs my hand pulling me back, “I am sorry I missed our date.” “It’s fine Harry. I’ll see you later.” I walk away and out the double doors, as I do, I see a crowd of people standing there, clearly being nosey listening to me and Harry fight. “Scram you pieces of shit!” I growl and they all scatter running away.

Walking back to my dorm, i think about what happened with Harry, how he grabbed me and he said he’d do it again if I disrespected Uma, maybe he’s not who I thought he was.

Sighing I enter my room, and take my jacket off throwing it on my bed. “Oh my god! Y/n your neck.” Jane says, I turn to look at her, not realising, Evie and Carlos were sat with her.

“What?” “It’s all red! Like a huge red mark!”

I walk to the mirror and inspect my neck, she was right, there was a huge mark, it must of been where Harry grabbed my collar.

“What happened?”

“Oh erm, Harry grabbed me.”

“He what?!” All 3 say at the same time.

“Yeah, he grabbed me by the collar, but I shoved him away and hit him.” “Jesus y/n, you hit him?” I sit down on my bed opposite the three who were all sat on Jane’s bed.

“Erm yeah, I had no choice, I don’t think he would of let go otherwise.”

“Do we need to talk to him? Im sure Mal and Jay would be happy too.”

“No I’m fine honestly, I sorted it.”

“If you’re sure.” “I am. Thank you though.”

I stand up and walk over to my vanity, I keep lots of things in it but mostly alcohol. I pour myself a drink and down it. “Steady y/n.” Evie says, “I want to forget today ever happened so I’m not slowing down.” I repeat my actions, drink, pour, drink, pour and so on.

I get drunk, pretend that I'm over it

By 10pm I was laying in my bed, drunk and crying, “Why is my life like this Jane? Why couldn’t I have chosen a simple prince, why did I fall for the most complicated boy in Auradon?”

“I don’t know y/n. You know what they say, you can’t chose who your fall for.” “I understand that I do! But I just don’t get Harry, why can’t he just give me some of his time, it’s like he doesn’t even care about me but then he tells me he loves me? It’s so toxic.” “If you feel like that, you should end things with him. You can’t stay with someone you feel doesn’t care about you, even if they do say they love you.”

“But I can’t! There’s something about him that draws me too him, it’s like a connection. I’m hopeless without him but we’re evil together.”

They keep telling me to let go

But I don't really let go when I say so

“Sweetie, you need to sleep and talk to him tomorrow. You can’t make decisions while you’re drunk.” “I suppose not.” Just as I’m about to snuggle down into bed, there’s a knock at the door. “I’ll get it.” I get up and open the door, “Harry? What are you doing here?” “I needed to see you. To make sure you were okay.” He slurred his words and if I wasn’t so drunk I’d say he was drunker.

“Are you high?” I ask being able to smell it on him. “Maybe just a little.” “Oh for god sake, you need to go and sleep it off. We can talk tomorrow.” I push him out the room and walk him to his dorm, we’re like a pair of idiots, he’s leaning on me because he’s seeing double and I’m trying not to trip because the room is spinning.

I open his door to find Gil, Jay and Carlos, they all share a room. “Can one of you take him? He’s high.” I say shoving Harry off me and he falls on Gil’s bed. “Where are ya going?” “To bed.” I attempt to walk to the door but can’t locate it. “Are you drunk y/n?” I turn, not sure which one said it, “Yes, I’ve had a rough day. Don’t judge.” I narrow my eyes at the three of them.

“The doors on the left.” I nod and walk to the door, pushing it open, with a force before tripping over my own feet, making my way back to the dorm.

You get high and call on the regular

I pull my covers back and try to fall asleep, I know for a fact I’ll be hungover tomorrow and have to deal with Harry.

Waking up my hard was pounding, “Ugh.” Rolling over I sit up to Jane not in her bed, picking up my alarm clock, the small numbers reading 1:30pm. I’ve missed all my classes, I’m going to be in so much trouble.

“Oh morning sleepy head!” The door opens and Jane strolls in with a bag of food.

“You’ve missed your classes but I covered for you, said you were ill and when my mum checked on you, you were sleeping so I think you’re safe. I bought you water and a sandwich.”

“Oh thank you.” I stand up and quickly walk over to my wardrobe getting dressed into black jeans and a black top before brushing my teeth. As I sit down to eat, I ask Jane, “Have you er, have you seen Harry today?”

“I did, he was at practice. He didn’t seem himself.” She had a puzzled look on her face.

“Oh, I’m going to go and see him.” I stand up having finished my food and put my boots on.

“Okay, he should be in the gym, practice ran an hour late today so they don’t finish till 2.” I nod, leaving our room.

Mine and Harry’s relationship has always been rocky and by far no means perfect. We argue more than anything, we’re complete opposites, but we’ve been together for 3 years now.

Pushing open the gym door, I see the boys all stood in a circle talking. I stay back and wait sitting down on a bench. The boys break and all walk in different directions, Harry looks around the room spotting me and smiling slightly.

“Hey you.” He comes and sits with me, putting his arm around my shoulders.

“Where were you today?” “I slept through my alarm so didn’t bother with my lessons.” I shrug, “Fairy godmother was concerned about ya, so was I.” “I’m fine. Just overslept.” He pushes my hair out my face and a worrying look appears on his face, “Is that what I did yesterday?” He runs his fingers over the red mark on my neck, I flinch slightly, it clearly bruising. “Yeah.” I sigh, I look up at him for the first time and see a big purple bruise on his face, “Is that what I did yesterday?” Shocked I put both hands on his face and run my thumb over the bruise.

“It’s okay, I deserved it. I’m so sorry I did that to you.” His head drops and I lift his chin.

“Don’t be.” “I’m no good for you Y/n.” “Don’t you say that.” I sit even closer to him, “But it’s true Y/n. We fall out so much, I’m not good enough for you. You should be with someone who deserves you.” I shake my head profoundly, “That’s not true. If anything it’s the other way around Harry.” “I feel like we need space.” “What?” “I’m sorry but it’s over, we need time apart.” He gets up letting my hands go, before walking out the room. Shocked I sit there for ages, staring at the ceiling, my whole world falling apart around me. The silence was so loud it was deafening, it was like I was in another world, everything moving in slow motion.

Because I'm really not here when you're not there

I stand up and wipe the single tear that fell down my cheek away. I walk, slowly back to my room, when I open the door Jane was there, sat at her desk reading. “You okay?” I shake my head and sit on my bed pulling my knees to my chest. “What happened?” “We broke up.” I shut my eyes trying to not let the tears fall. “Oh Y/n I’m sorry.” Jane takes my silence as a queue to talk again, “Do you still want to go to the barbecue?” “Sure, I can’t hide forever I suppose.” I stand up and grab a grey jumper, slipping it over my black top.

“Let’s go.” She links our arms and I smile slightly at her efforts to cheer me up.

We walk out to the field and see everyone sat around a fire. “Hey Y/n.” Mal waves me and Jane over and we sit with her, I see Harry’s head rise at the mention of my name and he looks at me quickly before dropping his eyes again.

The evening flows and all I can do is stare into space and smile at people when they mention my name, I couldn’t even look at Harry without feeling emotionless.

I keep giving people blank stares

I'm so different when you're not there

Once the bonfire finishes, I stay and sit in front of the fire, even though the evening was cold, the air was warm from the flames. “Want some company?” I look up surprised, “Sure.” I shuffle over and make room for Harry. “What are you doing here? I thought you wanted space.” “I did, but I can see you’re shutting everyone out. You didn’t speak a single word at the bonfire.” “I didn’t feel like it.” “Love, you can’t ignore people.” “Why not? You do.” “That’s different.” “Oh really? So it’s different when you ignore me, when you ignore our plans?” “No it’s not but Y/n you know we’re not good for each other.” “We are for each other, we are so good for each other Harry.” “What makes you say that! We’re toxic, we argue, hell we even hit each other yesterday, we’re crazy.” Angry I stand up, “You’re wrong. We may be bad for each other but the good out-ways it. Hell when we’re good we’re amazing, I love you Harry, you know that.” “I love you too but I can’t deal with the stress, the control and the things you make me do.” “Fine then.” I walk away but he grabs me pulling me back. “I’m sorry love but it’s just how it has to be.” “Go to hell.” I yell at him before walking away and back to my room.

-(A month later) as I walk into the cafeteria, everyone stops talking and they all look at me, “What are you all looking at?” I shout, causing everyone to continue talking and eating, word must of spread about mine and Harry’s break up.

I sit at an empty table and eat my lunch.

“Y/n!” I look up to see Jane running towards me. “You’ve got to come with me now!” She drags me out my chair. “What? What’s going on?” She doesn’t answer me but continues run. “Jane stop!” I pull my arm back halting her in her tracks. “Tell me now!” “It’s Harry, he’s gone crazy, he’s challenged Chad to a fight, loser having to go to the Isle.” Following her out to the field, I see everyone gathered around Chad and Harry, I push through everyone until I’m stood in between them, “Have you gone mad?”I yell at Harry, he looks surprised to see me, I’m surprised to see him too, I haven’t seen him in a month. “Maybe.” “This stops now.” I say pushing Chad away and dragging Harry by the arm. “You’re insane. Loser has to go to the isle? Harry, Chad would of beat you easily.” “That’s the point.” We sit away from everyone on the bleachers. “You want to go back to the isle?”

“Yeah, I mean I’ve no purpose here now.” “What do you mean? Of course you do?” “Not without you Y/n. I’ve had this hell this last month. I’ve not been myself. I’ve hated it.”

I'm so different when you're not there

“Me too.” I look up at him and grab his hands, he stares at me with those blues eyes that could melt anyone’s heart and make them fall to their knee’s.

I get weak and fall like a teenager

“I’m really sorry, I thought I needed space but I really don’t.” I smile slightly and look up at him.

“You mean so much to me.” He places a hand on my face and kisses me softly. “I’ve missed you.” I pull him in for a hug and hold him tight.

“Don’t leave me again.” He squeezes me tightly and lets go, resting his forehead on mine, “I won’t. Even if we are no good.” I giggle, making him laugh too. I kiss him again and turn in my seat, leaning into his chest, he sighs and puts his arm around my shoulders. “I love you.” “I love you too.” I reply. Let’s see how long this good phase lasts before we fall out again.

I go back to you, back to you, back to you everytime.

-

Hope you liked it. Working on request now will be up tomorrow or Wednesday.

[writingkeepsmewhole]

Running

This is the second part of Betrayal my Dean Winchester AU Fic. You can find it here. Part 1 

This is long like the first part.  After Dean and Scarlet sleep with each other the deiced to pretend like it never happened. Them just going to stay friends and not tell Rebecca about there betrayal. 

Dean Winchester X OC Scarlet

Warnings: Cheating

I walked into my room my heart pounding loudly. I was back in my oversized T-shirt and panties. Even with that on I still felt like I was completely exposed. Like Rebecca could see what I just done.

"Hey sis." she says smiling up at me her on the floor her almost sitting in her own vomit.

"Come on." I say pulling her up to her feet and leading her into my on joining bathroom.

As soon as I turned on the light I couldn't help but look at myself to see if I looked different.

I was the same all for a flushed face. They talk about the afterglow I just looked flustered like someone who done something wrong. My face blotchy my skin sticky.

I didn't get to study myself for long or even think back on what I done.  Rebecca quickly puking again.  At least time it was in the toilet.

"I'm sorry." she mumbles standing up but almost falling.

"I know you are. I can't believe you are doing this to yourself."

'And to Dean. ' I thought but I tried not to think about him and what we just done it making it seem real if I did.

Starting the water I got her in the shower with much difficulty me getting just as wet.

I once again got her in dry clothes and back in bed her mumbling incoherent thoughts.

Sighing I took a deep breath not wanting to yell at her. I wanted to make sure she could understand what I was saying.

Trying to control myself I moved to my dresser and pulled out some warmer pjs.

I was halfway dressed when I soft knock filled the room.

I spun around quickly to find Dean shirtless leaning on the door frame.

"How is she?" he asks softly his eyes jumping between her and me.

To angry with my sister to noticed I quickly pull on my tank top.

"She is dealing with a hangover mixed with coming down she's lucky she's not dead." I say pulling out my laundry basket from the corner.

"Do you want me to take her to the hospital?"

"No, I want to wash these clothes and get some sleep. You can sleep in here with her." I say pushing past him and to the front door.

"You sure you want to go out there now? It's 4AM and a storm just came threw."

"Yes. I need time to think." I say flinching at how harsh I sounded but I was too mad to be nice.

Clenching his jaw Dean nodded. Going of that he seemed mad as well but when he softly brushed his lips across my forehead made me think differently.

“Be careful.” He says moving back into my bedroom.

When I got back from washing and drying my clothes Dean was asleep. Unlike what I requested he was passed out sideways in the chair.

Sighing I bite my lip but stop it being sore.

'That's what you get for sleeping with your sisters husband.'

Shaking my head I decided to check on Rebecca once before I went to bed.

Grabbing an extra blanket I laid it over Dean.

'Why did you have to be her husband?' I think moving to sit on the couch.

Curling up I try not to think about what I've done.  But every time I close my eyes I see and feel him touching me.

It's almost seven before I fall asleep. My last thought being how am I going to tell Rebecca.

I wake up to the smell of coffee. Its rich aroma filling my nose.  Rubbing my eye I open them to see my living room.

Tilting my head up to look in my on-joining kitchen I see two figures at my island.

Blinking the blurriness from my eyes I see that it's Dean and Rebecca.

Remembering last night and knowing it wasn't just a messed up dreams I groan. My arm covering my face.

"Sis you awake?" Rebecca says sounding horse most likely from puking.

"Sadly yes." I mumble sitting up my body aching from sleeping on the couch.

Moving the blanket off me I wonder who put it there my mind going to Dean since its the same one I gave him.

"What time is it?" I ask shuffling towards them.

I can feel Dean trying to catch my eyes with his but I ignore it.

I was too tired and aggravated to deal with lasts nights activities.

"It's about 10:30." he says

"When do you have to work?" Rebecca asks handing me a cup of coffee.

She looked as bad as I felt but she was trying to get on my good side.

"4 thank God." I say fixing the coffee how I liked it.

"Oh good. You had a late night huh?"

"Why would think that?" I ask not hiding the sharpness of my tone.

"Sorry we can talk about that later...." She says Dean still trying to get my attention.

"And what else are we going to talk about?" I ask wanting to glare at her but she wasn't the only guilty one last night.

"Umm like the guy you are seeing?"

"What?" both me and Dean say at the same time, me almost spilling coffee everywhere.

"Well you had a guy over last night right?"

"No why?" I ask my voice shaking a bit.

"You are covered in hickies." she says making all the blood drain from my face.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Dean smirk into his coffee.

"You need to leave. Both of you." I say turning toward my room.

"Wait Scarlet is this about last night? It wasn't my fault." Rebecca says grabbing my arm.

Glancing down at her I see the pen prickles of needle marks on her inner arm.

Clenching my jaw I jerk away from her.

"To be honest yeah it kinda is."

"Im sorry I can't help it. It's a disease." she says her eyes full of unshed tears.

" A disease? You think shooting up and popping pills is a disease? Cancer is a disease. It's something you can't control. You choose to shoot up or snort something or drink yourself to death. Mom had a disease. You, your pathetic. Now get out of my house." I say calmly walking into my room and shutting the door.

I didn't bother listening if they left. Setting an alarm on my phone I lied face first on my bed and quickly fell into a much needed dreamless sleep.

I woke up to ringing. Feeling around for my phone I answered it without looking at the caller.

"Hello?" I asked my eyes still closed.

"About time you wake up." says a clear voice.

"Who is this?"

"it's Ruby don't you have my number? Hey are you sleeping?" shs asks

"Trying to. I keep getting woken up."

"Well the boss is pissed at you for being an hour late."

"What?" I ask jumping up and looking at the clock on the wall.

It showing 5:10 on it.

"Oh my gosh I'm so screwed. Tell Richard I'll be there in 15 minutes and that he can take it out of my check just keep me from getting fired." I say the whole time getting dressed.

"I'll try but he is not in a good mood the wife came back in town."

"Just great. I'll be there soon promise." I say hanging up the phone.

Grabbing my keys and sprinted out the door.

Locking it I almost didn't noticed the black impala parked on a few feet away.

"What are you doing here?" I asked Dean leaning on the hood.

"Giving you a ride. Ruby called Sam. Sam called me."

"Why the hell are you not at work?"

"I'm my own boss remember."

"Well most of us don't have that luxury I'm already late."

"Did you not here the part about me giving you a ride."

"I'm not getting a ride from you." I say remembering the last time we were left alone.

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because last night?"

"We are not talking about that."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to." I snap at him.

Running his hand down his face he nods.

"Alright well get in the car and I promise we won't talk."

"Fine." I say getting in the impala it's leather seats cool to the touch.

"How long have you been out here?"

"About half an hour." he says backing up.

"Why didn't you come in?"

"Because I was talking to your sister." he says pulling into the street.

"Oh." I say ignoring the tightens in my stomach like I was the one that got cheated on.

"How is she?"

"You should ask her yourself. All I got was mumbled gibberish."

"Of course I have to work today." I say laying my head on the window glad it was cold.

"Don't you work everyday?"

"Sadly yes.... "

"You should take some time off."

"How would I pay my bills?"

"I could give you some money."

"Absolutely not."

"It's the least I could do after last night." He says looking at me.

"Excuse me?" I asked shocked he is even suggesting that.

"Scarlet it's not that big a deal." he says pulling up to a red light.

"You know what I'd rather walk thanks. " I say quickly getting out of the car.

Slamming the door I quickly walk to work not realizing I forgot my keys and phone until I get there.

Walking into work I quickly was met by Ruby.

"Hey you made it." shs says smiling.

"Yeah I made it."

"Hey you okay?"

"I'm fine just did something really dumb last night."

"One night stand?" she asks

"Oh I hope so. " I say putting my coat on the rack. I know deep down I would want Dean again that’s why I was going to make sure I stayed away from him.

Going behind the counter to clock in I can't help but feel like everyone is watching me judging me for what I did.

Do you look different after you sleep with your sisters husband and then kick her out?

I didn't get time to answer that before Richard walks up to me and ask to see me in his office.

I sit in the chair across from him my leg bouncing.

"I saw that you were late today quite a bit late."

"Sir I know I'm so sorry. I just had a lot going on with my sister last night and-"

"Your sister is that so?  Because it looks to me you just got done from rolling around in the bed with someone." he says shocking me since he never talks this way.

"Excuse me? " I ask for the second time today.

"Me and my wife have been talking and if you can't pull your weight I'm gonna have to let you go."

"Sir not to  disrespect but I haven't missed work in over a year."

"That maybe so but you don't do your job when you are here."

"Sir I don't know where this is coming from and I will be happy to improve but-"

"But I think you are going to have to prove to me you are worth keeping around."

"Of course sir whatever you need."

"Lock the door then come here." he says calmly.

"What?"

"Lock the door and come here." he says slowly like I'm stupid.

"Sir I'm not sure what this has to do with my job."

"It has to do everything with it. I'm your boss and if you can't follow orders then there is no longer a place for you here. " he says looking me dead in the eye.

Then I guess you made your decision." I say standing up.

"I guess so. I'll send you your check."

Leaving his office I don't even respond to Ruby asking me if I'm Okay.

Grabbing my coat I head back home my mind numb but racing at the same.  I wondering if I'm being punished for sleeping with Dean.

When I get home I quickly realized I'm without a phone and keys.

Great I think sliding down my door.

Laying my head on my knees I let my mind drift.

It filling with the thoughts of Dean.

Shaking my head I sit up just in time to hear the familiar rumble of the impala. It shortly coming into view.

I let myself watch Dean climb out of the car.

"What happened to work?" he asks walking up to me.

"I needed time to think." I lie standing up.

"Oh well here." he says handing me my phone and keys

"Thanks" I say opening the door aware of him following me.

"You still pissed at me?" he asks surprising me.

"Probably." I say throwing my keys and phone on the island.

"Are we going to talk about last night? "

"I don't want to talk about that."

"Well we are going to have to."

"I know." I say sighing standing in the middle of the living room my back to him.

"Scar you gotta talk. " he says touching my arm.

"Not today."

"When? "

"I don't know..."

"Scar.”

"No Dean don't okay. " I say pulling away from him.  Away from the tingles and the warm feeling in my stomach from my skin making contact with his.  Away from the edge. Away from the want to wrap myself around him and forget about everything.

My job, my house, my loyalty to my sister.

"What happened today? Don't tell me you needed to think you think better at work then home."

"I lost my job, okay?" I yell turning around to face him.

"I lost my job because I wouldn't sleep with my boss. I'm going to lose my house and probably lose my sister as well."

"Why would you do that?" He asks taking a step closer to me but not touching me.

"Because I slept with her husband."

"Your not the only one who is guilty. She won't blame you."

"Yeah that's what you think. She knows I've liked you since I met you she is not going to think it was an accident."

"It wasn't an accident. I wasn't lying last night."

"Dean don't. You don't have to act like you love me or something. You- We were both stressed out last night. We had sex with my sister in the next room. We are not going to live happily ever after. From my day today I think I'll get the opposite." I say wrapping my arms around myself.

"You don't believe in that stuff do you? We messed up. I messed up I should have said no or left or something."

"Why didn't you?" I ask looking up at him his heavy green eyes meeting mine.

"Because I didn't want to." he says clenching his jaw.

Feeling my heart pound against my ribs. I look away from him knowing if I didn't I would give in.

Dean was my weakness.

Seeing him move closer I feel him grab my elbow. His thumb softly rubbing my arm.

"I'm going to tell her. I won't tell her it was you. I'm sorry sweetheart." He says softly brushing his lips over my cheek.

Closing my eyes I try to remember the way he smells scared this is the last time I'll see him.

My heart racing at the thought. Fear filling my chest.

"Dont." I say looking up at him.

"Don't tell her. We'll just never talk about it. Act like it didn't happen. Don't tell her please." I say grabbing his arm.

"Why? "

"Because if you tell her she'll make you leave and if you do I'll never see you again and I can't… I can’t live with that." I say my eyes burning from unshed tears.

Smiling softly he nods.

"Alright. It never happened."

"It never happened." I say nodding taking a step away from him.

Before either one of us could say anything else Dean's phone rings.

"It's Sam. I'll be right back." he says stepping outside.

When he does I take a much needed breath. My heart feeling like it was going to explode. Running my fingers through my hair I move into my room and start taking off my uniform.

Hearing a knock I roll my eyes surprised Dean locked himself out.

'Okay just breathe Scarlett. It's just Dean nothing happened you are just friends nothing more.' I think to myself opening the door.

I take a step back when I meet Richards dark eyes.

"What are you doing here?" I ask

"We need to talk." he says pushing past me and into my living room.

"About what?"

"About how rudely you treated me this afternoon. I was trying to help you and you threw it back at me"

"Okay you asked me to sleep with you to keep my job and I said no.  So get out of my house."

"Or what you'll get the idiot outside to beat me up."

"Don't be ridiculous I can take care of myself."

"Well then do the right thing." he says pulling me closer by my arm.

"I am." I say clenching my jaw.

"I'm trying to help you."

"No you are trying to help yourself. I don't know what kind of game your playing but I'm not some whore you can buy." I say jerking away from him.

Grabbing me roughly he jerks me towards him glaring at me.

"Your going to regret this."

I didn't get a chance to respond before he slammed his mouth into mine. Trying to push him away he holds onto me tightly his fingernails digging into my arms. I push at his chest and bite his lip. Pulling my head back I scream hoping Dean didn't leave. Smacking me he yanks me back and shakes me.

"Shut up!" he yells at me.

I try to get away from him hot tears staining my face. I jump when he is jerked off me. Hearing shattered glass I see my lamp fly to crash into the floor.

Blinking I take a step back realizing Dean is standing over my boss hitting him repeatedly.

It taking a moment for me to do anything.

"Dean stop." I say running up to grab his arm.

"Not until he apologizes." he growls out jerking Richard back to his feet.

"Tell her your sorry."

When he didn't get a response he slams his fist into his jaw.

"Dean, don't. He's not worth you getting in trouble."I say grabbing his bicep.

"If you ever show up here again. I'll kill you." he says letting him go Richard barley getting out if the apartment before Dean slams the door. Locking it he turns to face me pulling me into his chest.

As soon as he does the smell of him wraps around me. Leather, oil and whisky fills my nose. I can’t help but burry my face into him. Taking a shaky breath I grab his shirt so hard my fingertips turn white.

"I'm sorry." he says just holding onto me.

"For what?" I choke out no longer crying just jittery.

"For scaring you."

"You didn't scare me. You saved me."

"So your not mad at me for beating the crap out of him?"

Laughing softly I shaking my head sniffling.

"No, I'm not mad at you." I say pulling away from him.

Wiping my face with the back of my hand I smile at him.

Returning my smile he brushes my cheek with his thumb.

"You alright?"

I nod tucking my hair behind my ear. Taking a breath I smile softly.

"A little shaky but I'm okay. Thank you."

"You want me to stay here?"

"That's probably not a good idea."

"Yeah probably not but who said anything about the good idea?" he asks grinding.

"I actually don't even want to be here right now. "

"You can come to the shop. I'm sure Bobby would be happy to see you."

"Are you sure?"

"Sure enough." he says smiling.

"Okay." I say pulling away from him us still pretty close to touching.

I grab my bag throwing my keys and phone into it.

I try not to think about Dean pushing my shattered lamp out of the way.

Getting into the impala I take a deep breath feeling like the air is clearer here.

"You want something to eat?" he asks pulling out into the street.

I started to say no but I quickly remembered I haven't ate anything since dinner last night.

"Sure." I say shrugging.

Driving in silence for a while he pulls to my favorite fast food place and surprises me by ordering exactly what I like.

"How did you know all that?" I ask while we pull up to the window.

"Because you like the same healthy stuff Sam likes."

"I don't think pasta is healthy."

"Better than pie maybe." I say laughing as he looks at me from the corner of his eye.

"Leave my pie out of this." he says handing me my food.

"You are not going to eat."

"I got food while bringing your keys back."

"Oh. Thank you for that by the way."

"Don't thank me I'm glad I was there to stop that asshole from touching you."

"Right." I say picking at my food thinking about what could have happened if Dean wasn't there.

I slowly eat trying to figure out what made him do it in the first place.

"Son of a bitch!" Dean yells slamming on the brakes as a bike pulls in front of him.

"Are you okay?" he asks looking at me.

"I'm okay." I say picking the food off my shirt.

"Nothing soap can't fix." I say looking up at him.

My eyes catching the site of red on his knuckles.

"Oh my gosh Dean!" I say pulling his hand to me.

"What?" he asks looking at me then the road.

"Look at your hand" I say looking at the busted knuckles.

"Darlin' relax it's fine."

"No it's not you got hurt." I say softly touching around the broken skin.

Moving his hand he softly pats my leg and returns it to the wheel.

"Dont worry about it." he says silence falling around us.

It stays that way the only sound is our breathing and me taking a bite of food.  

I can't help but feel bad. Like I done something wrong.

Well of course I done something wrong I slept with my sisters husband and then told him to act like it didn't happen.

Most men would he happy for that but I can't help but feel like Dean was angry with me.

When we got to the car repair shop Dean quickly got out and slammed the door making me jump.

I watched him walk into the office but stayed where I was.

'He really was mad at me I guess' I think slowly getting out of the car.

I shut the door and take a deep breath of fresh air to clear my mind.

It working for a total of two seconds.

My mind going back to everything that happened today and last night.

Last night a mistake but I would be lying if I said I didn't want it.

It wasn't even the sex it was just getting close to someone. Getting close to someone like Dean would have made me happy but getting that close to someone you love is different.

'Oh gosh I'm in love with Dean Winchester.' I think laying my forhead on the black roof of the car.

"Well look what the cat dragged in." says a familiar voice.

Looking up I meet Bobby's kind eyes.

"Hey Bobby." I say accepting his hug.

Bobby was always one of my regulars at the dinner but after Rebecca and Dean got together it felt like he was more family then I had in awhile.

"Someone looks like they could use a drink." he says holding me at arm's length and looking me over.

My arms stung a bit from earlier but I didn't say anything.

"How about two?" I ask laughing.

"Have a rough day?" he asks taking me around back to his house.

The place used to be Bobby's but he sold it to Dean and just leaves as a shut in. Or as he says a paranoid bastard

"You could say that. " I say walking into his house.

Books and clutter everywhere. His wife died a few years back making the house lacking in presentableness but it felt homie somehow.

"Dean told me about what happened." he says handing me a beer.

"What?" I ask almost choking.

"Your sister started using again." he says making me remember he gave me advice on how to get her clean last time.

"Oh right. Yeah I don't know what I'm gonna do." I say leaning on the counter.

"Ain't nothing you can do. Beat some sense into her maybe but she is gonna do whatever she wants."

"Yeah I know.  But she's the only family I got. Without her I'm left alone with nothing." I say taking another drink.

"Well how do you plan on fixing it?"

"Lock her up and detox her I guess." I say laying my head on the fridge.

"What's Dean have to say about this?"

"Me and Dean are kinda not talking at the moment."

"Why the hell is that?" he said asking the one question I didn't want to answer.

"I don't know." I say honestly not really knowing why he was mad at me. Though I had an idea.

"Now don't go acting like a couple of babies fighting. Becca is gonna need the both of you together if you want to save her. Speck of which where is she anyway?"

"I don't know."

"Hell don't you know anything?"

"I thought I did but I'm starting to think I don't know anything."

"Damn it Scarlet stop speaking in damn riddles and tell me what's going on." he says looking like he is about to start yelling.

Sighing I bite my lip knowing I'm going to have to tell someone.

"You can't tell Rebecca or Sam or even Dean I told you." I say

"I ain't into keeping secrets from my boys."

"Trust me it won't be hard to keep."

"Well what the hell is then?"

"I slept with Dean last night." I say slowly.

"Well it's about time you two get your head out of your ass and finely do something about each other."

"Wait your not mad?"

"Why the hell would I be mad? I knew you two would end up together. I don't know why he decided on your sister in the first place. I told him he was making a mistake. But he is stubborn just like John can't tell him anything." he says walking into his living room.

"Wait if you knew that then why not tell me?"

"Because he was marrying your sister I'm a drunk not an idjit." he say looking at me like I'm stupid.

"So what do you plan on doing?"

"I don't plan on doing anything. I had sex with my sisters husband. It's not like I can tell her or anyone else. Me and Dean agreed to pretend it never happened."

"If you think that's gonna work your a bigger idiot than I thought."

"It has to work. I have to get Rebecca clean."

"Say you do that then what? "he asks leaning back in his chair.

"What do you mean?  Then nothing."

"You really think what you two did will just disappear?"

"It has to."

Squinting at me closes his eyes.

"You let me know how that goes." he says pointing at me with his beer.

Sighing I get up knowing Bobby has spoken his mind no use trying to change it.

Walking outside in the sea of cars I jump when I hear a loud bang.

Ignoring my instincts I follow the sound breaking glass filling my ears followed by another bang and something snapping.

Walking around a pile of cars I see someone beating up an old truck with a tire iron. I quickly realized its Dean.

I hide behind the cars wondering why he is doing that.  He keeps hitting it denting it up. His muscles straining and his face red.

"Son of a bitch!" he screams loudly making me jump.

Throwing his weapon of choice down he stands there panting heavily.

Deciseding it's safe not wanting to leave him like this I slowly move closer to him.

"Dean." I say softly scared he'll lunged at a loud noise.

"Are you okay?" I ask when he doesn't respond.

"I'm fine." he says not moving.

"Is this about last night or something?"

"I don't want to talk Scar." he says his voice making me jump though it wasn't loud.

"Okay we won't talk. " I say taking the last few steps to be behind him.

"I don't think you should be alone." I ask my voice shaking.

With my heart racing I move around him and sit in the truck the doors missing. I look at the other cars, or the ground or sky but never at Dean. I knew he needed space but I also knew he didn’t need to be left by himself. God knows what he would do if he was left alone with his thoughts and anger.

“Your scared of me.” He says running his hand down his face.

“Why would you think that?” I ask my voice sounding as shocked as I felt.

“Your shaking.” He says walking up to me.

I jump when he grabs my hand off my lap but it was surprise more than fear.

“Look.” He says dropping my arm.

Holding it in the air myself I watch my hand shake slightly.

“Sorry.” I say crossing my arms over my chest.

“Don’t apologize.” He says clenching his jaw and grabbing his jacket.

In a matter of seconds I go from trying to keep him from feeling alone to being left behind.

I watch him disappear in the sea of cars half wondering how I’m going to find my way back to Bobby’s or the shop. The other half wondering what I did to make him so angry at me.

I sat in the truck for at least an hour. Thinking about everything that happened and everything that happened today. I felt like I was being punished. The only thing I could think of was what I did with Dean. I betrayed my sister. Not even that I did it while she was recovering from an almost overdose in the next room.

But I wasn’t the only guilty one. Dean told me he didn’t want to stop. So did that mean he had feelings for me? Or was he just in a low place and needed his own kind of fix?

When I heard footsteps I looked up to see a mess of brown hair.

"There you are." Sam says smiling at me.

"Here I am... "I say sighing.

"You alright?" He asks climbing into the truck with me.

"Define okay?"

"Okay like I can fix whatever is bothering you."

"Then I don't know if I'm okay." I say honestly.

"Dose it have something to do with why Dean peeled out of here like a bat out of hell?"

"That's part of it."

"What's the other part?"

"Rebecca is using again. Going off last night she is using whatever is cheap."

"Oh Scarlet I'm sorry." he says touching my shoulder.

"Don't be. I don't even know how I feel about it yet."

"You wanna talk about it?"

"What's there to talk about? My sister is on drugs, I lost my job and your brother is pissed at me."

"Well maybe I can help with one of those."

"Oh yeah what's that?"

"Find out why Dean is mad."

"I know why and before you ask it's okay I'll figure it out."

"Well what can I do? "

"Take me home?"

"Of course." he says smiling.

[apologieslogan]

Overwhelming- Chapter 4

HELLO YES IM SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG :((((((( I'm not extremely proud of this but I'm happy that I finished it!! woooo!!!!

Warnings: crying, mild panic, fluff, tell me if I missed!!1

pairing: LAMP

Words: 2938

Last Chapter

The first thing Logan noticed when he woke up was that Patton was wrapped around him as tight as physically possible. Logan had no qualms about that. Patton was still asleep, so Logan allowed himself to just enjoy admiring his boyfriend’s face. He trailed his hands across Patton’s cheekbones, moving to trace against his jaw. Logan felt so much love for the man in front of him. The man who lets him put his guard down and be himself without fear of judgement. The man who saw Logan at his very worst and not only chose to stay, but felt guilt for not helping sooner. Logan leaned in to gently press his lips against Patton’s, love surging in his chest and making it hard to breathe. He clung to Patton the way Patton clung to him. As he lay there, overcome with emotions, he felt his boyfriend start to rouse.

Patton woke up to a very cuddly, affectionate Logan. He looked down to see his boyfriend clinging onto him for dear life. Patton tightened his grip on Logan, feeling indescribable love for the man in his arms.

“What a wonderful way to wake up.” Patton says, voice still gravely with sleep.

“I agree.” Logan says, a faint blush coloring his cheeks.

“You ready to face the day?” Patton asks, stretching his arms over his head as Logan twists around to crack his spine, a nasty habit that Patton wishes he would quit.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.” Logan says, a determined look on his face. They both can hear the underlying fear in his words.

--

the two were cuddled up on the couch, not doing anything in particular, just basking in the feeling of each other’s presence. The day had gone by smoothly, both of them being soft and sweet with each other, erasing last night out of their heads. Patton had made no comments about the scratches on Logan’s face, but he had noticed that they were a lot more visible today, turning from light pink after they were freshly cleaned to an irritated red. Neither of them wanted to talk about how they were going to explain the scratches to the other two when they got home, for fear that it would set one, or both, of them off.

It was about thirty minutes later that Roman and Virgil came bursting through the door.

“Greetings, beloved!” Roman shouted at the room. Virgil gave a small wave.

“Hey there, sweethearts!” Patton said, waving at the two. Logan stayed quiet.

Roman and Virgil went to join the other two on the couch.

“I can’t wait to tell you all about our outing! It was so romantic. I think it’s safe to say that I outdid myself, once again.” Roman boasted, squeezing Virgil’s hands in his. “But first, I require a welcome home kiss from each of my beautiful boyfriends.” Roman finished, crouching in front of Patton.

Roman took Patton’s face in his hands as he looked deep into his eyes. he leaned forward and gave Patton a beautiful fairy tale kiss. He turned to give Logan the same treatment but stopped when he saw Logan crouched in on himself, refusing to meet Roman or Virgil head-on.

“Logan? Everything okay, dear?” Roman asked.

Logan nodded. He couldn’t let them see his face like this. He knew he looked like a mess and he really didn’t want to deal with what was to come, but he knew he had to. He slowly looked up, eyes focusing on Virgil first, who immediately saw the scratches and let out a small gasp. Logan winced at his reaction and turned to Roman. Roman’s eyes widened as he took in the sight before him. There were multiple scratches on both of Logan’s cheeks, angry red and glaring at him. Roman felt his pulse jump. Whatever it was that did this to his harmless boyfriend would have to pay the price.

Logan took Roman’s silence as disgust and covered his face with his hands, leaving a small gap for him to look out of.

“Oh, dearheart, no. Don’t cover up. What happened to you? What beast attacked you in this way?” Roman pleaded, desperate to get justice for Logan.

Beast. Roman called him a beast. Logan knew he never would have said that if he knew that these were self-inflicted scratches, but the word still hurt. To Logan’s surprise, he felt tears collecting in his eyes, filling too quickly for him to catch up.

Virgil was the first one to notice the tear fall down Logan’s face, and he sprang into action, wiping the tear away as quickly as it formed, but as another tear fell down his face, and another and another, Virgil knew this was something they were going to have to ride out.

Roman went from confused to alarmed as soon as he saw the tears stream down Logan’s face. He looked to Patton to ask what he should do, but the look in Patton’s eyes was pure heartbreak and protection. Patton knew something he didn’t.

“Patton?” Roman started, shifting from foot to foot. “What happened?”

“Well…” Patton began, looking to Logan for permission to tell the story of what had happened the previous night. Upon seeing Logan nod, he proceeded to tell the tale. “You guys might want to sit down for this one. It’s kind of a long story…”

--

By the time Patton was done telling they tale behind Logan’s scratches, tears were streaming down his face, as well as Roman’s and Virgil’s. The entire time Patton was recounting the story, Logan was curled up into a ball, refusing to look at anyone else. He kept on thinking about how he felt the whole time during his episode, and how helpless Patton looked once he came back to his senses. Logan noticed he was shaking more than he had been the since he woke up that morning, and a considerable amount of fear coursed through him, terrified that he was going to fall into another episode.

The three turned their attention to Logan, and the sight broke their hearts. Logan was curled up into a ball, shaking so hard that they feared he would fall apart. Virgil was the first to react.

“Oh, Logan. Are you okay? Can I touch you?” He asked, making sure to keep his voice soft.

Silence.

“Logan? Logan? Can you hear us?” Patton said, trying to suppress the worry in his voice.

Nothing. Logan continues to sit and shake, small whimpers coming out of his mouth.

“Oh, God. Please not again.” Patton mumbles under his breath.

Roman stares at Logan in horror. His poor boyfriend trapped in his own mind like that pulled on his heartstrings. Roman knows he should ask before touching Logan but the need to protect was far greater in his eyes. He puts a single hand between Logan’s shoulder blades.

Logan lets out a panicked yelp, sitting up as straight as possible. Roman quickly takes his hand away, guilt flooding his being at scaring Logan so badly. He moves to apologize for startling Logan but the look in his eyes stops him.

Logan looks terrified. His eyes are darting back and forth across the room, as if waiting for something to attack him. He can feel the fear begin to take over again, and he chokes out a sob.

“Logan!” Patton cries, “Please, baby, if you can hear us lift your finger or nod your head, something. Please.”

The others hold their breath as they wait for Logan to respond.

“I can- I can hear you.” Logan whimpers, trying his best to calm down before it’s too late.

“What do you need us to do?” Virgil asks, hand hovering over Logan’s arms, wanting to wrap him in a hug, but knowing that it’s a bad idea.

“Help. Help me. It’s going to happen again.” Logan chokes out. “I- I don’t- I don’t want that to happen again. Please! Someone help me.”

The other three sides can feel their hearts breaking at the pleading tone in Logan’s voice. Patton is the first to break, silent tears dripping down his face at seeing his boyfriend look so helpless. Roman can feel tears well up in his eyes, but he needs to stay strong and help Logan out of this. Virgil is watching on in horror, terrified for Logan.

“Logan, I’m going to touch you now, okay?” Roman says cautiously, slowly closing in on Logan. Logan doesn’t reply.

Roman wraps his arms around Logan, running his hand up and down his back. Logan cries out, jolting in his grip and begins to shake harder, but the longer he remains in Roman’s arms, the calmer he feels. After he stops struggling, he feels his body go lax, tucking his face into Roman’s neck. He looks like he’s trying to get as close as possible to the prince. He goes completely silent.

“Logan? You still with us, buddy?” Virgil asks, running his hands through his hair.

Roman felt Logan nod into his neck.

“Sweetheart, we don’t want to push, but I think we need to have a discussion about this.” Patton said, squeezing Logan’s hands in his.

Logan nodded, finally sitting up straight. Nobody said anything about his bloodshot eyes or his still trembling hands.

“I would like to apologize for my emotional outburst just now.” Logan starts, a weak tremor in his voice. “I find myself to be more… emotional, for a few days after these episodes. I will try to keep it under control.”

“You will do no such thing!” Virgil objects. “How many times have you guys had to take extra precaution around me after a bad episode? Why would we not do the same for you?”

“Virgil’s right, dear.” Roman added, moving to sit with his legs folded underneath him. “If the issue is that you feel as if you are burdening us, you must know that is not the case. We want to make sure you’re okay, so that these episodes don’t become a common occurrence.”

Logan nodded, preparing himself for a long-winded conversation.

“I find myself unsure of where to begin this discussion, so if any of you have any questions, I’ll do my best to answer them.”

“How many times has this happened?” Virgil asked, preparing himself for an answer he didn’t want to hear.

“This will be the second time.” Logan answered, looking on in slight amusement as Roman and Virgil breathed a sigh of relief.

“Thank God. If this had been going on for a countless amount of times, I don’t think I’d be able to forgive myself for letting you suffer in silence.” Roman said, slouching into the couch.

“Even if it had been, it wouldn’t be your fault. I made a mistake by not telling you three that I was prone to these episodes.”

“Logan, I don’t think you should be blaming yourself over this either. There really isn’t anyone to blame here. I’m sorry that it took you reaching your breaking point for us to find out, but that doesn’t make it any more your fault, babe.” Patton said, looking eagerly at Logan.

Logan flushed to his ears, noticing that that all sides were looking at him.

“Yes, I suppose.” Logan said, fixing his tie. “The only thing to do is put it past us.”

“Wait. Question number two over here! Whydo these happen?” Roman asked.

Logan flushed even more, feeling heat at the back of his neck. Was he ready to tell the other two about his insecurities? He just told Patton and he was emotionally compromised when he did so! What if the other two looked at him differently? What if they no longer took him seriously? What if-

“Logan! You okay?” Roman asked, a worried look on his face. “We lost you there for a second.”

“Yes. Well- in regard to the reason why these episodes happen- they are very similar to Virgil’s anxiety attacks. During great times of stress, I begin to think many… illogical things that do nothing but send me off the metaphorical deep end.”

“Think illogical things like what?” Virgil asked, though he already knew the answer.

Everyone waited in nervous silence as they allowed Logan to muster up the courage to tell them.

“I have certain… insecurities.” Logan said, unwilling to delve deeper, though he knew he had to.

Everyone just stared, waiting for him to elaborate.

Logan let out a shaky breath, scratching lightly at his wrists. Roman quickly snared his hands in one of his.

“Absolutely not. I get that you’re nervous to open up to us, dear, but I will not have you scratching yourself any longer.” Roman said, a look of pain in his eyes as he rubbed his thumbs over Logan’s pink wrists.

Logan looked around him, at his three wonderful boyfriends who were so willing to be there for him, and he felt awful.

“I don’t deserve you three.” Logan said, looking down. “You are all so amazing, and loving, and kind, and I truly cannot comprehend why you would want to be romantically involved with me.” He admitted, tensing up as he waited for a response. As he heard nothing, he continued to speak, all his thoughts flowing out of his mouth.

“All I want to do is make you all proud. I work so hard and so frequently because I thought that maybe one day I would feel like I’ve done enough to deserve your love.” He said, taking in a shaky breath. “But it is never enough- I never do enough. I realize that no amount of work I do is going to make me feel like I deserve to be with you, and the feelings of inadequacy are becoming unbearable.” He finishes, chancing a look at all of them. What he sees shocks him into stillness.

All three of his boyfriends, his wonderful, caring boyfriends are in tears at Logan’s words. Patton has his hand covering his mouth, small whimpers spilling out as tears run over his hand.

Virgil is looking at his lap, twisting his hands together, shaking. He never wanted Logan to think the same things he thought, and it broke his heart.

And Roman. Roman was sat on the floor directly in front of Logan, his head in his knees. There were no tears, yet. He was overwhelmed. He felt angry, and sad, and confused, and guilty. God, did he feel guilty. His fragile, beautiful Logan thought so little of himself and it broke his heart. He needed to fix this.

“Logan. I know this isn’t an issue you fix overnight, but you have to listen to me and take my words seriously.” Roman started, determination in his eyes. “Weadoreyou. You are smart, and complex, and caring in your own unique ways. You don’t need to prove yourself to us, we already love you. We always will.”

Logan was at war with himself. He knew all of the sides were unlikely to lie to him, but he also knew they were likely to say nice things just to placate him. He didn’t know what to believe.

The others must have seen the confusion on his face, because suddenly he was surrounded in warm touches. Patton was rubbing his back while Virgil was running hand through his hair. Roman was holding his hands, kissing his knuckles delicately. Logan felt a powerful surge of love run through him.

“I love you. I love you all so much. I’m so sorry for-”

“No need for apologies, Logan. We understand.” Virgil said, a sad smile on his face.

It all clicked for Logan. He wasn’t the only one with insecurities. He wasn’t the only one with doubts. All three of his boyfriends had felt less than at one point or another.

Logan was at a loss for words. How could he let such things eat him up when he knows that his boyfriends are all willing to sit with him and help him work through his problems, like he has for them? Like Virgil said, they understand.

“Logan? You on Earth?” Roman asked, the silence coming from Logan unsettling him.

Logan locked eyes with Roman and gave a small smile. “Yes. I’ve just come to realization that my hiding things from you was a bit unnecessary and stupid.”

The other three started to protest, but Logan cut them off.

“I mean, why would I have to hide things from you when I know that you won’t view me any differently? I just… assumed you all would.”

“You jumped to a conclusion.” Virgil said, a smile on his face.

Logan mirrored his smile, nodding gently. “That, I did, Virgil.”

The four lapsed into a content silence, basking in each other’s presence.

“You know what would make this even better, you guys?” Patton asked, an excited glint in his eyes.

“A cuddle-fest!” Roman and Patton shouted together, making the other two laugh at their antics.

Roman snapped everyone into their favorite pajamas while Patton went to the kitchen to put together a snack tray.

As everyone settled in for the night, Logan looked around. All of his boyfriends curled around each other did wonders to his heart, and he found himself smiling at them.

“What’s on your mind, teach?” Patton asked, running a hand through Logan’s hair.

“Nothing. I just love you all.”

As a chorus of ‘we love you too’ rang back out at him, Logan felt himself relax for the first time in days. How could he not? He was surrounded by his loving boyfriends, and that was all he needed.

TAG LIST:

All:

@galaxy-warping

@katatles-the-fish

@iridescentroyalty

Overwhelmed:

@fantazyiskey

@sylveon-lover-crazyfangirl1415

@sanderstalker

@chipminkle

@icantbeme71097

@under-the-blue-moonlight

@ilylogan

@ross-banner

@penumbra-the-unicorn

@deceit-sandersside

@crofters-junkie

@ineedfriendsbclife

@purplesoul-at-hogwarts

@virgil-my-diamond

@storytellerofuntoldlegends

@bunny222

@sander-fander-sides

MY TAG LIST IS BEING A HARDASS IM SORRY IF I MISSED YOU

[the-goddess-of-change]

Requested. The sound of thunder roars across the skies as i look out onto the pouring rain drinking my cup of coffee and thank myself i'm not out there I look up at the blue skies to see the skies light up as yet another lightning rides across the sky as the thunder roars It is already late at night and the storm shows no sign of stopping i walk back to my chair and sit down as i take a sip of the coffee and put it down on the table next to me The sound of thunder...the flash of lightning and the pouring rain, it makes it all feel quite...calming the rain is hitting my windows but i just feel at ease as i close my eyes and listen to it ...... ....... i wake up to the sound of two cars honking as i see its sunny outside i guess i must have fallen asleep i think to myself as i notice the cup of coffee is still next to me i stand up and pour out the coffee in the sink as i stretch my arms and start brewing another batch of coffee I yawn as i do as i spot the mail from my kitchen window i look at the coffee brewer which is still well bellow the middle as i step outside and pick up the mail as my feet hit something i look down as i spot a small ring i lean down and pick it up as i look at it some more it has a sorta dirty look to it, like its been lying under dirt for ages i put it in my pocket and walk back inside and turn of the coffee machine and pour myself a cup of coffee i take the ring out of my pocket and put it under the sink and start cleaning it i keep cleaning it but it still has a bit of a dirty look to it as i just put some warm water in a cup and drop the glass inside as i keep sipping my coffee I walk over the living room and sit down as i turn on the tv but it just shows static...probably thanks to the lightning storm last night i sigh to myself as i finish up my cup of coffee and head to the bathroom to brush my teeth and do some laundry After i am done with the laundry i go back and look at the ring as it still look dirty i remove it from the glass of water and look at the ring as i try to put it on my finger and to my surprise it actually fits as well ''Huh...look at that'' i say to myself as i think to myself that maybe i should pawn it i nod but before that i have to take a shower i think as i walk back to the bathroom and turn on the shower and step inside the warm water hits my face and rolls down my back as i start scrubbing myself with some shampoo then washing it out as i turn of the shower and dry my hair quickly and put on a new change of clothes as i decide to head to the pawn shop i put on my shoes and walk outside as something shakes...or not really shakes but...it feels like...im moving but im standing still there is a small flash of light as i close my eyes once i slowly open my eyes back up i look outside and i cannot belive what i see...instead of the usual cars parked on the road...there is no cars...the houses looks...newer somewhat but still very...old the road is made of cobblestone instead of asphalt Several people are outside walking, one man wearing a suit with a woman wearing a yellow dress while the man is smoking a cigar and top hat the woman has short red hair that is curled up towards her head and she is wearing very...distinctive old timey clothing i rub my eyes a few times as i step forward out into the street to see the small shop nearby looks completely different as there is one of those barbershop poles by the door and its full of smoke inside ''What the hell?'' i say to myself as i look around and looks around as i hear a weird strange sounding noise as one of those old timey cars drive past me going reasonably slow... i look around as a gust of wind blows something onto my feet i look down and pick up the piece of paper that looks like a newspaper as i read it ''June...1942...hottest weather of the year...'' ''Wait...1942?!'' i yell as i read it again as a man wearing a suit walks over to me and blows some smoke out from his mouth from the cigar ''hello there good sir, thank you so so much for grabbing my newspaper, Damn thing blew out of my hand while i was reading it'' he laughs as i hand it to him ''Huh but my good sir, you look mighty strange wearing that Garb...say it is foreign perhaps ? say those people come up with new things all the time'' He laughs at me and walks away ''W-Wait!'' i yell at him as i walk over He looks at me with a confused look ''Ah...sir, is something the matter?'' ''Ah...kinda yeah...uh...what year is it ?'' ''You must be joking, its 1942 of course! you should really read a newspaper, it only costs 2 cents over by Timothy's generals'' i say nothing and just look at him with wide eyes as she turns and walks away ''What the hell...1942 ? how the fuck did that happen!'' i say to myself as i walk around the city which looks distinctively...older yet newer in some ways... Looking around i find myself where the pawn shop used to be where there is now a clothing store instead as a couple of women are standing outside smoking one with a stroller as they notice me ''huh...look at that Miranda...those young men are dressing worse and worse by the day'' ''Oh my yes...you are right Sally, it is absolutely dreadful'' they say as the look at me ''you know smoking causes cancer right ? and should you be doing that right next to your kid'' i say to her as she grabs her purse and hits me with it ''Mind your own business you rampant fool! dont meddle in or i will call the cops and have you sent to the Asylum!...smoking causes cancer....have you even heard such nonsense...'' they both scoff at me as i walk over to the park...which is thankfully still there and sit down on a bench as i spot a couple of guys drinking heavily and yelling at each other ''Holy shit...this really is the 1940's but what the hell am i doing here....'' i ask as the ring glows and i hear a voice in my head ''You are meant to be here'' i hear the voice say as i look around ''Hello ?'' i say and look around but there is no one around me ''Do not be alarmed i'm speaking to directly to your mind'' ''.....'' i say nothing ''You were sent back here to correct a mistake we are afraid....you were meant to grow up in this timeline instead of your own one...there was a small mistake and just thanks to the lightning storm we managed to correct it'' ''What the hell...meant to grow up in this timeline ? the 1940's ? for real what the hell kinda stoner talk is that'' ''Oh joke all you will but remember someone is talking to you in your head and you cannot deny this is the 1940's right ? so are you really in the position to demand?'' I shrug as i ponder the situation ''Well i don't care, send me back at once, this is fucking insane'' ''Sorry, we cannot do that, once you go back, going to the future might affect certain things so going forward is impossible i am afraid'' ''So what ? You're saying im stuck in this fucking place ?'' ''Well...stuck and stuck...you were meant to live in this time..so you are not stuck and look on the bright side, you are rich here, we brought back your money and exchanged it into this timelines currency so you are basically a millionaire now'' ''That is...that is kinda awesome...'' i say to myself ''A millionaire....that is awesome!'' ''Yes yes, it is the least we could do but we are afraid there is one more issue to take care of'' ''You see as you were...a mistake in some ways growing up in the wrong timeline that is not the whole story...'' ''Oh damn, what now then !?'' ''Well you see...it is you...or rather...''you'' since this whole thing was a mistake on our part well there is no easy way to say this to you but'' ''But'' i say feeling uneasy ''Well it is you see...it is...Nick right?'' ''Yes....it is'' ''Well it's supposed to be Nicole'' ''Wait what ? what ? say what ?'' i reply back to whatever it is talking to me ''Right then, you were meant to be a girl named Nicole, not a man named Nick So we have to rectify that predicament'' ''What ? no no, that is insane...'' ''Not as insane as going back in time though...right?'' ''Well...yeah...but still'' ''So to explain to you in one simple sentence, you were meant to grow up as a girl in this correct timeline, but due to some mistakes here and there you are not in the correct timeline'' ''So our job is to remedy that and to do that we have to start with your personally So if you would please do not react strongly or cause a scene we will correct that mistake right here and now'' it says as i stand up from the bench and try to remove the ring but its stuck on my finger The ring sends out some kinda electric shock trough my body as i go limp and fall down ''Dont try to remove it or that happens...you have to wear that ring to not mess up the timeline so its is permanently stuck to you now'' ''Now then where did we leave off...oh yes'' It says as my insides starts to feel like they are one fire as i can feel things moving around inside me cracking and fitting into place ''Augh...what the hell was that....'' ''Replacing your male organs just for now, the insides are easier to do since it just overrides and removes some stuff but we did replace it with its female counterparts'' ''it fucking hurt...'' i reply weakly back as i stand up on my legs and crack my fingers ''Ah yes let us start with the fingers'' it says as my fingernails grows longer and my fingers turns longer and more petite as the same happens to my arms as it turns smaller and slender my shoulders turns less broad and instead a bit sharper and smaller ''There...fingers and arms done....this will not take long Nicole so please just remain calm'' ''Remain calm ? what the hell kinda shit is this! who even are you!?'' ''You dont need to know that and you dont want to know that....'' it says in a more sinister tone ''Now then, the legs might be a good next step'' it says as i can feel my feet growing smaller and a loud crack can be heard as my legs grows wider as well as my hips then my ass grows decently larger and rounder ''Corrected'' it says as i look at the ring wanting to just throw it away ''Oh please, dont even try, you know i can read your mind so doing that would just give you yet another electrical shock and you dont really want that now do you?'' ''...I dont...'' i say lowly ''we thought so'' it says ''Now then where did we leave off ? oh yes'' it says as it starts to feel like someone tugging at my hair as it grows longer and longer and rolls down my back as it turns a gentle chestnut brown or blonde color and rolls up back as one side rolls down my shoulder ''Very classical and time precise Nicole'' The voice says ''Very...'' i say back as i sneeze I wipe my nose as the voice exclaims ''Ah yes, of course let us fix the face'' it says as i hear yet another loud crack as my face cracks and contorts as my eyes goes from blue to the same chestnut color as my hair, my lips gets fuller and my takes on a considerably feminine form as i walk over to the nearby lake and look up at my reflection and gasp ''Oh...damn...'' i say lowly to myself as i cover my mouth hearing my new voice ''oh damn...damn...'' i say yet again looking at the reflection in the water ''Yes yes, stop your complaining now'' ''Complaining ? i got every right, i have lived my whole life and now you are telling me that is just a joke ?'' ''Not a joke, a mistake we said'' ''Well whatever...but i look...'' ''You look what?'' ''I look good...that face...'' i say and run my finger across it as it feels gentle and smooth ''Okay okay so what now ?'' i say feeling a bit excited as i say it ''Oh ? that is a little turn around now, are you suddenly excited ?'' ''Well, no...not really but...the money drives me i guess...'' ''oh yes, the money keeps you going you say...'' it says ''Well...yes i mean...look...okay...what do you want me to say?'' ''if i cannot change reality...and this is just fate right ? what can i even do...walk around hating everything and myself and get thrown into jail for female hysteria ?'' ''Ah well, look here now, common sense, such a rarity and yes you probably would so it is smart to take the right choices'' it says as my chest starts to grow poking against my black Band shirt they grow larger and larger and fully develops into full functional breasts ''Now then we only have the last part of your ordeal left Nicole'' I look down as i cup my chest with my hands and looks around ''Mmm...these feels nice...'' i say to myself as i blush ''i do not think this is the right time to fondle yourself now Nicole, please be an upstanding woman of society now'' it says as i feel a weird sensation between my legs it feels like im being pushed up or something pressing against me penis as it just creeps back into my body as a pair of lips and a vagina starts to form down there instead as my hips once again grows a bit wider As it finishes it send a wave of pleasure up trough my body as i let out a gentle moan to myself ''there there Nicole'' ''Yes'' i say in a gentle soft tone ''Now you are who time meant for you to be but let me just fix your clothing as that is definitely going to break reality if someone spots you wearing that and besides as you might as well know, no women wore pants during this time'' ''Oh...yes yes, of course...my mistake'' i say cheerfully ''Please do not excuse yourself miss Nicole, you have nothing to be sorry for'' it says as my pants starts to widen up and creep up my legs as it slowly forms a grey skirt going down below my knees Then my band shirt slowly forms into a grey blazer with six buttons as it pushes against my body getting quite tight my converse shoes slowly start to form into a pair of black high heels with a strap around the ankels and lastly a pair of gloves wrap around my fingers and hands as a small purse forms out of thin air as i grab it ''Oh...this looks cute...and the outfit...its so fitting of the time...'' ''Well of course it is, you're a woman in the 1940's Now Nicole and you have to act like one, unfortunately your mind is something we cannot erase so you will have to learn along as it goes'' I nod as i open the purse and find a huge stack of cash ''Oh my! money! i should put these in a bank like right now...a woman with a wad of cash...this could be scary....'' i say to myself as i put the money back in the purse and hold it in my hand as i walk back into the city and look around as i spot the same women by the clothing store still standing there talking as they notice me i slowly walk over and smiles at me ''Hello...are you new in town?'' one of the women asks me as i nod ''Y-yes hello, my name is Nicole and i just moved here'' i smile ''Oh really ? Well my name is Sally and this is Miranda, it is a pleasure to meet you Nicole and i do have to say, your outfit looks very elegant'' ''Oh this thing...thank you'' i smile Miranda smiles as she looks into her purse and hands me a cigarette ''You must be smoking a lot to keep that lovely figure'' ''Oh...well i really dont...maybe once or twice'' i say as Miranda giggles and gives it to me and lights up as i take i inhale some ''it is truly a miracle cure, it makes you thinner and more beautiful and do excuse me for saying so but a woman without a cigarette in her hand is just not a classy woman'' ''Oh yes Miranda, you are definitely right but you know i just feel like good after taking one'' I just look at them as they keep talking so casually about this ''Ah..So Nicole, Do you have a husband ?'' ''Oh..no, not yet..im afraid'' i say kinda defending myself ''oh Sally, she just moved into town maybe she is just looking for one'' ''oh maybe i can ask Tom ? i think he has some single friends'' ''your husband ? oh yes maybe'' Miranda smiles I smile as i look down at the stroller ''And who is this little one?'' ''Oh that is Eric, he is my little bundle of joy barely a year old'' Sally smiles ''the little man is sleeping so i dont really want to disturb him so i hope you understand Nicole'' I nod at her as i finish up my smoke ''Ah...thank you for that'' i say as the women smile at me ''Oh dont mention it dear, we are happy to see a new face here, but i have to go on home now, my husband should be coming home from work now and i bet he is quite hungry now'' Sally smiles as she smiles at me and Miranda and walk home Miranda looks at me and smiles ''So Nicole let me invite you over to my home if you want to come for a cup of coffee and some cake ?'' ''Oh...really ? that would be quite lovely...thank you Miranda'' Miranda smiles as we walk over to her home and step inside once inside it looks typical 1940's...the old phone on the wall...the lack of...what i am used to but still it has quite the charm to it ''Oh please make yourself at home'' I smile as i sit down on a chair and cross my legs ''Oh my...just been a woman for 1 hour and already making friends and enjoying it....who knew the 1940's was such...different time'' i smile to myself as i am really getting into this Miranda out with a plate of some cake and a cup of coffee for me ''So do tell me about yourself Nicole....where do you come from ?'' ''Oh...i do not want to be rude Miranda but i left my past sort of behind...it was...quite...troubling and i do not really like to talk about it much...'' She looks at me sad and nods ''I see...that is truly horrible i am terribly sorry for asking you'' I just smile as i put my hand on hers ''it is not your fault, you couldn't have known is all...'' She smiles and nods as i remove my hand and take a sip of my coffee ''You have a very nice home...it is so cozy in here'' i say ''Oh, thank you thank you...i just love decorating and flowers so this is my little escape from the world outside'' Some things never change i say to myself ''So...what do you like Nicole ?'' ''Oh...i like...going to resturants...being with my friends...going to the mall...'' i say weakly hoping i dont mess something up ''Oh yes i just adore the mall, it is just so bustling with life and they have quite the nice selection of stores but i have to say, your fashion sense is distinctly...upper class...'' she says looking at me ''Oh yes...my father was a banker and made a lot of money...but as he died and had no other children he gave me all...my mother died when i was very young...'' i say quickly ''Oh..yes i see...so you were an only child?'' she asks me ''Oh well...like i said i dont really like to talk...about the past...'' ''Oh yes...of course of course...'' I look over at Miranda who sips her coffee wearing her red dress with sleeves going down to the ankles ''So then Nicole...have you had anything fun lately?'' ''Fun ? oh no but i did have a strange dream...'' ''Oh ? a strange dream...?'' ''Yes...i had a fever a couple of weeks ago and when i have it i get really tired...so i dream't i was a man...like...several years in the future...it was...very strange'' Miranda giggles and looks at me ''Oh ? my my, did they have flying cars?'' she giggles as i giggle back and shake my head ''oh...do you have someplace to live ?'' i slowly shake my head and sigh ''Well you want to stay here for the night then ?'' ''Well...that would be lovely but i cannot do so for free...let me at least pay for it...'' i say as Miranda lights up another cigarette and smiles at me ''oh please...i will not ask you but if you insist'' she smiles as i look into my purse and hands her a hundred dollar bill She looks at it in shock then over at me then back at the bill ''A-Are...Are you sure ? that is a lot of money...'' she says as i just smile and nod at her ''you are giving me a place to stay...it is the least i can do'' We sit down and chat for several more hours as i learn new things over and over again as Miranda yawns and looks at the clock ''Oh...miranda do not mind if i ask but...do you live here alone ?'' ''Oh..yes...my husband died in the war 4 years ago i am afraid...i have been alone since'' ''Oh...i didnt mean to bring that up...i am sorry'' Miranda smiles and shakes her head ''He died fighting for our country...in my eyes he is a hero Miranda smiles at me as she turns around and walks up the stairs as i look at her while sipping my last cup of coffee ''....oh my dear goddess....'' i say to myself as feel myself getting a bit warmer ''Oh dear heavens..no no...please...i am a woman...it is not right...'' ''But i mean...i used to be...'' ''No no...that is just absurd...i mean...its not but i cannot keep thinking like that...i have to fit in...'' i say as Miranda walks back downstairs and sits down on the sofa ''So then Miranda, you can use the guest bedroom okay ?'' I nod at her as i stand up and walk upstairs to the guest room which just has a single bed and some old drawers there it feels...quite cold I look in the drawers as i find an old nightgown as i remove my clothes and put on the gown as i lie down in bed just thinking about Miranda ''Oh...Fuck it'' i say as i stand back up and walk over to find Miranda in the bathroom i look at her as she looks at me and smiles ''that nightgown fits you very nice i am glad i saved that thing'' I just look at her into the eyes as she goes silent and just looks at me back ''N-Nicole...are you well ?'' she asks as i take a deep breath and looks at her ''I think i am about to do something...stupid'' i say as i move in closer and wrap my arms around her shoulders as i gently leans in and kisses her lips Miranda's eyes goes wide as she pushes me away ''Good heavens Nicole! what has gotten into you! Are you insane!?'' she yells at me as i look at her ''I am not insane Miranda...but...you have just been so kind to me and...look at you...you look so lovely and cute...and it just..felt right'' ''i close my eyes now and see you....and i just want to hold around you...you really...you are just...'' Miranda looks at me and pushes me away as she walks into her bedroom and locks the door i walk over and knock on it but get no reply ''I am...i am so sorry Miranda...'' i say as i walk back to my room and lie down on the cold bed as i close my eyes and just recap my day so far But as i start to recap it my thoughts flood over to Miranda...all i think about is her now...her lovely body...her cute and sweet face...her empathy and compassion...why does these things...turn me on and why do i...as a woman myself...i am killing myself... But i cannot fight these feelings anymore i remove my nightgown and lie down naked in the bed and covers myself with the blanket as i just think about Miranda all night and nothing else The next morning i wake up and look around and quickly get dressed as i find Miranda downstairs listening to the radio ''Good morning'' she says as i walk over and sit down next to her ''Good morning Miranda...'' She turns and looks at me ''i have heard of women like you Nicole...and cannot belive it just happened to me...i cannot get it out of my head what you did to me...i wanted to call the police but...i just couldn't...'' ''i am sorry Miranda...i didn't mean it...'' ''Look Nicole, you are a lovely woman but this...this...is just...absurd...'' i just keep looking at her as i stand up and walks over to her as i hold her hand against my blazer where my breasts are as she stands up and looks at me ''.....'' we say nothing and just look at each other as i yet hear the voice in my head again ''Miss Nicole...if you go down this path...you will live a secrecy...oppression and hate...'' it says to me ''Yes...but i cannot help myself...its not that she is just a woman...but i just cannot help myself...i just cannot...she...she just feel right for me...'' ''Then Miss Nicole...dont fight it...and enjoy this life that was meant to be yours from the start''it says as it fades away ''N-Nicole...'' she stammers but does not remove her hand as i smile at her ''Miranda...'' ''Nicole...'' ''Miranda...i cannot stop my feelings...when i saw you..i just knew...i fell in love...you are everything i have looked for in another person...and i cannot stop thinking about you no matter how hard i try...'' ''But...i am a woman....just like you...'' ''And so what...? does that make it less wrong ? these are my feelings...you dont have to feel the same back but...just be honest to me...'' Miranda sighs i let go of her hand as she looks at me ''....Who...who just are you...'' she says ''Just a woman like you'' i smile back I see a smile across Her face as she giggles and looks at me ''No one has to know...right?'' I nod at her ''We can move away and start a life for ourselves....'' ''Then...Y-yes...i will give this a chance but what would i even call you?'' I lean in and kiss her lips lovingly ''Wives at some point maybe ? or maybe just...girlfriends'' ''Wives...me being a wife to a woman...oh my....i would have never...but...you kiss...good'' i giggle and smile at her ''And so do you Miranda...my dear...'' ''Oh Nicole...i dont understand you but...i am sure i will soon'' she smiles at me as i kiss her lips again and giggle at her ''i know something i want to try with you...if you so desire to follow me upstairs...'' Miranda looks at me confused as we head upstairs and i show her a whole new word...just as she did to me...

[benjaminpoulter]

10 Easy Money Habits That Will Help Build Wealth In 2021

It doesn’t matter what are you are, A habit can develop in anyone.

The trick is to keep the bad habits, use 10 Easy Money Habits That Will Help Build Wealth In 2021.

Focus On What You Can Control.

There has been many things going on in the world at the beginning of 2021, most of it has carried over from 2020.

However, personally we cannot control what goes on in the world. That should not be a main focus at the moment.

If we stop watching so many news reports and concentrate on what matters. The task at hand.

I myself am a victim of this and have so many tabs open on the computer. So many things Im trying to do, articles I keep meaning to read.

Get rid of them and close them down!

If the local government tells you to say at home — Dont go out and protest. That sort of thing will get you nowhere.

If you need to generate traffic to your business inn order to make money for your family, Thats down to you.

That’s what you should focus on!

The Early Bird Catches The Worm

That’s what my dad used to say all the time to get me out of bed. He was complacently right.

If you wake up and maybe laze in bed for an hour, maybe snooze the alarm. Its going to have a knock on effect through the day.

This goes the same for getting a good night sleep. Your body will need to recharge, so give yourself a good nights sleep in order to function properly.

When you get up early and begin to go through your daily tasks, if you get out of bed early there is more time to get things done.

Its a medical proven fact that there are Effects of Sleep Deprivation on Brain Functional Network.

The 10 Easy Money Habits That Will Help Build Wealth In 2021 can be put into effect from today.

Fuel you brain and body

Look at your body as a machine — A well oiled machine will function much better when it is maintained.

Think about when you are hungry. You body is craving energy to function.

What you put into your body will inevitably have a reaction to what the output is.

For example:

We drink 3 cups of coffee and we are rearing to go and are wide awake. But what goes up must come down.

It we eat healthy and drink plenty of water along with a good amount of exercise, Our body and brain will give us the best performance it can.

I’m not saying you have to join a gym to be able to achieve this, but eating health and taking part in exercise is going to help you get the best out of the body.

Set Yourself Goals

If you are anything like me you have a million and one things you want to get done. Sometimes we give ourselves such a high target that we get disappointed if we don’t achieve them.

So when we sit down at the beginning of the week and set a goal for each day, we have a direction in which we are heading.

Then if on that particular day we reach that goal it is down to us to go above and beyond. This way we feel a sense of achievement and it feels like we are getting progress.

Having a goal can also help you stay focused on the task in hand. You know what you need to get done that day, so you close all other tabs that will distract you from that task.

Tip — Maybe put your phone on silent too and everything pings up on there 😏

Reading Books to help Build Wealth In 2021

I never used to read many books at all. The only time I would pick a book up was if I was on a long flight where there was nothing else to do.

Or of course reading to the children when they were young 😁.

But I never knew the importance of reading in order to grow the knowledge in your brain.

Think of it as if you wanted to have big muscles, you go to the gym and do exercises to improve the size of your muscleses in your arms.

This works escaley the same for your brain. The more information you feed into your brain the better it will function.

They say that traveling the world can educate the mind of a wise man. Depending on what type of books you read they can open your mind up to completely new way of thinking.

Break The Bad Habits

Bad habits are in every single person. Weather it be from sitting down in front of the TV and bingeing on a boxset to getting caught up in a rabbit hole looking for an answer on the internet.

Its the shiny object syndrome in us all.

https://youtu.be/7Of0sMa6gqE

I have even been caught up in it and not even know its happening. This all come back to focusing on the task in hand.

It all leads back to 10 Easy Money Habits That Will Help Build Wealth In 2021.

Get Honest With Yourself

I can keep telling myself that Im doing the best I can. I can do any better because I am actually putting in 110%.

Really? Are You?

So why did I spend an hour watching motorbike car chase on youtube!

Things like this, where you convince yourself that it needed to be done, or I was just taking 5 minutes but it turned into an hour!

You smiling right now right! Yes you!

Take 5 minutes for some fresh air and stretch your legs but dont get distracted into doing something else.

If you have you mind set on the goals in hand you are more then likely to reach them goals by breaking the bad habits.

Dont Stay Stuck

There will always be challenges that come up. In order to overcome the certain challenge always have a plan to resolve the problem and do it.

Its human nature that we feel we have to figure everything out on our own. When we have this mindset it will lead us down a path where we give up or start something else.

The thing is that problem will almost always come back up another day.

We have the power of the internet at our finger tips and there are lots of people willing to help at the push of a button.

Weather you are part of a group on social media or simply use google to find the answer — Don’t stay stuck!

9 times out of 10 there is someone else out there who has encounted the same problem you are having.

If you just ASK for help the problem will get resolved a lot quicker and keep you moving forward.

Work Out a Strategy

Having a strategy to what your doing will help you have a clear plan of where your heading.

For me it is -

Create content on my blog

Repurpose that content of different platforms

Engage with people in my network

Repeat

The more content I have out on the internet, the more people will engage and interact with me and my business.

Once you have worked out the strategy STICK to it.

Also if its a proven method that works for many other people who have been successful in the same business you are building, stick to that strategy until you see results.

I can understand that when your working on a strategy and not getting the results you had hoped for, it can be disheartening at first.

But being consistent and sticking to the plan is going to help in the long run.

Track Your Progress of Money habits

Running your own business is a numbers game. The more you create — the more you will be noticed.

If you track the engagement on an article or post to see what your target audience is interested in it will help in the future.

When a piece of content has high engagement you can use that as a signel that you audience interested in what you have put out.

Take note of what that content was about, also the comments which people have spoken about. Use your audience to figure out your next step.

Above everything else — NEVER GIVE UP! if you dont try your wont succeed.

These 10 Easy Money Habits That Will Help Build Wealth In 2021 and for the rest of your time whiles building business.

Breaking bad habits and developing new ones that keep pushing you forward is the only way to go.

[castielcoven]

[ I'm new to Tumblr, give me a break, honestly. Would appreciate some constructive criticism, thanks! Also yes, I'm not the smartest, so *please* no calling me dumb, I already know I am TwT, 3,151 words and weird, old original characters. I doubt anyones gonna read this but if you do good luck 😂]

"Matthew, honey?" Michelle chimed as she heard her front door shut, and in came her son, who was barely smaller than her, he had a very large bruise on the side of his eye.

      "Hey mama…" He mumbled, she sighed sadly and held the boy's hand, pulling him gently to the kitchen and getting an ice pack after he sat down, the all too familiar small hissing sound coming from beside him. Matthew smiled softly as he looked at his adorable de-fanged snake hissing at him gently, wanting attention. He giggled and pet her head gently, she began to slither her way up into Matthew's lap, her forked tongue licking his nose softly. He laughed and kissed Nature's head softly. Michelle smiled.

     "There hasn't been any new updates on the court case." She sighed, pulling out her phone and snapping a photo of his black eye and bruise. "Are there anymore?" She asked, looking at him, Matthew nodded and set Nature on the kitchen table, standing up and pulling his turtle neck off. Michelle cringed and inhaled sharply at her sons bruised and scabbed over torso. "Gods...Baby, I'm so sorry. I ought to have full custody of you by now, but there are these other people trying to fight for you…" She told, shaking and taking the pictures.

      "Really…? Who?" He asked, pulling on his turtle neck again and sitting down. Nature slithered in his lap after waiting patiently while Matthew pulled up his tights to show the bruises on his legs, Michelle sighed sadly and took the pictures.

      "A doctor and cop. I don't know who they are, they're anonymous, and the judge won't even tell me why they're fighting for you. I promise you baby, I'll win this court case. You'll be safe in my arms soon." She shook and sobbed a bit, hugging Matthew who nodded and hugged her back, Nature smushed between them, but the snake wasn't complaining.

      "I hope so…" He shook, clutching her. "I'm gonna go lay down...I-I need a nap…" He shook, biting his lip softly.

      "Alright honey. I'll wake you up for lunch." She told, pressing a gentle kiss to his bruise. Matthew just took Nature, going up to his room, setting her on the bed gently as he went to change into thermals. He shuddered and bit his lip as he looked at himself in his full body mirror. It was their routine for a while. He would come home from a tortuous week of beatings from his father, he would walk half way across town to his mothers since his father refused to drive him, he would strip and she'd take photos for evidence against his father, he'd put his clothes on and take a nap. It was stupid, and tedious, but he couldn't help it. He desperately wanted his schedule to change, wanting SOMETHING, to be different, but so far, nothing was popping up.

     "Hi there, miss! My name is Jacob Otori, I- Oh! Mrs. Anderson, hi!" Jacob laughed, Michelle giggled.

     "Hi there Jacob, odd for you to come to my house, eh?" She giggled. Matthew heard the all too familiar voice of his crush and patted out of his room to listen to the conversation.

     "I didn't know it was your house! It's very nice, ma'am!" He smiled. "I was going around and promoting the fundraiser. I wanna beat last year's goal. We raised just above 300k last time, I'm aiming for 750k this time." He smiled brightly. Michelle looked at him shocked.

      "Wow, you certainly are confident. We are just a small town, Jacob." She sighed with a smile. 

      "It was Natali who set the goal, I really just said I wanna beat how much we raised last year, I didn't really have a say since she's the treasurer." He giggled.

      "I find it amazing. I'm definitely donating this year. Oh! Do you wanna come in? Matthews here for the weekend, he's taking a nap at the moment, but he always wakes up in around an hour. Would you like some tea?" She smiled.

      "Oh, Matthew? Like the one with the wildly dyed hair?...I barely really know him, I didn't know you had a son." He smiled awkwardly. 'I have heard of him, everyone says he's a freak, though...I should give everyone a chance, those are just rumors. And I need a break, talking to people is tiring…'

      "Oh, yes. I sometimes forget he dyes his hair, it obviously doesn't look natural, but he's had it for so long it just looks normal to me." She hummed.

      "I wouldn't want to be a bother…" He smiled again, chuckling awkwardly.

      "I'm gonna tell you the truth because you're such a good guy, Jacob, but Matthew has a hard time making friends since he's so anti-social. I know he doesn't have any friends at school, and I'm just trying to get him at least a caring friend like you. Im aware of all of the rumors about him, and I'll tell you most of them aren't true. There's a lot that's been going on lately, I'm trying to win custody of him from his father, but that isn't going well…" She admitted, looking down. Jacob was a bit shocked, but intrigued. "It's been the same thing over and over every time he comes here, I can tell he's stressed and school isn't helping, nor is my counseling. I just want to make sure he has a friend I know is a good influence on him and is a sweet caring person. Especially one he can tell things that he wont tell me, it is sometimes better to get it out in the open than just keep it bottled up. I know he's not telling me quite a few things, and I just want to make sure he's okay. So please do me a favor and at least attempt to befriend my anti-social son?" She hummed, looking up at Jacob with a slightly pleading look in her eyes. Jacob was very prone to giving in to puppy dog eyes.

      "Of course, ma'am. I've actually been trying to figure out a way to approach him, not only because of all of the rumors, but there have been major scenes with him, like passing out in class, his panic attacks...I'm not making fun of him or anything, but a lot of the other kids did...And I just recently realized he was in most of my classes. When I started actually paying attention to him, no one really notices him, and sometimes he'll just leave the room without saying anything. The teachers know it too, they'll either watch him, or ask a student to go check on him." He ranted, looking away awkwardly. "And I've caught him staring at me multiple times, I think that's what made it so hard to approach him. Most of the rumors I've heard about him is that he's gay and has a crush on me. I don't really mind, but everyone makes it seem like such a bad thing." He told, Michelle listened, pulling Jacob into her home, which he obliged too. Matthew was still listening.

      "Matthew isn't very mentally stable. He has insomnia, very bad anxiety, not to mention he was always and is bullied due to looking like and dressing like a girl." She sighed.

      "I don't see a problem with it, really. I don't understand why some kids bully this practically invisible kid because he doesn't like to act his gender. Natali and Tash both act more manly than me and no one bullies them." He chuckled bashfully, Michelle giggled.

      "If only more people had your mindset Jacob, such an uplifting personality. Matthew comes to my office anytime he feels like he's going to have a panic attack. I'm guessing he's noticed your staring lately, because its people looking at him that stresses him out." She smiled.

      "Oh…! I'm very sorry, I didn't realize...I guess it was always weird he just left the room without alarm whenever I stared at him." He mumbled, sighing.

      "I tell the teachers about Matthew, they feel bad for him, so they basically let him do what he wants, as long as he gets his work done. Which he always does." She sighed, glancing up at the stairs and seeing Matthew up there she perked up, giggling a bit. "Matt, it's not nice to eavesdrop." She mentioned, making Matthew jump and Jacob raise an eyebrow before turning around and looking at the boy, who squeaked and ran to his room. Jacob was a bit confused while Michelle giggled. "He eavesdrops a lot. He's quite sneaky. Like you said, he's practically invisible." She smiled.

       "Ah, yeah." He sighed, giggling softly.

       "Oh, and if he does come down, just a warning he had a bad bruise on his eye, he told me it was some bullies at school." She sighed a bit, Jacob immediately felt bad, but he also wondered how bad it was.

      "Ah, I'm sorry ma'am. I let myself think I always catch the bullying at school, but clearly not." He mumbled.

       "It's okay, sweetie, no ones perfect. Thats half of the reason I want Matthew to have friends...You would tell me whats going on, while he doesn't tell me the names of his bullies because he doesn't want to get them in trouble." She sighed, shaking her head softly. "Matt? Are you gonna come down?" She called out, Matthew was shaking a bit, thinking it over. "Come on, honey. Jacobs here, he's a classmate, don't you think you should at least greet him?" She told.

      "Uhmmm...No?" He asked more as a question.

      "Maaaatt." Michelle sighed, Matthew just padded off to his own room. "Sorry...He's not good around people. Especially not any that are his age." She sighed. "I'm going to get a kettle boiling. Feel free to go and talk to Matt." She smiled, standing up and walking to the kitchen. Jacob smiled and nodded, this was his chance to befriend the weird kid. He stood up, beginning to walk upstairs, he got to the door he thought was Matthews, beginning to knock on it. Said boy had creaked his door open to watch him knock on the door.

       "Uhm...Matthew?" He asked out, looking at the door.

       "That's the bathroom." The adorable bluenette mentioned quietly, the redhead flinched and turned around, his face bright red as he looked at the half of Matthews being from behind the door.

       "Right…! I knew that!" He looked away awkwardly, making Matthew giggle. Jacob was a bit astonished he made the unusually quiet boy laugh. He was the first time he had even heard his voice. "Ah, uh- c-can I come in??" He smiled. "You were listening in on our conversation...I don't know for how long but you probably heard I had been looking for a way to approach you, y'know to be your friend." He smiled.

      "I was listening since the beginning. You don't have to be my friend just because my mom asked you too. I'm the weird kid, you don't have to pretend like I'm any normal person." He hummed, looking at the floor.

      "Its not just because of what your mom said! I really had been trying to find a way to talk to you, but anytime I tried, you just ended up walking out of the classroom…" He told.

      "I didn't know why you were staring at me, it was stressing me out." He mumbled, looking away as his face lit up slightly.

      "Understandable, but really, I do wanna be your friend. I guess we should get properly acquainted first." He hummed, clearing his throat and bowing politely. "My name is Jacob Otori, I'm from Japan, I'm 17 and I know both Chinese and Japanese." He smiled, Matthew giggled a bit at the formal introduction. "Now your turn, if you wanna, that is." He smiled patiently.

       "U-uhmm...I-I'm Matthew Anderson, I'm 16, going to be 17 in October...U-uhm...I-I'm from Canada, I can s-speak French, G-Greek and Latin." He explained, shaking and looking away awkwardly, wondering if he sounded like he was bragging.

        "You can speak French and Greek?? Wow! Honestly, Chinese and Japanese are so boring, but you got to have the tongue of a GOD to speak that complicated stuff!" He laughed, smiling. Matthew giggled, which actually turned into a laugh.

       "Well...I-It is hard...B-But I can try to teach you." He mumbled, looking away slightly and shifting around.

       "Really?! You would? Thats awesome!" He smiled brightly, Matthew smiled back awkwardly, but it was a genuine smile.

       "Yeah...Uhm...Y-you can come in, but...uh…" He blushed madly, looking away in a bit of embarrassment.

       "I'm not gonna judge you for anything you say, have, or do. Unless its just that bad, which you don't even look like you're capable of doing." He giggled, Matthew just laughed back awkwardly.

       "O-okay...But it's still kind of embarrassing since I've never had anyone over before. My room's a bit...girly." He told, blushing. And opening his door, dashing back in slightly. Jacob just raised an eyebrow and walked in, finally seeing what Matthew meant. It looked like a room Natali would enjoy. The walls were a milk pink, the ceiling lined with star fairy lights which were illuminating a room. There was also a floor lamp and more than enough pop band posters literally any teenage girl would be obsessed with. He had a full sized bed, which was incredibly messy, but he had a cotton pink and blue blanket with bright white pillows. He had a small TV on a vanity which had makeup and school supplies around it, a few bean bags, and a rug and in the corner, the opposite of his bed, was a huge tank, but Nature was nowhere to be found. He also had a closet in the corner.

       "Woah." He was only able to say. "This looks like a damn sanctuary! If only my room looked like this." He laughed. Matthew blushed.

       "Really? It's so girly, though." He mumbled.

       "So? I like girly things. I would kill for a room like this!" He laughed, Matthew smiled and giggled.

       "Well...uhm, thanks." He giggled, smiling adorably. Jacob just smiled back.

       "What do you wanna do? We could have a sleepover! My parents went out to fly home for their anniversary, so I'm free to do whatever." He hummed.

        "S-sure...I'm sure mom wouldn't mind. And i-its an excuse to stay here instead of going to my fathers." He mumbled.

        "Is it too personal to ask, or can I ask what exactly is bad at your dads? There are rumors around the school that he beats you, but your mom said most of those rumors aren't true." He asked, looking at Matthew who curled up to himself silently. Jacob immediately took that as a yes. He gasped quietly and crawled onto his bed with him, hugging him as gently as he could. "I'm sorry...My dads a cop, you know. We could report him." He told, rubbing his side gently as Matthew leaned into his touch.

        "H-he always wins assault court cases. No one knows how...Its been difficult for mama to get custody of me because there's a third couple trying to get me. She doesn't know them, and I don't know them. They're anonymous…" He told, shaking and snuggling into him.

        "Well my dad would make sure he gets to prison. This isn't just assault, its child abuse, Matt. Child endangerment, and this third party trying to get you? Who knows what's going on, but my parents would help your mother get custody of you." He mumbled, Matthew sniffled a bit.

        "Please don't tell anybody the rumour is true…" He told, his lip quivering.

        "Hey, hey, don't cry. I'm not going to tell anyone. I can't believe someone actually spread around something that personal, and not to mention they make fun of you for it." He sighed, pressing a small kiss to Matthews forehead, making the small Canadian blush madly.

        "Th-thanks…" He mumbled, shaking. "W-wanna watch some TV? We have cable, but we also have hulu and netflix." He giggled quietly. "The desk I have is for natures tank and not the TV, so we have to sit on the beanbags." He smiled, pointing to the two purple beanbags sitting on the fuzzy rug.

        "Ah, so...What is Nature? Like what kind of animal is it? I don't recognize the tank…" He told, following Matthew, watching him plop down on the beanbag, sitting on the other one as he grabbed the remote.

        "Nature's my snake." He told as if it weren't a psychotic thing, Jacob stared at him.

        "That's the last kind of pet I'd expect you to have." He mumbled, Matthew laughed.

        "I have a mouse too, his names Dumpy." He told, pointing to the small cage underneath the vanity that was previously unseen.

        "Dumpy?" Jacob laughed. "What kind of snake do you have? I'm surprised it hasn't eaten the mouse…" He admitted.

        "Natures a domesticated snake. She's an Inland Taipan." He told, Jacob flinched and looked at Matthew dead in the eye.

        "That is literally the most poisonous snakes in the world!" He called out in shock, looking around to find the snake, she wasn't in her tank and that was suddenly stressing him out.

        "She domesticated, don't worry. She doesn't bite, she's actually really sweet, I've had her since I was six." He hummed. "She's 11 years old and I pulled out her fangs when I was little." He told.

       "You're being serious?! You ripped out the most poisonous snake evers fangs?!" He stared at him with a startled expression.

       "I don't really know where Nature is." He told, whistling a few times.

       "Don't call her please-" He begged as a slithering was heard, her head popping out from under the door and slithering in, Matthew smiled as Jacob yelped and fell off of the beanbag.

       "She's fine, really. Nature, show Jacob your teeth." He told the snake who slithered over to him, staying a lengths away, smelling his fear. She opened her mouth and showed her lack of fangs. "You can pet her, really she isn't violent." Matthew giggled and walked over, Nature watching her master. "Nature, love on Jacob." He smiled, petting her head softly as she slithered over to the Japanese American man, looking at him.

      "Why's it staring at me." He asked, staring back at her.

      "Let out your hand." Matthew giggled. "You saw she doesn't have fangs, shes harmless." He giggled. Jacob was still hesitant. "Nature, bite me. Show him you're harmless." He told, holding out his hand, Nature immediately dashed and bit in his hand, pulling away and licking Matthews hand and looking at Jacob, making sure he was looking at the nonexistent bites on her master's hand.

[wonkyuna-blog]

Save Myself

Genre: Fluff, M / M

Im Changkyun x Yoo Kihyun Summary: When you’re so used to caring and emotionally providing for someone else you often lose sight of who you are and what you want for yourself. Changkyun, forced from the relationship he carried on his own shoulders, now seeks to reclaim his individuality and rebuild a life for himself.

Word Count: 7.2k+

Warnings: Toxic relationship

/// Author’s Note /// My piece for @mxnetwork for the Lyrical Writing thingy! I chose Save Myself by Ed Sheeran

Changkyun rolled back to his side of the bed, panting and chasing after his breath. He looked back towards you, sweat gleaming off your skin almost glittering in the moonlight shining through the open window. It was sweltering in the middle of July. Too hot to function but Changkyun would never pass up makeup sex. He felt really guilty that y/n had been home all day with the broken ac unit while he was at work. When he had returned home to your shared apartment you ripped into him about not calling someone earlier while you basically melted from the heat.

“I’m sorry baby, I had no idea or else you know I would have taken care of it immediately. Did you try calling anyone from the HVAC place?”

“No, obviously not. That’s your job. I haven’t had the time to do much of anything all day since I was practically dying of heat exhaustion!” You huffed at him.

“Ah, you’re right. I’m so sorry. I’ll call someone in the tomorrow and get it fixed as soon as possible, okay?”

You took a deep breath, content. “You had better, or I’m leaving.”

“No, please! Listen, I’ll send the company an email right now then wake up first thing in the morning and call so they get my message either way, okay? Everything will be fine y/n, I promise.” Changkyun waited for your answer while he fidgeted nervously. The tension was growing too much and he felt like bargaining anything just to have you calm down.  

“Fine, but you’re still going to have to make this up to me.” You turned to face him and gave him a look he knew all too well.

“Whatever you need baby, let me make it better.”

You looked so beautiful under the moonlight. The room was painted blue from the softness of it caressing every surface unhidden from shadow. Changkyun had hoped this would quell the fire in your heart from him letting you down, again. He wanted to make everything better for not taking care of you like he should have been.   Checking the AC unit before he walked out the door in the first place had been on the back of his mind but he didn’t think to actually look. He had been running late anyway trying to clean up the house so you could relax comfortably while he was gone. You had both been together for almost three years now and he knew that as long as you were happy, you both were. He tried pulling you into him so you could fall asleep together, wrapped up and safe; but you pushed him away and grunted, “too hot.” You flipped to your side facing away from him and remained silent.

That following morning Changkyun woke up early to contact someone that could come out and work on the cooling unit. It was only a small dent in everything he had planned today, though he knew he could work through it with little issues.   Today was the third anniversary of your relationship together and Changkyun had taken off work for the entire day to spend it with you. He excited himself thinking about holding your hand and going to your favorite places, eating the most delicious food, and spending the day reconnecting with one another. He started the day off with making you breakfast. Changkyun was waiting for the food to finish cooking as he set the table. You stepped into the dining room after just waking up, puzzled. “What are you doing?”

“Y/n! I hope you’re hungry because I’m cooking us a huge breakfast.”

You stood where you were and rubbed the sleep from your eyes. “Changkyun…”, you sighed.

“Yes?” He beamed up at you while setting the last fork down next to an empty plate.

“We have to talk.” You wore a blank expression and withheld any emotion you may be feeling.

“Oh? You aren’t still mad about yesterday, are you?” Changkyun’s heart began to race as he felt stress building in his head. He started to walk back towards the kitchen to tend to the food cooking on the stove as he continued. “I called the guy to come out before you woke up, so he should be here at some point in the afternoon. Plus, I’ve got a plan to completely make up for it by the end of-”

“Changkyun”, you interrupted, “we need to break up.”

He stopped where he was, back turned to you, and stood there while he processed what you had just said. “What?” His voice cracked and he slowly spun around to face you.

“I can’t do this anymore Changkyun.” You were being incredibly vague, so Changkyun was having a really hard time understanding.

“But… y/n it’s our anniversary… did I do something wrong?” He began to fidget, his fingers searching for anything to relieve the anxiety creeping into his chest.

“No… I-… yes. This just isn’t enough for me. I don’t know how to make this work and I shouldn’t have to. It just… should.” You threw your hands up and let them fall hard. You didn’t want to continue the conversation any longer.

“Y/n, whatever it is we can work on it and I can fix it. You just have to tell me-” Changkyun began to beg, he didn’t want it to end like this. Especially not today.

“It’s done, Changkyun. I’m done.”   You turned to walk away and locked yourself in the bedroom. Changkyun wanted to fight so badly, but a bigger part of him felt defeated. He didn’t know what went wrong. You were both so happy.   The fire alarm began to sound off.

Changkyun woke up in a sweat. He had been having the same nightmare for two weeks now, and was awakened each time by the alarm sounding off in his mind. The piercing shrill of it burned like a metaphor into his memory.   It was dawn, so he decided to recollect himself with a shower and head downstairs to make himself a cup of coffee to get his day started. He bounced down to the bottom step to see his mother at the kitchen table having breakfast. He had come to live with her again after the breakup since Changkyun let y/n stay in their apartment. A choice he was scolded by his mother for, since in her opinion they decided to leave the relationship so they should be the one to actually leave and not Changkyun. Still, she welcomed him home with open arms and warm meals every night. She was happy to have him back.

“Good morning! How are you feeling today?” She also took the time to check up on his recovery. His mother knew how hard of a breakup this had been for Changkyun, and she wanted to make sure that he was taking the right steps to come out of it okay.

He walked over towards the coffee maker and prepared a brew for himself. “Had the nightmare again.”  

His mother looked him up and down, his disheveled appearance causing her body language to slump too.   “You take all the time you need to recover dear. I know how much they meant to you, and no amount of time taken to get past this makes you any less of what you are.”  

“I know mom, thanks.”   After the brew was finished Changkyun silently filled his cup and shuffled back upstairs to his room.

He had been doing nothing but lay in bed since being back with his mother the past week. The week before was filled with awkward co-habitation with you. Even now, though, all that filled his head was y/n. He couldn’t shake it, he didn’t know what to do. He had gone through all the emotional stages but was still a heavy mix of angry and hopeless. Though he felt he was lucky enough to still have his mother in his life, during Changkyun’s relationship he had lost ties with all his friends and most family members. He was completely alone in the world because of y/n since you wanted him all to yourself constantly. Any attention you were stripped of sent you into emotional turmoil.   Changkyun knew he had to break out of the shell he had put himself into. He sat down at his computer and pulled up a local classified ad to make his first step: get a new job. There was no real use thinking about the past anymore and he knew he needed to move forward. It was worth it to distract himself, he thought.

He had finished applying for a grocery store and a pastry shop before seeing an offer that actually pulled his attention. He had never thought about working in a book store before, but he imagined it being peaceful and positive. That’s what you needed to recover with, right? So he filled in for the shop called Blue Moon Books, and anxiously awaited a possible phone call.

Two days later Changkyun’s mother visited him while he lay in his bed moping. It was morning and there had been no phone call from any job he applied for thus far, and he was trying his best to remain patient. The only problem was that he felt incredibly lonely, and sitting with his thoughts to himself wasn’t the best right now. He’d stare into the ceiling and think about those nights where he and y/n would sink into each other on the living room couch. You would fight with him over what to watch and tell him what he liked to watch was stupid, but Changkyun could only see the glow of the television illuminating the beautiful features of her face as she offered only an annoyed expression at him. Anything you wanted to make you happy, he would provide for you. “Honey, can I come in?” He heard a quiet rasping outside his door, his mother had come home from her late night shift.

“Sure thing, mom.” He sat up to make room for her on his bed as she took a seat next to him.  

“I really want to talk to you about all of this that’s been going on with you lately. It’s been almost 3 weeks now, and I don’t want to press but I think it’d be good for you to talk about this. You’ve been kinda mopey lately and I thought we were making good progress. I don’t want you to get discouraged though, you can have set backs. I’m just… I’m just worried about you sweetie.” She fidgeted with her hands, nervous. Clearly she was uncomfortable pushing Changkyun when she wasn’t sure if he was ready yet.

Changkyun looked to his feet and stared silently into space for a while. He actually wasn’t sure if he was ready to face the reality - at least talking about it made what happened seem more real than it should anyway. His mother was right though, it was time to talk about it and there was no one better than her.

“I just… I don’t know where to start mom.” He couldn’t look at her or he knew he’d start crying. “I just don’t know what happened, ah.” His voice began to crack. “We got in a little fight about the AC unit, and I took care of everything but then this still happened.” He circled with his hands to make a visual representation of, ‘all this’, then let them fall as he felt completely defeated.

“Changkyun, if you can walk through what did happen that day with me, please. I want to understand just like you do.” She reached over and rubbed his back in a figure eight motion to try and get him to relax.

He let out a deep sigh and squeezed his temple between his fingers. His mother was all he had left in the world. She had let him live there again with her, so it seemed only fair to let her hear what her son had gone through. “I don’t know mom, it was mostly a lot of confusion. I came home that night from work and y/n hadn’t spoken to me all day. I didn’t bother them, felt they needed some space you know, and I was fine with that. The second I walked through the door though, they absolutely blew up on me. It was like a bomb went off. Screaming incoherent sentences, I just wanted them to calm down so I could fix whatever was wrong. They finally brought it down enough to tell me the air conditioner had been broken all day with them in the apartment basically melting, and they were upset that I hadn’t done anything about it.”

Changkyun’s mother nodded. “Did you know about it before coming home?”  

“Well… no, but I just felt so bad for them and I understand why they were mad but….” Changkyun began to fidget with his hands then when his mother continued talking.  

“You shouldn’t feel bad for them being a lazy piece of shit.”  

“Mom!” He had never heard her curse before.  

“I’m sorry hun, I just don’t think that was handled right at all. On their end, anyway.”

“Well, they broke up with me the next day anyway so it doesn’t matter anymore.” He felt himself growing distant when this discussion became uncomfortable. His mother was protective of him, and obviously held a grudge for y/n isolating her only son from everyone else in the world. Just then Changkyun’s phone began to ring, and to his joy interrupted their conversation. “Hello?”

“Hello! I’m calling for a… Changkyun?”

“Yes, speaking.”

“Hey! My name is Shownu, I’m calling from Blue Moon Books about your application? I’ve just finished reviewing it and was wondering when you might be available for an interview?”

Changkyun had to recover his heart from his stomach after hearing his quick speech. “Y-yes! When would be best for you? I’m free all this week actually.”

“Great! Come by the shop around 2pm today and we can get you all set up!”

“I’ll be there, thank you so much!” The call ended and Changkyun looked back to his mother who was giving him a confused expression.

“Mom, I have an interview with that book store I was telling you about.” He almost couldn’t believe the words that spilled from his mouth. It didn’t exactly seem like that big of a deal, but he was proud of himself for taking some first few steps at getting his life back up and going.

“That’s great! Well, go get washed up for it I won’t keep you!” His mother rushed out of the room, all smiles.

Main-street was busy and bustling. The smell of fresh bread hung in the air from the bakery Changkyun walked past, he was almost tempted to go in but he had his mind focused on meeting Shownu. It was a beautiful, bright day and he felt more confident than usual about his budding opportunity.   Changkyun arrived at the shop twenty minutes before his interview since wanted to look around for a bit and see how he felt about the atmosphere of the store. He was able to walk there because it was only a few minutes away from his mother’s home settled on a calmer street section in the city, down further from the claustrophobic feeling the beginning of main street held. The building, marked with large blue lettering that of course read 'Blue Moon Books’, had single pane front windows with book displays and popular character models in an attempt to draw in curious eyes.   As soon as he walked in the aroma of pressed espresso had washed over his senses. It was rather quiet in the store aside from the barista preparing coffee with quick hands. He was a tall, brilliantly tanned man with golden blonde hair pulled into a short pony tail. His gaze was fixated on his task and one could tell he held a certain passion for the job he performed.   The store itself was impressively organized with volumes upon volumes of whatever genre one would be in the mood for. Mystery, drama, comedy, love, it was all here and categorized by the genre itself, then by the author. Two more men stood at the counter as Changkyun continued deeper into the store. One with a rounded face and eyes that held their own kind of smile, he looked genuine. He was speaking with a larger, broad shouldered man whom Changkyun assumed must be the manager, Shownu, that he spoke on the phone with. He carried himself high and looked to be giving direction. The first man looked to Changkyun and broke their conversation.  

“Is there anything I can help you with sir?” He leaned on the counter, propped up by his elbows.

“Yes, actually. I’m here for an interview.” Changkyun straightened his back out and tried his best to look what he felt was professional.

As if it were rehearsed the man presumed to be Shownu stepped forward with a large smile. “That would be me! And you would be Changkyun? It’s a pleasure to meet you.”  

“Likewise, sir.” Changkyun felt incredibly at ease then, even though he was speaking with an employer. He felt good about this. Shownu stepped from behind the counter to extend his hand in greeting. Changkyun took this opportunity to look him over and was slightly amused by his visage.   Shownu looked like someone that should be at the gym right now or at a fighting match proving his own strength. Instead, this hulking mass was managing a quiet book shop on main street. Nothing wrong with that, of course, Changkyun thought to himself. Rather amusing in the simplest means. It was humbling if nothing else.

“Let’s take a walk around while you tell me about yourself.” Shownu placed a gentle hand on Changkyun’s shoulder as the two of them began to walk the shop together.  

“I’ve never seen a shop so spacious yet so filled before.” Changkyun marveled. He had hoped that didn’t come out as an attempt of flattery. Maybe he was nervous after all.

“Tell me, why do you want this job?” Shownu kept his eyes forward, listening intently.

Right to it, then. “Well, truthfully sir… I just got through a pretty rough breakup… and I’m looking for something not so stressful and where I can grow into myself again. Just… I guess something to focus on.” He had hoped it wasn’t painfully obvious that he had rehearsed that line over and over on his way to the shop that day. Even though he did hesitate a few times. Shownu was mostly quiet, they had stopped walking while Changkyun awaited a response.  

“Well Changkyun, we are a small family here. I’ll be straight forward with you, I need an extra hand with the register and with organization. Business is really picking up and I need more people at the counter than just one person. I’ve been through the other interviews today and you’re the first that has been pretty laid back instead of attempting to flatter me with business speak and talking out their ass the whole time. Plus, if you’re going through a tough time who am I to turn down someone looking to bring purpose and structure back to their life?” He paused, cleared his throat, and extended his hand towards Changkyun. “If you can start tomorrow, the job is yours.”  

“I’ll even start today if you need me to.”  

Shownu chuckled at his response. “I appreciate your enthusiasm, kid. Just go rest up and be here tomorrow by 8am.”  

“Absolutely! Thank you so much.” Changkyun, ecstatic, ran out the door to go prepare and tell his mother the good news. Main street had died down by this point, so he decided to burst into a full on sprint back up the walkway. He hadn’t felt this excited in weeks.

“I’m so happy for you!” His mother was almost squealing with her own excitement. “Oh, this is going to be so good for you, I know you’re going to love it. Read too while you’re there, okay? You used to love reading so much.” She cooed.

“I will, mom.”

The next morning, Changkyun tossed himself awake reacting to the loud screams of fire alarms, again. He lifted himself out of bed, covered in sweat, looking around for any sign of the blaze. Nothing.   “Dammit.” He sighed to himself.   He wasn’t sure how long the nightmares would last, but at least today they woke him in time to get ready for his first day at work. He showered then ran downstairs after getting dressed to find his mother standing near the dinner table. She had a cup of coffee for him and the biggest smile he’s ever seen her wear. He walked over and embraced her tight.   She rubbed his back and said, “this is going to be good for you, like I said. A new fresh start. You’re such a strong person Changkyun, I know you’ll get where you need to be. And I’m always here for you. Remember this.”  

He thanked her and headed out towards the shop.   Walking in he saw the man at the counter from yesterday, greeting him with a warm smile.  

“I didn’t get a chance to introduce myself since you ran out so fast yesterday. I’m Jooheon.”   Jooheon held his hand out to formally greet Changkyun.  

“Right, sorry about that. I’m Changkyun.” He returned the gesture. “It’s nice to meet you!”  

Jooheon giggled. “You don’t have to be super formal here, we’re all like a family anyway. So, to kick things off let me run down what you’ll be doing.”  

Jooheon walked Changkyun around the sales floor, front counter, then the back room telling him how to use the register and check inventory.  

“Customers can order books through us too if we don’t have exactly what they’re looking for in stock.” Jooheon explained while showing him the public kiosk set up for people to use freely on the sales floor.   “So”, Jooheon turned to face Changkyun, “since I’m finished with the basics why don’t you tell me a little about yourself? I can only eavesdrop so much, you know.”

Changkyun thought for a second before answering. “There’s not much to tell, truthfully.” He shrugged. “I’m just pretty much looking to find myself. Like, who I am and what I want essentially. I figured this would be something new and relaxing for me.”

“Bad breakup?” Jooheon interjected.

“W-what?” Changkyun felt embarrassed.

“Shownu mentioned it, but I won’t bring it up if it’s still sensitive. So don’t sweat over it.”  

“Heh, I’m sure I’ll talk about it soon, it’s only just been about a month anyway – probably less. I’m trying not to keep track.” Changkyun rubbed his hand across the back of his neck, trying to show he was uncomfortable without really saying it.

“Relax, man. You’re going to like it here just fine.”  

A man walked up to them as they stood at the counter talking. Jooheon greeted him first, likely demonstrating what was expected of Changkyun.  

“What can we help you with?” Jooheon flashed that brilliant smile of his.

“Mmm, well…” The man was shorter than the both of them and looked rather timid while he gathered his thoughts. Though, Changkyun caught himself thinking only about how adorable he is. He had black strands of hair cascade down his forehead in protest against the gel that was supposed to hold it back and wore ripped jeans with a tight fitted t-shirt around his small body. “I was wondering if either of you had any good recommendations? I’m usually a pretty avid reader but I love seeing what other people pick up so I can try it too.”  

Changkyun realized that Jooheon was staring at him, waiting for him to take this opportunity for himself. Surely for the job experience only.  

“I… um… well…” The man stared intently at Changkyun, waiting for his answer. Changkyun released the air he held captive in his lungs as a deep sigh. “I actually haven’t been able to read much lately… and I just started here so I’m sorry that I can’t be of much help.”  

The man began to quietly giggle. “I appreciate the honesty, darling.” He beamed up at Changkyun.   “How about…” he pulled a pen and paper from his bag, “you get a recommendation from me, instead, and the next time I see you we can talk about it.”   He smiled big as he handed over the paper, offered a quick wave, then turned and almost bounced his way out the door. Changkyun felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to find Jooheon very amused.  

“You know you cant fall in love with every customer that comes in right? You might want to calm down a bit before someone thinks you were sitting in the sun too long. Your face is so red!” He teased and Changkyun hid his face behind his hand and with the other passed the paper to Jooheon.

“Do we have this in stock?”  

Jooheon busted out laughing “I don’t know if we have a book titled 'Kihyun’ with a kissy face, or maybe that’s the author? Oh but see here… the other line, that must be the book title we can look up. Just another thing I can show you, come on.”

Another week had passed since Changkyun first started at Blue Moon Books. He and Jooheon were becoming close friends quickly and he had learned a lot from him about different novels that had become popular over the past couple of years. He felt he missed out on so much. Though the one book he was most invested in was the one recommended to him by the man he met his first day there. Changkyun had finished reading it and was waiting around to see him walk through the front door so they could talk about it, but each day came and went without seeing his face.  

“He’ll come in eventually man, it’s only been a week anyway. That’s not the first time I’ve seen him come in.” Jooheon gave Changkyun a rough pat on the back “Besides, with the way you’re so worked up over it this is probably good for you anyway. Didn’t you just come out of a long term relationship?”  

“Yeah…”, Changkyun sighed, “you’re right, and…. I don’t know I guess I’m just a little lonely is all. Three years is a long time with someone. Not to mention I haven’t even thought of the possibility of being with someone new? And he’s just so cute I….”  

“How did that end anyway? If… you don’t mind me asking.” Jooheon was a bit uneasy asking this question. He knew it could be sensitive.

Changkyun gave in, though, and told him everything about y/n that had happened in those last two days they were together.   “And I’m not sure if I have the right to be angry you know? A big part of me is, but I have no one to blame but myself anyway.”  

Jooheon stood where he was and held his concerned expression for a while, thinking, before finally speaking.   “Dude, you do realize this person was using you, right?”  

“Huh? What are you talking about?” Changkyun certainly wasn’t expecting those words from him.

“You were in an emotionally manipulative relationship with them. They used you for everything. Tell me, didn’t you say when you first got here that you were trying to find yourself? Why do you that is, exactly?”

“I mean I…”, Changkyun hadn’t thought of the reason, honestly. He just knew he wasn’t himself. “I had to care for them you know? And… in doing that I kind of lost sight of who I was or what I wanted.” Yeah, that sounded about right. “That’s just natural though, I did what I needed to-”  

“Changkyun, come on man. That’s not normal. Y/n is an adult, and they should be able to handle themselves and their own life. Listen, the cooling unit is a thing that happens, not someone asking you to take the responsibility for their every mishap or emotion for three whole years. That a lot of shit to carry on your shoulders.”  

Changkyun was silent, unsure of what to say exactly. He was starting to think that maybe Jooheon was right, and that he did deserve better than what happened between them. But then he wondered how you un-do three years of all that combined.  

Jooheon could tell he was troubled.   “I didn’t mean to make you feel negatively at all, nothing you did was wrong and you didn’t deserve what happened. I hope you know that… I want you to know that. You’re a good person, Changkyun. Karma will do wonders, just watch.”  

Changkyun offered a small smile.   “Thank you Jooheon”  

“Don’t sweat it, let’s get back to work and get our mind off this, yeah?”  

Changkyun went about his day organizing shelves, doing inventory for a new books, and selling merchandise. They were getting close to locking the doors when one last customer ran up.  

“I’ll be quick, I promise!” Jooheon let them inside and then ran over to Changkyun.

“Um, you’ll want to be ready at the counter for this.” He was smiling big… too big.

“What?”

“Just go!” Jooheon pushed him towards the register. Changkyun watched as the customer darted inbetween shelf after shelf, like they had been here a hundred times. They gently pulled each selection from their place, giving them a once over before finally picking two and walking briskly towards the counter where Jooheon and Changkyun stood waiting. Changkyun then recognized him as he approached. Kihyun.

“Oh! I’ve been waiting for you to come back around! I finished that book you recommended.”  

“Oh, yeah?” A flash of red crept in his cheeks and he broke eye contact. “You know I realized how dumb I was for not even giving you my name before. I’m Kihyun.” He was half looking to the side, half looking at Changkyun’s chin. He wondered why Kihyun seemed embarrassed.

“Ah”, Changkyun rubbed the back of his neck nervously, “yeah, I saw on your note actually. I’m Changkyun.”  

Kihyun slid the books he picked onto the counter and took a breath. “Um, would you like to hang out with me sometime? We can… talk about that book.” His face was even more red now, changing hue by the minute it seemed.   Changkyun, frozen with the product scanner in his hand, was shocked at the sudden invitation. He felt Jooheon lightly pinch his arm in encouragement.  

“Yeah, that sounds great actually. I know of this arcade in town we can go to, if you’d be interested in something like that?”  

“Are you kidding?!” Kihyun seemed excited at the suggestion. “I love arcades! I didn’t even know there was one in town. Are you free tomorrow?”   He was practically bouncing on the soles of his feet awaiting Changkyun’s response.  

“He is!” Jooheon answered for him, but Changkyun was confused. He wasn’t free tomorrow, he had to work.  

“Great! We can meet up around noon then. How much do I owe you guys?” He stood waiting, wallet in hand, and the most lovely smile painted on his mouth.

Changkyun cleared his throat. He was trying so hard not to feel awkward, but he couldn’t help it.   “It’s fifteen seventy-nine.”  

Kihyun paid for his new books and handed Changkyun a slip of paper. “Feel free to text me whenever. See you tomorrow!”  

The moment the door closed behind Kihyun, Jooheon turned to place his hands on Changkyun’s shoulders.   “Dude, relax. You two are just hanging out, and I’m gonna cover your shift. Besides, you’ve been working every single day so you could use a good break."

"You’re right.” Changkyun exhaled. “Thanks, man.”

“Just because you think he’s cute doesn’t mean you have to add pressure to this, you know.”   Jooheon walked to the backroom laughing before Changkyun, mouth agape, could protest.  

That night back home, before going to bed Changkyun decided he would try and text Kihyun to start conversation and hopefully make himself feel less anxious about them hanging out tomorrow. He sat on the edge of his bed writing, deleting, and then rewriting text after text before finally gathering the courage to send him something. Just before hitting send Changkyun’s phone began to vibrate as it received a call.   He hadn’t recognized the number at first, but after answering and hearing the voice on the other line his heart dropped into his gut.  

“Changkyunniieee!” Y/n was basically purring his name on the other end.  

He didn’t answer right away.   “Did you miss me? Hmm? I-I miss-d you by like… just a lil bit ya know.” “Y/n are you drunk right now? What do you want.”   His shock transgressed into a slow burning infuriation.  

“I dunno I just wan-ne-ted to hear your voice, maybe? And no! Sill-by, I only drank a lil cup. I’m fiiinne. You’re acting like we barely know-”  

“You told me to leave you alone, and I respected your wishes. So this is me, asking you to respect mine and return the favor.”   Changkyun hung up and tried to recollect himself. Where in the hell did they get off thinking they could just call like that? He looked back down to his phone to see three new messages.  

The first two:   -UNKNOWN (11:28 PM): YOU THIBNK YOU CANA JUST HANG UP ON ME HWEN IM SPEAKING TO YOU?? FUCK YOU -UNKNOWN (11:34 PM): ok im sorry haha im jst kidding call me  

“Ugh.” Changkyun was hoping this wouldn’t begin to be a thing, and would remain a one-time occurrence.   Then he checked the third message:   -KIHYUN (11:07 PM): Hey!~ I’m looking forward to our hang out tomorrow. Be ready to bring your competition on! >:D  

That text alone removed the bitter feeling from his heart. He was moving on.

Changkyun arrived at the arcade far too early. It was just now eleven when they had agreed to meet around noon. Yet, here he was, eagerly waiting for Kihyun to show. Not too long after he had made it there, his phone began to ring. As he looked down to see the caller ID it lit up as the number y/n had called him from the previous night. Against his better judgement, he answered.

“Hello.”

“Oh! Changkyun! Thank god, listen… you’ve got to help me.” Y/n sounded panicked and was breathing heavy.

“With?” He couldn’t believe this.

“My boyfriend he uh… kicked me out. I have nowhere to go.” They seemed to be on the verge of tears, or at least that’s what the acting came off as.

“And how is that my problem.” He forced a stern tone in his voice, he wasn’t interested in helping them whatsoever.

“Well, that’s rude… but, we got into a fight and he told me to get out. Long story short. So I went out for a few drinks until he calmed down but when I came back the door was locked.”

“Wait, wait. Where were you staying?” The other end stayed silent. “Y/n!” He tried pushing.

“Uh-I… our apartment?”

“Are you serious right now? This is some major irony, isn’t it?” Changkyun was kicked from his own apartment from the person who decided to end their relationship, and now the same was happening to them. Jooheon was definitely right about karma, and it came bearing teeth.

“Changkyun you’re being really mean.” He could almost hear that stupid pout through the whining. “I need help and you’re just going to critici-”

“You’re damn right I’m going to criticize you. You think that you’d just call me up, so sure that I’m still wrapped around your fucking finger and that I’ll just drop everything that I’m doing just to coddle you. Well, you ensured that will never happen again, and I gotta say y/n… I thank you for it.”

“What are you even fucking talking about?”  

“Ah, there’s the snake.” Changkyun looked up to see Kihyun waving and towards him. “I’ve got to go. Don’t call me again, and find someone else to leech off of. It sounds like your new toy isn’t so easily swayed anyway. Good luck.”   He turned his phone off and shoved it inside of his pocket. Changkyun felt immensely proud of himself in this moment. He did something he never in a million year dreamed that he would, and he had never felt more free.

“What are you all smiley about, huh?” Kihyun pushed Changkyun’s arm in a playful manner.

“Just… I dropped something from my life and I feel a lot better. Let’s go inside?”

“Oh! Yes please!”

They stepped inside and Kihyun began to marvel at everything he saw. “Oh, my god! It’s video game heaven!”

“Well, that is kinda the point.” Changkyun teased.

“Tsk, I told you that I’ve never been here before. Let my inner child have a sugar rush, will you?” Kihyun giggled and picked out games for them to play together. Changkyun felt they were there for days with how much fun he was having. Kihyun demolished him at racing games, but Changkyun had the upper hand with shooters. He felt as if the world, including the past and future, melted away. It was only him and Kihyun genuinely enjoying each other and having fun. Nothing else mattered, and that’s when Changkyun thought to himself that nothing else would. “Kihyun?” His stomach knotted up into ways he didn’t think were possible.

“Yes?”

“Thank you for today.”

“Oh, you’re welcome! But… what do you mean, what for?” He was beaming from ear to hear. His smile lit up his whole face. Curious, but happy still.

“It’s just..” Changkyun stammered, “I don’t feel any pressure being around you. Like… I’m not walking on egg shells, you know? I just… thank you.” He was having a hard time maintaining eye contact. There was something he had to get off his chest.

For a moment Kihyun was confused, but slowly seemed to gather Changkyun’s meaning and let it go. “Like I said dear, you’re very welcome. I’m having a lot of fun too!” They stood in awkawrd silence for a short while before Kihyun pressed. “Shall we play more, or…?”

Changkyun exhaled hard, and took a step towards Kihyun.   “Kihyun can I…” He couldn’t bring himself to look up, but he heard Kihyun grant him a small giggle.

“Why are you acting so silly?”

“Can I kiss you?” He felt like he had been punched in the gut, but for some reason it was more satisfying than painful.

“I…”   Changkyun finally looked up to find Kihyun with a surprisingly relaxed expression, searching for something to say. As he gave a slow nod time stopped for Changkyun. He gently reached forward and cupped Kihyun’s cheek in his palm, then drew him close to kiss him deep. He felt Kihyun’s little fingers tighten around his biceps as if to brace himself, and his lips were outrageously soft. They tasted of strawberries and that was something Changkyun knew he would never forget. Kissing Kihyun felt just right, like they were designed for each other. Then, Kihyun pulled away.  

“I just… I had to know.” Changkyun confessed. “I felt something and… I don’t know, kissing you sounded like a way to solidify that.” He nervously rubbed his arm, unsure of what Kihyun was feeling.

“Changkyun I…” He looked conflicted, like he held his own secret. The tiny child in him that was just running around the arcade, hiding.

“If… if this is to become something… more…” He was having a tough time searching for the words again it seemed. He had hoped that Kihyun knew he could trust him. He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Changkyun I wasn’t born… how you see me now. I need to know you’re comfortable with who I am. I was… born a female, not as me. Not as… Kihyun.”

Changkyun’s heart swelled. “You’re Kihyun to me. You are who you say you are, and to me? You are Kihyun, the boy I met a week ago that has made me develop the biggest, most horrendous crush on.”

Kihyun couldn’t help but laugh.  

“And I’m scared as hell but… I want to know all of you. I mean you.”

Kihyun shoved himself into Changkyun’s embrace then.

“We’ll both grow into ourselves. You can learn to trust me, and I can do the same for you.” He lifted his chin up and placed small, wet kisses along Changkyun’s jaw line. Standing on the tips of his toes Kihyun whispered into Changkyun’s ear, “We learned how to save ourselves.”