#yes i have heard of undertale. ive been here for way too long
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there is a lack of adventure games that don't depend on combat, i don't want to kill the creatures... let them live...
#peace and love on planet earth or smth smth escapism i hate combat#the most i can do is zelda botw type of thing but i still don't like fighting the creatures it makes me anxious#even stardew has combat????? i dont want that#acnh got stale so the only games ive been playing after that have been monkey island and mario kart#and i want cool graphics too imagine a big budget zelda type adventure game where you didn't have to KILL KILL KILL all the time#chat tag#games#baby games but for adults and also big budget and nice graphics#yes i have heard of undertale. ive been here for way too long
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THREE YEARS OF TOCK TUTTI POSTING..... every year i can never describe how much this little lalafell means to me and the joy and wonder she's brought to my life as if i didnt make her purely because i wanted to be a miqote but didnt find any pretty and just slapped together a lalafell and gave her a goofy name.
Tock is so much more in my brain now because my ocs are like my children but also people who appear before me and have their own thoughts and feelings that I get to walk their path with and above all my ocs i think tock tutti has to be my favorite. she is my special girl. she is everything to me. ive been posting about ff14 for 3 years straight now and i dont see that slowing down for at least another 3 years. as long as tock wants to walk forward and see another day i'll walk with her and see her on her way. The world revolves around her in my mind.
I can get sappy here and i know its #justagame and you all heard me hee haw about how much i both absolutely despise ff14 and its fans yet also love it and its fans dearly. how i got to get closer to my best friend through it and be put through the ringer by complete strangers in it. Get mocked and laughed at in it and sat quietly and watched the stars in it with people. I dont like talking about the intricacies of my personal/irl life and even when i talk a lot about myself i dont really try to reveal information about how im living or how i see my future but no matter what goes on out there the fact that i have a little creation of my own i can come to and dress her up or send her on an adventure or go farm with has gotten me through a lot of really dark places and moments in my life that dont even compare to the utter horrors i experienced as a teenager. and I didnt have anything like tock tutti or this game in that time and so had to deal with a lot of that terror and pain by myself with nothing to distract me or help me through it, and its #justagame but its a very important one to me. endwalker especially. I have a deep and unending love for meteion and hermes and getting to meet them and I think even when im old and wrinkly theyre going to sit in my heart as something important to me even then. And tock will too, even when the day comes where I have to let her go and can no longer walk with her.
as that one comment on the youtube upload of dynamis puts it, this game is just really special to me. and I'm glad to have been put on it by my best friend. and I hope for all my bitching and complaining everyone can still see how much it has influenced my art and my creative endevears and can see the love I feel for the characters, the community, and so on. I don't really interact with the community due to a distaste for fandom from some really awful experiences back in the ye old undertale days, so i appreciate the people who follow me and my art and are very kind to me in this community even if i dont follow back/talk to you. I hope I can keep making art you enjoy and that you can see how happy i am here, and above all else to see that tock tutti is a special little oc of mine that I want to share with you all, and I hope you come to love her just as I do. My little sweet pea my melon head my singer of light
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Thinking about how the lovely person on deviantart who emailed me a copy of Undertale in exchange for a sketch of their oc when I was 15 will never know about the profound effect they had on my life..
#it’s a long story but tldr if not for Undertale I would’ve never heard of Yes Man and without Yes Man I literally wouldn’t be alive rn#I’m sure ive told this story on here before but I like it bc it is important to me#the Undertale to Yes Man pipeline is a very specific thing that happened to me involving 2 different joke blogs on here#there was ‘youcantfuckaskeleton’ (blog abt how nobody should want sans Undertale carnally)#and then I found their other blog ‘youcanfuckarobot’ (blog about. well. I’m sure you get the picture) and I went there for Mettaton posts#but they had some posts there with Yes Man and I was like. that is the most nice looking robot I’ve seen in my life. who is this#and then I forgot abt it for like 3 years and forgot to look him up. UNTIL#DELTARUNE CHAPTER 1.. in 2018.. drove me to revisit those joke blogs for nostalgia#and I saw the yes man pics again and this time I got WAY more curious. I was so so intrigued by him he looked so interesting and cute#so I looked him up and looked at lots of art of him and read his wiki page and I was like. I NEED to meet him#so my big brother got me new vegas as a present on new years and on january 3 2019 I met yes man!#and. I have never understood why or how. but when I woke up the next day my depression was fucking gone#I had severe untreated depression and it just dissolved overnight#nothing else notable happened around that time except for meeting yes man and becoming smitten with him so it seems that’s what did it??#also those joke blogs are still around I think. i like to revisit them occasionally for the nostalgia of seeing yes man for the first time#but yea anyway what I’m saying is this nice person on deviantart indirectly saved my life#my depression also never came back btw. obviously I feel sad sometimes like anyone but I have not been depressed since then#would’ve been nice if my anxiety went away too but I can at least live with that tbh!!#um anyway I’m sleepy so ending these tags. if you read all of this I love you thank you for caring
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session 92 end (bye 413...)
this session was so long but so fucking hectic what the fuck
im going to try and slim it down to its bare essentials rather than go on a full rant because im pretty sure i want to make a post later on about vriska’s characterisation (not anything about me liking her/disliking her, just an analyse on her life really, so it wont be too bias because thats not the point of an analysis. i also want to do one on aradia, been meaning to for a while... hmm... damn i havent done much analogies lately, and i THINK the last long post on a character i made was about davesprite??? so its been a fucking while. that being said, ill leave a lot of details out for this end of session notes so i dont just repeat myself later on. rather will keep to plot points here and then make character points in another)
alright
first we had a page or two where aradia confided in nepeta about her being dead which means nepeta is the only one to know this revelation. im pretty sure aradia confided because there was no other way around it, since nepeta was her server player, so it was inevitable. either way, aradia still put her trust in nep, which means, if you think about it, nobody else knows and nobody else ever will. and considering aradia asked nep to keep it a secret, it probably wont get explored by others until MAYBE later on, whenever its plot relevant, so everyone will be in the dark about it for a while which ill have to remember for future dialogue and scenes with aradia in them
then we met vriska
which, yes, is a meme. i may not have been on a lot of fandom platforms, but you cant escape some of the stuff that goes around the internet. even if you dont know undertale, im pretty sure you know of sans. or komaeda if you have/havent seen danganronpa. its just.. the memes, ya know? ive heard from many sources of the “vriska did nothing wrong” quote (even through mbmbam which??? WHAT) but since i didnt even know what it meant, i never explored it so then i never knew it was a homestuck thing. imagine my surprise...... i think even at the time, i wouldnt have known what homestuck was either honestly so it wouldnt even matter. i only recently learned about the fandom.... uhh, maybe half a year ago??? yeah, august, so my knowledge was slim but vriska is a thing ive heard before, which still shocks me
goddammit
anyways back to her
so her intro was something, we pretty much found out she likes DnD (a FANATIC in fact) and feeds her lusus the flesh of living trolls. which is fucked up. but i wont get too much into detail about that until i make a post about her life on alternia and the consequences of such. or maybe just alternia in general...?? or *both* heheheh but i feel i need more information before i go off on a tangent about that
then we met??? white text dude?? who is a major asshole but an asshole with insults that hURted, to think i felt bad for VRISKA when that happened. woah.
i said before, but... karkat, he cant really hit deep because his insults are just HIM and his way to express himself. like some people find it natural to just go “FUCK YOU” to show emphasis on a point, and thats just karkats way. he may do it so aggressively that it takes you a second to realize what he said, but usually i dont take anything to heart whenever he spurts out some insults. ive progressed to the point where whatever he says, is just “karkat” and not him trying to be actively mean. rather, its now funny whenever he does say anything SOMEWHAT creative, dude has an imagination that goes on for miles
but vriska?? she IS trying to be a bully, you can tell. but i feel theres something much more to that. like shes trying to prove herself and her “blueblooded” demeanours or whatever the hierarchy is. she doesnt want to show emotions so she makes herself a barrier by being mean is what i can gather from her conversation with kanaya. im pretty sure youre not supposed to understand her until its pointed out and rather see her as an “antagonist” at first, but yeah, her insults are more pitiful than anything and i also cant take her too seriously. i may not like her as a person but her character is interesting because you cant always have the goodie two shoes as the protags. it doesnt diversify the characterisation so i like vriska as someone who makes the plot work and it becomes more interesting since you have someone that makes it harder for the main crew to progress. a happy-go-lucky adventure with no trouble and no turnabouts would be boring in a way. so having a character like vriska, or like this new white text guy, it makes you stop for a second and realize oh shit okay, here’s where shit CAN go wrong and WHY. and i do especially like it when these bastards of characters somehow have more depth than being the “bastard characters”. kinda humanizes them in a way. doesnt mean you have to LIKE them continuously, but theyre humans (trolls whatever) in the end and every person has their own story whether its for better or for worse
for example, i like her being placed into the story, along with white text, by how its all leading to this “accident” and is slowly showing us hints on what happened, but in the end, it wont be until later that we know the full story. even if it was in the past, it apparently is very vital to the plot and shapes how the characters act in the future, so important aspects like that are to look out for. and usually they only occur when theres been some trouble within friend dynamics. so without these bastard of characters, plot wouldnt grow AS strong and i often keep that in mind when i explore a story.
anyways, I HAD A POINT TO THIS: so vriska and karkat are characters who are yes, mean, but it seems to be their personality, and the way they either show emotions and convey feelings (karkat) or make a barrier so they DONT show emotions to produce vulnerability (vriska), white text guy seems to mostly be out to be an asshole. he told vriska she was useless to sum it up but im not too sure if this is one of those “first dialogue” to mould out a bias opinion before we even get to the character themselves, but judging by how vriska and karkat played out, he surely means something bad and i dont know how to explain it. but i cannot base anything off from one piece of dialogue. i dont even know what else to call him other than white text guy so...... ill just leave that out for now, until we finally get his introduction
though, i do wish to mention, and will expand on, im not wrong when i say karkat and vriska are similar but in different context. sorry if youre favourite is karkat and you dont like vriska, or vice versa, but uhhhh their introductions are so similar its uncanny and the way they’re portrayed is the same except one is more on crack about the meddling, while the other is angry about the meddling. similar to how it was with karkat, we were introduced to vriska talking with someone we knew (tavros) whom she obviously didnt like, so obviously, from her point of view, she wanted to be menacing. like how karkat was menacing to jade because she wouldnt listen to his point... he got angry, so he lashed out. but us, the readers, didnt know that. we thought “oh god its this asshole” until we made it further in the story and started to warm up to karkat. it may not be the same with vriska, she may be a bully regardless, but you cannot tell me we moulded a bias towards her character as we did when we first read karkat. theyre both truly mean to other people, maybe both for different reasons, but i do want to point out the similarities and not leave that out. im pretty sure andrew basically gave us a conversation that formed our opinion of a character right off the bat rather than go into depth of WHY they did it, and how they are naturally without the conditions of the game. which, you can also see with vriska when she conversed with kanaya. andrew started off with a character who only appears to speak once, and makes you judge them from first appearance alone, without any explanation as to why they said what they said and how they are with other characters, let says. so you assume they were simply a rude character. now look how karkat turned out. so im guessing in homestuck, the first impression should never be the opinion you stick with until MAYBE 5 more conversations with that character (each one different)
OKAY done with the vriska introduction, now to slutquius
yes, hes kinda weird, i have stated that many times. i have no idea what to say about him other than he likes porn, he likes centaur dick which just so happens to be his lusus as well and if that isnt a red flag idk what is
he also likes his lusus milk, right from the udders of his guardian
fun times, fun times
my opinion of equius kinda.. differs. which i should really put in place the “dont judge by first impression” rule, because at first i thought he was rude with, then i thought he was hhh okay, because i understood why he was being so protective over nepeta and her team placement, since the people she was going to play with WERE dangerous. but if you think about it, both sides will probably put you in danger. it just depends on which ones you confide in more to protect your back rather than those which would cause trouble on purpose, in my HONEST opinion. so equius was a little overdramatic on that part, but i got what he meant. he was on the blue team and he didnt want to leave nepeta alone without him on the red. but then this session happened. and he went back to being weird again because of the whole porn thing, especially being so open about it like dude chill youre 13. but the thing is, then i felt bad for him because hes basically touch starved. to say that he could break anything he touches, i doubt people would go up to him for hugs. in fear they would be crushed to death by a simple hug. so im guessing hes rather lonely and doesnt really know how to interact because of this. so i felt sad that he had to live a life where he needs to be careful of everything he touches so it doesnt break randomly. see? poor dude. but then things got weird. and im pretty sure hes a masochist. so my opinion on equius is a fucking cosine graph
which brings us to the final point:
gamzee and equius’ conversation
i dont even know.....like.........gamzee was unaware that equius was using him for his own power play roleplay, right? gamzee knew it was a roleplay but it had had some.. idk.... obvious sexual implications? and i bet gamzee didnt really know that? he thought they were only venting out through a simple roleplay and trying to get closer because he originally thought equius hated him, considering equius flat out said “i hate you” and gamzee went “you tell me everyday and im okay with that” so.. gamzee probably wanted only to get closer to equius so he helped out his little problem which.. thats so sweet but i feel bad he was coerced into something he didnt get, especially since he was innocent enough to go along without knowing equius’ true gain
anyways, equius was getting off with the hierarchy thing. considering he’s “lower” than gamzee, and gamzee is surprisingly ...high on the spectrum??? so equius wanted gamzee to boss him around, because it felt only natural to him since he’s the “inferior one” and gamzee is The Big Man. like i get that, but it was written in a way that was so uncomfortable, that i wish i didnt. equius is just a weird character... hes not BAD per say, but hes... hes something alright
but im really liking gamzee. the two things which struck me in that one conversation, was the “i dont get why we should dictate people by the colour of their blood, i just see people as people” piece of dialogue and “i cant go around pleasing just everything so its alright if you hate me”
thats... so good, idk. i really liked that. i also really liked when kanaya said “youre dangerous but dangerous people are needed and are important because it shapes you” like <33 my fucking heart
god homestuck may be a tad on the weird side with some of its characters but it surely knows how to create great lines of dialogue
and that concludes the long 4 hour session i did, hope you all enjoyed it
with that, i rest
#homestuck#homestuck liveblog#hs92#hs92 end#i wrote more than i should have but i had a lot to say#just you wait for those analogy/analysis posts
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