#yes i commented about it and yes the artist played dumb i'm just so..

[bookishjules]

idk who needs to hear this today. but don't use other people's art in your art without permission. and especially not without credit. and especially especially do not let people comment on the piece of the art that you didn't make and let them believe it belongs to anyone but the original artist.

[isaac--r]

So, here are my thoughts on my little meow meows from the dlc (yes, I'm talking about the owls):

The first word that comes to my mind is ''victims''. These people are victims of the Eye, and of the game itself; the first one is easily explained by that one slide reel, which really broke my heart, in which one of those owls scans the Eye and then falls to the ground in horror after getting a nightmarish vision of what's to come. Just the expression on their face, man. I know I'm still pretty early in the dlc, but so far they present as people who just wanted to protect themselves, or take (very understandable) revenge. I'd say the former.

The second point sounds a bit strange, but it's the best way I can put it: they are "victims" of the game (this is not me saying the game did a bad thing, I think it's brilliant actually), in the sense that everything is made to give them a bad rep. The game itself warns you about being scary, and it's obvious that they're the ones you should fear, gigantic deer-owls with glowing eyes, intruding in our solar system with an eerie invisible ship filled with some dark and frightening mysteries.

But I find them sympathetic in every possible way. First, let's look at their stuff. Second only to Timber Hearth, the Stranger is the most welcoming place in the game. The only danger comes from the structures breaking; as a place itself, it's harmless (unless you're dumb enough to swim in rapids). It's way more friendly than Brittle Hollow and its horrifying annoying black hole, or the Ember Twin, which has the worst death in the game. Now, I'm not blaming this on the Nomai, they did what they could with what they had. But the owl people put a lot of effort into making their spaceship a perfect replica of nature, and they're the only ones to do that in the game. As for the contents and structures of the ship, you'll see a lot of personality - and art - there. Decorated houses, rugs and carpets with pretty geometrical patterns, custom furniture, and gorgeous paintings, not to mention the little stylized stuff, like the sun-shaped rotating plates on the doors. Then there's the decorations in the houses, and now we get to look at the owls as people. Their houses have individual and family portraits in them, which shows that they treasure family bonds, and in the slide reels, you can see that they are a pretty tight-knit community (barring that one portrait which is vandalized, which I'm sure will be relevant soon). You see them working together, sharing discoveries, and in that one very sad scene, comforting each other. To me, they are like the Nomai; an alien species of engineers/artists, who have a penchant for discovery, families, bonds, and an interest in the Eye. Oh, and a bunch of corpses lying around too.

But, unlike the nomai, they are presented as scary. Which definitely works, I am personally playing with a heart rate of 500 bpms, but they are only scary according to our horror clichés (and fear of the dark), and if you forget what they are: owls. Of course their eyes glow in the dark, they're owls. Of course it's dark as hell in their world, they're owls, nocturnal people. (I won't comment on the corpse-rooms yet because I'm not that far in the game.) And yeah, green fire is eerie, but all of their light-based tech is green. And having finally gotten the first jumpscare, I'll say... they're chill. Sure, it was terrifying, and for a second there I thought that bird was getting some slow-mo momentum to go for my fucking throat carnivorous style, but all they did was take a huge breath to... blow out my light. That's it. They just kicked me out of there.

So most of the things we find scary about them can just be explained by "they just live in the dark, man". They're just chill birds, who got betrayed by the one thing they worshipped, and are doing... something about it, not sure what yet. Sure, they're stupid huge and their eyes glow, but that's no reason to assume the worst in them. Or even fear them.

I'll wait till the sun comes back up to play though.

[theycallme-thejackal]

Hello dear jackal! I’ve got a prompt. Could you write one where Midge bumps into Declan Howell and she uses him to make Lenny jealous?

Pairing: Lenny Bruce & Midge Maisel Rated T Warnings: 5x01 Spoilers

Midge isn't one to intentionally toy with someone else's emotions, but there's a certain poetic justice to both Declan Howell and Lenny Bruce being in this particular bar on the same night.

She honestly can't deny there is a certain...attraction to the tortured artist sitting on the stool in front of her. She knows that if she asked him to take her to bed, he would. Immediately. And it would probably be great.

But the problem is that she's so fucking in love with Lenny that she can't imagine leaving this bar with anyone else.

Declan watches her as her eyes fall on the comic across the room, and then he turns to look. A dark chuckle passes his lips. "Lenny Bruce, eh?"

Midge nods, playing dumb. "Yes, that's Lenny Bruce," she replies, taking a sip of her martini and returning her gaze to the man before her. "You know him?"

He shrugs. "We run in...adjacent circles. Sometimes they meet."

"Ah," she breathes. "So you know him, but you don't know him."

"Precisely," Declan replies as he studies her. Part of her wonders if he's about to take out a pencil and start sketching on a napkin. Or maybe he has some paints and will begin using her face as a canvas.

Instead he chuckles softly. "You're in love with him, aren't you?"

She denies it, but she took half a beat too long to do so. Declan dips his head disbelievingly. "So I suppose I will once again fail in attempting to convince you to come to bed with me."

Her gaze unintentionally flicks toward Lenny, just barely catching his eyes before he looks away, and Declan gives her a sad little smile. "In another life, perhaps," he comments as he stands. He kisses her cheek softly before stumbling further down the bar to get another drink.

She watches him go and then looks back at Lenny, nursing his bourbon and avoiding looking at her. She steels herself and makes her way to his table, leaning on the empty chair beside him. "Got tired of avoiding me?" She asks, cocking her head.

He looks up at her. "Who says I was avoiding you?"

Midge lifts her brows and shrugs as she pulls out the chair to sit. "The distinct lack of sneak attacks in recent months was a hint," she answers as she crosses her legs.

"Where'd Howell go?" He asks, not bothering to look away from her.

"Somewhere down the bar," she answers with a wave of her hand.

"You'll catch up with him later then?"

Midge rolls her eyes. "Maybe my parents were right," she says.

That confuses him, and his brows furrow intensely. "What?"

"Maybe you are an idiot off stage."

He gives her a little chuckle. "I can confirm that is absolutely true."

"I'm not with Declan Howell," she explains. "Just...an acquaintance."

"You looked awfully cozy up there."

She rolls her eyes again. "For fuck's sake, Lenny, you're the one who left town. And tried not to say goodbye, I might add."

"So?" He mutters petulantly.

"So you don't get to be jealous when I talk to other men," she snaps, moving back to her feet.

"I didn't - " He huffs a sigh as she pauses halfway out of her chair, and she sits back down. He takes a long drag from his cigarette. "I didn't leave to get away from you," he murmurs. "I just...needed to get away from New York. Go be with my kid. Get away from the cops."

"No cops in Los Angeles?"

"There are, but they like me better."

"Lenny..."

He cocks his head at her. "Midge..."

"I'm going to ask you something, and I need you to answer honestly. No jokes, no deflecting, just...honesty." He nods slowly. "Are we ever going to get our shit together, or is this just...passing?"

There's only about an inch of space between their hands, and his fingertips brush against hers almost absently. "I...it's too late for me, Midge," he mutters. "I'm not...I'm not the man you're looking for."

"Bullshit."

"I'm not good enough for you, Midge!"

She looks at him for a long moment before sighing, "And you said I put you on a pedestal." He taps the ash from the end of his cigarette without saying anything. "So your answer is no, then. We're never going to get our shit together. It's going to be just one fucking incredible night - when you told me you loved me, by the way - and then...nothing."

His face flushes a little at that, and he ducks his head, muttering, "You weren't supposed to hear that."

"Well, I did. You want to take it back?" She asks primly.

His lips quirk in a similar way that they did that night at Dublin House - so similarly, in fact, that she half expects him to say you are lovely. "I don't want to take it back," he admits quietly.

"Good. Because I love you, too, you putz."

A soft breath of a chuckle passes his lips, and he shakes his head. "Midge, you're killing me," he groans, half joking.

"Would you rather I try a different tack? I can go find Declan." She jerks her thumb over her shoulder.

She has now intention of going home with Declan Howell. Even if Lenny pushes her away again, she's just...not interested in being with someone else. But her joke has him glowering, his eyes practically flashing green with jealousy, and she drops her hand again, letting it rest on top of his this time. "Let's try," she pleads. "Because I think...I think this could be it, Lenny."

His eyes grow teary in a similar way they did in that airport walkway six months ago. "Midge - "

Before he has the opportunity to protest further, she presses her lips desperately to his. Please, please stay with me.

He kisses her back almost immediately. Dropping the cigarette in favor of cupping her neck, he pulls her closer to him with such surprising strength that she tumbles from her own chair and into his lap.

The change in position in this rather busy bar has them both laughing quietly until it makes kissing near impossible. He buries his face in the crook of her neck and holds her body tightly against his as she tenderly strokes his hair. "I love you, Lenny," she whispers again. "I should have said it at the airport before you left. Or in your hotel room that night."

He doesn't let go or lift his head. He just inhales deeply against her skin. "I love you, Midge." She smiles and dips her head to kiss his temple.

[charmspoint]

🌿for the writers truth or dare!

Thank you for the ask!

Ask game

🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

Cradling your face in my hands

YOUR BODY IS NOT A MACHINE. NEITHER IS YOUR MIND.

Idk about you anon in particular, but I've found that I often have writers blocks the most when I push myself too much. I'm currently in a writing low, which is normal because I'm right off a really really big project and I need to replenish my energy. I also had a really big writing block when I came crashing down from 2021 when I wrote a truly dumb number of fics for me. This one happened because I got caught up in the fandom craze and tried to pump out a lot of high quality fics fast, because that is what fandom demands from writers and artists these days. Fast and quality. This of course wasted a lot of mental and emotional energy which couldn't be compensated by the at the time abysmal comment frequency (Recently I've been getting a lot more comments and I hope everyone else is too. It would feel nice to be out of this dark feedback era).

So to reiterate.

Your body is not a machine.

Think about what is happening around you in life. Are you stressed about school, college, work? Are you having social problems? Are you spending too much time online? Do you feel like you constantly have to be pumping out projects or people will stop paying attention?

From my experience, writing block is very rarely about the inability to write itself. Inability to write is a side effect of something else. A big project, complicated outside factors, external pressure, or just the fact that you got a new game and you are using all your time to play your game and not doing anything else (person who is not obsessed with BG3 atm). Usually when these are dealt with and you renew energy after them, writing will come back on its own.

You need to be kind to yourself.

I find this to be the best advice in many situations.

Pushing yourself to do what you can't do at the moment will only result in further frustration. Yes, it's good to have a writing habit, but I advocate for that to be a low goal one. My goal is 200 words a day. Sometimes I don't manage to do this because life is complicated but 6 days out of 7 I do. This keeps you on track, doesn't let your brain stale, but also isn't just torturing you.

If you are lacking in creativity you need to EXPERIENCE THINGS. Read that book you've been putting off, start a new manga, watch a movie, beyond that, take a daily walk, go to a museum, discuss ideas with your friends. I hate the phrase media consumption but I do like eating imagery and your brain NEEDS to eat. It needs to experience different art forms to be able to produce ideas of its own. Fanfiction is fine too, but unless you know a really amazing writer who brings a lot of new things into their work, I wouldn't recommend it, because in the end fanfiction is just exploration of a familiar thing. Thing you are stuck on. DON'T function only on fanfiction.

Let your material REST. If you are stuck on the fic, shove it in a folder and don't look at it for a week. Try not to think about it too much, do some of the things above and let your work rest. After a week you'll forget the finer details of it and will be able to look at it more objectively, which might help you resolve the thing you were stuck on. Also sometimes when you read your own fic a fresh you get those 'I´m a fucking genius' moments which is always great.

BE KIND TO YOURSELF.

Don't create on anyone's schedule but your own. I know how incredibly hard it is, I've felt it too, with fandom today which is overly picky, overly judgy and not very grateful. With a fandom that seems to more and more treat its creators as content machines instead of people sharing their passion projects. DON'T WRITE FOR THOSE PEOPLE. It's hard but don't write for the comments in your inbox. Don't set a schedule you can't meet. I've been writing a 17 chapter fic for almost 3 years now because I want a weekly release schedule but I don't want a weekly writing schedule. If your fic takes 6 months, a year or 10, let it take that times, don't shove it out before you feel ready.

BE KIND TO YOURSELF!!!!!!!

Realize that sometimes writing just won't go, no matter what you do. Realize that you aren't a failure or a fraud for this, that it means nothing when it comes to your skill and ability, that the greatest writers ever had struggled with the same thing. Some days you don't have time to write, some days you aren't in the mood to even do the bare minimum. These days will exist and be kind to yourself on them. Your writing won't escape anywhere. Come to terms with being human and come back to it tomorrow.

Hope any of that rant helps hzbjhvh!!!

[wetcatspellcaster]

I present to you an assortment of thoughts and comments on the latest Cooler Than Me chapter conjured by my severely sleep deprived ADHD brain which I don’t have enough brain cells to edit (I’m sorry)

MS. WET CAT I COULDN’T SLEEP AND WAS READING THE NEW CHAPTER AND THEN YOU WRITE STUFF LIKE

"You're the one playing the elf fascist, right?"

AND I FOR THE LIFE OF ME COULDN'T HOLD IT TOGETHER AND BURST OUT LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY AND NOW I'M AFRAID I WOKE SOMEBODY UP

YOUR POWER IS TOO STRONG

Not Astarion thinking Rose is a lesbian because of the word "sapphic" in her signature I love that dumb bitch sm 😭

Not Ms. Wet Cat exploring THEMES and MOTIFS and NARRATIVES in her comedy fic (Astarion feeling some kind of way about Rose being “not interested” bc he’s so used to being seen as a sexual object first and foremost; what will it eventually mean for him to get close with someone who doesn’t just instantly try to get access to his body; what will it mean for him to know that someone can appreciate him even though he never used his persona with them and was just being himself).

My girl Rose is clearly fighting for her life in some moments (we all would in her shoes tbh) and I’m rooting for her and she deserves the world!!!

Bottom line is I love this fic so much 😭😭😭

It’s so true to the original story yet different in all kinds of interesting and exciting ways. Every update is a joy!

Oh and I almost forgot: the name “just giving” instantly made me think that it was a fun gay party with drag artists and maybe a looks competition. I only realized that wasn’t the case when reading the chapter.

look!! romcoms have themes and motifs and narratives!!! i will not have romcom slander!!!! good romance novels have good plot!!!!

but in this case, the modern AU was developed bc I think it gave me an opportunity to explore some themes of Astarion's full access characterisation that previous 'romcom' fics (bleeding heart, party faovurs) didn't have bc they were early access. I took out the magic and the vampirism (why did i take out the magic and the vampirism) and added in a bunch of seduction and performativity because those were the things my early fics didn't have as much of :) so yes. there are themes and motifs in my silly romcom it's just also (i hope) there are good jokes.

anyway i'm dying bc 'just giving' is genuinely something I have heard charity events in the UK called but yes. you are right. very innuendo laden. poor ulder ravengard.

[visualtaehyun]

1 - I don't remember New ever talking about his sexuality or being asked about it, really. He's not the type to openly talk about specifics like that. P'Zee is the exact opposite though, here's one of many times he's talked about his sexuality (translation by me):

- "Actually feelings, time changes all the time. When you like women or like men, it's not as blocked-off these days anymore. Some people may have previously liked women but like men, going forward, it's entirely possible, it's not wrong. We're looking at love." - unintelligible question - "Love? Open. Loving someone isn't wrong, no matter who it is or whatever else, since I already support this." - the question is really soft but I can make out the person asking if friends have wondered about/asked him about who or what he likes, considering he's played in BLs - "Yes, there are/have been, friends of mine thinking about what I am/what I'm like. At this time, I myself don't know yet what I am/what I'm like."

2 - I recently answered an ask about the tiresome But are they dating??? question 🥴 They themselves don't use the word แฟน /faen/ to describe each other or their relationship. They do however use the English word 'partner'. Here's one example of New using it during the acceptance speech for winning the 19th Komchadleuk Awards' คู่จิ้น Y ยอดนิยม (= most popular BL koojin) award (translation by me):

"Don't know if using the word 'koojin/shipped couple/imaginary couple' is correct but... I feel like... Me and hia are- Hia is already the best partner in my life. Thank you."

-> Sidenote: During appearances as public and big as this, New would usually use the pronoun ผม /pom/, when not expressly addressing P'Zee or talking about them as ZNN. Here, however, he's using the pronoun หนู /nuu/ throughout the entire speech, which he normally uses when in conversation with P'Zee. (I've previously talked about his use of pronouns here.) This could kind of factor into your first question since I'm pretty sure most folks would go 🤨🏳‍🌈❔ at hearing a man routinely use the pronoun หนู /nuu/. Non-fans might disregard the sexuality question though since 1) New is cute and petite and thus fits a cute feminine pronoun, 2) ZNN are already known as "Hia & Nuu" so people expect to hear it, and 3) the expectation of being queer is already there for the general public, same as what P'Zee was asked and talked about in that interview up there^ like 'Oh you're in BL, are you...?' It's not a topic I'd like to talk or speculate about though since only just the other week, a hashtag defending New went around on twt and the media after a rando made judgmental comments on twt about how much 'like a girl' New has become, directly referring to his first concert held a few days prior and even dragging other artists like PP Krit and Isbanky into it 😕 If you or anyone is interested in it, I'll write up the post I didn't have time for because it sparked a whole debate and lots of folks and other artists tweeted in defense of him and the artists mentioned, I remember seeing Noeul Nuttarat tweeting too for example. OP, you may have even seen Jamessu's reply to New's tweet addressing the hashtag and thus already know about this.

Back to the topic at hand though!

They don't actually shy away from engaging with couple descriptors like that when they're implied or said to them first, including the word แฟน /faen/ - here's are an older and a recent instance of New doing just that (1st translation by me):

- "On a day off, if you have a lover (faen)- [question to] the both of you- where would you take your lover on a vacation?" - "Well... if I took hia [Zee] to go somewhere, I'd take him to the sea."

And here's an example of P'Zee and the word คู่ครอง /khuu khraawng/ = spouse, partner, husband/wife (not my translation but accurate, source, edit: had to switch from clip to embed bc tumblr is dumb):

I don't really care about 'proving' their status tbh because it is whatever it is to them but since you asked for sources, here's a really long twt thread about just that. If you doubt any of the translation choices or if context seems like it's been misconstrued by eager ZonZons, I will gladly take a look at it. As I said though, they've never publically come out and 'confirmed' to be dating!

Anyway, hope any of this is what you had in mind lol and here's a clip (I can never embed any of P'Leang's tweets so I'm assuming he's disallowed embedding??) from earlier today of them holding hands while on stand-by behind the stage, shared by their manager/caretaker P'Leang. Us ZonZons like to call it 'private but not secret' :D

Someone clarify this for me with sources please~

Are Zee and NuNew 1. queer 2. a couple for real?

No "I heard from other fans that ..." I need actual sources. For my LGBTq+ QL actor list.

[good-oldfashioned-lover]

please elaborate about anything and everything and all things!!!! (Specifically those percy Jackson and rosekiller asks I sent you)

Oh shit I'm so sorry I forgot about the pjo one. I'll get to the rosekiller one in a bit swear.

Ok I haven't yesterday's episode yet but last week's? Oh. My. Gods.

Everything was just🤌🏻✨️

The animals wreaking utter chaos in Vegas was just beautiful to watch. And Grover reassuring them about the animals rather than the citizens had me pausing so I could catch my breathe for bit lmfao.

Wait was the "old married couple" scene in that episode? I don't remember exactly but I'm pretty sure it was. I was like oop- 👀👀👀 when that happned. Also speaking of that scene, I saw some people talking about why Annabeth cut off the iris message and that she had figured it out. And I just have to... bbg no- nope. Annabeth would never have seen that coming even giving as smart as she is. You wanna know why? Cause she trusts Luke. And she would never even imagine him doing that. If she thinks about it she would probably be like hmm... doesn't seem that far fetched for him to do what he does. But she wouldn't have predicted it before hand. Have you seen that guy? He is literally playing 'Mr. good responsible pants' back at camp. So I will not hear you out on that ok? Annabeth cut it off cause she knew he would get mad and she knew herself enough to know that she would never willingly do something that would anger Luke, yk, like go to his dad.

Speaking of his dad, everything about LMM as Hermes was just perfect. Like the whole attitude. The simple at outfit? On. Point. I saw some people in the comments section on some post arguing about how lmm was racist and stuf and I'm so gonna be honest I've run out of fucks to give rn. He is an actor, an artist and I'm appreciating his work that's it. Like everywhere you turn on the internet there is always this argument or that and I am so tired. When it did get like this? Since when did people hyperfixate only on thr bad stuff?! And also, I'm pretty dam sure Rick wouldn't have chosen lmm if the allegations were true.

Ohho yk what I absolutely loved? Annabeth stealing his car keys. Between her doing that and Percy fighting Ares, Percabeth is seriously Percabething rn and I'm so here for it. Oh and the letter lmfao He really said "to the dumb kids"

OH and the 'Bianca!' At 12.30 made me go JSKSNSKDMDND I made my mom sit down and listen to that part again and again just to make sure I wasn't being overly delusional lmfao

Gotta say the changes in the storyline and stuff is making me so emotional. Like one part of me is like nauurr why did they change that right but another part of me loves it cause it's like here you go another version of your favourite trio so it's like I get to not just relive my comfort but also make new memories with it ykwim? Am I not the biggest fan that it's not a copy paste of the books? Sure. But does looking for the new meaning behind the scenes they gave us now and also having a lil bit of suprise element in said changes make me go whee? Absolutely yes.

What else happned in this epi 🤔

I don't remember the exact details cause it's all one storyline in my head now and I can't like seperate anymore lmao. So yeahh... that's it I think hehe

[fang-feraligatr-blog]

A little self introduction...

I have literally nothing to show here, but I do like a lot of things!

Obviously I like Pokemon but I also love Digimon! I have the emotional range of an ocean with the emotional depth of a tablespoon...I may have that backwards... I am actually smart but I play the idiot cause it's more fun and people are more surprised by you when you act dumb but come up with great ideas. I do also like to Role Play and interact with Role Players Blogs because it's fun. I love art but I REALLY love art drawn by internet artists! Yes, even "that" kind (within reason). Now before you read further, I want you to either commit to finishing reading my comment before you say anything about what you read next. If not, stop reading here and go ahead and post your comment. SO:

I am a faithful believer in Christ-BUT!!! I am NOT some crazy Bible Basher that says the GAYS are going to HELL just because some asshole on a podium said he spoke the word of God! Gay rights are human rights! Black lives matter!! I support choice! I am someone who is able to say with the sincerity of my heart my soul and my mind that I AM true to my faith because I believe that my God is a God of Love and not hate! If God moves in mysterious ways then how do you know this person coming out as Trans or Gay or etc. wasn't a part of his plan? You DON'T! So my three big rules for how I live my life are: 1. Acceptance NOT Tolerance

2. Forgiveness NOT Revenge

3. Love NOT Hate

I plan to live with these for the rest of my life, but I admit I'm not perfect at sticking to them. So if you're a person with a unique lifestyle, you're safe with me. I care about people, so all love no hate on MY blog thank you. TL;DR? I like people and want friends! Thanks for reading!

[hydrate-or-diedrate]

Mm this stage is getting more and more sus

HELL YEAH DIRK RIP HER SOUL OUT

Vriska self reflection hour we love to see it

FIDDLE FADDLE

EVIL CAPITALIST JANE YOU PIECE OF SHIT

Terezi don't stop he fucking deserves it goddamn it

Oh Jesus fuck

Gamzee leave her alone oh God oh shit oh fuck oh shit oh

Demon Gamzee is so scary wtf

TEREZIIII

Oh God the condesce is here

Everything's gone to shit

DAMMIT CALIBORN

I just unlocked something called tales from paradox space I think it's time for a break

Oh my goodness these paradox space comics are adorable

John spending quality time with his dad is gonna make me cry

Oh boy Caliborn looked at the manga book apparently

Oh gosh he god tiered

Krabkrab. Honk friend. Cape douche.

Oh my god he made a deviantart

OH MY FUCKING GOD ITS AN ACTUAL PAGE

Thanks, manga! 👍

SHE IS NO DOUBT HOPING FOR... *MUCHAS SMOOCHES*

I'm gonna cry caliborn's art self jerk is so funny

HIS SELF INSERTION GUY

"MY'LADY"

Oh hey, John. Nice to see ya

Oh shit he's mad oh fuck

GAME OVER?

BAHAHAHAHA

OH FUCK MURDER IS HAPPENING

KARKAT NOOO

NO NO NO NO NO NO NOT MY BOY GOD FUCKING DAMMIT

YES KANAYA KILL HIM

NOT DAVE TOO

TEREZIIII

EVERYBODY I CARE ABOUT IS DEAD EXCEPT FOR ROSE AND ROXY AND JOHN

AND MAYBE THE DIRK THATS STILL FLYING IN AT THE EDGE OF THE GODDAMN UNIVERSE

WAAAAAAAAA

FUCK

FUCK YOU ARANEA THIS IS YOUR FAULT

(Little Misfortune voice) Yikes forever

CALIBORN GO AWAY

Screaming

ZILLYLOOT! HONK WHEE TOOT BOING ITS A KICKSTARTER PARODY WHEEEEEEEEEEE

Oh my god caliborn already made a cryptocurrency

All my favorite blorbos are dead how is there supposed to be another entire act of this unless the condesce either brings Jane to life with the ring so she can resurrect people or this is a doomed timeline

Or maybe John can figure out his dumb anti-canon bullshit and fix everything

Hi John:(

Hi Dirk :(

Hi Rose and Roxy :(

NO GODDAMIT ROSE IS DEAD TOO

They're dropping like flies

No fuck off terezi you were so dead back there don't you dare

JADE MADE HER TROLLSONA 🥺🥺

The denizens oh my god John start moving right the fuck now

I have so many tumblr notifications right now and I swear if it's all of you people vaguely giggling in the comments about me approaching the part where everyone dies for real this time I'll lose it /aff

"There's no place like home." John you cheesy motherfucker

Okay so this is not the alpha Jade

Or, judging by adult calliope's story and how John died, it might be the new real Jade?

PISS ASS FUCKING THE OIL BITCH ASS MOTHERFUCK SHIT FUCK AAAAAAA

Hussie you motherfucker you've either been playing the long game from the very beginning or you went back and edited the pages later

WE GET TO HEAR JOHN PLAY MUSIC AGAIN YESSSS

The fireflies 🥹

Oh gosh it's another game

I guess I have to stop here for now aaaaaaaaaa

Day 19 of reading homestuck wow

Oh yay! Roxy got to build her fort! I mean yeah she's still in jail and all that, but fort!

Roxy you boy crazy bitch

John you are exclaiming about the magic ring WAY too loudly

STFU CALIBORN YOUR CURTSINS ARE UGLY

Act 6 act 6 act 2 this is getting egregious

Hi John!! Welcome to scribble hell!

"Respectfully plagiarized"

LOSHIT

FLY, SHIT BISCUIT! FLY!!!

Smut blade? Really??

Me too, John. Me too

I love John so much he's such a little guy

YEAH JOHN TELL HIM

I need to chill before this turns into me just posting frames from the story agsjhdhjs

Okay but this one is really good

Caliborn's ugly ass curtains don't even close 😭

FUCK OFF GAMZEE

FUCK OFF GAMZEE X2 WHY DOES THIS MOTHERFUCKER HAVE THE RING

Aranea?! I swear to fuck you better not turn out to be evil

GODDAMMIT ARANEA THIS MIGHT EVEN BE WORSE THAN BEING EVIL

Aranea this is a really dumb plan

NO NOT THE HUMMINGBIRDS

HEY ARANEA THIS KID IS STILL 16 QUIT GRABBING HIM LIKE THAT

ARANEA THIS IS NOT CONSENSUAL HEALING FUCKING STOP AAAA

Hell yeah Roxy shazam yourself outta there

Aw fuck Jake is going nuclear

Oh my god

GAD ZOOKS

BOY HOWDY

HOLY TOLEDO

LAND SAKES ALIVE

HELLO NURSE

BY GUM

AY CHIHUAHUA

Oh my gosh Dave has a puppet butt watch

BOBS YOUR UNCLE

JUMPIN JEHOSAPHAT

SHIVER ME TIMBERS

WIN

ONE

FOR

THE GIPPER

Aranea what are you doing

ARANEA STOP

JADE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID WICKED WITCH OF THE EAST UNDER THE HOUSE IMAGERY

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Aranea you are so fucking awful

Everything was gonna be fine but nooooo

I am Brain Ghost Dirk.

You kissed my boyfriend.

Prepare to die.

SHUCKY DARN

TEREZI WOOOO

OH FUCK JACK IS HERE

Poor Jade and Calliope waaaaaaa

Jade is making a trollsona 🥺

[welcome-to-afterlife]

Wannabe Challenge Kpop AU Headcanons

I know that no one requested this, but I had this idea stuck in my head for a while now. It took quite some time to get down, but I'm finally done!

Role: Leader, Main Vocalist, Center

Taehee was the first member of the group to be recruited by ST Entertainment. He had a charismatic yet soft aura that drew all the girls on audition day. Immediately, the entertainment company knew that Taehee would become part of their label.

However, it took him a good 5 years before the company decided that he was ready for debut. It was within this time that he learned how to avoid the entertainment industry's sleazy business practices, develop a strong image, and maintain constant motivation for debut. You could say he subconsciously preparing to he a leader by trying to himself afloat for 5 years.

Once he finally got to debut, Taehee was chosen to be the leader of the group. Although Hansol seemed like the more obvious choice, Hansol thought that Taehee would be a better fit since Taehee already knew a lot about the entertainment industry due to his experience. Besides, he was the only one who was mature and emotionally-equipped to lead a group.

As for Taehee's abilities, his strongest suit is his singing. While he wasn't the strongest singer at the start of his training, he ended up become one of the best vocalists in the company. His voice has a unique color that radiates smoothness with a hint of attitude. He's able to hit high notes, but he's a lot better at belting -- especially when he's feeling emotional.

Perhaps this is the reason that Taehee excels in elegant concepts. His graceful movements along with his princely facial expressions make him the star on the stage. Think of songs such as "I'm in Trouble" by NU'EST, "Blue Flame" by ASTRO, and "Not By the Moon" by GOT7. It's like he belongs on an icy throne in a golden palace.

Surprise, surprise: he gets the most lines in their songs. Usually it's not by a lot, but sometimes ST gives some of Biho's lines to Taehee (much to the everyone's dismay). He's never comfortable singing those lines and tries to negotiate to give Biho more lines, but it doesn't always work. He gets quite the backlash for it, but unfortunately it's out of his control.

When interacting with fans, Taehee is usually very warm and kind. He's constantly asking about everyone's health and well-being, nagging fans to keep themselves at top priority. He doesn't want fans to ruin their lives because of their love for him and his group. He's also very earnest and mature, almost like a guardian angel to his fans. Wherever they go, his heart is always with them.

In the group, he's basically the dad. He's always looking out for the other members (yes, even Yooha). Just like his fans, his members' well-being is top priority. In lives, you'll probably see him in the background cooking food, cleaning dorms, and or scolding the other members for doing dumb things (that last reason is why he's also very likely to appear in crack videos).

However, he appears most often in "sassy moment compilations" because of his reactions. Taehee has even gone viral because he just straight up rolled his eyes at a variety show when they asked him uncomfortable questions and threw not-so-subtle shade. From then on, he's been dubbed as the "sassy king".

For side projects, his main path is acting. Taehee is a really good actor who played the main male lead in a critically acclaimed K-Drama. He played the sly but sweet love interest in a historical drama. The audience are always amazed at his ability to adapt to the time period so accurately.... it's almost as if he's lived there himself?

Role: Main Rapper, Lead Dancer, Vocalist

Originally, Yooha has started off as a model. However, staff from ST Entertainment saw Yooha and thought that his visuals would be perfect for the kpop business. They offered their business card to him and he decided to try out for fun. Fortunately, he nailed his audition and was admitted as a trainee immediately.

Yooha was the last person to join the company and had the shortest training time (1 year). His sudden arrival and decision to debut with the group created a rift between him and the other members. Taehee thought it was unfair that Yooha could debut with minimal training while Hansol was worried that Yooha's addition would affect the group's dynamic (in areas like line distribution, dance formation, etc).

However, he and the other members were forced to resolve their issues when he became Taehee's roommate at their dorm. Since it was Taehee's job to lead the group (including Yooha), the two had no choice but to bond.

Now before y'all yell at me that Yooha isn't main rapper material, just know that I had to give the position to someone. Secondly, Yooha has an alluring and deep voice voice that was perfect for rap. Also, he is really good at rapping in various beats and experiments with different flows. While he can do fast raps, he prefers to make ones that have a distinct rhythm and leave a lasting impact on the audience.

However, Yooha hadn't planned to debut as the group's rapper. His original role being the main dancer, but he jokingly rapped in an pre-debut interview and everyone fell in love with his voice. From that, ST Entertainment thought it would be best to make Yooha the rapper instead.

In fan interactions, Yooha is very slick and flirty. Whether it's in fanmeet, lives, or concerts, Yooha knows exactly how to steal the hearts of his fans. Just one wink is enough to make the entire stadium swoon over him.

However, he's also the crackhead of the group. If you search for the group's "crackhead moment compilations", 80% of the video will involve Yooha somehow. In fact, it's these moments that really boost his popularity within the group and skyrocket him to the 2nd most popular member in the group.

Sometimes, he manages to pull one over Taehee and becomes the most popular member. How does this happen? Well, whenever the group has a "bad boy"/sexy concept comeback, Yooha absolutely dominates the stage. Think of songs such as "Want" by Taemin, "7th Sense" by NCT U, and "Love Killa" by Monsta X. The sexy concept was made for him, so it's no surprise when everyone in the comments section thirsts over him. It's just enough to put him over the edge against Taehee in fan voting.

He also has the most risque outfits. Yooha has an amazing body and he knows it, so why keep it hidden? His wardrobe is filled with experimental pieces that show of his abs, forearms, and everything in between. It's the reason why he's voted "Best Dressed" on every voting app.

Yooha is also a smooth dancer. His fluidity and confidence amplifies his sex appeal on stage, which often causes fans to confuse him as the group's main dancer. He's also has killer facial expressions that maintain his striking stage presence, making it impossible to keep your eyes off of him.

When Yooha isn't rocking the stage, you'll probably see him on magazines and commercial shoots. Photographers just can't get enough of his visuals, so they constantly bring him back for more modeling. He'll even dabble his feet in web dramas, but it doesn't last for long due to the scheduling conflicts between the web dramas and his music career.

Position: Main Dancer, Main Vocalist, Producer, Face of the Group

Hansol started his music journey long before ST Entertainment. He had been creating music as early as elementary school (mainly him bashing wooden sticks on the table and strumming rubber bands). However, he really got to develop his passion on high school-- where he dedicated his time towards music production and music theory.

Thus, Hansol had his own YouTube channel where he created covers of different artists and snippets of songs that he created on his own. From that, he amassed a small following of 25K subscribers. This audience attracted ST Entertainment, who took a liking to his videos and asked him whether he wanted to be a trainee. Hansol gladly took the offer.

Hansol was the 2nd member to join ST and trained for 3 years. Although the company had given him the opportunity to debut immediately, Hansol wanted to wait until he reached his full potential.

While Hansol originally was the leader of the group (since he already had a fairly stable music presence), he had to product all their music. This ate up leadership time, which Hansol was having difficulty in managing. Besides, he thought that Taehee was more mature than him and thought Taehee would do a better job as a leader. Hansol ended up handing the leader role to Taehee before debut.

Hansol's production has been praised by critics, fans, and other producers. His vision for the song helps the group distinguish themselves from the other acts in the entertainment industry and create their own identities as a group. Sometimes he writes songs with Biho (or by himself) to better convey his emotions onto their group's album.

Hansol is the group's ace: he can sing, dance, and even rap. He's equally talented at singing and dancing, so he decided to take main positions for both skills. In his singing, Hansol has a high-pitched voice that makes it easy for him to hit high notes and belt to his heart's content. In fact, many of his lines in the songs are his adlibs (which give the song that extra spice).

Hansol's dancing style is sharp and energetic. There's a lot of power in his movements with playful facial expressions (in contrast to Yooha's powerful, sexy style). This allows him to steal the spotlight when the group has a playful and upbeat comback (think "Energetic" by Wanna One, "Sha La La" by Pentagon, and "BBUSYEO" by ONEUS). His bright grin is enough to light up the entire stadium while keeping fans engaged throughout the performance.

The group's debut turned out pretty successful thanks the Hansol's YouTube fanbase. With his enlarged presence, Hansol is the "Face of the Group"-- the most recognizable member to the general public. While he isn't the most popular within his group's fans, Hansol is the most liked across the general public.

Hansol's personality around fans is very bubbly. He loves playing up his cute, boyish charms to win over the fans (especially when they drool over Yooha). There's a lot of winking, heart signs, pouting, and hugs whenever Hansol interacts with his fans.

Within the group, Hansol is the baby. Although he isn't the youngest, he acts the most immature. He's always nagging the other members and trying to prove his manliness, but it's more like a puppy trying to intimidate a pack of wolves.

For side projects, Hansol would have a solo debut. He'd produce all the music on his album while collaborating with Biho for songwriting. Since it's his solo career, Hansol would have much more creative control-- allowing him to fully explore every corner of his artistry. He plans to continues his solo career long after the group disbands too.

Position: Lead Vocalist, Rapper, Songwriter, Visual, Maknae

Biho was the 3rd member to join ST Entertainment. Out of the 4, he was the only one who submitted a formal audition tape to ST Entertainment and got accepted through the traditional audtion process. What made his audtion special was that he performed his own song-- a love song to his future lover. The judges absolutely loved his vibe and voice, so they couldn't pass this opportunity.

When Biho became a trainee, he always felt insecure about his skills. Even though he was talented, Biho was training with the likes of Taehee and Hansol, who were already experienced and seasoned professionals. Biho thought he'd be holding his group back, but the other members assured him that his presence made a significant impact on the group.

And honestly, it really did because Biho wrote most of their songs. His lyrics were both thought-provoking and poetic. He was never afraid of writing music about the things on his mind (whether it was love, fear, anger, or sadness). However, editing the lyrics took a lot of time as Biho only wanted to make the best content for his fans. Sometimes he lets Hansol write music with him.

Biho's strength lies in his singing (like most of the other members). His voice is soft and breathy, almost like a lullaby wrapping you in a soft blanket. No matter how you're feeling, Biho's voice is guaranteed to calm your nerves and take to your safe place.

Biho is also known for his looks. Although Yooha is the group's top model, Biho's face is the perfect canvas for all types of makeup styles. Although he doesn't realize it, fans love the duality between his soft persona and his darker one. Many are surprised that Biho is able to make the switch for sexier concepts and absolutely die when he does.

However, Biho shines the most with soft boy concepts. It's the image that he's had for the longest and is most comfortable with. Besides, the more thoughtful and heartfelt songs are where his lyrics get to shine through-- making him extra happy. For reference, the best examples of soft boy songs that suits Biho would be "Spring Day" by BTS, "Don't Wanna Cry" by SEVENTEEN, "Blue Hour" by TXT.

In fan interactions, Biho is extremely warm and a tad bit shy. He's always blushing when fans compliment him and showers his fans with a bunch of love in return. He likes to take his fans' hands and sincerely thank them for their support because his group would be nothing without them.

In fact, Biho is the most likely to get emotional while performing. The fact that there are so many people who are willing to listen to his music and his message is something that he could barely dream of. He will be forever indebted to their kindness, which is why he tries go provide his fans with all a lot of content (lives, Q+As, pop-up fansigns).

In the group, Biho isn't much different. In fact, he's the member whose idol persona matches his real personality the most. He's always cheering hisnother members from the side and gushing about how amazing they are. Sometimes he likes to throw an occasional jab at Yooha though (especially when Yooha is feeling himself too much).

For side projects, Biho is working on a book! He already has a collect of poems that was published, which has recieved high praise from critics and other poets. He also spends time writing songs for other groups, especially ones that come from small, poor companies.

[love-your-enthusiasm]

3, 13, 15 and 21!

I'm so sorry it took me so long to get to this one! I've had a much busier day than normal and wanted to give these some thought. I love all of these questions! I've already answered 3 and 15, but I have more to say on them anyway (quel surprise) so here we go:

(I'm going to answer 3 last so I can put it under the "read more".)

13. Favorite writing song/artist/album of this year?

It has to be The Oh Hellos, by a long shot. (Probably Boreas or Hello, My Old Heart, if we're talking specific songs.) Honorable mentions go to quite a lot of Hozier while writing In The Woods Somewhere (his voice was the vibe), and I also played the heck out of Kenna's A & L playlists on Spotify. Mostly A.

15. Something you've learned this year?

Honestly, the biggest thing I've learned this year is to not be afraid to put myself out there. Back in August, I was so nervous to post my writing. I didn't think I was good enough at it, for one. I was also really nervous to interact with anyone in fandom, other than responding to comments they'd left on my fic. I think I had this weird subconscious idea that I had to earn the right to participate in fandom in a more involved way than just hanging out on the edges and watching (which yes, I recognize is completely absurd.) But anyway, I forced myself out of my comfort zone, I posted my story, I interacted with you lovely people, and I posted another story. And another. And I'm just having the best time, so thanks, everyone, for being such a joy to know. I'm really glad to have fandom friends.

Another thing I've learned is… quite a lot of Italian. I currently have a 134 day streak going on DuoLingo. Now I just wish I had someone to speak it to instead of just speak it at. 🙃

21. Most memorable comment/review?

Ohh… I really hate that the single one I remember most is the one person who went back to my first fic two months after it was all finished to tell me that they didn't like the way I solved a logistics problem right before the climax (because that's really all it wound up being, once you read the next chapter. But they commented before they read that chapter, so 😩) Which, okay, fair, I did cheat and have them talk it out sooner than they'd initially agreed to. But like… the story had been finished for months at that point, so the comment accomplished nothing but just telling me they didn't like it. They weren’t mean about it or anything, at least; just kind of gave that little inner critic a bit of validation. “See? Told you it was dumb.” BUT, I got so many more absolutely lovely comments that it did make the criticism easier to take for what it was- just like, your opinion, man. It was a free novella, okay? And really, it wasn’t that bad.

Also, I got quite a few comments on Small Things from people who said it left them feeling warm and happy, and even quoting one of the lines back, and all of those just absolutely made my day.

3. Favorite Scene/Line You've Written This Year?

Poor Luca, I just filled his flashbacks with embarrassing memories in his POV fic. This one still never fails to make me laugh and cringe. (For context, this is Luca's final flashback in Look Ahead, Look Behind when Giulia's trying to set him up on a date with one of her fellow grad students. It does not go well, bless him.)

He sighed. Why couldn’t it have been about spinning strings and dual resonance models? Luca could talk intelligently about string theory, but he didn’t even know where to begin asking questions about microbiology. He had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach, but his worrying was interrupted by Giulia sliding her hand into his.

“We’d better go grab our seats. We want to make sure we’re where he can see you,” she said, tugging him through the doors into the auditorium. Did they? Luca didn’t think they did.

She pulled him down the aisle, stopping at the third row to the front and pushing him down to the middle seats. Luca looked longingly at the back row, but reluctantly sat where he was directed. He shrugged out of his coat, already starting to feel nervous sweat forming under his arms. Hopefully his fishy musk didn’t overpower his deodorant. He was glad he’d worn extra. Nico sat on the other side of Giulia, their fingers intertwined together, his other hand trailing up and down her leg.

‘Jesus, get a room,’ Luca thought. At least he wasn’t going to be the only one here who was completely lost, though. Given there was a slim chance that sequencing RNA or whatever had anything to do with analysis of early 19th century Romanticism, there was no way Nico was going to understand half of what this guy had to say. He could at least find some solidarity there.

Julien approached the podium and introduced himself in a strong French accent. This did not bode well for Luca’s understanding of the topic. He did have to give Giulia credit, though- Julien was definitely handsome. He looked like he’d wandered out of an advertisement for adventurous vacations, like mountain climbing or backpacking across volcanoes. Square-jawed and rugged, he didn’t look like he spent most of his time in a lab bent over a microscope, and Luca did have to admit that his long sideburns worked quite well with his shaggy, dirty blond hair. Maybe he could try small talk, just this once.

He spent the next hour lost in thought, wondering about the kinds of things Julien must get up to to maintain such an effortlessly rugged physique, not to mention what kind of time management skills must go into keeping that kind of schedule along with researching a doctoral thesis. Did he even have time for breakfast?

Giulia jabbed her elbow into his ribs.

“Ow, what?” he whispered.

“Raise your hand,” she instructed, and Luca did so without thinking. He realized too late that this meant it was time for the question and answer session, and he was the only one with his hand in the air. He hadn’t heard a single word the guy had said. How the hell was he supposed to ask an intelligent question?

“Oui, monsieur, with the glasses.”

For what had to be the first time in his life, Luca’s brain was almost completely silent. The only thing pinging around his head was the word “breakfast,” an echo of the last coherent thought he’d had. He panicked.

“Uhm, sì. Do, uh- do French people eat breakfast?” he heard himself say, absolutely horrified but unable to stop as the words tumbled from his mouth of their own accord.

He sucked his lips between his teeth as Giulia slowly turned to gape at him as if he had five heads, eyes wide as saucers. Somewhere behind him, someone coughed. His dearest wish in that moment was that a sinkhole would open beneath his chair and swallow him, or else a freak accident would occur and he’d somehow be struck by lightning and disintegrated. He felt his cheeks burning and did his best not to slide onto the floor.

Julien blinked at him, clearly not anticipating that category of question. To his credit, he simply responded, “Oui,” and moved on to the next question, which blessedly followed quickly.

Luca sank down into his seat and concentrated very hard on the second hand of his watch as it ticked its way around the face, as though watching a countdown to imminent doom.

[famous-aces]

Marilyn Monroe

Who: Marilyn Monroe (born Norma Jeane Mortenson) 

What: Actress, Model, and Singer

Where: American-Jewish (active largely in US)

When: June 1, 1926 - August 4, 1962

(Image Description: a photo of Marilyn Monroe by Richard Avedon from 1957. It is a black and white image showing Monroe on a sparkly dress from the waist up. It almost feels weird to describe her, her face is so famous. She is a white pale woman with an oval face and heavily lidded eyes with long lashes. She has full lips with a beauty mark beside them. She is wearing makeup and has her trademark short, curly, blonde hair. She has her arms hanging limply at her side. Instead of posing sexily she looks to be lost in thought, looking somewhere off camera. End ID) 

Marilyn Monroe is The Hollywood Beauty. The quintessential sexy starlet. Even if you have never seen a movie with her in it, you know who she was, a bit like possible aces I have covered before Andy Warhol or Sir Isaac Newton, you can picture her in your mind just by existing in Western popular culture. She has become a part of our communal consciousness. Her life was brief and marked by tragedy below the glitz and glamor. Her biggest role was playing Marilyn Monroe.

She was intelligent, warm, and a gifted actress, but she is rarely remembered for that. She is far better remembered for singing Happy Birthday to her sometime beau President Kennedy and for the scene in The Seven Year Itch when wind from a subway grate blows up her skirt. You've seen it. Really her whole persona was often created rather than who she really was. She was an actress in her real life, unfortunately.

Monroe actually came into the spotlight in the Second World War when she posed for photos for the boys on the front. From there her modeling, singing, and acting career skyrocketed. Until her tragic death at the age of 36 she was among the go-to actresses for those sexpot roles especially in comedies. Her death by potentially intentional drug overdose (discovered by her psychologist) is just one piece of the evidence of how much of her life was hidden, like her struggles with substance abuse and mental health.

She was famous for playing Blond Bombshells and Dumb Blonds.  She was all beauty, glamor, and sex appeal and it earned her millions of dollars. She always wanted to be more though, unfortunately she never really got it. "Please don't make me a joke," she told a journalist, "End the interview with what I believe...I want to be an artist, an actress with integrity...I want to grow and develop and play serious dramatic parts. My dramatic coach tells everyone that I have a great soul, but so far nobody's interested in it." 

She is best known for as an icon and emblem of the popular culture of the 1950s and early 1960s, but her most definitive/important roles include All About Eve (1950) (a small role that would lead to her "discovery" and contract with 20th Century Fox), Monkey Business (1952), How to Marry a Millionaire (1953), Niagara (1953), Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953), The Seven Year Itch (1955), Some Like it Hot (1959), The Misfits (1961), and her final film, released posthumously as a short, Something's Gotta Give (1962). She also sang "Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend" and the very sexually charged "Happy Birthday Mr. President" (just the song here). 

(Image Description: the poster for Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. It shows drawings of Jane Russel and Marilyn Monroe in red costumes the size and shape of one piece bathing suits that are sheer or pink on top. They have on red top hats and long black and white necklaces. They have black canes and are dancing with one leg upraised. Behind them is a busy Paris scene done in a more cartoony/simplified style. There are musical notes around them. Their names are above their heads in blue.  Below them on a black rectangle it says (in white and orange) "in Howard Hawks' Gentlemen Prefer Blondes [in] Technicolor" below that rectangle but above the studio info in blue it says "co-starring Charles Coburn". End ID) 

Probable Orientation: Mspec Ace

Oh, I am going to get a lot of hate for this one.

And a lot of people are going to show a lot of misogyny and aphobia, be it overt, unintentional, or internalized.  Indeed the first thing the first (allo) person I told these findings to said "but she had a ton of sex!" Yes, that is true, she did, and so do some other aces.

Not to mention that Monroe's relationship with sex was a complicated one. A very complicated one. Monroe had a deeply traumatic childhood (mentally ill mother, tossed between foster homes and orphanages) and married extremely young -- she had turned 16 just two and a half weeks earlier -- to prevent her from becoming homeless and returned to the orphanage after her most recent foster family planned on moving out of state and leaving her behind. Then while working a munitions plant in L.A. she became a model for the troops in World War II, aged 18. From her teen years she was made aware that sex was expected from her, thrust into adulthood and positions she might not have been comfortable with. She was a beautiful woman and people wanted her and she accepted that because it did get her what she wanted.

(Image Description: the 1944 factory photos that launched Monroe's modeling career, taken by David Conover for Yank Magazine at the Radioplane Munitions Factory in which she worked. Interestingly the commanding officer that sent him to take the photos was Ronald Reagan. The photo shows an 18-year-old Monroe. She is holding a small propeller and is beside some kind of red machine. She is wearing a simple green top and gray bottoms with a photo ID badge at her waist. She wears a wedding ring. She has much frizzier brown hair. She is smiling broadly. End ID)  

Over the course of her life she was in love with and had sexual relationships with many different men and women. That doesn't mean she was sexually attracted to them. Indeed throughout her life she had a lot of difficulty with sex. She didn't like it. She thought she must have been doing it "wrong" and stated that a lot of her sex appeal was applied to her rather than something she felt. She was playing to the crowd. Which makes sense, Monroe was a people pleaser. She desired closeness, she romantically loved many people, I have no doubt, and from the time she was a teenager the best appreciated way to show it was by being sexual. The fact that later in life she had a sexual encounter with a literal 16-year-old when she was 30 shows she had a pretty fucked up understanding of what was appropriate sexually. The 16-year-old was the leader of her fan club, she also had an affair with her acting coach, her first husband was her neighbor who was kind to her. She was loving the people who loved her and was showing it the way society told her to. (On her being mspec, there were several women she had affairs with, including the fan and acting coach mentioned above, indeed it has been speculated she was more attracted to women than men).

No matter how she appeared on screen, she voiced fear that she was broken and frigid to her psychologist (who agreed with her) because she didn't really enjoy/want sex.  The desire of wanting to fix herself and wanting to please the people who loved her and who she may have romantically loved in return. She probably romantically loved some of these people but didn't know how to separate that from the sexual aspect or didn't want to lose them if she did. She was giving them what they wanted and expected and what culture told her was essential to normal loving relationships.

Her sexual "failure" was a subject she returned to often in therapy throughout her life. She had only one sexual encounter she actually said she enjoyed and it seemed to be more of a relief because it made her normal than what she got from the sex itself.

She said again and again that she wasn't the sexpot people thought she was, nobody listened.

(Image Description: a series of photos from a photoshoot from Life Magazine. It shows Monroe at home in 1953, a huge year in her career. The photographer is Alfred Eisenstaedt [a photographer of whose work I am extremely fond]. They show Monroe wearing a dark turtleneck and checkered trousers. She is in a bunch of different positions and wearing different expressions. Some of these appear candid and others posed. I am especially fond of one in the middle in which she appears to be trying to stop herself from laughing or sneezing. I like to imagine it is the former. It is very human. End ID)

“People had a habit of looking at me as if I were some kind of mirror instead of a person. They didn’t see me, they saw their own lewd thoughts, then they white-masked themselves by calling me the lewd one.”

-Marilyn Monroe

"I never quite understood it, this sex symbol. I always thought symbols were those things you clash together! That's the trouble, a sex symbol becomes a thing. I just hate to be a thing. But if I'm going to be a symbol of something I'd rather have it sex than some other things they've got symbols of."

—Monroe in an interview for Life in 1962 (both of these quotes illustrate that her "sex appeal" was manufactured and applied rather than her own natural state. Her audience made it clear what they wanted and she played to it.)

"A man who had kissed me once had said it was very possible that I was a lesbian because apparently I had no response to males - meaning him...I didn't contradict him because I didn't know what I was... Now, having fallen in love, I knew what I was. It wasn't a lesbian."

-Marilyn Monroe in her autobiography My Story (written 1954, published 1974). (Note that she has "no response". She loves a man, this one or another, but she has "no response" to men physically. That is the only response he could comment on, her physical one. Clearly she feels some kind of attraction to someone eventually, but not sexually/physically. It is the difference between romantic and sexual love. It also shows that homosexuality and asexuality have always overlapped.)

"Primary frigidity" 

-the diagnosis from Monroe's therapist Dr. Ralph Greenson, he worked to "cure" her of this "frigidity"

“Maybe I’m a sexless sex goddess.” 

– Marilyn Monroe to Life magazine journalist Richard Meryman, 1961

(Image Description: a photo of Marilyn Monroe behind the scenes on the set of The Misfits in 1960, photographed by Inge Morath.  She is leaning across a table and smiling at someone to the right of the frame. She has tired eyes. End ID) 

[cidthecoatrack-blog]

Then I shall!

Produced by Guilermo del Toro, so that's a very strong place to start.

Not part of any pre-existing franchise, no sequels - is just an excellent standalone movie

About the Day of the Dead, but is not stereotypical. Treats it as a folk tale, incredibly well done.

The casting is on effing point. The lead is Diego Luna (excellent), female lead is Zoe Seldana (and you get to hear her sing!), other big strong dumb but big-hearted lead is Channing Tatum (perfect casting). The rest of the cast is freaking star-studded. Ice Cube, Ron Perlman, Hector Elizondo (probably recognize him from Princess Diaries), Danny Trejo, Placido FUCKING Domingo (yeah, the opera singer), Gabriel Iglesias, Cheech Marin, and a whole host of other Hispanic actors.

Animated, and by GOD is it gorgeous. Watch the scene of Manolo standing in the rain. The animation of the rain on him is BREATHTAKING

So many DIFFERENT animation styles. Yes, it's all computer animated, but to give you a nesting doll of flavor: A) "humans" who are telling/hearing the story, B) wooden puppets (a majority of what we see) - THE WOOD ANIMATION IS STUNNING, C) The Dead (beautifully artistic skeletons), D) the dieties (La Muerta, Xibalba, and the Candle Maker), E) don't forget the bandits and Chakal (also puppets, but made grotesque/have metal parts)

There is SO MUCH DETAIL in the way these characters are animated. Just little details they didn't HAVE to do, but they did anyway. Like how Xibalba has skulls for pupils. Or how the wooden puppets move LIKE WOODEN PUPPETS. Or (personal favorite) how the dead are skeletons with the bones just floating near enough (no tissue and all), and then they PLAY ON THAT and let the dead just arbitrarily detach their heads, arms, etc.

THE MESSAGING. OH MY GOD THE MESSAGING. You know how Turning Red and Encanto smacked us all in the face with "dealing with family trauma"? Yeah, this movie was a decade ahead of its time. Manolo's father wants him to be a bullfighter, as is the family tradition, and he is a GREAT bullfighter, but he wants to perform music instead. When he goes to the Land of the Remembered and meets his ancestors, he finds that no small number of his ancestors regretted being a bullfighter! (They all died fighting bulls). One very specifically wishes he could have been an opera singer. And Manolo's major conflict at the end? Fighting all the bulls that his family had slain, and ends up winning by APOLOGIZING to the bulls (with a freaking BEAUTIFUL song). And just EVERY single storyline has things with that much positivty. Even Xibalba, the evil villain god, who is also in love with La Muerta (and her him!), learns his lesson and apologizes (genuinely!) to La Muerta.

Let us not forget Maria, the female lead. The two male leads are competing for her (ugh, stereotypical, I know), but they are all childhood friends first and foremost. Maria is sent off to become "a Lady", and when she comes back, they literally comment on how "normal" she looks. Now, these are the animated, exaggerated wooden puppets, and she has what I'm pretty sure is a literal pencil for a waist, so I can't really claim "body positivity" here. But they don't play up how beautiful she is. And MAN is she independent. She does NOT put up with ANY toxic crap from her father, from Manolo and Joaquín, from the village, from anyone. And ultimately SHE is the one who leads the town to victory against the bandits (because one of the running jokes is the ridiculous list of skills she picked up becoming "a Lady". Like swordfighting. And kung fu.)

And HOT DAMN the comedy in this movie is *chef's kiss*. "Frosted" churros anyone? The priest turning into a luchadore. The nuns always speaking in musical chorus. "I immediately regret this decision!" Almost everything the grandma says and does. Very self-aware of the tropes they could play on and just chucking them right back at the audience as jokes. Splendid.

AND THE MUSIC. Most of the songs are covers, but beautifully done in music and style that fits the characters and themes of the movie. "I Can't Help Falling in Love" is downright unfair in how beautiful it is. "I Will Wait" covered in Mariachi style is fantastic. Manolo singing "Creep" is also very apropos and well-done. There are two original songs: "I Love You Too Much" and "No Matter Where You Are". Both SLAP, but there's additional fun: "No Matter Where You Are" is originally by the band Us the Duo. They literally sung this song AS THEIR WEDDING VOWS. AT THEIR WEDDING. WHERE THEY PREMIERED THIS SONG. And it's just this amazingly uplifting, positive, happy, beautiful song. (Personal bias: my wife and I love this song so much that it was our first dance at OUR wedding.) And yes, they play it after Manolo and Maria get married (sorry for the spoilers for the decade-old movie).

I could literally keep going on, but I'll leave it at that

So just so y'all know, The Book of Life (2014) is a fucking MASTERPIECE, is CRIMINALLY underrated, and should have won EVERY GODDAMN AWARD.

[lady-indiana]

Practice Challenge {pt. 2}

Read PART 1

Part 2

An hour after I had heard the news, I was driving through the streets of downtown Lauderdale.

My hands were clutched tightly to the wheel as I turned into the library on the west side of town. This library, once surrounded by overgrown grass and falling apart at the edges, was now the nicest building on this side of town. 

It had a parking lot, even though most of the people and children who used it didn’t own cars. It was made of bricks, some discolored from the repairs done in the past year. 

On the pathway leading up, there were cute little signs with frogs and bunnies that said sayings like “reading is FUN!” and “Reading takes you on adventures!”

I parked the car, taking the keys out of the ignition and walked up the path to the door. In the entrance of the library, there was a little foyer with more posters and signs with positive sayings and quotes. 

To the left, there was a pinboard displaying different activities and demonstrations they were holding. I walked down the hallway, heading into the main room, and looked around. I spun slowly, gazing up at the Illéa approved books that lined the shelves.

In the corner of the room, there was a line of new computers.

I thought back to my childhood when this little building was a refuge for all of the other homeless kids I ran around with. We were all in the lower castes, and this library was open to the public, specifically the lower castes. Now, there were almost triple the books they had back then. There also used to be only one old computer.

And when I finally took control of it over some kid was playing an online game that took forever, it was where I edited my first short film at the age of thirteen. The short film that changed my life.

I was spooked by a voice, “Oh! Indie!”

Meredith, the 70-year-old something woman who had been running the library as a volunteer for as long as I knew came out from her office. She was a sweet woman, who cared a lot about education and creativity and making the world a better place. I really liked Meredith.

“Hi Meredith,” I said, smiling in her direction.

“I can’t believe it! I really can’t believe it, Indie! You’re one of the Selected!”

I giggled, watching her get all excited.

“I know, I really can’t believe it either.”

I looked down, sudden feeling… embarrassed, overwhelmed, unworthy?

“Oh, sweetie, you will be great. The prince is going to love you! I just know it!”

I chuckled softly at her optimism. 

“Just to think,” Meredith continued. “Almost ten years ago you were hanging out here, trying to run complex editing software on that old dinosaur of a computer, and now you are about to head off to the palace!”

I looked around at the place, smiling contently. “It is amazing, isn’t it?”

“You deserve it, sweetie.”

“Thanks,” I responded, though I wasn’t sure if I believed her. “I just wanted to come by, and ask if you and the library will be alright while I’m on gone. If there’s anything you need before I go, let me know, and I’ll make sure it gets done. I’m not sure how much communication I’ll have access to while I’m there.”

“Oh, honey, you’ve already done enough. Look at this place! Look at everything you’ve already done to make it better!” she said, gesturing around at the room.

“I just want to make sure,” I said, smiling kindly.

“Well, the only thing I can think of is that we’ll have to postpone the camera seminar that you were supposed to teach. That’s no problem though! I’d teach it myself, but you know I don’t know how to work technology to save my life.”

“Maybe I can see if I can get one of my friends from Angeles to fly in and teach it. I know a lot of the kids were looking forward to it.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that. I’m sure you are going to be busy in the next few days.”

“It’s the least I can do.”

“Really, sweetie, I want you to focus on yourself. This is a big opportunity. If anyone could be our future princess, I’d want it to be you.”

I sighed, grabbing Meredith’s hands in thanks.

“Well, then,” I said. “If you do need anything… repairs, books, lunch for the kids... put in on my tab.”

Meredith smiled, pulling me in for a hug that I reciprocated. “We will be fine. Have a great time, kiddo.”

I smiled, stepping back and looking around the room again. Finally, I waved goodbye and headed back out to my car, so I could go home and get ready for my life to change. Again.

---

I arrived to the airport early. It was a habit, really. Engrained in me from day one on my film internship when I was younger: Being early is being on time. And being on time shows that you care.

The plane was much like one I had flown in several times. Private planes were always rented out by the studios when we had to travel cross country for a shoot, so it was nothing new.

The leather seats, however, were surprisingly soft, and I placed my carry on bag in one of the overhead bins.

I knew there were supposed to be three other girls joining me for the flight. They were all from different provinces and were also selected. I had done minimal research on each of the girls, not because I didn’t want to know, but because I didn’t want to psych myself out. 

When I researched something, I researched it intensely. I wrote notes all over, I made webs, I scribbled one-liners-- another habit I had developed from filmmaking. So, instead, I opted for just looking at their names and faces and provinces. Though, there were too many to remember for now.

My leg shook as I waited for the others to arrive. Suddenly, I was regretting my no-research strategy. I was going in blind, and I had no idea if I would even get along with any of these girls. What if they thought I was pretentious because I am two? What if they hate my movies?

Not a real concern, but I had seen some nasty haters before.

Just then, a girl walked onto the plane. Her golden hair made her shine in the sunlight, and she smiled brightly.

“Hi! I’m Evalin!” she said, walking further onto the plane.

I smiled back, happy that so far, Evalin seemed very kind. “Hi Evalin! I’m Indie.”

She sat down in the chair across the aisle from me, and turned so she was facing me. 

“It’s nice to meet you!” she said. “You’re from Clermont, right?”

Clearly, Evalin was more researched than I was. I only had to remember three other girls and their provinces for this plane ride and was already drawing a blank. I suddenly felt dumb.

“Yes! I am... and you're from... remind me again?” I responded, smiling sheepishly.

Evalin, cool as ever while smoothing out her skirt said, “Carolina. You’re a movie director, right?”

So, she knew me knew me.

I tried to give a kind smile, hoping to come off as humble but I worried about failing. “I am. What is your profession?”

“I’m still in college, but I’m studying biology.”

College. I thought that was pretty cool. It had always seemed like an interesting path, but by the time I graduated high school, I was already in the film industry and no one thought I needed to pursue a degree. I guess they were right because a year later, I was nominated for an Illéan Oscar Award.

“Oh wow,” I said. “That's really cool. I could never do science.”

It was true, science was a nightmare in school. That, and math. 

“Thanks! It’s second nature for me, really. I grew up around it,” she said, smiling sheepishly. “I think it’s really cool what you do, though! I’ve never had that kind of artistic vision!”

Evalin, though going into a field much different than mine, was clearly just as passionate as I was. She was sweet, and I was really liking her so far. I hoped that she liked me too.

“Aw, thank you. It's the only thing I could ever do, and I'm glad. I truly love it. The profession saved me in a way.”

Another truth. Without film, I would be nothing. 

“That’s amazing!! That kind of passion is very admirable!”

I grinned, feeling great and confident now that I had one good interaction under the belt. Besides, this type of conversation I was used to. The film industry was all about networking after all. And passion pays off. It’s easy to talk about one’s passions and Evalin and I were both clearly passionate.

Suddenly, I glanced over at the digital clock on the wall of the plane. The schedule had said the plane would be leaving in a few minutes. We were still missing two girls.

“We are still waiting on two more right?” I asked. “The plane is supposed to leave soon.”

Evalin looked over her shoulder out of her window. “Looks like one is coming now!”

Just as she said that, a girl came rushing into the plane. She was distracted, glancing back over her shoulder ever few moments with a stare of curiosity. 

“Sorry, sorry, my parents kept saying goodbye,” she explained, but then, she turned, smiling. “Idalia Moretti. What about you guys?”

She walked over to an empty seat and plopped down. I couldn’t help but stare at her amused. She was a chaotic force but still seemed like she was excited and nervous. She reminded me of the interns on a film set.

Evalin responded first. “Evalin Berg. It’s nice to meet you!”

I responded right after. “Hi! I'm Indie!”

Just then, the last girl entered. Her name, I actually remembered. Shala Lie. She had headphones in and stared at the ground, ignoring all of us. She sat far away, and stared at the window. We all watched for a second, before turning back to one another.

“Are you guys excited?” I asked, grinning.

“Very! A little nervous too, though. What about you?” Evalin said.

Idalia then added, “It should be an interesting day. Tomorrow is when I’ll be nervous. Or... I guess whenever we meet the prince.”

I nodded, agreeing with both of them.

“I'm definitely a little bit of both excited and nervous. But, you're right. Tomorrow is when things get really real.”

“True. Today is just makeovers and getting settled in, right?” Evalin commented, wincing slightly as if she was embarrassed she didn’t know. “Sorry, this whole thing has been a bit of a whirlwind. It’s kind of hard to keep track of all the details.”

She didn’t need to feel bad. The only reason I knew is because I had studied the schedule like a call sheet.

“Yeah, I think so,” I supplied. “I'm sure there will be people telling us what to do, and where to go. I wouldn't worry too much.”

In a way, I realized that this Selection wouldn’t be all that different from a film set. There would almost always be a plan, a place for us to go, expectations to be met, and a hierarchy to listen to.

“It’s kind of weird, being thrown into the spotlight like this!” Evalin pointed out. “Do any of you know any of the other girls? I’ve only gotten tidbits of information that my sister has dug up.”

I did know one of the girls. Emily Rose White. She had acted in a couple of my movies. She was really sweet, and I wondered when I would see her when we got to Angeles.

“Yeah, I just know the details because I have a friend obsessed with this stuff. She sent me a PowerPoint of ‘the most important things to know’ on everything and everyone,” Idalia said.

“I know one of the girls, Emily. She's acted in a few of my movies. And I know some of the other actors just from the industry talk and stuff,” I admitted. “A Powerpoint? That's iconic.”

It was. I found it highly amusing, and I couldn’t help but smirk at the idea.

“Oh wow!” Evalin responded, laughing nervously. “Dare I ask what it said about us?”

“Oh, Evalin... never read the reviews,” I joked, chuckling softly.

Though, I’m not sure Evalin understood I was joking because her face flushed, and she laughed nervously as she said, “Ah sorry! I’m used to my work being peer-reviewed.”

Idalia laughed slightly at the interaction before stepping in and looking at me. “She is iconic like that. She liked your last by the way. It was in her PowerPoint.”

“Oh, really? That's sweet!” I responded. Though, it was probably hypocritical considering the joke I just told.

It was just nice to know that people didn’t hate my movies.

“I’m pretty sure your slide just said, ‘bio smart but I have no idea what any of her work says,’” Idalia continued, looking at Evalin.

Evalin blushed even more. “Ah, I haven’t really done anything of note. I held a research position under my genetics professor last semester, but it was mostly just me using a microscope.”

That sounded so cool, I thought. So important. Evalin must be really smart.

“That sounds way more intelligent than anything I've done so... kudos to you,” I applauded her.

She was so shy about her work. I wanted her to know she should be proud of it.

“What movies have you directed?” she asked, suddenly turning the conversation around to me.

I blanked for a moment, feeling like a fool, who forgot her own movies.

My brain came back, and I was left listing off a few of my works. “Uh... a few. Some of them you might know are Lady Bird and Little Women. I've also done The Greatest Showman. But, I also direct episodes of TV series sometimes.”

Evalin’s face lit up. “Oh, I loved Little Women! That and Pride and Prejudice are the two movies my sister insists we watch whenever we have a family movie night!”

My heart warmed. To think, my movie, was being played next to the Pride and Prejudice.

I grinned, responding, “Pride and Prejudice is amazing. I'm glad my movie sits along beside it at your family movie nights.”

Idalia returned to the conversation with, “Funny. My house is usually filled with suggestions of Megamind on family night.”

I also gasped out loud, laughing, but I contained it with an amused smiling, responding sarcastically. “Hey, I mean, Megamind... important stuff.”

Evalin asked, “Do you have a lot of siblings, too?”

I replied easily, “No, actually. I don't have any siblings. You?”

I looked to both Evalin and Idalia.

With an amused smile, Idalia said, “I only have a younger brother but Megamind is usually not his idea.” 

I laughed, responding the again sarcastically, “Like I said, Megamind... important stuff.”

“I probably tease him more than he teases me,” Idalia said.

I chuckled again along with Evalin, who said, “I have 3 brothers and a sister. Megamind is a classic.”

Megamind… Megamind was something for sure. I hadn’t seen it in forever, and it was probably on once. 

Instead, I thought more about her four siblings. I couldn’t imagine having even one sibling, let alone four.

“A big family! That must be nice,” I said.

“It is, for the most part, but we can get a little antsy,” Evalin explained. “There’s plenty of teasing and pranks to go around! Having time to yourself must be nice, though!”

I smiled again. 

“Can be. But, at least I get to live vicariously through my characters,” I added whimsically. “Oh, hey, Idalia, we never asked what your profession was. You seem like a prankster, it has to be something interesting.”

She grinned, leaning back in her seat. “Interesting assumption. I fence sabre. Or saber if you want.”

Fencing? Also very cool.

Evalin must’ve also thought it was cool because her eyes lit up and she and Idalia went back and forth for a little. 

“Oh wow, that’s awesome! I thought your name sounded kind of familiar! You fenced in the Olympics, right? My youngest brother had the games on 24/7 when they were being broadcasted!” Evalin said.

At the mention of the Olympics, Idalia brightened. “I did. I’m going again next year. Or at least that’s the plan.”

“Ah, congratulations!” Evalin exclaimed, but then bit her lip nervously. “Are you nervous about the possibility of this selection taking over a year? I know the officials said it shouldn’t, since it should display the Prince’s decisiveness, but I have to wonder how into the Selection he’s going to be, what with his engagement to Evie Waldia being cut off so recently.”

Idalia takes a moment to take that in a looks up at the ceiling, “Time will tell. But I doubt they will say I can’t go. Illéa, like everyone else, sends people that can win. If I‘m still one of the candidates when the time comes, it would be foolish of them to deny my participation.”

So, she was confident then. I didn’t mind that. In fact, I sort of admired it. But, too much confidence can get you into bad places, from what I had seen in the film industry at least. I silently hoped she would be careful.

“That’s true,” Evalin said with a sigh. “It must be so cool, being able to compete for your country like that!”

Finally, I chipped into the conversation. “That really is cool, Idalia. I'm sure you'll get to go. It's probably even better press for Illéa if they send a Selected.”

Evalin nodded, agreeing with me. “That’s a good point! You’d get to be serving the nation in two ways at once!”

Idalia chucked. “I guess that could be said. So we got a film director, bio major, fencer and…,” she trailed off, looking over at Shala. “An unknown.”

Shala was still looking out the window.

I leaned in closer to Evalin and Idalia while looking over at Shala with a slide glance. “Should...should we try to talk to her...or?”

“Shala?” Evalin tried to call out to her. When Shala didn’t respond, Evalin frowned and turned back around. “Maybe she’s just very nervous.”

“Yeah, probably...”

More time passed, and we continued to talking to each other for the whole trip.

I shrugged. “Well, anyway, you girls seem really nice. It's definitely made me feel a lot better about this whole process.”

I truly was happy that this entire conversation had gone well so far. I had no idea if the girls would be at each other’s throats, but these two, Evalin and Idalia, seemed really sweet.

“Likewise,” Evalin responded, smiling. “It’s good to know that we’re not in this alone.”

I nodded and Idalia said, “I’m sure Prince Arin must be having a similar feeling.”

I nodded again, and then grinned, leaning forward.

“Speaking of Prince Arin... thoughts?”

Evalin blushed, “Well, he is quite handsome, don’t you think?”

I smiled, sitting back in my seat. 

“He is quite handsome,” I agreed. “I'm excited to get to know him. Or, at least I hope I get a chance to know him.”

Evalin nodded, “Me too. I’d love to be able to talk to him and get to know him. I’m sure he has lots of interesting stories to tell.”

“Yeah probably. It's just crazy that we are going to be living in the palace of all places,” I said excitedly. “Hanging out with the Prince of all people. Feels like a fever dream.”

Honestly, I felt like I was living in a fairytale. But, then again, I had felt like that for a long time.

“Truly! I never imagined that this is where life would actually take me!” Evalin said, looking out the window. “It looks like we’re about to land!”

I nodded, looking out my own window. We were just barely starting to descend. The city of Angeles glimmered below, a city I was familiar with. A city I lived in most of the time. I had missed it, and it definitely would be weird to not head back to my house, but instead, to the palace.

“Yep. We should keep in touch down there. I think it'll be nice to have some friendly faces around,” I added, trying to come off as genuine.

Because I was, I just wanted to make sure they knew I was.

“Certainly!” both Evalin and Idalia agreed.

We continued to talk as the plane descended, speaking mostly about room arrangements. I was sad to find out that Idalia and Evalin were in the same hall, and I was in another, but I tried to stay positive. That would just mean a better chance of getting to know more people.

“I’ve heard there’s a woman’s room. And also the etiquette lessons,” Idalia said, as we talked about how we would see each other around.

“True! I’m kind of excited for the etiquette lessons. It’ll be nice to learn something different,” Evalin explained.

“Oh it’ll be something for sure,” Idalia responded, clearly amused. “How to be photographed, how to curtsy! Maybe which spoon is for the salad as well.”

I laughed a little, but warned, “Trust me, that’s not the hard stuff. It’s the learning to talk to the press that’s hard.”

That, I definitely knew. After all, I had been given etiquette lessons before-- right after my short film had taken off and I got sponsored to go to a school for threes. And then, my film career had taken off, and I had to learn how to do interviews and walk red carpets and how to be a proper two.

It was exhausting, but I was thankful for it.

“I wonder if they’ll make us learn how to walk with books balanced on our heads,” Evalin added.

I laughed, picturing it in my head. Evalin and Idalia were pretty funny.

“That would be funny to see,” I said.

Not long after that, the plane landed. We were escorted off, and into a limousine. We didn’t talk much during the ride, each of excited and nervous about what lay ahead of us.

As for me, I was happy to be back in Angeles and ready to try my chance at change and love.

[mentions: @evalinkatrineberg​ , @idaliamoretti​ , @emily-rose-white​ ]

[sunflowercherrypeaches]

Buckle up it's rant time

Reddit used to be my go to for Harry Styles content before I discovered this place, y'know, just over there it's just discussions about the albums, which songs we like best, occasional fan art and photos of him etc. Yesterday I posted the birthday cake my partner and children made me to here and to the Harry subreddit. It was tongue in cheek, my partner is not keen at all on Harry's music, and jokingly teases me because it's the first time in years I've been this into a fandom. Emphasis on joking, we both understand that I love his music, and other than that this is just a silly celebrity crush. Everyone has them, it doesn't affect our relationship (10 years, two kids, going strong, we have our moments but generally it's great) in any way. If anything it's improved it because thanks to Harry, his music and his whole ethos, and honestly to you guys on here as well, I've become a more open person, more comfortable in my own skin, more confident.

My kids know I like Harry's music, they talked about what kind of birthday cake I would like, my three year old daughter suggested Peppa pig because that's her favourite, but they decided I'd prefer Harry. It was cute and it was a nice gesture and honestly a bit of an in joke, hence the baby Harries all over it (I started kicking Harry last November, wasn't a baby Harry kind of girl).

Anyway, I know there's a lot of gross subreddits out there, I've never really interacted or engaged with them, I've definitely never been dragged by them, until yesterday. Someone came across my cake post and posted it to r/consumeproduct. 

Take a look at their wonderful comments: 

Comments like 'Degenerate is probably a homosexual' just SHOWS you what kind of people these are. To imply that anyone gay is a degenerate is just disgusting bigotry, and to not understand that people of any sexual orientation can refer to their significant other as their partner… is just dumb as fuck. Partner… we've been together 10 years, we have two children together, boyfriend doesn't really cut it but we're not engaged or married so husband isn't right either. Is partner a British thing? Does it mean something else in other nations? What?

Apparently he's a cuck and a simp for allowing me to have a celebrity crush. Or maaaaybe we're just secure enough in our relationship that we know that celebrity crushes don't mean anything. Yes I spend some of my free time reblogging Harry content, I guess if you just look at my Tumblr or Reddit you might assume it's all-consuming but it's not. People have lives outside of these websites. I like a lot of things that are not Harry Styles. The fact that I choose to use this site or that site solely based on that topic does not negate the rest of my hobbies or life. The fact that I draw his face and share the picture doesn't mean I don't draw anything else. The fact that I listen to his music and discuss it, does not mean I don't ever listen to anything else. It just means there's a community of people in that place that I like sharing and discussing that particular thing with. There are other communities that I share other things with. Me being a bit self aware and making jokes about being obsessed or being enabled, doesn't mean I'm actually obsessed or being enabled. 

But really, I couldn't care less about them dragging me for fancying a celebrity. We like and look up to people we respect. I have literally no qualms about fancying Harry fucking Styles. I couldn't really care less about them dragging me for any of it, I actually think it's hilarious reading their assumptions about my life based off a picture of cake.

What bothers me is the whole subreddit. It's gone past the point of mocking consumerism and now just mocks people for enjoying literally anything. You want to own a nice house one day? Fuck you consumer bitch. You like music, movies, pop culture of any kind? Fuck you consumer bitch. You like recording yourself playing guitar and posting it for others to see? Fuck you musical consumer bitch. You like porn? Super fuck you consumer bitch. You like a toothbrush with a rainbow on it? Fuck you LGBT+ consumer bitch. 

These are ACTUAL things they are dragging people for. 

Why are people so filled with hate that they can't even stand that other people enjoy things? What kind of lives do they live that they apparently like nothing other than spouting hate about the things other people LIKE? Simply things that other people get enjoyment from. It's completely laughable.

I feel bad for them that they feel so superior that they apparently can't get any enjoyment from music, books, movies...

Sure consumerism and capitalism are bad but not everything we consume is bad. People discussing and sharing their favourite artists, characters, things you hope to have or achieve etc isn't the same as tweeting about how much you love that big brand of cola. But also if you love that big brand of cola, you do you. People are allowed to like what they like. Sure, you're allowed an opinion of that if you really need to have one, but why? What do you gain from shitting on things that others enjoy? 

I can't say this loud enough, but:

TPWK

[quokkalatte]

Mixtape pt.5 [M.YG]

Part 5

Category: One-shot series

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Female! Reader

Summary: Living as an aspiring rap artist in Seoul, all you want to do is work on your music and try to get your name out there. Of course when you have someone as annoying and spiteful as Min Yoongi makes that extremely difficult. Until he decides to help you out.

Warnings: smut, language, some Namjoon action (which ofc is a warning cause oof), angry Yoongi, alcohol consumption, perhaps some angst but not really

Warnings for this chapter: alcohol consumption, language, Tae being a bit of a horndog in the beginning

Author's Note: ofc this is late again but I hope you enjoy this chapter! It's also short, contrary to what I promised last time I apologize. I promise it'll get more interesting in the future ;)

Tags; @notsolovelykarsyn @psychoticshawtyy

Could not be tagged: @deesixx2801

[Message me to be added to the Tag list so you can be tagged for future updates]

× × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × × ×

I hurried down the street, pulling my jacket close to my body, trying be to hold any remains of warmth I'd had since leaving my apartment. Seoul was covered in a thick layer of snow, the roads icy and slick and bundles of oil-based slush was built on either side of the road. People still continued on without a care in the world. It made me regret not getting a taxi or asking Jungkook to pick me up.

I shivered, turning the corner quickly and let out a sigh of relief when I saw the record store. It wasn't far from my apartment, but the cold made it a bitch to get too. I quickly pushed the door open, hearing the bell signal my arrival. I let out a loud groan when I felt the heat rush upon me, swathing me in warmth.

"Damn I haven't even touched you yet and you're already sounding like that" my eyes dart towards a figure leaning against the counter, shuffling through a magazine. His hair was tousled and messy and his cheeks flushed from the cold outside. Taehyung grinned when I rolled my eyes

"You wish" I walk past him and Taehyung chuckles

"I do. Isn't your little study group today?"

"Yes that's where I'm going" I say and Taehyung perks up immensely

"Hey you should ask if they'll let me help with the next Cypher. I've been asking but they never let me"

"And what makes you think they'll change their mind this time?" I raise my eyebrows just as Jimin came in from the back. His face split into a smile upon seeing me and he ruffled Taehyung's hair as he passed. Taehyung swatted at his hand.

"Wishful thinking?"

"Keep wishing then Tae. Maybe someday" I pat his cheek and he sticks his upper lip out and I laugh. I hop over the counter, much to Jimin's chargin, and quickly hurry up the steps. I heard the chatter of voices, and the room came into view. It was like Deja Vu all over again when the boys saw me. They immediately started their jeering.

"Well well well. I'd like to say I'm surprised, but I'm not" Jungkook teased. I rolled my eyes, throwing my bag at him it landed on his lap and he let out a grunt at the impact.

"May I ask why you're late?" Namjoon asks.

"Ice is slick Joon, and I didn't want to fall over. Excuse me for taking percaution" I roll my eyes, plopping next to Hoseok, who immediately threw his arm around me.

"Were glad you made it sunshine" Hoseok grins and I laugh. The only one who hadn't said anything was Yoongi, which was typical. Ever since he left abruptly nearly a month ago, we barely spoke. I'd asked him if Jin was okay, and he only replied with a 'Yes' and that was it. He never made more plans, never answered texts, and the past two meet ups he rarely spoke to me and it annoyed me to no end. I wanted to talk to him, ask him what the hell happened in my kitchen. It was like he was about to kiss me, and then he didn't. And now he was pretending like I didn't exist. It kind of hurt to be honest.

"Show us what you got. You said you finally added music to it" Hoseok says, bringing me out of my daze. I blink, and nod

"Yeah, yeah I did."I say, digging out my laptop, nervously setting it on the coffee table. The song was finally nearly developed. The rap was swift and sorrowful, the music paced to fit it exactly. I was just nervous how the boys would take it. They'd only read the lyrics, now it was fully recorded and ready for listening. I brought up the demo, pressing play and sitting back, nervously figetting the entire time. All three were silent as the rap filled the air, the music complimenting it nicely. It sounded upbeat to a nom-korean speaker, but the lyrics were of unrequited love, developed into harsh bitterness and deciding that it wasn't worth the pain, to get over it and move on. The last part wasn't fully true, I added it for some closure to the song but in reality I was nowhere near over Yoongi, even though he seemed he wanted nothing to do with me. The song ended, and Namjoon nodded, rubbing his hands together.

"It's amazing Y/n" he grins, and I sighed in relief. Hoseok and Jungkook eagerly agree.

"Of course you found a way to make the music compliment the lyrics. You're a genius" Hoseok says and I blush at the compliment "It's really sad Noona, but relatable" Jungkook comments. I thank all three of them, and subconsciously glance at Yoongi's silent form. Namjoon was the one who acted out.

"Yoongi?" He prompts the blonde. Yoongi glanced from the screen to me, and my heart clenched as I waited for his harsh critique. He always did that with our songs, pointing out the flaws while the rest gave good comments. He was the Simon Cowell of our group. But he didn't, he merely nodded his head

"It's good" Yoongi says, and that was it. The three of us were speechless, Jungkook's jaw was dropped and he looked at me with awe.

"You got hyung to compliment you Noona. You must be a goddess" he says, and I blush, shaking my head.

"Stop Kook while you're behind" I warn and he sticks out his tongue. I quickly shut my laptop and shoved into my bag. It was quiet for a couple of seconds, and then Namjoon cleared his throat.

"Okay, I guess now's a good time as any to announce this" he says, his tone nervous. "But last week I went over to another producing company and submitted my tape....and it got accepted" I gasped and the other three boys shouted and whooped. Jungkook threw his arm around Namjoon's shoulders and hugged him tightly. Namjoon grinned bashfully as we all hugged and congratulated him. His dimples were prominent and his cheeks flushed.

"That's great Joon I'm so proud" I say and he laughs, running a hand through his hair.

"Thanks guys" he mumbles.

"We should go out and celebrate that's great!" Jungkook says, and we all nod.

"Well, Jin wanted to throw a party this Saturday...." Namjoon trailed off. "So of course to guys are invited"

"We should get drinks though" Jungkook says "I'll drive"

"Not happening" Yoongi wrinkled his nose "the last time you drove is anywhere we ended up in a ditch"

"I didn't see the squirrel!" Jungkook wailed "And I've gotten better hyung you shouldn't lord that over me you're no better at driving" Jungkook pouts.

"I'll drive" Jimin leans in the doorway, keys dangling from his finger.

Half an hour later we all were sitting around a table, celebrating Namjoon's sucess. He was flushed and blushing, and kept saying how lucky he felt. Taehyung had accompanied us, always eager for free alcohol and food.

Everyone was laughing and enjoying themselves. Hoseok continues to congratulate Namjoon, who's face was flushed and became redder the more he drank. Jimin and Jungkook disappeared hours ago, and Yoongi seemed to be missing as well. After the 6th shot I was fuzzy and lightheaded, and wandered outside to breathe. The cool air immediately hit my skin and my eyes closed and I let out a sigh of relief. The music from the bar was faint outside, absorbed by the air and contained by the building.

"You really can't handle liquor can't you?" A voice said, and I turned to see Yoongi leaning against the side of the bar. His dark eyes were a light with amusement and I roll my eyes.

"I can handle it just fine"

"Please, three shots and your rolling on the floor" he snorts.

"Fuck off Yoongi I was actually in a good mood" I grumble, rubbing my forehead. Yoongi snickered,

"Sorry. Didn't mean to ruin your fun' he says. I glare at him. "What?"

"You're infuriating" you growl at him. He frowns, blinking in confusion.

"What're you talking about?" I stalk towards him, and take a step back, eyeing me warily.

"You. Are. Infuriating. Min Yoongi" each word was expressed with a poke to his sternum, and he watched with a dumb expression on his face, which expressed he had obviously had a few to drink.

"I was just teasing Y/n calm down" he rubs his chest sorely.

"Not about that!" I hiss.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Hoe about you ignoring me for the past month? How about you leaving me alone in my apartment to rescue Jin? Or how about the fact you were about to kiss me?" The questions fell from my mouth before I could stop them. The shots betraying me to Yoongi, who's eyes comically widened with each one. I was shaking, glaring at him to answer my questions. He went silent, reserving himself.

"That was a mistake" he mumbles

"What was?" I instigate further. He ran a hand through his hair, tugging at the ends and he wouldn't meet my eyes.

"Trying to kiss you. I shouldn't have tried that." Hurt shot through my chest at his confession, even if I asked him for the truth. It stung. He could tell, It's must have displayed on my features. He took a step towards me, guilt covering his face but I glared and took a step back.

"Well I'm sorry I'm such a mistake then" I hiss, turning to walk back into the bar. A hand wrapped around my wrist tightly and I was stopped in my place.

"Y/n wait- it's not like that. Please listen" Yoongi said, and it shocked me because it was almost like he was begging me. I turned to glower at him, tugging my hand from his grip, but I didn't move. Yoongi sighed, his head bent towards the ground and refusing to meet my eyes. "I don't think you're a mistake. You twisted my words, as you always do-"

"Watch it" I growl warningly

"-but I didn't kiss you because I didn't think you wanted me to" He finished without pause. I gave him a dumbfounded look.

"Wait, what?" Yoongi groaned, tugging at the ends of his hair and scowled at me like it was my fault he was so cryptic.

"I didn't think you wanted me to kiss you. I thought you didn't like me, and I figured there was someone else."

"What makes you think there was someone else?" I questioned angrily, folding my arms

"Your song" Yoongi says. This made me laugh. The alcohol in my system had me buzzing and I could feel it. It was Yoongi's turn to be angry at me. "Why are you laughing?" He demanded.

"What does my song have to do with me being with someone else Yoongi? It's about being rejected from someone and unreciprocated love."

"The ending is about getting over them" he says and I shook my head

"I added that part. I never got over him" I say sadly, knowing I'd regret admitting that when I woke up the next morning.

"So there is someone. See? That's why I didn't kiss you. You're still hung up over some jerk who's too stupid to notice your interest in him" Yoongi says. I was quiet, my eyes on the ground. Then I spoke softly

"It's you"

"What?" Yoongi frowned, not catching my words

"You. The song's about you" I mumble. He stared at me, his eyes beginning to widen. I could see his thoughts multiplying, forming the words of my song to fit with how he'd treated me so coldly when I just wanted his affection.Yoongi's heart thudded in his chest, all color drained from his body. He shook his head, and backed away

"No. Not possible" he mumbled

"Why not?" I demanded, but he shook his head again. Yoongi backed farther away when I approached him.

"No" He hisses, his voice suddenly full of venom and spite. I stepped back, shocked. Yoongi turned away, walking quickly down the street until he was out of sight. I watched the spot where he dissappeared. Rejection and hurt being my only voiced emotions. That's where Namjoon and the others found me, outside and crying. Their happy uplifted moods suddenly dropped upon seeing my tear streaked face. They tried prying my reason for crying out of me, but I refused to speak.

"Just please take me home" I mumble. Namjoon called Seokjin, who was in the midst of sleeping and scolded Namjoon for being out late, but agreed to come pick us up. 10 minutes later we were piled into his car and being driven home. He frowned when he noticed we were one short.

"Where's Yoongi?" He asks. All eyes turned on me, I was the only one who last saw him. I stared out the window solemnly, resentment boiling my veins.

"He can be in hell for all I care" I grunt out, and the car fell into since once more.