#yes he is the only cookie with non-animal ears

[eggnogs-stupid-ideas]

im gonna post my next christmas guy

here

Hes based on a fucking elf of the shelf /srs

Hes a social media influencer, hes a very chill guy and people are constantly confused about his ears

also he can teleport but only when people aren't looking. And hw can't be touched or else he looses the ability.

He's not their child but hes under claus and frost roof.

[jishyucks]

Dollarstore Mistletoe ‣ ljn

‣ genre: fluff, friends-to-lovers, female reader

‣ wc: 2.7k

‣ summary: Jeno looked up at the mistletoe then at you, cheeks heating up from the situation. So that’s why Hyuck had mistletoe. 

this was going to be a short blurb but sike... enjoy!

-

You sat at the corner of the room, eyes drawn nervously at Donghyuck who was holding a tied up bunch of mistletoe in his hand. Though he was tossing it to himself, you could already read his mind from across the room. He had a sly smirk on his face as he glanced between you and Jeno who chose to sit between Jisung and Chenle.

Donghyuck, I fucking swear. You texted him, eyes growing wide in a subtle warning once he looked back up at you. 

He laughed out loud before texting you back, I’m not doing anything.

Not rn but ur going to.

He loved going over to your place just to tease you about your (apparent) undying love for Jeno, constantly pushing you to make a move because Jeno was a ‘giant wuss’ and ‘would not grow balls to do so himself’ while you ‘had potential’. And honestly, you weren’t sure what to believe when it came to Donghyuck. He was a trickster. Who knew if he was lying this time or not. 

You could easily recall maybe a week back when you were hanging out with this pest of a boy. He had been spontaneously mustering up a plan to get you and Jeno to kiss underneath some fake mistletoe he could find at the dollar store, which could then lead to confessing. 

“Please don’t. We’re not living in some rom-com, Hyuck,” you glared at him, hoping that his ridiculous plan would be thrown out the window, “It’s not going to happen.” There was not a single bone in your body confident enough to kiss the boy you’ve held the longest crush on. Donghyuck was wrong when he said you had potential, meaning he could be wrong when it came to this plan he barely put effort into arranging.

“I know,” he replied simply, “But shit like this is inevitable.  Plus you’re forgetting that I have the brain of a mastermind.” You ignored the way he wiggled his eyebrows in an attempt to persuade you, obviously failing. He knew he had to do everything himself, whether you liked it or not. Besides, he knew things you didn’t. He knew these plans were going to work. 

So now, here he sat at Jeno’s house, waiting for the perfect time to dangle the plant above you both. He already knows you had the capability to run if you saw him move even an inch towards you. You were probably as alert as those animals being preyed on on National Geographic, ears perked and everything. Your fight or flight response was already activated just because of him. 

As for Jeno, he was probably the complete opposite of you. He was leaning back on the couch with a delicate looking smile sitting on his face. Donghyuck was glad that he didn’t have a single clue about what was going on. But also... did he ever know what was going on?

A Christmas movie was playing on the TV even though barely anyone was paying any attention to it. Jaemin and Renjun were in the kitchen baking gingerbread cookies, following a recipe they found tiktok, while Jisung and Chenle were playing the nth game of PubG on their phones. Mark and Jeno were probably the only ones paying attention to the film, occasionally letting out a snort or giggle at a cheesy joke being delivered. Then there was you and Donghyuck, the only two aware of the plan that you didn’t even want to take part in. 

“Why are you holding weed?” Jisung finally lifts his head from his phone’s screen, brows furrowed at the mistletoe in Donghyuck’s hands. He pointed slightly towards them, arm falling to his side soon after. 

The older boy gave Jisung an unreadable look, “It’s not weed. It’s mistletoe.” Again, he tossed it up, barely grazing the popcorn ceiling before catching it. 

“Ohh~ like that Justin Bieber song!” Jisung pointed out. His attention was soon directed back to his phone, probably beginning another game alongside Chenle. Jeno glanced at the younger boy and just shook his head in adoration and slight genuine confusion. It seemed like he literally had no idea, no clue, why Donghyuck was holding mistletoe. This, again, was good news to Donghyuck. 

“Cookies!” Jaemin barged into the living room dressed in a holiday apron and oven mitts. He had flour sprinkled along his chest and collar bone, probably thrown on there by Renjun, who followed closely behind him. 

Like young kids, attention spans were cut off and brought towards the gingerbread cookies, its aroma soon flooding the room. Through the pride that Jaemin gave off while standing there, you already knew the cookies were good. Especially with the help of Renjun.

Ditching your tense position, you had completely forgotten of your silent duel with Donghyuck, hopping up from the couch and skipping over to Jaemin. The others followed you shortly, Jeno being the second there. 

Donghyuck pushed himself off the couch last, still playing with the mistletoe between his fingertips. Once spotting you standing directly next to Jeno, he stopped himself from audibly gasping and darted towards you both, holding up his arm above the space between the two of you, “Ah! Mistletoe~” 

Your heart dropped, hand physically letting go of the cookie. It plopped back onto the tray as you spun around to face Donghyuck and then to an equally thrown off Jeno. You wanted to beat yourself up for letting your guard down for cookies. 

Jeno looked up at the mistletoe then at you, cheeks heating up from the situation. So that’s why Hyuck had mistletoe. The math was mathing. 

Jeno took in what was happening. Even if it was so sudden, Jeno didn’t feel like resisting. Instead he stood there and tried to read the non-verbal cues you were showing, trying to figure out whether or not you would want to carry out this unexplained tradition. Your face seemed to express no emotion, though he figured you were deep in thought, trying to process what was happening. And that was exactly what you were doing.

“I told you not to,” you mumbled towards Donghyuck’s direction. The looks you were sending Donghyuck could be used as weapons in some other dimension, but in this one the most you could do was intimidate the boy. In a brief state of panic, assuming Jeno found this situation weird, you tried to leave the situation, avoiding Jeno’s gaze as you did.

“It’s tradition!” Donghyuck attempted to pull you back. He was trying to be Christmas Cupid, knowing that feelings were being exchanged without the other’s knowledge. He thought he’d be helping.

Jeno shook his head, “N-no, Hyuck, it’s fine… if Y/N doesn’t want to do it, we can’t force her.” He felt himself gulp, mostly from the subtle rejection he’d received, before quickly reaching for a cookie and fleeing the scene. 

Donghyuck turns to you, arm dropping to his side and mouth wide open, “He was going to kiss you!” 

For a second, you doubted Donghyuck, shaking your head. But then at the realization that Jeno had left the room in a rather disappointed state, you probably were wrong and for once, Donghyuck was right. But there was no way you were admitting that in his presence. 

It would’ve been completely silent if it wasn’t for the movie playing in the background. Everyone was still trying to process what had just happened, while you were still staring Donghyuck down. 

“Are you blaming me?” You gestured to yourself. Sure it could have actually been your fault but that really wasn’t good for your degrading self-esteem right now. 

“Yes,” Donghyuck threw the fake mistletoe onto the three seater couch, “It looked like you didn’t want to kiss the boy. You basically stomped on his heart.” Sure Donghyuck was over exaggerating but knowing how much Jeno liked you, you probably did. 

“No I didn’t,” you try to deny everything, not wanting your hopes to be crushed by false information and beliefs. 

“You did,” Mark butted in, “He looked like a kicked puppy.” You shifted your gaze from Donghyuck to Mark, someone who you could trust a bit more, and felt your frown deepen. Feeling yourself stumble back in the slightest bit, you glance at the stairs where Jeno had gone, probably to his room. Should you talk to him? 

“Just go talk to him,” Jaemin pushed on, as if he could read what you were thinking, “But take an extra cookie with you.” He held the tray of baked goods in front of you and you complied, slithering past Mark, Renjun, and Chenle before going up the stairs. 

You had no idea what you were going to tell Jeno. That you wanted to kiss him? That would come off as weird. 

The pair of cookies in your hands could be your conversation starter.

Upon reaching his door, you raise a fist to knock. 

If it was possible, Jeno would slap himself so many times just so he could knock some sense into himself. He was sitting at the edge of his bed with his palm to his forehead, feeling like an entire circus. Why the hell didn’t he even act like he was weirded out by Donghyuck and that fucking mistletoe? Why did he act like he was waiting for a long time for that opportunity to kiss you? 

Maybe because he was. But he should’ve at least pretended like he wasn’t.

Jeno threw himself back into his bed, blinking at the ceiling while he mentally attacked himself for being so foolish. How would he recover from this? He shouldn’t have ran out of the room like that. It made him so obvious. It gave away the feelings he hoped he had been hiding well the entire time. 

Jeno you’re so fucking stupid, he thought, teeth gritting. 

He clenched his fist and started to hit the middle of his forehead lightly with his knuckles, startled when he heard a loud knocking sound. 

Was that my forehead or was that the door?

Sitting up, he pivoted his head so that he was facing the door, brows furrowed as he waited for another indication that the sound was (hopefully) the door and not his skull. 

“Jeno, it’s me.” Your voice was muffled and your shadow could be seen through the bottom. 

For a second, Jeno hesitated, unsure if he was ready to face you at that moment, but he soon decided against it, standing up and towards his bedroom door in order to let you in. Opening it just a crack, he peeked out, seeing your shorter figure staring up at him, eyes slightly unreadable, “I brought cookies.”

Jeno couldn’t help but feel his chest warm up at the sight of you. He held back a smile to keep himself grounded. Pulling the door to create a wider opening, he let you in.

“Are you okay?” You knew he wasn’t okay. Just by the look in Jeno’s eyes, you could tell he had a lot going on in his head. You didn’t want to start the conversation off with ‘I actually wanted to kiss you too’ because in all honesty, anyone faced with that statement would be scared in one way or another, regardless of their feelings for the other. 

“I guess you can say that,” Jeno hummed and sat at the foot of his bed. You handed him one of the cookies and bit into the second one you brought. Jeno couldn’t even make eye contact with you. He was a smidge too embarrassed to do so. 

You sat next to him, the heat of your bodies bouncing off of each other from how close you were, “What do you mean?” You were drawing the conversation out while you still tried to run through what you were gonna say as your version of a confession. 

He shrugged, taking a small bite, almost a nibble, from the cookie, “I know you’re not stupid, Y/N… Donghyuck was painfully obvious and so was I.” Feeling his heart pick up its pace scared him. This only meant he could either lose total control of his words, or just not speak at all. He focused on keeping them tame, “I’m sorry you had to witness that. Just forget it happened, okay? Sometimes, Donghyuck doesn’t know he’s going overboard.” 

Jeno spoke softly, head dipping down and bangs falling over his eyes. The glasses he wore slipped down his nose as he did, but he quickly caught them with the tip of his index finger. 

“Donghyuck doesn’t normally pull shit like that unless he has to,” you say as a reply, “He somehow always knows things we don’t.” You hoped Jeno got the hint from what you were saying, but by the way he kept his attention at the cooling gingerbread cookie in his hand as he nodded, you knew that he was completely clueless. Were you being too subtle?

“Do you know why he decided to buy that plastic plant in the first place?” You took a bite from Jaemin’s cookie and swung your legs. 

Jeno shrugged again, “Because he’s Donghyuck?”

 You both let out brief chuckles but you regained your composure and sighed. From downstairs, you hear the others laughing at something, some background noise from the near silence in the room.

“Because he knows how I feel.” 

Jeno’s ears perked up at this statement, still afraid to look at you. He shifted in place, “How you feel?”

You rolled your eyes at Jeno, hitting him playfully, “Lee Jeno!” Yeah, you did want to drag the conversation in the first place, but it was getting too long. You wanted to get to the point and Jeno wasn’t taking any of the hints you were throwing. 

“What?” He whined, acting as if you hit him hard when everyone knows he’s got the muscle to resist that pain. This familiar feeling between the two of you, the wave of comfort he felt, caused him to turn towards you. Once he realized what he had done, he turned away quickly, feeling himself grow timid once again. 

“I know you’re not that stupid either, Jeno. Can you please look at me?” To no surprise he doesn’t listen. He was getting all flustered. The shy, blushy type of flustered. 

Lifting your hand up to his face, you grabbed it softly and turned it so that he was facing you. He complied, letting you turn his head, only, his eyes were shut tightly. 

You huffed, “Jeno! Please open your eyes.” He shook his head while his face was still being held with your hand, “Please?” 

Again, he refused, this giving you permission to attempt to pry his eyelids with your own fingers. Though you gave up quite quickly. You didn't want to force them open as any sort of mishap was bound to happen. 

“Last chance to open your eyes,” you warned, only he didn’t know what you were warning him about. He still kept them closed, feeling comfortable in this position he was in now, “Fine, Jeno, if you don’t open your eyes, then I will…”

“You will what?” He smirked. Though you couldn’t see his eyes, you could see his emotion through his raised brow. Deep down he knew what you were about to do. But he wanted to sit back and wait for it to happen. 

Without thinking, you leaned in and brought his lips down to yours. At first there wasn’t any response from Jeno, but once he had finally processed what was going on, his eyes shot open, and as if it was some sort of instinct, he kissed back. 

You liked this feeling. Maybe you would’ve felt it sooner if you hadn’t refused to kiss him earlier. But also you liked it how it was right now, and Jeno felt the same. Private, without any of the others watching. And it wasn’t because you had to follow a tradition, it was because you both wanted to do it.

After a few more long seconds, you both pulled away, beaming shyly at each other. You finally let go of his face and sat yourself back. 

“What was…?” Jeno was at a loss of words. 

You laughed softly, almost coming out as a giggle, “That’s how I feel.” 

Maybe Donghyuck was right when said you had that sort of potential. 

[1littleshippergirl1]

Something Odd

There was something odd about her neighbors.

Gladys Barlowe prided herself on knowing just about everything that went on within the bounds of the neighborhood. Why, Mrs. Keperna, who lived just down the road, was getting up there in age and yet none of her children made much of an effort to visit. But those girls had been a bad sort; they'd gotten into much trouble in their youth. She'd told Ingrid it was a bad idea to let them go out to that dancing club. It was bound to corrupt them and it did, rest assured.

Oh, and the Irmagards next door were having marriage troubles. Yes, indeed, it was quite a shocking revolution. She'd overheard shouting going on between them and glass shattering. Why, she had jumped a mile in the air when that happened! It was a toss up whether or not they would stay together or file for divorce. Privately, she'd said to the other ladies of the neighborhood came for a visit to sip on tea and enjoy some freshly baked biscuits, if it were her and her husband, they would never have been so inconsiderate to everyone else and aired their dirty laundry for all to hear. Had they no decency?

Her husband, Mervin, was less enthusiastic whenever she relayed anything she'd found out to him. Yes, Dear, he'd say. Or, mhm. Or, that's nice. She'd huff in frustration whenever that happened. So caught up in the sports section newspaper or television, he was! He had the nerve of wagging his finger at her once, insinuating her to be a gossip fiend. She was hardly such; they'd lived in the neighborhood ever since they'd gotten married, watched as people passed on, moved on and new faces appeared. They were one of the longest remaining home owners there. She had a right to know who was living nearby. Besides, what was the harm?

But, back to her neighbors.

She couldn't put her finger on it on what made them stand out to her. They didn't look that different than any of the other families that were around. It started out as a feeling, one she couldn't shove to the side and forget about, no matter how many times Marvin told her she was being paranoid. She wasn't. This was real, that feeling. She just knew it. She only had to prove it.

So, she did the reasonable thing and began to subtly watch them.

It was the house that was directly across the street from her, the one with the rather unflattering paint job and the red-headed man with his two daughters. They'd been there for about thirteen years now, back when it was originally just the man, his wife and only one of their children. She wondered whatever happened to that wife of his-Andria? Alana? Audrey, perhaps. Oh, yes, that must have been it. Gladys distinctly remembered a woman with blonde hair living in the house at one point and then she just disappeared! Their marriage must have soured. Poor thing. They were quite young, by the looks of it

(Marvin had told her it was none of her business when she'd planned on bringing over a casserole, with the intention of asking about it).

That woman, Audrey, was a little more cold then her husband was and the way she dressed was just plain awful. Those colors and her complexion-just what had she been thinking? Well, Gladys wasn't completely up to date on fashion these days either but still. Even she knew there were just certain things you kept in the back of your closet after turning thirty. She wasn't judging, of course.

Her husband, on the other hand, was much more friendly. Always smiling and waving to her when they happened to be outside at the same time. That wasn't an issue. She and the ladies from her book club agreed he was such a nice man. There were just occasions where she saw strange things; like that one time when she witnessed him throwing a cape over his shoulders when it snowed and a pointy hat, like a witch would wear.

It threw her for a bit of a loop, it did, at first. He might have been into that fad all the teenagers and young adults were into, where they dressed up as fictional people and used the convention center for all of them to get together. What a strange thing to do with one's time. Did he go to those events held at the local convention center, too? Oh, they were outrageously expensive, according to the flyers she'd seen posted on a bulletin board at the grocer's. Not to mention, he was raising two growing girls, who had needs that should've come before a silly hobby.

And speaking of his girls..

They were quite pretty. One of them, the oldest she reckoned, had taken right after her father. She was his spitting image, right down to the dreary clothes and atrocious looking glasses. The other was more so of her mother, appearance wise. She, too, wore glasses that were slightly big on her face and dressed without any fashion sense.

Like she said, they were pretty, but they could've looked magnificent if she just had a few minutes with them.

Those two weren't around very often, peculiarly enough. She saw them in the summertime and on occasion, if she looked out her window and if the curtains were open, they were home for Christmas but not any other time. That began shortly after they'd turned eleven. It started out as the oldest leaving and the younger one was still there but then it was both of them!

Just where did they go? Well, they weren't attending the local secondary school, that was for sure She'd casually asked Mrs. Thorp, who had a son going there, if she'd seen them around but they weren't there. That was odd. Unless they didn't go there because they were going to some exclusive school for gifted children. That must be it, wasn't it? What other explanation could there be? Truthfully, she never would've guessed those two would be prodigies. They never struck out to her like that. Weren't prodigies supposed to be all quiet and depressed? Those girls were rather lively from what she'd seen of them. Of course, they might just be an exception.

A thought crossed her mind and she wondered what the red-headed man did for a living. She hardly ever saw him leave the house. He didn't even have a car, for crying out loud! How did he get anywhere? Did he wake up in the early hours of the morning to walk back and forth to work? He couldn't have been poor; these houses cost a pretty penny. The few times she did see him, he wore casual, comfy clothes that gave no clue to his occupation, whatever that may be.

What if he was in some sort of governmental work that was highly confidential? Or perhaps he and his daughters were in the witness protection program! That made a great amount of sense. Why hadn't she considered that before? It might provide an explanation as to where that Audrey woman had gone. Oh, what if she'd been killed? Had she and the red-headed man gotten caught up in gang activity prior to the birth of their daughters and one of those members had found her and finished her off? Oh, the man must have been devastated! And now he was left to raise his girls on his own. What a terrible thing.

Didn't he have any family help? She was sure he did. She'd seen some red-headed folks in his living room once-she'd been outside watering her garden when a man standing in front of the window caught her attention. He was younger than the man who lived there by a few years and oh it was just awful, he was missing an ear! Her hand had flown up to her mouth, the hose dropping to the ground. What on earth had happened to him? A work related accident? An animal attack?

There were a couple non red-heads that came over to the house as well. A man with unkempt black hair had come around. He had the strangest looking scar, she'd noticed with curiosity as he stepped out of an old, beat up car. And then there were two separate women as well on occasion. One with hair that reminded Gladys of a rat's nest while the rest of her seemed well put together. The other had such nice hair. A cross between silver and blonde. It must have been from a box. It certainly didn't look natural. She'd assumed one of those women had to have been involved with the man. Why else would they have come to him? She dearly hoped he wasn't seeing them both at the same time. He wasn't that kind of man, was he? And to do that with children around. Very disgraceful if he was.

Gladys sat at the kitchen table of her home, sipping delicately on a cup of tea with slightly pursed lips. In all her years of knowing of the man, she had not yet once had a proper conversation with him. She didn't even know his name. And her curiosity was getting the better of her; she had several questions needing to be answered that couldn't be done by a simple, quick chat. No, she would need a reasonable reason to go over there.

She supposed she could bring over a late housewarming present. A batch of cookies, perhaps. Yes, that sounded splendid. The children would enjoy them and she could get the man to talk. Surely he wouldn't be so rude as to merely take the cookies and push her out of the house?

"How do you think this looks?" She asked her husband, presenting him with the china that contained the cookies. She'd put a red bow on top for decoration.

Mervin was doing a crossword puzzle. His eyes barely even lifted up. "It looks nice, dear."

"Oh," she scowled, "you didn't even see it!"

He did look up this time, unimpressed. "It looks the same as any other time-what's with the bow? Did you take it out of the Christmas container?"

"So what if I did?" She straightened herself up. "I want it to look nice."

"For who, exactly?"

"Our neighbors," she said. "The ones across the street. You know, the red-headed man and his daughters."

"Gladys," Mervin said warningly. "You leave those people alone."

She shot him a look, miffed. "I'm bringing them cookies."

"You're being nosy is what you're doing," he pointed a finger at her accusingly. "I know what you're up to."

She made a noise from her throat. "I'm not up to anything!"

"Oh, yes you are," he got up out of his chair. "You're going to go over there and use the cookies to get information. I'm telling you, Gladys, leave the man alone."

"You're not the least bit curious about him?" She said, taking a quick glance in the direction of the window. "I've never seen him speak to anyone in all the years he's lived over there."

"No," he said flatly. "If he wanted to speak to us, he would have by now. He doesn't need you going over there to bother him. You remember what happened with the Kremps, don't you? You remember being tossed out of the house and Mrs. Kremp threatening to hit you with that pan of hers?"

Gladys adjusted her dress primly. She vaguely recalled it. But it hadn't been her fault. The woman had simply overreacted to an innocent question. How was she supposed to have known that the ugly vase on the mantel contained the ashes of her father?

Mervin folded his arms across his chest, sighing heavily. "Don't go causing any more trouble."

"I'm doing no such thing," she was offended he thought so little of her. "I'm just going to ask a few questions."

"Gladys-"

"Don't you ever wonder what happened to that wife of his?" She cut him off.

"No. But they likely got divorced, if anything."

"Not divorced. Murdered," she revealed.

His eyes widened in surprise. It was about time he finally reacted, She thought with satisfaction "She was murdered?" he said in disbelief.

"Well," she shifted and his expression turned into a glare, "I can't say for sure that's what happened, but I have reason to believe the man and his daughters are in the witness protection program."

He inhaled, shutting his eyes as if praying that he was given more strength. "What?"

"Now just listen," she advised. "No one really knows much about them, do they? They don't talk to people and we don't even know his name. His wife was around and suddenly she disappeared! Now, I think they must have been involved in some illegal gang activity and one of those gang members must have come back to finish her off!"

"Do you know how mad you sound right now?" Mervin snapped.

"I'm not mad, I'm serious."

"And that's what scares me," Mervin muttered. Louder, he said, "I don't want you going over there, do you hear me? You're not going to say a word of that nonsense to him!"

"It's not nonsense-"

"Oh, you're right. It's worse," he scowled. "When is this all going to stop, hmm? When am I going to get peace?"

She harrumphed. "You're not even listening to me!"

"I'm the one not listening? You're the one not listening to me! I'm trying to save you from getting your lights knocked out. I'm warning you, Gladys. Don't do it." He gave her one last look. "Now I'm going back to my puzzle and I'm keeping an eye on that door!"

"Yes, dear," she said pleasantly. She stayed put like he asked, until he went to the bathroom that is. Then she quickly grabbed the cookies and bounded out the door and across the road. When she came to a stop on his front porch, she smoothed down her hair and dress.

Hmm, she noticed his door was ajar. Did he know? Perhaps not. Well, there was no harm in going in a bit. "Hello?" She said cheerfully. "Is anyone home?"

No one responded but someone was there. She heard noises coming from inside. There were people talking. Three in fact. The man and his daughters, she realized she had never heard their voices before.

"Can I show you, please?"

"I said no, Molly. You know the rules."

"It'll be quick! And no one'll know. I won't tell anyone."

Tell anyone what? She frowned.

"And what if someone sees?"

"I told you he'd say no."

"Oh, shut up!"

"Girls, stop arguing."

"Please, Dad? Please!"

"I already told you no. Especially with the windows open. What if someone saw you? I'm in no mood to deal with it today. The department has enough reports already."

What department? What reports? What did he not want to deal with? She stuck her ear in as far as she could.

"Don't worry, if someone sees, we'll just call Uncle Harry. He can take care of them."

She gulped. Take care of them? Surely she didn't...she didn't mean that kind of take care of. She couldn't have. No. That was preposterous.

Oh, my. What if...what if the man was still involved in the gang? What if they were doing illegal activity in the house? Were the girls involved too? Was that what she wanted to show him and he was afraid of getting caught?

There was a pause.

"Quickly. And don't think you'll be doing this all the time."

She decided on going in. She had to see what was going on. For the good of the neighborhood, of course. She had to know. Inhaling, she braced herself and burst into the home and came to a halt in front of the kitchen.

Just as a textbook magically turned into a chicken. And the girl! She...she was holding a stick-

The man and his daughters froze. Gladys stammered, pointing a shaky finger at them.

"You...that..."

She fell flat on her back in a faint.

/

Molly stood over her body, peering down at it through her glasses. "Is she dead?"

Percy rubbed at his face tiredly. "No, honey. She's just fainted."

"That's good," Lucy said from where she sat on the countertop. "What was she doing here anyway?"

"I have no idea," he shook his head.

Molly was still peering down at her. "Dad, can I take a picture? I've never seen a muggle faint before."

"No, Molly."

Percy sighed and began to write a letter to the Accidental Muggle Reverse Squad.

[realcube]

karasuno boys spending christmas with you 🎄

;tw// christmas (?), santa ig, extreme fluff, shoplifting, underage drinking, violence, ennoshita, kinoshita and narita exclusion 😞

(a/n): ik the gif isn’t hq but look how cute it is (○｀ 3′○). also i’m aware that i wrote a rather western-washed version of Christmas (despite the characters in question not being western) but as someone of an asian ethnicity, imo western traditions surrounding Christmas are a lot more..festive (?) which i hope that isn’t offensive considering that Christmas was popularised by the west. so, in short, sorry the traditions aren’t those that are celebrated in japan (or asia) but i just found it i had a lot more inspiration to write it this way. :) perhaps i’ll make a part 2 with aoba johsai or nekoma celebrating Christmas with japanese traditions

Shōyō Hinata

you spend christmas at his house bc he wants to be with his sister on the day

and any sibling that you live with, he insists that they stay over too 

but if you don’t have any younger siblings then y’all just spend the whole day spoiling natsu

hinata absolutely adores how well you get on with his sister, it just makes him so happy seeing his two favourite people having fun together 

although, it did make him a bitter when he asked natsu if she likes the doll he bought her and she said,

“Yeah, thank you. But look at the Furby (L/N) got me! It’s pink and so fluffy, feel it! And it talks, it’s eyes move and-” Then she continues to rave on about how amazing your gift was.

honestly, y’all spend the whole day pampering natsu; making sure she has the best christmas possible

y’all made gingerbread cookies with her, helped her built a snowman (or rather, a snowwoman because she insisted that it was a lady), snowangels, opening presents, christmas crackers, watching movies - the whole shabang.

probably the only time in the day were she was sad was at 10PM when hinata insisted that she goes to bed

natsu looked at you to back her up in her argument that she should be allowed to stay up late on christmas but you kinda just stood there like 🧍‍♀️/🧍‍♂️

not wanting to get involved in their family drama (unproblematic liege 😍😩)

eventually though, natsu did go to bed and as soon as she was sound asleep, you and hinata spent the night cuddling while watching more christmas movies as you were both too tired to do anything else

you ended up falling asleep in his arms and it was a christmas miracle that his arm didn’t get pins and needles like it usually did while cuddling for a long period of time

Tobio Kageyama 

i’m a firm believer that he doesn’t celebrate christmas

not that he doesn’t like the concept, it’s just doesn’t understand the hype

plus - other than going to nationals - there isn’t much he wants and from what he knows, santa can’t make that happen

but as soon as you come over to his house on christmas day with a tub filled with cookies shaped and decorated like volleyballs, suddenly christmas is his favourite holiday

he invites you inside to eat the cookies with him and you notice that he’s watching a volleyball match on the TV

you giggle at how passionate he is about about the sport and offer to cast a Christmas movie from your phone onto the TV

he says yes since this is probably the 10th time he’s rewatched the same match 

you scroll through the list of christmas movies available on Netflix, “Wanna watch Arthur Christmas?”

“No.”

“How about the Grinch?”

“Eh, no.”

“Ooh! What about the Nativity? I love that movie-”

“No thanks.”

So you ended up watching Frozen and Frozen 2 (on a different streaming site) because Kageyama didn’t like any of the Christmas movies available on Netflix

You figured that Frozen kinda counted as a Christmas movie because..there was snow :) 

anyway, you already knew Kageyama tolerated Disney Movies so Frozen was your best bet

and as it turns out, he was oddly engaged by the movie which gave you an opening to slip into his arms, stifling an evil snicker the whole time

as we all know, when Kageyama is into something he is into it.

so whenever the climax of the movie comes up (or any part with high suspense) you feel him squeeze you slightly and tense up 

AND IT IS THE MOST ADORABLE THING PERIODT 🥺😩

so yeah your christmas with him is not overly Praise The Lord but it very fun and cute since it mostly consists of Disney movies

(also Barbie: A Christmas Carol because it gave you both overwhelming nostalgia since he has a big sister who i now headcanon to be a barbie movie addict ✋)

Kei Tsukishima 

the biggest grinch™

mostly bc every year he drops hints to both his mum and brother that he wants new headphones but every year he still gets a snowglobe from his mum and something dinosaur related from his brother

even though his brother is aware that he is ‘too old for that shit’ now 

but Akiteru just loves seeing his brother’s pissed off face whenever he opens his gift (which is a similar size to a headphones box) to find something like a Jurassic Park Lego set

anyway, backstory over - in short, Tsukishima very much dislikes Christmas

So when you appear at his door with a gift, he slams the door closed

“Tsukishima!” You roar as that was quite rude - even for Tsukishima - since it was snowing and you were clearly freezing, “Let me in! I’m freezing my tits off out here!”

Eventually, he did let you in and gave you a hot chocolate as an apology but as soon as you tried to hand him the give, he refused to take it

“No.”

“Why not?” You whined, clearly upset that he wouldn’t take the gift you went through so much effort to get your hands on.

“Because I didn’t get you anything.”

You rolled your eyes, “You got me this hot chocolate - now, take it. It’s seriously not much.”

Upon eyeing the wrapped box in your hand, he realised it was about 9x9″ - the same size as the tub you usually deliver food in, meaning that the gift was probably some sweet treats

“Alright.” He sighed, accepting he gift as he figured that he could easily pay you back by making Christmas cookies with you or something

He hummed, delicately unwrapping the gift and his heart skipped a beat as he noticed the present inside was in a black box rather than a clear tub which you normally gave homemade treats in

nevertheless, he persevered in unwrapping the box 

when he finally finished, his heart dropped yet he couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed with joy

“Wireless headphones.” He muttered to himself, doing everything in his power to resist the smile tugging on the corner of his lips but it was challenging, to say the least

“Yeah!” You chirped, “Don’t worry about the price though, I got them on a Black Friday sale.” You lied, aware that it was usually considered rude to talk about the price of a gift you’ve given but knowing if you didn’t say anything, Tsukishima would assume you paid full price (which you did smh) and immediately empty his bank account in order to pay you back

You could almost envision the situation already; “Would you like it in cash or cheque?”

“Neither, Kei!” 

“You seriously got me branded headphones?” Non-imaginary Tsukishima asked, unable to pry his eyes off the long-awaited gift in his hands

“Y-Yeah.” You stuttered at his unusually sinister voice. “I wanted to buy you noise-cancelling headphones and Google said these were the best ones available that weren’t selling for millions of y--”

“I love you.”

You did a double-take, “Huh?”

“I love you.”

You did a..triple-take.. “I-I don’t think I heard you correctly.”

“I’m not saying it again, dumbass.”

now, tsukishima wasn’t a very affectionate person but considering you paid full price for headphones (yes, he knows. you’re not a very good liar 😐) for him, the least you deserved was forehead kisses 

plus, he was determined to make you as happy as you made him that day

so can get all the kisses you want, all the hugs, all the cuddles, all the smiles, all the cookies-  everything!

but that’s not to say that he’s not going to get you anything in return as subtly through the day he was gathering info on what to get you 

by the end of it, he had a whole list but unfortunately - after looking at his bank account - he realised that the only thing he could afford was an easy-bake oven (┬┬﹏┬┬)

Tadashi Yamaguchi

y’all spent Christmas at your house because Yamaguchi was absolutely entranced by your massive Christmas tree

he also slept over because you both wanted experience the Christmas morning buzz together 

also because your parents were working on Christmas day and Yamaguchi didn’t want you to be alone 🥺

(he didn’t tell you that though as he didn’t want you to think that he felt bad for you or anything)

after you both completed you morning routines, you raced downstairs (quite literally raced; you won.) to open the presents

the milk and cookies you both hand left out for ‘Santa’ was gone because your parents chugged the milk and scarfed the cookies before they left for work

“Open the presents I got you first!” You urged Yamaguchi, pointing to the two presents wrapped in Sanrio wrapping paper

 Yamaguchi did so; sitting on the floor cross-legged to open the larger, box-shaped gift first

“Candy!” He chirped with a smile, gently shifting through the selection of sweets you got him, his grin stretching as he did so and once he was finished, it was beaming ear-to-ear. “You know me so well, thank you so much, (L/N).” 

You giggled, a light blush crossing your features at the praise - then motioning to the second, smaller, thinner gift.

Yamaguchi accidently tore the wrapping paper off to reveal basic, charcoal face masks.

You quickly interjected to explain, “You said that you were embarrassed about how the animal-themed face masks your mum bought you were too childish and that they just made your skin more oily so bought you those; less embarrassing and supposedly good for oily skin.”

Yamaguchi’s heart fluttered upon hearing how much attention you paid during his random rants, “Thank you, babe!” He enthused, hugging the mask to his chest.

After that, you opened the gift he bought you and were over the moon when you realised that it was a box full of adorable stationary 

“I noticed how you kept complaining about your pens running out of ink during class and..yeah..I hope you like it..”

You obviously loved it and expressed that by giving him a big bear hug and many kisses (づ￣ 3￣)づ (*≧︶≦))

By then, it was around Midday so you had time to play in the snow for a bit before Yamaguchi had to go home to spend the rest of Christmas with his family

but of course he came back on Boxing Day to binge watch movies and cuddle with you 🥰

Daichi Sawamura

okay; I am going to say this and you aren’t going to argue with me bc I know that I’m right:

if you have any younger siblings or cousins staying in your house for Christmas (and I mean younger like 5 or less) and the kid isn’t a little shit

daichi (with your assistance) will dress up as Santa and you will dress up as an elf to surprise the child with a visit 

daichi would be like ‘ho ho ho!’ and you’d be like ‘shut up, santa, you fatass.’ 

and the kid would be like ✪ ω ✪

y’all would take pictures and shit before santa dips 🚶‍♂️🛷

after that, you both would head back to his place to celebrate a kid-free christmas 

you don’t open gifts because you both mutually agreed not to get anything for each other this year since you had ‘grown out of presents’ (tsk).

but you did get a RingFit Adventure from one for your relatives for Christmas so you and Daichi spend an hour or two playing that 

it’s surprisingly taxing though so you’re both puffed afterwards

so you decided to make spaghetti for yourself and Daichi and a Christmas miracle occurred..he got off of his ass to help you cook 🤩

usually he’d hide his fear off fucking up under toxic masculinity but today he actually let you teach him how to make food and he was a natural chef tbh

however, his habit of grabbing your ass or holding your lower back wasn’t especially helpful while he had tomato sauce all over his hands

you changed into a different pair of bottoms as the spaghetti cooled down

then, a second Christmas miracle occurred

Daichi gave you both permission to eat in the living room, on the couch, so y’all could watch a movie or something as you ate

every other day of the year, daichi would have to be killed before he let anybody eat in the living room - forget on his new couch 

but today was a special so he let it slide

originally, the plan was to watch a Christmas movie but then you noticed that a new episode of y’alls favourite show was out - House Hunters - so you just watched that instead 

hey, it made you both happy so why not?

especially with daichi’s running commentary which you outwardly expressed annoyance to but internally loved

“Andromeda will never be Suzanne, rest easy.”

“That house is so ugly, next.”

“Why’s their budget so low? May as well just buy a caravan.”

“They are so fucking picky.”

“Her face annoys me.”

IT LIKE HIS ALTER-EGO IT’S AMAZING

anyway, merry christmas to the daichi stans and that is from me, not daichi - he actually forgot it was Christmas at noon

Kōshi Sugawara

SUGA IS DOMESTIC LIKE DAICHI BUT MAKE IT ❄ FESTIVE❄

y’all bake christmas cookies together, exchanges small gifts, bake carrot cake, watch The Polar Express, bake pudding, kiss under the mistletoe, bake-- yeah, there was a lot of baking

get ready to work out twice as much and start dieting if you don’t want to develop an illness due to the amount of sugar you consumed

to be honest, Suga was kinda lost for things to do on the actual day of Christmas bc y’all were so hyped preparing for it so he had no idea how to top that

I mean, you both went on romantic, late night car drives to buy a tree

cute couple trips to the store to purchase decorations 

planning out and putting the decorations around the house (and with both of your keen eyes for design, the house ends up looking gorgeous ofc)

you ornamented the tree in his living room but it was so tall that he couldn’t reach the very tip to put the final decoration on top

so you hopped onto his shoulders and stuck the star on top with a smile

but he wasn’t done with you yet, he rushed around the house with you on his shoulders while you clung onto his hair as if your life depended on it 

he did most of the festivities with you before Christmas but he saved one special one for the day

“(Y/N), let’s bake something.” 

You sighed, shooting him a weary smile, “Suga, we’ve been baking all day.”

“Just one last thing! It’s not even baking actually, more like assembling.”

You quirked an eyebrow at his statement, “Hm? What is it?”

“Let’s make our dream houses with gingerbread!”

Of course you agreed. Not just because he is the cutest thing you’ve ever laid your eyes on but also since it sounded rather fun

“What are those?” You pointed to the weird rectangular designs on the roof of his house

“Solar panels.” He hummed, elegantly icing the sides of his house, “I want my future house run on that energy.”

“Anyway, what’ve you got on your house?” Finishing off the final swirl on his door, he turned to look at your gingerbread home and deadpanned 

A sheepish grin formed on your lips as you noticed his blank expression towards your ‘dream home’ which has walls garnished with golden, edible glitter and sugar paper sanrio characters on the roof along with many other extremely unconventional things 

“Hey,” you shrugged, “Let me have my dreams.”

“Of course,” Suga agreed, his usual sweet smile returning, “Although, in an ideal world, I thought we’d end up living together and starting a family. However, I don’t think we can do that if you planning on putting a horse head on our front door.”

“IT WAS JUST LYING THERE, KŌSHI! IF ANYTHING IT’S YOUR FAULT FOR GIVING ME ACCESS TO A MARZIPAN HORSE!”

“I DIDN’T THINK THAT YOU’D DECAPITATE IT, (Y/N)! I THOUGHT YOU’D USE IT FOR A STABLE OR FARM OR SOMETHING!”

“YOU SHOULD KNOW ME BETTER THAN THAT!”

Asahi Azumane 

you both spent christmas day in your respective households, promising each other that you’d spend boxing day together 

until around 7PM when you had to come over to his house bc he called you, extremely puzzled at the fact that random mutuals from school (and the whole volleyball team) were on his instagram page, facebook, snapchat and any/every other social media platform wishing him a happy birthday

“I don’t get it.” He spoke through the phone, confusion and anxiety apparent in his voice, “My birthday isn’t for another six days. Why do they think it is today? Is this a joke?” 

“Uh, can I come over? I’d love to see you.” 

“Um, sure.” He replied, even more confused that you didn’t answer his question and instead asking one yourself

you spent the rest of the day with him, trying your very best to distract him from social media by doing various activities 

you both baked, watched movies, played board games (he’s a beast at battleships) then you moved on to other games like charades - basically every bs excuse you could come up with to get him to stay away from his phone

but that’s not to say you didn’t enjoy every second of it bc you did

he is so cute like whenever you are doing an action which he can’t interpret, his automatic guess is ‘are my beautiful gf (Y/N) (L/N) who i love very much? (= ❛ ᴗ ❛=)’

PRECIOUS 💓 

and then you are just like, ‘yes, i am, baby. but i am also optimum prime. your turn.’

anyway, by the end of the day there was no way you were able to prevent him from finding out about the joke now

so you just decided to tell him - figuring that it’d be better for him to hear it from you rather than someone else

“See.. y’know how jesus was allegedly born on christmas day? well, the joke is that..you kinda look like what people assume jesus would’ve looked like..”

Asahi had to do a double-take at what you just said, “Th-they..think I look like jesus?”

“yeah.”

Ryūnosuke Tanaka

you’re both broke af so you spend Christmas day pretending you are a rich couple

you slept over at his house too so you could start early in the morning and by that I mean 10:30AM

firstly, you and tanaka flick through an Argos catalogue (which you found on the ground, so there were a few mud stains on it 😶) to select the gift(s) you were going to buy for your ‘children’

but really it was just you and him going through it and circling all the toys y’all wanted as kids but couldn’t afford/didn’t get

“I super badly wanted one of those kiddie monster trucks that you could control with a remote as a child so my son is going to need one of those.” Tanaka said, circling the monster truck with a marker

“Yes, of course. And I asked for Monster High dolls every year as a kid but my parents said they were everything god hates so let’s buy that because we stan satan in this house, apparently .”

“Of course, of course.” He said in his best ‘rich person’ voice which was actually just an english accent

After resenting your parents for around an hour, you both moved onto the next activity of your rich person Christmas which included reading your horoscope in an english accent

that only lasted a few minutes though because both of you couldn’t be bothered to read

you also planned to look at the stock market (just like all rich people do on christmas day, obvs) but it was so boring

you took a glance then just went ‘okay, bye.’

next, you had caviar - just like rich people eat for every meal of the day, i think.

except it was actually black pop rocks  

“ah, yes. scrumptious.” “the flavour is immaculate.” 

then, as dawn drew close, you and tanaka preformed your final rich person activity 

no, it wasn’t being rude to minimum wage workers

no, it wasn’t being ungrateful

no, it wasn’t exploiting the working class under capitalism

no, it wasn’t being generally stuck-up and cocky

instead, it was going to the grocery shop and buying everything rather than shoplifting :)

“what should we get, babe?” you asked tanaka, in awe at how many different brands of toilet paper were on the shelves. “Have you ever noticed how spoiled we are for choice when it comes to toilet paper?”

“uh, no.” he replied in reference to the toilet paper question, “Hm, how about some gingerbread men or something?”

his suggestion was just met by a blank stare and silence

“JUST KIDDING! WE’RE TOTALLY BUYING BOOZE!”

“Hell yeah!” 

luckily, because tanaka looked a lot older than 17 and also since the cashier was too tired to check his ID, you both managed to buy the drinks without getting caught

“Merry Christmas, Ryū.” You hummed, fidgeting with his hand which was interlocked with yours as you walked through a rather prestigious neighbourhood and admired all the extravagant christmas lights

“Merry Christmas, (Y/N). Love you.”

Yū Nishinoya 

you and noya spent the whole day in his backyard and since it was a white christmas, you were able to spend the 90% playing in the snow

at first, you both went outside with the intention of making snowangels and taking cute couple photos in the snow 

but the weather was just so inviting that you had to stay for a little longer even when you did finish taking pictures; so you made the ‘ultimate’ snowman  

by that, it was just the biggest snowman y’all could make without it falling apart with stones for eyes, spiking out twigs for hair and an empty Monster Energy can for a nose 

once you had completed the snowman and basked in it’s glory for a moment, you went to head inside - but then you felt something hit your back

you turned around to see noya snickering, a mischievous grin on his face which you couldn’t stand

so what started out as him playfully throwing a snowball at your back, eventually turned into a full-on snowball battle to the death

there were snow forts, piles of snow ammunition, mini snow-warriors guarding the edges of your fort, a snow-princess which you were trying to steal from each other’s fort to win (basically like capture the flag but colder..) and a few brunch bars in the middle of the battle field for snack breaks 

it was all going smoothly until Noya ran up to your base, obviously with the intention to steal your princess 

“stay away from her, you fiend!” You yelled, jumping into an offensive stance - your neighbours must hate you bc of all the noise you and Noya made.

Noya screaming his battle cry as he rushed towards your fort, batista bombing you to the ground before you had a chance to attack him with a snowball

now that you were out of the equation, he scurried over to your princess which was perches on a little snow podium you made for her

he grabbed it, lifting it above his head like a trophy and letting out a loud victory cry “I win!”

he then turned to you and laughed upon noticing that you had your face buried into the snow in shame, “You have been defeated, (L/N)! And the great Rolling Thunder prospers!” 

“That’s a stupid nickname.” You groaned, outstretching your arms to allow him to pick you up, “Now take me inside, I’m tired.”

“Alright, babe.” He spoke softly, seemingly coming down from his adrenaline high. 

He strolled towards you, scooping you up into his arms - off the snow - and carrying you inside

unbeknownst to him, you had fallen asleep as he held you and once he put you down on the couch and noticed- i- my man almost died of happiness

“Oh my god, (Y/N)! You’re so fucking cute! (❤´艸｀❤)” he hollered, peppering your face in kisses

“Shhh..” you hushed Noya, sticking your bottom lip out to form a pout 

Noya nodded understandingly before hopping onto the couch beside you and snuggling up 

[diaphragmjellyfish]

Miguel Diaz fluff alphabet

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

Miguel loves your smile. He’s a funny guy and he thinks your smile lights up a room so he makes it his mission to make you laugh as much as possible. If you have some crooked teeth, he thinks it’s adorable. Also, looking at your smile makes him think about your lips which just makes him want to kiss you.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

Yes, after he gets a stable job. He would love kids but he doesn’t want to be like his dad and end up abandoning his family so he would make extra sure he could support the child and you and makes a conscious effort to be there for his family no matter what. Asking about their day, being involved in their sports/clubs/hobbies, making snacks when they have friends over. He just wants to be the Cool Dad ™ and would probably try to teach them karate before they could even sit up.

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

He loves to have you sit between his legs and lean back against his chest so he can wrap his arms around you and make sure you’re always safe and warm. It’s the perfect position for movies, video games, deep conversations, baths. He will also often come up behind you at a party and hold you like this if someone is hitting on you or if you look uncomfortable or bored. He can whisper little jokes in your ear or kiss you on the cheek.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

He loves fun dates. You both have always found fancy dinner dates really awkward. He likes something where you guys can move around, do activities, and just let loose. The go-to’s are usually mini golf, the arcade, the zoo, or just a nice picnic in the park. He often gets you little gifts before dates, though, like flowers, a stuffed animal, or a cool rock he found. His Yaya taught him never to show up for a date empty handed. And he’s a total gentleman, never making you uncomfortable or rushing things. Miguel keeps his hands to himself unless instructed otherwise.

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…)

You are my sunshine. As cheesy as it is, Miguel sees you as the shining light in his life. You make everything better, whether that’s an injury, a bad day at school, or losing a fight at training. He knows he can always go to you and be distracted by your beautiful smile.

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

Miguel first knew he was in love with you when you met his family for the first time. They invited you over for dinner one night and he told you his Yaya didn’t speak much english, so you asked him to teach you some spanish so you could talk with her. It wasn’t perfect, you made lots of grammar mistakes and really only said a couple sentences to her, but the effort you made combined with the smile on Yaya’s face made him fall absolutely head-over-heels.

If you already speak spanish, it would be seeing you talk with his Yaya and joke around with her over dinner.

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

The most gentle boy on the face of the Earth. Like I said earlier, Miguel keeps his hands to himself unless you tell him otherwise. The first time you guys kiss, he barely moves a muscle. You had to grab his hands and put them on your waist. Even now, when he’s teaching you karate, he refuses to hit or grab you, so you honestly don’t really learn anything lol and if you’re sick or sleeping, he’s like a feather, so scared to disturb you. It’s like touching a kitten honestly

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

All. The. Time. He’s not too big on PDA, except for hand-holding. This is how he lets everyone know you’re taken without seeming possessive or gross. Miguel will grab your hand at the mall, at school, while y’all are cuddling, at the beach, literally whenever you’re in arm’s reach from him, he’s holding your hand.

I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

Miguel’s first impression of you is that you’re this bright ray of sunshine. He’s drawn to you like a magnet. Your eyes, your smile, your laugh! And when he finally works up the nerve to say hi (Strike first!) he thinks his heart might actually melt. When you actually laugh at the joke he makes and hold out your hand to introduce yourself, he turns bright red and can barely speak omfg this poor boy. But luckily you think it’s sweet and keep talking to him.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

He did at first, we’ve all seen how he acts with Sam and Robby, but you lay down the law. You have to tell him that it’s not cool, it makes people uncomfy, and then he finally starts to work on it. Now he’s better. He still feels jealous sometimes, but he trusts you and can control himself a bit more.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

So your first kiss. You were giving him The Look for like 10 minutes straight and he never made a move. He just stared at you. So you had to be the first one to actually lean in, but once you did, he met you halfway. His kisses match his personality. Sweet, gentle, and goofy, but with a more dominant, aggressive side if you know how to bring it out ;)

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

He did. After you had dinner with his family and he realized he loved you, he told you almost immediately. This boy just wears his heart on his sleeve. He was walking you home and when you got to your house and turned around to kiss him goodnight, he had a funny look on his face. When you asked him what was wrong he kind of went ILOVEYOU! Really fast and you had to make him say it again slower because you thought he had a stroke or smth lmaooo but once he took a deep breath and said it more clearly, you jumped on him and kissed his whole face and said it back a hundred times.

M = Memory (What’s their favourite memory together?)

When he first introduced you to Sensei Lawrence. He thought Sensei was gonna be super mean and make fun of you, but turns out you guys had a lot in common. You loved 80’s rock music, and responded to his sass with even more sass. Johnny almost couldn’t believe Miguel was able to get such a cool babe. You guys all had lunch after taking a tour of the dojo, and it was a super fun day! You all drove around in Johnny’s car with the windows down listening to Guns ‘n Roses.

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

Miguel spoils you in his own little way. His family isn’t as fortunate as others, but he still finds ways to make you feel special. Instead of a diamond necklace, he gives you a cool rock he found outside and cleaned up. Instead of taking you to expensive restaurants, he spends all day cooking with Yaya to make a nice picnic for you guys to have on the beach. And he saves up to buy you nice gifts for your birthday or anniversary.

O = Orange (What colour reminds them of their other half?)

Rose gold. You’re so beautiful to him and have this natural charm that everyone falls for. You’re so radiant and yet soft and unique. He just love love loves you.

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

Sweety, sweetheart, baby, gorgeous, and Princess during more intimate moments.

Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?)

80’s rock music. He learns to love it through Sensei Lawrence. He even saves up to buy a record player so he can feel more connected to the past.

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

Build blanket forts, cuddle, bake cookies, he might even let you put makeup on him if you ask nice.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

Humor. He loves cracking jokes and lightening the mood. If you’re ever feeling down you know you can go to him and he will turn that frown upside down in mere minutes. Honestly even just being in his presence makes you happier. He cheers himself up by working out, taking some alone time to get his feelings out, and then going out with some friends or with you.

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

Umm, karate! Duh lol the boy is obsessed with it. Also superhero movies, video games, his day, he’s honestly kind of a rambler. He can talk about anything and everything if he’s nervous enough. Let’s not forget the gas station scene in season 1…

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

You, dark rooms, white noise, puppies, linen scented candles, his mom’s cooking.

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

His new muscles. Ever since joining Cobra Kai, he’s gotten pretty ripped and now it’s a struggle to get him to keep his shirt on. He worked hard for that body, he wants people to see how good he looks!

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

After college, he takes you on a hike up to this ridge overlooking a lake. It’s fall, the leaves are changing colors, and there’s no one around. You guys have been holding hands the whole time, but his hand is super sweaty even though it’s like 50 degrees out. You guys finally get to the top of the ridge and he grabs both your hands and tells you all the things he loves about you. This boy basically recites your whole love story, and as soon as he sticks his hand in his pocket you know what’s going on. He barely even got the box out of his pocket before you were jumping on him screaming Yes! You guys fell to the ground and he stopped you so he could officially get the words out. You were both crying, it was very beautiful.

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?)

More Than Words by Extreme. You guys dance to this at your wedding.

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

Absolutely. Y’all marry pretty young, like right out of college. He knew you were gonna get married on the first date.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

Iguana. He thinks they’re like little dinosaurs! He would name it Wade because we know he loves Deadpool.

[lilypixels]

...............all of them.....?

It took me an hr to do this....🥲💀

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Teacupsss

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Lollipops

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Uhhh cotton candy

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Probably quiet and smart lol I did my school work and was friendly with everyone so I was a favorite and heard all the nice things 🙈

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

I kinda like bottles more but like the glass ones with the caps that could slice your fingers-

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

I’m for all but sports lol

7. earbuds or headphones?

Earbuds

8. movies or tv shows?

Shows cause I’m the type to watch an hr long episode vs hr long movie idk why but I’m rarely in mood for them

12. name of your favorite playlist?

Drop the beat (ie songs that are upbeat and I like most)

13. lanyard or key ring?

Hmm...I guess lanyard?

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Skittles or twizzlers

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

I had lots I had to read in school but only ever finished a handful lol my favorite I think was maybe Macbeth? I would say Odyssey but I don’t think we read the full thing cause I remember being disappointed about something like that...

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Sitting with my legs bent up in seat with me in some way

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

Converse and some nice but cheap sneakers from Walmart

18. ideal weather?

Not too hot, not too cold, mild like before/after a rain (most the time), idc if it’s raining or sunny but as long as temp is comfortable I’m fine

19. sleeping position?

On my side most often

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Phone and notebook

21. obsession from childhood?

Oh gosh uhhh I guess my like of dolls maybe? Or obsession with anything ✨unexplained✨ like ghosts, aliens, cryptids, etc

22. role model?

Kim Namjoon lol just kidding (sorta)

23. strange habits?

Ok I know I have some and my friends would be more than happy to point them all out but hm let me think...idk if these count as habits but I’ll never place a mirror facing a bed (this is more superstitious I guess than habit,,,) I can’t stand my food touching, if I have a tray like in cafeteria I have a certain spot for everything and uh my mind just went blank-

24. favorite crystal?

Moonstone, lapis lazuli, and I feel obligated to say garnet cause it’s my birthstone

25. first song you remember hearing?

Circle of Life maybe who knows xD

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Walk or clean,,I’m more active and about with warm/nice weather

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

...stay inside where it’s warm

28. five songs to describe you?

Not this again😭 uhhh idk you tell me ajdbd

29. best way to bond with you?

Indulge me when I go off about things I like or learn 😔✊ I know I’ll talk your ear off and I’m sorry but know I don’t often talk about these things with people so once I start it’s hard to stop,,and it makes me really happy when people do listen to me about these things and send me related items every so often or even look into it themselves to learn more 🥺

30. places that you find sacred?

For some reason this feels like a trick question...um cemeteries and anything with ages of history I guess

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

Oof do I really have a true outfit?? I have shoes for this which are just black platform sneakers I call stomping shoes

32. top five favorite vines?

I never,,,watched these,,,

33. most used phrase in your phone?

“Yes”...?

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

State Farm and McDonald’s, always

35. average time you fall asleep?

10-11...usually...

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

Uhhh that one with the ginger dude (I think it was someone’s yearbook photo??) I don’t remember much else about the meme but it was on ifunny, or whatever the app was, a lot

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Suitcase

38. lemonade or tea?

Easy, tea

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

...neither

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Dude these questions really testing my brain power here- for senior prank someone put cereal in some bathroom sinks I think

41. last person you texted?

My mom

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

I’m gonna say jacket since I wear those often

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

Hoodie or cardigan

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

Usually whatever shirt I’m wearing that day and some pj/lounge pants 🤷

47. favorite type of cheese?

Mozzarella

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

I-what kind of question is this? How does one even answer this?

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

What comes around goes around lol (yes I’m a heavy believer of karma)

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

Lol who knows, probably something dumb me and my siblings were doing or something we watched cause there’s been plenty times of that xD

51. current stresses?

Homework vs free time e-e

52. favorite font?

I like the gothic looking ones but it’s usually not practical to use so idk

53. what is the current state of your hands?

My hands...? They’re fine ??

54. what did you learn from your first job?

How to care for babies and little kids, how to put on a diaper lol

56. favorite tradition?

I can’t remember a particular one off hand but I’m trying to start few new ones like decorating cookies for Halloween uwu

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Uhhhhh like personally or...? Cause we’ve overcome homelessness before, um finishing assignments idk😭 oh maybe bullying?? That’s all I can think of since I still struggle with a lot,,

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Alright let’s do thisss: creativity (mostly in writing sense), I can bake/cook, I have amazing organization skills and many work places have used that lol (bonus is I don’t mind, I actually really enjoy it, very peaceful), surprisingly good balance all things considered, I’m a quick learner

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“I’m too tired for this.”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Good question good question🤔 I don’t think I’d last in any of them/have a terrible side character role so 💀

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“Life’s too short to hold grudges.”

62. seven characters you relate to?

Dude this is gonna get embarrassing I can feel it🤠

Itaru, Iori, Sogo, Belle, Simeon (obey me), Nozaki (he’s clueless about romance irl and doesn’t know when someone has a crush on him yet can write romance well enough and yeah it’s me lol), and uhh Swindler/Ordinary Person in Akudama Drive (still can’t believe no one really has names in that anime but the way she gets wrapped in everything felt like something that’d happen to me lol)

63. five songs that would play in your club?

Like nightclub...? I’m skipping this ajdbd

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Probably the Barbie site, me and my sister played all the dress up games almost daily istg

65. any permanent scars?

Appendectomy scars and then looks like I have one on a toe but it’s possible it still might heal...

66. favorite flower(s)?

Nightshade, foxglove, baby’s breath, bellflowers, roses

67. good luck charms?

I don’t think I have any...

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

Lemon

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

Let me think...I read something once about flowers having ears(?) but like not ear ears just something about having a part that picks up sound waves

70. left or right handed?

Right

71. least favorite pattern?

Lolll animal print I think

72. worst subject?

Physics...the worst science

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

6...?

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I don’t remember, it probably happened when i was 6. I do remember losing one of my front teeth during my birthday one year and I was happy since the tooth had been loose for some time xD

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Chips I guess or just like fried in skillet

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

A succulent probably

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

Neither ew

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

They are both about equally terrible

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Earth

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

Fireflies

82. pc or console?

I am on pc side now

83. writing or drawing?

Writing

84. podcasts or talk radio?

Podcasts I guess

84. barbie or polly pocket?

Barbie

85. fairy tales or mythology?

Mythology, it’s too fun and chaotic lol

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Hm...cupcakes

87. your greatest fear?

Uh,,,I don’t have many fears but I guess one would be falling from a great height? So I would get scared of crossing a bridge and it collapsing or riding a plane and it falling easily

88. your greatest wish?

World peace🥲

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My mom maybe...?

90. luckiest mistake?

I honestly don’t remember but something I do remember is I out semicolon instead of period and turned out to be correct grammar lol

91. boxes or bags?

Boxes

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

Sunlight or fairy lights, I don’t require much either way and prefer more natural lighting

93. nicknames?

Lassie, twinkle toes, Ash, poody butt (by 3 yr old I sometimes watch and play with lol he means it affectionately; I call him monkey butt and it’s catching on slowly instead)

94. favorite season?

Starting to be fall just a little more but I like transition times most

95. favorite app on your phone?

Let’s go with twitter

96. desktop background?

It is a moriarty and gang pic

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

2: mine and my moms

98. favorite historical era?

Ooo tough one but I’ll say renaissance as some of the coolest things came from that time

[sunlitcigars]

Soft!Dallas Headcanons

(Is this a little ooc? Yes. Am I also a slut for Soft!Dallas? 110% also yes.)

(Not my GIF)

Tags: @lastluvbug @disasterinadress97​

General:

 Dallas would never admit it but he has separation anxiety 

It's always why he stays at Bucks because he knows he's not alone and also why he's always at the Curtis'

He's also got PTSD from New York

Certain gunshots trigger memories in him

We all know the boy is touch starved let's be honest

He's subtle about it though like him always swinging his arm around Johnny and/or touching shoulders with Ponyboy or anyone of the gang

He loves the feeling of someone running their fingers through his hair

He really enjoys cuddles

Doesn't really matter what kind they are he just wants someone to hold him and make him feel okay

Always has his shirt tucked in as a habit because back in New York a lot of people would touch up on him 

 When he's nervous or on the verge of a breakdown he either starts bouncing his legs non-stop or starts scratching at his arms 

Will also play with his ring if he has it on

When he's stressed out and doesn't want to bother the gang or anybody else he'll usually go to the lot and watch the clouds go by if it's nice whether 

But when it rains he'll usually be up in his room at Buck's and watch from his window as it passes by (same goes when it's snowing)

He may like rain but he's scared of thunderstorms

Whenever he hears thunder he either puts his knees to his chest and bury his head in his legs or cover his ears or both

When that happens at the Curtis' one of the guys rub his back and pull him close to them until it's over 

 One of the things he's also afraid of is the dark since his whole life has been consumed by it

If the power goes out when he's alone he grabs a pillow and imagines one of the gang or someone so it doesn't seem like he's alone 

If the power goes out when he's at the Curtis' he'll grab someone's arm or hide his face in their shoulders

Can make bombass cupcakes and cookies but no one has ever tried them except for Tim

He actually really likes jazz because it reminds him of a simpler time in his life

Dallas doesn't really like big parties because the amount of loud shouting reminds him of back in New York when either the police would shoot at random gang members or something else

HE'S EMOTIONALLY UNSTABLE AND WE ALL KNOW IT 

Dallas was close to Mrs. Curtis because she was the only women in his life that represented a motherly figure to him 

But when he heard the news about the crash he locked himself up in his room silently crying and never left the room the gang or anyone for that matter saw him for at least two weeks

(The only time anyone saw him in between those two weeks was at Mr. and Mrs. Curtis' fun

NSFW:

He's the type to talk big but is actually really shy in bed

Some people thinks he's the bratty sub type but really he gets flustered so easily

He's packing a 5 ½ to 6 Inches let's be honest here

He's not good with words in bed so if he wants something he'll stutter it out or whisper/mutter it under his breath

He feels so vulnerable laid out naked for the person on the bed 

He wants to feel he's validated enough to know that he's loved by the person 

He won't say it to anyone but he loves the feeling of being filled with cum 

His nipples are sensitive as fuck

Like if someone only played with them he'd orgasm in less then four minutes

D A D D Y  K I N K

H U M I L I A T I O N  K I N K

O R G A S M  C O N T R O L

He's actually really vocal during sex but would muffle his sounds with a pillow or cover his mouth with his hand or bite down on his lips

He whimpers

A lot

If he's feeling special then he'll put on a little show whether that's him strip teasing or touching himself for someone

If he's having a one night stand he prefers to be on his stomach/or hand and knees but if he's in a relationship then he prefers to be on his back so he can look at them and feel comfortable and safe

Hickeys are a huge fuck yes because they remind him who he belongs to and shows people not to try and hook up with him

Another one night stand vs. An actual relationship is that he usually has a cigarette after having sex but if he's in a relationship then he doesn't need one since he already feels content

Aftercare is a huge part for him 

He loves getting pampered and cared for because it's the only time he feels like he doesn't have to act so tough and can relax and let his walls down

FYI he's capable of doing grabby hands just so y'all know

In A Relationship:

He's with the person 24/7

Will low key freak out if he doesn't know where they are and where they went

He's afraid of them finding someone better than him because he feels like he's not good enough for the other person 

Is a little possessive overprotective of the person

If he gets sent to jail he'll give the person his necklace until he's out

He'll also grab something from the person so it doesn't feel like he's completely alone in there

He won't show it but when him and the person are talking through the glass his eyes are filled with loneliness and desperation 

Once he's out he's not leaving their side

Will beat the shit out of anyone who talks shit about his person in a god damn heart beat

He used to be in an abusive relationship so he doesn't let down his walls all the way

If he did something wrong he's always expecting for the worse but then he has to remind himself that they aren't his ex

If him and the person are arguing and they lift up their arm to make a gesture or whatever he will flinch away from them

If they try and leave the bed he'll cling to them like his life depended on it

E X T R A clingy when drunk

He never said I love you so when he said it to the person for the first time he was a stuttering mess

DD/LB: (If you don't like this please don't bitch about it or just simply skip this part)

His headspace is between 4 to 5 years old

Loves when his caregivers call him pet names

Baby boy and prince are his favorite

Likes to color because it keeps his anxiety at a neutral level

Slurs some of his words

Has a fluffy stuffed elephant named Lilac

Finds comfort in his caregivers voice

Clingy

If he wants to be picked up he'll make grabby hands

If he's tired then he'll crawl into his caregivers lap and nuzzle his face into their neck

When he's feeling on the verge of little space in public he'll unnoticeably hold the person's arm 

One of his favorite Disney movie is 101 Dalmatians

Loves to cuddle up in warm blankets

He has a habit of grinding his teeth so his pacifiers help him a lot 

It also helps him whenever he needs a smoke

Or when he needs to bite his lips

Likes bubble baths

His favorite scent to use is lavender :)

Unlike when he's in big headspace he doesn't try and break the rules because when he used to his past caregiver gave him harsh punishments

The first person from the gang he came out to was Ponyboy

One day Ponyboy had to go to Buck's place and while he was in Dallas' room saw Lilac

When he asked him about it Dallas was going to make an excuse but just decided to tell Ponyboy about it

Ponyboy told him he wasn't gonna tell anyone and he kept his word

He kept telling Dallas to tell the gang for a week

It took him a lot to tell the gang he was a little

They all had mixed reactions

All of them were very confused until he explained what it is

(Except for Ponyboy of course)

Darry started to feel more protective over him 

Johnny was surprised because he didn't think of all people Dallas would ever be a little but he was cool with it as long as it helps him

Sodapop is actually really happy about it and he wouldn't mind playing with him when he's in little space

Steve was a little uncomfortable knowing that the reckless hood was a little but he came to accept it

Everyone was waiting for Two-Bit to respond but all of a sudden he just walked out the door without saying anything

Dallas was on the verge of a panic attack and it took awhile for the gang to calm him down

It wasn't until later when Two-Bit came back but this time with a bunch of stuff

He'd gotten Dallas a stuffed animal, bottles, and even a fluffy blanket

Dallas almost started crying ngl

At the end of the day he was just happy his only family accepted him (#supportivegang2020)

When he's in little space the gang tries their best not to smoke or drink around him

On Sundays when they're all not busy they'll watch Disney movies together

One or two of the gang members is alway with him when they're out in public 

With The Gang:

Ponyboy:

Ponyboy reads to Dally whenever he sees him having a bad day or getting nervous 

Whenever Ponyboy reads to him Dallas either has his head in his lap while Ponyboy occasionally runs his hand through his hair or has his head on his shoulder 

On the occasion Dallas tags along with Ponyboy to the library and sometimes picks out a random book he finds interesting or Ponyboy would like and show it to him

Secretly he hopes that Ponyboy would read it out loud to him 

Darry and Soda won't allow him to go to Buck's but if Dallas calls and says he needs him he will not hesitate to go out the door to care for his boyfriend

 If Ponyboy has track Dallas waits for him until it's over

Going to the lot has become a weekly thing for them

When Dallas isn't looking Ponyboy would sneak in a paper that has a poem on it in either his jackets or his pants

Since Dallas never really went to school he has a hard time reading huge words or some so when he's reading over Ponyboy's shoulder he'll ask him

"What's that word?"

"This one?"

"Yeah."

"Absquatulate?"

"Oh." 

Ponyboy finds it fucking adorable

Sodapop:

Sodapop would take him to Dairy Queen and get sundaes and park somewhere with a nice view or park in the parking lot and watch the cars go by

Dallas often goes to the DX and wait until his shift is over 

Sometimes Sodapop will randomly put his hat on Dallas

Whenever girls try and flirt with Sodapop, Dallas either gives them a death state or tell them to fuck off and say he's taken

 When Dallas starts crying Soda will wipe away his tears with his thumbs and kiss his cheeks

Jokingly gave Dallas a promise ring he found somewhere not expecting him to actually wear it but was surprised when he saw it on Dallas' finger

If they're at a party sometimes Soda wanders off but once he sees how uncomfortable Dallas he is he's immediately back at his side

Ponyboy and Darry have walked in on them cuddling on the couch SO MANY TIMES

One time they walked in on them making out heavily Darry had to cover Ponyboy's eyes

Sodapop thinks Dallas looks H O T in his flannels

Darry:

Dallas would always steal borrow Darry's shirt because he feels comforted by it whenever Darry's at work

He absolutely loves it when Darry wraps his arms around him and would always snuggle closer to his chest

(If you really think I'm gonna let Patrick Swayze's singing voice go to waste you're very mistaken)

Whenever he's having a hard time sleeping Darry would usually sing to him until he falls back asleep

Or when Dallas is on edge Darry will hold him close to his chest and sing to him softly until he feels calm again 

Dallas loves Darry's morning voice because it's so low and low key a turn on

When they're out in public Darry would hook his finger around Dallas' belt loops on his jeans to keep him close to him

Some people don't fuck with Dallas as much because they know if they do they'll have to deal with Darry and no one wants to do that unless they have a death wish

If Dallas starts acting up in public all it takes is for Darry to whisper in his ear "behave" 

Darry once talked about the type of flowers his mom liked and kept in the house then a few days later when he got off work he saw the flowers he was talking about in a vase on the dining table with a paper attached saying "Don't ask where I got the flowers and vase"

He almost started crying right then and there

When Dallas is drunk he'll cling to either Darry's chest or back like a koala

One time one of the gang walked in on Darry cooking while Dallas just clung to his back but they didn't say anything in fear of waking up with their dick cut off

Johnny:

Surprisingly Johnny gets protective over 

He will now hesitate to throw down when someone starts talking crap about them

If they're out in public Johnny's always holding Dallas' hand 

Or if they're at the Curtis' Johnny would glance at Dallas every so often to see if he's okay

They both helped each other let their walls down 

When Johnny sees Dallas on edge or not at his best he nudges his head against his shoulder or on his face in hopes of cheering him up (it works more often than he thought it would but he ain't complaining)

 Johnny sometimes shows Dallas some of his favorite places around town

They've fallen asleep in the lot cuddled next to one another multiple times

Johnny tops Dallas sorry not sorry

Sharing cigarettes like kisses

Johnny mindlessly puts his arm in front of Dallas whenever someone's trying to pick a fight

Everytime Dallas talks bad about himself Johnny will be like not on my watch and will do everything and anything to make Dallas feel better

Dallas has a hard time sleeping at night knowing Johnny's with his parents

3AM conversations about the what ifs of life

Two-Bit:

Two-Bit will crack jokes to Dallas when they're alone together about how much of a softie he really is

But if anyone else made fun of Dally he'd beat the literal shit out of them

Also tells bad pick up lines to him even though they're already boyfriends

"Do you have a name? Or can I call you mine?"

Dallas would usually say something back but would low key be blushing

Always trying to make Dallas laugh because he loves it when he does

Would totally smack Dallas' ass in front of the gang

 Respects Dallas' boundaries when he's not feeling it

Ms. Mathews is actually really fond of Dallas 

His sister gave him the whole "hurt my brother and I'll hunt you down" talk

He didn't take it seriously but he keeps it in the back of his head

Dallas is the only one to see Two-Bit's hair without grease and he will play with his hair for hours on end

Two-Bit once fell asleep to Dallas playing with his hair and when he woke up he was still doing it

If they're watching Mickey Mouse Dallas is always on Two-Bit's lap

When he sees Dallas upset he'll do voice impressions of random people (Dallas finds it stupid but it always lightens his mood)

Steve:

Whenever Dallas' on the verge of having a breakdown Steve will drive Dallas around town to calm down

Soft music would be playing in the background while Steve either rubs Dallas' thighs or hold his hand

Dallas would run his finger around Steve's tattoo whenever they're cuddling

Dallas loves laying his head on Steve's chest because it's both soft and muscular 

When he does Steve softly plays with his hair

Whenever he leaves for work he wraps his shirt or jacket around him so Dallas could sleep better

Steve is really observant so whenever he sees something wrong with Dallas he always asks if he's okay

Will glare at anyone who's eyeing his Dallas

Never ever takes his anger out on Dallas

(God will have to fight him if he does)

Dates at the drive in movies and later eating at the diner

They'd always park where they won't get noticed so they can sneak in a few make out sessions here and there ;)

When they go to the diner Dallas kinda feels bad because Steve's always paying for their meals but he always reassures him it's okay

Him and Dallas constantly flirt when he visits the DX

Sodapop finds it amusing and annoying but as long as his best friend is happy he couldn't give a shit

~

Please reblog or comment!

 Let me know if you want to see more and if you'd like any to be turned into a short fic 

Also huge shout out to @lastluvbug​ for helping me come up with most of these ideas! (Thank you for saving my braincells)

[fairymadnessyeah]

BNHA Ship to Finish the Year

ShishiKoda (Shishida Jurota x Koda Koji)

Canon

Before anything, two important things.

Koda is non-binary, pronouns they/them. Also, Koda is selectively deaf.

They only talk with the people who are close to them, with animals, or if they absolutely need to.

I believe that there are a lot of types of heroes, there are daytime heroes, underground heroes, infiltration heroes, etc.

And one of those types, that is rather new, is the eco-hero. They are heroes who, apart from fighting against crime, they also fight for the planet and the animals.

Both Shishida and Koda are Eco-heroes.

I feel like they would start working on the same agency at first, being desk mates.

Koda is selectively deaf, so they communicate with sign language. But not everybody knows, so Shishida translates and gives out the number of a good ASL teacher.

It makes them grow closer, and that is how they start branching out towards the Eco-heroics.

They find an agency that works kind of like Greenpeace having mission out in the world to help with the environment.

They first start local, their first missions aren't even together. Koda is sent to a zoo protest, and Shishida to a stop a deforestation.

They do have to re-study some laws for this job though. UA might be a great school, but they can't teach you everything.

They study together, with Shishida making the coffee and Koda bringing some of the cakes their roommate Satou bakes.

Satou, who is very protective of his roommate and friend Koda, notices that something is going on. But when he asks about it, Koda shrugs it off with pink cheeks.

Shishida doesn't have any roommates, but he still hangs out with his friends from class B. I imagine one day, they drop by uninvited and interrupt one of their study hang out. 

Koda understands and leaves, but the class B boys can feel the sparks in the air.

They tease him non-stop about it, while Shishida tries to deny it.

"Somebody got a crush~," "No, I don't,"

"I bet you want to take them out to that new restaurant you were talking about," "As friends,"

"You should ask them out! They looked ready to pick up what you were giving," "I won't,"

"You are afraid they'll say no and then don't talk to you again, aren't you?" "Terrified,"

Shishida would ask Koda out, but they are so shy that he is afraid that if he does, the relationship they have been building up will crumble.

But that's okay, Shishida can wait.

They keep working and hanging out together, and then one day, they are put on a mission together. This mission takes place in the Amazon, on Brazil.

The two need to travel, and while they are there, Shishida asks Koda out.

They say yes, and when they go back to Japan, they make it official and become the significant other of one another.

I like thinking that Satou starts acting like a protective big brother to Koda and glares at Shishida when he comes to pick him up for dates.

Family

Koda is the only child of a single mother. She doesn't have a name yet, but I think she is a like a 50's mom.

She bakes cookies, she dances to the music of the radio, and leaves lipstick marks on your cheeks when she kisses you.

I also love the idea that no matter who you are, no matter what you are doing, you are going to get greeted with a bear hug by Koda's mom. 

Shishida was not ready. I also like the idea that Shishida has a bun on for the first meeting. He would look so dapper in one.

I also think he would use his strength as a good selling point. Oh, Miss Koda's earing fell under the dishwasher? No worries, Shishida will lift it with his bare hands and place it back where it was once she got it.

I have no ideas as to who Shishida's parents could be, but one thing is for sure, Koda wants to crawl under their bed and stay there until the night passes.

They are a mess and get anxious thinking about it. On the drive there, Koda's mind conjures situation after situation, and how bad and disastrously are all going to end up.

Of course, nothing like that happens.

Shishida's parents are nice and know sign language, so they can communicate no problem.

I don't think they would have kids, but I kind of seeing them moving from the big city and settling in a small village with a giant lot where they rescue animals.

They are some of the only heroes around the small town, along with a few others, and nothing much happens. 

But considering the hectic years they spent as heroes and as students, a nice, quiet town seems like a good option.

When Koda moved out of the apartment, Satou cries and hugs him, while saying that he'll miss them. It's a sad day, but they keep in contact.

Also, their house is so big that both classes come for reunions, and they are even able to bring their kids. 

They have a rehabilitation program, but some of the animals they rescued aren't able to go back to the wild, so they have a few rescued pets.

They have a fox, who ended up blind after getting caught in a trap. His name is Red, and it likes to scare their mailman by screaming at him. Have you ever heard a fox? It's crazy AF!

They also have an owl inside the house. It was hit by a moving car, and it damaged its wing, making it unable to fly. Its name is Big eyes, and sometimes it chills with Shishida in the library.

They also have a wild horse on the back. They called it Hone, in dedication to Honenuki because when the Hone smiles, which it does a lot, its smile looks like their ex-classmate.

Hone was rescued from a circus, and is now living a retirement on their home.

AU - Tarzan AU

So, you might read Tarzan AU, and think:

"Well, Shishida could make a good Tarzan. He is wild, hairy, curious, and kind of look likes bigfoot when he uses his quirk. It makes sense that he would be Tarzan,"

But you are wrong. This is a different Tarzan AU.

For once, it happens in the woods instead of the jungle. So our Tarzan is closer to civilization than the classic.

Koda was just a small three-year-old when, on a camping trip, their parents died. They were crossing a stream when the bridge broke, and they feel into the river. Their parents drown and died of hypothermia, but Koda somehow survived.

They were taken care of by the animals. Because, yes, they speak in this AU, but only Koda can understand them.

Koda lives like a cryptid, and becomes an urban legend of the woods. They are known as the creature-man. Many go into the woods to get a peak or a capture them on a picture.

The people know them to be a generous being. If you get lost in the woods, they will guide you back home. If you get hurt, you may find yourself healed by the next morning.

Shishida is new in town, recently graduated from college and has a psychology degree.

He doesn't believe in the existence of creature-man, and thinks it's just a tourist attraction. 

The rest of the town tries to convince him, but he is a stubborn one.

But one day, a couple of his friends invite him on a hike on the woods. They are hoping that with this trip, he might start believing in Creature-man.

The storm catches them by surprise. It comes out of nowhere, and it makes Shishida slip and roll down a hill. He hits his head on and blacks out, but when he wakes up, he is not alone.

Koda found him and started taking care of him. Shishida had a concussion and a broken arm, so Koda couldn't take him back out of the forest.

Shishida, now an absolute believer of Creature-man, takes them to his home, to re-introduce them to society.

He starts by cleaning them and dressing them, but it's not as easy as he believed it would be. Koda is afraid of everything, and knows nothing of the world.

Shishida doesn't tell the rest of the town about having their cryptid creature on his home. He knows that they will freak out and want to see him, and that could overwhelm Koda.

But one day, Koda freaks out, and runs back to the forest. The whole town finds out, and questions Shishida.

He explains that Koda, is not a creature, but a person who grew up in the woods and was not introduced into society.

The people decide to leave Koda alone, but Shishida feels a deep conection with them. He feels responsable for them, and doesn't want to see them hurt.

He visits them daily, and starts writing a psychology book on them.

Fanon Opinion

I can't see Koda having sex.

I just can't. Maybe it's their shy demeanour, their muteness or the way they look, but I can't see it.

I think I might headcanon them as asexual to much for me to picture him in sexual acts.

I think this is a cute couple, but it's very cracky.

There is no content for them. No pictures, nothing written, there isn't even a ship name.

I think that whoever requested these two, took somebody from class A and then somebody from class B that is not that known, and paired them together.

They have only one interaction, when they faced against each other on the A vs B battle. 

But, weirdly enough, they make sense together.

They are the personification of looks like they could kill you, but it's a cinnamon roll x looks like a cinnamon roll, and it's a cinnamon roll.

If there ever is a veterinarian x librarian AU, they would be perfect for it.

Like, Koda is super sweet and shy, and Shishida is a gentleman, who dresses in suits.

 I think they also make sense to me due to their quirks. 

Shishida looks like an animal when he is all big and hairy, and Koda can talk to animals.

It's a weird ship, however.

But it definitely deserves more love.

It's also not that impossible to happen. They are the same age, they go to the same school, they are in the same career, same side.

I know this is short, but there is nothing to go on with this couple.

It's a background character with an even less important character.

[friendocheaven]

Picnic Ask

Ask and ye shall recieve @theaxolotleastofthesun it’s long af tho, so it’s under the cut.

 1.       Where and When is the picnic happening? (Gonna take this as ideal location and season basically)

a.       Milo: Prefers someplace a bit south—warmer than the northern parts of the Eye. Summer in Sun Elf territory would be nice. Not south enough to get jungle-y and humid (Glim can take heat, but draws the line at humidity), but someplace he could retreat to the blessed relief offered by the shade of a scrubby tree and have a good excuse to eat his favorite spicy foods and sweat to cool down.

b.      Glim: as stated above, he doesn’t do well in high humidity. Also not the biggest fan of excessive heat, but will put up with it for Milo’s sake. Were it up to him though, he would prefer an autumn picnic in a cozy shady glen under a still-full canopy of rich reds and violets and sunny yellows. A sigh of crisp wind carrying with it the first hint of winter.

c.       Remmi: Love’s spring, especially when it’s still early. They love the way the fruit trees look while still flowering and the cool, but warming, breeze. They would most enjoy something near water, but with plush green grass still under foot. The Northern Reservoir is well tended, with bright, blossoming bushes hedging cobbled pathways. The surrounding park stretches most of the way ‘round. Remmi would most like a quiet day at the eastern edge—farthest away from the great roaring falls that lead into the canyon. Bonus if there are frogs.

d.      Hani: Loves the dead heat of summer; the feel of warm sun on his skin. A midsummer, late afternoon picnic after a day of splashing around the Southern Sea would be heaven. Sure, the food might get a little sandy, but it wouldn’t stop him from eating and enjoying every second.

2.       What food and drinks do your OCs bring? (you fool! You’re enabling me to indulge my fascination with food culture!)

a.       Milo: Goes all out on the spice—picnic with him at your own peril. He packs extra-hot kimchi, seasoned roasted garlic cloves, Zevi’s falafel recipe, and a few other side dishes that reflect his upbringing by a Southern Dwarf familiar with Halfling food culture. He also gets pretty excited with drinks, bringing three; an iced ginger tea made with turmeric and black pepper, buttercup and honey hwachae (most non-halflings just call it wine even though it’s usually not alcoholic) because he’s (not so) secretly pretty sappy and sentimental, and Baekse-ju to finish off with a good pair for spicy food and just a touch of alcohol.

b.      Glim: Settles for light, seasonal snack foods. He brings a bunch of fresh cut in-season fruit like apples (that yes, he does cut the skins to look like bunnies like his mother used to), a couple loaves of bara brith made with ground dried fruits and nuts served with butter, and a whole basket of pic ar y maen (cookies with raisins and currants mixed in). He brings spiced virgin cider and a fine local white wine to wash it down.

c.       Remmi: As a professional baker, they refused to bring anything but their best to their picnic. They pick finger-food pastries—the best from their eclectic cooking experience and travels. Beignets topped with honey and powdered sugar—in a basket enchanted to keep them fresh and hot and crisp because they take pride in their work. An impressive assortment of petit fors lined up and packed tightly in another container. Muffuletta finger sandwiches with toothpicks holding them together for the more savory inclined guests. And finally some cranberry pastila which they hadn’t made in years and was their way of flexing their baker’s muscles. They pack a thermos of milk tea and an iced chocolate drink.

d.      Hani: not a big cook. He was hoping Senya would do most of the cooking. It’s not like he’s particularly picky about what he ingests. To be polite though, he brings a crock of bamia—a stew with lamb, okra, tomatoes, and onion—that his mother would make on special occasions. He also brings an impressive array of drinks; sugar cane juice, carob juice, tamarind juice, and iced coffee.

3.       What are your OC’s wearing to the picnic?

a.       Milo: Largely his usual sort of outfit. A sleeveless turtleneck, cargo capris, and combat boots. He does add a lightweight cotton shawl embroidered with geese in shades of red that he got as a wedding gift from Lian. He wears it to avoid sunburn, but once in the shade and eating, he carefully folds it and sets it aside so it doesn’t get dirty.

b.      Glim: A cream colored tunic and brown tasseled cardigan over dark blue leggings, simple but sleek black ankle boots, and finished off with a simple sapphire teardrop pendant on a gold chain.

c.       Remmi: they opt for something simple and comfortable, but fitting for the season. They wear a yellow wide-band tank top under an oversized baby pink cable knit sweater. The sweater is so big it slouches off one shoulder, reaches their knees, and the sleeves hide their hands if they aren’t scrunched up at the elbow. They pair that with slim, washed out jeans, and a pair of tan slouchy boots. As one final touch, they don cherry blossom studs in their ears.

d.      Hani: he goes for something sporty and comfy. A loose and flowy off-white sleeveless crop top over a pair of baggy gray-blue shorts held round his hips by a broad and colorful sash and a pair of greek sandals that he discards almost immediately. To add a touch of class—after all this is a fun outing so why not—he wears golden arm bands just above each bicep. Those stay on longer, but they, too, eventually get unceremoniously dumped into the picnic basket in favor of total comfort.

4.       Which OC brings a musical instrument to idly play?

a.       Surprisingly enough, Hani. Remmi knows a little piano and harp, but those aren’t exactly available at a picnic. Milo has never learned an instrument (though he finds guitar interesting). And Glim tried playing, but sucked at just about everything; and anything he could play he couldn’t play in front of others. Hani, on the other hand, randomly knows how to play—and is good at—the oud (which is like an Arab lute). And yes, he does attempt to play Wonderwall on it.

5.       How quickly does your OC realize there are ants trying to sneak into their food? What do they do about it?

a.       Milo: He’s very perceptive, so it doesn’t take long for him to notice. He proceeds to squish them then mix them into his food for “extra protein” without hesitation. Despite knowing that Milo was raised eating bugs and still does fairly regularly, everyone still looks at him like he’s gone insane.

b.      Glim: He picks up on it when someone else points it out. It’s only then that he realizes that he forgot to activate the insect repellent rune. He curses under his breath and apologizes before quickly moving the picnic supplies a few meters away and activating it then.

c.       Remmi: They spend the whole picnic low-key looking out for this. Whenever bugs start walking toward or flying around their precious gourmet picnic, they nonchalantly close all the containers up tight then swat them all away without breaking the conversation.

d.      Hani: he doesn’t notice until one of the ants bites his tongue as he’s eating. He spits that one out because it was mean, but all subsequent ones he eats. And unlike Milo, Hani doesn’t mix them into anything, he just pops them into his mouth.

6.       Which OC hides under the shade at first before being convinced to come out into the sun? How do they react?

a.       Glim hates the heat. If you can manage to convince him to leave the tranquility of shade, he will be a drama queen about it. Really laying it on thick and moaning about how “the sun is a white hot laser” against his “poor fragile flesh” and that if he continues on he will surely “burn up, dry out, and die!” and other such dramatic nonsense. He gets weirdly poetic when he’s frustrated or cranky. Needless to say, Milo has ceased pushing the issue.

7.       Imagine your OCs spending their time picking nearby wildflowers and watching the butterflies and bees at work.

a.       Milo foregoes this particular activity, choosing this time instead to just take in the scenery. He’s scared he might upset a hive or get stung or bitten by something so he’d rather just sit back and soak up the atmosphere.

b.      Glim is carefully rooting around for four leaf clovers under a subdued parasol.

c.       Remmi carefully plucks and cuts an armful of flowers and stems so they can make colorful flower crowns for everyone.

d.      Hani chases the bugs and small animals, not unlike a dog would. But he’s having fun so it’s fine.

8.       Which OC foregoes a picnic blanket and sits directly on the ground? Are they concerned by the grass stains on their clothes afterwards?

a.       Hani doesn’t care where he plants his butt and cares almost as little about stains.

9.       Which OC brings a chair because they can’t stand the thought of sitting on the ground?

a.       Remmi, but a lot of it is because they don’t want to risk getting their clothes too dirty and also because the ground is never as soft and even as you think or hope. So sitting on the ground, even on a blanket, hurts their butt.

10.   Imagine your OCs falling asleep after eating their food, content and happy.

a.       Milo is one of the first to nod off and lays down in the shade. He kicks his shoes off and lets the sun warm his feet while the shade keeps his face cool. He wakes up to groggily help pack everything back up.

b.      Glim doesn’t actually fall asleep. He just sort of zones out while playing with Milo’s hair and enjoying the breeze.

c.       After loading up on carbs, Remmi dozes off in their chair and wake up with a tender sunburn spread across their nose and cheeks. They vow to never fall asleep in the sun like that again, but they make the same mistake next time.

d.      Hanni has seemingly boundless energy throughout the day, which is a bit unusual for him as he often naps a lot when the sun is out, but is wired by the time the moon replaces it. As soon as they’ve packed everything up and are headed home, though, the excitement wears off and he crashes hard. He’s asleep the whole way back.

[a-collection-of-villainous-aus]

Coffee Shop au part four

(Segment one of three)

If I forget to tag something important please tell me.

(Present day)

(Small warning Acylius does use those he tortures for food for other demons and non mortal creatures to consume so if you have a problem with that then um just keep scrolling I guess ^^; )

What was this…that strange feeling of disappointment at seeing Black Hats chair being vacant; after all he’d only been there twice so it was not as if he was a regular customer, especially as they’d only been open for two days.

Why should the old demon stay until closing time anyway, just because he did it on the first day didn’t mean he’d do it again today, he had no reason to stay…Black Hat had been rather forward though, kissing him like that, not that he was complaining but , he wasn’t one to just play around and be used.

Friends with benefits was one thing, at least you knew where you both stood, and yet still, why did it feel so familiar, an old dream perhaps, after all who didn’t at least have one wet dream about the great Black Hat doing sordid things to your body right.

Especially with tentacles, while wearing priest robes.

Yes he had his kinks, but damn you if you tried to shame him for them.

He huffed, shoulders going slump, no this was ridiculous , feeling sad just because that idiot of a Gremlin just upped and left without so much as a good bye, Hat didn’t owe him anything and he didn’t owe Hat anything either.

Clearly he was crazy, he had finally fucking lost it, thinking of The Great Lord Black Hat owing him a good bye and a kiss on the cheek as if they were lovers, he’d just met the bastard.

No he needed to either relax or worry if the destroyer of worlds was going to ruin his café that’d he’d always wanted with his mischievous downright evil antics.

Acylius was currently grinding up their latest victim, a man who’d been abusing Nicodemus’s workers (don’t worry if you don’t know who that is I won’t be bringing him into this unless I need him for like filler scenes)

Body parts in neat piles on the counter top, ‘pork’ pies were on the menu tomorrow, this was Black Hat’s island so even the people knew some places the menu would cater to demons so if they saw the chalk was in red they knew it was demon cuisine, though of course there was always the daring person who’d ask for it anyway in which a waiver definitely had to be signed.

Hey, wasn’t going to be Acylius’s problem if they decided to off themselves on food that probably wasn’t for human consumption.

This particular man had been a pig and he was serving sow next week.

Vile beings needed to meet a vile end.

This was going to be a long night, he could manage though, at best he could manage on two nights of sleep during the week.

Currently the head of the meat sack was animated and still alive, the man was so far gone he’d reached that point of acceptance that this was happening and nothing could be done, so seeing his body being prepped for pastries and such was more amusing than anything.

“I’m a Legion demon Jake, that’s your name right?”

“Yeah.”

“So, anyway as I was saying I’m a Legion demon in this day and age that means nothing to most unless you are perhaps ancient or still follow the old ways, I have nothing to offer thee Great Lord Black Hat.”

Jake watched as the demon deboned, removed a hand and of his shaved one of his arms before washing it down to make sure all the hair was gone before slapping it into the mince meat maker.

“Last I heard your kind was like some kinda lucky charm right dude?”

“Yes, but he does not need that from me, if we did anything he would be interested in me for all of five minutes and bail, he is all shadows and darkness, I will literally spend weekends in my boxers eating cheese puffs if the week has been hard enough, hardly a turn on for someone like Black Hat.”

Acylius snapped while working on another piece.

“I dunno, some beings like to see their partners being able to feel that chill around them, but hey that’s just my jam you know, anyway stop whining, this guy is old as shit right, you don’t know, your Legion demon shit might actually put a huge boner in his pants.”

Jake taunted, smirking as he watched his killer bristle up, oooo hooo sensitive much.

You know those scenes in anime’s where the other character suddenly gets really tall, shadows where their eyes should be and their hair seems to just be blowing in the wind and there’s that broken glass sound sometimes.

That’s Acylius’s reaction as his mouth turns into a ground out grin that’s splitting wider and wider along where the scars are, ironically that injury is the reason he can smile this wide now when the demon in him starts to show.

Jake was going to die, he was already he dead he knew it so why not torment him just a little more and get it over with

“Awww no I know what it is baby demon, you want a daddy you can suckle on and-

Acylius brought the meat tenderiser down on Jake’s head repeatedly until there was only pulp left, brain matter and blood were splattered across his apron with a few deep scarlet streaks going across his cheek, how brightly the red stood out against the snow white skin.

He was staring at the mess he’d made, panting softly, pupils thin and biting his lip, alright maybe he’d enjoyed that a little too much, he frowned though when he saw the pies had been covered to, well perhaps they would still be salvageable.

Scraping the remains of the head into the bin marked biohazard he pulled the bag out and set it down getting rid of other pieces he no longer required, tomorrow non human waste disposal would be picking up the remains anyway.

Demencia had caught the show and was leaning on the door.

“Looks like you got a little too into that Lulu, sure you don’t want to tenderise me on the surface.”

(NOTE, Acylius’s nick name Lulu was made last year in November 2019 because my friend had trouble pronouncing his name, so I tried to think of a name that he’d only let close friends and loved ones call him and that’s where that comes from, not Helluva boss, just thought I’d point that out as there’s a Lulu world and Loo Loo land)

“Not now Demencia, I’m not in the mood for your jokes.”

Acylius ran his fingers through his hair, regretting it once he remembered oh yeah covered in blood; a shower would definitely be needed before bed.

“Ah I see, so the head got sassy huh?”

Flug, because yes reminder Acylius is Doctor Flug, paused at the backdoor and pouted

“Might have, he also said some very offensive words that I did not appreciate.”

Demmy folded her arms, shaking her head and smiling

“Well you showed that head who’s boss, now hurry up binch I want my cookies and hot chocolate, it’s late.”

Flug lovingly gave her the finger as he walked out the door while telling her she had two hands she could do it herself.

The back alley was dimly lit, not that he couldn’t see or choose to focus his vision to see clearer but sometimes it was nice just to appreciate light that softly glowed and curled around corners to take in the world in all different ways and settings…oh he missed rain, there hadn’t been any in nearly two months now, he missed how things glowed, street lamps became brighter and car lights so red and vibrant against the grey trailing along winding roads of shimmering black.

Perhaps it would soon when the snow had melted, he’d go for a long drive and listen to the rain hitting the roof of his car, patting against the windows, listening to the quiet tick, tick, tick of the vehicle when he switched on the indicator.

Yeah just drive out the middle of nowhere, strip down and run in the rain or just let it soak into his clothes as his breath streamed out in wispy clouds…

Ears twitching he heard a late party of drunks making their way home, he watched them pass by, they were completely unaware of him, if he were perhaps a rabid sort of demon they would be easy pickings, but that was not his game, at least not tonight, there was no scent that told him a wrong doing had been done, just a group of friends heading home for bed.

Snow had fallen in the tracks left by the bustling day life of the people around here and now in the silence he wondered was he lonely, Demencia’s offers had sometimes had been all too tempting simply out of need for comfort and to be close to someone, sometimes it seemed she needed it just as much as he did when they’d just lean on each other and complain about their day.

Looking up he found someone watching him from the shadows, well more saw a pair of eyes, completely yellow, no white to be seen, oranges and reds, as if he were looking at the sun, shivering as a breeze rolled through he pulled down his sleeves, goose bumps rising, a tingling down his spine, just the little things that reminded him he was alive, he was not afraid of what lingered in the shadows, there was no sense of danger.

Perhaps they were a Legion fan , someone caught off guard by his appearance, after all Flug knew his scars could be quiet unsettling to some people…though come to think of it he did sense an air of fear about this being, still they were wide and unmoving.

Really the sensible thing to do would be to just go inside and ignore this creature, yet something kept him there a longing to talk to it, placing the garbage into the bins he smiled just a little

“You know stranger, you remind me of someone…someone I feel like I should know.”

Acylius’s ears lay flat as he heard them softly whimper, it sounded so sad.

“I am sorry, I was not being offensive I assure you, this person I speak of was very kind, at least he was in the dream, I dreamt when I was little , funnily enough a night like this, Mother had locked me out…”

He held one hand in the other looking at them, fingers curling around his thumb

“My fingers were so cold and red I could barely feel them, or the rest of myself to be honest…heh you probably do not want to hear the tired ramblings of an out of date demon.”

“No, please continue.”

There was silence again, that whispered voice, it comforted him, made him feel at ease, this indeed truly was a strange day.

“Mother had locked me out, I didn’t cry or beg her to let me back in, I knew she would not open the door, so I laid down cheek to the snow, despite being almost numb my face burned, my face…”

Tracing along his scars as he recalled the moment could not help but wince

“I had to be careful still they had barely healed by that point, but I remember how good the cold felt on them, red and angry they seemed to only be satisfied when pressed to the freezing earth, I knew that night or at least believed I was going to die and…I was alright with that until I saw a pair of eyes just like yours.”

Acylius took a step forward only stopping when he saw this being step back

“They were gold, I thought they were so beautiful , I thought maybe the angels we were told about were not so bad if they could come for something like me, his claws hands reached down for me but I didn’t see his face, all I heard was that I was coming home with him and his name…his name was…”

Acylius held his head in his hands, scrubbing them down his face

“His name was Cruentus.”

When he looked back at where the eyes had been there was only darkness, the demon in the dark had disappeared so quickly he wondered for a moment if they’d even been there.

No, nope, nope, that dream was not real, that being was not Cruentus, it was all coincidence and he was just exhausted, yes that was it, perhaps he should sleep tonight, or maybe he’d snacked on too much of Jake while he was working, or had too many sugary treats either way, it was pies in the fridge and off to bed.

Opening the back door he locked it behind him, ignoring the fact Demencia was chomping on one of the pies, after all she knew what was in them if she wanted to eat it that was up to her, his mind was elsewhere.

“Mmmm you tenderized this one good, Legs, nice and juicy.”

Usually her friend would react to that name, at least grunt or gently nudge her and tell her not to call him that, something was clearly bothering Acylius.

“Legs?”

Demencia asked gently, placing a hand on his shoulder, only for him to turn and pick her up by the front of her shirt, snarling as he did so

“Do not call me that name!”

Looking down at him, Demencia could really see something wasn’t right here, was he remembering something to do with that name, like it had always annoyed him, but that glare, the disheveled hair and fangs all bared …honestly in another situation he would be hot as fuck…alright she was already thinking he looked hot as fuck but this was not the time or place.

Touching Acylius’s face lightly, she watched as his ears flicked, his breathing was ragged, his eyes returning from being solid blue to having pupils and irises again, her hands were warm and comforting and he found himself leaning into them, lips pressed against her palm…she was there to ground him in his bad moments and he could never thank his friend enough for that.

“You mind setting me down you tree.”

Demencia laughed softly.

He carefully set her back down and pulled her in for a hug

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I would never hurt you, never.”

Nuzzling against his chest and wrapping her arms around him, patting his back

“Hey, hey now, none of that you dumb tree, I know you have gaps in your memory, did you remember why do you don’t like that name?”

“Hate, I don’t just dislike that name, I hate it…all I can hear is someone called Vincent and they make me curl up and die, I have no face only a voice, if I ever heard it…I would know…”

Flug was quiet, taking in just how small she was against him, reminding him how small most were against him like this, his talons formed, slowly stroking her hair, playing with the fuchsia overlay, down to her neck where it faded to lime green, such an interesting choice of colours to wear in ones hair.

“You already know I just appeared back into existence, as if the world itself birthed me, I was somewhere forgotten…and seeing Black Hat today, I think…no it is a stupid notion to think he could see me as anything.”

He kissed the top of her head, thankful that she had not let go, Demencia was the one being who never seemed to be afraid of him, who he knew he could trust and rely on in these moments where memories were trying to break through the surface and suffocated when they could not make it.

“I am a Legion demon, no more than a trinket in the end, I am a nothing in his world and I am okay with that, I have a nice peaceful life and a coffee shop just like I always wanted…”

He sat with her on the counter, as she sat on one of his thighs

“This is just a hug, you don’t need more right?”

Demmy enquired, slightly hopeful because who didn’t want to climb him, honestly, he was an idiot for not seeing he didn’t need to be some grand demon to be wonderful.

“Yes, just a hug…I wish I could say I grew up in a loving home with Christmases like in the movies, that I could tell you my life’s story, talk about a time I scraped my knee when I was small and had a mother who put cute cat plasters on me just because I like cats.”

She listened and let him stroke her hair, it’d always calmed him to pet soft things, so perhaps she might use shampoos that were just a little pricier than she’d usually buy simply to make sure her hair was soft for these broken moments no one else saw.

Even though he was not sobbing, made no notion he was crying, the damp warmth on her shoulder told her otherwise.

“I want to tell you the times my Father took me for ice cream, my first kiss with the person I fell in love with, something…anything, but there’s nothing there.”

She listened attentively until he had nothing left to say, carefully taking his hand from her scalp; Demencia held his face and looked at him

“Damn Sillyus, they really did send you back with nothing more than a leaflet.”

“I suppose, but I have so much to thank you for, when you found me on that street, I only remembered enough to get by, to survive, but you helped me to settle into this time and be a part of the modern world.”

Acylius kissed her forehead before pressing his to hers, eyes closed as he whispered

“I’m so tired of being lost, of being unsure of what I am, who I am, I just want to bake, make coffee and kill people in my basement, I think fortune smiled on me for a moment when you found me, I think I might just give you the world if you asked.”

“Awww come on dude, sounds like a love confession here, I have bills to pay off and knew there was a darker side in me, you’re the Sweeny to my Lovett.”

She teased fondly, lightly smacking the back of his head, smiling as he managed a laugh

“I guess I could agree platonically with that.”

“But honestly Slender Man, babe if you wanted to plant your tentacles and leave your seed in me I wouldn’t say no.”

Acylius rolled his eyes and shook his head, using a tea towel to wipe his face

“Honestly woman you are bloody hopeless.”

“Yeah but you love me all the more for it.”

She grinned punching him playfully on the shoulder

“Perhaps I do, but I am not as hot as you like to say I am, I hide my face, I hate when people look at my scars and pity me.”

Demmy raised a brow and climbed off of his leg, flicking his forehead

“I know you like to hide your face behind glamour and tricks but you’re beautiful even if you don’t see it dumbass, I’m starting to wonder what the fuck happened outside that had you coming back in as if someone stole your last apple crown and there’ll never be another one again on the face of the planet.”

She put the kettle on and took out the upside down pineapple cake; this was definitely a cake and tea situation

“First of all, do not say such blasphemous things, life would not be worth living without apple crowns, second of all…I think, I know I said there’s nothing there but I think I might have had a memory about my childhood involving Cruentus.”

Demencia nearly dropped the mug she was holding, setting it down she turned to face him

“Holy fucking shit, you mean thee fucking Cruentus, Hellhound butler, Hell Knight, works for the brooding clearly wants you to nail his ass Black Hat, that Cruentus…ahh I hear he has eyes like the fucking sun.”

Acylius gave her a deadpan look, hands on hips as he stood, looming over her, trying to look seriously only for it to falter

“You Demmy are just horny on main.”

“So what if I am? Gonna call me a slut like my last partner?”

She swatted away his playfully prodding hand.

“No, I never understood why it’s perfectly fine for men to have as many partners as they wish but seen as something terrible when a woman just wants to enjoy her life the same way, society is mad…also no more jokes on Black Hat you wicked beastie.”

Demencia would be lying if she didn’t admit his ability to shift from one mood to the other sometimes made her head spin, but it was clear he’d needed that moment to talk, shrugging she turned back to the kettle

“Alright, alright I’ll behave at least for now, I mean it’s clear the big bad doesn’t want you, how could he possibly want you…even though anyone with eyes could see he kept checking you out and every single coffee you brought him in hopes your stupid number was on it somewhere.”

Demencia couldn’t help but stifle a giggle at his sounds of huffing and frustration and heard him sit at the table, she did know there was stories, legends really by this point of Cruentus having a son, but you literally had to pour through footnotes and any books that might have had more information had been removed from shelves and privatized under the order of Black Hat himself.

End of segment one

(I'll try and type up segment two tomorrow)

[youseissi]

The Dark Witch Next Door

𝘚𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺:

The man that just moved in next to Hongjoong might be too kind for his own good and the witch's totally not worried about him.

or

Kim Hongjoong is a dark witch that specializes in potions and when herbs from his garden keep going missing he's pretty sure Park Seonghwa is the culprit. After all who else would need fern flowers besides the white mage living next door.

Pairings: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa

Tags:

Alternate Universe - Witchcraft, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Magic, Onesided Enemies to Lovers, Light Angst, someone dies but not really, tsundere hongjoong, Necromancy

Notes: This is the first story in a series of short stories for a witch au.

Warnings: Non descriptive gore (necromancy).

Arcana Series: TDWND ✧ TWND ✧ TBC ✧  AO3

Hongjoong counts the little sprouts on the garden floor. He finishes and starts over not quite satisfied. And then one more time. A couple of them were missing. Again. It took weeks to grow those and every single time at least a couple of them went missing, if not up to half of the batch and he needed those. He didn’t have time to wait for another month to continue to brew his potions.

He knew who always did this and, unlike that doofus, he had actual clients to tend to. Saying that Hongjoong, the village's dark witch, was furious was an understatement.

“Having problems with wild animals again?” His neighbour’s annoyingly angelic voice sounded over the fence. Ha. As if it wasn’t that little familiar of his that snatched all his ingredients away.

“I guess so, you don’t happen to know anything about it, do you?”

“Haven’t I answered this question a few too many times before? My answer haven’t changed.” Seonghwa replied, a soft smiled contradicting the tone of his words.

“Yes, yes I know. I just feel the need to ask since these herbs…”

“Are very important ingredients for very expensive potions, I’m aware.” The white mage completed his phrase with a chuckle, having heard the speech way too often. “I really don’t know anything, but I’ll let you know in case I do.”

His two tailed cat chose this moment to cut in between them, sprinting between Hongjoong’s feet and jumping onto the fence, mewling quietly for its owner and Seonghwa promptly took it in his arms excusing himself.

Hongjoong just hummed in response, going back to tend to his destroyed garden. One day he would catch the older in the act, he promised to himself mindlessly as he plucked the remaining blossoms and replaced them with new seeds. It had to be him, after all who else would need fern flowers besides the white mage living next door.

✦

“That’ll be fifteen gold pieces for a good harvest potion, per field of course.” Hongjoong declared matter of factly as he wrote down on a piece of paper with his crow feather quill, doing the math for how much the final price would be.

“Can’t you lower your price? Isn’t that a little too expensive? People are dying, you know.”

Yes, he knew. Tough luck, that was the cycle of life for a mere mortal, get over it. He couldn’t lower his price for a simple reason like that as Magic wasn’t free for him either. Every single ounce of mana needed a sacrifice to be turned into magic. No matter the use, it had a price, always and forever that was the universal truth for every supernatural being. So the whole town could die if that was the case, but he was getting paid for his sacrifice.

“I’m aware of the situation, this is the best price I can do and it’s already severely lowered. Also I need at least half the pay beforehand for ingredients. Would you like some tea while you go over the papers?”

“Sure…”

Hongjoong didn’t stay out of the room for long, just quick enough to grab the already boiling kettle and pour the tea onto some fancy china cups he used for clients, but immediately he knew something was amiss when he stepped back into his living room.

“Have you reached a decision?” He asked with a fake condescending smile.

“I- I’ll speak to the other farmers.” The villager sitting at his couch mumbled.

“Okay, just decide before the next moon cycle or it’ll damage the quality of the spell.” Hongjoong warned eager to get it over with, gathering the papers from the table before getting up to show his client to the door.

He opened the door facing away from his seated guest slowly, stalling a bit until he heard surprised gasps turn into loud screams. The smile in his face turned genuine as he turned back to face the distraught villager.

“What have you done to me?” His guest exclaimed frightened off his mind as he stared at his arms, little mushrooms growing not only there, but all over his body. A harmless prank, if you ask Hongjoong he deserved much worse.

“A little curse, this one for free even! I don’t take kindly to thieves around here, if you could please put back the bottles you took from under the window sill.” The dark witch replied with a fake sweet tone, smiling wide.

“Here, here just stop it please!” The man took out of his jacket pocket a few bottles and even a little jar of stardust that he hadn’t noticed it was gone, surely more valuable than any service the man could buy. Tending to humans was so bothersome, perhaps he’d only take requests from unworldly beings from now on.

“Good boy, now come closer so I can undo the curse.” Hongjoong commanded.

Naively the man rushed to his side and the witch only pushed him out the door, swiftly closing and locking it up on his face.

The man knocked loudly and yelled angrily, with empty threats of burning his house or some other stereotypical bravado humans liked to throw at them. A real witch has nothing to fear against such bigoted ideas, as if his small territory wasn’t strongly protected already.

He giggled as he took the cups back to the kitchen. On one of his windows the neighbour’s cat sat there staring judgmentally, his two tails swinging uncoordinatedly against one another. Not that he expressed any judgment, but Hongjoong just felt his disapproval somehow.

“What? It’ll wear off in a week, stop staring at me.” He excused his actions annoyed.

The cat only started back, letting out a yawn and pawning at his ears. The back of his paws a familiar blue and green that could only be found on the dark witch’s yard.

“You little…”

The smart kitty ran away before he could finish cursing under his breath.

✦

Usually at that time he'd be having tea with the herb thief that was his neighbour. Not that he enjoyed his company or anything, or at least he wouldn't admit to it, it just became their ritual not long after he moved in. Seonghwa knocked at his door with a basket of baked goods inviting him out for a cup on his first day and it stuck. The man might be a petty thief, but he did make great cookies.

The dark witch came out to his front yard with a spring in his step that day, excited to confront Park Seonghwa about his sneaky familiar. He had caught the pesky little animal red handed! He even brought out his favourite cups, brewed his fancier tea leaves, the ones he had imported from lands far beyond their little edge of the forest, and spiked it just the littlest bit with alcohol. Hongjoong was one to celebrate his victories in life no matter how small they were.

Yet as tea time approached Seonghwa’s voice sounded through the fence just out of his sight, covered by the wall of mismatched planks that were higher at the side of his small outdoors resting area. It seemed the white mage had guests. Rude ones for that matter, did no one respect tea time anymore these days? A sacrilege if you asked him.

“Oh dear, what has happened to you?” The mage asked, concern loud and clear on the other side.

“The evil dark witch! He has bestowed an horrible curse upon myself, can you believe it? But that is not the reason I come to you today, no need to worry about such trivial matters.” A familiar gruffy voice answered and Hongjoong groaned quietly at the reappearance of his former client, if the cheapskate could even be called that. Humans like this one just did not know when to give up.

“I’m sure he must’ve had a reason, have you done something to offend him again?” Seonghwa still seemed very concerned with that matter regardless it seemed.

“Not a thing! I swear that witch is the devil.” The villager exclaimed as if it was true and Hongjoong had to remind himself that it was rude to interject into conversations he was not invited to. It took him all his self control as he had quite a few things to say, most of them not pretty words, that's for sure.

“You should be more careful from now on, let me take care of this for you.”

A moment went by without voices, Hongjoong sipping on his tea slowly. Seonghwa’s tea would get cold if he didn’t hurry up, the witch thought impatiently.

“Oh, honorable white mage, I’ll forever be in debt to your generosity.”

Tch, his curse wouldn’t get to last a week it seemed. The overly polite flair in that man words annoyed Hongjoong so much he considered muting the man for a few days. Give him a scare that made him think twice before speaking.

“That’s nothing, please. Now why have you come here? You mentioned you had something to ask before.”

“I fear I might fall into even greater debt for I’ve come to ask for a favor, if you’d be so kind to hear me out.”

A favor? If it was the same he had asked from the dark witch than that man really had no shame downplaying a service like this. Seonghwa shouldn’t have bothered undoing his curse, now it’ll only waste him more energy to cast a new one. Making little of a witch’s work, there was no worse offence and Hongjoong was expecting the white mage to repay the man in kind.

But it did not come, the situation developing in the complete opposite he’d expect. The man did ask for an enchantment that assured a good harvest, the last few ones having been miserable it seemed, and the village starved under his rule. Seonghwa seemingly empathetic agreed to go and asses the situation for him, to see if there was anything he could do and of course there was.

The way Seonghwa was talked to unsettled the dark witch, he’d better charge a great sum, because of course he could help and at a much quicker and effective manner than Hongjoong could. But at greater cost as well.

If he were to do something to this degree for free, where would he draw the line? There was a difference between being kind to being a pushover and it needed to be clear. At least that's the work ethic witches had to live by, magic was an expensive craft after all.

Soon enough the sky began to darken, Hongjoong not quite knowing if he should just go back inside. It wasn’t like they had arranged anything, he only came out to his yard out of habit. Who would even want to meet Park Seonghwa, the stupid fern flower thief that kept undoing his curses? Not him, that’s for sure. The fancy tea he had put out for him had gone bitter after the first hour anyway.

The witch was about to go back inside, the dishes floating back through the window at a wave of his hand when Seonghwa finally appeared, passing by the dirt road in front of his house.

“Oh, Joongie! Have I made you wait? I’m sorry, I should’ve let you know I’d be busy.” The older said with regret, but all Hongjoong could focus on was since when did the white mage called him by Joongie ? It short-circuited his brain for a few seconds before he answered with a rosy tint to his cheeks.

“It's not like I was waiting for you, I was just enjoying my afternoon tea. I finally made some from that exotic blend you’ve been nagging me to make, but oh well guess it’s too late now.” Hongjoong downplayed it as he got up to follow the cutlery inside.

“Aw, you ought to make it again tomorrow.” Seonghwa whined bringing a hand to rest on Hongjoong’s shoulder to keep him there.

“Hmmm… I don’t know, I already wasted a lot of it today.” Hongjoong tried to answer calm and collected, but a thumb rubbing at the base of his neck had him sidetracked.

“Please? For me?” The white mage pleaded with his best puppy eyes and Hongjoong started feeling very suffocated all of a sudden, heat crawling up his neck and tightening his chest.

“Oh, get over yourself, Park Seonghwa.” Hongjoong muttered under his breath, inaudible to the older as he retreats inside hurriedly. Stupid charming mage with his stupid starry eyes. If his ears burned red it had nothing to do with him.

✦

He did not make the tea the next day, or the next one, or the next next one, or…

It had been over a week before a day came that Seonghwa did not start the day announcing he’d be busy and to not wait for him. Hongjoong appreciated the daily notice, as excessive as they sounded, not particularly curious for what was keeping the mage busy. It was probably just a busy time for his business.

When they finally sit down together again the long awaited reaction to his findings were quite underwhelming, the older just chuckled at how worked up he was, but Hongjoong did not relent.

“If I catch this little rascal anywhere near my herb garden again...” He threatened, trying to express how serious this was to him as he poured himself more tea.

“Yeosangie likes sweets, it’s not his fault! I’ll try to discipline him better from now on.” The white mage continued to make light of it with a soft smile, not convincing Hongjoong for one moment that he’d tell off his beloved pet.

The dark witch eyed the cat resting over his fence with distraught and Seonghwa made a motion for the cat to jump on his lap, stretching his arm to catch him into a protective hold as his shirt swayed around obnoxiously. Usually what would catch the witch’s attention was the veins popping in his hands, the way his collar bone poked from under his skin and his muscles flexing, Hongjoong wasn’t blind after all even if he liked to pretend he was.

But that wasn’t it today. Seonghwa quickly fixed himself, noticing where the other’s eye fell and how his expression turned sour.

“Working a lot lately?”

“Yes, I suppose it’s been busy.” The white mage averted his eyes.

“And getting fairly rewarded, I assume?” Hongjoong asked, even though he could guess the answer. He wanted to reach and touch the plethora of scars covering from the tip of the other's fingers up his forearms, he almost did.

Hongjoong was a dark witch for he poured his magic into potions and that dealt with the dead rather than the living. A technicality really, only categorized by the facts that all his ingredients were either already dead or would be by the time his potions were done.

Yet for white magic as it affected the living it required live sacrifices. Seonghwa didn’t look like the type to use animals and such, the practice was not well seen by the community to start with and he didn’t keep any besides the cat as far as Hongjoong knew. So there was only one source left to drive mana from. Himself.

“I only wish to help, it’s no trouble.” Seonghwa dismissed his worries with a weak smile.

Hongjoong considered it to be all the trouble, but oh well.

“You are an absolute fool Park Seonghwa.” His voice came out harsh and sharp, Seonghwa immediately hurt by then. Not offended, just sad to have upset the dark witch so much.

Hongjoong got up quickly to go back into his house not feeling in the mood for tea anymore, a pout and puffed cheeks hidden away from his companion.

✦

“Mister! Don’t you think you poured more blood on his field? Pour some more on mine too!”

“What?” Honestly Seonghwa was getting a lightheaded at this point, this was supposed to be the last one for the day.

“Oh, mine too! I don’t think you did enough today.”

“No! Mine is more important, don’t listen to them!”

“Wait, I’ll-” The white mage tried reasoning, but soon a crowd started forming and it wasn’t long before it started going out of control, no longer just words being used to try and grab his attention.

✦

The dark witch was drinking his precious tea with a different guest from faraway that eventful morning. Very far away considering how painfully slow it was to make a gateway from the underworld, be it through a spell or potion or however method used. It was a long time coming that meeting, months in the making.

The summoner in front of him talked excitedly about all the new pets he found on his latest journey there, eager to show the hellhound he had the pleasure to domesticate and Hongjoong was about to scold Mingi for even suggesting conjuring one on his living room close to all his precious tomes when he felt a crippling cold at the back of his neck, an eerie omen and he just knew something had to be wrong.

His neighbour's cat appeared tapping frantically at his window not an hour later, paw scratching at the glass with sharp screeches and desperate mews to catch his attention.

Oh, humans. Such selfish creatures, they just couldn't help themselves, could they? Once they found something that gave them even the littlest bit of edge over the others, any way to make their lives easier without working for it, they needed to capture it, hog it for themselves, grabbing and pulling without a care for the source.

And that was exactly what they did in this case with the treasure that was Park Seonghwa. The villagers fought nail and tooth for a piece of him, blunt claws showing themselves to paint the fields red till there was no more, leaving his remains to dry up. 'It can't be helped', they thought as their precious magic spell could no longer work for them, losing interest without a second thought.

With blood and flesh at his feet the dark witch saw red with rage, cursing at their fields, at the air they breathed and at the water they drank. He cursed and cursed till there was nothing left uncursed, loud cries and screams sounding all throughout the small village cursing back at him uselessly, but they did not dare raise a finger against him as they knew Hongjoong wouldn’t be merciful like their beloved white mage.

All the pain and misfortune that would befall the village served them right, the witch laughed through tears.

✦

“You’re so lucky I have a necromancer friend that owed me a favor.” Hongjoong continued to tell off the white mage that struggled to look up at him with the unusual height difference, his head laying on their garden table surrounded by flowers to cover the gruesome details of his severed neck.

“Yes, yes I’ll be sure to repay Wooyoung properly once I’m back on my feet.” Quite literally, the bodiless head meant. “Speaking of that, when do you think that will be?”

“It looks like it might take a while, we’re not paying for it after all. And he’s been very preoccupied lately with a jinx that went south.”

“Oh really?” The mundane chit chat was oddly nice, the witch had been extra prickly since the incident and Seonghwa had no choice, but to listen to his nagging now. Not that he minded, if asked he’d tell without an ounce of hesitance how much he loved to hear Hongjoong’s voice, be it sharp remarks or embarrassed squeals.

“He’s been using up all his energy trying to exorcise his boyfriend for a month now.” The dark witch commented absentmindedly as he stirred some powder into the bowl in his hands.

“Oh my, what a predicament. I think I have a spell that might-”

Seonghwa did not manage to finish his phrase as a spoon full of soup was pushed into his mouth.

“Even after all this you’re still wanting to help people? For free? Haven’t you learned your lesson?” Hongjoong asked incredulously.

“Haha, I’m sorry I guess it’s an habit.” The older just chuckled. “Are you mad?”

“I am! You need to take better care of yourself! It’s not like I really care about what you do or anything, but, you know… I- I… I don’t know what I’d do if you really died. Be more considerate.”

Seonghwa swore the blush in the younger’s cheeks was the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen. He might just die a few more times if it meant he got to hear such words and see the expression again.

“You’re too kind, Joongie.” The comment only earned him another forced spoonful of soup through his smile.

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you weigh less than 130 pounds? Yeah, quite a bit less.

Do you straighten your hair every day? No. I haven’t straightened my hair in years.

What kind of car do you drive? I don’t drive.

What’s your favorite kind of ice cream? Strawberry, mint chocolate chip, birthday cake, and cookies and cream are good. I haven’t had ice cream in quite awhile, though. 

Do you wear earrings daily? No. It’s been awhile since I’ve worn earrings as well. 

Do you prefer purple or green grapes? Green.

When’s the last time you got your eyebrows waxed? I only got them waxed once and I was like 14.

Have you ever been in a tanning bed? No. Talk about claustrophobia. And I have no desire to do so anyway. 

Did your last kiss mean anything to you? Yeah.

How’s your hair right now? It’s up in its usual messy bun.

Have you ever wanted to go to Australia? I would love to.

What’s your favorite fast food restaurant? I’m not as into fast food as I used to be, but the ones I go to when I do have it are Chick-fil-A, Carl’s Jr, McDonald’s, and Jack in the Box.

When’s the last time you washed your hands? A few hours ago.

Who were you with the last time you were drunk and where were you? I was with a group of friends in a hotel room I rented for my birthday back in 2013.

What is one thing within the last year that if it had gone differently you feel might have changed things now? If I had done some things I should have been doing and managing things better regarding some of my health related issues.

What is something that you associate with summer? The miserable heat.

Have you ever ran around outside completely naked? Uh, no. Absolutely not.

When you’re hungry, does your stomach hurt? Sometimes. My body is super dramatic like that. I’ll feel weak sometimes and it’s like omg stop acting like you haven’t ate in days.

Would you say that you have a nice smile? No.

Have you ever walked in on your parents doing something kinky? Ahhhh, no.

Do you use mouthwash? No.

Do you eat anything out of a box? Yeah.

When’s the last time the fire alarm in your house went off? It’s never gone off. The only time it has made noise is when the batteries need to be replaced.

Can you be trusted with secrets? Yes.

Pill to make you braver or one to make you smarter? Braver. I’d be able to get some things taken care of that I’ve put off because I’m anxious and scared.

Are you in a hurry to grow up? I am grown up at 31 I guess, but I’m in no hurry to get older. I was never in any hurry.

When was the last time you used a bar of soap? Yesterday when I showered.

Do you keep notes, drawings or letters that people give you? Yes. I’m big on that.

Have you ever been locked in a car with a bf/gf? No. How would we be locked in the car?

Have you had a bf/gf that you never kissed? No. 

How many true best friends are present in your life? No friends, but I have my family.

Do you currently have a significant other? Nope.

Do your parents approve of the people you hang out with? They never had an issue with any of my friends.

Would you be able to stand being in the same room as someone you hate? I don’t hate anyone, so.

Have you ever lost a close friend? Yes.

Think of your current or last bf/gf. Do you/did you love them? I did.

Has anybody criticized the way your significant other looked like? I’m single, but no one said anything about the way my exes looked.

Have you ever stayed up late talking to a bf/gf on the phone or online? Yes.

Do your friends like the people you date? Do their friends like you? They had an issue with Joseph because they saw what I didn’t want to see, which was that he was using and playing me and wasn’t treating me right. I haven’t had an issue with their friends.

Do your parents let you date, or do you sneak around? I’m 31 years old. I can’t blame my non-existent dating life on that haha.

Have you ever felt backstabbed by a close friend? Yes.

Do you have any handshakes with anybody? No.

Do you feel you can rely on anybody to always be there for you? I know my family will always be there.

Have you ever regretted ignoring anybody? I’ve pushed people away and messed up good things. :/

What has been the stupidest reason someone has broken up with you? Joseph just didn’t want to commit. He wanted me when it was convenient and when he felt like it.

Have you ever kissed someone in their bedroom, or in yours? No.

Has a friend of yours ever confessed their love to you? No.

Have you gone out with someone, then ruined the friendship you had before? My first boyfriend and I were good friends before we started dating and yeah it definitely changed things after.

Can you trust any of your friends at full capacity? No friends. I trust my family, though.

Is the word 'love' even in your vocabulary? Yes.

Who do you think is more confusing, males or females? People are confusing.

Have you written or drawn anything for somebody else? No.

Do you have any pictures of yourself with a bf/gf? I have photos of myself and my exes.

Do your friends know how to make you smile in tough times? My family does. My doggo always can.

Has anybody said they loved you, but you didn't love them back? Yes.

Is there anyone you don't like that always seems to be everywhere you are? No.

Is there anyone you care about more than you care for yourself? My family.

What/who do you take the most pictures of? My doggo.

How long did you spend in a vehicle today? I’m not going anywhere today. 

When you make a mess are you more likely to clean it up right away, or do you get to it later? I clean it up right away.

Who do you blame for your bad mood today? I’m just annoyed because yesterday I slept until 6PM and today I’ve hardly slept at all, I kept getting up like every hour. It’s 10AM now and I first fell asleep around 6, so yeah not much sleep going on. :/

By what age would you like to be married? I don’t plan on getting married.

What are you looking forward to right now? Nothing at this moment.

Do you have any split ends? Yes.

Is there a book you're currently reading? Yeah, I’m finishing up this book called, “Anything for You” by Marissa Finch.

Did you ever want to be a fashion designer? No.

When was the last time you went to the dentist? It’s been awhile. :/

The last time you cried, what was wrong? Oh ya know, life.

Do you sleep with a fan on? Yes, even now in the winter.

What's the last video game you played? Animal Crossing: New Horizons. 

What do you usually drink at meals? Coffee or water.

Are you going to a library tomorrow? No.

Do you sleep better during thunderstorms? No, but I do enjoy them.

Has anyone pissed you off based on their actions recently? Yes.

What language did you take up in high school? I took Spanish all 4 years.

You’re single, correct? Yep.

Is the last person you texted good looking? My mom is beautiful. 

At this very moment, what exactly are you doing? Besides the obvious I’m listening to an ASMR video.

How do you feel about girls smoking? I don’t care what gender is doing it, I personally don’t like it.

Have you ever been in a perfect relationship? No. Perfect relationships don’t exist.

Is the person you last texted in a relationship? Yeah, my mom is with my dad.

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now? Nope.

Do you like “good morning” texts? I don’t get those.

Last movie you watched? Wonder Woman 1984.

Name something you like about winter: I love Christmastime, the weather, the clothes, the colors, the smells, the coziness...all of it.

What’s your favorite color? Pastels, rose gold, sea foam green, coral, and yellow.

Would you rather be called hun or baby? I don’t really care for either one.

Is there someone that you miss being close with? Yes.

Have you ever fallen asleep in someone’s arms? When I was little.

Does anyone completely understand you? I don’t think completely. I certainly don’t completely understand myself.

In the last 12 months can you say you truly cared about someone? My family.

You were single last month, why? Uhh, because I’m not interested in or talking to anyone in that way. Like, there’s literally no one right now. No one is interested in me either.

Would you rather get 1, 12, or 24 roses? I’d appreciate any amount.

What is something you like to do when you’re down? Cry and one of my go-to activities I do normally as a distraction.

Do you believe teenagers can fall in love? Sure.

Have you ever received a text message that made you cry? Yes.

Did you enjoy your summer? Last summer was even worse because I wasn’t able to go to the beach, which is the only thing I like about summer.

When you watch movies at home, do you like the lights on or off? I tend to just keep ‘em on.

Do you think relationships are even worth it? Yes.

Is any part of you sad at all? All of me.

Do you like your first name? Sure.

What’s most stressing right now? Health and life stuff.

What are you listening to currently? An ASMR video.

Have you done anything embarrassing lately? Not recently.

Dark hair or light hair in the opposite sex? Whichever.

Do you judge people you don’t know? Not to the point that I don't want to get to know them, but yeah. <<< That’s a good way of putting it. Like, I think we all judge people to some extent and that’s normal and not always a bad thing, but some people are judgmental people and they make up their own assumptions and opinions without getting to know a person. They have their mind made up and it stops them from getting to know someone. 

Would you date a boy/girl if you knew they were capable of cheating on you? I guess anyone is capable of doing so, so it’s something that could possibly happen in any relationship. However, if I knew someone had in fact cheated before or was known for that, then no I would not. Even if they had cheated once it would be something I’d worry about happening to me.

Did you sleep alone last night? I always do.

If you could have one thing right now what would it be? I’m kinda hungry, but meh.

Would you rather have ten kids, or none? None, hands down. I don’t even want one kid, let alone TEN.

Do you tell your mom or dad everything? I tell my mom a lot.

Does it matter to you if your boyfriend or girlfriend smokes? It would absolutely matter to me if they smoked cigarettes.

Have you ever been hurt by someone you never thought would hurt you? Yes.

Do you have siblings? I have two brothers.

[allisondraste]

Temperance (37/42)

Pairing: Nathaniel Howe/ Female, Non-HoF Cousland

Story Summary: Nathaniel and Elissa were childhood friends, but time and distance tore them apart. In the aftermath of the Fifth Blight, and Ferelden’s Civil War, both Elissa and Nathaniel must attempt reconstruct their tattered lives. As a series of events lead them to be reunited, both are reminded of so many years ago when things were much simpler.

Chapter Summary:   Nathaniel arrives to Liss’ Joining just intime to catch her as she collapses.  He enjoys nothing the entire chapter lol. 

First Chapter

Previous Chapter

[AO3 LINK]

Vigil's Keep, 9:31 Dragon

Nathaniel stood, numb, ears ringing and heart throbbing in the silence that Liss left behind when she walked out the door.  He did not know what exactly he’d hoped to gain by spilling his soul to her as she prepared for a dangerous, potentially lethal ritual.  If he were honest, he had hoped for nothing other than to make amends, to be supportive. Perhaps it was selfish, but he also just wanted to see her, to comfort himself with her warmth.  He should have known better than to think it would be as simple as that, considering the threadbare composure split between them. Of course they’d both snapped, and the only hope of any sort of resolution and closure awaited on the other side of her Joining.  If there was an “other” side.

Every fiber of his being begged him to run away, to bury his feeling so deep inside himself that he would never bother her with them again.  It seemed so unfair, to ask her to have patience for someone as broken as he was, someone who had hurt her so much already. He could not expect her to give him more than she had already given, especially when it seemed that all he could offer in return were  apologies she didn’t want to hear.  

Nathaniel was pulled from his rumination by the sound of chanting, the Warden Oath, and his pulse jumped. Suddenly, he felt so absurd and ridiculous.  Liss stood alone in a room full of people she barely knew, facing potential death, and there he was in her bedroom with a half-eaten bag of cookies for company while he felt sorry for himself.   Was he truly considering abandoning her now, after swearing he’d be there for her? Was he really that cowardly and self-serving? Had he become so much like his father after all?

No.

He shook his head, and started toward the door.  He was no great man, no prince or knight in shining armor.  He was guilty of more mistakes than he could count, and Liss’ anger at him had been more than earned.  But he was a far better man than his father. He wouldn’t be running anywhere except down the hallway and a flight of stairs to stand by Liss’ side, to be an actual friend to her for the first time in almost a decade.  

By the time Nathaniel  reached the main hall, two recruits already lay on the floor, dead.  He wondered if they had families and loved ones, if they’d be missed.  They had to be important to someone, and yet, he could hardly focus on their sacrifice as Liss took the chalice in her hands, eyes wide and watering.  She’d just watched two men die doing just as she prepared to do and she was pale, trembling, glancing around the room frantically searching for something, someone among the faces in the small crowd.  Her eyes locked with his, causing several other of those gathered to snap their heads toward him as well. Despite the sinking pit of dread that churned in his stomach and gnawed at his chest, he smiled at her.  It was slight, and all he could manage, but she smiled, too, closed her eyes, and drank.

For a brief, yet excruciating moment, nothing happened and the entire hall fell silent, watching and waiting.  Then, Liss tossed her head back and opened her eyes. She was quiet, but stumbling back and forth and clutching at her throat and chest as if she were fighting against an invisible animal that grappled at her neck.  As he watched, hot tears burned behind his eyes, and he could restrain himself no longer.

“Liss,” he shouted in complete disregard for Joining protocol as he rushed forward, sprinting across the room in just enough time to catch her.  He hooked his arms under her and lowered her to the ground gently, a stark and steady contrast to the violent quaking inside his chest as he cradled her head and upper body.  She was limp and lifeless, skin frighteningly cool to the touch.

“No,” Nathaniel rasped, raw with every emotion he’d ever felt for her.  The eyes of those who remained in the hall burned into his back, their still, solemn silence more unnerving than comforting.  They should be celebrating. Liss was supposed to survive, damn it. She was supposed to wake up no worse for wear and tease him for being so ridiculously worried, to prove him wrong like she always had.  This wasn’t right.

“No, no. Liss, wake up,” he muttered again, shaking her gently and panicking when she did not stir.  He gathered her up into his arms, as if he could hold her together, and pressed his face against her neck.  His hands twisted in her hair and clutched at the fabric of her shirt, fighting desperately with the sobs that threatened to overtake him. “Liss.  Stay with me, please.”

Everyone in the hall remained respectfully, and eerily, silent, as Nathaniel held Liss, rocking back and forth and humming, more to comfort himself than anything.  He cared little what the others thought of him, and cared little that he was entirely vulnerable and exposed. He could hardly bring himself to care for anything other than the woman in his arms, the one he loved.  A gentle pressure fell on his shoulder and he looked up to see Lucia, tears welling in her eyes as she shifted her gaze from Liss to him.

“I’m sorry, Nathaniel,” she said, words shaking as they fell from her mouth.  “I—“

She paused, narrowing her eyes and tilting her head to examine Liss more closely.  Just as she did so, Liss’s fingers twitched, and she coughed abruptly and forcefully, grimacing and blinking several times before her eyes slowly fluttered open.  She smiled, and it was the most beautiful thing he could possibly imagine. She was alive, thank the Maker. She was alive.  

“Nate,” she said hoarsely, bringing a hand up to his cheek, thumb wiping away one of the many tears he’d shed. Her smile widened briefly and then she lost consciousness again.

Nathaniel’s heart sank into his abdomen and he frantically pressed two fingers to her neck, sighing when he felt a pulse.  It was weak, but there. He snapped his head back to Lucia, and nodded.

“Anders,” Lucia shouted, and the mage flinched. He rushed over and knelt on the ground beside Nathaniel to examine Liss.  

Closing his eyes, he extended a hand, palm down, and held it over Liss for a moment, typically mischievous eyes filled with nothing but compassion as he looked first at Nathaniel, then Lucia.  “She did not take well to the taint.”

“Does anyone,” Lucia asked dryly.

“No, but this is the worst reaction I’ve seen anyone survive.”  His eyes were trained on Liss as he spoke. “She is lucky to be alive.”

“Is she going to be all right?”  Under different circumstances, Nathaniel would be ashamed by his lack of composure.

“She’ll be fine.  She just needs to rest,” Anders explained, and then laughed, “I’m more worried about you.”

Nathaniel didn’t acknowledge his remark, too preoccupied with Liss to care.  He brushed a strand of hair from her face, relieved that she was warm and breathing again. He was shaky, out of breath, and his head pounded.  It would take more than a matter of minutes to recover from the devastation that reaked havoc on his body.

“We should, uh, probably get her to a bed,” Alistair suggested, walking up to stand beside Lucia, “Don’t you think?”

“Right.” Nathaniel frowned, but nodded in agreement, moving to stand, picking Liss up as he did so. He turned to look at Anders, then Velanna.  “I may need some help.”

Anders nodded and Velanna stepped forward from where she’d been standing near Sigrun.  For the first time, Nathaniel noticed that all of his friends had remained, even Oghren who pretended not to be watching intently, even though he was.  Looking down at Liss once more, to make certain she was still all right, he took a breath and made his way to the back of the hall, and the stairway that led up to the living quarters.  Velanna and Anders followed behind him.

When they reached Liss’ room, Nathaniel eased her down onto the bed, not taking time to bother with the blankets, as she had broken out into a sweat that he made every effort not to worry too much about.  He then turned to look at the others helplessly. “What does she need?”

Stepping forward, Anders placed the back of his hand against her forehead.  “She has a fever, but that normal.”

“You said she was not reacting well to the taint.  Why? What does that mean?”

“I am a healer, Nate, not an expert on Blight magic.”  Anders’ words were sarcastic, but not unkind.  

Velanna approached the bed to examine Liss, pressing a hand to her forehead, then cheek.  “Sometimes when my clan would wander too near blighted lands, the halla would become sick.  Feverish, lethargic. It was in response to exposure to Darkspawn blood.”

“But that’s Blight sickness,” Anders protested, “Grey Wardens are supposed to be immune.”

“Grey Wardens are more resistant,” she explained, “It will not kill her, but she can still suffer the symptoms.”

Nathaniel directed his attention to Velanna, and asked, “Will it go away on its own?”

“I am unsure about how the disease works in a Grey Warden.  The halla never recovered on their own.”

“But they survived?” Anders frowned.

“There is a flower,” she said with a sigh, “Your people call it Andraste’s Grace.  When ground and mixed with elfroot, it cured our animals.”

“But the Blight sickness is incurable,” Anders remarked.

“In people. The flower was never able to help our hunters who fell ill.” She paused for a beat and brought her eyes to meet Nathaniel’s, “But it might work for her, considering her newly acquired Blight resistance.”

“Do you have what you need,” Nathaniel asked.

“Yes, I believe so.” She nodded decisively.  “I will go prepare a potion.”

“Thank you, Velanna,” he stated, hoping she could hear the gratitude in his voice.  She smiled, giving him a gentle squeeze on the arm as she walked past him and exited the room.   He sat down on the foot of the bed near Liss, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees, head dropping into his hands.

“So, how long have you been in love with her,” Anders asked as casually as if he were speaking about the weather.

“Anders,”  Nathaniel stated tersely, hoping the mage would sense his tone and desist.

“I know, I know.  You don’t want to talk about it.”  Anders waved his hands emphatically.  “Fine. At least go outside and get some air. “

“Are you sure?”

“Nate, she’s going to be fine,” Anders stated more sternly than Nathaniel was accustomed to hearing him speak, “I’ll stay here with her, and if you don’t trust me, then Velanna will be back any minute.”

“Why wouldn’t I trust you?”

“Why would you?  Nobody else does.”  Anders’ words had sharp edges that were not quite dulled by his shrugging and laughing afterward.

“I have no doubt that you will take better care of her than I could.”   Nathaniel smiled and stood up. “ And I do need to clear my head.”

“You’re not worried I’ll summon a demon to feast on her, or work some evil blood magic?”  He laughed again, but seemed relieved.

“No, Anders.  I’m not.” Nathaniel said, directly, clapping him on the shoulder before heading toward the door, “I trust you.”

Nathaniel left the room, hoping— no, praying— that Velanna’s potion worked, and that Liss would be awake and well when he returned.  Then again, the thought of facing her after their argument, after she nearly died. What would he say? Would she even want to see him?  The thought that their friendship might be ruined for good, was only slightly less horrifying than her death.  

He made his way downstairs, through the main hall that was now completely empty, and out to the courtyard.  It was early evening, the rays of light just starting to dim, blocked out by heavy clouds that still hung in the sky.  He had intended to make his way to the archery range. Shooting had always given him a sense of calm and clarity, and he hoped that it would help him to wrap his mind around the events of the past several hours.  However, it was already too dark, and with the foreboding of a storm, it was not even worth the effort to light the torches.

Instead, he sat down gracelessly on the steps, and stared out over the exterior of the keep.  In so many ways he felt as if he were fifteen again, back at his family home, sitting outside in less than ideal weather to escape the suffocating presence of everything inside, emotions in turmoil over Liss. The only major difference, aside from his father no longer causing him misery, was that he faced nothing alone.  There were people who cared about him, and he took more than a little solace in that.

There was a gravelly chuckle behind him and he flinched, turning around just in time to see Oghren close the door and approach him.  “The stairs aren’t for sitting, Howe.”

“I beg to differ,” Nathaniel answered with a laugh.  

Oghren moved to sit beside him, as if he had not just lectured him on the purpose of stairs.  “I figured you might be out at the range.”

“It’s too dark,” Nathaniel explained, and then narrowed his eyes at the dwarf, “Were you looking for me?”

“Suppose I was,” Oghren sighed, “Thought I would see how you’re holding up.  I didn’t think that Cousland girl was going to make it.”

“And you were worried about me? I am flattered, Ser Dwarf.”

“Yeah well…”  Oghren trailed off and looked away, as if he were embarrassed.  He fell silent for a moment and then continued. “You know, usually I’d make a joke about how she’s too pretty for ya.  How Ol’ Oghren could treat her much better.”

“And this is supposed to be comforting,” Nathaniel asked dryly, one eyebrow quirking up.  

“It is if you let me finish, boy.”

“I’m all ears.”  

“Truth is,” Oghren began solemnly, eyes focused out in the distance, “You’re one of the finest people I’ve had the pleasure of knowing, and she’d be lucky to have you.”

“I appreciate the sentiment,” Nathaniel replied, “But it’s complicated.”

“Complicated? You don’t even know the meaning of that word,” Oghren snapped, turning his head toward Nathaniel, “The first woman I ever loved ran off to the Deep Roads without me, and all I did was make a drunk of myself.  Now, I keep running away from anything that’s even close to being that vulnerable again.”

“Felsi and the baby,” Nathaniel stated timidly, feeling rather chastised.

“Right..” Oghren deflated and shook his head.  “I joined the Wardens because I thought Felsi’d leave me, stop letting me ruin her life.  Turns out love doesn’t work like that.”

Nathaniel searched for an appropriate response, but could find nothing, and chose to sit in the silence instead.  It did not last long, as Oghren inhaled and continued. “Listen. All I’m saying is that you can keep hating yourself for the past, run away from it, drown it in ale, bury it deep down, but it’s never going to go away.”

“Then what would you suggest, Oghren?” Nathaniel’s words were sharper than he intended.

“I don’t know,” Oghren answered, throwing up his hands, “ Maybe look at what you’ve got right now, right in front of you, and thank the shit out of whatever you worship that you have it”

“I have messed this up so many times, I’m not even certain it is an option to forget the past and move forward.”

“By the Stone, Howe!  Even I’m not that thick.”  He laughed, but was obviously frustrated.  “It’s clear you two are meant to be together.  Life’s too short to love someone like that and not do everything you can to make it work.”

“I…” Nathaniel frowned, unsure how exactly to take the dwarf’s tough love approach, “Thank you.”

“Here.” Reaching into his coat, Oghren pulled out a small silver flask and held it up.  Without even taking a swig, he slapped it against Nathaniel’s chest with enough force that Nathaniel flinched and caught it before it fell to his lap. “Now drink… and do whatever you’ve got to so you’re there for that girl when she wakes up.”

Before Nathaniel could even thank him again, Oghren stood up, grunting with the effort, and stomped back inside, leaving Nathaniel alone once again.  He stared down at the flask, which was adorned with dwarven letters and full to the brim. It was so unlike Oghren to share his spirits with anyone, let alone give someone an entire flask.  Had he stopped drinking? Or was he actually that sentimental? Perhaps it was both.  

In any case, it was thoughtful, just as his words had been.  Oghren was not the most articulate of people, but his words were more powerful than he likely realized.  Nathaniel had been so fixated on making up for his past mistakes, that he’d completely overlooked what he had in front of him.  Liss was angry, she’d refused to entertain his confession, but she’d never once given him any indication that she wished him gone.  When he truly thought about the events of the past few days, there was so much evidence to the contrary. She had been fighting for him the entire time, and he’d let his concern for her and the Joining cloud it all.  

He was such a bloody fool.

The clouds finally burst open and rain poured down torrentially, as if some dam had ruptured in the sky.  Fitting, Nathaniel thought. Twisting the cap off of Oghren’s flask, he took a long swig, eyes watering as the liquid burned it’s way down his throat.  Fergus had introduced him to dwarven ale many years ago, claiming that it would put hair on his chest. It left his mouth numb for hours, and he’d not touched it since, preferring drinks that didn’t taste like dirt and piss. He coughed, sniffed the ale, winced, and took another drink anyway.  It didn’t taste any better the second time.

He sat for a few moments longer, blinking away the rain that splashed against his face.  He shook his head and screwed the cap back on to the flask, placing it in his coat pocket before rising to his feet.  It was still too cold to mope about in the rain, and he’d chosen to heed Oghren’s advice anyway. Liss would no doubt wake up soon, and he was going to make sure he was there.

[luv-surveys]

44

Do you wear a ring on your finger? no. Do you expect to be married in the next two years? no way. What is your favorite type of cookie? chocolate chip. Are you allergic to pollen? yes, my allergies have gotten worse over the past couple years unfortunately :( Do you have more upper or lower body strength? more lower. Do you like hot tubs? yes they’re fun! Do you know anyone who is battling cancer? not to my knowledge. Have you ever donated money to a charity? yes. What was the last movie you’ve seen in theaters? i believe it was the live action aladdin. Do you prefer Apple or Android? apple. Do you like the color lime green? yes, but not neon lime green. Do you like the Silent Hill movies? i’ve never seen them. What movie scared you the most out of any other movies? probably “house on haunted hill” or something like that. Tell me something you’ve been made fun of for in the past. i’ve been made fun of for my height. Do you support war? it depends. Have you ever wanted to be on American Idol? When was this? no. Do you like kissing lightly better than just making out? nah, i prefer making out. You get a text from someone saying that they want to hang out - who would you most like it to be from? it’d probably be my friend kylie. Do you attend school, college, or university? i attend college/university. Name 5 things you don’t believe in. 1) love at first sight, 2) soulmates, 3) polytheism, 4) reincarnation, 5) the existence of bigfoot. If you could have any friend that you’ve lost back, who would you pick? probably my friend eva. When was the last time you did something for the first time? i listened to a song for the first time about 30 minutes ago. Do you have blinds in your bedroom? not my bedroom at home, no. When was the last time you had an interview? How did it go? march, for a job. it went well, but covid happened and everything got messed up. What was the most damaging relationship (romantic or not) that you’ve ever been a part of? probably my friendship with a girl that bullied me in high school. Who was the last person you cut out of your life? Do you regret it? i cut my ex out, and i don’t regret it because he treats me poorly. Who is the most attractive person you know personally? personally, i think a girl i know from high school is the prettiest person i know. Do you remember the first time you truly enjoyed sex? Or have you always? i’ve never had sex LOL. Have you ever done anything sexual in a car? yes if making out counts. What do you wish you had been better prepared for? my college auditions. Do you know anyone with a semicolon tattoo? nope. Who knows you best, excluding romantic partners? my parents. The last news you got that shocked you, what was it, and was it good news or bad news? probably that somebody was in a relationship with somebody, which is good news ig. If you have pets, who normally puts food and water in their dish? my mom does unless she’s away; then i do. Do you organize the pictures on your computer into different folders or are they all just under “My Pictures”? they’re all unorganized. Do you think if someone is in a relationship, that it is acceptable to have sleepovers with other people of their preferred sex? yes, but as long as there are no feelings whatsoever. Would you shoot a gun if given the chance? If you’ve shot a gun before, how many different types of guns have you shot? i would NOT shoot a gun lol. Do you feel uncomfortable sharing things like artwork or poetry you’ve written? Is it because you don’t think it’s good enough to show off or because it’s too personal? yes, i don’t like showing it off because it’s probably not good enough. For those who have anxiety, has anyone ever told you that you just need to calm down and actually face your fears? Were you insulted or frustrated by this comment? yes and it was both insulting and frustrating. Do you have any siblings you absolutely despise? Why do you despise them? no, i love my siblings! Do knives scare you? Is it from watching scary movies? they make me unsettled, but not from scary movies, just anxiety. Say lyrics from the song currently playing? “no time to regret this, what we’ve done” If you HAD to get a piercing (not ears) what would you get? i’d probably get a nose piercing. How many closets does your house have?
 there’s seven closets, i think. What has been your most epic cooking failure?
 i made cookies and they didn’t work and melted all over the pan and oven lol. What was the last single item you spent over $100 on?
 i don’t think i’ve ever spent over $100 on a single item. Have you ever climbed a chain-link fence? no. What is your LEAST favorite Disney animated movie? i don’t like the older ones, like pinocchio. Who was the last person’s house you went to besides your own? the guy i’m seeing’s house. Do you enjoy the birds’ singing in the morning? yes it’s lovely! List these apple types from greatest to least greatest: red, yellow, green. I’d say red, green, yellow. On YouTube, who are two people you find hilarious? i love jennxpenn’s videos, as well as pewdiepie. If you had to live in a palace, what would be the color scheme? probably red and gold. Favorite dinosaur? i love pterodactyls! What is the best part of fall? the tastes and smells. Favorite style of hat? probably just baseball caps. How do you eat Oreos? i used to split them and eat them separately but now i eat them whole. Name the first vine that you can think of. i coulda dropped my croissant! Beyonce vs Rihanna? i prefer rihanna. What’s fake about you? Like extensions, fake nails, botox etc. nothing, tbh! Have you ever gotten into a Facebook fight? never. What are your favorite smells? i love smells like lemon and grapefruit. Do you shave your pits? yes. Do you know anyone who has been on life support, and survived? no. What light in your house was the last to have a bulb burn out? i’m not sure since i’m not home rn. Have you ever been in an abandoned house? no. What is your favorite phase of the moon? full! What season do you want to get married in? probably spring. Besides the USA, what is your favorite country? i’ve always liked japan! Would you rather go to Europe or Asia? europe. Would you rather go to Africa or Australia? africa. Would you rather go to Mexico or Canada? canada. Are there such things as stupid questions? yes. Did you get in trouble for cussing on accident when you were a kid? yes, but my parents didn’t hear, only my sister. What’s the highest you can count in a different language? like 100 in french. Where would you like to be buried? just a local cemetery near where i grew up :) Have you ever had yourself drawn in caricature? nope. Have you ever seen a ghost orb picture? yes! Do you think abortion should be illegal? no. How many keys are on your key-ring? two. What are some piercings you want? more ear piercings, but that’s it. Dogs or cats? Why? dogs, because they’re more loving and fun. Do any of your pets have strange habits? Explain? my dog likes to eat napkins. Have you ever told an extremely inappropriate joke? dark humor, yes. What is your favorite non-traditional fruit? i like passionfruit! What’s your favorite older film? i don’t watch a lot of older films!  Aliens or unicorns? unicorns. Where did you meet your current or last significant other? instagram. Would you ever get a face tattoo? no way. If you asked your mom to describe you, what do you think she’d say? she’d probably say i’m smart, caring, and hardworking. What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world? more love and understanding! What are you most grateful for? how good of a childhood i had. Who is the most interesting person you’ve ever met? i’ve met some people with great stories from their lives. When do you love yourself most? when i do something well haha. What would you most readily die for? my parents. What single word do you hate most? probably slurs like the n word. Who in life have you felt the strongest need to protect? whomever i’m dating at the time. What would you most like to be remembered for after you die? my friendship. What’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had in bed? in bed? or in bed? if we’re just talking about in bed, waking up with my retainer under the sheets at the foot of my bed when it had been in my mouth when i fell asleep. What is the most sacred thing in your life? my religion. Who have you most feared in your life? probably my bullies. What was the quickest friendship you ever made? i’d say my roommate. What single word would you use to most accurately describe your parents? wise. What is the worst word anyone ever used to describe you? probably immature LMAO.

[hirunoka]

Sorry for the long wait, dear @3tothe1​. And I'm also sorry that it's pretty dialogue-heavy, and also short >< But I didn't want to keep you waiting any longer. I hope you have fun reading this chapter anyway. 💜 

Gold Love by Moreid

CHAPTER 2

"That shouldn't be this hard! He said I could tell him if I needed any help, and I need that toolbox." Kayla reminded herself for the third time.

Everything was almost done in his new home beside the TV unit she needed to assemble.

She has been standing in front of Aaron's door for more than two minutes, one hand is ready to knock, while the other is holding a plate full of cookies.

Finally, she knocked on the door and not even after a minute it was opened.

“Hi, I brought cookies.”

“Heey, neighbor." Aaron beamed at her, trying to fix his hair a little. It looked all messy and soft to touch.  "Do they contain any peanuts?" The doctor asked, looking at the plate. ‘Cause if they do, and I had some, I could realistically die.”

A moment of silence.

“...then you probably shouldn’t touch the ones on the right side, unless you crave death,” Kayla replied, handing over the plate.

“After my fiasco in that morning, I should probably start with the right side,” Aaron joked. “But in my defense, I wasn't fully awake yet. I know Spider-Man, especially fan of that super horrible dance Tobey does. Iconic. I was just lost for a second, I guess."

"Oh, hell no. Don't even go there." She laughed. Six days have passed since they met, and whenever they would come across each other, it would never be just greetings and 'have a good day' with them. Somehow they always found themselves laughing at something together. "And don't worry, it's not a big deal."

"Isn't it really, though? Because I'm pretty sure that your face said the exact opposite." He then pointed the cookies on the left side on the plate. "I assume these are the sweet, non-life-threatening peanut-free chocolate cookies?”

"Okay, okay, you got me." Kayla raised her hands in surrender with a grin. "What can I say? I love Spider-Man. And yeah, safe to eat."

“They look delicious, thanks. I thought I was supposed to bring you something? All the traditional rules say so. “

“Rules are meant to be broken,” Kayla shrugged, “fuck ‘em.”

"A rebel! Nice. Unless you rob banks in your spare time. You need any help with anything? I can grab my panda mask to join you in your illegal adventure real quick.”

"Didn't know you were this willing to root in jails."

"For real, though, you need any help with anything?"

"Actually, yes. Do you happen to have a toolbox? I have this large  TV unit I need to assemble.”

“I can help you to assemble it if you want."

"Well, that would be good, but you really don't have to. I'd hate to bother you."

"Bother me? Never. I'm bored anyway, might as well put my hands to good use."

"If you insist."

"Let me grab my toolbox then."

"Don't forget to take your panda mask with you!" the photographer teased as Aaron disappeared down the hallway.

"I only use it for birthday parties and robbing banks with friends! No can do!" came Aaron's reply.

"Ah, too bad! I was kinda excited to see you in your panda mask. They are my favorite animals."

"I love them, too!"

***

"I must say, your place is really nice," looking around, Aaron said after they stepped into the living room. He whistled when his eyes caught the figure collections Kayla had, looking pretty impressed. The doctor then pointed at the figures: "May I?" he asked enthusiastically, to which she nodded.

"Feel free."

Seeing him walking towards her showcases reminded her of a kid in a candy store.

It was cute.

His big, blue eyes sparkled when he realized her Back to the Future figures were standing just like in that iconic movie poster; Marty is wrapped in his classic orange vest and sunglasses, checking his watch while Doc standing behind him.

"Wow, you have a Marty McFly figure?! That's rad. And not just him, but like, you have everything."

"You love Back to the Future, I see." Kayla smiled, leaning against the wall as he looked at the figures in admiration.

"Who doesn't? I love Star Wars as well, an excellent collection you got here. If one day you wake up to an empty showcase, it's not gonna be me. Just saying."

She shook her head with a laugh, "Now I’m happy that I don’t have a MJ figure yet, I would hate to see it gone. And thanks, I'll keep that in mind. Your place will be the first one I'll check if I ever wake up and find my collection long gone."

Aaron frowned at that a bit, "I just told you not to do that, you got it all wrong. I've always wanted a Delorean, by the way. I mean, not any Delorean, but," he pointed at the Delorean figure with his head, "a time machine. Then I could go back in time, and... nevermind."

"Girlfriend drama?"

"Oh, no. Not something as serious as that."

'He sounds like a kind of man who takes love seriously,' was Kayla's first thought when he said that. And her second thought was: 'I hope it's not girlfriend drama. God, please don't let it be girlfriend drama.'

"And I don't have one. A girlfriend, I mean."

YES.

Thank God.

"Well, that makes two of us." Kayla shrugged, "I don't have a girlfriend either. "

"Good to know." Aaron smiled at her, "How about a boyfriend?"

"Why? Are you offering?" She joked.

"With a collection like this? Hell, you can even expect a marriage proposal from me," he chuckled. "You didn't answer my question, though."

Not expecting a joke like this, Kayla laughed. "Wait until you see my DVD and record collection then. Eh, I had, now I don't."

"...you have a record collection?"

"Please don't look at me like that, it's old-school, I know, but I really love the-"

"No, no, no, I'm not judging you. I have a record collection, too. My friends love teasing me because of it. 'We're living in the twenty-first century, man! You are wasting your money for nothing, just download the damn song!' " He shook his head with a roll of his eyes, "They don't get it."

"Lucky for you, your neighbor does. That's mean of them. They shouldn't make fun of something you like."

"They mean no harm, but you're right. Do I make fun of Ryan's banana sticker collection, or Emeline stuffed cows collection that she has been collecting over seven years? Or Scott's pizza box collection? No, I don't."

Was he even serious?

Okay, his expression was pretty serious.

'Don't laugh, don't laugh, don't laugh,' Kayla warned herself, just after saying people shouldn't make fun of each other, she couldn't laugh at that.

But after a while, Aaron was the one who let out a laugh, not looking serious any longer.

"Oh God, you should've seen your face."

"Wait, did you just- That was mean! Do they even exist? Emily and Scott?"

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself. Well, yeah. They do exist. Somewhere. That '15 Things You Won't Believe People Collect' article I've read says so, at least."

"I can't believe I fell for it."

"Anyway, let's get to work, and I can tell you about the rest meanwhile."

"I'm not sure if I wanna hear it."

Aaron shot him a look saying 'Are you sure?'

"...okay, I kinda wonder," she admitted, "shoot."

***

"Dwight is my favorite after Jim," Aaron said.

After finishing assembling the TV Unit, they had found themselves watching The Office somehow.  Probably because it was on TV, and because apparently, Aaron loved it, too. "I can't believe you have seen the show for more than six times."

What happened next was one of the weirdest things ever happened. Because her cat Milo walked into the room and didn't even run away when he saw Aaron. What he did instead was going next to Aaron and playfully nuzzling him with his head.

"Hi there, beautiful." the doctor smiled lovingly and picked up the cat and placed him in his lap, petting it carefully and slowly so as not to agitate it. His movements were slow and gentle.

"Look what you got here! What's your name, little buddy? Where have you been hiding all this time?" He petted his head and under his chin, and then slowly got the rhythm of it as he scratched behind his ear, making the cat purr. Aaron couldn't help but giggle at the cute behavior.

"I hope you don't really expect an answer from him."

"It would be so awesome if he could answer, but since he won't do that anytime soon, what's his name?"

"Milo."

"A cute name for a cute- wait, why are you looking at me like this?"

"If you were me, you would look at me like that, too. Believe me."

"Why is that?"

"Normally he doesn't even go near to anyone but me, let alone letting them pet him in their lap."

"Aww, I must be special then."

'Maybe you are,' Kayla thought. It wasn't long until Milo was asleep.

"Oh, I didn't realize how late it was. I should probably go now, but you will have to take Milo from me yourself because I don't have the heart to disturb him. I just can't. Look at him! How can I?"

"How about we don't disturb him for twenty-two minutes and watch one more episode?" She offered, "Stress Relief is the next after this. It’s my favorite episode."

"Wow. You really do know the name of every episode. Impressing. Mine is Dinner Party."

“Good one. So? What do you say?”

“I say, you’re right.” Aaron nodded, smiling down at the sleeping cat. “Let’s not disturb him.”

[obsidiancreates]

Reading Buddies

Jameson set his book down and sighed. He hated being home alone, and he hated being home alone while it was silent even more. Chase had gone out to talk to the electric company about getting their power back on, and until then Jameson's only background noise was normally unnoticeable creaking of the house.

His clip-on reading light flickered. "Oh, please no," he muttered. The reading light flickered again, and died.

When they had power, the house was very well lit. Without it, shadows ruled. He could barely see his book anymore. He huffed, clenched his jaw, and got up.

He checked the junk drawer, as Chase called it, where the batteries were usually kept. Nothing. At least, nothing but a note. The note simply read, "Out of batteries. Sorry."

"Oh... humbug." He pushed the drawer closed with a tad bit more force than necessary. 'Maybe Jackie has some in his room.'

He opened the door. The only light in the room came from a single window just opposite the door. It was a big window, granted, but not nearly big enough to make the room any more than dim. In the corner, on a dark blue doggy bed, Roast was snoozing and make little noises in his sleep.

Jameson was careful not to wake the little puppy as he searched. He opened one drawer, and then another, and another, and kept going until he had opened every drawer and looked under every sheet of paper or discarded item of clothing. Nothing.

He put his hands on his hips and frowned. He wiggled his mustache thoughtfully. Who else would have batteries?

He heard a small whine, and turned around to find that Roast was waking up. The puppy yawned, looked at Jameson, and started wagging his tail. Roast jumped out of his bed and ran over. He jumped up, putting hi front paws on Jameson’s leg.

“Well, good afternoon! Did you have a good nap?”

Roast couldn’t read the speech slide, of course, but he yapped happily anyway. Jameson suspected it was similar to how the others knew what tone he was using despite not being able to hear it. His own personal kind of magic. He knelt down and scratched behind Roast’s little floppy ears. “Do you happen to know where I might find some batteries?”

Roast liked his hand. “Hmm, I thought not. Let’s go searching together, shall we?”

Roast followed him out of the room and over to Chase’s. None, shockingly. Nor were there any in Schneep’s room. Jameson went to check Marvin’s.

Snappers looked up as soon as the door opened. She stared at Jameson from her little tower in the corner of the room. Jameson went through the drawers, the little dragon’s watchful eye on him the whole time. Well, most of the time. Eventually she noticed Roast and flew down to greet her furry friend.

Jameson gave up his search. He threw his hands in the air and plopped down in Marvin’s desk chair. He watched Snappers and Roast wrestle for a bit. Snappers flew up just enough that Roast couldn’t reach her. The puppy jumped up over and over, growing more and more excited with each leap, yapping non-stop. Snappers looked as amused as could be. She let her tail down, then brought it back up just before Roast’s jaws could close around it.

It would have been fine even if he did bite her. Puppy teeth could hardly do anything to dragon scales. 

“Well, where haven’t I looked yet?” Jameson asked. Snappers turned her head towards him. Roast caught hold of her tail and there he stayed, dangling just above the ground, looking very proud of himself.

“Hmm... do you think the lab might have any?”

Snappers blinked at him and gave a small roar. 

“I’ll take that as a yes. Must be worth a shot, really!”

He got up. Snappers lowered Roast back down to the ground, and after shaking her tail a bit, convinced him to release her. She flew up to Jameson’s shoulder and sat down. 

“Ah, a new companion for our adventure!“ Jameson smiled as Snappers rubbed her face against his cheek. He and his two little friends set off for the lab.

The lab had a backup generator, of course. Marvin had enchanted it so that it always functioned, no matter what. Only something truly extreme could take it out, and while bills could be stressful, a late payment didn’t count.

Azure was running on her wheel in her habitat. Schneep refused to call it a cage, shivered when the word was brought up and got a haunted look in his eye, and that was all it took for his brother’s to resolve to never refer to it as a cage either. Besides, it was too nice for that word. It was more like a mouse palace.

“Hello there Azure. Do you know where our dear doctor might keep the batteries?”

Azure kept running.

“I see, busy with your exercise! I shan’t interrupt.” He looked around. Nothing. Then he smacked his forehead with his palm. “Oh, dear me! Here I am, looking for a way to power my small light, when the room has light of it’s own! I do believe that scatterbrain runs in the family, or perhaps Chase has been rubbing off on me more than I realized.” He laughed to himself and shook his head.

“Let’s see... how do I do this again?” he mused out loud. He hadn’t used his... “summoning” ability since the day of his birth. He sat at Schneep’s desk and imagined a hand, holding his book. 

It took a minute of concentration, but a hand rose up from beside him and gave him his book. He waved at it as it sank, vanishing. Roast barked at where it had been, sniffing the ground with all the intensity his tiny form could muster. Snappers just tilted her head. She’s seen things far more odd than that.

Azure got off her wheel and scurried to the wall of her habitat closest to Jameson. Snappers flew over and lowered her tail into it. She wrapped it around Azure and lifted the mouse out, gently placing her on the desk top. Then she lifted Roast up, earning a surprised yelp, and placed him in Jameson’s lap.

She settled back on Jameson’s shoulder and pointed at the book with her head.

“Do you want me to read it too you?” Jameson asked. Snappers made a purring noise. “Well, if you insist. Let’s see, where was I? Ah, yes. The Death of Rats rounded up the last of his clients, many of whom had been in the thatch, and lead the way through the flames toward wherever it was that good rats went. He was surprised...”

The animals all payed close attention. Perhaps they couldn’t read the slides, but they could sense the way this made Jameson happy, and they were more than glad to contribute to that.

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(The book Jameson is reading is Reaper Man by Terry Pratchett!)

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