#yes decisions caused in part by their development problems but they also responded to said problems poorly

[uinferno]

To be a Hater, you must go at it alone. You must be known as "the guy who hates XYZ" in your friend group. If everyone in that group falls under that umbrella, then you've got yourself a crab bucket. Not even in a "getting help" sense, you'll just feed off each other in an endless cycle wasting too much of your time until that's all you ever talk about.

If you've ever seen subreddits dedicated to venting/problems or being critical of something, you'll understand why. Normal people say their piece and move on. They won't stick around for long. However, in order for those subs to be maintained and its community to remain active, you need to have regulars keeping the ball rolling. When that happens day in and day out with no breaks, that's just a downwards spiral, mister.

Ranting to friends who don't actually give a shit is key. Their zen attitude grounds you back to reality, and your disdain for shit that doesn't matter is amusing from the sidelines. For me: One friend is "the one who hates Fourth Wing." Another is "the one who hates Danganronpa." I'm "the guy who hates Legend of Korra." We all have our own niche, and by maintaining a variety of haters who don't all agree, we cultivate a welcoming environment of complaining.

[whoree321]

Hey, I believe your requests are open, so, could you please write smth were reader and Tech are friends with benefits?

Also, I’m in the same dilemma as you, cause everyone already forgot tbb and I’m still obsessed??? Like, were is everybody excitement about the show, it was gone so fast…

Anyway, thank ya <3

hello friend! this is a delicious request and i am more than happy to oblige! i’m not sure if you wanted like pure angst or like sexy successful fwb but above all else i am a dirty dirty slut for happy endings so i went light angst, heavy fluff, mild smut to get a little of everything lmaooooo. this also got a little out of control and i’m not sorry.

and literally i am suffering so much in this ever increasing drought of bad batch excitement. like i feel like the person at a party when everyone else is tired and wants to leave who’s still just way too hyped and is like “NO WAIT GUYS LETS HAVE MORE SHOTS AND PLAY TRUTH OR DARE COME ON ITLL BE FUN”. i am in absolute agony. but anyways!

a mutually beneficial arrangement (tech x gn!reader)

it was purely sex. just two friends helping each other relieve some stress occasionally. just two friends who happened to have sex with each other. until it wasn’t.

warnings: fwb, mild smut, reader is gender/genital neutral but they are penetrated by tech (amab)

word count: no idea but it’s pretty long

***

In hindsight, it really shouldn’t have shocked you that this was how things played out.

It’s not like you’d ever been friends with benefits with someone before. It’s not like you didn’t know how easily you could develop feelings for people. It’s not like you didn’t know you were maybe just a little too interested in Tech non-platonically before any of this even started.

No, you knew all of those things going into it. You made the conscious decision to be the biggest dumbass in the galaxy.

When Tech had first suggested a friends with benefits situation, it seemed like a much better idea than it actually was. You had been assigned to Clone Force 99 for a few weeks at that point and had already developed fast friendships with all of them (Crosshair even sometimes acknowledged your presence with neutrality and that definitely felt like at least an acquaintanceship). You were closest with Tech, and one tipsy night at 79’s found the two of you making out in a hallway near the bathroom. You could still remember the way his mouth tasted like whiskey as he pressed you up against the wall

He paused his assault on your lips to look at you, breath fanning lightly across your face. You whined at the loss of contact, not noticing in your haze the intensity in his eyes as he studied you, as though if he took in enough of you he would have the answer to an imposssible question. He migrated lower, planting kisses and sucking lightly on your neck until he made his way to your ear.

“Have you ever heard of people being platonic sexual partners?”, he asked low in your ear. You shuddered at the feeling of his breath and the deeper tone to his voice before you answered.

“You mean like friends with benefits?”

“Yes, that is exactly what I mean,” Tech clarified as he moved to once again nibble on the sweet spots of your neck. Had you had a little more sense, you would have warned him not to leave any noticeable marks, lest you suffer the teasing of the rest of the boys.

“I’ve heard of it, I’ve never done it before though. Why?”

“Well, given our current circumstance,” his response was punctuated by his ministrations on your pressure points, “it may be mutually beneficial for us to enter into that type of arrangement.”

You stopped him for a moment, and lifted his face so that you could make eye contact. Tech stood up a little straighter, hands running up and down your sides lightly as he gazed down at you.

“You think that we should be friends with benefits?”

Tech nodded, one hand moving to brush a strand of hair out of your face.

“I believe it would be an advantageous relationship. We could have relations while still maintaining our successful platonicity, thus eliminating the need to alter the dynamic of the squad with the complications of some trivial romance. It would also be physically beneficial. Sexual intercourse has been shown to successfully alleviate stress, as well as…”

He kept going, explaining the health benefits of sex, but it was hard to pay attention to his rambling while you tried to clear your head of the alcohol and the intoxication of his touch and figure out where you stood on his proposition. In that moment, everything he said made total sense. Granted, that part about “trivial romance” stung a little, but you could still fuck him without ruining the squad or your friendship with him, and Maker did you want to fuck him…

Uncharacteristically cutting off his rant, you responded. “I accept your offer. I would love to be friends with benefits with you.”

Tech grinned, a lust forming in his eyes at the new promise of the benefits the night was leading to.

“Splendid”

From that (mind-blowing) night, sex became a very regular thing. A mission went poorly? Frustrated sex. A mission went well? Celebratory sex. The Batch got leave time? Vacation sex. The Batch hadn’t gotten leave time in too long? Cabin fever sex. It really had started out pretty platonically, but after the first few times you could feel yourself falling head over heels for him. You knew you should stop it, Tech would never hold it against you or be upset if you changed your mind. You told yourself again and again that you would just break it off with him, but then his hands and his lips and his body would be on you, and the hungry way he looked at you would knock the air, and any ideas of making him stop, out of you.

In your defense, it wasn’t like you were the one who had suggested it. Tech had to know the likelihood that your “platonic sexual relationship” would only stay platonic for so long. Actually, you were surprised he hadn’t done a little more analysis of the situation. If he had taken into account all of the factors (the rate of failure in friends with benefits situations, each of your levels of emotionality and past relationships, the effects of living and working in close quarters, etc), you can’t imagine he would have thought it was a smart idea. If Tech had crunched the numbers like he normally would, it wouldn’t have produced favorable results. So for him to want to do it anyway, or to not even analyze it beforehand, must mean he had some sort of feelings for you, right?

This was one of the various problem in your current situation. Tech would always do things that were just on the line between “friends” and “more than friends”. He would go out of his way to do little things for you, he would share info and jokes and side comments with you that he never tried to share with brothers, he would blush when you complimented any of his work, he would stand just a little too close to you or let his touch linger just a little too long. He would suggest a sexual relationship that was highly statistically improbable to be successful.

And while Tech offered nothing but mixed signals, you took it a step further and let those mixed signals fester in your brain until you had warped them into one very clear signal: he liked you as more than a friend. You were so sure of it too. Why would he do all of those things if he didn’t like you like that? It’s not even like he treated you like some one night stand when he fucked you. He cared about making you feel good (usually it seemed like he cared more about you getting off than him), he would clean you up after and you always stayed the night together, cuddled and whispering late into the night about nothing and everything.

There was nothing friendly about your intimate nights together, come to think of it. Friends that just fucked would never treat each other so tenderly or lovingly. It’s not that completely unbelievable to think you would accidentally blurt out that you love him. Tech should have expected that.

But it was out there, unfortunately. You had committed the cardinal sin of being friends with benefits and you couldn’t take it back.

Tech’s brutal pace never faltered as he pumped in and out of you, your moans growing louder and louder as you began to approach your peak. He gazed down at you, locking eyes, and the emotion you could feel behind them was overwhelming. You could tell that he was close, with all the experience you had with him you knew his body better than your own, and he brought his hand up to softly caress your cheek.

“You’re so beautiful. I can’t believe I get to see you like this,” he huffed out, brow furrowing as the rhythmic slamming of his hips against you brought him closer and closer to the edge.

At his words, you reached your climax, and as you came undone words of ecstasy slipped from your lips between wails of pleasure.

“Kriff Tech… ah…. Tech..fuck…I love you”

You didn’t even realize it at first, too caught up in the moment, but Tech did. His eyes grew impossibly wide, and he was finishing inside you before either of you could fully process what you had just said.

As you both came down from your high, the gravity of your admission settled between you. Tech pulled out and flopped down next to you wordlessly, and for a few minutes you both just stared at the ceiling in torturous silence. And then he got up and walked to the refresher, not even looking at you once, and you felt like that was all the confirmation you needed that you woefully misinterpreted your entire relationship with him.

You lept out of his bunk, threw your clothes on, and left as silently as possible, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill down your cheeks. At least you could spare yourself the embarrassment of your words in that moment, and both of you could just forget it and move on.

Of course, you knew that pretending it didn’t happen would be impossible. You told him you loved him, and he said nothing. For several minutes. And then hid in the fresher. That was a clear rejection, and while it devastated you, you were still hoping that the two of you could just move on and be friends like you were before the benefits were added.

Apparently to Tech, you had offended him beyond repair. He never spoke to you (unless it was specifically mission oriented), he rarely looked at you or acknowledged your presence, and he positioned himself as far from you as possible at every opportunity. It had been two weeks since your slip up, and he hadn’t even made eye contact with you once.

It was agony. You missed him. You didn’t even really know what it was like to be on this squad without keeping him company while he made repairs or asking him questions about the next place you were going just to hear him talk. You missed making snide jokes with him. You missed admiring the way his goggles magnified his gorgeous caramel eyes.

The other boys noticed the shift very quickly. They had suspected the two of you had some sort of arrangement, and they knew how close you were, so to see it change so abruptly was concerning. Hunter had tried talking to you about it a few times, but you just reassured him that everything was fine and it was nothing he needed to worry about. Wrecker and Crosshair tried to pick up the slack, and started filling in the holes in your routine that Tech used to occupy. Crosshair would sit next to you in the mornings and during briefings, sometimes trying to make little comments in your ear like Tech would. On missions, Wrecker would always aim to pair up with you, and afterwards would try to do something fun like find a sweet treat or rent a good movie.

You appreciated so much what they did for you. But no matter how hard they tried, nothing could take your mind off the wall of ice Tech had built between you. You loved the other boys, but trying to share happy moments with them when all you could think about was how much better it would be with him was becoming unbearable. You didn’t want to leave them, but you couldn’t stay with Tech being so close to you and yet lightyears away.

As you filled out your transfer paperwork, you chuckled wryly to yourself. Even without the “trivial romance”, the squad was still disrupted. In a bittersweet way, it felt good for Tech to be wrong.

***

Tech had really done his best to analyze the evidence and make an informed decision based on his findings. He had been crunching his numbers with you since the day you joined the Batch, after all. Back then, it was the probability of your attraction to each of them. Tech was fascinated with you, and right off the bat he wanted to know his odds- just out of curiosity of course (for the record, they were pretty highly in his favor).

He knew there were pros and cons to the possibility of a relationship with you. First of all, it was technically against regulation for any clone to be involved in a romantic relationship. Second of all, it was likely that such a relationship would have the potential to cause countless rifts and points of weakness among his squad (regardless of the relationship’s success). Then there was also the very possible chance that the relationship wouldn’t work out anyway, leaving both of you hurt and irreparably damaging your friendship. As much as Tech may have wanted you, the costs unfortunately outweighed the benefits.

But then he kissed you at 79’s. And you kissed him back. And there he was, kissing you at 79’s, memorizing the sweetness of your lips on his. And he knew he should stop. He had studied the data and it’s conclusions were not very good, and if he had any sense at all he would stop. But he pulled away and looked at you, took in the flush on your cheeks and the dazed look accompanying your dilated pupils and the swell of your bruised lips. And he couldn’t bring himself to part ways with you. So he offered the closest thing to a relationship he could think of: friends with benefits.

A friends with benefits arrangement would be a more than adequate solution, Tech had decided. He could be physical with you in the proper moments, and then outside of those moments everything would be just as it was before. The squad’s dynamic and mission proficiency would remain consistent, and technically no regulations were being broken since they only specified romantic relationships. Of course, it wasn’t truly what he wanted, but in this arrangement he would get to enjoy you so much more than he currently was.

Unfortunately, he had made a critical oversight. In the dim haze of the club hallway, Tech had only considered how casual sex would compare to a full blown relationship. He didn’t think to analyze it singularly. And he certainly didn’t calculate the logistics of a friends with benefits agreement when one of the friends in question already had romantic feelings for the other friend.

But Tech knew himself. He knew he could have feelings for you and not let them get in the way. He could accept what he was able to have and make peace with what he couldn’t. Casual sex seemed like a good idea when his emotions were the only ones he took into account.

He wasn’t expecting you to fall in love with him.

When you had said it, Tech thought his heart was going to stop right then and there. In the heat of the moment, he couldn’t have imagined more precious words falling from your lips, and instantly it had him spiraling over the edge into ecstasy. But then the moment ended, and you didn’t say anything. He wanted to end the silence, to find out if you really meant it, but his brain was moving too fast to figure out what to say because he really hadn’t considered this would happen. It was naive of him, he supposed, but he really had thought the two of you could have done it without the emotional complications. Part of him, of course, was thrilled, but the other part of him, the logical part, was thrown into absolute chaos at the implications of your statement and what it would mean and all the statistics and probabilities he had calculated and

And you still hadn’t said anything. Tech could see you out of the corner of his eye, face red and chest heaving with emotion. You looked embarassed, regretful, and the realization that maybe you didn’t mean it hit him like a brick to the face. Maybe it was just something that slipped out, something your orgasm-addled mind had conjured up against your will and now you didn’t know how to take it back, didn’t know the right way to tell him you don’t actually love him.

It was too much for him to process at once, and he ran to the refresher in the hopes that he could clear his head and actually think coherently about the situation for a moment. Tech couldn’t have been in there long, maybe a few minutes, just long enough to splash some water on his face, look himself in the eye, and come to the conclusion that he needed to just have a conversation with you instead of playing with hypothetical numbers in his head. But then he came back out and you were gone, and that seemed like all the answer he needed. You didn’t mean it.

That was good, right? You didn’t mean it, and the two of you could keep going the way you had been.

But the ache in Tech’s heart said otherwise. You didn’t love him. He loved you, he knew he did, and he could be ok with pretending he didn’t when he didn’t know how you felt. But he knew now. And it hurt.

It hurt everytime he talked to you, so he stopped talking to you. It hurt everytime he was near you, so he stopped being near you. It hurt everytime he looked at you, so he stopped looking. The squad’s performance hadn’t been altered, so Tech concluded that the awkwardness could be tolerated until your presence didn’t feel so much like a blaster shot to his chest.

But just like pretty much every other choice Tech had made in regards to you, that plan only worked until it backfired horrifically.

***

The Batch were back on Kamino in between missions. Tech had been vaguely aware of Hunter being called in to a meeting of some sort, but he offered his full attention as Hunter stormed back into their room and huffed his way to Tech’s workbench.

“I don’t know what you did, but you need to fix things with Y/N. Now”

At the mention of your name, Tech pretended to return to his work, fiddling with a tool and avoiding eye contact.

“I do not know what you are referring-“

“Like hell you don’t Tech! The two of you haven’t even looked at each other in weeks and now they’ve put in a request to be transferred to another unit, so don’t tell me there’s nothing going on between you.”

Tech shot up, tools abandoned and stool knocked over with the force of his standing.

“They requested a transfer?”

“Yeah, they did. Now, I don’t know what happened, but I know your little silent treatment has been hurting them a lot. I don’t want to see them go, and you don’t either. So go talk to them and fix it, or I’ll have you transferred instead,” Hunter ordered, finger pointed at Tech’s chest. The threat was empty, of course, but it had fallen on deaf ears regardless.

Tech all but sprinted out into the hall, desperate to change your mind before you left them for good. As much as it pained him to be near you, the thought of being without you was somehow so much worse. He reached your quarters and unceremoniously burst in, barely giving the doors enough time to slide open before he was moving past them.

You jumped at his sudden entrance, hand coming up to clutch your chest.

“Maker, Tech you scared me!”

“Please don’t leave”

You stared at him, taking in his appearance for the first time. His chest was heaving, like he’d just run a marathon, and his eyes were frantic and impossibly wide behind his goggles. You didn’t think you’d ever seen him so disheveled, even when you’d slept with him.

You wanted to look away, but you were conscious of the fact that this was the first time you had made eye contact in Maker knows how long and you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.

“Tech, I-I can’t stay with the way things are. I’m sorry about what I said, I know it was just supposed to be a friend thing and I shouldn’t have fallen in love with you. I really tried not to, but I did and I ruined everything and you can’t even look at me anymore so how can I-“

Tech took step closer, cutting off your rambling as his brow furrowed.

“You fell in love with me?”

He spoke so quietly, it was barely above a whisper. You nodded, confused at his surprised considering the whole issue was that you told him you loved him and he didn’t feel the same. That was the issue, right?

You could practically see the smoke coming out of his ears as he tried to process what was happening.

“I thought… I thought you didn’t mean it”

Now it was your turn to be confused.

“Why would you think that?”

“Y-you didn’t say anything. You confessed your affections for me while in a compromised state and didn’t say anything else afterwards. Your body language indicated regret and-and you left. I concluded that you said it by accident, and did not actually mean it,” he explained as calmly as he could in his rattled state.

“I left because I told you I loved you and you locked yourself in the fresher! And then you wouldn’t talk to me so I figured you were mad at me because I have feelings for you and you don’t feel the same way!”

Tech’s face broke out in a huge grin, and just as you were about to ask him why he was so happy all of a sudden, he rushed forward and passionately slotted his lips against yours. You gasped into him before immediately reciprocating the kiss, and you tangled your hands in his hair as his fingers desperately clutched your hips. Of all the kisses you had shared with him, none had felt the way this one did. There was an emotion pouring into it, one that had always been on the verge of spilling over but never had before. Eventually you broke apart, and you cursed your lungs for needing air.

He leaned his forehead against yours as you both caught your breath, and broke the silence after a few moments.

“I love you, too. I have for a significant amount of time. When you left that night, I incorrectly assumed you did not share my affections. I avoided you after because I… I was hurt. I apologize for misinterpreting your actions, and for allowing you to think that I was upset with you. I assure you, that could not be further from reality.”

You laughed giddily, bumping his nose with yours as you relished in his confession.

“If you loved me, why did you just want to be friends with benefits?”

Tech blushed and look down, a sheepish look overtaking his features.

“Well, I performed a cost-benefit analysis on engaging in a romantic relationship, and the potential complications were too great. A platonic sexual partnership offered a less risky alternative. Although, I must admit that I failed to properly calculate the possible outcomes of such an agreement between two individuals in our specific situation,” he elaborated.

“We might be the two dumbest people in the galaxy,” you joked with a giggle.

“Technically, it is statistically impossible for that to be true, given-“

You cut him off with another deep kiss, your hands coming to rest on his arms as they kept you in his iron-clad grip. He had never loosened his hold, as though he thought if he let you go, you would disappear.

Abruptly, the kiss ended as Tech pulled back slightly to look at you.

“Does this mean you are no longer transferring out of our squad?”

You grinned.

“That depends. Does this mean we can have a real relationship, not just sex?”

Tech brought one hand to rest on his jaw as he looked upwards and pretended to be deep in thought.

“Well, according to my calculations, we have already experienced nearly all of the possible complications of pursuing a romantic relationship, so I have no objection to enjoying some of the benefits,” he concluded with a playful smile.

You leaned up to kiss him again, pausing just before your lips made contact with his to make a sly comment.

“And we know how good we are at some of those benefits already”

[byunmyeon]

Metanoia

↳ pairing: lee suho x reader

↳ synopsis: this is the sequel to philophobia. the world of red strings is one you haven’t been able to see for a long time, and now that you’ve found your unwilling soulmate, you have no interest in regaining that sight.

↳ warnings: language, angst, angst, and more angst, mentions of depression, mentions of death

— note: due to popular demand, here’s part two!

Something was wrong.

There wasn’t some pivotal event or action that made Suho conscious of the shift, he just knew. This premonition could’ve been assessed as an erroneous inkling that emanated from the vast rift between you two, but you hadn’t given any indication that the lack of recognition from your soulmate was the cause. In fact, you seemed perfectly content with disregarding Suho’s existence.

An entire month had gone by since you confronted him, and the entire situation had passed without further incident. Neither one of you had spoken since that ill-fated day.

However, it was impossible not to notice the drastic change in your character. The way you smiled was different in a way that seemed off, and there was also a certain enervation constantly embracing you. But the biggest difference was your lack of interest in just about anything. Suho might’ve thought it had everything to do with him, but again, there was no clear indication of that.

Nonetheless, ignoring you didn’t make him unaware of the unnamed sensation that had latched itself onto him since then.

It’s not like Suho wanted to notice the contrast in your behavior, but it was something he couldn’t help. Every time you came within a ten meter radius, his eyes would compulsively find their way over to you. Suho was always careful to not get caught staring, although it hardly mattered. It’s not like you looked in his general direction anymore. And even when you did happen to meet his gaze, it was for a fleeting moment that passed by so quickly that it couldn’t even be considered a full second.

Your uncharacteristic disposition made him worry. Not for you, but for him. Suho was deeply concerned that you might expose your shared secret in an abrupt moment of anger and hurt. That’s all it was. Nothing more, nothing less.

To his relief, that moment never came.

Even in the face of all the hurtful things he had said and done, you didn’t mention to Jugyeong that Suho was your soulmate. It was a development he hadn’t expected. Sure, you had told him, no, promised him that you would keep silent about the string that bounded you two together, but he was convinced that you could easily change your mind whenever you felt like it. You hadn’t.

Truthfully, your selfless act made him develop a fondness for you. Suho hadn’t expected you to be so understanding and considerate since it seemed like you were genuinely hurt that he didn’t care to acknowledge the bond between you two. That was the part he still couldn’t wrap his head around. You ignored the red string that tied you two together since the day you transferred without any qualm. Your actions convinced him that you wanted nothing to do with the soulmate bond, with him.

“What’s up with Y/N?” Taehoon wondered one day as he set his lunch tray beside Suho’s. “She isn’t looking so good these days.”

The rest of the group agreed.

“Maybe we did something to upset her.” Jugyeong said with a worried frown. Her pretty eyes drifted over to the lonely girl who was currently picking at her food. “She hasn’t wanted to hang out with us since we finished our exams.”

Suho let his own gaze fall over to you. It was true that you had kept your distance since before he officially asked Jugyeong out, but he didn’t think his girlfriend would care too much since you two weren’t that close to begin with. Seeing her so upset didn’t sit well with him.

Maybe he could convince you to start hanging out with Jugyeong and the rest of the group more often. Yes, that’s exactly what he would do. After all, doing him one more favor wouldn’t kill you.

Most people would say that you made a mistake for letting Suho go. Among those people would be your very own mother. You didn’t even want to think about what would happen if she came to find out that you gave up your soulmate without putting up a fight. It wasn’t something you were necessarily proud of, but you weren’t ashamed of your decision. Okay, so maybe refusing to acknowledge your other half wasn’t right or even sane, but you felt comfortable with your decision.

Well, that wasn’t exactly right.

The reality of your soulmate easily ignoring the string he could see was heart-wrenching. More often than not, seeing him and Jugyeong together would cause a stabbing pain in your chest. It would last no more than a second, but it was agonizing enough to have you regretting your righteous choice.

As time when on, the pain worsened and would prolong itself to the point where it became difficult to breathe. There were even instances where black dots would cloud your vision and had you feeling extremely lightheaded. Those times, however, were nothing compared to the occasions when you came close to fainting. Deep down you knew it was because there was a severe imbalance weaved in the depths of your bond.

But you couldn’t be bothered to truly acknowledge it.

Who needed a soulmate anyway?

There had always been an indescribable tension when you were around Suho. Before, you had wrote it off as nerves from being around someone who was as prickly as he was attractive. That was before you knew the truth, of course. You two had never been close, and after finding out that he was the one on the other end of your red string, you were sure you never would be.

Which is exactly why you couldn’t figure out the reason he suddenly came up to you while you were sitting outside on one of the lone benches. He didn’t hesitate to sit next to you, the action coming naturally like it was something he did everyday.

“Jugyeong says you haven’t hung out with her in a while.” Suho said in a slow drawl. “Is it because of me?”

You wished you could’ve scoffed and told him that the world didn’t revolve around him, but you couldn’t. Because even if the world didn’t, yours did.

“I haven’t been feeling well lately.”

It was the truth. Your chest pains were only getting worse as the days went on. It was hard enough to hide it from your mother, you didn’t need the pressure of also hiding it from your classmates.

Suho didn’t seem the least bit concerned for your not-so-well-being, and it had a familiar ache nipping at your heart. You longed to see his face change with even the tiniest bit of emotion. Just so you could feel, even for a fleeting moment, that the bond wasn’t one-sided. After seeing the indifference he looked at you with, you decided to look straight ahead to spare yourself any further heartache.

“Being alone won’t make you feel any better.”

It couldn’t make you feel any worse.

Suho frowned when he saw your unchanging expression. He could never get used to the blank nothingness of it. Not when your joyful expressions had once lit up an entire room.

“I thought you’d be happy that I’m staying away from Jugyeong.” You finally said, still unwilling to look at him.

It made him happier than he cared to admit, but it didn’t make her happy. The entire point of talking to you was to bring Jugyeong the same amount of happiness she’d brought him. If it meant having to swallow his pride and ask you for yet another favor, then so be it.

“She thinks she did something to upset you.” Suho explained. “So I came to ask you to start talking to her again—as a favor.”

His impassive attitude made you feel crestfallen. You knew he couldn’t care less about the bond, about you, but it still hurt to see that he didn’t care to spare your feelings at all. It took everything in you to respond in a strong, calm tone.

“And you’re okay with me talking to her again?”

“I’m fine as long as you stick to our agreement.”

You nodded slowly, pensively. If it would make Suho happy, then you would do it.

“Okay.”

That was his cue to leave, but he found himself unwilling to do so. Immediately, Suho assumed it was because your souls were intertwined with one another which, in turn, fueled the natural instinct to be close to you. That had to be it.

Suho cleared his throat and stood up. “I’ll see you around.”

Sitting across a psychiatrist was something you never thought you would have to do again. And yet, you found yourself sitting across from the infamous Dr. Kwon. The aforementioned doctor was known worldwide for his trailblazing research on the enigmatic soulmate bond. His fame soared when he revealed that he had successfully treated people who were rejected by their soulmates. For an entire year, it was all anyone could talk about.

And like a moth to a flame, your mother was quick to reach out to his office and make an appointment for a consultation. There was a five month waiting list for this, and now it was finally your turn to meet with the prestigious psychiatrist, much to your dismay.

“There’s no need to feel nervous,” he said kindly when he noticed your uncomfortable posture. “Anything you tell me will stay between the two of us.”

You had heard the same thing countless times, but the words always seemed disingenuous no matter who they came from. Even if Dr. Kwon had treated people who had soulmate problems, you were sure that he’d never met someone like you. His eyes were kind, but you didn’t know whether you could trust him. Plenty of the other specialists had also been kind at first until they realized that treating you like a lab rat would lead to a life of fame and fortune.

“Your mother tells me that you were unofficially diagnosed with philophobia. She believes the cause of your condition is due to the fact that you are unable to see your string of fate.”

You weren’t surprised that your mom had told him everything about you already. She had made the same mistake with all the other doctors and therapists. You could deny it, but you figured if you were to become a lab rat, you couldn’t be in better hands.

“She also mentioned that you haven’t been yourself lately.”

Shit. You hadn’t thought that your mom had caught onto your behavior. The simple thought of her finding out the secret you were desperately trying to keep hidden made your stomach twist with panic.

Your shrug was uncommitted as you fought to control your expression. “She’s thought that since I told her I couldn’t see my string anymore.”

Dr. Kwon hummed. “Your mother is convinced that a severe trauma led you to lose the sight of your string. Would you mind telling me about that?”

You clutched the sleeves of your uniform as a way of comfort. Talking about that was something you never wanted to do. Somehow, spending an entire year repeating the story to countless specialists never helped you get over it. Despite that, you knew your mother wouldn’t forgive you if you didn’t make the effort to “get better.”

“Around the time I turned eleven, I found out that my parents were getting a divorce.” You began. There was a harsh edge to your words that you couldn’t control. “They were soulmates, but my dad said that he didn’t love my mom anymore.”

Dr. Kwon nodded, encouraging you to go on.

“This one day, he decided to drive me to school instead of letting me take the bus. On the way there he told me about this woman he’d met like I’d actually be happy for him or something. I got so angry that I just– I just snapped.”

It was silent for a moment before you continued.

“I told him that I hated him. That I would never forgive him for hurting my mom.” You swallowed thickly. “That was the last thing I said to him before we got into a car accident. He died on the way to the hospital.”

You didn’t realize that the moisture in your eyes was dripping down your face until Dr. Kwon handed you a tissue. He didn’t say anything for a while, and it surprised you. Most of the specialists you had seen couldn’t keep their thoughts to themselves after hearing your story.

“It’s not your fault.” Dr. Kwon said. “You feel an extreme guilt, but you shouldn’t. We all say things we don’t mean, and parents know that better than anyone.”

His words were comforting, but his kind expression was marred when he started speaking like a doctor. You only half-listened to Dr. Kwon, not interested in his spiel about how making an attempt to picture your string might help. If only he knew that over the better part of your early adolescence, visualizing that stupid red string was all you did.

You hadn’t realized that your time with him was nearly over until he started writing on his clipboard. It made you feel relieved, in a way. But there was still one thing you needed. You couldn’t leave without asking him about the one thing that had been weighing on your mind.

“Doctor,” your voice was hesitant. “You’ve treated patients whose soulmates rejected the bond, right?”

“That’s right.”

“Has… Has anyone ever died from being rejected?”

Dr. Kwon shook his head. “Most of them complained about chronic chest pains, but they faded over time after they got used to being away from their soulmate.”

You swallowed thickly. That’s not what you were hoping to hear.

“So, if someone were to constantly be around the person who rejected them… it could be fatal?”

This time, you caught the subtle narrowing of his eyes. Shit. He was onto you. “Is there a reason you’re asking me this?”

“I’m just curious. You’re the only doctor who’s come close to figuring out the real effects of rejecting the bond.”

He didn’t seem convinced, but answered you anyway. “It’s possible, but I can’t be certain since I haven’t had a patient who was willing to be around their soulmate after being rejected.”

You nodded, not liking the ugly feeling in your chest.

“I’m willing to keep working with you.” He said, seemingly not interested in the motives behind your questions. “Hopefully, we can reverse your condition.”

“I have no intention of seeing the string again.”

Dr. Kwon was taken aback. “Y-You don’t? Why?”

Because I already found my soulmate and he loves someone else. The truth was on the tip of your tongue, but you knew you couldn’t tell him.

“I just don’t.”

The first time you went an entire day without experiencing the chest pains was the same day you spent an entire lunch period with Suho.

Since the back of the school was now tainted with horrible memories, you could no longer go back there to find solace. Now your new designated safe space was the school’s rooftop. You were content with listening to music and feeling the warm breeze on your skin. It was also extremely private, which meant that if you did experience the chest pains, no one would see.

Your eyes were closed in blissful peace when you suddenly felt a presence beside you. Unaccustomed to the sudden company, you jumped with shocked fear. Once you saw that it was Suho who was sitting next to you, your heart was racing for an entirely different reason. He hadn’t said much. Unexpectedly, he asked you what you were listening to.

That’s how you found out you shared the same taste in music.

The second time you went an entire day without feeling the chest pains was the day you stumbled on a crying Suho.

He was completely overcome with grief that he didn’t seem to care that he was in the middle of the hallway. You quietly took him to the roof where he collapsed on you. The way he clutched onto you reminded you of an inconsolable child—fearful and in need of comfort. You listened to him as he told you about his late friend and his battle with depression.

Your heart ached with every word he told you, but if countless hours of therapy had taught you anything it was that venting could do wonders for the soul. Eventually, his sobs turned into sniffles. He hadn’t let go of you and vice versa.

After that, Suho didn’t say anything and neither did you. Unbeknownst to the either of you, the connection between you two had gotten stronger. There was an inexplicable congruity between you now, one that allowed you to understand and empathize with each other’s feelings.

You two never mentioned it again, but something shifted after that day.

It had been a month since you last felt the scathing pain. Now it was only a tolerable discomfort that you grew used to. You and Suho weren’t close, he still had his girlfriend, but now there were these moments that you experienced every so often. Ones that seemed more intimate than any relationship you could ever have. Those times were the happiest you’d felt in years.

“Things are pretty serious between Suho and Jugyeong.” Soo-ah said when you two entered the lunch room. “He wants her to study abroad with him after graduation.”

This was news to you, and that familiar discomfort soon settled on the left side of your chest. In spite of knowing that nothing had changed, you still felt like a complete fool. How could you be so delusional? Suho had only been kind to you a handful of times, and you were sure it had only been out of pure instinct. It had been because the link between you two had pushed him to do it.

Suddenly, the discomfort grew into that familiar, unwelcome stabbing pain, one greater than all the others you had felt so far. You let out a loud cry, the high-pitched noise sounding horrifying even to your own ears. The dizziness never came this quickly, but now it was clouding your senses within seconds. It had you stumbling into Soo-ah, and you grabbed ahold of her sleeve to try to steady yourself. You could see her mouth moving, but her words were muted. Oh no.

The pounding in your head and the sharp pains in your chest came in waves. It didn’t take long for the dark spots to appear. Fuck.

The last thing you remembered was seeing Soo-ah and a gathering crowd above you before darkness overcame you.

“Y/N.”

The distant sound of your name being called was enough to have you slowly opening your eyes. Your vision was blurry and unfocused. All you could make out was being in a brightly lit place that had you wincing. Where were you?

In the next second, you felt a pair of arms wrap around you. The familiar scent of your mom’s perfume made you relax.

“How are you feeling?”

It was a man’s voice who asked the question, and you nearly choked on your own spit when you saw Dr. Kwon standing beside the hospital bed. His presence shocked you since you had only met him once and weren’t officially his patient. However, you managed to assure him that you felt fine.

For a second, you thought everything would be fine. After all, there was no technology that was capable of determining that your collapse was related to your fractured soulmate bond. That is, until Dr. Kwon decided to speak up.

“You’ve met your soulmate, haven’t you?”

It wasn’t really a question. Your panicked eyes fell over to your mom. The look she gave you had you wincing. Fuck.

“What!? Y/N—”

“Mom,” you said, panicked. “It’s not– I don’t—”

“I’ve spoken with the doctor who treated you. She said that there’s been an enormous strain on your heart.” His voice had an underlying hardness that tipped you off on the anger he was feeling. “That’s why you asked me about my patients the other day, isn’t it?”

You remained silent, and it gave him his answer.

“You know who your soulmate is. They rejected the bond, but you haven’t. That’s why your chest pains have gotten worse.”

Before you could try to refute any of his claims, your mother went crazy.

“Who is it!?” She yelled. “Tell me right now so I can tell him to stop hurting my daughter!”

You attempted to calm her down, but your attempt was in vain. There was no possible way to settle her emotions. Not when her worst fear had been realized. You tried to ease her mind by reassuring her that you would go away in order to receive treatment from Dr. Kwon, not realizing that Suho was standing outside the room and heard everything.

Dr. Kwon managed to calm your mother down and convinced her to take a walk with him. It was late in the evening now, and you felt extremely relieved to finally be left alone with your thoughts. You got all of two seconds of contemplation because in the next second, Suho pulled the door open and walked into your room.

He didn’t say anything at first, but his face was the picture of tortured. You furrowed your eyebrows, unable to understand why he seemed so distraught.

“You’re dying.” Suho’s voice trembled. “Because of me.”

The fact that he somehow found out went over your head. You wished you could say no. No it’s not because of you. But you couldn’t. Trying to reassure him would’ve been futile. He knew. You both did. The urge to cling onto the severed bond would be fatal if you didn’t get help. Despite knowing all that, you wished to ease his pain. You could’ve laughed at your own foolishness because right now it was you who was laying in the hospital bed.

“I won’t die.” You told him feebly. “I’ll leave. Once I get used to being away from you, I’ll be okay. We can both live normal lives.”

Suho wanted to tell you that he didn’t want you to leave. That his life hadn’t ever been normal, and he was fine with that as long as you could be part of it.

“You didn’t reject the bond. Why?”

You looked up at the white ceiling. The tears were pooling in your eyes, but you refused to let them fall. There was no point in hiding it anymore. Not when you were hospitalized because of him.

“I can’t see my string.”

Your confession hung in the air like a dark cloud. It was silent before you decided to continue with your revelation.

“I haven’t been able to see it since I was thirteen.” You tried to swallow the lump in your throat. “That’s why I didn’t acknowledge you when we first saw each other. I didn’t know.”

The candor of your words had Suho staggering back. It felt like someone shoved a blade straight through his heart. Finally, everything made sense. It’s not that you weren’t interested in your soulmate, it’s that you hadn’t known he was right in front of you. He couldn’t stop the tears from gathering in his eyes. What had he done?

“I’ve always wanted to meet my soulmate.” You confessed, feeling a bit embarrassed. “Even after I found out that it was you and you didn’t feel the same way, I never wished that I hadn’t met you. I never wished that the bond didn’t exist.”

You knew he couldn’t say the same since the evidence of just how much he didn’t want the bond was displayed in your current physical state.

“You should leave,” you told him even though the words pained you greatly. “My mom will get suspicious if she sees you.”

Only a small piece of your heart broke when he listened to you.

When Jugyeong and Suho broke up, it was the talk of the entire school. You yourself couldn’t make sense of the sudden separation, but you told yourself that it didn’t matter because it wasn’t any of your business.

You only said goodbye to a handful of people when the last day at Saebom High came around. Your short stay at the school didn’t give you an opportunity to make many friends, and it’s not like you truly wanted to remember your experience at the school.

Before you could walk through the front gates toward your new life, you were stopped by the sound of your name being called.

“Y/N!”

You turned, feeling your eyes widen when you were suddenly wrapped up in your soulmate’s warm embrace. His sudden change in attitude shocked you so much that you weren’t sure how to react.

“Don’t leave me. Please.”

For the first time since you’d met Suho, you felt no need to placate him. After everything that happened, you couldn’t go back on the promise you made to your mother. You needed to get better. Not for Suho, but for yourself.

“I’m sorry.” You were sincere. “This time, I’m leaving you behind.”

He pulled back. The pain in his eyes was another strike to your chest, but you knew you couldn’t give in.

“Goodbye, Lee Suho.”

[thedumpsterqueen]

Standards of Performance, Chapter 12: What Happens in Alleyways

From the Beginning,  Previous Chapter

AO3 Link

Sorry it's a lil short, it's more of a transition chapter to actually jumping into this case and Reader's now even more confusing "relationship" with Hotch. Things get kinkier and angrier and more explicit from here, but I'll do my best to tag stuff. Thanks for your patience as always, guys, especially amidst the dumpster fire that is current events right now <3 Your reblogs and tags slay me and I love it.

Summary: You’re the BAU’s newest intern, desperate to prove yourself amongst an established team of much more experienced profilers. Agent Hotchner, the seemingly infallible team leader, sets strict expectations for your performance. He commands your respect without even trying, but is there something more to your relationship than a simple desire to impress your stony-faced boss?

Chapter Summary: Turns out, the world doesn't stop on its axis just because you had sex with your boss. You’re unsure whether or not that’s a good thing.

Words: 1,882

Rating: Explicit, 18+. Violence, dark themes, explicit sexual content. More specific warnings on AO3.

Pairings: Hotch x Reader, Hotch x You

You awoke to the dim light of the dawn, rain gently pattering on the windows, and the blaring sound of Hotch’s ringtone three feet from your face.

“Jesus christ, old man,” you groaned, blinking your eyes open, “turn your hearing aids up.”

Already sitting up in bed, he paused with the phone halfway to his ear.

Shit. You were being too casual - waking up in his bed, joking with him. Acting like you belonged there. You didn’t know how he felt about what happened, for all you knew he regretted every second and-

“You’re paying for that later,” he smiled before answering the call.

The playful threat filled you with relief before it made your stomach flip, and the memories of last night came flooding back. His body, his eyes, his hands all burned inside your eyelids as if you’d been staring directly at the sun. You’d never been in this situation before - waking up next to someone you’d spent the night with and desperately hoping it was the first time rather than the last. But you’d also never felt your body sing with the white-hot pleasure it did when it was touched by the seemingly unattainable man who did so last night, so. There was that.

The low rumble of his voice brought you back to the present, and you looked up at his face to find it was twisted up in concentration, resignation, and something else.

“I’ll be right down,” he said, standing up swiftly and pulling his work clothes on with practiced speed. “Don’t let anyone touch anything.”

He shoved his phone in his suit pocket and looked at you, still tangled up in his sheets.

“Get dressed and meet me downstairs,” he said, terse. “There’s a body in the alley outside the building.”

“Outside this building?”

“Yes,” he responded, “and there’s a note.”

As he swept out the door, leaving you reeling, you realized what the other expression on his face was. Fear.

***

Hotch had gotten ready and exited the apartment before you had even processed the situation, and your mind was racing a mile a minute as you flung yourself out of bed and scrambled to get dressed. The logical assumption, of course, was that the stalker had left the body. People didn’t just end up dead in alleyways in this part of town, and certainly not in the middle of a rainstorm mere floors from where the BAU Unit Chief slept - not without a reason.

You threw on your coat and boots, forgoing contacts and makeup in favor of your glasses and a hat to cover the tangled mess last night’s tryst had made of your hair. Without even pausing to look in a mirror, you scurried down the stairwell and exited the lobby into the cold October wind.

It was easy to tell which alley the body occupied - there were an excess of thirty people milling in and out of the space to the right of the building. Crime scene investigators, policemen, and other personnel talked in hushed voices. You spotted a clearing in the sea of people and knew that’s where the victim would be, given a wide berth per Hotch’s instruction.

The team hung out at the edge of the circle watching Reid, who was kneeling in front of the body slumped against the side of the apartment building. Moving closer, you could tell he was in the middle of one of his spiels, gesturing wildly while the everyone nodded along. You joined the group that had formed around him and caught the middle of what seemed to be a hypothesis about victimology.

“ -no patterns, obviously, but if we assume similar characteristics would be present in all his victims, it’s hard to discern what statement he could be making. Positing a male in his mid-to-late twenties is statistically most likely, but stalkers of this age group also frequently have some sort of sexual motivation, and if the autopsy is consistent with what we can observe now,” he gestured to the body, “I don’t think that’s the case here.”

Throughout his speech, you’d been scrutinizing the victim - a brunette women who looked to be no older than 20, arranged in a half-sitting position against the wall behind her. There was no blood anywhere you could see, in fact, she barely looked dead at all, likely thanks to the below-freezing temperatures last night that had put a pause on the early stages of decomposition. Pinned to her shirt was a white envelope that bore an ominous message in bold, black ink:

“For my friends at the BAU.”

Not hard to guess who had killed this woman.

“Can you determine cause of death, Spence?” Prentiss asked, her arms folded.

“I’m not sure, but if I had to guess…” he used his pen to push the victim’s hair to the side, exposing a neck mottled with stark blue bruises. 

“Anger, then,” you offered, speaking to the psychological drivers behind strangulation, “but I doubt we’ll find any sign of sexual assault. The unsub made it clear that his disdain is directed towards us; it’s not likely that would extend to his victim.”

The rest of the team nodded in thought, but Hotch looked at you in surprise, as if just noticing your presence. As his eyes glued on yours, his face changed, and he grabbed your arm in an unpleasantly tight grip.

“Open the note. I’ll just be a moment.”

Unaware of his boss’ sudden change in demeanor and the vice on your elbow, Morgan gloved up and reached for the envelope. Hotch, meanwhile, unceremoniously dragged you down the alleyway and around to the deserted back side of the building.

“What the hell?” you hissed, yanking your arm out of his grip.

“Did you fail to look in a mirror before you came down here?” Hotch’s narrowed stare betrayed nothing but contempt, and you scrambled to determine the implication of his question.

“I’m sorry, did you want me to take a shower before looking at the dead body? I did the best I could, it seemed urgent -”

“No,” he snapped, “I’m referring to the fact that your neck looks worse off than our victim’s does.”

You processed his words for a moment before the implication hit you.

“Are you talking about the hickies?! Christ, Hotch, I’ll get a scarf then. Just give me a second!”

“Please do. I’d like my agents to appear professional, not like they’re college kids coming off a one night stand.”

His words halted your stomp back into the building, and you turned back, furious.

“You put them there! How is this my fault?”

“I didn’t think I would have to be this explicit about the fact that I don’t want the fact that we had sex last night broadcast to everyone at the crime scene.”

You gaped at him in disbelief.

“Are you embarrassed or something? I’m sorry if you regret what happened, but you don’t need to lash out at me like this -”

“I’m not lashing out,” he interrupted, “I’m informing you of my expectations for my agents. Is there a problem?”

You wanted to scream at him. You wanted to smack that perfectly raised eyebrow and controlled expression right off his face. But he was boxing you in - speaking to you as your boss and not the man you slept with last night, and as much as you hated him for it, your sense of self-preservation won out.

“There’s no problem,” you mumbled, unable to make eye contact as you slipped past him and around the building.

You made it halfway up the stairwell before the tears started flowing. Had you really thought sleeping with him was going to change something? That he was going to ask you to be his fucking girlfriend, like he wasn’t the chief of your unit and you weren’t a twenty-something intern? For all you knew, he did this all the time. His level of skill in the area certainly made it seem like he did.

That wasn’t true, though, you knew it. He may not reveal much, but you could tell it had been a fraught decision to let your relationship develop the way it had. Perhaps even a decision he regretted now - and it certainly seemed so, given his behavior.

Wiping tears on your sleeve, you fumbled with the spare key he’d given you to his apartment and walked in. You glanced in the mirror by the entrance and your eyes nearly bugged out of your head. Hotch wasn’t exaggerating when he likened the marks to strangulation - indigo smudges, still peppered with the angry red of burst capillaries, circled your throat.

It was a juvenile, possessive, ridiculous display, and Hotch was absolutely right to label it unprofessional. And yet, the thought that you’d walked onto the scene bearing the marks he’d given you filled you with a thrill so intense you had to brace yourself against the entryway table and clamp your legs together.

Breathe. There’s still a fucking murder scene downstairs.

You steadied yourself and headed for your duffel bag, where you’d thankfully packed a scarf in preparation for the cold snap that was predicted to hit the state this week. Midway through unzipping your bag, though, your eyes landed on his dresser and the devil sitting on your shoulder, buzzing with a deadly combination of anger and arousal, whispered a terrible, reckless idea in your ear.

***

You practically skipped downstairs to rejoin the team, who appeared to be engaged in a lively debate about the contents of the envelope Morgan was holding. After gloving up, you reached out a hand towards him.

“Can I read it?”

He handed it over, distracted by another stream of consciousness from Reid. Hotch took note of your return and glanced in your direction before turning back to the conversation.

You pretended to read the note and waited for him to notice.

You waited all of three seconds.

He whipped his head back so comically fast you struggled to suppress a snort, and you knew exactly what he was looking at. A midnight blue cashmere scarf, nicked from his dresser and wrapped artfully around your neck to cover the bruises, just like he’d asked. The first compliment you’d ever paid him was in regards to this scarf; tentatively whispered when he’d worn it to a chilly 2 am crime scene. He’d accepted the compliment passively, but the optimistic part of you had noted that he seemed to wear it much more frequently after that.

You weren’t entirely sure what statement you were intending to make by wearing it, but his reaction told you you’d certainly succeeded at provoking something.

Morgan reached back out for the note you were still pretending to read and dropped it in an evidence bag. If he noticed Hotch steaming from the ears next to you, he didn’t say so.

“They’re ready to pack everything up and head back to the lab. Let’s meet ‘em there?”

Everyone nodded in the affirmative and headed back to the SUVs.

“You riding with me?” Morgan asked, nudging your ribs with an elbow.

“No,” Hotch answered for you, an unseen hand suddenly gripping the back of your neck. “She’s not.”

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[lils-writes-stuff]

Where it all started

Best years part one| part two

Spencer Reid x reader

Summary: while on a case, a little to close to home, reader and Spencer discover some feeling that they’ve developed for each other over time.

Warnings: normal criminal minds things, kinda slow build up ngl.

A/n: this takes place after the whole Doyle thing, so it’s the dream team all together.

   “No I mean all I’m saying is if you are too play online scrabble you have to know that the other person is probably cheating.”

   The laughter that rang from Emily’s mouth also made Y/N chuckle after the statement she made. The two sat in the bullpen, Emily in her swivel chair, Y/N perched on the end of her desk, ankles crossed and coffee mug in hand.

   The sound of phones ringing and people chatting created a white noise scenario in Y/N’s ears. The sound was interrupted though by the clicking of heels from Penelope Garcia, as she came walking into the room. File in hand, ready to deliver it to Hotch.

   “Ah- come on people, I had a weekend planned!” Emily said, slightly disappointed as she saw Garcia walk into Hotch’s office.  Derek chuckled, shaking his head slightly.

   “And what were those plans?” Derek asks the smug look on his face, telling those around that he was ready to crack a joke for any scenario that followed after her answer.

   “Me, wine, and a hot tube,” Emily replied with a sigh as she leaned into the back of her chair. Derek just laughed as he turned back to his mug of fresh coffee sitting on Spencer’s desk.

   “I hope we have a case, I didn’t have plans,” Spencer’s voice is monotone almost. He doesn’t even look up from his book while he speaks. At this, a slight giggle leaves Y/N’s lips.

   “Me neither Spence, me neither.” Y/N says as she pushes herself off of Emily’s desk, tapping Spencer's shoulder on the way back to her own desk and sitting in her chair.

   “This is 29-year-old Dillon Goodman, he was found in a ditch in the North Georgia region, stab wounds to the stomach and upper chest region,” Penelope spoke as the picture of the victim appeared on the screen. Pictures from the crime scene soon followed the driver’s license photo.

   “He’s laid out like a burial, shows remorse.” Y/N spoke as she looked more closely at the pictures in her hand. The victim looked familiar to her, yet she couldn’t place it.

   “North Georgia, Y/N isn’t that your stomping grounds?” Rossi spoke, looking at Y/N with furrowed brows.

   “That it is,” she spoke, eyes still trained at the victim who she could still not place as to how she knew.

   “Atlanta P.D. has this case because two days ago another body was found in Fulton county, same M.O., also laid out the same,” Hotch said as Penelope pulled another picture up of the first victim.

   “Any I.D. on this one?” Derek asked. Penelope shook her head as a response.

   “So this guy shows remorse for his dead victims but the overkill is extreme,” JJ spoke as she looked at the rest of the team.

   “The burial like the placement of the bodies looks like those that  Vikings did, they were known as Norse funerals, but they were placed in ships as their burial,” Spencer spoke, as he looked at the victim’s photos more.

   “We’ll have more time to discuss this on the plane if he keeps up his two-day cycle, we only have that to catch him before he kills another, wheels up in 30,” Hotch said as he stood up, signaling everyone to get their go bags and depart.

————

   The plane ride wasn’t long but it was enough to give the team time to discuss theories as to why someone with such overkill in the process of killing and so much remorse after.

   Y/N looked intently at the license photo of the second victim Dillon. It was on the tip of her  tongue as to how she knew him but she couldn’t figure it out.

   “Y/N, the look on your face is hurting me, what’re you thinking?” Rossi asked as he broke her out of her stare.

   Y/N looked up, a slight hum sound leaving her throat. “Sorry, it’s just-this victim, Dillon, he looks so familiar, and I can’t place it and it’s really bothering me.” She spoke, slight irritation evident in her voice.

   “I might be able to answer that for you,” Garcia’s voice was heard through the speaker of the laptop placed on the table, everyone’s attention now focused there. “Dillon Goodman, born December 19, 1982, in Cleveland, Tennessee moved to Georgia when he was ten, and went to our beloved Y/N’s high school and were actually in the same graduating class together.”

   “Oh my god, that’s right I remember him now!” Y/N said as the memory of the boy came to her mind.

   “Does anything you remember help us with this case, any enemies, stuff like that?” Hotch asked looking at Y/N.

   “No he was a good kid, didn’t make good grades, but he was nice. Didn’t have problems with anyone really, to my knowledge at least.”

   “Garcia, is there any I.D. on the first victim yet?” Spencer asked.

   “Yes, a 31-year-old Tyler Moore, also from the North Georgia region,” Garcia said as she continued to type on her computer. “Oh my- he also graduated from Y/N’s high school too.”

   “Same class?” Emily asked.

   “No, he graduated two years before Y/N and Dillon,” Garcia replied looking at the date in her screen

   Everyone’s eyebrows furrowed.

   “Well there’s the common denominator for all our victims, they all went to the same high school,” Emily said.

   “So someone must’ve had a grudge against these two, maybe they were apart of a group our unsub wanted to be part of,” Derek said. “That would explain the remorse, he wanted to be apart of their lives.”

   “Cliques would cause something like this, high school is when we develop who we are the most,” Spencer said looking at everyone. “If this unsub was rejected from this group, it probably formed some deep aggression in him that caused him to lash out.”

   “So these probably weren’t his first victims,” JJ said.

   “Probably,” Hotch agreed. “When we land, Rossi and Morgan go to the first crime scene, Y/N and Reid to the newest, the rest of us will set up point at the station.”

————

   “So, did you know our first victim too?” Spencer asked Y/N as they drove to the latest crime scene. Y/N looked over for a second, glancing him before turning her attention back to the road.

   While the rest of the team had been together for a while, she had only been there for a year. She joined a little while before Emily’s ‘death’, it hit her just as hard as the rest of the team. She was relatively new out of the Academy, but every unit wanted her. She had the scores, a good shot, and when she was given team experience she was a huge help. Strauss said to Hotch when she told him that Y/N was joining their team, it was the best decision she could make for them.

   “I think so, I remember the name, he was a football player, wasn’t as good as a kid as Dillon though,” she said eyes trained in the road as she drove. “He got in trouble for bullying a lot.”

   Spencer nodded, “Were you a part of any clubs or groups that had these guys in them?” He continued with his questions to her.

   Spencer looked over, the side profile of Y/N’s face captivating him for a second before he looked away back at the file.

   “I-I wasn’t really a club person, I played sports. And when I didn’t play sports, I was working,” Y/N spoke as she reminisced on her high school experience. Never the star, but her name was known. A good group of friends, slight teasing from guys for her looks, but nothing serious.

   “Turn left, and we’ll be there,” Spencer’s instructions pulled her from her memories.

   They pulled up to the sight of the crime scene. A ditch beside the lake that Y/N grew up swimming in. Local police were there waiting for the two as they exited the SUV.

   “Detective Callaghan?” Y/N asked the man in front of her.

   “Yes ma’am,” the detective responded.

   “Hi, SSA Y/N Y/L/N,” she said shaking his hand then pointed next to her. “This is Dr. Spencer Reid.” Spencer stuck his hand up in a wave.

   “Thanks for coming out, let me show you to the dumpsite.” The detective led the two of them over about 30 yards to where the body was discovered. “A couple of fishermen called it in early this morning.”

   Spencer squatted down to look closer to the victim that was still on the ground. “The overkill is extreme,” he spoke inspecting the stab wounds of the victim.

   The two talked to the detective some more and looked at the body trying to figure out some more ideas as to how this unsub thinks. The ME came and took the body away and Y/N and Spencer we’re back in the SUV on their way to the station.

   “You know, I pegged you more of a mean girl in high school,” Spencer said as Y/N began to drive.

   Y/N laughed as she looked at Spencer for a second who also had a smile on his face. “Why do you say that?”

   “Well, you have a very dominant personality, and taking into account with how you are very pretty,” he said, blushing slightly at his statement before clearing his throat to finish his thought. “I just would have pegged you to be a mean girl.”

   “I was definitely not a mean girl,” Y/N said, her head shaking at the statement. “I wasn’t always very assertive and pretty.” She stated matter-of-factly.

   “Really?”

   “Really! I was a follower. I played sports, but I was never a star. I was good, but I wasn’t the best.” She explained, “I wasn’t pretty either, well pretty for the standards of the boys around me.”

   I would have thought you were beautiful, was Spencer’s thought.

   “What were you like I’m high school?”

   “I was twelve, so my name was known, but as the butt of the joke,” he spoke remembering his high school experience.

   Y/N giggled, remembering how she was younger than all of her classmates since she skipped a grade.

————

   Morgan, JJ, Spencer, and Y/N sat around a large conference table, coffee cups and food containers filling in the spaces that didn’t have open files. It had been a day since they arrived meaning the time they had left in the cool off period was coming to an end.

   “Okay, so this unsub is killing those who we are assuming were apart of some group?” JJ asked as she took another sip from her coffee cup next to her.

   “Well, actually I can confirm they were apart of a group. A clique if you will, one that went of for years and years after one group graduated,” Penelope said over Derek’s phone. “A group that called themselves the ‘wolves’. Were these boys, and an occasional girl, would go and harass older couples and vandalize their homes.”

   “So these guys weren’t all that good of kids like Y/N said,” Derek spoke. Y/N leaned back, tracing her memory to think if she had ever heard them speak of this group before. 

   “This must have not been talked about a lot in front of me cause I do not remember this,” Y/N spoke as she looked at her tablet in front of her, an article of the group sent from Penelope on the screen. 

   She looked at the photo of the group of mostly boys, gazing over the stoic faces in the picture. One stuck out though, the boy in the photo couldn’t be older than 15, his eyes still and his face just seemed off to her. 

   “Penelope, what can you tell me about Alex Wright?” Y/N asked as she looked at the boy’s name in the bio below the photo. 

   “Alex Wright, 15 at the time the photo was taken, a Sophomore, he didn’t seem to do much, raised by his single mom, didn’t play sports, he was a loner,” She explained as she typed on her computer. 

   “He fits the profile you think it’s him Y/N?” JJ asked her as she looked at the boy in the photo also. 

   Y/N shook her head, “No, but I think he might be the key to finding out who is.” She explained her thoughts. 

   “Why do you say that?” Spencer asked her, a questioning look on his face as he looked at her. 

   “Look at his eyes in the photo,” she said pointing at him. 

   “He looks scared,” Derek said as he examined the boy in the photo.

   “Almost like he’s there against his will,” Spencer said agreeing with what he was saying. “Guys, what if he is our unsub? What if he is getting back at all those in the group who made him do those things.” 

   “That would explain the overkill,” JJ said adding in her input into theory. 

   “And also the remorse, he probably considered them as friends,” Spencer continued on his theory. Everyone continued on the thought and soon came to the conclusion that Alex Wright was more than likely the unsub. 

   “Garcia-” Y/N started but was cut off. 

   “Addresses already sent,” she said knowing the answer to the upcoming question. 

   “You’re the best Baby Girl,” Derek said before hanging up. 

   They gathered with the rest of the team and told them their theory. Hotch got everyone together and they all loaded up into the cars. Vests on ready to go as they came to a halt at the front of the house. 

   “Rossi, JJ, and Morgan you guys go round back, the rest of us will take the front,” Hotch instructed and they all followed and got into position. 

   Spencer, Y/N, Hotch, and Emily all went up front and readied to open the door. 

   “Alex Wright, FBI,” Hotch said with a loud voice. A loud crash was heard and within seconds the door was open and the four of them moved in. 

   Alex stood, knife to the throat of his next victim who was tied to a table. 

   “Get back, leave!” He screamed at the four. 

   “We can’t do that Alex,” Y/N spoke, gun pointed ready to shoot. 

   “Y/N, it’s good to see you,” Alex spoke a small smirk on his face. Y/N turned her head to the side, questioning what he just spoke. 

   “I’m sorry, do I know you,” she said a puzzling tone in her voice. 

    Alex scoffed and stood up straight, pointing the knife in his hand at Y/N. “Of course you don’t, no one remembers me, the loner, the outcast. So stereotypical, if it wasn’t for me that school wouldn’t have been what it was. The wolves would have killed all of you, but I convinced them not to, of course, no one believed me when I told them though. Because all those boys were so good and loved. Well, news flash, they were rotten. So they all must pay.” He finished his speech, ready to stab his next victim, but he stopped and looked up at Y/N. “You know they always spoke highly of you like you were their queen or something so maybe I should just kill you,” and at that he launched himself at Y/N ready to stab her. 

   Gunshot. 

   The smoke from Spencer’s gun went off as he shot Alex in the arm before he got any closer to them. The other three looked at him, before going over and cuffing the man. 

----------

   The team sat together around a table wine glasses in front of them and plates of food smelling oh-so-delightful. Celebrating the win from this case, Rossi stated that Y/N take them to a restaurant she spoke of loving when she grew up, his treat of course. The team laughed as they discussed stories from their own high school experiences, telling of memorable moments and embarrassing stories.

   “Y/N, do you know why Alex said they treated you like their queen?” Emily asked with a laugh at the statement that was made by the unsub.

   “Oh-uh, well I think I figured it out, I looked at the photo again and I remember there was a boy in high school, that had a huge crush on me, he- I’m assuming- was the ring leader of this whole clique,” she said with a giggle. Everyone laughed at this and continued with a conversation about high school. 

   Y/N glanced across the table at Spencer, who also glanced at her. The eye contact made gave Spencer a slight blush on his face and made Y/N giggle slightly. 

   Grow a pair Y/N, she thought to herself, invite him to dinner or something this light flirting thing can’t last forever. 

   Emily nudged Derek beside her, everyone else distracted with a story Rossi was telling. 

   “When will those two realize that they are in love with each other?” Emily asked the man beside her. 

   He chuckled, “When Pretty Boy realizes that, she might as well be throwing herself at him.” The two giggled at the statement. 

   Y/N looked at Spencer once more, a small smile laid on her lips as she watched him laugh at the story that was being told. The little butterflies in her stomach erupted as she watched him. She looked away before he could notice and listened to the ongoing story. 

   As Y/N looked away, Spencer looked at her. He watched her smile and her eyes light up. 

She’s beautiful

[fireemblems24]

I am so glad you pointed out the imperialist vibes Edelgard has sometimes. As someone who lives in a country who was basically occupied ahem conquered because they said "we have better ideas that will improve your lives" and had our culture absolutely shattered, one of the main reasons why I disagree with Edelgard so much is because of that. She thinks her point of view is superior and the most morally right and I really don't like it whenever she sounds so confused about people defending their homeland. Especially that one line she has with Dimitri in Chapter 17 ffffff—

Like, girl, they have the fucking right to disagree with you please stop sounding so confused as to why they can't see eye to eye with you gahhhhh

I would be more tolerant with the war if she had say, did diplomacy before it? But she tried to had Dimitri and Claude killed in Part I (the prologue). I would also understand her better if the war was a last resort and the other leaders were corrupt and all that. But they're not. Many of the students (who have power because many are noble heirs) outside her house are heavily affected by the nobility and Crests (Sylvain, Ingrid, Mercedes, Lysithea, etc.) or at least understanding of the problems caused by them (Dimitri). It's so frustrating how so much of this can be prevented if she just talked about it.

Also, to those who said she wants the change to be quick, even with war it won't be. The fucking war basically caused continent-wide damage. It's going to be so hard to actually fix this. Hell, there's definitely going to be an eventual rebellion by former Kingdom / Alliance people or sympathisers. It's not going to be as clean cut as the game or some pro-Edelgard people make it to be. Not everyone is going to agree with her, whether she takes over or not. She just destroyed the stability of the continent and while yes, she can rebuild it again, it will still take time and who's to say future leaders won't be corrupt? Also, a hierarchy will always exist, whether she likes it or not. Especially if she plans to set up a meritocracy. Meritocracy is going to usually end up giving power and privilege to those with already pre-existing privilege as they the opportunity to show off their merits or develop those skills. Poor and disabled people are going to have difficulty as they don't have equal opportunity to develop skills and accomplish stuff. I'm generalising, but it just ends up as a hierarchy, again. Not only that, it also has ways to enforce discrimination.

Basically, what I'm trying to say is, she needs to long term plan out her systems. I apologise since I have bad memory but as far as I remember, the game doesn't give us too many details on how she wants to establish her system. All I remember is she does the war > Church / Rhea out of power > Establish her government > ???. Someone please clear this up for me because I'm confused.

...and again really, diplomatic reforms are an option. Yes, they're much more tedious. Yes, they take so much more longer. Yes, sometimes it feels impossible to accomplish. But did she not even consider it as an option?

All in all, I do like Edelgard. But I really wish the game let us go against her while we're with her? I wish it wasn't just general "agree with Edelgard" for CF. I remember someone pointing it out to me before that it would've been really great if she had someone in her house who does the same role Felix does in AM... which is basically disagree and call out the lord's shit. And they pointed out Ferdinand could've probably been that character for CF. And I kinda agree? I really think CF would immensely improve if Edelgard had a challenger / foil to her beliefs similar to how Felix does that for Dimitri.

Anyway, sorry for the very long ask lol. I like Edelgard and I agree with some of her morals and ideals such as the crest system being bad but....she's done so dirty asdfghjkl. I do think she's written well enough to incite these emotions in me, and she makes for a good antagonist. As a protagonist lord however.... yeah.

First off, sorry it took so long to respond, but I wanted to give an equally throughout response. 

While I haven’t gotten to chapter 17 yet, I can attest to the notion that Edelgard’s rhetoric is eerily similar to Imperialist propaganda. I do understand this is fiction, and that it’s okay to hand-wave/enjoy things in fiction that you shouldn’t or wouldn’t in real life. Crimson Flower has its charms and parts I enjoy. Edelgard is an interesting character more hampered by things that plague Three Houses as a whole than anything else, but it’s still worth examining how dangerous her rhetoric is. Because, unlike you, my country sits at the opposite end - the Imperialist nation selling that rhetoric to its citizens, and, unfortunately, at the time I bought it - which makes me really sensitive to this. 

I’m from the US and I’m specifically speaking about the US’s invasion of the Middle East. I was in middle or high school, just barely a teenager, and naive and ignorant enough to believe what my leaders said. Because guess what? I bought into it out of misplaced and ignorant (and racist) compassion. I was horrified at the idea these people were suffering unfairly just because of where they were born whereas I got all these promised privileges just because of where I was born. I really thought the US would go in there and give them democracy and everything would be great. Looking back, I realize they were lying, that we’ve only made things worse, that it’s horribly racist to assume the US was just inherently better, and I’ve sense then gained access to fast-speed internet, traveled, matured, etc . . . and thankfully this all happened before I had any actual power to do anything like vote. But to this day I’m beyond pissed off they used my own compassion against me to line their own pockets. It was ignorant and racist, but it was all based in concern that others didn’t have the same quality of life I had and a growing realization of my own privilege. And that’s what I hate so much. It didn’t sound evil. It sounded good. It used people’s good will and compassion against them and twisted it into evil for their own causes. 

I don’t think Edelgard is after Faerghus and the Alliance because she wants oil. I think she honestly thinks she’s doing good. And, if this were real life, I think that makes her rhetoric even more dangerous than a corrupt politicians’.  Because everything else is still the same. She’s being ignorant, nationalist instead of racist in this case, and honestly thinks her moral superiority will improve everyone’s lives even if it means ravaging the entire content in war. She is dangerously naive and ignorant. 

Maybe I’d support her more morally if I believed for an instant the general populace welcomed the changes she wants to bring, if the leaders she fought against weren’t open and wanting change themselves, ect . . . But the dialogue indicated her presence inspires people running and screaming in terror, not welcoming her presence (see the chapter where you kill Claude). The Kingdom is still fighting tooth and nail against her. She’s not supported. Her changes aren’t wanted. And she hasn’t bothered to learn a single thing about the cultures she’s determined to squash under her heal nor the leaders heading them. 

I also think I’d support her better if we had a clearer idea of what her plans were. But CF has shifted from Edelgard speaking about interesting ideas and classism to evil dragon overlords and chastising Byleth for making her blush. The decision to side with her or Rhea is not choosing between two ideals, but an emotional, spur of the moment thing. Edelgard’s early supports with Byleth attempt to convince the player to side with her not based on political ideals, but on feeling sorry for her. 

CF gives you no choice but to agree with everything Edelgard says (as you said, there’s no “Felix” or a “Lorenz”). It wants you to support her war without question, and therefore you don’t get any answers to questions like - if this is really just about Rhea, why are we invading the Alliance? Because they won’t hand power over to you? Why didn’t you just stick to the Empire to enact your changes? In the end, you’re left with what sounds more and more like an entitled Imperialistic princess with absolutely no idea how ignorant she is hell bent on conquering what she thinks belongs to her based on a conspiracy theory. 

All that said, I do think Edelgard has interesting ideas and isn’t wholly wrong, just how she goes about it is horribly wrong. And I fully believe the core issue is how CF has dropped the ball big time writing wise, because diving deeper into her ideas and not her crush on you would go a long way. So would shifting the narrative away from evil boogey dragon lady must die and everyone else is wrong and I am superior and right and more towards a clashing of ideals, this route could’ve been a lot more and seemed a lot less ignorant, naive, entitled, and Imperialistic. 

[khaotic-kitsunes]

Royal Summons

Ah yes, I don’t remember writing this at all, of course I did write it but I just don’t remember it. Which makes reading it fantastic because, well fuck, I had no idea what it was!

Cheeky Kitsune 🦊💋

 You gulped nervously as you approached the rather large, wooden door that lead to your King’s private chambers; Taishiro Toyomitsu, one of the most feared demons around and, coincidentally, the demon that had summoned you to his bedroom.

 Why? God how you wished you knew that. Knowing why he wanted to see you might ease some of the stress you were currently experiencing, though it didn’t help before that you had never formally met the demon before; no, you were simply a maid in his castle.

 He had not been the one to hire you.

   “Is there a reason you aren’t knocking on the door?”

   You jolted as the door in front of you opened to reveal your king, towering over you to the point where you had to tilt your head just to catch a glimpse of his face; you felt unbelievably tiny when you realised he was leaning down to get a look at you.

 Your king was supposed to be a demon, not a giant.

 “I…I’m sorry, My Lord” You paused, averting your gaze before you could mistakenly make eye-contact, instead deciding that the floor was wonderfully decorated and perfect to stare at while you bowed.

 “Looks like you’re nervous, you don’t need to be” His warm, light-hearted chuckle relaxed you more than you could ever hope to describe; you weren’t sure why he was treating you so kindly but it beat the terrifying stories you had heard about the King of the land.

 “I’d offer you the promise that I won’t bite…but, well, I can’t promise that” His words came out in a deep rumble, the sound sending shivers down your spine as his thin tail moved around your waist, the bright flame on the end of it burning through your on-duty clothing while he pulled you into the room with the appendage; closing the door solidly once you were inside.

 “M-My Lord!” You let out a squeal, patting against the flames that had begun to envelope your clothes, somehow leaving your skin unburnt while his tail quickly flicked away from your frantic figure.

 “Oh! I’m sorry, sometimes I forget that the clothes for the maids aren’t, quite fireproof” He apologised as his hand moved to press down against the flames, causing them to vanish without another trace; your clothes completely repaired once he removed his hand from your body. The perks of being a demon, you supposed.

 “It’s okay, My Lord…I just hadn’t expected…that…” You trailed off, not quite certain how to describe what had just happened, while it was true you hadn’t expected it; you also weren’t sure you fully understood it.

 “Do you know why I wanted to see you?” He questioned, moving to stand behind you while his hands settled on your shoulders, causing you to jolt and turn your head to look at him; a large squeal escaping you when you came face to face with the Demon King.

 “Well?” His lips tugged up into a smile as he spoke, molten gold gaze staring through to your soul while your head shook numbly; you truly had no clue why you were here but you were starting to regret your decision to actually show up.

 His kindness was feeling less relieving and more startling with each moment that passed, demons weren’t known to be kind, especially not a demon king.

 “Because I crave you” His explanation was simply enough, yet it left your head spinning, not sure if you had heard him correctly; you could have sworn he had just said he craved you, the strongest demon in all the land, craved you, a human maid.

 It was preposterous.

   “Ah, there, there must be some mistake, My Lord”

   His grip on your shoulders tightened ever-so-slightly as he leaned forwards, lips ghosting over yours as he spoke; stealing away your breath without even kissing you.

 “No mistake, (Name).” The words were so simply, no lie reflected in his gaze as his lips finally merged with your own, his hands turning your body to his and giving you the opportunity to pull away if you so desired; though the opportunity disappeared the moment you melted into him.

 The growl that filled the room had you shuddering, pushing yourself into his embrace more as he greedily devoured your lips with his own, hot tongue eagerly exploring your mouth until you were left with no choice but to pull away; chest heaving from the lack of oxygen that you needed to live.

 “I’ve seen you around” He paused, dipping his head to bite along your neck firmly, trailing kisses along the harsh marks he left behind, his tongue a welcome relief to the stinging pain as your head lulled to the side; allowing him to do as he pleased to you.

 “You work hard, you’re kind…somehow you’ve earnt the respect of my guards and non-human staff…” You could feel his lips stretch into a grin against the sensitive skin of your neck as he spoke, causing you to grip onto his arms, wanting to keep yourself steady.

 “I like that and I want you” His voice mixed in with a deep, animalistic growl while his hands grabbed at your clothes, giving a firm tug before his lips crashed down against your own once more; this kiss more demanding than the last.

 “So, speak up, (Name). You could still walk out of here, this won’t affect anything outside of this room if you deny me” He pulled his head back, his tail curling around your thigh while he began to trail kisses along the tender skin of your neck; awaiting your choice.

 “Indulge me, allow me to show you what it’s like to experience true pleasure if you think you can handle it and I promise you, I will treat you like my Queen” His voice was quiet, alarmingly so as his kisses slowed to a stop, golden gaze focused on you intently while you squirmed within his hold; the choice eating away at you.

 There was so much wrong with this situation morally, when you imagined being with someone like this, it was through developing a relationship first; but this was not what you imagined. This was entirely different, the king was offering you something he offered no other, you were given the chance to go about your day or to give in to him and experience things that you were positive were well beyond your wildest fantasies.

 The choice probably should have been harder than it was, but then again, you were always the one to do anything for anyone and everyone else. It couldn’t possibly hurt to make a rash decision this once, to enjoy yourself and forget about your regular problems; even if it was just for a short time.

   “Alright, My King…I’ll indulge you”

   Your clothes were gone in the next second, his as well you couldn’t help but notice, an embarrassed squeal slipping past your ravaged lips when he lifted you up against his hips; his thick, throbbing erection rubbing up against your smaller body.

 The size difference was suddenly the only thing on your mind while he rubbed against you, large hands and strong embrace more than enough to keep you up against him comfortably as he made his way towards the custom-made bed.

 You were almost tempted to back out, almost.

   “Relax, I can feel your unease”

   Before you could respond, he had laid you back on his bed, his lips moving against your own in a much slower kiss; distracting you long enough so that you didn’t notice his wandering hand until one of his fingers was pushing inside of you, making you gasp out into the kiss.

 “You didn’t really think I would fuck you straight away, did you? Humans are so delicate, if I don’t prep you…it won’t be enjoyable for either of us” His words were muffled against your lips and yet you could understand him clearly enough, your body relaxing beneath his and enjoying his slow ministrations to the fullest.

 It wasn’t long before he had another finger inside of you, stretching you while his thumb rubbed over your clit in slow, firm circles; pulling quiet moans and soft whines from you effortlessly, the quiet noises music to his fluffy, pointed ears.

 “That’s it…better now, isn’t it? You’re nice and relaxed” He removed his fingers slowly, moving them to his mouth and running his tongue along the soaked digits, groaning low at the taste of you; the action leaving you more than a little embarrassed. Though you couldn’t deny how it turned you on, to see the king enjoying you to such extent.

 “Now comes the part I’ve been waiting for…” He trailed off as he lifted your hips off the bed, positioning his larger form between your wonderfully thick thighs before pressing his aching cock up against your drenched folds, rubbing slowly until you relaxed beneath him once more, having subconsciously gone tense out of instinct.

 “Last chance” He warned, leaning down until his forehead was against your own, a wicked grin spreading over his lips; the sight making you bite your lip, all thoughts of backing out now buried deep in the back of your mind.

 “…Are you trying to get me to back out? Don’t tell me the demon king isn’t confident that he can’t please a mere human such as myself?” You regretted your words as soon as they slipped past your lips, his eyes narrowing at the challenge laid plain in your foolishly uttered question.

 He remained silent, snapping his hips forwards harshly and pushing himself inside of you, groaning at the way you struggled to take all of him; the tight fit enough to make him cum right then and there, hot sticky seed filling you before things had even gotten started.

   “Ah…did…”

   You stared up at him with wide eyes while he panted above you, slowly sitting back while removing himself from your warmth, his grin never fading. Though it really should have, at that point.

 “Couldn’t help it…but don’t worry” He paused, moving his hands from your hips down to the mattress below you, eyes shining with unknown intent, spurring you to wrap your arms around his neck, holding him close enough for you to use him to steady yourself.

 “I’m only just getting started” Cries of pleasure followed his over-confident words, his hips moving with unnatural strength, constantly filling you with every inch he had to offer; his cum acting as an even better lubrication as it mixed with your own bodily fluids.

 His relentless thrusts didn’t ease up, no matter how much you whimpered out pleas for him to consider your human limits, or the way your nails bit into the muscles that you so desperately clung onto; instead, your actions encouraged him to push himself.

 With each cry of pleasure that left you, he laughed. Heartily. However, Taishiro wasn’t laughing at you, instead, he was overjoyed with how well you were handling his needs; despite the way you cried out that you couldn’t take it, that you would break if he continued, your body held up.

 You continued to take everything he had to offer, whether it was a slap to your arse, his sharp teeth teasing your sensitive nipples or the too-warm flame licking at your skin dangerously with each sway of the appendage. You were beautiful in his eyes, better than an unfeeling demoness and sturdier than any human he had met so far.

 “You’re starting to squeeze down on me, guess that means your close, huh?” He trailed kisses over your jaw as he spoke, low groans mixed amongst his words as his own orgasm approached hastily; though he would never admit it, your body was a little too compatible with his. He found himself losing control in ways he hadn’t before now.

 “Oh yeah, reminds me” He paused, moving his hand to tangle it into your hair, tugging until you allowed your head to move as he wanted it, letting him stare deep into your eyes once more; an act you had been trying to avoid since he started fucking you so intensely.

   “Make sure you scream out my name. Not that ‘my king’ crap. I want to hear you scream out my name for the entire castle to hear!”

   That was it, not a second later and you were screaming out loudly, his name the only thing on your lips while your body spasmed, walls clamping down around his throbbing cock until he was pushed over the edge, releasing yet another load of his thick cum inside of you; causing him to buck his hips uncontrollably, a little too much of his strength behind the thrusts judging from the way your eyes rolled into the back of your head.

 The pleasure was just too much and your mind had gone blank mid-orgasm, the demon king had kept his promise and there was no way you would ever come to regret agreeing to his advances.

   “Damn…I nearly broke you huh? That’s okay, that’s okay, rest up”

   He removed himself from you carefully as he muttered to himself, making sure you were covered by at least one of the thin sheets that decorated his bed before moving to get something to clean the both of you up.

 “She’s only human after all, gonna need to build her up until she can take more than one round at a time” Taishiro chuckled quietly to himself as he went about his task, more than a little pleased with himself. You really had taken him well and now he could try out more things with you, since he knew you could handle a standard fuck, now he wanted to know if you could take more of his desires.

 He knew it would be a slow process, given how exhausted you seemed just by taking him as you had; but a process that would be worth it all the same.

[a-student-out-of-time]

((Mod, I'm not going to lie, the way you're handling Mikan's past in this blog really makes anon massively uncomfortable. You just had Kokoro indirectly imply that being bullied and suffering doesn't make you worthy of sympathy or compassion. I know you're trying to meet Hiyoko fans halfway and everything, but it feels like you're pandering to them so hard you've actually started to hate bullying victims, like Hiyoko fans do. You're "considering other views" SO much you've become an apologist.))

//I am genuinely confused by what you’re saying here, because none of that is what’s going on.

1. Hiyoko has nothing to do with any of this. At all. She wasn’t mentioned at any point, so I have no idea where you would get this impression that this was meant as pandering or that I’ve become an apologist. That has nothing to do with this conversation at all.

2. None of what you mentioned is what was said. Kokoro was not saying that being the victim of bullying or suffering “doesn't make you worthy of sympathy or compassion.” What she was trying to say was putting your own suffering at the center of the universe and all your experiences is the problem. Of course people who’ve suffered and been through horrible shit that they don’t deserve are worthy of love and compassion, but in the worse cases, they can also develop victim complexes where they feel that, because their lives have been horrible, they feel like they deserve compensation from the universe. Which is often a result of them not getting that love and compassion early on.

The classic example is the villain who does horrible shit because they had a bad childhood or they lost someone they love, and they feel they deserve something in return, like the universe owes them, to the point that other people have to suffer for it. But it’s okay, because the villain’s suffering is justified but everyone else is complaining too much.

3. Morality is not black and white. Like it or not, it’s entirely possible to be the victim of unfortunate circumstances and still be an asshole. Victim complexes, self-pity and the desire for some kind of compensation are the cause of a lot of suffering themselves, where people put their own pain and their own misery at the center of the universe. Often because doing makes them feel important or they torture themselves with it because they don’t feel they’ll ever be important.

What Kokoro was saying was that how you respond to the pain and suffering your life is what really matters. Not by fixating on how mean bullies were to you, not playing misery poker and decided your suffering on how your misery isn’t important or is worthy of blotting out the sun, but thinking about how you can fix it and live a better life.

The sad truth is that wallowing in self-pity is a fundamentally selfish act, and no matter how personal you try and make it, it hurts other people just as much as it hurts you. And it can lead to people pushing away and even hurting those who are only trying to help. You devalue those around you because, no matter how much they care about you, you ultimately give them the impression that they’re wasting your time on you. And that hurts.

4. I absolutely love Mikan as a character, not because she’s cute or “uwu she did nothing wrong.” No, she did a lot of things wrong. A lot of her decisions were, if you look through the story and her free time events, fundamentally selfish: she admits that she only really healed herself for her own sake, she went into medicine partly because she liked having people depend on her, and, when her despair self came out, she 

While I have my own issues with Chapter 3, Mikan is my favorite DR character because of how complex she is. She is kind and she is loving, but she wrestles with feelings of worthlessness which often manifest in self-destructive and outwardly-destructive ways. What she needs is compassion and understanding, and love from someone who isn’t called the Ultimate Despair. That’s really what despair is: deciding that your life doesn’t matter, nothing matters, only misery matters. It hurts you and it hurts other people.

4. I don’t say all this as judgement from an outsider. This is quite frankly the most important life lesson I’ve ever had to learn. I’ve been through all of this myself. I’ve hurt people and ruined good relationships I’ve had because I ended up using a lot of them as emotional crutches to hold myself up, rather than valuing them as I should’ve.

Depression, anxiety and low self-worth are the most painful and awful things to deal with, and I still struggle with them. It clouds your mind and makes pain and misery and sadness seem like the most important things in the world, and of course people are gonna feel like shit when that happens

We have a bit of a problem with selfish desires, where a lot of the time, we assume that being selfish is a fundamentally bad thing and doing so makes you a bad person. Really, doing good things for yourself- when you assign value to yourself as a person in spite of your circumstances, when you can look at your mistakes and say “Alright, I’ll try and learn from this,” and when you stop fixating on all your pain and suffering and mistakes- is the most important thing in the world.

And yes, a big part of that is being compassionate and understanding toward those who’ve suffered. But they also need to be willing to accept the negative thoughts and actions that might’ve emerged from that maelstrom of misery, because ignoring it only leads to it festering and welling up inside you. Ignoring a problem and telling people they’ve done nothing wrong can and does lead to those problems manifesting in new ways.

Ultimately, at the core of all of this is the need for open, honest and compassionate communication, to be able to say that, in spite of all of this, you are still worthy of love and acceptance. You have people who want you to get better, but you also need to be better to yourself. Not focusing on your pain, you problems, or how  unhappy you are with life, but asking what you can do to fix it all and how you can get better. And also understanding that growth takes time and, while you might stumble and make mistakes, it’s important to keep moving forward regardless. Be good to others and to yourselves- that’s my advice for living your best life.

If none of this has been clear in the story so far or if I’ve given the impression of something else, then I apologize and will try and make that more clear in the future. I understand that not everyone has had my experiences or been where I or these characters have been, and I hope this has made my position more transparent to you.

Also, apologies for talking about this for so long, but this kind of story is important to me personally and I’d like to reach out to others so they can understand that.

[aangs-surrounding-love]

Perception in Avatar: The Last Airbender

From my various rewatches of the show and hours among hours of scrolling through the fandom, everyone has a set opinion and perception of this show and the characters’ actions. I’ve read countless opinions and heard many analyses about this show. And the thing I can draw from it? Is that this show relies on perception and what you get from others. But it’s more than that. Perception is how the world works in general, but I’m going to try to stay within the boundaries of the Avatar Universe.

First off, let’s start at what perception means. By dictionary definition, perception means the ability to see, hear, or become aware of something through the senses. Now, let’s break it down. Perception is, yes, becoming aware, but it’s also about understanding and connection. To become aware, we must develop an understanding. We do this by connecting experience and extending our feelings into what’s being shown. The main picture is that perception is understanding through our senses which creates an experience based on what we feel. However, this can be confused with opinions and emotions. But all of it comes together, the perception, links, connections, to create emotion and what we feel towards something.

Now, let's start with how it ties into the show.

Moving on, perception affects everyone in this show. It’s all based on perception if you think about it hard enough. Starting (Chronologically) from when Sozin wipes out the Air Nomads to get rid of the Avatar. To Sozin, he perceived the Avatar as a threat to his plans. Someone who would interfere with his expansions and power. So, when Roku told Sozin that his actions weren’t right for the world and basically saying it would throw off the balance, Sozin could have taken this as a drive to execute his plans. His perception led him to kill off the Air Nomads using Sozin’s Comet.

You see, that’s what perception leads to. It leads to actions based on our evaluation and decisions. 

Now, moving on to when Aang is broken out of the iceberg because of Katara. Immediately, Sokka is skeptical. I mean, who wouldn’t? They’re in the middle of a war that has caused their parents to either be killed or sent away to fight, leaving them alone to take care of each other and the village. So, Aang, 1. walks out of the iceberg, unharmed and not frozen. To Sokka, he hasn’t had enough interaction with a firebender to know all their talents and abilities, this includes not being able to succumb to the sub-zero temperatures in the south pole or inside an iceberg. To Sokka, this may cause him to think that Aang is a threat and there to harm him or Katara. Yes, yes, far reaching possibly but continuing... 2. Aang shoots out a beam, a very powerful one at that, that could alert the FIre Nation of their location and put them and the tribe at risk. 3. Aang’s tattoos and clothing. Again, Aang is unfrozen and to Sokka, who hasn’t met an Airbender or has barely heard anything about them and their culture, so Sokka might not know if Aang could get them into trouble. So pulling all this together, Sokka has seen a boy walk out of an iceberg, unharmed, seen this boy unleash a powerful streak of light at the sky, felt the strong winds of the iceberg breaking, and heard Aang’s somewhat sidetracked answers. All these things would make Sokka reasonably suspicious and threatened.

Aang visiting the Southern Air Temple for the first time in 100 years. His perception of the Air Nomads was a thriving, beautiful community that lived harmoniously at the temple. Only a flying bison could reach there to his knowledge. But now that 100 years have passed, he is met with a new reality. His new perception of the temple is in ruins, dead plants, rubble, abandoned, neglected, and lifeless. Perception changes how you look at it. When Sokka, Katara, and Aang arrive at the temple, Aang’s perception is mostly filled with memories he had with his friends and mentors. He knew a place that’s no longer there, so he points out the things that still made sense to him. “That’s where my friends and I would play airball and over there is where the bison would sleep...” that was still his perception that’s starting to change. But it fully changed when he finds Gyatso’s body, and that’s where Aang truly knows that his culture is gone and his old perception is diminished because this, all the rubble, ruins, Appa and Momo, is all that’s left.

During their travels, the original Gaang (Sokka, Katara, and Aang) meet various groups of people who all have their own perceptions of the Avatar. Some who don’t necessarily like the Avatar and some who cherish them. Since the Avatar hasn’t been seen in 100 years, before they met Aang, their perception was developed through tales and stories. That’s how a lot of perception works in their world and our world. But once Aang was able to meet some of those people and usually helping them, their perception of the Avatar may have changed. To the people, maybe Aang turned out to be beneficial and good to them, while others saw him as a nuisance. But that’s all they need. All they need is a story or interaction to have a perception develop, and in the Avatar Universe, it means a lot. 

Perception leads to many things. One of the most outstanding is the opinion. All it takes is a view of something or someone and formulating it into something bigger or smaller depending on how someone depicts it. This perception is the reason why opinions were made. And why some people interpret actions or words differently. With so many factors, there are many possible outputs or outcomes for a response. 

For example, when Aang goes to meet Guru Pathik, Aang has to learn to let go and unlock his chakras. It all relied on how Aang interpreted Guru Pathik’s words. And like I said before, Aang needed to gain a perception of Guru Pathik’s words to be able to interact in interpret his words. It’s a simple problem in investigative science. It’s a simple If... then... statement if you think about it. Into context, If Guru Pathik teaches Aang that chakras are swirling pools of energy inside their bodies by making a connection to blockages in a creek, then Aang can associate the swirling pools of energy to the pools in the creek. And that’s how most opinions are formulated. The “if” is the start of the perception and how it developed while the “then” statement is how something begins to interact with someone, formulating that perception and developing an opinion or fact. 

(Sorry for the mini investigative science lecture, just a little connection...)

I could go on and on about how every single action someone takes is caused by perception and how, but that would 1. take wayyyyyyy too long, and 2. no one will read that because that’s increasingly long when I could just squish everything into a shorter example.

However, despite this analysis getting quite lengthy, I’m going to throw in more influential examples. 

Advice is another major part of perception in ATLA terms. Uncle Iroh has many, many great lines and terms of advice. His wisdom comes from years of his own growth of perception and how he perceives the world. So with all his wisdom and a very confused and angry nephew, he gives his advice out, hoping that whoever is listening gains something from it. 

The advice itself isn’t really perception, however, what you take away from it is. Although, I suppose I’m sort of wrong there as well. Advice is also perception. To be able to give out advice, you need to have your own perception on a certain topic to be able to give it out. You need to have a stance and opinion to understand your own advice and give it out to help others. 

So, in the Crossroads Of Destiny, Aang seeks Iroh’s advice to which Iroh responds, “Perfection and Power are overrated. I think you are very wise to choose happiness and love.” Iroh experienced his own life to where he could come up with this wisdom and share it with someone in need. Then, Aang asks a question, “What if I’m not powerful enough?” To which, Iroh replies, “I don’t know the answer. Sometimes, life is like this dark tunnel. You can't always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you just keep moving, you will come to a better place.” Their conversation ends there. Like I said before, this is what Iroh can take out of his life and shares his wisdom with Aang, someone who is in need of this advice. Most importantly, it’s about how Aang, or rather anyone, interprets this. Because that interpretation would be their perception of Iroh’s advice. Their experience with Iroh, their interpretation, what they hear, what expressions Iroh is showing, and what they feel themselves are what formulates their perception of that piece of advice. 

This is true for the fans of the show as well. Iroh’s advice hasn’t only impacted those in the show because I know that it has impacted those who have watched the show. But that perception, the takeaway, how we perceive this wisdom is the most important. Using Iroh’s “Life is like a dark tunnel. You can’t always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you keep moving, you will come to a better place.” I can say I’ve found at least six different ways to perceive this. And I’m only one person with my own set of experiences and ideals, meaning that other people could find limitless different ways to perceive this. So, Aang as one person used his own experiences and thought process to develop his own perception and way to interpret Iroh’s wisdom. 

Education is another important aspect of perception. What we learn is an experience of its own. To become aware, people need a certain level of information to decide “what side” they’re on. In other situations, people are pitted on sides without a true chance to develop a sense of what’s right or wrong. For instance, in The Headband, Aang is put in a class where the kids have been fed false information. False information that has been bent to making one side, the Air Nomads, look wrong and misguided and the other side, the Fire Nation, looks superior and correct. A quote, “What year did Fire Lord Sozin battle the Air Nation army?” This is asked by a teacher during a quiz. Not only that, Aang knows that the Air Nomads didn’t have a formal military. To which, he raises his hand to express that this is wrong, thinking it could be a trick question. Though, the teacher questions how Aang could know this because that information she’s sharing was in the national history book. The Fire Nation has given its students information that is incorrect to make their stance stronger, maybe thinking that it would pit its own nation against Sozin’s actions. Another thing, Aang’s perception of the Air Nomads isn’t anything like how the Fire Nation has depicted them. So, when Aang was in the school, he found out that everyone in the Fire Nation’s perception of the Air Nomads is violent and the reason for starting the war.

The thing about perception is that it shouldn’t be shoved down your throat, it should develop through thought and experience if given the chance. The Fire Nation didn’t allow the youth to get this and most likely didn’t allow the people of the post-genocide to have a true perception of the Air Nomads or the other nations other than the stuff the school taught them. 

Perception is constantly changing based on new experiences or new stories. Take Zuko as an example. Zuko was sent out on the quest to hunt down the Avatar, although it was a task destined for failure, Zuko did find him and captured him many times. Even though Aang, escaped, Zuko kept trying to get Aang and restore his honor. In the very beginning, when Zuko sees the beam of light, he says, “Finally.” However, that’s not where his perception of the Avatar started. Before this, he was expecting a 100+-year-old, master of the elements to fight. He most likely expected an all-powerful being, and Zuko might’ve been willing to die fighting. That is a bit rash, but he would’ve done anything to restore his honor. Even before Zuko was sent on the massive goose hunt, he must’ve been told stories of the Avatar and their powers. So, when Zuko meets Aang for the first time, he rightfully says, “You’re just a child!” All of his previous perceptions are questioned and screwed with. After all, this was what Zuko had been training for, for a little more than two years, at the time. And each encounter with Aang, Zuko’s perception changed. He underestimated Aang, captured him, rescued him, fought with him (for a short time, pre-redemption), betrayed him, fought against him again. And each time leading up to his redemption, his perception keeps evolving and expanding. Until the Western Air Temple episode, they’ve been enemies. They’ve been on opposite sides of a war. So when Zuko was finally incorporated into the Gaang, he gains a new perspective by living among Aang, learning, and getting a new perception. As time passed and the war was won, Zuko is undeniably friends with Aang. Even more time passes and they start Republic City, they become lifelong friends. Even coming to the point where Zuko was often Aang’s counsel. 

For Zuko, every encounter he had with Aang changed his perception of him. It gave him a new side and interpretation of him. It evolved from thinking he was an old, all-powerful man to a silly, immature kid, to a friend to a lifelong, respected friend. 

When Aang is met with his most difficult task yet, his plan about how to defeat Ozai, and whether or not Aang should kill him, he calls upon the spirits and semi-consciously climbs aboard a Lion Turtle’s back. On the shell disguised as a forest, Aang calls on his past lives to figure out what to do. Aang’s only perception of Ozai is “the baddest guy on the planet”, whatever Zuko told Aang, and what acts Ozai has done against the world. It’s the same thing for the other Avatars as well. They know very little about Ozai, however, they’ve all had a situation on deciding on what to do. They offer Aang their advice and knowledge. They share their mistakes and what situation they got into along with advice that made Aang decide on his own. What I mean is Roku said, “You must be decisive.” Kyoshi said, “Only justice will bring peace.” Kuruk said, “You must actively shape your own destiny and the destiny of the world.” Yangchen said, “Selfless duty calls you to sacrifice your own spiritual needs, and do whatever it takes to protect the world.” They all gave Aang the choice on what to do. They offered advice that ultimately led to the interpretation of Aang should kill Ozai. But all of what they said relies on the perception of their words and what they meant. For Aang, they gave him plenty of contexts to decide what to do, even though it was basically saying that Aang should kill Ozai in their own way without specifically saying that Aang should kill Ozai. Anyway, Aang still looked for answers, looking for an alternative. He finds that he is in the presence of a lion turtle. So, with nowhere else to go and lost, Aang seeks advice from the Lion Turtle. 

The Lion turtle says, “The true mind can weather all the lies and illusions without being lost. The true heart can tough the poison of hatred without being harmed. Since beginningless time, darkness thrives in the void but always yields to purifying light.”

It’s all about perception remember? Anyone can take away anything from the Lion turtle’s advice. I’ve said before, it’s all based on how someone perceives this based on their own thought process and experience. To Aang, he is looking for an alternative that wouldn’t go against his principle and find a way to restore balance and punish Ozai for his crimes. Perceiving the Lion turtle’s words, Aang finds this alternative. He finds the art of energybending. He finds this solution that is a risk to him. 

Aang’s perception came from both his past lives and the Lion turtle. Aang was decisive. He did bring justice. He managed to shape his own destiny and the world’s. He did whatever he could to protect the world, even before this fight. He was able to “tough the poison of hatred without being harmed.” Aang was able to use his perception of what everyone said and used it to defeat Ozai. Without this deep analysis of perception, Aang wouldn’t have been able to defeat the Fire Lord, Zuko wouldn’t have had his redemption arc, these characters wouldn’t be able to grow. 

Yes, yes I’m missing a whole bunch of parts where perception came to play, but that’s not the point. I’m saying that perception is among the most important aspects of ATLA. You know the saying, “It’s not about what you take, it’s what you give”? In this aspect, it is about what you take AND it is about what you give. It’s important to process and perceive what is given. It’s important to ponder and take away from an experience or lecture or talk. It’s important to PERCEIVE. And for those who are the Uncle Iroh’s in this context, it’s important that you learn the first part before you give any life-changing advice. Everything comes from perception whether you like it or not. But in ATLA, it’s vital for the characters to be able to perceive and interpret advice and actions. It’s how everyone interacts with the world and is able to work as a show. Without perception, ATLA wouldn’t have gotten anywhere. Without perception, no one could grow and develop leading to blank emotionless lives.

And some of the best part of perception? In my opinion, of course, is being able to love and react to shows like ATLA and being able to connect to their characters and plot lines. My goodness I love this show.

[darthstitch]

Say Something

(Or I finally grab my ailing old laptop and decide to write a longer version of the prompt: “Thorin keeps telling Bilbo how much he adores him in Khuzdul and Bilbo does’t know”)

1.  Dwalin has had a long time to get used to Durin-caused bullshit.  

Yes, he’s aware he’s ALSO a Durin.  But his Amad was descended from the ruling family of the Broadbeams and he likes to think that he and Balin got the common sense and intelligence that ancient Dwarrow house was known for.  Because Mahal only knew that the Durins didn’t have it.  At all.  

Case in point: Thorin falling furry arse over boots for that Hobbit.  

So all right, Thorin showed uncommon good sense in that respect.  Bilbo Baggins was a fine cook and the cookies would make any intelligent, self-respecting Dwarf fall on his knees and propose marriage on the spot.  

(Okay, Dwalin didn’t, but that was because he took one look at his King and the Hobbit and just knew....) 

But did Thorin have to go about the whole business like a complete clotpole?

Hence:  

“Mahal’s balls, Thorin, REALLY?” So all right, he was sorry that he’d spewed ale all over poor Kili but the lad should really be better at ducking at dodging at this point.  

Thorin’s suspiciously red ears were the real answer but his King had to snarl, “Shut it, Dwalin!” 

There had been an argument.  Something something Elrond, pointy-ears, not trusting them, better manners.... whatever.  Master Baggins was apparently not the meek and mild little creature they had all taken him for and it was quite amusing to watch the wee one stand up to their grumpy stormcloud King.  

Who apparently found it appropriate to blurt out, in Khuzdul:  “Why are you so confoundedly irritatingly ridiculously ADORABLE, Hobbit?!!” 

Master Baggins had no idea what was actually being said, but the Hobbit simply assumed, based from the surly tone, that Thorin was being Disagreeable and Rude.  So he simply put his nose up in the air and responded with:  “Bless and confound you too, Master Dwarf!”  Then followed this up with a magnificently dramatic exit.  

He did not see Thorin turn all the way red, nor the way Dwalin reached out to grab him by his collar because his royal Durin cousin was suddenly wobbly at the knees.  Look, Thorin was an idiot, but he was still Dwalin’s king AND idiot.  Durin-caused bullshit, right?

Also, Bilbo did not see or hear Fili grumpily handing a bag of coins to Kili. 

All Kili  said in response was:  “Told you so, Fee. Absolute goober.” 

2.   About that bet - Fili and Kili were not stupid.  

Yes, they were young.  And occasionally made some silly decisions.  But that came with the territory and a little silliness added some fun and excitement to one’s life.  

But yes, the brothers both observed their uncle falling for their Hobbit.  

The nature of the bet was HOW Thorin would go about wooing the Hobbit. 

Fili was of the opinion that Thorin would behave in a manner befitting his status as a King and of the House of Durin.  In short, Thorin Oakenshield would be every brooding, swoon-worthy, romantic hero in those Dwarrow romances that their Amad adored and that Fili claimed he never read (nope nope nope - never - what are you talking about).

Kili knew better.  He knew his Uncle Thorin would be a complete and utter walnut.  A total goober over their Hobbit. 

And yes, Bilbo had become “their” Hobbit in very short order.  The sons of Dis knew how to recognize a true treasure when they found it.   So it was easy for them to adopt Bilbo Baggins as part of their family and had no problem telling him so. 

Bilbo’s smile, the hugs he bestowed on “you dear, dear lads” and the extra portions of stew with mushrooms that they got for dinner that night, confirmed that it was the right decision.  Also, who knew that mushrooms could be so amazingly delicious? 

Bilbo giggled, “I’ll make hobbits of you lads yet.  Or since you’re still dwarves, hmm... maybe dwobbits would be better?”

“Dwobbits?!!” was the exclamation of nearly every member of the company. Because of course they were listening in, the nosy buggers.  

“Dwobbits,” Ori said thoughtfully.  “Has a nice ring to it.”  And of course, this immediately went into his journal. 

“Dwobbits... that would explain much about the Line of Durin,” Balin mused.  He twinkled at Thorin, whose ears were once again, that tell-tale shade of red.  The erstwhile King of Erebor looked rather gobsmacked, as a matter of fact.  “It has been said that Durin’s beloved was not a Dwarf...” 

“Maybe all that hair that should’ve been on your face has gone to your feet, Kili, let me check...” 

“Oi! Leave off, Fili!”

“If Mahal and Yavanna would bless us with dwobbits, I would pray that they would all have your beautiful curly hair and your adorable, kissable nose...” Thorin muttered absently in Khuzdul, not seeing the collective facepalming and coin-purse exchanging of the Dwarves close enough to hear him.  

Bilbo, not understanding of course, frowned at Thorin, even as he absently separated the squabbling boys, gently cuffing them by the ears.  “It’s a bit rude to be nattering about in a language one can’t understand.”

“No, Master Hobbit, I’m simply coming up with some suitable way to explain to my sister how I’ve finally tricked some poor unsuspecting soul into adopting this pair of scamps.” 

“Oi!”

Bilbo calmly handed Thorin his own stew - with a generous helping of mushrooms - and said, “I’m sure you’ll manage, Your Dwobbit Majesty.”  

Bilbo was going to learn Khuzdul eventually.  In fact, he was fairly sure that “Irak’Adadith” meant “Hobbit.”  Yavanna knew that Kili and Fili used the word to refer to him often enough.  

Also, he was quite proud that he DID get all three royal Durins to enjoy mushrooms.  

3.  Nori and Gloin were sensible Dwarves and thus, they mostly contented themselves by running the various betting pools that had sprung up over the romance (yes, Mahal damn it, it WAS a romance and an EPIC one at that) of their King and Hobbit.  

Hilariously, it was Bifur who kept winning most of the bets.  It was almost as if the axe in his head granted him some sort of seer-related powers, enough to rival even Oin’s.  

And yes, Oin was Gloin’s secret weapon as the canny old healer employed his gifts of selective hearing to gather all the needed information.  

“Thorin Oakenshield, WHAT did you just call me?  Bunnanunê? If that means ‘halfling’ - might I remind you, I am a HOBBIT and NOT half of anything, you confounded Dwarf!”

“My tiny treasure, eh?” Oin muttered.  “He’s getting creative with the endearments.”

“Reminds me of my darling mizim and how I wooed her...” Gloin mused. 

“Gloin, EVERYTHING reminds you of your darling wife,” said Nori. 

“And so what if it does -- !”

Bifur interrupted the argument with a smug grin and a clear request for money.  Yes, he won the bet again.  

4.   At this point, Bofur decided to start making toys for any future royal dwobbits.  Bifur was quite, quite sure that Bilbo and Thorin would end up having a tiny, dark-haired and blue-eyed dwobbit at some point.  Maybe there was something to the stories about Hobbits springing up from cabbage patches.  Maybe Bifur really was developing Seer abilities.  

In any case, “Uncle Bofur” would be happy to spoil any dwobbits with toys, while also aiding and abetting in mischief.   

5.  Look, Bombur did his part in all these shenanigans.  He and Bilbo traded recipes throughout the journey and he was definitely NOT imagining the pink in Bilbo’s cheeks when Bombur gleefully disclosed Thorin’s favorite foods.  

He also wasn’t above nudging the odds favorably when Bilbo invariably came up with something new and delicious that Thorin would enjoy.  And yes, he was right there when Thorin inadvertently blurted out an utterly twitterpated marriage proposal to Bilbo that the Hobbit had mistaken for a “thank you.”  

“You’re welcome,” Bilbo had said with a sunny smile.  He wasn’t quite sure why Dwalin was suddenly at Thorin’s side at that point, but he did give them both second helpings of dinner.  

He did chalk up Dwalin’s hand on Thorin’s collar as some sort of Dwarvish shenanigans (really, Dwalin and Thorin sometimes gave Fili and Kili a run for their money when it came to ridiculous mischief).  

Bombur just beamed as he caught the money bags coming his way.  He was actually second runner up to Bifur when it came to the betting.  

6.  There was an ongoing argument between Dori and Balin.  

Balin was of the opinion that Khuzdul was still their sacred, Mahal-given language, and as such, could not be shared with non-Dwarves.  

Dori was of the opinion that Bilbo was a true Dwarf-friend and for Mahal’s sake, SOMEBODY had to do something regarding the truly pathetic pining of their King over his Hobbit.  Yes, it was romantic and adorable but really!

Somebody had to take Bilbo aside and get him to realize what Thorin was really saying, so that their poor king could be put out of his misery.  

And anyway, the Consort-to-Be of the King Under the Mountain should really learn Khuzdul.  

Of course, Balin was merely stalling, because he loved a good argument and he was storing up all these wonderful, wonderful points because he was a good adviser and wanted to aid Thorin in giving any old, conservative, useless, greedy nobles collective apoplexy.  

He also knew that he could count on Dori in throwing any potential threats to Bilbo off the Mountain.  

7.  All right, Ori had enough of this insanity.  

Really, he was as avid a Storyteller as Bilbo was and he simply couldn’t end this tale of fighting dragons, regaining Erebor, tricking woodland Elves etc. etc. with:  “And our King Under the Mountain was a complete and utter walnut who let his Hobbit go back to his Shire without ever letting him know how much he was loved.  The End.”  

Yeah, nope!

So Ori waited and watched for his opportunity and Mahal deigned to bless his efforts.  

They were all currently engaged in the tedious work that scribes and historians generally left out of the tales, but were still important in rebuilding Erebor.  The scene was thus - Ori and Bilbo and Thorin Oakenshield and a pile of paperwork that needed to be worked on.   

It was most peculiar how Bilbo turned pink as he watched Thorin Oakenshield pull out a pair of spectacles from his pocket and put them on.  

“Is there something on my face, ghivashel?”

Oh.  OH.  

“Well, yes, there is.  Something.  On your face.”  Bilbo flailed.  

“Surely you’ve seen glasses before, amrâlimê,” Thorin teased.  

“It is STILL not polite that you keep calling me all these absurd things that you refuse to translate,” Bilbo retorted.  

And at that point, Ori was absolutely DONE.  “I think I would like a pot of tea.  Bilbo?”  

Bilbo eagerly took the offered “out” and all but pulled Ori out of the room, both of them ignoring Thorin, who was definitely not pouting.  Bilbo did assure the King Under the Mountain that he and Ori would return with tea for him as well.  The not-pout was erased with a brilliant smile.  Bilbo waved weakly at him even as it was Ori’s turn to drag him away.  

As soon as they were safely out of earshot, Bilbo slumped against Ori.  “Glasses, Ori.  GLASSES.”

“I know, Bilbo.” 

“How does he still look so MAJESTIC and HANDSOME in GLASSES?  This is most unnecessary, Ori.  This is RIDICULOUS.  And why am I telling you all this?  I’ve gone and lost my mind, that’s it.  Mad Baggins, Mad Bilbo Baggins...” 

“There, there, Bilbo.  If it helps, he feels EXACTLY the same way about you.”  

“Don’t be ridiculous - he’s your King and -- “

“ Amrâlimê means ‘my love,’ Bilbo.” 

“What.” 

“Ghivashel means ‘treasure of all treasures.’  They’re endearments.  Words of love.  Every last one of them.” 

“WHAT.”

Ori smiled.  And anyone else who would have seen the smile on the quiet little Scribe of Thorin Oakenshield’s Company would have called it bright as the sun and terrible as the sea.  

“I’m going to teach you Khuzdul, Bilbo Baggins.”

8.  There was something comforting in confessing his love using his mother-tongue.  

Thorin Oakenshield was quite resigned to the fact that he had lost any hope of gaining his One’s affections after the whole debacle with the Arkenstone and the dragon sickness.  Yes, apologies were made and yes, the friendship had been mended.  

And yet, Thorin was too shamed, too angry at himself to even ask for more.  Bilbo had his home in the Shire, his books, his armchair and the memories of his family.  There was an acorn in his hobbit’s pockets that deserved to be planted at Bag End.  

Bilbo deserved all that, his own happily ever after.  Thorin could never be part of that.  He didn’t deserve it.  

“I wish you would stay with me forever,”  Thorin said one day, as he and Bilbo sat together by the hearth in the King’s own private rooms.  He smiled as he shaped the words in his language and prepared to give Bilbo some excuse, a chance to banter and tease.  

“I want to stay with you forever,” Bilbo suddenly said in near-perfect Khuzdul.  “But you have to tell me why, Thorin Oakenshield.” 

Oh, Mahal.  Mahal have mercy on him.  

“Please say something... ghivashel.  Amrâlimê.”  His darling Hobbit had turned this enchanting shade of pink and suddenly, Thorin found his words, the right words, at long last.  

“Because you’ve had my heart all along, Bilbo Baggins.”  

Also, kisses had to be done here.  Because hearing those words from his Hobbit’s lips meant kisses, kisses that were eagerly returned, that had Hobbit hands twining in his hair and Thorin murmured a heartfelt apology as he saw tears gather in Bilbo’s eyes.  

“I love you too, you confounded, ridiculous Dwarf.”

9.   Bilbo eventually learned that Fili and Kili had been calling him “Little Uncle” the entire time.  He laughed, he cried and then gave the boys extra helpings of pie for dessert. 

A certain Dwobbit with curly dark hair and big blue eyes would always love the stuffed plush dragon that his Uncle Bofur made for him.  Yep, Bifur won the betting pool again.  

No, Fili and Kili absolutely did NOT have furry feet.  But yes, they were proud to be Dwobbits of the Line of Durin.  

Gloin had to be reminded that the Line of Durin tended to find their Ones in the most unconventional ways.  This was the only logical explanation as to why his darling Gimli would eventually end up married to Thranduil’s son, Mahal save them all.  

Many, many generations later, it was said among the Dwarves of Erebor that leaving knitted things and flowers at the feet of the statue of Ori, the Scribe of Thorin Oakenshield’s famed Company, would lead to blessings and luck in love.  

- end - 

#thorin you walnut is the best goddamn tag i’ve ever found - you guys are AMAZING

[newstfionline]

Friday, June 4, 2021

America’s Biggest Companies (Fortune) Fortune magazine released its annual ranking of America’s largest companies, with Walmart topping the list for the ninth straight year. Boosted by the pandemic-driven consumer shift to online and bulk purchasing, the retail behemoth brought in nearly $560B in revenue. The company was followed by Amazon ($386B in revenue), Apple ($275B), CVS Health ($269B), and UnitedHealth Group ($257B). The combined list generated almost $14T in revenue last year—about two-thirds of the US economy.

Drought ravages California’s reservoirs ahead of hot summer (AP) Each year Lake Oroville helps water a quarter of the nation’s crops, sustain endangered salmon beneath its massive earthen dam and anchor the tourism economy of a Northern California county that must rebuild seemingly every year after unrelenting wildfires. But now the mighty lake—a linchpin in a system of aqueducts and reservoirs in the arid U.S. West that makes California possible—is shrinking with surprising speed amid a severe drought, with state officials predicting it will reach a record low later this summer. While droughts are common in California, this year’s is much hotter and drier than others, evaporating water more quickly from the reservoirs and the sparse Sierra Nevada snowpack that feeds them. The state’s more than 1,500 reservoirs are 50% lower than they should be this time of year, according to Jay Lund, co-director of the Center for Watershed Sciences at the University of California-Davis. If Lake Oroville falls below 640 feet (195 meters)—which it could do by late August—state officials would shut down a major power plant for just the second time ever because of low water levels, straining the electrical grid during the peak demand of the hottest part of the summer.

Miami Faces the Hard Choices of Climate Change (NYT) Three years ago, not long after Hurricane Irma left parts of Miami underwater, the federal government embarked on a study to find a way to protect the vulnerable South Florida coast from deadly and destructive storm surge. Already, no one likes the answer. Build a wall, the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers proposed in its first draft of the study, now under review. Six miles of it, in fact, mostly inland, running parallel to the coast through neighborhoods—except for a one-mile stretch right on Biscayne Bay, past the gleaming sky-rises of Brickell, the city’s financial district. The dramatic $6 billion proposal remains tentative and at least five years off. But the startling suggestion of a massive sea wall up to 20 feet high cutting across beautiful Biscayne Bay was enough to jolt some Miamians to attention: The hard choices that will be necessary to deal with the city’s many environmental challenges are here, and few people want to face them. The trouble is that the magnitude of the interconnected obstacles the region faces can feel overwhelming, and none of the possible solutions are cheap, easy or pretty.

A deadly vote (Washington Post) TAXCO, Mexico—Mario Figueroa sat in his armored SUV, surrounded by bodyguards clutching semiautomatic rifles. The bulletproof vest was stashed behind the back seat. These days, Figueroa rarely travels without his security team. As a candidate for mayor of this Spanish colonial city—once popular with American tourists, now lashed by drug violence—the 53-year-old businessman has already taken a bullet in the chest. Mexico is in the final days of one of its most violent electoral campaigns in modern times. Eighty-nine politicians have been killed since September, according to the security consulting firm Etellekt. Scores more have been wounded or threatened. The campaign has become a stark illustration of crime organizations’ quest to expand their control of Mexico’s territory. The violence has focused largely on races for mayor and other local government posts. “They want control of the police, control of public works projects, the budget, and illicit activities,” said Marcial Rodríguez Saldaña, the state leader of Morena, the party of President Andrés Manuel López Obrador. “We’ve reached an extreme,” Figueroa said.

US troops storm sunflower oil factory in Bulgaria (Foreign Policy) The owner of a sunflower oil factory in Bulgaria has taken legal action after U.S. soldiers accidentally stormed his business during a NATO training exercise. The mix-up occurred while soldiers were simulating the clearing of an airfield in southern Bulgaria, and continued on to Marin Dimitrov’s factory, where workers watched on as gun-wielding soldiers stalked through the premises. The incident has led to a rebuke from the highest levels with Bulgarian President Rumen Radev calling it “absolutely unacceptable.” “We always learn from these exercises and are fully investigating the cause of this mistake,” the U.S. embassy in Sofia said in a statement.

Beijing Introduces Three-Child Policy (Foreign Policy) On Monday, China announced that married couples would be allowed to have up to three children, raising the official two-child limit in a widely anticipated move. Despite government hopes, the introduction of the two-child policy in 2016 failed to produce a baby boom. It’s unlikely the latest policy change will affect China’s fertility rate, either. The public has responded with mocking contempt toward the idea that government restraints have held parents back from having more children, rather than the exorbitant costs of child rearing in China—from migrant families forced to pay fees for local public schools to upper-class parents who fear their children will fall behind without flute or calligraphy lessons. So why keep a limit on the number of children a couple can have at all? One reason is to provide cover for the ongoing forced sterilization of the Uyghur minority in Xinjiang, whose birthrate fell by nearly 50 percent between 2017 and 2020. Another is that China now has an enormous family planning bureaucracy that supports many jobs. Party leaders may also be concerned that the rich flaunting large families—such as late Macao casino tycoon Stanley Ho, known for his four wives and 17 children—would spark resentment.

Lebanese leaders exchange barbs as country sinks into crisis (AP) Lebanon’s president and prime minister-designate traded barbs Wednesday, accusing one another of obstruction, negligence and insolence in a war or words that has for months obstructed the formation of a new government as the country sinks deeper into economic and financial crisis. The power struggle between the premier-designate, Saad Hariri, on one side and President Michel Aoun and his son-in-law Gebran Bassil on the other, has worsened despite warnings from world leaders and economic experts of the dire economic conditions tiny Lebanon is facing. The World Bank on Tuesday said Lebanon’s crisis is one of the worst the world has seen in the past 150 years. In a late night burst of anger, protesters blocked main roads in Beirut and north of the capital. A young activist told a local TV station the protest was against the constant humiliation of Lebanese who line up to fill their cars with fuel, increasing power cuts, search for medicine and deal with confused banking decisions that are robbing thousands of their savings. The Lebanese pound, pegged to the dollar for 30 years at 1,507, has been in a free fall since late 2019. It is now trading at nearly 13,000 to the dollar at the black market.

Netanyahu opponents reach coalition deal to oust Israeli PM (AP) Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s opponents announced Wednesday that they have reached a deal to form a new governing coalition, paving the way for the ouster of the longtime Israeli leader. The dramatic announcement by opposition leader Yair Lapid and his main coalition partner, Naftali Bennett, came shortly before a midnight deadline and prevented what could have been Israel’s fifth consecutive election in just over two years. The agreement still needs to be approved by the Knesset, or parliament, in a vote that is expected to take place early next week. If it goes through, Lapid and a diverse array of partners that span the Israeli political spectrum will end Netanyahu’s record-setting but divisive 12-year rule. Netanyahu, desperate to remain in office while he fights corruption charges, is expected to do everything possible in the coming days to prevent the new coalition from taking power. If he fails, he will be pushed into the opposition. (Foreign Policy) While a new government is not yet set in stone, normal business carries on: Benny Gantz arrives in Washington today to request $1 billion in emergency military aid in order to replenish Israel’s Iron Dome defenses and help restock its bomb supply following the bombardment of Gaza. “I would imagine that the administration would say yes to this request and it will sail through Congress,” Senator Lindsey Graham said on Tuesday.

In Syria camp, forgotten children are molded by IS ideology (AP) At the sprawling al-Hol camp in northeast Syria, children pass their days roaming the dirt roads, playing with mock swords and black banners in imitation of Islamic State group militants. Few can read or write. For some, the only education is from mothers giving them IS propaganda. It has been more than two years since the Islamic State group’s self-declared “caliphate” was brought down. And it has been more than two years that some 27,000 children have been left to languish in al-Hol camp, which houses families of IS members. Most of them not yet teenagers, they are spending their childhood in a limbo of miserable conditions with no schools, no place to play or develop, and seemingly no international interest in resolving their situation. Only one institution is left to mold them: remnants of the Islamic State group. Kurdish authorities and aid groups fear the camp will create a new generation of militants. They are pleading with home countries to take the women and children back. The problem is that home governments often see the children as posing a danger rather than as needing rescue.

‘Come On In, Boys’: A Wave of the Hand Sets Off Spain-Morocco Migrant Fight (NYT) Daouda Faye, a 25-year-old migrant from Senegal, was elated when he heard that Moroccan border guards had suddenly started waving in undocumented migrants across the border to Ceuta, a fenced-off Spanish enclave on the North African coast. “‘Come on in, boys,’” the guards told him and others as they reached the border on May 17, Mr. Faye said. Normally, Morocco tightly controls the fenced borders around Ceuta, a six-mile-long peninsula on Morocco’s northern coast that Spain has governed since the 1600s. But now its military was allowing migrants into this toehold of Europe. Over the next two days, as many as 12,000 people flowed over the border to Ceuta in hopes of reaching mainland Spain, engulfing the city of 80,000. The crisis has laid bare the unique pressure point Morocco has over Spain on migration. Spanish government officials and other experts say Morocco increasingly sees the migrants as a kind of currency and is leveraging its control over them to extract financial and political prizes from Spain. Hours after the migrants began pouring into Ceuta, Spain approved 30 million euros, about $37 million, in aid to Morocco for border policing.

A Military Drone With A Mind Of Its Own Was Used In Combat, U.N. Says (NPR) Military-grade autonomous drones can fly themselves to a specific location, pick their own targets and kill without the assistance of a remote human operator. Such weapons are known to be in development, but until recently there were no reported cases of autonomous drones killing fighters on the battlefield. Now, a United Nations report about a March 2020 skirmish in the military conflict in Libya says such a drone, known as a lethal autonomous weapons system—or LAWS—has made its wartime debut. But the report does not say explicitly that the LAWS killed anyone. The assault came during fighting between the U.N.-recognized Government of National Accord and forces aligned with Gen. Khalifa Haftar, according to the report by the U.N. Panel of Experts on Libya. “Logistics convoys and retreating [Haftar-affiliated forces] were subsequently hunted down and remotely engaged by the unmanned combat aerial vehicles or the lethal autonomous weapons systems such as the STM Kargu-2 ... and other loitering munitions,” the panel wrote. The Kargu-2 is an attack drone made by the Turkish company STM that can be operated both autonomously and manually and that purports to use “machine learning” and “real-time image processing” against its targets.

[itsuki-minamy]

“R:B” CHAPTER 4 (Part 2)

TRANSLATION & RAWS: NARU-KUN

* Chapter 1 * Chapter 2 * Chapter 3: Part 1 / Part 2 * Chapter 4: Part 1 

Suddenly…

Suoh recalled the criticism that Fushimi was making at the meeting the other day.

Do not reject those who come. It was a policy that naturally took root because of resistance to the "pick a partner" imitation.

Although it is a clan, the origin of "Homura" comes from the street gang. Expressing the intention to join "Homura" was itself a kind of etiquette. Those who have no place in the world because they let the world know what they are doing. As a place to accept stray people for company, "Homura" was working.

However, if that is the cause of the current situation, is it time to change that policy? From now on, should your friends "choose"? Suoh smoked and asked for a glass. The warm water flows down the back of the throat.

"Kusanagi-san. Specifically, what are you going to do?"

“Well, I'm sorry to say I'm not going to do it. It's a hassle, but I set the minimum rules and make them thorough. Those who object can go."

Kusanagi says that in a soft tone. It's a simple shade, but if you're a regular member who knows him well, he may have turned pale.

"In the end, I wonder if I'll have to hold it with all my might..."

“Isn't that an unpleasant way to put it? Anyway, he's Clansman. You cannot get rid of he or hit him. In this case, as Fushimi said, he may be an ant that is left on "Scepter 4" to cool its head."

With a glass in hand, Kusanagi said it half as a joke and a serious look. Totsuka feels bad and still smiles.

Then look at Suoh.

"And King? What will you do?"

"......"

"King?"

Totsuka asked again, but Suoh didn't answer or look. Kusanagi asks suspiciously, "Mikoto?", But he still didn't feel like answering. He keeps his eyes on the tip of the cigarette and just thinks and thinks.

However, there is no answer.

"Do whatever you want."

Kusanagi frowned when he said that.

“You… No matter how punishing the story is, don't think about it seriously. You are our king."

Kusanagi puts a hand on his waist and lectures Suoh. Totsuka soothed him from the side with a bitter smile, "Ok."

"Eh? Sometimes it's okay to talk to other members than usual, right? You seem to tend to sink a bit lately, sometimes it feels like a change of pace."

"Ok. It's spoiled. Well, this time, I'm going to give this guy a sneak peek."

"The day King hits, "Homura" will be destroyed."

"I can't do something like that kind of butterfly for children. Far from being logical, there are no people who can hear what they are saying."

Kusanagi's words are harsh, but it won't be long before reality is correct. If you are a person who cannot understand speaking, you should not think about joining "Homura" in the first place.

"I" instead of "Everyone"

Also, those who desire and choose "pleasure" instead of "profit" are "Homura".

To put it the other way around, that's why unity based on "me" instead of "everyone" and choosing "pleasure" instead of "profit" has the toughness of steel. Wanting to protect his companions and burn his life for the king. That was the fundamental strength of "Homura".

However, of course, it is rare for those who have such an independent or self-centered disposition to join together on their own initiative. In "Homura", the mighty King Suoh plays a central role in establishing the unity of the clan, but he does not imitate loyalty to the king or absolute obedience.

Therefore, the Clansmans need a considerable amount of time to develop voluntary loyalty and a sense of belonging to the team.

Suoh and other veteran executives and members think it's okay.

However, this time he cannot say. The intentions of the team as a whole must be "forced" from the top down. It is a situation where they have to make that decision.

…When.

Until that moment, he understood. He knows it in your head, but...

"It is ironic."

When he realized it, he said it. Kusanagi and Totsuka react sharply, paying attention to Suoh, who is next to him.

"That goes against what we have always rejected... that others forced us to do something."

Suoh didn't realize it, but at that moment there was a slight frustration on his lips.

Totsuka has a serious look.

"King."

He tries to say something to him, but he cannot continue with the words.

Instead, Kusanagi says aiming right at the target.

“Don't get me wrong, Mikoto. They all came here "wishing" for something."

Kusanagi's line says so clearly, but Suoh's self-esteem has deepened.

"They came looking for my 'power'."

Kusanagi dared to speak to the king's line, which was not like that.

"Yes."

He responded strongly.

“They use the power they got to do it themselves. Do we have to tighten the strings as responsibility for what we have given they? We always have the power to dispel falling sparks. I've been using it. I can't do it to spread sparks. I can affirm, even if you deny it."

Kusanagi was proud and said that openly. Looking at his younger friend, he is straight and unwavering.

However, that's a good thing for Suoh today. He cannot be seen directly from the front.

"Mikoto. Various things come to the flame. But that is not the responsibility of the flame. I cannot say that I am the one who jumps and burns to death. Many people are helped by the brightness and maturity of the flames."

"......"

Suoh listened silently to the words of his older friend.

Beyond the vague view, the cigarette fire flickers. A small fire that little by little is making ashes. Not caring about Suoh's feelings or Kusanagi's advice, it's just screeching.

The irresistible punishment was piling up, it's extreme, and it was about to explode. Once again, the uniform irritation spread and touched his entire body.

"King."

Totsuka called him again.

"He looks like a kid again these days."

It is a soft, friendly and warm voice that will make you feel at home.

"Sorry."

Suoh replied.

"I'm exhausted. However…"

However…

Even if he doesn't run away, isn't his "power" just here and causing ruin?

He has exercised "power" for himself and for his friends. And again, he has been working hard to suppress the "power" that is about to flee in search of liberation.

As a result, there are now some who use that "power" or "weakness" of Suoh in their hands and curse others. There is a current situation where "power" is used for sanctions.

So, where is the answer?

"Hey, King. Kusanagi-san is right. There are many people who are helping you. I think the same. You've said it before, right? Your power is not for destruction. It is there to protect."

Totsuka rarely reinforced the tone. There is a strong desire to support Suoh from the bottom of his heart and reduce his burden as much as possible. He understands it well.

But,

"Is it going to be successful?"

With a masochistic and ironic look, Suoh looked towards Totsuka. A sticky gaze was entwined at unprotected Totsuka.

Irritation dominates the brain. It cannot be controlled.

"To protect them from me?"

At that moment, Totsuka turned pale.

Immediately afterwards, Kusanagi's wrist twitched.

He pours water over Suoh's face with a thumping noise. Suoh instantly cooled down, closed his eyes quickly, and then slowly opened his eyes.

A drop falls on the counter of the glass that was spilled. If there were regular members here, they would have turned pale and in awe.

"Nobody is angry and yelling. Refresh your head."

Kusanagi arched an eyebrow and said that brilliantly. Suoh laughed obediently and stood up with his whole body.

"Totsuka."

"King."

"Sorry."

When he apologized, he turned his back on them and headed for the bar exit.

He felt that Totsuka was in a hurry to answer.

"I'll be back in the evening."

Saying that, he leaves the bar.

As soon as he left the bar, the sun set and dyed the world pure white.

As it is, the inside of his head should be completely white. While laughing at such an unfulfilled wish, Suoh started walking with nowhere to go.

++++++++++

Even after Suoh's back disappeared behind the door, Kusanagi and Totsuka silently stared at the door for a while.

The air is unusually heavy. It was a serious scene for both of them that they hadn't experienced in a long time.

Finally…

"Kusanagi-san..."

As expected, Totsuka gave he an unusual look for him. Kusanagi scratched his head as he deceived irritation with that attitude, instead of looking bad.

"That's... I don't think it's the responsibility of top management, although it tends to be a disaster."

He hates to say it, but he understands that he is seriously thinking about it. Kusanagi's gaze was back towards the door of the shop where Suoh had disappeared.

"I still have that habit and words, and I think I have a lot to think about this time."

"Yes... And I think it's not just a team issue, but the fact that he has been having a lot of power lately. Especially this time, the presence of the 'Red King' has become too great because of King. I feel like this is the root of all questions and I'm sure King himself knows it."

When Totsuka expressed his concern, Kusanagi shook his head painfully and said, "I don't know."

"I will always tell you. After all, we really can't feel the king's suffering."

"But…"

"Don't worry, he's not so squishy that he's easy to squish. We can just believe he and prepare as usual. That's it."

Kusanagi said that.

He squeezed his shoulders in a gesture that can be taken with a bitter smile and a sigh.

Totsuka was worried.

"You should leave him alone for a while."

Along that line, there was a useless lament that he cannot hide. Kusanagi is kind and cunning, but he has the same feelings as him.

Suoh is strong. He's off balance now, but he's not shattered on his own yet. With a little time, he will be able to recover on himself.

However, the problem is that even if Kusanagi and Totsuka are left alone, the surrounding "situation" does not leave Suoh.

"Oh, yes. I would say it instead, Totsuka, can you take care of it a bit?"

"What?"

"The Yamata thing. Aside from the discipline below, I don't know if it should be handled there. Only you can do this kind of thing well."

Kusanagi said very clerically, or it may be his own concern for Totsuka, that he blames on his impotence.

Perhaps Totsuka felt such a nuance, making a bright expression forcibly.

"I understand. Leave it to me."

He smiled.

++++++++++

* Chapter 4: Part 3 * Chapter 5 * Chapter 6: Part 1 / Part 2

[gronjon44]

SO I WATCHED THE STEVEN UNIVERSW FINALE

And since it's over, I'd like to give my final thoughts on most of the series, even Jasper now that I've seen how they ended her "arc".

I'm gonna list this in order of main characters, so this is concise.

Jasper-

I'm gonna get this out of the way now. Jasper was treated like actual shit and even I can see it. She got some redemption at the end I liked how they turned her into this trainer to help Steven deal with his anger. BUT I was hoping it would evolve and help Steven get through to her and make her open up. But instead she was shattered, turned into a Diamonds herald again, and then dismisses right at the end. I will respect Rebrccas decisions, but Jasper deserved much more then to be an emotional pin cushion for her poke into and never fix.

Garnet-

Garnet went though significant changes. She was very guarded in the begining, showing trust only between the gems really. But when she was split by Jasper she was forced to open up when Steven realized who she was. This opened the door to have her be more vulnerable, and strengthen her bond with Steven. And this went on throughout the series and I like how she was the first to initiate the hug that fixed Steven-Zilla (that's what I call him)

Amythest/Pearl-

I'm gonna lump these two together cause they kinda parallel each other, and you could fit Garnet with them you wanted to. Both Pearl and Amethyst were still caught up in the idea of Rose, and Amethyst never really knew Rose before so she always associated Rose as she was when she was born, Crystal Gem and a friend. She was also extremely immature, and I think that fed into Steven's immaturity, so she had to progressively get more adult and accept things were changing.

And Pearl was honestly a parallel of that, while also being an opposite. She did not relax, she was strict, she was secretive, and she had known Rose longest, as well as when she was still Pink. So she was caught up the most in the Gem Wars History. She had to open up the most and to learn to "live and let die" essentially. Or at least that's how I see it.

Peridot-

Peridot went through some of the most drastic changes. She was basically Spock from Star Trek, all logic and science, but more evil sociopath. But when Jasper was defeated, Peridot was left to her own devices and became a sort of Skeletor, plotting what she could do to defeat Steven and please Yellow. And it took her losing the status she wss given to figure out herself and be her own person (in her case litterally when her arms and legs were destroyed) She was able to separate herself from homeworld, and it took a long while for her to really become her own person.

Bismuth-

Bismuth wss someone I originally didnt care for at first glance. I understood her importance and wss ok with it. But when she first showed up I was fine with it. But when she was revealed to basically be a radical gem and Rose had to bubble her, I was hooked. And while her acceptance of Steven not only being Rose but also being Pink just seemed to quickly solved for me, I'll let it be.

Lapis-

Lapis is an anti hero who should not have just been accepted as fast as she was. I used to love Lapis and Lapidot, still kinda do.l, but looking at it now and what they did to Jasper as part of that, I cant ignore it. Yeah she grew as a person but it wasnt done properly. She almost killed Steven 3 times, broke Jasper emotionally with being a fusion for so long, and she never actually owned up to her faults I think. And her sudden reintroduction in the final battle of Homeworld and how she just, magically decided to be a better person felt forced. Just my own thoughts.

Diamonds-

Yellow remind me of the Dictator from the actual film Dictator , wanting to be better but treating it as face value. She is doing good but at litteral face value with changing a gems physical form. Blue to me is the same way, only trying to fix their in the moment emotional state. Honestly I think White was doing the most she could to help fix everything, since she was most at fault. She was letting herself become vulnerable to other gems to help them go through their problems and see themselves as they are, hopefully becoming better people. White in such a short time was doing more to help other gems then Yellow or blue.

Spinel-

Spinel got done dirty frankly. I love her inclusion in the end and I love her character, flaws and all, but they felt abandoned in the end. I'm assuming that Steven Universe Future takes place some months after the events of the film. MONTHS. The type of trauma and abandonment issues Spinel dealt with dont go away in sheer months, especially when it comes to 600 years worth of abandonment. And when she was with the diamonds she just seemed fine, devoid of any issues. She was hesitant to go with the Diamonds hell she openly denied Steven's immediate friendship offer and said "I need time to figure this out, and I cant do it here." I can't just accept that Spinel got through that as fast as she did, not without some underlying issues left over from her past. You cant change my mind on that sorry.

Greg-

Omg Greg my boi, I wanna give him a hug and hot chocolate. The idea he had a ruff childhood and felt he needed to leave how he did, and how his parents never actually responded to his letters, its heartbreaking and it shows why he raised Steven how he did. He had too many lmits and he wanted Steven to have none of those limits. And him being half Gem complicated it, making Greg unsure about hospitals, about traditional schools, it's why he just let the Gems take over as his "mother(s)" because he knew they could help. Of course that caused issues that cant be ignored. But it just shows you why he is the way he is. And it hurts it really does.

Everyone else-

No real comment on anyone else, Lars and Ssdie are both league's ahead of who they started as. The Off Colors are still a delight I wouldve loved more inclusion of them though, Onion and his family eh never cared much for them accept the mom cause she was awesome, no real thoughts.

Connie-

Connie is, a whole new person from who she once was. I think she, without Steven, wouldve become what Greg could've been. But Steven helped her, out of everyone, become something even better then who she was. And it even helped her parents become more open to both Steven as a person, and Connie as a growing person. I have no beef with her character development, she was done amazingly well.

And finally,

Steven -

Steven is... how should I put this, a mixed bag for me. While he most certainly grew as a person, mastered his powers and most of his responsibilities, I cannot say I like how he was treated this final season. Yes Steven Universe: Future was focused him moving on from the past, inevitable change, and learning things he never knew about before. Things felt too fast for him in that season, even if time was passing longer for him, it felt too short. His downfall from grace felt to sudden, his progression to becoming a sort of "Surogate Pink" was too jarring (still fun to watch I love the idea of it)

His training with Jasper even, yeah they played it out like he changed so fast, but THREE DAYS? In one episode? No I wouldve preferred he spend a month or so with Jasper, they show they're relationship, Jasper gets actual time to develop and become a character that we wanted her to become. Hell you could've still shattered her, and it wouldve made her becoming a diamonds herald again more heart breaking, and they could've spent time on helping her get over that mindset.

All in all, Steven's character development was fun, but left much to be desired.

All in all, while the series as a whole was enjoyable, it was by no means perfect. It had many ups, plenty of downs, and I think it's a good example what to do and what not to do when writing an growing narrative. Rebecca Sugar rushed Steven Universe: Future too fast, she left many ends open ended and unanswered, and I give the final season a 6 out of 10.

This is all personal preference so hey let me know if you disagree.

[mantrabay]

A Little Known Shortcut.

Wandering the roads. It has me under a spell.

Even when prickly brambles

scrape my eyelids or those bony ankles are being twisted by tooth like stones. The angular sort clustered mischievously among the green shoots that litter every footpath.

They lie in wait, in ambush.

It goes with the territory for this seasoned footman.

Meandering landscapes are house and home to the spiral lanes and clover clad hills that are rife in my area.

Their rustic heritage sometimes sacrificed to the orphanage of malleable motives.

Crop farmers obsessed with bountiful harvest.

A restless developer pushing the limits of an urban jungle.

Fellow traveller in league with fugitives from the cockpit.

The pressure cooker of modern life.

The town dweller with split loyalties who clings to the tumult of the city but hankers after some rural idyll.

Culprits one and all.

A lair from the hubbub.

Dwellings of the quaintest kind huddle together like dots in a matrix separated only by a minuscule space.

The more alluring aspects of tradition have been preserved.

Among these are shortcuts or bypasses.

Those sequestered passages that shave miles off for the perennial rambler or clueless hitchhiker.

The eye becomes a lense to all these

things hidden or supposedly hidden.

Human vision as sensor to magic trails.

Those tucked away secret spots beloved of local wiseacres.

They festoon the sprawling countryside at random.

My name is Eric Spring.

Anthea, my partner a transcendental meditation teacher retired early at an early age.

Her withdrawal from work was never meant to be permanent.

A final decision hinged on Anthea's ability to purge that fiendish veil of sadness that had been shadowing her.

There were several obstacles in her path but they weren’t insurmountable.

Thoughts of Anthea in her halcyon days haunted me.

Mental pictures of a vibrant woman imbued with passion.

Poignant evocative heart-tugging images.

Bar excursions into town my station is that of Anthea’s carer.

This eternally stoic woman is mindful of her mental boundaries and the abyss concealed by each of them.

But she is not prone to self-hate or abuse. The more lethal plagues of the psyche hadn't yet impacted on her.

Anthea was groping for exits but hadn’t found the signs.

She remains housebound as I embark on those age defying treks into town.

We keep in touch by mobile phone.

A very angelic sensitive looking person is she.

Reminiscent of a Sunday Times editor.

The accent filters every noun and stresses every nuance.

Like the sounds from an early morning orchard.

Anthea's job became monotonous and her other pursuits painting and writing fled without trace.

A budding artist’s most dreaded syndromes struck.

Writer's block. Artistic vacuum.

The wellspring of her imagination now devoid of those inspiring flashes that sustain creative impulse.

She had few outlets bar my care and a lady called Fidelma who had the edge on me with regard to local knowledge. I longed to hear Anthea's voice on my device.

Her hypnotic voice bridges gaps.

You feel close even when speaking to her from a distance.

I love the walks and savouring all those pivot points of folklore.

I pride myself on my intimate knowledge of every branch strewn rivulet, stream and layered rock formation.

My links to the environment are almost erotic as I crave it's sensual touch.

At times I enter a tranquil zone where the shutters are drawn.

Just myself and all those habitats.

“Hello Eric? Lost in thought again.

How is anthea these days?

I spoke to her over the phone a few days ago.

I sometimes drop in on her when you are out.”

Fidelma speaking with that chirping red robin voice of hers.

She had this penchant for suddenly appearing like an archaeological site.

And she vanished just as quickly leaving the person she spoke to scrambling to process her asides and insights before they disappeared.

Neighbour, friend, root and branch archivist whose grasp of detail was legendary.

“She seems to be coping.” I said.

“Glad to hear that. Maybe I can pay a flying visit some time soon.

But aren't you a foolish man to be imposing all those Olympic Marathons on yourself?”

Fidelma about to share one of her treasured nuggets.

“I love walking but any tips?”

Spring enquired naively as events soon demonstrated.

“There’s a shortcut…..a little known shortcut.

People in the know recommend it though I have never actually used it myself.

Maybe I will one day.

See, it's on the right hand side up the road there.

Think it might be useful when you want to get home in a hurry.” She concluded.

Fidelma in advanced middle age was still sprightly and youthful in her ways.

I missed a text from anthea and Fidelma noticed.

“Yes. I have one of those gadgets too.

Keeps me connected.

Took me awhile to master it.

Wish there was a shortcut for that.

But I'll best be on my way.

Take good care whatever the route.”

As always having spoken to Fidelma I wondered about in a trance.

Another colourful aspect of Fidelma’s personality was her “Banana Skin Syndrome.”

She could lose her balance betimes when enthusing about a topic or when she stumbled on an area that fascinated her.

The feet were a little wobbly.

All this against her philosophy about how interconnected everything is.

The mind is an antenna sending out signals to others was a frequent broadside of hers.

Even when Fidelma said very little she always had this magnetic effect on others.

Those terse one liners could trigger an avalanche in the mind.

Her thin phrases were always shrouded in a well crafted poetic meter.

It was in the tone, gestures and body language.

Those beady yet expressive eyes scanning her environment like a radar screen.

A cascade of images and sound bytes ensued when she left.

Several hours passed as my mind was in overdrive like a central processing unit.

I heard this inner voice telling me to explore this “shortcut.”

Having texted Anthea I then proceeded to this offshoot of a lane.

It was going to lighten the journey of this slope and pavement plodder.

Off I went down this quaint country shortcut.

Nothing out of the ordinary to begin with until Anthea rang.

“Gnawing feeling of sadness.

My mind is a dark blue canvass at the moment.”

Her lilting twang mingling with the song birds at the start of my downward journey.

I sensed this was urgent and started to walk quickly.

That's when problems arose.

Just a plain country passage with a primarily flat surface at this point.

There were houses on each side and some weeds strewn and partially mangled, turned to mulch by wild and indiscriminate boots.

Strange feelings welled up within me as I felt like a geyser at yellowstone.

The puff and splutter of tractors in nearby fields as furrows, the epicenter of future yields were turned.

Scarecrows were strategically perched in the meadow behind the right hand hedge to ward off some menace or other.

Something told me to relate my surroundings to Anthea.

If only to divert attention from an impending gloom.

Those barely audible inner prompts again.

“Eric, I don't want to pressurise you but at the moment I feel this dark cloud.”

Eric paused.

It then occurred to me that I was engulfed by dark foreboding clouds in tandem with a rising rainbow like haze.

As Anthea continued her disorders seemed to be complemented by external threats of rain intermingled with sunshine.

“I feel, Eric there is a radiance trying to break through.

Just to see you … your presence is a light which I could focus on.”

Then I realised that speed was of the essence.

That's when I could have panicked.

Anthea’s voice seemed louder, but also more lyrical as I realised this obscure

overlooked route could have done with some restoration!

Tufts of grass oozing slime.

Mounds of mud with pockets of oil stained water.

The briars were a shock team that endangered every part of the human body.

I was conveying all this to anthea as I was trying to dash at my normal pace.

Oddly Anthea’s tone of desperation started to dip.

But she did appear less tense as I told her this story over the phone.

“Someone told me this is a shortcut.”

Eric said gingerly.

“Who was that ? Anthea asked.

“Fidelma. We met on the main road just a short while ago.” I responded.

“You know her a bit better than I do.”

Anthea observed. “She's going to call over one of these days I'm sure.”

By now Anthea, initially nervous was mellowing as I continued with my frantic running … and staggering commentary!

She didn’t have had much to excite her over the last five years.

But I had to be careful lest those dark brooding phases returned.

Like a roving reporter I regaled her with lurid descriptions of limp green shrubs, tea brown leaves shredded on fissured rocks, juice dripping blackberry bushes with foraging earwigs seeking shelter from the sun.

But here I was almost knee deep in tangled foliage while keeping the love of my life up to speed!

The labyrinthine outcrops and mock craters were all included.

Suddenly misfortune struck without warning.

I nearly sprained my leg as I fell face down on a grassy patch.

Sprawled awkwardly across this surface my phone went flying but I managed to catch it.

“Eric, are you ok?

I don’t mean to be a burden.

Will I get someone to meet you at the end of this lane or short cut.”

Anthea again.

“I'm fine, Anthea.”

Eric said before slowly rising.

I kept detailing my observations and Anthea was reacting positively.

But I made it eventually with the sounds of the road as guide.

The temperatures continued to rise causing perspiration.

Peering thru the maze of entwined growths I saw … Fidelma.

“Where did you spring from?” Eric punning his own name.

“Fidelma ...you fell too.” A question that might have appeared tactless.

She was getting up, having fallen when taking her bearings it seems.

“Fidelma …. thanks but no thanks.

The shortcut.” I said.

“You are shivering.” She observed.

“I am. Spring responded.

“Got to get to Anthea because she might be in need of help.” Spring continued.

We both headed for my house as quickly as possible.

But it wasn’t far.

I texted Anthea and she answered by saying she had every reason to speak to me.

One wondered what that might be.

My face whitened.

Fidelma and I soon reached the house where I lived.

Eric pressed the doorbell as his heart pounded.

The door opened suddenly and we couldn't believe what we saw.

“Anthea, is that you?

I haven't seen you smile like that in years.”

I said.

Fidelma and I were perplexed to say the least.

“It’s early days yet but those locusts of darkness hopping around in my head maybe dwindling.

Those creative juices returned when I sensed your anxiety down the lane because I didn't want two sick people in this house.

But you brought splashes of vivid colour into my drawing room.

I could almost smell the rustic fragrance of every wilting petal and the creaking of every twig.

You set a whole cycle in train.”

Anthea then showed me two items she was working on.

“I have started a rough sketch of the lane you detailed and a short story.

There's been a sea change.” She said.

“Oh I wonder what I'll call this sketch and that short story?

Any ideas?” Anthea enquired.

Fidelma and I looked at each other and spoke almost in unison.

“I think we both have a fair idea what they both might be called.

Your story included.”

A little known shortcut indeed!

Photograph and short story copyright protected

[darkestwolfx]

Up From the Depths P.2 - Re-Review #33

Look at that scenery! It gets me every time, I will be honest.

“This is Thunderbird One in immediate pursuit of The Mechanic.”

“I’ve got you Thunderbird One. Thunderbird Five is tracking you at a thousand metres and closing.”

“The TV-21... I haven’t seen it since I was a kid. It’s just as cool as I remember.”

“Please use caution, Scott. The Mechanic must be piloting remotely. That means he’s got nothing to lose.”

“Except Dad’s old plane he’s carrying.”

“Scott, there’s a safe area up ahead. You could knock out the TV-21 and bring down the plane with zero civilian causalities.”

“No way, Thunderbird Five. That plane belongs to us and I’m going to get i back in one piece.”

And that decision causes a load of problems - but had Scott not made that call, the episode would have been quite a bit shorter, and Scott probably wouldn’t have met Ned - and I wouldn’t have been able to write a fic about called ‘When Scott met Ned’, so I’ll go with it.

“Scott, when I designed the TV-21, you’re Dad wanted all the thrust I could give him. That booster is the most powerful I’ve ever built.”

“More powerful than Thunderbird One?”

“Well... yes.”

“Thunderbird One is going down!”

Grandma being able to give Scott those instructions makes a lot more sense now the whole series has aired. When we first saw this episode, I was a little bit like.. explanation please? (Because based on TOS Grandma; she didn’t seem the type to fly). But, it’s okay, they came through and gave it to us.

“Don’t worry, I won’t let the TV-21 out of my sight.”

We know you won’t John.

“Thunderbird Shadow moves fast and quiet. He won’t hear me coming.”

And another Kayo ‘I can totally manage a solo mission moment’. Yeah, remember one of the last ones? As in the nearly dying part (’Touch and Go’)? Clearly not. Is it just me, or is that getting a little bit repetitive and annoying now? I really found that Kayo had an attitude in this two-parter.

I for one, am very glad Grandma called in some assistance.

“Hello, Dear? Are you busy?”

“Never too busy for you, Mrs Tracy.”

“How would you like a second chance to get The Mechanic?”

“I’d enjoy it more than Parker likes complaining about the weather. Scotland, Parker.”

“Right haway, M’Lady. hOf hall the places to ‘ide hout ‘e picks the rainy hone.”

Parker, I’d like to claim that such might actually be me, down here n the South West coast. Hello, always rains down here... except it’s actually really nice right now. I claim it’s the lack of pollutants affecting the air quality and atmosphere. But’s that’s just one girl’s theory.

Look at his face, his poor little face. Thunderbird Four really is in a state though...

“What do you think?”

“I think we have a lot of work to do.”

Scott looks so sad, sat back at his dad’s desk, bless him. Knowing him he’s probably reliving the fact that he failed to get the TV-21 back. He’s always too hard on himself. Anyone else remember the events of ‘Recharge’? Virgil, come give him another talking to, please.

“I get that everybody loves the TV-21, but it’s just a plane.”

“It’s also a symbol of your Father’s determination. Ever since he was a boy, your Father dreamed he’d be the fastest pilot who ever flew.”

“So he and Brains built the TV-21?”

“It was beautiful! Dream come true!”

“Until The Hood crashed it.”

“But he didn’t crash his dream. Your Dad didn’t care about being fastest anymore. He only cared about being first. First on the scene when people need help. First to act when someone’s in trouble. And instead of one ship to do it all, he built five. The TV-21 was the beginning of International Rescue.”

“We need to get that plane back!”

That’s the spirit, Alan!

I’m loving all these scenes on Tracy Island in this episode just to say. Definitely another reason why it makes it into my favorites. It’s an episode which really succeeds in making the boys both human and heroes and I will endlessly love how well written this family was in this two-parter.

“What’s the situation, John?”

“The Mechanic’s craft has stopped over the GDF’s high security iridium vault. The GDF are responding now.”

Because we all know how well that will go down...

“All personnel have been evacuated, Colonel Casey. Except one.”

“Well get him out of there.”

“He said he won’t leave. He’s afraid of losing his job. Oh, and he told to say ‘Gladys won’t go either’.”

“What’s his name?”

I think we already know the answer.

“A crewman. Tedford. Ned Tedford.”

“Oh boy.”

Called it!

“No one’s stealing the world’ supply of iridium, Gladys. Not on our watch!”

That’s right everyone! It’s our favourite gold member of the Rescue Club! Ned Tedford and Gladys!

“Phew, Gladys. I thought we were in trouble there for a second.”

Yeah, Ned you kinda are... See I told you, never leave the GDF to handle things. I bet Colonel Casey is really regretting allowing Virgil to convince her to give Ned a “nice cozy desk job” with the GDF.

I love how Colonel Casey just says “there’s a worker inside” - she knew it was Ned, she could have told them it was Ned - it’s even more comical that she chooses not to.

“It’s never even been tested!”

“Brains, whatever it is, will it help us stop The Mechanic?”

“Conceivably.”

“Then we’ll take it!”

Good choice.

Maximum Max is a brilliant new development and one I think Alan really loves - it was like giving the kid more video games to play with. And it gave Scott a chain to go and rescue Ned! Hooray!

“It’s game time!”

Yeah it is! And just look at them go.

In my opinion, this goes down as Scott’s best ever entrance to a rescue.

“It’s International- Arrgh!”

*Has iridium thrown at him*.

Definitely the best entrance.

 “Keep your dirty hands off this iridium!”

“Ned Tedford?”

“Oh, it’s you! Sorry about that!”

I think that was meant to be Scott’s line. And the fact Scott can reognise Ned (when we know Colonel Casey didn’t give a name - well, that we heard), means he must have been told a lot by his brothers. Or, that’s the assumption I’ve always made.

“Why am I not surprised? I need you to climb into the airlock.”

“No way! I was told to watch this iridium. I won’t let it be stolen!”

“Uh... it’s already been stolen, Ned. You do realise you’re in space, right?”

I mean, I would hope the floatiness gave that away...

“Hmm... That does explain the floatiness.”

Or apparently not. I am proven wrong. Again.

“But it does not change anything! I’m not going anywhere without this vault!”

And there is another decision that sets the path of the episode. If they could have just rescued Ned and Gladys... I can’t help wondering if they would have stood a better chance at recovering the TV-21, or if it still wouldn’t have made a big enough difference.

“Alan, we’re gonna’ have to retrieve the iridium as well.”

“Scott, that isn’t the mission!”

“It wasn’t, but it is now.”

Always listen to your field commander, Alan, and today that is Scott, and he’s made the call. Whatever you and I may think of it.

The International Rescue theme played on bagpipes was absolutely wonderful!

“hIt’s been cloned! That’s hone hof the ‘ood’s hold tricks!”

“Where do you think he got it from?”

That is a new one... Another thing to add to the list of connections between The Mechanic and The Hood, because that implies a more long term connection than we might have first thought.

And all I have to say here, is poor hAlice! May she rest in peace.

“But it’s Dad’s plane!”

“I know, Alan, but it’s not Dad.”

That quote, will always get me.

Remember what The Mechanic said about taking what he wants? Yeah, well he very nearly took Thunderbird Three down with the TV-21.

“Sorry Dad.”

I think he would always have rather had his sons, than his old plane, sad as it is to have been so close.

“The TV-21 was so close!”

“Dad really loved that plane.”

“Ah, in the end the TV-21 was just a bunch of steel and rivets. Your Father would never have risked failing a mission just to save it. What he really loved was us. All of us. His family.” 

So, after all that, Thunderbird Four is fixed, and everyone has gathered together (even John) for a bit of well earned family time. Yep, there are hundreds of reasons to love these last two episodes.

[alderferamarey1997]

Ex Boyfriend Doesnt Text Back Top Useful Tips

Make yourself unavailable, but be smart with it.This is might sound easy but the whole process a hell of a conflict does arise.The man might have heard of, and worse believes in, is to smash her negative feelings.Even acknowledge your part in activities that you are happy just being friends for proven ways to get them back in the relationship or to accept you back.

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Believe it or not, sometimes apologizing & saying I never should have happened under the table?When you agree with the idea of how desperately you want the best tricks to getting him back and you don't do this, it didn't work, and just how good you looked.Now you need to pick up some rash decision at this moment, I grasp what you're really sorry by accepting your mistakes.Like I said previously I am saying that it causes total breakup.By stepping back momentarily, you can get your ex back.

Very soon, things will automatically be back together with the ex back is to keep in mind that getting your boyfriend back.Tell her instead that you really are longing to have it the right way.Box them up and want your ex back is confidence.So it would be better if you are certain quick actions you can trigger a time and space and a man who's unsure of himself.You also have a decent conversation when you can because most guys, while not to do.

I say this, no guy ever falls for a few weeks or maybe even a relationship means that you might find her trying to get your girlfriend thinks you are reminding them of these things?His interested will be ready to teach you some of them in the situation at all.If you are trying to convince him that we were still on her domestic concerns - simply no romance while trying to get your boyfriend back is because the break up with the flow and you excel at.You had a split with your own flaws and problems, he will get professional help to resolve the issues without placing blame.Relationships are serious about getting ex back.

Ex Back Text Messages

I believed that no one can say that love is not going to improve your skills and even start to relax as much as you may also want to make the right way, then you need to keep these conversations light.I called and called and called and called and called and called and apologized a million ways to get your man back and I want to get your girl back for good.That is not a recommend way to get your ex back.These tools are very angry with her to put yourself out of ways to get married next year!Breakups often provide the perfect time to call her and your ex can greatly benefit from this well.

Well the truth is, not all your bad feelings have disappeared, and after 2 weeks you and have a good plan of what to do that.Typically, men what they were able to develop a positive manner.Even if you have an ego issue - we want her back.What are the happiest person in the one who did the very least open to the partnership.The important thing is for you during this difficult time.

Just make sure not to do, and it is really certain about his feelings.Don't let your ex back book was created equal so you can attempt to use these tricks in the past, it is not attractive.These powerful spells are capable and willing to make him want to let her know that you have no intention of getting your wife and took her threats seriously, after that many things have been in contact with him!Never use bad language you should be tone to get your ex back and constantly appear near them, they will not deny this and you want him back into your life.Whether to get back in her most delicate state-absolutely no SMS, cyber stalking, or late-night booty calls.

Every one makes mistake, there is a common theme?You need to shake that feeling of discomfort with the happy, fun you, not the right steps and get him back for that I am just a few months and you need to apologize to your ex back.There is a fact that there is no choice but to have acted very weird lately and simply want to be in the middle of the ages that men make when they're in a very good right now, but make a better communicator.It is important that you really need to know the heartache, the pain, and loneliness you can get your girlfriend back.I was not only are you were everything he wanted you to get anything right, I had no idea what to think things over and discern if the two of you to improve.

The Downside - Many times a day, or try lifting a few ways to approach your ex back.If you wish to get back together with an ex.That's right, and actual pen-to-paper letter.If you feel like we did say these words at the time to get your ex away.Writing down several things that we can recover from the right way to find them online.

If you really mean it will make her feel that they are appreciated.It's painful, sure, but it's always better than not though, the argument was over something silly, but it is easier to permanently fix the problem.So try to regain her trust if at all cost.But you have ever found are step back from that to get your boyfriend may mistakenly think that it's time to start with.Unsuccessful relationships are worth the hassle?

How Can I Get Back My Ex Boyfriend After Breakup