#yes I’m going to be posting and reblogging nonstop about this for the next few days. Prepare yourselves

[witless-winion1]

GUYS GUYS GUYS

HER EYE

HER EYEEEE

we here? Everyone’s here? Nice okay everyone scream on one two three

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[weasleymalfoypotter]

i hate you (but not really) pt4

draco malfoy x fem!syltherin! potter reader

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

summary: draco malfoy and harry potters twin sister have hated each other since they met. but in 5th year he comes to find that maybe he doesn’t hate her and the reasons he did end up be the things he loves

word count: 2k

warnings: fluff, a little angst, cussing

A/N: i am honestly really proud of this chapter and i’m really excited for the next two. i think there are only gonna be six parts but i really hope you enjoy this one. please like and comment suggestions or criticism and feel free to reblog!! also i have a lot of stuff coming out soon so stay updated and i’ll be posting a master list once i post more fics

it’s safe to say that i am in love with draco malfoy. these last few months have been ethereal. we took our time in getting to know every detail about each other, although it wasn’t necessarily by choice. it was a lot more difficult than we thought it would be to spend time together like a normal couple would do while hiding the relationship from everyone we knew and even those we didn’t. we decided very early on that it would be best to keep it a secret for now. if his family found out about us it wouldn’t end well for him and if my brother and godfather found out... it would end very early for him. it was actually fun keeping it a secret, always sneaking around the castle, learning everyone’s routines to keep away from prying eyes, and hiding away from other prefects and filch. we abused our prefect positions to help with the whole secret relationship which is exactly what we aren’t supposed to do as prefects but it’s justified in my mind.

we’ve been together in secret for 6 months now and i think we’re both tired of not being able to sit next to each other in the great hall, walk and in hand to classes, kiss when everyone was watching, and simply go to hogsmeade together like a normal freaking couple.

we went to my dorm room after dinner on thursday night and made sure no one saw him come in. i didn’t have any roommates , thank merlin, so we didn’t have to worry about that. we cuddle up next to each other just talking about anything and everything until he moved from underneath me to sit up, criss crossed, in the middle of my bed and spoke

“i think it’s time” he was being serious and goofy at the same time which was just adorable but i was stubborn and wouldn’t tell him that. i raised my eyebrows at his statement and questioned him.

“what are you talking about?” i tilted my head to the side, voice calm and unwavering. i knew what he was talking about but i was terrified. i also knew he would be right.

“i’m talking about us, about telling people, if it gets back to my parents i’ll just tell them it’s a silly rumor. the only thing we have to do is tell your brother” his voice trailed off at the end of his statement. telling harry was the terrifying part

“i want to tell people, i really do, but harry is going to be so unbelievably upset, you have no idea. not only have i been lying to him for the past 6 months, i’m also in love with his arch nemesis who he’s hated for the past 5 years. it’s not going to go well” i was talking animatedly with my hands.

“i know but we have to get it over with sooner or later, and it’ll only be worse if it’s later” he’s right. and i hate it. i sighed and laid back on my bed and pulled me next to him. “i know you don’t want to but it really won’t be that bad”

“what were the last words my brother said to you?” he chuckled but didn’t say anything and i knew it’s because it would prove my point. “exactly. he’s going to hate me” he was tracing circles on my arm and he kissed the top of my head

“he’s not going to hate you, trust me, i used to and we saw how well that ended” we both laughed, he always made me laugh when i needed it.

“i would say it ended rather nicely” i said with a smile tilting my face to look at his. he was smiling and i loved it. i took in his features and tried to suppress this moment to memory, trying to take a mental picture of him because he was just perfect. he looked down at me laying on his chest, looking at him with my e/c eyes and i just melted.

“it ended better than nicely in my opinion” he was smiling and it was beautiful. he leaned his head down to kiss me and the only words to describe this moment and every other i’d spent with him was perfect.

-

here it goes. time to tell harry. or not. let’s not. dammit i cant, i promised draco i would do it. harry would usually keep me updated on their common room password so i could hang out with them or study away from the slytherins so i made my way to the portrait hole. i said the password and walked in. sure enough harry, hermione, and ron were at a couch, hermione doing homework while harry and ron talked. upon hearing someone come in they lifted their heads and smiled when they saw me.

“y/n! hey i’ve barely seen you all day where have you been?” harry asked. he hadn’t seen me all day because i was so nervous about telling him that i avoided him like the plague.

“oh you know, classes and prefect stuff has been keeping me really busy lately” i nodded fondling with my hands awkwardly

“tell me about it, i’ve been studying nonstop and i think i might fall over at any given moment.” hermione was exhausted and you could hear it in the way she spoke while she scribbled with her quill.

“you alright y/n? you look flustered” ron showed concern on his face and he was right, i am very flustered, but he gave me a segue.

“listen i actually need to tell you three something” this caught their attention and hermione put her quill down as they lifted their heads up

“what’s up?” harry asked

“okay so you have to promise me to be calm...at least at first, and don’t get mad right away because i’ll explain everything” they all looked so worried but i knew they weren’t expecting what i was going to say.

“y/n what’s going on?” harry questioned.

“promise me. all three of you. you have to promise”

“okay we promise” hermione stated and the boys nodded in agreement. i let out a breath and decided to get it over with

“so... i um..” i sighed “i’m dating someone” their faces lit up at this, harry looked excited but concerned at the same time

“who is it?! why didn’t you tell us you liked someone? when did this happened?” ron questioned before anyone else could get a word out. he was happy for me, you could hear it in his voice, and it warmed my heart but in a few seconds he wouldn’t be so warm.

“okay this is the part where you can’t get mad” they nodded, and harry just wanted to know who was dating his sister. “umm, i- uh... okay. it’s draco malfoy” i said the last part quickly and i bit my bottom lip ready for the world to fall apart. hermione’s eyebrows furrowed and her mouth dropped. ron’s eyes were wide and he was blinking as he started daggers into me with his mouth agape, and harry didn’t skip a beat.

“what the hell do you mean ‘it’s draco malfoy’!” he stood as he spoke and he was trying so hard not to completely yell but he was so confused and on the verge of pure rage.

“i mean that i’m dating draco malfoy” i stated simply. he blinked and the other two stayed silent to let him react.

“NO YOURE NOT!!”

“yes i am, now if you let me explain-“

“THERES NOTHING TO EXPLAIN Y/N!” i looked at him with pleading eyes and he took a deep breath. “okay okay there has to be some rationality to this so explain what the hell is going on. explain to me why you’re ‘dating’ the most foul, evil, and terrible person we know. explain to me how you could do this. explain to me how this is supposed to be okay” he said angrily and quite loudly. i took a deep breath and looked away before meeting his eyes again

“he isn’t foul and evil and terrible actually” i stated calmly.

“HA!! right and voldemort didn’t kill our parents. how long has this been going on?” he was flinging his hands around as he talked. i looked at my feet “y/n... how long has this been going on?”

“six months.” i said quietly, but he heard me. his face dropped

“i’m sorry, what?” he blinked hard “you mean to tell me that you’ve been dating draco fucking malfoy behind my back for six months?! you’ve been lying to me for six months?”

“i didn’t know how to tell you. i knew you wouldn’t understand and we wanted to keep it a secret for a while” ron and hermione were listening intently to everything still in shock

“OF COURSE I WOULDNT FUCKING UNDERSTAND!!” he ran a hand through his hair and took another deep breath “y/n how, why would you ever be with him? how could you trust him? how could you trust anything he says? how could you excuse his behavior?” he had a point...but i had an answer. and one that he couldn’t dispute.

“i know he was horrible for the longest time but he never wanted to be. everything he did in the past was because of his father and he has hated himself for it his whole life, he’s wanted nothing more than to apologize. it’s not an excuse and he knows that, especially with everything he’s said to you” i looked at hermione “but that’s not him.” i spoke with a pleading tone trying to get them to understand that draco isn’t terrible and loathsome.

“and how can you believe all of that? how can you trust what he’s telling you?” i looked at all three of them before i answered

“because he took off his ring” their faces showed even more shock than when i initially told them that i was dating draco malfoy behind their backs for six months.

“he what?!” hermione asked.

“back in september he told me he liked me, i asked all the questions you did. i asked him how i could trust him, so he took off his ring. i saw draco for he really is and not what we all though him to be” i sighed while harry sat down took all of this in. knowing that draco was being honest and that he was actually kind is a shock for most at first. ron was still speechless

“i still just- i don’t know how to...process this” harry said after pulling his face out of his hands

“i know and i don’t expect you to understand and be totally excepting at first but once you get to know him for who he really is, you’ll understand.” ron finally spoke up next

“he really has left everyone alone all year, no bullying, pranks, nothing. i guess that makes sense now.”

“this is so weird” hermione said “i honestly can’t imagine him any other way than how we’ve known him”

“he’s actually the biggest dork ever. he’s sweet, and funny, and...just wonderful” i said. now that everything settled down i felt better. their responses were different because there was no lying when i was in someone’s mindscape. they had to believe what i said i saw in his head. i sat down next to harry and he spoke

“don’t go expecting us to be buddies anytime soon, but if you really say that all of this is true and he really is a good person underneath his... facade, i’ll trust you” i hugged him and hermione and ron joined in

“i love you guys” i said and a chorus of i love you too’s surrounded me. this went better than i expected and i knew draco would be happy that tomorrow we could walk into the great hall hand in and hand for the first time.

TAGS: @idkmanicantenglish @dracoswhore007 @lordlodge

[connordavidscamera]

Little Bear | Connor Brashier

A/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for like months? Idk, I don’t think I really like it, but I wanted to post something.

Summary: Connor has a new name for you.

Warnings: kinda flufy

Word Count: 1.4k 

***

“You should have seen how chubby her cheeks were when she was a baby. She was the cutest thing in the world?”

“And what am I now? Chopped liver?” I scoff, but my mom brushes it off with a wave of her hand. 

“Oh hush. You’re still cute.”

“I think she’s beautiful,” Connor says, taking my hand in his with a lopsided smile.

“Hey, you’re not trying to win me over, bub.” I joke and his face blushes pink.

“Maybe not,” my mom interjects, “but any boy who thinks my daughter is beautiful gets extra brownie points with me.” She smiles and stands up. 

“Where are you going?”

“I’ll be right back.” She assured me.

I fake a gasp, “You mean you’re going to leave me in here? Alone. With a boy?”

Mom just shakes her head. “I trust him to keep his hands to himself. Do you think you can manage?” she teases.

“Mom!” I whine and she leaves the room, laughing that laugh all moms do when they’ve just embarrassed their kids.

Connor smiles softly at me, bumping our shoulders, and I can’t help but roll my eyes at him. “Stop it.”

“Stop what?”

“Looking at me like that.”

“I always look at you like this.”

“No you don’t,” I argue.

He pokes my cheek with a chuckle, “I do, actually. You, my dear, just don’t pay attention.”

I rest my head on his shoulder, “Thank you.”

“For what?” his hand rests on my knee and he presses a gentle kiss to my temple.

“For being so nice to my mom.”

He hums, “It’s easy. She’s sweet. Reminds me a lot of you.”

I shove his shoulder, “Oh, shut up.”

“I mean it. You two are a lot alike.”

“Alright, I’m back,” my mom comes in with two big boxes and a few photo albums. 

“No!” I object. “Mom, take those back to your closet right now.”

“Are these photos of y/n?”

“Most of them. She was a very photogenic baby. Very “look at me, look what I can do” kind of kid.”

Connor looks over at me. “Then why don’t you let me take pictures of you now?”

“Because I don’t like them,” I mumble. “And you’ll see why when you go through these.”

“Oh, so you are gonna let me look through them?”

“Well it’s not exactly my choice, is it?”

He smiles and leans in to kiss my cheek. “Lets see baby y/n then.”

Mom hands Connor one of the photo albums with a bright smile on her face. “That one should have the photo of her in her little bear costume.”

“Little bear?” He asks, opening the book. 

“Oh god.”

“Yeah. For her second halloween we dressed her up as a bear. She loved the costume so much we couldn’t get her out of it for weeks. She’d cry nonstop until we put it back on her.And oh, how she cried for days when we told her we ‘lost’ it.”

“I was two, what do you expect?” I interject when Connor starts laughing and then I turn my attention back to her. “Wait a minute. Why did you do air quotes? Did you not actually lose it?”

Mom sighs, “Well, honey. What did you want us to do? You wanted us to allow you to wear that bear suit until you no longer fit in it? It was hot and bulky and we weren’t about to let you go out in public in that thing.”

“Mom! How dare you!”

“Oh, It’s been like nineteen years. You’re fine.”

“I can’t believe you lied to me.”

“You were two! And you still wouldn’t know had I not just said something.”

Connor’s not paying any attention to us bickering, his eyes are glued to the pages filled with totally unflattering baby pictures of me. One of which catches my eye. I’m sitting in my high chair with food all over my face and the front of my shirt. It’s embarrassing. He keeps turning pages and stops when he gets to one of me when I’m about five and I’m in this Cinderella dress that my aunt got me for my birthday. I lived in that dress. He looks at me with a dopey smile on his face. “You look so happy here,” he says and he’s right. I’m smiling widely - you can see one of my teeth sticking out just a little bit from where it was coming loose. 

“I loved that dress,” I admit.

“We should find you one.”

“A princess dress?” I raise an eyebrow at him.

“Yeah, why not? Let’s find you one that makes you smile like that when you put it on.”

“I don’t think she needs a dress to smile like that, dear.”

“I’m sorry?” he spares my mom a glance. 

“Clearly I’m not the only one who doesn’t pay attention,” I mumble, pulling out my phone from my back pocket. I show him my lock screen which is a selfie we took just yesterday, but I’m not looking at the camera, I’m looking at him. I hold my phone next to the photo, “That smile look familiar?”

His cheeks blush red and he shakes his head. “I am so in love with you,” he says in disbelief and I hear the soft gasp that comes from my mom. 

“Yeah, I’m in love with you too, blue eyes.” I rest my head on his shoulder and kiss the covered skin, pulling my phone back into my pocket. 

He turns the page and there’s that freaking bear costume. “Oh my god! You are the most adorable thing in the world! Look at your little pout! Why were you so sad?”

“That was from the last time she wore it,” Mom said. “We told her we needed to wash it and she threw a fit.”

“Maybe I knew you were lying to me then,” I counter and Mom rolls her eyes. 

“You’re going to be on this forever, aren’t you?”

“Oh yes. I am.”

“Your nose was so red. Nothing’s changed when you cry, huh?”

“Hey,” I hit his arm. “Don’t be mean!”

“I’m not. I promise. It’s cute. Might start calling you little bear when you’re sad.”

I blush, “Don’t you dare.”

“Why not?”

“I think it’s perfect,” Mom said.

“Who’s side are you on?” I challenge.

“Mine,” she answers. “And I think little bear is the perfect pet name for you.”

“Can I have a copy of this picture?” he ask my mom.

“Sure, I think I have one in one of these boxes.”

“Thank you.”

I pout, crossing my arms over my chest while he and my mom continue to look through pictures. It takes a good five minutes for Connor to look back at me, slouching into the couch.

“Oh, why the long face, little bear?” he pinches my cheek and I stick my tongue out at him.

“Stop it,” I whine. 

He leans in and bumps my nose with his, “Stop pouting, love. Makes me sad to see you upset.”

“Then stop making me upset.” 

He chuckles, “Come on, y/n/n. We can get ice cream on the way home if you turn that frown upside down.”

I roll my eyes, damn him for knowing me well enough to know I could never say no to ice cream. “Fine.”

He pokes my cheek, “That doesn’t look like a smile.”

I playfully bite at his finger and he shakes his head. “I said smile, not show me your teeth.”

“I’ll do what I want. Halsey says she’s got nothing to smile about.”

“Ah yes. But you, my dear, are not Halsey. You’re y/n. And y/n always has something to smile about because that’s just who she is.”

Damn him for being right again. I can’t help the slight upturn at the edges of my lips. I lean in and kiss his lips once, quickly. “Okay, you got me. Now can you please stop looking at my baby pictures.”

“I will,” he nods. “On one condition.”

“What?”

“You let me take pictures of you, baby.” 

I glare at him. “You’re insufferable.”

“Is that a yes?”

I nod with an exaggerated sigh, “I guess.”

“You won’t regret it, little bear,” he says into my hair. 

I roll my eyes, the pet name may be derived from one of my most embarrassing moments as a child, but the way it slips off his tongue so effortlessly? I think I might enjoy it more than I thought.

***

I hope you enjoyed! Like, reblog, and leave feedback!!

Tag: @loveat2am @anamariel2301 @shawns-badreputation @bbellbagel @turtoix @ivegotparticulartaste @tomshufflepuff @dino-16-avocado @sleepybesson @lifeoftheparty74 @shawnssongs @luvluvxx @foreveralone19588 @shawnandconnor @5-seconds-of-mendes @emma-manuhpe @nedthegay @shawnsblue @curiouslycryptic @adelaidestreets @vinylmendes

Connor Tag: @shawnm521 @divinginfearlessly @enchantingbrowneyedgirl @bettroff @myyohmyuohmyy @madison-malfoy @shawnieeboyy @mutuallynotmutual @tinycertain @rockstarshawnmendes @lostinmendess @sunrisebrashx @alinaxxshawn @heart-struck @ilsolee @daisyangei

[ineffable-snowman]

Day 22: Warmth

This is the last fic I’m going to post for @drawlights advent calendar prompt list. This challenge has been so much fun and it has made me write again. Although not every ficlet I wrote was great, I’ve written about 22k words in one month, which is more than I wrote in the other eleven months of 2019. And I was so happy for every like or reblog, so thank you very much for that!

This fic is a continuation of my very short entry for day 21 (”gift”) - you can read that part here.

***

One year, Aziraphale doesn’t simply let him go to do his alleged evil deeds.

“I’m coming with you,” he declares.

“What? Why?” Crowley wants – no, he doesn’t want, he needs to get away from Aziraphale’s kindness and the warmth of the bookshop. Right now.

“No one should be alone on Christmas.”

And that’s once again the sort of thing that Crowley can’t bear to hear. The words are a delusion. They can’t apply to him. “Cut the bullshit,” he snarls, shoves Aziraphale out of his way and heads for the door. “I’m a demon, I don’t care about Christmas and God’s love for all creatures, so that he sent his only son to be nailed to a cross and, whoop, all the sins are forgiven, what a huge amount of craptastic bullshit, I don’t need that -” He has already said too much and before he says even more, he kicks open the door – or tries to, anyway, because it opens in the other direction but he can’t be bothered now – he kicks again in frustration and then flings the doors open with an uncontrolled demonic miracle. The rational part of his brain registers that the old wooden doors creak dangerously and that makes him stop in his tracks. He is pretty sure that the one thing Aziraphale will not forgive is demolishing his bookshop. (And there’s that word again.) He takes an unnecessary breath to calm down, the harsh wind that blows into his face helps considerably, and turns around.

Aziraphale is standing in the open doors (which are quite unhinged), a frown on his face and the box with the chocolate truffles and the angel shaped candles which Crowley has given him as a Christmas present still in his hands. Crowley really has fucked up.

“Sorry,” he mumbles, “I’ll just…” He snaps and grimaces at the doors to right themselves. “Hope I didn’t destroy any holy wards.”

“As you well know, they cannot be destroyed by physical violence. Now, about that assignment of yours.”

“What about it?” Crowley has already forgotten the details of what horrible deed he had made up.

“I could help you.”

That’s not going to make things easier. Involving Aziraphale in a made up and completely unnecessary evil deed was not his plan and is, shockingly enough, nothing he really wants. “It’s nasty business. Wouldn’t want to tempt you to do evil on Christmas of all days.”

“Oh, come on, I’ve covered for you before. And we’ve found ways to work around the really nasty things several times. ”

Crowley shrugs and tries to come up with another argument to stop Aziraphale.

“You weren’t planning on really causing such a horrible car accident, were you?” Aziraphale asks slightly worried.

Ah, yes, car accident, that was his fake plan. One kid dead, the other permanently crippled, parents without a suitable insurance to pay for all the costs for the injured kid, embittered and in debt – by the way, the father had been the manager of a company, he now sacks all his employees, who in turn take it out on their families … Yes, very evil plan indeed to spread evil. And which now has Aziraphale worried. Great.

“Yeah, yeah, sure, I’ll find a way around the killing the kid part. So, no worries, you can stay inside, drink your mulled wine, stay warm, read a book, whatever.”

“But drinking mulled wine alone is awfully boring.”

Oh.

No one should be alone on Christmas, is what Aziraphale said earlier. Maybe he wasn’t just talking about Crowley.

Crowley heaves a deep, theatrical sigh. “Alright, alright. If you insist to do evil tonight – be my guest.”

“Wonderful.” Aziraphale actually claps his hands in satisfaction. “Let me just get a scarf and a hat and then I’m ready to go.”

He takes a bit longer and finally emerges covered in warm clothes and with a blessed picnic basket.

“What’s that? We’re going to do crimes, not a picnic.”

“I brought us a nice thermos of mulled wine. I mean, I could hardly let it go to waste, could I? And then I thought why not bring the mince pies, too? I bought them yesterday at…”

Crowley puts his hands in his pockets, leads the way and only half listens to the angel chatter happily about mince pies and his Christmas shopping.

Crowley needs to improvise now. And he preferably needs a rich family with two kids in a car. Where are people today? At home or… at church. Well, shit. Crowley leads them to St. Paul’s Cathedral. They sit down on a bench, Aziraphale opens the basket, retrieves a goddamn tartan thermos, and carefully pours mulled wine into the cap.

“Hell doesn’t usually send such specific instructions,” he says when he hands Crowley the cap. “So what is the goal of that assignment? What do they want to see achieved?”

“That manager firing all his employees.”

“Good. Then there really is no need for the car crash, wouldn’t you say? We just need to find another way for him to fire his employees.”

“Mhm. How about a kidnapping and blackmail?”

“Do we really have to involve the kids in this?”

“A robbery then.”

“In front of all these people who will leave the church together? I don’t think so.”

“We steal one of the cars here, chase him through London and then rob him.” That sounds exciting and something Crowley can see himself doing.

“Sorry, dear, I do not intend to discorporate today. Also, think of the poor family who has their car stolen on Christmas. Oh, they will be so devastated.”

Crowley snorts. “Aziraphale, you can’t do evil without inconveniencing anyone. That’s just part of the deal.”

“We’ll see about that. Now, leave some of that mulled wine to me, will you?”

Crowley rolls his eyes but hands Aziraphale the thermos cap.

Aziraphale sips it and hums thoughtfully once in a while. “What if we simply leave that poor man in peace and do the dismissals ourselves?”

Crowley considers this for a while. Forged notices, a fake TV statement, a few messages on twitter… “Oh, that’s clever.”

Aziraphale huffs. “You don’t have to sound so surprised.”

“It’s brilliant, actually. Think of all the chaos when the manager finds out about that! He hasn’t fired anyone personally but suddenly reads about it in the newspapers!” Crowley cackles gleefully. At that moment the church bells start ringing. He covers his ears because he really hates that noise. People pour out of the church, most of them unusually friendly. Aziraphale of course can’t help himself and throws blessings all around, smiles at people and wishes them a merry Christmas.

Crowley uses the time to drink another cap of mulled wine. When the commotion is over, they get to work. They start it off by sending the BBC an anonymous message which states that there is a rumour that a huge London company is supposedly bankrupt. Then they record a fake telephone call, which is meant to back up the supposed rumour. It takes them almost two hours because Aziraphale is complete rubbish at it. He cracks up every time Crowley uses his exaggerated supervillain voice, forgets his own lines or messes them up or uses some of his ridiculous old-fashioned words which are so out of place in a fake conversation between two sleazy London businessmen that Crowley cracks up in turn. When they finally succeed Aziraphale has forgotten to activate the record button on Crowley’s mobile. (He was so impressed with that feature that Crowley had shown him how to do it. What else are you to do when an angel is interested in modern technology for the first time in 6000 years?) Now Aziraphale is moaning and apologising nonstop and Crowley can’t stop giggling. He exploits Aziraphale’s regret to tempt him to take a selfie together, something Aziraphale has always been very wary of because he knows Crowley has invented them.

Crowley doesn’t really mind doing the recording again. In fact, he’s all too happy to do it. He hasn’t had so much fun in… decades, possibly centuries. Maybe ever.

After they have recorded a semi decent version and sent if off to the BBC again, they decide to do some more: a short radio feature about the collective dismissal of all of Robert McBrain’s employees. (Crowley has so far made up the name of the manager and the company.) Aziraphale is much better when he just has to read a report in a serious voice and so they finish that one shortly before midnight. Then Crowley convinces all the London radio studios to broadcast a feature about a company and a manager no one has ever heard of. Meanwhile, Aziraphale convinces all the London newspapers to print a report in their next issue that he has just written.

When they meet again at Trafalgar Square, it has started to snow a little. Small snowflakes dance around them in the icy wind but the mulled wine miraculously does not run out and keeps them warm.

“I do wonder about those poor people who will hear in the radio or read in the newspapers that they have lost their jobs,” Aziraphale says remorsefully.

“No need to worry, angel. McBrain will soon make a statement that all of it’s been just this huge false report and no one’s really sacked.”

Aziraphale nervously nibbles on a mince pie. “Still. They must be so shocked to hear about it. And on Christmas! It will ruin their whole day…”

Crowley sighs because he already knows what is coming next.

“Couldn’t we do something to ease their shock a bit? I mean…” Aziraphale gives him a sad, imploring, hopeful look. “I have already done something which is a bit bad. Now you could maybe do something a little bit not bad in exchange?”

Crowley pulls a face. He knows he’s being played but he can’t not do it. As much as Aziraphale doesn’t want to spoil Christmas for fictitious people who haven’t even really lost their job, Crowley doesn’t want to spoil Aziraphale’s Christmas. “Alright, whatever. You have anything in mind?”

Aziraphale smiles gratefully. “I thought about writing them an encouraging letter. Maybe add a few sweets. Bless their homes.”

“You want to go to all of them?” What is a reasonably low number of employees? “All fifteen humans?”

“Fifteen? Earlier you said something about five hundred.”

“I definitely said fifteen.”

“Hm, all the better then, right? Come on, Crowley, you don’t even have to write the letters or deliver them. Just drive me there?”

Of course he agrees. While he pretends to use his mobile to hack the account of the fictitious company to find out who the employees are and where they live, Aziraphale retrieves notepaper and a fountain pen from the picnic basket and starts to write:

Whatever you hear, do not be worried. Everything will turn out fine in the end!

Have a merry Christmas and may God bless you and your family every day of the year.

“Do you think this will do?” he asks Crowley.

“If I got an anonymous note like this, I’d probably freak out. – But then, I’m a demon,” he quickly adds when he sees Aziraphale’s worried expression. “Blessings sound like a threat to me. Humans might like it, though.”

Aziraphale nods and makes to write fourteen more of the ominous notes. Meanwhile, Crowley creates a new secret folder on his mobile (password: fuckoff) and places all their failed recordings and the selfie into it.

It is an odd way to spend Christmas Night: driving through London and watching Aziraphale pull miraculous amounts of sweets from his picnic basket and bestow blessings to people who will have no idea what is going on when they receive their letters. As the company doesn’t exist and therefore no one will be worried to have lost their job when they hear the news, Crowley just aimlessly drives through London and makes his way up on the go. He stops at places that look like they could use some angelic blessings and confidently tells Aziraphale that this is definitely one of McBrain’s employees. The wind blows small snowflakes against the front screen and the Bentley plays “Thank God it’s Christmas” on a loop. During its twelfth rendition Aziraphale starts to softly hum along. The streets are unusually empty but Crowley still doesn’t go faster than his usual 90mph because, as ridiculous as it is, he likes it and he doesn’t want the night to end.

But eventually they have delivered the last letter.

“There’s still some mulled wine left,” Aziraphale says. “What do you say, we stop at St. James’s and drink it there?”

Crowley hums his agreement and drives them there. They are, obviously, the only ones in the park because no one else would go there at five am in the winter (and because its doors are closed to humans during the night). Aziraphale gets distracted by a squirrel that was frightened by Crowley’s presence. Crowley leaves him to it and finds a bench underneath a large tree where they will be mostly sheltered from the snow. He opens the basket which by now is almost empty. Aziraphale must have given out all the sweets with the exception of the box of chocolate truffles that Crowley had given him. There are also the angel shaped candles. Crowley ignites them, places them in the snow in front of the bench, and pours mulled wine into the thermos cap, which steams in the cold air. It looks almost cosy.

He sees Aziraphale a few feet away, kneeling on the ground, his eyes closed, his hands folded neatly – praying. Crowley hopes with all of his strange human heart that Aziraphale isn’t worried and doesn’t ask for forgiveness for what he has done. Because he has had fun, has enjoyed himself and has laughed, and Crowley doesn’t want him to ask for forgiveness for his laughter.

Finally he joins Crowley on the bench. He primly folds his hands in his lap and looks at the angel candles in front of them.

“Sooo.” Crowley pushes the cap with mulled wine into his hands. “Pretty successful night for you, eh?”

“Hm?”

“Well, you thwarted my evil plan, distributed dozens of blessings throughout London… Guess they’ll be happy with you up there.”

“Oh. I hadn’t thought about it like that.”

Crowley shrugs and points at the box of chocolate. “Some chocolate as a reward?”

“Well, we certainly did work hard, didn’t we?” Aziraphale opens the box but then pauses. “You won’t get in trouble for this, will you? I mean, you didn’t exactly stick to the plan…”

Again he looks so genuinely worried and Crowley hates it. He wishes he could tell Aziraphale that there never has been any assignment, wishes they could agree on how much fun their little chaotic coup has been nonetheless, wishes he did not have to hide Aziraphale’s laughter in a password protected folder on his mobile. And that’s all these pesky Christmas feelings again. Wishing, longing, hoping – too much.

“It’ll be fine,” Crowley says to reassure Aziraphale. “You know that Hell doesn’t really understand earthly business. From their perspective, the job is as good as done. Come on, let’s devour these chocolates.”

Aziraphale of course does not so much devour as savour every bit of them. They pass the thermos cap between them and watch the candle light dance across the snowy ground. Crowley should be cold but it feels like the little candles, which defy the wind and refuse to burn down, the mulled wine passed between them and Aziraphale’s presence create a safe bubble of warmth around him.

[laketaj24]

Twisted: Gangster!M’Baku/ Dom!Erik

Thirst 💦👅 Day requests for you! I have never written slap kink but hey, first time for everything. Triggers are in the tags! If you like my work reblog/like/comment lol Thank you! I have two more left!!!!! I know I’m bugging yall! my bad! 

Requests:  

Coming for the kinks, you say??? Well can I request a dub con fic with my beloved Killmonger? Lol - @vanitykocaine​

 Hey. I'm currently on vacation but I'm using the little ounce of free wifi that I can't get to send in a kink request 😂😂😂😂 Can I get a Erik with a praise kink? Either him praising the reader or the other way around but i need some nice Erik to even out all these good nigga Erik's 😂🤣 thanks love 😘❤❤❤ - @valynsia​​

Office sex with Erik? - @yaachtynoboat711​

I don't really have a kink to be honest. But maybe super possessive mob boss where he dated the reader and had a daddy type of relationship. They break up but he spots the reader out with a new boyfriend? Maybe super hot smutty public you will always belong to me sex? - @scumyeol​

Yay! I would die for some face/ass/titty slappin and biting with Erik. I dont care who's doin the slapping i just need a pain kink fic tbh.if you do this I'll be eternally grateful, if u dont i still love you dear!!! - Anon

Sooooo for that thirstday post....... all i can think of right now is m'baku and just straight up rough sex 😁😁😁 like the "you are being annoying because you haven't gotten any in a while so I gotta help you" type of sex - @pebblesz892​

So, thirst day? I’d like to request M’Baku with hair pulling and dirty talk. Please and thank you 😈 - @muse-of-mbaku​

Mbaku smut- @mbakuwifey​

You and Erik had been together for nine months and you didn’t want anyone else, even your ex M’Baku. Some things were not meant to be and that just happened to be one. Erik had his ways… Selfish. Loud and arrogant but when all the bullshit washed away you saw the real him. The him that truly wanted this to work with you. He opens the door for you and your Manalo heels hit the floor.

“We ain’t gotta stay long if you don’t want to.” Erik places his hand at the nape of your back and ushers you into the club with him. This was his scene. Always being seen talking to everyone and he had you right there with him introducing you like the Queen he claimed you to be. “This is my girl Y/N, Y/N this is Mike.”

You wave at him and talk casually then slip away from Erik dying for a drink and a moment to take it all in. You sit at the bar with your legs crossed. “Shot of Jack, please.”

“Sure thing.” The brown headed bartender said winking at you.

You shake your head knocking back the shot and watching your surroundings entertained. Then you feel a hand on your shoulder. “Enjoying yourself.” M’Baku whispers in your ear taking the barstool next to you for himself.

Your heart is heavy for a moment remembering how sultry that voice was and how it had the power to make you weak. “What do you want?”

“This is my spot.”

“Oh, you still illegally winning I see.” You roll your eyes and stand up from the bar. He’s in front of you shaking his head. “Can we talk for a minute? Five minutes?”

“About what?”

“You’ll know when we start talking.” M’Baku leads you out of the main area to a room overlooking the dancefloor. The music still loud but you were able to speak without yelling. “New guy?”

“yeah, he’s cool.”

“A fuck boy, but if that’s what you consider cool then okay.” M’Baku lights his blunt inhaling for a moment and sitting on the couch in front of you. “you moved on quick.” He slowly blows out the smoke leaving the room in a haze for a moment.

“It’s been almost a year. Who all have you fucked hmmm, big thug nasty M’Baku. I left you because you didn’t want to grow up or live in the real world. You wanted to sit up here and play all these fucking games and honestly I don’t have time for that shit.”

“Who are you talking to?” he stand placing the blunt in the ashtray and pulling you closer to him. “Perhaps this new man has given you some type of power that makes you think you can address me like you’re crazy but no. you could be fucking the entire squad and you’re still fucking mine. I think it’s time your remembered.”

“M’Baku, he’s looking for…” He’s before you shaking his head flipping you around so that your chest is flush against the glass. “M’Baku…”

“Keep saying my name.” He says with his hands traveling up your legs. You moan as he pushes into you with his thick fingers once and then again. The crowd below you can’t see you at all but the thought of Erik watching you fuck another man makes you wet. “Does he fuck you like I do?” M’Baku whispers in your ear aligning himself up quickly thrusting into you.  You’d forgot his power. His hands wrap around your ponytail and your head is against his chest as he pounds into you. “I don’t care who you have on your arm.” He grunts thrusting into you and pulling out slowly only to fill you again.

“Oh fuck.” You gasp hearing the smack of your skin together. You grab onto the bar as he increases his speed biting his lip while gripping your hair so hard it hurts. “I can’t breathe.” You scream. “I’m fucking coming.”

“Then come, what you holding that shit for?” M’Baku smiles slamming into you so hard you do come. You see fireworks explode around you as your snap your eyes shut. Your knees are weak barely holding you up and you feel him lift you up still fucking you over and over. “I want you to go home tonight and fucking feel me when you sleep.” He growled. “fuck that other nigga.” M’Baku feels you clutching around him and it triggers his own release. He spills into the condom with a roar that for sure could be heard downstairs and lowers you to the ground. “You better get dressed. Old dude probably on the hunt.” He picks up his blunt and tucks himself back into his pats leaving the room.

 Erik was insistent on you going home with him tonight and you didn’t want to, you wanted to wash M’Baku off your body. You wanted to cry in the shower and try to push out all the get good shit you and M’Baku had in the past, because he was not for you. You grab your overnight bag from the car following him into the house. Erik’s house was lavish like him.

“Baby, I sweated at that damn club all damn night. You mind if I get clean and I’ll be right up.”

“Nah ma, take your time I gotta finish some shit from the Outreach.” He kisses you on the lips softly and you go head up the spiral staircase. You bathe taking your hair down from the ponytail and slipping on one of Erik’s shirts. He was a hard worker. He was always in that office doing something. You head down the steps to his office where he is typing a few things into the computer. He had changed to, he was shirtless and smiling. “You done washing that nigga off?”

Your heart drops for the second time tonight into your stomach. “What?”

“You heard me…” He stands up from the desk and in three strides is in front of you. “You up there fucking yo ex like I don’t have people every fucking where watching you. So did you wash that nigga off?”

“Yes.”

“Nah, we at home now….” He raises his eyebrow at you awaiting your tone to change.

“Yes N’jadaka.” You look up at him with your mouth slightly parted trying to remember to breathe. “I’m sorry N’Jadaka.” You whimper. “Baby…”

He rubs your face softly and then his three fingers hit your face sending a zing pleasure below. “what are you sorry for?” Erik says rubbing your face again then he hits again and his hands down to the hem of your shirt pulling it over your head. “Tell your Prince what you sorry for?”

“Fucking M’Baku.”

“Giving another motherfucker what’s mine.” He growled. “Hmmm?”

“Yes…”

“Good girl, I like when you’re honest… sit on the desk. I didn’t get to eat today and I’m fucking starved.” He sucks air in through his teeth and you see those gold canines. “You’re not to come when I do this? You hear me?” He slaps your thighs crouching down in front of you, his eyes looking like they had seen a god. Erik laps his tongue over your clit and then sucks for a second. You were already sensitive and yearning but the teasing of him didn’t make it easy to not cum. You closed your mind off as he sucked and twirled down below pushing your lips firm against the cold wooden desk and taking his sweet time. Each time he licked your heart spiked and your breathing became more labored.

“N’Jadka please.” You moaned. “Please.”

“You don’t deserve that shit.” He said against your thigh. He raises from the ground leaves you aching. “What do you think you deserve?” he asks.

“To cum.”

“Nah, next…”

“Your dick.” You plea kissing him tasting yourself on his lips.

“Good as answer baby girl, drop to them knees for me.” You do in front of him and you stroke him in your hands. Then he knocks your hands down tapping the side of your face with his fingers again. “Suck.” He pushes to the back of your throat nearly suffocating you and then pulls out and then he’s back again causing your eyes to well. Erik slaps the side of your face over and over with his hand and you can’t take it. You want him inside of you and you try to pull away, but he has grasped the back of your head thrusting into you nonstop until your saliva is trailing from his dick. “Take it.” He growls and you do bobbing your head until he’s nearly there then he stops you.  “Good girl. You wanna come?”

“Please.”

“Please what?”

“Please N’Jadaka let me come.” He shakes his head and you can see the demon in him rising up. He grabs both of your breast gripping and twisting until it hurts then slapping and you feel yourself nearly come from the pleasure of it. He knew how to do those things to you. Erik places you back on the desk.

“What if I went around giving your dick away huh?” You don’t answer so he spreads your legs. “I told you I don’t like that sharing shit.” He smiles against your neck and lifts you just so he can slide into you. He pounds you for a few seconds and then slows when he feels your body tensing near a climax. “Nah, you don’t deserve to come. You ain’t sorry.” He slides out and your legs clamp around his waist. “What?”

“I am sorry.” You plea. “Please…”

“I ain’t convinced ma.” His tip toys at your entrance and you thrust forward and he moves teasing you. “You don’t run this shit.” Erik leans in and sucks on your neck and your throw your head back. “Next time, I will fucking kill him.” He says in your ear as he pushes back into you. Erik grips your hips bringing you to meet him at every thrust and your breathless scratching down his back and your boy starts to shake when the euphoria hits you in waves.

“Yesssssss.” You hiss. “fucking yessss N’Jadaka.”

“You gone see that nigga again…” He asks through clenched teeth.

“No baby.”

“That’s fucking right.” He growls tapping your face before he kisses you again. “Good fucking girl coming on daddy’s dick like that, god damn.” He chants in your ear licking from your earlobe to your neck. You come again as his pace quickens and you feel him swell inside of you. “God damn!” He pants withdrawing from you and sending his cum down your legs.

Tagging:  @challaxkillmonger @wakanda-inspired @misspooh @valynsia@vanitykocaine @harleycativy @jecourt@virgosapphire79@sparklemichele@theunsweetenedtruth@ahhhhkeya@iamrheaspeaks @thiccdaddy-mbaku@muse-of-mbaku@myboyfriendgiriboy @someareblindtoitsbeauty@brittyevans@almostpurelysmut @readsalot73@ivarsshieldmadien@slimmiyagi@cinnabearice @royallyprincesslilly @hutchj

[ratandphilgames]

Our Lives Don’t Collide

{chapter 4: in too deep} 

summary: Shit hits the fan when famous actor!Phil is caught smooching a boy in an alleyway. Only problem? He’s not out and what’s worse? The boy he was smooching was a journalist who set it all up to get a quick picture and now Phil is royally screwed. The only answer Phils management can come up with is a fake relationship to try and do damage control and famous actor!Dan is the perfect candidate.

chapter word count: 2478

total word count: 9936

rating: t

note: super thanks to everyone who likes/ reblogs/ sends me a message! the support has been amazing! also huge thanks to all the babes in the writing gc for motivating me to write! ily!

updates on thursdays!

{read on ao3}

{read from the beginning}

{next chapter} 

—–

The 2 boys ended up playing video games for an hour after they decided they’d become friends, which went surprisingly well. They were really just big nerds too tall for their own good, and it showed when they played video games.

Conversation flowed easily, bants were abundant, and afterwhile they both forgot they were there because of their fake relationship, it just felt like hanging out. It’d been a long time since Dan had just hung out with someone who was genuine and didn’t want something from him. At least with Phil he was upfront with what he wanted from Dan, it was all in contract form to keep it clear.

“Wotch your back Daniel, I’m creeping up on you.” Phil yelled as he gripped his controller more intensely.

In any other setting Dan would’ve been frightened by this sentence, but seeing as it was because Dan was currently in first place in an intense game of mario kart 8, it was rather acceptable. They were on the first lap of the animal crossing track, season: autumn, and Dan had already pulled ahead as he spent far too much time playing mario kart in his free time. When you don’t know who you can trust, mario kart will always be there for you.

“Oh are you? ARE YOU?” Dan had a bad habit of getting way too loud when it came to competitions. He was howling in a way that could be deemed offensive had he been playing with a different person, Phil however, just laughed at him as he attempted to catch up.

“Yes! You’re going down!” Phil shrieked, and before Dan even knew what was happening he was hit with a blue shell, effectively knocking him out of his first place position and letting Phil take the lead.

“YOU LITTLE SON OF A PFFT PSH PFT.” Dan was trying not to swear too much, as to leave a good first impression on his fake boyfriend, but goddamn it was hard. He ended up just making random exhales of air as he tried to earn back his spot in first place.

Phil found so much joy in that little blue shell moment, his eyes were lit up and he was laughing like a maniac and just a little part of Dan felt that it was worth letting him win if he got to see him being so happy. The rest of Dan wanted to crush all his hopes and dreams as he destroyed him at mario kart.

They kept up the back and forth game of going between 1rst and 2nd until the third lap when Dan had pretty much established himself as winner in his own eyes. That was until the biggest upset in the history or time when Phil got the bullet on the last corner and won by a very small margin. Needless to say Dan threw his controller and Phil laughed so hard he was snorting.

“I won! Take that, Danny boi!” Phil had stood up on his couch and stared down at Dan in victory.

“Danny boi? Oh god this is embarrassing. Losing mario kart in my own home, to a noob.” Phil was hardly a noob, but Dan liked to tease. He glossed over the fact that he’d earned himself a new nickname, one he’d surprisingly never heard before. After his high school experience with gems such as ‘dick loving dan’ and ‘homo howell’ he’d have thought he’d heard every variation of his name possible, but Phil was constantly coming up with new ways to surprise him.

Mid gloat Phil’s phone started buzzing nonstop and he put a pause on his victory chant to reach down and grab the vibrating device. Phil plopped himself back down onto a seated position as he checked his phone to see who his caller was, as Dan started deciding on the next track they should play.

“Oh, uh, I’ve got to take this, it’s my manager.”

Dan barely looked up as he waved him off to allow him to go answer his phone. As Phil exited the room he could hear a greeting being exchanged and then some whispering. If he tried he could make out the words, but that was wrong, right? Eavesdropping was bad and he shouldn’t do it. Dan maintained that idea until he heard his name spoken and then curiosity got the better of him. He crept quietly, almost spy like towards the entryway of his living room, just far enough that he could better hear, but not too far that it would be unnatural if Phil were to walk back in and see him. Dan was just hanging out on the edge of the couch, nothing weird about that.

“It’s going okay, Liam. He seems cool, everything will be fine.” Phil was pacing back and forth through the hallway, making parts of his sentence quieter than the rest, but the message Dan received was loud and clear in his ears. Phil Lester thought he was cool.

Suddenly all those fanboy feelings Dan had been repressing through the time they spent together were resurfacing as he played those words over and over and over again in his head. All that mumbo jumbo about Phil being just a regular guy flew out the window as Dan heard himself being complimented by one of the most iconic actors of the recent era (and not to mention overall attractive man).

Phil Lester thinks you’re cool.

That was one hell of a confidence booster.

Dan zoned out and missed  the rest of the convo because goddamnit he was cool. Shans advice really worked, he played it cool and it payed off in the end.

As Dan’s brain was still processing the idea that he was cool, he heard Phil’s footsteps and realized he must’ve hung up the phone and was headed back towards the lounge, back to Dan. As this truly hit Dan, he scrambled to seem casual, natural, and cool.

“Hey, I think I’m going to head off soon, manager called my car already.” Phil said as he made his reappearance, seemingly not noticing Dan’s less than usual behavior.

“Okay, cool.”

Fucking hell don’t say cool, that makes it seem like you were eavesdropping.

Dan had been eavesdropping but he didn’t want Phil to know he’d been listening in. Already feeling the effects of guilt for being a sneaky little shit, Dan made sure to avoid meeting Phil’s gaze, although that probably just made him seem even more sketchy.

“Yeah, so, thanks for having me over, and for the whole- ya know, fake boyfriend stuff. Really saved me there.” Phil was fidgeting with his fingers as he stood awkwardly by the lounge entrance, having yet to step back into the room as he knew he’d be leaving soon.

“Oh yeah, sure. No problem, should be fun. Speaking of which, what’s the next thing we need to do?” Dan asked, unsure how to about this thing. They needed to be spotted together a lot to be seen a realistic couple, and with paparazzi swarming the both of them at the moment, it wouldn’t be hard to strike up buzz.

“Uhhh probably just more social media stuff, get people hooked. We’re ‘like a drug’ to the fans according to my agent.” Phil shifted uncomfortably as he quoted his agent, clearly as uneasy about the way it sounded as Dan was. A drug? What did that even mean?

“Sooooooooooooo should we hang out like this again sometime? Soon?” Maybe Dan was just hoping he could spend more time with Phil, but he could paint it as part of the deal and nobody would ever have to know the difference.

“Yeah, I’ll text you.” Dan simply stared at Phil because how in the hell did he have his number? Did his publicist give it to him? This whole goddamn time they could’ve been texting each other? And they weren’t?

“That was a hint for you to give me your phone so I can put my number in it.” Phil said with a chuckle.

Oh.

Dan grabbed his cell off the little coffee table, the place he’d set it down when they first started playing mario kart, and stood to hand it to Phil, trying to keep his head down so his blush wasn’t too apparent.

Of course he wants your number, you have to communicate somehow. Don’t read too much into this, don’t read too much into this, don’t read too much-

“We still need to take that picture, ya know, to make us instagram official.” Phil said, startling Dan out of his thoughts and handing him back his phone. Phil really typed fast.

“Yeah, Shannon- er my manager- will kill me if we forget. Like actually behead me, like hide the guillotine.”

Phil just laughed at his weird attempt at humor, bless his little heart.

“Alright well let’s do this thing, I’d rather like you to keep your head attached to your body.”  

Dan tapped around on his phone a little bit and pulled up the camera and both boys positioned themselves so that the lighting was okay and they could both be seen effectively.

They took a few of them together, smiles bright with Phil peeking over Dans shoulder.

And then Phil did something unexpected.

He reached his long neck over and planted a soft lil kiss onto Dan’s cheek, right over his dimple and Dan, unsure of how to react, just kept snapping pictures. And once Phil felt they had a sufficient amount to pick from with the cheek kisses, he snuggled his face into Dan’s neck and Dan just kept taking those pics, his body wanting him to have a completely different reaction.

Holy fuck.

Just as fast as Phil had attached to himself Dan he was backed away, the smile not leaving his face though.

“Sorry, hope that wasn’t awkward.”

“Oh, no, you’re fine, we’re both actors right? Totally fine. I’ll go through and find the good ones and post them later. Gotta call my mum first or she’ll be livid, ya know how it is.”

Dan was rambling, trying to make the situation seem casual when really his insides were ready to explode out of his ass.

“I haven’t even told my mom about the whole gay thing. I’m not quite sure how she’ll take it, so I just kind of… put it off.”

All Dan wanted to do was hug the guy, all the dumb crush feelings forgotten as he remembered how rough things actually were for Phil right now. Publicly outed, not even getting a chance to tell his family. It sounded like hell, yet he was handling it like a champ. Almost too well.

“That’s no good. You’ve gotta talk to your mum, call her up. Throw down the facts. If she doesn’t like it then I’ll be your mum from now on, simple as that.”

Phil laughed a little at that last part, but overall seemed uncomfortable with the idea. Dan could definitely see why, it was terrifying to think that the one person that’s supposed to love you unconditionally could turn you away simply for being true to yourself, but he also knew that finding out your son was gay from the internet was 100 times worse than hearing it from him.

“We’ll see.”

“Call me up if you need emotional support, I know a thing or two about this whole ‘coming out’ bullshit.” It had been a daunting process for Dan, no one in his family understood what being bisexual even meant, he was constantly being asked if he was sure he wasn’t just gay or just straight but in time they learned and now’s in a pretty good place with his family.

“Thanks, I might take you up on that offer. Maybe.”

“You can’t run away from your problems.”

“I can try.” Phil said with a shrug.

“You’re a mess Lester.”

“Well when you get your shit together and post on instagram, I’ll officially be your mess.”

That stopped Dan in his tracks, unable to think of a witty remark to keep up their little game because surely that was flirting. This wasn’t just Dan making up little things in his head, anyone would interpret that as flirting, right? If this was just for the public Phil wouldn’t have said that inside the confidence of Dan’s home, where nobody was around to hear them.

Lucky for Dan, the buzzer went off moments later, covering his ass.

Dan quickly moved from the lounge, where they were standing, to his little foyer, and over to the intercom.

“Hello.” Dan said into the little microphone, realizing Phil had followed him into the room only after he felt a little tickle of breath on his neck.

“I’m here to pick up Phil Lester, and no sir, this isn’t a prank.”

Dan felt just a little embarrassed as he typed in the password to open the gate. He had only been asking if he was being pranked because he’d been told the wrong day, it was a valid question at the time, now it just felt a little silly.

“Alright, well, I’ll see you later I guess.” Dan said.

“Yeah, I’ll be looking out for your instagram post.”

“You better turn on notifications.”

“Oh, I will.”

Again, Dan had a blush on his face because of Phil.

The doorbell began ringing and before he opened the door, Dan looked over at Phil and said “don’t forget about your mum, Phil,”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Dan smiled at him and Phil smiled back and then Dan opened up the door and stepped out of the way so that Phil could get through. Standing there, outside, was the same muscular man that had been with him when Phil was left at Dan’s home less than 2 hours ago.

It didn’t feel like that little of time had passed, yet it truly had been less than 2 hours. Dan waved as Phil got into his car, making it seem like a bigger thing than it was for all the people with cameras lined up behind his iron gate which he was certain were taking pictures like mad.

After Phil’s car had pulled away, Dan went back inside and immediately flopped down onto the couch and clicked the tv off from when they were playing mario kart earlier.

Dan was in deep. So incredibly deep.

This little rendezvous only furthered Dan’s suspicion that he liked Phil, like a lot. He was just as fantastic in real life as Dan had imagined which was really just a big problem.

What’s one to do when they like their fake boyfriend? That’s just a whole new level of complicated that Dan didn’t want to delve into just yet. So he just put it off, the exact thing he’d advised Phil against doing.

God, he was in so so deep. 

[lostherlemons]

BIG gay post about how my girlfriend i came to be: laura version

i wanna make my own post like that but i don’t know if i could properly convey everything because oftentimes words can’t really do my experience justice. but like. that made me relive everything from my point of you and i can very tangibly feel affection and happiness bubbling up within the depths of my stomach and i gotta spill it out. i just gotta.

for those of you that didn’t know me beforehand bc you followed me from robin or just generally followed me sometime in the last half year or so, my relationship before robin was very very bad. the entire thing was kind of a giant guilt trip where i got emotionally manipulated for months until I succumbed to dating the guy (and being sexual with him when i Was Not Ready) and it was often miserable- but due to the toxic nature of the situation and my inability to assert myself in a way that he could take seriously, the relationship lasted for a pretty long time and took me a good 7 months to finally break up with him. I’ll leave it at that because it’s not the focus and explaining it isn’t a fun experience.

I’m hesitant to start the story like this because it seems so negative but like. It’s important for the context because the aftermath of what he put me through lasted a long time. we broke up probably exactly a year ago but i was reeling and recovering for a very long time and it made me very bitter towards romance in general and very much a skeptic (which robin turned right back around). but anyway. now for the happy part!

robin and i met, as they said, on their 18th birthday at a lgbt ice cream social. my very first distinct memory is of robin being part of the group i was talking to at the time and in a very cute moment, got me to guess what age they were. i guessed 20+ and was wrong and robin was very pleased that they came off so mature to me. we generally stuck together after that through the event (after sharing Tumblrs and such), which i didn’t think much of at the time because I was in the prior relationship still and i was just having a good time with my friends!! eventually we decided to ditch the place and hang out at friends apartment but robin was very new to the Bellingham scene and wasn’t sure about taking the bus and stuff and got left behind. I felt very bad because I was driving everyone and could have easily transported robin without the bus and such. I agonized over it for a long time!! It was very silly of me but I spent a lot of time wishing we could have hung out more than just that night.

We of course had a long period of just being Silently Supportive mutuals and never got to hang out. I remember them staying in school over the summer and wanting VERY BADLY to hang out but not being sure how to go about it because I’m awkward and didn’t know Rob that well. Over the summer we ended up interacting, and low-key commenting and stuff, and it was good. At a certain point I remember thinking Robin was cute. Immediately after this realization I kinda figured out I was in for a shitshow in crush town.

I spent most of September with a big huge growing crush. Every time robin even POSTED a selfie I got so excited! They were so cute!!! At a certain point I was aware of my crush and COULD NOT SHUT UP ABOUT IT. Every time robin even liked my post I would gush about it nonstop to @funkadacious and you can ask him because I would never shut up and stop sending him their cute selfies. Somewhere in the midst of all this, in an interaction during robin’s fai blogging, i reassured them that they were pretty and robin IMMEDIATELY AND SHOCKINGLY admitted they thought i was hot upon first meeting me and i lost my shit, died, and descended unto gay heaven all while continuing to flirt back and forth for a bit.

I could not believe it. ROBIN. THE ONE I COULD NOT SHUT UP ABOUT. THOUGHT I WAS HOT AND WAS FLIRTING WITH ME. WHAT. AM I DREAMING. WHAT IS HAPPENING. you can imagine.

when school started in late september, i posted a few VERY INTENTIONALLY FLATTERING AND CUTE SELFIES, literally only so that i could passively grab more attention from robin. who reblogged them and made me feel very nice.

now, when my year-long depressive episode got to a bad spot in october, robin surprised me by offering to hang out because I probably needed someone to talk to. I of course said yes (all while gushing to nick, casey, all my classmates in theatre class, and literally any coworker that would listen including my poor boss who still hears this all the time) and spent the next few days in a giddy excitement until meeting robin for coffee after my theatre class.

i was dizzy upon seeing them sitting at that last table in the cafe. this was real and robin was there, VERY CUTE and in person for the first time in over a year, and they were waiting for me. ME. WHAT. i got a coffee and a pastry to share and sat down.

We talked for hours and hours and hours. About art, school, growing up, mental health, everything. I remembered how robin talked fast when they were excited and thought it was adorable. Eventually the sun started to set and it reflected in their eyes and I literally had to pause the conversation to admit I could not stop staring at how beautiful they were. Eventually my mom called me and i didn’t have the nerve to tell her I was getting coffee with my crush but eventually she hung up and soon after the dreaded question popped up.

“So. Im kinda wondering. Is this a… uh.. a date? Or like a friend thing? Or both..? I’m just curious, anything is fine.”

“Oh! UH. IT… CAN BE WHATEVER YOU WANT IT TO BE…..”

“Okay! It’s a date then.”

Cue me dying. At the end of said date, robin asked if a hug was ok (right after I made the best pun of my life about kissing) and it was VERY okay and I clung for dear life and it was wonderful.

The weekend after this, I was traveling internationally during what was hyped up to be a VERY BIG STORM to get up to canada for @limes-and-kiwis birthday. I was told by many Not to go, but I’m a stubborn fuck. Robin texted me and was VERY FLIRTATIOUS when I was on my way up saying I had to stay safe! For our second date!! And this text made me so excited I literally had to stop by my work on my way up and show the text to my manager and I was dead!!!!

i of course made it safely and had a wonderful time with casey. Me, being gay, at one point had to go through robin’s selfie tag to show Casey, and I passed her my phone. Immediately after i had the realization that my best friend was an untrustworthy wingman and I was a dead man. I of course get my phone back with EVERY SELFIE OF ROBINS FOR THE LAST YEAR, LIKED, and of course casey is extremely proud of herself and smug as all hell. Me, being mortified, of course had to send a very embarrassing “IT WASN’T ME STALKING THROUGH YOUR PHOTOS I CAN EXPLAIN” message to robin over snapchat, which opened a new can of worms and was a cue for MUCH MUCH MORE FLIRTING.

we of course went on a second date after I got back, and also ran into eachother at the grocery store a few days later which I gave robin a ride home from and got a kiss on the cheek. I was grinning for hours afterwards and my boss made fun of me.

eventually at the party with robin’s friends, I flirted A LOT and we were very affectionate and at one point a friend said we very very cute and asked how long we had been dating. We looked at eachother and I was like “ok so this is official? We’re gfs?? Yeah?” And robin agreed and we were OFFICIAL. GFS. THE ONES YOU KNOW AND LOVE. and the rest of the night was very very good and cuddly and I was the happiest I had been in a while.

the relationship really only got better and better from there. Robin is SO supportive and so loving and smart and I adore them so so much. They make me feel safe and appreciated and I can only hope I do the same. Robin touched on A Lot in their post and described things better than I ever could but like. It’s true. Everything is just… better.

robin’s February Thing was also accompanied by Laura’s February Thing, and so we both had very bad brains at the time and being silly, had a hard time reaching out. But the next day when I found out what was going on, I had a moment of clarity. Sure I was terrified of reaching out, and being rejected, or having a fight, but I realized I couldn’t risk losing what I have with robin. It’s grown to be everything to me and i knew I had to see them no matter what and I did and it was so healing and good and I’ll never regret just marching across campus to their dorm.

but anyway. This got long. Basically I’m very much in love and will never shut up about it. @flovvright is the light of my life and every moment I spend with robin is perfect. Because we fit so perfectly together and it’s just… It’s good. It’s real good. I never thought I’d be at this point and it constantly amazes me. I don’t know what else to say but rest assured there’s a lot left unsaid and I just want my girlfriend to know how much they mean the absolute world to me and how they just consistently make my life a better life no matter how hard things get.