#yes I made this one to be educational
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Ask box is open and I am taking poll suggestions
#yes I made this one to be educational#we need to talk about these symptoms more#and just how disabling adhd can really be#fuck marry kill#fmk#fmk game#fmk poll#poll#polls#tumblr polls#adhd#adhd symptoms#apd#adhd apd#auditory processing disorder#rsd#adhd rsd#rejection sensitive dysphoria#intrusive sleep#adhd intrusive sleep#adhd sleep
160 notes
·
View notes
Text
Prompt 271
“Grandmother is visiting,” Damian suddenly said with no warning and with his usual not-quite demanding tone.
“Who?” Tim wasn’t the only one to startle, seeing as Bruce had practically froze, a downturn to his lips in a silent show of confusion.
Damian scowled. “Are you deaf Drake? Grandmother is coming to Gotham to, quote, make sure I am being properly cared for.” None of them had known that Ras was with anyone actually. At least Tim was pretty sure that would have been in the files.
“Oh?” Dick didn’t quite crouch to Damian’s height but it was a near thing. “She-” “He,” Damian corrected, interrupting him. They all exchanged a glance before Dick continued.
“Is he coming to the Manor or…”
Damian scoffed again, a tiny bit of a flush against his face. “No, Grandmother will most likely be staying with Akhi-”
Now wait one moment-
“YOU HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER?!”
#DCxDP#DPxDC#Prompts#Deadly Decisions#Danny & Ras are the homoerotic rivals that no one knows if they’re flirting or attempting a murder#It’s actually both they’re just also both Immortal#Danny to Jason: You can become a crime lord if you finish college- you’ve said you wanted to get a degree this is ur chance#Dusan (nodding): Mother has made all of us finish at least our basic education nephew#Why yes this does mean that RH has just made the heads in a duffel bag debut & the bats have no clue it’s Jason#Normally Danny wanders the universe but RAS (affectionately derogatory) HOW DARE U TRY TO HIDE THE GRANDCHILDREN#Morally Gray Danny#He’s well over 300 and that has an affect lol#Also has some fun fae vibes thx to his ghost half & human half finally balancing out#Let Jason & Damian be brothers#Tiny Damian: Akhi look I found a frog :>#Jason (newly not brain damaged & has no clue who this small child is): …. That’s great#Tiny Damian: *GASP* Akhi you can talk now :D#Fuck it- all the Al Ghuls deserve fangs from ecto contamination#Is Danny actually Dusan & Talia’s mother? No one knows and no one wants to ask the probably immortal fae being okay#Danny brought Damian a ghost hound puppy & Jason an original signed Pride & Prejudice book#How come Bruce wasn’t aware of Danyal? Talia forgot to inform him that the mother she was speaking of is in fact still alive#He disappears for a decade sometimes longer she was using past terms how was he supposed to know
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
I feel like anyone who's about to embark on attempting to type out a character's accent phoentically (at least as well as one can with English) should probably stop for a moment before they get going and ask themselves, "How would I, myself, feel about a fic where the one character who sounds like me had their speech written out like this and every other character just got their dialogue left in standard spelling?" I feel like a lot of people would tone it down a bit, at least, if they'd done that thought experiment first.
(Anyone who answered "but I don't have an accent!" isn't allowed to write out anyone else's accent, ever. This rule may seem harsh but you need it. Really, you do. Because you've never had anyone treat your accent as abnormal or comical or wrong, so you really don't know what you're inflicting on others here.)
#writing stuff#have you read that fic where the socially prestige accent is the one being carefully typed out “like it sounds”? no? neither have i :(#the obvious note-for-Americans on typing out UK accents is that most of them carry some connotation of class and/or 'education'#within the uk: ask yourself why a Geordie gets typed out but not some dude from the Home Counties#typing out an accent is - usually - a roundabout way of saying “this person talks WRONG! they're not NORMAL!”#you may also find 'Scottish Twitter' informative for the distinction between in-group and out-group 'transcriptions' of accent/dialect#(i use that example only cos I'm Scottish btw)#(oh yes EVERYONE thinks I have an accent! and many of them attempt to replicate it badly in text!)#fun story: one time i had to learn the [IPA] for a linguistics class and the examples were 'standard' English pronunciations#and I went in the next day BAFFLED by why the book insisted that 'boot' and 'foot' don't contain the same vowel sound#(cos they fuckin do don't they?!)#the tutor explained and was v interested in the fact that to me they're the same. i was then asked to demonstrate again for the class.#but i - alas - was not offered repeated examples of however the fuck people say boot and foot in RP :(#(this was IN SCOTLAND btw)#anyway mibbe jist dinnae dae it? mibbe?#and if you do you have use the actual IPA. there now i've made it more trouble than it's worth for most people.
275 notes
·
View notes
Text
Maybe a Christian fiction writer just needs to tell the truth. Then tell a better truth.
#Yes it is a broken world! That is true! But a) brokenness doesn’t come in only one flavor (and for that matter neither does escapism#There are things I rather like to get away from in my preferred fiction#Like I’ll tolerate some of the things I like to get away from as long as the author doesn’t wallow in it before getting to the better truth#b) In this world you will have trouble#Doesn’t help me without#But take heart! I have overcome the world#And c) That the breaking will be mended in the end we Christians know and it’s at the heart of every really good story I believe*#but what of this often wildly beautiful in-between time called life that we currently experience? It’s still true too.#Taste and see that the Lord is good!#“Pine trees are just as real as pigsties and a darn sight prettier too”#*some may say that tragedies are the category that negate this idea and it’s true I haven't made a study of tragedies and what their#appeal is because they don’t often appeal to me but I’m sure there’s a reason#If only because light shines brighter in the darkness#So to circle back to my first point yes some stories need to not shy away from darkness but if it ends there you have to consider what#The point of it all is and whether it glorifies God. so it’s not as simple as no tragedies but I think you have to at least imply the#Better Truths#Anyway now I’m just rambling and people who like tragedies should come educate me on why#But the idea of telling the truth and then telling a better truth has been percolating for at least a month now and so I must now test#the brew so to speak
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
Patrick Troughton guests as ruthless racketeer George, out to silence the man who can identify his brother as a murderer, in Dial 999: Key Witness (1.26, ABC, 1959)
#fave spotting#patrick troughton#dial 999#doctor who#classic doctor who#two#abc#key witness#1959#as with other Dial 999 posts‚ the episode number and year of transmission are more in the way of educated guesses#tho two separate sources identify this as ep 26 so that's good enough for me#yes it's been a while‚ i got very distracted and wandered away from Dial 999 but I'm mopping it up now#this was a very pleasant surprise‚ not least because Pat had already made two appearances in the series: a minor role as a heavy in 1.5 and#an uncredited appearance as a tramp in 1.16 (both can be found if you follow the fave spotting tag) so i wasn't really expecting him to#turn up again. but he does! and he finally gets a real meaty part! he's the villain of the week‚ a criminal of vague occupation (he has#something to do with gambling? race tracks maybe? idk it kind of gets glossed over) but when his kid brother kills a rival and is easily#apprehended‚ Pat decides it's time to silence the witness... cue a tense cat and mouse as Pat and goon tail their mark as the police tail#them. genuinely one of the most enjoyable episodes of this funny little series i think‚ and a lot of that is down to Pat giving it his#all as a dangerous gangster. he lounges around in a dressing gown‚ he slaps his bro around‚ he jeers at the cops and he#threatens his lawyer with a watery sack grave. he's gone full villain! and it's delightful!
113 notes
·
View notes
Text
Had an "and quartz of course" moment the other day when I was wearing a pendant of the Venus of Willendorf and two of my colleagues went "oh yes that's mesopotamian is it?"
#Legit no judgement it was just funny to realise#The one thing it reveals is that our education system has Failed us in that apparently most of us are incapable of imagining the concept of#'primitive' art in Europe#Which obv has roots in colonialism and racism#But that's not the fault of the individual colleagues in question ofc#Another colleague went ah yes she's a fertility symbol right a#And I went wellllll that's debatable. But that is such a common and widespread interpretation incl among experts that I will not be salty#I am just salty that even among experts it is so prevalent to see a representation of a fat woman and think the only reason#Someone could have made her is to signify fertility. Not that I think it's impossible or even unlikely#It's just sad that it's the Only reason ppl can imagine#'exaggerated traits that signify fertility' what do you mean exaggerated she looks like my mum
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
that being said....self titled was just such a moment tho like when i say that was a formative album for me i mean that shit
#at the cusp of teenage girlhood lol 15/16 abt to graduate high school really kearning abt feminism/social justice for the first time#growing up in nigeria never really had to think abt that stuff cos no one around me cared much#i watched one of chim*manda's ted talks on feminism and it was like i activated like yesss finally a way to describe the injustice I'd been#seeing all around me. yes we had social studies/civic education in schools but who tf was teaching feminism in a patriarchal ass society#like nigeria. we didnt even have history as a subject lmao that country....God help us is the only thing i can say atp#anyway i need you to understand how hypeee teenage me was when i heard flawless like WOAHHH it was like beyoncé was inside my head...#then XO? WOW#grown woman???? i watched that video every morning and night it was my religion for a couple of months#BLUE? Oh i criedddd#7/11 made me look forward to getting drunk with my girlies lol#yoncé made me bi or at least realize i was#yeah I've always wanted to **** that lady thats why i cant even talk when she's dragged cos yall are so right to! but she's also sexy af 😔#it's almost 2am here pls dont take any shit i say/type seriously thankssss
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
i knew it'd been like... a series of years that i've seen your infj posts. whyyyyy didn't yoou just lock him up when you were dating this year!? the angsssttt. rooting for you tho xx k byee
yeahh it's also totally at least 50% my fault we're not together.
The good news is that since 2018 we became very good friends, and if it doesn't work, at least I've had some really good years of friendship. Plus, we put effort into being friends despite the things that have happened between us, so I feel like unless he hits my pet cat with a car, we'll always be friends.
And I didn't lock him down because I knew he was moving to Thailand. Even though he wanted to. (am i insane)
But yeah, I'm a woman approaching 30. I want someone who wants to be where I am. Or is at least very sure about me (he might have been, idk) but I currently have a great job, I would've followed him otherwise. Plus his job is only a 1 year-long post, whereas I'm a bit more stably employed. And I think I was just hurt he was moving so far? I want kids also, and in my family it famously gets harder to give birth past 30.. I just thought he couldn't feel as strongly about me if he was moving to Thailand (even though he asked to be together multiple times, god am I an idiot?), and my time is ticking since I really love and want kids.
#wow i'm an adult#wtf#an extra wrench is that I moved to a small town where i am#peak exotic#waaaay over educated for a woman#and although i think the education system here is quite good because it allows people to actually get paid without spending years on uni#i don't have much in common with the people here#also the one guy who i did date here#was very insecure about how educated i was and how much money i made#even though it was less than him#it wasn't less *enough* which is insane#so maybe i'm just feeling lonely and missing my friend#who i also wouldn't mind sleeping with#and like having kids with#and doing taxes with#and arguing with#i should've just said yes#he has my heart in thailand with him#entp#intj#personal#mine
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
How am I supposed to go from being ridiculed and judged for asking for help with my assignments/lessons in primary school to casually asking for help in college?? Am I supposed to act like my teachers and classmates didn’t screw me up in the head or
#college things#primary school things#no seriously#we were getting screamed at and made teachers disappointed if we did so much as ask for a simpler explanation or a repeat#and you expect me to casually ask my professors questions about my assignments???#emailing them is out of the question#they're gonna think I'm an idiot#which I am but no one needs to know that#it's so humiliating#shoutout to all the teachers and classmates who made me feel like a failure for not understanding everything right away#school trauma#I literally struggled to post ANONYMOUSLY on a discussion board once because I felt so stupid for asking a question#it doesn't help that I'm neurodivergent#and have a math disability#like it got so bad to the point where I was offended by people offering me help#because I was being indirectly told that needing help with your education is bad and that I should be ashamed#not to mention having the determine which classmates are nice and which ones will ruin your image if you ask for help#part of why I prefer working alone because I can't deal with that embarrassment#also yes this post helped me realize that school did in fact traumatize me in at least one way
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
tag limit hit ho gayi yaar
#haan toh main kya bol rahi thi.#haan unhone sab itna jaldi kiya cheek pe kiss bhi kiya i was like arey please no aap rakho itne saare paise i can't 😭#cause she already bought me that hoodie for like 700 rs#she was like i can't be here for your birthday na#bhai meko toh rona hi aa gaya itna saara pyaar i swear mere parents ko iska 1% bhi nahi hai mujhse😭😭#and money has been tight bachpan se cause shit happened in like 2013 or something and since then we've all been single#mindedly striving for highest paying jobs best education and now that she's finally there (touchwood)#i think it means a lot to her being able to spend money freeely for her loved ones#and with her idk i do believe that she loves me yes because she said ek baari when she was crying because kuch kuch hua tha#but also attending meeting office ki online rote hue sob karte hue kyunki parents time dekhkar thodi na ladte hai#and i didn't know how to help her and i knew they were. fighting subah se and she hadn't eaten anything so i made her cornflakes ka doodh#(her fav) and gave it to her table pe but it just made her sob much much harder and she couldn't drink it😭#but later on she said ki im so thankful i have you mujhe dikh raha tha ki you wanted to help but you didn't know kaise karu still you tried#and just you being there was enough in that moment#like i don't know why im thinking all this today maybe because bua is here home and she was home that time too it happened in front of her#all this she's the only person who knows what kinda shit dad does#and just. past few weeks i really genuinely wanted to kms like i would sit in morning class and i would look down at my hands and see the#veins and think one cut and it would all be over you're so tired i know you can rest now#it got so bad that i started wearing full sleeve clothes only so i couldn't look at them#but now. i won't say it's completely gone that feeling but like#i want to live because so many plans i have to with my sister how can i leave her alone#like not just for her but for me for us i want us to be happy together like we planned#like yk us as a unit doing things we've always dreamed of visiting places and bachelorette parties and clubbing and living with her and her#bf/husband when i need somewhere to run to and going on a no budget shopping spree and storing ice cream tubs in our house#like they used to do in american movies and her having kids me getting over my disgust for them helping her raise them clean them being#the masi and#I DON'T KNOW OKAY OMG😭#i felt so loved finally after a long time SACH MEIN real way mein#oh pata hai she also offered to pay mere tui ki fees bc i was complaining to mom ki papa kaise taunt maarte hai😭#like it's 20 fucking thousand waise toh kam hi hai but as a salaried person it's still a lot 😭
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Having a post get popular enough to be independently reblogged by someone you follow but aren't mutuals with is. Wild
#yes it was the sex poll obvs#given the person is a minor i'm very glad they picked answer one lmao#like i do think minors in general are allowed to want and even have sex (with each other obvs) but when it's a minor i personally follow it#would just make me feel pretty weird lmao. like on a personal level ya feel? i mean when u reach an even closer level it becomes not weird#again like my dear friend ness (17yo) who afaik doesn't actually HAVE any sex but occasionally wants to and i support her hot girl summer.#but as stated this person barely knows i exist i just follow his blog (i used they earlier but this was incorrect but tumblr won't let me e#edit the tag 😔) and he's 16yo so seeing him talk about wanting and/or having sex would have been. uncomfortable. like obvs he'd be allowed#to because my personal discomfort is no indication of morality but you get it. like if my big little cousin (she's 15 now by god the years#don't stop coming) were to talk about sex and stuff to me or within earshot i would ummm. throw myself out the window? but like i'd still t#try to be supportive and if push comes to shove then yes i would give her condoms 😔 cuz like if a minor wants sex i will not be able to sto#stop them lmao but i can at least try and make it somewhat safe y'know#actually i remembered i have literally given a 15yo a condom before lmao she's prolly over 20 now but like as the adult dormmate it was alm#almost like a responsibility y'know like what do you want me to DO?? let her get pregnant?? anyway enough tangent lmao#btw all this is also why in the poll i included 'too young' but didn't specify an age cuz that's individual y'know. some people are p late#bloomers (i was one) while others choose to have consensual sex by 14 y'know. not something i like to think about but that doesn't mean it#won't happen ya feel. i mean what am i the american education system? lmao. so some ppl have interpreted being 17 as too young but there's#also folks like this who clearly consider 16 old enough and that's defo ppl's good right. and again i usually don't mind just the fact that#he in particular is someone i already knew made it uncomfy. but anyway yea back on topic it's very interesting in general when your post#gets big enough to independently make it to ur dash thru a non mutual lmao. love the hellsite honestly where else amirite#personal#mine#ok to rb ig#like the actual body of the post anyway. i'd be pretty uncomfy if said person saw my tags on this cuz y'know it's kind vagueing even if it'#not negative but anyway. anyway#*kinda
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thor: Ragnarok is the best Thor movie and you can tell because nobody ever tries to make a desperate claim for prestige and reflected quality by calling it "Shakespearean," they just say they enjoyed it and they liked the jokes.
#thor ragnarok#“oh but ragnarok made the characters look silly” jan. jan. JAN. look at what they're wearing jan. look at the sets. recalibrate the sensors#i don't WANT to start sentences with “so with your vast experience and knowledge of Elizabethan/Jacobean English drama -”#or rather i do WANT i just DON'T (because one of them probably CAN name another early modern dramatist and i'd get that one for sure)#i KNOW they don't talk like the 16th century because i can actually understand the shite they're attempting to convey#also maybe you could look up when “the Viking Age” was and then when Will S was writing his dialogues. (i'll wait.)#“oh but they're in 21st century movies so they wouldn't -” YES EXACTLY.#they talk like characters from low-accuracy historical novels WHICH IS FINE but the genre-blindness on here bugs me :|#they talk more 'normal' in ragnarok and that's a good decision which i support fully (and also i enjoyed it and i liked the jokes)#and something about class and education and Literature and what we're 'allowed' to like and how SF is generally looked down upon#to the point where people who should know better insist on saying a film they like is actually more like a thing with much more prestige#i wouldn't put MUCH money on “i bet these film-makers explained how It's Not Reallly Science Fiction Though” but i'd put a wee bit on it#thor movies
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
if I had a nickel for every time someone dumbs Jesper down to comedic relief or is shocked when he said something smart, I'd be rich
#jesper!! isn't!! dumb!!#my man technically has more formal education than kaz and nowhere in the text does it ever imply he's dumb#YES he's funny and impulsive but that doesn't mean he can't do math or say intelligent things lmao#stop saying the adhd-coded character is just comic relief pls and thx#i *will* say he's made some pretty bad decisions#but i'm talking more about the posts i've seen where people are surprised he did quick math in one scene and stuff like that#jamie talks
8 notes
·
View notes
Photo
this is very cute and something i am very much enjoying, however, as a longtime gecko owner (specifically of cresties, as pictured above) i would like to make a warning to all the people begging for them to be united in one tank. unless these cresties are lesbians DO NOT PUT THEM IN THE SAME TANK!!!! male cresties tend to be very territorial and will attack their roomates (male or female).
all the people who are saying the tanks are too small are correct tho. i originally interpreted them as temporary enclosures (for when main homes are being cleaned or rearranged), but for permanent homes they should be taller and wider, as cresties are climbing geckos and have sticky little hands and tend to enjoy throwing themselves from great heights for their own entertainment. should probably also have some plants and hammocks which is why i didnt interpret it as the actual homes.
#this is entirely for fun and not a critique of the artwork or prompt#merely a bit of crestie education#crested gecko#art#i have two beautiful cresteds#sparkie and pumpkin#i am working towards getting pumpkin a bigger enclosure and moving her up into my room#sparkie already lives there and has a good set up but we got pumpkin during 2020 so she is a bit behind in that regard#fun fact about sparkie is that they are prone to throwing themself from one wall to another and making loud crashing noises at 2am#yes i use they/them pronouns for sparkie#we have made several attempts to figure out their sex in the 10 or so years we have had them and been unsuccessful#pumpkin is she/her
653K notes
·
View notes
Text
"Did you hear the stupid bigoted thing this known outrage farmer said? What a stupid thing he said! Let's post it everywhere and make the news 24/7 about that thing and make him the center of attention so more people can see the shitty things he said! There is no downside from giving the stupid bigot more of a platform!"
"What do you mean he is the president now. What do you mean he's the president a 2nd time. Nobody could have predicted this."
#bulletbilltime rambling#ok I promise I won't keep making political posts but this is a sore point for me#we as a people seriously need to start being more critical of the ways in which the world around us is pushing us to be outraged#and especially how we're motivated to share the thing that outraged us#bigots are popular on social media because they get people to share them from being mad at them#I'm just as guilty of this don't get me wrong#but also like... so many of these alt-right grifters are banking on people talking about them#the more ppl talk about them the more reach they have#if you spread their bigotry even in the spirit of dunking on it#you are giving their bigotry a platform and it will reach ppl it couldn't reach before#you are literally helping them break into a new audience#'oh but my audience knows I'm a leftist!' it doesn't matter#every time you share someone's reactionary takes it's one more node on the tree of reach that it has#and it's more likely it will reach the people who are more susceptible to their messaging#dunking posts in water on tumblr is like... a start at least in signaling that the take is bullshit#but idk I feel like we can do better#we do need to discuss and disarm the stupid takes but your clapback meme won't do it.#in fact memes and clapbacks as a whole are a godawful way of educating people#we need proper dialogues not fucking debates#unfortunately on a national level this is probably not gonna change bc the news love their controversial topics. it gets views.#so we need to at least start refusing to platform them in our own spaces at the very least#just. stop sharing the bigot. you'll live.#AND FOR FUCK'S SAKE DON'T TURN THEIR RACISM INTO A FUCKING MEME#yes this is about the haitian quote. yes if you are non-haitian and made jokes about haitians eating cats or dogs you did racism.#it isn't okay just bc you did it ironically#AND YOU ARE PLATFORMING RACISM ANYWAY SO WHAT THE FUCK#I am going to grab all of you fuckers and shake you around like snowglobes until you get this through your thick skulls#the post is stored in the tags#I hope social media explodes
1 note
·
View note
Text
When I was working at the sex shop I was pulling poverty wages. I loved my job but I was on food stamps and still barely getting by. When they hired the stores first male employee and he started at my pay rate after I’d been there for three years I quit.
I was initially really nervous when I saw the post for the mattress job. It listed a pay scale that I couldn’t even conceptualize and I appeared qualified. When I got an interview I was over the moon but also petrified. Reactions to my line of work often varied but most people were very embarrassed or skeptical. I worried about how I’d address it in the actual interview.
I lived far to the north of their headquarters and drove almost two hours to get there. When I finally arrived it was in the nicest thrift store clothes I could find, but I shrank inside to see a room full of older white men in nice suits waiting to be interviewed for the same job.
Why did I bother? I was decades younger than anyone else in the room, shabbily dressed, and I suspected I was the only afab person in the entire building. I stewed in my insecurities until I was called in.
The second I met my interviewer I was instantly put at ease. The man had the energy of a therapy dog, he was abound with positive, good natured energy. He was also incredibly beautiful. I grinned back at his welcoming smile as we said our pleasantries. But still. This very beautiful polished man seemed very innocent. How would the sex shop question go?
“I see here you worked at STORE?”
“Yes,” I said hesitantly.
“And that was sales? Or you just rang people up.”
“No, it was sales. I’d help people find products, we were encouraged to upsell, there was sales spiffs, and most importantly we educated customers on products to help them find what they liked best.”
He grinned approvingly and asked, “Can you give me an example of a time you successfully upsold a customer?”
I paused, wringing my hands before I asked, “How vague would you like me to be…?”
“Not at all!” He assured me. “Go for it!”
“Well. A man came in looking for something to make his fingers vibrate so when he was touching his wife it would enhance that sensation. We had cheap $10 cockrings that I showed him first. But we had a rechargeable waterproof one made of nicer material, and after I showed him a demo he bought that one.”
“How much was that one?”
“$110”
“Wow! You had an upsell of 100% from what he came in looking for! That’s incredible!”
He was so truly genuinely stoked and not at all embarrassed that for the first time I saw a tiny glimmer of a future where I didn’t have ramen and peanut butter tiding me over between paychecks.
He asked me to wait then came back to tell me he liked me so much that he wanted to send me right into another interview, if that was okay. He didn’t want me to have to drive back later, it was terribly considerate and exciting. I beamed and told him it would be lovely.
I then had the second worst interview I’ve ever had. The worst goes to the time I applied to be a store manager for a pet food place years later. The district and store manager interviewing me passed notes and texted while I was speaking. When the district manager called to inform me I didn’t get the job I told him I’d never have accepted anyway because I’d never had such a disrespectful interview.
The new man sitting behind the desk radiated an aura of a brick wall. As someone with anxiety I’m highly keyed into the emotional states of people I’m talking to. To receive no feedback at all was my personal hell. After a perfunctory greeting he asked me with no inflection to sell him a pen.
I gathered the shreds of my courage and attempted the Herculean task he’d set me. Through my whole improvised spiel he resisted all attempts at engaging him, regarding me with a cold apathy as I touted the benefits of my fictitious pen.
Halfway through I broke into a cold sweat. My smile didn’t waver but it grew strained as I projected friendliness and warmth into the black hole of his heart. My thoughts scattered and my sales pitch grew redundant in the face of his nothingness. I finally concluded with a hard close and he simply nodded.
He glanced at my resume and commented, “You didn’t ask me to touch or hold it. Though I suppose I can understand from your previous line of work why you wouldn’t.” I shriveled and died inside knowing that I encouraged people to touch dildos all day long and had been too frazzled to offer him the pen.
He bid me a cool farewell. I made it to my car before I started sobbing. I had never been so rattled. I couldn’t understand what I’d done to make him so unfriendly or if my threadbare clothes were what had made him treat me like dirt. I drove an hour and a half to get home, weeping intermittently.
I was therefore taken by complete surprise to receive a call the next day inviting me on board for their five week training program. The first man who’d interviewed me gushed on the phone about how the second guy had loved me and that I was going to be fantastic.
I was in shock. When I showed up to training the second interviewer was charming my new classmates, beaming and laughing. He was an utterly different person. To my dismay I learned he was the trainer for my district and would be my point of contact if I made it through training.
He joked with me later that his interview facade was just a tactic to see how people held up under pressure and I filed him into a category of my deepest enmity. I never forgave him for how small he made me feel that day, but I never showed him the depths of my fury.
I aced every test and went on to be valedictorian of the eight people who had survived the rigorous training process to earn a sales position. When I got my first paycheck I bought myself new clothes, the first non-thrifted things I’d owned in years.
19K notes
·
View notes