#years at work i wouldve fully lost my marbles. my brain wouldve been grinded to absolute dust.

[bogkeep]

i know i know, i keep writing posts about Stories and Diversity of Narratives, i know it's all very abstract, i know most of my posts boil down to the same kernel of thought. but the community of this site was built on love for stories and flinging thoughts into the void and that's a tradition i'm willing to honor any hour of the day. only i can stop me. i've been bringing up my own story preferences and habits a lot recently, such as what videogames i won't play, or how i don't want to be stuck only reading books from the same single author for too long at a time. anyway i think there's a lot of overlap between story habits and food habits. i am aware food as an analogy have been done so many times, but we all have a relationship to food in some way or other, so it keeps being a useful one. i think stories, in whatever form they may come, are a presence in everyone's lives as well. maybe your physical vessel won't die of story starvation, but it's important to feed your soul too, you know? here's what i believe about food: nobody has a right to dictate what you eat. (yes, yes, if you want to be contrarian about that statement you could make an argument for doctors only letting you eat jello and soup after a surgery or something. exceptions are a rule of the world. i'll let that one pass.) there's many factors that contribute to our eating habits. what we like and don't like, allergies and other dietary restrictions, textures, time to cook, time to consume, resources, availability, ability, knowledge, culture, disorders, personal ethics. the list goes ON. other people looove to tell you what you 'should' or 'shouldn't' eat, looove to tell you about what you should do with your body and your time. but they have no right to. they don't know your own body better than yourself. they don't know your history. they might not know what eating disorders you have struggled with, what textures make you gag, where you can afford to shop, if you were never taught how to cook, if you work long hours with almost no left over time and energy to meal prep, or if you're confined to a space where all the tools at your disposal is a microwave and an electric kettle. we live in a society, huh. what works for one human being among seven billion will not work the same for everyone else. i'm not saying you should never change your habits, or that a licensed dietician can't give you good tools and advice, or that you can't learn cooking skills from youtube! what i'm saying is that it's a very individual journey. even at larger events where the dinner is communal - it may open up with "so here's the regular food. here is the vegetarian alternative. here is the vegetarian alternative to the vegetarian who is allergic to soy AND ONLY THAT ONE PERSON IS ALLOWED TO TAKE ANY OF THAT, MIND THE LABELS. here are the gluten free burger buns. please enjoy the meal" and even then i help someone next to me in the queue with scooping salad onto their plate because their sensory issues make it hard for them to touch metal cutlery. you don't actually owe anyone the performance of "health". eating something is always, always ALWAYS going to be better than eathing nothing. it's infinitely more important to eat what you are able to eat than whatever reasons someone (even you) might have for denying your body the sustenance and resources it needs. and if eating what you Can is step one, eating what you Enjoy is step two. you're allowed to eat things you like actually. you are allowed to take joy in meals. you're alive and you are keeping yourself alive and you are alive right now. you don't deserve to punish yourself over it. ... i was talking about stories, right? when it comes to food, it IS generally agreed upon that the most advantageous thing to do is to eat a variety of foods. your body needs many different nutrients, after all, and you will most often obtain these just by Eating Stuff. i think the same goes for Stories. stories come in so many different forms and do so many different things for us. they entertain, make us laugh, make us cry,

bring us catharsis, bring us understanding, bring us perspective, bring us joy. not every story can do all of this for every person, nor should it. some forms of stories are like popcorn for the brain, tasty and easy to consume. some are like a comforting burger, it's not haute cousine, but it's good and uncomplicated and fills you up just right. some stories are a full three course meal and you will remember the experience for a long time afterwards. some meals are best enjoyed with company. i'm sure we've all seen the phrase "read another book"/"watch another show" by now. i guess i'm of two minds on it - because variety in soul food is a good thing, but also, as i've spent like five paragraphs establishing - i don't know your dietary restrictions. i can't know what sustains you better than you do. but also, i DO think a lot of people are trying to draw specific nutrients out of a meal that does not have them. because it can't have all of them. it's not reasonable to expect one story to contain every trope and respectful representation in the world. you can cook the same ingredient a thousand ways, i'm sure, and if that's what you want - go for it! your homecooking sounds delicious. but if you find that the steakhouse you frequent has a lousy vegetarian menu, maybe it's time to try a new place. god i know going to a new place is so intimidating sometimes, and it's always so hard to know what you'll like before you try - i don't want to disclose how many times i've spent leafing through a menu for thirty minutes before ordering something that turns out to be too spicy for me. it's a curse, i think. i love my mother's cooking and she's always been surprisingly accomodating of my food preferences. ever since i've moved out, i love to come over for dinner - it's always a good meal by someone who has honed that skill for years and has access to a fully stocked kitchen. being responsible for my own meals can be sucky sometimes, food costs so much money and i have to do so much planning, but it's also been incredibly empowering. i can eat what i want! i don't HAVE to eat foods i don't like! i can try foods i've always been interested in but never gotten to try before! i can spend a little extra on the fancy bread from the bougie store because life is too short to eat shitty bread that i never look forward to eating!! THE INDEPENDENCE IS GOING TO MY HEAD. i haven't felt such a rush of power since i realized i don't have to finish books or shows that aren't enjoyable for me anymore. i don't want to namedrop any specific franchises but just as life is too short to eat bland bread, i don't HAVE to go watch the big blockbusters if i'm not axctually interested. maybe i'm sick of toast actually. i crave some rye. i can get some rye instead. maybe the analogy isn't perfect. maybe stories aren't food. but i fully believe nobody but you gets to dictate what stories sustain the skeleton of your souls.