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adelior · 3 years

Text

Name: Unconditionally

Author: R. Adelio

Genre: Romance, Minecraft, Comedy, Fluff

Main Lead: Technoblade, Dreamwastaken

Female Lead: Reader

Chapter: 1

Special Addition: Tchnomaid

Letters: 10,718

<- ->

"I'm bored" You mumbled into your palm as you kept your gaze on the papers that were set up in front of you. "It's your fault for trespassing their area, [Name]. You should know by now how strict Dream is with the boundaries of the countries." Wilbur interpreted, his brows furrowing by the second. "They could have killed you."

"I'm sorry, I was just curious" Hearing you apologize, he softened up and groaned. Wil patted your shoulder with a somewhat forced smile before leaving the room. "Make sure to finish brewing the potions by the end of the day. For now," He looked back, nodding his head. "I'll see you around, [Name]."

"You too, Wil" Sighing, you turned to look at the blonde-haired boy who stood awkwardly in the corner. "Well uh, that went well at least!" Slamming your first, you startled Tommy as he shrieked. "I got in trouble in YOUR PLACE-"

"Yeahhhh, about that, I'm sorry!" Tommy shook you by the shoulders, a grin spreading across his face. "I'll make it up to you okay? I'll set you up on a date with Wilbur if it makes you feel any better" Your cheeks darkened, giving the kid a pathetic slap as you covered the bottom half of your face.

"It's really nothing like that. I don't.. like him.." The last part of your sentence was muttered, and as usual, the boy who knew of your feelings let out a hollering laugh. "I knew it! Who would have fucking thought that you'd fall for Wil! Out of all people!"

"LOOK-" You turned to face him, your face getting hotter and hotter the more you thought about it. "I have my reasons okay! He's a good guy, and on top of that, he's an amazing friend"

"An amazing friend you say? He's also one hell of a fucking leader that's for sure. But enough about your crush let's go out and play with Tubbo!" Dismissing him with a single wave, you gave your best sympathetic smile. "Sorry Tommy, but I have to finish brewing these potions by the end of the day. I can't afford to be disciplined by Wil again"

"Hm, whatever, fine" The boy shrugged, leaving you alone. "THIS ISN'T THE END WOMAN! You will join me and Tubbo on our conquest sooner or later!" You chuckled, smiling at his childish behavior. "Yeah, yeah, now go on and have fun"

You can hear him shout out loud, laughing as he tackled what you perceive to be Tubbo. "I never wanna leave" The sentence that slipped out of your mouth caught you off guard. Despite being an outsider to their nation, they treated you with respect and saw you as a member of their group.

Sitting back down, you continued to flip through the pages of the book. Studying the recipes and applying the specific ingredients to each bottle. "Oh shit, I ran out of spider eyes" Cursing, you stood up to walk towards the door, looking out into the hallway. "Niki!" You shouted from your office, capturing the woman's attention. "Yes, [Name]?"

"Do you know if we have any spider eyes left in the chest room? Or have we completely run out of it" She pondered for a second, answering once she finished checking her inventory. "I don't think we have any more spider eyes. I'm also not carrying any with me sadly"

"Oh, that's alright. I can just outside and kill some spiders myself" Pushing yourself forward to one of your chests, you opened it and took some resources. A bow, 10 arrows, and full iron armor apart from your golden shoes. "[Name], you don't need to go out and kill some on your own. It's dangerous at night"

"Exactly, which is why I plan to go to the Piglin market to trade some gold for a few stacks of spider eyes" Niki shook her head in denial, refusing to let you pass by. "That's even more dangerous! We're humans, we can't go inside there unless we have the King's permission. And usually, we'd have knightly escorts to go around with us"

"True, but I can slip in and slip out without being noticed" You shrugged on your hood, a robe that covered your full body apart from your face. "I can hide with this, besides if they aren't able to tell that I'm human they'll never be able to report it to the king"

"Al..right.." The short-haired girl had a troubled expression on her face, but nevertheless, let you pass. "Good luck! Please come home safely" You turned to give her a single nod, a reassuring smile that was enough to calm her down. "I promise, so don't worry about me okay?"

And so you left, walking to the basement of your home where the Nether Portal stood tall. You gulped at the mere sight of it, how mysterious yet alluring. The purple particles only making it look majestic. "beautiful.." You muttered as you slowly entered, the change of temperature really hit you hard. It was hot, humid compared to how it felt in the overworld. "Goddamn how do piglins live like this"

"Shocking, right?" A male voice erupted from the silence, causing you to stiffen. "I'm assuming you're not used to traveling to the Nether." You slowly turned around, only to be met with a man with dirty blonde hair. "Pardon?" You tilted your head, staring at his smiling mask. "Nothing, would you like me to escort you and keep you safe?"

"And what makes you think I'd trust a stranger" You questioned, earning a chuckle from the man. "You're not as dumb as you look. But don't worry you're not my type, I won't do anything."

"WH-" His hand went over your mouth in a flash, he moves fast for a person with netherite armor, and on top of that a black robe. "Keep your voice down, first rule when entering the Nether World is to never bring unnecessary attention to yourself."

"Got it" Your voice was muffled from his large hand, he stepped back before leading the way, making sure that you were tailing right behind him. "The second rule, make sure to always be with somebody. Never travel alone or you'll die in an instant without somebody keeping you safe."

"Safe? Is the Nether really dangerous for you to say that?" Observing his reaction, you realized how sharp his jawline was. You can't peak through the mask but his mouth was fully exposed. "Yes, I take it you've never looked into this dimension?"

"Well, to be fair I've only heard of the Nether. This is my first time actually setting foot into the portal" The man's mouth pulled back into a dumbfounded snarl, almost as if he was silently judging you for your actions. "Weird." Was all he said before nudging you forward. "We're here, keep your guard up. What are you here for exactly?"

"I'm here to trade gold for a few stacks of spider eyes" He sighed, pulling your hood closer to your face. "You do realize you could have killed a few spiders in the overworld without having to come here."

"Uh, not really the best in combat you see" You admitted, darting your attention to the passing piglings who stood at least 5 feet taller than the man leading the way. Their species were large and brute compared to humans, they were cool but dangerous to interact with. "What the hell were you thinking when you decided to come here without somebody to guide you."

"I honestly have no clue" You stared at the man with a blank face, earning a disappointed grunt from him. "Well, turn around Princess because we just arrived at the Mob looting store. Stay out here, I'll get the eyes for you."

"Wait a second- I feel bad you're the one who led me here and protected me-" The man that accompanied you patted your head with one of the most genuine smiles you've ever seen. Despite him being awfully mysterious, he has shown nothing but kindness all throughout your journey. "Don't worry about it. Just stay here and don't run off anywhere. It's even more dangerous inside because piglins tend to fight over items."

Fidgeting with your hands, you finally agreed. The blonde took that as an agreement and stepped into the store. You were left to stay outside, leaning against the wall that was nearest to the door. A few seconds passed, and yet you were still outside waiting. You were beginning to think that the man who you walked with abandoned you.

"Ex..c.." A piglin with long pink hair muttered, his hand reaching for you. "Excu.." You stepped aside, worried that the mob was here to harm you. The more you stared at him the more you realized he was one of them, but one that looked more human. "Is there something you need?" You questioned the man, earning a nod. "What is it?"

"Do you.. Do-" Before he was able to finish his sentence, your eyes widened in realization. You swung your right hand to open your inventory, taking out a gold bar to hand over to him. 'I heard piglins liked gold, maybe he'll leave me alone if I gave him one' Was what you thought as you urged the hybrid to take it.

He looked at you back and forth, debating whether or not he should accept it. "Take it, it's alright I have plenty of where that came from" The man in front of you hesitantly took the gold into his hands, his eyes widening when he realized how shiny and well kept the item was.

"You..-"

"Hey." The man who accompanied you shouted once he exited the shop, pulling out his netherite sword. "Back off."

"Hey wait! He didn't do anything wrong, leave him be" You pushed the blonde male back slightly, apologizing to the other person with a forced smile. "Let's just head back before we get caught!" Turning around, you tangled your fingers with his and ran away, waving the piglin goodbye.

"What are you doing." He asked, narrowing his eyes from under the mask. "You said to keep attention away from us so I am-"

"I wasn't even that loud." You turned to glare at him. "It got a lot of people's attention" The man laughed, swooping you into his arms, and began to speed up his pace. "You're a good listener." He complimented, a smile fighting to break through his irritated expression.

It took time for the two of you to finally reach the same Nether portal from before. The blonde slowly lowered you onto your feet, handing the bag of spider eyes into your chest. "Here, it's heavy so make sure to hold it with both hands."

"Thank you.." You muttered, gladly taking the bag with a smile. "Say, um.. I never caught your name?" Before the man was able to walk away, he turned to look at you one last time before telling you his name. "Clay, the name's clay."

"Clay?"

"I'll see you around." With that, he pushed you into the portal. You fell onto your back once you were transported over to the overworld, lying there with staggering breaths. "I never got to tell him my name though" But once you sat up, the Nether Portal's liquid-like wall disappeared. The particles were being sucked into the middle, and the doorway to hell was disappearing.

"What the..-"

"[NAME!]" You hear your name being called out by what sounds to be Wilbur. Turning to look over your shoulder, you see the whole group running towards you with a worrying expression. "You're back!"

<- ->

ec: @quacobs (instagram)

#mcyt x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #technoblade x reader

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twst-campos13 · 4 years

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ANWHWHAHHAHAH YEAHHHH NONBINARY/MALE FOCUSED BLOG THIS IS EVERYTHING IVE WANTED UR SO POGGERS!! can i have an agender reader who’s dating vil where he gets turned into a catboy? you can choose whatever format you like! congrats on the new blog; i cant stress how happy i am to see a blog like this!

Hi mac!! thank you for visiting my blog!! here’s your request >:0!! I hope you enjoy it! (some commentary in the notes!)

Warnings: mild language! Tags: agender reader, catboy Vil, fluff!

Simply put it, Professor Crewel assigned his class to perfect an animal shifting potion for the authentic assessment. Something as advanced as this could not be perfected without any assistance, so of course, you approached the person that you know excelled in this area.

At first, Vil Schoenheit declined. “There is a reason why Professor Crewel strictly assigned it as an individual assessment, potato,” Vil Schoenheit said with a certain amusement in his tone despite his stoic features. You pouted, tugging on his hand and pleading to help you with this assessment. Eventually he gave in but only on one condition: he will only be assisting you and that is final as you should be the one doing most of the work. If Vil is helping you, then that is enough for you.

After a grueling 6 hours later, you have reached the near end of your potion brewing. The potion that was mildly viscous and muddy turned smooth and dappled white in color. It smells mildly pungent however, a contrast to the clean appearance of the potion. Even Vil's nose scrunched at the smell. "Lovely," he commented.

"This means it worked right?" You asked, looking down at the swirling liquid and watching a few bubbles rapidly pop at the surface. You would need to simmer it for a few more minutes before taking it off the heat and cooling. Vil studied the simmering brew. "An animal shifting potion's appearance vary from color and smell based on what animal you wish to transform into," he said. "I would not conclude its success without testing it."

You looked at him innocently. "Will you drink it for me then?"

You nearly laugh when his face slightly contorts to disbelief. "I came with you as an assistant, not a test subject." Vil planted his hands firmly on his waist. "What reason do you have to not consume it yourself?"

You remembered a mundane ingredient added to the potion. "I'm allergic to nutmeg," you answered.

You were not allergic to nutmeg.

Vil squinted his eyes at you and you smiled. Sighing with a roll of his eyes, he takes out a small kit from his bag. It was a rectangular mahogany box, varnished, with intricate gold borders. Inside were empty vials and flasks with nameless labels. "Fine. But I will not be drinking straight from a beaker. That is highly dangerous and unethical."

"Ace and Grim did it once or twice." Your queen looked at you with a certain judgement behind his goggles. "You often forget that I am different from them, darling," Vil stated.

Your eyes looked back and forth on your notes and your boyfriend. His skin became noticeably paler and he was visibly perspiring. Once you identified the obvious signs of discomfort, you knew the potion was taking effect. Vil was quick to unbutton his lab coat—and suddenly you remembered that you still have an ounce of decency left and turned away. You bit the inside of your cheek as excitement bubbled at the pit of your stomach. You were excited about two things: one, being that you may have successfully brewed an animal shifting potion; and two, you get to see Vil Schoenheit turn into a cute little furball—

You...did not expect his voice to exasperatedly purr your name.

Startled, you turned around—forgetting the moments before that was disrobing himself; he must be covered in fur somehow—and became even more startled that you nearly elbowed nearby equipment. You gaped at him, words failing to form out of your mouth and instead stammering gibberish that soon turned into a single, coherent, verbal reaction.

"Holy fuck."

"How eloquent," Vil snide sarcastically, his tail—holy fuck it's so big and fluffy—swaying behind him.

You tried not to—but you did—took note of his partially disheveled appearance. His lab coat and goggles were neatly placed on the table. His pants were slightly hung loose around his waist and a few buttons of his shirt collar were undone, exposing the dip of his neck. Both of you were expecting at least some fur to cover his skin, but alas, there was none.

Instead, a pair of fluffy ears twitched atop his head, and a tail nearly round and fashioned from the clouds, soft around the edges and puffed up like a squirrel's. But Vil did not turn into a squirrel. He turned into a minuet cat. Half-cat. You turned Vil into a catboy. It seems the potion did not work in a way you were expecting it to.

"I don't understand," was all you could say. Vil scoffed. "Now you speak after ogling at me?" He raised a brow, tail flicking behind him at a sudden intonation. You noticed that his manner of speaking changed a little. If he was elegant before he is certainly more elegant now. Like...a domesticated cat that perfected etiquette lessons.

"I wasn't ogling—I was just staring, surprised," you corrected, despite the heat at the tip of your ears. Vil hummed—purred—and his eyes narrowed at you. "Ogling and staring are two very similar things, darling."

You question if he is purring on purpose. Every syllable at the end of his sentence ended with a smooth purr. Maybe, you thought, it is just an adverse effect of the potion.

So, you tried retracing your steps. Where did it possibly went wrong? All ingredients were measured carefully, weighed even, and you made sure to be precise in stirring—

"Darling." You jumped a little from your thoughts. When did Vil get so close to you? "You are standing there like a sprouted potato," he said, eyes peering at you. "Have you figured out where you went wrong?"

"I was getting there," you muttered, eyes glancing at his tail again. You wondered how soft it would be if you run your fingers across the fur. Can a cat's tail reach that level of fluff? Now you wonder about his ears...would they be as soft as they look? If you touch it—pet it—would he like it? Will he lean more to your touch like a cat asking for more affection? Would he—

You froze when your chin was lifted. Your entire face flared at the intimate gesture. "It seems you would rather focus elsewhere than pinpoint your misstep..." he purred. There was a hint of teasing in his tone. You swallowed. "I mean, this—" you gestured at him vaguely "—this is new." You lightly chuckled, trying to calm yourself down. You cannot even meet your boyfriend's eyes from how intense he is staring at you. Vil's fingers remained curled under your chin. Light, but noticeable.

"And what do you plan on doing?"

His fingers moved on from your chin and slid behind your neck to fiddle with the hem of your back collar. Now he is starting to act like a curious cat.

"W-Well if I plan on reversing the effects then that means I have to properly observe this result of the potion first," you mumbled, not fighting the smile that draws from your lips. Something about this scene seemed affectionate. Vil chuckled, and you did not miss the way his lips tugged into a slight smirk. "Is that what you are suggesting to do? To observe?"

You do not miss the flirtatious tone in his voice, either. "Don't make it sound weird, Vil..." you muttered, and he laughed at your probably pouty face. A laugh that is soft and quiet. His hand slid past your shoulder and he sat down on his chair. He leaned back with his legs crossed. His tail idly swayed back and forth behind him as his ears twitched with interest. His plum-purple eyes beckoned you, as do his inviting purr.

"Well, your assessment is not finished yet, yes? Go on. Observe me."

#fullcowling #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twst #vil schoenheit #twisted wonderland vil schoenheit #catboy vil #twst vil schoenheit #vil schoenheit x reader #listen #i know a lot of writing blogs already accepts fem reader or fem hcs #and thats okay! to each their own!!#i havent seen a male/nb focused blog before and i want to do that #ALSO this took like three rewrites #solely because im wondering how long a scenario should be????#ajfefaejfeg????#yeah thats ots akjfaefa #tw mild language

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whatiwillsay · 4 years

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how do you interpret clean? i can still see some k words using the song as a "proof" to push the "dianna is toxic" narrative

yeahhhh anyone saying clean is about a toxic relationship is...just...not listening to the music?

let’s do an analysis because when you read the song taylor is more commenting on her moving on process than anything else

The drought was the very worst, ah ah When the flowers that we'd grown together died of thirst It was months, and months of back and forth, ah ah

^sounds like the painful end to relationship but it’s not blaming anyone, it’s not saying “you hurt me brutally” or anything just “it was tough ending it with you”

You're still all over me like a wine-stained dress I can't wear anymore

^i see cringy people call dianna “a stain” when they try to insult her which is laughable to me because literally what taylor is saying here is “i’m not entirely past what we went through, you’re still a part of me, but i need to be over it, because it’s run its course” - literally doesn’t say anything negative about the other person just taylor commenting how hard but necessary it is to move on from them

Hung my head, as I lost the war, and the sky turned black like a perfect storm Rain came pouring down when I was drowning That's when I could finally breathe And by morning, gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean ^this just reads like first general sadness and pain ab the end of a relationship(storms and rain and drowning) and then after mourning it properly feeling ready to move on There was nothing left to do, ah ah When the butterflies turned to dust, they covered my whole room So I punched a hole in the roof, ah ah Let the flood carry away all my pictures of you The water filled my lungs, I screamed so loud but no one heard a thing ^again this is just personal stuff about moving on...she’s not saying a singular negative thing about the person she’s moving on from just talking about her that process and what it’s like to mourn the loss of a relationship

Ten months sober, I must admit ^this line is just interesting because when she wrote this song she had been broken up with harry for a little over 13 months (but she had been outed with dianna ten months before this) so that’s just a nice little swiftgron clue ***Just because you're clean don't mean you don't miss it***

^this is the line y’all should be paying attention to...it is so gentle and wistful and sweet. this is Taylor “should’ve said no” “better than revenge” Swift - she👏does👏not👏pull👏punches👏. if you hurt her she will let you know ab it. so the fact that even in this vulnerable beautiful song about moving on and self-love she takes a moment to say...yeah...i’m moving on...but i miss you (and low key i’ll always care about you) is the thing y’all should be paying attention to.

the rest of the lyrics are generally more of the same

also, study the music theory of the song...it’s in a major key, gentle with not much in the way of percussion, the synths are not like the storm described in the song but more like a light pitter-patter of warm summer rain, the vocals are laced with regret but still are light and almost sweet. she does not sound scornful or spiteful or bitter at all. compare this to songs like haunted, dear john, hoax, should’ve said no, you’re not sorry and note the differences...taylor is not angry at the person clean is about.

this song makes pretty much NO COMMENT on the relationship taylor is moving on from and instead is an exploration of taylor’s personal mourning and healing process by way of metaphors to do nature such as flowers, rain, storms, droughts, and butterflies

anyway yeah anyone who says clean is about the end to a toxic relationship i have to imagine has just never listened to the song??? idk that’s the only explanation that makes sense to me🤷‍♀️

#swiftgron #clean #kaylor #gaylor swift #1989 #analysis #Anonymous #songs about dianna tag

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writeiolite · 4 years

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Hello! I don’t know if your requests are open, so if they aren’t please ignore this ^^ I saw a bunch of your Kuroo writes, and I love them..! I was wondering if you could do Ushujima going to there s/o hockey game to surprise them? Since they always go to his games. Sorry if it’s to much, 😅 Hope you have a good day!💖

hockey hooky

who: ushijima x gn!reader

what: fluff

plot: ushijima makes it to ur hockey games. until now

wc: 733

You think long and hard about it — the question wasn’t one you were expecting nor was it one that you really thought about anyway.

“The last time Ushijima came to a game… I think it was probably last year.”

“LAST YEAR?”

“Y/N!”

“Leave the guy already!”

Your friends don’t look too pleased with your answer, but you definitely can’t listen to theirs.

“He’s busy,” you stress, “so he can’t come to our games all the time.”

“That’s practically never, Y/N. Don’t be so relaxed about this!”

Were your friends right? Should you take it a bit more seriously? It’s not Ushijima’s fault that he can’t attend your games — he has his own to go to and he has a lot of practice days and intense workouts most of the time. You’ve never faulted him for it in the past but maybe you should bring it up to him. After all, you always go to his games — there isn’t a single game of his that you’ve missed since before you started dating almost two years ago.

“Your game is this weekend?” he asks quietly, eyes lingering on his homework for a bit before he finally looks up at you.

You decided to visit his classroom during lunch, but it seems even during his break time he’s working. Stupid! You can’t ask him to come to your game. He still has to catch up on his homework too.

“Y-yeahhhh, wish me luck!”

He looks at you without his expression changing, but you know that glint of skepticism anywhere. You’re probably not convincing him at all.

“Good luck, Y/N,” he tells you, taking the chair beside him and pulling it closer to him. “Are you going to sit and eat lunch with me?”

You nod strongly, having no other excuse. You can eat your worries away and hope he forgets about it too.

But you already should’ve known that Ushijima is probably the most attentive person you’ve ever known. He may not speak up on things, but that doesn’t mean it goes unnoticed by him. After your practice, you overheard some of your underclassmen teammates gushing about their crushes promising to come to the first game of the tournament season.

Am I jealous? No… Don’t be that silly.

“What’s wrong?”

You almost crashed right into him. Looking up, you see Ushijima, a towel around his neck and his practice clothes on.

I guess he decided to wait for me after his practice, huh? “Nothing! I’m just beat. Wanna get popsicles on the way home?”

“If that’ll make you feel better, yeah.” He studies you before glancing at your teammates shortly. You don’t notice, though, already walking ahead of him toward your usual convenience store for a sweet treat. Worrying right before a tournament will only make your performance worse — you can’t afford to think of such trivial things. Hockey wasn’t a sport you picked up so that you could get attention — you picked it because you love it. And you started dating Ushijima because you love him. The losses that come with both are losses you’re willing to accept if it means getting to have double the happiness.

And double the happiness is exactly what you get during the first tournament game when you hear someone cheering your name at the very end from the stands. When you look over, you’re surprised to see Goshiki waving frantically at you with the biggest Chesire grin on his face. It’s a happy surprise, but it’s not the best one.

Beside him is someone you weren’t expecting at all, but just the feeling of seeing him there makes you wish you could repeat the game over and over. You even try to blink away the image of him, not believing that he’s really there even as he waves to you with a smirk on his face.

“Wakatoshi? What are you doing here? I thought you guys had practice or something?” you ask while approaching the two of them.

“Ushijima didn’t want to miss out on your game so he managed to have practice cut short,” Goshiki lies proudly. Ushijima nods along, his cheeks going slightly rosy.

“Y/N,” he starts, “I’m sorry for not being at your previous games. But I promise I’ll-”

“Less talking, more hugs and kisses or something — we gotta celebrate!”

His cheeks only grow pinker, but his heart grows fonder.

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fredweesleyismyslut · 4 years

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A/N: Hey, guys!!! I wrote this up out of boredom at like midnight because I was watching Supernatural so if it’s not great I’m sorry but also not sorry this is what I wrote and I’m gonna be proud of it even if it sucks. Anywho, besides the very contradictory sentence that is coming out of my mouth because it’s 12am again(why am I always writing at midnight?) and I’m tired so I’ll keep this short and sweet. I hope you guys like this now byeeee I need sleep to be able to continue my reading of developmental psych!!!

You sat up in bed, not able to sleep, as your husband slept softly snoring to your side. You turned to your side, facing him, as you traced the faint scars along his chest. The ones that he had acquired whilst fighting the supernatural. Yes, you heard correctly, your husband, Dean Winchester, fought the supernatural alongside his younger brother Sam.

You two had met while he was on one of his trips. You knew of the supernatural due to your father and therefore of course knew who the Winchester brothers were.

Your father had brought them in since they were working a case together and you sat at the dining table, minding your business, till Dean came over. “What’s a pretty face like you doing here?”

You scoffed as you replied, “Maybe I’m here because I live here…” You pointedly stared into his eyes, “That’s my dad, try anything and I’ll break your hands pretty boy.”

Dean let out a low whistle as he held his hands up in mock surrender, “Yes ma’am. What’s your name or does asking your name qualify as ‘trying something’?” Chuckling under your breath you held your hand out, “Y/n Y/l/n.” He took your hand and before he could reply you cut in, “I already know who you are. The infamous Winchester brothers. I’m assuming you’re Dean since the other one is tall and cute.”

Dean’s face flashed with mock hurt as he replied, “Are you implying that I’m not cute?”

You shook your head, “I’m implying that you’re not cute...but you are definitely handsome.” A smile spread across his face as his eyes glinted with something you couldn’t place. There was something similar to interest along with a great big hole full of despair and loneliness.

“Hey, Dean, we gotta go.” Sam said, walking over as his hair swept in front of his face. He turned to you, “Oh, hey, y/n. Wanna come with?”

You nodded, walking over to link arms casually, “Yup, I’m bored out of my mind. What’s the deal?”

Sam smiled as he ruffled your hair, “We’re not sure yet, but the bodies had bite marks on them and were bled.” You nodded, “Soooo, most likely vampire?” He nodded, “Most likely but there’s just something that doesn’t add up.” “Oh, there you go again, Sammy, rolling that brain again. Sometimes things are just what they are there isn’t always something else.”

Dean was glancing between the two of you, and if it was physically possible his jaw would’ve been all the way on the ground. “Wait, a damn second.” he strolled over, “You two know each other?”

You smiled brightly, “Yeah, we met a couple years ago when he was studying law. I was friends with some of his friends and it’s like we just immediately knew we were both running from something.” Sam nodded, “Been friends since...I thought you knew?”

Dean shook his head profusely, “The hell I didn’t if, I did I would’ve come here a lot more often.”

You laughed head falling back as you slapped Sam’s shoulders, “As if you would’ve even had a chance, Winchester. You’re not my type, too full of it.” You walked over, before stopping inches in front of his face, “I personally would take Sammy here over you any day.”

Dean scoffed as he pulled away, “Whatever...Come on let’s go and you, just don’t get in the way I don’t want to have to save you.” Chuckling you replied, “Don’t worry. I think I’ll be doing all the ass saving.”

And yes, you were indeed correct, you saved him from almost being gutted by vampires and Sam was correct the vampires had something fishy so you continued to follow the leads. Since, then it was history and here you are now sitting in bed with the love of your life, Dean Winchester.

You continued tracing the scars then traced your finger up to his face, running your finger along his jaw as you watched his eyes flutter beneath his eyelids. He looked so peaceful and almost angelic when he was sleeping compared to his constant state of worry during the day where monsters lurked.

You were shaken from your thoughts as Dean grabbed your wrist, voice still laced with sleep, “Bad dream?” he asked, automatically pulled your body close to his, embracing you as if trying to protect you from all that was bad.

Holding his hand close to your heart you fiddled with your wedding ring, “I have to talk to you, Dean.”

He mumbled something incoherent as he leaned his head on your shoulder, “Should I be scared?” he placed a kiss along the nape of your nape, making his way up to your jaw. “It’s serious, if that’s what you mean,” you replied, trying to hold your fears away. “Uh oh what’d I do? Is it because I ate all the pie, I said I was sorry.”

He seemed more awake now, but still groggy, as you turned around to face him, placing your hand on his jaw. “We need to talk, Dean.”

This seemed to completely shake him from his sleepy state as he took your hand and kissed your knuckles. “Seriously, sweetheart, you’re scaring me. What’s wrong?” His eyes stared into yours, looking for in an answer, from fright.

“I-I…” Your voice shook as you took a deep breath in, “I’m pregnant, Dean.”

His eyes stared into yours for a long moment before he smiled wide, as he pulled you into a hug, sheets entangling between your bodies. “You’re not messing with me, right? Oh my god, and everything that’s holy, you’re serious?”

You nodded as he sat up in bed, “Y/n! We’re having a baby!” He shouted, as you slapped his chest, “shhhh you’re gonna wake the neighbors if you’re any louder.” “I don’t care. I’m so happy.” He leaned down as he kissed your forehead, “I can’t believe this. I’m going to have a baby with the love of my life.”

His reaction blew all your worries away, as you took his hand in yours, “Are you seriously happy?” He frowned slightly, in confusion, “Why wouldn’t I be?”

He pushed your hair out of your face as he waited for you to continue, “I don’t know...I just...You know with all that’s going on you and Sam are still quite busy. I-I don’t want to be another one of your worries.” Then you took a deep breath, holding back tears as you prepared yourself, “I also don’t want to worry about you two everyday. I know I can’t tell you to stop but...but I don’t want to see you walk out the door and never come back. I don’t want to raise our kid to be afraid that their dad might not come home the next day. I don’t want to live without you Dean. No, I can’t live without you.”

His eyebrows creased in the middle as he opened his mouth then close it to think of an appropriate response, “You won’t have to have all these worries, honey. I’ll always be here, even if I have to go to hell and back again, I’ll always be here.” He kissed your cheeks before continuing, “I can’t live without you, either, so you have to promise to not go on dangerous cases too. You’re not the only one who’s worried every day. I worry every time you leave the house for a case, I know you’re a badass and you saved my life and everything but...I worry.” You nodded, “So, fewer cases or at least less dangerous cases. Is that the final agreement?” Dean smiled, mockingly holding out his hand, “It’s a deal.” “It’s a deal,” you replied, shaking it mockingly and giving a salute.

Suddenly, Dean’s eyes lit up with excitement, “I’ve gotta tell Sammy. He’s gonna freak out!” Then he finished, “We beat him to having a kid ha!”

Rolling your eyes you slapped his arm, “It’s not a competition you idiot.” “Yeahhhh, but it kinda is,” he said. “Ugh whatever, I’ll call Jody. We know she’ll be so excited she’s probably going to take vacation days just to come to see us so we’re gonna have to prepare the spare bedrooms.” Dean nodded, as he excitedly yelled on the phone, “Sammy! Guess what? You know what don’t guess I’m gonna tell you. We’re having a baby!” His conversation continued with Sam as he excitedly bantered with his brother.

It was good to see him like this, free from stress, happy and not being chased by monsters or in hell, you smiled softly to yourself as you thought, I love you, Winchester. Even if he was a pain in the ass sometimes, he was your pain in the ass.

#dean winchester #dean winchester x y/n #dean winchester x reader #Winchester brothers #supernatural #supernatural x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x reader smut #dean winchester x reader fluff #dean winchester x reader headcanons #supernatural x reader fluff #supernatural x reader smut #supernatural x reader headcanons #supernatural cw

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sunflowerhae · 4 years

Text

->Listen before I go 🎡💒

☾ ♡ ✓

-> Warnings •suicide, suicide attempt, blood and pill overdose, mentions of sex, mentions of cutting

->I just want to say, if you are feeling this way - any way like the characters - please get in touch with someone. People will not be annoyed or mad, just worried and caring, and you will get the help you need and will get better. I hope that this does not trigger anyone in any way, and I sincerely apologize if it does. I hope no one has to identify with either of these characters negatively, but if you do, I will always be here. Message me if you want to, I have gone through similar issues and I may be able to help. I love you all and hope you enjoy 💘

National Suicide Prevention lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

Everyone said it wasn’t his fault. That she had problems, and that no one could have started this, or stopped it.

But Donghyuck couldn’t help but feel completely guilty for this.

He should have known. Seen the signs. She gave him her favorite stuffed animal, and she was so peaceful, after such a long time of stress and absolute despair. She smiled a lot more, laughed, made jokes. Hell, the night before, Donghyuck came over and the two had made love, something they hadn’t done in a while.

Everyone told him they were all signs. That they give their stuff away, that they feel at peace after they have made their decision, knowing it would all be over soon.

Donghyuck remembers the night so clearly in his head, it’s like it just happened. He was studying for a math test he had the next day, when he got a call from her.

“Hey babe! What’s up?” He smiled, thankful to get a break and be able to hear her voice.

“Donghyuck.”

She had sounded so serious. It had chilled Donghyuck to the bone. He sat up in his chair.

“Is everything okay, y/n?”

She sniffled, as if she had been crying.

“Better then okay. Great. I just wanted to say that I love you so much, Donghyuck. So much. And I’m going to miss you so fucking much. But I have to do it, baby. I have to. And I’m not sorry about it. I feel like finally, for the first time in my life, I’m at complete and utter peace. Like when you take a pill and minutes later your bad headache goes away. Well I’ve had a headache all my life, and finally, it’s gone away. Do you get what I’m trying to say?”

Donghyuck was flabbergasted, but acted quick. He was looking up the suicide hot line as she spoke, but he knew he had to keep her on the line for as long as he could.

“No, baby. Could you elaborate a bit more for me? Sorry, haha, slow brain you know?”

“No, Donghyuck. Don’t call the police. I’ll be okay.”

“I’m not calling the police, y/n.”

“I love you to the moon and back Lee Donghyuck.”

And she hung up.

911 didn’t get there in time.

That was the last time Donghyuck ever heard her voice.

Turns out, she had taken every pill in her house, then drawn a nice warm bath, and got in, fully clothed. Her mother found her not long after she had hung up on Donghyuck. Her lips were blue.

The only thing in Donghyucks’ mind, was that she died alone.

He remembered a moment one summer, where they laid in the back of Donghyucks’ truck, and looked at the stars. They got into the conversation of death, and how they wanted to die. Donghyuck had said a major skateboard accident when he was like, 100.

“At peace.” Donghyuck raised his eyebrows at this.

“Elaborate, please?” He was looking at her, but she was looking at the stars.

“I want to be at peace, but I don’t want to be alone. I want to be surrounded by loved ones, having lived a long, full life.”

Donghyuck laughed a little, “and would I be there?”

She finally looked at him.

“Hopefully.”

That was when things were good. When she was, happy.

It had been three months since she passed. The funeral was at church, and Donghyuck sat in the back, with Jeno. He felt that he would breakdown if he went too close. He respectfully stayed silent, but eventually went and hugged y/n’s mother.

She just cried, and said that Donghyuck was “one of those rare things my daughter couldn’t live without. And eventually didn’t.”

Donghyuck ignored that and brushed it off as grieving mother talk. He doesn’t know what would have happened if he didn’t.

It had been three months since Donghyucks’ life went to shit. His friends could see it in him; the sadness. They saw it slowly but surely fill him until that’s all that was there. No human. Just the cold, darkness. Donghyuck didn’t think they fully realized what the relationship meant to him.

He was completely obsessed with her.

Donghyuck didn’t eat, didn’t sleep, didn’t do much. It was in that silence, though, that an idea started to form within him. One so dark and twisted, it would have made y/n herself cry in pain.

Jeno should have been doing something any normal teenager would have done on a Friday night. Go out with his friends, play video games, maybe even homework.

But ever since y/n passed away, Jeno had spent most of his 24 hours in a day with his mother, helping around the house, watching movies with her, going on errands. She named it, he did it.

All Jeno could think about was y/n’s mom at the funeral. How she just sat there, tears falling lifelessly. He couldn’t imagine what she was going through.

He couldn’t imagine what his mom would go through if that was him.

Death made him almost revert back to a child, and he just wanted to hug his mom.

So on a Friday night, Jeno was watching back to the future with his mother, when Donghyuck called.

He told his mom to keep watching, and that he’d only be gone a second.

“Hyuck, what’s up?”

“Jeno.”

Donghyuck’s voice was still, and cold.

“Yeahhhh? Everything good?”

“You have been, such a good friend. And I’ll miss you. So much. And, and I love you, okay? But I think I’ll be at peace finally. And I’ll see her. So I’m not sorry.”

And he hung up.

Jeno knew what was happening, and refused to let that be the last time he heard his best friends voice.

He ran into the living room, and turned off the tv.

“Hey! I was watching that, Jen!”

“Mom, call 911.”

All Donghyuck remembered was blood, at first. Blood on his clothes, on the bathroom wall and floor, and especially on his arms. Then, he got into the warm water. He sat on the opposite side y/n was found at, so he could feel like he was looking at her when he stopped breathing.

He closed his eyes for maybe a millisecond; one little blink. But when he opened them again, all he saw was y/e/c.

All he saw was her.

Sitting in the bathtub with him, facing him, sitting on her knees.

She stared at him, then reached and placed her hands over his cuts, and held his arms.

“Y/n.” He whispered weakly.

“We’re together, finally.”

“Donghyuck, this is not your end.”

“No! I want to be with you!” He sounded drunk, and felt embarrassed, and cold; so cold.

“Donghyuck. You are, always with me. I will never leave you, but you cannot leave, not yet. It’s not your time. What happened to 100 year old skater wipeout?” She laughed a bit.

“Why happened to old age peace with the ones you love?” Donghyucks eyes were closing slowly, and she had to slap him a bit to keep him up.

“I never said anything about old, I said a long full life. And you know what? I lived my own long full life. And hyuck, I felt my loved ones, I never died alone. Never. But you, baby, this isn’t your time. I have seen your time, and it is long from now. You will fall in love again, get married, have kids, and when you are ready, I will be there, waiting to meet you. But right now? Right now I really need you to live. I need to see you live, Donghyuck. I need to see Jeno be the best man at your wedding, I need to see your relationship with my mother grow, and for you to bring her peace until I can too. I need you to do what I couldn’t. For me, baby. I need you to be happy. I need you to live.”

He closed his eyes again, and when he opened them, it was not y/n he was looking at, but the face of an unknown man, asking Donghyuck if he could hear him.

It had been 1 year since she passed, and Donghyuck was feeling better. He had been doing better in his life, once more. He went out with his friends a lot, he smiled, laughed, and joked around even.

He also had a girl he was interested in.

Donghyuck wasn’t fully happy, but he was learning everyday how to further that goal. And he was growing.

Donghyuck, to put it quite simply, was living.

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riskeith · 4 years

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hi bb!

sorry i disappeared for a while, life has been super hectic. i almost screamed when i got the notification where you mentioned me? like holy shit... cluna. 😳 how have you been? i really missed talking to you soo much. i think your finals are done now so how did those go? are you staying healthy and well? ♥️

since i couldn’t rly watch anything bc of university, i haven’t had any time to finish bnha. or well, i have a couple more episodes of season four—the festival arc i believe? what i love the most about this season so far is that we get to see bakugou and todoroki’s dynamic more closely. (aside from getting to know kirishima better he’s my baby) i know those two are your favorites (or well, judging by your fics) so i can totally see why you enjoy them so much, haha. when it comes to the ships in this anime i’m literally up for (almost) Anything. most of them have something that makes them ship-able, and i’ve never been picky about that so i’m just chilling loving everything. what’s your main ships aside todobaku? (if you want to get into that, haha. now that i’ve been in the fandom for a while i get what you meant about the whole fandom situation, yikes.)

you should rewatch lok if you get the chance!! your cousin is absolutely right. being older makes you understand why certain characters do certain things more clearly, which makes the show much more enjoyable imo. and you should continue tdp too.. pls 🥺 the third season is insanely good my jaw was on the floor the whole time and the animation gets much much better.

now that the holidays are rolling around i will absolutely make sure to check in more often, can’t have my wife missing me too much, eh? ;) love u love u love u, super excited to hear back from u.. <3

marriage anon!!!! i’ve missed you hello 🥺😭

ofc.. i’ve been thinking of u hehe 🥰 and i’ve been well! been chilling a LOT and doing nothing but playing genshin all day every day it’s good! how are you? i hope that even tho life has been hectic you’re still finding time for yourself and are staying safe and well too <3

and yep all my exams are over! we don’t get individual results for them but the overall unit results come out tomorrow oh yikes but yeahh hoping for the best! are you free from uni yet? how did your finals go? (what are you studying, if you don’t mind me asking)

festival arc is so fun!! finally some good wholesome content. kirishima is SUCH a good boy yes and such pure values and works so hard.. i like he. but yes todoroki and bakugou are my two faves! it makes me really happy that you like them + their dynamic too 🤩

“so i’m just chilling loving everything” i love that. that’s the best vibe! as for other ships, i don’t mind a lot of them tbh but ones i have also written for before are tododeku, dabihawks, and bakudeku! (yeahhhh that kinda sucks but i hope you’re still able to enjoy yourself at the very least!)

i’ll def keep lok in mind if i ever wanna watch something! a friend actually texted me the other day saying he just finished it for the first time and how good it was so i’m convinced ahaha. and i actually just finished tdp s3!!! i enjoyed it so much there were so many great moments. i absolutely loved the sun elves and rayllum got me teared up AHAHA and also i hate him but.. aaravos hot 😳

you know what they say tho, distance makes the heart grow fonder 😩 but yes that sounds so good! can’t wait to hear back from you *smooches* 💗💖💘💕💗💖💗💘💝💕💓

#marriage anon #wowclunaanswers #long post #we be writing essays y’all :p <3

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officheol · 5 years

Text

Vernon: He Comforts You

Drabble Prompts: #53 “Who cares about what they think?” & #56 “Tell me what’s wrong.”

Pairing: Vernon/F!Reader

WC: 1207

Rating: PG

Content: Fluff, Angst, Non au

Requested: Yes!

Requests: Open!

Summary: Hansol is more intuitive than you think he is and he has no problem reminding you that if you’ve got him, then he’s got you.

Masterlist

As he finishes the day’s practice, Hansol gulps down water and pushes back his sweaty hair. The boys are congratulating each other for a good day’s work while some continue to work on moves they felt they hadn’t perfected. He watches a bit, breathing heavily, before pulling out his phone checking to see what you were up to. Hansol frowns, seeing no notification from you even though he had texted you three hours ago. Usually, he would figure you were busy, caught up with schoolwork, but he had been getting the sense that something was wrong with you for the past week. Especially since you weren’t talking to him as often as you used to.

Trusting his gut, he decides to go straight to your apartment instead of back to the dorms. “Hyungs, I want to check in on Y/N. Sorry, I know it’s risky, but can I go now? I think she needs me,” He calls out to the other members.

Seungcheol stops chatting with Chan, glancing over and frowning slightly. “Is she feeling alright? I guess you can go. Don’t let anyone see you though.” The others nod, picking up on Hansol’s anxiety and telling him to wish you well on their behalves as he picks up his stuff and leaves the building with a manager.

Though the ride was less than half an hour, he couldn’t stop impatiently shaking his leg. He didn’t want to overthink and assume the worst; after all, it could just be a stressful exam you were studying for. It doesn’t matter. Could be a test or could be the drama’s finale she was watching affecting her. Either way, I should be there.

When he finally arrives outside your apartment building, he dashes outside the car and into the lobby. He nods to the security guard working the night shift and strolls to the elevators. Once he gets to your floor and makes his way down the hallway, he pulls out the key you had given him and carefully unlocks and pushes your door open.

“Babe?” His voice rings out in the quiet apartment suite. Hansol notices how dim the lights are in the living room, time seemingly still as if everything in the room is waiting with bated breath. He calls out one more time, walking to your bedroom, when your head pops up from the couch, hair tousled like you just woke up.

“Hansol?” you reply groggily. Startled at the scene before him, Hansol peers closer at the mess of wrappers and tissues surrounding you on the coffee table. Looking at you, he realizes your eyes are red, your fingers rubbing the dryness out of them, and there are tear stains on your cheeks.

“Uh.” He doesn’t know where to begin. “How’s life?”

You wrinkle your nose at him, following his eyes and looking at the mess around you. “How do you think life is going right now?”

He sighs, falling down next to you, “Sorry, didn’t mean it like that. Just surprised is all. What’s going on?” Noting your hesitant expression, he presses on, “You can tell me.”

Stuttering, you respond, “O-oh, well you know how I was r-r-reading that book. And wow, w-what a sad ending. Made me fee-” You cut yourself off when you meet Hansol’s glare.

“Babe,” he enunciates, “Tell me what’s wrong.” He ends on a much softer note, hoping to convince you to talk.

You run a hand through your knotted hair, sitting up straight and wiping your nose on your his sweatshirt’s sleeve. “I-uh, it feels dumb to say it out loud. But, I was thinking of how you’ll probably break up with me soon,” you say matter-of-factly.

Hansol nearly spits. “I’m sorry, what now?”

“Yeahhhh,” you drag out the syllable, “I just realized how different we are. Ya know? I’m a student from another country, studying abroad in Korea. And you’re an idol! Someone who others adore. Someone who is so loved. Someone who deserves to be with someone like t-them,” your voice breaks, pretense falling with it.

It’s quiet for a few moments before Hansol clears his throat. “That’s not true. And I know you know that’s not true. So where did you get this idea from?”

Avoiding his gaze, you mumble out, “Twitter…” His eyes burn into you as you feel your cheeks heat up from the shame. “I know, I know I shouldn’t look, but god the fans talk so often. They don’t even know I exist and it feels like they already hate me!”

“I wish you had told me,” he sighs. “It’s okay to feel like that. Nothin’ to be ashamed of.” He tries to be as coherent as possible. “They won’t hate you. I know they have... expectations of who they’d like me to date, but it doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it matters, Sol! They’re your fans. If they hate me, they could hate you just as easily! And you’re already uncomfortable with being associated as more American than Korean. Can you imagine what they might say to you if they know about me? Things like “you’re even less Korean than you were before” or that you’re “losing” your Korean heritage. I can’t let you get hurt like that. I refuse to,” you cry.

He studies you carefully. “Good, I’m glad you refuse to. I refuse to get hurt by things like that too. After all, who cares about what they think? I know I used to let it bother me. But I’ve got the boys. I’ve got fans who support me without bringing me down. And I’ve got you. That’s what matters.” He embraces you tightly. “So don’t be afraid to tell me things like this next time. Because you’ve got me too.”

You swear your heart almost bursts. “Since when did you get so good with words?” you mutter into his chest.

Hansol laughs, his chest rumbling beneath you. “I’m a rapper, babe. It’s kinda my job.” He pulls you up and rubs his nose with yours and pecks your lips twice, eyes twinkling. “Thought you woulda known that though, based off how many times I’ve walked in and caught you imitating my verses as you dance around the apartment.”

Gaping, you gasp at him, “You knew?!” His cackle fills the room as you yelp. “Why didn’t you tell me? That’s so embarrassing! Oh my god. Oh my god!”

“Why would I tell you? How else was I supposed to get so many videos of you fumbling through my songs? Duh!” He sticks his tongue out. A chill runs through you.

You plead, “Please tell me you never sent them to anyone. Please, please, please.” Hansol shifts his eyes away from you as his lips form a boxy smile.

“Of course not! Nope. Why would any of the members have gotten them?” He backs away as you stare horrified. “Seungkwan saving them? And making a montage? And sharing it with the group chat? Ha haha ha.” He’s not even fighting the amused expression on his face anymore, waiting for your reaction.

Shrieking, you jump up and try to tackle him. He’s much faster though as he runs behind the couch, pulling a gag face and waving his cellphone at you.

“HANSOL VERNON CHWE!”

#hansol scenarios #hansol fluff #hansol fic #hansol drabble #hansol imagines #vernon scenarios #vernon fluff #vernon fic #vernon drabble #vernon imagines #seventeen drabbles #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #my first request!! uwu #liawrites #i rly like this one tbh #i think i did his awkward loving character p well

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bigsnzstanacct · 5 years

Text

Richie Robbins

Here’s my first, totally unfinished sneezefic. It’s all about loud sneezes, I haven’t edited it at all and tbh I found it on some random blog that had clearly grabbed stories from the forum bc I didn’t want to dig through all my old computer backups so ya know if it’s screwed up it’s not my fault.

As passionately as he desired to, he knew he wouldn't be able to evade it. It would come, as so many times before: unavoidable, uncontrollable, unstoppable. He closed his eyes, tilted back his head, let the itch like fire at the edges of his nostrils expand to set his whole nose ablaze with a tickle so strong, only a monstrous explosion could expel it. And monstrous explosions were his stock-in-trade.

"hehh...hehh...HEISSSHOOO!" he exploded. His stunned professor stopped her lecture, as the noise rang out through the huge lecture hall, waking up quite a few drowsy (hungover?) students. Flummoxed, she lost her place in her notes, as the boy sitting next to him, a jock, last name Stevens... first name he couldn't remember, muttered, "Nice one, Robbins. You planning to blow any houses down any time soon?"

Richard Robbins waited a moment before he replied, hoping to make sure the one great sneeze had been enough to expel the full magnitude of the tickly sensation in his nostrils. He sniffed before opening his mouth to reply, which was, as always, a huge mistake.

"Yeah, Ste-st... stevens... I... hah... I...iiegh...ieghhh..ihhh...ihhh..." He thought for a moment he'd gotten it under control, rushing a firm index finger to his quivering nostrils, but it was too little, too late: "Y-yeahhhh... ahhhKESHHHHHuuuhh. HEYY-SHEEUUUUEY!" Another of his roaring sneezes rang out through the room, again startling Doctor Renyolds, who had just managed to get herself composed enough to begin lecturing again. And the sneeze came with a brother, a great screaming affair which appeared to have erupted from the very depths of Richie's being, and, luckily enough, had carried with it sufficient force to finally blast out whatever was causing the terrible tickle in his nose.

"My!" Doctor Reynold's voice came, after only a few seconds, "Whoever has been exploding in my has thoroughly put me off my lecture. Were we speaking about Hamlet or 'The Waste Land'?"

Richie sank in his chair. He had hoped to avoid this, this time. All throughout high school he had been known as the school's sneeze factory, variously going by nicknames from Sneezy to Big Bad Wolf to Johnny Tsunami--that particular psudonym coming from a quite unfunny teacher--but in college, he had hoped to avoid being identified primarily by his nose.

Of course, when you had a nose as big as Richie's, it was rather difficult not to notice. It was nearly always the first thing people noticed about Richie, either because he was busy sneezing or because its moderately thin but hugely protruding shape, rather like a right triangle seen in profile, was the most commanding thing about his face. And his nostrils: they were great, wide, massive things, sucking up irritants with an unholy frequency, tickling with an unthinkable burning fury, exploding with almost unimaginable, messy force. There were times when he felt his older brothers' insistence upon calling his nose Mount Vesuvius was not wholly inaccurate.

Not that any of the men in Richie's family had room to complain about his sneezes. While Richie may have gotten a double portion, this was surely a family curse: when the six Ritchie men--three older siblings: Tristan, Adrian, and Sebastian, Richie himself, his little brother Max, and his father--were united in colds and allergies, it was a wonder Richie's mother hadn't gone deaf. All six of them complained of unusually strong itches that developed deep within their nostrils, which could only be expelled by their characteristically loud sneezes. Stifling or containing the sneezes would never do; it would only intensify the tickle--and the resulting sneezes--by several orders of magnitude.

No, there was little Richie could do in such a situation besides let himself sneeze and hope that no one would notice. Which, thus far, had never happened.

"Hey, Robbins," the jock queried, "should I send out the storm warning to little pigs?"

After class, Richie walked out onto the campus, on the way to his dorm room. He was hit full in the face by the bright September sun, and by his furious nasal tickling.

"Nodda... hiihhh... nodahhh... again... HEEEYY-SHEEUU! HISSHHH! ehh... ehhhSHIIEUUU!" He let the sneezes erupt into the open air, giving them free reign to bend him in half, three times, each sneeze bigger and louder than the previous, though, for Richie, they were comparatively light, more like minor aftershocks than the sneeze-quake itself. He wished these would've hit in the lecture hall, rather than the nuclear blasts he had actually let out.

"Well, you can't always get what you want..." Richie muttered to himself.

"But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you just might find...!" Sing-shouted Richie's best friend, Adam, who had, as ever, appeared behind him.

"How do you do that?" Richie asked, "Do you stalk men unawares in the night by custom? I'm beginning to think you're practicing to be Batman."

"Richie," Adam paused to say, mock-serious, "I am Batman. And even if I wasn't, I'd be able to locate those sneezes from halfway across the campus," laughed Adam. "But anyway, what's up?"

"Well, I exploded in the middle of my Poetry and Drama class, and I'm pretty sure Professor Reynolds hates me, but besides that, not much."

"Old Vesuvius come back to life? Well, no shock there. No offense dude, but your nose has been permanently set to stun since high school."

"Yeah, I've noticihhh... ihhhh... ihhyahhhhhhhAAESSHUUU!"

The pair began walking down the cobblestone path of the university, presumably towards the dorm rooms, then cut through the quad, where, of course, the flowers begot a huge tickle in Richie's nose. "Oh! W-waaahhh... ahhh..." He tried to get the tickle under control long enough to utter the phrase "watch out," but Adam had long since learned to gage when Richie was about to embark upon one of his voyages to a Byzantium of Richter-scale rocking sneezes, and had promptly set his fingers in his ears, got down on his knees, and, in a grand military manner, announced, "Cannons are aimed! Target has been acquired! Fire at will! Fire at will!!"

The fact that he had never, frankly, fired at will, passed quickly through Richie's mind before the sneeze washed over him, washing away all thoughts other than the sneezes, and all quiet in the quad: "yyeeaaaaaaHHHCHOOOOOOOSSSHHH"

Several stunned students turned around to locate the source of the booming noise, and Adam thought that he heard a "wow," somewhere in the distance. A few birds, it seemed, started from the trees. Adam wasn't even entirely sure that he had imagined the swaying he thought he saw in a few of the trees. There was no doubt about it: Richie could sneeze. Ever since they met in freshman year of high school, Adam had seen Richie's nose at the epicenter of a daily series of frightful detonations. This particular sneeze had been not only monstrously loud but torrentially wet, leading Adam to celebrate his decision to crouch at Richie's side; he did not want to get drenched, as he had been on more than one occasion. Ever since freshman year.

"Geez, Rich, you done?" Adam asked, after giving Richie a few seconds.

"SHEEEOOO!" Richie exploded, if possible, even louder.

"Guess not." he chuckled. After Richie (and Adam) felt sure that Richie's nose wasn't about to go nuclear again, Adam stood up, began walking, and quipped, "You know, I'm looking for a side-kick; before I swoop in and lock up the baddies, maybe I can get you to sneeze and blow 'em down!"

"Shut up, Adam." Richie joked, giving Adam a playful slap on the head, before the two rushed off trading barbs as they went.

—-

Richie reached the dormroom with comparatively few incidents, although he had to force himself more than once to obey his father’s favorite dictum: don’t stifle your sneezes. Don’t even try. Richie’d heard that particular sermon preached any number of times, along with his mother’s story: “When your father went on our first date, he tried to hold those things back, and when they finally came out”—“when she smothered her spaghetti in pepper,” his father would always interject—“I thought he was going to blow everything off the table! He sounded a little like you, actually, Richie.”

So, with his mother’s slightly nasally voice ever ringing in his ears, Richie forced himself to let out a series of noisy nasal explosions, in order to satiate his nose’s uncontrollable need for relief from its buzzing, burning, incredibly tickly itching sensations. Few people could imagine just how strong the tickles in Richie’s nose got; perhaps the only way to truly represent their magnitude was their own self-expression in his explosive sneezes. He felt fairly lucky that he'd only had to give in to three or four on his way back to the dorms, although the gaggle of women who had clearly bathed in perfume were less than joyous at the sudden, shocking explosion of elephantine nasal trumpeting which had suddenly erupted to their near right, and each had jumped at least a foot in the air, much to the amusement of Adam, who'd laughed almost as loudly as Richie had sneezed.

Adam and Richie had reached their dorm room, and were sitting about, not really doing anything, as college students are wont to do in lazy afternoons, after classes but before the dinner hours. Of course, they could have been studying, but who’d want to do that? Richie was busy plotting ways to avoid blasting the cafeteria during lunch (take an extra dose of Claritin, bring a handkerchief, and always avoid pepper like the plague), while Adam sat on the bed, debating with himself about whether or not to take a nap, when he felt a tickle invade his nose. Adam’s sneezes, while certainly not tiny, couldn’t compare in the slightest to Richie’s nasal artillery, and the “ihh… ihhhh…IT-CHEEOOooey” he released was nothing compared to a Richie sneeze.

But Adam’s nose wasn’t done yet; the tickle returned, the previous sneeze having done nothing to alleviate it, but rather seeming to have augmented it: “nyehhh… hih! hih! hehhh…” Adam’s nose vacillated on the edge of a relieving sneeze, its power building with every hitch of his breath, “nighiiee…hiegh… ighhhiee… iiiaaAAAAAHHH-CHOOO!” Adam sneezed, much harder than normal.

“Woah, buddy,” Richie murmured over his shoulder, “You really let that one go; you aiming to start a sneeze fight?”

“No, no, no, no,” Adam said, still feeling a bit lightheaded from the sneeze, which had taken more out of him than usual, “getting into a sneeze war with your nose is like bringing three sticks and a baseball bat to the Crimeahhhh… Crimeaaaaahhhh… Crimean... aayyYAH-SHEWWWESSH!” Yet another draining sneeze burst from Adam’s nose, this time with some considerable spray. “Yeesshhh,” Adam said, “that would would’ve drenched a tissue almost as bad as you would! I’m turning into a fire hose sneezer like y… you… you… Ah-CHOOeeeyyy!” Adam let out yet another sneeze, although this one was comparatively light, more in keeping with Adam’s usual sub-volcanic sneeze level.

Thus far, he’d been able to avoid it, having long since learned that if he was to ever do anything except sneeze, he’d have to suppress his sympathetic sneezing reaction. But ever since he’d been a teen, Richie’s nose had been envious of anyone who let out too many sneezes around him, and desired to experience such enormous relief as came with his hurricane-strength achooeys. Thus, he felt a slight tickle brewing when Adam had released his fourth sneeze, and when he heard Adam hitching up to a fifth—“ahhh… ahh… am… ah… am I ever gonaaaahhhh stahhh… stahhh… stop… ahhh…”—he feared his nose too, would begin to go into sneezy paroxysms.

“Adam, man, ah… ah… can you get a hold on those sneezes… my n-nose is starting to tickle too… hoohhhh… ohhhh…”

Richie struggled to get a grip on the still relatively slight tickle that had invaded his nose, as Adam did his best to hold back his sneezy nose from the delightfully relieving fifth sneeze that he knew was on its way. “ahhhh… ahhhh… I-I dunno… ohhhh ahhh… hah… It ruhhhh… ruhhhheaalllly tickles. Ahhhhh… AHHHH… AYYY-CHEOOOSHH!” He let out another sneeze, the strongest, wettest, and most forceful of the bunch, although not spectacularly loud.

But anyone waiting for a noisy nose would have little time to wait. Adam’s fifth and final sneeze had sent Richie’s sympathetic tickles into overdrive, and with almost no buildup, he reared his head back, nostrils flaring wildly like a bucking horse, and bellowed out an enormous, “CCHHHHEEEOOOOOOOO!” Followed by two more, slightly less loud but torrentially wet, “PLESSHEWEY! IT-CHEWWW!” Each sneeze was a spectacularly loud, messy affair, though they were commensurate to Richie’s normal sneeze volume, which, of course, approached the ear-splitting at close ranges. It was more than enough, Richie realized sheepishly, to sound throughout the entire dorm room floor, and maybe the floors above and below. He remembered to make a mental note to avoid staying up late nights—a late night tickle could easily turn peaceful dorm-mates into irate potential tormentors, irritated by being woken by Richie’s cannon-like sneeze. He realized, too, that he might’ve shaken people from any number of midday naps.

When Richie’s series of explosions were done, an affair which sent Richie’s body completely out of control, rearing back and exploding forward with abandon, his entire body at the mercy of his monstrously powerful lungs, mouth, and most of all, nose, Adam couldn’t resist making a quip. “See why I don’t want to get in a sneezing fight with you?”

“Yeah, I know. I hate those sympathetic tickles. Gotta keep that under control,” Richie said, as much to chide his nose as anything else.

“Under control? Your nose? That’s like keeping a bull in a china shop from disturbing a single piece of porcelain. Really wish I could find out why I was sneezin’ though. Those were pretty big for me, though for you it’d be like taking an earthshaking thunderstorm and replacing it with a light, pleasant summer rain…” Adam laughed, but paused when his joking was interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Who is it?” Richie shouted, fearing that it was an irate neightbor, awoken from a nap. This had been one of his many fears about college; each of his older brothers had brought home several stories of how they had woken up between one and several fellow dorm-mates, roommates and apartment neighbors (not that the Robbins boys needed to be in the same building with a person to make themselves known by their noses; the family’s suburban neighbors had revealed on several occasions that someone, usually Richie, had been audible through the windows). Tristan, the oldest, who had, after Richie, the second most Vesuvial nose in the family, once told the story of how he had woken up, very literally, his entire dorm with a series of cold-inspired sneezes, and how only the awesomely pathetic sight of his sickly state, ensconced as he was in blankets and almost covered in used tissues and hankies, had prevented him from receiving one of his dormmates infamously cruel practical jokes.

Richie hoped to avoid such a situation, and so it was with apprehension (and desperate attempts to remember his self-defense classes) that he opened the door.

“Hey, dude!” Said the surprisingly pleasant and excited looking young man at the door, “was that a sneeze, or did somebody set of a nuke in the room next to mine?”

Relieved as Richie was by the friendliness of the visitor, Adam slightly sluggishly slid out of bed, laughing as he did, “That’s my man here, Richie, the Nose extraordinaire, the loudest sneeze in the west, superman of sneezes, the titan of ticklish nostrils, Sir Vesuvius himself, the leaf-blower…”

“Richard, just Richard is my name.” Richie cut in, eager to cut Adam off before he got to the detested “Johnnie Tsunami” epithet.

“Well, Richard-just-Richard, I had to come over here to see if that nose actually just came out of a person!”

“Sorry, I can’t help it…” Richie said, suddenly blushing slightly, “I hope I didn’t wake you or anything…”

“Nah. I wasn’t doing anything. But really, you just sneezed that loud? You got some kinda supernose or somethin’?”

“Well, it’s not exactly thin, as you can see,” Adam began, with a professorial air, “and the protruding shape and large nostrils provide some explanation as to its loud-speaker like qualities…”

“It’s just been that way since I was a kid,” sighed Richie, mildly put off by the awkward conversation.

“Dude, I haven’t heard a sneeze that loud since, like, ever, probably. Although my dad sets off some real firecrackers back at home… I didn’t think I’d hear anything like that for another few months. Kinda reminds me of home, actually.”

“Well, anytime you get homesick, just give us a ring and bring the pepper, though you might wanna bring some earplugs actually…”

“Adam. Geez, do you ever run out,” Richie inquired, with an irritated air.

“Not really.” Adam replied straightforwardly, "I'm a joke machine. And a love machine. Just FYI, let the ladies know..."

“Well,” the visitor declared, “Adam, Richie, it’s nice to meet you. I’m Jerry.” He stuck his hand out, and Richie shook it forcefully, though he found his grasp met with a vice shaking like a centrifuge.

“Nice to meet you, too.” Richie said, wincing slightly from the handshake.

“Hey, dude, we’re headed to lunch soon, wanna come?”Adam asked cheerfully.

“Yeah, totally. I was actually kinda hoping to avoid eating lunch alone,” Jerry confessed, “though I don’t know how you get through lunch, dude. Better warn ‘em: hide the pepper!”

That’s a joke I haven’t heard before Richie thought to himself. But, though not original in his jokes, this new acquaintance wasn’t half-bad, and was certainly an improvement upont the angry neighbor Richie’d feared he’d encounter. And speaking of curing homesickness…

“Are you wearing co-cologne… cologne… ehhhhh… ehhhhhhh… EHHHHHSSSSHOOOO!” Richie erupted another characteristically noisy sneeze, which, at unusually close range, prompted both Jerry and Adam to dramatically cover their ears to avoid the full blast of Richie’s nasal explosion, which was easily a nine on the Richter scale, probably a ten.

“Geez, man, I thought they were loud through the wall!” Jerry said, awestruck.

“Richie’s nose? Man, you haven’t seen anything yet. He’ll blow the paint off the walls before we graduate,” Adam joked, yet again.

“I think I might go ahead and take a shower,” Jerry responded, “I’ll meet you guys in about thirty minutes, alright?”

“Sounds great!” Adam said.

Richie would’ve replied, but Jerry’s cologne hadn’t yet finished with Richie’s surpassingly tickly and tickle-able nose. “hahhhh… HAHHHHH…HEHSHOOOH!” Richie erupted again, thanking his lucky nasal stars that his nose had seen fit, for once, to not let out a great big wet one while he was right in someone’s face. He opened his mouth to say, “nice to meet you,” but what came out was another, “TITCHEWWWEY! SHEWWWWWSH!” It was hugely, horribly wet, and in his zeal to avoid blasting his new compatiot, he had turned and, inadvertently, sprayed a great, big wet one into the face of his good friend Adam.

“Well… um… are you trying to tell me you don’t like my jokes, buddy?”

Now, getting sprayed by a sneeze was usually a messy affair, but getting sprayed by a Richie sneeze was pitched somewhere between “elephant sneeze” and “sprayed by a fire hose”. Adam was drenched, and Richie found himself reflecting yet again as to why he never, never attempted to use a pathetic tissue to hold up against the surpassing force of his all-powerful nasal eruptions, the tickly twin cannons of wind, wet, and sound that had taken up residence on his face, began full-strength operations in high school, and seemed to grow in power alone as their experience increased.

“Well, I think I’ll be taking a shower too.” Adam said, before promptly turning around, grabbing a towel and some clothes, and rushing to the bathroom, letting out an irrepressable, high-pitched, and surpassingly effete “EWWWWWW!” which sent Richie and Jerry into shaking convulsions of laughter.

—

After cleaning himself off from Richie’s hurricane-force discharge, Adam proceeded to the downstairs dining hall to meet both Richie and their new friend Jerry. Of course, he heard Richie before he saw him. “heh… heh… HAT-CHOOO!” It was a comparatively small one for his good friend Rich, but the noise still carried well out of the dining room and into the hallway. Adam often kidded Richie about his sneezes, but half the time he genuinely felt bad for the guy. After all, those massive eruptions that had punctuated almost his entire high school experience weren’t just occasional explosions, they were daily at the very least. Any number of things lit Richie’s sneezing fuse, setting off a chain reaction inside Richie’s nose that led inexorably to a blast of such volume and violence that people often inquired of Richie how such a loud noise could come out of a 45-year old 6’ 10’ two-hundred-thirty-pound ex-logger construction worker with a bad head cold, much less little old Richie Robbins. Every time he sneezed with people around, Richie would blush, shrug, and, Adam knew, mentally wish himself out of the room. It wasn’t easy having a semi-superpower—not that it’d do any good in a fight, Adam mused—for a sneeze. But it was life for poor Richie, and that was simply that.

For Adam’s part, he’d never been particularly bothered by his best friend’s outrageous a-choos. Maybe he just had ears of steel, but the volume didn’t bother him, and it did provide a decent shake-up during lulls in conversation. Heck, he’d been a regular vistor to the Robbins household, and that was an experience unto itself. Multiplying Richie’s sneezes with a father, three older brothers, and one younger made a ruckus that just didn’t make sense. If anyone needed proof that sneezes were hereditary, well, Adam knew where to bring them. He’d heard the same story from all six Richie men: it’s the tickles. The tickles, itches, tingles, and twinges that invaded the Robbins family sinuses were purportedly unbearable, like a thousand invisible brushes sweeping all the way up the nasal cavity. And the only way to get those brushes (temporarily) out was to let out a blast that could be heard across three counties (or at least a small suburban house… and a few of the adjacent ones.) Their sneezes came from their toes and then some. But the big sneezes were just the only way that they could relieve the incredible pressure and the tickle that built up in their large, protruding nostrils, swishing around their noses with an unimaginable irritation. The ones with long build-ups were the worst. He’d seen Tristan and Adrian, Sebastian and Max, even Mr. Robbins, staring up at lights, forcefully fanning under their noses, doing anything to tip the tickle out of the gate and onto the flight ramp, at which point a sneeze would shoot out from their nostrils of which any elephant would have been proud.

It was thoughts like this that preoccupied Adam as he sat down with Richie and Jerry, who were discussing the finer points of eruption-inspiring allergens.

“For my dad, is the dogs that are the worst, man, get him within ten feet of a dog, especially one of those great big shaggy things, and oh man… it’s time to break out the protective earmuffs, I’m tellin’ you…”

“Yeah, dogs get me bad too, but the cats… oh… waay… wait a second… I’b gonnahhhh… ahhh… HASHOOOEY!” Richie gasped out a “’nother… nothaaahhh” before bursting into a second tectonic shift of a sneeze, “YASSSHOOOOOO! Oh, I’m so sorry, that was a big one.”

“They’re always big ones, Rich!” Adam said as he sat down.

“Can’t argue with you there.” Richie sighed. While he often wished he could just get rid of his charateristic sneez-plosions, Richter rockers, or Richie Roars, as his nasal expulsions were variously called, Richie was grateful for friends that weren’t repulsed, shocked, or amazed by his sneezes, and he felt much less self-conscious about lettin’ it rip when Adam, or, as of today, Jerry, was around. Not that he had much (or any) choice.

“So, you two comparing notes?” asked Adam.

“Yeah,” Jerry said, “so far, we’ve mentioned flowers, pepper, animals…”

“Actually, most spices get me, red pepper worst of all.” Richie began, “In fact, the reason I sat down at this table is because it doesn’t even have a red pepper shaker, thank goodness. But I’ve blown back the fur and feathers on just about any pet you can imagine…”

They continued on talking like this, unaware that at the table just behind them, the very jock that had filled the standard role of Richie’s sneeze tormentor was subtly listening in on their conversation. Ashton Stevens was his name, and he, like Jerry, had also had a big sneezer at home. But he didn’t have such generous memories of his parents’ noisy noses. In fact, he had been driven nearly insane by his mother and father’s constant loud sneezes, which, unlike Richie’s, seemed put-on, fake, as if they both just wanted to announce to the world how noisily they could sneeze. The crowning moment had been that day, the day of senior prom… but Ashton tried not to think about it. For his part, he had rather dainty sneezes, somewhat at odds with his large and muscular build. He, of course, had never been plagued with allergies on the level of Richie’s, but he had gone through an allergic phase as a teen. During that time he constantly focused on controlling his sneezes, squelching them down until they were little more than a semi-audible, “chuh”. Richie’s gargantuan gale winds had brought him right back to that moment at the senior prom, and he secretly seethed inside every time Richie’s nose went out of control and spasmed with a silence-smashing sneeze. But he was formulating a plan, in the back of his mind, that would shame Richie into shutting up, as his parents never would.

Meanwhile, as Ashton Stevens seethed, Richie (predictably) sneezed. “yeaaaahhhh, ahhhh… aaaaahpppppSHEWWW! Uh, another one. I don’t know what’s making my nose so itchy!” The sneeze, honestly, had been the lightest one he’d let out in a while, only audible above speaking voices at the end, indicating a comparatively low-level irritation. Probably a stray flake of black pepper. While he reacted to pepper as much as anybody else, Richie had never had nearly as much of a problem with pepper as he did with dander, other spices, and the dreaded perfume and cologne.

“So,” Adam inquired, “what are you boys up to this evening. It’s Friday night, and ah… ah… HAT! CHOO!” Adam let out a neatly segregated sneeze, a firmly punctuated breath drawn in followed by a neat and tidy choo, which, although somewhat wet, was not extremely loud, as per the normal pattern of Adam’s sneeze. “Woah, I don’t know why I keep sneezing.”

“Yeah, come to think of it, neither do I,” Richie added, “do you think you’re allergic to something up here?”

“Nah, I’m as hardy as a bull, allergens can’t get me down. Try as they might, they cannot invade the fortress of my mighty nasal guard. Granted, they don’t have as big of a target on mehh… on mehhhh… me… as…. BAA-shewww!” Adam sneezed again, with a sound that sounded utterly fed-up with sneezing.

“Any chance you might be getting a cold?” Jerry inquired. Adam and Richie exchanged anxious looks. Each knew what the other was thinking: if Richie caught a cold, his sneezes, seemingly impossibly, would grow significantly in strength, volume, and mess.

“No,” Adam said, attempting to laugh away the possibility, “No way! The last time I had a cold was…”

“The camping trip in eleventh grade. And I promptly caught it and nearly blew down our tent on several different occasions.” Richie finished for him, “And I hope it’s not happening now,” he moaned, “because if you get sick, then I’ll get sick, and if I get sick…”

“Don’t worry, Rich!” Adam insisted, “I’m not getting sick! But so you don’t worry, I guess I’ll take some vitamins, and call it an early night, I guess…”

“No way, man!” Jerry interrupted, “we’ve barely been in college for a week. We’re goin’ out tonight. We’re going somewhere, and if you don’t like it, mister, too bad!”

Adam laughed. “Well, can’t argue with a command like that, sir. Where do we go?”

“There’s a nice bar nearby,” Richie offered.

“No, no, no, I mean a real club: loud music, sloppy drunks, and scantily-clad women.” Of course, at the mention of women, all three hormone-addled brains perked up instantly, and any reluctance at club-going was instantly erased.

And, Adam saw another perk:

“Plus, the club’s so loud, Richie, that it’s probably one of the few places on earth where your sneezes can’t carry. You know, places like construction sites… death metal concerts… one of my sister’s shouting—I mean singing recitals…”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. But that’s actually a good point, and the sneezes have actually been comparatively light...” but suddenly Richie’s eyes got a distant, faraway look. His nose scrunched up, and the itch exploded in his nostrils like a thousand buzzing tiny, invisible flies, sending his nostrils into a rampage of twitching, his upper lip, his entire face swishing and moving with the enormous need to sneeze that had burgeoned so suddenly in his nostrils. This was gearing up to be a real monster; his breath hitched, “hahhhh… hahhhh…,” his eyes bulged. He reached his hand up to try to scrub away the itch, although he knew it was useless. This was shaping up to be the biggest sneeze that had hit him all day… “hih! hih! ah! ah! ah! ooooh, it won’t come ou… outahhhh… ahhhhhh… ahahhhh… ahahhah…” the sneeze stuck for a moment, leaving Richie’s face in a mask of sneezy agony, the corners of his mouth turned firmly down, his eyes tearing and glancing upwards, searching for a light bright enough to send his brewing eruption into its final stages of detonation, his eyebrows severely arched. His watering eyes rapidly blinked for what seemed an eternity, before he gave his nose one more good sniff and gave in to the inevitable detonation: “hhhhaaAAA-AARRSCHOOOhhh! HAAA-HOOOOOSH-SHOOOOEY! Ahhh… igghiee… hah…" He hitched for just a few seconds before absolutely roaring out the thermonuclear explosion of his final sneeze: "RAAH-SCHOOOOOOOOHH!”

“Woah.” Said Adam and Jerry simultaneously.

The sneeze was so big, it left Richie panting a little after. It wasn’t just the biggest sneeze all day, it was the biggest set of sneezes he’d had in a month! Richie had rocked back and forth with each colossal sneeze, giving his tickly nose complete abandon. The sneezes took him over, and each was a nearly-shouted affair that was louder than most people can shout. Those sneezes seemed to come from his whole body, his nose being merely the epicenter of the eruption. He was completely out-of-control for each massive gusting sneeze, his whole frame shaking and swaying at the mercy of his king-sized schnoz and the unbearable itch that had taken three of Richie’s most powerful sneezes to expel. When he opened his eyes afterward, he was half-afraid that he’d blown the table away!

Adam and Jerry, prepared by experience, had covered their ears, but the rest of the dining hall… well, being unprepared, some had dropped forks, plates, and cups, most had stopped their conversations, and quite a few shocked “what was that?”s sounded around the room. Those had been big even for Richie, far too loud, in fact, for anyone to hear the near-simultaneous soft, tickly “chuhh! ch-hoooh! chuhh! ka-chuuhhh!” that had come from the next table over, soft barely-there puffs of air in comparison to Richie’s Kansas twister sized sneezes, which he swore would have been big enough to send Dorothy not only to Oz, but to the other said of Mars.

“Dude,” Adam said, as the dining room slowly went back to normal, after being rocked by Richie’s “You totally shouldn’t have jinxed it.”

“Ha-ha,” Richie said, not feeling exceptionally prepared for laughing after single handedly—or rather, single-nosedly”—overpowering an entire dining room full of noisy college students in volume. “Let’s just get out of here as quickly as possible. I don’t want another one of those to happen… and I think… there might still be the beginnings of a… ah…” Richie quickly clamped his hands over his nose, hoping that he might fight the tiny residual tickle back before it became another of room-rocker, or at least get outside into the open air to release the beast.

Adam, Richie, and Jerry hurried surreptitiously out of the dining room. At the table behind them, sat Ashton Stevens, face upturned, irritated tears forming in his eyes, but a smug smile on his face, nose twitching and jerking with otherwise imperceptible “chooh! chuh! ha-hushh!” sneezes, with a plate of spaghetti practically drenched in red pepper. His little “experiment” confirmed, he threw the plate away, which promptly cleared up his sneezes, and walked calmly out of the dining hall, but not before slyly sliding the red pepper shaker into his waiting pocket.

Richie had, of course, erupted again outside, although once out of the range of the red pepper flakes that were like gunpowder for Richie’s cannon-like nostrils, the sneezes hadn’t registered quite so high on the Richter Scale (“a minor aftershock!” Adam had quipped). But sneezes that huge left Richie concerned; could he be catching a cold? That would be disastrous. Besides feeling bad, he could hardly go to class, detonating another sneeze every few minutes, sneezes that would rock a three hundred person lecture hall and perhaps even send his papers flying down to the row below, sneezes that would throw even the most concentrated lecturer off of his or her game, sneezes that, in a smaller classroom, would probably disturb not only his own class, but all the classes on the floor! Of course, he’d had mega-sneezes like that before, and it didn’t always mean he was catching a cold, but if he was… well, he’d just take a lot of vitamin C that night. But going to bed early wasn’t an option. Richie, Jerry and Adam were going to a nearby club, Club Z, for a night on the town. After running back upstairs to change (again), the threesome left their dorm and headed towards Club Z, chatting all the while.

“So, Rich, how are classes going?” Adam asked, to get the conversation started.

“Oh, pretty good, when I’m not busy sneezing through them. Sebastian warned me that his sneezes tend to disrupt standard professorial activities, so I knew mine would probably blow out a few eardrums. Not that I’m not used to that sort of thing.”

“How about you, Jerry?”

“Oh, things are going well for me too. Chemistry is kicking my butt, but besides that I’m doing pretty well. That class is so boring! I almost wish that someone would come in there with a great big Richie-cane kinda sneeze. At least that way things wouldn’t be quite as boring!”

“Oh, you would have loved our high school then,” Adam cut in, “Almost every time I fell asleep in class, Richie’s nose would get an itch and once the nasal volcano got going, sleeping was not an option.”

“Whatever, Adam,” Richie said, blushing slightly at the extended discussion of his nasal… ahem, prowess, even among friends, “I didn’t even have a half of my classes with you.”

“Exactly.” Adam replied, smiling. *** Soon, Richie and company arrived at the club. However, they were still several feet away when the perfume started getting to Richie’s nose: “ah…. ahhhh… agghhha… igghhiiie… AAAA-CHOOOOH! heh… heh… AHHH-CHOOOOOH!” he sneezed, blasting out the tickly perfume smell as hard as he could. When Richie sneezed, his whole body was involved; in fact, Adam was surprised that Richie didn’t have a six-pack from all the forceful contractions of his stomach and chest as he roared out all that sneezy air at obscene velocities, and decibel levels.

“Bless ya, buddy. Are there some flowers around,” inquired Jerry.

“Na… no, nahhh.. ahhhhh WAAAAAASSSHOOOO! ARRRR-CHOOAAAYYYY!” Richie screamed out each sneeze. While not as loud as the true Richie-canes of the dining hall, these sneezes produced more than enough volume to echo loudly off of the nearby buildings and turn quite a few heads. Richie was quite afraid that an irate head would poke out of one of the windows of the high-rise apartment buildings on the street to demand that he achieve the impossible feat of quieting down his great lion’s roar of a sneeze. He’d been asked by more than one teacher (and moviegoer, and theater patron, and restaurant waiter, and even, on one notorious occasion, a few patrons at just the sort of rock concerts that Adam had supposed would be loud enough to drown out Richie’s roars, but then again, not only were all the people there drenched in cologne and perfume, but Richie had left from a friend’s house who had a very furry german shepherd, and Richie had the beginnings of a cold) to control his thunderclap sneezes, but, like the thunder, Richie’s sneezes were a force of nature, and could not be quieted down or controlled any better than the wind.

Hoping he’d gotten his nose under control with that last massive sneeze, Richie ventured to speak, “No… it’s the perfume... oh, wait… ‘nothing one’s cahhhh…. coming…. RAAAAASSSSHOOOOOH! YASSSSSSHHHHHHHH-OOO!” Richie sniffed loudly, as two girls, one of who was probably wearing the sneeze-causing perfume, looked around. The girl wearing the perfume, alright slightly tipsy, half-spoke, half-shouted, “Ugh, I can’t stand it when people exaggerate their sneezes like that! Can’t he control it? That’s just too loud!”

Aside from the irony of the woman commenting on Richie’s loud sneezes with her loud voice (although Richie had to admit that even a trained opera singer would have difficulty keeping up with him in volume when he really got going), Adam was offended by her comments about his friend, and was about to walk up and give the perfume drenched woman a piece of his mind when her friend abruptly did it for him!

“Oh, Charlene, be quiet! They can hear you. Besides, how can you expect a poor kid to control his sneezes when you can’t even control your big mouth!” Adam had to admit that he was impressed, and as Charlene and her assertive friend got in line for the same club as Adam, Richie, and Jerry, Adam made a mental note to “bump into” her at some point that night. Maybe Richie’s wind-machine strength allergies would flare up again and give him an excuse to talk to her?

Meanwhile, Ashton wasn’t far behind the trio, cringing at each of Richie’s elephantine sneezes. He thought to himself, “This is ridiculous! He sneezes even louder than my father! How embarrassing! I don’t even know how those other goons can stand to be seen around him. I’ll teach him not to be so disgusting with his sneezes.” As the perfume got to his nose, Ashton harshly muffled three sneezes by pinching his nostils, “shhhmp! chikkk! ch!” They were barely audible. Ashton fingered the red pepper in his pocket as he watched Richie and company walk into the club. He bided his time for a few minutes, and then, after walking around the block a bit, went in as well.

—-

As soon as the threesome entered the club, Ritchie rushed off to the restroom, hoping to give his nose a good, strong blow to clear his nose of perfume and pollen, so as to head off the sneezes at the pass. But by the time he reached the restroom door, his twitching, tickling nose had had too much, and, bleary-eyed, Richie let it take over for six full-strength sneezes: “HAASSSSSHHHHHOOOooooo… hh… hhhiiiiiIIIIIIIIICHOOOOOOO! Ih-CHOOO! haaahHH-CHOOOOOO! ahhhhhHHH-CHOOOO! HAHH-CHOOOOOOOhhhhheyyy” That last one was a monster, making a gutteral, throat-scraping sound as the normal “choo” was twisted by Richie’s awe-inspiring lung power into a growling, snarling shout of a sneeze, leaving Richie somewhat lightheaded and dizzy. And of course, he immediately connected the number of sneezes (Richie rarely let out so many all in a row like that) to the head cold he was desperately afraid was brewing in his firecracker nostrils, those wide, vacuum-like tunnels where tickles went in, and sneezes came out that were second only to the Big Bad Wolf with a bad cold.

And speaking of colds, Richie was terrified of developing one. Every cold he’d ever had had settled directly in his nose, causing a near-constant tickle that he could only blow out with his biggest, most ear-drum busting, dorm-wall rattling, earthquake-causing sneezes. Even Richie’s biggest sneezes could only provide momentary relief from the tickle; minutes later, the tickle would come back with a vengence, and so would the sneezes, until Richie would deliberately blow them out as hard as he could, just to get the tickle to stop for a few minutes. Richie’s colds were events in the Robbins household (and every house on the surrounding block); he hoped and prayed they wouldn’t become events on-campus too.

Looking around the restroom and finding it (thank goodness) empty, Richie marched to a stall to give his nose a few of his patented, honking nose blows. While not quite commensurate to his sneezes in volume, those bass-note honks of his could certainly send a rumble through any room, and Richie was glad that the room remained empty as he did his best to keep his nose free and clear, so as to minimize sneezing episodes.

Meanwhile, Adam and Jerry were on the prowl, and getting shut down all the time. Jerry had offered to buy drinks for no less than three women, with no success, while Adam’s jokes were falling unusually flat, perhaps owing to the volume of the music and the near-impossibility of hearing anything (except perhaps for Richie) over the thumping bass and wailing noise of the speakers.

So it was that Adam and Jerry had given up and begun dancing their way into the morass of people at the center of the club, when Richie went searching for them. Of course, hidden as they were in the mass of people, Richie had no hope of finding either of his friends, and sat down at the bar, quickly flashing his (fake) ID, and ordered a beer. He figured he’d wait until he found Adam and Jerry to start dancing, and he was sure that his nose would give him ample opportunity before then to test Adam’s theory that the noise of the club would muffle the rumbling explosions of his nose.

In fact, as the bartender slid Richie his beer, Richie felt his nose flaring into life. His breath hitched, his face contorted, his nostrils assuming control of his face, twisting this way and that as though they had a life of their own, reacting to the bucking bronco of itch that had, as always, brushed ferociously against the twitching walls of his sensitive nostrils. And as Richie’s face contorted, his watering eyes slid closed in preparation of the great big sneeze to come…

…and Ashton Stevens saw his chance. He’d been sitting at the bar, plotting how he could cause misery for Richie at the club. Luckily, he’d been at the bar while Richie had erupted in the restroom (especially since the only thing Ashton found more disgusting than sneezes was nose blowing), but now he was sitting not too far from Richie, and had been spying on him out of the corner of his eye since Richie had sat down. Now was his chance. He slid the small shaker of red pepper out of his pocket and sent a cloud floating up into the air, knowing that the strong air conditioning in the room, as well as the breeze from the constantly opening front door, would waft the tickly spice straight into Richie’s all-too-combustible nose.

And he was right. Seconds later, Richie froze, as he felt the tickle in his nose multiply exponentially. The itch in his nose, already monstrous, became a thousand buzzing flies, scurrying through his nasal passages, wreaking havoc on his sensitive sinuses, creating such tremendous pressure in his nose that he knew that the only way to get any relief would be to blast out a sneeze at full-strength. He felt it gearing up to be as big as the one in the dining hall, if not bigger. Out of his watery eyes, he took a quick glance around him: there was no way he’d get to the restroom before his Vesuvial nose gave an eruption that would put Mt. St. Helens to shame, and the way his nose was feeling, it’d be wet enough to outshine Old Faithful. But there were so many people around. Richie had been warned about it time and time again, and he knew he shouldn’t… but he didn’t want to spray any strangers! So… he stifled.

“ahh…. Ahhhhhh… AHHHHHHHHH… AGGGHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAA…” He wound up, with huge, powerful breaths, and then… “chhhmmppppppppppp!” He sneezed, somewhat wetly, but contained, and with nowhere near enough volume to be heard over the noise of the club. Stifling successful.

But his nose was on fire. It was as if he had quadrupled the already unimaginable tickle. If he was going to fire off one eruption before, now he was preparing for a twenty-one-gun salute. Finger struck firmly beneath his nose, Richie rushed to the restroom as fast as he could, pushing past the clubgoers in the crowded club, afraid to give so much as an “excuse me” for fear that speaking would tip the sneeze into the uncontrollable zone. Richie forcefully pushed the door open as he marched into the restroom, which was, of course, filled with people. In the already small, echoing restroom, Richie’s sneezes would probably reach ear-splitting volumes and annoy, if not terrify, every patron in the restroom. But it wasn’t as if he had any choice; he had to let the monsters loose.

Richie quickly swung a stall door open and closed as his breaths became audible, and grew louder, and louder… “iiihhhhhh… HHHHHiiiiIIIHHHHHH… HAHHHHHH… HAHHHHHHH…. HHAAAAHHHHHHHHH…HAAAAAAAAAAAAA-SHOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BAAACCCHOOOOOEEYYYY! HASSSHHH! HAHHSSHHHHuuhh… OOOO-SHOOOOOOOH! USSSSHHHHHH-CHHAAAHHH! Ahhhhh… Ahhhh… ahhhhh…CHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

They came, sneeze after sneeze after sneeze, outrageous in volume, hurricane like in spray. Richie heedlessly swung backwards and forwards, gulping in air to fuel each massive explosion. He knew now why his parents had warned him to never, never hold in his sneezes, because this was the result: a constantly seizing nose in a fit that would last for minutes.

The reaction of the men in the restroom, as expected had been vocal and noisy. The already somewhat drunken patrons had no trouble voicing their disapproval: “What the hell?! Did somebody drop a bomb in here? Shuddup in there, I can’t hear myself think!”

But Richie, whatever he wished, he no ability to shut up. His nose was in control now, and it was going to blow, and blow, and blow until the pent-up tickle was blasted out, full-strength.

“Hehhhh… ehhhhhh… EEHHHHH-SHOOOOOH! EH-SHOOOH! Eghhhhaaaa… haaaa… haaa… YAAAAAAA-SHHHEEEEEWWWWWWWW! SHIISSSHHHHH! ISSHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHH-SHOOOH! AHHHHHHHH-SCHOOOO! AH-SHOOOOH!”

The sneezes just kept coming, unbelievably loud, unbelievably powerful. This was one of the longest fits Richie could remember (though probably not the worst he’d experienced). Gradually, the sneezes grew farther apart: “haahhhh.. hahhhh.. HA-SHOOO! Ahhhhh… HA-SHUU! iiSHHHIIII-OO!”

Each sneeze, though still loud enough to echo through the restroom, was at a more manageable volume. Still, Richie was exausted from firing off sneeze after sneeze, and as his nose finally let out its final “heh… heh-chhh-EW!” Richie just wanted a nice long nap. He sat in the stall for a moment to survey the damage. He had been right about the spray; he could see the glistening drops decorating the entire stall door as though it had been hit with a hose. He still heard the men grumbling and muttering about his sneezes, and he was sure that those who were in the restroom (and probably those near the door) would spread the word to their friends about Richie’s incredible eruption. Sometimes, Richie just wished that his nasal curse could just go away. Why was his family cursed with the world’s most massive sneezes? Why was his nose the epicenter of such eruptions? But, as he sniffed gently, preparing for a nose blow to clear the last bits of congestion in his nose, he was glad for one thing: the tickle was completely gone.

Meanwhile, Ashton had been standing near the door, and had heard Richie firing off sneeze after sneeze after sneeze. He was red with rage; that fit had been exactly like the one his dad had blasted out at Ashton’s senior prom, in the middle of Ashton’s prom king acceptance… all over the prom queen. She dumped Ashton within the week.

Turning violently on his heel, Ashton marched out of the club, certain that he had a new secret weapon to use against Richie: if he could get him to clam up those sneezes, just once, then he knew Richie would fire off a show of sneezes so loud that Ashton could use it to embarrass Richie in front of anyone within earshot; in other words, Ashton grimly laughed to himself, anyone within a five-mile radius.

—-

Ashton, however, had not been the only person close enough to the restroom to hear those gale-force blasts trumpeting out from Richie's nostrils of fury. In fact, just as Richie was beginning to launch into a fit for the ages, Jerry had decided he ought to slip off to the restroom; no need to "break the seal" yet, but Jerry had anticipated he was in for a fairly long night, partying with his newfound friends, and--hopefully--with a few more newfound "friends" from among the club's very attractive female population, and as such wanted to make sure that his tiny bladder would not interfere with his very large-sized dreams---oh, alright, fantasies---of what would go on that night.

But Jerry was pretty far from the door when he heard that tell-tale eruption coming from the men's room. He quickly stuck his head into the restroom and knew immediately the source of the disturbance. He would scarcely have believed that even Richie could sneeze so forcefully. He was putting up a good fight with the music in the club, and that was deafening as it was. Heck, at close range, Richie's nose could have outdone a shotgun, a leafblower, a small nuclear explosion... but in the midst of these musing, Jerry noticed Ashton. Unlike everyone else in the restroom (and nearby), who were scrambling to get away from the noise, Ashton seemed transfixed. He was just standing by the restroom door, not going in, didn't seem to be coming out, and he had the most peculiar, almost devious expression on his face. Of course, Jerry knew Ashton somewhat---Ashton was touted as one of the most talented football players of the freshman class, and at their D1 school, that meant a lot. But this threw Ashton in a completely different light. Why on earth was he just standing there? And what was that strange look that passed across his face each time Richie bellowed out another monsterous, "HHHHHEEEEEESSSSSSSSCHHHHHOOOOOOOOoooooh!" Jerry was not a suspicious person by nature--and as Richie's twenty-one gun salute went on, he knew he had to check and see if Richie was alright--but he filed that instance away in his mind as yet another strange happening of college life.

The more important thing was to check on Richie. When it finally seemed that Richie's nose had calmed down enough that he'd be able to speak, Jerry ventured forth a, "Hey, man, you alright in there?"

"Jerry?" Richie responded, fearing the worst, "oh, god, don't tell me you could hear me all the way out..."

"No, no, man, I was just heading to the restroom when I heard the big bang from outside the door, don't worry. But what happened there? I didn't think you were ever going to stop!"

"N-neither did... oh, god, h-here ihhhh... here it gooohhhh... ohhhhh... oohhhhhh... ahh... HA-CHOOOOH! Man, thought I was done there," Richie give a liquid sniff, "but the aftershocks just sneak up on me."

"And speakin' of sneakin', there you guys are!" Adam quipped.

"Are you just everywhere?" Richie asked, half-laughingly, half-exasperated. Adam had the strangest habit of popping up everywhere.

"A magician never reveals his secrets, young Richard." Adam gave a sudden gasp before, "Ha-chooOOSH! Huh... hashhhooo! Ugh, must be in the air," Adam said, as he grabbed a tissue from the sink counter to blow his nose. He was a bit of a nasal honker, and his blows were decidedly louder than his generally quiet, gentle sneezes (although, in comparison to a Richie-cane, your average elephant was pretty quiet and gentle), and were much louder when he had a cold---because he didn't have Richie's almighty, head-clearing sneezes, he relied much more on forceful nose-blowing to blast out the itch from his nose, and still had far less success--unsurprisingly--that a full-force sneeze from Richie, even without a cold or that dreaded red pepper.

Richie, however, wasn't so sure that something was "in the air"; the humongous fit he'd just succumbed to made him almost positive: he was catching a cold.

"No, Adam, it's not 'in the air'--we're sick, and I'm going home." Richie declared. Adam was somewhat taken aback at his friend's unusually forceful tone, but he knew that, as always, he could joke his friend out of his resolve.

"Oh, you're not sick---granted, a 300-pound body builder with a bad head cold and a wind machine up his nose probably can’t compare to the ‘ol schozz-cannon you’ve’ got… but those, my friend, were not cold sneezes.”

“How do you know?” Richie demanded.

“I still have hearing in my right ear, obviously.”

#snz story #snz fic #male allergies #male cold #wow I haven't read this in like a decade #I should reread it maybe #old fics

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curledlife · 6 years

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Get To Know Tag!

was tagged by the sweetest: @taeyongskookie @showooyunlie @studying-mostly @kim-mins3ok !!! (different get to know tags but, eh) tysm loves!!

Rules:

Tag the person who tagged you

Answer the questions

Tag 10 people

How tall are you? short chicken nugget of a 5′2 (dunno what that is in cm)

What color and style is your hair? very black and very curly

What color are your eyes? dark brown to the point where i thought they were black

Do you wear glasses? i should be...but i don’t wear them..oops xD

Do you wear braces? i do not

What’s your fashion sense? Usually very casual sweaters with jeans or sometimes business casual with heels

Full name? i just go by J ~

When were you born? new years eve, 1998

Where are you from and where do you live now? im from the east coast still living along the east coast!

What school do you go to? oops, can’t say that info. it’s a university!

What kind of student are you? it really depends, im an A and a B type of student who procrastinates sometimes but now i found a good strategy on how to stop that.

Do you like school? again, it really depends. i don’t like the horrible expectations that school brings upon students though when school doesn’t teach you essential real life tips of the world

Favorite subject? i dont have one anymore xD im so over school

Favorite tv shows? peaky blinders, umbrella academy, and etc.

Favorite movie? mulan!

Favorite books? the shadowhunter books, the darkest mind books, and etc.

Favorite pastime? Listening to music, video editing, watching netflix or youtube videos, playing video games and more

Do you have any regrets? Yeahhhh but those have been fixed now actually

Dream job? being a game designer!

Would you ever like to be married? It’s not something that i truly aspire to do but eventually, sure

Would you like to have kids? my limit is two lol

How many? 1 or 2

Do you like shopping? depends on who im with! i usually really like to shop though, my bank account is crying lol

What countries have you visited? none! i really wanna travel when i get older though (i have been to taiwan but that was when i was 2 and since i can’t remember it, i don’t count it lol)

Scariest nightmare you have ever had? my mom passing away

Any enemies? Not that I know of

Do you have a significant other? besides taehyung? nope

Do you get along with your family? most of the time i do, usually me and my mom fight, but it’s nothing too serious

Do you believe in miracles? it truly depends

How are you? im alright! finally on spring break so im catching up on my shows and blogging. i currently have a headache, but im about to go for a cup of coffee :)

tags: @nielsmoon @woosanshine @bellaloona @monbebana @beahutiful @wonbuns @justlistentothemelody @kihyunsvibrato @huluhal @unnie-uwu (and anyone else who would like to do it!)

#i haven't done a tag like this in a while #so my damn hands are cramping now #but you don't have to do it!!#tysm!#curledtag

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skiesofthesketchy · 7 years

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The Office: part 3

AN:// lol bet yalls weren’t expecting to hear from me! yeahhhh... sorry it took me forever to post this next part. u know how life goes... :) anyway, here it is! long overdue but i hope you guys like it!! pls let me know what you think! much love <3

Part One and Part Two in case you forgot (which is my fault oops)

Author: skiesofthesketchy

Pairing: Dylan O’Brien + reader

Word Count: 3,378

Warnings: Just some cursing.

Rays of sun kissed every corner of the large park as I swung happily, enjoying the breeze through my hair and the soft squeaks from the swing set. “I bet I can jump off farther than you can,” he said from beside me.

“Yeah right.”

“Wanna bet?”

“Hell yeah! When I win you have to buy me an ice cream cone. Actually TWO so that I can shove one in your face and eat the other while I laugh at you,” I giggled, swinging higher and higher.

“No. When I win, you’ll be the one covered in ice cream!”

“You wish,” I laughed. “Go on then, jump!”

And he did, landing with a thump in the grass, only stumbling sideways a little. “And that is how it’s done,” he cheered arrogantly. “Now jump already so I can shove an ice cream cone in your face!”

“Whatever!” I yelled as I prepared to jump from the swing. I was flying until I hit the ground rather ungracefully, and stumbled backwards, landing on my ass. All I could hear now was Dylan’s howls of laughter. The bastard didn’t even bother to help me up.

I stood and dusted myself off while he composed himself, though it took a few minutes. “That was great,” he said, wiping an imaginary tear from under his eye. “Now it’s time to pay up.”

I pouted but followed Dylan reluctantly to the ice cream stand across the park. I watched him pay for a vanilla ice cream cone, and when he turned to me, I took off in a sprint.

“Hey! Come back here Y/N!”

“You’ll never catch me!” I yelled over my shoulder. I knew I wouldn’t be able to outrun him but I ran as fast as I could. I passed a group of children playing soccer and a few dogs playing fetch with their owners, everyone enjoying the sunny afternoon.

Running out of energy, I headed for the large elm tree in the middle of the park, where I rested and caught my breath, preparing myself for the inevitable.

“Dang, you’ve gotten faster,” he remarked, just as out of breath as I was.

“Just do it already,” I pleaded, closing my eyes and waiting for the cold treat to coat my face.

“You didn’t think I’d actually dump this ice cream on you, did you?” he chuckled.

I opened my eyes. “What do you mean? I lost the bet.”

“But that would be mean. I got this so we could share it,” he smiled, pulling me against with his arm around my waist. I was surprised, but smiled at him- the boy of my dreams. “Here,” he said, before abruptly shoving the ice cream onto my mouth and chin.

“Dylan!” I screamed. “I can’t believe I fell for that!”

He threw his head back and laughed loudly, which distracted him enough for me to snatch the cone from his hand and do the same thing he did to me.

“Hey!” I only smirked at him while licking whatever ice cream was left in the cone. “That was uncalled for.”

“You deserved it.”

Dylan glared at me playfully before grabbing me by the waist again and pulling me in for a kiss, our sticky ice cream faces now smooshed together.

I broke the messy kiss. “You’re crazy, Dylan O’Brien.”

“Not as crazy as you.”

-----

Great. This is just great. Memories that I haven’t recalled in months now invaded my mind with a thick fog that I couldn’t see through. I couldn’t sleep last night, and trying to focus right now seems impossible, as I trudge into my office building in my zombie-like state. Why can’t I stop thinking about him?

I try to push any thought of Dylan and Lauren out of my head as I make my way to my desk after stepping off the elevator. Quietly mumbling a hello to Ben, I slouch at my desk and start my computer.

“Well, good morning to you too, sleepy head,” Ben chirped, pursing his lips with his usual sass.

I just gave him a look as if to say, “I’m not in the mood.”

He rolled his eyes at me. “I know you have your cranky mornings, but you don’t have to be a soggy hoe about it.”

“Sorry,” I huffed. “I just... don’t want to be here right now.”

Ben sighed dramatically. “I do not know why I put up with you sometimes,” he said, taking one of two coffees from his desk and putting it onto mine.

I swiftly grabbed the coffee and greedily took a few gulps, immediately feeling better. Did I mention how much I love coffee? “Me neither, but I’m incredibly lucky that you do,” I hummed, leaning over and kissing Ben on the cheek.

He laughed. “It is quite amazing how fast your mood changes with a little caffeine. You’re welcome baby doll.” He cleared his throat. “So what’s the deal?”

“With?”

“Queen Bitch and your man. Duh”

“I wouldn’t know. I just walked in. And I wholeheartedly hope that I don’t have find out all the gory details of last night.”

“And I wholeheartedly hope you do, because work was just starting to get boring before you walked in with lover boy yesterday. Oh wait, two lover boys.”

I rolled my eyes. “Well I’m glad my hot mess of a life amuses you. And I’m gonna pretend you didn’t just refer to my co-workers as ‘Lover Boys.’”

Before Ben could respond, a laugh echoed throughout the office; one that drives me absolutely insane. Lauren, with her arm hooked on Dylan’s, cackled as they entered. What's so funny? And why does my desk have to be so close to the elevators?

I caught Dylan’s eyes and he smiled and nodded towards me. I forced a smile back, but my face dropped once I met glances with Lauren. Her eyebrow raised and she smirked. “What kind of game is she playing?” I mumbled, as the two of them made their way towards their desks.

“Who even knows?” Ben chimed in to what was supposed to be my own personal conversation. “But by the looks of it, their date last night went well.”

All I could do was groan. Of all the girls at the office, why her? If Lauren wasn’t in the equation, I probably wouldn’t be having these feelings for him flooding back to me, though Ben would probably disagree.

“Whatever. I’m just going to focus on work, and not think about them at all,” I said, trying to convince myself more than I was trying to convince Ben.

“Whatever you say, Hun.”

----------------------------------

The morning went by excruciatingly slow. It felt like I had been perched at this desk for days, but only a few hours have passed. I tapped my fingers impatiently, finding it hard to sit still.

“Can you chill?” Ben asked. “It’s bad enough I have to deal with your leg bouncin’ all the time. Please don’t make tapping a thing or I will have to murder you mercilessly. Right here in the office. Don’t embarrass us like that, Y/N.”

“I think I need another coffee.”

“No, no, no. Caffeine will just make you more fidgety. Go take a walk or something. Here,” he said, handing me a pile of folders. “Go run these reports over to Trends for me. Thanks hun bun.”

“Ben, no.” He knows fully well that Dylan works over in Trends.

“Girl, yes. You and I both know that you’re just dying to talk to him.”

“No, I most definitely don’t want to talk to him.”

“Yes you do. Now go.”

“No.” Ben gave me a look that reminded me of when my mom used to scold me as a child. “Ugh,” I pouted. “Fine. But I hate you.”

“Sure you do.”

Bringing the large stack of folders up to my chest, I stood up and started heading towards the Trends area. Striding over, I put the reports on James’ desk, the leader of the team. He nodded to me as a thank you, and I pivoted to head back to my desk, but someone called my name.

“Oh, hey Dylan,” I responded, walking over to his desk. I was kind of hoping to avoid him, since he was oh so snuggly with Lauren this morning, and I would rather not have to hear about it, but it was too late now. He had stood up and made his way around the desk to lean on it. “How are you?”

“Doing pretty good. How ‘bout yourself?” he asked.

“A little tired, not gonna lie. This day just feels like it’s dragging on.”

He laughed. “I know what you mean.” I peered around, checking to see if Lauren was ready to pop out of nowhere like she usually does.

“So...” I hesitated, not really sure if I should actually finish this sentence. “How was your date last night?” I asked, nudging his side as I turned to lean on his desk beside him, my teasing and cheery attitude hopefully covering up the fact that my whole body was burning with anger and, fine I'll admit it, jealousy.

Dylan looked at me with the same expression he had yesterday after I found out him and Lauren would be going out together. Studying my features, analyzing my expression.

I kept up my happy demeanor even though the way he looked at me caused more mini flashbacks of our past relationship to pop into my head.

“Oh,” he said after a moment, finally turning away. “It was nice.”

“Just nice?” I asked, still teasing.

He let a sheepish laugh leave his lips. “Yes, it was the perfect amount of nice. Quite nice indeed.” I smiled when he decided to humor me.

“Hmm, interesting. I didn't think you were the type of guy to settle for ‘nice,’” I replied, using air quotes. I was technically implying that he could do better than Lauren, and I was only half hoping he would pick up on that.

“Oh, Y/N.” He stood up and placed himself in front of me. “I know you think you know me, but I've changed a lot in the past two years.” Is that a smirk I see?

“Well, Dylan, I've changed a lot too,” I poked him in the chest.

He squinted and the corners of his mouth quirked up. “I can tell.”

Though I was curious to find out what about me he found noticeably different, I ignored that part of me. “I’m guessing you’re still a huge Star Wars nerd, though.”

“Of course! How can anyone not like Star Wars?” he defended himself, laughing.

“I’m not trying to knock Star Wars, I’m just making fun of you.”

Dylan gasped mockingly. “At least I’m not obsessed with that dumb reality tv show! What was it? The Bachelor?”

“Hey! I’ll have you know I watch it for comedic purposes! And the Bachelorette is way better. Boy drama is hilarious.”

As we laughed together, I found myself staring at him again. The moment felt exactly like the one we shared yesterday just minutes after we had met for the first time in two years. I knew what he was thinking, because I was thinking the same thing: this feels just like old times.

“Dyl!” We both heard Lauren’s annoying call, but neither one of us acknowledged it, trying to stay in our moment for just a few seconds longer before we were inevitably interrupted.

I was the first to look away from Dylan and at Lauren, who seemed to be pissed judging by the way she stomped over to us in her heels. Her perfectly perfect smile wasn’t enough to cover up her mood this time. It was only when Lauren firmly grabbed Dylan’s shoulder that his eyes left me.

“Hi babe!” she squealed, completely ignoring my presence now. “Look what I brought you!” Her face was dangerously close to his and to be honest, he looked kind of uncomfortable with the proximity. Or maybe it was the yelling. Why the fuck was she so loud and high-pitched all the time? “It’s green juice. It’s like super healthy for you, and that’s why I got you one! You have to keep your energy up, it’s still your first week on the job!”

“Oh, Lauren. Thanks,” he said, taking the bottle of green, lumpy slime in his hand.

“It’s no problem at all! Anything I can do to help you, babe!” There’s that word again. Cringe.

Since Lauren obviously doesn’t give a damn that Dylan and I were having a conversation, I’ll just leave. I don’t want to hear her obnoxious voice anymore. If I don’t leave now, I might have to hear her spew something about their “nice” date last night.

“I had a lot of fun last night,” Lauren whispered, bringing her arms around his neck, not ashamed at all to act so clingy while in the office. I’m going to vomit.

“Alright, and that’s my cue to go.”

“Oh! Y/N, I didn’t see you there,” Lauren smiled sweetly, still clinging to Dylan.

“Sure you didn’t,” I replied, not in the mood to play fake nice today. I smiled at Dylan before squeezing past them.

“Wait, Y/N,” he called after me.

Instead of sticking around to hear what he wanted to stay, I glanced back with a, “See you later!” before heading back to my desk.

“So, how’d it go with Lover Boy?” Ben asked. I huffed.

“It was going great, until you-know-who showed up.” Ben and I made an “Eck,” sound in unison.

“Let me guess. Lauren has already made wedding announcements?” I just snickered in response. What did Lauren mean when she said she “had fun” last night? Did they just have a delightful dinner or did they...

“Y/N. I need you in my office,” Cheryl interrupted my thoughts, thankfully. She sped away before I could even respond to her, but I quickly got up to follow her back to her office.

After closing the door behind me, I took a seat in front of Cheryl’s desk. “Has the new employee been acquainted?” she asked bluntly, and somewhat disinterested as she looked over papers on her desk.

“Mr. O’Brien? Yes,” I replied. “He settled in easily and has been hard at work. He fits in nicely in my personal opinion.”

“Good. That’s very good,” she glanced up for a moment before shuffling through more documents. “Remember to have his report written up by next week.”

“Of course.”

“Also, I need you to help finalize the current campaign proposal before we bring it to the board tomorrow. I would do it myself but I need to leave early today.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

“Great. Mr. Barnes is waiting for you in his office.”

“Ethan?” I said aloud without thinking.

“Yes. Is that a problem?” She looked at me confused.

“No, ma’am. Of course not.”

“I understand you two are dating now, but I expect you to keep it professional while at work.”

I found myself too shocked to respond as she ushered me out of her office without another word. Even my fucking boss thinks Ethan and I are dating. Great. If this “news” has reached Cheryl already, why haven’t I been contacted by HR? I guess I’ll deal with that problem when it arrives.

Slouching my way over to Ethan’s personal office, I mentally prepared myself for his flirty demeanor and cocky persona. I knocked a few times before letting myself in.

“Y/N. What a pleasant surprise,” he said, winking at me. “For what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Cheryl wanted me to help you with the campaign proposal you’re working on.”

“Oh, perfect. Come have a seat.”

I made myself comfortable across from him at his desk while he rearranged papers and folders, handing me a few. “Alright let’s get started.”

I was surprised to find that Ethan and I working together on this project was strictly professional. No snide remarks or innuendos from him. He’s actually a decent person to be around when he’s working. We finished rather quickly and I was relieved. It’s well past lunch hour and I haven’t eaten. “Thanks for your help on this. If I had to handle this myself it would’ve taken forever.”

“No problem,” I replied. “I’m happy to be of service.” I stood up and stretched a little before making my way to the door. I only made a few steps before I felt Ethan grab my hand.

“Wait, Y/N.”

“Yeah?”

“I just wanted to apologize,” he said.

“For what?” I asked, my eyebrows furrowed with confusion.

“For yesterday. I basically demanded that you go to lunch with me, and I came off like a total jackass. I’m sorry.” I searched his steel blue eyes and all I found was sincerity. I never thought I’d hear an actual apology from Ethan Barnes.

“I appreciate your apology,” I smiled.

“For what it’s worth, I’m really glad you said yes. I had a great time,” he said with a soft smile.

“Me too.” I looked down at his hand still holding mine, and wondered what would happen next. I don’t know if I want anything to happen at all. Maybe I should just leave...

“O-oh,” we heard someone say from the doorway, and my head snapped up to see it was Dylan. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt,” he said audaciously, chest out and eyes scanning Ethan and his grip he still had on me. It was obvious he wasn’t sorry at all, and his bold aura that entered the small room made me drop Ethan’s hand as if I had done something wrong.

“A polite knock wouldn’t have killed you,” Ethan shot back, obviously annoyed. But there was something else in his tone... Suddenly I could feel the tension in the room, and it was rising as the two glared at each other.

“Well anyway, Y/N, I need to talk to you about this report,” Dylan said, completely ignoring Ethan’s reply.

Wanting to avoid whatever the hell was going on here, I left Ethan’s side and started towards Dylan and the exit. “Um, yeah of course--”

“What was your name again? Was it Daniel?” Ethan interrupted my flee, stalking forwards arrogantly.

“It’s Dylan.” His jaw clenched as he mimicked the dominant posture Ethan displayed.

“Right,” Ethan dismissed. “Well I just want to emphasize to knock next time,” he all but growled. “It’s rude and incredibly unprofessional to barge in the way you just did, and Y/N and I were not finished doing business.”

“Whatever I walked into sure as hell didn’t look like business.”

I saw the anger rising in Ethan’s eyes and I wanted to interject, but I’m too occupied with confusion as to why I’m suddenly standing in a warzone between the two alpha-males. Both obviously have issues with one another but I can’t figure out why.

“Whatever business I have with Y/N is none of your business. So why don’t you go ahead and show yourself out while we finish up here,” the blonde sneered. They’re talking like I’m not even here.

“You see, I would but I kinda have this really important work thing that I need her help on, so yeah. Not leaving without her. Thanks though.”

Ethan was all but fuming because of Dylan’s remark, and I finally came out of my shock and confusion long enough to cut in. “Alright boys. That’s enough. Ethan, we were done anyway.” I looked into his blue eyes with a warning not to argue. Turning to Dylan, I gestured for him to lead the way out, wanting to keep myself between the two. With the door shutting loudly behind me, I took a deep breath, happy to be out of that intense situation. Why it escalated so much was still a mystery to me.

“So, what is this report we’re looking at?” I asked, as we walked back through the office and towards my workspace.

“Here,” he responded, handing me a folder covered in colorful sticky notes. He was obviously still tense. “James told me you were the best person to talk to about this.” I sat down in my chair and quickly skimmed the first few pages.

“Right, okay. Well--”

“Are you hungry?” he interjected. “We can talk about it over lunch.”

“God, I’m starving! Yes please.”

127 notes · View notes

n3rdlif343va · 7 years

Note

Okay. Get this. Good uncle Yuuri is planning the triplets' birthday party and hires magician! Victor. Victor chooses Yuuri as a participant even though it's a kid birthday party and he's supposed to choose a kid.

Okay. Get this. You sent me this amazing thought, and I decided to write a 2,000+ word fic on it. Because my self-control needs to be located by search party. I’m going to post the whole thing here and move it to Ao3 tomorrow when I feel less lazy :). Thank you for sharing this INSANELY INSPIRING idea with me and I hope you enjoy…. “Magic Man” :)

(It is long so there is a cut line! Definitely SFW!)

The ad had said that Victor the Great could entertainaudiences of all ages, that his tricks were beyond anyone’s wildest dreams, andthat he could convince even the most cynical people that magic was real.

What the ad didn’t say, was that Victor was absolutely themost beautiful man who had ever dared to exist on earth.

The lack of warning had certainly taken a toll on Yuuri’sheart, as he opened the front door to Yuuko’s house and came face-to-face with theman-god parading as a children’s party magician. The black top hat, tailedblack coat and bright red bow tie should have immediately elicited laughter.Instead, Yuuri felt his tongue swell two sizes in his mouth and steal away hisability to speak. Maybe that was Victor’s first trick, robbing Yuuri of all hissenses with the man’s magical out-of-this-world blue eyes and smile that litYuuri’s body on fire. Blushing and staring at his feet, Yuuri waved Victor intothe house and lead him to the back yard where the show would take place.

Victor followed the dark-haired man through a dining roomfilled with delicious looking food, through a kitchen that looked like a foodbomb got gone off, and out into a backyard that was chaotic with kid noise.Children ran in every direction, giggling and yelling “you’re it!” as theytagged their friends. On the outskirts of the yard, the adults stood in smallclumps of conversation, occasionally dodging a sprinting child. It was atypical kid party, and Victor grinned at the lively nature of his futureaudience.

“Um… here…” Yuuri stopped and pointed to the small platformof a wood deck. “I mean…” rubbing the back of his neck, Yuuri could feel theblush on his cheeks heating up as the blue eyes studied him, “you can set uphere.” Finally gaining an ounce of courage, Yuuri lifted his gaze to meetVictor’s.

“Are you Yuuri?” Stepping forward, Victor set his blackcases onto the deck. His slight invasion of Yuuri’s personal space wasintentional as Victor continued to smile at the adorable man.

Yuuri’s first email, inquiring about Victor’s availabilityfor the party, had been formal and inquisitive. Victor had responded backquickly, confirming that he would love to provide entertainment. It was Yuuri’ssecond response, with a cheeky question about Victor arriving by car or in apuff of smoke that had peaked Victor’s interest. It had been a silly joke, butVictor had played along, answering not only in jest, but also with a hint offlirting.

Nineteen emails had been exchanged over the course of twoweeks and Victor had been unable to sleep the night before the party, theanticipation of meeting his email partner keeping him awake with nervousenergy. The dark mop of hair, shy brown eyes, and flushing cheeks had to belongto Yuuri Katsuki, and Victor had been trying to come up with something cleverthroughout their short walk through the house. Instead of cleverness, he hadbarely managed to ask Yuuri to identify himself, and Victor was internallygroaning over his own failure.

Swallowing, Yuuri studied Victor’s face. “I am,” he said, gainingcourage he stuck out his hand, “uh, nice to meet you Victor the Great.” WhenVictor chuckled, Yuuri wanted to crawl inside of the piñata and let the kidsbeat his embarrassment out of him.

“You’ll watch the show, won’t you?” Victor slipped his handinto Yuuri’s, squeezing it slightly. “Maybe if you watch me closely, you’ll beable to figure out my tricks.” Leaning forward again, Victor winked at Yuuri.He prayed that he sounded flirty instead of creepy.

“UNCLE YUURI!! UNCLE YUURI!!!”

Getting tackled from behind by three squealing triplets,Yuuri fell forward into Victor’s arms. Freezing, Yuuri looked up andimmediately lost himself again in Victor’s eyes. Feeling his body shaken by theforce of three sets of hands, Yuuri snapped his attention back to his nieces. “Momsaid you have to help with the piñata while the magician sets up! Dad said youcan flirt later!” All three girls cackled at their joke as Yuuri’s face caughtfire.

Smile on his lips, Victor stepped up onto the wooden deckand bent to open his first case. “I’m ok with that plan,” throwing a wink overhis shoulder, Victor forced himself to concentrate on his props as a stammeringYuuri was dragged toward the line of screaming kids.

Yuuri was a distraction. Victor couldn’t stop analyzing howadorable his new crush looked with the triplets draped over his lap as all theparty guests watched the show. Although his tricks had gone off without ahitch, Victor could feel his concentration wavering every time Yuuri laughedalong with the children. Taking a deep breath, Victor decided to remedy thesituation immediately.

“I need a volunteer from the audience!” All of the children’shands were instantly in the air, punctuated with a chorus of “pick me! Pick me!”One of the birthday girls had managed to knock Yuuri’s glasses askew in theirexcitement, and Victor’s mind went blank as Yuuri pulled them off entirely. Itwas like looking at two different, but equally attractive, men and Victorwondered if Yuuri was somehow actually magic. Ignoring all fifteen wildlywaving children, Victor pointed directly at Yuuri and said “ah yes you, youngman in the blue shirt, how about you join me?”

The children made sounds of disappointment as the tripletsproceeded to push Yuuri up from the ground and shove him toward the stage.Their smirks in Victor’s direction left the magician wondering if he had gainedallies in his quest to woo Yuuri. Reaching out, Victor wrapped a hand aroundYuuri’s elbow and pulled him close. “Alright, my lovely assistant, I need youto cuff me.” At the back of the yard, Takeshi choked on his drink and Yuukopatted his back as he laughed through the pain.

“Do what?!” Yuuri exclaimed, pulling back to stare at Victorwith wide eyes. His mind had not gone to any decent place and Yuuri was goingto need immediate clarification as to the exact nature of Victor’s request.

Lifting a pair of handcuffs from his pocket, Victor dangledthem in front of Yuuri’s face. “Please secure both of these handcuffs to myright wrist. Can you do that for me, Yuuri?” Dropping the handcuffs into Yuuri’sopen palm, Victor let the playful smirk dance over his lips. “Make sure theyare nice and tight.” The request was made close to Yuuri’s ear as Victor dippeddown to whisper his request.

Yuuri’s fingers faltered for a second as he slid the metalcuffs into place. The skin on Victor’s wrist felt like warm silk and Yuuri hadto stop himself from grazing it purposely with his fingertips. Taking a shakybreath, Yuuri dropped his hands and peered up at Victor through his eyelashes. “Nowwhat?” A large part of him was curious about whatever Victor’s trick would be,while a smaller part of him was hoping it would involve Victor continuing tostay close to him.

“Now we hold hands!” Victor declared with a wave to theaudience as he wrapped his fingers around Yuuri’s. “And…” dropping a red clothover their joined hands, Victor took the opportunity to run his thumb overYuuri’s as they clasped hands disappeared from sight, “if you will all say themagic words!” Again, Victor waved to the audience and laughed as the kidschanted, “abracadabra alacazam!” Pinching the red cloth, Victor flung it away.

Staring down at their still linked fingers, Yuuri gaped asone of the cuffs had moved onto his wrist. “We’re handcuffed together!” Toemphasize the point, Yuuri dropped Victor’s hand and lifted his own wrist intothe air. Victor’s came with it, the metal cuffs tethering them together. Fromthe back of the yard, Takeshi yelled “yeahhhh boiii!” pumping a fist in the airuntil Yuuko smacked him.

“Silly me!” Patting all of his pockets, Victor pretended tolook worried. “It seems like I have forgotten the key! I guess you will have tostay locked to me forever, Yuuri.”

The mini instigators seated on the lawn began a taunting, “ohhhhhh”making Yuuri flush bright red. “I… there… maybe we can get out of it by magic?”It sounded lame, even to Yuuri, but he couldn’t stay attached to Victorforever. Not that the idea really sounded bad,but it was most certainly not practical. “Come on Victor, let’s end this.”Waving their joined wrists in the air, Yuuri couldn’t help but giggle as Victorlooked offended.

“You wound me, Yuuri!” Victor cried, dramatically droppinghis head to his chin. “How shall I ever recover?” Pretending to wail, Victorbit his lip as the children began to hysterically laugh.

One very astute little boy shouted above the laughter of theothers. “If you stay like that forever, how would you pee?!”

Catching Victor’s eye, Yuuri snorted out a laugh. “See, wecan’t pee, and that’s bad.” Letting the laughter overtake him, Yuuri shook hishead as Victor joined in.

Taking a deep breath, Victor tried to control himself. Showshadn’t been this fun in a very long time. “Alright, alright, I believe there isa bit of magic that can help us here, but…” glancing sideways at Yuuri, Victorcame up with a plan, “it is secret magic. So if you are less than ten yearsold, come gather really close and I will tell you all about it.” The childrenrushed Victor, who crouched down, but kept his arm elevated to leave Yuuristanding.

Hearing the words “this is what we have to do” float overthe sea of tiny heads, Yuuri decided it was better if he didn’t know. Looking tothe back of the yard, he rolled his eyes as Yuuko, Takeshi, and his best friendPhichit all gave him thumbs ups. When he felt his arm jostle, Yuuri refocusedas Victor returned to a standing position.

“Ok,” Victor winked at the kids, “what are the two things weneed to release these handcuffs?”

“MAGIC WORDS!” came the unison shout from the kids, who wereall bouncing excitedly on their toes.

“And what are those magic words?” Victor guided, taking astep closer to Yuuri and placing the cloth back over their hands.

“YUURI WILL YOU GO OUT WITH VICTOR!” They all shouted,collapsing in a fit of giggles.

Stealing a glance in Yuuri’s direction, Victor bit his lip.Those adorable cheeks were bright red again, but the shocked smile was allVictor needed to keep going with his plan. “What’s the second thing we need?”

“TRUE LOVE’S KISS!!” The kids shouted, so loudly all of theadults jumped.

Spinning to face Yuuri, Victor raised one eyebrow,registering the glimmer in Yuuri’s wide eyes. Leaning in, Victor pressed hislips briefly to Yuuri’s before pulling back to throw the red cloth off theirwrists again. Hanging in Victor’s hand were the set of unlocked cuffs.

The kids exploded with applause, chanting Victor’s nameuntil all of the parents rushed forward to quiet them down. As Yuuko usheredthem away to the tables to consume another round of sugar, Victor shruggedsheepishly toward Yuuri. “You don’t have to… you know… go… if you don’t want…”He was suddenly nervous and unable to look up from his own feet.

“And deny true love?” Somewhere between being shocked byVictor’s magic words and electrified by Victor’s brief kiss, Yuuri had foundhis words. “I wouldn’t do that.” Tugging on Victor’s bow tie, Yuuri encouragedVictor to look up. “How about I take you sightseeing tomorrow? Since you saidyou are new to town.”

Grinning, an impossible heart being formed by Victor’s lips,he nodded his acceptance. He felt alive in a way he hadn’t for a long time, andVictor couldn’t wait to see what else was in store.

“Dedushka!” The small dark-haired child in Victor’s laprolled his eyes. “You have told that story like one million times! I want tohear a new story about you and Ojiisan!!” Victor laughed, throwing his headback as he did so to look up at Yuuri. The beautiful cheeks were covered inwrinkles now, the mop of black hair was splattered with white, and the eyeswere certainly less shy, but his husband was still every bit as alluring as hehad been on that first day.

“Let me try,” Yuuri said, plucking the small boy from Victor’slap and settling down on the couch. “Let me tell you about the time yourDedushka and I attempted to take up ice skating…” Winking at his husband whowas still magically stunning after all these years, Yuuri began to weave a taleof their epic failure as ice skaters.

#yoi #fyeahyoi #victuuriwriters #victuuri #yuri on ice #magician victor #yuuri is cute #cuff me baby #I really hope you like this!

271 notes · View notes

peachingboy · 8 years

Text

Boku No Hero Light Novel II Translations.

Chapter 1, Commence the Study Groups! Final Part

(そろそろの勉強会)

[Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4]

t/n: I’d never expect I’d finish this chapter so soon, but nonetheless I hope everyone’s been enjoying it so far! In regards to next translations, I’ll be picking out chapters I feel are the most fun and would be most interesting for people to read, so I’ll be skipping a couple :( but with that being said, I’d probably go back to translate them at a later time in life (this goes for the first light novel too), So right now it’s a toss up between two chaps; a+b girls having a girly night and talking about which guys they’d date AND a+b boys arm wrestling and well… being boys ^_^ pls let me know if there’s one you’d like to read first, if not I’ll just randomly choose or smth.

but yeahhhh, once again thank you so much for reading!!!! ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

Kirishima has concluded that studying can only be done well if it’s done on your own, however around the same time Kyouka and Ashido are still very lost within the mansion.

“Shoot, we should have waited for the maid to bring us back.”

“Oh wells! If we just walk a bit, we’ll eventually get back!”

Kyouka draws a worried look, she narrows her eyebrows while Ashido was going on like her usual happy go lucky self.

“Don’t you think this is a good opportunity? While we’re on the hunt for the lecture hall, we’ll be on an adventure at the same time!”

“ehhhh?”

“Adventure! Adventure!”, and like that Ashido started skipping happily while Kyouka had no choice but to follow her lead as usual.

“Listen, afterwards Yaomomo is going to give us a tour of her room.”

“huh?”

The identical doors and walls carried on forever, this is by no doubt a giant maze.

They wondered what it felt like having grown up living in a place like this, but Yaoyorozu being here since birth, as far as she’s concerned, this is nothing out of the ordinary for her.

Kyouka suddenly remembers Yaoyorozu’s mother and her judgemental look.

“…….”

Kyouka kept checking her clothes over and over.

“…..hey, my clothes… are they weird?”

“Clothes? They’re really cool and cute!….huh? librar-…ah! Here’s the library!”

They looked at the conspicuous plate on the large door, “ehhh-” Ashido was obviously very impressed while Kyouka just let out a small sigh.

This had Ashido’s interest, the finely divided sections in the library were distinct but the genre’s were all pretty much the same.

However, Yaoyorozu’s kinda genre were already very distinct.

Kyouka was all about punk fashion, Yaoyorozu was very refined and neat.

Kyouka’s favourite music is rock, Yaoyorozu’s was classicals.

Their hobbies, their appearance, the environments they were raised in, everything was extremely different.

And if they were to have anything in common, it’ll probably only be the fact that they’re both girls.

But despite their differences, before they even realised, they became really close.

Yaomomo is a good girl, you can see it in her perfectness, although she had amazing self confidence and was always doing the best, that was nothing but the ordinary for her.

She wasn’t stuck up though, she was actually really easy to talk to, this was what a normal friendship was.

And for this reason, Kyouka was a little more determined to think better of her friend’s family.

“Kyouka sama, Ashido sama, please, this way.”

“Ah, Butler-san!”

Kyouka swung her head around to face the voice that was coming from behind them, the butler has finally come for them! though, you can hear the minor disappointment in Ashido’s voice.

“My deepest apologies, I will escort you back immediately.”

“Ahh, it’s okay, let us go back on our own please!”

“Please forgive me, however, it is my duty to stop you from losing your way.”

“Don’t worry about that at all! Going on an adventure is fun!”

“My goodness…. shall we return to the lecture hall.” said the butler who suddenly paused to think before he opened his mouth again.

“Before returning to the lecture hall, shall we visit young lady Momo?”

They followed behind the butler when a strange smell struck them, it seeped towards them and the more they walked the thicker the scent became.

“uhh, what kinda smell is this?!” Ashido asked trying to endure it with her hand over he nose.

The butler stopped in his track and turned around.

“….. the smell from the cookies before.”

“Eh?! that cookie?”

“Please this way.” The butler ushered both Kyouka and Ashido forward, to add to their confusion, they could hear two additional footsteps pattering about.

“…….Mother! Please that’s enough, let’s just leave it.”

“Maaaa, what can go wrong?”

The voices heard were that of Yaoyorozu and her mother. Kyouka and Ashido decided to take a small peek at them.

“Hm, as expected, blue flsh and chocolate don’t mix well together.”

“But listen here Momo, blue fish has oils that is good for the brain, isn’t that great? And also this cocoa, it’s going to be alright! If we add the oyster into the mixer too, the fish’s texture won’t be obvious. I added it into the other cookies before, you couldn’t tell right?”

They were in the kitchen which was oddly normal and looked like it wasn’t going to turn into a restaurant or anything anytime soon.

Both Yaoyorozu and her mother were talking in front of a chopping board with a fresh fish laid out along with some cabbage, fancy herbs, natto and a variety of random spices.

Judging from the subject matter, it seemed like the cookies from earlier were handmade by Yaoyorozu’s mother.

“….Yaomomo, it seems like you’re not that great at cooking ey?” Ashido whispers with Kyouka nodding in agreement.

It was an unexpected surprise, but even though she couldn’t cook, she still looked like she knew what she was doing.

The two of them watched them with worried faces while Yaoyorozu continued speaking.

“But, this fishy smell, this… mother you can not tell can you? this smell…”

“Ah, now that you say that, I didn’t smell anything from earlier either, did I catch a cold?”

Doesn’t that mean your nose is paralysed or something?!

“How about we take a short break from cooking?”

“No, I’d rather not, I shall carry on with the cookies.”

“What no, just end it right there.” Kyouka thought.

Yaoyorozu’s mother was obviously touched by her daughter’s word and formed both her hand into fists giving her daughter some fighting spirit.

“I guess much, after all this is for your friends and their end of term test! If they fail they won’t be able to attend the lodge camp right? If Momo is supporting them with their studies, I am going to support them by boosting their brain activity with these cookies! Just for this special study group.”

Kyouka was slightly taken back, she looked back at the ingredients, as expected they were all there to benefit their brains.

“… Mother, thank you I really appreciate those feelings of yours.”

“That’s okay, earlier I did mix up the salt an sugar, but this time I won’t! Anyways, do you think curry powder would be good? ah, if we put some on both sides wouldn’t that be great?!”

What is this, isn’t she just like any other mother, Kyouka thought as she watched Yaoyorozu’s mother.

“Yaomomo is really caring isn’t she?”

“mhmhm”

As Kyouka nodded in agreement, Yaoyorozu noticed their presence.

“Oh you two! what are you doing here?”

“I was just escorting them back to the lecture hall.” The butler appeared and interrupted with a gentle bow.

Wait what if the butler knew about the cookies before, why did he try to conceal it, Kyouka thought.

“Hey, those cookies from before, as expected they weren’t really good right?” Yaoyorozu whispered.

As expected Yaoyorozu is Yaoyorozu, she did not want to hurt her mother’s feelings.

What is this, aren’t they just a normal family? Kyouka smiles as her feelings began to ease up.

“…. it’s okay! the taste is a little unique, but eating it has made our head buzz with energy!”

“Yup, I guess this is the secret to studying!”

“Kaminary will definitely need to eat it all!”

Yaoyorozu’s eyes rounded at Kyouka’s and Ashido’s words, Yaoyorozu’s mother could hear their conversation which made her face light up with happiness.

“Anyways, we should hurry up and fry these! And let’s prepare a surprisingly big one for Kaminari.”

“That sounds great!” As Kyouka answered, Yaoyorozu’s mother stopped her and leaned against the oven.

Kyouka become self-conscious of her clothes again, and begin twisting her body around in discomfort.

I definitely shouldn’t have worn these clothes, Kyouka thought.

“As expected, this are some really amazing clothes.”

“huh?”

Kyouka couldn’t think of anything to say and just stared at Yaoyorozu’s mother in disbelief.

“Sorry for staring at you like that, a long time ago, a senpai of mine had a band and I joined also, and they used to wear the exact same thing, that’s why I couldn’t stop staring earlier.”

“But mother, did you not attend an all girls school?”

“Yes that’s right, but the senpai were really tomboyish, and I couldn’t help but join in too, they looked really good on me too! ahh this brings back memories.”

Just for a moment it looked like Yaoyorozu’s mother went back to the little school girl she was once before.

“…oh.” Kyouka felt a sense of disappointment in herself.

“Sorry Kyouka-san, did I make you feel bad?”

Kyouka smiles at the worried expression of Yaoyorozu.

“No, not at all, the opposite actually.”

“Opposite? really?”

“Yes, sorry for making you worry!”

It seemed like a miracle, Kyouka turns her head to the side to look at Yaoyorozu’s mother was still reminiscing about her past.

“Ah, that’s right! before I forget, we also have a cake prepared.” they pulled a massive cake out from the fridge as Kyouka and the rest stood and watched.

It was a beautifully decorated chocolate cake.

“wahhh it’s so pretty!”

“Did Yaomomo make this?!”

“Oh no, we asked our chef to do this, so I’m sure it’ll be guaranteed to taste good.” Yaoyorozu reasurred them with a hand on their shoulders.

“So let’s eat this cake and give studying one more try!”

“Yes! Let do this!”

Ashido couldn’t stop hopping up and down trying to get a glimpse at the decoration on the cake, Kyouka and Yaoyorozu turned to each other and smiled.

Yaoyorozu’s mother and their butler watched over their little flowers as they bloomed with a loving smile.

“Those guys, are they even studying?”

“It seems like they’re in a lot of trouble, especially Kaminari-san.”

“Definitely, he’s being a lazy slob.”

With the cake that was prepared, Kyouka and the girls made their way back to the lecture hall.

“Listen, lets scare them!” Ashido proposed as they opened the door slowly and quietly peeked inside, and to their surprise the guys seemed like they were having a rather serious conversation.

“The battle plan is called K…. and in just a moment, just a single moment, everything will be decided.”

“I don’t think sound would be a question… as expected this is something only you can think of.”

The unusually serious tone of Kaminari can be heard as Ojiro answers him.

“If it’s like this, shouldn’t we contact the supports department? The sound didn’t even come out of when the item arrived.”

“Even with the sound not coming out, you can’t deny how useful this is.”

Ojiro thought Kaminari’s proposal wasn’t such a bad idea.

This could be a really good countermeasure against the villains.

“…what the hell are they talking about? plan k?”

“A new costume?”

“What is this, it’s kinda of hard to enter with this kind of mood.” The girls were whispering amongst themselves, while Kaminari and the guys carried on with the conversation.

“Firstly, the issue of Sero and his tape, we have to make it soundless… and then mine and Sero’s timing, and then for destroying the evidence we’re going to need Ashido’s acid quirk.”

“Me?” She was surprised to hear her name and carried on watching in confusion.

Up until now, they’ve found out that Kaminari and Sero have been talking about using his quirk for something and then destroying the evidence.

ah, what if…

Kyouka notices that Kaminari is now brimming with confidence as he nods enthusiastically.

“Yosh! This is my ticket to the lodge camp, lets hope Plan K: Cheating goes well!”

“Haaaaaaaaaaa?! What are you talking about Kaminari-san!”

“Gehhhhhhhhh! Yaomomo?”

Without realising, Yaoyorozu has burst in and interrupted their conversation, the guys were shocked and their faces went pale.

They were planning on writing down the answers for the rest on Sero’s tape, they were planning on cheating!

Kyouka was actually amazed while Ashido was visibly angry with her cheeks puffed up.

“What is this about destroying evidence? I won’t be an accomplice in your cheating! That’s the worst!”

“You’re not just an idiot, you’re a huge idiot, Ojiro, Sero are you in on this too?”

“You have no shame.”

“Kaminari was pretty serious about this..he..”

As they were going about the conversation, Kaminari was trying to urge his appeal with teary eyes.

“You don’t understand, this is as much as I can do! Cheating is the only option I have left!”

Kaminari hangs his head and kneels in front of Yaoyorozu.

“Kaminari san, did you enter Yuuei by cheating?”

“n-no! Of course not! I just scraped a pass, that was too much of a grand exam!”

Kaminari was frantic, trying to make an appeal, searching for sympathy in Yaoyorozu’s eyes.

“If that’s the case, you should be able to do it this time around too, you’re a capable person… I believe in you.”

“Ya-Yayorozu senseiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!”

The warming kindness and affection of Yaoyorozu had melted Kaminari’s heart which had been iced over.

What is this..

Kyouka could not believe the farce that was developing before her etes, Kaminari had a complete change in heart as he wiped the tears from his eyes and hurried back to this desk.

“I’m going to do my best sensei!”

“Yes! That’s the spirit Kaminari san.”

“We’ll all do our best together guys!”

“Let’s do the test of courage at the lodge together!”

Once again everyone was united with the thought of attending the lodge together, they hurriedly went back to their studies.

Kyouka had already completed her own act of courage by accidentally biting into the cookie Yaoyorozu’s mother made, which she then threw into Kaminari’s mouth.

If only they waited a little longer, the delicious cake would have arrived.

THE END

#boku no hero academia #bnha #my hero academia #light novel #translation #yaoyorozu momo #jirou kyouka #kaminari denki #ojiro mashiro #sero hanta #ashido mina

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