#yeah childe probably did feel like zhongli was an asshole who used him!!

[pwurrz]

what?? no. no he doesn’t. he knew from the outset that childe was going to be sent to liyue harbour and stir up chaos. in fact that’s exactly what zhongli wanted him to do. why tf would zhongli feel betrayed?? while childe did technically use zhongli for information on rex lapis, he was only doing what was required of him by the tsarista for the mission of retrieving rex lapis’ gnosis.

zhongli was the one who lied about his identity and strung childe along only to use him as a pawn in his retirement plan. childe didn’t make friends with zhongli to eventually betray him because he had no idea that zhongli was rex lapis. but it could be argued from childe’s perspective that zhongli befriended him for the purpose of using him. in fact, that could actually just be what happened, because zhongli did want to make sure that childe was out of the loop and there was no better way to do that other than making sure of that himself.

anyway that’s why i think childe was completely justified in how he reacted and that his reaction does not make him a hypocrite. it’s clear that childe expected betrayal from signora and therefore doesn’t care that much, but he did genuinely think he was on good terms with zhongli and did not expect to be used the way he was. that’s why he’s so angry and that’s why he specifically asks zhongli why he’s not saying anything after making a fool out of him (paraphrasing).

and i don’t think zhongli is a jerk or an asshole from an objective standpoint. i don’t think he meant to hurt childe at all. and i completely understand why he did what he did. trust me i am a big advocate for zhongli retiring and taking care of himself. it’s completely possible that zhongli didn’t think of the effect his actions would have on others. which is unfortunate yeah but it doesn’t make zhongli a bad guy.

tldr the zhongchili breakup was just a big misunderstanding on both sides and the actions of both sides are justified. zhongli was justified in using childe to stir up chaos in liyue (because he didn’t have a choice, childe was assigned to the mission) and childe was justified in using zhongli to get information (because again, he didn’t have a choice. it was for the mission). because of that initial misunderstanding, childe might feel like his friendship with zhongli was just a lie, which would suck because zhongli is like his only friend, but if they talked to each other it would become clear that zhongli never harboured any ill intentions towards childe and didn’t intend to hurt him and i think they’d be fine.

[cheelduh]

How to get your crush to walk you to the nurse’s office (Highschool AU)

This is part 3, but it can be read alone!

Pairing: Childe x fem!reader

Warnings: Swearing, Mentions of a monster schlong, and unedited.

Parts: 1 2

Synopsis: Childe offers Lisa a shady deal to yet again sit next to you. However, all his efforts are in vain after he makes a complete fool out of himself by tripping over literally nothing because of a stupid cold. Maybe getting a cold isn’t so bad if he gets to be escorted to the nurse’s office by none other than yourself.

Note: Pure unedited crack luvs. Can’t wait for Childe rerun tmr I hope I get the ginger and the emo nun! 🥲💖

The eyes on you are suffocating, to say the least, enough for you to consider peeling a layer of your own skin off just to breathe. Every now and then, you get a teasing glance from a classmate, and you're sure you'll be an entire puddle of guts on your desk before home room even gets a chance to begin.

There's no doubt it's Signora that spread the news of your date yesterday as a means to some sick revenge. Knowing this was going to happen, you packed some salt in your backpack to cancel out all her evil. Now all you need is a chance to knuckle ball it in her face.

Fingers crossed, you pray to the archons that Childe didn't slip anything about your...brick slip yesterday. It's a good thing you weren't in a school uniform yesterday because that would've been the end of your high school life right there.

Thinking back to it, you collapse into your open hands. How could you have beaten a bunch up losers up...risking your flawless reputation for a sadistic ginger with an affinity for chaos? And worst of all, why did you care about them shit talking him in the first place?

"You okay dear? Something you want to tell me?" Lisa feigns concern, already knowing why.

With a sigh, you blink an eye open through the gap in your fingers. "Doing just fine."

"Oh it couldn't have been that bad." Her eyes shine in mischief. "I bet Childe was a real gentleman."

"He sure was." Kaeya pipes up from the back, leaning in to show you the image on his phone. It's a picture Childe took of you absolutely oblitering an ice cream cone.

You groan and slump deeper into your chair from embarrassment as Kaeya and Lisa engage in chatter, mostly revolving around your date.

Ignoring them completely, you start to ponder about Childe. Where is he? You were sure he'd be here bright and early to reminisce on your eventful date yesterday, which mostly consisted of a competition of who could win the most stall games at a local festival.

Maybe he'd even tease you about the Monoceros Caeli keychain attached to your phone. The very one he'd won for you, and the reason that started the competition in the first place.

Your cheeks warm when you fidget with said keychain, and you can't tell if the fast pace of your heart is because you're nervous to see him or because of the biology quiz you have second period.

So wrapped up in all these foreign emotions, you fail to notice the shadow that looms over you, a glittery finger guard tapping at your desk.

The student council President, Ningguang, plops down a stack of budget files on your desk during homeroom. She's gives you a light smile, and you know what's coming when you meet her alluring gaze.

"Be a dear Y/N," Ningguang smiles, tight lipped, all pretty with her hair pinned back to crown her face. "Even with all hands on deck, i'm afraid the student council's efforts will not come to ripeness concerning all of this paperwork."

This isn't the first time you've done her a favour by becoming the president's personal accountant, and it definitely isn't going to be the last.

Ningguang is powerful, with wit like no other, and you want to be able to call in a chit when the time comes.

"Of course," You reply with a smile that rivals her own. "I'll have them done by the end of the day."

"Excellent. I knew I could count on you, Y/N." She departs elegantly, probably opting to sit next to Beidou and bicker.

You're halfway on the third sheet for total income, a minute before class starts, when you're interrupted. Childe stumbles through the door quite noisily, a shitstain of a grin plastered on his face that is directed at you.

You sigh and shake your head as he approaches you. Thankfully the seat next to you is occupied by—

Shit! Where's Lisa?

Across the classroom, Lisa gives you a thumbs up with a bar of vending machine chocolate in her hand. You should've known she'd betray you yet again.

Childe slides in smoothly after bumping fists with Kaeya, and he falls short of containing his giddy nature.

"Hi Y/N." There's something weird about him today, because you're sure you haven't seen his cheeks so flushed ever. His eyes land on your phone, which is splayed on the desk, and the keychain widens his grin.

You snatch your phone and hide it in the middles of your thighs, but the damage is already done. The urge to shrink against the wall has never been as strong as it is in this moment.

"Hi." It's a miracle you haven't combusted on the spot. Is it usually this awkward? Everything went so fine yesterday, so why can't you ease into it today?

He takes that as a go ahead and instantly reaches for your hand on the table, but you retract at the speed of light.

"Don't even think about it." You're ready to connect the tip of your trainers to his bleached asshole, nose crinkled at his behaviour.

Kaeya whistles lowly, leaning forward for the HD show that is your life.

Childe's smile is sheepish as he's scratching the back of his head. "So we're not on that stage yet huh? I seriously thought you had a change of heart after you beat up those high schoolers for m—"

You muffle his statement with a hand on his mouth, and send a pointed glare to Kaeya. "You didn't hear shit."

The Captain of the skating team nods innocently, and salutes. "Yes boss."

Returning your gaze to Childe, who looks like he's having the time of his life with your small hand on his mouth, you narrow your eyes. "Stop trying to spread rumours."

He can only hum in reply, but you feel a weird pressure on your palm and—

The smug asshole kisses your palm.

You pull back your hand and wipe at your pants, full of disbelief. "Did you just??? Did you just? Kiss my hand???" Mouth twisted, you have no idea what to think.

Childe's throws his head back, and his laugh rings in your ears. You hate yourself for wavering slightly at the sound before smacking his arm. His laughs turn into coughs, probably because he may have swallowed his saliva down the wrong pipe. Charming.

Where the fuck is Zhongli? It's already been five minutes too long into homeroom.

Rolling your eyes, you opt to continue and scribble down budget numbers and add sums up or whatever you were doing earlier after Childe pipes down, choosing to admire you quietly by leaning his weight on one arm. It's enough to make you squirm, face flushed.

"Can you not?" Clicking your tongue in disapproval, you don't look up as you speak.

"If you give me a kiss, then maybe." Childe's cheeky, ridiculously so, and he points a finger at his cheek.

"I don't negotiate with terrorists." You deadpan, fingers itching to choke something or rather...someone.

Childe pouts, and then his eyes close for a second, almost as if he's exhausted when he gives you a sort of smile. With how he's leaning in so close, you can easily spot the swelling in his eyes and the paleness of his face.

For the first time today, there's no bite in your tone when you ask with a slightly raised brow. "Are you okay Childe?"

"Yeah!" He's quick to answer ecstatically, snapping out of his tired haze by straightening himself up. "Better more than ever now that I've seen you, girlie."

You blush madly, the compliment enough for you to drop your pen on the ground. It rolls over beyond your reach.

"I'll get that." Childe jumps out of his chair and you're unable to stop him as he goes to go fetch your pen like the chivalrous idiot he is. There's a slight pause in his movement, his body taking longer to process the messages his brain is sending.

He recovers from the muddle in his cognition by shaking his head, and casually goes to pick up the pen, then ends the move by falling over backwards in unconsciousness.

"Childe!" You lunge for him, managing to catch him a second prior to his ass hitting the floor with the help of Kaeya, who somehow looks like he's expected this outcome from the very start.

The entire classroom clamps up and turns to look for the root of all the commotion.

"Don't just sit there and watch!" You hiss angrily, waving them off. "Someone get Zhongli!"

Aether doesn't need to be told twice as Venti and him race down the hall together. Venti probably just to use this opportunity of sudden chaos to skip homeroom.

"Looks like a fever." The Captain accesses the situation as a small crowd forms around you two. "There's no way he didn't feel it in the morning."

"The absolute idiot." You groan at his words. "Of course he'd try to have a pissing match with a cold."

"I'm still here you know." Childe slurs, leaning into you for warmth, chest rising and falling softly. "Just a...a little sleepy. Am I dreaming angel?"

You roll your eyes, but don't make any moves to lean away from his touch. "Anyone got a water bottle?" Curling your hands around his shoulder, you shift your gaze towards the crowd.

Somebody passes you an emerald green water bottle with dandelion charms that clink against the hard plastic handle from a nearby desk. It screams stupid, but you don't have time to judge the owner.

Opening it up hastily, you're about to let Childe take a sip until it's snatched away from you at the speed of light.

"Hey what gives!" You call out to Kaeya, who inspects the bottle closely with his one eye. He then nods in affirmation as if his suspicions are confirmed.

"I wouldn't recommend it." Is all he says when he motions for you to take a whiff, which you do so reluctantly, eyes closed.

The scent hits you all it once. It's watered down vodka, except without the watering down. Tears form from the intensity.

"The goddamn bard." You choke out, and it earns you a drained chuckle from the ginger that has his head situated on your forearm.

He has half the mind to nuzzle in further, but the position is convenient enough for you to crush his skull if you wish to do so. So he refrains, albeit reluctantly.

Zhongli manages to make it in less than two minutes, sipping on a cup of steaming tea as he breaks apart the crowd to crouch down. "Is everything alright? I came as soon as I could after I made this tea. I assumed it was just another prank."

Everyone in the room shakes their head incredulously.

"Unfortunately it isn't a prank. Childe fainted briefly." You tell him politely despite the urgency, since you're whipped for all your teachers.

"I didn't faint!" Childe groans, exasperated. "Got a little dizzy s'all."

"Yeah," Kaeya cuts in to summarize the situation. "I'll be happy to take him to the nurses office with Y/N—"

Zhongli clears his throat. "You won't be going anywhere Mr.Alberich. I'm sure you have five overdue assignments in my class. Y/N here can walk him just fine." He then attempts to wink at Childe secretly like the wingman he is, but everyone in the classroom and their grandma notices.

The facepalm you do is not enough to render you brain dead.

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you sigh for the nth time today, and it's only eight thirty in the morning. "No worries, Lisa can help—"

"Sorry cutie. I'm manifesting for the biology quiz." Lisa deflects, lighting three candles on her desk unceremoniously with her eyes closed.

You don't understand why no one has confiscated her box of matches yet. This entire school is a law suit waiting to happen.

You succumb to the team effort everyone is trying so hard to display. "I guess I can go." The hall pass is already written, signed, and neatly folded into the chest pocket of your uniform. "How did you even..."

You don't even get a chance to finish before both you and Childe are whisked away to the outside of the classroom, the door shutting behind you with a slam. Your ears perk up at the sound of a lock clicking in place.

"Looks like you're stuck with me." The smug bastard still has the audacity to beam even when he's pale in the face. "Might have to hold my arm. If I fall and crack my skull—that wouldn't look too good on your record." He makes grabby hands, like a toddler.

The smile you give is unnerving, and with the speed of a snail, you manage to loop in your arm with Childe's. "Another word and let's move on to how your hospital record is going to have more than just a cracked skull."

"If you'd nurse me back to health, it'll all be worth it." The quip he sends without a beat lacks its usual goof, but it does manage to get some sort of reaction out of you.

"Whatever. Let's just get this over with."

—

Childe's busy thumbing at his phone while you pace at the foot of the bed, arms crossed with a frown etched on your features. You hope you don't look too worried, don't want to give him the wrong idea.

"Can we just get this over with?" He wails uncharacteristically from his spot on the white sheeted bed after ruling out everything he wanted to do on his phone. His hair is tousled more than usual, as a by-product of his constant restlessness.

"Shut up." You answer monotonously, arms crossed as you lean against the wall. "Let her finish her tiktok."

Barbara—the daughter of the school nurse, has her phone on the window, lip syncing and dancing to some music on beat as she films a tiktok with the utmost of important.

It's concerning that her father isn't here to tend to your needs, but apparently he's in the middle of a meeting with principle Varka. Said meeting had been going on for the past few months, but this school is devoid of logic anyways so nobody really questions anything.

"I'm literally dying here."

"Archons you're such a baby," Shaking your head, you approach his bed with a newfound annoyance. "Barbara has to create a tiktok at least once every twenty four hours or her fan club goes feral and..."

"Tries to jump off the roof as the ultimate sacrifice to her majesty." Childe sighs, and for the first time you sense his irritation. "Got it."

Just in time, Barbara finishes her cute little dance and comes over to where Childe is laying.

Childe doesn't miss the way your scowl has dissipated, and you give Barbara your undivided attention, hearts in your eyes from all the adoration. He has half the mind to call you out on it, no doubt a little jealous over how the young highschool idol can get you to show more emotion than him.

"I'm so sorry! I started those tiktoks out of mild interest but now I have an obligation to my fans." The younger apologizes profusely, getting to work almost immediately.

"No worries." Childe starts, staying still as the blonde examines him. "I'm sure it's nothing too serious. Y/N here is being dramatic, she probably just wants to spend some alone time with me."

You inhale sharply, turn to Barbara, and ask. "If I jumped out of the window right now from this floor, would it be a quick and easy death?"

The younger girl's eyes widen, and Childe stifles his snort.

"Kidding." You raise your hands up to cease her worries, and then motion towards him. "Common cold?"

"Yes," Barbara moves on and writes down something on a slip. "We'll just keep him here until his parents can pick him up."

"My parents can't pick me up." He asserts in a casual tone. "Don't call them."

"We still have to call them. If they don't come, you're to stay in this bed all day." She hands you the note, which is a viable excuse for all the classes he'll miss today. "Give this to his homeroom teacher. You'd also better get to class, your hall pass is about to expire."

"Hold up." You remark, barely paying attention to the note that you've shoved down your pocket. "I'm not leaving him here alone." There's no room for argument, your decision is firmly stated.

Childe hypes you up in his weakened state, disoriented. "You tell em girlie."

"He won't be alone." Barbara flashes you a reassuring smile. "I'll be monitoring him until his parents get here."

"No, no, you don't understand." You argue, inquiring all the doubts you have. "He's gonna try to pull some shit and I'll have to be here to stop him."

"Ease up babe." Childe tries to calm you down, despite the giddiness in his chest at the realization that you want to take care of him.

His subconscious begs him to let you stay, to let himself be doted and cared for the way he's always wanted you to, but he knows he can't let you skip class. Not when you've worked so hard and come so far. "I'll be okay for a few. You can go back to class and then visit me during break."

You bite your lips, head jumbled with all the different possibilities of how shit can hit the fan. "I can't! What if Signora shows up? She'll poison you in this weakened state to get back at me for trying to exorcise her." The hesitation in your features gives away everything.

Childe's eye twitches at the thought of Signora out of all people getting the best out of him, and also the absolute audacity you have to be calling him weak. Clearly all his efforts towards the little shows of dominance (e.g. Shoving Pallad against a locker, spraying a hefty amount of cologne on, being an asshole in general, etc.) have not bore fruit.

"You tried to exorcise her?" Barbara gasps, momentarily reminding the two of you that she's still present.

"Her evil has no bounds." Your expression is hard to read, dead serious. "I do not regret my attempt at cancelling Satan's hell spawn."

Childe himself has been cancelled hundreds of times over the span of highschool because of all his problematic traits (e.g calling Venti a twink) and it is not a pleasant experience.

Though it does give him a sense of comfort, knowing that arrogant bitch Signora is finally getting what's coming to her, even if she is one of his friends.

Serves her right for trying to Pavlov her stupid Chihuahua into biting the closest human being just by the snap of her manicured finger. As if it's persistent yapping and tendency to run in front of cars isn't enough torture to deal with on a daily basis.

Childe's yanked out of his thoughts rather forcefully at the sound of the door opening abruptly, the handle crashing into the wall, shocking Barbara's attempts to reassure you.

He knows who it is because of his top tier gaydar, dreading what's to come.

Scaramouche is a morose son of a bitch with a mean streak that hasn't been broken since he was an itty bitty shit in the fourth grade.

"I can't believe you let yourself get sick!" The navy haired boy exclaims in disbelief, doubling over with tears, clapping his hands to add on some extra effects. "Natural selection finally decided to stop pussy footing around your primate-looking ass."

You press your lips together. "Isn't he supposed to be your best friend?"

Scaramouche sputters violently, using the wall as leverage to hold himself up. "You told her I'm your best friend? Oh fuck. Oh this is good. What else did you tell her huh? That you have a monster cock?"

"First of all, you make me reconsider my opinion on the death penalty, dickhead."

Barbara is mortified. Childe continues on anyways.

"—and I do have a monster cock. But why are you so interested in my monster cock huh?"

Scaramouche scrunches his face up in disgust, amusement nothing but a distant memory. "You don't have a monster cock you plebe."

Childe has an awfully scandalized expression on his face, but smoothly enough it transitions into an unsettling grin that you're all too familiar with. "You didn't deny not being interested in my monster cock though."

It's your turn to be mortified, shaking your head at the banter that goes on back and forth.

"How did you even know he was in here? We aren't even in the same class."

Scaramouche raises a brow as if you're some sort of toddler that's babbling out a mixture of Cheerios and spit, maybe a few digested strawberries here and there. He waves his phone in front of you, "posted it on his story."

"What the—give me that!" You snatch his phone right up, staring at the screen in bewilderment.

There's a video of you doing trick shots with your tech deck on the ledge of a nearby window with a pressed expression while waiting for Barbara to finish up, captioned with: "In the nurses office rn pray for me 🙏, there's this cute girl in front of me should I ask her out?"

You check the poll and ninety five percent say yes. Scaramouche voted no. You have mixed feelings.

Shaking your head, you give Childe, who's unable to sit still, a look of pure exasperation.

Scaramouche claws his phone back from you rather harshly, the bells on his hat jingling, making it hard for you to take him seriously when he sneers your way.

"You should be thankful you're the lover of my comrade." He shivers slightly at the word comrade. "or I would have obliterated you on the spot for that little stunt."

Childe doesn't even pretend to look fazed at the older's threat when he says  "as if I'd allow a kumquat headass like you to touch my girl."

You and Barbara hastily jump in to stop the bloodbath that is seconds from happening. "No!"

Luckily, no limbs are teared apart.

[mrpenguinpants]

Also. I love this screenshot

I finally FINALLY finished the story quest so I can reply to this lol. I'm only how many months late?? But I'm here now and ready to slap the whiteboard.

@5aph join us at the round table

Note: I'm going off Mihoyo's cutscene trailers so Lumine is the "evil" twin and Aether is the one we play.

---

Honestly, I think we've been pretty spot on with our theories. Maybe not the specifics but in general we have been. I still believe in the theory we made last time where: because Khaenri'ah never had a God, they had to find a way to survive in a different way. Creating machines and using alchemy/khemia instead of visions or having an archon.

Now it's confirmed that Dainsleif used to be a part of Khaenri'ah and worked as some sort of guard (PRINCE KAEYA AU WHERE) but this makes me wonder. If Khaenri'ah was already going to shit when Dainsleif was "mortal" how the fuck is Kaeya okay?? Was Khaenri'ah just a shit place to live and that caused his father to take him to Teyvat to save their already ruined world? It's been 500 years so were their just a group of humans somehow living? Or maybe Khaenri'ah is separated from Teyvat and therefore, time passed faster/slower?

Honestly, I think the Unknown God was talking about how Khaenri'ah people were building machines that were stronger than vision holders (according to Dain and Mr.Wolf). If Record of Ragnarok has taught me anything, it's that God's are assholes. Plus if you think about it, that's kinda how the electro archon is. Venti doesn't really care about his Archon duties and Zhongli found empathy/humanity through Guizhong but I fully believe in Dictator Zhongli if Guizhong never existed. I'm assuming that Khaenri'ah people were oppressed or were getting a bit too cocky, either accidentally turning themselves into monsters through khemia or the gods did that themselves, then Unknown God appears and you know the rest. Or maybe, and hear me out, the beginning cutscene we see is a timeline where the Travellers actually succeeded in their mission to help Khaenr'ah. But because of our arrogance to change destiny, we got sent back and everything was either undone or the Unknown God threw everything to shit while we were asleep. Once we woke up, everything was already ruined and etc.

But either way, she probably destroyed Khaenri'ah. Her powers are these cube things, right? And during the flashback with Lumine overlooking what appears to be Teyvat or Khaenri'ah, we see those same red cubes. But there were definitely more Gods, especially if we are going all the way back into the past. I remember Zhongli/Archon war, there were numerous Gods fighting each other. But I think she might be a part of Celestia (maybe like a guard, the same way as Dainsleif?) and not one of the original Seven but I could be completely wrong. Every Archon seems to have an element and she doesn't, plus her cubes trap people and who knows what else.

Maybe it's because I've been reading Tokyo Revengers but this feels like an "I'm going into the past to change the future". Instead of Aether + Paimon, it's Lumine + Dainsleif and they go through the same journey as us. All the stories we hear from Barbara might have come from when Lumine first travelled through Teyvat. I definitely think that the first sibling tried to save Khaenri'ah but failed and using the second sibling (aka us), they are trying to re-write the destiny they experienced. The one where everything goes to shit.

I definitely believe that both Dain and Lumine had the same idea. They wanted to stop the Gods and they both dislike them. But due to some unfortunate incident, Lumine became "corrupted" in the sense that the "end justifies the means" while Dainsleif wanted to rely on himself and not involve others. So they separated and that's why even though the Abyss Order and Dain share a common goal, he's actively fighting against the Order. Plus, considering that this was in the past, I would assume that Venti/Zhongli aren't the same happy/calm people like they are during our adventure. Plus I think Paimon is a better friend compared to Dain when it comes to emotions too.

As for the Tsaritsa, yeah I would agree that she is trying to do the same thing. We're not 100% sure if she's trying to wage war against Celestia or there is an ulterior motive but Childe did say that Tsaritsa wasn't a bad person. But honestly same?? Where is Venti + Zhongli in this?? Give me more lore crumbs plss.

Now the upside-down Archon statue. We see the statue chained up and the symbolism is literally screaming in our faces. perhaps this is something Khaenri'ah people did because they had no archon? Not exactly the same way since I don't think they could lug a giant statue away but using Archon objects to draw power to use them as a catalyst? Re-watching the cutscenes, apparently, they are using the statue as a base, attaching osial's limbs to construct a mechanized god. Since the statue holds abyss power which corrupted Dvalin and it was strong enough to kill a human (like we saw with the thief) it makes sense.

It makes you wonder how Dain got his immortality. Perhaps he was going to become an Abyss Herald himself but something happened, maybe Lumine stopped his transformation since they used to be partners. Or dain is just an op bastard and broke free and fled. I'd like to believe that during the fall of Khaenri'ah, instead of helping the people he simply watched which caused Lumine to feel betrayed and that's why they went their separate ways.

I also want to point out that our twin is using the same sword that we saw during the opening cutscene. But I think I'll stop here since this post is long enough lol. Ty for being patient with me (❤´艸｀❤)

[softzhongli]

summary: a closer look at the most exclusive group chat in all teyvat. we have two oblivious idiots in love, two horny bastards afraid of their feelings, a grumpy cat and his sunshine boyfriend and one very single and tired girl... among many many others warnings: swearing, probably some angst info: crack fic, multi-chaptered, social media au, not much difference they just have phones lmao pairings: childe x kaeya // xiao x venti // zhongli x diluc + lumine and other characters requests: open posted: 12/02/2022 a/n: i wrote a written-fic part for xiaoven and chaeya so i couldn’t just leave zhongluc without one and here we are haha also! thoma, welcome to the chaos! tbh i don’t really have an idea for him as of now but i just wanted to add someone new so we’ll just go with the flow lmao

PREV II MASTERLIST II NEXT

CHAT: #AntiKaeyaGuild ⮡  members: lumine / diluc / xiao / venti / childe / kaeya / zhongli / thoma

lumine: @kaeya you asshole

kaeya: hello to you, too

lumine: why didn't you tell me you're in liyue????

kaeya: sorry, mom

lumine: bitch

kaeya: and how did you know I'm here?

lumine: I've run into childe a few hours ago and figured out

lumine: that the "things" you were busy doing were in liyue

kaeya: details 🙄

kaeya: are you still with childe?

lumine: yeah

kaeya: tell him to come back

kaeya: I'm lonely 🥺

lumine: ew

lumine: you're awfully clingy for someone who's NOT in a relationship

kaeya: and how would you know that?

lumine: i'm taking childe away from you

lumine: fuck u

kaeya: lol try

kaeya: @childe babe come back to bed, I'm cold

kaeya: also

kaeya: we were supposed to do that puzzle together!

lumine: omg

lumine: I've never seen two "single" people being more married than you two clowns

childe: omw

lumine: HE'S LITERALLY RUNNING

lumine: ISTG

lumine: imagine being this exited over doing a puzzle together

lumine: 🤢🤢🤢

kaeya: weren't you supposed to be with diluc anyway?

lumine: did you really think I'd spend time with diluc here?

lumine: he was gone as soon as we stepped into town

kaeya: zhongli simp strikes again

lumine: lmao

diluc: could you PLEASE stop talking about me

lumine: he said please and it still sounds like a threat

kaeya: this gives me strong venti's "I'll destroy you if you disturb xiaoven time" vibes

lumine: aw baby diluc's on a date with his sweetheart zhongli, so cute

diluc: @lumine you're banned from angel's share

lumine: wait, no!

kaeya: lmaooo

childe: @kaeya you wanted me back here, stop texting

lumine: he's already there? damn that simp's fast

lumine: I'm surrounded by weak simps and it's disgusting

childe added thoma to the group.

lumine: 😳

childe: you were saying?

thoma: oh, hi guys!

thoma: @lumine it’s been a while!

lumine removed thoma from the group.

kaeya: OMG

childe: lmao

diluc: that was rude

lumine: shut up and go drink wine with your future husband

kaeya added thoma to the group.

kaeya: sorry about her

kaeya: she's just like that

thoma: she seemed rather cool when we met

childe: love the blooming friendship and all but @kaeya put the phone down we're busy

thoma: oh, you're finally together? congrats!

childe: ...

kaeya: bye

kaeya removed thoma from the group.

childe: ???

lumine: WHY????

lumine: 😭😭😭

childe added thoma to the group.

lumine: WHY WOULD YOU REMOVE THOMA, MY BELOVED

lumine: oh...

lumine: ☠️

thoma: #StopRemovingThomaChallenge?

kaeya changed group name to "THOMA MY BELOVED 🖤"

lumine: I'LL SHAVE YOUR HEAD

lumine: childe won't be able to hide you

lumine changed group name to “R.I.P. KAEYA ☠️”

childe: lmao this group chat changes names at an alarming pace 

thoma: im so confused

diluc: better get used to it

zhongli: yes, they're rather an interesting bunch

diluc: by the way @zhongli sorry for being on my phone so much

zhongli: i don't mind

"But next time you can just say that to my face." Zhongli chuckled slightly and Diluc's head immediately went up to look at him.

“Sorry.” Diluc mumbled, putting his phone away. “The notifications were bugging me.” He explained himself quickly.

“Like I said. I don’t mind. But I must admit, I do prefer it when I have your full attention.” Zhongli smiled and if it was possible, Diluc would definitely melt in the spot. That smile was, without questions, something he loved about Zhongli the most.

And yeah, he did love Zhongli. It wasn't really a secret. He never truly denied it when someone - Kaeya or Lumine most of the time, was teasing him about his feelings. He just didn’t like being put on the spot like that. More concerned about Zhongli’s reaction than anything else. He wasn’t a little kid anymore, or in this situation, he wasn’t like Kaeya, who just played dumb to run away from his feelings. No. He was quite sure and secure in what he felt for the man sitting across from him right now. 

The problem was, he didn’t know what Zhongli’s feelings were for him. Zhongli was one of the nicest, kindest and overall one of the best people he knew. And it was a good and a bad thing. Of course, it’s good to be friendly with everyone, to make others feel good on your presence but on the other hand... Diluc was jealous. As much as it hurt him and his pride to admit, he was jealous of all those people Zhongli was close with. Because it didn’t help the mixed signals he was receiving. Just like in that moment, when Zhongli said he likes to have Diluc’s full attention. With the intensity of his gaze, then tone of his voice and that smile... how could he not hope for Zhongli to meant in a more than just a friendly manner.

“Then you shall have it.” Diluc said eventually, after all those moments just looking at Zhongli in silence. Desperately searching his calm, warm, beautiful face for any signs of hinting at something more. “So. What do you think about the wine?” He decided to change the subject, the satisfied smile Zhongli shown him, suddenly feeling a little bit too suffocating, and his own face blushing unnecessarily hard.

“It’s very good. As always. You have yet to disappoint me with whatever you bring me.” At this point Diluc was sure the smile on Zhongli’s face was not going away and as much embarrassment it was bringing him he was almost proud it was his company that brought it on.

“I hope the day never comes.” He said it too quickly, he knew he was too eager but he just couldn’t help himself. The thought of Zhongli’s disappointed face scared him and made his heart clench. He truly wished he’d never have to see it.

“I’m positively sure it won’t. You could never disappoint me, Diluc.” Did someone just shot him straight through the heart? Diluc wouldn’t be able to say and it wouldn’t even matter because the way Zhongli said his name almost made his heart leap out of his chest and run to Zhongli. It was where it belonged and there was nothing Diluc could do about it anymore. No other person in this world could made him feel the way Zhongli did.

It was almost three years now since they’ve met and almost two since Diluc’s heart first skipped a beat just at the mere mention of his name. Throughout this time Diluc took every opportunity to travel to Liyue whenever he could. Didn’t matter if it’s a work stuff or like this time a commission with Lumine. Any time there was a chance to come here and see Zhongli, Diluc took it without any hesitation. He was quite worried Zhongli might find him bothersome but it never seem to be the case. He was even first to extend an invitation to Diluc on several occasions.

It was impossible not to fall in love with Zhongli. And he knew he wasn’t the only one who fell victim to his charms but - and it might’ve been just Diluc’s wishful thinking, but he felt like he was, for lack of a better word, special to Zhongli too. He just didn’t know in what way. Was it the same for Zhongli as it was for him? He had no idea and the biggest problem was that even after years he still wasn’t ready to ask and hear the answer.

“Should we take a walk?” Zhongli’s voice pulled him out of his head but the glowed hand gently laying on his own clasped hands, short circuit his brain for a moment. “It’s quite embarrassing to admit but the sunset always reminds me of you.” Was he purposely trying to cause Diluc a heart attack? Because it was certainly heading in that direction and Diluc almost wanted to slap himself across the face when he thought it wouldn’t be a bad way to go. “The sky takes on those beautiful colors, almost the same shade as your hair.” And Zhongli said he was embarrassed? Because right now it looked like Diluc was embarrassed and he was more than sure that the sky’s not the only thing in the same color as his hair. “I’m sorry. I hope I’m not making you uncomfortable.” Zhongli added somewhat cautiously, not breaking the eye contact. And Diluc was impressed with himself that he wasn’t the one to brak it despite all the things Zhongli said.

“No!” Diluc raised his voice surprising both of them. “You’re not I’m just... uhh, I’m just not used to the compliments.” He admitted and tried his hardest to ignore the warmth that flooded his face.

“Oh, that is a shame indeed.” Zhongli hummed. “Beautiful things should be appreciated.” He decided, squeezing Diluc’s hands a little.

Yup, Diluc was ready to die. There was no way he could win or come out of this alive.