#yeah I'm not 100% in love with the coloring yet still working on it

[corrodedbisexual]

Wish I could say I'm being productive making gifs but really I've just been staring at Eddie's profile for 15 fucking minutes god fucking dammit why is he so beautiful

[sycamorality]

@ceruleanstarbreak okay SO

making this a post bc i love yelling about scavengers.

quick note bc im not sure where else i'd put it: eyes are either really dark, really light, bordering on white or a solid inbetween vibrant color, at least from all the scavengers i've seen and can remember.

the most common colors are grays, whites, blacks, browns and oranges - colors you'd usually see in animals irl like cats or dogs. the rarest are yellow (actual yellow and not an orange that looks yellow) and cyan. accent colors (this is just a term i use - but i use it to refer to the color that sometimes appears on frills/spines and as eartler deco, and on occasion the belly) of these two are much more common than body/head.

i have a folder of the first 11k scavengers (+ a few extra above 11k if they had colors like blue/etc so the numbers are a Little inaccurate but i think they work just fine), and the color commonality (is that a word?) goes as follows: orange - 142* pink - 100* blue - 70 red - 42* ** green - 33 purple - 32 yellow - 0 cyan - 0 *there may be more/less, this is my own view on colors. **there might be more, i'm not sure if i organized all of them yet, i wouldn't be surprised

not counting gray/brown/etc because those are extremely common

all scavengers have heads that are darker than their body, however, there is something called bodyblack that makes the body darker, and sometimes this causes the head to be lighter than the body, because techncially the head is still lighter than the body. 973 is a VERY good example of this!

scavengers also have arm blend - it is always the head color, but can sometimes look like it isn't because the blend doesn't go all the way. (their legs and tail never have a gradient) and we can't forget eartler deco! to my knowledge (i don't exactly know everything about scavenger code but i do know at least a decent bit from observing a whole bunch), eartler deco can be the same color as the eyes, or be a completely different color. eartler deco color can also be used for spine blend (which means the spine blend can also match the eyes or not), even if the eartler deco isn't visible on the scavenger. 6194, 7491 and 4572 are good examples of this!

their head color tends to not stray too far from their body, but sometimes, they do stray pretty far from it! i've noticed some combos are much more common together while others just don't exist at all (to my knowledge of course - i don't know every scavenger but i've seen a whole bunch of them). here's some examples!

whole bunch of interesting combos, yeah? the ones that are more wild like the last three are usually much rarer than the ones you see reoccuring (like the pink/orange + blue and pink/orange + green). sometimes the belly can also get an unusual color (and i'm not exactly sure how that works, it tends to seem like it has a color of its own and tends to be lighter than the body, and on occasion seemingly match the head but not exactly).

now i can really mostly only comment on 0 through 11k, but other combos i've seen (listed [body color] + [head color]) are:

white/gray + green

white + pretty much any* color

cream + pretty much any* color

yelloworange + purple or blue

red or orange + dark brown

gray + purple or blue (most commonly, but any* color is possible)

any pale color + its brighter/more vibrant variant (like pale purple + bright purple)

...and probably more, but they usually tend to match together well, unlike mr no scavnificant harassment (51620372) over here.

now, usually scavenger frills are rather. well, normal looking, and sometimes they just get SUPER frilly, but other times... they can get a little weird!

these are the best examples i have on hand right now, but i think they suffice well enough. 3222 looks like a hunchback, and 1646 has frills that do quite literally float off its body, as does 8804 (while also just having an interesting shape to them). of course there's also the frill colors that can theoretically be practically anything, and those also get wild pretty often

now these aren't the wildest i know of, but they're the ones i have images on hand of.

the rest i can't really comment on at length is the eartlers, 'teeth' (weird little shapes by their mouth) and head shape. sometimes eartlers are really thick and tall, really thin and small, or somewhere inbetween. sometimes scavengers have eartlers on the bottom of their face and sometimes they don't. sometimes two points on the eartlers visually 'merge' together, which is mostly visible if a scavenger has eartler deco, because it still applies to the separate points.

that should be all! unless i forgot something... in that case, oops, my shitty memory strikes again.

[citrus-writing]

Hi!! I’ve got some thoughts about yandere!Neon x nen-user + bodyguard!Y/N that I wanna share with you

It all started with something like: "She’s pretty, I want her to be my bodyguard!" Yeah, she liked Y/N just as a "decoration" that’d look good next to her.

Later, she wanted Y/N to be her friend. Moreover, it was important for her that it was Y/N who first suggested that she go beyond the relationship of “bodyguard and boss”.

Neon is spoiled by her father. She gets everything she wants, so maybe she’d think that Y/N's favor can be bought with expensive gifts. Her first gift was new clothes, because according to her, Y/N's old clothes didn't fit her at all! One of Neon’s last gifts was a ring with beautiful pink gemstone (Neon’s got the same, but with gemstone of Y/N’s eye color).

After some time, her sympathy grew into an obsession and a desire to be the only one who owns Y/N's heart and mind. Neon's father burdened Y/N with more and more responsibilities, which led to Y/N starting to feel like a maid(wife) rather than a bodyguard.

At this point, it's too late to try to get rid of Neon. Now she will never let go of her beloved Y/N!

If Y/N already have got a lover, Neon’ll ask her father to kill them.

Also, I think Neon is romantic. I'm 100% sure that if she falls in love, she'll be like Illumi in some way—it'll be important to Neon that Y/N acts according to her vanilla fantasies. However, the punishments for long-term "disobedience" will be her tantrums and scandals. (Also Neon's wishes are much more obvious than Illumi's XD).

I’m sorry for mistakes, eng isn’t my first language and I was a little nervous while writing this

Thank you so much for sending this in, it was a joy to read! I was so inspired I had to sit down and write something out immediately before my thoughts got away. Please don't be nervous to send me things! 

You’re 100% right about neon, her spoiled and bratty nature makes her a doting and controlling yandere who needs constant attention from her beloved darling.

 I may actually write some more stuff for yandere neon, because I think she’s perfect for it. 

------------------ 

I’ve always loved the idea of neon falling for someone who works for her, either as a bodyguard or a maid, it feels natural that someone like neon- who is always surrounded by people she could be considered above- would fall for someone who works for her and who is paid to put up with her. Because she has so few friends, or even people who care about her, I can imagine her getting attached fairly easily. 

Afterall, you’re a breath of fresh air to her, as you're likely not involved in crime or the mafia, and you're brand new to her life. She sees you as somewhat innocent, not unlike herself, and she wants to protect you, no matter how strong or capable you are. To neon, you're a kind person, and people like that need to be protected and looked after. 

I imagine working for neon would be draining; she totes you around like your her newest handbag, showing you off to anyone who will listen, eagerly dressing you up in outfits to match hers, eagerly buying you gifts, even when you say you don't want them. She insists you be with her constantly, throwing tantrums if you try to take days off. 

Her presence is suffocating- but some part of you still feels bad for her. Neon is a girl who is treated like an object by everyone around her, and because of that, you feel sympathy for her. Sure, she’s spoiled and bratty, but deep down she’s a nice girl with a big heart- you’ve seen firsthand how loving she can be towards those she cares about-- even though you haven't seen the half of it yet. 

Despite neon being your boss, it’s possible you may actually start to see her as a friend- even with her obsessive tendencies, neon can be very sweet and endearing, and it’s possible she may win you over by being friendly with you. She buys you gifts, expensive things she knows will impress you, but you're more impressed with how she always seems to know what sort of thing you’d like- it’s like she knows you better than you know yourself. It’d be creepy if the gesture wasn't so kind. 

The ring neon gets for you is beautiful- pink gemstones that glitter in the light, but you feel you can't accept it, afterall, this must have been expensive, and it was more so the kind of thing you would buy a lover than a friend. But neon insists it’s fine, that she bought it just for you and she wants you to have it. How can you say no? It takes a couple days before you notice she wears a matching ring on her hand as well. 

Neon is a lot like illumi, in several ways. 

First, they’re home lives are a little bit similar- both coming from families involved in crime, both possessing nen abilities, and both being rather wealthy. 

Another way they’re similar is the desire to make you a part of their family- both neon and illumi would desperately want you to like and get along with their families. They both share a fixation on the idea of marriage, neon’s gifts of matching rings is the first hint that she desires to be your wife. 

Neon craves a domestic life with you, one where you can truly love her as she’s come to love you, one where your days are filled with nothing but each other, as are your nights. She wants to spoil you and dote on you, and any refusal of her wishes is met with tantrums and fits. 

So just play along with her, it’s easier that way, and deep down, you know that. 

[dark-frosted-heart]

Aphrodisiac Event - Roger Barel (epilogue)

Here I am translating the epilogue 3 months later because it lives rent free in my mind.

Premium end to recap

Awkwardly translated smut ahead. As usual can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this. I’ve already slapped a community label on this but minors dni

He poured the aphrodisiac into my mouth, wiped his wet lips, and smiled wickedly.

Roger: Tell me what that special feeling is that isn’t a brain dysfunction or sexual desire.

Ba-dump. My body heated up and I lost my sense of awareness.

It was as if I became a beast craving for Roger in front of me.

Kate: Why did you give me drink the aphrodisiac again?

Roger: So that cute and lovely Kate craves for me.

Kate: You…egoist.

Roger: Woah there, you doin alright?

The moment he steadied my body, unsteady in my delirious state, Roger’s scent made me dizzy with excitement.

Roger: Ah, even after gettin’ you off, your nipples are still so perky. C’mere, Kate. There ya go…

He picked me up with ease and plopped me down on the table in the drawing room of the palace.

Roger then threw the night dress hanging around my waist to the floor as if to say that it was in the way and stuck his hand down my underwear.

Roger: Kate, sit up for me. Uh huh, that’s a good girl. Should’ve taken your underwear off sooner. Just look at how soaked it is…

Kate: Please don’t…say stuff like that

Once I was as bare as the day I was born, Roger grabbed my ankles, planted my feet on the table, and spread my legs wide.

Without looking, I could tell what was happening just by the sound of my legs spreading.

Roger: Haha, what a mess. How'd ya endure it when you’re this wet?

Kate: Ah…Don’t stare so much.

Roger: Don’t wanna. Look, you’re getting wetter just from me staring. How naughty.

Roger’s large palm rested above my heart as he gazed down at my arousal flowing between my legs.

Roger: Your heart’s racing. This the special feeling you were talking about?

Kate: No… There’s no special feeling between us yet.

Roger: Hmm, well this is gonna be a problem since that special feeling you’re talkin’ about us love.

With a smile on the mature face, Roger sank his fingers into my wet core.

Kate: Ah…

Roger: You like my fingers there? You’re squeezing me tight.

Kate: Ah, there…

Roger: Alright, I’ll touch you there. Must feel real good having me press there.

With how Roger sought out all the best spots, it was like he knew every inch of my body.

Roger: Hey, Kate. I can't define how I feel about you, but... I don't like the idea that some other guy's touched you here.

(Huh)

The moment his eyes flashed a ferocious color, he worked his fingers in and out without mercy.

Kate: Haaaah

I felt like I was drowning in Roger's intensified scent as he held my head against his solid chest

Kate: Ah, I can't anymore

Roger: You're trembling...Come on, cum for me again. Come on, Kate.

Kate: Aaahhhh

Her body shakes as she cums.

Kate: Ah...I...

Roger: Pfft, hahaha. Cute... I got hard 'cause you're so cute.

Roger removed his belt and took out what was tenting his pants.

(It's huge...)

Roger: Sometimes they worry. But if I slow, it'll fit. Hey...You wanna go all the way? Or—

(Ah...)

The tip of something hot and hard prodded against my dripping wet entrance, and my heart pounded loudly.

(I can go all the way like this with Roger...)

(But)

Kate: We only go all the way...if we love each other.

Roger: I don't believe in love though?

Kate: Then I'll make you believe in it...

Roger stared at me for a moment and then narrowed his eyes.

Roger: Pfft, haha...Alright, bring it.

(Huh, what did I just...)

With a suggestive smirk, Roger tugged my arm.

Roger: Kate, put your hands on the table. Good, and turn your ass toward me.

Kate: Eh...Um, this position.

When he pressed up against me from behind, I felt something hot between my legs.

Kate: Roger, it's touching...

Roger: Yeah. Don't worry, I'm not gonna put it in. But since I got hard, let me take care of it. I know you're aching too.

Kate: Eh, ahhh

He grabbed my waist from behind and I felt him rub back and forth between my legs.

Roger: Ngh, haaa...Kate. Close your legs...a bit.

(This makes it feel like I'm...doing it with Roger)

Kate: Aah, Roger, don't...

Roger: Don't? Really?

Kate: Haaa, ahhh

He pinched my nipples from behind and my arousal overflows from between my legs.

My body rocked back and forth in time with him and I couldn't think of anything else.

Kate: Don't go in...ah...Roger...

Roger: I...won't. It's what I said. Honestly I'm holding back from thrusting inside you. Aren't ya glad I'm an honest guy?

(Honest? Since when—)

I didn't have the energy to talk back.

When he looked over and saw my tears of pleasure and frustration, he licked them away.

Roger: Haha...You really are cute, Kate.

--

When I woke up the next morning, I found myself in my bed in Crown's castle.

(Even after all that, there's not a single hickey...)

Surely Roger's nonchalantly continuing his research right now.

(I wonder if Roger will ever have any special feelings toward me)

(But...is that even possible for him)

I flopped back down on my bed as I thought about it.

[deadend-if]

This is just to give you guys a better idea about the game!

Where is this taking place?

The MC, A, and S will start in the city they live in together. M will also be there, but you won't meet K until Chapter One starts (sorry). Once Chapter One starts the rest of the game will be in the underworld!

The underworld? Which one?

Great question!!! All of them!!! I have taken my inspiration from... so many things. I'm sure there is a depiction out there similar to mine, nothing is original or something? It will get explained in the game but it can't hurt to give a little summary of it! The underworld is surprisingly easy to reach if you know where to look. The old doors are deep within catacombs and cave systems, but in the modern world, it becomes a problem to bring massive amounts of souls down twisting tunnels and tight passageways. So, when the subway system was implemented in big cities around the world, the denizens of the dead decided it worked for them, too. The underworld became the city of the dead, built with skyscrapers that reach toward no sky, and streetlights that have no stars to outshine. At the lowest level, souls are in turmoil, writhing in memories of people and tasks they left behind. The highest point is occupied by misty, formless wisps who have left behind everything they knew and loved to seek an audience with the Council of Rot. It's a crooked city of souls that linger on the cusp of something new, or something old. Hardly anyone knows what happens after the dead are done being, well, dead.

What kind of customization will the MC have?

You'll be able to choose your name, pronouns, gender identity (trans or not), hair color and length, eye color, height, college major, room/apartment decoration/general style, and smaller details like tattoos, freckles, glasses, etc. MC will also have different job options, though limited, along with some choices on their backstory, mostly focused on death and family dynamics. You can choose why S has a rivalry with MC, one-sided or not. I am also adding a childhood pet choice! And if you ever have an idea on something small to add to the customization feel free to let me know! I'll do my best to accommodate it, but I'm still not great with twine lol...

What are the non-customizable features of MC?

There will be limited choices for your background, job, and rivalry, but I'm hoping to leave a lot of options on the table for your MCs. That being said, your MC will always have a neutral-to-good relationship with A and a neutral-to-bad relationship with S at the beginning of the story. You will also have a set age (27) for various reasons. There might be more later, but I want to keep a lot of options on the table for you guys. The ending may seem a bit rail-roady (I don't know 100% yet) so I want to leave a lot of wiggle room for other things.

Personality Stats? Skill checks?

Yeah, so there won't really be "skill checks" in the typical sense, whoops. This story will have personality choices and some other variables that will change the game, but there won't be any failing/passing checks or rolling dice. MC's personality stats will affect flavor text and it will be the classic types like stoic, cheerful, shy, bold, etc. Your most game-changing stats are going to be MC's feelings on death and attachment to living. You determine A's fate, and maybe everyone else's, too. Who knows? :)

On the topic of NSFW and RO asks

The main reason I'm not including NSFW in this IF is because I genuinely don't think it would fit well in the plot at any point. That plus the fact that I, myself, am asexual... I don't think I could even begin to do it justice lol. It would be just... cringe guys, you wouldn't even want it. I can't really say anything though, I'm writing romance while also aromantic :/ I intend to keep this blog and the story away from anything NSFW. While I, personally, don't care about those asks, I want to create a space without NSFW topics. I'm also wary of people asking NSFW questions about asexual characters (Mortimer/A). Romance/SFW asks/scenarios/prompts about worldbuilding or ROs are totally fine, and I will be sososo happy to answer them.

Updates and Timeframe

Guys... I hate to break it to you... but I may be slow on the updates (shocking, I know). I want to write as much as I can, but I am also a college student writing this on a whim. I love this story, I've been thinking about it and scribbling ideas for it for about 2 years now. I don't want to abandon it, but there may be long stretches of silence sometimes. I WILL say something if it goes on hiatus or goes dark completely, I won't leave you hanging! This story will go through a lot of changes, I change my mind about things all the time, so you may be getting a lot of random updates of me changing (seemingly) unimportant things, sorry in advance. Lowkey might take years to write this :)

This will update with time! :D

[herotome]

Finally-official-devlog #112

Also known as FOD112 hi-ho, Wudge here.

Gosh there's just. So much. I'm actually drafting this devlog a few days early so that I'm not suddenly overwhelmed on devlog Tuesday again. But without further ado-

This is the big cheese right here -- each character has their own layer, each character's clothes and expressions have their own layers, and there's a separate layer for the soft orange lighting on top of it all. 😭

On that note, here's most of the individual image files that create the CG with their powers (and my code) combined:

And since this is a cropped version of a BIGGER CG (featuring ALL the love interests sitting together), I had to tinker with the position code a great deal to properly feature these three goons Of course it was worth it of course twas merely at the cost of all my energy and sanity at the prospect of eventually possibly also adding in blinks and expression changes--

Mad props as usual to the sweetwonderfulamazing Remnantation who first completed this CG -checks watch- sometime last year! With some additional edits by me since then~

And, did you happen to notice something new in the lower right?

Tadah... a brand new click-to-continue icon animation! I made (mostly) all by myself! The lil sparkle burst is free from production crate, but I drew the star and added the rotation code... ... Honestly, the hardest and most time-consuming part of this was finalizing the design. Originally I was gonna make it rotate 45 degrees, flip, rotate 45 more degrees, flip, etc-- and messed with that concept for several hours before scrapping it for a simpler, more graceful idea. :| Part of the process, I gots to tell myself, part of the process...

Next up is Jade's powers, as you may have seen in the preview last week. Much like the CTC animation, I did a lot of research on other ideas - various glowing VFX like vertical veins across the cheeks and smoky rising from the eyes, as well as a bigger low opacity character zoom effect - before settling on something simple. Jade's power usage here is... pretty mild in context, and I figure I can always store the more dramatic animations for later in the story.

Here's a still of the effect btw:

Her eyes look like headlights lmaooo. Honk honk!

Do I have more to update with? Believe it or not, yes.

I made some icons, which took a fair amount of trial and error: on the left you'll see an earlier draft, on the right are my more final redesigns from the same day(...night. midnight. I worked on these until midnight).

I had to look up some guidelines because most of my previous icons did NOT look good or legible when sized down to 50x50 pixels. What I learned was, tadah, I had to draw with an unprecedented line width of 200 pixels! (For non-artists: I typically draw with a pen width of 12 pixels at most).

I also studied the icon styles of Persona 5, which saved me a lot of time - they had a cool stylistic choice of diagonally tilted color blocks and thick black outlines.

Here's yet another gif of icons in action...

Did you see them? Did you?? For a split second, in the upper right.... Still gotta adjust some of the text overlap, don't look at that.

Oh and the "How to play" page is brand new. I coded it from scratch... That also took all night...

... Oh. Oh. And remember your MC's phone?

This old thing? Yeah. Visual upgrade:

Also rendered and colored in by Rem <3 Where would I be without them...!

The text, though, can be updated in code!!!! I spliced the phone into layers, with the screen on top and code-generated text just below it, so I can update the caller ID at any point in-game without making any new images.

Took a little while to get it to work... honestly it doesn't look 100% centered... but it's fine. This is fine...

And then... more code. After much tears, blood and strife, I got a musical crossfade to work. It shouldn't have been challenging but it was a nightmare -- when calling the crossfade the second track would either not play at all or its volume wouldn't change and I was starting to develop a preference for eating gravel. But I persisted, found a much simpler code that actually works. After the tearsbloodstrife.

And...... lastly... I simplified this big block of code:

vbox: pos (269, 76) add "sprites/MC/mc[mc_number].png" hbox: if mc_number ==1: text "DEFAULT" style "MC_label_text" elif mc_number ==2: text "LAVENDER" style "MC_label_text" elif mc_number ==3: text "PETUNIA" style "MC_label_text" elif mc_number ==4: text "SUNFLOWER" style "MC_label_text" else: text "TBD" style "MC_label_text"

...(not properly indented bc tumblr is mean 2 me)...

down to these lines, to make my future life easier:

default PrintMC = ["Default", "Lavender", "Petunia", "Sunflower", ""]

text PrintMC[mc_number] style "MC_label_text"

Two!!! lines!!!!!

🎊

Instead of typing out additional if/else lines, I only need to add new names to the PrintMC list. Won't really affect the player at all, but it's a HUGE quality of life update for me!

...Anyway that's it, thank you for checking in. <3

Stay safe and keep warm,

Wudge.

PS screw it I'm gonna queue post this early.

PPS have you listened to our composer's new single yet? No?!?!?!

Every click, every listen helps, and every song of his is a BOP that deserves recognition!

ok that's all for real now xoxoxo,

wudge (again)

[mintmoth]

OKAY I'm gonna do a big ask response here! There's a few I didn't grab which are mostly just people saying sweet things- to which honestly I can't thank you all enough 😭 it's so wild to me to see people enjoying my art so much

I'm gonna keep most of the replies under the cut since it's gonna get a bit long but I wanted to touch on this one real quick-

Absolutely anyone is free to use my art as an icon wherever! Just be sure to have something crediting somewhere and yeah absolutely go for it!

OH ALSO my submissions don't work on mobile for some reason? The formatting messes up I guess, but check out this awesome coloring!! I love how the layers of shading look 😭

LMAO okay so I've seen a good handful of older/mafia au designs for Floyd and Jade and a lot of them have either both of them with double sleeves or Floyd with sleeves and Jade with a back piece- though I've also seen somewhere both of them having one sleeve on the opposite side

Right now I'm just messing around so I don't have any official tattoo designs for either of them, but I do know I want Floyd with at LEAST the double sleeves, and Jade with some pieces he keeps hidden by mostly wearing business attire lmao

XBSISNK THANK YOU 😭😭 honestly drawing hair is one of my absolutley FAVORITE things to draw lmao, most of my ocs have long hair I just can't help it honestly

YES ABSOLUTLEY probably not too often but I could definitely see Azul going to bed and waking up to a very full bed lmao. Funnier yet because I think all three of them are the type to cling in their sleep when they have someone else beside them. They're just weird sea creatures used to small comfy spaces

I actually haven't thought about this! Honestly I think that would be really cool! Or even if he found that he had a specific shade range of color blindness as a human- though I could see Jade and Floyd taking advantage of that by doing something like giving him the wrong color shirt to wear that day or something lmao

Though you also reminded me! Eels also have terrible eyesight! So I've seen people both having the headcanon that the twins wear contacts, and also the headcanon that Azul needs glasses now because he did a deal to give part of his vision to both of them

Honestly it's really cool to think about! I don't know which headcanons here I like the most, but I love seeing them

Okay honestly I absolutley have to draw this because I LOVE this idea and part of why I'm answering this is to mentally catalogue that I need to draw this lmao

I also love this idea! Like at lunch, after classes before they go to work at the lounge, and after the lounge closes up for the night it just becomes the twins' gossip hour lmao

Because yeah they do spend a lot of time together, but they're still apart a lot, and there's no way they're not telling each other about all the nonsense they're getting up to once they meet back up

DBSISNSK DONT CRY LMAO I got a handful of questions about Niles I want to try to touch on here

Absolutley he wouldn't mind helping anyone set up games on their computer lmao, especially if it's a hard to get visual novel that he's a fan of because he's the type to want everyone to play and love the games he loves

He's definitely dropped hundreds of hours into "creature crossing" with one of those islands with tons of customization and cute shit, and his "island creatures" are mostly cats with a couple dogs and the pegasus LMAO

Also while he's not directly inspired by any specific character, since he's in Ignihyde he does have a little Greek mythos theming and has some inspiration from Eros, which is also why he's very "love" themed/romantic

OH MAN I'm actually not 100% sure which moray I think the twins would be, I'd have to look more into them specifically

But I did want to mention that my idiot self is tempted to make Yet Another Oc (though I probably won't post this one since I feel very oc heavy already) that's also a moray- but specifically a snowflake just because wow I want to make a design around the coloration they have 😭

ALSO!!! Regarding Eel Anon!

I wasn't able to screenshot everything you sent but it was absolutley fun hearing about the dorm idea you have!! I love hearing about new dorm concepts and I've seen a couple nightmare before christmas dorms so it's neat to see the different ideas people have! Also no way do Eri and Rika sound like knock offs of the twins lmao they both sound really fun and I like how they juxtapose one another- also how you have their whole family worked out??? It just reminded me I need to do some more backstory work for my group lmao but honestly it was really cool reading about them so don't even worry about long asks or anything!

[elvenbeard]

2077, November

"Heeey... All good? What're you doing out here, so early?"

"Couldn't sleep... Wanted to watch the sun rise."

"Well, here I am!"

2077 was a hell of a year. It left its marks, mental and physical, trauma and scars alike, memories and lack thereof. A year ago Vince was working at Arasaka, desperate to stay in the corporate world despite it slowly destroying him from the inside out. A year later Arasaka is only a shadow of it former self - and in a way Vince felt like a shadow, too.

Six months had been Alt's prognosis, at most... then he'd die. For good this time. Vince knew the drill. But he also knew he would try everything in his power, utilize all means possible and necessary... Because yes, 2077 had been one hell of a year, of loss, despair, betrayal and pain... But also of hope, trust, friendship and love, and connections, however unlikely they may have seemed.

The road ahead is still long, and it will be far from easy. But he is at peace knowing he won't be walking it alone.

Vince through the years (9/9)

Aaand the series is complete! ;A; Ending it on a somewhat bittersweet note with a few of more pictures this time cause look at them looking at each other ;___;

Vince has always been a deeply lonely person trying to find his place and purpose - as you'll surely have gathered reading along this far. By 2077 he finally finds his people, real friends in the most unlikely places, that he cares about and that care about him. And after how badly his previous relationship with his Arasaka-coworker Shou ended, he wouldn't have expected to get another shot at love, too. I definitely feel like he found a soulmate in Kerry, very scared in the beginning that his feelings for him were only brought on because of Johnny, and should he get rid of Johnny he'd also lose the connection to Kerry. He didn't though, thankfully. Vice versa, Kerry found someone who really understands his loneliness and struggles and takes them seriously. They really match very well on many levels and bring out the best in the other (on most days at least :P), something I neither planned for nor expected, and probably why I'm so obsessed with them at the moment XD They really are each other's sun, driving away shadows and doubts, a light in the darkness.

But yeah, Vince has a lot to lose really, and together with Kerry and everyone else they try and find a way to solve the Relic-problem so now that he found his place and people he can stay with them, live the balance of quiet and exciting life he deserves and always wished for.

The scars I gave him here (and damn, it hurt me to make them 😭) are not 100% canon yet... I'm gonna explore and explain what they are and how he got them in my post-ending fic soon-ish.

But yeah... V gets his happily ever after with his loved ones, in one way or another, and CDPR can take my headcanons from my cold dead hands xDD No but really, I get it. In a world like Cyberpunk there's no such thing as a sunshine-and-rainbows happy ending with world peace and all... and even mine is gonna come at a certain cost. But if anyone, V deserves some peace and love after that shitshow :D

That being said:

Before and after! The scars are drawn on, and I used the relief layer effect in Photohsop to give them some dimension. Was really a matter of playing around with colors and layer modes to make them somewhat convincing looking, but I'm really liking the result a lot!

Once again it gets me how different Vince looks without his iconic hair and makeup 😭 Believe me, he had a really really hard time when he was told "we gotta shave your head for this procedure" cause throughout his life his hair has been a really important part of his self-expression. From dyeing it blond as a teen to rebel against his parents, to going completely wild afterwards, conforming to Arasaka, then slowly finding himself again... With everything gone he felt like yet another part of him was gone and yeah... wasn't a good time, that time in late 2077.

If you've read along all the way: thanks so much!! I hope you enjoyed this series as much as I enjoyed creating it and sharing a bit more about Vince's background and how he became who he is. When I'm done writing my post-ending fic I might go back to writing and sharing his background story fic, detailing everything from this series a bit more, and you'll get to know some of the people I only mentioned in passing (his mother, his first real boyfriend, his coworkers, etc.) a bit better, too.

So... Thanks for sticking around!! :D

[stupidrant]

imagine a sunny day in jotunheim, in angrboda's treehouse. atreus has been on his travels and brings back souvenirs not only for his father, but for angrboda as well. it's been maybe two or three years since ragnarok. atreus has been quite busy finding clues about the giants outside midgard, sometimes it lead to dead ends, sometimes he succeeded, sometimes he's gravely injured while on his journeys and he has to postpone the travels so he can go heal himself. but it's an ongoing process, and still many questions lingering. he doesn't give up!

here's the thing, though... neither atreus and angrboda have confessed to each other yet. but everyone around them are screaming inside that for the love of skadi, JUST SAY IT ALREADY!

one sunny day in jotunheim, atreus appears with new pigments from far off lands that will help angrboda's paintings pop even more. angrboda is overjoyed, because the pigment she's been using doesn't fit the new piece creating. she was so frustrated and annoyed that no matter how she mixed the colors, it never worked or didn't look as appealing. an artist takes their craft seriously! atreus knows this of course.

that's why he's there, because he knew it's the perfect gift for her and also... an excuse to simply see her. be with her. angrboda catches him looking at her for a while. "all good here, champ?" she jokes. "of course, i'm just enjoying the view. i missed you a lot. more than anything."

that made angrboda's heart jump out her chest. she feels the same way, thinking about him when he was gone, wishing he came back. this one time she heard the yggdrasil portal opening and got so excited over the premise that maybe atreus is back, she damn near ran to greet him - but it turned to be just lunda. ('now, why are you so disappointed in seeing me, missy!' no offence lunda, it's. complicated. well not really but you know; UNSAID WORDS & EMOTIONS GALORE.)

"i, uh... missed you too. it's so amazing to see you again, atreus..."

words are failing them hard, how do you even begin with describing just how they're feeling. but maybe they don't need words. they both try to speak, but the tension is thick, the heart rates are going up, palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, mom's spaghetti-

so they get closer. and closer. until they close the gap between. he has his arms around her waist, and hers are draped around his shoulders. their first kiss together, and it was purely magical. it was steady, sweet, wonderful.

until it deepened and they tumbled down. oh it's going for another territory. word to nelly, it's getting hot in HERE.

however...

they stopped. both of them. heavy breathing, their faces completely flushed.

"h-hey, atreus, um... this is very great but i don't feel... ready for this yet." "no, yeah, no, totally! i understand...!" they got up immediately and dusted themselves off.

a small moment of awkward silence. "angrboda... was it- was this okay with you? you don't feel weird about this, do you...?" "no! not at all! i liked it, but um... i, uh. i've never been... you know... with a guy-"

"OH WELL LOOK AT THE TIME I HAVE TO MEET MY FATHER BY THE SEA. TALK TO YOU LATER!"

"WOW THAT'S GREAT I ALSO JUST REMEMBERED THAT I HAVE TO FIND MORE PLANTS. FOR GIANT STUFF."

"I LIKE YOU!"

"I LIKE YOU TOO!"

"I MEAN MORE THAN LIKE!"

"SAME HERE!"

"BYE!"

"OKAY, BYE!"

meanwhile, somewhere around yggdrasil, ratatoskr was tending to the tree until he heard a young man scream. it was atreus. yelling while he was running laps around the path. currently at his 56th lap and at this rate he will hit 100.

"young master atreus! what is going on-" "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ICANTBELIEVEITICANTBELIEVEITIDIDTHAAAAT!!" "young master atreus, get a hold of yourself!"

back in jotunheim, angrboda is also screaming. but it's muffled by a pillow. and she's rolling around the grass, kicking her feet, laughing and giggling. her wolf and fox friends are looking a little bit concerned. but she doesn't look hurt, and she's clearly happy, so they're not alert. they won't rip the guy she was seen with into pieces, thankfully.

but oh. it's finally happening.

😭😭😭😭😭

[hananoami]

[ Directional Orbit ] Fire - Stage 110 Clear VOD

I cleared Rafayel's Directional Orbit: Fire - Stage 110 yesterday, 05/15, in the most unorthodox way possible; more details about that below. For now I want to give an overview of this stage for those who have yet to reach this far. Stage 110 requires two teams. The Protofield Stellactrum for Team 01 is 6-Pearl memories and for Team 02 its 6-Violet memories. By having a perfect match with the colors for the Protofield Stellactrum your < Resonance Skill > can break 2 Protocore Shield Layers in a single strike and increase DMG to weakened by 100%. For every matched Stellactrum you'll receive an attribute bonus that increase DMG Boost by 5.0% and DMG Reduction by 5.0% (up to 30%). I want to reiterate that there is no right or wrong way to play the game. You should use whatever you have available to you. My game play will differ from yours, but I still wanted to share my experiences and offer tips for the trials. With that said, please feel free to contact me if you ever need advice~ I'm super shy, but I'm always happy to help others. ଘ(੭˃ᴗ˂)੭♡

Oh boy... how long was I stuck on this stage? The earliest post referenced was recorded on 04/24 so it's been three weeks. Within that time a LOT of resources were invested into my Violet and Pearl builds. This includes leveling up memories, farming protocores, and leveling up said protocores. I wrote a lot of entries about those upgrades, but you can find them all under my #directional orbit fire tag. I have countless hours of game play footage, showcasing my attempts to figure out what worked for me and how could I improve. Even in my clear video you can see where I had to cut my failed attempts out as I was constantly restarting the second half. It's a satisfying feeling to see how far I was able to progress. Unfortunately I don't have an updated screenshot of the final team set up in the overview page. However, the only difference would be switching the solar pairs. Team 01 will use the Violet solars [Deep Sea Riches] and [Deep Sea Promise] and Team 02 will use the Pearl solars [Temple's Promise] and [Temple's Sunset]. No other changes were made; all of the lunar memories remained the same. Team 01

After switching things up a bit I went into the first half of the fight with Abysswalker Companion using Phantasma Sands. Previously I was able to auto battle this part without any issues. Having a perfect match meant my resonance skill was able to break 2 protocore shields in a single strike, making it easier for me to bring those wanderers to a weakened state faster. However because I opted to go off colors it took me a while longer where I had to manually play. At first I was struggling clear the fight. There were many attempts with me timing out and the wanderers had around 1 and a half or less HP left. I didn't feel like leveling up [Myths] any higher than lv 40 cause I wanted to save leveling resources for Zayne lol... This is when I decided to use more core energy resources to build up my protocores. I used up 20000 core energy exp to level up a pearl delta (CRIT rate) to +12 and another 20000 core energy exp to level up a pearl beta (Expedited Energy Boost) to +12. I don't remember how much gold I spent on the top of my head, but it was still a decent amount invested. Yanno, even with the core upgrade I still died a lot and failed right after LOL. I don't remember which one of the two wanderer types that puts a ticking debuff on you to take damage, but they stack and your HP will DROP without realizing it. Pretty sure it's a reflective damage from the one that has a shield around it. So every time I was attacking it I was also kms... 🫠 Thanks InFold. So yeah, I would try to be a bit mindful about what you're attacking. If they have a shield up that's doing that you can usually dispel it with interrupts/charged attack or bringing them into a weakened state with resonance skill. I love Abysswalker's kit because it groups them up so nicely before Sharky comes and bites them.

Team 02

The suggestion to use God of the Tides companion for he second half and keeping his lunars the same came up in a conversation I had with a friend after a talking about my meme of a run for open orbit - stage 120 (you can read more about that here). After being stuck on this half for over 3 weeks you'll try anything with hopes that it'll actually work. I had zero expectations on how it was gonna turn out but fortunately for me it did well after a handful of failed attempts! Prior to my clear run I tapped a violet delta core (CRIT rate) from +9 to +12 that had HP bonus as one of it's substat. God of the Tides is an HP talent memory so I wanted to make the most of it by having that extra bit of stats to make up for missing 10% attribute bonuses. I was already focused on increasing my CRIT for this build, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to commit to upgrading this specific protocore. Upgrades are expensive y'all. The stats before weren't as ideal imo which is why I was hesitant before taking the gamble to roll HP bonus %. I know my clear vod made it look easy but what really happened is that I somehow managed to crit harder during this run compared to all my failed attempts earlier (╥ᆺ╥；) CRIT rate is king, especially if you plan on ignoring the Protofield Stellactrum by going off colors to try and brute force things.

The following are my final team set up and their stat attributes--

ADDITIONAL SCREENSHOTS

Companion: Rafayel’s Abysswalker Weapon: Phantasma Sands ♡ Affinity Bonus: 92 When you take a fatal blow, Rafayel teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 3600 || DEF 90 || ATK 180 ] Pair Bonus [AB] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, and reduces team DMG taken by 8%, and increases Crit DMG of Deepsea Persuit by 30%.

5☆ Deep Sea Riches (violet/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 2 using +9 SSR protocores

5☆ Deep Sea Promise (violet/solar) Lv 80/awakened using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆Tipsy Invitation (pearl/lunar) Lv 60 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Fireworks Vow (pearl/lunar)

Lv 60 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Before Sunrise (pearl/lunar)

Lv 60 rank 1 using +9 SSR protocores

4☆ Myths (pearl/lunar) Lv 40 rank 3 using +9 SSR protocores

Companion: Rafayel’s God of the Tides Weapon: Tidal Embrace ♡ Affinity Bonus: 92 When you take a fatal blow, Rafayel teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 3600 || DEF 90 || ATK 180 ] Pair Bonus [TP] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, reduces team DMG taken by 8%, and increases Crit DMG by 10% when fighting along side Sea Spirits. - Duo Rank 1: boosts Ardent Oath charge by 20%. The starting level of Sea Spirits rises to Lv. 2, and Sea Spirits will last for 5 more seconds. - Duo Rank 2: increases Energy Charge cap by 1. During Heavenly Rain, recovery rate of energy charge is increased by 30%.

5☆ Temple’s Promise (pearl/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 2 using +9 SSR protocores

5☆ Temple’s Sunset (pearl/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 2 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Your Fragrance (violet/lunar) Lv 80 rank 1 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Whispers (violet/lunar) Lv 80 rank 1 using +12 SSR protocores

4☆Ivory Nightfall (violet/lunar) Lv70 rank 3 using +12 SSR protocores

4☆ Hidden Shadow (violet/lunar) Lv 70 rank 3 using +9 SSR protocores

[saltbind]

tag game!!

tagged by the lovely @serpentmessmer

Do you make your bed? i will just kinda nudge the sheets back into place but its mostly for my cat. i ain't tryin' too hard tho i do not spend much time out of my bed in the first place

What's your favorite number? 7, 13, 23, Good Numbers

What is your job? i relay calls for folks who are deaf/hard of hearing/have speech issues

If you could go back to school, would you? if it was free i absolutely would i love learning. alas

Can you parallel park? bruh i cannot even drive yet. i'm. working on it

A job you had that would surprise people? i don't think any of my jobs would surprise anyone, it's all retail, hospo, admin and call centre stuff. nothing weird in there really. oh, i worked at a non-emergency police call centre once for a month. it was terrible

Do you think aliens are real? yes, but considering i have a phobia of them i would like them to stay far away til i work through that shit

Can you drive a manual car? i cannot drive any car :)

What's your guilty pleasure? i try not to feel guilty abt pleasure as my prev mutuals have said, but i do feel indulgent when i get to have a nice long bath (no bath in current unit so it's a hotels only kinda thing rn)

Tattoos? one so far and many planned. however i will have to get my one covered up bc it's to do with Magical Children's Series Whose Author Turned Out To Be Shit, and as i am trans i don't rly want it on my skin anymore lmao

Favorite color? phthalo green!

Favorite type of music? when i was younger i was a biiiiig metalhead and i am still very fond of it, but now i'm into darker sounding stuff with fun synths and basslines. spotify says dark pop and alt z is what i listen to a lot of, idk about that but it sounds correct

Do you like puzzles? i adore puzzles. i love escape rooms especially

Any phobias? just aliens rly but jokes on you if you send me any to freak me out bc i'm desensitizing anyway

Favorite childhood sport? the Autism means my hand-eye co-ordination has been shithouse my entire life, however i did martial arts for a while and started when I was like 12. so i'm counting that bc it was v fun. i was also surprisingly good at dodgeball, possibly bc being shit at sports meant i was dodging balls in all the other sports too

Do you talk to yourself? not out loud a lot but internally yeah i got a dialogue. out loud is reserved for my cat

What movies do you adore? i like horror movies and movies with whatever actor i'm fixated on. idk i don't know if i adore movies so much as they get hooked inside my brain until i've watched them enough to recite them. the movies that i have been moved by i usually only watch once and that's a different kinda love. i have movies i'm married to (inception, deepwater horizon, etc) and movies that are (as stephen king would say) a kiss in the dark from a stranger (donnie darko, the lovely bones, million dollar baby, etc)

Coffee or tea? tea 100% the smell of coffee makes me nauseous

First thing you wanted to be when you grew up? as a baby baby i wanted to me a marine biologist, then a herpetologist, then a drama teacher who was also an author, then an actor, etc. this was all before age 10.

tagging @monstraduplicia @jellybracelet @hellhoundlair

[a-force-dyad-in-space]

A Fanfic Update

Hey guys, I thought I should give you an update about what's going on Ongoing-WIPs-wise just in case you've had some worries.

The short of it is that the writing juices haven't flowed well for a while now and I'm trying to get them back but it is a struggle. I've worked a bit on this fic or other but haven't made significant progress in a few months. I absolutely hope that will change soon but I unfortunately can't force it. It doesn't help that I'm going through some stuff IRL right now that I have to take care of (I am unfortunately an adult who has to do adulting and pay bills and shit 🥲). I try not to be too stressed out about it, but the more time passes the more the anxiety sets in. Wish me luck. 💪🏻

Anyway, here's a fic-by-fic overview, split up by fandom.

THE UNTAMED

The Angsty SongXue Fic — I'll be honest, I've written a little bit since I last updated you guys but I still haven't finished the buffer chapter (at this point I'm thinking about posting chapter 51 even though 52 isn't done yet), so nothing really new here. I really want to get back into a writing flow but so far it hasn't really worked. I am still working on it, though, so don't worry, I'm not going to drop it.

The It Follows AU — I'm ashamed to say I didn't even realize I posted that fic almost two years ago and I still haven't written the second half. I'm so sorry it's taking so long! I definitely still want to finish it! I might rewatch the It Follows movie before I do that, though.

The Observer Series — Oh yeah, remember that smutfic series I started a few years ago of which I've only posted part 1 so far? Yeah, I still need to work on that. I did write chapter 1 of part 2 a while ago, so it's not like it's forgotten, I just need to get my ass up and write the rest of part 2 before I can post it. 🙈

The Color Rush AU — Okay, technically I haven't posted that one yet but I did share a snippet along with a gifset a few years ago, so you guys know it exists. I haven't worked on it in a long time, though, and I don't know yet when I will find the spoons to continue writing it but I'm still intrigued by the premise and want to give it a go. Thank you for your patience!

The Somewhat Sweet, Somewhat Angsty XuanXian Fic — Again, haven't posted that one yet but I've been posting about it, so you guys know it exists. Nothing new on this front. I did want to rewrite the whole thing because I wasn't really happy with the way I wrote it thus far, so I'll probably go back to it at some point and do that, I just don't know when yet.

WORD OF HONOR

The Xie'er Deserves the World Fic — Listen, guys, I love this fic so much, I just haven't worked on it in a while. I'll probably re-read what I've written so far and go on from there, I've just been struggling with the latest chapter ever since I started writing it years ago. It's not dropped, though, I will get back to it! Pinky swear!

SAILOR MOON

I've mentioned here and there that I'm working on part 1 of an epic that is based on a doujinshi I started when I was 13 or 14. Unlike my other WIPs, this one really is 100% self-indulgent to the point where I don't even care whether people will read/like it once I post it when it's completely done. I'll just put it out there to make my teenage self happy because this story has been simmering in my head for over 20 years, and so that my IRL friends can read it if they want to. So, this one will be a long way out, but it exists. I'm only really mentioning it because I've mentioned it a couple of times before and because it's the fic that's been on my mind the most lately.

STAR WARS

You didn't think I forgot about TROBS, did you????? I did work on several beginnings of a draft during NaNoWriMo last year and I'm getting more and more of a clear picture of how I want it to go. For those unfamiliar, TROBS (or The Rise of Ben Skywalker, though I already changed the name of the fic again) is my attempt at an Episode IX fix-it fic that essentially replaces TROS. This one has been simmering in my head since early 2020 and I really want to get it out of there and onto the page for catharsis. I've even held off on reading any other TROS fix-its because of it, even though I've heard there are some really amazing ones out there (and I can't wait to read them once I've gotten my own out of my damn head). I really need to finally finish that beast. Wish me luck. 🥲

UNPOSTED WIPs

I still have so many notes for other fics (mostly for The Untamed) that I want to write at some point. Will I be able to get them all on the page? I honestly don't know, but I'll see where they take.

Anyway, that's all!

[beevean]

(Same IDW Silver anon still) Yeah no actually I'm putting some more thought into the whole "No, genius. Whisper is her name." part, and what the fuck. There would have been SO many ways to make that line come off as less dickish; hell, the simple act of having Sonic playfully SMILING while he said it would have been so much better than the irked, annoyed face he pulls now. Sonic, that is your friend you are talking to, and I would call their circumstances at that moment hardly warranting of such annoyance towards Silver not understanding something that inoffensive. I'm thinking of 06!Sonic and Silver meeting with Silver's resolve having changed and him just bluntly going "Circumstances have changed. I need to rescue the Princess.". What does Sonic do? Nod, thumbs-up, and let Silver go along easy and with no fuss. No quips and jerkish statements that indicates he thinks Silver is being a dumbass, merely checking out the situation with a "You look like you're in a hurry. So what's going on?". If you look closely I believe you can even see Sonic smiling in that moment! With that in mind, I truly cannot envision that Sonic and IDW!Sonic to be the same person, legit. I read your response to my earlier post just now after typing the above, and yep, Sonic's thing about his 'over-eager friend' is just also kind of mean. And the literal panel on the next page after "No genius", wherein Sonic does his smug little bow and calls Silver 'Flatware' while asking him to open the door? Also that is yet another jab towards Silver (I think; I don't even understand what flatware is supposed to mean in this context. It's literal definition is something akin to cutlery, it seems? Regardless, I doubt it is anything kind-spirited). It's a shame because I can see so many ways wherein Sonic could have been more friendly while changing so little dialogue, and both he and Silver would have been much better off for it personality-wise.

I think the Flatware joke is supposed to be at best a pun about his name (because good flatware is made of silver) and at worst a jab at his quills that might resemble a fork. Probably the former. Still mean.

Sonic in that issue just sounds like that "friend" who thinks the height of humor is lowkey making fun of you.

"You had to bring the mood down", "I'm Sonic, and my over-eager friend here is Silver", "No, genius, Whisper is her name" (said with a cringy grimace), "care to get the door for us, Flatware?" (mocking bow). Silver even rightfully says "no need to rub it in". I'm sorry, I feel bad for him! Yes, Sonic is snarky and playful, but he never crosses the line where he sounds meanspirited, and if he does, it's when he's 100% sure that the other can dish back, like in that cutscene in Colors where he playfully states that he did all the work and Tails was like "oh I didn't see you build a translator now, did you?". That moment is nice because Sonic and Tails are very close friends and no one is offended. If Tails had been more insecure, Sonic would have immediately apologized and propped Tails up, because it's what Sonic does: he lifts people up!

And it's just with Silver, because he's actually pretty sensitive with Whisper! He immediately understands, without even knowing her, that she's a reserved person who doesn't like interacting with people. He's very respectful of her preference to stay on her own. So it's just an attempt of making Sonic sound a jokester, but the jokes aren't funny.

anyway sonic and silver should interact more and sonic should be nicer to him. I loved a recent fanart of the two discussing about nature together :)

[leggyre]

You got any adivce for someone who's considering dropping drawing completely since they don't like what they're making at all?

honestly i've been in the same struggle recently bc it just hasn't been a good year for me. i haven't been drawing a lot bc most of the time i'm either sick or i just.. can't. I've been picking myself up as of late and it's a really difficult grind, but honestly the fact i've been able to actually start this grind is already good for now. I guess that counts as advice; be patient with yourself. Self-esteem doesn't come easy and the little steps are worth so much more than you think.

ok so uh,

-if you just started, don't think about it too much. we all start with the weird scribbles. if you stop now you might never get back to it -if you've been trying to doodle often and always end up hating the result, just take a break. art block is seasoning for burnout and you might just be tired. a lot of times i've felt bad about my art i kinda "gave up" for a while and when i came back to it it was like "wtf this easy what was my issue (it was burnout)". so take a break, play some videogames or hang out with your friends for a week. idk write essays about the media you like? it feels like you're being unproductive but resting IS part of productive because just pushing yourself will just result in nothing being done at the end of the day. -look at your favorite work! im not quite out of my latest artblock yet because its a tough one(it's been teaming up with depression caused by health problems it suuuuucks :/), but when i went long enough without being able to draw I kinda started feeling like I can't do shit and can't call myself an illustrator at all specially bc what i do isnt that big of a deal compared to others(<- comparison also big mistake remember youre the only one who can make YOUR art), going through my folders and seeing the stuff I like the most gave me a LOT of motivation to keep going, even if I was still unable to start drawing right away. not giving up is so important. -so yeah love your art. focus on drawing things you like because it's a gift from you to you, and you should treat it as such. i know it's really hard to be positive about it all the time but it can be really good to go through all your artwork at the end of a day and look at the things you like about it, even if it isn't much. -on that note, find something you really like drawing!!! back in high school i had massive periods of depression that kept me from drawing but i occasionally found sort of a 'life hack' for myself which were things i was always able to work with even during the worst times. one of them was just.. bees. i just doodled random characters as these bees and made og designs too and it was fun. the other one was using colored pencils instead of a regular one bc i just like colors and it made me happy :] it didnt matter that they always had the same overall shape or if i couldnt erase when i messed up, i was just feeling good being able to draw something that i liked. -experiment more!! expand your palettes and download some new brushes. i even change from my newest to my old busted tablet that still sorta works occasionally because using a tool that feels different is.. refreshing somehow? idk -when you need to get yourself back up, do the little steps at your own pace. do a little doodle every day. it's okay if it's always the same thing. the same character. the exact same idea. it's okay if it sucks or if it's unfinished because you struggled. Just give it little pushes. What matters is to try. and it's okay if you can't do it every day. maybe every other day if you need a slower pace. -and remember. engagement doesn't measure your skill. art is subjective anyways!!!!! i spent YEARS doodling and posting only my ocs and getting little to no notes. i think one of my favorite artworks from the time i had ~100 followers had like 0 notes for the longest time. to be honest i don't even know if it has any likes at all nowadays i'd have to look it up bc it's a bit buried

[lesbianwyllravengard]

Hell yeah i got some recs!! Most of mine are going to be more Hank and Connor or Reed900 centric, so keep that in mind.

From it's Own Wreck by Jivvin is my current favorite! It's a ghost au based on the film Just Like Heaven (2005) and it's full of gorgeous writing and has lots of great moments in it. I can't recommend it enough. It is incomplete, but the author regularly updates and it's a few chapters away from being finished.

Deviating and Solving Crime with 100% Human Detective Connor by CaptainKenway. Exactly what it says. You're solving crime with a 100% human detective, nothing else. Nothing suspicious about him. 0_0 It has some good angst and funny moments, and i really enjoyed reading it.

Detroit 07 by Rhinozilla is INCREDIBLE! It's a 38 part series (i know, im stilling working through it) and it's got so much angst, found family, comfort, crack shenanigans, and just as much plot as there is silly oneshots. It's got some OCs in it that are amazing and fit so well into the story, and it does deviate a little bit from the norm (different name for Nines for example, and no reed900) but it's still really good. Since there are so many parts to it and two of the parts are over 400k each, here are some of the smaller oneshots that can be read easily by themselves:

Color Wheel: Connor sustains minor damage to the hardware controlling his appearance. Everybody in the bullpen is united with one singular mission: do not let Connor know that his hair keeps changing colors.

The Breathing Graveyard: The DPD sends Connor to talk down a volatile deviant that's holed up in a trailer near the android scrapyard. It doesn't go the way any of them expect.

Bubbles: Connor gets stuck watching a lost little girl while they wait for her parents to come pick her up at the station.

And then i'd recommend Chapter 51 of Camaraderie if you're up for a wholesome father-son moment.

Through Your Veins by AceEmerson: Nines gets hurt and Gavin takes him back to his apartment to patch them up. There is also an android cat, first kiss, and TENSION

Secret by sv962: Role-reversal Reed900, first kiss. Tis very good. Semi-short at less than 5k and you want a good little role reversal, i recommend it.

The unexpected benefits of having a therapist terminator by texs_sins: Undeviated Nines decides to become Gavin's therapist to help improve their work partnership. 'Surely exposing himself to human emotions won't make a difference, after all nothing has ever made him deviate, right?' it's a fantastic fic and i love their take on Machine Nines and Deviated Nines. (fair warning because it's not listed in the tags, there's a little bit of smut in the last chapter, but easily skippable if you aren't up for it)

Beautifully Unique and Strange by cliffhanging: autistic Connor oneshot because we need more autistic Connor fics

Only Skin Deep by the AsexualofSpades: pre-relationship Reed900, where Nines tries to hide as much of his androidness in response to his anti-android partner five times and the one time he doesn't. It has a nice follow up fic too and i recommend it!

i think that's a fair amount to stop at, oh my god. And thanks again for your recs!! I'm gonna get reading to them tonight!! <3<3<3

Ahhh hell yes! Thank you so much!!

I have read the texs_sins fic (and most of theirs) but I'd definitely reread them bc I love them a lot so thank you for reminding me!

I am ALWAYS DOWN for more father son content with Hank and Connor, thank you SO much. It's so hard for me to find any these days.

Detroit 07... Almost sounds like a kind of Brooklyn 99 AU? In which case idk if I should read it just yet because I am also writing a dbh brooklyn 99 AU and I don't want to accidentally steal ideas or be influenced by someone else, but maybe after I post my own work I'll check it out! (two cakes!)

These all sound super fun thank you for the recommendations!! <333

[orangesunsets12]

15 questions, 15 mutuals

Thanks so much to @mentallyundone for the tag, I appreciate it! This was super fun!

Are you named after anyone? No, I don't think so, and I'm not sure if I'm happy about that or not. I love having a unique name in the family, but being named after someone is so cool!

When was the last time you cried? I think...yesterday? I don't cry too frequently, I usually get upset about things by panicking a lot and overthinking, but yesterday was a hard day

Do you have kids? Nope, I haven't even went on a date yet lol. I'm a single pringle, and I always have been! Though, it would be nice to have a boyfriend lol. All of my friends are dating and here I am being all alone lol. But it's not too bad...then I have more fanfic writing time! So, yeah, no kids.

Do you use sarcasm a lot? Occasionally, but not too often. I'm not a very sarcastic person.

What sports do you play/have you played? I don't really play sports, I only did gym in high school and nothing more. Though, I do enjoy basketball (I'm not very good at it) and I like curling, too.

What’s the first thing you notice about people? Probably their hair. I love seeing the different styles of hair people have, I'm not sure if it tells me much about them, but it's still something that I notice pretty much right away.

What’s your eye color? Blue. It isn't a vibrant blue, it's more dark, and it's not too noticeable.

Scary movies or happy endings? Probably happy endings, as much as I want to, I don't really watch horror movies, I've actually never watched one. But I still want to see some eventually. If anyone has any horror movie recommendations for newbies to the horror genre, please let me know! I don't want anything too scary to start lol. For the question, happy endings 100%, but I love a sad ending, too.

Any special talents? Not really...the only one I can think of is being able to drink super cold drinks faster than most people. Is that a talent, or just a sign that I need to stop drinking sugary, cold drinks and stuff?

Where were you born? I was born in my family home, not a hospital, which I learned early on is a bit strange. Apparently being born at home is rare?

What are your hobbies? I love writing, playing Minecraft Skyblock, and reading, but lately I haven't been reading much.

Do you have pets? Yup! I have three dogs, and they probably my best friends. They're all mixed breeds, so they look a bit goofy, but they're really cute.

How tall are you? I haven't measured myself in a while, but I think I'm 5 foot 9 or 5 foot 10.

Favorite subject in school? Either English or a media class that I took, in which I learned how to edit videos, make movies and stuff like that. It was really fun! As for English, I've always had incredible teachers, so they made it super fun! One of my teachers actually let me write a fanfic for a final assignment lol. But, I don't understand Shakespeare at all. That was the worst part of English class for me.

Dream job? I really, really want to be a full time author. I really want to write books for a living...it would be amazing. But, for now, I'll be working in retail

Thanks again for the tag, @mentallyundone, this was super fun! I may have overshared...but it was fun!

No pressure tags: @idiot-stevie @rockfact @ducky-died-inside @icedteaandoldlace @amethystandemma @angstydeaddragon @outlawcare @targetf0rce @blueskiesandstarrynights @strangerthingfanfic (I didn't know who else to tag , so anyone else who isn't tagged but wants to do this feel free to!)