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blondeboyfriend · 4 months ago

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𝐂𝐔𝐏𝐈𝐎 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐎𝐋𝐕𝐈 (𝟏𝟖+)

𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐃𝐍𝐈

[ PAIRING ] Zeke Yeager x f!reader [ AUTHOR'S NOTE ] Cupio dissolvi means "I wish to be dissolved" and it's typically used in a religious context, but I'm using it in the secular sense to express "such concepts as the rejection of existence and the masochistic desire for self-destruction." You can thank Wikipedia for that last bit. Enjoy the pwp. Don't fuck your psychiatrist. [ SYNOPSIS ] You reluctantly decide to tackle your personal issues and end up in the clutches of a psychiatrist with questionable methods. [ WORD COUNT ] 3.8k [ CONTENT ] Modern AU, dubcon, power imbalance, sadomasochism, dacryphilia, impact play/spanking, some very brief phone sex, size kink (Zeke is bigger than you, calls you little), praise, a little predator/prey but it's mostly in the mc's head, dumbification, facial.

“Welcome. I’m Dr. Zeke Yeager. It’s nice to meet you.”

You didn’t shake his extended hand as you crossed the threshold into his office. You practically sprinted to sit down in a plush chair. You gazed straight ahead, looking past the psychiatrist. He was rendered a formless smudge, a figure unworthy of focus, as he took a seat. The wall behind him was painted a faded pink, a pathetic attempt to subdue. It reminded you of an abandoned Barbie dreamhouse.

“Thanks for taking the time to see me,” you said, words glazed with malaise.

This was the last place you wanted to be, but the only person you could blame was yourself. A brief moment of supposed clarity overwhelmed your self-destructive nature, and you made an appointment to see a psychiatrist.

“What are you hoping to get out of these sessions?” he asked.

You allowed your eyes to focus and droned, “Uhhhhhhh. Well, Dr. Yea—”

“Call me Zeke. There’s no need to be formal.”

Zeke was younger than you expected. He looked more like a high school history teacher, the kind that lets kids hang out in his classroom after school. His wavy blond hair was in perfect disarray; it was clear he put a lot of effort into looking effortless. He wore a button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up. It fit perfectly, subtly showing off his muscled arms. He looked heavenly, like a bearded angel or Jesus himself.

Your heart was in your throat. You were always a sucker for blondes.

“I just want to feel… better?” you said cautiously, hoping you answered the question correctly.

“What does better mean to you?”

You exhaled sharply. “Less neurotic?”

“I see.”

You could tell he wasn’t satisfied with your answer. You decided to put forth a little effort.

“Less edgy? Maybe less…” You sighed. “I feel like I’m too aware of everything. It feels like everything is happening to me all at the same time. It’s overwhelming.”

“That sounds exhausting. Tell me about a time where you felt like that.”

His tone was warm though it lacked a certain sincerity. It was clear it was a practiced action. You hoped for an individualized approach, or maybe a psychiatrist that was better at acting. It was hard not to imagine yourself on an assembly line.

“Sometimes when I’m on the bus I’ll see people running to catch it, like just going as fast as they can. And then they miss it. Seeing that will ruin my day.”

“You must be a very empathetic person.”

You shook your head. “I just hate seeing someone try so hard and fail. It makes me uncomfortable. It’s so embarrassing for them.” You paused. “I guess what really bothers me is that I let something so stupid and insignificant affect me when it has nothing to do with me. I hate that I notice that stuff. I feel like I am noticing everything against my will.”

“You poor thing.”

“And sometimes I just want to explode. Like everything becomes too much and I want to burn it all down.”

He started writing stuff down in his notebook. You wanted to kick yourself for being so honest. It was almost like you were taking it seriously.

“But I’m still a good person, you know? I just think the world is constantly trying to terrorize me so I’m always alert? It’s hard to explain.”

He put down his notebook. “I never said you weren’t a good person. Do you have a boyfriend? A partner?”

He changed the subject with a smoothness you could only describe as magnificent. If any other man had pulled that on you, you would have walked out with zero hesitation. But Zeke transfixed you.

“No. I… I’m not really into all of that.”

“Not really into all of that? Interesting. Can I ask why?”

“It’s too much pressure. No one’s expectations ever line up.”

He chuckled. “People can be very opaque about what they’re seeking. Tinder’s the worst for it.”

It was hard to imagine him on any sort of dating app. He had the face of a guy that hunts his prey in the wild. You imagined him skulking around bars, watching his potential conquests drink themselves placid. It isn’t a traditional pursuit. He just watches and waits until they’re tired and slurring every sentence and struggling to use a rideshare app. That’s when he pounces.

“I’ve heard Tinder isn’t great,” you said, shaking off your weird fantasy.

“It’s only good for hookups.”

His frankness seemed unprofessional, but this was your first appointment with a psychiatrist so what the hell did you know. Maybe things were more casual, a little looser. Maybe discussing hookups was the norm. You fought off the urge to imagine what a night with him entailed, but it haunted you. Tangled sheets. His rough hands holding you down. Your knees pressing against your shoulders as he splits you in two.

You laughed nervously. “Yeah.”

“Sorry, let’s get back to business.” He adjusted his glasses, the frames gold and intricate. “It sounds like you may be experiencing hypervigilance.”

“Huh?”

“You’re always on the lookout for potential threats. You are essentially a prey animal.”

You were almost convinced he could read your mind. You never considered yourself prey, but it was clear that he did. Your toes curled. The discomfort was of an unusual flavor. Nauseating yet gratifying.

“How’s your sleep?

“Awful, I guess.”

“You guess,” he murmured. “Why is that?”

His questions felt endless, like the appointment was going to eat up the entirety of your life.

“I can’t shut my brain off.”

He sank down into his chair and spread his legs.

“How do you cope with that?”

“I really don’t… Unless weeping counts.”

“Do you feel… relieved when you cry?” he asked, staring intently at your lips.

“Kind of.”

“How often do you cry?”

He seemed too eager as he awaited your answer.

“I don’t keep track. Should I?”

“I doubt it would help,” he confessed. “What else do you do to relieve yourself?”

You glanced down at his crotch and noticed a bulge fighting against the thin fabric of his chinos. The air was sucked out of the room. His cock lured you in, demanding you to witness its growing glory.

“I don’t know,” you confessed. “Sorry.”

“I see. You seem a little combative,” he teased.

You weren’t being combative. You just couldn’t answer his questions thoughtfully on the spot. You weren’t prepared. You hadn’t planned on taking the appointment seriously. Time was needed to manifest something meaningful.

“You seem,”—you coughed nervously—“accusatory.”

He smirked. “Normally I’d refer someone like you to a therapist, but I can’t think of one equipped to deal with you.”

“I’m flattered.”

“Don’t be. After some consideration I’ve decided my counseling would be beneficial. I’m going to send you off with some homework.”

You assumed your days of homework were far behind you.

“Do you masturbate?”

“I do not feel comfortable answering that.”

“It’s a simple question. You either do or you don’t.”

“What does this have to do with anything?”

“Just trust me.”

“Give me a reason.”

“Fine. We talked about what you do to relieve yourself, right?” You went to answer but he cut you off. “I think masturbating will provide immense relief.”

“Well… I do already,” you huffed. “So I don’t think it’s helping much.”

He looked at you like you were the dumbest creature he had ever seen.

“You need to masturbate with intention.”

“What does that mean?”

“It’s hard to explain without me knowing what you’re doing wrong, which is why I need you to record yourself.”

A wet spot bloomed in your underwear.

“A voice recording is fine,” he acquiesced.

“Yeah, sure, okay. I’ll get right on that,” you said getting up.

You turned your back to him and quickly made your way to the door. The sound of his feet hitting the ground startled you as you went to turn the knob. Your brief moment of hesitation gave him enough time to grab you by the shoulder. The weight of his hand was disarming.

“I want to see you again next week, same time,” he said as he turned you around, your back against the door.

Your face was hot. “I’m not—”

“I promise I’m not taking advantage of you. My methods are proven to work,” he said, slipping his business card into your back pocket.

“So you pull this with all the girls?” you spat.

“The boys too.”

His conviction stirred up the whispers of ardor you tried to keep buried. His breath was clouded by a nauseating combination of espresso and tobacco, though the grime began to entice. You could feel the heat of his body against yours. You wanted to pull him closer so you could melt away into his warm embrace, but you couldn’t initiate something so brazen. You never had the guts for forwardness. And you liked to pretend you knew better.

“How progressive,” you finally choked out.

“I realize that this seems unorthodox and I don’t blame you for resisting.” He played with a piece of your hair. “If you value your mental health, you’ll trust me. Do I look like someone that would lead you astray?”

Kind of, you thought to yourself.

Your hesitation was palpable. He looked like he could practically taste it. He softened his gaze. It could have been a guilt trip, or just a half-assed attempt to assure you he had your best interests in mind.

“What if I don’t want to do it this way?”

“Then I might not be the right person to help you.”

You sighed. His methods did not seem trustworthy; they seemed like something ripped from a gross subreddit. HOT DOCTOR TRICKS DUMB BITCH PATIENT INTO PHONE SEX. You struggled to fully divorce the degradation from the situation. Being that dumb bitch patient was growing on you. It wove itself into your skin, becoming a part of you.

“Fine,” you replied. “But I’m not recording myself.”

“What if you call me?”

“In the middle of it?”

“Yes.”

“I…”

“C’mon. It’s not like I’m a predator. I’m your doctor.”

You wanted to trust him, but you thought about how easy it would be to use as leverage against you. A three hour deep dive video about revenge porn echoed through your mind. Opening yourself up to potential humiliation made you ill.

“I’ll call you. Maybe. I don’t know,” you mumbled.

He backed away. “Even if you don’t, try not to miss next week’s appointment. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about you."

You laughed, but failed to say anything. You slipped out the door and tried to convince yourself to give up working on yourself. Maybe you could get by living in a state of constant hypervigilance.

That night you crawled into bed, vibrator in hand. A life filled with hypervigilance sounded atrocious.

You stared up at the ceiling, your toy vibrating against your thigh on the lowest setting. It felt late, but you couldn’t check the time. You made a conscious effort to put your phone far away from your bed. You decided to humor Zeke, but you weren’t allowing yourself to call him in the midst of touching yourself.

You sighed and gripped your vibrator. You spread your legs and began to graze the inside of your labia with the tip. Normally you’d pull up Twitter and scroll mindlessly until a video of a hairy guy violently fucking a girl half his size popped up, but that wasn’t an option. You tried to imagine someone crawling between your legs, eyes dripping with lust as they work their fingers between your folds. You kept having to start over because your fantasy was plagued with your bearded fixation. The constant interruptions did little to entice you.

You pressed your vibrator against your clit. You fiddled with the settings until it was a series of long, hard pulses. You rutted up against it trying to unwind and give into pleasure. But you kept fighting off visions of Zeke rolling his tongue against your cunt. You wondered what his beard would feel like between your thighs. You wanted to know if he kept his glasses on because it seemed like leaving them on would be hotter.

You let out a dejected “fuck.”

You rolled over onto your side and stared at your phone. You wanted it to invoke disgust, disdain, but all it did was lure you out of bed. You rifled through your hamper to find your jeans. You fished his card out of your pocket. It had a goofy head shot of him and the number for his office which frustrated you to no end. You flipped it over and saw another number hastily scrawled on the back. You sighed in relief and called him.

“Yeah?” he croaked.

“Uh, sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“Oh. Hello.” His voice was still tinged with sleep, but much warmer. “You don’t need to apologize. I’m happy you called. How are things going?”

“They’re… not. I can’t get in the mood.”

“Hm. You didn’t mention struggling with that during your appointment.”

“I usually don’t,” you grumbled.

He laughed. “How are you struggling? Lead me through your process.”

You swallowed hard. “I, you know, try to… imagine something, but I keep thinking about things… I don’t, um, want to think about.”

“Like what? Violence? Your family? Animals?”

“What? No! A man! A human man.”

“Your father is a human man presumably.”

“I’m not thinking about my dad!”

“It’s more common than you think.”

You were starting to regret calling him. “It’s you. I can’t stop thinking about you.”

“Really?” The word dripped with amusement. “I can’t imagine why that’s a problem.”

“Well, it is.”

“Jeez, what did I ever do to you?” he snickered.

“I didn’t call you to get teased.”

He coughed nervously. “I’m sorry. I can’t help myself when I’m dealing with someone as precious as you, but that’s my problem. Not yours.”

“You think I’m cute?”

You weren’t surprised by this revelation, but wanted to draw out more praise.

“I do. You’re so adorable I can’t stand it.”

“You can’t stand it?”

“Uh huh,” he replied. “I hear that sweet voice of yours and all I can think about is fucking you so hard you cry. Would you like that?”

His words knocked the wind out of you. He said it so casually, like he was talking about the weather or what he ate for dinner.

“Or I could fuck you so hard you stop thinking. I’ll just have you be my adorable idiot I take care of.” He paused. “Come to think of it, that might help with the hypervigilance.”

He said it so thoughtfully it was almost kind of sweet. You were at a loss for words.

“Say something. Anything.”

“I would like that. Both. Uh. Both would be great.”

You smacked yourself in the forehead for being so unsexy.

“You sound nervous.”

“I am, but I think I like it.”

“Oh good,”—he sighed in relief—“because my cock is so hard right now and I’d feel like a pervert if you weren’t into this.”

“You’re still a pervert,” you said, putting your phone on speaker.

“Why don’t you tell this pervert what you’d want him to do to you?”

You flopped back down on your bed, resting your phone on your pillow, and patted around for your vibrator. You wracked your brain, desperate to think of something sufficiently sexy to say.

“I want,”—you hesitated—“I want you to ruin me. For other people. I want you to do something so disgusting to me that no one else will want to touch me.”

“Is that so?” he purred. “Tell me more, cutie pie.”

“I like it when it hurts.” You winced. You were never great at dirty talk, but Zeke seemed to enjoy it. You heard him let out a pleased groan. “A lot,” you added.

“Do you want me to hurt you, my little masochist?” he asked, voice catching in his throat.

“Yes,” you said as your fingers grazed your cunt.

You heard him try to stifle a moan before going silent.

“I have a feeling I’m going to regret asking this,” he finally said.

You held the vibrator against your clit. Each pulse permeated your body. “What?”

“Where do you live? We can worry about masturbating later. I need to fuck you.”

You sat up. “I don’t think that’s a great idea.”

“Sex brings people together. It’ll make it easier to open up to me.”

He was just finding ways to rationalize his desires. You never expected him to want you so desperately, especially if this was something he pulled often. That should have turned you off, but all it did was make you want him more. It was borderline idiotic to invite a strange man into your home. But there was no better feeling than the ecstasy of self destruction. You relished his red flags.

“Come on. I need to taste your pussy. I’m starving.”

“Alright. I’ll give you my address, but you have to send me a picture of your dick first.”

Zeke hung up immediately. A minute later he texted you a dick pick. You stared at the screen, bewitched by his cock. It was thick and long, almost beastly. The foreskin was pulled back revealing a pink tip, shiny with precum. You sent him your address without a second thought.

I live 10 mins away from you. How perfect, he replied.

Those ten minutes took their sweet time. You stood there, staring at the door. It was as if you were in a trance. You couldn’t wait for him to walk through your door and your heart sang when he finally knocked.

“Hi,” you said, eyes full of stars.

He smirked. “Hey, cutie pie.”

He wore a fitted t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants that failed to hide his semi-hard cock. A cigarette dangled from his lips.

“I’m assuming I can’t smoke inside.”

“I, uh, I guess it’s fine.”

He dropped his cigarette on the ground and carefully extinguished the cherry with his foot. He patted your head as he glided through the door. He didn’t seem nervous at all. His motions were relaxed, fluid, effortless. Twinges of jealousy pricked your skin. You still wanted him, still elated that he was standing in your home. But your brain started moving a thousand miles a second.

Was your place sufficiently clean? Did he bring condoms? Did you want him to wear one? Was he using you? Did he need you as bad as he was acting? Were you just a convenience? Did your room smell nice? Should you light a candle? What if you lit a candle and something caught fire while you’re fucking? Would you stop? What if you kept fucking and burned to death? Isn’t there something sexy about letting it all turn to ash? Could this be why orgasms are called little deaths? Did you remember to take your birth control? What if he has lung cancer and then breathes cancer into your mouth?

“Cancer’s not contagious,” you whispered to yourself.

“What was that?”

“Nothing!” you chirped, quickly stripping yourself naked before following after him.

You found him undressing in your room. You could barely contain yourself when he pulled his shirt over his head. His body was toned, but soft. He caught you staring and smiled awkwardly. It quelled the thoughts racing around your brain.

He got on your bed, resting on his knees. His eyes went to your vibrator.

“Aw, you really were trying,” he teased and patted the bed. “Come here. Ass up.”

You wasted no time getting into position and arched your back. He slipped his fingers into your cunt all the way up to his knuckles. He slowly pulled them out and let out a delighted hum.

He leaned over you, his beard tickling your ear. “Fucking incredible,” he murmured. “You’re going to be the one that gets me in trouble. I know it.”

He slid his cock into your cunt. You dug your fingers into the mattress as he pushed it further in. He took his time, making sure you felt every single inch of him filling you. Normally penetration didn’t do much for you. All it did was stress you out. You’d tense up and render yourself unfuckable. But Zeke was different.

He cared about you.

He had concerns regarding your mental health.

His dick was huge.

He didn’t show you any mercy. Each thrust drove his cock against your cervix. Waves of pain washed over you, the anguish further obscuring your issues. The relief was a welcomed affliction. You dug your fingers deeper into the mattress and gritted your teeth.

“You said you like it when it hurts, right?”

“Ye—yeah,” you stuttered as he continued to plunge his cock in your cunt.

He slapped your ass. The pain shot through you and you moaned. Just as soon as the sting subsided, he slapped you again. It made your heart swell. You felt like it was creeping up your throat. Tears welled up in your eyes as your ecstatic moans swelled.

He grabbed a fistful of your hair, forcing you to crane your neck back.

“I knew you’d be a pretty crier.”

His praise made you ecstatic. “Make me cry more.”

He pushed your head down into the mattress and fucked you harder. You went limp. All you could do was whimper and let your orgasm overtake you. Your entire body was throbbing, singing with agony and exaltation. When he pulled out, his cock was slick with your fluids.

“Roll over.”

“Huh?”

He laughed and flipped you over with ease. You stared up at him in a daze. The world was still spinning around you. He started to stroke himself, his breathing labored and depraved.

“Close your eyes and open your mouth,” he choked out.

You shut your eyes and stuck out your tongue, eager to drink in every drop of his cum. His desperate groans made your clit throb. You were burning up, the anticipation coursing through your veins.

“Fuck!” he rasped as cum splattered on your face.

You opened your eyes as he rubbed the tip of his cock on your tongue. You felt so small in his shadow, his body looming over yours. He stared down at you, his expression a little cold, a little clinical.

“So how do you feel?” he asked, his voice hoarse.

“I… Fine, I guess.”

“You guess?”

“I don’t know. Good. I just—I can’t really talk right now.”

You were inarticulate in the shadow of your orgasm. Your brain existed elsewhere.

He frowned. “Alright. I have a lot of questions for you in the morning. I know you haven’t been in treatment long but I think we’re close to a breakthrough.”

#zeke yeager x reader #zeke jaeger x reader #aot x reader #zeke yeager smut #zeke jaeger smut #attack on titan smut #.fics #.aot #.zeke #x reader #reader insert #dividers by cafekitsune

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mncxbe · 11 months ago

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bsd men and what they do for christmas

𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊, 𝑪𝒉𝒖𝒖𝒚𝒂, 𝑭𝒖𝒌𝒖𝒄𝒉𝒊, 𝑺𝒊𝒈𝒎𝒂 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: sfw/nsfw/ severe brainrot♡

𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊 𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅

can I just start by saying that this man has never celebrated Christmas properly so he's so excited to spend time with you

Dazai prefers to keep things simple: homemade dinner and then watching a movie

you're supposed to open the presents in the morning but he isn't patient enough. the moment he sees them under the tree you so kindly decorated a few days ago he has the biggest smile on his face

"come on bella you don't seriously want to wait until morning. how could you do this to me? you know how curious I am"

you end up opening the gifts that night. he's gonna loves whatever you get him really but his heart literally melts if you knit him a scarf or write him a letter. dazai's a sucker for self-made gifts

the only appropriate way to show his gratitude is to bend you over and fuck you nice and slow, your face mushed in the cushy pillows on your shared bed as he takes you from behind

"there you go pretty girl. my, my I'm starting to think this pretty pussy of yours is my favourite gift so far"

you can bet he wears a santa hat

𝑪𝒉𝒖𝒖𝒚𝒂 𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅

he'd take you out to the most expensive restaurant in town for a proper meal

after that, if you find a rink that's open on Christmas eve he takes you ice skating (totally not an excuse for him to hold your hand)

once you get home you cuddle on the couch while watching a generic movie like Home Alone. it's always the classics I'm telling you

he has a fireplace!!! and insists on opening the gifts next to it

among other stuff, he gets you Christmas themed lingerie and makes you wear it in bed. cuz after all, you're the best gift he could ask for

forget about baking him sweets, the only dessert he wants is your pretty cunt. he's gonna eat you out for what seems like hours, making you cum on his tongue at least two or three times before he even thinks about fucking you

"shiit baby you look so pretty like this. you like it when I spoil you rotten don't ya? I bet you do- oh fuck yea cum f'me doll"

𝑭𝒖𝒌𝒖𝒄𝒉𝒊 𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅

hubby's busy even on holidays

he probably has to attend some obnoxious event and ofc you go as his plus one

he's gonna spend all evening sulking and complaining about how idiotic the whole party is

by the time you two get home he's too exhaused to do anything but you may be able to bribe him to stay awake for an hour or two with some gingerbread

can I just say he'd probably get you the nicest gifts? i'm 100% sure he has a good salary so he can afford whatever you want. expensive jewelery or skincare? sure, no problem. a stack of books with those pretty decorative covers? fine again

he probably gets a bit tipsy on mulled wine so be prepared to hear a silly yet lengthy love confession before bed

falls asleep before midnight but he's gonna make up for it in the morning if you catch my drift

𝑺𝒊𝒈𝒎𝒂 𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅

sweet baby's so anxious at first

he's never celebrated christmas before so he doesn't really know what to do. this whole idea is so new to him but he can't deny he loves spending time with you decorating the house

Sigma wants to try any tradition you may have; baking winter themed cookies, making crackers, watching a movie marathon

when it comes to gifts he doesn't really know what to get you so he ends up buying multiple things he thinks you'd like and he's so happy when you tell him you like them

cuddles cuddles cuddles all evening under a cushy blanket with a mug of hot chocolate in your hands

he'd look so cute wearing one of those reindeer headbands

if it's snowing, take him slow dancing in the snow or on a walk around town. he's gonna love the pretty christmas lights

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd x reader #bsd fluff #bsd smut #dazai bsd #bsd dazai #dazai x reader #dazai fluff #dazai smut #chuya smut #bsd chuya #chuya x reader #sigma fluff #sigma bsd #sigma x reader #bsd fukuchi #fukuchi bsd

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heartfullofleeches · 1 year ago

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I saw a video of a vampire bat drinking cow's blood and now all I'm thinking about is Carnis and Vampire/Bat Hybrid Darling- Darling has an unlimited and willing blood bag and all they have to do is take good care of them and reward them with treats every now and then. The price of junk food and candy is nothing compared to what they used to have to pay for warm blood before finding this poor sweetie in the streets. Carnis reveals their regenerative abilities the first chance they get to prove their worth to darling. Darling can sell their parts or put them throw any hardship if it means they have a home. Darling probably wouldn't want to hurt the poor cow more than needed and honestly feels a little bad for them.

Maybe Darling works at a shady blood bank and meets Carnis that way. A receptionist who turns a blind eye to what really goes around the office so long as they get their weekly payment of blood and cash. They develop a bit of a soft spot for the hybrid who stumbles into the building every now and again. Their clothes are awfully dirty and there's no telling if they even knew what a hairbrush was, but they always light up whenever they talk to Darling. It's probably because of the suckers Reader hands out with every visit, but the company is nice in this environment. They ask Darling what their favorite snacks are and brings as many as their arms can carry whenever they return. Unlike most clinics, the one reader works at has no limit for patients to donate and so they see Carnis quite often. They really shouldn't pry, but curiosity gets the better of them.

"Hey, this is like... the fifth time you've come in this week and it's only Tuesday. What would you possibly be wasting all that money on? - how you're even standing straight is a better question."

"candy... the nice man said...said I could have anything in his store if I bring some."

"Have you seriously been buying nothing but candy all these months?."

"No...no... gifts for you... remember? To show you I'm...I'm interested."

"Interested?"

"What he said... You're... nice.. gave me candy.. I like nice things. I like candy. I like you."

"....Ok, I get off in twenty minutes. We'll get you some real food and then I'll drop you off at home. It's not fair if we both have to starve."

"Home?"

"Yea. You have one don't you?"

The cow silently shakes their head. "Never..."

"Well since I'm pretty sure it's your blood that's been keeping me fed I guess the least I can do is lend you my couch for a couple nights. Sounds good?"

"Stay...with you? Sounds good... Happy... Thank you... Promise I won't make trouble."

#Carnis my oc #yandere oc #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere imagines #yandere x you #yandere headcanons #yandere blurb #soft yandere #yandere scenarios #yandere hybrid #yandere drabble

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taylormarieee · 8 months ago

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Stalker Thomas Webb

Summary: Your the new girl and you've just moved into this apartment in New York to get away from your parents and it seems you have a cute stalker...

Word Count: 1.5k

Pairings: Thomas Webb x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Thomas being a stalker, confrontation, suggestive throughout the entire fic, reader being a tease, Thomas being a needy boy, Thomas playing dumb/ hard to get, Mimi being jealous, almost smut...tehehe maybe part 2?

You were so happy to finally be free of the toxic relationships in your life. Your mom, your dad, and even your ex boyfriend. You were free, finally free.

You loved reading and writing and you felt as though you could achieve your passion, your goal to be a writer here in New York. Your mom never accepted it, a small town girl could never possibly make it big.

But you wanted to prove her wrong. You wanted your name in the paper and to be in interviews and to finally show them at you did mean something, that you had talent, that you actually had what it takes to be successful.

Yea, you were a small town girl but you were going to show them that small town girls can make it big! You finally got an apartment. Your apartment number was 2c. You were so happy.

You even made a friend. His name was Thomas. He lived in the Apartment two doors down from you. He was like you.

College dropouts, suckers for writing, lovers for books, you guys were destined to be friends.

But Thomas wanted something more. Even if he did just meet you 2 days ago, he wanted to feel every inch of your body on his body. He wanted you so close that your souls were touching.

He craved you, needed you. So whenever you went out, he went out as well. Constantly stalking and seeing what you were up too. But what Thomas didn't notice was that he wasn't exactly being sneaky or discreet about his stalking.

You constantly saw him and at first you just thought you guys were in the same place coincidently but then you started noticing him everywhere. Places he usually wouldn't be.

You found it quite cute because you wanted to be more than just friends with Thomas too! Yea, you guys have known each other for like 2 weeks now but he was incredibly attractive and you just wanted to suck the life out of him.

Prune him of every last drop of cum he has in his body. Make his dick twitch with overstimulation and anticipation. You wanted it badly but when was the right time?

Eventually when his stalking decided to get more frequent, you decided to confront him. You hid behind a wall waiting for him to turn the corner. When he did you jumped out with a "Boo!" and he stumbled back.

You began to laugh and his face got red. "Hey Thomas... why you stalking me, hmm?" you asked in the sweetest voice.

He's blushing heavily now, 'dammit you knew, he's screwed'.

"W-What do you mean y/n? I wasn't f-following you." He falters and you find it kinda cute. You smile at him and get closer to him. "Oh really? You've been following me for 2 and a half weeks now baby... why deny it? I'm not mad...I find it adorable actually."

He gulps and you can physically hear his heart beating. You get closer to him and your eyes rake up and down his body. A smirk creeps it's way onto his face as he questions, "Your not mad?" He asks.

You shake your head 'no' and he smiles even wider. "that's good. Was planning on doing it a lil longer." He says.

"Why stalk me when were neighbors. If you wanna fuck me just ask." You respond. His eyes grow wide at your statement. 'You caught him' he thought.

That's exactly what he wanted. For some reason he couldn't verbalize it with you. He wanted to make sure you weren't seeing anyone and now that his fear has been denied, he can have you all to himeself.

"What makes you think I wanna fuck you? Hmm?" He asks with a smirk on his face and it only grows wider when yours falters. You look around and shuffle nervously but then as you opened your mouth to say something, some girl turned the corner.

"Thomas, what's going on here?" She asks. She's short but maye the same height as you. Short black hair and melanin skin that glowed in the sunlight.

"Oh hey Mimi." He says breaking his eye contact away from you to face her. 'So this was mimi... the girl that couldn't get her fucking feelings straight,' you thought. She was pretty but Thomas deserved better in your opinion.

"Who are you? and Thomas what the hell!? You were supposed to meet me today at the cafe. I saw you walk by but you didn't come in so I decided to follow you." she says looking between you and Thomas.

"This is my new friend," he says introducing you by your name. "I'm hanging out with her. I totally forgot about the cafe today, my bad." He says.

You scoot a little closer to Thomas to let a woman pass by she mutters out an 'Excuse me' and you smile and gladly move out her way. You grab Thomas' hand to make sure that the lady didn't have to say it again.

Mimi's line of eyesight drops down and you notice your still holding Thomas's hand. You let go of his hand and smile at him. "Me and Nick broke up. Wanted to tell you that today..." She says looking everywhere but Me and Thomas.

"Did you?" He says looking dead at her. She looks up and makes eye contact with him. "Your supposed to be more excited than that. I broke up with him because I got into Croatia and I want you to come with me!" she says as we stand there.

You can tell she's fuming. It's like right out of a forbidden love story except there usually standing in the rain. Shes mad at you. feels as if you are taking Thomas away from her when he was her's first.

But she can't be mad when she blew it, she is the cause to this whole situation. Thomas wanted her. Badly, and she blew it.

"I have a confession to make." Thomas says. You are looking at Mimi but realize he's not looking at her. He's looking at you.

"I love you. I've loved you since the first time I saw you walk into your apartment. Since the first time we made eye contact I knew. I knew I needed to be with you. So I followed you. Everywhere. More than 2 and a half weeks. I followed you to find out what you liked and what your routine was." He confesses. Your heart swells and you smile.

"I know I seem weird and out of place and I probably sound like a complete creep but, I really do love you. I'm so in love with you that it hurts." He finishes his confession with a sigh and your smile only gets wider.

"I love you too Thomas. I've loved you since I first saw you grabing your mail and talking to that nice old man in 2b. I'm in love with you too Thomas Webb. So much I might cry cuz I felt like I couldn't have you because of her." You say motioning to mimi.

Mimi drops her head as she realizes she's too late. She confessed to Thomas and he found someone else. He really was a good man, guess it was just the right person at the wrong time.

You hug Thomas not wanting to kiss him in front of Mimi to make her feel bad. She says goodbye to Thomas before getting a cab.

He feels bad now but if she’s leaving she most likely won’t come back. He grabs your hand and you both start running towards your apartment as it did start to rain.

When you both got inside the apartment complex, you both laughed as you were both drenched due to the rain.

"I need you... god I've waited so long." Thomas confesses. Your eyes twinkle and you smile.

But you realize that this is all happening a little to fast. As much as you wanted to give into the throbbing between your legs, you needed a tiny bit of time to think.

Before you could answer he kisses you and pushes you against the door. Your hands find purchase on his chest. his muscles and abs being see through because of his wet shirt.

You kiss him back eagerly as you taste cherry on his lips. You break the kiss and suck on that sweet spot on his neck and jaw. Marking him as yours.

He moans in your ear as he lifts you up to straddle his waist. You lock lips with him again before realizing what you were going to say to him.

"T-Thomas baby, wait... wait a second." You say out of breath. He hums and looks at you. "W-What? what's wrong?"

"This is going a little too fast hmm? Lemme just think about this cause mimi is still plaguing my mind and I feel bad. I want you so badly but let's freshen up and come over later tonight yea... to finish what we started ok?" You say with a little smirk on your face.

You kiss him one more time before adjusting his glasses and kissing his nose. He smiles and slaps your ass before he makes his way to the door.

"Your lucky I love you... I'll wait just a little longer for you." He says before smiling and closing the door. You giggle to yourself and make your way to your bedroom.

Oh how you longed to see him again... feel him just one more time...

Taglist: @emmaafinchh @dustbunniess @willyoubemycherryy

#thomas webb #callum turner fanfiction #callum turner #callum turner imagine #thomas webb x reader #the only living boy in new york

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mychlapci · 2 months ago

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I think it’d be really funny if in cybertron, amicas and sparkmates were forced to be in far closer proximity. Like the amica is bonded to a bot who had their own sparkmate. Great. Now get the bot bonded to both of them pregnant. Now, in society and the culture, both the conjunx and amica should be contributing transfluid to the creation of the sparkling. Usually the conjunx winds up contributing more, but it’s extremely normal and acceptable for the sparkling to look more like the amica than anyone else. They clearly love their amica so much, is not that nice?

And maybe it’s a physical need, too. If you do the sparklings form at first from a spark merge between mechs, then yea, maybe they need to be repeatedly exposed to the others bound to their carrier, like a conjunx and an amica. It keeps the carrier relaxed and feeling safe and protected, and it aids the sparkling

Ok now the funny bit. Imagine tf prime (or whatever you want but i think prime works the best for this). Imagine Optimus being amica bonded with Ratchet. And then Optimus becoming Conjunx with Megatron. And then Optimus gets sparked.

All this to say, Optimus getting tag teamed by Ratchet and Megatron, who are arguing with each other and each trying to one up the other with the overloads they can give optimus, with how much transfluid they can give him, how many times they can shove their sparks against Optimus’. And he’s just between them, completely blissed out of his fucking mind, unable to even really process what they’re arguing about this time

(When the sparkling is born, it has quite a bit of white, not silver, white, and ratchet refuses to let anyone say it came from Op, he even insists the blue eyes came from him alone. he fucked his amica so good his coding overwrote megatron’s. He never lets meg live it down, and meg reaaallllyyy considers locking optimus away when he inevitably gets sparked again to keep ratchet away)

-robooby

ahhshsjsw to be honest, I have absolutely considered something similar. i'm just a sucker for my own headcanon that the "regular" cybertronian relationship is made out of three bots, and that makes perfect sense when you take into account the institute of the amica and the conjux endura. and also the fanon trine.

tfp is the funniest continuity for Optimus to rope Megatron and Ratchet into the same relationship. Optimus spends most of his days pinned between a bickering Megatron and Ratchet, the two of them trying to get as much of their transfluid into their precious Prime as they can, preferably always more than the other. I think they both have quite the competition. And neither of them plays it fair. Optimus is regularly snatched away by either his amica or conjux during the day for a quick creampie in the closet, up to the point where they're evening out during the quickies. Optimus enjoys it very much. He gets his valve fucked and stuffed multiple times a day by the mechs that matter to him most? Yes please.

Megatron would get too smug for his own good once they learn that the bitlet is pretty huge, thinking he won the coding race, only for the bitty to come out in white with streaks of white and blue... Ratchet is so smug proud. Of course, a medic's coding is the strongest.

I also think it would be funny (and also kinda fucked up) if this was pre-war and this was the schism that made Megatron lose it.

#valveplug #pregnancy mention #texty

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poomphuripan · 11 months ago

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10 BL Boys I Want Carnally To Love, Take Care and Cuddle With Every Night

@bunnakit awww thank you for the tag 🫶 as an asexual i can't say i spent much time thinking about fucking anyone (so coming up with this list was really hard ;_;) but if any of these characters propositioned... i would NOT say no 😉

10. Phob (Something In My Room)

if there is an award for cutest ghost of all time in a BL series, i think Phob will take home easily. Phob deserves better sex. my meow meow friendly ghost Phob, i will tuck you in bed my ghost sweetie 🥺🫶

9. Shao Fei (History 3: Trapped)

my righteous cop with a strong sense of justice, i really love Shao Fei so much. Shao Fei doesn't beat around the bush and is really straightforward with his wants, I LOVE HE!

8. Khuafah (Sky In Your Heart)

Khuafah, the HOT CHARMING doctor that you are. i would volunteer to get sick every day just to visit him 🫠

7. Gene (Lovely Writer)

if Gene ever needs to write a straight romance novel, i'm happy to make out with him for research purposes 😉

6. Pisaeng (Be My Favorite)

most patient boyfriend who tries super hard to get you plushies? yea i would bang Pisaeng in a heartbeat, no doubt. in fact, i believe Pisaeng would be considerate and wait for me to be ready (Pisaeng babe i'm always ready for you 😉)

5. Tennoji Haru (Trillion Game)

while Trillion Game is DEFINITELY not BL, but Meguro Ren was in Kieta Hatsukoi so my boy should get a PASS 😤 Haru is confident yet humble, self-proclaimed selfish yet always selfless. god i love competent men *swoons* Trillion Game is out on Netflix, please check out my boy Haru and his boy(friend) Gaku and their start-up adventure together 🥺👉👈.

4. Charn (Laws of Attraction)

while i can't guarantee that i can give Charn a good time, i believe that as a fellow lawyer i can assist Charn with any case work he got. Like i said, i am a sucker for competent men 😮‍💨.

3. Tangmo (Great Men Academy)

you don't understand how obsessed i am with the og golden retriever, nation's boyfriend, Tangmo. it's been 4? years... i have not let him go... gentle soft boi but great at judo too? i think Tangmo and i should have our wrestling sessions ending up as makeout sessions.

2. Joe (My Stand In)

this is kind of a cheat but i've read the original novel for My Stand In (Professional Body Double by Shui Qian Cheng) and i can confirm Joe/Zhou Xiang is the sweetest soul, most precious, unluckiest gay ever (Ming, you are on sight, watch it sir or imma steal Joe away). i'm super excited for My Stand In because i hope i get to fall in love with Joe once again the way i fell super hard, head over heels for him when i finished this danmei novel within less than 24 hours. (was this shameless PR for Poom Phuripan's new BL series next year? yes, yes it absolutely was 🤗)

1. Khun Yai and Jom (I Feel You Linger In The Air)

if i don't have a gentle lover like Khun Yai Kritsada Palathip or a soft boyfriend like Jom Ravit Pittayanan then what's the POINT. i want both of them so BAD. also isn't it such a crime that Yai lives his entire life the rest of his live in celibacy, having fucked only ONE person (the love of his life) in his lifetime. LET ME IN. i will love both of you equally.

+ bonus: Chef Guy (Bake Me Please)

did you REALLY think i was gonna end my list without current loml, our resident sad boi, considerate and caring Chef Guy? 😅 Guy deserves a spot on here because well i'm absolutely feral for this man. Guy is just the nicest guy and i will literally do anything for him. Guy had me at hello but my heart truly broke when he comforted Peach saying he doesn't want to see Peach who's given him so much positivity, cry 😭.

oooooh that was soooo hard ;_; i love all these characters, maybe one day i need to start listing the female characters i'd totally hypothetically bang too because WOMEN ARE HOT 🔥.

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witch128chick · 7 months ago

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i watched the toh pilot episode, here's my reaction

ooookay i so wasn't expecting what i just watched- I WANT MORE

(if you haven't watched it yet but want to do it without spoilers then don't open this)

alright alright i lost my shit actually

Amity stood up for Luz and the fact that she said this was the first time anyone had done that for her is just so sad...

and Luz gave her a drawing as a 'thank you' ( ꒦ິ ཀ ꒦ິ ) she's so sweet

oh and also!!!! first bigger change is that Amity was an exchange student in the human realm! i wonder why her parents sent her there and if there's any angsty reason for that (cuz yk yeah i'm a sucker for angst esp if it's Amity related)

my first thought when i saw this frame: "if i could picture how my mind looks like this would be it"

girly just casually grabbed a key and travelled between realms- do most witches and demons have a portal key or is it exclusive??

Luz met Eda!!! also they teleported later- so cool (ง ◉ _ ◉)ง

i heard that the Owl House was meant to be a shop first and now we can see how it would've looked like!

awww Luz is so excited!!! i love her (˶˃⤙˂˶)

that ceiling looks so prettyyy

Luz i have to say it again and i will never stop saying it: i love you you're amazing pls never change

another bigger change!! Lilith is headmistress in the high school!!! and everyone's afraid of her- shes's a boss bitch and ik she's evil but i love her

girllll--- (ง ͠ಥ_ಥ)ง why are you like this???? you had no business being this mean-

she threw away Luz's drawing from earlier whyyyy (·•᷄∩•᷅ )

side note: the demon on the left is Boscha's pilot?? yk 3 eyes and everything...

i loved this scene! Lilith is so cool and everything! and i absolutely love the sibling mocking between them it's priceless-

and said mockery pissed Lilith off sm that she turned into a beast ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽ does she have the curse in this version? is it really a curse or can Lilith turn into that thing whenever she wants to??

soooooooo omg- i can't Lilith got trapped... somewhere!!!! and her hand is chopped off now

i am soo curious about this like what happens to her after this??? where does she go? how does she get back? will she seek revenge??

oh uhm all i wanted to say regarding this frame is that guys- yes. relatable

Luz is literally this emoji 🧍🏼‍♀️just in a lying position

noooooo this was sooo sweet!!! (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)♡

i love how it was Eda who screamed bc the drawing that Amity threw out the window hit her in the head-

Eda complimented Luz's drawing and omg it touched her sm (っ˃̣̣̥ -˂̣̣̥ς) she only felt accepted and understood by Eda i'm so sad rn

and the biggest plot twist happened

i am not okay

EDA'S WORKING FOR THE EC??????? since when? how? why???

i'm guessing Lilith is also working for the Emperor but like Edaaaaaaaaaaa

i can't get over this

i saw someone say smth about a betrayal and this scene but i wasn't expecting THIS

tho i'm pretty sure Eda wouldn't hand Luz over (but i do have some alternative ideas for how this could play out)

is Eda cursed here too? how would she get another key to send Luz back to the human realm? what happened to Lilith??? where's Camila? we saw Amity starting to change her mind about Luz but how different her arc would've been here from canon???

i am so fixated on this rn this will occupy my brain for a good few weeks i think

and i absolutely hate myself for wanting to write a fanfic for this- I HAVE TOO MANY PROJECTS AND IDEAS ALREADY!!

but guys pls if you see anyone writing a fic for this lmk!!!

so yea i'm crazy rn i loved this and will definitely watch it again

the lore, the questions...

#owl house #the owl house luz #eda the owl lady #toh pilot #the owl house pilot #king owl house #owl house lilith

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cepheusgalaxy · 4 months ago

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And it's done! Props to @letitbehurt for the yummy prompt. I'm an absolute sucker for stoic whumpees, so I chose her prompt to write first!

CWs: Exhaustion whump, bad decisions

Whumpee didn’t feel very good.

She wavered it off, though, shooking their head and massaging their temples for a second. Whatever it was, she didn’t have time for it right now.

Their plan couldn’t just wait for another day. Their team was waiting.

Whumpee took a deep breath, and then another, and composed themselves together, as they should.

They finished getting dressed, a black cardigan and the leather boots they’ve been given, and dragged themselves to the living room.

The capitain didn’t notice them arriving. She seemed to be looking over a map, and when Whumpee got closer, they may have saw her biting her lip, but she wasn’t sure.

Whumpee saw the team members arriving and she straightened her spine and got in a proper position. That made the room spin a bit more than it should.

— Is everybody here? — Capitain said. — I’ve talked to our mole, and they said today is the day we can infiltrate. We will rehearse the plan one more time and... — She looked at her. — Whumpee? Are you hearing me?

Whumpee had lost balance for a second, and she was quick to get herself together and stand straight.

— Yes, ma’am.

Capitain didn’t send her another look, and started repassing the plan. Whumpee resisted the urge to close their eyes. Why was everything so bright today? Her head was pounding for some reason, and she desperately longed for them to get over the plan and make silence.

They tried to stay focused on Capitain’s words and on the map, but the roadlines where getting mashed together and it was being hard to focus. Well, no problem, she thought, a little frustrated. Whumpee had already decorated the map and the plan, and prepared themselves to every variable. They had spent nights in clear rehearsing everything and thinking of solutions to everything that could go wrong. That’s why they were sent here, after all.

Capitain finished talking and let her team give another look at the blueprints and roadways they would take, and she fought the urge to rehearse the plan just once more. They unfortunately didn’t have time for it. Yea, time, it was a precious thing. They had to get in, and then out. She bit her lip and ran her hand through her hair.

She turned to Whumpee. Yes, that’s right, she thought. Whumpee had been working with them for a few months now, and they were brilliant. She was an agent from another organization, a recently-made ally, and were sent to help them. Whumpee was strong, disciplined, smart, efficient, and now, a fundamental part of all their plans.

She was always stable and composed and... Capitain squinted her eyes. They didn’t seem to be very focused today. But that should be okay, right?

— Liberated, everybody. — She clapped her hands to get everyone’s attention. All heads turned back to her — Remember your roles and finish the preparatives. We go at dawn. — As both anxious and excited confirmations started leaving the room along with the members and Whumpee moved herself to leave as well, Capitain rose her hand. — Not you, Whumpee. I want to talk. Are you ready for tonight already?

Capitain’s eyes got a glimpse of a flinch, but she wavered it off. Whumpee wasn’t one to flinch.

— Miss? — They answered in a slightly lower voice than they usually would.

Capitain didn’t know exactly how to get the information that she wanted. She hadn’t worked with Whumpee for much time, and still hadn’t had the chance to know her, besides her brilliant usefulness, but maybe...

— Are you sure you are in condition to make this work?

— Yes, Capitain. I am. — She answered without hesitation.

Capitain crossed her arms and looked straight in her eyes. Capitain was tall and had to look down on most people, but never on Whumpee. She could easily be on the same level as them.

— You seem off. You might want to rest for a bit and eat well before...

Capitain interrupted herself when Whumpee lost balance and fell foward. Capitain rushed to catch them, shock rising inside her.

— Whumpee? Whumpee, what happened?

— I’m...It’s alright, I’m... — They said as they supported themselves on her arms to get themselves back up. They brushed their eyes. Now that she was that close, Capitain saw that she looked way more than off. She looked... exhausted.

Capitain swallowed up. Was she being affected that much? Maybe she had noticed Whumpee was skipping some nights to work, but... She didn’t think Whumpee would go that far. Shit. Capitain didn’t want to leave Whumpee here, she was a fundamental part of the operation, but if she went as she was...

They would be set up to fail.

Damn it.

— Whumpee, have you slept? Are you sick?

— I’m not sick — Whumpee defended herself.

— Have you slept?

Whumpee avoided answering, and as she turned her head away, Capitain took a decision.

This wasn’t their only chance, she reassured herself. If they went now, things would probably end up terrible. Capitain had been working on this field for almost a decade now, and she knew how to evaluate risks.

Even when she didn’t want to.

— The operation — she sighed, and walked up to a table and began scribbling a note in a letter — will be delayed.

Whumpee didn’t seem to have heard her at first, but then her expression changed, and she said:

— What? Ma’am, why? If it’s me, please know I’m alright! — They pointed to themselves — I can still play my role-

Capitain interrupted them with an abrupt hand motion.

— No. You can barely stand still. It’s not something I had taken into account... — she dreaded — But it’s not worth the risk. We can retreat and alter the plan and readjust things with our allies... — Oh that would be a pain. This operation had taken a month to get ready. If only she hadn’t relied on Whumpee that much...

They still protested a bit, but Capitain was firm and ordered them to fix their sleep schedule. Whumpee, with no choice, quit and obeyed.

Capitain sighed in frustration, and started calling her team and sending messages.

The sun had just started to set, and Whumpee already was in position.

She knew the plan by hand at this point, and she knew exactly which parts she could do alone, and which parts there would be no chance of doing later, not with great sacrifice.

She tsked internally. If Capitain didn’t want the plan to occur today just because she was feeling a little tired, fine, but they wouldn’t let it all go down the hill because of a mistake of her part.

It was her job after all.

So they wavered it off and massaged her temples, trying to take the pain of the bright world and loud everything around them.

She didn’t have the time for that right now.

#my writing #whump writing #exhaustion whump #whump drabble #stoic whumpee #team whump #living weapon whumpee #perhaps?#whumpee uses she/they and capitain uses she/her #i like this one

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weak4skz · 1 year ago

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Hope is For Suckers

Han Jisung x Reader

Genre: friends to lovers, fluff, angst, idol au

Summary: Han and y/n have been friends since before they remember. But what happens if their friendship is severed by an unfortunate situation and Han goes off to be an idol while y/n is in college. When they connect through a mutual friend, what happens then?

Word Count: 1.3k (sorry it's short I'm just trying to get this chapter out)

CHAPTER WARNINGS: eating disorder, negative self talk/thoughts, body dysorphia, a lot of feelings, panic attack

NOT PROOF READ!!!

THIS IS NOT AN ACCURATE REPRESTATION OF THE PEOPLE MENTIONED IN THE FIC

A/N: Sorry for the really late update. I've been really busy and haven't been really motivated to write. I might but HIFS on hiatus until July but idk yet. Thank you for all the support though, I really appreciate it

want2besomeoneelse lixie-jisung-stan jisuperboard mentoslol i-dont-know-me-either mooncallerautumn poisonivy21

this is my current taglist. if your name is in read it means I can't tag you. also please comment if you would like to be added

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When we pull into Chan’s designated parking spot I’m so nervous I could puke.

“Hey,” Chan says, gently putting a hand on my knee to stop its bouncing. “They’ll all love you just as much as I do. But if you still want to go home I’ll drive you ‘kay?”

“No, I want to meet them.” I force out of my mouth. He just nods and we both get out of the car and begin to walk towards the door. When he opens it, the first thing I notice is the smell of freshly baked brownies. Then, I hear yelling and laughing coming from the living room.

“YOU landed on MY property. PAY ME THE DANG FINE.”

Then I fear another voice scream

“YOU’RE IN JAIL! I’M NOT GIVING MONEY TO A CRIMINAL.”

“THAT’S NOT HOW YOU PLAY!!!” the first screams.

All of this over a game of monopoly?

“Boys” I mutter with a playful roll of my eyes. “I know right” Chan responds with a small smile.

Chan leads me to the living room. “Hey guys” he greets the six men casually.

“Hey Chan hyung.” one with mid length dark hair and glasses responds. “Who’s that?” he asks, pointing to me.

“This is Y/n. She’s a good friend of mine and older than half of you so show some manners and introduce yourselves.”

“I’m Jeongin” glasses says.

“Seungmin”

“I’m Felix”

“I’m sexy king Hyunjin”

“Man shut up.” the shortest says with a small laugh, “I’m Changbin”

“I’m Minho”

Then they go around again and tell me their ages. But I thought Chan told me they’re were eight members in his group? As I finish my thought, someone bursts in through the door.

“‘Sorry I’m late guys. Oh hi… what’s your name? I’m…”

“Han?”

There is a pause, a moment of silence, and for a second I regret saying anything.

“Uh yea, I’m Han Jisung. How did you know my name?”

“Chan talks about you gusy all the time. I just assumed it was you because you were the only one missing. I’m Y/n''

oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh there is no way HAN JISUNG the man who is (partially) responsible for my villain backstory is the eighth member of Chan’s band

“I’m gonna run to the bathroom real quick” I say, trying to excuse myself from the source of my impending panic attack. I speed walk to Chan’s bathroom and lock the door behind me. Once I get the feeling that I’m safe, I slide my back down the door and sit on the floor, bringing my knees to my chest and burying my head between them. Then I try to regulate my breathing before I start hyperventilating.

Breath in, one two three, breath out. Breath in, one two three, breath out

I repeat it over anad over again until my breathing is as regulated as it is going to get. Then, I get up and fix my mascara and blot away the bits that escaped with my tears.

I walk out of the bathroom and find Chan alone in the kitchen. “Hey Chan, I’m feeling kind of sick so I think I’m going to head home.”

“Are you okay? You were fine when we were at lunch.” he looked concerned. Great, now I feel bad for lying

“I just got really bad cramps out of nowhere. And you know I get crabby wehen I don’t feel very well.” I try to end the conversation quickly so he doesn’t catch me lying. “Oh, I didn’t know you were on your period. I would have just brought lunch to your place. Let me go get my keys so I can get you home, kay?”

My period? Ohhhh, he thinks I’m on my period. Thank God he thought I was on my dperiod because I hadn’t thought that far into my lie. While celebrating that little victory, Han walks into the kitchen.

“Oh hey. I saw you were looking sick and I wanted to come check up on you” he said while grabbing a soda from the fridge. “Yea I just have really bad cramps.” I lied again.

“That sucks,” he started, taking a sip of his fanta. “Hey, I was just wondering if you went to Fairview High School. You kinda look like this girl I used to hang out with.”

“Uh yeah, I went there. I thought I knew you from somewhere but I couldn’t tell.” I responded. ‘A girl I used to hang out with’ huh. Was I really the only one that was thinking about our relationship for the past seven years. Not gonna lie, that kind of hurt. Because up to a couple moments ago I thought very highly of Han, I still considered him a friend. Because he had been my only friend for so long, I sort of held hope that he would be my friend forever. But I was too naive, I should have known he would forget me. I mean, I’m not that memorable; but I thought I would at least be more than a girl he ‘used to hang out with.’

Not a moment later, Chan comes back into the kitchen with my shoes. “Oh, hey Han. The kids are waiting for you so they can start a new game of uno.”

“Ok. Nice catching up with you Y/N.” I mustered the nicest smile I could at the moment and responded with a bitter ‘you too’ before moving to hop off the counter to put on my shoes.

Chan holds me down by my knees and kneels down to lace up my converse himself. “What were you guys talking about?” he asked after tying the first shoe. “We used to go to the same highschool.”

“Cool, were you guys friends?” Chan asks, now finished with tying both shoes. “I thought so” I mumble, mostly to myself.

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a-cloud-for-dreams · 1 year ago

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Ok so I've mentioned this a bunch of times on my blog by now but I've been trying to speedrun all of the Choices books and I'm so glad I am because there are some underrated gems out there! I'm almost done with TC&TF Book 1 and that book had a ton of love interests so I was inspired to make a top ten list to organize my thoughts. This post will be under development as I play more books or change my mind lol

Top Ten Books/Series

Bloodbound Series - This book is literally one of the best series PB has ever put out. To be fair, it should be under Blades and TC&TF, I would argue that these three books deserve top place. But it would be harder to combine my Bloodbound explanation with the other two fantasy books so here you go. Contrary to most, I did like the first book, wasn't my favorite, but it was a good intro to the series. I like that the world slowly grew as we learned more about vampires and it felt complete and like it had something to say. Thank @gaiuskamilah for my further obsession with the series lol

Blades of Light and Shadow Book 1/The Crown and the Flame Book 1 - I couldn't choose but they're both AMAZING BOOKS ugh I can't say enough good things about them. The choices actually matter and the plot was so good. Every chapter had a purpose and the conclusion felt so satisfying. The scoring system and skills for both books was super cool, we need more books like them <33

Crimes of Passion Series - Definitely a Top Tier MC!!! I liked the mystery (Book 2's reveal wasn't great but the chaotic Thorne siblings make up for it) and Trystan is the best single LI we've had in a while, their dynamic with Rose was *chef's kiss*

Perfect Match Series - I LOVED this series and our friend group/love interests so much. They all felt like unique people with their own experiences and the plot was so amazingly intense. The finale of Book 1 was UNMATCHED we won't ever live to experience something that iconic ever again smh. It took a while for the plot to kick in, which is why it's lower on the list

The Elementalists - I'm a sucker for elemental magic systems/magic schools, and I love our friend group/family so much. Atlas is the coolest twin, and the whole sun/moon dynamic was fun! Being a powerful Sun-Att boosted my ego astronomically. I wish we got another book to see our mom more though

It Lives in the Woods - I like that the premise was relatively simple, along with the game mechanics. Your actions had real consequences and it was more immersive. The flash-forward in the last chapter was super sweet too and I like that the anthology was interconnected. This series also gave us an amazing friend group and set of LIs so I'm thankful <3

Open Heart Book 1 - Simply iconic, grounded in reality, and actually put together imao. It was one of the peaks of our fandom. This book is super nostalgic for me because I'm interested in the medical field, and it's the whole reason I'm posting Choices content here in the first place

Ride or Die - I adore this book. It felt complete on its own EVEN IF IT DESERVED A SEQUEL *side-eyeing PB* and it's a great coming-of-age story with a realistic teen MC. The ending was bittersweet and you felt changed by the experience playing the book

Nightbound - I liked the vibes and the idea more than the execution if that makes sense? I love the idea of Lamrian and how the MC is half-fae and super powerful, but the book didn't have enough time to showcase the supernatural world compared to Bloodbound, which focused on vampire lore. I can probably make a whole separate post on this but yea

The Royal Romance/The Royal Heir - I think, again, I like the vibes of the series more than the flawed execution, but because it went on for so long I kinda of got attached to the characters (mind you I didn't play or finish any of the books) but it's super fluffy and sweet and iconic for Choices history so here <3 a lot of the books like ROE, TRM, and TC&TF are interconnected so it's part of the foundation for the PB Choices Multiverse :) to be fair, it looks like they did a somewhat decent job writing the conflicts for each book?

I have a feeling when I finish Endless Summer, this list is gonna change...

EDIT: I totally forgot about The Heist: Monaco, but it was amazing! TRR/TH should be bumped down to honorable mention, I'll change it at some point-

Honorable Mentions

A Courtesan of Rome - The book took awhile for me to get through but my MC is legendary and carried the book so it's up here lol. I also liked that it felt like a historically accurate book?

Platinum - Cool commentary on the darker sides of fame and the music >>>

Veil of Secrets - The plot was interesting, one of my fave mystery books they've written! Also the characters >>>

Mother of the Year - Wholesome and felt finished, def one of the best single books. Also the antagonists were properly despicable so...good writing

Wake the Dead - It wasn't perfect, but I love zombie apocalypse stories and the idea of rebuilding our camp was so cool so idc how flawed it is <3

Foreign Affairs - The ending was rushed and the premise should have been rewritten but more on that on a later date. It was still fun for me to play

Desire and Decorum - I finished book 1 and I really liked it! it's basically the Choices version of Bridgerton, not historically accurate but super entertaining. The vibes and the LIs were amazing

Kindred - Pacing issues but still entertaining, I love the witch lore that they had in the book and the focus on building both platonic and romantic relationships so I'm not complaining

Top Ten Love Interests In No Particular Order

Trystan Thorne

Bryce Lahela

Kamilah Sayeed

Damien Nazario

Kaine Bell

Raleigh Carrera

Aerin Valleros

Jax Matsuo

Colt Kaneko

F!Hayden Young

Honorable Mentions (Again, No Particular Order)

Drake Walker (listen LISTEN I don't like that he sidelined other LIs, and I absolutely HATE how his character was a total contradiction, it was executed poorly, but I like the idea of his route if that makes sense. Some of the banter was cute and I love the whole grumpy x sunshine trope. I'm pretty sure he took a bullet for me lol)

Raydan Lykel (Solely because I haven't finished the series yet)

Mal Volari (He would have been in Top Ten but I had to bump him down because his Book 2 Route isn't working)

Tyril Starfury

Nia Ellarious

Prince Hamid

Tatum Mendoza

All of the Nightbound Love Interests are amazing I just couldn't fit them on the list

Gaius Augustine

Alana Kusuma

Rainier (Kindred)

Thomas Mendez

Flynn O'Malley

Olivia Nevrakis (she had so much potential omg)

Robin Flores and Sofia Russo (in my world, they're LIs just shush)

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comicaurora · 2 years ago

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I heard you mention Kekkai Sensen/Nightow on the Guess that Tune stream and since I’m currently in the throes of a Trigun addiction, I wanted to know if you’ve seen Trigun (98 or Stampede), and if so, what are your thoughts on it?

Also is Kekkai Sensen good? all I know about it os that its ending song SLAPS

Yea, you know, that one manga with the dopey-looking goofball protagonist who's actually concealing untold eldritch power he can't really control that hurts him when he overuses it, who grapples with intense guilt over his role in being passively complicit with something terrible that happened to a woman he loves even though she doesn't hold it against him and in fact made an active self-sacrifice to protect him, and now he hangs out with a crew of extremely cool people even though he's basically non-combat, and they all live in a world that's built a workable life and civilization out of the remnants of a literal apocalyptic nightmare event. That one manga by that one guy. Fun stuff!

I think at this point I've finished every form of Trigun media, although I read through the manga a while back and don't remember a lot of the details. I like it a lot! I really respect any story that unpacks the true depth and difficulty of being a pacifistic hero, and how it can take more strength and sacrifice to not hurt people. I think I liked Stampede a lot, although it took me a few rants to come to that conclusion.

I watched the first season of Kekkai Sensen and liked it, but I honestly couldn't tell you much about why. I just had a nice time with it, I really liked the protagonist's whole Vibe and the character designs were top notch. I'm also a sucker for urban fantasy in general, so "New York experienced a lovecraftian apocalypse and everybody just kinda Deals With It" was perfect for me. Also I was so used to "anime character has their eyes always shut" that I legitimately didn't clock that anything was weird about the protagonist's eyes until he busted out his Crazy Powers - I even had a false memory that he'd opened them earlier and they were normal, it's just such an invisible trope. I thought that was cute!

#asks #media recs #trigun #kekkai sensen

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thebaddesbit · 25 days ago

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You’re my grotesquerie

Chapter 1 - Reminiscing

(Dr Charlie x Lois) 2,072 words

Peeking into one of the rooms, the woman in the bed slept peacefully. Charlie approached her, caressing her face. "Hey Lois, I see your flowers are a little dehydrated" he spoke as if she could hear him.

The only sounds that could be heard in the room was the beeping noise of the heart monitor, a good sign that Lois was still with them.

cracking open the water bottle, he poured half of it into the vase. "I have got to get you some new ones. I know how much you hate peonies. It's sad how much your own husband doesn't know about you"

There were countless amount of times Lois had stumbled into the hospital, drunk and in the worst conditions. She told him that she worked the best drunk, he rolled his eyes upon hearing that. Charlie made sure that he treated every cut, bruise, and gouge on her body as delicately as he could manage.

He also always made sure to give her a little lolipop for her cooperation once they were done, knowing how much she disliked being treated like a child by her doctors. Charlie loved seeing her roll her eyes once he pulled a sucker out of the little jar that he kept on his desk for the little kids, it puts a smile on his face.

"You know you don't have too, im not a child" She still took the candy with a 'thank you', giving him a side hug. He inhaled her sweet scent. A cold, empty feeling, consumed him as she walked out of his office.

(Lois smells like into the night from b&bw btw)

During those times Lois was seeing him, they developed a small bond of some sort, with her telling him a lot of stuff about her self and her personal life.

For one he knows that Lois's favorite flowers were carnations, she hated peonies because they brought back bad memories. He looked at those sad, withering peonies sitting in its vase. He should toss those in the trash, it's not like she would really want them anyway.

She told him about how she truly felt about her husband. she couldn't really stand him all that much after her daughter, Merritt was born.

"His true colors showed after that, he met this chick at one of his lectures ~ name was Redd, Did I tell you he was a professor?" Charlie shook his head no. "He taught Psychology, philosophy, something like that."

"Well shit, the only thing he ever taught me was to never let my guard down too easily. All he had to do was take me out once or twice after we met and that was it, I was in 'love'." Lois made air quotes using her fingers.

"We spent 20 years together, had a beautiful baby girl, and bought a house. Now the only thing that goes on inside that house is arguing and keeping secrets in places where love and comfort used to be".

Charlie grabbed a cloth and some rubbing alcohol, pouring some on the cloth. "now this might hurt, but I need to disinfect it" he warned her before pressing it on the bad cut Lois had on her side, she hissed at the burning sensation. "Can you tell me how you got this?" He asked, applying pressure to it.

"The perp got me while I was investigating a scene, the motherfucker came out of nowhere ~ Shit!" Lois's voice was strained, She gripped his free hand, he rubbed circles on her palm with his thumb to calm her down, Like he did with other patients might he add!

"And you wanna know the worst part about it!?"

"Yea amuse me"

"my coworker, Megan, you met her Im pretty sure, the girl with the straight honey blonde hair? Anyways, she saw him cut me and just stood there, in shock. How are you supposed to call yourself a detective when you can't even properly react in a situation like that. That's something you're supposed to be prepared for before you even get the job!" She started panicking, the pain went from a 0 to an 100 real fast,

"Oh my gosh! I gotta sit down Charlie, I feel like I'm gonna pass out" He stopped what he was doing and helped her onto the-

( mat bed thingy? Idk what those things are called yall get it tho😭😭)

"There you go Lois, you're doing great" she gave him a really? Look

"You make me feel like a child, you know that?" She replied, holding the cloth on her side while Charlie went over to his desk.

"Wouldn't have it any other way" Charlie opened a pack of clean needles, and grabbed some thread from out one of the drawers "Gonna stitch you up real quick. Now this part is really gonna hurt, but im certain you can handle it"

Lois chuckled "I barely handled the last part"

"you did way better than anyone else that came in here to get stitches, I remember getting bit really bad the last time"

"Really now?"

"Yea I contemplated handing in my badge and walking out right then and there" he put the thread in the needle

"I know that child got their ass whooped when they got home, I know I would've"

"Oh no, it was a grown woman. Now I usually like getting bit, but not that hard, I almost had to get stitches myself"

"You like getting biiiitt? Can I bite you?" Lois said flirtatiously.

"Maybe"

"Ok don't move, Im gonna try to do this as quick as possible" he added, getting on his knees so he could access the cut a little better.

He pierced her with the needle which made her jump, he almost fucked up and ripped her skin. "Lois you gotta stay still, umm tell me something else about yourself"

"Like what?"

"I don't know, I usually rely on you to start the conversation, you're very intriguing"

"You mean Im very strange and dramatic" she corrected him.

"Strange in a good way."

"Well thank you. I don't know what to talk about...

She paused to think and take a sip of her drink, he tried to get her to put it down numerous of times, telling her that she couldn't have alcohol in here and reminding her that alcohol was the reason she was in here in the first place. Alcohol made her clumsy and she knew it, but instead of putting the flask down, she took another sip.

"If alcohol's a one way ticket to see you again, so be it" She tilted the flask towards him him when she said that. Charlie rasied his eyebrows in shock, almost "A-are you flirting with me?" He paused mid stitching.

"Nah Im just playing with you. You're a little too young for me, sweetie." He hummed in acknowledgment, a little disappointed.

"Oh did I tell you about my daughter, Merritt?" Her voice strained again, he rubbed those little circles onto her other thigh which got her to settle down a bit.

"Probably"

"So her husband, Ed and I, One night- and I still feel terrible about it to this day, one night we were up drinking, and got a bit carried away. A-and we screwed to say the least.

Oh....

"Did she ever find out?"

"Yea she came home to me, you know.... giving it to him, and thats when I found out they were together. She resents me for that and another thing. Merritt wants to gain weight, right?, there's nothing wrong with that. But 170 something pounds in just 3 months was very concerning, it disgusted me at first, and I told her how I felt."

"Well-

"Now before you get to judging, I didn't know Ed and her were dating until after that night, and I also want to say that what I said about her weight gain is eating me alive to this day, both of those things are, really"

"you know, Im not the one you need to convince, right?"

"I know, I know. Im just asking you not to judge me for that, I've apologized countless times and Im giving her space." She said. He nodded, making the last stitch, softly so it wouldn't cause her as much pain.

Charlie couldn't bring himself to judge Lois for something like that, after all, he wasn't exactly a goody two shoes himself. Yea what Lois did was bad. but frankly he did worse. He was a murderer and in some instances a cannibal, which was much more terrible than something as simple as adultry.

"I could never judge you, Lois" He said, finally closing the cut.

"alright all done" Charlie helped her up, carefully so she didn't pop her stitches. She held onto his shoulder for dear life, her leg was killing her and she was just ready to go to bed. She walked.. well waddled towards the door.

"Oh wait" he stopped her before she could get to the door. Reaching in the candy jar. She rolled her eyes, a smirk formed on her face as she took the green Sucker from his hand, her favorite flavor. "Almost forgot" he smiled.

"Thanks Charlie" she gave him another side hug, him taking in her sweet scent once again, her hugs made him feel warm inside. "You're welcome, see you later Lois". It was always a later, no matter how careful Lois was when at these crime scenes, or really anywhere. She would always end up back in Dr Charlie's office with something wrong with her.. something he needed to fix.

"Alright now, you take care" Lois said before she walked out, grabbing her purse off the counter before she left, the familiar empty feeling returned. and he longed for her, even if she was just a few steps away...

Sad that was the last time he would be able to see her, the last time she spoke to him for a while.

(The patient waiting for Charlie to stop fucking reminiscing:💀)

"Sleep tight Lois" Charlie turned off the lights in the room, waking out to find his patient that he ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT!

he opened the door to room 104, a Young blonde girl laid in the bed, also in a coma. A small red spot could be spotted on the covers, he pulled it back to reveal a large puddle of blood coming from the girls... regions.

Fuckkk just another thing to deal with. He groaned, going to grab some clean bedding, gloves, wipes, and a diaper...

whilst he was searching for those items, he saw the light to Lois's room on. Someone was obviously in there.. part of him wanted to take a quick peek, but he shook that urge off and grabbed the stuff he needed. He'll check on her later.

Charlie was in a rush today so he immediately got to work cleaning the girl up after changing her sheets. He saw what looked like a small tear in her regional area. "Damm, what happened there" He opened her up a little bit more so he could see better, "it's just a small one, should heal in a couple days" Charlie thought as he reached into the drawer next to the bed, feeling around until he found what he needed, a small tube of ointment that should help the healing process.

After slathering that all over the tear, he put a diaper on her, and tossed the bloodied gloves into the nearby trash. Turning the lights out before he left the room.

He needed to go into his office and get some stuff done before his new patient arrived for their appointment.

"What the hell!?" Charlie heard some commotion going on in Lois's room and rushed to her door. Two people were arguing about something he couldn't pick up on.

"NO YOU'RE NOT, STOP!" her daughter, Merritt yelled at her father. Tears starting to bubble at the corner of her eyes.

"Is everything alright in here!?" He interrupted, Lois's husband, Marshall turned to him, a furious look on his face.

"I WANT TO SIGN THE PAPER WORK TO HAVE HER UNPLUGGED!" he pointed to Lois...

WHAT!?.....

#charlie mayhew #nicholas alexander chavez #nicholas chavez #niecy nash #lois tryon #grotesquerie #ao3 fanfic #writters on tumblr #fanfic #hulu #fx

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