#yarn humour
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
I submitted this little guy to the home arts competition at the local fall fair and exhibition. If it wins, I get a ribbon and six bucks. 🤩
Pattern by drewbies Zoo.
#release the quacken#i really hope the fall fair people have a sense of humour#ginger crafts#crochet#yarn#amigurumi#yarnblr#crocheters of tumblr#crochetblr
85 notes
·
View notes
Text
Pulling out a blowtorch fr
#crochet#funny#deadpan#memes#crochet memes#crocheting#knitting humour#knitting#knitting memes#crochetblr#crafting memes#crochet blog#knit#knitblr#yarn#they are not the same#help#ive been gone for a month#lol (unironic)
414 notes
·
View notes
Text
There has to be something, if there were not, then it wouldn’t exist.
Good Housekeeping - February 1947
#1947#yarn#knitting#arts and crafts#vintage ads#vintage ad#advertising#advertisement#1940s#1940s ad#1940's#1940's ad#funny#humor#humour
15 notes
·
View notes
Photo
🎉🥳🤪 @allfreecrochet
Link to my blog/website: https://crochetml.com/
https://crochetml.com/free-crochet-patterns/
#yarn#fiber#fiber art#fiber arts#fiber artist#fiber artists#crochet#crocheting#crocheted#crochet humor#yarn humor#humor#humour#cute#love#funny#lol#lmao#craft#crafts#crafting#crafty#handmade#diy#how to
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Knitting With Maya
The great knitting monstrosity is nearly complete. What is this monstrosity, I hear you ask. Surely, you Maya, the keeper of taste and refinement, are no creator of monstrosities? Well, monstrous is in the eye of the beholder and while this is a very pretty project it did kinda get away from me. It was meant to be a quick knit. A respite from the speed and frenzy of the Christmas…
View On WordPress
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
I know we're all focused on Satyr/Faun König but that bull comment... I'm quite partial to minotaur's and whats better than a darling who isn't from the area. Oh yes she's innocent of the crimes against König because she was not raised there.
Some foreign little creature just running blind in a maze trying to see where there might be a way out. It's been days after all and the screaming has gotten quieter and she wonders if she's the last one left alive. He takes his time eating his meals... this can be stretched out for such a long time as she hides herself in a dead end just a short rest... the darling is so tired unaware of the horrifyingly silent steps moving closer to her little haven. It's just her left now.
@kit-williams I've wanted to write for Minotaur!König for ages!
Minotaur!König x Ariadne!Reader Word count: 5 k oneshot Tags/warnings: Sexual tension, threats of violence and rape, implied cannibalism, power imbalance, moral ambiguity. Predator/prey dynamic, Beauty and the Beast elements, Ancient Greek religion & lore. 18+ MDNI A/N: The Minotaur in this story is not an actual hybrid. Reader is Hecate’s initiate. Merry Christmas y'all! <3
EDIT: PART 2 HERE
The screams are the worst part.
They echo through the Labyrinth while you wait and wait and wait.
Even the very stones seem to cry and wail as you place your hope on Theseus who descended to this hell along with you and the human cattle. Seven young men and seven unwed women, meant to satisfy a beast...
And judging by the screams alone, it sounds like the monster is satisfied. It sounds like it's having a ball.
Fourteen lives have been lost, their blood swallowed by the earth as if Hades himself is drinking the crimson of Athenian youth in His feast. The flesh is the beast’s to devour: an underworld demon born of tainted lust.
Half bull, half man, you always thought the stories were only tales told by the fire to scare children. Turns out that the stories, for once, are true. There's something even worse in this maze, something cursed and foul... Hecate herself would shiver if She were here, in the womb of the earth, witnessing what you’re witnessing now.
You don’t actually see the Bull of Crete cut or hack or slash anyone, and you can only imagine what the monster does to the bloody, gutted corpses of the young. The only thing you see are the hollow, dark walls carved out of soil, sand, and clay, the intestine-like route dug deep into the earth. And you don't have to see the massacre: the screams tell you enough. The silence that follows betrays even more.
Your only light is flickering, waning: the candle will hardly last an hour. If the hero from Athens won’t arrive soon, you will have to leave this place.
And oh, how you want to leave… You were a fool to follow him here. Blinded by love and hope, you thought Theseus of Athens would be your way out of Crete, but it’s clear that the only thing the young hero is capable of loving is fame. The only time his eyes turned to yours was when you said you might be able to help him with a small bundle of yarn.
Red as the setting sun or spilling blood, the thin woollen string is your only way out now. It’s ironic how a heap of twine is the only thing that can help you out of this hellhole, but the Fates always did possess a cruel sense of humour. Your silly daydreams might’ve cost your life, and even if you’re sworn to the dark goddess, you would rather die anywhere but here. In the darkness, all alone, with nothing but eyeless worms to keep company to your decaying bones.
The sudden draft from the outside world is warm but threatens to blow out your candle. It’s a sign from Apollo: if you don’t leave now, you’re dead. Theseus has to manage without you because you’re not dying in this underworld prison because of some man’s stupid lust for fame.
There's only deafening silence in the maze as you scurry up, taking support from the wall as your sight darkens for a moment. You rose too soon: you can’t even remember the last time you ate. And it appears that even the sun god has abandoned you because there's a faint echo of steps in the tunnel, and they don’t belong to a man. They’re too thick, unduly heavy, and it’s not a pair of sandals that are thumping against the soil.
So, Theseus is dead...
So much for the legend, the myth, the demigod.
Heart thumping in your chest and in the hollow of your throat, it threatens to drown the sound of approaching footsteps. They’re all dead, the people who descended here with you. The only thing you are right now is prey. You're being hunted; whether the Minotaur knows you're here or not, you know you're being hunted. You can feel it in your gut.
You cover the candle with one hand, hoping that the flickering light doesn’t reach around the bend. The falling thump of the footsteps stops, and you still your breath, hoping that the beast would turn around and search the other way.
You hear it sniffing behind the wall. It's trying to catch your scent in the air, the smell of dread and terror, sweat so thick it must reach his nostrils and make them flare with lust. Your heart is thundering in your chest, and the tunnel is so quiet that that you’re certain the creature will hear that, too. (Your heart always betrays you.)
And your luck is cursed.
The beast shifts.
You can’t see him yet, but you can hear it: the scraping sound underneath his feet as he aligns himself anew, choosing the path that leads straight down to you.
“Hecate save me,” you whisper into the air that seems to grow denser as he approaches, loud thumps of feet now accompanied by metal grating against clay.
“Hear me, flame-bearing guide... Darkness, protect me…”
He’s dragging bronze against the wall, announcing that he’s carrying a weapon with him, the strength of a bull apparently not satisfying enough if he wants to break your bones with metal.
Don’t blow out the candle...
If you blow it out, you’ll die.
It’s a clear message, a knowing voice in your head that says it. It’s not young, it’s not old: just knowing. Alert. Wise beyond ages.
So you still your breath and wait.
Shadows fill the curve of the tunnel just before he emerges: thick like thunder, a darkness so deep that even the name of the twilight goddess escapes your tongue.
And he’s big. Bigger than the bulls you used to dance with, bigger than kings, or heroes, bigger than even Theseus, the man you thought was a myth walking. His head is enormous, bigger than the rest of him, awkward and rough like it’s not quite part of him even though he’s supposed to be half ox.
The gigantic, horned figure stops when it sees you. Vast shoulders tense; the fat, double-edged sword falls to his side when he settles to loom between you and your only way to escape this place. You’re oddly thankful that the horrible screeching stopped, but then you notice that his blade is drenched in blood: actually, his torso, thighs, even the buckskin loincloth – the only garment this monster has chosen to wear – is spattered with red dots.
The bronze tip drips with crimson, and the earth drinks it all. Hades is never satisfied: this beast is never full. Everyone who was sent down here is dead: everyone else has met their doom except you. You wonder if your mother would cry if she heard her only daughter died because she fell in love with a fool.
“I killed your hero,” the walls of hell boom.
His voice is thick like tar, dark and foul like it’s the God of Earth himself speaking.
The flame in your hand quivers from fear, and you slowly remove your palm, the tiny candle illuminating the beast with warm homely yellow, making the prominent muscles of his chest even bigger.
He’s carved like the statues in Athens, only, this giant is far hairier than the painted marble heroes of the city. The hair on his chest is thick and wild; it shoots down his abdomen and disappears underneath the loincloth, spreads over his inner thighs, even covers his shins in dark mats. He looks like a wild man, a beast indeed: sweaty, filthy and thick. But you never knew a beast like him could talk…
“A coward, that one,” he snarls, the voice reverberating oddly like it’s a human man speaking from under a wooden mask or inside a clay jug.
And you believe every word he says.
Theseus was strong and able-bodied, but he had built his strength just to show it off. This man’s body speaks of pure, ripe survival.
A hulking shadow with shoulders that barely fit the tunnels of the Labyrinth, with palms nearly twice the size of yours, he’s the myth walking instead of the hero whose blood now adorns that dull bronze blade. The Minotaur who survived his father’s wrath, his mother’s absence, these bleak surroundings, and all the heroes sent down to get his head… His weapon isn’t even sharp anymore, and still, he managed to cut through the sacrificial humans like butter. And what a horrific death it must’ve been to be hacked to pieces by a dull blade.
Is it evil of you to hope that the death of your “hero” wasn’t a quick one…?
Theseus was a fool and a coward, rotten to the core, but you saw all of that too late. He never cared about the human sacrifices or the king’s wrath; he never cared about digging into Pasiphae’s sorrow. He only cared about getting his face depicted on a pot or having his deeds played out in amphitheatres, his name uttered in song, accompanied by harp and flute.
“I know.”
Your voice gets sucked into the earth: it doesn’t echo from the walls like his. It’s thin, damp, and frail, just like everything else meant to walk under the sun instead of stand buried under the earth.
But the beast before you tilts its head a little. It’s curious.
Why would you say that?
Why don’t you cry from hearing the news...? Why don’t you howl out your hero’s name and beg the gods to heed your grief? Why don’t you run away from a monster?
The candlelight is puny and weak, but it’s bright enough to bring out the eyes of an animal. You draw breath in the dampness of the earth when you finally see it: the bull’s head is devoid of eyes, and yet, the beast still has them. Blue as the summer sky, stern as the death grip of winter just before spring.
There’s nothing but ripped shreds of skin where the eyes should be, and instead of looking at you from the sides, they’re greeting you from the front. The horns are sturdy, but otherwise, the colossal head is a bit skewed... Thick patches of fur sticking out as if it was years and years old, and then – you realize it’s not his head; it’s only an illusion.
There’s a man under there. A full, grown man who’s made himself a terrible helmet out of a bull’s carcass.
“You’re a man,” you say out loud, earning yourself another shift of the colossal head.
“...What?”
The muffled echo confirms it: he’s speaking from inside the bull, moving only slightly to get a better look at you.
“You’re not a monster. You’re just a man.”
His eyes are wild but intelligent; they pierce you from inside the inanimate shield. The large chest heaves, his ribs flare like sails as he draws air through what must be the foul stench of a long-dead animal.
He takes a step, and you shrink, almost dropping your candle and the roll of red yarn.
“You think talking will save you, female?”
He speaks like a man, walks like a man, but his moves are an animal’s. Shoulders slightly hunched like he’s a bull about to attack, you recognize the way his muscles quiver from the times when you used to do bull leaping. You don’t dance with Rhea’s oxen anymore: your tasks at Hecate’s temple are more suitable and less wild for a maiden your age. Back when you were younger and more agile, you used to jump from the back of one bull to the next, clouds of dust swirling around you as you showed your prowess to the priests.
But you can’t charm this ox by dancing. This one can’t be tricked or fooled: he will pierce you with those horns or his brazen sword if you take even a step.
“I can get you out of here,” you wet your lips, noticing that the blue eyes shoot straight to your mouth when you do that. “I know the way out.”
“What makes you think I want out,” he says, so tight and tense that you fear he’s either about to leap at your throat or plunge his sword into your chest.
And you should be concerned about your own safety, not about his sensibilities – if he even has such things – but hearing this beast man’s reply is like drinking bile.
Why would anyone want to stay here?
You don’t know if he eats human flesh; you don’t know if he had to in order to survive. Everyone knows why his father threw him down here, but no one knows he’s not half the things the people above say he is. And if half of it isn’t true, what other lies have been told about the Minotaur?
Even most prisoners see the sun, yet this man has been deprived of that, too. He’s been robbed of mother’s love, of father’s mercy, of friends and foes, of mentors and guides. He’s been robbed of life, of stars, of fires and summer skies, of women’s giggles, of fistfights with fellow men. Of songs and plays, of festivals and games, of bull dances, and maidens that leap…
“Have you ever been up there…? On the surface?”
You turn your voice into soft water on pebbles, a soothing pour of persuasion and goodwill. His pecs contract, strong abs under thin hair and body fat bunch like you’re about to hit him there. You take a step, and now it’s his turn to shun away. It’s only half an inch, but he actually moves away from you.
“I can take you there,” you offer gently. “Have you ever seen the sun…?”
It’s like talking to a starved predator, trying to entice them to follow you with a fresh steak in hand, hoping that the fanged mouth won’t take more than was promised if it decides to accept the offering.
And the beast accepts.
“As a boy,” he grunts, a tad more softly.
Those eyes are fixed on you, reminding you of horses when they’re slightly afraid. The glint of white and blue behind the carcass is fiercely alive, quite unlike the hollow, disinterested stare of the Athenian hero who was only interested in himself.
But this beast is interested. Oh, the Bull Man of Crete is wildly, fiercely curious about you.
“You’ll take me to the sun,” he repeats, an affirmation rather than a question.
“Yes. To the surface. I promise.”
He moves. Like an animal who learned long ago to drive others into the corner so that he wouldn’t get forced there himself, he’s primal, sensual in the way that oracles in a trance are sensual.
Approaching you in silence that’s almost eerie, the hairs at the nape of your neck stand on end by the time he’s only an arm’s length away. Why announce his coming earlier if he can move so quietly?
“You’ll lead me to my father.”
His gaze bores into you, and not even the warm draft from the tunnels can prevent you from shivering. He’s distrustful, and it’s no wonder. It must be odd that some girl with a candle and a bundle of yarn is suddenly waiting for him around the bend, and doesn’t even flee. He’s a behemoth, but he’s not stupid. A stupid man would not have been able to survive, let alone thrive in this place.
And why should he trust you? Who is he supposed to trust in this maze when every person he has seen has either run away from him or tried to kill him? His father will slaughter him if he ever escapes the Labyrinth, so what else is a priestess in his kingdom but a squealing mouse, trying to feed him lies and then guide him to the surface and into a forest of spears?
“No,” you shake your head slowly. “No, I promise I know the way. There will be no soldiers–”
You shut your mouth just before a huge palm closes around your throat.
Gods, but he moves fast when he wants to…
The candle and the yarn drop the instant his hand seizes your neck, strong fingers nearly meeting at the back as he squeezes your windpipe ever so slowly.
And he’s so close now. The carcass reeks of death, but the man underneath stinks of plain human sweat. His musk is a peculiar mix of blood, earth and soil, something both stale and invigorating, the thin sheen of sweat and dirt covering his muscles making him look like a common builder. It’s strange that the bull’s head hasn’t yet decayed in this place, that the man doesn’t reek of bodies and bones that must be scattered around like debris further down the tunnels.
Another thing that’s strange is that he doesn’t seem to want to simply silence you.
He also wants to touch you.
A wide thumb strokes the underside of your jaw as he studies you. It slides down the column of your throat, the blue eyes gleaming with fascination when you swallow against him.
He drinks in the sight of you: the lips that part with fear, the frail collarbones that breathe against the side of his palm. The promising crevice between your breasts, the enticing softness of your teats.
You can hear his breath grow heavy under ox skin and bone, the rugged, vicious helmet he has chosen to wear. What lies under, you can only imagine, wherein he has little left to the imagination when taking in the curve of your breasts, your nipples rising to peaks under the thin white linen only temple virgins use.
Seeing your reaction to his touch makes him growl -- he actually growls like an animal, a deep, low rumble of approval rising up his throat when he sees how different your body is from his. How supple and cushy it is, soft and plump like a peach, covered only barely as if to tease a best like him. You wonder if he ever took pleasure in the maidens sent here by the king… If he ever thrust the sword between his legs into their weak bodies before giving them the mercy of his actual blade. Would he even know what to do with a woman, having lived here for so long?
“Please,” you whisper, bringing his eyes back to yours, the ice in them now liquid sapphire of pure want.
Gods… You need to bring his attention back to your offer of help before he sees it more compelling to just stay here and play with his new, plump little mouse. Virgin or not, you wouldn’t survive a mating with this man.
“I swear on Hecate’s torch that it’s not a trap. You have my word: I’m a priestess soon to be.”
He’s entranced. Hypnotized by your lips. You lick them to confirm your fears true: the man grunts with pleasure, out of instinct, absentmindedly like an animal who reacts to the sight of a fat, meaty bone.
Oh, he might not know what to do with a woman… But he would try his best to find out.
“Priestess…?” He rasps.
“It’s a holy woman,” you explain. “I serve the Goddess of the Crossroads.”
He snorts, either because he’s not impressed or because he’s downright amused by your vocation. The eyes, warmer, more demanding now, are far from the eyes of a bewildered beast.
“Little female of the crossroads... You will take me to the king. And then, I will kill him.”
He puts weight into his words, tries to make you understand.
He wants you to guide him to his father.
To the King who claims his son is half bull, to the husband who claims his wife was adulterous with an ox. To the King who demands tribute as virgins so that he can send them down to hell. The dark goddess screams justice, but you're at a horrible stalemate.
The gods will curse you for this… They will smite you with a bolt of lightning or drown you next time you cross the great sea if they see you’ve helped this half-beast escape. If you guide him to Minos, you’re a participant in kingslaying, and the gods never forget things like that.
“He’s your father and the king of Crete,” you whisper in fear. “The gods will strike you down–”
“Gods?” He spits. “I piss on the gods. I fuck their corpses and leave them to rot.”
You almost choke on the blasphemy levelled at you. The shadows creep closer, the stare behind the black fur is dark and amused, burning with the crooked wrath of a thousand years.
“Perhaps I’ll fuck you too.”
It’s unnerving that you don’t find the threat wholly unappealing.
If anything, your eyes drift down to the hairs of his chest, to the two big muscles that resemble the work of the best sculptors in Athens.
“Are you a virgin, female of the crossroads?”
His eyes search for your response: they want to see your fear and disgust. You swallow again, arduously against his hand, both caressing and testing you.
The beast leans forward, as if weighing if he could somehow insult the gods by pillaging you. The rough hair of his chest meets the white cloth, it brushes against your nipples as he bends down to have a good sniff of you.
“You smell like a virgin,” he growls.
The hand leaves your throat, only to travel down your sternum. He grabs your breast nonchalantly, a little too roughly, the hot palm closing around the teat and squeezing it like it’s a toy. When you don’t react, he squeezes it again, this time hard enough to coax a whimper out of you.
“Sound like a virgin…”
Without warning, the hand dives straight between your legs next, palm forcing its way through your thighs and curving to cup your sex, moulding around it with barbaric thirst.
“Feel like a virgin, too.”
It’s thick, hot, and heavy, how he simply tries you through your dress. Fingers testing your folds, he’s clearly enjoying the subtle wetness he finds down there. You can hear another hitched grunt pushing up his throat, rugged and whiny this time, a broken groan that dissipates because of how dry his throat is.
No man has ever dared to lay his hands on you... Many have wanted, but none have tried. Even drunkards and fools respect women who belong to the dark goddess.
But he doesn’t care about the wrath of Hecate. He doesn’t give a shit about the gods. He simply takes what he wants, what falls into his lap. The fifteenth offering, but he doesn’t seem to be interested in devouring your flesh.
How easily he could simply yank that loincloth aside and drag your dress up. Force his cock into your tight, wet heat without uttering a word. You doubt that he would even take the trouble of laying you down on the ground for taking... Beasts rut when they want to: this man could fuck you against this wall if his loins demanded so, guttural groans being the last thing you hear before the candle goes out.
You don’t know if you have to spread your legs for him before this is over, but you reckon you will do even that if it means you’ll see the sun again. You’ll endure every thick thrust, and gods be cursed, you wouldn’t even be solely disgusted if this half-animal chose to breed you... As shameful as it is, you would somewhat enjoy having him rut you like an animal in heat.
And you’ve gone mad, surely.
You want to touch him too, just to test another theory.
Deciding that it's a good idea to stick your hand into the maw of hell, your fingers lift. They meet his bicep, and the lewd panting stops.
He’s not even breathing… He’s just drowsy and drunk, looking at you with a mixture of soft sleepiness and awe in his stare. Like a dog who has never been petted, even his eyes drift half closed when he forgets to threaten you, now focusing solely on your hand.
And you start to caress him, slowly, so slowly… Tracing the muscle all the way up where it meets the shoulder, you stroke even the thick cord that leads to his neck. The rest of him disappears under the bull, but the man behind it already shivers under your touch. He even bends his head a little in hopes that you would go under the mask and touch him there, and the gesture reminds you of an animal exposing its vulnerable areas, baring its very throat in submission.
Braving a quick peek down, you notice that the buckskin cloth is stretched high and wide. His whole body is tense and immobile: you could cup him through the soft animal skin and he would probably shoot his seed from a single stroke of your palm.
If this is not a virgin, you don’t know what is...
In a way, it would perhaps be wise to shove your hand down and disarm this man. That way, you would be safe for a few more minutes. Instead, you lay your palm over his chest, right over where his heart should be.
“So do you, Bull of Crete...”
His gaze flickers.
The darkness hesitates, widens, nearly swallows the azure pools whole. But he doesn’t look irate or wild... Only shocked.
It’s an impasse. A thicket. His hand on you, your hand on him.
He surrenders first: the underworld budges before the utterly pure. You bless him with grace the instant he withdraws his hand from between your legs – slowly, reluctantly, like leaving a place that belongs to him. Or to which he belongs…
“I promise I’ll help you, Minos Tauros. But I need you to give me something in return.”
You remove your hand too. Softly, slowly, like a horse master who trains and tames wild things. All words seem to have escaped his tongue: he only grunts, unsure of what a beast like him could give you in return for your help.
“You must promise to be kind to me.”
“Kind...?”
“I need you to behave,” you explain. “No bad things on the way up... No fucking.”
Everything else, he seems to accept, but during the last sentence the Minotaur blinks at you, utterly confused.
“But... You smell like you want to fuck.”
Your jaw drops open a tiny bit. Then you remember that a priestess of Hecate doesn’t gawk.
“I don’t–How would you know that…?”
The beast only shrugs. Then he leans forward and takes another sniff as if to prove it’s true that you want his cock inside you.
“You smell good,” he grunts. “Different... Female, not afraid.”
“That doesn’t mean I want to…”
He even raises his hand to inspect the slight wetness there. Fascinated by the thin film on his fingers, he rubs his thumb in it, probably thinking about bringing it under his mask to get a good sniff of your juices too.
You grab his wrist without thinking, mortified to your core by the prospect of him getting high on your slick.
“Look. We need to leave before the candle burns out.”
The obsessive stare threatens to swallow you once more, so you let go of his wrist and steel your resolve. Scooting down to grab your things, you try to ignore the violent erection still pointing straight at you.
Hecate keep you from offering yourself to this man out of your own free will...
And you don’t have a torch, only a candle and a skein of blood-red yarn, but you know the way out, so there’s hope. There’s always hope.
“I need you to promise me,” you turn at the mouth of the tunnel, seeing that he’s still standing there, in the place where he almost took you like his first whore. As if waking up from a thrall, he straightens to his full height, picks up his sword and looks like a half-human, half-bull once more.
“I promise,” comes a booming voice from under the animal skull. “No fucking… I’ll behave.”
You nod. There's a sense of trust in the air. A promise of hope... It's mutual, invigorating -- life-giving, like the sun and blood in your hands.
You don't know if the son of Minos has ever smiled in here, but from the quick glint in his eyes, you suspect that he's smiling right now, the man under that animal mask. Somehow, it reminds you of the stars in the sky.
“Lead the way, maiden.”
3K notes
·
View notes
Note
15 for timkon if you'd like! (“This is a lot, even for you.”)
“Oh boy,” Kon says, hesitating in the entryway to the microcave Tim’s claimed. When Steph and Cass had called him about it, he’d thought they were exaggerating. In Kon’s defence, Tim’s been on more than a few somewhat unhinged murderboard investigations in his life, and the girls’ claim that this is actually, truly, the most unsettling one he’s done, that he’s locked himself in a microcave and they’re not sure he’s been eating — and are absolutely sure he hasn’t been sleeping — had felt melodramatic in the way only Gothamites can get.
In reality, he thinks they might’ve undersold it.
“Uh, hey, buddy, whatcha doin’?” Kon asks, hovering over the piles of office document boxes that — jesus fuck, is that a LexCorp logo?
He finds Tim in the centre of the microcave next to the aforementioned murderboard, and then he kinda wishes he hadn’t. The focal image in the centre of Tim’s web of red yarn and blue yarn and green yarn and something that looks like yellow caution tape that’s been twisted into thread is… Kon.
Tim is hunched in gargoyle posture next to the murderboard, chewing on the wrong end of a pen while he stares at the board with eyes so far past unfocused and surrounded by such dark bags that Kon’s kinda a little surprised Tim hasn’t like… toppled over and passed out.
At the sound of Kon’s voice, Tim spins on the balls of his feet and hurls the pen from between his teeth at him. Kon rebuffs it with his TTK and when the pen clatters to some scattered manila folders on the cave floor, Tim frowns.
“You’re… real?” Tim asks, lifting an eyebrow to inspect him. When he talks, Kon can see the dark spot of ink on his tongue that really can’t be pleasant to taste.
“Please tell me you haven’t been hallucinating,” Kon requests, and immediately regrets it because he’s really not sure he wants the answer to that.
“Um, n—just like the squiggles in the corners of your eyes when you’re sleep dep—why are you here?” Tim asks.
“Well, this is, uh, kind of a lot, even for you?” Kon replies, and hovers closer to the one working electronic in the microcave besides the flickering overhead light: the coffee pot. There’s nothing but tarry sludge at the bottom of the pot which is definitely contributing to the acrid scent of the cave, alongside Tim’s general state of being.
“Oh,” Tim says, looking back at the murderboard and then to Kon again. He seems to finally register that the subject of his investigation is now in his personal space, because his eyes go wide in addition to glassy. “Oh.”
“Any chance you’ll tell me why I’m the subject of this, uh…” Kon trails off, gesturing at the murderboard. Tim doesn’t write his tacked-on notes in any sort of way Kon can read. It’s not actually shorthand, not the official version of it, but probably some hybrid system Tim’s developed on his own. Whether or not it’s legible to other Bats is anyone’s guess.
“Um,” Tim says, and falls off the balls of his feet to land hard on his ass on the desk where he’s been perched. Based on the way he rubs absently at his knees and rolls his ankles around, Kon gets the impression he’d been crouched like that for way too long. “You’ve been, uh, exhibiting some… uncharacteristic behaviours? For about ten months now, give or take.”
Kon blinks. “I have?”
“Yeah, your sense of humour’s shifted, because you keep finding me funnier than other people in our group,” Tim says. He reaches for the pen he’d had in his mouth, like he means to use it as a pointer stick, and remembers at the last second that he’d thrown it at Kon to test his realness. Kon picks it up and offers it to him. Tim thanks him with a distracted, dazed expression, and then points it at the red lines. “And, um, you’ve been agreeing with me more? So, like, I know you haven’t been replaced by Match this time, because that was all about him trying to argue with me and divide our team. Also, you keep looking at me more when you think I’m not looking, I had to run through so many hours of security tapes.”
Tim points to some pretty damning screen grabs of security footage from the Young Justice HQ that kind of make Kon want to die of embarrassment.
It kind of sucks that Tim is so smart that he’s noticed all of this, but has also completely failed to put it together.
“So, what’s your conclusion, detective?” Kon asks.
“I don’t… know,” Tim huffs, and rubs the heel of his hand into one of his eyes like it’s about to give up on him and he needs to fight it into submission. “And I can’t think of what happened ten months ago that would’ve started a change in behaviour or—”
“Can I give you a hint?” Kon asks, swallowing down the nerves it immediately gives him, just to offer.
Tim blinks. “Wait, you’re aware of the change in behaviour?”
“Yeah, Tim,” Kon says, only keeping himself from laughing at the consternation on Tim’s face by the skin of his teeth.
Tim looks between him and the murderboard, a deep frown on his face. “So what happened ten months ago?”
“Well, eleven months ago, you told us you’re bi,” Kon says. He folds his arms across his chest and tucks his hands under his biceps to keep Tim from noticing them shake with nerves. Not that Tim’s really in a state to notice anything at this point. “And it took me about a month to do some soul searching and figure out that I am, too?”
The furrow between Tim’s eyes gets just a little deeper, like he can’t make the math problem add up. “But… if that’s it, then why are you looking at me like…”
He trails off, staring at the board for an excruciating enough length of time that Kon seriously considers just flying away and hoping Tim’s so out of it that he won’t actually remember this conversation.
“Wait, you like me?” Tim asks, face fever-bright when he looks away from the board to stare at Kon instead.
“Only kind of, like, a lot?” Kon replies, balling his hands into fists under his arms.
“Oh,” Tim says, and finally, to Kon’s relief, his face smooths out into a smile. “Cool.”
And, mystery solved, he immediately loses power to all systems, and slumps into a deep sleep. When he starts to topple forward off the desk like a marionette with the strings cut, Kon swoops forward to catch him. There’s probably a bed somewhere in this microcave, but if there is, it’s completely buried by Tim’s boxes of files, and Kon doesn’t want to dig. He cradles Tim in his arms and carries him out of the cave into the uncharacteristically pleasant Gotham evening, and when Tim burrows closer into his chest and murmurs, “like you too,” Kon can only smile.
139 notes
·
View notes
Note
do you think Ariadne accepts Dionysus's children as hers too? She is very loyal to her husband, so I only see Castor, Pollux, Dakota and any other child born to Dionysus being automatically "adopted" by her too or "I'm going to mess with my husband ( ╹▽╹ )" and claim his children as her right after him do the announcement (poor kid)
i.g:
Dionysus: this one is mine, don't worry *see the sign in the kid's head* ... My grape!
(they're both extremely cute together and the kids suffers with this)
Oh yeah, I can imagine that being the case. Between her and Dionysus when Ariadne was still mortal, apparently they had a lot of demigods; so in terms of demigod children, she probably understands this is just him being a god and still loves her greatly, so it’s just probably filling a need once in a while; why else we see only a literal handful of Dionysus demigods.
So yeah, I can imagine Ariadne accepting Dionysus’ demigods as her own in a way, much like Poseidon’s godly wife, Amphitrite, being very cool to his demigod children. Heck, Amphitrite made cookies for Percy! So it’s not out of the question.
Thus insert the amount of godly shenanigans just between this husband and wife that the Dionysus’ demigods are subjected to. It's also been confirmed by Percy that Ariadne has a strange sense of humour, so yeah I can see that scenario happening a few times, which is practically all the time
What’s also nice to know is that Ariadne is the Cretan Goddess of Labyrinth and Paths, right before she was absorbed into the Greek pantheon. So you can imagine there’s some connotations…afterall, if you’ve ever been in a Labyrinth before, you probably have gotten mad trying to get out…but most importantly, just imagine getting minor blessings or gifts from Ariadne, especially those that involve weaving because of her iconic magic ball of yarn, she is considered the goddess of weaving in a sense. Prepare to get a lot of blankets/quilts, sweaters and socks for Winter Solstice/Christmas from her. There’s also a stretch to say Ariadne is to connected to her roman counterpart, Libera, is a minor goddess of wine with chthonic attributes too, so like can you imagine seeing the floating grape floating above the kid’s heads, and people thinking oh Mr. D is straight up claiming them normally, and him inwardly sighing at his wife’s antics. So very, “MY GRAPE!”
It’ll be a very confusing but fun times ahead.
Thanks for the ask and I hope you have a nice day! ヾ(•ω•`)o
#ask me stuff#ask the scribe#scribe's note#pjo#pjo h/cs#ariadne#child of dionysus#children of dionysus#dionysus#dionysus x ariadne#pjo imagine#percy jackson and the olympians#pjo headcanons#pjo headcanon#dionysus headcanon#mr. d#children of dionysus h/c#dionysus headcanons#dionysus hcs#pjo hcs#dionysus demigod#cabin 12
135 notes
·
View notes
Text
Rating: SFW Type: Longford, multi-chapter, Ford Pines x reader Word count: 7339 Tags: Fluff (lots), no pronouns used, Ford being silly, housekeeper!Reader My other works: here on tumblr and here on Ao3! Ch.1 here In which a simple expedition with Ford goes increasingly sideways and you learn more than enough about thermodynamics to last you a lifetime.
This chapter: Ford shows off in the woods and you get to muse lyrical about him while you tag along.
“Just for the record,” Ford says as he leads you along a narrow path into the treeline. “My brother is right.”
Stepping carefully over a fallen log, you glance up at him and frown, confused at his meaning. “How so?”
Ford watches you from the corner of his eye as he walks, a tiny smirk ghosting across his mouth. “Technically, I am experimenting on you….”
Oh shit. Your stomach somersaults nervously. Just how much of that conversation did he overhear….?
“He was just kidding around,” you hurry to clarify, attempting to brush Ford’s comments off with a weak laugh. “I'm not-!”
“Oh, so you don't enjoy being my test subject?” Ford asks, and much to your surprise, he seems to be fighting a teasing grin. “You wound me.”
You’re so taken off guard by his unexpected ribbing that you almost trip over your own feet.
Though Ford has his own wicked, dry sense of humour hidden underneath his many layers, it isn’t often that he dares to be so outright playful with you.
You’ve had your moments with one another, no matter how rare, and though you’re not the strangers you had been at the beginning of your job, it’s still always a surprise when he acts so impish around you.
From the moment you’d come on board, it had been crystal clear that Stan was the social butterfly out of the two. Even with his occasionally grumpy demeanour, the man is capable of bantering over absolutely anything, of spinning a yarn about the stupidest of things on the spot like it’s the easiest thing in the world for him. He’s joked with you plenty of times before that he’d been the twin to soak up all the charisma in the womb while Ford had gotten everything else and for the most part, he isn’t entirely wrong.
In areas of a more extroverted nature, you’ve noticed that Ford lacks his brother’s (sterling) silver tongue, for the most part.
Not necessarily because he can’t don it himself but more because, although you think it would pain him to admit his shortcomings, he seems to struggle with such things.
Ford is stiff around people he isn’t accustomed to and the best of his communication skills generally extend to a very specific set of circumstances. He isn’t completely incapable of interacting with other people outside of his own bubble. He just…. Isn’t the best at it.
You often overhear him laughing and messing around with the kids or, when they’re not bickering, his brother. Their conversations flow easily and, although Stan has suggested that might not have always been the case, Ford is naturally more relaxed around them. He can let his guard down.
It’s understandable. They’re his family and his safety net. For Ford, interacting with them is much easier than interacting with a stranger and he knows his audience when he talks to them. He knows what to expect and he can comfortably risk being more open with them.
But, in Stan’s words, Ford is still adjusting to returning home, both physically and socially, and he struggles to extend that grace to others.
Your initial meeting with him had been…. Tumultuous, to say the least.
Your second week on the job, you’d wandered into Ford’s study in order to clean it, only to find yourself shoved face-first into the wall barely seconds later, your body forced flat against the panelling and one arm twisted painfully up behind your back while Ford had barked orders to his family about ‘dealing with intruders’ and ‘fetching the crossbow’.
It hadn't been until Stan had come careening down the hallway, shouting his head off at his brother and swiftly negotiated your release, that Ford had seen fit to let you go.
To his credit, Ford had offered several apologies (though only after he had chastised you for entering without knocking) and so far, it's never happened since.
But from that point onwards, getting more than a single word out of Ford had been downright impossible for the first couple of months in your time with the Pines.
Elusive, severe and not particularly interested in being any less of either when it came to you, Ford had avoided you like the plague. Whether out of embarrassment or pride at your less-than-stellar introduction, or something else entirely, he hadn’t made much of an effort to try again and so you’d barely had the opportunity to say a word to him to rectify it.
Where the kids were desperate to interrogate you about your life or your time in town, and where Stan was pleased to have someone new to pick on, Ford had oscillated between staying hidden within the confines of his own private space, blinkered to your existence, and behaving like his own miniature storm, sweeping in and out of the house with the purpose of a man possessed.
And when he had shown his face, on the rare occasion he chose to step foot outside of his study or his lab, he’d been brusque and far too caught up in his tasks to deign you, the newcomer, with any sort of acknowledgement.
Admittedly, you’d been left disappointed.
Ford had caught your attention immediately (how could he not?) and his lack of reciprocity had only served to increase your interest. Yet any tiny moment you’d seized to see if things might change, be it passing one another in the hallway or being roped into joining the kid’s games, had only gone down like a lead balloon.
When the two of you had been left alone, Ford had been even worse: Switching from his severity to being skittish or dismissive each time you’d attempted to strike up polite conversation and even so much as a simple 'hello' had been enough to make him freeze up.
Right up until he’d almost burnt the skin clean off of his hand one dull Tuesday evening, that is.
On silent feet, he’d flown through the kitchen doorway at the exact same time you’d been passing through it yourself, colliding solidly with you and sending the lukewarm mug of coffee in your hands flying, its contents tumbling to the floor.
The mug had been flung halfway across the room, shattering on the stone tiles underfoot, and the only reason you hadn’t joined it on the floor had been thanks to an artful dodge Ford had thrown in at the last second in order to avoid knocking you flat on your ass.
Before you’d had the chance to say anything, he had dashed for the sink, swearing profusely and clutching his right forearm, and after a few moments of watching him flap about, your brain had recovered in its shock and you’d sprung into action to help him.
As it had turned out, Ford had apparently been doing some spring cleaning that evening and while carrying what he presumed to be an empty jar, a small amount of liquid (which you’d later learned to be aged sulphuric acid) had seeped through a crack in its glass and immediately eaten into the thin skin of his palm.
With him lacking in dexterity, you had slapped on the cold tap and forced his hand underneath it immediately, instructing him to stay still until told differently while you’d wracked your brains to remember your high school science safety classes.
“You didn’t spill it anywhere else, did you?” You’d asked, alarmed.
“What am I, an idiot?” Ford had scoffed.
“Says the man moving chemicals without gloves,” had been your curt reply, and Ford had quietened down a little after that.
The burn hadn’t been too bad, thankfully. Nothing more than a pink, dime sized mark had been left by the time you’d let him take his hand out from underneath the stream and even though he’d protested that he’d be perfectly fine with just a band-aid, you’d forced him to sit at the kitchen table and allow you to give him some actual first aid.
Half an hour and a roll of bandages later, and Ford had managed to hold his first proper conversation with you.
Granted, most of it had been on the topics of various sciences and such, but it had been a conversation all the same and you’d been secretly thrilled to have it.
He had even helped you to clean up the mess on the floor, too.
The next time he’d seen you in passing, Ford had offered you a curt nod and a small, wary smile. A miniscule improvement upon being ignored or run away from, and just enough to raise your hopes that he might not entirely hate your existence.
And, like the erosion of his own epidermis, a new part of Ford had been exposed to you over time.
Ford had (very, very slowly) come around to the idea of having you in the house, and with each passing day, he’d warmed up to you some more.
Passing nods turned into stiff little 'hellos' in response to your own greetings, and those 'hellos' into 'how are you’s', and before your eyes, the impenetrable ice around him had melted away to expose someone much more human and something far less enigmatic than the front he’d put forward to begin with.
The revelation of his genuine personality had only served to change your natural curiosity over him into something closer to a childish crush and from that point on, you’d been toast. Hopelessly smitten toast.
And although he still struggles depending on his mood, the six months in particular have seen real growth: Ford has been more amenable to chatting with you about his work and even though he keeps you at arms length from the depths of his scientific endeavours, even though he’s still hard to get a read on some days, he’s far less aloof for the most part and every now and then he’ll take a cheeky shot at you when you least expect it.
It always knocks you off balance.
When you’ve recovered from your shock and your brain catches up to your mouth, you find a lame comeback to throw his way:
“I’m not a mouse, you know,” you tell him, primly.
“Of course not,” replies Ford, rather fondly. “Mice are rarely such good company.”
You meet his eyes in surprise and for a second, you share a look with him that you’re not quite sure how to decipher. There’s something warm in his gaze. It’s not unwelcome.
The moment is fleeting and almost instantly, Ford looks away and clears his throat. His strides extend until he’s practically power-walking ahead of you along the forest’s path, his back to you and his voice hardened again as he slips back into the familiar, commanding personality you’re much more accustomed to.
“Dipper tells me you’ve never been into the forests properly before, correct?” He asks, hands clasped behind his back as he walks briskly.
You trot along to catch up with him a little, shaking off the odd feeling. “Correct.”
Ford nods. “Then allow me to give you a run down of how things work out here,” he says, and abruptly, you realise you’re about to witness one of the first special circumstances in which Ford’s communication skills make a rare appearance:
When he takes charge.
Ford snatches control of the reins during any situation that (in his opinion) requires a clear leader and it’s as intimidating a trait as it is admirable.
According to Stan, he’s gotten better at being slightly less militant around the kids, but old habits die hard and you’ve seen him turn on this persona plenty of times before.
Part of you often wonders if it’s a symptom of his time in the portal. If he’d been all alone, thrust head first into (what you can only imagine to be) exceptionally dangerous situations, he’s probably learnt to lean on it for survival.
The other part of you knows full well that Ford is a smart guy anyway. Of course he takes charge when he’s the authority on the subject.
Sometimes, however, you have a suspicion it might be reactive: You’ve noticed that he has a tendency to smother his awkwardness with that bossiness at times. He tries to hide it and make the change seem casual, but it’s obvious when you look a little closer that he’s attempting to claw back his footing and come out on top again. A defence mechanism of sorts.
Telling others what to do comes naturally to him and he can often rely on it a little too heavily sometimes. It can make him come off as a bit of an asshole (see: very much like an asshole) and it’s taken some time to get used to, but you do your best not to take it too personally.
Unless he’s being particularly obnoxious, it’s easier to let him get on with it than it is to fight him. You’ve tried before and it hasn’t gone well.
“Rule number one,” says Ford, holding back a low hanging branch to allow you room to duck underneath it. “Stay close to me and don’t wander off. There are things out here that are much worse than your average predator and they’re not fond of disturbances, trust me.”
Ford’s tone holds gravity; undoubtedly he’s speaking from a place of practised experience with that exact scenario.
“Rule number two: You do what I say, without question. Don’t hesitate. If I tell you to run, you move like there’s fire at your heels. If I tell you to stay still, you turn to stone. Understood?”
“Understood,” you assure him.
Though you should be annoyed by how overbearing he is, you find yourself quite taken by seeing him out in the field like this.
It’s a new environment in every way for you and for all that you’ve heard about his adventuring and disciplined nature from Dipper, it’s quite something to behold.
“And rule number three,” he says, shooting you a coy grin over his shoulder. “Is to have fun. This is your fledgling expedition after all and the first time is always the most exhilarating. Don’t forget to enjoy yourself.”
His smile is contagious.
Ford's initial assurance that the trip to the mushroom patch would take you both little more than an hour dies an early death.
He's comfortably confident, as he so often is, that the weather will hold out long enough to allow you both some time to sightsee on the way and despite your anxiety about getting lost or dry drowning before you can even reach the place, you find yourself unable to talk him out of it.
Not because if you put your foot down he'd ignore your wishes, but because it is just so damn hard not to be charmed by Ford's demeanour when he gets all excited about adventuring.
He’s clearly delighted to have an opportunity to put on a display for someone other than Dipper, no matter how much he refutes his brother’s claims of doing so, and you’re more than willing to give him the floor to do it.
Wariness aside, it’s not like you’re not curious about all of the things lurking in these woods. The concept of cryptids and monsters being real is as thrilling as it is terrifying and you’d be lying if you said you haven’t at least hoped Ford might take you out with him one day.
Stanley had informed you that his brother was a scientist with particularly unique specialisms right at the start of your employment, that his areas of interest weren’t exactly what most would consider ‘normal’, and you’d been intrigued by it immediately.
You know that Ford has an extensive lab beneath the lodge and although you’re rarely granted access, he’s allowed you to deliver him coffee once or twice since he’s become a little more comfortable with your presence.
The place is huge, but Ford is a private person and even when you’ve expressed interest in touring it to see his work in more detail, he’s always assured you of its dangers and kept you (quite disappointingly) at arm’s length from the practical aspect of it all.
Which makes today a dream come true.
As he strides through the chilly, grey forest with you in tow, Ford sheds some of his sharper, more authoritarian attitude as soon as he starts to pick out things he thinks you might find interesting.
One of the other ways in which Ford can communicate well, and by far your favourite, is when he's excited. Usually it's about science; perhaps something special shows up in his test results or maybe he discovers a new species of creature, but whatever it is, it's enough to blow the lid off of his usually stoic self and expose the big, curious kid that he carries close to his heart.
He can’t resist the urge to go into detail about his finds and to flex his disgustingly impressive intelligence on those around him.
Stan insists it’s simply because his brother is a geek who likes to show that off to anyone who will listen, and while that isn’t entirely untrue, Ford is absolutely a clever clogs with tendency to be pompous about it, it’s still exceptionally endearing to watch him get so eager about things.
Ford will get a familiar glint in his eye, shove his glasses up his strong nose, and then launch into a spiel about some of the most complex topics you've never even heard of, talking a mile a minute and waving his hands around all of the place as he explains all of it to anyone who will listen.
You're no mathematician, nor a high IQ scientist, and everything he talks about is well above your intelligence level, but when Ford gets like that you just can't look away from him.
Having been prohibited from his lab (and sometimes even his study, for reasons he never clarifies), you’re always ecstatic to hear about what he’s found or whatever he’s spent his week working on, and being privy to his joy offers a rush that not even the most potent of drugs could beat.
The first forty minutes of your walk together is mostly made up of you watching Ford dart on and off the path, scraping things from trees and narrating his work.
The sun’s rays are dull and watery, reduced to a shitty grey by the time it sneaks its way down through the clouds and canopy over your heads, but even its miserable tint can’t take away the shine that Ford gives off.
As you progress through the woods, Ford fills you in on every piece of flora that the two of you pass, pointing out their colours and attributes, and informing you which flowers make nice bouquets and which ones will kill every member of your household when they bloom.
He explains the discrepancies between moss and lichen on the trees, and goes into detail about his favourite types of each one. It’s so sweet that it makes your teeth ache and admittedly you’re not paying much attention to whatever it is that he’s showcasing for you, despite your polite displays of pretending to.
You’re too busy watching him, taking in the way his eyes light up and his silvery hair glitters each time a glimpse of sunlight makes it down to the forest floor. The way his lopsided grin makes his crow’s feet crinkle more on one side and his dimples pronounce amongst his slight stubble.
He’s truly a sight to behold.
Being as unfit as you are, however, it’s challenging enough to keep up with him physically, let alone mentally. Every time he pauses to point at something, you just about reach his side before he darts off again, always moving a step ahead to ensure he maximises his time in the outdoors.
Rule number one might be stay close, but he’s not too fussed about making that easy for you.
Every now and then, though, Ford slows down just enough to return to you, reappearing with something clasped between his big hands like an overenthusiastically happy dog bringing you a stick in its mouth. The first couple of times had been to show you some different types of plant life or tree bark, but this time is different.
This time, he waits for you to catch up to his side before he nods to a large, plum coloured bush that rises up above your head a little way. Its leaves are long and slender, and they almost look like hearts.
Their faces are marred with silvery, chevron-shaped markings that curve over and reach down to the tips of each one, and the leaves are so dense that you can't see inside no matter how to crane your neck.
You look up at Ford, who is practically puffed out with how much he's enjoying himself, and he puts a finger to his lips before leaning down closer to you.
“This is a form of persicaria microcephala, sometimes referred to as Red Dragon.” Ford says, voice hushed. “They’re not native to this country, you’ll find them primarily in China or Britain, but we’ve got a few bushels dotted about around here.”
Unsure as to why he feels the need to whisper the fact to you, you simply nod.
“But,” Ford continues, clearly picking up on your silent confusion. “Ours is more literal than the stuff you’ll find abroad or in cheap garden centres….”
Careful not to be too rough, Ford slowly pries open an area of the bush with a practised touch and nods for you to peer inside.
You're a little wary at first; you're not in the habit of sticking your nose into wild things in a town like this, yet you know Ford isn't going to set you up to land in harm's way on purpose. You trust him enough to give him the benefit of the doubt.
Cautiously, you lean up to peer into the small clearing he's made and feel your mouth drop open.
On the thin stems inside the plant, there are at least a dozen little creatures nesting. They're all about as long as your pinky finger and initially, you assume them to be lizards.
Each one is a varying shade of purpley-red, some darker, some closer to a pinkish hue, and they're so well camouflaged against their setting that it’s a bit difficult to make them out at first.
That is, until one of them stands up from its perch and stretches, cat-like, with a yawn. It unfurls gossamer wings that flutter like a bee’s and hops from one branch to another, aided by them, before settling back down again.
They’re dragons. Teeny little honest-to-god fucking dragons.
You look back at Ford, aware that your expression suggests that your eyes appear are about to fall out of your head, and whisper as loudly as you dare: “Are you serious?”
Ford, who looks exceptionally pleased with himself, nods again. “We call them Dragon Flies, for obvious reasons. Dipper coined the name. Lovely, aren’t they?”
They really are. Dragons are up there at the top of your list of Really Fucking Cool Stuff as far as you’re concerned, and for all the weirdness in Gravity Falls, you can’t say you thought such creatures to be among it. The notion seems too fantastical. Yet, here they are, tiny and utterly adorable in all their glory.
It’s enough to take your breath away.
“I love dragons,” you whisper, grinning through the leaves at them. “They’re my favourites.”
“I know,” says Ford, and in your surprise, you whip your head back around to meet his eye.
He seems a little taken aback by his own words too, like he hadn’t meant to say them out loud, and a redness blooms on the tops of his cheekbones.
“That is,” he clears his throat softly. “I overheard you talking to the children earlier this week about them and I remembered on the way that we’d pass by here, so I just…. Thought you might like to see.”
You can only barely remember the conversation yourself. Dipper had been sitting at the dinner table, sketching furiously in his notebook whilst Mabel had given random, rapid fire requests to help him practise his speed for field work illustrations, and Dipper had offered you an opportunity to try one when you’d passed through to fetch some water.
Obviously, your answer had been 'dragon' and Dipper had scratched out a shockingly good diagram of one in under thirty seconds. It had been incredibly impressive and he had even given you the sketch. It’s still folded up in your bag at home.
You don’t recall seeing Ford during it, though….. Damn his alley-cat footing.
Still, that means he remembers your off-hand comment from so long ago despite not even being part of the conversation, and it makes your chest burn with appreciation that he’d put two and two together like this, just to show you something you might find fun.
You laugh softly under your breath, restraining the happiness that surges through you so that you don’t frighten the Dragon Flies, and Ford’s nervous expression melts into a lopsided smile of his own once he realises you’re happy with his offering.
“Thank you,” you say quietly, with as much meaning as you can heap into two words.
Ford shrugs one shoulder, his attempted nonchalance overwritten by delight. “You’re welcome,” he says softly. “They’re quite friendly, too. I was a little concerned they might be a risk for forest fires in the summer months but they don’t appear to actually breathe fire. The most I’ve seen them do is burp a few sparks and even then that’s rare. Fairly even-tempered creatures, it seems.”
One of the Dragon Flies turns to glance at you over its shoulder, giving you a disinterested, lazy look as though to illustrate Ford’s point, and your smile grows even more.
After a few more moments of silent, avid observation, Ford carefully lowers the leaves again. “I’m afraid we’ll have to keep moving if we want to avoid the rain today,” he says, sounding genuinely apologetic. “But I’d be happy to bring you back another time. I can even help you handle one, if you’d like.”
As much as you’d love to stay, you know he’s right. You’re already behind schedule. Plus, a second opportunity to hang out means more time to spend alone with him and if today is anything to go by so far, you’ll be thrilled to do it all again.
“That would be incredible, Doctor Pines, thank you.” You smile, stepping away to follow his lead. “If you wouldn’t mind then I’d love to.”
Ford chuckles as he starts off again down the path with you in tow. “My dear, it would be my pleasure.”
Quite suddenly, the forest doesn’t feel as chilly as it has done for most of your walk. Ford’s words warm you up from toe to tip and you’re very grateful that he’s too busy marching along to look at you. If he turned to face you, he would undoubtedly catch the big, stupid grin that’s eating up half your face.
My dear.
My dear.
You’ve heard him call Mabel the same thing plenty of times before. Ford isn’t one for terms of endearment except when it comes to the kids and although you’ve heard him refer to her with several, he’s only ever referred to you by your name.
Up until now, that is.
He’s probably just being nice and playing along with the excitement, yet it rolls off his tongue so casually that it makes your stomach flip-flop.
If accompanying him on a miniature quest is going to result in things like this then you wonder if maybe the next time you cook, you ought to leave your ingredients out overnight for Waddles to pick at as he sees fit…..
The rest of the walk to the patch is amicably quiet, bar Ford's occasional quips about some more interesting things he spots. You’re both content to simply absorb one another’s presence as you move through the forest floor together.
It isn’t long after you leave the Dragon Flies that the wind begins to pick up.
It forces its way through the canopy of fir trees overhead and makes their branches ripple and thrash as it chases through them, tearing out fresh leaves and strewing them across the damp mud under your feet.
The grey clouds above aren't as easily pushed aside, though. If anything, they knit together as if to defend the sky from the gales and their density, combined with the thick trees, only makes it even darker.
Visibility in the forest becomes less and less, and by the time you make it to the patch, Ford swings the heavy pack off of his shoulder and fishes two camping flashlights out from within. He flicks both of them on and hands one to you.
“Just to be safe,” he says. “I don’t want you to trip.”
You thank him and swing the beam around to illuminate the tiny clusters of mushrooms sticking up through the dirt. The clearing they sit in isn't much more than ten feet by ten, the edges lined with bushes and a few gnarly old trees whose roots leech out through the grass in search of sustenance. It’s a quaint little break from the dense trees.
Under any other circumstances, it would look pretty. The place is picturesque and you can imagine sitting down here to eat a picnic and enjoy the view, but right now all you want to do is dig up your dinner and get home to safety.
The weather is ticking quickly over from ominous to outright worrying.
“Let's start there,” Ford says, voice slightly raised so that you can hear him over a sudden, particularly strong gust of wind.
He flicks his torch beam across yours and settles the light on where you're already looking.
“The last batch I picked were from this area so it'll be safest to start here,” he says, coming to your side and dropping into a squat to inspect the scattering of fungi that dot the ground.
Ford lays his torch by his left foot before dumping the backpack beside it. He rifles through the bag until he pulls out a small plastic tub, popping off the lid and putting it beside his other foot.
Keeping your torch as steady as you can so that you can both see what you’re doing, you kneel in the grass beside him and watch as he gently digs his fingers into the cool, damp soil, and breaks off a single mushroom.
The stem is thick and long, and it curves upward until it blooms outward like a tiny, flowery trumpet. The lip of the cap curls underneath just slightly and it has a rich, jewel-pink hue that fades halfway down the trunk to an off-white.
When Ford turns it over in the beam of your light, it glitters slightly, as though it has some form of iridescent quality.
“It’s almost too pretty to eat,” you say, admiring it with quiet awe. “I feel bad for just disturbing it, let alone putting it in a pie.”
Ford chuckles, dropping it into the container. “Don’t worry, plenty more where this one came from. Ready to get your hands dirty?”
“Always, Doctor Pines.” You grin.
Ford matches your expression and you find a suitable angle with your light before you begin to help him unearth more of the things. They don’t appear to go very deep into the ground and the earth is moist enough that it barely takes much effort to get ahold of their stems.
The two of you work in silence. You're sure Ford would be happy to chat but the wind is making such a racket as it passes through the trees that it would be hard to have a conversation at a normal level, and it feels rude to shout at one another in a place as peaceful as this.
The whole place is silent whenever the gusts die down, almost unnervingly so, and you're sure you'll only disturb whatever wildlife is hanging around if you invite Ford into another lecturing session.
You're almost done excavating the mushrooms when you feel the first fat, freezing droplet of rain hit the base of your exposed neck. You've been expecting the rain, of course, but the coldness takes you by surprise and instinctively, you snap a hand up to where it lands, sitting back on your knees and breaking your focus on the dirt to look at your surroundings again.
It's then that your gaze lands on a shadowy figure, standing just at the edge of the clearing and off to the side of a tree.
The appearance is so unexpected that it instantly makes you jump.
For a terrifying few seconds, you forget Ford's presence at your side and your heart feels like it's about to burst through your chest. What if it’s a monster? What if it’s one of the horrible beasts the kids always talk about and now it’s going to tear you to pieces and eat you alive and-
Instinctively, you snap your torch beam up and shine it across the clearing to illuminate the newcomer.
The light lands on the form of a big, broad, red stag.
He's got to be at least four feet tall at the shoulder and the impressive set of antlers on his head must boost that height to nearly six. His body is covered in thick, mahogany coloured fur that's matted at the ends and slowly darkening under the drops of fresh rain.
Definitely not a monster.
You let out a sigh of relief.
Strangely, he doesn't flee when your light hits his face. He stands stock still and blinks back at you with black eyes, nostrils flaring as he puffs out a cloud of foggy breath.
Ford huffs at the loss of light and looks toward you. “I can't see anythi-!”
You shush him, pointing forwards to the deer, and although he seems annoyed at being told to be quiet, he looks at where you direct his attention.
The deer doesn't move.
Ford laughs under his breath. “Cervus elaphus, “ he says quietly. “Just a red deer. Now, if you wouldn't mind putting the light back so I can-”
“It's just staring at us…..” You say, interrupting him again.
The stag still hasn't broken eye contact with you and a feeling of unease settles in your stomach.
Deer are easily frightened, even a flash of bright light would normally be enough to send one running. It's not even close to rutting season, when you might expect to encounter one in a bad mood, and yet this one doesn't even turn its head away.
“Yes, well,” says Ford. “They do tend to do that.”
You know he wants to go back to nabbing the last of the mushrooms. There's an edge in his voice that only ever comes on when he gets a little pissed off about something. You've heard it enough times to recognise it, and yet….. You don't want to do what he's asking. Not yet, anyway.
The stag blinks and huffs another hot breath. Its shoulder shudders reflexively, likely out of irritation from the rain drops that are starting to fall readily now, and he stomps his hoof into the dirt with a wet thump!
You flick the torch further along him to check out his entire body and as expected, he really is just a regular deer, if a very beautiful one. It's not often that you get to see something so majestic up close and having moved here from the city, it's a pleasure to witness. Just like with the Dragon Flies, nature has a way of taking your breath away whether out of admirable wonder or sudden panic.
“He's beautiful,” you mutter.
Even after so long in this town, it’s still a pleasure to see a sight like this. There are no deer in the cities and moving out here has brought with it not just a plethora of new, supernatural creatures, but also an opportunity to reconnect with the old, natural ones, too.
The stag lowers his head until he nearly looks like he's bowing and then flicks it away. Raindrops fly off each point of his antlers as he does it once and then again, each time punctuated by a stomp of his foot.
Is he….. Shooing you off?
It snorts again, moving as if to step closer, and Ford sighs.
“Not the brightest of creatures and hardly the most interesting thing in a place like this. They're ten a penny out here,” he says, clambering to his feet with a groan. Under his breath, you catch him mutter: “Unlike, say, the literal dragons I showed you.”
He sounds a little peeved that you’re admiring such a simple creature in comparison to his own unique reveal and you have to bite down on a smile to hide your amusement.
He seems borderline jealous that your interest has wandered to something so…. Normal.
“Off you go now!” He claps his hands once, hoping to dissuade it from moving further into the clearing but the stag motions again with its head, ignoring Ford's rejection.
Ford frowns. He seems confused by its refusal and again he attempts to encourage it to move on, this time by stepping closer, but the stag remains resolute.
It holds its head up high and refuses to budge, its eyes never drifting from Ford.
Something feels off. Like he’s trying to communicate with you both, playing charades with horns instead of hands.
“I… Think he wants us to leave,” you say quietly.
His presence has gone from being peacefully pretty to setting your teeth on edge.
Gathering up the plastic tub full of mushrooms and keeping your movements slow and cautious so as not to spook the stag into panicking, you pack away your things.
You've collected more than enough fungi for both cooking and experimentation now, and the rain is falling steadily now. You'll both be soaked before long and you're about ready to get out of here anyway. The stag is just an easy excuse.
Ford glances down at you, brow raised. “I didn't know you spoke deer.”
Quite chivalrously, he offers you a hand to help you to your feet and you take it. His touch is warm, if a little gritty with dirt, and his palms are rough from the callouses that come with his hard-labour lifestyle.
You try not to notice how nice his hand feels in yours.
“You've no idea how far my talents extend, Doctor Pines,” you say dryly, ignoring the way your knees scream with effort after spending so long glued to the cold ground. “I’ll have you know that I'm fluent in Cervus quidvis.”
“Quodvis,” Ford corrects automatically.
“I’m fluent in know-it-all, too,” you add, rolling your eyes. “Now get the rucksack and let’s do what he says before we get any more drenched.”
Ford looks down at you, caught somewhere between being affronted and laughing at your quip. “I’d have thought twice about bringing you along if I knew you were going to be this bossy,” He smirks, half-serious.
“Takes one to know one,” you retort, struggling to stifle a smile of your own.
You give the stag a small wave (which does make Ford laugh) and lower your light so that you can tuck the tub into a side pocket of the rucksack.
“Sorry for bothering you, buddy,” you tell the stag, who doesn’t even blink.
You can feel Ford’s eyes on you and although you know he probably thinks you’re mad for trying to converse with the thing, you feel compelled to let it know that you mean it no harm.
Maybe it’s paranoia or maybe you really are going insane, but it feels important to do. The uneasy feeling still hasn’t passed and if talking to the local wildlife makes you feel better then you’re not afraid to be judged for it.
It seems to be appeased by your reaction, whether it's the apology that does it or the fact that you're clearly moving on, and the stag gives one last snort before it launches off into the bushes again.
The sound of its galloping hoofbeats is swallowed by more wind and you wince against the chill it brings with it. Alone it’s bad enough but being even the slightest bit damp only enhances the feeling.
You suppress a shiver.
Before you leave, once he has the backpack over his shoulder again, Ford reaches into his back pocket and procures a little bag of what look to be shiny stones. They glint, even in the dark, and he empties them out onto the dirt where the mushrooms had been.
“Thank you!” He says aloud to nobody in particular, and then he pockets the bag again.
It’s your turn to look at him like he’s lost his mind and Ford catches the expression.
“For the fairies. They like shiny things,” he explains, like it’s obvious. It probably is to him. “If you take something from the forest, you always give something back. Otherwise the next time you come back they’ll make your life a nightmare, trust me.”
“You’re talking to fairies but I’m weird for talking to the deer?” You scoff, following after him as he starts back towards the way you came in.
“I never said you were weird,” Ford says, checking what looks to be his wristwatch before he guides you back towards the correct path out of the clearing. “I said I didn’t know that you could speak to them.”
‘Didn’t know’? That implies it is, in fact, a possibility to communicate with deer, doesn’t it?
“Wait…. Are you being serious?” You ask, curiosity piqued. “Is that possible?”
If the existence of all the creepy, beyond-natural things Ford has warned you about are real, and you know that they are, then is it really that much of a stretch to consider there might be some weird, hidden language the common deer speaks? Or perhaps some kind of thing that might allow you to do that?
If that is the case then you absolutely must know how to do it. It might not come in useful in everyday life but it would certainly be novel. Deer are privy to all sorts of secret goings on in the forest and you’re sure they’d be a great source of gossip.
Ford shrugs one shoulder as he walks beside you, smirking enigmatically.
Excitement surges through your gut.
“No way, are you serious?” you say earnestly, trotting alongside him. “Will you teach me? You have to teach me. Imagine all the stuff I could ask….”
Ford raises a brow. “Such as….?”
“God, I don't know….. I mean for one thing, what's it like being a deer? What kind of stuff have you seen? What's the-” You cut yourself off abruptly when you catch the look on Ford's face that he's been trying to hide in the collar of his trenchcoat.
He's very blatantly fighting laughter.
You deflate instantly.
“Oh, you asshole,” you huff, swatting at his arm. “There's no such thing, is there?”
Ford breaks finally, laughing the same deep, gravelly laugh that you've grown so fond of over the past year.
“I'm sorry,” he says, breathless with mirth. “Forgive me, you just seemed so invested, I couldn’t help myself.”
You can’t stop yourself from laughing along. You want to be more annoyed at his teasing, but if you’re honest it’s really quite nice to be teased by him. He’s clearly in a playful mood today and you’re elated that you get to be the main recipient of his prodding. You suppose it's fair game for him to give as good as he gets.
“I am serious about the fairies, though,” Ford adds after a moment. “They've quite the set of teeth on them.”
Teeth?
“Noted.”
Please also consider supporting the chapter on ao3 here!
#stanford pines#ford pines#reader insert#ford pines x reader#stanford pines x reader#ford pines/reader#stanford pines/reader#gravity falls x reader#gravity falls/reader#gravity falls#gravity falls imagine#I'm posting this for my US followers to comfort you on election night#good luck buckos#and if you let this flop I'll make you all listen to that horrible Cuban trump song on repeat as punishment
68 notes
·
View notes
Text
“so, you’re going then?”
gojo looks back at you, throwing the other end of his scarf around his neck. you’d told him christmas eve would be cold and though something like the weather would never be enough to kill him, you fear touching his body and finding it icy.
his smile is bright, all teeth. “of course! i have to.”
you curl your fingers into the bedsheets where they still radiate his warmth and it's almost enough to convince you this was any other morning, simply watching your lover leave for work. but if this was truly any other day, you would be sure of his return.
“you look like you have something to say.” he notices. “say it.”
“i don’t want you to go.”
your confession doesn’t shock him. “personal feelings?”
though it had taken you courage to speak your selfish request, gojo dismisses it with humour immediately. worry spins the frustration in your stomach into red hot anger, and then cools into realisation.
he’s just deflecting.
you push yourself up off the mattress and walk over, reaching out to fix the scarf loosely hung around his neck. this wasn't a bad omen, everything will be ok.
“you look silly.” you tell him instead.
“you’re the one that insisted i wear this. it’s bright red, sukuna’s gonna see me from a mile away.”
“it only looks silly because you didn’t tuck it in right.”
you make slow work of the scarf, intentionally playing with the loose yarn on both ends between your fingers, feeling the memories woven into the material.
when gojo was sealed, your days bled grey. there was very little you remember of that time, those droning nineteen days, barely living and barely awake. the school couldn’t contact you, the ringer on your phone not any louder than the rushing thoughts in your head. moving through each waking hour with insincere actions, dreading the return to your static apartment though it was no better than surrounding yourself with friends. how come they were here, but he wasn’t?
and when fate graced you with sleep, you could almost imagine the smell of him, the feeling of his hair between your fingertips, the soft kisses he’d leave about your sleeping face, his annoying giggle as you aroused slowly from your slumber. your eyes would open yet when you wiped the sleep from your eyes, there would be no one there.
“do you think you could tie my scarf any slower?” gojo remarks, eying your masterpiece. “i wonder if it’s possible.”
“babe.” you sigh, sliding your fingers down to the hem of his shirt, fiddling with the fabric. “please, can we be serious for a second?”
his hand comes up and pauses over yours, scratching you with his calluses. “i don’t think i have time to undress right now, i’ve got to save the world and everything.”
you pause, leveling him with a stare. “hey.”
“okay, sorry.” he gives you a lop-sided grin, observing the sight of you looking so small and unsure. you hesitate your gaze around his eyes, fearful in finding what’s there. “are you worried about me? you know you don’t have to be.”
“i wish i wasn’t, it’s clearly wasted on you.”
“don’t say that like it’s a bad thing, you can use that time to feel something else. like immense gratitude that i’m your boyfriend.”
“i just know your arrogance will be your downfall.”
“since when were you a fortune teller?” he reaches for your hand and traces the lines on your palm.
“gojo.”
dropping it immediately, he places his hands in the air. “ok! i’m serious now, i swear. god forbid i make a joke.”
your eyes crease as you frown.
gathering the strength to confront him, you pull your eyes to meet his, intending to scold him for being so relaxed when your pulse was pounding in your head, but his gaze was as empty as the abyss. the corners of his mouth trembles slightly, hand seeking comfort by wrapping around your waist and the cold of his skin shocks you. before you say anything, his smile lowers into something sadder.
the sight pushes you over the edge and whatever mental fortitude you built against the fierce currents of reality comes bursting apart, tumbling just to wash away and he catches you in his arms, holding you in an embrace that’s far too fragile to belong to the stronger sorcerer.
gojo breathes in the scent of you cradled in his arms, eyes squeezed tight to forever engrave this very moment in his memory. if he was to die, he’d like his last thought to be you.
your breath shakes against hurried gasps. “this isn’t fair, i can’t lose you again, you just came back to me.”
his arms hold you tighter, pressing you into his chest. “you’re not losing me again, i promise.”
“liar.” you whisper. sorrow molds into hatred, not at gojo, but at the cruelty of fate to mismatch your timelines such that they never meet for long. “liar! you’re walking to your death and you know it! you think i wasn’t there when you came back practically a walking zombie? you had half your face blown of, and to a non-sorcerer at that! this is the king of curses we’re talking about, you’re, i’m—!”
it might have been better if he argued, if he told you that you’re wrong, but his silence stops you.
“i can’t lose you too.” you finally admit. when you close your eyes, the scene where all four of you still remain mocks you from afar. one by one, you feel their red strings cut away from your own, forever out of reach. and though you stayed working in the shell of where those memories once took place, the eerie feeling that things will never be the same again clung like a persistent ache.
“you won’t.”
“liar.”
gojo’s breath tickles your skin as he exhales. “i’m sorry.”
“tell me i’m wrong.”
“you won’t believe me.”
your fingers dig into his clothes, enough to leave a mark. “tell me anyway.”
he kisses you on the top of your head. “i’ll be back.”
your reply comes through gritted teeth. “you promise?”
you feel him hum rather than hear it, ear pressed against his chest to listen to the erratic thumping of his heart.
“i have to go.” he kisses you again as if to lessen the punch to your stomach.
slowly, surely, you loosen your hold on him and pull away. the sudden lack of warmth is your first taste of his absence, and the smile he gives you is just as bittersweet. your hands find the ends of the scarf once more, looping it once and then once again around his neck, letting it hang loosely down the sides.
when gojo returns, his skin is just as cold, clammy even. you feel the slick of sweat as you wrap your arms around him, screaming your sorrows into the cavity in his chest. he’s still wearing that irritating smile on his face, the one you’ve woken up to so many times before, but the sound of his laughter is a memory you won’t relive again. his palms still spell out his love life, of a short passionate affection that forks suddenly, one line longer than the other and your fingers can still trace the calluses lining his hand. he’s as you remember, exactly as he was the morning he left you.
when gojo comes back to you, he’s still wearing red around his neck.
#gojo x reader#gojo x you#gojo satoru#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#gojo imagine#gojo angst#gojo drabble#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru x reader#try not to include sashisu in a fic challenge impossible#even vaguely they will live on in my writing
94 notes
·
View notes
Text
I love this meme template so much and I'll never let it die
#memes#drake meme#drake#yarn gods#crochet memes#crochet#crochet beginner#crocheting#crochet humour#funny#comedy#crafting#crafting memes#meme template#memey
75 notes
·
View notes
Text
From the same people who bring you bowling balls?
Woman’s Day Knitting and Crochet Projects - 1962
#1962#knitting#yarn#vintage ads#vintage ad#advertising#advertisement#1960s#1960s ad#1960's#1960's ad#funny#humor#humour
17 notes
·
View notes
Video
instagram
😂🙌🌈
Link to my blog/website: https://crochetml.com/
https://crochetml.com/free-crochet-patterns/
Check out the tiktok here!
#yarn#fiber#crochet#crocheting#crocheted#fiber art#fiber arts#fiber artist#fiber artists#handmade#diy#how to#crafts#craft#crafting#crafty#humor#humour#cute#love#fun#funny#lol#lmao
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
Time on my Hands
I would like a round of applause. No really, I mean it. Stop sitting there drinking your coffee and give me a clap. A standing ovation would be nice, but I recognise we’re all busy people so, you know, a hearty congratulations will be just fine. Have you done it? I’ll be able to tell if you didn’t. Shall we carry on? And what is the cause of these congratulations I hear you ask? What…
View On WordPress
#aran wool#christmas#christmas knitting#chunky hats#Family#Funny#handmade gifts#Humour#knitting#knitting hats#knitting patterns#made by me#scalf#sock knitting#sock yarn#speed knitting#yarn
0 notes
Text
#86
Being a hero is stressful. That much is common knowledge. How a hero goes about unwinding from said stress is a mystery no one has yet figured out.
The hero settles in one of the little chairs in the circle. The man next to her gives her a light nudge. “Let’s see what you made this week, then.”
The hero reaches into her bag to show off her latest stress relief—a giant blanket, knitted in the downtime between jobs, sporting a rainbow of colours in bright streaks across its face. Everyone oohs and ahhs appropriately before the rest of the circle gets to showing off their own creations.
It’s been nice to have a place that isn’t entirely consumed by work, the hero thinks as she nods approvingly at someone’s mug cosy. No worrying about tomorrow, no wondering where the villains might be.
Her gaze flits to the next person in line to show something off, and her heart momentarily stops as she meets her eye. At least she doesn’t have to worry about the latter of her thoughts right now.
What the hell is the villain doing at the hero’s weekly knitting club?
“Go on,” the woman next to the villain prompts. The villain huffs and makes a show of it, but she pulls out a cardigan with a ghost of a pleased smirk.
The hero only realised why she’s so self-satisfied when she catches herself gaping in awe. The villain’s little cardigan is elaborate in pattern, swooping waves lining its shoulders. The yarns meld together in a perfect cacophony of colour. It’s amazing, more amazing than anything the hero could do.
The villain soaks in the praise with a humble nod before setting her gaze on the hero. It probably looks hopeful to anyone else, but the hero can see the glitter of arrogance in her eye. Go on, the villain’s practically saying, tell me how great I am.
“It’s nice,” the hero says through gritted teeth, and the villain’s smile turns humoured.
The hero can’t leave fast enough. Everyone else is packing their projects away. The hero’s blanket gets folded thankfully easily and she’s out the door before anyone can stop her.
Fine. A new project. Something to advance her skills and show the villain that she’s not the hot shit she thinks she is.
It takes all week. The hero holds her jumper up to show the group. The villain raises her eyebrows from across the circle.
“Inspired by another knitter here,” the hero says with what could almost be sarcasm, and the villain snorts a poorly contained laugh.
The villain shows off her creation. A pair of mittens, the patterns lacy and the colours bright. The hero scowls. Pissed doesn’t describe the feeling.
Next week. A layered scarf from the hero. The villain wins everyone’s affections with a tiny knitted elephant. “For my niece’s birthday,” the villain says innocently. “She loves them.”
Leaving is becoming more of a race with each passing week. “Keep trying,” the villain comments brightly before the hero can escape. “You’ve plenty of room to improve.”
The hero considers strangling the villain with her scarf.
The hero settles at her computer that evening with a scowl and a cup of hot chocolate, mentally prepared to prowl the internet for several hours for ideas on how to one-up the villain. It’s madness. She’s meant to be out there kicking the villain’s ass, and here she is trying to out-knit her.
It’s been three weeks, and she’s only just realising that her stress-relieving hobby is suddenly a lot more stress-inducing.
“Fuck,” she hisses outloud, and she momentarily considers the idea of knitting the word into a coaster for the villain too.
#creative writing#writblr#writers on tumblr#writing#writing community#heroes and villains#hero x villain#i cant lie broskis!!! work is tiring!!!#ive been working basically fukn above my job title (yes i will be making a big point of this to my boss) and every day im KNACKERED#weve been filmin some stuff for promotional stuff and tho my boss is like 'yea ill sort stuff :)' ive done ALL the planning#its been fun but itll be nice for this week to be over (affectionate)#and i know i say this a lot and it never happens but the queue is genuinely short rn and i am mostly coming home and staring at walls#so if it runs out and things end up a lil late sorry! im just tryna remember how to be human
85 notes
·
View notes
Text
polar.
pairing: lee felix x f reader. genre: nevermore au, fluff, strangers to friends to implied lovers. word count: 1.8K
Main characters are adapted from Wednesday Addams (psychic) and Enid Sinclair (werewolf) from the TV series Wednesday.
(this fic has a minho x reader version on my insta @cattoleeno)
“You sure she’ll wear it?”
“She’d look so pretty in this colour!”
“That’s not what I’m asking.”
March 14th meant White Day.
And White Day meant reciprocal gifts.
For the umpteenth time Felix peeked at the salmon-coloured knitted jumper folded neatly inside a bright yellow paper bag, its thin handles casting an indented red mark on the skin around his left wrist as the result of the length of time he’d been carrying it around the whole day.
Hyunjin usually found Felix’s flamboyant nature exciting given he shared similar qualities, but the siren was worried that day. His cerulean eyes dimmed down a little in a reflection of his concern.
All because her, the very person Felix was about to gift the vibrant jumper to, had a profound affection towards everything in grayscale, prone to dark, to the point that if one took a peek at her closet, they’d only see a bottomless abyss of a black hole. Maybe a small space for whites and greys. And Felix, on the contrary, wore everything but the dreary shades of black and white where it got to the point that if one took a peek at his closet, they’d only see rainbows and unicorns.
She was nearly unapproachable. Or she didn’t let herself appear approachable. The psychic had a disembodied stitched-together hand called Thing on her shoulder—that everyone thought was cool and terrifying at the same time—as a sort of pet, she was especially given a black and grey striped uniform instead of the standard violet that made her stand out, and she spoke deadpan humour that oftentimes drove away most people.
Meanwhile Felix loved to be approached. The tip of his platinum hair was highlighted pink and blue, his socks were always of bright colours, and his werewolf pointed nails were painted in pastels.
If their fashion preferences and general appearances couldn’t tell enough already, they were also the polar opposites in terms of personalities. She inclined towards a small group of friends and was appealed to macabre. While Felix favoured the company of many and loved sparkly, radiant things.
Hyunjin couldn’t entirely hold him down, regardless. Because even though Felix’s curiosity about her had already started since the first day he had been admitted to the boarding school where she had downright deadpanned his choice of colourful pullover, it had never grown past mere curiosity until a month prior, on Valentine’s day, when he’d seen her closely for the first time again in a long while.
Felix remembered that one February 14th so vividly.
How her black-and-grey school uniform made its premier appearance in his periphery. How the whole class had gone silent as she placed down a massive box of chocolate assortments on his desk. How her flat tone was music to his ears, “I don’t know what you like. Just eat them.” How the brief gaze of her mesmerizing, dark irises combusted fireworks in his chest. How the heavy treads of her black platform leather shoes as she strided outside were followed by strained titters from her peers in the hallway. How Thing that perched on her shoulder flirtatiously waved him goodbye seconds before the last strand of her hair disappeared in the hallway.
That day was the day Felix began to believe in love at first sight.
Hyunjin had been the inevitable victim of Felix’s unending wonderment about her cryptic presence ever since. The siren had had to deal with balls and balls of salmon pink yarn every time he paid the werewolf’s dorm a visit and watched him knitting endlessly. Hyunjin just hadn’t seen it coming that the jumper was meant to be given to her. In hindsight, Hyunjin would’ve taken part in sabotaging Felix’s craft, too anxious for the werewolf’s wellbeing should his hard work be outright rejected and should it break his heart.
After all she was allergic to colours. And Felix was but the presence of colours.
“Just curious though, why orange?”
Felix turned to Hyunjin with a dramatic gasp, pointing at the rainbow pullover he had on over the striped violet blazer with his forefinger, specifically at the muted orange on one of the sleeves. “This, is orange.”
He shoved the paper bag onto Hyunjin’s face right against the tip of his sharp nose, “and this, is salmon pink,” the werewolf gave his tongue a disappointed click, “I expect more from an artist like you, Hwang.”
“So, why salmon?” Hyunjin scoffed, emphasizing the last word, “no offense to your preferences, but your colours would look dreadful and horrid on her. I’m currently imagining it and…” the siren scrunched his nose, “nah.”
“I’m imagining it and she looks lovely!” Felix chirped, his sparkly blue eyes roaming dreamily over the dark ceiling of the hallways above.
The Botanical Sciences class she was attending was just around the corner. Hyunjin’s sharp irises scanned the students in groups who had just marched out of the class in case she moved past coincidentally. “Just be careful she’s not necessarily—”
The familiar severed hand crawled across the paving stone floor, avoiding a horde of leather shoes, before it reached Felix’s polished one. Thing’s fingers drummed against the vamp of his shoe gently, pleased to once again meet the happy little werewolf, before slithering back away to its legitimate owner.
Felix squeaked out her name at the sight of a group of three students having just walked out of the class. He darted towards his target in a black quilted sweater over the dark uniform.
“...nice to anyone.” Hyunjin sighed, opting to wait behind one of the corinthian columns. He was not particularly fond of the psychic’s presence, too bloodcurdling for his irradiant nuance, he thought.
Beside her was Jisung, her gorgon friend who always had a beanie on his head to hide his snake hair, and Chan, her extremely attractive vampire friend that had charmed twice as many as a siren could ever have with their singing.
As if the sweet chirp of her name that rolled off Felix’s tongue wasn’t a distressing alarm for her to run off, just like how she would’ve if it were anyone else that called her name with the same sugary tone, she turned and patiently watched the werewolf’s little jumps approaching. Thing had apparently crawled back up to its rightful place on her shoulder by the time Felix stood there before her.
However her face slightly contorted in question and mild disgust when a bright yellow paper bag was shoved onto her chest, the first time any colour more vibrant than the boring shades of black and white ever getting so close to her allergic skin. She sneaked a glance inside and thought it was an odd pink knitted jumper. She raised a brow at Felix without a word.
“White day!” His face beamed with a radiant grin and eyes sparkled in unfaltering enthusiasm as he exclaimed.
“I didn’t get the chance to thank you for the chocolate last Valentine’s but I hope you wouldn’t mind that I shared them with my classmates including my friend Hwang Hyunjin over there.” He pointed at the tall boy who was standing stiffly against a pillar and a little too far.
She hummed, “oh, the ugly man of the night.”
“People genuinely want to be with him. He rarely sings to attract them.” Felix defended.
“You’d be surprised.”
Thing dawdled into the paper bag and tugged at the jumper, rubbing the soft fabric between its forefinger and thumb. Its palm faced her briefly before turning back to the jumper in confusion, as if calculating whether or not the colour would suit her.
“It’s pink.” She announced.
“Salmon pink,” Felix corrected, “works great with black and dark grey like your wardrobe.” Then he nodded at the paper bag, “dark tones suit you best but I do honestly think you’d look amazing in vibrant colours as well. Just for the accent, you know.”
“Looks like a rainbow vomited here.” She deadpanned.
“Looks like something you’d take out of your own closet. You made this yourself?” Chan asked with a wide dimpled grin.
Felix looked his way, noticing how the vampire’s usual crimson irises glinted softer, “mhm!”
“Looks like it’s reciprocated then.” Jisung chimed in, draping an arm over her shoulders to which the latter dodged right away with a single shrug and a glare of warning.
“Of course!” Felix confirmed abruptly, making Chan and Jisung choke on their own spits, “where I come from reciprocating Valentine’s gifts we receive is a form of courtesy and gratitude. Though it seems like White Day isn’t commonly celebrated here.”
“Did you get any more Valentine’s gifts?” She inquired.
“Nope! But I—”
“Good.”
Felix glanced at the screen of his watch when his alarm for the next class went off, having realized the nick of time he had before Werewolf Reproduction class.
“Well, I hope you won’t throw it away,” he grinned, “just return it and tell me if you decide it’s too hideous for you, I’ll knit you a black one next time! Bye, Thing!”
Felix waved them goodbye and skipped his way back to Hyunjin who had been waiting anxiously out of earshot.
🍫🍫🍫
The next day Hyunjin was waiting at the entrance of the quad as usual. Felix’s striped blazer swirled in a gust of the spring wind at his sides as he was sprinting across the field from the dorm, a navy ribbon tying his hair in a half ponytail.
They were running late for the first class of the day.
“You slept in again did—” Hyunjin was about to drape a hand over his shoulder but halted suddenly, his grin faltering, mouth agape at something—or someone.
Felix followed his gaze. But it was as if the sun had just shone a few inches over his head, he beamed. His lips dramatically curled into a broad smile, his eyes sparkled and his chest swelled in pride.
She was wearing a salmon pink jumper.
Perhaps it was because she was always inexpressive that it was fairly easy to notice the light shade of crimson that uncharacteristically tinged her cheeks and ears as she was drawing near. Thing hopped off her shoulder and onto Felix’s platinum head at the proximity, its fingers tickling the crown of the werewolf’s head, making him giggle.
“It’s hideous. Make a black one.” She deadpanned as a matter of factly and walked away without waiting for Felix’s response, mingling with Chan and Jisung who were giggling in the hallway.
“You’re not returning it?” Felix half shouted.
She didn’t say or do anything.
And Felix grinned.
He couldn’t be any more amused and satisfied.
“She’s right.” Hyunjin nudged Felix in the arm, staring down at the werewolf with a sly glint in his cerulean eyes, “she indeed looks hideous. But anything to keep her wolf’s smile, I guess.”
#skz fictions#stray kids#skz imagines#stray kids imagines#skz lee felix#skz felix#skz scenarios#lee felix imagines
22 notes
·
View notes