#yarking writes
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
This is a cry for help
@expresskundalini @asisterwithnomercy @blixa-bargeld @wild-god-nick-cave
Please!! This weird ‘yark salmond’ (who I guess is Marc almond if he couldn’t write properly) guy keeps sending really weird and gross asks, what do I do????? Got my mama, my mamas bitch, my gay wine uncle and my gay wine uncles crush to help me…
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm reblogging this and riding it's coat-tails because I have big thinks on this that won't fit into to little reply blurb.
I'm sure 'you've' heard the adages about opinion and assholes, and religion and penises* (OK, That one is a favourite because it often REALLY pisses off the person it's directed at which admittedly is something that makes my wicked heart happy - so sue me) OK... We've got THAT out of the way -
The short version is. the FIRST RULE OF FANDOM (Should be) Thou Shalt NOT Harsh another's enjoyment. Yes, I admit I used to violate this rule to the point of painfulness. I've never been a fan of the Star Wars Expanded (I honestly tried. but some of it is just so... YARK!!!!) I still crack about 'Artsy Smurf', but there's no actual malice behind it, and I actually like how he was portrayed in Rebels. However, there is one character whom I would happily see wiped from the face of literature and fandom. The character just.... AUUUUURG!! No, wild horses will not pull the name from me. I have friends who LOVE that character, and I refuse to say anything that would hurt them (anymore). I won't read fan-fic about them and I sure as hell won't say a single nasty thing about a story that features them. It's really not that hard to do. I have a rather particular taste in my choice of Fan-fiction readings - Maybe it's a side effect of being 'Neuro-Spicey ' (That's a new term to me - never considered if I am 'on the spectrum' but I'm old and that's just not something that was considered for us 'gifted weird kids'). In my current 'what tickles' I'm still drawn to 'cannon compliant/leaning' stories. I'm not super fond of 'character A/U' (I DO like some story A/U's like Kanan Jarrus Lives because we were robbed) but where Aziraphale and Crowley are Human? I'll probably hard pass. Am I missing out on an amazing story? Very probably, of hits/kudos/comments and recs are anything to go by - Hey, it's like the Star Wars EU! There are shed-loads of books I wouldn't use to start a campfire with but there are millions of people out there tat think differently. The DIFFERENCE is, me not liking a book or even a character isn't going to make a scrap of difference in 'sales' - Granted being bitchy in my circle of friends and acquaintances is a whole different story.... The same is true when it comes to Fan Creations (both Art and Storytelling) - the circle is SOOOOOOOO much smaller, and the ripples are so much BIGGER. I made mention that I'd put my pencils down because of one nasty comment - I know of two insanely gifted writers who stopped writing, because someone (or a group of someones) were asses.
At least one of these writers was on the cusp of making the jump from Fan Fiction to Paid Writer. And they stopped because someone harshed their joy...
No. I'm NOT saying 'other people are responsible for our happiness - (keep yer foot outta my mouth, please,) Just perhaps engage in a little more kindness... It's not that hard. *Penises and Religion - Some people have them, and are innately proud of them, but no one wants to have it waved around and shoved in their face unasked...
I do think big fandom fics are a little too easily hated on because they have thousands of kudos or comments people start to think it’s ok to publicly trash them but the authors of those fics are just humans who put out a piece of their soul into the world and are probably also insecure about their writing just like us medium and small authors like i’ve seen big name authors get chased off tumblr or stop writing altogether what i’m saying is stay classy and keep the hate to DMs with your friends
8K notes
·
View notes
Note
Oh! ur gon suck cock now like u dotn have babiyeis don’t liy to me! pway went NOW u hoe! shaken dat ass liek wat! pay wentB stop dukong dick liek its a job! lazy! gwoe up yo bitch!
Kwan Gadomond
Fuckin’ hell?! You think I shake my arse??? You wish kwan. Why would I pay rent? You’re not even my ex or boyfriend?? You write like an incompetent seven year old yark.
0 notes
Note
my vape has been pronounced burnt so instead of hitting it and yarking: gothweebcleats anon here! headcanons time (cw for drug/alcohol talk idk if ur sensitive to that so!! fair warning ahead of time /gen)
the first one to fart in front of the others in the group (all 5 including hermie ofc) was linc. it was an accident and he was deathly embarrassed until taylor’s laugh attack also caused him to fart and then no one could keep it together (even scary. sorry beth)
taylor was the first to be Offered drugs/alcohol but scary was the first one to try weed. she was Exponentially Chiller and if this had been like. height of doodler era the guys wouldn’t have talked abt how they prefer her on weed but they would have all thought abt it (can’t be mean when you’re melting into the couch)
norm likes four lokos. (for those who don’t know: four lokos are 13.9% alc/vol (a lot), have four servings in a can, and have caffeine mixed in) scary likes vodka. taylor drinks rum but likes seltzers. linc doesn’t drink bc drinking is for lame-o’s who aren’t getting a degree in kickology (he’s the designated driver always and we love her for it). hermie is the smoker of the group but has been known to enjoy fancy ales
scary develops a semi-popular poetry blog on tumblr!! taylor and linc help her set it up because they support her and her endeavors and they r so so proud to watch her grow with the validation she receives
scary marlowe had never written love poetry. and then taylor and linc body slammed into her life and now all of a sudden she wants to write about linc and taylor and taylor and linc. she eventually gives them each their own poems (dedicated to them) and a copy of a poem about all three of them (all handwritten, all different) and like. okay. linc and taylor didn’t Really get the poetry thing before (this is their girl how can they not support even when they don’t understand) but now they think they do (they are crying to varying degrees of loudness)
scary and taylor not helping linc rekindle their relationship with his father (bc fuck all dads dad haters club) but instead taking him on fun dates and over to their houses and just. outside and Not with her dads all the time i know linc’s relationship with their fathers is something that has been played off mostly for goofs but they r so. so dependent on their dads it’s a little. worrying (or maybe we all just have different relationships with our parents but as a coddled kid i KNOW what over dependency on ur parents looks like)
all right that’s all for now folks o7 i think this one was mainly for me but!! hoping u find some enjoyment in it aether <3
welcome back gothweebcleats anon ! also ah sorry this took me a minute to respond to - but ahshnenjd all of this is so beloved !! also the boys all agreeing but never actually *saying* they all prefer chill high scary LMAO not gonna make a whole lot of comments on the alcohol hcs bcs . I cannot legally drink and do not plan to and therefore know nothing shjdjdkskd but I will just assume you are very correct abt all of them 😌 anyways , SCARY NOT WRITING LOVE POEMS UNTIL LINC AND TAYLOR AND LINC AND TAYLOT NOT UNDERSTANDING POEMS UNTIL THEY WERE SCARYS LOVE POEMS !!!💥💥!!! SO IMPORTANT TO ME !!! scary writing poems for all of them is literally so cute I love it <333 and Taylor and Scary not trying to get Linc to fix their relationship w her dads !!! helping him figure out how to have her own independence !!!!! takin them on cute little dates !!!! beloved !!!!!!
#gothweebcleats anon#also anon i am finding SO much enjoyment in this <333#I treasure every hc they are all so special and i love them dearly <33333#gothweebcleats
1 note
·
View note
Text
Trophy- Chapter 12
by Yarking Fandom: Dragon Age (general) Summery: Two troubled children meet at the Minrathous Circle. One is a magister’s heir, groomed to be the blood mage general of Seheron, without fear or mercy. Hopefully, that will keep people from noticing how very much an elf he is. The other is last born, least loved and most of his emotions involve academics and cadavers. They love each other, even if they’re not terribly good at it. Warnings for this chapter: references to past trauma (non-graphic) Special thanks beta, Autumn <3 AO3: here
Tertius pointed as the approached the stables, pride bubbling over. "That's her! That's her right there, they turned her out for the day already, it looks like."
Stardust grazed placidly in the open fields, ignoring a bay horse that seemed intent on getting her attention. At Tertius' voice, she raised her delicate head and trotted, the picture of elegance, to where Tertius and Cato stood at the pasture's fencing. As Stardust approached, Cato took a step back, face froggish as Stardust lifted her head over the fence and politely requested Tertius' attention.
"That's a pony?" Cato asked, unsure.
"Well it's not a dragon."
"No, I mean," Cato began, edging closer as he watched Stardust's whiskers tickle over the palm of Tertius' hand. "She's big. She's a pony, so I just... expected her to be smaller. Like those little ponies that pull the half-carts."
"Oh, no, those are Anderfel Mountain Ponies. Yeah, those do stay that small. But I couldn't ride those! Stardust is a Tevene Riding Pony. My mom's family made the breed, special. Aren't they pretty?"
"She sure is a pony," Cato said, evasively. When Tertius turned and frowned at him, hurt, he was pressed to continue. "Horses and ponies and things like that are a little spooky, aren't they? Look at their faces. They're so long. Why are their faces so darn long?"
Tertius snorted at his friend's suspicion. "Stardust is really nice, you don't have to worry about her."
"But she's so big, too! Bigger than me by lots. Bigger than you. You're not worried she'll step on you or anything?"
"She already stepped on me," Tertius said, enjoying Cato's alarm.
"Didn't that hurt?" he asked. He edged away more, putting Tertius between him and the pony.
"Well, yeah. She's a pony so she is pretty heavy, but it was just an accident and I pushed her off right away. It didn't even break my foot or anything; it was just sore for a couple of hours." Tertius looked over his shoulder at where Cato was very nearly cowering. His fear was losing some of its humor, though, and Tertius began to wish they could just get on with each other. "If you're really that scared, you don't have to be here. I can just meet up with you at the library at sundown."
"B-but, you really like Stardust. This is special," Cato argued, inching forward to the pony's soft grey muzzle.
"Yeah, but you don't have to really like her too, you just got to not be mean to her or rude or think she's bad," Tertius assured him. Even as he said it, he felt distantly sad that his two best friends might not get along.
Cato, however, seemed to take this as he often did- as a challenge. He tugged on Tertius' riding shirt and asked, "D'you have any more sugar cubes?"
"No, but there are carrots in the barn if you want to try giving her a treat," Tertius said, lighting up at the prospect. Cato nodded and scampered off, returning after a short while with two carrots, one in each hand while Stardust's eyes shut in peaceful contentment at Tertius' scritching. When she saw the carrots, she lifted her head and took a few slow paces closer to Cato, and when she was not immediately rewarded she gave a small nicker.
"Don't be spoiled," Tertius chided her, petting down her neck as Cato broke the carrot in half.
"So how do I do this?"
"Lay your hand real flat and just put in on your palm and reach out. But you have to keep your fingers flat, or she might accidentally chomp on them trying to get the carrot."
Cato made a distressed noise high in his throat even as he placed the carrot as he was instructed. He reached forward, mumbling, "So, do I tell her to- Oh!"
Stardust gobbled up the carrot without ceremony and nuzzled her velvety muzzle against Cato's palm afterwards, as if thanking him for the gift. Or, more likely for how pampered she was, asking for more.
"Aw, she likes you!" Tertius said, delighted. He knew she would, but it was still nice to be right.
"Did you see that? She just munched it right up, right out of my hand!" Cato crowed, beaming over to Tertius. "I didn't think she'd hork it up like that in one big bite, ha!"
Tertius stomped. "Stardust is a lady pony. She didn't 'hork' anything up. Ponies are just a lot bigger than us, so that was a regular normal bite-size handful of carrot for her."
"Alright, alright. That's fair, I'm sorry."
"Better be," Tertius mumbled, still pouting and sore from the insult to Stardust's honor. To think of her as anything less than a majestic princess!
"Your mom did a really good job breeding her," Cato said, carefully stroking over the soft skin over Stardust's nose. He smiled sheepishly, as if he realized Tertius was not pleased. "She's not nearly as scary as she first looks. She's real sweet."
"My mom didn't breed her, her family did. That was awhile ago. There are lots of Tevene Riding Ponies now; but they're still really special and pretty and good. Everyone wants one just like her, but they can't have her because she's mine!" Tertius asserted, patting Stardust's side. "And we make a really good team! My riding teacher is going to let me jump pretty soon."
"That sounds scary. Is she fast? Do they jump high?"
"Yes and yeah! But I've been riding for a really long time, as long as I can remember, so I'm ready. And Stardust won't let me fall, will you, Dusty?"
Stardust remained silent, her eyes closed in placid relaxation at all the attention and treats. "Did your mom teach you how to ride?" Cato asked.
Tertius smile faltered, twisting slightly bitter. "She did, a little. Before she got sick."
"Aw, sorry 'bout your mom," Cato commiserated, shoulders dropping. "I hope she gets better."
"She died."
"Oh." For some time, the two of them were silent. Cato seemed to sense beyond the wisdom of his years that there was nothing to say to that, no way to make it better, reading the stiff way Tertius braced for empty platitudes or unwelcome sympathy. Wanting to hear none of it. Then, with a lopsided smile, he asked, "Do you want to show me how you ride Stardust? I could run alongside you and see how much faster she is, because I bet she's really fast."
Tertius, heart aching and eyes stinging, managed to smile. "Yeah, I think I'd like that."
--
It took some time for them to get Stardust out to the paddock. Cato was very curious, asking a constant stream of questions about the brush and blanket and saddle and bridle all throughout the process of getting Stardust ready to go out. Tertius was about half sure he was doing it to help keep his mind off his mother, but was grateful. Part of the reason he groomed her and put on her tack himself instead of just letting a slave do it was for the same reason, the other being that he liked spending the time with Stardust, and he liked answering Cato's questions. It made him feel good to be able to answer most of them and hear Cato's impressed hums.
Tertius mounted, checked his stirrups, and pressed his calves into Stardust's side gently. He loosened the reins, asking her forward into her sedated, elegant walk. Cato trailed alongside, giving Stardust a wide berth but loped along at a jog to keep up with her long legs.
"Wait until we get into the field to start running, okay?" Tertius asked. "I don't want you to scare her on accident running too close while we're still near the stables."
"Me? Scare her?" Cato wondered.
Stardust continued serenely, her pale eyelashes fluttering as she blinked. "Uh huh!" Tertius nodded. "Horses and ponies have a lot of animals that want to eat them in the wild, so they get scared really easily. I've heard of horses getting scared for lots of silly reasons, like seeing a leaf they didn't expect, or a bush rustling, or your hat falling off. Stardust is pretty calm most of the time, but I still don't want to make her upset, even if she is really brave."
Cato tilted his head, considering that. "What does a horse do if they're scared?"
"A lot of the time they can start running really, really fast. Faster than I'm allowed to go, and I'd probably fall off and get hurt. Stardust could get hurt too! It's really easy for them to hurt themselves when they go really fast because they're scared."
"So don't scare her on purpose as a joke, got it."
"Cato Fen'Rhea, if you even think about it, I'm gonna-!"
"I said I wouldn't! I don't want you or her to get hurt, that wouldn't be funny," Cato reassured, waving his hand in dismissal. "But if they really do scare that easy, you sure you're gonna be safe?"
"Yeah, I'm pretty good at riding. My teacher wouldn't let me start jumping if I wasn't, because that can be real dangerous too," Tertius explained.
Cato made a grumble of distress. "Okay. If you're sure. You gotta be careful though, because if something happened to my best friend I'd be really upset and angry. I would never, ever forgive Stardust, even if she is really nice and didn't mean to."
"I'll be okay," Tertius promised, privately bursting in joy that his best-best friend would be sad if something happened to him. Cato might be the only one who would.
--
Cato was, predictably, very impressed with Stardust's speed. Tertius only trotted when racing, not really supposed to go faster without someone there to chaperone, and the stablehands were keeping an eye out, but Tertius wasn't sure that counted, since they were just there to tell on him if he did go too fast or do something stupid.
They still had plenty of fun running over the grasses, Cato sprinting on foot and Stardust easily overtaking him until Cato was heaving for breath and ended up lying down, reminding Tertius constantly not to accidentally trample him while he stood with Stardust plenty of paces away.
After that, they ended up playing a game where Cato would sit and call directions, and Tertius would seamlessly follow them with Stardust, to Cato's simple delight.
"How are you doing that even? Is it magic?" he had asked, not being able to tell when Tertius pressed lightly on Stardust's side or noticing when he gently moved the reins. Cato's mystification equally delighted Tertius, amused by how his friend took his skill for wizardry.
Later, when Tertius had brought Stardust over to the pond to drink and take a break, Cato had uprooted one of the long, thin reeds near the pond's edge. He showed it to Tertius proudly.
"You wanna play cavalry?" he asked.
"I don't know how..." Tertius said, tilting his head at the reed. It ended in a little brown bulb- a cattail.
Cato puffed out his chest. "I just made it up! After Stardust is finished drinking, you get on her and try to hit me with the brown thing on this, like you're part of the cavalry and you're trying to stick me with your spear."
"Why do you always want to play games that hurt?" Tertius complained, but took the switch and inspected it further. When Cato made a noise of confusion, Tertius explained further. "When you wanted to play pretend, you wanted to pretend to eat me. You were gonna scare Stardust as a joke, and you want me to hit you with this now. You even joked about sending assassins when we were gonna play chess!"
"Hey, I was gonna send assassins for Sternhalma, not chess," Cato corrected him, but seeing Tertius' scrunched, displeased face, he dropped the teasing. "I... I dunno. I just think it's fun. I've always wrestled with Aun and pretended to spar with sticks and stuff. Tamas says it's good because it teaches me to not be afraid of fighting."
"Because Seheron?" Tertius asked.
"Because Seheron, yeah."
Tertius didn't understand. "You're not going to be able to go to Seheron for ages and ages though. That's years away! Why do you have to start fighting now?"
"Well," Cato mumbled, looking over to the surface of the pond. He folded his knees and sat, looking out as he picked the grass. Nearby, Stardust continued to graze. "Seheron is supposed to be really dangerous and scary. So I have to start now so I have the best shot of coming back, because I'm supposed to be a magister, too. And... it's not like Seheron's the only place I got to fight, anyway."
Tertius sat beside him, knees knocking as he pulled grass alongside him. "Where else do you got to fight?"
Cato looked at him, frowning. "If I was bigger and stronger, I could have maybe fought the apprentices who took me. Maybe I could have at least ran away, or said something back when they said things. Maybe if I was good enough they wouldn't have got me to begin with, maybe they'd be too scared."
"I don't know," Tertius said, skeptically, surprised and afraid now that Cato was talking about what happened. He didn't want to say the wrong thing. But he wasn't sure what the right thing to say would be, so he decided to just be honest. "There were a lot of them, and they were older, too. I don't think you could have scared them off or fought better. They've been at the Circle a long time, haven't they? They probably learned a lot of stuff from the enchanters that we haven't yet, stuff we can't know yet because we're just not as big."
"But I have to be able to do something!" Cato said in dismay. He picked up a rock and lobbed it into the water, watching it hit and sink with a 'plunk'. "There's got to be something I can do, so I can do it if they try to get me again. No one else will. I mean, you'll call for help, which is really nice, but I don't want you trying to fight them and getting hurt because of me."
"You have your knife," Tertius pointed out. He followed Cato's lead, picking out and throwing a rock. It landed short, plopping in the mud near the pond's edge.
"That's true, yeah."
They sat in the long grass for some time, Cato stretching out and soaking up the warm autumn sun and Tertius watching him bask and Stardust munch daintily on grass. After some time, Stardust wandered over to where they sat, her lips nibbling toothlessly at Tertius' ponytail. He scratched the spot on her forehead where her coat whorled, and the direction of the fur went in everywhere, and she gave a cute, blustery snort.
"Did you bring your knife out here?" Tertius asked, the thought just occurring to him.
"Nah," Cato said. He didn't open his eyes.
"Why not? You're not afraid?"
"Apprentices aren't allowed to use magic out here, like in the library. And yeah, they could just catch me and drag me someplace where they can," Cato said, before popping open one eye and giving a mischievous smile. "But first they'd have to catch me. I may not ride as well as you but I'd bet you'd let me ride away if I really needed to."
"I'm pretty sure Stardust could carry us both," Tertius agreed. She was very strong, after all. And, perhaps more to the point, they were very small. "We can try us both riding at the same time right now if you want. Just to practice your escape!"
"Uhh," Cato offered dimly, looking suddenly unsure. "That... er, uh. That's okay. I should really wear my boots when we do, unless it's a real emergency. Since that's how you use the dangly feet things, right?"
Tertius looked down at his friend, suspecting that his footwear wasn't really the issue. "The stirrups. And yeah, but we both can't use the stirrups at the same time anyway, so you can just hold on."
"Well... I mean, don't you think you should be the one who just holds on? You're a better rider than me, after all. That just seems to make sense," Cato reasoned, his voice pitched higher than normal.
"You can just say you're scared," Tertius teased.
"I'm not scared! I just don't want to get hurt, because I've only ever ridden those little cart ponies when I was smaller. And riding on Miss Stardust seems like it would take a... a very advanced rider, seeing how she's so fast, right?"
"You're scared."
"Am not!"
"You aren't even a little?" Tertius weedled. "Because I get scared sometimes when she goes faster than I expected, and I'm a really good rider, so it seems weird that you wouldn't be scared at all, not even a little."
"I'm... a little concerned," Cato said in compromise, eyes shut as he sat up with a dignified jut to his chin. "That there could be an accident. That's not the same as being scared. That's being smart."
"Well, we don't have to try it today. There's always next time." Tertius stood, brushing off the pulled up grass on his lap while Stardust huffed. He paused. "Well, if you want to come back."
"Yeah, this is nice! Even if I don't ride, we can always play games, like earlier. Or I can sit out here and read for the enchanters while you ride around; the willow looks like a really place to read or even just take a nap. I've got so much sleep I need to catch up on."
Tertius looked out past the still pond, trying to judge when the sky would start to go golden. That was when he really needed to bring Stardust in if he wanted to make it back before dark. It was getting late, but he didn't want to stop playing. It was so nice out here. He could hear Cato even better without the voices, and the details of his voice became apparent. Tertius liked it. He liked how it was a little scratchy, and he liked how his friend laughed.
"There's some daylight left. D'you want to try playing 'cavalry?'"
"Huh?" Cato asked, surprised and then delighted. "You want to try it? I didn't think you liked that stuff."
"I do! Just not all the time. Besides, it does kind of sound like it could be fun," Tertius said. It was a little bit of a fib- Tertius thought it still sounded needlessly mean when he could just as soon lean over and tag Cato- but he liked Cato, and he liked Stardust, and he especially liked being able to play with both of them together. Since he enjoyed it so much, he needed to do something to try and get Cato to come back again. Sure Cato said he liked it too, but just to be safe.
Cato leapt to his feet, pinwheeling his arms when the sudden jump made him almost lose his balance. He righted himself and beamed. "Alright! Mount up, commander!"
--
Tertius and Cato walked back to the Circle proper shoulder to shoulder, stopping only for Tertius to wave back at Stardust, who was rolling around in the pasture's dirt, seemingly pleased that her saddle was finally off. He turned back around, and checked Cato playfully.
Their attempts to pretend at being cavalry had failed pretty thoroughly. Whenever Stardust galloped (trotted) at full tilt towards the enemy (Cato, making grunting noises and pretending to have horns), she would always slow down, first to a walk, and then when she was close enough to nuzzle Cato, she stopped altogether, and no amount of kissy noises or flicking the reins would get her to budge forward and trample the nefarious Qunari threat (Cato's words).
That's not to say he didn't end up getting Cato. When he came up to Stardust's side to tell Tertius he didn't think this was going to work after all, Tertius had taken a risk and swatted Cato on his shoulder with the reed. Cato had gave a short, bitten-off scream and leapt back with such drama that Stardust took a few lazy steps away from him. Of course, Tertius panicked, worried that he'd gone too far and that this was it, this was the end. It was nice while it lasted.
Cato just inspected the welt, biting his lip, and after a long beat between the two of them, he gave a breathless laugh.
"Oh yeah, that was a nice one, you got me good!" he said cheerfully, inspecting the thin line of blood that began to bead up from where the long red stripe rose up highest. He poked at it gingerly, hissing and flinching when he pressed too hard.
Tertius hovered, hands pawed over his chest fretfully. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to do it that hard, I didn't think it would-"
"No, no, you did good!" Cato had assured him, before they decided to turn Stardust in for the evening, since she obviously didn't much care for this game. "That just surprised me. My tamas gets me worse when I'm playing where I'm not supposed to."
He had licked his fingers and wiped away the blood, and that was that, motioning for an unsure Tertius to bring Stardust in. Tertius had gathered the reins and lead Stardust behind him, watching the blood bead up again sluggishly from the cut.
"I got assessed for my magic," Tertius confessed as they neared the gate to the Circle's grounds.
"I can cast enough that I get to be in the class with all the other casters next semester."
"Really? That's great! We'll have it together then!"
"You think?"
"There's not enough other apprentices our age to split us all up. Nobody else in my group can cast yet, and I don't think they'll put us in with older kids. I hope they don't, at least," Cato added as an afterthought, his voice lowering with his mood.
Tertius agreed, "Yeah, they probably wouldn't. I just want to do it now. The break takes too long. I don't even want to go home."
"You don't miss your brothers or papa?" Cato asked, sounding genuinely surprised.
Tertius snorted. "My brothers are a lot older, so they're not usually around. Palermo is in the Navy, so he's never home. Hey, you know, you might like him since he's fighting the Qunari actually. Cyprian is working with someone from the circle a little north of Minrathous. I don't really understand what he does, but he only comes home to go with papa to the Magisterium. He was certified by the Circle before I was born, so he's not much fun, not like it sounds like... 'Aun' is. 'Aun', right? Is that his name?"
"His name's Aunny. Well, his name's really Aunnriel, but everyone but Tamas calls him Aunny, and I call him Aun," Cato explained.
"That sounds complicated."
"Your papa?"
"Huh? Oh... n-no, I don't really miss him. He's mostly busy anyway. Being a magister, right? I like reading and drawing and I can do that by myself."
"I guess."
"Honest? I'm glad he's not around a lot," Tertius confessed, throwing himself back to fight the fall winds that pinned the Circle's doors closed. "He's not fun, and he's honestly really scary. Maybe I should be like you and want him to be around more because he's scary, so I'll get better, but I don't think I'm brave like you."
"You think I'm brave?" Cato asked, looking at him with wonder.
"Well, yeah. You're going to go out and fight all the Qunari on Seheron. You said it was really dangerous and you could get hurt, but you're going to do it anyway."
"Yeah but that's ages from now, you said yourself!"
"And you wanted to play cavalry, which mean Stardust was supposed to come running at you-"
"But she didn't."
"But she was supposed to come running at you, and you were afraid of her already."
"Concerned," Cato corrected him, nose turned up. "I was concerned of her. Er, about her."
"Fine then," Tertius finally said, annoyed at Cato's constant rejection. "You're not brave. Happy?"
They reached the library just as Cato puffed his chest out in victory, and then deflated. "No?"
Tertius' laugh was cut off by a withering look from the librarian. He nodded his head in a bow, a silent apology, and ducked down his bookshelf aisle with Cato, waiting until they were certainly out of earshot before whispering again. "What about you?"
Cato shrugged. "I want to see Aun again, sure. I miss playing with him."
Tertius paused, worried that that was an indication that Cato wasn't happy just playing with him. He set the uneasy thought aside and asked, "Your tamas isn't around much either?"
"No, she is. And I do need to ask her about the knife. If she gave me the wrong one or it got enchanted wrong or something. But I'm afraid she's still mad at me for what happened."
"Wait, she's angry at you?"
"Yeah," Cato admitted, his voice cracking as his face crumpled. "I'm supposed to not, uh, not let that stuff happen. It makes my family look bad, and that can be really dangerous. Not just here but in the Senate too. If people think they can hurt me then they might threaten to do stuff to me to make Tamas vote their way or something. And just- it lets people know they can do that stuff, so they'll try it again."
"Oh," Tertius said, dimly. Tertius himself wasn't important enough in his family's hierarchy to worry about, he was pretty sure, but he wondered if this was something Cyprian had to worry about. Perhaps there were downsides to being the house heir. "Sorry. It's not like you wanted it to happen, though."
Cato just shrugged, looking a shade of miserable as they stopped in front of the bookshelf. "Doesn't matter. End's the same."
"I guess. Are you worried about them going after Aunny because of it?" Tertius asked offhand. He didn't notice Cato's reaction immediately as he focused on shifting his heavy bookbag to the ground.
When he didn't get a word either way from Cato, he looked up to check on him and realized his friend was not okay. His eyes were unblinking and looking at nothing, and his breathing was working up like how it had gone funny last time before he suddenly went to sleep.
"Cato?" Tertius asked nervously, not wanting his friend to sleep again. If he did, Tertius would have to pull him in their secret spot himself so he wasn't just lying in the middle of the library, since that sounded dangerous for an elf. That sounded like a lot of work, and they risked someone noticing and finding their spot. He poked his friend on the shoulder experimentally. "You should stop that, I think."
Cato started and looked at Tertius as if he just noticed him there. The little jump he gave in surprise made tears spill over onto his cheeks, and he hastily palmed them away. "Sorry. I was just thinking. I hadn't thought of that but now that you mention it, yeah. I have to figure out how to make sure he's going to be safe."
"Oh. Sorry," Tertius apologized, not wanting to make him worry.
"Naw, it's good that you reminded me. I can start figuring that stuff out now so by the time he's here it'll be okay," Cato assured him, looking the utmost serious and determined with his new plan. "And I think I know where I want to start."
"Yeah?"
"Uh huh. You go ahead. I have someone I gotta talk to, but I'll be back soon, promise."
Tertius squinted at him suspiciously, but nodded and watched as he sprung off like a halla. He hoped he came back soon.
--
Calpernius looked down at Cato with narrowed eyes. "I thought I told you not to-"
"No. I don't want to play this game. This isn't funny. I need to talk to you."
At that, Calpernius reared his head in surprise before cackling. The laugh cut off abruptly, his face falling into flat irritation. When he spoke, his words were sharp, his teeth bare. "I don't think you get it. I'm not joking. I don't give a fuck about you-"
"No," Cato snapped. He stepped forward and, despite only reaching just past Calpernius' waist, matched the boy's vicious face and then some. Cato pointed his finger at Calpernius, jabbing it into his chest with the kind of authority only learned from a lineage of ruling. "You don't get it. This isn't about me. My brother is gonna come to the Circle next year, and I heard that... that the thing that happened to me might happen to him, too."
"My sympathies," Calpernius sneered. His lip curled as he swatted away Cato's finger, but he did not push past Cato like he had feared.
"How do I make it not happen?" Cato demanded.
Calpernius laughed again, this time less false and more helpless. "You can't. What happened to you? Happens to every elf that comes to the Minrathous Circle. Has for years. Happened to me. Happened to every poor fucking rat I've seen here. It's going to happen to you again, until you wise up and transfer to someplace less prestigious, or apply for remote classes."
"We can't do that. We got to go here."
"Then I'm so sorry for your miserable future. Best wishes that you manage not to kill yourself like the last rat that came through here," Calpernius said sarcastically.
"They killed themselves?" Cato asked. Something in him stilled, and his voice trembled- this was new. He didn't... he wasn't prepared for that. "People do that? How many... do that?"
"I don't fucking know," Calpernius grumbled, throwing his hand up. When pressed by Cato's sharp frown, he hissed. "Six- no, seven since I've been here, at least. There's been at a few dozen that's transferred since then, though."
"Seven?"
"Yeah, and it's as likely as not that I'm talking to number eight, so if you'll fuck off-"
"I need to help Aun."
Calpernius groaned, visibly grinding his teeth now in frustration. "This is why butchers don't name their beef cattle."
"Huh?"
"I don't want to know your brother's name! I don't want to know your name, I don't want to be your friend, I don't want to be your little mentor or whatever fantasy is running through your stupid little head. I can't believe I'm even entertaining you right now. You want my advice? Leave the Circle. I don't know why you haven't done that already! There are correspondence classes. I know your mother is a magister, so you could transfer to any other major Circle in the entire Imperium. Fuck, you could probably afford to hire tutors that would give you a better education if you really wanted to."
"I can't leave," Cato insisted.
"Well, then you're an idiot."
"If I'm an idiot for staying and it's so easy to transfer or do any of that other stuff, then why do you stay here, huh?"
Cato hadn't expected the reaction he got. Calpernius' mouth shut instantly and his head reared as if someone had yanked back his reins. Sensing something there, something with give, Cato persisted, his words coming careful as he puzzled them out. "Why are you staying? You don't want to be here, it's not about Minrathous being the best. 'Titus' isn't a magisterial name, so it's not because important magisters always come from the Minrathous Circle. It's not because it's close to the Senate either, so it's not about distance..."
"Rot in the Void," Calpurnius swore, but Cato could tell he was hitting something.
"Is it? If you have to be here- if you have to be in Minrathous... it has to be for some reason."
"Fuck off, this is none of your business."
Cato's voice cracked as he spoke. "I can find out, you know. I can ask my tamas to look you up and-"
"Fine! Fine, whatever you want. Ask away. Whatever the fuck you want to know, and then you leave me alone, right?" Calpernius wagered. The urgency in his voice piqued Cato's interest.
"Well, now I'm kind of curious."
"Do you want my help or not?" Calpernius asked. "I like my privacy; you have your offer. Keep your nose out of other people's fucking business and I'll help."
"I want to know everything."
"Fine."
"All your tricks. You've been here for years and-"
"I said fine! Meet me back here tomorrow, same time. I'll have everything written out for you."
"How do I know you aren't going to send them for me?"
This time, Calpernius recoiled not in fury but... offense? It was a moment before he replied, as if he had to find his words again. "I wouldn't do that," Calpernius said, face set. "Would you?"
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
It’s been a while since I posted up any writings, but here I am with a new story!
This is a short one-shot story I’m calling “Wasn’t Ready”. This was something I was hoping to have released back in May, but needed to keep it on hold until now.
This is based off of and inspired by a scene that @yark-wark had done last month. I found it very fun and interesting, so I wanted to do my own interpretation of that. And I’ve been wanting to try my hand at writing something with Kaz and Zane for a while now.
I hope you enjoy!
--
There was a hiss in the quiet room as the capsule bed finally opened up, a small puff of steam escaping as the air was released and the Gorm inside took a step out. Zane rubbed his head and started to stretch out his stiff body. "Ooooh man, I hate sessions like that." He grumbled quietly to himself, walking over to the wall mounted computer and tapped it, bringing up some information screens.
"Rest Session Log Extensive Repair Needed - Elapsed Time: 1 week, five days, seventeen hours, thirty-eight minutes, eleven seconds."
Zane’s ears twitched as he read that, "Nearly two weeks? It must have been worse than I thought." That thought only lasted a second though as a more immediate thought came to mind. "Geez...I better get in touch with the others quick!"
He stepped out of his room and walked down the hall, taking the elevator that lead to the main operations room where he and the other agents on Swog operated from. According to the time it was around midday, so there weren't too many here, but thankfully Zane did see one of the two he was hoping to see was still here. "Hey Ryner!"
The Glimneon was standing by one of the agent terminals, her antenna twitching as she heard the voice and looked over. "Zane." She said, giving him a nod before going back to her work. "Good to see you up and around again. That must have been one heck of a hit."
"Yeah I guess so." He smiled a little as he stepped over, "Repairs took a lot longer than I expected, did I miss anything?"
"Nothing out of the ordinary." She said, still looking at the screen as she tapped at it a bit. "Command was informed of your condition, so nothing to worry about there. Things have been quiet, so more or less the same."
"Well that's good then." Zane said before he started to look around. "Hey, do you know where I might find Kaz?"
"No idea." She said simply, "He hasn't been around here since the mission."
Zane frowned at that. "Is he okay?"
Ryner let out a small grumble as she closed the screen on the terminal, turning to look over at the Gorm. "I don't know. I don’t like hanging out around him, so I haven't really seen him aside from the odd Muck game.” She paused, “Though I admit, he hasn't been his annoying self during those matches."
Zane was starting to worry more when he heard that. "That doesn't sound like him..." He sighed and he rubbed his head, "Okay, well thanks. I'm gonna head out and see if I can find him."
"Don't you want to report in first?"
"I can wait and do that later." He said, turning and rushing out. He had been gone this long, a little extra time wouldn’t hurt.
--
This wasn't like Kaz at all. He wasn't at home, he wasn't answering his comm, he wasn't at the ice cream shop or hanging out at any of the Muck Warfare shops or playing fields. Where was he?
Zane was getting a little worried, the teenage Needlix was a lot easier to get a hold of than this, but he wasn't out of ideas just yet. Kaz did like exploring around in some of the more rural areas, walking through the mushroom forests or nearby the slime ponds. Maybe he was somewhere around there!
He hurried along the roads, moving out of the residential area and into the more rural areas, walking along a familiar path: the two friends usually traveled along to and from some of the Muck Warfare playing fields. Kaz really enjoyed the scenery and he had a few spots that he hung out at. Maybe he was hiding out here? That's what he was hoping...
Zane hurried along the path, looking around and keeping an eye out through the trees and low-hanging plants, "Where are you?" He asked himself, but then he stopped himself, catching sight of a very familiar purple coat in a clearing not far from the path. It was him! He was just standing around by himself, slightly slumped and holding his slime mace over his shoulder. The Gorm felt an immediate sense of relief as he started to head over to him. "Kaz! Hey Kaz!" He called over to him.
Kaz seemed to twitch when he heard the voice, standing up straight and turning his head slightly.
"Hey Kaz!" Zane said cheerfully, giving him a smile. "I've been looking everywhere for you! I know it's been a while, but I wanted to-" He had been expecting a different kind of reaction from his friend than the one that he got. It came rather suddenly and Zane had to dodge backward as the slime mace came slamming down, crashing down where he had been moments ago with a heavy thud and a splat of purple slime exploding out. "Wait...what?" He looked at his friend with a concerned look, but that was returned with a hard glare.
"YOU BRAINDEAD PIECE OF CRAP!" The teenager screamed out, "Why did you come back?!" His voice was shaking and filled with anger, but Zane could see the turmoil on his face as tears filled his eyes and his whole form was shaking.
"Kaz, I-" Zane tried to explain, but he had to step back again as he was met with another swing from the mace. This time though he could see that Kaz was clearly swinging it through the air in anger and frustration.
"Those scars! T-those scars you got!" He yelled out again, speaking between his wild swings. "It was because of m-me! B-because of me!"
Zane didn't say anything. He hadn't looked for any scarring on his body when he woke up, but he knew that there was going to be some.
Kaz made one last huge swing with the mace, slamming it down on the ground and sending more purple slime out. "Y-you! You shouldn't have come back!" Finally, he dropped the mace before he fell down to his knees, shaking a little as he let out a few quiet sobs. "...I wasn't ready...I wasn't ready for that job..."
When everything seemed to have calmed down, the Gorm stepped over, kneeling down next to him. "Kaz, listen to me." He said, keeping his voice calm for him. "I warned you that these jobs were going to be dangerous, but don't you go and blame yourself like this. There is a lot of risk that comes with this, and everyone knows it. Even me."
The teen shook his head before he looked up at the gator dog, still crying. "B-but it's my fault you got hurt-"
Zane shook his head, "The same thing would have happened if anyone else was in your place. Remember Kaz; you're my friend, and I protect all of my friends no matter what." He gave him a smile, "Besides, it's going to take a lot more than that to take down this Gorm."
Kaz sat there quietly, wiping his eyes and nose off on his coat sleeve. "I wasn’t ready. I wanna get better. Get stronger."
"And you will." Zane said, reassuring your friend, "Just give yourself the time and you'll get better." He rested a hand on his shoulder. "C'mon, let's get back into town. I've been gone for nearly two weeks and I'd rather be up and doing something. I just know I’m gonna be rusty the next time we decide to go Mucking."
The Needlix sniffed a little before he nodded, getting up to his feet slowly. "I'm...s-sorry about...trying to whack you with Macey."
"Don't worry about it." Zane said, smiling at him, "I know it must have been hard after all that time, I’d probably be just as frustrated."
Kaz picked up his slime mace, holding it in his hands before he stored it away back into his PD device. "Hey...Zane..."
He looked down at him, "Yeah?"
"I'm...I'm g-glad you came back."
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
Techno did some more lore discussion in Discord! (Read Bottom to Top)
[Image ID:
4 cropped screenshots of Discord messages by Techno. They read as follows:
In reply to fishinnit.png saying “on the topic of c!techno someone (i wont say who + if you know them dont attack this is for the sake of discussion) compared his mindset of exploding lmanberg to exploding a car because he wanted a parking spot and its just not clicking for me”, Techno said “listen. the car tried to run me over”
In reply to Yarking saying “But fr, I was thinking about fandom perception of techno and it's really just suffering from success. If you don't watch his pov, you only see the W and not the stress and thought that went into it”, Techno said “ye i've seen a lot of takes along the lines of "c!techno literally never has anything bad happen to him, this writing is terrible" which imo shows that they haven't been watching my character's POV/forgot most of it and only understand it through the lens of someone else's POV. though i can hardly blame them since watching a full POV takes like 50 hours and much of the lore was so long ago that even I'm starting to forget it; perhaps it'd be good to make a Lore Recap video of some kind”.
Techno: ppl see doomsday as proof that my character can solo the entire server and then apply that to every situation. my view is more: "my character spent weeks preparing and then brought ~50 withers, 200 wolves, tricks like invis pots/levitation potions to stall and confuse, allied with phil and dream (one of the strongest guys in the lore). and still almost got killed by sapnap a lot of preparation went into making this all possible; a good comparison to look at would be the prison break, where after watching my disciple and good friend get murdered in front of me i manage to kill zero people because i didnt have the tools to fight that many people (lack of inventory space meant i couldnt bring the Big Guns to the prison break because i needed to bring MILK)”.
Techno: “that and i think fundy stole all of lmanburgs combat items like one hour before the fight for some reason”.
In reply to bloprime saying “i think hbomb also switched sides towards the end and started dropping tnt??”, Techno said “that's why they call him hBOMB”.
In reply to Corn1fer saying “You did that joke 12 months ago smh /lh”, Techno said “why come up with new jokes when you've already achieved the peak of comedy”.
End ID]
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Hey! You! Person soaking in the rain! Yes, you! What on earth are you doing just standing out there?
You don't know? Then come inside my shop and get out of the rain, you poor dear. You look soaked to the bone. Come, sit down, I'll get you some tea and a blanket to help you warm up. Hm? Oh, yes, of course you can look around. Most of the items around are for sale, if your interested.
Anything catch your eye? Oh? The tea cups walking around? Yes, they're for sale, though I'd recommend buying their tea pot as well, or they'd get quite lonely.
Oh, and that egg potion? Oh yes, it's such a little darling, though I'm not sure what it's effects are meant to be. All I remember is that it replenishes itself, so you don't have to worry about hurting it if you do try drinking some of it's potion.
Ah, and the Yarks Varen Post card? Hmm? Writing? What writing?
Is there anything else you'd like to know more about? Let you think about it? Of course. Enjoy your tea in the meanwhile, dear.
33 notes
·
View notes
Text
some fun news
this year’s depaul pop culture conference is themed around sherlock holmes and i’m going to be one of the people presenting!!!!!!
i’m so excited i might yark on the rug but anyway. the subject of my paper is going to be about the line between fan and expert/scholar within sherlock holmes studies and the hierarchy therein. i’m probably going to talk about meta writing and maybe put william s baring-gould on blast, who knows! but i hope i will do our little hovel justice<3
also arwel is gonna be there. so there is that.
#i will be very normal about it i promise#but holy shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im so excited#now to go from outline and bib phase to draft phase. pray for me#btw this paper isnt going to be A TJLC ESSAY there are enough of those from weirdo outsiders and i dont intend to invite more scrutiny lol.#but i am gonna talk about the level of fan engagement in communities like ours rises to compare to ~experts~ and sherlockian scholars#and question why there is a value judgement made on one versus the other#WSBG's sherlock holmes biography is as much a fannish work of imagination as anything else right#with the nero wolfe thing and all. come on#but why is that a bad thing and why cant we be honest about it!#a treatise against fandom cringe sort of but not really#more like a treatise about media studies and fandom and why when old white dudes do it it's scholarship and societies#and when young ppl/women/lgbt people do it it's fan clubs and obsession and cult behavior lol.#there is a meaningful difference between scholarship and casual enjoyment but like when youve written 100s of pages of meta doesnt that#line blur considerably? i think it does#sorry these tags are unwieldy my god
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
writing while distracted is fun because sometimes you get a really creative line out of your subconscious thoughts and other times you get "The Dark Yark"
3 notes
·
View notes
Photo
100 Days of Writing: Day 16 (16th June)
Do you have prophecies and superstitions as part of the worldbuilding in your WIP? Could you add some?
Actually yes, for this question: in a previous Fabulous Killjoys fic I came up with the concept of a cult that’s in some ways prophetic, and although originally I didn’t intend to bring it into this fic I ended up doing so, because my characters needed a helping hand to find their new motivation. So we’re visiting the Mission again, out on the edge of the Zones:
The Mission: half ritual, half rave, and not the kind of place you go for fun. Word of it’s never got to the City – it’s a zonerunner thing, and even in Zones 1 and 2 it’s not much more than a rumor, a story about a place out on the very edge of things that might or might not be true. But the longer you stay out in the desert the more it creeps into your head, slow over time, until one night you come drifting out to where the zones bleed into the glowing wastes, and find the Mission awake and waiting. The squat adobe building is painted in swirling crazy neons, its tower fractured and empty, and the stones in the graveyard that surrounds jut like broken teeth. Day and night its roof is black with crows, yarking constantly as they flap and circle, but when it surges into life the lights and noise drive the birds away and the only two crows are the Twins.
Tonight Crow Kurt is at the gate, ash-haired and sickly-looking behind a rough board table, dipping out a cup of pulque for each seeker from the metal vat. The drink’s the entry fee, pale and frothy with an unhealthy sheen on its surface, as though Crow Miranda has whispered down one of their birds and dipped the oil from its feathers into a shining skim. Best not to ask what it’s brewed from, like it’s best not to look too closely at the white bones scattered among the tipped-over gravestones: if some kid ends up with a head full of black feathers, beak pecking away from the inside, and wanders too far to come home, well, Kurt and Miranda aren’t anyone’s friends.
@the-wip-project
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
(Um...This is...a rather sad post, for me and many others affected. Please feel free to skip it if you may feel overwhelmed.)
This month, an admirable artist of mine passed away.
Just this afternoon, when I was on Twitter, I learnt of the news of her passing from another artist I follow.
I am not an artist, and will probably never be one. Aesthetic of visual arts is never my talent. I have learnt this shortcoming of mine since I was little.
Therefore, I respect people with a gift in drawing a lot. I may be able to convey a message through words, but more often than not, a single piece of artwork speaks much more than a passage or a story.
I have followed the artist since I was in early secondary school, from Deviant Art before to Twitter now. What attracted me is what was also her best-known work: A webcomic in progress.
She pitched the idea of it long before I had got to know her, and I have since waited for the realisation of this aspiration of hers: A sci-fic story involving a team of four. I remember having a blast just looking at the designs, reading the biographies of the protagonists and that one charming antagonist. Her unique, wacky art style combined with a creative mind always made me happy, excited for what masterpiece she might have next. I anticipated her dream coming-true, and I know I was not the only one.
She was quite popular among artists, as well. I remember seeing other talented people drawing those characters of her, asking her about her project and giving their support and appreciation. I recall her being especially good friends with a certain artist. They always drew one another’s characters in their own art style, like a gift exchange among artists, a mutual encouragement between dream-chasers.
But me and her? It was a strange bond.
She didn’t know me. I barely knew her. I was extremely shy at that time. I didn’t comment on her artwork. I didn’t even leave a like. Of course she wouldn’t know me.
Living in two places separated by land and water, there’s no way we would had seen each other in real life. Except if a chance encounter had happened during our travels, unbeknownst to both of us.
But it was a connection across space. A string held together by a common interest. She might not know it, but her artwork once brought many joyful moments to an anonymous stranger. She would not know it, but an anonymous stranger once sent her his silent support and gratitude.
She did not know it, but her passion and talent made a certain childhood more colourful.
I have no right to be sad. A lot of people are much more affected than me, people who have been with her the entire time. I had left for a few years, and when I saw the news, it is already time to bid farewell.
A dream to be continued, but a sweet dream nonetheless. The journey might not be completed, but how grateful I am for what it had given me.
It is too late even for a parting gift, but please allow me to send this gift to somewhere without an address.
Thank you, Yark.
———————————————————————
ふっ切るはずの心に そっと横切る風は優しく
向かい合って握った手と手を いつもの黄昏が包み 溶かしてゆく
おかしいね これぽっちも貴方と私の微笑 今では
鏡を見てるような気分
The breeze gently passes through the air, blowing towards the heart that should have been broken.
Enveloping those crossed, held hands in the everyday dusk, slowly disappearing.
Strange, isn’t it? Our smile never looked the same.
But now, it seems like I am looking at my own reflection.
悲しまない 平気だからね
何気ない挨拶に隠れてる "ありがとう"
さよならbyebye 元気でいてね
私から切り出したけじめだから キャッチしてよ
I won’t be sad. Because it’s nothing.
Hidden under those nonchalant greetings is my “thank you”.
Farewell. Bye bye. Please do take care.
Because this is a request I proposed first, please firmly catch it.
ついさっきまで まともに 未来のこと話せないでいた
実らない想いの数 増えるほど 優しくなってきたけれど
今では 少しくらいは とがりたくて・・・
Not long ago, we never talked about the future.
Although I am getting gentler, as wishes that cannot be granted accumulate.
But now, for only a bit, please let me throw a little tantrum...
悲しまない そろそろ行くよ
他愛ない挨拶と間違えて 振り返る
さよならbyebye 元気でいてね
年に二枚くらいの葉書なら キャッチするよ
I won’t be sad. It’s time for you to go.
Contradicting my cold salutations, I turned around.
Farewell. Bye bye. Please do take care.
If you write me a postcard or two every year, I will surely catch it tightly.
きっといつか いつか会える
いいよ 返さなくていいよ CDも ブルースハープも
Someday, I am sure we will meet again...
(It’s alright if you keep it. Whether it is the CD, or the harmonica...)
悲しまない 悲しまないで
不意打ちを食らう顔 見せないで ピっとしなよ
さよならbyebye 元気でいてね
おめでとうと どちらか言えるとき 会ってみたい
I won’t be sad. Please don’t be sad as well.
Don’t let me see that devastated expression, and cheer up.
Farewell. Bye bye. Please do take care.
I hope that when we congratulate each other, we can meet again.
悲しまない 平気だからね
何気ない挨拶に隠れてる "ありがとう"
さよならbyebye 元気でいてね
私から切り出したけじめだから キャッチしてよ
I won’t be sad. Because it’s nothing.
Hidden under those nonchalant greetings is my “thank you”.
Farewell. Bye bye. Please do take care.
Because this is a request I proposed first, please firmly catch it.
さよならbyebye 元気でいてね
年に二枚くらいの葉書なら キャッチするよ
さよならbyebye 元気でいてね
私から切り出したけじめだから キャッチしてよ
Farewell. Bye bye. Please do take care.
If you write me a postcard or two every year, I will surely catch it tightly.
Farewell. Bye bye. Please do take care.
Because this is a request I proposed first, please firmly catch it.
——— 馬渡松子 ≪さよならbyebye≫
Mawatari Matsuko “Farewell, Bye Bye”
(25-10-2020)
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
In honor of the canonical birthday for Yark's main villain for Team Prototype - Ezskar (Dec 24), I had drawn the traditional sketch yesterday of my character Nido being briefed on a future project of Ezskar's. And I also felt compelled to write a lil something to accompany the picture, which turned out to go way, WAY further than I had intended. So enjoy this currently untitled brainspew.
Oh... And the digital sketch came way before the pencil sketch that was originally an attempt to work on a grumpy expression... which then became a full body sketch that required full made up context for the annoyed expression. And now it's sorta woven into this crack story that I finished some minutes ago before the 24th ends.
Again... Enjoy the madness below!
____(Start)_____
*Phew-!*
A needlix exhales in relief as he pulls himself up off the floor from beneath a block of pipes, gears and wires galore. Now on his feet, his arms sit akimbo as he assesses his handiwork - a cantankerous engine had landed itself in his corner of the station two days ago, and rightly so with the mileage on Techkanis-9 it had tallied up for well over a decade. Satisfied, he steps up on the front bumper and grabs the hood to lock it down in place.
"Well... I think that's about as much as ya need from me this mornin, eh clunker?" he grins, punctuating with a couple knocks on the hood. "S'bout time you retired, but your owners... Well they're bout as stubborn as I am" he chuckles.
Taking a moment to straighten a slouch and undoing stiffness in his neck with a crunch that'd make a chiropractor blush, he stares up at the clock above his workbench. 11:17.
"Ah... Good timin'" he mused aloud.
Lunchtime! Scanning his workspace, he stoops down to pick up the rest of his tools and proceeds to wipe them down with a towel and put them in their place one by one. He was buffing a wrench when a familiar rhythm came through the garage door.
*Tok Tok t-Tok tok*
His eyebrows sunk, while his pupils came up to meet them in a bonafide scowl. If the wall he was staring at had wallpaper, it'd peel.
"Ah... Good timin'" he repeats coated with equal parts annoyance and resignation.
A nostril whistles as he takes a deep breath and a louder knock returns to fill in that gap of silence.
"Yeah I'll be right there. Gimme a moment," he announces plainly exercising restraint on his grumpiness as he tosses a dirtied rag onto the bench and makes his way to the garage door panel.
A magnetic key hangs attached to the controls as he thumbs the button to raise the sliding door and up it rises with a hum.
Slowly the brighter light of the hall begins to flood in from beneath the metal curtain, and a shadow starts to print onto the workshop floor. Just as the door clears 3 feet, a bulbous, spiky silhouette streaks in from underneath and launches at the needlix - maw open and *hungry*!
"Wha-!" the needlix barely gets out through clenched teeth before his arms reach out to grapple the chitinous assailant as his weight rocked back onto his tail - his legs losing purchase of the floor. His left shoulder and head checked against the wall, his spiny headset dislodged askew.
Eyes wide in shock at all that had transpired in a blink of an eye, the needlix's mind sprinted to catch up with the situation after a few ragged breaths. Familiar gurgling noises arose from the form wriggling in his stranglehold.
"...h-hey, Chompski..." he manages to sputter as he frees one arm to realign his headset.
"rrrRrRRRrRghh~"
"Yeah? Can y'not though?" he pleads with nervous laughter while patting the overgrown mutant clam.
The semi-sentient appendage seems to click apologetically as it begins to withdraw in a rising motion allowing the needlix's boots to reunite with the floor.
With Chompski clearing his line of sight, it unveils a grinning silhouette half-ducked underneath the partially open entry, the emerald green glow of a synthetic swirl-eyed lense making for an easy focal point of attention. Unnervingly so.
"Ezskar," the needlix flatly addressed the imp of an employer.
"As expected of a pro muck warfare player! Impeccable reflexes, Nido!" the shadow sung through his smile as he gave a polite golf clap. "I'd apologize about the 'forced entry' but IT decided to wake up as I got close. I'd blame the fact that it positively reeks of productivity in here. And by productivity, I mean stale coffee" he snickers, gesturing with a hand as if he was whiffing a fine fragrance.
"RrrRrwryyyeargh!" vocalized Chompski as it wriggled in seeming agreement, before all of a sudden it froze in place - its eyeless gaze staring at Nido's right side.
Both Ezskar and Nido pause in anxious silence and in unison traced the line to Nido's right hand, still clutching a newly buffed wrench despite the short altercation.
Marveling at that detail, Nido absentmindedly brings the wrench in front of him to stare at it in disbelief, which Chompski follows with uncanny, locked-on precision. Nido now noticing this, starts slowly waving the wrench around. Still entranced.
Nido blinks, and looks to Ezskar who returns the gaze with a furrowed brow. Nido's tail tip begins to sway, a wicked grin steadily twists onto his cheeks showing rows of sharp crooked teeth, as his eyebrows near float up to the ceiling with diabolical delight.
"N-Ni... Don't you dare," Ezskar's composure flounders. "If you like your pay, you better stay as smart as you usually are" he threatens all the while tugging on his prodigal tether to wrestle it back under his control.
Nido takes another deep breath through what was probably the smuggest his face ever contorted in his lifetime as the metaphorical devil horns receded back into his skull.
"Hahhhh... I guess I do like my pay," he smirks as he tucks his right hand behind his back. "Well? What can I do for ya, Ezskar?"
Ezskar let's go of his tail as he straightens his attire and sweeps back his hair. "Ehem... The new project. The one I left a voicemail about this morning?"
"This morning?" Nido scratches his head as he gazes up at the ceiling for his memories. He ruminates for a moment before realizing he could just check his cell logs. Pulling the unit from his vest, he finds a call from Ezskar... At 3:49AM.
"...Ah. This morning," Nido mutters as he vaguely remembers being interrupted during his morning ritual of downing multiple pots of coffee to function for the rest of the day.
"I missed it. Sorry bout that."
"I'll let it slide," Ezskar dismisses with a wave of his arm producing a tablet in hand which he begins fanning himself with. He strolls up to the inner garage door control panel and restarts opening the door.
"I'm here with a lot more details about it all since I left the message anyway..."
Ezskar turns on the makeshift fan, and takes a moment to peruse the screen, before tossing it at Nido.
"Alleyoop!"
Nido catches it with his left hand and begins taking a look.
Ezskar chuckles as he starts heading out the now gaping garage entrance. "There's a lot to discuss, so let's walk n talk to the mess hall, hmm? It is lunchtime afterall."
Nido doesn't answer but absentmindedly follows Ezskar out. Pulling his inner garage panel key out with his teeth and deftly dropping it into an open vest pocket, he lumbers out into the hall hunched over the plans, his eyes already taking in and considering the logistics of a new large scale multi-layered containment field with lots of bells and whistles. His body on autopilot, he fumbles with his wrench toting right hand to get the garage door closed while he's already planning on how to approach and lead this new project.
"And you want this done... In a month? I may 'reek of productivity,' Ezskar, but I think you've whiffed those fumes too deeply," Nido states with skepticism plastered on his grizzly mug - his lower jaw waggling as if he was discreetly cleaning his teeth.
"I'm willing to haggle, Nido. I got big plans. BIIIG plans! And you're going to help me. That I can assure you..." Ezskar smirked tossing quick glance back before facing forward again. "And...! I'll be sure to pay you very, very well!" Ezskar rubs his fingers together signing the many dollar signs of to be expected.
Nido's chin waggles again for a few moments before he speaks again.
"So you're gonna pay me very well for this new containment project, huh? How much are we talkin?" he says in a very probing manner.
"Hmmmm... I think maybe even triple your current pay? ...yes, triple. If you do as good a job I expect you to do," Ezskar muses aloud.
Nido snorts a bit. "Triple my pay you say?" he inquires louder.
At this point, the two are just now reaching the entrance to the mess hall as Ezskar turns around to address Nido.
"Triple guaranteed! So long as you make this project run on schedule" Ezskar states as he holds a suction-cupped hand out. "Deal?"
Nido locks eyes with Ezskar for a moment as he hands over the tablet into the open palm, but not letting go of the unit.
"Deal," Nido says with an overly warm, beaming smile.
An inexplicable chill runs down Ezskar's spine about that answer. "Wonderful," he utters cautiously. "You can let go of the tablet now, Nido."
"Oh! I will, but before I do..."
Ezskar's brow furrows as he reiterates what was said, "Before you do...?"
Nido's grin grows wider - reminiscent of a grin Ezskar saw back at the workshop. Nido leans closer to Ezskar's height looking past Ezskar's right shoulder.
Ezskar for a moment is about to push the question stepping back to look at Nido's face when his eyes catch a gleam past Nido's leaning right shoulder.
Behind his back... a wrench waves threateningly and Ezskar's eyes widen in sheer terror.
"N-no. NO. NIDO DON'T Y--"
"Chompskiii!" Nido calls as he let's go of the tablet and winds up for a pitch...
Chompski at full attention locks-on already yanking Ezskar around at the wild flailing motions...
"NIDO. NIDO STOP. I WILL F..."
"FETCH!!!" Nido bellows with a wild look in his eye
And in a blur, Nido's right hand is empty while a flash of pink streaks into the mess hall as a commotion erupts.
For a moment, Nido takes in the chaos that has begun past the swinging doors, before giving a satisfied huff as he starts strolling back to his workshop, blueprints and schematics in mind.
"Down payment received! The month starts now!"
---(END)----
Now... Barring the smiling betrayal at the mess hall which all started because the wrench and Chompski wanted to stay relevant for story continuity sake, I feel like I'm satisfied with the characterization I've got goin for Nido. I'm also wondering if this version of Ezskar that my brain produced feels on brand with him being a proper villain.
Bless his mutant, quasisentient tail!
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
Trophy- Chapter 11
by Yarking Fandom: Dragon Age (general) Summery: Two troubled children meet at the Minrathous Circle. One is a magister’s heir, groomed to be the blood mage general of Seheron, without fear or mercy. Hopefully, that will keep people from noticing how very much an elf he is. The other is last born, least loved and most of his emotions involve academics and cadavers. They love each other, even if they’re not terribly good at it. Warnings for this chapter: references to past trauma (non-graphic) Special thanks beta, Autumn <3 AO3: here
It lasted.
Tertius hadn't really expected it to. Even when Cato woke up that morning, blinking away the sleep and looked up only to see Tertius looking down at him since he noticed the other boy's stirring, Cato had only had to think for a moment before tilting his head and smiling a sleepy, grateful smile.
"I didn't wake up!" he said, as if all of it was normal, as if he didn't regret falling asleep on Tertius' leg.
Cato's muzzy delight was infectious. "Did you have any bad dreams?" Tertius asked. "You were sorta twitching there for a bit and I didn't know if I should wake you up or not. You were really sleepy last night."
"I did, but it wasn't as bad as normal. I hadn't really slept in a while. The healer gave me stuff to drink so I would go to sleep, but I've been pouring it out," Cato explained, sitting up and stretching. He yawned, tongue sticking out as he did so.
Tertius stretched as well, toes splaying as he stretched out the leg that had been trapped under Cato all night. "Why come?"
"It makes it hard to wake me up. If someone comes and gets me I don't want to sleep through all the chances I got to stick 'em and get away. But I can start drinking it now," Cato said, surprisingly cheerful for just waking up. "Uh, I mean. If you wanna keep staying here at night, with me."
The stipulation had been sheepish, as if Cato wasn't sure Tertius would want to make last night's arrangement a habit. Which was absurd. Other than his leg being asleep itself, Tertius had been riding the giddy delight of his new friendship all night, only having to glance down at the smooshed and drooling face of his new best-best friend to confirm that it was real. If anything, it was Tertius that had more than half expected Cato to dismiss him when he woke, now that there was no bedsheet evidence to-
"Oh!" Tertius said, standing in the cramped space. He ignored the prickles in his still-asleep leg. "We gotta put sheets on your bed before everyone wakes up, or they'll get suspicious."
Cato recoiled. "But I don't have any sheets. The ones we sent to the laundry last night won't be done yet."
"That's okay. I have bed stuff that I brought from home, so you can have my Circle sheets and I'll just change mine. Come on!"
Tertius shimmied through the shelf, helping Cato through behind him, and they quickly returned the books they had dislodged to slip through before tromping off to the dorms. The light pattering the hall floors from the tall line of windows let through the pale pink light of morning, dusty but not yet bright. The first of the morning birdsongs began as Tertius slipped into his dorm room, motioning Cato to follow behind.
They stripped the bed as quietly as they could, the mumble of sleepy apprentices around them making them both jump and fear being discovered, but soon enough Cato had a bundle of linens all tucked up in his arms.
"Go ahead and put these on, I'll do my own, so we both don't get caught out," Tertius whispered, drawing up close so Cato could hear without waking the whole room.
Cato nodded seriously, and snuck swiftly to the door as Tertius pulled out the bedding where it was folded under his-
Tertius stared down at the yellow blanket in his hand, still for just a moment while he remembered.
Then, quick and wordless, he ran out to the hall between their dorms, catching Cato trying to open the door with his full hands just in time.
"Psst!" Tertius hissed, and Cato stopped and jumped, twisting to see Tertius, and gave a silent, mimed sigh.
"What?" he said in a stage whisper.
Tertius closed the distance between them and draped the half-folded blanket over Cato's shoulders. "My bedding is really puffy so I don't get cold. You can have this."
"Really?" Cato asked, delight lighting up his face. If Tertius wasn't sure of his decision before, he was now. "It's so fuzzy, I love it!"
"Right? But I gotta go. I'll meet you tonight at the library? A few minutes after lights out."
Cato's face flashed with something Tertius couldn't exactly place, but he liked it. Cato nodded and nuzzled against the fuzzy edge of the blanket. "Thank you."
Tertius beamed as Cato slipped into his dorms, feeling giddy and light and like he wanted to skip. He couldn't wait to tell Stardust about this.
--
Cato flopped onto his bed after history class belly-first, nuzzling and rubbing his face against the fuzzy yellow blanket like a cat scenting his favorite person. His books and papers scattered at his bedside, assignments already done in class while some of the other students had asked questions and needed help. His tutors had already taught him the basics of the Senate and how it came to be. It was, after all, his birthright, and he was expected to know all that plenty better than the students who it wouldn't really matter to. Cato was proud of his role, and excited to do well and make his family proud.
The longer he stayed in the Circle, the more he felt a stubborn pride in representing not just his district, but elves as well. Cato had a sneaking suspicion that the Circle's attendance was a good way to judge how many elves would be working alongside him in the Senate, and- he considered with a shudder- how some of the other magisters might feel about him being there at all, even if it was his right.
Cato pet the fuzzy blanket stretched across his bed. This he hadn't expected. The Danarius boy was strange, certainly. But nice. More nice than Cato had expected. More nice than he even knew what to do with. The gift and promise of meeting again tonight had struck at Cato's already weathered wariness, eroded with exhaustion and gratitude for what he had already done for him, both calling the dorm master and finding him a safe den to hole up in should trouble arise.
He would be able to sleep. How trying it had been to stay awake hadn't really occured to Cato until he no longer had to resist it. He would be safe, and because of that, he could sleep, and be healthier, and stronger and then even more safe. All because of the human.
Cato wasn't sure what to make of Danarius being so helpful, despite his humanity. Perhaps some were good.
If so, Cato didn't much care. Enough of them weren't. Enough of them took him in the middle of the night. His mother's warnings were fresh in his mind, and Cato slipped his knife under his pillow where he hid it when he was in bed and reading. It was daytime. He was safe. They wouldn't be that reckless.
All the quiet reassurance in the world didn't fade his fear as much as the promise of the library.
--
When Cato met the Danarius boy at the library the night, he brought his bookbag, overflowing with necessities and goodies and treats.
"Dan!" Cato whispered, hopping when he saw the other boy lingering shadily in the aisle of their secret cubby hole's entrance.
Dan turned to him, cocking his head and looking perplexed. "'Dan'?"
"Yeah, cos you're a Danarius, but the whole thing sounds stuffy and too much and you're my friend. So. 'Dan'."
"You know my name's Tertius, right? You remember?" he asked.
"Yeah, but most humans from important houses go by their house name, and 'number three' feels... I don't know. Rude, or strange. Both. Do you not like it?"
Dan beamed as he lowered himself to the floor and pulled out the books hiding the cubby. "No, it's nice! I just never had a nickname before. Especially not one with my family, since I'm not heir. Oh, do you want me to start calling you Fen'Rhea? Or maybe just Fen? I really like 'Cato' to be honest, that's what I've been calling you in my head." For a moment, Dan blustered, cheeks going pink as if he had mispoke somehow. "I mean, when I told Stardust about you."
"Naw, 'Cato' is fine, I don't need a fancy name. Tamas calls me and Aun 'fenris', sometimes. She said her tamas called her that and her tamas' tamas called her tamas that and... you get me. 'Fenris' means 'little wolf', so it's for all the badger-wolf kids," Cato explained, eager that Dan seemed as excited to learn about his family as Cato was to share. He can't imagine any of the other apprentices humoring him so much without making fun of his elvhen ancestry. "Tamas also said soldiers can earn a nickname when they do something out on Seheron. So I'll just wait for then. Those names aren't always nice, but they 'build character' and that's supposed to be good."
"'Fenris'," Dan repeated, considering it as if he was trying to decide if he liked how it tasted on his tongue. He slipped, legs-first this time, into the den. "That's a pretty name."
"Who's Stardust?" Cato asked, poking his head through after Dan and getting a faceful of his robes. He batted the robes away and waited for Dan to crawl up on the cushions before sliding in himself, dragging the book bag behind him.
"Oh! I never said, did I?" Dan said cheerily, knocking his heel on the paneling as Cato got comfortable. He continued, eyes shut and a delightfully smug grin on his face. "Stardust is my pony."
"What? You have your own pony? Wha-, that's so great, why did you get a pony!?" Cato gasped, happy for his friend, even if he was a little envious. He's not quite sure what a kid his age did with a pony. Could Dan ride it? Oh, but they're so small, the image was funny to even think about!
"Stardust is the best and most beautiful pony there is. My papa got her for me, and she's so nice and sweet, and she kisses me and she really loves sugar, and- oh! Oh, can I show you to her tomorrow? I visit her every day between classes and naps."
Cato grinned. He wasn't entirely convinced the pony even existed with how Dan bragged of her, so he was willing to call the potential bluff. And if it turned out Stardust was real and not "invisible" or "at home" like some of the other apprentices might try to pull, then at least he got to see a pony. "Sure thing! I know your group does different things than mine, since we aren't ever in the same class, but we have time after lunch when we can play or take naps. I'm never tired at naptime, so we can go then if you want to."
"She'll love you, I know," Dan said, very serious.
Cato climbed up onto the cubby's cushions and pulled his bag between the two of them. "I bought some things," Cato explained, dumping out his bag and picking out items. "Since this is our spot and no one else knows about it, we can hide stuff in here. Let's see... I brought a pillow and an extra blanket- I didn't bring the yellow one because I want to have that one out during the day since it's special- and a deck of cards. Do you know how to play Diamondback? It's really fun, I'll teach you! Uh... I have a couple of books. This one's of fables. You can read it and see if there's any you haven't-"
"Uh, Cato?" Dan interrupted.
"Yeah?"
Dan looked at the pile of stuff between them, picking up a puzzle game Cato had brought in case he got bored. "Where are you going to put all this stuff? We don't have much room to sleep already. I figured that's what you'd be doing here, right? Like what we did last night?"
"Well, yeah. But I'm going to put them in here," he said, patting the cushions. When Dan looked more confused than less, Cato hopped up and pulled Dan to a stand as well before lifting the cushions to reveal a hollow space beneath the nook. "You didn't know about this? It's so apprentices can put their bags someplace safe while they're reading. And since this place is a secret, this is extra safe. Nobody could ever possibly know where it is, so we can be really extra sure that the things in it won't get stolen."
Cato beamed, watching his friend as the gears so obviously turned in his head. "It really is like having our own room. But better! What else did you bring? What's that?"
Dan pointed to his folded game board and the small velvety bag of pieces. "That's for games. One side has chess and the other has Sternhalma. I can teach those to you too if you don't know. I'll try to tell you all the rules before we start; but chess has a lot and sometimes I get them mixed up, especially the horses and the Circles, for some reason."
Cato trailed off, distracted by the mystery of why did he get those two mixed up. His attention snapped back when Dan laughed. "I already know how to play chess. I've never heard of the other one, though. Sternhalma? Is that an elf thing?"
Cato laughed. "It's in Ander. It means 'Star-'... er, star something."
";Halma' is Arcanum for jump," Dan supplied. "Is it from that? If it is, that's really strange."
"Maybe it came from before the Imperium and the Anderfels didn't like each other," Cato reasoned. If so, that was really interesting. "I bet there's a book on it. We should probably find one, just in case we don't know if something's a fair move or not. That way we can look it up and it'll be-" he braced himself to try and pronounce this right. "Non-par-ti-san."
"What's that mean?"
"It's when two groups that usually are fighting each other agree on something. It's a fancy word magisters use sometimes when they don't want to assassinate someone they usually want to assassinate over something, so it's okay if you don't know it."
Dan looked unimpressed. "I don't know if I want to play a game where you're going to want to assassinate me if I play a wrong move."
"That's not-!" Cato chirped, afraid he'd been misunderstood, when he saw Dan trying hard not to smile. It had been a joke. Cato snorted, and shoved Dan's shoulder in mock-anger. "Maybe I should."
"I would like to learn," Dan promised. "But it's starting to get kind of late, and I found this really great book I want to look at, and you should probably try to sleep soon."
Cato wilted slightly. He was happy to be sleeping, more happy to feel safe doing it, but the entire endeavor had developed a strange sense of dread when he thought about it. Cato didn't want to look at that for too long- he had the impression that maybe there was something bigger that would snap at him and lash out if he poked too hard at it, and he was too grateful to actually get some sleep to risk spoiling that just because his feelings were all... bad.
"Okay, but let me finishing showing you all my stuff," he bartered.
Dan agreed, and Cato picked through his puzzles and games, night gown and change of clothes, and showed Dan his knife- briefly- before deciding he would keep this one thing out. Just in case.
"Can I use the hiding spot too?" Dan asked as Cato packed away the last of his little knick-knacks, pulled out the blanket and pillow and changed into his sleeping gown.
Cato shrugged, smoothing out the front of the gown. "Sure! There's plenty of room. What do you want to hide?"
"There are a couple books I think look really nice, but... I'm a little worried that the Librarian won't like me checking them out. So I want to hide them so the other apprentices don't take them," Dan explained, looking away and voice going a step higher. "It's not really important, but-"
"What kind of book aren't you allowed to check out from the library?" Cato asked, surprised. It had to be a really neat book for Dan to not be allowed to read it. All the enchanters say they should read every book they could, so this one had to be extra special.
Dan blushed, cheeks turning red. "It's... uh. It's got sssome pictures."
"It's a picture book?" What kind of picture book would be banned? Picture books weren't impressive- they were for little baby kids like Aunny who couldn't read.
"No," Dan explained, as vaguely as he could. "It's got p-pictures. You know. Pictures."
Dan was trying to suggest something, stressing the words with a certain fluster. The blush had spread out to the tips of his ears and down his neck. Cato still didn't get it. "...I don't get it."
"I can show you, but you have to promise not to t-tell."
Cato nodded, wanting to be in on the secret more and more as time passed. "Course! Best-friend promise."
Dan beamed at him, evidently accepting the oath. "I'll be right back then, I'll go get it."
Dan wormed his way out from the low shelf, and Cato listened to his footfalls until they disappeared. Cato waited, excitement slowly eroding as time passed in favor of worry.
Had something happened? Nothing happened. Dan was human. But what if someone knew Dan was his friend? What if they went after Dan because Cato liked him?
The more he thought about it, the more he was certain that that was precisely what had happened, that Dan was gone and hurt and it was his fault, because he had gotten him all tangled up in his mess. By the time he heard someone walking through the aisle toward their cubby's bookshelf, he was entirely convinced it was someone coming to drag him away, his whereabouts gotten out of his poor friend through some nefarious means.
Cato brought the knife up, pointing it down and trying not to think about whether it was enchanted or not. Eyes, belly and between the legs.
The books on the lowest shelf were pulled out, and-
And Dan's head popped through the hole, a smile and a blush on his face. "Sorry I was- oh."
"Sorry!" Cato apologized, placing the knife back on the shelf behind the books and sitting on his hands in abashedly. "Sorry, you were taking a while and I thought you might have been... someone else."
Dan's face was scrunched. "Okay, but can you not keep pointing knives at me? It's scary."
"I said I was sorry," Cato grumped, feeling guilty.
Dan shook his head and continued to climb through the shelf, dragging a large, new tome behind him. He sat back on the cushions and pulled it onto his lap. "Okay, you know how I like to draw?"
"Yeah," Cato nodded.
"And you know how I like inside stuff? Like muscles and organs and things like that?"
"Yeah, yeah."
"Well, I like to draw pictures sometimes from these books that show all the organs and things, because you can see where everything goes. I read the books and a lot of artists do that, so they can get better. So I was thinking-"
"Okay, but what's in the book?"
"So I was thinking," Dan repeated, emphasis implying that he was getting there. "That I want to find books with pictures of people so I can draw people without them moving around all the time. So I was looking for books with people, and I found... this! Wait... one second. Let me... gotta find the page. Ah! This!"
Dan opened the book to a page with beautiful illustrations. Woodcut prints of women in all sorts of poses. Drawing water from a well, feeding chickens, doing laundry. It looked terribly mundane, except-
"They're naked!" Cato shouted, forgetting himself. Dan nudged his elbow into Cato's side and shushed him. Cato continued, quieter this time but with a conspiratorial bent now that they had proper, legitimate contraband. "Why are they naked? Is this... for bed stuff?"
"I don't think so- it was with the books with all the other regular pictures. It even has other regular pictures in it too! And besides, I don't think people really want to do... uh... 'bed stuff' thinking about girls feeding chickens," Dan reasoned cautiously. He flipped through to show all of the other pages, all sorts of random objects in all sorts of weird angles. "I don't really want to do 'bed stuff' at all. Maybe I'm just not old enough yet, but I really just like the book because it's really good at helping with my drawings. They have tons and tons of pictures of hands! Hands are really hard."
"Yeah, you probably grow into it. Like magic!" Cato agreed. Privately, he was glad that Dan wasn't terribly interested in the drawings on the page for those reasons. They were pretty illustrations, but he felt a similar disinterest in that sort of thing when presented with the pictures. The older boys in the mess hall always made crude jokes that Cato didn't get, and the seemingly universal understanding that girls had bodies that felt good when you look at them went over Cato's head. "I can see why you would think the librarian wouldn't want you to borrow this one, yeah."
"There are a couple more. More pictures of naked people, and also pictures of other things, too," Dan explained. His voice sounded frail. "Thhhe inside stuff I told you about before? They have pictures of people's insides. Elves and Qunari and Dwarves too! They're books for healers, so they know what can go wrong inside of you, but the pictures are really good and have lots of small little things that you wouldn't really notice. Can I show you?"
"Sure!" Cato agreed. If Dan was so excited about it, he wanted to know what all the fuss was about.
Dan pulled up a second book, flipping it open to a diagram of a human torso being spread out to show the intestines, kidneys, liver and stomach and how they all folded tidily into the body. "See? And up here is where the stomach would connect to the- Cato? Are you okay?"
Was he okay? He felt cold and away and sore, sweat prickling on the back of his neck and his body locked tight at the sight of the insides. He had seen those before. It had spilled out of the rat.
When Cato came to his senses, he was on the floor, legs curled so he could fit into the small space of the cubby. Dan was above him, tearstreaked and blotchy in his crying.
"Ck-" he managed, sniffing and sobbing as he leaned back. "Cuh- Catooo?"
"Yeah?" Cato asked, blinking away the strange sleep that overtook him. "What happened?"
"You fffell d-down. I thought mmmaybe you d-d-died," Dan only barely got out between his hitched breath.
"Sorry," he apologized, sitting up. He felt a little dizzy and eased himself back to the ground. He'd get back up in a bit.
"Are yyyou o-oh-okay?" Dan stammered.
Was he? What had even happened? "Ya huh," he decided. "I feel pretty okay now. Little tired. That was weird."
"D-don't you eeever d-do that to me aaagain!" Dan said. He took the pillow off the cubby cushions from where Cato had left it and flopped it at Cato's head, furious. Fhop. Cato's hands came up and clawed at the air to defend himself, swatting at the pillow as Dan brought it back to his chest.
Cato tried sitting up again, feeling less cloudy and more lucid after the pillow attack. His ear, free from their cuffs for the night, swivled back in annoyance. "S'not like I meant to-" Fhop. "Grgh! I didn't mean to do it. Besides, I was still breathing, so-" Fhop. "Would you stop that?!"
"I thhhought-" Fhop. "You-" Fhop. "Died!" Fhop fhop fhop.
"Well I didn't!" Cato snapped, finally managing to catch the pillow as it came down and snatch it out of Dan's grasp. He twisted his body away so he was between Dan and his feathery weapon of choice, nose wrinkled. He stuck his tongue out in defiance for a moment, and Dan began to cry in earnest. Loud, wailing sobs, the likes only a five-year-old could achieve.
Ah jeeze.
"Hey," Cato tried, shoulders slumping and he prodded Dan's shoulder to get his attention. "Hey! I'm okay! See?"
Cato flapped his arms, demonstrating his obvious hail and hearty state. Dan mostly ignored him, stutter stuck as he wailed, "I- I- I-"
"Shhh, I'm fine. I'm okay! You gotta shush, Dan, or people are gonna hear and then they'll come and find us," Cato warned, his voice squeaky from worry. "They like seeing people cry, so you gotta stop. Here. Try this- this works for me. Just don't hit me with it."
Cato passed the pillow back to Dan, who buried his face in the side and gave a very muffled scream. Cato waited awkwardly for his friend's meltdown to subside, slapping his palms on his knees where he sat cross-legged in a random rhythm. Finally, Dan's wailing tapered into wet, nearly silent sniffles. "Yyyou ssscared me."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to! I don't know what happened, I just.. there was a big... thing, and I fell asleep?" Cato explained, poorly. He gave a lopsided smile. "But I'm okay. I'll talk to the dorm master and see if they know what might have happened, so I don't scare you again."
"Yyyou swear you're okay?"
"Ya huh. It felt bad before I went to sleep, but I think you feel worse than I do now," Cato assured him. "I wish I brought snacks. I'd offer you one, but I was afraid we wouldn't eat them in time and they'd get moldy and gross. Or someone would smell them and find out about this place."
"Yeah, maybe don't," Dan agreed, his tears quieting to just jagged little sips of air. When he spoke, he sounded more embarrassed than angry or panicked. "You felt like you were dead."
"Huh?"
"Like how people who are alive feel like air, and dead people feel like swimming in water, sort of?" Dan continued, oblivious to Cato's confusion. "Only, it was more like alive people are air and dead is like... honey. You felt like water."
"What are you even talking about?" Cato asked again, completely lost.
"You <i>know</i>. That feeling when people are alive and when they're dead."
Cato's brow furrowed. "I <i>don't</i> know. Or at least, I never noticed before. I never heard of that."
"Yeah? That's weird. Maybe it's something that'll grow in, like magic or liking girls. I don't think I used to be able to do it," Dan explained, his voice trailing into near silence. It made Cato uneasy.
He didn't want to think about dead things. Even thinking about the book he'd been shown made Cato feel queasy and not good. "Dan, I don't think I should look at those pictures until I figure out what happened."
"Oh," Dan said, voice off. Probably disappointed. Cato hoped he wouldn't start crying again; he already felt bad. "Okay. That's fine, I guess. You should probably sleep anyway. Uh, d'you still want to meet Stardust tomorrow?"
Cato wasn't sure how that was related but he was glad he could at least say yes to this. "Course! He sounds like a nice pony."
"<i>She</i> is a nice pony," Dan corrected him, but seemed satisfied in that at least. Maybe Stardust <i>was</i> real, if Dan could remember that detail. Cato still decided he'd believe it when he saw it.
Dan continued, breaking Cato out of his thoughts. "You're not mad at me, are you?"
"What?"
"It's not bad to like this?" Dan asked, genuinely unsure. "Nobody else does. Sometimes I wonder if there's something wrong with my head, since I like looking at that stuff. I already stutter. What if there's something else... different? I mean, you really, really didn't seem to like it, and you're good. Is it normal, you think?"
Cato suppressed a shudder at the vague reference to the book's contents, but swallowed down the squirmy feeling and nodded. "Don't see why not. Just because it made me-" Cato gestured, unsure of what to call his brief episode, "-doesn't mean it's bad. We don't even know why I-..."
Cato finished off by gesturing wildly again, pleased when he saw his friend's tearstreaked face light up at the playfulness. "So you're not mad at me?"
"Naw, not if you're not mad at me," Cato promised. Dan shook his head vehemently, as if the notion of being cross at Cato was downright repugnant, and Cato nodded. It was settled. "Alright. We're okay."
"Yeah."
"Yeah."
"Cato?"
Cato looked to Dan, whose face seemed to glow now that that was resolved. "Yeah?"
"Go to sleep. The good kind this time."
Cato snorted.
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
Saying that 2021 was rough is kind of an understatement; it kinda feels like it ended up being worse that 2020. I won't lie, but this year was pretty heavy on me and my mental state. The constant quarantine and constantly trying to keep up on that gets tiresome, and I admit that I got very, very lonely. I miss getting a chance to meet with people in events like cons, and while I am grateful for my friends online...well, it's just hard not to feel like this.
I lost my dog Niko this year, which...after the past six years, I miss the little guy so much.
I also feel like I haven't 'recovered' from Yark's passing. It's been a year, but it still feels...not fresh, just...the absence is always present.
My art drive has been all over the place, and the past few months...if I'm completely honest, I dunno if I've felt so much self-doubt or self-loathing before. Plus the garbage that are “NFTs” has really ruined my drive. And there's the ever constant jealousy, but...I've been trying to keep that in check...
It hasn't been all bad though, there has been some good, I have to admit. I have gotten all three of my shots, so I want to keep up on that and, as tiresome as it does get. I want to kick this whole thing to the curbside as much as possible.
I've started a new DnD campaign with some online friends and that has been pretty successful so far, and I'm so thankful for my friends who did want to join in on this, and I'm thankful that they've been patient with me. I do not consider myself a good Dungeon Master at all, and I have plenty of doubt, but everyone has been having fun, so I'm doing something right.
While I feel like I haven't done a lot of art, the art I have done has been good, kinda surprising myself honestly. The one I call “Lonely Time” is probably my favorite of the year. I still have stuff I need to finish, both personal and commission, I just honestly hope I can find my drive again and soon.
I think a highlight was the fact that I actually completed my first ever charity stream for the Ashley Foster Scholarship fund. While I feel like I didn't raise a lot, I am happy that we were able to help that along as much as we did. I also want to thank JulieKarbon and Knave of Clubs for also doing streams as well to help with that. It's great to have gotten a chance to help that along and remember Yark.
So...2022... I don't really like doing resolutions, but I do want to try and do better this year. It's gonna be rough as ever, but...
I want to get my creative drive and motivation back. I miss doing art and writings, and there is so much I still want to do. Stuff like the DnD game have certainly helped with keeping me creative, but I want to get my love of art back and be less hard on myself if I can.
Taking better of myself is also something I like to do. The past two years being stuck in place has not been fantastic and I really want to try and do better in some way. I don't exactly feel comfortable going back to a gym yet, but there are some small things I can do to help with that.
There is a...big project I would love to try and work on, but I know that there is a lot of troubles I would need to figure out to make it work. I never mentioned it publicly for a reason, and there is just a lot of unknowns I would need to figure out before committing, but if it's at all possible to do, I would love to get it done.
So...let's see what happens I guess. Hope for the best.
Thank you to everyone who's been with me throughout all of this. I know I've not been my best, but the support really does mean a lot and I hope that I can improve more this new year.
Take care of yourselves ad be safe.
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
session two
(previous / next)
after a small bit of arguing, pora decides to break off from the group and head towards the lighthouse without them. it's nighttime by the time they get back to shore, which is why leo and yark want to go back into town. on their way to the lighthouse, pora finds a wooden eye with a fork jammed into the side, leaking a red liquid. deciding that the discovery was important, they turn back and show the party.
after that, the group heads back to town. unsure of where to stay for the night, they go back to amelia's residence, with no reply after leo knocks. pora then kicks the door, and they hear a snarl. yark then snarls back, and a banderhobb breaks down the door and eats yark. they fight briefly, before the banderhobb spits yark out and runs off into the night. pora and leo decide to investigate amelia's house while yark waits outside.
the interior is a mess, blood pooled over the kitchen floor, the table and teapots smashed. a blood trail leads to a room with a white door, which reveals a room covered in notes with papers tacked to the walls. no one is able to read the writing on them.
following that, the party finds an inn named the stoker's rest, run by a middle-aged man named uriah von miser. they stay there. pora left a puppet at miser's desk to keep watch, which is how they see him with a piece of copper wire, sending a message to someone about the party's arrival. yark takes a long bath to get the frog spit off him. pora keeps watch of the room for the night.
2 notes
·
View notes