#yaoi of some old troll men

[beashi]

[mochiajclayne]

naruto blank period silly headcanons that no one asked

somehow internet became a thing and the OG gens spent the remainder of their 20s oversharing on the internet instead of marrying each other and having kids

online shopping and tiktok exists (for shit and giggles)

you can't convince me that lee isn't participating in every tiktok dance trend and dragging the rest of the boys with him

kiba and suigetsu are trolls that have beef in social media but are dating irl don't even ask how they got together I just know they're menaces and a force to be reckoned with

ino would do those get ready with me videos or something...most likely to post a video cutting her bangs

naruto getting multiple parcels because let's be real he'd resort to retail therapy at some point

sakura would do those funny doctor and/or nurse skits except it's her nursing a hangover tsunade with shizune

everyone would ask for neji's hair routine let's be real

naruto and sasuke would do that best friend trend on nart's account and it's them waxing poetics for each other (the rest of konoha populace just want them to DATE ALREADY)

everyone collectively canceling orochimaru and the only one that defends him is kabuto who gets canceled too

sasuke has one post and it's a ten minute video of him going on a tangent about the fascist shinobi system with images of the council with red X on their faces and naruto holds it at the background proudly (still the highest liked video in the platform)

choji would do food reviews and he'd earn a living for it yup yup

kakashi and gai dominates the old men yaoi tag don't even ask how (the second one is kakashi and iruka)

[scariercnidaria]

another kerapin modern au where lapin is a medieval history professor at a uni and keradin is a financial lawyer who took one of his classes because he was interested in the crusades and he needed a history credit 8 years ago. he ended up dropping the class after a semester and a half at his therapist (pastor) (who just so happened to be a friend of the police officer assigned to the case) polite "suggestion" (restraining order threat), after developing a bit of a psychosexual obsession with lapin and doing a little trolling (targetted harrassment/stalking). in the interim keradin got another therapist (real one) (court mandated) and is on mood stabilisers now but still has not stopped seething about professor cadburys evil woke cultural marxist agenda.

lapin in this scenario is living with amethar in theos Eternal Bachelor Pad. he was living with amethar and caramellina (with reduced rent in exchange for tutoring jet and ruby who are probably like 14 in this scenario [so sorry for de aging them all a little bit i know im committing old men yaoi crimes it just makes slightly more sense this way. itd still be like. lapin 56+, keradin 31, amethar 44, theo ~46, caramellina 49]) until The Divorce (over finanicial disputes - amethars business is crumbling and is bringing caramellindas down with it as she just cant keep funnelling profits from her business into amethars in order to keep it afloat any longer; amethars purported unfaithfulness is not really an issue here because um This is just politics).

theo is trying to find an excuse to kick lapin out without making amethar feel worse about the situation but the only thing he has on him is that hes a bitch and smokes weed outside the laundry room sometimes but its been legalised and anyway lapin is never late on rent cause he has like 700 jobs (on top of being a history professor, lapin also has a side hustle leading bdsm/consent workshops at the library and also moonlights as a professional dom at a local sex club) (he also is still tutoring jet and ruby (for money this time) and has a positive relationship with caramellinda (they bitch about amethar) but she wont let him move back in because she "needs space"). theo thinks they have a weird gay thing going on (and hates it) and lapin is aware that theo thinks this and plays into it (because its funny) (and also hates it)

meanwhile in the keradinosphere, he has been consistently working ~60 hour weeks at his one (1) job at the same law firm for the last 5 years with no (0) promotion. his life is literally: work (10 hours), gym (2 hours), commute (2 hours each way), doomscroll on The App (5 hours), sleep (3 hours) every day forever.

on saturdays he works from home and on sundays he has church and then spends 3 hours sitting on a bench at the park "chilling out" (staring into the distance) (he doesnt own any books) before going to his court mandated weekly therapy session. his apartment is a textbook r/malelivingspace populated with an absolutely obscene collection of anime posters, lifting equipment, nerd shit replica medieval weapons or something and also an ever-rotating cast of Windowsill Plants Of The Month because he cant stop accidentally killing them and bursting into tears. his therapist tells him this is progress and that his drywall & security deposit will thank him

at some point some disaster hits keradin or something and they make him take sometime off work, and strangely without spending 10 hours under high stress bullshit every day + some melatonin he is actually for once in his life able to get more than 3 hours of sleep per night. at the same time, keradins The App experience starts being psy-op'ed by a memepage called xXsugarPlvmF4IRY_ who has infiltrated his niche internet tradbulb /fit/ microculture and begun flooding it with """ironic""" grecian gay sex "RETVRN" propaganda. this is a big hit as far as engagement among terminally online perpetually enraged historypilled incel-adjacent men such as keradin, and 6 hours of seething at ancient femboys combined with 8 hours of sleep and his brain unshrivelling somewhat results in him starting to have Gay Sex Dreams, which metastatises into him having Regular Gay Thoughts in the conscious world. he is too mortified to tell his pastor (because it is a liberal church and hes worried hell be supported) so he tells his therapist instead in hopes that they will recommend conversion therapy.

spoiler alert they dont. they encourage him to test the waters at his own pace by passing him a flyer for a consent workshop at the library later in the week in hopes that it will help him Get Comfortable With Sex As A Concept. keradin shoves the flyer in his sock drawer hoping to ignore it but is so haunted that he stays up all night doing some inspired googling and eventually learns about bdsm and is like woah! just like bulbo from my self-flagellation! he tries his best to resist the urge but he cant stop thinking about it and hes found he quite likes getting 8 hours of sleep and this New Stress is compromising that. eventually he looks up the number for a local sex club and books an hour and a half-- the following day, so he doesnt have time to chicken out-- with "father candi" (priest roleplay) ($120 out of pocket) (he tries not to think about having to face his actual pastor after this).

keradin goes there and surprise surprise its lapin.

keradin thinks he seems a little bit familiar but he cant quite put his finger on from where... so he discards the thought, and lapin straight up doesnt recognise him either so it all goes ahead.

lapin asks about boundaries and keradin is like "what are boundaries" so lapin spends the first hour and 15 minutes explaining boundaries and trying to get keradin to come up with something, anything dear bulb please. eventually they settle on a very rudimentary list and lapins like. ok that took ages we have 15 minutes left if you want to try and scene and keradin made it this far he isnt going to leave without at least trying gay sex It Would Kill Him. so they do an incredibly light d/s scene involving a confession booth or something and keradin comes within 2 minutes and then hits lapin with the old "if by my life or death i can protect you i shall". and lapin is like. um ok. thats nice. your time is up tho do u want a warm wet towel and a glass of water. ok. cool (<- his ass is clocking out immediately)

keradin immediately goes home and books another time slot precisely one month to the hour after the last one. during that month he goes back to work, is assigned to do some donkey work noone else wanna do on some fraud investigation around some local failing businesses, replaces his windowsill plant again, spends marginally less time on The App and somehow manages to look his pastor in the eye. he doesnt tell his therapist about the experience but they do ask how the consent workshop went and keradin lies and said it was good it was interesting and they ask like is that it so he badly paraphrases something lapin said about boundaries to get them off his back. they give him a flyer for the next one and keradin still doesnt go.

the month passes and he goes back and has another epic gay sex moment with father candi. and it becomes a regular occurance. every month, on the dot, like clockwork. for a while keradin is fucking crushed under the pressure of trying to come up with a non-gaysex reason for why he has to leave work before 7pm for once every month on the exact same day but nobody actually cares enough to ask him. and hes relaxed. hes not on The App. his windowsill plant lives for 2 months this time. so its just. like. good. its just a good situation.

...maybe too good.

[EXTREMELY LOUD BULBIAN GUILT SFX]

lapin, largely unaware of this, thinks the whole thing is pretty amusing. he knows that keradin works some stuffy office job and has some major religious hangups but he mostly just wants to be beat up a little and then praised and he always walks out 5gorillion % less stressed than he came in and its like ok. lapin can do that. its literally the least weird thing anyones ever asked him to do in a scene. yeah keradin is hot but mostly lapin wants to put him under a microscope and study him like a bug. its like having a favourite customer. he doesnt really think about it outside of when he knows its coming up its literally not that deep.

besides, he has other things to worry about like more pressingly: that amethar is being investigated by the IRS for being bad at running a business and if he goes to prison then theres no way theo will let him keep staying at his flat (the novelty of playing along with theos "weird gay thing" suspicions wore off, like, so fucking quick). he could go stay with his old scene partner "sugar plum mommy" but her whole place looks like serial experiments lain and he will not be able to grade papers over the sound of her bumping grindcore out a subwoofer she stole from a nightclub 4 years ago for 13 hours straight while she joshua citarellas the target audience for europa universalis into getting gayer than they already were.

meanwhile keradin literally cannot stop thinking about hot gay sex gay religious old man sex in your area click here right now and he feels crazy wazy and conflicted and awful about it and on the verge of getting psychosexually obsessed again. he decides to bring it up with his therapist finally because what are they gonna do? court mandate that he gets More Therapy? they end up being like ok yknow what would be really good for this actually is if you Went to the consent workshop ive been telling you about all this time. it would definitely help. its at the library its free. theres one in 30 minutes. ill drive you there (maybe not precisely).

either way. keradin goes. and guess whose fucking running it.

keradin stays but sits in the back and only feels slightly awkward but for once its like. no this is. it would be a good thing if father candi saw that i was here. i am listening and learning.

and he sits there.

in the back of the library.

set out like a lecture hall.

listening and learning.

and it slowly dawns on him exactly why "father candi" seemed so familiar.

[kharmii]

Emmet: Would you want to bang me if I was an enormous stinky white dog?

Ingo: *takes conductor's cap off and pukes in it*

Ingo: Sorry about that...a touch of the flu. What's a dog? Is that like a mightyena?

Emmet: I think it's supposed to be something larger and more rank, such as a stoutland.

-So I did a drawing where the Subway Bosses are doing the same thing as the gardevoir in the Twitter link....they are looking at all the nonsense put up about them on the internet and having some sort of reaction. Unlike any gardevoir, they are probably enjoying the nsfw and wish there was more of a percentage. -Like why is 99% of gardevoir fan art on Pixiv R18, but they are only getting around 15% on the Subway Masters Yaoi tag? They are grown men! -And poor Emmet is likely perturbed that he's getting the worst representation in the dark!fics and other AUs. Ingo might be post Hisui amnesiac and relying on Emmet to let him in on what's real and what's bullshit. Emmet is straightforward and honest and willing to tell him the absolute truth...even if it shows them -or just him- in a terrible light.

I have sort of a beef with the blankshipping fandom lately, like why has it been hijacked by furries all of a sudden? What does a guy banging every sort of animal have to do with identical twins in train conductor's costumes? It's like Old Macdonald Had a Farm around the blankshipping tag, like a barkbark here and a moomoo there... (with me like here a barf there a barf everywhere a barf barf). It would make more sense if both twins were an animal in the Pokemon world, such as twin lucarios or lycanrocs in trainmen uniforms.....because they are identical twins, and people into blankshipping are into the idea of romance between identical twins. There is the one person whom I won't link to due to the nature of this post who does the hot take where, instead of being two autistic guys mistaken for zoroarks, they are actual half-zoroarks. This person is heavily into the trainwreckshipping tag. Go check them out because it's fun.

Side note: The same furries into animal farking have told me a couple times they aren't into the Melli or Volo ships. -So they aren't into the twins getting perfect ten in looks characters who are actually canon, but they'll be beastophiles? Some of them act as if this fandom is getting stale already, like Ingo has only been in Hisui since the third week of January 2022. While I'm still getting excited about reunion hugs, furries be like, "What if there were four Ingos, and Emmet two days out of every month turned into a huge stanky dog with two dicks and four balls? What if all four Ingos liked to screw the dog version of Emmet, on average, ten times more than the human version?" (And no, that isn't a commission I'm considering)

Oh well, I guess any content is better than no content. I wouldn't want to go back to when I first got into this, and the only blankshipping content was that one depressing post-Hisui story on AO3 where Emmet moped around thinking, "Before Hisui, I used to give Ingo head until I choked. Now he just thinks I'm his brother...." *sniff*

The other weird thing was that someone made a blankshipping Discord, and they wouldn't let new members view the blacked out text or adult channel unless they provided a form of ID with their birth date on it. A lot people clearly were uncomfortable about this, and the mod said that they could black everything else out except the birthdate. It seemed like bs because even R18 channels featuring irl people doing it don't require ID. They claimed it was to prevent minors from joining....in a fandom that's mostly older people like 25+ of age, and a bunch of them acted all paranoid about anti infiltration trolling. I thought it would be funny to present a fake id...but eh.

That's another thing......all this anti paranoia seems unfounded. I got some anon-hate when I first got into blankshipping, but after they all blocked me in the first two weeks, I was left alone. The blankshippers act as if they don't want to interact with the main Submas tag -because of such fear of antis- but some of the best non-dog screwing shippy content can be found on the main. Maybe the artists don't exactly mean it to come across that way, but my imagination goes there more often than not.

.................and finally, I showed a male friend on another forum my posts about Yandere fiction. He has experience hearing about the worst-of-the-worst in both the sci-fi and furry communities. I had been looking at yandere from the perspective of a female who fantasizes about being the fixation of the yandere. He, otoh, assumed the artists looked at it from the perspective of the yandere and believes that it might be coded as pedophiles who want to kidnap children and lock them in sex dungeons. What....also.....does that have to do with identical, adult-ass adult train muppets? I guess that would be true based on if the person writing the fiction were male or female? I'm used to assuming everybody in fandom is a female (or a transmale... whatever). Anyway, I'm sure this is mostly creative autism but people shouldn't get all huffy when antis are suspicious of their kinks.

[ardenttheories]

Homestuck's always been antagonistic and insensitive, but I don't recall seeing any of you try to dox Hussie? But please, continue to rationalise how cyberbullying lgbt people for not being nice enough and having opinions about a fictional character you disagree with puts you in the right. A story doesn't go the way you'd like and this is how you respond? You COULD have just not bothered reading it instead of CHOOSING to make your online life about something you hate like a toxic weirdo.

Hi, Kate. I’m so glad you could find my blog. (Edit: that was a joke. Apparently, some anons find it impossible to tell that I don’t actually think you’re Kate). It’s clear to me that you didn’t take the time to read through any of the content that’s actually on here, since you’re throwing around rather wild accusations, so let me take this down step by step.

Homestuck has only rarely been antagonistic and insensitive. Things like the Alpha Trolls - which were clear criticisms of fandom culture - were relatively few and far between, and when we complained about them, they actually stopped. Remind me, for instance, how relevant the Alpha Trolls were to the plot? How long they stayed as mockeries towards the fandom? Yeah, not long. I actually have talked about this before on the blog - alongside other things I thought were negative towards the fandom from the original comic - but the difference here is that... in the entirety of Homestuck, these things were outliers and inconsistencies. They stuck out because they were in stark contrast to the otherwise wonderfully handled content Homestuck went over.

For instance, Homesuck is critical of abuse - especially in terms of relationships. We see through a critical lense the shit normalisation of parental abuse can do to a child - with actual talk of triggers and of the mental and emotional scarring left behind, and the complexities of the child’s feelings towards the parent’s death through Dave - and we see how self destructive relationships can be, how harmful they are, and how hard it can be to leave them - such as Terezi’s very toxic blackrom with Gamzee, which was always portrayed as something negative and harmful especially with how worried Karkat was for her and how withdrawn she became during its run, and Dirk’s relationship with Jake, which goes very much over how communication can cause a deterioration in romantic relationships especially when the two participants have conflicting mental illnesses. 

It also goes over how men, though they can be mired in toxic masculinity, can choose to be good. How sometimes we’re not born as good people, but we can become good people through the love we have for the people around us, through frequent attempts to check what we’re doing, through the sheer willpower to be good. Dirk’s entire arc, knowing that he could very easily become Bro but deciding he doesn’t want to be, that it’s something he wants to work on, is so important and incredibly powerful. Mental illness in men is often just given as an excuse to make them violent with no attempts at betterment - so Dirk actually existed as proof that you don’t have to be that stereotype. 

In contrast, Homestuck^2 completely uncritically gave Jade, who was cis, a dog dick, made her, a bisexual woman, a sex maniac and the yaoi “woman who gets in the way of the gays” trope, made her a cheater and someone who forced her partner into the relationship to begin with, and made her a neglectful mother after having cheated with her best lesbian friend in something that has incredible recall to just about every futanari video ever - and they tried to claim that this was good representation of trans women, actually, and that the only reason we didn’t like it is that Jade is “a woman” who “has sex”.

Likewise completely uncritically, they made Gamzee, an anti-black stereotype, enter a relationship with Jane, a fascist, and then made the entire thing into a cuck joke wherein Jake being frequently drunk and sexually assaulted was funny because he wasn’t “man enough”. They then forced him to go back to his abuser after he left her in a scene that read very much like, “ridiculous man thinks woman is abusing him, go back and do your manly job”. 

This, of course, doesn’t even go into the travesty that is any form of trans representation in the comic. Roxy, a trans man, is barely even focused on as trans; they make no attempt to enforce in the fandom that he’s a trans man the way they do that June is a trans woman, and even then, they seem to think that just saying someone is a trans woman is actually good representation. Not, like, bringing it into the comic - just saying that it’s a thing. And of course, that’s not even going into the completely uncritical lense they have of Vriska, wherein her being a trans woman completely frees her of any and all blame for the past abuses she has comitted, and once again she becomes an amazing character to save the day without a single flaw - which in turn inherently associates trans women with abuse apologism, abusers, and the ideology that just because we’re trans we can get away with anything scott free. 

I honestly cannot think of one instance of good and genuine representation in Homesuck^2, nor can I think of any scene where negative content was actually treated as the negative thing it actually is. There’s no critical lense at all, not like we have in Homestuck; there’s just no fucking comparison. And this isn’t a one-off situation, either. Whereas Homestuck does do fuck ups - isn’t perfect - in between the otherwise brilliant content, Homestuck^2 is just founded upon these horrific takes. There’s almost no good content in between, and what is left is a slog to get through when surrounded by the thick slurry of shit that compromises futa Jade, abuse apologism Vriska, and victim blaming Jake. 

Of course, we didn’t “doxx” Hussie. Hussie actually listened to our complaints, for the most part, and worked with us to create something that worked well. The way Homestuck^2 was touted to work. You know, since it was meant to be written with the fandom in mind, influenced by the things we suggest and react to. We went into Homestuck^2 with the explicit idea that we were going to be listened to and taken into consideration when it was being written - the way we were with old Homestuck. I’m very sorry to say that, when you make these expectations, people are going to be a titchy bit upset when you then commandeer the entire thing and exclude the fandom from any of the process that you said they were going to be part of.

Additionally, it’s rather funny, isn’t it, that what you call doxxing is actually just people upset with how triggering content is being handled, and going to the people who actually wrote the content in order to voice their complaints? It’s almost as if social media exists to allow this communication between reader and author, which is a fundamental thing you’ll learn in any creative writing course, such as the one I’m on currently, wherein you’re actually taught how to respond to social media and to build up your image with your fans. 

Homestuck^2 is an ongoing piece of media. We’re well aware that we have a potential to change these uncritical takes and the horrific way they’re being handled if the writers will just listen to genuine criticism. This is, frankly, no different to the people who go to J. K. Rowling’s Twitter to tell her how harmful her transphobic comments are; because if she believes these things, they will work their way into her texts and will perpetuate harmful ideologies. 

The literal same thing is happening in Homestuck^2 - again, such as futa Jade, which normalises the point of view that bisexuals are cheaters and completely trivialises what it means to be trans, or Gamzee, which perpetuates just about every anti-black stereotype possible. Media does have a very powerful impact on what people see in the real world. This is why, for instance, positive black characters are so important in media; if they’re always portrayed as villains, then people will see real world black people as villains as the ideology is perpetuated to the point of fact. This is especially true if the people already believe in the ideology.

Fiction is one of the best ways that we can counteract this cycle. If you make a character that they like, and they happen to be positive representation, and then they watch more media that is likewise positive representation, it’s more likely to stick that these positive representations are the actual experiences of minority groups. Also? It’s important TO those minority groups. A black person, especially right now, doesn’t want to see an anti-black stereotype fuck a fascist, engage in sexual assult, and then enact pedophilia - only to die at the hands of a hero and be laughed at for the death. Surprisingly, shit like this is why we need to tell the writers that what they’re doing is harmful, that they’re perpetuating phobic ideologies, and that we need better representation - especially in a comic that is this widely read, and also has a very large minor fanbase. 

I shouldn’t need to explain why exposing minors to anti-black stereotypes, transphobic, homophobic, biphobic, abuse apologism, victim blaming, and the trivialisation of rape and sexual assault (especially towards men), might be a federal fucking issue. 

So, no, we’re not actually cyberbullying LGBT+ people. We’re trying to hold shitty writers accountable for the incredibly toxic and harmful ideologies they’re forcing into a text that has always been written with critical thought in mind. 

I should also point out how funny it is that you’re focusing on how some of the writers are LGBT+ - as if we’re not? I’m trans, I’m gay, and I’m ace. Yes, I can actually be these things and absolutely furious that a trans women is writing some of the most transphobic shit I’ve seen in a while into characters she then claims to be completely free of blame. We can be furious that people within our own community are enforcing negative stereotypes.

Being LGBT+ does not make them free from blame. We cannot give them a free pass to be racist, to be transphobic, to be homophobic, biphobic, to be abuse apologists, just because they’re LGBT+. Not only because that’s just a terrible fucking idea to begin with, but because it also reflects so, so badly on the community as a whole. As if being part of the community instantly means that you can do no wrong? As if there can be no toxicity within our own community, despite the fact that there very much is and it is still an issue to this day?

That is such an issue, one of the biggest issues even shown just in Vriska and the way Kate handles her as a whole - and, once again, is WHY we need to get them looking at this shit more critically. This view that LGBT+ people can do no wrong and cannot be criticised is shoved into Homestuck^2 and, once again, perpetuates the ideology. This isn’t something to be proud of. This isn’t something that’s actually okay.

Also, your point that the writers aren’t nice enough and that we disagree on fictional characters - well, I’ve already been over the second part. But for the first part, I would like to remind you that they aren’t just random LGBT+ people on the internet that we’re going to because we think their takes are a little shitty. They’re actual writers working on a piece of media. They are official content creators. 

Again, one of the first things you learn on any creative writing course is that when you become a writer, you gain a significant amount of responsibility for your interactions with the fandom. This is something that you genuinely have to expect, and if you don’t, then, unfortunately you just don’t know what it means to write something that thousands of people have a potential to read. As a writer, it is your responsibility to portray your image online; it is your responsibility to engage with the fans in a meaningful way; it is your responsibility to not cause drama and to listen when criticism is brought up, to have genuine discussion and not to perpetuate hatred - especially towards your own fanbase.

Consider, for instance, the way I’m talking to you right now. This is the sort of tone that someone should take when talking to a fan about genuine criticism. When things are brought up, you go over them step by step, you listen, you write back - you don’t go on a flurry of “fuck yous” to a minor who asked you why your team didn’t post anything about the BLM movement on the official Twitter, and you definitely don’t respond to every comment with genuine criticism with the word “pigshit”. You almost definitely don’t tell your trans masculine and masculine-aligned nonbinary fans that their opinions don’t matter.

As a writer, Kate and the rest of the team have a responsibility with their interactions with their fans. They aren’t just normal fandom voices anymore; they’re official fandom voices, voices that have more weight behind them than anyone else. They’re who people are going to turn to when it comes to anything regarding Homestuck^2. Their words now reflect literally everything about Homestuck^2, the future of Homestuck as an expanded universe, and the opinions of the group as a whole. They have to be careful with what they say. They have to be held to the same standards as industry voices because that’s essentially what they are - especially now that Homestuck is something you pay for. 

Also, this isn’t a point of the story not going the way I want. This is a point of many of people in the fandom being upset with how content is being handled, upset that their voices are being shut down, upset that triggering content is being laughed at or used flippantly and without care or respect. This is people being upset that trigger warnings were removed specifically to make the comic unsafe for them as a punishment for daring to say that something was wrong. This is people being upset that a piece of media that used to be so fucking good at portraying sensitive content in a critical light, that used to be so good at normalising LGBT+ identities and healthy representations of those identities, has suddenly turned to this. 

The story can go whatever way it wants - and frankly, that’s fine be my. What isn’t fine is that content is being used specifically to hurt and to incite.

And, of course, that final piece; nothing will improve if we don’t say that it’s wrong to begin with. Someone needs to voice the complaints of the fanbase, othrewise these toxic ideologies are going to go unchecked. One of the biggest things I’ve come to understand while making these posts is that a significant portion of the fandom feels isolated in their hurt; they don’t think other people feel the same way they do, and several people have mentioned feeling like they were going crazy because they were upset with things that the text and writers are normalising. It’s so important to make sure that these people know they’re not alone. It’s so important to make sure that our voices are heard. It’s so important to try and create critical discussion and debate over something that so many people still fucking love. 

The thing is, I don’t hate Homestuck^2. I actually really, desperately wish I could enjoy it. I wish I could read through it and theorise, could go in depth about how amazing the characters are, could write long and extensive posts on how creative and engaging it is - could even just go on about how interesting the Meat-Candy divide is, and all the points they’re trying to make about canonicity. But I genuinely fucking can’t. There is just so, so much wrong in the text that is completely unrelated to plot and to the overarching Point that makes it impossible for me to read, to want to read, to try to encourage other people to read. They’re things that literally don’t need to be in there, either; stereotypes and toxic ideologies and uncritical or badly handled sensitive topics that could be rectified so, so easily. 

Homestuck^2 could be amazing for a lot of the fandom. It could be something that we all rally around the same way we did for the original comic. For for a lot of people, it has ruined their fandom experience, has ruined their desire to want to read anything more to do with Homestuck, and has caused a significant portion of the fandom to just drop out entirely. That in and of itself should be a sign that this isn’t just a little fandom drama. That this is something much bigger and much more serious that, just maybe, needs to be looked into, talked about, understood - and, potentially, changed. 

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

Amy Martinez (Character Sheet TV Tropes Style) U-Y

Uncanny Valley Girl: Has the appearance of a conventionally cute and upbeat school girl... who’s killed at least fifteen people to date, knows how to manipulate people and can display a callous, cheerfully psychotic side whenever she’s crossed. 

Undying Loyalty: To her Coven, as they took her in after her parent’s death when Hero Society felt unable to and despite the atrocities and horrors she’s witnessed she’s fiercely protective and devoted to her coven and even sets out back to Japan to connect both the world of Witches and Heroes together so her kind wouldn’t be ostracized or demonized anymore.

Unstoppable Rage: After the culture festival, she goes into one of these and beats her teachers and Midoriya when they attempt to stop her. She’s only stopped when Midoriya starts crying and when Shinsou gives her a sad look and gently talks her down, followed by Cordelia. 

Used To Be a Sweet Kid: Amy’s certainly still capable of being sweet, but she used to be a relatively stable, genuinely happy child who had yet to do anything horrible. In fact, the worst thing she did as a child was steal a bouncehouse so that way Shinsou could have one for his birthday party. In modern times, while she’s gradually improved and her sanity has strengthened, she’s still a troublemaker who performs much more lethal pranks and still participates in murder.

Violently Protective Girlfriend: She knows that Bakugo can take care of himself, but doesn’t stand for Madison taunting him, and beats the HELL out of two other witches who attack and threaten him.

Amy: Get the fuck away from my Katsuki you bitches! 

Vitriolic Best Buds: With Midoriya and Iida mostly. She and Midoriya’s relationship was strained for a time during their first year in UA but slowly started to patch up over the course and while Amy still likes to tease Midoriya, he holds no ill will towards her and they have managed to rebuild their friendship and Amy still adores him despite everything.

She and Iida bicker nearly every single day and Amy pranks him constantly and gives him a hard time every chance she gets, but Iida still cares about Amy and looks after her, and Amy secretly appreciates him, respects him and cares about him enough to adhere to him at times.

Weak But Skilled: Amy’s an EXTREMELY gifted witch and knows how to use her powers and spells very well, but isn’t the most physically powerful girl nor is she as skilled in combat as others are.

We Want Our Jerk Back: Inverted, Amy’s always been something of a jerk but was still a cheerful, supportive and comical friend to her class, but when she leaves the class notes that it didn’t feel right without her and missed her immature sense of humor.

Also shown in the Internship arc where Amy does briefly return to intern with Endeavor along with Midoriya, Bakugo and Todoroki, only she’s apathetic, bored and downright emotionless and the three boys each make at least one attempt to see if a glimpse of her old self is still in there. With Bakugo outright demanding her to crack a smile or at least laugh or giggle as she always used to in the time he’s known her. 

Weight Woe: Despite what she preaches about body positivity, Amy is actually very self-conscious about her weight which is why she wears considerably more conservative and modest clothing compared to her other female friends. Doesn’t help that she gains weight easily and can even fall into a depression when it becomes very apparent. 

What The Hell Hero?: Midoriya gives her one of these when she acts callously after she and Bakugo are rescued and later during the Culture Festival where Amy refuses to partake in their class dance out of spite towards him. Amy later starts to give herself these when she realizes that she’s gone too far, particularly in having the intent of seriously harming Midoriya during a fight she wins.

Why Did It Have To Be Snakes?: Amy doesn’t have much phobias, but she IS afraid of seagulls for some reason, calling them the ‘devil’. She’s also terrified of cockroaches, centipedes and holes. 

Wicked Witch: She at times acts like this, mostly just to troll her friends and scare them even though she DOES have some of the habits such as the evil cackle, penchant cats and wearing black and even lives in a mansion just outside the city.

Wife Basher-Basher: Amy doesn’t hesitate to threaten to personally murder and torture Endeavor if he ever raises a hand to Todoroki, his mother or any of his children again. 

Wild Card: Amy’s on neither the heroes side or the villains side, but she IS on her coven’s side which means she does as she pleases, shows no obligation to UA or Hero Society and is there primarily for Shinsou’s sake and for the sake of battling other people to show off her powers. This becomes subverted when she develops strong friendships with her classmates, falls in love with Bakugo and makes friends with her classmates, especially Ashlen.

Witch Hunt: Was the victim of one even in Japan as witch hunters broke into her house, destroyed her home, killed her dog, burnt her mother to the stake and lynched her father. She was nearly burnt to the stake herself only for the Pro-Heroes to save her, but because they weren’t willing to care for her with the risk of other witch hunters infiltrating their society as well, Amy was forced to move to America with other witches, but the hunt didn’t stop there as her godmother’s husband was a witch hunter who nearly killed her and her other sisters until they were all killed by the Axemen. Amy states that witch hunters still exist and while the war may never end, that she and her sisters fight back more.

Woman In Black: Just like her sisters, Amy loves to wear black and adorns an all-black Hero Costume.

Woman Scorned: After Amy confesses that she’s in love with Midoriya, he doesn’t think she’s being serious and instead scolds her for her lack of cooperation in the Culture Festival and overall fluctuating attitude. Which leads to a big argument but when he calls her selfish and cruel, Amy completely loses it and challenges him to a fight out of nowhere, in which she lashes out her anger at him by beating him and spewing her now negative feelings towards him as she wins the fight. She gets over this thank goodness but it’s still something she’s not proud of.

Whenever Bakugo breaks up with her, she’s aggressive and cold to him and on worse days she’ll attack him with her telekinesis.

Women Are Wiser: Generally averted as Amy’s actually the least mature girl in Class A, but can display common sense when it’s needed.

Woobie, Destroyer Of Worlds: Amy might be a crazy, spiteful and wicked girl, but was forced to abandoned her best and only friend, including said best friend’s family who loved her like a daughter, and she felt rejected by her own society when they gave her away to strangers, didn’t even bother to check on her even though these strangers ended up indirectly exposing her to even more horrors that further traumatized her the point where she suffered nightmares, bullying from eve other witches and has contemplated suicide. 

Would Hurt a Child: Implied but never shown. Amy notes that with children having superpowers now, that there’s not many lines to cross since their powers can be used to fight back and has no qualms roughing up younger kids should they piss her off. 

Inverted also, Amy has no problems killing adults, nor did she have any issue in beating the shit out of her own teacher. 

But also Averted. Despite Amy claiming that she will hit a child should they piss her off, she’s never actually done it. In fact, even when she disliked Eri, she did absolutely nothing to (physically) harm the girl because she said she’s “not a monster” and couldn’t do anything like that to her. 

However, she DOES hit a younger witch of 10 when she kicks her in the groin and Amy pays back the favor by punching her in the stomach. 

Yandere: She beats the tar out of Midoriya when he accidentally spurns her feelings for him, attacks Uraraka via telekinesis in a fit of jealousy, treats Eri coldly out of jealousy due to Aizawa offering her care and also beats the tar out of him too for not stepping in to take care of her when she lost her family.

In a moment much more Played For Laughs, she threatens and shouts at Bakugo for dumping her for the first time and says that she’ll murder him in his sleep before he thinks he can get away with it. However, Amy DOES relapse into insanity when she thinks that Bakugo doesn’t love her.

Yaoi Fangirl: It’s much less to do with the fetish and more to do with Amy being extremely passionate about gay rights as she squeals whenever she sees a healthy gay couple between two men and was more than happy to help John Henry Moore into getting out there to start dating men again.

Then there’s the fact that she’s written erotic fanfiction about her own friends (much like Tina Belcher) and reveals that she ships Bakugo and Todoroki, Bakugo and Kirishima, Kaminari and Bakugo, Kaminari and Sero, Tokoyami and Shouji, Tokoyami and Kouda, Shinsou and Tokoyami, Midoriya and Kirishima and Shinsou and Monoma and even Shinsou and Kaminari.

You Are Better Than You Think You Are: To her shame, Amy tends to be uplifted when people reassure her, especially from Shinsou, Ashlen and Cordelia. Shinsou often reassures her whenever she thinks she doesn’t belong in Hero Society, and Cordelia gladly tells her that despite what her society did to her, that the coven wouldn’t be complete without her and her sensitive heart. And then Ashlen comes into the picture and appears to love her for all her flaws, as she embraces her imperfections and tells her that she wouldn’t be her best friend if she weren’t the way she is. 

You Can’t Go Home Again: After her parents are killed by witch hunters who infiltrated Japan the pro-heroes were unwilling and unable to watch over and care the young witch, which urges Aizawa to call the coven from New Orleans. And when Cordelia, Fiona and Myrtle arrive to retrieve her and take her to Robichaux Academy, a safe haven in New Orleans, America for young witches such as herself to be her new home. However, they also tell her that she won’t be able to return to her former life in Japan and can’t stay in any contact with Shinsou and his family for not just Amy’s protection but for Shinsou’s protection as well.  Thankfully she IS able to return to Japan, but only as she got older and witches being outed to the world which encouraged Hero Society to be more accepting of witches.

You Got Spunk: She goes with Midoriya, Bakugo and Todoroki during the Winter internship with Endeavor and because Amy has no filter with the pro-hero, openly disrespects him to the point of threatening him, he is partially amused but impressed by how ballsy she is.

Endeavor: This brat has hellfire in her...

You Never Did That For Me: The minute Amy finds out about Eri’s existence, she’s initially sympathetic... until she hears that the pro-heroes are going to take care of her and that UA is going to adopt her and place her into a more caring environment with responsible adults and older kids who look after her. As it all sinks in, Amy realizes and calls them out for taking in a girl with unstable powers, but didn’t do the same thing for her at all even though she was also a girl with unstable powers, and that instead they gave her away to strangers who did a less than stellar job and her ‘guardians’ exposed her to even more trauma. This is what triggers her into attacking and injuring Midoriya and Aizawa, and then leaving UA for 2 whole months out of anger and hurt. 

You Wouldn’t Like Me When I’m Angry: No... you really wouldn’t. Amy even says this word for word at times, or just outright warning others to ‘get the fuck out’ or else she’ll ‘get angry’ and she normally lives up to her warnings as when truly angry, Amy’s powers cause things around her to break and the building to tremble if she’s really pissed off. 

Yuri Fangirl: Much like it’s stated above, Amy also grows very excited and happy when she sees a healthy lesbian couple and also likes to pair her friend Mallory with Coco due to their strong friendship. Amy also adores the Steven Universe cartoon because of the prevalent lesbian relationships in it, and was disappointed when she found out Yuri! On Ice didn’t have actual yuri.