#y'all i cannot believe it happened finally

[marysong-mp3]

where were you when taylor finally played mary's song

[gu6chan]

y'all im on cloud fucking NINE rn more news to come bc i wanna make sure things are set in STONE by the time i respond, but i think finally i can respond to this ask that's been in my askbox since almost the time this account was created 😭 im so emotional rn

[natriae]

ushijima was definitely a little innocent boy in highschool. and no this is not me tryna make him seem so babygirl cuz y'all he looks like he'd crush you, but you cannot tell me that that man was not so obsessed with playing volleyball for his parents approval to the point he missed out of basic puberty things.

Like homie probably woke up with his first boner and thought he needed to go to the doctors cause he was just that out of the loop.

So i one hundred percent believe that when Ushijima felt himself have feelings for the first time during his second year he would copy everything he saw in romance mangas. He would blush when he finally told tendou about his feelings for you.

He definitely made a lot of oopsies in front of you because he genuinely has no idea how to talk to girls.

He gets sad seeing how you get scared when he walks by. His first real feelings of insecurity about his body.

Every morning he would make sure his uniformed was ironed and neat for you.

When he woke up from a wet dream about you he immediately apologized when he got to school. Obviously he gave you no details about why he was apologizing. He just walked up to you and said "i'm so sorry 😐".

But finally the day he tried to copy a scene from a j-drama was when he thought he lost you. He told tendou to try and spill his drink on you but to purposefully miss. That way you would lose your balance and he would catch you. Safe to say that isn't what happened. Tendou's chocolate milk was dumped all over you, and everyone in the school witnessed the first time Ushijima Wakatoshi "yelled" at tendou. However, telling tendou "this isn't what we planned," in a stern voice led you to believe the two of them were purposefully trying to embarrass you.

When Ushijima saw the tears well up in your eyes he felt a kind of pain that he hasn't felt in years. His heart hurt seeing how scared you looked at him. That night he went home and attempted to write his feelings out into a letter. Did it make a whole lot of sense? no, but it got his point through.

The next day Ushijima hadn't seen you at school, and his mom went into his room to collect dirty clothes. When she saw an envelope addressed to you she assumed her son forgot to take it. It was your birthday today if she remembers correctly. So his mother walks through the neighborhood and drops the envelope into your mail box cursing out her "stupid" son.

On that fateful day it was revealed that Ushijima Wakatoshi was just a silly boy that was so deeply in love.

Btw the best part of the letter was:

"you're like a volleyball. I get happy when i see you,"

[imaginesig]

Blue + Papaya

Pato O'Ward x reader

An F1 and an Indycar driver go on a social media brake....

ynln posted a two stories!

caption: (1) was I paying attention to the totally important sponsor lunch? Mmh yea totally (2) cheers to the absolute champ that is my man @/patriciooward

replies:

maxverstappen1

you're lucky they thought it was cute

old rich people love happy couples!

yea and the champagne you bought the table

hey the sponsored agreed to the next season so 🤷‍♀️

patriciooward

I cannot believe you

dont worry they found our love cute so they agreed

you're ridiculous

but you love me!

I do ❤️

user1

LMAO Y/N

user2

YOU WERE NOT WATCHING INDYCAR AT A WORK LUNCH

user3

y'all are literally my favorite couple ever!!!

patriciooward

liked by ynln, arrowmclaren, user43, and 823,209 others

patriciooward celebrating first 💪

tagged arrowmclaren, ynln

ynln THATS HOW WE DO IT

ynln LETS GO PAPAYA

user3 what a redbull pr nightmare

ynln IM SO PROUD

patriciooward I love you 🤍

ynln I love you too!!!!🤍

arrowmclaren That's our driver 👏🏆

user1 YESSS PATO!!!!

user2 a weekend full of Mclaren wins🧡

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patriciooward posted two stories!

captions: (1) lets go 13!!! (and Mclaren) (2) someone's moms a winner

replies

ynln

I love youuu

I love you tooooo

call me later!!

Will do!

landonorris

thanks for the support 😒

at least I mentioned you

bros before hoes or whatever they say

im ignoring you now

user1

stop this is too cute

user2

"someones mom" I'm gonna cry

ynln

liked by patriciooward, redbullracing, maxverstappen1, and 928,293 others

ynln love to hear that champagne pop!

tagged redbullracing

patriciooward You were incredible! Norbi and I are so proud!!

ynln I love and miss you guys 🤍

danielriccardo what a race!

redbullracing thats our girl 💪💪

ynln admin i love you

maxverstappen1 next time I'll get you

ynln sure sure, whatever you say

user1 great day for YnPato fans

user2 fr i love the double wins

user3 aww the flowers from Pato

user4 hes always on top of things

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twitter

ynln posted a story!

caption: off week(s) I love you already

replies

user1

where you going with that papaya Y/n?

user2

headed to america by any chance?

user3

airport fits always eat

indycar_updates

liked by user1, user5, user84, and 734,939 others

indycar_updates whether you know her from her career in F1 or as Pato O'Ward's girlfriend, a familiar face has been spotted in the paddock

tagged no one

user1 OMG OMG OMG

user2 THEY'RE BACK TOGETHER FINALLY

user3 its a great day or annoying people

user4 she looks so good!!

user5 i love that she has no papaya

user6 shes loyal to rb

load more

arrowmclaren

liked by ynln, user54, user2, and 928,293 others

arrowmclaren it was an honor to host our Mclaren buddies (and of course of fav Red Bull gets a shout out 😍)!!

tagged oscarpiastri, landonorris, ynln

elbaoward @/ynln you look so cute

ynln I'd be nowhere without your style guidance

redbullracing we lost our girl to the orange team

arrowmclaren its papaya actually

ynln dont fight, this isnt you admin

oscarpiastri thank you for the warm hospitality!

landonorris what a great weekend!

user1 welp looks like girlie came across some merch

user2 we lost her 😔

user3 ok ok but like thats Pato's personal jacket, not just some merch

user2 nevermind them i can be ok with this

load more

ynln

liked by maxverstappen1, patriciooward, user66, and 902,292 others

ynln you look so good in papaya baby 🧡

tagged: patriciooward

redbullracing come home the kids miss you

ynln otw admin 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

patriciooward ditto 😉🧡

ynln the only time I will ever be seen

elbaoward hands a little low 🤨

ynln heard loud and clear, won't happen again 🫡

user1 I love that she didnt post a single pic of herself in Mclaren merch/colors

user2 pr dream

user3 I love the first pic

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patriciooward

liked by ynln, oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 928,203 others

patriciooward great results+great company=perfect weekend 🧡🤍

tagged arrowmclaren, ynln, oscarpiastri, landonorris

ynln wonderful race!! I love you

patriciooward thank you for the support! I love you too

landonorris great race!

oscarpiastri it was wonderful meeting you!

arrowmclaren we agree, great company 😁

user1 Im beginning to think Mclaren photoshopped their photo of her, because Y/n hasn't been seen in papaya since 💀

user2 the second photo hand placement 🫠🫠

user3 my fav Mclaren boys all in one place

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ynln

liked by danielriccardo, elbaoward, user94, and 929,0292 others

ynln who doesn't love watching your best friends get married??

tagged patriciooward

patriciooward gorgeous girl 🤍

ynln pretty boy 🤍

user1 ugh they are so attractive

user2 im gonna cry the way he's looking at her in the second pic

user3 so when will y'all attend your own wedding??

user4 fr

elbaoward I second this

ynln LMAO ELBA GET OUT

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patriciooward posted a story!

caption: be my forever wedding date? @/ynln

replies

ynln

anytime baby 🤍

Time Skip

patriciooward

liked by elbaoward, user54, landonorris, and 829,292 others

patriciooward what a season! Thank you @/arrowmclaren for everything!

tagged arrowmclaren, ynln

ynln so so so proud!!!!

patriciooward 🤍

arrowmclaren can't wait for next year 👏👏

patriciooward right back at you!!

user1 next years champion- I can smell it

user2 lets go Pato!!!

user3 ugh this man is too fine

user4 that middle picture is actual goals

user5 my fav couple fr fr

load more

ynln

liked by elbaoward, user43, user92, and 928,029 others

ynln IndyCar, what a season

tagged: patriciooward

ynln alternate caption: save a horse

user1 LMAO Y/N

danielriccardo im blocking you

maxverstappen1 how would admin feel about this

pactriciooward 🤠

pactriciooward thank you for being here for it, near and far 🤍

ynln 🤍🤍

user2 that last photo ma'am 😫

user3 omg their captions match

load more

ynln

liked by danielriccardo, yukitsunoda0511, user25, and 981, 918 others

ynln last moments of peace before its back to work

tagged patriciooward

redbullracing we hope you enjoyed it!!🏕️

Patriciooward unplug and unwind

user1 awww Norbi

User2 I love this!!

User3 this is such a them thing to do

user4 right only Yn and Pato would go camping with his dog on a off week

Load more

patriciooward posted a story!

caption 🤍🤍, 🎶 Keep Driving by Harry Styles

Replies

User1

Orange backpack?? We caught her

User2

Enjoy offseason!!

User3

please travel with Y/n to f1 stuff!!!

f1_updates

liked by user82, user91, user 9, and 718,828 others

f1_updates: Pato O'Ward, Y/n L/n's boyfriend and Arrow Mclaren Driver, has posted several stories proving rumors he's in the paddock today dressed in Red Bull Blue...

tagged no one

User1 please not the selfie in the hospitality bathroom

User2 he may have blue on but we all see the nods to McLaren

user3 they’re both so stubborn abt their teams 💀

user4 OMG OMG OMG

user5 they are literally couple goals

User6 if he wanted to he would

Load more

ynln

liked by user3, danielriccardo, redbullracing, and 918,992 others

ynln the best company in the paddock this week! So happy to get P4, but rest assured I'll come back stronger next time

tagged redbullracing, patriciooward

user1 the last pic HELLO???

user2 they’re too cute

lilmhe glasses Y/n is too cute

Ynln love you lils 🫶🫶

Patriciooward 🤍

Ynln 🤍

user3 such good driving this weekend!!

user4 podium next week??

Load more

patriciooward

liked by Ynln, user42, arrowmclaren, and 982,992 others

patriciooward in a sea of blue I'll bring the papaya

Tagged Ynln, redbullracing

Ynln can’t take the McLaren out of the boy

patriciooward sorry not sorry babe!

redbullracing after our hospitality?? Were hurt

arrowmclaren @/mclaren we’ve trained him well

landonorris right on mate

user1 only Pato

user2 I swear 💀

Load more

Time Skip

ynln and patriciooward

liked by danielriccardo, landonorris, elbaoward, and 918,929 others

ynln 10.13.24

tagged no one

elbaoward my favorites!! I love you guys ❤️❤️

danielriccardo best night ever!

landonorris beautiful couple!!

User1 welp we now know where they’ve been

User2 STOP THEY GOT MARRIED

user3 this was not on my 2024 bingo card

user4 im gonna cry

user5 you know this was a party between all the F1 and indycar drivers 😭

user6 Y/n IS the life of the party

user7 what a power couple

load more

[claymoresword]

The Queen And Her Knight | Chp: 8

Alicent Hightower x Knight Fem!Reader

Summary: Alicent Hightower against her better judgement, falls in love with her sworn protector. Can she bear to fight her feelings or will she finally just give in?

Pairing: Alicent x Reader

Wordcount: 2.5k

Disclaimer: angst, masc/butch coded reader, alicent is a mess, aemond & y/n, otto is a scheming little prick

Note: honestly idk if it's writers block or just a general lack of motivation but i could not for the life of me convince myself to sit down and write this story lol i'm very sorry for the delay

this chapter doesn't move around too much as it focuses on the events directly after Storm's End. sorry if it's boring... but I really hope it isn't! ok that's it, love y'all

Taglist: @blackbirdv98 @flaiire1805 @alicentfangirl @memarrymilf @thegayassbit-ch @vantestark @hauntedfictionland @livinginafantasysposts @baddie-on-a-mission-xx @evolutionsglory @darthtargnister @dxrewclf @rozmrazaradelfinow @wlwfanfictionss @karsonromanoff

You are jolted out of your slumber with the feeling of Criston's rough hand on your shoulder. "Council meeting, Lord Commander. you have been summoned." 

In your half asleep state, you open your eyes just enough to squint at him, a grimace covers your features. 

"What? Why can't you take the watch, Cole?" You question, rubbing your face in frustration as you sit up in bed. 

You feel a breeze through the open window, it is still noticeably dark out. Nowhere near first light; your expression twists further in confusion. "What hour is it?"

Criston doesn't respond to your inquiry, his jaw is set in a way that always makes him appear mad at the world. "The dowager queen has sent for you, specifically." 

At the mention of Alicent, you quickly tug the blanket off your frame, rising from your bed. "Very well, Ser. I will be out in a moment, just let me dress."

═══════════════════════════════════════════

You observed as Otto Hightower paced the length of the small council chambers, his hands firmly clasped behind his back. His stare is pensive, but he is anxious– despite his meager attempt to conceal it.

Alicent wears a similar look on her face, although instead of pacing she repeatedly brings her fingers up to her lips, gnawing at the skin around her nails.

The sight makes you grimace. Every time you allow yourself to believe she has abandoned the horrid habit, it resurfaces ten fold.

Alicent would manage to chew her fingers until raw and bloody unless you put a stop to it.

Infuriatingly, now you can only afford to rest both hands on the hilt of your sword. You cannot reach out; too many eyes.

The last thing you want is to be seen touching the dowager queen without her leave.

"Your Grace." You chide instead, your voice only loud enough for Alicent to hear.

The dowager queen looks your way, her gaze distant before her eyes finally settle upon your own. 

Your narrowed gaze was enough for her to remove her hand from her mouth, clasping both of them over her belly instead, stifling the impulse.

Something has happened. But what, exactly? 

You want to ask, but the words soon die in your throat as the doors to the chambers open. 

Prince Aemond enters, dressed in his riding attire. His hand propped on the pommel of his longsword, his head held high.

You manage to catch the way Alicent stiffens at the sight of him.

Something is wrong, very wrong.

"Prince Aemond, I am certain we are all eager to find out what matter is so pressing that it requires our immediate audience at this time of night." Ser Tyland is first to address the obvious issue that's been left unspoken. 

The Lannister's annoyance represents that of the other men in the room. It is thinly veiled if not entirely unconcealed. 

Though to his luck, it somehow evades Aemond entirely. The prince decides to speak plainly.

"Lucerys Velaryon is dead." 

The room falls silent, safe from the crackling of firewood in the hearth nearby– the air so still you can hear the beating of your heart in your ears.

"How–" Ser Tyland tries but Aemond interjects.

"He died on dragonback. Vhagar and I happened upon him in the Stormlands." The Targaryen explains and your eyes widen.

You glance at Alicent on instinct, the dowager queen appears ready to faint, or wretch– you could not say. You remain standing beside her just in case.

Once again there is only silence, even from the Hand of the king himself. Otto Hightower's expression betrays nothing, and it confounds you.

There is certainly no hope for peace now, not when Aemond has just openly declared a war by killing the princess’ own son.

"I do not.. understand–" The words tumble out before you even fully realize you were speaking.

Aemond turns to you then, his expression betrays even less than his grandsire.

"His dragon provoked mine, there was not much I could do.” Aemond delivers the statement with such certainty and indifference, it sends a chill down your spine, destabilizing enough that you have to look elsewhere.

“My Prince, forgive me– As I understand it dragons do not attack others of their kind unless they feel threatened, much less one six times it's own size.” Maester Orwyle verbalizes your own thoughts exactly.

Aemond provoked the boy first.

“It does not matter. The bastard got what was coming to him.” Aemond snaps in return, you observe as Alicent rubs her own forearm, an effort to soothe herself. You notice, whilst the men around her remain oblivious.

The room is flooded with a sudden sense of trepidation and despair.

“The princess will want blood for this.” Orwyle states grimly.

“That she will. and when she comes for it we will be ready.” Otto finally speaks, he steps forward, bracing his hands firmly on the wood-carved table.

“We can no longer expect the princess or her lord husband to bend their knees willingly. They will attempt to take my grandson’s rightful seat by force. We must strengthen our defenses.” He bellows, glancing at every man in the room. 

Eventually Otto looks to you, but pays his own daughter no mind.

“I have the largest dragon.” Aemond remarks proudly, like the green boy that he is. 

Having a dragon does not make you invincible, lad. You would have warned him, if you had been alone. Afterall, he did listen to you.. most times.

You let out a quiet sigh. The young prince knows nothing of warfare, so naturally he is giddy at the prospect. 

His grandsire remains the only one with authority to openly address his statement, and his next words to Aemond are a risk. “Yes, and they are not to forget that.”

“We must first secure the castle, no one unauthorized goes in or out without my leave.”

“Lord Commander, double the amount of guards in the royal quarters. The king and queen's chambers especially.” Otto orders, his gaze now fixed on you.

With what men? You find yourself wondering.

More than half the kingsguard has since fled to join Rhaenyra's cause while your own men grow restless and uncooperative the longer your father took to declare his support for Aegon.

You don't dare utter your grievances out loud, simply nodding at the command.

“Very well, M'lord.”

Otto turns away from you to continue discussing future strategies with the rest of the council members. 

It all comes easily to him, as though he had been planning them for some time. As if this was all a part of a larger scheme. 

You foolishly mistook Otto's excitement for anxiety. This realization feels so macabre, you could laugh.

The men of the council continue to listen whether they want to or not, whilst you remain standing by the dowager queen. Alicent grows more uneasy by the minute as she listens to her father openly laying out strategies and tactics.

It is all happening so quickly.

Alicent fiddles with her seven pointed star necklace again before rubbing her neck anxiously. She goes to gnaw at her finger but stops herself. 

The queen is unraveling right before your eyes, and the sight makes you ache. 

Like a pot of steaming water just about to boil over; your lover's next move is sudden.

Alicent takes large strides towards the exit, the men of the council rise from their seats abruptly to see her off, and you fall in next to her dutifully.

“Mother–” Aemond calls out to her, but Alicent does not look back.

═══════════════════════════════════════════ 

Alicent doesn't allow herself to pause until she reaches her bedchambers, Ser Criston inclines his head at the sight of the queen, stepping aside to let her through.

“Return to your quarters, Cole, I will guard Her Grace.” You command, and Ser Criston nods without much reproach. 

Most likely eager for the opportunity to return to his bedchambers and resume his slumber.

You replace his spot by the door as he went on his way, soon the knight turns a corner and out of sight. The clanging of his armor grew faint, eventually dimming into nothing.

“Y/n.” Your name echoes through the walkway. 

It is Alicent calling for you before the door to her chambers gets the chance to shut fully. Her sweet voice, frail and weary with tears unshed.

You swiftly step inside at the invitation, habitually bolting the door behind you. As you turn, the dowager queen practically throws herself into your arms. It doesn't take you long to return her embrace, your chest constricts as you hear her sob against your shoulder.

“Oh, my love–” You coax, caressing her hair with a much needed tenderness, but you don't get to do it for long as Alicent soon breaks away from you to speak.

“Aemond, he came to me first– woke me to admit what he'd done.” She starts, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, only for more tears to fall.

“But it seemed as though he expected me to celebrate him for it. He looked so proud of himself.” Alicent recounts, her hand now shifts over her belly, as though actively suppressing the urge to be sick.

You watched as she began to pace the floors.

“The indignities of his childhood.. his want for revenge, it has blinded him–”

“It has blackened his heart, twisted him into someone I don't even recognize.” Alicent declares bitterly.

She gnaws at her cuticle again before turning to look at you. Your silence only makes her grow expectant, as though hoping you'll dispute her words. Perhaps even agree with them, but you find yourself incapable of doing either.

Aemond no longer appears the same boy you grew to care for. The boy you have trained and looked out for since he was not much taller than your knee.

A solemn fact, but one that is true.

Even so, you can hardly believe the young prince is capable of cold blooded murder– surely, it must have been an accident, a terrible lapse in judgment.

Dragons have never been so easily tamed, least of all the large and ancient beast Aemond commands.

Vhagar must have acted on her own. 

Yes, in the presence of the council Aemond has to pretend. He pretends so his dignity is spared.

-

Alicent mistakes your silence for agreement, frustration and helplessness quickly overwhelm her.

“What is to become of my sons, y/n? The rotten fruits of my womb.. They are both monsters.” Alicent sobs, placing the blame entirely on herself– a thing she does often and mercilessly.

Another unjust habit.

You feel inclined to disagree. It is not fair that Alicent bears the burden all on her own, it does no good to anyone for her to believe these things. 

You realize that your kindness will most likely not be of much use to her now– but you vow to try anyway. “Most men are, Your Grace.. You mustn't– you cannot blame yourself.”

You allow yourself a deep breath as Alicent meets your gaze; she is listening.

“We are a product of our parents, our mothers, that much is true. Still, we are our own person, we make our choices and we live with them.” You approach Alicent steadily, as though not to startle her.

“Aemond made a choice, my love.” You affirm, cupping her face with both hands, silently relishing at the feeling of her seeking out your embrace once more.

Alicent remains silent for a prolonged moment, she welcomes the feeling of your hand smoothing down her back.

“He should have never gone to Storm's End without an escort. Death and destruction awaits anyone who dares mount those feral beasts.” Alicent maintains her revulsion for dragons, now more than ever, vitriol laces her every word.

“This could have all been avoided.” She decides, forlorn. 

“Now that poor boy is dead– and Rhaenyra, she– I gave her my word, peace in the realm if she accepted my terms, and I have betrayed that.” Alicent hugs you tighter, and you lift her head off your shoulder calmly as to guide her face towards your own.

“Alicent, what has happened cannot be undone. I dread the consequences as much as you do, but no good can come from blaming yourself.” You render, still you decide to continue even as the older woman averts her gaze.

“There was no way to anticipate this. I am certain prince Aemond himself did not plan on meeting Lucerys with his dragon.”

“Sometimes things simply happen. For better or worse.” You finish, in truth, unsatisfied with yourself. 

Words are wind, there is only so much you can say in a situation as dire as this, in the face of impending war.

“It is not your fault. Do you hear me?” You insist, the pad of your thumb caressing Alicent's cheek as you catch a glimpse of her warm brown eyes.

At last, she hears your words and she accepts them. Alicent nods.

“Not my fault.” The dowager queen finally utters in return, uncharacteristically withdrawn and almost docile in your arms.

You continue to handle her carefully, as though she were made of glass. “That's right.” Relieved, you place a lingering kiss upon Alicent's forehead.

A welcomed stillness fills the air as you hold each other, in the quiet of the night, but as with most good things as of late– it is short lived.

A knock on the door startles you both, a familiar voice can be heard from the other side.

“Mother?” Aemond says as he attempts to enter, but the bolt you had placed on the handle prevents the door from budging.

Alicent escapes your touch, she threads her fingers through her auburn locks in visible distress. She makes the effort to step even further away from the door as Aemond knocks again.

“Tell him to leave me, please. I cannot bear to look at him just now.” Alicent pleads in a frantic whisper, and you nod, gesturing with your hand, at an attempt to remind her to calm herself.

As Alicent moves to her bed, you straighten out your doublet, approaching the door. Subsequently, you retract the long wooden panel barring it shut.

Aemond's features are twisted in visible confusion as your eyes meet. You school your own expression in turn, ignoring the way in which your shoulders tense at the sight of him. 

“The dowager queen is abed, my prince. She is not to be disturbed.” You explain with an intended air of indifference and Aemond simply grimaces. He stubbornly tries to peek into the room as you remain blocking his view; to no avail.

“I don't understand, why does my mother not wish to see me?” He asks, his growing frustration evident.

“She is abed, the hour is late.” You repeat, not unkindly, though your hand rests on the pommel of your sword on instinct.

Aemond searches your face, and soon his own expression twists abruptly, bristling when he finds nothing within your gaze that would work in his favor. 

The young prince just as quickly dons a look that fills you with a familiar sense of unease.

He turns on his heels, his cape flourishes as he storms through the dimly lit gallery, eventually disappearing into the shadows.

Aemond Targaryen left for Storm's End a brilliant and obliging boy, and he returned a Kinslayer.

[nohaijiachi]

I got randomly recommended this video by YT and wrote a ginormous comment in response because I have no self control, apparently, so I thought I might as well also share my thoughts here in regard to whatever is going with THIS FUCKING SMILE

(under a cut to not clog y'alls dashboards)

(the first part of the comment here is a direct response to some of the ideas put forth in the video, it is very short so give it a quick watch for more context if you want)

Imo it's not necessary to look into overcomplicated theories that rely too much on off screen shenanigans to explain the smile, for how amusing the idea of them having swapped during the kiss is (like, the kind of stuff I won't want to be actually canon, but I'll be very happy to see explored in fan fics lol)

I think to fully explain that smile we have to take in consideration multiple factors:

This show is very purposeful in what it does and doesn't, well... show. That last shot is very long and I think the fact that Aziraphale's and Crowley's expressions in the aftermath of their disastrous break up is shown in such a manner tells us a LOT about the state of mind they might be at the start of S3, and the obstacles they'll have to face. Aziraphale doesn't immediately smile, rather he seems to look almost shell-shocked for most of the shot; it's clear (to me at least lol) that the quiet ride up the elevator is finally giving him some desperately needed time to fully digest everything that happened, because too much has happened in an extremely short amount of time, and we all know Aziraphale doesn't do well with speed lol.

But, for how much he can sometimes be a complete moron, he is smart, and all he needs are just those seconds of quiet to properly ponder on everything, on the choices made and the ramifications of said choices, and that's how we get to smile-- I'll delve into what I think Aziraphale is going through in his mind in more details later, because I also think it's necessary to focus a bit on Crowley's own expression, since the both of them are so intrinsically linked that the narrative cannot make sense without taking the both of them into account.

Crowley's expression is much more static and doesn't change the way Aziraphale's does; he looks profoundly tired in ways we've never seen him before. I don't think he's giving up on Aziraphale, and I fully believe the fact that he stood there and waited for Aziraphale to disappear in the elevator, the both of them sharing that last look, was a quiet message: He'll never give up on Aziraphale, he'll be there, waiting. But wait is all he can do for Aziraphale, now, because he can't follow where Aziraphale is going.

For how messy and full of heightened emotions the confession + kiss are, I think actually denying Aziraphale's request was a HUGE step forward for Crowley's character. He's never been able to deny Aziraphale, he always went back to him after every fight, and we all know how stupidly whipped for Aziraphale he is and how he'd empty the ocean with a spoon if Aziraphale asked him nicely-- But to actually put his foot down and say "no, I cannot do this for you" when asked to all but renounce the person he is now? Especially with how Aziraphale is all but begging him openly? That's a huge step, and something I think Crowley desperately needs to mature as a person (or, well, person-shaped being). We all love how Aziraphale has him wrapped around his little finger I'm sure, but we also all know that if they truly want to build a strong, healthy relationship they also both need to be able to keep their individuality and to put forth adequate boundaries about what they are willing to do for each other within reason.

Asking Crowley to come back to being an angel when he's made blatantly clear for six thousand bloody years how much he despises Heaven is not a 'within reason' request, innit?

So, yeah, for how heartbreaking the break-up was, in a sense Crowley needs it. They both do. They both need time apart to figure their own shit out, dismantle all those unhealthy habits they had to adopt in order to be with one another as safely as they possibly could while still 'employed', and then come back together with a clearer mind and a whole deal stronger than before, both as individuals and as a couple.

And I think how tired and downtrodden Crowley looks in that last shot is a precursor to this process, just as much as Aziraphale's smile is... So, let me get back to our favorite angel and what I personally think is going on with him.

I think to properly contextualize that smile we need to look at not just the happening of those infamous last fifteen minutes, but of S2 as a whole, and what Aziraphale does in it.

So, what is Aziraphale doing during S2?

At the start he seems to be more or less comfortably settled in his current life; he's as happy as ever doing what he's always done, enjoying humanity's creativity with his books and his music and his food and drinks, seemingly content to be puttering about in his bookshop (which is a stark contrast with Crowley's homelessness and his kinda adrift and depressed attitude). Of course then Jim!Gabriel throws a wrench right into that, but imo I think there was a lot more going on behind the facade of Aziraphale's well ingrained habits.

Sure, he still has all of his familiar comforts and his routine, but from the moment we see him interact with Crowley I saw a deep restlessness emerge in him: The panicked look he launches Crowley when Nina asks him about his 'naked man friend', the way he speaks with Crowley with all those 'our' he uses, the blatant way he keeps reaching over and touching Crowley-- To me that suggests that Aziraphale is clearly not as happy as he seems to be on a superficial glance. He clearly wants more with Crowley, wants to bring their relationship to the next step, but because the both of them are so deeply entrenched in their unhealthy coping mechanisms and habits and their inability to openly communicate it doesn't even occur to Aziraphale to just... You know. Take the first step, actually say something about it. So he just keeps throwing bait after bait in the water, hoping Crowley will bite and be the one taking the initiative as he's always done, finally allowing Aziraphale to accept said initiative, this time around.

Of course, we all see that Crowley doesn't take any first step, which is probably something deeply frustrating for Aziraphale at a subconscious level. That's how we get the ball; sure, on the face of it it was Aziraphale's way to make Nina and Maggie fall in love, but... Was it, really? Let's be real, for how entirely believable it is that Aziraphale makes up the lie about Nina and Maggie's love to cover for their miracle is, since we've seen him being anxious around other angels, I don't think for a second that had Aziraphale just stopped and spent three minutes thinking about it he wouldn't have found a way to convince Muriel that Nina and Maggie were, in fact, in love, especially with how 'green' Muriel is about humans.

I fully believe that Aziraphale is not properly thinking during S2, period. He's frustrated by his inability to bring his and Crowley's relationship to what he wants it to be, and that frustration and single-minded objective is utterly obfuscating his thought process. There are plenty of moments he seemed almost manic, imo, which I read as another sign about his 'impaired' (allow me the term) state of mind as of S2.

So, yes, the ball: On the face of it something to actually turn his lie to the Archangels into truth, but deeper down, perhaps almost unconsciously, I think Aziraphale sees the ball as a way to finally make him and Crowley happen. That fact that he's taking pointers about romance from human literature is blatant, and obviously he truly does believe the ball will be THE way to make love bloom.

If you stop and think about it, the ball scene is terrifying. These people are being manipulated to play the perfect background parts to make, what is in Aziraphale's mind, the height of romance atmosphere happen. The fact we get a juxtaposition with Nina's "what the F is going on, am I losing my mind???" rightful attitude underlines this. And I truly believe Aziraphale isn't exerting said manipulation with intent, but rather doing so subconsciously, because he's just so fixated on the idea of having finally the perfect set-up to have Crowley as he desires that he is influencing everything around him. After all, we all know they both have the tendency of making things happen the way they want simply by thinking that's how things are supposed to happen.

And again, he's so manic and giddy when he asks Crowley to dance, his ass is not LISTENING. He literally needed a brick thrown through a window to snap out of it.

So, in the present we have an Aziraphale who , in his own way, is trying to take the initiative, come out with plans. There is a moment that I think might have slipped under the radar of a lot of people but that's frightfully important about who Aziraphale is at this point in the story, and who he will need to become: "I have a plan," Aziraphale said to Crowley during the stare down with the demons outside of the bookshop after the ruined ball; Crowley didn't even seem to have registered that sentence at all, because his mind is already projected forward and going a mile a minute about what to do to keep both the humans and Aziraphale safe in this situation.

Crowley, who loves to swoop in and save Aziraphale, doing what he's always done to keep his angel safe, even to the detriment of their relationship with one another... And Aziraphale, who adores playing the part of the damsel in distress in turn, is actually telling Crowley that *he has a plan*.

That's not something to take lightly, methinks. That's very much just another sign that Aziraphale's individuality is struggling, trying to emerge through Aziraphale's anxiety and doubts and fears and deeply ingrained habits. Aziraphale's cognitive dissonance in regards to heaven, and his shaken faith in God are huge motivators of his actions, and in the grand scheme of things the scant few years he had away from under the oppressive thumb of heaven is nothing. It was barely any time at all in the face of the eternity of an immortal life spent under that oppression, and yet we are already seeing little glimpses of Aziraphale's rebellious side struggling to get fully free.

I think these little glimpses inform us at great lengths about the evolution Aziraphale's character will go through in S3, and greatly explains that strange smile right at the end; in my opinion that smile isn't the smile of someone who's trying to convince himself that he's ok, or realizing that Crowley loves him (he knew already, they both knew and have known for a long time, their inability to properly express those feelings was their downfall, but I don't think either of them has doubted even for a second when it comes to how much they love one another). In my opinion that smile is the smile of someone who is steeling himself for what he envisions in his future; equal parts old-sedated anxiety and yet determination to actually enact plans he's surely concocting in his brilliant little mind. That's the smile of someone who has just realized that not only they can, but that they need to do something, and you can damn well be sure they won't be sitting and twiddling their thumbs waiting to be saved, but they'll be the one saving themselves and everybody else along with 'em, this time.

Just as Crowley needs to actually spend some time define himself as himself, and not just in relation to Aziraphale, Aziraphale needs to spend some time shedding all those fears and doubts that are weighing him down, and emerge the other side someone much more self-assured and ready to do what he thinks is right without all the hesitations that have indirectly been strengthened by Crowley; in a way, by allowing Aziraphale an out with his 'temptations', Crowley had been feeding into those hesitations, and had been holding Aziraphale back from fully maturing, even if not done on purpose, obviously. Imo is very important for Aziraphale's character that he comes to realize that he doesn't need those excuses Crowley gifted him to keep doing what he thinks is right, that he actualizes his own morality properly, and enacts on it.

I don't have the faintest clue about what is going to happen in S3, but I do fully believe the above paragraph is what Aziraphale and Crowley's respective character arcs will focus on. And once they'll come back together they'll be the most power couple that has ever power coupl-ed, and the Metatron will have no clue about what is about to hit him >:)

[artists-ally]

Can you please write some more Azriel smut with his mate thank you !!!

{Bow} Reader x Azriel

Oh babes, you ask and you shall receive. Y'all went fucking BANANAS with my last Az smut, so here ya go you filthy sluts (i'm the filthiest slut there is i write this shit) Also you cannot convince me that Az isn't a dom. Enjoy!! Title from this song

Word Count: 2,869

Warnings: smut, spanking, spitting, choking, praise kink, breeding kink, possessive behavior, bondage, dom/sub vibes

Tagging: @librafairy @needylilgal022

Summary: Azriel goes a little feral after the mating bond snaps into place.

~~~~~

I knew it was going to happen. I could feel it coming. Just one of those once-in-a-lifetime feelings when you just know something is going to happen. There wasn’t anything I could do to warn Az since he was on the other end of the continent in Illyria. 

But my bones buzzed when he told me he was coming home. It was just a caress down the bond, a flicker of his shadow around my hand to let me know, but it was intense. I didn’t know if he knew or not, but I certainly did. 

“Okay, why are you pacing around?” Mor snapped me out of my thoughts. 

“I think it’s going to happen. Like today,” I said through a hurried breath. Mor squealed and I flinched, the sound doing nothing to help the vein pulsing in my head. 

“Oh my gods oh my gods I cannot believe it!” She jumped up and down. “Finally.”

“Hey,” I frowned slightly. “It’s not our fault. And we both agreed we’d wait until it felt right to pursue it. Who knew it would take two and a half years.”

“Can I say how proud of you I am for waiting? I could never be that patient,” Mor grabbed me by my shoulders. “I am so happy for you, Yn. No one in Prythian deserves this more than you two.” “Thanks,” I smiled sweetly, taking her hands in mine. I inhaled sharply and let it out. “What do I do?”

“You need to make him something to eat,” Mor hurried out, dragging me out of the living room of the Townhouse and into the kitchen. “What’s his favorite thing to eat?”

I thought for a moment, stuffing down the urge to say me and trying to think of a legit response. “He has always loved those pork dumplings I made for Solstice one year.”

“Perfect,” Mor ran around and grabbed the ingredients I listed off. “Let's make this the most memorable meal of his life!”

For about an hour I kneaded and folded the little dumplings into half circles, filling them with pork and vegetables before sealing them and dropping them in a pan. I was filled with so much excitement that the normally terrifying process of splattering oil didn't faze me. It was so hard to think about anything other than Azriel and what we’d do later tonight. Hopefully, anyway. 

I remember what Feyre told me about her and Rhys. What Cassian said about him and Nesta. That it had been a fury of teeth and tongues and touches. That there wasn’t any time to be wasted. The want. The primal need for each other and how brutal it was. But how satisfying and soul-bonding it was. 

Quite literally.

I finished the last of them up, plating the others for when he got home. He was getting closer; the shadow he always left me with was writhing between my fingers, circling around my wrist. 

“Okay, I will make sure everything is tidy and then I’m gone. And I will make sure no one comes within a three mile radius of this place for the next week. Or until you send word Azriel isn’t going to rip someone's head off.”

I rolled my eyes, “We’ll be fine. He’s almost here so get out.” “Good luck,” she winked, disappearing behind the corner. The front door opened and closed and I watched her winnow away. 

Why am I so nervous? It isn’t like it’s our first date all over again. He has seen the most intimate parts of my body, the most intricate parts of my mind and yet I was shivering with anticipation. Not nerves– excitement. 

I can hear the mighty beat of his wings as he approaches, and I see him land in the back garden, pushing his wind-blown hair off his forehead. My heart is at a furious pace. Gods he looks… it’s like I’m seeing him all over again. For the first time. All those thoughts and feelings rushing into me. 

There isn’t a fucking doubt in my mind that this is going to happen. 

Azriel draws open the back door and turns his head to the left, then to the right to find me motionless in the kitchen. “Yn…”

He says my name in the same breathless way he has since he learned what it was years ago. Our eyes lock and he shuts the door behind him. Azriel doesn’t waste a single second, scooping me up and drawing me in tight against his chest. He smells of the slight salt and lemon of the Sidra, but deep down his natural, rugged scent washes over me. 

“I have to stop taking such long trips to the Camp,” Azriel grumbles a laugh, pressing his lips to the top of my head. He takes a deep breath, then releases it. When I don’t respond– or chuckle alongside him– he draws back. “Yn?”

All I can do is look at him. His eyes are impossibly green at this moment. All the flecks of gold and amber igniting them. My chest is tight and the edges of my control are slipping. 

He furrows his brows, “Is everything…” And the words die on his tongue. 

It’s like Prythian tilts and slides into the sea. Down down down we go with it. I might’ve actually gasped with the crack that formed in my chest, breath still in my throat. 

It’s not the shimmering gold or tether of silver Feyre and Nesta had described. It is an inky black tendril of shadow that I can see, that I can feel, as clear as day. And right there, tied to the other end, is Azriel. Mate mate mate is the only hum I feel besides the roar of hope. Of promise. Of forever. 

Azriel shudders a breath, staggering a step back, eyes blinking as rapidly as his chest moves. His hands are digging into the sides of my arms. “Y-Yn-”

“I feel it,” I finished his unasked question. I nod again, forcing myself to believe that this is actually happening. He nods back, eyes never leaving mine. “I thought that I could feel it coming. Like- like this huge build up in my chest and… almost like a doorway? Like I could see the door but didn’t quite know how to unlock it.”

Azriel doesn’t say anything for a long few beats. “Mates…”

I nod. “Mates.”

It’s like saying it outloud solidified it because only after that did the burn for him become unbearable. It was untamed and wild and feral, just like Feyre had said it would be. Before we wrecked everything in the kitchen, I dropped his hands from my body and walked to the counter. 

I held out the plate of homemade dumplings and presented them to Azriel. His eyes looked from the plate and back up to me. 

He looked hungry. Not for the dumplings– most definitely not for the dumplings. I wonder what it feels like for him. If he’s as desperate as I am. As eager and impatient. If he can barely stand the two feet between us like I do. 

Azriel’s fingers are trembling as he plucks one of the dumplings off the plate and brings it to his mouth. In any other scenario I’d find it weird as he doesn’t look away while he chews… but his scent is driving me in-fucking-sane and I can't look away. 

I think it’s safe to say that he doesn’t taste it, practically swallowing it whole. The plate of dumplings are on the floor the next second and a gasp leaves my mouth. His hand is fisted in my hair, mouth covering mine. 

Fuck me. Feyre wasn’t joking about everything feeling different. About feeling better. 

I pressed onto my toes and looped my arm around the back of his neck. He grabbed the backs of both my thighs and hauled me onto his hips. 

“Mate,” Azriel growled out. “My mate, my mate.”

My ass hit the counter and the canister of spoons and utensils crashed to the floor. I went to look, but Az gripped my throat and forced me to look back at him. He looked wild. Like pure instinct had taken over. 

“Az-”

“You’re fucking mine,” he spoke through clenched teeth. “All fucking mine.”

“All yours, Az,” I breathed out, his thumb pulling down my bottom lip. I sucked on it, tears springing into my eyes when he shoved it further down my throat. I watched the grin spread across his face. “All mine,” I said with equal possession. 

“Only you have that power now, Yn. The power to bring me to my knees. I do not bend to anyone except you. Always you. Forever you.”

My heart swelled before his lips were back on mine, tongue curling with mine in haste. His hands worked their way down my thighs, spreading them apart. I shuddered at the feeling of him against my core, cock already hard and pulsing against me. 

His scent– lightning hot with a touch of cinnamon– cascaded around me, blooming into the air and making my body react in a way I didn’t know it could. I scratched at the edges of his fighting leathers, desperate for his body against mine. Azriel reached for the straps, sliding them through the buckles with five centuries of experience and effortless precision. 

The material gave away and fell to the floor and there was nothing but his tattooed skin in my hands. Nails clawing up his back and shoulders, I couldn’t get closer if I tried. I needed closer. I Needed him inside me like I needed water or the sun. 

My body was thinking for me, hands fumbling with my bottoms as he ripped off his. Even as much as I didn’t want to draw away from his mouth, I couldn’t help the curiosity to look at him. 

I dipped my eyes down, seeing a few beads of slick slip from his body, coating the tip of him. I reached down, even more desperate for a taste than I had been for the feeling of his lips on mine. 

Az watched with a predatory look etched in his eyes. I gathered it and brought my finger to my mouth, the taste of him settling in my bones. He tasted how he always did, but there was just something more satisfying about it now. The confirmation that for the rest of our lives I would be able to have every part of him. Whenever I wanted. 

He couldn’t wait. And I didn’t blame him. In another heartbeat I was flipped over and on my stomach, knees knocking into the cabinet below. His hands tore the rest of the material from my body and the scraps gave away. 

He was panting. I’ve never heard him be this vocal. Or this destructive. “Hold still.” He commanded, pressing on the middle of my back to get me to stop squirming.

I obeyed. 

His hands spread my ass apart and I heard his tongue working in his mouth. I gasp when he spits onto my already soaked cunt, spreading it around with his fingers. He lands a crack to my ass with his palm next and I grit my teeth together, whining when he does it again. 

“Fucking mine,” He snarls, and I feel the tip of his chock slide over my clit. There is the familiar sting that comes with his size as he presses all the way in, not giving me the time to adjust like he normally would. 

But Cauldron damn me if I actually cared. I need him inside me. Need to feel every inch of his length until I couldn’t feel him at all. 

My body was vibrating, as was his. He pulled out and rocked back in, nails dragging down my spine. He let out a dark laugh, void of any real tenderness. “Gods I am going to fucking ruin you, Yn. Yeah you like that don’t you? Fuck.”

I cried out. My body was on fire. Every single hair on my skin stood up on end as he claimed me. Every part of my mind and body and soul melded together with Azriels with each snap of his hips. 

It was not soft. Or sweet. Or comfortable. We were both satisfying an ancient need for each other in every way possible. That door with his shadow leading me was wide open, and it was like I could see into his mind. Through his eyes, I looked at my marked body.

The noises tore through me as did my release. I convulsed around him, arching up and into the momentum as he rocked into me. In seconds I was lifted off the counter, still shuddering around his cock when we landed on the floor. 

Azriel hauled my ass into the hollow of his hips and hit places so deep inside me I didn’t know how to breathe. 

He was a panting, shaking mess behind me. 

“Mine,” he murmured against my neck, teeth grazing the skin. “You’re doing such a good job, taking my cock like that.”

I whimpered as he forced my hips to meet his. He leaned over my body and I felt a few drops of sweat trickle onto my skin. He pushed my chest flat against the floor and I wasn’t entirely sure that my spine wasn’t going to break with the force. With one hand pinning my shoulder, the other ripped my hair back, creating the most painful yet pleasurable angle. 

Shadows whirled around my body, ghosting every inch to stimulate me beyond anything I thought possible. All reason left my mind. I was his, and he was mine. His body, his soul… it was all mine. He was giving himself to me, just like I was giving myself to him. 

Every push of his body into mine drew sounds I didn’t know we could make. At this angle I could feel how much bigger he was than me. Knowing that if he wanted to he could easily over power my body without lifting a finger. 

For a second time my body overtook my mind, leaving me no choice to follow its lead. I shook and cried out, chanting his name over and over again as I came a second time in only a few minutes. 

“Fucking look at you,” Azriel said, easing up on his lod of my hair. “Taking my cock like it’s nothing. You are doing such a good job, Yn. Gonna fucking breed you. Aww, you’d like that, hmm? I can feel you clenching, feel how much you want it.”

I nodded, not able to form any words. 

Azriel turned me over on my back and pinned my knees to the floor with his shadows. That same darkness curled around my wrists and sealed them above my head while his hands worked my nipples, my clit. 

I couldn’t thrash even if I wanted to. His teeth left marks along my chest, the muscles in his shoulders rippling as he forced his cock into me at a brutal pace. 

“Oh fuck,” he whimpered. “F-fuck yes, Gods you feel so fucking hot.”

I did my best to tighten around him, and judging by the way his hips stuttered, I did a good job. The muscles around his ribs and abdomen flared, the veins in his arms pushing to the surface. 

“I can’t-” he heaved for a breath, mumbling curses and pleas. “Can’t hold on anymore.”

“Let go,” I beg, new tears spilling down my cheeks. “Fill me up.”

Azriel was a mess of gasping breaths and praise as he focused all his motion. Every hard ridge of his body was constricted and convulsing with power as he cursed again, head dipped low, breath fanning over my chest and neck. 

My mind melted as I felt the bond snap into place even deeper. There had been a mental connection earlier, but this was the physical side. Azriel’s front draped over mine as he came deep inside me, his thighs shaking as he fucking into me over and over and over, cum trickling out with each new push of his cock into my aching cunt. 

“That’s a good girl… there you go,” he slurred his words, drunk off the feeling of his release. I could feel it as if it was my own. Feel his claim on my body as if it was my own. “Take it all. All fucking mine. Such a good mate. Taking all my cum so fucking good.”

I moaned, fingers and toes tingling as he took his weight off my chest and sat up. Sweat gleamed his body. My eyes were blurry, but I could still see the need in his eyes. 

I swallowed, the high of it all settling in. His hands roamed over my body, up around the creases of my still bound thighs, and up my sides. 

After a few more short gasps, his hand was gripping my chin. “I am not letting you out of the fucking bed until no one is able to tell our scents apart again. Everyone is gonna know that you’re mine. My mate, and everyone will know I am yours.”

[thebookofcarol]

Daryl and Carol back together again

And everything is right with the world again. So now that y'all seen the reunion, we can finally talk about it.

There's something primal, raw and heart-wrecking about the way Daryl just stops cause he cannot believe his eyes, drops his weapons, fuck it, he doesn't need anything, except to run to that one person who means everything to him - Carol. Thanks Norman for letting us know, this is exactly how you meant to play it.

It may or may not get long, so more spoilers after the jump...

That reunion scene is everything to me, and tbh at first, I was emotional but thought there was something missing and it hadn't topped the Terminus reunion for me, BUT after watching it a few more times, and in context, I really can't pick which one is my fav. I just can't. I can't even explain it, but there's something so real and palpable about it, that I didn't quite feel with the Terminus one. I guess this one was more serious, more emotional, deeper somehow... I'll be going around in circles and still powerless to translate my feelings into words. So BOTH, I'll pick BOTH. BOTH IS GOOD.

With the reunion out of the way, I feel like Daryl is constantly trying to make Carol understand he did not give up on going home, while Carol is confused and wondering what the heck happened for him to have created that connection with the people in France (Isa and Laurent) in such a short period of time.

Daryl tries to explain, he sounds downright apologetic to her. He says stuff like he didn't mean to care so much, he kept trying to get home to HER, things just happened when he and Isa just tried to help each other with Laurent's acting as the glue that held them together. That is all too familiar for Carol because that's how she ended up married to Zeke. But the way Daryl is trying to explain things doesn't sound at all like he's telling his best friend he fell in love, it feels like a cheating husband apologizing to his wife for his transgressions. I'm not saying Daryl betrayed Carol - HE DID NOT. However, the way he is acting is as if he is guilty, so what I think is that Daryl realized he's betraying his own feelings, and that's why he needs to explain it to Carol. Obviously, it all goes over her head since she states Daryl loved Isa, to which he stays absolutely quiet, just looking at her, and giving her the silliest little smirk ever. LIKE this woman is completely oblivious to what he is trying to convey. And it's so hilariously infuriating Carol of her to do that.

ANYWAYS, all the foreshadowing with Didi and Theo, how they found each other late in life, and are currently living happily together (not married!), just the two of them, living for each other. It's beautiful, it's romantic, and I believe it's exactly the type of happy ending EP's Norman and Melissa have in mind for Carol and Daryl's endgame. No matter who they are to each other, romantic or not, this is how they find happiness.

AND FINALLY. There's time for Carol and Daryl to make small talk, and they instantly fall back to that comfortable back and forth. It only feels different because the Carol and Daryl we used to know could not afford the time to just talk about wants, needs, school and traveling the world while on the main show. Now, they can just be themselves, have much more room to talk, talk about meaningless stuff that show us a bit more of who they are. And that's wonderful to me.

[omegapropaganda]

🎉1k Kudos🎉

Y'all! I cannot believe this! Burnt Honey has over a thousand kudos! To celebrate there's a sneak peak below the cut of some light smut from Chapter 10! (like always with the sneak peaks there is a chance of things changing as I finish the chapter since this is still very much a work in progress)

I cannot express enough how much I appreciate every single one of y'all and the response to this story 🥲 And I'm super thankful that y'all have been so patient while I focus on all my personal life things happening. I hope that within the next few weeks I'll be back home and fingers crossed have time to work on finishing this chapter ♡

“Seillean,” Soap’s voice was sweet and soft as he spoke into your ear. “Can Ah have a kiss?” 

It was a bit of a stretch to angle your head just right to catch Soap’s lips, but it was totally worth it. The kiss was a little rough, his chapped lips scraping slightly over your sensitive skin, but you didn’t mind. He tasted just as good as he smelled and you wondered why it had taken you so long to kiss the beta.

You let Soap dominate the kiss, content to simply exist in this space of want and acceptance created by your pack. You sent up a quick prayer of thanks to whatever power was in control of your life for putting you in the path of these two men.

Without them there’s no telling where you would be. You never would’ve been able to stand up to Graves without their support. The thought made your eyes sting with unshed tears and your omega was scratching at the surface wanting to take comfort in its pack. You let it out without a second thought.

In an instant it was met again by the alpha and the beta, joining together with playful joy.

Your neck was starting to ache at the odd angle you were holding to continue kissing Soap, and the novelty of Ghost’s lazy licks against your armpit had worn off. You wanted more, and you wanted it now.

You pushed at the top of Ghost’s head, trying to get him to move, but all you got was a warning growl from the alpha.

“Bad dog!” Soap growled back as he flicked a finger hard into the part of Ghost’s forehead that he could reach.

Ghost reared back as fast as lightning, his eyes still unfocused and dazed, drunk on the taste of you, before blinking it away. A deep blush covered his cheeks as he looked at you sheepishly from under his lashes. “Sorry, luv. Are ya okay?”

“Yeah, I was just starting to get a crick in my neck.”

Relief filled his scent and settled over you like a blanket, before his expression turned a little more on the mischievous side. “Want me t’ kiss it better?”

Soap let out a loud laugh, before pushing you up towards Ghost. “Go on. The man’s insatiable. Ah cannae blame him, want tae taste you forever, but me Gran always said it’s rude not tae share.” 

Now Ghost brought your back to his chest, and his mouth got to work tasting the slightly swollen scent gland at the side of your neck. This time he wasn’t as gentle, the power of your scent here driving his alpha over the edge. He was careful not to use his teeth, but his sucking kisses were no doubt leaving bruises that would take days to heal. 

Your beasts hadn’t stopped their play the whole time, tails wagging and chasing each other around your mind's eye, but getting rougher each time the beta or alpha caught your omega. Soon they would devolve into nothing more than yips and snarls, all claws and teeth, fighting to gain power over you.

Your eyes settled on Soap as he licked his fingers before bringing them to his core. Two fingers on each side of the flushed nub of his cock as his thumb started up a slow tempo up and down.

“See what you do to him?” Ghost said as he finally let up on the sucking kisses he was leaving on your scent gland. His eyes zeroed in on the way you licked your lips as you stared at Soap’s wet core. “Ya want t’ suck ‘is cock, Vicious?”

“Yeah,” you panted, not taking your eyes off Soap.

“Ya have t’ make ‘im beg for it. Our Johnny’s so pretty when ‘e begs.”

“Ghost, come oan, dinnae make me beg!” Soap whined, but he never let up the light friction of his thumb on his cock. 

“See, ‘e already started and ya haven’t even done anythin’ yet.”

You looked between the two men for reassurance and scented the air to check for any thing out of the unusual in Soap’s scent, but all you found was a cloud heavy with want. 

“Please, Cinder.” Soap whispered, voice deep and needy, giving you a taste of what kind of sounds you could pull from the other man. That thought alone sent a shiver down your spine and had your leaking cock throbbing.

[dottores]

HELIOTROPES

pairing: dottore x fem!reader & segments

summary: the gods were sick and twisted. for five hundred years, he believed he was fated to be alone. he had long accepted it—embraced it, even. that is, until a midwinter night when that elusive red thread finally appeared on his finger. but as much as he wants to ignore it, the pull of a soulmate simply cannot be ignored.

genre: soulmate au, canon compliant for the most part.

warnings: fem!reader, worldbuilding for snezhnaya & fatui & fontaine, dottore's past includes webtoon mindset.

notes: okay y'all i know I gave u a choice over what u want to see int he next chapter but free choice is only an illusion & mother knows best & I took ur wants into consideration & decided against it bc I had a rlly great idea that can only be implemented in this chapter bc there would be no other opportunities for it later on. but im rlly happy w how some of these scenes came out so hopefully u guys are too.

RISE OF A KING, FALL OF A QUEEN

This again. 

You wanted to frown as you found yourself in a large room akin to a chamber with a tall, dome-like ceiling and marble pillars that stretched the height of the room. You were sat in a chair, wooden and creaky, and you could feel the cold shackles wrapped around your ankles without even looking down to see them for yourself. 

There were six figures sitting before you, each on large seats that reminded you of Chief Justice Neuvillette’s back in the Fontaine courthouse. Even the air was similar--damp and heavy, it made your skin crawl.

He was on trial, you put together quickly, but for what? And… where?

There wasn’t much in your line of sight besides the six people sitting in front of you. No, that’s not right. You could see a few more figures from the corner of your eye--they were armed with swords and polearms, tense and ready to act. They wore uniforms of some kind but you couldn’t make out what they were from, you didn’t recognize them. 

“Three hundred years,” one of the men in the six seats spat out. “It’s been three hundred years since the sages have had to gather for a situation like this. This should have been handled before it escalated to this, Sayid. He no longer brings shame just on the Kshahrewar Darshan, now he brings it upon all of us. This has gone too far.”

Sages, Darshan, this was the Akademiya. These were the Great Sages. The people lining the wall were the Matra.

“Attempting the forbidden, interfering with natural evolution, delving beyond the universe--three sins that he has committed and somehow this is still a discussion,” another voice--a woman this time--added on.

You thought that he should have felt anxious, upset, or even offended by the accusations but you could feel nothing. No tug at your heart, no feeling of your stomach dropping, just a cold and empty void where there should have been emotions. 

“It is a discussion because there’s not yet any proof of the sins having been committed,” a tight, male voice rebutted. “What say you, Zandik? Will you defend yourself or just sit there silently?”

Zandik. That was his name--only now you could remember, though it felt as if you had never even forgotten it.

Your lips moved as he responded, voice apathetic and dismissive: “There’s nothing to say… as you said, there is no proof of sins that I have to defend myself from.” His lips pulled up into a thin smile as he spoke, one that unnerved you and you couldn’t even see it. From the expressions on some of the people sitting in front of you, they were just as unnerved as you were.

“He doesn’t even care, Sayid,” the first man hissed. “He won’t even address the accusations laid against him.”

“Sins are not the issue at hand,” a new voice spoke up, voice low and heavy. “We are here to discuss what happened to my Dastur in the Apam Woods.”

Finally, a reaction from Zandik. He raised his chin in response to their words, a feigned attempt at confidence but you could feel the discomfort that began to stir within him--the unease. Somehow you knew that whatever he had been told he was called here for, this had not been it. They had caught him off guard.

“What is there to discuss about that?” Zandik asked. His voice sounded the same as it did before--indifferent, perfunctory--but you could feel the way his heart was beating just a fraction faster than it had been before, you could feel the way his shoulders had stiffened. “It was an unfortunate encounter with a group of Rishboland Tigers. Tragic and should have been avoidable but one of the other trainees had forgotten to set up incense to ward them off.”

“Yes,” one of the men agreed with him, “so the official report says.”

You felt restless as if you wanted to bolt from the room and hide… or he did, for the most part, but some of it was your own. You had attended enough court sessions at Fontaine’s court to know exactly what your soulmate was being accused of… and you had seen enough guilty defendants to know that the accusations were likely not far off from correct. 

Did he…?

“Yes,” Zandik agreed slowly, “because that is what happened.”

“Is it?” The man who initially changed the topic questioned. “The coroner has released to us the official report of Dastur Sohreh’s death. There were multiple trauma wounds… lacerations and contusions on internal organs… hemorrhage… but the fatal injury was a wound on the throat--a fractured hyoid bone caused by strangulation. You were the last person seen with Dastur Sohreh, were you not, trainee?” 

“Sharnama,” a woman’s voice warned but the man only held up his hand, silencing her, waiting for Zandik to respond. 

Zandik did not respond. You could feel the way he was scrambling for an answer, an explanation. You could feel how his heart was racing, how his body was tense. You could feel his anxiety and the realization dawning on him and it all made you sick to your stomach. 

What did you do? You wanted to scream at him. Why did you do it?

As if they could hear your questions, the man continued. “Dastur Sohreh reported to me several acts of insubordination while you were under her tutelage--three times in which you acted without her authorization and brought risks upon the investigation team and an encounter with a ruin hunter in which you insisted on bringing the machinery back to the Akademiya to be disassembled and reverse-engineered, which I personally had to reprimand you for and had you removed from the author list of the investigation’s research paper. When did that happen in regard to Dastur Sohreh’s death, trainee?”

“A week,” the words were frigid and biting as Zandik finally spoke up. “It happened a week before her death.”

“Yes,” he drawled, “that was it.”

“I had nothing to do with her death,” Zandik said. 

You thought you had gotten good at being able to tell whether or not people were lying. You spent three days a week in the court audience watching trials but you were in your soulmate’s body and you could not tell whether he was lying or telling the truth about murdering someone. His heart was racing and there was a twitch in the corner of his lip--the telltale signs of a lie but they could just as easily be a result of the anxiety stemming from being accused of murder. 

(You wondered, distantly, if you were just making excuses so you didn’t have to face the reality that had so suddenly been thrown at you. You had enough experience in court to differentiate the guilty from the innocent.)

“I suppose we have no way of proving that… so you are not at threat of imprisonment,” was his only response but Zandik was not at ease by those words, as if he knew exactly what was coming next. “But with reasonable suspicion of your involvement on top of the allegations regarding your research violating three sins provides grounds for expulsion… assuming it is a unanimous decision.”

It was a question cast to the other five seated in front of Zandik. You noted how Zandik seemed more anxious at the prospect of expulsion than he did at being accused of murder and you weren’t entirely sure how to feel about that. 

“Sharnama,” the only woman amongst the six spoke again, “you mean to make us the first council of sages to expel a student in centuries. The last time-”

“He murdered my Dastur, Anisa,” Sharnama snapped in response.

“I did not-” Zandik’s voice rose, harsh in defense of himself but he was cut off sharply.

“Enough from you, you had your chance to defend yourself,” Sharnama said, tone laced with venom.

“Sharnama is harsh but… the trainee has had a reputation since his time as a student,” one of the other men agreed after a few moments of silence. “His methods and theories… his interest in Khaenri’ahn machinery… It makes people uncomfortable.”

“Discomfort is not grounds for expulsion, Isami, but regardless, we cannot just dismiss all of these allegations. Should any of them prove to be true and it comes out that we knew and did nothing about it…”

“It would tarnish the integrity of the Akademiya,” the woman, Anisa, agreed quietly. “Sayid, Khalil?”

“This should have been handled when the accusations of him infringing upon the laws and rules our predecessors set up first came about,” one of the men said and you could feel Zandik’s throat spasm as he swallowed, panic beginning to set in. 

“... Sayid?” Anisa pressed after a few moments of silence.

And you could feel it. You could feel that small, minuscule bud of hope begin to bloom deep in Zandik’s chest as he shifted a wild gaze over to the sage called Sayid. You had a decent understanding of the structure of Sumeru’s Akademiya after having looked into it because of your suspicions about your soulmate, you supposed this man was the sage of whatever Darshan Zandik was a part of--Kshahrewar, you remembered one of the other men mentioning before.

Zandik trusted Sayid to defend him, you could feel it and you could feel the way his face fell and the way his stomach dropped when Sayid looked away from him, as good an answer as damning him aloud as Sharnama took his silence as agreement, waving his hand for the matra to take him.

You didn’t think Zandik even registered what had happened until rough hands were forcing him to his feet, starting to drag him from the room, and then, finally, the rage hit--bitter and deep, overwhelming. 

“Over rumors and false allegations,” Zandik spat out, hatred dripping from every word. “You’ll expel me for that?”

He got no response besides the harsh words of one of the matra urging him along but he struggled against them with every step, even with fingers digging deep into his biceps, bruising his skin, he was undeterred.

“You sages can’t even fall in line with the very virtues you set out to preserve,” he seethed, “and the sins that you deem so treacherous are just an excuse to chain anyone whose convictions do not fit your standards because you fear that a change in our way of thinking will displace your power.”

You had never felt anything like this before. This feral fury that had your blood on fire and your brain melting of coherent thought--uncontrollable and unquenchable, a type of bloodlust that shook you to your core and scared you because you could feel yourself angry too and you weren’t sure if it were remnants of Zandik’s rage spilling to you or not and you hated how you were being so influenced by his emotions that you couldn’t tell what was his and what was yours anymore.

“You’re going to regret this,” Zandik shouted as the matra pulled him through the doors of the chamber. His words, the sages’ words, they all echoed in your head over and over again--all of the accusations, his reactions, and you wondered what it meant and how much of it was true and you wondered who he was not for the first time and certainly not the last. “You’re going to regret this!”

He didn’t even bother to try the tricks he attempted last time--searching for something to read, yelling, blinking, he knew none of it would work and he wasn’t the type of person to make the same mistake twice. 

The room he was in--she was in--was large and enclosed with an overwhelmingly sweet and sickly flowery scent that made his stomach churn. He had always hated floral scents and this was beyond anything he had ever smelt before. 

And there were too many people. There were too many goddamn people. They were packed in seats before where his soulmate was sitting, they were lined up around the room as if they were waiting to do something, there were so many that the line was even pushed out two double doors, flowing into the hall.

What was going on? 

Dottore couldn’t tell. His soulmate was facing the crowd of people--there was something behind her, he could tell that much. He couldn’t see any flowers so he assumed that whatever that scent was, was coming from behind her. 

There was a man standing next to her--an older one with a cold, unfriendly expression and thick build. He watched as a woman approached the older man, disgust curling in his gut at the snot-faced expression painting her face, wide teary eyes and trembling lips as she reached for the man’s hand. Dottore wanted to step away, draw back and leave before the woman could set her eyes on him but alas, he was not in control of his body--her body--again. 

The more he thought about it, the more odd this was. The last time he had witnessed her past through dreams, her emotions had been loud and intense, deafening. It had him spiraling because he couldn’t understand what he was feeling and he couldn’t tell if he was feeling it or if it was her.

Now, it was empty. There was no joy, no anxiety, no fear or sadness; just a cool void, reminiscent of how the past week and a half of silence from her had felt. Dottore wondered if that was why Celestia was forcing him to sit through another sequence of dreams--punishment for trying to push her away.

Succeeding in pushing her away, he corrected silently, there was an odd pit in his stomach at the thought. He should be happy, he had been worried that not even a direct strike against her persistence would deter her but he had found success in the first attempt. 

It was what he wanted. He no longer had to deal with the frequent tugs on the thread. He no longer had to deal with the fluctuating emotions. He no longer had to deal with the good mornings and goodnights and the incessant questions. 

The past week had been the most peaceful and productive he’s had ever since that damned string appeared and yet somehow, he was not happy. 

It was what he wanted, he repeated but a part of him felt as if he might be trying to convince himself of it.

Around him, people were talking. He could see their lips moving and he could hear the words leaving their lips but they were unintelligible and garbled, it sounded as if they were underwater and only speaking half a word at a time, combining them to create words that didn’t make any sense. He couldn’t read their lips, no matter how hard he tried, it just looked as if they were speaking a foreign language. 

The woman who had been talking to the older man now turned to his soulmate. Instantly, dread was rocketing through him--he knew what was about to happen and there was simply nothing that he could do about it. 

Thin arms wrapped around her, tighter than he thought it would be and he wondered, hatefully, if his soulmate was some agent of Celestia sent to make his life a living hell. Three times now, he was forced to experience something through her that made his skin crawl. First, he was tossed around through that winter storm because she made stupid decisions. Then he was slapped. And now, there was a woman clinging to him, sobbing and speaking words that he couldn’t even understand and all he could do was stand there and let it happen because that’s what she was doing.

It took far too long for another woman to come along and drag her off. Dottore was livid, if he looked to the side, he was sure he would see snot on his soulmate’s shoulder and he could still feel bony arms digging into her sides.

He wasn’t sure how long she stood there. It felt like an eternity and only a few seconds somehow at the same time. People were passing by her in slow motion but they were gone in an instant. Dottore was distinctly unsettled, it felt like someone was fucking with his head, forcing him to perceive things wrongly. 

Eventually, his soulmate was approached by someone new--a younger man with dark hair and purple-red eyes. He ignored the older man to her side, everyone else had stopped at him first and then moved to her but he had beelined right to her. 

Something didn’t sit right in his stomach about that.

Dottore braced himself as best as he could as the other man reached out to grab his soulmate but instead of pulling her into a hug, he only grabbed her forearms, leaning his head down to say something that Dottore couldn’t understand again. 

He was undeterred by her lack of reaction, trying again and again and again. Dottore had half a mind to bash his head in and tell him to leave, fed up by this whole situation. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't seem to escape this. When he thought he finally succeeded, he was dragged right back in by Celestia and their fucked up games. 

Then, at last, Dottore could hear again. His soulmate was snapped out of whatever daze she had been in and noise exploded around him: scraping of chairs against the ground, mindless chatter, a violin muted in the background, slow and mournful. 

A funeral. 

For who? 

It had to be someone close to his soulmate from how they were all approaching her and suddenly, he was reminded of that night all of those years ago during the event where Pantalone was being officially promoted to Harbinger. Father, branded right on his forearm. He had yet to get a look at his soulmate through a reflection--he wondered if this was the funeral.

Most of the chatter was sympathetic, talking about the deceased and reminiscing old times… but not all of it was. He could hear whispers of men talking about what this could mean for the stability of the court, eyeing up the new opportunities that came with this death, some sounded excited rather than melancholic, like hyenas feasting on one of their own.

“There you are,” the young man in front of her said with a small smile that made Dottore frown. “Ignore all of them, they did the same thing when my grandfather died. Came to the funeral under the guise of mourning just so they could see if there was any instability for them to leech on. There wasn’t then and there isn’t now.”

“There isn’t?” his soulmate spoke for the first time--her voice was hoarse and empty, the only sort of emotion was a dull sense of doubt. “All they talk about is how I’m too weak to take over for my grandfather. They say a woman is unfit to be warden.”

“If they saw the way you could work your family’s-” he began loudly.

“Wriothesley,” the older man standing next to his soulmate said, a warning written all over his face.

“Sorry,” Wriothesley said, looking away.

“It doesn’t matter anyway,” his soulmate said after a few moments of silence, voice quiet. “The instability is right in front of everyone’s faces. They can all see that they’re not here, Wrio.” 

Wrio, Dottore thought to himself spitefully once he heard the nickname.

Wriothesley looked irritated at her words, glancing once at the older man again before speaking back up, “They didn’t show up at all? Your mother? Siblings? To your father’s funeral?”

There it was. Finally, a bit of emotion from her. She was hurt at his words, he could feel something pinching at his chest, a dark and unwelcome feeling but for some reason, it made him feel a bit more at ease after the past week of silence.

“They were busy,” she said quietly but Dottore could tell that she didn’t even believe the words herself. Neither did Wriothesley, if the expression on his face had anything to say about it. “They were, Wrio.”

Dottore wanted to roll his eyes once he heard the nickname again but instead, he distracted himself with what she had said. He thought back to the previous dreams he had of her past--being left behind by her mother and stepfather while they went to town, the argument with her mother and the slap… somehow, he wouldn’t be surprised if she had chosen not to go. 

Wriothesley scoffed loudly, loud enough to draw the attention of some of the other attendees. “They’re despicable,” he spat out. “Especially that skeevy, rat-faced-”

“Come, Wriothesley,” a middle-aged man who looked just like the younger man said sharply, interrupting him before he could finish his sentence. “This is not the place for this topic. You can speak to your betrothed another time.”

Dottore blanched. 

Betrothed?

Blood. 

That was the first thing you noticed. The thick, nasty scent of iron was all around you--around him, whatever. It was disgusting, overwhelming. You wanted to throw up, you thought that if you were in your own body, you might’ve passed out but you were in his, Zandik’s, and he was totally unbothered by the smell. 

Something was wrong with your eyes--that was the second thing you noticed. You had no peripheral vision, the only thing you could see was his hands resting on the lab table in front of you, fresh and dry blood staining his skin, dripping to the floor below. 

He was angry, the third thing you noticed. You could feel the rage curling in his gut; his nails digging into the table, grinding against the metal. You couldn’t figure out what he was angry about and you weren’t sure if you wanted to know because you had a distinct feeling that it had something to do with the blood on his hands and the lab table.

Zandik finally moved, an awful scraping sound meeting your ears as his nails dragged against the metal when he pushed off the table. He paced up and down the length of the room, muttering to himself. 

“Everything was right.”

“What went wrong?”

“-was supposed to work, don’t under-”

As he turned, you could see something--some sort of machine laying across the lab table that hadn’t been in your line of sight before. You wondered if these were ruin guards that he talked about so much. There was something pooling around it; from the distance you were at, you thought it might be oil but Zandik turned on his heel to move closer to it and a sinking feeling formed in your stomach when you realized that it was not oil, instead it was a massive puddle of blood surrounding the machine.

What the fuck? You thought to yourself as Zandik stood in front of the machine, taking one of its arms in his hand. The metal somehow felt cool and hot at the same time, uncomfortable to the touch. You wanted to let go of it, there was blood coating the metal and staining his hands even more, but Zandik’s grip was tight around it.

Why was a machine bleeding? You were sick at the thought, hoards of horrible possibilities running through your head but you didn’t get a chance to dwell on any of them.

Zandik sighed, annoyed, jerking away from the machine again to pace. His head shook back and forth in a rough manner that started to give you a headache, he did it over and over and over again and you wanted to scream at him to stop. 

“This was supposed to work, Grand Sage,” he said, clicking his tongue sharply once, then twice, and then a third time. “This was supposed to work. I did everything right. Why aren’t you working?” 

Is he talking to-

Zandik marched right back toward the machine, much to your displeasure. The longer he stared at the automaton, the more uncomfortable you felt. You could tell that it had been modified in several places, disassembled and put back together but it almost looked as if… he had put something inside it? 

“Why aren’t you working, Grand Sage?” he repeated, humming to himself irritably as he tapped his fingers against the metal. “I even went out to fetch you a new core, you’ve always been so damn ungrateful, haven’t you? Everything I did for your Darshan and you still turned your back on me. Ungrateful, even when I’m trying to make you greater than man.”

-to the machine?

You wanted to wake up, you didn’t want to see whatever this dream was showing you. You wondered if it was some cruel joke the gods were playing on you by showing you this. Or maybe they were trying to help you, you considered. He had made his opinion on you clear and yet every day you were still tempted to reach out to him, maybe they were trying to help you move past him.

“Is this what you plan to do with yourself?” a low, unfamiliar voice spoke up suddenly from the opposite end of the room. 

Zandik was startled, heart racing and head whipping to the side as he snapped his fingers together. Instantly, there was a loud whirring machine coming from behind him, metal scraping against metal--the sound of an automaton coming to life. His gaze focused on a figure stepping out from the shadows of the corner of the room, tall with graying hair and a mask that covered the entire right half of his face.

“Who are you?” Zandik demanded harshly and finally, you caught sight of him through the reflection of a metal cabinet. Red eyes stared back at you through a mask that covered three-quarters of his face and short silvery blue hair that had blood dripping from the tips of his curls. “Who are you?”

“So much potential wasting away in this poor excuse of a lab,” the man continued, undeterred by Zandik’s hostility. An eerie feeling swept over you--you weren’t sure if it was you or Zandik becoming unnerved by the man, maybe it was both of you. “Don’t you want something more?”

“What are you talking about?” Zandik asked sharply, a scalpel clutched tight in his fist--somehow, you knew that it was no match for the man standing before him and you had a feeling that he knew that too. “Did the Akademiya send you? Who are you?”

“I came after hearing rumors of an expelled student performing heretical acts… So far I’m unimpressed.”

The anger that spread through him was like wildfire, consuming all rationality and any other emotion he might’ve felt. In an instant, the automaton that had awakened behind him was moving, launching across the room at a pace that had you reeling, blades slashing outward but then at once, it stopped. A cold silence took over the room, Zandik’s brows furrowed and his lips turned down as the automaton came to a stop, shutting down right before his eyes. 

“Interesting enhancements… but unchanged at its core, meant to be operated by those that created them, not a follower of the gods.”

“I am not a follower of the gods,” Zandik spat out violently, stepping forward before he paused as if reconsidering the man’s statement. “Meant to be operated… you?”

“Yes,” he responded, ignoring Zandik’s entire change of demeanor at his words. You thought you might feel even more unnerved now, at the excited feeling bubbling inside Zandik as he stared at the man, waiting for him to continue. “What are your goals, outcast?” 

Zandik frowned. “That’s not my name-” he began but was interrupted.

“If I cared for your name, I would have learned it. If you prove yourself useful, you will be given a new identity anyway,” he told Zandik. “Now answer me, outcast, what are your goals?”

Zandik didn’t answer for a moment, staring at him, but then he glanced back at the automaton still laying on the lab table, the pool of blood beneath it now larger. Luckily, his gaze didn’t linger on it for long. 

“I’m going to enhance humans so that we can rival gods,” Zandik said, raising his chin to focus his eyes back on the man. “What do you mean? Prove yourself useful? To whom? You?”

“Lofty goals,” was all he received as a response. Zandik bristled. “How do you plan to do that? With what resources?”

Zandik opened his mouth to respond but no words left his lips. Finally, he pushed out, “I’m making progress just fine.”

“Yes,” the man said dryly, his visible eye drifting over to the mess behind Zandik. “I can see that…”

You didn’t think you liked where this was heading. Zandik was still suspicious but now he was intrigued, ready to listen to this man and whatever he had to say, and you had a feeling that this man would bring nothing good.

“I can provide you with resources,” he offered. “Funding, rare materials… new test subjects. All of the finest and as much as you need.”

“What do you want in return?” Zandik asked.

“There is a war coming,” he responded cryptically, “and you are going to help prepare us for it.”

“A war?” Zandik asked, baffled. “A war against who?”

But you knew. 

You knew. 

It was the same war that had the Hydro Archon’s paranoia escalating. The war that forced you to hide your soulmark and thread your entire life, that had you looked down on and whispered about because you had to tell people you had no soulmate. The war led by the same organization that had sent your stepfather to Fontaine as an infiltrator, the man who had killed your father and ruined your life. 

At once, all of your nightmares and all of your worst fears came true. 

“A war against the gods.”

Betrothed?

Dottore was appalled, reeling at the knowledge that was just forced onto him. The scene shifted, Dottore was now in a smaller room kneeling in front of a woman that he recognized from the first dream he had of his soulmate but he couldn’t even focus on the situation at hand.

Betrothed?? 

Since when had she been betrothed? Dottore thought that would have been one of things that she mentioned when she was rambling on about her days at night. He thought it might’ve been something that was at least hinted at when she couldn’t control what words were being sent to him. 

“I have to leave, mother,” Dottore’s lips were moving as she spoke but quite frankly, he didn’t give a shit about whatever conversation she was having with her mother. The lack of emotions she was feeling left a vacuum that allowed his feelings to spiral and he was having trouble trying to keep control of them. 

He couldn’t even tell what the emotions rattling him were. He thought that he had become better at pinpointing emotions ever since he was forced to deal with hers but this was foreign--green and ugly, beyond just anger or sadness, stronger than anything he’s felt in centuries.

“You do not have to leave, you’re choosing to.”

Dottore thought he might feel insulted--disrespected, even, being given a soulmate only for them to be married off to someone else. Another cruel joke played by the gods to spite him, a cruel joke played by her to spite him. He wondered if this was her getting back at him for never responding to those goodnight tugs she always used to do: talking to him, trying to get him to fall for her trap and respond, only for her to be with someone else. 

“I do, I have to go. There’s something I have to do.”

He shouldn’t feel insulted, or disrespected. He shouldn’t care at all whether or not his soulmate was betrothed to someone else. He never planned on speaking to her. He never planned on meeting her. And he absolutely never planned to do anything about the bond forced on him by Celestia. In fact, this should make him feel better. It meant that there was less of a chance for her to reach out to him again if she was in a relationship with someone else. 

It freed him of her. This should be a good thing for him, so why was he so angry?

“You won’t even tell me where you’re going,” her mother snapped. “Best not be to the north, there’s only so much more I can defend you from peoples’ suspicions. They’re starting to ask questions.”

But it was not a matter of whether or not he should or shouldn’t care. It was the sheer audacity she had to keep reaching out to him when she was set to marry, or even has married someone else at this point. She was trying to play games with him and if there was one thing that Dottore couldn’t stand, it was someone trying to play games with him--be it the gods, other Harbingers, or some random girl that Celestia decided to tie him to. 

“It doesn’t matter where-”

“Of course, it matters,” the mother said, fingers digging into his soulmate’s forearms. “What am I to tell Her Excellency when she asks about where you went off to? The last thing our family needs is the speculation that would come along with people thinking you went off to Snezhnaya.” 

Finally, he felt something from her--something sharp and jagged tugging at her chest that drew him from his thoughts, an emotion he had become acquainted with through her intimately over the past few years: sadness, disappointment.

“Wow,” she said dryly, “that’s what you’re worried about. Suspicions against your family. Not whether or not I might be going somewhere dangerous.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth,” her mother said, livid. “Of course, I care about whether or not you’re going somewhere dangerous. I’m your mother.”

“I’m not going to argue with you,” his soulmate said after a moment, rising to her feet and pulling her arms from her mother’s grip. “You can tell the Hydro Archon I’ve left for Mondstadt.”

“Is that where you’re actually going?” her mother rose to her feet after her, taking a step forward, but his soulmate did not respond. Her mother’s face fell. “You’re going north, aren’t you?” 

Dottore finally focused on the situation at hand. North? But the only thing north of Fontaine was-

“Aren’t you?” her mother demanded. “You’re going to Snezhnaya? Why are you going there? To find him?”

Him. She must be referring to Dottore. But why would his soulmate come looking for him if she had…?

“I didn’t say that,” his soulmate shook her head, looking away out toward the window. It was a dreary day, dark clouds hanging low and rain sprinkling down to the streets below. “I told you to tell the Hydro Archon I’m going to Mondstadt.”

“Why are you going there? Why? Answer me,” her mother’s voice rose, eyes tearing up as she stepped closer to his soulmate. She stepped back, freezing her mother in place.

“Have you ever communicated with your soulmate through thoughts? The words that show up on your forearm?” she finally asked, tone harsh and accusing, a sudden change of subject.

Dottore paused, trying to put together what this might be about now. This was another reason why he hated these damn dreams, he never had any context behind what was happening and Dottore hated not knowing things.

“What sort of question is that?” her mother hissed, taken aback. “Of course-”

Her mother cut herself off suddenly, brows furrowing and lips twisting into a deep frown. Dottore could feel his soulmate swallow thickly, watching the reaction to her question. She had been expecting this and he wasn’t sure if it was dread or satisfaction pooling in her stomach--maybe both.

“Have you ever thought about why you don’t communicate through it? Have you ever tried and he just doesn’t respond? Do you try flicking your thread? Does he flick it back?” his soulmate let loose a barrage of questions and a creeping suspicion began to arise, wondering if she was implying what he thought she was.

“What are you trying to say?” her mother shook her head, stepping away. “Enough.”

“I’m not trying to say anything,” his soulmate responded, turning on her heel to leave the room. “But maybe you should think about it.”

She didn’t say anything else as she left the room and finally, Dottore could think.

She was accusing her stepfather of faking the bond with her mother, Dottore realized. But how would he do that? He knew people were capable of faking bonds through old magics but as far as he was aware that type of magic was all but lost… Dottore’s mind was suddenly racing, remembering all of the things he had forgotten in the last dream he had of her past: what he had figured out about the spy in the upper ranks of the Fatui and they had a spy in Fontaine, one of Arlecchino’s spiders and Arlecchino was capable of the old magic, and his soulmate was coming north to Snezhnaya so obviously she must have reason to believe that it had something to do with the Fatui, could it be-

Dottore felt a headache coming on. 

He had a feeling that this was going to be very, very bad.

You woke up with a sharp, shaky breath. Your hand flew to your chest as you sat up straight, reeling from what you had just experienced. Blood, anger, betrayal, hope--what could you remember? What could you remember?

You scrambled to the small table at your bedside immediately, grabbing your notebook and panicking to find the pen that had fallen to the floor. You dropped to your hands and knees, fumbling around in the dark until you found it beneath your bed. You didn’t even bother rising to your feet again as you made yourself comfortable on the floor so you could start jotting down everything you remembered.

A cold, empty room. Six people. Exile? Sins and virtues. Lots of blood. An automaton. Uncontrollable, sickening rage. An unfamiliar figure. War. 

War.

But what was the context? Your head was pounding as you tried to remember, you wondered if Celestia was warning you against trying to push too hard for information you’re not meant to remember yet. You didn’t care. You had to know. 

War. The rebellion stirring in the north. But what about it? What was the damn context?

You glanced down at your forearm, frustration pricking at you as the window above you rattled against the Snezhnayan winter storm. You could feel the freezing air even from inside the warm room with the fireplace burning on the opposite wall--it was unlike anything you had ever experienced before, the cold storms at the estate that you thought were the end of the world paled in comparison to this.

You wanted to yell at him, demand to know who he was and what he had done, beg him for the answers that you should’ve received by now… but you remembered the words scrawled across your forearm, the cruel words that cut deeper than any of the nasty words that had been spat at you by people throughout your life.

He did not care about you, you reminded yourself, you have more self-respect than this. Do not reach out to him.

You sighed heavily, arm dropping to your side as you stared back up at the window, watching a branch scrape against the glass over and over and over again. You were only on the Snezhnayan border but already you were feeling anxious--you had half a mind to turn back but the only thing stopping you was the memory of your father, the lust for justice, vengeance. You couldn’t turn back, not until you had all of the information you needed, not until you were sure you could return to Fontaine and have your stepfather imprisoned in the Black Cells.

There was a heavy feeling in your heart as you pushed yourself back off the floor, putting the notebook away and taking a seat back on the thin mattress of the inn you were staying at, the wood of the bed frame creaking beneath you. 

You had a distinct feeling that your journey to find proof against your stepfather would lead you to him as well.

He sat upright, eyes wild as he tried to figure out where he was. His heart was racing, anger was still flooding his blood, he breathed in and out deeply as he tried to regain control of himself. He was back in his lab--not dealing with any more of those god forsaken dreams. He wanted to spit out a string of vile curses up toward the gods but he refrained, trying to piece together what he could remember before the vague memories faded. 

He flipped over the parchment he had been taking notes on before he had fallen asleep, rubbing the bridge of his nose and squeezing his eyes shut as he pressed his pen to the paper and noted down all of the hazy details.

Flowers. Wrio? Betrothed?? Mother. Leaving. Snezhnaya. 

Dottore exhaled, gaze zeroing in on the third word of his list--betrothed. He glanced down at the thread connected to his thumb, inhaling deeply as an unfamiliar emotion began to churn inside of him. Before it could take hold, Dottore diverted his attention to the last two words.

Leaving. Snezhnaya.

What did that mean? What was the context? He couldn’t remember. Was she coming to Snezhnaya? Was she in Snezhnaya and leaving? Or did the two words not have any connection? 

No, they had to be connected. It was something important, he knew that much at least, but what? The answer was on the tip of his tongue and again that temper of his began to thin, what was the answer? What was the goddamn answer? Why was she coming to Snezhnaya? 

Should he ask?

The option rang damning through his head as he looked down at his forearm. She could be in danger if she came to Snezhnaya--the nation was becoming more and more antagonistic to outsiders, especially outsiders from Fontaine and Natlan and especially because of the masked hostile that was running through Fatui camps and slaughtering their underlings. No matter how much Pulcinella and Pantalone demanded that they take caution with outsiders, there was no telling what a heat of the moment reaction could lead to if there was a possible threat and Arlecchino had made clear that Fontaine was on the verge of becoming a threat to the Fatui. 

As he contemplated his choices, Dottore suddenly paused, another realization hitting him suddenly: if he had dreamt of her past then…

Then she dreamed of his past.

Dottore waited, staring at his forearm--waiting for the questions, the disgust, the horror. It was inevitable, he knew it. Last time, he assumed they dreamed of similar time periods of their life. Hers was when she was young, five to twelve years old between both dreams, he assumed; and the word he received from her was cursed, which was directed at him from when he was a child up until he was chased from the village at ten. And if the time periods were similar… that left his Akademiya and post-Akademiya era up as options for what she could have dreamt about, and neither of those periods of his life were particularly pleasant.

He waited and he waited and he waited… but nothing showed up on his forearm, not a question nor an accusation, no emotion spread through him that he thought might’ve been hers--just emptiness, just like it had been for the past week and a half. 

Dottore exhaled heavily, leaning back against his seat and staring up at the ceiling above him, trying to figure out what he was supposed to do with this and how he was supposed to make sure she didn’t get herself killed traveling through Snezhnaya.

The week and a half of peace was over and he realized, quickly, that it had only been the calm before the storm. 

rbs appreciated!

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 Ep8 Musings - Loustat (SPOILERS) Pt2: Reunion

You don't know the HALF of what Lestat feels for Louis, to let YOUR grimy arse steal his man, just for LOUIS's happiness. ANYTHING for Louis.

Am I the only one who felt left hanging? We BEEN knew it didn't make sense, but what's your POINT, exactly? If Louis misremembered Lestat whispering, it's just par for the course about the odyssey of recollection. But if Lestat DID do telepathy, is that evidence of...what? That the vampire bond works differently than what's been explained? That he COULD read Lou's mind? AMC, this is AGGRAVATING.

Your goose is COOKED, my guy.

The copium & denial pack Louis was smoking as he laughed was 🤌

That's right, start sweating!

Master manipulation; cuz he certainly would NOT have, as we soon find out. ANYTHING for Louis. (Dang, Imma have to take back some of what I said about Lestat's character development not having started yet.)

I was shocked. I was NOT expecting this plot twist. I was ready to throw Lestat out with the rest of the TRASH, in the DUMP. Well dang. Guess I'll only leave him rotting in a TINY landfill.

I nearly SCREAMED--@nashvillethotchicken and I were talking about Loustat as Bobby and Whitney ages ago! I cannot BELIEVE AMC threw in a New Edition reference in the year of our lord 2024; y'all are diabolical AF, Rolin, STOP IT.

I wonder if AMC used Hurricane Odette cuz the OG script was set in pandemic!2020, so it would make sense that a year later Louis would head back to NOLA during 2021 when Hurricane Odette last hit.

That looks like NOLA's Pontchartrain Hotel--lemme find out he bumped into the Mayfairs when Rowan & them were in town, LOL.

Lestat got more aliases than the KGB; meanwhile Louis just sprinkles his long AF unique AF name all over the place. 🤦 But I guess it's ok, since the tour guide never mentioned him & Claudia by name. (Not Tom Anderson in another finale, LOL.) Louis so offended the tour guide said he ran a voodoo cult. XD

Fall of the House of Lioncourt-Melmouth.

You're gosh darned right! THEE Louis of Troy is in the building!

You love to see it. "A wearisome fledgling; all the millennials are--" not Lestat making PALE PROXIES of rat-catcher extraordinare LDPDL out of millennials. 😭

Lestat, if you don't get your crazy arse outta here with that bloodstained wooden keyboard Imma ROTFLMFAO.

NO JOKE, I effed up my friend's whole set when I started screaming "Siri, Pause," cuz my friend's Siri started freaking out and effed up the volume! XD

HERE WE EFFING GOOOOOOOO

(Best scene all season, fight me on this)

You know this was TEARING Lestat up, cuz of what happened in 1973--I gave Louis to you so you could do BETTER by him than EYE did, and instead it's NICKI ALL OVER AGAIN.

Imma smack him--this is NOT the time to be self-loathing, Lestat!

NOLA is my home--and the SAINT is not a city--I'm gonna cry.

He did. He just forgot, when reality settled in and the allure/nostalgia/glamour wore off. "I tried to make nights awful for you." Not the whole time, Louis. Y'all actually were happy b4--even Claudia said "the easy times" stopped after Florence died; and esp. after Charlie died. Lou can't be blamed for grieving his mom's death, and he definitely can't be blamed for Lestat & Claudia falling out after Charlie. Everything that happened after that--the 7 years of depression--was ALSO Lestat's fault. "I wanted you to suffer, cuz I was suffering;" I'm glad Les just waved that aside and said they BOTH wronged e/o.

He's not suicidal anymore then! He has nights in front of him to look forward to! So Lou can finally "learn to live honestly" with HIMSELF.

And Lestat dove RIGHT ON IN with that! He's been carrying that with him for DECADES, worried about Louis & what happened.

I LOVE that Les' language changes (the way his voice CRACKS and goes so TINY, oml)--he asked Lou in 1973 if he was "ill," and if something had happened TO him; so as to not spook/trigger or blame him--but he can ask more candidly now in a (relatively) "healthier" 2024 if Lou tried to hurt/kill himself; and get a more candid/honest answer. CLOSURE, y'all, I'm gonna cry.

GOOOOOOD. Don't EVER forget your daughter. Y'all need to have a Claudia Memorial; to KEEP remembering her, as she was in all her vampiric splendour, the good times AND the bad times.

I KNOW this hurt Louis to his effing core. The way Jacob cried FIRE!

I'm so glad Lou hugged him--YES YOU WERE, Uncle Les. And you KNOW it; you FELT that bond b/t y'all, even if she never looked at you. The distance b/t y'all was in name only, cuz a little Black girl couldn't have TWO daddies in 1917 and have one of them be white on top of it. I AM YOUR MAKER, sure, but you were her BLOOD FATHER, and she loved you, which is why she hoped you'd help her.

ANOTHER ROUND IN THE STORMY ROMANCE OF YOU TWO. 😭👏

What are these magical off-mic speeches/pep-talks Louis keeps giving people in Season 2?!? THE PEOPLE WANNA KNOW, gosh darnit!

DRATS.

I get why Jam said they thought the Loustat ending was "satisfying." It was nice, even though I'd've preferred to see Lestat in the Dubai penthouse at the end. :\

I LOVE THIS, AMC, thank you! ❤️

[kenneduck]

Sidlink Exchange

Had a funny idea that ended up going longer! It continues under the read more, so I'm not spamming y'alls Tumblr pages haha! Enjoy some BOTW Sidlink!

After leaving Zora's Domain, Link walks down Zora River on the paths back to Central Hyrule. Though, he finds himself smirking and trying to ignore the clear shuffling sounds in the river that have been following him since his departure. Link refuses to make it known that he is VERY much aware that he's being followed, as he wants to know just how far this company of his will travel just behind him.

After finally making it to Lanayru Wetlands, Link hears the water start to splash behind him! Followed by TWO voices in a hushed shouting spat? Two voices definitely threw Link off, causing him to turn around, and spot (unsurprisingly) Sidon, holding (SURPRISINGLY) Tumbo.

Tumbo: You said we'd go frog catching AGES ago! I tried to be patient, but now we're SO far from HOME! Why are we even following Link anyways?

Sidon: I said we would go hunting AFTER! W-We just had to... see him off!

Tumbo: Then why have we been HIDING?

Sidon: Well, we-

Link: Yes, Sidon. Why HAVE you both been hiding?

Sidon: AH, LINK? Well. Hah! Ah, so you've spotted US! *flailing an arm around while his other arm keeps Tumbo in a choke hold* Tumbo here, little rascal, decided to sneak off to join your journey! Ah, but that is NOT something he should be doing, so if you don't mind, we will be RETURNING!

Tumbo: LIES!

Sidon: Ah! Haha! *whispers* Be QUIET.

Tumbo: *trying to wriggle free, but decides to bite Sidon to do so*

Sidon: GAH! *drops Tumbo into the water*

Tumbo: I'm frog catching WITHOUT you! You LIAR! *swims back upstream*

Sidon: *whining as Link just STANDS there at the edge of the river, staring while he holds onto the bite mark, whimpering* Ahah! You can go now! No need to pause your travels over ME!

Link: Mhm...

Link: *Flops down onto the grass. Pulling out his Sheikah Slate to conjure up some healing elixirs* But wouldn't it be out of character for me to walk away from someone in distress? Like how it's out of character for a zora prince to be caught up in a lie?

Sidon: *huffs and takes the elixir, healing the bite mark*

Link: *puts down his Sheikah Slate and shifts over to the edge of the river, dropping his legs into it* What was the plan anyways? Use Tumbo as a means to travel outside the domain? But then just sneak behind me and stare like a creep?

Sidon: *huffing* Well, I-I! I was GOING to travel alone, but when Tumbo tagged along, I couldn't just say "I wanted to see Link off! Again!" Considering I had already JUST done so in front of the domain moments before! So I had to come up with SOMETHING!

Link: And your best was frog catching?

Sidon: *waves his arms around* What was I SUPPOSED to do? Admit to a CHILD that I wanted a private moment with my LOVER? Now he's going to tell everyone what happened, a-and they'll get suspicious of me! Of US!

Link: *about to make a snarky remark*

Sidon: *groans and flops his head on Link's lap, catching Link by surprise* I cannot help but stress about their reaction to us... about father's reaction. Muzu is always in his ear, and he's BARELY favorable to you, despite all your help with Vah Ruta and Zora's Domain.

Link: *gently running his hand down Sidon's tail fin*

Sidon: I-I believe... I believe my father truly would accept my affections for you. Even if it took time, but... I worry the disappointment would be great. That even if he could fain approval... he would be disingenuous about it... H-How I am right now, seeing you off in front of others as my dearest friend and nothing more.

Link: *uses both of his hands to gently have Sidon look up to him from his lap* Sidon... the decision of if or when you tell others about us is yours to make, but know it IS yours... and that if you chose to take it, I'll be right there. At your side. Whatever happens, I'll be right there.

Sidon: *pushes the weight of his head against Link's hands, releasing a deep exhale followed by a soft grin*

Link: And not creepily standing far off in the distance failing to hide while having some random child in a choke hold.

Sidon: *gives Link a little glare, causing Link to snicker*

Sidon: *in a swift motion, Sidon goes from treading the river as Link holds his face, to pushing Link back and pinning him down on the grass. Using his torso to pin Link's body under his own. Making the distance between their two faces ever closer.*

Link: *Gasps from the sudden shock, and is flushed in the face*

Sidon: I've got to head back now. I can catch up to Tumbo and follow through on frog catching before he blathers on what else happened today.

Link: But-

Sidon: I WAS hoping to see you off with a kiss, but it seems you are too creeped out by me to want one.

Link: *rolls his eyes*

Sidon: *continues his glare*

Link: You're NOT creepy.

Link: *looks at Sidon expanctingly, but just sees him STILL glaring*

Link: *mutters under his breath*

Link: Agh, fine! You're adorable. You following me was CUTE, and I didn't make it known I KNEW you were following me because I knew as SOON as I did you'd STOP following me, and I was very much ENJOYING your company!

Sidon: *his frown twitches momentarily, and he leans in a bit closer*

Link: And the fact you FAILED to lie just makes me adore you even more! You're SO bad at it, but that's because your heart is SO pure you don't even know HOW!

Link: *deeply flustered as he AGAIN stares at Sidon expectantly*

Sidon: *really doing his best to keep his glare going, but his tail fin starts to have a little wag*

Link: *can't help but smirk* A-And I LOVE how DIFFICULT it is for you to ACT mad, but your tail whipping around gives it away!

Sidon: *finally breaks with a laugh and closes the space between them with a kiss*

*followed by another, and another, with a few longing pecks as Sidon pulls himself off from Link, bringing him back to the sitting position from before*

Sidon: *reaches to Link and pulls him into one more longing kiss before Sidon sinks back into the river*

Sidon: When will you next arrive?

Link: *grabbing his bag and Sheikah Slate* I'll be traveling to Lurelin village and exploring Necluda for the next while, but... before I travel up north to Akkala, I'll come here for a quick visit.

Sidon: *brushes his hand against one of Link's legs that're sunk into the river* Quick?

Link: *looks down to Sidon*

Sidon: *gives a little pout*

Link: One filled with a handful of days then. For you.

Sidon: Hm... you have me already looking forward to what's in store.

Link: With the eagerness you showed during our last few nights together... I can't say I'm quite surprised.

Sidon: *looks extremely flustered* A-Ah, well, I-

Link: *smirking as he pulls himself up from the river and hoists himself up* I should start heading out, then. The sooner I get going, the sooner the next visit will be.

Sidon: *stammering* Y-Yes! Yes. Very much so, yes!

Link: *turns around and starts walking off, flicking a little goodbye wave before nonchalantly saying* Love you, Sidon!

Sidon: Mhm, yes! I very much-

Sidon: WHAT? Link, what was THAT?

Link: *keeps walking*

Sidon: I-I love you too!

Link: *no reaction*

Sidon: WAIT, THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID, RIGHT? That you-

Link: *whistles as he keeps walking off*

Sidon: *flustered* L-LINK, I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME!

Link: Go catch up to Tumbo before it's too late!

Sidon: D-DID YOU HEAR WHAT I SAID?

Link: *continues to whistle*

Sidon: GAH! Link, you- AGH, dammit Tumbo!

Sidon: *splashes and starts swimming back up Zora River*

Link: *continues whistling with a MIGHTILY red flushed face, doing his best to keep his heart from beating out of his chest*

[leahnardo-da-veggie]

Home

Introducing part 2 of stuff that's been rejected from publishers! I hope y'all enjoy :)

As the train station rumbled with movement, I pulled my hoodie over my shoulders and adjusted my mask. Better safe than sorry, my mother always said, and I tended to agree.

Even with the mask, the air reeked of ammonia. It stung my nostrils and made my eyes water. Damn, but I wanted to be back. The gantry was empty, automated stations blinking neon in the hazy air. I hopped over it and continued through, shoes squeaking ever so slightly against the tiles. Rare that the train station was in a train station, I thought.

The clock overhead warned me that it was almost midnight. Whyever they used an analogue clock in this day and age, I did not know. I watched its fourth hand speed towards 13. Just as it struck, the train sped into the station, the lights glinting off it like a kingfisher diving in the mangrove.

Its doors, several tons of solid gold, creaked open to reveal a single man, in a tophat and intricately embroidered vest. “Miss Maya,” he said, by way of greeting. His accent was impossible to place, vaguely refined with a peculiar emphasis on the sybilants. 

I stepped into the train and returned his nod. We had met before, and courtesy never hurt. “Hama. Being daring today, aren't we? Sitting in an empty carriage?”

Hama shrugged. “Please, Miss Maya, do not fret over me like a hen. I am careful,” he told me. Unlike you went unsaid.

Maya and Hama were not our real names, of course. Those were far too valuable to hand out to another. But they were close enough for both our purposes.

I sank myself into the soft cushion. “Don't be ridiculous. You shouldn't have risked it, careful or not. You've heard what happened to the poor bastards who got caught by it, haven't you?”

Hama sighed. “Yes, but ‘twas almost midnight,” he explained, a hint of melancholy in his dry voice. “I was thinking of the rumours.” Beneath us, the train rumbled into motion, grinding gears and pumping steam.

“The rumours, huh?” We had all heard of them. They were lies, of course. The idea that the midnight train held any special powers was… Tempting. “You should've known how dangerous believing that crap is.”

Hama just shook his head. Briefly, I regretted chiding him. These train rides were long infuriating, and often dreary beyond belief. Having someone willing to talk with me was worth a lot sometimes.

“I'm sorry, Hama,” I said, when the pause between us stretched too long. “You don't need the reminder, do you?”

Quietly, he said, “‘Tis just- Do you not miss it?”

I froze. We did not speak of it. Nobody with half a grain of sense did. I opened my mouth to speak, then closed it.

“I have not seen it in five years, Miss,” he continued. “My wife will be old and wrinkled by the time I get home. My sons will have grown up. My daughter would be married, without me to give her my blessings. Do you know what that feels like, Miss Maya? To watch the world go by?”

I swallowed the knot in my chest, and said, “I know. Believe me, I do.”

Hama ran his fingers through his overgrown hair. “How long has it been for you? You are so young, I cannot imagine it has been more than three years.”

“Two,” I said, quietly enough that my voice was swallowed by the train.

Hama had sharp ears, however. “Two years? Your formative years, then. That is a travesty,” he informed me with avuncular concern.

A laugh bubbled out of my chest. It sounded just like the ammonia in the station I had just departed from, sting-sharp and hateful. “Not two years,” I replied, grimly amused.

“Two decades.”

He blinked. “You hardly look a day over sixteen,” he told me, finally. “It simply cannot be.”

“Have you not noticed? We do not age here. My hair has not grown an inch since the day I began wandering. Our wounds do not heal. Old Akat died from blood loss after she stepped on a nail. So believe me when I say, I too am careful.” The last words emerged in a hiss, barely more than the steam that powered our train.

“I- Twenty years? I cannot imagine how painful that must be, and with you so young. You poor-” The squealing of the train's halt cut off the rest of his words, sparing me the pain of telling him about the lonely nights, the shivering desperation that had festered in my heart, the slow death of a hope that should never have existed in the first place.

The doors swung open, and I fled out. The lands beyond were smoggy, thick with mist and carbon monoxide. Yet I could see the telltale signs of suburbia beyond. They reminded me of the days before, and it twisted the knife Hama had stabbed my bruised heart with. So I snapped, with a childish vengefulness, “And there's no such thing as a way back!”

The doors clanged shut firmly on my back, and Hama left with them. It was dangerous to be on a train alone, of course, but he had willingly taken that risk in the name of what… A rumour? That the midnight train would take you home?

Foolishness, I insisted, and tried to ignore the way the streetlights looked just the way they had twenty years ago. The streets were so similar, too. There were the potted plants lining the sidewalks, forcing me to walk on the roads home. There were the birdcages and the washing machines beneath crowded canopies.

The tracks disappeared behind me, leaving me exactly where I had left twenty years ago. The road signs were identical. I was on the right street, too. Just a short way away from a house I had once resided in.

It was absurd, of course. Once you wandered, you would never find your way home again. Everyone knew that.

Still, the worm of hope gnawed at the apple core of my soul. I kicked a stone angrily, as though that would chase the emotion away. It did not, and I continued striding grimly.

But if I truly believed I could not go home, why did I continue wandering? Why not settle down like Haru did, in some strange town with four-eyed people? Why not make a new place to live and call… Well, a place to live. I could not bring myself to say the word, even after all those years away.

That house was different, I noted with fierce satisfaction. There had never been a house with a green roof in the past. That settled it, of course. My paranoia was simply acting up again.

Yet- a lot could change in two decades. It might even have been more than that, for all I knew. I had met a wanderer who forgot their own name, once. A couple of years could have easily gone amiss.

Before I could banish the niggling thought, my over-sharp eyes caught the next house's number. 542. Just a short distance from my old ho- habitat.

Damn, but I wanted to go back. 

What could it hurt? If I went there and proved to myself I was not, in fact, back, I could put the irritant to rest once and for all. My feet took me along the path I had once taken back from school. Or a close mimicry of it, at least.

I came upon the house sweating slightly. Not out of excitement. I merely wanted to get it over and done with, to rid myself of this compulsion.

The lawn was slightly overgrown, utterly unlike how my father would have left it. The roof had more than a few tiles that needed replacing. Our swing was there, but the rope was fraying. The fault of time, or a sloppy trap.

The lights were on. Warm light shone through the windows. I could here people moving about, eating and chatting and doing whatever it was people did in their locations of staying. I had almost forgotten how such things went, with no need to eat or drink.

It was probably a trap, a lie, or one of those odd coincidences that occurred sometimes. Pressing that doorbell, which looked nothing like my old one, was a ridiculous idea. Yet my finger was drawn to it like a moth to flame.

The bell rang like the train's whistle.

With the scuffing of chairs and curious exclamations, the door swung open. An old woman, her skin wrinkled with liver spots, stood on the other side. “Eh?” She narrowed her eyes at me.

Before common sense could take over, I pulled down my hoodie and took off my mask, baring my face to the world. 

The woman made a small choking noise. “M- May-”

“Maya,” I said quickly, the way I told the strangers I met on my wanderings. “Call me Maya.” What she would call me had I not interrupted, I did not want to know.

“Oh.” She deflated slightly. Her ugly flower-print dress did remind me of my mother's sense of fashion. “You remind me of my daughter, was all. Though you're much too young to be her. Ah, what was the matter?”

I froze. What was I to say: ‘Hello, I have been frozen in time for twenty years wandering world to world and boy, you sure look like my mother aged up by two decades'? 

The silence stretched on. It was doing a lot of that recently, I noted. “You remind me of my mother, too,” I replied, my voice barely a whisper, not needing the train's clanging to drive it underground. “Though it has been twenty years since I last saw her.”

The woman who looked awfully like my mother stared into my eyes. “James? Come here. There's something you need to see,” she cried, in lieu of something better to say.

James was my father's name too. Another funny coincidence. The old man who wheeled himself to the door had an uncanny semblance to him too, though my real father would never have ended up in a wheelchair.

He looked up and me and let a little gasp out. “It- Oh my god, it can't be. Allison, are you seeing this?”

My mother had been named Allison. I was reminded of another one of her favourite sayings. ‘Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.’ This had to be a trap. Yet, for some reason, I could not bring myself to leave.

The woman who could not possibly be my mother told him, “She says her name is Maya.”

He regarded me thoughtfully. “What's your favourite juice, kid? And who were your best friends in primary five?”

“I'm torn between apple and grape juice, and my closest friends were Betty and Qi Le, though I hung out with Josh a lot too,” I answered promptly, before cursing myself. What was I doing, handing out private information? That was how wanderers got caught! “Go on, tell me: what did your daughter make for you for science class when she was 10?”

Allison and James, my parents' doppelgangers, exchanged another concerned glance. “I’ll do you one better than that,” Allison told me. She reached back into the room and brought out a little clay dragonfly. “This was a part of the set yo- I mean, she made. The larvae and the eggs are lost, but we kept this.”

I did not know whether to laugh or weep. It was green. The one I had made was blue. Oxidation, a part of me whispered. Lies, the other bit cried. “Yep,” I whispered. “That's the one.”

“You had best come inside,” James said, his motorised wheelchair whirring slightly as he backed into the kitchen. My father was braver than that. He would not back away from discomfort. “Would you like some apple juice?”

“Oh, I don't really eat or drink anymore.” I smiled bitterly at their horrified expressions and stepped past Allison into the room. “It all comes right back up again.”

I had tried, of course. I had gulped down water from a dozen streams, begged food off of strange people and taped my mouth shut to keep it down. No matter what I did, my intestines simply rejected it. I could never feel full. I could never feel hungry. I had learnt to accept it long ago, but I could never feel truly alive.

I took up my old place at the table, in the corner next to the old bookshelf. It was still there, though its contents were devoid of all my young adult romances. “What are you?” Allison had a slight roundness to her eyes. Fear. I felt the same when she clenched her fist up. Old though she was, even a single blow from her had the potential to kill me.

“I am a girl who walked into a strange train station in the middle of the street twenty years ago, and wandered for two decades since,” I told her bluntly. It was the same line I gave all my hosts. “How are Qi Le and Betty?”

My mother's brow crinkled and she blinked away a couple of tears. “Is it really you? I- I mean- It's been so long, and you haven't aged a bit. You know, Qi Le's got a little boy. He's hardly younger than you were when you…” She shrugged.

“Wandered off,” I finished. I crossed my arms. “Qi Le would never have a kid. She's deathly afraid of pregnancy. So the question remains: How do I know it's really you?” I glanced down at her leg, the skirt covering her calf. “Still have your tattoo?”

It might have been better to walk off there and then. Damn, but I wanted to go back. I actually wanted to be back on my train and my endless worlds. “Of course it's me,” Allison snarled, sharper than my mother ever would have at me. “And Qi Le adopted, for heaven's sakes! You're the one who doesn't eat or drink, who hasn't blinked since you came in, and whose expression barely changes!”

“Your tattoo,” I repeated. I had come to terms with what I was long ago. It was… tolerable. 

My ‘mother’ went peculiar. Her face slackened and eyes went blank, like a marionette without a puppeteer. I got up and began walking to the door. Of course it was a lie. Twenty years wandering, and I still had the foolishness to believe rumours? I was worse than Hama.

“Maya, right?” My ‘father’ waved to me from his place in the kitchen, as I crossed the door's threshold. “Pardon your mother. We aren't so young anymore, kiddo. The stress has been a bit too much for her.” He wheeled himself up the ramp, which had not been there when I last at my house, and gently prodded Allison. She jerked herself back upright and inhaled sharply.

“I’m fine,” my ‘mother’ snapped. “And as for my tattoo, I had it removed. My wrinkling skin was ruining it. It's been twenty years, Mayra. Twenty years, and you haven't aged a day. What the hell happened to you?”

Mayra was my name. Or, it had been many years ago. “I don't know,” I admitted. “It just did.” What was I even doing here? On the tiny, tiny off chance that this was real, it would only hurt me. “Qi Le's got a kid? What's he like?” 

With the same exhaustion that permeated her entire being, my mother sighed. “Here, take this and phone her.” She handed me a little metal slide.

“What am I supposed to do with this?” I shook it slightly. “And where's the cordless? It was dope.” I had been so proud of the old thing.

“Oh, sweetie,” James said. “It's been twenty years. Things have changed since then. Phones are smaller these days, and they're all cordless.” He took the phone from me and tapped on it.

That settled it. I had seen my fair share of strange technologies, and nothing from the world I once came from looked even slightly like this. Even so, I accepted the phone when James returned it, and pressed it to my ear.

“Hey, QL,” I said, when she picked up the call. “It's me.”

There was nothing but static on the other end. Finally, she responded, sniffling slightly as she did so. “If this is a prank, it's not a very good one. Mayra died a long time ago, but that doesn't make it alright to joke about it.” Her voice was so husky, so unlike her.

“It's me,” I repeated. “Did you get to go with Kyle to prom?”

Qi Le took a shuddering breath. “Where have you been, you idiot? And no, Kyle went with Gwen. You know, the stupid mean girl in our class? Yeah, and she's the CEO of some big shot company now. Kyle married a man. I got to go to their wedding. Damn it, I spent three years hunting all over the country for you. Your parents- They cried themselves to sleep every night. How could you?”

There had never been a Gwen in our class. Had my memory failed me, or was this a lie that swept by? And Kyle- Kyle who always talked about girl's looks? Ridiculous. I listened to her tirade silently. “Hey- Mayra, you still there? I'm sorry, it's just been a long day. Kai got detention, you know, and God, I'm just so worried about him.”

“Kai's your son?” The idea of Qi Le, ever the rebel, being upset over her kid getting detention seemed hypocritical to me. 

“Yeah,” she admitted. “He's a little brat, but he tries his best. He goes to the school that replaced ours. Where are you? I'll come pick you up. We can chat in person. That is, if you want.”

“Tell me something first,” I murmured into the phone. “What was my last name?”

Qi Le scoffed. “It's been two decades, May. I don't remember things as good as I used to. Also, you still sound like a kid.” She exhaled loudly. “It was Brown, wasn't it? Mayra Brown.”

“Hmm,” I replied, noncommittal. “Mom? Pops?’

The people who called themselves my parents perked up. “Yeah, kiddo?”

“What's our last name?”

My father laughed. “Have you forgotten all that already? It's Brown. You used to say it was the colour of your hair.”

I smiled wanly. “QL? You still there?” The vague sound of water came from the phone.

“Yeah, just gotta wash the dishes. You need me to pick you up?” I could picture her, wearing gloves up to her elbows to protect her overly sensitive skin. The motherly tone in her voice matched nothing I ever remembered, however.

Damn, but I wanted to go… Home.

There. I said it. I missed home. I missed the world I had once lived in. I missed my family, my school and my friends. Perhaps, just perhaps, this had been home once. Certainly, if I squinted, it looked similar enough. But my friends had grown up, my school was torn down, my parents old and withered. 

The home I remembered was no more. But I could start over, just like Haru and Venn and all the other wanderers who had settled down. 

“No,” I said. “It's fine. I'm already home. Thanks for everything. Tell Betty to keep grooving, and hopefully without those fugly bell jeans.” Before she could respond, I hung up.

Turning to my parents, I threw my arms around my mother, then bent down to hug my father. “If you really are my parents,” I whispered, just loud enough to hear, “Then I'm grateful to see you again.”

With the same caution I had thrown to the wind earlier, I disentangled myself from them. They smelled different, of pills and age. My mother brushed my cheek slightly. “Come on, Mayra, and tell us everything.”

“Alright,” I said, and allowed myself to be led back home.

Taglist:

@coffeeangelinabox, @dorky-pals, @calliecwrites, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @shukei-jiwa

@thewingedbaron, @pluppsauthor, @cowboybrunch, @wylloblr, @possiblyeldritch @ramwritblr, @urnumber1star, @fortunatetragedy, @bigwipscholar, @ratedn

@vampirelover890, @possiblylisle, @illarian-rambling, @the-ellia-west

@finickyfelix, @evilgabe29, @glitched-dawn, @rivenantiqnerd, @dragonhoardesfandoms

@drchenquill, @everythingismadeofchaos, @owldwagitoutofyou, @oliolioxenfreewrites (Anyone else who wants to get added can tell me in the comments, pm me, or send me an ask about it!)

[sixeyes59]

Guys 💀

I've been roaming the internet in search for more "From" content and theories at 2 a.m. like the night monster I am, and, by a complete accident, have found the description of the season 3 finale by someone who claims to know it. Just imagine what I was fighting not to read it but eventually the voices won and I read it all. 🤠 Obviously I am not even hinting at where I found this information for y'all's own sanity, but what I can say is that it corresponds VERY well with the upcoming episodes' descriptions on Rotten Tomatoes 💀💀💀

I'm sorry, I'm really am, but this is the only way (👀🤡) for me to get this off my chest without spoiling anything:

- as I've predicted, WE ARE IN FOR SOME MAJOR SHIT 😭😭😭

- especially one particular plot element is going to be just bananas 😭 I cannot stop thinking about it and can't believe it, wow just wow (can't wait to make memes about it already)

- I was very wrong or very right about a certain thing depending on the future layout and revelations about it

- Elizabeth Saunders, Donna's actress, was 100% right about the next profound cliffhanger but it's going to be SO SATISFACTORY

- a major theory running amongst us is going to be revealed as hinted at to say the least

- I am surprisingly not mad in the slightest I've possibly spoiled for myself because if it's really what's going to happen then it's. SO. GOOD.

- and last but definitely not least, in the wise words of our beloved boy Jade:

*there was supposed to be Jade gif here but obviously I haven't found anything suitable 😒*

EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED AND THE WRITERS ARE DOING AN AMAZING JOB 😭🙏 That's what I've been saying all this time to all the disbelievers.

I apologise for behaving like the show itself and speaking in tongues of confusion but I've been lying for at least 15 minutes before making this post staring at my ceiling and I needed to get this off my chest 😭 (without sPOiLinG aLl tHe fUN) to anyone).

Again, take this with a grain of salt as what I read could obviously had been completely made up, I don't want to cause a stir. But having reread the Rotten Tomatoes' descriptions it's either all encrypted and corresponding with what the person wrote or even more is going to be well, going on. 😭 Let's buckle up out belts everyone.

I will give an update on this post whatever the come out is.

energy this fucking post has 🤡

me moments ago af

[horanghaejamjam]

Candlelight Dances - {XMH}

↪   Summary: It was a relationship that was destined to fail. He couldn’t betray his family and you were set to marry his brother. Despite this, fate had odd ways of working and you found yourself willing to do anything to be with Minghao, even if only for a night.

↪ Pairings: Vampire Prince Minghao x Reader

↪   Rating: M 18+

↪   Genre: Vampire Au / Forbidden Lovers / Smut / Fluff / Slight Angst

↪   Word Count: 18.1k

↪ Warnings/Contents: While the reader uses gender neutral terms, it is implied that they wear dresses and appear feminine. Vampire themes including biting, and blood drinking, Forbidden relationship, Mentions of arranged/forced marriage. Smut (minors dni), Unprotected sex, Switch!Hao and Switch!Reader (Mainly dom Hao), Semi public sex, Teasing with a paintbrush, Slight Primal/Prey aspects, Pet Names (Dove, Angel, Darling), Use of clothing as restraint, Nipple play, Oral (male receiving)

↪ Side Notes: If you saw this story before it is a repost! Tumblr ran into an issue with the other one and half of it basically disappeared so I had to repost it. Sorry for the spam y'all istg tumblr hates me.

This is a spinoff of my story Vampire Kisses with slight changes. While this can be read as a standalone there are some references to the other story. Also huge shoutout to the wonderful @xiubaek-13 for once again agreeing to beta read for me. I appreciate your input so much my dear.

This is also officially the longest story I've ever written. Words cannot describe my love for Minghao

↪ Click here to see my other Seventeen stories

↪ Click here for other kpop masterlists

↪ Click here to join my fic taglist

When you were younger, you never believed in the thought of love at first sight. You heard stories from friends and family, but you never believed that it could truly happen. Afterall, love was a very strong emotion, and you felt there was no way anyone could feel that without truly knowing who someone was. That value stuck with you into adulthood, and even more so when you found out about your arranged marriage. You were set to be wed to the first heir of a very influential vampire politician, a requirement by law to keep things balanced between humans and vampires. You had agreed, knowing your family would benefit from the union greatly, but it didn’t mean you were actually happy about it. You were doing this strictly for business, agreeing to marry a man you had never even seen before. How were you supposed to feel anything towards someone you knew nothing about? Little did you know that you would start questioning yourself the moment you moved into the Wen family manor. Before you knew it, you were falling head over heels, not for your fiancé, but for his younger brother. 

The moment you first met Minghao was vividly engraved in your mind, replaying like a movie scene on rewind. You had just begun to settle in and get used to the family when he and his brother, Junhui, had returned from a business matter. Minghao was, without a doubt, the most gorgeous being you had ever laid eyes on. From his long black hair that was tied back to show his sharp yet dark eyes, to his tall and slender figure dressed elegantly in a floor length coat. Even with the majority of his body hidden, you could already tell the rest of him was just as delicate and precise as his facial features. It gave him a mysterious aura which, combined with the confidence that radiated off his being, would normally intimidate you. In this case, however, it made him all the more alluring and you swore you felt your heart stop when he smiled kindly in your direction. You knew you were supposed to pay attention to Jun at that moment, but you couldn’t help your eyes from wandering back over to Minghao. 

From that moment forward, you found yourself seeking out the younger vampire's company whenever you could. At first it was just brief conversations in the hallway, then it was going for walks around the manor, until finally you found yourself sneaking out before the sun even went down to see him in his study. You learned a lot about him in that short amount of time, and by now you knew his schedule like the back of your hand. As the second son of the Wen family, he didn’t have as many obligations as his brother did. Most of his endeavors required assisting his family in diplomatic matters with a few side tasks here and there. When those were done, he preferred to spend his time working alone in his private study. He was usually up long before the rest of his family, already staining his clothes with paint before the sun even began to set. When you questioned him about it he simply said the daylight wasn’t a concern for him and he preferred the silence that daylight offered. He was always a man of few words so he didn’t really explain much more than that despite your curiosity. You decided not to question his strange schedule too much since it allowed you to spend more time with him without his family stealing your attention. 

You learned very quickly that Minghao had quite the eye for art and fashion, and he was extremely talented with a paintbrush. There were many nights where you found yourself curled up on the armchair he kept in the corner, watching quietly while he worked on his latest masterpiece. Occasionally he would glance back at you or ask your opinion of his work, but most of the time the two of you remained in comfortable silence until he decided to call it a night. Other nights you two would sit together and share a drink, simply talking about whatever came to mind at that moment. Minghao definitely enjoyed your presence, and you found yourself seeking his the longer you stayed with him. 

If anyone asked, you would lie and say that Minghao was helping you with your anxiety about the upcoming wedding. Not exactly a lie, but not quite the truth either. While his presence did relieve your worries, you also found that your heart beat for him in a way it never would for Jun. You wanted to be close to him, to talk with him, hear his voice, touch him, and be with him any chance you could. You couldn’t ignore the way his touch lingered on your skin, or the way his voice soothed you like a soft lullaby you would never tire of hearing. The way you could stare at him for hours, saying nothing but feeling that his presence said enough. There was still so much to learn about him, and yet you felt like you had known him for years. Your own personal mystery that you could unravel at your own pace if only you had the freedom to do so. Every time you were together, it was your own little paradise, and one you dreaded leaving every time the sun threatened to peek through his curtains. It was wrong, and you knew it, but sooner or later you would need to face the obvious truth: you were madly in love with Minghao. 

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“I had a feeling that I would find you here,” your head shot up from its spot between your knees to see the man that was currently occupying your thoughts. Minghao stood a few feet away from you, his familiar black coat flowing slightly in the breeze. He was standing under one of the many trees that lined the manors garden, the leaves shielding him from the few sun rays that started to peek over the horizon. You had been sitting tucked away behind the fountain, back pressed against the cool marble as you waited for the sun to rise, assuming that no one would follow you out. It seems you underestimated the youngest vampire though, since he was now staring down at you from his spot leaning against the tree, expression blank and his arms crossed over his chest. 

“What are you doing out here?” you asked as you scrambled to sit up, “the sun…”

“The sun is about to rise I know,” Minghao cut you off, “don’t worry I don’t plan on being out here long.” He picked himself up and walked over to where you were sitting, running a gloved hand through the water rushing out of the fountain before taking a seat beside you. “You startled everyone by running out earlier you know, I was going to wait for you to come back but after a while I got worried.”

“I’m sorry for running out like that, I didn't mean to scare you,” you muttered, “I guess I just got overwhelmed with all the sudden wedding planning.” The planning you were referring to being dress fitting and decorating that had been forced onto you when Jun got too busy. Minghao had volunteered to help you out given how much you two had bonded over design. It had seemed like a good idea at first, but you quickly became frustrated with the constant back and forth. That, combined with your mixed feelings for Minghao and the fact that he was helping prepare you to marry his brother created too much tension and before you knew it, you were rushing out the door and finding refuge in the garden. 

“That’s probably my fault,” Minghao sighed, resting a hand on your shoulder, “I was the one who got a bit too invested.” The leather of his glove felt much too thick against you, almost like a cruel reminder of the distance between you. You knew it was your own fault for falling in love with him when you were engaged to his brother, but if anything that made it harder on you. You were falling victim to your own feelings and there was nothing you can do about it.

“It’s not your fault,” you groaned, “it’s mine.” Minghao didn’t respond but the tightening grip on your shoulder let you know that he was listening. “This whole wedding has been really hard for me and I guess my emotions just got the best of me and I got overwhelmed,” you explained. Minghao hummed softly before pulling his hand away and sitting a bit straighter, the light splash from the fountain becoming a bit much for him to handle as you watched him wipe the back of his neck. You felt the soft mist as well, but if anything it was a welcome sensation that helped to calm your nerves. 

“Still I’m sure my pestering didn’t help so for that I apologize. I know this can’t be easy on you and it’s a lot to get used to, I just wanted to try and make it a bit easier.” You quickly shook your head at his apology. 

“Hao stop, nothing anyone does will make this easy on me.” You flinched as your words came out harsher than you intended, but if Minghao noticed he didn’t comment on it. 

“Why is that do you think?” he asked, causing you to sigh. You couldn’t tell if he genuinely had no idea how you felt or if he did and just didn’t want to admit it. 

“It’s complicated,” you muttered, “even if I wanted to tell you I probably couldn’t.” This time your words seemed to affect Minghao as you watched him frown slightly. He turned his head away and opened his mouth as if to say something but you cut him off. 

“It’s getting pretty bright out you know, aren’t you worried about the sun?” You looked up at the sky to see it was much lighter than before. Minghao mirrored your actions with a hand shielding his eyes, only to shrug slightly. 

“It’s not too bright out yet, I’ll be fine. I’m not as sensitive to the sun as my brother, remember?” he reminded. 

“I thought you just meant you preferred the brightness,” you confessed, “you never really explained that.” 

“What fun is it if I tell you everything right away?” Minghao teased, only to stiffen up a bit when you frowned at him, “But if you really want to know I am a halfblood vampire. Unlike my brother who was born a vampire, I was born a human and turned into a vampire when I got older. My body is still semi human because of this so I am not as sensitive to things like the sun. It will still hurt but nothing I can’t manage.” You were a bit caught off guard by his sudden honesty, but figured it was better to take advantage of it rather than question him. 

“I didn’t realize halfbloods were a thing, I thought you all were the same,” you confessed, “so does that technically make you, you know?”

“Adopted?” Minghao asked with a slight giggle, “You don’t have to be shy, I won't bite, but yes I am. My birth parents were humans who worked at the manor, and my current family took me in after they passed away.” 

“I’m sorry to hear that,” you sympathized. 

“Don’t be. That was many years ago and I barely remember them, these guys have always felt more like my family and I would do anything for them.”

“I guess in that way we are the same,” you mused, “I mean I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for my family.” Minghao sighed beside you, running a hand through his hair. 

“I know this situation isn’t the most ideal for you, but I encourage you to at least open up a bit. You are already part of the family to us, you just need to see that.” Minghao’s words echoed through your mind almost teasingly, a painful reminder of the situation you dragged yourself into. Family, that is all Minghao would ever see you as, his family. The woman who would soon marry his brother and be his sister, when you couldn’t help but wish he was the one you were marrying. You wanted nothing more than to confess that to him, have it where the wedding dress he was designing was for him and not for Jun, but you knew that couldn’t happen. You had made an agreement and you knew the political importance of your wedding. Jun was the heir of the Wen family and was required to marry a born human to keep a power balance between humans and vampires. You probably weren’t the first choice, but you were a young woman with no current political ties so to the Wens you were the perfect candidate. Minghao may still have the status of being related to the Wen family, but in terms of power he was still the bottom of the totem pole. It was something he seemed to enjoy since he had more freedom, but you couldn't help but wonder what would be different if you were allowed to choose which brother you would marry. 

“Can I ask you something?” hearing Minghao hum in reply you moved to face him properly, “You’re the second in command when Jun takes over right? So does that mean you’ll be in an arranged marriage as well?” His eyes widened slightly as your question caught him off guard, but that expression quickly changed into a smirk. 

“Why would you want to know something like that?” he teased, giggling slightly as you stuttered to try to come up with an explanation, “I’m just teasing Y/N relax. The marriage rule only applies to the head of the family. Honestly the rule doesn’t make much sense to me personally but it’s just how things run around here.”

“So it doesn’t apply to you then?” you clarify.

“No it doesn’t, I have no plans of taking over the family so I can marry whoever I want.” He locks eyes with you when he says that and you could have sworn you felt his demeanor change before he was clearing his throat and standing up. “I’d love to stay and talk more but I would prefer not to stay in the heat,” he explained. Most of his body was covered in his usual black attire, but you could see his cheeks and neck turning more red than normal. You quickly realized that the sun had fully emerged while you were talking and was probably taking its toll on the young vampire. 

“Sorry I shouldn’t have kept you outside so long,” you quickly apologized. 

“Don’t be, it was my decision to come after you,” Minghao assured, reaching out to pat your head softly, “I just don’t like the heat, and besides I do have a few things to finish before bed so I should really get back to work. I will see you later tonight Y/N,” and with that he was walking back to the manor, leaving you standing alone in the garden. You half debated running after him but decided against it, sitting back against the fountain and taking advantage of the daylight to be alone with your thoughts. 

You stayed out in the garden for what you assumed was a few more hours before eventually retiring back to your room. Closing and locking the door behind you, you quickly washed yourself off and got changed into more comfortable clothes before crawling into bed. You were actively trying to adjust to the nocturnal life living with vampires, and to do so you were taking more naps during the day. At first the sunlight had made it impossible to fall asleep, but eventually you got used to it with the help of blackout curtains that you often kept closed. With the comfortable darkness surrounding you, it didn’t take long for you to fall asleep, the conversation with Minghao still running through your mind. 

ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ

You woke up a few hours later to a soft knocking at your door. Groaning softly, you sat up and rubbed at your eyes before carefully slipping out of bed and walking over to the door. To say you were shocked to see Minghao standing at the door was an understatement. His coat had been discarded, exposing a white button up that he had partly undone and the sleeves rolled up to expose his arms. His hair was tied back as usual and his hands were covered in various colors of paint, letting you know that he’d probably been working this whole time. You couldn’t deny how attractive he looked like this, managing to look elegant even when he was supposed to be a mess. Meanwhile you literally had just rolled out of bed and probably looked like that, making you want to shy away from the young vampire's gaze. 

“Sorry did I wake you?” he asked, taking in your appearance. 

“Not at all,” you lied with a soft yawn, “I’m honestly surprised that you’re not asleep at this time though.”

“I got carried away with my work,” he admitted with a shy smile. You mirrored said smile as you saw him rub at the back of his neck, some of the still drying paint on his skin rubbing off onto his collar. This was a side of Minghao you didn’t get to see very often and it was honestly adorable. 

“I can see that,” you teased, making him giggle, “and I’m guessing that you’re not here to take a break?”

“You know me too well, I just wanted to show you something real quick if you are not too busy?” Minghao offered. Truth be told you were still exhausted from being suddenly woken up, but you weren’t about to turn him down, not when your time together had been cut short recently. 

“Not at all, just give me a second to get changed,” you said, already starting to close the door to your room when he stops you. 

“Don’t worry we won’t take too long so you can go back to sleep right after,” he assured, taking another moment to glance over you, “besides, the outfit really suits you.” You couldn’t tell if he was joking or not, but you still felt your cheeks heat up at the comment. Minghao noticed and laughed again, making you playfully slap at him. 

“Stop teasing me!” you whined. 

“I’m not, I swear!” he mused with another laugh. 

“Like hell you’re not!” you exclaimed with another hit at him. Minghao stepped back this time and grabbed your wrist before you could touch him. 

“Alright alright I’m sorry, but seriously are you coming with me or no?” He was still holding onto your wrist, gently tugging you away from the door and out into the hall before you even agreed. You gave in almost immediately, letting him tug you out fully before closing the door behind you. 

“Yes I’m coming, lead the way.” You agreed. Minghao hummed softly and dragged you down the hall and into the library before finally letting go of your wrist. You briefly mourned the loss of his touch but continued to follow him through the many bookshelves until you made it to a familiar door hidden in the corner of the room. The wooden frame was darker than the others and carved with an intricate design of leaves and vines meeting a blooming flower at the very top. The design was carved by Minghao himself, as was his name that was carved and painted perfectly in the middle of the door. Behind the door was Minghaos personal study/studio and the one place in the house he spent a majority of his time in. 

The interior was just as beautiful as the exterior, with the same high walls and pristine wooden floors as the rest of the library, save for the fur rug that lay in the middle of the floor. The room was often dark as Minghao preferred working in natural light provided by the glass doors that led out to a mini covered area of the garden. During the night the doors were often open to let the breeze and moonlight in, but right now they were closed and covered by dark red curtains to keep the light out. The only other light was provided by a mini lamp that rested on his desk in the middle of the room. The only other furniture aside from his desk and chair was the leather armchair that was tucked into the corner right behind it. Normally that chair was covered in various art supplies or clothing articles he was working on, but since you started spending more time with him that space was now left open for you. His art supplies had a new home in an organized pile by the double doors or on his desk, save for the canvas he had currently displayed in the middle of the room. You walked into the room before Minghao and made your way over to the canvas, which is what you assumed Minghao wanted to show you. 

The painting was clearly in the early stages, mostly just a blend of color and shapes at the moment. However, you could clearly make out the outline of what you assumed would be a couple. The male figure was just a pencil outline at the moment but the female was more defined. You could make out the black paint strokes as part of a dress and even if it wasn’t anywhere near completion yet you could easily tell the detail going into it. 

“I know it isn’t much right now,” Minghao’s voice snapped your attention away from the painting. He had walked over to his desk, leaning against the wood as he looked over your shoulder at his work. “This isn’t my normal style but I’ve been really inspired recently and figured I would try my hand at something new,” he explained. 

“It looks great so far, especially for a new style,” you complimented, “though I’m curious what inspired you to make something like this?” Minghao chuckled softly and you looked over just in time to see him shake his head. 

“That’s a secret for me to know and you to find out later, I’ll tell you when I’m finished but right now I just wanted your input on it.” He explained. You wanted to groan at him still being secretive but you knew there was no point in arguing with him. 

“You really are a mystery, you know that?” you mused, making him laugh again. 

“You wouldn’t be the only one to say that,” he commented. 

“Seriously though, do you ever get tired of being so secretive?" you asked. 

“Not really, it’s just who I am,” he replied, “I’m so used to keeping things to myself, when you see and experience the things I have, it becomes hard to trust other people. You are kind of the odd one out of that equation, that’s why I wanted to show you this first.” You nodded, still not getting the idea of why he wanted to show you this, but realizing it must be important to him.

“You don’t have to show me anything though,” you mumbled, following his movement with your eyes as he moved over to the opposite side of his desk, looking through one of the drawers. 

“I want to,” he whispered to himself. He grabbed a pencil and made his way back to the canvas in the center of the room, starting to sketch a few lines into it. His back was covering the piece and you weren’t able to see it, causing you to move closer so you could peek around his frame. You watched for a moment as he tried sketching a few more details on the female's face before giving up and quickly erasing them, careful not to touch the paint. “I have a vision in my head but haven’t been able to properly portray it on paper,” he explained. “This piece is a present for someone so I want it to be perfect.”

“A present?” you echoed, “for who?”

“Someone very important to me, I can’t reveal who they are at this time but just know this needs to be perfect.”

“I see,” you muttered quietly, crossing your arms over your chest, “so that’s why you’ve been so secretive lately.”

“Yes and no,” Minghao muttered, not taking his eyes off of his sketch, “normally I don’t let people see my personal work but you are a bit of an exception, I figured you could help me.”

“Why me though?”

“You ask a lot of questions, you know that?” he responded to your question with one of his own, “because you’re the one person I can trust. This kind of stuff makes me really nervous, you know.”

“Nervous?”  you question, poking lightly at his shoulder, “that’s pretty honest for someone who's so mysterious,” you teased. He didn’t look at you but you could hear him try to suppress a soft giggle. 

“I’m not trying to be mysterious,” he confessed, “I just haven’t had the time to properly adjust and be myself with the new environment.”

“Well, you’re still young,” you recalled, “especially for a vampire if I remember correctly."

“Exactly, the transition isn’t exactly the easiest process to go through,” he lamented, “I know it was in my best interest but that doesn’t make losing your humanity any easier.” You were silent for a moment, this is the most open he’s ever been with you since you first moved here, and you weren’t even sure if he realized that. Still you wanted to take advantage of this honest side of Minghao, desperate to finally learn more about him. 

“Well there’s nothing wrong with being a bit reclusive. It’s a really powerful trait you know.” you smiled, watching him try to sketch out another piece of the canvas.

“I think I just want people to understand that there’s more to me than they think.” Minghao said, gripping his pencil tightly.

“Like what?” you urged, he opened his mouth to say something before quickly closing it. You sighed at the realization you weren’t going to get a genuine answer to that question, “nevermind don’t worry about it.”

“Sorry,” he apologized, “that’s something I need to keep to myself for now. You’ll know when the time is right.”

“If you say so,” you sighed, brushing a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“Anyways,” Minghao quickly changed the subject, returning your attention to his work, “you never did tell me what you think of the current piece.” You nudged him out of the way slightly to get a better look. Your eyes trailed across the figures on the canvas, feeling an odd sense of familiarity between them but not knowing why. 

“It looks great so far, I can’t tell what you’re going for yet because it’s not drawn out but I like the detail I see.” you praised. 

“Like I said it is still a work in progress,” he reminded, “but I think I’m starting to notice my vision so thank you.”

“Really, I only said one thing?” you challenged. 

“You helped more than you know,” he said, returning to his space in front of the canvas. His hand brushed over your arm as he nudged you to the side, and you could have sworn that you felt it linger there a bit longer than normal. His feather light touch sent tingles down your spine and made you want to reach out to him, but his voice snapped you out of your thoughts. “I really should get back to work and I’m sure you want to go back to bed.” You couldn’t help but let your disappointment show, sighing softly as you nodded and pushed away from him. 

“You’re right I should go, sorry for bothering you for so long.” you muttered, staring at the ground as you began walking to the door. You had just put your hand on the doorknob when Minghao called out to you. 

“Hey Y/N?”

“Yeah?” you turned around, a bit too eagerly for your liking to see Minghao staring back at you. His bottom lip was trapped between his teeth and he looked almost nervous, refusing to meet your gaze. 

“I- you know what nevermind it’s not important, have a good rest.” Just as quickly as he called out for you he was turned back to his work, sketching at the page with a newfound determination. You slumped down a bit, but decided to leave him be, quietly slipping out of the office and leaning against the door once it closed. 

“Minghao, why do you have to be so complicated?”

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Unfortunately it seemed you wouldn’t get an answer to your question, as Minghao basically began to avoid you after that day. You weren’t invited to his office anymore, and any time you tried to speak to him he dashed away faster than you could blink. It didn’t help that the Wen family started to insist you be more involved with wedding planning, so the minimal free time you had was now spent working with Jun. You tried to be nice to him, knowing that it wasn’t his fault you were in this mess, but you couldn’t help but get frustrated. You had been so close to finally getting Minghao to open up to you, his words replaying in your mind tirelessly, only to have it ripped away from you painfully. Now you may never get another chance because you were stuck listening to his older brother whine about some decoration for the tables you couldn’t care less about. 

“Hey Y/N, are you listening?” you snapped out of your mini sulking session to see Jun staring down at you. His eyes were soft but the frown he wore told you he was worried. If there was one obvious difference you noticed between the vampire brothers, it was that Jun was a thousand times more expressive. 

“I wasn’t sorry, what did you say?” you admitted, feeling bad that you ignored him. Instead of answering you though, Jun turned to face his mother instead. 

“Would you excuse us for a moment, I think Y/N needs a second to clear their head.” You didn’t hear Mrs. Wens reply but assumed she agreed as Jun quickly took your hand and escorted you out of the dining room. 

“I’m sorry,” you apologized as he dragged you out. 

“Don’t be, I figured we could both use a break,” he assured, “come on a walk with me, there’s something I want to talk to you about.” You could feel your blood run cold when he said that, immediately assuming the worst. That he knew about you and Minghao and you were about to get in trouble, or that he would call off everything and your family would be stuck with nothing again. “Relax, it's nothing bad, I can hear your heartbeat all the way over here,” Jun teased, smiling back at you to get you to relax a little bit. It worked, if only partially and you took a deep breath as he led you down the hall and into an area of the manor you had never been before. 

“Wait where are we going?” you asked, to which he only shook his head. 

“Patience little one, you’ll see in a second.” The two of you continued walking for a moment before stopping at a large set of double doors. Opening them revealed a large, mainly empty ballroom. The floors seemed newly polished and the only furniture visible was the grand piano that rested elegantly in the corner. The rest of the room was open, clearly giving the space for people to dance and mingle. The room was lined with multiple floor length windows, the curtains currently pulled back to allow moonlight to flood through. The only other light source you could point out were the candle holders that also lined the walls, though they were currently empty which left the moon to light up the room. 

“Wow, I didn’t know this room existed,” you mused, stepping into the middle and twirling around so you could take in everything. 

“We usually keep this room closed off unless we need it for parties,” Jun explained as he closed the doors behind him, “however Hao and I used to come in here a lot when we were younger.” He took your curious glance as a sign to continue, walking over to where the piano was, “We both grew up in this house so as kids we loved playing in here. Then once we got older and he joined the family we would just use this space to talk or think. I even tried teaching him to play the piano once but he wasn’t a big fan.” A few skillful presses of the keys sent a beautiful melody echoing through the room, answering your unspoken question of if Jun could really play the piano. It was at this moment you realized you had never really taken interest in the heir to the Wen family, so focused on trying to keep Minghao’s attention. 

“I didn’t know you could play the piano,” you commented, making him chuckle slightly. 

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, though I just figured you weren’t interested since you spend all your time with my brother.” Your eyes widened at his comment, quickly stuttering to try and think of an explanation, only for Jun to silence you with a wave of his hand, “relax darling I’m just messing with you. I’ve known there was something between the two of you since the first week you got here, you’re not exactly the best at sneaking around here you know. ”

“Wait, you’re not mad?” you asked in shock, making him shrug.

“Why would I be?”

“Because I’m engaged to you?” you reminded, as if there was any possibility that he had forgotten that fact. 

“True but I’m not dumb you know, I know that this marriage is only for political reasons. Now if we were marrying out of love I would have been mad but you can’t force someone to love you if they never did to begin with.” 

“Well when you put it that way it just makes me feel bad.” you whined. 

“You can’t control your feelings Y/N, if you love Minghao just tell me,” Jun pushed, “the truth is going to come out sooner or later anyways.” You wanted to deny it for the sake of keeping things civil but you knew there was no point, Jun had already seen through you. 

“Fine you caught me, I love him,” you confessed, “so what? It doesn’t change anything does it?” You could see Juns expression fall and he sighed as he took a seat on the bench in front of the piano, still facing you but with his hands propping up his head. 

“Part of me wants to say that it does but honestly I don’t know,” he confessed, “this tradition has been around ever since my family came into power. As the heir to the family I have to marry a human in order to keep things balanced and vampires are like swans, we mate for life. I don’t want to force you into a loveless marriage but I am also obligated to go through with this for the sake of my family.” He noticed the way your expression fell with each word, having to bite his tongue from saying something that may upset you more. “I’m sorry if there was a way for me to end this and let you be with him I would do it.”

“It’s not your fault,” you assured him, “if anything it’s mine for getting too close to him in the first place. Besides, even if you could put a stop to the marriage it wouldn’t change much.”

“What makes you think that?” he asked. You paused for a moment and debated answering, since they were brothers after all and you didn’t want to risk him telling Minghao how you felt. However, your thoughts have been consuming you recently and this may be the only time you would have someone to talk to about it. 

“I don’t think he feels the same way,” you confessed, “something changed recently and now he won’t even look at me, it’s like we’re complete strangers and I don’t understand why.” Jun remained silent, raising an eyebrow for you to continue, which you hesitantly did, “I thought we were getting closer. There was one night where he finally started to open up to me, talking about how hard things were and this painting he was working on. However when he went to ask me something he just kind of shut down and asked me to leave, and I haven’t heard from him since.” Jun didn’t say anything for a moment, taking the time to truly process your words. You watched his lips slowly curve up into a smile before he started laughing.

“You really are a bit naive, you know that?” he teased, cutting you off before you could ask what that was supposed to mean, “Y/N you know as well as I do that Hao is a bit of a mystery. His heart is in the right place but he doesn’t always know how to express that properly so he gets shy. You just have to be patient and slowly break down his walls, because trust me he’s the sweetest guy I know once you get through to him.”

“Well of course you’d say that, you’re his brother.” you said with a soft laugh. 

“Yes but before I was his brother I was his best friend and I’ve been in the same situation you are in currently. I want to say we were 16 or 17 when I finally got him to open up to me. Not to dissuade you though because I’m pretty sure you managed to make more progress than I have in only a few weeks.” 

“You really think that?” you asked, wanting to believe him but also still being unsure of yourself. 

“I know it,” Jun assured, standing up and making his way over to you, “look Y/N I don’t want to get your hopes up about anything because neither of us can go against our family. That being said, I think you owe it to both yourself and Hao to be honest with him about how you feel.” 

“I want to, I really do, but what good will it do if we can’t be together?” you confessed. Jun smiled sadly at you and reached out to squeeze your shoulder.

“Like I said, no promises, but there may be a few strings we can pull so everything works out,” he whispered, almost as if he was telling you a forbidden secret. In all honesty, he probably was as he was basically confessing to willingly trying to go behind his parents backs. It wasn’t something you had time to question however, as Jun squeezed your shoulder one last time before walking past you to the doors. “I have to get back before mom gets too suspicious, but you’re welcome to stay here and think about what I said. I’ll tell her that you were tired and went to bed early.”

“Thank you Jun.” you called out, looking back at him over your shoulder. 

“Don’t thank me just yet,” he warned, “also do me a favor and make sure the room is still clean when you leave, my family will have my head if we let it get messed up.” With that he left you alone, letting the door click softly behind him. You let your gaze fall onto the piano bench for a moment, where he had been sitting, before turning your attention to one of the large windows. It looked almost like a door and you could see a small balcony behind it, much like the one in Minghao’s study. The thoughts of Minghao and what Jun said flooded your thoughts as you moved towards the window on autopilot. Your fingers traced gently over the frame before finding the latch and undoing it to let the glass pane swing open. The soft breeze tickled your face as you pushed the door open enough to slip past and make your way out onto the balcony. Despite the soft breeze, the night air was warm, a contrast to the cool marble railing that you leaned against. Unlike the study, this view reached out to the front of the manor, allowing you to view the main courtyard and the road that lay just beyond the large gates. In the distance you could see the lights from the city, the place you used to call home before your arrangement with the Wen family. Bittersweet memories they were, as when you first moved in you found yourself longing to go back home to your friends and family. You hadn’t spoken to any of them in months, and likely wouldn’t until your wedding day, so you hoped they were alright. At the same time though, you had slowly grown used to living in the manor, so now it was the city that felt foreign to you. Even when you did go out, it was usually at night and accompanied by one of the staff or family friends. One wouldn’t think a city run by vampires would be much different than that of humans but they would be mistaken. Most of the shops were the same with a few minor adjustments, but the atmosphere felt significantly different. You didn’t know how to describe it, but the world of vampires felt more polished in a sense. At first you were worried you would never get used to it, but now you didn’t want to leave it. 

“It’s quite the view isn’t it?” whipping your head around, you were shocked to see Minghao standing behind you. His body leaned against the wall with his hands tucked into the pockets of his coat. His hair was down for once, allowing you to really see how long it was. His bangs were pushed out of his face but a few strands rested in front of his eyes, the rest tickling his neck as the wind pushed it back, though if you had to guess it was almost to his shoulders. You couldn’t help but mentally curse this man for looking more beautiful every time you saw him. 

“Hao,” you muttered as you finally got control of yourself, “what are you doing here?” 

“Ran into Jun in the hallway, he told me I could find you here.” he explained. 

“Were you looking for me?” you asked, albeit a bit too eagerly. 

“Actually I was,” he confessed, “I feel like I owe you an apology, I know I’ve been acting pretty strange recently and I didn’t want you thinking it was your fault.” Those words came as both a relief and a surprise to you. At the same time though, you couldn’t help but worry that he was only doing this because Jun ratted you out. 

“Jun didn’t set you up to this, did he?” you asked, making him huff a bit. 

“Darling he didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know, so no I came after you myself.” You couldn’t help but blush at the nickname, something Minghao clearly noticed. You were about to ask what exactly Jun told him when he turned to look back inside the ballroom, “Come inside with me for a minute, I want to show you something.” To say you were confused would be an understatement, especially since the way he was acting was pretty out of character for him. Still you didn’t say anything as you followed him back inside, making sure to close and lock the door behind you. Minghao motioned for you to stand in the middle of the room as he grabbed a small box from his coat pocket, which you quickly realized was a box of matches. “This used to be my favorite room in the whole house,” he explained, lighting one of the candles before putting the match out and trailing the wall to light the rest, moving quickly but cautiously. “As the decades go by the house has become more and more modern to fit the changing times. This is the only room that has remained perfectly untouched since its construction,” he explained, “I don’t mind the modern touch of course, but there is something so elegant and romantic about a candlelit ballroom don’t you think?”

“It is rather beautiful, I can only imagine how extravagant the events hosted here are.” you commented, taking your eyes off of Minghao to glance across the room once again. 

“There are not many as we save it for the most important milestones but they definitely are something,” Minghao agreed, setting the last candle back into its holder. The room was now lit with a soft glow, the shadows dancing as the flames flickered softly. “I’ve been around for a few but one in particular will always be my fondest memory.” he continued. 

“Oh, what would that be?” you asked. 

“For my parents the day I was turned and initiated into the family was a big deal,” he explained, undoing his coat and walking over to the piano, “they threw a large ball for me in this room to celebrate, almost like a coming of age ceremony I guess. It wasn’t the easiest transition for me so that celebration meant a lot to me and I will never forget the first dance I had on this ballroom floor.” He paused for a minute to lay his coat down on the bench, revealing a maroon red sweater he had tucked into his usual black pants. You had never seen Minghao in any color other than black and white, and the contrast of the red against the rest of him was striking. “The first dance was with my mother,” he continued as he brushed his hands across the piano keys, “all eyes were on us as a special song played, I still remember the melody like it was yesterday.” Minghao lightly pressed on a few of the keys, the melody sounding quite familiar to the one Jun played earlier, only this time it kept playing when he pulled his hand away. The song continued as if someone was playing the piano, a distinct melody that made Minghao smile as he walked away. You weren’t sure whether to be in awe of the song or shocked by the seemingly magic piano. “What, never seen a self playing piano before?” Minghao teased when he noticed your expression. 

“Evidently not,” you exclaimed, “how on Earth is it even doing that?” 

��Simple mind trick,” Minghao explained as if it was nothing, “all I have to do is focus on the song and it’ll do what I want.”

“So what, you’ve been able to move things with your mind this whole time?” you questioned, wondering why you never knew of this ability until now. 

“Yes and no, I wouldn’t even begin to know how to explain it but that’s beside the point,” he brushed it off again as he walked back over to you, “do you know how to dance?” The question took you by surprise, looking at him as if he just asked you what the meaning of life was. 

“Come again?” 

“It’s a yes or no question dear, do you know how to dance?” Minghao repeated, smiling a bit as you nodded your head. 

“A little bit but I haven’t danced with anyone for years.” you confessed. 

“Don’t worry little dove, I will lead the way,” he said with a smirk, extending his hand to you with a soft bow, “may I have this dance?” You were really starting to question if this is the same Minghao you had spoken to a few days prior. His whole demeanor was different and there was an air of confidence to him that you had never seen before. It was like a switch was flipped inside of him and now he was finally opening up and showing you his true self, which you had to assume was Juns doing. Still, you didn’t want to throw away this chance with him so you quickly took his hand and allowed him to guide you into a steady waltz. 

It was a bit rough for you at first, not remembering the moves and getting stiff every time you misstepped which only made Minghao laugh. “Just relax, feel the moment.” he repeated each time until he finally felt you do so. You closed your eyes and focused on the song playing as Minghao guided your movements, until you were both in perfect sync with each other. Minghao hummed softly to the melody as he pulled you closer, wrapping his arm around your waist and pressing your body into his chest as your dance turned into simple swaying. Almost out of instinct, you leaned further into him and rested your head on his shoulder, taking in the sweet scent of roses and a hint of red wine that radiated off of him. Even through the sweater you could feel him, the way his body was cooler but seemed to take in the warmth from your touch. How his own heart wasn’t beating but you could feel your own pulse through his touch, as if he was molding to you. Minghao didn’t push you away, instead he welcomed the almost embrace as you two swayed together, taking in your own scent and closing his eyes. By this point the music had stopped but neither of you seemed to care. This is the closest he had ever been to you, and sadly it was the closest he would probably ever be. 

“I’ve never been this close with anyone outside of my family.” he confessed after a moment, his voice nearly a whisper. Your eyes opened at his words, but you didn’t dare to pull away from him. 

“So why me then?” you asked, almost afraid of hearing the answer. 

“You’re special,” he confessed, “you make me discover parts of myself and feel things that I didn’t know existed. I didn’t know how to handle it, I couldn’t even bring myself to tell you because I was so scared and confused. That’s why I shut you out, because I had hoped if I did that these feelings would go away and things would go back to normal.”

“But they didn’t.” you said, not having to ask since this moment was proof enough. 

“No they didn’t,” he agreed, “and then Jun came into my room and told me what you said, and how you felt and I knew I had to say something, I couldn’t have you getting the wrong idea.” He pulled away from you just enough so that he could look down at you, his eyes carrying every unspoken emotion he was feeling. You were positive that you looked no different, wondering if you were dreaming. Not even a day ago you would have been positive that Minghao hated you, and yet now he was here holding you and looking at you like you were his whole world. It almost felt like too much for you to handle. “Y/N?” he said, getting your attention, “that day in my study, what I wanted to tell you was-’

“You don’t have to say it Minghao, I already know.” you cut him off. He opened his mouth to protest but you cut him off again this time by grabbing his collar and pulling him down so your lips connected. He let out a surprised yelp at the action nearly backing away until he processed what was happening. You reached up to run your hand through his hair just as he relaxed and began to kiss you back, his arm tightening around your waist as the other reached up to cup your cheek. His touch was cold, but you ignored that in favor of focusing on how soft his skin was. His hair glided easily through your fingers and you heard him giggle as you played with the ends, tickling him slightly. His kisses were just as soft, but you could still feel the passion behind them, especially as his fangs poked out to graze at your lower lip. The sensation made you gasp and that was when Minghao finally pulled away, allowing you a moment to catch your breath. He had a shy smile on his face and you were positive he would be blushing if he could, while you felt like you could melt on the spot from how hot your face was. 

“That was definitely unexpected.” he said with a shy giggle. 

“Did you not like it?” you asked, almost afraid that you went too far. 

“No no, I loved it,” he promised, stroking your cheek with his thumb, “I just never expected you to react that way.” You leaned into his touch and closed your eyes, wanting to savor the moment for as long as possible. 

“I’ve been wanting to do that since I first met you,” you confessed, “I love you Minghao, I would want nothing more than to spend every day like this with you.” You had expected him to reciprocate your feelings since you had assumed that’s where this night was leading, but instead you were met with silence. Minghao didn’t say anything which made you open your eyes again. His expression had fallen and he looked almost defeated. 

“I had a feeling you would say that.” he whispered, slowly letting go and backing away from you. You tried to reach back out for him but he avoided your touch. 

“Hao, what’s wrong?” you asked, your heart pounding as you mentally begged him to come back, not to pull away from you again. You finally had him, you didn’t want to let go of him now, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. 

“I’m so sorry Y/N,” he apologized, turning his gaze to the floor so he wouldn’t have to face you, “this may have been a mistake.”

“What do you mean by mistake?” you practically shouted, unable to hide the pain in your voice, “what the hell were these last few hours then, everything you just said? You can’t honestly tell me that you didn’t feel anything this whole time!��� 

“What? Of course I felt something I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t,” he tried to defend, his voice raising a pitch despite his calm composure. “Look I’m sorry but I can’t let this go any further, if my parents found out about this then…”

“That’s what this is about?” you cut him off, “you can’t be honest with your feelings because of some stupid tradition with your parents? Who cares what they think, Minghao? It’s just a stupid wedding. I'm sure they can find someone else if they really needed to.”

“I care, Y/N!” he exclaimed, “to you this may not seem like a big deal but to me it is. I owe my life to my family because if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t even be here talking to you right now. You think it’s easy for me to sit here and be a bystander watching you give yourself to my brother when I would give anything to be in his place? I love you I really do, but I can’t betray my family like this, not after everything they’ve done for me.” By the time he finished talking he was stiff, shoulders bouncing as if he was out of breath and his eyes had an unfamiliar red tint to them. You took a few steps back, having never seen him this worked up before. Normally you would have been over the moon to hear Minghao say he loved you, but now it felt like a knife stabbing into your heart. By this point you were crying, tears streaming freely down your cheeks that you didn’t bother to hide. The sight pained Minghao, and he wanted nothing more than to reach out and brush them away, but he knew he shouldn’t. 

“You know,” you finally spoke after a moment, “if you really loved me you would put your pride aside and actually fight for me instead of shutting me out like everyone else.” It was cruel to say that and you knew it, but you were hurting and you wanted him to feel the same pain you were, if not more. Minghaos jaw tightened at your words, refusing to look at you as he regained his composure. 

“And here I thought you would be different.” he muttered to himself, but you were able to hear him clearly. His words didn’t have time to process before the room went cold and dark. As quickly as he had appeared, Minghao was gone, the sudden gust of wind and slamming of the door the only indication that he had even been there. You looked up at the candles, watching the smoke rise up from them before falling to your knees and sobbing. You felt suddenly trapped in the large room, suffocated by the darkness as you hugged yourself and continued to cry, not caring if anyone heard you. You wanted to scream and beg for Minghao to come back but you couldn’t, he was gone and now you were positive that he wasn’t coming back. 

ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ

Sure enough, you didn’t see Minghao for nearly a month after that night. You knew he was there, as you overheard the staff speak about him and could hear him working in his study any time you passed by. A few times you had knocked on the door, apologizing through the wood and begging for him to let you in, but he never answered. It was evident he was avoiding you, and while you wanted to be mad at him, you couldn’t lie and say you didn’t miss him. 

You weren’t sure if he told Jun what happened, but it was clear the older at least knew something was up judging by the sad smile he gave you whenever he saw you looking around. He never spoke to you directly though, only ever giving you gentle pats on the head or shoulder whenever he walked by you. You were half tempted to ask him if he knew something, but with the wedding only moments away it was impossible to get the oldest son alone. You were starting to feel like you were back to how things were when you first moved in. You were confused, frustrated, and, worst of all, alone. You also started distancing yourself as much as possible, locking yourself in your room whenever you weren’t needed for wedding planning. Mrs. Wen had noticed your behavior and tried asking you once at dinner if everything was alright, but all you could do was tell her you had a lot on your mind and left it at that. 

Tonight was one of the nights you were staying locked in your room, curled up on your bed staring out the window when you heard a knock at your door. At first you ignored it, assuming it was one of the staff, until the knocking got more frequent. Groaning, you forced yourself to get off the bed and make your way to the door, opening it to reveal a very frantic Jun. 

“About time you opened the door.” he whined, pushing past you and into your room. 

“Well hello to you too,” you uttered sarcastically, closing the door again, “I thought you guys needed to be invited in to enter a place?” 

“First off, that is an awful stereotype of us, and second of all it’s my house I can enter any room I want,” he pointed out. 

“Fair enough I guess, but why are you here?” you asked, crossing your arms. 

“You know if I didn’t know better I’d think you hated me,” he whined before straightening up again, “but last time I checked you also wanted my help with Minghao correct?” That got your attention and you immediately perked up.

“Are you saying you actually can help me?” you asked, suddenly hopeful. 

“I’m not 100% sure but there’s a chance it will work,” Jun explained, “do you remember when I told you that vampires mate for life?”

“Yeah, why?” you asked, confused as to what he was getting at. 

“Well there’s a process for that,” he explained, “I probably should have told you this earlier because it would be part of our wedding, but we claim our mates with a bite that seals our bond. Normally we do this during a certain point called a blood moon because the energy is higher.”

“First off that sounds like something wolves would do, not you guys,” you point out, “secondly yeah knowing that earlier would have been nice.”

“I’m going to ignore the wolf comment for now but yeah I’m sorry for not telling you,” he brushed you off, “but long story short if the mating ceremony is done outside of a blood moon usually that means the bond between us fails. However, if the feelings between a vampire and their mate is strong enough then it can work, and we would never break a mated couple apart.” It was finally starting to click with you what he was saying, a look of realization brushing over your features. 

“So what you are saying is that if I end up mating with Minghao, we can call off the wedding?” you questioned, “No offense to you of course.” 

“None taken.” Jun assured, “But yes if your bond is strong enough my family will have no choice but to accept it. However, if it doesn’t work then there’s nothing else we can do and it’ll be over.” 

“What are the chances of it working?” you asked.

“I’m not sure, I’ve never witnessed it myself, only heard of it.” he confessed. You knew it was a huge risk, but the more you thought about it the more it was a risk you were willing to take. If it meant you had a shot with Minghao, you would have been crazy not to try. 

“It’s worth a shot.” you stated, already making your way to the door to go find Minghao. 

“Hold up,” Jun stopped you, “you can’t just make him bite you, it doesn't work that way, the emotional bond has to be there as well.” That made you pause for a moment, given the fight you guys had, you didn’t even know if Minghao wanted to be around you anymore. 

“Emotional bond, got it,” you repeated with a deep breath, “well, wish me luck I guess.”

“Don’t overthink it Y/N, you got this!” Jun called out after you, but by that point you were already out of the room. You needed to do this now, while you were still determined and not psyching yourself out. 

The library seemed much colder than you remembered it to be, though perhaps that was your imagination. The welcoming atmosphere that usually invited you was replaced with a distant sense of dread. It hit you like a splash of ice water and made you freeze for a moment, almost debating turning around and returning to the comfort of your room for the night. However, you were determined to finish what you started, so you took a deep breath before continuing on your path. Almost on autopilot you navigated through various bookshelves and desks until you reached the familiar wooden door. You didn’t bother knocking, inviting yourself in and gently closing the door behind you. 

Minghao wasn’t at his desk like he normally was, instead you found him leaning against the wall as he looked out through the floor length window into the garden. His body was turned towards you, but his gaze remained focused on the view before him, giving you the perfect view of the man you loved. His shirt was still tucked in, though the first few buttons were undone and his sleeves were rolled up past his elbow, his cloak having been tossed carelessly onto his chair. One hand was tucked in his pocket while the other was mindlessly twirling a wine glass. His rings shone in the light and casted a reflection on the glass, only covered by the sloshing of the remaining red liquid inside. His expression was as sharp and stoic as ever, but you knew him well enough to know he was hiding something. There was a distance in his eyes, gazing at nothing as he was lost in his own thoughts. His bangs fell into his eyes and cast a shadow over his face, something he normally hated but right now didn’t seem to bother with. He looked just as beautiful as he always did, but you could tell he was hurting and that made your own heart hurt in return. 

Minghao knew you were there, he could sense your presence before you even walked into his study. The familiar aura you carried that had once been warm and inviting, but was now a dull blade stabbing at him every time he even thought of getting close to you. You could feel it too, the distance that had torn you apart over the last few weeks, the pain of wanting him to hold you and promise he’ll never leave but knowing he couldn't. You knew that he saw you, his eyes flicking over to you if only for a moment before returning back to the window. He didn’t move or make any effort to acknowledge you, merely pretending like you weren’t there. It hurt to be ignored by him this way, though you figured that you deserved it. Honestly you didn’t know what reaction you had been expecting after what happened, but you weren’t prepared for it to hurt this much. Perhaps coming here was a bad idea after all, that’s what you told yourself with a defeated sigh. You were about to turn and leave when you heard the male clear his throat. Looking back, you watched as Minghao straightened up and finished the rest of his wine before finally speaking.

“What are you doing here?” his voice was cold and emotionless, and you hated the way you flinched at it. 

“Hao I-” you froze, not sure what exactly you were supposed to say. He didn’t respond, merely keeping his gaze on you as he moved back to his desk, setting the empty glass to the side as he sat down, resting his chin on his hand. You took a moment to look around the room, realizing how much of a mess it was. His art supplies were carelessly scattered all over the place, and you noticed the painting he was working on had disappeared. Even his desk was a mess of random notes and sketches. You tried to glance at them but he noticed and quickly swiped them out of your view. “What happened to your painting?” you asked, glancing back at the mess where it had once been. 

“I lost my muse.” he replied flatly, “You didn’t answer my question.” You hated how cold he was being, but you supposed you deserved it. 

“I needed to see you.” you confessed. 

“Want to yell at me more? Toss my emotions aside?” he scoffed, though you could hear the pain lingering in his voice. 

“No, I came to say I’m sorry, I never should have yelled at you like that. I let my emotions take control and I know that I can’t take back what I said but I need you to know that I didn’t mean it, and I’m sorry.” Your apology took him by surprise, a startled noise getting caught in his throat as he sat up. 

“I see,” he muttered softly, “I appreciate the apology, and I am sorry too, what happened that night was my fault. I shouldn’t have let things drag on.” You sighed softly and made your way over to him, kneeling down on the other side of his desk and reaching for his hand. He stiffened up a bit, but didn’t stop you which you took as a positive sign. 

“I did mean one thing though, I love you Minghao and I’m not giving up on you.” you said, making him sigh. 

“I love you too Angel, I really do, but I told you we can’t let this go further.”

“I know that once the wedding happens it’ll be over, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have right now,” you argued, “one night Minghao, that’s all I’m asking for.” He raised an eyebrow at you, urging you to continue, “I want a redo of the night we spent in the ballroom. I want you to dance with me for real and not pull away from me. After that I will leave you alone but please the least you can do is give me that.” Minghao took a moment to ponder what you were asking, absentmindedly rubbing the back of your hand with his thumb. 

“This is dangerous, you do know that right?” he asked after a moment, shaking his head when you nodded, “We could get in a lot of trouble for this.”

“I’ve thought a lot about this, I just can’t let you slip away from me anymore.” you said, determined to make him listen. 

“You’re after something aren’t you?” he realized, you didn’t want to give away your intentions but you couldn't help but smirk a bit which was the only response he needed. Another moment of silence passed and for a moment you were worried that he would reject you, but finally you saw him nod his head. 

“Fine, this is the least I can do I suppose,” he agreed, “meet me in the ballroom tomorrow at sundown, if you’re not there by the time the sun sets fully I’ll leave.” You couldn’t help but smile at his agreement, squeezing his hand softly before standing up. 

“Thank you, I’ll be there I promise!”

ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ

The ballroom felt even bigger than before, but maybe that was due to your nerves. This was your last chance to get Minghao, and if you failed then you would lose him, probably for good. The thought alone was enough to hurt you and it hadn’t even happened yet. Your shoes clicked softly on the polished floor as you stepped inside, glancing around the room. Minghao had definitely been here already, the candles lit, some of the curtains pulled back to cast shadows on the floor from the still setting sun. The piano was even playing already, a new melody that you never heard before. It was beautiful for sure, but also more melancholic than the one that had played when you first danced with Minghao. Speaking of, the vampire in question was nowhere to be seen. Spinning around the room once, then twice, you trailed your eyes over every corner in hopes to see him, but there was nothing. Minghao was nowhere to be seen, and you couldn’t help but deflate a bit at the thought that he left already, despite the fact the sun was still out. 

“I was wondering when you would show up,” startled, you twirled around to see him only a few feet behind you, appearing practically out of thin air. He was dressed in all black, even having the shade brushed lightly on his eyes to make them pop. The only color being the jewels that decorated his ears and fingers, twinkling against the candlelight. You were used to seeing Minghao in all black, but something about the way he looked now made him even more beautiful. 

“Where did you come from?” you asked, “I swore no one was here when I walked in.” 

“Hiding in the shadows is pretty easy, just needed to make sure this wasn’t a trick.” 

“Why would I trick you?”

“I know you’ve been talking with my brother,” he replied, “who knows what you two have been up to.” Before you could argue that there was nothing, he was speaking up again, “It doesn’t matter though, you are here now so, shall we?” He offered his hand to you, much like he did the last time and you quickly took it, falling into step with him as you began swaying to the rhythm. It didn’t take long for the dance to pick up, and the two of you were soon gliding across the floor, matching each other's movements perfectly and falling in sync with ease. Minghao seemed a bit stiff at first, being so close to you, but he soon relaxed as the melody from the piano became softer, almost hypnotic. You closed your eyes for a moment and just allowed yourself to feel the music, letting it guide you and him in turn. 

The sun gradually set as you two danced, until moonlight replaced it shining through the window, making the flicker of the candles more dramatic. The room felt more romantic without the extra light, more intimate as you willed yourself to get closer to Minghao, wanting to feel him and engrave this moment into your memory. It nearly worked, and for a moment you were at peace, until he spoke up again. 

“So, do you want to tell me what this is really about?”

“What do you mean?” you asked, glancing up to meet his gaze, though your eyes quickly fell back to your feet. His expression was soft, and yet his eyes were burning through you like he knew something you didn’t. Judging by his attitude, you wouldn’t be surprised if that were the case. 

“I wasn’t born yesterday Y/N, I know you didn’t drag me here just because you wanted a dance,” he pointed out, “you’re up to something and I want to know what it is.”

“I’m not up to anything, I just want to be with you,” you confessed, “I just want to love you and have you love me in return.” 

“You know that I love you, I’ve loved you since the first night we spent together in my study.”

“Then why won’t you show it? I know you’re worried about your family and all of that but does their approval really matter that much. Clearly Jun is okay with us being together and I’m sure your parents would come around to it,” you were basically pleading with him at this point. You didn’t care what the consequences were any more, you just wanted to be near him, hold him, love him the way you knew he deserved. You knew he was holding back and hurting himself in the process and you hated seeing him like this, you just needed him to open up. 

“My love, believe me I would do whatever it takes to be with you,” he promised, leaning down to rest his head against yours. 

“Then do it,” you urged, “you and I both know there’s a way.” Minghao was confused for a moment, until it finally dawned on him what you were implying. 

“Love, you can’t seriously be asking me to-”

“Mate with me,” you cut him off with your answer, “I know the chances of it working are low but if it does then your family would have no choice but to accept us!”

“You do know what you’re asking for right?” Minghao questioned, “this is not a simple process and it could put you under a lot of stress. I don’t want to hurt you.” 

“Who said you would hurt me? I’ve done my research Hao, I know what I am getting myself into.” 

“There are so many ways that this could go wrong,” he argued. 

“I know but think about what it would mean if it goes right,” you rebutted, “you do want to be with me, don’t you?”

“Of course I do but I don’t want you to potentially ruin everything for yourself, if it works that means you will be bonded to me forever,” Minghao reminded. As much as he would love for it to work, he knew the risks better than you did and he didn’t want you making a choice that you would regret. 

“Hao please,” you pleaded, lifting your arms to cup his face, “what will it take to convince you?” You could see the gears turning in his mind as he melted into your touch, his own hands coming up to rest on top of yours. 

“Are you sure this is what you really want?” he asked, almost in a whisper. 

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.” 

“Very well,” Minghao agreed, “I’ll make you a deal. I will give you a taste tonight of how that feels and give you time to think about it. If you decide this is what you still want, then we can give it a shot, but know that I can’t promise you it will work.” It wasn’t the exact outcome you were hoping for, but you supposed it was better than having him turn you down completely. “So little dove,” he continued, grabbing one of your wrists and turning his head to press a kiss on your pulse point, “do we have a deal?” You nodded at first, only to sigh when he gave you a stern look stating that he needed a verbal answer. 

“If it means you’ll give me a chance then yes, we have a deal.”

“Very well,” Minghao pulled away from you slightly, still holding onto your wrist as he gave it a once over. “You haven’t been bitten by a vampire before, right?” he asked, unable to hide his smirk when you agreed, “the wrist is an easier spot for your first time. I’m only going to do it long enough so you can get a good feeling for it though. It may hurt at first, but after a few seconds it should start to feel almost warm but not in a bad way.” He looked up at you to make sure you understood, stroking your skin with his thumb as you took a second to calm your nerves. Though you weren’t sure if you were nervous because of the new experience or because Minghao was the one doing it. 

“I’m ready,” you assured, giving him a confident smile. 

“Good, if it hurts or you feel dizzy at all I want you to pull at my hair and I’ll stop,” with that he pulled your wrist towards his mouth. You got a few seconds to prepare as he pressed a light kiss against your pulse point, letting his fangs brush over it before carefully biting down. You gasped at the sensation, tensing up as it felt like you were being stabbed with needles. Minghaos grip on your wrist tightened as you squirmed, keeping you still and looking up at you to make sure you were okay. The pain lasted for a few more seconds before turning into a dull throbbing, and then finally you felt the warm sensation he was talking about. It started at your wrist before flooding through the rest of your body, making you tingle and relax against his touch. You never expected the sensation to be this pleasurable, almost feeling like you were too hot and yet it was a sensation you never wanted to end. Minghao couldn’t help but moan softly at the taste, an action you mimicked as his pleasure only seemed to heighten your experience. 

The second you felt your legs go weak was the moment he let you go, brushing his tongue over the newly formed bite mark and wiping his lips with his free hand. He was quick to catch you as you felt yourself lower to the ground, bringing him down with you as he looked at you in concern. 

“Are you alright?” 

“That was amazing,” you breathed out, “honestly I didn’t want you to stop, that felt way better than I thought it would.” Minghao giggled softly at your confession. 

“I didn’t want it to end either, but if I didn’t stop then I’m not sure I would have been able to, your taste is so addicting.” You looked over at him, noticing how his pupils were blown and his lips were parted, fangs still poking out as if he was desperate for more. You weren’t sure if it was because you were coming down from your mini high still, or if it was how attractive he looked, but you couldn’t stop yourself from jumping forward and crashing your lips onto his. The contact clearly caught him off guard and sent both of you crashing to the ground, Minghao on his back with you on top of him. He let out a surprised yelp and for a second you were worried you had hurt him, about to pull away and apologize when he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer to him to deepen the kiss. 

You could still taste the remains of your blood on his lips, but the rest of Minghao was so intoxicating that you couldn’t bring yourself to care. You bit on his bottom lip and swiped your tongue across his fangs and the inside of his mouth, careful not to cut yourself. He tried returning the passion in your kiss but you quickly overpowered him and he was left a moaning mess on the floor, desperately gripping onto you as you kissed him like your life depended on it. You adjusted yourself so you were straddling him, grinding your hips down against his when you felt the bulge forming in his trousers. The friction had Minghao whimpering against you, breaking the kiss and throwing his head back as you repeated the action. As you sat up to catch your breath you finally realized the position you found yourself in. The normally calm and composed Minghao was now a shuddering mess beneath you, his hair messy and makeup smeared, his shirt also coming untucked at the front which gave you a peek at his abdomen. All of this coming from a simple bite, and it made you want to ruin the man beneath you. Claim him as yours and see how far you could unravel him until he came undone. You were never one to claim a dominant role in your past relationships, but something about the man beneath you brought out a new found confidence. 

“I want you so badly,” you whispered, grabbing his hair and lightly pulling his head back so you could kiss and suck at his neck. 

“Then take me,” he pleaded, “Darling I am all yours.” His words were rewarded when you bit down on his neck softly before returning to kiss him again, giving his hair one last tug before letting go and moving your hands beneath you to begin undoing his shirt. You could feel his hands tugging at your own shirt, debating pulling it off before giving up and sliding his hands under the fabric instead. His touch was cold in contrast to your heated skin, sending shivers down your body and making you gasp into his mouth. His fingers expertly traced your skin, gently scratching down your lower back before reaching further up to pinch and tug at your nipples. The sensations had you arching your back, making you grind your hips further into his and making him groan. 

“You are so beautiful, you know that?” you asked, pulling away from the kiss to finish undoing his shirt. This was the first time you were ever seeing Minghaos body and he was even more attractive than you had imagined. You knew that he was on the slimmer side, but his body was still toned enough that you could see the outline of his muscles. His skin was soft and unblemished, feeling almost unreal under your touch as you trailed your hands up his body, taking your time to feel him and memorize every curve. Minghao sighed softly at the touch, leaning his head back against the ground and letting his eyes close so he could enjoy the feeling. 

“You’re one to talk,” he responded after a moment, giving your nipples another tug which made you squirm above him, “sensitive too I take it.” 

“Don’t get too ahead of yourself, I’m the one in charge here,” you reminded, sliding down his legs a bit so that you could undo his belt and trousers. Minghao lifted his hips enough to help you slide them down along with his boxers, opting not to take them off all the way since you were desperate to feel him. Minghaos length matched well with the rest of his body, on the longer side but more slender. It seemed you had already gotten him pretty worked up as he was already leaking precum and his tip was red. Minghao gasped and shuddered as you took the base in your hand, giving him a few experimental strokes to get a good feel of him. 

“Even this is pretty,” you teased, swiping your thumb across his slit causing him to tense up, “I would love to get a taste of you.” 

“As much as I would love that Darling we might want to hurry things up, we are still in the ballroom and I would rather not have anyone walk in on us,” Minghao reminded. You spared a cautionary glance towards the doors, taking a moment to listen for any footsteps. Based on what Jun and Hao had told you, the chances of anyone walking in were slim, but that didn’t mean they were zero. After a moment you decided it was safer not to risk taking too long and sighed. 

“Next time then,” you hummed, climbing off of Minghao for a second so you could remove your bottoms then climbing back on top of him. His hands found their way to your hips as you positioned yourself over him, spitting on your hand and using that to coat his length before slowly easing him inside of you. The stretch wasn’t too bad, but it was still enough for you to feel it, causing you to moan as you stilled with him inside of you. Minghao cursed at the feeling and threw his head back, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth in an attempt to be quiet. 

“Oh god you feel so good,” he moaned out, tightening his grip on your hips as you gave yourself a second to adjust. It took all of his willpower not to thrust up into you, but he refrained and allowed you to go at your own pace to make sure he was comfortable. It only took a moment for you to get used to him, grinding your hips down on him before starting to lift yourself up and bouncing on him. You went at a teasingly slow pace, almost frustratingly so, but it was worth it to see Minghao tense up in an attempt to not take control and pound into you the way you were sure he wanted to do. “Angel,” he huffed out, “as much as I love this time with you I am dying here, please go faster.”

“Aren’t you already dead?” you teased, but you obliged and sped up your pace anyway, causing the both of you to moan out. Your hands landed on his chest for support and his began roaming your body, making sure to feel every inch of your skin. Eventually he settled for gripping onto your thighs, squeezing at them as you continued to bounce on him. Unfortunately, it was hard for you to keep up the pace as you quickly began to grow tired, movements faltering a bit as you struggled trying to keep going. Minghao quickly noticed and chuckled softly to himself, taking advantage of your exhaustion to grab you and flip you both over so now he was the one on top. 

“Alright little dove, now it’s my turn,” he purred, grabbing your hands and pinning them beside your head as he began thrusting into you at an almost inhuman pace. The speed and force had you crying out in pleasure, tightening your grip on his hands and closing your eyes as you lost yourself to the feeling. Minghao pressed his lips to yours again to help keep you quiet, swallowing your moans as he continued the same pace. It wasn’t long before you felt that familiar knot forming in your stomach. 

“Hao, I’m close,” you moaned out, pulling away from the kiss. 

“Don’t worry Angel, I got you just let go,” he whispered, burying his head in your shoulder as his own moans got louder, signaling that he wasn’t far behind you. With a few more thrusts he was pulling out and releasing over your stomach, biting down on your shoulder to quiet himself. The sensation of his fangs buried into your skin again was enough to send you over the edge, vision going white as your release took over you. 

The last thing you remembered was Minghao calling your name and feeling his fingers graze your cheek before you passed out. 

ღ ღ ღ ღ ღ

To say you were confused when you woke up in an unfamiliar bed was an understatement. This bed was bigger and much softer, with you tucked in under a black, silk comforter as opposed to the velvet one in your room. You felt dizzy and the side of your neck was throbbing, brushing your fingers over the area, you winced when they touched an evident mark. The same place Minghao had bitten you right before you passed out. Speaking of Minghao, the male in question was nowhere to be seen, the only sign of him being the scent of him that lingered in what you had to guess was his room. Your suspicions were confirmed when you rolled over and saw a note resting on the pillow. You could recognize his handwriting anywhere as you read the note apologizing for going too far and having to leave you alone. It said he needed to attend to a few things but for you to rest and relax and he would be back soon. You couldn’t deny that you were a bit disappointed waking up without him, but at least he didn’t abandon you. 

You slowly sat up and pulled the comforter off of you, revealing that you were also wearing one of Haos dress shirts, the fabric doing very little to cover your figure but at least it was something after your own clothes had been ruined in the ballroom. Also it smelled like him which served as a great comfort to you. You couldn’t help but notice how he seemed to overwhelm your senses, and yet you wouldn’t dare pull yourself away from it, almost as if you were drawn to anything that reminded you of him. You shook that thought away though instead deciding to glance around the unfamiliar room. You had only ever seen his study and not his actual room, so you couldn’t help but be curious. Besides, you assumed Minghao was still busy and wouldn’t be back for a while so there would be no harm in looking around as long as you were careful, right?

You carefully slipped out of bed, taking a moment to stretch before making your way to the other side of the room. Most of the lights were off, but the lamp on his bedside was on which provided enough light for you to see clearly. Minghaos room had the same dated touch as the rest of the house, but it was also distinctly his. It had the same off white walls that you recognized from the rest of the rooms, but with more notes of gray and black in the furniture. The floor was hardwood, but there was a large gray rug in the middle that you swore was the softest thing you ever felt. The walls were decorated with various paintings, some of which you recognized as his own while others were likely collected from his trips. There were also various artifacts and statues on the shelves that seemed fragile so you were careful to stay away from those. The windows in the room were smaller, mostly covered though one was open to let a soft breeze into the room. The room was fairly simple, but it also had an elegance to it that had Minghaos name written all over it. The one thing that really caught your attention though, was the black easel that was tucked into the far back corner, facing away from you so you couldn't see what was on the canvas. Unlike his studio, the supplies in his room were neatly organized on little black shelves, all surrounding that one corner. You had seen his work a million times before, but something about this one in particular was calling out to you. 

Cautiously, you walked over to the corner, careful not to knock anything over as you carefully turned the canvas around. A familiar outline came into view and you realized why you had been so drawn to the painting, it was the same one that Minghao had shown you back before your fight. You had assumed he had gotten rid of it, but now it was standing right in front of you, and much more detailed than you had remembered. In fact, it looked like he was nearly finished with it. You could clearly make out the details on the two figures, and it dawned on you why your opinion on it mattered so much to Minghao. 

“That’s…us,” you muttered, ghosting your fingers lightly over the painting to trace the noticeable figures. He had painted the two of you dancing together, catching small details like your eyes, your hair, the way you smiled at him, everything. You also very quickly recognized the outfit as the dress he had designed and was planning to make you for your wedding. You couldn’t help but get emotional looking at it, wondering how long this had taken for him to do and how long he had been planning it. 

“Going through my stuff I see,” you whipped around to see a smug Minghao standing against the door, hands tucked in his pockets as he watched you. You didn’t even know he was back, let alone hear the door open. 

“Hey, when did you get back?” you questioned in an attempt to change the subject. It wasn’t like you were doing anything wrong but you still felt awkward getting caught. Not to mention the look he had was enough to make you feel small under his gaze. 

“Just now, I got called into a family meeting. I’m surprised you’re awake. I've only been gone an hour or so,” he said. 

“I see,” you replied, “how did that go?”

“That’s not important right now,” he brushed you off, “want to explain what you’re doing?”

“You didn’t get rid of the painting,” you stated as if that wasn’t obvious, the response causing Minghao to laugh.

“Of course I didn't, I just needed a more private space to work on it, you know you weren’t supposed to see it yet.”

“But I already have seen it.”

“Were you able to tell it was us back then?” he asked, shaking his head at your moment of realization, “honestly when I started working on it I had planned to confess to you with it but things got a bit complicated so I locked it away in here, and yet here we are.” 

“You’re the one that brought me to your room,” you reminded. 

“Well what was I supposed to do hm? Leave you passed out and half naked on the ballroom floor?” Minghao teased. You couldn’t help but blush at the memory of what happened only a few hours prior, something Minghao noticed even in the dim lighting. 

“You could have taken me to my room if you didn’t want me to get curious,” you teased back. 

“I could have but I like having you here, I think I may just keep you here from now on.” He was clearly amused by the situation and as much as you loved the idea of staying with him, there was also a defiant part of you that wanted to push his buttons and mess with him. 

“What if I don’t want to stay here?” you questioned, moving over to the door and attempting to push past him. You didn’t even make it a step further before his arm was around your waist, pulling you against his chest. 

“You weren’t saying that earlier,” he whispered, “and I’m afraid that’s no longer an option.”

“Well I change my mind,” you muse, clearly not serious as you pull away from him. Minghao lets you go, but you hear him groan as you do. 

“This is a dangerous game you are playing, you know that right?” he huffed, tone lowering as he spoke, “if you walk out that door there will be trouble.”

“For me or for you?” you taunt, already opening the door. You weren’t sure what you were expecting but there was a new thrill emerging from the idea of running from him. Would he chase after you? Given the way he was acting it was almost a guarantee and that thought had your mind racing. Also, in a weird way this felt like revenge for all the times he ran from you. 

“Darling I’m giving you five seconds, don’t make me chase after you.” Minghaos voice was stern, but you could hear the amusement laced behind it. He was challenging you, he wanted you to run away because he wanted the thrill of chasing after you. Who were you to deny him? Minghao started counting down and you wasted no time in running out the door and down the hall. You paused for a moment, looking around the hall and wondering where you could go where Minghao wouldn’t catch you. The garden would have been your default but you assumed that was too obvious, but you didn’t know a large majority of the house so you weren’t sure where else you could go. Not that you had much time though, as you looked over your shoulder to see Minghao already making his way towards you. He wasn’t running, but his stride was long and you knew he would easily catch up to you if you waited too long. “If I were you my little dove, I would start running,” he called out, causing you to turn and immediately rush down the stairs. 

You could briefly hear Minghao yell something after you, but his voice quickly vanished as you put enough distance between yourself and him. Knowing the young vampire though, he probably wasn’t too far behind you and had a few tricks up his sleeve to mess with you. Eventually you decided the library would be your best bet, yeah it was obvious but had enough space for you to hide and potentially run away from Minghao. With that in mind, you crept your way over to the familiar door and snuck inside, careful not to make too much noise. Moving a bit slower to make sure you didn’t run into anything, you tucked yourself into a corner behind one of the bookshelves. You kneeled down and positioned yourself so that you could peek around the shelf. Not that it mattered much as you couldn’t see anything due to the darkness. You couldn’t deny the thrill you got from waiting, wondering how long it would take for him to catch you already knowing he would. 

It only took a few moments before the door was opening, light pouring in and showing his shadow before the door was closing again. You covered your mouth and pressed your back into the wall as you heard his footsteps echo through the room. You could hear him hum and giggle softly as he made his way around the shelves, clearly undeterred by the darkness. 

“Quite a predictable hiding spot don’t you think?” he called out, voice echoing as he looped around one of the bookshelves, “I’m starting to think you don’t even want to win.” You couldn’t help but huff at that, the sound catching Minghaos attention as he made his way to the corner. You could barely make out his outline as he stalked towards you, giving you enough time to react and slide around to the other side of the shelf. Keeping your movements as silent as possible, you darted past him, heading to the area of the room he had just vacated, hoping to throw him off your trail. Minghao seemed to notice this as you heard him laugh. “Where are you hiding my little dove, I know you’re in here,” he called out, the playfulness in his voice evident.

You pressed yourself against the wall, suppressing a giggle, feeling the adrenaline rushing through your veins. You knew Minghao was a master at this game, but you were determined to outsmart him. Your heart was pounding in your ears as you tried to stay as quiet as possible. The sound of footsteps stopped, a moment of silence followed before his voice rang out again, “Well played Darling, but it's no use, I will find you soon enough. We are linked, you can’t hide.”

You giggled quietly, tiptoeing your way to the door in hopes that you could sneak out past him. It seemed that Minghao was two steps ahead of you though, as the second you went to open the door you found yourself pinned against it. You gasped as your wrists were pinned to the door beside your head, Minghao pressing himself against you so you couldn’t escape. 

“Found you,” Minghao purred, flipping you around so you were facing him. 

“You did indeed, now what?” you hummed, squirming against him. 

“Now,” Minghao breathed, leaning in so your lips were brushing, “I claim what's rightfully mine.” As he connected your lips he pulled you both away from the door, savoring your taste for a second before pulling away and throwing you over his shoulder with what you assumed was inhuman strength. You let out a noise that was a mix between a squeal and a laugh as you were carried back up the stairs and into his room, Minghao kicking the door closed before carefully dropping you onto his bed. “Since we’re alone I can finally take my time with you,” he mused, carefully undoing his shirt and sliding it off his body as he walked around to the other side of the bed. “Stay put,” he ordered when he saw you reach out for him, staying out of your reach as he went through his various drawers looking for something. Before you could ask him what he was doing he had returned with what he needed, crawling onto the bed and setting whatever it was off to the side before pinning you to the bed and kissing you again. His hands made quick work of the shirt you were wearing, practically ripping it off to expose your body to him. 

“Beautiful,” he praised, pulling away to admire you before reaching behind him, “do you trust me?”

“Of course,” you whispered back, making him smile and show you the object that was in his hand, a long silk tie that you assumed he got from his closet. 

“Good, now be good for me and put your hands over your head,” he ordered, to which you eagerly obeyed. It was a bit of a struggle with the shirt still in the way, but that only seemed to amuse Minghao as he helped you put your arms up, your hands still caught in the sleeves. If anything, this only worked in his favor as he wrapped the fabric around your wrists in a makeshift restraint, finishing his work off with the tie to make sure that you couldn’t easily escape your binds. “Comfortable?” he asked, to which you eagerly nodded, “perfect, now why don’t you do me a favor and close your eyes.” Once again you agreed, squirming with anticipation as you wondered what he had planned. 

The realization came a few seconds later as you felt something soft brush along your inner thigh, causing you to gasp. You heard Minghao hum in delight as the sensation brushed along your thigh once again before moving to your hip and up your body, purposefully missing the spots he knew you would be sensitive. Once the bristles tickled your stomach, you recognized the sensation as being one of his paintbrushes. The tip barely grazed your skin as he brushed random patterns all over your body, going down to your thigh before moving back up and lightly brushing around your nipple, causing you to whine and open your eyes. 

“Hao,” you whined out, “stop teasing me please.” He ignored you though as he moved the brush up your stomach, swirling it around your nipple. You hated how sensitive you were, reacting to the lightest touch by arching your back and silently pleading him for more. 

“I have no idea what you are talking about Darling,” Minghao murmured, “I’m just working on my latest masterpiece.” You whined again as he continued trailing the paintbrush across your body, paying close attention to your nipples but refusing to touch you. You were growing increasingly frustrated at the teasing, rubbing your thighs together and pulling at your hands. You almost succeeded in pulling them out of the shirt when his free hand reached up to grab your wrists. “Nice try Angel, you’re not getting away from me that easy,” he hummed. You exhaled sharply as he set the paintbrush to the side gripping your thigh as  he trailed his kisses down your chest, stopping to swirl his tongue over your nipple. You gasped softly and arched your back, giving Minghao better access to your chest. He continued with his actions, flicking your nipple with his tongue before wrapping his lips around it and sucking, making you moan softly. 

“So sensitive,” he muttered, grazing the skin lightly with one of his fangs before letting it go and switching to give the other side the same treatment. His one hand stayed pressed against your wrists, keeping them in place as you tried pulling away. 

“Minghao please,” you begged, “I need you so badly, please do something!”

“Well since you asked so nicely,” he replied, making quick work of his pants and boxers, kicking them to the side and positioning himself at your entrance. Mimicking your actions from before, he spit on his hand to lubricate himself before slowly pushing into you. You threw your head back against the covers and moaned at the familiar stretch, Minghao groaning softly as he bottomed out. He started out with slow thrusts, just feeling you and letting you get used to him before gradually speeding up until he was thrusting into you with the same inhuman speed as before. You already knew you weren’t going to last very long, already feeling your stomach tighten as you closed your eyes and pulled at your makeshift binds, desperate for something to hold on to.

Minghao noticed this and within seconds your hands were free, allowing you to wrap your arms around his neck and pull him against you. Your nails dug painfully into his shoulders but that only seemed to encourage him as his movement continued and his head fell to your shoulder. 

“You are so perfect,” he moaned out, making you shiver as his breath tickled your skin, “I love you so much, I don’t think I could ever be without you.” His words made your heart swell, but you were too gone to acknowledge them at the moment, more focused on your rapidly approaching release. 

“Hao,” you whined out, “please, I want you to bite me again.” Your words caused his movements to falter a bit, Minghao raising his head to look at you. 

“Darling, are you sure?” 

“Please, I’m so close please bite me again!” your wish was granted as he buried his fangs into the already formed bite mark while picking up his pace again. The combined pain and pleasure had you cumming with a silent scream, holding onto him like his life depended on it. Minghao slowed down his pace a bit to help you ride through your orgasm, licking at your neck until you settled down. You took a second to catch your breath before sitting up, having to pause for a moment as your head was spinning. Minghao tried to push you to lay back down but you stopped him, “You didn’t finish.” 

“Don’t worry about me Angel, I’m more worried about you,” he assured, but you shook your head and pushed him so he was leaning back on his arms. 

“Let me help you, I did say I wanted to taste you.” You leaned down and wrapped your fingers around his length, placing a few experimental kisses on the tip. Minghao tried to protest, telling you that it was fine but his words were cut off when you took him into your mouth. His body tensed and he inhaled sharply as you took as much of him in as possible, careful not to gag as you hollowed out your cheeks and began bobbing your head. You could taste yourself on him, but that quickly faded until all your senses could process was Minghao. The way he tasted, the way he smelled, the way his voice sounded as he moaned out praises and encouragement, the way his body tensed whenever you paused to swipe your tongue over his slit. It was intoxicating and you swore you could stay like this forever. Forever didn’t last very long though, as Minghao grabbed your hair to stop your movements, bucking his hips lightly as he released into your mouth. You couldn’t help but moan at the taste, swallowing as much as you could and licking the rest off of him. Minghao shivered at the overstimulation and quickly pulled you off of him, giving you a quick kiss as a thank you. 

“You really are something,” he commented, moving to get into bed and pulling you under the covers with him. You immediately snuggled into his chest, wrapping your arm around his waist as he moved to play with your hair. “You are okay though right?” he asked after a moment, “I’m worried I may have gone overboard.” You hum softly and snuggle further into him, wanting to be as close to him as possible. His presence was comforting, and you could feel your heart beating through him, almost as if it was his own. Minghao felt it as well, feeling like you were an extension of his being. Someone he never wanted to let go of, and at least for now he didn’t have to. He knew what this meant, but it wasn’t something he could bring himself to think about right now, wanting to savor the moment instead. 

“Hey Hao?” you ask after a moment, “what about that promise you made earlier?”

“Don’t worry about that right now, we’ll talk about it when you’re rested,” he replied. 

“Promise?” 

“I promise.” You yawned softly, allowing your eyes to close as you realized how tired you had become. You didn’t want to fall asleep, worried he would be gone by the time you woke up. However, your fight to stay awake was in vain and you quickly gave in, hugging Minghao tightly and pressing one last kiss to his cheek. 

“I love you Minghao,” you whispered, “I never want to be apart from you again.”

“I love you too darling,” he responded, “and don’t worry, you won’t.” You two would deal with the aftermath of your actions when you woke up. For now you just wanted to enjoy each other's presence for as long as possible. 

Seventeen Taglist: @woo8hao @amethyistheart @exfolitae @lexix001

To be removed please message me.

[multiversed-daydreamer]

Blank

Pairing: Joel/Tess

Warnings: MDNI, Dom/sub Dynamics, Sub!Joel, Dom!Tess, Tess has a strap, Joel gets pegged. Cunninglus, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex.

Summary: Tess helps Joel relieve some tension.

A/N: This came out of nowhere and wouldn't leave me alone so I wrote it. Hope y'all enjoy. Check out my Masterlist for more!

Joel can feel himself grow harder as Tess presses herself into his back. Hands slide over his chest, his stomach, the front of his jeans, teasing the bulge growing in his pants. He pushes into her, biting back a growl. 

“You’re needy today.” She muses. Her hands continue to tease him, sliding a hand under his flannel and roaming over his skin, thumb brushing over a nipple. This time Joel does shudder. Her hands meet at the waistband of his jeans, she unbuttons them, pulling his jeans down to his knees. 

Joel watches through their dresser mirror as Tess pulls his pants down. Fuck. His fingers curl against the wood, braced against it. He still cannot believe he let her do this. It’s rare, but it still happens. He watches as her hands go to his hips, pulling him back a little, readjusting him. “Fuck, Tess.” He mutters lowly. 

“Don’t start.” She hums, not bothered by his annoyance. “You’re hard, pent up, don’t tell me you don’t want this.” She’s right, he does need this. He watches as his boxers follow. His thick member bobbed between his legs. He watches her reach forward, dipping her fingers into the jar of oil next to him. Joel ignores it. He’s not against this, not really, but it was definitely never something he did before Tess. Her hands disappeared in the mirror, behind his body. He feels them gliding between his crack and settling on the puckered entrance, massaging fingers to coax him open. One slides in and Joel growls at the feeling, his cock twitching, fuck, he’s so hard. 

Tess chuckles as she gently moves her finger in and out of him. “Animal.” She reached up with her free hand and tugged lightly at his hair, feeling him tighten around her, a low groan slipping free of his chest. She slowly fingers him until he’s loose enough to add a second. Joel lets another noise slip, his hips pushing back, bending forward to give Tess more access. 

“There you go. Good.” She crooks her fingers, pulling a whimper from him. She continues to push in and out of him at a steady pace, spreading her fingers out to stretch him for a third. Joel is panting now, trying to keep his control and slowly losing it to Tess. When she adds a third finger, Joel’s knees nearly buckle. 

“Goddamn!” He breathes, his cock leaking with how aroused he is. He wants to touch his cock, He wants to fuck Tess. But it feels good to get fucked by Tess too. Once he’s sufficiently ready, she pulls out. He chases her for a moment, before stilling himself and waiting. Her hand comes back to gather more oil into her hand. Joel takes a deep breath, knowing she's spreading it on the strap-on she picked up from some fuckin’ sex shop god knows when. But he’s excited too, because she’s finally going to touch him. 

Joel forces himself to relax when she steps close to her, the blunt tip of the toy brushing against him. “You ready?” Tess questions, pressing lightly at his hole. Joel nods, and Tess pulls his hair again. “Words, Joel.” 

“Yes, ma’am.” He answers and gasps as she slowly pushes the toy inside of him. 

“Fuck.” He moans as she fills him up. It’s a new feeling every time. By the time she settles all the way inside of him, his mind is blank entirely. She pushes him further over the dresser, leaning down to press kisses into his clothed back. 

“Good?”

“Yeah.” He whispered, his hips twitch against her. “Please move.”

She does, slowly pulling out, before pressing back in. One of her hands curls over his waist, the other is still splayed on his back. She continues slowly, drawing in and out of him, watching his pent-up body slowly give in to his pleasure. 

She finds an easy, steady pace, the hand on his back moving around to curl around his cock. “Fuck, Tess!” He moans outright now, pushing back against her and bucking forwards into her hands, not giving a single flying fuck about his pride. Because he can’t think like this. Cordyceps doesn’t exist, Sarah doesn’t exist. The noises of the QZ fade, all he cares about is Tess. 

The hand on his cock matches the same pace her hips take on. She rolls her hips, trying to find that right angle that she knows will make him cum. “You’re leaking like a teenager, Joel.” He whines when she glances off of his prostate, tightening around the toy. Then she does it again and again and again. Joel is breathless as each thrust brings him closer to orgasm, his own hips jerking forward into Tess’ hand, chasing his peak selfishly. 

“Ah! Fuck. Tess. Lemme cum. Please, lemme cum.” Joel pants as he leans against the dresser, moaning with each thrust. Her hand is slick from the amount precum leaking out of him, slick and sticky and his entire body feels hot. 

“Let go for me, Joel. Come on.” She continues her pace, watching his frantic need take over. It turns her on to see him like this, desperate and nearly begging for her and her alone. 

Joel grunts as he ruts into her hand, chasing that pleasure until the knot in his stomach releases and he’s spilling into her hand. Tess praises him as she rolls her hips, coaxing him through the orgasm. “Good job. So good. That feel good?” She asked, stroking his hair as she slowed her thrusts. Joel nods, still twitching a little as Tess pulls out of him slowly, gently coaxing Joel into standing and guiding him the few steps to the bed, sitting down and letting Joel fall to his knees in front of her. “Gonna help me cum, Texas?” 

He nods, his large hands going to the strap, ripping it off of her before settling on her jeans and unbuttoning them, yanking on her pants and underwear until they’re off completely. Tess spreads her legs and curls her fingers through his hair, guiding him forward until his face is level with her wet cunt. He doesn’t hesitate, leaning forward and moaning as he drags his tongue through her folds. His hands shove her legs further apart, licking up her arousal greedily. His tongue flicks against her clit, lashing at it roughly. 

She pulls at his hair warningly, “Watch it.” She warns. Joel loosens his hands but his mouth is still frenzied, high on the submission. He shoves his tongue into her dripping entrance, fucking her with it as his nose rubs tantalizingly against her clit. Tess groans, her hands clutching onto his hair and her legs curling around his head, bucking up into his face. “Fuck, that’s it. Joel, Joel. Fuck, I’m gonna cu-” She’s cut off by her orgasm as she shakes through her climax. He’s relentless, not slowing down until she’s twitching and yanking him back. 

She lets out a breathless chuckle at the sight of him, the bottom half of his face is wet with her juices, and he’s drunk on pleasure, submission, and pussy. “Feel better?” She asks. 

He groans and nods. “Yeah.” She lets go of his hair and he stands, removing his own pants and underwear completely before crawling onto the bed. They lay there tangled together in each other's arms, coming down from their release. “Thanks. Know I’ve been a pain in the ass lately.”

Tess huffs. “Yeah, you have. Anytime.” He hums, tugging her closer as they fall asleep.