#y'all I am SWEATING

[arvandus]

Having a smol crisis over how tall some of the Obey Me cast is...

I recall reading somewhere that Luci is 6'3", just to give a point of comparison. Also read somewhere before that Luke is supposed to be 5'2"?? EXCUSE ME??

And then I see this gem:

and realize that FUCK IT'S TRUE. I'M THE SAME HEIGHT AS LUKE. Like, if Barb really is that tall (estimating 6'2") then my 5'2" ass will look like THIS standing next to him.

Which makes this NB dialogue so much funnier...

YEAH. NO SHIT. OF COURSE LUKE FEELS BETTER WITH ME IN THE KITCHEN CUZ I NEED A FUCKING STOOL TOO, APPARENTLY....

Just imagining having to do everything using a stool now. Also imagining how fucking big the Devildom furniture would be. If I, at a reasonable 5'2", need a stool to comfortably prep food at the kitchen counter, then how big are the chairs? The tables? The couches...??

Just me, sitting at at the dining table with my feet dangling...

Don't even get me started on Diavolo...

...look how much taller his behind Barbatos.

Fuckin' hell....

[melmedarda]

We need something revolutionary, Elora. Something to put Piltover on the map.

⸻ MEL MEDARDA, Arcane

[warpedpuppeteer]

We've got Buck doing the shoulder grab for once!!

[linkspussy]

Everyone with an excretion kink needs to hold hands I think. "I like XYZ but XYZ is gross." We're all gross, babe. Have your squicks, but don't ever act like you're above the person who jacks it to farts.

[khashanakalashtar]

RIP to 85 thousand of y'all but I have a built-in cooling system called sweat

[the-ghost-king]

Look.

He didn’t mean for it to happen.

It’s not like Will got up that morning trying to get a goddess's attention. Sometimes when you’re a demigod, things just sort of… happen. Who was to defy a goddess’s wishes? Especially one so beautiful as Persephone?

(Will was not going to call her “the most beautiful” he may not be smart enough to stop his heart from running up his throat every time he’s seen her, but he is smart enough to know he doesn’t want to be the demigod responsible for the next Trojan War, thank you very much.)

It was supposed to be a simple, “meet the parents” sort of dinner. Nico was routinely away to these sort of events in Hades’s palace, he didn’t understand why his “it’s probably going to be fine” was perhaps not the most comforting thing to Will. (“They’re gods it’s never safe, but they did promise food imported from the overworld, you know know, they have some installed child safety features, which means it will probably be fine.”) Will could be a rather anxious person at the best of times, meeting your boyfriend’s dad was terrifying to most young adults, and Will figured he should really get a free pass when your boyfriend’s dad was the overlord to your afterlife too. (“Persephone will be there, you like Persephone,” Nico was clever, Will enjoyed that Nico was clever, Will also enjoyed the many perks of bisexuality).

So considering he was nervous, and stressed, and being very brave about it; he’s just not so sure he’s the one at blame for getting lost on his way to the bathroom, he really feels like there’s a lot bigger forces at play here to blame for sure. It was almost bound to happen, who builds multiple intersecting hallways in a grid pattern and expects a guest to then find their own way around? Especially when so few of the rooms are truly restrooms, which isn’t really anyone’s fault either- gods and ghosts are just built differently. Natural variation, all well and good and an important aspect of a happy, thriving, biologically diverse population. Genetic diversity was great until it left you stranded in the middle of Hades’s palace looking for the proper place to freshen up.

So by scientific reasoning then, genetic diversity had gotten him here in the first place. So really all of this was biology's fault. It was usually biology's fault. Just look at the Krebs Cycle.

(One day he’d be able to hold biology accountable he was sure, but for now the sins of biological difference had him scrubbing his hands three times in the sink and he still felt like there was something on him. Thanks for this one, Dad.)

Unfortunately for Will at this moment, there were no skeleton butlers or spectrely maids to turn to for help with his struggle of finding his way back to the formal dining room when he was done either. So there he was, standing at a four way intersection of the halls in Hades’s palace trying to figure out which direction he had come from.

Apparently, Apollo’s ability to orientate his brain like a compass only worked when the sun was visible to Will. Unfortunately, in a disastrous combination of events, his ability to estimate time was also severely reliant upon the sun. So you know, not only was he lost in an unfamiliar place but he also was struggling to figure out where he had come from and how long he had been wandering. Maybe it was 5 minutes, maybe 30, maybe it had been 3 days - probably not the last one as Will didn't feel like laying in bed for 16 hours, nor did he feel particularly dehydrated. But he also wasn't quite sure. What no sunlight does to a motherfucker, huh. Damn.

Deep breath in, deep breath out. It’s all going to be fine. (In spirit of Nico, Will tacks a “probably” on the end).

(It helps, some.)

Just as the thought passes and Will starts looking around like he is in a game of clue for possible solutions out of his current predicament and back towards finding some undead to talk to to reorientate himself he hears the steady tap-tap of something walking towards him. Knowing that The Furies and The Fates both reside within Hades domain erases any initial comfort Will may have had at his initial "Well at least it's bipedal" thoughts. He hasn't yet had the opportunity to meet any of The Furies or Fates, and for all intents and purposes he had truly been advised not to.

"I was wondering where I might find you lost at," the voice is soft and light, but not in an airy or high pitched manner, but something warm and steady.

“M'lady," Will spins around to address her properly, she chuckles fondly at him.

"Had you found your way to a bathroom yet?" She has one eyebrow raised, a party trick Will's muscles are incapable of performing despite Cecil's insistence he just isn't trying hard enough.

“I was just trying to find my way back.”

"Ah, well then, follow me," she fists her hands into the soft petal-pink folds of her dress, and spins around to face the direction she'd just come from.

He hesitates for a moment, though he's not sure why.

(That is a lie, he hesitates because she smells like a gentle breeze wafting into the Apollo cabin, she smells like the gentle embrace of tall grasses in the field outside his Ma's house, she moves like a gentle stream freshly thawed flowing down the mountainside- and he is enamored by it instantly.)

"C'mon Apollopoulos don't worry," her smile is sharp, all teeth and stark in the moody lighting of the hall, "I don't usually bite."

It is absolutely the wink that does him in. His face feels all weird and warm and there's a feeling in his stomach, warm and tingling, "Of course, thank you, Lady Persephone."

He follows her.

[Part 2]

[imaginarycyberpunk2023]

OC: Vinnie Gallo

Happy Thirsty Thursday

[moraygrotto]

also while im chatting about this. i think a definite preference for me is that i dislike scenarios abt burping in public, tummy noises in public, etc. bc thats just too realistic for me & i don't like the nonconsenting strangers aspect, but i still love the idea of being able to conceal kink stuff in public like the post i just reblogged abt public vore digestion was 💯

[updownlately]

It deserves to be said mate. Your writing is good and the things you come up with are great as well. The way you turn songs into a fic is talent tbh. I tried but i failed 😂

But seriously take all the compliments you get because you deserve them 🥰🫶🏻

seriously means more than you'll ever know! genuinely thank you so much! glad i got people out here willing to read what i put out so shout out to y'all for motivating me!

but again, thank you 🥹🫶

[yvningshowers]

The IMMEDIATE brain rot hit me of Aizawa in the gym???

His fighting style leads me to believe that he probably does a loooot of calisthenics work- but his opponents tend to be HEAVY mfs, there's no way he doesn't weight lift. My brain is........ sausage......

[nyan-bynary]

Absolutely a huge fan of mixing more fluid (spit) into other fluid (blood) it is very visceral it itches the depths of my brain

[theglizzardwizard]

After all that shit I'm STILL going to upload a bunch of stuff that will inevitably get ripped off (but they'll have to file the numbers off lest they get accused of biting my shit)

[akai-anna]

*sweats nervously* ok, lately a lot of cool ppl followed me, nothing to worry about, at all, just keep cool and act natural

[gloomwitchwrites]

There was this tiktok trend where kids and their mums would pull a prank on their dads by telling their mums to shut up...141 with a teenage son who tries it?

Anon, I am very aware of this prank. If mom is in on it, I consider it all in good fun, but omg, these guys would be absolutely stressed if they heard their teenage son tell mom to "shut up." Heads would absolutely roll over that!

Price is certainly old enough to have a teenage son on the older side. I would even say the same for Ghost. Gaz is old enough for a younger teenage son. With Soap's age...that's stretching it. BUT SUSPEND DISBELIEF Y'ALL. I'm aging Gaz and Soap up a bit for this one.

For the masterlist and how to submit your own request, click HERE

Presented in two double drabbles and two triple drabbles.

Task Force 141 x Female Reader (w/ children)

Content & Warnings (per the warnings MDNI): swearing, pranks, domestic, dad!141, brief suggestive themes, marriage

ao3 // main masterlist // imagines & what if masterlist

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

“Ugh. Shut up, Mum.”

There is a brief pause between mum and when the television remote hurtles across the room. Your son doesn’t duck in time, the hard plastic hitting his shoulder before bouncing onto the kitchen island with a loud clack.

Before your son turns, Kyle’s baseball cap with the Union Jack, soars through the air like a frisbee. This one your son manages to avoid, but it’s quickly followed by a slipper. It flies past his head, and you catch it out of the air before it makes contact with the front of the microwave.

You and your eldest son turn in Kyle’s direction as he manifests in the kitchen entryway, the other slipper in hand, poised to launch it at the first sign of any movement.

“Wanna repeat yourself, mate?” Kyle appears calm and poised, but you notice the subtle tension in his jaw.

“It was a joke, Dad! Promise!”

Kyle’s arm holding the slipper starts to rise.

“Kyle,” you say. His gaze flicks to you. “Just a joke. No harm. I was in on it.”

His shoulders immediately sag. Kyle shakes his head. Rolls his eyes. Heading for the fridge, he opens it up, grabbing a can of his favorite beer.

Kyle sets the beer down on the island, pointing the slipper at you and then his son. His mouth opens. Closes. Opens again. No words come out, just an exasperated huff.

Kyle snatches up the television remote and sticks it into the pocket of his grey sweatpants. Keeping hold of the shoe in one hand, and his beer in the other, he gives the two of you his back, heading into the living room.

“No one bother me until the game is over,” he says over his shoulder. “And someone bring me my bloody slipper!”

John Price

"Fucking hell, Mum. Shut it."

John is up and out of his seat so fast you hardly see him move. He strides over to his son, yanking him off the stool by the scruff of his shirt.

"John! It's a prank!" you say quickly, reaching for his arm.

The boy is dangling in the air, toes just shy of touching the ground. "A prank?" asks John skeptically.

"Mum is in on it. Promise."

John sighs heavily and slowly lowers his son to the ground. The moment his feet touch ground, he tries to step away, but John holds firm, keeping his eldest child immobile. He leans forward a bit. Lowers his voice.

"Prank or no, you never talk to your mother, your sisters, or any woman in that manner again. Got it?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good boy." John releases his son. "The lawn needs trimmed."

"Yes, sir."

Your son scurries away. It isn't until the door to the garage opens and shuts that John moves toward you. His arm drapes over your waist, hand landing firmly on your ass, squeezing hard.

"You're coming with me."

"To do what?"

He presses his lips to your ear. "For a different sort of punishment."

John "Soap" MacTavish

"You’re off your head, lad.”

With Johnny’s cold tone comes a tension to your son’s shoulders. He becomes rigid, sliding down into his chair like he can escape from his father by cowering underneath the table. Johnny comes around the corner, a bit of sweat on his brow. He's been building furniture all day for the nursery.

"Want to repeat that for me?" asks Johnny.

Your son’s voice cracks. "It was just a prank, Dad."

"It was what?" Johnny strides forward.

"It's a prank. I'm in on it. Promise," you say, attempting to soothe Johnny’s anger.

Johnny crosses his arms over your chest. "Is it?" He glances between the two of you and sighs, muttering, “Am pure done in.”

He disappears down the hall, returning with a stack of instructional manuals, dropping them into his son’s lap. "You're building furniture."

"But I—"

“You right scunner. C’mon.” Johnny yanks his son out of the chair, the stack of instructional manuals goes flying. Your son reaches for them all, desperately clasping them against his chest.

“Johnny," you call out, walking around the counter to intervene.

He glances over his shoulder, frown gown, sly smirk on his face. “Deal with you later."

Simon "Ghost" Riley

“Oi, Mum. Shut it.”

Your son is a wonderful actor. You’ll give him that. Even you almost believe him. Not that he would—he’d never—but his delivery reminds you of a completely pissed football fan ready to throw a punch at a member of the rival team.

He should consider theater.

Simon, your husband, is watching a rugby match in the living room. The television is on but at a low volume.

Within seconds of the words leaving your son’s mouth, Simon appears like a phantom guardian in the entryway. In one he holds the remote like a weapon. The other arm cradles his infant daughter. She looks like a small bean. Slightly curved as she snuggles closer against Simon’s chest as she sleeps.

He's not looking at you. He's staring at his son, gaze intense and full of fire.

You’ve seen that look before.

Mission abort.

"He's joking, Simon. It's just a prank,” you soothe, knowing you need to get ahead of this.

Not that Simon would hurt you or his son, but he rarely takes any shit. This prank was a gamble, and you’re completely regretting it.

"Don't mean it, Dad."

Simon just stares for a long minute. His daughter squirms and that is when he glances down, severing the connection. Observing her must change something in him, because his gaze returns to the two of you, and there is a calmness now.

Sighing heavily, Simon shakes his head, completely exasperated. The eye roll is so apparent it’s like a shout.

In the moment he was pissed—livid. But now he’s over it, more annoyed and unamused than actually mad.

Turning on his heel, daughter still cradled in one arm, Simon returns to his recliner, settling back into the soft cushions to finish watching his rugby match.

taglist:

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[fluffylino]

pussy agenda with minho

-contains mature themes

this man has to have his hands on you regardless of where y'all are.

subtle touches turn into full on outrageous groping.

you walk into the kitchen, intrigued by the dish he's busily cooking up for the two of y'all. he glances at you, blinking slowly and then rapidly.

"c'mere" and the tone he uses makes you think he needs your help to cut a few vegetables or stir the boiling hotpot. so you prance to him.

letting out a silent gasp when he sits on his haunches. pressing his lips over your covered crotch. and he stands back up, a satiated smile on his face.

"thank you, baby" and he feeds you a small chunk of stir fried chicken before pretending like nothing happened.

when i tell you he doesn't care if you don't shave, i mean it.

he doesn't care one bit.

"every one has hair down there. its natural, lets all die naturally!" is what he says.

"minho!" you can't help but laugh, smacking him.

"nothing is ever going to stop me from eating this goddamn pussy..." nudging you with his shoulder. his hand creeping over the waistband of your shorts.

"...infact i want to spread you open and fuck my tongue into your tight little cun-"

"we're in public! p-public!"

slapping your hand over his mouth. shutting him up before he can finish his downright filthy comment. he raises an eyebrow, swirling his tongue across your palm while his hand sneaks past your waistband.

you're happy its all under the table but its both nerve wracking. the pads of his fingers rubbing over your already wet cunt and the dirty whispers in your ear.

likes to backhug you randomly. his hands squeezing your ass. you're used to it but for some reason you aren't quite used to the way he trails his fingers up your thigh.

cupping your mound and manhandling you to bend over any surface. its all playful and you giggle until he nudges your panties to the side. sliding a digit against your folds.

"always so eager to have me" chuckling in your ear. his front pressed up into your backside.

"pretty cunt. all mine to touch and play with, am i right, baby?"

it works. turning you on and getting you wet in mere seconds. then he walks off, nonchalantly. sticking his fingers in his mouth and leaving you hanging.

don't worry, he just loves to hear you whine about how much of a dick he is.

give him ten minutes max and he'll eat you out like a man starved.

slurping, licking and sucking with pure need. its the same enthusiam everytime.

eating you out is part of his weekly routine. has to do it more than 2 times in a week or he throws a tantrum.

loves loves LOVES when you're compliant and encourage him to touch you.

like when he's driving. placing his hand on your upper thigh. smirks at the way your thighs part automatically, and he takes the chance to play with your kitty.

"can i kiss you on the lips?" minho whispers, and your heart melts. you smile as you pucker your lips, leaning in to kiss him but you jerk up in shock.

his head already between your legs. pulling your underwear down with his teeth. and before you can even process whats happening, his tongue slips between your folds.

hot breath fanning over your pussy. his nose bumping into your clit while he breathes in a deep breath. eyes fluttering and moaning unbashedly at your scent.

you're not even wet, he just loves how you smell in general.

"god, i love you so much. i love your beautiful, soft, warm cunt"

LOVES LEGIT LOVES when you sit on his face.

ESPECIALLY after he gets back home from dance practice. sweating and out of breath yet so ready to be suffocated by your weight on top of him.

"thats it, kitten. fuck yourself on my tongue. don't stop till i say so."

.

.

.

in conclusion, he gets pussydrunk so easily but refuses to acknowledge it.

[crushpunky]

drew and actress!reader test how well they know each other

masterlist | actress!reader masterlist

this is based off the gq couples interviews. this one was a bit more difficult to write since there wasn't anything to go off of, but hopefully y'all enjoy it :)

Y/n sat in her chair, adjusting her hair to fall smoothly around her face with a calming, deep breath. Drew took his seat opposite her, smiling widely as a production assistant handed each of them a stack of cards. He wore an oversized knitted cardigan over a crisp white t-shirt paired with a pair of distressed jeans, his sharp features and messily styled hair tying the look together in a way that made y/n swoon.

“You ready?” Drew asked, raising his eyebrows slightly. With both of them preparing for the release of the newest season of Outer Banks as well as their respective upcoming projects, their agents suggested they do an interview together. Overjoyed at the offer, the two of them emphatically agreed to sit down with GQ for their Couples Quiz. It wasn’t the first time they had done interviews together, usually joined by the rest of the OBX cast, but this was the first time it had only been the two of them explicitly opening up and talking about their relationship.

“Of course,” Y/n returned his grin, crossing her legs as she glanced over towards the cameras. Since they went public with their relationship, they had never been especially secretive about it, talking about each other easily in passing as their partner or significant other. However, it was a bit nerve racking to be so open and talk so openly about the intricacies of their relationship.

“Alright, y/n you are clear to begin with the introduction…” one of the camera operators focused the lens on y/n, “now.”

“Hello, I am y/n y/ln and this is…” y/n gestured over to Drew, whose gaze still remained on her before he tore his eyes away and looked into the camera lens. 

“Drew Starkey.” Drew said quickly, causing y/n to laugh and a smirk to creep upon Drew’s lips.

“And today we will be taking GQ’s Couples Quiz.” Y/n finished before turning to Drew once more. With a dramatic flare, Drew shuffled his cards and cleared his throat.

“First up, how many siblings do I have?” Drew said with a quirk of his brow.

“Oh that one’s easy,” y/n said, wiping a faux bead of sweat off her forehead, “you are the oldest of four. You have two sisters and a brother.”

“That is true, that is true.” Drew grinned before tossing the card behind his chair.

“Alright, my turn,” y/n straightened in her chair, “what was my first job?”

“Why a barista of course,” Drew said, “and an excellent one at that. This girl makes a fucking killer iced latte—”

“Joseph!” Y/n reddened at his swearing, Drew immediately clamping a hand over his mouth as the two of them laughed.

“Sorry GQ,” Drew chuckled, “but it’s true. She makes a very good iced latte.”

“But yes, you are correct. My first job was in a coffee shop.” Y/n said, resting the cards back in her lap.

“Next,” Drew began, “what was our first date? Ooh that’s kind of a hard one.”

Y/n nodded to herself, thinking back towards the beginning of their relationship. It was by no means a traditional beginning, the two of them already living with each other between seasons of OBX when COVID hit. It had been only a few months into quarantine when they could no longer deny the feelings they had for each other, eventually leading them to finally start dating after what felt like lifetimes of pining over each other.

“Yeah, it is,” y/n chewed on her bottom lip in thought, “I mean we were already living with each other when we started dating, so I think we might’ve skipped that step.”

Drew chuckled, “yeah I think you’re right. But I think we’ve made up for our lost dates, you think?”

“Oh yeah, five years of living with this one I think we’ve made up for it.” Y/n smiled, thinking back to all the nights they’d spent together, whether sitting on the couch watching a movie, out at a fancy restaurant, or tangled in the sheets in their shared home. Continuing on, y/n looked at the next card.

“Drew if you don’t get this one we might have a problem,” y/n said, to which Drew’s eyes widened as he leaned in intently.

“What is my favorite Taylor Swift song?” Y/n peered over the card, a wide grin creeping on her cheeks as she watched Drew let out an exhale of relief.

“I definitely know this one: Getaway Car,” Drew said with a shrug. Y/n turned to the camera, flashing a smile and tossing the note card back. Drew did a fist pump before relaxing back into his seat.

“He knows me so well,” Y/n said. “What’s your favorite Taylor song, Drewseph?”

“Ooh, that’s a good question…” Drew rubbed his fingers along his jaw in contemplation. “I think I’m going to say Daylight because that was what we played at our wedding.”

Y/n rolled her eyes in faux annoyance at Drew’s overly sentimental but oh-so-very-Drew answer before letting out a giggle. Drew playfully rolled his eyes in return, a wide smile still plastered across his face.

“Alright, alright, who is my favorite character in Outer Banks?” Drew asked, tapping the queue cards against his chin as he waited for y/n to respond.

“I know they probably wanted this to be some cute answer and say me, but it’s really not.” Y/n said, causing the crew behind the cameras to giggle.

“Yeaaahhh it’s not.” Drew shook his head with a laugh only causing the crew’s giggles to intensify.

“It’s Barry, Nick Cirillo. The true love of his life.” Y/n said, using her finger to mime a tear falling down her cheek with an exaggerated frown.

“No, don’t say that.” Drew tossed the card at her with a shake of his head. “Yes, Barry is my favorite character, but the love of my life is most definitely sitting right here in front of you folks.”

“Aww, Starkey you sap.” Y/n said, blowing Drew a quick kiss before grabbing another question card.

“Alright, back to the questions,” y/n began. “When did we first meet?”

Drew’s face immediately lit up at the memory, “oh I remember it very clearly.”

“Do you now?” Y/n chuckled, cocking her head as she listened to Drew’s words.

“Yes, it was right after I had gotten a call back for Outer Banks,” Drew said. “They invited me in for a chemistry read and I just remember coming in and seeing this… just, absolutely beautiful girl sitting with the directors and my stomach dropped. Then she came over to me and introduced herself and I thought I was going to pass out. I was so nervous, but I tried my best to play it cool and… yeah. Here we are.”

“There is no way that is true!” Y/n teased, laughing at Drew’s exaggerated gestures as he told his story. She certainly remembered the day fondly, but she didn’t detect any of Drew’s nervousness… Maybe because she herself was so overcome with nerves the second she saw him walk through the door it didn’t even occur to her that someone who looked like that could possibly feel the same way about her.

“It is!” Drew said, raising his hands in surrender. “I thought I was totally going to bomb the audition but once the camera started rolling everything just clicked… and I’ve been totally obsessed ever since.”

Y/n felt her cheeks warm up, moving to cover her face with one of the question cards.

“Ok, here is the final question, baby,” Drew continued, a mischievous grin on his lips as he watched y/n’s flustered expression.

“Oh no!” Y/n said, smoothing her hair down and taking a deep breath to calm the flutters in her stomach. Despite being together for nearly five years, and even getting married, Drew still managed to always make her weak in the knees and remind her just why she loved him so much.

“Where is my favorite place on Earth?” Drew asked.

“Oh, I think I know this one,” y/n said with a smile. “Charleston, South Carolina.”

“Yep. Best place, best people… it’s truly our home.” Drew grinned, putting the card down and resting his chin in his hand as he stared at y/n lovingly. Catching his gaze, y/n stood up before walking over to him, the two of them embracing each other as the cameras continued to roll. Once they pulled apart, Drew rose to his feet, the two of them turning towards the camera.

“Thank you, GQ!” Y/n waved, Drew placing a kiss to the top of her head before waving along, the two of them smiling ear to ear and practically radiating with a love that continued to grow stronger every day.