#xieyaohuan

[blaacknoir]

Noirlander

PRE-RELATIONSHIP

How did they first meet?

Noir was his mentor, of course. That didn't develop into feelings until later, but that's how it started.

2. What was their first impression of each other?

Homelander was, I think, impressed by Noir, if for no other reason than Noir had the experience and credentials that he himself lacked. (Mirrorlander, of course, saw him as a threat, but that wore off when Noir offered to help him out.) Noir, on the other hand, saw this wide-eyed (and quite frankly terrified) naive kid getting worked over by Madelyn and decided NOPE ABSOLUTELY NOT and decided "Welp, this is my son now"

3. Did any of their friends or family want them to get together?

Canonically, of course, they don't get together. In my little AU though, nobody cares as long as Homelander is leaving them alone. (And of course everyone is too afraid of Noir to say anything :'( )

4. Who felt romantic feelings first?

Noir, although I'm not sure either of them are emotionally aware enough to realize they're in love. I don't think Homelander would realize that he had a boyfriend (in a similar way that I don't think he ever thought of Stillwell as a girlfriend) and I'm not sure Noir could articulate what exactly was happening with his feelings--the mixture of parental/platonic/brotherly/romantic love baffles him. If asked, he just shrugs and says he loves the Homelander, and then goes back to his doodles.

5. Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

Nah. Like I said, I don't think either of them actually realized there were feelings like that.

6. If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think?

Noir would just shrug; he doesn't believe in soul mates. Homelander would make That Face. You know the one.

7. What would their lives be like if they had never met?

I think both of them would both be far more ensnared in Vought. Homelander would have been completely at the mercy of Stillwell, and Noir would have simply become Stan Edgar's lapdog.

GENERAL

Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go?

Okay so I've got this whole little AU where Noir lives (you can see it on my AO3) and that's what I'm going with 😤 Neither of them did. Noir intended to leave, but didn't make it out of the building before turning back around and showing Homelader exactly what Soldier Boy had done to him. The night before the showdown, they had sex in an effort to comfort both themselves and each other. Although thinking about it, Homey moved in for the kiss first 🤔

2. Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like?

Not really. They're not actually aware they're in a relationship 😭

3. What was their first kiss like?

Noir was terrified because he had his mask off and I'm not sure Homelander was sure he was going to do it. (They obviously enjoyed it though.)

4. Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)?

They were both each other's first experience with a man. Noir, dealing with his own traumatic childhood and self-esteem issues, hadn't ever actually had a relationship before at all.

5. What’s their height difference? Age difference?

Noir is 6'3". Homelander is 5'11". Noir is in his early 70s, and Homelander is almost 40.

6. What’s their relationship with each other’s families?

Noir was more than happy to put Soldier Boy back in the box, and he absolutely adores Ryan. He also doesn't have any family for Homelander to get to know.

7. Who takes the lead in social situations?

Homelander, obviously. It's easier to take the lead if you're the only one who can talk.

8. Who gets jealous easier?

Again, Homelander. But Noir doesn't have any (real) relationships besides Noir, so there's not really anything for him to get jealous over. 😭

9. Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear?

Noir literally cannot speak so once again, Homelander 😭

LOVE

Who said “I love you” first?

Noir, although they both flash each other the sign fairly regularly.

2. What are their primary love languages?

Noir shows his love by... what do you call it. Acts of service. He actually knows how to cook (although he's got his own way of doing things) and likes to make people meals. Homelander does have to check on him though, because the only thing worse than dissociation in the kitchen is dissociation in the kitchen while the stove is on. Homelander is... he listens to Noir, asks questions, engages with him, and makes Noir a part of his life. His love language is treating someone as an equal, even though (to him) they wouldn't be otherwise.

3. Who uses cheesy pick-up lines?

Neither of them.

4. How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA?

In public? They don't. In private though, they're very touchy.

5. Who initiates kisses?

Generally Noir. There have been a few times that Homeland has tried initiating smooches when Noir was zoned out and it... did not end well. 😭

6. Who’s the big and little spoon?

They switch. Noir likes being the big spoon though. He sees Homelander as his responsibility, and when Homey's little body is curled up against his, he feels like he's actually able to protect him.

7. What are their favorite things to do together?

They enjoy playing with Ryan. It makes them feel as close to a normal family as they're ever gonna get.

8. Who’s better at comforting the other?

Noir is better at it simply because Homelander has the emotional skills of a potato. He tries though, and for Noir, that's enough.

9. Who’s more protective?

Oh, both of them. The most frustrating thing is that there's only so much each of them can do for the other.

10. Do they prefer verbal or physical affection?

Physical, absolutely. Noir loves the way that touch makes him feel less monstrous and scary, and Homelander is just a very tactile guy.

11. What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise?

I don't really do this whoops 😭

12. What kind of nicknames do they call each other?

Again, they don't really do that, whoops

13. Who remembers the little things?

Homelander remembers things like dates, anniversaries, etc. Noir generally just has a vague idea of what day it is. But he remembers things like if you offhandedly said you liked a movie or a certain type of music. They both remember little things, just... different little things.

DOMESTIC LIFE

If they get married, who proposes?

Time to break out the Momlander and Dad Noir AU (ft. nonbinary Homelander) Noir proposed. Homelander got pregante and Noir proposed a publicity wedding. It was meant to help keep Homelander's ratings up, as well as protect her reputation from the fact that she was having a baby out of wedlock.. It very much started off as a "fake relationship" thing.

2. What’s the wedding like? Who attends?

It's a very thrown-together affair, just something so there are photos for the news. They literally just wear their costumes and a bridal veil and tie. There were other members of the Seven, a few other big-name supes, and some Vought employees and and actors who filled out the world's strictest NDAs.

3. How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like?

Just Ryan, and he's... Ryan. He's a sweet kid who's a little shy. They've done their best to keep him out of the paparazzi, to the point where they actually do keep a house in the suburbs they retreat to. Neither parent enjoys going out in civvies, but Ryan is their precious perfect angel bab and they would do anything for him. 😔❤

4. Do they have any pets?

Ryan has an incredibly fancy aquarium when he's staying at the Tower. A gift from Uncle Kevin. He takes care of them when Ryan is off being a normal child. (The Homelander is not happy about this, but see question 3.)

5. Who’s the stricter parent?

Probably Homelander, simply because she... doesn't exactly know better. But she tries, and Noir manages to be a counterbalance to that so it generally works out okay.

6. Who worries the most?

They both worry 😭 Noir is worried that he's going to accidentally hurt Ryan--he barely held him at all at first--and Homelander is afraid that she'll screw him up. But again, their worries and strengths help balance the other one out, and things work out fine because it's my story and I said so :@

7. Who kills the bugs in the house?

Homelander would kill them, Noir would ignore them, but Ryan was very intent on the fact that they should take them outside, so lately, that's what they've been doing.

8. How do they celebrate holidays?

In addition to having their little suburban home, they've also got a cabin out in a more rural area, which is where they go to celebrate holidays, especially the ones involving fireworks.

9. Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning?

Oh they both do this. Noir was very sure to teach Ryan about Saturday Morning Cartoons so that they could get just a bit more sleep. :'(

10. Who’s the better cook?

Noir, but Homelander is learning.

11. Who likes to dance?

Noir, obviously. Look at those moves 😭

(questions)

[tearueful]

if you get this, answer with three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs! anon or not, doesn’t matter, let’s get to know the person behind the blog <3

Fuck, uh.

3 more facts.

I use to hang out at a BDSM and play Cards Against humanity.

2. I use to work for the Library of Congress, the DC site and the SUPER(Not) secret site in the side of a mountain with their super creepy cold vaults with all this nitrate film.

3. According to my grandmother, I purred when I was a baby cause the 3-legged cat my family owned would climb into the crib and cuddle me.

[deliciouskeys]

Yay! Lots of numbers below, feel free to pick and choose :)

16, 26, 39 (I think you *know* which particular scene I want a snippet of, but anything will do haha), 69, 76 for ZM

Thanks for the asks. I warn you, the following is verbose and references morally reprehensible fics. TW, lol.

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

I have many if just vague ideas count! And I'm sure you'll be pleased that they all revolve around Homelander, one way or another lol. I hate "claiming" prompts on the Meow meow prompt jar because it feels like hogging it unless I'm going to be actively writing, but I did just sign up for your "fertility treatment" prompt. My brain is often eaten up by the idea of HL being happily pregnant, and really self-satisfied to the point of being annoying. Meanwhile Butcher's probably kind of worried-- not like HL's going to be able to get a C section, at least not through conventional means. HL's blithely all 'we'll cross that bridge when we get there.' He's just enthused about getting to use a breast pump in the near future, and probably the fact that the baby he has is going to adore him unconditionally.

Yes, I am gross.

26. Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

Hrm. Unfortunately the wildest ride is still probably the first fic I ever posted publicly. Originally on LJ. 51k words. 12 chapters. Of... me being a teenage edgelord and writing about Captain Hook privateprisoning a prepubertal boy, that's not ever going to grow up, as if the chanslash wasn't bad enough.

Anyway, I skimmed through this fic about a year ago just to recall what was in it again, and I had forgotten just how fucked that story is, beyond even the pairing premise itself. There's gangrape of a child, ye olde macabre medical horror, and severe emotional trauma and manipulation/gaslighting that leads to really inappropriate bonding. But it did have impressive levels of worldbuilding, and pretty intricate dynamics between the, um, leads, but also side characters. It was a very rich environment. I was "1 or 2 chapters away from finishing it" and then never did, because, damn that thing was hard to wrap up in a not-completely-disturbing ending. I still occasionally get requests to finish it and people are subscribed, but I would not be able to get back into whatever mindset I had at that age. "Wildest" ! = "good" lol, but I'd never delete it.

Don't judge me for what i was doing ~20 years ago D:

39. Share a snippet from a WIP

Heh, full disclosure I criiiinge posting snippets of my fics because they're so awkward out of context, it's like walking in in the middle of sex. But here you go, from a section you asked for. I wish I just had this done and posted to AO3 -__-

Homelander probably senses the hesitation and decides to get himself up to a kneeling position, tilting his face up, licking his lips invitingly, probably hoping to defuse and redirect the weird energy in the room into something sexual rather than violent.

"Oh no you don't." Instead of undoing his fly, Butcher hoists Homelander up to his feet and pulls him out of the cage and towards the breakfast nook. "Lie down across my lap," he commands once he's situated himself in a chair.

"Why did you--" Homelander's words catch in his throat as Butcher yanks him down to lie across his lap, not waiting for obedience. "…take Temp V?" He sounds worried, and tries to lift his head, only to get his shoulders shoved back down.

The first thwack across Homelander's ass sounds really loud, echoing off the walls of the living room. Butcher gave it his all, somewhat forgetting that his strength was amped up. His palm smarts and he can only guess what it feels like on the receiving end. Homelander doesn't make a sound, maybe too shocked. Butcher swats him again.

"Really? This is just childi—" Another thwack resounds across the room and Homelander breathes hard through his nose. "That hurts, you know," he hisses.

"Yeah, that's the general idea. I know no one probably ever punished you while you were growing up, so it must be a new concept…" Butcher trails off, suddenly recalling the photocopied lab notes from Vought and realizing what he's saying is uncharitable.

Homelander doesn't argue, just lets out a strained whimper when Butcher's next whack lands square on the place he hit the first time. Angry red splotches are forming on his skin, helpfully marking out where he's already been hit and where he hasn't.

69. What work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

I'm not embarrassed per se, but I probably should be (if by nothing else than the sheer length of these three). Original dates, reposted to AO3 later.

2003- 51k chanslash mentioned in the previous question

2006 - 21k of working through some angst issues. Original work set in WWII Germany, also starts out underage although at least postpubertal,  problematic and historically inaccurate

2008- 59k of Pineapple Express mpreg, although I do recommend that movie to anyone who likes implied gayness in media and bizarre, funny dialogue which was a fun challenge to try to emulate in fic

76. Did you have any ideas that didn’t make the final cut of [ZM]?

I have generally managed to get everything into ZM that I wanted! One longish sequence I remember discarding (no mourning) was HL goading Billy to take Temp V with some form of misbehavior, and that being the thing that finally tips them into an overtly sexual, rather than a covertly-in-denial-kinky, relationship. It was violence that ended up as sex. But it was pretty rapey, and I didn't like it for this pairing. I prefer the version posted, where they're almost accidentally upping the ante, and kind of mutually sexually harassing each other, and it's about as consensual as it can be, at least within a private prison setting.

Plus Temp V does make an appearance towards the end of the fic, as you can tell from the WIP snippet lol.

[preakr]

6, 11, 16, 20, 28

6. Favorite title you used? probably "threaten me for a good time"

11. What work took you the longest to write? not sure honestly, probably just the longest one in terms of wordcount which is "kiss me animal"

16. What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag? in general: sibling incest this year: cunnilingus

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most? i dont typically reread them much, but i think it'd be "refracted"

28. Favorite work you wrote this year? same as the question above, "refracted"

[fanficsandfluff]

Yay I'm so happy! Thank you!!! Okay, here we go: The Boys, ticklish!Homelander/any character (my personal preference would be Madelyn or Maeve, or maybe Butcher, but literally any canon character works for me!) My preferred prompts would be: 4. Reward, 9. Trapped, 16. New Discovery, or 19. Revenge

It is DONE! I really hope you like it and it lives up to your expectations! It was definitely out of my comfort zone haha! But thanks for challenging me!

[august-anon]

Hi there! I'm writing a ticklefic based on two of your Tickletober 2022 prompts, and I have a question. I see that you write only SFW stuff. Part of my fic *probably* doesn't count as SFW, and of course I don't want to spam your tag with stuff you might feel uncomfortable with. But I also want to give credit to your challenge. So I'm dropping by to ask what your preference is, and I'll stick with that. Thanks for giving us a wonderful prompt list! Sorry if you've already answered similar questions and I missed it.

you write what you wanna write, like i said on the post, the list is open to everyone for whatever interpretations! I'm not uncomfortable, and it is totally up to you if you wanna use the augtickletober2022 tag or not! I absolutely assumed some people would be writing more suggestive or full-out nsfw content when i made the list, it 100% does not bother me at all

(also, i dont only write sfw, i just tend to keep all the nsfw stuff i write or reblog on my negelected @augustanon-butspicy blog that everyone, including me, forgets it exists lol)

[jethrowest]

✨🌈SEND THIS TO OTHER BLOGGERS YOU THINK ARE WONDERFUL. KEEP THE GAME GOING🌈✨

thank you so much!! between you, @deliciouskeys and @bisexualhomelander i am well-fed by in-depth and intriguing meta. love seeing you on my dash!! 🥹🥰

[devilander]

✨🌈SEND THIS TO OTHER BLOGGERS YOU THINK ARE WONDERFUL. KEEP THE GAME GOING🌈✨

thank you, you're too kind and wonderful 💕

[sehtoast]

✨🌈SEND THIS TO OTHER BLOGGERS YOU THINK ARE WONDERFUL. KEEP THE GAME GOING🌈✨

YOURE WONDERFUL

THE WONDERFULLEST

[irenadel]

4, 23, 57 for fanfic writer ask game

4. what is the plot bunny you’ve been carrying for the longest? optional bonus question: do you ever wonder why you haven’t written it yet and experience deep existential dread?

Oh god! Coming back to fandom writing has been a gradual multi-fandom process and it all started with my Star Wars-shaped nervous breakdown back in 2021. It was a dinluke vortex that started me back on my bullshit and I've been nursing a bunch of dinluke ideas that I am too much of a coward to write.

The one that has the most actual fic shape is a Luke meets Din back in his Tatooine days AU, where Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru work in the Tatooine Underground Railroad and have to hire Mando to look after Luke and the farm because they have to help some escaped slaves get to the rendezvous point for pickup. Din and Luke have a series of adventures, fall in love and get engaged. It had an Old West vibe to it, in that I wanted all the adventures to be Western flavored and the whole proposal thing was going to require some intense "saving up to set up a home" from both of them.

I kinda really like adventure stories that are given a strong backbone of domesticity. Every day the fic-that-could-have-been fills me with wistful dread...

23. how do you deal with writers block?

BADLY. When I'm out of energy I'm out of energy and that's the end of it. I've been dealing with a lot of burnout due to finishing my dissertation at the same time I was working and dealing with the pandemic and my roommates having financial issues.

I'd given up on writing for quite a bit, but getting back to fandom writing has been galvanizing! I'm just so happy to be here and writing again.

What worked during my dissertation and has been working lately is lowering my expectations. Like if all I can write is a page, then a page is fine. If all I can write is a paragraph, one paragraph is better than none. If all I can do is outline an idea, then the outline is better than nothing.

Little by little, you get a whole fic written... or a dissertation...

[blaacknoir]

@xieyaohuan

That's adorable but also makes a decent amount of sense! Regional accents affecting both how a person says a word and how they read it!

Also that's hilarious about your "alter ego" 😭 Are those by someone who has the "misspelled" version of your name, or do you actually have some stuff published? 🤔

[cozycornerevents]

Cozy Corner Domaystic

Inspired by Domaystic, this Cozy Corner event celebrates fic/art/edits/etc. that shows the caped blorbo in everyday life situations. That includes some classic domestic trope and potentially fluffy prompts, but because we all love to see Homelander in situations, I've also added plenty of everyday hassles.

The event includes 31 prompts, one for each day of May (though you don't have to stick to the order), plus a few alternatives for those who want to fill 31 prompts but find no inspiration in some of the main prompts.

A big thank you to @bisexualhomelander for brainstorming prompts with me -- and especially for coming up with the glorious "mundane use of powers" prompt!

As always, rules are minimal. Fill however many prompts you want, in whichever order you want, with whatever medium you like: fic, art, headcanons, gif sets, video edits, etc. Fills can be for a ship or for gen, and most of the prompts are sufficiently ambiguous to allow for either. You can also combine prompts and fill a prompt twice if you feel particularly inspired.

As a general tag for the prompt fills and so I can find and reblog them, I would suggest #cozy corner domaystic. All fills will be reblogged to the freshly renamed @cozycornerevents blog (unless you say that you don't want reblogs, of course). You can start filling prompts before May 1, but I won't be checking the tag as regularly until the beginning of May.

If you have any questions, drop me a line here on this blog or over @xieyaohuan!

Prompt list

Morning routine

Making tea/coffee for a loved one

Grocery shopping

Fighting for the remote control

Zoom call

Laundry

Thunderstorm

Skin care

Crossword puzzle

Mundane use of powers

Unexpected gifts

Sourdough starter

Sharing a toothbrush

Somebody is wrong on the internet

Taking a flight

Going through immigration

Parallel parking

Snow day

Filing taxes

Glorious Five Year Plan

Road trip

Noise complaint

Coupons

OCD

Correct use of capes

Identity theft

Biphasic sleep

Fireworks

Peace offering

Doing the dishes

Calling in sick

Alternative prompts:

"Are you coming to bed?"

"You forgot to turn the light off."

“Oh, what's this?"

"I'm not wearing that."

"It's your turn to do dishes tonight."

"Ryan's teacher called."

"Where are my keys?"

"You're bleeding."

"You forgot the milk."

"We'll be late."

[deliciouskeys]

@cozycornerkinktober prompt #5: Blindfold

Love Me Blind (Butchlander)

Warnings: Just the usual E rating. Short. Why did it take me this long to post a butchlander Kinktober fill lol. I feel like I have to fill this prompt. This is set in ZMverse, post-fic timeline. No AO3 link because I may or may not slide this into the next ZnMoO4 installment.

TL;DR of ZM: HL spent a few months in captivity/bondage, including a zinc plate over his eyes, he and Billy Butcher got physically and eventually emotionally intimate to the point that when HL got free, rather than killing his captor, he remained attached to Butcher, eventually convincing him to take Compound V.

“Come on, close your eyes,” Billy whispers in his ear.

Homelander tries, but he simply can’t. He’s barely managed to force himself to close his eyes to go to sleep, but he can’t bring himself to close them here, not with Billy in front of him. Not just in front of him, around him, inside him, everywhere at once, his hips snapping forward, his rough broad hands firmly gripping his legs near the insides of his knees and pressing them down into his chest, his beard scratching against Homelander’s collarbones and neck as those places are getting marked up with hickeys. Homelander loves it. Billy on V is truly a gift— well worth the days of taking care of him during the illness the slow dosing causes. He’s strong and durable, maybe too strong. Homelander’s not sure he could throw him off the bed right now, if he wanted to. But he doesn’t want to. He wants them both to be right here, to be pressed down, to feel achingly full, to have his skin sucked on with bruising strength. He wants to feel uninhibited, no longer having to take care and keep his own motions contained, no longer afraid to accidentally snag Billy’s body. But he doesn’t want one thing.

Billy’s orgasm somehow rocks through his body too, muscle tremors, rapid heartbeat and all, so that Homelander almost questions if they had somehow become physiologically connected. But no, his stomach is dry, cock still begging for release.

Billy unclamps his grip from his legs but doesn’t slump down on top of him, doesn’t pull out.

“Come on. Close ‘em for me,” Billy repeats, his voice husky, still breathing heavily, and runs a finger along Homelander’s jawline, tapping him under his chin.

“Why.” It would be so cruel of Billy to take advantage of him now, after having his life spared and even being gifted the V. But Homelander can’t help being wary.

“Want to see you trust me.”

Homelander sighs and closes them. Even though he can see through any material, when he closes his eyes— really, honestly closes them— they seem to automatically shut off, roll up, refuse to relay visual cues. He can’t peek through his lids. He’s plunged into the darkness again, sickeningly familiar, and suddenly he can’t bear it for a single second longer, and opens his eyes frantically. He hates to admit it, but he’s terrified.

Billy’s watching him, eyes full of something sorrowful, maybe tinged with curiosity and pity.

“I’ve gotcha,” he says, lowering his body down until his weight rests on Homelander’s body, caressing his face before kissing him. Homelander feels himself relaxing and letting Billy sink lower between his spread thighs, his erection getting pressed between their abs. It’s not exactly comfortable, but it’s comforting. Homelander feels his heart rate and breathing returning to normal when he’s feeling compressed. Feeling that Billy might be able to hold him down against his will is a weird thrill, a turn-on, but also a paradoxically calming feeling.

“Close them. For just a bit,” Billy coaxes him, even as one his hands approaches his eyes and gently covers them.

Homelander arches almost reflexively, despite the weight on him, and lets out a panicked breath that might count as whimper because there was some voice put behind it, but he doesn’t toss his head or do anything to throw the hand off his face.

The darkness is here again. But so is Billy. Close to him. Touching him in so many places. Weighing him down into the mattress. They lie in silence for what must be seconds, but to Homelander it feels like hours.

“You have to promise,” Homelander says, his voice hoarse and small. He’s afraid to finish his demand aloud.

“What’s that?” Billy nudges his nose under his chin and kisses it. He’s stayed inside Homelander’s body the whole time, and Homelander can feel him becoming ready for round two, growing, swelling, feeling less comfortable but in a way Homelander wants.

“You have to promise you won’t … you know. Keep me against my will.”

Billy stays silent and Homelander’s breathing speeds up when he doesn’t hear an affirmation. Somewhere in the back of his mind he’s imagining that Billy has stashed piles and piles of ZM coated wire under the bed, ready to secure him there, just waiting for the right opportunity. He so badly wants to push the hand off his face and see for himself.

“Okay,” Billy breaks the silence. “I promise you.”

Maybe it’s because he took so long to consider it, but Homelander actually finds those few words believable, relaxing his spinal muscles and sinking into the bed. “You want to fuck me with my eyes closed?”

“No,” Billy says. “But I want you to trust me.”

Homelander smiles wanly. “Who else am I going to trust?”

“That’s sad, mate.”

Homelander shrugs.

Billy removes his hand and Homelander blinks in the light before wrapping his arms around his partner’s shoulders, wrapping his legs around his waist, squeezing him closer, further inside, pressing up together so they almost feel like one body again.

Yes I cheated, there was no blindfold. I wrote blindfold for like 40k words as backdrop that’s relevant. It’s not a kink, it’s a way of life 😎

[preakr]

💖 and 👩‍🏭 please

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

HMM that's tough. i guess i'd have to say i think i do a good job at replicating characters' voices or thought processes, like my characterization i guess. though i usually only ever use it for porn, lol.

👩‍🏭 If one of your fics was going to get you arrested, which one and why?

...like...probably more than half of them...the first thing that comes to mind is "each breath you take is mine" which is an underage incest fic (powder/vi from arcane)

[merry-andrews]

rules: make a poll with five of your all time favourite characters and then tag five people to do the same 🍪 tagged by dear @kosmochlor ! thank you!!🌸💖🌸💖 I changed the question a lil! I hope you don't mind!!🥰💗

Tagging: @h-a-unted @aerospectrum @theryanbutcher @angelfacedarling (if you like to play guys🥰💗) and my dear @deliciouskeys and @mykaijusizefeels , @thevanityofthefox @the-homeboy @awkwardcourage @musicaltrashfromusa @bisexualhomelander @xieyaohuan and dear @vergeltvng and our sweet @vanshoundd !!

If you're seeing this, then you're tagged!!🥰💗

[blindmagdalena]

Pocket Rocket ( Homelander x Madelyn )

18+ 1.9k micro/macro, external only, mild objectification, grinding, under clothing play, uh... sexy shenanigans with super powers. written for @cozycornerkinktober!

After Vought develops a shrinking serum, they decide to test it on their resident lab rat. Homelander takes surprisingly well to being 4 inches tall, especially when it comes to spending time with his favorite manager.

set pre s1. i... have nothing to say for myself lmao this is my first time writing anything like this, so be kind to me. thank you @xieyaohuan and @deliciouskeys for your enthusiastic encouragement. 🖤

It started off innocently enough.

By utilizing the biological response that the hero Termite’s DNA has to Compound V, Vought scientists are able to distill a potent serum that temporarily shrinks any hero to Termite’s infamous size. The results vary from hero to hero, but generally speaking, those with higher concentrations of Compound V in their system fare the best.

Naturally, Homelander is the perfect candidate for the continued trials. The strategic potential this offers them, in combination with his other powers, is undeniable. He could be anywhere at any time, practically invisible.

The one perk Madelyn didn’t anticipate was how intensely docile it would make the supe.

Even now as she works, he lays sprawled out in her upturned palm, fitted in a tiny replica of his suit. He had insisted the details be perfect, all the way down to his boots. She has to admit, it’s rather charming. 

The serum doesn’t reduce him to quite the size Termite is able to accomplish. He’s about four inches tall, spanning the base of her middle finger to the bottom of her palm. Due to the sheer volume of V in his system, depending on how high of a dosage he takes, the solution can last as long as eight hours without any side effects. He’s been keen to make very good use of the time he has with it, eager to test it whenever the matter arises.

As for Madelyn, she doesn’t mind one bit. Not only does it allow her to keep an eye on him, it keeps him quiet and perfectly manageable. He rolls over in her palm, cushioning his head on his arm, and she can see in her peripheral vision that he’s smiling up at her. When she glances down, he closes his eyes like he’s sleeping.

Cute.

Her phone rings, and instead of rolling him onto the desk or awkwardly reaching across herself to answer it, she tugs open the breast pocket of her button-up and gently plops him inside it. She can feel him squirm a bit, but she knows he can fly out at any time if he wants to. However, it quickly becomes apparent that he isn’t squirming at all. He’s just making himself comfortable.

Taking her call, Madelyn does her best to ignore the sudden dim pulse stirring between her thighs.

From that point on, it’s a gradual escalation that, frankly, she should have seen coming.

He becomes obsessed with situating himself in her pockets, be they pants, skirt, or shirt. Any time he experiences so much as a modicum of stress, he seizes it as an opportunity to be tiny and close to her, seeking comfort in the same ways he always has, but with the added benefit of not pestering Madelyn when she has important matters to tend to. Besides, this little ritual of theirs has significantly improved his temperament.

It doesn’t hurt that she’s begun to enjoy it herself.

When the day comes that he storms into her office, pitching some kind of fit that a news station has run a cutting exposé on one of his recent heroic endeavors–citing a wealth of unnecessary collateral damage that she had already thoroughly reprimanded him for–she’s quick to reach for the stash of serums she now keeps in a small fridge behind her desk.

It isn’t until he’s nestled contentedly in the circle of her fingers that she realizes she doesn’t have pockets in this outfit.

With a thoughtful click of her tongue, she makes a choice and partially unbuttons her blouse. “Be good,” she tells him, and sets him on the curve of her breast, tucking him into just the top of her bra. She’s certain that she’s never seen him so delighted, nor has she ever felt him take so long to get comfortable. 

The pulse between her legs has grown to a steady throb, and she can no longer deny that this is almost as much for her as it is for him.

The cup of her bra immediately becomes his new favorite spot. He’s even less conspicuous there than he’d been in her breast pocket, and she doesn’t have to worry as much about someone taking note of him as she goes about her work day. They’ve both begun to look forward to these days, to the point where Madelyn will often shuffle his schedule around in order to ensure he has at least one full day free of duty.

The dam doesn’t truly break until one such day she feels him shuffle down lower, squirming more than usual, followed by a pleasant little pinch that makes her whole body jolt. “What are you doing in there?” She asks with a furrow of her brows, hooking her fingers delicately over her blouse and bra, peering inside.

She finds Homelander pressed snugly between her bra and her breast, cupping her nipple between his hands, face pressed into it. She realizes that his squirming was him grinding against her. He turns his head to look sheepishly up at her, muttering something she can’t hear due to his size. He’s flushed thoroughly pink, looking like he expects to be reprimanded. She swallows thickly, the aching throb of her clit doubling at the needy sight of him tucked in against her.

Breathing a touch shallower, she gives him the barest hint of a nod and covers him back up, cupping her breast instead, feeling him in her palm through the layers of her shirt. He starts thrusting again, grinding against her soft skin, squeezing and nuzzling at her nipple with more vigor now. She shivers, holding him tight to her chest while she deftly unbuttons her skirt with her other hand, slipping her fingers into her underwear.

She fingers herself to the feel of him writhing against her until she comes. Neither of them speak of it, nor his tiny soiled suit.

After that, they stop bothering with the tiny suit altogether during these times. Seems foolish to keep making a mess of it. Besides, she takes (perhaps too much) pleasure in stripping him of each piece, holding him delicately in her hand as she pinches his gloves between her middle finger and thumb, sliding it off and setting each one to the side. He’s entirely malleable as she does it, watching her with parted lips and heavily lidded, love drunk eyes.

It’s been a busy few weeks since they were able to do this, and her skin is already prickling with anticipation. She’s wearing a dress today, and as per usual, she slips him into the cup of her bra to get comfortable as he pleases.

She’s worked up enough that she has to lay back while he gets settled, closing her eyes to enjoy the moment. Her heart is already beating in her clit, and he’s taking longer than usual to establish himself. “Homelander,” she warns, giving him a light pat through her shirt. “Settle down.”

He doesn’t, though. Instead, he pulls himself out entirely, popping up from the neckline of her dress. He swings his arm, beckoning her, and she picks him up, bringing him close to her ear once she realizes he wants to speak.

“I can hear you throbbing in your underwear, Madelyn,” he says, voice thoroughly addled with his own lust. “Why don’t you stick me where you really want me?”

Drawing her hand away, she shoots him a critical look. “You think you’ve earned that?”

He nods enthusiastically, looking equal parts convinced of it and hopeful that she is as well.

She supposes that he has been particularly well-behaved as of late. Is this why? Has he been listening to her arousal all this time, plotting the day he would be pressed against the heat of it? She can’t deny that she’s thought about it, too; wondered if he would feel anything like the vibrator she had pressed to her clit while she was thinking about it.

Slowly, with him sitting naked and eager in the palm of her hand, his cock full and hard, she stands up. He’s starting to look nervous, clearly beginning to think he’s overstepped. She waits until he looks just about ready to apologize or burst into tears—or both, frankly—before she hooks her fingers beneath the hem of her dress and slides it up her thigh.

“Be good,” she tells him, though it's a significantly more salacious demand than the first time she said it in this context.

With that, she closes her fingers around him and slips him into her underwear, releasing him into the narrow space between her cotton panties and her pulsing cunt.

A shiver rolls up her spine. She’s immediately hyper aware of him moving, adjusting until he finds a comfortable way to align against her. Her heart is racing, and she waits until he stops moving before she sits down.

Unlike when he’s tucked into her bra, she’s unable to think of anything other than the feel of him, especially once she’s sitting. She swears she can feel every single one of his movements, which feel more intentional than ever. It’s not as though she’ll crush or smother him; they tested him, and he’s just as durable as he is at his full size. 

He’s not settling like he usually does, either. He hasn’t stopped squirming since she sat down. Instead of chiding him, however, she slips her hand between her thighs and finds his small body with her fingers, letting out a shuddering sigh when she feels him. He isn’t just squirming, he’s thrusting against her, using his unnatural strength to his utmost benefit, writhing against her clit, grinding, using his arms, anything he can, and it feels fucking amazing.

Madelyn moans outright, bracing her other hand against the edge of it in a white-knuckle grip. He’s absolutely relentless, more so than he ever was in her shirt, and it’s everything she imagined it would be and more. The strength he possesses is unreal, and even as small as he is, she feels it in his every movement, how his body practically thrums with it.

She comes with a stifled cry while bent over her desk, every harsh breath sending her documents a little further askew. Only then does he finally stop moving, but throughout her aftershocks she can still feel the inhuman buzz of his body.

Leaning back, she gingerly lifts the waistband of her panties and peers inside, spotting Homelander’s small body. He’s slumped back against her wet panties, glistening and utterly pussy drunk. He offers her a broad, dazed smile.

“Are you alright?” She asks. She’s a little breathless, but she maintains her composed tone of authority well.

He nods, looking positively delirious with pleasure and completely unharmed. She can already tell that he’s come, too, even if she can’t feel the mess of it amongst her own.

“Good,” she says, the word dripping with satisfaction. “You can stay there, then.”

With that, she lets go of her waistband and adjusts her dress back down, running her fingers through her hair while she resettles herself. She leaves him there for the rest of the day, an arrangement that they both wind up being more than content with.

Once settled, he behaves perfectly well for her. Any time she decides she needs a little break from work, all she has to do is rock her hips, and he starts right back up until she’s satisfied once again.