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lintwriting · 5 months ago

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"Goodbye My Danish Sweetheart" and "Love Like You": The Poetry of Envy

by Mitski and Rebecca Sugar respectively

"Comparison is the thief of joy," and "Of all the seven deadly sins, only Envy is no fun at all." In the moment, envy is all the pain of humbled pride and none of its glamor, with only schadenfreude as a reprieve.

But what if you sat with that envy and accepted the humbling, instead of praying for someone else's downfall?

What if you grew to love that which you envied? What if they loved you back? What if you humbled yourself and matured past that petty need?

Well, there's pain in that, too.

Mitski and Rebecca Sugar know it well. They approach it from completely different angles, but it's surprising how closely they match in conclusion: There's a special kind of drama in the pain of disappointing someone you think is better than you.

(And behind it all is self-hatred.)

Goodbye My Danish Sweetheart by Mitski

This song is an apology for ever failing to appreciate someone (or cheating on them), and as you listen to each verse, Mitski is singing in real time on how she's learning to humble herself.

Unlike the soulful croons of Bruno Mars's "When I Was Your Man," which is an ode to the break-up regret caused by feeling lonely again, like he's begging to come back now that he's seen you with someone else, Mitski's verse is less a reaction to her own loneliness and more self-flagellation, like we're listening to a therapy session wherein she explains why she treated you wrong in the first place.

Maybe this is why Miley Cyrus wrote a girlboss anthem ("I can buy my own flowers") in response to Bruno ("I should've bought you flowers") and not Mitski ("You can see how it's blossomed for you")/s.

To tell this story, Mitski uses repeating refrains to contextualize the previous, recreating the experience of maturing enough to see your past mistakes and taking advantage of the structure of songs.

The most important repeated line within the song is "There's nobody better than you."

It opens the song, is directed at her ex-lover, and it contradictorily sounds like she's questioning their worth.

Because that is a BOLD statement.

Really Mitski? There's nobody? Nobody at all better than 'you?'

Mitski admits to this boldness with the next line: "It took me a while 'til I knew."

That there is what she's apologizing for—a failure to appreciate them. A microcosm of the song in the first two lines.

Her mistake is direct contrast with her lover, who "knew from the start it was us, didn't you?"

This is how Mitski characterizes what makes her lover the best.

The undisputed number one person whom no one can be "better than" is simply someone who had faith in 'us,' in Mitski.

All the while Mitski makes excuses: "It just took me a while 'till I knew"

The ambiguity of the phrase is useful. Not “took too long” but just “a while.”

“Just” is also an excusatory statement. I just forgot. I just didn’t notice. Just protects pride. This is a prideful thing to say, to be in the position to judge someone (and failing to judge them correctly)

Skipping to the chorus, the refrain is:

And I don't blame you

If you want to bury me in your memory

The first time you hear this, it's Mitski describing the pain of understanding why someone would want to forget you.

I'm not the girl I ought to be, but

"Ought" is doing a lot of the heavy lifting, implying a failure to do good.

Maybe when you tell your friends

You can tell them what you saw in me

And not how I turned out to be

This ‘saw in me’ transforms "bury me in your memory" from a line about forgetting Mitski to a line about only keeping alive the memory of what Mitski could’ve been—her lover's idealized version of her.

In effect, she wants to kill and bury that part of herself that failed to justify her lover's faith in her, the part that disappointed them. Self-hatred!

Thus, "ought to be" and "not how I turned out to be" become lines about failing to meet their expectations. This last line is the one that changes meaningfully with each refrain, recontextualizing the previous. In the next chorus, she sings:

And not the way I am

Instead of "not how I turned out to be."

With "Turned out to be" in the past tense and "I am" in the present tense, the changing of lines indicate a progression of time.

Not only a progression of time, but growth over that time as well, since "I am" creates the sense that Mitski is actively accepting that she was at fault for the break-up, while "turned out to be" created the sense that she was distancing herself from that before through its passive voice.

With the introduction of "I am," she demonstrates, in comparison, how much "turned out to be" protected her pride, recreating the experience of maturing enough to see the past clearly.

In the last chorus, she sings:

But could we be what we're meant to be?

I'm just about to beg you, please

And then, when you tell your friends

You can tell them what you saw in me

And not the way I used to be

With the last refrain of the chorus, she's begging to come back and be the couple her lover believed in, but it's to demonstrate that she's changed for the better, not just because she's lonely or jealous.

This is because the focus is on how, instead of "way I am," it's "way I used to be." She's recontextualizing herself as having matured, once again, past her previous mindset.

In this case, she's saying it'll be different this time because she's buried who she "used to be," or the self that didn't appreciate them as she should've. And she proves it with the last line that bookends the song:

'Cause there is nobody better than you

In effect, the whole song is a thesis on why there really is "nobody better than you," and THAT in itself proves that she's changed! It's a song about the lowering of herself and her pride, of recognizing that they're better than her, and of recognizing the pain of having disappointed them because of how much better they are.

Love Like You by Rebecca Sugar

One of the best parts about this song is the way it truly works as an ED song to Steven Universe. It, in effect, is the theme of the whole show, and therefore it works to embody the ...theme of the whole show, which is the transformative power of love.

This song can basically represent the relationship between any two characters in the show in BOTH directions—Rose Quartz and Greg Universe, Greg and Steven, Steven and the Gems, Steven and The Diamonds, etc. And it's such a poignant message as well, managing to create depth with nuances like how self-hatred affects your ability to love, the importance of connection in healing from trauma, and even the limiting nature of only having one perspective—again, all those being themes within the show itself.

Video by Let's Talk Cartoons that talks about this theory that it's about Rose. This theory is right, but misses the point that EVERYONE deals with this in the show lol not just Rose.

If I could begin to be

Half of what you think of me

These two lines are a microcosm of the song, as Mitski's first two lines were, and, like Mitski's song, it's about the disappointment of someone who has faith in you. Someone better than you, as implied by the next two lines.

I could do about anything

I could not put this any better than Rebecca Sugar has already put it, which is characteristic of good poetry!

They think of you so highly that achieving even half of their expectations would be hanging the damn moon! What I'd like to bring your attention to is that it's the same characterization that Mitski used for her lover—part of what makes them so amazing is simply how much faith they put in you!

Within Steven Universe, everybody has had experiences with betrayal of trust and the resulting fear of ever putting your faith in someone again. So this kind of earth-shattering faith can seem naive, but doing so with full knowledge of its pain reveals a kind of invulnerability and confidence that would make someone seem someone god-like, hence your idolization of them.

I could even learn how to love

This line is the one that gets recontextualized over the course of the song, like Mitski's "There's nobody better than you." The idea that someone loves poorly or can't love, though I will say, is beautiful and relatable.

The next refrain of it:

I could do about anything

I could even learn how to love like you

"Like you" is the magic phrase!

Because while they have a god-like faith in others, being on the receiving end of it—that's buoying, too! Much like people have "faith" in god, your idolization of them represents your own earth-shattering faith in the opposite direction! It's a mutual idolization! You're loving "like them." It's a faith that spurs you to do better in return!

But better than what? That's where the verse comes in:

I always thought I might be bad

Now I'm sure that it's true

'Cause I think you're so good

And I'm nothing like you

Comparison is the thief of joy, and unfortunately you've compared yourself to them and found you don't measure up. You're using your faith in them for your own self-deprecation. But, this is tempered by the next lines.

I just adore you

I wish that I knew

What makes you think I'm so special

The last one is a conflict resolving line. It reveals that this painful, comparison-based self-hatred isn't just something you're doing, but something they could be doing as well, as it highlights that the faith is mutual. That although you think they're special, they think you are, too!

And therefore that—since you're so alike—that they could also be struggling with the pain of thinking they're not enough. It's this mutual aspect that makes this song sing, why it works so well to connect basically all the characters of the show in any combination.

This is further supported by the next refrain:

I would do about anything

I would even learn how to love

When I see the way you look

Shaken by how long it took

I could even learn how to love like you

The fact that the "Love like you" refrain follows this "mutual" revelation then implies that loving IS truly "seeing" them by seeing yourself in them, and the way this relationship/self-hatred/revelation is mirrored on this other side.

You're both shaken by how long this took!

Love like you

Love me like you

And this line is the natural end of this line of thought. You can't learn to love without loving yourself first, but being loved and loving in return can teach you how to love yourself. You can learn how to love yourself by following their lead.

But also-- in this song, to love someone else means you see yourself in them—and therefore you learn to love the part of you that's in them.

Comparative Analysis

Mitski's "nobody better than you" and "took me a while 'till I knew" and Sugar's "nothing like you" and "love like you" are repeated throughout the song as symbols of their object of envy.

They're better than you because of their faith in you, in contrast to your own disappointment in yourself. To reach their level, you have to learn to have faith, either in them (Mitski) or yourself (Rebecca Sugar).

There are slight differences. While in Sugar's version, their faith in you helps you respect yourself, Mitski's is about learning to reciprocate her lover's faith to restore her faith in herself, as she's starting the song from a place of unfaithfulness and regret. Her self-hatred is less self-destructive and more a motivator to improve. In Sugar's song, the threat of disappointment/unfaithfulness looms in the background, but the singer didn't actually disappoint. Or if they did, their 'idol' is strong enough to still have faith in them, in spite of that.

In the end, it's a healing of envy, of the sin of comparing yourself to others. Because the answer isn't taking them down, or stewing in your own self-hatred, it's learning to accept yourself where you're at.

Whether it's by embracing your flaws and improving, or loving the part of you that you see in them.

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ts1989fanatic · 1 year ago

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Have We Reached Peak Taylor Swift? The Psychology Behind When Someone Becomes Overexposed.

Is Taylor Swift about to be in her 'overexposed' era?

Midway through the Eras Tour, Taylor Swift is everywhere.

The ongoing tour ― Swift is scheduled to resume the international leg in November ― and the subsequent concert film are certifiable cultural events that have actually boosted regional economies. (In Los Angeles, for instance, where Swift performed six shows, the California Center for Jobs and the Economy predicted a $320 million boost to the county. No wonder Canada’s prime minister Justin Trudeau practically begged the Grammy winner to visit up north.)

She’s even bolstering the NFL’s viewership: Since the “Cruel Summer”

singer started attending her boyfriend Travis Kelce’s Kansas City Chiefs games, the league has seen some Super Bowl-level numbers thanks to all the Swifties tuning in.

Meanwhile, the media coverage is breathless. While daytime talk show hosts ask Kelce’s mom about Swift, there’s play-by-play of the couple’s dates around the web: “They were in a rounded booth sitting super close to each other in deep convo the whole time,” a diner at the Waverly Inn in Greenwich, where Swift and Kelce dined on Sunday, told The Messenger. “It looked super romantic and was super intimate.”

But given Swift’s cultural dominance ― and NFL fans booing an ad for her concert doc early this month ― even her fans are a little worried that Taylor fatigue might soon set in. Is Swift due for another “overexposed” era?

“Kinda overwhelmed by how close Taylor is to overexposure,” one fan tweeted on X.

“You either die the hero or live long enough to admit that you have Taylor Swift fatigue,” another wrote on the site.

On the main Swift subreddit, fans debate if Swift will eventually go back into pop star hibernation like she did after her “1989” album.

Indeed, this isn’t Swift’s first go-around with overexposure. The success of “1989” in 2014 was followed by a heightened interest in Swift’s personal life: her famous friends (or her “squad”), her ill-fated romance with Tom Hiddleston, her drama with Kanye West and Kim Kardashian. In response, Swift made a “conscious choice to disappear” and opt for a more “lowkey” life, a source close to the singer told People at the time.

Her rollout of her next album, 2017’s “Reputation,” was relatively quiet. (“There will be no further explanation. There will just be reputation,” Swift remarked on Instagram.)

Swift seems to pay close attention to her fandom and cultivate those parasocial relationships, said Lynn Zubernis, a psychologist and professor at West Chester University who researches fan psychology.

“Who knows, she might consider withdrawing from the spotlight again at some point,” Zubernis told HuffPost.

The professor likened the “Anti-Hero” singer’s ubiquity right now to Barney in the ’90s. Parents loved the purple dinosaur initially (no one kept their kids as entertained), but that love soured by the 104th listen of the “I love you, you love me” theme song.

“Familiarity is part of what drives fandom — we’re wired to attach to familiar faces, whether they’re offline or on our screens — but there’s a limit to how much repetition we can tolerate,” Zubernis said. “Too many instances of someone popping up and behaving the same way or saying the same thing can start to grate.”

The overexposure is sometimes exacerbated by the celebrity being perceived as “trying too hard” or being inauthentic, Zubernis said: Miley Cyrus, Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, even Lady Gaga come to mind, she said.

“At first their ‘antics’ were popular, but people soon grew tired and cynical about them,” she said. “Justin Bieber, James Franco, Shai LaBeouf and Kanye West fall into that category too, and all have been on lists of ‘celebrities we’re tired of’ as a result.”

There’s also a common trajectory that fandom tends to take: Fans love to root for their favorite celebrity ― or sports team or TV series ― because of that vicarious sense of success they gain, but there’s also a cost to that success and visibility, Zubernis said. Some fans jump ship.

“Fans also relish feeling ‘special’ and seeing their fandom as exclusive ― as in, we are the only ones who see how truly special this person is and appreciate her,” the professor said.

“Once someone like Swift becomes beloved by everyone, even ‘normies,’ the fandom doesn’t feel as exclusive anymore,” she added. (Think how in high school, you used to say, “Yeah, I liked that band when they were still underground.”)

Jaye L. Derrick, an associate professor of psychology who studies parasocial relationships at the University of Houston, has a different take: She thinks that most of the people complaining about Swift were never fans to begin with.

“She has a very large following, but no celebrity can make 100% of the population like them,” Derrick told HuffPost.

“As Taylor Swift is shown to new markets, she is meeting some pushback from people who may have been aware of her before but never sought her out,” she said. “I suspect that most of the negative exposure is from people who had maybe consciously avoided her before and are not able to avoid her anymore.”

Tracy Gleason, the chair and professor of psychology at Wellesley College and an author of a paper on parasocial relationships, agrees with Derrick. The fans at the Giants game who booed her ad, for instance, might have done so because she’s dating a player on a rival team.

“Another possible explanation for the football game is that people who are fans of football, some of whom are likely women, are not necessarily fans of Taylor Swift,” Gleason told HuffPost. “Seeing Taylor get more attention than the game itself might have felt distracting and annoying.”

“Who knows, though,” she added. “Maybe they are Swifties but just want to keep each of the things they enjoy in their own lane: Taylor belongs on the stage and football belongs in the arena.”

Is misogyny at play when we deem someone “overexposed”?

When it comes to conversations about fame, some have pointed out that it tends to be women that get the whiplash “love-hate” treatment: They’re celebrated at first, then they’re deemed overexposed, like Anne Hathaway or Jennifer Lawrence were after their respective Oscar campaigns.

For the most part, men have more room to navigate fame: There’s a double-standard for the type of behavior that is considered appropriate for men versus for women, Derrick said.

For starters, men are expected to express their agency, so they are allowed to promote their projects.

“For women, it is harder to engage in agentic behavior without people viewing them as too in-your-face,” Derrick said. “In American society, we traditionally expect women to be more communal and less agentic.” (Swift addresses this complicated bind for women in the song “The Man” from 2019 album “Lover.”)

The professor thinks these women would probably get a pass if they were “trying too hard” to promote something communal, like a charity, but over-promoting yourself is a cardinal sin in celebritydom if you’re a woman.

With male examples of overexposure, it usually results from some publicly frowned-upon behavior: Bieber was a notoriously bratty teen (which is hardly a crime, of course, but his reputation persists), West was accused of antisemitism, Franco and LaBeouf were both accused of sexual misconduct, and Elon Musk has been accused of not only damaging Twitter (or as he’s rebranded, X) but threatening democracy itself.

Women celebrities are shamed for bad behavior, too, of course, but also for deviating from social expectations, Zubernis said.

“The culture still isn’t all that comfortable with women being very visible or powerful or successful in some way; that idea is vaguely threatening to the status quo,” she said. “I think that would apply to Swift, Hathaway and Lawrence.”

If you were a fan of any of those women to begin with, though, you probably stuck by them through and through. Fandoms tend to be ride or die until something truly cancellable happens.

“There are times when fans will turn on a celebrity, but those are usually cases where the celebrity did something out-of-character that led people to become disillusioned with their brand,” Derrick said.

In other words, when it comes to these “overexposed” claims ― or criticism from non-fans who wish Swift would take a sabbatical ― Swifties worldwide are probably just going to “shake it off.”

ts1989fanatic:

So Michael Jackson in his prime was everywhere and until he went off the deep end was beloved by fans and none fans worldwide. But Taylor Swift who has in my opinion reached MJ status is over exposed, you know this was not really a thing until she started dating Travis Kelce.

So to answer the question posed above

Is misogyny at play when we deem someone “overexposed”?

In the case of Taylor Swift damn straight misogyny is at play, all these talking heads and college professors and the rest of the media jackals and TS haters need to just FUCK THE HELL OFF.

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acosmicdisappointment · 9 months ago

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— mallory jade.

is that RENEÉ RAPP? oh, no, that’s MALLORY JADE WATSON, a TWENTY-FIVE year old SINGER/FORMER CHILD ACTRESS (GONE WILD) who uses SHE/HER pronouns. they currently live in VALPARAÍSO, and the character they identify with most is SANTANA LOPEZ FROM GLEE. hopefully they find their own little paradise here in el país de los poetas!

BASICS.

FULL NAME. mallory jade watson NICKNAME(S). mallory jade (NEVER JUST JADE), mallory, mally, mal AGE/BIRTHDAY/ZODIAC. 25 / june 10th / gemini SEXUALITY. chaotic lesbian BIRTHPLACE. los angeles, california HEIGHT. 5'7" EYE COLOR. blue ILLNESSES/CONDITIONS. a chaotic and mean lesbian TATTOOS/PIERCINGS/SCARS. standard lobe and upper lobe piercings, double helix, has a little tramp stamp, a cheeky tattoo, a scar on both knees, right shin, and left elbow FC. reneé rapp

PERSONALITY.

blunt headstrong fiercly loyal and supportive overconfident judgmental bitchy

HER-STORY.

— Born into a family with a deep-rooted history in the industry (ehem nepo baby), Mallory was destined for stardom. With her cherubic face and natural talent, she quickly became a household name, starring in hit TV shows and movies. She was known as ‘Jade Watson’ back then (Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus and Amanda Bynes filmography claim). — However, as Mallory transitioned into her teenage years, the pressures of fame began to take their toll. Growing up in the spotlight, Mallory struggled to navigate the complexities of adolescence under the watchful eyes of the public. — She felt like she couldn’t breathe with all the pressure of being a celebrity. Mallory couldn’t fully express her true self, as she was boxed in a stereotype of being the 'good girl’. — At 18, Mallory started to rebel against the image that had been carefully crafted for her, yearning for the freedom to explore her own identity. Inspired by the rebellious characters she portrayed on screen, Mallory began to embrace a more daring persona thus choosing to go by Mallory instead of Jade.* (Jade is a good luck stone while the name Mallory meant 'unlucky’; the irony really) — Somewhere in the middle of all that, she fell in love with her female co-star and best friend. It was sort of a chemistry off the charts kind of thing. I’m talking about them going out together, posting cutesy things and then people shipping them. Mal kinda misread all that and fell in love. — I’m talking down bad, like she wrote a song about them. Finally, she gathered the courage to confess, hoping her love would be reciprocated and then this girl was like ‘whaaaat?’ and maybe laughed at her face. So yeah, poor baby girl was heartbroken has never been the same. — This was when Mallory decided to leave behind acting and just focus on making music (Reneé Rapp, Chappell Roan, and Miley Cyrus discography). She became a little reckless from the heartbreak and thus began the string of multiple scandals. — She had a string of short-lived, intense relationships. Mallory was a serial ghoster, always running away from any hint of commitment in fear of what happened before. She would ignore her own feelings, burying them beneath layers of bravado and sass. — She thrived on drama and excitement, always seeking out the next big thrill. Mallory was fiercely independent and unapologetically herself. She refused to be boxed in by society’s expectations, instead forging her own path, consequences be damned. — Her parents decided that it was best if she stayed away from the spotlight and lay low, making her move to Valparaíso while they try and clean up her mess. And there she was living her most unapologetic life in the region.

EXTRAS.

to read to see to listen

HEADCANONS.

— certified girl kisser™ — would be the type to randomly ask "do you wanna make out?" or "are we about to kiss right now?" (will keep you guessing if she's serious or not) — had her first (and last) boyfriend at the age of 13, immediately knew boys didn't do it for her — a MASSIVE flirt and would call everyone a pet name (she has a hard time remembering names so this is easier) — is a serial GHOSTER and absolutely doesn't want to commit — can't cook for shit (will always eat you out) — always gets hurt on her birthday (it's a reneé rapp canon as well) — her facial expressions are enough to tell you how she's feeling

WANTED CONNECTIONS/PLOTS.

going ghost! — what's more awkward than seeing someone you pulled a vanishing act on fun silly little girl time — friends she can just let loose with i'm your biggest fan — someone who remembers her as a child actress and is a fan of her work (both now and then) more tbd! my dm's open if you wanna plot!

#valpohqintro #꒰ঌ ໒꒱ — mallory jade: you're like in love with me

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misfitwashere · 10 months ago

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youtube

Bye Melanie. Thanks. Thanks for all of it.

From Newser:

Melanie, a folk singer who performed at Woodstock in 1969—solo and petrified—before having major pop hits with "Brand New Key" and "Lay Down (Candles in the Rain)," has died. The singer whose full name was Melanie Safka was 76. "She was one of the most talented, strong and passionate women of the era," her family said in a statement, "and every word she wrote, every note she sang reflected that." In a message to the singer's fans, Variety reports, her children asked that, at 10pm Central time on Wednesday, "each of you lights a candle in honor of Melanie."

She was a regular in the New York folk clubs, per the New York Times, but unknown nationally when she was helicoptered in to take the stage with her guitar at the Woodstock Festival in upstate New York. She was nervous from the start about performing before hundreds of thousands of people who also were seeing Joan Baez, Jimi Hendrix, and the Who. She was 22, one of three women scheduled to perform solo at the festival. "The terror kept building in me," she later told the AP. When the weather changed, she expected the event to be called off. "It's raining, I'm free, I'll go back to life as it was," Melanie thought to herself. "Maybe I will be an archaeologist; maybe I will join the Peace Corps. That's when they said, 'You're next.'" She emerged as one of the surprise stars of Woodstock.

Seeing people at Woodstock light candles as it rained inspired her first pop hit, "Lay Down (Candles in the Rain)," a gospel-flavored song recorded with the Edwin Hawkins Singers. Others hits included "What Have They Done to My Song, Ma"—which she reprised in a duet with Miley Cyrus in 2015—and "Peace Will Come," per the Hollywood Reporter. She wrote "Brand New Key" in 15 minutes. "I thought it was cute, a kind of old '30s tune," she said. But while some listeners heard a children's tune, others heard sexual innuendo-packed lyrics, per Variety. "I guess a key and a lock have always been Freudian symbols," Melanie said, "and pretty obvious ones at that." She worked on her 32nd album in the studio earlier this month, her label said.

#Melanie Safka

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reviewsbyliam · 1 year ago

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Robbie Z

INTERVIEW #01

18.09.2023

Written by LW

Photos via @iamrobbiez (IG)

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Waking up and realizing the life you're living isn't exactly what you desire anymore and deciding to pursue your passion, move to a city in another country and devote yourself to trying to become somebody in the world can be an extremely scary thought for many, but not for this one person.

Today, the first guest on my blog that has been kind enough to sit and speak with me about the stories behind not only himself but also his music and the pain and happiness that has accompanied him along the way is aspiring independent artist, Robbie Z.

L: Hey, Robbie! Thank you for taking the time to speak with me about yourself and your career today, I really appreciate it! You are the first artist to be interviewed on my blog, so it is an absolute pleasure of mine to accommodate your story today!

R: Hi Liam, so nice to meet you! Congratulations on starting your blog! This is really cool, good luck with it! And thank you for having me as your first guest, it's an honour!

L: Thank you so much, Robbie! It's kind of crazy and I cant thank you enough for the opportunity to do this together, now let's get into it!

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L: You started your professional career in 2018, it's now 2023, whats the journey been like for you?

R: Ahh, it's been so exciting! Music is what I want to do long term. It's my passion, so growing up doing that and learning from my mistakes has been amazing. It's an amazing thing that I started so young to be honest. I always knew I wanted to do this; I started recording covers in 2014, when I was 11/12 and started writing my own music when I was 15 in 2017! So, when I was around 14, I thought "huh.. I wanna do that? Then I might as well start now if I wanna get good at it young." Because when I started I was really bad haha… but it also helped me get thick skin in terms of bullying etc. it's been amazing, but it's truly only the beginning!

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L: I've seen that you have inspiration from Iggy Azalea, who else in the music industry compels you to want to do more?

R: I've always been a fanboy.. Some incredible women besides Iggy who "raised me" as an artist are definitely; Selena Gomez and Miley Cyrus. More recently, I've been really loving Madison Beer, Lil Nas X, Olivia Rodrigo, Charli XCX, Taylor Swift.. I get really inspired by these artists to work hard and achieve all my goals. It really drives me forward.

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L: The vibe of The Butterfly Trap is very fresh, a total feeling myself energy, but it also includes emotional parts that relate to the listeners life - what kind of vibe can we expect from the new project?

R: Ahhh, thank you! Writing the first EP, I was kind of in a tough spot mentally.. I wrote it from the ages of 18 to 19 and I was going through a lot of stuff that I couldn't understand in my life which made me very confused, sad, angry… This new project is totally different.

First of all, it's elevated in terms of quality in the songwriting, recording etc. Secondly, in "The Butterfly Trap", I was really vague while talking about the struggles.. Masking them in a lot of metaphors. I was afraid to speak of these topics in songs as I was still going through what I was going through while writing. This new project "Dear Diary," is more so me reflecting on situations whilst also having fun, a less anxious, more out going alter-ego of mine! But, as fun as it is, it also has some deep messages that really cut deep for me and it just even feels a little uncomfortable when someone listens to some of these new songs as they're so personal to me. Hence the name, "Dear Diary". It's supposed to be inspirational and honest, but it also talks about lots of different topics such as following your dreams, getting your dreams taken away from you, one sided love, letting yourself live freely.. It's basically 6 different diary entrees of mine put into songs.

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L: I've noticed you have a lot of unique sounds. Do you enjoy being multi genre and having the ability to switch flows whilst also being able to use sounds that seperate you from the rest?

R: Honestly? I love mixing genres. I love rap verses with pop hooks, rock hooks, punk, ballads, anything. But, I've been spending time trying to find my sound and I think I've finally found one that is just perfectly me, right now. This new single '5 Dollars & a Dream' is exactly what I would want to be remembered with regarding the genre, flow, lyrics etc. I don't want to give myself any labels as a "pop artist" or a "rock artist" etc. I just consider myself a rapper/singer who likes to change. But Pop Rap is what I would describe it as if I have to!

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L: 5 dollars + a dream (a song that is beautiful by the way and extremely reminiscent of Iggy's earlier work which I LOVE entirely) , whats the story behind this track and what was the process like behind making it?

R: Oh my god, thank you so so much!! This song means the most to me so I really appreciate the nice words. The story behind the track… I think it's pretty straight forward to be honest, which is why I'm a little afraid of people hearing it. It's about knowing what you want to do, having started that and just following your dreams (as lame as it sounds). The song talks about some parts of my story, which I've never been vulnerable about in songs before. And not letting myself give up. Making the song was an absolute blast. One night a few years ago I was in my bed, in my home town in Bulgaria, and I thought of the phrase "I got five dollars and a dream…" with the melody and I wrote it down, then last year as I was packing up to move to London, I wrote the first verse which goes like "I took all of my belongings and I put them in a suitcase…" Initially I wanted it to be a song I write for my first album one day, but it just felt right so I brought it to my producer "SojBoj" , we made the instrumental and a demo and then I wrote the second verse and recorded it! It was really fun!

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L: There is a lot that goes into being an independent artist, how has that been for you so far? Have you had any label offers yet?

R: Being indie or signed each have their own ups and downs / good and bad sides, it just really depends on what an artist wants.. For me? I've been fortunate enough to grow, learn and find myself as an independent artist. I couldn't imagine starting out with a record deal from the beginning. But now I feel I'm ready to get signed and get this party started. Being indie obviously gives me the opportunity to have full creative control which I'm not willing to sacrifice. Whilst it's not for everyone, for me, when the right deal comes, it'll definitely be something I do, because the connections and resources a label has are so worth it for a young artist like me.

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L: Who have been your main musical inspirations behind this new project thats coming later this year?

R: Ahh! Well, whilst there hasn't been a specific one, I'd say, of course I'm always super influenced by Iggy Azalea; especially her first album 'The New Classic'. '5 Dollars & a Dream' is actually kind of inspired by her song 'Work'. But I'm also now inspired by a lot of punk rock music, more contemporary pop-rocky songs, A lot of just everyday things that I romanticise and turn into songs. Sonically, I make what I want to hear, putting my own input on the kind of music I like. Like a mixture of everything I like, quite literally.

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L: You're doing a show at the Metre Squared In London after the single drops, are you excited to perform and what should people expect to see?

R: I love performing! Back in Bulgaria, I had some performing experience, but when Covid hit, it was hard to get performances.. I did a car-concert, it was super fun! I was in a big truck performing to around 100 cars! I was an opening act for a drive-in movie theatre. When I moved to London though, that is when it really started for me with the performances. I've done some shows the past year that amazed me with the amount of people who came to have fun and listen to music, but also the people who actually know my songs and connect with it, it's my favourite thing in the world. The show is coming up on the 14th of October in Metre Squared in London, and tickets for that show are on sale now! I'm super excited. It'll be the first time I perform my EP, prior to it's release!

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L: With your new music coming very rapidly, and a show coming up around the corner, are you looking forward to what the future holds for you and where your art will take you?

R: I am a very goal orientated person, I've got lots of big and smaller goals that I will accomplish soon. I don't like sharing those before they come true, but I have to say; I've got something that I'm working really hard for that I really hope to get to do within the next year. Plus also, always lots of new music! I've got stuff planned for even after the EP, and my releases will become more often too!

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L: For our last question, Robbie, I want to ask you - who in the music industry, whether it be a singer, rapper, producer, writer, absolutely anyone, who would you love to work with the most and why?

R: There's a bunch of people I admire and would find it an honour to work with, but off the top of my head, I'd say a producer that I would really want to work with one day is Jack Antonoff! He's incredible, it seems like to be so much fun working with him. Dan Nigro is another one, he created Olivia Rodrigo's first two albums with her, he's amazing! Artist-wise, Iggy Azalea. She inspired me to start all of this craziness, she helped me find my path when I was really young and I just admire her for a hundred other reasons, it would be CRAZY. I think maybe a song of mine with Ice Spice or Charli XCX would be so fun too! Me and Charli XCX have to make a song about cars together one day!

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L: Well, Robbie, it has been absolutely beautiful and a true pleasure speaking with you and getting to hear your thoughts about your music and everything to do with your grind! I would also like to thank you for letting me hear your new single prior to release! I am excited for whats to come from your career given the product that we already have from you and the world should prepare themselves for the undeniable force that is yourself!

R: Thank you so much for having me, Liam. It means so so much to me, the questions were great, they made me think deeper and I really enjoyed it!

L: I'm glad to hear that, Robbie! Once again, thank you SO much for being my first guest on my blog and hopefully this wont be the last time we speak! I look forward to hearing your new EP!

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To anyone reading; Robbie Z's new single '5 Dollars & a Dream' from his new EP 'Dear Diary,' comes out this Friday, September 22nd!

It'd mean the world to me, as his interviewer and to him as an indie artist if you gave it a listen!

You can also buy tickets to his upcoming show on October 14th at Metre Squared in London in his INSTA BIO (@iamrobbiez)!

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Thank you for reading my FIRST EVER INTERVIEW!

Please help boost a small blogger by sharing this article with your friends and family or followers!

I’ll be forever grateful!

Please make sure to give me a follow on the socials below too so you don’t miss out on any NEW content!

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justfor2am · 2 years ago

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hi my interview has been rescheduled once again because of course it is ^_^ nothing wants me to be interviewed ig ^_^ anyways 🥺😈🛒🎢✨💋🎶⛔🍦🌞💖💌❌🧐🦅👀🤗💞🧠🤩🤯💔🤭 for the fanfic writer asks or wtevr they're called??? didn't realize until just now u even rbed an ask game so apologies 🫡 side note the 💥 emoji is so fun . its just like 💥💥💥💥💥 yk??? also feel free to skip any of those i just threw down the ones i think would be most interesting but as usual there r many

i am manifesting an interview AND a job for u, get that bag king!!!

also waough ty for giving me an excuse to talk abt my blorbos 🥺🥺🥺

and ya 💥 feels like ur comboing someone really well in a fighting game, like 💥💥💥 K.O. yanno?

this is def gonna be a long one tho soooo the rest underneath the cut this goes lmao

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

Anything having to do with touch. I'm a sucker for physical gestures, so anything that involves details like brushing someone's hair out of their eyes, hooking a tentative pinky around someone else's hand, it doesn't need to be overt to get me in my feels every single time.

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

Yes! I threatened a major character death in [though I've closed my eyes, I know who you pretend I am] late in the final (12th) chapter lmao

I knew that being that late into the fic most people would've forgotten what the specific tags were and even less would be willing to scrolling all the way back up to check lol

🛒 What are some common things you incorporate in your fics? Themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

Like I said in the first Q, touch is a big thing for me. Eyes and anything having to do with vision also tends to be a big one, if you read a fic with both of those elements there's a decent chance I wrote it.

As far as overarching things, I prefer to write scenery over dialogue, and put a heavy emphasis on describing what the characters are feeling/thinking over having them verbally express it.

🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

I wanna say my [detroit become human au] has shit hit the fan pretty quickly. The fic opens with the conflict and it takes a few chapters for the reader to get any context, but once you've got it, going back to the start just makes your heart break.

✨ Give you and your writing a compliment. Go on now. You know you deserve it. 😉

booo hiss grrr

no but actually uhhhhhh... I will say that when I've got a good idea rattling around in my head, I can churn out a fic for that premise very quickly. to the point that i accidentally wrote three chapters for one of my fics all within a day, because I'm unhinged like that

💋 First kiss fics. Love em or hate em?

LOVE but only if they're done right. I appreciate first kiss fics that aren't perfect or a little clumsy, but also i'm a sucker for those picture perfect moments too

🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

YA i do my best writing with some music on. I've been listening to a mix of things lately (Love from the Other Side by FOB, that new Shakira collab, and Flowers by Miley Cyrus) but i've also been looping my 14+ hour long exo playlist

⛔ Do you have a fic you started, but scrapped?

I had a sculk!Grian fic from like, I wanna say October last year that I was 1k words into that just. Disappeared. No clue where it went or how I lost but, but in hindsight, it wasn't my best work.

I'm still a bit sad to have lost it, but considerably more proud of the things I've written since.

🍦 What’s the sweetest fic you’ve created so far?

I have come to the realization that I am horrible at writing fluff without some level of conflict within the fic. Whoops! Closest I've got is a [scarian sick fic] that I wrote recently lmao

🌞 Do you have a preferred time of day to write?

Either while I'm at work when it's dead during the day time, or frantically at like, 11 o'clock p.m., there is no in between.

💖 What made you start writing?

Wayyyyy back when I was 12/13 I used to be big into rp, and I came into the realization that the rps I was doing could just as easily be formatting into fics.

None of those fics were ever published, but getting to learn how to edit and rewrite scenes that had been planned out with another person made me want to start creating stories of my own.

💌 How do you feel about comments and feedback?

Love love LOVE comments and feedback. Literally getting a comment is like a serotonin boost directly into my veins to write more, esp comments that'll point out specific scenes or moments/lines they liked.

someone pointed out that they liked the way I described fresh hickeys like blooming violets and I haven't been able to stop thinking about that comment ever since.

❌ What’s a trope you will never write?

That's a good question.... I'm trying to think of one that isn't like, a blatantly obvious icky trope.

I'm not sure if it counts as a trope, but Y/N fics. Not only are their primary function to act as fan service, they end up coming off very RPF to me which I'm not a fan of.

Oh, also RPF. Any fic i write has to do 100% with the characters those people portray, not the real person.

🧐 Do you spend much time researching for your stories?

Depends on the fic! For my [actor au] I've just been kinda flying by the seat of my pants, doing the occasional googling but not much. The opposite of this would be my [detroit become human au] where I literally rewatched jacksepticeye's d:bh playthrough and scoured wikis to make sure i'm describing androids correctly.

tl;dr: generally no, only as needed unless I get fixated on it.

🦅 Do you outline fics or fly by the seat of your pants?

Fly by the seat of my pants, but i'm trying to change this! For my multi-chaptered fics I've started actually planning out future events, and even for this one big one shot im working on, i've got an outline in the works.

...though generally, i don't plan. it's a bad habit.

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

GLADLY so speaking of that big one shot, it's going to be a boatem superhero au, i've started outlining it and getting my concepts together, i'm very excited for it!

here's a snippet:

It was fairly obvious that the Mayor had pulled some strings to get Scar to this stage; once a nobody vigilante who seemed more preoccupied with dazzling the camera over saving lives, Scar's public image had taken a hard left turn during the past few campaigning months.

The situation was more of an open secret— it was all too convenient for Scar, who practically lived in the Mayor's pocket, to be joining the city's most elite crime-fighting team.

it's VERY early in development so don't expect this one for a while tho

🤗 What advice would you give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

I'd say figure out your character's voice is a big one. It's easy to fall into fanon tropes and while they're fun, they can cause lots of warping in the way you write your own fics, which might make them sound off.

So look out for fanon tropes! Personally I've run into people who make Scar very sweet and innocent, to the point of dusting his hands clean of blame. It's an easy hole to fall into, and no one should fault a writer for falling into tropes.

There's a line to walk, and I find that watching content relating to that character really helps shaping that "inner voice".

Also, get someone to proof read your work who is willing to point out your mistakes. Editing/betaing is never meant to be a personal attack, but rather to make sure that the fic you present to the rest of the world is cohesive and clear.

💞 Who’s your comfort character?

Scar! He just gets me fr. He's one of my favorite guys to write because of how versatile and how much variety he has. He could be a silly salesman one minute, and a quietly scary assassin the next. Whatever the bit or joke is, he fully commits to it, often to the detriment of himself, but god does it make for good content.

Also he has a really good narration voice ok

🧠 Pick a character, and I’ll tell you my favorite headcanon for them.

(ty for the speedy discord reply lol)

Grian! my darling baby boy who has every mental illness ever

no but actually, i'd say my favorite grian head canon is anything having to do with him being an alchemist. i want that man brewing potions, getting blown up, and curing all his friends ailments with the most illegal looking brew you've ever seen in your life.

🤩 Who is your favorite character to write?

Grian, mostly because he comes easiest to me! There's such a sense of endless potential when I get ready to write him, and like, idk what it is, but longing too?

We've been getting it pretty heavy w/ his whole "I Miss Mumbo" campaign but like, grian to me feels like someone who's always thinking about reaching a hand out, and pulls it back at the last second. It's very relatable.

🤯 What’s a genre you struggle with as a writer (ex. romance, action, etc.)?

Weirdly enough, it's fluff. I always feel compelled to write stories with some level of conflict or it's not "satisfying" to me. I love reading the genre, but for whatever reason when I write it, I get in my head about if it's "good enough" or not without conflict. I'm working on that lol

💔 Is there a fic of yours that broke your heart?

EDIT: so i misread this, you get fic recs as a bonus. my proper answer is: [my bad ending fae two shot], it will shatter you as it did me </3

i'm going to give two because i do what i want. the first being [It's Only Logical by TSTrashCaptain] which is a sanders sides fic that to this day, i can only dream of writing something so good. tw for themes of abuse and nsfw at times, but god. just reading the title again puts a knot in my heart in the best way possible.

now, this fic. [your heart rots in my hands by thepigeoncat]. this fic slaughtered me the first time i read it. i left a long ass comment on it. tw for major character death, but this is the perfect last life scarian fic.

it's beautiful, and tragic, and it makes me feel as though the world has truly ended /pos. please go read it.

🤭 Do you have a favorite tag to use when posting your works?

my favorite tag for when i post unbetaed work is "no beta we die like scar to the boatem hole"

as far as a REAL tag, hurt/comfort >:))

and my favorite one off funny tag is "i cannot emphasis to you enough how much blood is in this fic"

[fanfic writer emoji asks!]

#justfor2am #justfor2talks #long post

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couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name · 2 years ago

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answer ALL the music asks! 🫶

oh God fine

1:A song you like with a color in the title: welcome to the black parade lol

2:A song you like with a number in the title: 867-5309

3:A song that reminds you of summertime: forever young. very eating water ice on the back porch while lightning bugs just start to come out for the night vibes

4:A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about: breakaway by kelly clarkson lmfao

5:A song that needs to be played LOUD: elevate (from into the spider-verse lmfaoooo)

6:A song that makes you want to dance: mamma mia!

7:A song to drive to: (I don't drive lol)

8:A song about drugs or alcohol: walking in space (from the musical Hair!)

9:A song that makes you happy: good as hell by lizzo

10:A song that makes you sad: the letter (from the musical billy elliot). immediate skip I can't get through it

11:A song that you never get tired of: bring it! (snakes on a plane)

12:A song from your preteen years: poor unfortunate souls (jonas brothers cover!!!)

13:One of your favorite 80’s songs: heaven is a place on earth!

14:A song that you would love played at your wedding: when you look me in the eyes by the jonas brothers. be quiet.

15:A song that is a cover by another artist: miley cyrus' cover of zombie (by the cranberries). it's PERFECT for her voice omg

16:One of your favorite classical songs: not sure!

17:A song that would sing a duet with on karaoke: take me or leave me (from the musical RENT)

18:A song from the year that you were born: turn the beat around lol

19:A song that makes you think about life:

20:A song that has many meanings to you: don't let me get me by p!nk

21:A favorite song with a person’s name in the title: montero!!!

22:A song that moves you forward: always starting over (from If/Then)

23:A song that you think everybody should listen to:

24:A song by a band you wish were still together: honestly can't think of anything here!

25:A song by an artist no longer living: like, everything jonathan larson ever wrote tbh

26:A song that makes you want to fall in love: waterloo, but specifically the mamma mia here we go again version lol

27:A song that breaks your heart: tis the damn season by taylor swift. for literally no reason lmao

28:A song by an artist with a voice that you love: 29 by demi lovato!

29:A song that you remember from your childhood: sakura by 175R

30:A song that reminds you of yourself: could have been me by the struts

#asks #molly mumbles #mishavacado

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lunapaper · 2 years ago

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Album Review: 'Endless Summer Vacation' - Miley Cyrus

Miley Cyrus has gone through so many evolutions at this point that she’s practically a Pokemon.

We’ve had neon-soaked Bangerz Miley trying to twerk her way out of Disney hell, psychedelic Miley and her Dead Petz, country pop sweetheart Miley on Younger Now, classic rock Miley on Plastic Hearts… She doesn’t give us the best of both worlds; she gives us all the fuckin’ worlds!

So, I guess Endless Summer Vacation is Miley’s Solar Power? Not quite. This record doesn’t take itself anywhere near as seriously, but it’s not nearly as interesting, either.

Like most Miley albums, Endless Summer Vacation is a mishmash of sounds and ideas. Some of it works, most of it doesn’t. If anything, Cyrus spends most of her time cribbing from other artists.

Tracks like ‘Rose-Coloured Glasses’ and ‘Thousand Miles’ (not that one) recall the earthy 00s-style folk rock of Maggie Rogers, which is no coincidence since both tracks were produced by Kid Harpoon, who also produced Rogers’ latest record. ‘River’ capitalises on the bubbly disco pop already perfected by the likes of Cyrus’ one-time collaborator Dua Lipa. ‘Violet Chemistry’ is just something Taylor Swift already made a better version of on Midnights. Despite having a rather powerful team of writers and producers behind it (including James Blake), it’s nothing more than a bunch of chintzy synths on a loop.

So many people have called this their favourite track on Endless Summer Vacation, but I just don’t hear it. Why? Are the pickings really that slim here?

Well, kinda. So what does work?

‘Jaded’ is a swirling Tame Impala rip-off but at least it’s a good one, infused with some early 00s power ballad energy. ‘Handstand’ (co-written with Spring Breakers director Harmony Korine, of all people) is big, fat and glitchy with a bright neon glow, with Cyrus tapping back into her weirdo pop instincts as she recites some swampy beat poetry (‘In the sky, we could see the riders on the horseback/On comets, coming toward us, kicking up with laughter/My friend Big Twitchy rode the boat into the light/Surfed to the north break/We danced until there was nothing left/Just me and Twitchy/'Cause that's all we knew’). ‘You’ is a jazzy, sweeping, aching ballad dedicated to Cyrus’ boyfriend, producer Maxx Morando.

‘Muddy Feet,’ meanwhile, interpolates both Ella Washington’s 1969 track ‘Starving for Love’ and Christina Aguilera’s ‘Genie in a Bottle,’ and it works. It’s Miley at her best: Bold, raspy and ready to cut a bitch as she leans into the more bluesy tones in her voice. It’s enough to make Sia’s backing vocals feel like an afterthought.

And then there’s ‘Flowers,’ a sassy response to Bruno Mars’ ‘If I Was Your Man’ with a nice, breezy groove tailor-made for ice cold daydreams and sunny kiss-offs to your ex. There’s also a hint of Fleetwood Mac’s ‘Dreams’ in there, so Cyrus hasn’t totally shaken off the classic rock aesthetic of Plastic Hearts. It’s grown on me with subsequent listens, but it’s still sort of wild that this song, so glossy and unassuming on the surface, has managed to score a massive 96m streams on Spotify.

But by the time we reach the final trifecta of tracks - ‘Wildcard,’ the balmy ‘Island’ and the schmaltzy ‘Wonder Woman’ – the momentum wanes, and you begin to forget the powerful high that ‘Muddy Feet’ left you with in the first place. The ‘Flowers’ demo that bookends the record isn’t really anything more than filler tacked on to milk the track’s success, though the more stripped-backed feel does give it a bit of a smoky flavour.

While looking at Stereogum’s coverage of Endless Summer Vacation, I saw an interesting theory posted in the comments section by a delightful chap/chappette going by the name of Econoline Van Fleet. ‘Not only is it obviously dog shit,’ they wrote, ‘but Cyrus is savvy and talented enough to know that it’s obviously dog shit. I suppose one could make the argument that her awareness of this fact is some kind of subversive performance art (“She knows that we know she knows!”), but that rationalization is itself a huge pile of steaming dog shit. This is the soundtrack of an artistically bankrupt empire in decline. The barrage of dog shit is every bit as predictable and boring as the decline itself.’

It’s not a bad theory, but is Miley really that self-aware?

As an artist, Cyrus seemingly suffers from a sort of identity crisis, always doing a hard reset on each subsequent era. The same also applies to Endless Summer Vacation: There’s no common thread between these songs, the tracklisting almost an afterthought. There’s a couple of empowerment anthems sprinkled here, a power ballad there, the weirdo pop track somewhere in the middle...

And despite the title, there’s not much to suggest that these songs are bright and summery in any way beyond 'Flowers,’ ‘Handstand’ and maybe ‘Violet Chemistry.’

Lyrical cliches are also rampant. Whether she’s pouring her heart out or sticking it to an ex-lover, Cyrus’ feelings are often vague and surface-level at best, leaving it to the tabloids and Genius cliff notes to fill in the rest. And it has an awful lot of writers behind it, too: ‘Muddy Feet’ alone has a whopping 11 while ‘Island’ - probably the most boring track on the entire album – has seven.

Endless Summer Vacation feels more like Cyrus making a cynical play for streaming numbers while still trying to atone for her more controversial eras. It’s all so painfully ‘safe’; I can't believe people actually like this. Y’all were just praising her for ripping off Stevie Nicks a couple of years ago...

Now 30 and newly divorced, it’s natural that the singer would display a little more growth, but blandness shouldn’t be mistaken for maturity. It’s a problem that’s plagued many a female artist before her: Being forced to file back the edges and tone things down in order to be taken ‘seriously,’ as if fun and lust and passion have a use-by date.

Cyrus' sharp shift into adult contemporary resembles that of P!nk in certain respects: A talented singer once known for rocking out now churning out bland, radio-friendly dance pop. I'm not much older than Miley, but even I’ve got no patience for this crap.

Endless Summer Vacation isn’t the long, breezy getaway most were probably hoping for. Rather, it lands right in the middle of the road, just idling there until Miley decides on what sharp turn she’s gonna make next...

- Bianca B.

#music #miley cyrus #endless summer afternoon #new #reviews #albums #Bianca B

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rhizomehaunt · 2 years ago

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eeee thanks @yellghoul ily ˙ᵕ˙

1. picrew game

my hair is getting dangerously mullet-ish in the back (but not in the good kind of way) as I'm growing it out but this is pretty close. I live in soft and oversized clothes and especially a big black hoodie my girlfriend got from working on the set of POWER BOOK II: GHOST.

2. shuffle my on repeat playlist and post the first 10 tracks

1/ Too Close, Sir Chloe

2/ Flowers (Demo), Miley Cyrus

3/ Tisched Off, Bartees Strange

4/ Freakin’ Out on the Interstate, Briston Maroney

5/ To be honest, Christine and the Queens

6/ la chute (piano), Jean-Michel Blais

7/ Rät, Penelope Scott

8/ A Place To Lie, Art School Girlfriend

9/ Younger & Dumber, Indigo De Souza

10/ After The Earthquake, Alvvays

Honestly not a terrible overview of my listening habits, but there's definitely more classical that didn't make the cut asjsfhsfj.

3. this questionnaire:

Tea, coffee, or soda?

Coffee, black, several cups a day.

Dogs or cats?

cats always and forever <3

Can you play any instrument?

I haven't played piano in years but am hoping to get a keyboard and start again! I'm shit at sight reading but used to be good at chords and playing by ear.

What's your sun sign?

gemini (chaos)

First song lyrics that pops into your head?

And you got a lot on your mind / And your heart, it looks just like mine / There's no use in wasting your time, anymore

Do you have any tattoos?

I have three and want many more. a tattoo of a drawing I did of the chair in my grandpa's studio on my wrist, an ambiguous flower and two hands clasped by it on my upper arm, and then a big warped text piece wrapped around my entire right thigh reading the sweeteness of you carrying yesterdays feelings to tomorrow beyond what i knew before

Favorite place you've travelled?

Paris, because I took myself there for three weeks as I was breaking up with a terrible ex, amid a complete collapse of everything, and it was the first time I left the country, first time in my entire life I wasn't scraping by, and I did it alone, on my own, and just read and walked the entire time. I became friends with the local orange seller by the apartment I stayed, got asked out at the Louvre by a chef from Argentina while I drew an old man who was drawing a painting who I later spoke to in broken French (and he clasped my hand and cheered me on), made a friend at a bookstore who was writing her masters thesis on the same author I wrote my undergrad thesis on and we ended up having lunch and she gave me some of her old books, and also started talking with another solo traveler from South Korea who's a brilliant artist and musician at Musée de l'Orangerie and we wandered around and then met up for lunch the next day and are still in touch.

What's the last movie you've watched?

The Muse

What languages do you speak?

English and some very poor French

Do you have any hobbies?

I suppose baking?? It’s hard to distinguish what’s a hobby and what’s routine. I don’t really think of anything I do as a hobby any more, but that’s probably bc I’m always trying to do a million things.

You can hang out with one fictional character for an hour, who do you choose?

Camilla Hect, beloved.

these are always so fun, i'm tagging @zuko and @baezel2<3

#tag game #i look more tired irl

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bellascarousel · 2 years ago

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🦅🌞🎶 — for the ask game!

🦅 I'm kind of somewhere in the middle. And it varies from fic to fic, as well. Though, for most of them I have at least a general idea of where it's going. And I also have a ridiculous tendency to write random scenes I'm nowhere near ready for. Almost all of my Scrivener projects have a folder called "future scenes". But, while I usually have like "mile narkers" that I'm writing towards, I don't always have a clear idea of how to get there. Probably the most actually planned out is Let's Run Away Together. I pretty much know exactly what I'm doing for the rest of it, to the point that I'm actually seriously considering entering a total number of chapters and getting rid of the question mark.

🌞 My work schedule is kind of erratic. Some days I work 6am to 2pm, and others I work 1pm to 9pm. So, the time of day I write fluctuates along with it. Early work days, I write in the late afternoon, after work. While on late days, I write in the morning, before work. That said, I PREFER to write in the mornings, simply because most days I'm mentally fried after work and can have a hard time getting up the energy to write.

🎶 The only time I am not listening to music is when I'm in my car. I can't even SLEEP in silence. But, as for specifically listening while writing, definitely. Music is great for helping me set the mood. Some examples: I wrote the first chapter of Ruined to Damn by LeAnn Rimes. Don't Leave was written to When I Look At You by Miley Cyrus. Obviously the first chapter of The Art Of Matchmaking was written to Home Alone Tonight by Luke Bryan. I wrote the chapter of The Doctor Who Loved Me called "Spontaneous Combustion" to Love Thy Will Be Done by Martika. Other songs from my Kathony pkaylist that I've been known to put on repeat for days at a time, and therefore have definitely written to just by default are I Wanna Know What Love Is by Foreigner, Give Your Heart A Break by Demi Lovato, and All I Need by Jack Wagner (which is going to be the song used for my first fanvid, once I finish separating out scenes. I'm probably about a 3rd of the way finished with it.)

These were probably all way more detailed and... verbose than you were expecting. I'm sorry. I can be a wordy bitch, sometimes...

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newmusicradionetwork · 8 months ago

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Buck Johnson Releases His Worldwide Hit “Just Feel Better”

Renowned singer-songwriter, multi-instrumentalist, and music producer Buck Johnson, co-wrote the hit single “Just Feel Better” with Jamie Houston (Miley Cyrus, Sheryl Crow, and Kid Rock) and Damon Johnson (guitarist and lead singer for Brother Cane, having three No. 1 rock radio singles, including “And Fools Shine On, as well as touring with Alice Cooper, Thin Lizzy, and Lynyrd Skynyrd). Buck now releases his own compelling rendition of the 2005 worldwide phenomenon, which was a song from the dynamic collaboration between Carlos Santana and Steven Tyler on the acclaimed album All That I Am. Buck, known for his role as the keyboardist and backing vocalist for the legendary rock band Aerosmith, the Hollywood Vampires (Johnny Depp, Alice Cooper, Joe Perry, and Tommy Henriksen), and The Joe Perry Project, is not only continuing his journey as a soulful rock artist but is also stepping into the spotlight as a sought-after producer for fellow musicians. In moments of seeking solace and healing, the instinct to externalize our efforts is a common first step. “Just Feel Better” challenges conventional thinking, urging listeners to redirect their focus inward for true emotional restoration. Encouraging a transformative shift, the song advocates confronting inner pain, discovering one’s unique key to healing, and unlocking the potential for personal growth and resilience. “Buck Johnson came in out of the blue and purely by chance to our Aerosmith family, and we feel we really won the lottery. Big. Turns out he’s much, much more than just a guy to sing harmony with. He plays slammin’ guitar and is out of this world on anything keys. He’s a true all-around talent, a huge asset to me and Aerosmith and also a great human being and friend.” — Steven Tyler Santana also taps some rock heroes on the new disc, with Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler contributing vocals to “Just Feel Better,” while Metallica guitarist Kirk Hammett appears with pedal steel phenom Robert Randolph on the instrumental track “Trinity.” — Billboard “This poignant track revolves around the theme of finding solace, hope, and comfort in the face of adversity. It is a reminder that in the darkest moments, there is always a glimmer of light and a chance for redemption. Just Feel Better urges individuals to embrace their struggles, process their pain, and move forward with renewed strength. It serves as a guiding anthem, encouraging listeners to persevere through life’s challenges and empower themselves to heal and grow.” — Anna Hawkins, Old Time Music “Just Feel Better” encapsulated the poignant narrative of seclusion and post-traumatic stress within an overwhelmingly challenging situation, revolving around the theme of seeking reassurance, serenity, and encouragement. Buck expresses, “This song tells the story of someone who’s spent a lifetime suffering from trauma that caused her to lose her way, and she would do anything to just feel better.” Drawing inspiration from the real-life struggles from a close friend, Buck channels the profound feelings of hopelessness into the song. Serving as the narrator, Buck commences the lyrical journey with the impactful line, “She said I feel stranded, and I can’t tell anymore if I’m coming or I’m going.” In the chorus, she calls out for help. “Tell me what to do. You know I just can’t see through this haze around me, and I’ll do anything to just feel better.” In the second verse, she said, “I need you to hold me. I’m a little far from the shore, and I’m afraid of sinking.” Penned by Buck and his two close friends, the songwriting prowess behind “Just Feel Better” extends to accomplished individuals with remarkable achievements in the industry. Jamie Houston, one of Buck’s collaborators, credits include chart-topping hits, multi-platinum albums, and Emmy nominations. Notably, Jamie holds the record for the biggest single one-week jump in chart position in the history of the Billboard Hot 100 Chart with the song “Breaking Free,” featured on the album High School Musical. Damon Johnson, the other collaborator, has songwriter credits with Sammy Hagar and Stevie Nicks. The songwriting process of “Just Feel Better” was an experience that accurately described the inescapable feelings of isolation and depression. It highlights the necessity of going beyond surface-level connections and truly reaching out to those in our midst, understanding that even those closest to us may be contending with internal challenges. Buck says, “It was very personal and emotional to us when we wrote it. We didn’t write the song with any intention of trying to make it a hit. It was about telling her story, and so it sort of wrote itself and was therapeutic to write it.” Buck’s unique interpretation injects new vitality into the track, complemented by a visually arresting music video produced by Dead Horse Branding. The video, a collaborative effort directed by Art Director and Co-Founder Rick Caballo, with Brittany Hambrick as the Assistant Director, captures the essence of the emotionally charged rock sound that defines Buck’s musical journey. As an artist, Buck’s powerful words in the song serve as an anthem for those who feel like they are barely hanging on, offering comfort in knowing that they are not alone. “Unfortunately, this story is a common one for a lot of people who’ve suffered, felt lost, and continue to do so. I hope the song can be emotionally cathartic to those who feel this way and are seeking help, says Buck.” Having shared the stage with various notable acts, Buck continues to expand his songwriting and musicianship, leaving an indelible mark on the music scene. His self-produced album, mixed by Chad Carlson (Taylor Swift, Blues Traveler, Chris Isaak, and Trisha Yearwood), is set to launch later this year, further solidifying his place as a soulful rock artist and producer. STREAM HERE MUSIC VIDEO LINK For more information and to connect with Buck Johnson, follow him on Website, Instagram, Facebook, and Spotify. About Buck Johnson Singer-songwriter, multi-instrumentalist, and music producer Buck Johnson is the keyboardist and backing vocalist for the legendary rock band Aerosmith, the Hollywood Vampires (Johnny Depp, Alice Cooper, and Joe Perry), and The Joe Perry Project. Buck hails from the backroads of Shady Grove, Alabama, just outside Birmingham, where he grew up singing gospel throughout the South with his musical family. Since beginning his career, the soulful rock artist has amplified his musical talent by performing in churches, bars, festivals, and concert halls globally alongside icons like Aerosmith, Johnny Depp and Alice Cooper. As a songwriter, Buck co-wrote the international hit single for Carlos Santana, “Just Feel Better,” for his 2005 album All That I Am, featuring Steven Tyler. After moving to Nashville in 2006, Buck joined the country rock band Whiskey Falls, releasing their self-titled album in 2007 and earning two Country Top 40 hit singles, “Last Train Running” and “Falling Into You.” Buck credits his Alabama roots and his many years of living in California for his soulful rock Cala-Bama sound. Buck has also had numerous songs featured on television and in films as a songwriter, composer, producer, and performer, including the song “You Came Along” featuring Billy Ray Cyrus on vocals for the Lifetime movie Flying By, “Working Man” by Whiskey Falls for the ABC TV show Extreme Makeover-Home Edition, and “Fast Talking Lover” by Whiskey Falls for the ABC TV show Nashville. Continuing to expand his songwriting and musicianship, Buck produced and co-wrote Kaitlyn Kohler’s single “I’m Not Crying,” which recently went No. 1 at Texas Country radio. Buck has also recorded and/or toured with such notable acts as The Doobie Brothers (“Rockin’ Down The Highway” live album), Tal Bachman (hit single “She’s So High”), Jon McLaughlan (hit single “Beautiful Disaster”), John Waite, Chris Stills, Timothy B. Schmit (The Eagles), and more. He has also worked as a songwriting collaborator, session vocalist, and musician with songwriters and producers Jamie Houston (High School Musical, Carlos Santana), Charlie Midnight (The Doobie Brothers), and Bob Rock (Tal Bachman). Buck’s latest works feature various iconic artists, including his self-produced rock ‘n’ roll album, mixed by Chad Carlson (Taylor Swift, Blues Traveler, Chris Isaak, Trisha Yearwood); engineered by Tim Brennan (Steven Tyler, Chris Daughtry, Jason Mraz); Nick Buda on drums (Taylor Swift, Dolly Parton, Kenny Chesney); on guitar Rob McNelley (Jelly Roll, Keith Urban, Carrie Underwood); Luis Maldonado (Train, Foreigner); and Geoff Pearlman (Linda Perry, Rikki Lee Jones, Jakob Dylan); and Ted Pecchio on bass (Doyle Bramhall II, Derek Trucks Band). The album features notable lead guitarists Damon Johnson (Lynyrd Skynyrd), Peter Stroud (Sheryl Crow), and the songwriting team of Buck and Charlie Midnight (James Brown, Joe Cocker, and Joni Mitchell). As a versatile entertainer, Buck’s artistry encompasses American rock ‘n’ roll with a unique soulful flare that comes from his gospel roots, creating a sound and style of his own. Read the full article

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ednaodfsw2024 · 9 months ago

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Everyday Bravery in Resilience

Module 8: Music

My selected playlist has its theme, "everyday bravery in resilience." The concept that unites the songs combines their titles, lyrics, and subjects. I chose this theme because it relates to how resilience and adaptation to adversity help people overcome obstacles and move on. The song's message reminds me of my capacity to bear pain, bounce back, flourish in adversity, and endure over time. The topic reminds me to stay calm. I can overcome obstacles by utilizing my assets and network of support.

The songs in my playlist and links are:

(1) "American Soldier" by Toby Keith (country). https://youtu.be/DWrMeBR8W-c?si=QKd1EII4o9ycd2jG

(2) "That's Life" by Frank Sinatra (jazz-pop) https://youtu.be/avU2aarQUiU?si=sQJumKqvdzwu3DqZ;

(3) "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus (country pop). https://youtu.be/NG2zyeVRcbs?si=ik2ovIQe7AeAElfH

(4) "Ninth Symphony -Ode of Joy" by Beethoven (classical version). https://youtu.be/uooe16ILaPo?si=vKzGokAsvTNYIrbD.;

(5) "Pressing On" by Chicago Mass Choir (blues) https://youtu.be/Se4YBi07cWw?si=LZFYQ9TsR5j26nLN;

(6) "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey (rock) https://youtu.be/VcjzHMhBtf0?si=thkVUP6MBNTJ9DJX.

"American Soldier "by Toby Keith (country)

Toby Keith is an American country music musician who co-wrote and released the song "American Soldier. Keith and Chuck Cannon co-wrote the tune. The song was released in November 2003. On the Billboard U.S. Hot Country Songs chart, it shot to the top and remained there for four weeks. Toby Keith passed away lately following a battle with stomach cancer.

A sad guitar melody opens the song, setting the stage for an intensely personal and poignant homage. The composition's vocal, piano, and guitar accompaniment spans the voice range. The song's consonance highlights the repetition of some sounds, such as "soldiers," "support," and "service." The music arouses feelings and imparts a sense of steadiness and strength. The song's overall effect is derived from its rhythm and arrangement. The music has a soft yet strong melody that goes well with the poignant lyrics.

The song's tempo is 82 beats per minute (BPM). Melody-forming instruments include a piano and a guitar. The vocal line has a narrative pattern that reflects storytelling. The pitch ranges widely in this song, from high to low. The rhythm is stable due to its constant beat and quadruple meter, which is four beats every measure.

The song transports listeners to the heart and soul of a soldier's life while evoking solid feelings and telling a tale. The country ballad is a compelling song that mixes a straightforward melody with heartbreaking lyrics such as:

"And I will always do my duty no matter what the price.

I've counted up the cost. I know the sacrifice.

I will proudly take a stand when liberty's in jeopardy.

I will always do what's right.

I'm out here on the front lines"

The harmony is defined by a steady pace, soft piano notes, and acoustic guitar strumming. The arrangement lets the moving words shine through, bringing up feelings of sacrifice, loyalty, and love for one's nation.

I'm grateful to have served in the U.S. armed forces because of the song. After serving in the U.S. military, the song makes me feel thankful. The song gives me a great sense of fulfillment because I was a member of the U.S. military, deployed to Iraq, and am now a veteran. The song pays homage to the selfless devotion and sacrifices made by soldiers in the armed forces. Its style inspires pride in the country's ideals, culture, history, and sense of belonging. It honors the soldier's commitment to defending freedom and has a resolute, proud tone. It reflects the soldier's desire to achieve honor and happiness. Behind the uniform and helmets, there lies a heart and mind.

"That's Life" by Frank Sinatra (jazz-pop)

This song, written originally by Dean Kay and Kelly Gordon, was performed by Frank Sinatra and released in his 1966 album "That's Life." Frank Sinatra's rendition is the most well-known. This genre features a strong rhythm emphasizing every measure's second and fourth beats and the joy of playing music together. Additionally, the solo showcases the skill of a virtuoso performer.

Instrument blending affects the sounds, giving them a symbolic color. Typically, the rhythm section consisted of the piano, guitar, and bass. The horns, trumpet, clarinet, and trombone performed most of the melodic material, providing intricate harmonic accompaniment for the soloist. It has a different tone color as the ensemble plays identical notes due to the instrument's placement and tonal characteristics.

The song starts with a sad line that accepts the highs and lows of life. It establishes the tone for the message of resiliency. G Major is the key in which "That's Life" is written. Consonance is used to create melody and rhythm. The term describes the near repeating of consonant sounds such as "tune," "June," "face," "race," "try," "fly," "king," and "thing" at the end of verses. The lines gain a melodic aspect from these repeated consonants, highlighting the highs and lows of life.

Line 1 establishes the tone for the message and gives "That's Life" more nuance and emotional weight. The middle section of a song, commonly known as the bridge or middle, often shows a contrast. The song's chorus serves as its central theme. Listening to the lyrics of this song and the meaning behind them can be uplifting.

"That's life (that's life)

That's what all the people say

You're riding high in April, shot down in May

But I know I'm going to change that tune

When I'm back on top, back on top in June."

The song reiterates a gentle reminder that although life has many ups and downs, people may eventually overcome hardship. Its lyrics deliver a powerful message of overcoming obstacles and setbacks.

"Each time I find myself flat on my face

I pick myself up and get back in the race.

I said that's life

And as funny as it may seem

Some people get their kicks stomping on a dream

But I don't let it, let it get me down

'Cause this fine old world, it keeps spinnin' around"

The song encourages perseverance through life's obstacles. It is a timeless anthem that speaks to many people and embodies the spirit of resolve.

The Climb Miley Cyrus (country pop)

Miley Cyrus recorded a song called "The Climb" that expresses the difficulties she and everyone else encounter. When she released "The Climb" in early 2009, she achieved the best of both worlds—the power ballad with its sad, country-influenced music and ambitious lyrics. "The Climb is a country pop power ballad combining pop and soft rock elements. Cyrus appeals to a range of emotions in her listeners throughout the song. Her use of passion in her words enables her listeners to connect to the song.

The musical aspect has an accelerando rhythm and a beat in quadruple meters. The dynamics exhibit a crescendo dynamic as they progressively increase in volume. The standard time tempo of "The Climb" is 80 beats per minute. Cyrus's vocal range is one and a half octaves. Nonetheless, the song kicks into high gear when a "sudden, spiky burst of violins" appears. Both the song's title and lyrics relate life to a mountain. This metaphor has the effect of facilitating the listener's relationship to the song. The song has a power ballad vibe, portraying life as a challenging yet worthwhile adventure. The use of consonance in "The Climb" combines attractive sounds.

"The struggles I'm facing

The chances I'm taking

Sometimes, it might knock me down, but

No, I'm not breaking"

Miley used a ray of sunshine as the song's closing picture and line to illustrate her argument when she reached the mountain's summit. Cyrus states, "It's all about the climb, that's all." Baby, don't waver in your faith at all. The song's lyrics are straightforward, concise, and to the point—life is about the journey, not the sprint to the top.

"There's always gonna be another mountain

I'm always gonna wanna make it move

Always gonna be an uphill battle

Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there

Ain't about what's waiting on the other side

It's the climb."

The song reminds us that life isn't only about what you accomplish; it's also about the Journey you take to get there, and it's vital to reflect on and value the experiences you have along the way. The song symbolizes life's challenges and recurring conflicts with the picture of a mountain and climbing. The song emphasizes the importance of having persistence and confidence in oneself.

Ninth Symphony "Ode of Joy" by Beethoven (classical)

Ludwig van Beethoven's Ninth Symphony, sometimes called the Choral Symphony, is a massive composition ending with the well-known "Ode to Joy." Taken from the 1785 poem "An Die Freude" (Ode to Joy) by Friedrich Schiller. Beethoven's arrangement included a few new passages. Incredibly, Beethoven wrote some of his best pieces after losing his hearing. This music is still regarded as one of his greatest works.

The catchy tune from "Ode to Joy" is unmistakable and has come to represent harmony and hope. Beethoven's mastery resides in combining these movements to create a symphony that reaches the spirit of humanity and transcends time. The opening section, or refrain, develops a rondo melody in Beethoven's ninth symphony. The repeated refrain follows an episode with a different melody. The movement opens with a robust and dramatic theme, followed by clash passages. It establishes the mood for the symphony, which takes the sonata style. In terms of dynamics, tempos, timbres, harmonies, and melodies, the middle movement or movements typically contrast with the first and last movements.

The theme of a composition is a melody that undergoes variations throughout the piece. The Ninth Symphony starts with a fast movement, often called allegro, in the primary key. This is usually followed by a slow movement in a related or contrasting key, typically called andante. The slow rhythm evokes a lovely, poignant movement with profound emotional resonance and poetic melodies. The third movement, traditionally called presto, has bright speed, and the final movement, molto allegro, resolves everything that has come before it, sometimes with some contrasting slow sections within it.

Imagine Beethoven penning all the notes from memory, unable to hear the music he created. He persevered in leading the ninth symphony in concert despite this enormous obstacle. You can listen to the effort, the will to succeed, and the unwavering spirit that characterizes perseverance throughout Beethoven's ninth symphony. It is evidence that we should never give up, especially in the face of seemingly overwhelming challenges. Beethoven's legacy serves as a reminder that real greatness comes from having the unshakeable will to endure hardship in addition to brilliance.

"Pressing On" by Chicago Mass Choir with Regina McCrary (blues)

The gospel song "Pressing On" by the Chicago Mass Choir is a potent hymn that discusses the challenges one may encounter in one's spiritual path. It was written and performed originally by American singer-songwriter Bob Dylan and included as the sixth track on his 1980 album. In "Pressing On," Dylan communicates emotion by acknowledging his continued weaknesses but vowing to keep striving to be godly.

African American communities in the South gave birth to the blues. The artist admits that many attempts to dissuade them, doubt their religious ideas, and seek evidence to support them. This is an exceptional chance to experience the power of their rhythm and be affected by the beauty of their vocals.

Well, I'm pressing on

To the higher calling of my Lord.

Many try to stop me, shake me up in my mind,

Say, "Prove to me that He is Lord; show me a sign."

What kind of sign do they need when it all comes from within,

When what's lost has been found, what's to come has already been?

The song's upbeat pace conceals its menacing theme, revealed by the groaning falsetto vocal. Inventively set up, the female vocalists, drums, organ, bass, and guitar gradually follow the lonesome, driving piano. Naturally, the framework isn't all that unique, but it becomes captivating when the melody is good. The song encompasses a variety of emotions, even though the music itself never suggests melancholy or hopelessness. Instead, it conveyed a sentimental attitude, both in the song lyrics and the blue notes of the scale.

The singer declares at the song's beginning that they will not let anything stop them from moving on and pursuing their Lord's greater calling. I believe in a higher calling. "Pressing On" encourages me to maintain my faith despite hardship. The hymn encourages listeners that although obstacles and temptations will inevitably arise, we can overcome them if we keep moving toward the Lord's higher calling.

Don't Stop Believing by Journey (rock)

"Don't Stop Believin" is a rock song by the American band Journey. It was released in October 1981. A ballad full of optimism, the song's theme is to never give up on your goals and to remember that life will continue no matter what. The song conveys the strong message not to lose. Listeners will sense a feeling of uplifting as it comes to its end.

“Don't Stop Believin” is a song by Journey with a tempo of 118 BPM. Another way to characterize the song is as timeless, with a stop-go vibe that keeps the tension and build-up going. The use of the piano sets a single tone with distinct frequency. The song is characterized by amplified instruments and a solid back rhythm (with particular emphasis on beats two and four) throughout the song. The rhymed lyrics are typically countercultural, personal, and political. The first prelude is agitatedly melodic. The third piece is jovial, the second is mournful, and the latter is stormy, explosive, peaceful, and expressive. Each prelude exhibits a distinct "feeling," which we may or may not characterize as vibrant or evoke an emotional reaction.

The song uses traditional storytelling techniques—personal tales, interesting facts, and illustrative analogies—to help us become more resilient. As the title suggests, "Don't Stop Believin" urges listeners to be cheerful despite uncertainty. It's about clinging to hope and faith that things will improve despite all obstacles. The song transforms commonplace events into grandiose dimensions. It highlights the tenacity of ordinary people, highlighting the importance of their challenges and the need for them to keep moving forward. It's an appeal to persevere under trying conditions.

In summary, the degree of stylistic relevance and the music's general structure require listeners to focus on a piece's details, form, and structure when analyzing music. The analysis involves examining parts or phenomena along these lines. I feel a strong emotional connection to these songs in the playlist. These songs span several genres and have a knack for expressing emotions that words can't quite express. The unadulterated form of music inspires listeners to comprehend the various genres, styles, and compositional techniques.

Daily acts of bravery and resilience are vital in helping individuals navigate life's obstacles with success. Everyday bravery in resilience exemplifies an "American Soldier" being prepared to sacrifice their life to save others. The song "That's Life" encourages people to keep going when things get complicated. "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus describes a worthy journey in life where we must conquer our obstacles. The "Ode of Joy" from the Ninth Symphony serves as a reminder that true greatness is found in the steadfast will to overcome hardship. "Pressing On" affirms that faith has a greater calling despite adversity. The song "Don't Stop Believing" promotes optimism in the face of obstacles in daily life. As one perseveres, resilience grows over time.

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roomsofangel · 11 months ago

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. . . RIGHT HERE .ᐟ

song mingi | written by roomsofangel

access the full masterlist here!

pairing ex!mingi x afab!reader

genre(s) exes to fwb. toxic relationship. smut smut smut. angst angst angst. musician!mingi

word count 7.6k

warnings a lot of mentions of drugs, mingi is always high. communication? they never heard of it. overall a very toxic relationship but neither can stay away. explicit language. a lot of fighting overall. mingi breaks a glass during an argument.

smut warnings unprotected sex (don’t do this, i’ll smack you with my chancla). dirty talk bc mingi is filthy. VOICE KINK. oral (male receiving) fingering. mingi has a big dick… creampie. choking. dom!mingi. switch!reader. mingi lives for degrading and praising. mingi calls reader (slut, whore, baby, doll, etc)

synopsis you had swore this time was it. you and mingi? done, for good. the weeks had passed without any sign of him and you began to feel as if you had finally done it… until he shows up at your doorstep after blowing up your phone, high and promising to be better

you knew he was bad for you, but you couldn’t help but not let the past go.

a/n i won’t even lie i have never written this many words before— and it’s been a while since i wrote smut so i hope this does some justice </3 i may be a little rusty and hopefully can be as detailed as i used to be eventually (send help my writing talent is rusting)

songs i listened to (if you want the phoebe experience) drive you insane by daniel di angelo, right here by chase atlantic, i never existed by chase atlantic, who owns my heart by miley cyrus, toxic valentine by all time low, flawless by the neighbourhood, don’t blame me by taylor swift, w.d.y.w.f.m by the neighbourhood, i’m yours by isabel larosa and under pressure by chase atlantic!

song mingi was a name that both tasted like bad liquor and sweet cotton candy on your tongue, enough for it to either make you want to run to the nearest exit or have shivers run down your spine with desire. it’s been longer than you could count on two hands, and you weren’t sure if you and mingi were happy during most of it but part of you wanted to stay in the delusion that you were. you had to have been, there had to be something that is still making you cling to him as if he’s your saving grace.

it wasn’t until the third year of the whirlwind the two of you called a relationship started to show its cracks, how broken it truly was. early may, late april — you stood in front of mingi, his legs spread and head titled back into the couches’ soft cushions, his chest rising up and down agonizingly slow. you called his name about five times, even threw a pillow his way and now it only mocked you by his feet. why the fuck was he doing this again? was he sick?

“mingi?” you called out for the sixth time, only this time you finally got somewhat of a reaction when you heard your boyfriend of three years groan, dragging out a whine. his hand lifted to cover his eyes, another muffled groan into his palm, “mingi!”

it was as if he was gathering the strength to even say something, his arm muscles tensing and normally you would have been drooling at the sight if it weren’t for this circumstance, begging your own lover to acknowledge you. “jesus christ, yn..” his low voice finally making itself known, your hands resting on your hips, waiting to see if he was going to follow up with something. he never did — “is that all?” you scoffed, moving your arms up to fold over your chest. “is that all you’re going to say to me?”

mingi moved his hand out of his face to shift his body up more, his gaze lowering to look at you. “yn, baby, i’m tired.” his brows pinched together, a light pout on his lips, “can we do this tomorrow?”

you looked at him for a moment, blinking a few times as if doing so would process what the fuck he just said to you, “how long are you going to be tired?” your tone showing how annoyed you were, “for the last two weeks, you’ve been in this exact position talking about how tired you are, mingi!” hands rising up, appearing animated as you scolded him

“god, yn!” mingi let out a frustrated sigh, lifting himself off the couch in a haste, he towered over you with a scowl. “can a fucking guy have one good high in peace?” he muttered, shoving his way past you, his shoulder harshly bumping against yours and you glanced behind you to watch him stomp into your shared bedroom, flinching at the door slamming shut.

you didn’t know what you wanted to do at that moment. unsure if you wanted to cry or scream, maybe even both. you were at complete loss for words, not realizing you had already had tears streaming down your cheeks, using your hands to wipe them before taking a seat on the couch. it wasn’t always going to be like this, you were sure of it. maybe mingi just needed some space, and you could have been less on his ass.. yeah.. that’s it..

if only, years later, you could tell the past version of yourself

it only got worse

after two more years, you and mingi officially broke up. you blocked his number and left without a single word, and last you checked it was as if you never existed to him either. constant social media posts of his newer antics and girls on his arm, god, he was someone else. this wasn’t the mingi you fell for and it was as if you were staring at someone unrecognizable

he looked like mingi, talked like him. shared his name, and shit, even fucked like him. but it was not your mingi.

and part of you should have known that, part of you should have known that the old mingi was long gone. and while you curled your hair, you stared at your reflection — you wore the skintight black dress mingi always said he loved but always said it looked even better on the floor and the gold necklace that he got you for your one year anniversary.

it was nauseating, staring at yourself with what seemed to be damn mingi merchandise. he still owned you and had you wrapped around his finger despite no longer physically being there, “fucking bullshit..” you muttered, finishing your hair and unplugging the hot iron

“damn, i just walked in!” wooyoung exclaimed with a laugh, setting down his bag onto the hotel mattress the two of you were getting ready in. you glanced behind you with an apologetic smile, “sorry, i didn’t realize you were back,” you ran your fingers through your hair, messing around with it to hopefully find a suitable style for tonight while watching wooyoung skim through shirts to wear, moving around back and forth to the mirror holding it over his chest to envision it on his body. “i would have been back sooner but got held up.” he sighed, his head titling to where his phone was resting

you hummed in acknowledgment, “boyfriend troubles?” which only sounded ironic coming from you, but wooyoung nodded. “men aren’t shit, i’m telling you now.” he looked at you through the mirror, a deadpanned expression which only made you laugh softly, fixing the heels you were putting on, balancing yourself with a flat palm on the wall, “you’re a man, wooyoung.” you looked back at him through the reflection

he laughed in response, shaking his head, “i don’t count! i’m obviously part unicorn or something,” he shrugged, looking down as he spoke, rummaging through his things before turning his body slightly to look behind him where you resided, “can i borrow your eyeshadow palette?”

“yeah, it’s in my car,” you stood up, moving to grab your keys while wooyoung praised you, “what would i ever do without you!” he exclaimed with a big smile that you responded to with a laugh and excusing yourself out of the room and down the hall

you were definitely glad wooyoung got a room on the first floor, not wanting have to walk so much already in the heels you were in and be in a funk before you even got a chance to have fun. stepping outside, it was a bit cold, the cool breeze hugging your body while you looked for your car that you both planned on taking instead of wooyoungs.

it was just supposed to be a quick trip and back, unlocking your car door to lean in and grab the palette that was tucked into the glove compartment. “i just need to get him the same one at this point,” you laughed softly, mainly talking to yourself while you held the makeup product in your hands and shut your door, gasping and cursing outloud only seeing that someone stood behind it. “fuck!” you shrieked, aiming the edge of the palette towards the stranger

“ow! fuck! i didn’t think you were going to hit me!”

that voice.

oh god, that voice.

“mingi?” your mouth felt dry, looking more to confirm your suspicions and saw your recent ex, clutching his forehead with a pained expression, glancing towards you with an obvious expression. “yeah, who else?” he winced due to his movements, moving his hand away and leaning in towards you, you stumble back unintentionally.

“how bad is it?” he asked, and it wasn’t really too bad, in fact, he was just being as dramatic as you once knew him as.

past mingi.

maybe there was a little bit of him still there, “you’re just a big baby, it didn’t even leave a mark,” you amused and clicked your keys to lock your car and prepared to walk back to your room where wooyoung waited

“maybe i need an icepack.” he looked at you with a specific expression that you would later grow accustomed to, something you would see more than when mingi would tell you he loved you. pressing your lips together, you watched him eye your entire appearance up and down, “wooyoung is waiting for me.” wanting to let him know you weren’t alone and he only shrugged

“the more the merrier,” he teased with a grin, and you hated that your stomach did flips.

lightly shoving him, you laughed, “come on then, let’s get that icepack.”

taking you by the hand, and by surprise mingi already began pulling you back into the hotel’s direction, asking you which room it was without a sign of stopping or slowing down until the two of you found yourselves at the door. catching your breath, you took out your room key card from your bra, kneeling slightly to insert it. before you could finish the action, your breath hitched at feeling two large hands on your hips, “you look gorgeous by the way..” mingi’s voice octaves lower than before, god, you felt dizzy. “did you wear this for me?”

gulping, you lifted yourself to turn around and face him, “don’t flatter yourself.” you attempted to bite back, goosebumps covering your skin while he praticially devoured you with his sight alone, getting close enough to push you up against the door, his right hand resting just above your head, his left trailing up and down your side, “then lie to me.” his lips were only inches from yours, each word he spoke made them lightly brush against yours but not enough to give you what you both began to crave. “what?” you softly croaked out

“lie to me and tell me what i want to hear,” he whispered, “tell me you wore this for me.”

letting out a shaky breath, your hand grabbed onto the collar of his shirt, pulling him closer to press your lips together fully, a soft groan melting into your mouth that he gave you. “i wore this for you..” you mumbled against his lips, his hands groping your ass

thinking back, now that it was all said and done — you should have known better when mingi told you to lie to him

at times, you knew you were an idiot and you had no problem admitting it out loud nor confirming it if the topic ever arose — you knew full heartedly, song mingi made you completely fucking stupid.

you began seeing him again, completely disregarding how many times the two of you snuck him into your room or each other into a private space simply because you missed each other, only to end things because he couldn’t hold a conversation due to how far gone he was. it seemed like a constant cycle but every time you swore you were done, the mingi you fell for always managed to make a cameo. why were you holding onto someone that was no longer there?

and just like any other times, you and mingi had told each other what you two had was over. for good. of course, he called your bluff and you called his before your stubbornness and his pride became the ruins of the two of you again — a door slam to show you were done and the car starting to show he was gone

except now, one phone call and you found yourself at his best friend yunho’s doorstep, nearly swallowed whole by the oversized hoodie you were in. two knocks and two doorbell rings before the door cracked open, a bedhead yunho peeking through before opening it enough for you to step inside, “did mingi invite you?” he asked, voice hoarse and you saw how his eyes slowly opened and closed, he must’ve just woke up

you took in the living area, noticing the changes after mingi moved in compared to when you two lived together and would stop by and visit, the home began to show just how much mingi made it just that. home. you shrugged, looking at yunho who lead you into the kitchen, “is it that obvious?” you mumbled, yunho humming while opening the refrigerator

“not to everyone, don’t worry,” he amused, sticking his arm out without looking up to give you a water that you thanked him for and took into your hands. “he should be back soon.” he added in, straightening his posture and closing the refrigerator door, cracking open the can of soda to get sips from

of course mingi invited you when he wasn’t home, that was typical now of him. you nodded once to yunho and his words, taking a few drinks of youe water and wiping your mouth, “i didn’t know you guys got back together.” yunho looked at the ceiling as if he was voicing his thoughts out loud and reminiscing. coughing at the suddenness, you cleared your throat, and held your chest, “who said that?” your voice cracked

yunho shrugged, as if it wasn’t a big deal as you were making it out to be and drank more of his soda, the can lightly pressed to his lips when he spoke, “i just assumed since you’ve been coming around again.”

glancing at the floor, you didn’t have much time to respond or even think of one after hearing the front door open and close, “yunho!” mingi called out, jogging into the kitchen with a bag before he seemed to have noticed your presence. why did his face drop for a moment? he invited you, he had to have expected for you to be here

“yn,” he acknowledged, and you only nodded in response before glancing at the bag. “whats in there?” you questioned as he brought it over to yunho who peeked inside before taking it out of mingi’s hands

“good ol’ oxy,” yunho hummed, shaking the bag slightly as if he had just won a goldfish at the carnival. you didn’t miss the hesitant expression that washed over mingi’s face for a moment or how he glanced to you a few times while you observed yunho and his kid at the candy store antics, “you do oxy?” you turn to mingi and he pressed his lips together, “since when?”

mingi shoved his hands in his pockets, shrugging, “about five years?” it came off as a question to another question, how he titled his head with his brows scrunched as if he was attempting to recall the exact date but it told you what you needed to know and connected more dots for you. five years he claimed? so, that’s what he was doing

scoffing, you shook your head and began to make your way out of the kitchen, cursing under your breath when feeling a grip on your arm pull you back slightly to stop you from leaving. “yn..” mingi’s voice was soft, you knew if you turned you’d see the same puppy eyes he always used to get what he wanted, and you squeezed yours shut. don’t turn around don’t turn around

you turned around, mingi’s eyes fixated on you while yunho had already began walking out of the room, mumbling how this wasnt his fault and not to drag him into it, his footsteps quieting with how much further he got and the door shutting upstairs eventually

“why didn’t you tell me?” you ripped your arm out of his grasp, folding both of them over your chest and waited for a response, only to see that his pupils were smaller, as if constricted and you wanted to laugh from how frustrated you were. you were truly going insane, and you watched how he shook his head and stumbled on his words, “i told you, i really did,” followed by more of the similar phrases

frowning, you could hear the slight slur that was getting more prominent at how much he began to spur out more excuses and reasonings to his actions, he was already high. “mingi..” you breathed out, exhaling all the air in your lungs and leaning against the wall, hands in your hair to lightly pull from the frustration, “are you high?”

like a deer in headlights, mingi’s head shot up at you, almost as if it was ridiculous for you to even ask such a thing, “no, i’m not..” he brushed it off, his eyes glued on you before he stumbled in a rush to get to you, hand reaching out for yours ans you pulled back. “you think i can’t tell?” you scoffed, jaw clenched

“well, since you’re so smart tell me then, what am i doing that shows i’m high?”

you could only stare at him for a moment, wondering how the hell did he go from being like a kicked puppy to now as if he was going to explode on you at any moment if you inhaled a certain way, god who was this? “mingi, whatever the fuck this is,” you motioned to him and around the room, “i want no fucking part of it.”

pushing yourself off the wall, you turned to get ready to leave, flinching at the sound of a glass breaking. swallowing, you turned to see mingi broke one of the glass cups that rested on the countertop, looking at the ground as if he couldn’t process he had just done so, “don’t leave me..” following with a voice crack and sniffle, he looked up at you and you didn’t know what to do

you were hurt, scared even. you had never seen him like this, and you found yourself taking steps back away from him rather than towards him like he wanted, “yn!” his voice got louder, your eyes squeezing shut before turning your back to face him. “don’t turn your back on me!” he wailed

and it wasn’t the right time, it was anything but the right time, but your anger and frustrations, all the heartache that you kept inside seemed to have been opened up with just those little words.

hastily turning, tears streaming down your cheeks, “i should have turned my back on you ages ago!” your voice echoed loudly, mingi looking at you with widened eyes that you mirrored shortly after realizing what you had just said, “then fucking go!” he yelled, kicking the cabinet in frustration

“nobody is forcing you to be here, yn!” he followed with another shout, the vein in his neck more prominent and you scoffed, “you want me gone? fine!” you returned the same loudness he gave to you, the same aggression, “its fucking done, mingi. this?” you motioned to the two of you, “fucking done.” you spat, turning to fully leave and finally doing so

all while hearing both sobs for you to come back and a string of curses behind you

and that leads you to present day, weeks after the incident, sitting at a coffeehouse with wooyoung and his new boyfriend san, who you used to know back then due to mingi. the two of you separated yourselves for the same reasons, except san watched him only get further into his addictions

the last you heard about mingi, he was climbing up into the music scene, talking about how he’s been staying sober despite his music claiming otherwise. “i’m having a party tonight,” wooyoung voiced, his head leaning on san’s shoulder while he looked at you. you messed with your straw, swirling it around your cup while you nodded along, “i’m assuming you want me to come?” you amused with a small smile and wooyoung nodded, “duh! i need my demon twin there,” he grinned

“you know i’ll always be there,” you smiled, leaning in to sip on your iced coffee. wooyoung cheered silently, kissing on san’s jawline with soft mumbles of how you were his best friend and deserved the world, you could only smile and share glances with san who played with wooyoung’s hair. your best friend had made it his mission to voice more often how much he appreciated you and you deserved better after you told him what happened with mingi

speaking of, wooyoung was definitely not happy and it took everything in your entire body to hold him back when he wanted to storm off to find the taller male for himself and give him a ‘piece of wooyoung pie’ whatever that meant, you didn’t even want to find out and wooyoung eventually calmed down enough.

this would be your first party without looking for an excuse to come up with to leave early to be with mingi, your features scrunched at the memories. since the entire blowout between you and him, he hadn’t made any sort of effort to get back into contact with you and for once, you were grateful. maybe this time was actually the final time and you actually did it, mingi was actually out of your life.

finishing up your coffee, you stand and grab your jacket, “i’ll see you around eight then?” you asked, wooyoung nodding in confirmation. “party starts at nine!” he reminded you, standing to lean over the table and give you a tight hug, mumbling another appreciation that you returned back. san followed after, giving you a hug and a be safe before the three of you all said goodbye fully and parted ways

and when you got home, you let out a breath you has no idea you were holding, sliding your jacket down your tired shoulders and tossed it aside, making your way into your bedroom to plug your phone in and leave it to charge while you showered. you wondered what you would wear, what type of vibe you wanted tonight. you had enough time, grabbing your matching set to change into when you got out so you could look for something to wear and not be naked while doing so. you blamed the situation of wooyoung stumbling in on you, completely bare while looking through potential outfits enough to embarrass you to do so, even when you knew you were alone

the shower was rushed, not wanting to completely use up all your time in the warm water that felt a little too good on your tensed up body, toweling your hair and getting back into your room. now, you had your options laid out in front of you.

you never wore red to a party, despite that being something silly to say and admit, maybe it was time you did so. did mingi like red? god, stop thinking about him. groaning, you rush back into the bathroom to grab your blow dryer, plugging it in and drying it just enough but still wanting a more damp look. “hmm.. good enough,” you shrugged, turning off fhe light and walking into your room, seeing your phone light up a few times

“jesus christ,” you muttered, noticing how many notifs you had from just first glance, making your way to pull it off the charger and scroll through to see if it was wooyoung or someone else. and of course, the universe seemed to not be on your side, your stomsch dropping at mingi’s name fully covering every inch of your screen.

baby

baby please

missed call (x4)

im calling you

please pick up your phone

baby just pick up your phone

missed call (x2)

before you could process what was even happening, you heard a few knocks on your front door, sounding frantic and you knew the timing between your ex’s sudden outburst and the knocks couldnt be just a coincidence. what if that was mingi? you didn’t want to think about it, throwing your phone onto your bed and pulling out your satin robe to throw on to cover yourself and go into the living room, “i’m coming!” you called out. maybe it was just bad timing and it was wooyoung or another friend, it had to have been.

preparing yourself, you took a few deep breaths before opening the door and there he stood. song mingi, eyes bloodshot and hands trembling. “yn!” he exclaimed, throwing himself towards you, enveloping you in a hug. cigarette smoke clung to his clothes melting into the cologne he always wore, “oh my god, baby don’t scare me like that..” he panted, petting your hair as you stood still, not knowing what to do with your head pressed against his chest while he moved to look at you, “why weren’t you answering me?”

was he serious? he couldn’t just show up like this after weeks of no contact, but you didn’t have the energy to fight and still needed to get ready. “i was showering, mingi.” you sighed, “just come in.”

you never hated yourself as much as you did right now, seeing how he went from frantic to smiling, walking into your home and looking around your living room while you shut the door behind him. with arms folded over your chest, you tilted your head, “why are you here?”

turning, mingi frowned, “i miss you.”

your heart clenched at his words, how they sounded genuine. glancing at the ground, you held onto your robe that you hugged more, covering more of your body in the process, “mingi, please—“

“no, yn,” he interrupted, “i promise i’ll be better.”

part of you wanted to believe him, and shit, a tiny fraction of you did. but you couldn’t risk it, not again, and you shook your head in response. “no, mingi, not this time.” attempting to brush him off and walk towards your room, mingi followed like a lost puppy, soft pleas leaving his mouth like a broken record. “yn, please, i’ll get clean.”

you scoffed, “you should do that for yourself.”

sighing, mingi sat on your bed, messing with the fabric of dresses you had sprawled out while you eyed him, “you can’t stay here long, i’m leaving.” wanting to stand your ground, and you were proud your voice didn’t waver and shook, the false confidence becoming more believable

“wear this one,” mingi ignored your words, holding the wine colored dress you had next to the red one, his eyes looking up at you. the sight was familiar, his pupils resembling the last time you saw him and you shook your head. “i settled on the red one.” you mumbled, looking back down and picking up the dress

“it’ll end up on the floor either way.” mingi shrugged, and you swore you had never lifted your head that fast in your entire life, completely baffled at his words. “who said you’ll be taking it off me?” you gladed, he responded with another shrug and leaned back on your bed.

“you’re not wearing anything under that robe, aren’t you?” his voice lower than before, completely ignoring your question and glare as he eyed your body up and down. if there was one thing for sure, no matter what, mingi’s voice always managed to send heat to your core, making your thighs press together. you hated this, you hated him. “mingi..” your voice wavered, face growing in warmth

mingi hummed, “answer my question, doll.”

you knew it wasn’t a good idea to entertain him, it was a horrible one. you shouldn’t give in, and you were wasting time, a lot of it. shaking your head, you turned away from him, your back on display and you heard him let out a soft groan.

opening your mouth, you planned on telling him to get out and go home, no matter how much you craved him and his touch. you needed him to leave before the cycle started all over again, but your breath hitched into your throat, feeling his hands on your hips that tugged you closer to press your back against his chest. you could hear his heartbeat, each thump filling your ears. “mingi..” repeating his name again under your breath softly, barely audible. you could feel his fingers pressing into your skin, “mhm.. that’s my name.” he teased, hand slowly sliding down, lightly treading its way to your inner thigh

subconsciously, your head fell back on his hardened chest, allowing him to continue his movements before you felt his cold palm on your bare inner thigh after pushing aside the satin that covered most of you, a breathy laugh escaping his lips and he hummed in your ear, teeth lightly nibbling your earlobe. “hmm.. so i was right,” he rasped in your ear, “you aren’t wearing anything under this.”

“mingi, i have to go soon..” you mumbled, feeling his hands roam all over your body, not leaving an inch of you untouched. he only clicked his tongue, as if he was not wanting you to bring it up and it was an inconvenience, pulling the fabric of your robe off your shoulders enough to press a few kisses on your warm skin. “tell them you can’t make it.” his voice slightly muffled against your skin, leaving trails of kisses on your neck and shoulders, “you’ll do that for me, won’t you?” whispering into your ear, sending shivers down your spine

embarrassed would be an understatement, how his voice alone lead for you to press your ass against his clothed crotch, a groan from his throat escaping that only furthered your movement. fuck, what were you doing?

“do you want this?” he whispered, turning you around so he could look at you, the robe you wore hanging off your shoulder. he gulped at the sight, your matching set peeking through more and the ache in his pants showed with how prominent his hard-on gave away. with a shaky exhale, you slid your hand to the back of his head, tangling your fingers in the strands of his hair and nodded, pulling him closer. “i do, mingi.” you reassured him, leaning in with your mouths inches apart, his warm breath ghosting your lips

mingi groaned slightly, the tugs you gave his hair made his eyes flutter shut with a soft plea under his breath escaping, his hands holding onto you, “yn.. don’t lie to me.” he clenched his jaw, head tilting back enough to give you more access to his neck. with no hesitation, your lips dragged along his skin, kissing his adam’s apple and alongside his jaw, making your way back to his lips and kissing the corner of his mouth, “who said i was lying, mingi?”

and with those words, you didn’t have time to question yourself or take back anything, feeling mingi’s hands cupping your face and pulling you in, his lips pressing against yours with force. whimpering, the two of you kissed eagerly, the sounds filling most of the room along with breathy pants that managed to escape, hands roaming each other’s bodies. “fuck, baby..” he gulped, pulling away breathless

“do you want me?” you teased, grabbing onto his shirt as the two of you stumbled to your bed, mingi’s legs pressed against the mattress as he pushed the clothes aside in a haste and off the bed before his back hit the mattress, pulling you onto him with a firm hold. mingi nodded with another groan escaping, eyes closed and wetting his lips, “more than fucking anything.”

you could only tease him further, you wanted nothing more while rolling your hips against his hard clothed cock, whimpers and whines leaving mingi’s mouth repeatedly, his nails sinking into your hips.

with a soft moan, mingi’s hands guided you to move harder onto him, picking up the face that made you let out another moan, palms flat on his chest and letting him take action. “don’t lie to me..” your voice soft and breathy, mingi pulling you down and grabbing your face by the jaw, making you look at him as he rolled his hips up into you, the thin layer of your underwear soaked from arosual.

sliding his hand down to wrap around your throat, he applied only the slightest pressure, “who said i was lying?” repeating your words back to you, his other hand moving to unclasp your bra in a swift motion, tossing it aside

“fuck, mingi—“ you gasped, feeling his cold hands cupping your breasts, mouth latched onto your nipple and swirling his wet tongue. soft pants left your mouth, only increasing your desperation in your movements, pressing your hips onto him, mingi groaning around your skin. “get up.” his voice was muffled but you heard it loud and clear, his tone more demanding before he moved his mouth off you, you wasting no time to get off his hips, eyes fixated onto him as he pulled his shirt over his head, throwing it somewhere in the room and pulling you back towards him, flipping the two of you to have him hovering above you.

hooking your fingers onto the silver necklace mingi wore that hung over you, doe eyes looking up at him and pulling him by the jewelry to kiss him again, groaning into his mouth. “god, you just can’t get enough of me, can you?” he smirked against your lips, grabbing one of your legs to hook around his waist and give him more access to grind his hard cock against you, another moan leaving your mouth. “you’re better than any fucking high,” he muttered, his teeth nipping and biting at your neck, your hands tangling in his hair with a shaky moan leaving your mouth.

“i fucking need you..” mingi said with a sigh, looking down at you and you nodded eagerly, wanting more than what this was, craving to have him again in every way. it was already late, you could come up with an excuse later, but right now, hearing your lover gasping and groaning, moving to lay on his back and pulling you onto him, you needed more. with your head falling back, mingi pushed your underwear to the side, his two fingers sliding and rubbing your wet pussy, finally having some sort of skin to skin contact that you desperately needed. you moaned instantly at his fingers rubbing against your clit repeatedly, “yeah? you like that?” he asked you with a smirk

“uh huh,” you hiccuped, leaning to kiss him as you continued moaning into his mouth that he accepted delightfully, tongue massaging against yours, drool pooling down your mouth while his fingers pressed against you more, gasping at one slowly pushing into your entrance, mingi groaning at the warmth. “mingi—“ you whimpered, looking down at him witn doe eyes thag he only responded to with a smirk, pumping his finger in and out of you agonizingly slow

“all wet for me, baby?” he taunted, shoving the second finger he had into you, his movements growing rougher as you moaned, head falling onto his shoulder, grinding your hips into his fingers for more, hearing him chuckle. “such a greedy whore, you still want more?” he teased, “my fingers aren’t enough for you?”

whining, you shook your head, “need you..” you mumbled, mingi stopping his movements which only made you whine more at only feeling his slender fingers resting inside of you. god, he was enjoying this. the smirk on his face being enough proof he got off to how desperate you were becoming for him, lifting yourself so you could slide off your underwear and toss it aside.

“then undress me, baby.” he sat up, propping himself against the headboard and giving you more access to his lower half, “if my lover wants me, come get me.”

locking eyes with him, you crawled back to him, eager hands messing with his jeans, trembling with desire as you unbuttoned and pulled them down enough to see just how hard he was, gulping at the sight. “don’t worry baby, we always make it fit don’t we?” his voice making your eyes flutter shut, whimpering softly, fingers sliding under the waistband

gulping, mingi’s head titled back, licking his lips and hissing at the cold air hitting his hard fat cock once you pulled out his length, lightly tracing the veins. you moaned at how heavy and hot it felt to the touch, the tip red and desperate for a release, you looked up at him, stroking his cock slowly. hissing at the action, mingi looked up, head now fully back as he gulped, a sensual groan following after.

“put it in your mouth, baby..” he nearly growled, hand sliding to the back of your head, pushing you slightly to his length. your mouth immediately began salivating, god, he had such an effect on you and you didn’t need to be told twice when it came to taking him in your mouth, wrapping your swollen lips around his cock that resulted in a sharp inhale from him as soon as the contact was made

your tongue swirled around the tip, looking up at him and how his features scrunched, chest rising up and down, “fuck— please..” he begged, shoving his hips up into your mouth.

grinning, you pushed your head down to take more of his cock into your mouth, feeling him already hit the back of your throat from how big he was. his breathing grew more ragged, your movements increasing and continuing as you worked on him, swirling your tongue and spitting, watching his hands grip the sheets. “oh fuck..” he groaned, “just like that baby, you always do so good for me, yeah?”

moaning at his words, mingi’s choked back another groan at the vibrations that stimulated him even further, his fingers in your hair pulling and tugging, guiding you up and down his length more, grinding his hips into your throat which furthered the vibrations that stimulated his throbbing cock from each moan you gave

you looked up at him with half lidded, hazy eyes and you felt his cock twitch in your mouth just by him looking at you. “god, you’re so pretty..” his voice breathy as he groaned, shoving his cock further into your throat and made you gag slightly

but mingi had other plans, pulling your head up and off his cock and shoved his lips against yours, groaning at the taste of him on your lips and tongue, “gonna take my cock like a good girl, hm?” he drawled, you nodded eagerly in response

and before you knew it, you were under him again and feeling him rub his swollen tip along your wet folds, whines leaving your lips as he trailed open mouthed kisses on your chest, hands roaming your body before one settled on your waist, the other moving to hold his throbbing cock. looking at you one more time, mingi smirked, “look at me, baby.” he rasped, “you know to look at me when i put it in,” he teased, and you whined

with the new eye contact, you struggled to maintain it while mingi continued his teasing, your begs sounding better than music to him. fuck, he could listen to you forever and ever. “i know, baby..” he murmurd, aligning himself at your entrance, “i’ll give you what you want…” starting to push his tip into you first, your head falling back into the pillow, a crying moan escaping. “i’ll give you what we both want..” he continued, his large girth pushing into you more and more, inch by inch, stretching you deliciously.

mingi held back a groan, your walls immediately clenching around him with each inch he gave you, finally bottoming out with his hands holding onto your hips, your face scrunched and breathing heavy as you adjusted to him again, holding onto his forearms, “please..” your voice barely audible, soft and breathy, looking up at him with half lidded eyes

“such a fucking slut..” he cooed, slowly sliding out before slamming back, your back arching immediately with a yelp leaving your mouth, head falling back. moving your hands to his shoulders, you held onto him tightly, feeling him thrust into you hard enough to leave you breathless, your walls clenching around him and hugging his cock tightly with each sound he made and words he fed you into your ear. “fuck, take this cock..” he groaned

sighs, moans, and whimpers echoed in your room, nearly filling the entire house, the occasional slap of your thigh overpowering the noise and the cry of pleasure and pain leaving your mouth. “fuck! mingi…” you cried out, only having your lover fuck into you harder, hand sliding up to your throat, not yet applying pressure but the placement only having you dizzier with pleasure, shoving your hips to meet each thrust that mingi roughly pushed into you.

nibbling lightly on your ear lobe, mingi kept his rough pace, groans filling your ear and you could feel him throbbing wildly inside you, the knot in your stomach tightening.

“yes! right there, mingi!” you cried loudly, the tip of his cock hitting the spot that had your toes curling and burying your face into his neck, nails dragging down his back, “right there..” you slurred

“right there?” he repeated, you could hear the smirk in his voice while he moved your leg over his shoulder that gave him more access, allowing himself to go deeper and hit that spot more, “such a good fucking slut for me..” leaning in to take your lips in for another hungry kiss, lips brushing against each other as they failed to connect and properly lock from the rough pace mingi had, your brain lacking and falling behind at how far gone you were in the pleasure, mingi nipping at your bottom lip, holding onto you to slam inside harder

clenching tightly around him, mingi hissed under his breath, “oh fuck yes..” his cock throbbing inside of you, thrusts growing sloppy while you cried in pleasure, nails digging into his skin, moving to grab the back of his head to deepen the kiss you guys shared, crying into his mouth, fingers messing with the necklace he wore

“i’m so close..” you whined, voice dragging and slurring with your eyes tightly shut, the hand that rested on your throat now applying pressure that sent you even more towards the edge, legs slightly trembling at how close you were, “oh fuck!” you cried out, teary eyes opening to look at up mingi, the pressure and the blood rushing towards your head made you see stars, feeling him loosen his grip to hold your face to keep you looking at him. “mm.. mingi!”

“fuck, yes— say my name, baby.” he breathed, sweat trickling down his forehead as he focused on his harsh thrusts, “let everyone know who’s fucking you this good.”

he suddenly slammed into you, making you cry out loudly, eyes struggling to stay open. you moaned loudly as he continued to speed up, letting out a yelp when he slapped your thigh, the sting feeling too good, not wanting him to stop.

mingi grit his teeth, feeling himself getting closer. “fuck, i’m gonna cum..” he groaned

“i-inside.. cum inside,” you replied breathlessly, nearly hiccuping as you held onto him. your words hitched, feeling your orgasm nearing, “fill me up, mingi—“

the words sent mingi over the edge, practically growling and groaning, holding your waist tightly and pushed himself into you as far as he could and was possible, his cock twitching intensely as you felt him release his hot load into you, your walls being painted with thick white ropes of cum, “fuck.. take my cum, baby.” his voice hoarse, your legs trembling as he kept with his thrusts, feeling yourself come undone immediately after

when he pulled out, both his cum and your fluid leaked out your body. your thighs trembled as you looked up st him, lifting your hand to wipe the sweat off his forehead, mingi leaning in to kiss you with more gentleness this time, “i love you.” mingi murmured against your lips

“i love you too.” you repeated back to him, kissing him again with more passion than any of the rest, “i need you to fuck me again,” you pulled away slightly, looking up into his eyes and the two of you shared a mutual thought

with his hands roaming your body, he lifted you up to put you on your hands and knees, his hands massaging your ass

because despite all the love in the world, while mingi entered you again with a low groan escaping his mouth and your walls clenching around him tightly, your soft moans filling the room again — as soon as mingi went home in the morning, you both had to accept that this will be the last time. “fuck.. right there..” you moaned softly, hearing his breathy pants as he thrusted into you

months passed, sitting in the coffee shop with wooyoung, planning the wedding that he would be having. after san ran to you for the best friend blessing, you now had the role as maid of honor, laying your head on the edge of your palm as you listened to wooyoung with a smile on your face. “i think that ones pretty,” your head motioned to the spring themed wedding, “the colors are nice.”

wooyoung hummed, “they are, aren’t they?” and you nodded, “that has my vote,” you sipped on your iced tea that was watered down by now

“i’m sure san would like it too,” wooyoung smiled, closing the book he had brought for the two of you to scan through for ideas, “i’m gonna use the bathroom, be right back.” excusing himself while you nodded, gathering your things so you could be ready to leave together when he got back

shoving the book into your tote bag, your stomach stopped at a certain voice filling your ears, lifting your head to look around the room only to notice that he wasn’t here, the sound coming from the speaker that played the shop’s music

‘i didn't hear a word she said

wasn’t that high, i swear.’

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