#writing is just hard period
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This why y'all should N E V E R delete your WIPs out of frustration because you think they're horrible, shitty, not good enough, etc. etc.
Because you can come back to your old WIPs with new skills and sometimes it just magically works! It's like a light bulb going off in your head! Suddenly that old spark of passion that originally inspired you to create the WIP in the first place has been reignited. Except this time, you have more skills at your disposal to create the story you want. ❤️
Writers keep in mind while you’re working on your current WIP, you’re learning skills that may not result in you being able to complete that particular WIP to your satisfaction, but WILL bear fruit in your NEXT WIP. Like, you might’ve blown up this science project, but next time (or the time after, or the time after…) you’ll nail it because of what you learned while setting fire to this one.
#take it from someone who used to control alt delete tens of thousands words worth of documents#that she can NEVER get back again#all because she was so frustrated in her own lack of writing ability#don't be too hard on yourself#writing is fucking hard#it's hard for professionals and amateurs#it's hard for people with years of training and experience who know what they're doing too#writing is just hard period#it is a JOURNEY so embrace it#writing positivity
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Zenos gets to have the terrible realization that he is the only prince with the patience to put up with him anymore.
#ffxiv#sketch#emet selch#solus zos galvus#zenos yae galvus#meanwhile emet gets to mull over all the bullshit that happened between 1.0 to arr#i also get to draw buff arr zenos around old solus for once AND i get to curse myself#because the way I draw old solus will be forever tainted by the sheer amount of time I also have in Hades#i cant help myself im sorry#just another little concept of zenos being well aware of the emperors health even though he notoriously barely remembers things#probably cause hes that one character that is terrifyingly observant purely out of how fuckin bored he always is#(and I also write him caring about his grandpa and being devastated by his death for... several reasons honestly but still)#its hard not to notice looking into his character how varis made zenos' life miserable right after he becomes emperor#i got to draw cute chibis in exchange for being a little sad at the concept#that zenos would worry about- as he continues to ail- his grandfather getting more and more lonely on his deathbed#also from noting that the brief periods he's pulled from his anhedonia is when he's helping other people
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🌸
#girls i know my period is coming when i start assuming nobody likes my writing anymore#or me/my personality lmao#please god grant me the ability to not care and not always compare myself to others.#do you ever feel like you work very hard and it doesn't really get seen#which like isn't even true in my case because I have such nice readers#but also it's sad to see some of them go away over time#and i wonder is it something i did or that i've gotten worse in some way#then i feel like i should just stop because it shouldn't feel so hard and so sad#not all the time just sometimes when I'm hormonal#my body is mean to me#and so is my brain#i'm scared about getting more in my head about it now that I have increasingly less time to work on my story#I had endless free time before but now I'm becoming a manager at work and it means I simply won't anymore#and i fear fading into obscurity and nobody noticing or missing me or my story/characters#time to talk to real people so i don't feel like shit lmaoooooooo i've had a whole weekend working on a cake topper for a client#that i don't want to make#and i'm tired
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Can y’all stop with the Felix requests? She literally just did an entire chart on hwa like an hour ago. Go read that, if y’all are here solely for Felix. Then scoot along elsewhere, ruby does enough as is for everyone else. Don’t make her feel obligated to post more about Felix, she should WANT to write about who she wants to. Not have to. That’s exactly what this is, she creates what she wants. She doesn’t have to do anything for y’all. She does it, because she wants to. Don’t take what she posts for granted because she could literally stop whenever she wants to and y’all would probably get pissy over it. Don’t be a pusher, just read what she posts. Its not that hard.
Hey, thank you for your support my anonymous friend, whoever you are- I appreciate you.
That Seonghwa natal chart analysis took me five hours to write and it's now almost 3am here so I worked very hard on it.
Ppl, pls don't send in requests or comment for me to do a reading on another person when I just posted something.
I find it rude and dismissive of all the work and effort I put into the published post.
And honestly, I have deleted so many demanding requests in my inbox to do more Felix stuff that my motivation to write anything Felix-related is zilch b/c the ppl who request for Felix never comment on any of my other posts.
Especially after I received a few hate comments in my inbox after my Felix astrology analysis that weren't worth the time of day to post.
Thank you for standing up for me, I value it and I wish there were more ppl like you in this world.
#wudwnsy answered ask#wudwnsy anon ask#skz hard hours#stray kids hard hours#so close to just not writing anything else on felix period stg
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My brother in law let me borrow Sonic Frontiers [also read: asked me if I had access to a PS5 and when I said yes, handed it to me and said "play this"] and now my two biggest gaming nightmares are merged into one! [Fast paced gaming mechanics and open world map structures]
Anyway, I've been playing for 8 hours.
#spazzcat barks#i also bought sonic x shadow origins#because im... well... going insane i think#i am having so much fun with the edgy hedgehogs#unrelated but i think my favorite version of knuckles is sonic frontiers knuckles#man is both really curious about whats going on and still shoving himself in to protect sonic despite being basically a ghost#we stan a king#knuckles and shadow are currently battling as my fav characters#also? really like sonic as a character?#the idea of a hero who is reckless and who cant say no to a fight no matter how bad an idea it might be#but who still manages to be a paragon of optimism despite the pitfalls of his personality#cool concept#it reminds me of something? a 90s anime protagonist maybe?#i keep thinking Luffy but i watched like... 20 episodes of One Piece so i think thats wrong#maybe Edward Elric if he werent so jaded#oh! to whom it may concern: i promise im still enjoying Hermitcraft and working on RnS#this does not mark a major shift in fandoms lol#ive just hit a... we'll call it a mental play period#im having fun with a new thing -- especially after the old thing was becoming tedious#[having a hard time writing no time for drawing etc]#end of rhe year rut#this is passing it nicely though
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whenever I see a fic where a character has a panic attack and another character helps them breathe in deeply like "Can you breathe with me?" or something like that it kinda instantly takes me out of it because I've literally never had someone know to do that for me in real life?? Maybe it's just me but idk do most people have enough basic knowledge on panic attacks to do that? And are also calm and collected and together enough in the moment to help someone like that? Idk man just feels unrealistic 🤷
#could be that my panic attacks manifest mostly with crying#but people usually try to either logic/ talk through the problem‚ offer to hug/other physical comfort or just listen and wait until it stops#I feel like it's very different based on who#so seeing literally every fic character do this is kinda wild to me#like even characters who weren't alive in a time period where much is known on mental health and panic attacks#fic writers begging you to give your characters different ways to help someone through a panic attack#also not accounting for the fact that when someone is panicking that kinda rubs off on you/freaks you out#and it's hard to think clearly and comfort the person. at least in my experience#fanfiction#ao3 fanfic#ao3#writing#writing characters#writing advice#ao3 writer
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i just wanna be honest real quick and admit that i cannot keep up with my dash at the moment. it used to be i could lurk a good deal during my work day, liking and commenting on posts/headcanons/etc., but that's not really the situation anymore. my managers are giving me more responsibilities on top of me just enjoying the people i work with and speaking with them a lot, so the amount of time i have here is shrinking -- and it's not even our busy season yet :' ) and honestly, once i'm home, it's a toss up whether i'll have the energy to be here or not. if it isn't work, i have personal things going on that sometimes tire me out mentally or tank my mood. i'm simply not in the same position i used to be, so the time and energy i'm devoting to tumblr can't be the same.
i know most everyone i interact with is very patient and understanding, but i just want to explain bc i used to be around a ton and could take the time to hang around on my dash. even if i wasn't writing, i was still interacting in some capacity and showing my interest and excitement. and i'm trying to continue that! but it's definitely slowed down on my end bc i'm just not here like i used to be.
so yeah! just a small thing to keep in mind going forward -- when i say low activity, i really and truly mean it unfortunately. but i thank you from the bottom of my heart for sticking with me despite that <3
#an unnecessary long post perhaps but this has been on my mind for a while and i've spoken on personal matters#making it hard to be here at times but it's also just!! i'm getting more and more responsibilities at work#things are generally changing for me so it's a transition period and i'm trying to latch onto the bits of joy in each day tbh#we're doing fine but man it's a lot sometimes#anyway i'll be here for real soon -- got a chore i gotta do and then i'll be writing <3#get ready to ramble | ooc
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ive been staring at the naqtube channel page just doing analysis thoughts in my head for like 15 minutes and ive just been hit with the realization that Damn this is not normal. normal people dont do this. either the mental illness or the mild sickness is doing something to me right now.
#[cosmic heroes of dubious alignment]#IM NOT EVEN WRITING ANYTHING DOWN. IM JUST BRUTEFORCING THOUGHTS IN MY HEAD.#uhmmmmmm anyways. im trying to think of potential themes naq might have#and its like wow i am not good at recognizing themes bc im dense as bricks sometimes but i swear theres a repeating pattern of .. roles?#the expectation and breaking of stereotypical roles to be more specific#like listen to me here. obviously theres the line ive pointed out b4 with the 'theyre fighting evil/theyre [..] evil' line;#the lines in the unused takes video that paint n&q as less than morally good in /some/ sort of way;#queen buzzbeamer's whole deal as ive said ad nauseam; a more recent example i feel like would be part of the binary translated from hazard:#'this is who i am and who i will ever be'. accepting your role.#but also on a more meta sort of way with the games themselves. the female mcs getting more focus than the male mcs-#-in a time period where most video game mcs were male and the female characters were one-note is something noteworthy to me.#the fact that nebula is CONSISTENTLY framed bigger/more prominently in almost every piece of official art we see.#her name is first in the title. naq was conceptualized as a concept with her only first. shes always also featured in ads alongside quasar.#the only ad that features quasar prominently is the jumparound ad which alludes to it possibly being a request from sony#-and thus would want to play it more 'mainstream'.#by itself this doesnt stand out bc it could always be just the creators wanting some hashtag women in their unfiction series#which i would be fine with if that was the case. we love women. HOWEVER#its the fact that naq2 (from what we know so far) ACTIVELY TRIES TO BACKPEDAL ON THIS. which makes me think its INTENTIONAL.#both nova and nebula have seemingly been sidelined in naq2 with their screentimes reduced. nova reduced to a 'supporting character' and -#nebula into a possibly offscreen kidnappee. QUASAR takes their spotlights in naq2.#...maybe a way of 'making back lost sales' from naq1? pivoting too hard into the stereotypical from the unusual...#because obviously thats whats scaring away your customers. not the white room scandal. totally not.#'..ok is this leading up to anything mara. whats your conclusion statement' idunno man.#i just think its an interesting tidbit that keeps popping up. i am not a coherent theory guy#i am a pointing out things and throwing them at the wall to see what sticks guy.#there is also the very real chance that im completely wrong abt naq2 bc we still dont know a lot about it sooo. shrug.
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watch me speedrun my english homework in 30 minutes (its due at 11:59pm)
EDIT IM GONNA REUSE ONE IVE ALREADY WRITTEN i hope my english teacher doesnt mind getting trauma dumped on (im physically incapable of writing a happy poem)
#i have to write a poem and analyze it#which shouldnt be hard i write poems all the time#BUT I CANT JUST DO IT ON COMMAND#I HAD ALL CLASS PERIOD AND COULDNT COME UP WITH SOMETHING#okokok wait its 11:27 i gotta lock in#eunoia annoys '♡'
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wash tormenting the reds in the most petty ways possible because he's still pissed off about them hitting him with a car and then blowing him up in s8 is so important to me you don't even understand
#I'm pretty sure I've said it on my old blog before but wash is the blues older brother but to the reds? he's the neighborhood bully lmao#that scene in s13 where wash gets all the chorus soldiers to turn on grif for refusing to attend the training sessions? 100% an act of#calculated cruelty on wash's part lmao#oh oh or in s11 when wash hooked up blue base to the ships power but not the reds? also calculated lol#wash stealing all of their stuff in s10 will also always be a fav petty wash moment of mine#he is out to make them suffer and they're not even aware of it lol#rvb#agent washington#mine#if i ever write my ct lives au fic I'm going so hard on petty grudge holding wash#he is an absolute menace but he's so lowkey about it that in universe trying to convince ppl that wash is as petty as he is#is nearly impossible#the only ppl aware of wash's true nature are the counselor the director ct alpha and probably maine (and maybe florida)#everyone else sees him in a similar light as his fanon characterization#that's part of the reason why i think lina was so shock in s10 when he turned his gun on her bc to her wash was always so subordinate that#she just genuinely never saw it coming#anyway wash/ct/maine friendship is so important to me. i like to include south in there too sometimes but honestly south comes off as a#loner type. like she doesn't mind ppl but no one except north is really willing to tolerate her uh....personality for long periods of time#shes very....reactive and emotionally charged#but tbh id be that way too if i was stuck with north#north unironically reminds me of my dad but not in the good way lol#god my tags are all over the place#audhd brain goes brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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#sorry lol#i barely have any time to write lately#i see you smudged lipstick lovers#trust me i want to write the last chapter as much as you want to read it#life has been so weird these past few months#i promise im trying#its just hard#im hard#sorry my cat took my phone and typed that#i swear im a dignified mature woman#but seriously i feel so bad for rarely posting#on my old acc there was this period where i posted a fic once a day for like a month#i miss that#♡ . jade rambles
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why hurt
#corner.txt#literally why do i have cramps AND feel weirdly dizzy ? im not used to working during the daytime huh#im sitting in the library and want/need to write this essay up but the weird nausea (?) or dizziness is making it hard#or maybe im tired ? or hungry?? need caffeine????#idk#local autistic person doesn't understand what their body is feeling#i just know i feel weird#i think maybe my noise cancelling headphones are making it worse somehow? i am so confused#i hate being on my period i bet its cos of that ughh
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honkai: star rail or omori
HOW COULD YOU ASK ME THIS. I'M GOING TO PUT YOUR GARRUS FICS IN THE LIBRARY AND KISS YOU OVER THE PAGES.
#🐇#i actually don't know the answer DJAKLBJADJFKDA it's really hard to be objective about The Current Hyperfixation#i want to say omori has had a more profound influence on me but i mean honkai is getting up there it just needs some more time to percolate#it got me into reading and very close to writing chinese fic#has me making aus even modern aus and daydreaming about fluff and happy endings#these are all new things for the sunny...#the same way omori got me into horror for real and had me writing outline fics and lowercase fics and the most deranged exciting things#and was the first fandom i broke 100k for but honkai is at 85k now so we're getting even#I LOVE BOTH OF THEM A LOT THAT'S FOR SURE#only time will tell if honkai will stay past the honeymoon period but either way i am happy with everything it's given to me hehe
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I realize I've been so flaky with responding to asks, finishing my drawings or fics I promised, etc. I've kind of been drifting in and out of tumblr without interacting much. Real life just finally started, and I need to build up a ton of motivation and find time before I can work on a fandom project. Just wanted to say that I'm still here and still working on stuff, just slowly.
#i'm speaking to a dead fandom but still lol. thought i'd disclose.#i've reached new levels of perfectionism with my art which prevents me from drawing or posting anything at all#and my writing has really changed in the last few years to the point where i don't feel a space for myself in fandom#not sure how to explain it i just don't feel like i really have a space on ao3 or tumblr or even discord. like i don't enjoy fandom -#- much anymore or any/all of the things that most people in the fandom enjoy.#not because of any drama or discourse that happened. i just genuinely feel like an outsider.#i'm still trying to get myself to write because i have so many unfinished projects i want to post#but at this point it's like. writing to a brick wall?#i don't want to be an author who stops posting because my works don't get enough interaction or whatever. the tog fandom -#- is in a quiet period. it's gonna happen. esp with the way fandom is nowadays.#so i don't want to do that to the people who actually read and love my work#i just want to express how hard it really is to keep writing when you 1) feel you don't belong in fandom / are an outsider#and 2) have next to no interaction on your works.#maybe it would be easier to write and post if my wips weren't all long. i think that's also part of it.#so to the people who actually reblog my art and take the time to comment on my fics: genuinely i appreciate you so so much.
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A while ago you did a CKAU fusion-au and talked a bit about Sam/Dream, Punz/Dream, and Punz/Sam fusions. Is there ever a time where Awesamdrunz ends up in a three part Sam/Dream/Punz fusion? I imagine it would have to be fairly late into the relationship development, well after the communication knife is more a symbol than a real threat. Maybe well after everything has become soft and the edges between them have worn away, they're relaxing together. A comfortable collection of three people basking in their love for each other and then suddenly it's just one person who is loved-loved-loved.
I'm not sure what they would look like, but I bet they'd have Sam's ability to purr and just... not ever stop. Like, constant state of purring.
yseyseyesyse I zoom around you very quickly.
And then I read it again and zoom faster because eeeeeeee. I'm trying to think of how it happens. Its not intentional, definitely not, maybe they're all just so deeply cuddled together and Dream thinks about how nice it would be to be so pressed together they become one person. Maybe Dream and Punz are having fun playing around while Sam makes dinner, and Punz nudges Dream with mischief in their eyes, before they both sneak over and kiss a surprised Sam on each cheek. Maybe they're watching a stream on the couch, Punz petting Sam's flank from where they've been loafed on, while Dream is cuddled up in Sam's arms, and Sam just wants More, to be just a little closer.
There is only purring forever. They are all curled up, fluffy fur and bee wings and paws. When Sapnap comes over to visit later that afternoon, he will get disgruntled purring and a large Paw will gently shove him out the door. This Is Warm Basking Time And Must Not Be Interrupted.
#ask boxed#awesamdrunz#fusion au#hi sorry this took so long every time I read the ask I'd go insane and have to spin them in my brain for long periods of time#its very hard to write and not just burst into zoomies#I have to go take a walk now to get the zoomie energy out#DID YOU KNOW THAT THEY LOVE EACH OTHER YOU KNOW YOU UNDERSTAND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER AND THEYRE HAPPY AND I LOVE THEM AND
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somewhere out there is an alternate timeline where toby was correct and people actually did hate spamton. could you imagine that. i have to imagine we wouldn't have gotten the spamton sweepstakes in that case which is crazy to think about given how much lore that gave us-
#puppy rambles#deltarune#spamton#my favorite part of the spamton sweepstakes is the part of the q&a where spamton implied he and jevil are divorced#are all the secret bosses in a polycule you think. we need to add to this deranged relationship#diversity win! all the people who were driven insane by being told their world is just a game are in a polyamorous relationship <3#i like to think gaster made a discord for all of them. just like ''hey. sorry for telling you your world's fake. here's a discord. good by'#i don't even care about the secret bosses super much but they still amuse me greatly. even if there's only two of them rn-#spamton is so hilarious. idk why everyone is so obsessed with him but it makes him even funnier to me#also his text in brackets is fun to write. it's also hard to write but you can do so much with it#since it's taken from various places on the internet you can just reference memes#... i mean the one problem is that it'd probably have to be memes from the time period deltarune's in#so like. early 2000's or 2010's#but the valentines don't regard that and reference more recent memes so who knows really#maybe deltarune's actually meant to be in modern times. i mean you could fully convince me#that noelle just likes old internet-style websites and stuff dfskljfdsdfjksfkjlsfkj-#(i mean some of the meme references are up to interpretation)#(but the two definite ones are the war thunder forums leaking military documents and also the hotel mario intro)#(and at the very least the former is a newer thing)#(there's also seemingly references to the ''let me in'' meme and the foam shower images from the april fool's newsletter last year)#(idk where the fuck else ''insulating foam'' would be taken from-)#i hope spamton just randomly contributes to conversations sometimes if you have the dealmaker equipped#i logically doubt it but it'd be extremely hilarious#i'm now imagining equipping the dealmaker to noelle. who was not there for either spamton encounter#''um. kris why's there a voice in my head telling me to be a big shot?'' ''don't worry about it''#alternatively if you just get the dealmaker from the hole in castle town cuz you have another file with it#... can you do that in chapter 2 files. if so then can you technically have the dealmaker while not having met spamton-#''player why is there a voice in my head telling me to be a big shot'' ''don't worry about it''#''i'm sparing you from having an existential crisis later-''
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