#wow i really wasnt going to say anything but this fucking GOT ME

[deanncastiel]

Ok so for those of you who might be a smidge confused as to why so many of us may be upset about ted going back to kansas to be with his son bc "it was always going to end up like this" "thats his boy of course he was going to go back" "Ted's entire journey was about how to be a better father and not to do to henry what ted's father did to him" like

Y'all realize that parents are people too, right??? They have their own thoughts and beliefs and friends and things that make them happy and interests (special or otherwise) and hobbies and relationships outside of their children and and and and and

To say that his ENTIRE character arc revolves around his son is reductive and perpetuates terrible ideas about what it means to be a parent and what they are expected to sacrifice for their children

Ted's arc revolved around Ted. And part of that, sure, was being a father. But it was also being a husband, and a friend, and a coach, and an individual person who is trying to move on from their trauma and mistakes and people pleasing needs and set boundaries and accept that they dont always have to be happy and optimistic 100% of the time and that its okay to be upset sometimes and

And if y'all have somehow missed that, then no wonder we have very different views on ted's ending

[puppyeared]

AND I MET THE CHANGE GOD TOO. OKAY. COOL OKAY

[yeahyeahchloe]

It Wasnt in my Head (3)

(a/n: pls lmk if u see any typos! )

Summary: Abby is the starting linebacker at UW and when her team starts to falter her coach decides to get the team into ballet, in order to teach them that grace and stability is important in football too. Abby is just as upset about her teammates about this, until she sees her pretty new ballet teacher...

dancer!reader x football!abby

!!ABBY IS STRAIGHT IN THE BEGINNING. READER IS HER GAY AWAKENING!!

˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖

This whole house smelled like total ass.

Dina was excitedly walking next to me trying to guide me to the alcohol, as Ellie looked for her friend.

"Abby!" Ellie exclaimed from my left.

I turned to look into the direction she was facing and just about shit my pants.

It was the pretty blonde from the football team.

She smiled at Ellie and they gave eachother a one armed hug in greeting.

"So this is Dina and Y/n, guys this is Abby," Ellie introduced us both.

Abby nodded her head at Dina in greeting before turning to me and hesitating.

"Hey, yeah no we've met," She said to Ellie signaling at me.

"Oh? Where?" Ellie inquired curiously.

"She is the little ballerina that got stuck teaching the varsity starters," Abby told her with a smirk.

"Y/n, you didn't tell me you were teaching the varsity starters,"

"I, uh, I guess I didn't think I would be running into one like this," I answered Ellie before turning to Abby, "Well, Abby, its nice to properly meet you,"

"Pleasures all mine," She answered with a friendly smile and a slight head nod.

Oh wow fuck me.

"Okay, well were gonna go get drunk. Bye!" Dina said, pulling my arm and dragging me away towards the kitchen.

I decided to just pour a vodka soda for me and Dina while we chatted.

"So what do you think of Ellie's friend?" She asked, sending a smirk my way.

"Oh, god, was is that obvious?" I reddened and hid my face with my hands.

Dina guffawed before answering, "Only to me I think, but I get it. She's totally your type,"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Oh c'mon! She's tall, super built, big nose, commanding presence, athlete. She was basically made just for you,"

"Ok ok fine, she's perfect, but I am way to awkward to ever initiate anything,"

"Well, maaybe just try talking to h-" Dina cut herself off with a large gasp, "Ohmygod Jesse is right there!!" She gasped, pointing to the boy across the room. "I'm gonna go talk to him,"

"No Dina don't leave me,"

"I'm going in,"

"No, D, please!" I begged her as she strutted off.

I turned around and started digging for stuff to make myself a drink, but the stupid grenadine was too high on the shelf.

A hand reached above my own and grabbed and handed it to me.

"Thank yo- oh its you!" I said, turning around to face the person who had helped me.

"What, wishing for someone cooler?" Abby teased with a smirk.

"Ugh, no. Dina is off with Jesse now, so, I'm gonna drink it off," I told her, gesturing to Dina and Jesse making out on a couch.

"Oh god lame. But I kinda get it, I was the same with this one boyfriend,"

My head snapped back to her with a look of disbelief, and before my brain could catch up to my mouth, I blurted; "You aren't gay??"

"No? What, you are?" She asked, matching my disbelief.

"Well, yeah," I said as if it was obvious.

It really isn't, but I'm trying.

"Ah, well, you had me fooled," She said, face tinged slightly pink.

"Yeah, me too" I answered her, exhaling through my nose in an awkward laugh.

"Well aren't we a pair, breaking our stereotypes and whatever," She told me, confidence fully back on. I laughed a little before she continued, "So do you, like, have a girlfriend?"

"Oh, uh, not at the moment, no. Trying to take it easy right now," I responded, before following it with "You must have a boyfriend, though"

"Nah, no. You could say I'm taking it easy too, real focused on grades and sports,"

"What are you studying?"

"Pre-med. My dad's a surgeon, so its kinda in the genes,"

I was shocked by her answer, its not often you see a football player spending their time actually studying something useful instead of doing drugs and partying.

"What about you?" She asked.

"Oh, uh, the arts. I do painting and stuff. And obviously dance, uh, and also law, I'm looking to go FBI," I said, getting embarrassed by my much lamer response.

"Oh, that actually sounds really cool. I bet you have a shit ton of work," She told me, seeming genuinely interested.

"Yeah, well, you only get a scholarship once,"

"Yeah, yeah, true,"

The conversation was starting to falter so I told her to follow me.

"Hey Ellie!" I greeted as we approached the girl.

"Hey, are you ready to..." She made a signal with two fingers signing she wanted to smoke.

"Hell yeah," I answered before turning to Abby, "Wanna join?"

"Of course I do," She responded with an excited glint in her eyes.

We squeezed our way through sweaty bodies and makeout sessions all the way to the back of the large house where the yard was.

Ellie reached in to her right pocket, dug around for a bit, scowled and then reached into her left pocket where she took out a small joint and a lighter.

"Y/n?" She said my name, gesturing the blunt to me, "Wanna light it?"

"My pleasure" I held the joint up to my lips, the flicked the lighter and lit it. I instantly felt the hot smoke flow through my throat into my lungs. I turned my head away from the two in front of me out of politeness and blew out the smoke.

15 minutes later we were all stoned.

"Hey. Hey, beautiful, aren't you like not 'sposed to do this? Cuz you, like, are gonna be a doctor or whatever?" I spoke while turning to Abby.

"Maybe, but I think all be ok," She chuckled at my state.

She held her weed good.

I didn't.

Ellie held hers good.

I really didnt.

I went to answer Abby when Dina came running up to us.

"Hey guys!" She greeted us.

"Heyyy D," I said to her elongating every syllable.

Dina took one look at me before turning to Ellie with the look a mom would have after her kids stole a cookie from the jar.

"Ellie, come on. I told you not to let her do stupid shit like this anymore, you know she's a total lightweight,"

Ellie looked around defensively and held her hands up in surrender, "Hey man, she asked for it. Besides I didn't do any, yaknow, for protection,"

Dina sighed, grabbed my arm, grabbed Ellie's, and told us were going home. I shouted a goodbye to Abby that was somewhere along the lines of "Bye gorgeous see you in class!" and shuffled alongside Dina out the door.

The drive home was filled with Ellies playlist, and when me and Dina climbed up the stairs and into out apartment we bid our goodnights.

My mind was fuzzy the whole time though.

It was full of one thing.

Abby Anderson.

a/n: this took forever to get out, whoops. working on pt 4 asap, might post later tonight if im feeling spicy.

[theosconfessions]

flashback-

if youd like to read the stephens from the beginning you can over here :)

if youd like to read the stephens continued you can over here:)

@ohsosims

theo-okay wow. all of this just for a tiktok about a 60 year old man?

scarlett- retros in.

theo-retro? you know your dad would kill you if he heard you call anything involving him retro right? hes not old as fuck you know.

scarlett-it was more of a dig at you than him. hes young. youre not. just want to point that out for anyone watching. makes you look creepy so.

theo-nice of you.well it can make me feel creepy sometimes but we fit.

scarlett-sure do

theo- [eyes narrow]

scarlett- so do you want to introduce yourself or?

theo-sure. im theo kline. im old as hell as scarlett likes to point out. i was on two seasons of the bachelor. one in ancient times. one recent.

scarlett- right! so to anyone who hasnt watched the first one theo did was the one where he met my mom, marlee, and the woman hed have a long affair with.

theo- nice dig.

scarlett- thanks [smirks] and the one that actually worked out despite theo trying to trash it whenever he could. the second season is where he met my dad.dustin.

theo- that wasnt where i met dustin.

scarlett- what?

theo- i didnt meet dustin on the show. i met him at his bar. just like we always said. and then he came on the show.

scarlett- wait? were you guys dating before he even came on the show?

theo- no, not dating. i encouraged him to apply though.

scarlett- WAIT.

flashback

dustin-wait what. the bachelor?

theo- youve heard of it right?

dustin- of course i have. i even not so freely admittedly have seen your season. with your wife.

theo-ah, marlee. well theres a reason why im doing a second stint. didnt work out.

dustin-i have to say this is the weirdest way someones ever asked me out before. like i liked you but im not sure i want to go on one date with just you. i need to see like 30 other people at the same time.

theo- c'mon dude i didnt mean it that way. look i signed the contract before i even came into this place and seen you. if i didnt do that,dustin. trust me id do this the old fashioned way because thats what youre worthy of. its a tv show ,man.thats it. and id think youd like it. cool people. cool place. and if you decide youre not into it . or me. or any of it you can def tell me to fuck off .

dustin- i cant believe im telling you yes right now

theo- really?

---------------

theo- i encouraged him to sign up.

scarlett- but you never asked him out before that?

theo- i wasnt sure i wanted to settle down so no. dustins the kind you do settle down for.

scarlett- you were married to my mom at the same time but you werent sure you wanted to settle down?

theo- well you seen how that ended up right? the jami thing? me being gay. it wasnt meant to last. but we got you out of it . so that is one good thing.

[spidermanifested]

Greed or Bido for the give me character thing so you can ramble for 3 hours straight grins

okay well i uave to do both of them now. you understand this.

GREED

how i feel about this character:

he is the perfect man. i want to lick him. no further comment

all the people i ship romantically with this character:

BIDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you know this. bido is such important representation as the first ever Fridged-For-A-Guys-Character-Development Barely-On-Screen Love Interest to be a middle aged bald man. every day i lose my marbles about how im cursed to carry this torch all by myself. four foot something homeless guy says fuck it ill do anything to save this person magnitudes stronger than myself, after ive already lost everything we built together. ill follow him into hell for the faintest chance of saving him. because hes my friend. and then he dies in his arms. abd a flashback of him looking lovingly into his eyes is the last straw to make greed accept friendship into his life again. royai WHO

i went into greed/scar in my scar post so im not typing all that out again but its also so good. extremely potent character development to be had. somebody validate me here im right

my goofy one is greed/madame christmas "married for tax benefits and also every couple years they meet up and have crazy sex" style. only a little bit because i thought about greed getting to say i fucked your mom shitlips to roy mustang.

is there ajybody else. im thinking. Uhhhhh. honestly i dont think so dvdggxf im too committed to the ones ive got and i have to put all my energy into those because NOBODY ELSE IS DOING IT!!! whole fma fandom spinning a roulette wheel to find a new random man they think is hot to ship him with every so often. when they could instead be sipping from my font of boundless wisdom.

my non-romantic otp for this character

the devils nest gang will never die. in our hearts and souls. also i need him and mei to be friends IMMEDIATELY

i DO appreciate the friendship between him and ling, but im not as nuts about it as a lot of people (i say with fondness). they can do bros attacks it is true. but they also knew each other less than a year, and sometimes it feels like people tend to. overstate i guess? the impact of ling and ed vs the whole, One Hundred Years Of Living In Human Society thing. i promise a couple of 15 year olds did not give him all that character development okay he was already basically there he just got set back a LOT because of the-- see now youve really got me rambling for 3 straight hours this wasnt even what the question was about

my unpopular opinion about this character:

wow i could have literally just waited one question to say all that. now i have to find a new one

uhhh "hes openly 200 years old and solidly established as an adult man from his very first appearance and the fact that his soul later gets a timeshare in a 15 year olds body does not change that fact and its alarming to stick your fingers in your ears and pretend that it does". is that unpopular. bbecause sometimes im so scared it is

one thing i wish had happened with this character

@catenation

okay now BIDO

how i feel about this character

would that i could simply transmit my feelings through a less uncertain interface than words. words alone cannot do them justice. look at my blog i guess

all the people i ship romantically with this character

greed and scar ive gone into already so now we can get into the even nicher stuff. Awesome

not quite romantic but i tjink he and ulchi had a fwb thing going on. bidos into hunks with sharp teeth we already know this

hmm i think theres a lot of guys in the series hed be INTO/would be into him to some degree or another, but i dont know if itd be romantic per se? like. theres only so romantic you can get with barry the chopper even if it would be really funny. "please please please let me chop up your tail it looks so juicy. itll grow back anyway right. ive never asked before"

also for catenation i thought itd be really funny to make him and greed and yoki into an extremely lopsided love triangle, where yoki develops a weird crush on bido which manifests in very odd ways that bido cant make heads or tails of and doesnt really care to because he doesnt like him at all. does that count.

i also have. a handful of crossover ships, which grew out of roleplays with friends. bidos boytoy and boytoy-adjacent collection includes

psycho mantis from your playstation

the bad guy in the harley quinn movie but not that version of him

KING MORGOTT, LAST OF ALL KINGS

and yes. they do smoke weed.

my non-romantic otp for this character

once again the devils nest gang at large has me in a vice. i care about greed and bidos friendship as well as the romantic aspect but the fact that bido doesnt really interact with any of the gang aside from greed SUCKS and i wish we could have seen some of that

however we do at least get a flashback of bido Standing Next to blondie and one of the bouncers. which in true "desperate enjoyer of a very minor character" fashion ive extrapolated into him having been good friends with that bouncer, because from what little pagetime he gets he seems levelheaded enough to win bidos trust. at a baseline i think bido would be wary around most humans and especially just after escaping, so knowing one reliably-decent human would have probably helped a lot with readjusting to the outside. & then i think out of the chimeras he was probably on the best terms with martel and ulchi, both from Reptile Solidarity and those two being more outgoing and upbeat than average

i ALSO WISH he got to meet mei because i think theyre really similar in a lot of ways. he would relate very heavily to being small and disregarded and saddled with the responsibility of helping so many people survive by whatever means necessary. they also both love yelling indignantly at rude people which is awesome. i think theyd yell at each other like that Once and then shake hands out of respect

my unpopular opinion about this character

all my opinions about him are unpopular babey Nobody is tjinking about him as much as me!!! he is important and memorable for one. and he is so brave and he loves his friends so much. he deserves as much focus as the rest of the gang if not more. he is the gayest fma character. and his face is HANDSOME he looks like an awesome muppet and if you cant handle that then get your ass off sesame street........

one thing i wish had happened with this character:

the chaptwr after greed gets introduced should have been just 43 solid pages of bido and greed making out rapturously, with the rest of the gang doing various tasks in the background. for flavor

[yearningandpatheticaboutit]

SPEAK FOR YOURSELF

CHAPTER 16: WOOYOUNG

wc: 5242

warnings: mention of death, violence, drugs etc, SMUT

prev chapter

***

san

i remembered that wooyoung was afraid. he was scared of what would happen if miss A ever found out he shot mingi and deliberately antagonized a hotshot black dragon. looking back, i thought the black dragons would be anatagonized anyway because we caused shit in their side of town to get yunho back, it shouldnt be this big of a deal.

so why are so many bad things happening?

i didnt go to school today. i emailed all my teachers a forged sick note, claiming i couldnt leave the house because i went to the doctor and got diagnosed with sinisitic dizzy spells. most of my teachers are really helpful and good people, so they sent me the work they did for the day so i wouldnt miss out.

being a 'delight to have in class' aka a quiet smart kid who wasnt a pain in the ass had its perks sometimes. regardless, i used my morning to get all my money ready, of which i had just over enough to go to miss A to get her off my back.

when i get there, the place is crawling with old gangsters. miss A is screaming at people and when she sees me she's shocked, as if surprised i actually had guts to show my face. shes propped behind a round steel table in her garage, leaning back in her chair and the room goes silent as her eyes are on me.

"look who it is," she says to me, dipping her cigarette in her ashtray. "Lucky, you better have good news for me."

i bow to her and put the potato sack of money on the table. unfortunately i didnt have anything really fancy like a briefcase. im a fucking gangster on a budget.

she glares at me. "potatoes? is this some kind of joke?"

three guys restrain me out of nowhere, holding a knife under my throat. my breath gets stuck in my throat and i only manage to force out one thing. "m-money."

she doesnt tell them to let me go, which pisses me off. what the hell did i do to make her this mad? she lifts the opening of the sack and only when she sees the cash does she wave the gangsters to get off of me.

they drop me so hard i fall with my butt on the floor and i make no real move to get up in case they jump me again. instead i get to kneeling. "miss A, that's the money from all the dealings."

"i can see that. oh wow, you actually decided to be useful," miss A says, getting up and coming up to me. she puts her hand down on my hair and gently scratches it like you would a dog and i struggle to not show any fear. "if only wooyoung could be like you."

her words make me sweat. "where is wooyoung, miss A?"

i swear, if she laid a hand on him. i dont know what i would do, but no one here, including me, would be left alive.

her eyes darken. "i was actually hoping you would tell me, Lucky. your brother has become a magician. a cold case."

she doesnt know? did wooyoung actually skip town?

"i told him to bring me the hand of who killed my boys or else i would have his. he hasnt been back in days."

fuck. this is bad. im actually starting to get dizzy.

someone rolls into the garage, and my face drops in horror at the man and his disfigured, burnt face. hes in a wheelchair, an armbrace and has a bandage wrapped over everything but his mouth and eyes.

"you and your buddy got changbin and a lot of good boys killed. look what they did to seonghwa." miss A says.

that's fucking seonghwa? he looks fucked. hes never recovering. he wouldve been better off dead. now he really looks like something out of a horror movie, a real, terrifying disfigured butcher.

"that hongjong motherfucker," miss A laughs but there's nothing joyful in it. "he came into MY warehouse, burnt MY cargo, killed MY men. and all because he was looking for you two."

im struggling to breathe. i dont show it but im silently breaking down. i cant take my eyes off seonghwa. thats it? thats my future? i might as well kill myself. seonghwa killed yunho, he was one of the topdogs in the gang. im fucking nothing. if thats what that hongjoong guy could do to him then its over for me.

"he said that?" is all i can get out. miss A lifts my chin and forces me to look at her.

"you're not a boy anymore, Lucky. you'll always be a baby in my eyes, but its time for you to get serious, dont you think?" she tells me. "wooyoung is gone. so someone has to fix this. you know the rules, you make a mess, and you clean it up."

"miss A-" i start stammering. i feel like im going to cry. "we didnt do anything. we never even met that hongjoong guy. wooyoung shot mingi because he tried to kill him. it was in self defence."

"did i ask for an account of what happened?" miss A's voice drips with sarcasm. "i dont care who did what. but my boys paid the price. i wont let an attack on my turf go unpunished. you find wooyoung and you two will go and kill that fucker or i'll have you swimming in a fishtank with the rest of yunho. am i clear?"

fuck no. fuck my life is over. i just started having sex and now i have to die. this is a fucking nightmare.

"yes, ma'am," i nod my head. "when do you want this done?"

"before my boys suffer another attack. he wants you, so let him come."

"you won't find him," seonghwa says and he sounds like a lays packet trying to talk. his voice is raspy and sounds terrible. "he only shows when he wants to be found. and he wanted to be found that day. so make him come to you."

i dont want him anywhere near me! i want to scream. look at what the fuck he did to you.

i have to run away. i have to do it tonight. i have to take everything. i cant think clearly, my brain is beating so hard i can feel it in my ears.

i nod and get up and miss A distractedly starts counting the money. "so you got the money fast. i always knew you could do it, you were just lazy before, yeah?"

i had help, i want to say. yaera's stealing, her savings, wooyoung stealing all mingi's gambling winnings, fucking jongho. i couldnt have done this on my own. i would have been dead by the end of this month.

i did all that, just to stay alive. only to have another target on my head. this...it never fucking ends. its only going to get worse. i cant win. this game, its unbeatable.

i almost want to laugh out of pure irony. and yaera wanted me to ask miss A for a fixed amount. she wanted to help me pay off my dads bullshit debt. im never going to be free.

my hopes and dreams are gone.

"you still have your dad's gun right?" miss A asks me. i say yes in the smallest voice.

she smiles. "you better get to using it then, Lucky."

i leave miss A's garage with nothing left in the tank. nothing but another assignment. an assignment that will kill me.

im the sacrificial fucking lamb. why is she doing this to me? because she thinks i can do it? because she wants to get rid of me? i did what she asked of me. i got her yunho. i got her the drug money. now she wants me to kill an assassin? an assassin that already has a bodycount of seven?

and hes brutal. four of those were other gangsters, luckily none of those were ours at the time, but he guts every one of his enemies. he was connected to a murder of a prostitute. and cut out the stomachs and sliced off the hands of two guys who apparently looked at his sister.

what the FUCK am i getting into.

i get home and i dont know what to do. everything comes crashing down on me. i throw my fist into the picture frames on the wall, sending glass bursting everywhere. i look at the picture of my parents, feeling nothing but burning hatred. i hate them both. i hate my mother for leaving me behind in this shit life and i fucking hate that bullshit excuse of a sperm donor for killing me.

he killed me. he signed my death sentence.

i start tearing everything apart. im ripping my apartment to shreds because nothing matters. this is all useless, nothing, i wouldnt fucking miss this place. i have nothing but awful memories here. but my anger doesnt last. it comes crashing down so fast that im left to collapse next to my bed and i cant stop myself from crying.

its over for me. everything is.

i had nothing to begin with. nothing except...

without even thinking, my bleeding hand reaches for my phone on my desk and calls her. she picks up on the first ring.

"san?" her voice is comforting and i dont know why. i dont fucking know this girl. she doesnt know me. but shes all i have. and i dont even reall have her. "are you okay? you never call me."

i cant even speak, im heaving into the microphone and sniffling uncontrollably.

"san?" she sounds more concerned. oh shes concerned for me. thats nice. i'll remember how nice it feels when i die.

"c-can you come over, please?"

i dont even recognize my voice. its cracking and its like the pained whimper of an animal. she puts off the phone and i wrap myself around my bedsheets, curling into a pathetic ball.

shes here within 15 minutes. i dont know how she got here so fast. she was supposed to be at school. it was still one period before lunch. she must have been skipping. i wish i skipped more class now that i know im not going to live very long. studying all that shit was pointless. i should have been living like her. like i dont have a care in the world. but i cant. and i never could.

she walks into my apartment with her eyes wide, dropping her blazer off her shoulders and onto my dirty floor. "what the hell happened? are you okay?" she runs and puts herself infront of me.

"did someone break in?" she holds my wet face. i never stopped crying. not once. she looks horrified seeing me this way. i cant imagine how bad i must look. "oh my god."

she hugs me. she hugs me and i grip her so tightly till i feel my lungs tighten. the tears are pouring harder now. im staining her white blouse.

"im going to die," i choke out. "they're going to kill me."

"what?" she gasps. "who?"

i try to speak but i dont stop crying. this is fucking awful. she shushes me and lets me continue, rubbing my hair in the softest way that makes me hope i wont die, just so that i'd experience it more than once.

"im here, dont worry."

of course you are. you're always here. always invading my apartment. always working on my nerves. always in my head since i fucking met you. i wish i didnt take that for granted for as long as i did. if i knew this was all i'd have left.

i dont know what possesses me. i pull away from her, my hands drift up to the buttons of her blouse. im careful so she knows i wont hurt her the way he did. she watches my bleeding knuckles, looking at me with tender eyes. she doesnt stop me. i flick open the first button as she stands above me.

"can i?" i choke out. "this is all i have."

she starts removing her own buttons. "you dont even have to ask," she tells me.

she trusts me so much. if this is all i have left then i dont want to destroy it.

she drops her blouse, revealing her bronze, skin bare skin and black bra. the sun in my blinds isnt doing her justice. i reach behind her and unclip her bra and her boobs spill out right in my face. her skin is warm. shes so warm. she lifts my ugly brown hoodie off my body, trailing her hand down my stomach.

her touch feels like satin. i dont deserve it. she doesnt deserve this.

"i-i dont want to use you as a coping mechanism," i tell her but im talking to a wall. i dont want to but i am. im going to die and all i want to do is fuck her one last time. there isnt enough time in the world.

she kisses me sorely, with way too much emotion for what we really are. two broken, fragile people. we have no business with each other, but she kisses me like i mean something.

"for you, san, i'd let you use me however you want," she whispers against my lips. "as long as its you."

i feel my heart pain. i want to cry again but my dick is hard and i can only focus on two things at once. so i deal with my boner first.

i slide down her thin, pink underwear from under her skirt and it drops to her ankles. she steps out of it and pulls my sweatpants out from under me, immediately sliding herself onto my dick.

she moans softly into my ear and it feels like heaven. shes like heaven wrapped in one complicated woman. she could destroy me. she could ask to end me and i would let her.

i'd rather it be you than anyone else.

i grip her softly and my hands are stinging but i dont care. i feel weak. but somehow with her here, it doesnt hurt as much. shes riding me slowly, its crazy how without any foreplay shes already drenched down there. i guess she does like me a little.

she peppers kisses all over my neck as i hold her up, losing my mind as she slowly sinks and rises onto me. i never fucking liked our stupid school uniform but seeing it on her like this, with her on me, just makes me lose my mind. jongho doesnt fucking know what he missed out on.

"you know i care about you right?" she whispers into my ear. "its about more than just the money. you know that right?"

my lips her are on her chest and i kiss her there slowly. "i know," i mutter. actually i didnt know that. i dont know what the fuck she sees in a dickhead like me.

"good," she says, then pushes me down to my back. she adjusts herself to straddle me properly but i cant watch her struggle to please me. i get back up and flip her under me, pushing her back down gently when she tries to protest.

"but-"

"i want you to feel the way you make me feel," i say. and i never thought i'd ever utter words like that. fuck, no wonder everyone thought i was gay.

i drag my lips down her perfect, sculpted torso and plant them onto her shivering, wet hole. she whimpers weakly as i stick my tongue inside, slowly impaling her with it. i dont care that im taking my time honestly. im going to die, so i might as well make this as long as it can.

i drink up her bitter juices, lapping my tongue across her slit. the moans she lets out are otherworldly, definetely worthy of a noise complaint. i dont mind it. i feel useful for once in my life. i slowly inch a finger into her warm hole, sucking on her pleasure button while im at it. i'd call it her clit, but thats too rough for me.

"san please," she begs. "i want you so bad, just fuck me already."

i stop at her request, getting up and over her. i line myself at her entrance, pushing in slowly. she throws her arms around my neck and the eye contact we have as i just lay there inside her is enough to make me drop it all. i'd drop it all and leave with her, wherever she wanted to go.

her hole feels like home. my dick fits perfectly inside her. its warm and hugs me and i cant get enough of it. i push in and out slowly, taking in her eyes. they havent left mine. her lips are parted in bliss, and i decide to kiss them. she moans into my mouth, and it feels like a fucking spell being casted on me. i accelerate the pace, and the lewd sounds of her squelching and our breaths syncing up are all that can be heard.

it turns around so fast. im fucking into her at a pace thats desperate. like if i fuck her any slower, its going to get taken away from me. everything will. her legs are wrapped around my waist and she clenches on me, as if she doesnt want me to ever leave. i dig my fingers into her skin, holding onto dear life as i feel myself getting closer.

"wait," she breathes. "i wanna do it standing up."

i pause mid stroke. "how?"

"against the wall. lift me."

i go along with it. we get up and she lays with her back against the wall, lifting her leg so i can put it in. i pick her up and she slides onto me perfectly, and this new angle makes my brain go foggy. its so much deeper and tighter, i can feel her soak onto me.

i start ramming into her against the wall and her hair is hanging down her face, making her look like a sexier version of the grudge. she looks utterly lost in it all, and its so enjoyable to watch. i feel like im doing something right seeing her looked so absolutely fucked out.

my legs grow weaker as i hit her walls, feeling myself getting closer to the edge. shes demanding, with her legs wrapped around me she wont stop till ive been emptied.

"you're so fucking perfect," she whisper-whines, and its enough for me to blow. i completely blow inside her and she creams on me at the same time, our juices mixed together like some fucked up smoothie.

i drop her and she doesnt remove her arms from my neck. instead she pulls my body towards her, till we're chest to chest, completely naked amd kisses me harder than she ever has before.

this isnt even because we're fucking. she just wants to do it. and honestly, i needed it so badly.

when she pulls away im left yearning for more. it makes me sick. "thank you," i tell her. "i needed this."

"i know," she says softly. "tell me everything."

***

after i tell yaera everything, we're sitting on the bed beside each other, a painful, weighing silence between us.

"what are you going to do?" she asks, sounding hopeless.

"i have to kill the guy. or miss A's going to kill me."

"the police?" she says but knows immediately it wont work.

"i'd die before miss A sees trial," i laugh emptily. "and i'd go to jail for sure. she has enough on me to make sure i'm wanted."

she's frowning. she's realizing money cant buy my freedom. or my life.

"after you kill that gangster...nothing will be the same," she says. "you'd have blood on your own hands."

i shrug and stare out of my window. "it ends here, yaera. for both of us."

she stands up abruptly and looks like she wants to break into sobs. "no you can't disappear after this. i still need you."

i smile weakly. hearing that makes me feel better. someone will miss me.

"when i'm gone, you can have my apartment. i have some money left over here, maybe you'll be able to get away for good. you'll never deal with that freak again."

she's not happy with my answer. "no, san. i dont want you to go. i dont want you to disappear. cant we catch a one way flight? can't we run? i'll run with you. i promise."

she actually wants to stay with me. when i dont answer yaera bends down infront of me, holding my hands. i cant believe how quickly things turned around. i have so much to lose.

"when you finish your business, we're getting the fuck out of here, okay? promise me. i'll get the tickets, i'll get everything ready. but promise me you'll come back to me."

i cant promise that i'll be alive. i want to, but i dont want to lie to her.

"i cant promise i'll make it back, yaera," i mutter. a tear rolls down her face. "and even if we run away, is this really sustaintable?"

"is what?"

"us?"

she scoffs. "i dont think now is the time to think of what we are. i dont care about defining this relationship, thats not important. all i know is, you're all i have."

"you're all i have too." i whisper.

"thats enough for me. so promise?"

"okay, i promise."

"good, now lets clean up here and pick a place on the map."

yaera and i spend the rest of the afternoon cleaning up my shattered apartment. i take my parents pictures and throw it in the spare room where i dont have to see it. when we're done, yaera makes herself at home and lays down in my bed watching youtube. i get dressed and she switches off her phone when she notices.

"where are you going?"

"remember those gangsters you met the night you followed me? im paying them a visit." i tell her.

"your dad's old gang...are you going to ask them to help you?"

"yeah. i wanna see if they've heard from wooyoung. get help where i can."

"okay. is it cool if i stay over?" she asks. "i dont feel like going home."

she doesnt even have to ask anymore. i say my goodbyes and make my way downtown.

getting into mao's place has always been shady, im surprised there are guys outside the door. they see me and are shocked to see me, letting me in and muttering shit in cantonese under their breaths.

i find mao sitting around a table and gambling and by god, i find wooyoung too.

he freezes when i see him and i have half the mind to beat the shit out of him. this is where hes been the whole fucking time?!

"sannie!" mao yelps with his cigarette dangling off his lips. "look we're finally good enough for him again! i heard you've been visiting everyone BUT me!"

i run across the room and catch wooyoung before he can run. then i pick him up and toss him into the closest wall. "you DICKHEAD!" i scream.

mao's men jump up from their seats and get between us. "woah woah woah!" mao shouts. "no fucking fighting under my roof! take that shit to the alley!"

"what the fuck man?!" wooyoung huffs. "arent you glad im alive?"

"you couldnt pick up a phone? you couldnt call me to let me know?" i snap. "i thought you fucking skipped town!"

"i had to toss my phone!" wooyoung stresses. "miss A is looking for me."

"i KNOW! I KNOW SHES LOOKING FOR YOU BECAUSE ITS BECOME MY PROBLEM, WOO!"

i start laughing hysterically. "we're fucked. we're both fucked because of you and i hope you know that."

wooyoung stands up, dusting himself off. he has a remorseful look on his face. fucking say something coward.

"i tried to keep you out of it," he admits shamefully. "i was gonna get it done."

"you were gonna kill hongjoong by yourself?" i scoff. "you'd be done for before you even do anything!"

"mao gave me a gun," woo says. i look to mao and he shrugs.

"you know about this?" i ask him.

"as long as he doesnt involve me, i dont mind helping out," mao says. "i dont want black dragons on this side of the world, but bae su ji is losing her touch."

"who the fuck is bae suji?" both woo and i ask angrily.

"Miss A."

"you know Miss A's government name?" woo questions. mao shrugs.

"we used to date in high school."

we're getting off track. im still fucking angry, i turn to wooyoung.

"so? let me hear this fucking plan of yours."

"i dont want you involved san. we cant both be dead."

it feels like my veins are going to pop. "she's going to KILL ME if i dont fucking do something about that hongjoogn fucker. he put seonghwa in a wheelchair and killed changbin. shes going to kill me if i dont get involved, woo, so just tell me the fucking plan."

"hongjoong's sister is getting married soon," mao interjects. "woo's gonna wipe him out there."

"and then im going to skip town for real," woo says with a dark look. "mao's arranged for me to go to hong kong. im gonna work for him there."

"you know who was also supposed to go to hongkong?" i laugh darkly. "yunho."

the room falls into uncomfortable silence aside from the sound of dominoes hitting the table.

"i'll be there, woo." i tell him. "im leaving town too."

"where are you going?" both mao and woo asks.

"im leaving with yaera," i answer woo only. mao is confused and wooyoung tells him its my girlfriend.

"you left Flor?" mao is shocked. i sigh remembering that yaera gave mao a fake name when she followed me. i dont dignify him with an answer.

"alright man," woo sounds defeated. "now you know. i didnt wanna keep in touch because i didnt want to make things worse."

"they're already bad, woo. you not telling me changed nothing."

ive calmed down significantly. i feel defeated but at least i know this bastard is alive.

"what about mingi?" i question. "he started this shit in the first place."

"im taking them both out," wooyoung says. "mingi's the groom. hongjoong's walking his sister down the aisle."

how convenient. two birds with one stone. now, how were we going to get out of it alive?

"WE, wooyoung," i correct him. "WE'RE taking them both out."

***

yaera

after i helped san clean up his rampage, i saw something interesting in his spare room.

i stare at the daewoo k5 in my hands, i never realized san was the kind to keep guns. with the way he lives, i guess i shouldnt be surprised. he needs it more than anything.

something dangerous popped into my mind when looking at it. the first thing i thought of was wiping santo off this earth.

wouldnt i be doing a good deed? taking that rapist, pedophile and fucking freak off this planet?

he called me again. from a different number. i never pick up unknown IDs because of him. but i picked up this time, and all i heard was him breathing harshly.

"i dont like being ignored, yaera. it hurts my heart. you dont want to know how i act when im hurt."

i wonder if yasmine found out, and thats how she ended up where she did.

i know he wasnt anywhere near her when she died, but the thought that he touched her the way he touched me...the fact that she enjoyed it. it was driving me insane. i feel myself losing it with every single thought that flashes by me.

i just want to leave. i want san to finish up his business, come out alive and free me from this place.

we decided on soroa, cuba. europe wouldnt be a good place for us to start over in. latin america would be fresh. its going to be better.

i tried to keep busy but my stomach ached for san. with every apartment i looked at, every beach and every municipality i imagined living in, i had a thought of san never seeing it. i feel so fucking helpless.

i cant fix any of this. i never could but ive never felt this cornered before now. if anything happens to him, i know im going to end up in a ward. i cant leave this place without him when he helped me get to this point.

my parents have left me so many missed calls. so have irina and claire. none from anya? thats weird. she always leaves me the most calls.

i decide to call irina back. i havent heard from them aside from drug related business so it'd be nice if she could take my mind off the fuckery thats been taking place. they always have the most interesting things to tell me. vacationing in saint tropez, partying in monaco, i'd love them to tell me about cuba.

irina picks up first ring. "hey girl–"

"you fucking bitch," she snares at me. i jolt up from the bed at her tone.

"hello?" i repeat in confusion.

"anya is DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU!"

fire creeps up on my skin. it feels like all my hairs raising.

"w-what?"

"she fucking mixed whatever pill you gave her and she threw up all over herself. we fucking rushed her to hospital and she didnt make it!"

this has to be why my parents called me. oh my god. oh my god anya's dead.

"i dont know what you mean," is the first thing i say. probably not the best thing but its the first thing i could get out. there has to be people around her right now. i cant risk it.

"now you dont know what im talking about?" irina snaps. "you fucking killed her."

"anya has a history of drug abuse, irina. why are you blaming me for this? im sorry for what happened but dont call me with this bullshit ever again."

i quickly put off the phone and start hyperventilating. fuck this is a mess, my parents probably found out. they probably know. if i go home im screwed. i cant go home, they'll keep me there.

how do i stay out of this. i know i cant go to jail, none of them have any proof that i dealt them drugs. not a single shred of evidence. there are the cellphone records, but those calls cant get traced back to me. the phone's too old. i need to stay away from them.

i have to fix this, somehow. i cant unload it on san he has enough on his plate. but it sounds like ive made an enemy out of the closest thing i have to friends. i dont know what to do.

i look at the gun on my lap. i have to finish the story.

***

next chapter

tagslist: @sansonlygf @brown88 @yujispinkhair @mountiiny

[pxssyboyares]

so when i was a senior in college a friend's little brother had a leg injury right before they had a big family hiking trip. they asked if i could watch the guy, take him to post op follow ups for the 2 week period theyd be out. he was 18, cute, i had met him only once or twice before. he took after his fairly religious parents so i didnt spend a lot of time with him.

anyway he was given painkillers and took them regularly, at one point we were just channel surfing and he just started rubbing himself thru his gym shorts. i asked of he was okay and he giggled and said yeah and asked if i was okay and kept going at it. he eventually got off and fell asleep. so the next day i didnt mention it and he didnt either. i wore gym shorts before we started watching evening tv and he once again started pumping himself so i joined in and then asked to see what he had and he slipped himself out then asked to see mine. so i got up moved in front of him and pulled my cock out. he started to say wow and i just slipped it right into his mouth a bit. he did a small suckans awkwardly bobbed his head then pulled off it and said he wasnt gay. i said i knew but he had to finish what hw started and he said Ooooookay. he went real pliable and let me just use his mouth. partway thru it i noticed he had already pumped himself off once. it wasnt long before i was getting ready so i pulled out and came all over his face. he wiped it off then fell asleep on the couch.

next say he didnt say anything. while he was st PT i creeped into his room and found a butt plug. so when we hung out that night, i waited until he got real sleepy, kept him from fully getting off, and then used the lube i found in his nightstand, pulled his shorts down to his knees, and then slowly and carefully slipped inside his ass. between the painkillers and the muscle relaxers he was on there was little resistence. i slipped halfway in before he let out a huge whimper, when i was balls deep he was gasping. i bit his ear and told him. softly that i was coming inside him every night till his family got bsck. he habbled incoherently between whimpers and moans

oH this could literally be me but instead ur just bragging in my inbox 🙄🙄🙄

could even be fucking my ass and have a toy in cunt if u really wanted

[dysaniadisorder]

I FUCKING HATE THESE GUYS I THOUGH OAKWORTHY WAS A JOKE?

[Transcript: Anthony: –Roll Insight, Normal. Will: [dice roll] All right, well I got a 5. Anthony: OKay!  Will: So I go— 

Normal: Sounds great buddy!

Beth: “Just one drop of blood!” [chuckles] 

Normal: No one would ever lie to me cause everybody loves me!  Will: And then I back flip out of Teeny the teen's arms and I land in the greased lightning car from Grease.  Anthony: Ooh! Will: And like kinda rev the engine and throw an arm– like Hermie's there and I like give him a smooch on the cheek and then I just floor it and just drive straight towards the exit that you were… Anthony: Okay. So–

Anthony: –Yeah. Matt: Oh yeah no Hermie's with, yeah. Anthony: I feel like Hermie would have jumped after you. Matt: Yeah. Anthony: Okay.  Matt: Hermie was just really quiet during that action scene. Anthony: Yes. Her—  Will: [laughs] Wait, was it actually Hermie I kissed on the cheek then? Matt: No, I think that wa—  Will: Because I assumed that was a mental projection of my head. Matt: Yeah, I think that’s a mental projection.  Anthony: Yes, it was a mental projection. Will: Okay.  Freddie: And then what happens to the real Hermie?

Normal: Wait, did Hermie see me kiss him?!

Anthony: So you turn around and Hermie's like fuming. [all laugh] Hermie is fucking furious.

Link: Hermie, you've been here this whole time?

Anthony: Green with jealousy and the Poison Ivy outfit that he is quickly assembling out of felt and fabric. And he goes—

Hermie: I've been here… the whole time. Scary: Oh, so now you know what it's like. Hermie: Yeah, I do. I do. Normal: [gasps]  Hermie: [progressively quieter] I'm just trying to get notes for Dante's Inferno, the play that we might put on, at school…

Matt: It does make sense Hermie's— 

Normal: I forgot they're making a play out of that video game. [Freddie laughs] 

Matt: It does make it sense Hermie's hell would be for none of us to notice him.

Hermie: [verge of tears] Yeah.

 Matt: Yeah, no atten—  Freddie: That is the ultimate theater kid hell! Matt: Yeah.

Normal: Hermie! –Uh, uh, hey, Hermie! Um, so you, uhhh– what's up?

Anthony: You see he turns his head away from you he goes—

Hermie: Don't, don't bother now. That Zone of Truth is off.  Normal: Wha-? Hermie: And– I can't believe anything you're saying anyhow. Normal: But wha– why? Why, why not–? Hermie: I thought we were special…! Normal: But- but I was— Hermie: I thought we were going to—  Normal: [voice cracking] But you saw who I was in the car with, right? Hermie: [quiet] Yeah. Normal: But it was you! Hermie: [sadly] No, it wasn't. Normal: It wasn't? I thought it was you! Hermie: No– It wasn't me. Normal: But I thought it was you! Link: Okay—  Hermie: But it wasn't. Normal: But I thought it was you though! [Matt laughing] …Do you know– do you see what I mean? I thought it was you! Hermie: It wasn't though. Scary: Wow, makin' a lot of progress here, Norm.

Anthony: I feel like the greed thing that comes up for Hermie is just every Batman villain shows up and he's like— 

Hermie: I wanna be them all! Oh! This is where I could— [all laughing] This is where I could finally be me– look, it's– it's– it's Condiment King, [Freddie laughing] and… Calendar Man!

Will: Clock Man. Anthony: Yeah. Uh–

Hermie: ManBat, [Beth laughing] Solomon Grundy. Oh!

Anthony: And he's just walking around and going—

Hermie: Ooh I could be everything I wanna be here! This is the ultimate stage for my Performances. Taylor: Hermie! Hermie!  Scary: Well guys guess the good news is we can just move on— [Anthony laughs]  —without having to worry about… Link: Yeah. Alright Hermie, you lock it down here. Hermie: Okay!  Normal: [shouts] No! Hermie: No problem!

Will: I grab Hermie and I say—

Normal: Hermie, the only person you need to be is yourself!

Anthony: He goes—

Hermie: [whisper] But whom is that? Normal: That's what you need to find out! And it really was you that I saw, that I thought it was you in the car! But—  Hermie: But it wasn't, it wasn't me though. Normal: It was, but I thought it was you and—  Hermie: But it wasn't. Normal: —you know, you're such a good actor and it could've been you! Taylor: Link, can you kick both of them? Link: H-Hermie, if this is the worst problem you two have in whatever this relationship is… [group laughter with claps] Then I think it's gonna, I think you two are going to be alright. So like, can we just.. move on?

Anthony: And he goes—

Hermie: [sighs] Fine. Fine–

Anthony: And he looks fondly at the rogues' gallery of Batman villains as he moves away from them and he goes—

Hermie: [inhale] He who makes a monster of himself, removes the pain of being a man. Link: Don't worry. Some of those villains are probably going to be in that last layer too. [Anthony laughs]

[hermanunworthy]

!DNDADS S2 EP36 SPOILERS!

alrighty! im writing this out in my notes app this time to make sure it doesnt all get deleted like last time: s2 ep36 thoughts! in real time! lets go!

- idc what the episode title or any other official stuff says, i am gonna say terri instead of terry for scary

- HERMIE HERMIE HERMIE HERMIE OH MY GODDDD IM ALREADY STIMMING SO HARD OMG OMG

- PLZ LET THE HERMIE X SCARY STUFF STOP PLZ I CANNOT TAKE THIS

- my arms hurt now. i got too excited. also my headphones need to charge DANG IT

- LINC HAS HAD THE SAME CONTACTS IN SINCE PAPA JOHNS??? and we thought hermie suffered the most /j

- oh god no ofc theres a drinking fact 😁😁

- IT IS NOW TIME. CUE THE GUNSHOTS

- idk WHY im drinking a soda during this im already jittery enough

- NORMAL GOT SHOT

- NOOOO THEY GOT A GARTOK BRACELET ON TJ?? well looks like the brainwash theory people were sorta right

- DOES THIS MEAN BARRY IS FREE NOW?? WHERE IS BARRY???

- how much do u wanna bet hermie isnt gonna get a turn.

- TERRI CALLING NORMAL HUBBY IS SO CURSED

- oh okay so tj is aware and not in like brainwashed mode okay good

- HERMIE!!!!

- "hermie is going to.. sulk. beth, it is ur turn" ANTHONY COME ON.

- TERRIS INTRODUCING HERSELF TO TERRY.....

- "what did u do to my scary?" WAAAA 😭😭

- LINCOLN OH NO

- IF BARRY FUCKING COMES BACK THIS EPISODE I WILL LOOOOSE MY SHIT

- okay is this not barrys earring thing?? is this collar a new one? idk ig this just doesnt have to do anything w barry lmao. i really wonder what happened to that guy though

- TERRI TALKING ABOUT HER DAD IN FRONT OF TERRY OW

- LINCOLN being the one to remember hermie wow how the tables have turned

- NOOOOOO I MADE A JOKE ABOUT HERMIE GETTING A CRUSH ON LINCOLN BEFORE DONT MAKE IT COME TRUE

- WHY IS HERMIE ABLE TO ACCEPT VALIDATION FROM EVERYONE EXCEPT NORMAL. KILL ME

- im gonna be sick.

- HERMIE NEEDING NORMAL TO BE A PART OF ANOTHER THROUPLE THIS IS SUS KID THIS IS SUS I KNOW WHAT U ARE

- ALSO HANG ON HANG ON HOLD UP. HOLD UP. DO WE NOW HAVE CANON BI (or at least mspec) HERMIE??? HOLY SHIT LETS GOOOO

- OAKWORTHY FANS HOW ARE WE FEELING??? IM VERY CONFUSED AS ALWAYS

- WE TECHNICALLY GOT G NOTED AGAIN EXCEPT ANTHONY WAS SINGING IN THE WRONG KEY LMAO

- ARE THEY JUST GONNA BE LIKE. MARRIED THE REST OF THE SEASON??? HELP

- TERRI HUGGED TERRY AAAUAGAHHH

- IM SO HAPPY HERMIE IS GETTING SM SCREENTIME WTF IS THIS

- OHHHH MY GOD I CANNOT WAIT TO DRAW SCARY HERMIE HOLY SHIT

- OH NO. I JUST REALIZED. TERRYS VISION.... THE SCARY HE SAW W THE TAPE MEASURER WAS ACTUALLY HERMIE WASNT IT. I LITERALLY FORGOT THAT TERRY IS ABOUT TO DIE.

- YALL. TERRY STEPHEN STAMPLER MARLOWE JR. FIRST KIDDAD TO DIE. ☹️

- WHO SHOT TERRY. WHO DID IT

- GRANT????? I ACTUALLY SCREAMED IM NGL I SCREAMED. WHAT THE FUUUUCK

- OKAY. OKAY. wow. okay

[intertexts]

GMORNING !!!!! u know what time it is

EPISODE 8 TRIVIA:

- the big monster they fought in the beginning was called a Crawling Apocalypse which looks like this. terrifying !!!

- bizly really liked that william banished it. he was originally not gonna let him do that but then "i realized your character can do so little and that was cool so i said fuck it" we love william pity points he is such a loser and he rolls so terribly <3

- they start talking about one piece because grizzlys saying things abt how certain parts of dakota are inspired by luffy and bizly goes "ive never watched anime" which is the biggest lie in the world

- grizzly: "yknow we were about an hour into the episode before i realized wow i havent done anything productive yet"

condi: "you just hit on vyncents mom for like 20 minutes!!!!"

- and then they start talking about how dakota and chip (bizlys pc from riptide) would either be best friends or hate each other which is really funny bc there are now MULTIPLE what if crossover episodes where they meet and interact and thats exactly the dynamic . i love them

- condi wasnt expecting his dad to be dead, he thought theyd have to fight him

- he kind of hesitated taking the sword !! vyncent doesnt really know how to feel about using something that belonged to his father

- he wasnt entirely Present for the part where his dad betrayed the party, he was sort of fading in and out of consciousness so theres a chance he didnt actually get the full picture. condi knows this out of character and vyncent knows it in the back of his mind somewhere that his dad might not actually be fully evil but hes too angry to come to terms with that yet

- hes struggling a lot with the fact that his mom.doesnt know about the betrayal. he doesnt want to tell her because "its not his fathers pride at stake, its his mother's memory of him" and that makes me so . :(

- THE GREATS!!!!!!!! THE GREATS ARE HERE i love the greats. surely nothing bad is happening to them

- they have a couple theories as to whats going on with the greats:

-- condi: theyre in this state because vyncent took too long getting them back here out of his head

-- condi: they were killed when they got transported to the other world and there was no way to get them back completely

-- charlie: something happened in the time where vyncent was transported to prime and the greats had died, so someone did something to keep them alive by putting them in his head. maybe they could only be kept alive by being in vyncents head

- grizzly tries to insight check bizly irl to see if any of their theories are close so far. this does not work . he rolled a 17 btw

- none of them trust minerva they think she might be secretly working with the lich. bizly defends her by saying "shes also in the middle of basically an apocalypse i think shes allowed to be a little mean to you"

- le frog is the only french person ever. this is brought up with NO context no explanation

- bizly is sharing some of the thumbnail art from youtube because this was right around the time the first few episodes were being put up publically !! most of them are just the same as the official refs but the most important one is le frog bc im not actually sure if youve seen his offical design yet . also tide used to be white. we dont have to talk about white tide

- bizly says pd feels more like a DC comic than a Marvel comic. hes right about this

- charlie starts talking about marissa meyer books and this is important 2 me because the lunar chronicles was an extremely formative piece of media for me . she apparently has a book called renegades thats superhero themed and i have not read it yet but i put it on my list specifically because of this. wahoo!

tgis is SUCH good trivia for this ep thank u dude... ouagh. really solid meal here. i love these last couple episodes so much.. there's so much fun stuff happening here i'm enjoying all of the greats stuff & getting like a solid Vyncent Moment for a while.

i LOVE the william pity points its great! it WAS cool as fuck!! also i gain +5 hp every time a gm goes "who give a shit if this isn't technically how the game mechanics should work, it's fun for everyone at the table & makes for something cool and makes sense narratively."

that being said. i DID take SO MUCH PSYCHIC DAMAGE from how long dakota spent hitting on his fucking mom. Please. Please king !!! sob.

I ALSO WAS EXPECTING THEM TO FIGHT VYN'S DAD???? still not unconvinced that some lich undead bullshit isn't going to happen with that. god i'm so invested in figuring out what HAPPENED there... i love this type of murder mystery situation. & i also was genuinely unsure if he would take the sword or not!! really kind of an ohhh shit! moment when he did. imo. vyncent virion sol i love u.... also it's still INCREDIBLY funny 2 me that he's still in his normal clothes. i have not forgotten that he is just doin his fantasy bullshit thing in the just some guy drip. (<- i might have forgotten something but i've been assuming they no longer have/wear Official Hero Drip since they're no longer really sanctioned or on great terms w/ them? also i've been assuming that the episode-specific clothes & shit isn't really permanent... now that im thinking about it though please tell me wiwi hardcore blue flame black leather kickass spiky biker jacket remains. it's too cool for him. but. still.)

I LOVE THE GREATS SO MUCH... i hope nothing permanently bad happens to them :( i like them so dearly..... you know they r really solid folks because they spent a YEAR and change living in a teenager's brain & came out of the experience still bein so nice 2 him.... augh. also in general big fan of the system-adjacent bullshit :] i love it when theres. guy with guys in his head. etc. will b sad ab their departure but i hope they r OKAY and return 2 Being Alive & shit!! nervous laughter. also god i can't wait to find out what Actually Happened with them. hhrhrghghgghh.

THIS IS SO TRUE ALSO???? free my girl minerva she did nothing but have Literally Normal Reactions to TERRIBLE things happening!!!

I DON'T LIKE THAT LEFROG FACT. it raises the question of is he actually even french or like, is there even a point of reference for his behavior. like. What is going on there. Horrifying thank you!!!! also man this entire degree im working on would be useless! well. maybe prime quebec exists. somehow. independently of a hypothetical europe. HIS DESIGN IS SO FUN BTW. its so cute.. i WAS kind of imagining a mutant Big Real Fucking Frog situation but i think this is a lot more reasonable. also literally ignoring white tide I Do Not See it. It Does Not Exist.

ALSO. NOT GOING TO START TALKING AB COMICS FOR EVEN MORE PARAGRAPHS. BUT. he is so so so right. (<- dc comics guy with Opinions. well. technically im not even much of a dc guy im just a vertigo guy. but. still.) hghghghbhgh.

[c3laniest4n]

𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝓅𝑒𝓇𝒻𝑒𝒸𝓉 𝑔𝒾𝓇𝓁~

𝒲𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈: 𝓅 𝒾𝓃 𝓋 𝓈𝑒𝓍, 𝒢/𝒫, 𝐵𝒥.

𝒪𝒯𝐻𝐸𝑅 𝒮𝒯𝒰𝐹𝐹𝒮: 𝒯𝒽𝑒𝓈𝑒 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝒩𝒪𝒯 𝓂𝓎 𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝒸𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓈, 𝐼 𝒶𝓂 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝒾𝓃𝓉𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓉𝑒𝒹 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒾𝓇 𝓇𝑒𝓁𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝐼 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝓀 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝒾𝓈 𝒽𝑜𝓌 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒾𝓇 𝓇𝑒𝓁𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓅 𝓌𝒶𝓈 𝐵𝐸𝐹𝒪𝑅𝐸 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝒽𝒶𝒹 𝒥𝓊𝓃𝑒.

𝐸𝒩𝒥𝒪𝒴𝒴 ☆～（ゝ。∂）

Inspired song:

C = Cory M = Melanie ??/? = unknown/side character C/T: Cory’s thoughts M/T: Melanie’s thoughts (The other voice is the narrator btw)

Today was the big volleyball game for Westvan Highschool. The varsity girls volleyball team was able to squeeze into the tournament between the other high schools. They just needed to win this ONE game to get in officially. One of the most popular players (and frankly the best player on the team) is Melanie, she is 18, really tall, bisexual, and a senior in high school- she was going for winning the tournament and getting a sports scholarship into a college so she could play for a college team in the future. Then there’s Cory, 18, really short, lesbian, a senior in high school, and a cheerleader for the volleyball team. Cory is obsessed with Melanie, ever since they first met in freshman year, she couldn’t take her eyes off of her. For a succubus, normally she would be into men, but instead she prefers women; Especially curvy, muscular, tall women, with huge knockers (HOT DAMN.). Melanie had broken up with her toxic ex boyfriend, who only wanted sex- and of course popularity in school, and he made her do his homework and help him cheat on tests and exams so he could have good grades. Now Melanie sees Cory as somewhat of a crush- she’s more into women that are thick, curvy, big tits, small, and have a fat ass (AAAAAAAAA.) which makes Cory the perfect girl.

M: Hey coach? I’m feeling a bit nervous about the first tournament game- is there anything you can recommend I do to de-stress? I need to make sure I can play perfectly on Friday. Plus it’s bugging me when I’m trying to study!

Coach Sarah: I mean, maybe just get some more sleep? Don’t drink coffee as much, and drink some warm tea throughout the day. It helps me a lot!

M: ok- I’ll try it! Thanks coach!

*time skip: wednesday*

M/T: Jeez, I’m still stressed out- AAAAUUHHHHHH! maybe I should talk to one of my old cheerleader friends!

*she walks into the girl’s locker room, and finds Cory changing in front of her locker. She blushes as she sees her only with her bra on and her cheer skirt-*

C: I can see you in my locker mirror, you know.

M: AAAA! I’m sorry! I wasn’t spying or anything! I just wanted to come talk to you!

C: Sure! I mean- we haven’t spoken in a while- heh-

M: Yeah-

C: so- uh- what’s the matter? You look stressed-

M: that’s the problem- no matter what I do it doesn’t go away. Im always thinking about the game and I cannot perform well if I’m feeling like this! What do you suggest I do?

C: well, I’m not really a stressful person, so when it comes to this I’m not sure what to tell you-

M/T: maybe if I was able to see under that cheer top then I would feel better- AAAUHGHH! WHY AM I THINKING THAT!? I JUST GOT OUT OF A RELATIONSHIP 6 MONTHS AGO- WHAT AM I DOING-

*melanie blushes*

C/T: OMG I NEVER THOUGHT SHE WOULD TALK TO ME AGAIN! WOW FUCK SHE IS SO HOT- WAIT NO- HORNY GO AWAY AAAAAAAAAUGHHH!

*they stare at eachother for a bit (sexual tension haha lmao)*

M: Heh- fuck- uh- is it getting hot in here?

C: I think it’s just you~

C/T: OH MY GOD WHY DID I SAY THAT WTF!?!?!

M: Oh! Heh- well uh- I better get going- uhm- heh-

C/T: THIS IS YOUR CHANCE CORY TAKE IT DAMMIT!

C: n-no! I- uh- I know a way I can relieve your stress!

M: really?

C: Hmm~ well I sure hope it will~ only if you want to though~

*pins Melanie on the bench blushing*

M/T: I WASNT EXPECTING THAT- OMG OMG OMG IM ACTUALLY ABOUT TO HAVE SEX- IM STILL A VIRGIN!

C: S-sorry! This is awkward- I just felt the tension and I felt I had to do something heh-

M: Nah- it’s ok- I was feeling the tension too-

C: thanks I guess- that makes it a little less embarrassing-

*Cory sits up and sits closer to Melanie’s waist*

M/T: SHIT- WHAT DO I DO- WHAT IF SHE FINDS OUT I HAVE A-

M: B-back up a bit, p-please! H-haah~

C: Okayyy-? Is everything alright?

M/T: Ahhh~ oh fuck im so hard~ this isn’t helping! Shit shit shit!

M: Y-yes- a-ahhh~

C: *chuckles* I haven’t even touched you yet silly!

*Cory goes back to sitting in her original spot, wiggling around more because she’s giggling*

M: S-stop! P-please don’t laugh! Mnnn~

C: Melanie what’s going o-

C/T: What is that poking me. No way- whatever-

C: how about we skip to the good part?

*kisses Melanie and they take their clothing off except for undergarments*

C: ok- let’s have a bit of fun ~ how about we make eachother take of one article of clothing in order for the other to take of one of theirs. Like “I’ll do this if you do this”.

M/T: This is all going downhill- I’m so fucked- she’s going to hate me!

M: ok!

C: how about- if you take off your undershorts- I’ll take off my panties, and my bra.

M; H-heh! U-uh maybe s-something else!

C: ok- if I take off my panties you don’t have to do anything-?

M: sounds good to me~

*bites her lip and blushes. Cory shifts closer to Melanie’s crotch*

M: Aaa-ahh!~

C: hmm? Sensitive there huh?~ how about we investigate what’s under there~

M: *she puts her hands over her undershorts* N-Nope! H-heh!

C: Come on Mel- it’s not like you have a di- *pulls down Melanie’s briefs*

*cory blushes and just sits there staring*

M/T: THATS IT IM SO FUCKING DONE FOR.

M: p-please don’t judge me- I understand if you want to stop now-

C: may I?

M: what?

*cory pulls down Mel’s briefs more*

M: O-Oh! Uhm- ok!

M/T: WHATS GOING ON AAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEE

*cory puts her cock in her mouth, slowly moving up and down with her mouth.*

M: S-shit~ ah~

C: *gag* I-is this ok?~

M: mhm!~ y-yes please!~

*cory starts to go faster, pre-cum leaking from her hardened rod*

C/T: Oh fuck… it’s so big- I can’t even fit this damn thing in my mouth! Well- at least I can fit it somewhere else- I think.

*cory swallows, sighs and looks up at melanie. She moves up loser to her*

M: w-wait what are you-

*cory slowly lets her dick sink into her tight hole*

M: aah!~ o-oh fuck!~

C: O-Ow! Ah!~

*melanie notices her bleeding*

M: O-oh! It’s your first time too! U-uh! Here! *bites Cory’s ear* (it helps ease the pain lmao I’m a nerd-)

C: oh god~ s-sorry~ I should’ve told you~

M: it’s ok! At least I knew what to do-! Do you want to keep going?

C: Y-yes~

*cory starts out slowly going up and down- tears of pain and pleasure rolling down her cheeks, as Melanie wipes them away*

C/T: Lets go faster~

M: W-what are you d-doing!? A-ah!~

C: H-Hah!~ Y-you’re so sensitive, eh?~ How about we go even faster~

M: N-No!~ Cory, please! Somebody’s gonna hear us!

C: so what?~

M: WE WILL GET IN ALOT OF TROUBLE! I COULD GET KICKED OFF THE TEAM! YOU COULD GET KICKED OFF OF THE CHEER TEAM TOO!

C: Atleast we will have eachother though~ but, we both know that won’t happen, because I’ll make sure we don’t get caught~

M: Oh yeah- how? F-fuck~

C: Pfft- we’ll just finish fast and we will be out of here before the cheer and dance team comes to change~

M: When is that?

C: in 7 minutes~

M: WHAT?! THATS CRAZY I CANT FINISH IN 7 MINUTES! WE’RE SO DEAD!

C: You should stop worrying~ just let me do all the work~ I won’t let us get caught I promise~

M: C-Cory please don’t~ I will be too loud! Don’t make me cum! I-I don’t even have protection on!

C/T: She keeps stalling! I’ll just have to do this- I don’t really have another option other than stopping- which I am NOT doing~

C: Well, suck it up then~ I’m not stopping~

*cory speeds up her pace yet again, rapidly bouncing up and down on Melanie, skin on skin echoing throughout the girl’s locker room.*

M: C-Cory!~ fuck!~ mnn~

C: Come on baby~ please~

M: h-hah~ how much t-time?

C: 6 minutes~ mmphhh~

M/T: God dammit Cory! Ugh~ am I really going to have to do this now?~ I hope she doesn’t mind-

C: M-Melanie- what are you- *melanie pins her down on the bench and starts absolutely pounding in her* AAAH! MELANIE!~

M: Sorry love!~ pleaseeee~ aaaah~ how much time?~

C: F-FOUR M-M-MINUTES-S-S-S-A A-AHH! MELANIE!~ AAHHH!~ MNN!~

M: Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck~

M/T: Why isn’t it working!? I have to go faster! Sorry Cory!

C: MELANIE PLEASE~ FUCK ME!~

M: I am love!

M/T: Fuck im sweating more than I do in my volleyball games- dammit~ fuck Cory~ thank god I’m so sensitive otherwise I wouldn’t finish this fast~

M: How much time baby?

?/?: *indistinct talking getting closer*

M: *whispers* Cory! Shh! They’re here! Quick let’s go into the showers!

*she carries Cory while still in her-*

M/T: Fuck! This is so bad! What am I gonna do! I can’t just leave her like this- she’ll think I’m a big jerk! Augh! What other choice do I have?!

M: C-Cory- I need to go- now.

*she pulls out and gets dressed*

C: w-what?~

M: I-I- im Sorry! Please, I don’t want to get caught!

*she runs out of the shower stall, leaving Cory, feeling guilty as hell. She bumps into the cheer team, who starts asking where Cory is.*

M: I- I think she’s in the showers! Gotta go!

??/?: weird girl- volleyball practice ended 2 hours ago-

C/T: M-maybe I don’t mean as much to her as volleyball team… I can’t stop loving her though- and DAMN she had a huge cock!

M/T: Fuck I shouldn’t have done that- I’m such a jerk! I could’ve had the chance of dating her too! She was just- the perfect girl~

Part 2 soon~

[robynbaldurlogs]

baldur log day 3

TODAY WAS THE WORST DAY OF MY FUCKING LIFE!!!!! OHHH MY GOD. IM SO MAD. ok. im exaggerating but. ill get to that. so lets just go through the first couple things that happened. heres the squad. say hi intrepid heroes

so i talked to zevlor and agreed to find the goblin leader. on my way to the goblin camp i meet these people who talk about the absolute and call me a true soul after their brother dies lol.

then they say theyre looking for a survivor from the ship crash, i say i am one and..

they... wanna kill me...??? i really didnt want to but i was already in the fight so im like. whatever. sure man. so i cooked the shit out of them, duh. im curious about what their deal was though... also i had the option to ask if they knew about halsin the healer and i didnt ask which sucks cus i should have done that first also im... starting to catch on to what astarion is. if im assuming correctly. cus earlier he talked about how much he looooves rare ass meat thats "dripping" with blood and that was weird as a random comment but...

Ok. I Know What You Are.

anyways. then i meet this dog by his dead owner. befriend him. all good.

but then. i use speak to animals (with wyll) and talk to the dog. and wanting to help i yell at the corpse. because im like. I DUNNO MAN. maybe the dog will realize hes dead. but then HE GETS MAD AT ME AND TURN COMBAT MODE COMES ON. and i tried to go back and reload. i didnt want to but i also did not want to kill him. but the save was so far back. then i tried to run away with astarion but i guess running away works per character. so i thought oh maybe if i return the fight will be over.... and it wasnt....

i have never regretted something more. ohhhh i am going to show you so much love and compassion when i run this game a second time. this is the worst thing to happen to me. ever. fuck everything. i still love you scratch.

...anyways. got to the goblin camp. used a wisdom roll to convince the goblins we're good thanks to the brain tadpole. astarion commented on how we could convince anyone to do anything with the tadpoles and he was like mweheheeheh.

but of course i agree with shadowheart. cus shes goated. also id agree with that if it wasnt her either way. (ignore her looking like a swedish twink. i used disguise self and forgot to change her back) oh also we leveled up right before this hell yes

but ya then my friend speves reminded me to go back to that gate in the beginning of the game that was locked. so i went there and unlocked it with astarion. fucked up like twice but hey man its a dc 20 okay. im lucky i had vampirical fuck with me or ida never unlocked it

but yeah i went into the crypt, looted some stuff and killed a couple people. nothing bad happened in the first room and i did not have to reload.

embarrassing as fuck but yeah then i intimidated the guys outside to leave

and shadowheart said i was more cunning than i looked.... wow. thank u. im flattered. but yeah relatively short session i havent even found halsin or met karlach yet but hopefully i get that done next time. ive got a test tomorrow so im gonna fuck off and study hell yeah bitches

[theosconfessions]

if youd like to read the stephens from the beginning you can over here:)

if youd like to read the stephens continued you can over here :)

@ohsosims

theo- well at least you have a job, i guess.

blake- mr kline? can i help you find something or ?

theo-mmm actually no. just here to talk.

blake- talk?

theo- yeah talk. you have a minute or ?

blake- not really?? im sorry did i do something wrong or?

theo- not yet. at least i dont think. riv told me about you two.

blake- oh. oh.

theo- and with that being said im well aware of your..hobbies

blake- sir? i mean i play football?

theo- thats not what i mean and you know that. you KNOW exactly what im talking about here.

blake- i mean i guess.

theo- you have any kids, blake?

blake- im? im sorry where is this going?

theo- do you have any kids, blake. that you know about?

blake- [blinks] um is this a question river wanted to know more about or are you just being nosey?

theo- watch your mouth

blake-right sorry. i have a daughter. but river knew that. long before we ever did anything. i wasnt hiding anything from him.

theo- and you still involved with the mother at all?

blake- she lives across the country,no. it was young,dumb, love . not that i regret my daughter but its not idea. the situation. not great. work here for child support payments. see my daughter in the summer.

theo- and how does that happen? mother flies out here with her or?

blake- no my parents go above and beyond . go get her.

theo- you dont?

blake- better that way. we dont mix well anymore.

theo- whys that?

blake- because i slept with her friend.

theo- i see. ive done that

blake- im aware. seen your seasons.

theo- right.

blake- mr kline is there a reason why youre asking me all of this?

theo- you have any more kids rivers not aware of ? any chance you think you could not be aware of them yourself?

blake- um no? im pretty careful.

theo- you use protection with them?

blake- some of them.

theo- you use protection with river?

blake- no

theo- then youre not pretty careful. youre careless. i cheated on myhusband fifteen years ago and ended up bringing back something that coudlve fucked his life up. luckily it only got me.

blake- oh.

theo- blake, listen. river lieks you. i think he takes after his dad too much but hey. i can only control him so much,right? warn him so much. hes going to fuck up regardless.

blake- and you think im the fuck up?

theo- i think you have a potential to be a big mistake he makes yeah.

blake- wow. i like river,sir. a lot. always have

theo- i get that. thats just words, kid. i mean this shit ..its like looking at my younger self just a little bit more of a pussy.

blake- whoa.

theo- just saying if you have any intention on being serious with my son you better show him actions, kid. because i swear to GOD if he comes home and he tells me his boyfriend got some bitch pregnant..

blake- yessir. i wont. i really do like him

theo- k good. love this song.

blake- um?

[cubedmango]

Hey naina, tried to rewatch the cherry magic movie tonight. Got up to the nagasaki scene. It’s currently paused,,, I have cried genuinely. non stop since I pressed play? My head hurts really badly I think. I’m gonna try again tomorrow I hope you’re having a lovely day

(other ask under the cut for length)

KUROSAWA SAYING WHEN YOU DIDN’T TURN TO ME I WAS SAD AND THAT ONE FUCKIN TEAR THAT FALLS FROM HIS EYES AND THE WAY HE LAUGHS AND APOLOGISES FOR BEING A MESS I NEED A NURSE like i’m gonna. Die i’m two seconds away from throwing up my heart why would he. Why did they film a movie with such intent to tear me to the ground the way he can barely speak and has to try and gather himself multiple times with deep breaths before speaking and ends up crying anyway the way adachi looks on helplessly wondering how to comfort him and let him know how much he loves him the way. The way he tries to bridge the gap between them with understanding through touch one of kurosawa’s main love languages the way kurosawa’s eyes are so glossy and doe like as he waits for adachi’s kiss the way he says his name so softly the way adachi rests his hand on kurosawa’s knee and their hands find each other so slowly…, so softly… so tenderly… the way they can literally speak 636373 words with just their hands alone and do way more for the sake of romance and true deep mutual love than anything the way none of these are in order of how they happen because my brain is seeping out of my ears naina what the actual fuck were they thinking..,, machida keita akaso eiji and kazam hiroki you will receive my medical bills shortly i’m. I wow so. cool

PLEASE IM CRYING KFJHSDKFHDSJF ALL OF THIS IS SO REAL??????? cm crew put Smth into the nagasaki scene idk what but its insane like i will never Not be feral when i think abt it ...... kurosawas breakdown is so painful to see hes been holding everything back for So Fucking Long and imagining all the events from his perspective is crazy like think abt it. he has no idea if adachis ok or not and none of his calls go through and theyre so far apart like Imagine . the fact he wasnt like full on bawling in that scene means hes still holding back so much probs for adachis sake its so aaarhrrhGHGFGHF!!!!!!! LET HIM CRY MORE PLEASE.......

adachis side was perfectly analyzed in that meta i rbed earlier so i have nothing substantial to add but god for the 58302th time his Growth ..... even in ep 12 he had to get that push from tsuge to go meet w kurosawa but in the movie he could already tell kurosawa was putting up a front (and literally predicted it would happen as soon as he got the transfer offer) and he probs planned on talking abt it when he flied back to tokyo before the incident which is. ... .. and the look of determination on his face the entire time kurosawa finally broke down w no panic no overthinking like "I Am Going To Love And Cherish This Man So Hard" and comforting kurosawa w touch and no longer caring abt the magic that hes become reliant on for kurosawas sake. . Yeah im going to be ill about these two for the rest of my life thank u cm crew god bles <3

[djinn-ale]

Heavy breathing I SEE STARBEE AND I NEED HEADCANONS THEY FRENS SHJHHHF

LMAO HIII um im not actually a starbee shipper nor am i really a headcanons haver 😅 HOWEVER i am a huge fan of whatever the fuck was going on with their exrid almost-friendship-mutual-i-need-to-fix-him ghost bee arc dynamic so i do have some thoughts on them under the cut if u are interested. as for headcanons i have exactly one (1) and its this:

t4t? nah. tvt (they fight behind maccadams at 4 pm every week)

i need to preface this by saying i absolutely hate what the autobots stand for in idw1 and i despise rid2012 with a passion, especially for how they wrote bee (autobot regime police brutality sweep??????????????). despite this, i am incredibly delusional and so i pretend that what happened isnt real. also it's been awhile since i read/skimmed through any tf comics, so i could be misremembering things or forgetting events, so take my opinion with a grain of salt.

first of all i think they probably had a lot of issues with each other over the whole leadership thing. like, imagine being the guy whose own worst enemy is his leader, and has fought his entire life throughout the war to usurp him and take over his faction. like youve got so much goddamn beef with this guy and you hate everything he stands for and he hates you and you've suffered so much at this guy's hands, and after so many years, through your own scheming and plotting and killing you're able to stand at the top of cybertron as its leader!! and then in strolls the guy from the opposite faction who is The Optimus Prime Numero Uno guy, and in case that wasnt enough, he was literally handed the leadership role on a silver platter. somehow he doesnt even want the role - thinks he's too unprepared for it or some shit. idk, i just think that theres a lot of foil potential here that was missed, and instead bee was just reduced to the guy cracking various "im dead" jokes while nitpicking every single action starscream took. sure there was some back and forth between the two with morality and Why Didn't You Just Do The Right Thing and whatnot, and their bantering was fun (especially the part where bee actually disappears for a bit after screamer tells him to fuck off) but i think it couldve gone a lot deeper, and a lot more personal. what im trying to say here is that it's Very Bumblebee to try and fix literally the worst guy he knows (barring prowl), but realistically i dont think he wouldve done much to change 4 million years of habits and flaws and the 50 mental illnesses starscream had built up (if anything, starscream mightve taken the actions bee "convinced him to" regardless of what was said - remember how he kept convincing himself that bee was just "his own guilty conscience" - meaning that everything bee says is something he already thinks about, whether subconsciously or not). instead, starscream shouldve been able to convince bee to stop parasocialing op. like, i know bee being op's Most Son Ever and his belief in op being infallible is one of his biggest character flaws, but it wouldve been really cool and awesome character growth for bee to be like Wow, i actually dont think op shouldve annexed the earth that one time in the name of the matrix or whatever.

tldr if starbee was more mentally ill they wouldve been closer to each other. and also hated each other more. and then canon wouldve been so much more enjoyable to me.

[nikasholistic]

You said somewhere in your ask about relationship advice that “very often the perfect relationship comes when you're not actively looking for it.” I have always believed that but I just want to ask your view about something that happened to my love life that’s like both in harmony to that saying and is like a contradictory at the same time. So a little back story, last year I used to go to this guy’s live on TikTok, he’s tiktok famous, his videos are all about his thoughts about love, relationships, his past heartbreaks and everything about romantic relationship. At first I never had any initial serious intentions, I wasnt even that much attracted to him, but he is a pretty guy, fine as fuck, enough reason for me to flirt with him every time he would go live, I was always on the comment throwing compliments and corny pick up lines 😂 but I wasn’t deep into anything, I was just doing it for fun and maybe out of boredom. during those times never in my mind that I assumed that he’d see me as a separate girl that would standout or be noticeable from the other girls that would shoot their shot/flirt with him on his live… because he is really that attractive, that he is so used to girls always flirting with him. Looking back, I just realized I was consistently actively supporting him for like 3 months… until I stopped going to his live, maybe I got bored and tired of it, I didn’t go to his live for maybe another 3 months. Then one time he crossed my mind, I checked his tiktok account and he deactivated it, I was wondering what happened, I went through his IG, and he posted on his story a quote “trust actions not words”. Then days after he reactivated his account, I caught his live and hopped on it, I typed something, he went silent when he noticed my name popped up, then he said “you didn’t come to my live for 3 years” (can hear the pain in his voice) I was so surprised 😮 (((in my mind, the 3 months I was gone felt like 3 years for him?!?!?!😭😭😭))) and then he said more things to me that made me realize he was waiting and looking for me the whole time that I was gone, and as soon as I came to a realization that I was on his mind for 3 months, it felt like I was in heaven for a moment 😂😭💕 I also found out the reason he deactivated his TikTok account was because I stopped going to his live.. so basically, HE CAUGHT FEELINGS 😂😭 flirting for fun literally turned into feelings 😂😂😂 this is the part where I want to understand what you said about finding love when u don’t actively look for it, Because it’s like I was doing all that flirting but I was detached to any outcome, it was like I was applying pressure but I had no attachment to any expectations, I was just giving love freely but I wasn’t trying to pursue him, it appeared like I was “chasing” but I really had no goal to make him fall inlove. I was just putting love out there, and I didn’t expect all the love I gave would comeback to me stronger than what I put out. It all started and happened last year and he is still attached to me. I went from watching his videos talking about love, to now being the subject of his videos 😂😭😂😭 can u please explain how the law of attraction/law of detachment applied on this situation cause 😂

Wow, that's so cool. I think what happened is you focused all your energy on him and also was sending out the energy of love, so you got in your reality the circumstances that matched this energy. You just had this state of being of giving love without attachment. We always get what we are, because reality is our mirror. And I think you also were focusing on this guy a lot during his lives, so it's almost like you set this unconscious intention to make him notice you, and it worked. 😀✨