#wow i cringed a lot while reading this

[idk-i-want-mcl-content]

in other news, i was waiting in line to buy a subway and started thinking about mcl again (as one does) and I ended up thinking more about how my candy and Jason would interact, and TLDR: it gave me an idea: What if I make my Candy to appear as if, at the start, she would have been a better fit for Goldreamz? Like she acts really cold in a profesional setting because of her bad experiences at EPMC but eventually, she ends up warming up to her coworkers. read below if you'll like to see my candy and her intj shenanigans.

As the player, I find Jason to be a really interesting and entertaining character, I think he's really charming, but if I met him? hell nah, leave me alone Mendal. So, I thought, what about my Candy being annoyed/indifferent at best to him and literally just. completely ignoring him at worst? I imagine the reason why she left EPMC was not because she was dating her boss (for my purposes I'm abandoning that storyline but it's cool) but because her colleagues were extremely unfair to her, and it was not necessarily the work that was exhausting her but more so having to deal with the people around her. I think she has deal plenty with people similar to Jason, in the form of egotistical people who think they are above everyone and if you don't agree then you are a fool. And because of that, when Jason attempts at the start to try and make her play games she's just straight up not buying it. When they met in ep 2 I think she would be polite to him, maybe even thinking that he's going to be a competent competitor BUT the moment he starts bickering with Devon and Roy she would be like no thanks <3 and would resort to appear indifferent to Devon and Roy about the matter, which might not be the best and for Jason, well you know him he wants to get in your mind as quick as possible. But, just because she appears like that doesn't mean her blood isn't boiling and she's just holding herself back to tell Jason to stfu. I think she would tell him to stop interrupting the client and would put emphasis on "we came here for the client, not for you" and of course, Jason would tease as he does in the game telling her "oh, so you are the one in charge now? you should tell the same to your coworkers then, it seems Roy didn't get that memo" (or something like that, I'm not Jason but yk) and Roy wouldn't appreciate that, to say the least. After that, when Jason tells her at the end how sorry he is that he's going to steal this project from them, she'll simply tell him results will tell and I think this indifference is what can make Jason feel annoyed lol. When the event is done and Jason CONTINUES to tell them that their project was not good enough, I'll like for her to tell him something similar to the game. In ep 3 she sees Jason at the mall but just walks past him lol and in ep 4 I think i'm going to make her be like dude, I don't think it's our bussiness to know who Jason sleeps with yk, which will spark a little debate between her and Thomas (he's her crush but they aren't interested in each other at this point, but they are in good terms) AND i think, if Jason hears her and then he continues talking, if it's canon that he gets her phone number, he definitely would start to imply for her to change companies again. And Brune saying "oh wow, what a coincidence that now that she's here, Jason is too. Almost as if he's following her" would NOT help her ass💀💀💀 I think Amanda would be more suspicious of her, and both have a little bit of a strained relationship as coworkers (for now) sooo yk, it's almost as if my candy's on thin ice from the start lol then for ep 5 i feel like they would meet a different side of her (if I end up sticking her in the same position as the canon Candy, which idk, i would like for her to either work on graphic design OR on finances but whatev), in this version I imagine she chose Devon to work with and the others, seeing that Devon is pleased they probably would relax a bit more about her switching companies and be more trusfull of her for ep 6 i want my candy to be with her roommate, I imagine Devenementiel talking about the fair and she's like besties no, I've already have plans with some friends (she does ballet, she's going with those friends + her roommate who is her bestie) BUT, just when she was about to leave with her roommate, Roy saw them and invited them again, which worked. And because she has her best friend here, she feels a little bit more at ease and starts to show her personality a little bit more.

[13eyond13]

.

[writingforatwistedworld]

A request...

Dunno if this has been done already but A self aware Azul, Trey, and Lilia reacting to the player saying they "had a bad day but seeing them made it much better".

Let me know if this is confusing and you're free to not answer of course

Self-aware au

I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, obsessive behavior, unhealthy behavior, mentions of blood, mentions of war, death, bad cringe humor bc I haven't written for a while

Trey Clover/ Azul Ashengrotto/Lilia Vanrouge-"Seeing you made my day better!"

Oh, are you alright?

The second you returned to them, Trey could tell that something was wrong with you

A bad day perhaps?

If he could talk to you he would sit you down to talk about what (or who) ruined your day (whilst secretly planning their demise but pshh)

But then you suddenly stare at the screen and drop something like that at him? Whew... I-I think he is swooning

He almost forgets that you are having a horrible time before all of this until he finally sees you having a strained expression once more before going off

Oh ok. This is fine. This is totally fine. Haha... TOTALLY FINE

Like, imagine my mans expression

He feels honored that you feel and think that way about him but at the same time...

Bro over here can't really help

He tries to be as present as possible after that

(Toatally not like a cat throwing itself on your lap for attention)

In his mind, the more present he is the better you feel

(Not like peeps play games to escape reality but sure, if Trey wants to see himself as your emotional aspirin then sure)

But perhaps his attention really helped, perhaps something good just happened that got you in a good mood

So when you finally said that seeing him made your day so much better it felt like the sun was peeking out from behind the clouds after a long storm

Well, luckily he didn't need to conspire with Draconia to get you here anymore

But then again, if what you said was true then him being with you would keep you happy all the time, right?

Oh what he does for his go-I mean his uncrowned ruler

This brings back a lot of dark memories for him

And I mean that literally

His memories of these days are filled with him sitting in a dark corner of his little pot

Only with the difference that for him his ray of light was food, for you it… is whatever this is

It does surprise him though

You, the high scholar, wisest of the wise, were more human than he imagined you to be

Well, to be fair, it was easy to imagine you as that unfeeling being that hovered over all of them

Day after day did the octopus see you do whatever you came to do and then go again

Although… you always made sure to check on him whilst having that faint smile on your face

How sweet. Doesn’t make him worry any less though

Until one day you finally tell him that seeing him made your day better

Wow… how is he supposed to react to that?

His inspiration for everything he does sees him in that light

This totally won’t get to his now. Naw. I have no idea what you are talking about

Continue to tell him that. Tell him how much his presence makes you happy

And if you should look in the direction of some unfortunate NPC that unknowingly made you laugh he will see red

Interesting, his cane looks a bit red as well. The handle area should be cleaned again… why is it so sticky?

Lilia is not amused

Sleep deprived, yes, but not amused

Oh why that? Well, this father decided to pray even more to you in order to cheer you up

Now, if you know anything about Lilia in this au then you also know how religious he is, so him praying even more? Uh… perhaps he gets two hours of sleep at best

You are his god so surely you hear his words, asking you why your expression is always so sad, so exhausted

STOP SHARPENING YOUR SWORD YOU OLD BAT THERE IS NO NEED TO START A HOLY WAR IN THE OVERSEERS NAME WTF MADE YOU EVEN THINK OF THAT SOLUTION??!

Anyways, if Lilia is not in a good mood, so is entire Diasomnia. He is more or less the dorms old and wise fairy grandmother who hands out advice like lollipops so when he is not in a good mood, so is nobody else

No matter what the local group of non-violent military trained guys do, they just can’t cheer up their usually oh so happy teacher and guide

Lilia reminds the NPCs of the dorm of a certain general they read about in the history books (but there is no way that could be Lilia)

Until one day he walks in like he is in a romance anime, looking up with sparkling eyes to the altar and thanking your statue for your favor

If this was any other dorm, he would have been send to the school therapist (oh yeah, they have a shrimp instead of that)

When asked by his son what happened Lilia just looks up, still with that weird look in his eyes, tells him that “I have finally been noticed by our grace”

Malleus is telling Sebek in the meantime to call for a doctor because it seems like their general just lost his last few marbles

What really happened was Lilia heads down dangling from who knows where, perhaps the cafeteria chandelier, and asking himself what could have made you so sullen the last few days

Until suddenly you zipped in, looked at him (probably once up to his knees and then down to his head whilst saying “Mhm. Looks good.”) and were like “Seeing you made my day better.”

That was the moment when Lilia lost his grip on the metal and fell face-first, thankfully it was already late so no one was present but if I got a coin every time he fell like that I would have one, which tells us how rarely that happens

How about you go to whatever NPCs that govern the other countries and warn them that there is a high low-key mad general who would start would annihilation if you so much as feel slightly sluggish

You know those people who need to hear compliments constantly so they don't go bananas? Yeah

Whoops. Seems like you complimented the uniform of Octavinelles uniforms after seeing one of their NPCs. Wonder what happened to that guy. He isn't attending his classes anymore, that's for sure

[honnelander]

surprises

WOW OK i can't believe i did this!! i needed a small break from my writer's block with Sanji and wanted to try my hand at another opla character that i find really interesting! and cute i'm sorry this was a lot of fun to write and i enjoyed the change of pace so i hope you enjoy! if you want to be tagged in any of my work, please read this

gif credit @zsuo

WARNINGS: none

word count: 2k

pairing: opla!buggy x reader

summary: reader is on 'clown duty' on the Going Merry while the crew searches for Nami, but the more you talk with Buggy, the more you realize you like him.

masterlist

taglist: @yarnnerdally @miloonmetis @fa1rybubbl3z @feelinmatcha @buggy0827 @uncomfortableshoelace @notasgard @deserticwren @shadydeanmuffin @ohsilk @antrenna @laviiv

Ok, you’ll admit it, you’ll finally admit it. You were finally going to admit to yourself the tiny, stupid, and annoying thought that has been plaguing the back of your mind for days now: 

You thought the clown was hot. 

Even saying that small, little sentence to yourself in your mind made you cringe and want to smack yourself into next week. 

You thought the clown was attractive? Buggy the freaking clown? Buggy, the flashy fool? Buggy, the... what, something-something jester? The guy that constantly wore that silly circus make up all the time, so you didn’t really know what his face even looked like exactly? The person who rivaled Usopp in always having the most shit to say? It was ridiculous.  

What was even worse, was the fact that he was just a head at this point, he wasn’t even a full person with a body. You had no idea what the rest of him looked like and you hated the fact that you were just so god damn curious to find out. It was embarrassing- you were attracted to a literal talking head! 

Apparently though, the rest of the crew had said, sans Sanji since you both had joined Luffy’s crew at the same time, that this Buggy guy was bad news. Why exactly? You didn’t really know, but it had something to do with Buggy attempting to drown Luffy to obtain the map to the Grand Line and decimating a town a couple of weeks ago. 

But it looked like that warning of ‘Buggy is dangerous’ had turned into ‘Buggy is just annoying’ since all he was now, at this point in time, was just a talking head that never seemed to shut up. That talking head, however, was your crew’s only ticket to find a rogue Nami so you all had no choice but to put up with his antics. 

“Can’t you just tell us where Arlong is?” you asked the clown head offhandedly one morning out on deck as you sharpened your daggers. “Without, you know, all the theatrics?”  

“God,” Buggy groaned, rolling his eyes to the heavens. “Are you deaf or are you just stupid?” he asked exasperatedly as his head hopped around and turned to face you. “For the millionth time- I can’t just tell you where Arlong is. My powers don’t work like that. I’m not a compass or a map.” 

“Well, actually, you kind of are, aren’t you?” you asked curiously with an eyebrow raised, not put off by his rude tone. “I mean, think about it,” you started, pointing the tip of your dagger to look at him. “You could like, ‘leave’ a toe or something anywhere you wanted to remember a certain thing or place, and you could then just... sense where to go to get it back. Exactly like a map.” You were silent for a minute as you went back to sharpening the blade. “But I guess you already did that, right? Since that’s how you found Luffy at the Baratie?” you asked with a thoughtful hum. 

“Wow,” Buggy laughed condescendingly. “You’re a real sharpshooter, aren’t you? Thanks for that master analysis, captain obvious. What do you think I’m doing right now?” 

The corner of your mouth twitched upwards. “Acting like a map to get your body back,” you answered without hesitation and a twinge of smugness. “Maybe you should be called ‘Buggy the Map’ instead. It has a nice ring to it.” 

The clown’s patronizing smile dropped, his expression deadpanning. “Haha, very funny,” Buggy said in a humorless voice. “And here I thought you weren’t anything more than just a pretty face.” 

Your eyes darted to him, quickly scanning over his expression to see if he was seriously calling you pretty or if he was just joking. When you saw no hint of sincerity in his green eyes (wow they were pretty), you cleared your throat and refocused your attention back onto your blade.  

“Yeah, well, I’m full of surprises actually,” you said matter-of-factly without thinking, your mouth having a mind of its own. Your eyes widened slightly, your line of sight not budging from your dagger as your hand running along the blade stilled for a second.  

Were you flirting with Buggy?

Were you insane? 

Buggy’s attention was already wandering but at your choice of words, his eyes snapped right back to your face. For once in his life, he was at a loss for words. “Uh... ok?” He blinked. “Like what?” 

You felt your cheeks flush slightly, running your sharpening stone along the blade at a quicker pace. “Wouldn’t you like to know.” 

The clown furrowed his eyebrows, scrunching up his face in confusion as he looked at you. He felt like he had entered the Twilight zone or something.  

“Uh, yeah. You’re the one who brought it up, sweet cheeks,” he said as he watched you intently focus on your task at hand. Buggy then quirked an eyebrow as he added in snooty tone, “Well, whatever ‘surprise skills’ you have can’t possibly be knife sharpening because you’ve been working on that same blade all morning.” 

Shit. He was right, you realized. You had been out here longer than you initially thought and had been working on the same dagger ever since you sat down with him.  

In a quick attempt to hide your embarrassment at being called out, you swiftly sat up and stabbed the tip of your small blade into the wooden barrel next to where his head was. “Watch your mouth clown!” 

But Buggy didn’t even flinch. “Pfft, nice try sweetheart,” he scoffed. “But blades don’t scare me. I’m immune to cuts, remember? I’m literally just a head right now.” 

Crap. He got you. Again. You leaned back in your seat, pulling out your other blade to sharpen.  

“Oooo, another dagger, huh?” he asked with feigned interest, catching your gaze. “I guess you really are ‘full of surprises’,” he teased with an overly flirtatious tone and an exaggerated wink. 

At that, your face reddened. You knew he was just joking, but the combination of you admitting to yourself that you found him attractive coupled with his flirty teasing and that wink... it was causing your heart rate to accelerate like you had a schoolgirl crush.  

And crushing on Buggy? The talking clown head? It was just all too ridiculous. 

You resumed your blade sharpening ritual, trying to pretend like he wasn’t affecting you. “Well, I did tell you that, didn’t I?” you asked, trying to turn the tables back on him. 

Buggy was silent for a beat as his eyes regarded you. HIs voice dropped an octave lower, intentionally or not, you weren’t sure, as he said in a more earnest tone, “Yeah... but I didn’t think it was true.” 

Your eyebrows shot up at hearing his admission, his tone surprising you as you quickly turned your head towards him. When you saw the look in his eyes, the way that he was still staring at you, it caused your heart to skip a beat. It was like he was seeing you for the first time, really seeing you. 

‘Being more than a pretty face’ wasn’t something you took lightly; it was something you lived by. It had become your mantra of some sort. Your whole life, you were underestimated, rarely ever being taken seriously because you ‘had a pretty face’ that you could ‘coast by’ on. People (men) always assumed you were too dumb to understand things or be smart and have talents because you were pretty, and it absolutely infuriated you.  

You shook your head, clearing up those thoughts. You didn’t feel like delving into that right now and especially not with Buggy of all people, so instead of biting back, you said with a curt, humorless laugh as you went back to your blade, “There’s always more to people than meets the eye, you know.” 

Buggy let out a snort, his green eyes looking towards the sky for a second. “Yeah,” he agreed. “No kidding.” 

Both of you became quiet, a few beats of strangely comfortable silence passing between the two of you before you broke it. 

“But probably not with you though,” you joked. “You’re probably just all clown, complete with bad jokes and questionable make up. And,” you looked at him, a spark of mischief in your eyes, “you’re probably not even that tall.” 

You hoped to God that Buggy really did have a sense a humor and that your playful jabs didn’t go over his bandana cladded head because you really didn’t want to make an enemy out of him. And if he didn’t get your sense of humor, then you and him probably would never work out anyway.  

Your stomach fell to your feet at the thought. What were you even saying?? Jesus, you really were delusional. The quicker you guys found Arlong and split ways with Buggy, the better. 

But of course, the universe had different plans for you, because Buggy did in fact have a sense of humor and took your mockery of his height in stride. 

“What- not tall?? Please,” his voice becoming playfully haughty. “Just wait until you see my body, sweetheart. I’ll be looking down at you, telling you the best jokes you’ve ever heard in your life with some fresh clown make-up on,” he said, winking at you with a click of his tongue. “I call it ‘the Buggy trifecta.’” 

You looked away from him, hiding your flushed cheeks as you shook your head, a smile on your face as you opened your mouth to say something back when Sanji came up to the upper deck, a small smile on his face when he saw you and effectively cutting off your banter. 

“Ah, there you are y/n!” the blonde cook called out. “I’ve been looking for you. I didn’t realize you’d be out here on, uh,” his blue eyes darted to Buggy for a nanosecond before looking back at you, “clown duty.” 

Buggy scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Well, good morning to you too, happy feet.” 

Sanji glanced at Buggy again, furrowing his eyebrows for a second before shaking his head once with a blink and letting out a small sigh as he turned his attention back to you, deciding it wasn’t worth it to argue with the clown head. 

“Yeah, so, uh, anyway,” he said as he put his hands in his pockets. “Breakfast is ready,” he relayed, jabbing a thumb behind him. “I wanted to let you know before it got cold.” 

“Hey, what about my breakfast, blondie?” Buggy complained. “I might just be a head right now, but a clown’s gotta eat, you know?” When he saw the questionable stares from you and Sanji, Buggy shook his head. “Don’t ask me how it works,” he said before either of you could say anything. “But it just does. I still get hungry and need to eat.” He looked back up at Sanji, his green eyes expectant. “So how about whipping me up some scrambled eggs, huh?” 

Sanji blinked. “Oh, well, sure-” 

“I got it, Sanji,” you said, cutting off your lifelong friend. You stood up from your seat, sheathing your daggers back into their holsters on your hips. “I’ll make you some eggs Buggy.” 

“Ooo, look at that,” Buggy laughed. “You really are full of surprises, aren’t you?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows. 

Ignoring the questioning look Sanji was giving you, you walked past the two men, well, man and talking head, and started going down the stairs. “Here’s another surprise: I’ll cook you your eggs once I’m done eating, in like an hour. How does that sound?” 

“Whoa, wait, wait, wait! I didn’t mean it like that, y/n!” Buggy quickly backtracked, trying his best to smooth things over with you as fast as he could. “I meant that as like, a good surprise! Really!” 

You smirked to yourself, finding it funny how quickly Buggy switched up his mannerisms in order to get what he wanted. “Sanji, you’re on clown duty!” You called out, tunning Buggy out, leaving him begging and pleading with a confused Sanji, who was wondering what the heck he just witnessed between you two. 

[susiephone]

while i find a lot of criticism of booktok and "booktok books" to be valid, a lot of it seems......very reminiscent of the anti-twilight stuff in the early 2010s. like specifically the parts that were like "TWILIGHT IS THE DEATH OF FEMINISM AND LITERACY" and "VAMPIRES AND BOOKS ARE RUINED FOREVER" and "THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO LIKE TWILIGHT ARE DUMB TEENAGE GIRLS WHO ARE DUMB AND DON'T KNOW ANY BETTER" rather than like. actual critiques of the books. and even some of the more valid claims would sort of position themselves as if teenage girls reading twilight can't tell fiction from reality. like i'm not saying you can't or shouldn't criticize popular books (i certainly have), or saying that it's not fun to rag on a book you hate (it sure as hell is). but treating a book you don't like getting popular (esp with teenagers) as the end of literacy and the publishing industry and good writing is just plain absurd.

like i'm not saying all these books are secretly masterpieces, or even that they're all good. i've read some shit booktok books, just like i read some shit YA books back in 2012. but weirdly, the world did not come to an end and good books are still getting published. many of those books provided me with genuine entertainment, solace, and community, even if in hindsight they weren't the best, and i don't think it's fair, kind, or logical to treat people like they're stupid for enjoying books like this. (not to mention, how many people really got into reading because of Generic YA Fantasy #45 or Fun Mindless Romance #207 or Pulply Trashy Sci-Fi #62? maybe they'll branch out into other types of literature, maybe not. but it's still good that they're reading.)

and, frankly, learning to recognize and critique genuinely problematic tropes and elements in these books has made me a better writer and more attentive and educated reader. sometimes being able to articulate why something is bad is important, and sometimes that requires actually reading the damn book. and i would say that goes double for books you enjoy but contain iffy elements - it's a lot easier to completely dismiss a book that's nothing but 500 red flags in a trenchcoat, but if you're in a place of "wow this book really spoke to me in x, y, z way and i really enjoyed it BUT a, b, c were really poorly handled," it gets trickier.

TL;DR: no, barnes and noble having a booktok table is not going to kill literature as we know it, and no, people enjoying a book you find overhyped and cringe doesn't mean they're all mindless sheep who can't enjoy True Literature. calm the fuck down.

[zahri-melitor]

I know you've all been waiting for this one: Sum of Our Parts (yes I finally got to Meghan Fitzmartin).

The very first thing I'll say: yeah, I see why DC commissioned more stuff from her after getting this and seeing the response. It's a solid opening showing her ability to write Tim.

There were a lot of moving parts that needed to be re-established and tidied up in this story, and I can see the list being worked through:-

Name: being very clear Tim is currently Robin, because since Tynion's 'Tec run ended, his name and costume have been varying by who is writing him with very little consistency.

Tim not going to university: this probably did need a push back on, because Tynion just waved the door open on that again during Joker War.

The fact that Tim and Steph are broken up (sort of essential for the plot being told)

Playing with the themes of moving on from Robin (but in this case using it as a frame to actually be the bait and switch that it's coming out instead)

Bernard is clearly an OC from the ground up who shares a name and hair colour with his previous existence. Which, look, Bernard was a pretty thin character with basically two personality traits (conspiracy theorist/trying really hard to project cool), and it is of course fairly arguable that Bernard was projecting a front at 16 that he no longer needs now he's accepted his identity. But it would be nice to have that conveyed in the text, rather than something you infer to try and connect two characters who are otherwise unalike. Especially given how much of the story is Tim reflecting on himself.

Even a line or two more about how he doesn't feel the need for a front anymore to line up with Tim having revelations. "Tell Tim Drake...he helped me realise my true self. Who I am" is nice enough but it could still use some more acknowledgement of how that changed his personality. It's just this nice parallel that could have helped develop the themes more securely. There's a bunch of possible implications you can read into the story (particularly in terms of how the Dowd parents really ARE characterised lightly as Fanon Drakes, between the polite fronts and implications that Bernard was previously abused at home in this) and this is one of the things that while I don't mind how much of this story Fitzmartin was telling via implication, a few more concrete things confirmed would have helped.

If I were going to make a solid stab of a guess at what sections of Robin Fitzmartin liked/reread in the lead into writing this, I honestly think it was Fabian Nicieza's Robin run (and probably parts of Red Robin). It's just...a lot of the characterisation has some very similar notes to it. Tim's got the same sort of smug confident edge to his internal commentary, the ways his skills are portrayed, and Detective Williams even reminds me quite a bit of Officer Jamie Harper. (I don't think she actually looked back over Willingham).

It's also very much a coming out story, and I do appreciate in that Fitzmartin does try to be delicate about it and doesn't whack you over the head with the bluntest lines possible (I just suffered through that in Infinite Frontier #0 with Alan Scott and good god did I cringe the entire way through the 'yes while you are my biological children and I have indeed been married. to women. I am gay. Listen to me come out.'), the amount of implied themes she levels through it is still substantial. It could have used slightly more focus on the actual underlying mystery.

I can also see the start of the situation where the story needs to decide whether Bernard Knows or Doesn't Know. Because both states would allow for situations with a lot of drama (and potentially identity shenanigans which are the best shenanigans), but just having it as sort of vacillating in the middle as something that doesn't need to be investigated? It's leaving a lot of potential storytelling on the floor that could instead be used to send Tim through the wringer. (Also Tim wow half of that cult probably could have figured out your identity, you weren't subtle)

Look, I don't think this story contained the greatest Barbara Gordon characterisation ever written, but it was within the bounds of overly-interfering, self-righteous and pushy Babs, which is something that does pop up at times. It felt in conversation with her characterisation in Batgirl 2009, and while I don't LIKE the way Babs is written in it, especially in regards to Steph, it makes sense in terms of the direction DC was pivoting at this point in terms of leading into the whole Batgirls title.

Fitzmartin was also clearly using Steph characterisation from very late Robin/BFTC/start of Red Robin, when they were fighting, in terms of how she's trying to have Steph needle at Tim's sore points, and set up a dichotomy of 'Steph has it together/Tim does not'.

And yes, Belén Ortega's art is very, VERY pretty.

[hangeslovers-world]

NERDY HANGE HCS!!!

A/n: i love thé idea of a nerdy loser hange so here are some thoughts and hc’s about em!!! And I hope you don’t mind if I tag you in this @abbyslev and @hangespublicist since I feel as though this is right up your ally!!! Not proof read..I’m lazy leave me BE.

Warnings! NSFW on the second half minors be warned

SFW!

-hanges favorite things to do with you is attempt to make you play dnd (with moblit and Erwin) they’re the dm EVERY TIME.

-if date nights are left up to hange it will without a doubt be watching documentary’s or a museum

-hange is a loser like they have friends but they would rather read books in their boxers and info dump on discord so you force them into the shower…a lot..

-hange has the cutest wide eye puppy look as they info dump to you about something “marsupials are so cool!!!” “Babe? What’s a marsupial…”

-they wear a visor and the nose sunscreen with a full on wet suit when you head to the beach and they snort and giggling making jokes about spf

-SPEAKING OF SNORTING hange snorts when they laugh not even just that but they slap their knee

- they have a flip phone you have to convince them to buy ANYTHING ELSE and even then they’ll be like “let’s compromise on a Nokia ok☹️”

-they walk around the house in stripped boxers and cringe tee-shirts like “nothing scares me but my wife”

-hange will take off their glasses wiggle and their eyebrows at you whenever you say something vaguely lewd…

-hange takes EVERY single ap not for college reason but because their bored…

-the only class hange has ever almost failed was art because hange cannot for the life of them draw

NSFW BIT MINORS DNI!!!

- get ready to ask yourself where the loser in them went…

-they eat pussy like crazy until you can’t speak they absolutely love it

-remember when I said they almost didn’t pass art? Yea that was a strap on day for sure your legs were aching

-UN TUCKING THEIR SHIRT TO FUCK YOU OMGGG (I’m so close to writing a whole fic about this alone)

-hange knows when they pick date nights it isn’t super exciting for you so they make it up by letting you sit on their face :)

-hange will wear glasses look up from between your legs while your panting and go “am I still a nerd?” Smirking then going right back.

-if hanges a little horny while tutoring they will have you sit and ride their thigh forcing you to answer questions

-the first time your nerdy partner and you had sex during aftercare you couldn’t muttering anything but “wow…” and hange went right back to being a goofy loser wiggling their eyebrows going “oooh la la”

-it’s like two different people the same person who snorts and slaps their knee is the same person denying you a orgasm like WHAT!?!

God I’ve gotta write a one shot for this cutie!!!

[rosesradio]

Hello! I saw that you were taking requests. Would you mind writing a Peter Parker x Reader fic where he is just absolutely head over heels and the reader just doesn't know. The two are good friends so when the reader needs a date for a destination wedding she asks Peter. Cue the classic tropes. ✨💕

hii, here you go !! 🫶 i put in all the best tropes, including friends to lovers, fake dating, only one bed, he fell first she fell harder…it’s a lot, and it was so fun to write. thanks for the request & reblogs are appreciated <3

my inbox is open, please read my pinned!

word count: 4,105

warnings: light swearing, some sexually suggestive jokes

The Wedding Date

"Hm," you hummed, pacing from one side of your living room to the other. In balancing out your racing train of thought, you had picked up the giant stuffed teddy bear that rested on your couch. "Hm, hm, hm..."

"Hm," Peter echoed, narrowing his eyes as he watched you, an amused smile tugging at his lips. "Can I ask what's bothering you, or am I gonna be left in the dark while you keep humming for another five minutes?"

"Ugh, I'm sorry," you sighed, forcing yourself to stand still and hug the giant bear to your chest. It was then that you remembered how you got this bear, Teddy, in the first place: Peter won it for you at a carnival. He must have played the stupid, rigged ring toss half a dozen times before he finally scored the big prize. He was such a gentleman, too, holding on to it while you got cotton candy for the both of you.

He was the most selfless person you knew. When you saw behind the Spider-Man mask after two years of knowing Peter, you weren't at all surprised; anyone else with his abilities would have given in to darker fantasies, though he had none.

If Peter was always so willing to be helpful, he could probably do you this tiny favor, right?

"I was just thinking," you started. "I got this wedding invitation recently from my friend, Lindsey—"

"A wedding?" Peter asked with raised brows. "On—on purpose?"

Noticing his smile, you rolled your eyes and flipped him the bird, unable to help but smile yourself. "I know, we're at that age—we're gonna get a ton of wedding invitations, and each one is gonna prompt some sort of crisis where we feel both too old and too young for any major milestone."

"Wow," Peter whistled. "That's so wise—are you seeing a therapist?" Without waiting for an answer to his rhetorical question, he continued: "You know, you could avoid a lot of crises if you just didn't have friends." He gestured to himself.

You looked at him incredulously. "You have me—and Ned. And MJ."

Peter hesitated. His brows furrowed, and he avoided your eyes. "Sure, but...I mean...you're not even close to getting married. You don't even have a boyfriend."

"Gee, thanks."

"Sorry," Peter cringed. "I didn't mean—"

"That's okay," you said. "You kinda have a point. That's actually what I've been contemplating. My plus one."

Peter's brows rose. "You need a wedding date."

You nodded. "I don't have to have one—and I'd ordinarily just say screw it and tell MJ to put on her best suit, but..." you shrugged, putting Teddy back down on the couch. "Lindsey is..." you sighed. "She means well, but she can be a bit...uppity about my love life? She always points out when I don't have a boyfriend, and it obviously makes me feel...well, like crap."

"Again, sorry," Peter said, grabbing Teddy and cuddling into him. It was honestly a cute picture—not that you would admit that to your best friend. "But you don't have to find a date to the wedding unless you really want one, you know? You shouldn't do anything just because of what other people are gonna think."

You smiled slightly. "Peter, you're starting to sound like an after-school special again." You paused. "But you have a point...I don't want the stress of finding some random guy for the wedding, and I can't bring just a friend..." you lit up. "So, I could make my own boyfriend! Peter, you're a boy, right?"

Peter laughed softly. "Last time I checked, yeah."

"Could you..." you started. "I mean, I don't want to take advantage. You're too kind for your own good sometimes. But, if you wanted to go to a beautiful destination wedding on a beach at Prince Edward Island..." you rocked on your feet from heel to toe. "You could maybe play the role of my fake boyfriend?"

Peter blinked, the smile not leaving his face, though his eyes appeared distant. "I don't know, y/n. That seems—"

"You're right," you shook your head. "It's not right of me to ask that—you need to be here because Spider-Man needs to be here. Forget I said anything. I'll figure something out. Maybe I'll download Tinder again..." although you tried not to, you made a face at the thought of plunging back into the cesspool.

Peter gave you a strange look, then, as if there were some sort of misunderstanding. You didn't like that—understanding social cues were a hit or miss, but communication with Peter was usually crystal clear.

"Wait," Peter shook his head with a sigh. "It's a beach wedding, right? At some point, they're probably gonna have popcorn shrimp..."

You smiled slightly. "Are you seriously thinking of going on a four hour plane ride there and back, pretending to be my boyfriend, and giving up your entire weekend just for...popcorn shrimp?"

"Yeah, of course," Peter nodded. "I've gone on trips and taken time away from being Spider-Man before. If anything really goes wrong, I can find my way back and try to help. Besides, I don't want this Lindsey girl to make you feel bad. I might not be the best looking stand-in boyfriend, but at least I'm here with fast and free shipping." He did some half-hearted jazz hands, though his smile was genuine.

"You're the best, Peter!" You sat down beside him, pulling him (and Teddy) into a hug. "And don't you dare talk bad about yourself. We're gonna go to that wedding with two missions—one, we're gonna make everyone jealous with what a cute fake couple we are. Two, we're gonna get you as much popcorn shrimp as you want."

"Sounds like a plan," Peter agreed, leaning his head against yours.

You could only hope that he really wanted to do this. You remembered all of those faux-sweet comments Lindsey would make about how she worried about you being alone. With Peter's help, you'd make even those newlyweds jealous, all the while making sure you and Peter had the times of your life on the trip.

———

The first bump in the road hit you when you arrived at the hotel room.

The flight there was nice; you and Peter watched movies and played games. In the last hour, you had drifted off to sleep leaning against Peter's shoulder. That was a little embarrassing to wake up to, but it was nothing that hadn't happened before.

This had never happened before.

"One bed," Peter commented blankly, though the surprise across his features was clear.

"You've gotta be kidding me," you huffed, dropping your bags down onto the massive bed. The place appeared pretty romantic, with a plush red duvet and a light dimmer. There was even a bucket of ice with a bottle of champagne, and—

"Chocolate dipped strawberries," you lit up, going over to the display and reading the adjoining card.

"Are we in the wrong room?" Peter asked. "'Cause I can go back down and—"

You shook your head, holding up the card with a smile. "For y/n and Peter, Compliments of Lindsey and Matt. You know, this doesn't surprise me at all. Lindsey's always had money, and she likes to keep up her appearances."

Peter narrowed his eyes, an amused smile tugging at his lips as he watched you eat one of the strawberries. "I'm still not sure if we're supposed to like Lindsey."

You shrugged. "She's got her flaws, but I like her. Almost as much as I like these strawberries. Almost." You offered him a strawberry, expecting him to take it. What you did not expect was for him to lean forward and take the strawberry with his mouth. Your face flushed, though you weren't sure why. You and Peter had done that with fries before, why were strawberries different? It was probably just the romantic vibe of the room, with the dimmed lights and the—

"So, the bed," you tried to distract yourself from that odd train of thought. "I can try to get a different room, but Lindsey might get wind of it and start asking questions...it's fine." You shook your head, offering Peter a smile. "I can just sleep on the floor."

Peter laughed. "You'd sleep on the floor? No way. This isn't like crashing at Ned's studio after a night out. This is a nice vacation. I'll take the floor."

"I don't want you on the floor," you protested.

"I don't think anyone wants either of us on the floor, that's why we're here fake-dating each other." Peter pointed out. He said the joke quickly, as if not thinking about it, and his cheeks grew pink.

You snickered. You knew Peter hated when he let the dirty jokes in his mind get ahead of him, but it was something that endeared you to him. He wasn't always Spider-Man the superhero, or Peter Parker, dressed like a Mormon to meet your parents for brunch. Sometimes he was almost...normal.

You knew more than anything that nothing could be normal for Peter.

You rolled your eyes and finally settled. "If it's not pushing any boundaries, maybe we could just...share the bed? If you promise not to sleep naked, I mean."

You don't know what prompted you to say that...or to picture it, though you quickly tried to dismiss it.

"Okay," Peter's voice was surprisingly soft at the suggestion. "I mean, just a couple hours ago you were drooling on my shoulder on the plane, so—"

"I said I was sorry!" You interjected, your own cheeks heating.

Peter grinned. "You know, I think I brought my nightgown in case this exact thing—" the rest of his smartass reply was cut off as you pushed a pillow into his face, only able to hear a muffled laugh.

———

You were too focused on your own breathing. It was unnatural.

You rolled over to see the clock on Peter's side. 12:54 AM. You huffed, trying to nuzzle into your pillow. You'd had a couple glasses of champagne with Peter, which typically would have put you to sleep as soon as your head hit the pillow, but...

But...

"Can't sleep?"

Peter's voice was soft and low with sleep, though not so much so that you worried you had woken him. You couldn't see him in the dark, though you could picture him—tussled brown hair, his baggy I Survived NYC shirt wrinkled against the sheets.

You always took notice of him in the mornings—when you spent the night at his place or vice versa, and he'd make you both waffles. You could appreciate a gesture from a friend, but in those strange moments, he seemed almost like a boyfriend.

"No," you replied. "Not used to the space, I guess."

Peter nodded—you could hear it against the sheets in the darkness. "I get that—'m living the dream, though. Couldn't tell you the last time I had a girl in my bed."

"Gross," you jabbed him in the ribs, and you smiled at the sound of his snicker. "In your dreams, Parker."

"Yeah, yeah," Peter murmured. "I do kinda miss it, though. I don't have a lot of...experience, but that's not what I'm thinking about..."

In that moment, you were sure Peter was talking some half-asleep nonsense. You were tempted to ask him some silly questions, like what his dream blunt rotation would be, or what his social security number was.

Instead, you pressed on, curious. "What are you thinking about, then?"

"Mm," Peter hummed, hesitant even in this careless state. "Just...being in bed with someone, holding them close, feeling 'em breathe. Knowing that you're keeping them safe. Knowing they want you there, that you're not a screwup..."

Something in Peter's tone made your eyes sting. "You're nowhere near a screwup. You're a hero."

"I know..." he let out a soft breath, though something in it sounded heavy.

"I was friends with you before I knew about that, anyway," you pointed out. "Because you're more than a hero. You're Peter. That matters so much more than anything else you do. Anybody would be lucky to be in bed with you...even if you have the dirty mind of a teen about it." You grinned.

Peter let out another breath, this one of laughter. A comfortable silence spanned between the pair of you.

It was silent for so long, you thought Peter had fallen asleep.

"Do you," he started, and you listened curiously. "Would you be okay with maybe cuddling with me? We've done it on the couch with movies, but I know this is different, so..."

"Yeah," you replied in agreement. "I mean, um—yeah, of course, that's fine..."

Slowly, a little awkwardly in the dark, Peter reached out, his fingertips delicate against your skin as he sought you out. He found your forearm first, reaching up and tracing along the palm of your hand.

"Sorry," his voice seemed much more awake now, much more aware. "If you could maybe just..."

You nodded even though he couldn't see you in the dark. You rolled onto your other side, facing away from him as you pushed back against him. You felt the warmth of his chest against your back, the feeling all-too-overwhelming. The feeling increased tenfold when, all implications disregarded, Peter wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you close against him. You could feel the warmth of his breath against the crook of your neck.

You couldn't remember the last time you had been in bed with someone like this.

You let out a soft, shaky breath of your own, trying to calm the sudden bout of nervous butterflies in your stomach that now fluttered with no bounds. Strangely enough, that feeling only lasted for a moment. The last thing you remember was the feeling of Peter's thigh moving against yours, wrapping you closer in the embrace. It was then that comfort overwhelmed you, and you found yourself drifting off to sleep easier than ever before.

———

The morning light was bright despite the blinds, waking you up as you hummed in protest.

You and Peter were still cuddled close together, though the embrace had lost all structure. His leg was slung over your waist, his hand somehow cupping the side of your face. He was nuzzled between your shoulder blades, letting out warm breaths against your skin that woke you up far more than the brightness.

"Peter," your voice was low in your drowsiness. You rolled away before stretching. "You were a second away from putting me in a headlock..."

"Mm," Peter hummed. "Sorry..." he yawned, blinking as he processed what was going on. Something then seemed to click within him, and he stiffened like a deer in headlights. "Shit, sorry!" He repeated, his cheeks flushing. "Man, I didn't mean to do that..."

"It's okay," you insisted. "Why are you all jumpy? What, were you worried about your super-strength or something?"

"Oh, uh," Peter avoided your eyes. "Yeah, that's exactly it—I mean, I could crush a watermelon between my thighs without even worrying—without even thinking about it, so..." he lifted his arm up to flex, which you glanced at with raised brows. He was no Captain America, but he was built well enough.

"Okay," you said slowly. Realization then dawned on you, and you sighed, your cheeks heating. “Is it that we, like, cuddled last night? Because that didn't have to mean anything—we both just like cuddling."

"Sure," Peter nodded. "I mean, I cuddled with Ned all the time in high school, but..."

"But?" You inquired.

"No but!" Peter shook his head. "No but at all, an absolute flat-ass situation..." he paused to catch his breath before nodding, his mouth pressed in a thin line. "I'm gonna go get ready."

He then went and locked himself in the bathroom. You looked at the door, then over to the closet where his clothes were, wondering what the heck had gotten into Peter.

———

Luckily, Peter seemed calmed down by the reception. The ceremony must have bored him; he kept glancing at you the entire time, as well as shaking his leg until you put a hand on his knee to still him.

Despite the social atmosphere, Peter seemed to open up more. After the first few times of introducing himself as "y/n's boyfriend", the obvious looks in your direction slowed to a stop. That did not stop his awkwardness, though. As endeared as you were to him, you were glad he never had to do any acting to save the world.

"Excuse me," a small voice piped up. It wasn't the umpteenth elderly couple doing their rounds of greetings, but instead a little girl of about six years old. She wore a pastel pink dress and small matching heels.

"Oh, hi," you smiled at the little girl. "You were the flower girl—Katie, right?"

Katie nodded. "I wanted a dance." She looked over at Peter, then back at you. "Mind if I take him for a spin?"

You nearly snorted. "Oh, sure—what do you think, Peter?"

Peter seemed to be trying to tone down his amused smile. "I'd be honored, Katie." He took her hand and allowed her to lead him to the floor.

As you ate—the shrimp here being unfortunately coconut, not popcorn—you watched them dance. She was standing on top of his shoes, and he seemed to be masking the pain from the jabbing of her tiny heels. As he smiled and chatted with her, you couldn't help but smile as well. Peter was good with kids—you wondered if that came from being Spider-Man, or just being Peter.

When the song was over, Katie curtsied and Peter bowed in turn, as if they were at a ball. Peter returned to the table beaming, and for some reason, it made your heart catch in your chest. You felt as if you wanted to say something, though you weren't sure what, or if you were allowed to.

Just as you opened your mouth to say something, you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around to see Lindsey, who was practically glowing with excitement in her cream-colored reception gown.

"Hey!" You gave her a hug. "Wow, you look gorgeous. Congratulations!"

"Thank you," Lindsey swept a black, curly strand of hair from her face. "And you do too! Is this," she gestured to Peter. "Is this your plus one? I saw him dancing with Katie, it was adorable!"

Peter nodded. "I'm y/n's boyfriend," he stood to shake her hand, then her new husband's. "Peter."

"It's so nice to meet you, Peter," Lindsey replied. "I didn't think y/n was seeing anyone, but she never lets me get too nosy. I was worried about her for a little bit, though!" She laughed.

Peter gave you a look, as if some of your previous description of her was clicking into place.

"We've been together for a little while," Peter shrugged, fixing Lindsey with a curious look. "Nine months, right, babe?" He glanced back at you and smiled, his gaze warm. "It feels like it's been years, but also a few great days."

For a moment, you sat in stunned silence, unsure of how to respond. His acting was so real; he seemed utterly infatuated.

Lindsey gasped softly, placing a hand on her heart. "That's exactly how I feel with my husband. Well, how'd you two meet?"

"Um," Peter started with a slight smile. "We were at this bagel place on 76th, and I was ordering my usual—"

"An everything bagel," you added out of habit. "With plain cream cheese, smushed down really flat, like a weirdo."

"Exactly," Peter laughed. "And you said that, too, remember? I remember you scoffed, and when I asked, you said that only a weirdo would want a bagel that was...what was it? Looked like it was ran over?"

"I had a point," you replied. "And you asked me what I liked, since I was such an expert in all things bagel. So I got my—"

"Blueberry bagel," Peter recalled. "Strawberry cream cheese, plus you paid extra for assorted fruit on top, like an absolute princess."

You grinned. "But you paid for mine...and you walked me to the subway, like a gentleman, while I spent the entire time roasting you on your food preferences."

"And then I offered to take her to dinner," Peter looked up at Lindsey. "I said that I knew this great pizza place, and if she wasn't blown away, I'd cover her bill. Turns out she was blown away, as expected," he met your eyes with a smile, reaching over and grabbing your hand. "But I paid, anyway. It was worth it times a thousand to get to know her..."

You squeezed his hand, and in that moment, you felt as if something were squeezing your heart, too. The way he talked about it made it sound so romantic...but, of course, neither of you mentioned the fact that his friends were at the dinner. That you had asked for it to not be a date, because you had been stood up a few nights before and were not feeling the dating scene. It was a friend thing, and at that dinner your friend status was cemented.

You never thought you wanted anything else, but...

"Excuse me," Peter's voice brought you back to reality. He smiled thinly at both you and Lindsey before standing and starting for the exit.

Perhaps he just needed to use the restroom down the hall, but something about his exit seemed...swift. Offering a smile to Lindsey as well, you followed in Peter's steps.

When you finally found him, he had a hand over his eyes, his face flushed as he tried to steady his breathing.

You felt as if you'd walked in on something you shouldn't have—or perhaps you needed to.

"Peter?" You asked softly.

Peter nearly jumped, looking at you before making a pointed effort not to do so. "Hey! Hey...y/n...I'm alright. Just...taking a second to—"

"Cry?" You asked, the word slipping out before you could think about it, and you slapped a hand over your mouth.

Peter laughed. You rushed through surprise, relief, and concern so fast, you had whiplash.

"Yeah," Peter admitted with a sigh. "I'm...not alright. But I'm trying to be. Just...go enjoy the reception, don't let me ruin it."

You shook your head. "That story...it was how we met, but you made it sound romantic."

Peter nodded. "I thought that was what we were supposed to do."

You swallowed. "It sounded really convincing. You...you like me, don't you, Peter?"

Peter seemed laser-focused on the sleeve of his suit. "How could I not, y/n?" He settled. "You're beautiful, you're fun in the same weird way I am, and you have no idea when someone's into you—you're exactly my type. But...I mean, I was trying so hard not to be that guy. You know, the 'be my girlfriend or I'll never talk to you again' guy? I can't do that—not to you, and not to myself. I want you in my life in whatever way I can have you, even if it kills me, because you're really important to me. And if you don't want to talk to me again, I understand, I won't push—"

His words faltered into silence as you reached out and held his hand.

"I like you, too, Peter. I don't think I realized it until now, but..." You started to smile. "You're one of my favorite people in the world. You’re already a great friend, so I'd love to be your girlfriend."

Peter seemed incredulous, though a moment later, his uncertain smile grew until he was fully beaming. His smile was contagious, and you couldn't help but smile as well. You went in for a hug, and he in turn lifted you, spinning you around as if you were in a romcom.

"So," Peter started. "Do you wanna go back in there and turn up the charm now that we're a real couple?"

You pondered the idea for about a half a second before shaking your head. "Screw those guys." You said. "You wanna get out of here? I bet we could find a good ice cream place."

"Sounds good to me," Peter replied, offering you a fist to bump. "Let's go to the room and get changed into some comfier clothes."

As he started towards the stairs, you reached for his hand, your heart skipping a beat as he squeezed your hand gently. You didn't want to rush things, though you wondered...perhaps when you got up to the room, you could kiss him. Perhaps, if he were interested—and while that romantic room was on someone else's bill—you could do a little bit more.

[rottingparts]

Taste

[Ironhide x Fem!Human!Reader x Ratchet]

Summary: You like the Autobots... Specifically Ratchet and Ironhide. You are sure no one ever has to know, but when a coworker confesses to you things go down hill fast.

Word Count: 2,200+

Warnings: SMUT, 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI! Not beta'd, Oral (Fem Receiving), mentions of anxiety, weird guy behavior (not from the bots), nothing too bad, let me know if I should tag something though!

A/N: This was written because I'm very self indulgent and cringe is dead! That being said, this was written with Plus Sized!Reader and also Neurodivergent!Reader in mind! BUT! It doesn't have to be read that way! Also, this isn't set in a specific movie. Everyone is alive and happy :)

No one had to know you adored alien robots, no one needed to know. Especially your earth friends. Or the robots themselves for that matter. Absolutely no one was going to know. It was definitely a secret you could and should keep to yourself.

You had been working closely with the autobots, and had ended up in the lab with several of them, helping with whatever they needed. Ratchet seemed the most grateful for that. You were both learning and helping  each other at the same time. He got to learn more about human culture and you got to learn about Cybertron.

That is where you started to realize you maybe liked robots a lot more than humans. Ratchet was so sweet and thoughtful.

One day, while working with Ratchet, Ironhide entered the lab. You had little interaction with him before that moment and were honestly kind of nervous around him. But as you got to know the weapons specialist you started to like him as well…

But… No one had had to know.

Until, one of your scientist friend’s decided to drop the worst bomb possible right in your lap.

“Hey.” A voice that was not Ironhide’s or Ratchet’s rang through the lab. You rolled your eyes involuntarily before turning around to look at him. “We need to talk.”

“Oh,” Your eyes widened momentarily, “That’s a good way to greet someone, Mark.”

“What?” Mark looked taken aback.

“I have anxiety, that’s not a thing I generally like to hear…”

“Oh,” Mark visibly grew anxious, causing you to mimic the panic. “Well, I just, I wanted to ask you out-”

You froze, “Like on a date?”

“I mean, like if you’re into it-”

“I’m sorry,” You interrupted him quickly, not thinking much about him not finishing his sentence, “You’re my friend-”

It was his turn to cut you off. “You’re friend zoning me? I like you a lot!”

“You can get over that, don’t worry.”

Mark’s eyes narrowed. “Is this- Are you-”

You cocked your head at him as his wheels turned in his big scientist brain. Something clicked. But not necessarily correctly. Wires crossed somewhere.

“You’re fucking the robots!” His voice echoed through the lab.

You figured ‘No, but I want to be,’ was not a tactful answer. So, you did the next less tactful thing. Which did not help your case at all. You grew defensive, and yelled back. “No!” It sounded more like a question than a statement. “Why would I- What are you on about?”

“You hang out with- with those-”

“Autobots.”

“Shut up!” He was growing furious. Your eyes widened and you decided to get the fuck away from him. Without thinking you turned to walk away and his hand grabbed your shoulder, turning you right back around. “You are fucking the robots!”

You were frozen. The large hangar door opened and Ironhide and Ratchet walked in, seemingly aware of the yelling.

“What’s going on?” Ironhide’s voice was gruff and his optics were narrowed. “Why are you yelling at Y/N?”

You swallowed. “You aren’t helping my case…” You turned around, speaking through gritted teeth.

“Wow,” Mark scoffed, “you picked these two?”

“Picked us for what?” Ratchet cocked his head.

“Oh, don’t play dumb,” Mark rolled his eyes, “I figured out she was with you two.”

“Are you delusional?!” You finally snapped at him. “They would never like me like that! Drop this shit, get over me, and fucking leave!”

Mark stood there, staring at you, gawking. This time, whatever he was thinking, was definitely right. “You… You do like them…”

Ironhide crouched down, closing in on the scientist. “It’s best if you leave.” He growled out. “She won’t ask again.”

Mark gulped and decided it would be best to leave. You groaned and placed your head in your hands. “Thanks for that,” You sighed. “I didn’t know if he’d ever leave me alone.” You stood up straight and looked at Ironhide and Ratchet, “Well… Um. I’m gonna go to bed.”

“It’s mid afternoon, you do not go to sleep until after dark. Usually around ten o’clock.”

“Why do you know that?” Ironhide interrupted Ratchet.

“For the exact same reason you know what time Y/N is gonna be in the lab everyday of the week.”

Ratchet spoke with a matter of fact tone. He crossed his arms and for a moment, a brief moment, Ratchet and Ironhide’s optics met and they seemed to be glaring at each other. You were fast to jump in and break it up.

“Hey! I find it enduring! It’s nice you’ve picked up on those things! Well… It is a little weird that you know what time I go to bed… Who needs that knowledge?”

“Exactly!” Ironhide threw his servos up, “It’s weird!”

“But!” You went to reassure Ratchet, “It definitely isn’t as weird as what just happened!”

There was an awkward silence, one that you could only smile for so long for. Yoursmile grew awkward and your eyes went from Ratchet, to Ironhide, back to Ratchet, and dropped to the ground. You scratched the back of your neck and swallowed hard.

“Mark was right, wasn’t he?”

“I’m not fucking anyone!” Your hands went up and your eyes widened. “No,” Ironhide grumbled, his optics rolling, “he said you liked us. And I’m assuming he means the kind of ‘like’ that means you want to be more than friends.”

You did the only thing you could think of, “Aw, do you guys count me as a friend?”

“This isn’t about us.” Ironhide started.

“Yes it is.” Ratchet finished. “And yes we do. But, speaking for both of us here, we ‘like’ you.” He put air quotations around the word ‘like’.

Your eyes widened and you smiled. “Really?!”

Ironhide looked like he wanted to beat the shit out of Ratchet, but only briefly. “Don’t ever speak for me again.” His voice rumbled, and he glared at Ratchet. Then he turned towards you, optic ridges resting, causing his optics to soften slightly, and he crouched down to your level. “You seemed awfully enthusiastic at that confession-”

“I like, um- I would love to be more than friends with both of you…” Ratchet lit up, Ironhide close behind. You all three stood there a moment. “What now?” You asked. “I’ve never confessed to anyone, much less two someones.”

Ironhide and Ratchet seemed about as confused as you were, until an idea struck you. “Remember, Ratchet, when you said you wanted to learn more about human anatomy… Up close, and personally?”

It clicked for both Ratchet and Ironhide. Immediately they were closing in on you. “Wait!” You put our hands up. “We don’t need anyone walking in on us… I’ll lock the main doors, you go lock the hangar door. And, someone take care of the camera-”

Ironhide was quick to obliterate the camera in the corner of the room. Your eyes widened at his eagerness and you ran towards the door to lock it. You were back at the center of the room in what felt like seconds and you waited for Ratchet to return after he locked the door.

“Where to start…?” Ironhide examined you closely.

“I could get rid of these clothes for starters.” You were eager to begin stripping, and you were quickly exposed to them, standing in your underwear. Vulnerability hit and you began fidgeting. You weren’t sure where that burst of confidence came from, but it was suddenly gone.

“We do not have to do this. Not now, if you don’t want to.” Ratchet noticed your nervousness.

“Um, no! I want to! Really!” You swallowed hard, sure the sound echoed through the room, “Uh, I've never been this exposed in front of uh, Cybertronians…?” You sounded confused, your arms hugging you tightly.

“No worries,” Ironhide was closer to you than Ratchet, his optics observing you, “We’ve never never been this close to an organic before-” He looked like he wanted to get rid of your underwear.

Ratchet moved closer to you when you dropped your arms to your sides and it was his turn to observe. He reached out for you and even though you did not flinch away, he paused. “May I?” He politely asked.

“Of course.”

One of his fingers touched your stomach and when you sucked in from the cool feeling, Ratchet flinched back. You reassured him you were fine and he continued. “You are very soft,” He made mental notes. His hand grabbed for your waist and gave you a gentle squeeze. He pulled away and Ironhide started to butt in.

“My turn.”

Ironhide needed to know how soft you were. He grabbed for your thigh and the soft flesh moved with his hand. Ironhide cocked his head and looked at you. “Comfortable enough to get rid of these?” When you nodded, he asked another question. “Are they important to you?” You shook your head. They were ripped from you. The cool air caused you to gasp and close your legs.

“Why is it so damn cold in here?” You groaned.

“I don’t think you’ll be cold much longer…”

You relax and inhale deeply. With legs still slightly crossed, you reach to undo your bra. You let it fall to the floor and Ironhide and Ratchet are both very close to you again, looking at your breasts. You can’t help but awkwardly smile at them, Ironhide reaching out to touch them.

“I never knew how soft you would actually be-” Ratchet was in awe. “-I could just-”

He didn’t know what he could do. Him and Ironhide were stunned. Ironhide made the first move. “Get on the table right there.” With a nod, you obliged. You hopped onto the cool table and awaited more instructions. “Hm,” Ironhide was taking mental notes now, “You are very obedient.”

“She deserves a reward.” Ratchet was smiling.

“She’s much too small for our spikes-” Your eyes widened at Ironhide’s words, “-but I think I know a way to reward her.”

Ratchet did not have time to ask ‘how?’. Ironhide was moving too fast for Ratchet to have time to say anything. Your thighs were gently grabbed, Ironhide’s large servos being extremely gentle with you. Your legs were spread and Ironhide was in your business instantly. You leaned back slightly and waited for Ironhide’s next move.

“You aren’t much different than us in this department.” Ironhide examined you closer than before. “Can I- Hm, can I taste you?”

You wanted to hide your face. “Sure-” That was all it took. Ironhide’s head was between your legs, practically keeping them spread. His tongue was lapping at you, slowly at first. His optics were closed and he was obviously focused on every inch of you. You fell back on your forearms, resting them on the cool metal of the table. You stifled a moan.

“Be loud.” Ratchet blurted out, “We want to know how you feel.”

You nodded and as soon as Ironhide found your clit you let out a loud moan. Your head fell back and your eyes shut. A soft hum fell from your lips and your breathing quickened.

Ironhide kept doing his thing and caught on very quickly on what pace you liked and how roughly he could hold you.

“Ironhide-” You moaned out, “I’m gonna-” Your nails were digging into your palms. Ironhide understood. Your hips bucked upwards and Ironhide rumbled against you. It drove you over the edge. You were coming undone against his mouth and Ironhide was smiling against you.

A loud moan echoed through the lab as you came. You had half expected Ironhide to keep going, but suddenly, the feeling of him between your legs was gone.

“My turn,” Ratchet mimicked Ironhide’s earlier words.

“Did you just pull me away?

“Yes, I would like a taste,” Ratchet positioned himself between your legs, not even giving Ironhide his attention when he talked. Ratchet’s servos placed themselves on your waist and you leaned back again.

Ratchet was quick to begin to tongue fuck you. His tongue swirled around your clit before licking stripes up your pussy. His optics were not closed. They stayed on your eyes. He maintained eye contact with you as he ‘tasted’ you. He would slowly blink at you, and you were too stunned to look away.

Your hips bucked and Ratchet was quick to push them back down. You let out a soft whine and looked over at Ironhide briefly, who was just… watching. You looked back at Ratchet and everything in you started to tense. A knot formed in your stomach and you were coming undone again.

“Ratchet!” You exclaimed with eyes shut, head thrown back, and body tensed. Ratchet did not slow. You were squirming beneath him. “Fuck!”

A knock came from the hangar door. The only thing causing Ratchet to stop in his tracks.

You writhed with pleasure once he let you go, not registering the knock. You lied on the table and heard Ironhide shout something. You looked up and saw Ironhide with your clothes in one of his servos. He was trying to hand them to you.

“Hey,” Hound yelled from the other side of the hangar door, “Why do-” He paused, “Why do I smell… ‘Fluids’?” As soon as the words left his mouth were rushing to get dressed. “Is there a human in there?”

“Go away!” Ratchet yelled back.

“Ratchet and Ironhide?” Hound bellowed back, laughing loudly, “You both have a human in there?”

“The other scientists,” You started, finishing getting dressed, “they’re going to be here soon, asking about that camera. I should go…” Ratchet and Ironhide looked at you, optic ridges rising. “But, this doesn’t have to be it, not if you don't want it to be!”

Ratchet and Ironhide nodded, “We aren’t done with you yet.”

[thenewausten]

visiting mexico with alex to see his family. around dinner time you help his mom with making dinner, his parents asking you questions at the dinner table, seeing embarrassing baby pictures, cuddling in his childhood room😭, going on night walks/drives and exploring

Thanks for the request!

Visiting Mexico with Quackity HC's!

You'd love his family and his family would love you! His mom would hug you so tight, telling you how beautiful you were <3

Helping her and his sister making dinner. His sister would tell you the best stories about teenager!Alex, mocking him soooo badly, lmao

At the dinner table, they'd want to know you better. "So, Y/N, do you do the same thing as Alex?" His dad asked. "Yes, I'm a streamer too."

"That's nice! How long?" He asks again, smiling at you. "Five years, I started with seventeen years old."

"Do you have a YouTube channel?" His mom asked. "Yes! I do videos about games there." You answer. "Y/N, have you seen Alex's cringe videos?" His sister asks to you as she laughs, Alex rolls his eyes. "Don't talk about my dark past, please."

"The music parodies?" You ask, laughing."Yeah!" His sister laughs with you and Alex groans, embarrassed."Stop mocking me in front of my girlfriend!" He says and you put a hand on his thigh. "I think it's cute." You say. "Don't lie to me, amor." He whispers. "I'm being serious!" You approach him and kiss his cheek. "Wow, she really loves you." His sister says and he rolls his eyes again, laughing.

After dinner, his parents would show you his baby pictures, telling you stories about his childhood <3 You'd laugh so hard with some photos and with his sister making fun of him, making you laugh even more. Alex, of course, would be hating the experience, sitting next to you while you smile at a picture of him in a bathtub.

Later, you both went to his old bedroom so you'd sleep. You put your pajamas and lay down next to him, your boyfriend smiles to you and pulls you into a hug. "I'm so happy you're here." He whispers to you. "I'm so happy to be here, baby. I loved your family." You say, smiling to him in the dark. "I loved the baby pictures." He laughs. "I can't wait to see your baby photos." He whispers, hugging you tighter. "Next weekend, what do you think?" You ask. "Of course, princesa."

He'd play his old piano to you <3

Alex'd take you to bike rides on his favourite places, he'd also take you to eat at his favourite restaurant when he was younger :(

Lots of talks about childhood in the middle of the night, lots of walks and lots of laughs with his family, lots os cuddles and kisses on his bed and his favourite places!!@

Imagine you both staring at the sunset on the roof of his house??? You'd kiss him while he hugs your waist. "I love you so much, Y/N."

"I love you too, Alex."

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy the writing! :)

Requests are open!

[oncewhenalongtimeago]

Hello I literally love ur writing style SO much, been binge reading all your httyd stuff and having a blast!!! Ty for being awesome, ur updates always make my day :3

The Jealous One pt 5

Pairing: Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III x Fem!Reader

Words: 1848

The Great Hall is always a nice place to frequent when one’s seeking companionship. You are, however, not doing that.

Tags: fem!reader, silly, ambiguous timeline, Snotlout Jorgenson, Ruffnut and Tuffnut Thorston, Jealous!Hiccup, Post RoB/DoB, Pre-RTTE

<Previous - Next>

You spoke and acted suddenly with Hiccup and with a wrongness that had made you uneasy for days to follow.

Acting out with Snotlout and the Twins had gone against a lot of your do-good lay-low-and-miserable instincts, which made you momentarily numb to them, in a way. 

When you were caught up with them, too busy to think, you ended up doing things in ways you definitely wouldn't have had you been thinking normally. The joy always ended up outweighing any other feelings you might have had on what you did later, but now it was a little different.

You feigned normal, but also you avoided Hiccup a lot, so you weren’t sure how you ended up here.

“-I don’t think that does anything for most dragons,” Fishlegs looked down at Ruffnut, some of his general nervous demeanor melting away in favor of minor exhaustion at her relentless questioning, maybe catching on some, “There are some, but…”

Snotlout was off on the other side of the Hall. Be it far below him to serve. However, he’d lost a very minor bet so he had to go get you guys dinner for the next five weeks.

You weren’t quite sure where Ruffnut was. Busy, probably. 

You sighed, slightly rotating the mug you had in hand, slumping down on a nearby bench, giving the off-put Viking a rest. That wasn’t your intention, to put him off, anyways.

Tuffnut chuckled to himself, before dropping down on the opposite bench, cradling Macey over his shoulder.

Fishlegs stood watching you for a moment, before perking up slightly. 

You turned your attention away from him, choosing instead to lay your head over your arms on the table. You didn’t care to register anything past that, even as Fishlegs began silent conversation with a new party, someone you barely sensed joined him through the loud hustle and bustle of the hall.

It took a while, but eventually you heard a familiar holler, followed by an exhausted declarative, “Food’s here.”

You lifted your head genially to reveal Snotlout, with a set of four plates balanced on his arm, one balanced between the horns of his helmet. Ruffnut followed closely behind, laughing at him.

“Snotlout!” You cheered.

Ruffnut poked his middle, causing him to nearly fumble your food as he balanced angrily past moving gaggles of Vikings. 

“Hey!” He snapped, “Watch it!”

She cackled as a group of running children, followed by Gustav, nearly ran him over.

“Oh, wow,” Came a voice from your left, “Never thought I’d see him do that.”

Your head jerked to reveal Hiccup, standing above you, watching Snotlout with mild amusement, though there was something stiff about him which you thought was very well deserved.

“That’s for sure,” Said Astrid with casualty, revealing herself from behind a set of women carrying two full plates of chicken to one of the larger tables, where clans preferred to sit together.

You grimaced slightly and turned away, leaning back against the meal table behind you, elbows propped against wood. 

Then cringed as they eyed each other with mild apprehensiveness from opposite sides of the table, then rolled your eyes and scooted away slightly as you spotted Snotlout, who had finally made his way over, Ruffnut dropping a roll of thick, hastily carved spoons on the surface. 

You cringed as they clattered across wood, picking one up and rubbing it with your sleeve.  

“You have to get your own food,” Snotlout scoffed at the two plus Fishlegs as he finished unloading plates onto the table. 

“Thanks, Snot,” You batted your lashes at him falsely as he gagged, ignoring the odd, caught-off guard look from Hiccup as you glanced back.

You fought the urge to gnash your teeth at him.

“But…” Fishlegs started, staring at the plate that had once previously been on top of his head. But you knew he’d have no luck. As always, Snotlout managed to negotiate himself an extra bit of food on top of his already loaded plate.

You noticed, with glee, that your plate was loaded with a little extra stew than normal. Something Plegma usually only did for the Riders.

“Nice,” You said, somewhat pleased, lifting your brows slightly and grinning from ear-to-ear, slouching back further against the table before taking a small bite.

“Food could be better,” You said snippishly, as you nudged the stew around your bowl with a spoon, resting your mug against the table and tugging it towards you with your other hand.

“Ugh,” Ruffnut rolled her eyes.

“Stick-in-the-mud,” Snotlout agreed, though not with cheer, looking at Tuffnut with a sneer as he scratched himself in the armpit.

You blew a raspberry at them, before frowning.

Maybe you had been grumpy. 

You glared at Hiccup from the corner of your eye, a move that might look coy on someone else, though you personally just felt a little bit queasy, as if a horde of bugs had started buzzing up and down your intestines, angry as you.

What had happened- you weren’t sure it was even an argument -maybe it was- but you could have gotten over it, maybe. Going over it with Tuffnut, though, had broken something in you that you hadn’t realized you’d been building back up hanging out with one half of the Riders.

You sighed shakingly, as you finished another swallow, bringing your mug down genially. It settled on to the table by your side with a simple clack, before pushing off against the table, swinging your legs over the side.

You felt the tension in your chest release as you moved across the hall, not expecting anyone to follow.

You weaved through the throng of the Great Hall clumsily, though not without experience. One hand held your elbow, the other the handle on your mug.

Your goal was, of course, to refill your cup, though that also had the slight upside of taking you away from the Riders.

You’d gotten sick of watching them all talk together, and to be honest, you were feeling a little out of place.

People milled by, momentary, uninterested onlookers to your conversation, by the side of a lunch table; a sturdy, tall woman with red hair piled up into a huge knot, a man in a helmet with four horns knocking people aside with his elbows, large trays in hand.

A lady with a shawl passed by, covered in the skulls of small animals swept by, nearly knocking you in the head with a wooden tray, speaking loudly to someone on her other side.

Looking back, you couldn’t help thinking about how you would have loved this if you’d been just a few years younger.

Sure, you were only friends with a few of them, but-even if you weren’t at the forefront of the crowd, you always imagined you’d feel like the girl of the hour. Maybe it would have been better because of it. Sure, you were living on a small rock island in the middle of nowhere, constantly showered on by torrents of hellfire and bloodshed, but you had Hiccup.

The Riders were his dream, so being ditched felt like he was telling you to kick rocks. Like he wanted you to feel miserable. Deep down thought, you’d wanted his dream- You’d wanted to be there too.

You’d had Hiccup in those daydreams, those dreams within dreams, casual and there and real enough like goats milk on skin, like falling asleep with hands carding through your hair after a long day.

You were incensed. You wanted to cry and yell, but you also felt terrible. The feeling built high in your stomach.

You wondered if anyone else took notice. 

You had never quite spent time with all of the Riders at once, and were quite adverse to the idea. The more you thought about it, the more you were even less inclined to stay than before.

You paused at the brush of a palm over your shoulder, loose and without any sort of grip, yet feeling enough for you to take notice, stopping suddenly. 

The hairs on the back of your neck stood. If you’d had hackles, they would have been raised.

“Hey, wait, where are you going?” It was a bit difficult to hear over the rabble, the crowd around you built up by voices much stronger than his or yours with personality and enthusiasm, yet you were able to make it out, a voice you knew by heart all the same.

Hiccup.

You turned and reached behind you, feeling the edge of a table bump into your rear. You leaned against it, racing your hand down slightly behind you to brace and dust over its surface.

The grain of the table was lumpy under your fingers yet smoothes by years of use and the grazing passes of many other hands.

“Why do you care?” You grumbled, arms falling loosely from their cross. You were nearly surprised when he heard you after.

“Why do I care?” Hiccup shook his head, “...What’s going on?”

You nearly missed the last bit, his voice nearly drowned out by the shout of someone two tables over. It was quite difficult to hold up an argument in the middle of a crowd, it seemed.

“Nothing,” You said, in lieu of an explanation, irritation spiking in your gut.

“It’s not.”

At that moment, the large arm of a blonde man nearly pushed him onto the table aside.

You fought down the urge to smile, looking down and feeling pretty malicious.

On the floor, you were greeted by a half-eaten leg of meat lay bitten into and discarded a few lengths away from you, a puddle of what was either stew or something you didn’t want to think about just further ahead.

You grimaced and scuffed a single loose boot toe into the Great Hall stone, annoyed, not surprised at all when it slid smoothly against the surface.

“What are you getting at?” You asked antagonistically. You felt stupid, dancing around him, mostly because you didn’t want to be talking to him at all. 

Was it arrogant for you to want to get away? Was this conversation penance, punishment for your earlier outburst?

You couldn’t help but wax poetically about it in your head.

“What am I-?” That seemed to do it -tick him off, that is.

“I can’t really read that mind of yours, genius.”

“Maybe if you stopped spending so much time with Snotlout-” Hiccup stepped forwards.

You snapped, gritting your teeth and stepping closer, feeling your nails dig into your palms through the fabric of your skirts, clutched in your hands,  “What’s your deal been?! I’m friends with Snotlout. What’s the big deal?!”

“I-...” He started, looking frustrated, though his eyes darted to the side slightly, “I just-”

“Gods,” You grit your jaw, bringing your hands to your head, not flinching when a few drops of mead spilled out the other end of your mug.

You didn’t show it, but you felt terrible. 

You hated the way his brows tilted, the momentary expression of grief on his face- yet you just wanted him to leave you alone.

[desultory-novice]

Sir Uther walks up to Noir Fontaine with purpose, having his usual happy-go-lucky smile and perky attitude. It was a surprise to see yet another human in this tournament ...well, atleast human-like. He instinctively reaches out for a handshake, eyes locked on Noir's face.

"Are you human?! MY~! I only ever saw the other one named Jade! Unlike her, you seem to be named after a color in french! Do tell, are there still any left of your species? Or are you all nearly extinct? Do you also have a history with Dark Matter in particular? I have so many questions~!! ☆"

His crystal eyes twinkle in delight, this truly was an opportunity to gain so much useful knowledge!

"Oh! And that entity, Zero as well! Does she exist in your world?"

"Hi! Wow! You're big! Bigger than I thought you round guys got!" 

Noir greets you with a boyish smile, though... ...He does not accept the handshake.

"You look like one of those Galactic Soldier Alliance people! I wrote fanfic about you! I can't let you read it because it's really cringe, but that's only cause when I was young I dreamed of being a hero, so...if you're ever recruiting, let me know maybe?! I'm not all that strong... but I'm passionate and have a strong sense of justice and somehow, I've got a lot of experience handling situations where all the evidence you killed anyone is gone because their bodies just disperse into matter once they're dead enough and the snow hides all the blood!"

[cw: mild body horror below]

"...What was I saying? Oh, yeah! I'm human! Whoa, there's another human here too? I should've figured that out, huh? I feel like I've been in a daze since I got here (or maybe even longer than that) and have been having a really hard time paying attention to stuff till lately when it all started coming back into my head REALLY FAST!"

"?! Do you speak French?! My mom taught my sister and me a little French and Japanese, cause of our ancestry, (what's my dad? I don't know! Maybe he's French-Japanese too?!) though we mostly speak Global at home. My name's supposed to be in Global but it's pretty cool that it means something in French too. 'Dark.' Sometimes I wonder if I was named after my hair? Though my sister's is the same color, pretty much, so that couldn't be it. Probably a coincidence?"

"Speaking of, my sister's human too and she's still around! We're separated right now, but my little brother's with her! (He's Dark Matter, since you brought it up! Yeah, he's adopted, but he's my little brother and if anyone says anything mean about him, I'll ****** them!) They're surrounded by friends too, so I don't worry!"

"It was really hard to get off the planet last time I was there, and it was getting pre~tty cold and people who got left outside tended to disappear till next year when you could find them again thawing out on the road but it's hard to imagine we've just gone extinct! I mean, the people from the New World had to have gone somewhere!"

"Hmm? Z...e...?"

"...r...." "...o...!?"

"M-muh...M-Mas..." "...pl...ea... ey...e...c-can....t... "...bre...athe...."

-

Noir clutches his throat. The dark, burn-like cracks on his skin that had been easy to ignore till now seem to crawl up, to his chin and beyond. A thick metal collar around his neck, barely visible between his gloved hands, hums with a dark violet glow before he passes out.

Elsewhere, an otherwise unremarkable looking sword in the stolen stash of a small Dark Matter begins to vibrate, seeking its host.

@kirbyoctournament

PS: Wisp belongs to @moonsharkss and while he's still in the lead this round, it's close, so if you want to give him a vote...!

(Help I forgot his hands!)

-

Noir's Field Trip Masterpost

-

AN: Welp, add another one to Sir Uther's body count/list of crimes...

So, I still have some "Cheerful" (...although more like his brains have been scrambled) Noir asks to answer/send out that I'll get to when I have time (writing him is a bit exhausting tbh... ) but I have gone ahead and drawn this to "progress" back to the main tourney story! (You didn't think he could stay this way forever, did you?)

TLDR, We're back to regular Noir (...or whatever other AU hijinks happen to come his way that affect him in some manner?! Magic anons...???) but if you wished to interact with or send another question to Noir explicitly during his short lived cheerful phase, lemme know! Though whether I get to it will depend on how I'm feeling ^^

-

(...Fwiw, I'm pretty sure if he stayed this way for too long, the emotional cascade would eventually give him a full on mental breakdown as his refreshed, innocent psyche finally catches up with processing all the traumas that made up his life.)

[harocat]

Perhaps this is inaccurate, but does it ever feel to you like general cdrama fandom takes the FL being a “mature” character as the end-all indicator of the show’s quality? Recently with legend of Shenli I see quite a few people start their praise along the lines of “unlike those other garbage xianxia with their annoying FLs”. And often it becomes clear they’re trashtalking Lbfad specifically

This is not just Cdrama fandom, it's fandom on the whole; the girlbossification of female characters.

I've generally always favored characters that get this treatment. Riza Hawkeye (badass) vs. Winry Rockbell (immature), Sango (badass) vs Kagome (immature). Sorry those examples are anime, but they're very well known so 🤷

These are also often healer characters, which is a trope that tends to be... sort of maligned. How dare a women be relegated to just being a healer! But IDK, I'd rather have a well written healer than a generic, flatly written warrior any day. XLH would definitely fall under the healer class.

(One good thing I've noticed is that while all the above mentioned girls got a lot of hate back in the day, as time has gone on, they've grown to become beloved characters. You rarely see hate for any of them nowadays. It's great.)

Keeping in mind fandom's general disinterest in women, so naturally the appreciation that does exist is often extremely shallow. Characters that tend to catch their attention because of this are ones that are 'badass' or that they want to 'step on them' or whatnot. A character that starts out more mature is more likable to them because they don't need to look beyond the surface to see how 'cool' she is.

This is not an implication that Shenli is a shallow character (I am only on ep twelve, so I'm not here to give any kind of overall impression), but just that she from the beginning has more traits that are easy for people to glom onto as a 'strong female character' Do these specific people (this is obviously not all fans of Shenli) who say 'finally a mature character' write meta about Shenli? Do they gush on her and share fanworks and create and all the like. Generally no, because in my experience people who like characters for 'girlboss' reasons don't really appreciate them beyond the surface.

These people will gripe about characters like XLH, sing the praises of 'strong female characters', then go back to only caring about male characters 90% of the time.

Xiao Lanhua takes too much work for these kinds of fans. Obviously we know she is strong, we know she is badass and brave, but the XLH we meet at the beginning is silly, immature, and boy crazy. To appreciate her character fully, you have to do more than just look for five seconds and go 'wow badass'. She's a layered, richly written character, but she doesn't start out as the kind of character that fits a girlboss reading.

On the other hand, almost because of this, you can find pages and pages of meta, fic, and fanworks about her, and almost any fan of hers can give you a plethora of reasons they love her that have actual depth.

On the subject of maturity, it's often a case of the kind of immaturity that's acceptable. Dongfang Qingcang is deeply immature at the start of the series. I don't need to explain why.

But his immaturity is appealing to fandom; cute, likable, and funny. It's good immature, cool immature. And I think this is because in addition to being a male character, we're also taught that being immature like Xiao Lanhua is--- is like... a horrible thing to be? But that's not the case at all. It's just normal! Again, back to girlboss feminism. Women and female characters are held to an impossibly high standard. Female characters that act in a way that might be seen as cringe (if they aren't also badass)? Yikes.

Yes, Xiao Lanhua starts out flighty and silly, but she's also a hard worker, and even from the beginning, she's courageous (despite her timidity when confronted with bullies). She's a good character, even at the beginning; she is lovable, charming, and so, so funny. People just refuse to see beyond their first impression.

The goal in writing a female character should be to make them well written, and in that sense, Xiao Lanhua is a great character. She just happens to also be extremely brave and badass, but some people are too shallow to see it. At this point in time I don't even argue with XLH haters. I'm just like 'well fine, I'd rather not have you here anyway.'

[aingeal98]

so, steph in the canon text choose to carry her pregnancy to term and give her child up for adoption. this is generally understood to be bc the writer of that issue/run was pro life, but taking the text at face value, what does it say that steph chose what she chose? is it coherent with her character? could it be read as another symptom of internalized mysoginy? or is it incoherent with her character/would it be more thematically interesting to have her have an abortion?

Really really good question I've been mulling this over in my head for weeks. To answer the last question first, I honestly think the issue with the pregnancy arc is less about the choices Steph makes and more to do with how clunkily anti abortion Chuck Dixon is. Like I do think it's very possible to be fully pro choice but also unwilling to abort your own pregnancy. I fought alongside my friends to repeal the abortion ban in Ireland but at the same time I can never picture myself ever getting one, because for me the second I become aware of it it's real to me, not just a clump of cells. But I know full well that's just my own sentimentality and there's no scientific backing, like logically it IS just a clump of cells and also there's a whole patriarchal society dedicated to stopping women from having bodily autonomy, which is why I'd never try and push that belief on others or discourage them from whatever choice they feel is best. So basically I would struggle hard to ever do it, but if you want to, hell yeah abort that thang! No judgement from me or moral reasoning needed from you.

And because of this I could see Steph being the same. I could even see certain story beats playing out the same if they were allowed just a bit more nuance instead of being a conservative after school special. Steph lashing out at her mom and counsellor for suggesting an abortion, not because it's a Bad Thing to do but because it feels to her like her mom is already trying to sweep this under the rug like it never happened, and Steph herself hasn't even come to terms with it. Steph feeling isolated from her peers, again highly plausible it just needs better dialogue than what we got in the original. We could even have scenes of Steph grappling with the idea of an abortion, and wondering how much of her aversion to it is her own choice and how much is internalized misogyny. I think her arc of deciding to have the baby and give it up works best, although a well written abortion au would be super interesting to read.

So basically for me the choices Steph makes in the original run are very coherent with her character, and what actually makes it fall flat is the clunky dialogue and heavy handed anti abortion writing. If Steph was written by someone other than Chuck Dixon during that time, I could see her being pro choice while also being unwilling to abort the baby herself. And it could have been written with a lot more nuance and acknowledgement of what teen mothers go through, instead of just what Chuck Dixon thought Good Teen Moms should do and say in this filthy world of liberal values.

From what we got in canon, I'd say Steph probably grew out of the anti abortion mindset as she got older. I don't think she'd ever regret her decision, but I do see her looking back and cringing at some of the ways she acted because wow the internalized misogyny JUMPED out. And if she ever came across another sobbing teenager with a positive pregnancy test, I'd say modern adult Steph would make sure they knew all their options with zero judgement. And helping that young girl would probably dredge up a million different emotions that she would struggle to name.

So tl:dr, taking the text at face value Steph has boatloads of internalized misogyny specifically around abortion. But I don't actually think her choices are out of character, more so that the entire narrative is written less as a story and more as a moralizing conservative rant on pro life where everyone feels like a caricature. It would actually be quite simple to tweak the dialogue and clunky scenes and end up with similar character choices just... better written. Where her mom and counsellors aren't evil for suggesting abortion but Steph still feels hurt and lashes out anyway. Where her peers say the wrong things and leave her feeling alienated. Where she weighs her options and gets more narrative space to mull over all the consequences. It would be my preferred way to rewrite the arc, but there are a lot of changes that could be made and I'm open to reading about all of them.

Thank you for the ask! Sorry it took so long to respond I was chewing over the whole concept haha.

[oolhan]

Too Many Beds (Part 3)

wow, okay so I had been inactive for awhile (by inactive, I mean just scrolling through and reblogging all sort of everlark stuff). But surprise! We're now on part 3 of this reversed-trope au. Another surprise: I'm adding another chapter because I couldn't wait too long to share the first part of part 3. You can read part 1 and part 2. Without further ado, first scene of part 3:

Travel journals that have to-do lists prior to the travel itself tends to be on the idealistic side, like cruising for 7 days in a Mediterranean island or bumping into a famous celebrity. Katniss knows this for sure, so when she made a bucket list to check off for their European trip, she notes the most mundane things she wants to do. Realistic things that can easily be checked off.

Wishing longevity in front of Sagrada Familia (With Peeta)

See a street flamenco dance (With Peeta)

Collect post cards and stamps (Send to Prim’s apt)

She wrote the list with Peeta two days before they depart for Madrid, and looking at her journal now, she’s pissed off how every to-do had ‘with Peeta’ beside it. She’s also pissed off at how she can’t enjoy tasting an authentic Italian pizza in front of her because written on her journal is: True Italian pizza with Peeta.

And she’s barely eating it with Peeta.

He’s sat at the right end of the long table conversing with Madge across him while she’s beside Johanna on the left end, not obviously far from him.

Finnick and Annie decided to have a small dinner party at a fancier restaurant near the bridge where they were engaged and though Katniss can barely keep it together, she knows she must appear happy and excited and tries very hard not to give away a signature scowl. After almost ruining Peeta’s moment in capturing the proposal photo, she decided not to talk to him for the night and tag along with the others.

She glued herself to Johanna to signal him she doesn’t want to talk about it. For now.

So Peeta talks with Madge.

The pizza is really good, actually. It’s worth the price and all, yet it feels sand on her tongue as she thinks about the loaded question he shot her with before Finnick knelt on one knee.

Is it really about them sleeping? Is that why she feels miserable since yesterday? But they just slept together again last night, so…

She thinks it is the sleeping, but she can never admit that.

But why can’t she just admit it?

She lets an exasperated sigh and downs her beer even though she prefers champagne right now, or maybe something with vodka. She just doesn’t like to upset the accommodating old local waiter who insists on serving the pizza with beer.

“Okay brainless, after dinner you really have to spit it out,” Jo whispers beside her after calling for another beer.

“Spit what out?”

“I heard you arguing with Peeta a while ago and you suddenly made me your favorite person in the world to cling to. I bet Gale’s ass cheeks it’s something to do with Madge,” Jo’s smirk is taunting, and Katniss starts to cringe at how someone actually overheard them.

Not like they’re yelling.

“Well, we sorta bet. I bet 20 it’s something about you two sleeping,” Gale interrupts, leaning over Johanna’s shoulder and swinging a glass.

“You’re ridiculous. I don’t want to talk about this right now,” She thanks the waiter and quickly downs her second bottle for the night. She really wants something stronger than shitty Italian beer. She’s in Italy for god’s sake, why isn’t she devouring wine right now?

“Okay, just tell me if it’s Frenchie or cuddling,”

“you’re both sick.” Katniss spat.

They suddenly turned their heads as Finnick clears his throat and gather everyone’s attention. He was at the head of the table, left hand clinging to Annie’s.

“So, uh,” he turns to Annie for confirmation. “So, you whole lot luck out, I guess. We-uhm, wow, okay I’ll leave it to Annie.” He chuckles nervously.

Annie laughs, “Well, since most of our best friends are present here at this very table, Finnick and I decided to have an intimate wedding in Greece.”

There are surprise gasps and girly shrieks. Congratulations and questions thrown. Despite Katniss’ mood, she smiles at her friends’ sudden news.

“Since we’re in this trip together and Greece is our next stop, then why not make it official in front of you guys?” Finnick’s smile will tear his face in half.

“Yes, and gramma Mags also lives in Lindos right now, so we’re sending her a message to prepare,” Annie confirms, nodding to Finnick and the rest of the group.

Delly and Madge can’t contain their excitement and babble on about wedding matters of what to wear and what colors match the Greek Isles and what food to eat.

“Oh! Oh! Let’s go shopping for dresses before we leave,”

“Cinna has a designer friend here in Venice, I think—”

“Ladies! I think we should all toast first before diving into details,” Johanna stands up, beer in hand ready for toasting.

“To Finnick and Annie, may you always pleasure yourselves quietly through all your nights, because I’m one more Annie’s moan away from putting a gun in my mouth,” Johanna teases and gets exasperated sighs from everybody. Katniss tried not to snort.

“Jesus, Jo,” Finnick chuckles through.

“She’s not allowed to toast at our wedding,” Annie playfully spats.

Gale stands helping Jo out. “What she meant to say was, to Finnick and Annie, whose knots are tied even before time began and lives crossed. We all knew this day would come, so just be in love forever and,” Gale can’t help it and glances at Katniss, whom he knows every scowl by heart. He knows what’s been going on.  “Here’s to a lifetime of open hearts and honest confessions! Cheers!”

Katniss gulps from the implication and glares at them both.

“Hear, hear,” says Thom, the sound of clinking glasses resonates merrily through the table.

“To honest confessions,” she hears Peeta repeats at the end of his table which made her slide her eyes to him, only to find he’s staring right through her.

She pulls her eyes away from the tension and downs her beer.

Still shitty.

anddd read the rest of it here on ao3. See you for part 4😉

[the-irken-luxray]

Hellooo because I forgot about the whiteboard until like midnight of the expiration date I didn’t get the chance to gather final screenshots so many of people’s additions didn’t make the final post. These are all the most recent versions of the drawings I could find (and in some cases I had to edit them together)

Featuring additions from @/kursed-curtain, @/flowerbarrel-art, and numerous others (feel free to brag in the notes if you see yourselves!)

[ID 1: a bust of Jenny Coffield, a stick figure oc with short, wavy hair, a top hat adorned with multiple spheres, and a burn scar on her head, showing off a “top bomb”, a top hat shaped object with a fuse sticking out the top. Tagline text reads “it explodes in the shape of a top hat”. Around the bomb are golden sparkles and captions reading “SO COOL!”, “WOW!”, and “FUN SHAPE!!”. Below the bomb is a diagram comparing a standard cartoon bomb, captioned in red with “LAME” and an X mark, with the top bomb, captioned in green with “COOL”. To the left of Jenny is three Toppats sitting around a meeting table. Two Toppats look impressed, one saying “wow!” and the other saying “We should use that”. The third Toppat looks annoyed and says “This is a stupid meeting.” End ID]

This one is probably my fav out of the bunch, just for the collaboration aspect.

[ID 2: a full body doodle of Reginald Copperbottom grinning evilly while holding a gun. Blue text reads “autism be damned my boy can kill”. A small doodle of someone’s Toppat sona or OC fawns over Reginald with multiple floating hearts. They have a bullet behind them with a red trail mark, as though they were shot with Reginald’s gun. Adjacent is a generic stick figure who is getting shot in the head. Text pointing to the stick figure reads “the cringe”. Yellow writing reads “ding dong the wicked cringe is dead”. End ID.]

At least one Reginald is mandatory. People got silly with this one.

[ID 3: a mouthless stick figure looks confused and mildly uncomfortable while looking at the viewer. Text next to them reads “my darling”, “precious blorbo”, and “beloved”. Below the text is a blob with eyes and no mouth in a happy expression, with writing reading “blorbo!” The stick figure is holding up a sign that says “I am literally just text????” End ID.]

Okay yeah you should know who this is by now

Gave them a Wile E. Coyote type sign because it fits the whole “no mouth can’t speak” type thing they’ve got going on.

[ID 4: a doodle of Jenny’s head with text reading “Your Toppat weapon ideas HERE!” Below is a drawing of Pike Cassino, a stick figure with a top hat decorated with slot machine wheels and horns, a gold tooth, and whiskery facial hair. a speech bubble pointing to him reads “Maybe a gun that doesn’t blast me back when I fire it…” Below the prompt text is a doodle of a glittering, gold cannon labeled “solid gold cannon”. Next to it is Jenny looking annoyed with a thought bubble reading “At least I’m paid well”. End ID.]

There were a LOT more additions to this prompt than I ended up grabbing, but with how spread out they were, there would be an additional five screenshots or so just to get them all.

[ID 5: a bust of Jenny waving an aromantic flag with a caption reading “aro gang”. Next to her is a drawing of a character labeled Harley, who has a heart shaped top hat and bangs, with a Toppat clan logo on their jacket and a paw on their hand. Harley waves to Jenny and is captioned with “aro gang!” End ID.]

Another that is sadly a lot smaller than its final version. The aro gang used to be bigger.

[ID 6: 3 images of a doodle of Ellie Rose. First image is of a head shot of Ellie. Second image is text reading “world’s smallest Ellie” with an arrow pointing to an indistinguishable doodle. Third image is the previous doodle zoomed in to show a very small head shot of Ellie, approximately the size of the tip of the arrow. End ID.]

World’s smallest Ellie.

[ID 7: A whiteboardfox drawing with a thick border around it, as though it’s an external image that’s been copy-pasted. The drawing is of Burt Curtis, a stick figure with headphones and a top hat, stylized. Here he has messy, wavy, short hair and highlights in his eyes. He’s reading a magazine titled “#3 ACTion”. To the left is a frog-with-glasses icon with text reading “gotta get sillier with my art”.

To the right of the copy-pasted drawing is a frog with glasses on his hands and knees, with the glasses lenses opaque to hide his eyes. Text below reads “just found out my drawing didn’t save can’t have shit on whiteboard”. End ID.]

Yeah so I was… struggling with this one. The frog in the top left was originally a thing I tried to add to ALL my additions up make them easier to find. But because of WiFi issues, not only did none of them save, but half my Burt drawing was gone too. Fortunately, because I was already struggling bad with it, I had the foresight to screenshot the drawing once I was done with it.

[ID 8: a doodle of Reginald Copperbottom with his hands on his hips while smoking a giant blunt. To the right is a drawing of Reginald in the family guy death pose with a caption above reading “bad at smokign” [sic]. Below the whole thing is text in parentheses reading “(whiteboard if you’re gonna react my art please for the love of god let it be this one)”. End ID.]

Drawn immediately after the previous one. No further context needed.