#wouldnt you like and now dangerous?
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Alright...
*coffee machine making coffee noises*
Yall are getting more Icarus & Midas content as them as Odysseus & Hermes.
Wouldn't you like okay coded but DANGEROUS?!? HELLO NECESSARY RISKS? WHAT R YOU DOING HERE?
Dangerous you- you tasty mother fucker
ARARARA
#european time zone how i loath you but oh i love you when it comes to epic#wouldnt you like and now dangerous?#chat im just a silly lil blorbo#i wanna yell but ive gotta wait for everyone else minus the kiwis and the aussies#fable smp icarus#icaurs morningstar#fable smp midas#quixis#sherbverse#sherbertquake56#latte needs to shut up sometimes
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Stottlemonk Moments:
Monk s06ep16: "Mr. Monk Is on the Run: Part 2"
#stottlemonk#stottlemeyer x monk#monk season 6 ep 16#mnk06#i wish they went a bit more in depth about people being suspicious of how stottlemeyer was barely phased about killing monk#or more scenes with stottlemeyer trying to act devastated#the last time he thought monk died he had a total breakdown and threatened to quit his job if monk didn't get a full service funeral#and anytime monk is in danger he goes batshit#and now in this case not only did monk die.. he died by stottlemeyer's own hands#so by all accounts stottlemeyer should be acting way more broken up#but he barely grieves and is even still able to work normally#i feel like people would have thought that was very strange#randy and natalie especially have seen first hand how deeply monk and stottlemeyer care for each other#so i feel like they'd be asking way more questions or wouldnt have been fooled so easily or idk.. something like that#i know natalie says “this must be harder on you than anybody” but i need MORE depth#just rambling
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MiqoMarch Day 23 - Midnight
With their intended voyage into the void only a few days out, Arsay thought it the upmost importance that she steal her partner away to Kugane, that they might share one more fond memory together should things not turn out the way they plan in the thirteenth. It was as they crossed the very same bridge the miqo'te had once sat on together two years prior when Arsay gifted Y'shtola with a bracelet matching that of her own. A token of endearment which, Arsay confessed, she would have given to her fellow scion back then, had nerves not gotten the best of her. While their relationship has undoubtedly changed since the initial purchase of the jewellery, the sentiment remained the same. Y'shtola was someone who Arsay loved dearly and she will forever be grateful to have the seeker's life intertwined with her own. No matter where their free spirits took them, they would always hold each other in their hearts. A promise Y'shtola was more than willing to keep. She slipped the the string of beads around her wrist without a second thought. They were never to come off, not even when the two decided to delay their return to Radz-at-Han in favour of a private bath at the dead of night.
#miqomarch#miqomarch 2024#ffxiv#y'shtola rhul#y'shtola x wol#wolshtola#arsay nun lore#arshtola#thanks to nhaneh for the body mod#i had to do some insane fov to get the moon and them in the same shot so sorry for the distortion#forcing arshtola lore into this prompt since idk when Ill ever get around to gposing the actual scene#this is between 6.1 and 6.2!#endwalker patch spoilers#i had the idea that arsay bought the Dai-ryumyaku bracelets from a vendor between 4.3 n 4.4 when shtola is off to the doman enclave#and arsay is like hey wait you should let me show you around kugane on the way over!#a fun friend date that ends with shtola finally accepting she has a crush on arsay and its terminal#and arsay having a single moment where she starts reflecting on feelings & thinks maybe she missed hanging out w/shtola more than she shoul#only to quickly butt that idea out of her head and continue being super normal#arsay notices these matching bracelets with red and purple string and shes like oh they are so cute and they look like#they belong in a pair it would be so sad if they were ever split up unexpectedly#i know ill buy them and give one to shtola wouldnt that be fun!#so she does that and then cant bring herself to give yshtola the damn thing because she starts second guessing herself#so arsay stashes the bracelets away and she started wearing hers later under her glove#fast forward to two years later and arsay finds the other one in one of her bags#and now shes dating yshtola and they are about to go somewhere super dangerous#what better time to tell your gf how much they have always meant to you#and what better way to do it than with a gift and some words spoken from the heart?#it was a little unconventional since arsay didnt really have marriage on the mind but it was a proposal in a sense#WOL posting#Arsay Nun
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the bad: i have been raised without much warmth from my parents in childhood, but also pressured to conform to familial authority, doubt myself always, and value familial connections above all else (<- failed at this, and feel guilt about it.)
but also in experiencing this i have been so isolated from the entire rest of the world and others, that it will be nearly impossible to create my own "family" -> find safety and comfort in anybody else once my family is Gone. despite dis i find it really difficult to break away from the familiar, disobey and disappoint, because, well, why are my wishes more important than anybody else's. why would I cause upset and distress in anybody, and exert so much effort into my doubt filled half decisions, for my meaningless little Wishes. being away would also mean less time with these people who I'll never see again once they're gone. being raised this way is definitely paying off for those who did so.
the good: yaaaay adjacent inspiration for writing talon lore
#talkys#my dad scaring me but also giving me no advice on what to do instead only saying if i do this it will be the wrong choice leading#to more wrong choices well yep you got me i am scared. i am inept. i fear regret and punishment for wrong decisions.#i struggle to make decisions because i cant go back on them.#''ill never have savings again'' and ''you cant value friends over family they'll abandon you''#and ''living here is only a problem for you because you dont communicate. there is a way to work things out''#i wish i could work it out and stay i dont know why i cant work it out ! and what do i want#to leave so badly for... to continue to never have stable housing#never have savings again? be alone and in danger?#to be able to wear whatever i want and...buy things? really? that doesnt seem very worth it#nothing seems very worth it#im miserable here but maybe i'd be more miserable away...it is true#well at least the chances to leave are very slim. and will continue to get slimmer the more time passes.#but maybe its fine i dont want to ruin my life or be even more of a burden or reason for distress in someone else's#moving out wouldnt fix anything. wherever you go there you are.#my friend said i have to be a little selfish (positive) to push myself to leave. bt i dont want to be selfish. im ashamed of that as a trai#delete later#even now i feel immense guilt and stress when my dad does things that hurt or bother me bc i know ill miss him when he's gone.#(and ill have nobody after all of that. due to the being kept in a cage)#that sucks. why does everyone else always win. why am i always the weakest pliable one. i wish i had no emotions#my surgery is the only decision in my life ive been 100% sure on for years#and even then my parent's words had me crying and rapidly changing emotions daily until the day came#im not strong enough or sure enough about anything else to withstand More of that#<- and i know that tomorrow im gonna be like actually you know what who cares lets try to leave#and the next day ill be resigned to staying here forever#and the next day ill be like actually you know what who cares l
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Sailom and Tae Myung Ha motivating their boyfriends Dangerous Romance (2023) x Love For Love's Sake (2024)
#idk either guys but my brian wouldnt leave me alone till i made it so here you go#you happy now @ brian??????????#now shut up#there are probably million other shows to compare LFLS to i didnt even like DR#dangerous romane the series#love for love's sake#kanghan x sailom#tae myung ha x cha yeo woon#bl parallels#favorite scenes#episode 4#blmpff
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also slowly turning around in my brain how rose said she was going to stay with the doctor forever, and then later donna says the same thing (to martha!! the doctor doesnt even hear or know!!! it would make him so happy but hurt him so much if he did!!!!!!), and then when she tells the doctor shes going home in sontaran stratagem he immediately assumes it means shes leaving him for good and accepts it but also launches into all the things he still wanted to show her.
and i know its played for a joke like haha silly martian thats not what i meant! but this is the same man who, when he needed to turn human, loved someone SO DEEP AND HARD that he didnt think he'd ever fall in love again. ever. even with his memory erased. so when you take that moment of "oh you're just popping home for a visit" and like ACTUALLY look at it you're like. this man gets so so so attached to people, and is so incredibly scarred by losing these people he loves that he has no choice but to let them go when they want to leave on good terms, because he knows how bad it could get for them if they stay, no matter how much he wants them to stay.
anyway donna's forever and rose's forever are just different flavors of the same "i need you as much as you need me, so im in it for the long haul, bad stuff included" and its chefs kiss
#doctor who#dw#nuwho#donna noble#rose tyler#tenth doctor#by me#dont skip nine#i just. i have so many thoughts about donna i cant even get them all down#ill probably need another post about this#but i just LOVE how much she takes those classic Rose Things and turns them on their heads#donna travels with the doctor bc she has nothing else just like rose did#but while rose traveled so he wouldnt be lonely and through that company he learned to be humane#donna travels with him to keep him humane and through that company he starts to heal from his grief of being lonely#if that makes sense#when rose was there he always did things for HER and it was so dangerous for both of them and scarred them more than it could have#and now with donna its like nah man do it for THEM. you cant live for your companions. you gotta live for you and the people you save#ok i think im done now
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not gonna lie I sometimes feel strange posting baldi art in 2023. Like I know is not my fault that I didn't know about fandoms and stuff but seeing some old posts of fans having fun when baldis basics was so popular and posting arts and stuff and seeing people interacting with each other with their baldi blogs and...i don't know. I feel like I missed so much fun. I feel like a fake fan because I didn't join the fandom sooner and when I see people mention some events that happened in the fandom I just. can't say anything because I wasn't there (or either I don't remember that much?)
#tbh i wouldnt even be here if it was not bcuz of friends and some people encouraging me to keep drawing even tho my old drawings sucked ass#like i know it doesnt matter if you join a fandom late but damn ggrgrgrrg!!!!#but i think thats good bcuz i was so much younger when the first game came out -#i cant imagine the horrors of internet danger.#i was busy watching comic dubs 😔#now whenever i post baldi art i feel like that scene when Spongebob tells a tomato joke and everyone is like. silent 👽#yeah i went stalking to a baldi blog who reposted baldi related through all way 2018 (worst mistake)#now when I see a baldi blog theyre either desactivated or abandoned which. i understand. lack of interest...!#i just kind of wish i was present when those blogs were created#also uh. sorry for this i hope yall understand ��#talking :0)#i think i may delete later...? idk
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Thinking about one of the loser men I dated directly post-college who, after I showed them Dirty Computer [the emotion picture] by Janelle Monae, said they "prefer rap that has something to say"
#this person identified as a man but used they/them pronouns just in case that was confusing#but yeah like. what does that mean. did you watch the video#also one time said colorado edibles were 'too strong' and therefore 'dangerous'#they said that COLORADO should have more 'regulations' imposed on weed products lmfao#also when i was watching mad men and expressed that i liked it#they were like 'i dont see the appeal bc the commentary feels obvious to anyone whos lived on the east coast' skskdkdkelsdnakas#they had the WEIRDEST complex about being from the east coast. like. most tightly wound person ive ever met in my life#who was constantly insisting they were sooo type b and so chill and go-with-the-flow#and like yeah im aware im from one of the most laid back slacker states#but this person was one of the most uptight people ive ever met let alone dated#and just had like 0 self awareness about it#like they would exclusively wear button downs sweater vests and cardigans. wouldnt be caught dead in a hoodie unless it was northface#would only drink coffee if it was made from a french press#also see above story about edibles (which was the biggest 'fight' we ever got in bc i was like what the fuck r u talking about)#like. the label says clearly how much thc cbd etc is in each edible and how many doses there are per container#what else could you want#if you dont know how itll affect you just take half or even a quarter of one first???#this still gets me heated to think about#but yeah like what kind of person sees DIRTY COMPUTER and is like 'hmm not political enough' lmfao#OH ALSO guess why we broke up#the blm protests happened and they said they were just 'too affected by police violence to be dating right now'#(they were very much white. blonde white)#and then i found out 11 months after we broke up that they had started dating a poc a month before we broke up#because i saw an anniversary post they did and i was like '...wait a minute'#and a friend of mine used to work with them after we broke up and according to him this person would constantly bring up what a great 'ally'#they were for dating a poc#fucking. wild
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I will kiss moon's boo boo better and get mauled in the progress <3
NOOO BONKIE DONT KISS MOON BETTER HE'S GONNA GET YOU!! NOOOOOOOO BOONKIEE
#ask kandidandi#bbonkie#im pretty sure this is in relation to ysf hahgsfdghsfdghsfdgh#if it isnt sorry bout that#anyways#i like to think the months moon spent hiding he was fixing his code#so like instead of the virus being 90% there or something now its only 10%#so he probably wouldnt maul you#but he'd still feel he's too dangerous to touch you
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a fellow english major, really happy to see someone who's proud of their degree <3
you know that "no love, no matter how brief, is wasted" line? i think the same applies for knowledge too - no matter how useless it may seem, knowledge acquired is never in vain.
#honestly like. idk what your age is but when i was attending uni i kept getting told that i shouldve gone for IT. because the future#- and the money - is there.#now look at the IT companies. the whole thing is crumbling#not to mention the arrogance. that IT degree didnt make you immune to the same old scam tactics did it. how are your nfts doing btw#honestly i never really expected it myself that a humanities degree would prove useful in a daily life type of way#like. sure i knew it wasnt useless but still. its entirely different to experience it in real time yknow#and the whole new wave ''it isnt that deep'' trend is honestly pretty dangerous bc there usually IS something deeper.#a narrative an agenda a propaganda etc.... or simply just capitalist greed#so its needed to read between the lines and see what the point/intention really is#- and thats what literary and other art analysis is making you do! it makes you stop and think#this is all not even mentioning all the political historical and cultural stuff we learned about all the anglo-saxon countries#which all prove to be pretty useful in light of recent events......#so yeah. anyway. dont listen to all those who say its useless (and theres a lot of those even among the ones who chose this major too)#its clearly not. but even if it were it wouldnt matter ehat they think#(i do wish tho that i couldve attended it already on the right meds bc i feel like i forgot A Lot bc of my mental state at the time#but oh well. what can you do)#thank you for the ask it was really nice of you 💞💞💞#ask#anon
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you ever get to the point where you start believing everyone about there being something inherintly wrong with you for something as stupid as your eating disorder.
i literally cannot help the fact that i eat things i really shouldnt im sorry okay stop getting upset at me for it
#cw pica#pica#tw: ed#eating disorder#so many times i will accidentally tell my friends like i ate some really nice paper or a really crunchy pen the other day#because thats somehting you wanna share yknow like it was so good#youd share if you ate some nice food wouldnt you#anyway then i usually get the whole 'its wrong and bad you need to stop right now' lecture#i try to stop but it literally distresses me to not be chewing on something#and i usually end up swallowing things that i chew on im sorry#like i get it if i eat dangerous stuff like glowsticks but i cant help it#i just want my friends to stop shaming me for something i literally cannot help because im struggling
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Girl like. The reason he said "this is how it should be" and faced death with a smile....is cuz he wanted to die. For 2 years he sat there thinking he was worthless and deserved to die. If he hadn’t be shot, his death would’ve been suicide, he was fully planning to die in a gutter somewhere undetected. When saying "this is how it should be" hes literally saying "don’t cry because I’m dying, my death is a good thing actually because I fucking suck and you are better off without me". I don’t think that’s badass even slightly, it’s actually really sad and really shitty. Shinjiro is so convinced that he deserves to die and hates the idea of anyone giving a shit about him because he literally can’t wrap his mind around the idea that he will be missed when he’s gone, that his death is a bad thing actually. And his last words were meant to be comforting because he fully did not intend for anyone to be there when he died, he intended to die alone, so he says them as a reminder that he’s not worth crying over
Personally, if it were me, if I was holding my dying best friend in my arms who was deeply depressed and suicidal and he said "this is how it should be" uh. I wouldn’t admire him for it??? Like am I losing my mind when I say the way this game handles Shinji is bad or is anyone else seeing this too 😰
#its like okay listen i understand the basic math of any persona game they say things and everything they say is actually#very bad when you think about it for more than 3 seconds#like what theyre intending to do with the death of this character is be like oh no your sad friend dies tragically thats so saddddd#but that doesnt mean you cant live a wonderful life full of meaning you cant let grief consume you life is beautiful awagga#and i guess shinji is a specific character whos used cuz i guess its more tragic that he never realized he was worthy of life and shit#and i guess its also like ‘dont be like this guy who let grief consume him and then died you gotta Be Different’#which i dont. love. that last part cuz if you think about shinji and what led him down this road#its like. of course hes depressed! he accidentally killed a woman with a child when he was 16!#he himself is an orphan and he just made some other kid an orphan as well and it happened cuz his persona went out of control#which very much can translate to ‘this must mean im dangerous and can hurt everyone if im not kept under control’#so of course he isolated himself and believed he was evil and became suicidal like who wouldnt feel that way#like am i supposed to be mad he left sees and took drugs cuz uh while i dont think isolation or Evil Drug is good for his mental health#i dont think him continuing to fight in sees is something he can just easily do again given how he killed someone like he shouldnt have to#be a part of this thing anymore like how would he even safely get castor to not do that??? he cant kill more people on accident!#so yeah like using shinji as an example of bad coping mechanisms is already just. a big fucking oof to me like it just feels like the game#is saying he shouldve gotten over it and simply not be suicidal and stayed on the team. idk if thats the intent but uh it wouldnt faze me#cuz persona games are notoriously awful at writing characters who are traumatized and abused#but what makes everything even worse is how the game kinda like. acts like shinjis death is a stepping stone#like we’re supposed to use it as a wake up call and understand the stakes but keep going on anyways#and akihiko and Ken get. ‘great character development’ according to the game telling you they have now developed#but damn all akihiko is is just repressed he cries for 3 seconds and then is like I SHOULD MAN UP and then neglects a depressed child#shinjis dying words are words to live by now even though they piss me the fuck off like girl am i crazy HES FUCKING#HES TELLING ME NOT TO CRY OVER HIM BECAUSE HE SHOULD BE DEAD ACTUALLY AND THIS IS A GOOD THING ACTUALLY#like if the game wants us to still find meaning in life despite losing someone it just really hurts that shinji has to die for that to work#apparently. cuz the character i see myself in is shinji. not some perfect prettyboy who does everything perfectly and has 4 gfs#his death seems like a punishment for bad behavior. the bad behavior being of course depression and drug use. and im simply supposed to be#better than that if i want to live. and we dont get to form a connection with him cuz thats gayyyyy#and his death is like a NOBLE HEROIC SACRIFICE idk its just such bullshit to me i hate it so bad#how is killing a suicidal guy and then treating it as admirable that he said ‘this is how it should be’ supposed to make me feel#makes me feel sick personally and it ruins the entire game’s theme to me because its fucking shallow and the story is bad and im tired
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my tumblr mobile app now for some reason has decided that if i try to click to view a post in a blocked tag instead of just showing me the post normally they. open the post on tumblr browser on the chrome app?? that being i dont even use chrome since i use the firefox mobile app on my phone. why are you doing this to meeee i have the tumblr app for that just show me the damn post on tumblr. what are you doing
#like i have tags blocked that i do click to view like i had ''long post'' blocked so it wouldnt clog my dash witha huge post#but id still click to view it to see what it was about. now i cant....... damned be you tumblr if do you like the color of the sky shows up#on my dash i am completely defenseless. i am in danger here#🧃.txt
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you don't have to read this is for screaming in the void
#trying to explain that i'm struggling without saying the big most important part of why i am struggling is .#like oh i'm struggling because uh . the issues. what are the issues? well . they are issues that i refuse to elaborate on#so it doesn't help anybody. but like how am i supposed to explain to my mom that the reason i've become so severely depressed is because#i'm suicidal. like oh btw ^-^ i hate the life you gave me and brought me into so bad that i want to die. but it's no big deal so don't worr#about it.#which like that wouldn't be how i meant it at all but of course that's also implied or something#which just makes me think of other things like that if things weren't so bad id be able to get help but help is inaccessible.#ughhhh i just hate this it's so agonizing. like cant things be a little less bad. i'm not having fun being like this and people are#reasonably irritated with me because only based on what i'm willing to tell just. isn't the full story at all and would obviously just.#not make sense because i'm leaving out major parts of what's happening and why.#and tbh i'm constantly going back and forth between like. coming out as suicidal. mainly because like. well. it kinda worrying me.#because for like months now i've almost daily been fighting off suicidal thoughts and often even having suicidal meltdowns#yesterday i was standing near a ceiling fan and was like hmm wouldnt it be nice if one of the blades came off and stabbed me through#the back of my skull and killed me. but then i thought no that would be too traumatizing for my family#as if me dying at all wouldn't be. which i also thought of. idk just thinking about the idea of#i want to live but not like this. because yeah. my mom said that she thinks reading bad news is why and it's like well . of course it is#but should i just stay completely unaware of what's happening in the world. but also bad news is just unavoidable#but yeah it is why i'm depressed. climate change racism homophobia transphobia covid wars economy etc like#these are things that i can't just. ignore? and am i seriously the crazy person for being upset about these things?#well she does think i'm crazy for still being scared of the dangerous virus that is currently the third leading cause of death in the us#like last night she was like ' it's good to be cautious but you're going over board' i'm friends with people who could die from covid.#'over board' i care about them and other people and i don't want them to die. i don't want to be permanently disabled by a virus with#a 20% chance every time i catch it to permanently damage my immune system and give me long covid. <- according to cdc#but whatever. i do genuinely want mental help. i think i need s different medication or a diagnosis bc uhmmm . i am unwell#but that's expensive.#i have an appointment with a doctor today for a med check because i don't think my ssri is working . obviously#as i am as you can tell absolutely overcome with severe and debilitating anxiety and depression. lolzors#whatever. except not because ouuuughhhgh <-unimaginable suffering#mypost
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can't find any good posts on it so I'll make it myself!
its okay to be upset you can't eat foods you want. its okay to be pissed as hell that every time it seems okay, you get a flare up. its okay to be fucking angry that something you love to eat causes you pain
be angry abt it! be mad that some stupid starch hurts you! be upset at all of those doctors who brush you off! be pissed about people in your life not taking it seriously!
food is an incredibly important part of everyone's lives and its frustrating and infuriating to have any sort of struggles with it. cry over it, talk about it, be loud. it is hellish to have any gastrointestinal disability and, diagnosis or not, you deserve to be able to find comfort in food
so to all of my fellow stomach sufferers, I hope you have a nice evening / morning / night and I wish you good meals and snacks in the days to come. I hope your body goes easy on you and your flare ups lessen, I hope the foods you are able to eat bring you comfort and enjoyment. and I hope when things do get bad, you can find solace with others who understand what you're going through <3
#I cannot count how many times I've cried over food#especially when its social#I think my earliest memory of crying about food was when I was ~12 and had just discovered i was lactose intolerant#and my mom got me an ice cream cake for my birthday#it felt like a cruel joke. and she didn't even understand why j was so upset until I explained it to her#I had to take lunches to school and prepare meals because nothing at school was safe to eat#and on days I didn't have the spoons for it I simply Wouldnt eat#it was so frustrating because one issue became two became four became more than I can count#and food has lost a lot of the comfort and enjoyment it once had because of all the pain#but know that even with setbacks it can get better#narrowing down one bad food after the other is so so fucking worth it just to make food not a chore anymore#there will always be bad days and there will always be new things that crop up as unsafe#but know that even if an old favorite food becomes dangerous that new favorites are out there#I used to love ham on everything but now I can't eat it without awful pain and allergic reaction#but even without that old comfort food I've found new ones like turkey sausage and pasta#just. dude feel free to cry about food#its not dumb jts not overreacting#food is important and its completely fucking worth sobbing over#to everyone with gut issues I wish you good luck o7 know that there is food out there that you'll love and won't hurt you#food tw
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by virtue of the GM having to play every NPC in contrast to every player having their one, it's fascinating the relationship dynamics this sets up in character throughout the narrative
#N posts stuff#specifically thinking about Caramelinda right now; you are a woman who was forced into a marriage after the love of your life died#your daughters Vastly and Openly love your husband more than you#you are Intimately aware of the dangers of the world and the roles that everyone in it is Forced to play and how important those roles Are#and your children Resent you for it. everything you try to do to keep them safe they Hate you for but you Cant Stop bc that wouldnt be Safe#and then your daughter dies; you thought she was safe in her bed and she wasn't. and now she's dead#and the child who brings you this news is still covered in your daughter's blood and accusing YOU of somehow inciting it#and your remaining daughter openly resents you for every move you make bc She thinks it's your fault too#she is still a child and telling you that if you had trusted them (As children) to not act as children do and if you had armed them with#magic that the lost love of your life taught you before she died; then maybe they would have respected you more and maybe they#would have listened to you then. or maybe they would have still ignored you but maybe they could have defended themselves#and maybe your daughter would still be alive. and this guts you. and then your husband looks at you take this wound and says#'can you give us a minute?' and shunts you off into a back room and this is the closure you get on this conversation#this isn't a critique btw it's the Nature of actual play and improv; i wouldn't even call it a Flaw#this isn't some Negative i'm pointing out it's just about the way the narrative reacts to this feature and the dynamics it incites#i love angst and drama and i like to peel characters apart like dissection. fascinating to me. <3
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