#woulda should coulda ya know

[theglamorousferal]

I fucking love all of this!!!

How would u rewrite Sam?

Well shit man you already saw my redesign lmao

Nah but seriously? There are 3 things i would change. 1 being her n tuck overlooked as much, 2 being used as a joke n stepping stone for danny, 3 I want her to really step into her characters history and development (cause redemption arcs are the bomb yes?), and 4 my personal headcanons of course.

~~~

1-the og trio

Ah yes, the three amigos, three peas in a pod, the three musketeers. Danny, Tucker, and Sam. They are my favorite characters to read about and personally? i ship them as poly, but thats the phanon trio. The canon trio aren't as defined as the phandom makes them out to be. Danny throughout the show is consistently a bamf, but he also kinda glances over his friends (just how many episodes had vital plot point being him taking advantage of his friends or having them take the downfall?) I would put Sam and Tucker in a much more prevalent role and really write out who they are as characters. We do of course have some already, from Tuck's Egyptian counterpart to Sam's dragon and plant forms, but we need to see them more as who they are. Just how many times can Tucker hack the government before he has to turn down plans cause he has a court hearing? How many protests can Sam drag the other two along to before they can quote the Miranda Rights by heart? What abandoned buildings do they explore outside of ghosty business (cause what Midwestern teen hasnt explored a corpse of a house)? Where do they dance to the latest underground music that matches dumpty humpty in feels? Give me their teenage shenanigans and who they are outside of ghosts.

2-the jokes

Sam is a really cool character to begin with; she's persistant and head strong, fights for her beliefs and friends, and she stands out in her town of Amity Park as one of the alt kids. Growing up she was an inspiration to kids like me who had nothing but the monotonous life that exists in Illinois, and it wasnt until i was older when i realized she was kinda made into a joke at some points. Namely being the ultra-recyclo-terian lifestyle in canon she has. Which is great, but at some point you gotta draw a line. She's been made a gimmick, something for people to laugh at cause she's basically vegan and that makes her different, more so than her outfits and pov from a money standpoint. Because the characters in the show brush her off, we pick up that being vegan is weird and not right but not left either. Its just, its setting a bad example for how we treat people who eat differently than the American standard. It dont matter what you eat at the end of the day. The writers kinda made it a part of her personality even though its not that big of a deal. Idk methinks that should be rewritten Heavily™️

3-who even Is Sam

Well, like i said earlier, she a headstrong, loyal to a fault, stubborn, goth character for better and for worse. Her character development was a good start. I liked how she was able to eventually reach a tenable toleration of the other characters like Paulina and Valerie (if im remembering correctly?). I liked how she was someone for kids to see and have in the back of their minds as someone to be like. However, parts of her character gets forgotten about too often; like she's jewish. Thats fucking cool as fuck. And when do they mention it? Offhandedly in a christmas episode, and the singular time we hear her grandmother say her nickname. Fuck it, I want her to celebrate Sukkot near halloween. I want to hear about the shenanigans that came with her bat mitzvah celebrations. What about Passover? What does she think of her relatives when they come over for The Good Food that comes with their feast after memoriam? Give me more jewish rep in general, but especially for Sam.

Aside from that, she needs more development in general. She was awesome to watch and even cooler when she ended up dating Danny at the end there, but she did Not receive nearly as much backlash for her choices as other did. Shes pretty hypocritical, and at the beginning thought herself much higher than the other characters. She did eventually cool down a bit but methinks she deserved a bit more arc there. Why didnt her and jazz have a verbal match in Girls Night Out, when Sam said Jazz didnt know how to handle ghosts? Why didnt her european conquest get brought up more after the fact, for teasing or for reasons why they shouldnt do X bad idea? Why was her narrative foil vilified for her femininity, and Sam's "not like the others" stereotype upheld for being better? She had faults, her character as written and her choices as played out. These faults werent emphasized nearly as much as they shoulda been.

4-personal headcannons

There are many things i like that the phandom itself has come up with, from the whole "ghosty weed parent means ghosty weed sam" to her eventual flower shop in amity park; dont forget her polycule of idiots, be that the trio or defect quartet. There are the big things like where she ends up in early adulthood, to smaller things like her favorite coffee being from a cat cafe she had exactly one (1) time, but there are things the phandom hasn't come up with, or at least not to my knowledge. (If you saw my character redesign, you might know whats coming)

Have you thought of punk Sam, instead of goth? What about wanderer Sam? What about a crustpunk trainhopping Sam, who rallies protestors in cities with corrupt police, who swigs bootheel moonshine she got from a rural grandma, who dances jigs in the Appalachias, who traveled when the ghosts finally calmed down a bit? Just imagine a Sam that has such a huge social media presence but is also a figurative ghost cause the average person cant travel like she does; there are communities out there who follow her and assumes she's a cryptid who's had it up to here with humanity (and these people don't even know about the Ghosts, the real ones).

I think she likes tattoos better than piercings cause a continuous steady burn is easier to sit through than a spike of metal. I think she despises kudzu (the plant) and sets it on fire if she sees a patch of it (controlled burning for local wildlife). I think she carries a small mossball from the early 2000s thats somehow still alive even tho shes forgotten and lost it twelve times over. I think, before she left for the rails, when her ma would drag her to dinner parties, she would talk the talk and walk the walk til the very end of the night, then she would call out the host on their latest exploitation and tell them the recordings she got at the party would be sold to the highest bidder in the morning. I think she'd bring home a stray kitten she found and name it fy, the yiddish word for fuck. I think she'd make hot vanilla instead of hot chocolate (fr tho if anyone needs a hot vanilla recipe i gotchu just hmu).

When interacting with teachers, she'd be the favorite until you got to history class; you'd leave that class with more understanding of how horrible america has been than you would ever think was possible in Illinois. The English department loves her and her takes on classics ("why read to kill a mockingbird and get a white savior complex when you could read the hate you give and get a much more realistic and accurate look at racism in modern america? Racism never died, so read the stuff you find more relatable. Also atticus Sucked Ass ™️").

Shes a morning person sure, but also a gym rat; shes there at 4am, running a mile and rowing for an hour while chugging orange juice and green supplements and youre in bed sleeping. She says hello to the entryway even if no ones there to hear it, she says not today to the hallway closet, she knocks twice on her window cause that's her routine when she gets home from school.

Theres so many small bits n bobs that i have for her i forget them right now. Overall shes an awesome character, just needs some touching ups. (Also i hope this is coherent for you, I've been at work since noon and got off just before midnight, sorry if it isnt ill edit in the morning :) )

What about yall? How would you rewrite her?

[instarsandcrime]

Returning the Favor (3/4)

Thank you for waiting!!!

Whoof, here we go! I love Hu//sker//Du//st, so admittedly this was much easier to write. ^ ^" Regardless, now we've got Caretaker!Angel Dust and the reason Sick!Husk exists in the first place. Thank you very much for reading this far, and I hope you enjoy!

---

“--sk?”

The black, unconscious void began to flicker and fade.

“Husk?” A familiar voice called again.

An endless dream finally cleared, nothingness making way for rose-colored eyes and adorable freckles that decorated them like stars.

Damn Cher, Husk thought distantly, you could make the sappiest love poems outta the most heartless bastards. Y’know that?

Angel Dust blinked his long eyelashes before stifling a bubble of laughter– his partner’s face burning when he realized that yes, his caretaker could in fact hear him. The skin under his icy fur trembled. Angel Dust leaned in to embrace him–

“HUP’TSCCHHHUHH!”

–and pulled back when a strong, throat-shredding sneeze echoed against the walls. Husk's ears pressed flat between a wince of pain, red cheeks somehow turning redder. “Ghhh– ow. S’rry Legs, wassn't s'posed to be that loud– hhhuh!”

Another shaky hitch, and Angel pressed a thin finger just under his nose. “Easy tiger. Don't break all those ribs at once.”

It twitched once. Twice. And finally the cat demon slumped with relief, sinking back into the cushions when the tickle subsided for the moment.

"What--"

"Fell asleep on the couch again. Try not to talk too much, okay?" The other interrupted, feeling the back of his head.

For once, Husk didn't fight it.

A click of the tongue, and thin brows knotted in sympathy. "Shit, that's bad. Maybe I should carry you up--"

"No! Khff Kff--!" Husk shot upright, the shock striking a match, scraping against his throat. Hacking coughs bubbled to the surface, tears lining the edges of his eyes as his lungs nearly rattled. Hunched over, the ringing in his eardrums began to fade– replaced by small, comforting words. Well-manicured fingers moved to his head, gently raking through his fur, and he couldn’t help the delighted shiver that ran down his spine.

"Please, Husky? For me?"

Damnit. 

Slowly but surely he raised his arms, looking everywhere but the ever-widening grin that hovered over him. “I wasn’t lyin’ when I said you make me sappy as fuck. You– snff! You know that, right?”

“It’s a good thing I came along then. I like you better when yer not scowlin’ like a grumpy old man twenty-four seven.” Angel Dust winked.

Something small but ugly twisted in Husk’s chest.

He elected to ignore it, trying to avoid Angel’s doting look as he got on one knee, cradled in a bridal carry as they ascended the staircase. The world blended in colors that seared his eyes and pricked at his skull, and he nuzzled his way into the crook of Angel's neck to shut out the world. Gasping when a tickle surfaced and before he could stop it–

“HP’SHHH! HUP’SCHHHUH! Huhhh..!” Fuck, fuck, fuck that went right down his back! The sickly demon tightened his hold and pinched his nose– to no avail. “HN’CHXT! HUH’CHNXT’hhhuhhh…hhHH-!”

“Hey, hey, don’t hold that shit in. Let it out for me, okay?” Angel Dust cooed, “Y'know how many fluids I've been covered in before? Trust me, this is on the bottom three grossest shit.”

“Hnn…! HUT’SHHH’HUH! HUP’SCHHHH’huh! Hhhhuhhh…hhgh…ugh…sorry.”

“Don’t be.” Husk felt his body laid carefully on the mattress. He only needed to mourn the cold for just a moment before peachy fur and lanky limbs intertwined with his. Two around his waist, two around his chest, two massaging his temples to chase off the pain.

"How long've you been like this? You shoulda called. I coulda ditched work." Angel Dust offered.

At that Husk hummed out a hoarse note, tail flicking restlessly. "'S fine. Had help."

"Good. This whole damn project woulda been for nothin' if ya hadn't been cared for."

"'M supposed to help." He whined. Actually whined. Fuck, this stupid bug was getting to him.

"Yeah? I don't see nothin' like that in yer contract."

Another twist of his insides.

"Well maybe it should be." Husk growled, wings bristling. "For the past two days it's been nothin' but eyes on me. Fuck, Alastor sneaked in when I was asleep!"

"What?" Angel Dust marveled, "And that’s a bad thing? Yer bein' pampered for once in yer life!"

No.

"You deserve the same treatment as everyone else. Y’know that, right?"

Stop!

"Christ Husk, it's like you're allergic to help--"

"Well maybe I'd be worth a damn if everyone focused on their own damn problems and left me alone!"

Angel sat there, wide-eyed as Husk bolted upright.

“Do you know how fuckin’ ridiculous this shit is?! Charlie’s losin’ sleep because the hotel’s– snff! fuckin’ packed with new souls she can’t keep track of! Vaggie’s overworking herself because she feels like she has some goddamn obligation to lay her life on the line! Lucifer’s tryin’ to pretend everything is fine but he’s too fuckin’ stuffed with pride to even begin unpacking the shit he went through before The Fall!”

“Husk–”

“And you! You’re the worst of it! How long’s it been since you’ve been back here? Three days? Do you– sndff! Ugh, fuck– do you know how long I waited at that goddamn bar for you to come back? I waited until I literally got worried sick!” 

The air was so tense it could be cut with a knife. Still, as the heavy panting slowed, the bartender’s heartbeat quickened. Shit. Shit shit shit! Bile rose in his throat. He could feel the rims of his eyes grow wet and fuck, what was he thinking! What the fuck is wrong with him! Goddamnit, he was such a fuckin' mess! He was surrounded by such good people and all he did was hurt them. He denied their help– goddamnit they were just trying to help he doesn't deserve to be here he'sjustlikeVa--

"Husk!" A voice raised, and Husk suddenly gasped out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. He surfaced from a storm he didn't remember drowning in. Slit pupils widened as he was met with someone he still didn't deserve. Smiling fondly like none of that ever happened.

"Breathe." Angel Dust said softly.

"Ange, I-- kff! I-- kfff kFF! I didn't--"

"Shhhh. Breathe." 

Husk opened his mouth to argue. And with a rattling inhale his shoulders untensed. An exhale, and his jaw unclenched. The tears that threatened to spill streamed down his cheeks in rivulets, and he choked back a sob.

"I...h-huh! HUP'SHHH! Snff! I didn't-- hUH–! HUT'SHHH! K'SHOOO! I didn't mean t...to...! HAT'SHHHUH!"

Fucking embarrassing. He startled when something soft pressed against his nose.

"Blow." He shot Angel Dust a glare, but it only came off soft, red-rimmed eyes and wet cheeks that clumped his fur. A disgusting gurgle, and the ailing patient slumped into the sheets, exhausted from every angle.

"Husk, baby, it's okay. Yer sick, you've got a fever, and it's makin' you miserable. Of course yer gonna be grumpy, I’d think you were nuts if you weren’t!"

"Give it a rest. I'm bein' a dick and I hurt you, that's all there is to it." Husk muttered. Blinking in surprise as two palms cradled his cheeks, met face to face with a gaze that pierced right through him. Carefully a third hand reached out, taking his wrist and guiding his paw to a pink-furred stomach.

"Did ya hurt me here?" Anthony asked gently.

"N...no." The demon dared not to move.

Then carefully the other moved up to his neck, completely unflinching. Face pinched in determination. "How 'bout here?"

"No. But-!"

"Here?" The spider demon moved to his cheek, resting it in a heart-shaped paw pad.

"N-no..."

"Here?" His claws met Angel's fluffy hair.

"No."

"How 'bout here?" The porn star moved to his breast, giggling at the unimpressed look that stared back.

"Kid."

The joke was abandoned when Angel Dust inched it gently to the right. A heart beat thumped calmly between his claws.

"And here?" Angel Dust whispered.

Husk swallowed hard, trying not to let fresh tears well up again. His ears wilted, and that’s all the signal needed to be guided into Angel Dust's lap, eyelids drooping heavily. Letting lithe fingers massage his aching muscles.

"D'ya really think I wouldn't say somethin'?" 

"Hm?"

"If I was hurt by you?"

"Mmm...snfff! Y'would."

"Good boy.” Angel Dust hummed, resting his chin on his partner’s head. “You should really get some rest."

"Nah. I've been restin' for two days..." He yawned, fangs poking out. "missed you."

"I ain't goin' nowhere, Babydoll." Angel tipped his chin upwards to give his other half a peck on the forehead, and Husk sleepily rubbed his head just under the chin with a raspy purr. "Sleep. For me?"

Husk sighed. The peace and quiet draped over them like a blanket, warm and comfortable– torn clean in half at a building itch.

“HEP’SHHHH’HUH! ET’CHHHH’HUH! ETCHHH’HOOO! Guhh– HET’SHHHH’HHUH! Ughhh.”

“...After we get ya some meds. Salud.”

[wingedjellyfishflight]

Hogtied: Part 4

You're surprised the next day to see all of the men sitting at breakfast as though nothing is wrong. You sit with them, trying not to make it obvious that you are checking their injuries, only to look directly in Ghost's eyes when you try to casually glance over.

"We're fine, Luv. Be off for a while for recovery, but we are fine." You huff at him. "You know I worry about all of you. Especially with not being able to do the work myself. Bit of a control freak, I suppose."

Soap grins, "never woulda guessed you liked being in charge, hen. Coulda fooled me." You roll your eyes and turn back to your plate, happy they are in good spirits.

You ask them their plans for the day, but they don't have any beyond relaxing in front of the telly. With a nod, you agree with that. "Lunch is on me, then. Already owe the Captain butter chicken, anyway. I will set up an order, just call in what you want and they'll deliver it." Every set of eyes near you is suddenly laser focused. "Umm... I ate his butter chicken, and he caught me with it."

"Lordy, ye dinnae?!" At your nod, the men around you all start talking at once.

"I told him I would replace it, and he let me eat. But good god, you lot need to clean out that fridge more often. I went through so many gross leftovers trying to find something edible." Ghost smirks.

"Who's leftovers were you going to try first?" Your eye twitches as you contemplate if you should lie or start running, and you see his eye zero in on it.

"Nae, ye dinnae! Ye dinnae!"

"Shut up, Soap! It was yours, Ghost. I figured you ordered the best food, so I checked yours first!" With that, you stand up and run from the hall, Ghost leaping up to chase after you. You duck into a closing door just to the right of the dining hall and sprint to the other end, barely making it around the corner before he is onto you. He wraps his arms around your waist and throws you over his shoulder. "The food was bad! I binned it! I didn't even eat your food!"

"You tried to take it, that's guilty enough for me." He carries you to the rec room with the rest of the men are waiting and tosses you gently on a couch. "As punishment for raiding our fridge, you have to sit and watch movies with us."

"Can I at least go get my book?" You knew the answer, and he knew you knew, so he ignored you. "Fine, but I deserve the option to nap if you pick something shite."

"What do you mean by that? We don't pick shite."

"Time Traveler's Wife. We all cried over it, and if I find out who picked it... never getting numbing before stitches again!" Laughter spread around the room at your rant.

"Then what is your favorite one," asked Soap.

"Something with explosions, maybe some angst, oh a holiday movie! Die Hard. Die Hard is good." The whole room groaned. That was always your go-to answer.

"Doc, I know that ain't your favorite. C'mon, I know you hate personal questions, but ya gotta at least tell us your favorite movie on movie day." You shift uncomfortably on the couch and shrink into your, no König's hoodie a bit.

"I... umm... I like Gladiator. It's one of the only ones that I re-watch." The men are quiet at your answer, and Ghost squeezes your shoulder gently.

"Gladiator up first then." You rest your hand on his briefly with a small smile. Ghost and Soap flop down on either side of you, squeezing you between them. The movie starts, and you sit forward on the couch, nervous. Ghost leans forward and tugs you back, pulling you to lean against his side. "You can nap if you want to, but relax. You've been anxious since before we left."

"I could tell this mission was going to be a doozy. I hate being right." You watch the entire movie, relaxing against him with his hand rubbing your back gently.

When it ends, you sit up and stretch, glancing over and seeing Soap sleeping with his head tipped oddly. You stand carefully and readjust him, so he is sitting more comfortably. When you get back from peeing and grabbing a drink, you see that he has taken over most of the couch, leaving no room next to Ghost, who also looks like he is about to nod off.

When you edge back toward the door, Ghost wags his finger at you, so you look for an open seat. Your eyes alight on König, sprawled across a smaller couch by himself.

"Budge up a bit. Soap kicked me out of the cuddle pile." He chuckles and moves his leg to let you sit down.

"We make our own cuddle pile then." He lifts his arm so you can lay against his chest. The next movie is one you haven't seen yet. You only make it about halfway through before falling asleep. The smell of Indian food wakes you up. When you go to sit up, König's arm tightens around you, holding you against him as he sleeps. You debate pushing free, but opt to relax against him, falling back asleep. When you wake next, your body is sore from the shit couch, but you feel cocooned in warmth. Rubbing your face deeper into the warm has it moving away as König gently sits you up. As soon as he lets go, you press against him again.

"So warm... safe..." You feel his body melt against yours.

"Sorry, König. Should've warned ya that she is a level ten clingy cuddler when she falls asleep. Can't pry her off until she's actually awake."

"My back hurts," he says in response. That's all you need to wake up. You sit up, concerned.

"Has it been hurting all day or just since I came over? Can you wiggle your toes? Is there any numbness?" He just stares at your full 180 attitude while Ghost groans.

"The only thing that can get her to stop cuddling: Doctor Mode. Never mention a health issue if you want cuddles, bruv. She can't switch it off hardly at all."

"Do you have-?" König rearranges himself to lay on his back and tug you into his chest.

"Relax, Schatz. I am fine. We will watch more movies together." You relax against him again.

It only lasts a few minutes before you hear thrashing and yelling. You scramble up and see Soap fighting in his sleep. Everyone is standing well back, but Ghost looks torn. You push through the crowd and dodge Ghost's arms to carefully climb in Soap's lap, wrapping your arms around his torso to act as a stabilizer. You try to dodge his wild thrashing, feeling his fist clip your face as you move close to him. You tuck your face into the crook of his neck to keep him from hitting you again and begin singing quietly to him.

"Can ye no hush your weepin'

All the wee lambs are sleepin'

Birdies are nestlin' nestlin' together

Dream Angus is hirplin' oer the heather

Dreams to sell, fine dreams to sell

Angus is here wi' dreams to sell

Hush ye my baby and sleep without fear

Dream Angus has brought you a dream my dear.

List' to the curlew cryin'

Faintly the echos dyin'

Even the birdies and the beasties are sleepin'

But my bonny bairn is weepin' weepin'"

Slowly, Soap calms, and you are able to relax your hold. He cries silently into your shoulder as you sing the lullaby through a second time. You pull back and rest a hand on his cheek. "Are ye alright noo, laddie?" He nods, laying his hand over yours. "Good, because I need to make sure you didn't tear anything up."

He growls and doesn't let loose your hand, staring at your face. "First ye'll tell me where ye git yon blue keeker."

"Ghost skelped me. Said I was too mouthy during the film." You pull your hand back with a grin and scoot back in his lap to tug up his shirt, checking that he hasn't popped any stitches.

"Dinnae be telling me havers."

"Ah wud never tell ye havers. Ahm a saint of a Catholic." Laughter bursts around the room, many knowing you were not Catholic at all and having heard many lies come from you to protect them or convince them to do something they hate.

"Ye dinnae have it when scran was here. Ye were sleepin on yon big yin." You shrug and glance over at the food.

"Well, ye look bonnie." You stand with Ghost's help, the grumble of your tummy making him chuckle.

"Go eat, luv. We got him from here."

"Ghost, did you hit the wee doctor? I ken ye dinnae, but-"

"English, Bubbles. And if she said I did, then I must have. The doctor is a saint of a Catholic, after all." Soap sputters, unable to form any words.

Walking over to the table, you spot your food, König's and... the Captain's. He didn't come get it. You huff and carry it to his office, knocking firmly.

"Enter," Captain Price's voice floats through the door. Opening it, you see he is in a meeting with another man.

"Sir, you didn't grab your lunch, so I figured I would deliver it." He nods his thanks and gestures for you to bring it to him.

"Since when are delivery drivers allowed to bring food directly to you? And when did they start dressing so terribly?" You glance down at the hoodie draped over you and open your mouth to respond. Captain's voice cuts you off.

"Sir, this is the doctor I was speaking about. It is merely her day off." He somehow balances censure of the other man with respect in a way that has you in awe of his skill.

"Hmph. In my day, women were expected to dress up for the men around them, on duty or off." You bristle, and Captain tries to intervene again.

"We do not police what the men wear on their days off. We certainly won't with the women we work alongside. Now-"

"I'm just saying female doctors need to have a little self-respect and demand enough respect to be obeyed by the men." Price could not be fast enough to silence your barked laughter.

"Sir, with all due respect, the men don't care at all what I am wearing as long as I am fixing their injuries. This hoodie you are so dismissive of is but a sign of the respect of the men. I wonder, how would you convince a heavily muscled, 16 stone man to submit to having the mask removed that he considers part and parcel to who he is? One that less than a dozen living men have seen under since he first donned it."

He snorts and says, "Enough orderlies will force any man to submit to anything."

"And thusly you have destroyed any and all trust that man has in you or the medical profession. I have convinced that man, peacefully, to remove his mask. Built up trust over time to convince him and many others to give a full and unabridged medical history by allowing them the right to privacy. Hell, I have convinced a prisoner that came here hogtied due to how dangerous he was to not only allow me to treat him without needing restraints but to allow the removal of his mask. That man has become one of our greatest assets, in part, due to the respect afforded to him, which started in the medical bay. So, to hear you say that brute force and dressing pretty are the only two ways to gain respect around here is not just inappropriate but sets a dangerous precedent for the men we serve. Such a precedent, I will not allow to take root in my clinic." Silence fills the room after you finish speaking. The man turns to Price.

"I'm convinced. Promotion approved." He signs a piece of paper on the desk. Captain grins at your stunned and confused face.

"Agreed. That was quite a moving statement, Major. Soon to be Lieutenant Colonel, I suppose." Your eyes narrow in suspicion as you look back and forth between them.

"Sir, am I to be expected to leave and work in a different facility, then? If so, I do not want this promotion."

"You'll have to go where assigned, doc. That's above my paygrade to influence."

"Yes, and your opinion on a promotion doesn't matter. If you are promoted, you will work where assigned until the end of your contract."

"I won't leave my men. It would take many steps back. It was jokingly mentioned not long ago, and they nearly mutinied."

"They will get over it." The man seems smug, and it is ticking you off something fierce.

"That's fine then, Captain. I am sure my parents will be thrilled to hear that I no longer wish to work for the military."

He winces, "Now, doll. There's no reason to go involving your parents. I'm sure we can work something out."

"Parents? The military does not care bout the opinions of parents." He scoffs at your threat.

"They do when they have money and political favors. Captain, I will do everything in my power to stay, including sabotaging a promotion. If you force my hand, I will find a way out rather than have to start over somewhere else. Please, do not push me on this, I love working here."

You are begging at this point. Leaving your men would be devastating. You've tried to stay under the radar ever since finding out that promotions mean leaving, even to the point of refusing to record the advanced training and techniques you have taken and the ones you have pioneered.

"I understand, Major. We will discuss this further later." You know a dismissal when you hear it.

"Yes, sir."

The next thing you know, you are back in the rec room, sitting in front of your food. Ghost appears at your side and nudges you gently.

"What happened, Luv?"

"I got promoted, I think. Maybe."

"Woo-"

"Shut up. It isn't a good thing."

"Why not? You are moving from Major to Lieutenant Corporal! That is great! They've been ignoring you for too long." He starts to stand, and you drag him back down.

"If I get promoted, I have to leave. I-i won't be here anymore. That's why I've been hiding from it."

"Oh," he says as he settles back in. "You've been avoiding more money and shit to stay with us? But why?" You nod and shove a piece of food in your mouth, trying to get a bit of time to think.

"I just... I really love working with you guys. It's exactly the job I wanted since I had to be a doctor. Working with adrenaline junkies who save the world, ya know?" You sigh and lean against his shoulder. "I really like the relationships I've built here. You guys are respectful and kind. Female officers don't usually much respect."

He rubs your arm gently. "Heard and understood, luv. We will figure this out together, then. Eat up, and we can watch another movie before dinner."

You wake up later sandwiched between Ghost and Soap on the couch, each wrapped around you somehow. Your last thought before falling asleep again is the way this feels like home.

The next week, Captain Price sets a meeting with you. When you tell Ghost, he immediately wants to go with you. Despite turning him down every time and refusing to tell him when, he catches the closing door and silently stands behind your chair. The Captain stares at him for a long moment before opting to ignore him completely.

"I've arranged this meeting to discuss your upcoming promotion and what it means for you and the men."

"I understand, sir. I can have the files updated and ready for transfer in about two weeks. I will need to meet one on one with each man to ensure the transferred files meet with his approval based on the policy in effect." Captain Price looks surprised.

"You don't intend to pass on the full histories to a replacement?"

"No, I am afraid they will be accidentally dropped into a paper shredder, and there will be an incident with a small bin fire just off base. Quite unfortunate, but not preventable." You keep your gaze passive and meet the Captain's own look evenly. "I will ensure that the approved files do not meet with such an end. I will also endeavor to provide a full list of the procedures and techniques that we have pioneered under my command so that there is consistency for the men. They do so hate change."

"I hope the former will not be necessary, and I implore you to implement the latter. As an aside, in speaking further with the RAMC, we have come to an agreement for you to stay here at this post indefinitely. It was deemed necessary to current and future missions to maintain consistency in medical care. I was asked to pass on a message: All doctors are required to record their advanced training and education, and thus, it is expected that you will update your records accordingly. I believe that covers everything." His grave face suddenly breaks into a smirk, just as you begin crying with joy.

"Thank you, Captain! Thank you!" He stands and moves around his desk to wrap you in a hug.

"You did good, doll. I am so proud of the work you have done, and now it will be recognized by everyone else." He smiles down at you and presses a kiss to your forehead. "Now, please do those updates. I called in some big favors and made some promises to work this out." All you can do is nod before you are pulled from the Captain and crushed against Ghost's chest.

"Woohoo! You're staying with us, luv!" He drags you to the door with a bare minimum of respect for Captain Price, refusing to let you stop and say goodbye. "Time to go tell everyone. We will have a party!"

"I've never seen you so excited for anything, Ghost. Slow down, I'm gonna trip!" He huffs playfully but slows down.

"I wanted to get you out of there before the Captain decided he needed to address what you so casually stated, but it is exciting to keep you on. I have been trying to decide how to break into your office for those files for the last week." You stop and frown.

"Don't do that. It would be dangerous to try to steal them." He cocks an eyebrow. "Yes, dangerous. You seriously don't think all I have protecting them are a few flimsy filing cabinet locks after how long it took to get that information. There is life and death information in them. I called in a few favors to build a security system of sorts for it."

"That's... that's sexy as hell, luv. You are one loyal woman." He stares down at you for several long moments, starting when someone clears a throat a little ways away.

"Sorry to break up the party. I heard you had your meeting today. How did it go?" König asks innocently, making you glare at Ghost.

"You weren't supposed to tell anyone!" He holds his hands up in surrender, backing away.

"I was pretty sure you weren't leaving, promotion or not. We just want to celebrate with you."

"Ghost! Lech mich am Arsch! Bastardo! Schluckspecht!"

"Come, mein Schatz. It is good that we celebrate now. You are staying, and we do not have to stage a rebellion." König picks you up as though you are just a child, carrying you away from a laughing Ghost even as you yell more insults. You want to fight away from him, but you can't stop from pressing closer. You can barely stop yourself from nuzzling against his shoulder. It takes a minute then for you to realize that he has turned away from the rec room, which is where you're sure the party is supposed to be.

"König, where are you taking me?" You catch your traitorous fingers rubbing at the back of his neck under the mask. "Sorry."

"I like your hands on me, meine Prinzessin. I wanted to talk to you without prying eyes and ears..." You rub your fingers against his collarbone through his shirt. "Yes, I like that." You blush and lean forward, stopping just in front of his lips. He cups the back of your head, closing the distance and kissing you through his mask.

You feel your back pressed against a wall and hear the jingle of keys. König has brought you to his quarters. He carries you in, kicking the door shut and locking it. Laying you on the bed, he says, "Tell me what you want, Schatz. I need to know."

"I want this, König. I want you. Bitte." He quickly strips off his clothes and mask, giving you space to do the same.

"Gut. I will fuck you, then I will take you to the party as meine Prinzessin... if you can walk." He chuckles as he climbs on the bed, pushing your legs up and laying his cock against your stomach. "It will be a tight fit. Might take all night to loosen up you up." He is excited, talking fast and teasing you with his fingers already.

"Promise?" Your question is loaded, but he nods happily.

"Yes, Prinzessin. You will take the whole thing before the night is over. I will make sure of it." He leans down close to your ear, "I will make you mine forever."

[star--nymph]

@saltyowlets: Pistol whip i need to know

Pistol Whip isn't a DA fic, actually! It's a long fic I started writing for My Time At Sandrock about my Builder, Roxie. She's a former showgirl who lives her home town for uuuuuhh mysterious reasons that isn't related to her workshop burning down at all and ends up in Sandrock.

The prologue dealt with the death of her mentor and how she was processing that (not well). Roxie is a play on tough-as-nails 40s actresses, though she tends to come off way harsher in my writing (but I like writing harsh women with emotional issues, as we know).

After she closed her umbrella and put it off to the side, Roxie unscrewed the flask and leaned her back against the tombstone, stretching her legs out across the plot. Someone would walked by and call it disrespectful, resting on a new tombstone of a freshly buried man but Aero wouldn’t’ve cared. She cut it, engraved it, polished it; her right to plant her ass on it and drink her self half to death. She swirled the flask before she took a long drink; sweet spice flooded her tongue and smoothed down her throat like burning honey. Was never a whiskey girl, her flavor was a gin or a something that kicked hard with a rim of salt, but she could never deny Aero knew how to pick his drinks.  “Woulda been better with ice.” She muttered and used the pointed tip of her shoe to draw circles on his muddy graves. She paused, waiting for a side retort she knew would never come, her only companions the distant sounds of the city over the cemetery walls and the hush of wind through damp grass.  “This sucks.” The way she spoke the final word was gut deep and thick as the mud caking her heels. She felt her lip wobble and her breath begin to quickening, but no, no should start blabbering here and now. Those tears could go right back into her eyes where they belong. So, she heaved a side that shuddered all the way to her soul and swallowed the sobs tangled in the cobwebs of her chest.  She wasn’t gonna be some wailing board beating the dirt like it was gonna do something. “You could have told me you were planning to go, ya know. Give me time to prepare.” Now a crazy broad talking to an old bastard’s grave? That, her pride can swing. Roxie took another swig and held it in her mouth, contemplating her next words to nothing and no one. She swallowed and licked her lips, then—”At least if you did, I coulda…I dunno…done something. Instead I find you all on your lonesome for who knows how long.” Her voice broke again; she coughed to cover it up and shook her head to free herself of the muddle thoughts.  She hated this. Hated the feeling of wet and cold, both inside and out. She peered down at her gloved hands and remembered the way Aero’s hand had felt when she found him; when she tried to tug him by the hand to wake him up for breakfast and just knew by the touch he was gone. The way his arm weighed in her hand, stiff and pale, with the the same density as a waxed candle.  And cold. He was so cold. There ain’t any kind of cold like that, where you knew he was just bloodless. There was no life pumping in those veins.  What she shook and shrieked at that day wasn’t a man, it was just a piece of meat.  Now she was staring at the same hands that held him and could feel that same bloodless cold inside her. Nothing could fix it, the booze still on her lips could only numb it. Throw her into a fire; she wouldn’t even feel it. Is this going to be her life forever now? Wallowing in pity and grief like some pathetic lost girl someone needed to pick up and coddle? Seeing her mentor in everything he owned, everything he touched, in old men on the street, in the way the light caught whiskey at the bottom of a bottle? Oh, she hated this. Almost hated him. Roxie couldn’t do this forever. 

[pwnyta]

Its impressive... Horikoshi really made little miss Deus Ex Machina even LESS narratively satisfying then I could have ever imagined. Both with Mirio AND now Deku....

TBF Its on me thinking it was kinda interesting that Deku lost his arms in Shiga-world and that for some reason translating to it happening outside too, I was curious how the fuck that happened but luckily we didnt have to dwell on that because Eri comes in and rips her horn off for some reason...

Wasnt the Quirk destroying bullets made from her blood... It says on the wiki it was her 'biological material' so maybe I assumed it was her blood... but like?? Why she have to rip her horn off? Aizawa (great to see you again btw im sorry Hori didnt think spending some more time with you would be beneficial for some reason but GREAT TO SEE YA BUD) BUT WTF DID YOU TELL ERI TO MAKE HER RIP HER HORN OFF!? Also lmao Ectoplam being put on babysitting duty is fucking NUTS. What do YOU MEAN?! Also he helped a little girl chop her horn off.... work. IDK if he was the best choice for this for various reasons....

ANYWAYS... Eri being like 'My horn is part of me and since you told me how my Quirk works... this should help' So like... you have hair ya know... A lot of it. You probably coulda/shoulda started with that... especially since it woulda been like... a callback to Deku eating All Mights hair to start the series off ya know?

BUT WHATEVER

CUZ IT WOULDA RUINED THE TENSION AIZAWA-SAN PLEASE.

For at least All Might... but Bakugo was dead for like a straight up year IRL... and honestly I would have accepted Eris quirk more than the actual hilarious nonsensical bullshit that happened. Which to remind everyone...

[An origami ninja folded himself up so small and wrapped/sewed himself around Bakugos ripped apart heart while a man who creates denim threads sewed it back together... neither of these men are surgeons but its fine because all that didnt save Bakugo he actually used his explosive Quirk to restart his OWN heart somehow...

Am I getting all that right? Its been a hot minute.

A hot ridiculous minute....]

All Might coulda been interesting though. And Hori somehow rarely disappoints when All Might is involved (accept AFO randomly having a quirk that completely undoes Stains Quirks ability. That was bullshit. He had a Quirk for that but not one for the rewind? OK... W/E. AFO is so disappointing.)

Hori letting Bakugo be dead for an IRL year completely killing the tension of the scene then reviving him in the most bull-shittest way I never could have imagined 🤝 Deku losing his arms in a somewhat interesting way only to get them back like a chapter later via some bullshit way via Eris horn I never could have imagined.

Also I didnt say it before but Ojiro, Sato, and Sero being shoved into this is so fucking funny. Hori really said 'Oh shit I forgot about these three... gotta pretend theyre useful somehow'

Love that.

Love my boys. Good for them LMAO.

[ask-chef-teruteru]

Aaah I've been gone for a while and I was waiting for a perfect time to tell you but there's never a perfect time is there so might as well just say it now or I never will; I got another boyfriend!! I wanted to tell you about him as soon as you got back but I felt like it should wait and then I just kept putting it off fdkfdjgdfkgh

His name is Zayne and he's suuuuuper pretty and nice and sooooo cool!! I'd love to bring him by the diner to meet you sometime soon but he's super busy and lives pretty far so I don't know when that'll happen but

I just wanted to tell you!!! I love him very much!!! And I love you very much!!!!

“Fine fella like yourself, I’m surprised ya weren’t a regular Casanova by the time y’all moseyed along to the diner, swept me off my feet! Then again, bless your lil’ heart, you’re so shy. Even in tellin’ me ‘bout your great news! And it is great news, sugar! I’m happy as can be for y’all!”

“It’s wonderful to see y’all ‘round here again! World’s always a bit brighter with you in it, so I hope y’all been doin’ well! I appreciate y’all stoppin’ on by to keep me up to date on your date— you silly lil’ thing! Y’all coulda told me ‘bout him any ol’ time! Any time is the right time to talk about the people you love! I coulda no sooner stepped foot in the diner ‘fore you ran at me sayin’ 'Teruteru, you look at this boy I done landed, ain’t I so lucky!?' and I woulda been excited for ya then and there!

I am thrilled to bits for y’all, my darlin’! I’m hopin’ I get the chance to meet him too, but I understand how bein’ busy goes.

Congratulations on the happy relationship! Zayne ain’t the only one who’s pretty n’ nice n’ cool, n’ I’m glad y’all found each other!

I love y’all too, o’ course! Don’t go bein’ a stranger waitin’ on the perfect time to talk to me again a’ight? You n’ yours are always welcome!”

[totentnz]

a little something for the AU @bishicat and me have been fucking around with. essentially everything is the same but my v (viper) gets to be unhinged and without a brainworm, making viv's life just a bit more chaotic lmao enjoy!

"i'm not a chair jockey, viv." viper was clearly annoyed at the request for help with this gig. "coulda told me before what you were up to, woulda joined ya." there was a pop up in viv's user interface; access requested. johnny popped into her vision now. "don't."

it had only been a few days since v crawled from the wreck that was the arasaka tower gig and he had watched her stumble and fuck up for long enough. when he said he didnt want her dead anymore, he was telling the truth: he needed her to fix his past mistakes and she wouldnt be able to do any of it with the way things were going right now. she lost all her implants and was now living the life she had given so much to avoid. it was a fucked up stitch and he felt for her, perhaps he even appreciated her unwillingness to lie down with the fallen. they had to get through this together and two heads were better than one, especially if one was filled with hot air and pipe dreams, johnny thought.

he was sitting on a barrel next to her. though she didn't reply to him and her hesitation meant she was willing to hear him out. "don't trust the chick." he lit one of his cigarettes and took a drag. "sides, shouldn't allow any runner into ya system." he watched her, tried to grasp what was going on in her thoughts, was curious to see if she would give his words the time of day, see if she would even consider if what he was saying was true. "she's not any runner though. i trust her." the engram rolled his eyes and adjusted his position to face v. "clearly ya do but that don't mean you should." johnny was getting agitated now, how could she be so blind? within a year she was betrayed twice: first by saka, then by dex and yet she would still a person so blindly; a person going by viper of all things.

"what the fuck are you talking about? you --" their conversation was interrupted by the voice on the holo. "viv? c'mon you said this was time sensitive." this interruption pissed him off even more. she was so full of herself, thought her time was so precious, on her netrunner high horse. "sorry, giving you acess now." viv finally said and johnny would've held his breath if he had any. this could be the end, he was given a second chance at life and it would all end so quickly just because he had to wake up in a gullible gonk's skull. however, nothing did happen, yet.

"a'ight. look up for me, find a camera." viper instructed, the tone in her voice was a bit too playful however. "why are all netrunners fuckin weirdos, control freaks?" he wondered. johnny wasnt surprised when viv looked around like she was told to; what a great employee, following orders without questions.

soon multiple icons depicting a snake bearing it's fangs popped up all around her vision, meaning viper was hacking away already. it was all so fast these days, she didnt even need to be present, didnt need to be physically jacked into any port to fuck with the system. it freaked him out though v being completely unphased by it was somehow worse.

"your funeral." johnny jumped down from the barrel he sat on just to appear on one of the catwalks in the factory a few feet in the air. "you've seen my memories, you know her as well as i do! you know she can be trusted!" viv argued. "yeah, that's what worries me. how long's it been since the two of ya last spoke? 4 years? more? an' she hasnt changed a bit? 's just ready to help ya? pick up exactly where ya left off? after you abandoned her for a corp? doesnt seem likely to me." he paraded, walking up and down the metal walkway, erratically taking a drag from his cigarette after each question. "it's called friendship, johnny, know ya dont trust nobody. doesnt mean i have to." viv ducked behind one of the barrels to hide from the patrol that was making their way back into the hangar and johnny threw the cigarette bud down at them.

"place should be your playground now. doors unlocked, cameras on loop, turrets shut down." there it was again, that chick really thought she was the best runner there is, ridiculous. he was itching to give her a piece of his mind, another downside of not having vocal chords of his own.

"thanks val, owe ya one." viv replied with a smile and johnny stretched out his arms, letting himself fall off the catwalk. "on my way over there now. how're ya doin this?"

johnny appeared right in front of v now, if he had a smell she would be able to make out the cigarettes and tequila from nights past. "ya think saka just let you go? ya think they didnt send someone? after ya stole from them?" it was clear to him: arasaka would never let him go and this was the oldest trick in the book. step one: find someone from your past. step two: replace them or start to control them. step three: you are now under constant surveillance and soon they will control you too. his mind was racing now and he once again wondered how she was unable to see it.

"oh, for fuck's-- think she's a sleeper cell? sent to take me out, soon as i spill some corp secrets?" v's dismissive tone only strenghthened his belief that their friendship was an elaborate con to get to him. it had to be. "clearly your gonk ass still doesnt know what saka is capable of."

"bitch! quit talkin' to ya fuckin' hallucination!" viper yelled from the holo. v just had to tell her so called friend about their sitch huh? and viper was all too eager to believe it. sure it was true but who would believe any of this? someone who is supposed to believe it, gain her trust, clearly.

"plan 's to do this silent." v used to be good at it, doing things quietly, but now without her implants and no eddies to buy new ones things had proven to be more difficult, much to both of their frustration. only reason she called up viper for help was due to her not being able to efficently hack her way into this.

"gotcha, will stay on the call, keep me updated, yeah?" something would go south, it was just their shit luck and even if it didn't happen naturally, the runner had everything she needed to put v into an even bigger debt. "i smell a rat v." johnny said, finally disappearing for good.

[obigem]

It was getting late in the day and the campers were given free time to get dressed and prepared for the campfire dance. With plenty of time to primp, Jordie decided to use the extra time to dish with a new friend she'd made.

"And then she called me stupid and said she didn't wanna be friends anymore. Can you believe that, Helena? I mean, maybe some of it was kind of my fault. I coulda stopped her from confessing, but she was so determined. And maybe the Zella part was kinda mean."

"Jordie, it was a lot mean!"

"OK, so it was a lot mean! But she was stealing my best friend. They were doing everything together and leaving me out. How was that fair?"

"You should tell Cordelia this. You can't get jealous and then be mean, Jordie."

"I didn't mean to be mean, I just started saying stuff to get my way, and I couldn't stop myself." Jordie pouted.

"Ya know, I bet if you had asked to hang out with them, all three of you could've did things together. Zella's actually really nice. We had breakfast together."

"But I'm not good at that stuff they were doing together. Bugs and frogs? I can't!"

"I bet if you asked they woulda did stuff you like too. But first you gotta apologize, Jordie. To both of them. Otherwise all they'll remember you for is being mean."

"I know." Jordie sighed.

"Ya know, Helena, you're actually really cool. Thanks for listening to me."

"No problem! You're pretty cool, too, Jordie."

"Hey, have you ever thought about taking off your glasses? I bet you'd be so pretty without them."

"But I can't see without my glasses!"

"Oh right, but contacts exist, right? You should totally ask your mom to get you some."

"I dunno."

"Don't worry, I can teach you my technique on how to cry on demand to get whatever you want."

It was the start of a beautiful Jordie style friendship 💁🏿‍♀️

[noblechaton]

windamp

oh yeah i dont miss them haha. p3 is so interesting because it was the first to add social sim stuff. they've learned a lot over the years. if you were to play every game back to back it would be interesting to see all the small changes (though also a little crazy lmao). i do wonder if adding all the link episodes at night wouldve helped any with the night emptiness. or adding the guy's actual social links. they added a bunch of stat builders in reload but once thats done there's not anything new beyond a few of the computer programs and hangouts (which also have limits). actually, in p4g you can run into non party social links at night. i think that might've helped...you can w/ koro ofc but i think some w/o him wouldve been cool. i think the cats and clocks were added to try to entice people to come in more often, but tbh....it doesnt work very well lmao. i think i just kept going in the last possible day. maybe some date specific events where interesting things happen wouldve worked better?

honestly that's something I've really enjoyed about the experience so far in that I can see where a lot of the stuff that hooked me in P5R really started at - it's like seeing the skeleton in a way, which isn't to say things are bare bones or anything, I honestly kinda like how simple it is in comparison in some ways, but it's neat seeing how things started out, basically, and being able to point at things that improve in mechanical depth and such as things go on - tho it does feel weird saying this about a game that technically comes after their most recent sequel lmao

that said I do agree in that I think it'd been neat to have something like that "meeting links at night" thing going - obviously I don't fault em fer not having such a thing at this stage, as said yesterday it's kinda unfair to say this game that technically came first should have the improvements made across the sequels - but I think adding in more night stuff woulda gone a long way without really messin' with the core experience much; the Koro walks are really fun and genuinely something of a highlight for me, as they offer insight on the characters current states throughout the game (the ones after October 4th in particular were really strong imo) and more of that is never gonna be a bad thing

on that note, I also like just how much more personal the cast feels in main narrative cutscenes and such; P5R's cast felt this way too, but ya kinda had to do the confidants to really get to know em, whereas here I feel I know them really well despite the lack of social links, and when there are some they feel like expansions of the characters rather than like, the only way to know em (not that I feel this was true of P5R mind you; just that you miss out on a lotta the good stuff without doing their links, while, in lieu of them in P3/R, you get the full monty outright)

ultimately I think it kinda comes down to whether or not they should have done a proper remake or leaned more into the remaster thing - I feel what I'm playing is a very strong, very fun experience on its own, but there's definitely things I feel they coulda improved if they'd leaned more in either direction. that said I don't think I'd want a full blown remake of this narrative as I've found it really engaging and interesting in ways that are near total contrast to P5R, which is real fun for me

[caveofwanderers]

"How long had it been...."

Arc was traveling through the wilds of Lastation for a quest, partly to stave boredom. But there was something else that had his attention, someone who had been roaming across the land... A girl dressed in gold with bright hair.

"(I didn't think I'd run into an unwritten possibility's player... But if she's the real deal or not remains to be seen.)" hearing noises of battle, he'd prepare a short sword, with a crystalline red sheen.

"C'MON! I'LL TAKE YOU ALL DOWN--!" The source of the noise would be made known as it seemed someone was throwing down with one of the wild monsters in the area, but it seemed this person was on the ropes before her current opponent was slashed in twain by Arc's blade.

"Heh, looks like I made it just in time..." there's a brief moment of desummoning the blade, before he'd turn to face the other.

OST: Comedy

"WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?! If one of those things got you killed you woulda been carted off to the ferryman!"

"Pssh, I had it cover--"

"Don't give me that crap! There was a slim chance you coulda died if I didn't make it in time! Don't you have SOME self-preservation?!"

OST: nocturne

"...Sorry, I... I just didn't want you to lose your 'possibility'."

"...Possibility? You know about the Continuum Shift from my world?"

"Not 'your' world particularly... But your possibility, unwritten in the logbook of phenomena, is still a possibility worth protecting."

"Heh... I don't understand what ya mean, but... Thanks for the save. I hafta keep going. I'm nearing my next destination."

"Not in the shape you're in right now. We're headed back to my place in Lastation. Some healing magic should do ya nice."

"I suppose.... You got a name, pal?"

"...It's Arc. Now come along."

[espytalks]

Im ready to talk about what happened on sunday. Long post under cut, and to save time, its mostly copy pasted from a convo with a friend, so the tone is a lot more upset than i am now. i added extra thoughts in italics, and fixed typos.

Tldr, i fell into a boat, sustaining minor (but worrying) injuries, and had a big argument with my brother. Everything's fine now.

My brother has a boat, we know friends of the family who has access to a river we can boat on. Hes my brother, i like spending time with him, and he enjoys fishing. Hes super excited about this boat, man. He doesn't have anyone else to hang out with but me, so regardless im kinda pressured to go with him. I want him to be happy, ya know?

And today, we went out, second time ive ever been in a boat, and the truck gets stuck getting the boat in. Not a big deal, we can call my dad later. I have a hard time getting in, but i get in and we have a fun time.

I have severe psoriasis, and the patches on my arms started getting sunburned, so i say we should head back.

Tides low. Man.

He wanted me to get out of the boat. Im fat, man, im short, im not strong. He kept saying i can do it, that i can get out of the boat myself, and that there wasn't any other way, but when i tried, i fell back into the boat, scratching my back and leg enough to draw blood. I landed on my brother, i feel guilty about that cause we were both pinned and i hurt him because of the fall. I barely manage to roll around and get up.

Editing me coming in: i only had his foot pinned. He made it clear when we talked about it that night i didn't hurt him. He was tense at that moment cause we almost capsized, and he was focused on holding the paddle in the water to keep the boat in place, and because of me he couldn't move.

We loose the paddles we needed to push the boat to shore, he uses a fishing rod to reel us towards the paddle, we make it back to a place we could get out, but he still insists i get out first.

I cant, man. Im tired, im still not strong enough, and im scared now, and pissed, and sad, cause falling is one of my biggest fears and it already happened once.

We were actually close to the ramp with the trailer for the boat, so since i couldn't climp up and balance to get on land the hard way, i decided to wade through near waist high water to get to the slope, cause it was easier for me to get out.

Hes pissed. I learned later he heard a gater was in the area, he didn't tell me this info before i jumped in, cause he didn't want me to panic (it would have liked to know that, bro)

Editing again: unrelated but apparently discord has a word limit. Ive never reached it before this point.

I get out, im tired, were both pissed at each other. He wont let me get in the truck to sit down ( i decided to respect this, actually. I coulda said screw you and got in anyways, but i know that woulda been too far)

I sit on the bench, he calls dad to come get me (dad later called me, i gave him more info, and told him the truck was stuck and we needed help) im cold, wet, lost one of my crocs (i have both back, they're fine. Crocs can float, apparently)

We wait for about half an hour or so getting eat up by bugs in the sun and Florida heat.

Dad comes, i get in his truck, dad pulls the truck (and boat, by this point my brother got the boat onto the trailer) out of the water. My brother hands me my stuff, and dad and i leave.

I feel guilty leaving my brother to himself to wrap all that up, but he wasn't too far behind us, i guess, cause he was home by the time i had finished a shower.

Edit: he told me later he needed the time alone, and i shouldn't feel bad.

I washed the scratches as best i could, and put antiseptic on them, but im still worried about whether its gonna be ok. I don't have insurance, actually, and us healthcare is notoriously expensive, so if i get sick from this, i might be screwed. Dad seems to think its fine, i wanna trust him, but i was sitting in wet pants filled with who knows what kinda river germs for almost an hour so. Ya know.

Edit: im probably fine. Nothing looks infected, its been a couple days and i feel alright, and im being careful to make sure i know if anything develops. I have anxiety, so im always gonna worry about it, but i think ill be fine. Also, my favorite pair of pants is kinda ruined. Bummer.

Its been hours since we've all been home, we've ate dinner, ive calmed down, aside from worries about my health, and i know my brothers tired and still a bit upset about it. I think hes calmed down enough that it'll be ok, but im still anxious to really address it. He doesn't like talking about arguments and stuff after they happen, so its hard for me to get closure from events, and it leaves me feeling guilty for a long time. I have issues letting go.

Im tired, im anxious, im sad, im worried about my brother, and i think i don't ever wanna get on a boat again, but im gonna have to, i just know it, if i want him to be happy.

At this point i had a message from my brother, asking me to get him something. Didn't make a bit deal about it, (didn't even mention to my friend what the message was about) but man, im actually a bit miffed, even now. Like,??? He knew what i went through, i was tired sore, and hashtag done?? We talked about everything later, and we're ok now, i vented and we're putting this behind us, but man, he can be annoying. My friend said some reassuring stuff, mentioned it sounded like my brother was pretty rude, and i added this next part on.

Ya know, the worst part?

My brother mainly kept insisting i get out cause he thought i was only holding back because of fear. I kept telling him i couldn't, i physically cant, cause im weak and i have bad balance. He kept giving me the "believe in yourself, you can do it" advice. He didn't believe me when i said it wasn't psychological.

He was rude, but its cause he really loves me, ya know? He cares about me a lot, and he had a lot of faith in me. He's there for me when it counts. He's also just. A bit bossy, and doesn't explain things well, and he thinks he knows best all the time, and gets mad when people don't listen to him.

Im not much better, im kinda a bit of a bitch when im angry, too, but he was clearly a lot more stressed than i was, but he absolutely thought i was panicking when i wasn't.

My brother can be a bit hard to reason with, especially in stressful moments. He kinda gets locked in a mindset, and its usually easier to just let him go through his own motions and let him make mistakes. It usually means i get bossed around. Ive been trying to make it clear to everyone i don't like being treated like a child, but its still something i keep experiencing. When it bothers me a lot, i go and talk about it when everything settles.

He tries to be respectful of me and listen, which is why i tolerate it. We have a good relationship, i swear, its just. Difficult. When hes good, hes great, hes a good person, but hes also got some genuine problems, and so do i, and we need to communicate.

I was really rattled yesterday, basic stuff was thrown off, and i had minor difficulty focusing, and i was really sore. I found a bruise i didn't know i had, and i don't bruise easily. Ive been keeping the antiseptic on everything that needs it, and they're healing well.

He says it'll be a while before we go in that boat again. He does still want to go fishing, but hes gonna take me to various ponds and stuff instead. I just wanna go to the beach. He joked about how we can fish on the beach too. He laughed at the dirty look i gave him. I know hes not that serious.

Also, we saw manatees! I have some video, but it doesn't show em well. Its sad how that was by far not the highlight of the day.

[cxnscience]

"I was already safe - everybody was already safe, or... safe enough, I mean, I don't - everybody always came back alright," he argues, even though it's not the exact truth. The full truth is that people do keep getting hurt, and pulling through gets more and more challenging. That was why he'd given him the dust in the first place. Just in case. He expected it to all be used up at once, the way a wish might be, in case there was something they couldn't fix themselves.

Maybe he should have known that Doc was too smart for that, and far too cautious. Jiminy's no good at long-term solutions. Jiminy would blow it all at once if it meant he could spare anyone a small amount of pain. Of course the doctor would think of a better use. He should be proud, but conjuring up the feeling is impossible.

"I'm still here, Doc, and even the princess keeps findin' her way back. Sometimes without the Lady. Every ounce of bad magic we ran into, there was good magic, too. We woulda kept findin' some way to fix things. Or I - there had to be other ways to figure out how to use the dust. I coulda just asked 'em." The Lady, or the other fairies, if she was for some reason opposed to him offering it up. He doubts she would have been - still, though. There were options. Maybe Jiminy should have thought this through more fully in advance. Maybe it's on his shoulders. "I thought you were already protectin' folks. We were protecting each other. It's not gonna be any better and it's not gonna be normal, not without you."

Perhaps Jiminy is narrow-minded, thinking it wasn't worth the long-term benefits, no matter how good they may seem. If he stops to think about it, truly and objectively, Doc is right. It's costly but it will ultimately protect people. Help cure things without any cure. Jiminy probably would have made the same exact sacrifice if he'd been given that chance. But it still stings of unfairness, the thought of Doc having no control over so much of his life and then being forced to die when he finally figures out how to make good with it regardless. It's not a choice Jiminy would have let him walk into, if he'd had a say. He would've fought it for a better sort of normality. Yes, he is angry about that.

"...Did you know? That it'd kill ya? Have any sorta inkling you were gonna die if you used it like that?"

He deserves that. "If it fixes 'em, means I can always keep y'safe. Ev'n if I gotta keep that promise I nev'r meant to keep." There's a long exhale. But he deserves it. He had gotten used to the idea of being left behind. It wasn't so bad. You can't replace those you lose and you carry them forever... but never having met them is the worst fate. "We ain't alway able to keep goin' to the Lady. Don't want her star stallin', erm, fallin' on account o' us." He's been selfish. He's wished for so much. He's wanted so much. She's been kind but it's because of Jiminy and the princess. Just how much is she extending herself? Magic isn't exactly an unlimited resource and he can only imagine how much trouble this cottage has been. His hands tremble. "Magic in these woods gettin' us all in hubble- trouble. Gettin' you in trouble. I make good on it, I protect ya... Protect ev'ryone. I don't wanna go. Know m'well ov'rdue... but I can't see anybody gettin' hurt anymore. When y'got-" Doc falls silent. His hands begin to shake so much that he has to pull them away from his work, growing fearful that something might happen to any precious ingredients. "Or the princess... S-so many times. Jim, I ain't...! I... Be angry at me. Mad, be mad... I was gettin' comfortable wit' seein' ev'rybody go befer me, but... not like tha'. Please." His voice grows more strained and even a little parched as his weary eyes search Jiminy. "B-be angry at me...but I ain't gonna see tha' sorta stuff keep happenin'. I'll keep th' damn promise if it means it give ya chance to live all sorts o' normal... free an' normal." What was normal? He kept saying that. A normal life. A normal community. No more dark magic, at least for a time. Safety. Calm. Normal. No fear. Yes, normal. One night without a nightmare.

[mysteryshoptls]

SR Ruggie Bucchi Apprentice Chef Personal Story: Part 2

"Master Chef"

(Part 1) Part 2

[Kitchen]

Master Chef ー Ruggie Version ～Let’s Make Quiche 2～

Ghost Chef: While we wait for the oven to heat up, let's get the filling ready!

Ghost Chef: Normally, we would cut off the spinach roots, but did you know that you can actually eat the whole thing?

Ruggie: Yeah! The pink part of the roots's got a ton of nutrients, and is super delish. Much more sweeter'n either the leaves or the stems.

Ghost Chef: That's right. So, let's use every bit of the spinach this time, even the roots. Make sure you completely wash the dirt off.

Ruggie: 'Kaaaay

Ghost Chef: Cut the onions along its visible lines into thin slices. Then cut the bacon into bite-sized pieces.

Ruggie: Got it～

Ghost Chef: You're doing great. Now, let's fry all the chopped-up ingredients in the pan.

Ruggie: Kay, first, the bacon. Then, we let the vegetables completely soak in the flavor of the bacon fat.

Ruggie: I never get to buy this kinda good bacon, so… I have to make sure I use it all up.

Ghost Chef: Mmmm～ it's starting to smell pretty good! Here, let's take the pan off the heat, and let it cool slightly.

Ruggie: The pie crust just finished bakin', and it looks like the fillin's and egg mixture are the right amount for this size too.

Ruggie: All that's left is to bake it… But man, I'm getting' a bit nervous, since this is my first time makin' a quiche this big.

Ruggie: I gotta be careful to not spill any of the fillin' and sloooowly place it in the oven… There we go.

Ruggie: And the temperature of the oven is… just right. This should bake it through and through.

Ruggie: I'm beggin' ya… Please be a tasty and filling quiche…!

[Cafeteria – Judging Venue]

Ruggie: (Looks like it's been baked perfectly. I got a big, beautiful quiche, just like I was hoping～♪)

Ruggie: (This should fill anyone up with just one slice… Don't think I gotta worry 'bout my dinner tonight.)

Trey: You look to be in a pretty chipper mood, Ruggie. Did something good happen?

Ruggie: Oh hey… Trey-san, you're my judge, huh. Man, just my luck to get someone who actually knows how to cook.

Trey: Hahaha. You don't need to freeze up like that. If it's tasty enough, I'll give it a good score.

Ruggie: Ahaha… Please be super nice…

Ruggie: 'Kay, so, before it gets cold… This is the quiche that I made.

Trey: Oh, it's a lot bigger than I was expecting. There's a bunch of ingredients in the filling as well.

Ghost Chef: For this dish, we used Ruggie-kun's suggestion to use up all the ingredients without wasting a single thing.

Trey: Cool. It's good to see you taking this class seriously. I'm impressed.

Ruggie: Not really. Here, here, please eat it before it cools too much.

Trey: Right, right. Okay, let me dig in…

[bite, chew, chew] …

Trey: Yeah, this is pretty good. The consistency is thick, so it's very filling, and I can taste the flavor of the bacon in every bite.

Trey: Hm? There's something with a little bit of a crunch there. Did you put in a root vegetable in this?

Ruggie: Of course you'd notice, Trey-san. You’re half right. We put some spinach roots in the filling.

Trey: Actual roots, huh… It's actually a good flavor. This is the first time trying them.

Trey: And this smooth texture and mellow tartness… Is this cream cheese?

Ruggie: Bullseye. When I checked the kitchen fridge, I found some remainin' cream cheese that was nearin' its expiration date.

Ruggie: I didn't use it this time, but I bet I coulda used some canned clam chowder in place of the cream too.

Trey: Yeah, that sounds like that would be pretty delicious. A quiche is a dish where you can change up the appareil pretty liberally, so it's worth trying new things out.

Ruggie: Appareil…?

Ghost Chef: That's what the filling of a quiche or tart is called. You know your stuff, Trey-kun.

Trey: I mean, my family does run a cake shop. I did learn about it when I was making tarts.

Ruggie: I guess that's not a word that my gramma woulda ever used…

Trey: …Whew, that was delicious, Ruggie. I feel like I could eat this over and over again.

Ghost Chef: Well, if you'd like, would you like to bring some home? We baked quite the large quiche, so there's plenty leftover.

Ruggie: !?!?

Ghost Chef: After all, it'd be really ironic if we used up all our ingredients, only to end up with leftovers.

Ghost Chef: Since we worked especially hard on this, I bet you want to see it enjoyed by… Eh, what's wrong, Ruggie-kun? That's quite the ferocious look you got going.

Trey: Haha… I'll have to refrain, even though it's delicioius. I wouldn't want Ruggie to hold a grudge over me.

Ghost Chef: A grudge…? Hm?? What does that mean?

Ruggie: You don't gotta worry about it, Chef! I'll take full responsibility for any leftovers and bring aaaaall of it home.

Ruggie: 'Cause it'd be "such a waste" if the quiche I worked so hard to make ends up uneaten!!!

(Part 1) Part 2

[daryl-dixon-daydreams]

Words: 2,675 Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader Reader pronouns: she/her Era: Alexandria Warnings: Fear, disturbing imagery, language, sexuality, mentions of anxiety/panic attacks A/N: This is part of a series! Find the previous parts on the Masterlist! Summary: The group brainstorms ideas for taking on the Saviors, while Y/N and Daryl explore their new closeness.

Your name: submit What is this?

A few minutes later you were all strategizing in Jesus’s trailer. It was a full room, and you and Daryl hung out near the back, listening as Rick explained what had happened when The Saviors came to search Alexandria the previous night.

“We didn’t know. I didn’t know, if you were really out,” Rick said, looking to Daryl. “And they didn’t say anything about you,” he added, nodding in your direction. “I didn’t know what to think. I hoped you were out but I—” He shook his head. “They tore the place apart. Negan was there. But, obviously, they left empty handed.” He sighed heavily, staring down at the floor. “We came here because it’s time for us to start making plans. To fight this. To fight them. Especially now that Daryl and Y/N are safe. They don’t have any bargaining chips, nothing else to hold over our heads.”

“Hell yeah,” Daryl said, straightening up. “We’re ready.”

By the time the serious discussion was done, you were exhausted, but then everyone stayed gathered around eating and catching up, enjoying a brief moment of joy. The whole time, all Daryl could think about was that you were right next to him and he wasn’t touching you. He couldn’t stop thinking about your lips on his, the struck look on your face when he had finally gotten up the courage and grabbed you and kissed you back, the smile on your face, you straddling his lap... And he wanted to smooth his hands down your back, tangle his fingers in your hair again. It was sending warmth running through him and he couldn’t focus on anything else, despite how happy he was to hear that everyone back home was okay and how glad he was to see them.

You glanced at Daryl occasionally throughout the evening and he always seemed to be far away somewhere. You had no idea that it was because he was thinking about you.

“Goodnight,” you said, standing on the threshold of the trailer, Daryl waiting just outside. The Alexandrians had headed up to bed already in the main house.

Maggie smiled kindly and returned the goodnight, giving you one more hug. “See ya in the mornin’,” she said.

You met Daryl at the bottom of the steps and he nudged his nose up at you and started to lead the way back to the trailer you were sharing.

“You were quiet. That whole time,” you said. “Everything okay?”

He glanced back over at you and smiled, nodding. “Ya. Better even. I just—was thinking about somethin’ else. Couldn’t stop.”

“What’s that?”

He simply gave you a look and pulled open the door to your trailer, nudging you inside first. He shut the door behind him and locked it as he did each night. When he turned, you were standing there with an expectant smile on your face. “Hey,” you said, reaching out and lightly grabbing his sides. He thrilled at the contact. “I just want to make sure you’re alright. Really,” you said earnestly. “A lot has happened.”

Daryl’s blue eyes were downcast and you did see a shadow grow on his face as he thought about his time at the Sanctuary. But then he thought about you appearing in the growing light as you opened the door to his cell, and how you wrapped him up in your arms, and kissed his forehead and his cheek, despite how filthy and miserable he was. He nodded at you. “I know. ‘M fine. And we’re alright. Or, we’re gonna be, right?”

You nodded. “Yeah,” you agreed, smoothing your hands lightly up and down his sides and landing them on his hips.

He gave you a look and you quirked an eyebrow at him, not sure what it meant. “What?” you prodded him.

“Your hands on me,” he murmured, biting his bottom lip. He hesitated just a moment before he wrapped his arms around you a little shyly and tugged you into him. “You wanna know where I was that whole time?”

You smoothed a hand up his strong stomach and chest, resting it over his heart. He felt like he was paralyzed beneath your touch for a moment. You could feel his heartbeat under your fingers. “Mhm,” you said, a little starry-eyed.

His eyes studied your face. “I was right here. With my hands on you and your hands on me.”

You smiled up at the archer but couldn’t wait a moment longer. You stood on your toes and pressed your lips against his eagerly, which gave beneath yours softly. The intensity grew and you arched into him. You pulled his bottom lip in between your teeth and bit it gently, eliciting a growl from deep in his chest. He traced his fingers up your spine and tangled them in your hair, pulling you in against him and kissing you hungrily.

When you finally pulled back, you studied his face for a moment.

He smoothed his hands from your shoulders, down your arms. There was a somewhat uncertain look on his face.

“Hmm?” you asked, lifting a hand and running your fingers through his hair. He shut his eyes as it sent him tingling with goosebumps and electricity.

“What’s this all mean?” he asked.

Your eyes flitted between his. “What do you want it to mean?” you asked, pressing your palm against his chest again, a little nervous now awaiting his response.

Daryl thought for a moment. He knew what he wanted. He wanted you. All of you. To himself. He wanted to protect you, keep you safe, make you happy, take care of you. He wanted to fall asleep with you in his arms and wake up the same way. He wanted to be your home. But saying that was an entirely different matter. “I want… I just want ya to be mine,” he finally said.

“That’s what I want. And for you to be mine.” You smiled up at him softly.

He pressed his lips together as was his habit when he was nervous. He looked down at your hands and took them softly in his, smoothing his thumbs over your silky skin. “Already am. Have been for a good long while,” he admitted.

“You should have said something sooner,” you replied, biting your bottom lip.

“Ya should’ve too.” Daryl let his eyes drink you in and they inevitably fell on the bruise on your neck left by Negan. He immediately felt a rush of rage and you saw his eyes darken with it.

You looked away and pulled back slightly, but Daryl didn’t let you break contact with him completely. “Did he—what was he like with ya? Did he ever hit ya or—”

You stared vaguely downward, your eyes stinging a little with humiliated tears you tried to keep in. You shook your head.

Daryl’s exhale came out as part growl. “What he did is bad enough. Maybe worse. He treated ya like property.”

Your eyes were still downcast and Daryl took in the pout on your lips. “He always says it like you chose it. Like you had a choice. But the truth is you don’t. And you can’t say no to him, not really... You just comply with whatever he wants, out of fear or because you’re holding onto what you’re protecting. He has total control of you. He possesses you. And yet he smiles and acts charming like he didn’t blackmail you into being there.”

Daryl’s chest was swelling with rage again. “I know.” He tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. “But he ain’t ever touchin’ ya again.” Daryl took in your downcast expression. “C’mon. C’mere.” He grabbed your hand and pulled you over toward the bed, sinking down on it, his back up against the headboard. “You’re safe,” he said softly. He gestured to you with a tilt of his chin and you sank down next to him, shutting your eyes as he folded you up against him, wrapping an arm around you, and smoothed his hand over your upper arm. His fingers found the scar some of The Saviors had left there during what felt like another lifetime, the one he had stitched for you not too long after you met. He traced it lightly.

“That time,” he said softly, “when ya got this. They tried to take ya back to him?”

You nodded.

“You were goin’ out there and huntin’ em on your own? Since Aaron brought you to Alexandria?”

“Even before then.”

“Christ, Y/N. Ya coulda told me. I woulda helped ya.”

You looked up at him. “I wasn’t ready to tell anyone what had happened to me yet. I was still burying it. But I think I’ve realized that—I never would have been ready. You’re never really ready to talk about something like that. And I didn’t want to pull anyone else into it, make them a target.”

Daryl sighed and you felt the expansion and sinking of his chest beside you. He rubbed a hand across the back of his neck. “Ya… ya, I know…” he said, thinking about his own scars, his own wounds. “C’mon. Let’s get some sleep now.”

You settled in against him more deeply and shut your eyes.

_ _ _ _ _ _

“Mmm, you know you always were my favorite, right?” Negan caressed your cheek and studied your face.

“I bet you say that to all your wives,” you retorted flatly.

This only made him chuckle and smile. “No. I really don’t. You know what I like about you?” he asked. His hands slid down your back to rest in the curve at the bottom of your spine. “You’re a badass. I could probably send you out to run any one of my outposts, be in charge of one of our serving settlements, and you’d run it almost as well3 as I could myself. And then you could come home and slip into a nice cocktail dress and a pair of high heels and you turn every head in the room. That’s rare. And gets me all warm and fuzzy in all the right places,” he said biting his bottom lip. He pressed his pelvis into you and you could easily feel the growing erection underneath his jeans.

“Yeah, well, you know I don’t like your process,” you said softly, looking away.

“I know. And that’s a goddamn shame. What a waste of your talents.” Negan leaned in and began kissing your neck. The stubble on his face was rough and it scratched your skin a little too hard as he pressed into you. His fingers wound into your hair and he tugged it to one side so he could nibble along your jaw toward your ear. “Now, I think tonight I want you to do something special for me,” he whispered gruffly into your ear. “Because I have had one hell of a day.”

You gasped yourself awake like you were emerging from frigid water, completely disoriented, and ready to fight. You felt hands on you as you tried to make sense of where you were in the darkness and you struggled against them violently, pushing away from the figure in front of you and toppling onto the ground. “Get off me! Fuck! What the fuck?! Stay the fuck away from me!” Still not knowing where you were, you scrambled backward in the darkness until your back hit a wall. Just then there was a tremendous noise and you heard the distinctive sound of a door busting open. The next second you were blinded as a light was turned on.

It was then that you snapped back into reality and remembered where you were. “Y/N!” Daryl was yelling your name, leaning over the edge of the bed toward you, his face desperate, frantic. “S’alright! You’re safe!”

Maggie and Sasha had busted in through the door and both were pointing guns in your direction, looking bewildered. Enid was standing behind them on the steps peering in with wide eyes.

“What’s goin’ on?” Maggie demanded.

Daryl snapped around to look at her. “Hey! Put the damn guns down!”

“What the hell happened?!” Sasha yelled.

Daryl climbed off the bed toward you and knelt down. “I said lower the goddamn guns!” he snapped again. He could see that you were trembling. This time Maggie and Sasha listened, finally realizing there was no real, material threat in the room. “Hey. Y/N. S’alright.” Daryl held a hand out toward you, palm out, hesitantly inching closer. “It’s just me. You’re alright…”

Your chest was heaving as you gulped in air. “It was—it was him. He was—” You squeezed your eyes shut. “Fuck,” you muttered, leaning your head back against the wall. “Fuck. I’m sorry… I’m sorry. Shit…” You covered your face with your hands and it was easy to see you shaking.

Maggie and Sasha exchanged a sad and concerned look. Enid touched Maggie on the sleeve. “Come on. Everything is alright. Daryl’s got this.” They retreated, closing the (now busted) door softly behind them.

You pressed your fingers to your closed eyes and tapped your head back against the wall again in frustration. “It felt so real. I—I thought I was back there. He was—” you broke off.

“C’mon. Get on up off the floor. C’mere,” Daryl said, holding his hand out to you. You accepted it and allowed him to pull you to your feet.

“Did I—did I hit you?” you asked him, studying his face, cupping it with your shaking hands.

“Nah.”

“Fuck,” you collapsed against him, burying your face against his chest. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Daryl smoothed his hands over your back. You were still shaking slightly. “Quit that. Ya ain’t got anythin’ to be sorry for. I pulled a knife in the middle of the night the other day, remember?”

You pressed yourself flat against his chest.

“S’alright,” he soothed. “C’mon and sit down. Ya need anything?”

“Maybe a lobotomy,” you said wryly, sinking down on the edge of the bed.

“Nah. Just—takes a bit of time.”

You glanced over at Daryl and he could tell there was something specific on your mind that you were struggling with. “I—Do you think I should have done it?” you asked him.

He cocked his head in a question.

“Killed him.” You stared at Daryl and he could read the turmoil inside you. “After he would—” you felt sick and broke off for a moment. “When he would spend the night with me… he’d just be there. Next to me. Asleep. And I would sit there thinking about how I could do it. I could just end him. Do you think I should have? Maybe it would have stopped all of this.”

Daryl shook his head. “Nah. It wouldn’t have been enough. And it would have probably gotten ya killed. After bein’ there, seein’ what it’s like, what they’re like… It can’t just be him. It has to be more.”

You were grateful for his words and nodded, albeit a little hesitantly. You gently stroked the side of his face and gave him a small smile. He nudged his head back in the direction of the pillows and you nodded, climbing up the bed and flopping back down with a heavy sigh, trying to let go of the tension that had hold of you. Daryl laid right behind you, pressed against you with his arm draped over you, holding you tight. The steady cadence of his breathing and his weight made you feel safe, and you eventually fell asleep again and didn’t wake until the morning.

[ducknotinarow]

Best to get this over with. Taking a deep breath, he knocks on Raph's door once before fully entering without waiting. "So, uhm, heeeyyyyy." Head ducks into his shell completely, just waiting for the reaction of him being there. ( eheheheh. :'3 - Leo )

|Muse interaction

Raph was sprawled out on his floor, he had filled out his punch card and recently had cashed it in. It was a nice distraction. Well, that. Raphael had been doing his best to not even think about it, if he didn't think about it then it was like it wasn't happening right? Yet of course he couldn't there was a Leo-shaped hole in their family. Try as he could to help the other with it he just couldn't see how it hurt and tore at everyone in thier own way. Donnie locked himself up more lately. Lifting his newest bear up so he could look at it better. "I don't think I'm doing enough for them."

He hears the knock on his door and is quick to stash the bear behind his shell as he rolls over onto his side to look. Hadn't even been given a chance to answer when he heard it open up. arching up his brow when he saw them walk in. It took the snapper a moment to react. Stayed silent as Leo just strolled on into his room. Not because he didn't expect it to be them, okay well yeah that too. Leo had been gone for a good time. So they were the very last person he expected to see right now. Eyes widen as it dawned on him, slow to move from his place on the floor. Lifting up to his feet. "Leo" he asked looking them over out of habit needing to make sure they were fine. "So, uhm, heeeyyyyy."

That was all they had to say before dropping thier head into thier shell. There was so much to say, so much that could be said that SHOULD be said even. Why did you leave? Where did you go? Was it because of me? Of course Rapheal was hurt and upset set with Leo for just disappearing like that.

And yet.

His eyes were so easy to flood with tears as he made his way over to them, quick to close the space between them and throwing his arms around his younger brother, dragging them into a tight hug they could leave again if he held them. Words we all caught up in his throat millions of things he wanted to say and ask, just letting himself sob a little Leo was here he was safe. Leo was here. He swallowed heavily trying to choke back his tears lifting his brother up off the ground slightly to keep them from evading him when he did start to talk. His mind was buzzing with so many things to ask and yet only one question came out of his mouth. "Leo are you okay?" They didn't seem to be hurt, it was his biggest worry in all the time spent looking for the slider that was stuck somewhere hurt. Donnie insisted they just left them and didn't want to be found. Didn't take long till they were tugged back into a tight hug, "I was so worried somethin' happen to ya!" he confessed oh he had been tormenting himself over the many possible things that could have befallen his youngest brother. Of course, he was mad at Leo but the relief of seeing them? it outweighed it. "why..." he start with a tone crack as he tried to peek and look into thier shell facing them seem better for what he had to ask "why didn't you talk to me?" Raph had an idea of why Leo did what he had of course he did. "You coulda told me what was going on ya know? I woulda listened?" maybe it was Raphs fault "no I should of gone to you when you started acting like that. I'm sorry I didn't notice it sooner Leonardo."

[darkconsumed]

Travis had never given much thought to how he would die. He knew, at least, that it would be either directly or indirectly be caused by his addiction. That he would slip up and use again and that would be the final time or it would catch up to him eventually via a heart attack, stroke, or something else. Taking his own life, though, that had never been in the cards for him because he knew he couldn't go through with it. That at the last second he would change his mind, but he also feared that if he did go through with it, he would mess it up. That something worse than living with the pain and guilt that tormented his mind would join it all.

So that night in the bar, he had no intentions of killing himself. He simply wanted to get as close to dying as possible without committing. It was reckless and there was a chance that it might not even work, that he wouldn't see what Natalie had seen or what Lottie had seen. But he had to try and well, you know how that went. The minute he began to feel the last bit of air in his lungs leaving him, he knew he had fucked up. That he should have listened to Lottie and the rational side of himself that had warned him against doing it. It didn't matter much now did it? Woulda. Coulda. Shoulda.

Death was one consequence that Travis couldn't escape paying and dealing with. He wasn't suffering anymore, not really, but he was still there. Bound to this earthly plain and because of her, because he couldn't leave her like this. She was the only one that he feared hurting if things did go south that night, knowing that he would break yet another promise made to her. That Natalie would be the one to suffer in her grief of losing him and he could see it in full effect right then and there. And it pained him or at least it would have pained him if he could physically feel anything.

The desperation and enthusiasm in her voice and movements, he knew him being here was cruel. That he was adding to her pain or that he would once she realized what was going on; that he wasn't really there. Because in truth, he could have simply been a hallucination brought on by her mind trying to comfort or torment her, making her see him as she did the last time. He wore the same faded blue jeans, work boots, and flannel he had that night and other times before. Whatever this or he was, it was for Natalie to interrupt, he was simply there.

Sad twitch of lips brought the smallest of smiles to his face at her enthusiastic greeting. It did not last nor did his position in that chair at the table he had never sat at before. With her final batting hand to touch him, Travis disappeared for a second before he reappeared on the bed that he had never laid in. Arm was placed behind his head to prop it up as he crossed his ankles and looked towards her. "Ya know...I can't remember if we ever stayed here or not..." he murmured, disregarding her comment and question for the time being. "Probably stayed in somethin' similar, huh?" he mused, eyes looking away from her to look at the walls.

@scatcrccio gets yet another plotted thing.

Once upon a time his abuela had told him about spirits. It was around Día de los Muertos and she told him how they, the living, needed to celebrate those that had came and passed. To remember who they were, what they did, keep them alive in their memories and hearts. At the time, he didn't really understand the importance of the holiday or why he had to participate in it ( so many Tio's and Tia's amongst others he had never met. ) That was almost to be expected from a seven year old who simply wanted to participate in the eating of food and the several desserts.

The significance of what his grandmother had tried to teach him early on did not take full affect until those final moments. Hearing, surprisingly, is the last thing to go when someone is dying. But he can't remember hearing anything except for the stillness of the night air in that barn. It was his thoughts, though, remembering what his abuela told him—the living are supposed to keep memories alive including all that the deceased had done in their life—filled those last thirty seconds. What had Travis really done in or with his short life of forty-three years? Nothing. Had spent twenty or so years wasting and throwing away a life that he should have been fortunate enough to have. He had survived! He was still there!

He hadn't deserved the lack luster life he was given. He couldn't remember doing a single good thing with his time except for, well maybe, one thing; loving Natalie. Then again even that, that hadn't gone as well as it should have and he had known how bad it was but never really committed to fixing it. Maybe it never could have been fixed, maybe they had just been too broken beyond repair that they would have spent forever hurting one another. But he had loved her regardless of the pain and torment they had put one another through and had tried to make that be enough.

It wasn't, not in the end. There wasn't anything he could do now except to watch over her. So that's what he did, was doing in that moment as he watched Natalie all but dive to the tattered and outdated carpet of her motel room. It wasn't the worse thing she had done ( nor himself for that matter ) but it wasn't a pretty sight. None of it had been; watching her go back and forth between staying sober and taking small steps into a murky lake that would swallow her whole if she allowed it. And knowing that still, even in death, he was the root of her pain and suffering.

"I woulda at least tried to get it on a piece of paper 'fore doing that," Travis said as he sat at the small table. Head was tilted with an arm resting on the table as he watched the brunette sit by her bed after getting what cocaine she could from the carpet. "Then again we've put worse things in our bodies then fifty years of dirt and grime, huh?" he mused, leg stretching out as he got comfortable.