#would she actually celebrate her birthday im not sure….. i dont remember if they ever throw her a little birthday party or anything
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happy make a terrible comic day. see her bald
#i love ravens bald era very much ok#wonder girl#cassie sandsmark#garfield logan#beast boy#raven roth#raven dc#bbrae#<- i guess kind of?#i had to google what that was called#teen titans 2003#make a terrible comic day 2024#would she actually celebrate her birthday im not sure….. i dont remember if they ever throw her a little birthday party or anything#in the comics . but whatever she deserves to be happy
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I was thinking right now about how sad it is that Harry never properly celebrated his birthday. You know how we go all out on children's birthdays, inviting people and making theme parties, well Harry never had that .
On his first birthday, he celebrated over a small tea "party" , with his parents and Bathilda, with no other family members and friends around . In her letter , Lily said that it was okay since he wouldn't remember, and while she was right , the fact that it was his first and last birthday with his parents and it wasnt even proper, saddens me so much .
Growing up i know for a fact that the Dursleys didn't celebrate his birthday. Remember when he went to Hogwarts and for Christmas they send him a single toothpick ? What about Dudley's hand-me-downs? Sometimes i actually think that they didnt even tell him untill he started attending kindergarten, or sometime earlier when his birthday was . I belive that it was easier that way for them , not having to bother with his questions , but of course when Harry saw that there were no children like him , with no parents, loved ones , or idea as to when they were born , he started asking questions.
Something that i had forgotten about , and only remembered when i reread Chamber of Secrets, is that for his birthday, Harry sang to himself the Happy Birthday song, and that broke my heart . Just thinking about how many times he had to do that because noone cared is terrible.
The fact that the second birthday cake he ever got was when he was eleven , a grown boy, is even worse .
On the third book , he doesnt even recall it being his birthday, he completely forgets about it , that's how little birthdays mean to him .
"He never got to celebrate a birthday with Sirius" , now that line destroyes me, because i know sirius felt terrible for missing his godson's birthday, and i also know that getting a letter saying Happy Birthday, is all Harry wanted , because growing up he didnt even get as much as that .
His sixteenth birthday was the only one that came closest to a nice celebration, Harry had Remus , the Weasleys, so practically most of his loved ones , but i know for a fact that not having Sirius there , and having lost him just a month ago tore the boy to pieces. There was a war going on and he wasnt safe , especially at that time, so of course it wasnt the best , and in my opinion what he deserved.
On his seventeenth , he was worrying about the fact that in a week he would be god knows where , doing god knows what . Voldemort was more powerful than ever, and i think that the only time he was a little at peace was when Ginny gave him her present . It was the first time Harry didnt mention the war , or the deaths of people , or his approaching death , he was at peace and that was short lived because he got into a fight with Ron and then he was feeling miserable because reality hit him harder than ever , he realised he didnt have a future ahead, and that this could be his last birthday for all he knew.
When he finally started enjoying his day , the minister arrived and ruined everything. After he left so had some of the guests, and the ones that were left seemed to feel uncomfortable.
Im sure that when the war was over , he didn't celebrate his birthday, i dont think he cared much , especially knowing what happened just a couple of months ago and how selfless he is .
So knowing that today he is celebrating makes me feel good . Knowing he has a family now , and that there is no ministry or Voldemort chasing his guests away is amazing. If anyone deserves a good birthday, that person is Harry James Potter.
#harry potter books#harry potter the books#harry james potter#Harry Potter#the golden trio#the golden trio era#harry potter angst#angst#headcanon#harry potter headcanon#harry potters life#birthday#happy birthday
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20 12 2022
wow it has been a while since I last posted. i dont remember the pet names i gave people anymore, so ill just have to use new ones. so yea things havent been going very well. after all these years im still unable to do work, so i cant really hope for anything in life. id like to say im seriously considering an heroing but im probably objectively still far from that point. its almost like i wish i was actually considering an heroing because that means ive already hit the bottom and dont need to worry about feeling even worse than i do now. looking back, its hard to see all the factors that led me here, but i guess i can share a couple things i experienced recently. im still not sure whether to write this as if anyone except myself will ever read it, so idk if "sharing" makes sense. anyways, benny visited recently, and shared how after breaking up with his long-term girlfriend of 3 years, he had a "wayward" phase where he just fucked hella girls basically. and he felt super bad about it because hes a pretty devout christian. i understand why he shared it to me because im in a unique position of understanding christianity with my christian background but not actually christian so he wont just get judged extremely hard by the church. despite that, it still kind of felt like a brag to me, and a little insensitive since im a fucking virgin, which idk if ive told him explicitly but he surely must have considered the possibility. its unfortunate because i consider benny to overall be a really good and understanding person. of course i didnt tell him any of this and just took it as he shared for hours about his conquests and his inner conflicts from just having easy access to sex, oh woe is him right. i told him to just never meet girls like me, maybe he got the message after that. more importantly i had a dream, let me try to remember the details precisely. i was in a clubhouse of some sorts (maybe for pingpong?) that was pretty packed with people, it started small but slowly grew since i guess i love fantasizing in my dreams that my presence helps communities grow. one day we were celebrating something, maybe a member's birthday or something, and i was hanging out with one of the newer members jessica towards the back. I forget what we were talking about but it segued into her starting to whisper to me something like, "you know, I might not have made it to this clubhouse ... I was very close to killing myself the week I first came here". by the tone of her voice and her expression, she was clearly being extremely vulnerable and entrusting to me. my first instinct was to say meekly (in my usual style), "well im glad you're here now" or something like that, and then the dream abruptly ended. I realized after I woke up how utterly pathetic that was. I was so concerned with how my response would appear to her, I was only concerned with staying in her good graces. In the past I was not so concerned over my appearances to this pathetic of a level. If I was thinking about her instead, I would have let her know that she did not have to worry anymore, that she should never have to experience that misery again, and I would make sure of it. I really wish I can say that and mean it one day. I'm of the opinion that the most useful individual definition of reality is simply one's experiences. In that sense dreams are real until you wake up and realize you've been dreaming. That's why I never want to lucid dream again, at that point it's as real as simply fantasizing during the day when you know you are fantasizing. Dreams are precious because they are the only way you really experience dreamlike scenarios, and in today's one I fell gravely short. I'm sorry jessica. I have some other things I want to write but I think I will save those for another day, with the usual disclaimer theres a 50% chance this is my last post ever.
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Quarantine Series: Birthday Date Night
Summary: It’s Y/N’s birthday, but Tom faces a slight problem. How does a boyfriend top off an accidental proposal while his girlfriend is working on her birthday...again!
Check the Rest: Burnt Out | A New Look | Secret Cuts & Kisses | Breaking Friendships |The Birthday Week | Movie Night | Silence is Golden?
Masterlist
A/N: Sad to say that Quarantine Series may end real soon with 3 more parts to go 🥺. Also this was inspired by my birthday which just happened fairly recently! Thanks for all the support!!
“Tom, mate. You’re pacing back and forth is making me dizzy.” Harry warned Tom, as he lied down on his bed, laptop in hand.
“Sorry, but I don’t know what to do! Y/N’s birthday is in a few days and I have absolutely no plan.” Tom reasoned as he plops on the couch across from Harry. “I mean I already blew the proposal which was supposed to be her birthday gift, but thats gone to shit.” He mumbled, biting his thumbnail.
“Just be happy she said yes.” Harry chuckled as he recalled the day. “I mean has she given any hints? You know Y/N, if there’s something she really wants, she’ll tell the whole world.”
“I know, but she hasn’t said a word and everytime I do ask her, she says ‘I dont know.’”, Tom groans as he rubs his temples. “I just want to do something really nice for her.”
Harry rolls his eyes as he continues shopping for his gift for Y/N. He and Y/N always loved to share memes and compete in board games, so it was only fair he’d get her an exclusive edition of Exploding Kittens. The one with a hard cover box, that plays mariachi music when you open it up. To be fair, he also really wanted it too, so imagine all the rounds they could play in a single day. “You always say this every year, but ever year you always deliver. I don’t know what you’re so worried about.”
Tom sits still to ponder on his brother thoughts. “Yeah..Yeah I guess. Maybe I could take her out for a picnic lunch date. I know she’ll love to get out of the house. I’ll ask her to take off on Friday and it’ll be perfect!” He plans excitedly. He stands up, proud of his well thought out plan, already thinking of the perfect place to settle, the blankets to bring, and the smooth moves he’ll plan to swoon her away. It was completely foolproof.
Just two days before, Y/N displays a noticeable frown on her face. Sludging through the house, only made Tom drop his smile twice as fast when he noticed. “Hey, darling is everything all right?” He asked with worry written all over his face. Deep down, Tom prayed, hoping it was just something she liked was sold out or that she found out the ending of Hamiliton or something..anything but...
“My boss needs me to work Friday. Apparently they think it’s a great idea to put me as the President in charge of IT while he’s out.” Y/N says in a disappointing tone. “Im sorry, I know you wanted me to take off and I definitely wanted to for my birthday, but I guess it’s not happening.” Y/N’s heart feels heavy as she sees Tom’s equally disappointed face. “I did ask for Monday off, so whatever it is you planned we can do it then!” She mentioned, trying to cheer him up.
Tom let out a sadden sigh. He knew it wasn’t her fault, but of all days? Right when he was about to leave for Berlin in less than 4 days? Right when he and Y/N could spend another birthday together? At this point Tom felt like a hopeless man, as he stood in front of his girlfriend, who showed remorse and sorrow. Her long hair draped over her shoulders, and lips forming into that adorable pout that he could not resist. It almost made him smile, but only a little. “I know, but its not the same! You’re turning 24 and you have to work? Can’t you make some excuse?” He asks coming closer to her, smiling mischieviously.
Y/N’s brows knit together as she cautiously observes Tom’s behavior. She knew that look, that smile, that little bite lip he was pulling. “Oh no. No. No. No.” she says repeatedly, resisting the charm. “Im not gonna make some excuse.”
Tom comes even closer, his face bending down a little to meet her eye level, smiling as he runs the very tips of fingers on her sides. “C’mon darling, break the rules a little. I promise I’ll make it worth your while.” He whispers kissing down her neck. “Please?”
Y/N looks up and away from those deep brown eyes, still resisting. “Tom, you know I can’t, no matter how bad I want to say yes.”
Tom draws a line up to her jawline with the tip of his nose. His breath warm against her soft skin. He hums and smiles, “Is your boss a fan of spiderman? What about his kids? I for sure remember you telling me Zach was a huge fan.”
Y/N laughs as she rolls her eyes, but she found it so endearing. The fact that he even remembered your boss’ kids’ name even though he’s probably caught a glimpse of them once or twice during her zoom meetings. “No. You are most definitely not using your celeb status to get me off from work.”
Tom shrugs his shoulders, as if it weren’t a big deal. He wasn’t one for flaunting his fame, but if it meant he could spend another day with Y/N, he would gladly use it. “Please...” he pleads one more time. “Just wanna spend time with my girl on her special day.”
Y/N thinks about it. She really did want to take off, and Tom’s efforts were quite convincing to say the least. It was only a matter of time before Tom would have to leave for Berlin, and Y/N wanted nothing more than to spend every minute with him. But Y/N also knew that if she didn’t do as she was asked by her company, the higher ups would probably have a bad impression of her or worse...fire her on the spot. Yet she knew her boss was also an understandable and chill guy. It wasn’t like she couldnt take off, just not when he’d be out at the same time, especially when she was asked to be in charge of the entire department.
Then, it hit her. She quickly excused herself out of the room to talk to her boss, and quickly came back to Tom with a smile on her face. Tom loved the way she smiled, and how her one little dimple formed on the right side of her mouth. He knew she was really happy, and he had just an idea of what it was. “You got the day off.” He answered excitedly.
“No.” Y/N responded, “But I did ask for half a day, so I’ll be free after 12.” Y/N continues as she comes closer to Tom, wrapping her hangs around his neck. “Hows that for a compromise? And I’ll do anything you wanna do for the rest of the day.”
“Good because you’re gonna love what I have in store for you.” Tom says, almost ready to brag about his well thought out romantic plan. He was ready to treat her like the queen she was on her birthday. How could anything go wrong?
On that faithful Friday, Tom woke up Y/N to many many birthday kisses. Reciting how beautiful she was, and how he couldn’t wait to celebrate with her. Reluctantly he had to let go, as she padded her way to the bathroom to get ready and head into her makeshift office for the next 5 hours.
Tom was all smiles, excited to take Y/N out. While everything felt like it was going according to plan, his mates had other news. “Ninety percent of thunderstorms?!” Tom exclaimed to his best mates in the kitchen.
“Yeah, it’s gonna be a major storm out there. Probably the worse that London’s had in a while.” Tuwaine informs as he reads the news on his phone.
Tom became a stuttering mess not sure how to justify or ask how that could be possible when it was beautiful this entire week. “But...But...It’s so nice out now!” He says discouraged. “No, this ruins my entire plan.”
“Hey mate, dont be like that. You can still find a way to celebrate it. Maybe you can do something romantic inside?” Harrison offers. Thats when it clicked. Harrison smiles, knowning the answer to Tom’s problem. “Yeah..make a date night here. We can set up the living room to be all fancy like.”
“Yeah! Tuwaine Harrison and I can be your waiters and make your dinner. Then just leave you two alone to do whatever you want you want.” Harry suggests.
“Just please...don’t mess up the couch.” Tuwaine groans, thinking about the potential possibity. “Im getting grossed out just thinking about it.”
Tom looks at his mates, giving thought into the new back up plan. He smiles at the group saying , “Lads, I think we got a new plan.”
Its exactly three in the afternoon when Y/N logs off from her laptop. She looks up at the window to notice how dark and dreary it was outside. Thunder was booming, and rain droplets came down hard, splashing off the window. It was her favorite kind of stay-in weather, but she hoped it didnt interfere with Tom’s plans if they had anything to do with being outside. As she opened the door, Harry and Tuwaine greeted Y/N with their own gifts and hugs. They made sure, she got dressed up, and led her downstairs. “M’Lady, your fiance will be right out.” Harry says in the most posh accent he could muck up.
Y/N rolls her eyes, and the moment she sees Tom walk into the living room, her heart skipped a beat. He dressed up with a bouquet of flowers and balloons in his hand. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.” He says. “You look so beautiful.”
Y/N takes the gifts from his hands, placing them on the table. She runs to Tom, kissing him passionately, savoring the sparks that came and left with every push and pull of their soft lips. “You had plans to go outside for my birthday didn’t you?” She teases.
Tom laughs, as he throws his head back. “Yeah...I was planning a picnic and everything, but thats why I made sure Plan B would just be as romantic.” He takes her hand as they sit down at the candlelit table, eating, drinking , and talking away about anything and everything. When it was sometime Harrison, Harry, and Tuwaine brought out a cake that Y/N had only been fantasizing and drooling about since May.
“No way! How did you guys order it?! I thought they didn’t do international shipping for Milk Bar!” Y/N exclaimed.
“Actually..they didn’t. But the recipe was online and we made it ourselves, with Sam’s help of course.” Harry answered, as he placed the candles in the center.
Her jaw dropped for a good ten minutes as she looked at the rainbow sprinkled cake, and the fluffy white frosting that sit perfectly in-between the layers. The crumbs on top were surprisingly uniformed and formed a perfect circle border, she was very impressed with them. Harrison lit the candles as all the boys sang along...off key of course with hints of laughter coming off every other note. Tom moved to her side, placing his arm around the back of her chair and leaned in to place a soft kiss on the top of her head. “Make a wish darling.”
Y/N looked up to see her favorite people in the entire world, smiling. “I dont need to. Everything I could possibly want is right here.” Y/N quickly blew the candles out and everyone left with their fair share of the cake. It was just Tom and Y/N left. They quickly changed out of their fancy clothes and back into their sleep wear, ending the night with watching Stardust and cuddles in the dark. Y/N tries to look behind her to see Tom’s face, who in turn looked down at her. She smiled at him whispering, “I love you.”
Tom quickly leaned in to capture her lips before answering, “I love you too. Happy Birthday Y/N.”
Taglist:
@hollanddolanfangirl @parkerspillow @joyleenl @kihyunwifes @holland-bowen @in-a-lot-of-fandoms-tbh @marvelobsessedteenager @viwihere
#tom holland#tom holland imagine#tom holland x reader#peter parker#peter parker imagine#peter parker x reader
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1581.
Have you ever been to Las Vegas? yes, i have! its one of my favourite cities
What did you have for breakfast this morning? i had scrambled eggs and hash browns
Do you have any loose change in your pocket? no pockets and i hardly ever leave things in my pockets
Do you like Taylor Swift? i dont mind her, she has some catchy songs
What’s your favorite Disney Channel movie? camp rock haha
If you met your favorite celebrity, would you be calm or star struck? id try to stay calm, id probably be super nervous just being in their presence though
Are there any lights on in the room you’re in? nope, its day time
What’s your favorite subject in school? it was visual arts
What’s your favorite holiday? christmas, it always means ill have a week or two off work!
Do you ever have to do yard work? nope
Is your school close to your house? ive been out of school for a longggg time but it was a 5-10 min drive
Speaking of school, how did you get there today? -
Do you think Bad Romance is a catchy song, or an annoying one? its a good song! i dont love it but im not surprised at how massive it got
Do you use perfect grammar online? honestly, in my previous surveys i would but now i cant be bothered. i use perfect grammar day to day when working so i just sorta wna chill and not focus too much when i do these now
Are you currently using a laptop? yes
Do you have any live versions of songs in your music software? most likely, i used to love downloading them back in the limewire days
Did/do you listen to Britney Spears songs? i loooooved britney when she first blew up. and i still do! i dont listen to her stuff too heavily anymore but i still love it
Is it a windy day? nope
In the past week, have you ridden in a taxi? no
What shorthand do you use the most? if were talking about typing, i still text/chat people with ‘u’ instead of ‘you’
Do you ever wish on stars at night? no, ive never seen a shooting star
What color are your eyes? brown
What album is the current song you’re listening to off of? not listening to music, i have the tv on while doing this
What are you doing after you finish this? not sure, maybe another survey
In your opinion, what song is the most overplayed right now? i havent listened to the radio in forever
Are you in a band? no
How clean is your bedroom? pretty clean!
Is there a pen within reaching distance of you? no
Are you sitting at a desk? no, im in bed lol
Does your favorite band have a male or female lead singer? male
Do you normally shut your bedroom door before you go to sleep? of course ol
Have you seen the movie Moulin Rouge? i feel lik ei have once but i do not remember anything about it
Would you ever dye your hair a different color? yes
Are there any framed pictures in the room you’re in? yes
Have you ever been to a Broadway show? not in broadway... ive seen the musicals lion king and aladdin in my city though
Do you watch So You Think You Can Dance? i did when it first came out
What’s your favorite movie soundtrack? none really stand out to me
Do you prefer group or individual work? individual, id rather just count on myself
Do you have a key to anything besides your house? car
Are you wearing anything with stripes? nope
What time did you go to sleep last night? i think 1am
Did anyone tell you you were beautiful today? no
What show did you last watch? american horror story
Do you think you’ll do anymore surveys today? maybe one more
What’s your favorite ice cream flavor? run and raisin
When was the last time you stayed home from school sick? years ago when i actually attended school lol
Could you ever complete a 500-piece puzzle? i probably could, i just wouldnt have the patience
If you could run a red light and not get caught, would you? nah. id rather not risk mine or others’ lives
Do you like to listen to music as you do your homework? i dont have homework
Did you think Adam Lambert’s AMA performance was really that controversial? i dont recall, this survey is probably really old
Do any bands flat-out annoy you? nah, i just dont listen to them
Do you have a mirror in your bedroom? yes
Was today a birthday for any of your friends? yes actually! ill need to greet him
When was the last time you rode in a limo? never been in one :(
Do you take naps daily? no. i wish!
Do you still make Christmas lists? yes haha
Do you watch the show Dexter? i did. apparently theyre rebooting it which is exciting! the ending was pretty trash
What’s the background on your phone? its a dark cityscape of nyc
When were/will you be a a sophomore in high school? -
Are you scared of any animals? cockroaches. also i live in australia so while im not afraid of snakes and spiders, im pretty mindful of them
Have you ever been to any sort of convention? yup! ive been to sexpo and a wedding expo lol
Which song did you last listen to on repeat? probably a kehlani song
Where do you want to live when you grow up? around here still
Are you currently using a blanket? yep
Are there any songs that make you cry? not really
How many siblings do you have? one
What are you doing this weekend? its saturday today. im doing nothing. tomorrow im going on a picnic with friends
Do you prefer swimming at the beach or in a pool? pool, its so much more comfortable than a beach lol
When was the last time you had a haircut? hmm... maybe june?
Which musical instrument do you think sounds the prettiest? a harp!
Are you in band or chorus at your school? no
Do you know what you want for Christmas? nope. i dont ‘need’ anything.
Do you watch fireworks on New Year’s Eve? most of the time!
Is your birthday within the next three months? no
How long is the song you’re listening to? not listening to music
Are you anticipating anything this week? yeah, kinda waiting to see if were going ahead with buying some land
Is your mom or dad the older parent? my dad
Have you taken the SATs yet? -
Do you watch anything on E? i dont have e
Are you going to get off the computer now that you’ve finished this? nah maybe one more survey lol
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with age comes wisdom ( or at the very least, entirely unneccessary celebrations )
Characters / Pairing: Fukawa Touko / Naegi Komaru ( focused ), Syo / Komaru, Warriors of Hope
crossposted on ao3
Notes: happy @tokomaruweek week everyone!! i love these funky wlw so i am going to try and have some stuff up this week, but i probably won’t manage to do the whole week / i'll go back to do the ones i miss afterwards? we’ll see.
for today i decided to combine the birthdays + warriors of hope prompts.
i’m also just ignoring canon’s timeline bc god knows i did not want to figure out that bs sorry dr3 ily but i dont love you that much just know it is somewhere post sdr2 / pre dr3 probably?
i also use they/them for syo ( nonbinary hc ) and while there aren’t any specific trauma mentions, given the group of characters this revolves around, there’s refrences to the fact they have shit lives. and some lighthearted murder jokes and self-deprication?
Summary: nothing says happy birthday quite like babysitting her ( favorite ) group of brats
It’s just her luck that this would happen— a coincidence for sure, but that doesn’t make Touko any happier about the whole thing.
This is the situation: they don’t usually see the ( former ) Warriors of Hope much. The kids stay on their side of Towa, and her and Komaru tend to stick closer to the adults. The adults are the ones that need to be kept under supervision, in her opinion. Not that the kids are blameless, but is there much reasoning with brainwashed kids? No. Of course not. Are the adults also practically brainwashed and hard to reason with. Yes. Would this all be easier if Future Foundation was involved? Yes. Yes it would, but for obvious reasons they are not ( they have all agreed to omit some information from public record for the sake of those involved, and right now Naegi’s stunt with the Remnants have Future Foundation’s attention away from them ).
Sometimes Komaru takes some of the things that they get over to the kids because things are rough enough as it is, and Syo will go with her because they can keep the Monokuma off their tracks better. Or you know, because Syo is generally more helpful to Komaru when it comes to things like that. She’s not jealous.
Allegedly— Touko does not know this for a fact herself since she hadn’t been fronting, and only learns this second hand while she is in the middle of typing up a report to send back to the foundation— Kotoko is the one to bring it up, casually handing off some of her share of the cookies Komaru had made for them, to Jataro. An early birthday present, she had said ( pointedly ignoring Nagisa, who’d pointed out she had given Jataro the ones he hated ), before turning to Komaru to ask if they could throw a party. A small one. With no murder, because that would be ‘totally not adorbs’. And no adults, because they stink ( it goes unsaid that Komaru and Touko themselves are the clear exception to this rule, which is some kind of progress, supposedly ).
That seemed like a fairly reasonable request, according to Komaru, who’s only response was to ask when his birthday was. And then accidentally lets it slip that hey, that’s the week that Touko-chan’s birthday is! And that’s how Touko finds out that apparently, she’s having a joint birthday party with the kids because Masaru managed to turn a party into a competition, somehow? Touko has no clue what that actually entails, because Komaru refuses to elaborate.
( Also, at one point before leaving, Komaru had tried asking Jataro if there was anything she could get him; to which he’d remarked, “A new mask?”
...Yeah, Touko can’t blame her for not knowing what to say to that, even if Komaru had spun it as not the most self-deprecating thing he could have said, which was an improvement? She personally disagrees, but whatever )
Here, she should point out the obvious fact that she does not want to really celebrate her birthday, let alone have a party for it. Because those kind of things lean so far into the zone of things Touko doesn’t really know how to handle, that it makes her close to uncomfortable. And if— if she had humored herself in imagining how she would ideally spend her birthday this year; quite frankly, it would be very quiet and boring and only with Komaru. Not with a group of ten year olds. Ten year olds that she might think of rather fondly, but ten year old brats all the same.
( It’s not like she has any alive friends: if Touko acknowledges the other survivors, justifiably they are too busy with more important matters to fuss over a birthday. They aren’t kids anymore. Some of them hadn’t ever really been like normal kids to begin with, but that’s besides the point )
“Look at the bright side,” She starts, and she bites back a snide what bright side and remark about how that’s all Komaru’s good at ( it’s not. She’s more talented than she gives herself credit for ). “None of you probably have really positive memories when it comes to birthdays or parties, so even if it isn’t the greatest, at least the bar to please should be pretty easy to clear!”
Touko thinks she probably gets the point she is trying to make here, but Komaru’s complete and utter lack of tact doesn’t make for the best delivery. “Are you trying to...to make me feel bad? S-So sorry my life was complete sh-shit growing up.”
“No! That’s not what I meant at all!” Komaru pouts at her. “Does that mean you’re not interested in having a party?”
It’s not like she’s so cold-hearted and selfish that she’s going to say no to that. Well, no, that’s not quite true, Touko might be just that; but it doesn’t really matter either way, because Komaru gives her best kicked dog impression, so she says ( a less than enthusiastic ) no, she doesn’t mind, yes you can have a party; even if she thinks she’ll probably regret that choice.
Okay, if you are to be honest with herself, some part of Touko that never got to be a normal child doesn’t entirely mind the thought of a party, even if it’s...not the most ideal scenario, the impractical fantasy situation that lives in her head. But if she says that aloud, Komaru will either take it too seriously, use it as an excuse to celebrate things more often, or something else that probably has consequences that she doesn’t want to think about. And also admittedly because if she says it aloud, she has to acknowledge it, and maybe she doesn't want to get her hopes up over something as stupid as a party.
( There’s also the fact that, deep in her extremely repressed memories of Hope’s Peak before the tragedy, she does remember parties. Birthdays. Celebrating things with her classmates, if somewhat forcibly so. She has no desire to remember those things, so those feelings remain repressed with most of her trauma )
It’s easy to not acknowledge any of that when she has to deal with the sudden onslaught of a headache that is Syo forcing themselves into their shared headspace, hand rubbing at her temples. Not trying to co-front, she can tell they aren’t trying to snatch control from her ( for now ), just forcing her to pay attention to them. It works, even though Touko has told them to not do this specifically because of how irritating it is for her.
I could scare the kids into cooperating? It’ll save us a headache and a half! Syo offers, maybe too eagerly. Their ideas of scare and cooperate are probably different from her own. Still. She also knows Syo is aware of more than they are letting on, given that they had been present when this conversation had occurred, but she doesn’t think she’ll get much out of them in that regard.
No. Touko tells them firmly. It’ll be counterproductive, Komaru won’t let you do that, and they’re all traumatized enough without you adding to that.
Boo, you sure about that? Consider it a birthday gift from me!
No. She repeats herself sternly, and she feels them withdraw a bit after that. Ugh, Syo hasn’t had a chance to front much recently, now that she thinks about it. Since they usually only take over when she’s in danger, and she hasn’t really been in ( as much ) danger now that things are starting to calm down. Well, relatively speaking. Syo is probably just looking for an excuse to be allowed to front, since it’s probably rough going from being very present to rarely getting the chance to be out: akin to going cold turkey on an addiction. That’s not exactly her fault ( or theirs ), but maybe she’ll ask Komaru if she’d be okay with hanging out with Syo more, if only to placate them a little, before they try something more drastic.
“Everything okay? That was Syo, right?” She hears Komaru ask after a few minutes, and Touko rubs her eyes and blinks. “You looked a little frustrated.”
She considers telling her the truth, but no point in getting her concerned over nothing. She’d like to figure out what she wants to negotiate with Syo firstm so she’ll leave that conversation for another time. “Fine. They just...ugh, just wanted to make sure I was okay with it.”
“And you are okay with it, right? You aren’t agreeing just because I asked?” Touko thinks she begged more than she asked, but she’s pretty sure Komaru will only sulk if she brings that up.
“I wouldn’t let you if, if I was really opposed to it.” Probably. She...trusted Komaru, or something like that, so she figures she’d probably be more honest with herself and not mentally torture herself by putting herself through something she has no interest in. “But...what are you even planning on doing to celebrate? I can’t im-imagine we’ve really got much around here that we can use for a party.”
“Ah. Uhm.” Komaru looks a little embarrassed at that. “About that. I was kind of hoping you and Syo might help pitch in. You don’t mind, right?”
You’re hopeless, she wants to mutter, but—
Yeah!!!! Syo wakes right back up upon being mentioned, no sense of self awareness at all, much to your annoyance, but it’s not like you completely disagree with the feeling that is shared between you two.
“You— You really bit off more than you could chew, hm...? Good thing this wasn’t supposed t-t-to be a surprise.” She quips, leaning over to peer at the paper she’d been making her notes on. “We’ll help, just tell us what we...what we need to do.”
“Thank you, Touko-chan! And Syo too!” Komaru sounds somewhere mixed between grateful and relieved, and casually plants a kiss on her cheek as if it’s no big deal—
She said my name last, so the kiss was for me! She knows Syo is intentionally trying to provoke her and get a rise out of her ( yeah, a rising sense of jealousy ), but puts that aside for the time being because Komaru’s blabbering on like nothing happened.
“I know we probably won’t have the whole day to ourselves to do whatever—” Correctomundo, Dekomaru! “— but I’ll make it up to you on your birthday, okay? We’ll do something that you want.”
“You don't...there’s no need for that.” She forces out between gritted teeth, trying to ignore the flustered feeling in the pit of her stomach, chewing around a fingernail ( what an unattractive sight to follow that ). “Because— ugh, don’t repeat th-this, okay? What I want to do is spend time with...with you. That’s all. So don’t go...you don’t need to go out of your way trying to do s-s-something over the top. Stick to being normal.”
“Really? You’re sure?” Komaru sounds a little uncertain, but happy enough to pull her into a hug, despite her grumbled complaint. “Oh, but Syo has their own birthday, don’t they? So I should probably ask them what they want as well, right?”
“Don’t make me repeat m-myself. It’s embarrassing...” Touko huffs, but lets herself be held against her side, just for a moment. It’s nice, though she won’t admit it ( it is better than any real gift that she could receive ). Syo is kind enough to back off long enough to let her have this moment. “You can ask them later— focus on, on what you need to plan.”
By something short of a miracle, they are able to pull together a party that is not a complete disaster, even if Komaru probably has a point when she says the bar to clear is a pretty low standard for all parties involved. The closest she has to an actual concern is the very narrowly avoided fight that almost breaks out when Masaru and Kotoko fight over which one of them should give their present first— which is apparently the competitive aspect of the party? It’s probably meant to be heartwarming, if it were not such a foreign thing to Touko. Which Nagisa is quick to put an end to: because this is how they would treat Monaca, which is not inherently healthy, and she’s glad that at least one of them can recognize that fact now. Jataro spends the entirety of the fight trying to hide behind her long skirt and, relatable kid, and rubs the top of his head while Komaru tries to both scold them for fighting and appease them because they’re, well. Kids. Who still need to learn some things and have time to unlearn things.
So yeah, it’s a good party— for not being on her actual birthday, she’ll consider it one of the better memories Touko has associated with the day. The start of many, she’d like to hope.
#tokomaru week 2021#tokomaru#toukomaru#komaru naegi#toko fukawa#touko fukawa#danganronpa#udg#dr:ae#* zhi writes#glad to have the excuse to finally post something w/ these girls.#i have several long wips w/ them w/ no motivation to finish :/
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landing in your heart: failing
han jisung
genre: angst, slight fluff
word count: 1.8k
warnings: location is in north korea, kissing, y/n gets lost in the dark, mentions of suicide at the end, not proofread, grammar mistakes, if theres anything i missed, lmk!
summary: as jisung helps y/n escape north korea, the plan was ruined. however, y/n has other plans to escape which leds to something that shouldnt happen.
note: i rushed :p
part four of landing in my heart
landing in my heart information
“were here to see your honesty and see if you’re trading goods or smuggling humans to other countries” “why would i do that?” the police stomps on the blue hallow board, which was where you and jisung were hiding.
“open up!” was what you both heard underneath. “jisung! what do we do?! you’re a soldier you should know what to do. geez” you silently yelled out. “in south korean dramas-” “what?! this is no time to talk about this” you freaked out. “i’m going to do something. now look at me and don’t be startled. look at me and nothing else”
with that, jisung slams his lips into yours as the door opened.
“o-oh- what is that?” the police asks the man and closes the board. “huh? open it back up”
as the police opens it up again, jisung slams his lips onto yours. as they told you guys to get out, they police asks for jisung’s id. “ah, you guys shouldn’t be doing that here. alright, turn the boat around”
turning the boat back to the shore, you were about to protest of how close you were to getting home. with tears slowly falling down, you dropped onto your knees as jisung looked at you with sad eyes.
back at jisung’s home, you two separated. jisung went to his room as you went to the living room to sleep. jisung sat on his floor and thought about ways on how to help you get back home safely. his thoughts was disturbed as he heard the front gate opening then slamming shut.
jisung quickly runs out of his room and sees the blankets folded nicely with a note on top.
‘thank you for everything. i dont want to cause anymore trouble for you so im going to find my own way on getting back home’
dropping the note, jisung quickly finds traces of where you might be.
-
“alright, i cant just stand here and wait. i need to do something.” you say then grab your walkie talkie. “this is y/n one, this is y/n one. if you can hear me, please say yes” hearing nothing, you assumed it’ll work on the way back home.
jisung finds you on a mountain with your paraglider, ready to take off. “yoon y/n!” jisung yells your name out. ‘huh?’ you thought. how did he find you so quick?
“h-how did you-” “y/n- what are you doing?” jisung asks while catching his breath. “i’m going to paraglide down” you answered. “huh? you cant! you’ll get seen with a naked eye and get shot, no matter if you land in the south or north” being shocked with jisung’s reply, he noticed your walkie talkie was still on.
“how long was this on for?”
the security department got an alert from the mountains. cheolgang rushes to go to the mountain that you were on which makes you scared that this spot that you are standing, will be your death spot.
suddenly, jisung brings you towards the edge, hugs you tightly and jumps off the mountain. “hold on tight” you told him. “im sorry about earlier, i was just frustrated and angry. in fact, i’m grateful of everything.” you hugged him tighter as jisung did the same, feeling some type of way inside his chest.
later that day, jisung went to the market as you were resting in his house. asking for the sales man for coffee beans, remembering that you wanted to relax with coffee, and gives him money and thanking him. manbok is also at the market, buying food for his family. before he could pay, robbers came by and stole his wallet.
jisung sees what happens and quickly runs towards where the robbers are running. after running, he runs towards the gang and ends up fighting with them. one of the gang members, who wasnt involved with the fight, moved behind jisung and almost stabbed jisung- until manbok shows up and stops the guy before stabbing jisung.
“i dont know how to thank you” manbok says. “no, its okay. theres a lot of pickpockets around here so just be careful next time.” manbok nods his head as jisung goes on his own way.
-
currently at the house, you discus with company 5 that you hope jisung will get promoted soon so that you can go home quickly. hearing the knock on the gate, you leave they guys and check to see who it is.
opening the gate, she sees the neighborhood women, asking if she wanted to come to young-ae’s birthday at her house. you thought about it and figured out you wanted to show them what fashion is actually. “mhm, ill meet you ladies over there soon” you smiled and closed the gate.
telling the boys where you were going, they left as soon as you did.
“young-ae unnie, what a lovely dress you have on” you greeted youngae. “u-unnie?” the other women asked in shock. “ah thank you, wait whats your name?” youngae ask. “o-oh uhm its yejin” you replied, feeling bad that you lied.
during the whole celebration, you showed youngae and the others your fashion senses on youngae and with everyone amazed, you’ve finally made the women minds change about you.
-
while you were out with the ladies, jisung visits the repair unit facility. he asks for a sample of the metal the was used for the trucks and then thanks the worker. returning home, company five lets him know that you went to youngaes house when jisung calls them about your whereabouts.
heading to youngaes house, he hears the happy voices. knocking on the door, youngae gets up and sees who it is. “ah, captain han, what are you doing here?” youngae asks. “im here to pick up my fiancee” he replies. as soon as jisung says that, you pop up behind youngae.
waving a goodbye to the others, you walk with jisung, both of you two smiling. spending some time with each other, you felt some type of way towards jisung, but you couldnt put your finger on it. ‘was it, love? no, it cant be. you cant be falling in love in north korea’ you thought.
back in south korea, your dad annouces that sehyeong will take over the family business, which results sejun and sanga angry. with this plan, the two brothers had another argument about this.
after the night full of fun activities, the morning came once again. jisung gets up before you and brews you a cup of coffee.
you wake up to the smell of coffee and immediately get up and run over to the kitchen. “here, try this” jisung hands you the cup of coffee. tasting the coffee, you felt as if it was the best coffee you’ve ever tried. thanking jisung, you shot him with heart with you fingers. “w-wait what did you just do?” jisung panics. “mm nothing, just a thank you” you told him and went on your day.
jisung, who is left alone in the kitchen, is confused of what you just did to him. he tries to do the heart on his on fingers and stops immediately and heads to the base.
“yah, hyunjin, felix, what does this mean?” jisung asks and does the finger heart. “oh my god, it means she disrespects you all the way.” hyunjin gasps dramatically, which make jisung slap him on the shoulder. “no, it just means she love you. and she wants you to have her heart” felix answers.
jisung sighs and tells hyunjin and felix to leave him alone for awhile.
-
currently in pyongyang. yiseo is out with her mom and uncle, shopping for a outfit. she runs into her long time friend after 10 years of studying aboard. “yiseo! how are you?” her friend asks. “i’m doing well, what about you?” “ah i’m doing well too, c/n, say hello to yiseo!”
“oh my god! myeongseok look at the baby!” yiseo’s mom exclaimed. “hi there baby” yiseo dropped to the child’s height and and smiled. “yiseo-ah, when will you have one with jisung?” “o-oh i haven’t-” “they’re about to be married” yiseo mom comes in. “i’m sorry, but we have to go”
as jisung left the house, the neighborhood women came to the house and asked if you wanted to go the market with them. wanting to leave the house desperately, you agreed as the four of you happily went to the market together.
asking youngae where the beauty products are, she leads you to the booth. the seller shows them the variety of products from the south. one of the products caught your eye which was one of your product, la vie en rose. “omo, youngae unnie, you should get the la vie en rose one”. youngae nods her head and buys one for everyone.
meanwhile in south korea, chansik talks to sehyeong, saying that you might've flew into north korea and everyone should start looking over there. sehyeong doesn't believe what they just said so he quickly dismisses the meeting, making sure they don’t spread any rumors which deflates chansik, wanting to find where his boss is.
back in north korea, yiseo was on her way to the village where jisung was staying. as the taxi breaks down, the driver apologizes and went to look for help. as minseok comes back from hunting, he sees yiseo almost having a breakdown. he decides to help her and make her way to jisungs.
in the state security department, cheolgang does his research about division 11, suspicious of your actions and behavior. “there was no other women in division 11 who has returned in 15 years sir” one of the soldiers tells him. cheolgang sighs in defeat, trying to know you better. wanting to know how and why you're here.
during the time at the market, you left the group as another stand caught you eye and walked around the market. as soon as the sky became dark and nobody in the market with you, you started panicking, and become cold. jisung comes back to the village with a bag in his hand and the neighborhood women comes to tell him that they lost you in the market.
jisung rushes over to the market, noticing that it was full of darkness. he takes out one of the scented candles he had bought for you earlier and lit it up, putting the candle over his head.
looking up, you see a candle in the air. walking towards it, you see jisungs back. “j-jisung?” you whispered. jisung turns his back and feels relieved. jisung quickly wraps his arms around you as you sobbed into his chest.
“thank you for saving me”
additional ending:
in switzerland, you were about to jump off a cable bridge after the doctor told you to go sight seeing before you really wanted to end your life. ending the voice message to send to your family, a guy looked at you, who was supposedly named jisung.
yiseo, who followed him to switzerland, wanted to take a picture of her and jisung. jisung asks you if you could take it for them, wanting you to get off the bridge before you finally do it.
“he could do better” you mumbled as you you snapped their picture. after the picture was taken, yiseo thanked you. you smiled and walked away as jisung watched you, wanting to tell you that everything will be okay.
END <3
#stray kids#jisung angst#jisung fluff#han jisung angst#han jisung fluff#stray kids angst#stray kids fluff#skz angst#skz fluff#skz#jyp stray kids#kpop angst#kpop fluff#kpop#Crash Landing On You#stray kids smut#skz smut
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JULIA’S FICS MASTERLIST
so it’s my wifes ( @fredheads ) birthday and im a flop who doesnt have her birthday fic ready (it’ll be done... before the end of the month. absolutely should not take that long but thats the only definite timeline i have lmao) SO to celebrate, i think you all should read her fics and leave nice comments because it’s what she deserves :)
MULTI CHAPTER (unfinished)
She's The One (fem!fredsythe)
Just Like Heaven (fredsythe, alice - fred escapes the Sisters au)
talk about a dream, try to make it real (fredsythe, gladys - college au)
quiet mercy (fredsythe - the OG fred & the sisters of quiet mercy fic)
Papa (fred and artie exploration)
wanna be your backdoor man (fredsythe - h*rny neighbor antics)
With a Girl Like You (fred and gladys friendship)
all our costliest treasures (baby fredsythe at christmas julia i would like to see more... its your birthday i should not be requesting things my apologies)
but your kids are gonna love it (archie and jughead - back to the future au i never saw that movie so i cant say for sure but they do time travel so that checks out to me)
Riverdale High's Last Annual Father-Daughter Winter Fling (fred takes veronica to the father/daughter dance because hiram is in jail =/ )
i say the phrases that keep it all going (different takes of fred fp archie and jughead dying in each others arms julia where is the fredsythe one... just asking)
MULTI CHAPTER (finished [according to ao3])
wouldn't it be good (ensemble - everyones paired up and has to raise an egg)
love is like a heat wave (fredsythe summertime antics)
burnt toffee (halice - working at an icecream shop, falling in love, v cute)
if only in my dreams (penelope lies about having a boyfriend)
let nothing you dismay (alice cooper fixing christmas)
there's a blue light in my best friend's room (hal and fred bonding hour)
The Trials of Cheerleading (or, "Throwing In The Megaphone") (the parentdale bible just read it and forget anything else anyone [ras] has ever told you)
fred andrews adopts a gang (bet you cant tell what this is about)
from the rich to the poor they are mostly unkind (i think this is a sweet pea centric fic?? julia really has something for everyone but dont expect her to do this again)
fp's adventures in domesticity (fp taking care of the andrews household while fred recovers from getting blasted in the chest)
Oblivion (all the times fred has experienced god)
west of memphis (jarchie post 107 thats all i can tell you idk)
ONE SHOT
Wherever you go i'll be with you (fp and archie - a timeline after freds death)
that's as close as i'll get to loving you (fremary - fred asks mary out)
i'm only good at being bad, bad (gladys hating her deadbeat husband <3)
and all the miles in between (fp and tom on the bus to basic training)
excerpts from the same party (freds interactions...at a party... the title is pretty self explanatory but who doesnt love a party fic ammirite ladiez)
don't you know these days you pay for everything (fred, fp, mary - i remember this being fp playing wingman to get fred and mary together cuz he likes mary better than hermione.... read more to find out if im right)
tying faith between our teeth (fredsythe - au where fp goes to college and doesnt ruin his life)
and they were roommates (fredsythe - another college au)
The Construction Tree (jarchie - idk what this is about i dont read kid fics im sorry... but julias a bomb ass writer so im sure the jarchies will love it anyway)
flowers grow through cement (fred gaining weight and feeling insecure)
night creatures call and the dead start to walk in their masquerade (HALLOWEEN FREDSYTHE BABYYYY!)
get me a prescription for that one perfect touch (fredsythe sick fic)
i don't know where else i can go (more hal and fred bonding hour)
everybody's got a hungry heart (fredsythe sexy time with food... that sounds weird.... listen either youre into it or youre not)
not so typical love song (fp and mary bonding hour)
all the redemption i can offer (fremary after the shooting... im pretty sure... listen i have a bad brain i cant remember things just read it)
Simply Irresistible (fred is a ho)
took the words (right out of my mouth) (four times fred and fp say ‘i love you’)
if you wanna get it done you gotta do it yourself (fp and mary loving fred... who is a ho)
people livin' in competition (more fp/fred/mary nonsense with fp gay pining what a good triangle i would have liked to seen it...)
buy me a ticket on the last train home tonight (mary works at youth crisis hotline and fred calls in)
that's what they say when we're together (halram post high school au)
a good old fashioned romance (hiram flaunting his wealth instead of displaying emotions)
you don't know what (you) got (fred has great friends even though hes a bit of a putz)
watch your weight (more fredsythe food shenanigans)
Valuable Lessons Learned On The Tilt-A-Whirl, or "Babe, You Ought To Quit This Scene Too" (alice hermione fred and fp go to the fair)
what once was (jughead and the andrews after freds shooting)
you must remember this (i have no recollection of what this is about but it sounds jughead centric)
takes guts to be gentle and kind (idk what this is either lmfao but i know julia saved moose and midge in it... idk midge but good for her [granted this also takes place after 202 so keep that in mind])
FP Jones and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad House Party (or, "Nothing Good Ever Happens At One Of These") (oh i remember this one.... mmmm. title tells you all really)
and so please help them with your youth ( ‘fred teaches archie to walk. archie returns the favor’)
andrews & son (more fred and archie post 201)
Blueberry Pie (fredsythe - my review of this fic is just me clutching my chest saying ‘oh god, oh fuck’)
never drill for oil on a city street (part 1 of mary working at a youth crisis hotline and fred calling in and i should put this above the other fic but like... you can figure out one and two on your own i believe in you)
The Perils of Faking Illness (or, “two times Fred Andrews faked sick to get out of class and one time he actually needed a hospital”) (read the title)
healing, in three parts (fred fp archie and jughead attempt a roadtrip)
all along the watchtower (#fredandrewsisriverdale)
guess that we were too much of the same kind (fred getting visitors in the hospital)
sometimes wonder what's beneath the mess you've become (fred and alice bonding hour)
nice day for a white wedding (fredsythe hospital times babyyyy!)
The Unexpected Perks of Feminist Activism (or, "Fingertip Rules") (fred gets fucked in a skirt by fp thats all you need to know)
Any Way You Want It (reggie x moose idk what it is but if you like them here you go)
fun, fun, fun (till her daddy takes the t-bird away) (beach antics! freds a menace but fp loves him anyway...)
hands over the ears of my heart (fred and hermione share a bed but platonically)
the apocalypse comes sooner than you think (fredsythemione antics)
small as a world and large as alone (a series of drabbles about archie jughead and fred post 104)
do a good turn daily (archie x reggie post 103)
seven minutes in heaven (archie and reggie picked for 7 minutes in heaven)
tell me every terrible thing you ever did (archie drops jughead off after the pep rally)
#READ HER WORK!#riverdale fanfiction#idk why im bothering tagging this i doubt its gonna show up anywhere thanks to tumblrs rules but whatever
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Unknown (A Sterek Wrong Number/Celebrity AU)
11.09 PM Unknown Number
>I’m writing songs about you again.
11.20 PM Unknown Number
>its stiles btw.
>in case you deleted my number
>I did.
>I mean I deleted yours.
>but I still remember it apparently
11:41 PM Unknown Number
>I only have 2 lines so far
11:57 PM Unknown Number
>I bleed you from my veins.
>I grieve you like I love you.
>alone.
>its better with the chords.
>u were always better at writing lyrics than me
12:34 AM Unknown Number
>u were better everything than me
2:00 AM Unknown Number
>I hate that I miss you
2:07 AM Unknown Number
>do u want to hook up?
>I promise not to propose again
2:15 AM Unknown Number
>im sorry.
>ignore me.
>im drinking
Derek blinked bleary eyes. His phone screen was the only source of light in his room, as he read through the flurry text messages.
What the hell is a Stiles?
2:17 AM Unknown Number
<I think you have the wrong number
>Lydia?
<no
>oh thank fuck
>I mean
>I’m sorry
>for disturbing ur sleep
>but im just glad I didn’t drunk text my ex all of this
>bullet dodged right?
>is this what near death experiences feel like?
<I wouldn’t know.
>of course
>hey
>seeming as I have you here can I ask you a quick q?
>all my friends are asleep
<probably because its 3am
<everyone’s asleep
>2.39
>and ur not
>asleep that is
>so?
>I’ll take your silence as a go ahead
>what do you think?
>of the lyrics
<im the wrong person to ask
>never experienced heartbreak?
<no
<all song lyrics just look like bad poetry to me
>oh
>yeah I guess it does
>not everyone can be Rupi Kaur tho right?
<do you want to be rupi kaur?
>sure
>not to be dramatic or anything
>but
>I want to be anyone but me
>think id rather be someone like regina spektor tho
<regina spektor?
>singer/song writer
>shes my fucking inspiration
>her lyrics are like poetry to me
>you should listen to her music
<I dont really listen to music
>what the fuck?
>are you an alien?
<no?
>nice fucking try ET
>thats exactly what an alien would say
<…you got me there
>akdjfen
>is this you admitting I was right?
<no
<but this is me going to bed
<because its now 4AM
>already?
>fuck
>ive got an early start tomorrow
>good night random stranger
>and thanks
>for listening
>or reading ig
<good night
//
“You’re late.” Laura frowned, arms crossed.
“Are you going to let me in?” Derek grumbled, still feeling the affects of having stayed up until 4AM the previous night.
Laura didn’t argue she just stepped aside to let him through into her flat. “You’re grumpier than usual.” She noted.
“Didn’t sleep well.”
Derek hated the look she gave him then.
The look that said he was broken. The look that said she wanted to fix him.
“Is…Is it the nightmares again?” Laura’s voice dipped to a whisper, like the question alone would be enough to send him over the edge.
“No.”
An awkward silence defended over the two of them, neither knowing what to say.
Derek clung to the silence like a blanket, wishing things could go back to how they used to be. Back to when they knew how to speak to one another.
But this was enough.
It was enough to know that they were both trying. Failing. But trying.
//
2:40 PM Laura
>I’m here if you need to talk.
//
Derek isn’t good at art, but sometimes it’s the only way he can express himself. Words had never been his forte.
So instead he doodles.
Shitty toddler level doodles that he never shows anyone.
Sometimes he thinks if he could bring himself to show Laura she would like it. Maybe she would even understand it.
But there was a bigger chance that she wouldn’t, and he would feel even more like a stranger to his own sister than he already was.
//
10:18 PM Unknown Number
>I don’t remember it anymore
<You have the wrong number again
>No
>This is ‘not Lydia’ right?
<right
>So here’s the thing.
>I always thought if I needed to text her I could
>And I thought maybe I got her number wrong because I was drunk
>But I can’t remember it anymore
<Oh.
>I have some of her things still
>I don’t think I’ll ever get to return it now
>Unless she messages me first
<When did you two break up?
>Last year
>and I know what you’re thinking
>’it’s October’
>and I should be over her by now
>Trust me I know
>So you don’t need to lecture me
<I wasn’t going to
>Oh
<Stiles?
>That’s weird
<what is?
>I forgot I told you my name
<You should throw away the stuff she left behind.
>you’re right
>I don’t like it.
>but you’re right
>…thanks
<What for?
>for listening
>reading**
>my friends are pretty sick of hearing me complain
>so this is nice
<sure
<anytime
>dope
>no take backsies
<am I going to regret this?
>for definite
>you’re stuck with me now
//
That night Derek saves Stiles’ number as ‘Bad Poet’.
//
Stiles keeps messaging after that.
Stiles messages like they’ve been friends for years, and Derek very determinedly does not analyse why it is he always responds.
Even when there are messages dated from Laura from three days ago that he hasn’t even been able to bring himself to open yet.
He also ignores how when he’s messaging Stiles the gaping pit that had made residence in his chest feels just a little less inescapable.
//
Derek can’t bring himself to tell Stiles his name. He can’t bring himself open up, even though there’s a large part of him that wants to.
He’s not above admitting he’s scared.
//
Derek draws Stiles sometimes.
More accurately he draws a vague pair hands texting on a phone, because he has no idea what Stiles actually looks like.
Derek refuses to let himself dwell on that though, because they are happy drawings.
The pictures of Stiles are pretty much his only happy drawings right now.
//
They don’t always talk about Lydia.
Sometimes Stiles messages Derek song lyrics he’s working on.
Other times it’s memes, or just a bunch of emojis.
Once Stiles had just messaged him what Derek could only assume was a list of everything he had eaten that day.
Sometimes Stiles messages in rambles - and Derek can’t always keep up with the boy’s run away thoughts, but even then he never feels lost the way he does when he’s trying to interact with literally anyone else.
And sometimes it’s 2AM. Those are simultaneously Derek’s favourite and least favourite texts.
//
2:02 AM Bad Poet
>sometimes I feel like too much
>and too little
>at the same time
>u ever feel like that ET?
<not really
>its like I’m infinite, and meaningless
>like a never ending echo
>or a recurring decimal
>I just stretch on and on forever but theres no point to it
>I have no depth
<youre not meaningless
<you’re a rhythm.
<like breathing
>…
>was that a regina spektor reference?
<it might have been
>I thought you didn’t listen to music?
<well someone said her lyrics were like poetry
<so I thought I would check out a few songs
>well fuck
>what did you think?
<she’s good
>you spelt ‘amazing’ wrong
<I still prefer poetry
>of course you do
Derek stared at the texts an ache filling his chest.
Derek was the opposite of infinite. Everything he touched turned to flames.
//
10:30AM Bad Poet
<my sister bought me flower seeds
>I didn’t know you had a sister?
<she’s everything I have
>oh
<and I think she’s trying to trick me into therapy somehow
>…with flower seeds?
<yes
>you sound extremely paranoid
>maybe therapy wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for you?
<shut up
>noted.
>keep me posted on how your gardening goes
>also
>as a side note
>you know you have me too right?
>if you ever need to talk or anything, I’m right here for you
<thanks
>anytime
//
On Derek’s birthday Laura insists the two of them spend the day together, and Derek knows better than to argue.
She buys him a cake and they spend hours sat next to one another silently. Two strangers desperately trying to keep hold of one another but with an ocean dividing them.
Once their family had been so alive.
And it was all Derek’s fault that was gone.
They both knew it.
Sometimes Derek wondered if Laura hated him as much as he did.
He was too scared to ask.
//
That night Derek chased the ache in his chest away with a drink.
And then several more followed.
//
1:14 AM Bad Poet
<seh haars me
>sorry bud, you’re going to have to try again
>try spell checking before hitting send
<she.hates mee
>who?
<larn
>are you drunk?
<yeh
<tyongs ndrf
*Out Going Call: Bad Poet*
The phone rings twice before being picked up. “Sorry. Stupid keyboard is so small. Impossible to type.” Derek mumbled, his words slightly muffled by his cheek being pressed into the sofa cushion.
“Wow. You’re really sloshed huh?”
“No.” Derek denied. “Just tipsy.”
“Right. So what was it you were trying to tell me? Someone hates you?”
“Laura.”
“Who’s Laura?”
“My sister.”
“Oh.”
“She looks at me like she wishes she could fix me.”
“That doesn’t sound like she hates you, bud.”
“She should. I can’t be fixed.”
“You’re right, because you’re not broken.”
Hearing Stiles say that Derek could almost believe it to be true.
“I mean it. You’re not broken. You’re just a different shape than you used to be. But the shape you are now is beautiful.”
Derek closes his eyes and lets the words wash over him. “Do you sing?” He finds himself asking.
“What?”
“I know you write songs, but do you ever sing?”
“Oh…” Stiles sounds uncomfortable. “I guess… Yeah. I do.”
Derek hummed in the back of his throat. “I bet you have a nice voice.”
“Th-thanks.”
Derek tried to say something else, but all that comes out is a yawn, which makes Stiles let out a jittery laugh.
Derek tries to memorise the sound of It, but it’s so fleeting, it’s already slipping away from him.
“I think you need to go sleep, ET.”
“Yeah.” Derek agrees.
“Goodnight bud.”
“Wait.”
“Yeah?”
“Could you stay on the phone? Just for a bit longer.” Derek clutched on to the phone like if he could grip tightly enough it would make Stiles stay.
I don’t want to be alone. The words die on Derek’s tongue.
“Sure.” Stiles didn’t hesitate. “Of course.”
“Thank you.”
Sleep pulled at Derek’s consciousness, unravelling his grip on reality.
“Stiles?”
Stiles hummed in answer.
“Your shape is beautiful too.”
A small whimper came from the other end of the phone. “Thanks.”
//
7:50 AM Bad Poet
>how are you feeling today?
<better
>good <3
Derek holds his phone tightly and wishes that he had more to say. Just to keep the conversation going.
He also wishes (not for the first time) that Stiles was more than a faceless entity on the other end of the phone.
But it’s the first time he feels the want like a physical ache in his chest.
Derek had never been good with words, but if Stiles was here in front of him Derek would probably give him a hug.
But everything Derek touches eventually dies, and a larger part of him is relieved for the distance.
//
Derek plants the seeds his sister got him that day.
//
9:48 PM Bad Poet
>would it totally weird you out if I wanted to do another phone call?
>don’t feel like you need to say yes
>I just enjoyed talking to you
>and hearing your voice
>ugh.
>why are words so hard?
<I wouldn’t be opposed to a phone call
*Incoming Call: Bad Poet*
“Hey.” Derek feels breathless as he answers the phone, anxious excitement clawing it’s way up his throat.
“Hey.” Stiles sounds equally out of breath, and that helps.
Derek chews on his lip, scrambling for something to say. “What did you want to talk about?”
“I don’t know.” Stiles admitted. “Anything.”
“Helpful.” Derek said sarcastically.
“I mean. There’s one thing. I didn’t want to ask when you were drunk because it felt a little like taking advantage. And I don’t want you to think you have to answer-”
“Stiles.” Derek interrupts before Stiles could break into a full blown ramble.
“Tell me your name.” Stiles breaks. “Please.”
Anxiety grips his heart. But… he couldn’t stay scared forever.
“It’s Derek.”
“Derek.” Stiles repeats his name in a reverent whisper, as if committing it to memory.
And hearing Stiles say his name makes everything worth it.
//
Phone calls become a regular thing between the two of them over the next month. Always between late in the evening and the early hours of the day.
//
The next time Derek spirals he doesn’t drink before he calls Stiles, but he does cry on the phone.
The next morning he wakes up to a text from Stiles.
6:42 AM Bad Poet
>you need to talk to your sister
And Derek knows he’s right.
//
It’s not easy confronting Laura. He has two separate anxiety attacks on the walk to her apartment alone.
But he forces himself to take the dive.
“It’s okay if you hate me.” He tells her, even though it’s not okay. Laura’s hate might be the only thing in the world that could break him beyond repair.
Laura looks horrified as she stares at him. “I don’t- Obviously I don’t hate you Derek.”
“It’s my fault that they’re gone.” Derek addresses the elephant in the room.
If he hadn’t fallen in love with Kate.
If he hadn’t broken up with her, just to try and prove a point when she refused to say ‘I love you’ back…
There never would have been a fire.
Their family would still be here if it wasn’t for him.
“Fuck that!” Laura let out a harsh noise. “Derek, none of this was ever your fault. You were a kid, and even if you weren’t… You never set the fire.”
“I might as well have.”
“No. If anyone… I was your big sister- am your big sister. But I was so fucking wrapped up in myself. I didn’t even know about Kate.”
The last time Derek had seen Laura cry it had been at the funeral, so it took a second to fully sink in what he was seeing.
He found himself crying to.
“I’m so sorry, Der.”
Derek stumbled forwards pulling Laura into a crushing hug. Laura hugs him back just as tight.
They spend hours refusing to let go of one another.
//
He realises he fell asleep on Laura’s sofa when he woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. But he had no idea where it was, and he was too tired to move.
He feels Laura moving and the sound of the phone ringing gets louder before cutting off abruptly.
“Hello?”
“No - Derek’s asleep.”
“Maybe call at a more reasonable time?”
“Who is this?”
“Your voice sounds familiar.”
“Right.”
“Okay. Bye.”
Derek let sleep over take him once more.
//
2:29 AM Bad Poet
>sorry for calling so late
>you’re asleep so I’ll just take to you tomorrow
//
9:07 AM Bad Poet
<sorry, I was really tried
>no worries man
>you’re allowed to have a life outside of me
<was something wrong?
>no I was just bored, and didn’t realise how late it had gotten
>im fine
>how are you?
<im good actually
<I spoke to Laura
>yeah?
>I’m proud of you
>how’d that go?
<we both cried
<a lot
<and I ended up falling asleep on her couch
>look at you, opening up and shit.
>think I might cry now
<shut up
>literally never
>better men have tried and failed to silence me
//
2:40 PM Laura
>Want to see a movie on Friday?
<sure
//
One night Stiles calls Derek just to say his name in stupid ways, and laugh himself stupid after each one.
“Duhreek.”
“Doreck.”
“Fuck. I’m getting a stitch from laughing.”
“You’re so fucking dumb.” Derek is smiling as he said it.
“Deeruk.” Stiles wheezes out.
Derek just closes hie eyes and listens.
“I’m so fucking glad I know you, Stiles.” The words fall out of Derek’s mouth without much thought.
He only realises the weight of his words when Stile’s laughter pulls to a stop.
“I uh-” Stiles stammered. “Me too. Fuck. You’re the best thing to happen to me in…so fucking long. I’m glad I know you too Derek.”
//
Derek finally admits to himself that night that he’d fallen at least a little in love with the stranger from the unknown number.
//
He keeps trying to draw Stiles, but he can’t. Vague shapes just don’t cut it anymore.
He wants to map Stiles out with his eyes and translate it onto the page.
He wants to be able to see the smile behind the laughter.
He wants.
//
1:58 AM Bad Poet
>do you think you day we’ll actually meet?
>maybe not intentionally
>maybe one day we’d pass each other in the streets and not even know
>maybe we already have
Derek couldn’t imagine a scenario where he wouldn’t notice Stiles.
<is there ever a moment when you’re not talking?
<I think id recognise your voice and know it was you
>maybe your face would make me speechless ;)
<I think id still know
<but if you want to be sure… I could send you a picture?
<of me
>dkfajd
>for reals?
>you would do that?
>you?
<well…not for free
>there’s always a catch
>what do you want?
>my soul?
>a blood debt?
>you can have whatever it is
<I meant you’d have to send me a picture too
<geez stiles
The next text takes an unnervingly long time to come through.
>I could do that
>a photo for a photo
>I kind of look like shit rn
>so no judging me
Derek spends the next two minutes fussing and fidgeting to take a good photo. No matter what angle he took it from the bags under his eyes were noticeable, and so was the week’s worth of stubble he had yet to shave off.
And maybe this was a terrible, awful, idea.
But Derek would send one hundred bad pictures if it meant getting to see one of Stiles.
He forced himself to press send on the last picture he took.
As he pressed send another photo came in.
Derek’s fingers shook as he hit the button to download the image.
His heart stopped.
Stiles was beautiful in every sense of the word, and Derek found himself unable to look away. Even when he heard the small dings of incoming messages.
But he couldn’t ignore them for long, because it was Stiles. And when ever Stiles messaged Derek had to answer.
>Fucking hell
>are you for real?
>you gave me a heart attack
>am I being catfished right now?
>when do you think you were going to tell me you’re the most fucking beautiful man to exist ever?
>how the hell to you look like that as 2AM!?
>Derek
>oh my god
>you gotta respond my dude because I’m freaking out a little bit
>still there?
>did my selfie scare you away?
>I would have tried harder for a nice photo if I knew I was talking to an adonis
>Derek?
<still here
>of thank fuck
>so…
<so?
>come on
>your going to give me a complex
>the selfie…was it okay?
>I know it’s not much
>but we can’t all be greek gods
<its beautiful
<you’re beautiful, stiles
>oh
>thanks
//
Derek is so far gone that he makes the picture of Stiles the home screen on his phone.
//
9:49 AM Bad Poet
<Laura wants me to meet her boyfriend
<this is all your fault
>how is this my fault?
<because she never wanted to introduce us before
<and then you got me to talk to my sister
<and now she wants me to meet him
>…and this is a bad thing?
<yes
>because?
<I don’t make good first impressions
<it’s going to be awkward
>yeah probably
<you’re not helpful
>I wasn’t trying to be ;)
>have fun, Derek!
//
Meeting Laura’s boyfriend wasn’t as awkward as Derek thought it was going to be. But it was strange.
Derek hadn’t been expecting to meet someone so soft and kind. He was nothing like any one that Laura had dated before.
But he also wasn’t used to seeing Laura smile as much as she did around him.
Maybe not all change was bad.
//
Derek tells Laura about Stiles by accident. Or more accurately he mentions Stiles once by accident (not even by name) and Laura had badgered him until he admitted that he had made a friend through a wrong number.
“There’s a lot of weirdos out there.”
“I know.”
God did Derek ever know.
But Stiles is different.
“Just…be careful.”
“I am being. I promise.”
Laura reluctantly lets it go after that. “So…what’s he like?”
“He’s…he’s like bad poetry.”
“Oh god. You’re in love with him aren’t you?”
Derek can’t bring himself to deny it, but he does tell Laura to shut up.
//
Derek fully embraces being in love with Stiles on the day he tells Stiles about his drawings. He’d never told anyone about them before - not even Laura. But telling Stiles had been easy.
‘It reminds me of line art’ Stiles had said when Derek had sent him a photo of the doodle he had been working on. “I love it’.
A warmth flutters through Derek’s veins.
//
It all goes sideways on the day Laura goes on Derek’s phone to check the time.
She’d raised one eyebrow at him looking amused.
“I thought you didn’t listen to music?” She said, a teasing note to her voice.
“I don’t.” Derek shrugged.
“A huh. So why do you have a picture of Stiles Stilinski as your wallpaper?” She asks.
It’s so startling to hear Stiles name coming out of Laura’s mouth that Derek’s brain refuses to function properly. “How do you know Stiles?” He asks weakly.
Laura laughs. “He’s not exactly a niche celebrity Der. He was a really famous YouTuber before he started selling albums.”
Derek doesn’t know what to say to that. He blinks as his world slowly unravels before him.
No.
She had to be wrong, because Derek couldn’t be in love with a celebrity. Stiles couldn’t be…
“Hey are you okay? You look really sick?”
“He’s famous?” His throat is dry.
“Yes? Are you okay? What’s wrong? You’ve got to speak to me Der. Use your words.”
Derek just shakes his head because he can’t.
“It’s him.” He manages to get out.
“What are you talking about?”
“Laura. It’s him.”
It takes a moment to click but Derek knows when it does because a look of thunderous wrath takes over Laura’s face.
“I’ll kill him.” She seethes, shaking with anger. “What kind of fucking punk thinks that this is a good prank to play?”
“What?”
“No one is getting away with catfishing you, Der. I’m going to hunt this fucker down, and then I’ll rip him so many new ones that he going to look like SpongeBob when I’m done with him.”
And god, Derek hadn’t even considered the thought that Stiles might not even be Stiles. The thought of Stiles being a liar…
The gape in his heart grows a little bit bigger.
And it all falls apart.
//
It takes hours before Derek can convince himself to confront Stiles.
11:08 PM Bad Poet
<you’re stiles stilinki
>fuck
(And yeah, it was really him).
>how did you find out?
<Laura
>I was going to tell you
<Were you?
>Yes
>I’ve wanted to for ages
>It just never felt like the right time to bring it up
<I wish you had decided on the right time was sooner
>Me too
>I’m sorry
>Please don’t hate me
Derek did not think it was possible for him to hate any part of Stiles.
<I don’t
>Thank fuck
>seriously
>can I call you?
<sure
Derek closed his eyes after sending the text and waited for Stiles to ring. A heartbeat later his ringtone sounded off.
“Hey.”
“You believe me right?” And Stiles sounds more frantic than Derek had ever heard him before.
“I believe you, Stiles.”
“Are you sure, because I can prove it if you want? I can do a video call? Or I can tweet literally anythi-”
“Stiles.”
“Yeah?”
“You don’t have to prove anything to me.”
Stiles lets out a small whine, that reaches through the phone line and yanks at Derek’s already tattered heart, unraveling him just a little more.
“Meet me.” Stiles said, taking Derek by surprise.
“What?”
“Please. I meant to throw a please in there, I’m just really fucking nervous right now. Meet me please. In real life. I uh- I was going to ask when I finally told you about the whole being a celebrity thing. It’s still weird to say that out loud. That’s part of why it was so hard to tell you. But the point was you beat me to the punch with the whole reveal thing, but I still wanted to ask.”
“Stiles…”
“And it’s not that I was trying to use my influence or fame to pressure you into meeting me. I just wanted to be in a space where we were one hundred per cent honest with one another before I asked you. You can still say no. Of course you can, I don’t know why I’m- my point is I hope you don’t say no.”
Derek feels his heart break in two.
“Stiles…I can’t.”
“Oh.”
He hadn’t fully realised just how many worlds apart the two of them were when he had fallen in love with Stiles. It felt even more impossible than it had before.
“I’m sorry.” The words leave him feeling hollow.
“No. Don’t apologise. This is just me getting carried away. It’s okay.”
I love you. The words never leave Derek. They can’t leave him.
There was no way this could work, and he was far too scared of breaking the tentative connection they had with his useless words.
It was better for him to just… fall out of love.
//
6:17AM Laura
<it’s really him
>are you sure
<I’m sure
>what are you going to do?
<nothing
>Derek you’re in love with him
<I’m aware
<it doesn’t matter
<it wouldn’t ever work
>I’m sorry
<don’t be
<I’m going to be fine
>Im coming over with wine
//
That night Derek fills pages and pages of his notebook with drawings of Stiles.
When he gets a message from Stiles at 11PM- for the first time since they started messaging- Derek leaves it unopened.
//
He never ignores a message again after that, and life moves on. Stiles still messages him all the time, but he never asks to call anymore.
Derek misses his voice so much that he goes onto youtube and listens to his music.
He buys all three albums Stiles released and it still doesn’t feel like enough.
//
He fills an entire notebook with doodles of Stiles.
It’s still not enough.
//
1:11 PM Bad Poet
>I wrote you a song
>I know you don’t listen to music
>but it felt weird to not a least send you a link
>bad poetry at 2:00am
The link leads Derek to a youtube video of Stiles holding a ukulele and staring with a soft smile at the camera.
“Hey guys. It’s been a while, huh? But I guess I finally found inspiration. So here we go.”
The song is beautiful, but even more beautiful than that was Stiles.
When the song reached the end Derek doesn’t hesitate to hit replay.
He listens to the song ten times before he realises he’s crying - and he knows that he’s never going to ‘get over’ Stiles because he doesn’t want to.
//
3:00 PM Laura
>have you seen the video?
<he sent me a link
<he wrote a song for me Laura
<I love him so fucking much and he wrote a song for me
>fuck
<what do I do?
>what do you want to do?
<I don’t know
>I think you should look at his twitter
<?
>I wasn’t going to say anything because you said you wanted to get over him
>but I think you need to see it
>@stilesstilinki
//
@stilesstilinski
I want to hug him
@stilesstilinski
Get you a guy that will stay up with you until 4AM talking about literally anything
@stilesstilinski
Why do I alway fall for people so far out of my league? rip me I guess.
@stilesstilinski
He makes me want to write poetry
Derek spends hours scrolling through Stiles’ twitter.
He scrolls far enough back that he gets to the part of his timeline where his twitter is littered with pictures of Lydia, which causes the ache in Derek’s chest to grow. But he can’t stop looking because Stiles looks so happy.
And Derek falls impossibly more in love.
He lets himself acknowledge for the first time that Stiles might love him back.
And everything else?
It’s worth it.
Because Stiles is worth everything to Derek.
//
2:00 AM Bad Poet
<so I looked at your twitter
>fuck.
>how much did you see?
<all of it
>tight
>please excuse me while I go die now
>bye
<don’t leave yet
<I had something I wanted to ask you
>did you want me to delete the tweets?
>I can do that
>I’ll just delete the whole account
>I am my own worst enemy so this won’t be a problem
>actually Jackson Whittemore is my worst enemy
>but I’m a close second
<stiles?
>yup?
<Will you go on a date with me?
>alkdjf
>yes?
>Ofc yes?
>are you being serious?
>because this would be a cruel prank if you’re not serious
<I’m serious
>yes.
>yes. yes. yes. yes. yes. yes.
>holy shit
>theres no fucking universe where I say ‘no’ to that question from you
>im so fucking in love with you
>is it too soon to say that?
>I don’t even care
>I’m speaking my truth
>you obviously don’t have to say it back
>im going to woo you so hard Derek
>you’ll have to love me back eventually
>I’m going to write you poetry
>hell I’ll even read poetry for you
>ill give the whole fucking moon to you
<why would I want the moon?
<im not gru?
>despicable me
>that was a despicable me reference.
>you don’t listen to music, but you watch despicable me?
>you’re such an enigma to me Derek
>god I love you so much
<stiles?
>too much?
<no
<I don’t think I could ever have too much of you
<I love you too stiles
<so much
<I just don’t want you to get your hopes up
<I might not be able to live up to it in real life
>impossible
<seriously stiles
>I am being serious
>I’m already in love with you Der
>you don’t have to do anything more than you’ve already done
>you could wear a potato sack, and spend the whole night not saying anything at all
>and I would still be in love with you
>all you have to do now is show up
<…I can do that
>perfect
//
TWO YEARS LATER
@stilesstilinski
Hey @JacksonWhittemore, remember when you told me I would die alone? Well I just got engaged to the love of my life. So checkmate fucker.
#sterek#eternal sterek#what am i even doing?#i just spent the last two days writing this and banging my head against the wall and nothing else#should i write this into a full fic one day?#i probably wont#hope you guys enjoy#sterek drabble#5k words of them being idiots#i cut so much out how is this still 5k?#stiles stilinki#derek hale#laura is the only other character that makes an appearance#im supposed to be sleeping#but here we are ig#texting#wrong number#celebrity stiles
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random thoughts related to kagepro (tw for depression?? death?? suicide ?? implied ?? im not sure and idk what else read at ur own risk)
well idk lately ive been thinking a lot and ik ive uh always (? since i can remember?) have been depressed (i mean...it started around age 12...i dont really remember much before that. most of what i remember are bad moments anyways. or very specific scenes. but they dont feel mine. if that makes sense. its like remembering the scene from a movie. back on track i guess idk well lately ive realized i actually kin some characters and lately ive...been relating a lot to shintaro kisaragi fromkagepro. i mean its ok. there´s always been that specific similarity in us (after all, how many characters in anime are as related to coca cola as shintaro //and me,,im literally a coca cola addict lmao// well anyways. after some days, this lead me to thinking...to a hidden memory within my brain, i guess. I remember introducing my then best friends, to kagepro. one told me haha he´s like u bc the coca cola!! and i think i just laughed and smiled? i truly didn´t see it? i was sad sure, but i couldnt really relate to him. after all, i was the leader of my own little group of 12 year old weebs,right? (i was also 12 btw) i didnt personally dislike shintaro but i didnt rly see myself in him yknow? also i have loved ayano from ever since i have memory so idk like she´s one of my biggest comfort characters and its weird bc if she was ´´real´´ idk if i could date her or anything but im just glad she exists bc it somehow comforts me a lot yeah anyways ayano essay for another time lol. anyways at this age my favorite characters in kagepro were ayano and konoha ( i still love them a lot) thing is, at this point in my life i didnt know/wasnt aware i was transgender but i already kinda liked he/him pronouns so i roleplayed a lot. online. i roleplayed as konoha obviously lmao and actually one of my irl friends related to shintaro ?? and i think we may have roleplayed lmao and stuff.... she even had a facebook account named shin hikkikomori or smth like that. anyways fast forward bc after being 12 a lot of stuff happened obviously. and none of that relates to kagepro until quite some time. i will mention some items that dont really relate to kagepro but marked moments in my friend group that may be relevant later on. Around 2016)? Some of my closest friends changed schools (but we kept contact) yet i still had a big group at school. But it got fragmented along the way. 2017 i went to Japan and formed a new, different friend group with people that even today, are dear to me. When i came back, my friend group fragmented more. I kept contact with other members of the old group but one on one, not as a group anymore. 2018 we graduated, and i broke up my realtionship with one of my former best friends (2016-2018) 2019 was a year of change, and even though i was afraid and shit got weird, i was not doing too bad. i will skip that. Well. Im sure we all know 2020 was a trainwreck, shit happened. i had a villain arc. I lost my shit,definetely. Ups, downs, whatever. 2021 has not been too different. However, even through everything, in early 2020, i kept close relationships with my friend group. as the year moved forward and the restrictions started lifting ( thank you government very cool <3 //ironically obviously, this is the reason this shit wont go away//) some of my friends saw each other irl and stuff, or talked about stuff i didn´t understand/didn´t want to hear while on discord. I felt alienated. I felt empty. I got mad at a friend for the first time, for something he said. I ended up isolating myself. A friend celebrated her birthday. She invited me and never excluded me, asked me a lot of things and asked to virtually include me. But that would just make me feel more alienated, wouldn´t it? I told her it was ok, i didn´t go. Honestly, I felt like a bother. I didn´t want to bother. I wasn´t okay, but i didn´t want to bother anyone, so i isolated myself. I had a very bad breakdown. lasted weeks. When I recovered, it wasn´t the same. It felt like everyone else was closer, while i drifted away. I kind of recconected with some of my friends from Japan after this. In the vacations, i felt like i reconnected with some friends just to drift away again later. However, i never could reconnect with one of my best friends. She never really got mad at me or anything ( i think) but we don´t really talk much anymore. We used to talk daily, be it actual talking, memes, anything. I don´t think we´ve actually talked in weeks. There´s nothing I can do. This year, another friend had a birthday, but I was so disconnected from everyone I didn´t even care. I mean. It´s all broken now, isn´t it? The other day I just started wondering. When did I start relating to Shintaro so much? I had always been like this, hadn´t I? Who am I, actually? Why do I relate so much now? It´s not just about the soda. I had lost friends before, but I never really felt like that. Sometimes I feel like I´ve lost everyone. In a one year span I became a hikkikomori. About a month ago, when I entered classes, I was recognized as Shintaro pfp and I admitted to kinning him to people i´d never talked to before (on chat) // I decided to go apeshit idc anymore about what anyone thinks of me// I had fun. I think I must´ve posted on my stories, because two different people told me they were the ene to my shintaro. I appreciated it. i mean it´s kinda true bc now that i´m only on the pc they do bother me online and try to get me to open up or get better but sometimes the just annoy me lmao but also not bc they all have their own particular lives and they all seem to be doing better than me. Still, my classmates are very nice and inclusive. But it´s not like im close to any of them I guess. I´m just alone now. I´m fucked up man....I don´t feel real anymore. I don´t really know who I am. I guess that´s why I find comfort in seeing a part of myself in Shintaro? But when did i turn out like this? Why didn´t I relate when I was younger? Well, I hadn´t really lost any friends back then. I now know how painful that is. How lonely it is to be alone even when there is people around. idk. and i´ve always been quiet. introverted. shy. a loser. yet now whenever i meet anyone i try to idk connect? but i cant. i wish i could be more evil. maybe it´d just be easier if everyone really, truly hated me. maybe i´d get the strength to actually kill myself then. it´s weird. i really see myself in route xx shintaro. I know that´s fucked up because I know how it ends. but truly, i was trying. I was healing, i think i was going somewhere. and i was trying to keep my newly formed renovated friend group together. I really was trying to. I didn´t mind if we had sub groups on the big group, but we were all there for each other. I tried my best. I felt like i belonged. but now im alone again. and this time there´s nothing i can do. if something, i´ve made it worse. and i keep making it worse. it´s weird. when i first got into kagepro, both shintaro and ayano felt like adults. i thought they were really, really big. im older than them now. now i know theyre not really adults. i get it. i still feel 18. after all, these last two years have been taken away from me. i didnt waste them myself this time. i feel like a rotten 18 year old...when i listen to lost time memory, i just...get it. i always liked the song. i thought the story was so cool. when it first came out.. i still remember. iwas there. i waited for it. i loved it. i still do, but back then, i just saw it all as some really great and cool song. now i feel like i really, really get it. i love it even more. im hiding away in all my memories. but what is my true heart? what do i really want? i don´t know, i don´t know... If I'm 'wise' then, I can't face forward; I have no reason to so, I'll rot away instead It would be nice if time could be turned back. Years may pass but I'll never die I repeat hopeful words to myself, even though I know I still won't be able to reach you. "It doesn't matter, just die already!" I said as I clutched my wrist, simply cursing it. Unable to do anything, I merely indulged myself in life. "If summer can show me dreams, then let's go to before you were taken away" The days where I hid my embarrassment are illuminating upon the atmosphere and burning my mind. If I'm wishing for a dream that can't come true, then I'll embrace this blurry past and have a dream which I don't wake up from and naturally seclude myself from the outside world. "But that means you can't even see tomorrow?" I don't really care 'bout that, so it's ok I stained my hands in order to kill these boring days I'm choosing "solitude" after all A rotten boy at 18 today too, prayed again while clinging on to your colored smile Underneath the blazing sun Asking "Somehow, please take me away instead of leaving like this!" and my murmuring breath was quietly stopped
I guess i just wish someone could actually help me. take me out of this hole. Maybe some kind of closure would be nice. It´s not the same, though. I don´t have enough bravery in myself to actually kill myself. Mostly because of guilt. I can´t take the guilt of dissapointing everyone. I don´t want my parents to get hurt. I don´t want my bunny to miss me. Yet i wish everyday for it to be over. Lately, half of my dreams have been in Japan, with many friends, some who i met there, some who have never been there. Yet my brain shows me the dreams before it was all taken away. I think one of my favorite parts of the day is dreaming. I like to sleep simply because I dream. And i sleep very few. mayb bc i hate myself? I still barely indulge in life. I do anything to stay distracted. If i think, it all goes to shit. it all does. like now. Heh. it´s funny. I guess no one is truly my ene, because no one actually knows how mentally fucked up i got these past months. No one knows how badly i´ve been treating myself and how badly i´ve been doing. Still, i can´t tell anyone but scream it into the tumblr void. No one has to keep up with my shit. No one has to take care of me. After all, it was I who chose solitude. It was me who kept them away. But I don´t get a second choice. I don´t get a change of routes if things go sour. And i guess I don´t get to get a mentally fucked up friend group where I belong for a second time. Once was good enough, wasn´t it? I.. Even when I wasnt as deep as i am now (again) into kagepro, ive always wanted to die on August 15. It holds meaning to me now as well. Every year I used to ask people to go out with me that day. I know im not brave enough to kill myself. I always hoped for a lil miracle i guess. Last year was the first year...I didn´t do anything. I just... I just hope this year i can make it. I hope the miracle happens this year....I can only hope......its too late for me to be saved, isn´t it? I never thought it´d be like this. I don´t get closure. I don´t get goodbyes. I am left behind on a world that keeps moving. I am nothing.
#long post#hinatalks#we live in a society#fr fr#when i die....if god is real..i´ll end this once and for all. all of it#i am left with nothing but pain and anger.... i cant even feel anymore. i think i forgot how to
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this is what riverdale is about (part 6)
part 1
part 2
part 3
part 4
part 5
and now...we come to the end of our journey...the final 4 episodes of the season. who killed jason blossom? you forgot that’s what we were doing, huh. you were way too distracted by sex archie and the jughead/betty relationship (called ‘bughead’ in universe).
i have a friend who has been watching riverdale because i have basically tricked him into doing so and frankly, what i am typing here was and is only the surface of this show’s nonsense. as he watched episodes, he reminds me of all the completely bananas shit that this show throws at you literally every second it is on screen and honestly its a relief to know that, as much as i can try to just give you some basic facts, watching the show itself is still a totally different transcendent experience. its really the only show of its kind; shamelessly stupid but unaware of it while openly delighting in all the silliest cliches presented as straight faced as possible. if these write up do anything for you at all, please, please. watch the show. you will be shocked at how much more there is to discover.
images are from the riverdale wiki
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SEASON 1 (PART 4):
the lost weekend: this is the one with a very special guest star in it: molly ringwald as archie’s mom! she and fred (luke perry) have been separated for some amount of time for an unknown reason. yay she’s so cute! i love her. oh uh, also they’re getting a divorce. the papers are going through. archie gets the bad news in the middle of a gaming sesh with jughead.
meanwhile, veronica meets with her dad’s lawyer (whose name is paul sowerberry?? he never shows up again despite his unbelievably silly name) and tells him she’s not giving him a good statement as to her father’s character to help him get a lesser sentence. “fuck you dad!” is the general sentiment before she stomps out to go to school.
oh man there’s a weird aspect of this show that i have neglected to mention. this isn’t something i’ve ever experienced in school so it was totally foreign and weird to me but the students have their own lounge that they mingle and talk in...at...some point during the school day?? jughead’s opening monologue of this episode makes great pains to talk about how every moment of their lives are scheduled from 8am to 3pm but there’s apparently plenty of sittin’ time where they can just laze about this random room talking about crimes they have or are going to commit. a great deal of talking happens in this room when usually you’d have to like, sneak a convo while getting shit out of your locker between classes. i dunno, it’s weird. this is where archie tells veronica about clifford blossom sending her dad to jail so he can jack the land everyone is fighting over.
archie and betty make plans to celebrate jugheads birthday by taking him to the movies, which i feel like is in poor taste given his movie house was just destroyed but whatever. with betty coming along it’ll be just like the three muskateers! betty replies “AcTuAlLy ThErE wErE fOuR mUsKeTeErS” and somehow he doesn’t beat her to death with his bookbag right there and then. betty then doubles down on the bad words flowing out of her mouth and proposes they hold a surprise party for jughead since, according to his dad, he’s never had one. i have no idea what would compel her to think he would want this. even i know he doesn’t want this and i only know him through a tv screen. on top of this she goes out of her way to invite his deadbeat alcoholic dad multiple times. i thought she was supposed to be the smart, observant nancy drew type but like...what the fuck betty. jughead does, in fact, get pretty pissed at archie just for telling his girlfriend that he even has a birthday. presumably instead of telling him he emerged fully formed from the leader of the black parade’s forehead.
after finding out from some files that her dad was receiving money monthly from clifford blossom for some unspecified reason before the arrest, veronica challenges cheryl to a dance off and wins. unfortunately, veronica cant come forward with what she knows because it would make it look like her dad put a hit out on jason in retaliation. dance off to relieve the pain.
jughead fucking hates his party and makes sure everyone knows it. this is something NORMAL people do and he is NOT normal!!! he leaves the party in a huff when cheryl shows up to get her dance off revenge by ruining the party by inviting the whole school. this is the episode where he does his famous “im a weirdo, i have a hat” speech, which is deliciously dumb. they get in a fight, while jughead’s dad talks to kevin’s boyfriend (who you will remember is a member of his gang he assigned to keep tabs on the progress of the teens looking into the whole land plot mess) while betty’s mom secretly listens in?!
cheryl activates chaos mode and locks everyone in the house so they can play a game called “secrets and sins” which is really just an excuse for her to ask everyone horrible questions to make them feel bad. veronica accuses cheryl of fucking her brother, dilton doiley tells everyone about grundy’s statutory rape of archie andrews and chuck tells everyone about dark mode betty drugging him for an impromptu bdsm session which causes jughead to go apeshit and try to throw a weak little baby punch. jughead’s dad, as the only adult who for some reason let all this happen, finally throws everyone out and tells them to go home.
archie and veronica sleep together, by which i mean, next to each other in the same room. veronica testifies on her father’s behalf and discloses to betty the link between jugheads dad and the serpents and her dad’s land plot dreams. molly ringwald appears for 20 seconds.
INHALES. OKAY.
to riverdale and back again: its homecoming babey! archie’s very supportive mother has a nice talk with him. :) veronica founds out that her dad only has to serve “a few more months” in prison for his various white collar crimes, further proof that riverdale takes place in america. jughead and his dad have a nice normal breakfast while fp sweats and asks him “hey uh, how come uh you’re writing about the uhhhh murder and investigating it and stuff” like a normal dad would. archie and veronica tentatively agree to start going out.
penelopy blossom brings polly (betty’s pregnant sister, remember her? i didn’t) a strawberry milkshake in the most ominous way possible. veronica plans to sneakily find out if jughead’s dad is helping her own and for what purpose, ultimately. jughead accepts and invite to betty’s house for dinner, not knowing her mom is going to grill the shit out of him and his dad over the whole kid murder thing.
polly finds the ring jason proposed to her with back in penelope’s room while snooping, and has no idea how it wound up back in the hands of his mother. according to penelope, jason threw it in their face when he renounced his lineage, then gives her another milkshake.
the cooper family event is disrupted when betty, wise to her mother’s horseshit, invites her estranged dad to dinner too. all hell breaks loose when the subject of homecoming comes up and fp reveals that while alice and hal were crowned homecoming king and queen, they got in a knockout, drag-out fight backstage. alice flips out before he can reveal what it was about and betty and jughead flee for the dance. meanwhile archie and veronica try, and fail, to find something incriminating in fp’s trailer.
cheryl discovers the milkshakes are DRUGGED and polly is going to sleep through homecoming. she informs her parents that she has disposed of the ring (evidence) and they dont have to worry about it anymore. you can see where this is going.
jughead’s dad drops a bomb on him right before homecoming that they’re going to move to toledo to meet up with jughead’s mom and baby sister. jughead hates this bc he just got used to betty and he wants to write his murder book.
archie and veronica sing a truly terrible cover of “kids in america” that has to be seen to be believed.
youtube
meanwhile, sherrif keller tears up fp’s house with a search warrant and finds the gun that was used to kill jason blossom. WHAAAA??? BUT ARCHIE AND VERONICA JUST SEARCHED IT??? how could this happen.....jughead finds out about the web of deception weaved by the friends and tells them all to fuck off so he can go to toledo with his family. jughead literally turns around and is informed that his dad was just arrested for murder. his life is so hilariously bad.
the sheriff sucks so bad at his job because he tells his gay son everything who then spills the beans to archie and co (sans jughead) who learn that fp is being framed, because they already tossed the place before.
cheryl has the ring. at this point none of these things mean anything.
i cant believe i still have two more of these. i’m going to have to split this post after this one.
anatomy of a murder: as it turns out, archie discovers, information you discover during a breaking and entering won’t hold up in court. oops. meanwhile fp inexplicably confesses to kidnapping jason after his fake drowning at sweetwater river so he could use him as ransom after discovering he heir to all that sweet maple syrup money. according to fp, jason nearly escaped so they cut their losses and blasted a hole in him. he also confesses to torching the car and stealing the sheriff's files (which we, the audience, know hal cooper did, not fp). well. that’s that, i guess.
betty’s dad comes back to the family home to destroy the murderboard evidence all like “whoo hoo! fp took a bullet for me!” hal’s concern and his reason for stealing the files in the first place, as it turns out, was because the feud between the coopers and the blossoms is more complicated than we thought. the coopers WERE blossoms, until grand-pappy was murdered, so they packed their shit and left with a new name. so that makes polly and jason related. cool!
fp apparently used his his last phone call to call kevin’s boyfriend who, after some pressing by the gang, admits that while he didnt see fp pull the trigger, he did help him put jason’s body in a freezer. this tip leads them to the corpse of a serpent who had a sack of money in a monogrammed dufflebag with the initials “h.l.” (hiram lodge). this is a comically dumb move for a crime boss to make. it is shockingly stupid.
joaquin tells kevin about a secret stash he and fp set up before he bounces from town forever because riverdale sucks. in the stash is jason’s jacket. everyone puzzles over what it means until betty, noted brain genius checks the pockets. in it they find a usb drive.
they sit down and watch the usb and react like they’re watching a sad documentary and not a snuff film. betty calls CHERYL OF ALL PEOPLE and tells her what they just saw on the usb. cheryl, queen of chaos, confronts her dad and tells him that everyone knows what he did.
it turns out the video depicts jason tied up in the basement of the whyte wyrm, there the dead serpent watches over him. clifford blossom walks in and blows a hole in his kid. fp confessed to protect jughead, who was threatened by cliff as the heat poured on.
clifford dies surrounded by his greatest love, maple syrup, by hanging himself in the syrup barn. lol
the sweet hereafter: how the fuck is there another episode of this? they solved the murder, what else could there possibly be to do. wtf. anyway.
the cops find hella drugs in the maple barn after clifford’s death. the assumed story is that jason learned about his dad’s heroin smuggling business and threatened to tell the cops on his dad which lead to his abduction, and eventual death. i guess the polly thing is in here too somehow. not important i guess. the lodges prepare for hiram’s arrival. betty and archie are going to be honored by the mayor for cracking the case at the 75th annual jubilee (wtf). hermoine attempts to buy fred out of the project now that the cops are cracking down on the serpents and making them the face of the construction company is now a very bad look.
betty tries to write an article for the town paper about fp being innocent but her parents wont publish it, citing it as a conflict of interest given she’s smooching the subject’s son. jughead FINALLY JUT NOW gets a social worker who realizes that fred has a dui and is not fit to care for a kid. he has to transfer to a new school district...SOUTHSIDE HIGH SCHOOL!!!
cheryl apologizes for throwing hands at jughead in a previous ep and gives him her iconic spider brooch. i am only bringing this up because she says, specifically, that selling it will net him a good amount of hamburgers and “s t-shirts” for years. why is she the only one who notices he only wears one kind of shirt. betty’s article getting published in the school paper leads to the above retaliation.
veronica’s mom honest to god asks her to sexually manipulate archie into convincing his dad to sell the project to her.
betty’s mom, after a confrontation, tells betty abt the fight she and her dad had on homecoming night when they were high schoolers. turns out...alice was pregnant. she gave the baby up for adoption after she went to the sisters of quiet mercy, like she did with polly, even though hal wanted an abortion. betty immediately tells all her friends this shit.
jughead transfers to the new high and flourishes. turns out they’re all baby gangsters there so they look at him and his dad as kings to be admired. when the archie group heads off to go rescue him, it turns out they dont need to do anything. but now that theyre all conveniently together, veronica gets a txt from cheryl saying she’s going to go be with jason....
they rush to the river where cheryl is having her ophelia meltdown in his stupid little river boat dress where she punches through the ice until she falls through. theres no way to describe how silly this scene is unless you see it so i won’t try but its so melodramatic and cheesy that youre going to be amazed that it got through the writing team at all. archie saves her by punching through the ice the other way. from under the ice. you will soon find, that all of archie’s solutions are to punch things.
betty does a speech at the jubilee that convinces fred not to sell. a nice ending for him.
meanwhile cheryl burns her fucking house down for a lark. just for the drama of it all.
the same night, jughead and betty start to fuck, as do veronica and archie. not int he same room, like totally separately. but jughead is interrupted by the serpents and a dog named hotdog, who give him a jacket of his own so he can join the team. betty is scandalized.
archie goes to meet his father for a breakfast at pop’s chocklit shoppe for a serious talk. but while he’s int he bathroom, a man with a gun is holding up the chocklit shoppe. he demands fred’s wallet, then pops a hole in him and runs off.
and that.........is where this season......ends.
---
thank you for joining me for season 1 of this shitshow. i love this shitty show. if you loved reading about it, or were mortified by whatever the fuck happened here, then you should watch it as well.
i never pass up an opportunity to shill myself, so if you like what i write, drop me a buck or two at my patreon. i do more writing like this, but also i mostly make comics, so make sure to read the page when you’re signing up so you know what you’re getting!
i WILL return...with season...2!
https://www.patreon.com/aghoststory
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This Week in Gundam Wing 4-10 August 2019
Here’s this week’s roundup!
Remember to give your content creators some love! And join in on the events at the bottom!
~Mod Hel (I almost completely forgot I needed to do this!)
Fanfiction/Snippets/AU Ideas:
Amberly
Knife in Hand (Ch. 29-30) https://archiveofourown.org/works/6068848/chapters/47722984
Trowa Barton/Duo Maxwell
Trowa Barton, Duo Maxwell, Heero Yuy, Zechs Merquise, Chang Wufei, Relena Peacecraft, Quatre Raberba Winner, Dorothy Catalonia, Howard (Gundam Wing), Original Characters
Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Consent Issues, Organized Crime, Assassination, child trafficking, Past Abuse, Federal Agents, Abuse of Power, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Gender Issues
Part 1 of the The Broker's Porch series
Have a recap of the previous conversation, future planning, and some shameless, shameless smut. Duo is exploring his sexuality, and whoooo boy is it hot. It’s an important milestone, not only for Duo, but for the relationship he has with Trowa.
@bobo-is-tha-bomb
The Circus https://archiveofourown.org/works/20139331
Trowa Barton/Dorothy Catalonia
Trowa Barton, Dorothy Catalonia, Catherine Bloom, Quatre Raberba Winner
Romance, One-Shot, citrus, Mild Adult Situations
Dorothy always enjoyed watching decent men stumble over their own feet after she had given them a small smile, only to reject them the next instant. But Trowa wouldn't stumble over his own feet. Oh no… he would devour her instead.
The Bodyguard (Ch. 6-12) https://archiveofourown.org/works/19924237/chapters/47378779
Heero Yuy/Reader
Heero Yuy, Reader, Relena Peacecraft
Romance, Drama, Violence, Mild Sexual Content
When death threats start to get serious, Preventer sends an Agent to protect you. But this man might be more dangerous to you than any death threat.
@disturbed02girl
https://terrablaze514.tumblr.com/post/186819332852/i-am-so-amused-with-this-photo-i-think-wu-is
Not only is this an angsty, psychological ficlet starring Heero and Wufei, but it's part of a fun thread by @disturbed02girl. A fill in the blanks game.
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186817425709/i-am-so-amused-with-this-photo-i-think-wu-is
https://helmistress.tumblr.com/post/186820295309/i-am-so-amused-with-this-photo-i-think-wu-is
@janaverse
Where are we now https://janaverse.tumblr.com/post/186844816033/where-are-we-now
written for this prompt: “I saw you staring at each other, I just wasn’t sure if it was sexual tension or murderous rage.”
summary: duo is finally back, but things are far from okay and trowa is invested
pairings: friendships all around and hints of future 1+2+1 / 1X2X1… once we make it past the angst
warnings: some angst
note: this was supposed to be light and fluffy, but it took a completely different direction - much to my surprise. I will most definitely be writing more in this universe; some in the future and some in the past. for now, I think it stands fine on its own.
ShenLong1
Bound, Bonded and Betrayed (Ch. 81) https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9726683/81/Bound-Bonded-and-Betrayed
Heero is the eldest son of the King of Colonia. His 21st birthday is approaching and as tradition dictates his betrothed is soon to arrive. However he is also bound by tradition to select his own personal slave. The events that unfold lead him down a path that not only tests his sanity but his humanity and love as well.
Rated: Fiction M - English - Drama/Romance - Heero Y., Duo M.
@terrablaze514
Freedom Fighters Snippet Saturday https://terrablaze514.tumblr.com/post/186921274347/disclaimer-i-dont-own-these-characters-rated
Yep! It's a sneak peek into the "Freedom Fighters" AU series. Can't wait to get ahead with it! Rated T for implied loss of parents, more warnings in later chapters. Basically, Quatre wants his friends to move in with him. If only that was easy.
Fanart/Gunpla/Photo Manips:
@christianmswanson
https://christianmswanson.tumblr.com/post/185648891959/his-gundam-was-a-learning-process-i-learned-how
XXXG-OIH Heavyarms, model (gunpla)
@duointherain
https://duointherain.tumblr.com/post/186836294119
Duo Maxwell
@gundayum
https://gundayum.tumblr.com/post/186850063166/here-have-some-doodles-first-one-is-duos
Duo and his Daughter, Heero
@okamidensetsu
https://okamidensetsu.tumblr.com/post/186891399650/some-things-i-got-from-a-few-months-ago-time-to
Some gunpla of Wing Zero’s in there. >_>
@sweetloots
https://sweetloots.tumblr.com/post/186793430817/this-month-on-patreon-im-revisiting-a-sketch-i
Relena and a puppers!
Photosets/Gifsets/Screenshots/Manga Pages:
@disturbed02girl
https://disturbed02girl.tumblr.com/post/186874179510/pilot-introductions-wufei-and-duo
Character Introductions: WuFei & Duo
Head Canons:
@robo-rad
https://robo-rad.tumblr.com/post/186865591018/preventer-agent-agent-barton-is-so-cool-i-saw
A series of Preventer Duoisms.
@incorrectgundamwingquotes, @gwkimmy
Fandom Discourse:
@terrablaze514
https://terrablaze514.tumblr.com/post/186773533917/on-discord-theres-debate-that-the-fashion
Fashion Week discussion. Basically, pinpointing whether or not the Gundam characters like what they're wearing, and how they feel being snapped by paparazzi without warning. This is Part 1.
Crunchyroll Article
How Gundam Wing Became a Global Phenomenon https://www.crunchyroll.com/anime-feature/2019/08/05/how-gundam-wing-became-a-global-phenomenon
Quotes:
@incorrectgundamwingquotes
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186873974593/during-mariemaias-rebellion-wufei-sometimes
WuFei & Trowa
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186878412080/heero-whats-your-status-duo-fucked-up-about
Heero & Duo
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186854850841/sally-this-says-your-blood-pressure-is-420-over
Sally & Duo
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186861150121/duo-you-actually-care-about-me-wufei-of-course
Duo & WuFei
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186869112188/duo-how-the-fuck-do-people-stay-motivated-their
Duo & WuFei
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186888819849/quatre-heero-youre-losing-a-lot-of-blood
Quatre & Heero
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186901236058/duo-yall-ever-just-hear-something-that-like
Duo & Trowa
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186915471846/duo-what-language-do-they-speak-at-the-center-of
Duo, WuFei, & Quatre
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186783634408/on-a-preventers-mission-duo-we-need-to-get
Duo & Zechs
https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/186782819334/heero-is-that-really-yesessary-quatre-in-a
Heero, Quatre, & Duo
Calendar Events:
@gundamzine
Rhythm Generation: Shooting Stars, Celebrating 25 Years of Gundam Wing
Meet the Mods https://gundamzine.tumblr.com/post/186886285283/head-mod-lifeaftermeteor-brittany-has-been-a
Zine Content https://gundamzine.tumblr.com/post/186791784139/rhythm-generation-shooting-stars-is-an-unofficial
@gundam-wing-bingo
Gundam Wingo is a go!
Come and sign up for a card here: https://gundam-wing-bingo.tumblr.com/post/185466400076/gundam-wing-bingo
@gwcocktailfriday
Cocktail Fridays!
Post responses on Friday, during Happy Hour between 3 & 5 pm in your own timezone.
Here’s the prompt for Friday, August 16th! https://gwcocktailfriday.tumblr.com/post/186909330458/cocktail-friday-post-responses-on-friday-august
For those going to Pillowfort, find us here.
If anyone has ideas for prompts, PLEASE send them in! Our ask box is always open.
In need of Fall and Winter prompts!
@thisweekingundamevents
Gundam Wing Unorthodox Undercover Work Mini Bang
Mine Bang Timeline https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/186718109915/unorthodox-undercover-mini-bang
Writer/Beta Reader Teams have been set! https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/186758249465/gwuuwmb-writerbeta-teams (Please, if there is a problem, get back to me before the 17th!)
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Opening Number, Part 5
Prompt: This is the story of the band that skyrocketed beside Queen and how their singer was fated to be with one of them.
Warning: Cussing and implied smut
If you want to catch up with previous parts they’re linked on my Masterlist in my bio
January 1, 1971
If it weren’t for the enticing smell of food I don’t think I would’ve considered leaving my bed. Sitting up I could feel my head pounding. I grimsed and closed my eyes. I refused to move for a few seconds. I could feel the intense pounding in the back of my head, it me a few deep breaths to find some relief but i knew that wasn't going to last. So I tried to redirect my attention to recalling what happened last night.
I took some shots, danced with Fred, and then I made out with someone. I couldn't seem to remember who it was but I remember how their hands felt as they roamed my body. I remember their lips exploring just as much as their hands did. I remember the smell of alcohol in their breath and how intoxicating their scent was. I sighed and opened my eyes. The noise in the kitchen hadn't stopped but I was too nervous to see who was causing it.
Who do i want it to be?
As I pushed myself off my mattress, I was met with nothing but cold air. I pulled the comforter off the bed and wrapped myself with it. As I'm tried taking the first few steps away from the bed frame I began to limp. Sore could barely describe how my legs felt. As I try to move further the blanket gets caught on something, not caring enough to find out I decide to yank it. I heard something fall but it didn't sound broken so I continued to make my way towards the mysterious figure in my home. The closer I got the more anxious I became. I could feel my heart begin to race. As it sped up more and more, it was all I could hear. I was about to turn into the kitchen when they stepped out.
I froze and forced myself to make eye contact with the them.
“...Noah?”
“I was wondering when you would get out of bed.” My stomach dropped. I don't think i slept with him, right? Not that he's not attractive, but he's my best friend. “Are you okay? You left really early last night, I mean I don't think you got any sleep going from the bags under your eyes.” I don't want to look at him because I felt beyond embarrassed but I need to know what happened last night.
“Wait so we didn't..?” He was silent for a few seconds before beginning to laugh, “Wow you must have been fucked up if you really thought that we would ever do anything.I mean no offense-” Before he could finish I punch his shoulder. “Shut up!” I feel my face growing warmer but I was relieved that he wasn’t the open who I had slept with.
“What the hell are you doing here anyway?” He walks towards the dining room but I don't make any move to follow him. “Cmon, at least take a look to see what I did.” Rolling my eyes I begin to make my way over while trying to hide the extremely obvious limp with the comforter. I'm sure he noticed after he snorted but he didn't say anything.
“Ta-da! I made you a birthday breakfast!” Seeing the table setup my eyes begin to water. He had made all my favorite foods and there were even a few gifts in the corner of my room. I looked at him and he had the biggest proudest smile plastered on his face. He was admiring his work but his smile disappeared when he saw that I began to cry.
“What happened? Did I do something wrong? I mean I know it's just me but I remember you told me not to tell anyone else and that you usually celebrate alone. I just thought you would like this.” I laughed at his rambling and wiped the tears away.
“It’s fine Noah, It's actually perfect, I just haven't really had a party or anything since my parents passed away. I- um Thank you..” His demeanor changed, and instead of getting a look of pity, he smiles and gives me a hug. “Why don't you go clean up and get dressed so we could eat and you could open your gifts okay?” I nod and go back to my room.
Walking back towards my room I see a puddle, I guess when the blanket got stuck I had knock over a glass of water resting on my nightstand. Bending down to pick up the glass I find a piece of paper under my bed.
Sorry I couldn't stay love. Let me make it up to you. I’ll pick you up tonight around 9. -hbsdcbaib I reread the paper a few times, then I just stared at the smug as I tried to decipher whose name was written.
I want to scream. I feel nothing but anger towards myself. If I hadn't spilled that water on the note than I would have known exactly who the I slept with last night. Instead my lover is faceless.
There was nothing I could do but wait. I grab some clothes and head towards the bathroom. Before I entered, I let the blanket fall than close the door. I standing in front of the mirror I take in every detail. My eyes look much worse than to what Noah had led me to believe. Then there was my neck and chest. I was covered in bite marks and hickies. When I turned to step into the bath tub I could feel some tenderness in my hips. Looking down I see bruises, resembling someone's hands. When looking at my legs, I’m met with two more hickies.
Ignoring the achiness I take a hot shower. As I'm standing there I think back to last night. I remember the passion and roughness that my counterpart used. When he had me against the wall or when his head was between my legs. He was confident with very move. He worshiped my body. Together we fit like puzzle pieces. I could feel the heat between my legs begin to intensify. I push it away and finish my shower. After I'm dressed I look into the mirror. I know Noah has seen most the marks on my neck but I still had the urge to cover them. I grabbed some makeup and covered most of them. The others were too dark to hide so I grabbed a turtle neck from my closest and changed. Satisfied with eth look I walked back toward the dining room.
“Finally, do you know how hard it was to have all this food but not to be able to eat any of it.” I laugh and sit down across from him. I don't say anything as I grab a fork and stab the food in the plate. None of it ever makes it into my mouth a dn instead just gets moved around. I could feel Noah's concerned gaze on me but neither of say anything. He comes around the table and bends down to my height.
“Did something happen? If something did you don't have to tell me, but just know that I'm here for you. And if it was one of the guys, I swear I'll kill them.” I smile and roll my eyes. “No you won't, you'll have Em do it.” He laughs but he still looks worried. I sighed, i think back to last night. “I was um, um I was almost attacked last night.” I can't bring myself to look up at him, I was embarrassed, blaming myself for what could’ve happen.
“Who?” I look at him and i'm surprised by how intense his gaze his. A few tears slip out, my anxiety and stress had finally taken hold of the wheel. “Don’t worry about it, Im fine, it was nothing. Its what happened after. Roger saved me. Then Brian and John comforted me. Then i slept with someone and I don't even know how. They left a fucking note that I ruined so now I have no idea who it was from. I’m confused and I don't know what to do and my head hurts and -” I couldn't finish my sentence because I began to cry. Well I was actually sobbing. This only increased the pain I was feeling and it made me feel weak and powerless.
Noah holds me and doesn't say anything. He pulls away when I had started to calm down. “Its okay, it's going to be okay. Let's figure this out. You should eat, I'm going to call the gang and Freddie.”
After sitting there for a minute or two began to eat. I don't have much of an appetite but I forced myself to eat and drink a glass of water. When Noah came back he cleaned up and began to hide the gifts. I silently thanked him for still considering how I felt about my birthday. Just as we had finished cleaning up there was a knock at the door. It must have been Fred because everyone else had a key.
I walked towards the order. I was happy when I noticed that i could walk normally despite the ache. When I opened the door the first thing Freddie did was gasp. “Oh you poor thing! Come here love.” Freddie pulled me into a hug. I guess the crying made my makeup run and that's why he gasped. He didn’t say anything. All he did was shush me an rub my back. It was actually really comforting. When I pulled away freddie began to fix my hair. I smiled softly before taking his hand off my hair. I led him inside. “Thanks for coming Freddie, I'm sorry if you were busy, we shouldn't have called.” I didn't want to be another and I wasn't feeling my best. Frankly I didn't have the energy to be my usually bubbly self. “Nonsense darling, I'll always be here for you.” He rubs my shoulder and gives me the biggest smile.
“Alright love, since we dont know whos coming to pick you up, let's get you dolled up.”
“Lets get her comfortable first, Y/n, we know youre probably aren't feeling up to anything right now so here's what we're gonna do. You're going to take some pain medication, take a nap then we'll get you ready okay.” Emily had let herself in and was beginning to take charge. Usually Fred and her would annoy each other but after their silent communication Freddie turned to me and smiled. “She's right love, get some rest.” I looked between the too and nodded. Once I was in my room I began to run last night over and over again. I felt stupid, I got drunk last night for a reason, now I'll have to live with the haunting my actions for the rest of my life.
“Hey y/n, Em told me to give this to you.” Charlie handed me the medicine and sat at the foot of my bed. “I know how you are. I know you're blaming yourself right now but I also know that it's not. You're okay. We're here for you.” I took the pills and nodded. “Thank you.”
In the next few hours while I slept, my house guests cleaned and prepared everything for me. They had set aside an outfit they knew I would like and they spoke about how they would help me feel better.
When I woke up my headache was alleviated and I felt more nervous than ever. I stood up to find an outfit set hanging on my closet door. I put it on and reapplied my make-up. When i walked out of my bedroom I found the gang in my living room playing scrabble.
“Y/n you're up!” I walk to them and Noah gets up and offers me his spot. He then walks away. I turn to the others looking for soe response as to what they're doing.
“It's your turn.” When i look u at them, i realize they are speaking to me. I make a calculated move. Noah comes back with some tea. They don't bring up anything from yesterday and instead play a friendly game of scrabble. Their passive actions put me at ease. I became so focused on the game I forgot about yesterday. It was what Emilly planed. They distracted me, they took my focus away from all the bad and gave me a moment of peace.
Before I knew it, t was 8:50. “Alright y/n, your dates gonna get be here but were going to be in the bedroom. They’ll be here soon. I know you're going to be nervous, but if you ever feel uncomfortable, just know we're here for you.” “Yes darling, and if any of the boys do anything, then ill kick their arses. You know I was pretty good boxer.” I smile and nod. “Thank you, I mean in.” I pull Em and Fred into hug. Charlie and Noah don't hesitate to join. I watch as they walk into the bedroom and close the door. I take deep breaths but I could feel myself getting nervous all over again. I'll admit it's not as bad as before but I was still really anxious. I was spacing in the living room while trying to relax.
I jumped when I heard a knock at the door. I was frozen and I stopped breathing for a second. When they knocked again I let out my the breath I was holding in. I moved cautiously towards the door. I unlocked the door and put my hand on the doorknob. Here goes nothing.
Tag list: @smile-nine @phantom-fangirl-stuff @fantasticchaoticwho @cosmicsskies @triggeredpossum
Let me know if you would like to be added to the tag list
#queen#freddie mercury#roger taylor#john deacon#brian may#bohemian rhapsody#bohemian rhapsody cast#ben hardy#rami malek#joe mazzello#gwilym lee#john deacon x reader#joe mazzello! john deacon x reader#gwilym lee! brian may x reader#brian may x reader#ben hardy! roger taylor x reader#roger taylor x reader#queen x reader#queen fic
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I’m Park Jimin, I’m Human Too (Jimin x You ONESHOT)
A/N: I have written something similar along the lines of fans hating the girl, if you are familiar with my other story, As Long As You Love Me (Park Jimin) :)
And Im sorry if I made this story weird. hope you like it!I
MASTERLIST
And yeah, happy birthday Park Mochi!
"Hey C-Chim..."
"Yeah baby? Whats wrong?" Jimin looks up from his phone and straighten himself up from the couch, lovingly looking at the love of his life. There are no words to describe how in love Jimin is with her. She is everything Jimin could ever want, could ever wish for. She is perfect for him in every way.
"Uh.. do you remember a few weeks back.. when you just got back from tour..." Y/N asked nervously.
"Yeah?"
"A-And what we did the moment we get back from the airport?"
"Absolutely," Jimin winks. "I think that is one of the best yet baby. But what about it? You want a repeat of that?" He smirks.
"Uh..." Y/N blushes. "Remember how we cant control it anymore and we still continue even though we ran out of condoms?"
"O...kay?" Jimin finally get a feeling of where this conversation is going.
"Jimin... I'm uh," she finally showed him the stick that shes been hiding behind her back. "I'm pregnant,"
Jimin took the pregnancy test with shaky hands. True enough, two blue lines, indicating that its positive, that his girl is carrying his baby right now. That theres a mini Jimin in the making.
"A-And before you ask, thats like the 15th test I took... and its all positive. Jimin, I'm sorry!" Y/N's voice shakes, tears are already pooling at the corner of her eyes at his quiet respond. She knew he is not going to take this news easy. There is no way Jimin is gling to be happy about it. An idol with a pregnant girlfriend? Their relationship is not even public! Jimin looks up from the pregnancy test that he is holding and looks at her, confused with her reaction. Upon realizing that Y/N is crying, he quickly steps forward and reached out for her hands.
"Baby? Why are you crying? What are you saying sorry for?" Jimin is freaking out. Whats wrong? Is she hurt? Is the baby already hurting her?
"I'm-I'm pregnant Chim! I have ruined your life!" She wailed out. "How can you ask me whats wrong? Everything is wrong!"
"What?!" Jimin burst into laughter. Y/N immediately stops crying, looking at her boyfriend who is laughing so hard his eyes turnes to slits, with big wide confused eyes. "Baby, why would you being pregnant ruined my life?"
"Y-You are an idol! You are barely home! You dont have time for a baby! You cant even date! People dont even know we are dating!" She listed out all the reasons why Jimin should be running out the door right now, but Jimin just holds her hand tight and smiles at her.
"If thats the case, maybe we can finally let our relationship be public now?" Jimin grins at her. "Its not like I'm under a dating ban. I'm just keeping it public to keep you safe,"
"W-What?"
"Lets make our relationship public baby. I want to introduce my beautiful girlfriend, the love of my life and my future baby that she is carrying to the world," his smile turned wider.
"C-Chim... why arent you angry? Or mad? Or breaking up with me?"
"Huh?" He tilted his head, confused. "Why would I? Baby..." he lifted her chin so she would look at him in the eye. "I love you. I love you very very much. Having you as my girlfriend is a miracle enough, but having a baby with you? A little person who is half me and half you? Baby, that is just amazing! Marvelous! I-I dont know how to describe it but no one can ever be happier than what I'm feeling right now. So no, I wont get mad, angry and definitely not breaking up with you,"
"R-Really?"
"Absolutely," Jimin grins and leans in to kiss her. "I love you so much Y/N, but sorry, you are going to share my love with this little mochi now," he stroke her tummy, although theres no visible sign of a bump yet. "I'm going to be the best father to my mochi baby, and the best boyfriend, maybe future husband?" He winks, "to you. That's promise,"
/////
"You are really sure Jimin? You really want to do this?" Seven pair of eyes looks, no, stares at him. His beloved members and the PD of course. His relationship with Y/N, although it has been years since they were together, were safely kept from the public. Sometimes he himself wonder how they managed to do it, but everyday he thanks the stars to have a girlfriend that is so understanding. He can never take her out on proper dates and she has to share him with his extremely busy schedule. He only gets to see her a few times a month when they are not on a break and Jimin really wonders why Y/N still wants to be with him. Someone so perfect, wanting him. And now shes carrying his child, and Jimin has never been so sure that he wants the world to know. Its time for him to treat Y/N the way she deserve to be treated. And he is sure his fans would understand. He is human too afterall, he falls in love too, and they should be happy that he found someone if they really love him.
"Yeah. I think I'm ready," he smiles. "And I think the fans would be alright with it when they see how happy I am with Y/N. I'm going to be a father guys!" He jumps excitedly. The younger boys went and hugs him, jumping along in excitement.
"Jimin, I dont mean to burst your bubbles, but once you do this, there is no turning nack. Are you really sure?" Namjoon turns him around and asks, his brows furrowing in worry.
"Yeah hyung. Y/N is the one for me. I'm already thinking about proposing to her... so yes. I want to do this. I know and and I'm sure our ARMYs will be supportive," Jimin smile and patted the leader's back. "Dont worry about us hyung. We will be okay. All of us will,"
"Well then Chim," Namjoon smile. "If thats the case, then I am very happy for you and Y/N," Namjoon went over and hug the younger man.
"And we will do the preparation for the official announcement. Whatever happens, we hope you and Y/N will be able to get through it. Congratulations Jimin," the PD smile and went out from the meeting room. The BTS dorm was filled with celebration that night. A congratulatory celebration for Jimin who had found his true love and finally have a little Bangtan in the making.
/////
It hasnt even been an hour after the official news is released that BTS' Park Jimin has a girlfriend and is expecting a baby with her, with a high possibility of a marriage on the way and the news has made it into all the headlines. Although many are happy about the news, congratulating him and complimenting on how beautiful Y/N is and how they are made for each other, there are more who hated the news and immediately despise Y/N for stealing Jimin from them.
It hasnt even been an hour, but the hate comments on Y/N has hits millions. Worse, she actually accidentally read them.
"Jimin wake up right now!" Hoseok shakes his shoulder,waking him up from his deep slumber.
"Hmm yeah what is it hyung? We dont have a schedule today. Cant you let me sleep? Please?" Jimin rubbed his eyes sleepily, yawning.
"I think you need to go to Y/N. Right now Chim," Hoseok urges him, still shaking him so he wakes up.
At the mention of Y/N's name, Jimin's eyes immediately popped open wide.
"Why? Whats wrong? Did something happened to her?" He panics and reached out for his phone, which has no notification from her. "She didnt call or text me though?"
"This Chim. This happen. And I dont think Y/N is okay right now," Hoseok placed his phone in front of the sleepy Jimin to show all the hate comments coming in non stop.
How did she even get Jimin? Shes a troll!
Break up right now! Jimin dont like you!
What did you do to take our Jimin? You must have blackmailed him!
Thast not Jimin's baby! Shes a slut!
Theres no way our Jimin makes you pregnant. Slut slut!
This Y/N is obviously a whore!
"What?!" Jimin was mortified. How could his fans be so crude? So evil? How could they even thought about all these words to describe his girl? The love of his life. And those are just a few. There are thousands more meaner comment from wbere that come from.
"D-Did Y/N read this?" He looks up with shaky eyes to Hoseok.
"We dont know Chim but even if she didnt I think its best that you go to her now," Hoseok looks at him with worried eyes, his brows furrowed. "She needs you there with her, wheter she has read it or not,"
Jimin has never run out from the dorm as fast as he did that day, panting as he burst open the door to Y/N's apartment, only to find her sitting on the couch, face drenched with tears, hands holding her phone tightly, looking back at him with wide, scared eyes. Never has his heart hurt as much as it did that day, seeing the love of his life in pain and hurting, all because of something that is important to him.
"Y/N, baby," he rushed to her at once, engulfing her in a tight hug, stroking her hair as her tears wet the front part of his shirt. "I'm sorry baby. I'm sorry. I'm really really sorry baby. None of what they said is true. Dont you ever believe it. None of it baby,"
Y/N grasp the front of his shirt tightly, not saying anything, just letting her tears falling rapidly down her face. After a while of just crying and sobbing her heart out, letting out every sadness shes feeling, the most heart breaking sound Jimin has ever heard, Y/N finally composed herself and find the courage to look at Jimin in the eyes.
"I-I'm sorry Chim," she sobbed. Jimin tuck a piece of her hair, now wet with her tears, behind her ear.
"Baby you dont need to be sorry. What are you even apologizing for? Its all my fault. All me baby. I'm sorry you have to read and see all those things. You dont deserve any of it my princess," Jimin cups her face and looks at her in the eye, giving butterfly kisses all over her face. "You know right baby? You know right? You know I love you. I really really love you no matter what they said. And I know this is my baby and nothing is going to change that," he rubbed her tummy softly.
"I-I know," Y/N lowered her gaze, avoiding his eyes, tears are starting to wet the corner of her eyes again. "B-But how could they Jimin? I dont care about what they say, I-I expeceted it, b-but this is too much,"
Jimin is puzzled. What is Y/N talking about?
"What is too much baby? What is it? Tell me baby?" Jimin coaxed, his hands still stroking her hair softly. With shaky hands, Y/N pulled out her phone and showed her one of the hate comments. But to Jimin's surprise, its not just a comment, but with it is attached a photo, which has been saved, copied and repost a thousand times over and now is floating all over the internet. How did he even missed it?
"Baby..." Jimin eyes flickered back to her face.
"Its too much Jimin," she sobbed and hugs him harder. Jimin clenched his fist, eyes closed, as he hugs her back tightly, no longer wanting to see that vile photo. A photo, obviously edited and photoshopped to show Y/N's face on another naked body doing sexual things with a man that is not him. The photo is even captioned with 'Save Jimin, She's a Slut'.
How could they do it to this extend?
Jimin always thought his fans are the best fan in the world. The most loving, caring and understanding fans anyone could ever asks for. Apparently not. They thinks he is a piece of object that they own. Not a human being with feelings on his own. With the right to fall in love and be happy with the girl of his dream. This is too much and Jimin would not just stand around doing nothing. Not when it hurts the most important person in the world to him.
"I swear baby, I'll take care of it. I promise. I promise," he whispered to her, wiping the tears off her face. "I love you Y/N. Whatever happens, we will get through this. I will make sure you will be okay. We will be okay. We and our little baby will be okay, I love you,"
Jimin spends the rest of the day holding her close in his arms, whispering words of forgiveness and love, his hands clench tight, mind spinning thinking of a way to destroy everyone who even dare to ruin their precious little family.
/////
"We already warn you about this Jimin," the PD sigh. "And you still wants to go through with it!"
"I know! But what do you expect me to do? To stay single for my fans forever? Y/N is pregnant with my kid. We are going to be a family Sir," he sighed, slumping himself down on the chair. "I know this is a risk we need to take, and Y/N and I understand that. But cant we at least take it down? We are not asking you to sue them or anything!"
"We will try our best Jimin. We will take down all those photos as fast as we could," Jimin sighed in relieved. "But we cant stop the hate comments Jimin. If you and Y/N wants to continue this, you better brace yourself. Thats the best advice I can give you," the PD gave him a small smile and patted his back before walking out. Leaving Jimin alone with his thoughts.
As time passes by and all the photos has been successfully taken down, the heat of the news have died down a little. Jimin thought a happy ending might come their way soon as the fans starts to forget. Sure, hate comments and cries of pleading for Jimin to leave Y/N constantly flooded their social media pages, but both Jimin and Y/N has learnt how to ignore it and go about their everyday lives.
Two weeks passes by with nothing more than hate comments, their baby is growing stronger by the day and Jimin and Y/N starts to feel happy again. And that is when everything starts to turn to shit. Someway, somehow, some of the fans managed to get the address of Y/N's apartment, her school and the part time coffee shop she works in. Jimin immediately asks her to stop working after a few girls, who are obviously fans of Jimin as they keep threatening her to break up with him starts stalking her and followed her around all day. But theres not much he can do about her classes and her home. Luckily no one ever followed her home or do anything towards her house and her university care about their student enough to offer enough security and protection as long as Y/N is in school grounds. Out of worry, Jimin made sure one of his managers always picks and sends Y/N home from her classes everyday. Gone were the days where she can freely go out with her friends or go grocery shopping alone. Jimin wouldnt let her and even Y/N knows better than to do it, especially with his fans who always seems to be lurking around somewhere in the corner.
Although Y/N stays locked in the safety of her own home, the obsessive fans managed to penetrate through to intimidate her. At first there are only letters, filled with threatening words sent to her daily. Y/N has soon learn to just ignore it and ripped it off the moment she received them everyday. But soon, more things starts to come her way.
"Delivery for Miss Y/N?" Y/N peeks her head out the door to see the delivery man smiling at her. After signing her name and curiously take the package, Y/N shakes the box. Its square and light, it doesnt make a sound and its wrapped nicely with a big pink bow. Did Jimin send her a surprise?
Excited, she sat down on her couch and starts to unwrapped the box, only to be screaming, immediately dropping the box from her hands once the content is revealed. Y/N's whole body shakes as tears starts to run down her face. Inside the nicely wrapped box lay a single red rose. A dead one. And not just dead, but is swarming with maggots and worms all over its petals. A small card was slipped in between, written on it was a message;
"We are are not kidding. Leave Park Jimin alone if you dont want to rot like the flower,"
With shaky hands, Y/N immediately picked up the box and threw it deep inside the trashcan, not planning to tell Jimin about it. She knows him too well. Jimin will explode and she would never let Jimin risk his career just for her. No. Never.
Trying to forget the rose incident is hard. But its even harder to avoid Jimin and keeping it a secret from him.
"Baby, you okay?" Jimin entered the apartment, looking at her in the eye.
"Yeah Chim. Why do you ask?" Y/N looks up from her magazune and eye her boyfriend who just came from a recording session.
"Well... maybe its because you seem to be avoiding me for a week now?" He stated rather to the point, irritated that Y/N seems to avoid him.
"N-No. You have just been busy. I'm not avoiding you," she gave him a small smile and turned away, knowing Jimin will see straight through her. Jimin did, and pulled her hand so she faces him.
"So you are saying avoiding my calls, not replying my texts and pretending to already be asleep whenever I came over after practice is not avoiding me?" Jimin glares at her. "Tell me whats wrong baby? Did someone bothers you again? Or did I do anything wrong?"
"N-No Chim. I'm just uh tired. The baby is making me tired these days," Y/N tried to create the perfect lie. At the mention of the baby, Jimin's face immediately turned into a huge grin.
"Right. I forgot pregnant woman feels like that. Baby, if you and baby mochi ever need anything, you need to tell me okay?" Jimin held her hands tight. "Anything at all. Tell me and I'll get it for you,"
"Y-Yeah Chim. Of course," she nodded hastily and smile. Wanting nothing more than to change the topic.
"Oh, this came for you downstairs," Jimin passed her a small box. Y/N felt all the blood drained from her face again. Could it be? Could it be that they sent her another disgusting thing? She is very sure she didnt order anything and Jimin obviously didnt buy her anything too.
"O-Oh.. just leave it on the counter. I'll open it later,"
"Why? You are always excited when you received a package. Come on baby, open it. I want to see what my beautiful girlfriend just bought," Jimin insisted and passed her the box. Y/N refused a few times but Jimin still insisted and she knows he will soon get curious, and she really disnr have an answer when he starts to question. So, praying hard that it isnt something similar to the other box she has received, she takes a deep breath and pulls open the big blue ribbon.
Again, the moment the lid popped open Y/N screamed her heart out, immediately dropping the box and turn around to bury her face into Jimin's chest, crying with all her might, because inside the beautifully wrapped box lay a dead bird, its head dislocated as if somebody has twisted it and a pen stuck on its stomach, blood still fresh and oozing out from the corpse.
"What the?!" Jimin pushed the box with his leg and thats when he saw the note.
"It seems you ignored the rose. Do you think we are kidding? Leave Park Jimin or you will face the same fate as the bird"
"Baby? What does it means you ignored the rose? What rose are they talking about baby? Are you hiding something from me?!" Y/N only looks at him with wide, scared eyes, still extremely shocked from the dead bleeding bird. "Baby, you have to tell me now!" Jimin shakes her shoulders.
"T-they sent me a rose swarming with live worms and maggots last week, threatenkng me to l-leave you..."she sobbed.
"What?!" Jimin was in shocked. He never thought his fans would act this way. Are they even his fans to begin with? "Why didnt you tell me?!"
"I-I dont want you to worry Chim..."
"What?!" Jimin was furious. What is she thinking hiding something like this from him? Just because she doesnt him to worry? Thats her excuse?
"Worry? I'm more than just worried right now Y/N! I'm furious! God damn it, how could they even think to do something like this? And how cluld you even think to hide it from me?! Thats it. You are staying with me at the dorm until we sort this out," Jimin made a decision on the spot, fuming with anger.
"What? No! How can I stay at the dorm. I-I would be a burden to the boys a-and your company and-"
"No fucking buts Y/N! The boys are my brothers. They will understand and they will also protect you. I dont want to hear it. You and our baby is my priority right now. Now pack your things and come with me!" Jimin growls and Y/N knows better than to disobey. Jimin might be small and sweet, sensitive and caring but he is really scary when he is furious and Y/N is not one to challenge him once he is in that state. Without another word, Y/N packed her clothes and neccessities and followed Jimin out, making a new home in the boys' dorm.
/////
"I'm quitting Bangtan!"
"No! You cant do that!" Y/N stood up from her chair so fast, she almost lost balanced. Luckily Taehyung was beside her to hold her stable. Jimin turns and glares at her.
"Really baby? After everything? You of all people should be the one who supports this decision!" He scoffed angrily, still bitter from the fact that she hides things from him.
"No Jimin!" Y/N walks over and held his arm. "You cant do that. Bangtan is important to you. You love being a part of them. They are your brothers and you get to do what you love doing on stage! I wont be the reason that make you leave all that!"
"Too bad baby, its not just up to you now. We have a baby to think about!" Jimin growled.
"Jimin, calm down," Taehyung chimed in, sensing the tension between the couple. "Maybe Y/N is right. Even if you quit, do you think they will stop harrasing her? The fans would be even angrier at Y/N, thinking shes the reason you quit,"
"But Tae!"
"Tae is right Chim. Quitting is not the answer. Calm down okay? At least Y/N is safe now with us. And we have reported the case to the police. We need to think carefully on how to handle this, not make rush decision," Namjoon second Taehyung's opinion, making Jimin sighed in frustration. Still, he knows his brothers' words makes sense. Quitting wont solve anything. What matters now is keeping Y/N safe.
"We will get through this Chim. We will do it together. Dont worry okay? We will make sure Y/N and the baby is safe and we will find a way to stop this. We will," Yoongi patted his back and offered him a small smile.
"I hope so hyung. I hope so,"
/////
"Jimin?" Y/N's voice is small as she calls out his name when they are finally alone in his room. Hoseok, being the nice person that he is decided to let Y/N and Jimin stayed in their room and moved in with Namjoon and Taehyung. He figured they need space and privacy, at least until this whole case is over.
"Yeah baby?" Jimin answered weakly.
"I know you are mad at me. At your brothers. For not supporting and agreeing your decision to quit," Y/N started off. "But... you know they are right... nothing good will come from you quitting," Y/N walks over and face him, looking into his eyes. "Jimin, I love you. And I love our baby. And I just know that we will be happy again some day. Some day, all this will pass. But leaving Bangtan, leaving your career, leaving the thing you love the most in the world... thats a too high price to pay for me Chim. Its something you shouldnt even have to do. Because I will still be here, with you, no matter what happens. We can do this okay?" She gave him a small smile. "Just I begged you, just hold on a little longer and everything will be just fine. I promise baby. I love you Park Jimin,"
Jimin looks at her with heart and eyes thats full of love. How in the world did he get so lucky to have found someone like Y/N in his life? So sweet, loving and understanding? And now shes carrying his baby, and is hurting, all because of him. She can easily choose to leave but she didnt. She stayed. She is the rock Jimin needs in his life and he knows now that as long as at the end of the day Y/N is here with him, everything will be okay.
"I love you Y/N, and I promise. I promise I will make it alright again," he leans his forehead with hers and hold her close before capturing her lips with his, hoping she could feel all the love he has for her.
/////
Jimin looks out at the cheering crowd from the stage. Thousands filled up the arena, as it always does everytime they held a concert. He is always proud of ARMYs. They are the best fan anyone could ever have, but after recent events... he cant believe these sweet people could ever do that to him, to Y/N. Namjoon gave out his last speech as usual after their last song. Saying his appreciation and thanks, but before they can say goodbye, Jimin cuts in.
"Hyung wait. I have something to say," the crowd went wild at Jimin's interruption while the boys all looks at him worriedly, hoping he wont cause a scene. "Hey guys, ARMYs," he greeted with a smile and the crowd cheers with their hellos.
"I'm Park Jimin and I'm human too," an awkward silent fell inside the arena, nobody knows how to react to Jimin's sudden statement. "Thats right. I'm a human. Just like you. Like all of you. I wake up every day, I eat my breakfast, I get ready and I do my work. Just like all of you who has your own job to go to, I have mine too. I love my job, I love coming out with new dance moves, and practice them, singing and recording them and most of all, performing them in front of all of you. Sharing what we have woth you... and I really hope I can do that for a long time," he paused and looks at the confused faces of the crowd. "I'm pretty sure many of you, just like me, like your own job too. So... I just want to ask you, to take a moment and put yourself in my shoe, our shoes and think. It is fair that we are only seen for our jobs, as an entertainer and nothing more? Not to be seen as a normal human being? Are we not given the rights to live, to love like we want to? If all of you have jobs you love, a job of your own choosing, and is allowed to fall in love with whoever you want to, get married, have children and live happily ever after,why cant we? Why does our lives has to be different? To be dictate by others just because of our different jobs? Dont get me wrong, I love performing. And I get how all of you care about us. I appreciate that and I love all of you for it. But I'm happy. I'm happy with Y/N. The girl you guys hated for no reason. Y/N, she has been my girlfriend for so many years by the way, kept hidden because people like me are not supposed to date, makes me happy. And now shes carrying my baby, and it makes me the happiest man alive right now. Can you imagine it? Having a family with the one you love? All of you are humans too, some of you who are lucky might have already experienced it, some is currently experiencing it and some will experience it. But right now, its my turn. I am lucky enough to be given a chance to feel what its like, and you wont let me? Why? Just because I'm an idol? I want to share that feeling with all of you, Y/N wants to share it with all of you. Can I? Will all of you let me? I know its hard to understand, but I beg you," Jimin falls down on his knees on stage and the other six boys slowly followed one by one, kneeling behind him in a line, "put yourself in our shoes and feel how painful it is to not be given the right to fall in love. Idols are humans too. We are human too. And I'm Park Jimin is a human too," Jimin ended his speech with a soft sniffle and the once quiet arena roared in applause, agreeing to what he said. Jimin didnt say anything else and immediately went back stage, feeling as exhausted as ever. He had said what he wanted to say and there is nothing else left to do. The boys came in one by one and they hug each other, forming a huge bear hug, not saying anything, letting their tears do the talking, all seven understanding exactly what each other is feeling.
/////
Jimin who was sleeping soundly as he hugs Y/N tight was awaken with a shake from Namjoon. He opens his eyes to see all six boys and even the PD looking at him with a smile.
"Whats going on?" He rubbed his eyes sleepily, the noise stirring Y/N awake who is also surprised with the crowded guests in their room.
"You did it Jimin," Taehyung yelled and jump on the bed, hugging him tight.
"Huh? I did what?"
"This!" Namjoon pushed an iPad in front of his face and Y/N peeks her hesd and read it together with him. Apparenrly his speech last night has stirred quite a commotion between fans. Not just their fans, but all fandom all around the world. Fans are agreeing to what he said and is now eliminating the common norm of not letting idols and celebrities dates and live their life. They no longer setting up a standard for them to follow.
"C-Chim... y-you did it. You changed the whole concept of idol worshipping!" Y/N squeals. "Not just for us, but for all celebrities everywhere. Oh my god, I'm so proud of you!"
"Yeah he did!" Hoseok agreed. "They even create a hashtag about this. Its #IdolsAreHumanToo and #ParkJiminIsHumanToo," he laughs loudly. "You are a hastag now!"
"Seriously?"
"Yup. It has become a campaign Chim. Fans all over the world are helping to eliminate any hate comments or anything like it. They will report and help to bring down any negativity regarding a celebrity life and choices. You really did it Jimin!" Namjoon proudly announced.
"I-I didnt mean for it to be that way. I'm just trying to make them understand. For Y/N. And for my baby," Jimin is still shocked.
"Well, you and Y/N are free now Chim. And your baby will be born into a hate free world where he or she can enjoy his father's performances soon without any worry," Hoseok laughs. "Congratulations Chim. Now all of us can find a girlfriend!" His statement makes the others laugh too as they went out from the room, leaving the two with some privacy.
Y/N looks at Jimin with a big smile.
"You did it baby," she whispered. "You fought for us. For our baby. And you won. I'm so proud of you,"
"And I will keep on fighting for us if I need to baby. I promise you that," he smiles at her, carressing her face. "I am Park Jimin, and I am a human who is in love with this beautiful girl and would do anything to ensure her safety and happiness,"
"And I'm L/N Y/N, and I am deeply, truly, fully in love with that Park Jimin,"
Jimin laughs and cups her face, slowly bringing her closer before he sealed it with a kiss.
A/N: Lets treat our idol as what they are okay? A human being. Its okay to swoon over them and appreciate their talents and looks, but remember they have the right to live like a normal human too. So I hope no one in here wluld sent a dead bird to any of the boys' significance other once they reveal that they have one okay? Hahaha
#bts#bangtan#bangtan scenarios#bangtan fanfic#bts park jimin#park jimin#jimin scenario#jimin#jimin fanfic#kpop#kpop fanfic#kpop scenario#jimin angst#jimin fluff
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Misc headcanons for Directator's assistant director yokai sidekicks!
* I think the Nosirs are actually brothers but for these guys i think theyre just a bunch of unrelated employees who share a uniform. Maybe draw them with variations in height and weight and stuff to tell them apart? And they probably have different hair under the hats.
* this yokai species is a water element fishman thing possibly based on The Shadow Over Innsmouth. Cos ive been doing a lot of thinking on why the heck they have those weird face markings and with the bulgy eyes they kinda do match the description of the early stage Deep Ones in that story. Either that or theyre kappas who hide their weak spot under caps. (Cappas?)
* their only power as yokai is super strength. They probably surprise people a lot by being so powerful, cos they never really bother to fight unless their boss is in trouble. Its mostly just an 'ultimate assistant' power that helps them carry lots of stuff for maximum efficiency.
* theres probably variants of this yokai for every type of minor job ever. I feel like its just the thing you turn into when youre a very normal dude who just wants to continue your normal job in the underworld. This trio are 100% content working for Directator and their idea of a peaceful afterlife is just the same as their regular life! No aspirations for bigger superpowers or anything, just gimme that magic ability to be even better at the job i love~
* not sure about names for the trio yet except one of them should be jerome cos thats a nice name. Their origin story is just that theyre unrelated employees who worked under Directator when he was human, and sorta bonded together into The Directator Protection Club. They were his most loyal assistants who stayed with him even as the studio made flop after flop, and even followed him into hell in the end. (Died trying to save him from a studio fire) They were all kind of aimless young adults for one reason or another, who didnt have much good in their life aside from this job and didnt have any positive familial figures except this strange little family they found together. So theyre not blood related but they treat each other like siblings and see Directator as a cool uncle figure that they all look up to. And theyre all roommates together now in the yokai world so basically yeah they got adopted in all senses except the Actually Saying It Out Loud sense
* Aside from their general shared personality of Being Cute And Enthusiastic And Supporting Their Boss i feel like maybe there are some small differences you notice after a while? From the titanic episode it seemed like one of them was kinda dopey innocently hero worshipping the boss and one of them was a sassy trickster who loved a chance to mess with the heroes, just based on the different way they animated them obeying the order to toss the heroes off the bungee jump. And one of them was shown dressing as a lady waitress in one of the scenes in the first episode, so im gonna grab that opportunity and say she's a trans girl. They all dress very similar while on the job just cos its practical clothing for work, but you can tell her apart by a small ponytail at the back of their identical hairstyles. (Probably the cute flame ponytail style like ghoulfather!) Off duty she likes to dress a bit more femme, but her bros still support her as a woman no matter how she dresses. The only way to get these perpetually smiling doofuses to start a fight is to mix them up and misgender her! (Well, that or be mean to the boss also. Theyre just very ride or die for each other!)
* There actually are more of these yokai aside from the main three, Directator has picked up a few more employees over the years since he died. He can probably summon infinate hordes of them like ghoulfather can do with his mafia goons! Its just that these three have the main emotional bond with him so he trusts them to do all the most important jobs.
* they have an ultimate transformation that is just them on each other's shoulders in a trenchcoat. Their acting skill is so good that everyone universally believes this is a new form and they even gain boosted stats!
* in battle maybe their ability would be some sort of adaptability thing to reflect how theyre such multitalented helpers? Like 'all attacks are treated as non elemental' or 'changes elements to match the last hit taken'?
* also probably in battle theyd have combo abilities with directator, like he's able to revive them automatically whenever he gets a critical hit or something. I feel like them having low hp and frequently knocking themselves out in the process of protecting him is very in character
* directator remembers all their birthdays and throws a super theatrical big ol party~! They also celebrate the day each of them got hired and the day they made their first successful film in the yokai world, and then every time they have a new success too. Basically they love excuses to show how much they care for each other! Best buddies cinema club 4ever!!!
* Even though Directator can now poof up illusions of any set and costumes using his powers, he still prefers to let the assistants make all the most important critical stuff for each movie. He just feels sad that his newfound powers would be taking away a fun bonding experience that they used to have. But also obviously working your ass off to make everything on a short deadline ruins the fun of making arts and crafts together, so he's grateful he can take some of the work off their shoulders.
* the shape of directator's powers as a yokai came from not from his egotism but from his dying wish being to ease the burden on his employees who were always so loyal to him. He also likes to use his illusions to help them out with stuff even when theyre not working, though he still has to say lights camera action and etc so its a lil funny. Like 'oh no assistant number 3 is going out on a date and her dress is ruined!' then he runs in with one of those clapboard things and is like CUT! TAKE TWO! *poofs up an illusion dress with a star wipe transition* Keeps pausing the scene and telling her boyfriend to show more emotion, lol. Like overprotective dad cliche but its more 'are you hammy enough to be worthy of my niece?? Show me your best death scene!' Also has an entire orchestra follow them around and do a soundtrack to their date. 'Darling it'll be a sensation! Directator's secret masterpiece: the film only you get to see! Cmon boys this is our most important production yet!' Very well intentioned but predictably he ends up ruining the date by trying so hard to make it perfect for her, and she's like 'aww dont worry boss, if that guy cant handle my family then he's not the right dude for me anyway' *hugs and end of episode* *but also yknow..he still learns his lesson and interferes less in his friends's lives next time*
* maybe two of the trio have the same names? Like "here's my supreme team: Ashley A, Ashley B and Jerome!"
* give them a special attack where they just three hit combo Directator with a big ol wholesome hug of admiration and all his stats go up. 'Boss you really brightened up our lives!' 'And our afterlife!'
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imagine someone just going 1-200 and you have to answer 200 questions for a stranger
well u better strap up becuase im about to do it
200: My crush’s name is: i dunno who do u think my crush’s name is199: I was born in: a year which is 2004198: I am really: a homo sapien197: My cellphone company is: i think its samsung196: My eye color is: brown195: My shoe size is: 9 or 9.5 i think just 9194: My ring size is: WAIT RINGS HAD SIZES????? i dunno193: My height is: 5′4 ISH but i just say 5′4 because im actually really sensitive about my height and the less than an inch that brings me to 5′4 makes me somewhat happier with myself192: I am allergic to: maybe dustmites 191: My 1st car was: not yet190: My 1st job was: NOT YET189: Last book you read: technically a book called Dad Jokes theyre really funny jokes but if you mean story with plot then probably Grand & Humble unless if you include everything then yesterday i peeked in some books188: My bed is: a bed which i sleep in and that’s pretty much it actually i havent really made my bed in a while 187: My pet: jax and nibsy r the family pets jax is a shih-poo shihtzu poodle mix and nibsy is a cat186: My best friend: my brother185: My favorite shampoo is: shampoo184: Xbox or ps3: hard choice there’s xbox overall and little big planet this is actually a very hard choice lksiiro3jedsklmf,gsda little big planet is great........................183: Piggy banks are: piggy banks. theyre great182: In my pockets: I DONT HAVE POCKETS IM A WOMAN181: On my calendar: whats a calendar lol!!!!180: Marriage is: marriage 179: Spongebob can: dodod od odo dodooo178: My mom: IS GREAT i lov her shes a good mom177: The last three songs I bought were? i dont buy songs i listen to them176: Last YouTube video watched: i mean im listening to boyfriend big time rush on youtube right now but if you mean actual watching its snufkin saying “hi moomin” to moomin a quick 6 second clip175: How many cousins do you have? i duno174: Do you have any siblings? yeah173: Are your parents divorced? yeah172: Are you taller than your mom? probably not :(171: Do you play an instrument? i play the trumpet i did it today and it was really boring i dont want to go to any more graduations not even my own170: What did you do yesterday? things[ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: not really but somewhat and i like it because its a fun little thing to put in fiction 168: Luck: yea im very lucky167: Fate: its my destiny to die someday . . .. . in the futuuuuuuuuuuure
166: Yourself: as far as im aware no165: Aliens: yeah probably164: Heaven: i know it probably isnt real but i cant help believing163: Hell:i know it probably isnt real but i cant help believing162: God: only to blame them for stuff161: Horoscopes: yea theyre fun to read160: Soul mates: ehehehehehhe fun in fanfiction and would greatly b ok with it irl159: Ghosts: who else would hold my hand at night...... not even a ghost :) (but yea i do believe in them when i grow up i wana be a ghost)158: Gay Marriage: why wouldnt i believe in gay marriage 157: War: what is it good for156: Orbs: borb155: Magic: i like magic so i will believe in it [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: yes153: Drunk or High: probably high i guess152: Phone or Online: ONLINE151: Red heads or Black haired: black haired 150: Blondes or Brunettes: BRUNETTES dude blondes r ok but i personally like darker hair149: Hot or cold: hot148: Summer or winter: SUMMER I HATE WINTER SO FUCKIGNT OASJKU*($@IRWJKOSDIUOKLJEZUDIFLK:LDSK:LKF:LJIODSKZVDJFKL mostly becuase i hate being cold and i hate snow becuase i have to shovel snow and its so cold147: Autumn or Spring: either one 146: Chocolate or vanilla: choc o late145: Night or Day: night144: Oranges or Apples: apples143: Curly or Straight hair: curly but i guess straight is ok142: McDonalds or Burger King: burbger king good milkshakese141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: idk uhh milk chocolate140: Mac or PC: pc139: Flip flops or high heals: neither......138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: ugly and rich i can just buy surgeries to make me prettier lmao137: Coke or Pepsi: coke136: Hillary or Obama: i dont wanna answer this :(((((( i dont like being bullied135: Burried or cremated: cremated babye put me in the flames ;3c134: Singing or Dancing: i like singing i like dancing i like trains 133: Coach or Chanel: what132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who are these people131: Small town or Big city: im just a mere small town babye ;3c big cities sound scary 130: Wal-Mart or Target: target has the good cheeseballs129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: i only know adam sandler128: Manicure or Pedicure: i dont do my nails 127: East Coast or West Coast: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh both are coasts126: Your Birthday or Christmas: birthday i get more gifts then uwu125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate124: Disney or Six Flags: disney because idk what six flags is isnt it a restaurant or something123: Yankees or Red Sox: a baseball bat [ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: what is it good for!121: George Bush: idk 120: Gay Marriage: yeah gay rights119: The presidential election: im not that into politics so i dont understand the elections and i dont think their fair since i get all my facts from adam ruins everything this isnt even a joke118: Abortion: pro choice i dont giv a crap about some lifeless baby. its only alive if it can properly move its arms or cry or feel.117: MySpace: haha dead116: Reality TV: idk 115: Parents: theyre parents 114: Back stabbers: ow my back113: Ebay: website.... money112: Facebook: lizard man111: Work: what110: My Neighbors: idk who they are but my old neighbor was one of my best friends i should talk to him this summer109: Gas Prices: probably too high108: Designer Clothes: clothes107: College: something i dont plan on going to any time soon106: Sports: something i dont plan on doing any time soon105: My family: a family104: The future: spooky. very scary. idk what my job will be[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: idk (update it was today)102: Last time you ate: 4:13 ish i made ramne101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: i duno100: Cried in front of someone: today i suppose i almost cried???? maybe my dentist appointment a few weeks ago??99: Went to a movie theater: lego movie 2 i think98: Took a vacation: 6th grade im in 9th grade now its been like 3 years97: Swam in a pool: over 1 year i dont go to the pool anymore96: Changed a diaper: NEVER AND I NEVER PLAN ON IT95: Got my nails done: i duno94: Went to a wedding: i also dunno its been too long93: Broke a bone: not that i can recal92: Got a peircing: never and never will91: Broke the law: i duno90: Texted: just now i told my mommy to pick me up it wasl ike 1 hour ago[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: me88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my momy and nibsy and jax and probably zach but he’d already move out by the time i leave87: The last movie I saw: i dont remember probably lego movie 2 or osmething on tv86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: next year drama club85: The thing im not looking forward to: dying?????? idk man 84: People call me: moto moto (not really idk what they call me)83: The most difficult thing to do is: the most difficult thing82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never though i probs will someday81: My zodiac sign is: aquarius sun leo moon aries rising80: The first person i talked to today was: probably kiley79: First time you had a crush: kindergarten i think78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: myself77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: idk76: Right now I am talking to: nobody 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: *has a crisis over my future plans as i do not know*74: I have/will get a job: im gona work at target or burger king next year maybe it depends on if they like me73: Tomorrow: 5/20..............72: Today: today71: Next Summer: in a theater near u70: Next Weekend: my first summer weekend 69: I have these pets: I ALREAD YSAID WHAT PETS I HAVE I LOVE NIBSY WITH ALL MY HEART and jax with some extra parts of my heart68: The worst sound in the world: a sound67: The person that makes me cry the most is: me66: People that make you happy: me65: Last time I cried: ealier today64: My friends are: online63: My computer is: on62: My School: is a school61: My Car: nonexistent 60: I lose all respect for people who: are really mean and seem to hate people for being happy. people who make jokes that make me uncomfortable. i generally avoid them.59: The movie I cried at was: all of them58: Your hair color is: brown57: TV shows you watch: idk56: Favorite web site: idk probs youtube55: Your dream vacation: nowhere 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: A FEW WEEKS AGO I GOT STITCHES IN MY MOUTH AND IT REALLY HURT UGHGTUERIJOKFLDc53: How do you like your steak cooked: edible52: My room is: a room51: My favorite celebrity is: myslef..... just kidding idk any celebs 50: Where would you like to be: where i am 49: Do you want children: no 48: Ever been in love: hoo ha hoo ha i duno how love feels exactly47: Who’s your best friend: MY BROTHER46: More guy friends or girl friends: guys i think 99% of my friends are my brothers friends so45: One thing that makes you feel great is: being happy44: One person that you wish you could see right now: nobody right now but sometimes kiley43: Do you have a 5 year plan: 5 years??? haha no i only plan on using savings accounts to make a bit more money and MAYBE moving to kiley but idk for sure since i like my parents and my brother and my parents plan on driving around in an rv but idk man moving to another state would be HARD and im kinda lazy and i’d have to get a whole new driver’s license 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: no41: Have you pre-named your children: lmao all my ideas are jokes40: Last person I got mad at: probably myslef39: I would like to move to: my bed???????38: I wish I was a professional: personer. talker. socialer. [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: probably snickers or a salted nut roll36: Vehicle: big car. tahoe shape. tahoe size. idk. something like a tahoe thats my only reference35: President: I Don’t Care34: State visited: probably florida its the only one of 3 states i’ve been to33: Cellphone provider: what32: Athlete: WHAT31: Actor: idk 30: Actress: idk29: Singer: not me? me? idk28: Band: taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally hall??? ? ?? ? ?? ? ? ? I DONT KNOWIJ DSKJZLFKSJKLDSHDLfjklskl;fdkl;sfk;laf 27: Clothing store: i legit have like no faves god this is the hardest part26: Grocery store: target probably25: TV show: maybe the simpsons???24: Movie: idk ive seen a lot of movies23: Website: one of them22: Animal: one of them21: Theme park: universal studios20: Holiday: none of them theyre all ok but ??? meh19: Sport to watch: none.18: Sport to play: idk i dont like being competitive but??????? gym class is a fun sport! :)17: Magazine: none of them16: Book: one of them15: Day of the week: wednesday sounds like a good day. maybe sundays. 14: Beach: what13: Concert attended: frankly the only concerts i’ve been to are my own12: Thing to cook: probably ramen11: Food: cheeseballs??????? burger king milkshake, a drink?10: Restaurant: buuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrger kiiiiiiiiiiing?9: Radio station: 101.9 kelo eff emmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm8: Yankee candle scent: what7: Perfume: what6: Flower: what5: Color: red or purple4: Talk show host: wha
3: Comedian: i duno2: Dog breed: one of them1: Did you answer all these truthfully? yeah i tried but i kinda gave up slightly after i came back from a graduation party though i also kind of gave up from the start so
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