#worst part is I could’ve watched it but I chose my stupid friends

[paperglader]

IMOGEN WAS GAY ABOUT BEAU AGAIN AND I MISSED IT??????

[wisteriabookss]

An Extensive Analysis of Eris

The recent excerpt from ACOSF has got this fandom spinning on it’s head because it includes a feral-smiling Eris waltzing with Nesta. As a result, people have now delved deeper into his character and whether or not he deserves a redemption arc (or an arc of any kind). 

So naturally, he has been compared to Rhys, because Rhys also appeared to us in the beginning as a cruel, cunning person, who was eventually revealed to have a bigger heart, and a valid excuse (at least amongst the IC) for his behavior.

I made this post to mainly catalogue all that Eris has done, analyze his actions, see if he indeed can be compared to Rhys, and to determine whether or not he should have a redemption arc. 

What We Know So Far

Our first mention of Eris is in ACOMAF, when Rhysand is explaining to Feyre what happened to Mor. I could put the quotes here, but just to save some time I’m gonna make a long story short.

Mor’s father, Keir, declared that she was to be sold in marriage to Eris. Eris is known for being cruel, and Mor begged Rhys to stop it. Rhys brought her to the Illyrian camp for a few days, and she decided to sleep with Cassian in order to ruin her “pure” image. Because she slept with Cassian, Eris refused to marry her. Said, “she’d been sullied by a bastard-born lesser faerie, and he’d now sooner fuck a sow.” Her family, although it’s not said explicitly, basically beat her, and then dumped her body on the Autumn court border with a note nailed to her body that said she was Eris’s problem now. Eris left her for dead in the middle of their woods.

Now, we’re going to look at what he exactly said during this event, given to us from Mor’s POV in ACOFAS:

“Don’t touch her.” Those steps stopped. It was not a warning to protect her. Defend her.

“No one touches her,” he said. Eris. “The moment we do, she’s our responsibility.” 

Cold, unfeeling words. “But—but they nailed a—” 

“No one touches her.”

A pale, beautiful face appeared above her, blocking out the jewel-like leaves above. Unmoved. Impassive. “I take it you do not wish to live here, Morrigan.”

He must have read it in her eyes. A small smile curved his lips. “I thought so.”

Eris took a step away. Someone behind him blurted, “We can’t just leave her to—” 

“We can, and we will,” Eris said simply, his pace unfaltering as he strode away. 

“She chose to sully herself; her family chose to deal with her like garbage. I have already told them my decision in this matter.” A long pause, crueler than the rest. “And I am not in the habit of fucking Illyrian leftovers.”

Now that we have Mor’s side of the story, we’re going to look at what Eris has said about that fateful day during a discussion with the IC in ACOWAR:

Mor snarled, rattling the glasses. “You never gave any evidence to the contrary. Certainly not when you left me in those woods.”

“There were forces at work that you have never considered,” Eris said coldly. “And I am not going to waste my breath explaining them to you. Believe what you want about me.”

. . . .

A frown at Mor as he drained his wine and set down the goblet. “I’m surprised you still can’t control yourself around him. You had every emotion written right on that pretty face of yours.”

“Watch it,” Azriel warned.

Eris looked between them, smiling faintly. Secretly. As if he knew something that Azriel didn’t. “I wouldn’t have touched you,” he said to Mor, who blanched again. “But when you fucked that other bastard—” A snarl ripped from Rhys’s throat at that. And my own. “I knew why you did it.” Again that secret smile that had Mor shrinking. Shrinking. “So I gave you your freedom, ending the betrothal in no uncertain terms.”

“And what happened next,” Azriel growled.

A shadow crossed Eris’s face. “There are few things I regret. That is one of them. But … perhaps one day, now that we are allies, I shall tell you why. What it cost me.”

A main takeaway from this is that there seems to be much more to story of what happened between Eris and Mor.

Does that mean him leaving her in the woods is excusable? No. Absolutely not. He didn’t try to take the nail out of her (which would’ve been the bare minimum), he didn’t alert Rhys that she was there, he didn’t do anything to help her. He started to make the situation even more traumatic by saying vile things to her. Whatever reason he gives for not helping her will be just that: a reason. But not an excuse. Those are two very different things.

Eris say’s that leaving her there is one of the few things he regrets. There’s something in that. I’m not saying under any circumstance that he should be forgiven because he feels guilty, thats stupid as hell, but it is showing that he’s not some apathetic, other-worldy evil person. There’s some semblance of a conscious in him. 

He also say’s that one day he’ll tell them why he did it and what it cost him. By what it cost him, I’m guessing he’s talking about the cost of ending his betrothal to Mor, because I can’t think of what he lost by leaving her there. 

I don’t think there’s been any mention of someone getting revenge on Eris because A.) Rhys told Feyre that, “Azriel found her a day later. It was all I could do to keep him from going to either court and slaughtering them all.” and B) her family was obviously going to do nothing cause they’re the ones who hurt her.

I’m not going to try and theorize what cost Eris had to pay. It obviously is something (or someone) important to him.

But to me, one of the biggest things we got from this discussion is that it seems Eris knows Mor is gay. That secret smile of his that had Mor shrinking, the way he says he knows why she slept with Cassian, and that he gave Mor her freedom by ending the betrothal without giving a reason . . . he knows.

He knew she was gay, so he ended their engagement, no questions asked. And then Mor was dumped in his woods, and he did nothing to help. 

Morally grey, indeed.

(P.S. To the person that posted something along the lines of, “I can’t wait to see Mor’s face when she see’s Eris dancing with Nesta,” . . . get help)

Another excerpt I wanna look at also happens during the recent discussion we’ve just seen, but it has to do with Feyre and Lucien.

“You hunted me down like an animal,” I cut in. “I think we’ll choose to believe the worst.”

Eris’s pale face flushed. “I was given an order. And sent to do it with two of my … brothers.”

That little hesitation before he says ‘brothers’. . . sus. That’s all imma say. (maybe there’s more than one illegitimate son in that family . . .)

“And what of the brother you hunted down alongside me? The one whose lover you helped to execute before his eyes?”

Eris laid a hand flat on the table. “You know nothing about what happened that day. Nothing.”

Silence.

“Indulge me,” was all I said.

Eris stared me down. I stared right back.

“How do you think he made it to the Spring border,” he said quietly. “I wasn’t there— when they did it. Ask him. I refused. It was the first and only time I have denied my father anything. He punished me. And by the time I got free … They were going to kill him, too. I made sure they didn’t. Made sure Tamlin got word—anonymously—to get the hell over to his own border.”

Where two of Eris’s brothers had been killed. By Lucien and Tamlin.

Eris picked at a stray thread on his jacket. “Not all of us were so lucky in our friends and family as you, Rhysand.”

We see another semblance of conscious here when Eris refuses to take part in the slaughtering of Jesminda. To even be in the same room as it. He then made sure that Lucien wasn’t going to die by making sure Tamlin was at his border. 

I’m not putting these quotes here to say, “Look, he cares about stuff , so let’s excuse everything he’s done.” No. There is no excusing any of his actions. Just like we can’t excuse Rhysand’s behavior in the first two books, or Cassian’s, or Nesta’s, or even Feyre’s, etc. But what we can do is see the reasons for their actions, and try and understand why they acted the way they did. They have their reasons, and Eris has his. (P.S. I’m not trying to compare what they’ve done, I’m just noting that they all had reasons to do what they’ve done, and they all deserve to be heard out.)

Comparison To Rhys

As I said earlier, Eris has drawn a lot of comparisons to Rhys. I agree with most of them.

This fandom has catalogued all of Rhys’s questionable actions like . . .

*TRIGGER WARNING: words like sexually assaulted*

Rhys sexually assaulting Feyre three times in the first book by drugging her, and then compelling her to give him lap dances in front of the folks Under The Mountain. He then displayed Feyre again in a sexual manner in the second book in front of The Court of Nightmares as, and I quote, “The High Lords Whore.” 

In both situations he could’ve done things so much differently. In the first book, he could’ve just, oh I don’t know, kept her in her cell? Or maybe brought her upstairs as a normal person?

And in the second one she literally could have been ANYTHING else. Everyone thinks she’s his prisoner, so why didn’t they go with that? Why couldn’t he have just dressed her in some raggedy-ass clothing, messed up her hair, and then tell her to act super stoic or frightened? Really Rhys, she just had to be your whore? (I know it was consensual but that doesn’t make her persona okay. He could’ve picked literally anything else)

Did he have his reasons for doing this? Yes. Does his reasons excuse what he did? No. You don’t have to make everyone else around you act a part just because you do.

So while we may not excuse Rhys’s actions, we can understand his reasons even if we don’t agree with them. Same with Eris. We know Eris has his reasons, and I doubt we’ll all agree with them, but he still has them.

Let’s also not forget that Rhysand made a deal with Eris and Keir that he would support Eris’s claim to the Autumn Court throne when Eris decides to kill his father for it. He also allowed Keir and his court to come into Velaris, and even though they’ll be turned away by every vendor, he still allowed them in. While he had his reasons for doing this (the Darkling army for ACOWAR) he still did it. It still hurt Mor.

Redemption Arc 

My biggest hesitation in thinking Eris will get a redemption arc is wondering where it would fit in the books for him to have one. We don’t know how if his waltz with Nesta is just a one-time thing or if it’s a result of a friendship between the two. The second book is supposed to be centered around Elain, Azriel, and Lucien, so that could also be a spot where he get’s an arc, maybe through a relationship with Lucian or Azriel. 

Either way, I’m not gonna bring down the hammer and say that he shouldn’t get a redemption arc. Tbh, the term ‘redemption arc’ kinda annoys me because it shouldn’t be about redeeming what was done in the past, but more about learning from past mistakes and taking the initiative to grow into a better person. That’s what I want for Eris. He’s not going to magically be revealed to be this super sweet fun-loving guy like Rhys. I don’t want him to be revealed like that either. 

I just want to see more of his character, see why he is the way he is, and, like i’ve said a million times in this post, know his reasons for acting the way he does. 

One last thing before I go. I’m not interested in seeing any relationship blossom between Eris and the IC, or Nesta, and I think it’s unlikely anyways. There’s a possibility for them to have an understanding, sure, but no friendship. I know there are some people who automatically adore Eris because they hate Mor and that’s just stupid. Mor isn’t my fav either, but I won’t cheer Eris on just because he hurt her. 

That’s all I’ve got. If you’ve made it this far, I appreciate you. Really.

[unmaskedagain]

Not Waiting forever

I’m pretty sure this has been done like a million times already. But I decided I’m going to try to answer as many prompts, that are already in my asks, as I can before I burn out. I AM NOT CURRENTLY TAKING PROMPTS.

THESE will not be full-fledged fics but more than likely ONE-SHOT drabbles. I need to push through my writer’s block. This is disregarding Miracle Queen.

 …It wasn’t Marinette’s choice.

Ladybug, the new guardian after Fu’s tragic heart attack, had gave her opinion but that was it. Kwami were stubborn. No matter what Marinette said in defense of Alya and Nino, Trixx and Wayzz. None of the Kwami were willing to be given out to anyone they didn’t give express approval of anymore. It wasn’t a risk they could take. And now that Marinette was the Guardian on top of being a full time hero, they couldn’t allow just anyone to watch her back. They all decided that Marinette needed someone she could trust and who trusted her. And just as importantly, they needed wielders who better fit them.

Alya failed to see through Lila Rossi. She fell too easily for lies to be a master of illusion. Instead of searching for the truth, gathering evidence, she rather just believe what she’s told. She demanded proof from Marinette rather than believing her friend over someone she just met. She was stubborn and once Alya’s mind was set on something, there was no stopping her.

Trixx refused to go back to her. The kwami wanted someone more creative and free thinking. Maybe a different type of writer, she said. A clever story teller.

Nino failed to stand by his friend when she needed him the most. His lack of loyalty to one of his oldest childhood friends had left a bad taste in Wayzz’s mouth. He chose Alya’s side, and thus Lila’s, without even bothering to hear what Marinette had to say. Or even demanding that they at least take her view into consideration.

If Nino couldn’t stand by his dear friend over a minor issue, the Kwami couldn’t trust he’d guard Ladybug’s back, who a technically stranger to him. Wayzz refused to allow Nino to be his holder again.

           Marinette had gotten more than a bit defensive because despite everything that was going on in class, she still believed Alya and Nino would come around. She believed that the two, and everyone else in class, would realize Lila was lying.  It was just a matter of time.

“That’s the issue, Mistress,” Wayzz frowned at her. “You shouldn’t have to wait for them to have your back.” He told her.

           Trixx nodded, “Alya could’ve easily looked up any of Lila’s claims when you told her Lila was lying. But she didn’t because she didn’t want to. Lila’s tales about Ladybug are a hit on her blog. Alya would rather cling to fool’s gold because its shiny than do what she knows is right.”

           Marinette crossed her arms, “Alya can just get a little… excited. You know how much the Ladyblog means to her!”

“Yes. We do,” Trixx nodded. “What we don’t know is how much you do. From what we can tell… not that much. Alya would rather think you’re jealous,” Trixx added, “And that you’re the problem than consider that her and the entire class got duped. It’s not fair.”

“Your friends routinely ditch you,” Wayzz reminded her. “Ignore you in class, believe the worst about you. They have all but severed their friendship with you completely. This has been going on for months. This is not something that can just be blamed on Lila’s falsehoods. It was their own choices that led to this. We do not trust them.

“I trust them?” Marinette offered weakly.

           Trixx and Wayzz shared a look before shaking their heads.

“No,” Wayzz said. “You want to trust them.”

“There’s a difference,” Trixx told her. “You want to trust them like you want them to be the friends you knew again. You want them back. I’m sorry, Marinette. But we want new holders. All the Kwami do.”

“You need a team now,” Wayzz stated. “Not a later. Hawkmoth is growing stronger. You need allies. It’s time.”

“Pollen doesn’t want a new holder,” Marinette said petulantly.

           There was silence.

“…Pollen was always the weird one,” Wayzz shrugged. “Pollen will never change her mind about Chloe.”

           Marinette narrowed her eyes. That had been the longest argument ever. Eventually Marinette had lost the battle when she was forced to admit how much the blond hero had improved over time. Chloe hadn’t bullied or hurt anyone’s feeling in a very long time. There had been no tantrums or threats to call her daddy. Even without a mask, Marinette had spotted Chloe helping people escape Akumas at the risk of herself. She was proving to be a hero outside of being Queen bee. Marinette did trust her to fight by her side which had been the deciding factor.

Plus Pollen refused to give in, and the only one the Kwami would pick. So Marinette gave in. She went to Chloe as Ladybug and gave her the hair clip.

“Welcome to the team,” Ladybug smiled as best she could.

           Chloe held the hairclip with disbelief and tears in her eyes, “I’m going to be a hero? You trust me.”

“You are a hero,” Ladybug said and did the bravest, and possibly the stupid thing in her life, “Spots off.” She detransformed in front of Chloe. The blonde’s mouth dropped. “And I do trust you.”

“Dupain-Cheng!” Chloe hissed but then goarned. “I should’ve known.”

“Yes, Chloe gets to stay.”

           Trixx giggled, “Pollen only likes Queen Bees, and she hasn’t come across any better than Chloe at your school.”

“And, while, Chloe didn’t like you before, she does now.” Wayzz admitted, “She was always very loyal to Ladybug. She has potential to be a good hero if we can break her love of the limelight completely.”

           Marinette huffed.

“And I remind you, there were conditions,” Wayzz advised. “A new costume and a new name. New hair color. Whatever it takes. She can never tell the public who she really is. Killer Wasp has a nice ring to it.”

           Marinette sighed and slumped face first onto her. She could hear Tikki snickering in the background and vowed to only bring oatmeal cookies to her for the next week.

What was Marinette going to do? What could she do? She had been so excited when the Kwami told her they wanted to get more permanent use like Tikki and Plagg… Until they broke the news. (And just a bit of Marinette’s heart)

           Now Marinette had to find new users.

           Trixx wanted a creative free thinker who wasn’t the least bit stubborn. A different type of writer, Trixx has suggested. A clever story teller.

           Wayzz wanted who had the natural born ability to be a protector. Someone smart and hardworking who had proven themselves to be loyal.

           Marinette’s head snapped up and she glared at the two Kwami, “You already know who you want, don’t you?”

           Trixx and Wayzz smirked.

“In my chosen’s defense,” Wayzz started, “She has proven herself to be loyal to a fault. And with the right amount of confidence, she will be an extraordinary ally.”

“My chosen is so creative,” Trixx swooned, “The most brilliant imagination. As a natural storyteller, his mind was born to see all the possibilities. It allows him to come up with theories and ideas no one else would even consider. There is no illusion he can’t see through because as soon as he sees it hundreds of different explanations run through his head.”

           Marinette raised an eyebrow and gave them firm stare. “Who is it?”

“I want Marc!” Trixx said happily.

The bluenette looked thoughtful for a moment but eventually nodded, admitting that Marc would be a good match for Trixx. “Agreed, I will give Marc a trial run to test his abilities.” Then Marinette turned to Wayzz who was looking very sheepish.

“Hear me out, if we get my chosen on our side, she’d be unstoppable,” Wayzz told her. “There would be nothing she wouldn’t do for those she cares for.”

“Who. Is. It?” Marinette asked again.

“I like her,” Wayzz insisted. “She has potential. If she was just a bit bolder…”

“Wayzz…” Marinette said.

Trixx snickered, “There’s a reason Wayzz gave into Chloe…”

Marinette paused. She slowly sat up on her bed, and looked at Wayzz long and hard, “…Sabrina? You want Sabrina!!!”

“Yes.”

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” The shout could be heard all over Paris.

“She hated me,” Marinette reminded the kwami.

“Disliked you,” Wayzz corrected. “But only because Chloe did. Once Sabrina found out you and Chloe had become friends, you have to admit she has become rather sweet. She’s a hard worker and defended you against Lila three times last week.”

“And you do like her,” Trixx added. “Why else would you have a slumber party with Chloe and Sabrina?”

“…I hit my head a lot during fights,” Marinette shrugged. “Magic can’t take away all the damage.”

           She sighed. Marc and Sabrina, huh? Marinette wondered how that was going to work out. She hated to admit it but Wayzz and Trixx were right. Ladybug couldn’t wait anymore. She needed a team. One she could count on in and outside of the mask. The city needed more heroes.

           It wasn’t right to make them wait just because she clung to a hope that everything would go back to the way it was. Marinette really missed her friends but she couldn’t wait for them anymore. It had been months.

           And even if everyone in class discovered Lila’s was lying, that Marinette wasn’t a jealous, nasty bully, that she was their friend… That Marinette had always been their friend… It wouldn’t matter.

           Truthfully, after everything that had happened, Wayzz was right. Marinette didn’t trust them, she just wanted to. And that wasn’t enough.

           Not enough for Kwami, and not enough for her. (not anymore)

           Nothing could or would go back to the way it was no matter how much Marinette wished it. Once bitten, twice shy. A part of will never entirely trust them again. (Not when they traded her for fool’s gold already before.)

           Paris needed more permanent heroes. Ladybug needed a team. Marinette needed people she could trust.

           She was done waiting.

(She wondered how Alya and Nino would handle being replaced...)

…

…

            ...They didn’t take it well.

(Sabrina, Shield Maiden, and Marc, Renard Masqué, thrived as heroes.)

[all-my-love-for-harry]

A priority.

summary: Y/N defends herself from the hate and Harry gets mad.

word count: 1.9k

warnings: angst!

a/n: a little something to hold onto until i finish some requests for my shy little boy, hope you like this! (i’m on a roll, sorry for posting so much mjsiw)

you can find the rest of my masterlist here

❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ 

Ugly. Worthless. Bitch. And her personal favorite, slut. Those words along with some others were all over Y/N’s social media accounts every single day.

Ever since some bloody paparazzi took a picture of Harry and Y/N holding hands while shopping, Y/N couldn’t go online without having thousands of strangers on the internet throwing names at her.

She should’ve seen it coming, honestly. It was stupid to think they could hide their relationship forever, she just wished fans wouldn’t be so aggressive towards her.

Y/N wanted to understand, she really did. For a solid week she convinced herself they were just being protective over Harry, but after the insults and derogatory comments about her imagine didn’t stop, she started to grow annoyed. She started believing fans just didn’t want to see him happy.

Y/N had to bit her tongue numerous times, knowing that if she stood up for herself, it would only be worse. So she tried to ignore it.

She didn’t stop using social media, why the hell would she stop having a life because of fans that couldn’t contain their need to harass every person Harry became close with?

A month after the pictures of them were out for the entire world to see, Harry had to travel to the States for work. He was supposed to be away for only two weeks, and Y/N was going to stay at his house a couple of days before his arrival so they can spend time together right away.

Laying on the couch, Y/N scrolled mindlessly through her Instagram feed, seeing what her friends and family were up to. She rolled her eyes when her notifications started to go off, not really wanting to enter and see her entire comment section below her posts full of hate towards her.

But curiosity killed the cat.

Promising herself she would only have a look, she clicked her notifications. She had posted a picture yesterday when she went out with a couple of her girlfriend, so all the comments were directed towards that post.

She’s dressed like a slut here

Can’t believe Harry is dating her…

He can do so much better, what a shame

It can be so easy to slip into a mindset where she let these type of things affect her and her confidence, but she simply chose not to. These people didn’t know her, and probably never will.

I can’t wait for harry to realize the kind of whore you are and dumps your fucking ass.

Oh well, that’s hilarious. Now she was mad. Probably picking a fight wasn’t the smartest decision she’s ever made, but she couldn’t help it. She let the anger speak for itself as she pressed the reply bottom and started writing directly to that specific comment.

‘So he can date you instead or what?”

Send.

Y/N dropped her phone on her lap, deciding it was enough internet for the day. She decided to move to the kitchen and start on the cupcakes she had previously planned to bake her boyfriend. Harry wasn’t one to allow himself to eat a lot of unhealthy stuff, as he has always tried to be as healthy as possible. But, man, cupcakes were something Harry absolutely loved.

She didn’t really touched her phone for the rest of the afternoon, staying busy in other things. She had a facetime call with Harry at night, and she was looking forward to see his face, even if it was only through the phone. Her phone didn’t have enough battery, so she turned on her computer to wait for Harry’s call.

The screen lightened, showing Harry’s upcoming call. Y/N furrowed, thinking he was way earlier but she wouldn’t complain about it. She answered the call, expecting to see her beautiful boyfriend’s dimpled smile on the screen, but she was surprised when she saw a serious look instead.

“Why would you do that, Y/N?” he asked sternly.

“Do what?” Was this some kind of joke?

“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Y/N. Don’t play dumb”

“Excuse me?” she raised her eyebrows. “Maybe if you explained what you mean we could talk about it”

Harry rolled his eyes. “Do you have any idea how disrespectful it was from you to answer like that to a fan? It was unnecessary and, to be honest, childish from you”

Y/N was surprised. “Yeah, maybe I was rude but I don’t think I was being childish, Harry”

“Yes, you were. Are you aware of how this makes me look? You can’t just say things like those and don’t think it wouldn’t affect my image too”

Well, what the fuck. “Ah, yes. Treat people with kindness and whatnot. I guess that doesn’t include your fucking girlfriend, because the only reason why I said what I said was because your bloody fans wouldn’t stop harassing me!” Now her face had a deep frown.

“You sure you’re not being a little dramatic? I mean, how bad could the hate get?”

“How bad?! Harry, do you even go online? To them I’m nothing but a fucking whore, do you have any idea of how fucking frustrating is to be treated like you’re the worst human being by your fans just because we’re dating?”

“There’s always gonna be people like that, Y/N” he sighed. “You need to learn how to ignore it”

“Do you think I haven’t tried? I’m sorry but it is not my fault the fans can’t contain themselves from sending death threats to every person that breaths close to you!” she paused. “Do you seriously just called me to scold me?”

“Well, I’m not happy about what you did, to be honest. They’re my fans, Y/N. They deserve to be respected”

“And I don’t?” she raised an eyebrow. “You know what? I’m done. Enjoy your day alone tomorrow because I’m fucking leaving”

“Leaving? What do you mean?” Harry’s pulse started to rise, watching his girlfriend stand up from the bed, the computer moved and he saw she was in his house. “Y/N, don’t leave. We’ll talk about this tomorrow”

“No, I’ve heard enough. I don’t want to talk to you right now” She closed her computer, hanging up. She put on her jacket and took her phone from the nightstand.

Before she exited the house, she went to the kitchen and threw the cupcakes she made in the trash.

Harry, you fucking asshole.

They’ve only dated for seven months and have never really got into a fight before. Y/N was a very impulsive person, more so when she was mad. Fuck, she knew his fans were important to him, she understood that. But it was becoming too much for Y/N to handle.

She loved Harry, she was truly in love with him. But was it really worth it to go through all of this if he wasn’t even willing to stand up for her?

❁ ❁ ❁ ❁

Harry changed his flights. After Y/N hung up on him, he realized he behaved like a proper asshole. He could’ve said so many things differently, without offending her the way he did.

He didn’t like she thought she wasn’t important to him. He was scared all the baggage he carried with him was a deal breaker for her, it has been on the past for almost every other relationship he has ever had.

It wasn’t fair of him to straight up scold her without hearing her first. He was upset and didn’t think enough before speaking, and now he regretted it.

He knew he needed to fix things. Fast.

Even though the night before Y/N made very clear she wasn’t staying, a part of him still hoped to see her curled up on the couch watching Netflix and waiting for him to arrive, but he was welcomed by an empty house.

He sighed, passing his hand through his curls, thinking how he could make it up to her. He went to the kitchen, where he kept his car keys. Harry stopped his tracks when he saw the trash can.

His heart dropped to his stomach when he noticed the homemade untouched cupcakes tossed into the trash.

He better make this right.

❁ ❁ ❁ ❁

Y/N was bored. She had cleared her schedule because Harry was coming home and now she had nothing to do other than drown on her sorrows.

Being bored and upset at her boyfriend, made her take the decision to take an afternoon nap on her couch. She had been asleep for a little while when someone started banging at the door.

You see, Harry had a key to her place, but he feel undeserving of using it after the way he treated her. But she wasn’t answering, and it wasn’t because she wasn’t home, he had seen her car in the parking lot of her apartment building.

Keying into her place, he looked around for his girlfriend, finding her sleeping figure on the couch, a blanked wrapped around her. He didn’t want to wake her up but they really needed to talk, so he kneeled down to be at the same eye level.

“Y/N… Y/N, wake up” he shook her a little. Her eyelashes fluttered a little before her eyes opened, a frown immediately appearing on her face.

“What are you doing here?” She sat down, taking the blanked off of her and crossing her arms.

“I’m so sorry, baby”

“Now I’m baby? Not the childish Y/N you were scolding yesterday?”

He sighed, moving to sit in the coffee table to be in front of her. “I’m sorry for the way I behaved yesterday, it wasn’t fair for you”

“It wasn’t”

“I was upset, Jeff had sent me a screenshot of the comment and I didn’t even check social media. It was impulsive and wrong from me and I apologize”

“I don’t like the way you talked to me yesterday, Harry”

“I know. If I could take it back, I would in a heartbeat. Please don’t leave me over this, my love” he grabbed her hands, feeling tears threaten to spill out of his eyes. “I know it isn’t fair for you, I know you’ll have to put up to so much shit, but please, please don’t give up on us. I swear I’ll make it right, Y/N, I don’t want these kind of situations get in the way of us”

“I’m not going to leave you” she mumbled. “I’m upset, yes. I know I was wrong too, but it all got too much and i… snapped. I know these kind of things affect your image and reputation too, so I’m sorry”

“I don’t care about my image. I should’ve said something sooner, before it all went out of control. I suppose I ignored it, hoping you’d do the same. I’m sorry for not checking up with you about this”

Y/N gave him a little smile, pulling from his hands to make him sit beside her. She wrapped her arms around his torso, pushing herself into his chest. “I know your fans are important to you, and you love them. I swear I want to have a good relationship with them, because they’re a huge part of your life, and I’m gonna work on that, I promise”

“And I promise I’ll stand up for you. I love my fans, so much. But you’re my girlfriend, my priority” he kissed her forehead. “I love you, Y/N, my baby”

“I love you more, love” she planted little kisses on his chin and jaw.

“Enough to make me more cupcakes?” Y/N let out a belly laugh, nodding. “Good. You owe me after you threw those to the trash”

“That’s what you get for being a meanie”

[urmyonly-vision]

Tolerate it

Description: This series is very loosely based on Taylor Swifts ‘Tolerate it’. The lyrics and imagery in this song are amazing and thought this pairing would go perfectly. Unrequited love is a bitch amirite :’) Anyway, if this doesn't mention Brock as much, its because I want the focus to be on Steve and the reader. They both deserve each other wowowow.

Pairing: Brock x female reader, then Steve Rogers x female reader.

Warnings: Angst, fluff, self esteem issues.

Words: 1.5k

The dismal and misty rain poured outside the window of the dimly lit cafe. Every so often, the awning would shudder and rhythmically release the collected rain on the path below. Everyone outside seemed to be in a rush going somewhere and anywhere to avoid being drenched.

You began to feel more grateful that you were inside, warm and dry with your hands wrapped around your hot cup of coffee. Fiddling with the sugar cubes on the saucer, you heard the bell above the door tinkle. A rush of cold air swept through the cafe and you shivered, starting to rethink the booth you had chosen to sit in.

‘You do know that's the worst seat in this place’ a familiar voice said.

You looked up to see a tall man with blonde hair chuckling and shaking his head as he walked towards you.

‘Steve!’ you exclaimed with a smile.

You shuffled across the long seat and quickly stood to give your friend a hug. Steve smiled as he returned the gesture, pulling you close and wrapping his warm hands around your frame, inhaling your perfume. Unfortunately, drops of rain from his jacket had now sunk into the thin cardigan that you were wearing, leaving you with cold patches of rain water on your torso.

You made a soft gasp at the chill saying ‘Nooo, Steve! You made me wet!’’ You grimaced, wiping yourself as you sat back down.

Steve burst out laughing at your poor choice of phrasing as he said, ‘Aw doll, I’m sorry! But it’s not every day that I get to spend good time with my favourite!’.

As he began to shrug his jacket off, you thawed at the sound of his words. Steve had always said that you were his ‘favourite’. You remembered the first time he had said it and you scoffed playfully, saying, ‘you don't mean that’.

But his sincere face looking down at you suggested he meant the exact word he chose.

Everything about Steve was earnest and calm. You watched him as he patiently waited for the waitress to come by your table and take his order. You didn't know how, but even the way he asked for his coffee was deliberate but sweet. In the 5 years you had known him, you were convinced that he was a better person each time you saw him.

Steve turned around to catch you staring at him.

‘What’s going on with you, you seem like you have a lot to say y’ know’. He asked, narrowing his eyes playfully with a tilt of his head.

Taking a sip of your coffee, you smiled warmly, ‘Nothing… just reminiscing’.

You both fell into an easy conversation, taking time to ask him about his day and if he had crossed anything off his list of things to discover this week. He began to show you several memes he had thought you'd find funny, laughing more because you snorted into your coffee, leaving a foamy mess on the table.

‘Oh God, Steve, you’re getting better than me, where are you sourcing these from?’ you laughed.

‘C’mon, I’m Captain America, I have to know everything about everything’. He joked back with a wink.

You rolled your eyes in humour, saying ‘Alright hotshot’.

You loved the comfort you had with Steve. Everything was easy and calm. You didn't even have to explain yourself to him. Only sometimes when he looked at you like that. The ‘cap look’ you called it. How could someone so good be so beautiful as well? It seemed unfair. Regardless, you were more than grateful that you were friends. And close ones at that.

‘Anyway’, Steve interrupted your thoughts. ‘You would never ask me to meet you in this kinda weather unless there's something exciting going on’. He continued. ‘Wait… did you finally find the company papers that Brock hid?’

Meeting his gaze, you said, ‘Nah,... I just wanted to see you properly. I only ever see you at work.’

Steve’s heart leapt a little at the thought of you just wanting to see him. How easy would it be for him to have the choice to just see you all the time if you were together.

Reading your downcast eyes, Steve drew a breath in, muttering ‘Where’s Brock these days anyway?’

You looked up at Steve, sighing at his quiet persistence in his blue eyes. Pulling your hands into your sleeves, you said, ‘‘If I knew the answer to that I’d tell you’

Whether you believed it or not, Steve knew you very well. From the way you blew into your coffee subconsciously though it wasn't hot, to the way you bounced your knee when you were nervous.

‘Y/N, c’mon, you know you can tell me.’ He frowned with persistence, not knowing that you really did mean, that you had no clue. Steve continued. ‘Wait, are you serious? Didn't he do this last month?’

‘I dunno’ you replied, staring at the white foam in your cup. ‘He hasn’t been home since last Thursday.’ It was now Saturday.

Steve patiently waited, egging you on as he reached for your hand on the other side of the table.

A few moments passed and with a rush of sudden emotion, you started.

You began to explain how you weren't even sure if Brock was in the city, back from his work meeting in Chicago. It’s as if you knew that he liked to spend more time in the office than he did with you. God knows why someone would choose to live in the office. Despite him being the executive of the start-up company you had helped him create, nothing much kept him there for long.You guessed it was an active avoidance on his part. Or rather… someone was keeping him there. You thought you were going crazy.

….’Every time I’ve tried to call his phone, it gets redirected to his secretary Sharon’. You started to sob, saying ‘I feel so stupid… he treats me like a child and not his partner… and I’ve tried everything but it’s like I'm waiting for the worst...and Steve, I swear I can feel it coming and I don’t know what I should do... I know I heard Sharon stifle her laugh when I called again yesterday’. Tears were now streaming down your face and with a quiet whisper, you finished ‘It’s like everyone is laughing at me’.

Steve immediately frowned, responding ‘No, Y/N, they're not. I’m not laughing at you’. He began to stroke circles into your palm as an attempt to soothe you. ‘I could never’. ‘Unless you’re having a brilliant stroke of luck with your awful jokes’.

With a sobbing inhale, you countered; ‘My jokes are so good and you know that’.

As you exhaled, you began to shiver, not knowing whether it was because the rain had settled on your skin or because the sadness had buried itself in you.

Noticing your shaking shoulders, Steve picked up his jacket on the side, stood and shuffled to your side of the booth. As he placed his jacket over your shivering shoulders, you met his calm blue eyes with yours, quietly murmuring a ‘thanks’.

As Steve snaked his arm around your shoulders, you shuffled closer to his warmth, discreetly inhaling his fresh laundry powder and sandalwood scent. Suddenly, you felt so self aware, heat growing in your face as you realised you had perhaps crossed a boundary. You were still with Brock after all and in that moment, you truly wished you had with him an ounce of what you had with Steve. Maybe if the timing had been right with Steve you could’ve…

Drawing yourself out of your thoughts, you looked up at Steve, as he sipped his coffee, staring through the misted windows

You softly poked his side, asking ‘What’s America’s finest thinking about in there?’

Steve had been secretly seething at the mention of Brock’s name, yet again being the centre of your topics. Not because he was being selfish but because he thought you deserved better… dare he say even him.

For the longest time Steve had desperately wanted you for himself. You understood him and he felt truly seen with you. Something that he struggled with other people when they ‘reduced’ him to just ’Captain America’. Despite his herculean physique and good looks, more often than not, he still felt like the small guy he had tried to shake off all his life.

Whenever he imagined his future, it was impossible to not see you in it. You were what he needed and wanted. He felt he had missed the timing and he wished he had more confidence 4 years ago but then Brock came along and...

Steve snapped his eyes, focusing his gaze as he whispered ‘Nothing, doll… just, thinking’.

‘Oh yeah? What about?’

‘Well… I guess I was just… I was wondering if you’d want to spend the day with me tomorrow? Just me and you?’

Feeling warmer, you replied into the crook of his arm ‘Yeah.. why not. Let’s do it’.

Steve had a plan.

1/3

cont.. very soon

Once again. thanks for making it this far if you have! Let me know if you like what I've written so far / if you'd like to see anything else! Thanks :)

[jd-loves-fiction]

Kiss Cam

➤ Atsumu quickly regrets inviting you and his brother Osamu, whom you’ve been crushing on since highschool, to one his games once the kiss cam lands on the two of you and he has to witness his friend and brother swap spit onscreen.

➤ genre: fluff

➤ wc: 2k

➤ warnings: 

➤ 🌑 I actually don’t know if there are kiss cams in volleyball games but oh well😅

You understood the thought process that led to the situation you would soon have to confront.

You understood why Atsumu did it and why he didn’t think twice about it.

But it really wouldn’t hurt him to learn how to read the room, but more importantly, your tone of clear distress.

“Look, I’m sorry, didn’t think it’d be a problem. And I still kinda ain’t seein’ the problem?” Atsumu said, sounding genuinely confused, which would’ve made you pity him in any other situation because he truly seemed lost, but not in this particular case.

“Ok, you didn’t think it’d be a problem. And now you know it is! Can’t you do anything to change it?” You were practically pleading, pacing back and forth nervously across the length of the stadium’s bathroom.

“I thought ya got over him!” He said, clearly frustrated. “Nothin’ can be done now. Yer just gonna hafta sit with him. Or ya can just go home, if ya want. Wouldn’t hold it against ya.” He spoke over the phone.

Your shoulders dropped. There’s the pity.

“No. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t even be calling you just before the game. I’ll be fine, just focus on winning, alright?” You sighed, defeated.

“’s ok, nothin’ like a lil needless argument to warm up and get the blood pumpin’.” He chuckled, relaxing once more, judging by his voice.

You checked yourself in the mirror again, fixing any stray hairs and wishing you had put more effort into your appearance. If only you had been warned that you'd be sitting next to your highschool crush, Miya Osamu, who you definitely still had feelings for, in the VIP section--

That's enough. No reason to be thinking about that. No time either, as you were already approaching your seat when you came back to your senses.

It had been so long since you'd last seen him. You thought that maybe your memory betrayed you and he wasn't nearly as attractive as you remembered him to be, or perhaps he wouldn't age well. All those possibilities were proven to be completely incorrect the moment you spotted him.

Gone was his warm grey hair, now replaced with his natural black, his shoulders seemed even wider (which didn't seem possible at the time) and he seemed leaner, not at all out of shape but not as filled with muscle as before. It suited him.

You wondered for a moment if he even remembered you (you'd be quite hurt if he didn't) let alone as vividly as you remembered him.

Did he remember you as the shy girl from his class who didn't fall at his brother's feet (and instead fell at his, but he didn't know that) and instead chose to befriend him and find her way into his circle? Did he remember what you looked like? The jokes you made behind Atsumu's back? The lunchboxes shared? How he always seemed to want a pice of yours more than any other, despite the deliciousness of his own? The little game you started where you would try to get him to laugh with the dumbest of methods because you were curious on what his laugh sounded like and why he didn't show it more often?

Did he remember you at all? Sure, those memories seemed significant enough, to you, because you were smitten with him.

He, on the other hand, had a hoard of fangirls waiting on his neck and call much like his brother, and various girlfriends (if the rumors were to be trusted, which they usually weren't, but it had to be true, with everything he had. The body, the face, the personality, the humor).

Sure, him and Atsumu didn't befriend a whole lot of girls, but there were at least a few. Would he confuse you with one of them?

"Y/N?"

Before you could step all over your own heart once more with worst case scenarios, already thinking about turning back and leaving, you heard his low voice call out your name, slow and unsure.

He blinked at you for a moment, wondering if his eye betrayed him, until you waved shyly at him while approaching. His pout immediately turned into a small and soft smile that made your heart flutter.

"Hi! Haven't seen you in a while!" You greeted amicably as you sat down next to him, mentally struggling to come up with topics to discuss. If you remembered correctly, he was never one for small talk, and nothing would be worse than silence right now.

"Right back at ya! How've you been doin'?" He asked politely, still smiling at you. You don't remember seeing him smile for this long (genuinely) before. Oh God, his smile is so cute--

"Oh, nothing much. Looking for a job at the moment." You said dismissively, mentally scolding yourself for making yourself sound so uninteresting. Osamu didn't seem fazed though.

"Well, I'm probably gonna need some help durin' the summer. So, if ya need a part-time job while in Hyogo or something, come by my shop: 'Onigiri Miya'. Sure Tsumu's told ya about it already though, heard y'all kept in touch." He offered, successfully managing to seem calm and collected despite the excitement he felt at the possibility of spending time with you, doing what he loves. That and hide the envy he felt for your having kept in touch with his brother and not him, but then again he could've been the one to reach out so he didn't really blame you.

"Oh! Well I am planning to pass through... Maybe I'll take you up on that offer." You smiled, ignoring how easy it was to talk to Osamu. Who the hell would talk about a summer part-time with their highschool crush after however many years it's been? You two apparently.

But it was nice. Everything about Osamu was nice.

"But honestly, it's real nice to see ya again. Ya look great, I mean it." He said softly, hoping you hadn't noticed the way his eyes had roamed your figure for a moment when he saw you.

You blushed, looking away in response and giving his a meek 'thanks', acting like a highschool girl with a huge crush all over again, but then again, what really had changed?

"You don't look so bad yourself." Was all you managed to say before the game was announced to be starting soon, followed by the fans' loud cheers.

You and Osamu traded comments and jests, poking fun at people in the audience as well as some players (mostly Atsumu), and even though it seemed childish, it made you feel like a highschooler again. Actually it seemed to almost transport you fully onto a very specific day.

You remembered that day quite clearly, for whatever reason. It was during your first year, Osamu had injured himself and had to sit out of a practice match that Inarizaki had against another school. Atsumu (or was it Osamu? You couldn't remember exactly) had asked you to come see the game and "cheer him on". Truth be told, he knew that you wouldn't be doing any of that, and in a way he was glad you wouldn't.

As you entered the gym, you noticed Osamu right away, sitting dejectedly on the sidelines, on the bench, seemingly unbothered and uninterested, but by the grip he had on his shorts and the light tapping of his foot in the floor, you could tell it wasn't so.

The team all knew you by this point, so the coach simply nodded at you as you entered, headed straight to where Osamu sat, eyes wide and glued to the match in front of him, passing in front of him purposely to bring his attention towards you instead.

You placed your bag on the ground before sitting next to it, receiving an odd look from the younger twin.

"Why're ya sittin' on the floor?" He asked as you simply smiled. "Why do you look like you're plotting a murder?" You asked bluntly, to which he gave you a surprised but impressed look, shaking his head and motioning for you to sit with him.

"I'm not. Now come sit with me. Bet it's cold there." He tried tempting your but you merely shook your head, staying where you were.

Reason being that 1. Yes, you were close to most people on the team but you weren't part of it and that's what the bench was for and 2. You had a plan.

"What kind of face do you think that middle blocker's gonna make when Suna spikes?"

"Well..."

You remember making comments about both teams and laughing quietly amongst yourselves, and with where you sat, Osamu had to lean in your direction to hear what you were saying, therefore taking at least a little of his attention away from the game so that he didn't stomp through the floor in restlessness.

The halftime interval was announced finally, each team taking the time to recover some of their strength.

One of the huge screens situated at the edges of the stadium switched on, showcasing a vignette in the shape of a pink heart with the words 'Kiss Cam' at the top, the camera attached settling on two people making them lean towards each other to do as the screen indicated while the crowd cheered.

"Wait. Atsumu told you I was coming? Why? And why didn't he tell me?" Osamu shrugged at your question, seemingly not privy to his brother's thoughts on the matter. Which was a lie.

Atsumu had told him because he knew of his crush on you, and saw this little encounter as the perfect way to 'rekindle the flame' as he put it, as if you were some old couple who were simply bored of each other and not too young adults hopelessly head over heels for the other but unable to make a move.

As you tried to wrap your head around Atsumu's reasoning (useless, knowing him), Osamu took notice of a camera preparing to settle on your position.

Both of your faces appeared onscreen inside the (to some) dreaded pink heart, the crowd cheering once more as you looked around yourself, confused, until Osamu pointed you in the direction of the screen and watched as your face became beet red, before you hid it in your hands.

So that's what Atsumu meant when he told him to 'take any chance to make a move if he got one', the bastard. Osamu glanced briefly at his brother below, looking at his stupid smirk and dumb thumbs up of encouragement. He set this up.

As Osamu turned to you, so pretty, so cute, an image he could never truly erase from his mind fully since highschool, he realized that this was his chance. And he had to just man up and take it. Not repeat the same mistake.

The black haired man placed a gentle hand on the back of your lowered head, ignoring the way the crowd roared louder, and leaned towards you as you raised your head to look at him, being met by his face mere centimeters away from yours.

He looked at you in concern, wanting to make sure that you truly wanted this as much as him.

And you, realizing that fuck it he looked like he wanted it as much as you and you really had nothing to lose, leaned forward to meet him halfway as the crowd's ruckus crescendoed one final time.

The exchange must've lasted maybe a full minute, if that, but it seemed so much longer to you. It seemed like an eternity before you felt his soft, flavoured lips meet yours in a shy kiss, sweet but hesitant. Exactly like two highschoolers would do after confessing.

You parted after a moment, timidly opening to your eyes to check Osamu's expression, only to find him smiling as giddily as you felt inside, hand still steady on your head, simply cupping it and not pushing.

Spurred on by his clear excitement, you leaned back towards him, joining your lips passionately with your eyes closed as the cheering faded from your ears, solely focused on the feeling of Osamu's lips against your own, slow but firm.

As you parted, looking away from each other shyly, you both caught a glimpse of Atsumu, gagging down by the benches.

He was obviously happy for his brother and friend, but he would've preferred to not watch as they locked lips as passionately as they did.

[jaskiers-sweetkiss]

Heartbreak Girl

Pairing: Carrie Wilson x Reader

Word Count: 1.7K

Warnings: some swearing

A/N: This is my submission for Day 1 - Favorite Song for @jatpx5sos week! It’s also my first Carrie fic which I’m really excited about! I dont have just one favorite 5sos song so I chose Heartbreak Girl because it is an absolute bop. Let me know what you think and send me an ask if you want to be added to my taglist! 

Masterlist

___

You couldn’t exactly say you were surprised when you got the text from your best friend informing you that her boyfriend had just broken up with her. You’d seen the signs: their disagreement after the pep assembly, their interactions at the dance, and the way Nick was suddenly very interested in Julie. You knew it was only a matter of time before they broke it off again.

So no, you weren’t surprised when you got Carrie’s text a couple of days after the dance but you were supportive.

You were in your car minutes later, on your way to the grocery store to pick up Carrie’s favorite ice cream and some chocolate. Not long after you were pulling through the security gate before being pulled through the front door, ready to hold your best friend while you ate cookie dough ice cream straight from the container and marathoned all her favorite movies.

“Thank you for coming,” Carrie sniffled once you were safely tucked into the privacy of her bedroom.

“You know I’d do anything for you Car,” you replied honestly, pulling the ice cream out of the grocery bag and handing her one of the spoons you snagged from the kitchen earlier.

You settled down on the bed next to her, handing her the ice cream while taking the tv remote and beginning to flick through the various streaming services.

“What do you want to watch first?” You asked, looking away from the tv for a moment to look over at her.

You didn’t wait for an answer before turning on Mean Girls. Carrie and Nick had been on-again-off-again for long enough for this to become a routine for the two of you. You always started with Mean Girls, and then moved on to the rest of her comfort movies.

You laid back into the pillows after that, tossing a comforting arm around your friend’s shoulder. You stayed that way for the rest of the night, sharing the cookie dough ice cream and a variety of other snacks and occasionally talking.

It was bittersweet, you thought as Carrie laid curled up to your side as you lounged against her pillows, Clueless playing in the background and empty ice cream container long forgotten. On one hand, you were absolutely livid that Nick had broken Carrie’s heart once again but on the other, you couldn’t help the way your heart warmed when you looked down at the girl beside you and the intense desire to never let her go.

Alright so maybe you had a crush on your best friend, but even if it wouldn’t destroy your friendship you couldn’t tell her. She just got dumped and it would be beyond unfair to dump those feelings on her.

She’d fallen asleep sometime during the third movie and she looked so peaceful, no worries about stupid blond-haired boys in her dreams. You didn’t want to wake her up but you had a curfew to make and you knew she’d be pissed if you left without saying anything.

“Car, I have to go,” You whispered, shaking her lightly as the credits for Clueless rolled in the background.

“Please don’t go,” she pouted, wrapping an arm around you in an attempt to keep you there.

“My parents will kill me,” you said apologetically, pulling her arm away from you but holding onto her hand for a moment longer. “But I’ll be by your side all day at school and I can come over right after.”

Carrie nodded, looking up at you from her pillows as you stood from the bed, her hand still in yours.

“Thanks for being such a good friend,” she said sleepily, squeezing your hand before letting go completely.

You felt your heart drop along with her hand at the words but you shook off the disappointment. Your friendship with her was much more important than whatever feelings you might have.

___

As soon as you arrived at school the next day Carrie was glued to your side. As soon as you stepped onto the pavement of the parking lot she was swooping in, slipping her arm around yours.

“Good morning my bestest friend in the whole world,” she said cheerily, a smile plastered on her face.

You could tell it was all for show, however. You could see right through the exaggerated smile and haughty look, you knew her too well and for too long to fall for the persona she’d created for everyone else at school. She was still hurting and if you couldn’t fill the hole Nick had left in her heart then you’d at least do your best to help mend it.

“How’d you sleep?” You asked, using your free hand to sling your backpack over your shoulder.

Carrie shrugged, “Good I guess.”

You nodded silently as you walked arm-in-arm towards the doors. You noticed her hesitate when you reached the threshold of the building, afraid of what might lie inside the doors, but you didn’t say anything, merely turning to give her a reassuring smile before tilting your chin up and walking confidently through the doors. Carrie mimicked your show of strength, pushing her shoulders back and her chin up as she entered the school, fully embodying the appearance of the Queen Bee she’d made herself out to be.

Nothing seemed out of place as you walked through the halls to your lockers, crowds parted to let you through. From the outside, you and Carrie must’ve looked like the picture of poise and you could tell that was reassuring your friend. The façade wasn’t shattered until you were nearing your first class.

Carrie nearly froze when the two of you turned the corner to see Nick walking in the opposite direction. Rather than show weakness, she quickly shook it off, reaching out to lace her fingers through yours, letting your hands hang between you rather than keeping your elbows linked. You squeezed her hand gently as you steered her through the door of your English class and out of the Nick-infested hallways.

The rest of the day proceeded similarly, Carrie holding onto you either through linked arms or linked hands for support, especially if Nick was in the vicinity. The worst was music, the only class you didn’t sit with each other in since Carrie was a vocal student and you were a pianist. Fortunately, though, Mrs. Harrison decided today would be a good day to assign a duet project and you and Carrie were able to partner up. Before you knew it, the final bell was ringing and Carrie was practically dragging you to the parking lot, desperate to get as far away from the school as possible.

“So I was thinking we start with Legally Blonde, and then Bring It On, followed by Mamma Mia,” Carrie rambled off her movie list as you walked arm-in-arm to your cars.

You laughed slightly but nodded.  

“Sounds good.”

You separated briefly and only to drive your cars to her house. Carrie linked your arms once more when you arrived, marching assuredly up the driveway. There was no falsity in the confidence she embodied in her own home, though she now also wore her vulnerability on her sleeve. You felt lucky that she trusted you enough to let her guards down, you got to see a different side of her than pretty much everyone else. Maybe that’s why you fell for her.

The rest of the afternoon and evening went similarly to yesterday, with the two of you snuggled up to each other talking through the movies. You’d both seen them so many times that you could practically recite them from memory.

You took it a step further when you got to Mamma Mia, you having pulled Carrie off the bed when Dancing Queen started. You danced around her room wildly as you sang through the rest of the songs in the movie until you were laughing too hard to breathe and your limbs felt heavy and you collapsed once more onto the bed.

“I wish I had what they have,” Carrie said mournfully as you watched Sam and Donna and Sophie and Sky celebrate their relationships.

“You’ll find it someday,” you said softly, trying to reassure her while also desperately trying not to picture her with someone else. You weren’t sure your heart could take it at that moment.

Carrie scoffed, rolling over to face you. “I’ll never find someone as good for me as you.”

“W-what?”

Carrie peered at you, a mixture of sadness and hope and something else you couldn’t determine.

“I wish I could find someone who’s as good for me as you are,” she repeated, switching up the phrasing as if that’s what you were struggling with, not the fact that this felt like some kind of confession of forbidden love.

“I- well… why not me?” You stuttered out, a burst of bravery you didn’t know you had in you pushing the words out of your mouth. You figured you never would have said it if you hadn’t been so caught off guard by her words.

“Y/N don’t be stupid, you’re not into girls,” Carrie huffed, starting to roll away from you but your arm shot out to grab hers, halting her movements.

“Caroline Wilson I have been in love with you for like two fucking years!”

“You what?!” She practically screeched, jumping up until she was sitting on her knees on the mattress, pulling you up until you were doing the same. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because you had Nick and I couldn’t ruin our friendship,” you shrugged, your words coming out calm despite the pounding of your heart and the butterflies flapping around your stomach.

“I would’ve ditched Nick in a heartbeat if I’d known I could have you,” Carrie confessed and when you looked up she was much closer than you’d remembered. Your lips were mere inches apart,  your noses nearly bumping each other. “Can I?” Carrie breathed out, voice barely audible over the pounding of your heartbeat in your ears.

You’d barely nodded when her lips were on yours, softer than you could’ve ever imagined and tasting slightly of her favorite strawberry lip balm that you’d seen her apply earlier.

“So does that mean you’ll be my girlfriend?” You asked quietly when you finally parted.

“Yes you idiot,” Carrie laughed, her smile the biggest and brightest you’d seen in days and suddenly you were being pulled into another kiss.

Beautiful mood board made by the lovely @bright-molina!!!

___

JATP Taglist: @meangirlsx @morganayennefertyrell @n0wornever

[passable-talent]

could you do a part 2 for your recent zuko imagine? i need to know how everything else pans out!! ❤️

if yall can’t tell im doing som part 2′s tonight!! holla

part 1

“Do you want to go back?” 

The Fire Nation capitol was abuzz in the hours before the invasion was supposed to arrive. Zuko was supposed to be hiding in the bunker, where he wouldn’t be found. You were leaving a military meeting of generals who suddenly cared about your opinion, as odd as that was, but Zuko caught you as you left the palace. 

“What?” You said, caught off guard. 

“Do you want to go back to the avatar?” he asked, and the tone of his voice said that he knew the answer.

And here it was, here was the moment that would change your life. You hated the Fire Nation. You hated keeping up appearances and aiding these old men who wanted nothing but blood from the people of the earth kingdom. You hated being here, away from what felt like the only real friends you’d ever had. Sure, Ty Lee, Mai, Azula, they were your friends, but they weren’t Aang. Katara. Sokka. Toph. 

Here it was, the moment to speak your mind. 

“No.” And you didn’t take it. Your expression hardened. You couldn’t give him reason to doubt your loyalty. 

His grip tightened on your arm and his face got just a bit closer to yours, his voice hushed. 

“I’m not asking you as your prince, I’m asking you as your friend. A fellow former outlaw.” Your eyes widened as you caught onto his implication- he was running away, and offering you the chance to come with him. “Do you want to join the avatar?” 

It was a small nod, but it was a nod. 

“Go to the airfield. Behind the blimps are balloons. All the way on the left, the furthest from the guard shack, there’s a balloon I’ve filled with supplies. Get a pack together and be there before the invasion begins. I’m going to get my uncle and we’ll find you after the eclipse.” Though he spoke fast, and quiet, you caught his words, and raced away. 

In the rush of the preparation, and the evacuation, no one noticed the young prodigy hero of the Fire Nation running not toward the exit of the city but instead the other way, to the mountains behind it. If they did, they didn’t question it- obviously you were instrumental to the plans of the Fire Nation. 

You were what was considered a wild card. 

And yet, Zuko trusted you- in telling you, he admitted that he trusted you not to tell the Fire Nation what he was planning. He knew you wouldn’t blow his cover, and it was clear that he knew you’d come with him. 

As the two of you manned the balloon, he told you that his uncle had escaped, but also that Iroh had known your betrayal was coming. Apparently, the prince had talked about you when visiting the prison. That had to mean something.

“Two firebenders, begging for forgiveness, in one day!” Katara shouted, and you couldn’t bear to look her in the eyes. “Zuko, the one who tried to kill us on multiple occasions, and Y/N, who gained our trust for months before turning on us!” 

“How could you ever expect us to let you join us?”

You did. And you were right- they did. Even if they weren’t quite okay with it. 

Zuko gained their trust thanks to his ability to take a punishment. When they yelled at him, he took it, and didn’t fight back. 

You, on the other hand, your winning trait was your honesty. You sat with them, without Zuko, and explained everything. 

You had always been in love with him. You’d always been loyal to him, but you could use cowardice as a cover to stay out of his path, because to be in his path would lead to betraying Aang. You told them about the way that he won you over in Ba Sing Se, and how you couldn’t bring yourself to fight him. You told them about how much the Fire Nation disgusted you, and how you took the chance to run with Zuko the second you got it. 

As you told them: you wanted to be on their side. But you would always follow Zuko. And now that he was here, too- well, everything worked had out, huh? 

Well, one thing hadn’t worked out. Zuko seemed to keep you more as a friend than a partner, which is what you really wanted, though he had no idea. Toph was being the worst about it. She knew exactly how you felt, and too often either made you miserable through pranks in front of Zuko (one very mud-soaked shirt intended to force you to borrow his clothing still made you seethe), or she stuck too close to someone’s side to make you sit beside him. It was the worst thing on earth.

No, the worst thing on earth was that Zuko was oblivious to it all. It wasn’t like this was unrequited- he’d initiated plenty back in Ba Sing Se! But now you’re both traitors to the Fire Nation again and things are so much different? 

You were frustrated. 

Especially since he was gone, like, all the time, now. First it was Aang, then Sokka, then Katara, and it was like, hey, guys, you all know I have a crush on him, so why are you stealing him all the time?

He made up for it by sparring with you. He did seem to want to spend time with you- like he missed you or something, which was odd, because the two of you had spent every day together all spring and summer, pretty much right up until his little field trips with the rest of the gaang. And yet, at dawn, when none of the rest of them were awake, you and he always went out to the beach and sparred. 

His technique was so interesting to you. You were a prodigy, and he wasn’t, you knew that. But your gift was in the martial arts- you just understood the style that firebending was taught within. He, on the other hand, clearly was influenced by Iroh’s world traveling, using firebending as an extension of his body. You caught him, sometimes, doing things that were clearly from other elements. This one wave of fire was obviously a motion straight out of waterbending. 

But when you asked him about it, he didn’t really have an answer. He could explain the move, but not why he chose to do it- just that it made sense to him. 

That was one thing you loved about him. He wasn’t just a firebender, fire was in his blood. He breathed it, and it breathed back. His fire was raw, and moved with his emotions, with his heartbeat. It was more beautiful, to you, than any of the forms you could do effortlessly, the flying kicks, the spins. His fire was the philosophy, more in his veins than in his mind. 

He knew you were staring, he had to. There was no way he could’ve missed the way you stopped practicing to watch him. And yet he kept going, technique after technique, shirtless as he was, he had to know that he was a spectacle. Self conscious and bashful as he was, Zuko knew he was attractive. The little stunt at Emerald Island with his robe proved that. So he had to know-

Didn’t he?

“How’s Mai?” you asked him suddenly, chewing on your lip like it could make you feel less stupid for asking the question.

“Don’t know,” he said, pausing his motions, “she was really upset, after I broke up with her.” Your eyes widened, surprised. 

“You broke up with her?”

“Yeah, the day I ran off with you to come here.” 

The day I ran off with you.

That had to mean something. 

tag list: @lammello @kittyddandnyla @qquell @caitiff @coldlilheart @sleeping-with-the-fishes @duh-dobrik @dxcter

-🦌 Roe

[dearest-bucky]

One kiss is all it takes (One Shot)

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Requested by @softcobain - Where reader who’s Bucky’s best friend ask him to teach her how to kiss bc she really wants to impress a guy she’s going on a date with? But Bucky is totally in love with her, at first he doesn’t want to but then he agrees.

Words: 3.8K

Warnings: angst, fluff, one first detailed kissing scene lol

A/n: Because tumblr is apparently dumb I can’t tag the sweetheart that requested this, but @softcobain I really hope you like this love! 💕 Guys I got goosebumps while writing this, I hope y’all like it too.

Feedback is greatly appreciated! xx

The door of her small apartment made a small squeaky noise as she pushed it open. She wasn’t all that surprised to find it open, her key once again useless. The only noises in the otherwise quiet apartment were coming from the TV that was left on, some detergent commercial playing in one random channel. She turned on the small lamp next to the couch that she usually used to read at night, and smiled as the figure that was sleeping on her small and uncomfortable couch was illuminated by the soft light.

She crouched down next to him and softly touched his hair, making him stir in his sleep. “Hey sleepyhead, what are you still doing here?”

He opened one eye and when he was met with her face, a small smile crept onto his lips. “Hey, you’re back. Thought I’d wait up for you but apparently I failed at that too.”

She chuckled at his words and patted his cheek lightly. “Don’t worry about it. I’m here now.”

Bucky offered her a shy smile and got up in a sitting position, making space for her to sit on the couch too. “So, how was it?” He asked after she sat next to him.

She remained silent for a moment, as if she was thinking hard about the answer, but there was a smile plastered on her lips and a dreamy look on her eyes that kind of told Bucky everything he wanted to know. The answer, despite it not being said, was shown, written in her every feature. She finally turned her head on the side to face him, and then replied. “It was great. He asked me out again on Friday.” Her smile never faltered, but as she looked at Bucky’s reaction her eyes narrowed a little in curiosity.

He nodded at her words and fixed his stare down, unable to look her in the eye anymore. He cleared his throat once and then without even looking at her again, got up from the couch. “That’s great, if you’re happy then I’m happy too. It’s better if I go back to my apartment now. Good night Y/n.” He didn’t even spare her another glance and left her apartment in a hurry, not even allowing her the time to wish him good night too. He slammed the door closed behind himself harder than he intended to and that made him wince, but he wasn’t about to go back and apologize  for that.

With short but quick steps he arrived at his door on the other side of the hall and when he entered his apartment, without even realizing, he slammed his door shut too. He knew he had no right to be mad at her for going out on a date with somebody else, but he simply couldn’t talk his broken heart down. He’d been head over heels with Y/n for years and now having to see her date someone that wasn’t him, it was damn painful.

How could he even begin to explain what he felt for Y/n? Truth is he didn’t even remember how it all started.

After the Avengers defeated Thanos and Steve went to the past to get his second chance in life, Bucky chose to not stay with the rest of the Avengers at the new Avengers’ compound. Instead, with the help of Sam he bought a small apartment in Brooklyn where he’d been living for the last four years.

Y/n moved in her apartment on the other side of the hall only a couple of months after Bucky. When she was moving her furniture in, Sam, just like the perfect wing man he is, managed to introduce Bucky and Y/n, claiming they’d be neighbors so they needed to know each other if one of them ever ran out of sugar or flour. Bucky had scowled at Sam in annoyance but Y/n had only giggled at the new Captain America’s words and shook Bucky’s hand. “He’s right.” She had told him. “You’ll never know when one could need the help of a superhero.”

He had blushed then, at her words, and a smile had replaced the previous scowl.

That day they had both helped her move in, carrying the heavy boxes and the furniture. After everything had been put inside her new apartment, Sam and Bucky excused themselves and wished her a good night, seeing it was dark outside already. She had thanked them both for their help and when they were on the hall, she called out to Bucky. “Don’t be a stranger.”

He had smiled at her and nodded his head.

Ever since that day they’d spend many more days together, hanging out at each other’s apartments, but mostly at Y/n’s because she, as Bucky put it, had the better couch, despite the fact that it was smaller than his, but he enjoyed sitting close to her and watching movies and eating chinese takeout  almost every night. Eventually those nights became an every night occurrence, and without even realizing, Y/n and Bucky had become best friends, helping each other with everything, relying to each other, taking care of each other whenever one was sick, mostly Y/n. She even managed to help him calm down after a nightmare when he had knocked on her door at 3 am sweating and crying in pain.

In the last four years they had become almost family to each other.

Despite her very friendly nature, Y/n was actually very shy when it came to romantic relations. So whatever feeling Bucky started developing for his neighbor/best friend, he buried deep inside his heart, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable. Because he knew there was no way someone as perfect as her would even like back someone like him.

Now he had to stand by and watch someone else take her out on dates and make her happy, when that could’ve been him.

With a heavy heart Bucky laid down on his bed and closed his eyes, a long sigh escaping his parted lips.

Bucky didn’t see Y/n the entire upcoming week. She was busy with her work and he spent most of the days at the compound, training for the next mission.

Days had been passing slowly and he missed her so much every passing  minute, especially on the evenings when they’d be almost cuddled up next to each other on her couch and binge watching whatever Netflix series was on his “to-watch-list”. He wanted to knock on her door but he couldn’t find it in himself to do so. After all she had started seeing someone now so he didn’t know if she still wanted him to go over.

It was almost 6 pm on a Saturday when he heard the hesitant knocks on the wood of his door and he moved lazily through his apartment to answer it. He was surprised to find Y/n on the other side of it.

She was wearing a nice dress, perfect for the warm weather of May evening and even more perfect for her. She looked absolutely breathtaking, but the almost panicked expression written all over her face made him break out of his stupor sooner than he would’ve wanted.

“Hey, Y/n. What’s up?” He spoke a little awkwardly, not knowing how to act around her anymore. It seemed as if it had been an eternity since the last time he saw her. Usually when she came over, she never knocked and she would always greet Bucky with a hug or a kiss on the cheek, but that seemed like a long time ago, and somewhat an inappropriate thing to do now.

She greeted him with a small smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes and asked him if she could come in.

“Uhmm, yeah yeah, sure.” He said, a little confused, but moved on the side to let her inside his apartment and closed the door again.

He saw her move towards the living room, but she never sat down, standing awkwardly in the middle of the small space between the couch and his coffee table.

“Is everything alright Y/n?” He asked then, unable to bare the silence anymore.

She picked her head up and looked at him, a look Bucky couldn’t quite understand. “I need your help.” She finally spoke. Her voice was unsure, even a little shy when she spoke, but he heard her loud and clear.

“Sure, doll. What can I do for you?” Always the hero. Always trying to help. Always helping.

She remained silent for a moment, as if wanting to organize her thoughts well and then she finally started speaking again. “So you know I’ve been talking to this guy for the past month..” she began and Bucky noticed how she was picking up at the skin of her fingernails, a tick of nervousness he knew she had. He moved closer to her and placed his hands on hers, stopping her assault on the fragile skin that had started to bleed a little already.

“What about him? Is everything okay? Is he bothering you? Do I need to kick his ass?” His mind was running a million miles per minute, thinking of the worst case scenarios, but she only shook her head lightly in response.

“Everything is okay with him. He’s great. It’s just…” She hesitated a little before she continued again. “Last night we went out and at the end of the date he walked me home and when he was saying goodnight he leaned in and wanted to kiss me and I turned away so he ended up kissing me on the cheek.” She explained, blushing a little and Bucky was listening to her every word intently.

“Tonight we’re going out again, to the movies this time and this is the third date and I’m thinking we should kiss, right? But I don’t know.” She concluded and let go of his hands that were holding hers, moving to the couch and finally sitting.

Bucky followed her lead and sat too. “You don’t know what?” He asked. If she were unsure about this guy she shouldn’t feel obligated to kiss him. She didn’t owe him anything. She should know that.

But Y/n surprised him with the next words she spoke. “I don’t know how to kiss.” She said and a crimson red painted her cheeks after the words had left her mouth.

Bucky could only stare at her, a little shocked at the confession and that only made her feel more embarrassed than before. “Forget it, this was a stupid idea.”  She said when he took a moment too long to reply and she tried to get up from the couch, but Bucky finally came to his senses.

“No, please doll.” He spoke softly and she sat down again. “I’m sorry.” He continued. “You took me by surprise, that’s all. I mean, how is it possible that you don’t.. you know.. know? How to kiss?”

The entire situation was embarrassing and awkward and they both were wishing the ground would open and swallow them whole.

Y/n felt her cheeks aflame by the embarrassment she was feeling. She knew it was a crazy idea to come to Bucky about this, but he was her only friend.

Despite the fact that she was 26 years old she was an introvert and she didn’t have many friends. Except for Bucky who was her best friend, she had another childhood friend back in her hometown but she was too far to come and help Y/n with her situation.

Her entire life she had avoided people as much as possible, especially boys and men. She never had a boyfriend in her life and she never even kissed a boy before. That’s why she was in  Bucky’s apartment now, asking him for help.

“I just..” she stuttered a reply. “Never kissed someone, so I don’t know how..” Her words were spoken in an almost hushed whisper, still mortified from the situation at hand.

“Okay, so you need me to…?”

“To teach me how to kiss.” She said matter of factly but she regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. They had sounded better in her head than they did when she said them out loud, but there was no way she could take them back now.

Bucky’s eyes widened at her request but he composed himself quickly. He was a highly trained assassin for God’s sake, he knew how to mask his  emotions, but apparently not around Y/n. “I can’t do that!” He finally exclaimed and he watched her face fall after those words. “I mean, it’s not fair to you.” He was quick to add and Y/n looked back up at him. “It’s your first kiss and it should be with someone you have feelings for. Not with me.”

“But Bucky…” A sound of protest left her lips. Those rosy and pillowy lips that he had wished so many times to kiss and that were now asking him to do so. “I’m going to be so embarrassed when he tries to kiss me again and I just stay there. It will be terrible if I just froze in the spot, you know.” She was trying to reason with him as much as she could. “Please? I kind of like this guy and I don’t wanna look stupid in front of him.”

“Doll. You could never look stupid.” He replied, still not saying anything about her request.

He wanted to give in and kiss her so much, but he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to stop once he started. His heart and his mind were in war at the moment.

“Please Buck?” She tried again. “You know I wouldn’t ask this of you if it wasn’t really important to me.” She pleaded and Bucky knew who won the battle inside of him. How could he refuse those lips that he had dreamed of for several years now? How could he refuse her pretty eyes, giving her that sad puppy dog look he absolutely adored? He simply couldn’t. That’s why he found himself slowly nodding his head in response.

“Okay, okay doll. I’ll help.” He said and she nodded back to him, a small smile forming on her lips. “Just one kiss to show you how it’s done.”

“Okay.” She replied and he let out a long breath at the sight of her looking so hopeful now, and beautiful, always.

They turned their bodies to face each other and Bucky cupped her cheek with his flesh hand. Ever so slowly he started closing the distance between their faces, until their noses were almost touching.

Y/n had closed her eyes and was waiting for him to place his lips on hers, but she could only feel his soft breath tickling her lips, but not touching them.

“Relax, doll.” She heard him say and her shoulders sagged a little, finally free from the tension she’d been holding in. “Just go with it and let it happen.”

She was ready to say something when she finally felt his lips touch hers, so softly she thought she must be dreaming it. With the same softness he started kissing her lips, slowly, gently, just like a breeze touching the leaves on the trees. He slowly coaxed her lips to part and she quickly complied, allowing him to deepen the kiss a little, feeling the kiss a little more. He was caressing her lips with his, happy to finally be able to do so, his flesh hand holding her cheek while the metal one moved to her hair, carding through her silky locks.

Too soon for his liking she ended the kiss, but she didn’t back away from him. Her eyes were hooded and her lips still parted when she whispered his name. “Buck..”

It was all he needed to delve in again for another kiss, this one more passionate. He couldn’t hold back anymore, coaxing her mouth open with his tongue, kissing her lips with a passion that was about to burn him entirely. He had been holding back for too long.

The hand in her hair gripped the locks tightly in between the fingers and he felt her let out a small moan against his mouth at the action, which only spurred him to kiss her more. Tongues hugging each other and teeth clashing with each other, biting and kissing and licking lips, starved for each other.

Her hands had found home in his shirt, bunching the material in her fists as she reciprocated his kiss with everything she had.

They had been so lost in each other, not even considering about stopping, until the phone in her pocket ringed and she whined lowly in Bucky’s mouth in annoyance.

“Forget about it.” He spoke between kisses but the device continued ringing until they were forced to part away from each other. Y/n had an apologetic look in her eyes as she fished the phone out of her pocket and she visibly winced when he saw the name on the screen.

She waited a moment until she fixed her breath before answering. “Hi, Andrew.” She spoke, not looking at Bucky anymore. “Yes, I’m ready. I’ll be down in 5 minutes. Okay.” She hung up the phone and finally looked at Bucky again.

He had an unreadable expression in his face while he was still trying to catch his breath from the mind-blowing kiss they just shared.

“I’m sorry. My date is here, I have to go.” Y/n said and waited for Bucky to say something, anything, but he just nodded his head and got up first from the couch, moving to the front door and opening it for her.

She got up too and walked out of the apartment, unable to say another word to him. When she finally reached the door of her own apartment and was entering it, Bucky finally decided to break the silence.

“You’re a quick learner Y/n. Kiss him like that and he’ll be yours forever.” She wanted to laugh at his words, but she just turned her head back and smiled sadly at him.

“Thanks Buck.” She said before he closed the door and entered his apartment again.

This is it, he thought as he sat back on his couch. The same couch where less than 5 minutes ago he was kissing the woman he loved. He should’ve stopped her. He should’ve said something. Asked her not to go on that stupid date with stupid Andrew. But he didn’t. He couldn’t. Because he was a coward.

Besides, if Y/n felt something for him, after that kiss she sure would’ve said something too. But she didn’t. She just got up and left to go on her date with another man, leaving Bucky behind with swollen lips and a broken heart.

It was less than three hours later that she finally came back. Bucky heard the keys jingle out in the hall and he knew she was back. She was probably coming back home with her date, he thought, but he was shocked to see her open his door and enter his apartment instead.

She seemed hesitant as she walked inside his place, finding Bucky slouched on the couch, a half finished bottle of whiskey in his hand.

“Bucky?” She called his name cautiously and he picked up his head to look at her. The same dress from before, except this time she was wearing a denim jacket over it too. He stared at her for a while, simply admiring her beauty, cursing himself for not being enough for her.

“Are you drunk?” The question left her lips without thinking. She knew he couldn’t get drunk, but when she saw him like that it was the first thing that came to mind.

“You know I can’t get drunk doll.” His reply was court and composed. “How did it go? Where’s your date?” He then asked her, despite the fact that he had no interest in knowing the answer to either of those questions.

She moved to sit on the couch next to him, the same spot he had stolen her breath away with one kiss a couple of hours ago, and she couldn’t think of nothing else except for that kiss. “It was okay.” She spoke mechanically, staring at his face. In her mind she was still kissing him.

“Did you kiss him?” Another question he didn’t want to know the answer of but he couldn’t help but ask it. Her only reply was a nod, but it was enough for Bucky to understand what she meant.

He slouched his head, dejected, broken, not wanting to be near her anymore. He had lost her.

“Yes, I kissed him.” She spoke a second later and Bucky wanted to tell her he understood that from her nod. “But I realized his weren’t the lips I wanted to kiss me, the lips I wanted to kiss.” She added a little breathlessly.

Bucky fixed his eyes on her, this time waiting with curiosity for her to continue. That she did. “I never wanted to go to that date after the most amazing kiss of my life, but I didn’t want to be rude to Andrew, so I thought I’d give him a chance, because he was a really nice guy.” She let out a small breath before she continued to speak again, Bucky patiently and curiously listening to her. “The entire time we were out I was still thinking about a certain set of lips that managed to set me on fire. And I thought to myself, it’s just because it was my first kiss. I’m sure if I kiss Andrew it will be even better, because I like Andrew. So I kissed him, but there was nothing. I was still searching for a different kiss in him. I was still asking to feel another man’s lips on mine.”

The bottle of alcohol he’d been holding in his hands, he placed it carefully on the coffee table before turning his body to the side to fully face her. “Doll, what are you saying?”

She let out a small sigh before answering, looking him dead in the eye. “I’m saying I don’t want to kiss anyone else beside you.” She confessed and it seemed that the world came to a stop.

He moved to get closer to her, this time both of his hands cupping her cheeks, inching their faces so close to each other once again. “Are you sure?” There was a slight tremble in his voice when he asked the question, but there was none in hers as she answered “Absolutely.” before locking her lips to his and kissing him like there was no tomorrow.

Their mouths continued the exploration and their hands found homes in each other’s bodies.

Bucky was so happy he could die. He kept kissing her like his life depended on it and between kisses he managed to speak. “Good, because I’m planning to kiss you for the rest of my life.”

[imaginesandinserts]

Irreverent Pt. 10 - Father Dearest

Title: Irreverent Pt. 10 - Father Dearest Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Reader Rating: R  Words: 2841

Content Warnings: Mentions of suicide

Irreverent Series Masterlist

"That's your dad?"

You were still reeling in shock as you watched Strauss and your father climb up the stairs towards the offices. Spencer, Emily, and Derek were all watching you. You think the question had come from Spencer but with the ringing in your ears, you couldn't be positive.

What was he doing here? Why was he with Strauss? This was supposed to be your place. Away from them. Away from him. So how on earth was he there, chatting with Strauss as if they were old friends. You must not have schooled your face too well, because Emily was asking you if you were okay. Her voice was lost in the din as you watched Strauss knock on Hotch's door and then draw both him and Rossi into the room with your father.

"Hey, hey, Y/N, look at me!" It was Emily again, trying to get your attention. You blinked and tried to focus on her - her voice - hoping it would ground you. She was holding you by your shoulders and she looked really worried. Both Derek and Spencer were right beside her looking equally bewildered by your reaction.

You had to get in there. You had to know why he was here. If he was here it was for nothing good, of that you were absolutely certain. You tried to give Emily a reassuring smile but it might've just been a grimace at best, because she didn't look reassured in the least. It's okay. You'd explain later. Right now you had to get to Hotch's office before he…before he did or said something that was...something. You weren't sure what. But you knew you had to stop him.

Before you knew it, your legs had carried you up the stairs, leaving your team to look at you worriedly. They'd had no choice but to let you go or risk causing a scene.

You knocked quickly but didn't wait for an answer as you normally would, but simply entered Hotch's office. You were being rude. You'd apologize later for your behavior. But not now. Show no weakness. This was your home, your office, your team.

"Agent L/N, may we help you?" Strauss asked, looking annoyed by your sudden interruption. It was against protocol and in her eyes it was insubordination - the worst of the deadly sins as far as she was concerned. Hotch and Rossi both looked at you curiously. It seemed you'd interrupted them in the middle of introductions though of course Rossi recognized your father. Maybe Hotch did too, who knew.

"I'm sorry, Chief Strauss. Please excuse me, I know I've overstepped. Why are you here?" The last part was directed at your father whose schooled poker face revealed nothing. No surprise at your intrusion. He looked at you with the same look he used to give you when you'd asked a particularly stupid question at the dinner table. The look designed to make you feel small and guilty.

"Agent L/N." It was Strauss again. Your father had chosen to ignore your question it seemed. "This is highly irregular, for you to interrupt a closed door meeting that you were not invited to."

"it's alright Erin. My daughter and I haven't seen one another in some time. Curiosity was a skill I ingrained in all my children. She took to it a little too well it seems," he laughed a bit disingenuously, gesturing to the surroundings. He was trying to defuse the situation but you couldn't be sure why yet.

"Actually Erin," he continued, "since you've assured me that this team is the right team for the job, maybe it would be alright if Y/N joined us?" He was asking, but he wasn't really. He had a way of doing that. "Please everyone, sit. Let's not all be so stiff. Darling, come sit by Papa." He motioned you over to him as he made himself comfortable on Hotch's couch. For some reason unknown to you, you followed and sat down on the cushion next to his, leaning just slightly away from him. You tried to revert your face back to neutral but there was no way Hotch and Rossi couldn't sense your complete unease.

Hotch's guard had already been up when Strauss had strolled into his office with the man, whom he now knew to be your father. Now, watching how you held yourself around him and seemed so electrifyingly confrontational, had every single one of his senses on red alert. He met Rossi's eye and knew that the older agent had caught on to the same - not that it was too hard to do, as you had barged in and demanded to know what the man was doing, daring to step foot in Quantico.

"As we were about to say," Strauss continued, looking thoroughly perturbed by your interruption. "Mr. L/N was contacted recently in his capacity as liaison between us and the Eastern Europeans, with some very disturbing news which he felt it imperative to share with us. The Director has already spoken with me about this, but Mr. L/N was contacted by a concerned citizen who has identified the presence of a serial killer who seems to be hunting American citizens up and down the East Coast for the past several decades."

"What about his role makes him the best contact regarding a tip about serial killers." You could've kissed Hotch for seeing through the bullshit. That's what it was. Complete and utter bullshit. Bureaucratic bullshit that you had been trained to see your entire life. Your father leaned closer and put his arm nearest you at the back of the couch, and then moved it down to be around your shoulders. You just wanted to fling yourself across the room and stand next to Hotch. Behind Hotch. Anywhere but seated near this man.

"I am a trusted figure in these communities. Often these people do not trust law enforcement to be on their side." He was trying to explain his job, his duty as he called it. The entire thing was revolting.

"So what do you have for us, then?" It was Rossi who asked this time, fixing your father with a firm look.

"Oh David, it has been such a long time since we last saw one another. Your directness. Always something I've admired." Ugh. He was trying to be charming. Rossi had to see through it.

Strauss chose to be the one to take Rossi's question. "Mr. L/N has compiled a lot of information on this case. I have already passed it along to both Agents Garcia and Jareau and the BAU will be prioritizing this over any other case." Her tone left little room for argument and you knew you were already on thin ice due to your earlier interruption.

Hotch was fuming on the inside. Strauss was dictating which cases his team did for some political agenda. And your father was at the middle of it for some bizarre reason. You seemed frightened. That was a sobering thought for him. He made sure his face revealed nothing as he simply nodded, knowing he would rant to Rossi about this as soon as Strauss was out of earshot.

The wheels in your head were spinning trying to make sense of it. Strauss wanted the team to take a case to hunt down a serial killer that your father had identified. Why? Who was this man? Why was your father trying to get him caught?

"Darling, why don't we let Agents Hotchner and David here get started and you can join me for dinner?" He was asking you to share a meal with him. Un-fucking-believable.

"Oh Papa, you know I would love to. But as you and Chief Strauss have emphasized, this case is of the utmost importance. I'm sure the whole team will be brought in and we will probably have to fly out tonight." You looked to Hotch for confirmation and he nodded.

"Yes, sir. Agent L/N is correct. We'll be bringing in the whole team and starting right away." Oh that perfect, smart, beautiful man. He was about to get free babysitting for Jack for life.

"Well, in that case, I suppose I'll leave you to it. Chief Strauss, thank you. Agents. Y/N, escort your Papa back to the elevators at the very least and perhaps the two of us can plan something for when you've wrapped up this little nuisance." You wanted to refuse but of course you couldn't. You faked a smile, and as he shook everyone's hands and exited the room, he pulled you in closer, tucking your hand into the crook of his elbow as you walked out together, with Strauss at your heels.

"So, that was Y/N's dad," Hotch found himself feeling a mixture of revulsion and pity as he watched the man force you to walk him to the elevators. Your posture was stiff the entire way.

"Yes, however I've never seen him with Y/N before," Rossi confided as the two of them started to dig into the files that Strauss had left on Hotch's desk.

"Did she seem-"

"Scared?"

Hotch nodded grimly.

"Yes."

*------------*

As the elevator doors closed, hiding his face from view, you knew you had to face the team again. They were bound to have questions. You just weren't sure how honest you were prepared to be with them quite yet.

As you turned to walk back, you saw Rossi summoning everyone to the conference room. He was waiting for you outside, after having ushered everyone else in.

"You okay kiddo?" Rossi actually looked really worried, and you reminded yourself that this was a man who might actually have some idea of who your father truly was.

"Not even in the slightest." You let out a breath that you had likely been holding since you'd heard his voice again.

"Alright, come on in then. We might as well all talk it out," he said, urging you in to join the rest of the team. They all look so worried. Emily made eye contact and you could physically feel her suppressing a what-the-fuck-was-that-y/n? You couldn't look at her too long - any of them. You turned to look at Hotch standing at the head of the table. He still looked calm. A little worried, but he was maintaining the calm overlay and that helped. Hotch was here. Hotch could handle anything.

You knew they were all waiting for you to go first. It seemed Garcia and JJ had filled everyone else in while you'd been in Hotch's office, as they all had a copy of the case file in front of them. You took a deep breath, bracing yourself, not quite knowing what was about to come out of your mouth.

"So…that was my father." You looked around, trying in vain to maybe just laugh it off, but they all looked so concerned still. This was mortifying.

Steeling yourself, you decided to just go for it. "Look, Hotch, whatever he says, whatever he does, don't trust him. This case, there's no way he just came across someone who handed him a file on a serial killer we knew nothing about. Isn't that suspicious to anyone? How did he possibly convince Strauss and the Director!" You had blurted out more than you'd actually meant to. You must look crazy.

They were all suspiciously quiet. It appeared they were deferring to Hotch and Rossi.

"Y/N," Hotch's voice was soft and cajoling, your name always sounded so nice in his mouth. "Why are you afraid of your father?"

Of course he'd pick up on that. You released another deep breath. You could hear the wall clock ticking as they all looked at you still. "My father is not a good man," you began, stifling the part of you screaming at you to trust no one. "Rossi, you know him. You know his reputation. He's not like your mom, Em. He's not an ambassador like her. He makes shady backroom deals and he's a liaison which is really just code for government-approved mob bosses. If he wants something from us, it's part of a larger plan and we won't know what it is until we're in too deep."

You hadn't realized you were shaking as badly as you were, but JJ had come around the table to sit next to you and her warm hand was truly the only thing keeping you mentally in the room instead of in a dark room inside your mind, screaming your head off.

"Okay, but Y/N, that doesn't answer my question. Why are you afraid of him?"

You had to just get it out. They would believe you, even if no one else would.

"I don't know if you guys know this, but I have two older brothers," you started to disclose.

"Yes, older one is Dominic - he works under your father. Your younger brother, the middle child, Julian, is deceased - mugging victim." Reid's recall from your background file sure came in handy.

"Yeah," you gave Spencer a shaky smile for filling in some of the details. You weren't sure how you were going to get this out entirely. JJ's hand was still clasped in yours and Hotch's brow was furrowed in worry, his lips a thin line. "I can't prove this," you said, shaking your head a bit, "but I'm confident that my father had Julian killed."

Penelope gasped, barely audibly.

"Y/N, sweetheart," JJ's voice broke out into the silence. "Why would you think that?"

"Julian was - he was not who my father expected a son of his to be. My father is a traditional man, and he cannot stand anyone contradicting him. Going against what he's ordered them to do. In my last year at Harvard, Julian was seeing someone. He had told me around the holidays and was going to introduce us at graduation. He died the month before. At graduation, a close friend - someone who has been around for me and my family since before I was born - confided in me that he suspected that Julian's death was not a suicide. You see, my father had a business deal he wanted to seal and he was pressuring Julian to date this girl while Julian was in his other relationship."

"Your brother was gay," Rossi asked but it wasn't a question. They all knew by the way you'd described your father.

"Yes. But I didn't know. Like I said, old school, traditional family with a reputation to hold. I only found out afterwards because my friend had Julian's journal from his final days. In it he was going to go public with his relationship and wrote about an argument he had had with my father when he refused to date that girl to seal the deal. My father knew then that Julian was gay."

"But, you really think he would kill his own son?" Derek was standing now, the incredulity evident on his face.

"I know he did. In his final days Julian was scared. My father has a lot of contacts that are seedy at best. Hiring a hit to avoid the embarrassment to the family of having a gay son - that is something that he would do. I grew up with the man, and there isn't a doubt in my mind that he's capable of it."

"Y/N," Emily had finally spoken. She looked at you and you knew that she wanted to believe you but her inner investigator needed more. "Is it possible that Julian committed suicide?"

"Yeah, it is," you admitted. "In which case my father drove him to it and then made it seem like a mugging to avoid the embarrassment of a gay son who committed suicide."

JJ's touch was reminding you too much of how good of a person she was and the crap family that you were associated with. You withdrew your hand from hers and stood to go lean against the wall as they all processed everything you'd revealed. Penelope brought over a glass of water for you and made sure you drank it, petting your hair to help calm you down. You hadn't realized you were still trembling.

After a few minutes, it appeared Rossi and Hotch had come to some sort of nonverbal decision, because Hotch had walked over to stand in front of you. You looked up to meet his eyes - his warm brown eyes which seemed lit with fire - rage and anger on your behalf. "Okay, then we'll work the case. But there's two cases. One is the case we've been handed. The other is figuring out why."

His declaration was directed just at you but it was obviously meant for the whole team. As you looked around the room, you could tell there were people in here who believed you with no proof at all. They'd simply accepted that he was evil and there was a larger plot afoot, just because you'd said so. All they'd needed was your word.

[mable-stitchpunk]

Tag Along

“This thing reeks.”

“Yeah, I smell it too.”

“...Let’s go see if he can smell it too.”

Andrew had an especially mischievous tone in his voice. Jake was a little less amused by the idea, but he did agree in showing it to their friend. If anyone would know what this little bear was, and why it had a speaker in its chest, he would.

It was just another toy found in the garbage, but this one seemed a little special somehow. Though they hadn’t noticed until they brought it back to the warehouse. It was a small teddy bear soaked in nasty smelling water and spilling moldy cotton out of tears in its body. The metal speaker in its belly showed that it was more than a simple toy though.

The Stitchwraith walked to the back of the warehouse where they found their friend waiting like he always was. They showed the torn-up toy to the much more intact, but equally old, plush toy. Showing no expression, like he usually didn’t, he emphasized his feelings through voice alone.

“Ugh. Where did you find that thing?”

“We just bought it from a toy store. Where do you think we got it? The dump.”

“Looks like it should’ve stayed there,” he quipped with disgust. “Looooks like a Tag-Along Freddy.”

“So, you know what this is.” “...THIS is a Tag-Along Freddy?!”

There was a pause as the two voices quieted to process what each other said.

“Wait, you know what this is too?” Jake asked in surprise. “Why didn’t you say something earlier?”

“I’ve never seen one or anything, I just heard about them. Get this: there was this kid who had one and it told him to jump off a cliff, and he did.”

There was a doubtful pause between half of the Stitchwraith and the haunted plush.

“Trust me, it happened. It’s a long story.”

“O-kay... So, what’s a Tag-Along Freddy? Just some sort of toy that talks?” Jake asked the plush, more confident in his answers.

“They were just little dolls that lazy parents gave their kids to babysit them. They could talk and had a little camera in them to tattle on what they did. They were connected with those security bracelet things- ask me sometime to tell you about the Puppet. I don’t feel like it now.”

“They just left this to watch their kids?” Jake lifted up the rancid doll and stared at it with scrutiny. It didn’t look like it would be much of a babysitter, even if it was just supposed to sit in a room and record a child’s movements. “Huh... Okay.”

“Until it all went wrong,” Andrew began in a theatrically cryptic voice. 

“Andrew...”

“Come on. You know you want to hear this.”

Jake expected that he wasn’t going to believe the story and from their friend’s groan it didn’t seem like he was looking forward to it either... Though Andrew was right in the sense that he was curious. He caved. “What’s the story?”

“Once there was this kid who got the Tag-Along Freddy doll. He loved this doll and took it everywhere with him, but then one day he disappeared. They looked for him all over but couldn’t find him. Days later, they found the Freddy at the bottom of the cliffs outside of town and when they checked the recordings they could hear Freddy telling the kid to jump off the cliff- and he did!... But they never found the body. All that was left was the doll, and that final recording telling him to jump.”

“Oh...” Jake wasn’t sure if he believed it. Their friend was surprisingly silent.

“But the weirdest part? The recording wasn’t in Freddy’s voice...” Andrew’s arm took the bear from Jake’s and raised it up, slowly inching it towards their shared mask. “It was in the voice... Of his dead grandmother...” The doll sat in front of their view to emphasize the reveal. It was followed by a long pause. “...Or maybe his dead dad. Or mom. I can’t remember who, it was just someone dead.”

“That still doesn’t explain why he would jump. I loved my dad, but I don’t think I would’ve jumped off a cliff unless there was something at the bottom to catch me,” Jake rationalized.

“It’s because little kids are too dumb to think for themselves. They’d throw themselves off a cliff for a piece of candy- or go with a stranger as long as he was dressed up like their favorite character. They’re worthless.”

That tone took both sides of the Stitchwraith completely off-guard. It was so cold and aggressive, like it was actually offended by the story. Then a strange feeling of twitching heat started to spread through their body and Jake realized that this was not going to go well.

“Maybe if some of those lazy parents were watching their kids, they wouldn’t get a chance to go wandering off with strangers. Or maybe they’d no not to go do stupid things. It’s not the kids’ fault, it’s their worthless parents’,” Andrew hissed. It was clear that he was only barely holding back his feelings. 

Now, at this point Jake knew exactly why Andrew was upset, what with his past. Unfortunately, this past had not been related to their third friend, who seemed almost oblivious to the shift in mood, and he kept digging that hole.

“I’m not going to argue with you. Parents who think that a little, tiny doll is going to protect their kids deserve to have their kids taken away, but the kids always walk into it. They always walk away and leave themselves open to whatever’s out there. They walk themselves off the cliff because they’re too stupid to look down.”

“I think you’re stupid,” Andrew said unwittingly. This must’ve caught their friend off-guard because normally he would’ve pounced on a comment that childish. Andrew followed up quickly, “If you’re going to say some little kid is responsible for itself at all then you’re either a complete idiot or you’ve never seen or been a kid.”

“Guys,” Jake warned.

“You just told me that lame story about the kid jumping off a cliff because his toy told him to. You can’t act like that’s a smart kid. That’s an especially dense kid.”

“That’s like a three year old! What do you expect?!” Andrew lashed out. “How are they supposed to know better?! It’s a talking toy! Those kids still believe in Santa Claus, of course they’re going to trust a toy!”

”But they don’t just trust toys, do they? They trust anything offering to butter them up with candy. They’re greedy, they’ll go with a stranger in a heartbeat and then wonder why oh why it hurts so badly when they do.”

“What- Where- Where did that even COME from?! You’re talking about kidnapped kids- Are you really going to sit there and tell me it’s not the maniac who kidnapped them’s fault, but it’s the kids’ fault they died?!”

The Stitchwraith now stood dangerously tall over the unseeing plush toy. Its body, especially its one arm, were twitching violently as it stared down in half-hearted anger. The plush didn’t move, but it decided to answer.

For some reason he chose the worst possible answer.

“...Yes.”

The Stitchwraith shrieked and Andrew reached for the toy, only for his arm to get caught by Jake, who forcibly turned their body away from the doll. He desperately tried to defuse the situation.

“Would you guys stop? It’s just a story! It’s not even real!” Jake protested. “Andrew, please-!”

Suddenly Andrew got control and turned them around, snatching up the doll and hoisting it up threateningly. His fingers dug into his neck. 

“TAKE THAT BACK!” Andrew yelled. He shook the doll aggressively. “TAKE IT BACK, NOW!”

“I think you’re taking this a little too personally. I didn’t say you were stupid. You said I was stupid.”

“YOU ARE!” 

“Guys, would you two just stop?!” Jake yelled. He began to fight Andrew for the plush again. “Andrew, he’s not talking about you! He doesn’t know about what happened!”

“...This whole thing wasn’t a long way of telling me that you were the kid that jumped off the cliff, was it? Because if it was, whoops.”

Andrew gave another frustrated cry and threw the plush down on the shelf. He turned his back on it and tightly balled his fist- as much as he could- in steaming anger. Jake patted his arm comfortingly, silently assuring him that he did the right thing. Then, after a moment to calm, he turned his head and spoke.

“You shouldn’t say things like that. You don’t understand what those kids go through... That’s what happened to Andrew.”

“Ugh, just don’t...” Andrew hissed. 

“It wasn’t his fault that he was attacked. That wasn’t any of those kids’ fault. Even if they knew better, who’s to say they could’ve stopped it?”

There was a long and very uncomfortable pause. Andrew ran his hand over his side of the mask as Jake stood there awkwardly, feeling the tension in the room. When all of a sudden-

“Was it a man in a rabbit suit?”

The question took them both off guard. The Stitchwraith looked back at the doll, laying on its side with its back facing them. It hadn’t budged from where it had fallen, as expected. Though that was the only thing expected by the moment.

“...Uh...” Jake started awkwardly.

“No,” Andrew said suspiciously. “...Why?”

There was a long moment of silence where they waited for an answer that never came. Instead, the voice from the plush suddenly changed tone.

“I’m sorry, Andy. You know I don’t think you’re stupid, or that it’s your fault you’re. If it makes you feel any better, I don’t think you’d ever walk off a cliff on purpose,” he assured soothingly, as though talking down a wild animal. “...I just get mad sometimes.”

“Mad?”

“At things. Maybe I say things I shouldn’t. When you’re stuck in a little toy like I am, sometimes you don’t have much control over what you say. It just comes out, but I shouldn’t take it out on you. You two are my best friends. I don’t think you’re stupid, I think you’re both fascinating.”

Jake could feel Andrew calming down a little, but could tell that he was still upset. Which was probably why he kept trying to pull their body’s gaze away from the toy.

“Forgive me?”

Now on the spot, less than amused by the pleading tone, Andrew gave a huff- which came out of the Stitchwraith sounding more like sizzling.

“Whatever,” he snapped. He then looked down at the bear on the floor and picked it up. “Jake, can we do something about this thing? I’m tired of looking at it.”

“Sure. Let’s just go put it on the shelf with the others.”

Both were glad to get an excuse to walk away from the toy, leaving it to sit there silently in the corner. They headed to their specific shelf for plush toys and laid it down amongst the others, staring at it for a long moment. The lifeless bear stared back blankly. Something about it now made them both uncomfortable in a new way.

“Hey, Andrew?” Jake asked quietly.

“Yeah?”

“It was a toy telephone and his dead grandmother told him to drown himself in the pool.”

Andrew paused a long moment before asking in incredulously, “THAT’S his story? Geez, no wonder he’s mad.”

“No, not that. It’s an episode of Twilight Zone. Ring any bells?”

“Oh...” A long moment of realization washed over him. “...Maybe I don’t remember things as good as I used to.”

“Yeah, maybe,” Jake said with a touch of good-natured amusement in his voice. “You good?”

“Just peachy. Let’s never talk about this again.”

They never did.

[daringyounggrayson]

written for the lovely @aeligsido as part of a gift exchange!

Summary: After an argument with Bruce, Dick retaliates by running off to a not-so-safe part of Gotham. During his misadventure, he drinks a slushie, stops an attempted robbery, and lands himself in someone else’s trunk. He can’t exactly say that his current situation is a surprise, but that doesn’t mean getting out of it is going to be a piece of cake. Especially when he has a head injury working against him.

oOo

In retrospect, Dick made a lot of stupid decisions tonight.

The first stupid decision had been starting up the concert argument again which, at this point, is a losing battle that isn’t really about a concert anymore. Dick still doesn’t understand how going on a mission in space isn’t a big deal but going to a concert with a few friends who happen to be in college is. Especially since Dick met the “college kids” when they were all still in high school together. And, besides, a couple of the people he went on the space mission with are the same age as the aforementioned college kids.

Dick didn’t—doesn’t—even care about the concert that much; he’s annoyed that Bruce is being a controlling hypocrite and treating Dick like a child. He’s annoyed that after all these years of continuously proving himself to Bruce, the man still doesn’t trust him.

So what did Dick do to show Bruce why he should trust him? A series of stupid, stupid things that served the sole purpose of making Bruce angry. And to make it worse, Dick knew how stupid they were and chose to do them anyway. He knew he was being stupid when he left his phone at home, and he knew he was being stupid when he ignored Bruce’s use of Dick’s full name as he left the grounds. He knew he was being stupid when he immediately drove to a not-so-safe part of Gotham just so he could rub it in Bruce’s face later.

The point is, Dick knows it won’t be fun when he eventually has to face Bruce’s wrath and whatever punishment is waiting for him the second he gets home—but Dick doesn’t care. Right now, Bruce is an ass and Dick finally has some space to think, to breathe. Plus, just by sitting outside this gas station and drinking a cherry slushie at eleven o’clock at night, in perfect view of a security camera no less, he knows he’s making Bruce furious. That part’s fun. So is thinking about how Bruce is probably watching him from said security camera, fuming and trying to figure out how to handle the situation he’s found himself in. It’s almost worth the inevitable grounding. (Almost.)

It stays fun right up until Dick notices two guys walking into the gas station, hiding their faces. Dick watches them carefully, still sipping his slushie and doing his best to seem innocuous. The second they pull out guns, Dick runs in, wishing he’d brought his phone with him so he could’ve called the police first. Wishing he’d brought a mask so he could’ve had more options.

But, stupid mistakes already made, he only has one option: get their attention and disarm them.

What happens after entering the gas station is kind of a blur. He remembers getting their attention, and he remembers emptying bullets onto the floor, so he must have disarmed them. But he’s not sure how quickly or efficiently he’d done that; he’d heard gunshots, he’s sure of that much, but he doesn’t remember if anyone had been hit.

He also remembers that he’d been recognized as Bruce Wayne’s kid at some point, and the situation had quickly shifted from a robbery/mugging to a kidnapping. Dick remembers trying to resist, and he’s pretty sure he broke someone’s nose in the process. The last thing he’s sure about is being pinned to the ground. He can’t remember which goon had done that, but before Dick could so much as think about getting out of the hold, they’d slammed his head against the ground hard enough to knock him unconscious for a second, hard enough to disorient him long enough to shove him in a trunk.

Now, in the trunk, Dick realizes another stupid decision he’d made: he didn’t bring his Robin belt with him and now getting out of this isn’t going to be a piece of cake.

What feels like fifteen minutes later, Dick’s tied to a chair in some car repair shop with a skull-splitting headache. His situation isn’t exactly ideal, but he knows that if it comes down to it, he’ll be able to get out of this—he’s Robin the Boy Wonder after all. It just won’t be easy, and his odds of coming out of it unscathed aren’t exactly low. Especially since the two men have guns again and Dick’s pretty sure his head is already bleeding.

The more Dick thinks about it, the more he hopes that Bruce had been watching him on that security camera.

“Alright, kid, what’s daddy’s number?”

Dick tilts his head up to look at the guy holding the phone, trying to figure out why he wants a dead man’s phone num—oh. Bruce. He means Bruce.

Dick doesn’t usually have to type Bruce’s number. It’s not often that he calls Bruce, and when he does, it’s almost always on his cellphone, so Dick just dials from his contacts. He knows the number by heart anyway though. It’s just that the pounding in his head—the one that’s getting worse the more he tries to focus—is making it hard to think; it’s making it take longer to access the information Dick knows is there.

“Uh,” Dick starts, trying to recall the numbers and what order they go in. But then again, is it even worth it? Will Bruce answer a call from an unknown number? And what time is it? The odds of him answering drop significantly if he’s already on patrol. Maybe Dick should call Alfred instead.

Impatient, phone-guy kicks Dick’s chair, sending him back a few inches with a screech. Dick blinks as the world spins and his stomach threatens to give up his slushie.

“Come on! I’m not asking again.”

“Chill, man,” the other guy cuts in, voice sounding slightly off and distorted. He has dried blood on his face and his nose looks crooked.

Huh, Dick thinks, guess I did break someone’s nose.

“You chill.”

Another kick to the chair, and this time it forces a mouthful of cherry slushie into his mouth. Dick grimaces as he forces it back down, squeezing his eyes shut as someone yells at him and tugs his head back by his hair.

Dick rattles off Bruce’s number, hoping that he’ll answer so Dick can go home and forget about all of his stupid, stupid decisions. Maybe Bruce will even take pity on him and forgo the lecture and grounding—not that Dick will be leaving the house any time soon if this headache is an indication of anything.

A phone is shoved against his ear and Dick flinches at the contact, snapping his eyes open and looking around.

“Dick? Are you alright?” Bruce is asking, voice controlled but urgent.

“Where are you?” Dick asks.

“I’m on my way,” Bruce says. “Everything will be alright, I promise.”

Dick doesn’t feel alright; maybe Bruce hadn’t been watching the cameras. “Did you see me?”

“Wha—”

The phone is gone and the lights shut off.

“Shit, shit, shit,” nose-guy rambles, voice higher than before as he slaps his hand over Dick’s mouth. Dick twists his head to try to get out of the man’s grip but it doesn’t work.

“Shut up,” phone-guy hisses. “Do you want to get caught?”

“Come out with your hands up!”

Dick’s first thought is a sarcastic guess the GCPD isn’t completely useless, and his second is one of relief. The third is that he should probably help them out, so he starts shouting behind the hand covering his mouth and kicking his legs against the chair, trying to create as much noise as possible.

“Shit, shit, shit,” nose-guy repeats, working himself into a conniption. “What do we do?”

“Would you pull it together,” phone-guy hisses, simultaneously slapping his hand over nose-guy and trying to still Dick’s legs. “Kid, if you don’t chill out, I’ll put a bullet in your head.”

Dick knows a bluff when he hears one, and Dick also knows this guy knows he’s about to get caught and doesn’t want to add murder to his list of charges. So Dick keeps yelling, and—shocker—his head stays bullet-free.

Not even a minute later, a flashlight dances across Dick’s face, forcing him to squeeze his eyes shut. When he opens them again, he can make out two police officers, both wielding guns and flashlights.

The one yells, “Hands up—now!”

The hand is gone from Dick’s mouth and his legs are no longer being held down.

“Okay. Keep them up and step away from the kid. Nice and slow.”

The other officer moves to Dick’s side, immediately going to untie the ropes. “You alright, kid?”

“Yeah,” Dick says, moving his arms in front of him and rubbing at his wrist once the ropes are gone. The officer presses something—gauze, probably—against Dick’s still bleeding head. He winces, holding back a hiss. “Aside from my head.”

“Sorry about that. EMTs are on their way,” the officer assures, keeping a straight face and not giving any indication of how bad the injury is. “Can you tell me your name?”

“Richard Grayson,” Dick says. Instead of looking at the officer, Dick watches as the wanna-be kidnappers are led out of the car repair shop in handcuffs.

“Alright, Richard, while we wait for medical to get down here, how about we call your parents and let them know you’re okay, yeah?”

Dick nods and rattles off Bruce’s number.

oOo

Dick’s would-be kidnappers were some of the worst he’s ever seen, and as Robin, he’s seen quite a few. They barely had him for thirty minutes, and that includes the time spent at the gas station. Their license plates got called in twice: once from the store clerk who found their license plate by checking the security footage, and a second time when Dick kicked out one of the car’s taillights and someone behind them saw Dick’s hand sticking out. And then—this part still makes Dick laugh—they just parked the car right in front of their so-called hideout. The hideout belonged to a friend, but they forgot about the silent alarm, so when they tripped it and didn’t key in the code to turn it off, the police were alerted a third time.

Bruce was probably tracking their call, too, but it wasn’t necessary because the police showed up at the car repair shop five minutes after Dick and his kidnappers did. Dick was almost embarrassed about getting knocked in the head by one of them, but he felt a little better when he found out that both of them were on their high school’s wrestling team—or at least, the EMT who apparently went to high school with them had been pretty sure.

“Richard’s right over here.”

Dick peels his arm off his face and opens his eyes when he hears the nurse. The curtain is pulled back and Bruce is standing there. The amount of relief Dick feels just by seeing Bruce is something he won’t admit to. It almost feels like that time he’d lost his mom at a craft store as a kid, specifically the moment when they’d found each other again and she’d pulled him into her arms. She’d been just as relieved as Dick, so much that she hadn’t berated him at all for running off. She’d just held him close and whispered Dick, thank god while pressing kisses into his hair.

“Dick, thank god.” Bruce looks like he’s experiencing a similar feeling, albeit the flipped version, the one his mom had felt. Or something close to it. Then, to the nurse, “Thank you.”

“Hey,” Dick says, quirking his lips into a small, brief smile.

Bruce’s brows furrow, looking Dick over and lingering on the bandage over his head where he’d needed stitches. Bruce is rigid, uncertain. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay, Bruce, honest,” Dick tries to assure. He sits up, moving his hand to reach for Bruce. Before he can complete the action, Bruce tugs him into a tight hug and it’s not until that moment that something in Dick’s chest unravels and he realizes he’s okay.

Bruce pulls back for a moment, scanning Dick’s face and looking like he wants to say something. He doesn’t. Just brushes Dick’s hair back before pressing a kiss against his forehead. Then he pulls Dick back into the hug, resting his cheek against the side of Dick’s head that’s still intact.

“Are you mad?” The evening started with a fight, one that hadn’t really been finished, and if Dick hadn’t left just to piss Bruce off, none of this would have happened. Though, the look on Bruce’s face and the heaviness on his shoulders tells Dick that he doesn’t care about that right now.

“I’m just glad you’re safe.” Dick holds his breath, waiting for the inevitable addendum. “We can talk about this when you’re feeling better.”

So, no punishment, but the conversation—the argument—isn’t over.

Dick scowls but, for whatever reason, he doesn’t pull away from Bruce’s hold.

Bruce shifts to sit beside Dick on the bed, keeping one arm wrapped around Dick’s shoulder in a side hug. Dick rests his head against Bruce’s shoulder, and Bruce presses a kiss into Dick’s hair. Dick doesn’t mind.

“Tired?” Bruce asks after a while.

Dick nods.

“Get some sleep. We’ll likely be here for a few hours.”

Dick groans. “Why can’t we just go home? I feel fine.” Well, relatively.

Bruce squeezes Dick’s shoulder. “According to your doctor, you have a concussion and likely a linear skull fracture. I doubt they will be discharging you anytime soon.”

“Yeah, but can’t you Brucie Wayne us out of this?”

“Not this time, chum.” Dick can’t see Bruce’s face from this angle, but his voice sounds like he’s frowning.

As much as Dick wants to argue his way out of the ER, he also wants to lie down again. His headache is getting worse and so is the nausea. He already threw up once and it’s not exactly something he wants to have happen again. Especially since Dick’s cherry slushie turned the vomit red, which understandably concerned the medical staff.

Dick sighs and lifts his head, and Bruce mirrors the action by pulling away and standing up. Dick lies down and Bruce hesitates before moving to a chair. Dick reaches to grab Bruce’s hand, which Bruce accepts immediately.

They’re quiet, Dick dozing for a while until the doctor comes back with the CT results, confirming both the concussion and the linear skull fracture. The good news is that Dick will live, the bad news is that he has to stay put for a few hours so they can observe him and make sure nothing goes wrong. He supposes it could’ve been worse, though; Bruce reminds him that they could’ve admitted Dick and kept him overnight.

Bruce calls Alfred to give him the update after the doctor leaves. Alfred didn’t come along because Barbara had already left for patrol and he didn’t like the idea of her being on her own and not having anyone to assist her via comms as needed. It had been the right decision, but when Bruce hands Dick the phone to talk to Alfred, Dick hears concern and worry and guilt in the man’s voice. It hadn’t been easy for Alfred to refrain from running to Dick’s bedside tonight, and he’s sure Alfred will hover for the next few days, but Dick won’t mind.

The phone call ends with Alfred passing on well-wishes from Babs and an exchange of I love yous between Alfred and Dick. Alfred lets Dick hang up first, and then it’s just Dick and Bruce once more.

Bruce not exactly being the best conversationalist and Dick being very much concussed, Dick decides to sleep some more. But before Dick falls asleep, Bruce’s chair shifts.

Leaning closer to Dick, Bruce murmurs, “I’m … I do trust you, Dick. And I’m proud of you—every day.”

They had exchanged a lot of hurtful words during their argument, but right now, none of them feel true. Not what Dick had said, and not what Bruce had said or hadn’t said. Funny how a crisis can make everything else feel so small and insignificant, if even for a moment.

“I know, B.” Dick reaches blindly for Bruce’s hand, squeezing it when he finds it. “Love you too.”

[quinntheebrain]

Two Wrongs pt. 2

Hi! After 10 long years I finally finished the second part. I was little scared to post because I don’t know how much you all will like it (regardless of how much I do). But I hope you enjoy. *goes into hiding*

Warnings: 18+, porn with a plot????????? 

Word count: 9,458 (a little longer than I expected)

It would’ve been wise to listen to your conscience, but you ignored it for the sake of preserving your fantasy. Instead of making the smart decision to leave the Aizawa’s residence without looking back, you spent the weekend playing house with Shouta and his children. For a few moments, they all felt like they belonged to you: the man, the kids, the house. Unfortunately, that moment passed. In an instant, everything in your grasp was ripped away, leaving you with nothing more than obsessive, unrequited, thoughts. 

When Mrs. Aizawa waltzed through the door with a smile on her face, still on a high from the weekend she had, the reality of your situation came crashing down on you. You allowed yourself to play into pleasure and sleep with a married man. A man whose wife had been kind enough to employ you and pay you more than required for your services. A part of you felt filthy for betraying her trust the way you did but the other side of you couldn’t let go of your infatuation with this man. Despite everything, you still wanted him but you knew her unexpected return only meant the worst. 

Satoshi and Eri ran to their mother, trapping her in a hug that said how much they missed her presence. They spent the whole weekend awaiting her return. No matter what you tried, they just couldn’t get their mother off their mind.

You were just a placeholder to them, someone to just barely keep them occupied until she returned. You could never hold a candle to her. You would never replace her. 

Shouta, on the other hand, remained in his seat, continuing to eat his meal. Truly a master of the art of stoicism, he didn’t seem the slightest bit affected by her presence. His eyes met yours for a brief moment and even then you couldn’t tell what was running through his mind. You wondered if he shared the same sentiments as his children. Were you just a placeholder in his eyes as well or did he mean the things he said to you?

“Dinner smells great.” She flashed a bright smile as she skipped past you hand in hand with her children who were practically dragging her to the dining room table. “I’m starving.”

So were you. That’s why you prepared a meal suitable for four people. A meal you planned to eat with Shouta and his children. You wanted to feel like a family. Even if the children were completely oblivious to the implications of this dinner, you’d know it was much more than a housekeeper sharing a meal with her employers. That dinner would’ve been the start of your own familial bond. 

But, she came back. 

Of course. 

Of fucking course she came back. 

Now, you could only watch from the kitchen as she enjoyed a meal meant for you. With the man meant for you. In the house meant for you. With the family you wished was yours. 

Tears fell from your eyes, creating ripples in the sudsy dish water as you looked at how they interacted with each other. She was their mother. Even though you did it all: the cooking and cleaning, helping them with homework and preparing them for bed, making lunches and picking them up from school. She was the one who made their faces light up. She was the one who made them happy. 

How could you be so foolish to think one weekend would automatically change the way they viewed you? Better yet, change anything at all? You took your anger out on the dishes, scrubbing the pans so hard that water splashed back at you. 

“Shit.” You whispered as a pot slipped from your hand and hit the ground. The sound of metal crashing to the floor caught the attention of everyone in the dining room causing them to become silent. They tried peeking into the kitchen to see what happened, but to their surprise, you weren’t there. Your feet carried you up the stairs and away from the kitchen that made you feel like nothing more than a maid. The sound of your quick paced steps made Aizawa excuse himself from dinner to run after you. 

Closing the guest room door behind you, you prayed for a few moments to collect your thoughts. Seeing them together would have never bothered you before this past weekend, but once you let him inside of you things changed. You had gotten a taste of what it’s like to be his and you didn’t want to go on without it. You wanted to always enjoy the feeling of being seen, being admired by Shouta. When you closed your eyes and thought about the moment you two shared, you could practically feel his hands roaming your body. You could feel his breath on your neck, his sweat dripping onto your skin. How would you go on without that feeling? The short answer was, you’d have to. 

You said you’d be there for Shouta but that didn’t mean you’d wait around while he attempted to fix things with his wife. Twice now, the thought of quitting this job crossed your mind but your attraction to Shouta made you stay. Not the money, or the hours which were the things that originally made you take the job. It was him. You suffered day in and day out for the sake of seeing that face and hearing his voice for a few brief moments. There was no way you could walk in this house everyday without feeling resentment toward his wife. She had the luxury of being with the man you dreamed of yet she still chose to cheat and you hated her for that. So, as long as she was here, you couldn’t be. 

Soft knocks at the door forced you to stand your feet, gathering the few items you left sitting in the guest room over the weekend. Shouta softly pushed the door open to find you with your bags thrown over your shoulder. 

“Listen, I need you to believe me when I say I didn’t think she’d come home. I mean that night I sent her screenshots of the transactions, I sent her proof, I told her I knew she was cheating and I wanted nothing more to do with her.” His words came out fast once he realized you were ready to leave. At the very least, he wanted you to hear him out. 

“Did you really think it would be that simple? That a few text messages would be enough?” You laughed harshly. “Her children are here, her life is here. Of course she’d come home.” You were speaking to both yourself and Shouta. He told you she wouldn’t return because he believed it to be true and you chose to believe Shouta simply because it allowed you to remain in his arms for a few nights longer. “God, what was I thinking? I’m so stupid.” 

“No. You’re not stupid.” Shouta stepped closer to you, wrapping his hands around your own. “You didn’t do anything wrong. We’re adults and I really enjoyed what we did.”

“Didn’t do anything wrong?” You scoffed. “I slept with a married man. Regardless of your situation, regardless of her cheating, I made a conscious decision to sleep with you knowing-.”

“You did what?” You lost all feelings in your legs as you locked eyes with Mrs. Aizawa, who ran after you and Shouta solely to make sure you were okay. “Shouta you slept with this woman? In our house? How could you?” Her lips quivered. The grave expression on her face instantly made you feel terrible. 

“Please, don’t play innocent. You started this.” He released his grip on your hands to turn and face his wife. “You’ve been fucking whoever for months now. Did you think I was an idiot? That I wouldn’t notice the late nights and the lingering smell of cologne? You’d run to the bathroom, wash his scent off of you then lay next to me like nothing happened for months.” 

“I didn’t think you cared. You were so distracted by her, shit!” Mrs. Aizawa pointed at you, fingers shaking from anger. “I noticed how you looked at her during the interview, but I let go because I knew she was perfect for the job. Then I saw how you interacted when you had conversations, how you looked at her, how your eyes lit up when she walked into the room and how you’d sulk when she left for the night. But, Eri was feeling so much better so once again, I let it go.” Slapping her hand against her face, she let out a heavy sigh. “But I could only take so much of that, Shouta. Months of feeling unwanted and unattractive. Even when you made love to me I knew you were thinking about her. So I found someone who was attracted to me and only me.” Mrs. Aizawa laughed while shaking her head. “If you would’ve confronted me, showed me some fucking passion or something I would’ve stopped that moment, but you didn’t say a word. I made it obvious on purpose. I wanted to know you still cared.” She cried. 

“You sound crazy. I mean honestly, do you hear yourself? Do I think she’s attractive? Of course, but that’s all it was. You let your insecurities get the best of you. Instead of talking to me about it, you decided to cheat.” Shouta talked through his teeth. He didn’t want to yell and alarm the children. 

“You cheated, too!” Mrs. Aizawa semi screamed, her voice cracking with every word. “Two wrongs don’t make a right, Shouta.” She paused, shutting the door all the way. Stepping past Shouta, Mrs. Aizawa stood in front of you. “And you, after all we’ve done for you I figured you’d show a little gratitude, but you behaved like a low class slut. I will be sure to tell my friends. You will never work again.”

You couldn’t speak if you wanted to; your throat dry and mind racing as a reaction to confrontation. All you wanted to do was cry but you wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of seeing you like that. Cowardice, you had the balls to sleep with her husband but not enough to address her like a woman. 

“Leave her out of this.” Shouta spoke up for you. Grabbing his wife’s arm, he turned her around to face him. “I know what I did but we could’ve avoided all this if you had spoken up.” His voice was stern. “We could’ve easily replaced her, but splitting up our family.” He paused, exhaling to calm himself down. “Splitting up our family is hard. That’s why I didn’t say anything. Not because I didn’t care but because I was scared of losing you, losing the kids. I’m still scared of losing you.” Shouta admitted. This family is something they built together. 7 years of marriage down the drain over miscommunication is something he couldn’t fathom. 

It was crazy to see how fast Shouta flipped his narrative, but what hurt more than anything was watching him wrap his hands around her own like he had done to you less than two minutes ago. The only difference was the expression in his eyes; he looked at her like he loved her, something you wish you could experience. 

“I should go. It’s obvious you two have some things to talk about.” You whispered softly, completely broken from the words Shouta said. You were expendable. He’d replace you then all of their problems would be solved. “I’m truly sorry for all of the trouble I’ve caused.” 

You wanted him to follow you, but once you reached the bottom of the stairs you realized that wouldn’t happen. Stepping into the kitchen you waved at the kids, telling them you’d see them tomorrow even though it was a lie. Closing the front door behind you, you let out a heavy sigh. Exiting the Aizawa’s residence was a bittersweet moment. You’d never see him again but knowing your absence would heal their family put you at ease. Your very presence was the reason their marriage was hanging by a thread, so the least you could do was set aside your own selfish desires and leave them be. 

Your commute home was different tonight. Normally you’d spend your train ride thinking about ways to impress Shouta but after tonight you could only think about the damage you’d unintentionally caused both them and yourself. You let lust cloud your better judgement and now you were the only person truly suffering from the decision you made. In the end, Aizawa and his wife had each other, but you were left with nothing. 

After getting off the train, you took a long walk home on purpose. You were in no rush to be in your apartment, confined to solitude and left with your thoughts. You went everywhere you could think of. Your favorite convenient store, the park you loved, you even stopped by a bar for a few minutes, but you could only avoid your home for so long. 

Opening the door to your apartment, you threw your things on the floor and screamed as loud as you could. Being home dragged you back to reality. This was the first time that you actually thought about yourself and the consequences of your actions. You needed that job to pay for school and your apartment. You needed that job for the experience. You threw all of that away for one night pleasure. This whole time you’d been so consumed with Aizawa and trying to be a part of his life that you put yourself on the back burner. 

You walked past the living room, kicking your shoes off along the way. Pushing your bedroom door open, you were met with a mess you left behind, your clothes scattered all over the room. You laughed, thinking about how you spent Friday morning picking out an outfit to impress Shouta. How naive of you to think you to think these trivial things would make him leave his wife. Your laughing turned hysterical as you haphazardly shoved your clothes into your closet. Cleaning your room was just the tip of the iceberg. You’d be cleaning up the mess in your life for a while, but for now you just wanted to rest. Falling onto your bed, you cried. 

You had everything you wanted right in the palm of your hands, but you were forced to let it go. 

—————————-

5 years later. 

You had everything you wanted. Despite some rough patches, you were able to obtain a Master’s degree and finally start your career. You started off in foster homes, working as a behavioral therapist. Then you started your own practice, making a home for children with quirks deemed unfit for society. A place where children who were cast out and abandoned by their families could learn and be loved. 

Grocery shopping was one of your favorite things to do. On Saturday, you spent your mornings roaming the aisles of numerous grocery stores, searching for food that would satisfy your children’s diverse palettes. It was one of the few times a week you got to spend to yourself. You were the manager, you employed your own staff and you were the primary provider for these children. Your days were always busy and your nights were often spent consoling terrified children, so the time you spent by yourself was important for your mental health. It allowed you to unpack any problems you had without being bothered by children or your staff. 

The dreaded snack aisle, the place you spent most of your time. It was important for you to find good, healthy snacks for the kids to enjoy. You stepped on the shelf to grab some applesauce, but your foot slipped and you fell. You were prepared to hit the ground, but you didn’t. The hand pressed against your back kept you stable as you slowly stepped down onto the tile floor. 

“Thank you.” You turned around with a smile that immediately faded when you saw who saved you. The joke you were prepared to make was wiped from your mind and you were only left with thoughts from your past. 

Shouta Aizawa, the man you spent a year forgetting about as you struggled through your final year of graduate school. The man whose touch was so intoxicating that no one else ever came close to giving you the feeling he did. The man who cheated on his wife with you. The reason you swore to never be someone’s side piece or second option again. Honestly, he was the reason you swore off men until you were stable and well rounded. A few years ago if you had run into him, you would’ve fled the store without looking back but now you felt secure and confident about your place in society. 

That didn’t necessarily mean you were excited to see him. It was cringe worthy to think about your former self running from his house, holding back tears. That moment was the closest thing to a heart break you’d ever experienced. It took months of therapy and focus to realize that their relationship problems weren’t your fault, even though you did play a part in what you assumed was their demise. 

“No problem. I would hate to see you slam into the ground.” You pressed your lips together, appearing unamused by his comment. When you didn’t reply, he knew he had spark up another conversation to keep you in his presence for a little while longer. “That’s a lot of groceries.” He peaked around you, looking into your cart filled to the top. 

“Oh, they’re for my kids.” You waved it off with a smile. They were one of the few things that genuinely made you happy. 

“Kids?” He choked. Peering down, he looked for a ring on your finger, but your hands were hidden behind your back. 

“Well not my kids.” You laughed. “I run a facility meant to help kids who were cast out because of their quirks. I’ve taken care of a few of them since birth so they feel like my own.” Your eyes lit up when you talked about them. You loved those children with your whole heart. “But speaking of kids, how are Eri and Satoshi?”

“They’re fine.” He nodded his head. “They’re both doing really well in school. Eri is actually thinking of applying for Yuuei and Satoshi is taking up soccer. It took a while to find Eri a new therapist. She just wouldn’t open up to anybody like she did with you.” 

“That’s good to hear and Mrs. Aizawa?” You whispered, almost afraid to receive an answer. There was a part of you that still cared, a part of you that still wished he would have ran after you 5 years ago. 

“Who knows.” He lifted his left hand, showing off his bare ring finger. That almost meant nothing to you. The last time you saw him without a ring on his finger, he was apologizing to his wife a few days later. “We split shortly after she found out about us. You were the least of our problems, though.”

“I know.” You said confidently. It was nice to hear him say that, though; the reassurance made you feel whole. “I’m glad you got to keep the kids. I can tell how much you care about them.”

“I can see how much you care about yours.” He motioned to your cart again. “Let me get this for you.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

“Well you didn’t, I offered.” He smiled, pushing your cart along before you had a chance to disagree. 

You followed behind him in shock that he’d do something so nice for you and the kids. Despite his tough exterior, you knew Aizawa was a softie; you thought back to how he used to talk about his students. 

The two of you stood in line, catching up on each other’s lives. You found out that they actually tried couple’s therapy to get over their rough patch but that didn’t help. The two of them were so busy that they could never commit to a time; it was then they realized how little they cared. You make time for the things you want and neither of them were willing to compromise. 

You told him about how it was working in social services. The work was brutal. It took a toll on your mental health seeing children neglected and abused on a daily basis. You were doing what you could to reform the system that villainized kids for something they couldn’t control. 

After paying for your groceries, Shouta escorted you to your car and helped you put your things inside. 

“It was so kind of you to buy those groceries.” Your mouth curved into a smile. Honestly, this profession didn’t make a lot of money. You relied heavily on government grants to care for these kids. “I could never repay you.”

“Let me take you out to dinner?” He said with a cocky grin plastered on his face. Shouta had to see you again and he hoped you felt the same. 

It felt insane to get involved with him after all of these years, but it didn’t feel like a coincidence that he was the one to catch you in the store. You couldn’t deny the emotions that came rushing back when you laid eyes on him. Regardless of the way things ended, your employment and your “relationship”, Shouta crossed your mind every now and then. What was the harm in one date?

“Sure.” You drew your lower lip in between your teeth as he handed you his phone to put in your contact information. 

“I’ll text you later on this week with reservation details.” He pulled you into a hug. “It was so good to see you.” He opened your car door for you, leaning down to get one last look into your eyes. 

“Yeah.” You shook your head. “You too.” He closed your door, leaving you in the car alone.

A small smile formed on your face. After all these years, Shouta Aizawa still had the same effect on you. 

———————————

Why did I agree to this? You flattened your skirt as you stepped out of the taxi. 

You were nervous. When Shouta asked you to accompany him to dinner you thought it was a joke then he sent you reservation details and you could’ve sworn your heart stopped. You used to dream of being on his arm, partaking in the “glamorous” life of a hero. This would be your chance to see how well you fit into his world. 

From the outside you could tell this restaurant was far nicer than anywhere you’d been in a long time. The night of your graduation your parents took you somewhere fancy, but even that didn’t compare. 

Opening the door you were instantly met by a hostess. “Name?” She smiled before looking down at the clipboard clutched in her right hand. 

Clearing your throat, you spoke. “It should be under Aizawa.” You pulled your phone from your purse, prepared to shoot him a text just in case there was a mix up. 

“Would you like to check your coat?” You nodded while removing your trench coat and handing it to the young man stationed on your left. “Right this way.” She placed the clipboard at her side before showing you to your table. 

The outside honestly didn’t do the restaurant justice. Reaching the top of the grand staircase, your eyes twinkled, completely in awe of the decor. Dimly lit chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. Large glass windows, draped in navy blue curtains, giving you the perfect view of the city. Flowers and candles adorning every table. And in the corner, was your date for the evening, Shouta Aizawa. 

He spotted you the minute you walked upstairs, completely enthralled by your appearance. Elbows rested on the table with his chin placed on his hands, he watched you carefully with a narrow gaze as you admired your surroundings before catching up to the hostess. As you drew closer, he stood to his feet to greet you. Sending the hostess off, he wrapped you in a hug. 

“This is nice.” You slid into the booth before immediately opening the menu to look at the drink options. You needed liquid courage to make it through the night. 

“Call it a late graduation present.” He smirked at you, removing his phone from the table so you had his undivided attention. “You look amazing.” He sipped his drink slowly, his eyes never leaving yours.  

There was no way you could lie and say you weren’t the least bit excited about the date. You spent the whole afternoon doing your hair and making sure your makeup was perfect. The dark smokey eye and burgundy lip went well with your outfit. A black two piece matching set: a wrapped crop top and a ruched maxi skirt with a slit in it. You matched your jewelry and shoes perfectly with the jacket that you had on earlier.  

“Thank you.” You grinned, happy that he noticed your effort. “So do you.” You didn’t say that because he complimented you, you meant it. His usually unruly hair was pulled back into a low bun, streaks of grey hidden under his black strands. The suit he was wearing fit his body just right, accentuating the muscles his hero costume hid. His neck was normally hidden under his scarf so just seeing it made you feel naughty. But most of all, he looked well rested and the look in his eyes told you he was more than prepared for a long night. 

The two of you started by ordering drinks and appetizers. You assumed that tonight would be boring, full of awkward conversations and quiet moments. But by the time the second round of drinks came out and the waitress brought your appetizers, the two of you couldn’t stop laughing. 

You never realized how much you missed your quick conversations and now that you had more time to elaborate without prying eyes, those quick conversations went on for hours. Shouta always knew you were smart, but the things you talked about tonight showed him just how much you’d grown. You went on about the children you were raising, giving him the details of their quirks asking for advice on handling them. He promised he would come help out one day and that made you happy. He talked about UA, his most recent group of students sounded promising. Shouta was a good teacher, while his methods didn’t sound gentle they were effective when training future heroes. It felt nice to talk to him like this. Two people talking about their professions, sharing wisdom and giving words of encouragement. 

As the night carried on, the two of you moved closer to each other, meeting in the middle of the large, circular booth. Your head rested on his right shoulder, laughing at the jokes he whispered in your ear about the couples sitting near your table. His hand rested on the skin exposed by the slit in your skirt. Even after all these years, nothing satisfied you like his touch. 

The dinner was great. Your entrees weren’t small like you feared they would be. You picked off of his plate, fed him from yours. From the outside, the two of you looked like a great couple and at one point that’s all you ever wanted: to look, speak, act like you belonged next to him. Though it was rare he carried himself this way, you could tell Shouta was made of money and even though he was underground, the status that came with being a hero was always a plus. Now that you’d established yourself, it felt right pursuing something with him. You were no longer his maid, you were a strong woman with your own practice. 

“You ready?” He whispered in your ear as the waitress took your plates. 

You shook your head yes. “Let me go to the restroom while you pay. I’ll meet you downstairs?” You smiled while sliding out of the booth and walking to the ladies’ room. 

You stood in the mirror giving yourself a quick pep talk before exiting the restroom and looking for your date for the evening. 

Shouta watched in awe as you descended the staircase, walking like you owned the place. Heads turning as they passed you by, but you could only keep your eyes on him. There was something he loved about your new found confidence. Something that only made him want you more. He took your hand at the last stair to help you and also to stop the stares from greedy men. 

Like the gentleman he was, Shouta opened the door for you, his hand discretely caressing your ass when you walked by. He followed you to the edge of the sidewalk, where you waited for a taxi to pull up. 

“You didn’t drive?” Shouta placed your coat on your shoulders from behind. He let his arms linger around your waist and he buried his chin in the crook of your neck. You shook your head no and you felt him smile. “Because you knew you’d be leaving with me?” Shouta’s mouth hovered dangerously close to your ear, his cool breath tickling the inside. 

“No, shut up.” You smacked his arm but that didn’t make him move. It actually made him hold you closer. You could feel a bulge growing in his pants. It was nice to know he was just as anxious as you. Truthfully, you knew Shouta was right about your reason for not driving, but you’d never give him the satisfaction of telling him that. “So, where are we going?”

He didn’t answer your question, instead he grabbed your hand and led you down the sidewalk adjacent to the restaurant you just dined at. The night life was so comforting. The two of you moved against the crowd like young lovers who couldn’t wait to get their hands on each other. The constant chatter drowned out the nasty things he said to you so shamelessly. 

The hotel Shouta booked for the weekend was just as nice as the restaurant you went to. He was honestly trying his hardest to wine and dine you. He wanted you to feel special and you did. 

The two your way past the concierge’s desk and onto the elevator. The minute the doors shut behind you, Shouta pinned you in the corner, ghosting his lips over yours. He squinted his eyes, searching yours for any hints of reservations and sense of regret. When he found nothing but adoration in those doe eyes of yours, he kissed you. Instinctively, your body moved toward his. Pushing yourself up from the steel elevator walls, you rested your arms lazily on his shoulders, your fingers caressing the nape of his neck. As the doors opened, he bit his lip while shaking his head, mumbling something along the lines of how he couldn’t wait to get his hands on you. 

The room’s dark interior immediately set the mood. The matte black furniture meshed so well with the dim lights and greenery. You were in the middle of Yokohama, but you felt like you were in the jungle. 

Throwing your jacket over the chair, you allowed the cool air in the room to hit your skin. Hotel air conditioning units always worked better so for the time being, you turned it off. You wanted the room to be warm and muggy. You wanted to see Shouta sweat. 

“Did I tell you how good you look tonight?” Shouta’s hands landed on your hips and unlike earlier you decided to indulge him. 

Rolling your eyes, you pressed against the bulge forming in his pants. “About a hundred times, but I appreciate every single one.” You dropped your head back so you could look him in the eyes. “I’m really glad you invited me out tonight.”

“I’m glad you accepted.” He placed a small kiss on the tip of your nose. “I really missed you.” He released his grip on you, going to sit on the bed. 

“Really? How much?” You smiled, walking to stand in between his legs. 

You felt powerful standing over him but the minute his hand touched your waist, you lost all control. His touch was like a drug for you. You’d done a great job of holding yourself together all night, but you finally allowed yourself to give in to the feeling of passion that made you high. 

Shouta peeled off your outfit, his eyes taking in every inch of your bare skin. You were hardly bashful but the intense glare he was giving had heat rushing to your cheeks. He placed soft kisses on your stomach as he slid your skirt down your legs and held it still so you could step over it. You were left in nothing but your lingerie and the five inch heels you wore tonight. 

The lingerie set you wore was burgundy with hints of gold and orange in the trimming. You wanted something that embodied fall, your favorite season, and this set did just that. The lacy bra did a good job of barely covering your nipples and the underwear were so thin they could be ripped off. One look at you had Shouta ready to take you, but he didn’t want to rush the night. He wanted to savor every moment with you. 

Standing to his feet, Shouta pulled you into a sensual kiss. Your heart pounded in your chest and the familiar feeling of butterflies swirled in your stomach. Eyes closed, you could only focus on the way he made you feel. When you landed on the bed, you let a warm laugh escape your mouth. You were so entranced by the kiss that you hadn’t even noticed he’d turn you around, so he could sit you on the bed. You extended your legs as his fingers gilded gently from your thighs, over your knees and down your shins. Stopping at the straps of your heels, he undid them and pulled them off. 

“Fuck.” He cursed under his breath. You looked breathtakingly beautiful. Shouta was upset with himself for letting you walk out his house five years ago, but everything happened for a reason. All that matters is that he had you again and he wouldn’t let you go. “Baby, you really look amazing.” 

You only laughed as you began to undress him. The roles had reversed. Now, Shouta was hovering on you, exuding power and sensuality. Button by button, his bare chest and chiseled abs were exposed to you. It’s as if the curtains were being pulled back and the angels were harmonizing; his body was just that perfect. The man aged like fine wine and you knew it was the hero work that kept him fit. You threw his shirt onto the loveseat in the corner before moving on to his pants. You used one hand to quickly remove the belt and undo his zipper, eager to see his growing cock straining under the confines of his briefs. 

Placing his index finger under your chin, Shouta lifted your head so you were looking up at him. Your wide eyes, beaming with vulnerability, made Shouta smile to himself before leaning down to kiss you, softly at first, and then the kiss became so sloppy, so desperate that it made you dizzy. You placed your hands on his cheeks, gripping his face firmly to keep yourself stable. The kiss never broke, even when you lifted your hips to scoot yourself further on to the bed while Shouta crawled to join you. Once settled on the plush, cotton comforter he used one hand to gently push you back on the bed, while using the other rub circles on your lace covered clit. You moaned into his mouth, allowing his tongue to slip inside. Pulling your panties to the side, he pushed two fingers along your slick folds. While his weight was unevenly distributed, you pushed him from on top of you and quickly pinned him down on the bed. 

“Damn.” He mumbled, turned on by the way you tossed him. 

Lowering yourself onto his clothed member, you began to slowly move your hips back and forth. You almost felt like you were too old for dry humping, but when Shouta coughed to keep himself groaning you knew you made the right choice. The friction you created had you both excited for everything tonight had in store. 

Leaning down, you peppered kisses along his neckline, using your tongue to tease the soft spot right above his collar bone. The sounds that escaped his lips were euphoric, making you hum happily as you snagged his ear between your incisors. Smiling, you let your tongue roll from your mouth and licked from his ear to the base of his neck, leaving a trail of saliva along the way. His low groans had transformed into heavy breathing and curse words littered with occasional “please”. You were soaking wet, watching as he squirmed under your touch. You knew his neck was sensitive but his reaction made you think he could cum from this alone. 

Shouta used one to free his cock from his boxers, stroking himself desperately as you assaulted his neck with your teeth. The feeling of him touching himself underneath you sent a shock through your body, making you moan against his neck before switching sides. You focused on the left side of his neck, alternating between open mouth kisses and sucking hard enough to leave a mark. You traced small circles over the trail of saliva you made on the right side of his neck, giving him enough stimulation to make his body stiffen briefly before relaxing with a laugh. You could feel a little of the mess he made on your ass. You took upon yourself to clean him up. Hopping off of him and moving your face toward his dick, you licked him clean before giving him a smile. 

“Such a tease” He growled, earning a laugh from you. 

“Look at what you do to me. Seeing you so vulnerable just-.” You sighed, unable to put the feeling into words. Grabbing his hand, you guided his fingers to your folds, now dripping wet from the sweet sounds he made in your ear. 

Taking his hand back, he sucked the juices off of his finger. Licking his lips in satisfaction, Shouta smirked up at you. “Fuck, you taste the same.” Forcefully pushing you on your back, he pulled your underwear off and spread your legs. “I’ve missed this.” He smiled, rubbing his calloused hands over your moisturized thighs. 

He planted kisses along your inner thigh. The stubble on his chin left behind a strange sensation that only made you want more of his touch. The sassy remark you were about to make about him teasing you was ripped from your throat along with the air you were about to inhale. His warm tongue lapping over your folds was enough to send you into shock for a few seconds. You’d forgotten how generous of a lover Shouta was, but he was quick to remind you. Painfully slow, long licks had you iching for more. Rolling your hips, you fucked yourself against his tongue, making sure he passed over your clit every now and then. 

Once you got used to his pace, he switched it, moving his tongue faster, focusing more intensely on your throbbing bundle of nerves. You placed your hand on his head, gently running your fingers through his black locks. He stopped suddenly, making you whine before plunging two long fingers into your dripping core and securing his lips around your clit. He sucked on you ferociously while continuously pushing his fingers into your g-spot. 

“Shouta.” You moaned, mouth wide open, a drop of drool sliding down your cheek. “Add one more, please.” You begged and when he did as you asked, you rewarded him with a soft moan. 

“I love a woman who knows what she wants.” He talked into your cunt, the vibrations from his voice made you whimper. “I know you’re ready to cum for me.” He quickened the pace of his fingers, twisting them ferociously, yearning for your release. 

Your stomach caved in as a pulsating sensation ran through your pussy. Shouta shook his head, using the flat of his tongue to catch the juices from your orgasm while still stimulating you. 

Lifting his head, you noticed the small string of saliva hanging from his chin. As he crawled closer to you, you pulled him into a hungry kiss. Desperate to taste yourself and also feel his tongue swirl around your mouth. 

“Fuck me.” Even though you were still panting from your first release, your voice was alluring to him. 

His body hovered over yours with his arms on either side of you. He pushed all of his weight to the left side of his body and used his right arm to guide himself inside of you with a hiss. He alternated between quick experimental thrust and rubbing his tip along your folds while he adjusted to how wet and warm you were. 

Rolling his neck, he let out a breathy laugh. “You feel so good.” 

Shouta dropped onto his forearms so he could be closer to you. The sweat forming on his body felt cool against your skin. His forehead rested gently on top of yours. You inhaled the air he exhaled. In this moment, you felt like one. His thrusts were slow and methodical, allowing you to feel everything he had to offer. The love you felt pouring off of him was unlike anything you’d experienced in a long time. Even if you knew he didn’t really love you, it felt like and for the night  you were fine with that. 

His gaze was gentle yet carnal, full of lust and passion. You couldn’t handle it so you closed your eyes much to his disapproval. “Look at me.” He demanded, his low voice sending chills down your spine. Your eyes fluttered open to find him looking smugly at you. 

Your lips found their way to his ear, releasing your low, drawn out moans that only fueled the need fuck you senseless. 

Shouta’s large hands snaked around your neck as his pace sped up; his slightly curved cock slamming into you again and again. He swiftly threw one of your legs over his shoulder, allowing himself more access to the deepest parts of you. The sensation was overwhelming for the both you; you could tell by the way his eyes rolled back and how erratic his strokes became. Removing his hand from your neck, he used the pad of his thumb to put pressure on your clit. 

“Shouta.” You moaned, pushing your head so far back into the mattress that your back started to arch off the bed. His name was the only thing you could think of; you repeated it like a mantra as he drilled into you. 

“Don’t hold it in.” He talked through his teeth, focusing on holding himself together long enough for you to cum first. “Come on baby. Show me how good I make you feel.”

You melted into the mattress as the swirling pressure in your stomach fizzled away. Shouta let your juices flow onto his throbbing dick before pulling out and releasing his seed on your stomach. Flopping on the bed next to you, he sighed in satisfaction. 

“Let me get you a rag.” He smacked your thigh. 

“It’s okay.” You smiled. “I’m just gonna take a shower. Join me?” You whispered seductively. 

“No.” He laughed at your pouting face as he rolled from the bed and walked to the bathroom. He was never big in sharing showers and he would use your brief absence to get some work done. “But you enjoy yourself.” You stood to follow him in the bathroom and run the water. 

He wiped himself down before leaving you in the bathroom by yourself. Stepping into the black marble shower, you felt instant relief on some of your sore areas. The hot water and the steam relaxed your body in a way only a nice drink after a long day could. Sitting on the bench in the shower, you let the water run over your legs. Head pressed against the wall, you thought about the day with the goofiest smile plastered on your face. Shouta really made you feel like a child, giddy from the flashbacks of the evening. 

You washed yourself off using the hotel’s soap. The strong yet relaxing scent of eucalyptus was in their products and you loved it. Rising yourself off one final time, you stepped out of the shower and dried yourself off. Wrapping the towel around you, you stepped into the bedroom. 

“I actually didn’t bring any clothes.” Your voice caught his attention, pulling off his glasses he turned in the desk chair to face you. You bit the inside of your cheek, hoping he’d have something for you. “I wasn’t expecting this.” You motioned to the hotel room. Except, a part of you was expecting this, hoping he’d whisk you away for a romantic week. 

He walked to the closet, pulling out a suitcase and throwing you one of his many black, long sleeved shirts. It stopped mid thigh on you so you were fine roaming the room with no underwear on. Shouta returned to his spot at the desk, watching you look at yourself in the mirror.  

“Looks good on you.” He patted his lap and you ran to sit in it. 

“You think so Eraserhead.” He nodded with a laugh while running circles on your bare thigh. “That means so much coming from you.” You teased. Looking at his tablet, you realized he was doing work. “Hey! No work.” You smiled, locking his device before hopping off of his lap and making yourself comfortable in between his legs on the floor. 

“You won’t let me rest will you?” He laughed. “I’m not young anymore.” He bit his lip while looking at you settled on your knees, groping his cock through his sweats. The second you felt him grow, you stripped him of his pants and boxers. 

“Could’ve fooled me.”

You opened your mouth and stuck your tongue out, allowing all the saliva you collected to slowly drip onto Shouta’s semi erect dick. In one swift motion, you swallowed him whole, wanting nothing more than to feel him grow in your mouth. As you felt him getting harder, you pulled off his cock, opting to run the flat of your tongue along his shaft before swirling around his tip and giving it a quick kiss. 

Shouta had enough of your teasing. Placing his hand on the back of your neck, he guided you down his length, setting a pace that was pleasurable for him. Your eyes squeezed shut as you forced all of him into your mouth, bobbing your head and hollowing out your cheeks. 

“You’re doing great, baby.” He pushed your hair out of your face. “Just like that.” 

You hummed in satisfaction at his praise, sending vibrations down his now fully erect cock. You managed to make it to the base, opening your mouth wider, your tongue rolled out of your mouth to lick his balls. He hissed at the sensation, thrusting his hips up so you could do it again. 

You ignored your gag reflex and your need for air. The only thing that mattered was pleasing him. Tears formed as Shouta picked up the pace, fucking your throat mercilessly. Heat began to pool between your legs. Sending one hand down, you toyed with your clit, making you moan around his cock. 

“I see you touching yourself.” His words came out slow. “If you want to fuck again, you’re doing the work this time.” You nodded as you pulled his dick from your mouth. 

Standing to your feet, you turned around giving him a view of your ass. Bending over, you reached your arm through your legs, grabbing his length and giving it a few pumps. Shouta smacked your ass while you aligned his dick with your entrance and sunk down on him. 

“Shit.” You both moaned, completely in love with the feeling of him stretching you out. 

You remained still before sinfully rolling your hips. Shouta’s hands shot to your waist, steadying you and halting your movements as he enjoyed the feeling of his cock inside of you. 

Gripping the armrests of the chair to steady yourself, you started to bounce on his length. His grip on your waist tightened, keeping him somewhat in control of your speed. This feeling was amazing. Shouta had flashbacks of the first time you rode him and your skills had only gotten better. The way you clenched around him as you raised and fell on to his thick cock had him seeing stars. 

His hands moved from your waist underneath the shirt you were wearing to grope your breast. He pinched both of your nipples, rolling them between your fingers, sending a tingling sensation down your spine. Your head fell back onto his shoulders, and your mouth dropped open. Shouta nibbled on your ear, only adding to the overwhelming stimulation you were feeling. 

“Kitten.” He moaned into your back before biting down on your shoulder. 

Kitten? The term of endearment he only ever called you in your dreams. Heat rushed between your legs and to compensate for the feeling you bounced even harder. Shouta noticed your increase in speed and thrust up matching your pace. 

At this rate, Shouta would cum any minute. 

He lifted you off of his length, allowing himself a few seconds to collect his thoughts. Standing up, Shouta bent you over the bed to take control. His thrusts were quick and powerful, pushing deeper into you with every stroke. He rubbed your pussy, spreading your slick to your ass before licking his thumb and sliding it into your puckered hole. Your hands flung out to grab the sheets, grab something to keep you sane. Muffled moans letting him know, you liked the new sensation. 

“You look so pretty like this.” Shouta used his free hand to continuously slap your ass. You whimpered from the harsh contact, only making you wetter by the second.

Removing his finger from your asshole, Shouta grabbed both of yours arms behind your back, using them to pull you back on his cock and keep you from running from his strokes. 

“Any louder and we’ll have complaints.” His gruff voice made you weak in the knees. “Fuck, your close. I can feel it.” 

It didn’t take him long to learn your body. Shouta was an observant man; he knew how to make you feel good and he knew when you were about to cum. He was the perfect lover. 

Your arms fell to your side as Shouta released his grip on them, opting to use his right to push down on the small of your back while the left made its way to your mouth. He placed his thumb in your mouth, allowing you to twirl your tongue around it before he pulled on the corner of your lips, hooking you like a fish that fell for the bait. He propped one of his legs up on the edge of the bed, fucking you from an angle that made your whole body tremble, especially your legs, virtually reduced to putty as he pounded into your sweet spot. 

Shouta was close too. You could feel it. His cock throbbing inside of you, ready for his own release. He snapped his hips into you one last time, balls smacking your cunt. You sunk into the mattress, completely worn out from the night as your final orgasm rushed through you. 

“Don’t.” You stopped him from pulling out of your aching cunt.  You wanted to feel his warm seed inside of you. 

Shouta pulled out of you slowly, leaving you feeling empty. You could feel the mix of your juices running down your leg. It was more than satisfying. 

You could fall asleep right where you were: still bent over the bed, ass in the air. You had a busy day and tonight was the stress reliever you needed. The sensation of a warm washcloth against your pussy made you melt. Shouta cleaned you off, making sure he got everything that was dripping 

“Do you need anything?” He pressed a lingering kiss on your cheek, making the corners of your mouth turn up. 

“A water would be nice.” You said while crawling into the bed and getting comfortable under the covers. 

Shouta grabbed you a water bottle from the minibar and put on his sweatpants before joining you in the bed. He wrapped his arms around, pulling you closer to his warm body. 

“You remember what you said to me?” Shouta whispered in your ear. His voice husky from how tired he was. You shook your head no, taking a sip of your water. “I know now might not be the time, but when it is, I’ll be here for you.” He repeated your words verbatim. “Now is the time.”

You flipped over to face him. “Listen, I was naive then but now I don’t have time for lies. I have kids to worry about and I don’t need my ment-.”

Shouta shut you up with a kiss. A searing kiss that made you warm all over. “I’m sorry for how I treated you all those years ago. I knew how you felt about me and I took advantage of that, but I’m serious this time. I don’t believe in fate but I’m so glad I ran into you at the supermarket. I know this is sudden seeing as how we just reunited, but I’m ready whenever you are.”

“I’m ready now.” Sleepiness washed over you, it almost felt like you were dreaming when he said those words. “Let’s just start slowly, okay.” 

You didn’t want to rush things and he completely understood. The two of you had just found each other and given your past, you were right to be cautious. 

“Perfect.” He placed a kiss on your forehead and you smiled. Closing your eyes, you nodded off to sleep. 

When you woke up in the morning, Shouta was in the process of placing the room service he ordered on the desk. You yawned with a stretch, catching his attention. 

“Morning.” He smirked at you, bringing you the tray of breakfast. “Sleep well.”

“What are you doing up early?”

“It’s 11:30.” He deadpanned, pointing to the clock. “Your phone has been ringing like crazy. I tried waking you up but you wouldn’t budge.” 

You raised an eyebrow, grabbing your phone and looking at your call log. You realized it was one of your employees that called you multiple times and immediately called them back. She told you one of the kids was having an episode and only wanted to see you. Jumping out of the bed you threw on your skirt from last night and tucked Shouta’s large black shirt into it. 

“Everything okay?” His brows drew together as he watched you frantically gather your things. 

“No, one of my babies isn’t feeling well.” You explained. “I’m so sorry but I really have to go.”

“But you didn’t drive. Let me take you. Maybe I can help.” He followed your lead, grabbing his things and putting on some clothes. 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to inconvenience you.”

“What did I say last night?” His question was rhetorical. “You have me, now. Nothing you ask me to do would be an inconvenience. I want to help.” He said, making you pause in your tracks. 

Walking up to him, you planted a gentle kiss on his lips. “You really are perfect. Now, let’s go.” Grabbing his hand you rushed out of the hotel. 

It was a simple gesture but it meant so much to you. Also, it wasn’t the first thing Shouta did for you and your children. He was willing to drop his relaxing weekend to help you. He was willing to deal with you, your kids and everything else you had to offer because he knew you would do the same for him. This whole time you’d been trying to see how you fit into his work when the real question was how would he fit into yours. 

The way things looked, the two of you would be just fine. 

[sparkleofpizza]

Worst things I could do - Tim Drake x Reader

Hey guys, how are you all doing? Hope everyone is staying safe during this difficult times.

So I got my first request, hope you like it! And I am sorry it took me so long to write it. I am still trying to adjust to only classes and I had so much stuff to do for college.

Warnings: swearing (maybe)

Requested by: @randomfan286 

Word count: 3.846

You had no idea how you had gotten yourself into this kind of situation. It all started because of one stupid detention, you were late to class one too many times and then the teacher decided you should work on the scenarios for the new school's play. All you had to do was paint, and you were doing your job just fine, they were playing some songs and you were actually enjoying yourself. After detention was over you were going to meet your best friend Damian at a near coffee shop, and you knew a certain someone was going to be there as well. 

Damian wasn't a big coffee fan like you, and you only chose this location because you knew his brother Tim was going to be there as well. So maybe you had a tiny crush on your best friend's older brother. You knew Damian knew, but he never approached you with the subject, you knew he would rather not hear you gush about his brother. 

"What can I do? Life is beautiful, but you don't have a clue. Sun and ocean blue, they're magnificent, it don't make sense to you." you failed to notice you had started singing along to a Lana Del Rey song, gathering some attention to you "Black beauty."

"Miss L/N, I think I have a better way for you to make up for all of your tardiness to classes." your teacher said, standing next you, with a bright smile on her face

You looked at her, frowning in confusion. You were already serving detention, what else could she want from you?

"You're going to be in your play!" She said, excited "You will be a perfect Rizzo!"

"I'm sorry, what?"

Did you hear her correctly? You were going to be part of the play? Ok, this woman was completely out of her mind. You weren't a singer, you didn't like this stuff. 

Apparently arguing was useless, you are on the play or else you'd get suspended. According to the teacher you are going to make up for your lack of effort by being on the play. Low, very low of her. 

You dragged yourself all the way to the coffee shop, suddenly not so happy about the idea you had earlier that day. All you wanted right now was to go home and scream with your face pressed against a pillow. 

As you entered the coffee shop, you saw the two brunet boys sitting near the end of the establishment. Tim had his laptop on the table and was typing on it while sipping on some black coffee, Damian was reading a book and drinking tea. You wondered if you went to the restroom and screamed they'd think you were getting attacked. 

"Hi." you said, tanking a sit next to Tim and in front of Damian, one hand coming to rest on your face while you watched them

Damian nodded his head towards you, closing his book while Tim smiled at you. Your heart skipped a beat, he was so fucking beautiful. 

"I thought you said you'd be here around five, it is only four thirty." Damian frowned at you "Did something happen at school?"

"I got released earlier, and yeah, the worst thing possible could've happened, did happen." You groaned, letting your head hit the table

That got Tim's attention as he stopped typing to stare at you. What could've happened at school? He shared a quick look with Damian, wondering if it was something concerning. He pulled some hair away from your face to take a look at your features. You tried not to blush and he hoped he wasn't being too forward, showing too much feelings. 

"What happened, y/n?" He asked quietly 

"My teacher is forcing me to be on the school's play or I'll fail her class." 

He felt relief wash over him. He was already waiting for the worst, something like: someone broke into school and made us all hostages. Thankfully it was just because of a play, well, not just because if it got you upset, it wasn't a good thing.

"That is absurd, perhaps father can do something about it." Damian frowned 

"No, it's ok." you mumbled, lifting your head from the table "I shouldn't have been late to class so many times."

Tim smiled at you "I am sure you'll do great at the play, y/n."

Being part of the theater was not something you have ever thought about, but there you were, on rehearsals, doing literally everything to be the best Rizzo ever in a Grease school's play. That also meant that you were spending a lot of time with your fellow musical's friends, and they were actually really nice.

Because of your role, you spent a lot of time with the boys from the play. You had to feel comfortable with them if you wanted to be flirtatious with any of them in front of a lot of people. Honestly, it made you ver uncomfortable at the beginning, but all of them were so so nice with you, making sure you were ok with it that you kind of just felt comfortable around them enough to do this. 

Unfortunately, that meant you spent less time with Damian, and the only time you had available was one Saturday night that he was with all of his brothers at a supposed 'party'. They were actually keeping tabs on every single one of the people around them for a case. How you managed to convince them you should tag along to make up for the loss time? You asked Dick where they were going to be at Saturday night, fooling him, and just simply showed up there after you got the answer you wanted. No one had the heart to tell you to leave because you were actually helping them with their disguise as normal people enjoining a party.

You were sitting next to Tim, your shoulders pressed together at a small sofa. Damian had left to take a look around, Dick was flirting with someone to try and get some useful information, Jason was out smoking and Duck decided to check the rest of the house - honestly he just wanted to leave you and Tim alone, hopefully something would spark there. 

"And yeah, college is a bitch, but I'm sure you're going to do great." Tim smiled at you "If you need help with your applications I am more than happy to do so."

Your attention was shifted to the phone on your lap, the screen was lighted up with a few texted messages. You stared at them for a while, before unlocking it and typing back a reply.

"Sorry, it was just James." You smiled apologetic at him, shifting in your seat so you were looking at him from a better angle "He's bored at home."

"Oh." Tim felt a bitter taste at the back of his mouth

It was just James? Who the hell was James? Surely it must be one of those theater boys you have been hanging around so much lately. He hoped he didn't looked as pissed as he felt, he didn't want you to think he was a weirdo. He was just... jealous.

"It's ok." He managed to say "You can text him back."

You shook your head, lifting your phone to your chest and pulling at the top of your dress, your hand disappearing between your breasts. He felt his breath get caught up on his throat, trying not to let his eyes wander at the cleavage you were showing, trying not to stare at your boobs. 

"There, my phone is not going to interrupt our conversation anymore." you honestly had no idea where your confidence was coming from, maybe it was the two drinks you already have had "I would love if you helped me with my college applications."

"Sure, just tell me when you are free."

"I think I have a free period sometime this week, or I can miss a rehearsal. I'm pretty sure I can come up with some excuse."

He nodded, a smile tugging at his lips. You were exchanging your time with James to be with him, that was good, right? His mind was racing, maybe you were just doing it because you really needed help with your college applications, not because you wanted to spend time with him. Don't be stupid, he reprehended himself, she could be having a thing with this James dude and you know nothing about. 

"Just text me to let me know when and where, and I'll be there."

You shifted closer to him as a group of clearly very drunk man walked pass them, making a fuss. Your knee was pressing up against his thigh, he allowed his arm, that was propped up against the couch's cushion, fall against your bare shoulders, noticing how warm and soft your skin was.

Your innocent eyes looked up at him.

"Sorry." you muttered, staring at something ahead of you "I just don't really feel comfortable around drunk guys, I never know if they are assholes or not, and... And I just remembered you guys are actually here to observe them for a case so..."

You didn't have to say anything else, he understood you very well. You suddenly felt very vulnerable and stupid for having crashed their undercover mission. 

"You don't have to apologize." Tim rubbed your shoulder "Although I must admit it isn't ideal for you to be here because it is dangerous, but I won't let anything bad happen to you."

You allowed your hand to find his, clasping them together.

"I know." you nodded "I always feel safer whenever I'm with you."

Tim felt his insides grow warm at your words. But at the back of his mind, he couldn't help but wonder if you felt the same way when you were with James.

Tim should have known better. When you had texted him to meet up at a coffee shop on a Wednesday afternoon that you weren't going to be alone. He had hoped it would be just the two of you, maybe it could actually be a good thing, where he would finally be able to ask you on a proper date, but right there beside you set none other than the James dude.

Tim did his research, of course. Not just because he had feelings for you, but because he actually cared about you, all of his family did. You were the only friend Damian had ever had outside of the superhero business that actually stuck around, and knew of their secrets. The whole family cared about your safety, so of course he did some background research on James. 

The boy was nice. He had no criminal records, lived at a nice apartment, his parents had good and honest jobs, he had two little siblings, had been on the theater and musical field for a very long time in his school career, and was actually good looking. He didn't have any secret like Tim had. He wasn't going to put your life in danger like Tim would. 

He knew James was a better person for you to date, but he couldn't help but let his jealousy overcome. Why did you invite James to tag along? Were you two dating now?

Feeling frustrated he left the coffee shop, not even bothering to come up to your table and tell you a lame excuse. 

You stared confusedly from your spot. Did Tim really just come in, stared you with a blank face, and left without saying a word? You sinked in your sit. Maybe he forgot something in the car? Maybe he had to take an important call outside? Or maybe it was a bat-related business and he had to leave in a hurry. But you knew if it was something like that he would have texted, he always texts when you two make plans and he can't make it.

Later that night, as you were lying in bed, trying to sleep, you couldn't keep your mind off Tim. Grabbing your phone from the night stand, you decided to send him a text.

Hey, I know you're probably busy with you know what, but I just wanted to check up on you after you didn't show up at the coffee shop today Is everything ok?

You knew you wouldn't be able to sleep until he replied you, and knowing him God knows at what time he will reply. With his crazy sleeping pattern and patrolling the streets of Gotham at night, you never knew when to expect an answer.

After grabbing your phone to stare at the text message again, you felt tears burn your eyes. He had left you on read 30 minutes ago. Tim never leaves you on read, ever.

Maybe he realized you were just his little brother's friends who was pathetic and had pathetic feelings for him, and decided he didn't want you around in his life anymore.

There was only two weeks left before the play and you and Tim spent it ignoring each others presences. You tried talking to him, but every time it seemed you were with James around you. You once even obtained success in getting to talk to Tim, and it seemed he was going to tell you why he was being an asshole to you lately, but than James showed up holding a cup of coffee to you, and Tim just said something rude that made your eyes watery and left without saying goodbye once he realized what he had done.

To say you were sad was an understatement. Even Damian, who absolute lotted  the idea of you and his brother liking each other, questioned you both to try and understand what was going on. You, not waiting to spark a fight between them, said there was nothing going on besides two people growing out of their friendship - Damian saw right through your bullshit, and went straight to attacking Tim on the cave after that conversation.

Finally it was opening night. You were a nervous wreck, it was the first opening night of your life. What if people didn't like you? What if you sang out of tune or forgot your lines?

I'm sure you'll do great at the play, y/n.

You found yourself repeating Tim's words in your mind. You reprehended yourself, you shouldn't be thinking about him now, he didn't care about you anymore. Thinking about what you two used to have, a friendship, made your heart hurt. But still, you couldn't help but wonder if he was going to be here tonight, to watch you.

Turns out being on stage dancing and singing around proved to be funnier than you thought. You weren't so nervous anymore after the first half an hour, you were even more excited than ever. Twirling around stage in a baggy button up t-shirt and a blonde wig while singing Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee was one of your favorite parts of the night. 

But then there you were, alone on stage for your solo. It was just you, staring at the audience, you felt like vomiting, but you couldn't give into your nerves now. You were doing great the whole play, or you thought so, you couldn't fail now, it was your moment. 

"There are worst things I could do, hang out with a boy, or two. Even though the neighborhood thinks I'm trashy and no good, I suppose it could be true, but there are worst thinks I could do." You sang while walking towards the fake lockers and grabbing a red notebook, holding it against your chest, a small smiling tugging at your lips as you took small steps "I could flirt with all the guys, smile at them and bet my eyes. Press against them while we dance, make them think they stand a chance then refuse to see it through, that's a thing I'd never do." 

You looked up, spotting a certain raven head boy watching you. So he did come after all, Tim was there in the audience with the rest of his family. You wondered if he was there because he wanted to or because he felt obligated to be there. Damian was sitting there with Dick, Jason, Duke, and Cass, even Barbara and Stephanie were there, maybe he did feel like he had to come. You tried not to think much about it as you kept singing, but you couldn't help but let your thoughts wander to him.

You pressed yourself against the fake wall.

"I don't steal and I don't lie, but I can feel and I can cry. A fact I bet you never knew." you had to pretend to be sad during this part of the scene, but you didn't even had to think much of it as you were sad he wasn't there because of you "But to cry in front of you, that's the worst thing I could do."

You finished the song, waiting for the lights to go out so you could leave the stage. You were feeling terrible.

The play was finally over, you were still wearing the clothes from the last scene, when Damian and his siblings showed up backstage to congratulate you. You smiled brightly at them, thanking every single one from being there tonight to watch you. 

"We will be waiting for you outside." Damian said after you all had agreed to go out for dinner together "You two should talk this whole thing out."

And then he left, leaving you frowning in confusion. What was he talking about?

"Hi." Tim said, appearing in your line of vision, he had stayed quiet and in the back the whole time while his siblings talked to you "You were great tonight."

"Thank you." you replied, not really knowing what to do "Thanks for... coming."

"Of course, I would never miss your big opening night."

You pressed your lips in a thin line, keeping yourself from scoffing and yelling at him for doing this to you. He noticed your behavior, how you shifted your weight from one leg to the other and crossed your arms over your chest.

"I need to go change into normal clothes so..."

You turned around to leave, but he grabbed your upper warm, turning you back around to him. You stared wide eyed at him, noticing how close you two were. He let go of your arm.

"We really need to talk, y/n." He said, he casted his gaze down to the ground, recollecting his thoughts from being so close to you, and then looked back up at you beautiful e/c eyes "I am so sorry for the way I behaved towards you for the past few weeks. I was an asshole."

"You're damned right you were." you huffed in annoyance "Why did you ignore me, Timothy? Did I do something to offend you or something of that sort?"

Tim winced when you said his full name and not just Tim. He couldn't help but feel even worse when he heard the hurt in your voice.

"No. You didn't do anything to offend me or something wrong, at all." 

"Then what is it? What happened?" you questioned him, voice low as your heart was hammering against your chest, honestly afraid of his answer "Please, be honest with me. I promise you after you tell me what it is, I will leave you alone and not bother you anymore."

He shook his head, how could you think he wanted you to leave him alone?

"I don't want you to leave me alone or stop talking to me, y/n." you looked up at him with that same innocent look from the party "I was... I was jealous. I hated that you were spending so much time with... James." Tim spat out the other boy's name "I hated thinking that the two of you were getting closer and closer everyday, and the thought of you dating him... or anyone else for the matter, it made my heart hurt. I don't think you noticed this before, but, y/n, I am hopelessly in love with you."

You parted your lips. Too shocked to form a coherent thought in your head. Tim was in love with you? He returned the feelings you had? What the hell?

"You were jealous." you said

"I was jealous."

"You... you are in love with me." you said again

"I am in love with you." he repeated, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips, he honestly had no idea if this was going to end well or not

You stood still before trowing yourself at him. Your arms hugging his neck as his sneaked around your waist, pulling you from the ground. One leg up while the other was down, you burried your face on his shoulders. 

"I thought you hated me." your voice sounded muffed by his jacket's fabric 

He chuckled in your ear. "I could never hurt you, sweetheart."

You pulled back a little and he placed you on the floor. But your hands never left the other, you kept on touching each other. 

"I am in love with you too, Tim."

Tim's smiled brighter, pulling you in closer. Your hands traveled up to cup his jaw, stroking lovingly his cheek with your thumb. This is how you always wanted to be with him, in his warm embrace. 

He leaned in, closing the distance between your faces, allowing your lips to meet in a sweet kiss. He licked your lips asking for entrance, allowing your thongs to dance across each others mouth. 

You had no idea how long you two kissed each other, you could do this all day long and never get tired of it. When you parted, you rested your foreheads together. 

"You should go get dress or I will just keep kissing you forever." Tim mumbled, his hot breath fanning on your face

You smiled "I won't oppose to that."

He laughed, pecking your lips repeatedly until he pulled away again. 

"I don't think I want my brothers to walk in on us kissing each other, nor do I want our first make out session to be in front of everyone."

You looked up teasingly at him, biting on your lower lip "You want to have a make out session with me?"

Tim thighed his grip on your waist making you gasp as he whispered in your ear.

"I would love to have a make out session with you. Maybe after dinner, I can take you home..."

You nodded your head, a matching smile on both of your lips. You placed a small kiss on his lips before completely pulling away from him. 

"I'll right back."

"And I'll be right here."

You left to get dressed, trying to suppress your happy giggles on the way. Tim stood still, leaning on the wall and smiling to himself, thankful for this play or else he probably wouldn't have told you about his feelings. 

[popculturebuffet]

Star Vs: Monster Bash Review or “Holy Shit Concentrated Into An Episode”

Hello everybody! I’m Jacob Mattingly and welcome back to my tom lucitor retrospective, where I go through every major apperance of everyone’s faviorite demon boy boy. In case you watch my schedule or reguarlly read this blog, and if so thank you.. especially you Kevin your a peach, you’ll know this one got pushed back two weeks because the day it was scheduled.. was the day AFTER the US Capitol Insurgency. So yeah an episode HEAVILY dealing with racisim, with a downer ending and a lot to dig into on the same day a bunch of racists stormed the captail to try and illegally keep another racist in office due to his bullshit claims the electoin was fraud, when it wasn’t he just can’t admit he lost, and their own idocy, violence and hatred was not something I could handle that day and I did some mickey mouse instead.  But while the effects of said riot are still being felt, and unlike many republicans are saying we shouldn’t just “move on” or “try to heal” because the wound needs to be properly examined so the people who carved our country open with a rusty knife can be prosecuted for it, enough time has passed that I can get back on the horse and eat that horse when it comes to this episode. Also expect new tomtrospective weekly with some exceptions till it’s done. So with the real world reasons for the delay out of the way, on with the show.  Previously on Star Vs: Star had a full subplot dealing with her super powered mewberity form, which was now golden and creating bunches of portals. While she wanted to just let it go loose on Eclipsa’s suggestoin, eventually it caused too much damage and Hekapoo was livid when Marco revealed he’d been covering for her and Star, realizing her friend was running himself ragged and ruined a friendship to help her, went to the source of all magic to fix things, metting the baby unicorns and with thier help gaining control over her form. While she does not use it given she JUST got it before this episode, it’s very relevant and makes her come off very stupid but we’ll get to that

In more directly relevant stuff, and our main event, we need to talk about Ms. Henious. Ms. Henious was introduced all the way back in Season 1 as head of St. Olga’s School for Wayward princsesses. She’s voiced by Jessica Walter, aka Malory Archer, Lucille Bluth and .. Fran Sinclair from dinosaurs?

I’ll process that later. Point is she’s a talented lady and voiced Henious perfectly. Henious ran the school as a nightmarish hellhole that stripped away princsesses indviduality when they became too much for their parents. Granted some did genuinely need to be reigned in, Pony went there and so did princess squishy a princess that tried to reinact the plot of face off despite her and star not even being the same species let alone looking remotely similar.. she also liked to say camera phone a lot despite all phones being camera phones for over a decade. 

But again like most reform schools it’s a hell hole dedicated more to beating and psyihholically tourturing the rebel or asshole out of you than actually helping so Star and Marco broke in to break out. It naturally was difficult and strenious but in the process our heroes freed the other girls and Marco became feminsest icon Princess Marco. And Marco’s possible gender fluidity, or being trans,  was well loved and while he was later said to hate the princess marco idntenity later.. I still dont’ quite buy it and feel Disney just wanted to nip any implications in the bud. Because their stupid and often non-inclusive to the queer community and have to be fought to get inclusivity in there half the time. Could’ve been clumsy writing and the writers not getting people really relating to marco possibly being gender fluid or trans, which given this season’s clumsy writing with marco in general I could buy, but i’m banking more on disney, where one executive can somehow stonewall gay representation because apparnetly one guy was the one who objected to enchanting grom fright.. and he can also go fuck himself with an old rhino’s horn. Which horn is up to you. Also we got two major hints at the future iwth her: a creepy mural star found of monsters and Henious being revealed to have cheek marks she supressed with her very own brainwashing machine. 

Our heroes revolution had uintetional side-effects as St.O’s became a party school, though it’s students actually still came back better for the moast part. Henious was thrown out, reduced to sleeping in her car with her manservant gemini and sending Rasticore, a septarian mercinary afer star.. and then carrying his arm around when he got reduced to that.. not because of star but because of a rogue gift card. We don’t have time to unpack that, so she later tried attacking one more time in season 2, in one of the single worst episodes of the series, as she attacked and Marco’s Parents, instead of being concerned about the strange woman and man and lizard man arm attacking thier children, were more concerned about.. tehir cool neighbors. which could’ve been funny but just got frustrating, especially because Marco defended himself well, pointing out while he trashed her school, and gets merchandising rights from princess marco merch, she you know, brainwashed innocent to semi innocent children and was in general horrible and his parents are only humoring her because they were both out of hte loop, which due to this being shortly before star and marco leaves amounts to nothing, and because of the stupid plot. 

So after that we got one more apperance in season 3 with her trying to expose marco as a boy to turn the princsses against him and get her school back.. but it was clearly a desperate and flimsy plan and they knew that already, and don’t care because their accepting. And again have done better without her so she gets thrown out and swore revenge on Marco, and here we are.  Finally, since returning Star’s been more active in monster rights, replacing their old batshit insane and patronizingly racist expert with Buff Frog and starting a position to get royal signatures. Obviously this dosen’t sound like the most effective way to do things but it’s both teenager accurate and not the worst plan i’ve heard from a teenager this week.. granted that’s also because I covered a teenager trying to win back her good for not a lot 23 year old boyfriend by stabbing his current girlfriend he left her for a bunch, so it’s not exactly a high bar to clear. So outside of the golden form thing, which i’ll get to in the review proper why I brought that up, that’s what’s all built up to this the mid season finale. While Stump Day DID come after this, I chose to cover it before it since it both takes place before that and feels out of place in the very story heavy episodes after it. So with that out of the way we’ll be taking a look at the full episode and Star’s horrible, no good, very bad night under the cut. 

We open at the Monster Temple, that place Ludo and Toffee were headquartered at for season 2 and the battle of mewni mini, where Star is holding a PARTY!

This.. this came up when I typed party. I don’t know why and I don’t WANT to know. I mean party is in the name.. is that a party line? Is this phone sex? No.. just no.. I don’t want dirty sweaty pigs in my phone sex.. I want Rocko like a gentlemen. 

Now THAT’S hot. And honestly with what i’ve admitted about myself at this point, can you genuinely tell if i’m joking or not?  Point is Marco and Rich Pidgeon are pitching in. Oh yeah those of you who didn’t get this far in the series, again hi kevin, might wonder wait whose that... well he’s a rich pidgeon, part of the pidgeon kingdom a kingdom of pidgeons that moved into another family’s castle, presumibly killed them, the book wasn’t specific on that and is now just a large bunch of pidgeons that don’t talk human except rich and get all creepy. They also have an excutioner which is as great a visual as you imagine. 

That and Marco tried faking singing rich singing it by shving a pien in his foot and making him sign it.. he didn’t know he was fully sapient but still. But it’s also season 3 marco. The fact he didn’t accidently burn the castle down trying to impress star and being mad when she wasn’t happy he comitted arson is an achievement. Rich apparently holds a grudge but says just kiddng.. maybe.. i’d be prepared for a pidgeon with a machete if I were Marco. Thankfully i’m not.. I mean I hate myself enough. 

Anyways the party is in full swing, as both monsters and mewmans are there. On the mewman sides are the royals we met at the Silver Bell Ball and on the monster side are a bunch of monster teens who look up to star we previously met during the Ludo arc in season 2. Pony arrives bringing a photo booth. And kelly! 

And also Johnny Blowhole...

That dolphin what showed up a few times, including in the comic and the show, like most of it’s supporting cast, just sorta forgot. Also was going to be my porn name, just in case till it ended up attached to a fictonal teenager. Did.. did not think naming a character “blowhole” through did they? 

Anyways the party is at “middle school dance” levels of awkward with the monsters and humans on other sides. Rock seems to be getting ready for a racist tyrade and singles out a yak like monster.. only to instead compliment the guy’s ripped jeans and the two compliment each other on horns... turns out the ones Rock always wear aren’t decorative but part of him due to a boating accident. Shame we never got more of this kid. that’s a good kid I tell you what.  But honestly and since the moment is right given their all in this episode.. we never get a lot of the other royals outside of tom and star PERIOD. While Penelope would show up one last time and Larry would make a cameo for the most part their just.. background filler. Even this pettitoin arc was two episodes long. Rich is BRAND new and he gets way more focus.. and even he only gets to show up again for the big “Gondor calls for aid moment” in season 4 where star summoned whoever she could get on short notice. And is the ONLY royal to besides Ponyhead. Larry has an intresting enough design but the underwater kingdom only got featured in the deep trouble tie in comic that got cut short, and he wasn’t created yet so he doesen’t even show up for it. Jagg’s is such a footnote to the creators she dosen’t ever show up after this, and finally Rock, despite being star’s COUSIN and despite his kingdom being specifically mentioned as the hardest to make sympathetic to eclipsa during her own entirely ignored arc trying to win over the other kingdoms, and despite it being where River comes from and thus possibly providing some more insight into that awesome, awesome man.. we get nothing. Hell the Cloud Kingdom of the Ponyeheads ONLY gets two visits despite being home of one of the main cast.. god I just realized Ponyhead was part of the main cast. 

So while I grapple with that, Star figures the punch is too warm and while Marco goes to get ice, she tries to remind him she can do magic and accidently puts it in your standard cartoon ice block.. and being star gets her tounge stuck. Thankfully her savior comes in the form of tom who being.. you know.. tom.. can simply melt it down and reminds her he’s been there the whole time. She’s just been a bit distracted with you know, trying to ease centuries of racial tension in a well meaning but ultimately pointless at best and risky at worst, partay. And dosen’t seem to get WHY she dosen’t want to dance.. even if they do have a REALY fucking cute moment where he leans in to kiss her, she catches him on it.. then blows a raspberry into his mouth when he does and smooches him on the cheek a bunch. 

But the whole thing leaves him as a grumpus venting to marco and boiling the punch.. though at least Marco gets to use that ice now so silver linings and all that. And when marco tries to explain he tells him he dosen’t “talk politics”

My baby boy.. i’m so disapointed in you. And Marco points out as he leaves “your a prince everything you do is political. “. Which is.. HALF true. I mean tom going to the bathroom or eating a taco or taking his grandpa fo ra walk on his leash so he dosen’t gouge anyones eyes out isn’t political.. but he’s also not wrong that being the half demon half mewman son of two royals, DOES mean tom can come off political and one previous episode which he made a cameo in even had Tom being profiled, with a shopkeep who shoed out another monster kid tried that on tom.. only to realize who he was dealing with and beg for mercy he probably only got because Tom’s trying to be a better person now. And I don’t think i’ts even malcious on tom’s part, tom isn’t the most empathetic guy. He’s nice, he’s sweet, and once he knows you he can be really thoughtful.. but as we’ve seen throughout this retrospective.. empathy is something he’s struggled with. He stalked star because he didn’t see HER side of him creeply and obessively persuing her until Marco got through to him. He missed the point of his therapy assignment, seeing it as a goal to get passed instead of hwat brian intended: for him to geninely make amends with someone he hurt. He didn’t get that while star didn’t, at the time, want to date him ignoring her would hurt her... though that on’es not on him. He’s not a bad guy at all but he’s not at all great at reading people or being selfless.

 He’s getting there, stump day showed him put stars needs before Marco’s and not out of any selfish dick measuring contest but because he knew what she wanted and what made her happy, but it’s hard to have empathy for a problem you don’t get how bad it is. To tom it’s just getting stopped once in a while and then having to glower or literally roast someone. To these monsters... it’s a life of being denied a decent standard of living, housing and being treated as a crminal and a beast just for existing. Tom has a fancy castle, loyal subjects, tons of money.. his privlage has insulated him from the real dangers of being the minority he is, of getting beaten up by the cops or arrested just for being a monster. And yes i’m using real world paralells.. but so does the end of this episode so shhh. It’s also a moral that hits home since as a white person, the last year has hit me HARD with just how much I didn’t know about the racial situation in america and how complacient i’d become. I wasn’t actively racist.. but like many americans I had the bad tendency to forget the horrible things that happpend on a daily basis to people of color in this country when it got out of the news. Privlage can blind you, and I cannot speak for if it does so for any real life minorties as i’m not touching a subject i’m not qulaified to talk on due to being super white with a ten foot pole, but I can speak for me that sometimes you just.. dont’ notice a problem unless i’ts happening to you. And while it has happened to tom it’s such a minor inconvience he probably just forgets about it and moves on. And these next two episodes with him, though we have some plot stuff to get too before we get back to Tom in feburary, are him getting his bubble popped and realizing just WHAT Star has been fighting against. And Star’s own privlage will be an issue later.. but we’llg et to that in it’s own time.  So while Tom skulks off Rich startles Marco to get him to do his kung fun hand pose “the sword hand dance” and everyone uses it to dance which Marco understandably objects to until kelly asks him to dance. Cue adorable ship tease.. again this is why i’m thrownig in the kelco episode in the next batch: because the trajectory of this relationship eeerily lines up with tom episodes. No sense avoiding the ONE other episode about the ship , especially if i’m going out of my way to cover the Meteora arc on top of it and my other 80 projects. And regular coverage. And comissions. And you get the idea it’s a lot but i’m happy to do it. 

Meanwhile we meet Slime, a friendly slime monster who introduces himself to penelope and her massive spider bite... and then drips a bit giving her the wrong impression. Thankfully.. this does not turn into the PG-Rated versoin of BLue from the heathers musical. 

No he just was offering to aloe up her spiderbite, and she’s all too happy to accept since her family never thought about it.. though as we see next season their not against it suprisingly. They are still dicks though. But not racist, though that’s a very low bar to clear and only gives them credit because mewni as a whole is pretty racist when it comes to Monsters. Point is I hate their parents but love these ship as the two share some ship tease and go downstairs.. only to get attacked.  Meanwhile, Marco’s getting a goblin dog while being watched by Henious.. who despite Gemini’s objections.. no longer cares about her cheeks as she grins sinesterly and has him play her music, some heavy metal. FORESHADOWING!

Back at the party, Star adreses her public and is all proud and blushy.. till Penelope stumbles in, covered in scars, telling the crowd something took Slime.. and both sides start blaming one another, especially since it turns out a LOT of the monsters have gone missing. So with everything she worked towards and had achieved crumbling, Star calms the crowd and says she’ll investigate. Outside Marco is getting a goblin dog with roy, and wondering why he has strawberry, who orders a strawberry.. who wants that? And then decides to get one out of curiosity which I would but i’m also fat and love strawberries so i’m not a beacon of good decisionmaking. 

So Star grabs him before he can roll that metaphorical dice and passes tom who tries to downplay her concerns and get her to go make out, thinking that’s what’s going on despite that.. making no sense, as a ton of them are missing and 6 is a bit much for polyamory.. I mean it works for some people 

But not everyone can be a majestic space grandma whose also a caterpillar. And their too young to orgy so that’s out too. Point is Tom is an idiot this time and Star RIGHTFULLY calls him out for belitting her cause, not really caring about it, or the other teens who are in danger right now from god knows what and tells him to either help or get out of the way. 

So while Tom licks his well earned wounds, Star and Marco journey into the depths and find a campsite with fresh dog eared pages indicating whoevers behind the abudictions is not only sapient, but still here... oh and it somehow gets worse as they find out WHOSE behind it. 

And a second question you might be having: Who dis. Well this is Mina Loveberry, solarian warrior, whose a legend in Mewni and was one of star’s childhood heroes who she found wondering around homeless and clearly not mentally well in the park on earth.. and then tried to conquer it, but the electoral process stopped her... I don’t know why but a half crazed maniac being defeated by due electoral process makes me feel all warm and fuzzy right now, on this specific day this is coming out late on. Hmmmm.. INTERESTING aint it? 

Point is Mina is a super powerful, super not in her right mind super warrior, who is naturlaly the kidnapper, as this episode also reveals she’s violently racist and assuemed something was up and whiel Star, who despite said cou still loves and respects her and gets she’s not well, tries to talk her down it increasingly becomes clear there’s no reasoning with her. And really with most racists.. there isn’t. Racisim isn’t something that’s rational and while some people are just indocrinated at a young age and CAN be turned around on it.. some are just so deeply up their own ass with hatred you can’t reason with them or save them. You just have to stop them. Via impeaching them, making sure they get called out and taken out of office.. or in this case using rainbows on them.  But we’ll have to wait a second as a bunch of debris falls on mina taking her out!

.. Only to reveal Henious and while Marco’s willing to fight her and her posse, Raasticore grabs star and henious hooks him up to the brainwash machine, probably planning to kill him with it while playing the music

But before she can kill or do worse to one of our heroes.. the door behind them opens up.. and reveals a child’s play room. 

And Henious.. gives up on the attack and enters, disturbing Gemini as she looks around in what’s easily one of the best scene sin the entire series: her slow walk, the way the animation follows her as it sinks in just what Metora might be.. and her picking up two dolls, the ones seen above.. her dolls to Gemini’s increasing discomfort. And while the animation is stellar and utterly moving as we slowly put the pieces together... it’s Walter’s delivery that REALLY STUNS.Gone is the harsh, unforgiving nightmarish woman we’ve known.. and instead is someone whose confused.. and remembering. Remembering WHY she has those cheek marks, remembering this was her room, her home.. and those were her parents. She remembers now.. and Mina rises to say of course she did “I knew you’d be back here one day meteora!” And as Gemini tries to refute this.. Meteora agrees with MIna, no longer henious at last freed form her deep and abusive brainwashing we’ll cover soon enough. And deeply confused. And as everyone else is deeply confused... Mina, not realizing this whole thing was covered up, again we’ll get to that soon too, spells it out for them and the audience in case you missed it. When Star asks how Eclipsa plays into any of this? “Don’t you ding dongs know anything? She’s her mamma!”  (Marco and Star stare in shock as it sinks in) Marco: “Wait HENIOUS is a princess?!”  Star: “she’s a butterfly”

Yeah quite obviously this is one of the biggest wham episodes in the entire series. In one moment we not only find out Henious is indeed a butterflfy as fans thought.. but Eclipsa’s daughter, half monster, and her entire existance raises questions of how much her family hid and if not WHO DID. I mean some of you alreayd know the answer but the rest of you can wait a week.. or a few mintues it’s hinted at soon enough. Point is Star has questions.. questions the violent racist whose pretty messed up in the head for a variety of the reasons and spent decades hunting her.. is not willing to hear out and instead prepares to smite her. While Star tries DESPERATLEY to talk her friend out of this it’s very clear Mina’s not going to listen... so Star rainbow fists her.. and prepares to face her former friend and inspiration for Meteora’s saftey and the answers she BADLY needs right now. Oh and just in case you thought “oh well the magical girl who sounds like amy sedaris can’t be that big a threat”... Yeah I didn’t mention broly for nothing. 

Mina bulked up. Meet Solarian Mina. And like the Legendary Super Sayian form from Dragon Ball.. i’ts a beserker of a form that turns the already obessive and insane Mina.. into an unstoppable rage fuled killing machine with horrifying levels of power who can beat down anyone nearbye. And unlike Broly, where he was just a one in a million fluke in both versions... Mina was PLANNED to be this. The solarian program was something Eclipsa’s mom came up with, a series of spells that slowly turn the target into a rampaging super soldier. It’s like if Nuke from marvel comics, a vietnam era version of captain america who dind’t turn out so good, was INTETIONAL; 

As you can see it removes fear.. but also the targets concisce, so Mina is incapable of empathy or being cure dof her racisim. Solaria turned her from a humble volunteer just hoping ot help and improve her station into the crazed monster star now faces.  And as the Broly comparision should make clear... yeah Star dosen’t do so good and neither does Marco. She shrugs off Star’s hits and while botht he kids and meteora escape, both just piss Mina off MORE, and put star in more danger as she’s thrown around like a ragdoll.  She then runs into tom who shows off his growht: While he was a dick up there.. unlike before where he assumed he was always the wronged party.. he realized he crossed a line and while he dosen’t know WHY he did, is still willing to apologize and presumibly talk about it. A bit clueless yes but it’s effort and his tone is sincre so it’s less “I’m apologizing for whatever I guess” bullshit and more “I genuinely don’t know wha ti did wrong please tell me so I can say sorry”.. which given how awkard tom is with people and how I pointed out his trouble relating to them over htis retrospective, is the more beliviable one.  Naturally while Star does appricate it she’s kinda busy.. and when Tom see’s what’s going on he leaps in with NO hesitation. And given how close the luictors once were and are again with the butterflies it’s doubtful he hadn’t heard of mina so he likely KNOWS what he’s going up against..a nd dosen’t care. His girlfriend needs his help and this person’s trying to hurt her. That’s all he needs to kick her ass. Or try.. unlike with the z warriors.. our heroes don’t win this one. Tom tries a really cool move i’m dubbing the onyx coffin, a black coffin with runes and chains.. that does nothing to her. She breaks out and our heroes flee and Mina causes a massive ruckuss above, and the only reasons our heros don’t die.. is that the knights and Rhombulus of the high comission arrive.  And since the high comission are going to be vastly important a refresher: The high comission were created by glossaryck, the little man who lives in stars book who used to be voiced by an asshole and next season is voiced by keith motherfucking david, to police the multiverse and it’s various issues. The four we know are Lekmet: a goat man who died last season and controlled entropy and could heal at the cost of his own life hence the death, Hekapoo, a close assiocate of marcos who controls the scissors beings use to cross dimensions and can do so herslef effortlessly, Omnitraxus Prime, a powerful and giant antler skulled being who watches space time and timelines and is voiced by Karl Weathers so...

And Rhombulus, a diamond headed he-man reject with snakes for hands becaue his dad is a well documented dickhead.. no really that’s the entire explination i the book of spells: Glossaryck turned his hands to snake to teach him the lesson i’ts hard to get through life with snake hands. He’s a gung ho guy who imprisons the wrost of the worst criminals thus his presence here as Mina clearly had a falling out with the comission and thus flees.  So while Star and Tom are given blankets afterwords and some cocoa, Tom comforts her and admits if nothing else.. he gets it now, having been finally faced with the type of horrible shit monsters have had to deal with in the past and sees why his girlfriend tried hard to help it. But Star.. realizes she can’t fix this that easy. That she dosen’t know enough and clearly ther’es even more than she ever could’ve thought possible she has ot know if she’s going to fix this.. and that it’s not an EASY problem to fix. You really CAN’T fix racisim you can just make society better, but you’ll never be rid of people like Mina. Though this arc will.. yeah in one of the more baffling decisions Mina is given this huge reindrocution, with Amy Sedaris showing that while a very funny lady and a very talented actress as bojack had previously shown off for both.. she can be FUCKING TERRIFYING. But nope, she’s just..g one outside of a cameo, gets beatne off screen and dosen’t become big bad for a season. And I get it, the metora arc needed room.. but you had a WHOLE EXTRA EPISODE to have her defeat mina. Inastead you used it for Marco Jr which amounted to almost nothing and could’ve been saved for season 4 wher eit probably woudln’t of been terrible. I”ll get to that one some day. Point is it’s bad storytelling. 

So yeah Star’s feeling lost, her family history is in flux, she got beaten badly, not horribly injrued but still lost handily, her party ruined and  she was hit with the realization her plans were overly idealistic. Well meaning sure but a party was never going to cure this. Oh and Rhombluus naturally isn’t coming clean about why the temple is off limits or what’s going on here so that dosen’t help.  And somehow.. IT STILL GETS WORSE. The Wizard Cops try to take the monsters in , profling them and not having done so and star thankfully talks them out of it but the monster kids turn down any afterparty or anything. They get she means well tbut hte moment’s over. And their not even excesivley sad.. their just.. used to the police treating them like this. Like less than human, like automatic suspects when THEY were the victims. IT’s nothing new... and god does this feel relevant as hell.

And this i where I meant Star’s privlage bites her: While not as bad as tom, it took some very harsh reality for her to see that solving racisim.. is not only nigh imposisble but not that easy. To her it was easy as a party and friendship and what’s worked before in her fairly shelted world. Advetnures or not she’s still a princess whose never experinced prejudice. In both worlds she’s in the majority. It’s probably why Marco conttoned on to monster racism in seconds during “Menipendence Day’ when Star hadn’t her whole life: to Marco, whose latix and thus dealing with all kinds of racist shit his whole life, it was easier to pick it up. He’s firmly part of his culture.. and thus probably firmly aware of the racism he faces. Star is so insulated she just dosen’t get it till it nearly beat her to death. So yeah Star’s at her lowest point, having failed to make things better, the answer to her questions being lost and not sure what’s real. Metora on the other hand as they dodge the cops.. has ascended. As Gemini calls her henious once last time.. she says that’s not her name. 

“My name is meteora”

SHe’s been dreaming the wrong dream.. and it’s long past time she woke up. 

Final Thoughts;  Monster Bash.. is one of the best episodes in the series. Unlike a lot of Seasons 3 and 4 it dosen’t suffer from lack of proper payoff, as the next few episodes deal with how the fuck any of this is happening and why the fuck any of it happened. Mina’s absence nonwithstanding.. this is one of the series best and most gripping arcs. And the swerve is great: you think i’ts Henious doing the kindappings, only for her not to be the threat again just yet. And for her to be something far more. It’s just masterful, starting iwth fun hyjinks and ending in one of the best nad most nightmarish fights in the series if not the best, watching as our heroes slowly but surely LOOSE.. and THEN it gets worse. Out and out a must watch for the series and a sad sign of what it COULD’VE been had it moved past it’s worst insitncts next season and become what i should’ve been.  Next week: We take a tom break as Eclipsa nad Mon investigate all of this and we get the SECOND biggest wham episode in the series. 

Until the next rainbow, be excellent to each other.

[sweets-r-cool]

Not the Right Birthday Present

Bakugo Katsuki x Reader

so- I think this would’ve been better if I didn’t get played by google bc when I clicked off of full screen all my work got reset at some point so it’s not as good bc I forgot what it said but yeah-

Warning: Angst

A birthday is supposed to be a happy day filled with presents, laughter, friends, sweets, and fun.

It took a certain kind of person to hate birthdays, and as much as Bakugo would say he hated how you and the extras that followed him around would make a huge deal out of his birthday, he couldn’t shake that stupid light and warm feeling that captured his chest.

The same one he would get every bright smile you’d send his way. The same one he got when you kissed his face more times than he could count, bouncing up and down as you gushed with excitement when he got down on one knee, asking you to be his for life. That same feeling he got when he pushed that gold ring onto your finger as you did the same to him. 

Looking back on it, you were generally the cause for that damn feeling that invaded his chest. Even Bakugo couldn’t stop himself from genuinely laughing as you wiped cake crumbs off your face after tripping as you tried and failed to cake him on the two of you’s wedding day. 

Birthdays were supposed to be filled with happiness, not grief, regret, confusion, and hurt. God, did it hurt.

All Bakugo felt now was the opposite. Heavy, like gravity had betrayed him as his footsteps were heavier than ever before. His whole body was fatigued from fighting against the strong pull that made him feel like he was going to fall into the ground. Hopeless and unmotivated, the ash blonde didn’t even want to get out of bed.

 Was there a point? 

You weren’t there to complain at him to make breakfast. You weren’t there to make breakfast yourself, not standing the kitchen in one of his shirts that covered your entire torso as well as a good part of your thighs. He wouldn’t be able to sneak up on you and hug you from behind, burying his nose in the crook of your neck, feeling your warmth and the stove.

Things were just cold. And empty.

Bakugo laid in bed, exhausted for so many reasons.

...

Things were so calm, so dark it was nearly impossible to see anything, even if you squinted. Part of the perks of a house just barely on the edge of the city, away from the blinding lights and the loud noises of bustling night life.

Things were quiet, save for your rhythmic breathing as your chest moved up and down.

Out of nowhere, you shot up, and so did Bakugo who was unable to sleep already due to a weird feeling in his chest. Not the warm one, but rather one that told him it wouldn’t be good to sleep right now, a sort of anxiety. 

You had shot up due to the fact things had changed in the matter of one (1) second. There was an explosion, followed by two (2) more and now things weren’t calm, or dark, or peaceful. 

Peeks of a dim orange light shone through the blinds that were previously closed. A groan naturally came from you as you moved to reach for the blue light shining from your phone as Bakugo looked through the window.

You sighed with a slightly laugh, “Hm, we really can’t rest. Huh, Bub?”

In a matter of ten (10) or even less minutes, you and Bakugo were suited up and in your cars.

Out of all the times, 3 am was when the villains chose to launch a large attack on the better part of the city. But, of course, because that was what villains were. Nothing but inconveniences until Bakugo beat the shit out of them and got them to a jail cell.

“So, what exactly is going on?” you asked Deku on a call connected to the Bluetooth of the car as Bakugo sped- definitely going over the speed limit, but it wasn’t like it mattered at the moment.

The green-haired hero had barely managed to explain before more explosions went off and the line went dead. You were worried, but there was no choice but to push it down, as you were already at the scene. 

It looked like the apocalypse. 

Fire was everywhere, cars crashed, building crumbled, there wasn’t a bit of glass in sight left unshattered. 

The causes were at the center of it all, all the chaos. Countless heroes were already injured, but those who weren’t passed out stood as best as they could against the villains.

You and Bakugo had your work cutout for you.

That didn’t stop from an animalistic grin working its way onto Bakugo’s face as he warmed up with a few smaller explosions. 

~

It was now late into the morning. No one was entirely sure what time it was, but the sun was visible making things a lot easier. The known villains had finally been apprehended, but the damage was done.

It was time to check for survivors, the worst part in most heroes opinion. It always left a sad feeling inside of them, knowing how many lives were not saved. There was still fire everywhere, and of course, there was still a chance of villains roaming around that hadn’t been discovered yet, no one was letting their guards down. 

You had been able to keep a relatively neutral expression this entire time, not an ounce of fear evident. Though, you knew it was simply because there Katsuki was beside you. 

Bakugo had felt the same way, only before he noticed one of the attacks getting way too close to taking your life, had you not narrowly dodged it.

The aura around you always made him feel like everything was gonna be okay, at least eventually. In his eyes, you were the meaning of resilience, always bouncing back from any situation. The ash blonde was trying to keep that in mind.

Being a hero was tough, everyone knew. 

After more deaths of those close to you than should have been normal, you were still fine. Still able to proceed with life as normal.

It was different at this moment.

You had flinched significantly when you realized there was a little girl trapped in a burning building. There was no doubt, the building was extremely unstable, and would crumble any minute. The gash going from your collarbone to your shoulder didn’t look good, so Bakugo immediately stepped up.

“I’ll go,” he stated, already on the way before you stopped him.

Time was running out quick, “No, I’ll go,” you said, pushing both hands on his chest as you looked directly in his eyes pleadingly.

“You’re injured, dumbass,” he scoffed, continuing despite you still trying to block him.

You sighed, pushing him harder, “I’m going, Katsuki,” you pressed, “You know that you’re sweating like hell right now, it’s not worth that risk.”

You moved off him when he stopped. He hated that you were right, he didn’t like this. Not at all. He wanted to do it.

You smiled, about to run off before Bakugo had caught your wrist in his larger hand. You turned, “Katsuki-”

He cut you off, “Just come back to me, alright?”

You nodded, “Of course, I have things planned for your birthday next week, but I can give you one of the presents early later,” you teased, smiling even as you parted, getting closer to the girl and farther from him as you entered the building immediately working on getting to her.

There was far too many things the both of you noticed that went unsaid. However, there were reasons they went unsaid. 

The reality of the situation was far from good, or even okay. It was worse than ever. You’d both known from the start a lot of people had died, and were going to die. But it was also that Bakugo had noticed the way you shook, as if you had been freezing.

It was fear.

You had noticed Bakugo’s quirk was overused, as well as the fact his arm was definitely broken.

Bakugo couldn’t have gone. It was simple as that. If he’d gone it would just be stupid, putting everyone at risk. He might not have been able to carry the girl, or his quirk- which again, was overused- could’ve gone haywire, setting off explosions. Though the latter wasn’t likely, it was still a risk that shouldn’t be taken.

Bakugo didn’t like the unsureness in your smile, and definitely not the way it completely faded from your face the moment you turned. 

It was because you knew that the building might not just crumble. 

It had been one minute since you had gone into the building, Bakugo knew because he was subconsciously counting. It had been one minute, and he was being dragged away from the building by three (3) other heroes.

Something felt feral in him, he snapped, “What- What the fuck are you bastards doing?!” 

“It’s not safe, Ground Zero Sir!” one of them shouted, struggling against Bakugo’s thrashing. 

“Of- fucking- course, it’s not, but I’ll be fine outside!” the blonde hero screamed, the heroes- despite outnumbering him- could only hold him down on the spot that was far enough they wouldn’t be fatally injured, but still too close to the range of which they could be hit by flying debris and injured pretty bad.

“What do you mean, Sir?” another one questioned, “that building could blow up, it’s an apartment building so there’s a chance of one of the water heaters exploding. That could kill anyone.”

The rest of the world seemed to numb for Bakugo. Everything always went quiet before the storm.

Bakugo had to watch as the building exploded just like the other heroes had said. 

Bakugo had to watch as the event that most likely costed him the love of his live’s life unfolded in front of him.

He had to watch as all his light in the world shrived to nothing but ash and debris. A part of him still had hope despite the burning hole in his being. 

Bakugo tugged himself out of the heroes’ grasps, running towards the pile of broken concrete. Your quirk should’ve saved you somehow. In some way, it did something. That was probably what happened, right?

Bakugo’s being was shaking as he dug, pushing chunks of broken walls off. He had no idea where you were, but he’d find you. Finally, the blonde saw a piece of your costume, he moved more debris until he was able to uncover your limp body.

You were already gone.

Bakugo hand quivered as he moved hair out of your face. “Y-Y/n...” things were getting blurry, “Y/n, wake up,” the blonde pleaded. 

This couldn’t be happening. This was some cruel joke you were pulling to get back at him for something he did, probably. 

Bakugo’s breath was quickening in an unhealthy fashion, “W-Wake up, you damn-” it was like bitter weights filled Bakugo’s mouth as he lacked the ability to think about anything other than your name. “Y/n?!” he began to shake you a little.

You had so much more stuff left to do. So much to do together. Bakugo’s jaw clenched as he held you closer to him. His breath hitched, it felt like he was being stabbed in the stomach repeatedly. 

This couldn’t be real. It couldn’t be.

This was some cruel joke. Maybe even a dream. He really wanted it to be.

...

Bakugo woke up. He was sweating and his lungs hurt, he was breathing quick but he refused to open his eyes.

He didn’t want to take in reality. He might’ve been forced to do that if he did open his eyes.

A feathery touch to his cheek made him flinch. Prying his eyes open as he was unable to understand what was going on this very moment. “Hey, Bub,” your soft, just over a whisper voice cooed, “It’s your birthday!” you giggled, sitting upright on the bed besides him.

Bakugo felt the warmth invade his chest, only slightly this time as you continued, “I know you don’t want to wake up right now, but Mina, and the boys will be over later in the morning.” You glowed, your cheeks slightly flushed from how happy you were for a birthday that wasn’t even yours as you continued to rake your hands through Bakugo’s ash blonde locks.

Bakugo grunted when he felt his lips turn upwards. Not wanting you to see, he moved to bury his head in your lap, eliciting a giggle from you, as you continued to stroke his hair.

When he wrapped his arms around you somehow despite the position your were in, you scoffed playfully. “I woke you up for a reason, silly,” you admitted, ignoring Bakugo’s grunt of protest when you began to move to get up, “Please, Bub? I wanted to show you something before I go,” you pleaded.

Begrudgingly, Bakugo let you go and only after a second or two that you got up, he did too, following you to the piano. He scoffed with a smirk, crossing his arms as he leaned on the wall nearby. That piano was something you bought completely out of impulse, promising you’d learn, but the only thing you did learn was Hot Cross Buns. It was more like furniture to look at, only there for the aesthetic but never actually played.

You tucked a piece of hair behind your ear as you positioned yourself to play.

Bakugo thought you looked angelic at that moment, but he was sure that the sounds you were about to make weren’t.

However, the ash blonde stood corrected as you played ‘Happy Birthday’ in a tune that wasn’t simple, but rather more than just the basic keys involved. Some of the noted dragged in to each other in a nice harmony, while some of the others were short and quick but worked perfectly nonetheless. The sound was actually elegant, light, and beautiful, some more words Bakugo would be able to describe you with, even if he didn’t say it.

Your voice- also light and airy- worked well with the piano, maybe you could’ve been a singer if you tried that route instead of becoming a hero.

It was now that Bakugo realized, you simply were his light. You didn’t just cause him to feel that light and warm feeling, it was that you lit his life up and gave it warmth.

It was when the song came to a close, Bakugo felt something was off.

“Happy Birthday, my love,” was all he heard before everything went dark. Bakugo, was most definitely awake. So, why did it go dark?

An overwhelming feeling of dread filled Bakugo to the core.

It was freezing, as he had already broken into a cold sweat. He was nauseous.

Bakugo reached around for a light switch, his pupils dilating smaller when he was blinded by the artificial lights in the ceiling.

He caught sight of the clock on the wall.

3 am.

It mocked him, being awake at this hour for no reason at all.

Bakugo dragged himself to bed, dropping onto it without bothering to pull the blankets up despite his cold body.

He shut his eyes.

...

This time the ash blonde was woken up by a series of loud knocks. Strangely, the knocks were not from his front door, but rather right outside his bedroom door. Bakugo groaned, reaching around the bed for warmth, the blanket had fallen somewhere too far for him to find without opening his eyes, so his next source of warmth would be you.

Sleep weighed down his eyes just as much as his mind. He reached so far across the bed he only reached the other edge of it. You weren’t there.

Not anymore.

The thought sent Bakugo’s eyes opening in panic. Where were you? Why weren’t you there?

Another pang of pain went through his chest at the realization. 

You weren’t ever gonna be there, never again. You were cold, flashes of your lifeless e/c eyes appeared in Bakugo’s brain, hitting him with a wave of nausea. A strangled sob came from the ash blonde’s throat as fresh tears began to fall from his crimson eyes. 

He was never going to hold you in his arms, he was never going to eat your sometimes shitty food, he was never going to see you again. Bakugo would never feel that same warm and light feeling again.

He couldn’t breath. It felt like bile was scratching up the inside of his throat. The knocks had stopped, most likely after the loud sobs filled the room. Instead, it slowly opened, revealing Kirishima with a deep frown on his face. 

He got inside the house with a spare key you’d given him, but he tried to give Bakugo at least a little bit of space by knocking. It was clear he wouldn’t be able to do that.

The words that left Kirishima’s mouth in a sad attempt to get his usually standoffish best friend to stop crying went unheard by the blond who had his face buried in his face.

The rest of the Bakusquad- now turned into the ‘take care of Bakugo squad,’ was waiting in the living room, a solemn atmosphere weighed down on them as they were forced to listen to yet another round of sobs from their normally angry dead friend.

It had been a full week since you died, and Bakugo still felt in denial when he dreamed of you. It was his only peaceful time. He had barely eaten any of the food the Bakusquad had brought him, but it was enough to keep him alive.

They all knew in the back of their minds that Bakugo hadn’t known it’d been a week. He was on an emotionless autopilot when he was crying. Not only did your death hurt the Bakusquad horribly, but the state it left on of their other friends in. He wasn’t even himself anymore without you, just a mere shell.

Kirishima sighed, he was gonna save his birthday surprise until he felt a little bit better, or at least until Bakugo stopped sobbing, but the redhead couldn’t see when that would be.

He unlocked Bakugo’s phone, knowing the password because of you, and pulled up a video from a hidden file. Bakugo didn’t spend enough time on his phone for him to notice a file he never made.

Bakugo was still crying when he heard your voice, the fact he’d never hear it again made him confused. Then he realized it was the video on his phone.

Bakugo shut himself up upon hearing you, still crying, just quiet.

“Okay!” you grinned at the camera, a smirk on your face. “It’s currently... March 29...?” you questioned, checking your phone for confirmation and nodding when you knew you were correct.

You continued, looking back up, “Today is day one (1) of learning piano for my dear Katsu!” you grinned, a ghost of a smile prodded at Bakugo’s mouth, but it never showed, “He got mad when i bought the piano out of impulse- so I’m learning so he’ll owe me like a million kisses!” you proudly proclaimed, eyes sparkling, so different from the last image of them, forever burned in Bakugo’s brain. 

You stretched, “I guess I should be talking to the camera like I talk to you, so- uh- I’ll do that?” you giggled, “Okay! Back to the task at hand! I want to learn a bunch of songs eventually but for now I’ll focus on Happy Birthday and maybe your favorite song?”

Watching you do all this made the tears run dry, you really wanted Bakugo to be happy on his Birthday. 

Bakugo’s red eyes remained glued to the screen before the last part, “I know it’s not your birthday right now, but that’s when you’ll be seeing this. So, Happy Birthday, my love!” you beamed. 

You’d done all this, spent all that time learning piano for him and yet you never got to play it for him in real life.

Flashes of last night came pouring back in. Was it a dream? That same single phrase echoed in his mind like a mantra, “Happy Birthday, my love.” That was what you said to him in the dream- or was it real life?

Bakugo couldn’t tell.

He as much as he wanted to be happy on his birthday like you’d wanted, he just couldn’t do it. Not when the only thing he really wanted was for you to be alive. Not when he just wanted you to be okay. Now you weren’t, Bakugo wasn’t okay.

He wasn’t sure he ever would be.

Was it so much to ask for you to be with him on his birthday? He didn’t even want cake or present. Everything would’ve meant nothing to him if you were here. You were his world, his everything. Now without you, there was nothing but gray.

You were gone, and that left Bakugo broken, empty, and cold.