#wooyoung does it a lot less intensely...in a good way

[sxcret-garden]

CAN YOU PLS DO A MOST LIKELY TO BE INTO DRY HUMPING HEHE

ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY YES ANON I LOVE DRY HUMPING DJBDJJXJX

Most

Mingi

Yeosang

San

Seonghwa

Jongho

Yunho

Hongjoong

Wooyoung

Least

Mingi the dry humping enthusiast!! For him, Yeo and San the activity is definitely something that'll satisfy them on its own, like they'll be more than happy to have you rut against them fully clothed (or the other way around) and get the both of you to finish just like that. Something about sitting in each other's lap, the fabric of your clothes still separating you and just going from a heavy makeout session over to chasing your highs like that is just so insanely hot to them??? I feel like Mingi especially would go crazy from the sight of you on top of him alone, even more so if you're wearing something he thinks you look sexy in (this can range from lingerie to one of his shirts btw, he thinks you're sexy in practically anything). For Yeosang the whole intensity of it stems from the fact that you're fully clothed and didn't even get to the point of taking clothes off cause you needed him so bad. San feels a lil less intensely about it, but still enjoys it as a standalone way to have sex every now and then, preferrably paired with some soft making out and hands up in his hair or fingertips exploring the other's shapes.

As for Seonghwa, I think he usually doesn't find it all that enticing, unless he's subbing. Then oh boy does he get off of this so fast??? Maybe a bit similar to Yeosang, he just finds it so hot that you're pleasuring yourself on him right then and there, without even undressing him first? And I guess in part the fact that it's restricting him from being inside you is also smth he enjoys, just being denied what he really wants, in instead having to be pliant for you as you chase your own high on top of him and wanting to be a good boy for you.

Jongho and Yunho feel very similarly about this, though I think Jongho still enjoys it a tad more than Yunho - they're not indifferent to dry humping, but it's really not more than a nice part of foreplay for them. They need more than that to get off (except maybe on the rare occasion that they're subbing, like imagine either of them cumming in their pants and what it'd do to them mentally??? 🫣 anywayyy), but won't stop you from grinding on their bulges a few times while you're making out. UNLESS!!! We're talking sleepy morning dry humping, Yunho certainly won't say no to that, and Jongho is sold. Get ready for little morning voice whines, especially from the latter, tho Yunho won't be completely quiet either, as you're riding them out of sleepiness and into both your highs.

Both Hongjoong and Wooyoung strike me as guys who are not exactly fans of dry humping. Sure, they'll be up for it if you're into it, but it's not something they'd spend a lot of time on otherwise. Maybe you can get Hongjoong to enjoy it when he's really exhausted and as you're having a soft makeout session with him one thing leads to another, but that too will be a rare case (IF it happens though, he'll let you hear the prettiest breathy moans-). As for Wooyoung... maybe when he's completely drunk on you already he'll enjoy watching you grind against him for longer periods of time, but I just don't think he has the patience for this cjnxxnnx (so if you wanna dry hump him, you gotta make him be good for you 👀)

[maximura]

[butterflyyeo]

drunk in love

pairing - yeosang x fem reader

genre - fluff, angst (?)

tw - lots of alcohol consumption, swearing

wc - 10k

side ships - seongjoong, yungi

a/n -- was meant to be angst but turned into fluff... im trying my best to get better at writing angst aaaah. but please enjoy this for now <3 thanks for letting me tag you @iminchaosnow !!

------------------------------------------- you had known kang yeosang for nearly two years now. two, dreadfully slow and exhausting years.it was your final year of high school when he transferred to your school, he was a close family friend of wooyoung's. his parents had spoken highly of the school, insisting that yeosang transfers in order to excel for his last year of schooling. as far as you were concerned, he had decent grades, but he preferred to spend his time hanging around the skatepark after dark, when everyone else had left.

and in all the two years you'd known him, you had never once had a full conversation with him, despite being in your group of friends. his side of the 'conversation' usually consisted of monotonous 'yeahs' and 'mhms'. wooyoung constantly assured you it was because he's shy and that he'd eventually open up. but you weren't convinced. you tried so hard for him to like you, but your efforts were fruitless. it was infuriating, feeling like you were constantly doing something wrong whenever you were around him.

you currently found yourself in the backseat of yeosang's car, wedged between a drunken yunho and mingi while a chaotic wooyoung was singing along to his chosen playlist. (though, it sounded more like wailing.)

you and the eight boys had all decided to take a gap year, spend every last cent you earned on adventure and alcohol to make lifelong memories, before your careers became a blockade in your friendship. but the year was coming to an end soon, it was already mid november. on the bright side, that meant your favourite holidays were just weeks away.

yeosang was always the designated driver. that was something you had noticed about him over the last few years. to be honest, you weren't sure just how he coped with a screeching wooyoung, because you sure as hell weren't dealing very well with yunho and mingi who were playing a very intense game of rock paper scissors to decide who would be crashing on the couch in your apartment.

"i win!" mingi cheered, waving his hands excitedly. "you're on the couch, man."

yunho frowned, "damn."

you laughed, "it's okay, yunho. you can share the bed with me if you'd like."

"hey! that's not fair y/n! you said i could this time." wooyoung whined from the front seat.

"sorry, woo. you know i keep my promises, but you're going back to your apartment. remember?" you tried to reason.

wooyoung looked as though someone had switched a lightbulb on behind his eyes, "oh yeah! i forgot."

the four of you burst into laughter, mainly caused by the alcohol and partially because of wooyoung's realisation. and still, yeosang didn't crack a smile, hands just gripping the steering wheel tighter as his knuckles turned white.

soon, you arrived outside your apartment block, quickly stepping out the car after yunho. wooyoung wound his window down and you poked your head in, attempting to hug him goodbye.

"bye woo!" you said, giggling at your faltered farewell.

"good night y/n, thanks for the drinks!" he shouted, exclaiming a bit too loudly next to your ear.

"thanks for the lift as always, yeosang!" you yelled, pulling away from wooyoung's tight hug.

he nodded, "no problem." before putting the window up and driving away.

you pouted, turning around to face the two boys. "i just don't understand what i'm doing wrong." you buried your face into your hands, "why doesn't he like me?" you groaned.

"y/n." mingi began, "its nearly 1am, its way too late for this 'why does yeosang hate me?' crap." he shook your shoulders, literally trying to shake some sense into you.

"yeah, mingi's right. we've had this discussion a thousand times." yunho said grasping your wrist and pulling you up the stairs, stumbling along the way. (because lets be real, stairs are difficult enough as it is, let alone when drunk.) "now, let us into your apartment so we can eat your food and crash on your couch!" he joked, nudging mingi in a playful manner.

you reached into your pocket and fumbled around with they key for a moment before unlocking the door. the boys practically pushed you inside and made a beeline for the fridge.

"help yourselves! i'm going to shower." you called, dragging yourself to your bedroom.

once you'd finished showering you went back to the living room to check on yunho and mingi. not so much to your surprise, they had fallen asleep on your couch already, cuddled up into each other. it was cute, even picture worthy to show their sober selves. you reached for your phone which typically lived in your pocket, though you began to panic when it wasn't there. hurrying around the apartment, you searched every possible nook and cranny for your phone, but it was nowhere to be found. you collapsed onto your bed, snuggling into the soft sheets, too tired to worry about your phone anymore and content with the assumption that you'd left it in yeosang's car.

shortly, your heavy eyes fell shut and you began to sleep away the tequila.

————————

the next morning you awoke to mingi and yunho's deep, hungover voices, discussing their plans for the next week.

you reluctantly pulled yourself out of bed and dawdled down the hallway.

"ah! there's our favourite karaoke partner!" yunho greeted, jokingly.

you laughed, "shh, don't let wooyoung hear you say that."

"she's right, man. he'd be so offended." mingi said, stretching out his sore limbs. "how are you feeling today, y/n?" he asked.

"not the worst hangover i've had. what about you guys? you're welcome to stay here as long as you'd like, until you feel better." you replied, knowing them well enough to know that they'd need at least a few painkillers and a good meal before they went home.

yunho chuckled, "i feel like crap, but nothing a sandwich and glass of water can't solve."

"i second that." mingi said, raising a hand.

"okay, well in that case, i'll go to the store and get something for breakfast. sound good?" you reasoned, running a hand through your hair. you loved these boys, and making them breakfast was just a nice way of showing you cared. drunk or not, they knew how to make you smile and laugh, which they loved to see.

"sounds amazing!" yunho said, breaking into a sincere smile.

you quickly changed out of your pyjamas and slipped some shoes on.

"i might be a bit longer, i need to stop by yeosang's. i think i left my phone in his car." you explained, picking your keys up from the kitchen counter. "see you guys soon! feel free to take a shower if you want." you said, waving goodbye and heading out the door.

"okay, bye y/n!" the boys called from behind you.

the first stop was yeosang's apartment, he only lived about ten minutes away with wooyoung and san, in the same building as jongho. both yunho and mingi lived on the other side of town, which is why they so often crashed at your place after parties. seonghwa and hongjoong were fortunate enough to live in a house, just outside town, they had actually been the hosts of last night's party.

it didn't take long to get there. you pushed open the lobby door and made your way over to the elevator, disappointed to see that it was out of order for maintenance. instead, you took the stairs and began spiralling upwards. less than a minute later you looked up, only to bump into the man you came looking for.

"oh, yeosang! i'm so sorry, i didn't mean to." you quickly apologised, worried about creating another reason for him to dislike you.

"it's fine." he shrugged.

you both began to talk again at the same time, "ah, sorry, you go."

"i was just gonna say, you left your phone in my car. actually, i was about to bring it back." he pulled your phone from the pocket of his jacket, handing it to you. as he did, your fingers brushed against his. he spun around suddenly and began to walk away, "i'll see you around."

he had left before you even had a chance to thank him. slightly confused and frustrated, you turned back around and traipsed down the stairs.

you gathered what you needed for a hearty breakfast at the local convenience store before heading home and spending the rest of the day in the enjoyable company of yunho and mingi.

yeosang had entered back into his apartment and sat down on the couch.

"back already?" wooyoung asked, rummaging through the fridge.

"she was coming to get her phone and i ran into her on the staircase."

wooyoung sighed, "when are you gonna stop hating her?"

"i don't hate her." yeosang said, not looking up from his phone.

"then why do you act like you do?"

yeosang pretended to not hear that question and continued to scroll through his phone. see, he'd rather not dwell on things that he couldn't understand.

————————

to fill up your weekdays during your gap year, you had picked up a job at a hotel in town as a receptionist. to your dismay, your boss had asked you to work night shift all week, which is how you found yourself here on thursday night, sitting alert and waiting for the slight chance that someone might check in at this time of night. it was a pretty fancy hotel, and the job payed well enough, so really, you had nothing to complain about.

the nights seemed to drag on for an eternity. to keep yourself busy, you often wasted time counting the cars that drove past, or tried to count the number of crystals that hung from the chandelier. so far, only a few people had checked in during your shift, having come from overseas and recently arriving at the airport. honestly, whenever someone walked through the front door, lugging a suitcase behind them, you got excited as it gave you something to do.

the clock was creeping up to 4am and you let out a quiet yawn, feeling drowsy as your body clock hadn't yet adjusted to the change of sleeping patterns on such short notice. taking a sip of water, you shook your head, trying to stay awake. your head suddenly jolted up at the sound of the front door opening.

a man stumbled forward, and you'd seen enough zombie movies to become instantly paranoid. you quickly pushed the thought out of your head, feeling ridiculous for even considering it. but as the man got closer, you could smell the cheap, potent alcohol lingering on his body.

he leant against the desk, peering down at you. "i need a room for the night."  he grumbled. "my stupid wife kicked me out." he said under his breath.

you forced a friendly smile, despite feeling uneasy, "of course! i just need you to fill in this form with some simple details." you said, sliding across a clipboard and a pen.

he huffed, picking up the pen and scribbling onto the sheet of paper before pushing it back to you. "can i go now?"

"just a moment, sir." you replied, eyes skimming over the form as you copied the information into the computer in front of you.

the man was growing impatient, stepping from foot to foot with his arms crossed.

"uh, sir, you missed a part of the form. could you please provide your phone number here." you pointed to the empty space on the sheet.

"for fucks sake." he muttered, "i don't have my phone on me and i don't know my phone number." he said, annoyedly tapping on the desk.

"i'm really sorry, sir, but—"

"can't you just find me a fucking room?" he snapped, hands balled into fists and slamming against the desk, making you jump in fright.

before you had time to try and reason with him, he continued to shout.

"you're as stupid as my wife! i'll just find a different fucking hotel." he yelled, swiping the clipboard and pen off the desk. "useless bitch." he mumbled as he kicked over a chair on his way out.

you chewed your bottom lip, trying to fight back the tears. with shaky hands, you picked up your phone and dialled the first place that came to mind. after a few rings, the phone answered.

"woo?" you croaked, trying hard to not cry.

"he's asleep. this is yeosang." he replied, evidently having just woken up by the sound of his voice.

"oh." you began, instantly feeling guilty for waking him up, "i'm sorry i didn't mean to disturb you."

"did you need something?" he asked.

"i just, i was..." you let out a sob, wiping at a tear falling from your eye.

this didn't go unnoticed by yeosang, "are you crying? what are you doing awake right now anyway?"

"i'm at work." you managed to choke out.

"at 4am?"

"i'm on night shift."

"why are you crying then?" he asked, feeling something slightly tug at his heart, but choosing to ignore it.

you began to ramble, "a man came in and he was really drunk and complaining about his wife and then he yelled at me because i asked him to give his phone number and—"

"i'm on my way." yeosang cut you off.

"what?"

"i'll be there in ten." with that, he hung up the phone.

exactly ten minutes later, you were sat in the passenger seat of yeosang's car. he was dressed in sweats, clearly having come straight from bed. you'd left a note on the desk, explaining to your coworker why you wouldn't be there when she arrived to take over your shift. a silence filled the car, and you felt the need to talk, but chose not to, worried about giving yeosang another reason to hate you.

once you arrived outside your apartment building, you were surprised that yeosang got out the car too and trailed closely behind you up the stairs to your apartment. when you reached the door you spun around to face him.

"thank you for bringing me home." you said, voice quiet and still rather shaken up.

"it's no problem. good night, y/n." he replied, sensing that you were still upset. he suddenly felt this overwhelming urge to wrap his arms around you tightly and not let go until you stopped crying. he wanted to protect you from every drunk idiot on the planet. he wanted to make you feel safe.

but instead, he watched as you closed the door behind you and locked it from inside.

————————

you arrived at work the next morning, instantly feeling more comfortable with cleaners, employees and people coming and going. immediately, you headed for your boss's office.

"good morning, sir. i just wanted to come and apologise for leaving my shift early last night. i can assure you it won't happen again." you said, feeling nervous as to what your boss might say.

he shook his head, "i should be the one apologising, a man came in this morning and spoke very sternly about the safety problems here. i realise now how stupid it was of me to make you work night shift, alone, at such a young age. we've hired security guards and have also made sure that two people will be on desk at all times. i'm sorry that you had to deal with that."

you were at a loss for words, you didn't think that there would be such drastic changes just from the once incident. "thank you so much." you replied.

"for now, take the rest of the day off. you'll only be working day shifts for next week and can return to doing night shifts whenever you feel ready to do so." your boss said, motioning for the door.

the rest of the day you spent in deep sleep, catching up on some much overdue rest.

———————

weeks passed and you found that work was much more enjoyable. you still hadn't returned to working night shifts, but at least now you had someone to run the front desk with you and keep you company.

this weekend, you were going to visit hongjoong and seonghwa. hongjoong was sick and so you decided to go help out since seonghwa couldn't always be there to look after him.

you knocked on their front door and was surprised to be greeted by san.

"good afternoon! come in." he gave you a hug before ushering you inside.

"what are you doing here?" you said, following him down the hall.

in the living room, you saw all eight of the boys gathered around a couch-ridden hongjoong.

"jongho was already here when me, yeosang and woo arrived." san explained.

"yeah, and then mingi and yunho turned up." wooyoung continued.

"y/n! i have never been more glad to see you! you gotta save me from them." hongjoong laughed, arms open, signalling for a hug.

you went over and embraced him in a hug, "good thing i brought an excessive amount of cookies." you said, placing the box of cookies on the coffee table next to the couch. the table was covered in empty mugs and bowls, you could tell seonghwa had been busy and hadn't had the chance to clean up. you opened up the box and handed him a cookie before offering them around to the rest of the boys.

"you're the best cook ever." mingi said, taking a big bite.

"i made you spaghetti last night!" yunho countered, feeling offended that his roommate didn't think he was the better cook. mingi just laughed and took another bite.

"jongho get off the counter, please." seonghwa said, coming through the front door. "don't be so comfortable, you were throwing up in my toilet like a month ago." he joked.

yeosang glanced your way, his eyebrows furrowed like he was contemplating something.

"lets head off and give these two some space." yunho said, dragging mingi behind him.

wooyoung stood up, "yeah, lets get going."

yeosang pulled his keys from his pocket, "okay, bye guys." he said, heading down the hallway.

"can we get some food on the way home?" you heard san call as they left.

"bye hongjoong! i hope you're feeling better soon." jongho said, "bye seonghwa, i promise i won't throw up in your toilet any time soon." he joked, leaving through the front door.

"seonghwa, how are you? don't forget to take some time for yourself as well." you frowned.

"i'm tired, but i'll be okay. i just gotta clean up and—"

"why don't you go rest a while? i can keep hongjoong company for a few hours." you reasoned, wanting to help as much as possible. there was nothing you hated more than seeing you friends in distress and upset.

he looked between hongjoong and yourself, "i couldn't."

hongjoong let out an audible huff, "hwa! will you just let her help please, she clearly wants to."

you grinned, "exactly, now go read or sleep or watch some tv or something." you said, gently pushing him towards their shared bedroom.

you spent the afternoon tidying up and talking with hongjoong. you managed to do all the dishes and put them away before scouring their kitchen, deciding on what you could use for dinner. you found everything you needed for a decent meal and began cooking it up. hongjoong had dozed off mid conversation, surrounded in a pile of tissues, you chose to let him sleep so he would recover quicker.

about an hour later, you placed two steamy hot meals onto their dining table next to two full glasses of water. you quietly knocked on their bedroom door, finding seonghwa asleep amongst the covers.

you gently shook him awake, "hwa, i made dinner for you guys. you can wake joong up, i'll head off now." you said with a smile.

leaving the two of them to enjoy their dinner, you headed home and cooked yourself something to eat. it was nice having some time to yourself, but saturday nights were becoming more and more empty as winter grew closer. december was only days away and the year would soon come to an end. you reached for the phone, suddenly desperately missing your friends despite only seeing them hours ago.

"hey woo, are you free next weekend?" you asked.

he paused a moment, "i think so, why?"

"you wanna go out with the others? it's been a while since we have all caught up for drinks."

"count me in!" wooyoung cheered.

you called everyone else up and they all agreed, even hongjoong promised to come if he was feeling better.

————————

you found yourself surrounded by wooyoung, san, yunho and mingi as the music blared. it was a less popular club on the far side of town but it was a comfortable place for you all. you often came here for drinks and the staff members knew you, quite well, a little too well. san grabbed your hand and spun you around a few times with the music.

you laughed, leaning against him, "maybe spinning around isn't the best idea right after two shots of vodka."

"what?" san yelled into your ear, struggling to hear you over the music.

you laughed louder, pulling him closer to you, "i said, spinning is not a good idea after drinking vodka!"

"oh!" he joined you in laughing before trying to twirl you around once more.

hongjoong and seonghwa sat at the bar, holding hands and being intimate as always. yeosang was sat next to jongho at a booth, quietly talking with him, but from the corner of your eye, you saw jongho stand up and walk away. your eyes watched him worriedly and you couldn't help but run after him. you followed him as best you could, stumbling every now and then. he'd gone to the bathroom so you patiently waited outside until he came back, looking slightly pale.

you practically leapt at him, doing a quick scan to make sure he was okay, "jongho? are you alright?"

he smiled at your overwhelming concern, "yeah, i just drank too much as usual. i'll be alright, you can go back to dancing."

"let me just get you some water first. i'll be right back okay?" you patted his shoulder. "don't go anywhere i'll be back in a second."

you made your way back to where jongho had been sitting with yeosang. as you approached, yeosang eyed you up and down, taking in your drunken state, though, it wasn't the first time he'd seen you this way. you nearly tripped as you reached the table, struggling to walk in heels.

"i need a glass of water, do you have a glass of water? jongho needs a glass of water." you mumbled to yourself, reaching for the jug in the center of the table.

"are you okay?" yeosang asked, quickly pushing your hand away from the jug.

"i'm okay, but jongho needs water. can i take this cup? he's waiting for me, i told him not to go anywhere, i need to get back to jongho—" you tried to pick up a glass but yeosang pressed your hand back down once more.

"i'll take it to him, you stay here." he said, filling the cup full with water and heading towards the bathrooms.

your brain suddenly felt fuzzy and your eyes became blurry, it was like the alcohol hit your system all at once. your head spun round and round and you leaned forward, resting your hands on your head. you'd never felt this sick from drinking, maybe you'd had too much too quickly, maybe it was the spinning. there was no way to tell, all you knew was that you felt like you were about to fall from the top of a very high roller coaster.

your eyes felt increasingly heavy, you allowed them to slip shut, head falling to the table with a not so gentle thud.

"y/n?" someone shook you, "y/n wake up!" it was wooyoung.

"shit, is she okay? should we call an ambulance?" jongho said, reaching for his phone.

"is she breathing? has anyone checked?" seonghwa gently lifted your shoulders and sat you upright, relieved to see the rise and fall of your chest. "we should call a taxi and get her home."

"are you crazy? she's unconscious, she won't be able to get up the stairs to her apartment! what if the driver is dodgy? she's already had to deal with shitty men while working night shift, imagine if something happened while she's drunk!" yeosang blurted out. the boys were shocked over his sudden concern for you. yeosang had never once shown any interest or care for you in the presence of them.

"well, what should we do then?" mingi asked, worriedly running a hand through his hair.

"i'll take her, you've all been drinking." yeosang concluded. "she'll be fine, don't worry. enjoy the rest of your night, okay? i've dealt with woo passing out before remember?"

"that's true." san said, throwing a light hearted glare in wooyoung's direction, who showed a rather sheepish expression.

the boys went back to their drinks, taking it a little slower now and yeosang carried you to his car. it wasn't easy, but he managed to sit you upright in the back seat of his car with his rear view mirror aimed directly at you so he could make sure you were okay.

he was able to lift you up the stairs and get your house key from the pocket of your jacket, which would've looked questionable to anyone else, but he had the best intentions. he sat you down in a dining chair, watching as your head lolled forward and your body slumped. he quickly filled a glass of water and came back to you.

"y/n." he whispered, resting a hand on your shoulder. "y/n." he said again, louder this time.

the last thing he wanted to do was hurt you, but you weren't waking up and that was becoming concerning. he shook your shoulder, as gently as he possible could in a moment like this, and to his relief, your eyes hesitantly opened.

your head felt like a bowling ball and you groaned quietly. "yeosang?"

"here." he said holding the cup to your lips, allowing you to take a small sip.

"how did we get here?" you mumbled, head rolling to the side.

he caught your head and carefully pushed you back upright, "i drove you, this is your apartment."

"oh." you said, eyes drooping shut again. "oh." you repeated.

"y/n, i really need you to stay awake right now." he said, bringing the cup to your mouth again. "lets talk."

"we never talk!" you exclaimed. "this is the longest conversation we've ever had!"

"i know." he said, pulling up a chair to sit directly in front of you. yeosang felt that slight tug at his heart again tonight, the way you sounded so excited just to talk with him.

"no, no, no." you whined, "this is so bad!"

"what is it?"

you pouted before nervously biting your lip, "i'm really sorry."

"for what?" he questioned, leaning back in his chair.

"for ruining your night and making you stay here with me! now you just have another reason to hate me." you sighed, letting your head fall into your hands.

"i could never hate you." he said, voice barely above a whisper.

but you had fallen back asleep, so yeosang sat you upright once more and monitored you closely all night. with every minute that passed, he wished more and more that it was easier for him to show his emotions, to you especially. he wondered if maybe he wasn't so closed off that things would be different between the two of you. but it was hard for him, to let people in, he was afraid. afraid of people judging the real him, afraid of what might happen if he lets himself become vulnerable, afraid of facing his feelings about you.

you awoke hours later with a raging headache and extreme nausea. you headed straight for the bathroom and hunched over the toilet, feeling the sickest you'd ever felt. yeosang waited patiently outside the bathroom door with a glass of water and painkillers.

when you came out, he held his hand out, "take this."

you looked down at his hand and then up at him, slightly confused, "what are you doing here?"

"you passed out last night, and i drove you home because everyone else had been drinking." he said, passing the glass of water.

"oh my god." you ran a hand through your hair, "yeosang, i'm so sorry. i didn't mean to be any trouble! you must of been here all night, i promise it won't happen again, that was so stupid of me—"

"it's fine, don't worry about it." he said, shrugging, "i'll get going now, but make sure you take it easy and drink enough water." his eyes carefully scanned your body one last time, making sure you were really okay. he headed for the door and you followed.

"i'm really sorry." you frowned, feeling as though no amount of apologies would make it up to him.

he let out a slight chuckle, "it's okay, seriously y/n." he said before leaving. you heard the all too familiar jingle of his keys as the door closed behind him.

he'd stayed with you all night, eyes watching over you closely. ready at your side whenever you stirred in your sleep. he'd been there in the morning prepared with water and painkillers. this was never how it was, usually this was your job, taking care of the boys. it was your way of showing you cared, helping out wherever possible.

this wasn't like yeosang. at all.

————————

as soon as yeosang got home he was greeted by a very concerned san and wooyoung.

"is she okay?"

"are you tired?"

"did she wake up?"

he was bombarded by questions.

"she's okay, she fell asleep after a while and i made her take some painkillers when she woke up." yeosang said, collapsing onto the couch.

"so you really don't hate her then." wooyoung thought aloud.

"he can't, he spent the whole night looking after her!" san said, hitting wooyoung like it was obvious.

"owww," wooyoung rubbed his arm, "even she thinks you don't like her!"

"i know, she said last night. but she probably won't remember saying that." yeosang said, feeling increasingly drowsy from his lack of sleep.

"maybe you guys should like, talk things out?" san suggested, taking a seat next to him.

"maybe." yeosang said, drifting off into sleep.

you had spent the day curled up in bed, wondering how you could make it up to yeosang, and there was nothing more you wanted than to get to know him better, but what would he want? you called up san on that thought.

"hey sannie," you said, "i need your help, actually, is woo there as well?"

"oh my god she's alive!" you heard wooyoung call from beside san.

"what do you need help with?" san asked.

you paused a moment, "is yeosang there?"

"well yes, but he's asleep."

you groaned, "i feel so bad that he stayed up all night looking after me. i really wanna make it up to him but i don't know how. plus, it's not like he's that fond of me. maybe i should just thank him by staying out of his space."

"i don't think he'd like that." wooyoung interjected. "i still think he just needs time before opening up to you."

"i think its just me." you sighed, worriedly chewing on your bottom lip.

"hey! don't be like that! there's no reason to not like you." san scolded you for down talking yourself as he always does.

"agreed." wooyoung said, chiming in.

"i'm sure i'll work something out. thanks guys! enjoy the rest of your day!" you said.

"good luck!"

"bye y/n!"

————————

you had been staring at your phone for at least an hour, typing and retyping the message to yeosang. wooyoung gave you his number so that you could contact him when you'd finally worked out how to make it up to him. in the end, you decided that you would let him decide.

you drew in a sharp breath and squeezed your eyes tightly shut as you pressed send.

you: hey yeosang, i still feel really bad about the other day, i wanna know how i can make it up to you !!

yeosang: did wooyoung give you my number? T~T

you: yes he did.. i hope thats okay !

yeosang: of course yeosang: how about you make it up to me over a cup of coffee? >.<

you: that sounds great !! you: when are you free ?

yeosang: does tomorrow morning work for you ? i can pick you up ^_^

you: of course ! i'll see you tomorrow :)

yeosang sat in his room, facepalming. why was it so easy to be more open over text?

you on the other hand, felt your heart swell in a bizarre way. maybe it was the way you hadn't expected him to use such cute little emoticons. maybe it was the way that you'd be able to have a full conversation with him. whatever it was, excitement had taken over you.

————————

a knock pounded at your door and you rushed to open it.

"ready to go?" he asked, leaning against the door frame coolly.

"yes, lets go!" you said, sounding a little too excited.

the two of you made your way down the stairs and into yeosang's car. you found yourself smiling as you looked out the window.

your excitement hadn't gone unnoticed, "you seem awfully excited."

"i really wanted to make it up to you," you beamed. "it must've been boring to watch over me all night."

"i didn't mind so much." he said, shrugging.

you frowned, "you shouldn't of done it."

"and leave you passed out in the club?" he quirked an eyebrow up at you.

"well..."

"exactly." he said, parking the car outside a small cafe nearby his apartment. "come on, lets go inside."

you followed him in and took a seat across from him at a table close to the window. you both ordered coffees and resumed conversation.

"so, where were we?" you smiled, taking a sip of coffee.

"talking about how you wanted me to leave you passed out in the club." he said. you were almost convinced you saw a teasing smile pulling at his lips.

"right. i'm so sorry about that."

this time he actually chuckled, and you were taken aback. it was like the wall yeosang had surrounding himself was crumbling before your eyes.

"you need to apologise less." he laughed, bringing his coffee cup to his mouth for a sip. "half of the time we talk its just you saying sorry to me."

"i'm so—"

"hey!" the two of you broke into laughter.

his laugh was loud but warm and you couldn't help but notice the way his nose scrunched up cutely, the way his eyes looked full of stars and the way he brushed his hair out of his eyes after, revealing his beautiful birthmark. from that point on, you wanted to be the one to make him laugh every day.

he felt that familiar tug at his heart, the one he'd been feeling every moment he spent alone with you. the one he felt when he first met you. the one he couldn't make any sense of. it was as though his heart was a violin and you were the one playing it. (which would explain the tugging feeling.) but you were playing the sweetest song and he never wanted it to end.

the two of you laughed the morning away, gradually making up for what you'd missed over two years in a matter of two hours.

you'd discovered that even after getting him to open up more, he wasn't one for words. you found yourself talking his ear off while he listened intently, occasionally sharing his opinions and stories. in all his honesty, he didn't mind listening to you talk. he could've sat there all day, drinking countless cups of coffee, watching the way you bit your bottom lip whenever you paused to think or the way your eyes filled with sparkles when you talked about something that made you happy.

you insisted on paying for the infinite cups of coffee, as it was your way of making it up to him. he reluctantly agreed, but promised that he would pay if there ever was a next time, which he secretly hoped there would be. he'd finally had the chance to let his walls down. (it was actually more like you'd climbed the walls and torn them down with your bare hands.) but he was thankful for it.

he drove you back to your apartment, even after you persisted on walking home, seeing as it wasn't that far. he refused, insisting that he drive you. he even followed you up the stairs to the door of your apartment.

you turned around to face him, "you know, you're not so bad when you actually wanna talk to me."

"you know, you're not so bad when you're not drunk." he countered, his lips breaking into a playful grin.

you glared jokingly, "hey! don't make me apologise again."

"okay, okay. i won't." he said, raising his hands in defence.

you smiled, resting against the door, "alright, well, i've really enjoyed hanging out with you today. maybe we should catch up more often."

"maybe we should." he said, bearing a coy smile, "bye, y/n. i'll see you around."

————————

it was only about a week later he showed up at your work, at the end of your shift. you were pleasantly surprised to see him, and at first thought he was just someone coming to book a room.

"hello, are you looking for a r— yeosang?"

"when do you get off work?" he asked, glancing over to the clock.

"five minutes."

"i'll be waiting in the car, okay?" he said, turning on his heel and heading for the door.

on his way out, you saw as he ran into your boss, the two of them beginning conversation.

"it's good to see you've made those security changes." yeosang said as he nodded, extending his arm for a friendly handshake. "i'm very thankful."

your boss shook his hand, "and i'm thankful that you suggested them."

just over five minutes later you got into the passenger seat of yeosang's car.

"it was you who told my boss about the safety problems." you said, in near disbelief.

"hello, to you too." he joked sarcastically. "well, i would hate to think that the situation could happen again, so i just suggested some possible improvements. thats all." he shrugged like it was nothing.

"suddenly, i feel the need to make it up to you again." you smiled shyly.

"you can do that by accompanying me to the skate park." he said, motioning to his skateboard on the back seat.

"ah, so thats why you came."

"well yeah, i wanted to bring you to the skate park."

your heart swelled once again, feeling joyed that he wanted to share one of his favourite places with you. (despite him never telling you directly, you knew he loved the skate park as he spent majority of his high school time there when he wasn't studying.)

when you arrived, the sun was beginning to slip behind the horizon, causing the sky to glow a rosy pink. there were still a few kids, probably high schoolers, hanging around the park. you took a seat at a bench and waited for yeosang to come over, who was getting his skateboard out the car. you felt oddly out of place since you were still in your neat work uniform and didn't know the first thing about skateboarding.

yeosang rolled over with a grin plastered onto his face, you'd never seen him so happy, and it made you happy to see him this way. it was strange how all it took was a few cups of coffee for him to become a completely different person around you.

he didn't need to ask you to watch as your eyes were already glued to him as he dropped into the bowl, showing countless tricks and flips.

the truth was in fact that yeosang was grateful for you 'making it up to him'. he'd never been able to comprehend his feelings for you, if they were even feelings at all. he hated the confusion and decided it was easier to ignore it, and to an extent, ignore you, to make it go away. it had been working for the most part, until every time the two of you were alone together, he couldn't ignore the slight tug at his heart, that was becoming more of a pull over the last few weeks.

"you're amazing!" you cheered as he sat down next to you, out of breath.

"thanks." he smiled shyly, running a hand through his hair and out of his face. he leaned back, looking up at the sky. "do you sometimes wish you could see the stars from within the city? hongjoong and seonghwa are so lucky they can see them from their house."

you pondered a moment, thinking about the last time you actually saw stars in the sky. "i see stars in your eyes sometimes." you said, absent minded.

he felt warmth burning in his cheeks, "you do?"

"do what?" you turned to him, "did i say that out loud?" you gasped, covering your face in embarrassment. "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to say that it was just a thought and—"

"what did i say about apologising?" he laughed. "it's getting cold, right? you ready to head home?" he asked.

you smiled, "if you are."

he drove you home and said goodbye, feeling happy about spending time alone with you once again. he couldn't stop thinking about what you said and you couldn't stop feeling like a fool for saying it.

————————

the weather got colder and colder and soon it began to snow as the days of december passed. you had spent the day helping jongho move some new furniture into his apartment. it was a difficult job, but easier with the two of you, even san and wooyoung came to help. you couldn't resist wondering where yeosang was and why he didn't come, seeing as they lived in the same building. maybe he was busy, you thought.

"hey, where's yeosang?" you asked, lifting a box and placing it on the kitchen counter.

"at home, i think he's been feeling sick or something, he hardly comes out of his room lately." wooyoung shrugged, assuming it was all good.

"if he's sick i'll bring him over some food and painkillers, maybe keep him some company." you explained, not wanting yeosang to be unwell.

"i think he'd rather be left alone, to be honest." san said, giving wooyoung a side glance that you couldn't miss.

you pulled out your phone and sent yeosang a quick message.

you: are you feeling okay? san and woo said you were sick :((

he didn't respond right away and you just figured he was asleep. but as you finished helping out at jongho's house a few hours later, he still hadn't responded. when you were sitting down to eat dinner at home, he still hadn't respond. just before you were going to turn the lights out and go to bed, he still hadn't responded.

something was up. this wasn't like yeosang, not anymore. not since the two of you had been spending so much time together. maybe it was like the boys said, and he was truly very sick, but in that case, why wouldn't they let you help?

————————

days passed and you went to work as usual, repeating the same few lines, asking people if they want a room, asking them to fill in a form, then directing them to the right room. days passed and you still hadn't heard back from yeosang, you wondered if he was still sick. days passed and you began to think maybe you should go over there to see if he's okay.

but if there was one thing you'd learnt about yeosang recently, it was that he was the quieter type, and probably wouldn't appreciate you going over there to keep him company and would rather be alone. so that evening when you got off work, you didn't go visit him like you so desperately wanted to, instead, you went straight home.

you cooked and ate dinner for yourself, before picking up your phone, only to see still no messages from yeosang.

you: hey woo you: is yeosang feeling better ?

wooyoung: yeah he is

you: well then can i come visit tomorrow ?

wooyoung: i think he's busy wooyoung: sorry

you: its okay woo you: its not your fault !!

you switched your phone off and headed for the shower, trying to wash away the stress and worry for yeosang that had built up over the last few weeks. you had really grown to like him and there was still so much about him you wanted to learn, like when he learned to skateboard or how he got the small scar on the back of his hand, that you'd noticed when ever he brushes his hair out of his eyes.

two years he'd spent, not interested in holding conversation with you and two years you'd spent, wondering what you'd did so wrong. but lately, you felt like you were doing something right around him, getting him to smile and laugh, share his own stories.

you couldn't shake the feeling that maybe he still didn't like you, and had just been trying for wooyoung's sake.

or maybe he was genuinely starting to like you, but you went and fucked it up by weirding him out and telling him about his starry eyes.

or maybe he'd just had enough of you already. decided that a few weeks was enough time spent trying to change things between the two of you.

as you finished showering and changed into comfortable clothes, you glanced at the clock which read 10:56pm. you switched on the television to watch some youtube before going to bed. as you felt yourself dozing off, a faint knock sounded at your door, so quiet you almost missed it.

when you opened the door, you were shocked to see yeosang standing there, leaning against the door frame for support. he looked up at you, his normally starry eyes were dulled with tears.

you rushed forward to him, smelling the alcohol as you got closer, "yeosang are you okay? what are you doing here? i thought you were sick. are you drunk? you never drink, come inside." you gently pulled him inside, closing the door behind you. when you turned to face him, he was staring at you, tears about to spill over the brim of his eyes.

"i hate you." he breathed out, voice barely louder than a whisper. he didn't seem angry though, he looked fragile, like a glass vase balancing on the edge of a table.

you felt the urge to cry, finally hearing those three words that confirmed your biggest concern, yeosang disliking you. "yeosang, i'm so sorry. i never meant to—"

"i hate you." he said, louder this time before running a hand through his hair hastily. he let out a frustrated groan, dragging his hands down his face. "i hate the tugging feeling in my heart whenever we're alone. i hate the way you put yourself before others. i hate the way you ramble on when you're nervous. i hate the way your eyes sparkle when you laugh. i hate the way i don't drink around you because i feel the need to protect you and make sure you're safe. i hate the way i tried to ignore you for two years because i was scared and confused about my own feelings. i hate how it only took one cup of coffee with you for my walls to come crashing down!" he paced from side to side, waving his hands around crazily.

yeosang looked scared and lost, like he'd never felt this way about anyone before, and that was the truth. he didn't know how to comprehend these feelings and it terrified him.

you watched as he spiralled, seeming as though it would never stop. you weren't sure what to do, so you just listened to that swelling feeling in your heart once again, the one that had led you to develop feelings for yeosang, and you pulled him close into your arms. he clung onto you tightly, scared to let go, like if he did then he'd lose you forever. you ran your fingers through his hair briefly, trying your best to comfort him.

"i'm sorry." you repeatedly whispered to him. you'd never meant to upset him or confuse him.

yeosang let out a quiet sob into your chest, "i hate the way i've fallen in love with you." he croaked out.

he didn't hate you. never did. never will. your heart swelled completely in your chest, feeling as though it would burst through. but it couldn't be true. he's totally drunk out of his mind.

"you're not in your right mind, yeosang, you need to get home. you're drunk and talking nonsense." you embraced him tightly one more time, and you could've sworn you felt the beat of his heart through the hug. "come on," you urged, steering him towards the door, "wooyoung and san are probably worried and waiting up for you."

with much effort, you led him down the stairs of your apartment block and walked him home. the street lamps led you in the freezing city night air. you held his wrist lightly, guiding him up the stairs to his own apartment. he didn't speak a single word the whole time, instead, sniffling and wiping at his eyes. it hurt you so much to see him this broken, but you knew he wasn't saying the truth under control of the alcohol in his veins.

you knocked at his apartment door, hoping that one of the boys were still awake. luckily, they both were and quickly they flung the door open.

"y/n? yeosang?" san questioned, his eyes wide open with disbelief.

"we've been so worried about you!" wooyoung said, pulling yeosang away from you. "hang on, are you drunk?"

san had noticed his tired, tear stained eyes, "you look like you've been crying! are you okay?"

you let out a quiet sigh, knowing you didn't need to be here anymore. you gave a small wave goodbye and headed home, utterly exhausted.

and though you were so drained, you couldn't seem to fall asleep. those words yeosang said to you kept running through your mind busily.

did he mean any of it?

————————

yeosang felt bad. he felt terrible. like he wanted to vanish into thin air and float away with the breeze. though he couldn't, no, he desperately wanted to apologise to you. but he didn't know how, he wasn't good with words or expressing his feelings, and you wished he knew that was something you loved about him.

wooyoung and san tried to ask him what happened the night he drunkenly confessed to you, but he couldn't have them know that he'd been harbouring feelings for you for all this time, they'd never let him live it down. he could imagine the continuous teasing they'd give him, nudging him whenever you were together or giving him side glances after talking to you.

yeosang gave it lots of thought. he mulled it over in his head repeatedly. it was only after hours spent hidden away in his room that he decided to go back to where it all started, a text. a text that said how much he wanted to make it up to you for having to deal with him drunk, just like the one you'd sent initially.

yeosang: hey y/n, i feel really bad about the other day, i wanna know how i can make it up to you! T^T

your heart leapt a mile seeing his name appear on your phone. you grinned upon reading his message, realising it was scarily similar to the message you had first sent him.

you: hmmm you: that sounds familiar

yeosang: >.< yeosang: seriously though, how does dinner at my place tomorrow night sound? i'll cook

you: you can cook?

yeosang: there's a lot you don't know about me x_x

you: okay, i'll be there !!

————————

yeosang wasn't lying when he said he can cook. as you traipsed up the stairs of his apartment block you could smell something delicious laced in the air.

the usual swelling in your heart had instead fell to the pit of your stomach, you were feeling slightly nervous as to what would happen when you entered yeosang's apartment. you inhaled deeply before knocking at the door of his apartment.

"hey y/n, come in." yeosang greeted, holding an arm out, signalling for you to come inside.

"you must've been working hard cooking! it smells delicious." you said, feeling a sense of comfort just from the smell of food.

"yeah, lucky i sent wooyoung and san over to jongho's place, otherwise i doubt there would be any pasta to serve." he joked. "you can take a seat, i've just gotta serve up."

you sat down in front of a neatly laid table, it had somewhat surprised you how much effort yeosang had put into this dinner tonight. he placed a steamy hot plate of pasta in front of you and one where he would sit.

"so." he began.

"so." you copied, teasingly.

"i guess, i really just wanted to say i'm sorry for how i behaved the other night when i was drunk. you shouldn't of had to deal with that." he frowned, poking at his dinner.

you furrowed your brows, "it's seriously fine yeosang." you took a bite of pasta, "i was just surprised to see you drunk, since you never drink."

he chuckled, bringing a hand up to cover his mouth, "actually, i do. i just never drink when you're there."

"really? why?" you questioned, eating another mouthful of pasta.

"because..." he paused. "no, it sounds dumb out loud."

"it's okay, you don't have to explain yourself." you smiled warmly, "but that does remind me to ask... do you remember anything you said to me while you were drunk?" you leant forward, genuinely curious.

he sighed, "i remember.. enough."

"you don't really hate me, right?" you asked, playing with the food on your plate.

"of course not! that's why i invited you here tonight. to show you that i don't, and to make it up to you." he had to refrain from reaching across to hold your hand, just to show how much he cared that little bit more.

you nodded, "well, thats good. i was kinda worried that we'd gone back to square one."

comfort settled within you. it was relieving to know you weren't hated by the one person whose love you wanted most. a tiny thought crept into your mind, maybe, just maybe, now would be the right time to tell him about your blossoming feelings for him. or would that confuse him more? now you were the one feeling conflicted.

"are you finished eating?" he asked, reaching for your empty plate.

"yes, thank you! it was delicious. you're a good cook, y'know."

"ah, thanks y/n." he turned away to hide the blush appearing on his cheeks.

"would you like me to do the dishes? since you cooked." you offered, standing up. but he quickly opposed.

"don't be ridiculous." he shooed you back to your seat. "can i get you a coffee? water? wine?"

"a coffee sounds good, i think you and i have had too many drunken situations lately." you laughed.

yeosang pulled out two mugs and put the kettle on. he felt your eyes carefully watching him. once again, he hated the feeling that was pulling at his heart. the way you could say nothing, yet he felt everything.

"can i tell you something?" you asked, voice now quieter and more hesitant.

"sure, what is it?" he said, placing a warm cup of coffee in front of you.

you took a sip, humming in delight. it was exactly the way you liked it. when the two of you went out for coffee, he had unintentionally remembered just the way you like it.

"well," you began cautiously, in case you brought this situation into flames again. "i just... i always wondered why you didn't like me. if i was doing something wrong, if i said something once that really upset you. and then after we started spending time together, i finally felt like i was doing the right thing." you groaned, frustrated with yourself for not getting to the point quicker. "what i'm trying to say is that i have feelings for you. it's okay if you don't feel the same way. i wouldn't expect you to, i just thought you should know—"

yeosang basically choked on his coffee, eyes widening in shock. "it's okay, y/n! in case you hadn't noticed, i'm crazy about you."

you had continued to ramble nervously before hearing what he said.

"wait. you are?"

"basically ever since you said that thing about stars in my eyes, yes."

you cringed, remembering how you had said that so absent minded. "yeah, sorry about that."

"it's okay, it was cute. and what did i say about apologising?"

you shook your head and smiled, "i know."

————————

ever since the two of you confessed to each other, you had been almost inseparable, except of course when you had work. but he dropped you home most nights, even though you insisted it was okay and that you could walk. he came over every weekend just to spend time with you, even if the two of you just sat and talked, enjoying each other's company. you'd been dating for a few weeks now, but kept it undercover, not wanting to suffer the incessant questioning that would come if you told your friends.

it didn't go unnoticed either, wooyoung and san were constantly nagging yeosang about why the two of you spent so much time together, and each time he just shrugged it off.

christmas was just around the corner, so you were spending the evening at seonghwa's and hongjoong's house, who of course, were throwing an unnecessarily large house party to celebrate.

you were sat between a very drunk yunho and mingi, who were trying to talk to an also very drunk jongho. you eyed your boyfriend from across the room, as if asking for a way out and he just laughed at the situation you were stuck in.

after at least ten minutes more of having your ear talked off, yeosang came to pull you away to the dance floor.

"care to dance?" he asked, extending his hand to you.

you immediately jumped up, latching onto his hand, "i would love to!"

he chuckled, pulling you close to his side and leading you to the makeshift dance floor that seonghwa and hongjoong created.

the two of you laughed at the boys' reaction. they were completely shocked to see the two of you so close together and yeosang being friendly.

he twirled you around a few times with the music, before settling his arms around your waist. he brought you near to him as you placed your arms behind his neck. you swayed back and forth, engulfed in your own little bubble of comfort in each other's arms, completely out of time with the loud thumping music that blared around you.

you felt content, and yeosang no longer felt confused. he found his home in your arms and his happiness.

you reached up to place your lips on his, capturing the moment surrounding you. yeosang melted into the kiss, discovering that your lips were soft and sweet against his, just as he had imagined, which caused his knees to feel weak and his heart to skip more than just one beat. he never wanted to let you go, he wanted to compensate for every second that he didn't spend with you since the two of you met.

he leaned forward and whispered softly, just so you could hear above all the music and singing, "lets stay like this forever."

[nari-nim]

yeosang as your boyfriend

nari note: kicking off the bf series with this king. who do you want to see next? creds for gif goes to @holy-yeosang​

Let’s be honest, you might have to make the first move with him

But it’s worth it because yeosang is actually such boyfriend material

He takes comfort in established familiarity and warm-heartedness, so likes taking things slow and understanding your personality more than anything

Shy boi at first even as y’all are dating

It can take a long time to reach the point he’s super comfortable. 

But please be patient with him because he really has super intense and strong feelings for you

Super playful and chaotic once he feels max comfortable around you!!

Type to be quiet around others but then rambles nonstop with you. Would be so funny too, he has so many hot takes he was holding in 

Can be unpredictable, but not in a bad way! 

More like he just stares at you in such a straight face until you get slightly worried, but he just feeds you three pocky sticks, kisses your lips as you are munching in confusion, and then leaves

Also please he’s so funny??? Like it’s not the type of humor like Wooyoung who just is so loud and makes everyone laugh, but the type where he makes such snarky or intellectual jabs at the situation/those around him

So it just ends up with the two of your snickering on the side

So many inside jokes

So much laughter, always 

Definitely the type to tease you as his form of flirting

Enjoys personal attention and lots of eye contact when talking about literally anything that comes to mind

Really likes just sitting with you somewhere cozy and talking about life for hours and hours on end

Once he’s comfortable, he’s actually so adorably expressive and unafraid to return PDA

While he may struggle with emotional expression at times, physical affection can stand in loving words for him

While not as touchy as San or Wooyoung, he isn’t afraid to have the two of you be in your own world

Sits close to you at any given opportunity and quietly takes care of you

Like offering you snacks first, moves your hair behind your ears, urges you to wrap you arms around his, gives you his jacket

He’s the type to love you quietly

Actions speak louder than words, and his actions are so incredibly thoughtful and attentive

For example, he may not be tripping over himself to tell you just how much he loves you 24/7 but he never fails to open soft drinks for you after the one time your nail broke in front of him when you tried to pry the metal tab open, he literally ignores the group chat but makes sure he bids you good morning and good night because he’s seen how happy they make you feel, etc

Ok but he is so kind even if he rarely voices it. You can absolutely count on him to be there for emotional and practical support whenever it’s needed.

Very trusting in the relationship

He is really understanding of you having friends/a life outside of him so he’s less likely to get jealous

Really rational in disagreements

Sometimes it can get hard to read his expressions, so it’s important you both learn to communicate a lot to keep the relationship healthy! He’s actually really good at voicing his thoughts and opinions well once he has the space to do so

Values reciprocation

Will do aegyo to make you blush or sway things in his favor. And then will proceed to hide his face immediately after

please he is Adorable

You’re his hype man. He will also then get super shy, but loves every single second of it. Secretly wants you to hype him up nonstop

I think he secretly really enjoys words of affirmation as his primary love language (receiving).

Compliments can be a little rare from him, so when he does compliment you, you know he really means it!! 

And he will roast you

Sometimes, he has his fun by occasionally starting some verbal sparring followed by intense making up. 

Like he’ll choose a topic and say something so wild about it just to see your expression. Pushes your buttons a little before either one of you has to shut the other up through a make out session or a bet

Just very trustworthy, loyal, loving and faithful as a whole uwu

NSFW after this

With that being said, he’s a switch

I don’t see power play being as big of deal for him tbh, he likes to go with the flow with what you both feel like during the moment

literally his preference to dom or sub may actually depend on you and the dynamic of the relationship

when he’s dom, he’s soft or hard depending on the mood as well

but ngl I’m leaning on that hard dom agenda

Sex with him can start out a bit vanilla at first

He’s so careful and wants you to be comfy :’)

But give it a few rounds and lots of communication, his kinky ass will take over

Takes a lot of joy in pleasing you, and can take this to an extreme where he just wants to watch you cum again and again and again from his touch

Um can be a bit of a sadist 

Type to ask you if it hurts while overstimulating you and says “good” when you moan in affirmation 

Secretly has a thing to see you cry 

Also really likes edging

He likes driving you so desperate to the point you’re begging him to let you cum

As you’re reaching and moaning for him he’ll say in a teasing tone “oh really, what do you want? You want my cock? Hm? Is that it?” 

Just to hear your pleady whines

That mocking tone will send shivers down anyone’s spine 

Oh My God you cannot tell me he won’t have a degradation kink (giving)

Also the type to be like “use your words” while he’s going down on you and then proceed to suck your clit extra hard, making you unable to form coherent sounds through your loud moans. It then becomes his excuse to edge you for yet another round because you didn’t use your words, did you?

Whew, anyways

Grab onto his biceps while he rails into you and notice how they flex underneath you as he starts pounding harder in response

Likes to show off his gains by pushing you up against a wall 

Also likes it when you top him

Likes hearing you really vocal, even though he’s more on the quieter side when he isn’t dirty talking

Usually just groans when hitting an extra sensitive spot or when you give a particularly good blowjob that day

Likes having you go down on him as foreplay, but prefers penetration as an end goal

Into the classic missionary and launchpad positions so he can see your expression clearly as he overstimulates/edges you

Likes seeing you look up at him through those teary eyes <3

But also very into doggy style

Likes fucking you into the sheets in general, so any position adjacent to that is on his favorites list

um his fingering game is so strong

In the mornings, likes slowly fucking you from behind while spooning you so he can also grab onto your tits or play with your clit

His end goal always is to make you feel so fucking good, it just manifests differently than service tops like Seonghwa or Yunho

Very private about your sex life and not into public sex at all

Possessive in that way. Only he can touch you like that, see you like that, hear your moans like that, etc

Likes hearing you confirm that 

“Only I can make you scream like this”

“Who fucks you this good, huh?”

“C’mon, say it louder.” 

Has one hell of a degradation kink (giving) me thinks

Likes it when you talk back, lowkey likes brat taming when he’s in a dom mood

But does like teasing you in public and keeping it like that until you both find a bedroom, gets off on the idea of you both having to hide your neediness in public

Very little people expect that from just seeing you both together in regular settings 

But little do they know despite the two of you innocently sitting together eating brunch with the team, leaving a few inches for jesus, y’all just had the freakiest sex before getting there. Like you’re literally shifting around in your seat as the soreness kicks in, and Yeosang is smirking ever so slightly at your discomfort

Will rest a heavy head on your upper thigh for a few seconds, brushing his pinky finger against your clothed clit through the thin fabric of your outfit, as he reaches for the bread basket 

Likes hearing that little gasp leaving your lips

Knows he’s leaving you very frustrated and will use that to his advantage later

The whole time, he has the most innocent, fair expression on his face

when he’s a sub tho?

similar vibes. wants you to feel good. 

Still wants to dirty talk, but it’s far more subservient now

one quick way to get him into subspace

if you push him far enough, then he’s so pouty and clingy and fucking cute

It’s so rare to see him like this but always such a treat

favorite positions is to have you ride him and he’ll play with your tits

or he’s still fucking you into the sheets but you are 100% in control

Just imagine him all whiny and teary as he fucks into you, begging you to let him cum as your clench your walls purposely around him, making him yelp as he tries to still his shaking thighs to wait for your signal

actually can be quite obedient as a sub

truly will do his best to be your good boy 

Anyways, aftercare is pretty good with him. He’s very caring and gentle and checks in a lot with you (he better, usually he fucks quite a few rounds out of you)

If he’s fucked out tho, make sure he is also taken care of! As a sub, he follows your orders so well so he’ll probably fall asleep so fast after intensely cumming for the nth time 

At the very least wipes you both down clean with a warm washcloth and kisses you to sleep

Likes spooning you at the end :’)

give him his cuddles </3

masterlist

[penny-quinn]

Eu.ph.oria

Pairing :Enhypen jungwon× reader

Genre : fluff, enemies to lovers

Requested: yes by @nanasmitek

Word count: 1.7k

Authors note : I hope y'all like it. Honestly, i wasn't planning on writing like this but it just kinda happened. It's quite a new format to write but I hope you all enjoy it.

Tagging: @sweetrainwrites @diffuserlover @dimplehyunn @nikieskoo @azure-arcanum @fairycob @jungwon-luv-bot-returns @shrutiajit

(the feeling or state of intense excitement and happiness)

The shameless diary of a teenager's life.

April 17

I hate him, the way he arrogantly chitchats; of how he does nothing yet girls are always flaunting over him. I just hate his existence.

Met Jungwon at the summer camp and it was the worst(actually no, I didn't know anyone besides him and since I'm so not good at socializing I just kinda stick to him) day.

So I shout, he shouts , we shout and the teacher shouts. The end.

We had water guns throwing at each other and I swear it was very brutally fun.

April 23

was the first day to senior high and here's the thing. Teachers are those petty creatures who always arrange your seat with your hated ones.

I HATE JUNGWON, literally every person in the school knows this and yet why? Am I always paired with him?Why the heck man.

Like The guys in puberty, they are Hella annoying and Jungwon, he's the supreme of them all.

May 4

Are my feet a garbage bin? No! But that four eyed Jungwon couldn't care less as he dumped all those pencil dusts in my shoes. And as It was-not-so-my-day I just dumped mine at his cuz it was a tit-for-tat.

May 15

Went to the swimming pool with the class. Caught jungwon staring at me? And glancing at him, I saw those firm abs? Hate to admit it but they were some eye-catching stuff.

May 29

Was cleaning the gym with my freaking pair jungwon. While I did all the work he couldn't even turn the lights off?

Does humanity even exist in this world?

Sulked about it to mom and like always, all she says is to look at him in a different light; but in a different light I see the devil's horns in his Shadows.

June 1

Was fighting with Jungwon like usual but when his fingers scratched my cheeks he immediately tried to treat it.

My heart skipped a beat as I was caught off guard. What's wrong with me? What's wrong with him?

Knowing him, he doesn't even spare a glance at unwanted people; maybe it's all my delusion.

June 6

As we share the desk, my legs brush off against his; he kinda hits my legs saying that I crossed territory. Who cares? I said as I too hit him. And that's how we both fiddled our legs underneath the desk.

Lately I've been smiling a lot.

June 20

Been busy with studies. Cramping with these piles of homework. But the football tournament with other schools was such a refreshment.

Cheered on top of my lungs, and when we had won; I felt that even among the crowds jungwon was staring at me and winked?

Although sweat was dripping off him, cannot lie he did look dashing. Uhh, that evil devil.

July 2

The exams have started and just when I was gonna cheat from a fellow front desk classmate, Jungwon raised his hands and brought the teacher to our place.

Literally, he really is the evil creation of god.

July 11

Exams have ended and I went shopping with wooyoung. BESTIE and I were at the ice cream parlor weeping over our results cause it wasn't as good as expected.

And there arrives Jake and jungwon. Saw us and had some talk. As arrogant as Jungwon was, he shows off saying the exams were as simple as playing in the sand. Wtf?

July 19

Results are out and I cry all day in my room. Where does all my hardwork go huh? To my tummy? With the food?

Mom consulted me with some chocolate cake. It's very delicious.

July 20

Jungwon said that he'll give me tutoring lessons. Everyday after school at the coffee shop on Sixth Street.

Didn't want to but I am in desperate need of help. I have always been taught to never be shy in terms of education and free offer? From top grader jungwon? Why not?

August 1

The lessons have been going smoothly and so has my tutoring. Had some days where we would actually go to him or my home to study but it was all chill.

He's not as annoying as he used to be but it's still there.

August 9

Wonnie lets out the worst and most hilarious jokes which never fails to make me laugh.

"The sexy kimbap?" "Nude kimbap!"

It was the highlight of the day;

August 14

There Was a festival at school today. It felt surreal as Jungwon treated me.He bought me cotton candy, a cute keyring of Winnie the Pooh, and had some hot-out-of-the-oven- cheese pizza.

It was definitely a fun day. The reason he treated me was because he lost at rock-scissor-paper to me in the tutoring session.

August 29

Feels weird to say it but jungwon farts really badly. 😂. In the tutoring class, he farts out loud.

Our own little inside joke " black magic = fart"

September 3

Jungwons sick and hasn't attended the class for a while. I feel weirdly out of place. Got no one to talk to except to wooyoung. I guess I kinda miss him.

Am I going insane?

September 10

Wonnie has returned. Exams have started. I have a good feeling this term.

September 31

When? How? I don't know but Jungwon and I ended up having a deep conversation about red threads and It was a blissful moment.

October 4

Just for the sake of fashion I wore a thin skirt with a half sleeved top. It was freezing and Jungwon gave me his football team jacket to wear.

It smelled just like him; and it was warm. Wooyoung teased me so much, cause the back had a huge "YANG JUNGWON" written .t_t

October 13

Sports day is coming up. While Wooyoung and I belong to the Red House, Jungwon belongs to the Yellow house.

During the house competitions he secretly enters our place and takes me away.

He takes me out of the crowd and gives me him, sherpa-denim jacket. It was a warm gesture.

October 15

Wonnie and I, we've got a lot closer than before. Maybe mom was right, I failed to see his other side because of my hatred but I do now. And it's not that bad.

Although we do argue at small things like "biology is better or physics?"

In the games, Jungwon shined at all of them . I like how he tries his best at everything.

October 28

"You seem like the type to love 'em and leave 'em

And disappear right after this song

So give me the night to show you, hold you

Don't leave me out here dancing alone"

Jungwon casually sings it aloud at class and those lyrics? He specifically glazed at me with something i-dunno-how-to-explain. And my cheeks had gone red; and when he saw that he smirked and sang ``Let me show you what you're missin', paradise" and once the song ended he started to tease me like an apple.

November 5

Strangely I've had this weird feeling inside my heart. Every time I look at Jungwon, my heart beats out aloud. Thinking about him makes me happy and my days become beautiful.

But I don't like this, what has he done to my heart.

November 11

I have been ignoring Jungwon, because what I am experiencing are some profound feelings that are causing a turbulence in my heart.

Had a girls day with wooyoung. She was persistent that I tell her everything and I did. I had to because I'm not very good at stuff like these.

"You like him, like duh?" She says and it was like a slap to my face.

Why oh why? We had barely become friends and now this?

November 15

Wonnie traps me in the hallway. My back was facing the wall while His hands were firmly placed at both sides not allowing me to leave.

He questioned me as to why I had been ignoring. How could I have told him that I liked him huh? We use to be enemies and with this twist of events,i-

I just couldn't. I wa scared and acted as if I was annoyed and I-

I left. His eyes, they held sadness and I couldn't look no more.

December 6

Winter vacation starts. But I had a gloomy heart. Hopefully, travelling tos grandma's home would give me some strength.

January 2

Classes resumed. But I still couldn't find the courage to glance at him. Hopefully he spoke first because the tension between us was eating my heart out.

"Hey, how was-

How was your vacation?"

And that's how it all started again.

January 7

These days I start to notice his little things. Of how he loved cats but he didn't dare to go near 'um.

His love for dalgona, his little squeaks while he ate something tasty. The more that I know him the more I want to. Something inside me has started to change but I like it because my days are again becoming sweet like candy.

January 11

"I was so much younger yesterday" I thought as I went to jungwon. With a chocolate box.

After the girls nights with wooyoung, I had decided to confess to him because it was now or never-

"Hey Jungwon," I greeted him.

"Hey, what's up?" He got up as he was just playing around with Jake at ground

" Wanna come with me to the roof?" You offer and he gives a nod.

Once we were at the top of the building we went near the grills. The view from there was awesome but my heart was beating like crazy

"So, let's-

Let me get this straight. I-

I LIKE YOU" I said. I had finally said it out loud. My palms were literally sweating and my face was a blushing red mess. My eyes were closed and my hands were reaching out giving him the chocolate box.

The silence had filled the air. As I looked up, I could see that he was holding his laughter."you stupid! Why would he ever even accept you? Oh my stupid ass with a delulu brain" I cursed at myself. But to the latter, his cheeks; they had a tint of red. He kept touching his nose as he stares deep into my eyes and says

"I like you too"

And at that moment, he was the cause of my euphoria.

[ithinkilikeit-reactions]

Yunho “Boyfriend Headcanons”

// Hongjoong version // Seonghwa version // Yunho version // Yeosang version // San version // Mingi version // Wooyoung version // Jongho version //

- Excuse me while i go off here

- I love him so much 

- He’s my bias so I apologize if I go overboard

- Yunho is just so bubbly it’s fantastic

- He’s so funny and positive and that’s why I like him 

- As far as a first date goes

- Something energetic for sure

- something just very fun that allows you both to talk and get to know eachother

- something with little pressure 

- because Yunho can get shy and if he’s nervous he’s a mess

- a cute mess but a mess none the less

- so maybe grabbing some coffee/hot chocolate/tea to go 

- going to a park and walking around and talking

- His ears would be bright red the whole time

- it’s his tell 

- but it’s really cute

- especially when you notice and comment on it because it’s cute

- *cue the ears getting redder *

- Definitely taking a stop at the playground and having him push you on the swings

- going down the slide together 

- being literal 5 year olds but that’s okay because cute

- Might kiss you on the swing

- only if he feels it’s right and you’re down though

- Will walk you home or to your bus or car afterwards

- instantly text you after having been on your date

- very sweet and tells you how much fun he had

- kind of crashes at the dorm in his bed and does a little excited wiggle

- definitely tells the members all about it

- Yunho gets so excited about the smallest things

- that kind of makes you get excited about small things too

- it’s just very hard to be unhappy while Yunho is happy

- he’s very good at cheering you up

- and problem solving

- very much the type to hold you close and comfort you

- his hands rubbing over your back and through your hair

- after your done getting it all out

- he’s down to help solve your problems

- When Yunho’s upset

- it’s easy to tell

- his ears are red and he’s not smiling

- Yunho doesn’t try to hide it either

- he vents and wants you to hold him and help him

- his pout is the cutest though as he rants

- just help him

- let the golden retriever wag his tail again

- It’s just always very hard to see a positive person very down

- Arguments with Yunho are... odd? 

- If any of you guys have seen ‘How I met your mother’ 

- I imagine the arguments being like Marshall and Lily’s arguments

- Being angry and snippy with eachother 

- but also just needing a break from the argument and putting it on pause sometimes

- just because you need eachother’s comfort 

-If he does something wrong

- he apologizes in weird ways but ways that make sense to you both

- like with inside jokes and small gestures he know you love

- Cuddling with Yunho is great

- Like I can’t describe it any other way

- Your head tucked under his chin and his arms locked around you

- legs tangled 

- You sleep like this too

- Also morning Yunho?

- The cutest

- His little puffy cheeks and tired expression are precious

- Yunho loves Harry Potter

- so if you get sorted into a different house than him

- I’m sorry

- it’s over

- jk but he will constantly remind you when you watch the movies

- You guys watch the movies maybe once a month

- Also he wants to read them but doesn’t really like reading

- so before bed sometimes you read the books to him

- One chapter a night and slowly but surely you’ll make it through the series

- He loves it and just stares at you lovingly while you read

- extra points if you try and make voice for the characters

- it just makes reading more tolerable for him

- Definitely loves teaching you dances too

- he hopes one day to choreograph a duet for the two of you

- not to perform necessarily but just for you two

- You don’t even need to be able to dance

- he’ll teach you 

- Mingi will help too

- it’s a lot of fun with those 2 together and dancing

- Yunho just loves your support at practice too

- Watching you watch him dance 

- it feeds his ego a little and it’s really cute

- You love it when Yunho is confident

- You love watching him on stage

- When the whole group is doing their more serious concepts

- it’s just so fantastic to see his bright smile anyways because he can’t help it

- Always tell him when your proud of him

- Believe me his smile is worth it

- He does the same for you too

- You could have done the simplest task 

- Yunho will still tell you he’s proud of you

- It’s important to him too

- Definitely loves playing video games with you

- The members always talk about how Yunho never gets a game without thinking of the members because he wants to be able to play together

- So group game nights with you are also very important to him

- Being cheesy infront of everyone on these nights also happen

- sitting in Yunho’s lap or between his legs

- You tend to ask him to sing for you a lot

- because his voice is so soft and lovely

- I have this image in my head

- of you both laying down in bed on your sides

- looking at eachother 

- him holding your hand and rubbing circles with his thumb

- all while he’s singing to you softly

- just absolutely precious

- Going to the convenience store late at night happens alot too

- grabbing your favorite ice cream and then going to a near by playground to eat it and mess around on the swings

- on your own you wouldn’t feel safe doing that

- but with Yunho

- nothing really seems scary

- he’s protective

- not in an overbaring way whatsoever

- But if you need his help

- or someone is bothering you

- he will fight if it comes down to it

- he protects his own

- he does it for you, his family and Ateez (his other family)

- Yunho loves seeing you hang out with his little brother too 

- when you visit his parents house

- play video games with his little brother

- Gunho probably thinks you’re the coolest which makes Yunho really happy

- he loves seeing the people around him get along

- he’s not really jealous at all

- I can’t imagine Yunho getting jealous

- He puts a lot of trust into your relationship 

- so he doesn’t feel the need to get jealous

- even if you give someone attention 

- he knows it’s probably not the way his mind is trying to make him think it is

- thinks about things before acting on it

- Okay kids look away the adults are speaking

- okay 

- soft dom all the way 

- no denying it at all

- has a really hard time being a hard dom 

-it just makes him slightly uncomfortable 

- so don’t make him do it 

- size kink (are we surprised... the answer is NO)

- Has a thing for seeing his large cover parts of your body

- if that makes sense? 

- just likes the visual of it all

- I think it also fuel that protector aspect to him as well

- he likes to think of himself as your big strong protector

- doesn’t really get very rough during sex because of this

- always wants you feeling safe with him  

- does absolutely love being on top and having you under him though

- Loves it when you love his hands 

- guide his hands where you want them 

- lacing your fingers with his 

- it’s all just so stimulating to him

- Loves holding onto your ass when you have sex

- doesn’t matter if it’s big, small, round, flat etc 

- he loves your butt and thighs

- Yunho also really loves it when you give him a blowjob

- Especially when he’s stressed 

- God he loves it

- He can hardly hold his hips still

- He can barely keep quiet

- fingers tangled in your hair as you suck him off 

- also the visual of your lips wrapped around him 10/10 

- killer about praise

- compliments you all the time 

- Also has a thing for fucking you while you wear his clothes

- especially big hoodies

- Also has a big thing for fingering? 

- I mean have you seen his hands

- he just loves knowing that his fingers do so much to you

- very into slow passionate sex 

- especially when it’s completely reliant on the pace he sets 

- and the way he rolls his hips

- god okay i need to stop this before it gets too long

- Aftercare

- Looks at you with the biggest puppy eyes

- he’s filled with so much love and he can share it with you 

- that’s how he looks at you not just after sex but all the time

- you just notice it more after sex

- petting your hair gently, asking if you need anything

- water? 

- food? 

- cuddles?

- a bath? 

- he’ll do it for you all you have to do is ask

- otherwise aftercare isn’t so intense

- just a lot of soft touches and holding eachother

- maybe a chapter of harry potter read to you by him for a change 

- even though he doesn’t like reading

- depending on how tired you both are though

- loves holding your face and nestling his forehead against yours 

- kissing your nose and cheeks and lips repeatedly

- he’s just so sweet to you all the time

- Yunho really expects the same from you too

- You two are the sweetest couple

- the couple that’s more like best friends

- you share everything because Yunho is so giving

- You two are a couple that seems sweet together on the surface

- and is even sweeter on the inside

A/N: we been knew that I love Yunho so much prime bf material. 

[blvejeanbaby]

4 times we almost kissed + 1 time we actually did

Pairing: Seonghwa x reader Word count: 2956

i. cabin

The cabin was almost completely silent, there were just a few snores from the boys’ room. Somehow the log cabin lended itself to a perfect split between the girls and the boys, the common area being in the middle of both dormitories. It was in this common area that you found yourself, the clock having just struck 3 AM. The kitchen was dark but you didn’t bother turning on the light solely for tea making purposes.

Perhaps it was for that reason that you jumped at the light switch being turned on. You spun around, ready to use your tea spoon as a weapon, only to find an equally as shocked Seonghwa. You relaxed and lowered your spoon. “Sorry,” you chuckled, a little bit embarrassed. “I thought you were an intruder or something.”

“Did the ghost stories scare you?” Seonghwa opened the fridge and grabbed a milk carton, leaning against the counter top as he drank from it. You had felt his eyes on you earlier that evening, while all of you were gathered around the bonfire to exchange ghost stories. Normally you were all down for a good ghost story, but the proximity of the cabin to a forest that was suspected to be haunted, hadn’t sat well with you.

“A little,” you said, shovelling sugar into your tea.

“That’s not going to help you sleep,” he said, his eyebrows raised.

You shrugged. “I think my sleep rhythm is beyond saving anyway.” You stirred your cup, setting it a little further away from the edge to wait for it to cool down a little. “So what is keeping you up? If you want to share, of course?”

Seonghwa crumpled up the empty milk carton and threw it in the trash can. “I don’t know. New environments, maybe.” He shrugged and spun back around to face you. “Do you want me to read to you?”

“Read to me?” you raised an eyebrow at him. Was he kidding?

There was something that on other people you would have described as a blush, but seeing as you had never seen Seonghwa blush before, you weren’t sure if your eyes were playing tricks on you or not. “My mother always used to do that when I was little. It would help me sleep.”

“I don’t think there’s any bed time stories in this cabin. Just the Bible.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll make something up.”

You looked at Seonghwa, his sincere expression and how cuddly he looked in his pyjama’s; checkered pyjama bottoms and a fuzzy sweater. So you nodded, taking your tea with you to the couch, where Seonghwa built you both a comfortable space on the couch, with blankets and pillows. You wanted to sit on the opposite end of the couch, but he softly pulled you near him, so you were laying in between his legs, your head resting on his chest. You weren’t sure this was necessary for his bed time story to lull you to sleep, but you didn’t complain, happy to be in his arms, his body heat and the blanket instantly making you sleepier than you had been in your own room. You had never been as close to him as right now and it was making your head spin.

“Once upon a time,” Seonghwa started, already making you giggle. “What?” he said.

“Does the story really have to start with ‘once upon a time?’”

“Don’t you like fairytales?”

You weren’t sure what to say. This moment sure felt like a fairytale to you, and if not a fairytale, then a ridiculously cheesy romcom. You didn’t think this was your life. You shifted a little bit in Seonghwa’s arms, now facing him. “I think they could never be true.”

“How could I prove you wrong? Certain fairytales can come true.”

You shrugged. “Be creative.”

“I’m trying.” Was Seonghwa’s face always this close? Was he always this beautiful? No, not beautiful - handsome? Breathtaking? You were sure something was about to happen, something past friendship and telling you bed time stories, when there was a loud cough.

“I didn’t think I’d wake up to this.” It was Wooyoung, standing on the threshold of the boys’ dormitory. He followed that up sarcastically with: “Oh no, don’t stop on my account.”

You groaned, no longer feeling comfortable enough to be in Seonghwa’s arms like that. “Good night, Hwa,” you said, standing up and taking your tea into the girls’ bedroom.

ii. convenience store

After the time spent at the cabin, it was safe to say you were a little uncomfortable around both Seonghwa and Wooyoung. It was only when the weather turned sunny and warm and the air smelled like blooming flowers again, that you could handle being around either of them on your own.

To celebrate the good weather conditions, your friend group had decided to go out for a picnic in the park. Yeosang had been in charge of getting blankets and cutlery while everyone else brought food and drinks. Eventually the sun started going down and it was decided that you were going to order pizzas to the park. You deemed it coincidence that you ended up being the one to accompany Seonghwa to the convenience store to get the group more drinks.

“Do you know what brand Hongjoong likes?” you asked. Seonghwa had already secured the fizzy drinks for those who didn’t want alcohol while you were attending to those who liked a healthy amount of alcohol once in a while. You had already grabbed the soju and now you were contemplating what type of wine to get. You knew what you liked yourself, but you were trying out 30 days of sobriety and was sticking to fizzy drinks today. You didn’t know the brands your guy friends liked.

“That one.” Seonghwa grabbed it from the shelf and put it in your cart. At this angle, if he looked up, you were sure you were going to be imagining all sorts of things for decades.

“Need anything else?” you asked, scraping your throat lightly. His close proximity to you made you slightly uncomfortable.

He straightened up. “Dessert?”

The previous flicker of a thought compared with Seonghwa’s intense gaze made you gulp. You knew the day was hot, but had the airconditioning in the convenience store suddenly cut out? “U-uh, what kind of-” You nearly tripped backwards over the cart in your attempts to shuffle away from Seonghwa’s intensity. He caught you before you could crash into the shelves behind you and bring down all of the bottles of wine, avoiding a tragedy. But now he was even closer to you.

You gulped and lightly pushed him away. “Thanks. Let’s get mochi.” You spun and almost ran down the aisle, Seonghwa following at a distance.

iii. party

The top you were wearing was downright scandalous and you knew it. Or at least, it was scandalous to your standards. There were other girls at the party who were wearing next to nothing, covering up even less of their bodies than you. And you applauded them for their confidence.

“Another drink?” Yunho held up a bottle of wine, his cheeks rosy with intoxication and his smile wide.

“Sure,” you said, holding out your glass for him to fill up again. You had been drinking a lot tonight, having given up your streak of sobriety - mixes of liquor and soda at first, but now that all of the liquor was gone, you had switched to wine.

“Pour me one too.” Seonghwa suddenly popped up at Yunho’s side, his smile wide. You watched as he held out his glass for Yunho to fill, your attention staying with Seonghwa. If your outfit was scandalous for your standards, then his was too for his standards. The majority of his blouse was see-through, he had layered necklaces on that caught everyone’s attention, judging by the way you had seen some girls pull on them before, trying to lure him in. But he had been too busy hanging with his friends.

“I’m grabbing another bottle,” Yunho announced, holding up the now empty bottle and his own empty glass. He was gone before you could say anything, leaving you and Seonghwa by yourselves in the kitchen.

For a moment it was silent, safe for the noises from the living room flooding in. And then Seonghwa spoke up: “Was it fun?”

“Was what fun?” You brought your glass to your mouth, not really drinking from it, but instead taking the rim in between your teeth.

“Making out with Jongho?”

You cocked your head to the side, looking up at Seonghwa. It was very obvious that he was drunk, more so than you had suspected before. You could see it in his body language, as well as there being something about his face that betrayed it to you. You bit your lip, deciding whether or not to play a little with Seonghwa, teasing him about kissing Jongho. It had been fun, yes, but you weren’t really attracted to Jongho and he wasn’t to you. It was just a passing of drunk time at a party.

“Hmm... he’s the best kisser I know.”

Seonghwa’s face clouded only for a split second. His glass of wine discarded to the counter top beside you, his fingers curling around your belt loops to pull you closer. “I think you should re-evaluate.” He tilted his head slightly and you were very, very sure that this was the moment the tension between you and Seonghwa would finally break when-

“I got another bottle of wine!” Yunho excitedly came into the kitchen, making you and Seonghwa nearly spring apart. “Anyone need a refill?”

v. hallway

“Y/N,” this was San, his enthusiasm clearly visible on his face. “Since you chose truth, you’re going to have to tell us why you don’t have a boyfriend.”

“We’ve gone over this,” you said, exasperated. This was a hot topic whenever any of the guys got tipsy enough to ask. And every time you kind of wanted to tell them to fuck off. But they were your friends and you just couldn’t - but this kind of situation was like going to your family dinner party and being bombarded with the same types of questions over and over again. “I’m just waiting for the right person to ask me.”

“What’s your ideal type?” Jongho asked. The serious look on his face and the lack of alcohol in his body, considering he was on a diet, made you wonder what exactly his motivations were for asking.

You eyed him suspiciously before answering: “I’m not telling.”

“Please!” Wooyoung looked at you with puppy eyes. “If you’re not going to tell, I’m going to assume your ideal type is me.”

“Well, it’s not,” you said. “We’re done discussing. Next. Who’s next?” You looked around the circle of your friends. Yunho looked at you sympathetically,  Wooyoung looked a little hurt at your comment, the others seemed to want you to continue on talking. Even Seonghwa looked as though he wanted to know the truth. You sighed. “Fine. My ideal type... Someone who always has my back and is there for me, who makes me feel comfortable.”

“And physically?” Mingi leaned forward.

“Ugh, really, guys?” You looked around the room again, this time in disbelief. “Y’all are really annoying. Fine. Physically - dark hair, tall. Strong build. Now, who was next?”

“Me,” said Yunho, quick to save you. You sent him a grateful smile. After his turn, you excused yourself to grab another drink from the kitchen. You were surprised to see Wooyoung jump up and offer to help you carry drinks and snacks for the others as well.

“You know, Y/N,” he said as you were safely in the kitchen, “you just described Seonghwa word for word.”

“Did not,” you said, cheeks already heating up at the suggestion.

“So he’s not tall? Doesn’t have muscles? His hair is blonde?”

You glanced over your shoulder at Seonghwa, who was perfectly visible from your spot in the kitchen. He was laughing at something Mingi had said, both of their smiles contagious even from this distance. “Technically, his hair is steel blue, which I wouldn’t consider dark,” you said, turning back to grab a new bottle of vodka. “Why do you care so much?”

“I only care about the truth. And the truth is that you’re head over heels for Seonghwa.” Wooyoung grabbed a bottle of some fruit juice to mix the vodka with. “I don’t know how no one else has noticed that you two are having a little thing going on. I’ve seen you cuddling on the couch at the cabin and I’m not going to let you live that down until you two get together.”

“Which will be never.” You tried to keep the disappointment out of your voice as you said so, going back into the living room. “Vodka!” You waved the bottle around as San flocked to it. Jongho looked wistfully at the bottle.

“Hey, Y/N, can I talk to you for a second?” Seonghwa asked.

You heard a snicker behind you from who could only be Wooyoung. “Sure,” you said, following Seonghwa out to the hallway again. You weren’t entirely sure what he was going to say. Did he want to talk about your ideal type? Or about your almost-kiss at the party the other day?

“This is actually a dare,” Seonghwa said as soon as you were out in the hallway. “Yeosang dared me to tell one of us a secret. So I thought I’d tell you.”

“A secret?” You frowned a little.

He nodded. He didn’t even seem remotely nervous, but you were sure it was the alcohol in his system. “I have a crush. And the longer I don’t act on it, the crazier I go.”

You felt your heart beat at least five times as faster than normal. Was this the result of the confession of your ideal type? Or was this something entirely different? “So act on it,” you said. “Act on that crush.”

“Okay.” Seonghwa said, his voice breathless. You gulped as he leaned in closer to you. He was going to back you up against the wall, his face was as close to yours as it had been the night at the cabin and -

“Oh, I’m sorry.” It was Jongho. You groaned as Seonghwa stepped back hastily. “My bad. I-I’ll leave again.” He spun around and was back in the livingroom within a second, but whatever had possessed Seonghwa to try and kiss you, had vanished and you were left with just an awkward situation.

vi. kitchen

“Today we’re making Oreo cheesecake,” you said, holding up your package or Oreo cookies and the mix for the cheesecake, acting like you were in a cooking show. “It’s my best recipe. Also the only recipe I know.”

“Luckily she has me.” Seonghwa bent down a little so he could get his face in frame as well as he waved at Hongjoong.

“You wouldn’t be able to distinguish cheesecake from cheese if you tried,” you said, rolling your eyes at Seonghwa, who shot Hongjoong a look that said “This girl drives me crazy!” “Don’t listen to him, Joongie. He doesn’t know what he’s saying.”

“Just make sure the cake’s finished when we all get to your place. Otherwise Yeosang doesn’t have a cake.”

“Don’t worry, Joongie,” you said, flashing him a smile. Seonghwa bent down again to wave goodbye to Hongjoong as he hung up and then it was just the two of you again. In your kitchen. “Okay, so we have to start with separating the cookies- Is there a reason you’re staring at me like that?”

Seonghwa blushed heavily and tore his eyes away from you, grabbing another package or Oreo cookies. “Separating the cookies. Okay. Scraping the white off?”

“Yes...” You got to work on the other package and soon enough the ingredients were all mixed together and in the baking mold, ready to spend a few hours in the fridge to firm up. “I can’t wait to taste it,” you said excitedly, shutting the fridge - and getting pushed up against it almost immediately.

“I can’t wait to taste you,” Seonghwa said, his head dipping to the side, suddenly so close to yours. At the feeling of his breath hitting your lips, your breath hitched. There was nothing and no one to interrupt you now and whereas before you might have pushed him away, there was no hair on your body now that would have dreamed of that. Instead you wrapped your arms around his neck and brought him in, lips pressing together softly.

The kiss started off annoyingly innocent, as if you were two five year olds experiencing a crush for the first time in your lives. Soon enough however, the kiss transformed into something more. It suddenly seemed a lot more plausible that Seonghwa could put his words into action.

A heat spread from your lips, throughout your body, all the way to your toes, lifting you up like a balloon drifting to the skies. It was Seonghwa’s arms around your waist keeping your feet on the ground, pressing your body against his. He was warm and his body was sturdy and so different from the way you had always imagined.

When Seonghwa pulled away you chased after his lips, but he stopped you. “Did I overstep your boundaries?”

“Would I have kissed you the way I did if you had?”

“I guess not,” he said, a hint of shyness on his face.

“Does this mean you’re finally going to ask me to be your girlfriend?”

“Only if you’re going to say yes.”

“Yes.” The smile that broke out on his face was mesmerizing.

[closer-stars]

Gut Feeling (4)

Member: San Genre: Angst???? Just a lot of discomfort and tension tbh Word Count: 12k (what the actual--) Requested: Yes Content: Like what I said, lots of discomfort in this. Anyways yay tension. Food mention bec people need to eat. Idol life is messy as heck. :flashes a peace sign through the stress: Also roughly around last few weeks of inception going thanxx promotions lmao  Note: One month later, Part 4 is here. Apologies for the late delivery, my mental health really took a dive with everything happening lately. Things are kind of looking up but not entirely. Also this idea really marinated in my head that’s why it’s so long... So much you could do with this prompt tbh. TY to @hwaberrykiwi @yeocult @yeochikin and @barsformars for dealing with out of the blue messages regarding this fic when I was writing-- disregarding the weeks long silence from me.... hahah ily i’ll link the previous parts after a day just so this could appear in the tags lol

Part 3

The past few days have been quiet. Nothing came up between the two of you since that night. Nothing came up but things have quieted down. You can only suppose that it’s because of how exhausting it has been. At least that’s what you think when you try to rationalize it to the strained schedules getting to him now. That’s the only way you’ve been able to keep yourself together in front of everyone, by rationalizing everything that feels off with exhaustion. 

It works to a degree. The makeup covers up the lack of sleep beneath their eyes but it can’t add to the needed sparkle in their eyes. That’s where the ring lights come in. Everything physical can be fixed with makeup and lighting, that’s what the industry does. But emotional? That’s another thing altogether. 

Things were technically smooth sailing despite the chaos. You still go home late, just not for the usual reasons. You still go home late when the members stay late in the studio but that isn’t often at this point. They’re still human, they need rest. On the other hand, Hongjoong still goes to the studio though not to the point where Seonghwa has to pester him to go home. You bring Hongjoong home often now. During this leg of promotions, it’s Yoon who brings them to the first half of their schedules, Bae brings them to the second half-- it’s not easy waking up at 4am just to bring eight boys to their schedules. You’re in charge when it comes to the late night schedules. At least this way, you don’t have to talk to them since they’re too worn from the day’s activities. 

Hongjoong sits on the passenger seat next to you, busy eating the dinner you had bought for him. The ride home is quiet, just him munching on his much needed meal and the ice cubes in your respective drinks. 

“Manager-nim?” He speaks up carefully. 

You hum in response, still not tearing your eyes away from the road. 

“Has San been okay?” 

That catches you off guard for a moment. “As far as I know, yes? Did something happen?” Something that didn’t revolve around _that_. 

He sips on his coffee for a moment, mulling over your words. “He’s just been in his head more often nowadays, I thought he might have talked to you about what’s on his mind.” He reasons softly against the lid of his cup. Now he’s not the type to force his members to talk to him about their issues, they do have a day where they gather and talk about concerns from the past week and the upcoming week. Despite that, there are some worries that can’t wait for the weekly session. 

You hum in thought. That’s not good. “He hasn’t told me anything.” You return. How can he? He’s often at the farthest end of the car, slumped over catching up on rest. “Is there something I need to be aware of, Hongjoong?” 

Your words cause him to laugh thoughtfully. “You’d think because I’m the leader, I’d know what’s on their minds…” He starts. “I don’t know what’s on his mind, much less know what could have happened. If he does tell you something that I might need to know...” He trails off, but you understand where he’s trying to get. 

“I know.” You return gently. You had your doubts that he’d talk about it, especially to you. “Don’t push yourself too hard on it regardless. Though, I do think he talks to Seonghwa or Wooyoung about these kinds of stuff doesn’t he?”

“That’s true.” You can tell that the air in the car has eased a little and with that the rest of the drive has turned quiet. 

Upon arriving home, Hongjoong slides off his seat, rearranging his things. Considering the two of you lived in the same building, it was still the two of you on the way up. Perhaps San learned this habit from his hyungs? 

Now that you think of it, you wonder how San has been. You know how tired he is when there’s no cameras around but still he gives so much for the team.

“Manager-nim?” He says carefully while the two of you wait for the elevator to bring you to your designated floors. You respond with a soft hum. “If the boys start to act up, please tell me. I know you’re the manager but sometimes they get too much to handle, I can keep them in line too.” His words cause the corner of your lips to quirk upwards, touched by his worry. 

“It’s okay, Hongjoong. I can still handle you boys.” You tease lightly as you shake off his concern lightly. When the elevator alerts the two of you that you had arrived at his floor, that’s when he realizes that you didn’t press your floor number.

“Hey--!” It’s moments like this that remind you that they’re the youngest in their families. At his complaint, you shoo him off.

“Come on, Hongjoong. You need your rest more than I do.” You wave him off, chuckling at his shocked expression. Maybe being someone who works behind the scenes had its perks even outside the work environment. He pouts at you, unable to argue and he bids you good night, thanking you for the safe trip. 

--------

He arrives at the dorm, which was mostly peaceful save for the frantic clicking of the mouse and keyboard tapping. At least there wasn’t much yelling but he didn’t need to peek into their rooms to know that the guys were playing an intense League match. When he gets to his room, he’s greeted by Seonghwa doing his usual home training. At least he had a shirt on this time. 

“I thought today was your rest day.” He said as he hangs his bag on the corner of his bed. 

The other, still in the middle of a plank, manages to rasp out. “Habits. Hold on.” 

Hongjoong lets him finish his set as he changes into something more fitting for sleep. From the way his hair sticks to his skin, Hongjoong could only guess that this was probably his last set for the night. “Go shower first stinky. We can talk after.” 

Seonghwa looks at his roommate in a mix of fake insult and annoyance. “Say that to me after you do your laundry.” 

He looks at his laundry that seems to agree with Seonghwa. He carries the basket to their washing machine. “Now go stinky.” He repeats much to the other’s dismay, already loading it into the machine. 

After Seonghwa has done his usual lengthy shower-- seriously what does he even do? The two fill the other on how the past few hours went. Particularly, the talks with San and you. 

Seonghwa starts it as he dries his hair with his towel. “San didn’t really say much. He was pretty vague about it, something about feelings and something about wanting a re-do.” It’s usually like that at the start for San, he noticed. Always at a loss for words until he lets himself be alone. Regardless, if there’s something he and Hongjoong have, it’s the sixth sense when it comes to the members. 

The leader hums in response. It was a bit of an expected move from the younger one to keep to himself, he does see a little of himself in that kid. He wasn’t that successful in his conversation with you either. “Yeah, they didn’t really say anything with me either.” He does recount to the best of his memory the entire conversation. 

The two of them sit in silence, both concerned over how this could affect the group. Seonghwa then sits up, eyes shining with alarm. “I think he confessed to them.” 

Hongjoong stares at him, dumbfounded by how he reached that conclusion until he remembers how the members often tease him when you’re not around-- he didn’t really join in on it. How he seems to show off a little more whenever you’re around. It’s to the point he even waits for you after you park the car, none of them even do that. He buries his face in his hands, he knows how San takes rejection so harshly. It’s one of the reasons that propelled that boy to dance like his life depended on it. “And I’m guessing, they didn’t accept the confession.” 

The words make the oldest wince. “Choi San….” Seonghwa groans, dropping his body onto his bed. The two of them realize that there’s a situation on hand and they’re not really sure if the other boys know. Some of them could, some of them might not. “We should probably ask Yunho or Wooyoung if he has said anything in the near future.” 

Hongjoong nods at the suggestion, suddenly too exhausted to say anything else. “Let’s just get some sleep for now. We still have one more leg of Inception promotions this coming week.” 

Seonghwa switches the lights off, knowing full well that once Hongjoong’s in bed, there’s no getting him out of it unless it’s the next day. “Sleep well stinky.” 

“Whatever.” 

-------- The Inception promotions end without a hitch… well as smoothly as it can. Considering that there’s now a quiet lull in between the promotions, the boys have been using the time to clean the choreography and eat. It’s not ATEEZ if there’s no food. You only entered the studio towards the end of their practice, slipping quietly to sit next to their stylist and Manager Bae as they fixed the last changes for their performances. The rest of the members are walking around the studio, breathing heavily after what was probably their nth run of their next promotions.

“You’re bringing them home?” You ask him as the stylists show you the plans for their clothes. You’ve seen some of these fits during the photoshoots and music video shoots but some of these were a first. You were sure the boys would look good in these. You take note of the changes, taking a few photos of the sets to transfer to your laptop.

He hums in affirmation, too busy keeping note of the changes they discussed while you were gone. You notice San’s the only one on the floor, everyone else already packing up their things. 

“Are you going to stay late tonight?” You ask him, as he’s still on the floor, too exhausted to pull himself up. 

“Probably not, I promised Yunho I’d play a few matches of League with him.” Silence falls on the two of you, either one unsure of how to continue the conversation, much less on how to end it. Why did you expect him to stay? For more, why did that make you feel a little heavy? 

“Ah.” It was the only thing you could think of at that moment. 

Your reply causes a pit in his stomach to sink. Without thinking, he returns the question for the sake of conversation, even though there was no point in it. He doesn’t know why he still wants to talk to you, knowing that talking to you only puts more strain to him. “Are you?”

At his question, you nod. A flash of confusion on your eyes that are immediately pushed aside for the sake of professionalism. “Yeah, I have to assist in the deals with the externals team. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You don’t give him another word, opting to end the conversation with a polite bow before making your way to the office. It wasn’t the whole truth, nor was it a whole lie. Regardless, you tear your eyes away from him.

Silence trails behind you and keeps San company for the next few moments. He winces to himself, not liking how things are going between the two of you. He pulls himself up when Yunho calls for him. 

On the way out, you’re greeted by Seonghwa’s figure waiting for the rest of the boys. “Oh, hello Seonghwa.” You say out of surprise. “Not grabbing something to drink from 7/11?” 

His eyebrows raise, not expecting someone to greet him at this time of the night. “Manager-nim!” He greets you with a tired smile. “Are you going home soon?” He asks, standing a little straighter this time. “And, I think we have enough drinks at home…” he mumbles though it doesn’t sound that convincing to you. 

His question makes you smile a bit, but you shake your head at his question. “Unfortunately no. I have to do additional work to do with the externals.” 

His eyes widen at your words. “Did we get more offers?” 

His words make you mull over your thoughts. You know of one offer that’s already confirmed but you doubt they’ve been informed. “Let’s just say, you’re really staying true to the whole Back to Zero hint you’ve pulled during your Crescent Party.” You say with a chuckle. 

He doesn’t get enough time to understand the hint you give him-- a taste of their own medicine towards ATINYs when they ask for hints. Wooyoung’s already calling him annoying nicknames to get him moving and you chuckle at the pained expression on his features. “Go home, Seonghwa. Don’t want Wooyoung to annoy you more. You’ll know this once the deals are finalized.” You bid him goodbye, sparing the boys a wave before retreating to your office. 

--------

It’s already the middle of the second leg of promotions and you’re already at your last leg of energy. You probably need around two to three days to recover properly, at this rate. For now, you try to continue forward, the finish line is oh so near. You slip into the studio, not surprised to see the lights still on, but surprised to still hear ATEEZ at this hour. It’s a familiar sight in front of you: eight tired boys on the floor or slumped against the wall. Those with enough energy throw any apprehension out the window and change their tops in the studio. 

“Are you staying late in the studio tonight?” You ask San as you check the time. The boys are already getting ready to head home, San on the other hand hasn’t moved an inch. He’s in his thoughts as he stares at his bag. Your question, though, brings him out of his head and he picks up himself up. It was a question out of habit, months of having done it over and over, it was still a challenge to curb such actions. 

“Yeah. I need to clean my levels.” It only made sense that you’d bring home since you practically live under the same roof. Were you expecting him to say otherwise? Slightly. He doesn’t look at you but he makes his way to the computer again. 

“San! You’re still staying?!” Yunho exclaims, he’s the last out the door to which San acts as if it was a normal thing. 

He laughs at the shock on his member’s face. “Relax, I didn’t like my levels in the last run so I’m doing it again. Go ahead though, Manager-nim’s bringing me home.” 

“Heyy, we all know that means you’re spending another three hours.” The taller returns with a whine. 

You watch the two banter, a small hint of amusement quirking at your lips but you immediately squash that. You tip your head to quietly bring the attention back to what’s at hand. “Just tell me when you’re done, San. I’ll be at the office.” Without missing a beat, you excuse yourself out of the studio. Two pairs of eyes following your retreating figure until you disappear from their sight.

Once you leave, Yunho looks back at the male with a raised brow. “San.” 

The other makes a disgruntled sound at the tone of his voice. He knows what that means but he just can’t get himself to talk to you still. The taller male leaves him be and his shoulders fall once he’s left alone. No matter how many times he runs the choreography does he find himself satisfied with his performance. He can’t put his 100% into this when a part of him still lingers in thoughts of you. The song still plays on loop but he stops dancing for a moment, trying to bring himself into slowly going through each count to focus on what needs to be addressed. It goes well for the most part but in moments where he needs to catch his breath, to ease his parched throat, his mind stumbles to you. He looks at the clock on the computer screen. 

At least he didn’t hit the three hour mark that Yunho betted on. 

He changes into something less uncomfortable than a sweaty shirt before stepping out of the now dark studio in search of you. He sees the office not too far from where he is; he takes a deep breath, one that he associates with exhaustion rather than apprehension as he walks to where you said you’d be. 

He peeks into the office, seeing you with your fingers threaded to your hair as you write and pause for a moment to shift to your laptop. He stays there for a moment, watching you work in your own zone. He watches you work from time to time, but rarely does he see you scowl at your work. The way your eyebrows furrow at what’s in front of you makes him ponder over what could be giving you a hard time. Maybe he should’ve asked you about yourself as well instead of having your interactions be centered around him. You’ve had a few talks with him though mostly centered around his experience and you occasionally have to reign him in when he’s too caught in his emotions. He wonders if this is why you fell for Seonghwa. He shakes his head to shoo these thoughts before he starts looking like a stalker outside the office, so he knocks twice to get your attention. “Hey,” he trails off, clearing his throat. “Are you ready?” He asks softly, standing awkwardly by the door once you look at him. 

You look at the clock. It hasn’t been three hours, well it’s nearly three hours but not quite. “You finished early. Give me ten minutes.” You note as you pack all your things. 

He stays in his spot, eyes roaming the room, seeing small things that differentiate your space from the others. You had small post-its color coded over some sheets of paper that were unreadable from his spot, typical work essentials along with a small corgi plush the size of his palm resting next to a few pens. The small thing makes him smile for a moment, once he sees that you’re ready to get moving, it disappears. He lets you lead the way to the car, popping his earphones in for the long ride home.

It’s quiet for the entire ride home, except for the radio playing whatever the public has been into. You don’t look over at San to know that he has his earphones in, neither of you try to start a conversation. Maybe it was better that way anyways. 

Once you parked the car, you shake his shoulder gently to wake him up. “We’re here.” He wakes up almost immediately unlike the past times where he makes it near impossible to wake him up. He raises his head, slightly disoriented with the scattered lights in the parking lot, he looks to the driver’s seat and you’re already out of the car. He hops out of the car, running his hand through his hair as he tries to wake himself up. The car beeps and you pull at the door to make sure it’s locked. Once satisfied, you walk around and find him already by the elevator. This surprises you but at the same time were you expecting anything else? 

You put on your earphones as well, as you wait for the elevator to arrive. As much as he wants to get on the elevator first, he wasn’t going to let you be on your own at this hour. The doors slide open and the two of you get on, staying on two opposite ends. Your finger presses his floor, out of habit, then you quickly follow it with your floor number. The cool metal shows a hazy image of your reflection, nonetheless you take the chance to look at yourself. Even against this material, your exhaustion is clear. Your eyes linger to the blurry image of San through the walls and his slumped figure as he looks at his phone. Thoughts of how to mend the relationship bubble in your consciousness only to be popped by the elevator arriving at your floor. “Good night.” You say, out of respect. 

“Good night.” He returns under his breath, and he waits for the doors to close behind you before he lets out the breath he’s been holding. Now that it’s just him, he lets out a long frustrated groan. Why couldn’t he get himself to talk to you? To clear things out? He never gave you the chance to explain yourself or himself. He just took your lack of answer as a no and admitted defeat. Would trying to get you and Seonghwa together mend his damn heart? He’s also selfish. He wants you. He doesn’t want to lose to his hyung but Seonghwa is also his hyung. He’s someone he respects and loves like an actual brother. Another turmoil in his head as he watches the number on the screen reach his floor. 

He arrives at his room, greeted by the sight of Yunho playing League without him. “Damn, look at you. You don’t need me to hard carry you through a match.” San muses as he tosses his bag somewhere in the room. He doesn’t know if Yunho even heard him over the constant comments that the game makes over each kill. Regardless, he needs a shower. 

---------

He comes back from his shower and Yunho’s headset rests on his shoulders, scrolling through the internet mindlessly. “Did you get to talk to them?” Yunho asks, his eyes haven’t left the screen-- probably watching someone’s gameplay. 

San lets out a disgruntled sound as he dries his hair. “I didn’t get to, they had their earphones on.” Even to him, this explanation sounds weak. 

Yunho pauses the video then looks at the male, clearly not buying his words. “San.” 

“I’m serious.” San interjects, his face crumpling in discomfort. “Even in the hours of my practice, they were in the office the entire time.” 

“You know, if you just said you weren’t ready to talk to them, that works too.” Leave it to Yunho to cut to the chase. 

His bottom lip juts out at such a strong statement from his peer. “T-that’s one reason too…” He mumbles as he climbs onto his bed, defeated by how quick it was for Yunho to see through him. 

The other male stays on his seat, leaning against the backrest as he watches the other. “There’s no rush, honestly but bro, you really need to talk to them soon. Your own good is for the good of the group too.” 

His words make the younger look at him weirdly. He’s aware of how his heart is on his sleeve since birth but his words make him wonder just how evident his heart is. The look on his face makes Yunho laugh softly, as much as San does his best to look after everyone, Yunho still had the upper hand of being an actual older brother. It felt like he was talking to his younger brother with how confused San was. “It was kind of obvious that you couldn’t put yourself into the practice earlier San. None of us just commented on it because we know you.” 

San falls onto his pillow, half his face covered by the soft material as he shoots rainclouds at the male who is clearly unaffected by his attitude. How can he? Yunho’s right. It’s obvious when he isn’t putting his heart into it. It’s obvious when he’s got something in his mind while he practices or performs. He didn’t want to affect the boys with his personal issues. While he isn’t ready to talk to you, he needs to find a way to separate his personal life with his work life.

His roommate looks at the bothered male with a sympathetic smile. “Let’s figure this out some other time, it’s 3AM we need sleep.” He shuts off his monitor, already making his way to the lights. In a few days time, their THANXX promotions would start. San’s going to need to separate his emotions soon. Maybe those acting classes would actually help. 

--------

It’s D-2 before THANXX promotions and the staff had made sure the boys were eating right. You were grateful for the existence of yogurt and fruits, otherwise having the boys eat their vegetables would be a headache. They’ve been eating enough while making sure to leave room for their rehearsals. Today’s the last day of practicing in their outfits for the future stages. Thankfully, the clothes for the first stage were already ready. 

You and the rest of the staff had marked the studio with colored tape, while those who were in charge of production already rehearsed how the cameras would move. Truth be told, you haven’t kept up with the news but with how the production team was moving, you could only assume that the cases were rising then dropping. The boys do one run in their stage outfits with little to no issues-- save for San having to pin his pants. Once that was all over, the boys talked with the stylists for any minor changes and reviews for this set while you and the others removed the tape from the flooring. 

The same thing happens for the rest of the night: managers eating ahead, switching around to keep an eye on their rehearsals, the boys eating later on then back dancing and singing. Perfectionists but it is expected, this song was more in their comfort zone after all. You’re the last in the office again, Manager Bae bringing them home this time. Brand deals were your worst enemy but they were a high risk, high reward if done right. 

You peek into the studio, seeing the boys already packing up. Manager Bae is off to the side stretching his back after hours of moving around. You toss the keys to him to which he catches with grace, much to the group’s entertainment. 

San catches your eye and you glance over at him. Something in you hardens but you try to keep it subtle. “Heading home early?” 

He’s caught off guard by the question. “Y-yeah, I’m heading home with them tonight. You don’t have to wait for me.” He answers after recovering his composure. He shifts his face to your direction but you don’t meet his eyes. Silence falls over the two of you for a moment. With that, you nod at his words. 

“Is that so? Then, get lots of rest tonight. I’ll see you guys in the morning.” With that, you tip your head to bid him goodbye, shuffling away from him and into your office. You don’t give him time to ask if you were going home as well.

His eyes follow your figure as you quickly leave the room and something in him causes him to let out a sigh. He doesn’t have the heart to stop you, wanting nothing but to relieve his stress with a match or two against Yunho. Hell, even just sleeping doesn’t sound like a bad idea. He lets out another sigh, shoulders dropping lower than usual before he steps out of the studio as well, greeted by the sight of his fellow members, bustling about by the elevator. 

Sometimes being quick on your feet had its perks, for example, you slipped away from the boys before they could see you scurry away to your office. Once you had arrived, you let out the breath you’ve been holding in since you left the studio. Now that you don’t wait for San in the studio anymore, your schedule has gotten a lot freer than expected. While this should be a good thing, your body isn’t used to it and ends up restless. You sink into your chair, looking through your to-do list. You should be accustomed to rapid changes, but this was a change you had trouble getting used to. For months, you did your work in the studio, while San practiced his dancing and singing. It was to the point where you gave up using earphones to focus and let San perfect his technique until it became white noise to your ears. Now, the silence was deafening. Earphones are popped into your ears, putting your music on shuffle. 

[ Manager Bae to Manager Chat ] Bringing the kids home today! You guys want anything on the way back? 

You bring your phone up to your eyes, a frown on your lips as you think of what to reply. 

[ You to Manager Chat ] Sweet Cream Cold Brew and chicken sandwich please? I’m staying in the office for overtime lol

[ Manager Bae to Manager Chat ] Call. 

You look at the time. It’s 9PM. He won’t be back until 10 or 11 depending on the rush. Hell, you realized that it’s been a while since you managed to catch a breather in the office. You could barely keep your focus so you end up looking through your phone, doing the routine clean up for the sake of your phone memory. 

For the sake of your sanity, for once, you don’t push yourself to work at least until your (late) dinner comes in. You decide to call your best friend, in need of an ear that would listen because shit your thoughts are just a jumbled mess now. Her phone rings on and on, until you reach the familiar beep of a call untouched. You try again but you receive the same flat note. You tap the red icon on your phone and opt to send them a message. 

[ You to Jiwoo ] Need to talk to you about some personal stuff. Nothing life threatening, just super stressed. 

You put your phone away and stare at your emails and paperwork. If you can’t write something up, at least you can organize something right? It’s mindless work until Manager Yoon comes back. Jiwoo replies after a while. 

[ Jiwoo to You ] Good that you said it’s not life threatening. I just finished watching a zombie movie. I’m free Sunday night/Monday.

Her life choices barely faze you at this point. 

[ You to Jiwoo ] Smart choice to watch a zombie movie at night. I’ll be free by like… past midnight?

[ Jiwoo to You ] I’ll buy the soju. Bring mixers and some food. 

You break into a fit of giggles at her words. A serious heart-to-heart talk was always capped off with a chill drinking session at her place. 

You continue to organize your files, moving some of the files to a hard drive, especially now that some of these files were for the duration of Inception promotion. As you go through your files, you’re greeted by various selfies from the boys, some expected from twenty something boys, some looking very much boyfriend-dol of them. Most of them coming from Seonghwa and San, though San beating the older by a few more. You remember how the conversations always went; San would always ask which one was better, you always doubted the legitimacy of your decisions as usually the social media staff were in charge of that. He would pester you still for which one was better until you chose something. Now that you look at them with the current situation in hand, things slowly made sense. 

A heavy sigh slips through your tired lips as you watch the bar fill up, waiting for all these documents and photos to be in your hard drive. You know some of these photos were going to be needed for their birthday videos and other special events so it was best to not delete anything. Somehow your need to organize everything overpowers the small part in you that wants to process and understand everything that happened between you and San. 

“I’m back!” Manager Bae declares much to your surprise. You jolt up in your seat, surprised by his sudden presence and you look at the time. 10:15PM. 

“No traffic?” You ask and your eyes trail to the food in his hand. He catches how your eyes look at the bag of food instead of at him to which he laughs, like manager, like idol after all. The older male places your food on your table before he settles down by his space. 

“Surprisingly none,” he starts, while you rummage through the bag for your sandwich first. “The boys fell asleep fast in the car too so things went smoother than expected.” 

“They’ve been constantly on the move since September, haven’t they? It’s bound to catch up to them.” You say before taking a bite. With your free hand, you skim through your documents and emails. “After this round of promotions, they have a show with Kakao plus acting offers already. It’s almost still full speed ahead for them, still. You told the boys of the acting offers already didn’t you?” 

“Yeah, Yunho and Jongho are the most excited for it. Expected since they’re the most vocal about wanting to venture into acting.” You could already picture the looks on their face when their wish came true and it brings a small smile to your face. It’s moments like that that makes you think your work is worth it. A few minutes pass as you get halfway through your sandwich and Manager Bae stands up again, ready to call it a day. “Are you still working overtime?” He asks as he glances at the time. 

You take a sip of your coffee, feeling a little awake from the gradual caffeine fix. “Yeah, probably just two hours more. I just want to finish all of these deals and stuff.” He looks at you with a hint of concern but nods. You were a stubborn one, not wanting to stop when the finish line is so close. 

“Don’t forget you got the car keys for tomorrow’s schedule.” 

That makes you pause to do the math of your travel time plus sleep. You have enough time if you keep to your schedule. With that set, you flash him a reassuring grin. “Duly noted with thanks. Get some sleep already, you’ve been on your feet since early morning.” You say as you wave him goodbye. He laughs at your choice of words but lets it be. With that, you’re alone again. Alone with your thoughts and your work. 

Maybe silence wasn’t the best way to deal with this. 

---------

[ You to Jiwoo ] Fuck it. I’m gonna send you voice notes of everything that has happened. Cause I swear if I don’t get this out of my system, I might just lose it. 

You look at the text you composed for a few moments, you’re in bed now, drying your still damp hair. You remove everything and write everything down in your notes app instead. There were things that were better mulled about first instead of being spoken about recklessly. The blank message box taunts you to say something but you don’t. Instead, you put your phone away and ready yourself for sleep. 

---------

You wake up to your phone buzzing reminding you of the new day. The last you remember of your hazy dream was San. [dream dialogue?] You’re not sure if that was a good dream or not, details fade before you could make more sense of what it was. Regardless, it leaves a bad taste in your mouth about today. 

[ You to ATEEZ ] I’ll wait for you boys at the parking lot. Be there by an hour latest. 

[ Seonghwa to ATEEZ ] frodo_thumbs_up

With his reply, you trust that the rest of them would know of your order. You finally get out of bed, getting ready to start what could be another long day. Once you look presentable, you make sure you have everything you need for the day. As you make your way to the parking lot, you look through your messages, and you feel a little better knowing that all your drafted proposals have been approved and are just waiting for the green light from the partners. This also means you have to give the boys the rundown soon. You sent a message to the manager chat of the updates. 

The doors open and one by one the members enter, causing the van to roar to life-- in this case, not the engine. The sudden influx of noise startles you, nearly dropping your phone in the process. 

“Manager-nim!” whines Wooyoung, who was seated right behind your seat. “Why don’t you pick us up from the dorm anymore?” 

You reach behind you to pat his head, or well whatever you can pat more of. “Wooyoung, you boys are already adults..” You reason lightly, trying to keep your tone light. Unfortunately, your head is anything but light. How exactly do you make sense of a dream where someone who has feelings for you appears in them? Especially a talent. You’ve heard stories, rare that they ended on a good note too. 

Those words bring some sort of feeling in San. A bitterness that not even his performance insecurities could bring. He had his earphones in, not wanting to talk to anyone this early. 

‘San’s not a morning person for the most part, just let him warm up on his own.’ 

Manager Hwang’s voice rings in your head and it’s the only thing that’s trying to reason with your uneasiness. Once you’ve appeased Wooyoung, you count the boys to make sure they’re all accounted for before driving them to the company. 

The car mellows down into quiet murmurs between those who were awake and in between awake and slumber. It felt like everything was back to normal for the most part. 

Things go by like normal, stylists who you haven’t seen due to schedule changes have decided to gush to you over the latest gossip that you missed out on. At least they were nice enough to gossip with you after styling the boys, otherwise that would’ve been a disaster. 

“Yes, so they disregarded their contract and are dating a fan.” The tone gives you an odd impression. 

“You make it sound like this isn’t the first time he’s done it.” You note, frowning at such idea entering your mind. It’s the look on the stylist’s face that tells you you’re correct. 

He sighs. “I’ve worked with them for a number of years, their contract states they’re not supposed to date for at least two years after debut. This boy doesn’t even cover it up while doing his work. I’m not one to shame an idol for dating, I’m worried for those who have to cover up his trail and his members if he gets caught.” 

Your blood runs cold at that. It sounds all too familiar for you. But you don’t show signs of your fear to the stylist, knowing better than to talk about issues of the heart with that at a time like this. That said, you opt to just frown and sigh at such actions. It’s hypocritical of you but you couldn’t get yourself to act any other way. “I hope he gets his act together.” You mumble. 

“Who gets his act together?” 

Everyone jumps at the sudden voice and heads turn to the direction. You stand up immediately after calming your racing heart. “Wooyoung! Don’t scare us like that!” While your tone carries no hint of malice or disappointment, it does carry a tone of someone who is used to his antics. 

Your nagging causes him to snicker. “Sorry for scaring you.” He starts, while giving the other staff members an apologetic bow. “Who were you talking about?” Leave it Wooyoung to sniff out the sauce. 

At his question, you shake your head, flicking his forehead in the process. “Nothing that concerns you, Wooyoung. You’re done with your hair and make up?” You shift the topic to something else, much to the relief of the staff and your heart. 

“Yes~” God, it’s so difficult to stay mad at this boy. You watch him shuffle away to change into his performance clothes then shift your attention to the rest of the boys who were just catching up on a few minutes of sleep while waiting for their call time. 

Today’s stage for them was going to be pre-recorded as they had another guesting at the time the music show will air. You wake up those who were still asleep when they had thirty minutes before their call time. “Guys, get ready. You’re going to be called to perform soon.” You say softly, not wanting to scare them. This somehow gets them on their feet quicker than expected, you look around then you spot the camera pointed at their direction. As a reflex, you immediately cover your face and you’re thankful that San managed to step in front of you, now joking about with Wooyoung as they warm up. You take the chance to slip away from the camera and you watch from a distance as they get ready, right on time for one of the production staff to usher them to the stage as they hand them their microphones. 

Once they bid their goodbye to the camera and make their way off to the sides of the stage, a part of you falls into unease. Seasoned eyes look around the room, trying to spot for anything that the boys may have forgotten. ‘Mingi didn’t forget his gloves, same goes for Wooyoung. Did Seonghwa not wear his choker…?’ You ask yourself questions, all of which were answered as you look around the room and the tables. A part of you wants to assume this is just your brain drifting to that weird dream you had and for once, you hope that this logical side of you is right. 

The monitor in the room has you watching how the boys do their rehearsals, two of which were to get used to the stage difference, the last being for the camera work. Once all that was done, alongside the makeup retouches, they were ready for the final run. It’s not a surprise that the last run was better than the rest, you checked your phone, it would take them roughly ten minutes to get back to the room. 

It’s been a while since they finished and you excuse yourself from the mindless chatter the other staff had busied themselves with. “Get ready to pack up already.” Your voice gentle but still holding authority as you knew of their schedules. Where were the boys? You step out of the room looking for them. It took a few moments until you did find them but they made no move of leaving their spot. Something in you forces you forward and you see one of the production staff members throwing their anger on them. 

“Excuse me, did something happen?” Truth be told, you hate confrontations but this is part of your work. If this argument is stretched any longer, you fear that the boys would be late to their next schedule. 

The staff member’s voice booms, bouncing off the walls, as he decides to lecture you on how to make artists be aware of their own mishaps with logistical matters. While he didn’t call you names, it was evident that his anger was starting to become misdirected. It’s a miracle how you managed to hold your ground amidst the tirade despite the storm brewing behind your eyes. So you smile, bright and easy against the man. “Yes, while I would like us to deal with this now, I have to bring these boys to their next schedule--” He cuts you off with another rant, and your features stiffen. As you were about to open your mouth, you feel someone’s arms block you. A few blinks try to get you back to reality and you look at the arm in between you and the staff. 

Seonghwa. 

Hongjoong and San are trying to appease the staff member. Your mind goes into static, you tell the others to go back to the room to pack everything up. “Meet you by the car. Your next schedule is an hour away. Let’s hope there’s no traffic.” You say and Yunho manages to reign the rest in to do as told. Afterwards, you shift your attention back to the staff and put the two boys behind you. “I’ll cut to the chase. Here’s my contact details.” You bring out your calling card and place it in his hands. “We can arrange damage fees by tonight. I apologize for the hasty end to this discussion but the boys still have promised schedules to fulfill.” You bow out of respect and apology and leave the scene. The three following you close behind. 

You know the three are talking, over what? You aren’t sure. Your mind’s on auto pilot, overwhelmed with everything. The stress has been at an all time high for you but you always push it down, focusing on what’s in front of you. Yet, the staff’s outburst is probably the last thing that’s going to break you. A subtle pinch to your arm and you bring yourself back to reality. You check their dressing room and everyone’s already gone except for the boys who were just about to open the door. “Good, let’s go.” 

---------

The trip to their radio guesting was bustling with confusion towards the angry staff as they try retrace their steps towards that event. You on the other hand, are just grateful for the lack of traffic, you’ll get to the next schedule with a few minutes to spare. Nothing from their discussion enters your ears, too focused into making sure that everyone gets to their destination in one piece. You can deal with your emotions and reactions when the day ends. 

On the other hand, San’s been brooding about what has happened. Seonghwa and Hongjoong ask the members about the broken mic that fortunately lasted until the end of their performance. He didn’t like how things played out there. A lot of things are brewing in his mind, all of which were related to you and Seonghwa. His shortcomings of not responding immediately also being an additional burden. The staff’s outburst stunned everyone and it was Seonghwa who managed to respond first by stepping in between the two of you. As expected of the eldest. Hongjoong and him only snapped out of it after he moved. No wonder, you preferred his hyung.  Something was swirling in his pit and it wasn’t anything good.

Before San could make sense of these conflicting emotions, the car smoothly parks and the doors slide open. “We’re here.” You state and you hop off the car. He blinks out of his thoughts and follows the rest of the boys. They’re greeted by a warmer group of staff who give them a rundown of what’s to happen for this guesting. They’re greeted by lunch sets with their names on it and that was enough to elicit excited chatter from them. When the staff informs them that they’re eating as well in front of the camera as they talk about their album, it gets only louder from there. Even it gets him flashing a genuine smile, they drop their bags off in the room before being ushered to where teh show will be aired. 

You followed the boys and were greeted the same way they were greeted. You talk with some of the staff on the way inside, they hand you your lunch set and you stare at it dumbfounded. “I don’t remember this being part of the fee..” You mumble. The staff catches your words and she beams at you.

“It’s on us! We know you guys have been on your feet for so long, so we figured it would be good to give you guys something to eat.” She explains and it’s another whiplash of emotions in you. Maybe you do need a day off soon. You look at the woman in stunned silence for a moment before bowing out of gratitude. 

As the boys do their thing in front of the cameras, you stay in the room, slowly eating the meal you were gifted with. Your confusing dream must have been a warning of what this day would be. With this hour to yourself, your mind wanders to the gossip earlier: an idol dating behind everyone’s backs, for the lack of a better term. You shared the same sentiments, idols should be able to date whoever they want, but it’s the disregard to their contract and group that stresses you out more. One way or another, it strays towards San’s confession and his avoidance. He’s a man with his heart on his sleeve, and a head more stubborn than a bull. Just who did he think you had an interest on? You were mindlessly picking at your food, before snapping out of it when you remembered that you were eating. It took longer for you to finish your meal, not used to these portions after months of being on the move but you managed. Your phone buzzes and it startles you out of the silence. 

[Jiwoo to You] What time are you free

[Jiwoo to You] need your help on making a statement. 

You stare at the messages in confusion. What is she on? Just as you were about to answer, you hear the claps and the choruses of ‘You did well!’, ‘Thank you for the hard work!’. 

[You to Jiwoo] three hours. 

[You to Jiwoo] what happened?

You keep your phone and clean up after yourself just in time for the boys to enter the room with the same staff member telling them that the meal is free. The director follows them and thanks everyone for the successful shoot, thanking you as well for taking care of the eight boys. The praise catches you off guard and all you could do is laugh softly and thank them for their words and work. 

Everyone could feel the end of the day’s schedule when they hit the road back to the agency. The boys were still in their stage outfits and they wanted nothing but to be in something more comfortable. For once they weren’t fast asleep in the car, they were too busy eating still (is there even a limit to their appetite?). All you could hear was their chewing and occasional excited yelling because of how kind the staff were to provide them with food and just let them talk about their album freely. A part of you smiles as they recount the last schedule. Let them have their fun before they end up talking about that damned mic. You had to admit though, hearing them eat is kind of making you hungry too. 

“We’re here.” You state and everyone’s surprisingly finished with their meals. They’re that hungry? They hop off the car and rustle about to return into their regular clothes. They had to return these clothes to their stylists to prep them for the succeeding weeks of performance. 

Once they’re greeted by their stylists, the environment suddenly booms with energy. Food really does something to these eight boys. It takes a while before you’re greeted by them in their normal clothes again. Their makeup long gone as well. They look like regular twenty something like this. Manager Yoon exits the office, taking the keys from you, the swift work surprising you. 

“Hey!”

“My turn, remember? Hongjoong is staying late tonight..” 

You pout, sometimes being the youngest in a company makes it easy for your seniors to tease you. After his words, you nod. “Alright, just give me the keys when you get back.” You wave the rest of them goodbye, and you look at Hongjoong who’s just leaning against the wall. “Are you going to stay late to work on music?” 

He flashes an apologetic smile. “You need our side of our story too.” 

This was going to be a long day but it had to be addressed. You just hope it would end with enough time to get to talk to Jiwoo. 

The next few hours went by with the two of you trying to clear everything. Hongjoong recounting everything that had to deal with the microphone before the staff’s outburst. He even apologizes for you becoming the victim to those words. 

“Hongjoong, it’s not your fault. You don’t have to apologize for something you didn’t do.” You counter gently. You just wanted your bed, to just retreat from today’s events. You can write up an email to the staff in the morning. 

“It’s still our fault, regardless, that you had to deal with that.” Hongjoong returns, he’s not angry at all. On the contrary, he’s frustrated. Not only does he have to deal with schedules on top of schedules, composing, and San’s emotions, he had to deal with an unnecessary outburst that shouldn’t have been directed at you. 

You just flash him a smile, dropping the topic. “Anyways, I’ll relay this to the staff in the morning. Manager Bae will be in charge of your schedules tomorrow.” You look at the time, only half an hour before Jiwoo calls. “Let’s get going?” 

The ride home is quiet as well, at least the silence isn’t stifling. He busies himself with his phone, looking through anything new that has happened in social media. You look at the clock from time to time, a little bit worried for your friend who would call anytime soon. 

“Are you okay?” Hongjoong asks, his voice snapping you out of your anxious state.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He doesn’t need to deal with your own issues. “Can you keep an eye on my phone? I’m waiting for a call.” You ask just in time for the light to turn green. 

He spots your phone, leaning against the cup holder and puts it on his lap as he goes through his phone. Fifteen minutes in and your phone suddenly vibrates in his hand. He looks at the screen and reads the name out loud. “Jiwoo is calling you..” He says, a little confused if this is the call you were waiting for. 

An annoyed hiss slips from your lips. “Pick it up.” It was inevitable. 

“I’m driving.” You state, asking for a few more minutes. Voice a little louder, to carry over to your phone.

“I’ll be quick, I need your help making a statement.” Her voice rings loud and clear. You look at Hongjoong, he probably put it on speaker. You shoot him a look to keep quiet. 

“On what?”

“Fans found out one of my idols is dating and have been emailing the agency nonstop. I made a draft already and I need your eyes and thoughts to fix any errors.” She says and you rub your temple with your free hand. 

“Send the draft to my email. I’ll get to it in forty five minutes. I’m on my way home.” You state, as you drum your fingers against the steering wheel. “I’m guessing this is what the staff was talking about earlier.” You say though a little softer. 

“You know how word travels fast in this industry.” She returns with a groan. “Call me when you get home, I’ve sent the email already.” 

“Will do, bye.”

She hangs up and you let out the breath you’ve been holding. The silence that hangs over you and Hongjoong is heavy. “Whatever just happened, is between us. If the others find out about it, let them find out about it themselves.” You rarely sound this stern and stressed that all Hongjoong could do is nod. 

Maybe that was why you rejected San. Jiwoo was right, word travels fast in this industry, it’s why he always has to make sure the boys don’t go out of line too much for their sake. He lets them learn from their mistakes but none of them grave enough to affect their name. This one though seemed heavy, especially if fans were emailing the company already. He was going to need to talk to someone though to know how to deal with San should things go out of hand. But how can he when you tell him not to with such a tone? Hell, you don’t even know that he knows that San confessed to you. 

Once you enter the parking lot you unlock the doors. “Get out of the car already, so that once I park the car smooth ride up to our apartments.” You say, a little gentler this time as you seem to have calmed down after such a bombardment of information. He looks at you with raised brows but follows nonetheless. 

By the time you get out of the car, you see Hongjoong waiting for you with the doors already open. An odd weight falls between the two of you as the doors close. 

“Is that why you rejected San?” Hongjoong carefully asks as the elevator slowly goes up. 

Your eyes are shut as you let yourself catch a breather before answering his question. “You know already, huh.” 

“Seonghwa and I kind of figured it out with his sudden mood shifts.” He reasons. “Yunho figured it out too but I doubt the others do yet.” He adds. 

A groan slips from you and you want nothing to just slip down the floor. “Can we talk about this confession thing when your Thanxx promotions end?”

“That’s too far..” He tells you. For once, you can see why the members look up and respect him so much. 

A pause. 

“Fine, Monday. You have no schedules anyways.” This makes him smile a bit. The sooner this is fixed, the better. The conversation is fortunately, cut short when the elevator rings at your floor. “Get some sleep, Hongjoong.” You bid him goodbye as you step out. 

He calls for your name carefully and you stop in your tracks. The lights from the elevator hasn’t closed either so you turn to look at him properly. “Thank you really for everything. You can lean on me or Seonghwa at least, for anything.” 

Something in you softens at those words and you nod. “Yes, sleep well Hongjoong. Manager Bae’s going to be the one in charge of your schedules in the morning and afternoon.” With that he waves you goodbye, the doors closing between the two of you. 

Once you were left alone, your eyes heat up but you shake yourself back to reality. “Still got work.” You remind yourself. 

You don’t know what time you fell asleep, but it’s already noon. “Shit.” You immediately check your laptop if you’ve sent the revised statement to Jiwoo that you worked on. A relieved sigh escapes your lips when you see that you did. You reviewed your emails and see if there’s anything you need to get done. For the first time, you don’t have much to deal with so you check on your social media to see what’s been going on. 

The idol that Jiwoo was stressing over last night is trending. 

You stare at his name for a few moments, deciding if you should check what the noise is about or what the fans have been saying but you think otherwise. Instead, you opt to get ready for what’s left of the day before heading to the agency. 

--------

The boys were on their phones while waiting for their call time. Some of them playing video games while the others look at social media. They see a familiar name on the trending topics and decide to see what’s going on. 

Seonghwa immediately leans to Hongjoong and shows the news to which the latter winces. He looks over at San and he and Wooyoung are also looking at the same post. 

“Should I message him?” Wooyoung asks, he glances over at the older two when he feels their gazes on him. “Did you see the news too?” 

“Yeah. Check on him if you can.” Seonghwa gently urges, worried also for their friend. Truthfully, the rest of the group wasn’t that close to that idol but considering Wooyoung, he’s bound to have some sort of friendship with him. 

San’s busy in his head, mulling over the news. They just resigned. Their friend resigned over being caught in a dating news. His eyebrows are furrowed, deep in thought as he’s just as worried as his friend but he’s worried also for you. For some reason, even when he tries to avoid you, his thoughts still go back to you. How many messages has he composed that he would delete? How many times has he tried to get himself to act normally only to fail and close himself off from you? 

Hongjoong keeps his eye on his two members, clearly with their own problems regarding the news. He knows one will be fine, but the other… it’s hard to say. He looks over at Seonghwa who’s a little bothered by the entire thing as well. “We need to talk to Manager-nim later.” 

“I’ll handle it. Think you can handle San for the time being?” 

“Yep.”

--------

[Jiwoo to You] well fuck, regardless of the statement, they just resigned. 

It takes a moment for you to understand what she was referring to but once you did, you freeze up. It’s like all your biggest fears were coming true, though not for you, it’s right in front of you. 

[You to Jiwoo] drinks this weekend? Your place? 

[Jiwoo to You] call. 

You were going to put your own problems on the back burner for now. This girl probably had to hold so much together thanks to that guy and now things aren’t getting any better until probably months down the line. Too busy in your own thoughts, you accidentally spill water on yourself. “Please.” You murmur to no one in particular as you wrap your jacket around your waist before cleaning up the mess in the kitchen. 

--------

[Seonghwa to You] Are you free later? I think we need to talk about San. 

And here you are thinking you were their manager but then again, the age difference makes it easier for them to see you as their friend after work. You lean against the back rest of your chair. 

[You to Seonghwa] Yeah, free by 6pm. I’ll wait for you. 

Seonghwa shows the reply to Hongjoong and they relax a little. They need to know what you think of San because it was starting to get clearer that you never gave him a definite response to his feelings. 

You stare at your messages, even going as far as reading through your conversations with San which consisted of various topics and banter-- with the occasional fishing for praise from him.

 Why were you so affected by his feelings? 

You spend some time watching some of the videos he has of the members having fun, you could clearly hear his laughter on one of them and it makes you smile a bit, missing that sound a little too much. 

It takes your phone buzzing with another notification to snap you out of your thoughts. “Ah, two more hours.” You note at the time, not really looking forward to your talk. 

[You to Seonghwa] do you want me to get you something to eat as well? Lol

[Seonghwa to You] hehe please?

[You to Seonghwa] lmao, fine. 

Still a kid at heart, really. 

--------

If the food you have on the counter from 7/11 says anything, it’s that you decided to wait for Seonghwa before eating, and that you’re prepared for his appetite. 

[You to Seonghwa] I’m at the office kitchen. 

[You to Seonghwa] I also have meat. 

[Seonghwa to You] ^^*

His reply makes you snort, already picturing his excited grin at the mere mention of meat. It won’t be too long before they arrive at the office. The door opens mere minutes later and while you expected the room to suddenly boom with noise, it was only Seonghwa who entered the room. He catches the look in your eyes and for some reason wanted to tease you about your feelings but now isn’t the right time for that. 

“Relax. Everyone else is just changing and getting ready to head home. I told them I’m staying behind to do some vocal practice.” He knows you well enough to know that you need the complete story when it comes to their schedules. Also because it’s not the complete truth. 

You sigh in relief and gesture for him to sit and eat already. “Let’s talk about it when everyone else is gone.” 

“No one can hear us here. The room next to us is the gym, the room next to the gym is the studio so you’re fine.” 

“Seonghwa.” You say, still a little tense with the mere idea of the boys walking in on your talk. 

“You can’t push this away forever.” He cuts you off, his voice taking on a little bit of strength that surprises the two of you. The look on your eyes makes him look away as he starts to eat. “I’m sorry about the tone but I’m serious. You can’t push this away and think it’ll fix itself.” 

Silence falls on the two of you as you unpack your meal. You let go of the tone slipup, he was right and you doubted this issue could wait for Jiwoo. So while you wait for your respective meals to heat up, you tell Seonghwa what happened: starting from the small things San would do since your first day up until the moment he confessed to you. You admit that you were stumped into who he would think that you would fancy as you have inevitably been stuck to them since their promotions started. 

That’s one thing Seonghwa didn’t expect, sort of. San’s jealousy is something everyone’s familiar with but jealousy in the aspect of romance wasn’t something Seonghwa expected in this situation. It actually makes him forget that his meal is still hot, causing him to slightly burn his tongue from the unexpected temperature spike. At the sight of his blunder, you hand him a glass of water to which he refuses as he struggles to chew the hot piece of beef. You decide to just watch his struggle as you sit there and eat your food. 

Once he succeeds, he takes a few sips of water. His eyes clearly watery from the pain. “Are you okay or do you need a moment?” You ask him, trying to hide the fact that you were amused by his struggle to regain his composure. He finishes what’s left of his water before he turns his attention to you. 

“Did you ever tell him your answer to his confession?” He asks you and it’s the way your shoulders drop that tell you that how you answered or lack thereof is the reason why San is the way he is. “You didn’t tell him that you like him too?” 

Now’s your turn to choke on your food. You stare at him incredulously as you try to regain some sort of control with your food mishap. “W-wait..” you sputter out as you try to catch your breath. It takes some time before you’re able to breathe normally and eat. “I never said anything about me liking him?” 

“You never told him?” 

“How do you even react to someone who tells you they like you while nearly about to fall asleep while standing?” 

“I don’t know…” he trails off, gathering the right words in his head, just as he was about to continue, the door swinging open causes the two of you to stop. 

“Didn’t know you guys were still here.” To be honest, you didn’t think San would be in the studio either. 

“San-ah, I thought you went home with the rest of the boys already.” Seonghwa says, straightening up as he sets his food down. The younger catches how his hyung’s eyes flit to you then to him. 

The younger steps inside the kitchen, refilling his water bottle. “I didn’t. I wanted to squeeze in a workout. I thought you left already.” He returns. All you want to do right now is leave the room. He turns to the two of you once his bottle was filled and it’s unnerving to see his eyes look so steely. 

“I was going to leave later but we can go home now.” Seonghwa returns calmly. His eyes return to you trying to look as if he was asking if they can go home. You knew better, the talk was going to happen some other time. With that look, you quickly finish your meal, then packing up the trash. 

“Sure. Let’s go home.” 

---------

The ride home wasn’t any better: both of them busy with their phones, both sitting at different sides of the car. At least you had full control of the radio. 

Now in San’s eyes, he wonders why Seonghwa would’ve said he was going to do some vocal practice when he was eating dinner with you in the kitchen. He didn’t think of his hyung as someone who would lie. He’s better than that isn’t he? The younger does feel a sense of annoyance though, that he would say such only to go behind their backs and eat with you. He’s trying hard not to think of the worse of his hyung knowing well that he’s the better option between the two of you, but with the recent news of their friend resigning due to dating along with his feelings for you? It’s a challenge. He shuts his eyes and takes a deep breath, doing his best to calm himself down. 

“San-ah, your shoulders are tense.” The older’s soft voice calls him out of his thoughts and it effectively gets him to drop his shoulders. Seonghwa looks at the other for a moment then returns his gaze to his phone. He worries of what goes on in his head especially after seeing the two of you in the kitchen. He genuinely didn’t think that San would stay late especially during promotional periods. He worries that he may have made it worse for everyone, especially him and you. 

“We’re here.” Your voice makes the two raise their heads from their screens. The cold lighting of the parking lot telling them that they are home. You hop out of the car first, waiting for them to get out while making sure you got everything with you. Seonghwa goes ahead, hoping that the talk (or whatever was talked about) makes you move. 

San does it for you though. “So I guess I got my answer?” He pipes up, lingering around you. His gaze beyond you but at his hyung who’s waiting for the lift. Your confused look makes him hiss in frustration. His reaction makes you snap, too tired from all the mental gymnastics you do, too tired from bringing them from point A to point B day in and day out, too tired from keeping yourself together for their sake, for your friend’s sake and for yourself. 

“San, how sure are you about it? All of it? You’re confusing my care for something else. Everyone is worried about you, I have to worry about you as well and while I am your friend, I’m still your manager. At the end of the day, my job is to make sure you guys are able to do your job as artists.” Your blood runs cold at how those words rush out of you, you could barely look at him. The only thing you can hear is your heartbeat and the car’s security lock. “San, how sure are you about my feelings? How are you filling in the blanks that I should be filling?” 

Those words make his feet move, leaving you in the dirt as he walks over to where Seonghwa is. For a moment, you feared that he would get physical-- boy has a black belt after all. He doesn’t. He just lingers by the back, waiting for the lift. He should’ve done a more strenuous workout just so his mind would stop running. 

Seeing him look like so makes you sigh. You had to admit your faults on that, you’re just so tired. You promised your day off would be after promotions but you kind of wish you could make it earlier and have it this week. By the time you arrive at where the two are, the doors of the elevator opens letting the three of you in. You don’t press your floor number first, letting the boys get their rest first. You’re getting additional hours of sleep today anyways. 

“Good night.” You mutter as the two of them step out of the elevator. Seonghwa returns the greeting and so does San. Though one looks back and gives you a friendly wave, the other stalks off, shoulders just as tensed as it was earlier. You look at Seonghwa and shake your head. That’s all he needed to know as to how the mere moments he was out of earshot went. 

“Joong and I will deal with him. Get some rest and think it through. We still need to talk again.” 

“Yeah.” You just hope you didn’t fuck it up for everyone. Something in your gut told you otherwise. 

Part 5

[woogurl]

so i decided to make a short analysis and i say short because i don’t know how short it’ll be. 

this is in regards to the anon who said that kq seems to push woosan too much in choreos/taking pics together/high fives/etc.

don’t get me wrong, i’m not here to prove to you that these moments aren’t fanservice because as i mentioned before, that they often are. however, i do not think kq is always responsible for all these moments. i think they have many subtle moments that make me think otherwise. 

i know when we think of fanservice moments, there’s no doubt that fake love

and this legendary, sensational ass performance tops them all.

now before we rid these moments as just fanservice, can we talk about how comfortable they are with doing this kind of stuff. yeh many group ships do fanservice, but understand that MOST do not go this far. Nor do they commit to this degree. even with korea’s culture, there are just some boundaries most of these men do not want to cross. let’s talk about a fanservice moment with nct, and use mark and johnny as an example. there’s a moment where they get very close and intimate during superhuman but they always seem very uncomfortable. at least mark does. he simply does not seem to like this type of intimacy with males. and that’s completely fine.  

i also want to use nct as a whole as an example there’s many times where the company tries to get them to do fanservice but to no avail. they just laugh and joke around, and that’s because they see each other as brothers. i’m not referring to any specific ships. i simply mean in general. so the company makes them do fanservice but they’re not forced to “enjoy it or do it often”.

now let’s take a very intimate taejin moment didn’t want to do a popular ship for obvious reasons. sorry taejin shippers. 

the intensity is there on tae’s side, but not jin. it just seems like he’s doing his job and giving the fans a bit of fanservice. there’s also a more intense taejin moment where there seems to be a lot of sexual tension, but i’m not convinced that there is because they’re obviously doing it for the camera. they’re both good actors so. i’m sure they could convince anyone that they have incredible chemistry and sexual tension.

but let’s be real, it’s not convincing when it’s obvious that they’re just giving their fans a show. so i can understand why people are like woosan are doing it for show. esp because unlike any other ship there’s so many woosan moments in their choreos and they just dance together so often. and i’m gonna assume the anon brought this up because there’s woosan moments in their newest song inception and fever. LET’S NOT EVEN MENTION THE LYRICS. now ateez is one of those groups who does a lot of fanservice in choreo’s in general, but they def use woosan to their advantage. why? because it’s such a popular ship, but so is seongjoong as i mentioned before. they could capitalize on seongjoong as well, but their moments are often less organic when they do do fanservice. like i said they don’t pretend to enjoy it. hongjoong is very open about his disgust with skinship. so no i don’t think kq forces woosan to pretend to enjoy it. i think they just genuinely enjoy the fanservice.

so let’s take some subtle moments during woosan choreo’s.  

now, this iconic moment was during random play dance in budapest and it isn’t actually apart of any choreo, but mind you seonghwa and mingi were supposed to do a couple dance as punishment. but was like fuck fanservice. well they did give us a different type of fanservice hip thrusts. while woosan was basically like...

can u see the difference in atmosphere, like woosan didn’t have to do anything but they started dancing as if they were really at a club. san was literally eye-fucking woo and biting his lips and shit like damn. lmfao.

woo of course was like okay, that’s enough and pointed to mingi and seonghwa, u prob can’t see because it’s hard to capture but if u watch the vid u’d see woo was like. “ok, das enough, pay attention to mingi and seonghwa”. san was really feeling it tho. enfen.

next moment was during the expedition tour in lisbon. they were doing a random play dance. 

first of all i didn’t even know this moment existed. someone pointed it out in a dm. @ 1:48 there was a lot of tension between woo and san. it was just a random moment during the play dance. the way they looked at each other and san flicked woo’s chin. oomph. HONGJOONG WAS NOT HAVING IT and quickly intervened. san was lowkey mad at hj. 

in the end, woosan ended back up together, despite being separated. 

anyway next moment during Random Dance in Milan (Magazzini Generali). they were dancing to monsta x shoot out and woo wanted him and san to do it together. so he went the opposite way of everyone else.

at this point woo and san were trying to find a way to properly interact with each other but it was so messy because everything was unplanned. they were so attentive to each other that when jongho came and asked them to do the second verse(?) move they just ignored the poor baby. ‘cause they obv had other plans.

jongho ended up doing it by himself while woosan continued with their own plans. ooOOP.

woo wanted to do another song with san, and i guess he wanted them to do the same thing i’m not sure, but san looked just as confused as well. but he did his best in doing what i guess he figured woo wanted him to do. he was up for it tho, he was like what is it? i’ll do it. xD. i know some of y’all are like btch get a youtube channel so we could see the moments better. but idk how to do utubesokey;c

woo ended up getting shy and embarrassed for some reason and san was quick to comfort him. it was super sweet.

next moment is the Random Play Dance in Berlin. Where they were both shyly dancing to twice. They didn’t know what to do, or at least was too shy to do it so san just grabbed woo and started dancing with him. It was another cute moment.

the entire time they were just planning on what they should do together, and san literally waited on woo to see what he wanted to do because woo often takes initiative in general between the two of them. they would just constantly keep touching each other and looking at each other. he was so attentive to woo that he wasn’t paying attention to yunho and seonghwa dancing so jongho and woo both had to point at them so san would turn his attention there. lol. 

san’s attention was still mostly on woo because he grabbed him to dance with. what i’ve noticed during these random play dance moments during tour is that they absolutely love interacting with each other, touching and keeping their attention on each other. it would be foolish to think they’re forced to act that way 24/7 because of kq. they react this way because they’re naturally close to each other and are okay with psychically being close to one another.

next moment is the Random Play Dance in Atlanta. 

yes, it does include the famous fake love woosan dance, but i still think it’s valid because as i’ve said before they’re incredibly comfortable with these types of interactions. also would like to mention how attentive san is to woo once again. for the most part his attention is mainly on woo if you pay attention to him closely.

next the Warsaw ATEEZ My Way SAN focus, san was incredibly attentive to wooyoung. san locks eyes with woo multiple times. i’m just gonna highlight obv moments.

0:45

2:12

NEXT. let met just say 181118 was a glorious fansign. 

Pirate King SAN focus the moment at 1:36 during pirate king where san was like, 'c'mere' to woo.

the moment at 2:22-24 where he was trying to get woo's attention but woo's focus was elsewhere.

the moment at 2:26 he really wanted woo's attention. crjkc j fjmk. that tongue tho mingi.

he then decides to use seonghwa to make woo jealous at 2:39.

he tried to get his attention again at 2:56.

let's talk about the my way cam too, that was full of subtle woosan as well.

not subtle, but still includes moments that isn't part of the org choreo.

once again san is so attentive to woo. if i haven't said this before san is so much more transparent than woo. and u can see that during these moments especially.

san all up in my man's space. sxdrcfgvbjkl 

san being relatable. He's so focused on woo that the members have to push him to the correct spot.

anywaY the point is they enjoy these kind of things  because they’re naturally close and intimate irl. so it makes their interactions looks completely natural and organic. so u don’t have to worry about them being ‘forced’ to do fanservice. ‘cause what woosan has is just something u can’t compare to another ship.

[jacksvnshine]

Stray Kids Rising and Midheavens | My Guesses

I haven’t made a post in a while and Stray Kids stole my heart at the beginning of 2019, making this a cute way to celebrate my first year with the boys~

Disclaimer: These are not confirmed and purely my own theory and opinion. Feel free to share your own guesses and opinions with me; I’d love to get a discussion going!

Chan | Sagittarius Rising | Virgo Midheaven

Sagittarius Risings are adored for their bright demeanor, their wide smiles and infectious laughter. With an athletic frame to match also, I feel Chan fits this rising sign best. He always tries to maintain an optimistic attitude and sees it as his duty to spread cheer and relief to everyone around him. His Sun and Moon could also be possibly placed in his 11th House then, further showing his altruism and selflessness towards both loved ones and strangers as he sees the world, on a whole, as his community. A Virgo Midheaven would make his priority in his career to be to help others. Chan is always trying to spread positive and empathetic messages through his music and vlives and is incredibly honest about dark topics that a lot of idols shy away from. He is incredibly kind and selfless, working himself tirelessly to help his fellow members and his fans. The combination of sunny and energetic demeanor with a hardworking ethic and kind heart for everyone around him has me believe Chan to be a Sagittarius Rising and Virgo Midheaven and we truly don’t deserve this sweetheart.

Alternative Guess: Capricorn Rising

Minho | Gemini Rising | Pisces Midheaven

This boy is such a tease so it can be easy to place him as a Scorpio Rising, especially with all his Scorpio personal placements. However, I felt his unpredictable nature fit Gemini more. One minute, he’s chatty and joking along and then completely shuts up the next. Air risings are also mistaken for flirting when often it is just their sense of humor, and Minho is the master of teasing and creating tension only to laugh right in your face when you actually get flustered. Gemini Risings are associated with having more narrow or dainty features due to Mercury influence, and Minho is a very pretty boy whose features are less intimidating but rather delicate (his hands are almost as small as Felix but everyone seems to forget that lol). Gemini Risings have a sense of mischief to them, with innocent smiles that look as though they’re plotting their next prank. Not the sultry smirk, but the naughty child’s grin. A Pisces Midheaven may pursue careers in the arts and they often have a natural flair for creativity, being able to tune into their imagination and sensitivity to the world around them. They are talented artists and musicians and we all know how great of a dancer Minho is!

Alternative Guess: Scorpio Rising

Changbin | Scorpio Rising | Leo Midheaven

Changbin’s deadpan neutral expression and intimidating presence has me convinced he’s a Scorpio Rising. Each Scorpio Rising I know has deep, intense eyes and strong bone structures with prominent jaws and chins, which we all know is one of the things that his members like to tease relentlessly. They’re always shrouding themselves in dark clothing too; “I love dark”. His Mars and even Pluto could be placed in the 1st House also, adding to his scary yet sexy image. He’s the kind of person that leaves an impression on others, usually one of intimidation or superiority and it has been noted by the members that he stood out particularly in training for his intensity and dedication. Mars in the 1st can also indicate someone who is athletic and this little fluffer right here cannot get enough of himself and his muscles (I hate him and he’s my bias ffs). Mars in the 1st can also indicate someone who tends to get injured often as they are rough or careless with themselves, and Changbin is too clumsy for his own safety sometimes. A Leo Midheaven would have him pursue creative or entertainment careers and I think that one is self-explanatory! It also shows that he has a confident and amicable public image, making him popular with his peers and desired by those outside his social circle, which we can see in his friendships with other idols such as Wooyoung from Ateez. He wants to be a leader or role model to others, to set a good example and constantly push himself to become even better. Essentially, a born entertainer who seems to flourish most in the spotlight.

Alternative Guess: Aries Rising

Hyunjin | Pisces Rising | Sagittarius Midheaven

Though he’s known for being just a little bit overdramatic, I believe Hyunjin could be a Pisces Rising with his Pisces Sun in his 1st House and Mercury and Venus conjunct the Ascendant. This would explain his dreamy visuals and animated expressions that we all love dearly. Pisces risings always have an ethereal beauty to them, with their eyes noted for being especially captivating. Stares so intense but not in the same way as a Scorpio, no, Pisces risings look as though they’re lost inside their daydreams. Maybe its just me but Hyunjin almost looks sleepy sometimes, as though he is hypnotised by something. He has a grace to him, beautiful without even having to try, and that Venus conjunction alongside Pisces would only make this stronger. A Pisces rising is sometimes labelled shy but I believe that if his Sun were placed here too, it would explain his confidence and bubbly nature. Hyunjin’s giggles are addictive and a Mercury conjunction would make for someone much like a Gemini rising in that they can be lively and expressive, which he also seems to have no problem doing too with his inability to hide his excitement or disgust at anything, which we love him for.

Alternative Guess: Leo Rising

Jisung | Leo Rising | Gemini Midheaven

This boy stumped me as I was deciding between Leo or Aquarius. I settled on a Leo Rising thus an Aquarius Descendant. I felt this suited Jisung as he is labelled as one of the most extra members who if you can’t see, you can definitely hear singing in the background. Needless to say, this boy can be very loud and lively yet insecure and unsure of himself also, needing validation from others as he puts on a show to entertain everyone (note: skz pls give him the reactions he wants T-T). I also think that his Moon could then fall into his 8th House, and despite how bubbly Jisung is, he does have his moments where he lets his guard down and we see how much he has been holding back emotionally. Only recently he opened up about his distress with crowds but there have been other moments where he has revealed personal worries, such as the time he discussed his experience with depression and how he uses it to try transform himself for the better and now he can appreciate the small things in life more. I also think that due to interceptions and duplications, Jisung could have a Gemini Midheaven, which further explains his flexibility and adaptability to take on any role required. Main rapping? Check. Dancing center? Check. Hit that high note beautifully? Check. Gemini/Mercury are both also associated with communication and therefore careers involving writing can be popular for them; Jisung is involved in the writing and production process of all of Stray Kid’s songs and has become more confident in his abilities over time. With Gemini’s nervous and hyperactive mind too, it can explain why this little cutie can get so caught up in his head that he ends up forgetting his own lyrics and choreo sometimes!

Alternative Guess: Aquarius Rising

Felix | Cancer Rising | Aries Midheaven

Felix screams ‘big babyboy energy’ to me. His squishy cheeks, tiny hands and plump, pretty lips? CANCER RISING. Seriously, he’s so pretty and it makes me want to cry. His childlike demeanor and touchy nature show how soft he is, coining him the cuddly koala of Stray Kids. Despite his playful nature, he is also very sentimental and the members have even called him the most serious member, showing that he carries a sense of care and sincerity to everything he does. He’s been noted by the members for being extremely thoughtful of those around him, giving lots of gifts and spreading love and warmth as the sunshine of the group. In this sense, Felix is simultaneously a caretaker and child. He is full of passion and enthusiasm, always throwing himself into everything with a fighting spirit. Once settled on his goals, he goes after them with everything he’s got, even if the odds seem against him. To move abroad to pursue music when not even speaking the language might even seem impulsive to others, which is key to any Aries placement. His Aries Moon in the 9th or 10th House could also make him keen to explore and be very headstrong in his decisions. He tries to be optimistic and places a lot of his happiness on his success and growth from where he started, and with how far he has come, he should be so, so, so proud of himself today.

Alternative Guess: Libra Rising

Seungmin | Capricorn Rising | Libra Midheaven

I honestly think Seungmin is one of the most mature looking members, especially for being the second youngest of the group. He has very handsome features and has been known to resemble many of his seniors, including my bias Wonpil from Day6. Capricorn risings tend to be self-conscious and may mask their insecurities with humor usually of the deadpan or ‘savage’ kind - rip Changbin. They’re constantly pushing themselves to improve and will do with the strength and determination few can match. Seungmin has already achieved so much in his short career (e.g. picking up a new language in just three months and co-hosting a show through it) and yet he forever remains humble about all his hard work. His patience is unmatched too and no matter how excited he gets, he still knows when to be serious and put his head down. He doesn’t see the point in talking in circles when you could be getting the job done. When you compare him to the rest of his members, he is honestly one of the most mature and he really deserves more recognition for his strength and talents because he’s terribly underappreciated. A Capricorn rising is their own biggest critic so please show him more love.

Alternative Guess: Virgo Rising

Jeongin | Libra Rising | Cancer Midheaven

Maknae’s tend to get away with a lot of things, but Jeongin just has this extra charm to him that makes everyone whipped for him. This angel can do no harm, surely? rip Changbin once again. Libra risings are natural beauties noted for their symmetrical features, and Jeongin has such lovely and balanced proportions that I can’t help but be envious of. Libra risings are smart in social situations and can navigate conversation with ease, often sweet-talking others to bend to their will which Jeongin has no problem doing with his hyungs. No matter how cunning they can be, they hold an aura of innocence that you find it hard to fault them for anything really! Jeongin has been described as the member most likely to make you smile, and Libra risings aim to please everyone around them. Harmony is key and they get very upset at any kind of conflict, hating the thought of picking sides. Jeongin is very much a team player and has a different type of bond with every member, each relationship unique in their own ways. They can attract more dominant people into their lives (Aries Descendant) and the person that comes to mind first is Chan, who seems to have a particular soft spot for his little brother. Just another things to note is that male Libra risings can have feminine features or mannerisms or appreciate more traditionally Venusian aesthetics, and Jeongin has stated on multiple occassions that his favourite colour is pink! He even goes so far as to saying that its ‘a boy’s colour’ and he always looks so beautiful and himself when wearing it.

Alternative Guess: Capricorn Rising

[mostlycompetentwriter]

Treasure- Part 4

M/F Pairing: Y/N x Kim Hongjoong (Ateez)

Genre: Fantasy AU, Pirate AU

Word Count: 3.5K

Warnings: Smut at the end, language throughout

Tag List:  @ pastel-crystals @ purpleprincesslea @ x-lilyofthevalley-x @ baekxhwa @ bootysand @ suju-hit-me-like-a-wreckingball @ yunderfullthings @ dreamshopesforward @ kiara-reighns @ fivesecondsofsarang @ speedilyunadulteratedcandy @ sansugar @ xxhzxqhxx @ erica-kay @ teeztheflag

Despite his promise, Hongjoong never demonstrated more than a comfortable camaraderie whenever he requested my time. I was always expecting the command to which I would willingly obey, but the Pirate Captain usually offered me a quiet dinner with surprisingly civil conversation. He often asked about my life back on the island, posture relaxed while he listened to me speak. It was a surprising shift in character considering Hongjoong’s initial attitude when I was brought on board. Now, he treated me less like a prisoner and more of a possession to be treated with care. 

As for the rest of the crew, I enjoyed a symbiotic relationship with the other pirates. In the mornings, Yunho would always prepare breakfast, ensuring that I was fed before his members. When the sun was at its highest point, I sometimes assisted San and Wooyoung with their chores down below the main deck. And at night, I envied the mysterious Yeosang who kept watch from atop the crow’s nest for potential threats. On occasion, the younger boy would allow me to join him up there amongst the stars, looking out over the ocean and listening to the splash of the water against the hull. 

At other times, the crew gathered together in the evenings to play a rather unique card game. On the first night, I had watched them from afar, learning through observation how to play the correct hand. Because there was a certain science to the game that involved a lot of wits and careful planning. It was also important to keep a close eye on San and Wooyoung who were more than willing to cheat their way to victory. When I finally felt confident enough to join them for the very first time, I sat in the middle of the troublesome boys and joined the chaos that was becoming a very competitive gambling tournament.

I had also become well-acquainted with the other crew members on Hongjoong’s precious ship, like the brilliant Jongho who demonstrated on more than one occasion his uncanny strength. There was also Park Seonghwa who was in charge of navigation. He liked to find the strangest places to unfold his maps, charting our next course with precision. I admired his careful organization, keeping attention to detail as he explained his work to me with a passionate tone. And I was almost positive that he was a certified genius.

Finally, there was Mingi, the older pirate who still regarded me with an air of contempt. It was obvious that he didn’t like me very much, but I think he tolerated my presence since the Captain still allowed me onboard. Because that was the one thing that all these interesting characters had in common, their profound loyalty to the baffling Pirate Captain who had proven to be nothing like I initially believed.

In the end, everything always came back to Hongjoong who I had slowly started to feel comfortable around. He was deeply affectionate with his crew members, and I was starting to become a recipient of his caring nature. It certainly made life more tolerable on the ship, especially when it was obvious that I had earned their respect.

Currently, our crew was set to sail for the fabled British waters. Hongjoong intended to keep his promise to the Pirate Lords and lead a series of attacks against the naval vessels. He wanted to set an example, hoping to demonstrate his power in an effort to dissuade future Commodores from attacking innocent Pirate crews.

We had been sailing for almost a week without reprieve and I was starting to feel the effects of being away from land for so long. I never complained because I felt like I had no reason to voice my discomfort when Hongjoong never forced me to work like the others. But it was becoming increasingly difficult to sit still throughout the day and watch everyone else move about the ship while I had nothing substantial to do for fun. 

This is why I decided to create my own special version of the card game, twisting the rules of what the rest of the crew had already established. Thus, I settled against the side of the deck that morning, organizing a blank set of cards that I had procured from Yeosang who always possessed the most interesting objects. Hongjoong found me later that day in this predicament, resting in the shadows as I shuffled through a deck of cards. “It’s not a game to play alone,” the Captain greeted me.

“I’m trying something new,” I told him in return.

“New?” he chuckled, leaning against the banister. “I’m impressed.”

“Just wait,” I grinned. “I want to try it tonight with the other guys. I think it’ll keep San and Wooyoung from trying anything nefarious.”

“Obviously you don’t know them very well,” Hongjoong said. “They always find a way to break the rules.”

“We’ll see about that,” I said determinedly. “Was there something you needed?”

“A request,” he replied. “If you’ll accept?”

“I guess it depends on what you want,” I said.

“Just your time,” Hongjoong said. “Tonight in my cabin.”

“Oh?” was all I said in return, remembering the last time I had visited Hongjoong’s cabin, expecting him to act on his promise from a month ago. Instead, the Captain had me sit on his bed while he busied himself with Seonghwa’s maps, occasionally asking for my opinion on a particular route. I was surprised that he wanted my input but entertained his questions until he quietly dismissed me without another word.

“We might reach British waters as early as tomorrow evening,” Hongjoong said.

“Really?”

He nodded. “Don’t think less of me, love. There are difficult decisions ahead of us.”

His words confused me, but I knew it was impossible to figure out Hongjoong’s intentions. “When should I come?”

“Midnight,” he said, sparing me a quick, fleeting glance before he returned to the helm.

“Hello, boys,” I grinned, shuffling through the stack of cards in my hands while observing their current game. 

“What do you want?” Mingi grumbled, barely paying me any attention while shoving a cigarette between his teeth.

“I have something fun for us,” I said. “A new game I made.”

“A new game!” Wooyoung perked up, disregarding the favorable selection of cards in hand to look at me with wide eyes. “What is it?”

“Something I spent all afternoon working on,” I said, dropping the cards onto the edge of the table. “We should play this instead.”

“No thanks,” Mingi said, rolling his eyes while he attempted to return Wooyoung’s attention to their game.

“It might be interesting,” San spoke up, abandoning his cards to retreat around the table, standing over me with his chin tucked on my shoulder. 

“Thank you, Sannie,” I grinned, grateful that the younger boy had always been there to lend me his support since I first stepped aboard the ship. When he wasn’t causing all sorts of mischief with Wooyoung, San was a pretty remarkable person who was incredibly intuitive. 

“I want to try Y/N’s game,” Wooyoung said, leaning against Yunho for support. “Please?”

Despite his tough appearance, Yunho was actually warm-hearted and he held a soft spot for Wooyoung. “I don’t mind,” he said.

“Whatever,” Mingi grunted, kicking back his stool with more attitude than necessary. He glared at me as he passed by before disappearing below the deck with a muttered curse. Meanwhile, Wooyoung and Yunho were already clearing the table of the discarded bottles of alcohol while Seonghwa politely sorted through everyone’s cards.

“Okay,” I said, sliding into Mingi’s abandoned seat. “The rules are simple.”

In actuality, I did my best to make the game as convoluted as possible. Because it left no room for Wooyoung and San’s cheating if they could barely grasp the concept of our card game. Plus, I was still determined to challenge Park Seonghwa who was far too smart for his own good. 

For the most part, the game was very similar to the cards the boys had taught me when I had been first welcomed. Back then, I often sat next to Yunho or Jongho and allowed them to talk me through every move and careful decision. I learned rather quickly and started playing on my own, even though it was often difficult to emerge victorious when it came to Wooyoung and San. Still, it was nice to feel like they wanted me around with the exception of Mingi who continued to insist on ignoring me whenever I happened to come around.

“What do the dice have to do with anything?” Wooyoung asked now, obviously quite irritated as he struggled to understand the rules.

“It depends on the card you draw,” I explained. “Certain cards allow you the opportunity to roll the dice.”

“Oh, whatever,” San huffed. “Let’s just play.”

“No problem,” I agreed, shuffling the cards before distributing seven to each player who had joined our small circle while the other crew members lingered in the background.

I held up my stack, passing my eyes across each card. “I’ll start with this,” I said, turning over one of my cards.

Wooyoung studied my card with intense scrutiny. “Okay, I’ll put this down,” he said, somewhat hesitant in his movements. 

After everyone played their first card, I carefully explained how betting would work during each round. “Two chips each,” I said.

“How do you come up with that?” San asked, clearly perplexed as he watched me slide two of my tokens into the center pile.

“I told you at the beginning,” I said, laughing at the look of utter confusion on his face.

I waited for each player to select a new card. “Does anybody have something that can complete a hand?”

“Me!” Yunho yelled, swiping a golden-tinted card from his stack. “An automatic completion.”

“No fair!” Wooyoung protested, watching Yunho drag the pile of chips in his direction.

“I don’t see a problem,” Yunho quipped in return. “Who draws next?”

“Me,” San quickly interceded, reaching for a card from the shrinking deck at the center of our table. “What the hell does the horse mean again?” 

“Take another two cards,” Seonghwa replied, an intense look of concentration sharpening his features. 

“My turn!” Wooyoung grinned, but I knocked his hand away before he could take a new selection. 

“We have to wait for San.”

“This is so confusing,” Wooyoung whined, slamming his cards down against the table with a pout.

Meanwhile, San examined his cards with narrowed eyes. “Four of a kind,” he grinned, presenting the cards in overdramatic fashion. “I get to roll the dice now!”

“Let me check,” Wooyoung insisted, snatching San’s cards away with a heavy sigh. Meanwhile, San was already throwing the dice across the table.

“Six!” he said, holding out an expectant hand. “Pay up, assholes.”

With a grimace, Seonghwa reluctantly pushed his chips in San’s direction. “This game makes absolutely no sense.”

“Of course it does,” I said. “I spent all afternoon working on this.”

“Well, you didn’t do a very good job,” Wooyoung muttered.

“You’ve been complaining all night,” I said while observing my remaining cards. “Nobody forced you to play.” 

“Yeah? But there’s nothing better to do,” he complained. “You’re gonna win anyway because you actually understand what’s going on.”

“Really?” I smirked. “Since you can’t cheat now!”

“I never cheat,” he lied smoothly. “Sometimes, I try and help my situation.”

“By cheating,” Yunho said, shuffling through his cards as he tried desperately to find what he was looking for. “Fine, I don’t have the stupid Dragon so Seongwha wins.”

The ship’s navigator grinned triumphantly while dragging Yunho’s chips into his rapidly accumulating pile. “It looks like Seonghwa understands.”

“But he’s a genius so it doesn’t count,” Wooyoung said.

“Are you saying that you want to give up?” I challenged the younger, but Wooyoung was never one to turn away from an obvious taunt.

“I’ll figure it out,” he insisted, even as his chip pile continued to grow lower and lower with each subsequent round of play.

Eventually, despite Wooyoung’s best efforts, it came down between me and Seonghwa and I was suddenly more determined than ever to win. “My heart completes the hand,” I said, exposing the card so that he could clearly observe my victory before reaching for the pile of chips. 

“But I draw first,” Seonghwa said, eyeing his new card with interest.

I frowned. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” he chuckled, tucking it away before adding an extra chip to our new betting pile.

But I knew Seonghwa better than that at this point in time. And I was on edge the longer we continued to exchange cards and chips, waiting for the finishing blow. “I have money on you Seonghwa,” San said, growing impatient as he started to pace back and forth.

“I hope it wasn’t a lot,” I said, finally securing the card I had been waiting for, playing it shamelessly as I sat back in my chair with a smirk. “I win.”

Seonghwa was silent for a moment, fingering the edges of the familiar card he had previously drawn. However, he eventually released a dramatic sigh, returning his cards to the pile before pushing his chips across the table. “Congratulations, Y/N.”

Wooyoung squealed from behind me. “That’s the first time Seonghwa has ever lost!”

I felt a warm pride settle in the center of my chest as I counted the chips in front of me. “He can’t be good at everything.”

“I guess I’m not,” Seonghwa said, offering me a quick wink before giving up his chair to an eager crew member who was demanding that we play a new game. I was quick to acquiesce, grabbing the cards to start shuffling while watching Seonghwa from the corner of my eyes. He was talking to Yunho, smiling brightly despite his recent loss, which confused me because I didn’t think Seonghwa would take to losing so generously...And I couldn’t help but think that Seonghwa had let me win on purpose.

I knocked on Hongjoong’s cabin door at midnight, prompt as usual since the Captain emphasized organization and timeliness to the rest of his crew. However, I couldn’t help but wonder if he would be willing to make an exception for me. After all, Hongjoong rarely raised his voice around me anymore, even if I did something mischievous like raid Yunho’s store of chocolate with Wooyoung.

“Come inside,” Hongjoong said when he answered my call, taking a step back to allow me enough room to slip in through the doorway.

“You know, this is rather late even for someone like you,” I remarked, admiring the display of candles on the mantle.

“Yes, but the crew are asleep,” Hongjoong said. “We’ll have privacy.”

I arched a brow at him. “Is there something you want, Captain, that necessitates privacy?”

He smirked knowingly. “I just want a promise from you this time, love.”

“A promise from me?” I repeated. 

“Yes,” Hongjoong nodded. “It might not make any sense now, but it’s important to me that you keep your word.”

“Of course I will,” I affirmed, even if I wanted to point out the hypocrisy behind Hongjoong’s words.

“There might be a moment when you feel like I’ve treated you unfairly,” Hongjoong began, and his serious tone suddenly seemed out of place. “I want you to know that I would never do anything to hurt you. Even if it might seem like I did, you have to remember this moment.”

I simply stared at the Captain. “What’s going on?”

Hongjoong sighed like the entire weight of the world rested solely on his shoulders. “There’s nothing for you to worry about.”

“It doesn’t seem that way,” I said, watching him sit down at his desk. “I’m worried.”

“Don’t be,” Hongjoong said, grabbing a pen from its ink container. “My intentions for you, love, always take into account your well-being.”

It didn’t seem that way to me, especially since Hongjoong seemed burdened by everything he was saying. “You seem sad,” I observed, reaching out to curl my fingers into the fabric of his jacket. “Have I done something wrong?”

Hongjoong chuckled. “If anything, love, you’ve been too perfect.”

I shifted backward, watching as he removed the jacket to reveal a thin cotton shirt underneath. “Is that the only reason you asked me to come here?”

“Not exactly,” he said, turning his head to the side as if to make sure I couldn’t possibly misinterpret his words. “I think it’s time I keep my promise to you, love.”

“T-tonight?” I stuttered, clearing my throat because I didn’t understand why I suddenly felt so nervous.

“Unless you don’t want to,” Hongjoong said, finally dismissing the stack of papers on his desk. He stood tall over me, cornering me back against the frame of the bed. “I won’t force you.”

“I know,” I said, hesitantly reaching out to steady my hands against his chest. “But it’s been so long and I didn’t know if you were even interested in me anymore.”

He tilted my chin up, forcing our eyes to meet. “You’re the most interesting person I’ve ever met, Y/N. Never think otherwise.”

It was strangely emotional, the way he spoke to me. “I won’t,” I managed to say because my heart was racing in my chest and he was very close to me. 

“Lay down,” he instructed me gently and I wordlessly complied, making myself comfortable against the sparse sheets. Meanwhile, Hongjoong had grabbed the hem of his shirt, bringing it over his head before tossing it into the floor. My breath hitched in my throat, admiring his lean torso, muscles building his frame from years of hard work aboard the ship. “You’re beautiful,” he told me earnestly. “Can you take off your clothes for me?”

I nodded in response, trembling fingers making quick work of my pants, fingernails scratching the skin of my thighs as I quickly forced them down my legs. I toed them off on the floor, reaching down for my shirt before allowing it to join the pile of clothes we were accumulating against the hardwood floors of the cabin. I slowly exhaled when I was fully naked, resisting the urge to cover myself because Hongjoong’s gaze was intense, eyes moving up and down my figure with barely constrained lust. “Perfect,” he whispered, weight dipping along the edge of the bed. I was a complete mess, barely holding back when he was hovering over me, all sinewy muscles and hard lines from the crest of his shoulders to the curves of his legs. 

“Please,” I groaned, tangling my hands in the soft strands of strawberry hair before forcing his mouth against mine, kissing him with an urgency resulting from an entire month of covetous glances on the main deck. 

“I want you so much,” Hongjoong said, voice husky as his words made me feel nothing short of desired. 

“You shouldn’t have kept me waiting,” I teased him, despite the Captain’s crooked smile.

His kisses were scorching, igniting a flame of desire in the parts of my soul that had never been touched before. I felt his hands trail down my legs, parting my thighs so that I could finally feel his hot erection. “Yes,” I moaned, breaking our kiss to look at the place where he was sliding inside, bringing us together intimately while he started to nose along the side of my neck. “I can’t trust myself around you, love,” he said. “You make me a very dangerous man.”

His cock hit deeper. “You were already dangerous, Captain.”

Fingers brushed teasingly down the sides of my waist, thumbs digging into the jutting bones of my hips. “Let me try again,” he insisted. “I can’t control the way I feel and that makes me dangerous to everyone, including myself.” 

I moaned when his teeth followed the curve of my neck, arched back against his ministrations. “Which is a bad thing?”

“Very,” he agreed. “When I would sacrifice everything, even my own life, just to see you safe.”

“You don’t mean that,” I said, gasping at an aggressive thrust that nearly knocked the air out of my lungs.

“Look at me,” he growled, a sound that went straight to my growing arousal, but I still forced my eyes to open. “I do mean it,” he said. “I would do anything for you.”

I started crying, the weight of his words and the heavy presence between my legs were all playing with the delicate string barely anchoring me to reality. He was a master of seduction, breath hot as he moved in closer to my ears. “I’ll ruin you.”

That was all that I needed to tip me over the edge, losing myself completely to Hongjoong. I cried into his shoulder, gripping tighter to the smooth skin of his broad shoulders, riding out the lingering pulses of pleasure and verging on overstimulated. “Hongjoong,” I gasped, feeling his grip on my thighs tighten as he pushed in harder, barely allowing me any room to breathe. His lips were messy as they demanded long, passionate kisses.

“Hold on for me, love,” he said, hips rocking against mine for a moment longer before stilling completely. 

He collapsed next to me, chest moving up and down to accommodate his exhaustion. “You weren’t a liar,” I commented with a delirious giggle, crowding even closer to him with one arm wrapped over his waist.

Hongjoong was quiet, the only indication that he was still awake being the slow way his fingers traced along my spine. Finally, he gripped my chin, tilting my head to meet his gaze. I was surprised to see the sadness there, despite our previous coupling. “I love you,” he whispered earnestly while a few stray tears fell from the corners of his lovely brown eyes.

[euphorianyx]

NOTHING SERIOUS |{opt}one shot|

Pairing: Wooyoung & Reader & Choisan Genre: Not particular maybe angsty something / Cheating!W  Summary: You and Wooyoung have been together for some time yet things are about to change since he now officially has a group. What he does about it may not be easy on you and you find Choisan is the one sees that.

The bell rang and you were more than happy the very second. Wooyoung finally arrived so did the comfortable evening. He looked more handsome than ever in his all black fit and damp hair falling each side of his face. 

You ran towards Wooyoung and he pulled you for a tight hug. His arms wrapped around you felt nice so when he decided to let you go you did not let him. With a warm smile he carried you to his room. 

Your favorite Netflix show was reflected on the wall. Laying down on the bed you started it. Through the giggles you could not focus on anything at all. You saw the familiar intense look in his eyes right before his hands skimmed on your body. Rolling yourself, you were hovering over him with your hands on his chest.

“I thought you were tired.”

You stated, since he came back from dance practice. One hand under his head other on your waist he raised his eyebrows.

“Not anymore...”

You knew what was coming and could not help the feeling pile up in your stomach. Soon your clothes mixed each other on the floor. Losing yourself in the pleasure you let Wooyoung take the control. Trying to muffle your screams you kept kissing him.

By the morning you realized you failed about that. The guys obviously heard you two since they kept talking about how they could not sleep. Seeing your cheeks getting red Wooyoung stepped in.

“Guys really... Don’t you have other things to talk about... Stop already...”

They did as he told and the crowded breakfast in the circle table was peaceful until that certain statement.

“So you two seem serious about each other...”

Focused on your plate, you waited for Wooyoung’s answer. They probably could hear your heart beating through the silence but you could not care less. Taking a look at your side Wooyoung bit his lip. He was and he would admit it but that meant putting everything at risk. The group, their future... Also the company made it clear they could not have any relationship so it was literally impossible.  

“We are just hanging out. Nothing serious.”

Those words hardly fell from his lips. Knowing he could not offer more this was the only thing he could do. After the way you closed your eyes and took that deep breath Wooyoung knew how hurt you were. Though you tried to smile as if everything was okay.

“Yeah.”

You tried your best to confirm what he said. However you could not hold yourself much longer so you excused yourself for something you made up instantly.

“I will help my sister for today so I should get going .”

Wooyoung knew why you left. It took all his strength not to run after you. He barely kept it together until he locked himself in his room. He tried everything to calm down and convince himself that he did the right thing.

Being the only one absent at the breakfast Choisan saw you by the main door. Getting closer he noticed you were a mess. Though you saw him only after he stopped right in front of you. His soft voice filled your ears as he asked.

“What happened?”

You did not want to tell him but San was not the one to give up. He did not let you get away. Eventually, you opened up and told him everything while still sitting by the stairs. Seeing you break into tears San never left your side. Even though you told him to go back he refused and kept walking with you. 

Spending the entire day together it was almost midnight. You sat down at a random café you found open. You only wanted something to drink but San ordered food of course.

“Listen... You really should eat something.”

You shook your head in disapproval.

“San I don’t want anything.”

San drifted the tray towards your side and feed you some of the fries. You thanked him then silence fell. Surprising you he was the first one to break it.

“Y/N I know Wooyoung likes you...”

With your index finger on his lips you stopped San from talking as you repeated what Wooyoung said.

“Nothing serious... If he actually did there would be more so let’s not talk about it.”

San tried to find something else to say but nothing seemed to be working so he kept quiet. When you felt another wave of tears coming through you burried your head to his chest. When you realized his white tshirt was strained with your mascara you apologized.

“I am sorry...”

San did not realize why you apologized at first but when he saw you looking at his tshirt he wrapped his arms around you.

“Hey...It’s okay.”

You spent a few more minutes with your head burried there until your sobs died down. You looked up at him to let him know you were better but stopped as your eyes met. His fingers between your hair felt good, his arms felt warm. Only then you realized you did not want to move. 

Even though you tried to fight the urge, your lips met. The kiss you shared was slow yet fiery. After shame kicked in you pulled away with your face behind your hands.

“We shouldn’t...”

Looking away from you San cleared his throat.

“I know !”

Seeing his hand turned into a fist, you reached for it.

“San, you both are friends and I don’t want to mess it up.”

San directed his deep gaze back to you.

“We live through our choices Y/N and what happens is also his choice so...”

Those words were literally a green light and you were in no mood to resist. When your hand reached for his face San leaned towards you right away. Your lips found each other again. You were out of breath when he pulled away. Without a single word you left the café hand in hand.

The closest motel did not seem luxurious or anything but it was moderate to spend the night. Since San could not do it, you went to the desk to book the room as if it was for yourself. The old lady believed you were alone so did not question you at all. You gestured San to follow you to the elevator.

The small place made things harder even though you avoided eye contact the tension was undeniable. You made it to the room one hundred fourty two and stopped by the wooden door. Your hands were shaking so you handed the keys to San. His hand reached for the lock but he stopped. His dark eyes were holding yours as he asked.

“Are you sure about this? I don’t want you to regret later because we can never take it back.”

Biting your lip you shook your head.

“I don’t know but I need you.”

Those words were enough for you to stick your bodies together and stumble inside the room. Your hands were hesitating on his tshirt but when San took the lead your doubts or shyness left you. Wasting no time you got rid of each others clothes. 

His kiss, his touch, how his skin felt under your fingertips were unfamiliar. Though you never felt uncomfortable. He explored the spots even you were not aware of. He pushed your limits in a different way. As San took you higher and higher his name fell from your lips again. When it all hit you like a wave your bodies let go. Then the only sound in the room was you two trying to catch your breaths. 

You both had a lot to say but neither of you dared to speak. He knew this was for one night but everything about you pierced his soul. You were like a venom he will need to get out of his system but the way your hand searching for him through your sleep did not help anything.

By the morning you woke up with the constant buzzing of his phone. Barely able to open your eyes you whispered his name but San gestured you to keep quiet or they could hear you.

“We have got another practice today.”

San explained even though he did not want to leave. Then the fact he was going to see Wooyoung hit you. He sat there with his head between his hands. You hugged him from behind softly asking.

“What do you think?”

Your gaze finally met each other.

“I don’t know if we should keep this a secret or tell him.”

You let a deep sigh out.

“If we tell him he will not forgive us, will he?”

San agreed with a nod then pulled you closer. With your arms around his neck you sat on his lap for a little. The screen on your phone lit so you reached for it. You both saw the text from Wooyoung.

I am sorry Y/N. I care about you and I want more. I tried to do what’s right but I need you. Can’t we talk about us?

When your eyes met again you could see San was expecting an answer for the unasked question. WHO WERE YOU GOING TO CHOOSE? 

Alright first I know this Y/N is far from being innocent even though she seems so. And I am thinking of two alternative parts on her choosing Wooyoung and her choosing Choisan. What do you guys say?

[worlds-shortest-astronaut]

Ateez - Inception Thoughts

First of all, this is the first proper love song that Ateez have released. They’ve sung about love before but this is the first song that really seems to centre around romantic love and the emotions they experience because of it. 

Second of all, Inception feels like quite a big departure from their usual sound. It DEFINITELY is a good way to shift into a new era. It’s also sounds more mature and less bombastic. It’s intimate. It’s also really, really intense. 

I’m in love - YeosANG lines

also starting the song off with the killing part? BRAVE

I really like how sparse the instrumentation is at the start - it’s VERY DREAMY (text painting? Umu from @reacttothek will have to answer that one)

UGH i LOVE the pulsing low string/piano/hybrid synth during Yeosang/Yunho’s parts. 

From Seonghwa up until Wooyoung, all of the melodic material is carried by vocals. There’s no melodic synth, just percussion. Then the synth comes back in with Wooyoung’s part. 

Back. Ing. Vo. Cals. Backing VOCALS - Ateez always use them so effectively

The “oo-oo-oo”s

There’s a higher harmony over San and Wooyoung’s part which helps thicken the texture without taking away that dreamy aspect

Okay i LOVE the percussion in this first part of the verse - it’s regular but the way they stress the different parts of the beat make it feel like it’s staggering a bit

Hongjoong’s rap

 we get different backing bocals - some classic Ateez “eyyyy-ooohhhs”

The pre-chorus build to the chorus is pretty standard. It kind of feels like it starts in half-time and then accelerates but I’m not sure. Yunho’s chest voice/lower vocals are really awesome to here, though. And WOOYOUNG OOF Usually tho, Ateez pre-choruses are elevated so this was a bit different.

JONGHO it is so GOOD to see him sing/dance again!

It is a typical Ateez chorus in that there’s a bit pre-chorus build-up...but the chorus doesn’t feel massive/big like you think it would. It’s like how in Say My Name all that energy from the pre-chorus doesn’t resolve in something faster. Instead, the chorus is really heavy and it actually pulls back. The 1st part of the Inception chorus feels like that too.

Nice light higher harmony over Jongho and Yunho

There’s one kind of snare-like percussion synth which stays really echo-y. I like it cos it keeps the dreamy sensation - like your world is kind of fragmenting

Okay okay okay the SECOND (2nd) part of the Inception chorus - the part which actually murdered 83% of this fandom (i had to listen to this like 5 times).

Segonhwa’s “every day and every nigh i’m gonna chase you” - oh my GOD first of all. That shit sexc. That’s all folks.

Jks. The way he switches from chest voice to falsetto feels so PURPOSEFUL? which makes it even more attractive because it implies a kind of very tight control. 

Wooyoung’s ‘I in love’ layers over Seonghwa’s line and I’m obSEssED with it - it’s a totally different part from Seonghwa’s line, though both melodies move in a downwards direction. I think the overlap again reflects this whole idea of being in a dream. Things overlap and start and end at different times in a dream. It’s really just one sensation after another LIKE THIS SONG AHHHHH

Have I said backing vocals already? Yes I have. Will I say it again? Yes I will. The way they play with the lo-o-o-ve holy SHIT it GUIDES you through the song. It feels like it’s pulling you. 

Weirdly enough there isn’t a very prominent bass synth/part in this section. Makes it seem more FLOATYYYY

Mingi and Hongjoong’s shouted line? we love rap line. It’s such a nice contrast to the moving vocals.

OH MY GOD THE POST-CHORUS DANCE BREAK I GOT WHIPLASH

first of all, who puts a dance break (it’s like a Solid Length as well) after the first verse/chorus? Literally only Ateez. Who is doing it like them/their production team? It did remind me a bit of the post-chorus in VeriVery’s Thunder which was also AWESOME

Again, it kind of feels like half-time, or their emphasising beats 1 and 3 rather than 1,2,3,4

Also again, it’s super sparse and kind of stays in the higher ranges. i LOVE the way the synth bounces around

Yeosang’s lines (we stan - also his dance solo? I see you contemporary dance lessons)

Okay we’re DEFS in half-time here at LEAST

also we LOVE verses with DIFFERENT MELODIC MATERIAL give me more PLEASE

Mingi please step on me - i love that his rap is slower and deeper than Hongjoong’s

HNNNNNGGG different percussion from the second pre-chorus into the chorus that’s hot

Also San getting a chorus part hits different. I feel like San usually does a lot of verse/bridge work OR the response part in a call/response chorus. Having him get the main part of a chorus was SO COOL pop off with your gorgeous vocals my man

Jongho’s ad-libs I hear you and thank you

Wooyoung please do not sing ‘i’m in love’ like that it hurts my feelings

Okay bridge

the bridge bugged me at first because there’s no change in energy. like it stays at the same energy as the chorus when usually it drops off a little

but also the BRIDGE POPS OFF WITH NEW MELODIC MATERIAL UGH WE LOVE TO HEAR IT

its kind of a long bridge and i feel like there’s 3 parts to it

there’s the first vocal part with Seongwha and Yunho really using their chest voices (as;glaksjd;lgkj i love them so much). there’s also a nice new synth melody which kind of bursts on to the scene

There’s San and Wooyoung - i LOVE their part. They kind of break the 4th wall by addressing the audience. Rhythmically it’s also kind of fast. San’s falsetto is hot. 

RAP LINE YESSSS give me some ANGST. Of course we have Jongho belting that last line. 

as;aldkgja;lskdgjha;slgja;slkgdj a the INSTRUMENTATION CUTS OUT EXCEPT FOR THE DRUM which BURST into the last chorus oh my GOD this is so attractive and i don’t even know why. 

AHHHH THE JONGHO/SEONGHWA HIGH NOTE - lads i was NOT prepared. the HARMONY. I’m pretty sure it’s a chest/head mix. whatever it is it’s hot. the ANGST. the HEARTACHE. GODDAMN

Jongho just riffing thru the whole last chorus we stan

Jongho’s “i’m in love” and the little riff he adds is actually ART

I love that it ends with a rap line shouting ‘hey’ idk why. it’s like a nice flourish

Music video: gorgeous. The water scene and then the way they added fire to the ceiling? GeNIUS. Not a huge fan of school uniform styling but we’ll let it slide co everything else was stunning.