#wonder if it's intentional - or just subconscious mirroring

[ickyuji]

ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 yuji gets dizzy too easy. gentle touches that should have been seen as innocent… laced, heavy, interwoven with the suggestion of something more salacious.

your pretty, manicured fingers resting along the curve of muscle that denoted his gentle strength planted like it belonged there. wondering what if would feel like if you squeezed, actions inhibited in between throws of pleasure.

“yuji?” you sing songed at him, wondering where he went when he looked off into the distance. pouting with the need to have his attention at all times. sugary sweet, a toothache just waiting to happen.

“mmm?” your best friend answered back, trying to keep the facade that everything was okay in his head. smiling like he wasn’t just thinking about the heat of your cunt.

“where do you go?” you giggled, the hand that had been subconsciously squeezing his bicep slotting itself between the space of his arm and body. pulling yourself in as close as possible, too used to prancing around him. bouncy…

the singular restraint of not spilling the fact that he fantasized regularly about the shape of your body squeezed down between the space of his hips and bed formed a sharp twitch to his brow.

“no where. ‘m right here. do you want ice cream?” he suggested, needing something cool to keep the simmer down. lips curling into a smile when he saw the enthusiasm behind your reaction. eyes wide and twinkling while you nodded your head.

“please! how many scoops can i get?” you inquired, pressing your head to his bicep as a thank you. his hummingbird heart mirroring your own flutter.

scoffing at the question, like he would ever deny you anything.

“as many as you want.” yuji stated. huffing in annoyance with the fact that he would have to trek forward while his cock head pressed uncomfortably against his waistband. a recent addition to his preparation in your hang outs, knowing his cock would swell the second he saw you. tortured with the fact that he was such a big pervert, priding himself in protecting you- tugging you away from interactions where he could smell less than pure intentions.

stomach twisting with the fact that the type of men he shooed away was standing right next to you.

[paperlovesadness]

So... When are we gonna talk about Miles and Alex suddenly both being in their "skinny paisley silky scarf thrown casually over the neck without really even tying it" era?

Because it's an interesting coincidence 👀

[justice4gyeongsu]

━━━ 'CHAPTER FOUR' [WHEN DAWN BREAKS]

SYNOPSIS ➢ a fast-spreading outbreak soaks the school in blood. quite literally & figuratively.

PAIRING ➢ lee suhyeok x male!reader

AU ➢ enemies-to-lovers au!

CONTENT WARNING ➢ this chapter contains; classism, homophobia, bullying, embarrassment, mentions of gore, blood, cannibalism [let me know if i missed any!]

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[DAY OF THE OUTBREAK…]

sitting at your front door, tying your shoes, you can't shake the feeling that something's off. last night's sleep was weirdly quiet - no dreams, no whispers in your ear, no memories bubbling up to the surface. just a big, empty space where your subconscious usually runs wild. it's unnerving, to be honest. you're used to your mind being a bit of a battlefield, even when you're sleeping. but last night, it was like someone hit the mute button. and now you're left wondering if this is what it's like when... well, when it's all over. is it just silence? nothingness?

the thought sends a shiver down your spine. you're not sure what's more unsettling - the idea of an afterlife that's just a blank slate, or the possibility that last night was just a weird fluke. either way, you can't shake the feeling that something's shifted, and you're not sure what's coming next.

your father's footsteps broke the spell, and you refocused on tying your shoes as the TV droned on in the background. the familiar sounds of his morning routine were comforting - washing dishes, drinking tea, and making job calls. occasionally, he'd cook breakfast, a rare treat when finances allowed. you'd learned to supplement your meals with snacks from school, stashing them away for weekends.

as the news anchor spoke, a name caught your attention - "missing student from hyosan high" - and you turned to see the scientist teacher's son on screen. but before you could process the news, your father's gruff voice cut in, "what'd you do to your hair?" his question was a stark reminder of your own daily struggles. you hesitated, a sheepish shrug your only response. the salt spray you'd applied to enhance your natural texture had slipped your mind, but the 35 anxious glances in the mirror hadn't. you'd sought validation in your reflection, ensuring the subtle waves framed your face just so. "just wanted to, uh, try something different," you mumbled, the words trailing off like a hesitant confession.

your father's gaze lingered for a moment, as if searching for a hidden meaning, before he turned away, disappearing into his room. the unspoken dismissal was clear: time to head out. with a quiet sigh, you grabbed your bag and slipped out the door, leaving the uncertainty of your father's reaction behind, like a lingering whisper in the morning air.

as you locked the door, a spark of excitement ignited. you headed down the steps with enthusiasm, careful not to trip. today was a first: ditching the bus for your bike. it was a small change, but one that filled you with unexpected joy. the prospect of feeling the wind and sun on your face was exhilarating. you smiled at how something so simple had awakened a sense of adventure. your feet hit the concrete with a loud thud, and as you looked up, three imposing figures loomed before you. their black coats billowed behind them like dark wings, and their smiles seemed to hold a sinister intent. you knew exactly who they were - and your heart sank. one of them concealed a bat behind his back, and your excitement was replaced with icy fear. paralyzed, you couldn't even think of calling the police. your father's words still lingered in your mind: "if you want me to live, let them beat me." the memory of his scolding made your stomach twist with anxiety. the men simply walked past you and began to head to the door you once came from only seconds ago. with shaking hands, you hastily untied your bike and stuffed the chain into your backpack, desperate to escape the ominous scene unfolding before you.

as you entered the classroom, your gaze instinctively sought out choi namra, your deskmate and sole point of reference. the murmur of conversations momentarily subsided as you took your seat, but you stood firm, refusing to be swayed by the subtle scrutiny of your peers. today, you had made a deliberate choice to style your hair, sweeping it aside to reveal your face in a departure from your usual disheveled appearance. the tangled locks that often obscured your features were now neatly parted, with wavy bangs framing your tired eyes. just as you settled into your chair, a gentle voice pierced the air, speaking from behind namra, who was engrossed in her textbooks. onjo's warm, kind eyes met yours, accompanied by a soft smile and a subtle thumbs-up. "y/n-ah, you look great today," she said, her words catching you off guard with their sincerity. a spark of surprise ignited within you, leaving you momentarily breathless. did she just say.. great?

your eyes only blankly blinked at her words until you cleared your throat, “w-what?” you asked. unfortunately, the sound of a high-pitched voice had cut off onjo’s next words. “yah!” the entire classroom was now facing a pink-cardigan-wearing nayeon who angrily stepped towards her desk. to which, he was surrounded by wujin and his friends. “get off of there. you stink,” she commanded to gyeongsu, who was sitting on top of her desk. your eyebrows raised at the interaction, gyeongsu hopped off the abnormally upset girl's desk. “oh, okay. my bad,” he spoke with a slight confusion in her tone. he proceeds to wipe off any excess ‘stink’ that he might have left, nayeon raises her voice once again at this. “cut it out! you're so dirty,” she shouts in disgust while moving her backpack away from him. to say that nayeon was privileged was an understatement, but you knew that already. “what the hell is your problem?” gyeongsu murmurs before taking a step forward in rising annoyance.

luckily, his friend cheongsan wraps his arms around his shoulder and tells him to just let it go. knowing that arguing with a disdainful girl like nayeon was practically a suicide mission. before the situation could escalate for the worse, the teacher stepped foot into the classroom. signaling everyone to stop chatting and head to their respective seats.

as the chairs scraped against the floor, your gaze wandered to the window. a tiny mosquito buzzed against the pane, trying to get in. this reminded you of what those threatening men called your father - a mosquito. they said he was a nuisance who took risks and left problems behind. you wondered why your father never talked about his life, before or now. he kept his secrets to himself, never sharing anything you wanted to know. his silence was frustrating, and you wished he would open up.

“alright everyone, c'mon bring up the phones.” your teacher announced. everyone piled to the front to bring their phones, it wasn't something you cared for. the only person you would text nowadays should be your father. if he didn't get a new one every other week that is.

with what money? you never did ask.

when everyone finishes turning their phones in the teacher, being as intelligent as she is, texts the classroom group chat and you suddenly hear a notification sound coming from right in front of you. your long-ago friend, wujin, and to the right of him, was daesu. who quickly looked behind him and looked at namra and you. pretending it was you two who had their phone still, however the entire class knew it was him. including your teacher. “daesu, seriously?” a voice asked in disbelief as the rest of the class laughed at his failed scheme so early in the morning.

the teacher began to go on about english studies and you tried your best to focus this time. to put in effort and change your lifestyle around. you're gonna be the best version of yourself, you're tired of trying to blend in and be accepted, and you will exceed in everything you do your studies, the way you carry yourself, everything. today was the day when you no longer lived in fear and humiliation. the new you was something you are ready for and you're starting to no longer care if others aren't. “y/n-ah!” your head snapped up to the teacher who smiled at you and pointed at your hair, “you look so handsome, wow.” to say your cheeks heat up in embarrassment was an understatement, the class had quiet giggles and all eyes were on you once again. you nodded your head and awkwardly cleared your throat. “let's see… how about you give me your take on individuality, in this case?” she points to the chalkboard where she wrote her previous inquisitions.

with a surge of determination, you straightened your posture, shedding the timid persona that had held you back for so long. just 24 hours ago, you were a different person, but now, you were ready to evolve. taking a deep breath, you began to speak, your voice steady and clear. "um, in this character's case, …she lacks the idea of being her own person. she feeds off of what her friends decide at every moment.." you carefully avoided eye contact with your classmates, focusing intently on your words. "meaning that she kinda sets herself up for disappointment when her results don't match her peers." as you finished speaking, you felt a sense of pride and accomplishment. your teacher's eyebrows shot up in surprise, and a moment of silence hung in the air before she responded, "perfect answer." the words hung in the air like a badge of honor, a testament to your growth and newfound confidence.

suddenly, her eyes darted to the other side of the classroom and her gleeful demeanor changed instantly to a sternful one. “you, bare-su, stand up.” everyone's eyes shot to the back of the class, except yours. “what's with ‘bare-su’?” she asks as he stands up and everyone laughs once again but a little louder now. as you stare out the window, the uncomfortable conversation fades into the background. you'd rather not dwell on the past or revisit old emotions.

the warm sunbeams streaming through the glass wrap around you, and your mind begins to wander. a familiar figure pedals into your daydream - the boy from the bike shop, with eyes like a fox and dark hair that makes your heart skip a beat. the memory of him is a balm to your soul, a sight that soothes your eyes and stirs your pulse. the thought of seeing him again sends a thrill through you, and you can't help but wonder when your paths will cross once more.

kyungho, kyungho, kyungho…

the name stuck to you while you gaze at nothing in the classroom. “oh yeah? what did y/n just say then?” the teacher's question cut through the air, snapping you back to reality as it echoed off the wooden classroom walls. suhyeok's eyes widened in surprise, his gaze fixed on you as if seeing you in a new light. your hair, styled differently, and your eyes, no longer hidden, seemed to have caught him off guard. as his gaze met yours, you quickly looked away, pretending not to care, trying to conceal the flutter in your chest. you didn't want him to think you still had feelings for him, that his presence still affected you.

“he uh… he said..”

just as suhyeok was about to speak, hyeonju burst into the classroom, her shocking appearance captivating everyone's attention. her face was pale, with blood trickling down her cheeks and lips. gasps filled the room as the teacher called out her name, but hyeonju collapsed to the ground, unresponsive. classmates rushed to her side, forming a circle around her as ms. park rushed to her aid. you remained seated, stunned, as ms. park cradled hyeonju's limp body, her face a picture of brutal injury. it looked like she had been hit by a car, with deep gashes and bruises covering her skin. the room was filled with worried murmurs and shocked expressions, as everyone struggled to process the scene unfolding before them.

you stood slowly from your seat when you heard someone ask their friend beside them “did she just say the science teacher drugged her?” your heart dropped. you had had some odd conversations with the science teacher before. him asking you to stay a bit after class and telling you if you felt like you needed to defend yourself from others, to always fight back, and then they’ll leave you alone.

little did he know that you have already done that and it still didn't exactly solve your crisis. you would just nod and awkwardly look away before saying you had to be home soon or else your father was going to come looking for you, even if you both knew, he probably wouldn't. on certain days, the man's demeanor shifted to one of frantic urgency, as he emphasized the harsh principles of survival of the fittest. his intensity was unsettling, leaving you concerned about his well-being. before you could ask if he was okay, he would dismiss you, leaving your questions unspoken. reflecting on these encounters, you revisited the memories, searching for any subtle signs that might have hinted at his inner turmoil.

“we gotta get her up, can you get up, hyeonju-ah?” the teacher tried speaking calmly, but every student in the room knew she was frightened just as much as you all were. “i'll carry her,” suhyeok offered, and began carrying the drifting girl on his back with isak and onjo following out shortly behind. ms. park closed the sliding door, leaving all the students to gather in small groups and discuss what they had just witnessed.

the lunch bell's gentle chime echoed through the school's corridors, signaling the start of the midday break. students sprang into action, eager to escape their classrooms. but you lingered, lost in thought, as you made your way out. questions swirled in your mind: what was wrong with hyeonju? why were people blaming the science teacher? would she recover? and then, a nagging doubt: was suhyeok really looking at me-

you looked up to see cheolsu, a quiet boy often overlooked by his peers, crumpled on the floor. he winced in pain, his eyes wide with surprise, as if your accidental stare had been a physical blow. "oh, cheolsu, are you okay?" you asked, offering a helping hand and lifting him up with ease. the height difference between you two was striking, with cheolsu's slouched posture making him appear even smaller. "ugh, s-sorry...i was in a rush," he stuttered, his eyes cast downward, a habitual gesture that spoke volumes about his struggles.

you shook your head and apologized, "no, sorry, my fault, I wasn't paying attention." as you took a deep breath, your gaze lingered on the scabs around his neck, a subtle hint of a hidden struggle. sensing your notice, he seemed to shield his secret, and you instinctively covered the area with a gentle touch, pretending to rub his neck. seeking to shift the focus, you asked, "heading to the cafeteria?" but he sidestepped your question, his eyes locking onto your hair as he asked, "what's up with your hair?" the familiar criticism stung, a reminder of the constant scrutiny you'd been facing.

“j-just uh,” you hesitate, “doing something different,” you responded while clearing your throat, trying oh so desperately to avoid the awkward ambiance. cheolsu stared at your new look for a few more seconds until he looked at something behind you, his eyes widened before moving to the wall quickly. bewildered by his action, turning to see someone you despised. myunghwan, walking with changhoon smirked as they looked in both of your directions.

your heart sank as you turned to face myunghwan, his smug expression making your blood boil. changhoon, walked alongside him, a sneer twisting his features. you felt cheolsu's tension beside you, his eyes fixed on the duo with a mixture of wariness and hostility.

"look at this," myungwhan stated. they snickered to one another. you rolled your eyes and looked away trying to keep yourself neutral despite the growing unease in your chest. myunghwan chuckled, his eyes gleaming with amusement. his gaze roved over your new appearance, his expression dripping with disdain. "i see, you're trying to.. reinvent yourself," you rolled your eyes, fists clenched. “fuck off.”

but myunghwan just laughed, his eyes glinting with malice. "what, y/n? you gonna defend your new boyfriend? how cute.." you felt a surge of anger at his jab, but cheolsu's warning glance kept you from responding. changhoon, however, seemed eager to stir up more trouble. "yeah, what's going on between you two? you're not...together, are you?"

the air seemed to thicken with tension as myunghwan's smirk grew wider. you knew you had to defuse the situation before it escalated further. but how? you felt a familiar knot in your stomach as myunghwan's smirk seemed to grow roots, digging deeper into your skin. "what's going on here?" a soft voice interrupted, slicing through the thick air.

you turned to see a quiet figure emerging from the crowd, their eyes fixed on changhoon with a mixture of curiosity and wariness.

myunghwan's smirk faltered, and for a moment, you saw a glimmer of uncertainty. "just having a little chat," he said, his tone dripping with false nonchalance. the nurse's gaze lingered on myunghwan before shifting to you and cheolsu. "looks like a pretty one-sided conversation to me." the air seemed to vibrate with unspoken words, and you sensed a hidden dynamic at play. myunghwan's eyes narrowed, but the nurse's calm demeanor didn't waver. you looked down to see a rather odd looking infection on the nurses arm. her arm turning an almost black color, her neck twitching. cheolsu and you shared a look of concern, “um..m-miss…” cheolsu couldn't bring himself to ask so he simply pointed at her revealing forearm.

but before he could say another word, the nurse's eyes rolled back in her head, revealing only whites. her body began to twitch and convulse, her limbs flailing wildly like a puppet on a broken string. her skin turned a sickly shade of green, as moldy bread and dark veins bulge beneath the surface like twisted rivers. a low, guttural moan escaped her lips, growing louder and more menacing with each passing moment. she lunged at changhoon, her fingers grasping for his face like claws, her teeth snapping wildly with almost animalistic hunger. changhoon screamed, his voice high-pitched and terrified, as the nurse's zombie form tackled him to the ground. her hands closed around his head, her fingers digging into his hair like talons. cheolsu stumbled backward, tripping over his own feet as he desperately tried to escape the horror unfolding before him. his eyes were wide with fear, his face pale and sweaty. “what the…?”

suddenly the nurse took a huge chunk of the screaming boys cheek with her teeth. his screams reached new heights as he frantically tried to shake off the nurse's grip, but she held firm. his eyes widened in terror as he realized the nurse's eyes had turned a strange, almost feral gray. just as suddenly as it had begun, the nurse released her grip on the boy's cheek, and he stumbled backward, clutching at the wound. myungwhan saw the opportunity to shove her however, she had other plans. she rushed at him next but myungwhan turned around and shoved you while swiftly running away down the hallway. where many students were gathered around eyeing the intense and gorey happening just seconds ago. they all screamed and began to scatter, seeing that now changhoon was thrashing on the ground uncontrollably.

you hold your shoulder with your right hand, myungwhan had shoved you with full force causing your shoulder to ache and sting. you wince as you quickly gather yourself. you grabbed cheolsu’s arm, pulling him away from the chaos with a strength that was almost desperate. "we need to get out of here, now!" you yelled, dragging him down the hallway as the sound of the nurse's moans echoed behind you, growing fainter but no less terrifying.

cheolsu stumbled after you, your heart racing with fear. the hallway seemed to stretch on forever, the lockers and classrooms blurring together in a mad whirl of color and sound. you could hear the distant moans of people, growing fainter but still echoing through the corridors like a chilling reminder of the horror you'd just witnessed.

"wait, slow down!" he yelled, his voice hoarse from fear.

you didn't listen. your eyes were fixed on the outside quad, you could hear the distant moans and screams, growing louder with every step. you wrenched open the doors and shoved cheolsu first outside before you. "close it! close it!" you shouted, following close behind. as you shut the doors, you see students screaming inside and running into classrooms. panting, you gripped your shoulder once again in pain, while you both noticed people running away outside as well. “shit,” you cursed. “run! everyone run!” you turned to hear a girl screaming while running across the schools soccer field only to get tackled by two other bloodied peers. cheolsu shared a look with you before you both ran toward the outside set of stairs of the school as the infected horde burst through the doors you were once holding behind you.

climbing up the stairs, step by step, you felt weightless until a sudden jolt sent you flying. your body rolled and bounced, landing with a sickening crack on your shoulder. the pain was excruciating, and your scream echoed through the staircase as you finally came to rest at the bottom. gritting your teeth, you opened your eyes to see the cause of your fall: a girl with black braided pigtails, her leg twisted at an unnatural angle, bone protruding from her skin. her eyes, bloodshot and wild, locked onto yours as she gurgled and began to crawl towards you with an unnatural speed. you rolled onto your side, desperate to escape, but she climbed on top of you, her grip on your sweater tightening as she pulled herself up to your face. with a surge of adrenaline, you grabbed a nearby rock with your one good hand and swung it behind you, connecting with a sickening crunch.

in a stroke of luck, the rock sent the girl flying onto the grass, momentarily freeing you. as you gazed up, cheolsu remained paralyzed on the same step, his eyes wide with shock. “cheolsu, help-” you yelled, but the girl latched onto your ankle, attempting to sink her teeth in. you grunted, shaking her off with a series of swift kicks. cheolsu's horror-stricken expression lingered as the girl scaled you once more, her relentless grip unyielding. trying to wriggle free from the girls grasps, you look around quickly to find anything to get away.

just as all hope seemed lost, a fleeing girl accidentally collides with your attacker, diverting her attention. seizing the opportunity, you broke free from the infected girl's grasp. you looked up to see cheolsu's fleeting glance before he turned tail and sprinted up the stairs, abandoning you. “wait, w-where are you going?” you shouted, alarm rising in your voice.

as cheolsu vanished from sight, you sprang to your feet, still reeling from the harrowing encounter. but your relief was short-lived, as another classmate - bloodied and bizarre - began to stir across the school yard. his eyes locked onto yours with a menacing glare, and he charged towards you with a ferocious intensity, plowing through others in his path. his bloody mouth twisted into a snarl as he sprinted closer, and you gasped in terror, bracing yourself for the impending impact. but just as he launched himself into the air, something unexpected happened - a shocking savior appeared out of nowhere, sparing you from the brink of disaster. your eyes widened in astonishment as you turned to behold the last person you ever expected to save your skin.

“we gotta move! come on,” suhyeok grabbed your good arm and pulled you alongside him. you grunted while running feeling a sharp pain every time you moved your body to keep up. you noticed he wasn't alone, choi namra was beside him as well. you never seen her face in any other emotion besides serious. right now, it was horrified.

"what's.. what the fuck is going on?" you panted, wincing in pain as suhyeok's grip tightened around your arm. "what's happening to everyone?"

suhyeok didn't answer, his eyes fixed on some point ahead as he dragged you through the chaotic school yard. choi namra kept pace beside him, her horrified expression never wavering. her eyes darted towards you, and for a fleeting moment, you saw a flicker of concern before her mask of seriousness slipped back into place.

"let me fucking go!" you demanded, trying to keep up with suhyeok's frantic pace. you ripped your arm away from him as you kept running.

"hurry up,," he gritted out, his jaw clenched in determination. "we need to get out of here, now." as you ran, the sounds of mayhem grew louder - screams, crashes, and an eerie, unsettling laughter that sent shivers down your spine. you risked a glance over your shoulder, and what you saw made your blood run cold. the school yard was descending into chaos. students were attacking each other, their eyes vacant, their movements jerky and unnatural. some teachers tried to intervene, but they were vastly outnumbered. the once-familiar surroundings were now a war zone, with desks overturned, windows shattered, and debris scattered everywhere.

suhyeok yanked you back into a sprint, his grip on your arm like a vice. "don't look back!" he yelled. "keep moving!" choi namra kept pace beside him, her eyes scanning their surroundings with a mix of fear and determination. "we need to find a safe place to hide," she shouted above the din. suhyeok nodded, his eyes fixed on a point ahead. "there!"

he led you towards the ladder that was leading up to a window in the school building. you all rushed towards it, once close enough you pushed namra to go first, “go, try to open-”

“no, its not safe. i'll go,” suhyeok states before moving her aside and beginning to climb the ladder, you attempted to hold back an eye-roll. if namra and you were down by where the crazy students were, how were you guys safer..?

you didn't ask the question aloud, as there was no time to bicker over insignificant things. suddenly, you seen two figures barreling towards you and namra. “namra, go up, now!” you grabbed her hand and hoisted her onto the ladder, “go! climb!” you seen suhyeok was being pulled into the window, quickly going back to reach for namra. as namra's feet disappeared into the window, you felt a surge of relief wash over you. but it was short-lived, as you saw suhyeok's eyes widen in terror. "hurry! hurry!" he shouted, his voice strained. you turned to him and tried as quickly as possible to climb with two legs and one working arm. you could hear then snarling as you went upward, when you start to feel the ladder tipping back and forth. the weight of the two men making the ladder almost fold under the pressure, “come on! you got it!”

suhyeoks voice rung through your ears, the burning in your shoulder making you wanna just give up, as you reach your arm for the next step, you suddenly feel yourself being grabbed and hoisted upwards. your body feeling light when you came through the window. suhyeok pulled you with all his might and the pull carried you both to the nearby wall. you stumbled into your dimly lit english classroom, gasping for breath. suhyeok slammed the windows shut behind you, leaning against them to catch his breath. choi namra stood guard, her eyes fixed on the doors as if waiting for the inevitable. you leaned against a nearby wall, your mind reeling with questions.

“so? whats going on out there?” nayeon asked impatiently. out of breath, you held onto to your shoulder gently. everyone out of breath or staring was quiet. no one dared to speak. “are you deaf?” she shouted with a voice crack.

“shut up,” you muttered. everyone's eyes were glued to you now. “what?” she asked with disbelief, folding her arms over her chest. you closed your eyes while holding in tears because of the pain in your shoulder. “i said…shut up.” you repeated with vigor this time. standing upwards nonchalantly while looking at the doors who were being held by your classmates. “oh you little piece of-”

“stop it! both of you! now's not the time for this!” jimin shouted. you winced again with a heavy breath this time. once again all the attention turned towards you. “what happened to you?” onjo asked while walking towards you, only to be stopped by her best friend, cheongsan. onjo glared at him before removing his arm, however choosing to still stand beside him.

“i fell,” they stared at you for more information, “down the stairs outside. one of those..things tackled me.” upon being further informed the students all seemed to be getting more nervous.

“oh..my god. what the hell are they?”

the two girls huddled in the corner with freak-struck facial expressions. meanwhile gyeongsu looked like his arms were gonna break from holding the door from opening. “don't you know? theyre.. zombies.”

[bakugosatoru]

Pretty for the Press

Requests Open! Warnings: Graphic Smut (This is pure PWP smut, MDNI) Genre: Smut Fic Type: Medium Length Fic (4.5k Words) Fandom: My Hero Acadamia Ship: Dabi x Hawks Authors note: My first longer fic! I'm not sure how I feel about it but I like it enough that I do want to share it! I've been working on it for an embarrassingly long time so I hope you like it! Also Dabi is really soft in this and its a little out of character but oh well. Synopsis: Hawks has defected to the side of the villains and is now standing in the League of Villains hideout bathroom, and he needs a haircut. Dabi offers to help. What could go wrong.

Also here on AO3 if you prefer to read over there.

It isn't exactly the Marriott. The yellowing porcelain of the benchtops and the stained brown sinks work to remind him exactly where he is. The bathroom at the league of villains hideout. The porcelain is cool against his hands, his face leaning in towards the cracked and dirty mirror.

It's been three months since Hawk defected to the side of the villains, away from the world of heroes, the world of being a hero. So here Hawks stands, instead of his hero funded penthouse with the nicest things money can buy, he stands in a bathroom, staring at himself in the mirror. Tugging at the strands of his hair. He always forgets how quickly hair grows when not being cut every two weeks to keep up an appearance. 

“So this is why you spend so fucking long in the bathroom huh? Damn you really love looking at yourself that much Birdie?”

Dabi stands, lounging against the doorframe dressed in black sweatpants and a ratty old tank top. Hawks scowls, wondering how long he’d really been there.

“Fuck off Dabi, was just trying to figure out which one of you psychos I’d trust with scissors to cut my hair” The ex-hero smirked, leaning back from the mirror to meet Dabi’s gaze.

“And what was the verdict?” Dabi mused as he wandered over to stand next to Hawks, whose wings quickly tucked into his body to make room. 

Hawks didn’t answer, just going back to pulling and rearranging his hair before huffing and messily tying it back in a stubby ponytail. Dabi spun around and sat against the sink, watching Hawks intently. Hawks feathers puff and ruffle slightly, subconsciously, as he feels Dabis gaze dig into him. It's not often they get time alone together, usually they are either surrounded by other members of the league or fighting for their lives. Doesn’t exactly leave a lot of time for talking. Dabi picked up the discarded and rusted scissors off the counter and held them in front of his eyes, cutting at the air a few times for good measure.

“I mean, I could do it..” Dabi said, spinning the scissors around his pointer finger and tapping his other hand mindlessly against the counter.

“Promise I won't slice ya” 

“Well that just fills me with confidence” Hawks scoffed.

“I mean, the offers there if you want. If you want to keep growing out your hair ‘till you start looking like a homeless guy hanging outside the headquarters that's your call Birdy” 

Hawks paused for a moment, looking over at Dabi. Dabi glanced at him momentarily before returning his gaze to the scissors spinning in his hand. Hawks hated to admit that Dabi was probably his best choice. He couldn't trust Compress or Twice to just do a small trim (they always had a flair for the dramatic), Himeko might get a bit too snip-happy with the scissors and Shigaraki isn't exactly a big fan of… hygiene in general. 

“Fine” Hawks huffed, finally leaning back from the counter.

“Yea?” Surprise painted Dabi’s voice as he hopped off the counter and strolled behind Hawks, yanking a cheap plastic chair over from the corner of the room and placing it right in front of the mirror.

“Well take a seat, get comfortable. Want me to wash your hair first, scalp massage maybe? Perhaps I should get you a cup of tea?” Dabi mocked in a sing-song tone.

“Oh please do, I expect only the best service from a stylist as famous as yourself” Hawks scoffed as he rolled his eyes. He sat down on the chair and leaned back, Dabi now towering behind him in the mirror. A moment paused between them as Dabi looked down at his hair, a hand reaching out gingerly to hold a few strands between his fingers, the back of his hand brushing against Hawks neck gently. Hawks felt a shiver pass through his body to the tip of his wings and he just prayed Dabi didn’t notice.

“Uh actually I might have to wash it…” Dabi mumbled, all the joking bravado in his voice replaced with a nervousness Hawks had never heard coming from the villain before.

“Hm?” Hawks questioned, tilting his head to look up at Dabi, seeing the living skin on his face dusted with a soft pink hue.

“It's just easier to cut wet hair.” Dabi said as he spun the plastic chair around, so that Hawks was now facing him, his back to the sink. Hawks' breath caught in his throat as he looked up at Dabi, who was leaning over to turn on the faucet. Was Dabi going to wash his hair? This really hadn't been how he expected this to go, he assumed Dabi would cut a few inches off his hair and be done with it, but this was a side of Dabi he hadn't seen before. A softer side.

“Okay lean back, the water shouldnt be too hot but my hands aren't exactly great for gauging temperature so if your skin melts off, not my fault.” Dabi said as he moved over to the shower in the corner of the bathroom and snatched up a bottle of shampoo and conditioner. Hawks leant back, awkwardly tilting his head under the faucet to line himself up so the water was in his hair instead of covering his entire face.

“Twice will kill you if he finds out you're going to use his weird expensive shampoo”

“No, he’ll kill you. You're the one using it, I'm just putting it in your hair” Smirked Dabi as he strolled over to the left of Hawks and reached into the sink to help rinse his hair. Hawks felt himself tense as Dabis fingers brushed against his scalp, before relaxing into the touch and letting his eyes shut to prevent getting water in them. 

“So what about that tea you offered?” Hawks smirked as he felt Dabi pour some shampoo on his head and start massaging it into his hair. If he tried really hard he could probably pretend he was back in one of those swanky hair salons his agency used to send him to, but honestly? He preferred this, though he wasn't fully sure why. 

“Hey what the-” Hawks sputtered as he felt water be splashed onto his face. Dabi laughed as Hawks wiped his eyes with his sleeve, opening his eyes to look up at Dabi. His mouth opened to scold him but he paused, Dabi had this mindless smile on his face, not one of his signature smirks, but a genuine smile. 

Hawks hadn’t ever seen Dabi smile like this before.

“I was about to say you were good at this but after that I might have to retract that statement” Hawks teased.

“Aw c’mon Birdy, you like it” 

“Yea I guess I do” Hawks said, his voice quiet, so quiet that Dabi nearly didn't hear him…. But he had heard him.

“I’m sure you had this done all the time when you were a hero” Dabi snipped, a strange venom in his voice, but Hawks just shook it off.

“Yea, too much actually. They would send me every few weeks to make sure my hair was always perfect. ‘Gotta keep up appearances’ they would tell me. So they’d send me to some overpriced salon and get me all dolled up for the press” Hawks sighed, remembering his old life wasn’t exactly his favorite pastime. 

“Which do you like better?” “Hm?”

“Your old salon experiences or this one?” Dabi asked as he washed the last bit of conditioner out of Hawks hair and swapped to rinsing the hair clean. Hawks paused for a moment, staring up at Dabi.

“My old hairstylist was never so gentle” Hawks mumbled, still gazing up at him. Dabi tensed at his words, pulling his hands away and wiping them on a towel. Hawks scolded himself in his head, he was having the perfect moment with Dabi and he had to go say something stupid and spook him. 

He opened his mouth to apologize, or try to play it off, or do something to turn back time to only a few moments ago, but he was stopped by Dabi’s hand resting against his cheek as he leaned in and began to softly dry his hair. Hawks leant forward so he was no longer halfway in the sink as Dabi gently dried his hair with the towel before using the towel to wipe away the water that had splashed on Hawks face.

“I'm sure your old hairstylist never did this either.” Dabi whispered as he placed the towel on the counter and leant down, cupping Hawks face in his hands and brushing their lips together ever so softly, as if asking for permission. Permission that Hawks was more than happy to grant as he reached up and wrapped his arms around Dabis neck, kissing him deeply. Hawks’ mind was racing at a hundred miles an hour. Never in his wildest dreams could he have expected this. Of course he liked Dabi, Dabi was strong, funny, passionate and beautiful. But Dabi was also, well, Dabi; he didn’t expect him to feel the same way.

“Well?” Dabi asked, breaking the kiss but not pulling away. Their lips softly brushed against each other as he spoke.

“Oh, huh?” Stuttered Hawks, every thought in his brain fully occupied with what had just happened.

Dabi chuckled softly, gazing at Hawks' kiss-drunk expression. 

“Have any of your hairstylists ever done that before?” He smirked, kissing Hawks for just a moment before pulling back to allow him to answer.

“No, but I don't mind if this one does” He murmured, mustering every ounce of confidence in his body to stand up and pull Dabi back into a scathing kiss, his hands gripping his black spiked hair, being careful not to pull any staples or hurt the scarred skin. Hawks was usually good at this kind of thing, being a confident hero was all part of his image. Swooning the ladies, charming the press, it was second nature to him. But this? This was different, he had never felt so exposed, he was laying himself bare for a man who he had assumed wanted nothing to do with him. He was offering himself to Dabi, and if Dabi pushed him away now? He would never recover.

But Dabi took his offer

“Wanted to do this for months” Dabi whispered against Hawks lips. Scarred hands gripped his thighs and lifted Hawks up onto the bathroom counter. The plastic chair clattered to the side as Dabi stood between Hawks thighs, kissing him deeply. One of Hawks hands began to tug at the hem of Dabis' shirt. Dabi lifted his arms, allowing him to lift the shirt over his head and toss it to a corner of the bathroom. His hands began to trail along his scarred chest, his finger gently tracing the seams between scarred and living skin. For the first time, Dabi seemed to pull back, breaking the kiss and turning his head to the side.

“You okay? Does that hurt?” Hawks quickly started to pull his hand away but Dabi grabbed it and placed it back on his chest, holding it there and squeezing it slightly.

“No it's fine, just… been a while since anyone touched them, I guess; weird feeling. Just…keep going” Dabi sighed, his head dropping against Hawks shoulder, his hand dropping to the birds thigh as he began kissing along his neck.

“Okay” Hawks whispered, his hands dragging along Dabi’s chest, dragging down towards the hem of his sweatpants, mindlessly fiddling with the drawstring for a moment as he felt Dabi bite down against his neck, licking at the indent left behind.

“Shit- Dabi” Hawks hissed, his hips twitching. 

“Your room, now, please” 

“Don't gotta tell me twice songbird” Dabi hummed, stepping back and dragging Hawks off the counter.

Songbird… Hawks liked that one.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hawks got the wind knocked out of him as Dabi slammed him against the now closed door to his room. He was going to wake up the entire League and he truly didn't seem to care. Because he finally had that stupid bird in his arms.

“Do you know how long i've been trying to get your attention?” Dabi growled against his ear, his hands grabbing Hawks waist. Hawks let out a whine, flattening his chest against Dabis.

“So fucking pretty birdy, everyone wanted to be with the hero Hawks hm? Fucking sucks for them all, ‘cause I get villain Hawks and he is so much better.” Dabi used his grip on the ex-heros waist to push him towards the bed, shoving him backwards. He fell back, his wings splaying across the bed. Dabi couldn't help but smirk. Laid out just for him. He crawled over and straddled Hawks, before leaning forward to catch his lips in a kiss once again, their hips rolling against each other sloppily. They were making out like two teenagers and they couldn't care less. Hawks broke the kiss for a moment to rip his own shirt over his head, but it took a little longer as he had to slide his wings out of it, which Dabi thankfully helped with.

“Always wondered how those wings got in the way of getting dressed, guess now I know” Mused Dabi, his thumbs rubbing circles in Hawks thigh.

“Heh, yea, just as cumbersome as you would think” Laughs Hawks as he finally manages to escape his shirt, launching it across the room.

Dabi paused for a moment, his hands now pressed flat against Hawks chest as he shifted his weight, sitting on his lap. 

“Well Birdy, how do you wanna do this?”

“I mean, being on the bed is a good start…”

“No you dumbass,” Laughed Dabi.

            “Do you wanna top or bottom, I don’t mind either, I mean I usually top but I could be convinced to switch…I just need to touch you” He hummed as he dragged his nails across Hawks chest.

“Oh yea.. um” Hawks paused, his heart leaping into his throat as he looked at the ceiling, his face going bright red.

“Songbird?” Dabi paused, his hands flattening out to gently rest against Hawks hips.

“We don't have to do this if you don't want to. I didn't mean to…” Dabi trails off, self doubt filling him. Did he force Hawks into this? Hawks was probably grossed out. Was it his scars?. Dabi's mind raced a hundred miles an hour as he slowly went to climb off Hawks lap.

“No No it's nothing like that” Hawks exclaimed with a slight panic, his hands pulling Dabi back to his lap. He paused, Hawks entire face was burning red.

“I've just… fuck this is embarrassing. I've never done anything like this… before?” He mumbled, his eyes still avoiding meeting Dabis at all cost.

“What? Really? This is your first time with a dude?” Dabi exclaimed. He didn't mean to sound so surprised but, the number 2 hero? The professional flirt? Had never been with a guy?

“No not just with a guy” Hawks whispered, he looked like he wanted to curl in on himself until the world itself disappeared.

“Birdie, you a virgin?” Dabi asked, surprise lacing his voice.

“Yea…. The commission didn't exactly like letting me out of their sight and dating or hookups were out of the question so…” Hawks shrugged. 

Dabi paused for a moment before reaching a hand out and gently tilting Hawks chin down so their eyes met.

“Songbird, do you want to do this?” He asked, his voice that soft whisper from before that made Hawks heart melt.

“Mhm”

“I need words, Birdy.”

“Yes,” Hawks said before kissing Dabi softly. There's no one else he'd rather have his first time with. He threw his old life away to join the league, but deep down, he threw it away to be near Dabi, he wanted a new start, he wanted to do all the things he could never do, and if one of those things is getting railed by his hot edgy villain friend? Then he was going to do it.

“Alright then Songbird, here’s what we’re gonna do, you're going to leave everything to me, I’ll take the lead and take care of ya’. Any point you wanna stop, just say the word and we will.” Dabi smiled, that sweet smile again. Hawks would trust this man with his life… ironic considering their past. Dabi hooked his fingers into the loops of Hawks pants and worked to pull them off his legs. Hawks lifted his hips so Dabi was able to fully free him, his boxers doing absolutely nothing to hide the shape of his arousal straining against the fabric.

“This hard for little ol’ me Birdy? I’m flattered” Dabi teased, his mouth latching to Hawks exposed collarbone as one of his hands gave Hawks a light squeeze over his boxers. Hawks opened his mouth to reply, but he was only able to muster a whispered whine as Dabi set his mind racing with just a few touches.

“Fuck, your voice Songbird” Dabi groaned as he pulled back for a moment, quickly ridding himself of his own sweatpants. He grabbed Hawks hand and pulled it to feel against the growing bulge in his boxers.

“Feel what you do to me baby?” Dabi asked, Hawks didn’t respond, his hips shifting as he fought to get any friction against the growing desperation between his legs. Dabi smirked. Watching Hawks get so desperate before even getting his boxers off was driving him crazy. Dabi finally gave Hawks some respite, grabbing the waistband of his boxers and pulling them off him, his cock red and the tip wet with precum. 

“Lie back for me okay? I’m going to make you feel so good” Dabi murmured as he tilted Hawks back on the bed before positioning himself between Hawks legs. He leaned over to the nightstand and grabbed the small bottle of lube he kept there for… personal reasons. He quickly discarded his own boxers before pouring some of the lube on his fingers and warming it up.

“This might feel weird at first but I promise it gets better” Dabi said as he dropped his slicked up finger down between Hawks legs, gently circling it around the rim before pushing it in softly. Hawks let out a hiss as his body got used to the strange intrusion. Dabi leaned forward and kissed along his collarbone in apology as he began to work his long finger in and out. He kept going until he was sure that Hawks was ready.

“Shit” Hawks moaned quietly as Dabi slipped a second finger into him, moving them around and scissoring them apart gently, working him open.

“Oh just you wait Songbird” Dabi smirked as he started to move his fingers slightly deeper, moving around, looking for that spot that would make his Birdy see stars.

“Fuck Dabi!” Hawks clenched around his fingers as he moaned loudly.

There it is.

Dabi let out a chuckle as he slipped a third finger into Hawks, loving how the ex-hero had begun rocking back onto his fingers. He kept working him open, making a conscious effort to only brush against his prostate once and a while, as to not end their fun too early, it was the birds first time after all. Hawks moans grew louder as Dabi continued to fuck into him with his fingers, his lips attacking any blank patches of skin across the birds chest, covering him in hickies. They would definitely have some questions to answer from the rest of the league tomorrow but neither of them could care at this moment.

“Dabi, fuck me please, I can’t take it anymore” Hawks whined out, his hand gripping against his partners scarred shoulders.

“Well how could I say no to that pretty voice baby?” Dabi purred out, but his mind was anything but calm. He didn’t realize how much of an effect Hawks voice had on him, he was shocked he didn’t cum right on the spot from hearing him beg, he was even more shocked he had just called Hawks baby. But no time to unpack that right now, right now all he needed was to get inside the stupidly sexy bird hero strewn in front of him. He quickly poured some more of the lube onto his hand, stroking his neglected cock a few times. He locked eyes with Hawks, the ex-hero was breathing heavily, his eyes watching Dabi hungrily, his whole face and neck bright red, besides the patches of hickies that were already starting to turn purple. Every breath seemed to send a quiver through each and every one of the feathers that sprouted from his back.

“Deep breath for me Birdy” Dabi pushed Hawks thighs apart as he lined himself up between his legs and slowly began to push inside. 

“Holy shit”

“You okay? Need me to stop?”

“Stop and I’ll rip your dick off” 

Dabi let out a laugh that quickly tapered into a groan as he bottomed out inside Hawks. He paused for a moment, his thumbs rubbing circles in Hawks hips, in an attempt to give the bird a moment to adjust. Hawks quickly let out a frustrated chirp and began to rock himself back against Dabis cock.

“No fucking patience” Dabi smirked as he slowly started to thrust into Hawks, not wanting to be too rough and hurt the poor bird. He dragged his nails up and down Hawks chest and shoulders, worshiping his toned body and the way his feathers quivered every time he brushed them with his fingers. But it wasn’t enough for Hawks, he wanted more. Don’t get him wrong, he was very thankful that Dabi was being so gentle and patient, but he didn’t want gentle, he wanted Dabi to make sure he never forgot this feeling. He wanted Dabi to make him scream. He rocked his hips impatiently back into Dabi’s thrusts, willing him to speed up.

“More Dabi, please” Hawks pleaded again, in that begging voice that Dabi couldn’t resist.

“Your fucking insatiable” Dabi chuckled darkly.

“Here I am, trying to be a gentleman” He slowly pulled out, until only the tip was still in.

“Be nice and gentle for your first time, but I think you just want me to fuck you into this mattress… isn’t that right Birdbrain” Dabi quickly slammed back into Hawks, yanking his thighs to bring them flush against each other. Hawks let out a choked moan, nodding eagerly as Dabi set a brutal pace, using Hawks hips and thighs to yank him back to meet his thrusts. Moans began spilling out of Hawks mouth completely unashamed, his hands gripping into the sheets for any kind of support as his body shook with each of Dabi’s thrusts. Dabi reached up and grabbed Hawks face, yanking him into a searing kiss, his tongue exploring every inch of the whimpering bird's mouth. 

“Fuck me your tight” Dabi growled against Hawks lips.

“Your jus -fuck- just big” Hawks choked out between his moans, eliciting another laugh from Dabi. He gritted his teeth, still slamming his hips roughly into his whimpering Birdy. Dabi really didn’t want to cum first but fuck did Hawks feel fucking incredible.

“Hey Birdy, roll over for me okay, wanna try something” Dabi said, pulling out and helping Hawks roll onto his stomach, his wings splaying out into the air after being cooped up against the bed for so long. Dabi slowly pushed himself deep back into the ex–hero, Hawks letting out a satisfied coo as he felt himself be filled again, this position making it feel even deeper. Even more intense. Hawks lifted his hips up, leaning forward on his knees, arms folded on the bed, his head resting against them. His ass on full display.

“Fuck Birdy, you’re gonna be the death of me” Dabi growled out as he returned to the brutal pace he had started before. Hawks kept up his chorus of moans, whimpers and chirps as he felt Dabis cock hit his prostate head on, this position making it even harder for him to keep it together.

“Dabi” He stammered through his whimpering tears “Not gonna last”.

“Gonna cum for me Songbird? Need to feel you clench around me, come on baby” Dabi cooed, one of his hands snaking down to Hawks dripping neglected cock, stroking it roughly in time with his thrusts, while his other hand grabbed the base of his wings roughly, his fingers curling and tugging on the sensitive feathers.

“Agh- Fuck Dabi!” Hawks let out a litany of loud moans and whines as his back arched into Dabi’s touch, his climax hitting him at full force, painting his stomach and the mattress with his cum. 

“That's it Songbird, just a little more, you're squeezing me so tight… shit” Dabi gasped out between gritted teeth as he felt Hawks climax rack his body. Both his hands shot to the base of Hawks large wings, gripping them tightly as he hit his limit. He collapsed forward against Hawks back and wings as he came, filling Hawks as deep as he could. Hawks mewling and chirping from the overstimulation. 

They laid there, both desperately trying to catch their breath. Dabi using the last of his energy to pull out, earning him a quiet whine from Hawks, and flop to the side of his sweet, exhausted bird (being careful not to crush his wings).

“C’mere birdy” Dabi mumbled, yanking the tired bird onto his chest, allowing him to nuzzle into the crook of his scarred neck, a hand gently running over his sides and the tips of his wings. The large wings had curled around the two of them, covering them both in a soft red canopy.  

“You good?” Dabi asked, turning his head to press a kiss onto the side of Hawks head.

“Mhm, so good” Hawks sighed, his words muffled by Dabis' shoulder. Dabi lets out a relieved breath he didn't realize he was holding and wraps both his arms around Hawks waist tightly, kissing the top of his head. 

“You know, we still have to cut your hair, Songbird” Dabi mused, resting his head against Hawks’. 

“Can do it tomorrow, don’t wanna move” Hawks whined.

“I have a feeling we’ll be a little busy tomorrow” Dabi smirked.

“Why? I didn't think we had a mission” Hawks asked, suddenly much more conscious.

“We don't, but Birdy, you just moaned on my dick loud enough that I'll be shocked if anyone didn’t hear it. We’re gonna have some questions to answer”  Dabi laughed, rubbing Hawks back as he saw his neck and ears turn red.

“Shit…” Hawks let out a groan. He had forgotten about that… tomorrow was going to be a long day. Dabi let out a laugh, hugging Hawks tightly to his body.

“A problem for tomorrow Birdy, get some rest for now” Dabi sighed, pulling the blanket over the two of them and relaxing back into the mattress, clutching his Birdy closely to his chest. He finally had him, he wasn't going to let him go any time soon.

[joelalorian]

Tides of Desire - Chapter Four: Cut and Run

Pairing: Yacht Captain!Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: TLOU no outbreak AU. Joel Miller is a luxury yacht captain running charters in the Caribbean. You join the crew as a deckhand and unexpectedly complicate Joel's peaceful existence. Basically the TLOU bunch on a Below Deck yacht.

Series warnings: 18+ MDNI, adventure, alcohol, cursing injuries, fluff, angst, eventual smut. Reader is a badass. Joel is Captain Hottie. No use of y/n.

Series Masterlist

Chapter Four: Cut and Run

Wine drunk and worked up, Joel was beyond thankful the captain’s quarters were separate from the rest of the crew. Rock hard and aching for something – someone – he denied himself, his cock was in hand the moment the door was closed and locked. It didn’t take long as pent up as he was, long strokes of his cock with his left hand turned frantic and sloppy. He came hard, rope after thick rope of cum hit the glass door of the shower as Joel braced himself against the wall with his right forearm. Your name fell from his lips when the last rope hit the shower door, sounding more tortured than pleasured.

Quickly showering, the removable showerhead rinsing away the evidence of his lack of self-control, Joel fell into bed feeling all sorts of conflicted. The two of you spent a wonderful evening in the hot tub, sharing stories and more about yourselves. He surprised himself with that confession – he had no intention of saying a word about his attraction and developing feelings, for good reason. It would be so easy to break his own rule and just pursue you during the remainder of the charter season, but recollections from the past prevented him from giving in. Hence why he fled after nearly kissing you.

Joel fell into a restless sleep, dreams plagued with memories he’d rather forget, distorted by his subconscious due to the conflictions weighing him down, you became the specter haunting him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“What the fuck just happened?” Your voice barely registered over the sound of sloshing water left behind by Joel practically throwing himself away from you and out of the hot tub. Head spinning, you stood on shaky legs and slipped out, movements extra careful due to the mixture of wet flooring and amount of wine you drank. Your head was spinning, but not from the wine. Joel confused you.

You were both having a great time, conversation and wine flowing naturally, and the two of you becoming closer physically and emotionally until, suddenly, Joel’s demeanor changed. The eager softness in his eyes flashed away, detachment snapping into its place. He was gone without a word before you knew what was happening.

Exhausted all over again, you dried off and made your way to the crew mess to heat up the dinner Tess left for you. Taking your meal back to your bunk, you quickly changed and climbed into bed to eat. Vacillating between confusion and hurt, you thought it best not to linger in the crew mess in case everyone came back to see you like that.

It was a good decision as the crew returned shortly after you finished eating and you chose to remain in your cabin, the empty bowl placed on the floor next to your bunk. They must have had a fun night, the boisterous noise sounding through the door was filled with shrieks of laughter. You wanted to be happy for everyone, but their merriment was merely a reminder of how uncertain you felt about your own evening.

Knowing your mind would run wild without it, you took a sleeping pill to slow your thoughts. Your body desperately needed the rest anyway.

Sadly, you woke up ten hours later just as perplexed by Joel and his sudden, odd change in behavior. Already awake, Tess turned her penetrating gaze away from her phone as you stumbled out of bed. You grunted out a good morning before locking yourself in the loo. Unable to look at yourself in the mirror knowing you’d be a fright; you scrubbed your face clean and brushed your teeth before scraping your hair back into a messy bun. Finally, you glanced at your reflection. The bags beneath your eyes belied the hours of sleep you got, but it was as good as it was going to get today.

“Everything alright?” Tess questioned when you emerged at last. She could tell that something was off, had known it yesterday, too.

Shaking your head, you murmured, “Everything’s just cracking.” Torn between the need for food and the desire to hide yourself away for the rest of the season, you slumped down onto your bunk with a heavy sigh.

“It’s something to do with Joel, isn’t it?” Tess was too perceptive for her own good, getting right to the heart of the matter. Her feet landed on the floor with a gentle thud next to your bunk before she plopped down next to you. “You don’t have to tell me, but I’m here if you want to talk. I’ve known him for a long time, know how he can be. I’ll keep your confidence, too, if that’s your concern.”

It was, given the closeness of their long-time friendship, but you took Tess at her word, recent events, and your mixed feelings about it all, falling from your lips for the next half hour. Tess listened intently, humming understandingly in spots, until you ran out of breath and words.

“Ugh, fucking Joel Miller,” Tess huffed. “This totally tracks for him. He’s very good at denying himself. He was burned once, it was… well, it changed his perspectives and priorities and for a while that is exactly what he needed. But now he can’t seem to breakout of the rigid morals he set for himself, and he can’t even see that it’s causing more damage than it’s helping.”

Your mind is reeling, trying to figure out what could have burned Joel so bad in the past. You were dying to ask, yet blissful ignorance was looking just as good. The heat of Tess’s gaze burned the side of your face as she watched you. Words failed you as your mind wandered.

“I know you want to ask and that you’re too kind to actually do it,” the older woman said, one hand awkwardly patting your shoulder. “It’s not my story to tell, but I will say this. Joel was reckless once and it bit him in the ass. Nearly derailed his career. In the end, though, it was probably the best thing that ever happened to him.”

Your wide eyes met hers, desperately trying to read the message her gaze was sending. Something reckless. Career almost derailed. Best thing to happen. It had to be something to do with Sarah, right? Something about her mom, maybe?

Tess could see the wheels turning behind your eyes and smiled kindly. “Keep your head up and keep doing your thing. He’s worth the wait if you have the patience. He’ll open up when he’s ready, trust me. I haven’t seen him like the way he is this season in a very long time.”

Questions, you had so many questions, but Tess was not the right person to ask. The answers had to come directly from the source and Tess just basically told you to give him time. Mumbling your thanks, you left the cabin in search of food and fresh air.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A soft breeze with the scent of sea salt wafted across the bridge deck where Joel stood watching most of the deck crew ready the jet skis in the turquoise sea. He often let the crew take advantage of the amenities the yacht offered on their limited time off, provided they cleaned up after themselves and took proper care of all the equipment. Tommy was always one of the first to jump on a jet ski or sea bob and spend hours goofing off under the tropical sun. This time was no different as he readied one jet ski with Ellie on the back while Connor drove the other with Emmy holding tight behind him. Joel’s eyes tracked them zooming across the marina, breaking the soft plains of the water to reach the open sea. Once they were out of sight, his gaze shifted to the sun deck where Sarah, Talia, and Sammy were sprawled out under the sun’s rays.

Your absence was notable.

Were you laying low like he was?

Joel wondered what you were thinking after last night. He had no doubt you were confused – he left you, suddenly and without explanation. His own thoughts were still a jumbled mess, vacillating between self-preservation and wanting to dive headfirst into whatever connection was developing between the two of you. Honestly, he was getting sick of his own thoughts on the matter.

“Hey Texas,” Tess called, snapping Joel from his thoughts. “You gonna join in on the fun today or what?”

Brows pulling together, Joel shook his head. “Not today.”

“Do you enjoy making yourself miserable?”

Joel’s eyes shot to her, wide with surprise. “What?”

Tess shrugged, arms crossed in front of her chest, lips forming a flat line. “Just wondering if you enjoy making yourself miserable since you deliberately make decisions that contradict your own happiness.”

“Are you trying to confuse me with all those words? How, precisely, do I do that – make myself miserable and contradict my own happiness, hmm?” Joel’s eyebrows remained pinched, and he could feel a headache developing in the center of his forehead.

“Oh, come on, Joel. You know exactly what I’m talking about,” Tess huffed in annoyance. “What happened with you and England last night?”

His head jerked back to face the water, “Nothing.”

“Bullshit.” Her narrowed eye stare remained focused on him as Tess continued to pry. “I already know, anyway. You let yourself enjoy time with her and then you fucked it up by running away without explanation. Classic.”

“She told you,” Joel replied, eyes glued to the horizon with an inscrutable expression. “Well, that answers one question about trust.”

“Are you for fuckin’ real, Joel?” Tess snapped, losing her patience, something that rarely happened outside of the galley. “You expect her to unwittingly ride this roller coaster with you, getting whiplash every which way without any explanation from you or anyone to talk to about it? You really are an asshole sometimes.”

She stalked halfway down the bridge deck before Joel responded, voice rough with defeat and regret. “What do you want from me?”

“Same thing you do, Joel. I want you not to be unhappy. You just need to get out of your own way for that to happen.” With that, Tess descended to the lower decks, leaving Joel to stew in his own thoughts once again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tucked away in a shady corner of the sky lounge, you sipped at a diet cola and noshed on pretzels while reading, the sounds of your crew mates readying themselves for an adventure echoed across the deck. You couldn’t bring yourself to join them, not while feeling out of sorts pining over Joel. Besides, you didn’t want to run into him just yet. You were still mulling over the advice Tess gave you.

Space and time.

It was for the best, anyway. You were there to do a job, not get tangled up in feelings for someone who didn’t seem capable of returning them just then.

“There you are!” a sudden, excited voice declared. Looking up, the sight of Sarah’s bright, smiling face met your gaze. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere. We’re going into town for some shopping. Come on!”

The younger woman did not give you a choice, tugging you to your feet and practically dragging you down to the crew deck. “Change your clothes. We leave in ten.”

“Sooo bossy!” you called over your shoulder, slipping out of your loungewear into a pair of soft, worn jeans and a fitted tee. Leaving your hair loose, you perched a pair of shades on your head and exited the cabin to find Sammy, Sarah, Talia, and Tess waiting for you. “Ready?”

“Are we ever. Time for a girls’ day!” Sammy cheered, causing the rest of the group to laugh.

Tess led the way off the yacht, opting to walk through the historic streets of San Juan rather than take an ordered car to the shops. It was a beautiful day, the temperature just right with the sun shining bright overhead. Conversation was easy, flowing from one topic to another without effort. Even Talia, normally mysteriously reserved, was buoyant and talkative. The burdens of confusing feelings weighing you down began to lift, thoughts of Joel fading to the background. There was nothing like some girl time and retail therapy to clear one’s mind.

The afternoon was spent pleasantly perusing the shops and exploring historic sites like La Fortaleza and Castillo San Cristobal. By evening, the five of you settled into a quaint little restaurant for tapas and cocktails.

“Tess said my dad was being an ass to you again. I’m sorry about that. I swear he’s one of the good ones.” Sarah leant into your side, swaying slightly from the buzz of consistently replenishing cocktails.

“There’s nothing sacred on the Radiance, is there?” you laughed. You knew better than to expect privacy on such a yacht, especially when people like Sarah and Tess had a stake in the gossip.

Shrugging unrepentantly, Sarah chuckled. “Seriously though, give him a chance. Okay? He’s worth it, he’s just so out of practice. Not to mention he’s really hard on himself.”

“It says a lot, you know. How the women in his life speak of him.” You met Sarah’s dark eyes with a soft gaze and sighed. “It’s just confusing, is all. But I don’t want to focus on that. I had fun today letting myself be in the moment with you all, so that’s what I’m going to keep doing. Everything else will happen when and if it happens. Yeah?”

“Thatta girl!” Sarah cheered, clinking her half empty glass with yours before downing the rest of the tangy liquid. “We’re definitely going to need a ride back to the yacht.”

The five of you returned to the boat laden with new bags from the Coach outlet along with a pile of souvenirs, feeling refreshed and tipsy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The week passed with another charter for the crew of Radiance. It was the first charter with zero drama from the guests or crew, which was a pleasant change. The primary charter guests were a couple with two young children joined by the grandparents. They were mellow, exhausting themselves with water activities, and went to bed at a very respectable hour every night. Tess was pleased that none of them had crazy dietary restrictions or requests and she was able to really showcase her culinary talents.

You spent a lot of time entertaining the kids, giving the parents and grandparents some time to themselves to relax and even take a day trip or two. There were numerous trips down the slide, the young boys screeching with delight each time, and lots of jumping on the water trampoline. You took them for leisurely rides on the jet skis and taught them how to snorkel, pointing out sea turtles and tropical fish along the way. At Tommy’s insistence, the other deck crew picked up the slack while you played the glorified au pair, though no one seemed to mind.

Those five days were unlike any other charter you worked, spending more time having fun than actually doing anything you would consider work. A few times, you’d look up from whatever you were doing with the kids, eyes sparkling and mouth brimming wide with joy, and catch Joel’s eyes. He watched you with singular focus at times, his dark eyes drinking in everything you did. Given how busy the kids kept you, there were little to no interactions between you and Joel, nor was there energy left to dwell on things. Though you did wonder if you would continue the learning sessions at some point. Time would tell.

Before you knew it, the charter was over, and that wonderful family was leaving. Every member of the crew – even Bill, who shared several deep conversations with the grandpa – were sad to see them go, but none more so than you. The young boys were sobbing as you picked them up for one last hug goodbye. Your fingers smoothed over their blonde locks to sooth them, their mother, Michelle, flashing you a heartwarming smile all the while.

“You have been so good with them, thank you. They are really going to miss you. Maybe we could exchange numbers and connect sometime so they can see you again?” Michelle said. She told you they lived in New Jersey but had a beach house in Florida.

Eyes widening in surprise, you nodded. “Yes, of course! I’d love to see my little mates again. Wouldn’t that be fun?” You jostled the child still in your arms, finally earning a watery smile from the tow-headed boy. With your phone tucked away in your bunk, you gave her your cell number and asked her to text you so you could add her contact later.

Slipping the cell back into her bag, Michelle hugged you tight for several long moments. “Thank you, again, for everything. All of you were amazing, but you really made this special for my babies. You were so wonderful and caring; we’ll never forget it. In fact, let us know what boat you’ll be working on next season so we can plan our trip accordingly.”

It was the highest praise you’d ever received from a charter guest, and it left you feeling a little overwhelmed as tears threatened to spill. You could barely get a sincere thank you out before Michelle moved on with a knowing smile. Your watery eyes briefly met Joel’s and the softness of his chocolate orbs caused the first salty drop to spill over and you quickly turned away to surreptitiously swipe at your eyes.

Needless to say, it was the longest deboarding process you’d ever experienced as it was clear that no one wanted them to leave. It if weren’t for the next charter, Joel could have easily asked them to stay another week. As it was, the crew needed to turn the boat over and get some downtime before moving onto the next one.

Turning the boat over was an exceptionally easy job for once, the guests having been so lowkey and clean, tidying up after themselves despite Sarah’s insistence that they should leave that to her team. Tommy and Connor had kept the deck in pristine condition as well, so the washdown was done in no time. Before long, the crew settled in the main salon for the tip meeting.

“Before we get into the tip, I just wanna thank you all for your hard work. You all made this charter a dream for the guests, and I can’t think of a single thing we coulda done better. Special thanks go to you for bein’ so good with the kids and makin’ the trip fun for them,” Joel said, his eyes locked with yours for a noticeably long time before shifting around to the rest of the crew. “You’ve made me proud and clearly wowed the guests, if the tip is anythin’ to go by.”

Joel handed out the stacks of money to each of the crew and you stared at the wad of cash in your hand. The tip was insane at $3,000 apiece.

“Y’all set the bar high with this one. Let’s keep it up.”

“Well, this certainly calls for celebration!” Tommy announced with a clap of his hands. Turning to Joel, he added, “You should come out with us tonight, brother. At least for dinner. You never go out anymore!”

You watched Joel open his mouth, knowing he would decline, when his gaze flashed to you. His right hand rose to brush the scruff on his chin. “Yeah, alright. I’ll join ya.” Tommy’s joy at the response was infectious and everyone wandered off to start getting ready for dinner.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tess was already showered and rifling through her belongings when you stepped into the cabin. “Oh, I like that,” you greeted, catching sight of the blouse in her hands. “Paired with your black capris and strappy sandals, that would look brill.”

“That is exactly what I was thinking,” Tess chuckled. “What are you going to wear?”

“I’m not sure yet.” Rifling through your own clothes, you grabbed a matching set of undergarments. “Probably a sundress or something.”

Lips forming into a smirk, Tess hummed. “You should fancy it up a little. You do realize you’re the only reason Joel is coming out tonight, right?”

“What?”

Nodding emphatically, Tess smirked. “He never joins the crew on nights out until the last night of the season. This is definitely because of you.”

Again, the roller coaster with him. All week, you focused on being in the moment without worrying about Joel or your growing feelings for him. Now, he was suddenly joining the crew on a night out, something he supposedly never does.

“What do I do? How should I act?” You were starting to panic a little. How were you supposed to maintain the space and time you were giving him if he’s going to be right there?

Seeing the building panic in your eyes, Tess gripped your shoulders. “Relax. Breathe. Just be yourself and enjoy your evening. You don’t need to do anything special or different just because he’ll be there. Ok?”

Head bobbing in some semblance of a nod, you sucked in a deep breath. “Ok.” You had this; it was no big deal. Choosing the cutest sundress in your wardrobe, you topped with a faded jean jacket and finished getting ready – finger combing your locks into waves and dusting on a light layer of makeup.

You were chatting with Tommy and Ellie in the crew mess when Joel walked in, dressed in cargo shorts and a pale green button down, sleeves rolled up on his forearms and the top two buttons open showing the slightest glimpse of his bronzed chest. His thick hair was styled in that effortless way that you know took him a while to get just right. Your mouth dropped open mid-sentence at the sight of him and Tommy nudged your shoulder with a chuckle, using his forefinger to push your jaw closed. You scowled at him before turning your gaze back to Joel.

Joel looked good, too good. You were in trouble tonight and needed to play it cool.

Clearing your throat, you greeted Joel with a quiet, “Hey Cap.” He tipped his head in return, lips quirking up on one side. He clearly caught your initial reaction to the sight of him and you groaned internally. You were off to a great start playing it cool this evening.

The restaurant Tommy chose was within walking distance of the docking slip and the group strolled through the cobblestone streets of San Juan in twos and threes. You wound up walking next to Talia and cherished the opportunity to get to know her a little more. She was reserved yet wickedly funny, her sharp wit the first thing you noticed. The second thing you noticed was that she was acutely observant, as many quiet people are.

“So, you have a thing for the captain, huh?”

You stared at Talia wide-eyed. That came out of nowhere and you stumbled through a response. “Uh, I…how… what makes you say that?”

“I have eyes,” came her simple response.

“Congratulations?” Feeling completely wrong footed in this unexpected conversation, you resorted to snark.

“I don’t mean anything by it, just an observation. It’s clear that he has a thing for you, too,” Talia explained in her naturally even tone. “Neither of you are as subtle as you may like to think.”

“So I’ve heard,” you muttered. “It doesn’t matter though. Nothing will come of it while we’re on the yacht.”

Catching the disappointment in your voice, Talia arched a brow. “Why the hell not? You’re both single, consenting adults, yes?” You nodded and she went on to add, “Well, then what is the problem?”

That was the million-dollar question, right? The hell if you knew what the problem was but it was clear from your interactions with him so far that Joel would not make a move until after the season ended, if at all. You valiantly changed the subject, getting tired of everyone digging into your personal life. Couldn’t you just wallow in your developing desire for Joel without everyone else needing to know the details?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joel stood back, waiting for everyone to find their seats before taking his own at the head of the table. You were seated a few spots down the table between his brother and Sarah, across from Tess. The three of you were already deep in conversation about goodness knows what but his heart swelled knowing that the most important people in his life were drawn to you just as he was.

On the walk from the yacht, Joel decided he would attend not only dinner but also stay out for a couple drinks afterward. He owed you an explanation if for no other reason than to clear the air and a little liquid courage would make that easier.

Dinner passed peacefully. Joel was proud that this season’s crew were all low key without the usual internal drama. Everyone appeared to get along well, and any minor squabbles were handled with care. It was a refreshing change until he realized that the only source of any drama currently happening was himself.

After dinner, for which Joel picked up the tab, Tommy led the way to a nearby open-air bar with live music. It was loud and busy, and the group moved as one to settle in a corner away from the speakers.

“May I buy you a drink?” Joel asked before you could sit down, seizing the opportunity to speak with you.

“Sure. I’ll take an espresso martini, please.” You smiled though it didn’t quite reach your eyes as you followed him to the bar. You were weary and he couldn’t blame you.

Joel turned to you after placing the order with the bartender. “Listen, about last week –”

“Don’t worry about it,” you cut him off with a wave of your hand, eyes shuttered. This was going to be harder than he thought. “We can just forget it… nothing actually happened anyway, right?”

“No can do,” he insisted. “I owe you an apology and an explanation for why ‘nothing actually happened’.” He made air quotes with his fingers.

The bartender delivered the drinks and Joel handed you the martini with a sigh. “Can we go sit over there for a minute? Just to let me get something off my chest?”

Nodding, you followed Joel to a bench off the far end of the bar. It was a quiet little nook where you could actually hear yourself think. You both sat, bodies turned slightly toward each other. He could not stop his eyes from roving over your face, hair, that dress. You looked beautiful and it pained him.

“I want to apologize for that night… for running off without a word.” Joel let his eyes convey the warmth that his words might lack. “I know you feel it, whatever this pull is between the two of us. I can’t keep my eyes off you and at the same time I can’t afford to be distracted during the season. I’m responsible for everyone aboard the yacht and I can’t lose sight of that.”

Your eyes were glassy, reflecting the twinkling lights of the bar as you sipped at your martini. You remained tight lipped, letting Joel do all the talking. He was uncertain if that was a good or bad thing.

“We were having such a wonderful time, talking, getting know more and more about each other as we shared the wine. Alone like that in the hot tub as the sun set and the stars started to twinkle, it was getting intimate. When we started getting closer and the wine hit a little harder, I almost kissed you.”

Your breath hitched at that, and you finally spoke. “And that would have been a bad thing?”

He could not tear his eyes away from your pouty lips. God damn, he was a fool. “Yes. And no. I have no doubt that it would have been a delicious, sweet kiss, but… I have a set of strict rules for myself and one of them is to never get tangled up with a member of the crew during season. In reality, I don’t let myself get tangled up romantically with crew members off-season, either.”

Joel watched you wince then nod, swallowing another sip of your drink. The strong concoction was already half gone.

“So, what, you panicked and ran off?” He couldn’t decipher your tone.

“Exactly. I feared that if I stayed there and tried to explain or pretended that nothing was wrong, I would just give in and kiss you. It was all self-preservation, really.” Joel explained as best he could.

“Hmmm.” He watched you carefully while you mulled over his words. “Sarah and Tess, they both told me that you had a rule like that. They told me to be patient and give you time. Would you really never break that rule?”

Shaking his head with a rye smile, Joel thought he really should have known that the women would spill his secrets in a heartbeat. “I’m not surprised. They are both big fans of yours and keep givin’ me grief about you. I hold myself to a certain standard, ya know? I set specific rules to maintain that standard after learning the hard way what could happen if I didn’t. No one else seems to get that.”

Your pretty eyes took on a faraway look as they shifted away from him. Joel wished he knew what you were thinking. The pair of you sat in an uncomfortable silence – the first one since you met – until you stood suddenly.

“I, er, appreciate your apology and all. It explains a lot.” You paused, gaze skipping around the rest of the bar before meeting his eyes once more. Joel gulped in anticipation of what would spill from your luscious lips next. It was not what he was expecting.

“It seems pointless to let whatever this is fester if you don’t ‘get tangled up’ with crew on or off season,” you blurted, brow furrowed. “I think we should maintain a little distance for the next few charters. Get fresh perspectives and all that.”

“What? No!” Joel called your name, adding,” That’s not…” but you were already striding way. He watched you whisper to Tess, who plopped her drink down on the table and accompanied you out of the bar.

Well, shit. That did not go well.

[yanderes-galore]

Could you please do a short story for Ralph from D:BH with an MC who was attacked by an android in the street, resulting in a scar on their face like his and a subsequent distrust of androids? Love me some mirrored trauma.

Sure! I tried to see what direction I wanted to take this and got this, I hope you like it :) I have never written Ralph before so I hope I got him right. You will now get the big sad.

Not proofread fully so... I apologize in advance.

Closing The Distance

Yandere! Ralph Short

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Stalking, Trauma, Violence, Obsession at first sight, Isolation, Implied kidnapping, Manipulation, Threats, Forced companionship, Clingy behavior, Trust issues, Angst.

Ralph didn't think there was anyone like him. He thought that he was the only one who was burned and scarred, forced to live on his own. He thought all strangers were bad.

Despite his fears, here he hid... watching one in his home carefully. For being a human... you looked so similar to him. You looked scared, alone, betrayed....

Even though you were human you seemed to have a similar trauma to him. Based on the scar across your face Ralph wondered who hurt you. Were they also human? Maybe they were an android?

Despite his fear Ralph continued to look at you, the cold and lost human squatting in his home. Many humans came here to hide. He usually just hid until they left.

That was his intention when he saw you enter. Although now his feelings of fear slowly turned into some sort of... sympathy? He wasn't sure what he felt... but the scar you wore made Ralph curious.

Was it curiosity that kept him staring at you from his hiding place? Is that why he wanted to get closer? Is that why... he wanted to ask questions about your pain?

Ralph has been rather lonely since he ran away. Visitors were always seen as danger.... You may have been the only one he felt curious about instead of outright attacking.

He... wanted to come closer! He wondered if you would hurt him like the others... or stay. Ralph wanted to know more-

*thump*

Ralph wished he wasn't so eager about you as he managed to reveal himself by accidentally pushing a box over...

As a result, his meeting with you became rushed. Is this what he wanted? To meet you?

When Ralph was exposed your "official" meeting with each other became what looked like wild animals circling one another. You're both scared... yet intrigued by each other. You both bear such similar wounds...

Were you meant to meet?

Ralph tried to keep himself calm as you stared st him with the same cautious expression. It was like looking into a mirror. You both keep distance between the two of you in the home... only for Ralph to hear you speak.

"I can leave... please don't hurt me-"

"R-Ralph doesn't usually like visitors... w-will you hurt Ralph?"

There's a silence between you both, the distance between you remaining constant.

"... n-no. Not unless you hurt me...?"

"... you won't hurt Ralph?"

Your eyes catch the blade he subconsciously held in his hand but slowly you shake your head.

"No... I won't. I just need somewhere to stay..."

"Y-You can stay with Ralph... Ralph won't bother you-"

"... Thank you-"

Conversation between you is hesitant and cautious when Ralph first meets you. You both tried to keep your distance throughout the night, allowing each other your space. However... conversation could still be held from across the room.

Which leads to you understanding one another.

It almost seems like you were meant to meet each other. You learn Ralph was hurt by humans, while Ralph learns you were attacked by a deviant. This fact appears to put you more on edge at first due to Ralph being a deviant.

You learn his name, he learns yours. You both talk and soon... you begin to not see him as a threat. In truth... Ralph is just as scared as you. The shared fear makes you become more at ease... as you both don't want to hurt one another if you don't want to.

Soon... the distance closes between you. Ralph can finally indulge his curiosity when you allow each other to sit by one another. He constantly scanned over your scar as if he was unsure that it was real.

Meanwhile you studied the erratic behavior of the android, trying to see how easy it would be ti make him flip. Truthfully... it would take time before you two could trust one another. The unfortunate part was you had nowhere else to go...

Which meant you stayed with Ralph willingly for night after night.

Surprisingly, Ralph was fine with you coming and going. In fact... he felt happy that he found someone like him. As nights went by you two soon were no longer strangers.

You could coexist with one another... maybe even be friends. You became unlikely companions despite your past. Due to your shared trauma... you grew closer.

Ralph actually became giddy when you came by his home again. You both spent your nights trying to understand each other and felt you could trust one another. You are a human Ralph can trust and Ralph is a deviant you can trust...

At least you thought.

Ralph knows he can trust you. In fact, he may even like you too much. The longer you stay with Ralph... the more he insists on you staying. At first... you don't mind the clingy comfort.

It's cute to see Ralph so happy to see you, ranting on and on about you two being family. He doesn't understand what humans eat but tries to feed you anyways. He cares for you more than anyone else has. You really feel like family.

It's when Ralph refuses to see you go anywhere that things become a problem.

You thought you could trust Ralph to be there for you. Normally he's fine with you leaving for the day then coming back at night. Now...

Ralph can't seem to see you go during the day anymore.

"Don't leave Ralph! Ralph will take care of you! Stay with Ralph... p-please!"

"Let me leave, Ralph! I promise I'll come back!"

You weren't sure what triggered it. For some reason, Ralph cornered you when you said you were going to find a job. Was he concerned for you? ... was he lonely?

"Don't leave Ralph! Stay with Ralph! Stay with Ralph or else...!"

Just when you thought you could trust an android...

Your companion pulls a knife on you and pins you to the wall.

"Ralph will make the pain go away..."

He shudders, tracing your scar while looking into your scared eyes. He stares at you with many emotions... ones you can't quite read. Trusting him was a mistake, wasn't it?

"Ralph..."

"Shhh! Ralph will take care of you... and you will take care of Ralph! We... take care of each other. No more strangers. Just you and Ralph."

You want to cry. You want to be vulnerable but now you aren't sure if you can with him anymore. You should have just run...

You should have never met Ralph, he's just like the other androids... isn't he?

You should've just kept your distance and trusted your instincts... but you let your guard down.

Now look where that brought you...

Stuck in a house with an android as your captor... the one android you thought you could trust, threatening you to stay with him. What were you expecting in the end?

"... Ralph loves you."

"Let me go, Ralph..."

"No...Ralph loves you...! You... love Ralph too, right?"

"...."

"... don't you love Ralph?"

You breakdown... as a result, Ralph pauses what he's doing to hold you tighter. If he could cry... you assume he would do it too. You can't live without each other... can you?

Deep down maybe you can't leave him, forced or not. The truth is... Ralph is the only one who understands you.

Even if you could leave him... even if he felt he could let you...

Would you really be able to do it in the end?

[mrvenuspluto]

Oculi mundi

Eyes of the universe

Viewing the world with these eyes, your focus is always on the colors, attractiveness, style and pleasure that the eyes bring. Although we see only 5% of what we project, Hmmmmm...... Yes project! these eyes we use are projectors to are inner thoughts and perceptions also our subconscious views. Our eyes capture light, then turns it into electrical signals and go through a process inside the brain, which analyzes what its seeing. Yes thats what they say happens..... and it could be the case, i truthfully think its more to this phenomenon body we reside in at the moment we are on this realm. Eyes are the black hole where everything goes and come from. Also so much travels through it like a portal, just like space they always trying to understand the black hole or see whats in there. The black hole consist of matter that is tightly squeezed into a small area... hmmmm kinda sounds like something that is inside of us already and how we manifest. All the planets, portals, and lost powers are within us, " AS ABOVE,SO BELOW " . When you open your eyes and let everything in, like tv, negative sights, bad sensory, programming visuals, into your unconscious portal. You are helping calcify your pineal gland or your ( 3rd eye ) . One thing i noticed is people who lost their sight or were born without sight are so talented or let me rephrase that.... they are so gifted or just have strong senses!. Yes i know when a person loses one sense! the other get stronger! But its different than a talent or skill, like when a person has to practice or obtain it from numerous times of repetition. They are tapping into their unconscious natural born gifts, which cant be duplicated. Its when you are limited or cant rely on something everyone uses so easily, you have to go within and gain your natural powers and your true vision. Wonder why? and how? maybe they dont have the light coming through their black holes or portals. So they have everything tight and locked away. Its kinda like when you in a dream but still conscious and able to function normally but cant see the physical world, but you can go within without any distractions or light disrupting your deep thoughts or manifestations. In astrology Venus rules the eyes or eye sight, from the 12th house ( Pisces ) is the left eye. Venus in the 2nd house ( Taurus ) is your right eye. 1st house is ( Aries ) is your head, so much is derived from your brain, its your temple where everything stems from. Just from one thought with great intent you can create a masterpiece. If you ever stared deep into your own eyes through a mirror, you can see deep into your own soul and if you stare long enough you wont recognize yourself. You start to question who am i ? is this really me? like this soul doesn't resonate with this new body or image. You are a image of your imagination you created and constructed through your desire and manifestation. We all came from darkness and light shines upon us. We all rely on our sight than any other senses, and thats the reason we cant tap into our past life powers or true gifts. Yes its nice to see beautiful things, nice scenery, colors, food, and people! Or its our perception that creates these images we see ? How you feel is what you manifest, which is how you create. If you want to see something scary and thats always on your mind, conscious or subconscious you will manifest those images and create them into reality to take place in this realm. You are the writer, illustrator, director, and camera man or woman in your own head or mind. Try this one day when you wake up, just before you open your eyes, get up or on your phone or stress your brain about lifes problems or issues. Close your eyes lay back down, like you trying to go back to sleep, just relax, imagine how you want your day to play out. All the beautiful things you want to see, experience and enjoy. Don't have not one doubt, or even a pinch of negative thought in your mind, Now open your eyes with excitement, like its your first time in this body and on this realm.

You will start to see the artist, writer director and camera man or woman go to work! ( YOU )! We know nothing is forever and we have to go through loses, misfortunes, ups and downs. How would you know what BLISS is if you never experienced MISERY! how would you know what HAPPINESS is if you never went through SADNESS!. Thats why Pisces represents BLISS, HAPPINESS, with one self, loving, accepting all things as they are with no judgement. When you have that mindset and beautiful thoughts, you manifest, create those images in your brain and your eyes become the projector to create that movie for you. Same as a Taurus the sign of all 5 senses. When you want to see beautiful colors, pleasure to the eyes, you tap into your more earthy lower nature, to physically, create these things. So you can touch, taste, smell, hear, and see them. Also Taurus can make you fixed on what you see, feel, taste, hear and smell, with only relying on the physical aspect other than the imagination side as in Picses. As a Pisces deals with dreams, illusions, and the ether realm and the unseen. So you can close your eyes and just image all those great things, without having to physically touch, materially create them or see them with your actual eyes. As in for Taurus, needs things that are tangible, physically, practical to the eye. When both eyes or both sides of the brain are linked you create heaven on earth!. Thats why Venus is the creative planet or energy that helps you be a artist, from creating with your imagination, dream, to being a chef that can turn food into a work of art physically. When those two signs are linked its nothing but straight artistry and pure gifts. You are able to experience the earthy, material and tangible side of life, as well you are able to experience the more spiritual, blissfulness, and higher conscious side of your soul. You become a very divine soul with so much insight and perspectives on both sides of this experience. So many people or souls have this experience confused, its not about being becoming a monk, shaman, priest, super religious person or a guru who doesn't accept life on earth. Its all about the experience and knowing how to experience, learn, gain knowledge, let go, and know whats good and bad for you. As you move on to a higher consciousness experience, higher self with more wisdom, accept all your convictions, decisions in life and cherish your experiences here on earth, you can welcome your soul back here to experience more desires your eyes could never get enough of or let those desires go and let your soul ascend to a more powerful divine realm that is multifaceted with unlimited outcomes and special inner peace.

[thecameronchronicles]

Next Door Nightmare

TW: Sociopath/Psychopathic tendencies. Language. Smut. Dark Trevor!

SUMMARY: Your next door neighbor, Trevor, pays you a visit on Halloween, harboring quite dubious intentions…

WORD COUNT: 1900

*Requested*

The last piece of candy left your fluorescent orange bowl as you’d breathed a sigh of relief that another Halloween night had come to pass. It wasn’t that you hated All Hallow’s Eve, in fact, you adored the satire and aesthetic behind it all, but you hated how eerie it felt within this apartment since your boyfriend and you had split six months prior as he had left nothing more than a post-it note on the bathroom mirror of a simple ‘I’m done’ left for you to find. For this, you looked forward to no longer having to feign smiles and slip into bed, falling asleep to some vintage horror movie marathon as the flash of poorly constructed death scenes were enough to bore you to sleep. 

And that was just what he was waiting for…

Ever since you had moved in with your boyfriend, he was captivated by you. The way your beauty seemed incomparable to those he’d met between one night stands and former relationships holding any semblance of longevity. The eloquence of your academic repertoire and your wisdom whenever your lips would part. Even the way you’d drift absentmindedly as you would be waiting for the mail or the bus, whose stop was just outside the complex. But this obsession had worsened since your boyfriend’s absence. And yet, despite the need to be near you, he had yet to do anything beyond a few waves and glances, making you understand that he was just your next door neighbor, unaware how he wanted to be so much more. 

You shifted beneath your sheets, his feet stilling at the center of your room, licking his lips as a nervous tick, until he continued forward. The outline of your body was visible in the thin sheet, pulled slowly from you by his own direction in order to see the crop you’d left as a minimal covering and plaid pants that accentuated your curves without much effort. He had never been this close to you, and he basked in the thrill of this moment. The distant scent of coconut from your shampoo and vanilla from your body wash, the tempting part of your lips making him wonder how you tasted, and the final beckoning of your legs pulling into a part with the newfound chill of a distant blanket sending you to adjust for a replacement subconsciously. 

This had been his final straw. Whatever reservation he had until this moment had been forcefully withdrawn at the revelation of this new sight. The soft skin of your thighs summoned him closer, and his fingers began to trace you with their backs alone. His breath hitched as he inched closer to those shorts, wondering how melodious you would sound once he had you on that cusp. Just within reach, he would bask in the way you were unaware of him until he wanted you to be, a high that exceeded anything prior to you-anyone prior. 

“Mmmm…” You moaned to the brush made over your clothed clit, your legs pressing together as this simple touch had your dream suddenly shift from innocent to carnal, the thoughts of your most sinful desires now broadcast within your REM state. Ones worsened by that pressure between your legs now building, but still not enough for you to differentiate between fantasy and reality. 

Meanwhile, he became entirely intoxicated by the soft breaths made while you lay remaining in your slumber, your body reacting to his traces and his own lips parting in the anticipation and eagerness of what ran through his own mind. His patience thinning to each motion made by your body, every rise of your chest, he had reached his limit. Withdrawing his touch, he watched you seek for it with your fingers, a smirk developing in the flickers of Psycho playing in black and white against him from the tv remaining on. 

But it would be the sound of your voice speaking that name that would bring his caring touches into ones of possession. It was a name that didn’t belong to him, a name he wanted you to forget, a name he wanted and intended to replace-the name of your ex…Because of this, you would be forced awake by a sudden grip around your throat applying just enough pressure for you to be shot to reality. Your eyes would adjust to the darkness almost immediately as you looked upwards to make out the silhouette leaning in to you. 

“Trevor?” You whimpered out, needing to hear his voice for a validation that this wasn’t a part of your dream suddenly made dark. 

“That is the ONLY name you’re going to say from now on…” He leaned over you, pulling himself into a straddle until you were unable to move, his hands pulling your hands over your head. 

“In pleasure…and pain…” Your eyes widened as you watched him remove his own shirt, your body attempt to flee before you were pinned once again. 

“Please-”

“He never deserved you…he didn’t know how to treat you…”

“Please…” You whimpered, “Please don’t…” You shook beneath him as he gathered your wrists beneath one of his hands as the other traced your cheek, brushing away the tear as he smiled. 

“Just when I think you can’t be any more beautiful…you even cry beautifully…” He now removed his belt, using it to bind you to the headboard as you shifted beneath him. 

“But I want your entire body to cry for me…Your skin…your pussy…” He scoffed, brushing his fingers over the fabric soaked by his former touches as he breathed deeply in admiration. 

“I know you faked it with him…I could hear you through the walls…when he’d go to work, you’d use your little toys-the real screaming and whining-but you won’t need toys with me, baby…I’m more than enough…” You were taken further down onto the bed, his fingers pulling your shorts from yoru body and leaving only your lace panties as a barrier between your sex and him. 

Whether it was from fear or intrigue, you couldn’t bring yourself to do anything but stare at him. As he had watched you for the last year and a half you’d been in this apartment, you had now watched him, taking in every motion as if there would be a test, wondering just what it was he would do next. 

“You behave and I won’t have to hurt you-”

“Trevor, please…” He sucked a breath into the sound of his name from your gasp. 

“The next time you say my name will be out of pleasure…but you say it before hand, and I’ll bring a pain you’ve never fucking imagined…” He breathed against your cheek as he withdrew his own bottoms, nearly bare with only his boxers keepin him reserved, before he moved between your legs. You had attempted to kick him away, a quick apprehension of your thighs allowing him the chance to control you, as he kissed your thighs. 

“I swear to whatever you believe in, I’ll be all you need…Just like you are for me.” You wanted to scream and claim he was insane because you had only ever spoken a handful of words to one another in order to recite such words with such devotion. And yet, the sudden heat of his breath between your folds sent your body in betrayal of your fear as his tongue rushed to collect his prize. 

“So sweet…Fuck…” He breathed against you as you moaned for him, his hand reaching upwards to your chest and pinching your nipples left hard from his former actions. 

“I will cherish you…I will take care of you…I will make you come…like he never could…” And to this, he brought you to that bitter edge, the saccharine sweetness behind your reserve as a harsh slap to your pussy would pull you to a gasp. 

“Don’t hold back…I don’t want to hurt you…but I will…” He returned between your thighs, pulling your legs over either of his shoulders before savoring that release you had denied forward, its presence coming to you in waves as your eyes opened to find him preparing himself for you, taking your slick and coating his cock before looking to you with victory. 

“No…Watch me…Watch us…Watch!” He snapped finally as your eyes came to a close, shooting open to his raised tone. And you had no choice, he was suddenly inside of you, the width of his cock incomparable as your body clung to him, the belt clinging against the headboard as he grunted over you. 

“Is this okay?” You narrowed your eyes. NONE of this was okay and yet he had the audacity to ask. 

“Is this speed alright? Want me harder?” You could only look away from him, something he forced into submission as you looked at him with his grip on your jaw. 

“Next time it’ll be better…just gotta get you used to me…Fuck…it’s like you were made for me though…sucking me in like this-shit!” He belted over you, his muscles contracting over you as you hated how you were aroused by their flex. But everything making up his body was arousing, each line and each cold word sweetened by his version of care. 

“If you fight it this time, you’re not gonna like me-” You clenched your jaw. 

“I don’t.”

“It’s okay…you will…” He was steadfast in his devotion as you whimpered to his quickening succession, his finger to your clit driving your body into a confusing pleasure. 

“Say my name for me…Come on…” You only clenched your jaw tighter, his grip to your cheeks forcing them hollow as you winced from the pain. 

“Say it-” He demanded as you breathed sharply as his hand now lowered to make a threat against your neck. “Say it or you won’t say anything-”

“Trevor…”

“Not in pain. I know you feel good-we both know it does…fucking say it like you want to, not like you’re fighting it…Say it so I can come…Say it for me…Sing it for me…” You bit the inside of your lips closed as he moved faster, that release coming closer and closer despite your attempts otherwise as it came over you once again. Only now, when your body settled in the recent tremors, he would increase his speed to build to his own release, wanting you to savor your own before enduring his. 

“I want you to feel all of it…all of ME…To get used to it, baby…” You focused on him, clenching around him in the hopes it would deter him, but it only forced his mouth apart in pleasure. 

“Do that shit again-right fucking now…ahh…” Your body obliged despite your reservation as he growled and grunted to that release, your body melting into his and arching as a third orgasm washed through you, surprising you both by friction alone. 

“I swear to you that I’ll never leave you…” He kissed your forehead as you watched him untie your hands. 

“Especially not with an “I’m done’ written on a fucking post-it note.” Your eyes widened in complete horror to the man infatuated with you. He knew a detail you’d never spoken to anyone, suddenly leaving you to question if your boyfriend’s abandonment was of his own doing…

Taglist: @hopebaker @iovdrew @penny4yourthoughts @magnificantmermaid @pickingviolets @lovedetlost @trikigirl271 @my-baexht-ls @slut4starkey @slvtherinseeker @obxiskewl @obxxrxfes @bluesongbird @slut-era @ailee-celeste @rafesbae

[thenovelartist]

Life After Destruction - Chapter 2 - Honkai: Star Rail

<Previous Chapter ~ Next Chapter>

For the first time in a while, Stelle could say she was genuinely, truly happy. Incredible what a short yet long-overdue talk between her and her husband could accomplish. Honestly, she was just glad that it was so easily worked out. Maybe they both needed to make an effort to communicate more in order to make this weird transition from what could only be described as a battle for life itself to rebuilding a normal, peaceful reality. But a normal, peaceful reality trailblazing with Dan Heng? That sounded like a dream come true to her.

As of now, she was in their room, turning the little square of wrapped candy in her hands. According to Bailu, she had added the medicine to a candy because she was worried about how bitter the taste was and this was the solution her assistant had given her. However, Stelle had to wonder if the assistant’s true intention behind that suggestion had just gone straight over Bailu’s innocent head.

Probably, since she didn’t blush in the slightest when she told them to break the candy in half and each eat a dose.

With a sigh, she set the candy down on the nightstand and plopped down on the edge of the bed. She toyed with the bottom hem of the dress she’d put on for the evening: a teal one with white lines highlighting certain seams, a golden dragon motif painted on one side, and a high neck that matched the Luofu style. It also hugged the lines of her body tighter than what Stelle was used to, hence why she only wore this dress on very certain occasions. 

She subconsciously tugged the hem down lower over her thighs, as though it wasn’t already as low as it could go. Maybe it was because she felt as though the lingerie she’d specifically put on for the night—a black pair with red lace that Himeko had all-too-proudly gotten Stelle as a “wedding gift”—could be seen through the dress itself.

Ugh, she felt so stupid. She’d been married to Dan Heng for years, and yet here she was, nervous as though it was their first night together again.

“Come on, pull it together,” she quietly warned herself as she stood back up and paced the room again. “You wanted this. Woman up.”

With that pep-talk over, she looked at herself in the mirror once more. Tonight was a rare occasion that she wore her hair up, pinned in place by a very lovely pair of decorative hair sticks Dan Heng had given her before they’d gotten married. She didn’t wear them nearly as much as she’d like to as she was always afraid to tarnish the gold or ruin the delicate silk waterlilies. While Dan Heng had gotten her other, less flashy ones that she felt slightly more comfortable wearing out and about, these were her absolute favorite.

The door suddenly opened, and Stelle whipped around just in time to watch Dan Heng freeze in the doorway.

Well, too late to turn back now. So she stood tall with as much shaky confidence as she could muster. “Hey.”

Slowly, as he regained his senses, he shut the door behind him. He slowly ran his other hand over his jaw, as though unsure what else he could do.

Under his intense gaze, she once again found herself tugging at the hem of her dress.

“It’s been so long since I’ve seen you dressed up like this,” he finally spoke, his voice gentle. His hand fell away from his lips, revealing a sweet smile that convinced her it was okay to relax.

“Do you like it?” she shyly asked.

“Of course.”

Finally, Stelle felt the tension in her shoulders disappear.

Dan Heng was the first to move, closing the distance between them. “You’re wearing the hair ornaments I gave you.”

“They’re my favorite.”

His eyes took on a happy glimmer as he reached up to toy with one of the dangling bead strings. “I’m glad. They suit you.”

“I know you always say that, but I still don’t see it,” she said. “They’re only my favorite because they remind me of you.”

“Precisely.” He then ran his hand down her arm, taking hold of her hand and raising it to his lips. “You are mine.”

Warmth crept up her neck to her cheeks. Ah, there was his territorial streak, the one she found incredibly attractive. Whether it be in the subtle things, such as the way he held her close in crowds, or the more notable things like decorating her, she would frequently find herself swooning for those little possessive maneuvers.

And that was only because she felt the same way and was glad to return the favor. He was hers as much as she was his.

“I love you.” The words tumbled from her lips automatically, but she only grinned wider upon having said them.

A sparkle seemed to dance in his blue-gray eyes at her confession. “I love you, too.” And with that, he leaned forward to kiss her.

Much to her dismay, he kept it brief, pulling away far too soon for her liking.

“Let’s go on a date.”

The words caught her completely off guard. “Huh?”

“You said you thought I was distant. And we haven’t gone on a date in…” He paused, a sheepish grimace crossing his face. “Even before the war.”

“It hasn’t been that long, has it?” she asked, trying to think back. Only, she grew more and more horrified as she realized their last official date was, in fact, three months before the war. And it was a picnic of snack food and stargazing, which only lasted an hour. “No, you’re right, it has,” she relented, covering her face with her hand.

A strained chuckle escaped him. “It’s been… a chaotic year.”

“You could say that again.”

“So let’s fix that. I know what I promised you tonight, but… after everything that’s happened, I want tonight to be more than just sex. So, Stelle, will you give me the chance to woo my wife again?”

Her heart drummed inside her chest, and she had to focus on not letting her knees cave out from under her. Aeons, who taught him these lines? She wasn’t going to be able to focus on the date if her husband was already flirting with her like that. “She would really like that. Does the husband have something planned, or is he going to let his wife drag him around tonight?”

“My original plan was to go to Aurum Alley,” he answered. “To get share a dessert and look at the night markets. But if you don’t like that idea, I’m happy to follow your lead.”

“Honestly, a classic, boring old dessert date after everything that’s happened sounds pretty magical to me.”

He looked relieved by her answer, meaning that, despite its simplicity, he’d given much thought to this date of theirs. “Then would you like to change into something you’re more comfortable in?”

She frowned in confusion. “This is fine.”

“The way you’re pulling at the hem suggests otherwise.”

Darn it. She’d been caught.

“But, don’t you like this dress?” she asked.

“Yes, but I don’t see a reason for you to walk around in something you’re not comfortable in.”

She sighed. Darn him and his observant nature and his thoughtfulness. She was trying to make an effort here, and she wasn't about to let him ruin it. “It’s not that I’m uncomfortable in it. It’s just… been a while since we've done anything like this, so maybe I’m a little nervous for the evening.”

Dan Heng gently squeezed her hands. “I am, too,” he admitted. “It’s been so long. But I’m excited for something normal again.”

She couldn’t deny that. “Yeah, I know what you mean. But we should warn someone before we—”

“I told Welt we would be out late tonight and to not bother staying up for us,” Dan Heng said. “He bid us a good time.”

“Well, with his blessing, we should get going.”

“Lets.”

~~~

She was beautiful. There wasn’t ever a time she wasn’t, but Stelle was particularly stunning tonight. Dan Heng was more than happy to escort this woman around the night market.

“Hey, they finally have some Puffergoat Belly Bliss.”

He blinked at her sudden outburst. Next thing he knew, she’d taken his arm and began dragging him over to a stall, one that boasted a long line.

“It’s so rare they have it,” she said, proudly taking her spot at the back of the line. “And when they do, we’re always off elsewhere.”

“But it’s not your favorite dish.”

“Yeah, but it’s yours, isn’t it?” she shot back with a knowing grin. “Besides, it’s not like I don’t like it. I just happen to have a few other desserts that top it.”

He gave a slight chuckle. “Just a few,” he teased.

She narrowed her eyes at him in warning, but the smirk she was failing to suppress told him there were no hard feelings.

He slipped his arm around her waist, bringing her a half step closer.

She reached over to pat the hand he had on her hip.

Mine. The word rang through his head as he looked down at the stunning woman snuggled up to his side. This is mine. And what an honor and blessing that was.

Even though the line was moving at a good pace, they still had plenty of time to stand and admire the night market. This might have been Dan Heng’s homeworld, but he would admit that it didn’t quite have the same shine to it unless Stelle was with him. He was never one for bustling places, but she was able to look beyond that and enjoy it anyway. Meaning he was able to enjoy it, too.

After they obtained their dessert, they managed to find an empty bench a little off the beaten path. It was there they sat and enjoyed their food together. As always, Stelle reached over to steal a bite of his. He could have stopped her, but he would rather guilt her into allowing him to return the favor. It had taken him some time to get comfortable with Stelle’s little routine, but now, it was a game he’d simply come to accept as normal.

The night was passing quickly, and before Dan Heng knew it, they’d been there for an hour and a half. After they’d enjoyed a treat, they’d done some window shopping, meandering around the markets hand in hand. For the first time in too long, nothing was looming above their heads; no stellaron crisis or world disaster or promise of doom’s day. It was just peaceful.

“There’s so many people out and about,” Stelle commented. “Like, more than normal.”

“The Luofu alliance did help us immensely in our fight against Nanook,” Dan Heng said. “While they suffered heavy losses, that was the price they paid for securing the future generations. There are many families here, so it seems as though the people are still celebrating the prospect of peace rather than suffering in mourning.”

“That’s understandable,” she said, curling her arms around one of his. “Knowing you can live in peace with the ones you love would be cause for celebration.”

His heart warmed at her words, and he couldn’t help but squeeze her hand in agreement.

“Kids! Slow down!”

Their attention turned to a woman calling out to a gaggle of children barreling down the street, her attempts at wrangling them clearly unsuccessful. Yet, even Dan Heng didn’t fail to see the pure joy on the young children's faces as they raced their kites down the alleyway. Until they suddenly ran into a couple whose backs had been turned.

The man turned around first. Dan Heng noticed his ears, ones that proved him to be vidyadhara, but the woman he was with was clearly a foxian. The children cowered in apology, but neither of the couple seemed to mind, instead bending down to talk about the kites the children were playing with.

By now, the mother of the children had caught up, bowing in apology before yelling at her children to do the same. In turn, the couple just laughed it off in dismissal. Dan Heng knew he shouldn’t stare, but he couldn’t help but watch as the children ran off again and the inter-species couple dropped their smiles. The woman in particular had a look of pain on her face Dan Heng couldn’t ignore.

For some reason, Bailu’s words came back to his head about those in interspecies relationships struggling to conceive, but how much harder was it for this foxian to know this man she was with, the one who was tenderly embracing her, would never be able to give her children from the start? Was it easier to accept that fact upfront rather than getting into a relationship only to learn later?

“I bet you could have wrangled them,” Stelle commented, bringing him back to reality.

It took him a second to realize she was talking about the unruly children. “What makes you say that?”

“You’re really good at leading and teaching kids,” she said. “And you’re a really good big brother to Bailu. She highly respects you, you know. It’s adorable.”

“I could say the same to you regarding Clara and Hook. And they both adore you.”

She shrugged. “I suppose.”

Unable to pull himself away from his previous thoughts completely, he gave her hand a squeeze. “Hey.”

“Yeah?”

The question stuck on his tongue for a moment. “I know… it’s a little late to be asking this question, but do you… want children?”

She froze momentarily, caught off guard by the question. “I mean, it’s a pointless question because your race can’t. And I’ve sometimes wondered if I even could. This stellaron had affected me in ways that I can’t even begin to describe, so what if I’m equally infertile?”

“But… hypothetically.”

She pursed her lips in thought. “Honestly, I don’t know what I want. The world just got put to rights, and I finally feel like the future has opened up to me. So, I never considered it before, mostly because I never had the chance to.” She then looked up at him curiously. “What about you? What’s your thought on kids?”

He shrugged. “I’ve always known I could never have any. That was simply a fact, but it never bothered me seeing as I never believed I’d belong anywhere or have a family, and I certainly never thought I’d have a wife,” he finished.

“And hypothetically?”

He should have known she’d return his questions. “I don’t know, but… at the moment, it doesn’t sound like a horrible prospect.”

At his confession, she slowed her pace, just for a step or two, before she gave him a sympathetic expression. “Maybe we can be like Welt and Himeko and just adopt whatever young adventurer next comes on the train.”

A mirthless chuckle escaped him. “I guess so.”

“But until then, I’m happy with you.” She snuggled up to his side. “More than happy.”

His heart swelled with affection, and suddenly, the alley felt far too crowded for his liking. “Stelle.”

“Hmm?”

“Would you like to go back home?”

He couldn’t tell in the lantern lighting, but he was pretty sure her cheeks gained a slight rosy tint as her eyes sparkled with adoration. “I thought you’d never ask.”

~~~

The moment their bedroom door was shut, the thread of anticipation that was strung between them snapped. In an instant, Stelle found herself pinned up against the door, her vision full of Dan Heng and Dan Heng alone.

The only reaction appropriate was to throw her arms around his shoulders, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt as she clung to him, and kiss him. Over. And over. And over.

The way he ran his hands up her sides was killing her, but it was the way those same hands trailed down her sides until they hit her thighs that felt electric.

“I love you.” The words tumbled out of her in between kisses.

“I love you, too,” he returned, their lips only a hair’s width apart. “So much.”

Before Stelle could close that distance—if you could even call it that—Dan Heng grabbed her thighs and lifted her up.

She gasped in surprise, her legs automatically wrapping around his waist to stabilize herself just as her back hit the door again.

And he had the audacity to chuckle.

“You think you’re so slick,” she muttered.

“Didn’t you say you missed this?” he asked, his kisses now peppering her jaw.

Huh? What was he…

Oh. She… she supposed she did. And he’d remembered.

Which once again begged the question of how did he get so good at flirting? He was so awkward at the beginning. 

“You spoil me,” she moaned, squeezing him tighter with her legs.

She was rewarded with a sharp intake of breath on his part.

But that wasn’t enough of a reaction for her. “What do you want from me?”

“Huh?” His response came out as a hot puff of breath under her jaw.

She shivered, her body growing more sensitive with every passing second. “What do you want from me? A-as a reward for spoiling me.”

He paused, his breathing heavy as he pulled back, allowing her to see the already hazy look in his eye. “You.”

“Me?”

“You. I’m not picky.”

“You’re not making it easy on me,” she muttered, loosely running her fingers over his shoulder blades.

He shuttered at her ghost of a touch. “I could say the same.”

“That’s kinda the point?”

He huffed. “You want an answer?”

“Yes.”

“I want you out of that dress,” he growled, pushing her even harder against the door. “Or I will ruin it.”

She was going to lose her mind under this pressure. “If it made you happy,” she huffed out, struggling to keep her mind focused on teasing this man. “I’d let you.”

“If you like it at all, don’t give me the option.”

“Lucky for you, I like you more than this dress. I only wear it because it represents you.”

There was a dangerous glint in his eye at her words.

And she was stupid enough to want to play with it. “So, what do you want now?”

Slowly, painstakingly slowly, he ran his hands from her knees up her thighs, then let her slip back down to the floor, his fingers sliding the hem of her dress upwards.

She liked where this was going.

Even when she stood back on the floor, his hands didn’t stop their upward travel, raking over her rear end, applying just enough pressure to keep her flush against him as he pulled her away from the door. From the small of her back, up to her shoulders, then walking up her neck to find the zipper.

She was grinning like a fiend at this point. Oh, so he wanted to play the torment game? Well, two could play at that.

She slid her hands over his shoulders, slowly sliding them down his chest—a very toned one that she appreciated accordingly—and reached for his shirt’s hem.

But the moment her fingers slipped below his belt, he suddenly yanked her zipper down, shucked the dress off her, then threw her over his shoulder in one swift motion.

She squealed in surprise, not expecting to be picked up like a sack of potatoes before being thrown onto the bed. Yet, she couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity of it. Her own fault, though, for playing with fire. Imaginary fire, but fire nevertheless.

He was hovering over her now, straddling her to ensure she couldn’t move as he shed his shirt, revealing his battle scars in the process.

Her laughter died down as he grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head. Her focus was now elsewhere. Namely, the angry red scars that ran down his arms and curved over his shoulders. Wounds he took for her in the war.

Suddenly, she was a million miles away, watching as a metal monster swung its claws around aimlessly, ripping through everything in its path whether it be fortresses or people—

“Stelle.”

At the sound of her name, she blinked rapidly as the scene around her changed and she returned to reality.

And reality was her husband still had her pinned to the bed.

The fire that had been in his gaze had died down, a worried expression filling them now. “I lost you there,” he muttered, his thumbs rubbing little circles on her wrists in comfort. “What’s going on in your head?”

“Nothing,” she dismissed, her heart now racing uncomfortably in a way not caused by her husband.

“Dissociating is not nothing,” he countered, not letting it go. “Is it about your scar?”

Her scar?

Only once she looked down at her own chest did it click in her mind. Oh… she supposed it was on full display now. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen it before, but it was a new addition to her body since the last time they’d been intimate. Him catching sight of it while she changed was something she was already used to, but at his words, she slowly became hyperaware of how ugly it must be, and how there was no lingerie pretty enough to distract from that scar.

She must have taken too long to answer because he let go of her wrists, hands trailing down her arms before curling around her back. He lowered himself over her, embracing her fully as he began lavishing the disaster of a scar carved into her chest with kisses.

“I love you, my starlight,” he whispered, holding her tightly against him, skin pressed against skin. “And no scar in the world will change the fact that I’m so thankful you’re still alive and here with me.”

The slight warble of emotion in his voice struck a chord in her, her heart racing all the faster for it. And as he continued his ministrations against her scar, she caved to the heat of the moment, her eyes drifting shut as she let her head fall back against the bed. Her arms snaked around his shoulders, she curled her legs up around his waist, and she used every bit of leverage available to arch her back, pressing as close to him as she could possibly get.

“I love you, Dan Heng,” she breathed out, tears beginning to form in her eyes as the emotions welling up in her began to overflow. Allowing herself to get swept up in the fluttery, ethereal feelings that only got worse as her husband tightened his grip on her, holding her ever closer, her hands soon raked up his back and threaded into his hair at the nape of his neck. “I love you so much.”

~~~

Dan Heng was perfectly and utterly content.

However, the way Stelle was ghosting her fingers over his arms, her brow knit together intently, told him she was not.

Meaning Dan Heng could not, in fact, be perfectly content.

“Enough of that,” he whispered, reaching up to gently rub his finger in between her eyebrows, hoping both to distract her and smooth out the wrinkle formed by her worrying. “What’s going on through your head now?”

“You have scars, too.”

His brow furrowed in confusion. “And?”

She glanced up at him, allowing him to fully catch that sad glint in her eyes before she turned her attention back to the scars on his arms. “Thank you for protecting me.”

“Always. But where did this come from?”

“Can I put some of the healing cream on it?”

“Slow down,” he said, not able to keep up as she bounced between each comment. “Why? Do they bother you?”

She shook her head, finally looking up at him again. “Not that they bother me. But that I’ve been so focused on myself that I—”

“Stop that,” he cut in, distracting her this time by gently stroking her hair back behind her ear and then not bothering to remove his hand from where it landed on her jaw. “You are not selfish for not fussing over my scars. They are nothing compared to your injuries. I was released and got my stitches out before you even came out of your coma.”

“Can’t I fuss over my husband?”

“You don’t need to. I’m fine.”

Her little grumble and pout told him that was not the answer she wanted to hear.

He sighed. “There is nothing to fuss over. I’m healthy. The scars don’t bother me.”

“I know, but…” She traced the scars she could see once more, and he suppressed a shiver. Even after everything they'd done that night, he was still hyper-sensitive to her touch. “I still want to put some salve on your scars. It’s not fair if I’m the only one getting treated when you’re hurt, too.”

“But didn’t Bailu make that salve specifically for you? She’ll begin to wonder why you went through it so fast.”

“You know she won’t mind if I tell her why. She cares for her big brother, too, you know.”

“I do.”

She looked up at him inquisitively. “So?”

Dan Heng sighed. Her persistence was admirable but unnecessary in this situation. However, she didn’t seem to want to drop this topic, so there really was only one thing he could say. “Alright.”

The lingering worry on her expression disappeared as a grin split her face. Next thing he knew, she practically sprung out of bed, dropping a kiss to his lips as she crawled over him. “Thank you.”

“For what?” he asked, slightly amused as he watched her snatch his shirt from the floor and slide it over her toned body.

Aeons, he’d forgotten what she looked like in his clothes. Worse yet, he’d forgotten how much he loved it.

“Letting me care for you,” she said, pulling on her underwear bottoms as well seeing as his shirt wasn’t quite long enough to fully cover her. “Even if it’s late.”

Geez, he could not figure this woman out sometimes.

She was back almost as quickly as she left, and he sat up against the headboard of their bed as she plopped down on the edge, the little jar of salve in her hands. Sparingly, she took some salve from the jar and began applying it on the angry red scars that he now sported on his shoulder. His guess of her next target would be the one on his right arm from where he was impaled by a spear. The war against Nanook had not been easily won, the broken skin on his body a testament to that, but he was thankful he walked away with his life.

To distract himself from those memories, he looked at his wife, who wore an intent expression as she applied the salve with the most tender of touches. He half expected her to kiss those scars once she was done, but on the other hand, they had just done quite a bit of kissing.

“Turn around,” she instructed before adding on at the end, “Please.”

He did as instructed, turning his back towards her. Even with the help of a mirror, he couldn’t see the scars back there very well, so those really didn’t bother him, even though getting torn up by the claws of a monster had hurt like hell when it happened. He forgot how many hundreds of stitches had gone into stitching him back up.

Behind him, Stelle sighed sadly before applying the medicine. Her touch was slow this time, as though she was extra mindful to trace this scar into her memory.

“Don’t think about it,” he warned. “I would have taken that hit for any of the crew. And we knew going in none of us would walk away unscathed.”

“I know,” she whispered, leaning forward until her forehead hit his back. “I… I know that. It’s just…”

She didn’t finish, yet Dan Heng understood. It wasn’t easy to just accept what had happened, especially when the people he cared about more than anything were involved. And he knew Stelle felt that just as intensely as he did.

Turning back around, he reached for her, wrapping her up in his arms and pulling her into an embrace. She came easily, allowing him to pull her into his lap without hesitation.

“Sorry,” she muttered, huffing out a bitter laugh. “For killing the mood.”

“Don’t be,” he reassured. “I have a feeling it’s going to take some time before we’re able to adapt to everything that has happened. But the fact we were able to have tonight shows that it’s possible to return to normal. Or, at least a semblance of it.”

She hummed. “I’ll try not to spoil the mood next time. Especially since I was the one who wanted this.”

“I…” He cleared his throat. “It wasn’t as though I didn’t want this, too,” he said.

That got her to chuckle, even if it was slightly strained. “Well, we still have to try Bailu’s little experimental concoction. So we can try again then.”

He’d forgotten about that. But for some reason, testing out that little experiment didn’t sound as bad as it once did. However, whether it was because he could now see the reason for its importance, because he was riding the high of the afterglow, or because of the promise of more was still to be determined. “Alright. Next time, then. We’ll get it right.”

Stelle snuggled closer to him, humming happily in agreement. “It’s a promise.”

[qqtxt]

[🍬] home will come home soon [🦊]

[!] this is for the 500 followers mini fics. click here to find out more! ✿ pairing: yeonjun x reader / idol!txt / non.idol!you / fluff / 531 words / minor cursing (none with ill-intention!) ✿ request: “you feel like home to me.” + yeonjun ✿ goodness, i tried not to make it sad but like... i listened to this cover of ‘home’ and i just :”) [main masterlist 🌸] / [event masterlist] / [tag: #qqtxt: 500]

yeonjun wonders if he knows how pathetic this is or if he was being a hopeful romantic. the kind he hadn’t anticipated to be but... 

“sleeping now?” his voice is soft, despite being alone in a hotel room staring at the person through a phone he wants to reach out and pull through to be in his arms. having turned down invitations to have fun after one of their concert tour performances, here choi yeonjun is: in bed. on a saturday night while it was a sunday night for you; thousands of miles apart, connected through the shitty wi-fi of his hotel and the crisp internet speed from the comfort of your own home.

“mhm, you? i have energy left in me to keep my eyes open if you wanna talk,” you offer, though sleepily (trying your best to sound enthusiastic), yeonjun knows you like the back of his hand that you want nothing more than to just sleep.

he shakes his head into his pillow, hugging the spare one to his chest, “it’s okay. let’s just sleep.”

“okay,” you quickly give in, eyes already fluttering shut but it’s like you know how to draw him out when he lets out a soft sound between a groan and a whine at how fast you were to dismiss him. he gapes at the sight of you tucked in and looking like you’re ready to drift off to dreamland but–”gotchu, didn’t i?” one of your eyes peek open and a cheeky smile lines your lips that sets everything straight in his entire life just looking at you smile.

“c’mon, i know you have something you wanna say first,” you lean up closer to the phone, and yeonjun subconsciously does the same.

slowly, the hilarity dies down and yeonjun watches how your eyes mimic his own. it’s... the heaviness, the sadness. the longing of wanting to be beside each other physically but sometimes life gets in the way of things. it’s inevitable, and it surely isn’t the first time you and yeonjun have spent time apart but it never ever gets easier when you two felt so much a whole together.

"you feel like home to me and...” he murmurs, taking a deep breath before continuing, “i miss you..." the soft crack in his voice is what makes you hug yourself tighter. 

the frown already takes over as you sigh, nodding along, “i miss you too...”

“stop that,” he huffs, now mirroring your expression as his brows furrow.

“you stop that,” you counter, now pointing with your chin.

one, two, three.

“okay,”–”okay,” the two of you say simultaneously, a little choppy because of the internet connection but it’ll do. it’ll always do.

“goodnight, y/n.”

“goodnight, jun-ah.”

“i love you.”

“i love you.”

although each sentence one after another got softer and softer, the amount of love that you two had for each other never ceased to diminish. even though you two were apart in reality, emotionally and spiritually, perhaps digitally, you two were constantly together. and that, this piece of home that yeonjun’s able to take with him is enough to keep him through the tour before he’ll actually, physically return home (to you).

[starshaped-dreamer]

café boy (s.mt)

pairing - seok matthew x fem!reader

genre - coffee shop AU, college AU, fluff, strangers to friends to lovers

warnings - reader is a lil stressed, violence (nothing worse than a punch), very minor injuries, protective matthew, suggestive but not graphic at all

w/c - 2743

a/n - happy birthday matthew! a matthew birthday special I love him so much he's climbing my bias list so fast

You'd been coming to this café for so long, but it was becoming harder and harder to convince yourself it was only for the coffee. But how could you ignore the sweet smiles of the barista, who happened to be working every time you went? His soft voice politely taking your order with a grin was a stark contrast to the toned muscles suddenly on display as he makes your cappuccino, and you found yourself subconsciously heading in that direction whenever you finished classes for the day.

The café was noticeably more quiet than usual as you entered that afternoon, and the cute barista was the only one working. You checked your phone to realise it was almost 8pm, and you had been studying for longer than you intended.

The bell at the door sounded as you entered, catching the boys' attention. He was wiping down the counter, but put the cloth away as soon as he noticed your presence. "Hi there," a bright smile donned his face as he greeted you. "You come here often, don't you?"

You felt your cheeks heat in embarrassment as you realise he recongises you. "Uh, yeah, you make good coffee." He grins. "Speaking of which, I was going to order one, but I just noticed the time. Caffeine right now would be a crime to my sleep schedule."

He laughs, and you could swear the sound was the sweetest thing you've ever heard. "Lucky for you, I make a pretty good hot chocolate."

You mirror his smile, handing over your card. "Sounds perfect."

You take a seat at your usual table by the window, scrolling on your phone as you wait for the boy to make your drink. He brings it over after a short while, and you smile at the way he's decorated it with whipped cream and mini marshmallows. "Thank you, this is exactly what I needed today."

He grins. "I'm Matthew, by the way. Mind if I sit?" He gestures to the seat across from you.

You smile. "Y/N, and not at all."

He slides into the booth. "So, you're a student here? What on earth are you majoring in to warrant you staying here this late?"

"I'm a business major," you sigh. "My partner completely ditched me on this group assignment and now I'm having to put in twice as much work so I can get a good grade."

"Wow, group assignments really suck. You shouldn't give them any credit for this if you've done it all yourself."

"It's a bit easier said than done. He's a teacher favourite, one that can make or break your reputation with a single sentence. But I'll figure it out eventually. What about you? Are you a student too?"

Matthew's hand rests against his face, listening intently to every word you say. "Yep! It would be pretty silly of me to get an on-campus job if I wasn't. I'm a dance major."

You smile, and the conversation continues naturally, you both talking about anything and everything, even after you've reached the final dregs of your hot chocolate.

~

A couple of days later, you were walking to lunch before you heard someone call your name. You turn around to find Matthew, running towards you, waving his hand in the air. He was wearing jeans and your college's signature hoodie, rather than his striped apron you were so used to seeing him in at the café. The glasses that sat atop his face made your heart race.

"Y/N! Are you heading to lunch?"

You nod. "How about you?"

"Sure am! We should go together." He starts walking ahead of you, and you have to run to catch up to him.

"Where are we going?"

He turns around to face you, walking backwards with a mischievous grin. "It's a surprise. I've been wanting to go here for ages."

You laugh at his excitement; his wonderment at everything was nothing if not refreshing and cute.

You wander just off campus, until you reach a cute storefront of a café. Matthew holds the door open for you, and you gasp as soon as you set foot inside. "A cat café?"

He grins. "None of my other friends wanted to go, so as soon as I saw you on campus I knew you would agree to come."

You smirk. "I don't know if I agreed, it was almost like you dragged me with."

He feigned hurt. "You gave off cat café vibes. I thought it would be more fun as a surprise."

"It was a very nice surprise. Thank you Matthew," you said, and you meant it. You hadn't had a lot of chances to socialise on campus, and you really appreciated his willingness to spend time with you.

~

A couple weeks had passed, and you found yourself getting closer and closer to Matthew. Now you had both met properly, you seemed to find each other everywhere, whether it be studying in the library or eating lunch in the cafeteria. Whenever you both had free time, you'd travel off-campus, finding new and exciting restaurants to try.

Your favourite part though, was the Tuesday night hot chocolates, whenever you'd stay late in the library studying and Matthew was working late. Every week he'd surprise you with a new hot chocolate topping, before sitting down across from you as you both chatted comfortably. It felt good having a friend you could get along with so well.

There was only one problem, however, and that was your stupid group project. You found the workload becoming overwhelming, your late nights in the library becoming even later, and you were starting to lose time for anything else in your life.

There was one particular Tuesday night, a week before your final presentation was due, when you felt like you were at your breaking point. You'd been stuck at your laptop in the library for hours, doing so much but feeling like you were getting nothing done. You were frustrated, at your partner, at how exhausted you were, at everything. The frustration brought tears to your eyes, and you buried your head in your arms, grateful for the lack of people in the building at the late hour.

Suddenly, you felt a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "Y/N? Y/N, what's wrong?"

Your head snaps up at the familiar voice, and you meet Matthew's concerned gaze as he crouches beside your chair. "Are you okay?"

You hurriedly turn your head away, embarrassed as you try to wipe away your tears frantically. He grabs your wrist gently to stop you, bringing it back down to the table but not letting go. He strokes the back of your hand softly, giving you a comforting smile. In his other hand, you spot a takeaway coffee cup, which he places on the table next to you. "I brought you your hot chocolate to go, I figured you got held up studying after you didn't show up for a while."

Your eyes widen, almost comically, as you check the time on your laptop. "Shit! Matthew I'm so sorry. It's been-" You don't even notice the stray tears that fall down your face until a hand against your cheek interrupts you. His thumb gently wipes away any trace of tears, before pulling away so he could sit down in the chair next to you.

"You don't have to apologise. Just tell me what's up, hey? Maybe I can help."

Your heart stutters, both at the unexpected physical contact and his kind words. You go to reject his offer, but seeing him so willing to help, and acknowledging just how stressed you were, you swallow, realising that maybe a little help might be exactly what you need. "It's this stupid group project. It's a lot more work to take on than I realised, and my partner still hasn't done anything. I've texted him so many times, I think he's blocked me."

Matthew frowns, and it's the first time you think you've seen him angry. "What an asshole. What do you have left to complete? I've made my fair share of presentations in my time."

"I'm having trouble researching and doing the PowerPoint at the same time while trying to cover all of these topics."

He thinks for a moment, before pulling his own laptop out of his backpack. "How about if you tell me what to look up, I can find some good sources for you and you can put the information into the presentation?"

You nod with a smile. "You're an actual lifesaver, Matthew. I'm so sorry I kept you waiting at the café."

"Hey, I told you that you didn't have to apologise. I'm more than happy to help, especially when you've just been left in the deep end like this. Now drink up, before your hot chocolate goes cold. I put extra care into making this one." He pushes the takeaway cup towards you, before pushing his glasses further up his face.

~ With Matthew's help, the time it took to finish the presentation was more than halved, and you expressed your gratitude as much as possible by paying for lunch that entire week, despite his protests. But D-Day was finally here, and you had to present it to your entire business class. Matthew had waited for you in front of the building your class was in, pressing a cappuccino into your hands, claiming he'd put his 'good luck charm' on it. You accepted it with a grateful grin, feeling extra prepared for your presentation.

But you were nervous, too. You had something extra up your sleeve for this one. You were going to expose your partner for the freeloader he was, giving zero credit to him and notifying your professor he had done nothing to help. Reputation on the line or not, Matthew had helped an incredible amount, and you would be damned if you were going to let that credit go to your partner.

So, as you finished your PowerPoint, you made sure to leave no trace of your partner's name on the final slide, denying he had helped in any way when your professor questioned you about it. You ignored the way your partner's jaw clenched in anger, proud you finally stood up for yourself.

But just when you thought you were in the clear, your heart dropped as you heard your name, muttered angrily as you left your class.

"What the fuck was that, Y/N?" It was your partner, storming towards you angrily.

"I worked tirelessly trying to do twice as much work since you couldn't bother to do anything."

He scoffed. "I have tons of other classes to stay on top of, I though for one group assessment you'd be fine on your own."

You laughed humourlessly. "Wow. I have tons of other classes too, but was more than willing to put in as much effort as I needed to to make this a good presentation. I even texted-"

Before you could even comprehend what was happening, you fell to the ground harshly, scraping your knee as you felt your cheek sting.

He had punched you.

He was going for another swing, too, before another hand came and intercepted it. Matthew was standing in front of you, knuckles white as his hands were clenched tightly into fists. He shoved your partner forward, nothing but anger radiating off him.

"What the fuck, dude?"

"You punched Y/N," his voice was the deepest and most serious you'd ever heard it. "Who the fuck does that? Now I suggest you make your way, and never bother her again, before your fate turns out worse."

He scoffs. "Whatever man. You guys are nuts, overreacting this much. If I'd known she was such a bitch I wouldn't of been partners with her in the first place. I just heard she got good grades." With that he ran away, and you had to reach out for Matthew's wrist to stop him from running after.

At your touch, Matthew crouches to face you, his expression instantly transforming from angry to worried. "Are you okay? I can't believe he'd do something like that."

You nod, smiling. "I'm perfectly fine, thanks to you. Nothing but a few scratches. Looks like I'm buying you lunch for a week again."

Matthew ignores your joke the moment he sees your knee, scratched and bleeding from the fall. "Ouch, Y/N, that looks painful. Are you sure your okay?"

You were touched at his concern as you nodded, upset the situation had forced him to be this serious. "I can hardly feel it."

His face relaxes slightly, but traces of worry remain. "Still, it would be pretty nasty if that was to get infected. We should clean it." He holds his arms out to help you stand. "Come on, I live on campus, not far from here."

~

You couldn't believe it. You found yourself in the apartment of your campus crush from a month ago, someone who you now considered your best friend, if you ignored those lingering feelings.

They were becoming harder to ignore, however, as you watch the way his tongue sticks out slightly as he focuses on gently cleaning your injury, before applying a band-aid. His focus and care made your heart melt.

"There we go. All done," he looks up to meet your eyes. "Are you sure you're okay? I can't believe that bastard would just punch you like that. All over some lost assignment grade he deserved. What kind of asshole-"

You place your hand on his to stop his rambling. "Matthew. I'm fine, I promise. Thank you for protecting me."

He smiles sadly. "I'm just sorry I couldn't be there sooner," he reaches up to cup your cheek, gently stroking the bruised area where you were punched with his thumb. "Your cheek is bruised and everything. Why would he punc-"

You couldn't help it anymore. You leaned forward, connecting your lips with his briefly to get him to stop talking. You pulled away, your cheeks automatically heating as you avoid eye contact. "I-I'm sorr-"

He leaned forward again, reaching up to cup your face with both hands as he kisses you, this time for longer, putting all the unsaid feelings and emotions into the kiss, only pulling away once you'd both run out of breath. You giggle, from shock and joy. He joins in, laughing too, as he presses his forehead against yours. "I really fucking like you Y/N."

You lean forward, pecking him once more. "I really like you too, café boy. I never visited just for the coffee, you know."

He grinned, before suddenly your lips were connected once more, this time with more passion as he went to lift you so you were seated on the kitchen counter, standing in between your legs. The kiss became more and more heated, as you thread your fingers through his hair, his hands on your waist as you both tried to keep as little space as possible between you.

After a while he lifted you again, and you wrapped your legs around him. He carried you, never once breaking the kiss, to his room before shutting the door.

~

You woke to the first rays of sunlight peeking through the blinds, suddenly aware of the warmth that surrounded you. You lay on Matthew's bare chest, his arms wound securely around you as the soft rise and fall of his chest almost lull you back to sleep. He stirs, his arms wrapping tighter around you before you feel a soft kiss pressed against your temple. "Good morning," he mumbled.

You smiled. "Morning."

He shifted so he was facing you, an arm still wrapped around your waist. "How are you feeling? You don't have a concussion, right?"

You grin mischievously. "Hmm, I'm not sure. What exactly happened yesterday?"

He gasped jokingly. "Maybe this will jog your memory." He presses a gentle kiss to your lips, pulling you ever so close.

You both smile as he pulls away. "Oh of course, I remember now."

He chuckles as you resume your position laying on his chest. "I've wanted this for so long, Y/N."

You lean up to kiss his cheek, which turn pink at your gesture. "So have I. Thank you for everything Matthew."

And every word of it was true. Ever since you met him, no person had made you feel so comfortable. And you hoped that would stay the same for a long time.

[vegaseatsass]

GAP the Series ep 6 thoughts (spoilers!!)

Am about to embark on an epic two-day backread (dw this is like. self-soothing behavior, not an obligation) but first!! Let me quickly journal about GAP: The Intricate Rituals Series.

So this episode made me feral. I'm like "no way can they top what last week did to my brain" and then Sam was out here licking Mon's thigh and barking. GAP girlies, we are truly God's strongest soldiers.

Thigh-licking aside, Thee Moment for me this week was Mon: It's nothing Sam: That means it's something. Mon: How could you possibly know that? Sam: I'm that type of person. How could I possibly not know what it's like? I mean first of all hhhhh Sam recognizing herself in Mon's attempt at disregarding very strong/obvious emotions!!! They are so socially different yet still mirrors of each other!! But second of all, Mon has become such an expert at decoding Sam's chaotic hot-cold indirect communication style, and I realized this week that Sam's approach to understanding Mon when avoiding or withdrawing from her isn't to learn how to read between Mon's lines and carefully interpret her like Mon does with Sam, but to urge Mon towards direct communication, push her past her kneejerk social graces to tell Sam the things she would otherwise swallow down. Not sure if I'm explaining this well but I find it really lovely, that they're both so attuned to each other and so invested in really understanding what the other is thinking and feeling, but they have different, complementary skillsets in how to go about seeking answers: Mon is incredibly perceptive and Sam is incredibly assertive. They're learning from each other too!! Not only is Sam paying close attention to what Mon is feeling but she does this cute thing where she lists off all the evidence of what she's observed (you didn't answer my texts and said no to dinner!), like a student first learning how to do mathematical proofs kdjfsdff Mon meanwhile asks more direct questions of Sam every episode. "What am I to you?" It's no longer enough for her to rely on non-verbal cues. Tl;dr im love them.

"What do you want to eat?" "Your lips" WANNA SUCK MOUTH ENERGY STILL GOING STRONG. Sam is so openly horny it is such a delight to behold.

Jim telling Mon she almost broke up with her fiance when Sam kissed her lmaooo she gets it!! I'm also wondering if she (whether deliberately or subconsciously) shared that to try to provoke a reaction in Mon. Sam's friends are just always stirring the pot to try to make Mon/Sam happen, so the symmetry of Jim taunting first Sam and then Mon with kissies seems intentional. Regardless, I am living for how hard they all ship Sam/Mon, and how they lack a single shred of remorse for Kirk. "If you guys have a beautiful affair we won't tell!!!"

I loved Sam's apology to Jim for oh so many reasons (why is she such a sexy gremlin? "You slap me, I'll kiss you." Sam who taught you to be like this!! I know it wasn't grandma!!), but one of them is all the apology language she's adopted from Kirk and Mon. The fingerheart attempt was so uwu I am having trouble typing about it, but also I'm clocking the snack bribery as something she picked up from Kirk. Before Mon became her role model on how to human, Kirk was there. Like esp if he's been mitigating her grandma's influence on her since she was a kid? I can just see why that was such a central relationship for her before Mon came along. Like I am sad! That he wasn't actually reading the room and wingmanning for her with Mon in ep2! I would have loved that as a story choice sooo much more, he's more annoying for his heteronormativity goggles, and it legit sucks that he's pushing their relationship in earnest when AT A MINIMUM he knows Sam views marriage as a kind of punishment/failure of girlboss aspirations. But I still suspect (what I am anticipating we'll see of) Sam's sense of obligation around his proposal isn't exclusively about obeisance to her grandma. I think there probably was real love there and he probably was a transformative and vital support for her for a lot of her life. Idk I haven't backread any of the tag or anything so this may be a realllly unpopular take lmao but I'm compelled by mess and it's more interesting to me to think that Sam really has loved and depended on Kirk as a partner for most of her life, but she isn't in love with him, something that only became crystal clear after meeting Mon.

On the heteronormativity goggles note: proud of Nop for getting his shit together this fast! I mean I think he always knew, and last week Mon just took away his reason to keep lying to himself about it, but it's nice that he can comfortably transition into Mon's lesbianism supporter. SHE NEEDS ONE

Noticed that she started wearing rainbow earrings after their little discussion btw. Is she beginning to embrace her "like"-like-a-lover-not-like-a-fangirl feelings... signs point to yes. Honestly atp I think all she needed to take that bouquet and propose to Sam herself was some explicit confirmation that Sam sees her as girlfriend material and not as a weird servant-sister, so it's devastating that instead of getting that grounding, the rug was pulled out from under them both. The preview for next week feels v "I don't know if we were dating but I do know she broke up w/ me" and that's the kind of gay representation I desire MOST so thank you but also ow.

Ok sorry for tl;dr post but the last thing I'll say is that right now my reading is that before her conversation with Nop, Mon was not looking too closely at her feelings for Sam or what they could mean about their relationship or her own identity, and that's why for example she gets so upset Sam calls her an outsider but NOT that Kirk is doing couple-y stuff with Sam right in front of her! She knows she wants to be close to Sam and important and more than a sister or a servant to her, but she can't fully-fully embrace the word for what it is that she wants without Sam naming it first. Mon's issue is one of internal expression. On the other hand, I think Sam completely knows what she feels for Mon, and probably always has. She felt guilty and exposed that Kirk was being couple-y in front of Mon because she fully sees Mon as her girlfriend! (Did she not google "how to make up with your girlfriend" lol I mean.) But for her the issue is one of external expression: she can't say what she knows she wants and feels out loud, because at best it would get her disowned and at worst it would get her killed in a car crash like her sister, so she's left slapping her friends and inventing lip-biting games instead of using her words.

Ep 1, Ep 2, Ep 3, Ep 4, Ep 5

[eddiethehunted]

I would like to hear about the Steve cherry lip balm headcanon

*kisses you* thank you for giving me the opportunity to lose my mind about this

i have this headcanon that, a few months after nancy and steve break up officially, steve cleans out his car and he finds one of nancy’s lip balms in the passenger door. he brings it inside with the intention of giving it back to her, but ends up putting it down on his desk and forgetting about it.

a few nights later he finds the lip balm again. it’s just a small, unassuming pink tube on his desk. he’s a couple drinks in and he’s feeling kind of depressed and moody, still not over the breakup with nancy, so in a moment of desperation he puts it on because he’s tipsy and sad and wants to remember how her kisses tasted. (it’s not his best moment. it’s really not. it’s very depressing and a bit pathetic.)

it tastes like wax and artificial cherries. sweet and synthetic. he thinks that nancy must not have worn this all that often because it doesn’t make him think of her at all, really. he looks in the mirror at himself. the balm is tinted. his lips look red and glossy and he’s a bit surprised to realize that he likes it. he Likes It, a Lot. it looks really good, makes his mouth look all pretty. he’s like oh shit this is why girls wear makeup. i look Nice.

he wipes it off a few seconds later, embarrassed even though he’s just by himself and there’s no one to see him wearing makeup. he doesn’t throw it out though. just puts it down on the counter in his bathroom and forgets about it for the rest of the night.

the next day he has a shift at his new job—scoops—and he sees it on the counter. stares at it for a while. imagines it’s mocking him. stares at it some more. and then he picks it up and stuffs it into the pocket in the little blue shorts of his stupid sailor uniform and leaves quickly because he was already running late before he decided to spend several moments contemplating the lip balm.

he feels the weight of it in his pocket for his whole shift with his new coworker robin buckley, who’s pretty cool even though she spends much of her shift making fun of him. he notices that she wears some kind of tinted lip gloss every day and finds himself wondering what kind it is, if it’s similar to his. (too late, he remembers that it’s nancy’s, but at that point his subconscious had already cemented the fact that it’s his now.)

when he’s in the break room wasting time he’s fiddling around with it in his pocket and kinda just. impulsively puts it on because he can’t stop thinking about it. but like, it’s nothing. it’s just lip balm that tastes like cherries, who even cares? he looks at himself in a mirror again and he’s just like, yeah.. yeah. it’s really subtle. looks natural enough, like maybe he was just biting his lips a lot. it’s ok right? it’s fine. no one’s gonna know except him.

and it becomes a thing. he starts wearing it every day and it’s subtle enough that it feels like a secret, and he likes it a lot. likes that it makes him feel pretty in a way he never had before (but he doesn’t examine that too closely because he doesn’t even know how to begin thinking about it). robin definitely notices it, it’s obvious, and he’s panicking a bit but she just glances at his mouth for a second before saying “well i’m gonna go on break. if it gets busy, don’t call me. i won’t come out.” and the nerves calm down once he realizes she totally knows but doesn’t give a shit.

anyway. this is a really long-winded answer to basically say that steve accidentally discovered that he likes wearing tinted cherry lip balm and likes feeling pretty and yes he does wear it every day for the rest of his life as a matter of fact 👄

[yesmaddyposts]

I've been writing angst for several days and needed to break up the fog with something happy and silly, so here is a rough draft snippet of part 2 to my Barbie & Her Android Boyfriend Ken AU:

~~

“This is a bad idea,” Barbie says. “This is a bad, horrible idea.”

On the screen of her phone, Kate shakes her head. “What are you talking about? This is a great idea! It’s the perfect opportunity to see what he can do!”

Barbie paces the length of the hallway with her phone in hand. She takes a peek through the cracked open door to her home office. Ken is still in there, spinning slowly in her desk chair and staring up at the ceiling. He’s been at it for ten straight minutes, and she wonders if dizziness was left out of his programming.

She returns to pacing outside the room. “I can’t bring the world’s most expensive android prototype to Gloria’s vow renewal ceremony!”

“Well you should’ve thought that through before you brought the world’s most expensive android prototype home with you,” Kate reminds her. 

She’s right. Barbie knows she’s right. But she’d let her curiosity get the best of her. Ken had been online for three full weeks now, and so far Mattel had only let him stretch his legs to go between the showroom—a large windowless space designed to look like a standard apartment’s living room, complete with a double sided mirror so executives and engineers could look in without being noticed—and the engineering lab. Ken wasn’t being used to his fullest potential, and none of the executives would listen to Barbie whenever she brought up bringing in real subjects for Ken to interact with. 

They were wasting him. They were impeding his progress, and she had no idea why. She’d tried keeping him distracted for a while, going so far as working overtime just to sit with Ken in the showroom watching television with him. Gloria had even been kind enough to bring some board games from home to test out Ken’s reaction speed. They all learned the hard way through several games of Uno and Candyland just how much of a competitive streak the android really had.

But as the third week of movie marathons and board game nights came to a close, Ken suddenly expressed something to her that just about broke her heart. 

“Barbie, I’m bored.” 

So that’s how she ended up here, at home with a platinum blonde android sitting at her desk. It had been embarrassingly easy to get him into her car. He could walk by himself, and didn’t hesitate to follow her to the parking garage. All he needed was a hoodie and some sunglasses to conceal his face from the security cameras, and then they were free. She had every intention of bringing him back, of course. Just after he got a little outdoor time. It was for research! 

“It’s for research!” She says aloud. 

“Exactly! What better way to research his capabilities than by putting him in a social gathering setting?” Kate’s phone shakes as she props it up against something and leans back on her couch. She whistles sharply and Tanner, her golden retriever, jumps up on the couch for a snuggle. 

“Listen,” Kate starts. “Allow me to impose upon you some Weird Barbie Wisdom.”

“I wish you wouldn’t call yourself that,” Barbie laments. Kate waves her comment away with a dismissive hand. 

“You know just as much as I do that Ken needs practice. The investors are going to want to see him in action sooner rather than later, and with the way things are going he won’t be ready. All of our hard work is going to go down the drain if we do things by Mattel’s book.”

Kate pauses to fend off Tanner when he stands on his hind legs to lick her face.

“The executives are a bunch of nepo-babies who don’t know their head from their ass when it comes to robotics. You gotta start taking risks.”

“But what if something goes wrong? What if Ken isn’t ready to be around all those people so soon?” Barbie bites her thumbnail subconsciously. 

A bitter tang hits her tongue and she purses her lips in disgust. She drops her hand back down to her side. Of all the times she’d tried to stop biting her nails, it had been Ken who really got it to stick. Last week while they’d been watching Bring It On, one of her favorite so-bad-it’s-good comfort films, he noticed her nibbling at her thumb. She did it when she was stressed, bored, or deep in thought. At that point her poor thumb was almost completely bitten down to the skin, leaving it red and raw looking. 

Ken had gently grasped her wrist and brought her hand down, interlacing their fingers. She’d turned to him, caught off guard by how careful his touch was. 

“You shouldn’t do that. It looks like it hurts.” He’d told her. 

Two days later when she came into work, he’d been so excited to tell her that he and Gloria had spent all weekend looking up ways to quit the habit of nail biting. He recommended she get bitter tasting nail polish so that she would no longer get satisfaction from biting, even going as far as to spend ten minutes breaking down all the best brands by price, brand, and product reviews. 

“If the whole thing goes tits up, you’ll have me and Gloria there as backup. We’ll get him out of there with some excuse about food poisoning or being late to a self tanning appointment, whatever.”

Kate scratches the underside of Tanner’s chin, and the dog starts kicking his back leg so hard against the couch cushion Barbie can hear the dull thumpthumpthump of his paw through the speakers of her phone.

“But I’m not worried. We did a great job with Ken’s programming. He’ll be a natural.” 

Kate’s general “it’ll all work out” attitude always had a way of convincing Barbie into things she didn’t want to do. She has a feeling this was going to be no different. She sighs, but before she can respond with another excuse not to go through with this, Ken speaks from inside the office.

“Barbie? Who are you talking to?” 

Barbie pushes open the door and enters the office. She turns her phone around to show Ken her screen. “I’m on a call with Kate from work.”

Ken gets up to see her phone better. When he’s closer, his face lights up in recognition and he grabs the phone from Barbie’s hand.

“Hi, Kate from work!” He exclaims excitedly, his wave at the camera a blur of motion. “Love the new mohawk.” 

“Thanks, Ken!” Kate responds just as excitedly. “I was thinking about dying it a crazy color. Maybe half purple and pink, or ombre.”

As Ken and Kate become invested in the topic of hair color options, Barbie shakes her head and takes a seat at her computer desk. Looks like she’s going to have to go shopping for men’s formal wear. 

[secondclassfangirl]

the touch of a hand lit the fuse

(A lil ficlet I wrote for Silverusso Day. Also on AO3.)

Daniel would be lying if he said he didn’t know what he was doing.

Though in truth, he hadn’t really known—not at first. Not back then. Back then, he hadn’t quite understood the depth of his feelings—what he felt whenever those cold eyes pierced him. What part of him knew, even subconsciously, that he wanted from the very start, and would soon become determined to get. No matter the cost.

As a kid, Daniel never quite felt in control of his own life. From shitty apartments spanning East Coast to West, his father being ripped away far too young, and his mother’s inescapable cycle of working her ass off just to live paycheck to paycheck, Daniel internalized at an early age that the world wasn’t kind to people like him. If you want something, you have to pull teeth to get it—and sometimes that isn’t even enough.

But this—damn it, he’s going to get this. Even if it destroys him.

Daniel knew from that first glance in the garden all those years ago that he wanted Terry, even if he wasn’t exactly sure how. At first it was idolization, almost: Terry was everything Daniel wasn’t. Pale eyes. Perfect body. Not to mention that quiet confidence he possessed, that effortless ability to capture the attention of everyone in the room without lifting a finger. Daniel wanted that—craved it.

But as time crawled by, and the feeling never ceased, Daniel learned that his fixation was so much more than sheer jealousy.

He wanted Terry—on a level deeper and with more ferocity than anything he’d ever felt. Beneath that smooth, perceptive gaze, Daniel felt seen for perhaps the first time in his life. He felt…alive. Every clandestine brush of their fingers, every lingering, wanton gaze, fanned a flame deep within him, lighting up parts of himself that Daniel didn’t even know existed.  

Back then, he didn’t have the capacity to understand that fire. But now—now, he does. And he’s the one with the gasoline.

Even after the betrayal, and the heart sinking realization that he’d been nothing more than a piece in some sick game of chess orchestrated by Cobra Kai, Daniel’s obsession lingered. He knew by the heat in Terry’s eyes, a mirror of his own desire, that he meant so much more than he let on; that even though they met under false pretenses, the connection forged between them was unbreakable. Daniel wanted him, and like it or not, Terry wanted him just the same.

So when Terry waltzes back into his life, so many years later, there’s no question of what to do next. Terry may have used him as a pawn once, but in this rematch, Daniel’s going to make damn sure he sees him as a queen.

It’s simple, really. Daniel’s always had a way of charming people. Captivating them. Casanova, his ma would tease, but it’s deeper than that. Daniel knows how to flirt, but even better, he knows how to get under people’s skin. He knows how to make them feel. Especially Terry.

Daniel did it back then, even if he was unconscious of it—Terry wouldn’t be so hung up on him now if he hadn’t. He’d walked into their first meeting with no intentions other than securing revenge for Kreese, but by the end of it, there was real interest in his eyes. That much Daniel picked up on, even when he was too naïve to understand the rest.

Terry always looked at him like that: like Daniel’s every breath was the sole object of his attention, everything else be damned. For someone of Terry’s standing, Daniel got the feeling that was quite the accomplishment.

Hell, Terry still looks at him like that—and Daniel wonders if he ever stopped. If in passing the billboards, in seeing the commercials, he paused, transfixed, and remembered the way it felt back then when it was just the two of them in that dark dojo, tiptoeing just along the edge of that precarious cliff without ever quite taking the leap.

It never went beyond heated glances and fleeting touches—not then. But now…

Now, things are different. Daniel’s spent too long denying himself this indulgence, and he’s going to make sure he gets a taste.

So when Terry’s around, he lets himself be coy. Flirtatious, even. Not outright, by any means—their relationship always flourished in shadowed corners, not broad daylight. Every parting of his lips, every sidelong glance, is carefully planned, as are the heated remarks that spill from his mouth during each confrontation.

Terry did always like his temper—carved it out of him, after all. So Daniel’s more than willing to let his spitfire side take the reins.

And despite his impassive façade, Daniel knows by the haze in Terry’s eyes that he’s falling right into the trap. That old tension between them, so palpable it could be cut clean through with a knife, mounts beautifully, coming to a head at last in a clash of tongues and teeth, a flurry of wandering hands and panting breaths more devastating than Daniel ever could have imagined.

And as those lips press into his, seeking not just to taste, but to devour, Daniel doesn’t miss the smirk that graces them.

Like he knew what was coming all along.

[simowis]

Monthly nonsense 23.9

I would prefer Mass Effect to be an Idealism/Realism system than a Paradigm/Renegade system and lean more towards Rationality in its options. Rather than the all-encompassing black/white moral dichotomy. It's a pity they've given up the philosophical space for options

Having gone through another dozen or so Prothean/Javik-related fanfics, I realise that my understanding of him is not quite the same as what's in those fics. After re-examining his behaviour in the game, I'm sticking with my own thought of him.

The understanding of the character necessarily depends on the reader, who is a mirror personality created within each individual. As a reader, I'm pretty open-minded, as long as the fanfic representation of him doesn't drastically conflict with the in-game representation; after all, all of Javik's plot dialogue only adds up to two hours in the game, and he certainly has a lot of room for imagination. As the creator, I also hope that my reflection of Javik's performance doesn't conflict with the game's content, but that's as far as I can go.

The moment the work is made public, it has nothing to do with the author, and the meaning of the work is to be discovered through the reader's interpretation; on the other hand, readers have their own subjective preconceptions, and they can never recover the author's original intention, as Harold Bloom said: "All reading is misreading".

——

Javik says: To the Protheans, the ability to sense touch is as natural as breathing. So I guess for their race, most of the daily communication is done by touch. Talking is a very inefficient way to spread information. They don't have auricles, just modest ear holes. So their auditory system isn't that important, and lower volumes might be inaudible.

I can reasonably surmise that in their flourishing cycle, communication by speech was a condescending courtesy when confronted with other races. Nowadays, with everyone watching countless videos every day, it's easier to imagine. If you have information so important that it would kill everyone not to listen, and you need to tell it to a few primitives, you don't show them your 'magic mobile phone video' right away, because that would scare them, but you learn their language bit by bit and convince them in their own way. That's what Javik is doing. So why would anyone have the impression that he's arrogant?Obviously, his way of dealing with 'primitives' is polite and fair.

——

Javik and the Turrians have very similar opinions about war. They can actually get along quite well. He and Garrus will eventually have a good relationship.

It's interesting to imagine communication between Protheans. Mere touch shouldn't be enough to put the other person in a state of first-person experience, and their tactile exchange should manage to be limited to sharing some of their senses.

How big can his mouth open?

Fanfic is so hard to write :(

The Hanar language translator may have come from the Protheans, as the Protheans' gift allowed them to help the Hanar move from an optical language to a sonic one.

I always thought prothean was once aquatic.

I get a sense of the ideological differences through country differences in fiction.

Love is selfish, love is possessive, love cannot be selfless. That's why protheans don't get it.

I often wonder what kind of advice he would give me if I didn't do well enough. Maybe he'd say something about not being able to compete with others, or maybe he didn't care too much about it, or maybe he'd say not to overwork yourself and that the most important thing is your body? He's not as strict as Vegeta, not in the way that Vegeta would strive for perfection. Maybe he'll be the side of my personality that tells me to do things in a moderate way.

what kind of music fit him?

So Javik use the word “affection”, not “love”, to comment the “join” fact about Shepard…hmm.

His subconscious was filled with despair. Without stopping his speech, his line includes how to live and how to die properly. This is the truth of his inner thoughts.

I had thought that the internet would be eternal, and that my story would be seen by more and more people as it was shared on the internet. But no, the Internet is still young and has yet to suffer major setbacks, parasitic on countless companies, servers and personal computers. The carriers of information are constantly changing. How many oracle bones can the current generation see, how many old books still contain all the information? The medium evolves, iterates. The old medium gets old and disappears with most of its information. I envy the Prothean Echo Shard, the high level of technology they have preserved is testament to the peak of their civilisation. The stories of the Protheans can be remembered for as long as there is a single Prothean left in the world.

I feel like my love for him has calmed down a bit. Instead of a blazing fire, it's now quietly smoldering. It's been four months and I've been blazing a little longer than last time. He's still there, he's become a part of me.

LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!

Still cannot resist him, cannot love any other person now, oh, why?

It was clearly ill-considered and made most people think negatively of him when he said something like 'rule over you primitives' in the first communication in Normandy. It probably didn't matter to him, there was no hope of resurrection, his race was gone, all he had to do was find a battlefield to die on. He had never thought that there might be a future, even if it wasn't his own.

Want to hear Mordin’s suggestion about sex with prothean and human…

It feels like he would say that you humans are full of liars and that your race needs a great purge. Then he listened some more and understood. So, there are so many different factions of your race, then he can understand and says that your race is very skillful in deceiving each other tactically.